#moving to la. bringing chris with him. and buck. and now he will go back on all of those decisions because he wants so badly to be a part

[heygirltimeformorning]

can i go where you go

This is inspired by this text post from @buckdiazlafd - thank you thank you thank you - and is posted with their permission.

enjoy~*

*

The last 24-hours have been a real shit-show. Buck is pretty sure Eddie being crushed by a mudslide less than 48 hours after announcing he was looking at houses in El Paso is a sign from the universe that Eddie should not move to El Paso, but Buck’s learned not to bring the universe up with Eddie, because Eddie doesn’t believe in the universe, not like that, and, well, Buck had major mine flashbacks when Eddie had shot him one wild, helpless look, and then disappeared under, like, ten feet of mud.

Maybe that’s dramatic. Buck hadn’t whipped out his ruler (he doesn’t carry a ruler -- quit looking at him like that, Chim) to measure how many feet of mud it had been, but it had been enough that something icy and cold and really fucking terrible had grabbed ahold of Buck’s heart and squeezed, and Buck had thought: not again, you bitch at the universe, because Eddie might not believe in the universe, but Buck does, and Buck has learned to have a healthy respect for the universe and all its screaming.

The point is: Eddie had been crushed by mud and debris, and Buck (because he’s Buck) had dug through the mud until his fingers were bleeding (stop looking at him like that, Bobby) to get to him, hauling him out of the ground like one of those Harry Potter plants, only Eddie hadn’t been screaming, he’d been silent, and Buck’s chest felt like it was caving in.

It turns out that getting crushed by 10 feet of mud (or however much mud and debris Eddie had been crushed by -- again, Buck hadn’t had his ruler stop looking at him like that, Chim -- is not exactly compatible with life. Eddie hadn’t been dead -- Buck’s heart plummets to his toes and starts screaming like one of the Harry Potter plants at the thought of that -- but he’d been hurt badly enough to need surgery and Buck had sat in the waiting room next to Bobby, hair wet and plastered to his forehead, looking pitiful enough that Hen had wrapped one of the emergency blankets around his shoulders, which really completed the look, and thought if Eddie dies, I have to move to El Paso for Christopher which, look.

It’s not like Buck hadn’t thought about moving to El Paso when Eddie had dropped that particular bomb in his life a day or so ago (Eddie had said he was looking at houses in El Paso, and Buck had thought please stay please stay please stay - I’ll come with you before he said Eddie needed help finding houses) but it hadn’t been moving to El Paso to take care of Chris because Eddie had been killed by ten feet (or whatever, fuck off, Chim) of mud. That wasn’t the plan.

Buck isn’t sure what the plan was, but El Paso wasn’t involved, not beyond getting Chris’ punk ass back to LA, and the mudslide killing Eddie also wasn’t part of the plan -- but Eddie wasn’t dead (not-dead, not-dead, not-dead, his heart echoes) and El Paso was put on hold and Chris -- fuck. He hadn’t thought about Chris. Well, he had -- Chris is always just kind of in the back of his mind -- but he hadn’t thought about the mudslide and Eddie and Chris as like, a unit, and, well. Fuck.

That isn’t a problem he has to solve right now, he thinks. That isn’t something he has to do right now. Eventually? Yes. He needs to tell Chris that Eddie was crushed by a mudslide, and that he had surgery and that -- that -- what? That he needs to get his punk ass back to LA? Ideally, yes. Point being: that isn’t something Buck has to solve right now.

What he does have to solve right now is the fact that Hen has brought him a tshirt and a pair of sweats from the firehouse and is giving him one of her mom looks (Buck feels bad for Denny and Mara), pointing to the bathroom with a look that said that if Buck didn’t go of his own volition, he’d be taken there by force, and Buck did have one very confusing sex dream about Hen once (when he first started at the firehouse), but he doesn’t want to get on her bad side (her worse side), so he takes the clothes and goes.

Hen makes him drink a coffee, a bottle of water, and a sandwich, because she’s a bossy lesbian, and then Buck sits and waits, and thinks about the universe and Eddie and screaming. And Chris. He thinks about Chris, too, and when the surgeon comes out and says Diaz, Buck stands up so fast he knocks his half-empty cup of coffee over because he’s never been great at coordinating his limbs, but Hen takes care of it for him and Bobby has a hand on his shoulder, and the surgeon says everything went well, he’s still pretty out of it, but he’ll be okay and something finally loosens in Buck’s chest.

And then the nurse shows him back to Eddie’s room, and Buck has kind of gotten used to this - he thinks he knows what to expect - but then  he gets to the door of the room and Eddie’s face splits into an easy grin -- he’s so much lighter like this (yes, Chim, without the 10 feet of mud, but also metaphorically) -- and Buck’s breath catches in his chest and, look.

Buck has known he’s in love with Eddie since Eddie opened the door in a pink oxford and tighty-whiteys, mustache-less and flushed with joy, so beautiful it’s like a physical ache Buck can press his thumb into, make it hurt when he’s alone, when he’s alone in his loft and it’s night and he’s hard and just once, he’ll just think about him once, nobody has to know -- Buck has known, is the point. Buck is a little slow on the uptake, but he isn’t stupid, and he’s known he’s in love with Eddie Diaz. It’s just. Well, what do people do when they’re in love with their straight best friends? Google says get over it -- so Buck’s trying. Only when he steps into Eddie’s hospital room and Eddie beams at him like Buck is the best thing he’s ever seen, well, fuck. Google didn’t have any advice about that.

“There he is,” Eddie half-slurs, and he’s smiling like -- like -- well, Buck doesn’t have a metaphor for this, because Eddie makes his brain feel like it’s on fire, like the Inside Out people in his brain are trying to process and come up with an emotion and the only thing they have to offer is: yes. Him. That one. Want. which is not exactly helpful. 

“H-Hey, bud,” Buck manages, unsticking his tongue from the roof of his mouth, sitting down next to Eddie’s bed. Eddie’s hospital gown is slipping off his shoulders, and he’s still got the nasal cannula on, and he’s blinking slowly, and his pupils are huge, but he’s smiling and Buck’s heart keeps malfunctioning. “How’re you feeling?”

“Better now you’re here,” Eddie says, and he’s so light like this, and Buck freezes. One of the Inside Out people in his brain is shredding everything Buck knows to make room for this moment, for Eddie’s joy, unbridled and bright, spilling out across them. “Fuck, you’re handsome,” he says, shaking his head, turning to the nurse when she, smirking, goes to check his lines. “Isn’t he handsome? I told you, didn’t I? I told -- I told you.”

Buck is pretty sure his brain is offline. There’s been a gas leak or something, and all the Inside Out people are dead, because he hadn’t considered this -- hadn’t considered any of this. What was supposed to happen was Buck was supposed to come back here, curls fluffy and air-dried, in his borrowed sweats, with coffee breath, and Eddie would be still and quiet in the bed, and Buck would sit down and shove down every single feeling he’s ever had about Eddie because Eddie is straight and he’d try to convince himself that the feelings he has for Eddie are purely platonic (knowing they aren’t) and Eddie would wake up and ask about Chris and - and -- look, Buck knows how this goes, and Eddie being higher than a kite and spilling joy like he hadn’t been pulled like a half-dead mandrake from the mud six hours ago by Buck isn’t how it goes.

Maybe he’s dreaming, he thinks. Maybe this is some fucked up dream his brain has created to help deal with the inevitable moving of Eddie to El Paso. Maybe he’s finally lost it, and now he won’t be able to look Eddie in the eye for, like, a day, because all he’ll be able to think about is in the dream you loved me enough to stay and Buck doesn’t want to be that selfish and he’s ashamed that his subconscious is.

But then the nurse laughs and says: “You did tell me,” in the tone of voice people use with little kids and patients high on pain medications. “I half-expected Brad Pitt to walk in here, the way you were carrying on,” she adds, and Buck’s cheeks flush. 

“Psh,” Eddie says, and his eyes are slow to track, but they drift back across the room, from the nurse to Buck, and Buck feels something squeeze in his chest. “Buck’s so much better than Brad Pitt,” he says, and Buck’s hand is on the side of the bed, because that’s what you do when someone’s in the hospital, you rest a hand on the side of their bed, and they look over at you, and you say I was so worried and they say something fucked up like I’m not worth worrying about and -- but Buck’s brain short-circuits then, because Eddie laces their fingers together, and Buck can’t even blink because what the fuck kind of hallucination is this?

