#much fucking worse but what happened was actually pretty bad and has consequences that will impact me FOREVER. i was a newborn baby and my

[qqueenofhades]

I don’t have any words right now for what’s happened. Where in the fuck do we go from here?

I don't know. I really, truly don't know. We can't sugarcoat how bad things are going to get, and we can't pre-emptively give into it anyway. This is going to be an unprecedented time in American history (if, sadly, not world history) and the forces conspiring to make you obey will gain much of their power from you doing so in advance, without a struggle. It seems fair to say that America as it has always been historically constituted is over, and may not return in our lifetimes, but we also do not know that for a fact. If nothing else, the fascists will find it very hard to cancel competitive elections, and we cannot sit back, throw up our hands, conclude that voting is clearly meaningless, and let them do that. There are a lot of other things that we need to do, but that's one.

There are various postmortems to be written and nits to pick, but Harris was thrown into an impossible situation and did the best she could in 100 days. Even her critics agree she ran a pretty much flawless campaign. But this country simply decided that a well-qualified black woman could not be preferred over the most manifestly and flagrantly unfit degenerate to ever occupy the office. They decided this for many reasons, not least because large swathes of the country now live in curated misinformation bubbles that, under Government Czar Musk, will only get much, much worse. They were helped by the cowardice and complicity of the "mainstream media" that could have ended Trump's career exactly like they did to Biden after the first debate, but chose to preserve the profits of their billionaire oligarch owners and did not do so, giving Trump the benefit of the doubt and normalization at every turn. They also hounded Biden relentlessly over the four years of his presidency, never reported on the good things he did, and drove him to the historically bad approval ratings lows for a president who was by any metric, quite successful (and will quite possibly be our last ordinary American president for a very long time). Along with the searingly ingrained racism and misogyny and misinformation, Harris could not overcome that.

Democrats clearly had a messaging problem, but it's also true that the country, quite simply, does not care about "democracy" when the economy is perceived to be at stake. Not to over-egg the Hitler parallels, but yeah. This is how Hitler returned to power in 1933 -- on the backs of widespread economic collapse of the Weimar Republic; voters decided they just didn't care about the overtly fascist stuff, which he then proceeded to you know, do with genocidal vigor. Except the American economy in this case was actually doing well, which makes it even more baffling and indefensible. Enough people simply memory-holed Trump's crimes (aided at every turn by SCOTUS, Mitch McConnell not convicting him after January 6, Merrick Garland being far too slow and timid, the corporate media), liked the racist fascist behavior or felt that it wasn't a dealbreaker, and decided that in this election, he was the "change" candidate. It's insane by any metric, but that's what happened.

The country is deeply sick. We do not know what will happen. It's going to get bad. Barring a miracle, we will not have federalized abortion rights again in my lifetime, and there will be widespread attacks on public health, women's rights, immigrants, transgender people, and other vulnerable people. Even and especially the ones who voted for Trump. Never Thought Leopard Would Eat My Face, etc. Alito and Thomas will swiftly step down and allow their seats to be replaced by 40-year old wingnuts hand-selected from the worst the Federalist Society has to offer. SCOTUS is gone for the next generation at least. There is very little prospect of it being ever fixed in the foreseeable future.

Trump will never face a scintilla of consequences for his previous crimes; all the open federal cases will be closed as soon as he takes office and fires Jack Smith. The best we can hope for is that he dies in office, but then we get Vance and the cadre of alt-right techno billionaires ruled directly from the Kremlin. Putin is celebrating this morning and with good reason; he's gotten everything he wants. Trump will egg on Netanyahu in Gaza and abandon Ukraine. Democracy across the world will remain even more fragile and badly under threat. Authoritarians will be empowered and American withdrawal from international systems will percolate in very dangerous ways that cannot and will not be fixed in the short run. I really hope all the leftists who celebrate this as the "defeat of the genocide candidate" will enjoy all the genocide and suffering that's about to come. And yes, I do think the Israel-Palestine war fucked us in a large way. Jewish voters perceived the Democrats as insufficiently pro-Israel due to the presence of far-left antisemitism, even as the far left attacked the Democrats relentlessly and never targeted the Republicans. Arab voters abandoned them, possibly deservedly. What would have happened without the war? We don't know. You get the historical period that you get. Netanyahu and Trump can now do anything they want. Hope it was worth it.

As I said, I can't sugarcoat it. We are going to be paying for this in some form for the next decade, and probably longer. I'm not as absolutely shattered as I was in 2016, but I am much, much angrier. We all thought, we all hoped, America was better than this. It isn't. That, however, is something that has also happened before. What we decide to do next will shape how the next chapter unfolds.

This would be a great time to stock up on needed medicines, renew your passport online, and anything else you need to do in preparation for next year. Many of us simply do not have the wherewithal, whether financial or otherwise, to leave the country. I don't know what will happen with me. I don't know what will happen to any of us. This was utterly avoidable and yet, America didn't want to avoid it. At some point, there's nothing else you can do. You can point to media cronyism, Russian influence, etc etc., but the fact that two of the most qualified presidential candidates who happened to be women have now lost to Trump twice makes it unavoidable. The virulent rightward shift of young men (of all races) in particular paints a grim picture as to how the reactionary misogyny of the 21st century is going to essentially undo most of the progress for social and gender equality in the 20th. The patriarchy has been a problem for most of human history. Doesn't really seem like it's going to change.

The end result of this, however grim: we're still here. We are still living within our communities. If (and this is a big if) Democrats can retake the House, they can put some checks on the process for the next two years. At this point, we are in full-out buying-time, trying-to-prevent-the worst mode. We could have continued fixing things, but we won't be doing that. We will only be trying to preserve ourselves and our friends and our smaller spheres of influence. It sounds very trite to say that we have to have courage, but we do. There's not much else.

It's going to be an awful winter. We have two and a half months to see this coming and know how bad it's going to be, and... yeah. I don't know how soon the buyer's remorse will inevitably set in, but it will. Tough luck, people. You voted for him. You get the country that you decide to have. But the rest of us are also here, and what Gandalf says is still true. We wish the Ring had never come to us, we wish none of this had happened, but we still have to decide what to do with the time that is given to us.

I don't have a lot more. I'll probably be logging off for a while. I don't need to look at the internet for.... yeah, a long time. (Will I do it anyway? Probably.) I don't know what else to leave you with, aside from again:

Do not obey in advance. Do not act as if everything is foreordained and set in stone. Fascist regimes end. They always do. We are going to have to figure out how, and it will suck shit, but the alternative is worse.

Take care of yourselves. I love you.

[pepprs]

ok well i had a second breakdown. and i feel a third one coming on

[yuwuta]

hi 👋 bsf upstaging bf with choso???

ok i’ve gotten asks for pretty much every other jjk boy on this subject and i want to say something as an overarching theme: all of them ain’t shit. not a single one of them. there’s a scale, some (gojo) are worse than others, but in general, none of them really give a fuck, if that means upstaging, sabotaging, or straight up kicking your boyfriend to the curb so that they can be your boyfriend instead then so be it. but they’re not shit, NONE OF THEM!! but there is a hierarchy and different methods of execution and all that, so here’s where they stand 

president and ceo of not being shit: satoru gojo

why would satoru care about your boyfriend? in any and all universes, he is raised in a world where consequences mean nothing to him. so what if he’s a little rude to this guy? so what if he buys you a ridiculously expensive birthday gift that might be seen as romantic? so what if he offers to take you on a vacation that happens to overlap with your boyfriend’s birthday? the worst that will happen to satoru is nothing; the world bends to his whims, never the other way around.

it’s a combination of complete self-confidence + trust in you + getting joy out of bothering people that earns him this number one spot. he’s confident in every sense of the word, so he doesn’t see your boyfriend as a threat. even if satoru didn’t love you romantically, he wouldn’t see a boyfriend as a threat to your friendship either, because he has no doubts in himself—and to the second point, he doesn’t have any in you either: you’ve proven your loyalty to satoru, proven that even when he pisses you off, you still love him, even when you’re dating somebody else, you still make time for him, even when he’s being shitty and stubborn, you don’t kick him to the curb, you just pinch his ear and bring him back down to earth. he’s always chosen you, but you’ve always chosen him, too, so again, what’s to fear when a boyfriend is added to the equation? nothing, because satoru knows this guy can’t earn or replace the loyalty you’ve given him. 

and to top it all off, he likes watching your bf grind his teeth. he likes watching this guy have to hold his breath, because what can he say without sounding like an ass—he won’t ask you to tell satoru to fuck off because he hasn’t done anything wrong. treating your best friend to fancy dinners and exotic getaways and designer clothes is just nice when you have money—your bf would be pretty shitty to deny you that. and he��d sound insecure, too. and satoru knows your bf doesn’t have the balls to confront him, and even if he did he’d lose. it’d be embarrassing. so, satoru wins. he always wins. satoru engages in psychological warfare, and he has the physical strength, social power, and financial security to back it up, so he, literally, can never lose. and, sure, having your bf around is annoying, but it’s so much fun to watch other people lose that he lets the guy stick around for a while. you’ll get tired of him and run back to satoru eventually, and he’ll confess this time… hopefully.

vice president: kento nanami

if you expected kento to be lower on this list, think again, because he is just as bad. he’s only second place because he’s not as overt, nor does he wish to actually taunt your boyfriend like satoru would. for kento, you’re just his number one priority. you always have been, ever since you came into his life; it was confusing at first, for him to care so much about you beyond an objective sense of responsibility, but overtime he came to realize that he way he wants to take care of you is different. he doesn’t just want to ensure your comfort and safety physically, he wants to make sure you’re taken care of emotionally, he wants to bear your burdens for you, not just help you through them.

kento is a good friend, a trusted confidant, a reliable person overall, and over the years, he’s inadvertently raised your standards. casual situationships and relationships where you’re not the priority become unappealing when you’ve had someone by your side for so long who’s treated you better than that. if your best friend can buy you flowers, and make reservations at new restaurants, and drive an hour to pick you up in the rain, and cook for you when you’re feeling sick, then why would you tolerate anything less in a romantic partner? these things are the bare minimum to kento, but most other men fall far below average; it’s hard for them to compete where they cannot compare. 

