#mostly because it can be about so many different things

[scartale-an-undertale-au]

So... I see this a decade after i decided to simply... Stop instigating conversations because i felt like im simply burdening others with my presence and that they actually felt annoyed having to hear from me and wished i wouldnt send messages.

The thing is that none of them ever approached me afterwards. When we saw each other after a while we would be ecstatic but there was a wall between us already and i dont know if its simply life going on and us being very different than back then, or that they truly didnt see me the same as i saw them (as my besties).

One time i met one of them (this one specifically was my best friend from first grade until twelve basically) on the street and i see that she's married and walking with her husband. Turns out the wedding was that sunday and i wasnt even notified of it happening or of the engagement. I wasnt mad about not being invited, but i was hurt for not even being notified! She then turned to her husband and said that im a friend of her from high school.

Its been a decade from high school so i can see why she said that, but that hurt me so badly that the moment i waved them goodbye and they disappeared around a corner, i collapsed and just sobbed. I was so heartbroken. It seemed that i was the only one who still thought of her as my old school's bestie or had thought of including her in any future milestones simply because she was so important to me.

So i dont know how i feel about this post. I understand where you guys are coming from and its in good intentions, but the main issue is that many kids who become the sole instigators were never shown that they can be vulnerable in front of their friends about this matter. It felt like its your duty and how you contribute to the group. And when it became harder and harder, the friends never questioned why you pulled away or asked for your wellbeing. It turned into a situation when you feel more like a nuisance than a leader.

Fortunately, i have now friends who instigate so much more than me and i keep telling them how i appreciate it and apologise for how terrible i am at texting back and that its never because i dont want them to text me. Its simply because texting or answering messages had become so hard for me and so mentally taxing i sometimes shut down when i see messages i need to reply to.

So rambling aside, as much as i appreciate your sentiment, i think a different approach would be helpful.

My approach (which is not better or worse, just a different approach) is to get comfortable with a 'friends for one day' reality. I go so many times to so many places and meet so many amazing people, we always say we'll contact one another and keep in touch and then never contact one another again, and that's alright.

You have to be comfortable with being friends without focusing on the 'keeping the friendship going' let people come and go. Those who truly want to stick around will stick around, and they usually have a much deeper connection with you that isnt dependant on who instigates the conversations.

My friends are those that mostly text in memes and reels since we dont see each other often. And i do the same in return. Its easier and relays so much more. We have proper conversations here and there, but our actual interactions happen physically. And they instigate meetups much more than i do and i always make sure that they know that i appreciate it. One of my friends and i also have some differences in opinions, so we have some long discussions.

I also have a friend who i dont text to at all but invites me to shabbat meals once in a while and i come over and its like no time had passed. I invite her back for bbq or shabbat as well, but thats also once in a blue moon.

Another friend is across the ocean so its mostly photos and small comments and talks about our lives and since the war began, she keeps checking if im alive and well.

Another friend is also across the ocean and we mostly speak about our realities of being jews or squeal over her precious daughter or make plans for when she finally comes to Israel.

So my friends arent part of one group but many branches of different aspects of my life. I would say i have around seven/eight of them that arent my current co workers (work friendship is also temporary and i accept that fully and enjoy our time together) and im truly blessed because i had let go of the desperate need to keep my friends together.

So please dont call us a bitch for not willing to talk about it. And we're certainly not mini community leaders, we're just people who are friends with those that never cared about reaching out first or affirming our friendship in any kind of way. Its not fair to put the expectations of reaching out onto the one who constantly did that. Friends who truly want to keep up a friendship will attempt to do so when they see that the other side isnt as present as previously.

Sorry im all over the place, im on my phone and its harder to articulate on it

every now and then the internet decides it should revamp the ole “stop texting first and see how many friends you lose” when in reality you could literally just communicate that u feel bad that ur the only one texting first

[unpretty]

If, hypothetically, someone was a 26 year old virgin who’s never been kissed at what point should they tell a new partner that if they wanted to avoid looking incredibly lame but also wanted to explain why they’re incredibly awkward

you shouldn't ask me for advice because i'll based it on my own life experience and say "that's none of their business" which is probably not what you're looking for

you don't have to, like. warn people that you might be bad at it because of inexperience. you can just let them think you're bad at it normally. i have done a lot of kissing and sex and i still don't feel like i know what i'm doing. you can have good and bad sex at every experience level. you can be a guy in a long term committed relationship who thinks listening to cbat during sex is a good idea.

in high school i made out with some people who did a weird thing with their teeth that i KNEW they learned from fanfic, and then i got older and made out with grown-ass adults that i knew got laid who still did the teeth thing, so either it's a Real Move and that's why it's in fanfic or else no one ever asked them what the fuck they were doing. i'm not into it. ask before you get your teeth in there. every new partner is starting over from scratch anyway, you're going to have to ask for their likes and dislikes regardless. or just bite their whole fucking mouth with confidence and see how that goes.

if you want to let them know because you want it to be Special i guess that's a thing you can do, but mostly i think that would be putting a lot of pressure on both of you for no reason. you can let them know you like to take things slow and prefer for them to take the lead, but i don't see why you'd need anything more than that.

there's so many different ways to fuck, if it's penetration you feel awkward about you can always just say, "hey, i've had trouble in the past getting penetration to work for me so i'm going to need some help here." the trouble could be performance anxiety, could be weird anatomical incompatibilities, or it could be that you didn't have a partner. they don't need to know the details. if you've had many loving committed relationships where you've done nothing but frot, that's still sex and also no one's business. if they insist on details about your sexual history, they're the weird one and you're allowed to nope out.

[mymoshangthoughts]

something i think about with regards to og!shang qinghua

i totally think he smashed mobei jun's face in with the rock

like okay the scene plays out basically the same, except instead of thigh-hugging, the original goods was groveling and hiding and dodging and only BARELY managed to survive for long enough for mobei jun to faint

so here he is, surrounded by corpses and a fainted demon and theres this big ass rock over there and he's like "yeah, thats the pragmatic thing to do"

but see, airplane and the original goods both vastly over-estimated the ability of a rock to kill a demon lord. so yeah, mobei jun has a nasty broken nose and he wakes up feeling like death warmed over in the middle of the woods but he's alive (this is btw the exact reason that the system was willing to let airplane do it, bc it wasnt gonna kill mobei jun anyway and it was what the og goods did)

and he was JUST conscious enough to see the original goods bash his face in

so mobei jun is sitting there like "okay, yeah, so imma find that fucker and imma enslave him and then when he runs out of use to me, imma kill his ass" because he's angry enough right now that simply killing og!shang qinghua just does Not feel good enough

and their relationship over the years is basically a big game of cat and mouse with them trying to fuck each other over. mostly the original goods trying to kill mobei jun and mobei jun just like "no imma wait to kill him until AFTER ive had a thorough revenge but fuck he makes it tempting to kill him right now" and og!shang qinghua highkey actually reminds him of his uncle. they're both the two-faced type who can smile to your face and stab you in the back and he's sorta thinking "if i cant resist killing one stupid human until the opportune time, how am i going to not kill my uncle??"

