#murphy will you please marry me?
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one more night
synopsis: the relationship was too toxic but you just cannot break up with him because..
pairing: thomas shelby x reader
warnings: SMUT +18, dubcon, p in v, oral sex (f!receiving), breeding kink, squirting, creampie toxic relationship, mentions of arguments & cheating
notes: based by maroon 5's song: "one more night", divider by cafekitsune
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Your relationship with Thomas Shelby is indeed toxic. He often arrives home late. Even if you were only seated next to him, you flirted with women in the pub. Not even during the day was he there spending time with you. The both of you cannot end a day without an argument. "War" is the fitting word to describe your relationship.
You were starting to decide whether to end the relationship, but the question is, how?
The man gave you a big house for your family, food to eat, money, expensive clothing and jewelry, everything but affection.
The only affection you both had was sex.
Sex with Tommy was the best experience that you had. He has more experience than you, but that doesn't matter since he knows how to satisfy you.
Your thoughts were interrupted by the door opening. He was home— needy, like always.
"Got a fucking long day. I need you," he whispered, locking the door immediately and grabbing your waist to kiss you.
You can never—ever— say no to having sex with this man. He was fucking brilliant.
You kissed him back, tasting the whiskey on his tongue as your tongues danced with each other. Tommy began to undress his suit, unbuttoning it one by one in a hurry, not even breaking the kiss.
He carried you and placed you on the sofa in front of your shared bed. Your hands lifted your shirt, exposing your hardened breast.
No, you've got to stop this. All he does to you is sex and nothing more. You're not his wife anymore; you're his sex toy.
"No— Tom, stop," you whined, feeling his hot breath on your neck as he marked it.
"Why? You don't want this?" Tommy asked, continuing to kiss your neck.
"Yes— no! I want to break up."
His lips are no longer on your neck. His eyes finally met yours.
"Break up?"
"All we do is sex and nothing more— I mean, we're married. We have things to do aside from sex."
"You're funny," that's all Tommy said before kissing you once again. You try to break the kiss, but your body tells you to want more. His rough palms cupped your breast and sucked it like a madman, making you moan out loud.
Tommy's fingers traced your stomach until your soaking wet cunt. You gasped at his touch as you felt his finger massage your clothed clit.
"No— stop, Tom. We can't do this any— oh God!"
"Your body tells you otherwise, sweetheart," Tommy chuckled. He removed your white underwear and tossed it on the floor. Feeling the cold breeze touch your exposed cunt, you arched your back.
"You're telling me to stop but your tight cunt keeps on clenching on my finger."
Tommy continued to pump his finger in and out of your drenched hole while eating you out. His tongue swayed figure eights on your sensitive bud, enjoying your taste. Tommy added another finger, fingering you aggressively, hitting that spongy spot again and again and again.
The wet noise made you feel embarrassed— guilty. Your eyes fully shut, grabbing a fistful of his curly hair to pull him even more closer to your cunt. Your head rolled back in pleasure,
Feeling that familiar knot on your stomach, you moaned like a whore, clenching on his mouth. "I'm so close, Tom."
"Don't stop, please— mmf!"
"Go on. Be a good girl and cum on my face, sweetheart. You're doing so well." he praised and continued to devour you.
Finally coiling up that feeling, you arched your back and moaned. You squirted, a mix of your juice and your white cum staining his mouth and face.
Out of all the men who had sex with, Thomas Shelby is the only man who made you fucking squirt.
"Fuck, baby— you always taste so good," Tommy said before standing up, ready to leave.
"Wait!"
His head turned, a smirk planted on his face.
"What is it?"
"I want.. more," you embarrassingly admitted. You bit your bottom lip, showing him your drenched hole. "Please, Tom."
"I thought you want to end this," he asked sarcastically.
"Just.. one more night," you begged.
Tommy walked towards you again, removing his boxers, freeing out his hardened cock. You bit again your lips at the sight. He really is big.
He pumped his shaft for awhile before positioning himself in front of your hole and take you whole. The feeling of his fat cock enter your tight whole made you wince. Tommy's arms embraced your shoulder as he started to move inside you. You rolled your head as soon as the pain started to become pleasuring.
"We've fucked a lot of times but you're still so tight."
Tommy's pace fastened. Your breasts swayed up and down at every harsh thrusts he makes. Your moans and groans filled the entire room. You felt his balls slap below your whole, letting out skin slapping noises which makes you even more turned on.
"Tom— oh God— yes, yes yes!" you moaned, interlocking your legs together on his lips, allowing himself to sink and pound it further.
Make it stop, you thought.
But it your body says to continue.
Tommy's tip hit the sensitive spots all over and over again, allowing you to moan even more loudly and clenched all over his fat cock.
"I thought you don't want this anymore, huh?" he teasingly asked, listening to the pornographic moans that you're letting out.
"We shouldn't be doing this anym— aah!" you tried to speak but the pleasure won't allow you to even complete your sentence.
Tommy knew you were close with the way your pussy was clenching on his dick too much. His middle finger found its way to your clit, rubbing it aggressively as he wants you to cum.
"Tom, stop— I'm gonna—shit— cum.. oh God, oh God!"
Tommy's erratic thrusts finally made you cum. His shaft still pumping inside your walls covered with your cum, allowing himself to finish.
"No matter how—Christ—rough I go, you're still tight, woman," he groaned as continued his pace while his head was resting on your shoulder. Your nails scratched his back as you felt overstimulated, cumming again.
After a few more pound, Tommy came, pouring all of him inside you, not wasting a single cum. He pulled out slowly, your shared juices slipping out of your drenched hole. There, the guilt panged you. Your mind said stop but your body said yes.
"Give me one more night, just like you said."
——
The morning the next day hits you the hardest. The first thing you saw beside you was no one. Tommy's side of the bed was cold and empty now. He left again.
"One more night, (y/n)," you muttered to yourself.
And now the cycle continues.
#peaky blinders#peaky blinder fanfic#peaky blinders x reader#tommy shelby#thomas shelby#thomas shelby x reader#thomas shelby smut#thomas shelby imagine#cillian murphy#cillian murphy x reader#cillian murphy smut#x reader#peaky blinders smut
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authors note: hope you enjoy! thank you so much for the notes on my last post ily 💗!
duexmoi
liked by username88, user00 and 6,723 others!
duexmoi Nicholas Alexander Chavez and Y/n Y/l/n spotted out in NYC this afternoon! Could this be a budding romance?? 👀
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username88 BEEN WAITING FOR YHIS ONE
user92 im in love with them both
user03 i want someone to look at me the way nicholas looks at y/n
user12 ew why her
user65 girl he doesn’t want you
user67 @user12 face reveal??
user00 i can’t tell if i want to be her or him 😔
user73 y/n leave him for me PLEASE
username33 god FINALLY
user01 please leave them alone! they deserve their privacy!
liked by yourusername
user01 omfg no way she liked
username41 ok but her outfit devours
user23 she never misses
bestfriendsuser
liked by yourusername, nicholasalexanderchaves and 1,749 others!
bestfriendsuser happy bday to my fabulous soul sista !! it’s your party and you can cry if you want to (but don’t) 💗💗
tagged: yourusername
user24 UM nicholas liked???
user09 they were literally seen together the other day
yourusername ILYYY!! on my way to kiss you rn 😘
nicholasalexanderchaves ..oh 😔
yourusername you get one too
username57 GUYS
user71 they forgot they were on their mains and not their spams
nicholasalexanderchavez
liked by yourusername, momsusername and 588,236 others!
nicholasalexanderchaves here to many more bdays spent by your side! i love you 🤍
tagged: yourusername
user99 STOP HER MOM LIKED 😭
yourusername love you to the moon and back 🌕💕
liked by nicholasalexanderchaves
username22 the new it couple
user56 mom and dad
user09 they better not break up istg
user11 im alr manifesting them getting married
username11 her face card never declines
user53 stop they’re perfect
username08 people better leave their relationship ALONE
user03 the paparazzi better not get in the way
username08 @user03 ill throw hands in that happens. im not kidding
user99 my wife? he stole…my wife?
username25 the only good thing to ever come out of ryan murphy
username44 im gonna NEED them in more movies together
yourusername posted a story!
#nicholas alexander chavez#instagram au#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas chavez#grotesquerie#father charlie mayhew#smau
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HAUNTED
Summary: You awaken from a two-year coma to find that Detective Lois has been eagerly awaiting your recovery, believing you might have witnessed something crucial to catching a serial killer. What you didn’t expect is to learn that she suspects your doctor of being the murderer—and even more shockingly, it appears that you are married to him. Now, you must uncover your lost memories and find out who Charlie Mayhew truly is to you.
Author's Note: Yes, I'm writing another fanfic featuring Nicholas Alexander Chavez’s character from Grotesquerie. The characters belong to the universe created by Ryan Murphy in the series Grotesquerie (2024). This fanfic will include violence, strong language, and adult content. It will portray the character Charlie Mayhew as a doctor. I hope you enjoy the fanfic, but there's nothing certain about its future.
PREVIEW
© credits for the owners of the pictures used. they don't belong to me. credit is not mine for the pictures.
ONE
The tension in your hospital room is palpable, Detective Lois and Dr. Mayhew locking eyes as if each were ready to strike. You’re bewildered, unsure of whom or what to believe. But one thing is clear: Dr. Mayhew is your husband. He appears to be the quickest path to recovering your memory—even though Lois seems convinced he’s the reason you’re in this condition.
“Detective Tryon, as eager as you are to drag a statement out of my wife, she’ll be of no use to your scheme of blaming me for your incompetence,” Dr. Mayhew says, running a hand through his hair with a clear hint of tension. “She remembers nothing, and your persistence will only confuse her further.” He sighs heavily, while Lois watches him with a mocking smile, as if her patience has completely worn thin.
“Your performance is so convincing. You must have taken acting lessons at some point in your life,” she says, stepping toward him with a threatening air. “I can’t allow you to harm this woman before she has the chance to tell the world who you really are.”
“Enough!” you exclaim, frustrated by their bickering. Both turn to you, their expressions shifting to something like concern. “Detective Tryon, I appreciate your efforts to keep me safe. But if this man truly is my husband, that must mean something,” you say, almost on instinct. Perhaps you’re being foolish, even hasty. But there has to be something to this. Taking a risk is all you have left—now that you don’t even belong to yourself.
"Are you really willing to risk your life to be near this man, Y/N?" Detective Tryon holds your arm, her grip nearly desperate, as though trying to pull you away from Dr. Mayhew. The force of it makes you uncomfortable, and you wince, letting out a low sound of pain.
“Release my wife, Detective,” Dr. Mayhew snaps, his tone finally sharpened, his calm composure cracking. “I remind you that if we report your misconduct to your superiors, your entire baseless case will fall apart.” He steps between you and Lois, his hands slipping into his lab coat pockets, the stance a clear challenge.
"What would truly please you, right?" Lois challenges, staring straight into Dr. Mayhew's eyes. You watch them silently, still feeling the ache in your arm where Lois had grabbed you.
"Would you like to know what would actually please me?" Dr. Mayhew whispers, moving closer to Lois. "I’d be pleased to have my wife with me again, without the interference of a lunatic so obsessed with her own failures that she needs to ruin my life just to sleep at night. Careful, Lois. You’re becoming obsessed with me." You're uncertain of his intentions, but the authoritative tone in his voice and the way he carries himself is undeniably alluring.
Lois narrows her eyes, her expression darkening as Dr. Mayhew moves closer, his tone laced with mockery and barely concealed venom. “Is that so, Dr. Mayhew? Obsession, you call it?” she scoffs, a bitter smile playing on her lips. “Let’s not confuse dedication to justice with obsession. But perhaps you’re simply too accustomed to manipulating the truth to recognize it when you see it.”
You watch the exchange, torn between skepticism and an undeniable draw toward him. Despite the sharp edge in his words, the way Dr. Mayhew stands his ground, unyielding and unafraid, stirs something within you. Even as his gaze shifts to meet yours, there’s an intensity there that unsettles yet captivates you—a magnetic pull that defies reason.
“Why not focus on your own affairs, Detective,” he murmurs, his eyes still on you, a slight smirk playing at the corner of his mouth, “and let my wife and I… reconnect. Unless, of course, you’ve truly no other purpose in your life than meddling in mine.”
Your confidence is remarkable, Charlie," Lois remarks. "Mrs. Mayhew, if you need me for any reason, here’s my number. I’ll also be visiting again soon to see if there’s been any progress in your memory recovery." She hands you a card with her contact information, then smirks mockingly at Dr. Mayhew. "And don’t worry, Charlie, I’ll let Megan know you’ll be unavailable." With that, she finally exits your hospital room.
Charlie stares at you, irritation burning in his gaze. "Do you believe her?" Dr. Mayhew demands, advancing toward you with sudden intensity. You feel as if the air is being drawn from your lungs with his nearness, his gaze piercing. "Honestly, I don’t know whom to believe," you murmur, leaning back against the hospital bed behind you, your eyes locked onto his.
"Fine!" he exclaims, voice laced with indignation. He turns to leave, but then hesitates, his hand lingering on the door frame as if torn between staying and leaving. After a tense pause, he steps back inside, his tone shifting from anger to something raw and vulnerable.
"Y/N… if you can’t trust me, then at least remember what we once were. Remember the promises we made." His voice drops to a murmur, almost pleading. "I’m not the monster she’s painting me to be." The intensity in his words sends a shiver down your spine, leaving you more conflicted than ever as he finally, reluctantly, exits the room. What makes it all worse is that neither of them is truly thinking about you. Neither one noticed that you’ve only just discovered your own name, that you're lost and confused. They don’t see that you don’t want to be manipulated—you want to be understood.
“You are like him…” you murmur, recognizing that you’re no longer in your hospital room. Everything around you is intensely white—the walls, the bed you're seated on, every corner spotless and untouched. A cross hangs on the wall behind the priest, casting a shadow that flickers slightly, as if from candlelight. The room feels steeped in something sacred, almost otherworldly, like a faint echo of a memory stirring within you. The priest looks at you with a serene expression, though there’s an unmistakable weight behind his gaze. As he steps closer, the almost sacred atmosphere around you amplifies the tension. You try to process the overwhelming resemblance to Dr. Mayhew—even the contours of his face are identical, but the priest’s shorter, more traditional hairstyle highlights the difference. Your mind wavers between doubt and recognition, as if your subconscious is trying to unveil something long forgotten.
“You keep searching for answers outside yourself, yet everything you need lies within,” he murmurs, his deep voice echoing through the room like a quiet revelation.
“Father, I don’t know. I don’t know what to do, what to feel,” you whisper, your voice breaking as you meet his gaze. Tears slip down your cheeks, and a quiet, aching desperation fills the space between you. The priest, unmoved yet tender, holds your gaze.
“Faith moves mountains, and as long as it resides within you, you will be safe,” he murmurs, his voice a gentle command that resonates deeply. “Find your faith, and you will know what—and whom—to believe.”
Despite the haziness, a strange comfort wraps around your heart, soft yet unexplainable. His words, laced with a familiar warmth, guide you into a calm acceptance, though the reason remains unknown. Then, leaning closer, he whispers in your ear, “Now, kneel and seek forgiveness.” Almost instinctively, you find yourself on your knees before him, grasping the folds of his robe at his knees, your head bowed as though in reverence.
“Father, forgive me,” you whisper, your head bowed. His fingers lift your chin gently, compelling you to meet his gaze. “How can I grant you absolution, when your hands are stained with blood, my sweet sinner?” he murmurs, lowering his face near yours, his breath warm against your ear, sending a chill down your spine.
You’re shocked, frozen beneath his intense gaze, but unable to break away. As you glance down, horror floods your senses—you see your hands smeared with blood. Stumbling backward, you gasp, eyes wide in disbelief. The priest rises from the bed, stepping slowly toward you with an unwavering gaze, a faint trail of blood marking his face. You’re overwhelmed with fear, a scream building in your throat until it finally erupts, piercing the silence. And then—just like that—you awaken from your haunting dream, heart racing, as the unsettling remnants of the nightmare fade into the dim light of your hospital room.
Dr. Mayhew, startled awake in the chair beside your bed, immediately reaches for you. “Hey, Y/N, are you alright?” he asks, his voice filled with concern as he stands and wraps you in a firm embrace. His arms encircle you with a warmth that feels protective, grounding you in the present moment, as if he’s trying to shield you from whatever haunted you.
“I… I had a nightmare,” you whisper once you catch your breath, the tension beginning to ease as you lean into his hold. And everything feels like déjà vu. Just like before, you wake from a nightmare involving the priest, and once again, Dr. Mayhew is by your side. You can't help but wonder if there’s a connection between his presence and the terrifying, bloody dreams that haunt you each night.
“Don’t worry, darling,” Dr. Mayhew murmurs softly, his hand tracing gentle circles on your back, his touch soothing. The warmth of his embrace gives you an unexpected feeling of lightness, as though he’s holding you together amidst the lingering fragments of your nightmare.
“Can we leave this place?” you ask, your voice trembling as you try to stifle the tears that have flowed since you woke. He holds you a little closer, and you feel a subtle tension in his grip, as if considering your question carefully.
“We will, soon,” he assures, his tone steady, though a flicker of something unreadable passes over his face. “For now, rest. I’ll be here.”
"Stay here; I need you to answer me—while looking into my eyes," you insist, tugging at Dr. Mayhew's clothes, almost dislodging his tie. Though he’d intended to return to the hospital chair, he remains by your side, his gaze steady yet guarded.
“Will you even believe my answer?” he asks softly, his voice carrying a hint of doubt, as though unsure anything he says would hold weight with you. His eyes search yours, wary yet attentive, as if weighing what he’s willing to reveal.
"You'll have to take the risk and believe that I will," you say softly, though you're unsure if you can truly trust anything he says. Dr. Mayhew's hand reaches gently to touch your face, but you instinctively pull back, murmuring, "I’m sorry."
“Ask me whatever you wish, Y/N,” he says, his voice tinged with impatience, perhaps confused by your conflicting actions—clinging to him, pulling him closer, yet retreating from his touch. You, too, are struggling to understand what you’re feeling, torn between wanting him near and pushing him away.
“Do you love me?” you ask, your gaze unwavering, trying to find answers in the depths of his eyes. His stare holds yours, as if the question should be irrelevant, as if he has already shown you everything you need to know. His expression softens, but the weight of his response carries something more.
"I’m your husband, Y/N," he replies, his voice steady, but there's an intensity in his eyes, a depth of meaning that you can’t ignore. "Doesn't that answer everything?" His words hang in the air, thick with unspoken emotion, and for a moment, you wonder if the truth lies somewhere in the space between his claims and the confusion that churns in your heart.
"Answer me, Dr. Mayhew, do you love me?" you ask, using a more assertive tone, making it clear that you are not satisfied with his previous answer. He smiles, as if he can't believe it. "I love you, Mrs. Mayhew. I would die for you if necessary," he responds confidently. His eyes are fixed on you, as if waiting for something.
"Then even if the truth disappoints me. Even if you think it's going to hurt me, I need you to be honest. About these murders, about Megan, about everything." You speak firmly, staring into his eyes.
Dr. Mayhew's expression hardens as you mention the two things he surely wishes you would forget. For a moment, he looks at the hospital room wall without saying anything. "Honesty is a double-edged sword. As you inflict it on someone, someone can inflict it on you," his gaze darkens, his demeanor heavy, almost demonic. "If honesty is what you want; honesty is all you'll get."
He stands up, lifting his face to yours, now standing directly in front of you. "You think the truth will set you free, but sometimes it only binds you to something far worse," Dr. Mayhew says, so close to your face it feels as though he's about to kiss you. His words are heavy, yet his gaze is devilishly captivating. For a moment, you sense that he's savoring the expression of fear in your eyes. "Then let the truth bind us both, if that's what we deserve," you reply, challenging him, even though a part of you trembles with fear.
He straightens his coat, his hand running through his hair with a sharp, almost angry gesture, as though attempting to pull himself together. "Rest, Y/N. The truth will find its way to you, sooner or later. But I can promise you this: I am, and will always be, honest with the woman I love—even if she doubts me." With those words, Dr. Mayhew places a soft, lingering kiss on your forehead, a gesture of tenderness. Then, without another word, he exits your hospital room, leaving you in a heavy silence.
#doctor charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew x y/n#charlie mayhew x reader#female reader#angst#suspense thriller#suspense romance#lois tryon#megan duval#grotesquerie fx#grotesquerie fanfic#charlie mayhew fanfic#charlie mayhew#nicholas alexander chavez#doctor charlie mayhew x reader#doctor charlie mayhew x y/n#charlie mayhew x female reader#Spotify#charlie mayhew smut#nicholas alexander chevez#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas chavez x y/n
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ᴛʀɪᴘʟᴇ ᴛʀᴏᴜʙʟᴇ
Bruce Wayne x Reader x Jonathan Crane (NSFW)
When you notice Dr. Jonathan Crane watching you and your husband at a fundraising party, you get a little curious. When Dr. Crane angers you, he presses you to explore that anger. Will he regret it?
warnings: smut, nipple play, fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (both vaginal and anal), oral sex, cock warming, anal sex, anal fingering, blowjobs, dirty talk, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, hair pulling, porn without much plot, masturbation, forced masturbation, threesome, male x male, male x female, male x male x female, cum swallowing, spitting, face sitting, face fucking, crying, sub/dom tones, dom!reader, sub!jonathan, kinda sub!bruce but not really, ya know, just pure filth
word count: 5254
author’s note: welcome to our one-way ticket to hell besties <3 I didn't proofread this because it just poured out of me and I was truly possessed by the writing demon today. I had an idea and literally ran with it. I don't think I've ever written something so filthy before lol please enjoy and give feedback!! READ THE WARNINGS this fic isn't for everyone tbh.
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MOODBOARD FOR THIS FIC
ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏᴘʏ, ʀᴇᴘʀᴏᴅᴜᴄᴇ, ᴏʀ ᴄʟᴀɪᴍ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜʀs ᴏɴ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ, ᴀᴏ3, ᴡᴀᴛᴛᴘᴀᴅ, ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴇʙsɪᴛᴇ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪssɪᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴜsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ɪɴ ᴀɪ ɢᴇɴᴇʀᴀᴛᴏʀs ᴏʀ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀʀᴛɪғɪᴄɪᴀʟ ɪɴᴛᴇʟʟɪɢᴇɴᴄᴇ. ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴀʏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴜsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋs ᴛᴏ sᴇʟʟ ғᴏʀ ᴀs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴡɴ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛɪᴏɴ
One thing about being married to the Bruce Wayne was he had a thing for throwing parties and fundraisers at your mansion. This meant you had to dress up quite a bit, and you had to look really good as you were Bruce’s wife, of course. He always ensured you had the newest and most gorgeous gowns to show off at the gatherings. You’d spend the whole day getting your hair, makeup, and nails done, only to be at the parties for a few hours. And that was usually because Bruce had other duties in the city, he got too distracted by what you were wearing and needed you right then, or he simply let his antisocial side creep up on him. Tonight at the fundraiser he’s throwing, he seems content and has been by your side most of the night. Nothing drastic was going on in the city that demanded his action. But something was bothering him, you could tell. He’s slightly off, and you catch him staring at someone in the crowd a few times. You’re never able to pick them out, though.
You and Bruce are by the champagne table, and you notice Bruce is gazing out into the crowd of partygoers again.
“Bruce?” you ask softly, putting a hand on his bicep, “You alright?”
Bruce blinks hard a few times before turning to you, “I’m fine, darling.”
“You sure? You seem distracted by something this evening,” you scan the room, but to no avail for whomever Bruce is focused on.
“I just thought I recognized someone,” Bruce says, sipping his drink.
“Hmm. Alright, then.”
“Have I told you that you look beautiful tonight?” Bruce smiles, letting a hand slide across the small of your back.
“Only about a thousand times,” you giggle, leaning into your husband.
You happen to look up, and that’s when you see him staring at the two of you. Dr. Jonathan Crane. He quickly averts his eyes away, but you have already caught him.
“Is it Dr. Crane that you recognize?” you ask Bruce, motioning to where he’s standing with some other rich psychologists.
“Yeah,” Bruce exhales, shrugging, “I thought he had left the city a while ago.”
“After the asylum got turned loose? I figured so, too. Oh well,” you say, looking up at Bruce, “If he’s here, then he’s donating, so maybe it’s not so bad.”
“You have a point,” Bruce raises his eyebrows, “I’m still keeping an eye on him, though.”
You knew of a few of the villains Bruce has come in contact with, including Jonathan. He had almost killed your best friend and sent the whole city insane. Who knows what would have happened to Gotham if it weren't for Bruce. But a part of you is curious about Jonathan- a deep, intellectual part of you. Why is he still here? Is he still a doctor? Your brain becomes dizzy with all the questions. If Jonathan is here acting casually on his own accord, you could, too. You tear away from Bruce without a word, drink in hand. Bruce calls after you, panic surging through him when he realizes where you’re headed.
“Dr. Crane,” you smile upon arriving in front of him and another psychologist, “Wonderful to see you here.”
“Ah, Mrs. Wayne. I wouldn’t miss a marvelous party for a good cause. Have you met Dr. Robin here?” Jonathan smiles back, not missing a single beat.
“I have not,” you look over to the tall woman in front of Jonathan, clad in a pantsuit. You reach out a hand for her to shake, “Y/N Wayne.”
“I know who you are, Mrs. Wayne,” Dr. Robin says politely, her Australian accent strong, “Your dress is quite lovely, I must say.”
“Thank you,” you reply with a smile, willing her to leave so you could speak with Jonathan alone.
“Well, I’ll be off. Seems you two have something to discuss,” Dr. Robin announces her departure, much to your relief.
“It was nice meeting you,” you say sweetly as she walks away.
“You as well, Mrs. Wayne.”
You turn to Jonathan, who clears his throat as he looks you up and down. You’re nearly the same height as him, if not slightly taller, in your heels.
“It’s really brave of you to be here, Dr. Crane,” you turn your head to the side, giving him a closed-lip smile.
“Please, call me Jonathan,” Jonathan responds, “And what would you mean by that?”
You take a step closer to him, leaning into his ear, “You know exactly what I’m talking about, Jonathan. Or should I say, Mr. Scarecrow.”
Jonathan doesn’t flinch. In fact, he grins at you as he exhales a laugh, “Those days are behind me, I’m afraid.”
“Uh-huh,” you cross your arms, “And why should I believe you?”
Jonathan glances behind you to look at Bruce, who is on edge and watching the entire conversation to ensure nothing is tried. A muscle in Jonathan’s jaw twitches, “You don’t have to. But if I were up to no good, why would I be in the presence of the Batman and his lover? Quite unintelligent, wouldn’t you think?”
“And why are you here, exactly?”
“Trying to get myself back into the Gotham scene,” Jonathan looks at you matter-of-factly, “I’ve missed a lot being gone, you know.”
“Oh, I do know. And maybe you should’ve stayed gone,” you try not to snarl at him.
“Now, now, Mrs. Wayne. That is no way to speak to a donor,” Jonathan says, his voice dripping like honey with malice.
“You better be glad there are people around or-”
“Or what?” Jonathan asks, raising his eyebrows, a smirk itching at his lips.
“I’d fucking break you right here.”
“Sounds like a fun time. However, I’m not sure your husband would appreciate that in many, many ways.”
You scoff, “Don’t be crass. I’m not flirting with you. If I were, you’d know it.”
“There’s a fine line between desire and hatred, my dear,” Jonathan whispers in your ear, causing goosebumps to arise on your skin, “It’s a fun line to walk.”
Annoyance swells in your chest. You desperately wanted him to shut his bratty mouth. You also wanted to enjoy the rest of the party, but now that Jonathan had you riled up in anger, you wanted nothing more than to slam him against the wall and-
“Everything okay over here?” Bruce approaches suddenly, taking you by surprise.
“Everything is fine, sweetheart,” you place your hand on Bruce’s chest as a warning, “Nothing to worry about.”
“Dr. Crane isn’t bothering you, is he?” Bruce’s nostrils flare.
“Not at all,” you defend the doctor, “In fact, I’m probably annoying him.”
Bruce laughs humorlessly, “Oh, is that so?”
You cock your head at him, “Did you need something, dear?”
“Just want to speak with you privately,” Bruce says.
You go to say something, but Bruce interrupts you, “Both of you.”
If Jonathan is just as confused as you are, he doesn’t show it.
“Lead the way, Mr. Wayne.”
Bruce walks briskly to one of the guest rooms down the hall from the ballroom, making sure no one is following or watching the three of you. He ushers you and Jonathan inside, following suit before closing the door behind him.
“You know,” Jonathan says, breaking the silence, “I never pegged Mrs. Wayne for the threatening type out of the two of you.”
You bite your tongue, and Bruce looks over at you.
“Say what you want to say. I brought the two of you in here so you could solve your conversation away from those nosy fuckers outside,” Bruce rolls his eyes, fixing his cuff links.
“We aren’t children, Bruce,” you scowl.
“Then act like it,” Bruce sasses back.
“I do not need two men on my bad side right now. Remember what happens when you’re on my bad side, Bruce?”
Bruce looks between you and Jonathan, a hint of nervousness in his eye, “Don’t bring him into this, darling.”
“No, no. I’m curious now,” Jonathan grins deviously, stepping closer to you, “What happens when someone is on your bad side, Mrs. Wayne?”
Now realizing how your words and threats may have sounded all night to Jonathan, you backpedal.
“Not what you think, Dr. Crane,” you cross your arms, taking a step back from the doctor.
“Oh really? So your antagonizing and threats don’t mean anything?”
“What do you think they mean?”
“As I said earlier, desire and hatred are very close to one another,” Jonathan says suavely, “And I honestly can’t tell which you feel toward me.”
You make a disgusted sound despite the growing need to pin this man down and give him what for. Not even sexually, but simply because you’re tired of him speaking. However, Jonathan wasn’t bad-looking by any means- and sometimes, you and Bruce liked to try new things. But you don’t think Bruce would want to fuck with a murderer and criminal, especially one he’s had close encounters within the city. Jonathan almost burned him alive once, so you aren’t sure about whatever he’s insinuating going very far with your husband.
“Hatred,” you spit, “It’s hatred. Plus,” you look over at Bruce, “I don’t think my lover would appreciate me having anything to do with you anyway.”
Jonathan snorts, his eyes flickering between you and your husband, “Are you so sure about that?”
You furrow your brow, laughing incredulously at him, “I’m certain.”
“I don’t know,” Bruce says suddenly, “I wouldn’t mind seeing the fucker squirm on your account, Y/N.”
You nearly gasped, suddenly very aware of the animosity you were aiming at Dr. Jonathan Crane, now becoming sexual in nature. Not that you meant for it to, but now that it was insinuated out loud by someone other than Jonathan, you pondered your true feelings. As you’ve said, Jonathan was a looker. If you weren’t married to Bruce and the man wasn’t psychotic, you wouldn’t mind taking him for a ride. But you are married, and he is psychotic.
Jonathan has his hands shoved in his pockets, a smirk on his face as he studies you, “You want this. Don’t deny it, Mrs. Wayne. I can tell by the look in your eyes.”
You purse your lips together, “What I want is for you to shut up and behave. All you do is act high and mighty when you’re nothing but a little rat.”
Bruce tries to hide his laugh by covering it with a cough, “I’ll let everyone know it’s time to leave. When I come back, you two better be taking care of things.”
You look at Bruce, who gives you a slight nod in approval to do as you wish before he steps out of the room. No one is in charge in the bedroom permanently between the two of you. The dominant role is shared or is back and forth, depending on the day. To your shock, Bruce gives you the complete reins in this situation. But Bruce knew how much you despised Dr. Crane for what he’s done, even if a part of you is desperately curious about him. Desperate enough to demean him sexually, even. You want to humiliate him. Make him cry and make him regret having even come here. You want him to think of you whenever he feels shame or embarrassment for the rest of his life.
“A little rat, huh?” Jonathan chuckles, undoing his cufflinks.
“Yes,” you blink, forcing him to walk backward to the bed as he struggles to remove his blazer.
You shove him roughly onto the bed, watching him bounce from the mattress with a look of disorientation. Jonathan eventually gets his blazer off, discarding it onto the floor. You can’t properly climb on the bed with your gown on, so you reach behind your back, undoing the clasps that hold the silver dress together. You kick off your glittery heels, letting the gown slip to the floor in a pile. Underneath your dress, you decided a black lingerie set would do nicely. You’re glad you picked well, considering such a doting man was now staring at you like you were a piece of meat and he was starving. You try to ignore the logical side of your brain telling you this man is dangerous and crazy. But the other side of your brain is telling you that his cock is definitely dangerous and crazy, too. And you wanted to find out for sure.
“Now,” you begin to crawl to where Jonathan wordlessly lays, watching you carefully, “Are you going to be good and keep your mouth shut, pretty boy?”
“No promises,” Jonathan flashes a toothy grin, and you angrily rip his button-up open, buttons flying everywhere across the room.
Jonathan’s mouth hangs open, “That was an expensive shirt.”
“Nothing you can’t replace,” you shrug, running your hands along Jonathan’s handsome chest before letting your nails graze his nipples.
Jonathan shudders at the feeling, and you remove your hands from him, sitting back on your heels, “Lay on the pillows.”
“Ma’am, yes ma’am,” Jonathan purrs, doing as told, surprisingly.
You hear the door open behind you, and you turn around quickly to see Bruce.
“Everyone is cleared out. Brought some fun stuff, too,” he places a box on the floor, kicking it to the end of the bed for you to grab it.
You lean down over the edge of the bed and retrieve the box, crawling on your knees to where Jonathan lies. You open the box and hum in satisfaction at Bruce’s choice of toys and trinkets. You fiddle with one toy, dragging your gaze to Jonathan with a wicked smile on your face. But before you reveal the toy, you snatch some rope out of the box.
“Now you have no choice but to be good, Dr. Crane,” you snicker, offering Bruce some of the rope to tie Jonathan’s left wrist to the bedpost with.
You tie Jonathan’s right wrist tight enough for him not to move too much but not enough to where blood flow is cut off. Jonathan tugs at the rope, looking at you and Bruce with a nervous yet exhilarating smile.
“I’m privileged to be living such a fantasy,” Jonathan sighs.
“You’ll be wishing you had never stepped foot in this house when she’s done with you,” Bruce smirks, unbuttoning his shirt cuffs and rolling his sleeves up.
“Ah,” Jonathan laughs.
Before he can comment any further, you shove a ball gag into his mouth, strapping it behind his head securely. A deep feeling of satisfaction to him finally being quiet fills you. But the joy of seeing such an evil man at your mercy is more intense.
“You better be glad I chose the ball gag instead of having Bruce have his way with that pretty mouth of yours, Crane,” you say, and Bruce shakes his head from where he stands beside the bed.
Drool begins seeping out of the sides of Jonathan’s mouth, and you can’t help but coo at the sight of his tightening pants and his reddening cheeks. You grab his face between your fingers, squishing his flesh. You hum in satisfaction before letting go of his face and focusing on his slacks. You all but tear his belt off his hips, hurrying to unbutton his pants before ripping them down his thighs. Bruce removes the pants the rest of the way as you climb onto Jonathan’s lap, your clothed core atop his throbbing, leaking bulge.