The nurse shoots Buck a fond little look, and finishes whatever she’s doing with the medications. “Alright, Mr. Diaz,” she says and Eddie rolls his head to the side to look up at her. “That pain medication should hold you for awhile - but you just have your partner--” Buck’s heart leaps into his throat, and he can’t say anything, he can’t even blink -- “grab me if you need something else, alright?”

Eddie turns back to Buck. “Hear that?” he asks, like the nurse isn’t still standing right there. “She thinks we’re partners. Like, actual partners.” He waggles his eyebrows, and forget blinking, Buck can’t breathe. “Like I’d be so lucky.”

“We’ll -- we’ll let you know if we need anything,” Buck says, and his voice is high-pitched and unnatural sounding, but it’s literally the best he can do under the circumstances, because what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck Eddie is holding his hand and calling him handsome and hot and seems -- well, whatever this is -- about them being partners in the sense that gay people and woke straight people use. The nurse is gone with a rasp of the curtain and a flick of the lights, and then Buck and Eddie are alone -- well, in a manner of speaking -- and Eddie’s looking at Buck like - like - like that.

“You should rest,” Buck says finally, when he manages to peel the Inside Out people in his brain off the ceiling. “You need to rest, you were -- I pulled you out of the mud. Like a mandrake.”

Eddie frowns at the reference, a confused little divot between his brows, but then he grins, shrugging a shoulder. The hospital gown slips off his shoulder a little bit more. Slut, Buck’s brain supplies when Buck thinks about biting that shoulder, which is so inappropriate in at least five ways Buck can think of off the top of his head. “You’re always saving me,” he says, and his words are tripping together in a way that says he probably won’t be awake much longer.

“Yeah, well, that’s my job, right?” Buck says, picking over the words carefully, like he’s disarming a bomb. Eddie’s still holding his hand. Buck isn’t exactly doing anything to discourage the hand holding, and then he feels dirty and wrong and like a pervert. “Gotta keep you alive,” he adds quietly, and pulls his hand back very carefully.

Eddie tightens his fingers around Buck’s. “Gotta -- look like a hot badass doing it,” he says with a little grin. “Shame I’m usually unconscious. I bet it’s really sexy, all the -- mangrove pulling.”

Buck’s still focused on the fact that he’d tried to pull his hand away and Eddie had, essentially, said no, so it takes him a minute to catch up -- tripping first over hot badass and then sexy and by the time he gets to the missed reference of mandrake, he barely manages to say: “uh-huh” in response.

“Is that right? Mangrove?” Eddie asks with a frown. “That doesn’t sound right. What did you call me? A man- a man --”

“Mandrake,” Buck says -- croaks, and Eddie nods. 

“Right,” Eddie says, “Mandrake. Whatever that is. Is it cute, at least?” he asks, grinning at Buck again, and Buck’s heart is malfunctioning again.

“Uh,” Buck says, very eloquently, and then he’s saved from having to say anything else by the arrival of Hen and Chim and Bobby, all of whom seem to notice the hand-holding, and chalk it up to either something they don’t need to address right now, or something that is just so uniquely buckandeddie that it doesn’t phase them, and Buck is so thankful that the universe decided to give him half a break, because Chimney giving Eddie a shovel talk about his baby brother in law while Eddie’s high on pain medication is not something Buck is capable of coping with right now. Only then, as Bobby, Hen, and Chimney file in, Eddie’s face breaks into one of those heartbreakingly beautiful smiles and Buck thinks: shit because high-on-pain-medication Eddie is either incredibly gay, incredible horny, incredibly unfiltered, or all of the above.

“Hey guys,” Eddie says, lifting the hand that doesn’t have a grip on Buck’s. “Hey, does Buck look -- like, really sexy when he’s pulling me like a mangrove?” and Buck is pretty sure they could use his face to power a small compound because what the fuck, Eddie. 

“Pulling a what?” Chimney asks, and thank every single god there is for Bobby because he clears his throat and steps in.

“Sounds like you’re in good hands, Eddie,” Bobby says in that calm, measured way of his. “We just wanted to check on you. We’ll see you tomorrow. Get some rest,” he says, and then he gives Chimney and Hen one of his dad looks -- which trumps Hen’s bossy lesbian looks -- and marches them out, but not before Eddie smirks and says: oh, I’m in great hands.

(24 hours later, when the pain medication has worn off and Eddie has come down a bit, when Buck realizes this hasn’t just been some strange stress dream as a reaction to Eddie moving to El Paso, when Chimney has text Buck approximately 74 times, Eddie says I meant it and something in Buck’s chest splits open, spills out between them, and Eddie is blushing, and Buck is blushing, but they kiss anyway, and Buck says go get Chris’ punk ass -- but stay and Eddie says only if you keep saving me and Buck says only because you saved me first and he thinks: take that, universe.)

*

you can also read this on the ao3 :)

[poolofunidentifiedfluid]

i am feeling the inexplicable sadness™

[pinkponydiaz]

forget baking, buck bought a motorcycle to distract himself every time he wants to tell eddie not to go, eddie goes anyway, i cannot get over the idea that he doesn’t tell chris that he’s moving, just that he’ll be visiting, because eddie is a crazy girl like that, and on like day 3 he hasn’t heard from buck, he brings chris to the new place to see his room, chris freaks on him ‘what do you mean we live here now what happened to our house???’ and eddie realizes he made choices for everyone again without actually asking what people wanted, and he calls buck to talk it through after chris storms into his new room and slams the door but buck isn’t answering, and eddie knows it’s been different that last couple of days since he got here, but buck was still texting him back, and he knows today is the middle of 48 off, so what is buck doing that he won’t answer, maybe buck is finally admitting to himself he’s pissed at eddie about this, eddie considers what this move is doing to buck if eddie didn’t ever want to move back to el paso, chris doesn’t want to live there and wants their house back in la, and buck didn’t want eddie and chris to be a thousand miles away, and now eddies sure that buck is upset with him and that’s why he’s not answering but buck is not answering because his motorcycle went under a semi, and he’s currently being life flighted off the 110, with his phone laying on the asphalt, face up, a picture of eddie looking goofy as f from the bachelor party flashing on the screen.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Eddie diaz isn’t going to actually move to Texas - oh he’ll probably get close - but he won’t actually go - because it’s running away again - which is what Eddie does when he’s faced with something life changing.

He ran to Shannon to escape his parents (especially his mom)

Then he ran to the army when Shannon got pregnant

Then he ran to the army once again when Chris was diagnosed

Then he ran to LA to escape his parents once more

Then he ran back to Shannon

Then he ran from his grief

He ran from his trauma

Ran from the 118

Ran from his feelings

And now he’s running again - he thinks he’s running towards Chris but he’s actually running away from himself - from joy and freedom - because he thinks it’s the only way to get Chris back - to go back to living under the toxic cloud that is his parents - to go back to being made to feel like a failure (because Helena is going to say I told you so at the first opportunity!)

Eddie is watching Chris and seeing him get the childhood with his parents he never had - one where he was loved and supported and allowed to be a child. Only that’s Eddie’s perspective and Eddie (like Buck) is a flawed narrator of his own life - Chris isn’t actually happy he’s basically getting the same treatment Eddie got from Helen and Ramon - he’s being stiffled - suffocated and he is not being given the right support - the support to work through his trauma and not let it fester.

But Eddie only sees Chris being taught chess by the man who was absent from Eddie’s own childhood, Chris being able to be involved in clubs and tournaments and getting to make friends and be a child.

Eddie doesn’t see that he was already providing all of that for Chris am more - providing him with the love and support and tools to deal with what life throws at him.

Eddie wants in on what he was already doing and doing much better so he’s going to probably go to Texas for a bit and open the dialoge and then reload moving back to Texas just keeps the cycle going (Eddie’s own version of the hamster wheel) and it would reinforce to Chris that running is the answer. That being unhappy is the answer

Ultimately Eddie needs to realise that he can fight to get Chris back without sacrificing all he has been working towards - without sacrificing all the progress he has made. That actually making the first move doesn’t mean abandoning the life he has been building for himself and his son.

Because Chris isn’t actually happy - he’s miserable and he wants his dad - he just isn’t able to admit that yet but they’re going to get to a point where he is - because Eddie has been doing the right things and they will have a conversation in Texas that will bring them both home to LA ;and Buck) and the family they have built.

[carolinahope]

Both Eddie and the show are acting as though there are only two possibilities for Eddie when it comes to Chris. Stay in LA and miss out on his life. Or move to Texas. When there is a very valid and correct third option, of Eddie going to Texas, having it out with his parents and his son and bring Chris back home. Where they both belong.

And I hope someone knocks some sense into him and reminds him of this. Ideally Maddie or Athena, or the absolutely glorious option of Karen.

