#my contrarian soul. unfortunate

[windupaidoneus]

its so hard living in a world where everyone ships a pair & treats it as canon but ur just like Yea its there about it

[telomeke-bbs]

Okay, not (quite) anonymous any more, but still not (that) active yet. With all the recent discussion of episode 5 and the rooftop scene, I think I've yet to see analysis of 5 [4/4] 9:06-9:13, from when Pran says "We're not even friends" to when Pat says "That's right." Of course, we didn't know it on first viewing, but based on what we learn later from episode 12 [4/4] 12:58-13:54, what Pran says must have hurt. And we see it in Pat/Ohm's reaction. I'd love to see that deconstructed.

Hi @pandasmagorica! 😍 Sorry this reply is so late; I was struggling with my post about OS2 x BBS x ATOTS and also some work deadlines.

With regard to the Ep.5 rooftop, I must agree with you that Pran's comment "We're not even friends" must really have stung for Pat.

By this point he'd been totally swept away in the rush of his new-found feelings that he also knew were returned. But Pran, contrarian as ever, was vehemently denying the existence of closeness to his face. And to deny that they were even friends when they had actually been so close and affectionate behind the scenes before must have felt like a gut punch to Pat, who was laying himself so bare and vulnerable here.

For almost all of Ep.5 we watched as Pat sank deeper and deeper into the disorientating realization that he had somehow fallen in love with his supposed rival. And he must have been pushed so close to the brink of despair by the swell of these anguished, bottled emotions that he couldn't wait even a second longer than necessary to confess it all to Pran (which of course is quite in character for our open-hearted boy).

(above) Bad Buddy Ep.5 [4/4] 1.18

This was why he waited up for Pran down at the base of their block, drunk as he was, so as not to miss his return. And when he was prevented – by Wai's presence – from expressing all that was churning within him, of course he couldn't contain that pressure and it all erupted into a brawl.

But Pat on the rooftop is now showered and clearheaded, and once again focused on his task of confessing all to Pran.

(above) Bad Buddy Ep.5 [4/4] 7.45

Unfortunately, as before, Pran is unaware of Pat's true feelings and is expecting their usual jostling, competitive dynamic to be the framework of their exchange. And so Pran continues to toss barbs at Pat, thinking he'll find some way to lob them back as he'd always done before.

And in a sense he does, but Pat's energy is different now. For him it's not a game anymore and the usual teasing impishness that we saw so much of in preceding episodes (and at the start of Ep.5 too) is gone.

This scene is also a callback to (and a parallel with) Ep.3 [4/4] 6.09 – in the corridor there, Pran had been so moved by Pat's generosity and help with the bus‑stop that he decided to dial back on the rivalry and was wanting to take things to the next level.

(above) Bad Buddy Ep.3 [4/4] 6.51

This was the motivation behind his seemingly off-the-cuff "Have you eaten?" at Ep.3 [4/4] 7.20 – he was wanting to interact with Pat socially instead of as a competitor (see this write-up linked here for more analysis). Before this, the only other time we'd seen them at a meal together was at the wonton noodle stall (Ep.3 [1I4] 6.20), and it only happened by accident (and Pat soon turned it into a chopstick battle anyway) so I like to think Pran was wanting a romantic do-over in Ep.3 [4/4] by asking Pat out for a meal.

But there in the corridor Pat only seemed to want more of their usual relationship dynamic (more gameplay), and he signaled this with another of his bait-and-switch moves, lulling Pran with the return of his guitar and then saying "I just like to see your face… when you lose."

Here on the rooftop the tables have turned. In the corridor of Ep.3 [4/4] Pran was left resigned with Pat's unchanging focus on their rivalry (and yet maybe still relieved that they could continue their relationship, even if it was based on competition). But on the rooftop it's now Pat – all ready to bare his soul – who is thwarted and exasperated by Pran instead.

During the fight scene we already saw Pat getting annoyed at Pran (who was operating in their default mode of pretending to be bitter enemies). And he retaliated with a refusal to play along, turning snarky when Pran said "Why? Is it so hard to accept defeat?" at Ep.5 [4/4] 2.41. Pat's snide response "Defeated by that lousy song. Why would I feel anything?" landed like a slap too (though Pran couldn't have felt it, unlike Pat and us viewers who knew the truth behind his sarcasm). Because of course Pat had his heart torn to shreds when he finally understood that the song Just Friend? was really about Pran's unrequited love for him, and was now speaking to his feelings for Pran in return.

So on the rooftop Pat – perhaps annoyed at having to delay the confessing of his own truths – calls out the double-sidedness of Pran's comment and laces his response with more sarcasm and layers of unspoken meaning. His skewed, sardonic smile when he says "That's right" is a mix of sadness and derision, a colloid of contrasts ironically just like the relationship that they've always known – a forced mix of enmity and friendship, a combination of two opposites that will never truly meld.

If we're being generous, it's possible to read that Pran intended his "We're not even friends" to mean something like they're not allowed to be friends in the fullest sense of the word, in front of society and the world at large, even though they were always friends behind the scenes. But what Pat does is to take the literal meaning of this and flip it on its head.

They're both aware that their illicit friendship exists, but it's a friendship that dare not speak its name because of outside disapprobation. Pat's answer in the affirmative also snorts cynically, not just at Pran's surface denial, but also at their pitiless circumstances that don't allow them ever to be seen in front of others as anything besides bitter rivals.

And this is why he goes on to list why others might think they're not friends – in spite of the fact that (for all intents and purposes, except for how their relationship is presented to the world) – they actually are:

"How can we be friends when our parents despise one another?"

"How can we be friends if we live next door to each other yet can't even talk?"

"How can we be friends if we have to compete against one another in everything?"

But just like his sarcastic "That's right" and the cynicism of his mirthless smile, his words here are rhetorical, and are meant to highlight the opposite of what they seem to be saying – because his list is only made up of obstacles to friendship, but not reasons for enmity.

Their parents' mutual hostility, the ban on communicating with the boy next door, the enforced competition – these were constraints imposed on their friendship, but in themselves are no foundation or justification for any kind of animosity between them. And early on, little Pat and Pran found ways to get around the barriers and become firm friends in all but name, because there was never any justifiable reason for them not to be so.

Pat is calling Pran out here; he's telling Pran that he's just repeating what they'd been told since childhood, but the two of them, despite having drifted apart after Pran was sent away – they know better. And he's also calling for an end to the verbal gameplaying, and for them to face their truths.

Because after each rhetorical question is the silent, unspoken answer that BOTH know to be true:

"How can we be friends when our parents despise one another?" "But we ARE friends…"

"How can we be friends if we live next door to each other yet can't even talk?" "But we found a way around it…"

"How can we be friends if we have to compete against one another in everything?" "The competition was never a barrier to us ACTUALLY becoming friends…"

He's using rhetoric and sarcasm to illustrate that they weren't allowed to be friends and they've been conditioned not to call themselves that – but it doesn't change the truth about their friendship.

And I think Pran hears him loud and clear – despite what the world's been telling them all their lives, they are close and they have been friends, which is why there's a discernible softening on Pran's part.

I think Ohm did a fantastic job in Ep.5, heaving onto his shoulders the weighty stone that was also BBS's glowing heart, when it was Nanon doing all the heavy emotional lifting in the first four episodes. You can see what Pat is going through – but just in case you want further insight regarding his inner turmoil, BBS actually lets us in on a little more info.

Pat's audition as Riam in Ep.7 [4/4] 5.26 was also a play-by-play repetition of the Ep.5 rooftop scene, but Pat/Riam verbalizes his feelings a bit more directly, and adds further dimension to our understanding of Pat's motivations while on the rooftop.

(above) Bad Buddy Ep.7 [4/4] 5.26

Using Riam's voice, what he says in Ep.7 [4/4] cuts out all of his previous rhetoric, and instead speaks plainly of his weariness with the gameplay and of his willingness to give it up (repudiating his playful corridor self of Ep.3 [4/4]):

"I’m tired. Tired of pretending to hate you while your face has taken over my heart. Aren’t you tired too?... Let’s stop it. I don’t want to play this game anymore. I don’t want to lie to people anymore. You asked if I still wanted us to be friends. What if my answer is no? What do you say?"

Part of why Ep.5's rooftop scene hits so hard is not just because Pran walking away embodies the loss of a romantic story that could have been. It hits also because we see just how far battle-weary Pat has come, on a rollercoaster journey of grappling with emotions (over the course of just one episode) that Pran had taken years to integrate as part of his reality.

The loss is all the greater because we see how much it cost them to get to this point. For Pat it meant dismantling his worldview and lifelong sense of self as Pran's rival in every respect – and yet he was willing to cast it all aside, after recognizing the truth underlying his closeness to Pran.

As BBS is also an allegory for the lives of queer people, all the rumination around "friends who are not friends" here (also calling out to Pat's favorite among all of Pran's personally-scented tees) parallels how closeted LGBTQ+ relationships are often not allowed to speak their truth to wider society.

But while the allegorical message may speak to us intellectually, I think it gets drowned out by the molten magma at the searing core of this scene on the rooftop, which communicates directly – deafeningly – with the heart. All intellectual preoccupations aside, it's also just two young, would-be lovers stumbling through a conversation where so much is unknown and so much has yet to be said, trying to find the truth of their relationship in the maze of all the semantics – which is what many of us who have had to navigate young love must have experienced at some point.

Some of us get beyond the maze and fall into the truth behind the words straightaway. Others, like Pat and Pran, will have to take a little longer to get there. But as they ultimately demonstrate, it's always worth the journey when your erstwhile "friend" (or "enemy") turns out to be your soulmate instead. 💖

[cangrellesteponme]

NOVEMBER 2ND - FRIENDLY ADVICE

(read this on AO3 here)

dadbastian week day... five? yes yes five i can't count for shit

this is the end of the fluff. unlike my other pieces so far, it's canon compliant AND it's from ciel's pov so you know damn well there are some very depressing thoughts in there. but i swear it's funny at times

in which sebastian's inappropriate bouts of parental care are so uncanny ciel can't bear it.

enjoy!

Unusually enough, Ciel is pulled out of his self-imposed isolation not by darker business, but by bothersome social obligations.