and basically it's just like..... lowkey shizaya (drrr!) vibes between them? and look, mobei jun is Very satisfied when he finally kills that worm og!shang qinghua but he also feels a certain loss because even though theres srsly no love lost between them, the original goods was basically mobei jun's companion for longer than anyone else in his life (enemy? frenemy? rival????) and it's just a sort of weird empty feeling after he's dead

and i just like thinking about how Different their relationship was because i like thinking about all of the changes that airplane accidentally created because he really didnt know that much about their original relationship. og!shang qinghua was such a footnote in the novel that there really wasnt any time spent on "oh yeah, og!moshang has a super weird hateship and shang qinghua did backstab mobei jun but that wasnt actually NEW, og!shang qinghua tried to kill off the king of the north at least once a month or so"

anyway i think the distinctions in the relationships are important for moshang reasons, because airplane and og!shang qinghua ARE different people, so they had to have made different decisions over the years, and those differences are why mobei jun was very much in love with airplane and not in love with og!shang qinghua

(altho i do enjoy og!moshang, but i will die on the hill that their relationship is different and whatever love might exist between them would be different. my hcs might not represent accurately how og!moshang's relationship was canonically but i just think it's important to make those distinctions)

but all these thoughts lend themselves to "what if pidw!mobei jun met airplane!shang qinghua?" because look, if they really were collaborating for so many years, he would KNOW og!shang qinghua. and as such, it wouldnt take him long to be like "okay but you're seriously NOT shang qinghua tho?!?!" and i love his confusion. like i dont think he'd show up and be like "guh, shang qinghua, gotta kill that rat again", i think he'd show up and be like "......well thats definitely shang qinghua's skin but that sure as fuck isnt shang qinghua"

and look, i want the chaos of that.

pidw!mobei jun and svsss!mobei jun discussing why the fuck shang qinghua is a completely different person and coming to their own conclusions (also naturally realizing a thing or two about cucumber-bro bc thats the other big notable change between worlds. bing-mei is fine, pidw!mobei jun always know that bing-ge is secretly pathetic)

also potential for kidnapping? like pidw!mobei jun nabs airplane with the intention of learning just who the fuck he is. leaving absolutely no room for discussion bc he's determined to figure this shit out. or maybe he just approaches his other self directly. or fuck it, if he goes straight to bing-mei because he's like "okay this is above my pay grade, boss of this dimension will prolly have an idea of whats happening"

also double penetration with two mobei jun's and one airplane lmfao. look im a simple man with simple pleasures

altho on the note of og!shang qinghua, thinking about this diabolical fuck does have my inner villain fucker thoroughly entertained and i wanna think about au's with both airplane and og!shang qinghua in play

there's always the good ol' sibling au's (which will always make me scream to the fucking sky "why the fuck wasnt airplane given a NAME so that i dont have to make one up for him!!!"), those definitely have the appeal of i can keep airplane!shang qinghua's design the same

so lets go with.... shang jingqi (original flavor) and shang feiyu (airplane), for simplicities sake while i explore stupid au ideas lol

so lesseee shang feiyu is born as shang jingqi's twin but since qinghua is a courtesy name and he doesnt actually know og!shang qinghua's birth name, he just knows that ONE of them is supposed to become "shang qinghua" and get killed by mobei jun. and look, he tries really hard not to get attached to his twin. he's used to keeping emotional distance from family, this should be fine, easy even. his twin even has a sort of asshole personality. so if he just doesnt get attached to shang jingqi and just lets the og plot eat up his twin, everything will be just fine and he can live a peaceful life, right? RIGHT???

but ofc he gets attached. bc even tho shang jingqi has a shitty personality and might actually be the original shang qinghua who backstabbed mobei jun and deserved what he got--look, thats HIS treacherous asshole and shang feiyu is ATTACHED okay

so shang jingqi and shang feiyu BOTH wind up joining cang qiong because shang feiyu isn't gonna just leave his twin to die but also he doesnt wanna die so he's really trying to figure out a third option to figure out how the fuck to dodge this all shang-murderfest thing when one day his brother comes home from a mission like "so i might have murdered a demon lord with a rock??" and shang feiyu is going to FREAK OUT bc either that was mobei jun and he is Not Dead and Coming For Their Asses or it WASNT mobei jun and its someone who would make mobei jun Very Angry if was harmed and shang feiyu is ready to hug as many thighs as he needs to so that they can get out of this alive!!! but shang jingqi already has a bit of a murder-boner for mobei jun, even moreso when he realizes theres like Chemistry between mobei jun and his brother and just Nope. that aint happening.

shang feiyu: i am trying to keep you alive wiLL YOU PLZ STOP TRYING TO PISS OFF THE DEMON LORD?!

shang jingqi: and IM trying to protect your ass from demon cock, thank me later

shang feiyu: ?!?!?! WHAT DOES THAT WHAT

[linddzz]

While yes, Viktor is confident too, but...

This man isn't shy? He's hyperventilating and nervous-tapping over the idea of giving a speech!

This man?

I guess Im not getting across like, the Vibe that I always see that bothers me? Viktor's got the social anxiety for sure, and it's VERY fair to assume that his condition makes him even more self conscious to be up in front of a crowd full of topsiders. He's pretty clear in episode 1 that he's aware of how topsiders see him and his cane use, and that's before his disability is even more visible.

But ALSO very few people ARE good on a stage in front of tons of people. And also there's a very specific connotation to "shy" that is beyond social anxiety.

Shyness to me, is its own flavor of social anxiety plus timidness. The actual definition is a bashful, timid nervousness. It has connotations of the wilting flower personality. Viktor, even when he's quiet around other people doesn't come across as nervous or timid in the slightest. His first introduction has him VERY confident and collected surrounded by enforcers and not taking Jayce being snappy and angry at him. As a kid there's more of an argument to be made because what awkward socially isolated kid isn't going to be shy. But at the same time he doesn't try to shrink away from Sky's attention, he still looks right back up at her, he just keeps on doing his own thing. Mostly he comes across as someone who does not know how to casually interact with people so he doesn't. He's got tunnels in his eyes lmao.

Viktor is complicated. Viktor is nuanced. It's why he's Ultimate Blorbo. He's withdrawn and awkward and not very good at interacting with people, but he's not timid about it. He is very self assured in himself.