so when you do accept a partner, kento is skeptical at best. he knows that what he does for the people in his life isn’t necessarily special, but he doubts that your boyfriend is capable of doing even that—and even if he does meet the standards, he’ll be outclassed anyway. because kento is a good person, but he’ gotten really good at how to be good to you. your boyfriend might get you flowers, but kento already knows your favorites. your boyfriend might send chocolates, but he doesn’t know which ones you’re allergic to, and the brand you prefer; kento does, which is why the ones he bought for you are gone within the week, and the generic box sent over by your boyfriend was re-gifted to satoru. when you voice your doubts about a date your boyfriend mentioned wanting to plan, kento feigns interest, and then innocence when he asks if you’re busy a few days later, if you’d like to help him bake something instead—something he knows you’d much rather do. the short version is—kento knows you, and he uses it to his advantage. he uses the knowledge gained during your friendship to outclass anybody in your dating pool, and he does it so smoothly that it hardly seems intentional or harmful, but it is. which is why he’s just as bad, if not worse, than satoru. 

treasurer: megumi fushiguro 

there’s actually no au in which megumi isn’t shit because no matter how you square it, he gets it from his daddy. whether he’s raised by just satoru, just toji, or some au where he has them both in his life—the common denominator is that they’re there. if megumi ever did confide in either of them about hating your boyfriend, both satoru and toji would offer the same advice: “can’t you just get rid of him? what’s he got on you?” which is absolutely not how you should parent a child...

megumi might have his doubts about his personality, but he’s never been insecure about his appearance. it’s hard to be when he looks like that, but also when he’s had either toji or satoru (or god forbid, both) in his ear his entire life. he might have some fucked up attachment issues and skepticisms about the general population, but he has a very secure view of himself. so, to start, he’s not impressed by your boyfriend, and is honestly a little offended that you think this guy is objectively more attractive, or that you’re more romantically/sexually attracted to him that you are to megumi—or even, any of your other friends. he’d rather you start dating nobara or yuuji, at least he could live with that because those are pretty people, but your choice in boyfriends… he’s not trying to be mean but you could do better. you’ve done better. 

secondly, megumi…. doesn’t care about him. at all. he’s not like satoru in that it brings him happiness to tease your boyfriend, he’s not like kento in that he skews your standards in his favor to nudge your boyfriend out of the picture; megumi literally does not care if this guy lives or dies. your boyfriend could drop dead and megumi would be like damn… that’s crazy… and move on with his life. which is a wild view to have of your best friend’s partner; and it also drives said partner to madness because why the fuck won’t your childhood friend acknowledge his existence?? but again, megumi doesn’t care that his apathy towards your boyfriend bothers him—megumi doesn’t see him, doesn’t know him, doesn’t care to know him, and it drives a wedge in your relationship. 

thirdly, megumi is, canonically, a bully to people he doesn’t like. if your boyfriend gets angered enough to the point of confronting megumi, or whining to you, then it’s inconsequential to megumi to hurt him, and he won’t hold back. also on the reverse side, if there was a situation in which your boyfriend was getting hurt or needed help, then megumi is not helping. he’d probably just watch, or join in. 

after a while, megumi grows past apathy into exhaustion. he thinks you should do better, he thinks you should know better, he thinks he’s better. and he is. he’ll show you that. (also, he is most likely to try to seduce you into infidelity because he doesn’t care about your boyfriend, so you’re single to him). 

first secretary of not giving a fuck: yuuji itadori 

jealousy is something that yuuji used to feel guilty about, guilty enough to drive him to confiding in satoru/nanami about his feelings and seeking advice for how to deal with it, because he thought being jealous meant that he was being a bad friend to you. but neither of his mentors are shit, so yuuji learns to adopt the age old mantra: all is far in love and war. 

he’s better than satoru in the sense that he doesn’t antagonize your boyfriend, he’s better than kento in the sense that he doesn’t outwardly outclass your boyfriend’s efforts, he’s better than megumi in the sense that he does care about people outside of his immediate circle of friends, and as long as your boyfriend is a human, then yuuji will care about his life; but in all other senses, yuuji is surprisingly neutral, and in some cases, actually worse. 

yuuji has two things to his advantage that he absolutely abuses: his likability, and his strength. when it comes to likability, he can just play the friendly, nice guy card. wrapping his arm around your shoulder, twirling you around in a hug, pinching your cheeks, playing with your hair, laying on your lap—he’s just yuuji, he’s just being friendly, he’s just being nice. it’d be pretty shitty of your boyfriend to tell him to be meaner to you, no? ^.^ yuuji is also sneaky with this in that he uses it to say otherwise mean things under the guise of a friendly disguise, and people rarely think otherwise of it. (“it’s fine if you go to the club with us if your bf doesn’t want you to. it’s not like you’re gonna marry him” “are those boxes giving you trouble, man? not surprising, haha!” “you guys didn’t break up yet? aw... i mean... well, no i meant that, but come on, let’s take shots!” all said with a smile that looks like this 😇😇 on his face)

in terms of strength, it’s an unbeatable challenge for your boyfriend—because even if he gets pissed off at yuuji being too close to you, too affectionate with you, too sweet to you, what’s he gonna do? because he certainly can’t beat yuuji in a fight—he couldn’t even beat yuuji in a race, he couldn’t even beat yuuji at mario kart, so there’s nothing for your boyfriend to do but shutup and wallow.  

second secretary: yuuta okkotsu

does he need an explanation… does mr. “how rude, this is pure love” need an explanation… does mr. “i will kill itadori yuuji myself” need an explanation… does mr. “i won’t let sensei kill his best friend again, [i’ll do it myself]” need an explanation… hasn’t he already proved himself as the single most loyal and contently insane person on the planet… 

once you have yuuta’s loyalty, you have it forever. not even for life, because he’d find a way to transcend space and time to protect you in the next one. even if, for some reason, you didn’t want it anymore, you have it; yuuta’s love is final sale, no exchanges or returns. the only reason he’s not ranked to be worse than megumi or yuuji is because yuuta has one grave disadvantage: he is not normally confrontational, and is the definition of anxious LOL. he’d feel bad if he didn’t make an effort to get to know your boyfriend, but that doesn’t mean he has to like him...

yuuta might know that he has feelings for you, but he’s honestly content with a platonic relationship if that’s how you choose to express it towards him. if you want to be friends, then he’s your friend; your love is that pure and vital to him, that he takes it in whatever form he gets it. he’s desperate for you in a way that has him completely at your whim; he doesn’t need reciprocity to love you, just knowing you, and knowing you accept his love is more than enough. keeping him around as friend, keeping him in your life, keeping him in your mind—that’s all yuuta could truly ever want. so, even when you have a boyfriend, it stings a bit at first, but as long as you still have the same amount of room in your life for yuuta, then he won’t do any harm to this guy. 

unless: (a) your boyfriend makes it difficult for yuuta to have access to you, (b) your boyfriend outrightly ticks yuuta off, or (c) the worst option, your boyfriend does something to hurt you or make you sad, then he’s off yuuta’s radar completely. he won’t confront, and he won’t intervene. but if any of those conditions are not met, even for a second, then your boyfriend is as good as gone and there’s little anyone, yourself included, can do to stop him. 

honorable board members: choso kamo, toji fushiguro, toge inumaki

everything about choso is on sight. it takes one wrong move, the slightest misstep, even a breath out of place and he will end your relationship and your boyfriend’s life if he has to. choso does not play when it comes to the people he loves, he won’t stand for you being hurt or mistreated in any way. there’s no subtle psychological warfare, there’s no shovel talk, there’s no blame game: choso sees something wrong, and he takes it upon himself to correct it. your partners have one chance to treat you right, or they’ll wish they hadn’t met choso to begin with.

toji doesn’t really chase people, but you have always been the exception. he hates to admit it, but he’ll follow you anywhere you go, not caring for whoever else you decide to bring along. if the journey of your life is a car ride, toji always calls shotgun, and he doesn’t really care who else gets in the backseat, until they ask him to get out of his—then there’s a problem. and he’s never once felt bad about turning some guy into a hitchhiker. 

the greater good should be thankful that toge takes a voluntary vow of silence, because if he said even half of the things that were on his mind, the world might, quite literally, be set on fire. toge doesn’t care—not like megumi, him not caring isn’t apathy towards the life or death of other people, he just doesn’t care what reaction his actions pull out of people. you’ve told him it’s annoying when he pinches your cheeks and steals your boba, but that won’t stop him from doing it, esp not when you look so cute when you’re angry. yeah, he knows people get annoyed by his pranks, but that’s whatever. he knows your boyfriend hates when toge’s around you, but he doesn’t care. if it brings toge joy, he’ll do it. honestly, even if it doesn’t bring him joy, he’ll do it because he wants to. he’s not immune to consequences like satoru, he simply doesn’t care about them! he’ll just deal with it, he’s got a high tolerance for it—your boyfriend, however, seems like a weakling, so toge will simply outlast him. he’s outlasted all the others :) 

[butch-reidentified]

I've spoken before about psychopathy, particularly my own, and the importance of recent research and demolishing the stigma and absolutely absurd past conceptions and measures of psychopathy, which were exclusively based on studies of male prisoners convicted of violent crime.

Just to reiterate - psychopathy is not being deranged and uncontrollably violent. Villanelle from Killing Eve is actually an excellent and well-researched example of high-EQ female psychopathy, and the first fictional portrayal I can genuinely see myself in. Psychopaths with high EQ are entirely capable of cognitive empathy, and many (like myself) are actually very gifted in it, and can even make excellent counselors/therapists as a result of this combined with a lack of strong internal biases and the fact that we won't be emotionally impacted/drained by patients. This presentation of psychopathy is becoming more and more recognized and studied, and is distinctly more common in women. We retain the core defining traits, obviously - boldness, deviancy, disinhibition, very high fear threshold, a tendency toward meanness (self-control is a thing, though), reduced capacity for remorse and regret*, and of course lack of affective (emotional) empathy - but are much more able to moderate ourselves and prioritize social functioning, and tend to view the sadistic behavior of low-EQ psychopathic males as wasteful. My wife calls it "prosocial psychopathy."