Though it has become routine, a habit carved into him bone-deep by merciless, methodical hands, waking up early is unpleasant as ever. Today, especially, the usual shadows clinging to Ciel’s mood have morphed into both despondency and contrarianism, and it takes all of his self control not to throw his morning teacup against the wall only for the satisfaction of watching it shatter in his stead. The catharsis would be welcomed, but ultimately pointless. It would be neither rational nor worth the effort to lash out.

The day is only starting, and he will need all the energy he can get.

Ciel spends the better part of the two hours allocated to preparations for the day ahead staring out the window. The clouds, of exceptional darkness and volume for the season, make him feel some sense of contentment — Ciel’s soul will never truly know art, but he thinks of poets’ love for nature as a mirror of the self, something he has only known through boringly meticulous study, and almost catches a glimpse of that symbiosis in the skies.

However, Ciel is not his name, no matter how much he tries to convince himself that it fits him as well as an appointed title, and those clouds are to break soon and reform in an endless cycle of tides and rains, of buildup and release — while he himself is only bound to break, and never to reform after his premature destruction.

These are pointless musings, so he puts them aside for the time being.

“I believe you should wear the warmer ensemble, sir,” Sebastian says, his polite tone insufferably fake — intentionally so, Ciel knows, as the demon is fully capable of actually sounding nice.

Looking back at the clothes his butler apparently wants him to wear, Ciel strongly disagrees. Though they do fit his tastes as he favours high coverage, the thick, unpleasant-looking fabrics are clearly chosen to account for cold weather more than the comfort of the wearer — the bane of his existence, in summary, not that he would ever say so out loud.

“I don’t quite care, Sebastian.”

The butler looks annoyed, and makes no effort to hide it, like a scolding mother more than the servant he is supposed to pretend to be. Ciel wants to wipe that expression off his face, scratch it off until his nails are worn and bloody, but that won’t do. The only way to make him bend is an explicit order, and that would mean voicing his discomfort, and he knows Sebastian will push and question him, and of course see through any lie. He could simply not answer, but his silence would betray his turmoil. Ciel knows, deep down, that this is not a matter of distant disgust for the inappropriate liberties Sebastian takes with his role — it is a close kind of unease, as Sebastian’s fleeting bouts of unnatural fondness could almost be returned. The sight of him makes Ciel want to break.

(And on days like these, when the sound of his own ever so shallow breath makes him think of sorrow, the sight of him makes Ciel want to break, yes, and cry, and have someone comfort him lovingly enough to make the entire world go away. He never gives in to the urge, but sometimes his heart is still that of a sheltered child, and he wishes and prays he could be spared.)

“It would be… unfortunate for you to fall ill,” Sebastian eventually says, not letting him lose himself to his thoughts.

Ciel decides then and there that he would rather die of some illness than listen.

Later in the day, the clouds collapse into pouring rain.

Three days later, the consequences of Ciel’s actions come knocking, and the metaphorical impacts echo all around his ribcage and against his already fragile lungs.

That is a bit of an exaggeration. Bad colds do tend to make people more prone to theatrics.

(They don’t. But Ciel will sooner die than admit he’ll take any excuse to let himself be less uptight, at least in the confines of his head, where none can judge and no hands can reach.)

Sebastian, always the thorn in — and the shadow by — his side, sighs from his spot right by the bed.

“Aren’t I always right?”

“Not always,” Ciel replies, and immediately coughs for his words. “Not even most of the time.”

He coughs again, and keeps at it until he can almost visualise every inch of his constricted throat. Sebastian has the audacity to look concerned, and the sight is aggravating.

In times like these, Ciel intimately knows the source of his discomfort. It is something so painful it might be a form of torture Ciel has not yet faced, watching the one whose hands he knows will break him — whose hands he has imagined tearing him apart again and again, night after night — pose as a source of safety. Of warmth. Every single one of the demon’s kindnesses is an anticipated act of profound betrayal, and Ciel is almost rendered mad with anger at the unfairness of it all.

“Young master, you’ll do well to stop arguing and rest instead. Perhaps one day you will grow wise enough to listen to me…”

The worst part is he does not know if his rage is entirely for Sebastian to receive.

“I would not call it wise to listen to the advice of the beast whose stomach growls in my presence,” he still says, looking him in the eye with every bit of resentment he can bring up, because it is easier to go through the motions of hating him. “You are, after all, the reason I won't live long enough to grow into anything, really.”

Sebastian unflinchingly stares back. He does not look concerned anymore. Ciel is glad, for once, that only verbalised lies are prohibited by the contract.

[lucas-deziderio]

Dezi reads Pact

I am a newcomer to Tumblr and have just found out about liveblogging books. It seems pretty darn fun! So I decided to try my hand at it to both exercise my literary analysis muscles and to maybe make a few friends in this site. And I've decided that my first subject on this will be John “Wildbow" McCrae's web serial Pact.

I've been a huge fan of his other work, Worm, for years now (though I do have a couple issues with it). And I'm also a big fan of urban fantasy stories with well designed magic systems, so the premise of this book is already very appealing to my tastes.

I have actually started reading through it before but put it on hold for a while. I am currently sitting in the middle of Signature 8.7 and will be picking up the story from there. I'll try to post once I finish each chapter, sharing my overall thoughts and analysis, and maybe once I finish each arc to stitch them all together and make predictions about the plot.

The road so far

Here are some assorted thoughts I've had on what I've read of the story so far:

Blake Thornburn is definitely a protagonist of all time. This little wet blanket of a man has successfully fled his toxic family, survived homelessness and got adopted into a found family of queer artists only to then be dragged back into his family's issues. And the skeletons in his grandma's closet want to eat his soul.

Also he totally fumbled a threesome. My dude simply can't get a win.

Rose Thornburn is a character who is completely devoid of any trans subtext, thank you very much. At the beginning I thought she was an excellent addition to the story, being a tool to get Blake to externalize his thought process and opinions. The first arcs would have been really dry without her. But she has grown so contrarian; convincing her to help is now an additional step Blake has to do every time he comes up with a new plan of action. I suspect she might become an antagonist even before the end. Is it just me? Is it some kind of ingrained misogyny?

Evan is the best character in the story. He's such a ray of sunshine that every line of his is like a breath of fresh air in this dark and gritty narrative Blake is trapped in. Please, let him become a fire bird. I beg you. He's just a cinnamon roll too pure for this world.

The magic system is maybe the best I've ever seen and is definitely what makes the story stand out. It feels like what I, almost instinctually, always imagined magic should work like. But defined and refined to a point where it actually becomes a usable set of rules. Everything from true names, binding, spirits, demesnes... It's ugh, so good! I will probably dig more into each of those elements as they come up in the next chapters because there's so much to chew on.

The monsters. The author has this amazing ability of grabbing well-known concepts of mythological creatures and giving them their own spin while at the same time seemingly distilling them to their core appeal. After meeting Wildbow's goblins, that's how I expect all other goblins to be like. The same goes for demons, fey, ghosts... As with the magic system, I'll dig into each of those as they come up in the next chapters.

During the discussion of the binding contract, the imp Pauz has mentioned some “inviolable rules", which caught Blake's attention for a second but were not clearly explained. This has been living rent-free in my head since then and I am very sure it will come back later.

Isadora, the sphinx, could step on me. Also, she has mentioned the fact that in the classical Greek myth Oedipus actually gave the wrong answer. I've been dying to know what is the true answer the the classic sphinx riddle, but unfortunately I don't think it will be revealed...

The way they defeated Conquest was, to me, a total copout. I couldn't fully follow Blake's plan until it was all over, and I can't understand why Conquest needed to travel into the mirror world to catch Rose when previously he just pulled her out of it like it was nothing. It just felt anticlimactic to me.

Also, please, can we actually just give him an actual arsenal of stuff he can use? I know Wildbow likes to keep his protagonists as the underdog but this is getting ridiculous. This magic system allows for basically anything but still our main man only has two or three tricks up his sleeve at any time and is constantly losing resources as fast as he can get more of them.

Last time I saw Blake he was swallowed whole by an ontophagic demon, being completely erased from reality as we know it and leaving Rose to steal his life. I know he'll come back, he's the protagonist after all, but I'm really excited to see how it will play out. Will he fight his way out Hell itself? Like Kratos??

The spoilers I already got

I don't care that much about spoilers, but still would like to avoid them if possible. I decided to list here what I could already gather from the future of the story simply by osmosis from the fandom:

There will be a mermaid called Green Eyes who is super cute in a “bite your face off" kind of way.

Blake will become part tree(?).

The ending is bittersweet at best.

Next

[motley-box-rose-1]

Thoughts on Ohkubo's "new artsyle" for Soul Eater one can see in the new artbook/art gallery thing? To me, in general I didn't really vibe with the style in his twitter doodles, but, being allways the contrarian, I actually kinda get what he's going for when looking at the gallery anouncment art and the cover for the artbook. Still it isnt my favorite style by far, but I also think it has some merit, so I was wondering how others feels - besides the consensus of it "sucking" lol

Okay, just looked it up and, honestly, I’m not super into it, but I understand that artists generally shift their style over time. Some of it looks a little creepy— not in a way I like, unfortunately— but we all know he’s a talented artist who can draw in a lot of different styles, so I’ll count it a win that he drew some Soul Eater stuff at all.

That said, I couldn’t find many pictures of his new style, so take my opinion with a grain of salt. If I see any more of it I’ll probably have a firmer opinion.

[rachaellawrites]

OC Questions Tag

I was tagged by @tabswrites. Thanks!

Answering for Ella from TWaTC:

5 words to physically describe your OC (do you have a drawing? even better!)

short, brunette, pale, fit, young

Who inspired your OC? (can be your mum to a very famous thing fungi)

The original vibe of this character was actually loosely inspired by an art piece from Sara Alfageeh, showing a girl on a skateboard carrying a sword. You can see it here.

Give me a song to define your OC (I will listen to it to enture in your WIP mood!)

I'm very, very bad at assigning music to my own characters and WIPs, unfortunately. I literally have never made a character/WIP playlist, but the more I see questions like this come up in writing tags and ask games, the more I feel like I should try.

