#my demon there is a perfectly good bookshop for you to live in

[theravenmuse]

Disaster puppy checklist:

- Jobless

- Long depression naps

- Living out of car

- Changes hair color in desperate bid to feel SOMETHING

- “What’s the point of it all?”

- Still too scared to tell Azi how he feels because that relationship is literally THE ONLY THING he has left in this world

[roseserpentpress]

Comments and fic links below! (PS: click to see not crap quality photos/videos)

First finished ficbind for 2024, and first that I actually tried my hand at gold leafing (compared to previous use of gold inking). The gilding uses a hand-painted on glue and then the gold sheet overload and rubbed off; since the glue is put down not flat it adds a bit of texture to it, much like embroidery which I found cool. The design was based off a old cover design which I altered slightly to fit for the title of the book; been wanting to use one of the designs for a very long time now so rather chuffed to use one this time round, and (generally) well please with the typesetting. I actually painted the cover all in one long day with one piece running in the background during the holidays, lol. Two photos below are WIP photos and one including one of my su-purr-visors on my very cluttered desk. He's since passed due to being hit by a car, so the photos of him supervising me for this fanbind is something special to me.

The book itself contains mainly the Trigun vashwood fic Trillium and Ivy and upon remembering that there's a few other shorter stories involved, it became an impromptu anthology of the series. So overall it contains:

Trillium and Ivy (E, 80k)

Nick Wolfwood is the new director of Conrad-Chapel Funeral Home in May City, located across the street from Saverem Greenhouse & Landscaping. Over time, the owner, Vash, gets to know Nick and introduces him to the rest of the neighborhood, including local busybodies and married feminist bookshop owners Meryl and Milly. Vash and Nick are inexorably drawn to each other until they have to start admitting their feelings.

But Vash's brother, co-owner of the garden center, hasn't left his past as far behind as the twins had hoped when they started their lives over in May.

Raise a Glass to the Turnings of the Season (G, 7k)

A collection of small ficlets set in the universe of Trillium and Ivy, a modern AU in which Wolfwood runs a funeral home across the street from Vash and Knives' garden center.

Regarding the subjects of hospital visits, body image issues, adoption, laundry, and more.

I've seen all the demons that you've got (T, 8k)

The Hollywood-glam-slash-mad-scientist meet cute is going perfectly well, thank you. Except for all the anxiety, loneliness, insomnia, nightmares, body dysmorphia, identity struggles, poor communication, stalkers, arson, kidnapping, drugs, and concussions.

Other than those things... Knives might actually be onto a good thing in his life for once.

[A brief look into Knives' experience during Trillium and Ivy, a modern AU in which Wolfwood runs a funeral home across the street from Vash and Knives' garden center.]

[addledmongoose]

Good Omens Fanfic Friday (20 Sep 2024)

Because I finished my first draft of my latest (a Reverse Omens AU), and because two separate bangs are starting to come out this month, I have a really long list of (mostly short) stories to recommend this week. And if you like your GO fanfic smut-free, this is the list for you. Only one of these stories is rated E.

These first three aren't part of any bang.

Tadfield Zoo (40K; Rated E) by @groovynightstrawberry

Human AU. Crowley is the zoo's herpetologist. Aziraphale is the new vet. Crowley needs a plus one for his cousin's wedding, and Anathema has a great idea.

***

There’s no algorithm for the ineffable (12K; Rated T) by @thinkinginscripts

Human AU. A lovely, angst-free short with a lot of wonderful witty dialogue between the Ineffable Husbands.

Aziraphale Fell has been running Heavenly Matches, bespoke dating concierge for queer professionals looking for serious relationships, for over twenty years. His success rate is unsurpassed.

His new client, Mr Crowley, is just lovely - there are plenty of candidates interested in taking him to dinner. But after three dates with three perfect men, Crowley's not even sure what he wants anymore.

***

Flowers From Hell (42K; Rated T) by @entanglednow

I loved this story so much. Set post-notpocalypse, Aziraphale makes an effort to get more involved in Crowley's interests, especially his love of gardening. I don't want to spoil it, but I can say you will absolutely fall in love with Ivy.

***

These shorts are part of the GO Fairy Tale Minibang. There are a lot of stories in this collection, so be sure to check them out if you like fairy tales.

The Marriage of Robin Redbreast and the Wren (9K; Rated G) by @starryfull13

A Scottish tale about a wild red-breasted robin and a wren of the Royal court.

***

A Warrior in a Garden (9.8K; Rated T) by @snarky-synesthete

Set post-scene after Wessex, Aziraphale is a Knight of the Table Round when Crowley shows up to sow discord as Morgana la Fey. This story could have easily fit in the GO world like an extended Wessex minisode.

***

The True(ish) Tale of Hansel and Gretel (4K; Rated G)

Aziraphale arrives in a small town to find several of the village children missing and goes to find the witch responsible, only to stumble upon a lovely, ginger-haired demon he hasn't seen in a few years.

***

The Bounds of Gold (18K; Rated T) by @suavissimapenna

Human AU. Nice twist on the Rumplestilskin story.

All Aziraphale wants is to Illuminate a book commissioned by the royal family, but a gold shortage in the kingdom means he has to use a cursed spell book to spin straw into gold. All Crowley wants is to escape the curse that's bound him to the spell book for centuries. When the royal family finds out about Aziraphale’s new skill, things go to hell in a handbasket. A Rumplestilskin AU.

***

When The Lanterns Are Lit (5.7K; Rated G) by @the-ineffable-dance

Deep in The Wood, pixies Aziraphale and Crowley live a life of carefree delight. But when a doorway into Faerie appears, Aziraphale and Crowley have to work together to help two lost human boys admit the feelings they have for each other... and maybe recognize their own feelings along the way!

***

These stories are part of the Do It With Style Silver Screen bang. There are a lot more stories in the works, so be sure to check it out.

The Bookshop Around the Corner (18K; Rated G) by @luinlothana

It's You've Got Mail in the GO universe. This is NOT a human AU. It's the story of angel who doesn't want to sell books and a demon who is feeling a wee bit guilty about one of his plans coming to fruition.

***

The Crowley Family Values (11K; Rated T) by @ezomind-the-other-one

Human AU. As the name implies, this is a crossover fic with the Addams Family Values. If you don't know the other IP, you might struggle a bit simply because the dark humor can seem odd, but if you do know the Addams Family, you'll find the story fits perfectly with the style of humor.

[indigovigilance]

Sovereignty, Citizenship, and the Bookshop

Credit to @flameraven for scripts

Read on Ao3 at: Sovereignty, Citizenship, and the Bookshop (1702 words) by indigovigilance Summary: The rules regarding who may enter the bookshop, and who may give others permission to enter the bookshop, are revealed by events rather than exposition. Parallel themes surround the Bentley. In this meta I generate a theory of sovereignty and citizenship as it pertains to the Bookshop, and what that implies about a statement Crowley makes and Aziraphale's final decision in S2E6.

What actually is the Bookshop?

First, Aziraphale explains to Crowley:

S2E5: AZIRAPHALE: We're perfectly safe in here. Technically, this bookshop still counts as an Embassy.

But then, speaking to Shax, Aziraphale further defines the bookshop:

AZIRAPHALE: Out of the question. Might I remind you, that this bookshop is technically an independent embassy. Being a former outpost of Heaven, and as such…

Which doesn't actually make any sense.

An embassy, by definition, is a satellite of another larger nation. It is usually the residence of an ambassador, and is considered the "soil" and jurisdiction of the home country, regardless of where it is in the world: "An embassy is considered “foreign soil,” meaning that it operates under the jurisdiction and laws of the home country, not the host country (the country where the embassy is physically located)." [ext source]

So an embassy, by its basic definition, cannot be independent. It's an oxymoron. I'll interpret this to mean that the Bookshop constitutes its own nationstate (and that Aziraphale just doesn't say it that way because he's a funky little guy).

Bookshop: A Sovereign Nation of Two

There has been extensive discussion about why Crowley seems never to have told Aziraphale that he was living in his car, and why, if/when Aziraphale figured it out, he didn't say anything about it. (I wrote a meta discussing how we know that Aziraphale knows by the beginning of S2E4 that Crowley is living in his car. Additionally, in S2E6, Aziraphale doesn't seem to look particularly surprised when Crowley announces to the room that he's tired of living in his car; you can interpret this as being distracted and phased out but I don't think Aziraphale is ever so dissociated that he would miss a statement like that and simply not react. So by then, he certainly knows.)

I posit that Crowley did not ask to move in and would have refused to do so even if offered for one very simple reason: moving in would have made him a citizen of Bookshop, and therefore a point of vulnerability for Aziraphale. Because as he explains to Shax in S2E3, he can't technically invite her in:

SHAX: if you won't let me in… CROWLEY: Not technically something I can do.

Of course, Crowley is a demon: he could be lying. But let's take the statement at face value, since Shax, also a demon, who seems reasonably familiar with the rules of entry, doesn't question it. So Crowley, by never establishing citizenship, ensures that he can never be coerced or tricked into letting anyone into the Bookshop. He maintains his foreign entity status on purpose to protect Aziraphale.

One more note, in passing: Crowley stays at the shop in S2E3 and S2E4, but he has been charged by Aziraphale to "mind the bookshop, and Gabriel." His role is more akin to a house-sitter than a houseguest. He's there on work visa, and it does not establish citizenship.

So Crowley isn't a citizen of Bookshop. But someone other than Aziraphale is.