I just know it won't be Buck. Because he would set himself on fire to keep Eddie warm even if it burns them both to the ground. And he is also in his own spiral. His ability to think clearly is even worse than Eddie's right now.

[dorkydegeneracy]

It's crazy that we were all tossing around these theories about how Eddie was going to get Chris back, and arguably one of the more obvious solutions, Eddie returning to El Paso all together to be with Chris, never crossed our minds.

Because let's be honest. IRL this isn't a terrible decision. It's actually quite a good one, considering Chris is seemingly thriving in Texas and all of his blood family is there (radio silence from Tia Pepa and Abuelita (didn't abuela move back to Texas, or is that fanon? The lines between fic and reality are Heavily blurred)). Uprooting Chris' life again would be unnecessarily cruel. Stability is of paramount importance right now after the tumultuous life Chris has had.

There are really only two things that make this idea nonsensical:

1) Eddie moving to El Paso is not going to fix his relationship with his son. He's doing it purely for himself because he is missing out on his son's most formative year. (See #2 for more insight on this.). But Chris doesn't need Eddie to move to El Paso permanently. He needs Eddie to come to terms with why he continues to make these reckless mistakes that affect Chris in a real way. Chris needs Eddie to stop trying to replace Shannon. Chris needs Eddie to move on and be happy so he can be an even better father. Which brings me to. . .

2(a)) Eddie believes that moving to El Paso is going to make him happy because Chris is there. But he is sorrily mistaken. The priest gave him the assignment to stop punishing himself and allow himself to feel joy. And he is choosing to move so that he can be happier by not missing Chris's milestone moments. He's going about the assignment the wrong way. Yes Chris should and does make him happy, but that's not the only thing that makes Eddie happy. It would be incredibly unhealthy if this was true. Eddie LOVES being a fire fighter. Eddie LOVES his fire fam* (more than he likes his parents). And. . .

2(b)) EDDIE LOVES BUCK. There are a million reasons why Eddie loves Buck. But one in particular was illuminated last episode that I don't think the show has ever teased at before.

Listen, I know we are all obsessed with Buck having his own crisis, but this was the most striking part of the entire scene for me. DO Y'ALL SEE THIS FACE? This is the face of a man who was afraid to let his "best friend" know that he was planning on moving to El Paso to be with his son because he knows that Buck is going through a tough time right now. He didn't want to add another stone to the pile. But Buck isn't a guest in Eddie's house, so he took a peak and ripped the band-aid off. And Buck had the nerve to be 1000% supportive of Eddie's decision. So Eddie makes that 👆🏾face because he CANNOT BELIEVE that Buck would be so selfless. He thinks it's crazy that somebody would unquestionably help him be happy in Buck's scenario.

Eddie, I'm just saying, what we all just saw is HUSBAND-like behavior from Buck. And I know you didn't see the whole thing, and you don't know this, but you have just flipped Buck's world upside down. Your man is dying on the inside. Because BUCK LOVES YOU. But he doesn't know that yet. And he doesn't want to pull you away from your son. Who is also his son. So yeah.

*NOTE: The fire fam is not the same as actual blood family at least not for Chris. I get it, Helena obviously does not have Eddie's interest at heart, which is why her and Ramon taking Chris for three months is cruel, but I think the show is trying to suggest that Chris is indeed thriving in El Paso where he is surrounded by his aunts, uncles, cousins and other family. Those bonds are unique and important. Even if Helena Diaz is conniving. The fire fam in my mind is more crucial for Eddie. Not that the fire fam aren't amazing and provide a comforting familial sense in LA, but. . . you get what I mean. It's just different. Especially since Eddie actually has a big family back home, not all of which he is maligned.

[morganski-19]

911 Season 8b predictions and wishes

now that filming is started and we're going to get some very minimal bts and clues to where the season is going to go, I thought I'd share my predictions now. I do want to specify that my predictions are different than my wishes, which are less likely to happen but still probable, but I still would love it if they do. This is all just fun speculation.

Predictions:

Ravi is confirmed to be back (yay), but the reason that he is back is he is filling in for Eddie while he's in Texas. Then he will go back to the kinda rotating role he had in previous seasons where he just filled in for anyone not working that day.

Eddie is going to spend an extended period of time in El Paso and take a leave of absence from the 118, but has plans to come back

Before actually selling his house in LA, something happens where he realizes that there are too many memories in the house and too much of a life here, and he doesn't want to give it up. He will realize that moving to LA wasn't just good for himself, but for Chris too, and that LA can still be their home.

Towards the second half of 8b, we're going to get an episode called El Paso, like Boston in s5

Chris comes home

Buck is going to have a few hookups trying to figure himself out, but it just freaks him out more. This leads to him talking to someone and understanding his sexuality more

Maddie will have some sort of complication in her pregnancy, but it's treatable and the baby is ok (this is me manifesting that the baby will be ok)

We're going to see more of the Wilson family. Hen and Karen are going to have a discussion about whether or not they want to keep fostering, or if this is it for them.

Bobby and Athena will have at least three disagreements over their new house

The season finale episodes (the last two) will include an NDE of one of the characters, my thoughts are probably Buck

Either Buck or Eddie has a feelings realization, but it will be toward the end of the last episode and will be one of the cliffhangers between seasons

Wishes

Buck has a conversation with Hen about his sexuality, and what that means for him

The kidnapper doesn't take Maddie, or just solely Maddie, they take someone else

Chim gets a new storyline

Hen gets a new storyline

Eddie yells at his parents

We see more of the call center, specifically bringing back Sue and Linda

Mention of the bees (cause why not)

May and Harry cameo

Eddie starts to question his sexuality, but it'll primarily be a season 9 plot

[itsactuallycorrine]

force

buddie; 1.1K words; eddie-centric angst; s08e06 spec

part 1 of the series

The call with the toddler in the well doesn’t trigger Eddie. 

It should. It should remind him of being buried alive, gasping for air, lost and alone, cut off from the people who mattered most. It should remind him of being taken from Christopher too soon. It should bring on a panic attack, or give him hives, or at least set him back on his heels a little. 

Or maybe it should inspire him, remind him why he fought so hard to escape last time, the strength of will he’d found thinking about Christopher and the family they’d built in LA. How he knew if he didn’t come back from that, Christopher would be alone, how he’d have to live with his grandparents and be raised like Eddie was—one of Eddie’s greatest fears. 

Instead all he feels is tired.

It’s been over four long, tough years since that first well call. In the engine on the way back to the station, he takes silent inventory of his life now, compares it to then, and while it’s different in many ways—it is different, he knows it is—it also drives home how little progress he’s made, no matter how hard he’s been trying. Like nothing has mattered, not almost dying at least twice, not trying to move on, not therapy. Nothing. 

He looks around at his team, his friends, and wonders what the hell is wrong with him. While he’s stagnated, Chim has lost and found Maddie, had a daughter, and gotten married. Hen has made it most of the way through med school and finally been able to add to her family. Bobby has struggled and persevered, found closure, and now he and Athena seem better than ever. Buck literally died and then had a whole sexuality revelation.

But Eddie? He’s still stuck there, frantically beating against the walls around him, crying out where no one can hear him, cut off from the most vital part of himself. Fighting a war of attrition against life and losing, losing, always losing. 

Hopelessness pulls at his limbs as he showers and changes into a fresh uniform, as he pours himself a cup of coffee, and smiles and laughs in all the right places while the team bustles around him. He knows this feeling, knows how seductive it can be to give up. He’s been resisting its siren song all summer. He flirted with the edge of this despair not even three years ago. If it hadn’t been for how bad he’d scared Christopher…

But Christopher isn’t there anymore to call Buck when Eddie can’t find his own way back. He can’t depend on Chris to ask for the help that Eddie can’t ask for himself. He has to learn how to ask, to say it himself. 

The words are on the tip of his tongue the rest of the shift. They crowd his mouth, pressed up tight against his teeth, and he aches to loosen his jaw and let them go. Instead, he bites down. 

In the end, it doesn’t matter.

They’re called out again. This one, a jumper on top of an office building, which just figures given Eddie’s current mental state.

Even better, they find out shortly that the jumper is going through a very messy, very contested divorce.

Eddie stands at the ready while Chim and Bobby confer with the almost ex-husband on the ground, trying to block out the sounds of Bobby and Athena working in tandem to talk the vic off the literal edge. Trying not to think about anything at all. 

A little gets through, though. It’d be impossible to keep it all out and do the job effectively. 