But when I say fandom makes him shy it IS much more of the wilting flower timid woobie that I kept seeing in Season1 fics. There was SO MUCH of Viktor being the nervous soft spoken anxious thing who was just so happy Jayce was even giving him the time of day as if Viktor didn't sass Jayce about his notes right after he stopped the man from jumping lmaoooo

And idk not to be TOO OBVIOUS with my projecting but it's the part of Viktor I can relate to the most. I consider myself a quiet person who gets annoyed when people think that me being quiet = shy. I'm able to speak up well on zoom calls with colleagues and I also would rather drop dead than have to go up on a stage in front of a bunch of normal people who I know were expecting someone very different. I get nervous and shaky speaking up in front of a crowd of colleagues even! but afterwards I can go right up to people like "your presentation was insane tell me more right now." I am often quiet and uncomfortable in large social situations because I know that most people there are operating under a different wavelength than I am, I do not know what the right responses to things are, or I full on do not know how to not accidentally come across as a huge asshole and I don't want to be an asshole. And when I was younger I would have so many people come up and act like I was a little wallflower (bc oh boy can I also relate to being quiet while physically small meaning being constantly infantalized) who "didn't need to be so shy" and every time I was like "I'm not shy. I just don't feel any engagement with this conversation and I don't want to be a dick and tell you that, but if you gently tell me it's ok to talk one more time I'm gonna start biting."

(It got better as I got older bc I learned that if you're quiet but making active eye contact instead of staring off into other directions - not to avoid attention but because you're just thinking of other shit - people will stop labeling you as shy and instead say "intimidating" or "mysterious" which is also hilarious when what you're thinking about is "machine herald big naturals lmao" but it's better than being labeled "shy")

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Hello! I was wondering if you had any advice/sources on how to write relationships between siblings where one has ASPD (specifically sociopathic-inclined)?

Writing Notes: ASPD Relationships

Antisocial personality disorder - a pattern of disregard for, and violation of, the rights of others, criminality, impulsivity, and a failure to learn from experience.

In order to be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder, an individual must show a continuing pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others, occurring since age 15, with three (or more) of the following:

Failure to conform to laws and social norms (repeatedly breaking laws).

Deceitfulness (repeated lying or conning others for personal profit or pleasure).

Impulsivity or failure to plan ahead.

Irritability and aggressiveness (repeated physical fights or assaults).

Reckless disregard for safety of self or others.

Consistent irresponsibility (repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations).

Lack of remorse (being indifferent to having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another).

In addition, the individual must be at least age 18 years and there must be evidence of conduct disorder before age 15.

Sources: 1 2 3 4 5 6

Hi! Here are some signs and symptoms of ASPD you can use to guide you in writing scenes involving sibling relationships of your character with ASPD. Make them more specific to fit your story, so for example (#4), write about repeated fights with their sibling.

Here are more notes, mostly focusing on interpersonal relationships, from different sources that can guide your writing to show your character's relationship with their sibling (sources linked above). Choose which ones are most appropriate, and alter as needed for your story:

A person with antisocial personality disorder may...

exploit, manipulate or violate the rights of others

lack concern, regret or remorse about other people's distress

behave irresponsibly and show disregard for normal social behaviour

have difficulty sustaining long-term relationships

be unable to control their anger

lack guilt, or not learn from their mistakes

blame others for problems in their lives

repeatedly break the law or take part in criminal activity, but if they do, they are not sorry for their hurtful deeds

be inconsiderate of the rights of others

be deceitful and intimidating in relationships

not value "playing by the rules." They do so only if they are threatened with punishment. This attitude leads to a tendency to exploit others. They take advantage of the fairness or softheartedness of others, and they feel indifferent toward or even contemptuous of their victims.

have little, if any, ability to be intimate with another person. Any lasting relationships are likely to involve some degree of abuse or neglect.

sometimes be charming and can be good actors who use lies and distortion to keep relationships going. Some with antisocial personality disorder have no goal beyond the pleasure of deceiving or harming others.

appear to care for no one but themselves. They may be able to understand the emotions of others. But they don't suffer any shame or guilt about the pain they may be causing. Instead, they use their knowledge of others' weaknesses to gain favors or to manipulate an outcome.

not take responsibility for any of his or her own suffering. He or she may blame others when things go badly. Many with this disorder do suffer, because they can be self-defeating, and never get to enjoy the many pleasures that come to people who are better able to have mutual and satisfying relationships.

[thebroccolination]

STOLAS AND BLITZ'S CURRENT RELATIONSHIP IS A TREASURE TROVE

Helluva Boss is the ideal source material for fanworks in so many ways. Especially because of where Blitz and Stolas's relationship is right now.

One of the show's more obvious issues is the pacing, and while I don't know a ton about animated productions, it's always seemed to me like they're creating an enormously ambitious production on a pretty limited budget, so they kind of have to power through these episodes at a hundred miles an hour without the luxury of going at the slower, more nuanced pace they deserve. But that's where fanfiction and fanart can really elevate what canon gives us, because the show is creating so much potential to explore, and we have time in between episodes to play!

Basically: I love it here and this episode was a buffet of goodness.

Following Mastermind, Stolas and Blitz are discovering that despite their physically intimate relationship and their feelings for each other, they don't actually know each other.

In Sinsmas, we see Stolas and Blitz discovering so many new things about each other, to the point where you wonder what they ever talked about until you remember: sex. When they reunited as adults, they never re-learned who each other is now. Instead, they jumped past personal intimacy to physical intimacy.

And now that they're working on their personal intimacy, I love that Blitz has flipped completely from acting cold to Stolas out of uncertainty and self-defense to committing to him, unrelentingly loyal and affectionate. The way he is with Loona.

So we have them learning each other in doses:

• Blitz's horse thing

• Stolas's secret medication

• What Stolas eats

• Social norms Stolas didn't have to know when he was part of the wealthy ruling class

• Hellborn culture

• Blitz's genuine love for the company he built, not just pride

• Just how different Blitz's way of life is from the one Stolas is accustomed to

• And the real Blitz as opposed to the idealized version Stolas invented in his fantasies

In Mastermind, Stolas has that line, "Why am I throwing my freedom away for this idiot?" in part because he was still mad at Blitz, but also because Blitz has been knocked off his pedestal, and Stolas has to relearn him from nothing.

But the thing is: this idiot loves Stolas.

He's not ashamed to eat with Stolas in public, not ashamed to protect him from the other Hellborn who hate Stolas because of the trial.

He's genuinely delighted spending his time with Stolas.

He'll hunt rats in an alley just to make sure Stolas is eating what he likes.

And he champions Stolas's very first secretarial attempt in very characteristically giddy flavor.

He risks his life to save Stolas's, a flip from Mastermind.

He wraps Stolas in his own jacket to keep him warm, even though Blitz just complained about Earth's winter topside.

And he wraps Stolas in a blanket, then eats hot coals/brimstone(/whatever those rocks were) to become a hot water bottle for Stolas.

Because ultimately, what Blitz wants and perhaps realizes he wants in this episode is that he wants to be a complete family with Stolas and their daughters.

And they'll get there in part by talking to each other about what matters.

