#my dudes i just had to learn how to use excel to control my anger issues lmaooooo

[hattoriscap]

my boss's boss told me he wanted my help. turned out. he doesnt know. how to use lookup tables in excel.

said he Surfed The Next for 3 days n used chatgpt n found nothing 😔

[ben-talks-art]

Trapped and Dreaming Freedom

So I've been reading these two webtoons lately about female leads stuck in very toxic and unhealthy relationships (while being aware of it), and I'm loving every second of it!

If you know me, you know I just love a badass cool female lead and I also love seeing characters stuck in very difficult situations and watching how they use their brains and/or skills to get out of it, and both comics excel at these aspects!

First series is "Trapped", a comic about this taxi driver who got tangled by accident with a vampire who develops an obsession with both her and her blood after she manages to outsmart him a couple of times, something that hasn't happened to him in years.

It feels very "Tom and Jerry" with both characters trying to get the upper hand on their relationship, and you would think it would be super one-sided but vampires actually have quite a bit of annoying rules on how they work that severely limit their freedom and our female lead exploits as many of them as she can to make him eat sh*t! It's just glorious!

"Dreaming Freedom" is... somehow less dark, and at the same time way darker of a series.

It's not as violent or gory but it deals with more realistic problems that hit closer to home for some like school bullying, abandonment, harassment, family abuse, and so on.

The premise is that our female lead teams up with a guy that has the power to use dreams to affect people in the real world, and they use this ability to get revenge on all the girl's classmates that harassed her, but the more our female lead does that, more the male lead gets obsessed with her and we later find out that he has some serious anger issues making him extremely dangerous.

Our lead basically goes from "I can use him to get payback!" to "Oh my God, I'm the only thing that's keeping this dude under control and away from people!"

It feels like you're being handed a living knife that you just pray won't run out of control or turn itself against you. It's so uncomfortable but at the same time so thrilling!

While I really don't like when unhealthy relationships are glamorized and used to send some kind of "Oh, he's kinda dangerous... But at least he loves you, so it's okay, right?" message, I do like it when the unhealthiness of the relationship is the focus AND is painted as a problem that needs to be fixed.

I like how both female leads always call the male leads on their bs and keep them in check whenever they start going too far, and it's fun to see how they use them whenever they're backed into a corner by the antagonists of the stories.

Also like the themes these series explore, about how when you keep dealing with people that act like monsters you see yourself slowly turning into a monster yourself and start to attract other monsters as well, eventually making you question how far can you go? How far should you go? Can you get back from it? And so on.

But most of all, I like that both series make sure to show that these "bad boys" were their last freaking options. Not the first, not the second, but the very bottom of the barrel. They went to them only after they felt they had no other choices and were sure that nobody else would take their side.

This isn't just "Oh, I went to him because he's a hot bad boy", this is "The world turned its back on me so I'm gonna use the only cards that I have left."

They basically made a deal with their devils and now the fun is watching to see how/if they're gonna get out of it.

This is how I like to see problematic relationships. You don't paint them as something normal or something good, you paint them as a hardship that needs to be dealt with and use it to do clever commentary on the worst aspects of humanity so we can learn how to be better and as a source for good and intense drama to make us worried for the main characters and invested in seeing them get out okay.

[batmanrogues-scenarios]

Thoughts on Batman Arkham Origins

Main Story

Opening is nice

Black Mask before Jason? That's interesting

Killer Croc helping Black Mask was a surprise

I don't think Roman threatening Waylon is good idea

It feels like Roman's normal voice is higher and he tries to make it deeper when intimidating people

Well at least Batman didn't let Croc die

I'm going to add some new characters

Also Bane wasn't originally in Gotham?

Of course, it was Nigma behind the towers, it's funny that Batman guessed his name

Can Batman stop choking people?

Gotta admit Electrocutioner has a style.

Aight nevermind that was hilariously lame lmao

Tracey is kinda cute

Yo Candy 👀

Falcone wanting his son back is somehow heartwarming

Hi Slade, didn't see you since Teen Titans

His fight actually looks interesting, the wacking is kinda funny

Love how confused he is by Batman

Penguin is a sleaz in this version

Anarky is like "We live in society"; nice voice though

No one's believes Roman is dead but its a nice mystery;

Ooh, first time he heard of the Joker

I find it cool that Anarky was impressed Batman saved those places; didn't expect him to be called a kid, how old is he?

The thing is, he is right in what he is saying, but it's the way he wants to solve these problems it the issue

Him wanting Batman to mentor him my heart! Baby, no, please just learn from your mistakes

Batman was right to beat these cops

Hey Barbara! Interestingly, Jim didn't like Batman at the beginning

When it was said there was piece of white clothing I knew it was Roman

Ok didn't expect the guy to force a Roman hand in killing his girlfriend, that was evil

The way that Joker is once again the main villain should be annoying, especially with the premise they set up, but I think they did it in a good way; it's honesty cool since it's the first time Batman had heard of him

The Mad Hatters bunnies 💀

The fucking sir bit lol, I would love to annoy him; his reason for controlling people is very interesting

Of course he fucking choked him

Wonderland looks cool

"Drained a bit of that willpower of yours" He just went through a fucking door, calm down

He really traumatized her huh?

The girl is laughing, definitely Joker gas

Wait, that's Joker in costume?! Holy shit he is amazing voice acting

And he just beat the shit out of the Roman!

(Since it was Joker from the beginning I can't use it for characterization? )

Is Shiva with Al Ghoul?

Of course Roman has heart problems because of his anger lol

He looks kinda nice tied up

FOR FUCK SAKE BRUCE STOP BEATING THE SHIT OUT OF LYING MAN

Copperhead scared the shit out of me

Ok that was torture, Batman wanted to torture a guy. BTAS would be so angry at his other self

Wait, is her venom is like a fear toxin?

Alfred's speech was sad.

The guilt goes hard in this

The problem with Deadshot is apparently dude is an imposter? I don't know how to characterize him.

Never mind, he wasn't in the game long enough.

Joker still doing BM impression is hot

Electrocutioner just playing a video game, dude really is asking to die

The guy who voices Joker does an excellent job, why were people complaining about him?

Yep expected it

Firefly looks cool

Bane is badass

Batman was allowed to beat Jokers ass

The Bane pose is seriously iconic

Of course Joker laughs when falling to death

Joker not understanding why Batman saved is very nice

Joker to Blackgate? That's gonna be interesting

Wait it's Harley?! But they meet in Arkham

The imagination is seriously weird but fits

Joker saying Batman changed his life is… interesting

Oh, his Red Hood backstory

Oh it's pretty gay not gonna lie

Wait, she thought he was talking about her while he was talking about Batman lmao

Alfred is trying to be a good father, fuck off Bruce

The Nigmas passwords are amazing

The cop just going 'Yup' kills me

Bane knowing who Batman is a nice twist

I get why Gordon doesn't trust Batman but he is helping with bombs, come on man

Aww they started to like each other

Alfred use the shotgun

I know he won't die because he is in other games but it's sad seeing Bruce actually be desperate

Looks like gloves were a good idea

"Don't drink and drive, you'll kill someone " "Yeah yeah what are you in for?" "Manslaughter " that got a chuckle out of me

He already has Harley around his finger, don't like how they changed how they met but at least her voice isn't so annoying

Why the fuck does Joker wants to die so badly?

"Maybe you shouldn't move?" Shoots them; Good job Jim!

Gordon is a good man

And that's how he earned respect from Jim, good job Bat; also it's nice for him to ask for help where the fuck did go in the future?

I love how Gordon just fucking hits sniper with a bat

It's fun; although Barbara should have looked up to her dad and just have Bat as inspiration for her suit but eh

Are they teasing Suicide Squad?

Initiation DLC

It's nice seeing what League was like and what they teached but it just fighting, boring.

Cold, Cold Heart

Now THIS, this is what I'm talking about

Love the opening, the speech was so fake

Didn't expected Penguin to mix

The fact that Bruce actually has respect for Ferris will make learning the truth pretty fun

The new suit looks goofy

Lmao the callback to future roof dropping with the Diller

The realization in Bat voice when he finds out what happened, perfect

Why did Freeze freeze Nora in her dress? She looks beautiful but it doesn't seem practical

She looks beautiful

Overall

Enjoyed it, might actually be my favorite game (and since I know few plot points from Knight it might stay that way).

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 15

(Masterpost)(Other Canary Content)

Warning: Spoilers for all 50 episodes!

This rewatch is going to fit into a single post, because a third of the episode is just crying and yelling on a very slow boat. If you want to learn the Chinese words for “Mother” and “Father” this is your episode. 

Captain Blowhard

Clan Leader Yao shows up, having barely survived the massacre of his clan, along with two disciples who aren't too excited about their unwilling promotion to top targets. Jiang Cheng tells his dad that the Wens are systematically exterminating the smaller clans, and have said anyone who helps the survivors is going to be punished. 

Jiang Fengmian tells Yao that the Jiang Clan will protect him. Which is why Wei Wuxian is responsible for the massacre of the Jiang Clan. 

Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian both think that taking Yao to the Jin clan is the best way to keep him safe. Wei Wuxian was wrong to help the heirs of the powerfullest richest clans, but sure, let's save this asshole.

Road Tripping

The boys go down to the dock to send Jiang Yanli and Jiang Fengmian off, saying a formal goodbye with a bunch of disciples and showing off how extremely good they look in these close-fitted, simply cut robes with cool belts.

Yu Ziyuan comes down to say goodbye to Yanli and give her some medicine, covering by saying it's for Jiang Fengmian, because being sick is bad for marriage prospects, probably. 

Later the boys will mention their hope that YZY will be mollified by the time JFM returns, which means this possibly isn't the usual state of their relationship. The dislike and jealousy seem to be constant, but perhaps being openly at war with each other is not.

(more after the cut!)

Club Ruohan

At Club Ruohan, Wen Ruohan is tired of sitting on his big uncomfortable throne so he's sitting on the floor next to it, instead. He's suffering the embarrassing problem of black smoke leakage, and needs Wen Qing to give him acupuncture to fix it, but she's not around. Wen Ruohan has an awful lot of trouble containing resentful energy, possibly because he is controlling a bunch of zombies 24x7 instead of letting them take a break. Wei Wuxian is mostly able to control it--except when he, you know, totally isn't--without ever needing an attractive acupuncturist to give him a poke.

WRH learns from Wen Chao that Wei Wuxian 1. killed a boss-level monster on nightmare level difficulty without his sword 2. took whatever thing had been suppressing the nightmare monster for the previous really long time.  WRH wants whatever it is.

Boys in Charge

When the boys get back to Lotus Pier, Jiang Cheng doesn't understand why they couldn't all go to the Lins together, and Wei Wuxian explains it to him. Wei Wuxian is the one seeing the big picture, and he wants to plan how to handle the Wen forces when they, inevitably, arrive. 

Jiang Cheng would rather talk big than actually plan, showing how--at this age--his anger management problem is an issue on a strategic level, not just a personal one.  As a clan leader he will eventually master this aspect, for the most part, and learn to keep a cool head in regard to martial matters, while continuing to feed his interpersonal rage problem.

The brothers supervise the archery practice of the Jiang disciples, having their last nice time together, and still without a plan. Wei Wuxian is bored and calls practice early so he can go be bored on the porch or in his room, since he isn't allowed out. In fact he's so bored by lockdown that he starts an irreverent niche blog.  

(he’s kidding! keep your mask on, don’t go to wine houses)

Knowing that the Wen Clan is gunning for enemy cultivators, Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng send the whole group of disciples, including children, outside the compound walls to retrieve their kites. This is what happens when you don't have a plan.

Wen the Levee Breaks

Wen Chao’s girlfriend Wang Lingjiao finds a kite with a hole in it and uses it as a pretext to snatch up the youngest disciple. 

The other disciples come running back and tell WWX and JC what happened. Wei Wuxian calmly gets all of the information from them and starts figuring out what to do, while Jiang Cheng freaks out. 

Jiang Cheng is a good fighter, and matures into an excellent one after a core upgrade and war experience. But Wei Wuxian is a born battle leader, developing strategies on the fly and staying cool under pressure.

Madame Yu is as brave as a barrel full of bears and Yinzhu and Jinzhu chase lions down the stairs

Yu Ziyuan and the murder twins show up and all of the disciples line up behind them, relieved to have someone scary in charge.. Yu Ziyuan is also a natural leader and an awesome fighter, but her judgement is terrible, as we're about to discover. 

Bitchfest

Wang Lingjiao strolls in to the main hall and has the nerve to comment on the interior decorating, because it doesn't have enough rough-hewn black rock and lava pits, apparently.

She shows them all the kite and says that because it looks (kind of) like the sun, using it for target practice is an attack on the Wen Clan. Bitch, everything your clan wears and uses has fire on it and is red. The sun is not your emblem, no matter what the text says. This kite situation is presumably where the anti-Wen campaign gets its name of "Sunshot," however, which sounds pretty cool.

Wang Lingjiao moves along to her main point, which is that Wei Wuxian needs his ass kicked, and she'd like Yu Ziyuan to do the kicking. To goad her, she starts talking about the rumors about Wei Wuxian's parentage.

Let it Whip

So let it whip (let's whip it, baby) Get a grip (let's whip it baby) Well, what's your trip? (Oh no)

Yu Ziyuan takes the bait, and proceeds to whip the shit out of her strongest battle asset, in a sequence that's either horrifying or completely fucking awesome, depending on how you feel about whump.

There are a lot of bad effects in this show and a lot of questionable fighting, but any time Zidian flies, I am HERE for it. I gave this beatdown its own gifset over here.

Jiang Cheng is devastated and tries again and again to protect Wei Wuxian, but his mother and her lieutenants keep moving him out of the way so the beating can continue.

Yu Ziyuan hits Wei Wuxian at least 5 times, until he is totally unable to get up off the floor. Wang Lingjiao has succeeded in eliminating him as a threat for the moment.

Gotta Hand It To You

Wang Lingjiao isn't satisfied with the brutal whipping, however; she wants his right hand as a trophy, and for him to be unable to recover.  Yu Ziyuan tells Jinzhu and Yinzhu to close the doors because some blood is going to fly. 

I'd like to think this is when Yu Ziyuan decides to kill the Wens, rather than maiming WWX, but I'm not certain. Because she doesn't start attacking until after Wang Lingjiao says the Wens are taking Lotus Pier, and tells her to discipline Jiang Cheng. So maybe she is okay with taking WWX’s hand, but draws the line at giving up her house.

Through all of this, Wei Wuxian doesn't once protest, even when he thinks they're getting ready to take his hand off. He'll do whatever it takes to make peace. THIS is the core of his heroism; he will sacrifice anything to do what he thinks is right. He's not "playing the hero;" not doing this for fame or kudos, but for a clear conscience.

It’s a Murder Party

Wang Lingjiao explains the new Wen World order, and Yu Ziyuan smacks her to the floor and then takes out all 8 of the Wen soldiers in one elegant move. 

Can we talk about how incredibly effective a fighter Yu Ziyuan is, without a sword? With her first-class spiritual tool as her only weapon? Nobody is telling her she needs to carry a sword. She shows she can use one, after she gives Zidian to Jiang Cheng, but she's absolutely devastating without one.

Having defied Wang Lingjiao, Yu Ziyuan...doesn't kill her. She chokes her, slaps her and yells at her. Then she insults her clan and sticks her FOOT on her FACE.

She sics the murder twins on the guards in the room, and they shank all of them at super speed while the boys watch with alarm. 

Then she has them sloooowly advance on Wang Lingjiao, giving her plenty of time to holler for Wen Zhuliu before they can kill her.

Het Heat

Wen Zhuliu comes flying in, literally, kicking both murder twins across the room at the same time. This is followed by Core-Melting Hand x Violet Spider suddenly becoming the most shippable M/F couple in this thing, because wow, they have some serious chemistry.

I never saw a pretty girl look so tough

Actor Feng Mingjing continues to do an awful lot with almost no lines, in his portrayal of Wen Zhuliu. WZL politely apologizes to Yu Ziyuan. Is he offering to withdraw, or is he just being polite before getting down to the killy bit? Either way, Yu Ziyuan is ready to rumble, and doesn't even consider de-escalating.

You know who was able to rein in his temper, after fighting with this same extremely dangerous dude, and therefore lived to fight another day? Fucking Nie Mingjue, that's who, who has a generational CURSE making him angry. While Yu Ziyuan, is like, "fuck the safety of my clan, this is Wei Wuxian's fault anyway" and throws down.

Wen Zhuliu and Yu Ziyuan proceed to have an epic, sexy fight, where he catches her whip and she dodges his attempt to feel up her core.

He's a magic man, mama, he's got the magic hands.

Wei Wuxian, still incapacitated, tells Jiang Cheng to stop Wang Lingjiao from calling for help, but JC gets distracted by the threat to his mom, and goes to engage with Wen Zhuliu.

Jiang Cheng takes a horrifying smack in the chest, which injures him and takes him out, while Wang Lingjiao sends the signal that seals the fate of Lotus Pier.

It’s All Over Except for the Crying

Yu Ziyuan immediately sees that she's lost the battle, and has the murder twins divert Wen Zhuliu while she brings the two boys to the pier. 

She verifies that Jiang Cheng's core is still intact, showing the viewers, for future reference, that it's possible to tell by touch if someone's core is missing, although a casual touch won't do it.  

Then she re-codes the Zidian so that it recognizes Jiang Cheng and puts it on his wrist. She follows this with a display of maternal affection for Jiang Cheng unlike anything we've seen so far, which super fails to reassure him.  

She follows this up with screaming at Wei Wuxian and telling him how much she hates him, and blaming him for the multiple shitty choices she just made..  

With a heart full of rage, she reminds him that his worth lies in what he can do for more important people.

She binds the boys with Zidian and then sends the boat on its way....

...with a frickin' TALISMAN, holeee shit. As toxic as she is for Wei Wuxian, there is a direct line from her cultivation skills to his.  

Dad To The  Rescue...sort of

The last third of the episode is basically yelling and crying punctuated by a couple of interactions out on the water. The extreme emotions go on for long enough that I eventually stop feeling bad for the characters and start feeling bad for the actors, who had to maintain this level of feeling for probably days of shooting.

The boys eventually meet up with Jiang Fengmian and Jiang Yanli. JFM discovers that Zidian responds to his control, which tells him something is very, very wrong, since it probably knows how his wife feels about him.

This thing isn’t biting me; your mom is in serious trouble. 

Here Jiang Fengmian decides to do the heroic, totally futile thing, which is exactly his style. He tosses Jiang Yanli in with the boys and takes his leave so he can go die with his wife while the children survive.  

He has to know that Yu Ziyuan is the stronger fighter of the two of them, and that he's not going back to rescue her. He's just going to stand with her and die together, which is the most romantic thing you can do in a C-drama, after all.  

How Much Do You Owe the Jiang Clan?

Jiang Fengmian tells his two children not to cry, making them and the viewer cry extra hard. (specially ouchy gifset here).

Then he turns to Wei Wuxian and, with a heart full of tenderness, reminds him that his worth lies in what he can do for more important people.

Next episode: Is going to be even more horrible! 

Soundtrack: 1. When The Levee Breaks, Led Zeppelin 2. The Tale of Custard the Dragon (poem) by Ogden Nash 3. Let it Whip by the Dazz Band 4. U Got the Look by Prince & Sheena Easton 5. Magic Man by Heart

[theheavenlymoon]

I totally did this out of order, so let’s try this again!

I would like you to meet Uzuki Hanako! (うづき- Uzuki はなこ- Hanako)

(My first introduction was a hot mess, so I wanted re edit that one and put up this one instead!)

(I can’t draw for crap so I’m using picrew.)

This will basically be me talking about her rather than all the fandoms she’s in. I’m gonna be making post about her and the fandoms later, but for now it’s all about her!

