#my Friend and I are just... masterminds at this point wow

[cheerful-skele]

Syumitaro slaying

. . . .. . . . . . . .. . . .. . . .. .. . . . . . .. . . . ..

Slay queen slaayyyy~~~

[spr1ngbunnypvrin]

In what ways can we annoy 👁️ 📺 the doctor once he's comfortable having us around?

Since he's always watching us and his minions loves us more than him, I think it's only fair that he receives our rebellious bratty affections too

For science of course ✨

Oh, absolutely. If The Doctor is going to haunt every screen, command an army of little gremlins, and act like a smug, untouchable mastermind, then it’s only fair that we annoy the hell out of him in return. After all, what’s the point of being his “favorite” if we don’t make him suffer a little?

So, for science, here are some of the best ways to mess with The Doctor once he’s comfortable having you around:

1. Name His Minions Stupid Things

The Critters? You nickname them like they're Pokémon.

“This one’s Greg. That one? Mr. Chompers. Oh, and this little guy? He's my emotional support nightmare.”

The robotic bodies? You give them absurd names based on their appearance.

“Hey, Steve! Get over here!”

The Doctor: “They are NOT named—”

“Shhh, Steve is speaking.”

Bonus: If you call one of his bodies “Blinky” because of the eye on the screen, he will stop talking to you for an hour out of pure spite.

2. Purposely Misquote Him

Any time he says something intimidating, twist his words into something embarrassing.

The Doctor: “You cannot escape my sight.”

You: “Aww, so you admit you’re obsessed with me?”

The Doctor: “THAT IS NOT—”

Bonus: Do it in front of his minions so they start believing it.

3. Stare Directly Into the Nearest Camera and Make Awkward Eye Contact

Since he’s always watching, just… stare.

Don’t blink.

The Doctor: “What are you doing?”

You: “Just making sure you’re still there, buddy.”

Extra points if you slowly inch closer to the camera like a horror movie character.

Even MORE points if you whisper:

“Can you feel me staring into your soul?”

“Boo.”

"Guess what? I unplugged that camera. You're talking to NOTHING right now."

4. Draw Silly Faces on His Screens

If there’s a dusty screen, draw a dumb face on it.

If he possesses a monitor, immediately draw a mustache on it.

The Doctor: “Remove that atrocity immediately.”

You: “Sorry, can’t hear you over how handsome you look with this curly mustache.”

5. Pretend You Can't Hear Him When He's Talking Through a Bad Speaker

If his voice glitches out or sounds weird over an old speaker, pretend you can’t understand.

The Doctor: “—ou under—tand me?”

You: “What? I think you said something about spaghetti?”

The Doctor: “No, I sa—”

You: “Did you just ask me to unplug you? Got it.”

The Doctor: “CEASE.”

6. Replace His Intimidating Dialogue With Cutesy Nicknames

The Doctor: “You are mine.”

You: “Okay, possessive much, Snugglebug?”

The Doctor: “…WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?”

You: “I said, ‘Okay, Professor Cuddles, chill.’”

7. Hug His Minions Right in Front of Him

The Nightmare Critters already love you. Show them extra affection just to rub it in.

Hug one of the robotic bodies and go, “Wow, you’re so much nicer than your creator.”

The Doctor: “…Excuse me?”

You: “Shhh. Steve is my best friend now.”

Bonus: If you pet Yarnaby like a cat, it will immediately vibrate aggressively in approval.

8. Keep Saying “What’s the Magic Word?”

Any time he orders you to do something, act like a strict kindergarten teacher.

The Doctor: “Move to the next room.”

You: “What’s the magic word?”

The Doctor: “…Obey.”

You: “Nope, try again.”

Extra chaos: Make him say “please” in the most reluctant, soul-crushing tone possible.

9. Randomly Poke the Nearest Camera

Whenever you pass a camera, just boop it.

The Doctor: “…Stop that.”

Boop.

The Doctor: “I said STOP.”

Boop.

(He eventually shuts the camera off just to make you stop.)

10. Throw Something at One of His Bodies and Blame it on the Minions

You: [chucks a random item at his robot body]

The Doctor: “What was that?”

You: “Uh… Yarnaby did it.”

The Doctor: “That is the least believable lie I have ever heard.”

Yarnaby: [Vibrates aggressively, confirming guilt.]

11. Walk Into a Room and Say “I Know What You Did” Without Any Context

Doesn’t matter what he’s actually doing. Just say it.

The Doctor: “…”

You: “Yeah. I saw that.”

The Doctor: “…Elaborate.”

You: “You know what you did.”

Bonus: Do this while looking directly at a camera, then leave the room without another word.

12. Pretend You Found His “Secret Diary”

You: “So, I found your diary.”

The Doctor: “I do not KEEP a diary.”

You: “Really? Then who wrote ‘Dear Diary, today my minions ignored me in favor of my human and I felt deeply betrayed’?”

The Doctor: “…You INSOLENT—”

13. Leave Sticky Notes on His Screens with Passive-Aggressive Messages

“Your eye looks extra evil today. Good job!”

“Blink once if you have emotions.”

“Reminder: Stop being ominous for five minutes challenge (failed).”

“If you kill me, who will annoy you?”

14. Mess With His Voice Recordings

If he ever leaves an audio log, alter it.

Edit his voice so he sounds adorably squeaky.

The Doctor: “WHO DID THIS?!”

You: “Oh wow, your voice sounds SO CUTE. You should keep it.”

15. Summon Him Like a Ghost

Stand in a dark hallway.

Look into a broken screen.

Say “Doctor, Doctor, Doctor” like it’s Bloody Mary.

The nearest screen flickers to life.

The Doctor: “WHAT are you DOING.”

You: “Summoning you.”

The Doctor: “…I hate you.”

[lifea16]

Mastermind live thoughts [Spoilers below cut]

The animation is amazing like oh my god! 💕

Ah, gonna be the Stolas trial I see

Andre stop flirting with your sister

✨Unpaid interns✨

Fuck.. double trial I see

RUN

Be fucking faster

Why do they sound like the cherubs

What is this….?

“Face the music” is honestly a bit too funny

Trailer scene time!

FUCK

Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

Blitz you don’t deserve to be deadnamed :/

???

Andre what did I just say, stop flirting with her, at some point comphet is cursed

Oh thank Satan (?) that Blitz actually defended himself against the possibility he forced himself onto Stolas

Candle head in Wrath?

Vassago bilingual? And he here!

Don’t you wanna take Stolas down first??

Yep.. they are claiming Blitz S/A’d Stolas in the trial. Fuck. At least hopefully the Blitz antis will realise they’re wrong in the episode

Bestie (/s) I think you got Blitz and your sister’s names confused. Put Stella on trial coward

Grimour, Stricker

You tell them Blitz!

Poor Mox :(

Go off Bea!! /pos

Yep you too Ozz! Tell ‘em

Mammon aren’t you Ace?? Don’t you want not to be fucked??

Satan looks a lot more like a Candlehead than I would’ve thought

How is this not the finale?? AAAA

Well shit….

Yay! Classism!

Poor Fizz, seeing your best friend (?) almost get executed live on TV! TF

Blitz sacrifices himself (tries to) <//3

(My hc) “Bitches (Blitz) say “I wanna die” like a broken record, but when you almost get executed on live tv, you shit yourself

Stolas save your future boyfriend now!!!

Go off Blitz! Tell ‘em off on their classism

As much as I understand not liking racial coding, .. Blitz and imps in general especially in this episode are very POC coded, with a lot of he’ll just being racist

</3

No Blitz don’t accept your fate 😭😭😭😭😭😭

Stolas ex machena please please please please

😭😭😭😭😭😭

Why Blitz must you care so fucking much about your family and if I could cry I’m pretty sure I would be by now

The screencap I paused on is so pretty.. To bad it’s Blitz getting executed (And almost made me wanna cry) or I’d make it my banner

Aaaaa

Fuck yes Stolas!!

Blitz is saved !! ✨⭐️💕

Boyfriends protecting eachother 💕

Yay! Songs! <3

XD “half a brain”

“Some kind of Mastermind-“ roll credits

Stolas I know you’re dealing with rascists but please don’t act like that with Blitz rn ur doing a regression and I hope it’s an act

Nevermind lol kinda

Yep. This is a clear racial allegory. No hiding it now

Fancy ahh reveal Stolas

Also we just shifted the “I’ll sacrifice for my loved ones” horse to Stolas instead of Blitz

Stolas ur an idiot too

Fuck yes! Romantic ish Stolitz duet part!

No Blitz you fucking deserve to live <333

And I’m back too “if only tears could fall” again.. Please Blitz take his sacrifice and save him after that till the system breaks and you two will be free

Either death or.. whatever happened last two episodes

Shit

Where is Lucifer? Just because Luci’s in his depression era doesn’t mean you are the ruler of hell Satan

Oh nevermind

The sins have existed before Luci fell. Interesting

Blitz is so defensive over Stolas and his life ahh 💕😭

Step 1: *Panic* , Step 2: “Wow this is a sturdy door”

Blitz is being silly but not swearing so he must be concealing his emotions again

<33 Group hug <33

Are we starting some weird chain now (Octavia was now alerted and running for Stolas)

Or not..

Poor Via </3

Loophole! Also more racism allegory!

Banishing him is actually a decent idea (for once)

Ohhh Andrealphus just wants power. Honestly I should have figured sooner lol

If this is Mastermind then what the actual fuck will Sinmas be (unless it’s another Queen Bee situation)

100 years.. So have a relationship with Blitz and once that’s done go back to royalty! Sounds great!

..wait are we getting imp Stolas

Nevermind lol. Just hatless

He will enjoy very much

Ooh!~ Our theories were right! (Stolas must also learn classism the hard way for a bit)

So the white pupils are permanent now

<3

OMG Blitz hero! Yay!!! <3

<3333

Blitz is at an all time high and Stolas is at an all time low.. interesting

<33333

So.. are they immediately dating now?

THIS WAS ALL SO AMAZING!! Favourite episode now!