Anyway, I just kind of wanted to touch on this again since it's been a while and there's a fair few new followers out here. I encourage you to read the above links and check the tag - it's a pretty interesting topic, to me at least.

Edit 4/25/2024: *Regarding the reduced capacity for remorse/regret: I firmly believe this sounds worse than it is. For people like me, at least, it's not that I'm going around doing terrible things and incapable of feeling bad about any of them. The truth is that remorse & regret most frequently occur as a result of intensely emotion-driven behaviors, which as a concept is largely foreign to me - I don't tend toward remorse/regret because the way I interact with the world, analyze situations, and choose to behave in response, is inherently from the very beginning done with the acceptance of potential consequences actively held in my mind. I'm not prone to regret/remorse because I know myself extremely well and make choices as consistent with my understanding of self as possible, having already prepared myself for the possibility that things could go wrong. It's more about being prepared for what might happen and able to cope when things do go wrong, rather than being a piece of shit and not feeling anything about it.

This doesn't make me better or worse than others; it's a neutral fact that male supremacy has made seem otherwise by constantly claiming that "logic" or whatever is superior to emotions. Fuck that. Loads of the best people I've ever known have been very emotion-driven (what non-shit people identify as a form of being passionate) and some of the shittest people I've known would waste their dying breath insisting they're 100% logical creatures, as if that's even a real thing. To me it feels very simple: if I'm making the best (most internally consistent, most reflective of my personality and values, etc) decisions I possibly can with whatever information I have at the time, then I've done my best, acted with integrity, and don't need to regret my choices. This is very challenging to write/talk about bc of the stigma & connotations involved, but again, this is a completely neutral fact to me in the same way I describe being a woman as a completely neutral fact despite the stigma & connotations involved there. Does any of this make sense?

[fanofstuff01]

HERE I AM! Here I am with a little writing of mine!

Before we get started, this AU belongs to @woah-why-i-am-here and they have pretty cool drawings about it. GO CHECK IT OUT!

Considering the show itself is 16+, this is aswell, know it then read this, also it has Valentino.

DEAR TUMBLR! PLEASE DONT TAKE THIS DOWN!

A little summary: Adam fell to hell, needed money, and Valentino was the only one hired him. He owned his soul, and it was too late when Adam realized what he agreed to work on. He is one of Valentino’s top whores now. And of course, Adam and Angel met, in fact, more than ‘met’. Their films sure sell a lot. They slowly become friends and Angel convinces Adam to come to the hotel. This is after these happened. Also not shipping Angel x Adam.

ENJOY! (Also since you love holydust @rius-cave , tagging you!)

“And cut!” Valentino said proudly, ending the scene. “One hour break and we’re here till 8!”

Adam panted as he tried to collect his mind. He slowly backed away from the fish demon gal, wore his robes back and got up to go to his dressing room. This was the third demon he was on top of that day, and sure enough she was not gonna be the last. Today was gonna suck. Val was planning to work on eight fucking movies, not to mention six of them were gay and two of them were with Angel. He was glad the one-hour break came.

“Addie~” He heard someone behind him and felt that certain ‘someone’ gripping his shoulders.

Valentino. Awesome. Just who he needed.

He attempted to not show the fear and hatred he felt to his face and mask. Too bad the fucking thing was programmed to show every emotion on his face, and sometimes they didn’t even needed to be on his face, him feeling them was enough. Angel had a -probably true- theory about it, he thought that it was ‘connected’ to his brain when he wore it. Adam was already regretting that he put the “I will only work with a mask” in his contract. He didn’t like the idea of showing his face on films, but this was much worse. He couldn’t fucking took it off till his shift ended!

“Yes, Val?” He asked, trying to avoid the movements he was doing to his chest. Yes, prick? he corrected himself in his brain.

“You were so, so good in the last one, babe” he chuckled.

“Thank you, Valentino.”

“Go ahead. Rest, baby.” He thought he was gonna leave him, but instead, he leaned in and kissed his cheek, completely disgusting the sinner. He didn’t flinch or resist though, he knew what’d happen if he did. “Oh, I can’t wait to see you and Angie on stage together.” he let out another one of his creepy chuckles and finally let the first man go. Adam almost runned to his dressing room, closed the door behind him and threw himself on the couch.

“Fuuck.” He groaned and tried to grab his wine bottle without getting up.

“Adam?” A familiar voice came from outside.

“Door isn’t locked!” He yelled.

“Hey, dickmaster.” A pink spider demon came inside and sat down beside him, tilted his head back and watched as the demon managed to grab the bottle and drank it without standing up, like his life depended on it.

“Y’know you can choke yourself doin’ that, right?”

“Meh, who the fuck cares.” He get up dazedly and looked inside the bottle with one of his eyes.

“I don’t recommend dying on work hours, Val punishes the ones who do.”

“Unholy shit, that actually happened?!” Adam asked, his pupil-les eyes went wide.

“I saw three accidents.” Angel shrugged. “Any left for me?”

“Sorry, I guess that bitch camera guy sneaked up here again and stole my stash.”

“It’s fine. Wanna eat your food? We’re gonna need energy.” Angel asked and took out two containers out of his bag. “I made lasagna yesterday.”

“Oh, you bet I do then.” He smirked and took his own. Angel knew the best ways to make it.

They chatted together until their break ended.

“Adam! Get your ass here or there will be consequences!” A little window appeared in Adam’s mask, almost like a pop-up ad. It was their costume designer. “And bring Angel with you!”

“Fine, fine! Ugh.” He groaned, swiped the page to make it dissapear and get up. “Who’s idea was putting this shit on this again?” He mumbled to himself. “Let’s go cocksucker, we have another job to do.”

HOW IS IT!?

By the way, Adam’s mask in this is practically based on his original mask, a Voxtech product just for Adam. Like Vox’s screen, it’s like a screen-face.

I’ll continue this

[ominous-horse-noises]

not done talking ab fhjy actually so i'll just say some of you guys who go on about how you could've done better themes and narrative arcs can't even think critically about the one in front of you.

i do wish that the other bad kids had interacted with their foils more this season because it was fun seeing them trade insults, but i also dont think it would've done much for them. i mean, people forget the tbks did try to turn reuben early on (they literally saved him from grix even though it was his fault he showed up trying to kill people). adaine thought oisin was cool and tbks were onboard with thinking maybe he wasn't that bad, and then he sent his grandma to murder them and their entire school. fabian tried to get an 'in' with ivy and it nearly cost him a genuine relationship with a character who had a way better chance of helping them figure things out without the risk of being betrayed. kipperlilly had an ego-driven hateboner for riz since BEFORE the rage stars and killed her own party member in cold blood just to stick it to kristen, and you're telling me that she could've been my little ponyied into giving up her chance to squash the symbol of all her inadequacy? buddy and maryann are the only rat grinders who havent fucked them over meaningfully and guess what? they're not thrilled about having to kill them- they're actively avoiding targeting them! almost like theyre capable of distinguishing between someone not on their side and someone who's proved to be a threat!

brennan made it pretty clear that trying to befriend trgs in their rage forms was futile and actively punished it ingame. you can have your opinions of that, but it definitely had a narrative point: if you get rage starred, you cant be 'this isnt youuuu'd out of it. you think ONLY of rage, and rage can't be reasoned with. it's arguably worse than death, bc at least someone can revivify you and there's no lasting consequences. think about how hard brennan was trying to push the ihs into taking rage tokens. he knew exactly how dire he'd made the consequences and that was on purpose. the season has no stakes if you can just talk your way out of being rage starred bc tbks could save each other easily. the whole climax literally can't happen if trgs arent being evil bc porter can't be a living god of rage without followers. tbks hating trgs isnt a flaw in the story: it IS the story.

[xzaddyzanakinx]

Okay so I have a request 😭 at some point could you PLEASSEEEE make a series where it’s Anakin x reader with bipolar? I’m pretty sure Anakin already suffers from borderline but I personally suffer from bipolar and 1. Could be such good angst , 2. Anakin could literally be insane and the reader would probably want to be around him bc bipolar sometimes craves danger, and 3. I feel like it would be really nice to see Anakin comfort a bipolar reader during a really bad episode where they’re like hysterical and then manic

(I’m so sorry this was so long)

Yes, Anakin has been diagnosed with BPD by many therapists!

That’s part of the reason I love him so much. I also have BPD and I really resonate with him. Because I get it you know? He’s obsessive, he will do ANYTHING for his Favorite Person.

He’d even spill blood.

The way it would pain him so deeply to see his FP in such anguish… he’ll punch a wall and cry about it later but right then he’ll be emotionless, he’d put on the best mask of comfort he could so he could soak up all your pain and take it away.

I got carried away. Oops. Warnings: inner monologue of: Self pity, gaslighting, verbal abuse, depression, self deprecation, co-dependency, death/suicide

He’d be so strong and solid for you because you need him, but internally he’d be shattered. What if he caused your episode? What if you leave him some day when you’re manic and feral for change no matter what the consequences are? What if you never loved him in the first place and he made it all up and somehow you’ve just went along with it this whole time? What if he doesn’t actually love you and he’s just been using you because you’re vulnerable and you make him feel needed and important?

Isn’t he just some attention hungry monster? He did this to you didn’t he? He triggered this episode for the simple fact that you would be in pain, you would be dependent, you would be reliant, you would see that there is no way you could leave him because he’s the only one who can handle you. You’ll see that won’t you?

God he’s just insane isn’t he? What a sick fuck. Treating you this way for personal gain. To hell with the fact that sometimes a Bipolar episode just sneaks up on you without a reason at all. Anakin knows he did this to you. Even if he didn’t… he’s still a horrible piece of shit because he can’t fix it for you.