Not fighting, not yelling, not walking away, just talking to each other. About their vulnerabilities and their fears and what hurts. About their past hurts and their worries for the future.

And they've never done that at length before.

The trial gave Blitz the wakeup call he needed, and now the season is ending with Blitz completing another curve of his character arc. Does he believe he deserves Stolas? No. Does he have the family he wants? Nope! But to get there he has to make things right with Stolas, and he's (mostly) done that.

What comes next for them in season three will be up to Stolas.

Blitz has embraced Stolas, but it's not quite reciprocal yet.

So I look forward to aaaaaaalllllllllI the fic and fanart along the way. :>

[justsumtransdude2000]

Because you asked so nicely;

When we talk about twinkification we first have to establish what 'twink' as a concept is, and while I don't like playing semantics I do think the way we define this word is extremely important, mostly because twink, in the modern era has become one of two things. On one hand, it has become a term to use about any feminine man, sometimes even regardless of sexuality or even gender presentation. On the other, it has become another way for straight white women to call gay men slurs without actually saying said slurs. I don't think I should have to explain to you why both of these definitions are incorrect, harmful, and water down the way we see twink. Twink, according to Wikipedia (and before I hear any bullshit about it being wiki, if you will oh so kindly look at the long source list, there are many credible and also queer sources for the article) refers to a skinny, often young, hairless gay man. This definition has evolved from its (highly debated) original one of either 'twank' (a gay, male prostitute who is also a bottom) or twinkie, as a reference to the food because twinkies (I shit you not this is what the article says) lack nutritional value, sweet to the taste and creme filled. Now, the article says that twink is merely a physical marker. I, as a gender non conforming trans man who considers himself othered from the community of gay men (for reasons of both transness and bisexuality), cannot speak on this, or how the word is currently used in gay culture. I can, however, as a chronically online piece of shit, speak on how the word has developed in fandom culture, and how the twinkification of a character is not just physical, but also a stripping of said characters main attributes. But, to summarize, the word twink refers to an effeminate gay man who is (traditionally) young and a bottom. He is skinny, tall and sassy. Twink, in the real world is used only as a physical marker, but in fandom space is almost completely different to its real world usage.

Now that the semantics are out of the way we can get to the meat and potatoes of this essay. Twinkification, as a process applied it fictional characters, is bad because it strips them of their core identity traits to make room for sass, their skinniness (which is turned into a personality trait, or, at the very least a main characteristic) and their bottomness (please see the previous set of parenthesis). As to be as precise as possible with how this can/does happen I will use characters from a fandom I am familiar with as an example; Regulus and Sirius Black, as characterized by the Marauders Fandom (which is, in fact leagues different from the Harry Potter Fandom). However, to be as precise as I personally want to be, I also have to explain the significance of both of their characters, and how them being changed fundamentally is not that out of place because of the fandom, so that I can (eventually) prove that the way they are often characterized not only does not resonate the sentiments of the fandom, but actively works against it.

Firstly, the Marauders Fandom does not abide by canon, unlike other fandoms that may work in a very dissimilar way. This fandom operates on the basis that, because the canon is written by a TERF who gets physically enraged when in proximity to a trans person, taking her original characters and making them as queer as possible actively works against her, and is therefore not only a way of protest, but also a way to enjoy some peoples favorite media, guilt free. (There are multiple different sides to this arguement, and while I have my opinions on what constitutes protest and how guilt free one can actually be while not actively doing something for the communities JKR often hurts, that is not what this essay is about). This is the viewpoint all the characters, and therefore my argument, hinges on. To truly understand the twinkification process we need to first examine how these characters are treated in canon versus in the fanon universe. Sirius, for example, is canonically very unefeminate. While he is sassy, often throwing quips and firing back at people when he has the chance, he is not sassy in the same way that twinks are. In fact, I would argue Remus is much more effeminate and twink adjacent, but I'll put a pin in that for now. Going back to Sirius, though, he is almost the antithesis of a twink when it comes to a real world perception of the concept. He has wild, long hair in his first appearance, and while he is also skinny that is because he is malnourished, not because it is his natural state. He also has thick facial hair that he keeps throughout his appearances in the movies and (if I'm not mistaken) the books. He is hairy, vulgar at times, sarcastic, and doesn't do anything I (personally) would deem as 'bottom behavior.' His fanon appearances are, however, quite different.

Throughout fanon Sirius is often depicted, physically, in the same way he is when he is severely malnourished and on the run from soul sucking demons, which is to say, the fanon is not based on him when he is at his best both mentally and physically. He is often written or drawn to have gaunt cheeks and skinny, bordering on malnourished, features. His hair is long, but kept very proper, his nails are trimmed short (sometimes) and often colored, he is very often depicted as a bottom in the very popular fanon ship between him and Remus Lupin, and dresses extremely differently depending on the depiction. It is here, however, I do have to admit I do not have a strong case for his twinkification, because of the fact that he is often written to be genderfluid or nonbinary, and its a very common headcanon to hold. That being said, he is still often robbed of his personality to be the traumatized, rich, twink who is alll the way down bad for one Remus Lupin. Even in his own fics he is often characterized as lazy, dumb, and only carrying the following personality traits; sarcastic, traumatized, skinny, and slutty waist (I am truly tired of hearing this phrase! I mean it! Stop sexualizing every part of a goddamn body you hornballs). This is all to say that; twinkification is not only about the body but also about the soul.

Moving on, however, to my much stronger evidence; Regulus Arcturus Black. Regulus has 0 canon appearances, on account of being dead, and has a few cameos of which only his memory is present. The only things we know are; he was a death eater because he was (as described by Sirius Black, his brother,) 'too soft' not to fall into the ideology his parents had picked out for him, he was a Slytherin, he was on the quidditch team and likely a seeker. There is a singular picture in the film adaptation that makes him appear, in my opinion, quite well built. However, when adapted into fandom many things are changed about him. He and his brother are implied to having been abused by their parents, causing Sirius to move out in the summer between 6th and 7th year (I could be wrong on this as the canon and fanon timelines have become muddled), something that canonically is often translated into physical abuse. Because of this Regulus is betrayed as the lesser willed sibling. While Sirius definetly has a fight response the the abuse in fanon, Regulus has a freeze or (more accurately) fawn reaction, which unfortunately leads people to portray him as weak (there is a lot to say about that and how this fandom in general views abuse victims, and as someone who is an abuse victim myself some of you guys really could benefit from, I dunno, logging off a while). He is often also portrayed as sarcastic, depressed and skinny which I must emphasize is more often than not a personality trait and not a descriptor. Because we don't know much about his canon personality there is no telling if this directly contradicts his canon self, but we do know that he was, for lack of better term, kinda evil. He was a death eater and only really stopped being one because Voldemort hurt his closest friend, a house elf named Kreature. Why do people do this though? The same reason people do anything in fandom - for the sake of a ship. A very popular fanon ship is Jegulus the ship between Regulus Black and James Potter. James in this instance is a jock, one of Sirius' friends and a (for lack of better term) Good Guy, TM. People like this dynamic because, you guessed it, poor gay sadboi gets rescued by Good Guy TM and the abusers die, or whatever, Regulus is stripped of his autonomy in his own choices because it's no fun if he actually chose anything because that would make him flawed and while fandom praises morally grey people they actually hate staring into the abyss and seeing anything relatively human staring back at them because then they are reminded that their black and white thinking will not help them brave the winter that is going outside and interacting with people. Moreover, Regulus is often stripped of an identity outside of Jegulus, his personhood being removed along with his autonomy so that he can be forever codependent on James, until death do them part. He is also often described as pretty in an almost feminine way, white, short and gay, with high cheekbones and gaunt cheeks and - fuck how many other ways can I say he's skinny? To get to my point, Regulus is twinkified by his autonomy and personhood being stripped away from him systemically to make room for fandom's favorite OTP. By taking away the bad things he's done, and then labeling him morally grey because he is mean but in a way that reminds people of their own high school bullies, we are stripping him of the things that make him him, and cutting him down to a borderline homophobic caricature of an 'evil twink.'