You kiss Jonathan’s jaw, leaving harsh bites along the column of his throat as you travel down, continuing your assault on the skin of his chest and torso. You reach the band of his underwear, which you tease with your hands, snapping the band against Jonathan’s skin. He tries his best to laugh from underneath the ball gag, spit sputtering from the gaps of his mouth. You slowly peel his underwear down his legs, watching as his hard cock slaps against his stomach. You let Bruce pull the underwear off completely, and he tosses it somewhere in the room to be found later. You lean down to lick the bead of precum off Jonathan's tip before pulling away completely, allowing Bruce the room to tie up the doctor’s ankles to the bottom bedposts. You stand at the foot of the bed, chuckling darkly as Jonathan struggles against the restraints.
“Not so powerful now, are you, Dr. Crane?” you laugh, knowing he didn’t like you calling him by his professional name, “You look so pathetic, lying there with your poor cock out for us to see. Bet you wish one of us would touch it for you, hmm?”
Jonathan stays silent, his eyes boring into yours as he yanks his arms, testing the rope’s strength. He realizes he truly can’t move or speak and that he’s entirely at you and Bruce’s mercy. Not the worst position to be in, Jonathan thinks.
“Which of us should do the honors?” you ask Bruce, a playful smile on your face.
It isn’t often Bruce gets to mess with the other man during your experimental sexual encounters. Still, you figure this is personal enough for him to want to be involved.
“You can take this one. I’ve got other plans,” Bruce says, smirking deviously.
“Oh really?” you grin, “I’m excited to see those.”
You climb back on the bed, moving toward Jonathan’s lap, where his weeping cock is getting redder by the second. Grabbing the base of it, you move it forward enough for it to meet your lips. You lap your tongue on Jonathan’s tip, smearing the precum around before licking a stripe up his entire length. You pull away, letting his cock slap painfully against his stomach again. You harshly grip Jonathan’s balls, causing him to cry out muffled. You massage them as you take his length into your mouth, bobbing your head as you continue to take him in entirely. You press your breasts into the bed, letting your ass be exposed for Bruce to take advantage of as you suck off Jonathan. Bruce wastes no time walking over to you, letting his hands run over your asscheeks before he pulls your pretty black underwear off. Bruce dips his head down to flatten his tongue against your wet slit, gathering your arousal as he swirls it around your cunt. You moan around Jonathan’s cock, causing him to twitch.
“God, I love this pussy,” Bruce pants against you, “Too bad you can’t get a taste, Crane.”
You peer your eyes up to Jonathan’s, his icy blue eyes now dark from his blown pupils. He’s glaring at Bruce, trying to regulate his breathing as his tip hits the back of your throat. Jonathan’s eyes roll into the back of his head as you fuck him with your mouth, letting his cock slam into your throat. Jonathan tries to thrust into your mouth, but you push his hips down against the mattress. You’re slobbering, and tears are streaming down your face as you take his length as much as you can, wanting him to get as close to cumming as possible. Bruce sucks your clit harshly, letting two fingers slip into your wet pussy. You groan, the vibrations sending Jonathan batty. You feel him getting close, and you blindly fumble around for the box of toys that still remains on the bed somewhere. You find it, pulling off Jonthan’s cock as it twitches uncontrollably. He growls as you find the toy you were looking for. You give Jonathan a few pumps, gripping his length as tight as you can, watching as the precum helplessly spills from him. Before Jonathan can react or cum, you slip a cock ring onto him, sliding it down to his base. He cries out from behind the ball gag, his chest heaving. You lay your head on his thigh, watching as his cock turns bright red. Bruce continues to eat you out, his teeth brushing against your clit occasionally, causing you to moan. Your breath hits Jonathan’s angry length, making him shiver. You look him in the eyes as Bruce adds a third finger, fucking into your g spot harshly as he bites at your bundle of nerves. You maintain eye contact with Jonathan as you cum, letting your nails dig into the soft flesh on his thighs.
“Lucky for me,” you trace Jonathan’s tip teasingly with your finger, catching your breath, “I get to cum as much as I want.”
Jonathan stares at you without making a sound, focusing on his breathing so he doesn’t explode into a fine mist from the overstimulation.
“Now it’s your turn since you’ve been a good boy,” you remove the ball gag from Jonathan’s mouth, licking up his spit from his lips before he can lick it off himself.
“Open your mouth,” you demand, and Jonathan does as told.
You gather his and your saliva in your mouth before spitting it onto his tongue.
“Now show me how good you are at eating pussy, Dr. Crane.”
You flip yourself around, hovering over Jonathan’s face as you slowly remove the cock ring. Bruce removes his button-up, laying down between Jonathan’s spread legs. Jonathan lets out a strangled cry at the feeling of Bruce’s hot mouth on his sensitive cock. You push your pulsing cunt onto Jonathan’s face, to which he happily starts lapping hungrily. You watch as Bruce hollows his cheeks around Jonathan, and the sight alone makes you even wetter than before.
“Fuck,” you mutter, Bruce’s eyes meeting yours.
You rock your hips against Jonathan’s tongue, urging him to continue. Jonathan wishes he could bury his fingers in your cunt, but he settles for his tongue instead. Twisting and pushing it inside you, he uses his nose to press against your clit, shaking his head. You grip Jonathan’s hair, cursing at the feeling of his tongue dragging in your walls and his nose flicking your bundle of nerves. You grasp your barely clothed breasts, letting your thumbs play with your nipples through the thin lace. Bruce moans around Jonathan while watching you, letting Jonathan fuck into his throat.
“Wanna cum, you piece of shit?” Bruce pulls off Jonathan, who gasps a ‘yes,’ “Be careful what you ask for,” Bruce chuckles.
You plan on milking the doctor for all he’s got all night. You want him spent and begging for mercy. Anything to make him miserable.
Bruce takes Jonathan back into his mouth, bobbing up and down quickly and stroking what he won’t take into his mouth. Bruce allows Jonathan to buck his hips into his face. Jonathan lets out a pitiful cry as he cums in your husband’s mouth, white-hot spurts of seed shooting down Bruce’s throat. You feel Jonathan roll your clit between his teeth before sucking it between his lips as he rides his high. You growl, letting your self-control go out the window. You chase your own high, letting Jonathan torture and tease your bundle of nerves with his tongue and teeth until you finally release in his mouth. Jonathan slurps and suckles every drop of your arousal from your cunt, licking until you pull off him.
“Lucky for you,” you pant, beginning to untie the rope bound to Jonathan’s wrists, “This next part requires your cooperation. Promise you’ll behave?”
“Yes, Mrs. Wayne,” Jonathan nods.
You let Bruce finish untying the doctor as you discard your bra. You instruct Jonathan to move to the side, allowing you to lie down in his place. You demand that Jonathan climb on top of you. he does as told, and Bruce roughly pushes Jonthan’s face into your chest. You laugh at Bruce’s typical roughness, especially when it makes Jonathan look flustered. His ass is now in the air, revealed to Bruce.
“Have you ever been fucked in the ass like a good boy?” you ask Jonathan, your fingers in his hair.
He doesn’t look at you or respond.
“I’m asking you a question, Jonathaaan,” you say threateningly, your fingers now gripping his hair harshly as you lift his head for him to look at you.
“No,” Jonathan says breathlessly.
“Well, that’s about to change,” you say, “Any regrets about being smart-mouthed to me yet, Dr. Crane?”
Jonathan glares at you, panting as Bruce spreads his ass apart, “Not yet.”
“Good,” you smile, letting his head drop abc to your chest, “Now obey me and show me how much you’re enjoying this.”
You move Jonathan’s face, maneuvering his mouth to your hardened and sensitive nipple. Bruce takes some lube from the box he brought, smearing it against his fingers before teasing Jonathan’s asshole with the tip of his index finger. Jonathan keens around you, his body beginning to shake as Bruce slowly pushes a finger inside him. Jonathan sucks harshly on your nipple, gasping as your husband wiggles his finger inside his tight ass. He laps at your bud, focusing on trying to please you and taking Bruce’s long finger simultaneously. A second finger is added, stretching Jonathan further. The doctor lets out a sharp groan at the delectable burn. He attacks your other breast, letting his finger circle around the one he was just attached to. Bruce prods a third finger into Jonathan, and he lurches forward from the feeling of fullness.
“If you think you’re full now, just wait for Bruce’s fat cock, baby boy,” you taunt.
Bruce twists and curls his fingers inside Jonathan, doing his best to prep him for his unforgiving length. When he pulls his hand away, Jonathan gasps from the sudden emptiness. Bruce spreads his ass apart again, his slacks and underwear now discarded as his hardened cock pressed against Joanthan’s gaping hole. Jonathan whimpers around your nipple, pausing momentarily as Bruce slides himself into Jonathan.
“Fuck,” Jonathan shudders.
“You can stop now. I need you elsewhere,” you pull Jonathan’s head off your breasts, sneaking your hand between the two of you to his newly hardened cock, stroking it in your hand in time for Bruce to bottom out.
Jonathan whines, collapsing on your torso as the air leaves him.
“Tapped out already?” you pout, sticking your bottom lip out at Jonathan when you lift his head by his hair again, “Too fucking bad.”
Bruce then pulls out of Jonathan almost all the way before slamming back into him, his tip brushing against Jonathan’s prostate. Jonathan screams as you guide his cock between your slick folds, his body overstimulated. You let Jonathan weakly push his length inside your soaking cunt, your walls enveloping him immediately. Bruce wraps an arm around Jonathan’s chest, anchoring himself to the doctor. His other hand grips Jonathan’s hip with intensity. The feeling of Bruce pounding into Jonathan’s tight little ass affects you directly as Jonathan pushes deeper inside you every time Bruce thrusts into him. Soon, a rhythm is established, and you’re nearly in tears from pleasure as you watch Jonathan become a withering, crying mess underneath Bruce.
“Doing so good taking Bruce’s huge cock,” you praise Jonathan, bucking your hips with his every time he involuntarily moves forward, “You could at least try a little harder to fuck me like you want to, though.”
Jonathan’s forehead is teeming with sweat as he struggles to actually thrust into you while Bruce fucks into his prostate. You give him the benefit of the doubt- the first time getting fucked in the ass is intense. So you rock and swivel your hips on Jonathan’s cock roughly, letting him reach up to grab your breasts for leverage. He pinches your nipples, twisting them hard, sending electricity to your cunt. You pulse around Jonathan’s length, causing him to grunt miserably. Bruce’s hips are slapping onto Jonathan’s asscheeks loudly, and Jonathan’s cock twitches pitifully inside you.
“Cum, sweet thing,” you coax Jonathan, whose hair has long since lost its gel hold and has begun flopping into his face, “Cum inside me.”
Jonathan starts fucking into you the best he can, tears streaming down his face as he cums, a hoarse scream leaving his throat. Bruce is still fucking him without mercy, and you let Jonathan’s soft cock remain inside you as he whimpers helplessly, his hands gripping your sides.
“That’s it,” you praise him gently, “Let Batman fuck you silly like you deserve.”
Jonathan peers up at you, giving you the dirtiest look he can muster as you cackle, Bruce grunting as he cums inside Jonthan’s ass and on his back.
“Christ,” Bruce sighs, pushing his hair from his face as he winces, pulling out of Jonathan’s quivering asshole.
Jonathan collapses on top of you in a mess of sweat, tears, and cum. You let him catch his breath before sliding out from under him.
“One last thing, sweetie,” you say, your tone sugary, “Sit up on the bed for us.”
Jonathan weakly pushes himself up, flipping onto his back and laying his head on the pillows.
“Touch yourself,” you demand, sitting on your knees at the end of the bed beside Bruce, “I want you to cum until you can’t cum anymore.”
Jonathan opens his mouth to protest, but you motion for him to shush, to which he tiredly gives in. You dip your hand to your slick clit, swiping at it as Jonathan strokes his sensitive cock for you. Bruce watches you and Jonathan touch yourselves, unable to really get himself up again. He instead sits behind you, playing with your tits and rubbing his large hands on your hot, sticky skin. Bruce relishes in watching Jonathan fall apart as he looks away in embarrassment.
“Keep your eyes on me, Crane,” Bruce’s voice booms, making Jonathan jump.
Jonathan gulps, reluctantly keeping eye contact with Bruce as he bucks into his hand, moaning hoarsely as he gets close. He can’t help but think about how he was between the two of you, getting fucked by you and Bruce at the same time. With that, cum shoots from his overused cock onto his stomach, and he cries out in embarrassment when you demand he get off again.
You stay like that, letting Bruce replace your hand as you spread your legs further open to allow him to fuck you with his fingers. You bounce on them, moaning quietly as Jonathan fights to keep his eyes open, his wrist flicking to the best of his ability. The night goes on, and Jonathan eventually taps out, sobbing almost uncontrollably as he runs out of cum. You and Bruce give him time alone before slowly moving him to the shower, where you help him wash off. You and your husband also washed yourselves off, assisting Jonathan out of the shower when you were all done. He’s wrapped in a towel, wincing as he walks back to the bed and curls up under the covers. You follow suit, wrapping your arms around Jonathan and soothing him as he finally falls asleep. Bruce holds you from behind, sighing contently.
“Too bad it takes doing this to humble a villain,” Bruce jokes.
“And the fact I could help was exciting,” you chuckle, “I never get to fight criminals like you do.”
“Maybe you should. You’ve got the mouth for it. Your sass is unmatched,” Bruce buries his nose in your hair.
“Mmm, I think I’m good,” you say, stroking Jonathan’s hair out of his face, “One villain is enough for me, I think.”
You and Bruce quietly watch the evil, despicable fucker sleep soundly.
“Can we keep him?” you ask Bruce, to which he tries not to burst out laughing.
“So you can torture him more? Absolutely.”
“Awesome.”
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚ a residue series installment ୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
m’no good
✎ elementary-teacher!reader (miss.honey) x biker!benny 🏍️
summary: in which honey gets the call from johnny that benny’s in the hospital :( cal takes her to him. :’)
warnings: talks of being beaten, descriptions of injury, cursing, lying, crying, being judgy again. it’s an emotional one to say the least, but there’s some sweet moments & a happy ending :)
author’s note: this is NOT in order with the last two parts posted. instead, it’s a future installment in “bein’ married.” you can find the timeline in da main hive masterlist. this is heavily based on the events of the bikeriders movie of benny getting beat up & hospitalized. of course this is my own made-up spin on the situation at hand. idk this idea struck me at 3am & i wrote it in less than a day, so i figured i’d just release it now. you can find a mention of this scenario in session 1 of from the hive 🎙️🐝 this can be read alone if you like, but the interview context could help for sure! x
+ also if you were wondering, i personally picture honey as brittany murphy’s character in uptown girl’s molly gunn! i’ve been obsessing over her style in it & that’s what inspired honey’s style in my writing — especially with the embroidered overalls. you can picture her however you please, & i hope you continue to do as yourself ofc <3
word count: 4.7k (2x longer than the other parts, yay!)
💌 requests are open, send ‘em honey 💋
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
You were in the midst of Sunday dinner with your parents when you got the news. News that would leave you scrambling out of the house in an instant with no thoughts behind your honeydew drop eyes besides him — besides Benny.
Your Pa was comfortable at the head of the table, a cigarette between his lips as he scanned the paper under reading glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. Your Ma had just taken her seat at the table, a forkful stabbing into her salad. So when the phone rang your Pa didn’t even flinch. A result of him being too engrossed in his paper. On the other hand, your Ma sighed in a way that made you know she was evidently too tired to be on her feet again. This led you to announce that you’d get the phone. And you did, pulling it off the reciever and twisting your little finger around the warm yellow chord.
“Hi, you’ve reached The BeeHive. Honey speaking!” You chirped into the phone in your usual honey coated tone. Between your family business that consisted of beekeeping and honey jarring, answering the phone in such a way became rather customary and oddly normal. So much so that no one seemed to bat an eye besides your cousins who laughed every time they called. Absolute menaces indeed.
“Honey?” It was Johnny’s drawl on the line, rough and edgy with a twinge of something you couldn’t catch.
“Oh hi Joh— Mr. Davis!” You cleared your throat and corrected yourself. Trying to remain formal. Trying to remain respectable. Sure, you and Johnny were far from past that. Calling him Johnny instead of Mr. Davis was an entirely different respect that only you, Benny, the wives, and the rest of the guys would ever understand. So your parents? Well, they wouldn’t get that, and besides his kids were still your students after all. “How’s it goin’? Y’need to speak to my Pa? He’s right ‘ere.” You asked, your father’s demeanor easily shifting at the mention, his paper going flat against the table. It wasn’t unusual for Johnny to call your house. No — Johnny was a consistent buyer of your family’s honey. He incorporated it into the Club, handing the guys out honey beers during picnics and meetings. He learned of it from those community events you frequented with your parents, always having some sort of incorporation when catering was involved.
“Nah — nah.” He brushed that idea away rather quickly and your brows furrowed in confusion. “Gotta speak to yuh. Look I — I needa tell y’something, but if your Pa’s overhearin’ I need yuh to pretend we’re talking about the girls, alright?”
“I —“ you began but stopped short trying to compartmentalize what he was saying without reacting. “Oh, right I remember we were gonna talk about the girls' grades, yeah?” You rambled out, your words feeling far too thick coming out of your mouth, it almost didn’t sound like you. You feared your parents would catch on instantly, but instead their interest deflated as soon as nothing you said resembled anything to do with their business. It only took a second for your father to go back to his paper and beer and your mother to her salad.
“That’a good, Honey. Very good.” Johnny praised as you motioned with your hand that you were gonna step out of a sec, which really meant you were gonna pull the chord as far as you could into the other room. The distance — well it wasn’t much. The open archway from your parent’s kitchen to the living room wasn’t sound proof, so they could still technically hear every word you said, but your volume would be at lower frequency for sure, and your reactions practically undefinable.
“They’re doing real good, Mr. Davis. Bright girls you got there.” You muttered out so Johnny would know you were still there. You could feel your heart going a mile a minute as you paced the short distance available you could in restraint of the phone.
“I know. I know. They love ya, Honey, and they’re just fine. No need to worry ‘ere.” He reassured you, and a sigh of relief escaped your lips. The last thing you needed to hear was something bad about those babies. It would absolutely break your heart. But what you weren’t expecting to hear was something that would shatter it into a million little pieces. “It’s uh — it’s Benny.” Johnny said, and every fiber of your being went on fire, burning to ash. “He’s — he’s banged up, Honey. Got ‘im in the hospital and everything. ‘parently some jackasses got ‘im real good at some pub not too far from us. Beat him the fuck up, and broke his foot. Could’a lost the damn thing over his colors.”
A gasp left your lips in an instant, and you almost choked as you swallowed down a whimper to conceal the sudden volcano of tears bound to erupt. Now you understood why Johnny wanted — no needed this conversation to be under wraps. Your parents were already nervous about your ridin’ and to hear about some guys jumping your husband for bein’ part of the Club 'would have your parents in a frenzy. “I’m — I’m so sorry t—to hear that, J — Mr. Davis.” You continued the facade, a facade that pained you even more now as you tied back your emotions so forcfully wanting to rip from the seams. “Is your l-little girl okay?”
“He’s fine. They’re takin’ good care of him last I heard from Cockroach. He’s up and talkin’. Took ‘im to the hospital on the West End.” Johnny explained and little by little, piece by piece the fragments of your heart were starting to come back together, but you knew for certain, they wouldn’t be mended until you saw him. Until you got to touch him. Inspect him. Coddle him. Got to know who the fuck messed with him. “Go ‘n see ‘im. He needs his wife, alright?”
“I will.” You assured him, stepping back to peek through the archway at your parents who were still eating. Thankfully nothing seemed amiss. “I’ll be over soon with the homework she’s gonna miss for the week. Does she need anything else from me? Need a friend to bring her books home tomorrow?” You added in code. Code for ‘Who the fuck did this to him, and how could you help make sure those fuckers never got as close as a mile away from Benny again?’
“Nah. Don’t you be worryin’ now, Honey. The guys and I are on it. We’ll take care of ‘em. You take care of ‘im.” He settled on the plan. “Capisce?”
A wave of relief washed over you then. A relief that could only come from Johnny’s word alone. Cause you knew he’d take care of it. He always did. “Capisce.” You sniffled, not caring anymore if your parents caught on.
“Cal’s already on the way to pick ya up at your Ma’s.” He informed you. “Told ‘em to park around the corner so there’s no suspicion. You can tell ‘em you're stoppin’ by the house.” You never thought a time like this would leave you feeling extra grateful that Johnny and his family only lived a block away from your parents. But here you were, feeling just that.
You wanted to thank him then. The words were resting against your tongue heavily, so you made do with what you could. “Thank you, Mr. Davis. I’ll tell ‘em you said ‘ello. Please send my parents regards to your wife and the girls. I’ll be there soon.”
“Anything for ya n’ Benny. Y’know that. Yuh take care of y’self now, o—kay?”
“Mhm,” you hummed, itching to run out of your house and into Benny’s arms already. If you could. God, you sure hoped he wasn’t too banged up for a cuddle or two. Makin’ him feel a whole lot better was your main concern. “Bye Mr. Davis. See ya soon,” you spoke into the line before stepping heavily across the threshold and accidently putting the phone back on the hook with a little more aggression than you anticipated.
“Sorry,” you tensed and broke out in an innocent smile, “I gotta go to Mr. Davis’s. His girl is sick real bad with the Flu. Doctors says she’ll be out of school for a week and of course there’s all this important testin’ going on. Gotta keep ‘er on track, y’know? Such a good cookie. Get in a fit if she misses one lick of school.” You rambled on, adding more and more to lie you rather not tell, but knew it was for their own good. For your own good. For Benny’s. Your marriage. Your future. What you’d hope would become a bundle of joy or two with his pretty blue eyes and freckled face to match.
“‘Course she does. She’s a Davis after all.” Your father added, a fond smile stretching across his face.
“Oh that’s too bad,” your mother frowned, and then stood unexpectedly, her chair scraping against the kitchen flooring. “Here, I’ll pack ya some honey buns to take to ‘er.” Before you could protest your Ma was already piling some of her homemade buns into a metal cookie container and passing them to you.
“Real sweet, Mama.” You could feel your eyes startin’ to tear up again, that familiar wave of remembrance coming back to remind you what you were really leaving for. A wave of impatience that made your anxieties spike higher and higher at the prospect of more minutes ticking away without you being next to Benny. “M’sure it’ll make ‘er feel so much better in no time.” You kissed your Ma on the cheek in appreciaton and turned to head out.
“Wait,” your Ma said right when you were about to exit the front door with your backpack in tow. Thankfully she didn’t see you mouth a curse into the air with your back towards her. “Y’didn’t even get to touch your dinner. Will ya be back to finish it or should I wrap it up?”
“Nah. That’s ‘ight.” You declined. “I still got leftovers in the fridge for me and Benny from Rosie’s. Heat it up when I get home, but thanks Mama. Save it for yuh and Pa.”
“‘ight. Get’ome safe, Honey.” She called out. Safe. Safe. Benny didn’t get home safe, but he was safe now. Safe in the hospital that is, but was he really safe?
Your fingers gripped the doorhand, knuckles burning white as you took a breath to calm yourself. “I will, Mama. Love ya. Bye!” And then you were out the door, trying to keep your composure as long as you could, until you were out of eyeshot of your Ma and Pa’s. Your ballet flat feet banged against the pavement as you went on running down the rest, a sharp turn at the corner showing Cal by his bike, waiting and ready for you. A fresh cigarette between his lips, just ‘bout to be lit, long forgotten once his eyes landed on you.
It only took one look at him. One frown on those deep set features of his for you to be barrelling at him, strong arms encircling you in a hug.
“Oh Cal!” You cried into his tattered shirt, the dame of tears breaking out of you uncontrollably. Too uncontrollably. But you didn’t care. Couldn’t care. It was Cal after all. The brother you never had. The brother you should have had. The family you now had because of Benny. Because of Johnny. And it wasn’t that you didn’t love your parents — you loved and appreciated them of course, but you never felt fully accepted by them. So being in Cal’s arms was far more comforting than being in the arms of your parents because you could be yourself with Cal, without judgment.
“M’so sorry, Honey. So sorry.” He mumbled into your sun kissed up-do, smelling of fresh vanilla and honey scented soap.
You were crying so hard. Too hard. You’d become a total mess of hiccups and hard breathes. Of course, Cal accessed you accordingly, pulling you from his chest to take a good look at ya. And boy did your rosey cheeks and red rimmed glossy coated eyes destroy him. They really did. He hated seein’ you like this. All the guys did. They loved you far too much.
Cal’s warm calloused fingers circled the apples of your cheeks, brushing away the tear tracks that resided. “It’s gonna be ‘ight. ‘erything gonna be okay.” He cooed, trying to calm you down. “Gotta stay strong for ‘im so he can get betta. Can’t take ya like this. It’ll break ‘im, Honey.”
“I — I know. I know.” You squeezed your eyes shut, wet lashes bowing down. You took a breath. Then another. And another until you felt somewhat better. More calm that is.
“Ready t’go?” Cal asked carefully when he noticed your breaths evening out.
“Mhm,” you hummed, nodding your head.
Cal helped you onto his bike and you clung onto him as you rode. The weight of his jacket felt oddly comforting in your hold. Even though the circumstances of such colors were alarming in such a time, it didn’t leave you on edge by any means. Before you knew it, you were pulling up in the West End. Cal parked his bike, leading you to the front desk and of course the receptionist looked at the two of you kind-of funny.
“Family only.” She said to Cal, immediately putting two-and-two together who he was here for before turning to you, a big smile gracing her features. “How can I help ya, Miss?”
Your emotions were all over the place. Anger bubbling up inside you in an instant, ready to burst at the assumption of such a thing. Sure, it was a common mistake. To be misplaced next to one of the guys in your floral knitted cardigan and patterned jeans to match. But now — now, of all times. It was your last straw.
“That’s ‘is wife. Uh — Honey Cross.” Cal motioned to you, explaining who you were before your rage could ensue.
“Hm — I don’t see a Honey here,” the receptionist said, amusement crossing her features. Clearly pleased by shooting Cal’s advances in an instant. “I’m going to need to see some ID.” She pushed, and you were already ripping off your backpack before she could even finish the sentence.
Cal’s hands materialized around the straps without a second thought, helping you out of the thing but also holding it up for you while you fished for your bedazzled wallet. It was in the deep depths of the thing, mushed around with all your work sheets and lesson plans for the week. You were always equipped and extra prepared, making your supposed trip to the Davis’s for his little girl not amiss one bit. Your cutesy keychain clipped to the end flung about as you finally uncovered it, whipping out your ID with ease. This wasn’t your first rodeo in such a situation, learning from the last time Benny was tossed in a jail cell to get your ID updated with your new last name as soon as humanly possible.
The receptionist looked between you, Benny’s paperwork, and your ID for longer than necessary. “Hmmm, okay. Second floor room twelve, Mrs. Cross.” She finally gave in. “But you’ll have to stay here, Mister.” She told Cal.
He raised his hands up in the air like he was bound to be incarcerated, and the sight almost got a laugh out of you. Almost. “Fine. I’ll be out front when y’ready, Honey.” He informed you, and you nodded.
He helped you put your things back together, and when he caught wind of your name etched into your ID, his eyes widened. “Huh? So that’s y’real name then.”
“Mhm,” you hummed, wedging the thing back into your wallet, snapping it close. And if you thought the receptionist was suspicious earlier, she was far more suspicious now.
His features scrunched up in an innocent way, that long earring of his shaking as he shook his head. “S’cute, but I can’t see ya as anything else but Honey. Be weird if I called y’anything else.”
“I get it,” the edge of your clip curled up in a faint smile then. Your first smile in what felt like ages. You couldn’t help it with Cal. It was hard not to smile around him. “Feels weird calling you Calvin, Caleb, or Calum or whatever. Which is it anyways?” You asked, brows furrowed in confusion at the thought as you zipped your bag closed.
“Don’t matter now.” He patted your shoulders once your backpack was shelled around you. “Time to go see y’man, anyways.”
Turning on your heel, you nodded when you faced him, thanking him profusely and giving him a sweet kiss on the cheek as you gave him a tight hug. Once you let him go, you were off. Darting across the halls and climbing up the stairs, you weaved around the patients in their hospital beds being pushed by nurses and doctors in their lab coats until you made it to room twelve. For a moment, you stopped in your tracks, attempting a warm honey smile to grace your hubby with. To distract him from the evident pain he was having and the deep rooted distraught you felt inside.
But once you turned the corner, oh — you were a goner. There was Benny with a blue blooming zygoma, a swollen and bandaged eye, and his right foot propped up in a form fitted cast. Your heart shattered all over again without your control. Your hubby looked like a beat up puppy dog, and you couldn’t help but frown at the sight.
His blues — well his good one that is — caught your eye immediately. It was hard not to when you came waltzing in like that, all dolled up in a swarming buzz of color and sweet honey perfume. It wafted across the room and the smell touched his nose, warming him up for the first time since he’s been placed in this cold sterile room.
“Honey?” He blinked. Once. Twice. Wondering if your sweet face was an apparition. He told Cockroach not to tell you. Didn’t want you to see ‘im like this. Not until he was out and the brusin’ subsided at least, but he guessed Roach forgot to relay the message to Johnny and the rest of the guys when he told ‘em.
“Oh — my poor baby!” You cooed, racing across the room as soon as his gravelly voice hit your ears. You dotted on him in an instant. Fitting your form on the small empty space at the edge of the bed near his hip, you didn’t even bother pulling over the chair adjacent to his bed. And Benny didn’t mind no.
Even though he wasn’t too happy to see you here, he was happy to feel you here.
Your hand brushed through his hair and caressed the good side of his face, sweet and delicate. Benny couldn’t help but lean his cheek into your comforting touch. For the very first time you watched as a hot warm tear trickled down his cheek and landed on your hand.
“Please don’t let’em take my foot,” he begged, his large warm hands circling around both of yours and dropping them in his lap. “If — If they take my foot then I can’t ride again, and — and then how will I-I take y’to school?”
His sweep of emotions took you by surprise. You’d never seen him cry. Not when he was beaten and bruised in a bar fight. Not when a shard of glass wedged itself into his skin after punching through a car window. Not when you were applying alcohol to his cuts or when he was gettin’ stitches. No Benny never cried. And here he was now. Crying in front of you. In front of his wife. God, of course that just wrecked you.
Sure, maybe someone else would have made a stink. Would have told him that there were bigger things to worry about then his riding. But you wouldn’t do that — no. Besides you, ridin’ was Benny’s biggest passion. And both showed in the way he was most concerned about you. Concerned about taking care of you. How’d he do that if they took his foot and couldn’t take you to work every day. You couldn’t drive. Didn’t know how. It’s not that you didn’t want to, you just never had the time to go get your driver’s license. Not between working at the local diner while you were studying and getting your degree. And now that you had it and Benny well — you had all that you really needed.
“I won’t let ‘em, baby. I promise. I promise.” You assured, pulling his strong hands up with yours and kissing each and every rough rimmed knuckle of his. “As for takin’ me to school. Don’t you worry about that. Took the bus before I met y’anyways. Doesn’t make a difference. I’ll do it until you’re better again, alright?”
But it did make a difference. It did to him. He adored those mornings and afternoons when he had you on the back of his bike, taking you to and from school. He especially loved it when you were still living with your Ma and Pa. It was the little things like that that not only got him through his day, but also made him feel like he was doing something good. Doing something good by you. Makin’ himself seem responsible enough to your parents for being on time and prompt, to marry you. And it worked after a while. He had you now as his wife. In the apartment you shared. In his home. In his bed. While that was all good and great, he couldn’t help but wonder if something like this would set them off.
He grimaced, the thoughts gnawing at him and makin’ him ask you, “do y’parents know?”
“No, no. They don’t. Think I’m at Johnny’s dropping off homework for his sick little girl. Think you’re at work. ‘Member I told ‘em you were working today so you didn’t have to come?” You reminded him.
It wasn’t uncommon for you to throw a little white lie around here and there to your parents about Benny. Sure, he was on good terms with them now thanks to Johnny. Thanks to the fact that their little girl had him as her husband, and they didn’t have too much of a choice. But, that didn’t mean things were perfect. Benny wasn’t much of a fan at the way they treated you from time to time. Especially when they made comments about your decisions. About the way you dressed. He thought you were perfect as is, and it boiled his blood whenever he heard them goin’ on and on about it, especially at Sunday dinners. So sometimes he just didn’t come. Sometimes you didn’t go either. But of course you did today cause you felt bad you hadn’t been in awhile and felt like you needed to see ‘em. They were your parents after all. Now you were regretting not going with him instead. Maybe none of this would have happened if you had never gone to your parents in the first place.
“Hm, right,” he sighed, squeezing your hand in appreciation. “How was it anyways? Did they give ya a hard time?”
“No. Not today,” you replied. “Didn’t have time to. Didn’t even get t��sit down. I should’ve been with y’anyways.”
“No y’shouldn’t of.” He shook his head in disagreement, and then revealed, “m’no good for ya, baby.”
“What?!” You gasped, absolutely baffled by what he was sayin’. “What you goin’ on about?” He hadn’t just really said that? Had he? He did! “S’not true. Not true at all.” Your cute little bee earrings shook as you moved your head back and forth in earnest. “You’re too good t’me —“ He bowed his head down in a silent no. “Far too good,” you repeated, trying to search his eye so he could see you. Really see that you meant every word you were sayin’. “Y’loyal to Johnny and the guys. To me.” You reminded him, but his gaze was still downwards, trained on your conjoined hands in his lap. You brushed your thumb back and forth against his skin. “Lemme ask you somethin’..” you began, “What did y’do when those guys came up to ya, huh?”
“Told ‘em they’d have to kill me to get my jacket off,” he revealed, his response making your lips curl up soundly. That was your Benny right there, your loyal Benny.
“And why’s that?” You asked, pushing on. Trying to get him to the root of his decision.
“Cause…” he shrugged, taking a moment to think about it. “It represents my family….represents you. Hell, I got your patches on it!” His voice was slowly rising in defense, in bits of anger. “Got your name sewed over my heart bigger than a goddamn weddin’ ring will ever be and those fuckers laughed about it!”
A full, bright toothed smile had your dimples peaked like two pretty mountains, and when Benny’s eyes finally found your sweet honey speckled ones — well his anger dissipated. “Ah, c’mere.”
“I don’t wanna crush y—“ you began, worrying about hurting him, but he cut you off immediately.
“C’mere,” he cooed, scooting over just a tad so you could lay next to ‘em. Of course you couldn’t say no to him. Could never ever. Not when he wanted y’so bad. “Need my girl.”
“Alright, alright,” you hummed, rolling your eyes playfully as you curled yourself next to ‘em. A comfortable silence landed over the two of you, one that you were thankful for after everything. After all the fuss of the day. You just wished you could be just like this with him at home in your own bed. His strong arm wrapped around your back, hand cupping your shoulder and you tilted your head onto his own. His lips found your forehead quickly, feeling more pillowy than usual from the impact on his face and your eyes fluttered at the contact. “Oh that reminds me. Did ya eat?”