S2E1: MAGGIE: I can be out of here in two weeks. AZIRAPHALE: Out of here? Why? Don't you like it anymore? MAGGIE: Oh, Mr. Fell, I love this shop! I've loved it since I was a baby. But I know how behind I am on rent. (…) MAGGIE: You can't just forgive me eight months' rent. AZIRAPHALE: Oh, I can. I'm very good at forgiveness. It's one of my favorite things. Now, you have paid your rent, I have my music, and I know exactly what I'll be doing for the next 21 minutes. [he giggles and leaves] (creepiest most disturbing giggle in all of cinematic history BUT ANYWAYS)

We've established that Maggie not only is a tenant of land owned by Aziraphale, but that her accounts are all paid up. Her citizenship (or at least, permanent residency) is secure. If simply renting out the space wasn't enough, we learn that she is a fourth-generation resident of the space owned by Aziraphale, which started inside the bookshop itself, and so Maggie may have been born into citizenship. Either way, the consequences of this arise in S2E6:

AZIRAPHALE: Maggie, what just happened? MAGGIE: I… I think I might have just told them they could come in.

Crowley can't tell demons that they can come in. But Maggie can. My explanation for this is because she actually lives (and is up on her rent) in a territory of the nation of Bookshop. It could be posed that Maggie can invite demons in because she is a guest of the ball, and so this is a temporary power, but Crowley was a "guest"/house-sitter and didn't have this power, so I reject this explanation and affirm it as a citizenship/residency power.

The Metatron's Offer

At time of writing, the fandom has spent two months trying to figure out why Metatron offered Aziraphale the job of Supreme Archangel. Was it to get him back into Heaven where he can keep a closer eye on him? Was it to get him away from Crowley? Did Metatron realize that he is a wellspring of power and wants to tap into it for nefarious purpose?

I'm going to propose a different, much simpler reason: he needed to get Aziraphale out of the bookshop. To explain that, we look to a line that Crowley delivers during the Conversation:

CROWLEY: I mean, if Gabriel and Beelzebub can do it, go off together, then we can. Just the two of us. We don't need Heaven, we don't need Hell, they're toxic. We need to get away from them, just be an us. You and me, what do you say? AZIRAPHALE: Come with me… to Heaven. I'll run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference. CROWLEY: You can't leave this bookshop.

Hang on, didn't Crowley just say that they should run off together? Why is he now saying that he can't leave the bookshop? These statements seem contradictory, but through the lens of sovereignty, they're not. You see, if Aziraphale goes off to Alpha Centauri without rejoining Heaven, the Bookshop still belongs to him and constitutes the sovereign nation over which he rules. It is the anchor and touchstone of his independent status. What ever new residence they establish will, in turn, be an embassy of that "independent embassy." The Bookshop then (I hypothesize, and posit that Crowley does too) grants Aziraphale protection from Heaven and Hell no matter where he is in the universe.

A Brief Aside on the Mechanics of Satellites

We have some evidence that Bookshop rules extend to wherever Aziraphale happens to be "residing," in that when Aziraphale borrows Crowley's car, Shax must trick him into giving him permission to enter (S2E4):

HITCHHIKER: I'm so sorry, can you be an angel and give me a lift? Only m-my car's broken down and my phone's dead. Just to the next town, there's a garage there. AZIRAPHALE: Oh… yes, well… I suppose you better climb in, then.

Thus establishing that, theoretically, Crowley and Aziraphale could "go off together" and still have the protection of the Bookshop.

The Consequences of Aziraphale's Final Decision

Crowley tells Aziraphale that he cannot leave the bookshop, but then we know that Aziraphale takes the job and ascends to Heaven. Metatron looks extremely relieved. No sooner do they ascend than Muriel enters the bookshop, where we know Metatron has placed them. Let's take this point by point.

The Bookshop is no longer a sovereign nation

By rejoining Heaven, Aziraphale has reclaimed his citizenship as an angel of Heaven. I'm going to go ahead and say (for sake of argument and because it is thematically consistent) that Heaven does not honor duel citizenship. Therefore, Aziraphale has given up his citizenship of Bookshop, but as it still belongs to him, it is now territory subject to the jurisdiction of Heaven. Muriel has been placed there as a representative of Heaven. Having been (we can surmise) the only "independent embassy" in existence where both angels and demons had to ask permission to enter, it is once again a good and proper embassy of Heaven.

This is important because now, neither Aziraphale nor Crowley have any place to go that is protected from both Heaven and Hell.

Muriel has unfettered access to Aziraphale's collection of books

My very simplistic theory for why Metatron went to so much trouble to get Aziraphale to cede control of the Bookshop is that he needs access to his collection of books. Specifically, he needs a certain Scrivener who enjoys reading to set up camp there and peruse every single book. This is because he is looking for something.

Gabriel left Heaven with a large box; he arrived at the Bookshop with an empty box. We can punt around all sorts of possible reasons but let's say, for sake of conjecture, that Gabriel stole the Book of Life on his way out to protect himself and Beelzebub from erasure. We don't know where the Book is now, but Metatron (who doesn't know the box was empty) has good reason to believe that the Book of Life is somewhere in the bookshop. But it's too dangerous to admit that they've lost track of it, so the best way to find a Book in a bookshop is to get the owner out of there, install an avid reader as steward, and wait patiently.

Other consequences of this theory of citizenship

We are given to believe that Crowley and Aziraphale are both outcasts of Hell and Heaven, respectively, yet Aziraphale seems to be the only one of them that benefits from the protections of independence. We could say that it is because Aziraphale owns land, and so that allows him to establish a nationstate, whereas the Bentley does not, but since Aziraphale brings the protections of independence with him when he borrows the Bentley, that seems flimsy. I find it more likely that in S3 we're going to learn something about Crowley that explains why he lacks these protections, and if I dare to make conjecture, it will be the subject of another meta.

I didn't get around to a discussion of the consequences of Aziraphale throwing his halo and "declaring war," or that war declaration being maybe-cancelled by Crowley; suffice to say, that may again be it's own meta.

~~~

If you enjoyed this, you may enjoy: Honolulu Roast: the story of a coup

another meta on the topic of ownership re the Bentley by @ineffable-endearments can be found here.

~~~

edit: I was reminded by @rekishi-aka to note that in S1, Gabriel and Sandolphon walk right in, because at that time the bookshop is an embassy of Heaven. For all of S2 except the final 30 minutes, celestials all have to ask permission to enter, including Michael, Uriel, Saraqael, and Muriel, because the Bookshop is independent. After Aziraphale throws his halo, celestials just appear inside the Bookshop: by declaring war, Aziraphale has relinquished his protection. It's unclear whether it would have been reestablished by Crowley cancelling the war, but it's a moot point because then Aziraphale agrees to become the Supreme Archangel.

[chamyl]

What Aziraphale says / what Crowley hears

An analysis of that scene from Good Omens 2. Because the amount of times Aziraphale says one thing when he means another is astounding, as is how perfectly he and Crowley misunderstand each other.

Obviously, SPOILERS all over the place.

Let’s pick it up from the chat with the Metatron. He’s talking about his big projects, blah blah blah, and how he needs someone to run them and Aziraphale's the perfect angel for the job, and Aziraphale's first reply is:

 A: "I don't want to go back to Heaven. Where would I get my coffee?"

Meaning: I'm not ready to give up what I can have here on Earth, i.e. Crowley. Metatron, unlike Crowley, hears perfectly well what Aziraphale means, not what he says, because he replies offering him to bring Crowley along.

 Flashback ends, we switch back to the bookshop.

C: "He said what?"

Crowley is immediately offended at the mere suggestion. Heaven sucks and he's learned he's lesson, he's never going back.

Aziraphale doesn't notice the anger in his voice, too caught up in his dream of ruling Heaven with Crowley by his side and doing all the good he can for humanity. After having to sit by and watch awful things happen to good people for 6000 years, this is his Ultimate Dream™. He can change things AND he gets to keep Crowley.

(Of course we know Heaven's not going to give him so much freedom, but he wants this so much it makes him oblivious to the possibility he's being fooled.)

 A: "Everything like the old times! Only, even nicer."

Meaning: we can be safe, no Book of Life or other punishments hanging over our heads, and I can make Heaven, finally, what it was always supposed to be: a good place. A good place for you, Crowley, too.

 C: "Right. And you told him just where he could stick it, then?"

Crowley's too angry to tackle this gently. We watch Aziraphale's face fall.

 A: "Not at all."

 C: "Oh we're better than that, you're better than that, Angel!"

Meaning: how could you possibly believe this bullshit? After all that we've been through?

 C: "You don't need them. I certainly don't need them! Look, they asked me back to Hell I said I'm not gonna be joining their team. Neither should you."

For Crowley, Heaven and Hell are the same thing, just a different colour. He can't understand why Aziraphale wouldn't say no immediately.

 A: "But... well, obviously you said no to Hell, you're the bad guys."

Meaning: Hell was never supposed to be a good place. It was always supposed to be a group of demons making the humans' lives harder. How would you make the world better by working with hell? Of course you said no.

 A: "But Heaven... well it's the side of truth, of light, of good."

 C: "When Heaven ends life here on Earth, it'll be just as dead as if Hell ended it. Tell me you said no."

Here they move away from the actual problem, which is Aziraphale's delusional thoughts in regards to the potential for change in Heaven, to talk about the two of them instead.

He already knows Aziraphale didn't say no. He's asking him to change his mind and stay on Earth, which he will continue to do throughout the rest of this exchange.

 C: "Tell me you said no."

Again, tell me you'll change your mind. Tell me you'll stay here, with me.

 A: "If I'm in charge, I can make a difference."

 This is where it sinks in for Crowley that he's really about to lose Aziraphale. He panics and throws out his confession.

C: "Oh, God[1]. Right, okay. Right. I didn't get a chance to say what I was going to say I think I better say it now. Right, okay, yes, so... We've known each other a long time."

 Aziraphale is totally confused and has no idea where this conversation is going.

 C: "We've been on this planet for a long time. I mean, you and me. I could always rely on you. You could always rely on me. We're a team. A group. A group of the two of us."

 Now Aziraphale realises what's happening. At the worst possible time, Crowley is bringing up all the things they haven't talked about openly in 6000 years.

 C: "And we've spent our existence pretending that we aren't. I mean, the last few years, not really. And I would like to spend--"

[gif source]

Crowley swallows it back because he can't bring himself to say 'I would like to spend the rest of our existence together'. It's too much, it’s too big.

