#mspec heteromantic

[xxcalicofemmexx]

mspec straight + cats

flag credit: left belongs to @lovesick-bat, right belongs to @forestcoric-mogai-fox

Mspec Straight: Someone who identifies as straight and at least one mspec (multisexual spectrum) term. An intentionally vague term, for a broad umbrella that community can gather under. Mostly used by multigender, genderfluid, and otherwise nonbinary individuals, though it is not a closed label.

[kawaiitail-chan]

"B-b-but! They're only friends! They can't be gay! Thy are married to wome-" SHUT THE FUCK UP! I hate it when people erase the Mspec in favor of their oh so dear pwecious heteromantive canon couple

[demiaroacejadeharley]

Exclusionists claim that they hate TERFs even though both group share the same beliefs.

-They both believe that Queer is still a slur even though it's no longer a slur

-They both believe that exclusion is helpful (even though it's harmful)

-Panphobic, Mspecphobic, Aphobic (they both believe that Asexuality and Aromantism isn't a spectrum and/or all Ace and Aro people aren't Queer)

-TERFs are biphobic to Bi women who date men while Exclusionists use similar rhetoric against Bi people who date the opposite gender towards Ace and Aro people

-TERFs and some Exclusionists are gender critical and transphobic towards Nonbinary and Genderqueer people.

-They both get upset when people correct them and double down on their bigotry

-They both weaponize one or more groups of people to further their bigotry towards certain groups

If Exclusionists don't want to be compared to TERFs, maybe they should focus on real issues facing the Queer community more than people labeling themselves as identities they don't agree with.

-Exclusionists should focus more on how Conservative politicians are planning to banning Queerness than people who identify as Pansexual or any other Mspec labels

-Exclusionists need to focus more on how Conservative want to push for Trans bathroom bans and prosecuting Trans people for simply wanting to use the bathroom than Trans people who want to use It/Its Pronouns and Neopronouns and identify as Xenogenders

-Exclusionists need to focus more on how conservatives are making baseless accusations that Queer people are groomers and pedophiles than Asexual/Acespec and Aromantic/Arospec who identify as Heteromantic/Heterosexual

-Exclusionists need to focus more on how conservatives want to ban drag performances and any public Pride celebrations than mocking Trans men who want to identify as a Lesbian

If Exclusionists just focus on fighting for Queer rights and fighting for the basic human rights of all Queer people instead of excluding people whose identity they don't agree with, then it will reduce the toxicity, gatekeeping, exclusion, and in fighting in the community. The Queer community is supposed to be inclusive and welcoming to all good faith Queer identities. And if any Exclusionist doesn't not agree with that, then they shouldn't be allowed in the community if they're going to try to push people out because someone's identity hurts their precious feelings.

[kamianya-ttv]

There’s been so much lately in the queer community with “this version of this identity is not okay!” (Mspec lesbians, non-binary femmes, heterosexual aromatics, asexual heteromantics, etc etc etc). The one I just saw was claiming pansexuality harms the community, a take I haven’t seen for a bit and thought we had finally moved past. I’m not reblogging because I don’t want to have the hate part of the post on my feed or platform the OP (though there was a WONDERFUL rebuttal to it and I am sad I just lost the rebuttal’s author, because they deserve kudos)

Doing this always leads to greater exclusion and FAR more harm to the queer community than inclusion. It also often ignores actual queer history. Especially right now, when we’re under so much threat internationally, pointing to other queer people and going “this identity or this way of performing the identity is harmful/ridiculous” is so unhelpful. It tears us apart when we need to work together.

The only exception to this, IMO, is pointing to people being bigoted (speaking of, hey trans community, we need to acknowledge and deal with the racism gdi). It is ALWAYS the time to acknowledge and deal with and fight bigotry.

[demonic-shadowlucifer]

Update: I fixed the typo! I also added an "And vice versa!" next to the heteromantic gays/lesbians/mspecs section as a way to acknowledge homoromantic and mspec (biromantic/panromantic/polyromantic/ omniromantic) straights as well!