“Huh?” He hummed confused.
“Did they feed y’here yet?” You tried again.
“Nah,” he replied.
“Fuckin’ hell. Got y’propped up, but can’t feed ya…” you shook your head in disappointment, and your concern for him over something so miniscule within the swarm of everything warmed his heart tenfold.
You moved to get up, but he stopped you short with his hand that was once on your shoulder now materializing on your waist. “Where y’going?” He pouted.
“Nowhere, baby.” You assured him, fingers curling under the good side of his chin so you could leave a soft kiss on his lips which he relaxed in as soon as it came. “Just grabbin’ my bag from the floor. Got some grub — well…” you trailed off, a laugh escaping you as you unzipped your bag and took out the tin your mother gave you. “I know it ain’t dinner, but I say dessert won’t hurt. Doctor’s orders, y’know?” You opened the tin to reveal the fresh honey buns your Mama made then, and God did Benny wanna just eat you up instead. “Y’want?”
He nodded, so you didn’t hesitate in passing one over to him. Both of you enjoyed the sweet treat. So much so, that when a crumb or two fell on your chest, Benny dived right in to access it — and well who were you to protest when his soft lips met your warm skin? When his lips continued their assault around your fingers, cleaning off the sugary residue that remained. And you were happy. So happy and giddy because you were with your Benny. You knew no matter what happened. No matter what came next, the two of you would be alright. Cause that was what marriage was all about, signing up for the good, the bad, and the ugly, being there for each other in sickness and in health.
And in that short hour or so that remained in visiting hours, before the nurse flagged you down to kick you out, you laughed and giggled more than you had in days, and even when you scolded him, warning that a nurse may catch him licking down your chest or sucking your fingers, a smile graced your sweet features the entire time and Benny ate up every single second soundly.
“I fuckin’ love ya, y’know that Mrs. Cross?” He said to you at some point, in the midst of everything.
“I fuckin’ love ya too, Mr. Cross. Always and forever.”
And always and forever it was.
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
additional author’s note: AH I COULDN’T HELP MYSELF. PWETTY PLZ DON’T BE MAD AT ME FOR JUMPING OUT OF ORDER. (with a cherry on top 🍒)
my requests are open for any miss honey x benny cross works + any convos about these two in general. don’t be shy honey, i’m all for yapping in the asks.
+ don’t forget to comment if you’d like be added to “da bee hive” (my version of da tag list)
smoochies. all da love xanadu 💋
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#miss honey x benny cross#from the hive 🎙️🐝#benny cross x reader#johnny davis#cal the bikeriders#the bikeriders fanfiction#austin butler fanfiction#tom hardy#benny cross fanfiction#a residue installment#residue da series#the bikeriders x reader
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The Coyotes Cry-Two
*gif made by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*
Pairings: MafiaBoss!TattooArtist! Noah Sebastian x OFC.
Warnings/Tropes: reverse harem/why chose in most parts of this story, violence, death, swearing, angst, fluff, forced proximity, forbidden love, dark romance, mafia themes, arranged marriage, tattoo artist, smut(very mature: P in V unprotected, masturbation, oral with male and female receiving, dry humping, knife play, blood play, period sex, Dom! Noah, mask play, choking, degradation, fingering, hand jobs, voyeurism, public sex, reverse harem which means one woman with multiple partners, sometimes together.)
Summary: Saoirse "Scar" McManus's life is turned upside down when her father and uncle marry her off to Noah Sebastian, the Ruler of The Concrete Jungle and Leader of OMNS, her old high school crush. A marriage based on secrets and lies comes back to destroy OMNS and The Concrete Jungle from within. When Scar has no choice but to step foot into the The Grey looking for help, she realizes the price of love comes in a nest full of darkness.
Authors Note: Well after four months, we FINALLY have an update! It is a very long one so buckle up. This series will have mature themes throughout as a warning! This one probably wont be updated nearly as quick as JP will be. Maybe once JP is finished, I'll have more time to update this one!
*I do not own the rights/names of Connor and Murphy McManus. Or anyone mentioned to the Boondock Saints.
Tags[CLOSED]: @sammyjoeee @happi-goth @lma1986 @iknownothingpeople @vinyardmauro @malice-ov-mercy @wheezybrenda @thisbicc @malerieee @mrs-zimmerman @srorgana1 @miserylovescompany1195-blog @embracethereaper42 @lizzieseveride @eclipseeetop @sundamariis @calleyx13 @krisslee18 @princessgh0st @aprosiacperson @xxrainstorm @ourdiabolikal-rapture @iamamatus @klutzy-kay24 @bngurngheart @idwt-money @rain-down-on-me @themodern-daywednesday @oxythoughtin7715 @cncohshit @bleachampion @xserenax-13 @collidewiththesavannah @karenfranco @amelia-acero @tashka @themortaljessica @shayzillaaaa @badomensls @princesspeach-00 @blueskylinesx @shadowseve @sorrowsofsilence @shilohrosechicken @flowery-mess @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @respectfulrebel @pathion @supersquirrel1996 @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelosmal @lma1986 @dsireland86 @wild-child-7747 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @thatchickwiththecamera @whenthesummerdies @madomens
SCAR
Everything was so fucked.
How was my life bartered for a way of peace without my consent?
I understand it was something I had to do, for the family. But surely there had to be another way, right?
Wrong, if there was you wouldn’t be standing next to Noah Sebastian in an elevator as he was about to show you your new home. Not to mention, sharing a bed with him.
I nearly fell onto my ass when he told me that there was only one bedroom in his penthouse and we would be sharing a bed. I grumbled at my thoughts, crossing my arms over my chest; something Noah picked up on with a raised brow.
“Everything alright?”
“No,” I scoffed while facing him in the small elevator. “Everything is not alright. I have to get married to you without a choice, I have to share a bed with you, and not to mention, you just told me I have to work in your tattoo shop. In a matter of minutes, my entire life changed!”
My screechy voice echoed in the small confines of the elevator and Noah leaned against the back wall with a smirk on his face.
“You think this is funny?” I scoffed while crossing my arms over my chest. “My free will is gone and you’re laughing.”
Suddenly, his face sobered as he stood tall, with dark eyes staring down at me through even darker tendrils of hair.
“Let me make one thing clear, Scar. You have free will. You can come and go as you please but need to return. Just because we’re going to be married that doesn't mean you’re signing your life away.”
I blinked, mouth agape. “Scar?”
“I like it,” Noah shrugged as if he really didn’t see the problem with shortening my name.
“And if I don’t like it?” I still had my arms crossed but now I had my left hip popped out, showcasing the attitude I’ve had since birth.
Something flashed in his eyes just as the elevator doors behind me opened.
“Too bad, it stays,” he muttered before grabbing my bags and walking past me.
Turning slowly on my heels, I noticed that the elevator opened to a vast darkness, Noah’s footsteps echoing. I didn’t move, not even when he turned on the bright lights showcasing his large penthouse.
Our large penthouse, I corrected myself.
Slowly stepping off the elevator, I peered around my new surroundings. Currently, I was standing in the foyer, and to my left was a long hallway that I assumed led to the bedrooms. To my right was a wall that had two large bookcases built into it. I quickly made a mental note to browse Noah’s large collection and then took a few tentative steps into the open space before me.
It was an open concept of a kitchen and living room combo. To the left was the kitchen and I sucked in a breath at the gorgeous design. Black cabinets with gold fixtures. A kitchen island in the middle big enough to fit two Thanksgiving dinner spreads. I noticed that he didn’t have a dining room table, only eight stools that lined the kitchen island.
The living room was simple with a large forest green sectional couch, a fireplace, and a large television above it. Although it was still nicely decorated with fine things, there was still an empty feeling that crept over my bones.
“I find it hard to believe that this huge place only has one bedroom,” I said with my hands on my hips.
Noah, who was leaning his lower half onto the back of the couch with his arms over his chest, gave me a sly smirk.
“I never said there was only one bedroom.”
I stared at him with wide eyes. “So then why do I have to share a bed with you?”
He pushed himself up so he could look down at me. “There are three rooms. Besides our bedroom, one is my office, and the other is locked up. No one goes in there.”
“Are you hiding dead bodies in there?” I teased with a raised brow.
“No, that's what the room underneath the shop is for,” Noah deadpanned.
My lips parted, mimicking a fish, as the words died on my tongue. I knew given his line of work that Noah undoubtedly killed people. The rumors around town told me. I did my best to not be involved in my father's and uncle's nefarious dealings, but every so often my uncle would bring me in during one of their meetings, much to my father's dismay. My uncle thought I needed to know the inner workings of the Irish mob since I would take over one day. While my father didn’t want that for me. He wanted me to stay in the family home and continue to turn a blind eye to everything.
In the meetings I was brought in on, many of the men who worked under the McManus twins would tell them everything they knew about OMNS; which wasn’t a lot. Noah had done a fantastic job of keeping his dealings quiet, that was until recently when his friend Vincent showed up on his doorstep dead. After that, Noah made it his mission to find out who killed him by kidnapping my family's level drug dealers for information. None gave anything up until recently when Barry somehow managed to get OMNS a meeting with my family. If it wasn’t for that kid, maybe I wouldn’t be in this situation right now.
I never fucking liked that kid.
Every time Noah’s name was brought up in those meetings, my stomach would flutter and my heart would hammer hard in my chest; exactly like in high school. From the moment my eyes landed on him freshman year, I knew that would sink his teeth in. We never ran in the same circles but when they did cross, I was rudely reminded by my mother of the reason why during graduation when she caught me staring at Noah from across the gym.
“Saorsie, stop ogling that boy. The Sebastian men are only trouble, he will hurt you the first chance he gets.”
I rolled my eyes. “I wasn’t ogling him, mom.”
She grasped my chin, forcing me to look at her. “I’m serious, stay away from Noah Sebastian. You’re too good for him, he would only lower your stature.”
I took those words my mom said to heart because I knew Noah didn’t feel the same. The only time he ever looked at me was with distaste because of our family's long-standing history. The McManus and Sebastian rivalry would be told in the history books one day but now it seemed as if the rivalry had ended with or upcoming unions.
To keep the peace.
“So the wedding.”
My eyes snapped up from admiring Noah’s long legs. “I’m sorry, what?”
“I figured you’d want to plan it since you didn’t get a say in the groom,” he jeered while stuffing his hands deep into his pockets.
“Honestly, I’d be fine going to the courthouse and signing the needed paperwork. Get this over with,” I admitted.
This made Noah’s usual stone face falter, his eyes softening. “If that’s what you want, Scar. I’ll make an appointment first thing tomorrow.”
Clearing my throat, I stood up straighter after grabbing my bags. “Can you show me to our room? I’d like to unpack and go to sleep. It’s been a long day.”
“Yeah-,” Noah’s words were cut off by his phone ringing which he pulled out of his pants pocket.
His brows furrowed at the caller's I.D and when I peaked down at it, my heart dropped into my stomach.
“Who’s Lana?” I asked, my voice thick with jealousy.
His eyes flicked up from underneath his long lashes, a foxy smile playing on his lips.
Those lips that I’d been craving to taste ever since freshman year.
“She’s my assistant,” Noah informed.
“Does your assistant always text you this late?”
He brushed a loose strand of my fiery red hair behind my ear and chuckled. “Nothing is going on between Lana and I. She’s dating one of the artists in my shop. She was letting me know that my morning meeting was canceled.”
My mouth formed an ‘O’ shape and I suddenly threw a thumb over my shoulder. “I think I’m going to get my stuff unpacked and head to bed.”
“Come on, I’ll show you-.”
Suddenly the elevator to his penthouse made a loud ding before the doors opened, revealing a man I didn’t recognize.
Noah, who was still towering over me, snapped his head up and his shoulders fell.
“Jesse? What’s going on?”
The man, Jesse, brushed back the curls from his face and sighed. “We need you at Limits. There’s a problem.”
My eyes bounced between the two men. “Limits?”
Noah ran a hand over the few hairs that peppered his jawline. “My nightclub.”
“I didn’t know you owned a nightclub,” I said.
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Scar,” he shrugged with an indifferent look in his eyes before glancing back to Jesse. “Can you handle it? It’s why I made you the manager so you can deal with these kinds of things when I’m not there.”
Jesse hesitated for a long beat, his gaze flicking to me before settling on Noah. “You know I usually do, Noah. But there’s someone that is refusing to leave unless they talk to you.”
“Have Ash force them out,” Noah sighed while pinching his eyes shut.
“It’s Vincent’s sister. She wants an update.”
His body went rigid, hands dropping to his sides, and I felt my heart drop slightly at that name.
Vincent.
Noah’s friend who was murdered.
“You should go,” I spoke softly after a few long moments of silence.
Eventually, Noah nodded and he caught the jacket Jesse threw him mid-air, slipping it over his thick shoulders.
“I won’t be long, I promise,” he assured me.
Suddenly, all of the anger I felt about my situation faded, knowing that there was someone somewhere else dealing with something worse; a murdered brother with no answers.
“I’ll be fine,” I gave him a small nod.
“Bedroom is the last door on the left. Make yourself at home.”
Noah and Jesse were gone in a flash, leaving me alone in the quiet penthouse. It was an eerie silence, the one that made your ears ring, and I let out a long steady breath. Even though this was my home now, it didn’t feel like it. Everything here felt like Noah, which wasn’t a bad thing. His scent lingered in the air and it brought a faint smile on my lips.
Snap out of it, Scarlett! Noah doesn't think of you that way.
My brain practically screamed at me and with a shake of my head, I gathered up my bags to find the last door on the left. My eyes darted into the open door of Noah’s office and briefly could see a large black desk, a computer set up that seemed to fit a gamer, and red neon lights.
I came to a halt in front of the closed door and curiosity peaked in my mind so I tried the door knob.
Locked.
“What the hell are you hiding, Noah,” I muttered to myself before finally reaching the last door on the left.
Now there was resistance filling my veins, making me unable to cross the threshold into the bedroom. While I was interested in seeing how Noah had decorated the bedroom, I was nervous because it would mean that everything was about to become real.
The second I stepped into that room and unpacked my things, this marriage was going to happen.
Before I could make my final decision on whether to run or stay, my phone buzzed with an incoming message.
Noah Sebastian: Hi, it’s Noah. I wanted to let you know that I cleared out some space in the closet and the bathroom for your things. I mean it when I said make yourself at home, Scar. What’s mine is yours.
I couldn’t stop the smile that pulled at my lips while I replied.
Me: I know it’s you, Noah. I’ve had your number saved since high school.
Before I could pocket my phone, a new text came through.
Noah Sebastian: You had it saved? I thought for sure my number would have been blocked.
Me: Tell me what’s in the locked room and I won’t consider blocking your number.
Noah Sebastian: Not a chance, Scar.
Rolling my eyes, I pocketed my phone and gathered up all my courage with a deep breath before walking into the large bedroom.
“Holy shit,” I breathed. “Who needs this much space for one person?”
The king size bed was directly in the middle of the room, up against a wall painted black. On either side of the bed were end tables, each with their own lamp. There were floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the Concrete Jungle and now, with the late evening, it casted the room in a glow of moonlight.
There was a fireplace and what I thought was a picture above turned out to be one of those televisions that you were able to use like a picture frame. It was of some abstract colors, nothing that seemed to make sense to the human eye.
The hardwood floors creaked as I walked farther into the bedroom, noticing that there were clear walls where the fireplace was, showing the bathroom on the other side. I could see straight into the shower and bathtub from my spot in the bedroom.
On the other end of the room was a little sitting corner, made up of a long leather couch and two chairs.
The walk in closet was behind the couch and when I stepped inside, I let out a choked gasp.
“This closet is bigger than my bedroom at home,” I shook my head in disbelief.
Noah was true to his word.
There was more than half of the closet space empty, his clothes and shoes only taking up a small section of the closet.
With a sigh, I went about unpacking all of my things, spending a few hours arranging my clothes by types of shirts and pants. Shoes by heels or flats. Jewelry by necklaces, bracelets, and rings.
Rings.
Glancing down at my bare left hand, I tried to envision how it would look with a wedding ring and I couldn’t help but shudder. Everything was happening so fast and I didn’t even get the chance to let the news settle in yet that this whole arrangement was made without my consent.
Carrying my bag full of toiletries over to the even larger bathroom, I made a mental note to take a very long soak in the deep jacuzzi bathtub as I went about putting everything in its place. There were two sinks and with Noah already taking over the one on the left, I chose the one on the right.
As I was about to leave the bathroom, I caught sight of Noah’s cologne and pursed my lips.
Sauvage by Dior.
After spraying a quick spritz on my sweater, I went back into the closet to put away my suitcases. There was a small area in the far back that took a few finessing to make them fit but it caused something to fall off of a shelf next to me.
Miracle High School. 2013-2014.
It was Noah’s highschool yearbook.
“I haven’t seen one of these in so long,” I said while kneeling on the floor of the closet, opening the book in my lap.
Familiar faces stared back at me as I slowly flipped through it but came to a stop at one picture.
Me.
I was with my old group of friends, most of whom I didn’t talk to anymore, and the smile on my face was so fake. I thought I was happy back then, the facade I put on tricked even me. But after I graduated, I realized how much of a liar I had been. I had to put on this show of the privileged rich girl to appease my mother when in fact, I hated who I was. I despised being in the popular group and desperately wanted to hang out with the artsy kids because that's where I felt my heart deserved to be.
Just as I was about to flip the page, something else caught my eye; a written note next to my picture.
One look at your eyes and I cave in. One taste of the life now I crave it. So give me something beautiful. So give me something else. I need another miracle. I really need some help, I need a miracle.
I frowned, feeling my heart sink to the depths of my stomach, and looked for the picture on the next page.
Noah Sebastian.
Back in highschool, his hair was longer, down to the middle of his back. He did have tattoos, not as many as he did now, but the snake and apple tattoo on his neck poked out from the collar of his shirt. It was customary that all seniors took professional pictures for their yearbook photos but that wasn’t who Noah was.
His senior picture was one of him sitting in a computer chair with a gaming headset on and those adorable gold round glasses while throwing up the peace sign; showcasing those hand tattoos I spent countless hours staring at during our history class together.
Slowly closing the book, I set it back in its place on the highest self before leaving the closet. With a quick glance at my phone, I noticed it was nearing nine in the evening and even though I was exhausted, my stomach growling reminded me that I skipped dinner earlier.
Once back in the large kitchen, I found the remote for the television and turned it on. I had to flip through the channels until finally landing on The Crow and then went about searching the cabinets and fridge for food.
“Does this man not eat?” I groaned when I saw how bare everything was.
Me: You have nothing to eat in this big ass penthouse.
I expected Noah not to text back right away, figuring he was busy dealing with what was happening over at Limits, so when my phone buzzed a few seconds after I sent the message, my heart fluttered.
Noah Sebastian: What are you in the mood for? Indian? Italian? Greek?
You.
Shaking the thought from my head, I typed out my reply.
Me: I’ll just run out and pick something up.
Before I could even lock my phone, Noah’s response appeared on screen.
Noah Sebastian: The Concrete Jungle is not safe at night. Please stay inside. I’ll order whatever you want. My treat.
Pursing my lips, I glanced up to the window, seeing the tall buildings outside, and thought about it for a moment. The Concrete Jungle was Noah’s domain, he created it. But if he said it was dangerous in the dark, I had to believe him.
Me: Greek. One gyro. Hold the veggies. Extra feta cheese and tzatziki sauce.
Me: Large fries and a Dr. Pepper.
Me: We also can’t live off of fast food every day. How can I cook something with one cracked egg, baking soda, and stale ass bread?
While I waited for his reply, I decided to snoop around the penthouse. Off of the kitchen was his laundry room and for a moment, I thought about switching his loads but decided that I should leave it. A guy like him had someone come clean and do his laundry. Just as I was about to take a shower, my phone went off from its spot on the bathroom counter.
Noah Sebastian: I’ve made more with less. But we can go shopping tomorrow, you can get whatever you like.
I thought about replying with a witty remark but knowing that he was probably dealing with something deep at Limits, I decided against it.
Me: You’re going to regret saying that.
Noah Sebastian: So far, when it comes to you I haven’t regretted anything.
My heart jumped in my throat as I read those words a few times over and with a sigh, I locked my phone. I didn’t bother asking him when he would get back because I had a feeling whatever was happening, it wasn’t something that was considered a quick chat.
By the time I was dressed in my pajamas, there was a loud buzzing coming from the elevator of the penthouse. For some reason, there was a fear that filled me from being here alone and not knowing who was slowly rising up the elevator.
Me: Were you expecting company? I think someone rang the buzzer for the elevator.
My bare feet padded down the long hallway and once I stood in front of the elevator, my heart began to beat wildly. I wasn’t exactly dressed for company, wearing a pair of white cotton shorts and a loose tank top.
Noah Sebastian: It’s your food, Scar.
Oh.
Me: Oh, right.
I wasn’t sure why I was so on edge about the possibility of someone coming into Noah’s penthouse without me knowing. Maybe it was because no one knew about our arrangement so it could have been a late night fuck buddy? Maybe it was because Noah was one of the most feared mafia bosses and ruled the Concrete Jungle so someone was coming to get their revenge.
Noah Sebastian: No one can come upstairs without the code. The delivery driver left your food with Gary, the doorman. He’s been working at OMNS Legacy Villas for years and he��s the only one with the code. You can trust him.
I snorted at that word; trust. There were only two people in my life I could trust and they sold me off for a peace treaty.
Me: Trust isn’t a word that’s in my vocabulary.
The elevator doors dinged open, revealing a paper bag in the middle of it. With a quick swipe, the scent of Greek food tickled my nostrils and my stomach grumbled to life. I spread everything out on the large kitchen island and went about eating in silence while watching the movie. It wasn’t until I noticed the time on the large clock on the far end of the wall that it was almost eleven in the evening and without a new text from Noah, I thought about texting him but figured I’d be bothering him.
Once I cleaned up my mess from dinner, I stood in front of the large windows that overlooked the Concrete Jungle. Bright lights bathed over the dirty streets, littered with not only trash but crime as well. On the far end of the corner, I watched as a drug deal went down followed by an attempt at a carjacking. With the angle of how high up the penthouse was, I could see down to Under The Right Lights Tattoo; closed up for the night.
“How did I go from studying animal biology to working in a tattoo shop?” I grumbled to myself while pushing off of the windows.
“Talking to yourself?”
Whirling around, I saw Noah standing in the middle of the living room with his hair a disheveled mess and blood splatter over his shirt. I blinked rapidly, trying to assess the situation in front of me.
“I-,” I pointed to the elevator. “I didn't hear you come up.”
Noah had his hands hiding in the pockets of his black dress slacks and I couldn’t help but picture how they were covered in blood.
“I took the back staircase,” he shrugged before gliding over to the kitchen and popping a few of my leftover fries in his mouth.
I shifted on my feet, watching how unbothered he was.
“You have a back staircase?”
Noah’s eyes flashed to me. “We have a back staircase for times like this. I can’t exactly walk through the lobby looking like this.”
“Right,” I pursed my lips while nodding.
A weird silence fell between us, I was unsure what to do or say, so instead I continued to stand there watching him as he watched me with his nostrils flaring.
“Why do I smell my cologne?”
With a red hue covering my pale skin tone, I cleared my throat. “How did it go at Limits? Get everything sorted out?”
Something flashed in the darkness of his eyes as they flicked over my body. “Are you unpacked?”
“No, we’re not doing that,” I said while stepping closer to the kitchen island so I could stand across from him.
It created a barrier between us.
“Do what?” Noah asked while leaning his long arms over the edge of it.
I did my best not to gawk at his muscles as they rippled and the way the tattoos just seemed to fit him.
“If we’re going to be married, you’re not going to hide anything from me. I grew up in this life, Noah. You don’t need to keep me away from it.”
A sly smile spread to his lips. “We are getting married, Scar. There’s no if.”
I rolled my eyes. “You know what I mean. I’m not asking to be a leader next to you but all I want is honesty.”
Those almond eyes watched me for another long beat before he gave a curt nod.
“Tonight went south; fast.”
I pulled out a stool to take a seat, resting my elbows on the counter. “Were you able to give Vincent’s sister any answers?”
“No,” Noah pinched his eyes shut with a sigh. “When I told her the only information I have is that someone in the Irish mafia killed him, she wouldn’t listen. She’s insistent that it’s the Italians.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
I leaned back into my seat and crossed my arms over my chest which made my breasts perk up over the top of my shirt; something Noah tracked intently with his eyes.
“The Italians haven't stepped foot in your or my territory in almost a decade. They know it would start a war,” I explained.
“You seem to know a lot,” he raised a brow, still standing across from me.
“While my father did his best to keep me out of it, my uncle constantly brought me into meetings. He wanted me to take over when they’re gone,” I said.
“Well, Vincent’s sister surprised all of us when she told us she had some Italian tied up in her trunk,” Noah grabbed water from the fridge, popping it open with an attractive ease.
My eyes doubled. “How did she manage that?”
“No fucking idea. This guy had no ties to the mob, nothing. So I had to pay him a lot of money to keep quiet,” Noah said with a grimace on his face.
“Where did the blood come from?” I pointed to his shirt.
That earned a slight chuckle from him. “Fucker had a nose bleed when I tried to scare him off. All over my good shirt.”
Noah’s words prompted him to slip into the laundry room off the kitchen and return with a basket full of his clothes. As he spread them out on the large counter, I watched in surprise when he began folding them.
“Is it the housekeepers' day off tomorrow?” I joked.
“No housekeeper. I do all the cleaning and cooking,” he informed me.
Well don’t I feel like a judgemental asshole.
Drumming my fingers along the marble, I motioned to the bedroom. “I’m going to head to bed, since we’ve got a busy day tomorrow.”
Noah paused the folding so he could gaze up at me through his long lashes.
“Noon at the courthouse. Are you fine with going out to Limits for a small celebration? The guys were adamant on it.”
I shrugged while hopping off the stool. “That’s fine, I guess. Gives me a reason to get all dolled up.
“I’m going to finish up the laundry then go into the shower. I promise I’ll be quiet,” Noah smiled.
My heart fluttered in my chest at the sight of it so all I did was nod before retreating down the long hallway towards the bedroom.
Even though it was a comfortable bed, I found it hard to sink into the black sheets because of the new place. Any time I slept away from home, it was a restless night. My brain couldn’t calm down and tell myself that I was safe. So I lay there with the forest green blanket pulled to my chin and eyes screwed shut hoping it would help the sleep take me.
Noah’s quiet footsteps echoed on the hardwood as he stalked inside of the bedroom. I watched as he disappeared into the closet and reemerged with a pair of pajama pants. The confidence that radiated off of him as he stepped inside the bathroom was one that made anyone envious. Due to the window that peered into the bathroom, I could see Noah beginning to strip out of his clothes, oh so slowly as if he knew I was watching him. He didn’t bother to turn on the bathroom light, the moonlight breaking through the windows casting him in an aura made for the Gods.
I sucked in a breath when he stepped into the large shower, his large back and perk ass on display for my eyes to drink in. The large Jesus portrait tattoo that lined the entirety of his back glistened as the water droplets fell down to the swell of his ass.
“A Thiarna cuidigh liom,” I groaned while dragging a hand down my face.
I was supposed to be upset with this arrangement and I probably would have been if my future groom wasn’t built the way Noah Sebastian was.
Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve had a huge crush on him since freshman year.
Grumbling at the voice in my head, I forced myself to face the other way in bed in an attempt to get some sleep. While floating in and out of consciousness, I swore I heard the softest melody emanating from the walls of the bedroom. It wrapped around me like a blanket, cradling me with endless comfort, and I felt every worry slip through my fingertips. The weight shifted slightly to pull me in closer but did nothing to disturb the comfort.
NOAH
My knee bounced with so much agitation, I feared it shook the entire penthouse. I sat in my computer chair with my fingers steepeled underneath my chin, memories of earlier replaying in my mind on a constant fucking loop.
The slight hesitation in the ballpoint of the pen before she signed her name on the marriage certificate.
I knew Scarlett wasn’t too fond of this arrangement but there was a part of me that wasn’t expecting the hesitation, especially after last night.
“Scar?” I asked, just above a whisper.
Her sleeping form held the pillow close to her chest but I frowned, not getting into bed yet. She was asleep in my spot. I chewed on my bottom lip, debating whether or not to wake her because I slept in that spot every single night for the last eight years of living in this penthouse.
But standing there at the end of my bed, watching the way her chest rose and fell with each deep breath and the soft snores emanating from her plump lips made everything I’d formally known change.
I slipped into bed behind her with every intention of lying opposite of her but almost immediately, her hand found my bicep in a soft embrace and I vowed not to move at all that night. It was a simple touch but enough to make my heart race.
It was foolish to think that it meant something. Scarlett didn’t feel the same, she’d made it clear that she was here against her will. The first chance she had, she would take it to run off with someone more qualified for her love. It didn’t matter for me to try because I’d never been worthy of Saiorse Scarlett McManus.
Saiorse Scarlett McManus-Sebastian.
I glanced down to my left hand, the black band a sight I was still getting used to. I wore rings all the time, just never on that finger. While she had been getting ready for tonight, I had Matt run to the best jewelry store in the Concrete Jungle to pick up the sets of rings I had put a rush order on. My ring wasn’t anything special, and to be honest neither was Scar’s. Due to the short time frame, I had to make due with what I could. A simple gold band with a small marquise diamond. I knew it wasn’t her style but for now, until I could get her something better later on, this would be fine.
The small velvet box weighed heavy in the pocket of my pants and I knew if I didn’t give it to her soon, it would burn a hole.
A soft knock at my office door pulled me from my thoughts and when I peered over the computer at who stood in the doorway, my heart felt heavy in my chest. Scar stood there with her hands behind her back, almost shy as I drank in her appearance.
Her red hair was pulled back into a tight bun, showcasing the sharpness of her cheekbones.
Her make up was minimal but dark enough to make her green iris shine bright.
The dress she wore managed to hug her figure perfectly. It was a deep olive color that stood out against the paleness of her freckles skin and cut low enough at her breasts that it didn’t leave too much to the imagination but somehow covered her modestly. My gaze traveled up the slit on the dress where her toned legs poked through.
“Noah?”
I snapped my eyes up to her face, a low hum rumbling in my chest. “Yea?”
“Is this alright?”
“Why wouldn’t it be?” I frowned.
Scar shrugged and in that moment, I could tell by the pain she held behind her smile that she was struggling with something internally.
“It’s stupid,” she sighed, ready to leave the room until I grabbed her hand.
“Hey,” my voice was soft. “Nothing you say is stupid, alright?”
Those emerald eyes bounced between mine. “With Cory, he didn’t like me wearing things like this.”
The ex.
“You can wear whatever you’re comfortable with,” I gave her hand a gentle squeeze, electricity shooting through my system before reluctantly dropping it.
Scar cleared her throat before rubbing her palms on the side of her silk dress and motioning to me. “Ready to go?”
I peered down to my black pants and plain black shirt, suddenly self conscious I wasn’t dressed up enough for her.
“I can change if it’s not-.”
“No!” She said quickly before catching herself. “You look good.”
A sly smirk came to my lips and with this sudden surge of confidence I pulled out the velvet box from my pocket and heard Scar suck in a breath. The prior nerves were back and I couldn’t stop the way my hands shook as I opened it.
“It’s not much,” I sighed. “Given I had less than twenty four hours to get you a ring, this was the best I could do.”
Scar didn’t say anything as her bright eyes watched me slip the ring on her left hand.
It may have been small but it fit her like a glove.
“It’s fine, Noah,” she reassured me with a quick smile. “I’m not into gaudy and unnecessarily huge rings.”
We stood there in the ever growing silence of my office, the roaring flames from the fireplace the only thing that eased my worries. The orange hues of the fire casted Scar in a golden halo, the sight of the angel in front of me enough to still my heart.
Angel.
“An-.”
“Noah!”
Both mine and Scar’s head snapped over to the hallway right outside the door to my office, seeing Matt standing there.
“Everything alright?” I asked, knowing the panicked look in his eyes.
They shifted to Scar’s where they lingered for a moment too long.
“Matt,” I called his name softly but with enough force; a warning.
“Sorry,” he shifted on his feet. “There’s an issue downstairs in the shop. A client that won’t leave.”
My shoulders fell with an exaggerated groan. “Can’t you handle it?
He rolled his eyes, almost insulted that I doubted his ability. “You know I have no problem with that but they’re not here for us.”
My brow peaked. “Then who are they here for?”
Matt’s eyes darted to Scar who pointed at herself, dumbfounded. “Me?”
“It’s your dad and Uncle. They’re here with some asshat named Cory, who is the one refusing to leave.”
The all too familiar feeling of anger and jealousy festered low in my gut at hearing not only where her father and uncle downstairs in my shop, but so was the asshole ex.
“What are they doing here?” I asked her, trying hard to keep my voice calm.
She shrugged. “I have no idea! I talked to my dad earlier and told him that the papers were signed. He said congratulations and he’ll send a gift at some point.”
Rubbing a hand on my jaw, I gave a curt nod urging Matt to lead the way. The heels of Sacr’s heels clicked against the marble floor as she followed behind me. The ride down the elevator was quiet, filled with my deep and even breathing. Through the corner of my eye, I noticed a few things.
Matt’s eyes darted over to Scar, lingering on the side of her face.
Scar played with the new ring on her finger while she muttered something to herself. Something plagued her mind, it was clear in the way her shoulders were slumped and something continued to twitch in her cheek.
“Did you want me to handle him?” I asked once the elevator stopped at my shop.
Her head tilted up to me, my question lingering in her mind. I found myself getting lost in the greens of her eyes, swimming in the pool of the gold specks in them.
“No. It’s probably better I do,” she sighed.
When the elevator doors opened revealing the closed tattoo shop, I extended an arm to let her walk ahead. We walked down the back hallway, passing my office, the gym, and bathrooms before the sight of all of the closed down booths appeared. On the other side of the front counter stood the McManus brothers and Cory, who was red in the face due to screaming about something.
“She was mine!”
“Calm down, son,” Conner McManus lit a cigarette, puffing out the smoke.
“You can’t smoke in here,” I said with a stern tone.
His dark eyes snapped over to me before tossing down the cigarette, crushing it beneath his boot.
“Cory, what are you doing here?” Scar asked after her father left a soft kiss to the side of her head in greeting.
“Your dad told me you’re married?”
I took a deep breath, trying to let Scar handle this on her own, but both Matt and I flanked behind her; just in case.
The McManus brothers shared a look before Conner threw a thumb over his shoulder. “He showed up at our place drunk rambling about wanting to see Saorise so we brought him here. He’s your problem now.”
“Congratulations on your nuptials. Let’s hope for a time of peace,” Murphy reminded, giving a small smile to his daughter.
With a nod, I dismissed them from my shop and soon it was Cory alone with the three of us.
“I told you I was to be married off,” Scar’s brows furrowed. “I called you earlier this week to tell you and your exact words were,"What do you want me to do about it?””
Cory chuckled darkly. “I thought you were fucking with me to get back at me for Tory.”
She flinched. “Tory? What does Tory have to do with anything?”