 C: "I mean, if Gabriel and Beelzebub can do it, go off together, then we can."

And there it is, clear as day, the confession. Gabriel and Beelzebub weren't friends, they very clearly had a romantic relationship, and Aziraphale looks absolutely SHOCKED by how explicit Crowley is being.

 C: "Just the two of us. We don't need Heaven, we don't need Hell. They're toxic."

Aziraphale shakes his head. He can't accept that Crowley would put Heaven and Hell on the same level.

 C: "We need to get away from them, just be an us. You and me, what do you say?"

Just like before Aziraphale wasn’t registering Crowley's anger, now Crowley doesn't pick up on Aziraphale's headshake, his shocked expression. He asks him what he thinks.

 A: "Come with me... to Heaven. I'll run it, you can be my second in command. We can make a difference."

This is so painful because they both want the same thing. To be together. But Aziraphale can't ignore the fact that he's just been given the chance to do so much good for everyone, and keeps pressing his point.

 C: "You can't leave this bookshop."

[gif source]

Crowley's not talking about the bookshop. He's brought up leaving for Alpha Centaury just a little while ago, a dream he still clings to. What he means is, you can't leave a place where you're safe and independent.

This is not what Aziraphale hears. He thinks Crowley is talking, literally, about the bookshop. That's why he says...

  A: "Oh, Crowley. Nothing lasts forever."

[gif source]

Meaning: I'm willing to sacrifice the bookshop to work towards the Greater Good. Even though it pains me.

What Crowley hears: it’s our relationship that was never meant to last forever. All things end, we're breaking up. And in fact his reaction is to put his sunglasses back on, defences back up, and say:

 C: "No. I don't suppose it does."

 Aziraphale misses the walls coming back up and smiles for a split second, thinking Crowley is agreeing with him. So he's shocked when Crowley says...

 C: "Good luck."

And starts to leave.

 A: "Good luck?! Cro--Crowley! Crowley come back! To Heaven! Work with me! We can be together! Angels... doing good!"

Aziraphale breaks down completely now. His dream is crumbling, not only Crowley won't join him, but Crowley is abandoning him altogether.

 A: "I... I need you!"

He cries out, desperately. Then he gets angry.

 A: "I don't think you understand what I'm offering you."

Safety. A chance to be together, out in the open. A chance to do good, save the world from a second Apocalypse. Full status as angel restored. He can't understand why in the world Crowley wouldn't want these things? They can fix Heaven together!

 C: "I understand. I think I understand a whole lot better than you do."

Crowley knows Heaven is only going to exploit and manipulate Aziraphale. But he doesn't insist, it's not what he does. In all their fights, Crowley's always been the one to run away in the face of conflict, and he's by the door, ready to go.

 A: "Well... then there's nothing more to say."

Meaning: Are you really going to leave me?

 C: "Listen. Do you hear that?"

 A: "I don't hear anything."

 C: "That's the point. No nightingales."

Possibly because this is their own coded language, this is the one time what Crowley means and what Aziraphale hears line up. That the relationship between them is coming to an end. There are no nightingales like the ones in Berkeley square, singing for them after their post-Apocalypse date.

 But then it's Crowley's turn to break down. He wasn't fast enough running out of the bookshop, his emotions caught up with him. He’s thinking about that lunch at the Ritz and the nightingales. And after what Maggie and Nina told him, what he himself has learned about love, he makes a last desperate attempt at fixing things.

 C: "You idiot. We could have been... us."

He grabs Aziraphale, forcefully kissing him. Aziraphale is shocked, doesn't know what to do with his hands, first he flails then he puts a hand on Crowley's back, as if about to relax, but then starts flailing again as he remembers he can't do this: he has to go to Heaven. Work for the Greater Good. He can't return the kiss.

[gif source]

He's basically sobbing when Crowley lets him go. Full-blown panic now, while Crowley watches him expectantly, hoping his last-resort strategy had some effect on his angel.

 But Aziraphale stutters and reaches for something to steady himself, some barrier to put up again between the two of them. Crowley is a demon, he's an angel. Crowley grabbed him and kissed him without asking first, Aziraphale is going to forgive him. There. Big red line between them.

 A: “I… I forgive you.”

[gif source]

He seems to regret it the moment the words have left his mouth. But it's too late. Crowley knows that the kiss didn't work, that there's nothing left to do now.

 C: "Don't bother."

[gif source]

And he leaves. Almost runs.

 Aziraphale is shaking all over. He presses his fingers to his mouth pretty hard, trying to replicate the feeling to process what just happened.

[gif source]

The Metatron was of course right outside, looking in, probably saw the whole thing going down. He takes advantage of the moment where Aziraphale is at his most vulnerable to press him to go, downplays their fight ("Always wanted to go his own way") makes disparaging comments about Crowley ("Damn fool questions too"), knocks down Aziraphale's excuses by entrusting the bookshop to Muriel.

 Aziraphale is torn, but after all, what else can he do? In his mind, Crowley abandoned him when he'd finally found somewhere safe for them to be together. And Aziraphale spit out that horrible 'I forgive you'. Even if he stayed now, he'd be all alone. And in Heaven, he gets a chance to do Good with a capital G.

 The Metatron tells him about very important plans to 'wrap things up'. Aziraphale looks back at Crowley, who’s standing by the Bentley, watching him.

But the Second Coming bomb the Metatron just dropped solidifies Aziraphale’s choice. Now more than ever he has to go up and do all he can. He steps into the elevator.

Crowley, completely alone now, looks at Nina and Maggie, each in their own shop, not together.

 And then both Aziraphale and Crowley do what they always do to deal with difficulties: Crowley drives away, probably to nowhere, just letting the car go, and Aziraphale swallows everything down and tries to put back on his polite, calm, jovial mask. He'll be damned if he'll not try his hardest to be the perfect angel for this job. He’s sacrificed too much.

[gif source]

[1] I don’t know that it’s a good idea to call on her right now, C.

[lookingatacupoftea]

They’re not talking (or are they?)

Please don’t tag or ask Neil about fan theories!

Thinking about how Crowley and Aziraphale seem to keep a lot from each other in S2, particularly Crowley keeping information from Aziraphale.

It’s perfectly possible that much of this is communicated between them offscreen or just doesn’t matter or is a victim of on-set rewrites. But it happens a lot in S2 and a few of these are pretty important details that appear to be deliberately kept secret. 

Things that Crowley knows that Aziraphale doesn’t (as far as we know):

Crowley is living in the Bentley (Aziraphale doesn’t know per Neil)

Crowley has been replaced as hell’s representative (unclear but some have speculated that Aziraphale doesn’t realize this until Shax tells him)

Beez’s offer (sort of revealed in the final fifteen)

BOL threat

Where Crowley goes in his tactical turtleneck during the Job minisode (speculative, could mean nothing)

Shax sniffing around the bookshop 

The memory snippets Jim shares while Aziraphale is in Edinburgh

That “it’s always too late” (could just be a nod to Crowley’s watch in the book)

Where Crowley goes the morning of the ball (speculative)

Crowley telling Jim that he was the one in heaven

Nina’s troubles with and breakup with Lindsay

What happened in heaven and the memory wipe threat

What N&M said to Crowley

Things that Aziraphale knows that Crowley doesn’t (as far as we know)

Maggie crying over Nina (edited to add: this is a weird one because Crowley does know this later but we don’t see Aziraphale tell him and he doesn’t observe her crying himself)

What Aziraphale wanted to tell Crowley when he came out of the Job memory

The Mason clue

What else Aziraphale did in Edinburgh (speculative)

Shax’s visit to the Bentley (oddly, Crowley seems happy to be lied to about this when Aziraphale returns - “that’s what we want to hear”)

What Aziraphale wanted to suggest to Crowley at the start of the demon attack (possibly irrelevant after the fact)

The full Metatron conversation (speculative)

This is in contrast to S1, where secrets are kept but they make sense to the narrative. Aziraphale keeps Agnes Nutter and his Tadfield research from Crowley because he’s stuck between a rock (heaven wanting Armageddon) and a hard place (Crowley wanting to kill the kid). And while neither tells the other directly about threats from other angels and demons, this again is all part of the tight narrative of S1 where they both know that every other celestial but them wants Armageddon.

I keep coming back to how they’re never alone together in S2. The regular pattern of their lives is disrupted from the start. Jim is always in the bookshop, plus other visitors show up, or they’re in public. And we see them being spied on constantly. 

Secret communication, therefore, is my best potential explanation. S2 gave us added context for S1, as lots of you lovely theorizers like @drconstellation, @vidavalor and @leftduck9986 have noted. What if the choppiness in S2 is from missing scenes we’ll get in S3? Cain’s Jawbone across multiple seasons?

I think changing POV (paging @somehow-a-human) is another option for some of these — that thing where people erroneously expect others to know what they know. But that doesn’t work for what seems to be deliberate omissions like the BOL threat or Shax in the Bentley.

I’m open to other ideas, including that last-minute on-set rewrites are to blame. Thanks for reading! This will be me tomorrow wishing I was paid to think about Good Omens:

[deramin2]

At the end of Good Omens S1 E6 Crowley and Aziraphale are sitting on the bench before handing off the package of artifacts and reading the prophecy. Aziraphale says he should go home to the bookshop. Crowley reminds him that the bookshop burned down. He offers Aziraphale to stay at his place. Aziraphale turns him down saying, "I don't think my side would like that." Crowley answers, "You don't have a side anymore. Neither of us do. We're on our own side." Even when Aziraphale had nowhere to go he was still more afraid of what them living together might mean and what it might end. That next step into the vast unknown.