Or even worse: what if he’s being used? What if you are playing him and he’s been too blind with infatuation to see it? That’s what’s happening isn’t it? You’ve fucking taken advantage of his kindness, his selflessness, his undying and unconventional love for you. You’re faking it.

When you snap out of this ‘episode’ he’ll lay into you about your true intentions with him. He’d call you out on your selfishness.

He’s better than this. He deserves more than this, can’t you get that through your thick fucking skull? How could you be so stupid? How could you be so dense? Did you truly believe he actually cared about you? No, he just felt sorry for you.

He felt so fucking sorry for you. Pathetic little clingy thing. He’s given and given and given to you and you’ve been nothing but ungrateful. You didn’t even try to get better for him. You rejected his help and this is the last fucking straw. He’s given you every chance, he’s given you everything.

Oh god he’s given you his entire soul. He’s laid his entire being out onto a platter for you to pick apart and terrorize but you’ve done… the opposite. You’ve coddled him when he didn’t deserve it. You made him happy when the world around him was devoid of anything but insufferable, heavy, suffocating despair. You were the light at the end of the long, cold tunnel.

And he’d almost extinguished you.

You were the key to every emotion he couldn’t attain on his own. You kept his happiness, his love, his joy, his contentment, his comfort, his calm.

Without you he’d be nothing.

You should leave. You should run. You should leave.

You should change your name and flee the country because he would stop at nothing to prove himself to you again.

He needs you. You are the air he breathes and the blood in his veins. You are perfect, pure, angelic.

You are heaven on earth and he is a demon walking through the flesh world.

You deserved better. You needed better. You know you deserve better.

But you won’t leave him because you are too kind and loving, you are so sweet and caring. You won’t ever stop. You won’t let him hide. You won’t let him believe he is unloved. You won’t allow him to crawl into himself and go mute. You won’t allow him to let his mind go blank and his flesh move about on autopilot. You won’t allow him to convince himself that he is unworthy.

You won’t give up on him.

And that’s why he has to leave. Permanently. That’s the only way you’ll ever be truly happy and free. He won’t be there to feel the all consuming sorrow every fucking day. He won’t be there to make you watch him drown, suffer as he claws at the surface of the water. So fucking close to air and unable to reach it. So, when he gives up, he won’t drag you down and force you to wallow at the bottom of the lake of despair with him. He won’t suction the life out of you anymore.

He’s selfishly sponged up every drop of life you’ve given him and he knows you must be exhausted from the never ending battle of trying to make him feel human.

It’s better this way. Maybe you’ll meet in the next life and things will be different. Or maybe your soul will recognize his and urge you to escape as quickly as possible. Either way, in this life, Anakin is setting you free.

Because if you love something, you should let it go.

You should let him go.

Don’t cry for him when you find him, feel the sweet relief of all your pain having died with him.

After all, he did this for you.

[hellofanidea]

Prompt: “Hey, hey, shhhh. Shhhh. You’re okay.”

Pairing: CrozBrady

TW: disordered eating, vomiting, recovery from starvation

The doctors tell them it's going to take a while for them to tolerate food like they used to.

It’s almost a given, especially after watching Hambone choke down more canned meat than he’d had in two years and then puke it up into the snow whilst they marched, but it’s still more difficult than Brady anticipated to adjust to eating regularly when they get back to England. He manages to not make himself sick, but it’s a near thing a few times, and his stomach protests at the unfairness of food finally being available but being denied. Then comes the other side of the coin, the fact that he doesn’t actually even realize when he’s hungry anymore, or when he’s full. Eating becomes something between a gamble and a science. 

He weathers it well, though, because that’s what they’re all doing, slowly readjusting with the idea that they’re fine, they’re not hurting, that the Stalag was just a bad dream or a big adventure. They cling to the idea that they’re returning heroes, and not suffering, broken, shells of the men they were.

Which all leads to John Brady staring at the bag of oranges on his bed like they’re a mirage.

He had breakfast this morning, toast and juice and even a little bit of bacon, but that was hours ago. He might be hungry now. He should be hungry now. He can manage an orange. He wants to manage an orange, and can feel his mouth salivating despite the lack of hunger signals just at the sight of the fresh fruit. The first orange he’s seen since leaving the states. As a child he had loved oranges, would bite through the thick skin with his teeth before ripping them open with his thumbs. He’d spit the pips out as he went, competing with himself for how far he could get them.

The need to be that child again, just for a moment, makes the decision for him, and he takes one of the oranges.

It’s sweet and tart and perfect. The flesh tastes like summer and home and joy, and Brady’s pretty sure he moans a little as he swallows. There are barely any pips to stop and spit out, the ones he does collecting by his thigh, and soon the whole orange is devoured.

This is where he should stop, pause like the doctors told him to try and read his body, but his mouth is still stinging with juice and desire, so he snatches another like the bag is about to be ripped from him. It disappears just as fast, and so does the third. He’s on his way through his fourth when his throat seizes, his stomach cramps, and he forces himself very, very still. He’s panting, he realizes, has been between bites like some kind of feral animal. There are dark spots dancing in his vision.

His stomach cramps again, tight and warning, and the saliva gathering at the back of his mouth is definitely no longer a sign of hunger. 

He makes it to the waste bin just in time.

Brady heaves into it on his knees until there’s just bile coming up. It burns the back of his throat, leaves him feeling shaky as a newborn kitten, and he slumps on the floor with his forehead on the rim of the trashcan. The door to the barracks opens, and Brady cringes at being found like this by anyone, even the guys who had been in the Stalag and had seen much worse.

“Shit, John, is that you?”

Fuck.

Brady doesn’t have the strength to look up as Croz rushes over to kneel beside him. A gentle hand lands on his back.

“Are you okay? What happened? Should I get the doc?”

The questions all come out in a rush, and Brady feels himself get so overwhelmed he retches again. More bile. More shaking. When it passes he realizes he’s not only trembling, but crying, tears rolling down his face as he thinks about the fact that he’ll probably never be able to eat another orange without thinking about this, about being folded over in the barracks with the sour smell of vomit in his nose because he can’t eat a few pieces of fruit without consequences anymore. 

It’s stupid, it’s so stupid, he tells himself, but it feels so deeply unfair to have another thing stolen from him, and he just can’t seem to stop crying-

“I gotcha, I gotcha,” Croz says, gently tucking an arm around him and maneuvering him upright to rest against his chest. He’s rubbing soothing little circles along his spine that just seem to make Brady cry harder. His chin tucks over Croz’s shoulder, and he turns his face into his neck like he can hide there. “Hey, hey, shhhh. Shhhh. You’re okay. It’s alright. You’re gonna be alright, John.”

“Fucking oranges,” Brady manages to hiss, his sobbing losing force as it saps the last of his energy.

Croz makes a soothing noise, then an upset one. He keeps rubbing Brady’s back.

“Shit, I’m sorry. Was meant to be a present, I didn’t know you’d get sick.”

How sad Croz sounds, how guilty, breaks his heart. Sniffling, he pushes himself back, wiping his face with the back of his hand until Croz passes him a handkerchief.

“Not your fault,” Brady mutters. “Was me not having any goddamn self-control-”

Laughter from Croz cuts him off, and he scrapes together enough energy to glare at the navigator. There’s a wet patch on his shoulder that Brady quickly looks away from.

“I don’t think anybody’s expecting you to have self-control right now, John.”

Brady’s pride prickles at that, but Croz is watching him so softly, so warmly, that the fight goes out of him instantly.

“Thanks for the oranges,” he says instead, so he doesn’t have to hear Croz talk more about how he should cut himself some slack. “I’m sorry I threw most of them up.”

Croz laughs him off again and gets to his feet, holding out a hand to help Brady off of the floor. His knees wobble treacherously, but Croz steadies him with an arm around his waist. It brings them hip to hip, nose to nose, and Croz presses a kiss to Brady’s cheek even though he knows he has to reek of vomit.

“Don’t sweat it. Christ knows you’ve dealt with me throwing up more than enough.”

[allwormdiet]

Extermination 8.6

Typical American healthcare experience

Legitimately I'm unsure how Skitter is the only villain who loses their fucking mind in the field hospital. This is unbearably claustrophobic and torturous to just put someone through because they're on the away team instead of the home team

So, she's wrong, obviously. But her own tendencies towards distrusting others, especially authority, is only part of the equation. The other part of the equation is that the Protectorate (Armsmaster) wasn't being good to her even before she started "infiltrating" the Undersiders, and we've seen the system allow for some remarkable acts of cruelty along the way; Canary was gagged and put in confoam and chains in a public space, in a court of fucking law, because she could theoretically have super strength.

The system isn't half as bad as Taylor is afraid of, but she's also lived a whole span of her life suffering because of the system's failures

I think this is legitimately, non-power triggering for Taylor, which makes everything that's about to happen that much worse.

S'fucked up. Not a whole lot to say beyond that.

Tattletale wasn't wrong to observe that Taylor isolates herself reflexively, but she reaches out to others pretty regularly, and this isn't even the worst consequence she's had for that. This is a moment of immense vulnerability that she's bearing on purpose to this girl and there's an immense horror at the thought of being ignored.

An answer, finally, and it still hurts

She doesn't even know if she can trust a gesture of kindness like this

I don't even know if she can trust a gesture of kindness like this. Not to doubt the nurse-in-training but more doubting the PRT being cool about it, especially with the reveal coming up they could use to justify it

She's trying, I don't know if it worked but she's trying.

I mean hey, it's something to fucking do, right

Also hey Panacea, looking forward to your totally benign contributions to the course of this arc

Oh Amy, you charmer you

Oh wow what an extremely cool and normal thing to believe about how ethics and humanity work, I'm sure this is based in absolutely real things and not at all being raised by a family of supercops, and also that there are absolutely no repercussions for how this way of thinking might fuck people up who are struggling with negative thoughts or impulses, huh Panacea

Also what an interesting way to mirror Alan Barnes, noted piece of shit, very cool and normal

I know where Taylor is coming from with all of this, but nobody in the story does, and also it's extremely fucking funny that this is a self-avowed supervillain saying these things

Neat detail tbh

The brain thing I get, longstanding stance on even approaching brains, but damn, not even the nerve damage?