Cory held a bottle of vodka loosely between his fingers before bringing it to his lips, downing the rest of it in one go.
“Because I fucked her,” he replied while wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
I took a large step towards him, not being able to hold back my anger any longer, but Scar’s soft gasp halted me.
“Yo-You what?”
Cory snorted when he took in the look of hurt on her face. “I mean, it wasn’t anything serious. Just a good fuck, something to pass the time while you were in school.”
My hands shook at my sides, something Matt noticed because he rested a hand on my shoulder.
“She wants to handle it,” he uttered in my ear, reminding me.
I snapped my eyes over to him but it did nothing to deter the hand on my shoulder. The gun in the holster of my pants began to get heavy. I kept a hard gaze over Scar’s head, directly at Cory, who seemed unphased by the scene he was beginning to create.
“You fucked Tory?”
Scar’s voice and face were unreadable which caused me great panic. I wasn’t sure how she would react or if this news even bothered her. I knew they didn’t date long and according to my intel it didn’t seem to mean much. But even so, finding out you’ve been cheated on during your relationship hurts.
Cory snickered at the distressed look on Scar’s face. “You have no right to act like this, Saorise. You married another man.”
Her eyes flicked over to me but mine never left his face, watching him through the thin slits.
“I didn’t have a choice! My father and Uncle made me. If I did have a choice, I would have moved far away from here years ago,” she sneered.
My heart sank low and my shoulders fell slightly when I gazed down at her. Deep down, I knew she still wasn’t happy about our situation but to hear her continue repeating it cut deep. It was like I was in highschool all over again, fawning over the popular girl who didn’t bat an eye.
“I was going to marry you, Saorise. I had a ring picked out,” the bottle slipped from Cory’s fingers and clattered to the ground at our feet; the leftover alcohol splashing on my shoes.
I grumbled in displeasure.
“Was that before or after you fucked Tory?” Scar took a step towards him.
“Scar,” I warned.
“Scar? What the fuck kind of name is that? Her name is Saoirse,” Cory laid a hand on my shoulder, trying to push me.
Ultimately failing as I barely moved. My veins were filled with hurt from her constant reminders that she didn’t want to be married to me but now, I was filled with sheer anger.
“We call her Scar,” I informed him through gritted teeth.
Cory rolled his eyes. “You guys are all fucked up. I’ve heard the rumors about OMNS. You think you can keep Saoirse safe from that?”
Matt took a large step toward him but was halted with my hand to his chest, both of us sharing a look; one that we’ve shared many times before.
“Take Scar upstairs,” my voice was low and even.
Some would say it even scared them.
Matt gave a curt nod and gently grabbed her elbow but she ripped it from his grasp, those green eyes shooting daggers into me.
“Excuse me? What happened to me handling it?”
I ignored her, letting my stubborn side win, and motioned towards Cory all while keeping my hands in my pockets. “You can leave through the same door you stepped through.”
“Fuck you!” He spat, now pushing me in my chest with both hands, causing me to stumble slightly. “Saoirse is mine! You can’t just fucking take her because you signed some bullshit paper agreement with her father.”
My left brow raised. “Last time I checked, a marriage certificate isn’t a bull shit paper agreement.”
“Noah!” Scar stepped in front of me, blocking my path to Cory. “I told you I can handle this myself.”
“Then why is he still here? Did you invite him?” I asked, eyes flicking down to her and doing my best to keep my composure.
“Fuck off!” She stomped her foot, showing how angry she was getting.
I had to admit, it was kind of cute seeing her bratty side come out.
“You said it yourself you won’t dictate what I do in this marriage. I am my own person.”
The way she said marriage caused something to stir low in my gut and I knew it wasn’t anything good. That all too familiar feeling of my hands shaking in my pockets and my heart beat wildly in my chest usually ended in one way.
Death.
Matt knew this. He’d been by my side since the early days and he’d seen first hand what happened to the people that were on the receiving end of it.
“Alright, time to go,” Matt said before picking up Scar, tossing her over his shoulder.
“You mother fucker! Put me down!” She thrashed in his arm, her no match for his strength.
As her screams faded down the hall towards the elevator, I looked over my shoulder to call back to them.
“Keep it up, Scar. Matt has permission to smack that pretty little ass.”
They stood in the middle of the elevator, her still thrashing about on his shoulder, so Matt gave a wicked smirk with a wink just before the doors shut.
“It’s not even worth it, man. Her holes aren’t even that fuckable.”
My eye snapped back to Cory, who was slightly swaying on his feet, and now one hand rested behind my back to graze over the handle of my gun. My voice wavered only slightly, going undetected by the drunk man in front of me.
“What did you just say?”
He hiccuped, the vodka now settling in his bloodstream. “Her cunt isn’t that great. She just lies there like a board. You’re better off fucking a pillow.”
I swallowed thickly with a finger now on the trigger. All I could see was red.
Blood.
His blood staining the floor of the underground and hearing his pleas of sorrow as I dragged the knife across the flabby flesh of his throat.
“You should have come to me to talk about marrying her!” He poked a weak finger to my chest. “She’s mine.”
I blinked for a long moment, letting out an even longer deep breath in the exact exercises my therapist taught me. I couldn’t do anything up here due to the cameras I had littered throughout so instead, I cleared my throat while extending a hand behind me.
“We’ll, why don’t we step into my office to work out a deal,” I suggested with a playful smirk.
Cory smiled with triumph and straightened out his polo. “The only hole I want is her mouth. It’s all she’s good for.”
The knife hidden in my sock itched with the need to slice flesh.
SCAR
“You mother fucker!” I pounded on Matt’s broad back as we rode the elevator back up to the penthouse.
“Try all you want, Saoirse. But did you forget Noah’s warning?” He teased me.
My face was directly in sight with his round ass and with a playful smirk, I pinched it, causing him to yelp out and dropping me to my feet.
“Did you just pinch my ass?” He asked dumbfounded while rubbing the spot I pinched.
I shrugged. “It was right in front of my face. I can't help it if you've got a nice ass.”
His face flinched, not expecting my boldness. “Noah definitely has his hands full with you.”
Crossing my arms over my chest, I gave him my back to finish the ride up in silence. I could feel him behind me, eyes burning over my entire body, and my tough resolve began to slowly slip away. The day had gone straight to hell the second I woke up and found myself wrapped in Noah’s warm embrace. I spent an excruciating long moment tracing over the tattoos on his chest with my eyes, burning them into memory.
Ever since I watched him in the shower last night, I felt this undeniable burn between my legs that needed to be touched, licked, bite, and fucked. Not even the moment in the shower this afternoon while Noah was running a few errands before our courthouse appointment extinguished this burn.
When I cried out his name as my orgasm engulfed me, it made the flames burn higher.
“You seem on edge,” Matt’s deep voice pulled me from thoughts of Noah naked.
“I wonder why,” I grumbled under my breath.
He chuckled, the sound bringing an ease to the tension around us.
“Noah will be fine,” he assured me.
“He’s not the one I’m worried about,” I admitted while stepping off the elevator when it opened to the penthouse.
Turning on my heels, I noticed Matt still standing in the elevator, unmoving.
“Are you not going to come inside and watch me?” I teased.
His eyes raked over me from underneath his hat, a sly smirk playing on his lips.
“Tempting. But I’ve got other things to do.”
I didn’t have time to think of what that other thing was before the doors shut, leaving me alone in the large penthouse. I continued to grumble obscenities under my breath as I stalked towards the bedroom, ready to change into a pair of sweats and spending the rest of this awful day on the couch reading a book.
And not think of your husband’s ass in the shower.
Groaning at the little voice in my head, I threw on a pair of sweats, not bothering to take my makeup off, and dragged my feet down the long hallway again to the large bookshelves that were right next to the elevator. Noah had a large collection, might as well help myself to one or two.
Black fingernails skimmed over the spines of the large collection, humming a soft tune to myself, until one caught my eye.
A New World.
When I went to pull it out, excited to read my favorite book, it wouldn’t budge. Instead, the bookshelf began to creak and groan before slowly opening into the wall.
“No fucking way,” I scoffed. “He would have a secret door that leads to a dark staircase.”
I thought about it for a moment; go down the stairs to see where it led or play dumb to the fact that I ever saw it. But suddenly, something from yesterday popped in my brain.
“I took the back staircase.”
Noah made it a point to say that he takes this staircase when he’s unable to walk through the lobby of the penthouse. Meaning wherever his staircase led, it was meant to be hidden.
“Fuck it,” I muttered with a shrug before taking the stairs, one step at a time.
It was lit with a muted yellow glow so I had a hand on the wall to guide me in case I were to tumble down. With each tentative step, voices grew closer and closer until I heard what sounded like flesh on flesh and then pained cries.
When my footsteps halted at the bottom of the staircase, I felt my heart jump into my throat and stomach fall out of my ass with the sight in front of me.
“What the fuck!”
NOAH
“Wait please!”
Ignoring the pathetic cries falling from Cory’s mouth, I sunk the knife deeper into the already gaping wound in his thigh, twisting and turning it in all different directions. The sound of blood squelching brought a sinister smile to my face as I watched the sheer pain on his face. Tendrils of my dark hair fell into my eyes but I didn’t dare brush them away.
“You have a lot of nerve coming into my shop and talking about my wife that way,” I said.
Cory did his best to thrash in the chair he was tied up in but ultimately failed. “Fuck you!”
I cocked my head to the side, still having a tight grip on the knife in his thigh. I felt a presence behind me as I was crouched at the knees, knowing Matt was also watching with his own sinister smirk. I’d done a number on Cory already, his face barely recognizable from the blood that covered it and not only did he have a wound in his thigh, his arms and chest were littered with small yet painful slices from my blade.
“I’m done with him,” I said while slowly rising to full height, aged knees popping in and out of place.
Matt handed me a small handgun from one of my large collections and when I cocked it, Cory’s eyes went white as a ghost.
“Wait!” He choked on his own blood. “I have information!”
The grip on my gun never faltered but I did raise a brow at him. “What could you possibly know that would interest me?”
Deep, uneven breaths fell from Cory’s lips and I knew that I only had a short window with him before he succumbed to the wounds; more importantly, the one on his side. Matt made a comment of how deep I went with the knife but all I saw was red, Cory’s comments from earlier urging the knife deeper.
“The only hole I want is her mouth. It’s all she’s good for.”
“Its-,” he coughed up blood, spewing it all over himself and at the ground near my shoes. “About Saoirse’s mom. Her death.”
That made my gun falter a bit but I kept my tough resolve apparent. “Her mom died years ago. Why do you think I would spare your life when it was already a solved case?”
Underneath the blood that pooled from Corey’s mouth was a sinister smirk as he leaned his head back.
“That’s what they want you to think.”
Matt, who had slowly slipped behind Cory, and I shared a look before he asked the next question.
“Who’s they?” Matt wondered.
Cory did his best to shrug due to being tied up. “The ones who did it.”
I let out an agitated groan before dropping the gun onto the metal table next to me, the noise caused Cory to jump. It had been an extremely long day and the last thing I wanted to do was stand here while he ran us in circles with this so-called information. There were many things I would much rather be doing.
My wife.
Shaking the thought from my head, I stalked over towards the far end of the underground to where I held all of my variety of tools; immediately reaching for the pair of rusty pliers.
Twirling the tool in my hands, I noticed a look of fear flash in Cory’s eyes just before I flicked my own towards Matt, giving him a silent order. He wrenched Cory’s head back by the roots of his hair, keeping him in place, gloved fingers smearing his own blood all throughout.
It took me a lot longer than I’d like to admit to start wearing gloves during these kinds of meetings. Not only for the fear of leaving fingerprints behind but because blood was a bitch to wash off.
“Cory,” I clicked my tongue against my teeth. “I’m getting really fucking tired of your voice.”
He blinked, trying to fight against Matt’s grip on him. “Wh-what are you going to do?”
I sinisterly looked at the old pliers in my hand and shivered with delight. “I’m going to rip out your tongue.”
Screams of pain echoed loudly in the underground, but never making past the concrete walls, as I yanked his tongue out of his mouth. Cory writhed in the chair as his words were muffled as I nearly clipped the pliers with his tongue.
“One last question,” I said without an ounce of waver in my voice. “Does Vincent’s death have anything to do with Mrs. McManus’ death?”
The pupils of Cory’s eyes bled black and even with both mine and Matt’s grip on him, I felt the softest of nods. Something inside of me burned low with the revelation that my best friend was possibly killed by the same person that killed Scar’s mom.
“This is for everything you said about my wife.”
With the pliers clamped around Cory’s tongue, I ripped it with such force, blood spattered across my shirt, down to my shoes. His cries sounded like pure bliss to my ears as I let the limp muscle and pliers clatter to the dirty ground at my feet.
Matt pushed himself away from Cory, wiping his hands on the back of his sweats, before tossing me a rag.
“You got some blood on your face,” he pointed to his cheek.
With a disgusted groan, I wiped the blood away and ripped away the destroyed shirt now. It would have to join the burn pile. As I discarded my gloves into the same pile, I continued to ignore the mess of a man in front of me. Blood pooled down Cory’s chin and over his bare chest. But the satisfaction I thought I would feel after causing him this much pain was non-existent. I wanted him to suffer for everything he said about Scar but mostly the fact he had the nerve to cheat on her.
Matt immediately noticed the look in my eyes, having seen it one too many times before.
“Noah, let’s end this. It’s not like he’s physically able to tell us anything else,” he suggested.
I scratched at the tattoos on my chest absentmindedly, doing my best to calm the beast inside of me. I was alway calm with dealings like this, the more level headed one of our group. But Cory’s words about my wife continued to tease me and I couldn’t contain myself any longer. Rage consumed me as I laid fist after fist into Cory’s flesh; anywhere I could.
His stomach.
His chest.
His face, over and over again.
It was as if the rage had blinded my vision, making the only thing I could see was pure darkness. His muffled groans and the sound of flesh on flesh was muted by the pounding of my heart in my ears.
“What the fuck!”
Chest heaving, I whirled around on my heels to see Scar standing on the far end of the room where the hidden staircase led. The soft features of her face were contorted with agony as she took in the sight in front of her.
Cory’s near lifeless body at my feet, still tied to the chair.
Matt sat on the metal table, dangling his legs in the air, as he browsed something on his phone.
And me, standing above the mess I created with blood on my hands; literally. Scar’s lips were parted, the softest off breaths falling from them, and her pupils were dilated with sheer fear.
No.
Not fear.
Arousal.
“Cory!” Scar bellowed before taking a step towards him, causing me to block her path.
“Now you care for him?” I sneered, wiping his blood over my chest.
“N-no,” she stammered while shifting on her feet. “I just-. I didn’t expect to see this when I came down here!”
Matt snorted from his spot on the table. “What did you expect to see, Scar? Us having a picnic?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “Fuck off, Matthew.”
“It’s Matt,” I corrected. “You need to go back upstairs.”
Now her fury was directed towards me and she poked a nail into my bare chest, doing her best not to gawk at the tattoos and blood.
Ultimately failing.
“You don’t tell me what to do, Noah!” She poked me again. “You brought me into this fucked up world, the least you can do is let me see it!”
I cocked my head to the side, slowly licking my lips, and took a tentative step towards her. The chill of the underground brought goosebumps to my skin but the reminder of how her finger felt poking my skin bathed me in warmth.
“Does this turn you on, Scar?” I teased with a low voice.
There was a slight hesitation before she scoffed, locking her hands on her hips. “No!”
Her voice was high pitched, almost scratchy, and it was something I remembered from highschool she would do this exact thing when she was lying. I raised a finger to her, twirling a piece of auburn hair around it.
“Admit it, Scar. Even you’ve thought about it. Dragging your knife across someone’s flesh. Their screams of despair and pain bring a sense of comfort, maybe even arousal,” I breathed into the crook of her neck.
She swallowed thickly and I tracked the way her bottom lip caught between her teeth, desperately wanting to know how they tasted.
“You’re sick!” her eyes snapped up towards mine.
I grinned, dark tendrils of hair falling into my even darker eyes. “If I’m so sick, then how come your hand is reaching for my belt?”
Scar cursed when she realized her fingers were brushing against the buckle of my belt and hurriedly jumped away from me. Her eyes darted back to the scene behind me, lingering on the slowly dying body at my feet.
“Did you rip out his tongue?!” She gasped, covering her mouth.
I kicked the limp muscle on the other side of the room carelessly. “Bastard kept talking about you. I needed to teach him a lesson.”
Matt slipped off of the table and reached for one of the smaller pocket knives we had hanging on the wall behind him. Twirling it between his fingers, he nodded towards Scar.
“Do you want to finish him off? A little payback for him cheating on you?”
For the briefest of moments, she thought about it with the way her gaze lingered on the sharp blade before falling down to Cory, who had passed out from the pain. Scar was facing an internal battle inside of her between what was right and wrong. Well, what she thought was wrong. Nothing I did in the undergrounds of the Concrete Jungle was wrong. I did it to protect what I’ve created here and to protect the ones I love.
“What do you say? Or are you too much of a pussy to get the job done?” I taunted, hands buried deep into the pockets of my dress slacks.
Scar’s lips recoiled as she violently shook her head. “If I would have known you were like this, I wouldn’t have agreed to this marriage!”
My heart sank to the depths of my stomach but I continued to hold my demeanor, not allowing her to know how her words continued to affect me.
“Fine,” I shrugged with a sigh. “You have two choices. Stay here and watch or go upstairs and wait for me.”
“Wait for you? For what?” She blinked.
Not uttering a word, I turned on my heels back towards Cory and kicked his abdomen, waking him from his slumber. Words were muffled as he tried to fight against the binds, weakly due to the blood loss, so Matt bent at the knees next to him.
“We’ll make it quick,” he shook the knife in front of Cory’s face, whose eyes flared with fear.
I didn’t have to see if Scar went upstairs, I could feel her presence behind me as she stalked closer. The ghost brush of a hand on my lower back made my spine stiffen and when I glanced over my shoulder, I raised a brow at her.
“Curious cat, eh?”
“Fuck off, Sebastain!” She pushed away from me and I could hear her footsteps amcking against the concrete as she ran up the hidden staircase.
“Did you want the honors, boss?” Matt’s voice caused me to turn my head back towards him.
“He’s all yours,” I said, the urge to hurt him not present. “Have Ash help you clean up. But once you’re finished, do me a favor and look into what he was rambling on about earlier.”
Matt gave a quick two finger salute. My heart was no longer in this game of torture and mutalation. It was vying for the woman upstairs and wanting to make things right with her. The usual sick thrill I got from watching a kill meant nothing as I followed Scar’s footsteps.
SCAR
I lay in bed with my back turned towards the door, trying my darndest to erase the image of Cory on the flood from my brain. While I never loved him, it still struck something inside of me to see him so broken on death's door. Yet, the way Noah looked towered over him, shirtless and the blue lights of the underground emanating him in neon glows now made something burn inside. My pussy ached as I remembered how the blood looked smeared across Noah’s tattooed chest and for the quickest of moments, I wanted to lick it off of him.
“You’re so fucked up!” I groaned while pressing my palms into my eyes, hoping to rub away the vision from my mind.
“Talking to yourself?”
Snapping my eyes open, I saw Noah leaning against the doorframe of the bedroom, thick arms crossed over his chest. He looked like a dream with the setting sun's rays blasting through the large windows and casting him in a peachy glow. His belt and button were undone, showcasing the hard V line of his hips as his pants hung low, and I found myself staring at the few dark hairs that peaked out from the waistband of his briefs.
“If you want it, Scar. All you need to do is ask,” Noah teased while pushing himself off the door frame and stalked into the bedroom.
Rolling my eyes, I sat up in bed and pulled my knees to my chest as I watched him walk towards the bathroom.
“Did you kill him?”
My words made Noah pause, the muscles in his back flexing, but he didn’t look towards me. “Will you cry if I tell you the truth?”
“I don’t love him. Never had. But that doesn't mean he deserved to die, Noah!”
Now he whirled around on his feet, dark eyes staring daggers into me.
“He cheated on you, Scar! Bragged about how the only good hole you had was your mouth. Claimed you would lie there stiff as a board,” Noah ran a hand through his hair.
I pulled my lips in a tight light after I was about to say something but when he took a large step towards me, I realized he wasn't done yet.
“Did you really think I would let him get away with talking about you like that? My wife. In my shop?!”
His eyes were wild as he loomed over me in the bed and my stomach flipped at his words.
My wife.
“I-,” my voice faltered, unsure what to say.
Noah’s nostrils flared, his anger radiating off of him in droves, and he leaned farther over me causing my body to fall to the bed. Tattooed arms locked me in on both sides of my head and I felt his scorching breath fanning over my lips. We were so close that if I titled my head up just a tad, I would finally be able to figure out what he tasted like; a thought that had been plaguing my mind since highschool.
“Let’s make one thing clear here. You’re mine, angel. Anyone who disrespects you will pay a price, regardless of who they are,” Noah pressed his hips against mine.
I sucked in a breath when his cock brushed along my pussy, over the silk fabric of my pajama shorts. I’d change once I came back upstairs, ready for the day to be over, not caring it was just before six in the evening. My hands shook at my sides, unsure what to do with them, so Noah grabbed them and pinned both of them above my head; both wrists fitting in one of his hands.
“Wh-what did you call me?” I choked out, suddenly realizing what he said.
His nose brushed along my jawline, breathing me in.
“Angel,” Noah almost purred.
I swallowed thickly, doing my best to keep my strong hold against him even though it was faltering with every brush of his cock against me. He was slowly dry humping me and I was giving back to him with even strokes. There was still dried blood across the tattoos on his chest, painting them in crimson, and I could still smell the lingering copper scent.
“What if I don’t like it?” I panted, nearly gone in bliss.
He groaned while grazing his teeth along my jugular. “Too bad because it stays. Angel.”
With one of his hands still keeping mine locked about my head, his other slipped underneath my nightshirt to graze over my blazed skin. We were like a couple of horny teenagers that found their first moment alone with each other with how frenzied our movements were against each other. My orgasm was building slowly, the familiar tingling sensation in the base of my spine. It was so close, I could taste it on the tip of my tongue and I wanted nothing more than to scream out his name as I came undone underneath hNoah.
“How wet are you, angel?” He flicked his tongue against my earlobe. “I bet you're soaked just from this.”
I nodded, too far gone now to try and fight against him. I needed this release more than oxygen and it was almost as if Noah understood because his hand slipped between us to tease my folds over my shorts.
“I fucking knew it,” he chuckled darkly. “How bad do you want my cock, Scar?”
I bit the inside of my cheek, not wanting to give away how bad I actually wanted or how I’ve wanted it since freshman year. Instead I raised my hips up towards his hands, a silent beg falling from my lips.
“Use your words,” Noah demanded before smacking my pussy.
“Shit!” I cried out. “Fuck you.”
He wrapped one of my legs around his back so he could press his clothed cock over my core at a different angle and it was everything I needed for the coil to snap.
“Oh god,” my body convulsed underneath Noah as I let my orgasm overcome all of my senses.
White hazy stars danced at the edges of my vision.
I could taste the blood from Noah’s chest as I lapped at it, unknowingly.
All the noises around me seemed to fade away. The only thing I could hear was Noah’s grunts as he continued to dry fuck me.
At some point he let go of my hands and my nails scratched at the large Jesus portrait against Noah’s back, working myself through the aftershocks.
The scent of his cologne hung along the edge of my nose as I breathed him in.
“That’s such a good girl, Scar. You sound so pretty when you cum,” Noah praised while dragging his teeth along the side of my neck.
My jaw fell slack when I finally came down from my high and Noah began rising the hem of my shirt up over my stomach.
“You can lie all you want, Scar. But what you saw downstairs turned you on,” he flicked his eyes up at me from his new position over my belly.
“You’re crazy,” I breathed, letting my eyes flutter shut.
“For you-.”
“Am I interrupting something?”
My head snapped over towards the doorway where I saw one of his men leaning against the same spot Noah had been minutes prior. I vaguely recognized him as one of the members of OMNS; his long hair down past his shoulders and the cross earring hanging from his ear. The accent immediately told me who it was. I tried to scurry away from Noah, only for him to hold onto my hips with a vice grip, him sitting up against the back of his calves.
“Need something Joakim?” Noah made no effort to fix his pants or briefs as they were askew. I didn’t miss the agitation in his voice.
Joakim's eyes lingered at us for a moment before he motioned towards me. “Her fathers estate has been calling the lobby of the apartments. Apparently, her uncle wants to have her over for dinner tonight to celebrate the nuptials.”
Both Noah and I shared a look, knowing that it couldn’t be true because we saw my dad and uncle a few hours ago and neither of them made it known they wanted dinner tonight. Plus, if they did, they would call my cell phone, not the lobby.
Smacking his leg, Noah reluctantly rolled off of me allowing me to sit up and fix my hair and hopefully cool down my heated cheeks. I wasn’t sure how long Joakim had been watching us but from the sly smirk on his lips, I had a feeling it was before my orgasm.
“I don’t have a good feeling about this, Scar,” Noah sat on the edge of the bed, hair a disheveled mess and pants still unbuttoned.
While I expected to see his cock thick and hard, it nearly shocked me to see a faint wet spot staining the gray briefs; not from my arousal.
“I’ll be fine. Maybe it was a last minute dinner he wanted to set up. I’m sure he’s curious about the Cory situation,” I said.
Noah’s brows peaked. “What are you going to tell him?”
I shrugged. “It was handled. They don’t need to know the details.”
“Let me come with you. Since it is a dinner to celebrate us,” he spoke while rising from the bed, however Joakim shook his head.
“You’re needed at the M.I.N.D Clinic. Something happened with one of our extended guests.”
Noah sighed with even more agitation than before and pinched his eyes shut. “Fine. Let me clean up and I’ll meet you in the living room in ten minutes.”
“Wiat!” I grabbed his arm before he could retreat into the bathroom. “The M.I.N.D Clinic is real?”
“Yes,” his lips pulled down at my surprise. “It’s been a running establishment for the last three years. How have you not known about it?”
I shrugged. “There were rumors in my neighborhood about what you do in the Concrete Jungle but none of us knew for sure. The M.I.N.D Clinic allows you to go through your memories, right? Relieve them?”
Noah nodded but then his eyes widened when he realized what I was getting at and firmly shook his head. “Absolutely not, Scar. It can be a dangerous place there. We’ve had a resident with us for the last 118 days because he’s trying to remember his wife who is currently on her deathbed. The M.I.N.D program, while it is one I’ve programmed myself, still has its flaws. If you find yourself too deep, you won’t be able to pull yourself out.”
“But-!”
“No, Saoirse. Do not ask again,” Noah snapped, using my first name to let me know he meant what he said.
Holding up my hands, I nodded. “Fine. I’m going to change and head to my dad’s. I’ll be back later.”
“Take Joakim with you,” Noah said as I walked away from him. “I’ll bring Nicholas with me.”
Joakim nodded towards him but gave me a playful wink as I walked past him towards the walk in closet. “No offense, Joakim. But I can take care of myself. It’s just a dinner, no need for protection.”
Waving off Noah’s protests, I closed myself inside of the closet to get ready.
Thirty minutes later, I was dressed in a pair of jeans and a hoodie, not bothering to get dressed up for this last minute dinner, and drove down the familiar but darkened roads back to my fathers estate. I tried calling him once I got in the car to confirm but got his voicemail after three rings. Even though I knew it was nothing, I couldn’t ignore the way my heart beat increased the closer I got, something not sitting well with me. I couldn’t even enjoy the earlier thought of me coming apart for Noah without the fear of what I was about to walk into looming.
How could I allow myself to let Noah take that part of me? I had told myself over and over again before moving in that I would not fold that fast for him, yet there I was begging for his cock like a horny teeneager.
I mean, you were horny. You did love what you saw in the underground.
Grumbling at my thoughts, I took the familiar turn around the bend, my old neighborhood less than a mile away. Yet I was blinded when a pair of bright headlights came barreling towards me.
“Shit!” I cursed before wrenching the steering wheel to the side, causing my car to skid close to the edge.
Right in perfect sight of the car that t boned into me. All I could remember was the sound of metal on metal and glass breaking before being plunged into darkness.
JOAKIM
“Did she make it?” I asked Noah who had stepped inside of his office at the M.I.N.D Clinic.
While he was busy tending to the resident and his wife, I’d been sitting at his desk, looking over the numbers in the books. We had made a decent increase in revenue the last six months, along with a lot of our other businesses. We no longer had to worry about where money was coming from to cover the expenses of the underground, yet it was still nice to be aware of where the money was going.
Noah shook his head and stuffed his hands deep into the pockets of his black jacket. His black turtle neck had been pulled up high, covering the snake tattoo on his neck.
“She didn’t make it. He claims he kept having visions of her dying over and over again while he was under,” Noah fell into the chair across from the desk with a deep sigh.
“What happens now?” I wondered while leaning farther back into my own chair.
“He paid out for 150 days, he’s going to honor the rest of his contract. To be honest, I don’t think we’d be able to make him leave,” he ran a hand through his locks, brushing them away from his face.
We sat in silence for a moment until his deep voice reverberated in the air.
“How much of that did you see? Back at the penthouse?”
I gazed away from the computer screen to see a faint redness creeping along Noah’s defined cheekbones and snickered.
“Enough to know why Scar has been on your mind since highschool,” I clicked off the program before shutting down the computer.
Noah ran a hand over his face. “I didn’t expect to fall into her so quickly, Jolly. She has this way of pulling me in and I’m so afraid that I’ll fall even harder than the last time when she realizes I’m not what she wants.”
I kicked my feet up on the desk, ignoring the way Noah glared at the action.
“She doesn't have a choice, Noah. As long as both sides want to keep the peace and stop a war from breaking out, she has to remain married to you.”
I could tell my words did nothing to ease the anxiety in his mind so I continued. “Plus from what I saw and heard, she’s into you more than you think.”
Noah’s lips parted to speak but was interrupted by the constant shrill of his phone ringing and he dug it out of his pants pocket.
“It’s Scar,” he muttered before answering. “Hey, did you make it-.”
It was silent for an eerily amount of time and with the way his face changed from neutral to fear to pure anger made me sit straight up in the chair now.
“Where are you?” Noah made a simple motion with his hand, one I understood, and quickly I made my way over to the other end of the office, yanking one of the books off of the book shelf.
The shelf next to me creaked open from the middle, showcasing a large array of different kinds of weapons. After I grabbed one of the handguns, making sure it was loaded, I grabbed one of Noah’s favorites and tossed it to him. He caught it without even looking, still on the phone with Scar.
“It’s alright, angel. Joakim and I can be there in ten minutes. Have you called the cops?”
Angel?
Cops?
What the fuck was going on?
“Don’t. I’ll call the guys to meet you there. Folio can get there in five with his bike. Just stay out of sight, alright?” Noah said while grabbing another gun, giving me a sideways glance.
You can never be too safe.
Once he hung up, he worked out a text message, no doubt to our group chat, and then slipped on his leather gloves.
“Is she alright?” I asked as we made our way through the hidden door of the office that led to the back alley.
“I don’t know,” he spat out through gritted teeth.
Neither of us said a word as we slipped inside of the sleek black car, Noah speeding off before I even buckled my seat belt.
SCAR
The sound of metal scraping along the concrete was loud in my ears as I stood frozen, gazing at the sight in front of me. In an instant, everything changed and I couldn't stop wondering what would have happened if I didn't make it out.
If I was at the bottom of the ocean with what was left of the crumpled piece of metal. The face behind the mask was the last thing I saw before swerving my car out of the way and tumbling over the edge.
I let out a choked sob as the tears finally fell from my eyes and I didn't bother to wipe them away. Fear etched its way deep into my bones and my body shook uncontrollably. Until a faint shadow in the darkness appeared through the fog and the fear stilled, only for a moment.
"I-I-I'm sorry," I sobbed, cradling my arms to my chest, hoping to hide the injuries from him. "I didn't know who else to call."
Noah stepped out of the thick fog and immediately cradled my face, eyes scanning for every visible injury he could see.
“Are you alright, angel?”
The tenderness in his voice did nothing to ease away the pain weighing my body down. I shook my head, tears still falling.
“I should have called someone else. I know you’re busy and you wanted me to be with a guard but I didn’t want to be a bother,” I rambled on.
Noah’s thumb grazed over a deep wound on my cheek, gathering up the blood. “You always call me, Scar. Always.”
I blinked through the tears but eventually nodded.
“The car came out of nowhere! The only thing I could see was a masked person driving before it crashed into me,” I sobbed but then pointed a shaking finger towards the cliff edge twenty feet from us. “My car hung on the ledge for a few minutes and I climbed my way out, barely making it out before it fell into the water.”
Noah’s grip on my face tightened before he pulled me into his chest, large hands leaving soothing circles against my back as I cried.
“It’s alright, angel. I’ve got you. You’re alright,” he cooed.
“Everything hurts. I think my arm is broken,” I continued to sob. “I should go to a hospital.”
“No,” he pulled away from me slightly so he could glance down at me through the darkness, only illuminated by the lights from his car. “Hospitals will ask questions. I’ve got a doctor on call that will meet us back at the penthouse to look at that arm and stitch up your wounds.”
Suddenly exhausted from the aftermath of the crash, I numbly nodded before collapsing into his arms. Noah cursed before picking me up bridal style to carry me over to Nicholas’ SUV. He arrived seconds after Noah did.
“How is she?” Nicholas wondered while Noah laid me down in the back seat.
“We need to get her back to the penthouse, now. Have the doctor meet you guys there. I’m going to see what I can find,” Noah ordered.
I reached for his hand, keeping him from leaving. He stood in the open doorway of the car and peered down at me with concern in his almond eyes.
“Please don’t leave,” my voice shook.
While I did grow up in the mob life, I never was exposed to it in this kind of magnitude. There wasn’t a doubt in any of our minds that this whole night had been a hit on me or Noah. But we weren't sure who had set it up.
His clenched jaw eased before letting out a tender breath. “I need to figure out what happened. I won’t be long.”
“Folio is already looking,” I explained while slowly sitting up, grimacing at the pain that shot through me.
Just then, Folio popped up behind Noah, a cigar hanging loosely from his lips.
“What did you find out?” He whirled around, fanning out the smoke.
“The driver,” Folio adjusted his leather cut off. “Put up a nasty fight at first, damn near scratched my eyes out.”
At the mention of the scuffle, I did notice three red marks down the side of his face and over the Jesus tattoo on the side of his neck.
“So is he dead or alive?” Noah asked, aggravated.
I could tell in the way his shoulders tensed underneath his jacket that he was ready to take care of this by himself.
Folio smirked before pulling the cigar from his mouth. “She is alive. Got her in the trunk of your car.”
Very quickly, Noah barked out orders to all of his men before they all piled into their respective cars. He motioned for me to lay down again, resting my head in his lap as Nicholas drove us away from the scene. I could hear the rumble of Folio’s bike next to us while Joakim and Matt rode in Noah’s car that had the culprit tied up in the trunk. I knew that there were other cars behind us but I couldn’t care at that moment because Noah’s fingers worked through the blood matted knots of my hair.
“We’ll get you cleaned up and looked at. I’m going to have a conversation with this driver,” he muttered, keeping his eyes locked on the car in front of him.