First Name: Hanako

Last Name: Uzuki

Gender: Female

Race: Demigod

Age: ??? (Depending on the fandom, her age changes)

Birthday: December 27

Zodiac: Capricorn

Height: 6’3.3

Sexuality: Bisexual

JP CV: Ami Koshimizu

ENG CV: Amanda Céline Miller

FRENCH CV: Indila

(Couldn’t find a Greek CV 😔)

Nicknames: Shachi-chan (Floyd), Child of Hearth (Malleus), Ms.Herbivore (Leona), Princess, Wifey (Gojo)

Favorite food: Cheesecake, literally anything sweet

Least favorite food: Hummus, mushrooms, candy, and beans

Likes: family/friends, cooking, singing really loud to her music, working out, making clothes, nail polish, memes/vines, rain/cloudy weather, animals, purple, doing anything around the house, video games, anime, fictional books, roughhousing, and day dreaming about her crush/significant other

Dislikes: Fights between friends and family, Candy, crying in front of people, and bookshelves

Since I can’t draw I have to use picrew, but sadly some of the makers that I find have limited options so allow me to go into detail about her looks. (I’ll probably make another post about her abilities later)

Hanako has bright gold eyes and long lavender hair that goes all the way down to her mid thigh. She has two beauty marks, one under her right eye and one on the left side of her lip. Her signature hair style is space buns with the rest of her hair down in the back. Like I’ve said before, I can’t draw so I’m using characters I know as reference! This is what her body looks like.

(^ This is Flare, a character from fairy tail! I recommend watching it if you have time. Fairy tail is a very long series, but it’s really good!)

(I’m pretty sure you can look at almost all the women in Fairy tail and get the idea.)

Obviously I know that Hestia doesn’t have any demigod kids but demigods don’t have to be born the normal way. Hanako was born from fire and was given to her father. With that being said, when Hana was first claimed she was given a fire place poker but traded it in for a sword so she it could help control her pyrokinesis. (Her sword is disguised as a charm bracelet!)

As for her sword...

Hana’s sword helps her control her pyrokinesis a little better and it’s fun to try and see who can pick it up. Her sword can reach up to about 2000°F (1093°C). She has a few special moves but those are for another time.

Although Hana acts like her mom in some moments, she met Apollo and Hermes when she was quite young and those two have had a big impression on her personality. One moment she giving motherly advice, and the next moment she screaming vines across the room.

Random facts about Hanako 🌸✨

Since Hana means flower I use cherry blossoms and lavender to represent her.

Has a huge soft spot for children!

Hanako is super understanding and open. Wanna try something new? She’ll come with you, so you aren’t lonely and scared. Skydiving? What time are we leaving? Want to be left alone? Call her if you need something! Wanna try working out? She’ll be your personal trainer! Feeling down? She’s coming over with movies and snacks! Can’t make it to game night? It’s alright just be safe with whatever your doing!

Once Hanako falls, she falls hard.(Romantically speaking) She is a SIMP. She’ll wear the most giddiest smile after talking with them. Probably screamed in her pillows at least a few times. “They make my heart beat so fast, and they make me feel like the happiest girl in the world!!” - Hanako.

Attempts her best not to be obvious about her crush, and for the most part it works. Until anything other than platonic stuff comes up. Her face is gonna turn crimson if ANYONE mentions her crush in not so platonic ways, gods forbid anything even more intimate. Children of Hestia are so shy when the idea of sexual things is even bought up that they blush deeply and cannot articulate any coherent words, and any fire nearby also turns crimson as if it were blushing like the child of Hestia. This shyness is amplified if they are around their crush.

Gets kind of anxious when she’s beside a bookshelf.

She’s a smart ass. It’s gotten to the point where she does it automatically. It doesn’t even have time to process, it just comes out.

Hana is actually really good at acting and singing. She was in a few commercials and videos when she was younger but only as background characters.

Hana is amazing with kids. She grew up with 3 little brothers before she was moved into the orphanage, which meant even more kids to watch over. (she takes her big sister role very seriously)

Since she was born from fire, she can raise her body temperature up if she wanted too, and she rarely gets hot or cold. Heat based attack have no effect on her. Hana’s hugs feel like a warm blanket wrapped around you while sitting next to a fireplace, all in all just really comforting

Hana grew up around a lot of guys and so she calls everyone ‘bro’ and ‘dude’ a lot. She has a few friends who are girls but most of them are guys. That being said, she grew up rough housing and yelling.

Hana also comes from a very affectionate family. (Hugs, kisses, feeding food to each other, smashing food into someone’s face, etc.) So it’s not uncommon to see Hana tackle all of her friends into hugs and kisses.(platonically)

Hana also likes to tease a lot (curtsy of Hermes) so don’t be surprised when she tease about you burning food.

Is super flexible. I’m talking like, Mitsuri flexible. Her friends have at least saw her in the scorpion pose a few times. The more flexible she is, the easier it is to move in battle.

The woman is a tree. I’m pretty sure all of her lovers (with the exception of Gojo) are shorter than her.

She can not, for the life of her, wear heels. Anything above a 3 inch that isn’t thick, would make her snap an ankle. Besides she’s already tall enough

In terms of anger, Hana has the patience of a saint. She still gets annoyed here and there, but very rarely does she get genuinely angry. On the rare occasion that she is angry, she gets pretty violent. Veins showing from her forehead, her body temperature spikes, and she wears one of the most nastiest glare ever. (from what she’s been told) Only a select few have seen her mad.

When thrown into a new situation (or a new world-) that isn’t familiar, Hana will come off a bit sarcastic (more than usual) and aloof. She wants to get a feel for her surroundings before she can actually be herself. Give her some time to come around and she’ll be back to hyper and happy.

Hana has a bunch of hobbies. She plays volleyball and is known as the queen of the court. She loves to paint her fingernails and her toes as well. Her cooking is top tier! As a Hestia child obviously she would excel at anything that has to do with domestic and home type things.

She 100% would/will make her own dress. Once made a huge ball gown dress because none of the place had what she was looking for.

When she isn’t doing any of her hobbies she’s working out and practicing her pyrokinesis. Hana trained a lot back where she was from, so she could master her pyrokinesis and her sword. She’s gotten to the point where she can lift a car. Just because she’s in a different place doesn’t give her the excuse to slack off!!

Ironically her mother is a virginal goddess and isn’t married to anyone. Hana on the other hand, wants to get married and have kids. She shooting for 4 but it all depends on what her partner wants. (2,6,8 it just depends)

Hestia children can induce serenity and make tense situations a lot more calmer. Hanako has defeated a lot of enemies and monsters this way.

Hanako knows 4 different languages. English, Japanese, Greek, and French. She was taught Japanese by her father and Greek by her mother. She learned French and English herself

Even though Hana loves to do girly things, makeup is not one of them. She always thought it was pretty cool but she never had the time to sit down and practice it.

Thank you for reading✨ I had a lot of fun making this and I can’t wait to write more stuff about her! I’ll probably have to learn how to make a master post so her stuff is easier to access. If you have any questions about Hana my inbox is open, or you can message me in private, either way works!

I hope you stick around for more content with Hanako! 🌸🔥✨

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

Hola Mishamigos! It’s Friday and I am here with more nonsense from my SPN rewatch - dudes, we are all SLEEPING on Season 11, in both good and bad ways.  There is so much in just the first trifecta of “Out of the Darkness, Into the Fire;” “Form and Void;” and “Bad Seed” (since “Baby” deserves her own analysis) -  so come relive my rewatch with me.  This is a summary of some things that stood out for me (few are analysis, most are clowning; basically this is a pared down live tweet - you’re welcome/I'm sorry); copy/paste from the script is included with my own emphasis:

OUT OF THE DARKNESS INTO THE FIRE [11x01]

-There’s lots more to this episode, but really this is the most important and relevant part (also it’s too soon and I am offended, damaged, attacked and hurt) -

DEAN: Yeah, whoa. All right, take -- take it easy, okay?  (gesturing to the deputy’s wound) Bad guys?

JENNA: Rebar. I sought cover. I fell.

***LIKE EXCUSE ME, but what in the actual fuck.  Did they just decide to pull that from the episode four years later to emotionally traumatize us in the subsequent rewatches? I know it’s probably coincidence but my sad soul has not recovered *enough* for rebar’s first SPN appearance to be right now in this moment when I am blissfully 5 entire seasons away from the dead end in the road.

- The only other important part of this episode - when Dean takes the call from Cas privately first before putting it on speaker for Sam, and something about this exchange is so endearing-

(Dean’s phone rings) 

DEAN: Where the hell are you, Cas?

(The scene flips between Sam and Dean at the hospital, and Castiel in the woods.)

CASTIEL: I'm...I'm okay.

DEAN: You don't sound okay.

CASTIEL: Dean, I am fine. Besides, what I have, you can't help me.

DEAN: What do you mean, what you have?

CASTIEL: Just please tell Sam -- Rowena escaped with the Book of the Damned and the codex.

DEAN: Okay, forget Rowena. Where are you?

CASTIEL: Now, you tell me -- the Mark . . .

DEAN: Oh, really? You're worried about me after everything that I’ve --

CASTIEL: Dean, is it gone?

DEAN: Yes. I'm good. I mean, I'm not great.

CASTIEL: Makes two of us.  (Dean puts Cas on speakerphone) This is good news.

SAM: Hey, Cas.

CASTIEL: Sam.

***It’s just so poignant that Dean wanted privacy for the first minutes of that call, probably because he is still haunted about the beating he gave Cas in 10 and *other things,* and Cas is literally being torn apart by Rowena’s curse but he only cares about Dean getting rid of the Mark, and the world is ending but Dean only cares about Cas and where he is -  honestly this scene - I’m - 

***Further thoughts on the Animal Curse/Cas/Dean below under 11x03

FORM AND VOID [11x02]

(love the Genesis call back to this verse in the title - “And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep.”)

-speaking of emotional trauma, this fucking shit again -

JENNA: Yeah. I pretty much grew up here. Learned to ride my bike down the road. Had my first kiss at that blue house over there. Lost my virginity up there (pointing to different house).

DEAN: I'll bet blue house was pissed.

JENNA: She was. (handing Amara to Dean) Do you mind?

***This frustrated/disappointed/angered/saddened me to NO END despite already knowing that it happens constantly on the show, because what was the reason?! Did they have to point out that she had a female love interest for this brief moment just to turn her evil and kill her off?  There was no need to include this detail.  It’s either blatant homophobia or willful ignorance (so also blatant homophobia) that this is what representation means.  I won’t go on because obviously we are aware of this and much has already been said/written about it, but still, fuck this.

-we meet Billie and there is more “FORESHADOWING”-

QUEEN IS SINGING “OH DEATH” aka Death’s entrance song from Season 5 and I am BLOWN AWAY by this almost as much as her amazing voice - like did they know at this point she would become the new Death season later? DID THEY KNOW? I need answers.

Seriously, go listen to it immediately; bask in its glory:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFOm5i6b56o

We also get our first mention of the Empty, so that’s cute that they referenced both Dean’s and Cas’s Season 15 ‘demises’ in the same episode (it’s not cute really and I am crying again now) ->

BILLIE: You and Dean . . . Dying and coming back again and again. The old death thought it was funny. But now there's one hard, fast rule in this universe. What lives . . . dies. So the next time you or your brother bite it, well, you're not going to Heaven . . . Or Hell. One of us -- and, Lord, I hope it's me -- we're gonna make a mistake and toss you out into the Empty. And nothing comes back from that. I know you're dying. I can feel it. You're unclean in the biblical sense. So I'll be seeing you again, Sam . . . Seeing you real soon. Name's Billie, by the way.

-another reason for me to continue denying the flaming trash heap that they tried to call the series finale-

Sam is dying here because he has been infected by the Darkness-vein-animal-exploding-people-plague so he goes to pray about it 

SAM: So . . . I know it's been a long time, but . . . Dean and I, we've -- we've been through a lot of bad. But this is different. This is my fault, and I don't know how to fix it. And if I have to die, I've made my peace with that, but . . . Please. Dean deserves better. Dean deserves a life. There are people out there, good people, who are going to suffer because of me, and I am not asking you to clean up my mess. Hell, I don't even know if you're out there, but . . . If you are . . . And if you can hear me, I, um . . . We need your help, God. We need to know there's hope. We need a sign.

**DABB WROTE THIS F-ING EPISODE.  How are you going to write Dean deserves a life here to just do what you did Dabb.  Don’t get me started on my feelings about this scene in the dark depths of my finale-denying soul.   DEAN DESERVES BETTER INDEED, SEASON 11 SAM. 

To rub salt in this particular wound, they show us THE cutest scenes of Dean with this damn baby so we can have feelings about how great of a parent he could be (also I ADORE that whenever Jared, Jensen, or Misha have scenes in later seasons with young children/babies it is SO clear they slip into their own natural dad mode without even noticing it; these guys just all seem like excellent fathers and it makes me mushy) and even Crowley picks up on that shit and makes his little ex-boyfriend joke (after Demon Dean and most of season 10 there is no way I will ever NOT believe that Crowley and Dean did not take a tumble; I will take no criticism):

CROWLEY: The child likes you. No surprise, really. You're very maternal.

LIKE WHAT IS THIS:

Speaking of King Jackles, next comes the episode he directed ->

BAD SEED [11x03]

-Cas/Dean parallels with the Attack Dog Spell/Mark of Cain-

This arc appears in the 10 finale and then runs through the first three episodes, culminating in this one.  Despite it hurting my heart to see our angel so bloody eyed and feral, I LOVED this parallel; it’s truly brilliant - Cas’s reaction to the attack dog spell is such a mirror to the way Dean dealt with the Mark most of 10.  It’s also beautiful that Dean is the only one that can pull Cas from the spell’s control at the end of this episode; that alley scene between the two of them in 11x02 is so tender and sweet.  I like to think this brought an entire new layer of depth to their connection, because no one truly understood how Dean felt under the influence of the Mark until now (someone write a fan fic about this exchange!!!!!!) I *love* this journey for them (please say that sentence in Alexis Rose in your head).  Bonus that  the episode containing my most favorite of *domestic* phone calls with Dean and Cas follows this one, and also Dean’s SHORT SHORTS follow because now he is just walking around the bunker in short shorts while Cas is there and I maintain this is because of this new level of closeness.  As previously stated I ACCEPT NO criticism.

ALSO OF COURSE THE FACE CUP THAT JENSEN HIMSEF DIRECTED HIMSELF TO DO.  I STAN A KING. I HEREBY DEMAND AT LEAST ONE FACE CUP PER EPISODE OF THE MINI SERIES JENSEN.

***I just saw something posted by @watchthebeesandfish​ back in 2015 when digging around the internet re: this episode - that this was the first time both Dean/Cas had seen each other as “themselves” since that heart wrenching bridge scene in 9x10, when Dean walks away from Sam/Cas after the Gadreel possession reveal (he goes on to take the Mark of Cain in the following episode, and has it the rest of the season through season 10 finale). That is brilliant and accurate and I BOW DOWN in humility to that parallel.  I now love this scene a billion times more. *single [wo]man tear*   Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this little trip down memory lane, thanks as always for getting through my rambling,  and HAPPY FACE CUPPING FOREVER.

[ashtonq247]

Kaminari Denki headcannons!!

Bc it’s his bday and I love him (this will not cover his fam bc I switch between backstories with him so much that I just have no clue)

Buckle up bc this is a very long post I did not mean to get this deep lol

Let’s start with the most obvious- he makes friends easily, but I’m not just talking other students, I’m also talking the staff. This boy makes friends with the janitors and the lunch ladies and even the teachers!! He also makes friends with the security bots and pranks them a lot

This stems from him wanting ppl to like him. I think this bc of the fact that his character sheet says he likes all things “trendy” - I think he rlly wants to be known as the cool guy bc he is rlly insecure of himself

And as much as I think he is very trendy, I also think he is a big literature nerd! I believe he is more likely to listen to audio books tho, but I’m not entirely 100% sure though. He tries to keep this underwrap, but eventually he does join momo’s book club and brings completely different analysis to the table :D

He is just generally into the arts (we see this in cannon- he plays guitar, is seen drawing Aizawa, references Hemingway) so I see him as a more creative guy rather than a logically minded dude

This boy has adhd, anxiety, and dyslexia and dyscalcula (he was able to work through dyslexia bc he read so much, but still has problems with his dyscalcula) and this causes issues for him in school. He also a HUGE procrastinator. He often feels stupid and dumb bc if it (also doesn’t help that even his friends joke abt it too, but as long as it’s just a joke he shouldn’t make a big deal abt it right??)

I say he has anxiety because of the way he reacts to when he is training- always panicking and frying his brain. I think what stans between him and being rlly op is his anxiety and view of himself

Speaking of him frying his brain, I headcannon he has litchenburg figures, which if u don’t know r these rlly cool scars that look kinda like branches with what kinda looks like flowers so cool tbh, and BEFORE u say “he obviously doesn’t have them cannonly” let me just say that his quirk affects his brain cannonly!! It’s not weird for it to also affect his skin!!! I think he might have had litchenburg figures if they were more commonly known as it is a very cool thing tbh

I also think that bc his brain gets impacted by his quirk, sometimes his nerves get impacted too. This means he sometimes can’t taste food (and he doesn’t eat it when he can’t taste it, which pisses Bakugo off) and he also can’t feel things as well (I believe the class figures this out after Denki went to poor himself some tea but didn’t know the kettle was still rlly hot and so he grabbed it not knowing he was burning himself until he handed it over to someone who then dropped the pot bc it was so hot- needles to say he had to go to recovery girl that day)

He has never been to the aquarium bc as a child he had terrible control over his quirk and that made ppl nervous to put him near water (he goes as a teen with the bakusquad and is absolutely floored- his favorite creatures are of course all the sting rays, jelly fish, and electric eel- cue bakusquad comparing him to the brainless jellyfish)

He also doesn’t know how to swim till he was in middle school (once he was in better control of his quirk he went out and learned to swim on his own bc he had to learn how if he wanted to be a hero u know? He never quit got the hang of it tho)

Storms make him very energized and his already low ability to focus worsens. Prone to accidentally zapping ppl. He mostly stays in his room when storms happen bc he doesn’t want to hurt ppl/ wreck electronics on accident. He doesn’t even get to chat with friends on the phone bc he would wreck it so storms get rlly lonely :(

Also is basically a lightning rod. It hurts bc of how forceful it is, but it’s also not that big of a deal to him

Is prtty forgetful unfortunately due to all the times he fried his brain. It’s something he really tries not to think about

He probs can’t sleep very easily due to all his energy

He hates frying his brain bc it’s very hard to understand what’s going on when he does. Everything is a lot more sluggish and things are simultaneously way too much and he gets hyper sensitive and at the same time his senses are also very groggy and weird. It’s over all a bad time, but he got used to it

Whenever he fried his brain instead of being all wheyyy and thumbs upy he use to act more vegetative which rlly freaked ppl out so he eventually learned to get to where he is now when he fries his brain

Kids use to take advantage of his whey mode and do pranks on him which often got him hurt, but he never rlly felt it at first so he didn’t mind to bad. As long it was just joking and they were having fun right??

Time for happy ones!! His favorite foods (besides burgers, those r his favorite cannonly) all have some coralation with memes (speggeti tacos, mac n cheese, “chonky” milk, chicken nuggy, etc)

He is a meme lord yes

Stans pikachu (obvi)

U cannot convince me that he doesn’t paint his nails black, maybe with a little lightning bolt on his middle finger. This boy cannonly wears a choker common

He does face masks with Mina!! I believe he cares abt his looks greatly, and does beauty routines with Mina all the time. I’m constantly switching btween wether or not he owns it, or is a bit insecure and tries not to show this side to much to the boys

Why does this show not give him skinny jeans?? I mean common his entire style calls for skinny jeans. Maybe it’s Japan fashion or smth bc if it was in America he’d have skinny jeans bc it’s the trendy thing u know

Cannot cook. Can barely work the microwave. Claims unmarked food and eats it at midnight

Has a lot of weird info stored in his brain- how weather works, psychology stuff, weird facts abt bees, etc- that he learns randomly, never rlly trying to learn them but it sort of just happens u know. This frustrates Bakugo and jirou to no end bc he knows all these useless facts about how 1,200,000 mosquitos is all it takes for them to all at once drain a human of all their blood in a second, but not about how to work the pathagorean theorem

Idk why I think this (and it’s a popular headcannon too), but he knows at least 3/4 languages. It just suits him?? Bc he is a ppl person??? I don’t know??