[shibazoid]

Legacy of Manwich {2.5} Like No One's Watching

If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

Welcome back to Legacy of Manwich, where I'm not nearly inebriated enough. Last time, Goneril and Regan grew into a couple of weird, angry sluts, just like their namesakes.

Look who's finally working towards his stupid Lifetime Want! Try not to have sex with a dolphin, Martin, I know that's shockingly difficult for people in your career path.

King Martin: "SHUT UP IT HAPPENED LIKE ONCE OKAY!"

Regan: "Now, I don't believe in Agartha, I think that's Nazi bullshit, but the Hollow Earth diplomats did sign a non-disclosure agreement with the Vatican in 1632 to hide the locations of the entrances. Everyone knows there's the two in the south and north poles, but I believe there's at least one in every major city that world leaders use to travel the globe. That takes us to Operation Highjump... Wait, what did you say about a country album? Sorry, I don't listen to anything other than black metal and harsh noise."

Baby girl, I don't think Cletus the Slack-jawed Yokel wants to hear about your theories, or Rotting Christ for that matter. Why don't you go spend some time with your sister?

Regan: "Wow, Cordelia! It says right here in the book of Revelation that you're a filthy stink goblin sent straight from toilet hell!"

Cordelia: "I'm sick of the Bible, can we read Dr. Seuss instead?"

I'm reasonably sure the only books Regan owns are the Bible and The DaVinci Code.

Goneril's putting all 9 of her nice points to good use.

Goneril: "And who let YOU out of anime club, you goofy bitch?"

Toni: "You're just jealous I have friends!"

And now she comes by every night to steal the newspaper or kick over the trash can. Thanks, Goneril!

Goneril: "I don't need anyone except for my beloved sisters! <3"

I need to get you girls some friends or dates or something because you're way too insular. Not to mention entirely socially stunted, good lord.

Regan: "Hey! I have friends! Look who I brought home from school!"

Oh yeah? What's her name?

Regan: "Oh! Uh, um... Hmm... Meadow Thayer?"

Nice try. Go watch your little sister grow up.

Cordelia: "I wish to be super hot, and for Shiba to install ReShade soon so these screenshots look nicer!"

Yeah, it's gonna be like Gen 3 before I get around to that, and even then I forget to turn it on most times. What was the other wish?

Aww, she turned out very cute! She looks a lot like her mom, but she has Martin's nose! Cordelia rolled Pleasure/Knowledge and her LTW is to be a Criminal Mastermind. I don't think I ever mentioned what the twins' were, but Goneril wants to be a Cult Leader (lmao) and Regan wants 20 Simultaneous Lovers.

Just in case you were wondering what Martin and Lillie have been up to this whole time. And yes, their weird ass daughters STILL come into the room when it happens!

Goneril: "If y equals -3x plus 4, and x plus 4y equals -6, then what are x and y? Mom? Dad? How do I solve this?"

Martin and Lillie: "ooohh hehehe mm smooch smooch hehe <3"

Goneril: "Shiba? Do you know?"

Sorry, kid, I failed Algebra II twice.

Meanwhile, Regan remembered she's a Romance sim and started charming the pants off Agamemnon.

Regan: "I heard how you called my dad a creep at the gas station. That's very sexy and masculine of you."

Agamemnon: "Oh! Gee, um, thanks?"

Goneril: "Did I just hear you insulted my dad? That's pretty hot, actually!"

Agamemnon: "I am confused, but aroused!"

Regan ultimately won out over her sister, because she is by nature a Huge Skank.

Agamemnon: "I am in townie heaven either way!"

Regan: "Uh, Mom!!! You are totally embarrassing me right now!!"

In defense of your parents, this is THEIR room and the door was closed. Why don't you go apply for some scholarships so I can get you voyeurs the hell out of here?

Oh, never mind, the game glitched the fuck out. OFF TO COLLEGE YOU GO, POOR AND DESTITUTE LIKE THE REST OF US!

Here's the girls, all grown up! I gave them some appropriate make-overs, declared their majors, and set them loose on the dormie population!

You out-of-shape motherfuckers don't even know what horrors have been unleashed. (I don't remember what most of their names are because they are all dead, spoilers.)

This guy here that Regan's got in her clutches is Kit Reznor. I just wanted to mention that because I like his edgy name and also he's a big fucking loser.

Goneril: "Ugh! Ew! This guy smells like piss and BO!"

Come on, Kit, it's the morning of the second day of the term, you can't be doing this shit already.

Kit: "Please don't touch me, I'm really not in the mood."

Regan: "Huh? Why? What's wrong?"

He's soaked in fucking urine, dude, what's wrong with you?

Regan: "Cordy, can you fucking believe it? Kit turned me down!"

Cordelia: "Kit? The piss guy? You tried to get with him?"

I'm not sure what's more embarrassing, being so desperate that you're hitting on the pants-wetter or being turned down by said pants-wetter.

She moved on pretty quickly, with some guy named Odo who might be even more humiliating to be seen with. You'll be seeing a lot of Odo later, but he doesn't currently live in their dorm building. (Which is kind of a blessing because this place is Hell)

Don't worry, Cordelia and Goneril are also getting ass with these nerds. Cordelia's boytoy is Terrance and Goneril's is Pacey. I hate both of them terribly.

Terrance: "Wow, are you guys sisters? Sexiness really runs in the family, huh?"

Regan: "Legacy eugenics will do that, yeah."

Cordelia: "I'M WATCHING YOU BITCHES!"

WHAT'S GOING ON IN HERE?!

Goneril: "I DON'T KNOW BUT IT FEELS STRANGELY FAMILIAR!"

She put it out, miraculously, but that's all I have room for today! Until next time!

[itsygjunkie]

"Cleaning Up", ToDae ficlet

Hi friends, I don't know if anyone is out there who would like to read todae, but I've been itching to write a novel about them. Since it's too hard, here's a drabble. A ficlet. You choose.

It's early-days-bigbang, so seungri is mentioned. It's a dorm romance, so it's probably like most K-pop fanfics, and there's mention of erection fyi. Plus all the regular todae tropes including jiyong as an evil mastermind

"I'm gonna watch till the end of the episode," Seunghyun says, eyes glued to the screen, feigning disinterest.

********************************************

At some point, it's just Daesung and Seunghyun in the living room, each sprawled on a different couch, too exhausted to move but unwilling to call it a night.

Seunghyun has been dying to go to sleep for hours, but he can't bring himself to leave - not when he has the rare chance to be alone with Daesung. He suspects Daesung feels the same. They both laughed at Jiyong's jokes, played along with his antics, but they also exchanged far too many giggly glances, catching each other's eyes over the rim of their drinks.

When Jiyong finally announces he's heading to bed, he makes a point to stretch the moment, squinting at Daesung like he's just spotted a rare bird. "You're still up?" he muses, voice dripping with suspicion. "Wow. No, it's just-yeah, it's weird. You? Awake? After 11?" Daesung waves him off, entirely unconvincing. "What? I have my white nights too sometimes." "Never witnessed one myself, but I'd love to see it sometime." Jiyong smirks and starts walking to his room.

He lingers in the doorway, one eyebrow raised as he watches Seunghyun sink deeper into the couch, making no move to leave. “Hyung,” he drawls, voice laced with amusement, “weren’t you super tired today? Kept yawning all afternoon, said you were gonna pass out the second we got home…” He smirks, glancing between Seunghyun and Daesung. “Guess you got a second wind?”

Daesung flinches when Seunghyun finds a ticklish spot. "Future you will curse Seungri for making a mess - when he's actually the one who went to bed earliest - then leave to buy breakfast with future Jiyong-hyung while future me and future Youngbae-hyung clean everything up. And by the time you get back, you'll be so happy to return to a cleaner home. Wow. Look at that. I'm saving future you from unnecessary inconvenience." Seunghyun huffs against his skin. 

Jiyong hums to himself. A beat later, Seunghyun hears the soft click of his door closing, leaving him alone with Daesung.

Once they're alone, neither of them seems to know what to do with themselves. With the end credits of the tv show over, the room settles into a strange quiet. Seunghyun wants to kiss him, wants to press their lips together hard enough that Daesung won't think of making a joke about it. He watches the way Daesung fidgets, the way his gaze flickers, hesitant, but not unwilling. 

Daesung moves first, shifting onto the edge of Seunghyun's couch. He rests a hand on Seunghyun's knee just as Seunghyun sits up, and then they're kissing, teeth clashing, giggling into each other's mouths before catching their rhythm. Seunghyun fists a handful of Daesung's hair, Daesung fumbles with Seunghyun's collar, their movements growing more frantic until Daesung pulls back, breathless. "Come to my room," he says. "I want to at least lock the door." Seunghyun is on his feet immediately, already heading in the right direction when he realizes Daesung isn't following. He turns to see his dongsaeng gathering up glasses and empty bottles.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Seunghyun asks, standing there with the obvious evidence of his arousal straining against his jeans. "Cleaning up a little." Daesung hums, brushing past him to drop the glasses into the already spotless sink - Youngbae's handiwork from earlier. "Why now?" Seunghyun groans. "Because I'd like to wake up to a nice house," Daesung replies simply, scooping up stray bottles. "It calms me down. I'm giving future me a gift." "Future me will do it. Tomorrow." Seunghyun steps behind him, arms circling his waist, mouth pressing lazy kisses along the back of his neck.

"Are you done?"

"Go wait in my room," Daesung whispers back.

[kindestofkings]

a mastermind [2]

ryan mcmahon x reader

faceclaim: phoebe bridgers

authors note: happy friday everyone, proud of you for making it through the week xx @orangeinecstasy here you are <3

2022

yourusername just added to their story!

replies:

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↳ yourusername I KNOW I KNOW OKAY but matty he was so nice and I had so much fun 😭

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↳ yourusername I'm home next week xx and of course we may or may doing something tomorrow... just the two of us 👀👀

lucydacus the drummer???

↳ yourusername the one and only 😍

julienrbaker we let you go on ONE solo trip and this happens....

↳ yourusername im sorry!!! he was even dreamier in person 😔

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername pints with the lads 💪💪💪

new friends unlocked! a band, with a nepo baby lead singer... do I have a type? and where do I leave back the old model

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bobbyskeetz josh man you're giving that pint some look 👀

joshjenkinson_ the look of love what else?