According to Neil Gaiman, Crowley never told Aziraphale he was living in his car. So when Crowley lost his apartment and had no where to go, he ruled out asking Aziraphale for help or even letting on there was a problem so Aziraphale wouldn’t feel pressured. In the end of S1 the bookshop was still there and Aziraphale wouldn't have needed to move in anyway. But now Crowley has a long-term problem and doesn't feel like he can turn to the one person that might help him. Crowley knows he can be too fast for Aziraphale (even after 6,000 of slow burn), and this is too fast, so he holds back.

Analysis under the cut

I think it's a really interesting look into their dynamic. They love and want to protect each other, but there's still 6,000 years of pent up fear about really being together and what that really means. Aziraphale is still deeply worried about being rejected by heaven for his relationship. To the point that when their friendship and collaboration are discovered and heaven literally tries to kill him and kick him out, he's still worried about what they'll think. It's just so deeply embedded into how he restrains himself from what he really wants. He's torn.

The Metatron promising he can have both heaven and Crowley is everything he's ever wanted to hear. It's his ultimate wish. He can't imagine why anyone, even Crowley, wouldn't want to go back to heaven if given the chance. I'm sure even now he's sure he just needs to get settled, and then he'll work at persuading Crowley further. Crowley's just being stubborn and this is all perfectly fixable.

Aziraphale also has a long history of when he gets scared for Crowley's life he pushes him away. He'd rather Crowley be mad at him than Crowley be dead. So here they are with heaven and hell once again pissed at them for foiling their plans, but Aziraphale feels that if he goes back he can protect Crowley. He wants to just persuade Crowley to come with him, but if he can't at least he can keep him safe even if he can't keep him happy or maybe talk to him.

I think this is part of what Aziraphale means when he says "I forgive you." He also said that during the bandstand argument after Crowley curses out the great plan. Crowley claims he doesn't ever want to be forgiven. He doesn't want to go back to a heaven that would abuse him for millennia just because he asked questions. Crowley admitting he's in love goes against the great plan where demons and angels aren't supposed to fall in love. And while they just watched another angel and demon choose their love over heir "side," Aziraphale also watched them be banished with no way back and that utterly terrifies him.

Meanwhile Crowley poured his feelings into that kiss. They could have been together, really together, and he's is in love with Aziraphale and he's tired of not showing it. And from his perspective Aziraphale still rejected that. When push came to shove, Aziraphale still chose heaven over him and still refused to hear that heaven is toxic and he doesn't belong there. Crowley sees not belonging there as a positive. Aziraphale sees it as a terrifying condemnation.

Faced with losing Aziraphale, Crowley moved quickly and it was too much for Aziraphale's pent up fear. Which is exactly what Crowley was trying to prevent by sleeping in his car instead of looking to Aziraphale for help. He knew it would be too much and it was.

I do think a major theme of Season 3 (or however the story is continued) is that Aziraphale will realize he's been wrong and heaven will not support him but Crowley always will. They never manage to stay apart long. Crowley predicts in S1 E6 that there's just going to be a lull before the big one when heaven and hell both fight humanity. There's no way Aziraphale will go along with that. And maybe that's what it takes to finally break out and choose the unknown and Crowley.

[mimisempai]

It's ours now

Summary

A good book, in the comfort of his armchair, a cup of tea prepared by Crowley, make Aziraphale have a moment, realizing that this is his life now.

Notes

Where Aziraphale realizes he no longer needs to hope the evening will last... because Crowley will never leave.

On Ao3

Rating G -  1942 words

It was an autumn afternoon, and although the street was visibly bustling, the sounds outside were muffled by the windows of the bookshop. However, Aziraphale, comfortably seated in his armchair and engrossed in his novel, would hear nothing. 

So he couldn't help but jump slightly when two hands rested gently on his shoulders. 

"I'm sorry, Angel, I didn't mean to startle you," Crowley said softly before leaning over and planting a light kiss on his temple. 

Aziraphale shook his head and replied, "Not at all, my dear. I was just so absorbed in my reading that..."

"...that the outside world no longer mattered," the demon finished for him.

Aziraphale replied sheepishly, "That's about right."

Crowley smiled indulgently and replied, "Don't be embarrassed. It's just like watching you eat, it's always interesting to see you engrossed in something you love."

Then he straightened up and, pointing to the angel's cup, asked, "I see it's empty, I'll make you another one."

Aziraphale smiled and replied, "You really would be an angel to do that for me. "

Crowley grabbed the cup and replied with a playful smile, "I don't think so. You're the angel, remember?"

Aziraphale rolled his eyes and replied, "Idiot."

He heard Crowley chuckle slightly as he left to prepare his tea.

But after the demon left the room, Aziraphale didn't return to his reading. He didn't know why, but at that moment he had a strange feeling. 

Like a revelation.

There was nothing remarkable about the moment. 

It was an ordinary day.

A good book.

His old armchair.

A kiss on the temple.

It was perfectly ordinary.

Yet for Aziraphale, it felt extraordinary in that moment.

No miracle, no matter how great, had given him the sense of fulfillment he felt at that moment.

"Your tea, Angel."

Crowley's voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

"Thank you."

Crowley pressed a light kiss to his lips before turning to leave.

Aziraphale didn't know what motivated him, but he grabbed the demon's sleeve and held him back without saying a word.

"Angel?"

Aziraphale asked in a shy voice, "Would you mind staying with me for a while?"

Crowley, looking confused, replied, "Of course, but I thought you were reading."

Aziraphale shook his head and replied, "I don't feel much like reading now that you're here. I'd much rather spend some time with you and just talk or whatever."

Crowley smiled as he gently replied, "If you let me get a cup of coffee, I'm all yours."

Aziraphale didn't have time to react because Crowley had already crossed the few meters that separated him from the entrance of the bookshop and was leaving it to go to Nina's coffee shop.

Following him with his eyes, Aziraphale realized what was causing him to feel this moment of fulfillment. 

Or rather who.

Crowley.

The fact that Crowley was here.

Not for a visit.

Not for a few hours.

Not for a fleeting moment.

But living there for what seemed like forever.

With him.

It wasn't like all the times they'd always had to part. 

Both going home.

Alone. 

All the times he'd wanted to ask the demon to stay a little longer, just for a drink, just to talk a little more.

Aziraphale grabbed the bottle of wine and filled Crowley's glass, saying without looking at him, "I...I knew you would come through for me."

He couldn't help but give him a slight sideways glance before adding, "You always do."

The demon picked up his glass, raised it to his lips, and replied, "Well, you said 'trust me.'" 

Aziraphale retorted, just before taking a sip, "And you did." 

Turning his head toward him, he added, "You could've walked away. If you were truly as evil as you like to paint yourself, you would've done that."

As always, Crowley protested, but this time Aziraphale sensed he was more measured in his response than he had been earlier in the evening, "Nah. That's the trouble with you. You don't see things in black and white."

Aziraphale looked at him a little stung as he continued, "Sometimes you've just 'gotta blur the edges."

For the first time, Aziraphale also tempered his answer, "Well, maybe there is something to be said for the shades of gray."

Then, smiling slightly, he moved his glass toward the demon's, who toasted with him before replying, "Well, shades of... dark gray." and taking a sip.

Aziraphale, not to be outdone, replied, "Shades of a very light gray, I'd rather fancy."

They each took a sip, Aziraphale glancing back at him furtively. 

They continued to chat until the bottle was empty. 

Crowley had long since placed his hat on the table and removed his glasses. Aziraphale felt comfortable, his mind a little clouded by the alcohol, but not too much.

The candles, which had shrunk in size, still radiated a warm glow.

The angel had to admit that he didn't want the evening to end at all, so he felt a twinge of regret as he saw Crowley take his glasses and place them on his nose.

The sign of departure.

Aziraphale couldn't ignore the disappointment he felt. But he also knew that he had no right to ask the demon to stay. 

So, with a heavy heart, he watched as he put his hat on his head, tightened his tie, and buttoned up his jacket.

The demon stood up and said in an unusually soft tone, "Angel, after this more than eventful evening, I think it's time for me to go home." 

Stay!

But, of course, the angel said nothing and simply nodded before escorting Crowley out.

As he headed for the Bentley, Crowley turned back to him and said, "I'll see you when I see you!"

Aziraphale nodded and smiled, but his heart wasn't in it. He stayed on the doorstep until the lights of the Bentley had disappeared into the night.

How many times had they been to the restaurant since then, and Aziraphale always wished the evening would never end. 

Wishing that the moment would never come when Crowley would pull up in front of the bookshop. 

Wishing that the moment would never come when Aziraphale would have to get out of the car and go home. 

Alone. 

Never knowing when they'd see each other again.

The piano played a gentle melody as the waiter filled Aziraphale's glass. 

As he filled Crowley's glass, the angel took hold of his and said softly, smiling, "I like to think none of this would have worked out if you weren't just a little bit good person."

Crowley, smiling a little, replied in kind, looking at him, "And if you weren't, deep down, just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing."

There was something different in the demon's smile, and Aziraphale instantly rediscovered the atmosphere of that evening in 1941. 

The same soft, intimate atmosphere.

The one that made him want more.

The demon added, "Cheers. Then, taking his glass and raising it to the angel's, he continued, "To the world.

Aziraphale, raising his glass to the demon's, repeated, clinking their glasses, "To the world.

As they continued to eat and drink, they chatted as usual about anything and everything, laughed a little more at the expense of their camps, and Aziraphale felt full of a new exhilaration in the face of this new life.

A little scared, of course, but Crowley was there, so all would be well.

It was only when they noticed that the last tables had emptied that they realized the day was well underway. Crowley asked him softly, "Lift home?"

Aziraphale nodded, a little disappointed because he knew the moment he loathed was coming.

They were now parked in front of the bookshop.

Aziraphale knew he couldn't very well ask the demon to stay for a drink when they had just left the Ritz.

He looked at him and then, trying to keep his tone cheerful, said softly, "See you soon."

Crowley replied, "See you soon, Angel."

When?

But Aziraphale didn't want to seem clingy, so he shut up and opened the car door before getting out. Then he gave Crowley a little wave through the window before heading for the bookshop door.