Also yeah Taylor, you're a fucking maniac, I don't know how or where you got the drive to operate like that but you're crazy lucky Rachel was there to keep it from killing you

So the nerve thing I get, right, but uhh

This is where Panacea starts to read as pretty sadistic

She's got someone under the mercy of her healing, someone who she's got a grudge against for a multitude of reasons, and unlike the cancer patients and dying children she's allowed to express her resentment towards Skitter, at which point she immediately does so

Also I'm not sure if the line about her "slipping up" with the pain is actually true or if she's punishing Skitter for talking too much

This is pretty dark, actually. If we keep this limited entirely to the bank interaction, Panacea has Skitter under her mercy the same way Skitter had Panacea at knifepoint barely a month ago, but Panacea is doing very little to hide the fact that she's taunting now that she's the one in control.

I'm reminded a bit of those conversations about nurses who were abusing or harassing patients because this was someone vulnerable that they had control over, with little to no recourse even when it's done. Having a career, having a power, where someone's life and comfort and safety is in your hands, and squeezing your grip just enough to make it uncomfortable

As if I didn't have enough reasons to dread Amy's arc in this story

That most heroic of principles, "eye for an eye." There has never been an instance where a self-described good person has used reciprocity as a justification to harm or harass someone they've decided is a bad person in a way that, hey, actually isn't so justified.

So this next part is Amy's fault? Like yeah, Taylor did it, but she did it because she's fucking terrified, and she's fucking terrified because Amy deliberately stoked her fears, gloating about how fucked she was even though she doesn't actually know what's coming, because Amy is a good person and Taylor is a bad person

Dun dun dun

...Yeah no I knew this one already, hard to not be spoiled on this one

Anyway, Taylor done fucked up and now the consequences are coming down fast

Current Thoughts

Amy I'm trying really hard to be sympathetic to you but if you're gonna keep tormenting people under your care because you don't like them and can get away with it there's only so far I can go

This next chapter is gonna be fucking rough

[intothedysphoria]

One thing I love about the harringrove fandom is the agreement both that Steve is dyslexic and Billy is a MASSIVE reader.

Because while Steve’s always been surrounded by teachers or his parents or exes who either believe that he’s incapable of appreciating reading or that he just doesn’t care, Billy thinks that’s bullshit.

Because when Billy gets told to tutor Steve in English, he doesn’t start with a book for toddlers or fucking Shakespeare. They start with Billy reading him Wuthering Heights.

And at first Steve does not fucking get it. He doesn’t understand the plot, the message and especially not the dialect. But he finds himself enjoying it a lot. Billy’s a natural storyteller. He could be on stage.

Billy’s taste in books is both eclectic and weird. He’s reading Finnigan’s Wake for fun. In Irish. He likes Portuguese romance books and German surrealism and a lot of George Orwell. So much so that Steve kind of feels that love rubbing off on him.

He’d used to like reading. Before he was told he was doing it wrong. And even though he despised the books set by Hawkins High with every fibre of his being, there was this fire set in his belly, a want to impress Billy.

So he starts with The Hobbit. Eddie “Freak” Munson’s the only other dyslexic Steve knew and he loved that shit. How hard could it be?

The Hobbit is fucking difficult. It starts with a map, Steve thinks is in Elvish and some of the chapters feel like they go on forever. The words still bounce around the page and switch constantly. He likes it though. It’s weirdly fun as a story and he finds himself rooting for Bilbo.

Henderson can never know. That is the one thing Steve is certain of.

Billy doesn’t laugh when Steve tells him that’s what he’d decided to start with. He just rolls his eyes, not meanly and says he used to read that with his mom. Back in Cali. Before Neil fucked everything up.

Billy reads a lot of Oscar Wilde. The Importance of Being Earnest is constantly tucked into his back, dog eared and well loved. Steve knows enough about Oscar Wilde to know what that indicates.

Billy’s a poof. A faggot. A queer.

Billy is like Steve.

He doesn’t have the courage to look out for anything gay. Nothing even that hints at the matter. Steve knows that his dad has The Iliad tucked away in his office. He’s away on business while his mom sits in the kitchen and complains about America. Even after 15 years in the States, she still misses Poland.

His daring heist after she goes to bed leads to him sitting on the kitchen floor, crying about Achilles and Patroclus. Billy’s right, classics are a fucking bummer.

Steves not as stupid as other people think. He knows that if this were a book, him and Billy are hurtling towards deaths door. Even in real life, he’s seen the guys on tv, worn down to the bone on hospital beds.

Gay does not equal a happy ending.

He resolves to never touch The Iliad again.

Billy comes to their next session with a black eye and his mullet chopped off. They don’t talk about it.

1984 is depressing. And surprisingly apt for how Steve feels that his 1984 has gone. He does feel like he’s constantly being watched. Like being in love is illegal. Like saying anything too far against the government will have consequences.

Steve asks if Billy thinks Orwell wrote 1984 about America or Russia. Billy snorts but doesn’t answer.

That’s the note they end on for the year.

Christmas comes and goes. So does New Year. Two months of not seeing Billy aches in his gut.

Then he comes back.

It’s the middle of February. Billy’s been kicked out for a week. Steves playing nursemaid.

He’s beaten up pretty bad. Still, Billy insists he’s had worse.

Steve hedges around asking why it happened. Like the confirmation might suddenly make the full scope of their plight real.

Still, eventually Steve asks. Billy looks at him like he’s particularly simple.

He’s gay. Obviously Steve. And he actually has the balls to go out there, meet men, dance. Even if it does mean getting caught by Neil.

During his explanation, Steve notices they’ve gotten closer together. Like significantly closer.

They’re grazing hands. Electric.

Then Billy moves.

Billy kisses him and Steve’s world turns into a fucking supernova.

They kiss and it doesn’t make Neil vanish in a puff of smoke, it doesn’t make the shopkeepers who sneer at his mother go away, it doesn’t make Steve magically able to read.

But it does make Steve feel like maybe they’ll survive.

[specialgradefckr]

Heatwave has me on a chokehold.

like fuck. No autonomy for reader fr and it's so deliciously and wrenchingly fucked up for them to present the illusion of free will via limited options even if at the end, they're the ones with the leash, the one in control, regardless of the option you chose.

And I love the difference between Gojo and Geto with Gojo wanting for reader to accept whatever they offer but Geto not really caring if reader really accepts (wants) as long as he provides and takes care of reader (even if against their will) and can very much so resort to forceful means (the tube feeder ((that shit has me like😶, like damn, as long as reader eats lmao)).)

The way you write the humiliation for reader with all the times they forced them to wet themself feels real fr. That shit is literally picking at their self-esteem, and the constant unwanted reaffirmation that it's natural and it's fine is so not doing any good at all to her pysche.

Ngl I wanna see reader after the panic attack breaking and turn into a hollow shell fr. One that do still talks, entertains and obeys but one that's just hollow. Half-hearted at best and empty at worse because they're gearing for the worse (the abandonment. the pain, left behind all tied up and with no control over her body. They've turned her into someone who can't even feel like they're capable of making choices on their own anymore). Just for the angst and a little (okay maybe big) karma for what they've done🥰

Wonderful writing! Hope to see more jjk with stsg (esp satoru) and If you don't mind, make a little insight to their pov?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on the fic! hearing this makes me feel really great about writing this, because it's like!

yes!! PRECISELY!! SO REAL SO TRUE!!! the message has come across, the fic gave you exactly the feelings i had when i was making it!! it makes me feel like i successfully conveyed,, The Vision,,,

honestly it started out as horny and it was supposed to have heat sex later on but then when i got into the forced piss stuff it got. sooo psychological.

in the back of my mind i kinda knew it was getting off track but it was getting SO GOOD. i loved writing about. conditioning, psychological warfare, the loss of control and how people deal with it.

jjk itself is pretty brutally realistic with the consequences of the bad things that happen in the series, and i love realistic dark content.

you try a hunger strike? geto deals with it. you do not refuse food again. they are yanderes and they are not afraid to make this very ugly and very uncomfortable for you. they'll do it sometimes even if you DO cooperate.

gojo is truly the essence of a puppy dog. he loves you sooo sososo much and maybe he'll throw a fit but he's not the calculated tactician geto can be. geto's got goals. gojo's just happy to be here.

the panic attack/breakdown kinda just came out when i was trying to write you going into heat.

it was supposed to be this stockholm syndrome moment where you're like "oh at least they won't leave me" but then i started getting into. well.

they did leave you once, didn't they? and at every moment they remind you, sometimes in the most humiliating ways, that you DO NOT control what they do or how they treat you.

so now you're enduring psychological warfare from your own psyche where you're wrestling with the idea of getting impregnated because:

you don't want to be pregnant

but if you DID get pregnant, then they would HAVE to stay with you, right?

but you don't WANT them to stay with you. you hate them, right? if they left you'd like that because you don't WANT them around.

but what if they wouldn't stay with you anyways? you can't make them do anything.

actually you can't even control that so why worry haha. they're going to get you pregnant if they want to, they'll leave you if they want to, and you can't do anything about it.

just the absolute war zone in your head as every thought clashes with all the others. the natural consequences of the stuff you've been through since the beginning of the fic, all trickling down into one moment.

*extremely quietly* okay don't tell anyone bc it's annoying when people JUST say "can't wait for part 2" and nothing else, like.

what did you like so much? what would you hope to see expanded on? many writers would love to hear this in a comment, but instead they just get "part 2 please" and it feels like a demand.

i know it comes from a place of appreciation but it's not encouraging when that's all someone has to say about your work.