If I met your OC on the street how would they greet me?

Honestly, she probably wouldn't. Ella is not a "smiles/waves at strangers" kind of person.

Can your OC be your best friend? Why?

I don't think I could be Ella's friend because I think I would be too intimidated to talk to her if she was a real person lmao

1 adjective and 1 noun to describe your OC (blue soul)

stubborn contrarian.

Gently tagging: @vcaudley @lyssa-ink @arionawrites

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Yes I'd love to know your take on all the characters too!

Haha sure thing! Forgive me if this is a bit long, I just wrote whatever first came to mind about each of them! Feel free to let me know what you guys think too, I’m certainly not the end-all-be-all!

Under the cut for length, a continuation of this post:

Number four is our illustrious cad, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. I must admit I haven’t read all that much of his content personally, since I have trouble on a personal level. But given the tangential things I’ve seen and his appearances in other routes, I like the complexity of his character composition. He’s incredibly hedonistic and lives in the moment; he doesn’t seem to care one bit in regards to the potential consequences of his actions, and every second is something to think about as a writer—if he’s not teasing Isaac within a hairsbreadth of a stroke.

In truth, I don’t think that surface level interpretation actually encompasses every facet of who he is. Because he also has remarkable moments of insight and deduction (though wrongly attributed to him because of the Sherlock books), and he does have odd moments of compassion for people/the MC. They ring a little hollow for me, but I can appreciate that he cares in a way that makes sense to him. I think a lot of his behavior speaks to his negligence of self; I have to wonder if his devil-may-care attitude is a means to communicate to others that he doesn’t deserve to be cared for (if he won’t ‘take them seriously’, then neither will they in regards to him, no?).

Granted, I’m sure his route will prove to have equal depth to the ones we’ve seen before, but my own preferences preclude a pretty resolute lack of interest.

Tl;dr: Probably has some level of narrative depth, but given the content I’ve seen he’s a little too aggressive and selfish for me to appreciate or enjoy it. Rated T for possible big trauma/turning point buried underneath all that, as well as big feels when he chooses you by the end.

Also if it’s no trouble, I would like to offer a trigger warning to any who wish to do his route when it does come out. I don’t know if his MS has any traces of assault/molestation, but I have read a few ES’s in which he does things to the MC that she does not seem to want/does not consent to. It was a very unpleasant surprise for me, so I understand if anyone would rather avoid it.

Number five is our sunshine painter, Vincent van Gogh. Needless to say, given that he appears to be a fan favorite, he’s another suitor that’s just so easy to love. He’s sweet and gentle no matter the situation, and has a remarkable ability to lighten a room simply by being there. But don’t let that quiet and shy disposition fool you; he’s actually a lot sharper than he looks.

He’s among my bias favorites, and the reason why is more simple than you’d think. I’m sure I don’t need to explain that he’s incredibly compassionate. He’s always thinking about what he can do to ease people’s hearts, always meets others with warmth and a beaming smile. But he’s not an airhead. He’s not kind because he doesn’t know any other way to be; near every second of it is a choice that he voluntarily makes. There are moments where this strength shines all too true, and he proves he’s much more than a pretty, sweet face. When the stakes rise, he rises with them.

Though—and do forgive me, Vincent—I’m inclined to agree a bit with his brother, Theodorus. He can be a little too yielding to the more negative forces in his life, a little too compassionate towards people that are frankly threatening. But he insists that he’s willing to work hard for his happiness, that he has no intention of waiting for someone to hand it to him—he’s ready to make sacrifices and work. And I think that sentiment, that fortitude after such a difficult life, is what makes him so admirable. He’s not just generous, he’s strong enough to give all that he can and thrive at the same time. He has such a remarkable capacity for hope given everything he’s been through, and it’s something that I love about him—I can’t help but respect it, even if I’m a bit more cynical lmao

Tl;dr: Absolutely the softest and goodest boy I have ever seen in my life, 11/10 would marry and cherish forever—die mad about it Theo. Much more intriguing than what a first glance offers, I invite you to do his route even if you have doubts; I don’t think you’ll be disappointed. I live for his surprising moments of sass and seriousness, and if I’m honest he and his MC seem to have some of the best chemistry in the game because of how directly he addresses any miscommunication/confusion between them. (He also loves hanky panky, as our esteemed Sebastian puts it, so jot that down).

Speaking of, “if anyone so much as looks at Vincent the wrong way I’m killing everyone in this room, including myself”, number seven is Theodorus van Gogh (number six is Isaac in the game’s main story order, but transitioning—you know how it is). I…truly don’t know how to encompass him in a few words, but I’ll do my best!

Everyone’s probably more than aware at this point, but he lives with the single-minded goal of protecting his brother and promoting new talent. A workaholic and fiercely protective of the only family he has left, he tends to be pretty terse and harsh with other people—abrasive. But he has such distinct moments of warmth (even if they’re still coarse as hell), and he gets down to the truth of a situation in milliseconds; wit as sharp as any knife. Unlike his brother, he is totally fine with violence if he deems it warranted, and he has a much harder time granting forgiveness. It goes without saying that he has a much, much harder time sharing what’s in his heart and healing as compared to Vincent.

I think my favorite thing about Theodorus is just how multi-faceted he is. At any given moment his range of emotion or reactivity varies, and I actually think it’s very natural? I think he’s just someone that responds to a situation after carefully measuring just how comfortable he is showing his own cards—and sometimes he reacts without thinking at all because he’s too overwhelmed with emotion to care (unsurprisingly, the opposite of his brother, who’s generally more placid/visibly unresponsive). One wonders—though I think it’s likely the case—whether or not he’s much more expressive by comparison precisely because Vincent was unable to express himself with such unfettered honesty.

Overall, he tends to keep his distance from people. And yet, even if his admiration for someone is a rare thing, when he does admire them he well and truly means it to the core. Equally put, if he loves somebody he loves them with every fiber of his being—to the point where he will give up near everything important to him to preserve their happiness. If I were to describe it in a word, I suppose I would say that he’s incredibly volatile. He lives, to an extent, in extremes; even if he’s still able to see traces of the gray in-betweens. I fully expected to find him and his route forgettable/unpleasant, but he grew on me before I even realized it! 

Also just gonna put it out there, his interactions with Vincent are friggen ADORABLE. This big, looming, scowling swagger on legs seconds from tears whenever Vincent looks after him. Or how he hesitates and droops when Vincent scolds him. I just can’t they’re too much! For a guy that calls us dog in the Japanese version of the game he sure follows Vincent like an adorable puppy 😂

Tl;dr: Despite his frigid countenance, he’s a lot more bark than he is bite (yes I did that on purpose, do your worst fangface). Once you dig deeeeep deep under all that acerbic tongue-lashing (not the fun sort, unfortunately) you will find somebody that’s surprisingly soulful, and much kinder than he’ll ever let on. I very rarely know just what to expect from him, and while he can be a bit domineering, his heart is almost always in the right place.

Boomeranging back to number six is our adorable apple and baby of the house, Sir Isaac Newton. I’ve honestly been really happy to see how much love he’s been getting in this first route release for the big three, given that he’s such a sweetheart. Consumed with anxiety and very, very socially awkward; our boy is doing his best despite being big confused a lot. He likes to stick to math and physics where things make sense, and I can’t really blame him. He presumably asked to be given new life to do more studying—and if that doesn’t say anything about how isolated and lonely this man has been, I’m not really sure what does.

He’s also a bit of a mixed bag, like Theo. He seems to have a self-esteem located at the bottom of the Marianna’s Trench; and yet, has oddly courageous moments when he’s trying to help others (most especially Jeanne). While he can appear to be contrarian and bitterly defensive, he’s more brittle and nervous than anything else upon closer inspection. He’s too quiet and painfully shy to involve himself in conversation, to the point where he literally enjoys being teased about apples in the house—because at least he feels like he’s involved/belongs, that way. He’s distant and reserved, but isn’t lacking in warmth or compassion—he just expresses it in roundabout ways (I mean good lord, the boy felt bad waking up his own coachman). It can be hard to describe, but it seems like he’s always battling against his social anxiety—and sometimes it wins, sometimes he does.

I think what I love best about Isaac is how hard he tries, despite it all. Despite everything he’s lost, despite the droves of people that assumed the worst of him in life—he keeps trying, against all hope, to understand and be understood. Even when he’s afraid of being hated, even when he fully expects to fail, he picks himself back up and reaches out—no matter how difficult it is for him. All he ever asks of the MC is to bear with him while he tries to find those answers and meet her halfway, and honestly I think that’s the sweetest thing ever.

Tl;dr: Lost on the path of life but doing his best, all he’s ever really wanted is someone to call friend (girlfriend, if you’re so inclined). A little fragile and a little timid, all he needs is a gentle nudge in the right direction.

Next up, number eight, is the renowned veteran Jeanne D’Arc. Another bias boy (my list is endless for this game, lord) his route is my second favorite right behind Leonardo’s. Superbly written and paced, every moment of romancing him was raw and heartfelt.

Without giving too much away, he is taciturn and reclusive to the extreme—I’m talking hermit levels. But I loved that personally; it makes total sense that a man born literally four hundred years ago is going to be confused and overwhelmed by the level of stimuli present in the turn of the 20th century. And given how, much like Isaac, he has enormous levels of social anxiety—it makes for a very difficult way of life. The other men do their best to accommodate him, but there are other reasons why he avoids getting too close to people, no matter their good intentions (that part is a route spoiler so I’ll leave it to your imagination c:).

I think what I loved best about his route was how much it was about helping each other heal. And while some otomes can fall into trap of MC becoming his therapist (I’m not naming names—Mysme) it doesn’t feel that way at all, at least not to me. Granted, she does a lot to get him out of his shell, but it’s more because she wants to get along with him than some odd belief that he needs her help (also bc of wingmen Mozart and Sebastian—yes it was as amazing as it sounds). Not unlike Leonardo’s route, they both recognize the beauty that dwells deep within each other, and they fall in love without even having to think about it. They become just what the other wants and needs, without even trying—truly as natural as falling.