“I want to be the one to do it.”
Noah’s eyes fell down to mine, heavy with exhaustion, but I forced them open.
“Are you sure?” He asked.
It nearly took me off guard that he didn’t argue with me but I recovered quickly.
“She nearly killed me, Noah,” I squeezed his knee, adjusting myself so I could take a small nap. “I’m going to find out why.”
SCAR
I stood in front of the woman who lay slumped in front of me, her words replaying in my mind over and over again. None of it could be true. There was no way; not possible.
We all arrived to the penthouse about an hour ago and while Noah brought me upstairs to get checked out and cleaned up, the rest of OMNS were busy dealing with her. I had a broken arm that was currently being held up by a sling and a wound on my forehead that needed to be stitched up, covered with a bandage. Besides those and a few bumps and bruises, I would live; much to the dismay of the woman at my feet.
It wasn't easy for me to shower by myself but I made due, not wanting Noah’s help. Even with our moment earlier this evening in bed, I wasn’t ready for him to see me naked yet.
The doctor prescribed me some meds for the pain but I declined, never liking the idea of pain meds after seeing my friends in high school abuse their parents. I’d gladly suffer for a few weeks rather than get addicted. As soon as I was dressed in a pair of leggings and a tank top, I had Noah help me back into the sling before both of us took the hidden staircase down to the underground where my prey sat waiting for me.
Nicholas and Folio had already roughed her up a bit for me and I couldn’t ignore the way it brought a giddy smile to my face seeing the woman a bloody mess. When she saw both Noah and I descended the stairs, pure ice cold fear filled her pupils and began rambling off nonsense.
Nonsense about my mother.
Once we arrived, Noah dismissed Nicholas and Folio, leaving just us three alone.
"Pl-please," she blabbered while spitting out blood. "You have to believe me! I saw it!"
“That’s not possible. She’s been dead for years. You saw her doppelganger or some shit,” I sneered while kicking her in her face, watching her rear back against the chilled concrete floor.
Thankfully I remembered to slip on my black boots before coming down here.
“I know what I saw! She was seen with Vincent!” The woman continued to spew bullshit.
According to Nicholas, he found out some details about this woman. She worked for the Italians and was set out to veer my car off of the road because they were upset that the deal for my hand in marriage was made with Noah and not one of their prospective sons.
As if I would ever get in bed with the Italians.
“You’re saying whatever you can think of to prolong you walking out of here alive,” I rolled my eyes before reaching for the knife that Noah had laid out prior to us coming down here.
I told him that I wanted to be the one to integrate her, he could hang back and watch in case things got out of hand. But before we came down here, he showed me how to properly use a knife.
“Keep a light grip on the handle but firm with the blade against their skin,” he breathed against the back of my neck as he stood behind me in our bedroom.
He held the blade against the sensitive skin of my neck and I held my breath, not due to fear but arousal. The scene also had an effect on him because I could feel Noah’s cock against the swell of my ass.
“It’s all true! Two weeks before Vincent showed up on OMNS doorstep, I saw him with your mother! At some sleazy German bar, they wanted to meet on neutral ground to discuss something.”
I paused twirling the knife in my hand and watched as the woman rose to her knees, holding out her hands.
“Discuss what?” I questioned, absitmindly playing with my wedding ring.
I couldn’t believe that it was still the same day that Noah and I signed the marriage certificate. It felt like days ago.
The woman hesitated before wiping the blood away from her broken nose with the back of her hand. “I don’t exactly know.”
Sighing, I yanked her head back by her hair, exposing her neck to the neon lights adorning the ceiling. I had no plans on killing her, that wasn’t me. Yet again, this whole torturing of a victim wasn’t me either, but given the circumstances I allowed myself this.
But realizing I could only hold her head back with my good arm, unable to hold the knife against her throat, I groaned before pushing her down the ground again.
My eyes snapped over to Noah leaning against the concrete wall, the bottom half of his face covered in the black mask. Dark tendrils of hair fell into his face but his hands were covered in blood so he refused to push them away.
“I’m suddenly bored. There’s no need to question you any longer. Have fun with her, Noah. I’m going to bed,” I grumbled, slamming the knife on the table as I walked past him, who still hadn’t uttered a word or moved a muscle.
“Noah looked into your mothers death! He sent Matt to find out more information,” the woman called after me, halting my footsteps. “It’s all over the Concrete Jungle that your mother was seen with Vincent. In more ways than one, if you catch my drift.
My head snapped over to Noah, ignoring the suddenly sinister laugh falling from the woman's mouth.
"Is it true?" I asked him, venom in my voice.
All he did was blink once but that was answer enough.
Yes.
I scoffed. “Were you planning on telling me?”
One blink.
Yes.
I pointed to the woman. “Does she have anything to do with my mother?”
This time, Noah didn’t blink which again told me his answer.
He didn’t know.
The woman watched the interaction between Noah and I, shaking her head wildly. "You can't believe him! He's lying!"
I cocked my head at her with narrowed eyes. There was a large and warm presence behind me. When I glanced over my shoulder, Noah was now standing behind me; physically and metaphorically.
"Noah's my husband. He has no reason to,” I said.
The woman's face was covered in blood, her right eye swollen shut but I wasn’t sure if it was from our beatings or from the car accident she caused. But I could see the briefest hint of fear in them when my fingers grazed over the handle of the gun Noah extended towards me.
"No, you're not like him. Please!” She begged while wrapping her arms around my hips, holding onto me.
The part of me that didn’t like the dark side of the mob life called to me, overpowering the thrill of seeing her weep at my feet and gently, I removed her grasp around me.
“I’m done,” I spoke flatly, pushing her away from me.
Mentally, I was exhausted from the everlasting day and was ready to call it a night when dark laughter pulled me back to the pathetic excuse of a woman.
“Your mother was right. You never could hack it in this business. I’m shocked your father signed you over to Noah Sebastian. He needs someone that can get their hands dirty. Maybe he’d be better off with me-.”
It all happened so quickly, barely having time to actually register what happened until it was too late. Me scurrying back over towards Noah, who still held the gun outstretched and my finger on the trigger, firing off two rounds directly into the woman's skull; right between the eyes.
The ringing in my ear due to the gunshot was deafening as I stood there motionless, unable to process any coherent thought or word. It wasn’t until I felt callused fingers around my wrist, pulling my attention away from the dead body at my feet and to the dark eyes of Matt, filled with concern.
“Let’s get you upstairs, Scar,” he gingerly led me back towards the hidden staircase, too far gone in a state of shock to realize Noah had begun cleaning up my mess.
NOAH
“Scar?” I called out into the dark penthouse.
After I finished cleaning up the mess in the underground thanks to help from Ash and Bryan, I made my way upstairs to check on Scar. Matt had taken her upstairs over an hour ago but I hadn’t heard how she was doing. It’s never easy, your first kill, so I knew the feeling of disgust and dread she had to have been feeling.
As I walked down the long hallway towards our bedroom, ignoring the one room that always remained locked, I paused momentarily just past the doorway of the bedroom when I heard soft cries echoing from the shower.
“Scar?” I called out again, this time with more fever as I ran into the bathroom, the sight stalling my heart.
She was curled up in a ball, still in her clothes and sling, soaked to the bone as she cried out. There was a frigid chill in the air, indicating she’d run through all of the hot water, but that didn’t stop me from kicking off my boots and stepping into the shower with her; clothes and all.
“Noah!” She cried, immediately pulling me into her, burying her face in my soaked black shirt.
“Shh,” I brushed my lips across her forehead, the bandage covering her stitches barely hanging on. “I’ve got you.”
“Am I?” Scar choked out, fisting at the fabric. “Am I a monster now?”
My heart shattered, pieces falling into the depths of my abdomen but I shook my head. Cupping her cheek, I forced her to look up at me, water droplets hanging onto her long lashes.
“No, angel. You’re a fighter. You did what needed to be done,” I held her closer to me, allowing her to cry out the guilt and anguish she felt.
She might have felt like a monster right now but I knew that she would evolve into something greater, far exceeding the expectations her family set against her. They were right when they thought she couldn’t run the McManus empire. Because she was made to run OMNS with me by her side.
First things first, however, we needed to have a talk with Matt and figure out what he found out about her mother's death.
#noah sebastian#bad omens#noah sebastian x ofc#mafiaboss!noah sebastian#tattooartist!noah sebastian#the coyotes cry noah sebastian#noah sebastian fan fictions
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Dark & Sexy Update (Smut Only)
Note: All characters are above 18 years of age. Minors DNI!
Here are the mini-series I have been working on for you guys:
The Slave
Thomas Shelby purchases a young virgin for his perusal as a sex slave at Arrow House.
Warning: Non-Con, Dub-Con, Rough & Dominant Tommy, Virginity Loss
The Basement
Cillian Murphy meets a young fan of his and offers her the opportunity to stay with him for a duration two weeks. She signs an NDA and Contract by which she agrees to be chained up in his basement for his perusal.
Warning: Naive Reader, CNC, Dom!Cillian
Teach Me, Daddy!
Cillian Murphy is the reader's stepfather and teaches her a thing or two about intimacy.
Warning: Daddy Kink, DDLG Talk, Highly Inappropriate Relationship
The Unwilling Wife
Thomas Shelby has always been obsessed with the reader and finally marries her after threatening her family.
Warning: Very Dark Tommy, Full On Non-Con, Loss of Virginity
My usual tag list has been disabled for this, but if you want to tagged in these fics, please comment here. You will then be included in a separate "Dark Fic" Taglist.
I am also open to other ideas and requests... or specific ideas of what these characters could do to the reader...
#cillian murphy#cillian murphy smut#tommy shelby#cillian murphy x y/n#peaky blinders#cillian murphy x you#cillian murphy imagine#tommy shelby smut#tommy shelby x reader#cillian murphy x reader
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Hello dear!!! I hope you're having a wonderful day!
Could you please write a piece about Cillian falling for a (younger!) poet? He starts frequenting her reading sessions and that's how they meet. The rest is up to you!
Thank you 🩵
Yes!! Love this, thank you <3
Enjoy my sweet nonny!
This is heavily inspired by the song All Too Well (10-minute version) (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift!!
Wind In My Hair, I Was There || Cillian Murphy x Reader
warnings: Smut, angst, age gap (reader is in her mid to late twenties, Cillian is in his forties.), swearing, Cillian is sort of an asshole in this in some parts, so that is a warning, infidelity (Cillian is married), general adult content ahead!!
Minors DNI! 18+
I'd also like to clarify this isn't really based on the real Cillian!! I know he's married and very happy, this is just fiction and fantasy!! Not meant to portray Cillian as a bad person!! I'd also like to clarify that the ready doesn't really know who Cillian is... or maybe like Cillian isn't that famous in this fic universe or something because there are a few plot points that may seem questionable... that's all. Anyway... enjoy!!
The autumn you spent with Cillian Murphy would be one you would always remember, not that you really had a choice in whether or not you could forget him.
Your apartment was small and cozy at the time, with a perfect view of the falling leaves outside. It was sitting across from a small park in New York City; the trees were red and orange, and it felt like the fall was putting on a show just for you. You felt fortunate and privileged to live in such a place.
You lived right up the road from a small cafe with a library. Every Thursday, you meet with like-minded writers and read your work aloud. It helped bring you out of your shell; you felt a sense of pride when you read your poetry out loud and had people praise you for being so brave and how well you wrote. Despite the fact you have been attending these little group meetings for almost two years now and you felt pretty comfortable amongst the people who were there, you felt like you could vomit your pounding heart right up every time you stood at that podium in front of the dozen or so people that attended. But even with the lump in your throat, you'd read with a shaky voice and tears ready to spill, you would receive the same round of applause every time and a pat on the back from some of the attendees you were closer with.
It was September 14th when you first saw him, but it wasn't the first time he had seen you, summer still lingering in the air but barely grasping on as Autumn began to take the reigns. You were standing at that cedar-wood podium, reading aloud as nervously as you always did. You had yet to notice him quietly slip in; you were too busy ensuring you were on the right line.
"-And something beautiful sprouted, something that I am not... something that I never will be." You looked up after reading the last line, biting your lip nervously and stepping back from the speaking podium. There he sat, in a sweater and the most hypnotizing eyes you had ever seen. Maybe love at first sight was real, you thought briefly. People clapped, but the room remained silent and still for you as you two made eye contact; he didn't clap; he just stared at you with a look that told you he was just as taken aback by you as you were by him.
He kept attending the sessions, but he never got up and read anything and never really interacted with anyone else; in fact, you'd see him get up and leave once you had finished reading your poetry. You wondered if anyone else noticed him the way you did, or maybe he was a figment of your imagination... a ghost.
It was October 19th when you first spoke with him. You dreamt about him day and night, and you two had never even spoken before every session; you'd wonder if he'd be there, and he always was. Sitting in the same seat, at the very back, going ultimately unnoticed by almost everyone but you.
"Excuse me, sir!" You yelled out, rushing to follow the man in the plaid shirt and beanie. "You dropped this!" It was a pair of keys you had clutched in your hand, the crisp autumn air meeting the apples of your cheeks.
He turned around, only a foot or two away from you, as he looked at you up and down, taking notice of his keys in your hand. "Oh gosh, thank you, love," He took the keys gently out of your hand, his fingers lingering on yours a little too long for a stranger, fingertips brushing together. "I swear I'd lose my head if it weren't screwed on." You took notice of his Irish accent. It made you even more curious to know him better. "Erm... thank you so much."
"It's no problem..." You trailed off. You're not sure what to say now. He gave you a stiff nod and started to turn around and keep walking, but you just couldn't let him leave. "Wait!" What do you say now?
"Yeah?" He turned around, tilting his head at you, blue eyes staring at you, waiting.
"I... I'm Y/N... by the way... I always see you here... but I never see you read anything..."
"Cillian," He chuckled. "Not interested in reading anything I've written, only here to listen." Cillian's response was short but straight to the point.
"You don't stick around for very long... you always leave after... I've finished reading my writing..."
"Well... your work is the only one I come to listen to. The rest of the lots' poems just go in one ear and out the other," He said honestly. "You've got a charm about you; I've never heard anything like what you write. It's unique and intelligent, cleverly crafted written pieces... It captures my attention, unlike the rest, which all seem like people trying to mimic someone else... you write from your heart... or your head... I can't decide which, really." He notices your silence, Cillian steps a bit closer to you. "Perhaps I've said too much." He mumbles. The proximity of where he stands is close enough that you can feel his warmth, a stark contrast to how cold it was outside. "You've surely captivated me, Y/N." He said your name like it was a sacred prayer.
You felt like your heart was in your throat, looking at him dumbfounded and unsure what to say. "That's... very flattering, I don't know what to say... thank you, Cillian..." You scratch behind your ear, swaying nervously on your feet. Cars honked, and people passed by as you two stood outside the little cafe, which was now closed since the reading sessions had ended. Cillian looked around awkwardly before sucking in a deep breath and exhaling, his breath visible out in the open air due to how cold it was.
"Would you like to go out for dinner with me?" Cillian looked at you, eyes reflecting the city lights. The moment felt like something from a movie or something you'd write a poem about. It felt like something that wasn't quite possible within these depths of reality. "I understand... if not... you're a young beautiful woman... probably got someone waitin' at home for y-" "N-No, I'd love to!" You interrupted him, with your heart racing. "I'd love to go to dinner with you... I don't have anyone at home... waiting for me..."
"Well, aren't I lucky... when are you free?" He gave you a smile, the first you'd ever seen from him. It made his usually sombre face light up; he grinned, making you feel all giddy.
"I'm free any time on the weekends... and on Tuesdays, I have work off, so... I would love to... see you this weekend, maybe?"
"Wonderful, Saturday evening, you and me?"
You nodded. You exchanged numbers and went on your merry way, walking down the streets of New York City with a smile on your face that was purely gleeful. People would give you looks, but you didn't care. You were excited about something for once. You obsessed over it for the next day and a half.
October 21st marked your very first date with Cillian Murphy. At six, you waited patiently outside your apartment building in the cold air. With a red scarf wrapped around your neck your nose runny from the autumnal weather, you looked around like a lost puppy.
"Y/N," Cillian's warm voice startled you from behind you. You jumped but swiftly turned around to look at him, a bashful smile on both of your faces. "You look lovely." You felt your heart pound at the sight of him.
"Thank you. You also look lovely yourself." You replied. He leaned in and kissed your cheek before taking your hand in his and guiding you down the street. The feeling of his hand in yours made the cold weather seem like summer. Your body lit in flames at the idea he wanted you close to him. And the feeling of his lips on your cheek remained there the whole evening, burning its mark into your skin.
The night went on, and you found yourself in a charming Italian restaurant. It was nothing too fancy, but it was nice and romantic for a first date, definitely nicer than any other places other guys have taken you. It was just the two of you sitting towards the back, in a small booth, eating your plates of pasta. You talked, and you talked, and you talked. He spoke about how he was an actor; you could see his eyes light up at his passion for his work. He told you he was in New York for work and was filming a movie for something he couldn't legally disclose yet. Your chemistry was magnetic, and the conversation would weave in and out of different subjects. You talked about anything and everything, things like masculinity, The Beatles, the incident that happened on your 21st Birthday, batman, and everything else there was to discuss. You felt like you had known him forever. He said the same thing and referred to you two as twin flames. When you were about to leave, his phone began to ring.
"Fuckin' hell, what is it now?" He groaned. "Probably just a wrong number... or somethin'... hold on, love." He stepped outside, and you watched him on the phone. Cillian looked angry and frustrated, like he was arguing over the phone with someone. Your heart, which once rode the waves of love and joy, now sank beneath them into the deep dark depths of navy blue and dismay, watching him grow angrier and angrier and yell over the phone. He was seeing red.
When he waved for you to come out, you approached him cautiously. He huffed, puffed, and fidgeted his hands in his pockets, clearly restless. "Who was that? Are you okay?" "It was no one," He replied shortly and coldly. "I'm fine, let's go." You didn't say a word after that. The tension was thicker than the cold. You were afraid of saying anything to further upset him. So silence was the answer as he walked you home. You felt disappointed that this was how the night was ending. You wondered who it was and what they had said that had upset him so badly. The familiar apartment building you called home came closer and closer within sight, the disappointment weighing you down like water in your shoes. The disappointment tracing every inch of your freezing skin.
You stood in your elevator with him. He promised to walk you back to your unit at least, and he kept that promise. "Would you like to come in... Cillian?" You asked. You pulled out your house key and unlocked the door, looking at him hopefully.
"No, I'd better not." He remained cold and rigid with you. He couldn't even bring himself to give you a smile. You felt you'd never see him again; maybe he didn't like you the way you thought he did. Maybe he found you obnoxious and dumb. Perhaps the phone call was from another woman he realized was better than you. Maybe you simply needed to be better for him. "Goodnight, Y/N." He turned and walked away; you couldn't speak as tears welled in your eyes. Sorrow built up within you like some sort of horrible game of Jenga; one wrong move and you'd come crashing down and falling apart all over the place.
"Goodnight..." You whispered, but by then, he'd already stepped into the elevator, and the doors shut, taking him away from you. You cried yourself to sleep that night, both out of self-pity and disappointment.
When you awoke, it was to the sounds of soft raps on your front door. It was eight in the morning. Padding gently down the hallway, floorboards creaking, sleep still in your eyes, and your face puffy from the tears that leaked from your tear ducts the previous night, you opened the door, expecting it to be a neighbor asking you if they could borrow some sugar or something along those lines.
"Good morning," Cillian stood at your door, this time with a big apologetic smile, a complete change from last night's cold demeanour. He held a pink, yellow, and white bouquet and a small paper bag in his other hand. "I came here to apologize... for how I treated you last night." "Come in." You ushered him in.
He noted your knick-knacks, the photos on your walls, and your old, worn-out furniture. The way you decorated the place stood out to him, but the look on your face stood out to him the most. Sad, tired eyes, puffy and glazed over, you looked at him expectantly. "I'm so sorry." He whispered to you.
"What for?" You asked as you sat in your favorite olive green armchair. It was velvet and soft, and you'd spend most of your time writing, reading, or drinking your morning cup of coffee.
"For treating you like I didn't care," He sighed. He sat on the leather sofa beside you, gently placing the flowers on your glass coffee table and the paper bag smelling of freshly baked goods. "I don't want to discuss exactly who it was or what happened on that phone call... but I... I shouldn't have shut you out just because I was upset... that was... wrong of me, and I'm sorry." Your anger and sadness dissipated the way a fire dissipates when it's being smothered: immediately. His big blue eyes were the blanket that hushed that flame out, striking him as immediately forgiven.
"I understand, Cillian..." You mumbled, pulling your knees up to your chest. "Things happen... it's alright... I...." You wanted to confront him and tell him how insignificant and stupid he made you feel, but you swallowed it back and gave him a small smile. You remained the people pleaser you always have been. You spared his feelings over your own. "I understand." You repeated.
"I thought... I would make it up to you," He pushed the small paper bag over to you. "We could spend the day together... if you don't already have plans."
The paper bag contained a chocolate eclair. You had written a poem that mentioned eating a chocolate eclair while in a made-up love affair. The rhyming was cheesy, but it was one of Cillian's favorite poems of yours. It was the first one he had heard from you. Of course, you didn't realize the irony of it at the time. You just grinned and accepted it happily. You didn't know that you were engaging in a relationship with a man who was already married. So you took a bite of the eclair, letting him into your fragile heart, and entered this sad and tragic love affair.
So you spent the whole day together. You walked around New York City, holding hands and laughing your heads off. It felt romantic and intimate, and you got to know each other even deeper than you did before. You kissed under a stop sign and shared sweet nothings. The clouds rolled over, and the sky opened up. The rain watered you down like a pair of leaves in a pot plant, and you both ran through Central Park, trying to find the nearest shelter until you came across a large oak tree. It was something out of a movie, sitting together, soaking wet, staring at each other as lightning strikes in the distance. The wind was in your hair, and his lips were on yours.
You spent pretty much every day together after that. You made love in every room of your apartment, cherishing each other's bodies. Cillian would sit in that cafe, and he would clap after your readings and then reward you with a kiss when you got back down to him. You wrote poetry about him, and he would write some for you. It was a beautiful, quiet, little harmonious relationship you had going on. You found yourself falling in love. You thought he was, too, though you never said it out loud.
He even met your dad. They got along quite well. Your dad didn't seem to mind that Cillian was only a few years younger than him (and much older than you). Your dad just wanted to see you happy and safe. In fact, your dad told you he had never seen you more content. Cillian made your dad laugh, they got along like old friends. Seeing them bonding and getting along made you incredibly happy and excited.
On November 16th, at noon, you got ready to go to where he was staying, wrapping that red scarf around your neck again and stepping out into the living room where Cillian waited for you with eyes full of affection. You had packed a small bag since Cillian told you he was staying at his sister's house in upstate New York. She was away at the moment. "Most beautiful girl I've ever seen." He hummed jollily. You wrapped your arm through his and went down to the lobby.
His car had that new car smell, clearly a rental. "No matter how often I've stayed in America, I never get used to driving on the wrong side of the road." Cillian chuckled, exiting his parking spot and beginning the long drive to his sister's house.
The drive was beautiful. Driving through the city and slowly entering into suburban areas, red and brown trees lining the streets, Halloween decorations on display, and music playing through the radio, you both sang along to the words happily. The drive was surreal and peaceful. You drove down a long country road, and the tall trees created a tunnel above you. Only small slits of the grey sky could be seen through the scarlet leaves.
"We're here, Y/N," Cillian smiled at you, stepping out of the car and walking off without you. You hurriedly got out of the car with your things. "Oh, lock the car for me, the button doesn't work... please, love." He tossed you the car keys, not looking where he was throwing them, and they landed in the dirt before you. You ignored how it made you feel (stupid, insignificant, small), picking up the dirty keys and locking the car manually before rushing over to where he was unlocking the door.
The house was nice and quiet and far from the rest of civilization. It felt like home somehow. It is decorated nicely with photos of his sister and her husband, even some with Cillian when he was younger. It was getting dark by now, and you set your belongings down in the guest bedroom where Cillian was staying. You never asked when he was going back to Ireland. You didn't wanna know. You wanted to appreciate your time together instead of counting down the days.
Cillian cooked you dinner and shared a long, loving kiss to say thanks. You sat cuddled up on the couch together afterwards, your crimson scarf hanging over the stair railing as you rested your head lovingly on his shoulder. An old Western movie played in the background, but you were too busy holding each other and whispering sweet things.
"Cillian..." You whispered, pressing soft kisses along his stubbly jaw. "I'm so happy you brought me here... this feels so special." "I'm so happy to have you here, Y/N." He whispered back. Cillian pulled you into his lap. "This is special, just you and me... here... I'm going to make you my own." You wanted to tell him, 'I'm already yours, Cillian; my heart and soul are yours', but you remained silent, smiling dopily at him.
And with those charming words, you kissed him. Flashes of red played through your mind, fireworks sounding off in your head as your lips danced together. His hands cradled your head as you made out nice and slow. Both in your pyjamas now, warming each other up, hands running up and down his back. Cillian's hands wandered down your back until they rested on the tops of your hips, his thumb fiddling with the waistband of your sweatpants.
"Take them off." You hummed, raising your hips slightly off of his, and he obeyed, sliding your pants off until you were only in your panties. Cillian observed how you sat back down on his lap, the lace scrunched up, showing off the curve of your ass.
"I'm going to ravish you." He growled, eyeing you up and down. The timbre of his voice caused your thighs to tightly squeeze together. He pressed you down onto the couch, slipping his pants down until he was just in his briefs. He slipped your shirt over your tits, breasts bouncing out of their containment and straight into his mouth. He sucked happily on your nipples until you were a panting mess, begging for more. "Let me feel you, sweetheart."
"Please..." You exasperated. "Please... Cillian."
Two nimble fingers slipped under your lace underwear, straight down to where your arousal pooled. "So wet f'me, always so wet, aren't you, baby?" He groaned, fingers teasing your slit before sliding back up to rub circles on your clit.
"You know what you do to me..." You breathed out, biting your cherry red lips and closing your eyes, embracing the pleasure. "Always so wet for you, Cillian..."
The way Cillian cradled you in his strong arms as his fingers caressed you to your peak was the most intimate thing you had ever experienced. His eyes watched your face contort with pleasure, mouth open and spilling sounds of satisfaction as you came on his fingers.
"That's it, baby... doing so good," He whispered, kissing your cheek. "So beautiful."
You lolled your head to the side, panting and looking at him with a dazed grin. "Please fuck me."
Cillian laughed at your words. "Such a dirty mouth!" He teased as he tugged down his pants. "Gonna fuck you nice and slow, gonna show you how much you mean to me, love."
Then, in the dim light of the TV and the moon shining through the window, you made love like it was your last night on Earth. Hands ran up and down each other's bodies, trying to savor every final touch. Lips captured together, your bodies working as one, the love was there, glimmering in the light. No words could explain how you felt then; nothing else existed to you, just him and his hands all over your body. You and him for the rest of eternity, at least; that's how it felt in your heart.
You held each other tight in bed, clinging on for dear life. You listened to his heart slow as he slept and the way he breathed. You wondered if he dreamt about you the way you dreamt of him. Eventually, you fell asleep at midnight after watching his pretty face sleeping.
At three in the morning, you wake to an empty bed. Sitting up with a sweat, where did Cillian go? You slip out from under the covers, wincing at the room's cold air that meets your bare legs. You wore one of Cillian's button-ups, only the middle button holding it together as you slowly creep out of the room, listening to the sound of quiet music from the kitchen.
"Cillian?" You called out, cautious and slightly afraid at how dark the house is. It was a lot quieter than you were used to. You were a city girl, unfamiliar with the countryside silence.
"Y/N?" You heard, which relieved your paranoid mind.
Down the stairs, Cillian stood in the fridge's light, soft music playing through a small radio on the kitchen counter. "What're you doing up, Cillian?" You worriedly walked over to him, arms reached out as he turned to look at you, only in his sleep shorts.
"Just needed a midnight snack. I'm alright, my love," He smiled sleepily, with a sheepish look since he wasn't fully awake yet. "C'mere... dance with me."
"Oh... Cillian..." You giggled, walking over to him, letting him wrap you up in his strong arms and sway you gently. "This is nice."
"Mmmm..." Cillian hummed into the soft skin of your neck.
The refrigerator remained open, the cool-tinted light painting you both as you swayed side to side. You were half asleep, and the rocking motion didn't help your drowsiness. You felt as though this was some strange dream.
"Are you real?" You whispered.
"What do you mean?" Cillian purred back.
"I just feel like I made you up." You muttered, pulling your head back to look up at him with big, sleepy eyes.
Cillian looked back at you with the same look. Your wide-eyed gaze and his sweet blue eyes looked like something out of a romance film or something you'd see in a painting. The love you shared was unanimous... or at least you thought so. A kiss and then another kiss and then another turned into a sleepy yet heated make-out.
"Gonna take you right here," He grumbled into your mouth. "My midnight snack."
You giggled at his words as he pressed you against the kitchen island countertop. Kissing so hard it felt like your lips could bruise. He ripped off your shirt and pulled it off you like it was nothing. Cillian growled at the sight of you, hands groping at your tits and lips trailing down your neck. You whimpered, letting your head hang back as he ground his stiff cock into your clothed cunt.
"Fuck!" You whined, wrapping your legs around his hips even further. You ignored the feeling of the marble countertop digging into your lower back; the feeling of his cock was too delicious, too distracting, to really let it ruin the mood. "Cillian, please, baby, just put it in me... need you so bad."
He gave you a grunt and slipped off his shorts before pulling your panties to the side. Cillian acted like a feral dog as he pushed his cock into you and began fucking you on his sister's countertops at three in the morning. The act was sinful.
"Oh god! Yes!" You wailed. You could be as loud as you wanted to out here. No one else was around to hear, and you knew how Cillian liked to hear you scream for him. His hips pistoned in and out of you, cock fitting perfectly inside you. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head. He had never been so rough with you before, but you were enjoying it.
"Best pussy I've ever had," Cillian groaned, sweat dripping from his forehead. "Fuck... so good... feels so good."
His fingernails dug into your hips, grunting into the dips of your neck and shoulders as he chased his own high. You ran your hands up and down his back, leaving scratch marks across his shoulder blades. The fridge remained open, but right now, you didn't care. All you could think about was how good he was fucking you. Drool spilled down your chin, mind blank, and legs went limp from the euphoria taking over.
"Yeah, is that it?" Cillian muttered, voice gritty and low as his hips sputtered. "You gonna cum for me, baby? Gonna cum on my cock?"
"Yes... oh fuck! Yes!" You moaned. "Gonna cum for you, Cillian..."
"Love the way my name sounds comin' from your mouth," He whispered, letting out a mouth-watering whine straight into your ear. Your pussy clenched around him tighter as Cillian, usually a quiet and stoic man, came undone and let out the most delectable pornographic-sounding moans. "Y'make it sound so dirty..."
"Please cum in me..." You whimpered. "Please... need it so bad."
"Really?" Cillian panted and looked at you incredulously. He had never had the pleasure of getting to cum in you yet. "You sure?"
"Yes!" You threw your head back, panting like a dog. "Please, Cillian! Please... give it to me." "Fuck... alright... gonna fill you up, love."
You pressed your face into the curve of his neck, mewling as you came around him and the feeling of his hot cum beginning to spill into you. "I love you." You gasped out, squeezing your eyes shut as you came around him. You meant it; you did love him. You had never loved anyone the way you had loved him. You could see yourself with him for the rest of your life, having his babies, getting married..., and dying together. He just groaned loudly as he came inside you, not saying a word to your confession. Maybe it wasn't the right time, or he would wait until he was done to say something.
"Fuckin' hell..." Cillian whispered as he slipped his softening length out of you and pulled his shorts back up. "Look at that..." He mumbled with amazement, getting down on his knees in front of your quivering and cum-filled pussy.
"Cillian, I-"
"Shhh..." He hushed before pressing a loving nip to your inner thigh, and then he unhinged his jaw and attached his watering mouth to your cunt. You forgot everything you were about to say at the feeling of his tongue licking you up and sucking on your swollen clit. You came again quickly due to how sensitive you were, and Cillian sucked up your gushing juices and his cum that still dripped out of you. Standing up, he grabbed you by the chin and kissed you, spitting the mixture into your mouth, tongues swirling together. You moaned at the salty taste and the dirty act. "Such a good girl..." Cillian hummed. "Swallow it, baby. Show me how good you can be for me."
He watched you gulp it down before leaning in and rewarding you with a wet and messy kiss, teeth grabbing your bottom lip before pulling away. "Cillian..." You whispered, out of breath and incredibly flustered. "That... was so good... I love-" "Let's go to sleep," He interrupted abruptly, crouching and picking up your discarded clothing. "It's real late, sweetheart."
"Oh..." You mumbled, heart breaking a little. "Okay... let's go then." You didn't get a peep of sleep that night. While Cillian snored beside you, one heavy arm draped across you and his hot breath fanning the back of your neck, you stared at the ticking clock with tears slipping down your face. Why didn't he say it back? Why didn't he at least say something? You knew he heard you. The dread built up within you that night, and daylight didn't seem to get any closer.
At 7:47 AM, you were pulled out of a state between consciousness and sleep by Cillian's phone ringing. "Fuck..." Cillian said groggily, reaching over with a heavy hand to pick up his phone. "Who is it?" You moaned out of dissatisfaction from being pulled out of your slumber.
"It's my sister..." He groaned before answering the call. "Hello?.... Yeah, it's alright... no, I don't have anything on today... you're comin' home today?... I thought you'd be home Monday..." You sat up at this, heart racing. Were you going to have to meet his sister today? You were nervous but also excited. Cillian looked over at you with a horrified look in his eye. "Yeah... alright... see you then... bye."
"...Is everything okay?" You asked cautiously.
"Yeah, I guess we're not sleepin' in..." He grunted as he got up and walked towards the en suite. "Gather yer' things, we're going back to the city." "What? Why?"
"I just don't want my sister to know I had a girl over." That was the last thing he said before shutting the bathroom door, clearly in a bad mood. Your heart sank at his words as if it wasn't already hurting. So you got up, fighting back the tears and gathered your things, shoving them back into your bag as you let out a choked sob.
Half an hour passed, Cillian was still in the shower, and you sat at the bottom of the stairs, feeling sorry for yourself. Your bag sat beside you, and the floorboards creaking behind you caught your attention. You turned and looked up at Cillian, dressed in a lovely blue turtle neck, dress pants, and a grim look on his face.
Begrudgingly, you followed him outside and into the car, then began the drive back in silence.
"You wanna grab some lunch wit' me today?" Cillian asked after about twenty minutes of silence.
"No." You said dryly.
"What? You got plans or somethin'?" Cillian asked with a chuckle. The question felt condescending and rude.
"Because what you said to me earlier really fucking hurt me." You hissed, turning to look at Cillian to see him already looking at you.
"What the fuck are you on about?" He barked back, putting his eyes back on the road and giving you that dry, condescending laugh again.
"You said you didn't want your sister to know about me.... that you didn't want your sister to know about you having a girl over."