Gets major test anxiety

Teachers either love him or hate him no in between. A lot of his elementary teachers absolutely hated him and would tear him down by calling him stupid and annoying. In middle school when he learns to control his quirk better, teachers rlly liked him- in the way that class clown trouble makers are liked by teachers. He may not excel in his class but he is a pretty funny dude.

He is constantly either underestimated or overestimated. Kaminari himself does this as well. It’s part of the issue with his hero training

Cats do not like him. They may like being petted bc if the static electricity, but when Kami pets cats he just absorbs the static- no pleasure :(((- or he accidentally has too much static electricity. If so then only tge rlly fluffy cats like him. Either case, shinsou finds a cat that likes kaminari as well and it is very cute :33

THE class prankster. Even on the teachers! The death glare Aizawa gave him on the one time prancing him worked is one kaminari will never forget (he still tries to prank him despite this lol)

Constantly teasing Bakugo as a way to press his buttons. It’s debatable on wether or not this helps bakugo’s anger issues

He is the wingman between Bakugo and Kirishima change my mind!!

Also mandatory kaminari is bisexual headcannon bc he rlly gives me those vibes. I think he doesn’t know yet that he’s bisexual, and when he thinks a fellow bro is hot he thinks he’s just admiring his bro u know. Maybe even thinks he is jealous. He does flirt with all genders tho mostly as a joke. He draws dicks as jokes but he always puts a little too much detail in them for him to rlly be straight

Can be used as a defibrillator as long as he can focus

Honestly there’s so much stuff kaminari has the potential to do with his quirk it’s a shame the manga/anime doesn’t use it

Like I rlly want to see him use his quirk in training to blow out all the lights in a building so he can use it for his advantage

That’d be badass

Also his quirk makes him very hard to be caught when their training. He can slip out of ppls grasp easily with a shock, and he also just has good reflexes in genral (I think this is cannon). Cue class 1-a running around trying and failing to catch him lol. Their best bet is to get him to fry his brain :(

He was popular in school before UA bc of his quirk and bc of how charming and easy to get a long with he is. This lead a lot of his friends to be very shallow. He didn’t rlly think about wether or not someone was trying to be his friend or not, he just liked being liked. This lead him to his whole liking trendy things, and he often felt that if he wasn’t seen as cool or funny his friends would all leave him. His whole rlly liking to talk thing caused a lot of ppl to think he was annoying at times, but he was never rlly able to lose that trait

The bakusquad was the first friend group he got rlly close too. He felt he can be himself around them and be the crackhead he was always meant to be. He still always concerned about wether they might leave him if he’s too annoying bc of anxiety but he’s getting better :)

He is a bringer of chaos and that’s part of his charm! Never dull with Denki around. He’s always doing the weirdest stuff, and ever since Mina, Kiri, and Sero, this has only doubled!

He is always calling Momo a genius (bc she is) and they are rlly good friends

Is an unofficial emo squad member (just look at his hero costume)

A sinnamon roll I’m srry but he ain’t a cinnamon roll. He has a dirty mind lol

Peepee jokes

Probably does tik tok dances I’m sorry

Nintendo fan for life

Xbox or PlayStation?- “Nintendo wut u mean”

Abbreviates so much it’s kinda hard to read,. Like if u thought I was bad this boy is soo much worse

It’s kinda ironic bc he has a very large vocabulary lol

He only uses it when he’s being sassy or very passionate

Mixes his gen z lingo with his big brain vicab to create atrocities of sentences

”bro the rise of the proletariat is lit tbh”

He is the worst to text with. He gives Bakugo aneurysms

Yeet yote to be yoted

3am shower thoughts

Unpopular opinion: i don’t think he likes weed. It probs reminds him too much of his whey mode

He’s a good strategist, but let’s the other team members think of the plans bc of insecurity, and otherwise his anxiety causes his smartness to shut down

Very good at zoning out. Sometimes he accidentally zones out so hard during class he misses the entire lesson and is only brought out bc of the school bell. Aizawa is best at snapping him out of it

Tbh I don’t think UA would be good with mental health. You’d think they’d hire a professional therapist or smth, but maybe it’s bc hero’s are so glorified ppl don’t ever think about these issues

I doubt the teachers had very good teacher training u know

We’ve mostly seen young heroes. I bet that’s bc they die so often, and if they don’t die in battle the mental health issues that stem from trauma and the media’s pressure are such an issue that it’s not uncommon for hero work to have high suicide rates

Anyway I’m starting to lose track of things thanks for coming to my ted talk I think I’ll stop here

[superemeralds]

OH WOW thank you for answering so fast!! I wanted to ask because in my opinion, Shadow is written kind of... poorly.. at the metal virus arc :c and I love how you characterize Shadow!! I was wondering, if you could, how would you have written him in it?

okay so this got. RAELLY long. it’s under the read more.. hhaaa... get ready for rambles.

before i start on what i would love to see different, here’s a few things that i really liked about his characterization in idw:

shadow being persistent about what he thinks is right, being very straightforward and strict in wanting to execute his ideal

the way he stepped down and let sonic try his way instead of being stubborn because sonic made a very good point. Shadow wants to be fair, and if he of all people deserves a chance, then so should eggman. kind of ties back to maria also, which is a nice nod to have considering it seems like modern writers for sonic usually treat the ending of shth as “ok she never existed to him anyways”

i like that he uses his GUN affiliation to his advantage to do good and help people (even if by rouges account he does it because he doesnt want to deal with zombots)

he has great devotion to make sure the truck is safe and peole get a chance to get out, giving (according to the comics anyways) more than 100% of his power dealing with hundreds if not thousands of zombots alone

I like that there’s a nod to shadow being insecure about his status as ultimate life form, and he is tempted to get infected just to prove to himself he really CANT get sick and he really IS a perfect being. He struggled a lot with the high expectations that were laid upon him, the expectations he’s laying upon himself.

I like how he had a great sense of shock and defeat when he realized that he DID get infected. It’s very true for him to be thrown off by it, get a little careless due to shock. its natural. it’s good.

his “i told you something like this would happen” towards sonic in the beginning of #19 is justified. He hates that he was right, he always is, and he wishes he wasnt. he could’ve prevented this, but its too late now. then later he risks getting infected with the metal virus, and he DOES get infected. He suddenly wasnt right anymore. This sense of irony... it’s probably one of the reasons he has trouble to concentrate on the fight. it’s a nice parallel. IDK if ian intended it to be this deep, but that’s what i read into it.

(i also want to point out that i like that herms gives everyone slightly diverse “skin”-tones. like diverse undertones. im still peeved they are all pretty pale but its hoenstly a nice little nod)

okay so here’s what i think could’ve gone better:

I feel like shadow being the one to drive the truck into the city is a reference to 06, where he is driving around in various vehicles. That in itself is nice, and i think shadow is a person who prefers to do things himself if there’s a lot at stake (which there was a lot of peoples lives) but i also think that he would think of himself as a powerful shield. He would rather be the one overseeing the battlefield insread of being the designated driver. He knows he was created for the frontlines, and he is someone who knows he can survive the front lines. He is not a sacrefice tobe made, he is the one who will make sure that no one else has to sacrefice themselves. Shadow should’ve been on site from the very beginning. Where is the rest of GUN anyways? Those low level humans should make an effort to protect the life on their planet.

Shadow did absolutely NOT use 100% of his pwoer to protect the truck. He could EASILY have done more. He can lift trucks. He could use chaos blast. He could easily have prevented just faling victim to the zombots so easily.

As mentioned above it kind of DOES make sense for him to go down easily due to being infected, but I think this was the wrong time to let him get infected. I think he wouldn’t let his guard down and carelessly touch a zombot. He would not give in to the temptation to test his limits like this if there was not a greater cause. I think he would easily break if someone he cared about (other than sonic) fell victim to the metal virus. This is something that would get him emotional, to get careless. He knows sonic can outrun the virus, but rouge can’t. Amy, Tails, Knuckles, Vector, all of Sonic’s friends can’t outrun the virus. There’s a big chance that he is immune, there’s a slim chance he is not. But even with that slim chance, he knows he could outrun it, just like sonic. Losing someone he cares about to the virus would remind him of his superiority, of how fragile life is and of his responsibility to protect life itself. Any restrait would be gone. He would be driven by guilt and anger at himself, that he could’ve done better, that he HAS to do better. It’s something that spirals him totally out of control. It’s something that would make him want to prove to himself that he has the ability to fix it all. because it’s all his fault.

this is honestly something that is so important. he feels responsible for this, because he did what was right and gave sonic and eggman a chance. In his mind, sometimes the right hting to do is the wrong thing to do, because sometimes only wrong actions get you to the right goal. he is a gray character like that, and i think it’s not shown enough. his regret and guilt don’t surface enough so that anyone who is not as invested in the character would be able to read it out of #19. there’s a lot of stuff going on inside shadow in this issue and its just. not enough time to unpack it all. this whole deal of him getting infected was too rushed. (as mentioned above i wouldve preferred he get infected a little later or under other circumstances)

I think shadow is aware of his responsibility as living weapon to not fall into the hands of the enemy. he has learned what it means to be manipulated, he learned what it means if he was used as a weapon by an enemy of life on earth. he does NOT want to be used as an object of destruction ever again. He would RUN. even if hesitant, but his emotions would make him excell even in that. he would make sure he’d run faster than sonic. he’s want to make sure that he’d give 110% and cure himself, something sonic couldn’t do.

the way he would go down in my mind is him excerting himself. He would absolutely reject help. he would prefer to not have any contact with anyone at all. For one because he feels guilty and he doesn’t want to deal with that emotionally, also because he doesn’t want anyone to see him in this state of weakness. He absolutely would loathe the idea of anyone being able to see him go down and surrender to the enemy. He would absolutely exhaust his entire energy reservoir building barricades and being the sole and only front line protecting evacuation efforts from a distance, to make sure that they have enough buffer to escape, should he fail.

shadow is someone  who is rash and has a tendency to boast his strength, but he also is someone who tries to consider any and all possibilities, no matter how painful they are to admit to his pride. he will shove them to the back of his mind, but they are still there. and if it COMES to those scenarios, he will have a plan for them. only if unpredictable things happen, or things that shake him emotionally, he would lose grip.

also in all those talks abt things shaking him emotionally, i dont mean that other people who arent his friends are not important to him, its just that friendship has a bigger impact on people. i think that should be pretty obvious, but since people like to misinterpret shadow id like to make sure people understand that i think that shadow values all and every life on the planet. he griefs over random deaths as much as his friends, it’s just that it hits more personal. mostly because he thinks... of himself as someone who always protects, but never has to be protected.

shadows relationship with himself is complicated. he thinks very low of himself. he pretty much hates himself. but that is because he thinks oh so highly of himself. he is perfect, ultimate, unbeatable, unstoppable, immortal, immune.... he expects all this of himself... even though he knows that it’s not true. it’s the one thing that he knows of himself. The one thing he feels that he could maybe achieve if he tried hard enough, and of course he is never trying hard enough; and at the same time he is trying so hard. He gives 300% and yet he still feels like he halfasses everything and he still feels like he could do better. On the outside he presents it with his strict edgy persona, that looks down on everyone. but really he feels so small. most of all towards sonic. sonic is so so tall compared to shadow (pun intended).

he looks up to sonic so much, because he always manages to go out of hisway to do what is right. even if it meant risk, even if it meant weakness. Sonic, the guy that easily could just get killed and hurt and not recover. the funny jokes dude that never thinks more than a single step ahead. This boy is out there risking his life for the life of this planet on the front lines and he shows not a single care about his own safety, always putting everyone else before him. shadow envies him. he really really does. thats why he values his opinoin. thats why he listens to him and even steps back from his OWN ideals, something he would do for only VERY few people, because of course shadow is always right. this is referenced in various sonic games (sa2 most of all,shth,sth) and in sonic x (yea its not canon but like. They Really Got His Character).

ADDING SOME RAMBLING AFTER ISSUE #33 RELEASED

[multisuperfandom]

I’ll be your teacher

Part 1 of The True Omega series

Pairing: Scott McCall x reader

Warnings: angst, language, mentions of neglect, unrequited love, loneliness, depression

Summary: You’ve known him almost your entire life. You were close enough to call acquaintances, but not nearly close enough to be called friends. Then again, you weren’t close enough with anyone to call them friends. You were an omega. The absolute definition of an omega. Being born out of an affair, your mother, one of the greatest alphas ever seen, Talia Hale, rejected you. Your father, her former emissary, and almost all of your half siblings hated you for it. You ran away from Beacon Hills when you were 13, after the abuse you had gotten from your father became too much. But the news of an alpha in your home town has lured you back. An alpha comes with a pack, and now the boy you were never close enough with, is a freshly bitten beta. Now you are stuck between a rock and a hard place. Between helping the boy you always wanted to be friends with, and finally having a pack. What will you do?

Word count: 1k 

Tags: @nostalthicc

~~~~~~~~

Beacon Hills. You had so many mixed feelings about Beacon Hills. On one hand, it’s your home. It’s where you grew up and became the person you are today. On the other hand, Beacon Hills was where you first learned the hardest lessons in life, where you were the loneliest, the saddest.

You shouldn’t have come back. You knew that long before you ever even thought about coming to California. But the part of you that craves a pack, that craves a connection, dragged you here.

You had a routine in New York. You had a life. You had an apartment. You were a waitress at a small, terrible diner that you were pretty sure was a cover for a mafia scheme, but it was a job. You didn’t have any parents to listen to, any siblings to survive. You’re only responsibility was paying the bills. No people that needed you. No one that cared about you.

But that was the problem.

Now you were sitting in chemistry class, staring at the equation on the board, trying to not die from boredom. Chemistry and science wasn’t your thing. School wasn’t your thing. It bored you. So, why were you here?

To fulfill a childhood hope of yours. Scott McCall and Stiles Stilinski. Mainly Scott McCall.

Growing up, you were always in their class, all the way up until you ran away. You had talked to them, helped them with their school work. You even impressed them with your knowledge of basically anything, but they never wanted to be your friend or show you any attention. After a while, you got used to it. No one ever wanted you, so what’s two more names added to the list, right?

But the seven-year-old little girl in you wanted to at least try.

“Dude, you made first line?” You hear a voice in front of you ask.

“I told you, man, this year is my year,” another voice-Scott McCall, himself-replies before looking across the classroom at someone. Allison Argent. The seven-year-old girl in you hates that. Allison’s family has tried to kill you several times, each meeting you barely made it out. But that’s not why you hate it. You hate it because of this stupid, pathetic crush you’ve harbored for Scott since the 3rd grade. It was completely crazy but you couldn’t stand to see him want her. Not when you’ve wanted him for so long.

“Are you coming to the game tomorrow?” The first voice -Stiles- ask. There’s silence for a moment before you realize he’s talking to you. Lifting your head, you see both boys staring at you.

“Of course,” you say shortly, before silently cursing yourself.

“It’s gonna be my first game,” Scott says, giving you a small smile.

“I would say good luck but you’re gonna do great out there.”

“McCall, Stilinski, Locks, do I need to separate you?” The teacher calls.

“No, sir,” the three of you say in unison.

You look at Scott once silence gathers among the students and the teacher starts talking. His scent changed a couple of days ago, and for a while, you couldn’t figure out why. Because of your weakened senses, it was hard for you to tell that he was bitten by the same alpha that brought you here. But now you clearly tell the difference in him.

This could be really good or really bad. This could be your first-class ticket to the pack you’ve always wanted or a first-class ticket to the afterlife.

~~~~~~~~~~

“You shouldn’t have come back.” Derek paces the floors of his old, burnt house.

“You came back,” You mutter before receiving a glare from your half brother.

“It’s dangerous here.”

“It’s dangerous everywhere for an omega!” Derek gives you a sympathetic look. You hate that look. You hate pity and everything that comes with it.

“Y/N-“

“You don’t get it, Derek! Laura rejected me! Mom rejected me!” You scream, your face turning red but you don’t care. There things you’ve been needing to say to him since you were 13. “I’ve been alone my entire life! You’ve had a pack, you’ve had teachers to teach you control. You wanna know how I learned? By sneaking into that fucking backyard and watching mom teach Laura! That’s how I learned!”

“Y/N,” he stops himself halfway, tilting his head slightly. For as long as you’ve known Derek, you’ve gotten to learn what he does when his certain senses are working.

“You hear something, don’t you?” You ask, grabbing his arm. He shakes you off and starts walking out the front door.

“Wait here.” Even though you don’t want to, you follow his instructions, staying almost completely still. But the waiting gets to be too much and you walk outside to stand behind Derek.

“I told you to stay inside,” he snarls at you, grabbing your arm but you shrug him off as he did to you.

“Maison?” The boy that Derek was talking to asks. You almost don’t respond before you remember that the name you’ve been called since you got back was Maison Locks. There was no way to know how many people knew that Y/N L/N was the love child of Talia Hale and F/N L/N. It was safer to be Maison Locks until you find out who the alpha is.

“Scott, what are you doing here?” You ask the boy that you have always secretly wanted to notice you. He never did, not until you came back a month ago. Now he and Stiles Stilinski talk to you in English and chemistry. But he doesn’t remember you from before, he just knows you as Maison.

“I just offered to teach him how to control the shift,” Derek says from the steps of the house. Your feet have worked on their own and now you are standing face to face with Scott McCall.

“I wouldn’t say yes,” you whisper in his ear so that Derek wouldn’t hear. You catch yourself saying these things, partly for payback, partly to spend some time with the boy. “He’s not the best teacher. Short-temper and all.”

“How am I supposed to learn how not to shift and almost murder Allison then?” Allison. You forgot about Allison. Of course, this is about Allison. “Or play lacrosse without hurting someone?”

“I can teach you,” you whisper again, less eager this time. This stupid crush of yours is interfering with your mind. Originally, you were just gonna come and find the alpha. Now you are a sophomore at Beacon Hills High School, only because you saw Scott at the grocery store. How are you supposed to find the alpha if you are teaching a new beta how to control himself. But you can’t stop yourself. All you have ever wanted was to have friends and people to depend on. Whether that was a pack or a group of friends. And you always wanted to be his friend.

“You can teach me?”

“I can, I’m an excellent teacher.” That was not a complete lie but it wasn’t also the truth. No one has ever cared enough about you to talk to you for more than ten minutes, much less have you teach them anything. So you taught yourself, maybe you will be a horrible teacher.

“You’re a werewolf?” He asks hesitantly. Nodding, you look up at him with your glowing blue eyes.

“Ok, ok,” he nods before taking a step back. You try to ignore the familiar aching pain in your heart. You tell yourself you’re used to it. Why would anyone want to be close to the omega? Except for your father, but you’re quick to push the thought of. Thoughts like that make controlling yourself hard.

“We’ll start tomorrow,” you say with a small smile. Turning and walking away, your smile grows to a large grin when you see Derek. Hearing crunching of leaves, you know that Scott has left and you are free to speak freely with Derek.

But when you step onto the stairs, he grabs your arm roughly, pulling you close. “That was a stupid move, omega.” His blue eyes looking at you in a way you’ve never seen them look at you. Like he hates you too. “How would an omega teach anyone, anything?”

Your strength surprises him and you when you yank your arm from his hold. Your own blue eyes echoed back to his. You’re angry, no beyond angry. For your entire life, everyone has always told you how worthless and unwanted you are. But never Derek. Never your brother, who always said how much he cared about you and wanted to protect you. But this, this isn’t him caring about you, this is him trying to dominate you. And you won’t have it.

“No, Derek, the stupid move was you thinking that you can treat me like a worthless omega.” You back away from him, shaking your head. You want to escape this. Escape the emotions you are feeling, the sadness, the loneliness, the anger. You want to leave it all. “Born werewolves are taught that we can rise and fall through the ranks. How fucking untrue is that? Once you’re an omega, you will always stay an omega.”