Which brings me to the other thing I love so, so much about Jeanne: his kindness. Despite everything he’s been through, despite decades filled with loneliness and pain and trauma—he’s no less gentle for it. He’s always putting MC before himself, always telling her to look after herself first and insisting he’s nothing but a nuisance. He treats her with all the tenderness in the world, and even jokes around with her in his moe, silly way. He’s charming and delightful and sweet, even if he can’t see it.

Tl;dr: One of my favorite otome routes to date. Falling in love with him felt as natural and as easy as breathing, and every single time I see him those feelings come rushing back. What he lacks in worldliness, he makes up for in pure passion and fierce consideration for the people he holds close to his heart.

At number nine lies our Monsieur Guillaume, better known as William Shakespeare. Where on earth do I begin with this one, I have no idea. He’s…a wild card to say the least, though a strangely methodical one? Jeanne’s Japanese route only served to confuse me all the more, to say nothing of Vincent’s route. Part of me wonders if he suffers from the narrative confusion that often results from making a suitor a primary antagonist at the same time. (Though I will admit, the fact that he barely even tries in Leonardo’s route bc: 1. Everyone’s terrified of Le Comte’s/Leonardo’s legitimate wrath 2. He deadass says LEONARDO CLOWNS HIMSELF HARD ENOUGH AND MAKES HIMSELF SO MISERABLE HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE TO TRY. WHAT KIND OF GOD TIER, ACCURATE ROAST. I’m sorry I just needed to come clean about that one, I’ve been laughing about it for years).

From what I understand he only really operates in two modes: extremely obsessive (and violent) or a complete lack of interest. Le Comte explains it much better than I do, but Shakespeare is a bit of a perfectionist; he wants an impeccable performance from a perfect, naturally acting cast. But MC tempers this with the correct analysis that he also has a very, very dark lack of compassion for other people. He truly does seem to have fae blood in that way; created for the sole purpose of dangerous mischief and dissembling. His poetic speech feels a little over the top, but it makes sense that he would speak in a flowery, distracting, and elaborate way if his goal is to keep his distance.

I find it…borderline terrifying that he gets along with Vincent because of the aftermath of Vincent’s trauma. As a result of the eldest van Gogh’s backstory, he tends to be “doll-like.” That is to say, as I mentioned, he very rarely expresses any depth of emotion. Shakespeare states that it lessens his temptation to want to make his life a tragedy like everyone else’s, and I suspect there is a level of envy hidden there. Shakespeare hates seeing other people express themselves openly; especially in terms of hope or love, because it is something he doesn’t feel he can have or because he believes it is fated to end in tragedy (or both?). His reasons seem to get pretty convoluted and can vary given the narrative goal, so I may only be partially correct here.

Tl;dr: If I’m honest, I don’t really feel anything for Shakespeare that’s positive—though I admit I do wonder about his intentions and what his route will amount to (sheer, morbid curiosity lol). I think he may have the potential to be redeemed—given that there are clear mentions of people going wrong from the turning process. But in general I find much of his behavior to be kind of appalling. At least it’s fun to watch le Comte punt kick him around when he’s done horrible things, lol (forgive me Shakespeare-lovers, it’s a bit cathartic for me)

Diez for our favorite (H)osamu Dazai, accomplice and enabler of Arthur’s thottery. He’s much simpler and somehow just as confusing as Shakespeare to get a handle on, and his content is pretty limited, but I’ll do my best to encompass what I understand!

Honestly, I find him a little fascinating in that he truly seems to believe that he’s good at keeping his distance; evading contact with MC, constantly calling her by the wrong name, and teasing her with his dramatic digressions—on the surface level, the implication is there. The game is very subtle about his moments of genuine unrequited feeling and adoration; if you blink it’s easy to miss. When a crisis hits, he uses her given name. When he’s frustrated that she’s not being treated as she deserves, he speaks out. He even tries the whole big brother schtick, though she brushes it aside (he was shooketh). Perhaps the abundance of third person narration makes it easier to tell (than it might be for MC) but I find he’s less convincing than he is stalling/avoiding the truth. Which begs the question. Why is he trying so hard if it seems half-hearted/forced?

The possibilities are, admittedly, myriad. My best guess is that he yearns for company even if he avoids/fears the commitment. I imagine a big part of his route will be getting him to accept the concept of companionship—no matter how much the idea scares him. I find it a little ironic, though, that for a man so desperate to die he says it wasn’t as fun as he thought it might be. Are the limitations his mental illness placed on him among his considerable regrets, enough that he felt compelled to try again in a new life? Only time will tell, I suppose.

Tl;dr: A little scatter-brained and a lot flighty, he’s lacking in conviction but not in compassion—and he may be a lot sharper than he first lets on. Rife with some sort of emotional/mental hardships, be prepared for a long, difficult ride if he’s among your favorites! It makes me wonder if MC will be reason enough for him to find meaning and peace in life for once, not unlike Jeanne’s rt. A girl can hope~

Ah yes, we arrive at another deeply beloved bias, Le Comte de Saint-Germain. I very much doubt there are words to encompass how much I love this man, but I will do my very best for your sake—and for his (it’s what he deserves).

Le Comte is a mystery to all but Leonardo, it would appear; right down to his alias. And in intriguing accordance with that fact, he is at times the epitome of a genteel nobleman—until he’s ready to unleash a flagrant can of whoopass to protect people. I think what I love best about him is that he’s quite literally a walking contradiction, in many senses of the word. He’s a gentleman with the heart of a punk/delinquent, only civil until a dispute carries too far. Saint Germain is the definition of a brittle character (something I have always been incredibly fond of in stories); I can never quite get a read on him. My best guess would be to say that while he’s patient, he’s also unpredictable. It’s not always clear how affected he’ll be by something or what he’s feeling. But when it becomes too much for him to bury within, you better believe everyone in a five mile radius can feel the aftermath. You’ll all come to understand what I mean, hopefully, but it’s the precise reason Leonardo becomes friends with le Comte—and why he continues to fascinate me.

And as odd as it sounds, I love how simple he is too, to some extent? No matter how convoluted the specifics of a situation get or blame is thrown around, he always cuts to the core of the issue—and doesn’t let anyone sidetrack that. He’s cautious, but not entirely incapable of being forthright; just choosy about when, where, and how. Which begs the question. Why does he always hold back so distinctly with MC? Side stories in the Japanese version suggest some very deeply rooted, agonizing fear that makes him avoid getting close to her no matter how much he likes her. I have theories, but nothing solid quite yet. All I know for now is that he is slightly shady, very benevolent, and a whole lot lonely.

Tl;dr: He’s literally the definition of the meme “aren’t you tired of being nice? don’t you just wanna go apeshit.“ Works to be gentle and understanding, but the second he deems somebody has gone too far he will act with surprising, swift, and deadly vehemence. He’s very sweet and surprisingly possessive/direct about his affections—though he often plays it off like a joke. I always find it funny though, when some of the residents—especially Arthur/Shakespeare—know they’ve gone too far and they just look up to his dark, saccharine smile like FUCK. 11/10 I’ve been waiting centuries for this man Cybird, pls set me free And last, but certainly not least, we have our distinguished butler, Sebastian. I love this big ol' nerd but can't deny that he does me a bit of a frighten. He can do...literally anything on the domestic front, and frankly its a bit alarming 😂😂

Just as the little question mark next to his description as stoic indicates, he goes for the whole unruffled English butler vibe and nails it for the most part. He's even got the witty banter down! But he's also pretty direct and unapologetic about his love for historical figures--and the stalkerish lengths he'll go to to observe them all. (I mean come on, this fool literally overshares about himself in milliseconds if you let him). Granted I can't fault the man for doing what makes him happy. Like Isaac, I just have to resist the urge to gently shove him into a locker sometimes lmaoAs for his romantic potential, I think the possibilities really range. From what little I've seen, I think he might be a bit like Mozart? He seems very unaccustomed to social interaction--and given his backstory he was more interested in books and people long dead than the ones beside him. He also has a bit of that fastidiousness to him, a bit stern and awkward despite moments of warmth. I think he can be more preoccupied with cutting straight to the truth sometimes than he is about figuring out how a person needs to be spoken to (re: what is tact?). And that's charming in it's own way, though the result can be hilarious inadvertent moments of callousness--quite literally photo taken seconds before disaster lmfao. (I think my favorite instance of this was when he was trying to reassure MC once and totally fucks it up, only to see her start panicking and go "Oh shit, I stepped on a verbal landmine, didn't I" and then Comte comes to the rescue) Tl;dr: Honestly, I think he'll be a really cute love interest even if I am all about the vampires in the game. He's his own kind of genius, even if he doesn't see it, and deserves just as many hugs! And I think he severely underestimates how sexy it is for a man to willingly share in the responsibilities required of a household. Get you a man as capable and sharp as Sebas LOL

[zisurru]

my big bad list o’ bartimaeus fanfic recs (updated september 2020)

it’s long so I put it under a cut. [unfinished] means the fic has been apparently abandoned :(

Gen:

On Names, and Becoming Them by me malum: "You have many names," the old crone continued. "Did you know you've gained another?" Bartimaeus, in the centuries after 'Ptolemy's Gate'.

Hair by Kyuunen: Jane Farrar wishes she could lock away the razor and the shaving cream. Lock them away forever.

In the End by Volkie: In a way, she was glad. She would rather die than live in a London controlled by commoners and second-raters.

Ties that Bind by chibideath: Concerning what happens to Kitty Jones and Bartimeaus following the end of Ptolemy's gate. A story about names, hearts, and what comes with being human.

Of Uruk by electrumqueen: Five stories of origin for the djinni known as Bartimaeus of Uruk, as told to Ptolemy of Alexandria over the course of his research. Some of them might even be true.

one day you will go away from this by electrumqueen: Enkidu becomes a real boy; Bartimaeus is dubious about the process. Uruk changes everyone who comes into her walls.

coda by asdfghjkla:  a series of unrelated prompts taking place during and after the events of ptolemy's gate. spoilers for everything. mostly kitty and kitty+bart focused.

Of Pentacles, Rocking Chairs, and Presumed Deaths by yonwords: Kitty summons Bartimaeus after the events of Ptolemy's Gate. 