But he couldn't help himself, so he turned and saw Crowley watching him. 

He hesitated for a moment.

He could still invite him in.

But what would he think?

By the time all the questions had crossed his mind, the Bentley had started.

Too late.

Aziraphale watched the car drive away and returned to the bookshop with the same disappointment in his heart.

"Angel?"

Once again, deep in thought, Aziraphale was jolted out of it by Crowley approaching, coffee cup in hand.

He said quietly, "You're back."

It wasn't a question.

It was just an acknowledgment.

An amazed acknowledgment.

Crowley chuckled slightly and raised an eyebrow, observing, "You seem surprised."

Aziraphale grabbed his cup of tea, got up, and headed for the sofa, Crowley following, coffee in hand.

They both sat down and the angel resumed, "I think I just realized how utterly real this all is."

Crowley frowned and asked, "Did you doubt it?"

Aziraphale shook his head and replied, "It's not that. It's just that today, for some reason, I realized how real our life is now. After all this time. I don't have to make excuses to ask you to stay. I don't have to ask you to stay. Because you're here. You're living here. Here with me. It must sound ridiculous, I know..."

Crowley chuckled softly, "After everything we've seen? No, it's not ridiculous. In fact, I'm surprised because I thought I was the only one who felt this way. All those times I didn't want to leave. When I hoped you'd ask me to stay. When I wished I'd had the courage to ask you if I could stay."

Aziraphale sighed, "All the time we wasted when all we had to do was be honest."

Crowley took the angel's hand, intertwined the fingers with his own, and said softly, "I don't know. Maybe neither of us was ready. But what we didn't do in the past doesn't really matter, does it? What matters is that we're here now, right?" 

He lifted the angel's hand and, bringing it to his lip, said, "Now I can have the nerve to do this." 

He planted a kiss on the palm of the angel's hand, then continued, smiling slightly, "And then this..."

He pulled the angel toward him, and as Aziraphale pressed against him, he wrapped his hands around him as Aziraphale slipped his arms around his waist, snuggling a little closer to him.

The angel sighed contentedly and added, "And this, too."

Crowley hummed into his hair and planted a light kiss on it. 

Aziraphale looked up and added, "I see what you mean. We probably weren't ready for any of this."

Crowley replied softly, "But we have plenty of time for that now," then bent his head and kissed the angel's lips tenderly. 

They remained entwined like this for a few moments, then Aziraphale straightened and grabbed his cup, taking a sip before asking the demon, "Do you have something to do?"

Crowley shook his head, "Nothing," then took a sip of coffee as the angel replied, "Perfect.

They stayed there, chatting as they drank.

It wasn't a fancy restaurant.

It was the old bookshop sofa.

It wasn't champagne or wine.

It was just tea and coffee.

But when the cups were empty, neither of them would have to find an excuse to prolong the moment.

Because this was their life now.

Simple and ordinary.

But it was real and it was theirs.

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story  🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Ineffable Growing Love series : here (After season 2)

Ineffable Husbands masterlist : here (Before season 2)

[ineffablydelighted]

[Cute Omens #4]

[Also called: Crowley gets j-e-a-l-o-u-ssss]

Right before Aziraphale leaves for Edimburg, ready to get inside the Bentley

Maggie: Oh, Mister Fell, wait! *runs towards him*

Aziraphale: Yes, Maggie? Hello?

Maggie: I just wanted to tell you again how grateful I am for... You know... *awkward shoulder balancing and smile* Not collecting the rent.

Aziraphale: *soft smile of an Angel* My pleasure, Maggie! No need to thank me everyday 😊

Maggie: You... You don't get it, do you?

Aziraphale: I... I'm not sure, now?

Maggie: Nobody does that anymore... People like you, I mean. They do no exist anymore. People are more like... your... *unsure but tries* boyfriend.

Aziraphale: Crowley? Oh, no, Maggie, you've got the wrong idea, Crowley is a very nice... *very long pause* friend... of mine? *shy smile*

Maggie: F-friend of yours? Oh, oh my, I am so sorry, I've... got the wrong idea, um... It's just that... I see him with you so often, and you are- and I just figured- Nevermind.

Aziraphale: *his smile starts to display some hints of regret without him realizing*

Maggie: Listen, Mister Fell, it is most probably not my place, but... In case you wanted to... You know, live something less... "friendly", I might know someone who might be... interested?

Aziraphale: *sudden flashes of Maggie's grandmother hitting on him* O-Oh? You do?

Maggie: You... Remember Mister Brown?

Aziraphale: Oh, yes, I saw him yesterday, he asked me to organize the next Monthly Meeting!

Maggie: Didn't he ask... Anything else?

Aziraphale: Not anything of substance I can remember of. Are you... implying he would have wanted to... hum... ask something else to me? *is never comfortable about these things*

Maggie: I think he likes you very much. And... I am sorry to say, again, certainly not my place, but... he might be a... better fit than your... friend.

Aziraphale: *embarrassed laugh* Maggie, truly, you've got the wrong idea about Crowley! He's the nicest person I've ever met *in over 6000 years which is saying something* and the best...*always marks a pause there for some reason* friend I could ever wish for!

Maggie: I understand, really, it's just that you seem... lonely, sometimes?

Aziraphale: Do I?

Maggie: Trust me, I know the feeling!

Aziraphale: *sympathetic smile* Nothing from... Nina?

Maggie: I'd rather not talk about it, it's... painful. Anyway, um... If you wanted to... Talk some more with Mister Brown, I'm pretty sure he would be very pleased!

Aziraphale: Well, I-

Maggie: *runs without warning* Oh, I-I really have to go, have a good trip, Mister Fell!

Aziraphale: *awkward wave**gets in the car* Oh, hello, there. I'm sure we're gonna get along just perfectly! *taps the steering wheel amicably*

Bentley: *activates a random song the second Aziraphale is seated and ready to go*

Oh, how wrong can you be?

Oh, to fall in love was my very first mistake,

How was I to know,

I was far too much in love to see oh

Jealousy,

Look at me now...

The next morning, the Bookshop's bell rings

Mr Brown: Mister Fell? Hello?

Jim: Hello, I'm Jim, Mister Fell's assistant! How can I help you not buying a book?

Mr Brown: Actually, I was hoping I could see Mister Fell himself, if that is...

Crowley: *arrives in style* Mister Fell is not here, who's ask- *stops and looks at him from afar* Oh. You, again? *is unsure why this last word came out of his mouth but still did*

Mr Brown: *startled* Ah, it is... you... Mister...?

Crowley: *reaches his glasses and puts them on**smirks and walks towards him* Crowley. Hello.

Mr Brown: I-I forgot to ask yesterday, you are...?

Crowley: *raises an eyebrow* I... am...?

Mr Brown: *tries to express himself with just the eyes*

Crowley: *does not get it**at all**makes some waves with his chin to signify he needs more details*

Mr Brown: Maybe... that was a mistake...

Crowley: *clueless Demon* A... mistake? What? The monthly meeting?

Mr Brown: N-no! Nothing to do with the monthly meeting! I...

Crowley: You wanted to see Mister Fell about... Not the meeting? Why?

Mr Brown: I... This is... *sighs* Can we, please, stop beating around the bush?

Crowley: *thinks he somewhat starts to get it but remains unsure* Uhhh... Sure...

Mr Brown: Is Mister Fell in a... relationship at the moment?

Crowley: *hesitates for much longer than he expected* Not... that I know of? And, well, I certainly... would know?

Mr Brown: Wait... You're not his... On-and-off partner?

Crowley: *feels something unexpected growing besides astonishment**is it... anger?* I am most certainly not.

Mr Brown: Oh... OH! G-good! I mean, okay! Are you his... cousin or something?

Crowley: *laughs* Hell no! *is tempted to remove his glasses for some reason*

Mr Brown: Business partner?

Crowley: Sort... of... speak?

Mr Brown: Oh, okay, hum... Can you please not tell Mister Fell about our encounter? I feel like I need to ask him out myself, you see?

Crowley: *finally totally gets it* Sorry. Ask him out? As in... Ask him for a date? *chuckles* Oh, no! Angel doesn't date, ever! *has heard the joke of the next three centuries*

Mr Brown: *gets offended**and cold**well, at least he tries* I-I'm sorry to say but that is not on you to decide, is it?

Crowley: *stops laughing out of nowhere and feels the anger taking the lead**approaches him menacingly* Or maybe, just maybe... it is?

Mr Brown: B-but, you said-

Crowley: *even colder voice* I know what I said, I just don't believe you heard me, so let me clarify... *takes him by the collar*

Mr Brown: *gasps*

Crowley: Mister Fell... doesn't... date. *ends up with a creepy smile*

Mr Brown: *muster some courage**looks at Crowley's hands on his vest**looks back at Crowley's glasses* What if he wants to?

Crowley: *gritted teeth* I assure you: he doesn't.

Mr Brown: How would you know that?!

Crowley: I just do.

Jim: *is back or maybe has never left, nobody knows* Uhhhh... Do you need... assistance in anything?

Crowley: *releases Mr Brown with the heaviest, most threatening smirk**turns at Jim* Can you show Mister Brown the exit? We're done here.

Mr Brown: But I...

Crowley: *turns back at him**accidently nose-on-nose* Ou-T.

Mr Brown: *recoils**frowns his brows**but remains intimidated* I guess you have some unfinished business to attend to, Mister Crowley.

Crowley: *looks at his nails* Yeahhh, I most certainly do. Taking care of Mister Fell's things takes such a long time indeed!

Mr Brown: *to Jim* I know the exit, thank you. Good... *to both* Have a... good day.

Crowley: *indifferent* Oh, I will. Taking care of...

Mr Brown: Mister Fell's things. Yes, I caught that.

Jim: Have a good day! *waves enthusiastically*

[The door closes]

Mr Brown: God, these two really need to talk!

***

Navigation time!