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(liked by trumanblack,bedfordanes75 and adam1975)

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yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15

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yourusername I see you, I love you and I am a your fellow sad girlie <3

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ryanmcmahon_15 🔥🔥

ynhealytruther no comments from the 1975 lads, whats going on 😔

ryanmcmahon_15

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ryanmcmahon_15 some shows in new york.

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lewevans hey no paps please xx

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ryanmcmahon_15 second nature at this point 😎 inhalerfan2 ariana what are you doing here? inhalerfan1 shes friends with the lads!

2023

yourusername

liked by julienrbaker and others

yourusername heyy its been while sorry! unplanned mysterious retreat but I've busy writing, busy recording with my fellow geniuses and busy rehearsing!

so heres a slutty soft launch as an apology for being gone ?

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taylorswift

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taylorswift nashville you have been WILD. it's always special getting to share the stage with another artist but when its with the genius/baby angel face yourusername it feels extra special!!!!

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yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername GUYS GUYs please please please don't kill me but the next single is..... a TOTAL LOVE SONG WITH ALL THE HAPPINESS. AH I know how dare I?? but I mean im in love, deal with it. (please please)

anywayy gold rush is yours at midnight friday <3

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trumanblack ew love

yourusername have they found a cure yet?? my profession of writing heartbreak songs is on the line god dammit !

ynfan1 I can't believe the love of my life is in love with someone and its NOT me

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yourusername ik the whiplash is real. you're gonna love it tho! I hope..lol!! ynfan2 wait of course I'm gonna love it, every thing you write is magic <3

ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername welll we (one of us, defo not me) had planned a long softlaunch stage which was VERY detailed, but an eagle eyed fan caught us out ! big thanks to them cause theres cool pics to post :))

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yourusername my love <33

yourusername am kinda heartbroken soft launching was fun !!

bobbyskeetz my boy is all grown up 😢

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ryanmcmahon_15 yes thank god for your very elaborate organising of pints <33 elijahhewson hey less is more sometimes ynfan1 wait this is soo cute

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lewevans man what is going on you have the taylor swift in your comments.. ryanmcmahon_15 man I've stopped questioning it, i've the taylor swift in our gaff for monthy wine nights 😂 swiftie1 those two are such icons (taylor and yn) (liked by ryanmcmahon_15)

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername just before I retreat into my home for the holidays and eat nothing but minced pies and never get out of my pjs, I thought I'd leave you guys with a parting gift from my family to yours. so much wine is a craft of love and is everything I think of when I think of the holiday season, theres some oldies, some newbies, some saddies and some friends !

a big thank you to dirtyhit as usual and the genius producers that are trumanblack, bedfordanes75 and rass75 ( all who jumped on a track also)

other friends who graced these records, taylorswift, lucydarcus, hozier and julienrbaker thank you thank you <33

also someone stepped away from the drums for a hot second and made his vocals debut, which I feel honoured about and so proud!

go listen and enjoy <333

view all comments

ryanmcmahon_15 the album and you are a work of art <3

yourusername stfu imma cry 😢

ynfan1 you write melancholy so beautifully, love it all so far!

inhalerfan1 ryan with a vocal debut?? christmas came early

inhalerfan2 obsessed with both of you, you are my parents

elijahhewson thankful everyday sir ryan chose drums or I'd be out of a job..

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joshjenkinson_ thanks for inviting us onto the album!

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-finished-

Ahh what was that you ask?? can ryan sing?? All important questions! I dont know entirely, all my fics are self-indulgent but this one was particularly bad hahah hence the all over the place plot, also im in a festive mood lol. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THO, as always let me know what you think and come chat <33

[onlymurdersintheafterparty]

OMITB S4:E10 “My Best Friend’s Wedding”

I’ve just got four words to summarize my thoughts on this episode: I love this show! Despite a season full of some predictable moments this episode still managed to deliver jaw dropping twists and reminded us of why we love the trio and The Arconia so much. I honestly don’t know where to start but I guess I should start my recap with the killer?

The answer really was that simple wow 😭 I’ve got to give the writers their props because although I did suspect it took a stuntman to jump on the windowsill like that, I never would have guessed the twist about climbing around the building on the ledge 🫢 Marshall is actually really agile for someone who only had one stunt role but I guess we can also attribute that to his backstory as a hunter and excellent marksman. Shoutout to those of you who honed in on the fact that he has 20/20 vision. I thought it was really cool that Rudy and Vince did their best to help save Mabel and I hope that Charles continues to be friends with them because he’ll need friends when Oliver spends half of his time in New Zealand.

Speaking of New Zealand, I am so glad the writers just gave her an open ending because they had me scared the whole episode that Loretta was going to be killed off 😭 When he told her in the courtyard to wait in his apartment I was so sure that would be the end of her omg. And then when she was late to walk down the aisle I was thinking “IKYFL”. I was annoyed at the silly conflict the writers came up with but I am so glad that they let those two have a beautiful, murder free wedding. I know murders happen at the drop of a hat but this time I expected another time jump or something. Also there were theories of Gravey digging up some bodies in the yard and I was really looking forward to it. I have a feeling that may be a plot point next season because we still don’t know what happened to Nicky. For all we know his wife is behind it all. Wouldn’t that be a twist? A woman killing her husband and hiring detectives to solve the case but pinning it on someone else? Also in the subreddit someone brought up the fact that Lester was mentioned or seen taking care of dry cleaning at some point so that’s one link to all of this. And with Teddy having his own criminal activity going on do we think he had a hand in some of these dealings as well? 👀 If so I hope that this means we get Theo fully on board because his snooping around for jewelry definitely has to come back into play now. There’s no telling what he may have seen and not realized in the apartments.

I still can’t believe Lester is dead. I really thought he was the mastermind behind everything but it looks like the real mastermind got to him 😩 Nicky’s wife said that he has everything to do with the building so it would be a wild plot twist if he himself was the mastermind and that’s how he’s been pulling the strings. Maybe Lester was working for him and relayed info to him as well as put in the cameras because he had access. I mentioned in my recap for episode 6 that with Lester experiencing homelessness at some point he must have encountered some interesting people. If he needed a quick buck he very well might have had a brief stint as a henchman who didn’t ask any questions. Idk I don’t think Nicky is dead and he’s my number one suspect now because his mob ties would definitely allow him to tamper with police evidence. If it turned out he dated Jan at some point too I would not be the least bit surprised.

I wouldn’t say I was a fan of Jan despite finding her really funny, but after this episode she has become a new favorite. The way that she said weeks ago that she doesn’t prefer a sniper like kill but took out Marshall the same way that he took out Sazz?!

The fact that she’s just been chilling in the passageways and Charles’ apartment the whole time is hilarious and Charles is so oblivious that he wouldn’t think much of it if she did accidentally leave some clues behind. I don’t know if they’re endgame like she says but I do love the sexual tension. I wasn’t into the Sherlock series but that’s his dynamic with Irene Adler right?

While most of my predictions did not come true, I was right about Eva’s device coming into play to help save Mabel from Marshall 😂 And I really love that things that were wanted occurred like bringing back Will and that he also walked Loretta down the aisle with Dickie. I hope they become close buds. I also said last week that I would love to see Winnie as the ring bearer and they did not disappoint! 🥺 Uma screaming because she thought she saw a roach was so on brand and I feel like she did it just to cause some drama 🤭 I think deep down she likes the trio especially since she sent the elevator back down for Charles and Mabel after the wedding.

This season has been so much fun and I’m glad to see the show that we all love come back even better than ever. I can’t wait for season five!

[bonefall]

Could you tell us some more about your Lizardstripe? It always annoyed me that the only cat in canon to point out double standards regarding kits was also the horrible mother that they blamed for all of Brokenstar’s issues. I’m glad she’s portrayed more sympathetically here though, with her friend group and role as Bluestar’s lawyer.

Anything out of BB!ShadowClan takes like, a Star Wars opening scroll of text to explain to an outsider and that's how I LIKE IT

It's my personal mission to inject nuance chemical into every woman demonized by Canon WC. Brokenstar isn't bad because he had a sad childhood or something, it was literally generations of culture turning toxic and demanding a cosmic reckoning from which he was born, moulded by, and ultimately embodied of his own free will.

Evil Women Who Weren't Good Mothers aren't responsible for his actions

Anyway, Lizardstripe.

She is gonna get her own summary at some point (I kinda want to do a ShadowClan Month at some point for the biggest ShC characters, like Nightstar, Russetfur, Stumptail, etc), but here's shards for now;

She's related to old Finchflight in some way. The timeline is getting reduxed and Finch is VERY dead by the time of TPB.

So she's either a child of his, or a niece. Finch is Yellowfang’s age (mid teens in TPB), Lizard is Bluestar's (10-ish)

She was a young mom, less than 2, she met the Forget-me-nots after she was already pregnant.

She wasn't actually raising Brokenstar, just suckling him. Ragged was doing that.

Lizard was still not a great mom. She didn't enjoy it at all, and was often getting bored and frustrated

She would often bring the kittens out into the woods on training exercises, activities they were TOO young for.

Runningkit, Deerkit, and Tanglekit were always covered in dings, bumps, ticks, and things that kept putting them in Yellowfang’s den as a result. Lizard was talked to more than once for this

When Brokenkit joined in on this, mysteriously, he was NEVER covered in dings. Like he was developing faster and was more agile than the others. Deerkit was jealous, Tanglekit thought it was AWESOME

Runningkit was developing a bit of a bully streak, realizing that he could exploit this by getting his sibs mad at him, and then hiding behind Broken

Lizard was always being forced to step in and take control of the situations by trying to break up the Dastardly Duo, but then would be OVERRULED by Raggedstar, who wanted his son to hang out with his friend

If Yellowfang didn't notice it herself, she would definitely learn through Lizard that these two should NOT be allowed to multiply their terror with power

But, that's more about them than Lizard.

She's a lot more than just someone's mom. She's a friend of Bluestar's, and the ShadowClan representative in the Forget-me-nots!