“That’s not true, Y/N.” He tries to get close to you, but you keep stepping back, away from him.

“No? What alpha wants another alpha’s trash? Their unwanted, worthless scum that doesn’t deserve a pack?” You keep talking, trying to push away the tears. “I just thought you were different than the rest.”

And then you were gone, gone from the emotions, from the man you thought was your brother, gone from this hurting.

~~~~~~~~

Because you watched your mother teach Laura, you learned more than just control. You are an evolved werewolf, just like your mother and Laura were.

Not many people know. You weren’t even sure if Derek knew, but it didn’t matter. Nothing else mattered right now, then getting home.

You should’ve driven, especially if the Argents are patrolling the woods. But you’re faster as a wolf; stronger, more in tune with your senses. You figured that you were safer running through the woods as a wolf than driving down the highway in your car.  

But now every noise you hear is scaring you. Every snap of a branch, every call of an owl. You aren’t safe. Your senses are in hyperdrive. Something’s coming. You need to get out of the woods.

You used to know every inch of this town. Every crack on the sidewalk. Every route to get to places. But two years away from Beacon Hills has interrupted your mind’s map of the small town. The panic that is rushing through your veins doesn’t help at all.

Where is the closest business or building that I can go to? You think.  

Come on! think, Y/N, think!

I am on the edge of the woods. I’ve been running north since I left Derek.

Where am I?

What am I near?

Your heart pounds in your ear. The sounds of your breathing fill the air, and you begin the wonder if whatever is after you can hear it too. You need to think and think quickly.

Deaton.

~~~~~~~

You pound on the door, soaking wet from the rain that at some point began falling. You’re shaking, whether that from fear or the cold, you can’t tell.

Come on, Deaton. Open up, you plead in your mind.

The door opens slowly and you release a breath that you didn’t know you were holding.

“Maison?” The person that opened the door asks. It was definitely not Deaton.

“Scott?” You whisper. Your senses are weaker in your human form and that scares you more than anything. “Can I come in?”

He nods and widens the door for you. Giving him a gentle smile, you step into the veterinarian clinic. You had seen your mother and other alphas coming here so many times. This place, in your mind, had always meant safety. Deaton had probably patched up more of your wounds than you cared to admit.

“What are you doing here?” Scott asks, interrupting your train of thought.

You suddenly become very interested in your hands. “I was scared.”

“Of what?”

“I don’t know.” It was embarrassing to admit. It made you seem weak, and you hated being seen as weak.

“Was it hunters?” He asks, kneeling to be face to face with you. He was kind, you knew that about him already but he surprised you with just how kind he was. He wasn’t treating you like a pathetic child whose afraid of the dark. He actually wants to know what was scaring you.

“I don’t know.”

“Well, I have my mom’s car for the next couple of hours. Do you want me to take you home once I close up?” you nod.

Scott smiles at you before standing up and cleaning up the clinic. You watch him move, watch the way he glides through the room. You had never met someone who was like him or someone you liked as much as you like him. You probably won’t ever.

“Ready to go?”

“Yeah.”

[bluezey]

Inside Onward - Bold Fail

Second chapter of the Onward/Inside Out mashup.  It’s a little longer, but that’s because I wanted to end it on a cliffhanger rather than a bummer.  Speaking of bummers, I’m really starting to feel bad for Ian’s Fear right about now.

The morning just got started and the shelves of short term memory were filling up with colorful glowing orbs, each playing a short vision of the memory Ian experienced.  Yellow, blue, red, green and purple.  Arguably, a little more purple than the other colors. Fear was finishing jotting down some notes in his notebook before he looked up, checking on the other emotions.

Joy was nearby the console, sitting on the couch with his arms and legs stretched out, watching the screen as Ian was in line at Burger Shire.  Sadness, Disgust and Anger were by the console discussing what Ian should order for breakfast.  Anger wore his red flannel shirt unbuttoned and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Disgust was the only emotion that tucked in his flannel shirt, and he had a comb and compact mirror in the chest pocket of his shirt.  Sadness’s clothes had creases and wrinkles from the many times he lie around moping, and one extra button undone at the top of his flannel shirt.

“We can’t order a HuzzahMlet,” Disgust argued to Anger.  “It’s too messy, and Ian would have to eat it with a knife and fork.  He needs something quick to eat, like one of those breakfast sandwiches.”

Anger mumbled, “Fine. But whatever we get better have dragon bacon on it.”

Joy jumped up from his seat with glee as he added, “Ooh, get hash bites!  Those are so good.  And coffee!”

“Not too hot, though,” Fear warned as he approached the console, feeling needed.  “We don’t want Ian to burn his lips.  And he likes it-“

“Black with three or four packets of sugar,” the other emotions echoed Fear, knowing Ian just as much as he does.

Fear squeezed in at the center of the group, looking up at the screen as Ian took his receipt from the coworker behind the register.  Fear took the controls, Ian turned and sat down on a bench across from the counter. Smartphone Island lit up as Ian began to reach into his pocket for his smart phone, when Ian’s ear caught someone speaking to him from the next seat over, causing the island to go quiet.

“Hey.  Go griffins.”

Ian looked up.  “What?”

“You go to Willowdale College?” the friendly stranger asked, motioning to Ian’s sweatshirt.

Ian looked down and gave a slight laugh.  “Oh, no. This was my dad’s.”

Fear blinked, he didn’t touch the console.  He took a double take when he caught Joy at the controls.  “Joy!  We can’t talk to strangers!”

“Fear, Ian’s sixteen, not six,” she commented, believing Fear’s over protectiveness was genuinely a joke.  The other emotions didn’t think so, with Anger quietly shaking his head and Disgust rubbing his temples.

The friendly stranger noticed the name stitched onto Ian’s sweatshirt.  “Lightfoot?  Wilden Lightfoot?”

“Uh, yeah,” Ian replied.

The friendly stranger’s face lit up.  “I went to college with him.”

“No way.”  Ian smiled.  The emotions caught sight of Dad Island whirring to life.

Joy looked at Fear with an encouraging smile.  “See? It all worked out.”

“Yeah.”  The college friend’s face turned to sorrow.  “Boy, I was so sorry to hear that he passed away.”

Ian’s face fell into a grief filled frown as well.  “Yeah… thanks,” he said softly.

Fear looked to Sadness, then back at Joy.  “Nice going,” he couldn’t help but comment.

“Yeah, your dad,” the college friend continued, “he was a great guy, so confident.  When he entered a room, everyone noticed.”  He chuckled before adding, “You know, he wore the ugliest pair of purple socks every single day.”

Ian laughed to himself from learning such a thing.  “What? Why?”

“We asked him the same thing,” the college friend explained.  “But your dad, he was just bold.  I wish I had that kind of confidence in me.”

“Yeah.” Ian grew a little excited from learning something new about his dad.  “Wow, I’ve never heard anything about this before.  Do you know any-?”

The college friend interrupted.  “Oh, looks like it’s time to take this kid to school.”

Ian turned, catching sight of a young boy holding up a carry out bag.  The emotions excitement instantly fell, realizing their conversation about Ian’s dad was over.  Fear looked over his shoulder as Dad Island dimmed and grew silent again.

“It was nice meeting you,” the college friend said, holding out his hand.

Ian took it and gave it a gentle, friendly handshake.  “Yeah, you too.”  As the college friend left with his son, Ian looked down at the Lightfoot name on his sweatshirt.  “Bold,” he thought under his breath, feeling inspired.

Fear turned back, nodding to himself in agreement.  “Bold…”

----

Disgust pointed to a green bench in front of the school.  “That one.  Check it before he sits down, I don’t want Ian sitting in unicorn poop again.”

“That only happened twice,” Joy tried to wave off.

“Guys,” Fear announced as he took out his notepad and pen, “I got a great idea to change Ian’s sixteenth birthday around.  Let’s make a list of things we can do to make Ian the new Ian.”

“You got that idea from mom,” Anger argued.

“Doesn’t matter,” Fear commented.  “School starts in ten minutes, so let’s get thinking.”

Ian took a sip of his coffee before pulling out a small notebook from his back pocket.  He flipped it open to an empty page and wrote down in black ink ‘The New Me’

“How about we have Ian speak up more,” Sadness softly suggested.

“Excellent idea, Sadness,” Fear commented, writing the note down under his own list titled ‘The New Iandore.’

Joy pressed a button, Ian wrote down on his list ‘Speak up more.’

“Ian can’t be sixteen and not have his driving permit,” Anger said bluntly.  “That’s not fair.”

“Learn to drive,” Fear said, writing it down, his hand shaking a bit.  Ian wrote down ‘Learn to drive’ on his list as well.

“He needs friends,” Disgust pointed out.  “We need people for his party.”

Ian wrote down ‘Invite people to party,’ and so did Fear.

“Oh!  Oh!  I got one!” Joy jumped up and down, bursting with excitement over a brilliant idea.  Instead of explaining it, Joy flicked a few switches and levers on the console.  Fear watched the screen cautiously, wondering what Joy just did.

Ian added to the list in bold words ‘Be like dad.’

The other emotions gently praised Joy for the idea.  A small smile gradually spread on Fear’s face before he added it onto his list as well.

The school bell rang through the air outside.  Ian put his notebook away, placed his backpack over his shoulders and tossed his breakfast trash and leftovers into the garbage by the bench.

“Okay gang, that’s first bell,” Fear told the other emotions as he took the lead.  “Let’s get in there before the tardy bell rings and show the world the new Iandore Lightfoot!”

Ian looked up at the two story school building, the concrete structure looking dominating and intimidating as it casted it’s darkened shadow over the teenage elf standing at the foot of the stairs leading inside.

Fear tried desperately to swallow that ball of anxieties tensing up in his throat.

----

Ian made his way down the hall to the doorway of his classroom, but stopped as he looked inside. There was the usual sight of the teacher prepping her notes and kids doing random things at their desks besides school work.  At the front was Ian’s empty seat, and behind him was that usual troll, resting his thick sweaty feet on the back of his chair.

“Him again?”  Disgust gagged.  “Ugh, I’m gonna be sick.”

“This is good,” Joy said, trying to spin things into a positive.  “We can use this experience to have Ian speak up for himself.”

“I got this,” Anger declared, cracking his knuckles.

“No no no no!” Fear immediately placed a hand between Anger and the console.  Anger glared up at Fear.

“Fear’s right, we don’t need to be mean.  Let’s try just asking him.”  Joy pressed a button on the console.

Ian approached his desk and cleared his throat quietly.  “Hey, do you mind not putting your feet up on my chair today?”

“Sorry dude, the troll replied, lazily keeping his attention on his smart phone.  “Got to keep my feet elevated.  Helps get blood flow to the brain.”

Joy shrugged and pressed two more buttons.  Fear looked back up at the screen, anxiety beginning to creep up his spine and tightly curl his purple nerve into his blue hair.

“Yeah, but it’s hard for me to get into my seat with your feet up like that,” Ian tried again.

“Well, if I can’t think, I’m gonna do poor in school,” the troll replied, more argumentative.  He glanced up from his phone and eyed Ian. “You don’t want me to do bad at school, do you?”

That shift in tone and stare was enough for Fear to step in.  “It’s not working.  It’s not working!”  He pushed Joy aside as he slammed his hand down on the console.

“Uh, well… okay,” Ian mumbled off as he tried to squeeze in, giving a defeated sigh.

Disgust covered his mouth as he ran off to throw up.  Anger and Sadness eyed Fear, while Joy looked at him shocked and confused.  All Fear could do is stand there, tucking his hands under his arms.

----

It was afternoon, and Ian was in the back of a small group of students at a driving school near the high school.

“Okay, let’s not screw this up guys,” Disgust told the other emotions.

“Ian’s logged in plenty of hours with mom and her car,” Joy said optimistically, “he’s got this.” Joy glanced over at Fear, his arms beginning to tremble as he stared blankly up at the screen.  “Right, Fear?”

“Huh?” Fear snapped out of it and fumbled with his sweatshirt.  “Oh, right, right.”

“Driving test,” the driving instructor announced in her gravely gremlin tone.  “Any volunteers?”

Anger slammed his fist down on a button.  Ian’s hand shot up defiantly.

Before long, Ian was behind the wheel of one of the vehicles on loan from the driving school.  He took a deep breath, trying to keep his composure, and it was working so far.  Until he looked up at the highway before turning onto the onramp.

Sadness glanced over as he saw Fear walking up next to Anger.  While Anger was at the controls, helping Ian stay focused, Fear kept his eyes on the screen, placing one hand on the edge of the console.

At the top of the onramp, Ian glanced over his shoulder.  The cars sped by at a speed much too fast for Fear to comprehend, causing him to shiver.

“Just merge into traffic,” the driving teacher instructed.

“Yeah, in a minute,” Ian nearly sputtered, trying to focus on the road.

Anger growled, trying to find a gap in the traffic for Ian to merge into.  He was defiant to get this done, but was struggling as Ian seemed to veer out faster than Anger could let him veer in.  “What’s wrong with this kid?” Anger spat, not knowing Fear now has both hands on the console, gripping the edge tightly.

“Just merge into traffic!” the instructor now shouted.

Fear’s instincts kicked in. “ABORT!!” he ordered as he grabbed the controls, causing Anger to back away.

“I’m not ready!” Ian shouted.

“Pull over,” the instructor told Ian.

“Oh come on!” Anger snapped, storming off.

“Fear, what was that?” Disgust snapped at him.

Joy stepped between them. “That- that- that- that, was, uhmm… yeah, we’ll try again next time,” he said, running out of excuses.

Fear couldn’t hear them as he saw the driving instructor write something down on her notepad. Seeing the failure get written down in Ian’s files just made Fear hang his head.

----

The final bell rang, the students filtered out to the front of the school.  While many began to leave either by ride, by bus, or by walking, some stayed behind.  A few students were some members of the science club, chatting away at the entrance of the school.  Ian just tried to casually stand on the sidewalk nearby, alone.

“Okay gang, third time’s the charm,” Joy cheered, trying to boost everyone’s downbeat spirits.  “We can still turn this day around if we get some guests for Ian’s party.  Disgust?”

“I got this.  Follow my lead.”  Disgust took the lead at the controls, with Joy assisting.  Outside, Ian was thinking out loud what to say, jotting down key words for his prepared invitation on his hand.  Figuring out what Disgust was planning, Fear stood up from his seat on the couch, took out his notebook and made some notes of his own.

“No Joy, no one says dudes anymore,” Disgust corrected.  “Try gang.”

“Got it.” Joy flipped a switch or two on the console, a yellow memory orb rolled out into short term memory with a vision of the notes on Ian’s hand.  “Okay, let’s do this!”

“And you,” Disgust snapped her attention to Fear, “stay back.”

“Disgust!” Joy exclaimed in shock.

“Whatever.”  Disgust took over at the console.

Ian walked up to the students, trying to remain calm and friendly.  “Hey, what’s up gang?” he greeted them, getting their attention.

“Oh, uh, Ian, right?” one asked.

Ian was a little surprised by that.  “Oh, I didn’t know you knew my… anyway…”  Ian looked down at his hand.  He froze when he realized it was glossy from sweating nervously, causing the notes on his hand to smear into an incoherent mess of ink.

“Wait, what happened?” Joy asked aloud.

Disgust glared at Fear, he stepped back.  “I-it wasn’t me!” Fear replied, scared of the outcome without himself at the controls.

“It’s that stupid social anxiety thing again!” Disgust snapped, racing to the short term memory shelves.

“I thought the mind workers fixed that glitch!” Anger shouted in frustration.

“You can’t fix anxiety,” Sadness commented as Disgust loaded the yellow memory orb into the recall playback. The memory of Ian’s notes on his hands appeared onscreen, but the image was blurred to the point that it was illegible.

“Ugh, focus, Ian, focus,” Disgust thought aloud as she tried adjusting the memory orb.

“Anger, don’t smack it!” Joy shouted as she and Sadness ran over to help Disgust.

The console was unmanned, or unemotioned.  This was Fear’s chance!  He took out his notepad as he took his spot at the controls.

Ian immediately wrapped his sweaty hands to his side, not only to hide them, but to remain calm. It wasn’t working, however, as words seemed to fail him at the moment.  “Uh, if you like parties… I was going to do a party- I mean, if you’re not doing anything tonight, and it’s okay if you are, and if you like cake, like I like cake, I have a cake… over, at my house?”

“Are you inviting us to a party?” the classmate asked.

“That’s the one,” Ian replied.

“Fear, get away from that console!!” Disgust shouted.  Fear shrieked as he pulled his arms away and wrapped them around his sides.  The emotions raced up to the console, Disgust watching in horror, then rage, when a few purple memories rolled into short term. “Ugh, Fear, you ruined everything!”

“Sure, we don’t have any plans,” the classmate told Ian with a polite smile.

The emotions watched as the other classmates nodded and agreed to the awkward invitation.  Fear gave a sigh of relief, his hands falling to his sides.  Joy couldn’t help but give a told you so smirk to Disgust.  “See, Fear’s got this.  And he got people to Ian’s party.  What could happen?”

The oncoming sound of loud rock music and roaring engine coming in fast was enough to make Joy freeze up.  Realizing that familiar sound, Fear went back into panic mode.  “No no no no no no no…”

“No no no no no,” Ian whispered, watching Barley’s van careen across the road.

“Ha ha!  Is that the birthday boy I see?”  The van came to a screeching halt by the sidewalk, right by Ian and the classmates.  Barley leaped out of the driver’s side, clad in that usual ridiculous Viking cosplay outfit he’s known to wear on some of his role playing game nights.  “Behold, your chariot awaits!” he bellowed.

“Just ignore him,” Disgust told the other emotions.  “Maybe he’ll go away.”

“That doesn’t work,” Sadness said.

“It better work this time,” Disgust snapped back.

“Sir Iandore of Lightfoot,” Barley called out, followed by blaring the van’s horn.

Anger roared furiously. “Ugh!  Just take the hint!” Disgust snarled.

“It’s okay!  I can handle this!”  Joy took control.

“Barley, hey,” Ian finally replied.  “We were just about to take the bus.”

“The bus?  Nae!” Barley triumphantly continued.  “I will give you and your companions transport upon Guinevere.”

“Uh, who’s Guinevere?” a student asked.

“My mighty steed.” Barley proudly placed his hand on his van.  The small vibration was enough for the front bumper to fall right off.  “Oh, that’s embarrassing,” he laughed off.

“No kidding,” Disgust replied sourly.

Joy glanced over at Fear, who was now squeezing his sides so tight he was creating creases in his sweatshirt.  He whimpered softly, worry causing him to begin buckling under the pressure.  “Now now, Joy tried to smooth things over. “It’s just Barley.  We can handle this.”

“You got something on your face,” a classmate pointed out, with a smile that was trying to hold back a chuckle or two.

Ian placed a hand on his face, trying to wipe off what it could be.  He pulled it back, only to realize it was the ink from his hand, and now it’s smeared all over his face.

Fear couldn’t take it anymore!  He pushed Joy out and he stepped in.

“You know, I just remembered, my birthday is, uh, cancelled,” Ian said quickly.  “Complete misunderstanding.  Gotta go. Bye.”  Ian quickened his pace towards the van, trying to get out of there as soon as possible.

Fear’s quickened breaths finally slowed.  He gradually looked to his left then his right, catching the gaze and glares of the other emotions.  He swallowed harshly before stepping back from the console.

“That’s it!” Anger began to march right up to Fear.

“No no no no no no!” Joy grabbed Anger and Disgust by their arms and ran off shouting out.  “Let’s have a meeting!  Emergency meeting!  Right now! Sadness, Fear, watch Ian please!” The three disappeared from sight as they ran into a short hallway into the break room.

Fear couldn’t help it as he ran that direction, slowing his steps until he stopped by the entrance to the hallway.  The break room had no door, so the three emotions were keeping their voices to a dull whisper.  But soon Fear could make out an angry and a disgusted voice commenting things like “he’s falling apart… he can’t take it anymore, I can’t take it anymore… he’s worthless… Ian’s better off without him…”  Sighing in defeat, Fear placed his back against the wall and slid down to a sitting position on the floor.

