#multiple sclerosis cw

[crispycreambacon]

It's the little blue guy himself!

[angryjojofrog]

"Will you take me out on a date after i recover?"

After TillT fell ill because the death of his mother, as well as the responsibility as the CEO, were too much to handle, Ascalpelus swore to visit him at the hospital every day to support him

At this point they both already knew they have feeling for each other but never verbalized it, despite flirting with each other and holding each other's hand

They did eventually go on a date as you can see :]

GIRLS!!!!

[michellemisfit]

It’s that time again… 🤷🏽‍♂️🛌💤

[ef-1]

within the measure of a day | june

[necarion]

This is really cool, and I hope it works. It could also be a fantastic boon for anyone suffering from severe allergies.

On the bioweapon spec, I think this one is probably not as big an issue. I'd assume that getting the anti-immune response is pretty targeted for this treatment so it's hard to get more generally for immune memory against other diseases. And also, there are easier ways of causing problems. For however little comfort that provides...

Holy shit.

Researchers at the University of Chicago have been able to create an ‘inverse vaccine’ that can remove the immune systems memory of specific molecules.

Reading that, sounds like a horrendous bio weapon in the making. But the plan is for it to be used to treat autoimmune diseases like multiple sclerosis, type one diabetes and rheumatoid arthritis.

This was already proven to be able to prevent autoimmunity but the new work shows it can be used to treat ongoing autoimmune issues.

Source.

[due4amiracle]

Do you feel cold and lost in desperation?

You build up hope, but failure's all you've known Remember all the sadness and frustration And let it go Let it go

Well. That was an interesting swing about.

Tuesday - Appointment with my Psych. We started on a medicinal journey (or so he says). Dropped my Prozac and halved my Wellbutrin - and put me on Clomipramine. It's to help with my OCD, so hopefully. Hopefully it's good. Of course, of course, it's still in for a prior-auth with my insurance and, well. i was supposed to stop my Prozac. i started spiraling because of the next item on the list, and it only got worse. (i restarted the Prozac so things are looking back up. -_-)

The car - after my appointment, Sir went out to go do a little shopping and the car wouldn't start. It attempted to turn over, but it just didn't do anything. So we got into contact with the local auto shop and they said they'd come get it - Friday. Sigh. Which means they won't look at it until Monday.

Wednesday - TTRPG! We did Madoka things, it was lovely. Tbf it was only rolling dice for upgrades and whatnot, but still, it had been a month. So that was nice.

Thursday - i had a thing with my insurance (healthy home visit) that i did telehealth, so that was a thing. Granted, they called Two Hours Early but that's fine. That's fine. i just wasn't ready. >_< Had to scramble around for all my medicines so i could report them all (which is ridiculous considering they were attached to my insurance so they should just have a fucking list why am i repeating all of the things on your damn screen?????) Blargh.

Thursday was also my worst day, honestly. i was very deep in the muck and Sir and i had a misunderstanding but we figured things out. It was alright.

Friday nothing really happened, they came and got the car, that was about it.

Then today we did DnD and that was fun.

i read:

A Gathering of Shadows (Shades of Magic #2) V.E. Schwab - 3/5⭐ i enjoyed it quite a bit, the ending was very good.

Starter Villain by John Scalzi - 4.5/5⭐ SCALZI DOES IT AGAIN i love this book so much, it hits all the right notes!

Fireborne (The Aurelian Cycle #1) by Rosaria Munda 4/5⭐ THIS is the book i wanted Fourth Wing to be. It did everything right, things made sense, and oh fuck i can't wait to continue reading!

and am currently reading:

I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me by Jamison Shea

[gwydionmisha]

CW: Child Abuse

[college-girl199328]

The red carpet walk at the Choice Awards will be a special one. The Dead to Me star, 51, who won best actress in a comedy series at the awards ceremony, shared that the show will be the first she's attended since she revealed in 2021 that she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis (MS).

She thanked everyone for the nomination in another tweet the day before! I have been a proud member of this union since 1975. I've had an incredibly hard year, and today this made me smile. Much love to my peers and to my sweet friend Jean Smart and the other incredible ladies I walk beside.