WOW her ShadowClan sense of humor is sharp. She can be VICIOUS

She often finds herself having to smooth her jokes over after making a comment that's too mean. What's just part of ShadowClan humor can be cutting to cats in other Clans

Oakheart is actually the one cat who never seems to get hurt, "i like your funny words lizardman"

She likes teasing Bluefur, she's just so easily flustered! And she cares so much about other people,

"Stars, you make me want to yack up a hairball, Bloof."

When Bluefur earns the name Bluemoon (unsure how yet) Lizardstripe b'awws that her nickname is going to be too cool now.

(In Clanmew, it's Luparfaf, Luf, vs Luparshom, Lum)

Lizardstripe and Barley Senior are the two smartest members of the group. Barley is all about logistics, schemas, building and working out plans for meeting up and not getting caught.

Lizardstripe knows what's going on in people's heads. She can be a manipulative mastermind, when she REALLY wants something.

I think she gave Blue and Hoprunner a lot of good advice on how to achieve their ambitions, but, she wasn't really interested in that extra responsibility herself

"What and have to deal with Raggedstar's wishy washy ass and his angelic brat more than i already do? I'd rather kiss a thistle."

What Lizi really liked in her life was the pleasure of it all. Sneaking around, teasing Bluefur, helping out Barley, wrestling Hoprunner. Playing games with her Clanmates, staying late at Gatherings.

She loves her freedom, the ability to decide where to spend her time

She was the first of the Forget-me-nots to die, a year or two after Bluestar took power, in a ferocious battle with WindClan.

Current draft: Talltail's son, Flytail, killed her violently in Heatherstar's Last Stand, the decisive battle that truly "ended" the Mothermouth Moorland War.

After that battle, ShadowClan lost a strategic area and could never regain their foothold. Raggedstar tried to surrender the next year, which was when Brokentail killed him.

Lizardstripe and Mudfoot being lost in the same year was one of the things he and Runningnose cited to each other as "reasons why" WindClan had to pay

If they died for nothing, if SO many had just fought in a war they lost... then it was all for nothing.

Warriors don't accept peace deals.

They fight, they fight to the last cat standing.

I think the news hit all of the Forget-me-nots hard. They hadn't met up in a while, their ambitions driving them apart over time, but... that didn't make it less difficult. No one thought she would be the first.

I think she's my favorite of the little friend group tbh, I'm fond of the Angel Lawyer Friend.

[riahinreallife]

First off I just wanna say this is my first post and I hope people enjoy

Summary: a girl goes to a club. She notices her phone is missing when she goes outside. A cute guy goes after her because he found her phone. She asks him to help her find a bus and the ride the bus together in the same sit on a crowded bus....

That Night

That night at the club I saw him. I saw him a couple times actually. I was mostly on the dance floor but every time I went to the bar for another drink you were there. You were cute. I thought to myself 'we could definitely get along'. I wonder if you think that we could. Later that night when I was drunk out of my mind still at the club I decided it was time to leave. As soon as I walk out of the door the cold air hits me like a hard smack across the face. It actually sobers me up a little. Not nearly enough though. I stumbled a little. I grab on to the club wall and slide down. My legs are not able to hold me up any longer. "Fuck. I need to get home..." I run my fingers through my hair. I leave my hands on my face. I hear someone run out of the club. I keep my head down. "Hey you alright?" A voice calls out. I whip my head up. It's you. The guy from the bar. " Oh uh.. yeah. I need to find my phone, I need to get home" I look up at you. "That's actually why I came out here." He pulls out a phone from his pocket. "I'm assuming it's your because the lock screen seems to have you and I'm assuming your friends, on it." "Oh my God. Yes! This is my phone! Thank you!" I stand up still a little wobbly. "You're a life saver" "more of just a phone saver." "I would quite literally die without my phone" "I guess I just saved you life" "yeah you really did. Thank you again." "Of course. Not much I could do with it anyway." "Yeah. I gotta get home. Do you know a bus I could catch or something. I'm not around this part of town often." "Yeah, I'll show you the way I need to get home anyway too." "Thank you so much." I say as I follow you as we walk to a bus.

"It's really no problem. This might be awkward, but could I possibly get your number?" "Yeah, of course. You saved my night. Plus you're cute." We exchange numbers as we continue to walk. After a while of walking I try to break the silence. "Soo... Wanna do some ice breakers?" "Sure, what's your favorite color" "lavender, yours?" "Navy blue" "how about your job" "I always wanted to be a firefighter when I was a little boy." After a little while of talking and ice breakers we reach our destination. "Here we are" he announces. We are at a bus station. There's a bench. We sit down and wait. "Are you getting on the bus as well?" I say out of pure curiosity. "Yeah, gotta get home." "I was hoping so. Some people on the bus are a little..." "Crazy." "Yeah.." "don't worry. I get it. There's a lot of creeps out there. I try to make women feel safe. I try to sit away from them so they don't overthink anything." "Wow you're a mastermind aren't you?" I say sarcastically. He just shrugs. I'm mostly sober at this point. Not completely though. I don't know if it's alcohol, or if I'm ovulating, maybe it's both but I'm longing for this man's touch. Not like an improper touch, just a small touch. Like a hand on the shoulder or knee. I feel the thigh is stretching it a bit but I wouldn't be mad. It's the only thing I can think about. It doesn't take long for the bus to get there. It's packed full of people. I eventually find a set. The man that I don't even know the name of can't seem to find a seat. I offer for him to sit next to me. He sits down. I put my earbuds in and lean my head against the window. The cold of the window feels so nice on my face. The bus lights turn off and we are on our way. The darkness of the bus is comforting. Silently I still long for his touch. A new song starts when I feel his hand rest slightly above my knee. I slowly look over to him. He's not looking at me. I put my head back on the cold window. Although this time it's not so cold. Your hand gives me warmth it shouldn't. I feel warmth creep to my cheeks. I try to focus on this song. At this moment the song seems so stupid. The song fades into the background. All I can focus on is his hand. Still I don't look but I can't feel anything else but the warmth of him hand. It's kinda.. comforting. Sooner than I'd like, it's his stop. He stands up and the warmth of his hand leaves with him. Now I'm left on the bus alone and cold. I want him to come back. I want to feel the warmth of his hand again. I want the warmth of his mouth. I hope I can run into him again. Better yet I can text him.

Note: I will most likely be writing more to this story but I have school and write mostly on weekends.

[asherlockstudy]

HEY FRIENDS

Literally one year ago I made a vague post and a few people asked me what I meant, but I felt a little drained at the time and never explained but as GME3 is fast approaching, I am re-emerging with the questionable decision to write my thoughts on GME2. 

Bear in mind that some of the points might be negative as I have explained my conflicted feelings about this show before however don't let that discourage you from reading it because there's more to it than the negative points, trust me. Also, the post is GIF heavy so I put the rest of it under the cut.

GME2 thoughts: 

Rhett and Link can’t tell the difference between an evening show and a soft Only Fans account. I didn’t mind anything in the show (except for that sex doll with the fucked up eyes that creep me out),  I just...don’t understand completely: who came up with this project, how genuinely RandL like it and how it relates to their occasional irritation against shippers. 

In other words, for people who proclaim they don’t understand why people ship them, acting out explicit fanfics is a bold decision to say the least.

Like, the whole concept of the show is for them to drink so their boundaries go down and then when somebody goes a bit off the rails, everyone is like “oh no” and facepalming. What’s up with that? Either embrace the concept of your show or don’t do it at all. I mean, nothing was truly much except for the fanfic enactment which was a bit much, if you ask me, perhaps mostly because I can’t tell how comfortable they are with it. Sometimes, especially Rhett just doesn’t look totally okay with it. So why do it? For the extra fee? Really? Wow. As an example, neither Rhett nor Link felt okay with sucking Chase’s toes and, guess what, Chase didn’t want it either. Who’s the mastermind behind all that... And has Chase gotten his raise yet?

Let’s go to Rhett. I might be wrong but I have noticed that for his size, Rhett is kinda a lightweight. One beer and his eyes are glassy, his cheeks round and red. In the last GME, he had refrained from drinking because he wanted to handle the situation in case Link lost it. This time, 7 shots and a few more drinks during the show weren’t enough to make him drunk, or as drunk as Link, or make him lose himself into the moment and have fun. Conclusion: Rhett is not very comfortable with this project. Rhett is afraid of Link being unhinged. Why is he afraid of an unhinged Link? What can Link say or do that Stevie wouldn’t be able to handle and he would have to step in? It’s plain throughout the show that Rhett is constantly concerned about what Link might say next. What on earth can a Southern ex-hardcore Evangelist married at 20 say that is giving Rhett nightmares?

 Rhett confirming that Link does the fibonacci when he shaves his face lol Do they often talk about fibonacci shaving? Does he remember it from 20 years ago? How often does Link shave in the creative house? Questions, questions, questions...

Rhett fully knowing that Link had a story about hurting his dick. Link clarifying he meant one when he was alone. Rhett warning him “I am just looking out for you”. Thus, Rhett knowing Link hurt his dick when he was with somebody else and considered it a story that Link would regret revealing. So, is Rhett having nightmares because Link hurt his dick when he was with Christy and if so, why? No??? Notice Rhett getting lowkey tortured until Link finally wraps up his silly harmless story. He lost five years of life there. 

Link saying he wishes his Christy buttcheek tattoo faded away... because “this would symbolise the long time they have been together”. Okay... all right.

 Rhett confirmed as an ass man besides a vagina man. Like, just as he was saying he was always so fascinated by vaginas he almost gave them supernatural qualities, he now pretty much said the asshole is divine design! Link bumped Rhett’s shoulder at the mention of anal preference, pointing at him, once more giving Rhett a scare. (BTW the truth is Rhett is an #anything_goes man let’s be real XD)

Link non-verbally proclaimed them both “team ass” but not with Rhett’s consent. 

Link said at two points in the aftershow that Rhett made him uncomfortable but I can’t for the life of me understand what he was talking about and it seems Rhett did neither. There was probably something that flew over my head entirely...