Far From Home by Contrarian: Bartimaeus is summoned for the first time after Ptolemy's death.

After Icarus by Bialy: The boy in the pentacle is skinny and pale, and forever twelve years old. He has dark, combed hair, and his black eyes are locked on the thick chalk line at his feet. He is regretting this form. Oneshot, five years after the end of Ptolemy's Gate.

o brother you are not by DrMeh: He's always tried his hardest to forget the difference between cowardice and courage, Nick has.

Semantics by TheAliensDidIt: Detailing the exploits of Bartimaeus of Uruk (i.e. moi), the Serpent of the Silver Plumes, N'gorso the Mighty, the Bane of Magicians, in great battles of wit and cunning... you'd best say your incantations correctly and pray your pentacle has no faults, for if there is one, I will find it.

Untitled by @notaflower whom tumblr won’t let me tag

Untitled by @joons​

Stages by @tarragonthedragon​: Faquarl's view of Bartimaeus over time changes, and ultimately, stays the same. Their very nature seems to revert them to the status quo of uneasy disdain.

three doors, three souls by @avinryd​: “B-” He clears his throat. “Bartimaeus?”(He's not sure where that name came from.)The boy blinks, then shakes his head. “No, my name is Ptolemy.” He looks expectant, as if waiting for a response.And what to respond? Does he have a name? After a moment of thought he decides, yes, he does have a name: Nathaniel. He says as much and Ptolemy smiles.“Hello, Nathaniel,” and it sounds so right and familiar in his voice that Nathaniel aches.

it doesn’t really bear thinking about by @avinryd​: "He wonders, vaguely, what might have changed if they’d lived; all three of them against the world. It doesn’t really bear thinking about, but then again, he’ll be dead in moments. Why not spend those dwelling on happier things?"

Cats by @tarragonthedragon: Prompt: Bartimaeus and Queezle being happy. Maybe one of their adventures?

Just One Yesterday by @shadowy-dumbo-octopus: Bartimaeus stumbles upon an old enemy, and sees them in a new light after certain events from the last book.

a song skims over the nile, by dolokhovian: call it the earth turning.

Untitled by @shadowy-dumbo-octopus: Evil Nat AU!

A Road Trip (A Disgusting Human Invention) by @tarragonthedragon: In which a magician, a spirit, and a commoner are crammed into the cramped space of a single Honda Civic and are unable to stop and shout at each other. It's not going to end well.

Bartimaeus/Nathaniel:

Thorn by Maiden of the Moon: Nathaniel was a thorn in Bartimaeus' side. But now that he is dead, now that the thorn is gone, the resulting wound is free to fester and ooze and bleed...

Chaos by Maiden of the Moon: Sometimes, I understand why he hates me.

Distractions by Maiden of the Moon: The djinn flopped backwards, rearranging his puppet's toned body and dark hair in a sexy sprawl on his master's desk. “Why?” the demon pressed, voice husky with suggestion. “Do you find this distracting?”

It’s A Harsh Thing by Existence’s Bane:  For each breath taken... 

Written Aramaic and Other Tips for Everyday Living by Kyuunen: Somehow, in the thrum of everyday life, the djinni that drives Nathaniel to near insanity is the only thing keeping him sane.

miserable company by BoltAcid: Nine cheesy, mismatched prompts and one familiar, mismatched pair.

warm chromatic by atrophie: bartimaeus is on a desk and annoying nathaniel, as usual.  

A Very Fetching Rug by ThePurpleRose: Nathaniel, you have a very feching rug in your hall." Bartimaeus plans to bring out the Nathaniel out of John Mandrake. Involves necklaces, guilt trips, soaps, coat stands and rugs.  

As We Dream by the Fire by Wit Unraveled: Time progresses and turns to evolution; seasons decay into change. Magician boys do both. - In honor of the season; there's just something about all this snow.

Untitled by @chokopoppo

Untitled Part 1 Part 2 by @princefado

no dose of emotional chemotherapy (can halt my pathetic decline) by @singacrossthemoon: For all of his sarcasm, all of his acerbic wit, Bartimaeus could not, for the life of him, remember the last time anyone had treated him with anything less than nauseating kindness, never mind such immediate, obvious distain. I think, he realized in a rush, that I am in love.

love is colder than death by izzybusiness: Bartimaeus first meets Nathaniel at eight-thirty on a Monday morning. It’s not the most auspicious of meetings. Then again, when you’ve taken a job as a barista with the sole purpose of poisoning someone’s drink, he supposes that any sort of meeting is favourable to its end. 

love is colder than death au fics by @singacrossthemoon​ [Series]

one for the money (two for the pain) by @singacrossthemoon: Or: Five times someone asks about John Mandrake, and one time Bartimaeus talks about Nathaniel. [Content warning: sexual assault]

fire and air by @transarty: Nathaniel wants to see Bartimaeus' true form - but what could he possibly expect? Bartimaeus delights and frights over this. / light bartnat and headcanon on bart's shape, feelings and a little mush  

Bartimaeus/Kitty:

Autumn Leaves and the Endless Fall by otherworldviolet: Kitty dies. This is about what happens next. [Unfinished] [Content warning: brief mention of sexual assault in Chapter 3]

Of Fire and Roses by Anti-Logic: But this was different. That place had been all gentle waves and currents, always intermingling and flowing. This was a world of fire and roses. [Unfinished]

Of Auras and Oracles by conception.creation: The trilogy is complete, but Bartimaeus’ adventures are far from over. When a prominent politician goes missing, Kitty and Bartimaeus must find him, but who is behind the mysterious attacks on Kitty’s life?

Monomyth by conception.creation: Nouda didn’t die in the Glass Palace explosion. Now Kitty must rely on her wits to survive in a post-apocalyptic London overrun with enemy spirits.

The Haunting by conception.creation: A rebel turned demon hunter treks across the world in pursuit of escaped hybrids. Now she must track down a spirit with a mysterious agenda, and nothing is as it seems.

Restless Spirit by conception.creation: Quick thinking saves Kitty from assassination – unfortunately, she’s now without a body. Can she solve her own murder in time to stop a massive conspiracy threatening Britain itself?

Panache by conception.creation: When Bartimaeus' master sends him out to win him the hand of a beautiful commoner, he doesn't expect the djinni to fall for her himself. Based on the play Cyrano de Bergerac.

That Awful Rush To Say Goodbye by cacophonyGilded: Hope is what kills you. Kitty knows that. Bartimaeus, somehow, is still learning.  

children of dust and ash by callunavulgari: Kitty summons Bartimaeus on a chilly fall day in her thirty-eighth year. Her children are at school. There is no husband. She is alone in the house, save for a fat persian who slumbers happily on a cushion in the window seat downstairs. The persian, she knows, will not wake before noon.The words are familiar to her, and she does not stumble over them. Smoke billows into the room, as expected, but instead of a creeping sulfurous stench, there is the faint smell of sandalwood and wet earth. When the smoke clears, Bartimaeus is there.

the way to the graveyard by @singacrossthemoon​: Djinn are beings of fire, Kitty realizes anew; they leave naught but ash in their wake.

Bartimaeus/Kitty/Nathaniel:

stars are projectors by asdfghjkla:  Someone is kissing her. She is not sure which one he is.

Entertainment by princefado:  In which Kitty and Bartimaeus double team Nathaniel. In a skirt. Gratuitous smut.

the root of the root by @singacrossthemoon​: The pyre burns with the misery of passion. She does not try to stop it.

Bartimaeus/Kitty/Ptolemy:

this isn’t our first time around by nighimpossible: It seems that the spirit she thought was dead and gone isn’t so dead after all. Kitty could spit she’s so furious.“This is about the worst way you could tell me you’re alive, Bartimaeus,” Kitty grits through her teeth. Her fingers curl against the countertop, nails nearly cutting into the wood.The man gives her a confused look. “Sorry,” he says carefully. “I think you’re mistaking me for someone else.”

Kitty/Nathaniel:

The Matchmaker by conception.creation: Eight lousy, stinking months have gone by and Nathaniel still refuses to let him go home. Bartimaeus gets creative.

Bartimaeus/Ptolemy:

Eyeliner by Chokopoppo: Generally, I’m known for my keen eye and my acute knowledge of universal human culture. There are few others, even among humans themselves, who so completely understand the workings of their past, present, and inevitably future, as I do. Few things are beyond my scope of great knowledge.This, apparently, was one of those things.

Coffee by Chokopoppo: He would follow the boy to the ends of the earth in every cycle of time, if he could.So he does.

Choices by Chokopoppo: He needs flight, he needs home, he needs the stars and dark eyes and shifting essence and warm skin and vast great oneness and a gentle fragile voice calling his name but he cannot have both the Other Place and Ptolemy and the universe has made his choice for him.

As Far As Adventures Go, It Was Pretty Okay by jonesandashes: Judge not - developing a proper threat rapport does not happen in a day. We got better.

drives you crazy getting old by electrumqueen

and we talk of things that matter, in words that must be said  by @lupevensies

Lullaby by @shadowy-dumbo-octopus: In which Ptolemy refuses to sleep because who needs sleep when there's research to be done? This forces Bartimaeus to try and get him into bed before the poor kid burns himself out. Short and fluffy.

Bartimaeus/Queezle:

Battlecry by The Sad Privateer: "You are either a genius, or the luckiest idiot on the planet," she remarks to him one day. "And I'm leaning towards the latter."

Bartimaeus/Faquarl:

Hold Your Colour by otherworldviolet: Faquarl comes to Bartimaeus with a proposition. Set during Ring of Solomon.

A Mirror Darkly by badpriestess: Two entities so alike yet so crucially different can't help but clash, but in the end they always come back to each other.

Anger Was Good by @lupevensies​

Eeeuuuggghjjjjj by meanfrogs: Bart and Faq con non suspecting people into buying terrible copper in some market stall in Ur. They hate each other and also kiss, hell yeah

Faquarl/Jabor:

Why you should never cut your fingernails in the kitchen by JTJonah: So Jabor and Faquarl are discussing ways to ruin Lovelace (as per usual) and then - you know what, we all know what you came here for, they swive okay they swive and that's all we're here for, I hope you're all goddamned happy with the results.

