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lowkeyren · 6 months ago

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reverse dating tropes w hsr men! (pt. 2)

in which — what the title suggests / those classic fanfic tropes but with a twist

featuring — gepard, aventurine, sunday (separately) x gn!reader

✧.* — wc: total 2.1k, downbad gepard + flirty aven + sunday is js fluff overload, wrecked my brain out for this, serval robin cameo xx, anyway pls enjoy!! reblogs r appreciated <3

boothill jing yuan blade vers here!

gepard ♡‧₊˚

"blind date" but gepard is just too shy to ask you out himself so serval does him a favour —setting you up on a date with him.

gepard clutches the bouquet of ball peonies tightly behind his back; he catches sight of you sitting on a bench, patiently waiting for him. to ease his nerves, he takes a deep breath, reassuring himself, it’s going to be alright gepard, just go over there, give them the flowers, and ask them out! surely it’s not that hard…

upon spotting him, you rise from your seat and wave eagerly in his direction. he hastens his steps, closing the distance between you. as he stands in front of you, you can see a faint blush tinting his cheeks, the rosy hue contrasting with his fair skin. he clears his throat, “ahem…sorry to keep you waiting.” revealing the bouquet behind his back, he averts his gaze downwards, shifting his weight nervously from one foot to the other.

you accept the flowers graciously, smiling warmly at him. “and would you please—” in that moment, his gaze flickers up to meet yours, it's the worst thing he could have done.

oh aeons… you look so beautiful. his heart races, threatening to leap out of his chest, and he finds himself at a loss for words, his mind a jumble of thoughts and emotions. “hm?” you tilt your head with a soft smile, the sound of your voice washes over him like a gentle breeze, leaving him tongue-tied. he’s sure you can see the redness spreading to his ears now.

panicking, he blurts out “—pass the flowers to my sister.” (re: go on a date with me)

his eyes widened at his own words, wait no he meant to ask you out on a date!

“ah… okay, no problem!” you reply, masking your surprise with a polite smile, quickly dismissing any lingering curiosity. though you do find it a bit odd that he would arrange a meeting just to pass on flowers to his sister, but hey perhaps as the captain of silvermane guards, he's simply too busy to visit serval himself. in any case, you admire his thoughtfulness towards his sibling.

“now tell me brother dearest, to what do i owe the pleasure of receiving ball peonies from you?” serval crosses her arm across her chest, learning against her workbench, her face deadpan, oh she’s definitely aware of what happened.

sensing her brother’s nervousness, she shakes her head teasingly. "oh, nevermind! please, spare me the explanation… you totally fumbled, and told them to give the flowers to me? really, geppie? and how long do you plan to drag this out for?"

gepard sighs as he realises there's no use in trying to deflect her sharp observation. he can only resort to his last-ditch effort now: asking serval to set you up on a date with him.

so now, you find yourself sitting at a cozy diner, waiting for your so-called “blind date” that serval has set you up on.

(“i guarantee you won’t regret it!” serval throws a playful wink at you; you give up trying to figure her underlying intentions)

suddenly, a man walks over to you, you assume that he is your date— “gepard? what are you doing here..?” gepard's cheeks flush with embarrassment as he stands before you, a sheepish smile playing at the corners of his lips. "i, uh... i’m your blind date." he admits, swallowing nervously.

you let out a soft laugh, “oh i was hoping it would be you.” you admit, your voice tinged with a hint of bashfulness.

hoping it was him? so that means you feel the same right?

needless to say, your date went well. before you part ways, you press a soft kiss to his already-burning cheeks (don’t do that again, you’re gonna break him), and you disappear into the distance, leaving behind a trail of butterflies in his stomach; he presses his hand against the spot you pecked, he thinks he might not be able to sleep for the next few nights, what you have done to the poor guy.

oh gepard, he is so deeply, utterly, in love with you.

aventurine ୨୧｡˚ ⋆

CEO playboy aventurine takes an interest in you, but you unintentionally lead him on, so he ends up falling heads over heels for you.

“meet me in my office in 5 minutes.” you immediately pause at what you’re doing, and read the message from your boss over and over again. oh gosh you’re really done for now! what did you do wrong?! your mind races as you try to recall any mistakes you’ve made recently, but nothing comes to mind…

you nervously knock on the door to aventurine’s office, feeling your palms grow clammy with sweat. a voice rings out, “ah, yes please come in.”

you step into the room, not daring to meet your boss’ gaze. “i’m here sir, as you requested. is there anything you need from me?” you suddenly find the marble floor very interesting, opting to stare at it as you anxiously wait for his reply.

aww, are they really that shy to see me? that’s cute.

aventurine’s next sentence catches you completely off guard, “so, what do you think about my new tie, hm?” he walks over to you, a smirk forming on his lips.

is this one of his stupid schemes again? aeons, this won’t work on you.

“...it's crooked. let me fix it for you.” you reach out and adjust his tie, being careful as to not accidentally choke him (even if you really want to, just because he scared the shit out of you by calling you into his office for something like this), lest you get fired.

aventurine is pleasantly taken aback by your boldness. usually those who fall victim to his flirtatious ways are quick to shower him with compliments, but your reaction is refreshingly unexpected. or perhaps you are challenging him? oh well, a little gamble never hurts, right?

it's obvious he’s taken a liking to you; for the next few weeks, he's been calling you to his office more and more frequently, to the point where you're no longer nervous to enter, as you know it’s probably nothing serious. plus, you’ve gotten used to the “strange” reasons he requests for your presence.

including the times where he made you do your work in his office, claiming that he feels lonely and needs your (it can only be you, no one else) company. or the many-times that you told him to manage his money wisely because he CANNOT be spending thousands on you.

“just a small gift for my favourite employee!” (and it's a whole ass car that costs way above your pay grade)

at this point, you're beginning to think he should hire a secretary. you subconsciously bring the idea up during one of your visits, what you didn’t expect was for him to eagerly agree with you. his eyes twinkle with amusement, “no wonder you’re my favourite, of course you’re interested in being my secretary, well lucky you! your new position begins tomorrow.”

so instead of hiring a secretary like any normal person would, he makes YOU his secretary. and hey, when did you ever express that you would like to be his secretary? this scumbag…

“oh don’t be so nervous sweetheart, just sort these out for me—” he hands you a folder of documents, his fingers deliberately brushing against yours, lingering for a moment longer than necessary. “and stay here while you work on them.. want to see your pretty face.”

you think your boss is insufferable, even more so now that you’ve fallen for his charms. it's as if he enjoys playing this game of cat and mouse, keeping you on your toes with his teasing remarks and lingering touches. yet beneath the facade of annoyance, there’s something undeniably alluring about the way he looks at you, as if you're the only person in the room. well you’re not far off; you are the sole focus of his attention.

like right now, while you attempt to maintain your composure under his unmistakably, shameless, lovesick gaze; his lips curl into a mischievous smirk, “oh by the way, dinner's on me tonight. choose whatever you like." with a coy smile, you decide to tease him, “what? can’t even ask me out properly?” you quip, raising an eyebrow in faux innocence.

and later that night you find your boss on one knee, waiting at your front porch, in his hands are freshly bought flowers. his eyes immediately light up the moment you open the door, a horrified look on your face. “will you go on a date with me?” oh how he delights in your flustered expression.

“i said ask me out! not get down on one knee and propose!”

“...so will you?”

don’t worry, he knows you'll look forward to the day he proposes (you’re not even dating, yet) but for now he’ll spoil you with the most lavish meal known to mankind, not that you’re complaining about it either.

sunday ༊*·˚

not-so-accidental confession with sunday who intentionally leads you to overhear him talking about his feelings for you.

you raise your hand, ready to knock on the door, but a voice from inside halts your movement. you hesitate, your knuckles hovering just inches away from the wood, as the unexpected sound piques your curiosity.

“brother, why didn’t you tell me this before?” it’s no doubt that the soft-spoken voice belongs to robin, her tone carrying a tinge of surprise; and by the way she addresses the other person, it can't be anyone but sunday himself.

their conversation sounds tense, you think it's inappropriate to eavesdrop, but just as you were about to leave, sunday's voice catches your attention, and you freeze at the sound of your name slipping past his lips.

“—their infectious laugh, how their eyes light up with pure innocence, their unwavering passion and selflessness that knows no bounds; always putting others before themselves. how can i possibly not love them?”

your face flushes with warmth upon hearing his words, and you're unable to suppress a cough that escapes; you bring your hands to your mouth, hoping to stifle any further embarrassment.

robin chuckles, “oh brother, i understand exactly what you mean”, a genuine smile spreads across her face. “...seems like you’re expecting a guest” she raises an eyebrow knowingly, “i’ll take my leave now." with that, she gives sunday a reassuring pat on the shoulder and gracefully exits the room, shooting you a playful wink as she walks by.

uh oh… you’re totally busted

you immediately turn on your heels, trying to slip away before sunday realises you're there. but just before you can make your escape, someone grabs your wrist, holding you firmly in place. you turn around to see sunday looking down at you, his eyes flickering with emotions swirling within him.

"i swear i didn't hear anything!" you exclaim, waving your hand in front of you defensively.

“really…nothing?”

“yup! nothing at all.” you lie through your teeth, cringing at yourself.

“nothing? ...but i made sure you were there to hear everything.” a hint of disappointment evident in his voice.

“huh..?” your expression twists with confusion, a faint blush creeping up from your neck. you were meant to hear that? he just poured his heart out to his sister…about you!

sunday smiles, oh there’s no point in lying now, he knows you heard him. (as expected)

he steps closer to you, his arms caging you between the wall and himself. “you know i meant everything i said right?” a soft smile tugged at the corners of his lips, leaving you momentarily speechless, unsure of how to respond; you can feel your chest swelling with warmth, his wings flutter subconsciously as he awaits your response.

“y-yes…” you avert your gaze, too shy to stare into his eyes. “please, look at me…” he gently tilts your chin up, his eyes boring into yours. “i wanted to tell you that i love you, for so long” he looks vulnerable at that moment, a side he only ever shows to you; a side of him only you get to see.

“i love y—” sunday gently places his finger on your lips, silencing you. you tilt your head at his gesture, your mouth still agape. “don’t say it back yet…” moving his hand to hold your face, “allow me to take you out on a date, then tell me how you feel.” you interlace your fingers with the his that rest against your face, nodding your head in acceptance.

though sunday longs for you to utter those 3 words to him, he wants to make that moment perfect, just as you are to him. despite sunday’s intention for you to overhear him, he regrets not being able to catch your reaction to his words, so next time (re: on the date), he vows to repeat it as many times as necessary; he will do anything to fulfill your every wish.

and should you desire for him to put a ring on your finger, he will do it in a heartbeat.

✧.*

masterlist boothill jing yuan blade vers here!

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punkshort · 3 months ago

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First Impressions

Thanks anon for this request!

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader one-shot

Summary: When your heater breaks in the dead of winter, you get more than you bargained for when Joel Miller arrives to fix it.

Warnings: language, some fluff, the stress and fear that comes with living in the wilderness during a zombie apocalypse, competency kink (a little), smut (18+ MDNI), dirty talk

WC: 4.2K

Adjusting to life in Jackson was tough. You had been on your own for so long, you found it nearly impossible to ever fully relax. You were grateful Tommy and Maria took you in after one of their patrols stumbled across you freezing in the thick Wyoming wilderness, but to be yanked from the brink of death and dropped into some thriving community that seemingly even managed to still celebrate the holidays was too jarring.

So, you kept to yourself for a while. You pitched in around the stables. It was where you felt most comfortable: less people, more animals. You didn't go to the dining hall to eat and you didn't visit the bar for a drink. You had a clear cut path from your house to the stables and back, and you rarely ever strayed.

Unfortunately, while Jackson had a lot to offer and did incredibly well at reviving civilization, things still did break. Like your space heater.

You piled on extra blankets for a week, and then you moved to the living room to sleep on the tiny sofa in front of the fireplace, but eventually your back was screaming at you for it and the cold weather wouldn't let up for at least another two months, so you had no choice but to ask for help.

Tommy was shocked you hadn't said something sooner and apologized for making you feel like you couldn't ask for help, even though it wasn't at all his fault or anyone else's except your own, and promised to have his brother stop by that afternoon to take a look at it.

While you kept to yourself and hardly socialized at all, that didn't stop you from overhearing things at the stables. You knew of Tommy's brother. How people whispered rumors behind his back and fell silent whenever he stepped foot inside the building.

Did you know he slit a raider's throat and made the guy's girlfriend watch?

He beat the shit out of Seth the other night just for looking at him wrong.

Back in Boston, I heard he knocked some guy's teeth down his throat for taking the last of the beef jerky.

Someone told me he only sleeps two hours a night.

He fixed Greg's shower and told him not to fuck it up again or else he'll be taking baths in the kitchen sink.

Were you intimidated? Maybe a little. But you had been on your own for so long, fighting and scratching and clawing to stay alive. Some asshole wasn't going to shake you up.

Then you saw him.

Well, you'd seen him before, sure. But just glimpses in the barn or passing by him on the street. Never up close.

When you opened your front door later that afternoon, you were a little taken aback. He was so much more handsome than you had thought. He was built like a refrigerator; broad and strong. His cheeks and chin were dusted in a patchy, greying beard, growing right below a hooked nose and deep, velvety brown eyes. There were a few scars littering his bronzed skin but what drew your attention more was his hair. His fucking hair. Loose, mostly grey curls that fell past his ear and down the back of his neck. Not long enough to pull into a ponytail, like Tommy, but give it a few more months and he might. He had them pushed back from his face, making the silken locks look like a cascading river so enticing, you had to hold yourself back from touching them.

He said your name and readjusted the toolbox in his hand and you blinked yourself back to life before stepping aside to let him in. When he passed you, you were hit with the strong scent of wood shavings and coffee, an intoxicating combination that had your brain buffering once again.

"Tommy said you needed your heater looked at?"

You nodded and pointed up the stairs. "It's in my bedroom. Can I, uh, get you something to drink? Coffee?"

He perked up at that once he slid off his jacket and shoes. "You got coffee?"

You nodded and walked toward the kitchen, rummaging through your meager belongings until you found the precious tin can. "That's the one thing I always made sure I grabbed if I ever saw it out there. If we have to live like this, at least I'm still having my coffee."

Joel grinned and set the toolbox down on your counter, watching as you filled up a kettle with water. His heart was hammering wildly in his chest. He couldn't believe how lucky he was that your stupid heater broke, giving him the perfect excuse to finally meet you so he could stop pining from afar. "You don't like it much here, then?"

You startled at that, giving him a look of surprise before lighting your stove.

"No, I didn't mean here, I just meant... you know... the world in general."

"I know, I'm just teasin' you," he said a little awkwardly with a soft chuckle. You turned around, leaning against your counter and crossing your arms over your chest. You had just spoken a few words but so far, nothing about this man screamed scary. In fact, he seemed rather... sweet.

"How long have you been here?" you asked while you waited for the water to boil.

"'Bout five years," he said thoughtfully, scratching his chin. "You're new, though."

You nodded, your fingers fidgeting underneath your bicep. "Yeah. I think it's been almost a month. I'm not really sure, never bothered keeping track of the days out there."

Joel studied you up for a moment, picking up on your eyes shifting over your surroundings, your foot tapping anxiously on the floor, and the way you kept your back protected when you spoke to him.

"I remember when we first got here," Joel said. Your fidgeting paused and you looked at him again. "It was tough. Acclimatin' to this kind of life. Hard to sleep. Hard to trust anyone. It took time but eventually, you start sleepin' soundly again and that guard comes down. You'll see."

A slow smile spread across your face and you looked down shyly at your feet. "Am I that obvious?"

Joel laughed and strolled over to the two mugs and can of instant coffee you had sitting out. "Wouldn't say it's obvious but I haven't seen you at the dining hall one time. In fact, pretty sure this is the first time I've heard your voice." Your cheeks warmed up behind his back and you bit your lower lip. So he's noticed you enough to realize you never went to the dining hall.

"It's a pretty one," he said over his shoulder, focusing on scooping the correct amount of coffee into each mug. "Your voice, I mean. Shame you been keepin' it hidden all this time."

"O-oh," you stuttered, completely flustered by his compliments. This was not at all the man everyone made him out to be. "Thank you."

Joel carefully poured the boiling water into each mug before giving them each a stir, then handed you one. "You're welcome, darlin'. Now why don't you show me to your bedroom?"

Your eyes must have bugged out of your head because at first, he frowned, then after he realized what he said, turned a shade of pink you didn't know he was capable of.

"I mean, for the heater."

"Yeah, oh Christ, I know," you said, waving him off and heading for the stairs, your mug clutched so tightly in one hand you thought it might break. You lead Joel to the first door on the left and stepped back so he had room to swing his toolbox through the narrow door with him.

"I don't know what happened," you said, trailing in after him while he began to set out some tools on the ground. When he knelt down, he groaned at the creak in his knees and you quickly grabbed a spare pillow. "Here, kneel on this," you offered. He looked up at the pillow, then at you, and shook his head.

"I ain't kneelin' on your pillow."

"It's a spare. I only use the one. And honestly, even that seems too much sometimes."

He sighed and hesitated for only a moment longer before taking the pillow from your hand. "Thank you," he said softly. You smiled and sat down on the edge of your bed after putting your coffee on the end table with his.

"Anyway. As I was saying, I don't know what happened. It was working fine and then one day it just wouldn't turn on. I tried other outlets and I didn't see any issues with the cord, so I just gave up."

Joel began to unscrew the back of the heater while he listened. "So you gave up and slept in the cold for two weeks?"

"Nothing I wasn't used to."

He couldn't argue with that.

The two of you sat in a comfortable silence while he worked until he began to hum some old country song under his breath, making you smile again. You couldn't remember the last time you smiled so much.

"What're you smilin' for?" he asked with a sparkle of amusement in his eyes.

"You aren't at all the way people say you are," you said boldly.

He quirked an eyebrow and turned his attention back to his work. "And what have you heard?"

You shrugged and leaned back on your hands. "Threatened a man after breaking his shower. Knocked out some guy named Seth. That you only sleep two hours a night," you chuckled at the last one when you heard how silly it sounded.

"Well," Joel said with a heavy sigh. "I didn't threaten anyone about their shower. Just reminded him he's gotta take care of the pipes or else the whole place'll rot."

You grinned to yourself as he continued to explain the rumors.

"I did punch Seth but he said somethin' real nasty 'bout my girl and, well, that just don't sit right with me."

Your grin slid right off your face. "Your girl?"

He stopped what he was doing and swiveled around to face you. "My - Ellie. Her name's Ellie. She's, uh, well... she ain't my daughter, but..."

Relief flooded your veins. "Oh. I thought you meant -"

"No, no," Joel said, clearing his throat awkwardly. "No, not like that." He twirled a wrench around in between his fingers as he nervously bit the inside of his cheek before adding, "Don't got anyone like that."

Your mouth formed a silent oh. Message received.

Joel cleared his throat again and turned back to the heater. "And the sleep thing, well, they got me there," he chuckled with a shake of his head. "Although some nights are better than others."

"I know what you mean," you said with a nod. After a moment of silence, Joel smiled to himself.

"Imagine y'do if you ain't got any heat at night."

You giggled and he smiled again, this time his chest swelling when he heard you laugh.

Joel continued to work on the heater while you studied him quietly. He took you by complete surprise. The last thing you expected was to make a friend out of the fearsome Joel Miller. It didn't hurt that he was so easy on the eyes, either. How old was he? Your gaze roamed over his greying hair and the crinkles next to his eyes. Older than you, definitely, but it was hard to tell by how much.

You couldn't even remember the last time you were interested in anyone. It must have been when you were in the Atlanta QZ, and that was years ago.

"Alright, let's give her a run," Joel suddenly said. When you refocused on him, you saw he had put the heater back together and was fixing it upright. He plugged it into the wall and hovered his finger over the power button before glancing back at you. "Ready?"

You nodded and swung your legs back and forth over the edge of your bed, then he winked at you, sending warmth all over your body. Jesus, if Joel kept giving you little looks like that, you wouldn't have much need for a heater anymore.

He pressed the button and sure enough, the coils inside the heater began to glow orange and heat started to fill the room.

"Oh!" you exclaimed, jumping off the bed in excitement. "Thank you!" you added, kneeling on the floor as well so you could warm your hands in front of the heater.

"Anytime," Joel murmured, and it wasn't until you heard the deep timber of his voice next to you that you realized he was so close. You tilted your face, smiling shyly at him next to you. Up close, you could see the fine lines in his face in much more detail, each one calling out to you to trace with your fingertip. When you met his gaze, you found he had been examining you, as well. Quickly, you looked away and stood up.

"Is there anythin' else?" Joel asked as he began to pack up his toolbox. You shook your head.

"No, I think that'll do it."

"You sure? Thought I saw that faucet drippin' in the kitchen."

You frowned. "No, I didn't notice that," you said slowly.

"What 'bout those windows?" he asked, standing up with a grunt and gesturing to the two bedroom windows on the other side of the room. "Need help hangin' curtains?"

You looked where he was pointing. "No, never really bothered me. Besides, it faces the backyard. No one can see in."

He laughed softly and rubbed his chin before shooting you a sheepish look. "I'm tryin' to find a reason to stay, sweetheart."

Your eyes widened and once again, you felt your cheeks heat up.

"Oh," you said, shyly dropping your gaze to the floor to hide your smile. "I would like that."

"Yeah?" he asked, and you nodded.

"Yeah. You're, um," you shifted your weight nervously, "you're sweet. And nice."

Joel huffed and set his toolbox back down. "I ain't nice all the time," he warned. "But you ain't gotta worry 'bout that."

"No?" you questioned, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as he began to close the distance between you.

He sighed and cupped your face with both hands. Your body instantly melted at his touch, your knees practically giving out when he dragged his thumb across your lip, saving it from your teeth. "Am I readin' this wrong?" he asked, his eyes darting all over your face. You quickly shook your head and stepped even closer.

"Thank Christ," he breathed before capturing your lips in a deep kiss. It had been several years and you were a little rusty, but you quickly found it was like riding a bike.

Joel's kiss lit a fire in you, one that had gone dormant for so long. Your fingers curled around the lapels of his flannel, the material warm and soft, just like him, and with the confidence boost that came from his hands dropping to grab excitedly at your hips, you walked him backwards until he bumped against the edge of your mattress.

He sat down on your bed with an oomph and you crawled into his lap, not once breaking the kiss.

"Wish I got to know you sooner," he whispered, tipping his head back when your lips traveled down his neck. Fuck, even his neck was sexy. "Always so skittish and shy," he continued, his palms gliding up and down your back.

You laughed softly against his skin and leaned back. "You still don't really know me."

He grinned and shrugged. "I'd like to, if you're willin'," he said, his vulnerability making your chest ache. You sunk your teeth into your lower lip again and nodded.

"Good," he said, his hands roaming further past your waist to cup your ass. "'Cause I like what I know so far."

"You're full of surprises," you told him, giggling when he gave your ass a firm squeeze. "You're so much more... you're more gentle and sweet than I expected."