Finally, why do I think this happens? A lot of reasons. The shift in public perception from gay people being evil baby eating crossdressers to them being okay in most parts if America and Canada has also shifted how covertly homophobic people are allowed socially to talk about us. Because of this they have had to find sneakier ways to call us slurs, and have settled (or had settled, for a while) on twink. But, because straight people primarily control culture and therefore perception of us, the general reaction from gay and queer people was important. Hence the normalization of calling any gay man with a pulse a twink. But I think that has little to do with fandom and more to do with the general okay attitude towards it.

I also think it happens because of people's general want for that morally grey, but not in a too bad way, characters. They want that golden spot of getting someone who is mean and does kind of bad things like stealing and smoking cigarettes and calling them fags, but not someone whose actions they actually have to reckon with and actively try not to normalize. Basically it is really hard to defend racism, even if it's in a fictional setting.

Furthermore, I want to talk about peoples need for a sanitized type of queerness. A gay man who is feminine, but won't put on a dress because crossdressing is still generally weird and too gay right now and just not in. Someone who is sassy but not female because then it isn't gay. Someone who only breaks gender norms a little, because if they actually broke out of the box that is gender a lot of people would not be able to tuck themselves in at night knowing that characters in a fictionally setting are defying norms in a universe they are not a part of. Because, at the end of the day, it's cool to have 'deconstructed gender' until you have to confront how it has benefitted you, so to get around it? Strip characters that you want to be gay but not too gay into a caricature that you can see in any late 90's early aughts romcom/sitcom.

I am sorry that this took so long and also sorry for writing it. I am a yapper, and you asked, so really it's your fault (damn am I Regulus because the writer is stripping me from accountability with my own choices)

People who twinkify Regulus/Sirius and make James/Remus (respectively) big and strong haven't unpacked heteronormativity and still believe - maybe even subconsciously - that every relationship has a 'man' and a woman.' In this essay I will-

[hannahbarberra162]

Who do you think is meaner in bed, Marco or Izo? I think lots of people would (ignorantly) assume he'd be a sub because he's feminine only to get a shock when he flips things on them, but while I think he's a good dom I personally don't see him as being a particularly mean one. I think he'd be good at staying calm and collected and making you feel reeaally embarrassed about how easily you lose composure by comparison. Marco has so much responsibility and steam to blow off I can see it. Division commander, head doctor, has to bully the strongest man in the world into taking his meds, he's gotta take the stress out on someone. Heehee idk

It's so funny you asked this - I was already writing another Mean Marco drabble! I completely agree with you. I think Marco is very tightly wound under that calm facade. He's a doctor dealing with 997 idiots (excluding Izou and Deuce), 1 Portgas D. Ace (he's in his own category), and the Captain is a stubborn old man who won't take his pills.

I do think Izou could come off as a little mean but I agree that he mostly keeps his wits about him. I could see Izou drinking tea and watching while you ride the Sybian, noting the different sounds you make and how they differ from other forms of stimulation. Or Izou teasing you endlessly as you're bound to his bedframe spread eagle, never quite touching where you need him to, agreeing with you that yes, it is quite difficult. And no, he's not going to stop until he's done.

But Marco.

Oh, Marco.

NSFW Drabble, Marco x F!Reader , ~1k (oops), mean but consensual Marco

Stress Ball

“Marco, is - oh, I guess you’re in here alone then,” Tate said, poking her head in Marco’s office. The First Division Commander smiled as he picked his head up from some reports, his red glasses resting on the end of his nose.

“Just me yoi,” he confirmed, setting down the quill he’d been using for note taking. 

“OK, no worries. But are you alright? You looked really worked up before," Tate asked, searching Marco’s face for answers.

“Ah, you know how it is. Too many patients, not enough doctors and nurses,” Marco said with an easy smile. Tate nodded and gave a knowing laugh.

“Yeah, trust me I get it. I just think you have it harder than anyone else on board. You’re in charge of our division, you’re responsible for keeping everyone safe, you’re the primary doctor for the crew, you’re basically the First Mate, and you have to give that stubborn old man all his medicine. If I was you I would have cracked a long time ago. Speaking of, I’ve been looking for - oh, nevermind. Hope you find some kind of stress relief - I can cover for you in a bit if you want to go flying?” Tate offered her longtime friend.

“I appreciate it but there’s no need yoi. I’m buried up to my neck in paperwork and besides, I found a way to blow off some steam earlier. I’m feeling pretty good right now,” Marco said, picking up his quill once more. Tate nodded and smiled, already turning to leave the office.

“Sounds great boss…I’ll go look for her in the baths then, she said she was stressed earlier…” Tate said mostly to herself, her voice getting quieter the further down the hall she went from Marco’s office. He smiled to himself then continued to write, turning the pages slowly and straightening them as needed. After about half an hour, he heard some sounds coming from the slim coat closet set in the adjacent wall. Standing up, he stretched his arms over his head, his toned stomach peeking through as his shirt rode up. Striding over to the closet, he opened the door and enjoyed the sight before his eyes.

You were inside, head moving towards the movement of air. You couldn’t see or hear him, the blindfold and headphones he’d put on you didn’t allow for any light or sound. You were shifting around, trying to find a comfortable position but Marco had ensured there wasn’t one. You were sitting on your poor red bottom on the floor of the closet, your wrists bound to your crossed ankles. The two vibrators that Marco had placed in your holes were still going but at a low hum, your slick fluids dripping down your thighs and into a small puddle on the floor. Marco squatted down next to you, causing you to search once again for the source of the movement. 

The large spider gag prevented you from calling out to him but the drool leaking from your mouth joined the rest of the slick mess you’d been making. He noted that your chest and face were still covered in his cum from earlier as he ran his thumb through the fluids. Placing his coated thumb in your open mouth, your tongue roved over the digit and sucked as much as you could. Pleased, Marco removed your headphones, making your head jerk in his direction.