Made YET another edit of this meme

(Image ID: An edited image featuring three pikachus holding either strop signs or rainbow flags and floating text. Part of this meme has been edited out in black with white text added. The text reads "it's "june" which mean it's Time for a reminder that the original version of this meme is incredibly aphobic and ignores the existence of trans and nonbinary people too. Straight aspecs, straight trans folks, straight intersex folks, straight nonbinary folks and heteroromantic gays/lesbians/mspecs exist as well and are still queer. Queer =/= nonstraight. Happy Pride Month yall!". There is also an arrow and black text which reads "And vice versa!". End ID)

I made a typo in the meme but I can't be assed to fix it lol.

[aggravatedaroallo-forpositivity]

You know what?

For those gay/lesbian/bi/pan/other words heteromantics out there.

I'm proud of you. You're not being predatory, you're not having internal homophobia, you're not being homophobic yourselves. You're just being you, and I'm proud of you. You're a part of the community, and you always will be.

[purple-mothman-majesty]

none of the arguments you listed are the ones we actually make. the argument is cis straight people aren’t queer. cis straight aces aren’t queer. lgbt aces are.

it’s not aphobic because aces aren’t being excluded—cis straight people are being excluded.

This isn't really a question, but I'm going to answer because someone may find it helpful.

The examples I listed are often used, (especially the oppression one) but the argument Anon mentioned is probably the most common one. I didn't include it though because I wanted to keep things lighthearted, pointing out the ironic, self-contradictory arguments. Whereas Anon's argument isn't as comical. But now that we're here, we might as well talk about it...

°✧*Rant time°✧*。

Heteromantic aces are not straight. Straight means you are heteromantic and heterosexual.

The fact that they can be romantically attracted to someone not of their gender doesn't cancel out their asexuality or make them suddenly relate to straight people's experience. They still experience sexuality differently than straight people. It doesn't they are safe from aphobia just because they're heteromantic. They still need a safe place away from the people who want to "fix" us. Believe it or not, the straights™ hate cishet aces too. Because they're still ace. they're still queer.

If someone is bi they aren't suddenly straight just because they experience heterosexuality along side homosexuality. Cis gay allos are cis & allo like straight people but that doesn't make them straight because they're gay. Similarly, cishet aces are cis & hetero like cis straight people, but they're not straight because they're ace. It's okay to have a couple of things in common with straight people, you're still queer.

What a lot of people don't realize (probably due to lack of representation) is that being ace or aro is its own unique experience even if you are hetero as well. Especially in the sex-obsessed, amatonormative world we live in.

Sometimes other queer people only focus on the hetero aspect of it, ignoring the fact that asexuality and aromantism are inherently queer on their own. Allos seem to separate it in their minds and think about it like this: "Look! That person is a

H E T E R O M A N T I C asexual. "

As if the asexuality doesn't completely change the way they experience the hetero attraction anyway. Their asexuality isn't just about what they don't feel, it's also about the way it effects what they do feel. Being ace is so much more nuanced than just "people who feel little to no sexual attraction." I can't explain all of it but, another thing about being aspec is, it feels like you're looking at life through a completely different lense. and understandably, if you aren't aspec and don't know much about aspecs' experiences, how are you supposed to know that? (Not that ignorance excuses aphobia)

Most hetero aces say that before they knew what asexuality was, they always had thoughts like, *"I'm really bad at being straight, I must be doing it wrong." Or *"I must be broken, I can't relate to straight people or gay people." Or *they just think they're bi until they figure it out ages later. And if they were straight they wouldn't even have to explain their sexuality to straight people in the first place. I imagine hearing someone call them straight must be baffling. Like, you've got to be kidding me!

*sidenote: straight people don't have those thoughts

I've even seen many gay and mspec aces and aros say that the aspec side of their identity makes them feel more queer and that it affects more things for them than their homo or mspec identity. Of course not all of them feel that way but it just goes to show you that even gay aspecs can tell you that being aro or ace is inherently queer.