After Ian was seated in the van, Sadness looked over at Fear.  With Ian fine for a while, Sadness approached the purple emotion sprawled out on the floor.  “Hey… are you okay?”

“Yes… no…” Fear closed his eyes and rubbed them with his hands.  “I don’t know…”

“It’s okay to be sad,” Sadness told him.

“For you it is,” Fear almost snapped back, before recoiling back into a worried depression.  “Sorry, it’s just… a very bad day…”

Sadness nodded, he sat down next to Fear.  A moment or two of silence passed, Sadness sitting with his hands held at his sides, and Fear looking away from Sadness, keeping to his own pity.  Eventually, Sadness lowered his hands, placing one on Fear’s hand.  A soft sniffle caused Fear’s slender nose to scrunch up a tad, before a tear dropped from his eye.

“I’m not doing a good job lately,” Fear finally admitted to Sadness.  “Or… maybe I am… maybe I’m doing too good a job… I mean… I-I’m trying to do my part too, I’m trying to help Ian…”  Sadness nodded.  “I don’t know what’s gotten over me… things have gotten way too stressful for Ian, and now Joy told me you guys were talking about me behind my back…”

“Joy told you?” Sadness asked.

Fear immediately looked over at Sadness with shocked eyes.  “What did you say?”

Sadness confirmed, “You said Joy told you?”

“I said that?”  Fear took a double take as he heard the other emotions approaching.  He shifted so he was kneeling in front of Sadness.  “Don’t tell the others about this.”

“I-“

“Please please please.” Fear placed his hands together, begging.

Sadness nodded.  “Okay.”

“Thank you.”  Fear stood up, giving Sadness a hand up as well. “Let’s get back to the console before they see us.”

“See us doing what?”

“Shh!”

----

Ian dragged his feet across his bedroom floor, dropping his dad’s sweatshirt onto a hope chest next to his desk.  He flopped himself down at his desk, he took the small notebook out of his pocket. One by one, Ian crossed out the things on his list.  Speak up more.  Crossed out. Learn to drive.  Crossed out.  Invite people to party.  Crossed out. Be like dad…

Ian hesitated, but admitted defeat.  Crossed out.

Fear crossed out ‘be like dad’ on his list as well before sadly putting his notebook away.

The air in Headquarters was thick with silence and tension.  Joy, Sadness and Disgust watched the screen, while Fear hung his head, and Anger eyed Fear with a scowl.

“That’s it,” Anger finally spoke up.

“Anger,” Joy told him, “you promised we wouldn’t talk about this.”

“Well I am talking about it!” Anger spat.  He forcefully pointed a finger at Fear’s direction.  “This guy is nothing but trouble!”

“Finally,” Disgust rolled his eyes.

“He’s not trouble,” Joy said, trying to crack a joke.  “He’s a Fear.”

“He’s a menace!” Anger barked.  “We’re trying to do our jobs, and he keeps taking over!”

“Exactly!” Disgust snapped. “Ian can’t be Ian when he’s scared all the time!”

Fear backed away as they emotions stepped forward.  They were all in their argument, but appeared to be gaining up on him.  Anger and Disgust kept yelling, Joy kept trying to diffuse the fighting, Sadness could only get one word in once in a while before getting cut off.  It was building and building, piling on Fear, becoming too much.  He placed his hands under his arms and squeezed tightly, his nerve curled up until it was hidden in his blue hair.  He closed his eyes shut, trying not to listen, trying not to be there. But it just kept growing.

“STOOOOOOOP!!”

Fear finally opened his eyes to see the emotions staring at him in shock.  Did he… was he the one who said that?

A ping sounded.  Fear turned to see Dad Island lit up and active. The emotions turned to the screen. They watched as Ian pulled a small audio cassette out of his desk drawer labeled “Dad”

“Ian’s doing the thing again,” Sadness said.  The emotions approached the console, stood and watched.  They knew this ritual all too well.

Ian placed the cassette in the tape player and pressed play.  He rested his head onto his arms folded on his desk.  He listened.  Two voices on the tape.  One was muffled, but the familiar voice of his mom.  The other was clear as day, a voice that became familiar with each replay:

“… I think I got it… Hello? Hello?... Is that right?... Well, I’m trying to… ha ha ha, I know… Well, let’s find out… Okay, bye…”

The tape stopped. After a brief melancholy pause, Ian pressed rewind.

Joy smiled, looking like he was going to burst.  “I love this part.  This is my favorite part.”  The other emotions gave a little chuckle as they continued to watch.

Ian pressed play.  He lifted his head, looking up at the cork board on the wall in front of him, tacked on were a couple of old, random pictures of his dad that he found in storage around the house over the years. He looked at one with soft eyes, and a softer smile.  “Hi, dad.”

The tape replied.  “Hello?  Hello?”

“It’s me, Ian.”

“Is that right?”

“Yeah, right.  Did you have a good day?”

“Well, I’m trying to.”

“Yeah, me too.  Though I could clearly use some help.  Sure do wish I could spend a day with you sometime. There’s so much we could do.  It’ll be a lot of fun.”

“Well, let’s find out.”

“Yeah, I’d love to. We could-“

“Okay, bye.”  Click.

Ian’s face fell.  “Yeah… bye.”

The emotions smiled their usual melancholy smiles, with Sadness wiping away his usual tears.  They watched as Ian sat alone in his room, feeling alone.  But the emotions were reminded from Ian’s ritual their purpose.  Ian is never alone.  He has them, they are Ian.  Ian may not have a dad, and the emotions wished as hard as he did that he did. But the emotions will always be there to make Ian’s life as complete as possible.

Except, Fear was feeling something a little different today.  He glanced back at Dad Island, at the small display of pictures, replicas of the same pictures Ian had tacked to his cork board.  Dad was confident, dad was bold.  And Fear… he’s a Fear.  Fear gave an exhale as he shrugged his shoulders, feeling as lonely as Ian was in that very bedroom.

----

An hour passed.  Ian was in the living room, sewing up the popped seam on dad’s old sweatshirt.  Disgust was at the controls, Joy on one side of the console, Fear on the other, with Anger and Sadness sitting nearby on a couch.  Disgust was doing just fine, and Fear knew that.  But with each stitch, and that sewing needle, it looked so sharp, and Ian could prick his finger at any moment.

“I think-“ Fear began, but stopped when Disgust glared at him.  Fear hugged himself for a minute, before stepping forward towards the console. “But what if-“ Disgust held his hand out to stop him, and Anger growled.  Fear went back to placing his hands under his arms.

As Family Island lit up, Joy once again tried to cut the tension with a nice distraction.  “Oh look, it’s mom.”

Laurel sat down on the couch next to Ian.  “You must have learned from a sewing master,” she joked.

“Yeah, a very humble sewing master,” Ian replied, finishing the last stitch on the seam.  He put the needle and thread away.  Ian brushed a finger across the name Lightfoot, the emotions saw Dad Island light up.  “What was dad like, when he was my age?” Ian asked Laurel.  “Was he always super confident?”

“Oh, no,” Laurel replied. “It took him a while to figure out who he was.”

Ian looked down at nothing in particular.  “I wish I met him.”

“Me too.  But you know what?”  Laurel placed a comforting hand on Ian’s shoulder to get him to look back up. “When your dad got sick, he fought as hard as he could to see you more than anything.”

Ian just looked away, no response.  The emotions watched as his island of personality went dormant.  They looked at each other, just as speechless as Ian was, not knowing what to say, what to do.  Even Fear was at a loss.

“You know,” Laurel finally replied.  “I have something for you.  I was going to wait until after your cake, but I think you’ve waited long enough.”

Ian looked up curiously. “What is it?”

Laurel smiled, revealing her excitement after all these years.  “It’s a gift… from your dad.”

The emotions were in as big of a daze of wonder as Ian was.  Even Fear couldn’t believe his ears.  The purple emotion finally pushed that one word question out of his quivering lips. “… dad?”

[disaster-fruit]

and I know it's unfair because I haven't answered the ask yet but you're Brazilian so you know way more than me but I'd love to hear your thoughts about Imperial Brazil?? I'm really struggling with him bc i know about him in this era more from a portuguese perspective.....

YOU THOUGHT I WOULDN’T ANSWER THIS HUH 

Sorry for taking so damn long audshdf I was saving this ask to do a real deep dive into the whole empire with a lot of historical explanation and a lot of detail buuuut I was having some trouble coherently organizing my thoughts about Pedro II’s reign so instead I’m gonna use this ask to more loosely talk abt the first half of the empire. You’ve seen my basic thoughts on the second half on that other post, so now I’m gonna ramble mostly about 1808-1840.

Also, hm, this is LONG. It’s embarrassingly long. I hope you have time. 

And yes 1808-1822 is not part of the empire, but Brazil was no longer a colony in practice during those years, and I think they were crucial to his development as a person. 

Before 1808, Brazil pretty much grew up alone. His mother was around less and less, and he had no friends. Portugal was, as we already know, a shitty dad. Up to that point, he was not only absent but also very controlling. He never allowed Brazil or his people to learn how to read, Brazil wasn’t allowed to have libraries or universities or newspapers or even print. Portugal alienated Brazil both from his mother and from Port himself. He was forcefully kept from developing his own ideas, and his growth was stagnant – even physically. The way I see it, after 300 years he was still a small child, while the others around him were already growing into teenagers even though they were younger in actual numbers. Portugal literally kept him from developing as a person, by force. 

But suddenly, Portugal needed him. Suddenly, he showed up at his shore, with hundreds of people, and objects, and books. And though Portugal desperately needed Brazil at that time, his king couldn’t be there with Brazil being like that. That land with no cities and no libraries and no economy no nothing because he was forced to have nothing. 

He starts growing really, really fast, and forcefully again. And it was a painful process – his people were being kicked out of their houses so that the people that arrived from Portugal had where to live. In a few years, he grew almost as fast as humans did. But it was still an incomplete growth – most of his people were still living in misery, but now he had a structured state that allowed him to more firmly fit into what a nation means. But it all happened so fast he was… dizzy. 

And that was all combined with what was happening in his relationship with his father. They had both gotten much closer now that Portugal was physically there more often. I think Portugal is considerably less shitty to Brazil during these years, both because he needs him and because he is a relief from everything going on in Europe. But that doesn’t mean he became a good dad, but also Brazil was a lot smarter now, a lot freer, and quick to realize something that had always been true – Portugal needed Brazil more than Brazil needed Portugal. Much more. 

The fact that he wasn’t a colony anymore but wasn’t quite independent, and thus still had to obey Portugal to some degree, started to annoy him. This has quite a bit of teenage rebellion element into it, but that doesn’t mean it came from unjustified anger. Not at all. His pride and ego were starting to really develop. The king of Portugal liked him better than he liked port himself, Brazil was heaven on earth, Brazil was rich, Brazil was full of potential, Brazil was great, Brazil was paradise, Brazil was not his own.  

And that just keeps building.

And when Portugal starts talking about making him a colony again. After all that shit about the being a united kingdom, about Portugal being his father and trying to get close to him, of seeing him as a refuge and a relief, after all of that connection I think Portugal genuinely tried to build with him, the ugly truth is bare again – Portugal never saw him as worthy of equal footing, never saw that united kingdom as anything but temporary, never saw brazil as anything more than a colony. 

And Brazil is mad. 

When he found out the plans of Pedro I to declare independence, he’s more than happy. He’s been thinking of it for a while, and I think maybe deep down he didn’t love the idea of another Portuguese man being his boss, but Pedro had grown up in brazil, dude was carioca at heart, his wife was wonderful, Brazil could work with that. He declared independence, fought against Portugal, won, still had to pay for his independence, but, at last, he got it. 

I think in a way Brazil’s anger, as righteous as it was, did blind him to what was going on. He wanted so bad to get rid of Portugal and avoid going back to how it was when he was a colony, that he waved away or even approved things that really just kept him stuck in the same place. Very little actually changed for most people, and as someone who literally represented all the people, he knew that and could feel that, but he was still so euphoric personally about it that he… ignored it. 

Pedro I’s reign was… messy. He needed a constitution, he got into a war with Argentina, everyone was talking about who Pedro was fucking, it was just a whole mess. For that reason, I think despite declaring his independence, brazil remembers Pedro as being mostly an irresponsible asshole who couldn’t keep it in his pants and was too busy being a playboy to rule this country yet still managed to be authoritarian and also made him lose Uruguay. And when it came time for him to choose Brazil or Portugal, just like his father, he chooses Portugal. 

That was a blow on his ego. Brazil at this point was still just a teenager, who had in two decades grown insanely fast for a nation, has been told by each king his land was heaven on earth and so much richer than Portugal, yet no one was willing to choose him. Ever. He was still an afterthought. Like a colony, that still had a metropolis. Pedro left him with a 4-year-old, with a government disorganized, and no money. 

And then the Provinces start to rise up. 

So, hm, a quick background on how I see the provinces: Some of them existed since around 1530, some were younger and some weren't around yet, and if Brazil first appeared representing the people that were born in this new colony, the provinces were much more… administrative and political. Yet many of the ones that were around grew much faster than Brazil – they were already teenagers or even adults by independence. They had always responded directly to Portugal and for a long time saw no connection between themselves or between them and Brazil. The idea of “Brazil” was only like… 100 years old, even less than that. And some of them were not loving being attached to those two kids – Brazil and the baby emperor. They saw the weak government of the regency as a chance to rise up and declare their own independence, as many who started as provinces around them had – like Uruguay.

The regency lasted 9 years, but I think those few years were also crucial to form Brazil as a person, due to how stressful they were. Think about it, he saw what was happening around him, with Spain’s former colonies. And I think he for the first time had to grapple with the very human existential fear of death. 

If each of his provinces became their own country, would he still be around? Would he just become… Rio? But Rio existed as a province too. Would he just… be a lot of different countries? Probably not.  He would probably disappear. He had only just started to be allowed to live, but that could be taken away at any moment. Uruguay and Rio Grande do Sul succeeded in getting their independence. How long until the others? It was quite terrifying. And I think that experience not only made him averse to the idea of being a republic in general at the time, but also created a lot of emotional and psychological problems for him, a lot of insecurity, as well as it made him realize he was nothing. There was nothing to justify his existence. He couldn’t say he existed because he wanted freedom or republic, he had none of these, plus it was something the provinces too could have. What united that land? What made him him? Those were all questions that would haunt him for the rest of the empire, and he would soon be more than willing to go after and accept easy answers. That’s how he gets to that whole indianismo think I talked about some time ago.

He fights his own provinces, on people, countless times. Revolts that really were like civil wars kept popping, and he, who was just a teenager, had to fight to oppress his provinces and force them into being a part of him, for a reason he himself didn’t know. He couldn’t explain why they should be a part of him, except that they were and he wanted them to be and he wanted to live. And he didn’t know why.

In summary, this whole period was one of fear, and insecurity, and doubt. It shook him profoundly as a person more than as a country. Because once Pedrinho was in power, things were quick to stabilize and it was, in some ways, as if those revolts had never happened, but Brazil remembered them, he lived through them, and never really forgot that fear. 

If the regency was marked by external peace and internal turmoil, Pedrinho’s reign was one of relatively internal peace and external turmoil. Pedro II was… a complicated figure. Most Brazilians today regard him as an excellent ruler and a wise man, but I at least can’t be this optimistic about the man who insisted on the Paraguayan war, refused to abolish slavery for decades, and basically laid ground to a lot of the problems we still have today, like bad distribution of land and late industrialization. He didn’t do all that by himself, of course, a lot can be blamed on the senate, but he was the most powerful man on the country, and he receives way too much credit for his personal beliefs of being an abolitionist and a pacifist. Maybe he really was both these things, but that doesn’t change the fact that he didn’t use his power to end slavery and avoid war, quite the opposite. And why is that important here? Because I think brazil, the tan, was also fooled by it. He quickly bought into the narrative that Pedro II was this wise incredible man, and overlooked all the ways he kept the worst structures of the country untouched in order to not upset the elite that kept him in power. Brazil wanted nothing but stability and power, and Pedro, looking like the opposite of his father at the surface, brought that. There were no more separatist movements or civil wars once he rose to power, Rio Grande do Sul was reabsorbed, and the years that followed were ones of relative prosperity, and all of that really made brazil more and more attached to the whole concept of the empire. I think just like he was willing to ignore a lot of things during independence for the sake of it, here too he ignored all the ways Pedro II held him back so that he could fully feel the pride of being a powerful empire.

Brazil really did like being an empire during that time. The narrative of the empire was one that answered the question that haunted him for so long – what justified his existence. Justifying it, in the 19th century, is what I believe to be the main motivation underlying everything he did and thought. And the narrative was that the empire guaranteed stability and avoided civil wars and fragmentation, allowing Brazil to be, to quote José Bonifacio, “This majestic and solid piece of social architecture from the Prata to the Amazonas”, and again, all that in comparison to his neighbors that were constantly drowning in civil wars and fragmenting. For stability and that justification, he was willing to turn a blind eye to anything else.

So he rose from the regency feeling stronger than ever. Pedrinho had put everything into place, he was growing, he had a Brazilian in power for the first time, his coffee was going well, and he had survived. Many of his neighbors hadn’t, or at least not in the sense of managing to keep their territories intact. He did. His neighbors were unstable, with wars and coups and wars (like he hadn’t just had exactly that), he was stable and growing and he was the strongest. Once free of the fear of being destroyed from the inside, his ego grew once again, and he felt good. He felt pride in being a big strong and centralized empire, and to look down on the other Latin Americans and even on his father. He was ready now to make his power and influence spread, as an Empire. 

That's it, sorry if this is both ridiculously long and also a mess, I have way too many thoughts about imperial brazil and I could've probably written ten more pages of it and still have something to say. Also I'd still love to hear your thoughts on the empire for a Portuguese perspective, because I genuinely have no clue what that would look like. But anyway hmm I hope this was fun? 

[jae-canikeepyou]

| trust | j.jh

genre: high school au t/w: blood + violence a/n: if you had a dose of bad boy jaehyun, then this is the opposite 😗 you’ll know what i mean. i wrote this in one go and probably not the best i’ve written. it hope you enjoy this scenario! ~j.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

“ugh she’s here?” “she finally came after weeks, huh.” “you know jaehyun’s had a hard time dealing with someone like her.” “it’s not even his responsibility yet he still offers to help. y/n’s such a rebel.”

everything you ran into all ticked you off; the stares of students from different class sections, the growing whispers you heard weren’t even considered as whispers anymore. there wasn’t a single day you never encountered these ever since you decided to go back to studying again. it had been weeks. the hall continued to irritate your ears and space was laid out in front of you as the others leaned back to their lockers, like you were from a different dimension.

holding back an attitude, you turned the digits of your locker when books hit your head. you turned around to see sicheng, the secretary of the school’s student council. “pres needs to see you.”

“ha, no thanks. now leave me alone.” you scoffed. sicheng wasn’t having any of your obnoxious behavior; or that was how he saw it. he put out an arm and blocked your locker.

“you have to see him.” he insisted with eyes of concern.

“and i don’t.” you forcibly took your books from the locker, hugging them as you started to walk away from sicheng. a yank from the hem of your shirt pulled you back. all sorts of emotions built up from head to toe, you turned around to see sicheng’s face. “ew why are you grinning like that, pisses me off.”

“there’s this thing called irritated smile, y/n. i’m going to take far measures if you refuse to see him.” he grabbed your arm, squeezing it in case you planned to escape. he started to walk and the force from it already made you follow.

“what far measures?! you’re already doing it sicheng!” you yelled. your fingers curled to remove the lad’s hand. “let go you jerk!”

he led you to the fifth floor where the student council office was. apparently the meeting had just adjourned and you saw jaehyun stacking piles of paper. the rest of the council stared at you either with pissed faces or pity.

“pres, y/n’s here.” sicheng called out to the boy, who now stood up to fix his tie.