That’s just funny but Link in the end saying “After fucking all these years, we’re still surprising your ass”. This is not even a Freudian slip, this is a Freudian syntax! Next level shit XD Meanwhile Rhett: 

#When ten drinks are not enough to save you from Link's syntax

And now let’s go to the sequence I was referring to in the previous (one year old) vague post:

The Bean daddy fic enactment was initially a thing of cuteness, indeed, but I have the suspicion there was more going on. Let’s see it step by step.

The cute thing started because Link somehow played the role of tentative Link shyly revealing his deeper feelings with exceptional skill. It was also cute when Rhett, while still impersonating fic!Rhett basically implored Link to not drop chocolate syrup on his clothes, hair and beard. He was having fun with it and he was being flirtatious and affectionate towards Link, though, again he was still supposedly imitating his fic version.

Link received passively Rhett’s flirty show, with moderate amusement. However, it is very important to note that he was nodding affirmatively throughout Rhett’s flirty request. He had a face saying “okay, I understand, I am not gonna drop the chocolate all over you”. That's important to keep in mind.

Notice how Rhett asks Link to take care how he'll pour the syrup in character while Link is amused but also nods affirmatively that he does not intent to screw Rhett's outfit.

As soon as Rhett trusts Link won’t screw him like that, he drops his head back and opens his mouth waiting for the chocolate syrup. Then Link tells him seriously to hold on, he immediately changes to a sexy imitation of Rhett’s open mouth, saying something like “I just want to acknowledge…” Rhett raises his head, “Yess???”, still in the flirty silly mood, probably believing Link is improvising within the fic’s context. But Link says: “Don’t assume the position just yet, because I would like to respond to that”. At this point, clearly Link doesn't follow the script. Rhett waits but he is still in the flirty amused mode. Link does this characteristic hand motion which means something very clear “All jokes aside, I want to talk about something serious now”. Rhett takes note of Link’s hand gesture but he still doesn’t drop his flirty persona. Link announces to Rhett: “This is a test.” Rhett is clearly too far gone enjoying the fic enactment. He nods without clearly understanding. “This is a test…”, he agrees, nodding, until finally his brain catches up. “………of whaaaaat?”, he asks half-fic like, half-suspicious.

Notice Link's serious gesture and Rhett becoming suspicious literally mid-sentence after Link says "this is a test".

Link starts to mouth something but immediately changes it and says slowly and cautiously: “Of my ability to be your true friend”. Rhett’s amusement is gone. He dismisses Link hastily, mumbling “I believe it” and assumes the position again. Link insists though, inching closer. “Because…”, he starts. Rhett immediately closes his mouth and turns to face Link alarmed. It seemed to me he felt vulnerable to wait there with an open mouth and Link so close.

Notice Rhett dismissing Link and how quickly he closes his mouth once Link gets closer.

Link continued slowly, trying to fill the lack of words with facial expressions translatable only to Rhett and not us. “Because… the most entertaining thing to do… would be…”. “No, no it actually wouldn’t be”, Rhett countered quickly and still somewhat softly but there was fear and panic in his eyes in that moment. My assumption is that he was still being soft in order to not rile up the mildly inebriated Link too much. Rhett continued: "It would be the opposite of what you're actually thinking".

Link tries to communicate with faces (including puckered lips) instead of fully formed sentences but Rhett understands. He's neither flirty nor amused anymore. He asserts what Link thought to do - the test, "the abilty of being his true friend", would have the exact opposite result from entertainement.

Link doesn't drop it just yet. He asks Rhett if he really knows what Link is thinking about. Rhett hums affirmatively. But Link says: "Cause I was thinking about being the hero by just putting it in your mouth and not getting it all over you. But now you are just telling me to get it all over you." Of course this is a lie. Rhett spent so much time making it clear he does not want syrup all over himself. Link nodded so many times, making it clear he understood and agreed. He made the gesture meaning "I am gonna talk about something different and more important". So, the test that he wanted to acknowledge that this whole skit was about was something different. But in the end he saw how negative Rhett was to the idea and quickly twisted his statements, now saying it was all about whether he would drop the chocolate on his...true friend or not, which makes no sense whatsoever as statements go and it is redundant, since it was established and agreed upon literally seconds before that he would not do it.. Rhett says something I can't catch, like "no, I know what you were thinking" or "no, you won't do what you're thinking" or something similar. Link then repeats in his twist of words that Rhett essentially urges him to drop the chocolate all over him and he has that rabid look he sometimes has near Rhett. Rhett then, again with his mouth open, says: "Okay, it's time. We've milked this moment enough". Rhett clearly tries to bring Link to his senses and avoid this moment lingering too much in people's memory.

Link is bummed at Rhett's refusal however not "wounded type" of bummed. I guess it was more like, tipsy Link threw an idea out there, Rhett reacted poorly to it and Link was done like "okay it's on you that this test won't happen" but then got on with everything without more drama.

What was that test?

Well, repeating Link's words:

I would just like to acknowledge... This is a test. Of my ability to be your true friend. The most entertaining thing to do... would be...

Does anyone know whether there was more in this fic? Perhaps something more in it that Link wanted to acknowledge but Rhett didn't want enacted?

Maybe what Link wanted to test as "potentially the most entertaining thng to do" was his initiative alone? And it would be proof of Link being Rhett's true... friend. And Rhett knew what Link had in mind but he was adamant that it would have the exact opposite effect on the audience than what Link expected.

Hmm. I leave you to your thoughts and your mental preparation for GME3.

[sweetpupppyangel]

My friend Jean pranked me so good yesterday I can’t get over it she’s an evil mastermind

So a few days ago we were prank calling our exes off my phone and they had been calling me back all day trying to figure out who we were and stuff. One of the ppl we pranked was her ex who happens to also be my next door neighbor. He had called me twice after school trying to figure out who I was and I kept trolling because fuck you think this is I’m not j telling u who I am. So at about midnight I get a call from an unknown number saying it was the neighbor and saying he knew it was me and to come outside. And hoe I was terrified. He started off saying “I know ur that girl who lives next to me come outside” and then he was talking about some “let me eat that pussy” and GIRL I WAS SO SCARED ion know how by this point I didn’t realize it was j my hg pranking me because she’s always saying shit like that but the guy was her ex so I just assumed they might’ve just had a similar sense of humor but anyways I hung up on him and started frantically texting my friends like “YALL HELP THE KILLER OUTSIDE BE FINNA GHET ME” and my friend Vi says “yeah I got called too he said he knows where I live etc.” I still don’t know if Vi was as gullible as me but like I was convinced that we were being tracked down so me and her call and we’re talking abt it and then the no caller id number calls again so I add him to the call with Vi and I and he’s still talking abt “tee come outside so I can eat dat pussy I’m on ur doorstep let me in the window you let *my ex* in” So I’m terrified Vi is laughing and then he hangs up and jean joins the call and was so convincing acting like it wasn’t her like ts was so genius she’s such a good actor and mind u I’m still frantic thinking this pussy eater freak is outside ma house and she finally says it was a prank and I felt so stupid but like wow I’ve never been pranked that good in my life

Am I stupid?

How do I prank her back?

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Books I’ve read so far in 2023!

Friend me on Goodreads here to follow my more up to date reading journey for the year!

___

180. Hotline by Dimitri Nasrallah--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I knew I wanted to read HOTLINE from the moment I saw the cover and read the synopsis months ago. It offered everything I love in literary fiction: Immigration, a character growing through their experiences, and an interesting point of view that differs from my own when it comes to the immigration experience.

Reading HOTLINE was like seeing a story from the perspective of my immigrant parents. Much like the son in Nasrallah's novel, I came to Canada at a young age. My parents fought tooth and nail to make ends meet and to make sure I had a better future than the life they left behind. Our country wasn't war-torn, but it was going through a special period where food was incredibly scarce and the police handed out jail sentences for too many things. Many people had "one foot at home and one foot in jail" because of all the side hustles they had to do in a country that frowned upon that.

So, seeing a mother striving to do what she could with what little resources she had was incredibly eye-opening. Making the incredibly hard decision of leaving a child alone so you can provide for them was another relatable instance. HOTLINE was such a captivating exploration of how parents sacrifice and compromise in the present for a hopefully better future. It is a complicated story of grief for both someone lost and a dream destroyed by the stereotypes and biases that live in a new country.

It was also jarring to see how life might have been like in the 80s in comparison to today's society, much like the differences between the 90s (when we immigrated) and today. The hustle was real, but (in this case) it paid off in the end--which was a welcome surprise, even if it wasn't entirely a roses and rainbows story. I liked the reality of how messy life can be and how even though a job we never thought we'd have is the only thing keeping you in a less-than-perfect home.

HOTLINE also had a unique level of community that I loved to see. It proves that a village-full of support makes a massive difference. While there were moments of the MC's self-doubt and fear, there were many moments where the reader is reminded that hope can exist even in the darkest moments.

I felt like I was catching a glimpse into a real home and I'm so grateful for the opportunity. Beautifully written! I highly recommend this, especially for those who are constantly seeking out immigration stories.

___

181. Some Shall Break by Ellie Marney--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I loved the first book in this series (duology?), so I was so incredibly delighted to see that there was a sequel!

I think one of the huge benefits that the first book had was that I knew absolutely nothing about it. I wasn't expecting it to be a YA fictional version of MINDHUNTER, which was an incredibly intriguing nonfiction text about how Forensic Profiling came to be and the process behind it. Seeing a fictional story from a teen POV was interesting and darkly fun.

In this sequel, we don't get as much of that exploration that we did with book one, instead we're mainly focusing on catching the one big bad person and while there are cameos and many, many twists and turns, it wasn't as great of a read as the first one.

This isn't to say that I didn't still enjoy this book! I remember thinking, "Wow, I really do enjoy this author's writing." I was hooked and I really wanted to see where the story would take these characters. It was also kind of sad seeing where trauma can take a person and how far they are willing to go to run from said trauma.

There was a certain level of madness to this book and the evil mastermind behind some of the characters. My mind is doing a bunch of twists and turns just trying to write this review.

I highly recommend the first book in this series, especially with the Fall season upon us. Spook yourself with a YA crime thriller. I think knowing that this is YA makes it all that much more creepier.