"Yeah, and?" Cillian quipped, clearly flustered.
"Is that all I am to you?" You whimpered, trying to keep your composure, trying to seem strong. "Just a girl?" "'Course not, Y/N." He said in a hushed tone.
"Then what the fuck are we?" You raised your voice, a tear slipping down your cheek. "Why can't your sister know about me? About us?"
"B-Because..." He faltered before falling completely silent.
"Why, Cillian?" You cried. "You've met my friends... you've even met my father... for fuck's sake... why can't... why can't I meet your sister and her husband?"
He kept his silence. You could see the tears in his eyes that refused to spill. Those tears were just as stubborn as he was.
"Answer me!" You screamed, tears pouring down your exasperated face. "Say something!"
"Because I'm married!" He screeched back.
That shut you up. You leaned back and just stared at your feet. You felt like you had been winded, like all the air in the car had been sucked out, and you were choking on carbon monoxide. He was married. You sobbed as the shock set in, and Cillian pulled the car over to the side of the road, unbuckling his seatbelt. You fell into a state of despair; your chest felt incredibly heavy, and your brain played a loop of hopeless thoughts.
"Y/N," Cillian said firmly, reaching out and placing a soft hand on your shoulder, which you quickly smacked away. "Y/N... look at me..."
You looked over at him, and you could see him wince at the look on your face. He'd never seen you in so much pain. Never had he seen you look at him so coldly. "What?" You spat. "What is it, Cillian?"
"I... I'm sorry."
"Fuck you," You cried harder, covering your face with your hands and leaning on the dashboard. You cried so hard it felt like you could vomit. You felt like the salty tears were slowly dissolving you away. "Fuck you!" You sobbed.
"Y/N... I am sorry."
"If you were sorry..." You hiccuped, looking back at him with red eyes and tears endlessly slipping down your flustered face. "You never would have... you never would have done this to me... you never would have gotten involved with me!"
Cillian sighed and shook his head, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I... I stumbled into that cafe one night, and I saw you and... I heard the way you spoke... and the words you said... and I couldn't believe you were real... and things haven't been amazing in my marriage lately... and I haven't seen my wife in months..." He was rationalizing with you... with the infidelity. "I... I've never met anyone like you."
"You lied to me."
"How was I supposed to tell you I was married, Y/N?" Cillian snapped at you, looking at you with fangs barred. "What was I supposed to say to you?"
"You didn't have to say anything," You sobbed. "You shouldn't have invited me to dinner... you shouldn't have even... you shouldn't have ever shown up to those reading sessions... you just shouldn't have gotten involved with me in the first place!"
"My wife doesn't have to know."
"That... doesn't make it any better," You bawled. "You have a woman... back in Ireland fucking waiting for you, and I'm here... thinking I'm falling in love with you while you fuck me over!"
"I'm sorry..." He whispered, defeated. "I'm so sorry."
Silence.
"Do you feel anything for me?" "Of course, I feel something for you, Y/N... you're-"
"Do you love me?" You corrected. "Could you say you truly and honestly love me?" "I..." He looked away at that. You scoffed and shook your head, wiping tears off your face. "I don't... I don't know... I just..." "What the fuck was going to happen between us?" You cried. "How was this going to end? This was always going to end tragically... wasn't it? Wasn't it, Cillian?"
"I didn't... I never thought about how I was going to end things... I go back home in December... filming ends in two weeks... I was going to spend the last few weeks with you..." You scoffed again loudly. "Aww... how sweet! Spend your last few days with your mistress, who's twenty years younger than you... and then fuck off back to Ireland and go be with your loving wife and your... oh god... you have kids, don't you?" "Yes... I..." "Fuck!" You screamed. It wasn't like you to be so angry. You weren't usually this loud. But the pain was just too much, and you needed some way to get the pent-up rage within you out. "So this is it... this is going to be the last time I'll ever see you."
"It doesn't have to be that way, love," Cillian whispered, placing a hand on your arm; this time, you let it stay there. The shame of having him touch you made you sob again. "We could... spend this last month together... we could... cherish what we have while we still have it." "What we have is gone," You replied. "It's gone! It's dead! You killed it! You can't even say you love me."
"What good would that do?" He pushed you further over the edge. "I mean... I could lie and say I love you... I could feed into your fantasies that this... this could last... but it's not..."
Those words 'I could lie and say I love you' echoed over and over again in your head.
"I know that!" You yelped.
There was a pause. The silence hanging heavy in the autumn air and your teardrops falling into your lap where your hands lay curled up. Cillian's thumb rubbed circles into your arm, and you only cried harder.
"Maybe... if we had been closer in age... maybe we would have... maybe we would have been fine." Cillian broke the silence with that banger. The words ringing in your ears, you didn't reply. You didn't utter a word. Those words made you want to die. A minute or two went past. You just ignored him, ignored the way his hand lit your skin on fire, and ignored the way his eyes bore holes into the side of your skull. "Y/N?"
"Take me home." You muttered.
"Y/N..." He whispered.
"Take me the fuck home, Cillian."
And so he did. He pulled out of the parking spot, and you spent the next hour in an agonizing silence. At some point, the tears stopped falling, and the stupidity sunk in. You felt stupid and ashamed. You had told everyone about him, how happy you were, how handsome and funny... and how sweet he was. And now you sat in the car of a man you felt like you didn't know.
"We're here, Y/N."
"Goodbye, Cillian."
"Please don't do this." He begged, you looked at him, and he had tears in his eyes. "Please." You sucked in a breath, his eyes pleaded with you, and you wanted to stay so badly... you wanted to give him one last kiss and say, 'I understand,' but you knew you couldn't. You were too heartbroken. It was going to end one way or another... and it might as well end now.
"Goodbye, Cillian." You said once more before stepping out of the car and walking off into your building. Never looking back to see the broken man in the car, crying just as hard as you did, loving you just as hard as you did him.
Three months went by. There wasn't a day where you didn't think of him. Not a day passed when you yearned for his touch and to feel him hold you again. You thought about dancing with him in the refrigerator light. You thought about his hand on your thigh as you drove upstate. The memories all too real and... all too there.
And tonight, as snow fell outside, you stood at that same podium, reading the poem you wrote for him. You could barely utter the words, your heart catching in your throat as you looked around the room and spoke the words written on the page.
"Just between us, I remember it all too well." You finished, and the room clapped, but the applause didn't matter. Your heart still felt just as broken as it did the day you left him.
And as you descended from the podium, people would pat you on the back and murmur praises for how well-written your poem was and how well-spoken you were. But your eyes were focused on the hazy figure outside the cafe, the silhouette all too familiar.
And it was wearing that same red scarf you had left behind.
And you knew it was him, watching you from afar. Loving you from a distance... remembering it the same way as you did...
All too well.
-
hope you enjoyed!! Sorry this was all over the place a bit but I really wanted to write something angsty... anyway... there are lots of little easter eggs and references to the song, did you pick them all up? Okay byeee!
#cillian murphy#cillian murphy smut#cillian murphy x reader#cillian x reader#cillian x fem!reader#cillian murphy fanfic#thomas shelby#tommy shelby#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders
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Budweiser (connor murphy x fem!reader)
Scenario: You're one of Connor's best friends- his only friend, in fact. You snuck through his window as you do every Friday, only to find him drunk and sobbing.
A/N: i wrote this in 2nd person but is 1st person preferred? idk, its my first time writing fanfics on tumblr :)
"Con..." You say, gently reaching out to touch his shoulder, to offer some sense of relief, even though you can tell he's far beyond hugging it out at this point.
"No, just-" He cuts himself off with a drunken hiccup as tears roll down his face. "Just leave me alone." He buries his head in his hands, his back shaking with sobs. You wish you could take him in your arms, kiss his pretty face until he stops crying, but you're just friends. Thats all. Thats all you'll ever be.
"Connor, please? Tell me what's wrong?" You coo, your voice soft enough to mirror the voice of a mother speaking to her child. He just shakes his head, flinching slightly as you rub his back gently. "Connor..." You coax, finally getting him to look up at you with his reddened, tear filled eyes.
"You don't love me." He says with a sniffle before bursting into sobs once more.
"I... what? Of course I love you." You say, almost incredulous. And it's true, of course it's true. You love him more than a dog loves his master, crave him more than a flower craves the sun, need him as much as a starving man needs a warm meal. But how can you tell your best friend that when he's drunk and sobbing on his creaky mattress at one in the morning?
"No!" He says, suddenly raising his voice as he stands up abruptly. "No, no, no, you don't love me the way I love you!" The tears roll of his cheeks like raindrops in a thunderstorm. He hiccups dryly, slurring his speech as he continues. "I... I want to kiss you and I want... I want you to be my girlfriend-"
"Connor, you're drunk." You cut him off, almost numb with shock.
"But that doesn't mean my feelings arent real!" He says, shouting now, without any regard for his sleeping sister and parents.
"Con..." Your voice is soft again, kind, the honey-sweet voice he's come to crave every night. "Believe me. If you were sober I would... I would kiss you right now, but you're drunk. I don't want this to be a drunken regret, and I don't want to take advantage of you." You say sternly, but not unkindly. Connor sinks to the bed, smiling goofily now.
"Yeah?" He says, grinning ear-to-ear like a fool. He giggles, then hiccups again, which makes you laugh and then you're both laughing and trying to shush each other at the same time, for fear of awaking Zoe, or worse- Cynthia and Larry.
"Yeah." You whisper, smiling at his dumb grin as you stand, dusting off your jeans. "Text me in the morning if you still feel the same when you're sober, yeah?"
"M'kay. G'night.." He slurs, falling backwards onto his bed.
"Sweet dreams," You whisper as you slide open the window, but as you turn back to check on him one last time, he's already snoring into his tear-stained pillow.
A/N: AAAHHHH i'm scared this is really bad but whatever ig?? i looooove connor sm i think we should actually get married. feedback in comments pls? 🥺🥺
#connor murphy#deh#dear evan hansen#evan hansen#mike faist x reader#connor murphy x reader#connor murphy fanfic#cmurphy#broadway#broadway x reader
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murphy's law sneak peek
author's note: this is just a look into what i've been working on the past few months (again, my b for being the most inconsistent writer ever). please let me know your thoughts! i'm hoping to finish this up VERY soon!! so here are the first two and a half pages of this fic! :))))))
mat barzal x beau's step-sister!reader (bc i'm not white and wanted to leave the reader racially neutral.)
summary:nothing good could come from sleeping with your (step) brother's best friend.
when anthony was traded to vancouver, you felt like the rug had been pulled out from under you. he was your rock since you were twelve when your mom and his dad got married. he was there when you finished your undergrad, and offered up the spare room in his apartment when you started your master's degree at columbia.
but with his new job back in your home country, you knew there was no way you could afford to stay in his apartment. after all, you were nowhere close to making the millions of dollars he did.
"don't worry about it," he said. "i have it taken care of."
what he didn't say was that the solution was staying in mat's extra room.
it wouldn't be that big of a deal, you knew mat just from the sheer amount of time he and anthony spent together. if it wasn't seeing him at games, it was out at bars, or in your shared apartment when you got home from class.
but despite all the interactions you had, almost none of them were meaningful. everything you knew about him started and ended with your connection to tito. and neither of you cared to remedy that.
it didn't mean you two were hostile, didn't even mean that you didn't like each other. it just meant that when tito wasn't around, you two didn't talk.
until you started living together.
the t-shirt incident
it wasn't intentional, you'd swear up and down that it wasn't. you recalled mat's text that he would be out that night and not to wait up for him (not that you ever did, but the sentiment was clearly communicated: stay out of the common areas).
you weren't even doing anything special that night, your boyfriend was out of town on a work trip and you hadn't met friends outside of the islander wags just yet (all of whom were busy that night). so you treated yourself to a shower and a face mask. you'd just finished washing it off when you heard the front door close.
truthfully, you almost stayed in your room until you realized your water cup was empty, and you might've let it go if it wasn't for the past few nights where you woke up craving a sip of water. but you'd like to think you were a considerate roommate, so you waited five minutes for mat to go to his room before you planned on going into the kitchen.
you didn't realize your mistake until you walked into the living room and caught mat and a girl, both shirtless.
to be honest, you weren't sure who screamed first, if it was you or the other girl. you managed to see her lunge for her shirt right as you covered your eyes with one hand and dropped your cup on the floor.
"oh my god," was all you could say.
but the other girl clearly wasn't rendered speechless like you were because she yelled "you didn't say you had a girlfriend, asshole!" before slamming the front door behind her.
you didn't move, couldn't move, too mortified to even acknowledge what you'd just interrupted. very slowly, like he couldn't see you, you bent down and fumbled around with one hand, blindly searching for the cup.
the couch creaked, followed by a heavy sigh from mat. "you can look, you know? nothing you probably haven't seen before."
you peeked between your fingers and saw mat pulling his shirt back on. you dropped your hand and stood up straight almost as soon as he was fully clothed.
cue the apology tour.
"oh my god, mat, i am so sorry! i totally wasn't thinking, i thought you were in your room by this point and i needed water. i didn't even think about what it would look like to your lady friend, if you'd like i can try to catch her before she gets in a cab and explain the situation?"
mat blinked at you. "lady friend?" he asked.
you shrugged. "well, she's a lady, and a friend."
he let out a dry laugh, though his lips didn't curl up in a smile. maybe it was more of a scoff? "friend is a bit of an overstatement. i don't even remember her name."
the room went silent before you caught mat staring at your chest. you glanced down and the urge to dig a hole and die in it crossed your mind.
the seattle thunderbirds logo was staring you in the face.
"oh god, our laundry must've gotten mixed up i'm sorry--"
"i was wondering where that shirt went."
you grabbed the bottom of the shirt before you remembered stripping in front of your new roommate was probably not the best thing to do.
"i can rewash it for you."
he nodded, but otherwise didn't offer anymore commentary.
so you scooped up the cup from the floor and sheepishly sidestepped your way into the kitchen.
and even though it took approximately four seconds to pour yourself a glass of water, you hid in the kitchen until you heard the telltale click of mat's bedroom door.
part of you thought it was best to stay out of his way the next morning, to let mat meander throughout the apartment before he went to his morning skate.
but then you thought about your childhood, and how you pissed anthony and francis off when you were fourteen so you baked them cookies after school and magically, everything was okay between the three of you by the end of the day.
so you woke up earlier than you normally would've to make mat breakfast. you'd made anthony breakfast before, surely mat's diet was about the same?
the eggs were nearly done when you heard his door open. it was only a matter of time before he joined you in the kitchen. you had his protein shaker bottle sitting on the island next to the plate of bacon you'd made. the toast had just popped out of the toaster.
"morning," mat said when he walked into the kitchen.
you whipped your head around to smile at him before focusing on the eggs in front of you. "hope you're hungry," you said. "i made breakfast."
you pulled the pan off the burner and placed them on a potholder. "wasn't sure how you liked your eggs, anthony likes his scrambled, so i just made them scrambled, hope that's okay."
he shrugged and mumbled a quiet thank you before helping himself to the meal you made and fixing his protein shake. you waited until he'd helped himself to the food and took a seat at the island before you said anything, just staring at his profile until he took a bite of the toast.
"i really am sorry about last night," you started. "it wasn't on purpose, i promise." you cleared your throat and made yourself busy by fixing your plate. "next time, i'll just go stay at someone else's place."
mat snorted into his protein shake. a sly smirk was on his lips when he pulled the drink away.
"what?" you asked, looking straight at him.
mat shook his head. "if you left every time i brought a girl over, you'd never be home."
you flushed and directed your eyes back to your plate. "oh."
you couldn't see mat run a hand down his face, but you could hear him sigh. "look," he said and you picked your head up to look into his eyes. "it's just going to be an adjustment. i'll make sure to text you when i'm coming home with a girl and i'll take her to my room as quickly as possible."
"and i'll make myself scarce until the morning."
mat shrugged. "i mean, you live here too, i'm not asking you to be holed up in your room, just maybe don't make an appearance in my shirt until i've at least told the girl about you?"
you nodded almost immediately. "i can do that. i swear, after today, i won't be a problem anymore! you can have literally all the girls over and you won't even know i'm here!"
if only that were true.
#mat barzal#mathew barzal#mat barzal x reader#mat barzal imagine#mathew barzal imagine#nhl blurb#nhl imagines#nhl imagine
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The Love of Another - Part One || Cillian Murphy x actress!Reader
Summary: After meeting on the set of Peaky Blinders, Cillian and Y/N struggle to keep their relationship professional.
Warnings: Swearing, cheating (loose mentions of Cillian being divorced).
Word Count: 3.8k
a/n: I’ve been wanting to write for Cillian for a while, so I hope this reaches the right people! My blog has always been mixed so why not include some more fics with more people?
“I miss you too.” She sighed, sinking deeper into the bathtub with her phone balancing on the ledge. Dipping her head underneath the water, she missed her husband’s next words and came back to the surface with a small splash. The tub was filled just an inch too high, suds lapping over the edge and wetting the bathmat below. “I didn’t catch that last bit. What did you say?”
“I asked if Cillian had stolen my wife yet.” Her husband chuckled, the laughter trailing off when she didn’t immediately respond. “Y/N?”
She sighed, this time in frustration, as she reached with a wet hand to grab the phone. “I can’t even tell if you’re joking anymore.”
There was silence. Then a stutter. “What? Obviously, I’m kidding!”
“Are you though? These so-called jokes about Cillian are becoming a little too frequent…” She looked up to the ceiling, mentally recounting the three previous occasions in that week alone that he’d felt the need to bring her co-star into the conversation. “You call me to check in, but it feels like you’re really calling to see if I’m with someone else.”
“Y/N…”
“Don’t ‘Y/N’ me. This isn’t the first time you’ve been weary of one of my co-stars. I’m not here on holiday, I’m working.”
“I know – “
“So, please stop calling me and accusing me of something you know I would never do. I married you.”
As much as her husband had always supported her career, he’d never gotten used to seeing her play alongside different men. Kissing and romantic scenes made his skin crawl, and now she was a regular on one of the country’s most loved shows and spending a lot of time around the same man, his suspicions only grew. He was well-known to jump to the wildest of conclusions.
He mumbled an apology, and Y/N made an excuse to cut their call short, tossing the phone onto the pile of laundry on the floor. Huffing, she sank back below the bubbles and turned the tap with her foot, adding more hot water. “Marriage…” She muttered to herself, sniggering before closing her eyes and dunking her head beneath the water once again.
She scrubbed at her scalp, relieving tension from the day, and loosening the insane amount of hairspray that had been holding her hair down since eight o’clock that morning. Holding her breath, she stayed underwater for a moment, savouring the few minutes a day she could spend in silence.
The hot water showering her feet stopped and she sat up, pushing her wet hair out of her face. “What was that about marriage?” A familiar voice asked, and she opened her eyes, vision adjusting to the figure sat on the edge of the bath looking down at her. “Let me guess… It’s not all it’s cracked up to be?” He laughed, tugging at the knot in his tie. His hair was fluffy and messy from wearing a hat all day, his collar slightly dirtied from the face powder the make-up team had spent the evening reapplying beneath the hot, harsh lights of the soundstage. Still, he looked like he’d barely done a day’s work and the way that suit hugged his body made Y/N’s stomach flutter.
“Definitely not when your husband doesn’t trust you.”
“And what reason would he have not to trust you? Because…” He stood, slipping off his shoes and pulling the tie off, letting it join her clothes in the corner. “I can’t think of a single one.” He shrugged his jacket off and hung it on the door handle, unbuttoning his sleeves and rolling them up to his elbows.
She giggled as he lifted his foot and stepped into the bath, most of his clothes still on. The water lapped over the side and soaked the floor as he clumsily knocked the shampoo bottles over. She squeezed her legs together and he knelt over her, lowering his upper body towards her, but keeping a hold of the tub to steady himself. “Cillian!” She squealed, watching the water seep into his shirt and trousers.
“Sorry, love. Forgot to ask. Can I join you?” He smirked, cupping water into his hand and dampening his hair with it. With flushed cheeks, whether from the humidity in the room or Cillian’s presence, she smiled at him, reaching out to run her fingers along his jaw.
“Wardrobe are going to kill you.”
“It’s a good thing they’ve got two more suits just like it then, isn’t it?”
“Hm, it feels weird seeing you dressed like that, sounding like that.”
“Would you prefer I talk like this, Mrs Shelby?” He adopted his signature Brummie accent from the show, instantly snapping into character and gazing at her through furrowed brows. She stifled back a laugh, unable to take him seriously with his soddened shirt and hands slipping along the bathtub’s edge. “You’re not supposed to be finding this funny.” His accent melted back to normal through the sentence, a smile creeping onto his own face.
“Sorry, I just don’t see Tommy Shelby diving into a bath on top of his missus.”
“That’s because he’d probably be the one on the bottom.” He teased, dipping a hand into the water and settling it on her waist.
“Don’t get too comfortable. Believe it or not I was enjoying my bath before a fully clothed hooligan decided to jump in.” She propped herself up and fiddled with his buttons, her wet fingers making it a little difficult. She started from the bottom and he gave her a hand up top, before he peeled the damp garment off his body.
“Is that better?” He quipped, as she stared at his character’s tattoo which had started to smudge from a mixture of water and sweat. Nodding, she ran her fingers over his chest, smearing the design even more. “Are you going to wash me? Is that it?”
“Well you need it. You’ve got more makeup on than I’ve had all series!”
“Then let’s get these trousers off too, eh?”
Lying on Cillian’s chest, Y/N listened to his breathing and heart beating. The low light in the bedroom made her eyes feel heavy, but she wasn’t tired enough to sleep just yet. His hand absentmindedly played with her hair, gently massaging her scalp with the very tips of his fingers, being careful not to scratch her. These moments behind closed doors away from prying eyes were their most cherished. They spoke about their days, the hours spent together and apart. Y/N praised Cillian for his performance in a scene earlier that day, and he tried his best to deflect the compliment and switch the subject to her scenes instead. “Will you ever accept my compliments?” She teased, poking him in the chest.
“I will accept your compliments if…” He started, stopping to think. She sat up, looking at him in anticipation. “If you let us finally talk about your birthday.”
“Cillian…”
“You know the studio are going to go all out. You can’t avoid it.”
“I’m turning thirty. I’m ancient! This is not something to be celebrated.” Covering her eyes, she shook her head and groaned. Cillian laughed, lightly swatting her hands away from her face.
“If you’re ancient, then what am I?”
“Men age better, you don’t count. Just let me enjoy my last few days of being twenty-nine.”
His chuckling made her frown twist into a smirk which she tried to hold back. Gazing at her with sleepy blue eyes, he scooted closer cupping her cheek in his hand. “I seem to remember your birthday being rather special.” He cooed, his thumb lightly stroking the soft skin below her eye. She sighed, remembering the moment like it was just days ago.
Thinking back to it with such fondness was wrong. She knew that. One moment on her twenty-ninth birthday snowballed into something so much bigger, and the lingering thirtieth celebrations reminded her just how badly things had gotten out of hand. The lapse in time made it impossible to take everything back. However, selfishly, given the chance, she knew she wouldn’t change a thing.
“Cillian…” She whispered breathlessly, his face still close and mouth still hot against hers. He drew back, his hands remaining on her cheeks, fingertips brushing the skin below her earlobes.
As her eyes fluttered open to meet his, he suddenly let go, catching his head in his right hand. “I’m sorry. God, I’m so sorry.” He stumbled over his words, looking around the room in a panic, eyes darting to the door that was still clearly open, wide enough for anyone to walk past and see what he did. What they did.
“I shouldn’t have done that. Fuck, you’re married! What the hell is wrong with me?”
She stood there, hands trembling by her sides as she watched his gaze jump across the floor, his feet struggling to stay still. Her lips tingled and stung from the contact, almost desperate to kiss him again, to feel his hands on her body. They’d kissed a hundred times on set; playing husband and wife meant that physical contact was just another part of the job, but he’d never kissed her like this. So tender. So slow. Their onscreen kisses were robotic in comparison.
“No one has to know.” The words spilled out of her mouth before her brain could catch up, her arm reaching out for him. He dared himself to look back up to see her flushed cheeks and freshly kissed lips, plump and pink, glistening and hungry for more. Something twisted inside his stomach, and her lashes fluttered innocently in his direction like they were two teenagers in love. She felt as if she couldn’t breathe, like his stare could burn holes through her body.
“No one – has – to know.” She stepped closer with each word, her body making the decisions for her. This feeling and attraction towards Cillian was certainly nothing new, but she never thought he’d return her affection.
Cillian searched for reassurance in her eyes, making sure she really meant what she said as her fingers traced the stitching along his sleeve. Sensing his apprehension, she slipped her hand into his. He sighed, the heat from her fingers sending electricity through his veins, a feeling that felt so right despite how wrong it was.
“We should get back to your party.” He breathed, the muffled sounds of voices and music somehow growing louder as if they were getting closer to the door, closer to finding them together. “Your guests they… Well, you don’t want to keep them waiting.”
“Cillian.” She uttered quietly, pleading for him to look her in the eye and tell her she hadn’t just dreamt the past few minutes. She needed something, anything that would serve as confirmation that she hadn’t imagined it. That she hadn’t imagined his hands holding her face, pulling her to him, their bodies moulding together as their lips met for what felt like the very first time. This was no rehearsed kiss inside four cold white walls; this wasn’t in front of a crew of ten men with cameras zooming in on their faces. This was between the two of them. Raw and real.
Defeated, she dropped his hand and headed to the door. Gripping the handle, she went to pull it towards her until Cillian pressed a firm hand against the wood, slamming it into its frame. He cornered her, his intense stare making her neck hot and her cheeks visibly pinker.
The kiss was hesitant at first; their movements staggered and filled with doubt yet fuelled by longing and the sheer desperation to feel each other again. Once each were confident that the other wanted the same thing, they melted into one another’s grasp, Cillian’s hands tangling into her hair, Y/N’s fingers clutching onto his shirt as if he could disappear at any moment. It was feverish, like a craving had finally been satiated for them both. They knew there was no going back now. They were in this, and they’d have to spend every waking moment hiding it from everyone they knew, both mutual and individual.
“That means it’s been a year since…”
“Since this started.” Cillian waved his finger between himself and Y/N, a reminiscent smile on his face. She never knew how to react when they actually sat and talked about their relationship. It was undoubtedly easier for Cillian, being divorced and completely free to do and see whoever he wanted, but Y/N was still very much married and playing a dangerous game. Every day she lied to her husband’s face and made fun of his insecurities surrounding Cillian. Little did he know, he had every right to be worried about his wife’s co-star, considering he was the one who wound up in her bed at the end of most days.
Cillian opened his mouth to say something but stopped himself. He knew diving into the specifics of their affair made Y/N uneasy. She didn’t like to talk about her marriage; she preferred to pretend that what she and Cillian had was healthy and real. If she didn’t think about her husband, she could convince herself she wasn’t hurting anybody.
“We should get some sleep.” He said comfortingly, wrapping an arm around her as she laid back on his chest. Y/N knew he was trying to distract her from her thoughts, and she was all too willing to escape them, so she closed her eyes and begged for sleep to come quickly.
“Happy birthday!” The cast and crew cheered, clapping and whooping as Y/N stepped onto set. She grinned in faux surprise having been pre-warned by Cillian that they were planning something. A table littered with cupcakes and cookies stood at the side with some crew members already lingering, hoping for an early treat.
“Thanks guys! You shouldn’t have done all of this for me.” Y/N smiled, hugging various people and receiving more birthday wishes as she made her way around the room. Cillian stood by the cameras pretending to look busy, trying not to draw attention to himself. To the outside world they were just castmates, friends at a push. People praised them for their work and chemistry onscreen, unaware of the true feelings below the surface, and the two had grown very good at playing acquaintances around others.
Reaching Cillian, he gave her a quick side hug and a friendly smile. “Happy birthday, Y/N.” He said politely, pulling a small card out of his pocket. “It’s nothing special.” He raised his voice to purposely reach those around them.
“Thank you, Cillian. I’ll add it to the pile.” She beamed, knowing she definitely wouldn’t be adding his card to any pile for anyone else to see. She didn’t know what he’d written, but judging by the glint in his eye, it wasn’t a decoy card to keep up appearances. It was the real thing, and he was playing with fire bringing it into the studio in the first place, but she’d chew his ear off about that later.
When everyone broke off for lunch, Y/N rushed off to her trailer, Cillian’s card burning a hole in her pocket. Throwing the door open, she was surprised to be greeted by a large cake on the counter, iced in her favourite colours with an obnoxious ‘30’ in the middle made from chocolate.
“It’s hazelnut. Your favourite.”
She spun around, confused, only to find her husband sprawled on the sofa behind her. “Surprise.” He grinned, opening his arms for her. She gulped, taking a step forward and leaning down to hug him. He shifted on the sofa, giving her enough space to sit in his lap as he squeezed her tight, feathering little kisses on her cheek.
Her body felt stiff in his arms from shock. It hadn’t even crossed her mind that he would show up, but it made perfect sense. It was her thirtieth birthday, of course he was going to come!
Glancing out of the window over his shoulder, she saw Cillian engaged in an animated conversation with the producers, throwing his head back with laughter. She sighed, wishing there was a way out of this situation, wishing she could run out of the door and disappear with him, leaving the guilt and the pain behind. Hugging her husband felt wrong. She felt ashamed to be dreaming of another man whilst the one she’d sworn her love to was right there in front of her.
“Are you OK?” He asked, moving so they could sit side-by-side.
“Yeah, I’m just surprised!” She lied, her voice high-pitched and shaky. She felt Cillian’s card crumple in her back pocket, but she thanked her lucky stars she didn’t have it on show when she walked into the trailer.
“I had to come and see you on your birthday. What shall we do tonight?” His arm around her shoulder made her feel suffocated and she hoped the ground would somehow magically swallow her up. She shimmied out of his grasp, standing up.
“The crew have organised a night out. I can’t let them down.”
He stood up, his hand settling on her upper arms. “Then we’ll both go. That sound fun?”
Nodding, she closed her eyes, cringing as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I have another scene to shoot this afternoon. Will you be alright hanging in here for a while?”
“What? I can’t come and watch?”
“I don’t think it’s a scene you’d want to see.” Another lie. The scene was a simple conversation between two characters, no drama or romance involved, but it was easier to let him believe it was something he’d find unsettling. The first time he watched her kiss Cillian in a scene, he couldn’t shake the sickly feeling in his stomach all day. As harsh it was to use his insecurity against him, it was far easier than the truth.
I’m having an affair with my co-star who I repeatedly told you not to worry about, and you being here is complicating things further, so I’d rather not spend any more time around you than I have to.
Yeah… Lying was certainly easier.
“I guess I’ll just uh… Stick a film on then.” He shrugged, sitting back down.
“It shouldn’t take too long.” She hovered for a second, then remembered Cillian’s card again. “I’m just going to use the bathroom.”
“OK.”
Locking herself behind the toilet door, she ripped open the card, stuffing the envelope into the small bin beside her.
‘Meet me in the wardrobe department at 1. I’ve got something for you.
Happy birthday, Mrs Shelby.
Yours,
Cillian x’
Her heart fluttered, a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth as she re-read it a second time, then a third. What started as a joke between them became somewhat of a term of affection; calling each other Mr and Mrs Shelby. Cillian could certainly be corny when he wanted to be, but she was no better.
Checking the time on her phone, she had ten minutes to get to the wardrobe department and see Cillian before their lunch hour was over. Remembering her company outside the door, she counted a few seconds before flushing the toilet and rinsing her hands in the sink. She hid the card, pulling her shirt over her trousers so her husband couldn’t see a bump in her pocket.
“I have to go to wardrobe and get into my next outfit.” She muttered, fixing her hair in the mirror and rushing around to avoid making eye contact with her unwanted guest.
“Your lunchtime isn’t even over! Come on, babe. Sit down, let’s chat.”
“You know me, I like to be punctual.” She flashed him a weak smile, pulling out her phone to show him the time. “Plus, we both know how long it can take me to get ready.”
“Fine. But I’m buying you your first birthday drink tonight.”
“I’d be mad if you didn’t.”
He stood to hug her, but she dashed out of the door before he could even get close. Speedwalking to wardrobe, her mind raced back and forth between her husband and Cillian. She was supposed to be happy that he’d traveled all this way for her birthday. She was supposed to jump into his arms and declare how much she’d missed him over the past couple of months, not pray for him to go away. No matter what she did, she couldn’t get Cillian off her mind. He consumed her, emotionally, physically, in every way possible. She never meant for it to go this far, to feel this way, but she couldn’t control it.
Entering the room, she spotted Cillian’s shoes through the racks of clothing. She could hear him mumbling something to himself, but it wasn’t quite coherent. Once he spotted her, his face lit up, eyes twinkling as he gazed at the birthday girl. “Hi.” He whispered, edging closer to her.
“Hi, Cill.”
“I see you got my message.”
“I had to come and see what all the fuss was about.” She smiled, noticing a box on the table behind him. “Is that for me?”
“Impatient, aren’t you?”
“Just curious.” She teased.
Taking her hand in his, he fidgeted with the wedding band on her finger. It wasn’t hers, but her character’s, and Cillian wore a matching one in his role as Tommy. Looking down at their hands, Y/N couldn’t help but think about the ring that was usually in its place, or should’ve been had she not taken it off weeks ago. She thought back to her husband, sitting in her trailer watching some straight to DVD movie on the TV, counting down the minutes until he could finally spend some time with the woman he loved.
Cillian stole her attention, tilting her chin up with his thumb. “There’s something I need to tell you. You’re going to tell me I’m cheesy for saying it on your birthday but - “
“Cillian.”
“No, let me speak, please.” He went over his words again in his head, and Y/N began to panic as his eyes explored her face, pupils dilating. “Y/N, I love - “
“Cillian, my husband is here.” She blurted, exhaling a deep breath. His gaze didn’t leave hers, but the adoration in his eyes quickly switched to shock. His hand fell from her face, and he awkwardly gripped onto the hem of his jacket, rubbing the fabric between his finger and thumb as a distraction.
“…What?”
-
Next Part >
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Let Me Love You | Javier Peña (One Shot)
Javier Peña has been the bane of your existence since you arrived to work for the ambassador. When you find yourself at a loose end following an altercation in the street on your way home, Javier is the only person you could turn to which turns your evening into something you'd never dreamed of.
Pairing | Javier Peña x Reader
Warnings | Smut, oral sex (F receiving), Protected PIV sex, descriptions of physical assault/robber, alcohol consumption but nothing else I can think of.
Word Count | 5.2K
Authors Note | Been holed up in bed this weekend rewatching Narcos and this is the result. I hope you like it! Like, Reblogs and feedback are my lifeblood so please let me know if you enjoy this! Just a warning that I am very high on painkillers and this hasn't been proofread so apologies for any spelling mistakes.
Javier Peña wasn’t used to rejection. Whether he liked it or not he was the epitome of a ladies’ man and had no issue in getting whichever woman he wanted that night into his bed. That was until you came bounding into his life with your apathy and disdain towards him. What he should have done was leave well alone but if there was anything Javier enjoyed it was a challenge and you had become a very personal one to him.