Indoor Voices by JTJonah: So they had just broken into a tomb in the middle of nowhere.

Khaba/Ammet:

The Master's Shadow by badpriestess: Khaba has been inadvertently cruel, and Ammet's dissatisfaction comes to a head.

Untitled by @madanach​

More Thank Your Shadow by bluebeholder

Multiple ships:

Just Hold Me Close by Chokopoppo: A series of reincarnation romance AUs, set within the writing constraints of the Songfic Challenge from the early 2000s.

quiescency by @singacrossthemoon: “What a beautiful portrait,” the teenager gasps, his admiration genuine. “Is it of me?” The boy pauses, reconsidering the picture. It is yet unfinished. He cannot recall when he started it. “No,” he says at length.

[kikaromi]

Yggdrasil RP -- Julius Finds Out the Truth About Ludger

PoV: Julius calls Elle and finds out Ludger died long, long ago. Not appreciating he’s been lied to, Julius takes the soonest opportunity to confront the Spirit of Darkness about letting him continue to think Ludger was alive.

SoD tells him the truth and wonders how Julius feels about this development. Julius answers thusly. 

“I’m certainly not happy you lied to me by omission,” Julius recognized the irony of his complaint, being rather infamous even among his allies for telling half-truths. A lasting bad habit from his need-to-know basis DODA years. “But... I also understand your reasoning. If I’d known Ludger was dead from the beginning, I don’t doubt I’d see little consequence in failing my mission. Letting me operate under the delusion I could have a second life with my brother was the optimal choice... so long as I didn’t find out the truth.”

Unfortunately Julius learned the hard way thanks to his own morbid curiosity; a conversation he had about his brother prompted him to toughen up and call Ludger’s GHS number. Elle picked up instead and broke the news to him: Ludger sacrificed himself to become the 1,000,000th Catalyst and save her. Elle had a couple questions for him (all of which went unanswered, couldn’t compromise the mission for anybody) and Julius hung up before his emotions overwhelmed him. Elle didn’t need to hear him breaking down over the phone.

Julius managed to hold back his tears at the time--he didn’t want to cause a fuss in front of his allies or say anything stupid in a fit of emotion--but the moment he was alone, everything broke down at once. He couldn’t get himself to stand, his glasses had tear stains all over them, and his mind read down an infinite list of ways he could’ve prevented this outcome. Origin knows how long he sat there in utter despair, though to his allies it seemed like a few minutes thanks to his powers makes it seem like he was gone for a fraction of the real time.

It wasn’t until he fulfilled the current objective he took the lull in activity to go straight to the Spirit of Darkness and confront him about the truth. And sure enough, the Spirit knew Ludger was already dead and kept it a secret this whole time. The breach in trust did hurt a little, but by the time he arrived back at the Yggdrasil, Julius thought about it from the Spirit’s perspective and managed to mend his upset feelings for the most part. All he wanted to do by the time he got here was confirm what he’d already guessed to be true.

“So what will you do now that you're aware? Do you wish to exchange your life for your brother’s once your mission is complete?”

“I do not.” His answer was... oddly contrarian, if the Spirit’s subtle surprise wasn’t Julius’ imagination. He’d explain why regardless, “I know if my brother had the choice, I would’ve been a part of his perfect world. But back then, I convinced myself that I didn’t belong there and thus forced Ludger into a situation where killing me was the only solution. It’s only in hindsight I can now see my arrogance and have the ability to fix it. I’m going to live in his world we succeed to make amends.”

“It’s definitely going to be weird going back home though-- I’ve got 12 years to catch up on apparently. Time flies when you’re a soul waiting to be reincarnated.” Julius chuckled at the thought of now being one of the youngest people in Ludger’s group. The only people he was older than would be Elize and Elle, and the former was by only a few years. Couldn’t call himself the “big brother” anymore, could he?

[kd-seikatsu]

https://www.quora.com/What-are-some-career-degree-choices-for-an-INFP-It%E2%80%99s-tough-finding-a-career-that-is-relatively-lucrative-and-satisfying-What-are-some-careers-that-INFPs-have-found-suitable-for-themselves-and-the-skillsets-education-required-to-enter-those-fields

---

Probably it’s best to write an entire book in this topic.

NOTE: Interestingly a psychologist may be great at personality research and counseling, but may be suboptimal in suggesting ideal career for any personality types especially for rarer types such as INFPs. It’s upto you to discover your own unique career pathway and learn from other INFPs. As they say - there are lots of differences between “knowing the path” and “walking the path”.

Given the current design of corporations (we are making great progress on building better governance models using decentralised tech such as Aragon and Liquid Democracy) and extrovert-obsessed (read ENTJ/Dale Carnegie types) business culture, cubicle jobs are ill-suited for INFPs. Buddha doesn’t belong to the Boardroom (Buddha was an INFP and HSP based on various cues given throughout his life and teachings; generalisation that all INFPs are destined to be an enlightened soul - Buddha - is also incorrect). In general growing automation and commoditisation will destroy many jobs in future (check at Will Robots Take My job?) . So pick jobs or careers that are somewhat immune to technical disruptions.

Even across INFP spectrum everyone is different and have different priorities for their values. Figure out top 6 values of yours and curve a career around that. May be it’s “Healing”, “Freedom” or “Sustainability” or “Philanthropy / Charity” or “Betterment of Mankind” or “Spirituality” or “Creative Expression” or a combinations of them.

“Freedom”, “Healing” and “Betterment of Mankind” are three dominant ones, for myself. Unfortunately our current socioeconomic setup is ill-designed to not to incentivise these values. That’s right ! If that would be the scenario, you would expect an economic policy like this -

15% reduction in long-term capital gain tax for shareholders investing in ventures with ESG (Environment / Social / Governance) rating > 7

Additionally, INFPs like other introverts generally prefer minimal ‘shallow’ social interactions but prefer deeper connections.

We may now start looking for areas with above criterion satisfied. However before embarking on that, I would suggest the “lifestyle template” (there are many “Keeping up with the joneses” / “Minimalism” etc.) of “FIRE” (Financially Independent Retired Early) to all INFPs. Psychologists may not be experts at finance, but leveraging capitalism to attain financial independence is a priceless advice given to those who value true “Freedom” above all. Learn about investment for passive income and frugality in order to ensure your monthly expenses are less than your passive income. There are some fantastic books and blogs (ex. Mr. Money Mustache) on that. So get into that track sooner than later. Once you are FIREed, several diverse and exotic interests (ex. Environmental Activism) usually nurtured within INFPs are now allowed to their fruition.

Now till you achieve FIRE, you may explore some of these jobs -

Psychologists (Private Practice) and Career Counsellors (Private Practice)

General Physician (GP) / Holistic GP (Private Practice / Shared Clinics; stay away from hospital politics. If you are looking at “purpose” or “meaning” and earnings, healthcare related professions are unmatched. PayScale Survey)

Librarian

Equity Research / Algorithmic Trading (Algo Trading is highly quant. As an INFP you may enjoy qualitative things or qualitative investment better. So don’t do it for long)

Risk Management / Analysis

Writing on Kindle platform (for self or for someone else)

Quantum Mechanics / Modern Physics

Professional Blogging

Small-scale entrepreneurship (cash-flow positive ones Venture Capitalists wouldn’t touch. With Silicon Valley/VC involvement privileged-background/extroversion starts playing important roles)

Radio Telescope Astronomy

Spiritual Healing / Meditation & Yoga teaching / Stress Management / Shamanism (It’s unfortunate that our modern scientific world-view has designated Shamanism as equivalent to “black magic” etc. A shaman is a spiritual healer. Across eastern and indigenous traditions, it has been believed that health is not just based on biochemistry. It has strong psycho-spiritual foundation. Ayurveda has similarly concept of ‘Chakras’. Life has bio-energetic and photonic basis as well. As an INFP if you would have born in an african tribe, you might end up being a Shaman - a spiritual healer - Healing the Luminous Body )

Nutrition and Naturopathy / Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) & Ayurveda / Massage Therapy / Cold Therapy ( Welcome to the Official Wim Hof Method Website ) / NIR Sauna Therapy / Supervised Prolonged Fasting Therapy (NOTE: pharmaceutical-funded research may try to convince you that these are unscientific methods, but do your own research. Science nowadays is under tight grip of profit-only capitalism)

Music

Anime Design / SciFi Illustration / 3D design for games and simulations

Hydroponic / Urban (Organic) Farming / Microgreens / Permaculture

Documentary (Nature / In-depth Journalism) Film-making

Economic (and/or Evolutionary) Anthropology (Not math-heavy at all, unlike it’s math-obsessed mainstream counterpart)

Artisan / Craftsmanship

NOTE: I’ve skipped the wonderful profession of Teaching on purpose. Contrarian it may sound, teaching requires a considerable degree of extroversion in the usual classroom setting. Moreover it also depends on the country’s/location’s dominant MBTI characteristics. For example, teaching in Australia (ESTP dominant) is very different from India (INFP-T dominant).

You can (and should) combine these templates. For example, you can be an awesome Naturopath and Professional Blogger blogging about Nutrition and Naturopathy. Or You can be a spiritual healer and spiritually inclined musician (I love the rare sub-genre of rural folk music with a spiritual connection. ex. - Mirror of the Sky: Songs of the Bauls of Bengal (UNESCO Collection of Representative Works: European) - Kindle edition by Deban Bhattacharya, Deben Bhattacharya. Arts & Photography Kindle eBooks @ Amazon.com.) healing souls with music.

Though can be quantitative, INFPs usually excel as qualitative analysts or semi-quantitative analysts in areas aligned to their value systems. Keen observers amongst you may have noticed that I have skipped more popular STEM areas like Computer Science. To be brutally honest, after years of unhappiness in long pursuit of science and engineering I have realised that the deconstructive objectivism (or reductionism) and implicit “unconscious” capitalism preached by western science is too ‘soul-less’ or empathy-less or ‘non-holistic’ (Please refer to this amazing book - Ascent of Humanity: Introduction | Charles Eisenstein for details) to the F of INFP (lately, few exceptions surfaced - Systems Biology / Complex Systems / Quantum Consciousnesses etc). To quote from the aforementioned book -

We seem to have forgotten that mathematics, and therefore the science and technology built on its scaffold, by its nature as abstraction leaves something out. So far our response has been that of the technical fix: to extend measurement still further to encompass those things left out—to remedy its failures with more of the same. On a conceptual level, this program hit a brick wall in the twentieth century with the development of quantum mechanics and chaos theory. On a practical level, we have so far failed to appreciate the lesson in the repeated failure of the program to better manage reality by reducing it to numbers. Instead we call for more numbers, more data.