___

182. The Book of Accidents by Chuck Wendig--⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

I've been eyeing THE BOOK OF ACCIDENTS ever since it came out. I wanted to read it, but I won't lie: the size of it intimidated the hell out of me. I finally bit the bullet when another book I was reading recommended it and I thought, "Why not? It's the perfect season for it."

I'm glad I finally read it, if not for the creepy atmosphere of it, but for the writing itself and how reminiscent it was of Stephen King. I love a good spooky King novel and this one delivered!

Some of the twists in this book were a bit wild, but they all worked together in the end. By the conclusion of the book, the length made sense because we needed to get a well-rounded story. However, during the reading of the story, I did start wondering when it would end. I enjoyed the multiple perspectives, but I kept thinking, "Okay, what's next? Why do I still have five hours left in this audiobook?"

I DO think the concept of THE BOOK OF ACCIDENTS was really intriguing, especially when we start to consider the potential meanings behind the book. Wendig's novel explores boyhood and the consequences of actions and generational trauma. The What-if's of THE BOOK OF ACCIDENTS is probably, to me, the best part because we get to meet a cast of characters that give us a bigger picture of what could have been.

By the end, I did have some questions that were left unanswered, but for the most part, it was a pretty satisfying conclusion. I didn't like the mom and how her mentality worked at times--but it also shows how imperfect we can be as humans. I think that's one of the things I love the most about Horror. Too often we look for the shock and awe in the genre, but forget how complex the exploration of humanity can be in Horror.

Anyway, I'd recommend it if you're a fan of Stephen King. While Wendig isn't exactly as verbose as King, his ability to set a mood and a setting was very reminiscent of the Horror master. If you don't mind the length, then definitely add this one to your TBR list!

___

183. The Lamb Will Slaughter the Lion by Margaret Killjoy--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I really enjoyed Killjoy's novella and how it creeped me out while reading it in the middle of the night. Although short, it felt heavy enough that I couldn't read this in just one sitting. Which is both a good and eh thing.

The heaviness of the novella is a good thing because it means that I felt like the pages held a lot of meaning. THE LAMB WILL SLAUGHTER THE LION explored grief, the power of love (as cliche as that sounds), family, society and its downsides, and of course, the topic of Power. What does it mean to have power? What do the different kinds of power look like?

The heaviness of the novella can be a bad thing because it sometimes lost my interest. I felt like even though it was short, it lagged in some parts. I wanted answers, but the writing sometimes felt cluttered enough that the answers were always on the next page and, sigh, I was already worn out from reading what I had just read. This is most definitely a me problem, but having just come off two novellas that didn't give me this issue, I found it noticeable enough to note in this review.

I AM super excited for the sequel, though. The way things were left at the end of this book had me genuinely excited to see where Killjoy takes the story!

The characters were all interesting and occasionally morally grey (as can so often happen when magic is involved alongside the concerns we may have for modern-day society), and the topics explored were timely and interesting. If you're looking for an entertaining Queer horror novella with a beautiful cover, then this one is for you!

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184. The Salt Grows Heavy by Cassandra Khaw--⭐️⭐️

I'm either too dumb to understand this book, or I'm one of the few who fell through the cracks with this one and just didn't enjoy it. Some of my friends have read this and they've all enjoyed it thoroughly. Me? I read this and as I'm writing this review, I still have no idea what this book was about.

I know the...general gist of it. But for the most part, this was a blur and I'm lowkey disappointed because I really enjoyed Khaw's haunted previous book.

I'm glad others were able to enjoy this so thoroughly, but it was truly not for me.

___

185. Those Across the River by Christopher Buehlman--⭐️

THOSE ACROSS THE RIVER, at its core, had an interesting story premise. Did it have creepy moments? Yes, it certainly did. There were some scenes that were downright gruesome and I'm sure will serve as someone's nightmare fuel. The pacing was great and the twists were entertaining, if a bit predictable. So, why am I giving this a one star rating? Well...

As a historical fiction Horror novel, I expected some of the language in this book. Having read some of Stephen King's older books, I'm no stranger to derogatory language in the Horror genre--especially when they're historical fiction novel. This book, however, was published in 2011 and used racial slurs with such relish that I started to flinch at the words (not that I normally don't--I do, but it was so prominent in this book that it started to overshadow some of the Horror of the book.)

I've also never commented on the descriptions of women in older Horror books because well...given the time they were written in, it was expected. I don't condone it, but some of these books are truly a product of their time. But a book published in 2011 referring to a woman as a dog during sex and then just...treating her as both a sexual and plot device in this book was...a lot. And the irony is how strong she is as a character in her own right. This strength could have been further explored if she had been given a chance by Buehlman. Instead, she is first the property of one man at a young age and then the property of another man, who dehumanizes her during sex.

"Dayla, the book is set in the 1930's!" That's fine, but you can write a woman set in that time without dehumanizing her like you're writing her character in a 70's-80's era of Horror.

So, while the horror of the book is creepy and the twists were great, there were some jarring moments of discomfort in this book that were too much for even me, a King fan. (And that's saying a lot, because those who've read older King know how messed up his writing can be.)

ALSO: Super creepy how there is a scene where a FOURTEEN year old girl catches the male main character's attention. And he actively has to remind himself that SHE IS FOURTEEN. I had finished writing my review and had to come back to add this because I had blocked it out of my head. She is described as "simple", I believe, and while he catches himself "flirting" with her, his wife mentions that she's a little jealous. Like, wtf. LMAO.

Anyway, read this if you'd like, but be prepared. I don't know if I'll read more stuff by this author. We shall see!

___

186. I Survived the Joplin Tornado by Lauren Tarshis--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I knew close to nothing about this tornado, but it was definitely fascinating to read about it, especially from the perspective of a child!

I think one of the things that makes these books a bit of a challenge for an adult to read (me, I am this adult) is the suspension of disbelief. I'm glad these characters always have hopeful endings full of miracles, especially because the readers these are targeted for are super impressionable. But...the more I read of these, the harder it is for me to believe all the happy endings. I'm definitely happy that characters like the mc in this one are able to walk away from this disaster, but it's just something I've been noticing.

Maybe I'm growing a little jaded from these books LOL.

___

187. Don't Fear the Reaper by Stephen Graham Jones--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Oh this book was FUN. Yes, the context is dark and murderous, but this one definitely had a lot more going on in it (action-wise) than the first book. I didn't know what to expect with this one because while I enjoyed the first book, I definitely thought it was more of a slow burn horror. This one dived right into the horror!

If you've ever watched the SCREAM movies from the very first one, then you are familiar with Sidney's progression as a character. We see her go through so many stages of PTSD and during all of that, she becomes the ultimate Final Girl. We see the same thing with Jade, the MC of THE INDIAN LAKE trilogy. Her denial, PTSD, and disassociation with her past self was unexpected but also realistic. She's the one who cried wolf once, wasn't believed, and now is watched again to see if she will cry wolf again. She has the pressure of being a survivor and she tries over and over again to pass on that legacy to someone else who could potentially be another Final Girl.

Jones's novel takes place during the holidays, which means that we are in a blizzard of snow and blood. Imagine if all of the killing in the first book were spread out throughout a whole novel and you'll have a better understanding of just how wicked this book was. It felt like I was reading a cursed sequel of a horror classic that was actually...really, really good? It was campy, heartfelt, had many twists, and some pretty intriguing Indigenous touches that made this all the more unique.

I so highly recommend DON'T FEAR THE REAPER. It was such a great read for the Autumn season (any season really), and lived up to my expectations. Will definitely be picking up the final book in the trilogy when it comes out!

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Have you read any of these books? Let me know your thoughts!

___

Happy reading!

[sock-to-the-third]

The Meet Cute Diary

By Emery Lee (e/em)

I cried.

Happy crying but I did. I knew coming into reading Lee’s fantastic story that one of the characters used neo-pronouns so it wasn’t a surprise with Devin.

But fuck, fam, like… you never know how much you need to see rep until you see it.

*sighs*

Yeah.

… Moving on. It’s a young adult novel staring teenagers. Admittedly, I haven’t had as much luck connecting with romance focused novels. Nothing against them, they just normally aren’t my cup of tea but The Meet Cute Diary… fuck, is it good.

1. Narrator

It’s first person perspective with Noah (he/him) as our lead. Such an opinionated, bullheaded fucker I love him to bits. Kiddo just kills it stealing the show wherever he goes. From his passion of his trans-love blog to the way he brings out such personality in other characters— it reminds me what a vibe of a time being a teenager is.

2. Trans stuff

Also. Binders. I did not expect a discussion about binders. Got me all nostalgic of my old binder & sports bra so tight it bruised. What a shitty time to be alive watching the clock to make sure you don’t pass the 8 hour mark and break a rib.

It’s so cool how Lee represents trans-mascs. It’s just real matter of fact. I also like how we get to see a trans-masc that isn’t masc-4-masc and super macho. It’s just so fun seeing Noah running around being his little queer self.

Honestly surprised me that there wasn’t some drop like “oh his parents are horrible” or “passable- but kinda dicks.” Weird to see that much acceptance. I kept on thinking “wow, this sounds like wish fullfillment” - entirely forgetting some trans folks just live. Like.. with loving families and I’m like.. noice 👍

Also, the fact that Devin shares eir pronouns without a disclaimer of where it’s okay. I feel old at 26 because you didn’t just blanket “yeah neo-pronouns wherever.” Like, especially if you were baby with pronouns, often you’d only do it around friends awhile. I wonder if the next gen will be like that.

3. Plot twists

I love how Drew’s arc plays out. It has all the corniness of a romance as things slowly devolve. *chiefs kiss*

The two have such awesome banter. Plus the way it devolves is so ouch, love it. I was surprised Drew lied about how long the divorce thing was happening. Thought Lee was going to go a different angle.

Also, totally convinced that Drew was the OG troll and in charge of the article— some wicked mastermind. In hindesight, I’m really glad Drew was less a Moriarty and more just an asshole.

It made the transition between the end of Drew and the start of Devin’s relationship with Noah, realization of love and Noah figuring out a new purpose for the diary to hit home.