You’d been an assistant to Ambassador Noonan for a few months now – everyone back at home in El Paso had been so proud when you’d beaten everyone else for the role in Colombia, it’s the only time you’d ever seen your father cry. His little girl, all grown up and off to play with the big guns at an overseas posting.
Colombia had been a culture shock, there was no getting around it. It was busy and loud and all sorts of colourful that you weren’t used to but in the best way possible. When you phoned home each Sunday to catch up with your parents you could feel the desire to go back to your old life fading a little.
The only aspect of your job you weren’t fond of was Javier Peña. Almost immediately one arrival he’d made it his personal endeavor to conquer you as another office romance. Almost all the office girls had filled you in on his reputation as the DEA’s resident womanizer and you’d done everything possible in your power to avoid becoming just another notch on his bedpost.
He hadn’t made it easy for you though. It didn’t help that he was just your type. Tall and handsome, with dark brown eyes that pierced right through your own whenever he spoke to you. You’d learnt from the girl who sat on the desk next to you that he was also from Texas and the rumor was that before coming to Colombia he’d jilted his soon-to-be wife on their wedding day.
“You know he’s got eyes for you, right?” She’d said one afternoon a few weeks ago when Javier had tried to get you to shift the ambassador’s entire schedule around so he could present new intelligence.
“I don’t care, miel,” Was what you’d replied, using your limited Spanish to call her honey, the pet name you’d fallen on for each other in the short months you’d worked together, “I worked too hard to get here to become just another of the girls Agent Peña has slept with.”
“Girl, take it from someone who knows, you would not be disappointed.”
You’d waved her off before gathering a pile of files for the ambassador, using the need to drop them off as an excuse to end the conversation. When you arrived back at your desk, Javier’s partner Steve was waiting at your desk.
“Agent Murphy, what a nice surprise.” You weren’t lying, you much preferred to deal with Steve when it came to the pair of agents, he was married and you appreciated that unlike his partner, he didn’t openly gawk at you when trying to hold a conversation.
“Javier sends his apologies, he had to head out to follow a lead…” You shrugged your shoulders at him, “Anyway, he asked me to bring this down for the ambassador and said if you could make sure it lands up on the desk before the end of the day, he would be most appreciative.”
“You know, if you’d come down and asked without mentioning him, I would have done that, but you can tell him the ambassador is very busy and it’ll wait until tomorrow.”
“Oh come on,” Steve groaned, “If not for Javi then for me? He’s gonna chew my ass if I don’t get this sorted.”
“You can tell him if he’s got an issue he can take it up with me personally, surely that’ll get you off the chopping block?”
“I hope you know what you’re getting yourself in for.” Was all Steve replied with before throwing the file down on your desk and walking away.
***
It was late. Later than you’d normally stay at work, but the ambassador had asked you for some financial reports which were proving trickier to put together than you had anticipated. Everyone else had left a while ago, the only sounds in the office were your pen scrawling across paper trying to make the numbers make sense and the far-off sounds of the cleaners in the hallway. That was until you could hear shoes on the flooring coming towards you.
“Querida, what are you doing here this late?”
“I could ask the same of you Agent Peña.” You replied, not looking up from the scrawls of numbers in front of you.
“I just came back after following up on something and Steve said you wouldn’t give the ambassador our intelligence today?”
“Ambassador Noonan is a busy woman, what do you want me to say?” You finally put your pen down to look at him, stood in front of your desk in his stupidly handsome leather jacket with his stupidly handsome hands on his stupidly handsome hips.
“Do you know how important that information is to catching Escobar?” He asked, his eyes boring holes into your own.
“And do you know how many people stand at my desk and insist their files are the most important thing she’s ever going to read in her life?” You countered.
You watched intently as he used one of his hands to pinch the bridge of his nose, you could tell he was thinking about what to say next.
“Listen, I know we’ve not always seen eye to eye,” He began, which earned a scoff from you as if to say no shit, “But this was really important.”
“Like I said to Steve, she’ll get it first thing in the morning.”
Without saying a word back to you, Javier turned on his heels and walked away to leave, before stopping to turn back and say two words you don’t think he’d ever said to you.
“Thank you.
***
Weeks had passed without incident. Javier and Steve hadn’t been around all that much – as far as you’d managed to find out they’d been in and out chasing up leads on Escobar out in the field. You hadn’t even bumped into Javier in the apartment building you all lived at. The only sign of life being the sounds of him and whatever woman he’d bought back that night. It was one of the only downsides to your living arrangement – living right next door to him and having to come up with inventive ways to get to sleep when all you could hear was another woman calling his name.
You’d worked late again. It was a Friday night and everyone else had left a while ago to the bar just around the corner from the embassy. Some of the girls had begged you to go with them but you wanted to get ahead of the ambassador’s schedule for next week, opting instead to spend your Friday pouring over briefing documents and getting everything in a row.
It probably hadn’t been wise considering there had been an increase in cartel violence on the streets – but you knew that the narcos were smarter than to try and attack the American embassy or anyone who they watched entering or leaving. As the clock struck nine you decided to call it a night. There was a long bath and a glass of wine with your name written all over it at home. Picking up your handbag and swapping your office heels for something more comfortable to walk home in you started making your way to your apartment.
You weren’t exactly sure when you became aware that someone was following behind you. You’d noticed the sound of feet on the pavement, but it was a Friday night so that wasn’t all that unusual. Something in your subconscious had told you to speed up a little and you’re sure it was when the footsteps behind you did the same that you began to panic a little. You were only a few blocks away from the apartment building. All you needed to do was make it there and you’d be safe.
The mysterious person behind you had other ideas. You were a street away from the building when you felt a tug on the strap of your handbag. It dragged you backwards and you came face to face with a man. He was much taller than you and had a heavy build. Your brain immediately deciding that fighting him off was impossible.
You tried in vain to drag your handbag from his hands, but his strength was obviously greater. You gave a good fight but suddenly felt a sharp sting across your face. Whoever this man was he’d just hit you. Hard. You could already feel the telltale slither of blood falling from your nose and the impact had caused a cut to your lip as well. The force was enough to make you let go of your handbag and you watched miserably as the man ran back off down the street with it.
You wished him luck – there was a tiny bit of money and the keys to your apartment door but not much else. You tried as hard as you could to stifle a laugh at the situation – a bloody nose, cut lip and judging by the ache behind your eye, a black eye, for a few pesos and a useless door key.
Thankful that you were just a few minutes’ walk away from your apartment you arrived, ready to down a glass of wine until your headache dulled before realise whoever that piece of shit was, he had your keys.
You groaned out loud, leaning yourself against your apartment door. Connie and Steve lived upstairs but it was late, and you had no intention of waking their new baby and invading their apartment. There was only one option. Javier.
You prayed to whichever God out there would listen as you knocked on his front door, hoping that had chosen the comfort of his own home and opposed to a brothel for the night. If he did, it was a lovely night on the floor for you.
It took a moment, but you could hear shuffling at the other side of the door before it swung open to reveal Javier, top buttons undone and without a belt on his jeans.
“Jesus Christ, Querida,” He exclaimed, taking in the sight of your face, bloody and already bruising, “What on earth happened?!”
“Some guy tried to take my bag as I was walking home, when I tried to fight it back from him he hit me,” You explained, “Stupid of me really considering he was at least twice my size.”
Javier ushered you inside, closing the door behind you before motioning for you to sit on his couch, “Was there anything important in there?”
“No, I don’t take papers home with me, just a few hundred pesos and my apartment keys.”
“Okay, that’s good, we can get you a new set keys in the morning,” He spoke over his shoulder as he rooted around in his freezer, “Does it hurt?”
“Are you seriously asking if my bloody nose, split lip and potential black eye hurts?” You shot back, deadpan as he wrapped some ice in a towel, “Yes, it fucking hurts Javier.”
“Alright, I’m sorry, just take this and rest it where it hurts.” He spoke, handing over the ice before heading back to the kitchen.
He returned with two glasses filled with amber liquid which you could only assume was whiskey and popped two pills next to the glass he set down for you, “You know you’re not supposed to take pills with alcohol right?” “Trust me, I’ve been doing it most of my life and I seem to be alright,” Was his response as he sat down in the chair away from you, “Both will help take the sting away, I promise.”
At this point you would do anything to get rid of the dull ache behind your eyeballs so, putting down the ice, you popped both pills on your tongue at the same time before draining the whole glass of whiskey in on go. When you opened your eyes, Javier’s were trained on you, staring.
“What?” You challenged, picking up the ice again, “Never seen a girl shoot a whiskey before?”
Without a word, he stood from the chair and took a few wide strides before he was on his knees on the floor in front of you.
“Let me see.” He all but demanded, moving your hand that was holding the ice to your swollen lip.
Once the ice had moved, he used his hand to lean your chin up so he could see your injuries better. Your breath and caught in your throat at him being so close to you. His eyes were pouring over your face as he turned you into the light to get a better look at each injury.
“Whilst he did a number on you, hermosa,” Javier spoke, “I don’t think you need stitches.”
“Thank the lord for small mercies.” You replied as Javier walked to the kitchen and retrieved the bottle of whiskey, stopping to pour a shot into your glass before doing the same to his own glass.
“Do you want to have a shower?” He asked, “You can get yourself clean and I’ll see if I’ve got some clothes you can wear for tonight.”
You gave a small smile, suddenly feeling quite helpless about the whole situation, “That would be nice Javi, thank you.”
***
The warm water of Javier’s shower did wonders for loosening the joints you hadn’t realized you’d tensed so much. Watching the blood from your nose wash down the drain was concerning, and you were sure the headache you had was getting worse, but you hoped the pills and the alcohol would do their job soon enough.
Once you were wrapped in a towel and stood in Javier’s bedroom, you couldn’t help but chuckle to yourself. He’d lain out a t-shirt and a pair of his boxers, the only clothes you think he could find that would fit you. Once you were dry and had slipped on the clothes you took a moment to gather yourself.
You wondered how many other women had been in this room, wearing his clothes. Granted, you doubted that very few of them, if any, had received a slap round the face in exchange for their bag, but there was a telltale pang of jealously that this felt like something he would do for every girl fresh out of his shower.
“Hermosa…” Javi dragged out of his mouth when he caught site of you leaving his room, before couching a little to cover up the obvious slip of the tongue he hadn’t meant to let leave his thoughts.
“Thank you, I feel much better now.” You replied, taking up your old seat on his couch.
“You shouldn’t be walking back this late on your own by the way.” He offered.
“It’s never been an issue before,” You spoke softly, taking a sip of your drink, “I know things are getting more dangerous, but it really is only a few streets, and I don’t drive.”
“Whenever you need to work late you tell me,” He ordered, “I’m usually always around and I’ll drive you back.” “I don’t need you to be my chauffer, Javier.” You snorted.
“I’m not asking to be your chauffer, querida, I’m asking to be your friend.”
An involuntary snort left your mouth when Javier spoke, “You don’t want to be my friend Javier, you hate me.” Was your response.
A sigh left Javier’s lips, “I don’t hate you querida,” His voice was low, “Quite the opposite actually.”
“What the hell are you talking about Peña?”
Another ragged sigh left his mouth as he pinched the bridge of his nose as if to collect his thoughts, “I like you, okay?” He looked you dead in the eyes, “I Like you very much.”
“But you don’t know anything about me, Javier?!” You exclaimed, not understanding how the man in front of you, who had been the cause of most of your problems since coming to Colombia, was admitting he liked you. This had to be a joke.
“I know enough to make my judgement, hermosa,” He replied, “I know that you’re one of the only women at the embassy who won’t stand for my shit, I know that you’re fiercely intelligent and that you’d do anything in your power to help those you care about, I know you’re from Texas and that tequila is what you like to drink on a Friday when you want to forget about your week. I know you call your family every Sunday and it’s the part of your week you look forward to the most because that’s what you always talk to the girls in the office about when Steve and I come for Monday briefing.”
As he trails off you sit on his couch dumbfounded. Javier Peña liked you. Maybe every time he’d tried to coax you into leaving the bar with him hadn’t been for just another conquest. Maybe when the girls in the office had told you he was flirting with you, it was because he was and not because he wanted you to slip his files to the top of the ambassador’s pile.
“Listen querida,” Javier spoke again, moving so you were caught in his eyeline, “I might not know everything about you, like your favourite colour or how you like your eggs cooked in the morning, but I know that you are the only woman in this godforsaken place that makes me feel anything.”
“It’s orange.” You spoke without thinking, looking him dead in the eye.
“Hmm?” “My favourite colour, it’s orange.”
Javier chuckled, pushing himself up from his seat to sit next to you on the couch, placing a hand lightly on your thigh, “Mine is blue.” He offered, causing you both to laugh at each other.
“Jesus Christ Javi, just kiss me already.”
He didn’t need telling twice. Aware of the injuries to your face, he used his hands to cup either side of your face before pressing a soft kiss to your lips, trying to avoid putting too much pressure on the swelling. He needn’t have worried because almost immediately you snaked a hand around the back of his neck and pulled him in closer, allowing your mouth to open slightly to him.
Javi immediately accepted the invitation of your open mouth, tentatively using it to tangle his tongue with your own as he deepened the kiss. The faint taste of blood in your mouth had him pulling back. You could tell he was searching your face for any signs of discomfort.
“Javi it’s fine, it’s a split lip, just…” You trailed off, pulling him back closer to you, “Don’t stop.”
Instead of latching himself back onto your mouth, Javier used his bodyweight to push you back so you were led on his couch with his body covering yours above you. One of his hands was placed next to your head to keep him held up above you, the other was resting at your hip as he looked down at you.
“You look lovely like this querida,” He breathed, “Trapped underneath me all breathless and wanting.”
“It’s not nice to tease, Peña.” Came your response as you bucked your hips towards him slightly, letting him know you needed him.
He smirked down at you before taking the assault of his mouth to your neck. He pressed open mouth kisses down your throat and along your collarbone as his hand slowly worked the hem of your shirt free from where you’d tucked it into your skirt before tracing his fingers up inside the material to rest just under the band of your bra.
A moan ripped from your throat as Javier bit down on the skin behind your ear, sucking gently but enough that you knew there would be a mark there in the morning.
“You like that huh?” He whispered into your ear, “You like it when I mark you?”
“Mmm Hmm.” Was all you could manage to get out as Javier continued to trail his mouth over your exposed skin.
“Words, Hermosa,” He stopped, lifting his head to look you in the eye, “Use them.”
“Ye…yes, I like it whe… when you mark me, Javi.” Came your strangled reply.
“I bet you do,” He rasped into your ear, “I bet if I slipped my hand into your panties you’d be wet for me, wouldn’t you?”
“Yes!” You called out without even thinking, “Oh my god Javi please take my clothes off and touch me.”
You almost expected Javier to tease you more at this point but instead, he pushed himself back so he was knelt between your thighs before making quick work on situating himself on the floor on his knees.
“Sit up for me hermosa.” He spoke, helping you to move yourself so your ass was only just hanging onto the edge of the couch with your back up against it.
Almost on instinct your spread your legs wide for him, watching as he bunched your skirt up against your waist, revealing the light grey cotton panties you’d thrown on this morning. If you’d known then that by the evening you’d be baring them to Javier’s face, you’d have picked something sexier.
You looked down at him between your thighs and saw his chest was heaving slightly with his heavy breathing, “What’s this?” He asked, before brushing his fingers over the material that was covering your core, “You’re soaking already, this little wet patch is giving you away.”
A light moan left your lips as his fingers moved from the wet patch at your entrance all the way up to where he could touch your clit. His touch was feather light but just like anything he’d done in the past few minutes it was lighting you on fire.
“I’m going to eat your pussy, darling girl,” He spoke, hooking his fingers around your panties to drag them off, “Is that okay?”
“Only if you’re good at it, Peña.” Came your response.
If he wanted to respond to your smart mouth he thought better of it. Pulling your panties all the way off and discarding them somewhere on the floor behind him before bringing his face as close to your pussy as he could get without touching you. He stayed like that for what felt like hours as he watched your wiggle your hips and move about to try and get his mouth to touch you.
When he finally did put his mouth to you it was like the universe exploded. He licked a single stripe from your entrance to your clit, using the tip of his tongue to tease the bundle of nerves before pulling away. A petulant whine left your mouth but Javier had waited a long time for this so it wasn’t long until his tongue was back to teasing your clit. He switched between light flicks of his tongue to enveloping your clit between his lips to suck on it. Within no time your hands were tangled in his hair and you were grinding your pussy into his mouth, begging him to make you cum.
“You want to cum, hermosa?” He asked, tearing himself away from your pussy, “You going to make a mess of my face?”
“Oh god,” You moaned, “Javi please, it’s too much.” You looked down and watched as he smirked at you before latching his mouth back around your clit. You’d never felt like this with anyone before, you could certainly understand why most of the girls in the office were obsessed with this man if this is what he could do to them in mere minutes. A flash of jealousy seeped into you which you tried to push to the back of your mind.
Suddenly you felt him push two fingers inside your aching pussy. Your felt him expertly curl them upwards, hitting a spot inside you that you weren’t aware could feel so good. Your hips began moving to meet the thrusts of his fingers inside you as his tongue continued teasing your clit. You could feel the telltale tightening in your abdomen and just silently prayed to god that he didn’t stop.
“I can feel you getting tighter around my fingers hermosa,” Javi groaned from your pussy, “I want you to cum for me.”
His words mixed with the assault of his fingers and mouth were all you needed at that point. Your thighs tightened around his face as you cried out his name whilst his mouth worked your through your orgasm.
Once Javi had worked you through most of the aftershocks of your orgasm he sat back on his heels to look at you.
“I don’t think anyone has made me cum like that,” You spoke breathlessly, “That was insane.” You took the time to look at Javi, from his place sat on the floor.
His mouth was glistening with your slick and the further you let your eye roam the better the view got, until your eyes settled on the prominent bulge at the front of his jeans.
“Looks like you’ve got a little problem there, agent.” You teased, pointing to him.
“Little?” He asked, raising an eyebrow, “You’re going to regret that.”
He stood, making light work of removing the belt that held his jeans up, “Turn around and lift your skirt up.” He ordered.
You did as you were told, draping the upper half of your body over the back of the couch, widening your legs so Javier had a view of your ass and your exposed pussy. You looked over your shoulder to find him fishing a condom out of his wallet before shedding himself of his jeans and boxers. Little had been as far from correct as you could have been. His cock was hard and you watched intently as he rolled the condom on swiftly. Your mouth watered at the thought of having him heavy in your mouth.
“Enjoying the show?” He asked as he moved behind you, letting two of his fingers dip into your pussy, “So wet for me hermosa, you ready for my cock?”
“Yes Javi,” You breathed, moving yourself back in an attempt to get him closer to you, “I want you to fill me up.”
“Whatever you want, darling girl.” Was his answer.
You felt him scoot up behind you, taking your hip in one of his hands, using the other to guide the head of his cock to your wet slit. The friction caused when he started pushing inside of your was delightful. He was big, the biggest you think you’d ever taken but the feeling of fullness was overwhelming.
You could hear soft grunts from behind you as he pushed himself all the way into you, stilling once he had bottomed out, “You okay?” He asked softly into your ear as the hand at your hip squeezed lightly.
“Fuck Javi,” You moaned, “You’re so fucking big, it feels so good.” “Yeah?” He asked, a slight chuckle to his voice, “You like my cock inside of you?”
“Uh huh.” You managed to drag out from your mouth as he slowly pulled out and thrust back into you.
The pace was slow to begin with, giving you a chance to get used to his size within you and half because Javier knew if he started his usual bruising pace with you, he would be done in mere seconds. God you felt good around him.
“Javi please,” You begged, “I need you to move.”
“You want me to fuck you?” He asked, pulling his cock almost all the way out of your pussy before stilling, “Needy little thing, begging for my cock like that.”
He wasn’t one to deny a lady what she wanted though so he set about giving you exactly what you wanted. Soon enough he was pounding into your pussy from behind. The strangled cries that he pulled from your lips were enough to let him know you were enjoying yourself – pair those sounds with the way your pussy was clenching around him every time he pushed himself into you and he was ready to come undone.
“You’re such a good girl for me aren’t you?” He cooed into your ear as the hand that wasn’t keeping him upright tangled in your hair, “Put your hand on your pussy baby,” He ordered, “Make yourself cum on my cock.”
You did as you were told, snaking one of your hands underneath your body. You used one of your fingers to circle your clit, the wetness dripping from your entrance enough to slicken you.
“That it’s baby,” Javier spoke in encouragement, “I can feel that pussy clenching around me, you going to cum for me?”
The entire thing was overwhelming – the filth falling from Javi’s mouth, the feeling of his cock filling you up and your fingers on your clit pushing you to the edge. Your second orgasm creeped up on you, falling over you in waves as you cried Javi’s name.
“God fucking dammit,” Came a voice from behind you, “Baby I’m going to cum.”
Words had failed you, but you moaned in approval, doing what you could to push your pussy further into Javi’s hips. A few more thrusts and he stilled within you, letting out a raged moan as his hand squeezed hard enough to bruise at your hips.
Javier stayed still for as long as he could, letting the two of you catch your breath for a moment before he pulled himself out of you. Without his body to keep you upright you collapsed into the couch, doing what you could to pull your skirt down so you weren’t bared to the room anymore.
Javi padded back into the room after disposing of the condom in his bathroom. He sat down on the couch, lifting your legs to rest against his thighs. He was still dressed in his shirt and had thrown on a fresh pair of boxers on his way back to you.
“Javi…” You spoke, drawing his attention to you.
“What is it, hermosa?”
“I think we skipped right past friends, don’t you?”
A laugh erupted from his mouth. You think it’s the first time you’ve seen him properly laugh and you like it.
“You mean your friends don’t eat your pussy and fuck you like that?” He asked, raising his eyebrows at you.
You let your hand swat his arm, “You know, I can’t say they do.”
His eyes darkened slightly as they looked at you, “Does that mean they don’t wrap you up in bed, let you sleep for a few hours and then wake you up to bury themselves inside of you?”
Your eyes widened at the insinuation. You’d assumed you’d spend the night sleeping on his couch until you could slip out and get your keys sorted.
“You want me to sleep in your bed?” “Hermosa….” He breathed, “We won’t be sleeping much at all.”
#javier pena#narcos#Pedro pascal#Javier pena smut#Javier pena fic#javier pena x reader#javier pena x female reader#javier pena x f!reader#javier pena x you#javier pena fanfiction#Javier pena Pedro pascal
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Okay so would Levi be the type to answer interviews if he ever is a celebrity in a modern AU? Especially ones that he prefers to keep since I've seen a lot of celebrity play along interviewers just to satisfy them by giving them an answer. Let's say for example questions about how he met his y/n, how he started and etc.
Hi love!
You know, I think a lot about Levi as an actor, but in a really weird way... It's hard to explain, lol. But if I were to imagine Levi's personality as an actor, I think he'd be like Cillian Murphy.
If you asked him about social media, he'd probably say, "I'm too old for that," and move on. I mean, if he's just Levi who happens to be an actor, and not an actor playing Levi (if that makes any sense). Levi would hardly ever give answers about his personal life just to please someone else. So if an interviewer kept asking personal questions, Levi might just grab the mic with his best deadpan face and say, "Do you have any questions related to the movie/show? Because that's why I'm here."
I feel like if Levi were an actor, he'd be so antisocial, and people would hardly know anything about his personal life. Yet, he'd still be so respected, haha. The only personal interaction I could see Levi discussing is his wife, simply because he'd want to showcase that he's happily married and to keep any rumors at bay.
There are two scenes from Argentinian actors being asked about their wives that always remind me of Levi. One was when an interviewer asked, "How would you define your wife?" and Levi would respond, "I don't define her because that would be limiting her, and I don't do that. Next question."
Another was, "If someone were to travel to your hometown, what's the best place to eat that you'd recommend?"
"None, because the best place to eat in my hometown is wherever my wife cooks, and sadly, you're not invited. I don't share her."
I also can't stop seeing Levi as an Argentinian singer who, when chased by paparazzi, said, "People, your people miss you, Levi."
"That's their problem," Levi would reply.
Haha, overall, he'd be a great actor... just not the friendliest with the media, lmao.
#levi ackerman#levi#captain levi#levi aot#snk levi#levi x reader#levi x y/n#aot levi#snk levi ackerman#levi ackerman x reader#levi ackeman#levi attack on titan#captain levi ackerman x you#captain levi x reader#captian levi x reader#captain levi ackerman x y/n#captain levi x you#levi shingeki no kyojin#levi x you#aot#attack on titan#snk#shingeki no kyojin#attack on titans#levi ackerman snk#levi ackerman x female!reader
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Title: My control
Summary: You were impossible, but Elliott wouldn't have you any other way.
Pairing: Elliott Marston × Fem! Reader
Warnings: Smut
Author's Notes: Hello everyone. I think I'm going to be away from Tumblr for a while, so don't be surprised if I stop posting regularly. I'll be busy with some things and it may take me a while to get back, but I promise I'll return. 🥰 As for the story, I was inspired to write it by a Brazilian film. I hope you like it.
Also read on Ao3
Elliott Marston paced restlessly in the grand foyer of your house, his tall frame and piercing gaze filled with anger and frustration. The sun was setting, casting long shadows across the floor as he waited for you to return. He should have known better than to marry a woman as bold as you, but her beauty had ensnared him, blinding him to the challenges that came with it. Now, he regretted it all—the impetuous decision, the spirited arguments, the nights of passion that turned into confrontations.
There was a sharp knock on the door, and he heard your voice calling from outside. "Elliott, open the door. Let me in."
He strode to the door and yanked it open, his baritone voice cold and cutting. "You're late," he snapped, his eyes narrowing as he took in your appearance. "What, were you at a pub, carousing with the local riffraff?"
You stood there, a defiant expression on your face, your hair windswept from the journey. "I was at Mrs. Murphy's, as I said I would be," you retorted, holding your ground.
Elliott scoffed and backed away, his anger palpable. He gathered the clothes he had already prepared for you and began throwing each piece at you. "This is a respectable house. You will not enter, you shameless woman," he declared, his voice laced with disdain.
You were indignant, scrambling to collect the clothes that were tossed at you. "Elliott, please, can't we discuss this like civilized people?" you pleaded, your voice rising with frustration.
He ignored your plea, his face darkening with fury. "You will sleep on the street tonight so everyone can see what a wanton woman you are," he spat, slamming the door in your face.
Outside, you gathered the rest of your scattered clothes from the floor, seething with anger at your husband's arrogance and stubbornness. "Damn you, Elliott!" you shouted, hurling the last garment towards the door. "You cannot treat me like this!"
Your voice rang in the quiet night, and you paused, listening for any response. But there was none. Anger burned in your chest as you stood alone in the darkness, the cool night air stirring around you. The grand house loomed darkly, its windows like accusatory eyes.
After a moment, you gathered your resolve. "Fine, if he wants to make a spectacle of me, so be it," you muttered to yourself, your tone defiant. You straightened your shoulders and turned towards the path leading away from the house.
In the distance, you saw the silhouette of one of Elliott's employees hurrying down the lane. You recognized him as Tom, the stable hand. He was Elliott's loyal servant, dutifully following orders no matter how cruel they might be.
"Tom!" you called out, your voice cutting through the quiet night.
Tom turned towards you, hesitating for a moment before he reluctantly approached. "Ma'am," he greeted you with a nod, his eyes avoiding yours.
"You're going to fetch the town priest, aren't you?" you asked, your voice steady despite the turmoil raging within you.
Tom glanced at the ground, uncomfortable with the task he'd been assigned. "Yes, ma'am," he mumbled, shifting uncomfortably.
You took a deep breath, holding Tom's gaze firmly. "Tell the priest that he will find me here. I'll wait," you said, your tone commanding.
Tom nodded again, turning away without another word. As he hurried back towards town, you watched him disappear into the night, the weight of the situation settling heavily upon you.
Alone in the dark, you took a moment to collect yourself. "I can't believe it's come to this," you whispered to yourself, your voice filled with a mixture of sadness and anger.
But as you stood there in the dark, an idea began to take shape in your mind. You quickly formulated a plan, a reckless gambit driven by equal parts desperation and determination. A small smile touched your lips as you turned back towards the house.
Steeling yourself, you walked up to the grand front door. "Elliott!" you called out, your voice carrying clear and true through the night air.
Inside the house, Elliott's baritone voice barked back, cold and dismissive, "You're not welcome here, woman! Go away!"
Ignoring his venomous words, you continued, "Elliott, please open the door. I can't live without you. I love you too much to go on without you. I'm going to kill myself, Elliott."
Inside, Elliott laughed bitterly, the sound echoing through the heavy wooden door. "Lies! All lies! I sent for the priest so he can see what kind of woman you truly are," he sneered, his voice dripping with disdain.
Your heart raced, the pain of his rejection cutting deep. But you didn't hesitate. With a swift movement, you reached for the pistol you had hidden on your thigh, your hand closing around the cold steel. Holding the gun up, you shouted a last, desperate goodbye to Elliott, "Farewell, my love!"
With a quick and determined motion, you drew the pistol from its hidden holster, your fingers trembling with adrenaline and resolve. Without another moment's hesitation, you aimed the gun at the ground and pulled the trigger. The deafening crack split the silence of the night, echoing through the grand estate.
Inside the house, Elliott's eyes widened in shock at the sound of the gunshot. "My love!" he shouted, his heart clenching with terror and despair. Without a second thought, he bolted towards the door, his mind racing with fear that you had taken your own life.
Frantically, Elliott threw open the door and rushed outside, his hat askew and his mustache bristling with panic. His eyes scanned the darkness, searching desperately for any sign of your body. "No, no, no!" he muttered under his breath, his voice choked with anguish. "Please, my love, don't leave me!"
But then, he heard footsteps passing behind him, and he whirled around in confusion. There you stood, illuminated by the soft glow of the moon, blowing him a teasing kiss before disappearing into the house and closing the door behind you.
Elliott's shock turned to indignation as the realization dawned on him. "It was all a setup," he muttered to himself, his voice tinged with resentment. Clenching his fists in frustration, he marched up to the door and pounded on it, demanding entry.
You swung the door open with a flourish, a mischievous glint in your eyes as you tossed a pile of clothes at him, just as he had done to you earlier. "This is a respectable house, Elliott," you declared, your tone dripping with mock disdain. "You will not enter, you shameless man."
Elliott was stunned, looking at you in disbelief. But you merely chuckled, relishing the taste of revenge as you slammed the door shut in his face. "You will sleep on the street tonight so everyone can see what a dissolute man you are," you retorted, your voice ringing with satisfaction.
Outside, Elliott seethed with frustration, his pride wounded and his heart yearning for reconciliation. "Damn you, [Your Name]!" he shouted, his voice echoing in the night. But there was no response, except for the distant laughter of the wind as it swept through the trees.
He kept pounding on the door, his baritone voice filled with anger and desperation. "Let me in, woman! This is my house!" His shouts echoed through the night, growing more insistent with each passing moment. Inside, you listened with satisfaction, refusing to yield.
Just then, the town priest arrived, a lantern swinging from his hand as he hurried up the path. His eyes, weary from years of settling domestic disputes, took in the scene with a mixture of curiosity and concern. "What in heaven's name is going on here?" he called out, his voice steady and authoritative.
Elliott turned to the priest, his frustration palpable. "Father, she's gone mad! She’s locked me out of my own home! She came home late that night, and—" He gestured wildly at the closed door, his mustache bristling with indignation.
Before the priest could respond, you opened the door just wide enough to throw a bucket of ice water at Elliott. He shouted in shock, his sharp attire now clinging to his frame. "You vile woman!" he bellowed, shaking off the water.
"Don't listen to him, Father," you said, your voice quivering with feigned distress. "He's drunk and raving. He doesn't know what he's saying."
The priest's eyes widened with concern as he turned to you. "Is this true, my child? Is Elliott intoxicated?"
You nodded, tears welling up in your eyes as you put on a show of desolation. "Father, I'm so tired of this. Every night he comes home late, reeking of alcohol. I can't take it anymore." You wiped away a tear, your voice breaking.
Elliott spluttered, trying to regain his composure. "Lies, all of it! She was the one who arrived—"
The priest raised a hand to silence him, his expression stern. "Elliott, I will not tolerate such behavior. You will ask your wife for forgiveness at once."
Elliott's face turned red with rage and humiliation. He clenched his fists, struggling to contain his anger. "This is absurd!" he protested, but the priest's unwavering gaze left him no choice.
With a deep breath, Elliott turned to you, his voice strained. "Forgive me," he said through clenched teeth, his pride wounded beyond measure.
You held out your hand, a satisfied smile playing on your lips. "Of course, Elliott. I forgive you," you replied, relishing the taste of victory.
Elliott bent down, his heart heavy with resentment, and kissed your hand. Inside, he seethed, but outwardly, he maintained the facade. The priest nodded approvingly, believing the reconciliation to be genuine.
"Good," the priest said, his tone final. "Now, Elliott, you will show your wife the respect she deserves. I expect to hear no more of this drunken behavior."
Elliott's eyes met yours, filled with a mixture of anger and grudging admiration. "Yes, Father," he muttered, his baritone voice low and defeated.
As the priest turned to leave, you gave Elliott a look of triumph. He had no choice but to accept his defeat, at least for now. The tables had turned, and you were in control, your victory as sweet as the cool night air.
The heavy wooden door creaked as you opened it wide, allowing Elliott to enter. "Come in," you said, your voice laced with a mix of triumph and concern. Elliott picked up his hat from the floor, his eyes burning with fury, and stormed past you, dripping wet as he made his way to the bedroom.
You followed him, your heart pounding with a mixture of defiance and apprehension. As you entered the room, Elliott was already stripping off his soaked clothes, his movements sharp and angry. You moved to help him, but he suddenly grabbed you by the neck, his baritone voice a growl of contempt.
"You're manipulative," he spat, his grip tightening. "It should be you asking for forgiveness, not me!"
You struggled for a moment, your pulse racing with fear and anger. Then, with a swift motion, you broke free from his hold. "Elliott, please," you said, your voice steady despite the turmoil within you. "Let me help you."
He glared at you, his breath ragged with rage, but as you reached out to help him take off his wet clothes, he didn't resist. His muscles tensed under your touch, but there was a hint of vulnerability there, too, a crack in the hard exterior.
As you gently peeled away his soaked shirt, Elliott huffed in anger, but he couldn't completely hide the way his body responded to your touch. His eyes softened slightly, betraying the struggle within him. You leaned in closer, your lips brushing against his neck, and felt the tension start to melt away.
"You know the power I have over you," you whispered, your voice a soothing balm to his wounded pride.
Elliott's breath hitched, his resistance waning as you kissed him softly. His hands, which had moments before been filled with fury, now rested gently on your waist. "Damn you," he murmured, his voice a mix of anger and longing.
But despite his words, he didn't pull away. Instead, he drew you closer, his lips finding yours in a kiss that was both fierce and tender. In that moment, the battles of pride and power faded into the background, replaced by the undeniable connection between you.
You helped him out of the rest of his wet clothes, your hands moving with a mix of tenderness and command. Elliott's anger seemed to dissipate with each touch, each kiss, as if your very presence had the power to soothe the storm within him.