…

Mathematics and measure are objective, in the sense that they vitiate objects of the particularity which resides in the interaction of observer and observed. They are consistent with separately existing objects that are "out there", external to our subjectivity, denying a principle common to ancient mysticism and modern physics that "existence" is a two-place predicate, an interaction. Today the concept of objectivity is central to our world view that includes ourselves as separate, discrete individuals. It also underlies classical physics and the Scientific Method, and it informs what we mean by the very adjective "scientific". To see how deeply it has influenced our perceptions, visualize something just "existing". Is your picture that of something floating by itself, alone? No wonder we feel so alone ourselves. To be is to be separate.

(Chapter 2: Mathematics & Measure)

So even though INFPs can be good at deep mathematics or statistics or other hardcore areas such as these, satisfaction can be elusive unless there is a higher ‘purpose’ (values alignment) thrown to it. To exemplify -

As an INFP you are more likely to appreciate Quantum Mechanics with an associated philosophical concept of Quantum Consciousness & Spiritual Discovery as opposed to generic challenges to scale a distributed network (Computer Science). Value alignment: “Spirituality”

As an INFP, you are more likely to appreciate data & engineering efforts (GraphDB / Data Forensics etc.) to support investigative journalism (such as Panama Papers) as opposed to an identical engineering challenge taken by an Ad Optimisation company. Value alignment: “Betterment of Mankind”

As an INFP, you are more likely to enjoy being an economist researching “socioeconomic inequality” as opposed to employed by a Bank devising “greedy & toxic” products such as Mortgage Backed Securities (MBS) or Asset Backed Securities (ABS). Value alignment: “Betterment of Society”

As an INFP, you are more likely to enjoy being a Yoga/Meditation teacher and Naturopath practising ancient healing techniques of Therapeutic Fasting, Vipassana Meditation, TCM & Ayurveda as opposed to a GP recklessly prescribing Blood Pressure and Cholesterol medications (It is now known that a good percentage of patients having high total cholesterol in blood has other underlying conditions such as secondary inflammation or hormone-imbalance or leaky-gut-induced low-grade endotoxemia) without discovering root cause first and then allowing body to heal naturally (in some cases medications may be necessity but to majority of us alternate healing techniques are not offered by default). Value alignment: “Healing”

Most of above-mentioned jobs are niche and it helps to start with a privileged background (it fails to generate enough monthly cash-flow at the beginning ). For unprivileged INFPs, attaining FIRE (alternatively, Tim Ferris-style mini-retirements) thus becomes important. Even if you end up picking another profession, at the very least, work on alignment of your primary values. For an INFP, this is crucial.

Re:

Don’t fall for the meme that - “Myers Briggs is useless”. For any classification framework, a set of people will say - ‘it is totally useless’, other set of people will vouch for it being perfect. Reality often floats somewhere in the middle. MBTI is an effort around “Top down classification / modelling” of personality research data. This is not an “Agent-centric Model (bottom up)”. Thus, often, it presents an over-simplistic view of things as complex as human personalities. Those who completely dismisses it may also dismiss - “modern top-down economics and GDP modelling is useless”. It’s true up to a point. Yet governments and traditional economists use its macro-levers to tune a country-wide economy. Same applies for psychology.

Don’t fall for the meme “Follow your passion”. For God’s sake, be passionate about topics you find interesting. However, please remember that miss-guided and ill-mentored passion should always remain slave to reason. Preaching “follow your passion” usually evokes a strong Confirmation Bias within all of us. However, to be happy and successful (sticking to it’s traditional definition), you need lots of ‘other stuff’ beyond passion. When we are young, we usually tend to disregard these ‘other stuffs’ (privilege / extroversion / probabilities etc; for example, barring few exceptions, its very hard to pursue a PhD/research-career in Quantum Gravity unless you get a solid support from your family both economically & emotionally and are able to navigate university politics). But as we age, we come to terms with things at ground especially when our miss-guided passion burns us out. Yes, “Passion Burnout” is a real thing. That’s why even you are passionate about a topic, maintain a degree of ‘detachment’ from it. As a bonus, it may even allow you to see things from a totally different perspective. Follow your passion with a degree of detachment after prioritising values-alignment over your passion.

Don’t fall for the meme “Anyone can make anything work”. Even though I hate rigid theories, have to mention the “Rubber Band” theory of personality - you have a base personality you are born with and you can flexibly stretch it to a maximum amplitude without causing considerable dissatisfaction. Don’t learn to fake extroversion and stretch beyond your amplitude for longer term. Instead always learn from anecdotal experiences of your own and other INFPs and research and introspect and experiment.

Read more works of Taleb especially Fooled by Randomness, The Black Swan, Antifragile (It’s amazing that a quantitative trader can write such volumes imbued with deep “qualitative” observations revolving around socio-economical and psycho-social issues). This will help you to systematically “un-condition” lots of existing socioeconomic conditioning that usually prefers (or artificially “selects”) a handful of MBTI types excluding INFPs . Lots of intuitions I had as an INFP got anecdotally (sometime statistically) validated by Taleb’s writings. He sometimes may sound arrogant and elitist, but that’s exactly what is needed to “see through” the orthodoxy and dogma prevailing over current socioeconomic systems and popular theories often contrarian to value systems cherished by INFPs. Those insights will definitely help you in selecting better careers or be better at your current career by constructively absorbing those “harsh” criticisms. Ascent of Humanity and Taleb’s Collections are some of the most impactful and “un-conditioning” (“Redpilled”) books I have ever read.

Thanks everyone for upvotes and comments

[marcusssanderson]

Why Imagination is More Important than Knowledge

Discover why imagination is more important than knowledge and why it makes our world better.

The eye can only see so many colors, but the artist using his or her imagination puts them together in ways that we never imagined and suddenly a blank canvas speaks to our souls.

While this voice seems real, we struggle to explain it to anyone and words fail to explain really why we love or hate the work.

Why is imagination important? Imagination has trumped knowledge in nearly every realm of study, yet we tend to nurture knowledge and leave imagination to the artists.

Yet, imagination is what brings revolution to business.  Henry Ford rethought how the assembly line might work and Steve Jobs rethought the phone.  Imagination makes our world work better.  Maybe we should nurture that as well.

Why imagination is more important than knowledge

Below are a few reasons on why imagination is more important than knowledge. Learn why it’s a powerful tool in life and why you should take the time to build it.

Imagination is unlimited

With the vastly overwhelming amount of knowledge out there it might seem radical to point out an unfortunate truth.  Knowledge is limited.  There is a finite amount of knowledge out there that our limited minds can take in and assimilate.

However, imagination is unlimited and we can freely use this powerful tool to explore the possibilities of how to utilize the knowledge at our disposal.

“I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.” ― Robert Fulghum,

Imagination is strength

A pile of Lego building blocks are sitting in the middle of the living room.  They have no life on their own.  Their assorted colors might be considered beautiful on their own but all together useless.

Now send in a group of six or seven year olds and set them free to build.  That mindless group of blocks suddenly learns to become a airplane, boat or building.  Anything the child has ever seen or dreamed of can be created out of those blocks.

What is not seen though is how this process strengthens the mind of the child.  The brain is exercised and strengthened.  Problems are solved at minute levels in the child’s mind and he or she discovers basic building principles like cantilevers and solid foundations to hold up their immense structures.

Their mind strengthens as they find pleasant combinations of colors and joy as they learn acceptance.  These skills are transferred to challenges at school and on the playground.  For the child this stronger mind makes them a force to be reckoned with in the highly competitive world of education where scholarships are on the line and colleges of choice are waiting.

Imagination is a fantastic exercise.

In the Contrarian Leader, author Steve Sample, shares a story of General Electric engineers solving a problem with a dishwasher using their imagination.

Using all of their mechanical and scientific knowledge at their disposal they put all the possibilities out on the table.  They could not come up with any solution.

Out of frustration they were challenged to try to solve the problem by using animal parts.  Using their imaginations they brought together elephant trunks and lion paws or monkey tails and suddenly the answer appeared.  Imagination succeeded where years of education and knowledge had failed.

Build your imagination

There are many ways to rekindle and grow the power you have to utilize your imagination.  Take up painting or sculpture.  Start on the cheap with play dough and crayons.  Create something, anything and imagine it coming to life.  Give it a voice and a heart.  Let it develop personality in your head.  Let your mind run with it and enjoy the process.

“Logic will get you from A to Z; imagination will get you everywhere.” ― Albert Einstein

Imagination will take you places:  Where would you go, do or buy if your current reality was not in play?  Take a trip to Mars or talk with great historical figures.

General Patton was believed to believe in reincarnation yet his staff historian, Martin Blumenson who authored many military histories, most notably The Patton Papers,  stated that he did not think Patton believed in reincarnation, but that his life-long study in history gave him such a sense of the places and events that he could talk like he had been there.

What sort of advantage would it give you to so know history and its leaders that you would have an almost déjà vu feeling when you step into the challenges.

Imagination can take you there

Build your imagination:  Create a diverse group and call them your historical counsel.  Study their lives in every way possible.  When you step into the unknown and have a challenge gather your counsel and listen to their advice.

Sometimes the wisdom of the ancients will help you to solve the impossible.  Make your counsel diverse in skill sets and culture and your counsel will be extremely rich and beneficial.

“Everything you can imagine is real.” ― Pablo Picasso

Imagination will ultimately bring us to reality

Have you ever thought about the fact that everything that we take for granted today was once stuck in someone’s imagination?  Today we have sinks in our home because someone was tired of walking down to the river with a bucket.