He hears Athena talking about how divorce doesn’t mean giving up, and it’s nothing to be ashamed of. He hears Bobby say how letting go can be a second chance at a life, a happiness you never knew was possible, even if you’ll always mourn what you’ve lost. He hears the ex-husband apologizing, saying, “I’ll always love you, even if it’s not in the same way, even if our marriage ended.”

And something within Eddie cracks wide open. 

He keeps it together as they bring the victim down unharmed, as they deflate the safety air cushion and pack up, as they wind down the shift and go their separate ways.

At home, with no one to hide from, he shatters. 

He thinks of Shannon telling him she wants a divorce, of the anger and hurt he packed away, buried beneath his grief. He thinks of that fucking letter again, the one she left Christopher, without leaving anything for him, any kind of clue of what he’d done wrong or why they couldn’t work it out.

He’s always tried to be so fair to Shannon in death to make up for how he fell short while she was alive. Tried to make up for his parents’ scorn. Tried not to speak ill of her to Christopher, so he always remembers the mom who was there for him, the mom who made smores and surprised him on Christmas and read him stories at night.

But in being fair to Shannon, he wonders…he wonders if he hasn’t been a little unfair to himself, too. 

He’s allowed to be mad that she left him alone with Christopher while he was struggling with PTSD and recovering from his injuries.

He’s allowed to be mad that she didn’t reach out to him for three full years after leaving, that he had to take the initiative to bring her back into their lives.

He’s allowed to be hurt and confused that she came back into his life, fell back into his bed, and then asked him for a divorce when he wanted to recommit.

He’s allowed to be a little relieved about it, too, that she wanted out and asked him for a way, when he wouldn’t have, couldn’t have, and would’ve kept them encased in their mutual misery forever.

He’s allowed to see Shannon, their relationship, in shades of gray—they were both right and they were both wrong, and they were kids and they were both forced to grow up too soon, and they made a beautiful miracle together but they both ran from it, from him. 

Eddie sits on the floor of his living room, head hanging between his knees, and he lets it all go, lets it roll through him, sobs shaking his body, until he’s heaving.

“Eddie?” he hears, and doesn’t try to hide as Buck drops down beside him. He hadn’t even heard the front door and there is no Christopher to make the call, but somehow it doesn’t surprise Eddie that Buck just…knows to be there.

Bucks wraps an arm around his shoulders, not saying a word, not asking a single question. Eddie does what he never would’ve done before. He reaches up and grabs Buck’s arm, pulling his embrace tight, a silent and shameless plea for comfort, for care. Stay.

Buck presses his face to the top of Eddie’s head, nods, and lets Eddie cry himself hoarse.

ao3

[this-is-moony-lovegood]

Just watched a buddie edit to Call Your Mom by Noah Kahan, and I’m sitting here thinking of a plot line where Buck goes by himself to get Chris.

Like Eddie is suffering back in LA and Buck is like fuck it I’m bringing Chris home because Eddie doesn’t deserve this shit. So he gets in his Jeep and he drives 800 miles to El Paso and he shows up at Helena and Ramon’s house to get Christopher. And Helena and Ramon try to fight him on this of course and Buck is chewing them out for trying to keep Chris even thought this was supposed to be temporary and all they’re doing is pushing the narrative that Eddie’s a shitty father and that Chris should stay in El Paso permanently. And Chris wakes up and sees Buck and rushes out to him and is so scared he’s here alone because Eddie is hurt or dead, and Buck just tells him that Eddie is physically okay but it’s time for Chris to come home. Buck tells him that even if he isn’t ready to stay at the Diaz house that he can stay at the loft with him, or Buck will move into the Diaz house to be a barrier if that’s what Chris wants but he needs to be back in LA. Obviously Buck is desperate but he’s also being parental, and Chris immediately goes to pack his shit so they can go home. Once against Helena and Ramon try to fight him on it, but Buck whips out the will card and says that even if Eddie is “unfit to be a parent right now” like they say, that responsibility actually goes to Buck not them and they have a problem with that they can contact his lawyer who will promptly tell them to “fuck off”.

Then, you get the drive back to LA where Chris and Buck have a full on heart to heart about Eddie. Buck talks to Chris about how his dad knows he messed up and has been trying to work on himself to fix it, but he can’t get any better with Chris if Chris isn’t willingly to put in the effort on his end. And a Chris talks about his grief over his mom and how that’s something he thought he could handle until little things keep pulling him back in like the dating plot in season 7, and obviously the Kim situation. So, Buck suggests they go the route of talking about Shannon and what Chris remembers so they spend some time talking about her in the car. The talk about her leaving (on her own and her death), and how no one will ever replace her in his life (and how he feels like his dad has been trying to do that when he dates, but all it doesn’t bring up more trauma when they break up and they leave). “I wish dad could see that he doesn’t need to replace mom in my life. I already have two parents: dad and you.” To which Buck has to pull the car over because he’s gonna lose it at his kid calling him a parent for the first time. “You, me, and dad are already a family. Why can’t both of you just understand that the three of us is all we need?” Which gets them on the topic of implying that Buck and Eddie would be dating/married for it to solely be the three of them (and a reminder that Buck has a boyfriend), to which Chris just tells him that he already knows they’re in love with each other, so why can’t they be honest about it and have dad stop dating women and Buck break up with Tommy. Which has Buck’s head spinning because, “your dad is straight, Chris” to which Chris says, “So were you four months ago, Buck. Look what happened?” And now Buck is spiraling once again because holy shit he’s in love with Eddie and maybe, just maybe Eddie’s in love with him too.

When they stop for a bathroom break Buck calls and breaks up with Tommy. Tommy knows exactly what’s happening the moment he answers, and tells him it was only a matter of time until Buck figured it out.

They get back to LA and pull up to the Diaz house. Eddie hasn’t heard from Buck is like four days so he’s been worrying because he called out of work and he never does that, but all of his words die on his tongue the moment he sees Chris. And Chris, who has barely spoken to him in the past four months barrels his way into Eddie’s arms. And Eddie breaks down crying at getting his son back. “What are you doing here? How are you here?” And Chris replies with, “Buck came and got me. He told me it was time to come home.” And Eddie just takes a moment to think that over, lets Chris go and throws himself into Buck’s arms for a massive hug. And Eddie is practically sobbing into his chest repeating “thank you” on a loop. And Buck who is an empathetic crier, just tells him, “you know I’d do anything for our family, Eds.”

They don’t kiss or anything, but Buck and Chris make eye contact over Eddie’s shoulder with a silent agreement that they’re going to figure this out. And when Eddie is ready, the three of them are going to officially be a family.

[livinginsunnyhell]

Okay but like Eddie is still punishing himself. He’s uprooting his entire life to be closer to Chris instead of having the hard conversation with him. He’s letting Chris call the shots because he’s guilty and thinks that’s the right way because he’s the one who did wrong. He needs someone (Buck) to tell him he doesn’t need to punish himself. He doesn’t have to move to a place he hates to be around his parents because he’s in the wrong. He’s just hurting and Buck needs to be his light in darkness.

And Buck needs to go after Eddie and tell him that he needs him in LA and to go get Chris. Buck has always let others dictate the relationship and has settled. Now Buck has to fight for what he wants.

I truly hope Eddie doesn’t move but in the 11th hour Buck breaks and tells Eddie that they should go to Texas together to bring Chris back and that’s the start of their relationship.

[lemotmo]

I agree Buck has made strides since his reckless days and I'm not sure if they'd want to regress him because they've talked about not wanting to regress characters in other ways. I also definitely don't like the theories about a Buck nde bringing Eddie home. Going back to LA needs to be Eddie and Chris's choice. It also wouldn't be great if hurting himself got their attention like he used to do as a kid. But... Buck being reckless and self-destructive was a core part of his character until he found out about the will, and then he changed so quickly and it was never really addressed. So it could be good if feeling like he isn't needed anymore provided an opportunity to go into that subject. Just as long as it wasn't resolved by Eddie coming back, but by realizing all the people who still love and need him. And more than that realizing he should live for himself.

Agreed. I don't want any kind of nde for either Buck or Eddie. Eddie NEEDS to go to El Paso to reconnect with his kid and we all know he'll come back to LA eventually. I just hope they'll come back because they've talked and they want to come back.

As for Buck? The guy has some serious abandonment issues and they'll definitely play a big part in him trying to cling on to whatever he had with Eddie, which is why I think he'll move into Eddie's house or something like that. That house will be the last link he has with his best friend and his kid. For years they were his support system. His very own 'found' family and now they're both gone. So yeah, I do think he'll spiral, but it remains to be seen how that will manifest itself. He could become more self-destructive yes, but he could also just pick up a strange hobby or something like that. We'll have to wait and see.