“You’re being too loud yoi. I can hear you moving around all the way from my desk,” Marco cooed into your ear. He palmed your breasts in his hands, rolling your already pert nipples in his fingers. After only a few moments of pinching and teasing you were panting and straining against the bindings he’d lovingly put on your hours before but making as little noise as you could.

“You wouldn’t want anyone to find you like this, would you yoi? You shook your head rapidly while a blush rose in your cheeks.

“Then you need to be quieter, hm? Let’s see if you can be a good little thing for me,” Marco said affectionately, petting your hair. Reaching into his pocket he removed a heavy chain with teeth clamps on either end. Putting his hand on your back for support, he dipped his head low and nipped and kissed your breast, leaving a trail of hickeys until he reached your nipple. Sucking hard, he laved his tongue over the sensitive bud until your chest was heaving. Pulling away his head with an audible pop, he quickly placed the clamp on your nipple. You whined softly as he repeated the process with your other nipple until both were clamped between the teeth of the metal binding.

“Ah ah. Not so loud or I’ll have to leave the door open yoi. You don’t want the rest of the crew to see how needy you are do you? I think another 30 minutes here would help us both, hm? I’m feeling relaxed already and I’m sure you are too,” Marco said with a grin, pulling on the chain gently. You pushed your chest up to alleviate the pain from the clamps but that caused the large plug in your ass to be ground in further. Marco looked you over, putting his index and middle finger into your fist. 

“Once for green, twice for yellow, three times for red,” he said softly, waiting for your response. You gave him two hard squeezes and he kissed your cheek.

“I felt yellow. Again, just to make sure I got the right one. Once for green, twice for yellow, three times for red,” he repeated. Just as before you squeezed his fingers twice, leaving no room for error. 

 “Doing so well, Doveling, just a little more,” he whispered into your ear. He replaced the headphones, kissed the top of your head and shut the door to the closet. Humming happily he sat down at his desk to finish the last of his paperwork. He’d be done soon and he’d make you come around his cock until you cried for him to stop. That would alleviate your stress, he thought with a grin.

[lizbetlovesbyler]

“The Chemistry Test” Theory

(How the Duffers demonstrate romantic AND platonic chemistry in Stranger Things’ relationships)

When one character starts singing, how does the other react? Are they in harmony?

(alternatively: do they match each others freak?)

“Chemistry” describes the emotional connection between two characters in a relationship. This can be either romantic, platonic, both, or neither.

We know that the Duffer brothers highlighted the importance of music in Stranger Things 4, so let’s look back on it’s uses in earlier seasons.

I’ve noticed a lot of parallels between scenes that focus on the relationship between two characters. One of these two characters will sing, and the other has one of two reactions:

Indulge in the fun

Try and shut it down

Depending on their reaction, we can conclude a lot about what the Duffers want to communicate about the chemistry between two characters.

So let’s look at 6 examples:

Exhibit A: Dustin and Suzie

https://youtu.be/ehtsmxu1w10?si=CGnKM5PubO5lC-V4

This - I think - is the most glaringly obvious example of how the Duffers like to demonstrate chemistry between two characters. Mostly because this scene is purposefully very memorable.

Dustin and Suzie have clearly sung this many times before, we know this because Dustin immediately knows what Suzie wants from him just from her saying “I want to hear it”

At first, he’s embarrassed - all of his friends are listening, friends who didn’t believe until now that Suzie even existed. He doesn’t want to sing it in front of them.

But when Suzie joins in, he’s actually able to forget about the danger they’re all in, he’s doesn’t care everyone is listening, he’s able to indulge. Because he loves Suzie, these moments bring him joy. They bring Suzie joy, too. Just look at this shot of them together, despite being states apart. Because they are in harmony, the distance between them doesn’t matter.

These two cutie patooties pass the chemistry test with flying colours.

Exhibit B: Max and Lucas

(Max and Lucas are presumably also in a relationship at this point in the series, and they don’t break up until after.)

As another couple, the two are mocking Dustin for his relationship - making kissy faces at him and calling him “Dusty-bun”.

However, whilst doing so, they are demonstrating their own chemistry - synchronous clapping, smiling at each other, holding eye contact. When they start singing the second time, they need nothing more than a look from the other before they start again from the same lyric.

Max and Lucas may not have the same romantic dynamic as Dustin and Suzie, after all no two couples are the same, but they will sing to make lighthearted fun at their friend.

It should also be noted that Max didn’t even hear Dustin’s original rendition, she had to hear about the whole ordeal from the others, I’ll wager Lucas sang it enough to Dustin that she picked up on it and joined in. She indulged in the fun.

If Lucas and Max did not have chemistry, Max would’ve been at most only slightly amused in Lucas’ mockery, but she would not have joined in on it (similar to Mike) and might have even told him to knock it off during the time skip if he continued doing it.

These two pass the chemistry test.

Exhibit C: Mike and Eleven

Might be time to start contrasting these examples to other scenes in the same season.

This is our first look at Mike and Eleven as an official couple - and what I would label as the start of their downfall.

(may make a whole post dedicated to this one scene because it speaks volumes about Mike and Els relationship and what the Duffers want us to take away from it in retrospect)

This scene is special because it’s not like the writers are trying to make it glaringly obvious that Mike and El are not a compatible couple. Rather, this scene is disguised as a cute (albeit slightly awkward) scene, hell - i thought it was cute when i first watched it (I was also, you know, 12, but whatever, I’m now 17 I have a very different idea of what romantic relationships actually look like).

It’s only later when we gather the other examples in this post and compare them we can start to see that somethings not quite right with these two cutie pies.

Even whilst they’re still kissing, Mike is pushing Els hands away from him - already not a good sign.

When he pulls away to sing, it’s because he wants a break from constant kissing. From my own experience, I can tell you that making out is very exhausting (especially when you don’t have a lot of chemistry with the person you’re locking lips with).

El reacts very quickly by covering his mouth, she calls his name to grab his attention, she tells him to stop, she gives him a look that just says “What are you doing?”. This is her trying to shut him down. She is not indulging in the fun, even though Mike is trying to make her - he shakes her and her arms, he maintains eye contact. He asks her if she likes it, and she says “No!”.

If the Duffers wanted to portray Mike and El as a couple with chemistry, a better way to portray that could have been to have them just sitting and reading their own respective magazines, when Mike sings, El could have smiled and bopped her head along despite likely not knowing the words. They could have demonstrated that the two enjoy each others company even when they’re not making out, that they are still close, and a kiss goodbye to make it clear to the audience they still have a romantic dynamic.

This scene doesn’t just not do that, it does the opposite. Mike and El are only interested in kissing. When they break up later, it’s for comedic relief.