As he stood there, now free of his wet clothes, Elliott looked at you with a mixture of frustration and desire. "You're impossible," he muttered, but his voice had lost its edge.
You smiled softly, your fingers trailing along his chest. "And yet, you can't resist me," you replied, your tone both teasing and tender.
Elliott's eyes darkened with a mixture of emotions, and he pulled you closer, his grip firm but no longer harsh. "I hate that you're right," he whispered, his lips brushing against yours once more.
The tension between you melted away completely as the kiss deepened, the room around you fading into insignificance. In that moment, all that mattered was the undeniable bond between you, a connection that neither pride nor anger could break.
As you held each other, the night's earlier conflict seemed like a distant memory, replaced by the warmth and passion that only the two of you could share. And as the cool night air seeped into the room, you knew that, for now, you had won the battle, and Elliott was yours once more.
Elliott's hands roamed down your back, settling firmly on your ass. You moaned into his mouth as he squeezed, feeling the raw power in his grip. His anger still simmered, palpable in his touch. "Do you think you can leave whenever you want and return without consequence?" he growled against your lips, his voice a low, dangerous rumble.
You were startled when he broke the kiss abruptly, pulling you towards the bed with a force that sent a shiver of anticipation through you. Elliott sat down, yanking you over his knees, his grip unyielding. "This is what happens to naughty girls," he muttered, the first slap landing on your ass with a sharp crack.
You screamed, more in surprise than pain, the sound echoing in the quiet room. His hand came down again, and again, each slap igniting a fiery sting. But instead of cowering, you laughed, your defiance only spurring him on. You tilted your ass upwards, inviting more of the punishing blows.
"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Elliott's voice was a mix of frustration and grudging admiration. "Naughty girl," he growled, feeling the heat in his palm and the wetness seeping through your panties. He pulled up your dress, yanking down your panties to reveal your reddened ass and glistening pussy. The sight of you, so brazenly aroused, stirred something primal within him.
"Damn, you're insatiable," he muttered, his own arousal evident. He couldn't deny the effect you had on him, the way your defiance only made you more irresistible. His hand traced the curve of your ass, fingers teasing the sensitive skin before delivering another sharp slap.
You moaned louder, your body arching in response. "Please, Elliott," you gasped, the line between pleasure and pain blurring deliciously.
"Please, what?" he taunted, his fingers dipping between your thighs, feeling the slickness of your arousal. "Do you want more?"
"Yes," you whispered, your voice trembling with need.
"Say it," he commanded, his breath hot against your ear.
"I want more, Elliott," you begged, your hips pushing back against his hand.
"Good girl," he murmured, his fingers finding your clit, circling it with deliberate, teasing strokes. The sensation was maddening, your body trembling with the need for release.
Elliott's hand continued its merciless rhythm, alternating between sharp slaps and teasing caresses. "You're so wet for me," he said, his voice thick with desire. "You love being punished, don't you?"
"Yes, I do," you admitted, your breath hitching as his fingers plunged into you, curling just right.
He groaned at your admission, the sound vibrating through you. "You're going to be the death of me," he muttered, pulling his fingers out and slapping your ass once more, harder this time.
Your body responded instinctively, arching into his touch, but when Elliott did nothing, you knew it was your turn to take control. Pushing yourself up from his knees, you straddled him, your movements deliberate and assertive. You could see the surprise in his eyes, quickly replaced by a glimmer of excitement as you undid his pants just enough to free his cock.
“Think you can control me?” you whispered, your voice dripping with challenge as you positioned yourself over him.
Elliott's hands moved to your hips, gripping them firmly. “You love it when I do,” he countered, his tone filled with that familiar mix of arrogance and lust.
Ignoring his words, you sank down onto him, a gasp escaping both your lips as you took him in. Your hands gripped his shoulders for support as you began to ride him, your movements fierce and determined, like a wild horse taming her rider.
Elliott thrust up to meet you, matching your intensity. “You're like a wild thing,” he muttered, his eyes dark with desire. “So beautiful, so defiant.”
“Always trying to break me,” you replied, leaning down to nip at his ear, your breath hot against his skin. “But you never will.”
He groaned, his hands tightening on your hips, guiding your movements. “We’ll see about that,” he growled, thrusting harder, trying to regain control. “You forget who you belong to.”
You laughed, a sound of pure defiance. “I belong to no one,” you shot back, increasing the pace, riding him with a fierce determination that left him struggling to keep up. “And I will always make you remember that.”
Elliott’s eyes flashed with a mix of anger and admiration. “You’re a vixen,” he said through gritted teeth, his hands roaming up to your breasts, squeezing them possessively. “A beautiful, infuriating vixen.”
You moaned, feeling the familiar rush of pleasure and power. “And you love it,” you teased, grinding down harder, making him gasp.
“Damn you,” he muttered, his control slipping as he matched your rhythm. “You drive me mad.”
You leaned in closer, your lips brushing against his. “Good,” you whispered, your voice a seductive purr. “I want you mad with desire.”
Elliott’s response was a low growl, his hands moving to your ass, squeezing hard as he thrust up into you with renewed intensity. “You’ll pay for this,” he promised, his voice thick with need.
“Promises, promises,” you taunted, throwing your head back, your movements wild and uninhibited.
The two of you moved together in a fierce battle for dominance, each trying to assert control over the other. Elliott’s charm and raw power met your beauty and defiance in a clash of wills that left you both breathless.
“Admit it,” Elliott said, his voice ragged. “You love it when I take control.”
You shook your head, a wicked smile playing on your lips. “Never,” you replied, tightening around him, driving him to the edge. “But I love watching you try.”
With a final, desperate thrust, Elliott cried out, his body shuddering with release. You followed moments later, your own climax ripping through you with an intensity that left you both trembling.
As the waves of pleasure subsided, you collapsed against him, both of you breathing heavily. Elliott’s hands moved to your back, holding you close, a grudging respect in his eyes.
“You’re impossible,” he muttered, his tone softer now, almost affectionate.
“And you wouldn’t have me any other way,” you replied, resting your forehead against his, a satisfied smile on your lips.
For a moment, the conflict between you faded into the background, replaced by a rare moment of intimacy. In the dim light of the room, with the night still stretching ahead, you both knew that the battle for dominance would continue. But for now, you were content to savor the victory, and the undeniable connection that bound you together.
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An Illicit Affair
Part 22: Blackmail
Pairing: Cillian Murphy (46) x Reader (23)
Warning: Age-Gap, Taboo Relationship, Infidelity
Seeing you with his father, half naked and wrapped up in each other's arms, left him frozen, unable to comprehend what was happening.
"Max," Cillian gasped, quickly pulling away from your embrace and grabbing his discarded t-shirt to cover himself up while you covered your naked breasts with your shirt as well.
"It's not what it looks like Max," you stammered, your cheeks flushed with embarrassment and shame.
Max shook his head, disbelief etched on his features. "No, really?" he drawled sarcastically, his eyes gleaming with anger.
"You both are fucking disgusting," Max spat out, his voice trembling with emotion.
"Max, please. Listen to me," Cillian began but was cut off by the wrath that had taken hold of Max.
"Shut up dad. Just shut the fuck up," Max shouted, shaking his head. "How could you do this to mom? And me?" he asked, frustration and hurt evident in his voice.
"Max, it's not like that," Cillian tried to explain, the guilt already making a home in his chest.
"Seriously?" Max faught back tears. "So, you are not sleeping with my girlfriend, because it sure looks like you are," Max snapped, anger lacing through his words.
The room was silent for a moment, the tension between them palpable as they tried to navigate through the mess they had created.
You looked at Cillian, pleading for him to explain, to rectify this situation before it spiraled out of control but Cillian's expression was unreadable as he grappled with the situation.
"Max, I am not your girlfriend and haven't been for quite some time," you said quietly, your voice trembling as you spoke the words out loud. "This just happened, coincidently and," you began to say, trying to justify your actions but Max shook his head in anger.
"You just happened to fuck my dad? Seriously?" Max spat out, anger lacing through his words. "You finished with me and moved on to my fucking father who, I may add, is fucking married, you goddamn slut," Max yelled, the last word hanging heavy in the air as he stormed out of the apartment, leaving you gob smacked.
"You are both dead to me," he finally shouted, slamming the door as he left.
You felt the weight of his words press down on you, guilt clinging to your chest like a vice.
The room seemed to close in around you, and you felt as though you might suffocate under the impending doom of what was to come.
"I have to talk to Max," Cillian whispered and you nodded.
"Okay, I will go," you said as you gathered your clothes, quickly getting dressed as you fought the urge to cry. The damage was done. The truth was out and it would never be undone.
With a heavy heart, you left Cillian's penthouse, the cold London night seeping into your bones as you hailed a taxi, desperate to disappear. The weight of your actions settled on your shoulders, the guilt threatened to suffocate you.
Max was the last person you wanted to hurt, but you had grown close to Cillian in recent weeks, and one thing had led to another.
You were deeply in love with him, and in turn, Cillian had fallen for you. You had naively assumed that Max wouldn't find out about the affair, but now that he did, you knew that things would never be the same again.
As you rode away in the taxi, the weight of what had happened settled in your stomach like a lead ball. You had always prided yourself on being responsible and mature, but now you felt like a foolish child who had acted on impulse without thinking about the consequences.
As you stared out of the taxi window, your mind raced with thoughts of Max and Cillian and then, suddenly, your phone buzzed.
It was a number unknown from you, sending you several photographs of the evening that you had shared with Cillian. Horrified, you realized that they were all intimate photographs, all of which you knew neither of you took.
In one of them, you were naked and on top of him, your back arched amid screams of ecstasy. In another one, he nibbled your ear while thrusting from below.
Your heart dropped as you stared at the images, fear creeping in to highlights the anxiety you were already experiencing.
Who would send such intimate photographs to you? And how did they obtain these images to begin with?
With trembling hands, you typed out a response, demanding to know how they obtained your private moments.
The quick reply sent chills down your spine.
"Stay away or these will go viral," the message pressed, as your heart skipped a beat.
You tried to swallow the dread and immediately tried to dial Cillian's number.
You waited anxiously as the phone rang. Once, twice, three times, and just as you were about to give up and let the tears come, Cillian answered, his voice unusually shaky.
"Oh, thank God, Cillian," you breathed, your voice a relieved whisper, the words rushing out in a torrent. "Someone just sent me photographs."
Cillian fell silent, but you could almost hear the gears turning in his head. "What kind of photographs?" he finally asked, his voice tense.
"Intimate ones of us, Cillian," you replied, the dread in your voice evident, even to yourself. "There is a camera somewhere inside your bedroom," you told him, your mind racing as you struggled to figure out what to do, how to proceed. You could almost picture Cillian's face, the shock, the pure, raw alarm at realizing that he had not only betrayed his wife but also compromised his reputation and the relationship with Max.
"What?" he gasped, the pure, raw alarm in his voice unmistakable as realization set in. "No, no. This isn't happening. It can't be." Those were the thoughts running through Cillian's mind as he tried to process the information you had just told him over the phone. It was like a bad dream, the kind where everything spirals out of control and no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to wake up.
"Who sent you the photos?" Cillian demanded; his tone urgent as panic began to seep in.
"I don't know," you admitted, your voice shaking as you tried to hold yourself together. "I never received any correspondence from this number before, but the person is threatening to release them if I don't stay away from you."
Cillian fell silent for a moment, his mind racing as he tried to piece together what this all meant. "Can you read the number out to me?" he then asked, suspecting his wife Danielle as the blackmailer behind this vicious scheme.
The thought of Danielle's hand in this drove a sharp dagger of cold dread into the pit of Cillian's stomach. He'd never imagined she would stoop so low. All these years of secrets, deceit, and shared pain remained bottled up within their troubled marriage's walls but now things were about to become even more heated than before.
You read out the number to him and, indeed, it was his wife who had sent you the photographs, which were screenshots from the videos recorded by a hidden camera in his penthouse.
"We can't have this photos come out in public, Cillian. I will never get a job anywhere if this happens," you said, your voice quivering in fear.
Cillian let out a long, deep sigh, acknowledging the dreadful situation they had found themselves in. Putting his career and pride aside, he understood the magnitude of the consequences you would face if these images ever became public.
"Listen to me, Y/N. We will handle this," Cillian said in the most soothing tone he could muster. "But I need to calm Max down first, so please, give me some time to speak with him," Cillian told you, knowing very well now that his mother, Danielle, had set him up to find you in this rather uncompromising condition.
"I know," you sighed, a heavy weight settling onto your shoulders as tears threatened to spill over.
"Just hang in there, okay? I'm going to take care of Max and then we will figure out what to do about the blackmail situation," he reassured you, a small spark of hope flickering in the depths of your heart.
"Okay," you said nervously, and Cillian could almost hear you trembling, a suppressed sob catching in your throat as you hang up your phone with a quiet goodbye.
He knew that you were frightened. Terrified about the photographs and the fear of them being made public. He was scared too, not for the backlash these images might bring about for his career, but for the damage they might cause you.
For the tears you might shed and the brokenness that you might end up with. It made no difference that you loved each other, given this current state of affairs; there was nothing in this moment that he could do to make it right and you both knew that, at least for now, you had to play this safe. You had to stay away from each other.
It was the only option, the only viable answer. The both of you had integrated your lives so much; the problem was that no one else could know about it. You longed for this whole mess to dissolve away and somehow return to what you two used to have. And although the affair had begun with carnal desires, it blossomed into something more profound both of you didn't consider possible.
But it was also something neither of you could sustain right now, given the circumstances, and you knew you needed to protect Cillian's career, his family, and your own future.
As you ended the call, you rest your forehead on your hand, tracing with your fingertips the gentle curve of your jaw and the silken skin of your cheek, a thousand thoughts racing through your mind like a mad torrent.
You had fallen in love with a man you could not possibly have, thrown the dice and rolled the snakes' eye. The outcome could have only led you to this giant mess you were in now and as you watched the city lights dilute with tears, dread struck at once.
To be continued...
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#cillian murphy#cillian murphy smut#cillian murphy x reader#cillian murphy x y/n#cillian murphy imagine#cillian murphy x you#cillian murphy fanfic#cillian murphy fanfiction#cillian murphy fic
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Oasis in a Desperate Land of Dark Desire - Part Two: Settling is Subjective
Cillian Murphy as J. Robert Oppenheimer x Female Wife Reader NSFW 18+ only
Summary: It's only the second day in Los Alamos and while your husband is trying on being part of the uniformed men, you track down the suspicious phone call and unfortunately end up with a tidbit of information that is upsetting.
Word Count: ~4,608
Warnings: Light smut (fingering), age gap, period stereotypical gender roles, mentions of infidelity, marital angst, and drunkenness
See previous for all disclaimers, this is NOT based completely on real life historical accuracy and is essentially fantasy/fiction with Cillian as Oppenheimer.
Part One here
Tag List: @forgottenpeakywriter, @frozenhuntress67, @immyowndefender, @szde8-blog, @bypurple
Thanks to everyone who has liked so far. If you would like to be part of the tag list, drop a comment and I'll add you!
When you awoke from a deep slumber the next morning, the bright sunlight filtering in from the open curtained window was beaming you right in the eyeballs, forcing you to squint and shield your face before sitting up and seeing the empty wrinkled sheet space beside you indicating that Robert had already left early. You sighed, dragging yourself out of bed with a groan from vaginal soreness of last night's escapade and went across the hall to use the bathroom and clean up some, dressing and applying the usual makeup and brushing out your tangled hair, as well as clean out the bathtub. After a light breakfast in the kitchen consisting of two slices of buttered toast with jam and a glass of milk, you went back to the bedroom to pluck up the leftover discarded clothes and shoes still littering the floor. You put Robert's belt into the closet with his shoes and your heels, and took the rest to the bathroom along with the sheets you tugged off the bed, bringing it all into the bathroom sink to thoroughly scrub at the stains in the linens and the memory of last night was making you smile despite your misgivings.
You went out to clip the washed fabrics up onto the clothesline you had established yesterday in the yard and as your fingers fumbled with the wooden clothespins, the warm airy breeze was making the soaking wet fabrics spray a light mist into your face when you suddenly heard a sharp woman's voice behind you, startling your concentration.
"Well, don't you have the easiest job in the whole world."
You whipped around to see one of the scientist's wifes, her hair up in a bun and arms crossed defensively against her chest as she surveyed your laundry.
"May I help you?" you asked her, not pleased that she had just decided to walk right onto the property without permission or invitation. Was that going to be the norm around here, a complete lack of respect for privacy?
The woman shifted, narrowing her eyes briefly before glancing away and back to you.
"You know what I'm talking about," she said knowingly with unnecessary snippiness to her voice and you felt a frown creasing your forehead.
"No, I'm afraid I actually do not. Why are you here?"
She smiled, but it was really a grimace more than anything else with the way she bared her teeth.
"You're married to Dr. Robert fucking Oppenheimer," she stated and you blinked, stunned at her vulgarity.
"Excuse me? I am, indeed, but what is that to you?"
But she had already turned away and began walking out of the yard down the pathway and you shook your head, utterly perplexed and borderline insulted, but you figured it wasn't worth getting into a confrontational fight over when you weren't even sure what exactly her issue was. You hoped that this wasn't a sign that the welcoming nature of the other wives could somehow be diminishing, and you were at risk of bizarrely becoming an outsider among everybody else here in this pop-up town just because of Robert's higher status. You had expected to be respected for being Dr. Oppenheimer's wife at the very least, but you did not want to be seen as pompously prestigious to foster any sort of jealousy or spite, and more to find common ground in general with these other women for they were in the same proverbial ship here. If that lady had a bone to pick because of your husband, then that was her problem, not yours.
The next time you saw Robert was when you went on a self-guided tour of the town, taking in the army's quarters, main mess hall, many outbuildings, offices, and schoolhouse still in construction. You were walking towards the army offices when he came bursting out a door, leading the way of a small pack of men, including friend Isidor Rabi and General Groves himself. You bit back a smile at how dwarfed in size Robert appeared when compared to those taller, bulkier men and your eyebrows bolted upward in surprise upon seeing his own tightly conforming uniform. The other men started to file inside another building and you approached him with a quirked eyebrow.
"You enlisted?" you asked and he gave a vigorous nod.
"They think it would be prudent for all of us civilian men to join the Army efforts and I could be of such importance," he replied sincerely, but you saw through his posturing.
"Do you want to or is the General making you?"
He didn't answer and you guessed the latter as he glanced away and then settled back to you.
"Come here for a minute," he muttered, pulling you aside and whisking you in a quick movement inside the building and into a small empty office, and you started to speak in confusion, but he clapped a hand over your mouth, kicking the door closed behind him. You stared as he slowly lowered his palm and you whispered, feeling as though something were wrong.
"What is this about?"
Wordlessly, he traced a finger along the waistband of your skirt and raised his eyebrows flirtatiously, creasing his forehead with fine age lines.
"What do you think?" he murmured and you knew he meant his attire.
"I kind of find it rather handsome, I suppose," you answered with a smirk and smoothing down his front breast of the stiff dark mossy green fabric, catching your fingertips on the brass buttons and playfully tugging at the buckle around his waist. His eyes widened with a gleam and he yanked your skirt out towards him to thrust an arm down into your panties, anxious to feel you. Gasping, you clutched at his shoulders and went in to kiss him as he pressed a single finger to your slit, squirming past the moist fleshy opening and you gave a light moan of delight as he felt your clit.
"How are you so wet already?" he mumbled into your ear and you gave a breathy laugh, realizing how aroused you were indeed getting.
"Maybe there's just something about a uniformed man," you whispered back to his ear and he gave a fast kiss on your lips while probing in further, expanding his reach with two fingers and letting your fluids naturally lubricate his easy efforts in.
"Sir, we've got a head count of eighteen, nineteen once Dr. Oppenheimer joins us..."
You both froze at a man's voice just outside the door and your heart began to pick up pace in fear, as though what you and Robert were doing was illegally incriminating, even though he was only your husband after all, but if someone discovered you hiding out with the scientific director of the Manhattan Project in the process of giving you a handjob in the middle of a workday, that wouldn't be a good look of professionalism at all, especially if (God forbid) Groves found out about it. But Robert wasn't spooked too easily and he hit that sweet spot inside you, causing you to whimper like a puppy from the breaching orgasm, clinging onto his uniform as though your life depended on it.
"Shh..." He placed his free hand to your lips and your back arched with pleasure, relishing the feel of his fingers up in your walls.
"Rob-"
He cut you off, forcing the back of your head forward to press your face against his shoulder and you lightly bit into the uniform, preventing an embarrassing audible noise from alerting the entire building.
"That didn't take very long," he observed in a whisper as you wound down from the peaking high of the quick orgasm and gasped when close footsteps commenced right outside. Robert pulled his hand slick with your cum out and wiped it clean with a handkerchief from his pocket before quickly detaching from you and swinging the door wide open.
"Wait!" you hissed, snatching his coattails as he began to move out the door and he stopped, spinning around with intensity.
"Duty calls," he told you sternly and you shook your head, wetting your lips.
"No, I know that, but I wanted to ask about that phone call - if the phone call, if you-"
"It was taken care of," he replied crisply, not quite looking at you (giving a flash of skepticism and doubt) but then he put on a yearning glance that flickered darkly downward and that distracted you, triggering another ripple of arousal shooting through your core, proving the fact that your libido was in full force today. You hated to see Robert leave, but men were approaching and he exited to join them. You briskly hitched up your panties and skirt before taking a single calming breath and walking out as though nothing provocative had just occurred. The men were filing out into the road and getting in various militarized vehicles while Groves was barking to Robert about scouting out more acreage. You pretended to ignore them, making distance, but unfortunately there was one person who lagging behind long enough to take notice of you hurrying out the side door and that was Officer Nichols. You nodded politely and told him "good afternoon" but it was perhaps too falsely cheery because his eyes behind his round glasses narrowed and the smile he gave you was stretched in suspicion. You moved fast down the sidewalk, not daring a glance backwards, and made your way back home.
The rest of day passed slowly and you occupied yourself with finishing up organizing the house and shelving Robert's many books while trying not to feel the stifling housewife effect, but more so than that was you couldn't shake a nagging persistence related to that phone call and so, around five o'clock, you marched into the main office where the secretary gave you a look of recognition as she put down the phone.
"Oh, hello, Mrs. Oppenheimer. Are you looking for your husband?"
Her tone made you almost want to cringe as you realized the fact that she was older than you, making you feel as though you probably looked less like a marital partner and more like a mistress.
"Actually, I was wondering about a phone call received sometime yesterday for said husband?"
The secretary pursed her lips and that micro action told you she knew about it.
"I'm afraid all phone calls going in and out are classified information that you do not have access to unless you are given override."
"Well, is there someone else I can talk to about this?"
"It would be unwise to involve anyone else besides me," she replied shortly and you felt a bit annoyed that she was taking this job of being "gatekeeper to Los Alamos" seriously, even though it was indeed her job. You bent over the desk, getting closer and clasping your hands calmly together, speaking with a pleading smile as you glanced to her own wedding ring.
"Please, as one wife to another, how about just a little disclosure between you and me? You must have overheard or took the call...?"
She seemed nervous and blinked a few times before shaking her head and you leaned back, disappointed.
"So how are you settling in? Is there anything I can get for you?" she suddenly asked in a change of tone and you sighed, realizing this was getting nowhere.
"I'm doing fine, thank you. I should start thinking about cooking up a meal for dinner in fact."
"Need a recipe? I swear by this brown sugar meatloaf," she said, raising her eyebrows knowingly as if giving you vital information.
"Oh, alright. Sure," you replied in surprise, even though you already knew how to cook meatloaf and did it many times before, but she grabbed a notepad, scribbling down something with a black ballpoint pen on the top slip of paper before handing it to you folded up in a creased square.
"Enjoy," she said dryly and you stepped away, feeling a bit confused, but you accepted it and tucked it into your purse, giving her a forced smile and walking away, wondering if you might have just been handed something that wasn't pertaining to meatloaf.
When you were in the secluded space of the bedroom at home, you took it out and unfolded it, the lined paper crinkling in your grasp as you read a hastily jotted message.
"Jean, I just can't get up and leave right now, you know that. Stay where you are and don't come looking, don't converse and write to anyone about me. I promise this will be only temporary. What? Yes, of course I still love and miss you, I do."
You crunched the note in your hands and without thinking much further about it, promptly burned it up in the bathroom trashcan with the flame from your cigarette lighter, letting it become mere ashes sprinkling the bottom. Kudos to that secretary with attentive ears and a keen memory, but the last you needed was someone finding out about this. God, was anyone else aware of what he said? Teary, you turned away, catching your upset reflection in the mirror and even the light layer of makeup couldn't cover your exhaustion and frustration, making you appear older than you felt.
"It was taken care of."
He had presumably called her this morning to tell her he missed her already. And he still loved her?
You didn't have a problem with him associating with Jean in a platonic sense if you happened to be back in Berkeley, but of course that was not what this was about. Robert was unfortunately turning out to be one of those men who just couldn't settle down and you supposed you shouldn't be too surprised given his pattern of womanizing, but it was much worse and serious in this location where stakes were very high, so like an unwanted wild rose growing out of proportion, this had to be nipped in the bud.
A couple hours later and after you had eaten dinner alone - a sloppy meal of macaroni and cheese with a full glass of red wine was the best you could muster - and you heard Robert walking to front door step outside, you went to aggressively pull it open, about to be utterly interrogative until you saw his oddly hurt expression, also taking in that his military uniform was gone and replaced with his usual suit and tie attire with a K-6 security clearance button pinned smartly to his gray blazer.
"What happened to your uniform?" you asked before anything else, skirting around the real problems.
"I returned it; I failed the physical requirements, and Isidor convinced me that I looked absurd and am better suited as myself," he replied, impatiently dismissive, and you shrugged nonchalantly.
"He's probably right. You are worth your weight as a scientist, not as a soldier."
"You stopped by the office today," he said, abruptly changing topic with an accusatory tone that you yourself had planned on using, and you tightened, clenching the doorknob stressfully.
"Who told you?"
"Nevermind that. Tell me, why did you speak to my secretary?"
You did not like feeling put on the spot, so you deflected and counter questioned him instead.
"You lied to me earlier about claiming it was taken care of, didn't you? I was right last night about who the phone call was from, wasn't I? You contacted her today when you know how risky it is for outside contacts, not to mention that we just arrived here yesterday. Are you out of your right mind?"
He gave a warning look with resignation and stepped into the house, gently pushing you off to the side. You followed him to the kitchen and took up the wine glass, swigging down the rest as he grimaced, glancing off to the dwindling bottle of uncorked wine next to the cheese encrusted mess you had left on the counter in the form of a dirty pot with the plate haphazardly resting in the sink.
"I see you made dinner for one," he observed and you poured out the rest of the wine into your glass, hovering by the table and taking numerous sips.
"Imagine that, I sincerely hope you weren't starving," you told him sarcastically and he scowled, reflexively reaching for a cigarette.
"I don't want to find out secondhand information from others, so I'd like to hear what happened today in the office and why you are acting like this," he said around the cigarette in his mouth and you snorted, almost amused.
"Oh, what does it matter?"
"It's my personal business, so yes, it matters very much."
Maybe it was the alcohol affecting your already soured mood, but you found yourself choking up on tears and angrily whisper-shouting at him, your voice all high pitched and shaky.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! She's not here, she won't ever be, and we are in a state of high security! You have to stop thinking about her, calling her, lying to me and-"
"This isn't as dramatic as you are making it," he interrupted placidly, but this only spurred you on.
"Oh, really?! I'm not the one violating security and calling a Communist ex-girlfriend from another state while on a classified government sanctioned project! You are the sole issue here, Robert!"
"Stop. Let's not fight," he ordered, grasping your arm and leading you away from the counter and the empty wine bottle.
"I have no desire to be unfaithful to you. Jean contacted me first and I just had to reassure her I was alright because she was worried; she has seen men likely from the FBI tailing her outside her apartment and she is justifiably concerned for her own safety and for mine being so far away."
You pushed aside the tiny piece of worry you had for her and bit back at him coldly.
"I see. Well, why don't you call up Katherine while you're at it and tell her you haven't vanished off the face of the earth because these women cannot bear a day not knowing your exact existence?"
Robert glanced down at his shoes, speaking bitterly.
"She would not want to hear from me."
"Because you wouldn't marry her unless she had a child of yours. Would you have a baby with Jean if given the chance?!"
He blinked, taking in your appearance like he'd just seen you for the first time.
"What is the matter with you tonight? This is not about procreation with anyone and why have you become so devoutly anti any political and ideological affiliations?"
You swallowed and licked your lips clean of the wine stains and refused to answer, but he knew you well enough to get an understanding of your silent expressions.
"This is not a matter of my ties to controversy, but about my feminine associations only, isn't it?"
"I, I just don't want any trouble," you admitted as you waved your hand still holding the glass and it slipped right out of your fingers, nosily crashing to the floor.
"Oh, fuck," you swore, stepping away from the splattered glass and sucking a breath in as Robert stood still, staring from the floor up to your flushed face.
"Perhaps I should lock up the liquor cabinet tonight if this is any indicator. How many drinks did you get into?" he asked scoldingly.
"Stop treating me as if I'm a fucking child," you spat out, taking one step back from him.
"I never said you were, but I'm well aware that Kitty has a similar problem when she gets upset; it accelerates already induced negative emotions and even worse so here due to the altitude, I believe it-"
"Don't you dare equate me to HER!" you practically shrieked, backing away into a chair as he came forth, concern and fright sparking in his eyes. You shook your head furiously, shaking up your perception of the slightly blurry kitchen and gulping air before your next verbal assault at him.
"God, you're such a mess, Robert! You just can't stop reminding me and how many more women are going to come out of the woodwork while we're living here?"
"I have cut my ties to all former affairs, you know that. I told you the day we became engaged, but Jean and Kitty are taking longer to rinse out of my personal contacts."
"Speaking of rinsing, I washed the sheets this morning and I need to bring them in, so excuse me," you declared, really needing fresh air more than anything at the moment, so you stumbled out the back door to retrieve such items from the clothesline. You wiped your eyes and took gulping breaths to calm your racing heartbeat and to get ahold of your emotions that were misfiring all at once... Maybe you had drank too much wine, you sure felt terribly psychologically unsteady. You fell down to your knees on the grass and put your aching head to the bundle of dry sheets and few clothes from yesterday, willing this to pass and wishing you had never gone to the office today and left everything as it was. Ignorance wasn't bliss, but at least it made information ignorable unlike knowledge which burned persistently in your brain until you threw water on the emotions stemming from the paining scorch. Maybe you were overreacting and too young, but Christ, being compared to his other women made it feel worse. There was no way to have a symbiotic relationship with him when he had them parasitically clinging on; you couldn't compete with a woman like Katherine, who was closer to Robert's age and unapproachable, while Jean was a known Communist who knew some of your friends. It all felt too... personal.
When you finally stood up once your head stopped pounding enough to come back inside, stepping around the broken glass and spilled bit of wine that you'd end up cleaning later, Robert had moved to the lounge and was smoking a cigarette while lying back on the sofa, his feet propped up on the coffee table. He gazed at you carefully and cautiously as you stopped in front of him and spoke businesslike, struggling to retain what was left of your composure.
"A woman came around this morning unannounced and you know what-what she told me?"
He stared through the haze of smoke, wearing soft curiosity as you took another deep breath.
"She... She told me I should consider myself to have the easiest job in the world and that is to be married to - and I quote - 'Dr. Robert fucking Oppenheimer'."
He had little reaction other than raised eyebrows in amusement and he lowered the cigarette, gesturing at you with it.
"Do you feel that way? Am I a good occupation for you?"
You scoffed, striding out of the room with the bundle of sheets and clothing in your arms.
"Not a chance after today," you called back over your shoulder, making your way to the bedroom. You tucked the sheets in, making the bed when the sound of an audible sigh from the doorway made you turn reluctantly.
"We can't go on like this, it hasn't even been a week and already we're fracturing our unity and trust. You aren't taking to Los Alamos very well," he said gently and you deflated in the truth, sinking down on the bed as he walked over to accompany you.
"No more phone calls," you instructed him firmly when he settled next to you, wrapping an arm around your waist.
"No suspicious calls, I promise. You are beginning to sound a lot like Leslie Groves."
You sat up straighter and attempted to imitate the General's gruff voice, glaring at him forebodingly.
"Robert, you'll do what I tell you because this fucking important! Otherwise, I'll have to rip that phone right off its cord and jam it up your ass to stop you from jeopardizing national security."
"Yes, ma'am." He was taken aback by this threatening proclamation, yet smiled in good humor, but you then grew more somber and back to your normal voice.
"I'm just tired of feeling as though I am in a competition even being married. I tell you, if I hear any further word about certain past lovers, I will be confiscating every single cigarette you have."
His eyes widened and another smile tugged at his lips as he took your hand, placing it in his lap and rubbing circles into your faint blue veins.
"I would surely not last a full day if you did that to me."
"Then don't make me."
He leaned in and kissed you swiftly, his tongue brushing past your lips and finding its well worn way in, intertwining with your own still doused in the taste of wine. You pulled away and laid back on the bed with him falling down beside you a second later, body relaxing. The palm of his right hand found your stomach that he gently patted affectionately.
"Forgive the off topic inquiry, but do you think you'll end up bearing fruit one of our years here?" He spoke in equal parts trepidation and hushed anticipation.
"I don't know," you murmured, unhappy he was bringing this up.
"I can arrange for a medical assessment, we have some very best doctors on staff..."
You groaned softly, shutting your eyes to the ceiling.
"No... I don't want to officially find out that I could be rarely infertile in any capacity."
"We don't know that for certain; naturally you are biologically and physically healthy, but out of an abundance of caution, I was only thinking-"
"You are always thinking, too much to a fault in fact. If we are meant to have a baby, then it will happen in its own time. However, I am not racing for it to come into creation here of all places, though, and if that means we have to pump the brakes on our active intercourse, then so be it."
He smiled in some relief, leaning over and kissing you again, his fingers weaving into your hair affectionately.
"I'm in no hurry for such a distraction either and I trust your instincts over my own brain on this one," Robert whispered as he caressed your cheek and leaned back lazily to gaze fondly.
"As you should," you teased with a mutter, but you echoed his unspoken thoughts that were not in favor of becoming a father soon when there was too much on his mind with the work here. Worse, you couldn't help but privately wonder if he would even be adept at being a father... When you tested positive for pregnancy for the first time and disclosed the news to him, you remembered how his face flickered from surprise to guilt to hesitant joy. You had kept it only between him and the doctor, which turned out to be good because you ended losing the fetus anyway in less than three months. Robert hadn't been exactly upset, but you had because it catapulted into existential questions, but he and the physician had assured you were fine and there was still plenty of time. For now though, you decided, it was too early to try out the theory of parenthood.
The bed springs lightly creaked as Robert sat up and left, mentioning he wanted to get a drink and read one of his books quietly by himself for awhile before bed and you were left to lay in the growing darkness, contemplating over what the rest of this interesting first week could bring.
Thanks for reading and I appreciate the patience as I work on this story more ❤️
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