“thanks dude. you can leave us.” jaehyun replied.

the room soon emptied out, leaving the both of you in silence. the sounds of fans above you were the only ones heard. your hair flew in different directions before jaehyun shortened the distance between you, pushing back strands of hair behind your ear. aggravated at his move, you hit his hand. “if this is your way of being nice, i won’t accept it.” you glared, sitting at a desk behind with crossed arms.

“why’re you like this, y/n?” he asked as if he had the innocent mind. “you weren’t like this at all.”

“yeah i wasn’t until that day jaehyun!” you kicked a nearby chair.

<a few weeks ago>

shortly after the last class, you remembered the item you left in the classroom. the golden hour had just passed and every corner of the corridor drown in the orange lit sky behind the windows. the steps of your track shoes clicked the marbled floor. a few screeches of the metal spikes made you pull out your headphones. music blasted your ears however, it wasn’t enough to muffle out the sounds of glass shards coming from the electronic laboratory.

you didn’t care what happened in there, but that place was an important part of academic life. you were one of the students having the subject as an elective and it played a crucial part at this time of the semester. as hesitant as you were behind a slim gap opening of the door, your heart sank at the sight of completed reports being drenched in water, soon torn and crumpled in oozing mess. the apparatus for experiments were broken and almost every single thing in the lab had been destroyed. cans of spray paints were shaken and they soon met with the walls, profanities in caps written to diss the teacher became many.

you recognized these group of students— the honors, who regulars like you held grudges with them and hated the favoritism. even the uniforms were designed to differentiate the level of grading. the recent electronics results was one-sided, where they sweet-talked for an advantage in the ranking system. the relations of students was bad too; with the son of the dean controlling the honors, he would always want to kill time and play with the regulars.

apparently jaehyun was one of the honors who ranked higher than the rest— he was also a close friend of yours. yet he was also friends with the dean’s son. since his move to the honors, he changed, and you hated his ego.

you soon were spotted and forcibly put in the lab. your hand held the nearby desk before someone shoved you from behind, earning your fall. “what are you doing?” you asked, pointing at the vandalized areas.

“no, what are you doing? you regulars should learn privacy.” they all smirked, preparing their fists. “that’s new word for your dictionary. you may thank us.”

“i just happened to pass by and some roaches sure play dirty.” sarcasm was on your side, as well as your r.b.f.

“ha, not only regulars have limited vocabulary, they also have guts. let’s see if you have them now.” a boy pulled you from the collar, giving you a punch in the stomach. blows of attacks met your body, they encircled you with no escape. to them you were a weakling, but it was to conserve your strength for your attacks.

you had your chance to fight them, injuring and hurting them with your track shoes; creating open wounds and drops of their blood on the floor. they cursed with the pain and continued to pursue you, yet you weren’t having any of it. the swelling of your face started to kick in, with bruises so deep and limbs weakened, you were outnumbered. and before you knew it, darkness consumed your vision.

<at the dean’s office>

“miss y/n, with the meeting from the school board and student council, the verdict is to suspend you until further notice.” the dean said, his hands gestured you to leave.

you refused to do so, hands balling into fists. jaehyun held you by the shoulders, giving little force to make you start moving. “dean, i’ll see her out. and as for her actions, i apologize.” he bowed.

“jaehyun! it wasn’t me! why are you seeing this one-sidedly?!” you tried to escape his hold, but he was stronger. “i can’t be suspended!”

“you don’t have evidence, y/n.” he said sternly and that was like a slap to your face.

“i do have-”

“we’re leaving.” his eyes filled with anger now.

“yikes weeks of suspension, too bad.”

“the roach should learn discipline too.”

“i didn’t know a delinquent can change back.”

they gave giggles and mockery that pretty much made you want to go at them. jaehyun’s grip tightened on your shoulders, and with that you were already at the corridor. stares from both sides were on you. the honors having the oh-well face whilst the regulars gave a pitiful one as they didn’t know what to do to help you.

—

“you tell me! after what happened at the dean’s office you— stayed silent the whole time and then what?! somehow summing up that i was the one who initiated the vandalism?! the bullying?!” you yelled as your voice echoed, not caring to others who might’ve heard it.

“ugh here we go again. i can’t even have a proper conversation with you since then.” he rubbed his temples to sooth the upcoming pain. “look, i didn’t convince him. i wasn’t gonna side on anyone. i don’t understand why you’re-”

“oh and just like that you decided to protect your reputation as president than a fellow friend?! your silence was more than enough to make me feel you betrayed me!” your bitter voice couldn’t hide any of the pain it was giving.

“y/n, what did i tell you about your anger issues?” jaehyun asked, that alone made you fume more than the honors ever did. you walked towards him, poking him hard in the chest. it hurt that his ego went ahead of his friendship with you. it hurt when he chose to make you leave the office.

but there was one thing that hurt more,

that he was the boy you were in love with.

“anger issues?” you choked on your words. “the issue here is that did you ever think that maybe i was at the wrong place and wrong time? or that what had happened might’ve been the opposite? yet you let your stupid ego eat you.”

jaehyun saw how you slowly went back to that desk you leaned on, head down and chest heaving deeply. he remembered the time he saw you at the alley, far back in the garbage area all beaten up yet he has never seen a smile so genuine like yours. an urge hit him to help you, so he tended your wounds. to him you’ve always wore a brave face. the you right now was something he never seen.

you cried and threw a fit to every chair and desk you could possibly see, earnestly wanting to let out all misery and heartbreak with a scream. jaehyun’s guilt plunged to the deepest. he admitted that his disappointment put your friendship at risk. he couldn’t bear to see you at your lowest when before the incident, you were a rising gem. an undiscovered talent who excelled when given a second chance.

“y/n..” jaehyun approached with wavering hands. he didn’t know why but he wanted to hold you, to let you know that someone was on your side even if he didn’t believe you.

but he suddenly had a spark of assimilation.

he should’ve believed you.

his large arms held you from behind, and even you felt angry and deceived from his angelic exterior, it was the same feeling when he first met you— the dependable heart.

“i’m sorry.. i guess my pride did change me. i was blind to see my surroundings and the acceptance i got from the honors was overwhelming. i was happy for once, like my hardwork was paid off. it seemed like a place where i belonged but then it altered my attention from you.” he said in a soft voice. “i want to help you, if you give me a chance to do that.”

the latter sentence was the same words he said that day he met your beaten-up self.

“i hate you. you’re crazy.” you turned around to hit him, later seeing his eyes full of willingness.

“yeah. i am.” he replied quickly with his hands by your waist. “i have to be crazy to be in love.”

“in love my butt.” you spat back, but that made him smile since he made you leave the office. “that confession of yours won’t make me soft or forgive you.”

“then what should i do for you to forgive me? or love me?” he asked, his hands now intertwining with yours.

i’m already in love with you, idiot. and to be frank that action made your head spin where all you saw was flying hearts and flowers.

you wriggled from his hold, grabbing your bag to leave the meeting room. “i’ll consider your apology if you find it in the lab.”

he lifted a brow as he crossed his arms. “what do you mean?”

“there’s a tiny cube on top of a dslr camera that is inside the second cupboard. get that and check your email. you might want to show the dean tomorrow too.” you wore your bag. “apparently that was the item i forgot in the lab. i tried telling you the truth that day. anyway, you’ll know the rest when you see the email.”

he tried to speak out but held it in when you stopped by the door. “if you do that, i’ll consider your confession too.” you smiled and left.

jaehyun went to the lab right after. he had the cube in his hands and what he stumbled upon now was ordinary. the email you sent him was extraordinary.

the cube was a hidden camera, and the email contained the video that serves a proof of your innocence. right then and there he thought,

he should’ve put trust in your words.

[shirtlesssammy]

2x08: Crossroad Blues

Welcome to this season’s real hellatus! We’ve got a little theme for the episodes we’re recapping. Try and guess what it is :D Also, we have some good news and bad news. Good news: We’re going to do a whole week of recaps towards the end of the break! Yay! Bad news: They’re all episodes that we hate. We need to get them off our recap plate before the show ends. Enjoy the hellatus (*crying noise*).

Then:

Sam Winchester, professional puppy dog

Now:

Greenwood, Mississippi

August, 1938

Robert Johnson plays Crossroads Blues on a stage to a crowd at a bar. He briefly hears growls but continues to play. He stops again when he sees shadows race outside. The crowd looks confused. Robert runs outside after hearing barks. He races to a shed, but the unseen source of the barking follows him. He kneels to await his fate. 

The door bursts open to find a woman and two men from the bar. The men run to find help and the woman pleads with Robert to stay with her as he mutters, “Dogs, black dogs.” He dies in her arms. 

Sam and Dean are at a diner and Sam’s researching how much of an outlaw Dean is. Sam is upset because it’s going to make their job harder now that the feds have them on their radar. Well, they have Dean on their radar. Dean thinks Sam is jealous. 

Sam’s got a case. An architect jumped off a building he designed, after calling animal control about seeing wild black dogs in his condo. 

There’s a ton of lore on black dogs. Dean brings the real insight to the situation when he tells Sam, “Bet they could hump the crap out of your leg.” AND I MISS THIS DEAN SO MUCH SOME DAYS. 

They interview Gunner Lawless his business partner under the guise of writing a tribute for Architectural Digest. His partner is resentful but admits that the man was a genius. He wasn’t always that way though. He wonders why people with true talent die young. 

The brothers’ next stop is at an area animal shelter. Dean flirts his way into learning more about black dogs in the area. Dean Bean got Carly’s MySpace address too. 

They next head to interview all the people that reported the black dogs. The first on their list is Dr. Sylvia Pearlman. She hasn’t been home in two days. Dean notes that she’s chief of surgery at her hospital, a position she’s had for ten years. She’s only about 42, so she’s very young for that position. They also find a connection to their vic and the doctor. They both visited a place called Lloyd’s Bar. 

Meanwhile, the doctor is hiding out in an early season dingy motel room. She’s frazzled and petrified when someone knocks on the door. The motel staff is there demanding money for another night’s stay. She grabs her money and turns to the man in the door,  only to see his face warp unnaturally. 

The boys find Lloyd’s Tavern next. On the cross road outside the joint, Dean notices yarrow flowers growing alongside the road. These flowers are used for summoning rituals. They put things together and start digging a hole in the middle of the crossroads. They find a tin with various items in it.

People have been summoning and making deals with a demon. “Y’know cause that always ends good.” EAT YOUR WORDS DEAN. Sam says that these people aren’t seeing black dogs, they’re seeing hell hounds. 

Meanwhile, the doctor meets her end with a visit from her own date with the hell hounds. 

Rosedale, Mississippi

1930

We witness Robert Johnson make his crossroads deal with a demon. 

Sam notes that whatever they’re dealing with is a lot like the Robert Johnson lore. Dean notes that Johnson’s music is full of references to hell hounds, demon deals, and the occult. Dean’s barely-tolerating-this-bullshit eyeroll is truly a wonder. (Objectification Sidenote: Damn, Dean’s pretty in this scene.) 

Anyway, they have a picture of another person that made a deal, George Darrow. They head to where he lives. They notice pepper on the doorsill. George answers his door but doesn’t want anything to do with them. They reveal that they know about the supernatural and tell him they want to help. Sam asks about the pepper and George tells them that it’s actually goofer dust. It keeps out demons.

George talks about making his deal and reveals that the demon stayed around Lloyd’s for a week making deals with other people. George mentions the architect and doctor. There’s one other person that also made a deal ten years prior, a man named Evan Hudson. George is resigned to his fate and tells the brothers to leave. 

Evan Hudson works in his home office late at night and flinches at hell hound barks. His wife peeks in before she heads off on a trip. 

As she’s bidding him farewell, her face warps into a dead zombie howl. WHEE HALLUCINATIONS!

Sam and Dean arrive at Evan’s house. Dean opens with asking about Lloyd’s Bar, and Evan immediately slams the door in his face and retreats into his home. That went well! Dean kicks down the door and I’m FINE WITH THIS and not objectifying him at all.

The Winchesters corner Evan in his office. Yes, he knows hell hounds are coming for his soul. Dean’s bitterly dismissive of Evan’s distress, joking about potentially frivolous reasons for him to bargain his soul away. Evan reveals that his wife was dying of cancer, and he made a deal for her health. While Sam melts into a puppy-eyed puddle, Dean still reacts to this with anger. “You ever think about her in all this?” Dean asks. “I think you did this for yourself. So you wouldn’t have to live without her. Well guess what? She’s gonna have to live without you now.”  

Dean’s anger is...counterproductive. So Sam pulls Dean away and they consult in the hall. Dean instructs Sam to spread George’s goofer dust around while he high tails it to the crossroads to summon himself a demon. He’ll exorcise it, and that will buy them a little time. Sam calls this out as a reckless plan and speculates that Dean’s only doing it because he thinks their dad made a deal. “What if he struck a deal?” Dean asks. “My life for his soul?” OH this SWEET EMOTIONAL TORTURE! He heads out to summon the demon.

Dean buries his offering in the crossroad and turns around to find a woman smirking at him. She’s a crossroads demon! They take turns objectifying each other and then Dean invites her to meet in his car for a little privacy. Classic serial killer pickup line. 

Dean tells the demon his terms. He wants Evan released from his deal and he’ll barter himself for it. “You’d sacrifice yourself for someone else?” she says with a devilish smile. “Like father, like son.” 

DRAMATIC MUSIC BREAK

The demon gleefully taunts Dean about John’s deal. When Dean tries to usher her into his car, she balks at the edges of the devil’s trap she sees peeking out from under Baby. Nice try, Dean Bean!

Meanwhile, Evan does his best dramatic chipmunk (prairie dog) impression. 

The hell hounds are now growling from INSIDE THE HOUSE! Sam and Evan watch the doors warily. 

While the hounds close in, Dean gets emotionally traumatized by the demon. (Side note, her breath is visible in this scene and she’s wearing a short sleeved, thin dress. I’m cold in sympathy.) She taunts him about his man-pain and terrible guilt about John’s death. She has the power to bring back John. Dean seems...interested.

The hell hound at Evan’s house stops rattling the door and the room goes silent for a moment until...the hound bursts through the ventilation grate! What a smart doggo!

Dean wants to learn more about the potential to bring back his dad and mopes under a wooden structure until the demon joins him there. She tells him she can give him a ten year deal: John’s life for Dean’s, and they get ten years together before Dean heads below. She plays Dean like a fiddle, and we get a callback to Dean’s feelings in Faith - that he’s not supposed to be alive. Dean experiences VERY LARGE EMOTIONS before wandering out of the structure. “You think you could throw in a set of steak knives?” He directs her attention upward, where he’s painted a devil’s trap on the underside of the structure. What a smart Dean Bean! Excellent misdirection. 

Dean reels off HIS deal: Evan lives, and the demon goes free. If she doesn’t strike a deal, she gets exorcised. (Which is SO embarrassing amirite?) 

Dean starts the exorcism and it starts a fierce wind to howling. The wind gusts into Evan’s house and blows away Sam’s goofer dust circle. Sam and Evan run for safety. The hell hound barks fiercely...until it doesn’t.

Cut to Dean angry-kissing the demon. A kiss seals the deal (apparently all demons like to slip a little tongue). (Insert crack headcanon that this is Crowley in an alternate vessel, when he first gets heart eyes for Dean.)

The demon tells Dean that her word is her bond, but if Dean breaks their deal then the first thing she’ll do when she escapes Hell is tear into Evan like he’s wet paper.

The demon can’t resist one parting shot. Dean should’ve taken the deal. John Winchester’s torture is unimaginably bad. Dean charges for her, the demon smokes out, and Dean’s left with a scared woman in the middle of the crossroads and way too many feelings.

Driving away, Sam and Dean listen to the blues and contemplate John’s deal. Sam tries to focus on the people John saved, but Dean’s stuck in a sadness pit of his own making. Sam asks him if he considered actually making the deal. Dean doesn’t answer, instead just turning the music up.

Oh, Dean.

The Quotes Bark at Midnight:

Dude, I'm like Dillinger or something

I bet they could hump the crap outta your leg

MySpace, what the hell is that?

Somebody goes over Niagara in a barrel, you gonna jump in and try to save 'em?

You're lucky I've got a soft spot for lost puppies and long faces

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive! 

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Best of the Best | Part 1

Genre: Smut and Angst

Word Count: 4k

Summary: You promised yourself you’d never fall for another clingy, needy boy who demanded you gave him all your love, only to leave you after he has sucked you dry. Yet here you were, making that same mistake again. Alternatively: It wasn’t easy being perfect. Sometimes, Taeyong needed someone else to take control. Sometimes, he needed to be broken down completely in order to be put back together again, better and stronger. 

A/N: I tried to get as close as I can to ty’s actual personality in this one. This is largely inspired by his verse in Whiplash and some tidbits about his life that I learned from @nctforuandme she’s honestly single-handedly responsible for reigniting my obsession with ty so thank you a lot babe

Warnings: femdom, sub!taeyong, dom!reader, student/professor relationship, age-gap, dry humping, thigh riding, degradation, sexist remarks, breath play, semi-public sex, cheating, Miss kink (?), pwb professors with benefits, usage of the painfully cliche trope of “but you can’t fall in love with me”

“What is this?” You hear someone bark out. At first, you don’t think the wrathful inquiry is directed at you. After all, who would dare speak to you this way? But when you hear the same voice shout out again, much closer this time, you look up to find that the person, that poor fucker, was in fact talking to you. “Are you deaf? I asked you a question.” The students, who were just starting to file out of the room at the end of your lecture, freeze in their tracks and look over, varying degrees of shock and trepidation displayed on their faces. One of them, a tall bespectacled boy who you know you guess is a friend of the boy with the suicidal wish, Lee Taeyong, bravely steps forward to try and pull him back, muttering quietly to him, “Let’s go, man. It’s not worth it.” But the silver haired boy shakes him off, never taking his hateful gaze off of you. “No, this is bullshit. This paper is worth twenty-five percent of our final score and she gave me a D. A fucking D! This is gonna mess up my whole grade.” Gasps echo around the room as more students come into the room instead of getting out in order to watch the scene unfold. The boy’s friend pales and urgently whispers to him, “Dude, the man-eater is gonna have your balls for this. Apologize and let’s—“ You’ve heard enough.