Joel smirked and tugged you closer so you felt his erection trapped within his jeans. "I can be gentle," he told you, nipping at your jaw. "Or I can be rough. Whatever you like."

You swallowed when you caught the mischievous glint in his dark eyes. "Oh, yeah?"

"Mhmm," he said, and before you could blink he had spun you around so your back was pressed into the mattress while he hovered above you. You had to admit, he was adorable. He had to be pushing sixty but he was talking like a man half his age. After you heard the way his knees creaked when he was fixing your heater, you figured he was all talk, or maybe he just needed the ego boost to hype himself up.

But the speed in which he removed your clothes should have been the first sign that your impression of him was wrong. When he buried himself inside you, his surprisingly thick length stretching you open and nudging the furthest depths of you, you got the message.

When you gasped and tipped your head back, his big hand immediately rose to cup the side of your face and tilt it back down so he could watch your face as you unraveled beneath him. Each little noise and moan seemed to egg him on, like he fed off your sounds and the way your face twisted in pleasure when his coarse hair rubbed against your clit with each roll of his hips.

"Wanna see you," he explained, eyes scanning all over your face. "Wanna watch you take it. You'll keep your eyes on me, won't you? Hm? You'll be good for me, yeah?"

You nodded, your mind a muddled mess. The only thing you could seem to focus on was the slow and deliberate drag of his heavy cock in and out of you. Joel pressed your knees back against your chest as far as you could handle and pushed inside you further with a rough grunt. He managed to get so deep you swore you could feel him in your stomach and the sensation left you breathless.

"So fuckin' pretty, y'know that?" he groaned, gazing down at you without breaking rhythm. His long locks loosened and hung past his eyes, tempting you to smooth them back. "Wanted to get to know you f'so long but I couldn't ever catch your eye," he admitted with a little smirk. You moaned when his hips began to swirl, switching the angle ever so slightly and setting your nerves alight.

"I-I... oh, god," you whined, already struggling to keep your eyes on him like he asked. "I didn't know."

He lunged forward and crashed his mouth against yours hungrily, his exhale fanning over your cheek. Then just as suddenly as he kissed you, he leaned back and pulled out.

"Turn over," he instructed, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he dragged in air. You did as you were told and shakily held yourself up on your hands and knees.

"Fuck," he muttered behind you. Your face went hot and you tucked your chin into your shoulder as you waited for him to enter you again, but he chose to take an extra minute to glide his hand over the curves of your hips and ass. If you had been able to see him, you would have seen a look of awe and appreciation on his face.

"Always wondered what you had hidden under all those clothes," he said as he lined himself up at your entrance. You cried out his name when he finally slid back inside, the angle already too intense and he hadn't even begun to move. "Goddamn, wanna run my tongue over every fuckin' inch of you, baby," he growled, fingers gripping your sides as he tried to ground himself.

He gave you a few gentle thrusts to get used to it before he couldn't hold back any longer. He pounded into you, his eyes fixed on your ass and the way it bounced with every snap of his hips. One hand slowly reached down to trace your spine, marveling at the way your body welcomed him. Then you arched your back and you both moaned at the slight change and he could feel his stomach begin to tense in anticipation of his release.

"So fuckin' tight," he said through clenched teeth. You could hear him breathing heavily as his thrusts grew sloppy and you began to panic, sensing he was about to come before you were ready. But then as if he read your mind, one of his hands snaked around your front to draw fast circles over your clit.

"C'mon, give it t'me," he said with a grunt. "Wanna feel this perfect pussy squeeze me, want you to be feelin' me for fuckin' days, sweetheart."

"Oh, shit," you gasped, mouth hanging open in a mixture of ecstasy and surprise. You wondered how on earth everyone in town had so much to say about Joel's reputation but somehow managed to leave out how mind-blowing he happened to be in bed.

"Christ, honey. Ain't gonna last much longer," he groaned, his fingers working even faster between your legs. He pounded into you harder, punching the air from your lungs and pushing you closer and closer to your peak. Your breaths were coming in shallow pants and you could feel the swell building deep inside you, threatening to unleash at any second. You reached behind you frantically, searching for some part of him to hold onto when you found his hand pressed firmly onto your hip. Your fingers clasped over his as you felt the pressure build up quickly and you knew in that moment this one encounter was going to single-handedly ruin you.

The moment you fell apart while practically screaming his name, your cunt pulsing around him and your body shaking, he almost made a huge mistake. Finally getting to witness what you looked like when you came was more than enough, but hearing his name over and over while your body shook with pleasure? It was too much and he was only just a man who was holding on by his goddamn fingernails as it was. But fortunately, he managed to pull out just in time to paint your lower back with his cum. He knew he was making some ungodly sounds as relief flooded his veins, but he couldn't bring himself to care. He had been daydreaming about taking you apart like that for weeks and now that he finally had you, there was no turning back.

"Oh, fuck," he gasped, lifting his chin towards the ceiling while dragging in deep lungfuls of air. You collapsed flat onto your stomach with a grunt and he tilted his face back down to grin as how spent you looked.

Still got it.

"I'll be right back, darlin'," he told you. You mumbled something tiredly in response before he slipped out of your room to get a washcloth from your bathroom and returned quickly to clean you up.

"Thank you," you said, turning your face so you could watch him gently wipe up his mess. His eyes flickered to yours and he smirked.

"You thankin' me for fixin' the heater, for fuckin' you, or for cleanin' you up?"

You giggled, your voice a little hoarse when you replied, "All of the above."

You flipped over onto your back and his eyes immediately drifted down your naked body, his breath catching in the back of his throat at how perfect you were. Even better than he ever imagined.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered, letting the rag fall to the floor so he could glide his hand up your thigh, over your hips and stomach to one of your breasts which, he realized far too late, had gone neglected. Next time.

"So are you," you whispered back, bringing a hand up to play with the long curls resting on the back of his neck. He shook his head shyly and looked away.

"I need a haircut."

"I like it just the way it is," you told him, twisting a lock of hair around one finger and watching as it loosely bounced back when you let it go. "Gives me something to grab onto," you joked. A wide smile stretched across his face and his eyes looked like he was staring at the tree on Christmas morning.

"So, uh," Joel began when the silence stretched on for too long. "I meant it earlier. 'Bout gettin' to know you better." He couldn't remember the last time he felt so nervous. He could feel his face heating up and he prayed you didn't notice. "I know you don't like goin' to the dining hall but I'd really like to have dinner with you. I can't make much but I can make stew, if y'wanna-"

"I would go to the dining hall with you," you said, cutting him off. His eyes snapped back up to yours and he shot you a nervous smile.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you said with a little shrug before sitting up and draping your arms around his shoulders. "As long as you're there, I'll go."

He grinned and leaned forward to kiss you, still in complete disbelief his wildest fantasy actually came true.

"How 'bout tomorrow, then?" he asked a little breathlessly when he broke the kiss.

Your eyes lit up and you nodded. "It's a date."

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gilbertscurls · 3 months ago

Text

Down Bad ➵ Matt Sturniolo

warnings: angst, mentions of depression, panic attack, suggestive, 12k words

Matt had no idea how he got there, how he found himself sitting in the living room, and Y/N, his ex-girlfriend cuddled up on the opposite couch with her new partner. He felt like it was some cruel joke when he came to visit Madison, his good friend, and he suddenly was met with the girl he was so in love with sitting there. And someone else had his arm wrapped around her.

When he walked in, and Madison came to greet him, his gaze immediately landed on you and… Vinnie Hacker. Matt didn’t think he’d ever felt such a painful pang in his chest before. He must have looked like he’d just been stabbed as he stood there staring at you. His jaw went slack and his heart dropped, and for a second, he couldn’t even believe what he was seeing. Vinnie had an arm wrapped around you, and you were leaning against him with a smile.

He was standing there watching someone else touch you like it was no big deal, and he thought he might throw up. He suddenly felt like he’d been punched in the chest, and he could barely even breathe. Nick and Chris were behind him, and he was painfully aware that they were watching his reaction to his.

Finally, you stood up to hug his brothers hello, before you found yourself right in front of him. “Matt.” You nodded, not sure how to greet him.

He froze for a second.

She said my name, he thought.

You’d just said his name in that same sweet, soft voice, and he suddenly forgot how to talk.

You were standing right in front of him, only inches away.

“Hey,” he managed to answer weakly.

He desperately wanted to touch you, to grab you and pull you against him and hold you like he’d done dozens of times before…

“You, uh…”

His eyes were still fixated on Vinnie, who was just behind you the whole time.

“You look good,” he told you lamely.

You nodded. “Thanks. You too.”

He could tell you were a little uncomfortable, and it killed him. He wished you were wearing anything other than the skintight, low-cut dress you had on now. It looked amazing, but he could remember all the times you’d worn that around him, and seeing you in it now was driving him crazy.

He was still staring at Vinnie, fighting the urge to punch him in the face.

“Hey, man.” Vinnie reached to shake his hand, standing by your side.

Matt wanted to snap Vinnie’s wrist, but instead, he forced a smile as he shook his hand.

“Hey,” he replied.

His eyes darted between Vinnie and you, watching the way Vinnie put his arm back around you, and he felt like he was going to explode.

“Um…” you mumbled awkwardly. “Vinnie, this is Matt, my… My ex. Matt, this is Vinnie, my, um… Vinnie.”

Matt didn’t miss the way your voice caught on the words “my ex”.

He heard the awkward pause.

He heard you call Vinnie your Vinnie.

And he wanted to rip Vinnie’s other arm off when Vinnie pulled you against him as you talked.

Matt clenched his jaw and forced a smile, but he wanted to smash Vinnie’s face.

Nick and Chris were just watching this entire exchange from behind him, and Matt did not want to know what they were thinking right now. He was doing everything he could to make a polite conversation with a massive knot in his chest.

He was forcing himself to look at Vinnie’s face and ignore the fact that Vinnie was holding you against his chest, and he was trying to think of something to say.

He was feeling even more sick to his stomach.

You were so close to him that he could smell your perfume, and he could remember the way you’d smelled every time he’d buried his face in your neck and inhaled your sweet scent.

He could see the smooth, milky white skin of your neck and shoulders just a few inches from him, and he remembered how it tasted and how it smelled the first time he’d kissed it.

But then, hiding right in the corner of your cleavage, something piqued his attention.

You had a hickey on your neck.

The second he saw it, he felt like he’d been stabbed in the chest.

He was frozen in shock for a second.

Someone else had marked you.

He felt a rush of jealousy and rage and heartache and possessiveness all at once, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe.

Vinnie was right there, holding you against him and holding you close, and Matt knew exactly how that hickey had gotten there…

Matt swallowed hard as he stared at it, and he felt the jealousy, anger, and hurt rush through him all over again.

You were his. You’d belonged to him, and someone else had marked you.

He stared at the hickey and wondered exactly how many times he’d done the same thing to your neck.

He tried to count, remembering the times he’d left love bites on your beautiful skin.

You’d always worn them proudly for the next couple of days, and he’d always liked reminding you that you were his.

He could almost hear his voice in his head again, whispering to you that you belonged to him every time he’d pressed his lips to your skin.

He’d tell you how beautiful you were while he left little love bites on your collarbones, and he’d always loved the way he knew they were still there the next day.

And now, as he stood right beside you, someone else had left a hickey on the same spot he’d claimed as his.

He’d marked you as his dozens of times over the past months, and now you were wearing someone else’s marks on your gorgeous neck…

Finally, Vinnie took you back to the couch, sitting so close to you. And Matt almost lost his mind.

He sat right beside you again, and Matt’s hands reflexively clenched into fists. He was watching Vinnie put his arm around you again, and he was watching you snuggle into him as if it was the most normal thing in the world. Matt just stared at the way he was holding you, holding you so close, and he was fighting the urge to rip his arm off.

“So… Come on, sit with us,” Madison urged awkwardly, not sure how to cope with the situation.

Matt knew he had to sit down, even though he was desperate to avoid it. He forced himself to move, and he very carefully sat down on the loveseat across the couch. He didn’t want to make eye contact with Vinnie, and he didn’t want to keep staring at you either.

They were all sitting around just chatting now, and Matt felt like he wanted to throw up. He kept glancing at the hickey on your neck, and he kept watching the way Vinnie held you. He had his arm draped over your shoulders, and he was rubbing your upper arm with his thumb and touching you like it was no big deal

Matt wanted to grab him by the throat, and he was forcing himself to keep his hands balled up on his thighs instead. Every few seconds, he would glance at the little red mark on your neck, and he would feel another twinge of jealousy and possessiveness every single time.

Suddenly, Chris said something, and even though Matt didn’t catch any of it, he was grateful, because he could not have made conversation right now.

Vinnie smiled and ran his hand over your shoulder, his fingertips brushing your bare skin.

Matt clenched his jaw. He wanted to bite his tongue until it bled, and he wanted to scream and punch something.

He didn’t understand how Vinnie could be touching you like that with such a smug look on his face, and he wanted to murder him for thinking he had the right to put his hands on you.

He watched Vinnie brush his fingertips over your shoulder and trace along the edge of the fabric of your dress…

You were sitting there completely comfortable while someone else’s hands were on you, and Matt thought that might be even more upsetting than the hickey itself.

He was the one that was supposed to be touching you, holding you, rubbing your skin with his thumb like that…

Nobody else was supposed to have those privileges. Nobody.

Chris and Nick were chatting with Madison about something, and Matt was painfully aware that he should be engaging in the conversation. He kept his eyes on them, making sure they were distracted, before finally stealing a glance and you and Vinnie.

You were facing each other now, and he watched as Vinnie touched your cheek with his hand. He was touching your face, and he was doing it with such affection that he might as well have been declaring himself as your boyfriend.

Touching your face was the single most personal thing that Matt had ever done with you, and he wasn’t going to tolerate someone else daring to touch you that way.

He watched Vinnie put his hand against your cheek and slide it down to the side of your neck… He almost lost it when he touched the spot he’d just been staring at. He heard you giggle as Vinnie touched the hickey and he wanted to throw up.

“So…” Nick suddenly couldn’t hold it in anymore. “Are you two, like…?”

Finally, the question was out there.

Matt was desperate to know the answer.

He watched you and Vinnie share a look, and his heart was in his throat as he waited for the response.

You seemed to be communicating with the look.

You were just looking at him, and Matt could see a hint of nervousness on your face…

He wasn’t sure if he was imagining it, but he thought he might have seen you bite your lip slightly.

A few more seconds of you just sitting there silently passed, and Matt realized that he was holding his breath.

You were both looking back and forth between each other and back to him and back to each other, and he was desperate for one of you to finally say something.

“We, um…” You let out a nervous chuckle. “We’re… Talking.”

Matt’s heart sank.

Somehow, hearing you say that was a million times worse than if you’d just said, “Yes”.

Talking.

You and Vinnie were discussing what you were to each other. Like you were deciding if you were dating.

He suddenly wanted to rip his hair out.

He felt like he’d been punched in the gut.

You had a hickey on your neck from Vinnie, and you were telling him that you were deciding if you were dating…

He suddenly wanted to crawl into a hole and die, and he wanted to smash Vinnie’s face into a wall at the same time.

Talking wasn’t dating, and Matt felt a small flicker of relief that you hadn’t just told him that you were officially a couple yet.

But you had a hickey on your neck.

If his official boyfriend status still wasn’t established, how had that happened?

He glanced at the hickey again, his eyes tracing over the little red mark on your skin.

There was no way you’d just let someone else mark you if you didn’t think he was going to be your boyfriend…

And now you and Vinnie were discussing it, and it felt like he’d been stabbed straight through the heart.

But even if you weren’t dating, you were sleeping together. And that killed him.

Matt was staring at you, but his vision was starting to go blurry, his chest was getting tighter, and it was getting harder to breathe and he was so upset he felt like he was going to vomit all over the floor.

Somehow, he heard himself say, “You mean like… Dating?”

You licked your lips nervously. “We're... Seeing each other. Casually. For now.”

Casually.

His heart was beating so hard that he felt like it was going to burst through his chest, and he felt a wave of nausea wash over him.

The idea that you’d decided to date casually was horrifying.

He couldn’t believe you’d just jump from an intense, passionate relationship with him to a casual dating scenario with Vinnie.

His first instinct was to protest… To say that you couldn’t do that… To tell you that you needed to break it off with Vinnie right now because you couldn’t make the transition… Couldn’t start casually dating someone right after the crazy, passionate situation that you’d just had with him…

He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t look you in the eye.

He glanced down at the floor as he swallowed thickly, his mind starting to race with the new information.

“How long have you guys been seeing each other?” It was all he could think to ask.

His voice was raspy and cracked, but he needed to know. He had to know just how much he’d missed out on, how long you’d been with someone else instead of him.

"About a month," Vinnie answered with a grin, almost proudly, hugging you a little tighter.

Matt’s heart ached at Vinnie’s answer.

Three months. They’d been broken up for three months, and you’d been seeing Vinnie for a month. That meant he’d spent a month missing you—wishing he could be the one holding you like that, wishing he was the one to put his hands all over you like that—while someone else got to do it instead.

And now you were letting him do it, and you were even giggling about something while he was whispering into your ear and touching your skin with his fingertips.

Matt was starting to feel like he was underwater.

He was trying to take deep, steady breaths, but he felt like he was breathing in mud or something, like someone was holding his head under water and his lungs were filling up with something poisonous.

It had been three months of him missing you, of him crying over you, of him thinking of you.

And this was what you’d been doing instead of being with him. Of you dating someone else—someone so much worse than him—and of you letting someone else hold you and touch you like that.

He hated the way Vinnie’s hand was stroking your arm like he had the right to do that.

He hated the way your body was curled into his like you felt comfortable being so physically close to Vinnie.

But more than anything, he hated the way your hand was on Vinnie’s thigh, so casually… Like it was an everyday occurrence for you to touch someone else.

His eyes kept catching on that damn hickey, and he couldn’t help but stare at it again.

You were letting someone else give you love bites, and it made him feel like he might throw up.

Because how Vinnie could ever truly satisfy you? Did he really even know you? Did he know your needs? Knew what you liked? How you sounded? How you looked?

Of course, he didn’t know those things. And if he did, he couldn’t know all of them…

There was no way that Vinnie knew how to satisfy you like he could.

And that just made it all so much worse.

The fact that you were letting someone else touch you and claim you and make you giggle and make you smile and make your body sing and oh God, he was going to explode, he was going to scream, he couldn’t take this pain, he couldn’t breathe…

He was gripping his thighs so tightly now that his knuckles were white, and his chest was so tight that he couldn’t take deep enough breaths.

He could feel panic closing in around him, and he was just trying to fight the urge to grab you, and pull you away, and shake some sense into you.

He wanted to shake you until you realized that you didn’t belong with Vinnie, that you belonged with him, and that the way Vinnie was touching you was a crime because you were his, and his alone…

He didn’t care if Vinnie was more famous or more rich or more muscular or anything like that. He just knew that he knew you the best. He knew you the most intimately, and his love for you was more intense than anything Vinnie could offer.

He was the one who would have done anything for you, and he was the one who was so, so incredibly deeply in love with you that it was tearing him apart at the seams. He was the one who had taken the most care to learn your body and your needs specifically.

He couldn’t believe you’d let someone else touch you like that. He couldn’t believe you’d let someone else mark you like he had the right to claim you like that…

He knew he’d be gentle with you, and he knew he’d be soft with you, and he knew he’d be so, so damn passionate every time he put his mouth on you.

He knew your body and he knew the spots that made your toes curl and he knew the way you sounded when you came.

He couldn’t understand how you’d be satisfied with casually sleeping with Vinnie.

He could see you leaning up against Vinnie, laughing at something he was saying, and he felt like he was dying.

How could he be making you laugh like that when it was Matt who made you laugh so hard it sounded like the sweetest music on earth?

How could he be making you feel so casual and comfortable when the things Matt did to you made you melt into a puddle?

He couldn’t do this anymore.

He just couldn’t stomach watching you lean up against Vinnie and let him laugh and touch you and whisper into your ear and do all the things that Matt had been doing to you for months.

He knew he had no right to be feeling these things, and he knew that you didn’t belong to him anymore…

But goddamn, it still hurt.

He’d tried as hard as he could to contain himself, but he couldn’t do it anymore.

He suddenly shot to his feet and turned so fast that his head swam, making his way out of the room as quickly as possible without breaking into a run.

He managed to slam the bathroom door shut behind him, immediately lurching forward to catch himself on the sink.

There was a ringing in his ears, and his vision was still swimming a little from how fast he’d stood up, and he suddenly felt nauseous.

He gripped the edge of the sink so hard that his joints felt like they were threatening to pop, and he was struggling to pull in deep enough breaths.

Everything was just crashing into him all at once: the fact that you had a hickey on your neck, the fact that you’d been seeing someone else, the fact that it had been a month and he’d been missing you the entire time…

He suddenly felt like he was on fire, and he reached up to grab at his hair before doubling over, his stomach suddenly turning in an intense wave of nausea.

He hadn’t eaten much all day, and he was suddenly very dizzy, and he didn’t think he’d ever experienced this level of emotional pain in his entire life.

It was like he was being tortured: his entire body was aching from how much it hurt to experience this level of anguish.

He was gripping the edge of the sink so hard that he was surprised the porcelain didn’t crack under the pressure, and he was breathing so hard that he wondered if it was possible for a person to die of heartache.

His chest was agonizingly tight, and he was suddenly wondering if it was possible for a person’s heart to actually break.

He was gripping the side of the sink with one hand, and bracing his other one against the wall, and he was struggling to control his breathing long enough to force himself to inhale and exhale and stay standing.

He was bent over so far that his forehead was almost touching the cool countertop of the bathroom sink, and he was struggling to stay conscious and keep taking deep breaths…

For a second, he thought he was hallucinating when he heard a knock on the door.

It was like his mind was playing a trick on him, trying to convince him that there was someone on the other side of the door because he was so damn close to passing out…

Before he could realize it, he was already being helped to sit down on the cool bathroom floor, but everything was so blurry, that he barely could register anything.

He tried to focus, but he felt so disoriented.

The room was shifting in and out of focus, and his head was pounding, and the world was suddenly spinny and fuzzy and just… Wrong.

His vision focused for a few seconds, and he finally recognized who was helping him, and he suddenly couldn’t help but wonder if it might be better if he did pass out…

He stared up at you, his eyes searching your face.

Everything kind of slowed down as he looked at you, and it was almost like he was seeing you for the first time.

He took you in slowly as if he was suddenly memorizing every millimeter of you.

Your hair was a little rumpled, and your cheeks were flush, and he couldn’t tell if your eyes looked worried or concerned or both.

He was suddenly aware of the fact that you were leaning over him, studying his face, and he realized that you were holding him.

“Hey… Hey, can you hear me?” you asked but your voice sounded like he was underwater.

He tried to swallow, but he didn’t seem to have enough saliva in his mouth to make his throat move.

He suddenly remembered that you’d asked him a question, and he was trying to form some words, but he felt like his tongue didn’t work either.

He couldn’t figure out how to make any sounds.