I cannot wait to see their stories unfold and ultimately come together. 🤗

[donationwayne]

Fuck It Friday

i noticed everyone is mostly doing spicy clips this fuck it friday but i haven't written any buddie smut yet so i hope everyone enjoys a snippet from my upcoming army!eddie fic coming up. It will also be my first multi-chapter fic! (this is from my first draft so if you see any typos please ignore lmaoooo)

i was tagged by @daffi-990 !!!!

Buck and Eddie moved to LA w/ Chris, shortly after Eddie was deployed overseas again. Buck is navigating raising their son on his own in a new state while working a new job and starting at the 118. Things get dicey when Eddie goes MIA overseas.

“Hey Bobby, I hate to ask this, but my Abuela broke her hip while she was watching my son. Would I be able to pick him up from the hospital? His Tia will have her hands full caring for my Abuela.” Bobby blinked at Buck, stupefied. “Your son?” Buck gave the three of them a sheepish smile, turning shy eyes on Chimney and Hen, who were staring at Buck slack-jaw. "Sorry, can you repeat that?” Chimney asked, pretending to clean out his ear with a tinge of sarcasm and shock. “I, yeah—his name is Chris. He’s 7. I’m sorry I never said anything sooner—we were still just trying to settle in. It was a huge change for us to move out here. And on top of that, I didn’t know…” “You didn’t know what it would be like here.” Hen stated. She picked up on the implication behind the half spoken thought easily. In the years since Bobby took over, the crew had grown so much closer, all wound together in one giant, occasionally dysfunctional, family. Even more so, once Athena and Bobby started dating about a year after she and Michael had officially separated. Buck wouldn’t just be introducing himself to a new family, but his son was, which was certainly intimidating. Terrifying even when it was so clear that Buck had some serious self-esteem issues. He was terrified of rejection, and adding an extra party to the equation complicated everything that much more. Buck shrugged and smiled sheepishly. “I never expected LA to become home so fast. Before I really settled in here at the station, I just wanted to be sure it was going to work before I completely committed. I needed to leave my options open in case the hours didn’t work with taking care of him. Texas and LA are extremely different environments, and even though we’d been here through my training, I still wasn’t sure if we’d find a good school.” Buck shakes his head. “I’m sorry I didn’t mention anything sooner, but we just weren’t ready.” “But you’re ready now?” Bobby asked, his expression both unreadable and soft. “Yeah,” Buck glances at the three of them flushing a little. “I really think I am.” “Wait, you’re a Texas boy?” Chim grimaces like he can’t connect the dots to Buck. Buck laughs at his befuddled expression. “Not exactly. I was born and raised in Hershey, Pennsylvania. I ended up in Texas after some traveling.” “Traveling? How did you travel with a whole ass, kid? Aren’t you only like 25?” Buck laughed while watching them struggle with the math of it all. “It's a long story.” One that he was not ready to tell, one that he would not be ready to tell until Eddie was back stateside. Until he was safe in Buck’s arms. “Well, if you want to bring him back here, you’re more than welcome to,” Bobby offered, squeezing Buck’s shoulder comfortingly. “Thank you, Bobby, and I promise this won’t be a regular occurrence.” Buck started to babble. “It's alright, Buck, now go get your son.” Bobby soothed.

I feel like a lot of people have already posted today but if anyone wants to do this who has, tag me so I can see your fic!!!!

[starbuckaroo]

ok in the spirit of not dumping a huge rant into the tags of someone else’s post I’m gonna actually make my own for once. Unfortunately or not, without the tag limit, this got really fucking long. And ended up being about more than just what that other post was talking about so.

from my pov the frustration with Eddie is in large part due to the nebulous (and frankly ridiculously long) time frame. 3 mos is better than 6 mos but the show hasn’t been clear about that and knowing Chris is there during the school year? And for how many months missing doctor appts and friends and whatnot? idk.

My biggest issue is that Eddie HAS a lot of other parent friends/coworkers/whatever and he has family in LA and Chris has a big support network in LA. For Eddie to let him go for more than a few weeks? To me?? That’s bonkers. especially given his age and the fact that as far as we know, Chris hasn’t been back to El Paso at all since they moved. (Now that’s a leap and it wouldn’t be surprising if they have made visits together but not canonical ones.)

So for him to go and stay for that long? Unprepared? Did Eddie change his will again? Write out new legal documents giving his parents temporary guardianship? those would be necessary for Chris to get medical care in another state (some insurance will allow ER visits but not PT or any routine care) and would be necessary to enroll him in school out there.

Which I’m sorry but if Eddie is serious about getting him back he would be back in therapy and reaching out to his support system for help. And I refuse to believe that chim and hen and Bobby and Buck and Pepa and Carla and a licensed therapist collectively forgot to give him good advice. idk.

The biggest problem I have with this storyline is that it fucking blows and this show was NEVER going to be able to handle it well. and showing Eddie getting through 8 episodes and 3 or 6 months without his kid and only having a handful of conversations about him and then deciding without talking to anyone that he will buy a house???? And move away?????????????? In order to try and talk to Chris again??? what the fuck happened to flying out for a few days when he’s off work?? What happened to bringing Chris back and getting him some sessions with his established therapist who he saw during the other seriously difficult moments in his life? What happened to “no Chris you can’t fly to Texas indefinitely with zero warning but you can go stay with Pepa for a week and then we can talk about you visiting your grandparents after that”

and frankly it’s out of character for Buck as well, in my personal opinion but I agree that the text of s6 did distance him a lot more from making parenting choices (though my blood pressure is gonna shoot through the roof if I think too hard about all the ways s6 did the characters dirty wrt their character arcs/growth as pertaining to parents and parenting).

anyways. I’m not actually criticizing Eddie exactly, I just think the writing for this storyline fucking blows, and regardless of the actor’s lack of availability, there were 100 better ways to tell a story about Eddie and Chris that involved Chris not being onscreen for half a season that didn’t fucking obliterate their relationship and write Eddie (and tbh the rest of the team) heinously out of character. By which I mean “incongruently with previous major character traits as expressed within the text of the show itself” and trying my best to steer clear of fanon. Tho I’m likely failing at that. But an attempt is being made.

I’m also coming from a standpoint of someone actively living through some fairly serious family trauma not wholly dissimilar to this storyline and yeah it’s got me way too heated up about it. It’s very different in a lot of important ways but my teenage brother experienced some trauma at home and didn’t get the support he needed (bc our mom didn’t have the support SHE needed in order to support him). He also doesn’t have anywhere else to go (coz his dad refuses to take him), so in that way it’s not comparable, but tbqh if my horrible abusive grandparents had offered to take him I would have argued against it!!!! Even if he wanted to!! And I’ve spoken with a half dozen mental health professionals about my situation with my brother in the last 2 years and none of them have ever suggested that completely removing him from everything familiar (including his school and friends and other family members) would in any way help the situation.

but whatever. In my opinion it’s first and foremost a failing of the writing, but from a watsonian standpoint, yes, I do not think Eddie has done enough. But also his friends have also fucking failed. Unless the answer is that he’s lied to all of them about what happened with Chris, in which case there we are again back at it being Eddie’s problem. Which really sucks for him, like I’m not unsympathetic here, but if the options are “humiliate yourself in front of your friends and therapist to get good advice and support for how to bring your child back home” or “downplay what’s going on to everyone around you and wait for your teenaged child to stop being stubborn and ask to reconcile and come home” GUESS WHAT THE RIGHT ANSWER IS.

now I would be remiss if I didn’t also mention the awful emotional saw trap Eddie is in that’s led to him making these poor decisions, bc he’s always predisposed to thinking he’s a bad parent and making the wrong choices, ESPECIALLY when faced with his own parents being in the mix, and the situation that upset Chris DID happen bc of a bad choice he made (tho again arguably seeing Kim was another narrative trap he would really have struggled to get out of any more gracefully than he did). And he already struggles with self worth issues and blaming himself for everything etc. but that’s why 8A has been such a bummer bc imho Eddie should have been a fucking wreck this whole time a la the beginning of 5B!!! He should be facing down the worst psychological torment of his adult life, and for some reason feeling so bad and gross about it that he’s refused to even tell anyone that anything is wrong or ask for help! But I’m sorry that should be pretty obvious to his friends who know him well by now!!!