“Everyone, get the hell out of my lecture room.” Your voice booms out, making students jump in fear and slip out hurriedly. When you see some still hesitate to leave, their curiosity getting the best of them, you threaten, “I’m going to count to five, and if I see anyone else in here after I’m done besides Mr. Lee, they can expect a zero on their next exam.” At that, everyone quickly rushes out. Even Lee’s friend backs away, his hands raised in the air as if to say he has nothing to do with his friends stupidity, and then he leaves too. When the room is empty sans you and Lee, you speak again. “What seems to be the problem, Mr. Lee?” “I want you to change my grade to an A.” He demands as if it was his right to get the grade he wanted, looking every bit the spoiled brat whose daddy always gave him everything he’s ever asked for. It wasn’t a look becoming of a young man studying at a prestigious university such as this, and the look you give him in response speaks volumes of how little you appreciated that.   “You don’t deserve an A. Your work wasn’t up to par.” You say dismissively. Your response seems to make him light up with pure fury. “Bullshit! I worked my ass off on this paper. I’ve been getting straight A’s eve since I set foot in this damn college. I’m not going to have my perfect score ruined by you.” “Well, you should’ve thought of that earlier. Maybe then you would’ve given me something better than the dismal excuse for a paper that you handed in. You’re lucky I even let you pass. Don’t make me rethink my decision.” You threaten him, hoping to dissuade him from his silly tantrum. Despite your reputation for being a merciless “man-eater”, you really didn’t derive any joy from making the lives of your students miserable, whether they were male or female. You cared about your students. You took pride in your work. That’s the whole reason you were so strict in the first place. You wanted to have a positive impact on their lives. You worked your ass off so that years from now, one of these students might look back on their college years and think ‘Man, I really learned something of value from Miss ___.’ That used to be the case anyway. Now, having endured years of indifferent students and spiteful colleagues, you’ve all but lost your passion for what used to be your dream job. But even so, you still cared about your students and you were still willing to let Lee’s little tantrum go if he backs down and apologizes, despite him having so brazenly disrespected you in front of the entire class.  But it seems he’s not too smart, that one. “I gave you my best work. I always give my best work! That’s why every other professor before you has given me straight A’s.” “Hmm, is that why? Funny. And here I thought all the others were just kissing your ass because your father is a major investor in this university and they’re just trying to save their own cowardly asses. Sorry, sweetheart, I’m just so dumb sometimes.” You smack your forehead with your palm, pretending to extrude the stupidity out. “Don’t you dare—“ He seethes, looking absolutely murderous, and you swear you can actually hear his teeth grinding together. “I got this far through my hard work and my hard work alone. I will not let you take that away from me.” “Let’s see that hard work in your next assignment then.” You try to end it there, feeling weary already, but still wanting to give him a second chance that he didn’t deserve to tuck his tail between his legs and run. Turning your back to him, you grab your folder off the desk, looking to gather your things and leave, but he promptly rips it from your hands and throws it to the side, your carefully collected and sorted papers flying out and scattering all over the floor. You don’t have any time to react as he backs you into the desk and looms over you with equal parts anger and desperation. “Look, just tell me what you want and you’ll have it. You want a Rolex? How about a nice Louis Vuitton bag, huh? Say what you want and it’s yours. Just… please, I need that A.” His sudden change in demeanor from lethal to excessively desperate was concerning and a little bit unsettling. Why did he need that A so bad? It’s not like it’s going to affect his overall score that much. He won’t get a perfect GPA but it wouldn’t be too far off. “Mr. Lee, look at me.” You sigh in exasperation and gesture towards your generic, economic outfit of a simple white blouse and a black skirt. “Don’t you think a watch or a bag that cost more than my entire wardrobe would look silly on me?” “I could buy you a whole new wardrobe then, to fit your new accessories. Is that what you want?” He hurries to say, a knowing glint in his eyes as if he’s onto you. “Are you even listening? What I want is for you to leave me alone.” You take a step to the side, trying to get out from under him but he slams his hands down on either side of you, trapping you against the desk. “So the rumors about you are true, huh? You really are a bitter bitch who takes pleasure in making the lives of her male students miserable in order to make up for her own sad and loveless life.” He snarls, looking down his nose at you. “You know, maybe if you weren’t such a frigid bitch, a man would actually want to touch your shriveled up pussy. Give me that A and I’ll give you that dicking I know you’re dying for, baby.” “Oh, but Mr. Lee…” You gasp, looking up at him demurely, lulling him into a false sense of security as you lightly trail a hand up his chest towards his neck. “I don’t fuck little whores.”   You circle your fingers around his neck and press down, cutting off the gasp that tried to fight its way out of his throat. As you lightly choke him, you monitor his reaction closely, ready to pull back at any sign of distress. But just like you had predicted, he stays rooted to the spot, looking at you like an animal caught in a trap, his eyes jumping around in alarm as he tries to catch his breath and make sense of what is happening. Smirking, you press down harder on his throat, slimming his breathing down to a wheeze. “What makes you think that you would even be allowed to put your dirty, little cock anywhere near my pussy? You’re just a stuck-up, spoiled little brat who needs to be reminded how to properly talk to his superiors. Do you know what you should be calling me, boy, or are you too dumb to even remember?” “Yes,” He grits out, getting dizzy from the lack of oxygen to his brain. He was glaring bloody murder at you but he never once attempts to pull back. You knew he wouldn’t. You had always been an excellent judge of character, a skill that’s came in handy quite often in your profession, and you knew just what this boy so desperately needed. “Yes, what, little slut?” “Yes, Miss.” He wheezes out and bucks his hips against you, making you snap at him and press down harder on his windpipe, blocking his airflow entirely. “Did I say you could do that? How are you going to ‘give me that dicking I’m dying for’ when just having my hand on your throat is making you hump me like a horny virgin?”     All at once, you take the pressure off his neck and he folds over, molding his body to yours as he sucks in deep, gasping breaths. Grabbing his jaw, you press your face close to his. “Look at you, so wrecked already. Are you that easy? I didn’t even need to touch your little dick. I bet you would cum if I so much as lay a finger on you, wouldn’t you?”   When he doesn’t reply, you clench your hand down on his jaw, your fingers digging into his cheeks, and ask again, “Wouldn’t you?” “Yes, Miss.”  “Would you like that?” “Yes, please, Miss.” “No.” You deadpan, “You don’t deserve it.” He slumps, looking positively crestfallen, but doesn’t protest. You’re quiet for a moment, your face a mask of cold disinterest as you stare him down, watching as he slowly unravels under the weight of your unimpressed gaze. He was trying so hard to hold onto his pride even as his eyes start to tear up and his hips move ever so slightly against you, timidly pleading you to give him something, anything. "You really want that A, huh?” Your face breaks out into a triumphant grin, “OK, I’ll give it to you.” Caught up in your game, he had forgotten what this was about in the first place, and so he starts, thrown off by the sudden reminder. “That’s what you wanted, right?” You taunt, smirking as you watch him gape and fumble. “Yes, b-but—“ “B-b-b-but,” You mock, laughing, and the boy’s face flushes crimson. He bites his lip and averts his eyes in embarrassment. You smile at him knowingly, stating state what you knew he wished to say, “But now you’re all wound up now and you want to cum too, don’t you, greedy little slut?” “I'll tell you what? I'll give you that A you’re whoring yourself out for, and I’ll not force you walk out of here with blue balls and a stiff cock. How does that sound?” The boy gives you what might possibly be the most innocent look you’ve ever seen on his face, or anyone’s face for that matter. He was wide eyed and slack jawed, fear and hope flitting over his face in alternating ripples as he tries to make out what your angle here was. You half-expect to see little restless ears sprout up from the top of his head for how much he resembled a frightened little kitty right now. He looked so unlike his normally cold and severe self. Right in front of your eyes, he seems to transform into someone else entirely; his white skin turning warm and tan, his demeanor tender and inviting, his sharp features broadening and a full, boxy smile replacing the thin-lipped pout on his face… But as soon as you blink, he’s Lee Taeyong again, and not the boy who broke your heart so many years ago. Pushing him away, he stumbles on unsteady feet as you walk around the desk and sit on the leather chair. You pat your thigh, flushing the intrusive thoughts away and ordering him tightly, “Come here.” He doesn’t protest, just walks up to you in a daze and sits down on your lap, straddling your thigh between his legs and looking at you expectantly. “What I’m offering you here is a chance to get everything you want. If you can get yourself off just by riding my thigh, I’ll give you that A you so desperately want." Taeyong looked positively terrified, his face paling as he tries to figure out if this was a trick or not. Taking pity on him, you cradle his face in your hands and gently ask, “Can you do that for me, Mr. Lee? Can you show me what a good, hard working boy you are?” He nods fervently, eager to believe you, his hands going to his pants to unbutton them, but you brush them away. "No. Keep them on. I want to see you make a mess for me." Sucking in a breath, he whispers harshly, “Yes, Miss.” When he starts moving on top of you, it’s a little uncomfortable. He is somehow both heavy and bony, but you don’t dwell on it for long, not when he almost immediately picks up his pace, grinding against you earnestly as if he just suddenly realized how badly he needed to get off.  You watch his frantic movements in amusement, remarking, “You know, if we had enough time, I would never have let you off this easily. I would’ve edged you on for so long that you’d cum on command.” He shivers at your words, his hips grinding down harder against your thighs as delicious little moans fall freely from his mouth. You support his head in your palm as it lolls to the side, “Then I’d make you cum again and again. I would make you cum so many times that by the end of the night you'll be crying and begging me to hurt you even more." “Yeah, yeah,” He moans encouragingly, clutching onto you and swiveling his hips around in circles, his cock driving into the flesh of your thigh hard. "Be quiet kitten or someone will hear your mewls." You laugh, slipping a hand under his shirt to softly caress his stomach. He was shuddering like a leaf above you, barely able to control his movements, and he doesn't calm down. He only gets louder. "Damn, you’re a loud little slut." You push the fingers of the hand that had been cradling his face into his mouth, muffling his moans, and he immediately goes to work licking and sucking on your fingers like a lollipop.  "I knew I was right about you. From the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew that you were just begging for someone to strip you off of your abrasive and entitled attitude and whip you back into shape. But no one ever did, right? They all saw you acting cold and clawing at anyone who tries to come near, and they assumed you’re a lion trying eat them up. But you’re not a lion. You’re just a frightened little kitty looking for someone worthy enough to tame him.” You confidently, watching as the boy melts under your words, allowing you to gaze upon his true self.  You know it’s hard for him, exposing himself like this, so you try to be gentle with him. “Poor kitty, you must’ve been waiting for so long. I can’t imagine that your pretty little girlfriend ever took charge of you like you crave. I bet she just lets you do whatever you please with her. I bet she never once punished you for being so insolent or fucked you until you cried out for forgiveness. Isn’t that right, little kitty?” Taeyong’s legs clench around your thigh and he pulls his head back, your fingers slip out of his mouth and tracking strings of saliva behind them as he cries out, “I’m so close, Miss. Please, let me cum.” Since all of this must be so overwhelming for him and yet he was still well-behaved enough to ask before cumming without you needing to tell him to, you decide to take it easy on him. “Cum, little kitten, show me what a good boy you can be.” He gives a few last erratic thrusts before his body seizes up and he cries out, finally cumming. You quickly clamp a hand over his mouth to muffle his screams, feeling warmth coat the fabric of your skirt as he shudders above you. When he hunches over you, completely spent, you wraps your arms around him and rub his back soothingly, listening to him gasp for air and feeling his heart beat wildly through his frail rib-cage. "Hush little kitten. It’s OK. You’re OK. I’ve got you.” "Thank you, Miss." His reply is muffled as he buries his face in your shoulder. As his body slowly relaxes and his breathing settles down, you slowly become aware of what exactly you just did... You got yourself sexually involved with a student, a clearly troubled boy who craves affection and support and who probably now thinks you can give him that.  Why do you always go after the broken ones?  Technically, it wasn’t against school policy to hook up with a student but you could still get a lot of grief over this, and that’s just the administrative and interpersonal-relationships  aspects of it… You sigh, pushing the boy up so you can lock eyes with him. "You did well, Mr. Lee. You’ll be getting that A you were promised. You just need to keep what happened between us to yourself. After we leave this room, you have to promise to never talk about this again, not to me, not to anyone. Is that understood?" You hope he would gladly take your offer and leave. After all, he just got the grade he wanted and an orgasm to boot. But when he hesitates to answer you, you know you’re in trouble. “Mr. Lee, do we have a deal?” For another agonizing second, he remains quiet, throwing you into a vicious loop of worrying about all the improbable reasons behind his silence and how you’re going to deal with them and all the possible ways this could end badly for you.  Finally though, he breaks eye contact and answers you with a timid, “Okay.” As you watch him leave the lecture room, his gait funny because of the sticky mess in his pants, you pray to god that the feeling of dread washing over you is completely unjustified and that this wouldn’t come back to bite you in the ass later. •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• As always though, your gut feeling was correct. After your little encounter with Mr. Lee, it was like he became obsessed with you. He would openly stare at you during lectures then find any flimsy excuse to talk to you after, leaving his friends to scratch their heads and wonder why the boy who was just about to end you a week ago was now always following you around like a little duckling. It was all getting very suspicious and you found yourself forced to intervene quickly before anyone figured it out. Rounding him up in your office--a concerningly easy feat seeing as the boy was more than happy to be locked up in a room alone with you-- you turn on him, “Mr. Lee, what on earth are you doing?” “I—I am asking you about the assignment.” He gulps, trying not to give himself away and failing miserably. “I don’t understand the part where—“ “Cut the crap, Lee. You understand it perfectly. You’re not very smooth, you know? Now tell me, what is this about?” You demand. You weren’t slick either. You knew what he wanted but you were desperately hoping you were wrong, the sickening sense of déjà vu coursing through your brain so strong, it was nauseating. You couldn’t handle another needy, clingy boy who demands all your love then leaves you when he has run you dry. The boy scratches the back of his neck sheepishly, and stumbles through his words, "Can I... can we...do... it again? What happened last week, I mean. Not exactly the same though! I can make you feel good too I swear I—“ “Didn’t we agree to never talk about that again? You’re talking about it.” “I know but I just can’t stop thinking about it! That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had and you didn’t even touch me. Holy shit, I can’t wait to see what you can do if you actually touch me.” “Then I’m afraid you’ll be waiting for a long time. What I did was wrong and unprofessional and as your professor, I sincerely apologize to you for that. It can’t happen again." “Why?” He whines childishly.  "Because I’m your professor.” You say it like it’s matter-of-fact, because it is. “If the other professors find out I’m sexually involved with a student, they’ll ostracize me. It’s already hard enough with all the malicious rumors running around about me just because I’m a woman who dares to be assertive and not let men walk all over her. If they find out about this, it will just be more proof in their minds that I hate men and I’m taking it out on a poor student.” “They won’t find out. I’ll make sure of it. I'll keep pretending I hate you and no one will ever know. And even if they did, I can shut them up. You said it yourself; my father is the biggest investor in this college and they all want to stay on my good graces. Please, I need this.” “That’s not how it works, Mr. Lee. They’ll only shut up in front of you but they’ll still talk behind your back. Why don’t you just hire a dominatrix or something if you need this so bad?” "I don’t want a fucking dominatrix. I want you." There was that fire in his eyes again, the all-consuming passion to get what he wants at whatever cost that you’re so used to seeing from him. This Taeyong was completely different from your previous lover. He was rage and determination and cold, blue fire; nothing like the warm and soothing orange of the other, softer boy. You knew this Taeyong. You could handle this Taeyong. “I don’t want a strange woman whipping me around and telling me to lick her boots. I want you. You get me! You saw me in a way no one ever did before. I just... I’m so close to losing it. I have to put on this persona every minute of every day but it’s slipping off and I can’t keep it in place anymore. I need to let go for once and let someone else take charge or I’m going to snap. Please, help me.” The problem is that you believed him wholeheartedly; you sympathized with him wholeheartedly. Because beneath his hard exterior, there was a soft, mushy thing inside that frail rib-cage of his that mirrored your own. You couldn’t turn him away when you saw yourself in him. So you agree, under one condition. “You can’t fall in love with me. If you do then it’s over.” Taeyong laughs incredulously, taken aback by the weird condition, and his mood immediately lifts up, clearly not taking what you’re saying seriously. “Look, Miss, I’m just trying to get fucked. Nobody’s falling in love here, at least not me.” That arrogant smirk was back on his face again. He looked so damn confident. So why was your gut feeling telling you that this is all a huge mistake? “Good.” You say, squashing the feeling down and taking in the beautiful, broken boy. •❅──────✧❅✦❅✧──────❅• A/N: AHHHHHH I’m so excited for this series y’all. This was long overdue. Anticipate a lot of angst with this one. It’s gonna be dark but not in a criminal way, more like a slowly soul-crushing way like THERAPY. ahahahha as always I live off feedback and I’m anticipating your wonderful messages 

[the-sarcastic-trashmouth]

Would you stay if I’m sick? (Request)

Prompt: I saw you were asking for writing prompts for the IT fandom and I have read and loved all of your fics on Ao3 and would love to see you write something about Stanley’s OCD perhaps stozier or stanpat! Love your work!! ❤️--Anonymous

Summary: “You might want to visit a doctor. Are you aware that you show signs of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?” She asked, causing Stan to blink a few times.

“Wait, wait--You think Stan the man has OCD?” Richie raised his hand before asking.

“It’s possible. I’m not saying that’s what you have. I’m saying that it’s something to look into.” She explains. 

“Is… Is something wrong with me?” Stan asked worriedly.

Pairing: Richie Tozier x Stanley Uris

Warning: Talks of OCD, ADHD, and getting help for those illnesses. I don’t have OCD and I don’t claim to understand half of what they go through. Please read with caution.

Stanley was someone who had a very precise routine from the time he woke up to the time he went to sleep. He liked order and things been done in a very specific way or his brain would replay the scene over and over in his head until he’d fix it. It was something he physically couldn’t help.

A lot of people looked at him weirdly because of how Stan did every task that he was given. It really wasn’t his fault that he was wired this way… It was like his brain had to obsess over every little detail in his life. If he didn’t… his brain would never turn off and it would make it almost impossible to function.

Some days were harder than others.

Once in a while, Stan’s brain would battle him to the point where eating wasn’t an option because he had missed three questions on his math test. He studied and studied for days to make sure that he would ace that damn thing, but somehow, he had missed three questions. It made knots form in his stomach as his mind chanted how he wasn’t good enough and that his parents are going to be upset with him.

“Stan?” It was Ben’s voice that finally knocked him from his spiraling anxiety riddle brain. “You okay? You haven’t touched your lunch yet.” He points out as Richie glanced away from Bev to look at Stan.

“I… I’m not… I’m not really hungry right now.” Stan explains calmly. He knew that if he ate something… his stomach would regurgitate it back up and that would only make things worse.

“Stanley.” Richie’s voice was soft as he nudged him so Stan would look at him. “What’s going on?” He asked quietly.

“I…” His hands were shaking hard as he winced, trying to stop them. “I just… I’m fine.” His eyes snapped open as he looked to Richie who was watching him with a worried expression.

“Stan--” He’s cut off when Stan looks to him.

“It’s stupid okay! Just fucking leave it alone.” He huffed before looking away with angered tears forming in his eyes.

“Okay, well now, I’m really worried. Whatever it is… I’m sure it’s not stupid.” Richie points out.

“Richie’s right… For once.” Bev snorts as Richie flips her the bird.

“Stan, please tell us?” Eddie asked, glancing at him with a frown.

“That… That math test we took today… I fucking missed three questions.” He then proceeded to slam his head down onto the table with a groan.

“What?” Bev busted out laughing. “That’s it?” She questioned as Richie frowns at her.

“Hey, it’s okay. I know you studied really hard for that test. You did your best.” Richie explains instead.

“And look what it got me. Fucking three missed questions. Even my best isn’t good enough. I’m such a failure. My dad is right… I’m a failure.” Stan whispered before he started to tug at his curls.

“Hey, hey whoa!” Richie yanks his hands out of his hair as he blinked at him. “Alright, let’s just calm down before you make yourself go bald. I love you and your curls thanks.” He comments as Stanley’s breathing started to pick up.

“He looks like he’s going to throw up.” Eddie pointed out warily before moving away from beside Stan. “Is he?” He asked worriedly.

“No, Jesus, Eddie. He’s not gonna fucking puke!” Richie huffed. “And if he does I’m turning him towards you!” He smirks at Eddie’s glare. “Stan, okay. How about we fix this?” He asked.

“How? How are we going to fix this? Huh?” Stan was getting angry because he just wanted his brain to shut up for a few seconds.

“Let’s talk to Mrs. Vivan. Maybe she can let you retake the test?” Richie offers quietly. “I mean you can tell her you weren’t feeling well. She likes you and she’ll definitely let her favorite student retake the test.” He explains.

“You… You think she would?” Stan asked quietly as Richie nods.

“After school today we can go talk to her. I’m sure she’ll be happy to help you.” He assures with a gentle smile.

“Okay… Thanks. I just… My head hurts.” Stan sighs, shoulders slumping as Richie took his hand in his own and squeezed it gently.

“Yeah, that big brain of yours is always racing.” He snorts as Stan’s face flushes before he looked away.

True to his word, Richie took Stan to see Mrs. Vivan after school to talk about the test. Stan was trying not to freak out, but it was so hard because… what if she said no? What if she told him he was a failure, too? What if Richie makes fun of him like the others because he can’t control his emotions when it comes to good grades.

That’s the one thing that he’s always been proud of. His ability to learn information in such a short amount of time impressed a lot of teachers and even his parents. To have this taken away from him… was like taking away the very foundation that made him Stan.