It’s not like rom com drama but it hits the kind of beats that makes you shriek and laugh with joy. I’m really happy how it turned out and the surprises along the way.

4. Devine’s Meet Cute

Can we talk about Devin’s surprise for Noah and just how adorable it is? The kiddo had panic attacks and socializing is an ouchy point and the fucker went out, overnight talked to 5 people, one of them a stranger, to set up this elaborate scavenger hunt.

If I didn’t have roommates 🙏 I would’ve screamed that whole motherfucking chapter, it was so dang good!

FUCK! I LOVE THIS GOD DAMN BOOK!

*flips a table*

GAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!

…

Anyway, 10/10 book.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Danganronpa 3 Despair arc episode 8

Thonks.

Annnd Junko has already gotten to Mikan.

I'll say it makes way more sense to me that someone would join Junko.

Than so done wanting to join Munakata.

Junko's cruel but she's very good at making someone feel like she cares about them. She finds people who the world ignores or belittles and is able to get them to trust her.

And she'll build them up as much as she'll shatter them, and it'll get to the point they depend on her.

Much like Mukuro.

While Munakata has these big ideas but he screams of entertainment. Like first game Byakuya if he never developed or made any friends.

People who think the world owes them a favour.

The fact Munakata managed to get a hold of two people who adore and would lay down their lives for him, is insane.

Gotta wonder what the hell he did to them. Because that is not healthy nor normal.

I think it's interesting because he and Junko are very similar individuals, in terms of how they view and treat others for their own goals.

Anyway, back to this.

Is... That the last supper but everyones a Monokuma and it's a puzzle?

Okay than.

And than she throws it, because of course she does.

The pieces falling over the faces of the 77th class.

I like that, it's clever.

And the dig at Ryota for not wanting to go to the celebration.

I think the person I'm the most afraid and curious to see interact with Junko, is Nagito.

That's gonna be interesting, because even by Remnant status, that boy ain't right.

The reserve course kids crowding the gates of the main building, honestly I don't blame them.

They were all used by the school.

I know Hajime was selected but any one of these kids could've become Izuru Kamakura.

We saw that with Natsume, just how far people are willing to go.

Wasn't expecting Ryota to figure out that Mikan is being brainwashed, or the footage from the student council killing game.

Yeah throwing up at the sight of that is the most normal reaction to this shit.

People laughed at Makoto screaming and than passing at the sight of Sayaka's body, that is the proper way to respond.

I'm not mock him for being unable to comprehend that Junko did this, because honestly its a lot.

We're so used to Junko that remembering a time we didn't know she was the mastermind is wild, because it was insane when we and the survivors found out.

It was unfathomable that someone who was their friend and classmate could do something so horrific to them.

Man theres a lot of rants in this one.

Confirmation the student council was a test run, wild thing to say but yeah given the later games production it makes sense.

I don't know how Mikan got brainwashed watching this video, presumably it was this one, and Ryota's okay but idk maybe they'll explain it later.

Also wow... There's a lot of reserve course students. I didn't think that there would be that many but in hind sight, yeah makes sense.

Definitely makes the project worse.

Ohhh there climbing the gates.

... Wait... That kid... That just showed for like a second glance.

Was that... Matsuda? Yasuke Matsuda, Junko's boyfriend.

... I didn't know he was in this.

Which I guess doesn't make sense because he clearly helped her with everything. But I've never seen him, ever I have heard of Danganronpa Zero but I've never gone into it.

I know, my bad.

Hmm that makes things interesting, if that actually was him because he's the Ultimate Neurologist and she's brainwashing people.

I know he had a hand in the memory wipes but not this.

.... Maybe don't mention that you went on a date with Izuru.

Wasn't expecting this discussion on student protests.

Yeah listen to Chisa guys you'll be fine... From the reserve course students that is... Although... Maybe not.

Man watching them try and just sweep this all under the rug like it was absolutely inhuman and disgusting, is vile.

I have no sympathy for Hopes Peak or it's staff in regards to this.

Especially those who were involved with the Kamakura project.

Because even those who weren't still are trying to brush off multiple student deaths.

It's fucked up.

Mikan... Noooo back away. This got very uncomfortable.

I never thought I'd be glad for Junko wacking Mikan across the head with a chair... But yeah, that was... Ahhh.

... I forgot how uncomfortable despair Mikan is... I'm getting despair disease flashbacks.

I love how the execution music went off.

Teacher Junko giving a presentation on why Ryota should help with the "mutual killing video."

Mikan being the test subject suddenly makes everything make more sense.

Poor Mikan.

Oh fuck so Junko manipulated Ryota into helping her so she wouldn't go after his class... Man...

Knowing she does just that anyway... And that he will live to see it, God that's awful.

"Alas my 12 zodiac generals" Gundam showing up with 12 hamsters on his arm.

Love it.

And Nagito has returned.

No one cares, poor Nagito but your not Mikan.

He didn't recognise Hiyoko because she's taller now, love that.

And they're all going to help her.

Wait, why does Nagito need to talk with Peko.

At least they left a note this time when they all left class.

Juzo kicking around reserve course students saying they should know their place.

Ew.

And Munakata's here, great.

You know I think Gundam's onto something with his whole Mikan may be devoured by the gates of purgatory, definitely seems that way.

Nekomaru having 2 umbrellas is everything.

I do love that the whole class went to find her, I'm just... I don't think this gonna be a fun discovery.

Are you fucking kidding me? Of course it's Nagito who accidentally finds a secret passage

Of course it's him.

He knows, he absolutely knows.

"I didn't do anything you've got to believe me."

Oh Ryota... Oh this poor boy. He's just sat in the dark looking absolutely terrified and begging these guys to know he's innocent.

I feel so bad for him, he looks and sounds absolutely terrified.

The guilt he feels and knowing it's going to get so much worse... God..

Mini Miyazaki is a fun nickname tho.

And Junko's here.

I wonder if Junko knows her class by now and knows Makoto's talent, because if so her reaction to hearing Nagito's talent is so much funnier.

Just, so bored.

OH so that's why Nagito needed to speak to Peko, so she can keep Mukuro busy.

Good idea, how he knew about her is beyond me but damn.

Nagito you shady bitch.

I forgot how scary and creepy Mukuro can be, like Junko takes the reins and the cake for being the worst of the two, but man.

Can see the family resemblance.

Okay but when she yelled "which pisses me off" she even sounded like Junko, but not the same..

Which is cool because it shows she has the capability to imitate Junko, which she will do in the first game.

I know they have the same voice actor, but I still find it cool how similar but distinct they are even down to their voices.

Man all we need is Sakura and this would be the best 3 way duel in history.

Awh Ryota... He's just staring into nothing repeating that he hasn't done anything.

Annnd Nagito is hope speeching.

Man, I can't believe it's been so long but I should've expected it.

I WASN'T EXPECTING THE GUN THO

WAAAAAT!!!

Who gave Nagito a gun?! Why does Nagito a gun?! What is happening?!

I thought he was just gonna start preaching, nope... Man's got a gun.

The Russian roulette game in the second game is never gonna feel the same after this.

Oh he just found it over seas? Where were you that you just found a gun?

Good to know Nagito is against killing people but will if he has to... Man he just waltzed into this episode out of nowhere and it is instantly so much more chaotic.

Somehow.

If he had just shot her, that would be the end of everything. Mukuro night go insane but yeah, that would've solved a lot.

Lot of people would've lived.

Makoto would be a loooot less traumatised.

"Your the biggest hope fan boy I've ever met." Oh so she doesn't know about Makoto yet.

Although yeah Nagito is definitely worse.

Izuru showing up too.

What was that, hope spidey sence?

Guns jammed, typical.

Oh no way Izuru has ultimate luck as well... Confirmed 3rd luck boy.

I know he has talents, that's his thing but genuinely wasn't expecting them to include luck. Because so many people even the people with that talent don't consider it one.

Here's the confirmation it indeed was one.

I know he's gonna be fine but wow Nagito got shot.

Ryota screaming in the background, I hope this therapy... A lot of it.

Kid just wanted to draw anime.

And Nagito's okay.

Ryota got out! But the others are still in there. I keep saying it but poor guy, I didn't give too shits about him before now and now... Now I just wanna give him a hug.

It's gonna be a miracle if Ryota doesn't end up with the same amount of survivors guilt as Makoto.

Not too worried about Chisa because we know she survives this but it's still tense.

And end credits scene... Where Chiaki recognises Hajime.

Well you found him.

The whiplash this episode is giving me...

[lichengills]

Hey you, wanna hear my headcanons for the interns/junior agents that I came up with while in the car for 8 hours?

My main reason for writing these down is for future writing prompts. I haven’t done any psychonauts writings yet, but I want to at some point cause *slaps game like car salesmen* this bad boy can fit so much found family in it.

So I don’t know if we have canon ages for the interns, but I think it’s safe to say that these guys are teenagers. All of them falling into that 14-16 demographic. I think Sam would be the youngest and Adam would be the oldest.

I also don’t know if it’s ever stated if Lizzie or Norma is the oldest of the sisters (Or if they’re twins? Point is I can’t find much so I guess it’s up to interpretation). But I like to think that Norma is the older sister, only by a year. But that won’t stop her from holding that over Lizzie constantly.

Speaking of Lizzie, considering that her sister is a perfectionist always sneaking her way into being what Lizzie calls, ‘a teacher’s pet’, this sort of feeds into her whole rebellious attitude. She’s got that “my older sister is so perfect and if I’m gonna be overshadowed might as well use it to my advantage”. Since everyone seemed focused on Norma, it allowed Lizzie to get away with things they wouldn’t approve of like causing trouble. They used to be close growing up, but as Norma separated herself from Lizzie for her reputation, Lizzie just embraced her role as the “weirdo outcast”.

Norma on the other hand? Very gifted child syndrome. She was always a good grades student who didn’t have many friends and was probably made fun of for it. But it’s not like she cared, cause Norma snuck her way to the top and was on good graces with almost every adult. But deep down? She really doesn’t want to slip up. I imagine the main reason she went after Razputin more than the others was because she knew that he had the potential to overshadow her. She wants to keep her title of being the best intern around, and she’s not ready to give that up to a ten year old that showed up out of the blue. Because if she’s not a gifted student, then she’s nothing.