THAT BEING SAID...

there WAS actually more to that fic. i kept writing after where it ends. it switches to geto's POV and him and gojo freaking out, trying to calm you down and figure out what happened and how to fix it.

i realized that this oneshot would turn into a huge monster of a fic if i let it keep going, and i had a really good stopping point already with the reader in the midst of their breakdown, so i cut it there and posted so i could start writing for the next prompt (which i'm also super enjoying!).

if i DO any kind of part 2 or companion piece for ANY of the heatwave fics, it'll be that one.

i'm not sure how i want it to go, though. it'd be easier to write the shell of a reader from gojo/geto's POV, but i like keeping things primarily in the reader's POV. i also don't like to stick to one mood, especially not some boring doom and gloom suffering stuff.

i'll need someone to do something drastic in the follow up. maybe gojo? he's got to get something out of you somehow. and we all know what a freak he is, the fuck is he gonna get up to, hmmm...

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 46 Nonsense Takes

Hello dear void. So, about that whole "I wish Hokazono-sensei would slow down just a smidge" thing... yeah. Not happening. Dude's writing like he still needs to stave off the infamous WSJ axe.

I don't know man. I have a lot of thoughts that all boil down to "I wish it had gone differently." Not because I think I could do it better myself- I can't even write fanfiction that I'm comfortable with posting anonymously. But this is the first time I've ever been disappointed because we didn't get a chapter of uninterrupted talking heads.

There was plenty of dialogue, and a lot of it was intriguing. I'm gonna go ham on it all in a bit. But the way the chapter ended kind of disappointed me. This is 100% Hestzhyen's Rubbish Opinion here, but fucking let the characters rest. I hate it when the characters jump from one crisis to another until the end of time. We've seen Chihiro running on fumes for far too long now and Hakuri's going to be even worse off. Guy can't even use the power they need him for without hurting himself so bad he passes out, but there's no time to let him recover. Gotta chase the bad guys!

It's ultimately a tone and pacing thing. Having the characters fight when they're already tired and/or meaningfully injured is a basic tool in the writer's kit for establishing tension. But we've done that for almost every major fight in Kagurabachi so far! Even against random Yakuza mooks! Chihiro's been operating at less than full capacity since the Hishaku's tree exploded the guy they tried to interrogate in chapter 2 for fuck's sake. He wasn't even fully rested going in to the Rakuzaichi- his arm was newly healed and bandaged up. The "ooh they're not at full strength, this'll be tough!" thing is getting old.

Okay me, no need to hit image cap with examples. But every major fight has involved using this tool in some way- every Char rescue and fighting Sojo, the Rakuzaichi infiltration and storehouse fight, and now we're starting an arc with it. I am adamantly against any series doing this without subverting expectations. If Chihiro isn't meaningfully punished for constantly risking himself when he's not at 100%, it's flawed writing in my opinion. (Passing out or losing a limb doesn't count when Char can reverse that.)

Enough bashing. Obviously this is early in an ongoing series and we've just started the arc. There's a ton of story left to go through so chill, me. In fact, Shiba being separated from Chihiro might be an indication that yes, finally, there are going to be lasting consequences of some kind for him.

I say this because Shiba's been the lone voice of reason when Chihiro decides it's time to go off the rails. He's ignored pretty much every time, but he's still there to manage the setup and aftermath. Chihiro won't have that safety net this time. I love Hakuri to pieces but he doesn't have the experience to do the intel groundwork, nor the ability to perfectly replace Shiba's clutch escape factor, you know? So I'll shut up and wait to see what happens for now.

Actual Analysis Section

Getting right into it, we immediately learn that Shiba's not coming along due to some bad blood between himself and some Kunishige antis in the Kamunabi leadership. (I feel you, man. The Kunishige we've seen so far was the best.) So while he could turn up, I think Shiba will be on the sidelines working on his own subplot. This is the "Kamunabi Classifieds/Secret Files" arc after all. Gonna be a lot of awful truths getting unearthed and Shiba is the best guy to give us insight.

Recall this conversation in chapter 7:

Despite having quit the Kamunabi under mutually unfriendly terms, Shiba's still got connections to them. Enough that he's still included in their plans when situations call for him. I think most readers clued in to the fact that Shiba was some kind of Special Ops guy when he worked there: he's very comfortable snooping around and doing a little "forceful interrogation" to get information. But the exact nature of his history might come to light this arc. And he'll be a very interesting viewpoint into the Kamunabi as someone who is deeply entwined with the org but is loath to cooperate with them for personal reasons. I suspect he'll have the most objective opinion out of the rest of the cast.

As for Azami, he was in a real bind this chapter- he didn't say a single word and was sweating bullets the entire time. He did move to protect Chihiro when Blond Jerkass threatened him at least. This arc is gonna be pretty painful for him I think. Bet most of the tension will come from his reasons for staying with the Kamunabi versus wanting to do right by Chihiro and Shiba.

Also, time to revoke my "guess the associations" privileges since I completely missed the mark on which Bearer is associated to which area. Kabuki monk guy ([漆羽] Uruha! A name, thank god!) is in the hotsprings. Or was, rather. Hope he wasn't wishing for some excitement in his life because he got more than he bargained for with that Hishaku suicide raid I think. Is he running towards safety with the Hishaku, Kamunabi, or freedom from both...?

Another guy with a weird name too. 漆 (uru, also read as nana in modern Japanese) is very, very old and likely derives from descriptions of the shine of wood that's been lacquered or varnished. In names it can convey strength, resilience, and uniqueness. 羽 (ha) means feather and has associations with freedom, grace, good fortune, and lots of support through life. So "gleaming feather" or "lacquered feather"? Guessing he'll be a free-spirited dude with an unusual perspective! Ooh this has got me excited.

Anyway. How about that unresolved conflict at the chapter's end? Chihiro made a decent case for himself (seriously he was so cool cutting off Blond Jerkass to remind them of he good he's accomplished), but the major sticking point of him being unwilling to completely fall under the Kamunabi's control is still there. You can bet your sweet Bippy it's going to be a major source of conflict in this arc. "An enemy of my enemy is my friend" is the best way to describe the relationship between him and the government right now, and that sentiment is not a solid foundation for a lasting partnership.

I can see the Hishaku forcing the Kamunabi's hand in trusting Chihiro and Hakuri, fighting tooth and nail but still letting them get the swords, then swooping in as the Kamunabi self-destructs over what to do with them. God I can't wait suss out what they're actually doing though. John Hishaku, you are peak entertainment.

Poor guy is always surprised when he's relevant to a conversation.

More Hakuri than expected! Yay! He also got to have some good moments with Tafuku, which is really cool! Sad that he's nerfed going in to the arc, but it makes sense. Wonder if they shared that he can use Isou too... it's not relevant to this discussion so not surprised it wasn't addressed. Guess we'll see later! Love these little mysteries that hook us between the larger plot developments. Everything is explained when it needs to be instead of awkwardly blurted out or infodumped.

Best panel in the chapter by far.

Tafuku's such a bro, man. I really hope that he and Hiyuki are assigned to keep watch over Chihiro and Hakuri as they search for Uruha.

Speaking of Hiyuki, seems like she's got a lot of pull with some members of the leadership council. I wonder if that's due to her status as the Kamunabi's strongest fighter alone or if there's a bit more going on... Hiyuki backstory when?

ALMOST got to see Azami's sorcery again (ch 46 vs. 7). What a cock tease. Seems to be some sort of condensed energy ability.

Look at Hakuri! He was gonna whisk Chihiro away into the storehouse to protect him, even though it would mean putting himself at odds with the council! He's so willing to put himself at risk for Chihiro it's scary. Couldn't register and transport that notebook without knocking himself out but he'll do whatever it takes for his samurai. Seriously! God I love him. (Is this foreshadowing? I think it's character consistency more than anything else, but we'll see...)

Slightly prefer the fan TL of the line ("Place your bets on me!")

Another favorite trope of mine. Chihiro unintentionally echoing his dad's words from 20 years ago got me good- and I'm not the only one based on some of the council's reactions. I love Kagurabachi for a lot of reasons but moments like this are definitely near the top. The theme of legacy and the past influencing the present is handled so well- always there, but never overdone. Thank you for trusting us to get the point, Hokazono-sensei.

So Kunishige was willing to help the war effort but was unproven at the time. He had to convince them to trust in him at all. Interesting, very interesting. Something compelled him to be there to make his case- looking forward to finding out what that was. DEAD DIL-

Trial, Interrupted

What did we learn?

One, the Kamunabi do blood tests. Weird but alright, guess they've got records of all their members' blood types and profiles stashed away somewhere. No wait that's fucking insane. Why do you need that genetic information? Why does it have to be blood instead of saliva? Why do you store it apparently indefinitely even after death- and how? What happened to references, finger printing, and researching public records to verify identity? (Actually, Chihiro might not have been properly registered as a citizen at birth due to his circumstances... that would be a fun wrinkle in him earning a paycheck.)

Guess: drawing Chihiro's blood is going to reveal Something. Exactly what isn't something I want to speculate too hard on, but it's gonna be relevant to this arc so I'll put a pin in it for now.

Two, the Hishaku have precisely zero chill. John has been preparing for god knows how long to attack the Bearers and now is the time to strike. So this leaves me with two questions: why is Chihiro being there with the Kamunabi perfectly fine (perhaps even necessary), and did they somehow account for Hakuri's presence in their plans?

I have a list of unanswered questions about Hakuri and the Sazanamis in a text file and this adds more. No one knew he was a Special Boy with the storehouse ability until yesterday (in-universe)... theoretically. And his abilities seem perfect for throwing a wrench in the Hishaku's machinations. So if they don't know about Hakuri, how will they adapt- and what will that mean for Team Goldfish? If they do know, then how? And why let this go forward? Wow falling for the plot hooks driving the narrative, how unique! Reagrdless of which scenario comes to be, I genuinely fear for Hakuri's safety... maybe a bit too much.

Three, Kamunabi politics aren't divided into neat factions for easy comprehension. At last we have some insights into the leaders' personalities though.