“Breathe, okay?” His hand suddenly found itself pressed against your chest, feeling the steady beating of your heart. “Feel my heart. Try to match my breathing.”

He could feel the steady thumping of your heart under his palm, and he suddenly felt like he wanted to crawl inside your chest so he could burrow himself right up against your heart.

It was a steady, reassuring thump thump thump, and even if he couldn’t control the rest of his body, he at least seemed to be taking breaths in time with the beating of your heart.

You were always so good at helping him with his anxiety, with his panic attacks. You knew exactly what to do to make him calm down. But it didn't help much when the reason was you. You and your new lover.

He couldn’t help but remember a time when you’d been helping him through a panic attack in your bed… He couldn’t help but remember the way you would press your chest up against his back, and the way you’d whisper in his ear to try and soothe him.

It was just another thing that he’d taken for granted, and he’d been so damn clueless to not realize how spoiled he’d been that you’d done things like that for him…

And he suddenly wanted you to stop helping him, because even though you were being so gentle and careful while you talked to him, and even though you were holding him like he was the most valuable thing in your entire world, you weren’t his.

You were Vinnie’s, and he had never felt more painfully aware of that fact than he did at this very moment.

He tried to swallow again, and suddenly it was a little easier, and he almost had enough saliva in his mouth now.

And just like before, he could feel your heart thumping under his hand, and he suddenly didn’t want you to stop holding him, because it was the closest he’d been to your body in months, and even if you weren’t his anymore, he couldn’t get himself to stop craving you.

His hand was still pressed up against your chest, and he could feel your chest expanding against his palm every time you took a deep breath.

It was reminding him of the way you’d hold him when he was feeling particularly anxious. You liked to have him rest his head on your chest so that he could feel the movement of your breathing and mirror your breathing pace.

He suddenly realized that you were probably doing that on purpose, because you knew that it would help calm his breathing even more, and he wished that you’d just stop caring about him like this.

He loved the way you always knew exactly what to do to help him, and he loved how familiar you were with his anxiety, but it just made you leaving worse, because he knew that no one else could help him like you did.

He was suddenly reminded of the first time you’d ever helped him with a panic attack, and how you’d learned quickly to recognize the signs that he was starting to freak out.

You’d known what to look for in his body language, and you’d gotten so familiar with the way he tensed up, how his eyes unfocused, and how his breathing escalated whenever he started to struggle.

You noticed that he left suddenly, and you noticed that he was probably losing control, and you abandoned Vinnie to come and comfort him, even though he didn’t have any right to your comfort.

But you came anyways, and you knelt down and you held him the way you always did, and you were being so damn soft and so damn gentle with him, and he ached with how much he missed you…

“Are you okay?” you whispered suddenly.

He felt like that was such an awful, stupid question that it almost would’ve hurt worse if you hadn’t asked it.

Because the answer was so obviously no, he was not okay.

He was so far from being okay that he couldn’t even see “okay” as a distant speck on the horizon

He was drowning. He was dying. He was breaking from missing you. From still loving you. From having to watch you with someone else.

Matt suddenly felt like he wanted to scream out how not okay he was, but he was worried that if he opened his mouth, the only sound that would come out would be a strangled whimper of pain.

His chest was aching with the way he still loved you, and every time he breathed, it felt like his heart was getting crushed.

He knew there was a certain amount of “emotional pain” that a person’s body could endure before it became literally intolerable, and he was suddenly wondering if a person could die of heartache.

He had this sick, twisted thought that maybe dying would be easier than dealing with the sharp, intense, overwhelming pain he had whenever he saw you.

Whenever he saw you smiling at Vinnie. Whenever he saw you laughing with Vinnie. Whenever he saw you leaning into Vinnie, with that look in your eyes…

“Please, I'm really worried.” He suddenly heard your quiet voice, full of concern.

He heard how worried you sounded, and he suddenly wanted to reassure you that he was fine.

He wanted to tell you that you could go back to Vinnie and that you didn’t need to worry about him, and that he didn’t want you to worry about him, and that he wanted you to be happy with Vinnie…

But he suddenly felt like he might start sobbing from how not fine he was if he tried to speak.

He tried to take in a deeper breath, but he knew he was on the verge of a really bad panic attack, because every time he tried to inhale, it got harder and harder for his chest to expand.

He was drowning, he was dying, and he suddenly couldn’t think of any way to make you stop being so goddamn concerned and worried about him right now.

He wanted to scream at you to go away, to stop being so soft, to stop touching him like this, and to stop making him remember all the things he loved about you.

But he could only focus on the movement of your chest under his, because every time you breathed, your chest gently expanded against his palm, reminding him of the way he’d sleep with his head on your chest at night.

“Matt, please, breathe…” you whispered desperately.

He was trying to breathe, but he suddenly felt like he couldn’t even remember how, and his chest felt so tight, and he didn’t know how to fix it because it suddenly felt like his body was rejecting every attempt he made at breathing and the more he tried to force himself to get a lungful of air, the worse it seemed to get.

He felt his heart rate speeding up again, and he felt like he was starting to hyperventilate, and he was terrified that he was going to pass out again, and he suddenly started to struggle to control his breathing even more.

And then, when nothing else worked, and he was on the verge of passing out from the lack of oxygen… Your lips suddenly were on his.

Every thought suddenly vanished from his mind, and all at once he was so overwhelmed with how perfect your lips felt against his that the only thing he could think about how good it felt…

He suddenly completely forgot about everything else, and he only focused on how it felt to have your breath mingling with his, and how it felt to have your lips working against his.

Your lips were so soft on his, and he remembered the way your mouths always seemed to fit so perfectly together and he felt like he’d been starving this entire time, and you were the only thing he’d been craving to fill the aching void inside him.

When you pulled away, he’d leaned up to follow you, and he’d almost whimpered at the loss of your mouth against his.

But he was breathing.

He was still struggling to get enough oxygen, but every breath was feeling less constricted than it had a minute ago.

He suddenly wanted you to kiss him again.

He wanted to feel your mouth on his for longer than the few short seconds you’d just given him, because he’d almost forgotten how much he’d craved something as simple as your kiss, and he suddenly wanted to beg you to kiss him again because at least if you were kissing him, you weren’t kissing Vinnie.

“Is that better?” you whispered, your voice still full of worry.

He could only nod because his chest was still tight as you looked at him with that worry-filled expression on your beautiful face.

He suddenly wanted to lie to you and tell you that he was fine and that you didn’t need to worry about him, and that you could go back to Vinnie without any guilt, but he’d never lied well enough to fool you before, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to fool you now.

His chest suddenly ached from loving you so much.

His entire body ached from the desire he had for you, because his skin suddenly buzzed from how much he wanted to touch you, and he felt like he had to clench his hands into fists to keep from reaching up to touch your face, or touch your hair, or run his fingers down your bare arms.

He was suddenly very aware of just how much of your skin he could see right now, and he suddenly couldn’t stop himself from studying your body and remembering all the memories he harbored of what your skin felt like against his palms, or under his mouth.

He tried to keep his eyes focused on your face, but he suddenly couldn’t keep his attention away from the bare skin of your thighs, and he suddenly couldn’t help but imagine what you’d look like underneath him, in the way he hadn’t had the privilege to do in months.

He couldn’t help but wonder what you’d look like on top of him, straddling his waist in the same way he used to hold you, and he suddenly felt like he could practically taste your skin in his mouth as he struggled to breathe around the desire he had for you.

“Matt, talk to me,” you said pleadingly.

He couldn’t talk to you, because if he’d opened his mouth, he was going to say something awful, like how he still loved you, or how he didn’t want you to be with anyone but him, or how he didn’t want you kissing anyone but him.

He suddenly didn’t trust himself to keep his tongue from spitting out the truth that he was dying inside because he still wanted you to be his.

Matt wanted to ask you why you kissed him. He wanted to know if you did it because you wanted to make him feel better, or if you just did it out of reflex.

He loved that you still seemed so worried for him, and he loved that you’d come to his aid, but he suddenly wished that you hadn’t done something like kiss him, because it just made loving you harder.

And as if you could read his mind, you explained. But then again, you always knew him better than he knew himself. “You couldn't breathe. And when… When I kissed you, you held your breath. I… I read once that holding your breath can stop a panic attack.”

He hated that you were right and that you’d probably read that somewhere, because he hated that you could fix him when he didn’t even deserve your help, and he suddenly didn’t trust himself to hold his tongue back any longer.

He suddenly felt like he had to let you know the truth, and he suddenly didn’t know how to stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth.

“I miss you.”

The words suddenly slipped out before he had the chance to stop them, and he sounded so desperate as he said them, and he knew that you hadn’t missed how helpless and lost he truly was, because you knew him too well now.

Your face suddenly fell, and Matt was almost sure he saw the exact moment when your heart broke.

He could see how those three words had clearly hurt you, and he hated that he caused you pain, in any form, but he couldn’t stop himself from staring into your eyes and telling you the truth.

“I miss you, all the time.”

He suddenly felt like if he said those words out loud, you might understand just how badly he was aching from missing you, and how he couldn’t get through each passing day without hurting from how much he still longed for you.

“Matt…” You sighed, your voice broken.

He loved how soft your voice still was when you spoke his name, and he ached with longing for you, even as he stared into your eyes.

“I miss you every night when I go to bed,” he suddenly blurted out, because he couldn’t hold anything back from you now.

He didn’t have the power to hold his tongue back anymore, because you were staring at him with your big, beautiful eyes, and he was drowning in how much he missed you.

“I sleep on your side of the bed because it still smells like you,” he whispered, the words rushing out like he couldn’t stop the truth from leaving his mouth now.

He felt like he was confessing his deepest, darkest secret to you now, but he felt like he just needed you to know how much he was aching without you, and how badly he was struggling without being able to curl up against you.

“I’ve taken your pillows and your blankets, but nothing is as soft as you are,” he confessed in a voice that he couldn’t control anymore.

He felt like he was spilling his soul into your hands, opening up about the small details of how he’d been coping without you, and how he’d just been aching and struggling and missing you every single night.

“All day, every day, I just miss you,” he got out in a voice that sounded strangled.

He felt like he couldn’t swallow past the lump in his throat, and he felt like he wanted to beg you to come back to him, and to stop making him so damn lonely all of the time…

“I… I can’t eat,” he blurted out, and his voice sounded thick, raspy, and choked up.

Matt suddenly felt like he didn’t want to admit to you how he’d lost weight since you’d left because he didn’t want you to be so worried for him, but he suddenly needed you to know, so that you knew how badly you were affecting how he was taking care of himself.

“I skip meals,” he got out in another confession because he could tell you were looking worried for him now, and he suddenly had to get it out before you could start fretting about him. “I don’t mean to, but when I think of eating, it makes my stomach hurt. And when I try to force myself to eat, I get sick to my stomach, and I feel like I’m gonna puke it right back up.”

Your eyes were full of tears, and you were covering your lips with your hand, but you were listening.

“I can never sleep for more than a few hours,” he whispered next because he suddenly felt like he needed you to know just how much restlessness haunted him now. “And… And whenever I go too long without sleeping, my anxiety gets worse.”

“My chest gets really tight, and I have nightmares,” he confessed because he knew that you needed to know how much his mental health was deteriorating without you because you always seemed to be the thing that grounded him from spiraling into anxiety attacks or breakdowns.

He wanted you to know every little detail of how he’d been struggling without you.

“I have these nightmares every night, but… But they feel like they could be real, and they make me so scared to go to sleep because I dream about losing you,” he admitted because he felt like he had to explain just how scared he was of losing you altogether.

He suddenly wanted you to understand how his thoughts consumed him, without you to help him stay focused.

“And when I’m awake, I can’t stop thinking,” he blurted out. “My mind is racing all the time, because I can’t stop thinking about you, and I can’t stop missing you, and my mind just won’t stop screaming for you. All. The. Time…”

“And my head hurts. My heart hurts. My chest hurts. My stomach hurts. I ache everywhere without you. And, and, I just need you…” he admitted in a voice that sounded like he was broken.

“Matt…” you whispered once again, your voice breaking.

“I need you,” he repeated, and he was desperate for you to understand how badly he was struggling without you. “I can’t… I can’t sleep without you. I can’t eat without you. I can’t shower without imagining you’re with me, because I just need you all the time. In every way.”

“And it hurts so badly,” he got out in a raspy voice, finally admitting the aching he’d been suffering through for so long. “It hurts so badly that I can’t hug you, or touch you, or… Or, or be with you. I can’t stop missing you. I can’t stop craving you. I can’t stop loving you…”

Your lips parted, but no sound came out as you continued to silently cry, not even sure what to say anymore.

He suddenly couldn’t keep himself from confessing his thoughts to you.

“And, and it’s been hell without you, imagining you with another guy,” he blurted out, unable to keep himself from admitting how much he hated that you were with someone other than him.

“And, and I keep thinking about how he’s kissing you, and touching you, and taking you, and I just— God, how I hate him,” he got out in a strangled voice, and he felt like he was going to be sick…

“It just makes me so, so, so sick, thinking about how he gets to touch you now. How he gets to kiss you, and touch your bare skin, and taste you, and— God, I just— I just fucking hate it,” he whispered in a voice that still sounded broken, aching, and desperate.

“It’s driving me crazy to think that he can touch you, and taste you, and be with you when I want you so badly I can’t see straight.”

Matt knew he sounded possessive and obsessive, but he couldn’t help it, because he had been wanting you so badly for so goddamn long now.

“It hurts so bad to think about you with him. And how he gets to have you… I can’t stop thinking about you in bed with him. And— and— I just—” he suddenly trailed off, because he felt like his heart was throbbing inside his chest

“I just… God, I just want you back,” he whispered in an aching voice because he felt like he’d been dying inside without you. “So badly… I’ve just been wanting you so damn badly, and I just… I just can’t stop…” he repeated, and he suddenly felt like he’d never stop aching for you.

“You're the one who ended things,” you reminded him in a broken whisper.

He suddenly felt like a knife plunged into his heart as you reminded him that he was the one who had ended things between you.

Of course, he knew that he was the one who had walked away from you. Of course, he knew that his reasons hadn’t been the best ones and that they hadn’t been good enough to justify his decision.

But God, hearing you say those words to him, it felt like you were reminding him that he was to blame for his suffering now.

His eyes suddenly blurred from unfallen tears, and he suddenly felt like he couldn’t breathe.

“I…” he whispered faintly, trying to form a response to explain himself, since you still didn’t know exactly why he’d ended things with you.

“I…” he suddenly whispered again, because he felt like he was drowning from how badly he’d missed you, and from how he’d just exposed how broken he was.

“I’m sorry,” he blurted out, and he could hear how raspy his own voice was sounding, and he felt his throat suddenly closing up on him now. “I’m so, so sorry…”

“I was waiting for you for over a month,” you whispered, your voice choked. “And you waited until I started to move on to say anything.”

He felt like his throat was going to close up on him, and he felt like it was impossible to even swallow as he remembered how he’d just let you wait for him.

God, he’d been such an idiot for making you wait for him this entire time, and he knew it had been wrong of him, and now you were moving on, and it was his fault.

“I… I was… I was scared,” he confessed because he didn’t have the heart to lie to you.

He just couldn’t hold the truth in any longer.

“I was scared to reach out again, even though I’d been missing you the entire time,” he whispered because he knew you’d been right. He’d waited too damn long.

You sighed shakily. “Vinnie… Is a really nice guy. He treats me really good, Matt.”

His entire body suddenly felt like it stung from how badly he didn’t want to hear how you were with a nice guy.

“Yeah?” he whispered, but he didn’t care right now how you were being treated by someone else.

He suddenly didn’t care how nice he was to you.

He suddenly didn’t care how much you probably liked Vinnie.

He suddenly only cared about what he wanted from you, and how badly he missed you.

“Does he hold you tight?” he blurted out, suddenly desperate to learn everything he could about you now that you were with another guy. “Does he touch you?”

The words were rushing out of him before he’d even had the chance to stop them.

Your eyes widened as he caught you off guard, but you answered anyway, “Yes. He does.”

His heart throbbed at your answer, and he suddenly felt sick from learning that you let another guy touch you the same way he used to touch you.

“Does he kiss you?” he whispered desperately, unable to stop himself from learning the answer.

“Yes,” you whispered shakily.

His stomach churned and ached as you admitted that you’d been kissing someone else other than him.

“Does he… Does he make you feel good?” he whispered, and suddenly he just had to know if this guy was giving you everything he’d used to give you. He felt like his entire body was throbbing from how badly he wanted to know if you liked doing those things with this Vinnie guy. “Does he… Does he please you?”

“He does.”

He felt like his heart was being torn out of his chest, and he felt like he’d been punched as you admitted that this Vinnie guy was pleasing you just as well as he used to…

He didn’t know how the hell to respond to that information, as he felt like he’d been stabbed, but he just couldn’t stop himself from asking another question.

“Are you… Does he, um… Does he make you, um…” Matt tried to ask you another question, but suddenly couldn’t get it out of his mouth, because he felt like he was choking at even just the thought of this guy touching you in any way.

But you understood anyway, your voice being a broken whisper. “Yes.”

His heart stung and ached even more as you confirmed his suspicions that this Vinnie guy was… He was giving you what you needed.

He could feel himself choking at that realization.

He closed his eyes, and he suddenly was trying to take a deep breath, but his entire body was aching so badly now, and his chest was so damn tight…

Matt suddenly didn’t even really have any more words, because there wasn’t anything else he could say to you. He’d gotten the answers to his questions, and he’d learned that he really was too late to salvage anything between you.

He opened his eyes and looked at you once again, and he suddenly had to swallow down a thick lump in his throat as he gazed at your face. Your eyes were sparkling faintly, probably from tears, but he didn’t know if they were tears of happiness or tears of sadness.

He didn’t know if you were happy with this other guy, or if you were still just as miserable and lonely as him.

He just wanted to know if he’d lost his chance at the only thing that would ever make him completely happy.

“Are you… Do you love him?” he whispered because it was the only question he could think to ask now.

Your eyes widened before you averted your gaze, not answering. The first question you didn't answer.

His stomach churned and ached at your silence, and he took a shuddering breath as he realized that her silence was a much louder answer than you knew.

But he still wanted you to say the words, just so that he could know for sure.

“Y/N,” he whispered, and his voice was raspy from how badly he was aching from this. “Are you in love with him?”

And then, his world came to a halt. Because you said, „No.”

Matt felt like his heart skipped a beat, and he felt like all the air had been knocked out of his lungs as he heard the word ‘no’ come out of your mouth.

He stared at you for a few seconds, and his head suddenly started to spin at what you’d just confessed to him…

“W… What?” he choked out, his voice strangled.

“Not yet, at least,” you clarified quietly.

Not yet. Yet. Meaning you weren’t in love with him right now, but someday, you could be…

Somehow, that little yet was the worst thing you could’ve said to him, because it gave him some kind of sickening hope that maybe, somehow, he still had some kind of chance with you.

He felt a fresh wave of nausea as he thought about it.

Someday, you could end up falling in love with this guy.

And someday, you could end up marrying him.

All of these thoughts suddenly swirled in his head, and he felt like his whole world was closing in around him now, like he couldn’t breathe…

He was overwhelmed by the idea of that, of you someday falling in love with this guy, of you someday marrying him, and of you someday doing all the things that you’d once said you’d only do with him…

He couldn’t breathe, and his body was suddenly shaking so badly that he thought he’d fall if he wasn't already sitting on the floor.

Matt closed his eyes because it was all too much.

It was too much, to think about you someday doing all the things you’d once said you only want to do with him with someone else.

It was too much, to think about you falling in love with anyone other than him.

He suddenly felt so, so alone, more than he’d ever felt in his life.

Matt heard a strangled sound come out of his own throat, and he realized that it was a strangled sob and that the tears had finally started spilling over his eyes.

“Please,” he heard himself whispering, and he felt so desperate now that he was so on the edge. “Please don’t fall in love with him…”

“Matt…” You sighed shakily.

He suddenly heard his own broken voice begging you.

“Please, please, please, don’t,” he pleaded, and God, he could hear desperation in his voice. “Please don’t fall in love with him, because… God, I just—”

He cut himself off, feeling like his heart was breaking all over again at how utterly hopeless this was.

His shoulders shuddered with a sob, and hot tears burned his throat and his eyes as he stared at you, still begging you not to fall in love with him. “Because, and, if you love him, then… then I… I…”

He stopped as his breath suddenly caught in his chest, because he felt like saying what he was about to say would just break his heart again, and he wouldn’t be able to survive it this time.

But no matter how awful and sickening it would be, he knew that he had to say it.

“If you fall in love with him, I won’t—“ he blurted out, his voice shaky, cracking, and breaking, “I won’t be able to survive it… I already can’t breathe without you…”

“I've waited… For you to call, for you to text me… For two months. And you didn't,” you whispered. “And when... And when I decided it was time to move on, you… You say all that.”

He felt a new wave of nausea at that, knowing just how badly he’d screwed up for you to say those words to him.

Of course, you had to move on. He hadn’t given you much of a choice, now had he?

The last three months had been hell, and he’d been so damn scared and hopeless.

And now, he was hearing the bitter truth that he’d driven you straight to another guy’s arms.

Matt let out another strangled sob as you pointed it out to him, because God, it was just too painful and horrible to hear out loud.

“I… I waited too long… I know I did…” he replied, in a strangled voice. “I just was so… so scared to reach out… because… I didn’t think you’d even want to hear from me…”

He squeezed his eyes closed, and he pressed a hand to his chest as if he were trying to slow his racing heart. The pain and the heartache of these last three months had been nearly too much to handle, and he suddenly couldn’t stop himself from admitting it to you now.

“I… I didn’t think you’d even want to see me…” he whispered, and his voice broke, and he suddenly wasn’t even capable of keeping the tears from flowing down his face now.

Matt looked at you again, seeing the pain on your face, and feeling another wave of nausea at being the cause of it.

Jesus, he’d really, really done a number on you by leaving you…

He swallowed hard because he didn’t know what else to say right now, and he was trying to force himself to breathe because he suddenly didn’t even feel like he could right now.

He took a few more shaky breaths, trying to still his racing heart, because God, he was just so overwhelmed and overcome by seeing you and talking to you right now, and by learning that you were with someone else, and by admitting that he’d nearly driven himself to utter depression by leaving you.

“I just… I need… I need to know one thing. Are you happy?” he suddenly asked, and he didn’t even know if he wanted to know the answer, because it had been torture to think about you being with someone else, and it had been hell to think about you being happier with someone else.

Your lips parted, but no sound came out. There was a clear conflict in your eyes. And you didn't answer.

Matt suddenly felt like he was being punched in the stomach by how silent you remained, how you weren’t saying anything.

He felt utterly sick at your silence because it was so obvious now that you weren’t… You weren’t happy. He’d always been able to tell when you were really, really happy, and he hadn’t seen that look on your face when you’d been talking about that guy.

No, you weren’t. You were miserable.

It hurt more than he could express just hearing it in your silence.