[While needing you to consider that, most of the time, the scenes are randomized and do no necessarily follow one another at all]

Previous - Beginning - Next

[averywiseanimatedcat]

Rewatching Good Omens season 3 liveblog

Episode 4-The hitchhiker etc Post 3

Link to prev posts

Link to liveblog master post

He’s so me I also can only do something perfectly once then never again so matter how hard I try

*cute moment of simping cause my bf killed some nazis then took me for a car ride to the theatre where I got a magician job then he almost shot me in the face but he didn’t cause I can rely on him and he trusts me and I think I fell in love tonight he looked so good with that spotlight on him teehee*

Aziraphale is really good under pressure, and not regular pressure, like life threatening pressure. He’s terrible in normal situations but as soon as Crowleys wellbeing was on the line he pulled that shit OUT.

I appreciate how this minisode ends with Aziraphale admitting there’s something to be said about shades of grey. But man…this Angel makes slow progress? How long has it been since bOudeY snatching? A long time and he’s still deciding if Crowley is evil or not or if good and evil aren’t binary…

Honestly sort it out Aziraphale you’re fumbling the bag big time here you can’t simultaneously want a demon to climb you like a tree whilst also believing he’s inherently evil. Honestly tho….I do think this night is where Aziraphale at least starts to fall in love. You can how unsure and kinda offbeat he is at the start like he has feelings but doesn’t know what they are. So he puts them down as ‘friend’ and ‘trust’. But he also realises that Crowley trusts him to, which is the turning point that pushes him to stray outside of his usually black and white thinking. It’s not just that he’s an angel and he’s good and can believe Crowley is also good, but Crowley is also straying outside what Aziraphale would consider demonic behaviour by trusting an angel.

DAMMIT they’re cute.

AnyWAY…

*Shax calls Aziraphale “Crowleys pet”*

Yes but the other way around.

The car following him…it’s so cute. Crowley has spent this whole season jogging along after Aziraphale and THE CAR IS DOING IT TO NOW.

*Aziraphale excited to see his hubby and hear Crowley was worried cause he was late*

*immediately gets plants shoved in his face*

“Oh there you are I was worried something might’ve happened to you.”

CAN WE stop and appreciate this line from Crowley?

——-

Crowley was definitely waiting and watching at the window because he saw Aziraphale pull up and came straight out with the plants all ready to go. And he’s again giving me ADHD energy because when you get ‘big’ emotions they often come out in some kind of weird hyperactive physical way (like running outside and shoving plants in your hubbys face when there was 0 rush to get them in the car whatsoever). I think he was worried, and he felt so happy and relieved when Aziraphale came back but he’s repressing so they emotions come out in this other way.

That’s a big lesson for life really-your emotions cannot be contained. They will come out someway, and you can either decide how they’re going to come out and have some control over it or they’ll come out in their own way in their own time.

——-

I’ve heard a few people say that if Crowley hadn’t told Aziraphale he was living in his car why didn’t he ask about the plants?

In my head Crowley either just told him he needed to bring them over to look after them while he stayed at the bookshop (we don’t actually know how long Azi was away I don’t think?) or Azi has asked at some point (or at multiple points) over the last few years but Crowley lied and got all defensive so Aziraphale stopped asking. These two both tend to just drop things if they come to a disagreement so it’s well within reason that Aziraphale did ask-but was shut down so just dropped it.

Moving on…

If anyone asks, this is my religion now.

Every time I get to see my child genuinely smile it makes my heart happy. We got to see him smile so freely this season it’s beautiful.

Bonus for the production shot of Furfurs book because there’s a few things I wanna point out:

-this book basically calls Aziraphale a squishy basic beige bitch and that’s amazing

-then it goes on to call him a demon smiter? Has he like…killed a demon before?

-absolutely not surprised he’s been a bishop in the past and I want that flashback as a minisode next season because you KNOW Aziraphale woulda been struggling hard with his friendship with Crowley while he was a ‘man of god’

-it’s so funny to me that Aziraphale was ‘assigned’ to Crowley like you gotta report your interactions to him. I need a little context here, is that why they started seeing each other so much? Because they were assigned to keep an eye on the other one by their respective sides?

-Furfur really going after Crowley for his name and bitch is called Furfur??

-‘His hair is BAD!’ Made me laugh so hard, Furfur giving me bitter ex vibes

[jadevalentine-writes]

WIP Wednesday - Living in Sin: Chapter 2 Preview - Good Omens Fanfic

Crowley spent the rest of the evening watching Aziraphale arrange his plants around the bookshop. His contributions included the occasional comment from the sofa where he was sprawled while nursing a bottle of scotch.

“No, no, angel, that one is sensitive to light. It should go in the south window until winter at least.”

“Oh! Alright then.” Aziraphale gave him a warm smile as he scooped up the small plant and bustled across the shop to the other window.

All the moving about, as well as a few glasses of wine, had forced Aziraphale to remove his jacket and roll up his sleeves. It was the most improperly dressed Crowley had seen him in recent memory and he spent a considerable amount of effort trying not to not think about the angel’s forearms. Or how strong yet soft they looked. Or how easily they carried around boxes of plants and piles of books and-

Crowley flapped the lapel of his jacket. It was quite hot in the bookshop and, oh dear, how did he reach the end of the bottle already?

Crowley squinted with amazement into the bottom of the empty bottle as Aziraphale finally returned to his chair and took a seat. He sighed and crossed his ankles as he picked up his glass of wine.

“I daresay, the plants will make this shop look like a veritable greenhouse tomorrow morning.” The angel smiled. “They should be much happier!”

Crowley wrinkled his nose as he set the empty bottle on the floor at his feet. “Eh, just don't over water them. I’ll handle that when I come back tomorrow.”

“Come back?” Aziraphale’s frown bordered on a pout and Crowley had to avert his eyes less he fell prey to its powers. “I thought you were going to take me up on my offer to…” Aziraphale flexed his right hand and then took a large gulp of wine. With liquid courage he continued. “You can stay, you know. As I said before, it should be perfectly safe, with Heaven and Hell giving us a break, as well as the wards-”

“Ach, I know. I know, alright?” Crowley sighed, slumping further into the couch. Aziraphale had spent the majority of their evening after dinner pitching and re-pitching the idea. Logically it was sound, Crowley knew, and he really had no strong argument against it save one: his pride.

Now, Crowley could save Aziraphale from destruction on any day ending in “y” and often did favors without being asked, but that was…different. That was Crowley saying thank you for not being smited (smote? smitten?) on sight in the Garden, and for agreeing to the Arrangement, and for, well, being his only friend on earth for over six-thousand years. But under no circumstances was that reversible. And that was the way of things, wasn’t it?

Demons did not need saving. They chose their path, and no one, not even a fussy angel, could save them from it.

Crowley released a breath he did not know he was holding, all while under Aziraphale’s blue-eyed gaze. Perhaps he had enough to drink for one night.

“I’ll think about it, okay?”

It was an olive branch, and likely a false one at that. Crowley could think about things for a millenia if he wanted. But the smile that lit up Aziraphale’s face, like the sun cresting a hill at dawn, well, it was enough to make the soft-hearted demon change his mind.

Almost.

“I should go,” Crowley grumbled, peeling himself vertical, hips first with spine and shoulders following.

Aziraphale frowned but hid it quickly behind the rim of his wine glass. “So soon?”

Crowley stretched his arms over his head, joints cracking and t-shirt riding up. If Aziraphale’s gaze tracked the newly exposed flesh like a heat-seeking laser, the demon was none the wiser.

“Well, I could be persuaded to stay,” Crowley drolled, “if you happen to have another bottle of that excellent scotch.”

Aziraphale raised a finger. “I shall check the cellar!” And then he was off, curls bobbing as he crossed to the back of the shop.

Crowley sighed, though it was not the sound of defeat. Rather it was the sound of fondness over a lifetime’s worth of habits well known. That was until he checked his wristwatch and grimaced.

Nearly three in the morning. The witching hour, the humans had called it, and at one point in time, it was. Now it was just the hour in which an angel, red-cheeked from light exertion and too many bottles of wine, would present a demon with a vintage bottle of scotch. And soon enough, dawn would come.

[emrys-with-a-little-star]

My theory about the ending of Good Omens S2 cause i don't agree with the coffee or the lie theory. I'm not gonna explain why i think they are wrong cause that would take too much time right now but maybe i will later. (I ended up explaining a little but about them in the end)

So i think Aziraphale does actually believe he can change something, Crowley knows nothing can be done and, as he says, both sides are toxic.

Aziraphale thinks Crowley would be happier as an angel because of how happy he was when creating the Nebula. And we never see Crowley smile like that, maybe Aziraphale does over the years but we are never shown that so for the time being i will assume Aziraphale never sees him that happy after he is cast down to hell.

Crowley wants to run away with Aziraphale, never to come back but Aziraphale has so much guilt from doing things differently from heaven's plans and falling for a demon is definitely hard for someone who his whole life has been taught that angels and heaven is good and demons and hell are bad. It's definitely easier for a demon to do some good sometimes than an angel to do anything evil cause why would you ever wanna do the bad thing. But that's exactly what Aziraphale doesn't fully understand yet: the line between those is very blurry and sometimes doing the thing that seems wrong at first is actually the correct thing to do. I'm gonna quote Crowley on this cause he said it perfectly: "When heaven ends life here on earth, it'll be just as dead as if hell ended it." Digging up graves and selling the bodies to be able to continue living, is that so wrong? And when they find out the bodies are to teach future doctors, it's now suddenly good? The line is incredibly blurry between good and evil.

Aziraphale gets told multiple times in the first season how the war is exactly what heaven wants and he doesn't think anything of it, no sudden realization that heaven might not be as good as he has been told his whole life, all he does is just try to explain his idea and keep the war from happening but not once does he blame heaven even though it is straight up made clear to him that heaven wanted the war.