Rude mfers

These might be the guys that Shiba had a disagreement with before leaving. Blond Jerkass in particular is trying really hard to look villainous; he's clearly not a fan of Kunishige and went out of his way to get us all to hate him. I think he is too principled to work with the Hishaku, but he'll definitely be a thorn in Chihiro's side.

"Principled? This guy?!" Yeah!

He disagreed vehemently with Kunishige's decision to hide the swords instead of letting the Kamunabi keep them, and he sees that same "selfishness" in Chihiro is my read of him. He's also got no qualms about killing Chihiro to make Enten available to the Kamunabi since Chihiro's wielding it without any kind of oversight. This is our "authority of the establishment" guy for sure. He's there for the mission in his own way, and I hope we learn his motivations before he's offed or put on a shelf.

Pencil 'Stache seems like a snobbish skeptic so I kinda wanna punch him too. He has a modicum of concern for the issues at hand at least, I'll give him that. Not much else to say about him right now.

Prince Nez, Azami, Mask, and Eyepatch are strongly implied to be the ones who helped Kunishige hide, so they're likely to at least be neutral. Even if they had no great love for Kunishige himself, they could have been persuaded to help on practical grounds.

Azami might be the only one with personal reasons since he was Kunishige's friend. Very interesting that Chihiro claimed not to know him though... did Shiba know or guess his circumstances and tell Chihiro to lie? Azami was off screen after chapter 18 so there's a time gap to fill there- when we left off with him, he was under investigation for secretly harboring Chihiro. He's not a happy camper about any of this and I want to know exactly why. (Also, Chihiro backstory?! He didn't always live in the mountains with his dad, and he knows or was old enough to remember leaving his old home to live there??? LORE PLEASE.)

Prince Nez seems like a rational guy based on his segments explaining why going to war with the Sazanami would be bad in Ch. 22. He's the only one who seems concerned about getting to the heart of the matter here as well, being less concerned with Chihiro's ancestry versus the feasibility of his plan. Not to mention being the one to bring up that Magatsumi needs to be properly resealed as soon as possible. So I think he's a guy who is motivated by practical concerns above all else. Logic over passion is my read of him. He'll take the best approach based on merits more than anything else.

Mask appears fairly neutral. He's one of the two who was impressed by Hiyuki's assessment of Chihiro's character, so he could share at least a few of her ideals about justice and protecting the peace. She didn't rebuke him like the other guy so he's probably sincere (or at least not an obvious faker).

Eyepatch had just one line- he thought that Chihiro did in fact look like... someone he knew. Context would lead us to assume it's Kunishige, but after decades of being baited by Nomura as a KH fan, I know a potential red herring when I see one. I won't go full tinfoil hat theory here without more info but I will demand a treat if Eyepatch was referring to Chihiro's mom.

Hairclips has a very neutral impression right now since this is the only time she spoke. She was one of the three who originally sealed Magatsumi but everything else about her is a mystery right now. She got a big panel to herself so I expect to learn more about her later.

The "this meeting could have been an e-mail" vibes speak to my soul.

Piercing Guy seems like he's in it for himself first and foremost between this outburst and Hiyuki calling him a creep for wanting her approval. Then again, he seemed pretty open to hearing Chihiro's arguments about judging him based on his actions rather than his lineage. He's also amenable to accepting Chihiro as soon as he unknowingly echoes his father's resolve from decades prior... despite starting the chapter by saying he doesn't see the resemblance at all.

There's two ways to read this: either he's careless and selfish and going with what seems good at the time, or he's careless and forgot details about Kunishige until Chihiro's testimony brought them back. I think he's the most suspicious one so far. I've got my eye on you, Piercing Guy. Careless people are easy to manipulate and corrupt.

Beard Guy seems like the first among equals. Someone who carefully weighs the pros and cons of every course of action before committing. He played the role of practical, fair-minded judge rather well this chapter. He's also quite decisive in a crisis, but there's a lot more to unpack with him. (Is he Hiyuki's supervisor? How does he actually feel about everything?) Reserving judgement until we see more of his inner thoughts.

So yeah. Chihiro and the Kamunabi have agreed to work together for now, but they certainly aren't solid allies. And the Hishaku are going all out with their datenseki stockpile to blow everything up for some reason... So much for getting to chill but hey, at least there's no time wasted either. Until next time, kind void.

[nkn0va]

After reading that one izanami post i was wondering if you could do other bb girls reacting to an unplanned pregnancy? Possibly noel kokonoe and tsubaki?

And this request takes the title of taking the longest to write due to various unfortunate circumstances...

-Chances are the...act that lead up to such a thing happened because you couldn't help but notice her severe lack of self confidence, especially in her body. One thing lead to another and it ended up happening as a more direct way of assuring her that you did indeed find her attractive.

-However in the heat of the moment neither of you remembered the potential consequences, nor the protection for such consequences. The two of you had to find out the hard way. As soon as the test comes back positive Noel especially is just stunned, not knowing what on Earth to be thinking right now.

-Truthfully, she'd always wanted to be a mother deep down and do for a child what her parents did for her when she had nothing, but at the same time now that it's actually about to happen she's probably having a breakdown.

-She has no idea what to do with a child when it eventually comes, she's far too busy with her job in the NOL. And god forbid Major Kisaragi finds out the reason she suddenly has to go on leave.

-At least you have the excuse to finally not have to worry every day about needing to eat Noel's cooking or deflect it as believably as possible and get her to rest. You can finally take the reigns for once in that department.

-The news is received to...mixed responses. Makoto is thrilled, already getting ideas of being the 'fun aunt'. Mai's somewhat in the same boat but also slightly worried for you two. Tsubaki has some very choice words for you. If she wasn't already close friends with you she would've probably landed you in the ICU, best case scenario. After she gets over her initial shock and rage she can finally calm down and take the situation for what it is. She's not a fan of abortion so this is something everyone has to deal with now.

-As excited as Noel is about the prospect of a child, she's also extremely nervous. She doesn't want to mess this up. It only gets worse the closer to birth she gets, you're gonna need to spend a lot of time reassuring her.

-When the time does finally come and she hears her child's first cries, holding them in her arms, she very quickly breaks down into tears, and in that moment she knows she wants to be a mom.

-Kokonoe doesn't really pay attention to...those particular base urges of hers. At least she didn't until you started dating. That's when she finally started having those intrusive thoughts.

-Normally that wouldn't be a bad thing, but this is Kokonoe we're talking about. She shows absolutely zero restraint in those intrusive thoughts 90 percent of the time so you were pretty much doomed from the start. Or blessed, depending on your perception.

-Shortly after your night together she starts getting sick in a way she never had before, none of it made any sense to her. It was only when started running checks on herself she realized what happened.

-Well this is just fucking great.

-This was seriously the last thing she needed right now. She was caught up in trying to contain Azrael all the while dealing with the Civil War. She didn't need a damn child on top of that. As much as she wants to just abort and get it done with, she just...can't seem to muster up the will to do it, and that's still without you expressing your want to raise a kid with her. She soon begrudgingly resigns to her fate and lets it happen.

-If you think her chocolate addiction is bad normally, you haven't seen shit yet. She is going through the stuff by the bucket while pregnant when she has her way. If you're smart about it though you can leverage this fact and bribe her to eat normal, healthy food for both her and the baby's sake.

-The actual pregnancy itself doesn't really affect much outside of that. She almost never went out anyway and she has non-in-person ways of ordering people around so they're left in the dark about it.

-She is cursing you and squeezing your hand in active malice during the birthing process. Given her beastkin strength, you've got several bones in there cracked now. At least Sector Seven's medical care is top notch so you recover in record time.

-You're gonna have to take primary care of the kid, Kokonoe is already busy enough as is dealing with all the shit she has to deal with. That doesn't mean she doesn't want to, though.

-Deep down, she does wanna care for the kid, she knows what it's like to not have parents in her life and she doesn't want her own child to have to endure that. Out of care but also out of spite to be a better parent than Jubei was. She has no idea what she's doing and she acts like she isn't trying but she really is doing her best despite her complete and utter lack of experience. She just hides it behind the the apathetic, impatient mask. When no one's watching she's researching every childcare related topic she can so that she can give them a better life than she had, but she'll never let you know.

-The chances of such a prim, proper, chaste girl like Tsubaki getting pregnant by accident is very slim. The only real way this is happening is if you're already married to her and she gets curious about the act. She'd never even heard of it until embarrassingly late in life and it was only when she entered the military academy and overheard fellow classmates talking about it.

-However as smart as she is, she forgot about the concept of protection in the heat of the moment. An uncharacteristic mistake on her part which she soon found out the hard way, causing her brain to basically shut off as she stares down at the test.

-On one hand this was always what she's wanted. To settle down, marry, and start a family. She was looking forward to it ever since she fell for you. On the other hand, the weight of what that really was finally started to set in now that it was about to happen. Being wholly responsible for the health and wellbeing of an entire person that depended on her for basic survival was now starting to really mean something for her. You're gonna have to snap her out of this and reassure her that everything will be fine as long as you two tackle it as a team.

-Similarly to Kokonoe, her love for chocolate only grows more pronounced during pregnancy, though she does at least realize she can't live off it. She's much more mature about it. She'll try to hold back most of the time, though try is sometimes the keyword. It's pretty cute in all honesty.

-All her friends soon inevitably find out and most of them are thrilled. Jin much less so, but it's Jin. He still wishes you well, though not without threats of freezing you to a popsicle if you screw this up. You already got that when you married Tsubaki though, so no big deal mostly.

-The moment you confirm the baby's gender she immediately starts the name brainstorming, her excitement is infectious. She definitely steers towards more traditional names in her preferences, mostly Japanese but a foreign name can definitely catch her interest if it's meaning really speaks to her values.

-Tsubaki is basically the model mother every mom wishes to be. She's devoted, understanding, caring, and has an endless amount of love to give. She can finally give all that love to an offspring like she's always wanted, and she'll make sure her child is never lonely like she was growing up.