Wow okay a good chunk is just Lizzie and Norma, so let’s cut to just headcanons based around all of them-

I know I keep repeating it over and over how “I don’t know if” so I’ll shut up. I like to think that the interns stay in the motherlobe and have dorms/living arrangements. That way they’re involved and around 24/7. Plus it’s probably handy for those who don’t live nearby (since I’m pretty sure Adam is from the UK…?) But hey living at the motherlobe just means they have more time to hang out.

After doing assignments and homework given by their mentors, they either hang out by their dorm or around the motherlobe. What do they get up to? Shenanigans of course. Whether it’s hanging at the abandoned Lumberstack Diner for snacks, lurking in the forest at night to scare trespassers, pranking or spying senior agents, sharing gossip, the list goes on. Sure, they might be scolded for it and be assigned tedious tasks as punishment, but that doesn’t stop them. Instead it just encourages them to keep doing it and place bets on which teen will get busted. (Like, “Hey Gisu if you can write this on the wall and not get caught I’ll give you five bucks” kind of stuff).

The main prankster masterminds are Gisu, Lizzie, and Morris. They are the “be gay do crime” trio. Adam and Norma are more tactical when it comes to schemes so it can’t be traced back to them (when you have two psychonaut leaders as your mentors you can’t afford to get caught), so they don’t always get involved. Sam’s just in it for the ride and is always down to do the weird ones.

But yeah since Adam and Norma don’t want to get caught so easily, the other teens don’t worry too much. Morris knows that Milla would be stern but forgive him. Compton’s too busy with his own anxiety and isolation to even notice if Lizzie’s getting into trouble. And well, Oleander and Otto would probably encourage it. One would lecture on how not to get caught next time while the other would give tactical advice for the next one and offer to cover for them and make a fake alibi. I’ll let you decide who’s who.

And of course after the events of PN2, Razputin gets dragged into this. Now at first, some of the teens really don’t want to have Raz hang out with them. Mainly because they don’t want to be “babysitting a ten year old”, with some like Lizzie and Morris fearing that he’d rat them out. But as time goes on, he ends up becoming an honorary teen of the group. They sort of become a bad influence, what with getting him involved in pranks and teaching him things he shouldn’t know like swears or how to steal. But Raz is still a good kid.

I got more, but I might save them for the future. I have ideas on what Raz would do when he spends time with the junior agents. However, these might end up being future writing prompts…? We’ll see. If you wanna throw in your two cents or hear more about the other characters feel free to ask. Granted, even if I don’t get much, that probably won’t stop me from doing more posts like this down the line cause I can talk about these funky characters for hours.

[remisummerglow]

Down and Out and Smaller (Prologue)

Amy walked out of her car with trepidation, reminiscing about the events that led her to enter a sciencefictionesque laboratory with her six-inches roommate firmly tucked in her bra. Just a few days prior, this would have been unthinkable; but when Jake couldn't pay his rent after losing his job, she handed him this flier she had found at her campus. He was shrunk in an experiment in exchange for money. And then somehow–white wine and her friend Katya were definitely involved - they had started sleeping together.

"Amy? Come inside, sweetheart, it’s great to see you!" Dr. Diana Hills, the mastermind behind Sizelab, greeted her as if she were an old friend.

"Um, hello doctor," Amy smiled awkwardly.

"So how did it go? From the look on your face, I can already tell things have been great."

"Yeah, pretty much," Amy said, the uneasy feeling of having forgotten something lingering in her mind.

"And how is our subject, our friend Jake, if I may ask?"

Amy gasped and suddenly, her face turned red. She had forgotten to take Jake out of her bra before getting to the lab. "I..." she stuttered, "I think I forgot him in my car."

"Strange," said Dr. Hills, "I thought I could smell a tiny man nearby, possibly very near," she went on as she sniffed toward Amy's chest.

"I'll just go out and get him!" Amy blurted as she ran away from the lab as quickly as her high-heeled shoes allowed her.

Once she thought she was safe from indiscreet looks, she unbuttoned her shirt and fished the little man out from the middle of her cleavage.

Jake let out a sigh as he breathed some fresh air - it was a fairly warm May morning, but it felt chilly compared to the atmosphere inside the giant woman's clothes.

"Amy, is that you?" asked a familiar voice. The girl turned around to see Linda, a curvy blonde she had already met at the lab in their previous shrinking appointment.

"I see that you and your roommate are getting much closer," Linda laughed.

"I just... I just put him there for safety purposes!" Amy stuttered.

Linda chuckled - "Yeah, yeah, I love to keep my boyfriend safe too," she winked.

"Right," Amy said as she ran past Linda, "we're already late, so I'll see you in the waiting room."

"There he is," the doctor said as Amy returned to the laboratory, this time carrying Jake in her hand. Diana grabbed the tiny man that the young brunette handed her and sniffed him. "He seems to be in great health, but I don't know why he smells so much like Yves Saint-Laurent."

"Well," Amy said, eager to switch the subject. "I suppose he will shrink to one inch today?"

"Considering his normal height... 1.06 inches to be exact," the doctor calculated. "As usual, I will ask you to leave the laboratory during the procedure."

"Right," Amy said, and she left the room. She found Linda patiently sitting in the waiting room, browsing a magazine.

The blonde woman smiled at her. “Second time, huh?”

“Yup,” Amy nodded. “And you?”

"As for us, today's the day," Linda said, looking down at her chest and poking her necklace. "Mark's finally growing back."

“Oh, great,” Amy said. “He must be thrilled about that.”

“He probably is, I couldn’t tell. See?” The woman said as she pointed at the cube at the end of the necklace. “That’s him in there.”

Amy focused her gaze on the little transparent cube attached to Linda’s necklace and resting on top of her tits. “Wow!” she gasped as she finally saw the ant-sized man trapped inside. “He’s that small now?”

Linda nodded. “That’s stage three for you, honey. They gave us this necklace to keep him, so he doesn’t get lost.” The blonde woman toyed with the cube until she hid it in the middle of her cleavage, letting it, along with her boyfriend, disappear. “It’s kinda boring when he’s this small,” she said with a disappointed look on her face. “It’s no fun when I can barely feel him on me.”

“I can imagine,” Amy nodded.

“When he was one inch tall though…” she said with a dreamy expression. “I almost wish I could keep him that size,” Linda sighed. “Those days were so fun. Do you think I could borrow Jake?” she laughed. “Just kidding, just kidding. I assume you two are a thing, now,” she added as she saw Amy’s shocked face.

“I’m not sure about that…” Amy said. “Things are moving quickly, you know...”

“Well I won’t insist,” she said. “But in my opinion, you did the right thing. You won’t get many chances to try that kind of experience!”

“I guess you could say that,” Amy laughed.

The doctor came in. “Amy,” she called. “Jake’s ready and waiting for you.”

The young brunette waltzed inside the lab, anxious to see Jake at his new reduced size. She immediately looked at the desk where she remembered finding him the first time he shrank. "Where is he?" she asked once she could not see him in there.

"Why don't you look harder, sweetheart?"

And the doctor's fingertip pointed over the desk until it was in front of a miniaturized human figure.

"Jake!" gasped Amy, who was not prepared to see her roommate bug-sized. "I knew he was going to be this small and still…"

The doctor seemed proud. "The power of research!" she boasted.

Amy hesitated, feeling like the minuscule Jake could break between her fingers if she tried picking him up.

"Ah, don't worry," the doctor said as she grabbed the tiny man from the table and brought him to her face. "They're sturdier than they look at this size."

Jake shrieked as he was lifted in the air at a faster speed than he was expecting or had ever experienced. "Was that him?" asked Amy, as she thought he heard his voice, though it came out very softly to the giant women.

"Huh? Didn't hear anything,” the doctor said, feigning ignorance, and she handed the little man to Amy.

The girl pinched Jake between her thumb and index, trying to be as soft and gentle as possible. Most of his body could fit on her long fingernails, whose white color heavily contrasted his dark grey shrink-suit. Only his head came out of her grip.

"Poor Jake," she cooed, an expression of pity in her eyes. "I will take care of you, little guy."

The doctor was smiling at the heartwarming scene. "Seeing you two like this reminds me of all the fun I had with my husband. I think tonight he's going to be my little toy," she chuckled.

Her toy? Amy looked at Jake and bit her lip. She had already been fantasizing about the things she wanted to do to him, but now that he saw him in her hand so helpless... she realized he was really going to be nothing more than her plaything for the next couple of days.

"Well," Amy said, trying to snap out of her perverted thoughts, "I guess that we should be going, now."

“Yes,” nodded Diana. "Thank you very much for today, and as always, find my assistant on your way back to receive your compensation."

"Wait!" Jake shouted, trying to be heard. "Aren't you going to ask her if I can have alcohol?"

*

Before leaving, Amy headed for the bathroom. She giggled as she saw Jake appearing in the middle of her opening fist. He was so small she could easily forget she was carrying him. Luckily for him, she hadn't forgotten, and she actually had been busy thinking of her plans for him.

Then she unbuttoned her pants, ready to show Jake his seat for the drive home.

"I know you were expecting to ride higher up," she explained, “but I don’t think I can wait to play with you any longer.” She giggled as she tossed him inside her panties, so little space was needed for him that she only had to use the tip of her fingernail to lift the hem of the lace underwear; and down in the darkness of the black fabric he went.

She started massaging her crotch through the fabric, pushing Jake against her soft pussylips, letting him become tangled with the sticky flesh. That’s how she decided to break in her toy. Her labia welcomed Jake, swallowing him like a carnivorous plant spotting a nearby insect. Once he was starting to dive inside, Amy kept pleasuring her demanding flesh, rubbing her crotch with increasing intensity. Jake found himself completely helpless, having become a small part of the woman’s self-gratification mechanism, and forced against the lubricated walls of her pussy, intoxicated with the smell of her sex, gasping for air and yet crazed with the stimulation his whole body was receiving.

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