“Oh, hello Stanley, Richie,” She nods to them before smiling. “What brings you here? Something we need to discuss?” She asked, taking off her glasses before standing up from her desk.

“Yeah, about the test we took today. We were wondering if Stan could retake it.” Richie explains as Mrs. Vivan frowns softly before glancing at him.

“Why? You did excellent on that test. My highest score exactly.” She comments before sitting on top of her desk as she gestures for the boys to sit down.

“But I missed three questions. I can’t… You don’t understand.” Stan whispered softly. “I studied for this test really hard.” He felt tears flooding his eyes as he tried not to break down.

Richie’s eyes widened before he glanced at Mrs. Vivan who held the same shocked expression.

“Stanley, those… those three questions you missed were bonus points. They were for the next lesson we are going to learn. It just helps me to know what level everyone is at. Honestly, you had the right system, just came to the wrong conclusion.” She explains softly.

“But--” Stan bit his lip harshly before finally thumping down in his chair.

“Stanley, can I ask if you are taking any sort of medication?” She questioned as Richie and Stan both frowned.

“No, do I need to?” He resorted when she tilts her head.

“You might want to visit a doctor. Are you aware that you show signs of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder?” She asked, causing Stan to blink a few times.

“Wait, wait--You think Stan the man has OCD?” Richie raised his hand before asking.

“It’s possible. I’m not saying that’s what you have. I’m saying that it’s something to look into.” She explains.

“Is… Is something wrong with me?” Stan asked worriedly.

“No, not in the way you are thinking. Sometimes an illness can affect you mentally. This disorder in a sense is your brain battling you for many reasons. It could be something simple like checking to make sure you turned off a light in your room to something as complex as making sure every book is color-coded along with being in alphabetically order.” She gestures with her hands.

“You know… That kinda sounds like you, Stanny. I mean… I’m not saying it’s a bad thing… I just… You do have little quirks that you do a lot. I never really thought about it because that’s just who you are. Just like I have ADHD.” He points out.

“Okay, say I have this… illness. What is talking to my doctor going to do?” Stan turned his attention back to Mrs. Vivan.

“Well, they could recommend you to a therapist who could help you talk through these issues or even some medication that can help ease your mind. You can’t always control how your brain works despite many people thinking that you can. Your brain is wired differently than another student who doesn’t deal with the issues you face.” She comments before sitting up.

“Why… Why am I like this then?” Stan asked quietly, not meeting her gaze.

“Most people who have this illness either get it genetically or through their environment. In some cases, both of those things can play a role. Does that mean that you have it? No, it’s just something to think about. Some people just like order. Others need that order to function properly.” She explains as Richie glances at Stan who swallowed thickly.

“Thanks, Mrs. Vee.” Richie snags Stan’s arm before tugging him towards the door.

“Uh--If you want to retake the test still, Stanley. Just come on Monday and ask!” She calls as Richie waves to her in thanks.

“You okay?” Richie asked as they started for the exit of the school.

“No, what the fuck… Do you… Do you think I’m crazy?” Stan croaked out around a tightening throat.

“What? No! Jesus, dude! I would never think that. Look, like she said. It’s possible you don’t have it. That being said, it… it wouldn’t hurt. Maybe they can help you so you aren’t as stressed anymore. I’m worried one day that stress is going to kill you…” Richie laughs, but it sounds forced.

“Rich… You know I’m not… I’m sorry that I’ve been worrying you so much.” Stan whispered when he felt Richie’s fingers course through his hair.

“Of course I’m gonna worry about you, dipshit. I’m your boyfriend. That’s what boyfriend’s do. They worry and love each other. Look, if you don’t wanna talk about it anymore then we won’t. I’m here for you and you alone. But… Don’t think that if you do have OCD… that I’m not gonna love you or something. I loved you before… and I’ll love you after.” He explains when Stan looked to him with a wobbly smile.

“I love you too… You don’t think I’m broken? I mean… Look at my fucking family.” He laughs when Richie grins gently.

“Can’t be any worse than mine, baby bird. Besides, you think I’m broken because I have ADHD?” He questioned, causing Stan to look at him like he grew two heads.

“Are you an idiot? Of fucking course, not!” Stan huffed.

“Then why are you any different?” Richie asked as Stan swallowed softly before their foreheads touch.

“Thank you… I really don’t know what I’d do without you.” He whispered when Richie grins.

“I think you’d manage, but since I’m here. I make your entire life so much easier!” Richie placed a hand on his chest like he was some knight.

“More like you are the reason I’m stressed all the time.” Stan resorts back with a quirk of his brow.

“Blasphemy! By my own boyfriend of all things!” He cried in a high-pitch voice, making Stan laugh before he pushed Stan away. “Ah! Assault!” He dramatically flopped to the ground when Stan glanced around the roads to make sure no one was around.

“You’re a little gremlin,” Stan comments as Richie looks up to him with a grin. “But you’re my little gremlin.” He snorts and leans down before kissing Richie who immediately kissed him back.

“You’re goddamn right I am! The best fucking gremlin that this world will ever know!” Richie exclaims before standing up and dusting himself off.

“No, no touching me. We’re going to your place to get you some new clothes.” Stan comments, putting out a hand to stop Richie who pouts.

“Maybe we can look at some comics. I heard the others were going to the Quarry today, but I’d rather hang out with you.” He grins as Stan smiles.

“Okay, maybe… maybe you can convince me to talk to my parents about everything.” Stan whispered when Richie snorts.

“Ah, my darling dear Staniel… I can try my best, but your head is as thick as fucking iron. So it’ll take me a few tries.” He chuckles, causing Stan to push him back onto the ground. “Ah! Wait! Stan!” Richie cried as Stan started to walk away. “Wait! You ass! Stan!” He scrambled to stand up when Stan finally glanced back at Richie.

Stan offers him a warm smile that was saved for only Richie. Maybe tomorrow he would face this… maybe it wouldn’t be for another few months if not years… But one thing was certain. As long as he had Richie… Even if he did have OCD or even if he didn’t. He knew that he was going to be okay because Richie loved him for being him.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 213: blahblahblahSIXQUIRKS

Previously on BnHA: Baby Ochako stole the show for a few pages as Ochako thought back to her childhood and the first time she saw a hero in action and wanted to be like them and help people who looked like they were in trouble. And more recently during the Basement arc, she saw Deku struggling and thought, “who protects the heroes when they need protecting?” So with that nice segue, we cut back to the present, with Deku freaking out and Ochako trying to calm him down and eventually realizing he had no control. So she called on Shinsou to brainwash him, which he did by telling Deku he wanted to fight him again. And miraculously the brainwashing worked, and the quirk died down and retreated back into Deku’s arm. But then Deku found himself back in the OFA Happy Funky Dream Time Zone, being accosted by some beefy aggressive bald dude with goggles. He told Deku he’d gotten it all wrong, and accused him of not listening. “We told you that you’re not alone!” He said Deku’s quirk wasn’t something he could use casually while distracted any more, and told him to pull himself together.

Today on BnHA: Aggressive Bald Dude explains that the crazy new power Deku just used is actually his quirk, Blackwhip. To make a long story short, Deku can use all of the quirks from the previous wielders of OFA. Something something OFA is getting stronger, something something Quirk Singularity blah blah blah. Anyway, so Deku accidentally activated Blackwhip due to his strong feelings and his wanting to capture Monoma. Baldy warns Deku that if he wields his power in anger, it will respond accordingly, and that he needs to have control. He tells Deku he will eventually manifest six different quirks, and that he is the one who will complete One for All. Then he wishes him good luck and vanishes. Deku wakes up in the aftermath of all this strangeness, only to immediately be attacked by Monoma, who knows an opening when he sees one I guess. Everyone else from Teams A and B chooses this moment to arrive as well, and things quickly escalate into a melee battle. Shinsou challenges Deku, and we cut to the teachers who are watching nearby. A thoughtful-looking Aizawa tells the other teachers to let the battle continue.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my mostly-unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’m caught up with the manga now at chapter 224, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

lol

Kirishima you never told me your ancestor was a bearer of OFA

I really like this guy. what’s your name dude

(ETA: jesus Horikoshi would it kill you to name such an important character though. at least let us know which number he is. give us something)

and this conversation just keeps getting better!

“I don’t have a mouth.” “oh shit you don’t have a mouth. well THAT IS JUST FINE don’t you worry”

so Deku can see this guy much more clearly than OFA Primo in his previous dream. and on top of that, he’s now fully aware that it’s not a dream at all

also I really like TryHarder’s face. it’s just a nice face

he seems tough but kind

ahhhhh it’s another image of the previous 8

(ETA: so is that really you up there, Katsuki? is a part of you “actually alive inside One for All”, deep inside Izuku’s soul or whatever? just waiting for Deku to finally figure this shit out? so you can finally pop up at a critical plot moment and be all “hah, so you can finally see me. took you long enough, you damn nerd” and then give him Mystical Advice or some shit I guess? what level of shipping is that. when a piece of character A’s soul or will or whatever is literally chilling out inside character B’s soul. honestly I still don’t even know what to think about this fucking theory, because I would lose my damn shit. it just seems so ridiculously catered to Everything I Want that even pondering it feels absurdly self-indulgent. and how would it even work. ahghghg. anyways.)

there had better be at least one more girl besides Shimura, otherwise I’m gonna go on a ranting spree just like the JP Hero Billboard Charts all over again

I wonder when Toshinori’s outline will become more visible

and also when will Deku get to talk to Shimura?? her vestige has been clear right from the start. TALK TO HER AND GET THE GOSSIP ON HER SON! YOUR DAD!!

she probably knows so many embarrassing things. this is the true reason why All Might didn’t tell him about this shit back at the sports festival

okay so TryHarder is starting to fade now and he’s like “oh shit looks like I’m on a time limit”

so he’s telling Deku to listen up

YESSSSSSSSS

I wonder how many people guessed this before it was revealed. Horikoshi did an excellent job making it look like his power was just out of control again, honestly. this probably came out of left field for a lot of people

since I unfortunately can’t give you a genuine shocked reaction now, let me instead try to summarize my response when I first came across this spoiler.

DRAMATIZATION:

me: [reading through a post that didn’t seem to contain any spoilers that I didn’t already know] haha what a fine post

post: [gets to a part where it’s like “warning, spoilers” and then just JUMPS RIGHT INTO THE SPOILER RIGHT AWAY without any further ado]

me: [not understanding what just happened yet] wait what

post: blahblahblahSIXQUIRKS

me: [still hasn’t fully processed yet due to my sleepy brain] huh what. six

me: ...

me: wait WHAT

and at this point my brain finally kicked into gear, and it just hit me all at once that (1) I knew there was gonna be more OFA stuff coming up (back when I did the recap for Deku VS Shinsou way back in the sports festival arc, someone mentioned that the manga had gotten into the OFA Past Avatars shit again recently -- this was back in like September -- and so it was kind of in the back of my mind ever since then, just waiting to be remembered at a critical moment), (2) said OFA stuff would presumably consist of him learning to communicate with the Ghosts of OFAs Past in precisely the way that All Might said he couldn’t, (3) I also knew from a comment in this post that there was some power-up coming up for Deku at some point that was considered a spoiler, and lastly (4) the math added up. this last part just came to me in a whoosh. I have no idea how it all came together so quickly. but some very logical part of me waltzed in holding a corn cob pipe and was all, “you know, if Deku is the 9th OFA user and he, All Might, and OFA Prime didn’t have quirks*, that means there were six remaining OFA users who presumably did,” and I was like “NOOOOOOOOO WAAAAAAY?!” and I started freaking the fuck out. so anyway that’s how it all happened god bless

(ETA*: okay so technically Prime did, but his quirk is OFA, so. like. doesn’t count.)

anyways I really went off on a spiel there. let’s drag our focus back to the present day can we please

so TH is all “our quirks all merged with the core of OFA and have just been sitting here chilling inside it for like aaaaages”

gotta say the visual of this helps a lot. so the quirks are in that tiny lil marble in the middle of Primo’s back, buried deep within all of those flames of power

oh shit wait, did we say “tiny lil”

hmm. is this that quirk singularity bullshit that Seiji was talking about all the way back in the Babysitting Arc. I jump around between translations so much that I didn’t notice until very recently that the word “singularity” was being used in odd ways, and that it was also the word used to describe that phenomenon of quirks evolving until they’re beyond the user’s control

so is this. that

so TH says that One for All itself is growing. but like, look at how he says it though

that is a lot of ominous emphasis there

and Deku’s thinking “but why? what caused this?”

which, I’m glad he thought that, because here I was thinking it was just some natural phenomenon that All Might and Shimura for whatever reason never unlocked. but just like that he’s made me realize that this might be tied in to AFO somehow. didn’t he say just a couple chapters ago that he could hear the voice of his dead bro?

(ETA: yeah, listen guys, there is some shady shit going on here. part of it is the quirk singularity stuff, I’m sure, but there’s a lot of suspiciously coincidental stuff happening. but I will tell you more about my thoughts on this in a separate post, I think, because it’s something I’ve been pondering for a while now and I think it’s better suited to its own theory post.)

oh but TH says that right before the power erupted out of him, Deku was probably thinking something like “GETTIM”

and Deku’s sweating and thinking that he was indeed thinking about capturing Monoma

yeah to beat the shit out of him for insulting your boyfriend

so presumably he activated this quirk somehow which is meant to be a capture quirk?

OOOH

IT’S SEXY

that was honest to god my first thought. look at how elegant it is when he uses it. nothing like Deku’s out-of-control Venom rampage

here. this is what it reminds me of

ah, I see. so TH says that OFA’s power has been added to the black whip quirk now, so now it’s like it’s on steroids

AHH

DON’T DO THAT ALL SUDDENLY, HOLD UP, THIS WAS JUST GETTING INTERESTING

ah shit. so he’s starting to fade away

but you do exist! you’re real! you live on inside the quirk!

so you hear that, All Might? when you inevitably die your stupid fucked up tragic death that poor Nighteye foresaw and was tormented by, once you’re done ripping my heart to pieces, you can come back and still give Deku mentor advice within his mind. like Dumbledore in Deathly Hallows, only with less “sorry about dumping you on your abusive relatives and raising you to be a sacrificial lamb”

anyways the point is the two of you are bonded forever within OFA now, and that’s a comforting thought that I’m gonna hold onto for when shit eventually gets Real, however far along down the road that may be

oh okay good, before he goes he’s giving Deku advice on how to control it

he says that if Deku wields the power in anger, the power will respond accordingly

(ETA: and there’s literally a flashback panel of Monoma being all “REMEMBER WHEN BAKUGOU DESTROYED SOCIETY” lmao. just to remind everyone yet again of what exactly it was that set him off.)

good thing he’s not an empathetic young shounen hero prone to being roused to action and acting impulsively to the point where that was literally the deciding factor that made All Might choose him. oh wait. oh shit

but TH does say that it’s fine to get angry and that anger is one source of power

wow. just let that sink in for a second. so here’s a wise old mentor ghost actually telling the hero that he doesn’t have to be some perfect zen monk all the damn time. damn. hey TH I really do like you my dude

but anyways, so “that’s exactly why you must have careful control over that anger”

so basically you can use it to power up your quirk, but you gotta keep a rein on it otherwise we’ll wind up with a repeat of what just went down

YESSSSSSS AWWWWWW HERE IT GOESSSSSS

and that was the sound of fans across the world either ragequitting or losing their fucking shit in excitement lol

but okay, so me personally, I fucking love it. I know fandom is somewhat divided on whether he’s going to be too overpowered, but look at him! he has his fucking hands full just getting a handle on this one single new quirk! it’s not like he’s gonna just master this and the other five overnight. basically this is a brand new challenge for him which will take quite some time (if not the remainder of the series) for him to get a handle on, and which will make for much more interesting and unpredictable battles from here on out. and what with All Might gone, and us having pretty much seen the limits of what Endeavor can handle now, I gotta say it seems like we’re gonna need this sooner than later

(ETA: especially with the recent reveal of just what he’s going to be up against. bad guys are not fucking around holy shit.)

and strangely, this also makes me excited as a Bakugou fan because I still firmly believe that the two of them will remain head to head as the series progresses. which means that Bakugou is going to get a hell of a lot stronger himself. I don’t know how, but I have faith in the series to make it happen, and I’m looking forward to that as well

anyway, so TH is fading away, but he really has a lot of confidence in Deku and I love it

“you’re going to be the one who completes One for All.” fuck yeah. you hear that Deku? we all agree this is your destiny kiddo

and now we’re finally cutting back to the real world yaaaaaay

so Ochako is frantically shaking him

her slap probably did hurt. she’s fucking strong as hell. but he’s all right

so she’s setting him down and he’s realizing that the quirk has vanished (ah yes, that’s right, he went into that trance OFA dream state as soon as Shinsou’s quirk activated, and he was pretty out of it when the quirk was receding)

and she’s explaining that they were able to calm it down with Shinsou’s quirk. thanks for the assist Shinsou!

so like is this battle still on though or what lol. I think that Deku’s team should concede and call it a day because yikes

so Ochako’s asking him if he’s okay now and he’s just now realizing that she’s all banged up too. I guess that black whip packed a punch

HEY WHAT

FUCKING HELL MONOMA, YOU LITERALLY DON’T EVEN KNOW IF HE’S OKAY YET AND YOU’RE PULLING THIS SHIT ANYWAY. CAN YOU GIVE IT A REST FOR TWO FUCKING SECONDS OMG

also did he just snatch OFA?? I’ve been wondering for ages what would happen if he did that, and I gotta say most of my speculation didn’t end very well for him

anyways, sigh, so he’s whapping Deku with the giant bolt he just rode in there on. Yanagi’s quirk combined with Kodai’s quirk

and Deku’s stupidly shouting “Monoma!” and he’s lucky that Monoma didn’t just activate Shinsou’s quirk right there and then

and now Ochako is charging in yessssssssss!!!

FUCK HIM UPPPPPPP OCHAKO lol

ahh but here come more giant flying objects crashing down at them

and now Yanagi is asking Monoma if he’s all right and he’s complimenting her on her good timing

well would you look at this

so are we just going to have a big fucking brawl right here and now then

Kodai’s using her size quirk to block Mina and Mineta’s attacks, and it occurs to me to wonder what level of acid Mina was flinging at them. you know, Mina’s someone who could be pretty fucking deadly if she wanted to. they’re lucky she’s not on the villain side; with her charisma and creativity and fucking acid quirk she could probably take over the world with ease

anyway so now this is happening

honestly, Vlad and Aizawa, you really might as well call the fight off now lol

or don’t. because this is still entertaining

meanwhile Deku and Ochako are watching from above

“you wanna go get some burgers or something”

lol are you gonna help your teammates out or are you just gonna crouch there all day

Deku’s thinking back on TH’s words about how he needs to be in control of his heart and how if he wields his power in anger shit’s gonna get wrecked

uh oh

Shinsou being a sneaky sneak. but they owe him one though

lol it didn’t do much though

you tried, Shinsou

Deku’s narrating that he’s got so much going on in his head right now he can barely think, but he knows he can’t allow himself to go out of control and hurt everyone again

and now we’re cutting to the teachers who have snuck onto the stage and are watching from the shadows

Vlad’s asking Aizawa what they should do

Aizawa you’re so fucking hot as always good grief. I like your thoughtful face as you ponder how to address this later on, while also thinking that in the meantime you wanna keep watching and see how your protege fares against your problem child

haha okay

THE 5TH SET SHALL CONTINUE, EVERYONE! LOOKS LIKE THE BATTLE’S BACK ON FOLKS

next issue has a color page yaaaay. should be the 4th popularity poll results at long last if I’m not mistaken. MIRIO’S REVENGE. or mine, if he’s not represented the way he should be

meanwhile watch fucking Hawks be in like 1st place. except he’s not unseating the big three, probably, but after that who knows. sky’s the limit, and this boy can fly, so

(ETA: motherfucker made it all the way up to 4th place lol called it. apparently I missed when the results were originally announced back with chapter 207. still not sure how. but anyways I’ll post all my thoughts about it tomorrow lol)