It hurt like hell to know that you weren’t even happy with someone else…

“God,” he whispered, as the anguish of your silence suddenly hit him full force, and his shoulders started to shake again. “God, I feel so sick…”

He pressed a trembling hand to his mouth, trying to hold back another strangled sob from escaping his throat as he felt sick to his stomach just thinking about you being miserable and alone while still being with someone else.

He’d put you through this… He’d put you through hell, and he’d made you miserable…

And that made him feel like a piece of utter scum.

His body shuddered with another sob, and tears were falling freely again, and he felt so utterly helpless and hopeless at how screwed up this situation was.

“Jesus, please… I don’t want you to be miserable…” he whispered, and his own heartbreak was practically written all over his face now. “Please don’t be miserable…”

“I'm not miserable,” you whispered shakily. “Just… Not as happy as I used to be.”

He felt like your words had just stabbed him.

Hearing that you weren’t as happy as you used to be was so much worse than finding out you were miserable… Because you used to be utterly happy when you’d been with him.

“God, I… I can’t…” he whispered, and suddenly another strangled sob escaped his throat. “I can’t stand hearing that you’re not as happy…”

He pressed a hand to his mouth and shuddered again, trying to suppress the sudden, overwhelming urge to throw up right now as the grief just kept piling up.

You’d been so happy when you’d been with him. It was so obvious. He’d seen how happy you’d been. And now… now, you were just… not.

He suddenly had a flashback to your face, to you laughing and smiling and having fun with him, and his heart ached as he remembered how you’d always looked when he’d been with you…

“God, you used to be so damn happy,” he breathed out, and his voice was strangled. “You were so damn happy when you were with me…”

“I was,” you whispered, your voice breaking.

He let out another strangled sob at your reply, because hearing that you’d been happy when you’d been with him, and hearing that you weren’t anymore…

It was so much more horrible than anything that you could’ve said to him.

“I’m such a dick…” he breathed out, and he felt fresh tears burn and fall from his eyes.

He felt like he’d been sucker-punched because he knew that it was all his fault… He was the one who’d left you and hurt you, and his leaving was the reason why you weren’t as happy as you used to be.

“God, I hurt you…” he whispered, and he pressed his hands to his face now, trying to muffle his sobs.

He felt like he was drowning now, like the weight of this guilt and depression and regret was just pulling him further and further underwater.

“I’m so sorry…” he breathed out, and his whole body shuddered again as he tried to breathe. “God, I’m so sorry…”

You curled up against the wall, pulling your knees to your chest. Matt let out a strangled sob at the sight of you like that.

Jesus, you’d always curled up like that when you’d been sad or upset and he’d always held you… And you’d always laid your head against his chest and he’d held you so tightly.

God, how he suddenly longed to hold you again…

He longed to hold you in his arms, comfort you, and tell you how sorry he was.

And he longed to tell you to leave that guy and leave that miserable life and come back to him…

He looked at you, and his whole chest ached as he saw you were almost in the same position that he’d held you in a hundred times.

Jesus… He couldn’t stand this…

“Please come here…” he whispered, and the words left his mouth before he’d even realized what he was saying.

His whole body was aching with the need to hold you, and this situation was so screwed up and his emotions were so all over the place right now that he couldn’t even think straight, and he suddenly heard himself pleading to you.

“Please… Please come here and let me hold you like I used to…”

You were shaking and you knew you shouldn’t, but… You did it anyway.

Matt felt a fresh wave of nausea as you did actually comply and started shuffling over to him. And he tried to ignore the fact that you were wearing that tight, little dress.

He couldn’t resist the urge to touch you now, and he reached out to grab you. He reached out and pulled you so that you were settled down between his legs, your back was pressed up against his chest, and your head was resting just under his chin.

And he realized that it felt so good, so right, to hold you this way again…

He reached one arm around you and pressed his whole body up against yours, and he suddenly shivered, because he forgot how good it felt to have your body against his.

“Why, Matt?” Your body was trembling from surpassed sobs. “Why did you leave?”

He closed his eyes at that and held you even tighter as he heard the pain in your voice. His heart ached again as he realized how badly he’d hurt you, and it ached to hear that pain in your voice still, even after three months…

“God, baby…” he whispered, and his voice was choked again. “I left because I’m stupid…”

He turned his face down and nuzzled his face into your hair, taking a deep shuddering breath.

“I left… Because I’m a dumb jerk… And an idiot…” he whispered, his voice breaking again. “And because I’m a coward… And a fool…”

“It’s not a reason,” you reminded him in a hushed whisper.

He breathed out a shaky sigh because you were right. Those reasons didn’t matter… They didn’t matter at all…

It had still been such a complete mistake to leave you.

He swallowed hard, fighting the urge to break down again, and he started to admit the real reason: the true reason why he’d left.

“I left you because I was scared,” he whispered, in a choked voice. “So goddamn scared…”

“Scared of what, Matt?”

His shoulders shuddered and his breath hitched in his throat as he finally admitted it: the real reason why he’d left you… The thing he’d been running from for months…

“I was scared of everything,” he whispered. “I was scared of losing you… Scared that you’d get sick of me and leave me… Scared that one day you’d wake up and decide you didn’t want me anymore or that you wanted someone else… I was scared that you’d…”

He suddenly couldn’t say the words.

Because, God, thinking them had been hard enough, but saying them was practically impossible.

Hearing them out loud would be unbearable…

He swallowed hard again, forcing himself to say the words that would just wreck him.

“I was scared you’d… You’d stop loving me…”

Your eyes squeezed shut and another wave of tears spilled down your cheeks.

He felt his throat closing up again as he heard you crying now.

God… He realized how horrible and selfish and shitty this all sounded.

He felt an urge to just keep talking and just keep pouring out all this shitty and awful and screwed up stuff because he suddenly felt like he just had to get it all off his chest.

“I was scared that you’d wake up one day and realize that I’m just a nothing,” he blurted out, and he suddenly felt like he was falling apart again. “That…”

He swallowed hard and let out another shuddering breath as he felt a fresh wave of tears start to fall from his eyes again.

Jesus… He was in so deep… He was such a mess…

“That… T-that I’m not enough for you,” he whispered, and his voice was shaking, and he was crying again…

“You… You were scared that I’d leave…” you repeated. “So you left first?”

He closed his eyes, and his shoulders trembled as he let out another strangled sob as he realized just how stupid and shitty and awful that sounded…

Because, God, that was what he’d done, wasn’t it?

He’d been scared that you’d break his heart so the idiot that he was had gone and broken yours first.

“God…” he managed, his voice was still choked. “Jesus… Yeah. I left you… B-because I was scared I’d get left first…”

“What kind of bullshit is that?” You sobbed out.

He flinched a little at your words because he knew more than anything in the world that it was bullshit and that what he’d done was horrible and completely irrational and so goddamn selfish and wrong.

“I know…” he whispered, and he started to apologize again, because even though he’d said it a hundred times already he still couldn’t stop saying it. “God, I know. I know it’s bullshit… I just—“

He breathed in and had to fight back another strangled sob as he felt like he was drowning just talking about this.

“I’m just so stupid…” he whispered, and his heart and head were such a mess, and the words just kept falling from his mouth. “I’m a dumbass, and I’m so self-centered… I should’ve known… I should’ve known that you would never leave me… I’m just…”

He let out a strangled sob again, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe.

God, he’d been such a dumbass: he’d really left you because he was scared…

He’d left the most perfect girl he’d ever met because he’d been a dumbass and he’d been a sucker and a coward and so goddamn scared.

“And what do you want me to do now, Matt?” you asked quietly.

He swallowed hard, his heart aching in his chest.

“What do I…?” he murmured, and his heart leaped into his throat as he realized what you were saying. “God… baby, you don’t…”

And there was a desperate hope that was building inside of him, and his mind was racing as he tried to process everything: were you really about to have this conversation… Were you really about to ask him what he wanted… Did you really want to know if he still wanted you?

He held you even tighter, and a strangled sob escaped his throat. God, he just wanted to beg you, to just blurt out what he wanted and pray that you’d say yes, and pray that you’d take him back.

“I—” he choked out, his words falling like a desperate waterfall, “I want you. I want you, and… and I want you back… God, I just want you, baby…”

His heart was racing, his body was shaking, and his mind was racing as he tried to find the words to explain how much he wanted you.

“Please,” he found himself saying, tears starting to spill again, and he was pleading now. “Please come back to me. Please. I… I just want you again so bad, and it hurts so much being without you, and… God, I need you…”

“It’s not fair,” you whispered shakily. “Not to me, not to Vinnie…”

He felt his heart clench at the mention of that name.

God, he forgot that you were seeing that guy…

He swallowed hard, and his shoulders shook again, because he did realize that it wasn’t fair of him to be begging like this and asking you to come back when you were with someone else, and that… That he was the selfish one, and he was the villain, and he suddenly just wanted to stop and shut up and not ask you for anything.

But then he realized that he couldn’t just stop. The words just kept spilling from his mouth, and he couldn’t hold them back.

“Please… I know it’s not fair, I’m…” he whispered, and another sob escaped his throat, and his mind was going a million miles a minute, and all he could do was plead, “I’m trying, and I just… I need to be with you so badly… god, I miss you…”

He felt the words falling out of his mouth and he realized that he couldn’t stop talking, because all of the things he’d been feeling for three months were just racing through his mind, and he kept just spewing things out like a goddamn dumpster fire.

“Please… Please forgive me and just… just be with me. Please… I’m begging you…” he choked out. “God, I’m begging you, baby, I will do anything…”

There was a clear conflict on your face, you felt torn between your loyalty to Vinnie and your love for Matt despite everything.

He hated himself more than ever, because it was written all over your face how badly this was hurting you: you were conflicted and you were tearing up, and it was all because of him.

And his entire body ached because he didn’t want to hurt you anymore. He didn’t want to be the selfish, awful, evil villain in this situation, and… And he wanted to just shut up and tell you to stay with your boyfriend.

“So, what do you want me to do? Break things off with Vinnie?” you croaked out.

He closed his eyes again.

His body was on fire, and he wanted so badly to just say yes, to just tell you to end things with your boyfriend and come back to him, but…

He couldn’t do that to you.

He couldn’t, because that would be so damn selfish and so wrong and so unfair, and that’s exactly what he’d done months ago, and you’d begged him to stay and he’d just… He’d left anyway.

Matt suddenly felt like he was going to be sick.

Please, God, just let him do the right thing.

Let him be good and kind and fair enough to just tell you to stay with your boyfriend.

He opened his mouth, and for just a moment, all he wanted to do was to say “stay”, but then he started talking and the words just started falling from his mouth, and he couldn’t stop them, because his heart and mind were racing, and he was so, so scared you’d say no…

“No,” he whispered, and the word just slipped out before he could think clearly, and he realized it was the absolutely worst thing to say.

He felt bile rising in his throat, and he started pleading all over again, his voice so desperate he could feel how pathetic it sounded.

“Don’t. Don’t… I didn’t mean that. I’m… I’m an idiot. Ignore me, just… Just forget I said anything, don’t… Please… God, please don’t…”

“Because I will,” you told him, your voice shaking. “If you just tell me to.”

He felt like his chest was collapsing now.

You were actually going to do it… You were going to break things off with your boyfriend and come back to him if he just told you to.

And part of him wanted to say it. God, how he wanted to say it…

But he knew he couldn’t… He just… He couldn’t… He couldn’t, because that would be so selfish…

But despite how wrong it was, he felt like he was going to die without you. He already almost spiraled into a depression in the span of those three months since the breakup, he already couldn't sleep, couldn't eat, couldn't live.

He suddenly felt a choked, strangled sob rising in his throat, because he felt like he was going to die: he felt like if he didn’t have you, he wouldn’t be able to live, and his whole body ached and stung because he loved you, he loved you so damn much and he needed you…

God… He felt so desperate that he couldn’t stay quiet. He felt like he was begging for air at this point, and he just… He just had to blurt out what his body was screaming.

“Please… Just… Oh, god, please come back,” he sobbed out, his voice choked and full of pleading and tears again now. “God, I’m begging you, please just… I’m begging you to give me a chance. I’m so… so sorry, and I just… I need you. I need you. I can’t live without you, baby, I… Please…”

You gently took his hand in yours, feeling just how much he was trembling, and you pressed a soft kiss on the back of it. “I will.”

A strangled, gasped sob escaped his throat, and everything went white.

He didn’t believe it… He was hallucinating…

No… No goddamn way… He was dreaming, he had to be dreaming, because there was no way that you just said the one thing that he wanted more than anything else in life.

But then you kissed his hand, and the feeling of your lips was so real and so familiar that he realized it wasn’t a dream.

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everythingne · 6 months ago

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⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ ➛ make it known (op81)

You and Oscar have been friends for almost two decades and it’s been smooth sailing, except for now—when you have to make it publically known you're pining for him to even notice.

oscar piastri x childhood bestfriend!reader smau / face claim: none :D

warnings/notes: none really? one kinda bitchy comment from oscar bc he's king of the sassy man apocalypse. i love this so much, also do we like the new insta post format ?? im kinda meh about it.

liked by oscarpiastri, nicolepiastri, and others...

uruser: last week of cramming before the summer ( and visiting my favorite aussie in monaco ...)

user1: literally my queen.

nicolepiastri: best of luck with finals !!

⤷ uruser: thank u mama piastri !! 🩷

user2: best of luck yn!!

oscarpiastri: see u soon loser

⤷ ururser: u too bitch <3

⤷ logansargeant: what book are u reading now??

⤷ uruser: rereading pride and prejudice again

⤷ logansargeant:so we're watching it again after monaco ? @ oscarpiastri

⤷ oscarpiastri: movie night !!!

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, landonorris, and others...

uruser: ' i know im just a fool who's willing to sit around and wait for you ' 🩷

user3: stop who are u pining for queen ??

oscarpiastri: now whats all this then.

⤷ landonorris: u sound like @ georgerussel

⤷ uruser: lando don't bring more brits on my page pls im scared of u people

⤷ georgerussell: right, whats all this then?

⤷uruser: BACK!!! OUT!!! SHOO!! ALL OF U BOYS. THIS IS FOR THE GIRLS.

user4: oh honey its BAD.

logansargeant: oh this is the approach?

⤷ uruser: im desperate man.

⤷ oscarpiastri: wow. i introduced you to logan and you tell him your secrets before me?

⤷ logansargeant: oscar. i beg you to use your brain.

⤷ user5: logan what do you KNOW?

liked by laufey, nicolepiastri, oscarpiastri, and others...

uruser: new low: crying over lovesick by @ laufey

oscarpiastri: and you still wont tell me who this is about?

user6: and shes so real for this !!

laufey: NO. i didn't mean to make you cry beautiful :(

⤷ ururser: you've revived me by commenting so its ok queen <3

user7: hot take: she's pining over oscar.

⤷ user8: clearly you havent been an oscar fan since prema. this is not a new take LMAOO

user9: oscyn truthers RISE

nicolepiastri: you are too pretty to cry over a pretty song ! be brave and follow your heart !

⤷ uruser: i would if i wasnt afraid it would all go horribly wrong :(

⤷ nicolepiastri: trust me, if he's as smart as he was raised to be, it wont!! 😉

⤷user10: MAMA PIASTRI KNOWS?

liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, alexalbon, and others...

uruser: we'll end up like always.

user12: second time shes posted that handwriting....

user12: can someone explain how she and the f1 grid know eachother?? im so confused

⤷ user13: yn is oscar's childhood best friend!! her older brother karted with oscar and logan so she ussed to hang out with them a lot. shes an engineering student at MIT right now :)

lilymhe: oh my god STILL?

alexalbon: this is gonna go to after belgium PAY UP @ logansargeant

⤷ logansargeant: let me have faith alex please

⤷ uruser: i cannot BELIEVE you bet on this.

user14: is oscar writing the notes??

⤷ user15: you might be onto something...

logansargeant: we need to enact phase two. i swear it will work.

⤷ nicolepiastri: uh oh. be careful logan !!

⤷ logansargeant: i will mama piastri !

⤷user16: god speed logan

liked by williamsracing, logansargeant, alexalbon, and others...

uruser: help me tom cruise !! (i got abducted by williams this weekend)

tagged: logansargeant, alexalbon, lilymhe, oscarpiastri

logansargeant: tom cruise, use your witchcraft on me to get the fire off me !! ( it was great to have you !!)

user17: oscar only in the group photo... logan in almost every picture... yn and logan quoting talladega nights?? we are SO OVER OSCYN TRUTHERS.

williamsracing: blue is a nice change of color for you!

⤷ oscarpiastri: no >:(

⤷ uruser: LMAO OSCAR PLS

oscarpiastri: WOW. my TWO BEST FRIENDS hang out WITHOUT ME.

⤷ uruser: you both hang out without me ALL THE TIME.

⤷ logansargeant: i am the superior driver

⤷ oscarpiastri: and who has a seat next year

⤷ uruser: JESUS CHRIST OSCAR 😭

user18: IS THIS JEALOUSY?

user19: jealousy on oscar is FUNNY

alexalbon: i would say something but im afraid oscars gonna come at me too

⤷ oscarpiastri: 🧍‍♂️

⤷ alexalbon: @ uruser get ur man im scared

⤷ uruser: not my man

lilymhe: so fun to see you this weekend <3

liked by oscarpiastri, nicolepiastri, logansargeant, and others...

uruser: i forgot cats get jealous....

tagged: oscarpiastri

user20: THE IDENTICAL SHOE TYING PHOTOS IM IN TEAARRSSS

oscarpiastri: the cat agenda is so mean

⤷ uruser: says the man literally smacking me to get my attention

⤷ oscarpiastri: it worked didnt it?

nicolepiastri: oscar has always been like that since you two were very young!

logansargeant: phase two complete. good luck soldier 🫡

⤷ uruser: thank u logan, ive got it from here

user21: did they plan to make oscar jealous?? so he would admit he likes yn??

user22: SHUT UP THATS SO FUNNY

landonorris: oh thank god he'll stop whining now

⤷ user23: HELLO?

user24: OSCAR BEING JEALOUS OF LOGAN SHUT UPPPP

liked by logansargeant, alexalbon, oscarpiastri, and others...

uruser: logans plan worked?

tagged: oscarpiastri

logansargeant: and im still alive?

⤷ nicolepiastri: oscar won't kill spiders half the time, I didn't think he'd kill you, logan!

⤷ oscarpiastri: i was gonna ask kmag to hit you again (@ FIA this is a joke.)

⤷ uruser: oscar PLEASE THE FIA??

oscarpiastri: 🧡

⤷ uruser: wow u have such a way with words.

⤷ oscarpiastri: my pr team is staring over my shoulder i have to be careful

⤷ oscarpiastri: what i can say is sorry for being a blind idiot

alexalbon: i cannot BELIEVE this worked?

lilymhe: logan the mastermind, cannot wait to hear his speech at the wedding

landonorris: finally.

⤷ uruser: lando the strongest man thru this all

⤷ landonorris: i have heard oscar admit things you couldnt pry out of me.

⤷ oscarpiastri: literally what?

⤷ landonorris: ur mother is in this comment section, i can't say.

⤷ uruser: LANDO TEXT ME RIGHT NOW.

⤷ oscarpiastri: i was drunk probably

⤷ landonorris: stone cold sober. after practice during belgium?

⤷ oscarpiastri: oops.

⤷ uruser: JAW ON THE FLOOR.

#f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 smau #formula one fanfiction #formula one fic #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri x reader

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fear-is-truth · 12 days ago

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𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐆𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐁𝐀𝐆 … rodrick heffley — loser!bf headcanons

tags — fem!reader﹒sfw + nsfw﹒headcanons

loser bf!rodrick, who makes a huge show of pda whenever his brother is around. he’ll sling his arm around your shoulder and be like, “yeah, greg. my girlfriend. isn’t she hot?” greg is still fully convinced rodrick’s paying you to be his fake girlfriend, though he has no idea where he’s got the money.

loser bf!rodrick, who lets you sit in on band practice and tries so hard to keep it together, but the second his bandmates start flirting with you, he completely falls apart. his drumming gets so off-tempo that they have to stop and start over.

loser bf!rodrick, who lent you his algebra textbook and completely forgot he’d been doodling your name with his last name all over the margins. when you handed it back, smirking, he looked like he wanted to die.

loser bf!rodrick, whose idea of a date is a night drive to the gas station, where you both load up on slushies and hot dogs. you sit in the parking lot and steal bites off each other’s food (even though you have the same toppings)

loser bf!rodrick, who awkwardly asked his mom to use the “nice-smelling” laundry detergent on his shirts because he knows you like to steal them after having sex and he doesn’t want you thinking he’s gross.

loser bf!rodrick, whose mom acts like you’re already part of the family, offering you snacks and calling you “sweetie” every time you visit. she loves to (unintentionally) embarrassing her eldest son by showing you all of his baby pictures. all the while rodrick hides in the basement.

loser bf!rodrick, whose dad corners you during family dinners and awkwardly tries to sell you on how “rodrick is really a fine young man, despite, uh… some quirks.” you just nod politely while rodrick sits there, sinking into his chair with a beet-red face.

loser bf!rodrick, whose bandmates are constantly making moves on you, asking if you “need anything” during practice or offering to carry your stuff. rodrick will get so pissed that he threatens to kick them out of the band. you think it’s hilarious how defensive he gets.

loser bf!rodrick, who always gives you the front seat in his van, no questions asked. greg has to squish in the back with the instruments, too bad lol.

loser bf!rodrick, who pretends to be terrible at eyeliner just so you’ll do it for him. in return, he paints your nails—or you can also paint his (in exclusively black).

loser bf!rodrick, who acts reluctant whenever you drag him into photobooths at the mall. the two of you end up making the dumbest faces before you lean in and kiss him right on the mouth… with tongue.

loser bf!rodrick, who lets you doodle on his arm with a sharpie, and he refuses to wash them off. they stay there until they fade completely.

loser bf!rodrick, who finally starts wearing deodorant consistently because of you. it’s not even something you asked him to do—he just noticed you sniffing his shirts a little more critically and panicked. now, he’s always freshly applied before seeing you.

loser bf!rodrick, who gets hard every time you kiss him.

loser bf!rodrick, who tries his best to keep his room somewhat presentable whenever you come over. he knows it’s still a fucking disaster by normal standards, but for rodrick, clearing a path to the bed is a grand romantic gesture.

loser bf!rodrick, who’s obsessed so with seeing your hickeys on him. he never bothers to hide them—in fact, he wears them like badges lol.

loser bf!rodrick, who almost accidentally used the wrong side of the condom when you had sex for the first time.

loser bf!rodrick, who absolutely melts when you tug on his hair during sex. he didn’t even realise he had a thing for it until the first time you did it. now, he practically begs for it without using words, tilting his head back and grinning like a total idiot whenever your fingers get close.

loser bf!rodrick, who keeps every random thing you’ve ever given him — notes you’ve passed to him in class, concert tickets, even candy wrappers.

loser bf!rodrick, who hates being bossed around but will do anything you ask, especially if it involves you kissing his cheek or ruffling his hair in thanks. he’s so whipped and everyone knows it.

loser bf!rodrick, who brags to greg about how sexy and smart and pretty you are, just to rub it in, but secretly feels like he doesn’t deserve you. he gets this dumb, soft look on his face whenever you’re around, like he still can’t believe you chose him.