ITS SUPPOSED TO BE THE ENSEMBLE FOUND FAMILY SHOW. I even used to swallow my disgust and just look away from the copaganda shit bc it was such solid chosen family storytelling!! And it just fucking isn’t, anymore, which is why this storyline sucks so bad. Whatever. The show has been leaning this gross ass direction since s6 and I got caught up in the bi buck enthusiasm but truly even if buddie went canon in the next episode I will never forgive this show or be able to actually love it again, not after this. Yes I got into the show right away bc I loved Buck from s1e1, but I fell in love with the show as soon as Chris was introduced. Eddie and Christopher’s relationship (and later on them w Buck as well) was the main reason I fell for this show. (That and the grant-nash dynamic before s5). Single parent of a disabled kid, learning to build their own chosen family??? Hey, that’s MY family story! Of course I loved seeing it on tv. But they broke it with the bullshit about forgiving the parents so the children could have grandparents in s6 and then obliterated it with 7.10. I could have forgiven them the grandparent shit if they hadn’t fucked with Christopher and Eddie.

[theotherbuckley]

Okay if Buck didn’t know about magic:

Buck takes the stairs two at a time, loudly thumping up the stairs, his frustration evident.

He just doesn’t get it. He knows that Eddie had to leave but he’d really thought FaceTime was a viable option. But Eddie’s getting settled at his new firehouse and Chris is still not talking much, and his shifts don’t align. And he gets it, Eddie would do anything for his son. Buck would have given anything to have parents who loved him half as much as that.

But then he goes to Bobby and Athena’s apartment for dinner. And it’s nice. They’re the parents he never had and he doesn’t mind admitting that now. He’d just thought they were all on the same page. Really, it’s his fault for bringing it up. Commenting on the lack of decor around the apartment, asking when they’re moving out. The pair had suddenly closed up, an awkward silence filling the room, something that never happened with them, not since the lawsuit.

“We’re um, looking at a range of options,” Bobby had said, giving Athena a look that Buck couldn’t decipher.

“What does that mean?”

“Well,” Bobby scratched the hair on his neck, looking at Buck rather sheepishly. “We’re both getting older, and the kids have moved out. We were just looking at other options.”

“Other options,” Buck repeated, a crevasse opening up inside his gut, eyebrows furring as he mouthed the words to himself. A part of him already knew what that meant but he asked anyway. “Other options like— like something smaller?” He asked, not believing the words himself,

“Other options like, maybe not LA,” Athena finished, reaching out and grabbing a hold of Bobby’s hand, their fingers interlacing.

His world stopped for a moment before he forced himself not to react. He’s better than that now. He won’t storm out. He plastered a smile on his face, said congratulations, and finished the dinner as if the pit in his stomach hadn’t opened up and swallowed him whole.

“You’re not going anywhere, right Hen?” Buck says as he reaches the loft.

Hen who’s sitting at the table, textbooks open like she’s still in medical school turns to face him, raising an eyebrow. “Hi Hen, how are you today,” she mocks gently, causing Buck to roll his eyes back.

“I just don’t get it. Everyone’s leaving! Why does everyone want to leave me!” His voice breaks slightly at the last sentence, his vulnerable self shining through. He coughs, and blinks away any tears that threaten to fall from his eyes. “It’s like I’m cursed or something,” he tries to laugh off.

It’s then that Ravi makes himself known, the younger man is sitting on the couch, book in hand. He looks up at his coworkers and says, “Maybe you are.”

Buck almost startled at his presence, unaware of anyone else being around in his frustrated state. “See, Ravi gets it,” Buck jokes but Hen doesn’t laugh.

“No, I’m serious,” Ravi says, standing from his chair and walking over to them. “Maybe you’re cursed.”

“Ravi now’s not the time—” Hen starts but Ravi interjects.

“No, no, don’t you feel it? Somethings different and I couldn’t put my finger on it before. But it makes sense. Buck’s cursed.”

AU where curses are real but known only by those who deal in magic. Buck is cursed by the ghost of Billy Boils to be alone and die alone like he did.

[lesliesknopes]

buddie alternate universe fic recs

i love making fic rec so here’s a list of some of my favourite ones (there’s a lot more but there was only so many i wanted to list).

sundae kind of love by withoutthetiger (18K)

"They’re here at the Santa Monica Pier, about an hour from home, celebrating Eddie’s graduation at the top of his class, with too much junk food and very little responsibility. It’s not quite a bribe or a payment long past due, just a deep breath before Eddie starts his new job and their lives continue to change."

An AU with lots of ice cream and a bit of a rollercoaster ride, as Buck and Eddie meet, become friends, and then have no idea how to handle any of their feelings after that.

Mr. Buckley's After Hours Detention by aresaphrodites (11K)

It’s not like Eddie Diaz planned on this. Really, there was no scenario in his mind where he would ever be bringing his son’s teacher a freaking goody basket to class; a homemade goody basket, no less. Then again, Christopher has never had a teacher quite like Evan Buckley.

of fallen leaves and falling in love by brewrosemilk (30K)

Buckley's Books is a small, charming bookstore on the outskirts of New York; when a coffee shop opens up across the street, it doesn't take long before Buck starts developing feelings for the man making his coffee.

you smiled and it was the most beautiful thing that I'd ever seen by wafflesofdoom (13K)

Eddie had always loved coffee. From the moment his parents had deemed him old enough to drink it, he’d loved coffee – he loved the smell, the taste, and most of all, he loved the process of making it. So, it was inevitable that'd he'd end up in Los Angeles, and take over Diaz's Café from his grandmother.

He just never imagined he'd meet the love of his life while doing it.

or, a 911-style ode to the classic coffee shop au trope.

sirens in the beat of your heart by trippedandfell (3K)

Buck is going to murder someone.

Okay, not actually murder, because Bobby’s got a very strict no killing on the job rule, but. Spiritually, Buck’s about to murder someone.

Swept Away (I'm Stolen) by Princessfbi (10K)

They had taken him from their home.

They had taken him— Eddie sucked in a shuddering breath at the sight of the scratches in the floor— literally kicking and screaming from their home.

Their beautiful, bright home that was now dark and empty and broken. Furniture was overturned, glass was everywhere, and the scratches on the wall were paired with scuff marks from boots.

Buck had fought them tooth and nail.

aka the James Bond AU with 007 Agent Eddie Diaz reporting for duty.

Searching Through The Pages by lullatone (21K)

At meet the teachers night, Eddie gets more than in bargained for with meeting Christopher's new school librarian.

My Salvation in You by fayevian (13K)

When Abuela calls him and says, “Eddito, I’m getting older and Pepa can’t run the tamale stand by herself. I could really use your help,” Eddie recognizes it for the lifeline it is and grabs on with both hands. It’s not hard to tell his parents he’s moving to LA. It’s hard to hear what they have to say about him, about Chris, but he packs up their stuff regardless and drives toward the Golden State with a prayer that this too won’t tarnish under his hands.

—

Eddie starts working in various farmer's markets across the county, including the Santa Monica Farmer's Market. Buck just so happens to be the market coordinator there. Something between them grows alongside the seasonal vegetables and organic wheatgrass.

on a wednesday in a cafe ( i watched it begin again ) by swiftiediaz (5K)

He writes a sweet message for the kid and signs his name at the end, even drawing a small smiley face in the corner.

"Now you have a signed book." Buck passes the book back to Eddie. Their gazes lock– intense, blue waters meeting the warm, welcoming earthy brown of Eddie's eyes and he hates to be cheesy, but Buck swears the world comes to a complete standstill.

or; Buck is an author who's been having a rough couple of months. And then he meets Eddie Diaz and his son at a café.

Take What You Need, Darling by allyasavedtheday (14K)

“Who are you?”

And Eddie intends to answer him, he really does, except-

“You must be Eddie,” the woman says, her earlier hostile tone being replaced with the utmost civility. “Maddie’s fiancé.”

Evan reels back like he’s been punched, snapping his gaze frantically between Eddie and Maddie. “Maddie’s what?”

“How rude of us,” the woman says, drifting away from Maddie’s bedside to come stand in front of him instead. “Eddie, I’m Margaret and this is my husband, Phillip. It really is so lovely to meet you.”

A Buddie While You Were Sleeping au.

(you're) simply the best by lilythesilly (3K)

“Evan,” Maddie sighs and pinches the bridge of her nose. “We’re in a tiny booth, in the quietest corner of the bar. Eddie wore a button down shirt, and there’s a present in the corner, right there.”

Buck’s eyes land on the gift bag sitting on top of Eddie’s jacket and everything comes to a sudden stop. “I —”

“Am on a date,” Maddie finishes for him.

Buck shakes his head, like that’ll shake loose all of the thoughts that have somehow frozen in his brain. “No, I. It can’t be a date. Eddie doesn’t —”

“Feel that way about you?” Maddie asks.

“Ok you really need to stop doing that.”