-Of course though, part of that includes the child having siblings...she'll go as far as you want to with that. At least one more, but other than that she has no particular preferences herself. The more the better in her opinion but she does also want to respect your wishes since you might not be as excited as her. If you somehow are she only falls even more in love.

[facetsofthecloset]

i'm sure it's been said but i feel like both Raxtus and Ronodin can be argued as "the only gay kid in the family and consequently shunned/rejected" and it's like. so weird bc Mull is so Mormon he'd probably rather eat his shorts than even acknowledge the possible existence of gays but

i mean. Raxtus literally has a fairy form. he's a fairy dragon.

Ronodin was just emo lol

and they both get so thoroughly rejected and sidelined by their families their whole lives and it turns Raxtus into an awkward but basically decent guy who runs back to the approval of his family once he's performed masculinity/violence enough to be accepted, only to then realize that he's basically just being used and still not fully trusted/accepted and having to betray them to save his real friends

(who sadly are probably actually homophobic but that's ok bc they're not dragon-phobic so that works out for him)

while Ronodin's like "fuck it. chaos and murder then!" and can you really blame him? he spent his entire life trying to conform to the "right" (in this case, Light) way of life, started spending time with the outgroup and learned to question things, then was told he was "too corrupt" to remain in his home

like. the symbolism is right there.

it's so funny, because sure Raxtus isn't a bad guy, but Ronodin definitely is and he pretty much gets sent to a type of hell at the end of Dragonwatch

and while Raxtus gets kind of a happy ending, like, him becoming an effective killer in a war and being accepted by his dad for being Good At Murder in the first Fablehaven series is presented as a happy ending. if Celebrant didn't wind up being the main villain for Dragonwatch, that probably would've been the end of it! gay kid learns how to soldier and is finally accepted by his homophobic family bc he's finally aggressive enough for them to love him

(i mean i have MANY issues with Celebrant being the main villain later and the reasons he's framed as bad but like. that's a separate rant lol)

the queer reading is right there. but also it's very bad and you can tell completely unintentional. or at the very least highly repressed. idk man i don't look into Mull as a personal individual bc i doubt i'll like what i see and i don't care that much but Dragonwatch was SO MUCH MORE MORMON than Fablehaven already was and it's so weird, seeing the fingerprints of it all over.

i feel like he either has a new editor or he's been doing this for long enough and sold enough books that he has the clout to veto changes made by editors or SOMETHING, bc i feel like? he's gotten worse?? and more unfiltered?? that or something happened and he's like. even more religious than before or something idk

like fablehaven was just kinda generic/bland fantasy with some fun ideas for magic items/powers/one sentence character premises, with just a hint of sus Mormon ideology, and then Dragonwatch just went. Full Mormon.

but then there's somehow even more weirdly queer shit. like. he's repressing so hard he's approaching queer from the other side??

idk man i wish this deeply mediocre man's writing wasn't a formative piece of middle school reading, leading to me still giving more of a shit than i really should over questionable children's literature now

[fancymussmuss]

Canon Events is information not be shared.

This is a fact Miguel lacts to understand because of his short thinking.

This isn't Miguel slander but more of an analysis of his thinking process and his character if we look at what his goal is and how he's handling it at a realistic view.

Miguel o'hara/ Spider-Man 2099's original goal was to "fix" the multiverse by putting anomalies back in their universes which is fine if you do it correctly, which he isn't doing ( I'll touch on that topic later).

If we accept his theory about Canon Events and that they are factual and are able to destroy universe when broken

Then there is no fucking reason to tell people about it then!!! It is information that was never meant to shared because it happens behind the scenes, it has to play out without the Spider-Person knowing about it.

Call me cruel or whatever but it's better if Spider-People don't know about it because it's just another mess waiting to happen in the future.

I'm not siding with Miguel about letting people die because of his theory, but let's just imagine he's right about Canon Events which cause universes to collapse when broken.

If we accept this theory and think about it more, you'll realize there is absolutely no reason why people should know about it, hence if Miguel had thought about this he would know to keep his mouth shut about it and keep this information to himself in order not to jeopardize Spider-Men and women across the Spider-Verse.

Now, you might be thinking that he's doing the right thing, that it's within those peoples rights to know the truth

What truth would it be, it's a fortune cookie no one would want because it's a fucking horrible situation about to happen to them.

What I'm saying is that telling people about Canon Events is absolute torture for those who are about to experience one, hence when it's a bad one. For example.

"Hey your wife is going to die by getting shot at a supermarket by a pickpocket , but because it's a Conan Event, we can't risk you breaking it by sending you back home so we're just ganno keep you here until she's pretty much dead on the sidewalk. So just stay here, be stuck with that thought and yeah, we'll get back to you later. We know you'll do the right thing because you wouldn't want your universe to collapse, bye!"

That's what Miguel is basically telling Spider-People when a loved one is about to be killed because it's a Conan Event. I'm sorry but if that happened to me, I would rather want to stay oblivious to this information.

Because we all know what happens when a Spider-Man loses a loved one.

But just imagine how worse these Spider-Men would get if they knew it was ganno happen, to be stuck with the choice of either saving the universe or this one person, to be forced to stay in a foreign universe because you're a risk to people's safety, to later go home to a dead loved one you knew was ganno die and being stuck with that guilt and self hatred of not being able to save them. If we look at what happens when a Spider-Person experience this kind of mental struggles, they can end up killing people.

Miguel isn't thinking about the consequences of his choice about telling people about Canon Events, he's only thinking about the first consequences if they break it. He's only ganno make the people around him just as bitter as he is.

If he wanted to make his job easier and not cause situations like what's happening with Miles, he just has to keep his mouth shut, end of discussion. If he knows so much about Canon Events and was actually thinking, he wouldn't tell people about it and send them home when their about to experience a Canon Event.

Don't point something out that people never noticed. Don't tell them that it can be broken. And especially don't show them how to break if you don't want it to be broken!

(I don't know if the writers were intending for Miguel and the Spider Society to be idoits but it's really bad for the image they are making them out to be)

But then again he isn't Spider-Man, he wouldn't fully understand, he's still a rookie in all this.

No this isn't a theory this is actual facts. I'm ganno explain more in another post.

[thedoubteriswise]

I respect your opinions a lot and I don't mean to argue feel free to ignore this but threatening to withhold your vote to influence government policy is THE basis of democracy. take that away and what leverage do the people have? your vote is between you and yourself. most people making noises about not voting Biden will probably end up voting for him anyway but it's important to at least be able to express dissent and say. here's my line I will not cross. there's an implication in that post that anyone who's threatening to withdraw their vote is privileged and won't suffer any negative consequences from a trump administration that is simply untrue, as many Arab Americans are people of color. loudly shushing and calling out voices on the left who express their disgust with current gvt policy by pointing out that the alternative is worse ultimately in the long run gives a pass to the left to also get worse as long as they don't get on trumps level

Idk. I probably will vote for him. but guilt tripping people who are uncomfortable with genocide ain't it

much like everyone who's not an absolute ghoul, I'm also pretty damn uncomfortable with genocide, so I'm not "guilt tripping" anyone for feeling the same way. I get that I'm being flippant in the tags this ask is about, but that's a very weird and uncharitable interpretation of what I said.

my actual point is that if donald trump becomes president again, it will not improve what's happening in palestine, and in fact will almost certainly worsen it to a significant degree. I say this with full awareness of the despicable misery palestinians are already being subjected to. there's no benefit whatsoever to letting this guy win. even just the idea that allowing republicans to win elections will somehow force democrats to the left in the future is based on like... nothing? it's not what happens; I don't know why people keep imagining that's a thing that regularly occurs in real life.

beyond that, I take issue with the point that this doesn't matter because most of the people saying this stuff will end up voting for biden anyway. I remember how this kind of conversation affected the outcome of the 2016 election. maybe a lot of them will vote for biden, but the thought process expressed in that tweet being constantly put forward in public discourse has a considerable effect on the behavior of the electorate as a whole, and we have very recent evidence of that. it's impossible for me to pretend that this type of shit is harmless. I'm not "shushing" people for saying that US foreign policy on this is disgusting (it is disgusting, it always has been, and saying so is right, which is why I'm doing it too). I'm telling them to stop encouraging people not to vote, because doing so has observable negative impacts.

and to be clear, it's truly not that I don't understand why people feel the way they do about voting for a candidate who's doing bad things - I do get it, I don't think the feelings themselves are wrong or unjustified, and I sympathize. but republicans won't care that they only won because the left was too demoralized to show up, or because the left thought they were taking a principled stance by withholding their votes. they'll fuck things up either way. the negative feelings you have about being stuck voting for shitty democrats are valid, but those feelings, whether motivated by simple empathy or by deeply painful personal experience, don't alter what republicans actually do when they hold public office.

you are an autonomous human being, I'm just some admittedly fallible guy with a tumblr account, and I can't force you to do what I think you should do. but I couldn't possibly disagree more that "threatening to withhold your vote to influence government policy is THE basis of democracy." I think actually weighing in on the available options whenever you have an opportunity is the basis of democracy, and withholding your vote isn't doing that. I think disapproving silence and apathetic silence look exactly the same to an outside observer. I think whoever told you that walking away from the table and letting your opponents make all the decisions is some kind of power move was either malicious or not very bright.

and, respectfully, I am completely certain that you are wrong when you say your vote is between you and yourself. the worldwide material consequences of letting republicans be in charge are worse than the material consequences of letting democrats be in charge, and we have oodles of evidence of this reality available to us. knowingly making a decision that increases the chance of the more dangerous candidate gaining power when it's pretty easy to do the opposite is not a rational or morally defensible choice, even if the less dangerous candidate is still a bastard. even if the intentions that lead someone to that choice are understandable and decent. people are entitled to form their own opinions and act accordingly, but they're not entitled to me praising or ignoring actions that are materially damaging.

which is a very long way of saying that after months of putting up with seeing this nonsense, mostly in polite silence, I think I'm allowed a single, tiny, factually justified wobbly in the tags of a tumblr post containing a screenshot of a dogshit stupid tweet.