Lastly aspecs have been part of the lgbtqia+ community since the beginning, even before the words asexual and aromantic existed. People can argue all they want but it doesn't change anything. You don't get to choose what other people identify as or whether they are in the community or not, that's up to each individual. They're here, they're queer let's give them a cheer! 🎉 🏳️‍🌈 👏👏👏

If you read this far, have some cake:

🍰 🍰 🍰

[azar-rosethorn]

Random TDIS Headcanons: Updated LGBTQ Headcanons

Blossom - Asexual Lesbian (She/her)

Bubbles - Pansexual (She/her)

Buttercup - Genderfluid Demiromantic Lesbian (She/he/they)

Brick - Mspec Unlabeled (he/him)

Boomer - Bisexual Demiboy (he/they)

Butch - Aroace Non-Binary (he/they)

Bunny - Biromantic Asexual (she/her)

Bullet - Bigender Pansexual (she/he)

HIM - Gay, Genderfluid (any pronouns

Bliss - Aroace Agender (any pronouns)

Quinn Morbucks - Lesbian (she/her)

Lilith - Omnisexual (any pronouns)

(Alright, speed round)

Andrea - Poly

Ace - Transmasc

Snake & Grubber- Non-Binary

Lil Arturo & Big Billy - Demiboys

Mojo - Bi

Professor - Heteromantic Ace

Berserk - Bi

Brat - Omni

Brute - Abrosexual

Sedusa - Bi

Mask Scara - Pan

[wearequeer-andwearehere]

Hi Aryan i love your blog and everything you do for the community! happy pride month!! so i have a question, I’ve always been switching between identifying as bi, pan, and omni, sometimes lesbian. but lately i’ve been questioning and i came to realize that im sexually attracted to women, and not men. but i can only picture myself in a romantic relationship with dudes, not girls. is it a thing to be heteroromantic and homosexual? or would that still be mspec?

Hi there my friend!! And thank you, happy pride month to you too my friend!!

It is possible to be heteromantic and homosexual, and you could also label yourself as mspec since that is attraction to more than one gender

However, it’s possible that you might be experiencing internalised lesbophobia?

Like think about it *why* is it that you can’t picture yourself in a relationship with a woman? Have you ever been romantically attracted to a man? When you picture yourself with dudes do you enjoy it?

It is possible to have different romantic and sexual orientations, but I’d say think about it a bit first, bc it’s possible it might be internalised stuff.

[friedloverballoon]

Yoo what do you think about pansexuality?? or the split attraction model? I don't particularly agree with pansexuality. When people explain it it just sounds like bisexuality but with extra steps. The split attraction model, it makes sense to me, I guess?

Also it's fine to change your views, dude. TBH the pandemic has kinda rotted my brain and made me a weird opinionated guy. Had nothing much to do so why not dive into some weird LGBT rabbithole 💀Plus, being pissed a lot the time is no bueno. Me being kinda busy also helps me not to give a shit.

I love questions like this because I really like talking about myself.

Just kiddinggg, I don't think I've talked too much about pansexuality on here, but in my opinion, it's the only mspec (that's the right term, right) label that actually makes sense. Like, there are so many labels that literally mean the exact same as bisexual (and make shit up about bisexuality, which has existed longer than most of them have been alive). And even though I give some of them the benefit of the doubt, I've seen way too many of the people who identify as omnisexual or polysexual admit that they just like the flag better. I know that's not the case for all, but, like…c'mon guys, there's no difference. Even if there was a miniscule difference, I'd consider it, but there aren't any 💀

Pansexuality, I'm still a bit "eh" about, but I've come to understand it as just a sublabel under bisexuality that describes having no gender preferences or leans of any kind. Aka, if you're pan, you're inherently also bi, but not all bisexuals are pansexual. And again, more respectful of what people identify as now, so I won't roll my eyes if someone tells me they're pan or omnisexual (and I'll understand what they mean and be kind about it), but if someone tells me they're a heteromantic panplatonic polysexual, my only possible reaction would be "oh 😀"

I actually had to look up what the split attraction model was. For a time, I called myself heteroromantic homosexual, then switched one to bi, then eventually just let myself be completely bi, and that was how it went for me, but I'm sure there are some people whose romantic preferences don't match their sexual preferences. So yeah, I agree with it if it means what I think it does.