“Look, all I am saying,” Maddie says slowly, reaching over to grab the present and drop it down onto the table in front of him. “Is that if this gift is even remotely sentimental, you are on a date right now.”

Or, Buddie but make it Schitt's Creek.

tell me, will you stay or will you run away by prettyboybuckley (53K)

Buck is… Buck is sunshine and afternoons in the garden with Christopher.

He's knowing someone's got your back when you're surrounded by people who see you as a stuck-up royal and there might be some crazy ass terrorist trying to kill you.

Buck is quiet goodnights and tucking Christopher in, he's bickering in the backseat of the SUV.

He isn't anything that constitutes a future. OR: Somewhere along the way, Eddie falls in love with his bodyguard, and then it all goes to shit when a crazy ass terrorist does try to kill them

you come back with gravity by foxwatson (15K)

The first time that Eddie realizes with a startling clarity that he wants to kiss Buck, he’s 15 years old.

or - the one where they're childhood friends, until buck moves away, and the only thing eddie diaz has ever really wanted is buck

Write me into your happy ending... by ReallySmartLadyMarieCurie (16K)

Four years ago when Eddie and Christopher started reading the book series about Daniel's Adventures together before bedtime, Eddie never would have guessed that he would run into the author of said book series in the middle of a Barnes & Noble in LA. He also wouldn't have guessed that said encounter would begin with him sternly lecturing the stranger and making a slight fool of himself. Nor would he have predicted that this terrible first impression would somehow make the published author want to give his phone number to Eddie.

Or, Eddie the firefighter and Buck the writer have a meet-cute, and things progress from there.

you were a stranger in my phonebook I was acting like I knew by anonymous (12K)

Buck doesn’t mean to find his hot TA on Grindr and definitely doesn’t mean to message him there. But, well, the midterm study guide is incomprehensible and it’s the only thing he answers. And he definitely didn’t mean to fall for him, but, well, these things happen.

would you lie with me and just forget the world by colonoscopys (45K)

Eddie Diaz is 7, and 13, and 14, and 18, and 34.

And he loves, and he loves, and he loves, and he loves, and he loves.

Under Any Roof by three (10K)

Eddie Diaz does not need a noisy neighbor on top of all the shit he's trying to work out. But he does make really good mac and cheese.

-- “You know,” And Buck is meeting his eyes now. They’re uncannily blue. Like Kool-Aid or popsicles. “If you want, I could show you what I get up to up there?”

What? WHAT? Eddie feels heat spread from the tips of his ears to his toes. No way had he just gotten propositioned before sunrise in the decrepit hallway of their apartment building. “Um. No.” He backs up until his calves brush the door to 101. “Thank you, really. But no.”

without you by orphan_account (43K)

Buck and Eddie married young, barley out of high school and in love. the couple that everyone assumed would last forever.

emphasis on 'assumed'

or, Evan has made a new life for himself in New York, attempting to leave his old one in Texas behind. However, after almost ten years away from home, his new fiancé wants to get married, leaving Evan no choice but to return to his home state and get his stubborn husband to finally sign the divorce papers.

a buddie sweet home alabama au

Strike a Match by extasiswings (13K)

When Eddie Diaz from the 136 agrees to join one of the LAFD strike teams to provide wildfire assistance, he’s thinking about two things—overtime and hazard pay. The last thing he expects is Evan Buckley.

Take My Hand, Wreck My Plans (That's My Man) by Signsofsam (3K)

“River!”

It’s in the moment that she twists her head lazily to look at him he remembers that the cute kid with crutches and curls comes with one very attractive adult male, who is now watching him with one raised, judgmental eyebrow. Because of course--of course!--his dog has to run to the wickedly hot guy Buck has a massive crush on, with the warm brown eyes and the biceps he’s sneaked a peak at through a sleeveless shirt and the laugh that curls into Buck’s soul.

Of course.

we're not in love (but the sex is good) by elless (15K)

Eddie is new to LA. Feeling lonely, he goes to a bar for a drink and meets a beautiful stranger that kisses like a dream. What starts as a one night stand quickly moves to frequent no strings sex. When circumstances lead to them spending time together out of bed, Eddie realizes he’s attached to Buck in a way he never planned for.

Take Me Back to the Start by myemergence (54K)

Country music star, Eddie Diaz, is on a break before his US tour when he gets unexpected news: he has a son. He needs to come home to his hometown in West River, TX right away. He hasn’t set foot there since he left for Nashville nine years ago, leaving his old life behind. West River is the last place that Eddie wants to be—he needs to focus on his career, and his tour—not looking after a kid that he doesn’t even know yet.

Crossing paths with his high school sweetheart, Evan Buckley, who’s now a Deputy with the sheriff’s office just might change all of that, reminding Eddie of the person that he used to be… and the kind of person that he wants to be.

Two For One, a neighborhood romance by kimannebb (14K)

“Yeah. Uh, hi. Um. I think I have your cat.”

Eddie’s really glad he’s idling at a stop sign because he freezes. “What? Really?”

“Yeah. Collar says Bear. Does she belong to you?” The voice is amused but also understanding.

“Yes, that’s her. Thank you! Can you give me your address?” Eddie asks hurriedly. Relief washes through him knowing that she’s safe and that he won’t have to tell Chris he lost her.

“I found her curled up with my dog. I took a photo; it was the cutest thing.”

or Buck and his dog move in above Eddie and his cat. The animals instantly click and want to spend all their time together, regardless of what their owners are ready for.

walking on sunshine by fallingthorns (5K)

Buck walks out of the room, out the backdoor, and into the yard, trying to ignore his large and judgmental dog following behind him.

“I don’t want to hear it,” Buck tells him as he gets the hose out to start watering his plants. “Keep it to yourself.”

“Who are you talking to?”

Buck startles and drops the hose, doing a quick 180-degree turn and coming face-to-face with Eddie. He’s clearly standing on something, elbows folded over the top of the fence and chin resting on them as he looks at Buck. His expression looks almost fond and it kind of makes Buck want to both preen and die of embarrassment. -- Or, the one where Buck owns a doggy daycare, has a large dog with an attitude, and is hopelessly in love with his new neighbor.

the matchmakers making a match (to burn down your kitchen) by orphan_account (3K)

"Isabel smirked, that sneaky smirk he recognized meant that she had a plan, and whatever it was, it was working.

Buck had no idea what he had just signed up for."

or When Buck moves in next door to Isabel Diaz, he has no idea what he's in for when she tries to set him up with her grandson.

take me to the lakes by archerincombat (16K)

They look at each other for a moment. It feels brief, but then again it doesn’t. Buck quirks his lip up, almost teasingly. “Ready, cowboy?”

Eddie thinks he could melt. The softness makes him vaguely nauseous, like he’s sinking. “I’m from Texas,” he reminds him, “Not a western.”

or, eddie's a novelist, and buck never wanted to stay

the handyman can ('cause he fixes it with love) by iphigenias (4K)

Eddie’s first thought when he opens the door is that Hen’s finally getting payback for Eddie hustling her in pool last Friday. The guy standing on the stoop is sweaty, smiling, with biceps that look like they could jaws-of-life a car all on their own and a very pink, very biteable kiss of a birthmark above his crinkled blue eyes. His toolbelt looks like every toolbelt from every bad porn movie ever, slung absurdly low on his hips, and the acid-wash jean shorts he’s wearing absolutely cannot be OSHA-approved.

Eddie decidedly does not look at the thick muscle of the guy’s thighs when he says, “uh, I think you have the wrong house.”

[my madney fic rec list]

[evanjinx]

alternative universe buddie fics recs :)

note: the links weren't working the first time i wrote the post but i edited and they're okay now!! if it still isn't working for you is probably because you're trying to open from a reblog from before i edit it, so try open directly from the original post on my profile.

Blind Date by @sassypopstar [complete | teen and up audiences | 3.8k words]

Buck feels a little ridiculous dressed in a jacket and a shirt. But Maddie had insisted on him dressing up for the occasion and even Chimney had quipped that it’s the right thing to do. So Buck, who never went on a blind date before in his life, listened to his big sister and her boyfriend because apparently that’s who he is now. Or the one where Buck goes on a blind date with someone called Eddie.

Buckley's Bouquets by awashleyno [complete | teen and up audiences | 23.4k words]

A world where Buck owns a flower shop and manages to develop a huge, massive, ridiculous crush on a handsome firefighter that comes in for a visit one day. Or, 5 times Eddie gives flowers to other people and the 1 time he gives them to Buck.