This year marks her third Choice Award nomination and her third time being nominated for her performance as Jen Harding in Dead to Me. The Netflix series follows the dysfunctional friendship that blossoms between Jen, a widowed real estate agent, and Judy (Linda Cardellini), the eccentric woman she meets in a grief support group. After premiering in 2019, the show returned for its third and final season last year, following a delay due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

Cardellini, 47, praised her co-star as she spoke to PEOPLE on the red carpet of the season 3 premiere in November, noting that it was her decision to continue working through her diagnosis, even though she had every right not to.

Applegate has not let her diagnosis keep her from getting back out there. In October, she shared a photo of some fancy walking stick options for her first event since MS, writing that the objects were now part of my new normal.

The Married with Children alum was later honoured with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in November. Although she noted that she couldn't stand for too long, Applegate made light of her diagnosis in her heartfelt speech.

Applegate has faced other health concerns in the past, including a breast cancer diagnosis in 2008, followed by a double mastectomy; getting her ovaries and fallopian tubes removed due to the BRCA1 gene mutation in 2017; having surgery-induced menopause in 2018; and experiencing struggles with insomnia. The 28th Annual Choice Awards will be held on Sunday, Jan. 15, 2023, with comedian Chelsea Handler hosting the ceremony live on The CW from the Fairmont Century Plaza in Los Angeles at 7 p.m. Eastern time.

[flock-of-cassowaries]

Not sure the multiple sclerosis would have killed me, per se - usually takes a few decades to get there - but it would’ve suuuuuuuucked, and my survival would be highly dependent on the goodwill of my community.

Then again, perhaps the many exciting diseases circulating back then would have provided sufficient enrichment to fully distract my overachieving immune system from the temptation posed by the rare delicacy that is my spine and brain.

I was also incredibly nearsighted (-7.75) until I got my eyes lasered, so I think I would’ve needed to pursue a career in something like weaving or… I don’t know, whatever nuns did.

That said, matronly, domineering older women are kind of my lesbian catnip, so maybe I could make that work.

…and based on my personal history with anorexia, I seem to be surprisingly resilient in the face of near-starvation (dodged some of the really dangerous potential consequences; I’m very fortunate, which I suspect is because some of my ancestors probably weren’t). So. Another plus.

[dragqueenpentheus]

mmmm

[hgeeky]

I like this. I have a few further thoughts on happiness.

I recently read The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck by Mark Manson, and while I wouldn't wholeheartedly recommend it, I did like his point about choosing what problems you want. Everything comes with problems. Which problems are good problems for you? I am content with having the problems associated with having a dog - needing to get up at 7 in the morning, not being able to travel spontaneously, etc (and I will tolerate the problem of having a puppy who loves to chew my arm and my shoes). So now I have a dog! And she's part of why I'm happy. Of course, this is a very positive example. In other cases, circumstances are difficult and all the problems are hard, but when worrying about finding happiness, I think it's helpful to remember that no path leads to zero problems.

My other thought is that it's ok if these steps don't lead to happiness for you. You can be doing everything right on the self-care front and still feel awful. I got hit with a massive wave of depression a couple of years ago, more or less out of nowhere. I opted for anti-depressants, and after a few months of finding the right one and the right dose, it's transformed my emotional landscape from despair to joy. My fundamental outlook on life hasn't really changed, but it's easier to find the good in things and tolerate the difficult things, and easier to put effort into things. I now suspect that this depression is a symptom of damage to my brain from my Multiple Sclerosis (diagnosed this year but likely started in 2020 or 2021), rather than something coming from my life. It's possible for physical issues to affect your mood, and I hope you have good medical professionals available to help you explore that if that's what might be happening to you.

i think a lot of people are unhappy because they thing happiness is something that people find or consume rather than something they have to be an active participant in

[honey-tree-evil-eye]

[cleoselene]

With Florida careening toward a probably explosion of this virus, I want to make things clear, guys.

If I contract this virus and it gets bad, I don’t intend to go to the hospital.  I am severely ill.  I have had a migraine nearly every day, nonstop for six months.  I am disabled.  My kind are being denied care and given pain medicine for comfort.  As much as I love pain medicine, I am not going to go somewhere and be told my life is worth less.  I already know it is.  I read stories every day how the disabled are passed over for care in favorite of the able-bodied.

My health is fragile.  Extremely.  I am very compromised, very vulnerable to infection.  If it gets bad.  I’m not sticking around.  Permanently.  It’s not about mental healthy.  It’s about enduring the upper limits of my ability to withstand pain.  I know enough of this disease to know it is like living alone in health.  I don’t plan to go that way, not on top of migraine pain and MS pain.  I’ll stop things before it gets that bad.  