The idea that we could share blogs like this one with most of the world able to grab a hold of the information was once just simple fantasy.  Early movies tried to create what going to the moon would look like and likely sparked the desire in the scientists who worked to make those movies come true.

The IPOD was named from a scene in the movie 2001.  So much of what we see as common place in our world today became a reality primarily because of imagination.

Build something today

Build your imagination:  Build something today.  Don’t put it off.  You can use a kit if you like but it’s better if you don’t.  I once created a racetrack ramp out of old scraps of wood that were in the garage.

I built bumpers and tested it out with my boy’s matchbox cars.  They loved it.  But the building enabled me to utilize a portion of my brain that I need for creation.  This sort of exercise has enabled me to create programs and concepts that help men and women fight off addiction or other unhealthy behaviors.

Build a better mousetrap and you might stumble on things like the pocket fisherman or a way to capture pollution that actually saves money.  Have fun with it and don’t worry if it looks stupid.  My racetrack looked dumb but when the cars were racing the boys could care less.

Imagination is a very powerful tool that we tend to forget about and rarely use as it was designed.

Hopefully, this article has helped you understand why imagination is more important than knowledge. Take time this week to build your imagination and dream of a better world.

The post Why Imagination is More Important than Knowledge appeared first on Everyday Power.

[airoasis]

Andrew W.K. finds motivation in a good, noisy party

At some point in the mid'00s, Andrew W.K.'s career as a rock star started to stall, for factors that have never ever truly been made clear.W.K.

( born Andrew Wilkes-Krier) had launched an over-the-top party rock launching, "I Get Wet," in 2001, but had had a hard time to preserve his momentum. There were legal battles with an old partner of the singer, and there was a concern about who owned the rights to his identity.W.K.

began landing motivational speaking engagements, where he would preach the gospel of partying (Andrew W.K. likes to party more than anybody else likes anything). To W.K., partying is a tool that can be used to illuminate the look for transcendence, using exactly what he calls "a raised peek into the heart of all things."

A couple of months ago, W.K. launched "You're Not Alone," his very first rock album considering that 2006. In a phone interview in advance of his Saturday night show at the Vic Theatre, Andrew W.K., perhaps the only male alive to be compared with both Tony Robbins and Meatloaf, spoke about transcendence, anxiety, and the meaning of life.The following

is an edited records of that conversation:

Q: Existed a time that you believed this album might never ever come out?A: I suppose I went through every frame of mind. I've taken every point of view I could take. Frustration, resignation that perhaps I was never implied to make another album, as strange as that appeared. Often I felt like I had to accept it, and really, as soon as I did come to terms with that possibility is obviously when whatever started to happen.Q: There's a lesson in there somewhere.A: Oh yeah, for sure. So lots of lessons.Q: However you've taken a

terrific, uncommon profession path on your own.

Did you say, If I never ever make another album, Ill be OK?A: Well, I never stopped making music or tape-recording it, it just took a very long time. I was not able to see

exactly what others saw as a gap. It wasn't till somebody said,"Hey, it's been 10 years given that you released(an album ),"that was really stunning to me. I don't understand how to explain it or sum it up, since I do not comprehend it myself. I feel as if I'm following a path that I do not have total control over, and there's advantages to that method. Being resigned to your own destiny, you sort of turn over your will to the supreme power that is.Q: So what is'the ultimate power that is'? Fate? God? Karma?A: That's what everyone's been attempting to figure out and claimed for thousands and thousands and thousands of years. I guess for me, you search for a frame of mind to analyze the muddled elements of your life that makes them, if not completely reasonable, at least satisfying. You put your life in cinematic terms, so that even challenging the agonizing parts seems like it's all part of some type of purposeful plan that's being exposed to you. That's simply one way to look at life, and for me, it's made it more extreme in an excellent way.Q: It's fascinating to chart the evolution of your philosophy, how partying has gone from something that's fun to do to the way you take a look at the world.A From day one, to have this primary theme of partying, it provided a focus for me. The charm of the partying principle is that it's very one dimensional and easy to understand. Within that, you actually have actually had the ability to apply nearly every element of the human experience

and relate it to partying, which you can sort of do with anything. It's sort of like Dumbo's magic feather. It offers you that first little bit of self-confidence to dive deeper into life, then you understand it gave you strength to access your higher powers.Q: You have actually gone through your own tough times, been depressed. You have actually stated the guidance you provide is suggestions you wish to take yourself.A: Definitely. It's the full spectrum of human feeling, and a big part of what I'm aiming to do is not battle those sensations, don't range from them, not even attempt to slay them, however value them in some unreasonable method. It's easier stated than done, however the more difficult parts of life do develop character. Every encounter we have, every phenomenon, is the celebration gods trying to mold our soul into a shape more worthwhile of being framed in a human body. There's a factor there's such thing as discomfort. If we can discover some contrarian joy, even in the horrible parts of life, we're victors of some sort. We have actually type of won.Q: When you're making an album, do you fret:" I cannot put a sad tune on there, that's not my brand name. Individuals anticipate me to embrace positivity "? A: Sad sensations can be some of the most effective feelings of all. My mind might state," Oh, this might be an unfortunate song, somebody might not like this,"however that much deeper intuition may inform me exactly what to do.Q: A great deal of individuals have actually referred to you as the rock 'n' roll Tony Robbins. Right weird? Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and go, how did I get this career?A: Yeah, nobody is more stunned than I am. I never thought of doing this. I never desired to be a singer.

I transferred to New york city to be a style designer. I operated at a progressive clothes company, Comme des Garcons. I wrote them a letter at 15, asking if I could work for them-- that's why I moved to New York.

It all fell apart very quickly, and all my dreams fell away, and exactly what was left was a more subtle yet more concentrated vision that I began to be shown, and I started to make it real.Q:

How is the Inspirational You various from the Real You? When you go out with your buddies and you're just hanging out, are you inspiring? And are they like," Stop doing that"? A: You'll have to ask. I indicate, who knows? It's probably irritating.Allison Stewart is a freelance writer.onthetown@chicagotribune.com!.?.!Twitter @chitribent When: 8 p.m. Saturday Where: The Vic Theatre, 3145 N. Sheffield Ave.Tickets:$25 (18 +); 773-472-0449 or www.Ticketfly.com

9d223d932eb01cbed0aa445cf7f2d94d >

"Latest motion picture reviews "title="Latest motion picture evaluations"src=http://www.trbimg.com/img-5aecaf63/turbine/chi-movie-reviews-pictures-pg > Have a look at the most recent motion picture evaluations from Michael Phillips and the Chicago Tribune.

Have a look at reviews for all new music releases from Tribune music critic Greg Kot.

[cavghtup]

Meet ROSELINE WYNTERS; a SEVENTEEN year old who resembles PERRIE EDWARDS. She hails from ARENDELLEand lived with her parent, QUEEN ELSA. Unfortunately, she is UNPLAYABLE.

“’Cause I’ll know my weakness, know my voice; And I’ll believe in grace and choice; And I know perhaps my heart is farce; But I’ll be born without a mask.”

Some describe her as —

+ hard working, nonjudgemental, outspoken

- self confident, contrarian, hot-tempered

Her story goes like this —

While her mother is ice, her daughter is fire. The two are polar opposites from each other, which of course created a strained relationship for the two. Growing up, she was never one to fit into the societal norms of her royal conformities. She was the one who came in slobbing with dirt caked on her legs ten minutes late, claiming she was off collecting bugs from her frog zoo she had in the backyard. Her mother would always disapprove, which always fueled her frustration. Like every child, she always craved her mother approval and when she never got it, she became extremely frustrated. Everything she did always seemed too little for her.

One day out of frustration and anger, she left. She grabbed her horse, her things, and went off to the faraway lands she had only dreamed of. She didn’t last long before she was found, but those four days of freedom she experienced was the best experience of her life. She met people she only read about in storybooks, and created friendships she’d never have because of her status.  Being scolded for running away never stopped her from leaving again, she started taking week long trips on her own, learning to fly under the radar. She’d worry the kingdom for weeks at a time, but she always came back. Afraid of what would happen if she kept leaving any longer, Elsa decided to send her to WDA with her cousins in order to try to tame her wild soul. Of course, Roseline disapproved and threw a fit, but after a couple weeks at the academy, things started to look up. She was given more freedom than she had before, and she could explore everything she wants. She tries to busy herself with all the activities on campus and has made it her goal to know everyone on campus. Maybe she can recruit some of her new friends to go on her new adventures. After all, no one can tame this free soul.

Be careful around her, her power is —

ICE/WATER MANIPULATION→ It might of been obvious that Roseline inherited her mother’s ice powers. She learned very young of her extraordinary gift, but unlike Elsa, she learned to control it. As she grew up, her gift only became more powerful. She was able to do amazing things with just a flick of her finger. Afraid that she’ll one day create an ice storm, she tries to keep her powers at a minimum. She cares too much about her new friends and the people around her to cause them any harm, but not enough to isolate herself from society.

You could see her around with —

THE BJORGMAN’S → What has happened to their happy family? No one knows, not even these three. As children they had no problems with each other, but as time passed, they have began to distance themselves from each other without treason. Now that all three of them attend the same school, it’s hard to miss each other’s glances in the hallway. Roseline’s relationship with both boys is okay, but from a distance you wouldn’t think they’re even related. They’re trying though, but how can you fix something when you can’t find the missing pieces?

CASSIDY SNOWE → Much like her relationship with her cousins, Rose’s relationship with Cassidy is nearly nonexistent. Despite what others may think, Roseline appreciates the fact that Cassidy makes an effort to become better friends, but hardly shows it. She does love Cassidy like a sister, and loves her company more than anything.

OWEN MADAGAN → Owen and Roseline met through book club, and he is certainly one of the few friends she has bothered to make. She definitely loves his book recommendations, finding them to be just as imaginative as she likes. She tries to return the favor, though believes that none of her suggestions are nearly as good as his. She isn’t afraid to open up to him, and hopes that he feels the same.

VITANI IWEALA → Vitani and Roseline are also friends—surprisingly. They’re both detached from their families; and found a family member in each other. It’s like they’re attached at the hip, and others don’t understand it. They have their own little jokes here and there, and often take the time to make sure the other is okay all the time—much like family would.