The base of my theory is that the ending of season 1 doesn't get brought up again. We just not gonna talk about the fact that Crowley and Aziraphale, in heaven's and hell's point of view, are basically unkillable? It must be important, and if we now assume that both sides consider those two to be really powerful wouldn't they want them on their side? Metatron knew Crowley wouldn't take the deal, Metatron does not like Crowley, we saw how angrily he looked at him when he and Aziraphale were walking out of the bookshop. But he knew Aziraphale would be over the moon and probably take that deal cause he knows how naive and manipulated Aziraphale is. It came down to two options:

1) Crowley takes the deal and now the unkillable demon is an angel and they have two very powerful individuals on their team. And even if the point isn't the unkillable part, Crowley used to be a high level angel, still very powerful.

2) Crowley leaves, angry at Aziraphale and obviously doesn't go back to hell but Aziraphale does come back to heaven so hell doesn't have their unkillable demon but they have the unkillable angel on their side. They think Aziraphale is incredibly powerful and having him on their team is a huge advantage for the war aka the second coming aka probably the second coming of Armageddon.

Why would they get an angel who is strongly against war to basically lead the war? He would absolutely be against it.

Also emotionally unstable and vulnerable Aziraphale is much easier to control and manipulate which means him leaving Crowley makes it even easier for heaven to get him to be on their side.

Also why would they appoint a traitor who hasn't done anything to convince them that he isn't one to be the new supreme archangel. Why do they suddenly trust him now?

And if Aziraphale and Crowley stayed together, the presumably unkillable angel and demon, on earth or just not on either sides, wouldn't that make them a danger to both hell and heaven cause, as far as both sides know, both of them are very powerful.

Shortly: Heaven wants to use Aziraphale in the war against hell cause they knew Crowley wouldn't go back to hell and that given heaven an advantage, having the, as far as they know, unkillable angel in their team. If Crowley had agreed to become an angel, then they would have also had Crowley which would have given them even bigger of an advantage.

Or they have some other plan with Aziraphale and they just needed him to cut contact with Crowley and come back to heaven and they used this as kind of bait.

Also coffee theory would mean that the kiss was meaningless to Aziraphale and everything he did was because he was under the influence of the miracle. And also everythinf Aziraphale did is exactly in his character and exactly what he would do, there's no way that he would have just left heaven forever and ran away with Crowley, there's been no indication that he doesn't still trust heaven and believe in the "good side".

On the lie theory, Aziraphale is not that good at lying, he doesn't like to lie and he seemed to want to go to heaven too bad for it to be because of a threat. And the way he asks "But... my bookshop?" he isn't asking cause he is worried about the bookshop, he has doupts about leaving, he doesn't want to.

Also very important, Aziraphale doesn't end the kiss, Crowley does. I've seen some people mention that Aziraphale didn't want the kiss but he didn't pull away. Maybe i'll analyze the kiss in a future post, i have too many thoughts on that too.

[yowlthinks]

Good Omens s2 thoughts and impressions

Below is sort of a dumping ground of my thoughts and impressions of S2 after the first watch. Hiding under more in case tags didn't work

SPOILERS FOR GOS2 BELOW!

OK, so I'll try to go by theme...

I really liked Gabriel's story arch and the probing into how past actions and experiences form who we are and what we do next. Removing his memories and making him this big, naive child, slightly irritating but also sort of noble at heart was a nice exploration of this theme. Him very readily offering himself to the demons shows that there was some good in him, it just got lost through years of bureaucracy. And his chat with Crowley was absolutely genius because then we can see Crowley really forgive him, make peace with this new version of Gabriel, give him a second chance, and I think that is very valuable. Also, on Gabriel, we see Aziraphale do that too: tell him that he previously was not a good person, and when Gabriel asks about now, Aziraphale honestly replies that he doesn't know. That is a very honest way to treat it.

Job and other historic excursions: I also really liked these, even though some parts felt very chaotic.

Crowley's love of kids (goat and human) is so heartwarming, and his performance of the "birth" was on par with that cut bookshop opening scene (in terms of comedic effect and how earnest he takes to saving what is believes to be good).

The overall Job storyline also leading to the scene on the rock, with Aziraphale having a good cry and being ready to go into hell over lying, and Crowley comforting him... that was really touching.

The pre-fall interaction and Crowley being the first one to shield Aziraphale with his wing... well, I am already in love with Crowley, now I love him even more.

"Our side" - there are lots of things I am sure I missed and will notice on re-watch and also want to think through, but so far I of course loved them both highlighting "our side", that whole "our car, our bookshop " interaction was lovely.

I am a but upset Aziraphale does nothing to acknowledge that Crowley lives in his car, doesn't offer him to officially move into the bookshop. That felt like he would only be generous and kind to Crowley when pressed, while Crowley is there for Aziraphale unconditionally. You can also see that when Crowley says "you only call me when you're bored, when you've done something you're proud of or when you're in trouble". And we again only see Crowley rescuing Aziraphale, not the other way round. And wtf was that after the graveyard scene, when he perfectly understands that Crowley was punished by hell, but offers no reflection, acknowledgement or commiseration. I hope in S3 we are going to see him come to the realisation that he needs to step up and win Crowley back!

Overall, this season was very much about Aziraphale having fun, while Crowley is going through an existential crisis.

Also this whole message of high stakes with erasure from the book of life and them protecting each other got kinda lost. Perhaps it serves to illustrate that they do indeed not talk about how each one would die for the other, so again, high hopes for S3!

Also, what was cool is that moment when Crowley wants to watch Aziraphale get people to come to the ball: he is basically delighted because he gets to watch Aziraphale TEMPT people. He is really having fun with that, until, of course, Nina starts asking questions and triggers yet another crisis.

So speaking about their relationship, I think while this season they are both all about "our side", Nina's questions for the first time ever make Crowley realise that they are de facto a couple. And perhaps gets him thinking of how they can take this forward. And then Nina and Maggie's little chat with him afterwards seals that thought that he wants their togetherness be recognised, in the open, official, as it were.

I wish, I really wish Nina and Maggie caught them both, and had that talk with both of them. Things would have probably gone very differently...

I also think Metatron is playing his own game and he certainly is manipulative. Who is thwarting all Heaven's plans? It's these two, so dividing and conquering is the way to go. If Aziraphale is directly involved in bringing the big plan about, he won't have the chance to sabotage, and they can press his knowledge of the Earth. Also, notice how Aziraphale does not give an answer to Metatron straightaway. He says no first, gives excuses and then noncommittally goes to discuss it with Crowley. Only Crowley gets all emotional, asks if Aziraphale has told them to bugger off and Aziraphale who under Metatron's influence imagined them two working together to reform Heaven gets defensive... It still does not excuse his behaviour, and I am still angry at how ge treated Crowley, but I hope (seriously hope!!!) There will be a huge reconing for him in S3. A little apology dance would not do it, it'll have to be a full-on apology musical, tears and genuinely saying how stupid he was and how sorry he is and that he wants nothing more but just be with Crowley.

Also, it is curious that we see Aziraphale say no to authority a little more.. not that it helped at the end, but some growth, I guess. I will probably think more about that, with notes. And note the years that Aziraphale did the apology dance (we need to see it next season we must!

[lostcybertronian]

The First Night

I’ve been watching Good Omens again. Have the first night after Armageddiddn’t-happen.

---

There were no clocks in Crowley’s apartment, so Aziraphale had no earthly idea what time they arrived back after the Armageddon-that-couldn’t.In fact, there were hardly any things at all; a single desk sat facing a floor-to-ceiling window, and an adorned chair accompanied it. Beyond the odd painting, everything was gray, gray, gray.

Aziraphale’s first thought as Crowley shut the door behind them was to suggest some bookshelves, and maybe some books. Maybe a few decorative sofas, even. 

But as he opened his mouth to speak he remembered what Hell had been like: bodies pushed together, pipes hanging down from the ceiling, dirt smeared on the floor and walls. Crowded. Filthy. The exact opposite of this place. Kind of like Heaven, really.

“I like it,” he said instead, clasping his hands in front of him and plastering a smile to his face. “It’s very you.”

“Well,” Crowley muttered, shoving his hands in the pockets of his black skinny jeans and sauntering over to the desk, knocking his bony hip against it. The movement was fluid. Smooth as a snake’s scales. But only someone who knew him could see his entire body vibrated tension. “It’s no bookshop.”

Book. Shop. Spat like he was chopping it to bits between his teeth. Aziraphale wouldn’t have been surprised if he’d hissed it with a forked tongue. He shifted his weight and took a tentative step forward, just to see how Crowley would react. And he did, coiling like the world’s tightest spring.

“It’s perfectly adequate.” He paused and looked around, fighting the urge to cringe. Heaven’s pristine walls pressed in around him. “It’s actually quite nice.”

Crowley made a face, but didn’t question the obvious lie. “I only have one bed,” he said, seeming to trail off mid-thought as the implications of the statement occurred to him. “But I can sleep just about anywhere, really . . . Listen-” he made some gestures with his hands, his ring glinting under the overhead lights- “Angel-”

Aziraphale fidgeted with his lapels. He knew where this was going. “Crowley-”

“I think we need to talk.” They said at the same time, resulting in a stare-off that to Aziraphale was both frightfully awkward and charged. He took this time to step forward, closing the distance between him and the demon with tempo he usually didn’t possess. 

Normally, it would be Crowley who initiated; who coaxed and wheedled and pried the angel out of his self-imposed shell with affection and promises of sweets. It would be Crowley who took the lead, not the other way around. But Crowley was right: there were no sides anymore. And Aziraphale needed to show him that he was ready to meet him where he was, and that no holy water or hellfire was going to hold him back.

So, he kissed him. And no sooner did his lips touch Crowley’s did the demon seize his lapels and crush their mouths together with a strangled whine.

“My,” was all Aziraphale could say when they broke apart seconds later, a mere blip in their endless lives, but eternity to him all the same. He brushed the back of his hand over his mouth, smearing away blood from where Crowley’s sharp teeth had caught on his bottom lip.