These two unfortunately do not pass the chemistry test.

Now, due to the very thick romantic tone of this scene, we can conclude that Mike and El do not have romantic chemistry, but we cannot make any conclusions about their platonic chemistry.

What does platonic chemistry look like with Eleven, you ask?

Exhibit D: Max and Eleven

This example is slightly less noticeable, but this scene starts in Elevens room, a parallel to the previous example with Mike.

Max is singing along to the radio, much like Mike was, the only difference is Els reaction. Instead of trying to shut her down, she is bopping her head along to the music. She may not be singing along, but she is still indulging in Max’s behaviour, she’s having fun.

Max and Eleven have platonic chemistry.

Exhibit E: Steve and Nancy

Let’s now look at the very first example of this Chemistry Test the show gives us, way back in season one. It’s so small you may have missed it.

I think this is a very good example of how interactions like these are a two way street.

(For context, Steve is apologising to Nancy for his lack of empathy towards Barbs disappearance, and tries to invite her to a movie to take her mind off it all - note that Nancy is yet to verbally forgive Steve in this scene)

Nancy goes through a lot in the first season, I don’t doubt that even if her and Steve shared romantic chemistry, that she still wouldn’t be in the mood for a little sing song. But Steve still sings to her anyway, he hasn’t picked up on how distraught she is over Barbs disappearance, and how “pretending everything is normal” is not something she wants to do.

What she wants is to go out and look for Barbara with Jonathan - Steve later misinterprets this as them hooking up, completely ignorant to the fact that they both have lost someone they care deeply for when they both feel they could have prevented it (Jonathan was not supposed to be working that evening and Nancy convinced Barb to come to Steve’s even though she didn’t actually want to)

It’s clear Steve is genuinely trying to make amends with her in this scene, but there is still a glaring disconnect in their emotions because Steve does not apologise proportionally to the distress Nancy is in. When he sings to her and tries to make her laugh, he is demonstrating this lack of understanding of her needs and emotions. Of course she doesn’t laugh, she looks away awkwardly and eventually shuts him down.

The lack of chemistry between these two is demonstrated by Steve singing in the first place, then confirmed when Nancy does not indulge.

These two, unsurprisingly, do not pass.

Exhibit F: Steve and Robin

(Skip to the end of this video for a refresher)

This is a very intimate conversation. This time, Steve appreciates that it takes a lot of trust for someone like Robin to talk about what she just has. It takes a lot of love from Robins end to be honest with him as to why they can’t be a couple.

Trust and love that didn’t come from no where, I’ll remind you.

He reacts the way he does because he values Robin as a friend, and as friends do, he picks apart and judges her crushes.

Steve doesn’t have to grasp at straws for something to say, despite having never been in this situation before, despite having never even thought about being in this situation before. He just talks. The right words come out of his mouth because they have that shared love and trust. He just talks and says the right thing because he feels and thinks the right things.

He sings because it’s appropriate for their dynamic and his approach to this conversation as her friend, she indulges to confirm that they are in harmony now their relationship is defined as platonic.

These two have undeniable chemistry. Id argue this is the best example of this Chemistry Test because it’s such a raw and real interaction, even if it only demonstrates a strong platonic bond.

(I would love to see some sort of parallel with Mike and Eleven in S5)

“Great! We have a theory about how the Duffer brothers have previously demonstrated Chemistry, with evidence to support it! … Now what?”

Now we apply it to Season 5 Speculation!

I bring to you a whole three possible applications of this theory.

Number 1: Robin and Vickie

Crucial detail that loads of people overlook about Robin and Vickie - they’re both in band.

We’re constantly reminded of it, too.

Steve to Robin: “You’re worried about a high school pep rally, you expect me to believe that? […] This is about Vickie!”

Our first look at Vickie is during said pep rally, we see Vickie and Robin standing side by side, sharing a glance during the band performance.

We see them interact later that night, during band (again), whilst Tammy Thompson sings the national anthem.

Dustin to Eddie s4 e02: “You know Robin! From band!”

Vickie to her boyfriend when he asks who Robin is: “Someone from band.”

Robin and Vickie are in harmony, even in their limited on screen interactions, because they both play music together.

It’s also worth noting that both of their instruments are wind instruments. We know that the both of them struggle to stop themselves from rambling, so their best interactions are during band, they do not have to worry about finding the right words because they literally cannot talk.

According to the Duffer Brothers, Robin and Vickie have chemistry. Rovickie endgame - next please!

Number 2: Steve and Nancy

Let’s be so fr they are not getting back together.

This post is one of many arguments as to why they should not and will not become a couple again in s5.

I said “next, please!”

Number 3: Will and Mike

Stay with me, now.

Small throwaway scene? Maybe, yeah, but i’ll add that the exact frame Will sings here is the thumbnail for this episode.

Do with that information what you will.

In this scene, Mike is making a plan to find El by getting help from Suzie. Will is the only one who picks up on Mikes plan, and sings the Never-ending Story theme to remind the others who haven’t yet picked up on it. Basic example of show don’t tell.

Contrary to Steve and Nancy, Will sings because Mike and him are already in harmony. They’re on the same page about “Utah” meaning “Suzie”.

This is one of the many examples in season 4 alone where Mike and Will do not need to communicate with words to pick up what the other puts down.

You could say that these two have quite a good rhythm, their interactions seem to flow seamlessly, and when they don’t ( *cough* airport reunion) it sticks out like a sore thumb.

I cant find a clip of the scene I can link here, but think of that scene where they’re formatting a lie for Suzie in her room as to why they need these coordinates, and it’s complete improv and such a natural flowing lie despite the fact they’ve never discussed it before.

And if we’re defining chemistry as a measure of emotional connection, well, which two characters have the most heart-to-heart, ‘lethal dose of emotion’ interactions this season?

yeah…quite a few more than average.

And that’s just season four! Mike and Will share emotionally intimate moments like these throughout the seasons.

So, will we get to see some more musical interactions this next season? If we do, i’ll place my bets on these two getting fed a version of our Chemistry Test.

Love to hear other people’s thoughts!

[aerynwrites]

Peace

Simon "Ghost" Riley x John "Soap" MacTavish

A/N: Sorry for the delay in posting anything lately lol - my writing motivation has been in the toilet. But hopefully it's back now and I just had to get this little piece out for the holidays. I hope you enjoy! Word Count: 4k Warnings: so much fluff, fluff galore, fluff mountain, slightly insecure simon, (possibly ooc simon??), mentions of praying before a meal, again just lots of fluff.

Simon “Ghost” Riley doesn’t get nervous. 

Nerves, anxiety, fear - it was all beat out of him by his piece-of-shit excuse for a father. Then further beat out of him in the military. Nervousness died with the first Simon Riley, buried six feet underground never to be heard from again.

So why the bloody fuck are his hands sweating?