This has nothing to do with mental health.  This is about my people (the disabled community) being declared unworthy of treatment and this is about the fact that I literally cannot physically endure any more pain.  I cry all day.  All day.  Because of the pain.  This is when I’m not vomiting from the pain.  Or sleeping so I don’t have to be aware of it.

I want to go on my own terms.

Suffocating from pneumonia on respirator while migraines ravage my body because my governor and the clown in the Oval Office are responsible?

That ain’t me babe.

[skybound2]

An update on me

*waves* Hello out there tumblr. Last we spoke I briefly mentioned some annoying MS related troubles that are part of the reason I haven't been around as much lately, and said that there would be more on that later. Well it's later, and I feel like whining, so here's an update.

I've spent the last few weeks dealing with some pretty annoying dysthesia in my hands (and parasthesia in other parts of my body like my torso, face, and feet/legs) thanks to the current MS flare both my doctor and I think I'm having (I finally went and got my MRIs this week, so once those are reviewed we will know more). Here's an incomplete list of the things I currently HATE TO TOUCH thanks to the dysthesia:

My hair

Papertowels

Anything but the absolute SOFEST of soft towels

Anything with "easy gripping/anti-slip" ridges on it, such as: pens, my work cellphone case, my steering wheel...

Jeans

Wood handles (like on my kitchen baking utensils)

My PS4 controller

My laptop keyboard

Beyond THAT I just don't like to hold/touch things for very long atm. And FORGOT about scratching an itch!

Basically, the feeling in my hands is a cross between a constant sensation of "pins and needles"/"being asleep" and a constant sensation of a recently burned area of skin that is starting to heal, where the skin is just tight and sensitive and prickly and in need of being submerged in cold water. (Which DOES feel nice actually! Unlike lukewarm or hot water, which is about as pleasant as a hot tub on the sun.)

So... Yeah. Fun!

Despite all of that, I DID manage to get some baking done this morning. (I wasn't sure how I'd feel about touching dough, and I can confidently say that it's not the worst!) But because I wasn't feeling Experimental, all I made was some scones. So here's a pic of my Lemon Rosemary scones, and my Orange Chocolate Walnut scones. Both of which are yum 😊😊

ALSO, I'm on day 40 of daily German Practice on Duolingo!! And I gotta say, for a person such as myself? That leaderboard incentive is an EXCELLENT way to keep me practicing regularly! So, thanks Duolingo!

[fatbottomedgal]

Okay but that panel where the cat is overwhelmed by the thought that they are holding a baby? It hit me so hard.

After I got diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis I put my foot down about ever having children, it was too much of a gamble. People would try to console me and try to get me to change my mind- pregnancy could send me into remission, I have been told, but it might not. However I know of a lot of things that would definitely happen: I would have to go off of about 3 to 5 of my medications and stop my monthly MS treatment, I would have to stop some of my preventative care like routine MRI testing...and then after all of that I would have to, like, be pregnant. And I get told all the time how there's no way to know for sure that I would have a rough pregnancy, and blah blah blah. But even if everything goes smoothly I still have to take care of a baby afterwards, and I may have flares that make it impossible for me to be the best parent I could be.

Op I'm sorry for clogging up your post but that one panel hit me like a sack of bricks, because I have always wanted to be a mom but making the decision to not have kids is the most well thought out decision I've made regarding my chronic illness that gets me the most grief from other people, even people who have MS too. This doesn't get talked about enough, IMHO, and I wanted to share my point of view.

Image description: a five page comic with messy writing and messy line drawings coloured with gouache. Each page has four panels and each panel has a caption and an image. Page one Caption: Mouse and Ruth go for drives a lot. Image: a red car drives down a country road. Caption: to stores and beaches and the dump where you can find cool things. Image: a white mouse looks up at a wall with doll’s heads nailed to it, labeled “wall of dolls”. Caption: I almost never join. Ruth asks, “isn’t My going stir crazy?” Image: a deer is driving a car, and the mouse sits on a pile of pillows on the passenger’s seat. Caption: but I’m so used to this I forget there’s anything to go crazy about Image: an orange cat lies in bed.