Call It What You Will - Fate? Destiny? (A Tsunami) by @abow123456 [complete | mature | 20k words]

Evan Buckley's day of relaxation is cut short when a tsunami hits the beach he was relaxing at. He has to fight to keep himself and a lost little boy safe from the water, as well as anyone else he finds. After, he meets the boys father and family, and it causes a snowball effect of good things for him, for once.

Capuccino with extra, extra sugar by buckbng [complete | teen and up audiences | 2.7k words]

Buck is the cute barista and Eddie is the grinch that hates coffee. Until, he doesn't. Because if Buck says he looks like the kind of person that would love a cappuccino, who's Eddie to disagree with him? OR Eddie really doesn't like coffee but pretends he does just so he has an excuse to see the cute barista at the coffee shop.

Confirmation Bias by strifechaos [complete | mature | 31k words]

After the fallout with his ex-wife, Eddie believed he could only trust his family with his son. He hadn’t imagined falling for his son’s sweet-hearted nanny, Buck. With his own family so distant, Buck never considered that he’d be lucky enough to find a home for himself, let alone people he could count on. Not until he meets the Diaz boys. AU: Buck was never a firefighter, and becomes Christopher's sitter when Shannon's job takes her away from Eddie and Chris for the summer. Eddie tries to not fall for his son's nanny, he's not very successful.

dream of some epiphany by extasiswings [complete | mature | 7.3k words]

Evan Buckley is lost. It’s happenstance that he wanders into the navy recruiting center—he’s been in San Diego for a few weeks, bartending late nights and weekends, living in a house with three other guys not because he needs the roommates but because he doesn’t want to be alone, and the military is…respectable. Stable. So Buck thinks maybe and opens the door. Buck leaves ten minutes later with a set of printed instructions for sending his first letter, assured that he can drop it off whenever he’s ready, and a name. Staff Sergeant Edmundo “Eddie” Diaz.

Frequent Flyer by red_to_black [complete | mature | 13.4k words]

In his entire time being a firefighter, Eddie has never met anyone as accident-prone as Evan Buckley. And Buck - well, he's quickly becoming the 118's best customer. (Or - the one where Eddie is a firefighter, Buck isn't, and Eddie finds himself rescuing Buck from increasingly sticky situations. Sometimes literally.)

Gave me no messages, gave me no signs... by @reallysmartladymariecurie [complete | teen and up audiences | 7.4k words]

"Buck is beyond nervous, and he’s really trying to convince himself that the familiarity of the situation is not some sort of bad omen. Just because there are parallels of the start of his relationship with Eddie to that of his relationship with Abby doesn’t mean that this new adventure is destined to end in the same miserable fashion. He hopes it won’t, has to believe it won’t. Because even with Abby, he hadn’t fallen this hard for her before their first official date. With Eddie, everything is already intensified by a thousand." Or, Buck covers a shift for a firefighter at the 136 and it leads to a budding relationship through text messages.

Gotta Find My Corner (Of the Sky) by doctornineandthreequarters [complete | general audiences | 31.3k words]

It was the last day of 2016 and two lost souls found themselves in a quiet dive bar, as the loud noises of the city celebrating New Year’s Eve buzzed around them. Most people chose loud, flashy bars with DJs and entrance fees and promises of champagne for New Year’s Eve. But both occupants of the dive bar preferred the quiet. They both didn’t need the added chaos when everything around them already felt chaotic. --- Or, Buck and Eddie meet on New Year's Eve, 2016, a meeting that sets of a series of events that changes the trajectory of both of their lives.

I Didn't Know I Was Lonely 'Till I Saw Your Face by @hmslusitania [complete | general audiences | 10.4k words]

After the ladder truck and the blood clot and the tsunami, Bobby makes Buck go to therapy before he does something stupid (like sue the city). Buck's not totally comfortable being alone with a therapist, but fortunately he makes a friend and ally who's willing to help him out - Eddie Diaz from the 136 who's just been caught in an illegal fight club. OR Total strangers Buck and Eddie go to couple's therapy together to get out of the therapy requirements their captains have placed on them.

i want your midnights by allyasavedtheday [complete | teen and up audiences | 36.3k words]

In which Eddie decides to rent out his spare room to help with mortgage repayments right around the time Buck decides to move out of Abby's place after some not so gentle prodding from Maddie. It's a coincidence. Or serendipity. Or maybe just really good timing.

i wanna be know (by you) by @starlightbuck [complete | general audiences | 12.5k words]

“I didn’t mean to do it.” Hen glances down at Eddie’s phone then back up at him in disbelief.

“How do you ‘not mean’ to download a bunch of dating apps but still have them on your phone?”

Or  In which Eddie delves into the intimidating world of online dating.

if i got locked away (would you still love me the same?) by @firefighterhan [complete | general audiences | 3.7k words]

Buck gets accidentally thrown in jail after meddling in a fight outside of a grocery store. There, he meets an unexpected guest, famous music artist Eddie Diaz, who is being suspiciously quiet about how he ended up here in the first place.

if only in my dreams by @buttercupbuck [complete | general audiences | 5.4k words]

Years before Eddie joins the 118, Buck meets him at an airport bar on Christmas day.

in a week by @buttercupbuck [complete | explicit | 78.9k]

in which Eddie joins the U.S. Forest Service and in the meadows of California, finds the things he thought he lost and the things he thought he'd never have.

It Started With A Bang And A Hostage Situation by JayJay__884 [complete | general audiences | 6.6k words]

Buck goes to the store one late night to buy food because of Maddie's pregnancy cravings. Whilst at the store, Buck accidentally gets caught in the middle of a robbery and gets knocked out. After waking up in the backroom, Buck finds himself as a hostage with a handsome and caring stranger.

Leading with the Left by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels [complete | explicit | 84.7k]

When Buck said he was a "bartender" in "South America" what he actually meant was "stripper" in "Mexico." And when Eddie said, "What's your problem?" what he actually meant was, "Is this about the time you gave me a lap dance?" In other words, there's a few things the 118 doesn't know about Buck. Or Eddie. Or Buck and Eddie's relationship.

Lift me up by @captain--sif [complete | teen and up audiences | 5.5k words]

Buck gets stuck in his apartment building's broken elevator with his good-looking neighbor from the sixth floor.

Love and Bullets Both Shatter Hearts (But Only One Can Put You Back Together) by @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels [complete | explicit | 11.2k words]

Agent [Redacted] Diaz is the best at what he does. Usually. But lately there's this real pain in the ass* who's been ruining his missions: Code Name "Buck."

*stupidly handsome and annoyingly talented rival spy

Mr. Buckley's After Hours Detention by aresaphrodites [complete | mature | 11.4k words]

It’s not like Eddie Diaz planned on this. Really, there was no scenario in his mind where he would ever be bringing his son’s teacher a freaking goody basket to class; a homemade goody basket, no less. Then again, Christopher has never had a teacher quite like Evan Buckley.

MukbangsWithBuck by @reallysmartladymariecurie [complete | teen and up audiences | 19.3k words]

After growing tired of eating alone in his loft, Buck decides to start a YouTube channel where he records himself eating dinner and telling stories about crazy things his team has encountered on calls. He eventually gains a substantial fanbase, and he is led to the channel of another LA firefighter who uploads informational videos and also casual vlogs with his ten-year-old son. It isn't long before the two start a friendship through messages, both of them secretly hoping it will turn into something more. Or, Eddie and Buck are both firefighters/YouTubers and they end up falling in love.

Objects in the Mirror by SevenSoulmates [complete | explicit | 139.1k words]

The voice had always been around, Eddie remembers it, like a stream of consciousness that babbled incoherently to the point where Eddie just tuned it out.  But then the voice started speaking directly to him. Conversing like he was a whole person standing right in front of him. Like he could see what was happening around Eddie. Eddie shook his head. No one was talking to him, and Eddie most certainly was not talking back. He wouldn’t talk to the boy in his head ever again. There was no boy in his head. 

Passive Aggressive Flirting by @starlingbite [complete | general audiences | 4.5k words]

Buck and Eddie have never met. They both work at the 118 but just on different shifts. That's all about to change when Buck finds a sticky note message, signed E.

String of hearts... by @reallysmartladymariecurie [complete | teen and up audiences | 11.1k words]

“Now. Eddie is this incredible presence. He’s funny and smoking hot, and he has a son who sounds wonderful. And he’s serious and vulnerable at times. But so enjoyable to be around, every single second that he’s there. And how can I put myself out there when the expectation is so high? When the thing I might lose is so beautiful?”

In which Buck owns a plant shop in LA, and Eddie becomes his new favorite customer. Pining ensues.

check out my post of buddie fics with dad!buck