And I am so glad you understand my change of opinions 💖 I'm really thankful that my eyes are open to how people are radicalized online. One of the dominos that pushed me to be tolerant and truly just open my mind more was being in a very large group of people in person, and it was eye-opening to be around so many different people who experienced something differently than I did. Things people say are skewed online, and there's this ever-present idea that you have to be one or the other, categorized in a "good or bad" type of thing. I fully support the "too busy to give a shit" part too, I get it 😭

[xxcalicofemmexx]

bi straight wallpapers!

Bi Straight: Someone who identifies as bi and straight. An intentionally vague term, for a broad umbrella that community can gather under. Mostly used by multigender, genderfluid, and otherwise nonbinary individuals, though it is not a closed label. Also known as bi het.

[isopod-chan]

Some fellow queer artists have been drawing their OCs as nyan pride cats so I did the same with my mlp OC Drama Queen!

[raskies456]

anyway happy pride to:

cishet aromatics

cis asexual heteromantics

genderqueer and trans heterosexual/romantics

genderqueer and trans people who identify with their agab partially/in addition to other identities/most of the time

cishet intersex people who choose to identify as queer

cis mspec people who are mainly attracted to other genders

literally everyone and anyone who has ever been told or felt like their identity isn’t queer enough

[questioning-culture-is]

Questioning culture is having used SO MANY FUCKING LABELS AND NONE OF THEM FELT RIGHT. First I thought I was straight. Then pan. Then bi. Then straight ace. Then just plain ol straight. Then bi again. Then heteromantic pansexual. Then abrosexual. Then pomosexual grey ace. Then heteroflexible. Then quoisexual. I have decided 5 minutes ago that I am an mspec straight on the asexual spectrum, this can not go wrong in anyway. This spans from ages 12 to 16 btw

I also constantly feel insecure that I might just be a straight person invading the community because my identity tends to lean pretty strongly in that direction but "straight" has never felt right in the same way that everything else has never felt right.

.

[bequeerdodopemonkshit]

Dear Tumblr, RE: Recommending TERF blogs to me

Thank you.

If it isn't abundantly clear yet I'm...

Trans and Non Binary inclusive.

Aspec Positive and I believe they deserve to be in queer spaces (yes, even heteromantic asexuals and yes even heterosexual aromantics -- no, I'm not not about to explain why -- I said what I said).

Neopronouns Affirming.

Mspec Friendly

Anti-Racist, Anti-Truscum, Anti-Exclusionist and basically if you're a fucking bigot fuck all the way off

Someone who believes TERF and Queer are not slurs (this I will actually debate because the history of words, specifically how words are used in subcultures is a focus of mine and I love to bring receipts)

Vehemently queer inclusive

Pro Being Queer as Fuck and doing crimes

Supportive of people who steal from Wal-Mart

Pro Prison Abolition

Sex Positive and Pro Sex Work (Specifically listening to sex workers before making laws that impact them as it's fucking work and they should have the same protections as workers do)

Still learning so this list while subject to change will only become more inclusive.

Now, Tumblr, can I please just get back to writing queer fanfiction and getting too excited about things that me and five other people know about? Please?

[gaymingbinosaur]

Reasons people are cishet from what I've seen on tumblr

1) being cis heteromantic and heterosexual

2) shipping m/f ships or the wrong gay ships

3) mspec people in oppoisite gender relationships

4) someone is ace

5) someone is aro

6) someone is nonbinary

7) dating someone who is nonbinary but looks like the opposite gender of you so it's a cishet relationship

8) disagreeing with someone

Like minus all the straight culture jokes about abuse or slut shaming women but it's okay since it only applies to the hets. I am so damn paranoid about the term cisher. Which is a shame because it is a good word but it's been so misused I don't know if your talking about someone who is allo, cis and hetero or if someone annoyed you.