Page two Caption: When we lived in Malmö there were weeks I didn’t leave the apartment Image: the cat peeks out a window, looking at a pigeon that’s pooping on the window ledge. Caption: months I didn’t see anyone besides Mouse. I just couldn’t manage the stairs Image: the cat looks down an exaggerated, maze-like staircase. Caption: Mouse wasn’t much better off. I took up indoor “gardening” so we wouldn’t miss nature too much. Of course I often couldn’t water the plants. It felt bitter and symbolic when they died Image: the cat is in a different bed, looking at a house plant on a side table that’s beginning to wilt. Caption: here there’s no stairs and I have plants and bees right outside my window Image: the cat is in the first bed, drawing a comic. There’s a flower, a butterfly and a bee outside the window behind it.

Page three Caption: people tend to get frustrated with my acceptance Image: the cat takes down a half finished painting from an easel. Caption: even after we’ve talked a lot about my illness, they think I should plan ahead as if a cure is right around the corner Image: a rabbit is standing beside a table covered in unfinished canvases, looking at  one of them. The cat stands behind them, looking nervous. Caption: often it’s the same people who respond to tragedies you CAN fix by saying “life’s not fair” Image: the cat is rescuing bugs from drowning in a water barrel and the rabbit looks over its shoulder, looking annoyed. Caption: but when I let go of what I can’t have, they see it as defeat. Image: the cat is curled up and hiding in bed while the rabbit stands over them, frowning, holding the unfinished painting and waving two paintbrushes.

Page four Caption: I understand the impulse to say “maybe some day”. When it’s kindly meant, I value the intention. Image: The rabbit has its arm around the cat’s shoulder and waves towards a thought bubble. In the thought bubble the cat is floating and happy at the end of a rainbow with pink clouds, flowers and a smiling sky in the background. Caption: but few things are more dangerous to my soul than “maybe some day” Image: the cat huddles on the ground and hides its face. Right above the cat, as if pushing down, is a bigger thought bubble with images of the cat looking happy - dancing, being held, proudly painting, holding a baby. Caption: There is no greater wisdom in life than: fix what you can and accept what you can’t. Image: the thought bubble is breaking up and shrinking. The cat is sitting up, smiling at a dandelion beside it. Caption: some times, giving up isn’t just the only way to survive but to thrive, and leave room for joy. Image: The half finished canvases are burning on the ground and the cat walks away without looking back.

Page five Caption: today I’m sad because I’m in pain and I miss moving and doing Image: the cat is crying in bed. Caption: but when I thank God for giving me this life filled with blessings, it’s from the heart. Image: the cat wipes away some tears and looks a little happier. Caption: I am happy more often than not. I mostly cry from gratitude. There is no contradiction Image: the cat closes its eyes and is surrounded by a pink glow and red cartoon hearts. Caption: life will ask me to let go of much bigger things and maybe I can come with to the dump next time Image: the cat looks at the wall of dolls and says: “cool!” End ID. Here’s some disability thoughts I had during my latest flare (hence the wobblier-than-usual lines and messy writing). I hope it makes sense even if I was pretty confused when I made it! I have POTS and ME/CFS, as well as ADHD and being autistic. Accepting the reality of being bed/housebound and hard-of-thinking often is going to be a life long effort but I’m getting there. Happy disability pride month!!! Reblogs are much appreciated! (if you wanna help me live and stuff and make more art and comics I have a Patreon. I post comic pages there on average once a day for the 3€ tier as well as other fun things! Link in my pinned post)

[irresponsible-masochist]

Today was A Day.

My hands. My fucking hands, I hate them. I hate the numbness and tingling and pins and needles and the inability to hold things without dropping them and fucking shaking that makes me want to binge eat...

Let me explain that last one: I did the EDNOS Tango for more than a fucking decade and at the peak of my “I will not eat until I pass out and then I will eat enough to feed three humans and not again for another 3 days” stage, I would get the reactive hypoglycemia that came with not eating; when I am having A Day and I am shaky and unsteady, there is a part of my brain that thinks that that’s what’s happening and I just need to eat until the shaking stops. And I’m over here like “that’s not how it works, brain, this shaking is going to be happening on and off forever, but you got the spirit. Thanks for that, I guess.”

It has been A Day. And I have hated it.

I really hope that whatever treatment I get on helps even a little because I hate days like these.