#rodrick heffley x reader #rodrick x reader #rodrick heffley #doawk rodrick #rodrick rules #rodrick heffley smut #rodrick heffley fanfic #rodrick heffley headcanons #rodrick heffley x y/n #rodrick heffley imagine #diary of a wimpy kid rodrick #rodrick heffley fanfiction #rodrick smut

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alltheirdamn · 9 months ago

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DECLINED | Mechanic!Joel x f!reader

PART 2

Summary: After a summer away, you decide to pay a visit to your favorite mechanic. Rating: 18+ Explicit Word Count: 3.7k Warnings: Pre-outbreak (AU), mechanic!joel, car sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, squirting, semi-public sex, multiple orgasms, slight overstimulation, light nipple play, unprotected piv sex, size kink, dirty talk, praise kink, pet names (darlin', babydoll, cowboy), cock riding, rough sex, creampie, joel once again being irresistible and disgustingly sweet, light sprinkle of fluff, porn with no plot (kinda) A/N: I have zero self-restraint and couldn't stop thinking about mechanic!joel soo... you could say, it was so nice she had to come twice ;)

PART 1 | Masterlist | Ko-fi

It wasn’t like you were actually planning on pulling off the highway to head toward that mechanic shop… except you totally were. Summer came and went, and after a few months spent in Tallahassee, it was time to go home. You weren’t in a rush this time, though, so you could afford a quick pit stop at a small mechanic shop. Nothing needed to be fixed in your car, but maybe you’d pop a screw loose just for the hell of it.

Pulling into the familiar garage, your heart thumped in your ears as you threw the car in park and nearly ran inside. The waiting room was disappointingly empty minus a handsome man standing behind the counter…one that wasn’t Joel.

His black curls were slicked back, and with just a white tank top and flannel on, you could tell he was built just like Joel. At your sudden entrance, he glanced your way, giving the cigarette in his hand a quick flick over the ashtray on the counter he leaned on.

“Can I help you with somethin’, miss?” He asked. He had that same drawl in his voice as Joel did.

Taming down your flyaways from the humidity, you walked over to the counter with a friendly smile. You didn’t miss how his eyes did a once-over on your body.

“I was just coming through town, thought I’d stop in to say hi to Joel,” you explained.

He took another drag of his cigarette, the cherry burning at the bottom. After a long inhale, he puffed out an air of smoke, filling the space with that stinging smell of nicotine. You weren’t completely opposed to the smell, and you most definitely appreciated him blowing it to the side so that it didn’t creep up into your nose.

“Joel’s just up at the mini-mart grabbin’ some beers. M’sure he’ll be back soon,” he shrugged. “I’m Tommy by the way, his brother.”

He extended his free hand, and you met him halfway to give him a friendly handshake, introducing yourself as well. Tommy donned that same lopsided grin as Joel; it must be that Southern charm and hospitality.

“So,” he drawled. “How y’know my brother?”

You shifted your weight between legs, trying to come up with some stupid lie to explain how you did know him. Short answer: he fixed your car. Long answer: he gave you the best orgasms of your life.

“I, uh, came through town a few months ago to get my car fixed, and—.”

“Hey, Tommy! Come help me with the beers, man!” A voice shouted from the side door.

Tommy gave you an apologetic grin, rounding the corner to meet his brother outside. You leaned against the counter, drumming your fingers against it as you waited for them to reemerge. Tommy was walking back through the door moments later, a six-pack of beers in hand and Joel in tow.

“C’mon man, I told you no smokin’ in the damn shop,” Joel grumbled, smacking the back of Tommy’s head.

Tommy only laughed at his brother's annoyance, walking around the counter to give Joel a clear view of you standing there. As his eyes set on you, Joel stopped in his tracks, a wild grin splitting across his face.

“Well, would y’look at that,” he beamed. “If it ain’t my favorite customer.”

A warmth crept up your skin, your cheeks blushing at his words. He approached you, leaning against the counter to mimic your stance. He still wore that worn-down black t-shirt, the fabric thinned out and stretching over his muscles. You wondered how long those scratches stayed on the skin of his back after you both…

“Ohhhh,” Tommy interrupted, forcing your eyes to tear away from Joel’s. “You’re the girl that’s got my brother out $500!”

Snapping your head back to Joel, you smacked his bicep in embarrassment.

“You told him?!” You shrieked.

Joel doubled over in laughter, clutching the arm you had just whacked.

“Calm down, darlin’. I ain’t ever think I’d see you again! S’all in good fun.”

You buried your face in your hands, letting out a small groan. Of course, he’d tell his fucking brother about you; the girl that didn’t have any fucking money for a car and slept her way out of the debt. You could bet Tommy probably didn’t believe Joel when he told him the story, either.

“Aw, c’mon now babydoll,” Joel crooned, peeling your hands away from your face. “I ain’t meant no harm in tellin’ the story.”

“He hasn’t told another soul,” Tommy said. You glanced over to see him raise a hand in defense. “Scouts honor.”

You smack Joel again for good measure, eliciting a howling laugh from Tommy on the other side of the counter.

“Tommy, I’ll close up the shop tonight,” Joel said, raising an eyebrow at his brother. “Why don’t you head out and grab Sarah for me? M’sure I’ll be back in time for the game.”

“Fuckin’ better be,” Tommy tossed back. “Ain’t tryna lose my money to you again.”

“Seems like he needs that money,” you chimed in, rolling your eyes.

This time Joel shoved at you playfully, a hearty laugh rumbling through his chest.

“Now she’s got jokes!” He teased.

“Ha ha very funny,” Tommy said, scooping up the six-pack into his arms. “Nice meetin’ ya miss. Don’t run up your tab too high while you’re here.”

Tommy was just as good with the jabs as you were, so you threw him a quick smile and wave before he slid out the back door and disappeared. With only Joel and you left, that nervous feeling crept back in.

“Got another tire blown out or did y’miss me?” Joel teased.

“Don’t let your ego get too big, cowboy,” you said. “I’m just rollin’ back through town.”

“Pretty sure I’m big everywhere, babydoll, but y’already know that.”

Joel took a step towards you, twisting a strand of your hair through his fingers. You could see the midday sun reflecting in his brown eyes, making them sparkle the longer he stared. Your gaze flicked down to his lips, that pouty bottom one quipped up into a slight grin.

“You’re just so sure of yourself, aren’t you?” You laughed.

“Sure enough to know that pretty pussy is just soakin’ your underwear right now,” he drawled.

He grabbed your hips, pinning you to his chest with an arm braced around your back. Dipping his hand between your bodies, he slid a finger over the seam of your zipper, teasing your already throbbing clit. Your eyes fluttered shut at the feather-like touch of his finger, your body aching for him.

“Fuckin’ knew it,” he whispered in your ear.

Your breath hitched as he popped open the button on your jeans and tugged down the zipper. Slipping two fingers between your skin and underwear, he drew lazy circles over your clit, watching you with rapt attention as you tried to stifle a moan.

“Mhmm,” he crooned. “Been dreamin’ ‘bout this pussy ever since you left town, darlin’.”

“Yeah?” you exhaled, rolling your hips against his fingers as they worked faster.

“Ain’t ever had my cock so wet.” Joel pressed a kiss against your neck as his fingers slid between your wet folds and teased your entrance.

“Christ, Joel,” you exhaled. “Maybe we should take this somewhere else.”

Joel glanced around the empty waiting room and shrugged.

“No one’s here, darlin’.”

“Your shop windows are glass,” you argued. “Anyone can see us if they drive by.”

Teasing your wet folds, Joel slid a finger inside you, slowly curling it in an attempt to shut you up—which did work, unfortunately. You leaned into his broad chest, your head resting on his sternum as he continued the movement in slow strokes.

“Joel,” you whimpered, clutching the fabric of his shirt.

“What, babydoll?” He asked innocently as if he didn’t fucking know what he was doing to you.

“Take me to the garage,” you breathed. “Please.”

“Only ‘cause you asked so nicely, darlin’.”

Pulling his hand out of your jeans, Joel bent to scoop you up, drawing your legs around his waist to carry you out of the waiting room. You wound your arms around his neck, dipping your head down to kiss along the stubble of his jawline. His hands squeezed your ass as he walked you both through the door to the garage, situating himself at the workbench. Still positioned in his lap, you wasted no time and pulled him in for a long, passionate kiss. You could feel the smile on his lips as he kissed you back, his hands roaming up and down your body as you devoured one another.

“Jesus, babydoll. Y’really did miss me, huh?” he muttered against your open mouth.

“Maybe I did, cowboy.”

Grinding your hips on his lap, you felt the strain of his cock beneath the worn-out fabric of his work jeans. Joel nipped at your bottom lip, groaning as you circled your hips harder.

“Easy now, darlin’,” he warned. “Don’t wanna ruin my jeans like some middle school boy.”

You laughed and doubled down on your movements against his cock, each drag of your body forcing him to tense up. Joel’s hand came up to cup your breast through your bra, squeezing hard enough to make you whimper.

“Y’gonna be a good girl for me, babydoll?” he questioned.

You snuck a glance at his face, seeing his pupils blown wide with lust. Nodding quietly, you stilled your movements and focused on the feel of his fingers pinching your hardened nipple through the fabric. Your jaw went slack as he toyed with you, coaxing humiliating sounds from your lips with each twist.

“Hmm,” he mused, leveling you with a dangerous stare. “That's how I get you to behave, huh?”

“Joel,” you whined breathlessly.

“Use your words, babydoll.”

“I need you to fuck me,” you begged, leaning into his touch.

“Where’s those manners, darlin’?” he taunted.

Giving him the biggest pouty face you could muster, you pushed your bottom lip out and sealed the deal by batting your eyelashes at him.

“Please, cowboy?”

Joel rolled his eyes and chuckled, bringing his hand down on your ass to deliver a sharp slap. Hoisting you back up, Joel spun your body back against the wall of the garage, shoving your shirt up as he pressed you against it. He wasted no time in dragging down your bra, ravishing your skin with kisses and bites, leaving a trail of marks down your breast and sternum. You ran your hands through his curls, feeling the humidity of the air dampen them the longer you both stayed in the garage. Neither of you seemed to mind, though; you were so wrapped up in each other there was no telling of what was happening in the outside world.

He took your nipple between his teeth, biting it softly and rewarding your behavior with another trail of kisses back up your chest and neck. He mumbled a slew of curses under his breath as you mewled against his touch, his mouth hot against the underside of your jaw.

“Quite the mouth on you, cowboy,” you teased.

“Y’already know what this mouth can do, darlin’. Don’t tempt me.”

“Why don’t you remind me?” you asked, a smug grin teasing your lips.

“Fuck, babydoll,” he groaned.

Setting you back down on your feet, Joel nodded towards his black truck, silently instructing you to move. With the truck bed already down, you did a little hop and shimmy onto it, settling back against the warm metal. Joel grabbed a clean towel off his workbench and stalked towards you with a devilish grin.

“Afraid to get your truck messy?” You smirked.

“I already know you’re gonna have the entire bed of it soaked in damn near a minute,” he responded.

Letting impatience get the best of you, you worked yourself out of your jeans and underwear, slingshotting it directly at Joel’s chest as he neared the edge of the truck. Catching it with one hand, he pocketed the black lace effortlessly, offering you the towel to situate yourself onto. Sliding your body into the towel, you dropped your legs open, giving Joel a perfect view to ogle at.

“Like what you see, cowboy?” You giggled, trailing your fingers down your abdomen and towards the wetness between your thighs.

“Damn right I do, darlin’.”

Joel pressed up against the truck bed, bending over to kiss down your stomach where your hand laid against your aching clit. He brushed his lips over your fingers before drawing them into his mouth, sucking on them gently. Your breath hitched as your eyes connected, his brown eyes sparkling with mischief. Joel pulled your fingers from his mouth and guided your hand through his hair.

“Give them curls a tug if y’need it, darlin’.”

Then his mouth was on you. Devouring you. Lapping at you. Every flick of his tongue sent shockwaves through your body, your veins coursing with an indescribable need to explode. Joel didn’t let up for a single second, his tongue and jaw working at you until your thighs quaked around his neck. He was pushing you closer and closer until that coil inside your stomach was ready to snap. You cried out as he flattened his tongue against your clit, putting pressure at just the right spot to make you see stars.

“Right there… oh my God, Joel,” you whispered, panting as you felt that build-up in your body begin.

With another long draw of his tongue and the brush of his nose against the sensitive bud of your clit, that coil snapped. Hot, warm liquid gushed out of you, covering the entirety of his open mouth and chin. Joel groaned as he continued lapping at you, the disgusting sound of your wet cunt drowning out the heartbeat thudding in your ears. Aftershocks of your orgasm coursed through you, your body pulsing with pleasure with each press of his mouth against you.

You tugged at his curls as he instructed, and Joel lifted his face to reveal what a dripping mess he had become. Your cheeks reddened at the sight of his hooded eyes and wild smile; the look of sheer bliss painting his features. Exhaling, you sagged against the metal of the truck, your chest rising and falling as you tried to regain some semblance of control.

“God, I sure did miss this pussy,” Joel hummed, nudging his nose against your dripping cunt.

You squirmed against his face, too afraid another orgasm would surge through you and drench him again—which he obviously wouldn’t be opposed to. But you needed his cock buried inside you, now.

“Joel, climb up here,” you said, patting the metal beside you.

“What if I ain’t ready yet?” he argued, kissing the inside of your thighs.

“Joel,” you demanded.

“Alright, alright,” he sighed. “Don’t get all impatient on me now, darlin’.”

Hauling himself onto the truck bed, he crawled over your limp body, kissing up the side of your neck. Using what little strength you had left, you maneuvered yourself over him, flipping you both until you straddled his lap. Joel’s hands came up to your bare hips, his thick fingers squeezing and kneading the supple flesh as you rolled against his hardened cock.

“Gonna let me ride you, cowboy?” You asked.

“Fuck, darlin’,” he groaned, his eyes rolling back. “Boutta be the best ride of my goddamn life.”

Giving him a wink, you hurried to undo his belt and jeans, letting his cock spring free. Christ, you forgot how big it was. Joel chuckled at the way you stalled a moment, bucking his hips upwards in an attempt to get you moving.

“Calm down, cowboy,” you warned. “I’m gettin’ there.”

Wrapping your hand around the base of his cock, you positioned it at your entrance, slowly sinking down until your clit brushed against the curls at the base. Even dripping wet, you were forced to stretch around him, the fullness leaving you breathless for a moment.

“Y’look so pretty like that, babydoll. S’fuckin full of me,” Joel hummed.

You whimpered at his words, moving your hips up and down finding the right tempo that sent you both into oblivion. The press of your knees against the metal wasn’t the most comfortable thing, but you could ignore it so long as he enjoyed himself. You picked up the pace, your body bouncing up and down as you forced his cock deeper inside you. Joel’s jaw went slack as he watched you, enraptured with the way you moved above him. Your bodies slapped together with each drop of your hips, and his fingers flexed against your waist as he pushed and pulled your body until you were grinding against him.

“There ya’ go, babydoll,” Joel murmured. “Feel how deep I am?”

You only gave him a pathetic moan, letting his hands guide your body as you pulsed around his cock. You were so fucking full, the tip of his cock spearing up into you with each drag of your hips. Snaking a hand down your body, your fingers found your clit, drawing desperate circles as you tried to chase the orgasm threading through your muscles.

“Fuck,” Joel groaned. “You’re just desperate to cum again, huh?”

“Yes, Joel,” you whined, putting more pressure on your clit as he drove himself deeper.

“S’fuckin’ pretty like that,” Joel exhaled. “Gonna drench me again, huh? Let’s see it, babydoll, cover me with it.”

Your mouth opened with a soundless cry, your cunt flexing around his cock as another orgasm ruptured through you, soaking your thighs and seeping into his jeans. Hauling you down against his chest, Joel positioned his knees upward, pistoning his hips against yours at a violent pace.

“Fuck!!” You sobbed as more liquid gushed out of you, the strength of your orgasm amplified at this angle.

“Good fuckin’ girl. That’s it, c’mon,” Joel praised, his lips pressed against your ear. “Keep goin’, babydoll. I know y’can give me more.”

“I—I can’t!” You stammered.

Your orgasm wouldn’t let up, though. Joel’s cock drove into you with such force, that you continued soaking him over and over again despite your wailing protests. Joel continued praising you and talking you through each ripple of your orgasm, hushing you as you cried harder.

“Just like that, babydoll. Shh… Doin’ so fuckin’ good for me.”

Joel kept a brutal pace, wrecking into you as he chased his own release. His hips snapped up one final time before he was spilling into you with a choked groan falling from his lips.

Falling limp against his body, you stared at the sides of the truck bed with glazed eyes. Tremors still wracked through your body as you settled into his embrace, his hand rubbing soft circles over your shoulders. Craning his head to the side, Joel captured your lips in a soft kiss, his tongue dancing over yours slow and sweet.

“Doin’ alright, babydoll?” he asked, breaking away from your lips.

You nodded mindlessly, too blissed out to form words. Nestled into his body, you let your fingers wander up his bicep and over his shoulder. Joel placed a soft kiss at the crown of your head, his muffled words lost in your hair.

“Hmm?” You asked.

“S’nothing,” he whispered. “Just enjoyed the ride, that’s all.”

You rested your head on his sternum, giving him a questioning look.

“Sounded like you said something else,” you said, cocking a brow.

Joel huffed a laugh, his head falling back against the metal with a soft thud.

“I don’t know, darlin’. Guess I kinda like you.”

“Guess I kinda like you too, cowboy.”

Rolling off of him, you situated yourself against the side of the truck bed, resting your legs over his stomach. Joel’s hand kneaded into the tight muscles of your calves, working at the knots in your legs. His head leaned to the side to catch a glimpse at you, a smile breaking across his face.

“How long are y’staying in town?” he asked.

“I was only passing through,” you sighed.

His smile faltered a moment, that glimmer of hope flickering out in his eyes. Suddenly, the thought of leaving didn’t sound so nice.

“Why don’t y’stay the night?” he offered. “Got myself a big enough bed to sleep in, babydoll.”

“How much is it gonna cost me?” You teased, rubbing your foot over the softest part of his lower stomach.

“I’m thinkin’ a good blowjob,” he mused.

“Whatever you want, cowboy. Count me in.”

You spent a few moments in harmonious silence, basking in the circumstances’ simplicity. After a while, you found yourself climbing off the truck in search of your jeans and underwear. Joel worked his way down, too, stuffing his cock back into his pants and gathering the damp towel off the truck bed.

“You still have my underwear,” you grumbled, shaking out your jeans to slide into.

“And I’m gonna keep ‘em, darlin’,” Joel said, grabbing you by the waist to reel you in for a kiss. “Need me a lil’ souvenir.”

“You’re unbelievable,” you chuckled.

Foregoing underwear, you stuffed yourself back into your jeans and followed Joel to the passenger side of the truck, where he had the door already propped open for you. Helping you in, he reached over to secure your seatbelt, kissing your cheek softly before shutting the door and walking to the driver's side.

Turning the key in the ignition, Joel glanced over at you, his eyes roaming over your messy hair and rosy cheeks.

“Y’sure are beautiful, babydoll. Wish I could keep ya here,” he sighed.

You rested your chin in your hand, leaning over the center console.

“I don’t know, cowboy. Your negotiating skills are pretty damn good. Might talk me into staying with all those sweet words.”

“Oh yeah?” he perked up. “Y’know you still got a hefty bill to pay off.”

“Shit, you’re right,” you agreed. “I might have to stay a while to settle that debt.”

Joel cracked a smile, lifting up the console to haul you closer to him. Backing out of the garage, he navigated the truck onto the main road and towards wherever home was for him. Settling into his side, your fingers danced over the zipper of his pants as you waged your brows at him.

“Think I should start paying off that debt now?” You asked.

“I ain’t arguing with that, babydoll,” Joel grinned.

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfic #joel miller one shot #joel miller smut #joel miller x f!reader #mechanic!joel #joel x reader #tlou #tlou fanfiction #one shot #joel miller pre-outbreak

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obxsummer · 1 month ago

Text

overdrive // ghost of you

pairing: jj maybank x routledge!reader

summary: a guaranteed 5k payment turns into a diving mission that gives john b more stress than he needs, jj learns why he needs to take a safety stop, and despite being in the hospital, you're just happy to have some peace and quiet in your boyfriend's arms.

warnings: spoilers for s4 ep2, the usual obx kinda shit

navigation -- series masterlist

“Do you guys know anybody that’s been here, because I don’t?”

“Nope.”

“Sarah, you must know somebody that’s been here, right? I mean like all Kooks, they… they know each other.”

“Are you kidding me?”

You tuned out the rumored conversations of the group as John B drove the boat toward Goat Island, the location of which Genrette asked you all to meet to discuss the possible Blackbeard treasure. While the idea of getting back into this treasure hunt wasn’t one you enjoyed, it felt more normal than you anticipated.

The island looked like any other, but the amount of trees and greenery was in abundance compared to Kildare. You could see an older man waiting on the dock as you all got closer. The lack of upkeep made you shiver, knowing this likely wasn’t going to be very welcoming.

“This place is 200 years old and they still don’t have a road that doesn’t go underwater twice a day.”

You shifted in your seat as Pope and JJ grabbed the ropes to tie off, and your boyfriend greeted the man politely as they stood. Silence followed and the man continued to stare at all of you. “Welcome to Blackstone.”

You all shared awkward glances as he walked away without another word. JJ offered you his hand to climb out of the HMS Pogue, his palm shifting to rest on your back as the group moved forward to follow.

“So uh, what have you been digging?” Your boyfriend attempted to dissolve the awkward tension but wasn’t fairing well.

“Ditches.” The reply was hoarse and simple.

“Ditches,” JJ repeated, “At least it’s not graves.”

“All the same to me.”

You didn’t like the atmosphere that this visit was suddenly bringing and brought JJ’s hand to hold in your own. Something seemed creepy and off as if you were walking straight into a trap.

“Uh, so how long have you been working for Mr. Genrette?” John B continued.

The man you were following came to a pause in his walk, sparing a glance at the group of you over his shoulder. “As long as I can remember.”

Your path eventually went up a flight of stairs to a large white house before the man pointed you in that direction. JJ thanked him and continued to approach, dropping your hand in favor of using the door knocker to announce your arrival.

“Oh, just a little quick FYI, they drug you before they chop you up.”

You smacked JJ’s shoulder in annoyance, hating the way it settled in your spine with goosebumps. “You’re an ass.”

He held his hands up in defense. “I’m just saying, don’t eat or drink anything.”

“Not funny.”

“Yeah, guys. I think I’ve changed my mind about this one. I-I really don’t wanna be here,” Sarah voiced the thoughts that were running through your mind as you nodded in agreement, Kie echoing the statement.