“I’ve been waiting forever to do that, Angel.” Crowley hovered close, keeping their faces hardly centimeters apart, almost like he wanted to do it again but wasn’t quite sure.

Aziraphale did it for him, dipping in for another quick kiss. “I know,” he said softly. “I confess I wasn’t ready.”

Crowley nodded. His adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. Outside the window, the nighttime lights of London glittered. “I know.”

He eased his grip on Aziraphale’s lapels, settling for stringing his long, spindly arms over the angel’s shoulders. Aziraphale let him. Even leaned into the touch. Heaven was too cold for such things. If they were to find out…

Crowley must have seen the look on his face, and understood what it meant. He withdrew, as always patient, as always willing to go at Aziraphale’s pace. 

“I only have one bed,” he offered, “you can take it if you’d like-”

Aziraphale held up his hands. “You know I don’t sleep very often, my dear-” he hesitated as a flicker of disappointment crossed Crowley’s face, so quick he nearly missed it- “but I’d enjoy it, I believe, with you.”

Crowley smiled. Tight, but true. He held out one hand, and Aziraphale took it. “It’s a pleasure, Angel.”

[ofpineapplesanddawns]

a drabble of any ineffable husbands fluff if you're up to it (if you need more to go on it can be in Aziraphale's bookshop)

I've been drawing stuff with them in their cottage in the South Downs, so I'm gonna go with that.

On with the fic!

--

Crowley liked the little slice of the world they now lived in, and that included the little town nearby, where he'd go about causing minor problems for old time's sake, and getting the shopping down. He had left Aziraphale alone for a few hours, which was perfectly fine, the two of them loved being around one another but also liked their space.

The demon came to a stop in front of their cottage, parking the Bentley. He stepped out with the shopping bags, looking over his car real quick. She was in need of a wash, the country roads kicked up a lot of dust.

Yes, Crowley could just miracle it away, like he did in the city, but he enjoyed cleaning, especially when it wasn't him stress cleaning. He made a note to come out later in the day to get the Bentley cleaned up, but after he spent some time with his husband.

He stopped in front of the door, about to put his key in the lock, when he tasted something in the air. It was sweet, strong, and warm.

Ah, Aziraphale was baking.

Crowley really hoped that he was using the actual packets of yeast he had in the kitchen and not... whatever grew on some of his books. Again.

Open the door, Crowley could smell and taste the aromas of baked goods, and felt how warm the cottage was. "Angel?" He called out as he walked towards the kitchen, finding the place a bit of a mess with bowls and dishes, utensils and baking items scattered all over their counters and island. "Got a wild hair up your arse and decided to break out the flour, angel?" He commented as he set the bags on the island.

"Oh!" Aziraphale looked away from where he had been bent over, staring into the little window of the oven. "Ah, yes, sorry! I had nearly forgotten I promised the ladies at the local book club that I'd bake for the farmer's market tomorrow. They're doing a charity thing and wanted me to contribute with some of my tasty cakes and such!"

Crowley glanced about after pushing his glasses up to rest on his head. "Yeah, I can see that. I think you made enough for everyone in all the towns and villages around here."

"Oh, hush." Aziraphale huffed and opened the oven, pulling out a pan that contained what looked to be muffins. Crowley could taste bananas in the air, ah, banana nut. He might snatch one of those up.

"Made anything for us to enjoy for tea?" Crowley asked as he put things away with a wave of his hand, too lazy to bother with the task himself.

The angel perked up. "Yes! I made a delightful loaf of honeyed bread for us to try with those delightful jams you experimented with the other day! I'm really looking forward to the pear one."

Crowley made a face. "You can have that whole mess, I'll stick to the strawberry and raspberry ones. But still, sounds good, want me to get things ready while you deal with your mess?"

Aziraphale nodded and the two got about to work, the sound of music from another room, sounded like one of Aziraphale's records, was playing. Crowley glanced over at his husband, who was moving about, grabbing used dishes to put in the sink to be washed after lunch, with a smile on his face.

Sometimes it caught him off-guard to find himself in this situation, where he didn't fear Heaven and Hell finding them together, where they were living together in retirement. And married, to boot.

"What's got you smiling like that, dear?" Aziraphale asked, catching Crowley's attention.

"Ah? Well, just... thinkin', 's all." He turned back to starting the electric kettle.

The angel moved closer, pressing close. "Thinking about what?"

"Don't make me say it, angel..." He groaned. "I've got a reputation."

"I'm sure you do." Aziraphale said, the bastard.

Crowley huffed. "I was just thinkin' about how lucky I am that I can do stuff like this with you, it's... it's nice."

This put a huge smile on the other man's face. "It is, isn't it? Now, get the kettle started, dear boy, so we can have some nibbles!" He then kissed Crowley on the cheek and went back to the sink.

[ngkiscool]

Prompt: #30 “Don’t ruin this.”

Fandom: Good Omens

Word Count: 1000 words.

Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley are trying a new restaurant, and discover that the staff have opinions about their customers' eating habits. Crowley will not tolerate any disrespect towards his angel (no harm was done to either rat or waiter).

CW : Implied fatphobic comment

Also on my Ao3 - HERE

Aziraphale returned to the bookshop, carrying their takeaway dinner from the new restaurant at the end of the street. It was the first time they ordered from that place, and when he left to get their food, just a few minutes ago, he was all but literally glowing with excitement. Now he had full hands, but the smile was gone from his face.

"What happened? Have you met Gabriel on the way? They were supposed to leave us alone!" Crowley leaped from his seat, scanning the area for potential enemies. "I don't sense anything, except you of course. And the curry, it really messes up my sense of smell."

"Don't worry, my dear, it's nothing like that. I haven't met any angels, and we are not in danger. While you are standing, can you be a dear and bring a bottle of wine from the kitchen?" The angel tried to smile, but Crowley knew better than that. If 6,000 years of being acquainted with Aziraphale had taught him anything, it was to see when the other wasn't telling the truth. Or at least, not all of it.

After returning from the kitchen, he continued the conversation. "Then what is it? You look upset. Have they forgotten to add soy sauce again? It is very important for eating sushi. I will go back there and ask for it." Crowley was already halfway across the room when he heard Aziraphale's voice. "No, everything we ordered is here, we even got a free dessert, courtesy of the house. Let's just sit down and eat, your curry is getting cold."

"Free dessert? That's nice of them, though not surprising. How can anybody not want to be generous with you?"

The angel smiled again, a bit happier this time, but it still didn’t reach his eyes. "To be frank, it was the other way around. The guy at the counter gave it away because he thought I was trying a new diet, and too shy to ask for it."

Crowley looked at him, enraged. "He what? And you gave him a good smite, I hope."

Aziraphale moved uncomfortably in his chair, avoiding Crowley’s gaze. "You know perfectly well I did not do such a thing. Now can we please forget about it, and start eating? The sushi does look rather scrumptious."

Crowley obeyed, of course, and changed the topic. "You would never believe what happened today, I ran into Madam Tracy! Apparently, she and the Sergeants Are now living together, and considering moving out of London." He continued rambling about his day, and gradually Aziraphale relaxed, and even managed to enjoy the food, the company, and the complimentary bottle of wine, and seemed to forget about the whole thing.

Several hours later, one drunken demon left the bookshop, followed with a good night blessing as they parted ways. Not too long after that, though, he had company again - this time not an angel, but an army of rats.

"Lisssten, guys. You have a very important mission. You need to infiltrate the restaurant who dared to insult the angel and cause as much havoc as you can. This is an important gig, guys, don’t ruin this".

The rats squawked to show their understating and hurried to the place their master had shown them. Technically they were creatures of hell, but the truth was, that deep down they preferred the angel. He was not from their lot, but he did give them yummy tidbits whenever they crossed pass, and that tipped the scale. And if in return they protected his precious books, that doesn't really count as helping the enemy, right? Just a side arrangement that nobody has to know about.

The sight that welcomed the workers of the restaurant the next morning was not pleasant, to say the least. Chewed cart boxes all over the place, pipes leaking something that most certainly was not water, and even the fridge had somehow been opened by the mysterious pests, causing all the food that was inside to become rotten during the night. It was, indeed, a major blow to any restaurant, especially one that had just opened and had to build a reputation from scratch.

Even worse, just a few minutes after the workers arrived and saw the damage, the municipal health department came for a routine inspection. The inspector had all the needed credentials and a very professional black and yellow jacket, and when he gave the order to shut down the restaurant immediately, the manager knew better than to argue with him. Besides, something about his sunglasses, worn even inside the establishment, gave the impression of a person that is not used to being disobeyed, and the manager was certainly not in the mood to find out what happens to those who do argue with him.

That night it was Crowley's turn to bring the food, and Aziraphale waited for him, plates already organized in the back room, accompanied with a bottle of wine. He looked surprised, seeing the bags that were placed on the table: "Another new place? What happened to the one we ate from yesterday? I thought you liked their curry."

The demon smiled, showing just a bit too much of his fangs: "They had some health regulations problems, or at least that's what I've heard. One thing is sure, they won't make any more fatphobic comments any time soon."

Aziraphale looked at him, grateful. "I better not say thank you, probably", he stopped and looked again at the writing on the food box, as if afraid the name of the restaurant would change, "but you are my hero.”

The other blushed, stuttered, choked on a wine that hadn’t yet been drunk, coughed a bit more, and finally managed to say: "it was nothing, let’s forget it. Your dumplings are getting cold."

They started eating in a companionable silence, enjoying the meal, when Aziraphale suddenly remembered something: “But what about all the people who worked there? It was just one person who faulted me!”

“Don’t worry, angel, nobody is going to lose their job, the place will be opened up again within a week, this time after a full briefing of all the employees about the right way to speak with customers.”

That earned him another adoring look: “You know, Crowley, I’ve always said that, deep down, you are quite a nice demon.”