You didn’t get a chance to make a run for it as the locks on the door began to click open, revealing another man in a white button-up with a sweater tied loosely around his neck. “Hi. I’m sorry to keep you waiting. It’s quite a big house and I’m… I’m afraid the servants have all gone. All except, uh, good old Demp. Just can’t seem to get rid of him. Uh, you must be the… the Pogues. The Great Seekers.”

John B tilted his head in skepticism. “Yeah, I.. I don’t know about that.”

“Oh, now, don’t you be modest. I’ve read of your adventures. It’s quite thrilling,” The man disregarded your brother’s hesitance. “Uh, come in, come in. I.. I’m the son-in-law. Chandler Groff. Wes was really, really hoping you’d show. He’s been waiting.”

JJ pulled your hand back in his as he stepped forward, letting you walk ahead of him before he shifted to hide you behind his back in case anyone jumped out. “Yeah, pleasure. JJ.”

The six of you walked into the next room, taking in the dreary scenery. Cobwebs covered every surface in the house, dripping off the lights and walls, making you question what actually went on there. It seemed like a staged haunted house, which honestly was worse than it being a real one.

“This place smells like dead bodies.”

You glared at your brother’s comment, hating that he was right. Nothing in this house eased your fears about this being a bad idea. Chandler led you into another room, this one containing a fireplace and the man you’d come to know as Wes Genrette.

“Come in, please, please. Warm yourselves by the fire,” He greeted and waved you all in the large study. There was no light besides the rays attempting to creep in the windows, casting the room in a cold atmosphere. “I apologize for dragging you all out here, but I… I don’t think I could speak about this in public. I know I mentioned Blackbeard, but I assure you all, my interest is not for treasure.”

The six of you scattered around the various seating options in the room. JJ was seated on the armrest of the chair you occupied; his hand warm on the back of your neck as he rubbed the skin softly. John B and Sarah were on your other side with Pope, Cleo, and Kiara across from you.

“My ancestor, Francis Genrette, was the British officer who caught and killed the notorious pirate.”

Pope shifted uncomfortably in his seat as he turned to face the older man. “Wait. Your… your direct ancestor?”

Wes nodded. “Mhm. Yes, unfortunately. After he’d beheaded Blackbeard, he killed the pirate’s wife, Elizabeth. And since then, for 300 years, generations of Genrettes have been haunted by Elizabeth’s ghost and have died violent deaths. Including my daughter, Larissa. Chandler’s wife.”

You glanced over where the mentioned individual was standing, noticing he seemed unphased by the story being played out. It did strike you oddly that he lived with his father-in-law, figuring that he would’ve had his own home with Larissa for their family.

“My daughter saw Elizabeth a week before she died,” Wes continued as he focused his gaze on the portrait of Larissa that was hung above the fireplace. “Now, I’ve had a visitation. So, I know I don’t have much time.”

John B cleared his throat as he pulled his attention away from the haunting painting. “Right, uh. So, we’re really sorry that happened to you, but what do you want from us?”

Wes nodded in understanding of the skepticism. “Of course. Let’s get down to business. Chandler.”

“We believe that we’ve found a way to break the curse on this family,” Chandler took up the explanation and he pointed to a piece of the painting of Elizabeth that showed a large amulet. “Right before she was murdered, Elizabeth begged Francis to retrieve from her husband’s ship a keepsake that he’d given her. Her most prized possession. An amulet. He denied the request and then murdered her. “

“But if we find that amulet, fulfilling Elizabeth’s last request, I believe it will break the curse that has haunted my family for over 300 years,” Wes said.

You weren’t fully convinced a necklace would magically make this all disappear; the whole situation reminded you too much of Limbrey and her need for the cross to cure her disease. It just didn’t seem feasible.

Kie must’ve been thinking the same as she spoke up, “Okay. Um… I’m sorry, where did you say that necklace thingy is?”

“Blackbeard’s last ship, the Adventure.”

“Perfect,” You mumbled quietly, knowing this was going to fly off the rails quickly, as did every treasure hunt you guys went after. Another underwater search? No thanks.

Chandler continued, “According to all records, the amulet was still on it when it was scuttled right off Goat Island.”

Pope nodded in understanding. “Right, yeah, but the Coast Guard excavated that site years ago,” He explained.

“The excavation team didn’t know what we know,” Mr. Genrette tried to reason. He handed Pope over a book, pointing out something in the tattered pages. “They didn’t have this. There’s a secret lockbox hidden behind the headboard in the captain’s chamber. Do you dive?”

“We dive. All… all of us do,” JJ lied before anyone had a chance to disagree. You pinched his knee softly in warning. “It’s just, we only do it if the price is right.”

Wes didn’t seem upset by the comeback. “Excellent. We are prepared to offer you a premium for your services. Fifty thousand, plus expenses. Five thousand up front. And we would very much like your immediate answer.”

John B thankfully moved before JJ had a chance to open his mouth again. “We just need to think it through. We’ll be right back.” He grabbed the shoulder of your boyfriend’s shirt, nearly dragging him out of his seat to another room with the rest of you quickly following.

“What was that!”

“We have to think.”

“This is weird,” You echoed Kie and Sarah’s statements. “I mean it sounds like Limbrey 2.0, no? I don’t like it. We can just slip out the back.”

John B paced behind the couch. “Are we really going to listen to the guy who should be in a white padded room? Visitations? Curses?”

“He’s a madman!” Cleo agreed.

“Obviously, he’s batshit, but he’s in there crying about his daughter. Like, he needs help,” Sarah tried to reason.

Kie shook her head. “He needs therapy, not a necklace thing. We cannot ignore the fact that there is a ghost and a curse. Y’all aren’t getting weird ass vibes?”

“Okay. Guys.” Cleo pulled the conversation back in. “Let’s just say we take this job. Is it even possible?”

“Yes,” JJ’s voice was monotone as he responded. You shook your head at him, knowing it probably was, but you didn’t want to find out.

“I knew what you would say,” Cleo dismissed him, knowing he was eager to get any and all money. “Everybody else?”

With a soft groan, you ran your hands across your face. “I don’t like it.”

“That ship is probably 80-100 feet down. The currents are probably ripping.”

“Guys,” JJ whispered harshly, “Are we really gonna worry about the details right now?”

A resounding “Yes!” followed his question.

JJ shook his head, looking at all of you as if the answer was obvious. “In our time of need, are we really gonna turn down free money? No! That’s not like us.”

“It’s not free!” You argued back as you made eye contact with him. “Babe-”

“The worst that can happen is we walk out of here with 5 Gs in our pocket. End of discussion.”

“That’s not the worst!

“We could go to jail, we could die, we could-”

JJ seemingly ended the discussion for everyone as he ignored the concerns and walked back to the room where Wes and Chandler were waiting. “Sir, we’ve come to our conclusion, and we’ll do it. We’ll take the job.”

A deep sigh left your mouth, your forehead dropping to Sarah’s shoulder in frustration at JJ’s willingness to throw your group into danger. Pope intercepted JJ’s attempts at taking the initial 5k payment as Wes and Chandler thanked you all graciously.

Chandler reached out to grab JJ’s shoulder. “Hey, JJ. I believe in you.”

You stared at the awkward moment, listening as JJ thanked him before moving back to you, grabbing your hand to lead the group out of the house. You risked looking over your shoulder to see the creepy smile on Chandler Groff’s face as he watched your group disappear from view.

Looking up at your boyfriend as you made it out, you could tell he was a little thrown off guard. “Jayj?”

“I’m fine, baby,” His response was quiet as he tried to convince you before plastering a convincing smile back on his face. “Let’s go, y’all! We got work to do.”

JJ’s whole mood had taken a turn with the five grand in hand, and the plan in place on the dive. What Wes had said was lining up with the information in the captain’s log, to your dismay. You were kind of hoping on the trail to end cold and avoid JJ diving into wreckage in the first place.

While the boys, Kie, and Cleo took the liberty of attempting to find more info on the location of the wreck, you and Sarah managed the store in the meantime. You were restocking and organizing the surrounding items while Sarah took the register.

“Good afternoon, ladies.” A stern voice broke you from your routine as you looked over. You quickly recognized the man as the one who kept going head-to-head with JJ on the auction for the house, and he didn’t look like he was here to be nice. “Y’all remember me?”

“How could we forget?” Your tone was sickly sweet but you let the sarcasm sink in. Walking behind the counter, you stopped next to Sarah and placed your fingers on the switchblade Cleo left under the register in a safety precaution.

The man nodded and slid a paper toward Sarah. “Hmm, like that attitude. No wonder Cameron liked to keep you around. I’ve got something for you here. I can take this place off your hands at any time. For a fair price.”

Sarah chuckled softly. “I don’t think that’s necessary. But can we offer you a keychain? Maybe a… glass bong, a pipe? You look like you need one.”

He looked away to not face the two of you as if he was assessing your work so far. “You know, y’all are gonna lose this place. You might as well sell now.”

You rolled your eyes and motioned toward the dock where he came. “Whatever you said, old man. And you can tell Cameron to kiss my ass if he comes asking.”

Sarah picked up the paper, her eyes moving quickly as she skimmed it before holding it out. You glanced at her expression and took it, instantly clocking the Public Notice, Change of Zoning.

“My dad used to do that all the time. It’s changing the zoning, it’s a way to force owners out of their property.”

You groaned and set it down. “Pope went through hell to get it changed in the first place. How can they change it back?”

“If someone’s got the money to do it, what’s it matter?”

“What are we gonna tell the others?” Your voice dropped to a whisper as you looked at her, the realization sinking in that this would cost more than you could account for, even with the fronted 5k.

She shrugged and shook her head. “I don’t know.”

You read the paper fully, wishing there was some form of hope to find hidden in the language but came up empty-handed. “We’ll tell JB first. He’ll know what to do.”

Sarah didn’t say anything but you could feel her chin rest on your shoulder before you dropped yours to lean against her. This was just another nail in the coffin that the world seemed to be building around your family.

And it was getting really hard to feel like they weren’t winning.

“My lady.”

You laughed as JJ tossed a blanket over your face, his warm body climbing in the hammock next to yours with a rough shove. Pulling the fabric away from your eyes, you were met with his crystal blue ones staring right back.

“Hi.”

It took less than two seconds for him to kiss you, the movement rough and warm. You hummed at his action, loving the way he seemed to know exactly how to hold you and bring butterflies to your stomach every time.

Fingers slipped into his hair, gently pulling the blond strands when he bit down on your lip with a soft gasp, everything heating with each second. JJ’s leg slipped between yours as you leaned up to chase his lips before the hammock moved sharply, threatening to throw the two of you to the ground.

“Okay, okay,” You giggled as he shifted his weight back down, wet kisses on your neck coming shortly after. “They will kill us if they catch us out here again.”

“We need our own place then.”

You huffed, pulling his head awake from your neck where he was starting something he couldn’t finish. “As much as I would love to do this right now, we have to talk about the dive.”

JJ groaned loudly in faux annoyance and dropped his weight on you completely like a slug. “Why can’t we just have sex and figure it out later?”

“Because Sarah already heard us last night and I’m trying to save you from John B if it happens again,” You explained with a smile before kissing his forehead. “Come on. Please.”

“Fine, fine.” He looked up at you with full attention. “What about the dive?”

You studied his face for a second, wondering how after all these years he still looked at you like you put the stars in the sky despite everything the two of you had gone through. “I wanna go with you.”

His response was instant, “No.”

“I wasn’t asking,” You shot back sternly. “You’re not going alone. I won’t let you.”

JJ brushed the hair out of your face gently and shook his head. “Sweetheart, it’s 80 feet down in the dark and moving through structures.”

You smirked at him. “Exactly, and that’s why you’ll need backup and I’m going.”

He sighed and dropped his head to your chest, mumbling something you couldn’t quite hear.

“Hmm?”

“I said your brother is going to kill me.”

A bubble of laughter escaped you at the thought of John B flipping his shit, which he would when you told him. You rubbed JJ’s back gently as the sunset dipped behind the skyline, nighttime beginning to make its appearance. “Come on babe, where you go, I go, remember? Includes bottom of the ocean.”

“Okay, now when you say it like that, it sounds really bad,” He grumbled and took your hand in his, squeezing it lightly. “Yeah, okay. I don’t like it but you’re gonna do it anyway. But if John B says no, I’m not arguing with him.”

You rolled your eyes, “You won’t have to. I’ll handle it. You just gotta look pretty and make sure I don’t get the bends.”

“I’ve bent your ass over before and-”

“JJ!”

The next morning, you made your way out to the shop where Sarah usually drank her morning coffee. The two of you didn’t sleep well with anxiety of the night ahead and you stayed up into the late hours trying to figure out how to deal with the zoning issue.

“Hey,” You whispered as you pulled JJ’s zip up closer over your chest and approached her. The morning chill was starting to set in, causing you to shiver.

Sarah glanced over her shoulder, a Kildare Surf Co. mug held tightly in her grasp to warm her fingers. “Couldn’t sleep?”

You shook your head no and leaned on the railing next to her, the two of you soaking up the sunrise and calm water. Times like this were so peaceful and grounding that you appreciated them more than the eye could tell. It was a reminder that each day was a brand new start despite how the last one ended.

“What are you two doing up?” John B found you faster than you anticipated, his Converse quiet on the wood compared to his usual rowdy steps. He still looked half asleep in his long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants, his hair unruly as he gave Sarah a soft greeting kiss.

He moved to you next with a kiss on the forehead and a hug you refused to pull away from. John B always gave the best hugs. They were warm and a safe space for you, more than he had ever been in the previous years. The protectiveness had gotten stronger with the knowledge that your dad really wasn’t coming back and at the end of the day, all you would have is each other.

“You okay?” He asked quietly, palm holding your head to his chest when you tightened your grip after a few moments.

“I’ve gotta talk to you.”

He whistled lowly. “Don’t like the sound of that first thing in the morning.”

Sarah pulled the folded paper out from her hoodie pocket to hold it toward him. John B let go of you to take it, his eyes scanning the words before he let out a soft, “Shit.”

“The guy who tried to outbid us at the auction stopped by yesterday,” Sarah explained as she crossed her arms over her chest, shifting to face the two of you with her back to the railing. “He dropped it off, and said we’ll lose everything.”

John B shook his head and folded the paper back up. “Does anyone else know?”

“Just us. Pope’s going to freak out,” She replied, stepping toward your brother to lean into his side. “I’m sorry, I don’t know-”

“Hey, hey, hey,” John B shushed her and pulled her closer. “We’re gonna figure it out. It’s not the best thing to start the morning with but…”

You kicked your shoes into the wood. “Yeah, I’m about to make it worse. I’m diving with JJ.”

“No, absolutely not.”

You rolled your eyes, repeating what you’d told JJ yesterday. “John B, I’m not asking. I’m telling you.”

“Did he put you up to this?” He tossed his hands out to the side, motioning toward the house. “Because I’ve told him-”

“JB, stop,” You interrupted whatever rude thing was about to come out of his mouth. “No, JJ didn’t put me up to it. He’s not happy about it either, but it’s my decision. I’m not letting him go down there alone.”

John B shook his head in disagreement. “Then I’ll go. Or Pope can, it doesn’t have to be you.”

“Pope knows exactly where the wreckage is and I don’t steer the boat as well as you.”

“Kie, then.”

You tilted your head to the side. “Oh, so Kie’s allowed to but I’m not?”

John B groaned and shoved his hands to his face. “You’re making this really difficult.”

“It’s not your decision. And there may not be anything down there anyway, so quit worrying about it until there’s something to worry about,” You tried your best not to sound angry toward him, knowing he had your interests in mind. “John B, please let me help.”

Sarah placed her hand on his shoulder. “She’ll be fine. If anything, it’s going to keep JJ’s mind on safety, which is a good thing, okay?”

John B kept his eyes on you. You could practically see the thoughts moving behind his eyes, thinking if there was any way to talk you out of it, but he came up empty.

Which led you here, to you and JJ slipping on wetsuits while John B and Pope navigated and Sarah, Cleo, and Kie kept an eye out from land. You hissed as JJ’s fingers skimmed your back to zip up the material, sending shivers down your spine with the coolness.

“Sorry, sorry,” He apologized before helping you lift the BCD and remaining gear on. “Honestly, it’s kind of like surfing the point, you know. We’re upstream, and then the rip is just gonna… take us out.”

Mumbled agreements came from Pope and John B, none of them convincing in the slightest. You glared at the three boys. “You guys are not helping my nerves.”

“Okay, then take the wetsuit off and-”

You smacked John B’s shoulder, knowing he still wasn’t happy about the situation. “If I got JJ to shut up, you can too. Come on.”

“Don’t forget your safety stop,” Pope reminded as JJ loaded the speargun he insisted on taking. “Fifteen feet for three minutes. Hear that, JJ? Fifteen feet, three minutes.”

“Yeah, copy that.” The reply was direct as he pulled his goggles to his forehead. JJ’s attention shifted to you as you got to your feet and he reached out to grab your shoulder. “Hey, you good?”

You tried your best to keep the worry off your face and nodded. “Yeah, let’s do it.”

The water was colder than you expected, and the water was so, so dark. The underwater lights did a little to help but it still was dim unless you were on something. You followed JJ’s lead further down, feeling the pressure begin to set in as the depth increased.

To your shock, the flashlight hit an algae-covered figure that belonged at the front of a pirate ship. You didn’t think you would find it this fast, let alone that it would be real. Your gaze met JJ’s the excitement seeping in as the two of you moved forward to where Pope said would be best to enter.

Fish and sand flew in every direction as you moved water around while swimming, the sight almost beautiful if it wasn’t deadly too. JJ quickly found the door to shift, pushing inside the area that would lead to the Captain’s Quarters where the secret compartment was above the headboard.

You reached forward to push on the stone that had grown over time until you found a soft spot that shifted. Using Cleo’s knife to dig it out, you reached inside to feel for the supposed treasure that was supposed to be there.

JJ called your name and moved his light away, bringing what looked like a fresh set of tools into view. Which could only really mean one thing: someone else was down here.

You didn’t have time to think before the back of your neck was grabbed harshly, pulling you further down in the water and disorienting your entire body. Attempting to scream was nearly impossible with the mouthpiece as you kicked and shoved against the person who had grabbed you and pushed you out of JJ’s view.

The faint sounds of him yelling for you were barely there as you tried to get your bearings back. You caught a glimpse of his flashlight and began to move in that direction when hands grabbed your waist again and yanked backward.

“Let go!” You tried to yell, lashing back with your elbow and Cleo’s knife in an attempt to defend yourself. Things only got worse when your oxygen supply was stolen, the mouthpiece ripping away with the guy’s force as something cut along your arm. You caught sight of him swimming away but were hit with the harsh reality that your source of air was gone, left only with the deep breath you managed to steal.

Panic set in quickly, sending you into survival mode as you did your best to swim to wear JJ was last seen. Noises helped guide and you could make out him using debris to break the worn structure and free himself. Your lungs burned with the lack of oxygen and you were starting to believe you wouldn’t even make it to him before passing out.

“Hey, hey.” His voice was hardly recognizable before he lunged forward, placing the emergency mouthpiece in your grasp for air to flood your lungs. “You okay? We gotta go. We gotta go.”

You caught the faint beeping signal that warned JJ’s air supply was almost out as he started guiding the two of you back to the surface. Your brain was still in survival mode and the only thing you wanted to do was get the hell out of the water as soon as you could.

The second the water broke away, you dropped the mouthpiece JJ had provided and gasped for air. He coughed aggressively behind you, the two of you reaching out for each other in relief that you had made it back.

“Oh my god, shit. Are you okay?” His hands reached out for you in search of immediate injuries.

“Yeah, yeah,” You choked on water and ripped the mask from your head to see him clearly. “Who the hell was that? And where’s John B?”

There was so much fog you couldn’t see and your flashlights had been lost in the fight to escape so JJ yelled out for your brother until you caught sight of the boat. Pope quickly tossed the ladder over as John B reached out for you.

“Hey, hey, hand me your stuff. Where’s your BCD?” He asked as he grabbed your elbows and lifted you out of the water like it was the easiest thing ever.

You hit the floor of the boat relatively hard, still heaving for air in your lungs. “It’s gone.”

“What do you mean it’s gone?”

“I mean it’s gone!” It came out more aggressive than you meant for it to. “There’s a guy that tried to kill us!”

John B immediately tried to pull the remaining gear and wetsuit off you as Pope explained the boat that was up here, confirming your story. Your brother wrapped your shoulders in his lightweight shirt and ran to start the engine, pushing the boat back in the direction of home.

“You guys okay?” Pope asked as he watched JJ collapse down next to you. The only answer he received was a thumbs up from your boyfriend, the two of you still coming down from the adrenaline rush.

The drive back was a blur and thankfully, you were back on land with your friends before you had time to even process what had just happened.

“Someone tried to kill us,” You echoed again when John B repeated his question. You kept your head against the seat, trying to clear the fog from your brain that didn’t seem to go away as you took deep breaths. It had been a good 15 minutes back and you still couldn’t seem to shake it.

“What? Why? That doesn’t make sense. Why would someone try to kill you?”

“Obviously, they were going after the same thing we were, right?”

You groaned as they continued to talk. There was a searing pain making its way through your body and no matter how much you tried to focus on their words, you couldn’t. Sarah’s face was suddenly in front of you, her hands on your cheeks. You could see her mouth moving but couldn’t hear her voice.

John B was quickly next to you, his arms grabbing your waist alongside Sarah before you were being moved without another word. Blurry sights eventually told you that the group was in the Twinkie, and there was so, so much yelling, but you couldn’t catch it enough to ask what was going on.

“Ow, shit,” You groaned and curled into a ball against Kiara’s side, willing the pain to go away if you coiled small enough. Turning to her, you blinked a few times to steady your sight before speaking, “Hey, guess what?”

“Just hold on, we’re almost there,” She pleaded, eyes watching you with concern.

You shifted as much as you could, whimpering with the movement as you managed to get your hand in the swim shorts you’d been wearing to pull out the heavy-weight item in your palm.

“You found it?” Sarah’s voice sounded so loud in your head as she grabbed the balled towel from your grip. “Holy shit.”

“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?” John B asked as he looked over as best as he could while driving.

You coughed painfully and flipped him off, “Too busy dying, Booker.”

Cleo praised your efforts, calling you a rockstar and every other achievement in the book but you couldn’t hear over the noises that were setting in your skull. Every movement felt like an attack on your skin as your friends lifted you and JJ from the car into what you assumed was the hospital.

John B’s arm was tight around your waist as he and Cleo carried your weighted form. Your brother informed the hospital staff everything you couldn’t hear and the next thing you knew, you were surrounded by red lights and metal with JJ’s body next to you.

A pained whimper left your throat as you collapsed against the mattress that was beneath you, curling into your side again to try and disappear from it all. JJ’s own sounds of distress were hurtful to hear so you forced yourself to turn over to see him. Every muscle in your body felt like it was on fire, but you managed to grab his hand in yours, squeezing it tightly.

“I got you,” You whispered quietly as the room darkened and quieted. It took a few minutes but everything seemed to slow down. Your muscles were still tense and cramping, but you could hear and see better than 15 minutes ago, which was a plus.

JJ’s breathing evened out, and even though you were sure he was sleeping, you refused to take your hand out of his. You caught movement in your peripheral and shifted to see your brother standing in the doorway, watching you carefully.

A coil smile tugged your lips as you flipped him off with your free hand, which was easily returned by him. His mouth moved slow enough for you to read out “I love you, dumbass” before he disappeared from your vision and you fell into the best sleep of your life.

It was hard to tell how much time had passed that you lay there with JJ, the two of you breathing softly. You swore your heart was beating too loud that he could hear it, but you were just relieved to have your body back to yourself.

A nurse had come by not too long ago to explain the effects of the nitrogen in your blood and how the treatment process would go from there. You tried your best to listen, but your head was so heavy and exhausted that it was difficult.

“Babe.”

You hummed in response to JJ’s whisper, your eyes still closed as you rested against his chest. His heartbeat was steady in your ear, a reminder that the two of you were still here together and would be okay.

“You almost died.” You shifted slightly to look at him, twisting your leg between his to get impossibly closer, and pushed up on your hands to see him fully. His eyes were wet, and he looked so, so stressed. “I should’ve never let you go down there.”

A small smile graced your lips as you leaned down to kiss his forehead. “Then who would’ve saved your life?”

“Technically, I saved your life so-“

“Okay,” You laughed quietly and settled back against him, pressing another kiss to his jawline. “We both saved each other, yeah?”

His hands were warm as they curled around your bare shoulder to hold you, the two of you a mess of tangled limbs and love inside the small space you were given. “Would’ve never forgiven myself if you didn’t make it out of there.”

“I told you, where you go, I go,” You mumbled into his chest. “That includes tiny ass hyperbaric chambers, too.”

A small laugh left his lips before he kissed you, humming at the sensation it always gave him when you were soft like this. He loved nothing more than sharing moments so sweet and comforting with you. Like you were a calm in the storm that was always ready to strike.

“You know, we’re in here for twelve hours,” You hinted as you looked up into his gaze. “You got anything to do?”

He followed your insinuation and smiled like he had just won the lottery. “Oh, sweetheart. Have I told you I love you lately?”

Hours passed in heated kisses, soft touches, and shared giggles as you and JJ loved each other back to life. It was easy to tell when he wanted more, but you refused to share that part of him in a shitty hospital of all places, despite how much he pleaded with you.

Nurses spewed hospital talk left and right as you tried to enjoy your last few minutes of peace in JJ’s arms. Your time together was almost up, twelve hours turning into 30 minutes before you knew it and part of you was sad to leave it all. As much as you hated confined spaces and hospitals both, you loved having no distractions between you and JJ. It wasn’t often the two of you had the privacy to be vulnerable with each other, especially in a house with siblings and friends, so this was your slice of heaven for the time you had it.

“Hey,” JJ mumbled, pulling you out of your almost-nap. “Babe, wake up. Hey, look at me.”

You shifted lazily, not expecting to be woken up so suddenly but the panic in his voice snapped you out of it. “What? What’s wrong?”

He was frantic as he leaned above you. “There was a guy in the hall just now. I think it was the guy, the dude from the wreck. He-he had a wound right where I got him underwater with the spear gun-“

“Did he see you?” You attempted to get him to focus, to which he nodded. “Great, so he knows we’re here.”

“We gotta get out.”

You sighed and flopped back against the pillows, “Jayj, we have like 10 minutes. Just don’t make a scene and-“

“Ma’am! Miss!” His hand smacked against the window facing the hallway as he attempted to get someone’s attention.”

“JJ!” You grabbed his arm to stop the loud noise as he tried to tell the nurse who the man was and why you needed out. You managed to shove JJ away from the window that he was prepping to kick out. “Hey! Chill!”

The nurse seemed to notice the two of you were in distress and walked closer to hear better. “Just give me like 90 seconds and we’ll get you out, okay?”

“Hey!” He protested and stumbled back to look at you with a panic in his eyes.

You grabbed his face to focus his attention. “Babe, 90 seconds, okay. If we kick the window out, it’s gonna cause a scene and Shoupe will be on our ass, okay? 90 seconds.”

JJ groaned loudly and leaned against the metal wall behind him. The need to fight had him tense, every muscle in his body telling him to run and take you with him no matter what. You knew it had a lot to do with his dad. The first sign of danger made him anxious and jumpy and the quicker he could get everyone to safety, the better.

What didn’t help was him yelling the second the nurse let you both out, shouting about the man in the room next door who tried to kill the two of you.

“JJ!” You reached after him as he moved toward the hallway, barely giving you time to crawl out.

“I’m going to buy you some time, meet me outside!”

You didn’t have a second to argue as he started yelling at the nurses about being left in the chamber too long. Security moved in quickly after in an attempt to calm him down and you watched, horrified, as they started to take him outside.

“I’m gonna file a formal complaint!” He yelled, managing to make eye contact with you as he did. “Okay? File a formal complaint!”

You caught on to his emphasis and cursed under your breath. In his defense, he managed to make enough of a scene that a few patients spilled into the hallway, one male with a bandage on his arm included which gave you the answer you were looking for.

Moving as unsuspiciously as you could, you slid into the room across from the chamber you’d been in. The first thing you caught sight of was the amount of bloody bandages and you quickly turned away from them to focus on the area of the room that wasn’t contaminated.

“File, file, file,” Your voice was low as you searched for any sign of the paper but came up empty-handed. “Shit.”

Figuring the nurse’s station was the next best bet, you started your path there, trying to look like a visitor in a place you most certainly stood out from in your swim shorts, top, and John B’s floral shirt. Thankfully, JJ was still causing enough trouble that you were able to spot the wound picture from the pile of papers and snatch it from the desk, quickly tucking it into your chest and making your way to the exit.

“Guys!” You caught sight of Heyward’s truck, Cleo and Pope sitting inside expectantly for you and JJ, and started running in their direction.

“What’s the rush, girl? Where’s your man?” Cleo popped her head out the window to get a closer look at you.

You didn’t spare the time to answer and stepped on the back tire to push yourself into the bed of the truck. “JJ’s coming, just drive!”

Pope didn’t hesitate to put the car in gear and take off down the exit road from the hospital. Thankfully, JJ must’ve thought the same idea and was coming out the side entrance, down the hill. He spared no time and braced against the side of the truck to jump in before the vehicle even came to a stop.

“Are you okay?” Your question was left unanswered as he tumbled into the bed with no grace whatsoever. From first glance, he was unharmed, and you hoped that remained true.

“You guys know that guy that was down at the wreck and tried to kill us?” JJ rushed out as he spoke to Cleo and Pope through the open back window. “He was there!”

“At the hospital with you?” Pope questioned as he drove away from the building.

“Yes! He was getting stitched up where I got him in with the harpoon gun!”

You handed the file that you’d taken in for Cleo to read, wanting to spare yourself the images of his wound while knowing she had her head on straight unlike you from the adrenaline rush. She took it and scanned the information written.

“Cheese on bread. You two gonna get yourselves killed!”

navigation -- series masterlist

#outer banks x reader #outer banks #obx4 #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x you #jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #jj maybank x routledge!reader #routledge!reader #john b x sister!reader #jj maybank series #outer banks series

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daycourtofficial · 9 months ago

Text

Your Little Hand’s Wrapped Around My Finger

Summary: Based on this ask - you and Azriel present your new babe to the rest of the inner circle, with a surprise for Cassian.

Author’s note: Cassian is a male who is very aware of his emotions and lets them out

The inner circle was buzzing with excitement as they sat in your living room.

Your labor had no hold-ups, however it had been long and exhausting, and afterwards Azriel insisted on making you rest before seeing the rest of your family.

They all had been so concerned, but their worries eased when Azriel had sent Rhys a mental message saying:

Everything’s fine. They’re both doing well. Just tired. We’ll let you know when you can come visit.

The two of you had kept the sex of the babe a well-kept secret between you two, wanting to enjoy everyone’s surprise and amazement.

Rhysand had been going out of his mind with worry for his sister, but he knew Azriel would never lie to him about how you were.

Feyre and Rhysand helped you out of bed, her surprisingly strong arms holding you upright as they helped you to the couch. Rhys propped some pillows behind you, sitting on the arm of the couch next to you, and you leaned into his side, having missed him in the past few days. Everyone else began asking their own questions -

How are you?

How’s the babe?

How’s Az?

You try to answer their questions the best you can. “We’re all okay, rattled with nerves and we’re very tired, but we’re all happy. We have a very happy and healthy babe.”

Right on cue your mate comes into the room, your tiny babe bundled in a black blanket littered with stars.

Mor begins cooing and everyone else moves to crowd around, but Cassian sidesteps the crowd and comes over to sit next to you, putting his arm around you. He nuzzles his head on top of your own as he squeezes lightly.

“Proud of you, kid.”

You smile, “Cassian, don’t you want to see the babe?”

He looks at you, his eyes a little glossy with tears. “After Feyre’s uh, after Nyx, and you’re only half-Illyrian, and I was… I was worried I’d lose you.”

You start crying, hormones making it unbearable to see anyone else cry, sobs racking your body as you wrap your arms around Cassian and cry into his shoulder.

Everyone turns to the two of you, and Rhys says, “Cassian couldn’t make it five minutes without making her cry.”

You feel Cassian crying into your shoulder, causing you to sob out, “everything went well - I’m sorry I scared you!”

Cassian pulls away, looking towards the ceiling to dry his eyes. You realize that during yours and Cassian’s sob show everyone got to hold your babe, so you turn to Cassian, urging Az over.

“Cassian, do you want to hold our babe?”

He nods, a smile taking over his face.

Azriel gently places the babe in his brother’s arms, and Cassian can’t stop the tear that leaks out onto the babe’s face.

A head full of onyx hair, tiny eyes that are closed, and a nose that looks just like yours. He moves the blanket a little and peers at the tiny little wings adorning the babe’s back.

“It’s a girl,” you tell him, and Feyre and Mor melt into each other as they both coo, “a girl!”

“What’s her name?” Rhys asks, taking his place on your other side again.

“We wanted to give her a great name. A name to give her strength and to let her know how loved she is.”

You look at Cassian, his eyes fixated on the babe in his arms, “her name’s Cassie.”

Cassian looks over to you, then inhales sharply, “are you sure?” You nod, and Cassian looks back up to the ceiling to keep the tears from falling. He squeezes his namesake, holding her to his chest.

“Cassie,” he says, looking at her. “She looks just like her dad.” His fingers brush her little cheeks, and she reaches up, wrapping a tiny hand around his finger.

He closes his eyes, a few tears falling onto her blanket.

It was no secret how much Cassian loved you and Azriel - he cried several times in the lead up to your mating ceremony, sobbed through the ceremony itself, but somehow pulled himself together enough to give a speech that left everyone else crying.

No one laughs or makes a joke about Cassian’s emotional display. They all knew what this moment meant for him, the male who was practically bouncing off the walls waiting for you two to let him come meet his niece.

Rhysand looks at you, pride in his eyes as he says, “I can’t believe you named her after him - your brother is right here!”

“Well,” you say, looking at Azriel. He nods, letting you tell them, “we have named you and Feyre as her godparents, and I didn’t like the way Rhysanda sounded.”

Everyone laughs, and Rhysand leans over to give you a kiss on your temple, but Cassian doesn’t even pay attention, his eyes on the tiny babe in his arms. She was comically small, nestled into his massive chest.

His thoughts linger on his brother, about the atrocities he faced at such a young age, how Azriel deserved this happiness.

And how, despite all odds, he was able to find it.

#acotar fanfiction #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #azriel fluff #azriel x y/n #acotar writing

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katsukistofu · 4 months ago

Text

ikea meatballs before marriage?

contents ౨ৎ ⋆ touya todoroki x fem reader. fluff. cursing. slightly suggestive. ⭑ your fiancé and you get a little too into playing house when you’re supposed to be furniture shopping for your new apartment.

“you’re home early.” touya smirks. an apron you’re ninety-nine percent sure he stole from the aisle showcasing the ovens with ‘i cook as good as i look’ printed on it is tied around his waist.

“i’m home!” you say cheerfully, playing along with him.

you take a moment to study “your” kitchen and droop in disappointment.

it was a bit too dim for your liking, the lighting.

there’s no way you could read the recipe books rei had gifted you without touya having to stand there and hold a flashlight while you did.

but the deep forest green accented cabinets, reaching all the way to the ceiling, were beautiful.

perfect for storing fuyumi’s leftover snacks that her students gifted her yesterday.

she had complained to you over the phone about how there was no space at home since all the cupboards were full of soba noodles, courtesy of your fiancé and little brother-in-law.

touya nervously watches, until he sees as you visibly brighten up, and he lets a little huff out, half in pride, half in relief.

he knew his pick couldn’t be that bad.

then you spot the fake plant hanging from overhead, and grimace as you see a cluster of even more potted plants under it near the toaster.

cute in theory, but definitely a fire hazard.

touya notices the little way your eyebrows furrow with doubt, and casually leans against the edge of the sink to distract you from making any more keen observations.

you giggle at the way he almost knocks off the price tag on it in the process, too busy staring at you to bother noticing.

“how was work?” your favorite fire hazard asks, reaching out a hand to gently brush a stray lash you didn’t notice from your cheek.

your face always feels hotter than usual when touya pulls away, even after all this time.

“ugh, so exhausting,” you fan yourself a bit, let out an exaggerated sigh. “the printer blew up and got toner all over my clothes, can you believe it?”

“aw.” there’s a playful sparkle in his eyes as touya innocently frowns in sugary sweet sympathy. “want me to run a bath for you later?”

you can feel your cheeks start to burn. you just took one with him yesterday!

but of course you find yourself stuttering out, “oh, um sure.”

the memory of his fingers softly massaging your scalp as he helped you wash your hair. the gentlest of touches on your skin as he lathered you in suds, pressing a kiss to your forehead between rinses flood back to you.

you remember trying to wash his hair one time, but he quickly stopped you by trapping you in his lap, insisting that he wanted to do yours first. like he does during every bath he runs for you when you stay over at the todoroki house.

and he would take just as good care of you, your heart knows, in your cozy new apartment that was waiting for you back in shizuoka too.

not too far from home, so that everyone could still visit, but not too close either, so the both of you had your own space.

touya grins as a shy expression suddenly crosses over your face, knowing exactly what you’re thinking about.

with amusement, he watches as you reach over to set your purse on the white marble counter.

a pair of strong hands claim their usual spot on your waist, holding you in place, and then you’re pulled away until your back bumps against a familiar, firm chest.

“uh-uh, mrs. todoroki.” he murmurs softly in your ear. “i just cleaned that for you before you got home.”

your breath catches. mrs. todoroki?

“my bad,” is all you can manage to squeak out.

his nose tickles your cheek in response and you giggle at the feeling of his piercings, cold and soothing against your warm skin.

“so. what do you want for dinner today?” touya says, leaning over you to open the fridge. he scans its empty contents with a face so serious that you have to bite back a laugh.

“what do we have?”

“stale air—i mean,” touya coughs. “uh, salad.”

“that’s it? just salad?” you point an accusatory finger at him, and he snorts at the way you force your eyebrows to scrunch together to make an angry face. so cute.

“oh, you think this is funny? take that apron off right now, you big phony.”

“yes ma’am.” he laughs airily, reaching behind him to undo the tie when his hands stop.

touya turns to you with a pout. “can you do it for me? my fingers hurt from cooking and cleaning all day.”

he makes it so hard to stay mad at him, even as a joke.

you bite your lip to suppress the fond grin growing on your face, but it's too late, touya’s already seen it and he knows you’ll give into him soon enough.

“aw, my poor husband all alone in the house, cooking air and salad. it must’ve been so hard for you.”

he pouts even more. “it really was.”

the giggle you’ve been holding back finally spills from your mouth. he was ridiculous, and you loved him for it. “okay you big baby, i’ll untie it for you.” you move to stand behind him, hands reaching for the back of his waist to untie the neat bow he did for himself earlier.

“i think you mean your big strong husband.” touya leans his weight back into you.

not enough to hurt you or make you fall, but just enough to give you a hard time undoing the knot of his apron.

“sewing machine was acting up like crazy today, had to teach it some manners.”

“i’m sure you did.” you fight back another laugh, which turns into a whine as his broad back leans into your face even more.

“touya stop it! do you want this apron off of you or not?”

you can practically hear him smirk from in front of you.

“i’m okay with anything as long as it keeps your hands on me.”

you step away from him and he lets out a ‘oof!’ as his back thuds against the hard floor of the ikea showroom, taking down a fake plant with him.

touya is donning a new apron when the two of you find yourselves outside of another kitchen showroom.

“‘relax, i’ll feed you bitches.’ it read in bold.

you giggle hysterically as he stands there, hands on his hips and looking way too proud of his find, as you snap a pic to send to the groupchat with his siblings.

i’d rather eat poison, natsuo texts back.

his message is hearted by fuyumi and shoto a few moments later.

a miffed touya reaches over your shoulder to steal your phone, which you easily let go of and surrender like usual with a laugh.

his chin rests on your head, your back pressed to his chest as he perches his upper arms on your shoulders to text back.

after he hits send with a satisfied smirk, the both of you walk onto the set.

the kitchen this time was one with a less colorful theme, yet you hear a sharp intake of breath from touya and you feel your own breath catch in your throat.

the tall windows and generous lighting more than made up for it.

framed paintings of cranes were hung on the slate gray wall behind the dining table, and the refrigerator was much, much larger than the one you saw touya open before.

familiar indigo petals catch your eye. there was a beautiful painting of rindou flowers next to the window in the kitchen, and you can’t help but stare.

“mom would love those.” touya murmurs from beside you. your fingers lace through his as you smile softly in agreement.

“she would.”

still in the second showroom, touya’s rummaging inside the cabinets while you study the spice rack.

imagine all the goodies you could fit in there, from sesame seeds to shichimi togarashi.

you drool thinking about all the miso soups and sweet potatoes you could put them on when he suddenly turns to you.

“i’ve been working on my cocktails while you were at work, by the way.” touya grins, handing you an empty, plastic wine glass from where you’re perched on the granite countertop. “wanna try?”

you raise it to your lips and take a delicate sip of nothing.

“oh yum! what’d you put in it?”

“kale juice.” he snickers behind his hand. “your favorite.”

you make a disgusted face. “well that’d explain the kick to it.”

“right? i really, really think fuyumi and natsuo would like it.”

“touya todoroki, don’t you dare.”

“hey.” he raises both hands in innocence. “a little kale never hurt anyone.”

“you say that but you hate kale.”

“a little kale never hurt anyone unless it’s me.”

you roll your eyes and wrap your arms around his neck. touya’s hands smoothly guide your legs to hug his waist, bringing you closer to him from where you’re sitting on the counter. he stays standing, towering over you.

“can’t believe i’m marrying a hypocrite.” your voice is muffled against his shoulder, and he laughs.

suddenly, you gasp and point at the sink. “touya!”

his eyes widen at your raised voice, instinctively looking behind him for bugs to kill because that’s the only time your tone would sound that alarmed.

touya hugs you closer to him protectively.

you can’t help but melt as his arms wrap even tighter around you, his serious turquoise eyes still scanning around the kitchen for any threats to you.

no bugs.

no tacky “live, laugh, love”-esque sayings framed on the wall.

which he knows is your biggest interior design pet peeve after binging an insane amount of those house flipping shows with you.

“...what is it?” touya finally asks after a moment of hesitation.

you giggle at the ticklish feeling of the cold silver of his lip piercing brushing against your forehead as he speaks.

“the dishes aren’t in alphabetical order!”

touya breathes a sigh of relief, then laughs into your neck.

he pulls away to roll his eyes at you. “you nearly gave me a fucking heart attack!”

“what, why?” you laugh, fluttering your lashes at him. so utterly adorable, that he resists the urge to bite you.

touya fights back a blush and averts his eyes from your face, remembering his protective actions. they had been purely instinctive. he reaches up to cover his face with one hand.

“touuu!” you can’t help but laugh harder, reaching up to pry his fingers away from his face. “come on, look at me!”

touya shyly slides his gaze back to you, and lets you take his hand away from his face.

you lace your fingers through his and lean in to give him a sweet kiss on the lips, which only makes him blush even harder. the chill of the ikea air conditioning did nothing to help.

his eyes trail in the direction of the spice rack you were dreamily looking at earlier.

“why is this crooked?” he frowns, reaching behind you to straighten it.

“pfft is it bothering you?” you take a glance at it. looked okay enough to you.

“yeah it is.” touya’s hands are on the shelf, trying to readjust it into the right position when suddenly—

snap!

the both of your eyes widen at the sound.

the shelf was upright and more centered than before.

except now it had a clean split down the middle of it.

of course, touya chooses to focus on the most important part.

“well at least it looks better now.”

and all he can think about as you laugh into his shoulder is that he can’t wait to stand hip to hip with you in your actual kitchen.

sunshine peeking through the curtains as the two of you make soups, bake each other’s favorite pastries, and indulge in your random middle of the night cravings.

from now until forever.

after lunch in the restaurant, touya adds ikea meatballs to his list of favorite foods.

you’re pretty sure that’s only because you fed them to him.

because while you adore him to pieces, he is an unbelievably picky eater, much to fuyumi’s chagrin.

luckily, he’ll eat anything as long as you’re the one giving it to him.

your sister-in-law thanks you for her lack of headaches when she makes dinner.

in the third kitchen showroom of today, you squint out the window behind the sink.

“i don’t know if i like it.”

“don’t know if you like what?” touya’s still washing his hand in the imaginary water under the faucet that’s clearly never going to start running. his silly self has been there for the past five minutes, at least.

you hold back a laugh at how meticulous he is about it.

“the view.”

he looks up and snorts at the wistful gaze you throw out the obviously fake window.

it had a picture of city scenery taped on the wall outside of it, and the circular shape of a familiar building catches his eye. he recognizes it.

the meguro sky garden in tokyo.

the first place he ever took you out on a date to.

with a fond twitch of his lips, he remembers the way he almost tripped over his feet under the cherry blossom trees when you had suddenly pecked him on the cheek. all those years ago.

touya turns the faucet off, and comes up behind you to lean his head on your shoulder as he wraps his arms around your waist. his eyes soften as you nuzzle against his chin.

he knows that you know he can’t feel any sensations there anymore.

but god, does touya love that you still touch him in the places where he can’t feel.

the way you litter soft kisses under his eyes, stroke his forearms as you guide them to your waist. like they’re still a part of him, like he’s not broken.

like he’s always been whole to you, never any less.

“but sweetheart,” touya muses. “think about how close it's close to the best schools.”

your face heats up as you realize what he’s talking about. like you haven’t thought about it a million times before.

a kid. with him.

his and your kid.

as if the universe read your mind, a very chubby baby being pushed in a cart passes by the opposite side of the window, covering the picture of tokyo’s scenery.

and it stares at touya and you with the judgiest look you’ve ever seen in your life.

the two of you glance sideways at each other and burst out laughing.

“nevermind,” you giggle, feeling small and safe tucked in his strong arms. “maybe the view isn’t so bad.”

looking softly down at you, the beautiful color of your eyes meets his, and his heartbeat quickens.

touya can’t help but agree.

a familiar weight softly rests on your shoulder when you groggily open your eyes, and your fiancé is close to follow as he stirs beside you.

you flip around to face him from where he was spooning you, giggling at the little trail of drool coming from the corner of his mouth as you watch his eyes flutter open.

you feel your breath catch in your throat as you gaze upon him.

his hair is starlight in the morning.

touya, still half-asleep, snuggles against you, completely drunk on your warmth. the soft feeling of your skin against his.

he doesn’t even try to resist it.

the little giddy smile that tugs at his lips whenever the cool feeling silver of your sapphire embedded ring sparkles under the sunlight pooling through the curtains of your shared bedroom as he laces his fingers through yours.

his own ring softly clinking against the one he gave you.

after moving into the privacy of the apartment, with no prying eyes or nosy siblings randomly bursting into his room, touya loves to sleep with his lips just barely grazing your neck.

whenever you wake up from a nightmare, he’s already kissing the nape of it, the protective hand he has on your hip smoothing circles into your bare skin.

when he wakes from his, you’re already quietly cradling him in your arms, running your hands through his midnight black hair.

you really have no idea how hard you make it for him to get up.

but the idea of seeing you happily smile because of him is what gives him the final push to wriggle out of your embrace, and the adorable little pout you give him almost breaks his heart.

“where you going, tou?”

he grins cheekily, placing a finger on his lips. “it’s a secret.”

there's a grumble from you in response and he smooths the crinkle between your furrowed brows with a gentle kiss.

“i’'ll be back soon, i promise.”

“you better or i’m eating your last pocky.”

he laughs at your threat, as if he wouldn’t give it up to you the moment you asked.

at the sight of your eyes already starting to droop, touya presses another kiss to your forehead. “go back to sleep, sweetheart.”

“no.” you pout as his socks pad against the floor when he leaves the room with another laugh.

huddled up in your floral patterned blankets, you drink in the faint scent of sweet cologne that lingers on them.

it still smells like him. warm like him, too.

there’s an old photo of touya framed on your nightstand. you love to look at when you fold his and your clothes.

rei had slipped it out of the family album for you to keep the moment she saw how much you liked it.

it’s the one where he’s holding a baby shoto like a football in his arms. there’s an easy grin on his face.

you look at it for a little longer, letting a sleepy, content smile spread across your lips.

until five more minutes pass, and you’re starting to feel impatient.

“shoto!” you call out the doorway in the direction of the guest room you set up for him the day before he came to visit. “what’s your brother doing?”

“cooking.” comes shoto’s soft voice floating down the hallway.

and that’s all it takes for you to get up and rush to the kitchen at lightning speed.

thankfully, the fire alarm hasn’t gone off yet by the time you get there.

you find touya slicing peaches on the counter, in front of the painting of rindou flowers. there’s a plate of neatly assorted fruit next to him, and your eyes widen as you admire the rose-shaped strawberries. how’d he do that?

“hey.” touya’s eyes narrow playfully when he notices you, putting down the knife. “you’re supposed to be in bed.”

you place your hands on your hips.

“and you’re supposed to not be burning our new apartment down.”

throwing a cautious glance at the unmanned pancakes sizzling in the pan beside you, you add on. “with your little brother in it.”

he breathes a laugh and saunters over where you’re standing by the fridge, cornering you to the counter.

your fiancé grins at your stammers when he leans closer. he can practically feel the heat from your cheeks from here, and touya thinks the tiny house plant overhead grows an inch taller from the sheer warmth you’re radiating.

“stove’s off, sweetheart. they’re not gonna burn.”

“o-oh.” you sigh in relief.

“you worry too much.” touya murmurs softly as holds you in place by the waist to hold up a spoonful of blueberries he forgot to add to the batter.

your lips reluctantly part to let him feed you, and his heart skips a beat at the hint of a smile on your face.

“mmph!”

suddenly, touya’s lips are on yours and you taste the sweet tartness of the peach he must’ve had before you came over.

the cold piercing of his tongue teases your mouth and he corners you even further against the cool marble of the counter to make out, just as you hear a pot start to boil and your eyes snap open.

you’re breathless as you muster all your willpower and break away from him.

“touya, the pot!”

“oops.” he glances at it, still caging you against the counter with his arms.

“forgot about that.”

“found your necklace that fell behind the bed last week.” touya says later after breakfast. you’re both sitting on cushions fuyumi and natsuo gifted you at the coffee table in front of the tv, watching ponyo as sunlight seeps into the living room.

it swings it back and forth on his finger and your eyes widen in relief.

“i was looking everywhere for that to wear to shoto’s class party!”

“i know.” he grins, and you sigh as he presses a soft kiss to your neck. of course he did.

touya reaches around your neck to securely clasp the back of the necklace’s chain, a smirk tugging at his lips.

“i think i deserve a little reward.”

you giggle, he was so cute.

“thanks touya.” you say, pressing a kiss to his cheek, and he pouts.

“not there.”

“where then?” you smooth your hands against his bedhead and he almost whines when this time, you press a kiss to his forehead. “here?”

always such a tease, and he adores you for it.

touya looks like a desperate puppy as he huffs, nudging your nose with his.

like you didn’t spoil him with kisses yesterday when he fixed the washing machine that was acting up.

you’re still not totally sure how he did it, but that was probably because you zoned out while he was explaining it to you.

too busy watching the way his forearms flexed as he fixed the pipes behind it and when he’d take whatever wrench or screwdriver he asked you to hand him from the toolbox.

finally, finally your lips find his and you kiss him, soft and sweet.

a cool breeze blows through the open window, and the both of you breathe it in, smelling dewdrops on grass from the rain last night and hints of sunshine.

touya smiles against your mouth, arms pulling you into his lap so he can taste you better.

you’re stuck with him.

from now until forever.

“or maybe home is just two arms wrapped around you when you’re at your worst.”

— danagray

#div cr v6que #pink touya cr @me LOL #domestic touya is so special to me #touya todoroki x reader #dabi x reader #touya x reader #mha x reader #dabi x you #bnha x reader #bnha oneshot #mha oneshot #dabi fluff

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princessbrunette · 9 months ago

Text

⊹ . ⁺ 🍭🤍⋅˚₊𐙚

being sarah’s lil best friend who just won’t leave rafe alone.

you always see yourself into the house, which aggravates him as it means he has no control over the home he sees as his own, stepping up for ward. sarah hasn’t even made it out of her bedroom before you’ve barrelled into the kitchen in the tiniest shorts and a bikini top that might aswell not be there, throwing your arms around him as soon as he turns around.

“hiiiii rafe!” you practically pur, lashes batting and purposeful. he swore he could even feel you pushing yourself up against the shape between his thighs beneath his shorts.

“shouldnt you be with my sister?” he drawls in a deadpan, trying his best to ignore the way his body heats up. he peels you off his body and pushes his hair back.

“what i can’t say hi?” you coo, clasping your hands all faux innocent below your waist, the act of your arms coming inwards only forcing your tits to jostle together. he licks his lips subconsciously. jesus, rafe— control yourself. that’s your little sisters friend.

he doesn’t get to think of an answer because sarah comes swinging in, instantly wrapping a hand around your arm. “hey! there you are.” she directs her attention to rafe, a glare. “is my pervert brother bothering you?” she scowls and he throws his hands up in exasperation, knowing for once he actually didn’t do anything wrong.

“no, no. it’s okay.” you shake your head all shy, all victim-like and non-convincingly which only makes sarah shake her head in disgust at her brother, leading you up the stairs. he watches you go, and you peer over your shoulder — stifling a giggle as you bite down on your manicure. fucking menace.

he doesn’t like losing, or more specifically — losing control, so when you show up one day when sarah isn’t home, he feels like he has to escape you before he gives into his impulses.

“there you are, been lookin’ all over for you.” you chirp, sliding into the kitchen where he stands at the fridge. his eyes widen for a second, looking around for his sister.

“y—you know sarah’s not even home. wastin’ your time here ‘cos she’s off with that routledge kid.” he shakes his head, forcing nonchalance as he leans down to scan the inside of the fridge. you’re at his side before he blinks, nail grazing his thick, tanned arm as you all but pet him. he felt weak.

“cant i just hang out with you? why’s it always gotta be about sarah?” you pout, urging him to look your way. you’d really perfected your doe eyed pout since you’d last visited, and the angle you stood at gave him the perfect view down your top. it’s exactly why he grabbed an apple juice carton and turned away, meandering away from the fridge after closing it.

“well i’m not your friend, alright? go home.” he commands, but of course you follow.

“you’re playin’ hard to get.” you whine.

“you’re playing hard to get rid of.” he retorts and you giggle, catching up to him.

“play with me rafey.” you chime seductively, and the tone makes his cock jump. so much so that it irritates him, and as you reach to grab at him again, he snaps around to you, gripping your wrist.

“quit with the slut shit, alright? you’re my little sisters friend. know what that means? means you’re just a fucking kid.” his voice raises only a tad, but it’s enough to snap you out of your whole bravado— the act dropped as you stare up at him with wide eyes, shocked. he can see that you’re hurt and he lets go, the regret instantly settling in as he licks his lips thoughtfully, scratching his forehead.

“okay.” you barely whisper, rejected and damaged. he watches you for a moment, and as you move away to leave he speaks.

“sarah will probably be home soon she… she always comes back. so… just go hang in her room. you’re uh—welcome to stay, alright?” he raises his eyebrows, talking all slow and reassuring the same way you’d speak to a younger sibling to stop them from crying and snitching on you when you play too rough. that wasn’t much comfort to you.

you do as he says and stay there for the rest of the evening. you wake from your slumber when the door cracks open, late at night. you think it might be sarah, but you’re met with her big brother instead.

“sarah still not back?” he converses awkwardly, though the answer is clear. you shake your head, shy and bashful. this was where he wanted you. the control was back in his hands. he’d broken you down to make you feel like you couldn’t have him, and now he could take what he wanted.

he nods, slowly approaching the bed and he almost smirks at that hopeful look in your eyes.

“doin’ a bad thing, kid. you are aware of that, right?” he asks and you nod, your turn to look guilty. he scratches at his jaw, deep in thought as he eyes you over— cute little lacy cami and pyjama shorts that rode up far too high. shit, he could even see your nipples through the thin fabric of your top. was he meant to be the bad guy for not being able to resist this shit? “must think you’re a big girl… comin’ onto me like that earlier. hah…” he chuckles, almost nervously at what he’s about to do.

“just want you. s’not my fault.” you pout and he fixes his expression to a faux solemn frown, nodding like he was very serious.

“yeah, nah— can’t… can’t control what our bodies want, right?” he justifies and you nod before the two of you stare at eachother. his minds made up. “so ‘fuck you still staring at me for? take those shorts off… n’roll over. not dealin’ with the guilt of the shit you’re about to make me do in my sisters bed.”

⊹ . ⁺ 🍭🤍⋅˚₊𐙚

#rafe cameron prompt #bfb!rafe

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jaredpadonlyyyy · 3 months ago

Text

𝘼𝙁𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙋𝙐𝙍𝙂𝘼𝙏𝙊𝙍𝙔

• 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏, 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏𝙔𝙔, 𝙎𝙈𝙐𝙏

• 𝟭𝟴+ 𝙊𝙉𝙇𝙔𝙔𝙔

• 𝙋 𝙄𝙉 𝙑 (𝙒𝙧𝙖𝙥 𝙞𝙩 𝙪𝙥!) 𝙁𝙀𝙈𝘼𝙇𝙀 𝙍𝙀𝘾𝙀𝙄𝙑𝙄𝙉𝙂, 𝙎𝙀𝙓, 𝘿𝙄𝙍𝙏𝙔 𝙏𝘼𝙇𝙆, 𝙐𝙉𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙏𝙀𝘾𝙏𝙀𝘿 𝙎𝙀𝙓.

• 🖤 • • 🩶 • • 🩶 • • 🩶 • • 🩶 • • 🩶 • • 🖤 •

It had been a year since Dean had disappeared along with the angel Castiel. It’s also been a year since they all lost Bobby singer as well. But it’s been 6 months since she decided it was time to move on from looking for him. All she did was find dead end after dead end. Sam, he hadn’t looked for his brother, but he found happiness in a woman named Amelia. He was happy and that’s all that mattered. It’s also been 3 months since she had Dean’s baby. She didn’t know she was pregnant until weeks later. So, she spent 9 months pregnant stressing about looking for the love of her life and the father of her baby. But it was dead end after dead end. So she had to put that aside and take care of herself and try to move on.

Sam and his new girl were there most of the time. They lived in the same town as her. He visited her at times to help with her son Milo, so she can work and feed herself and her son. There were times when she would get into a depressive state and wouldn’t be able to get out of bed. So, Sam and Amelia would help her out until she would start to feel a little better.

Today was Milo’s first birthday and she had made a party to celebrate it. She had invited her co-workers with kids. She had also invited Sam, but he hasn’t made it to the party yet. The party finished and he never made an appearance. “So, is there anyway I can offer you a drink?” Henry caught her attention. She looked over at him and she smiled at him. “I need to clean all of this up.” She told him as he nods his head. “Looks like you need the drink.” He told her.

“Honestly I do need that drink.” She said as he smiled at her. They walked over to the kitchen and she takes out two glasses and the whiskey she had. She looked over at the backyard and saw one of her good friends playing with her one year old. She pours the whiskey into the glasses and hands one to Henry.

“So, what are you doing this Friday night?” He asked her as she took a drink from her glass. “Well, nothing really. It’s my day off.” She said as he nods his head at her. “So, can I take you out this Friday night?” He asked. She looked over at him. She when she opens her mouth. The doorbell rings. “One second, please”

She walked over to the door and opened it seeing it was none other than Sam. “Where the hell have you been? I’ve been—.” Her words fell short as she made eye contact with those beautiful mossy green eyes. “Oh my god.” She said as she covered her mouth with her hands. “Hey, baby.” He said as a tear falls from her eye. “I-is it really you?” She asked him as he softly smiled at her. She ran into his waiting arms as he hugged her tightly, his eyes closed as he wanted to feel her embrace since the moment he made it out of purgatory. “I missed you so much.” He whispered.

“Uh, hi.” Henry broke their hug apart. Dean looked over at him frowning. “Who’s this?” He asked as she looked over at Dean. “Uh, can you give us a second?” She asked the brothers. They both nodded as they walked into the home. “Um, im sorry. Uh, I don’t think I can go on that date.” She told him as she could see the heartbreak in his blue eyes as he slowly nods. “You’re with Sam, aren’t you?” He asked her as she laughed. “Sam? No, Dean, yes.” She told him. He looked at her weird. “He’s the father of my son.” She said. “Fine, whatever.” He said as he started to walk away. “Henry! Henry!” She called out but he just kept on walking and ignored her call out of his name.

She sighs and walked into the home and she saw Sam and Dean in the kitchen. Dean heard footsteps coming his way and made eye contact with her and he softly smiled. “Sorry about that.” She said as Sam just shakes his head. “I get it.” He told her just as her friend Melina comes inside the house with Milo in her arms. “Mama.” A little voice said as she gave her to her. “Mama?” Dean said as he looked at the little boy.

He walked towards her as she picked him up in her arms. “Dean, this is Milo.” She told him as he looked at the one year old. “Dada?” The baby said as he looked at Dean. “He is your son.” She told him as he looked at her. She could see the shock written all over his face. “He’s mine?” Dean asked her as she smiled. She nodded her head. “I haven’t been with anyone else, Dean.” She told him as he takes in a deep breath. “Wow, uh.” He cleared his throat at the news. “Can I, uh, carry him?” Dean asked her as she nods her head. He reached for Milo, and the little boy didn’t have a problem going with the Winchester man. “Dada?” Milo said looking into his dad’s eyes.

“I’ve showed him pictures.” She told him as he looks at her with teary eyes.

• 🌙 • • • • • 🩶 • • • • ✨ • • • • 🩶 • • • • • 🌙 •

Dean told her that he was going to put Milo to bed. And he went to go do that. She knew Dean, was always good with kids. They always loved him when they met him. Sam and Y/N were waiting for Dean to get back to the kitchen as they both drank from their drinks she poured into 3 glasses. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t come.” Sam told her as she shakes her head. “Oh no, it’s fine.” She told him. “You were with your brother.” She said just as Dean came back up with a smile on his face. Sam finished his drink and looked at them. “All right, well, I’ll see you both tomorrow.” Sam said as he walked out of the kitchen leaving the two hunters alone. “Goodnight, Sammy.” Y/N said.

After Dean walked him out and locked the door he walked back into the kitchen. “So, when did you find out?” Was the first thing he asked her as he walked into the kitchen. “A month after you were gone.” She said to the man as he nods his head. “Where were you?” She asked him as he walked closer to her. “I was in purgatory.” He told her making her eyes widen “of course.” She whispered to herself. “Why didn’t I think of that.” She looked up at the Winchester man.

“You looked for me?” Dean asked her thinking that she didn’t. “Yeah, I did. For months I looked for you.” She said to him. “But I started showing, and my pregnancy became a high risk.” She told him as he nods his head. “I had to calm down or I could’ve lost Milo.” She said. “I understand.” He told her as he puts his hand on her cheek. She leaned onto his touch and she sighs. “I missed you so much.” She whispered to him. “You’re the only thing that kept me going in purgatory, getting back to you, was my only fucking motivation.” Dean told her as she smiled up at him.

“So, are you going to kiss me. Or do I have to ask for it?” She asked him as she looked up at him. Dean then smirked down at her. He leaned down and he placed his lips gently on hers. He grabbed her by her waist and pulled her towards his chest as he made the kiss deeper. Y/N moaned into the kiss as he then picked her up and sat her on the counter, his hands giving her thighs a gentle squeeze going up her dress Y/N pulled away for a breath making her gasp as he kissed down her neck to her chest as he pulled down the strap of her dress. “Fuck, Dean.” She said as she runs her hands through his short locks as he pulled down her dress making her chest pop out from her dress. Dean latched on to her nipple biting it as she moaned. She wrapped her legs around his waist.

Y/N gets off the counter letting the dress fall from her body and he looked at her. “Mmm. I seen you kept yourself busy.” He said as he looked at her very fit body. “Well, I had to lose the baby fat.” She told him as he shook his head. “I wouldn’t mind some baby fat.” He told her making her chuckled as she reached for him belt buckle taking it off along with his jeans and his boxers hitting the ground as his dick sprits up. Y/N grabbed onto it spreading his pre cum around his tip as she pumps it making him breath heavy as he hasn’t been touched in nearly over a year

Dean moaned his eyes closed as she slowly pumped her hand up and down his hard dick. Dean opens his eyes and takes off his jacket letting it fall to the floor as well as his shirts. He picks her up as she laughed. He asked her where her bedroom was and she lead the way. He opened the door going inside with her.

He tossed her on the bed making her bounce a few times as he closed the door behind him. Y/N opens her legs so he could get a good view of her pretty pink glistening pussy. He watched as she puts a finger into her mouth wetting it, as she looked at his mossy green eyes. She takes it out her mouth with a popping sound making him groan as he dick jumped as he got excited. She slides it down to her clit and she rubs it slowly making her let out a moan as she hasn’t felt any kind of pleasure since the last time she was with him. “Dean, fuck.” She moaned softly.

Dean growled as he rushed over making her giggle. He got on top of her as he roughly placed his lips on hers grinding his dick on her folds making her gasp into the kiss. Dean pulled away from the kiss and kisses down her chest, her stomach, the top of her pussy. His fingers spreading her lips open as he looks at her aching pussy. “So, wet for me.” He said as he looked up at her. He leaned down and sucked on her clit making her let out a loud moan. “Ah!” She moans

Dean flicks his tongue on her bundle of nerves as his ring finger and his middle finger go to her entrance. He slides them into her slowly making her arch her back off the bed as her leg shakes a little bit. “Oh my fuck!” She gasped as the tip of his fingers touched her G-Spot. Making her legs shake as she encased him between her thighs. “Cum for me, cum for me baby.” Dean told her as he relentlessly started to pick up his pace with his fingers inside of her making her into a moaning mess. “Mmmpm.” She moaned and she groaned as she clenched on his fingers, his tongue flickering her clit making her a shaking mess.

“Don’t stop, oh god!!” She squealed as the coil in her stomach exploded making her see stars, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as her walls flutter around his fingers, her juices spilling into his mouth. Twitching she slumped into the mattress breathing hard as he slowed down talking out his long fingers out of her sensitive pussy making her gasp at that.

Dean stood back up and leaned down to kiss her. She moaned as she tasted herself on his lips as he kissed her. “Please, Dean I need you.” She whispered to him. “Tell me how much.” He asked her, his voice deep and husky. “So, so, much.” She told him as he lines himself at her entrance. He immediately slides inside of her making her gasp loudly as he thrusted inside of her. Dean groaned as he felt her around him. “Fuck, baby so tight.” He grunted as he slowly starts to move his hips. “Fuck.” She lets out a loud moan and a gasp as he started to pick up his speed at a good pace. She hugged Deans shoulders making him put his head onto the crook of her neck, his breath fanning on her neck. Her grunted as he kept his steady pace. “Fuck, yes! You f-feel so good!” She said

Dean pulled almost all the way out and thrusted back inside hard. “Aaah!!” She moaned and gasped at the same time as he did it a few times. The tip of his dick hitting her sweet spot over and over, bringing her closer to the edge to her second orgasm of the night. “Faster please.” She said as she wrapped her legs around his waist, her heels dig into his ass making him so go deeper into her. “Ooh! Dean!” Her mouth drops open as her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

“Cum for me baby, let it go.” Dean whispered against her neck. “Aaah!” Her back arched as she digs her nails against his shoulders as he slams into her hard. “Keep going, keep going, keep goooing! Aah!” She saw stars as she exploded. Her walls fluttering on his dick. Dean sat up on his heels and hugged her legs looking at her face as she shook uncontrollably as he fucked her so hard. He lets go of her legs putting his hands on her hips buckling them into the air grinding them on his dick as he grunted. Dean started breathing heavy as he felt his dick start to twitch.

“I’m cumming, god. Aargh!!” Dean threw his head back as he kept on grinding her hips as he coats her walls with his seed. Shot after shot as he moaned so loudly. “Fuuuck.” He groaned letting her hips go as he falls on top of her his hot breath hitting her neck. Both still felt a few twitches from his dick as he just stays still. They both do. Satisfied smiles on their faces. Dean started to pull out. “Ah.” She moaned softly as he rolled to the side his dick softens up.

Their hearts calming down from the rush they just felt. Their bodies calming down from that high.

“Whew.” Dean said as they both chuckled. Y/N went into his waiting arms with a smile on her face. She was about to say something when Milo started to cry. “Oop, fun over.” She said making the hunter laugh. Y/N got up as she stumbled a little making the Winchester man laugh. “What? It’s been a whole year of no orgasms.” She told him as she holds herself up.

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#supernatural #spnfandom #spn #dean winchester #jensen ackles #dean winchester smut #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x y/n

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