He’s wiped them on the fabric of his jeans at least a dozen times as they drive down the desolate stretch of road in nowhere Scotland. Johnny talking his ear off the whole time - mostly about his family. 

The family Simon is about to meet. 

Fuck…what was he thinking, agreeing to this?

Thinking you don’t want to be alone again on the holidays, that’s what.

Simon shakes his head, chasing the thought away as quick as it’d come. 

He’s been alone all his life. He didn’t need anyone. Yet, when Johnny had whispered the request, a simple one really - into the darkness of the room one night as they shared a bed…Simon couldn’t say no. 

“Come home with me, Si.”

That was less than a week ago, and the Scott followed through on his promise, helping Simon pack his bags before all but whisking him away for a few weeks holiday with his family. 

His very large family. 

Of course Simon knew of Johnny’s parents and sisters and brother, but Johnny had warned him that the whole extended family gets together for Christmas. He’d been regaling Simon with dozens of tales from his childhood, each one with a different family member. And try as he might, Simon couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at his lips as he continued, sweaty palms forgotten the longer Johnny talked. 

The small moment of reprieve didn’t last long, however, because sooner than Simon was ready for they were turning off the main road onto a side street. That side street quickly gave way to a long gravel drive, and before he knew it Johnny had parked the car behind at least half a dozen others in front of a large house. 

The first thing Simon noticed was the sheer normal-ness of the place. All the cars were practical ones, SUVs, sedans - made for families. The house was decorated modestly but tastefully. Colorful string lights lined the gutters and porch railings, a wreath hung on the door, and a large wooden sign leaned up against the front of the house beside the door that read ‘Merry Christmas!’ In bold red letters. 

But more than that, Simon could see into the house. The blinds are open and he can see many people milling about, talking, laughing, adults running after small children-

“This wasn’t a good idea, Johnny.”

The words are out before Simon can stop them, and he instantly regrets them the moment they bring a wounded look to his partner's face. But he can’t help it. His damn palms are sweaty again and his heart is racing and he can’t-

Johnny reaches over to slide a familiar calloused hand into his own, giving it a reassuring squeeze. 

“It’ll be okay, Simon. They’re gonna love ya’-”

Simon can’t help the small huff of bitter laughter that slips from beneath his mask. “Will they?” He asks, before gesturing to the cloth covering his face. 

“You’re tellin’ me the kids won’t run screamin’, the moment they see me? Or that your family won’t stare at the giant with a bloody mask-”

Simon cuts himself off, shaking his head. 

“I shouldn’t ‘ave come,” he repeats sullenly, “You go in. Enjoy the holiday with your family. I saw a hotel not too far back, I can-”

“No, no, no, none of that shite,” Johnny interjects, voice firm. A tone he doesn’t take with Simon often. 

“I’ve told them all about you,” he finally admits, “mask an’ all.” He laughs softly. “The only thing Ma ‘ad to say about it was askin’ why you chose a skull.”

Simon is silent, warring with himself as Johnny continues. 

“And…you don’t ‘ave to wear it if you don’t want to,” he suggests lightly, before squeezing Simon’s hand again. “I wouldn’t ‘ave suggested you come if I dinnae think they’d like ya’. My family is important to me, Si. And you’re part of tha’ now.”

Simon didn’t have time to respond this time before Johnny’s out of the car and opening the trunk to get their bags. He’s thinking out loud again, wondering if his mother made his favorite side dish or dessert, wondering if his nephews would be here.

Simon is listening but he also isn’t, his mind running one hundred miles a minute until the trunk slams closed and Simon lets out a muttered curse before ripping the balaclava off his head and shoving it in his pocket as he steps from the vehicle. He doesn’t miss the shocked raise of the Scott’s eyebrows as he comes around the car before it melts into that fucking smile that plagues Simons waking moments. 

Simon takes his bag from Johnny’s hand before following him up the drive then up the steps of the porch. He waits patiently as Johnny grabs the door handle, knocking when he finds it’s locked. Every moment of waiting feels like an eternity for Simon, all possible scenarios running through his mind. The door swinging open and everyone inside coming to a stand still as they take in the monster Johnny brought with him. The children pointing and whispering about the scars marring his features. Johnny’s parent’s frowning in disapproval at the choice their son made…

It’s all playing out in front of his very eyes until a soft feminine voice calls out from the other side of the door - ‘coming!’ - and then the lock clicks and the door swings open and an older woman that looks eerily similar to his partner beams up at them both.

“Johnathan!” She says reverently, wistfully, as she wraps her son in a hug so fierce Simon’s momentarily worried she might injure him. 

But Johnny just laughs and drops his bag as he wraps his big arms around his mother, stooping down to envelop her entirely as he embraces her, tucking his head into her neck. 

“I’m home, Ma.”

The embrace lasts for the perfect amount of time before they pull away from one another, and it’s then, as Mrs. MacTavish holds her son at arms length - looking over him - that her eyes flit over to Simon, and the inevitable has finally come. 

Except there’s no hatred. No disgust or disapproval or furrowed brows. Instead there’s a smile just as big as she gave Johnny and before Simon can react the woman is approaching him.

“You must be, Simon,” she says, voice gentle - warm and welcoming. 

All Simon can do is nod, gripping onto his duffel bag with white knuckles. 

“Johnathan never stops talking about you-”

“Ma!” Johnny reprimands.

“Talking about you and your team and how…” she trails off, a sadness settling into her eyes before she steps forward and wraps Simon in an embrace he hasn’t felt since his own mother passed. 

It’s strong and grounding, yet soft and inviting all at the same time, and it catches Simon so off guard that this woman who barely reaches his chest is hugging him - that all he can think to do is wrap his free arm lamely around her shoulders. 

“Thank you for keeping him safe.”

The words are so soft, uttered into the cotton of Simon's shirt, that he’s surprised he hears them. But he does, and he gives her a gentle squeeze. 

“I wouldn’t let anything happen to him,” he assures her.

He looks to Johnny as his mother pulls away from him, and he has to stop himself from rolling his eyes at the smug ‘I told you so’ look on the scott’s face. 

Mrs. MacTavish smiles again before stepping back towards the house. “Well, come on then, you’re just in time, really. Dinner is goin’ to be ready within the hour.”

She opens the door back up and steps inside and Johnny follows close behind her, looking back when Simon hesitates. He gives him a reassuring look, shifting his bag to his other hand so he can reach a hand out to him. Letting out a small resigned huff, Simon takes the hand offer to him and lets himself be tugged into the house. 

Warmth envelopes him almost immediately- not only in the temperature sense because of the roaring fire in the fireplace at the center of the living room - but also in the atmosphere. The lights around the house are soft and welcoming, none of the bright fluorescents that litter the base. And the general sense in the house is one of pure love and happiness and joy. Children running around, adults laughing and chatting happily with drinks in their hands. Even the Christmas tree, bursting with colorfully wrapped gifts beneath it adds to the overall feel. 

It gives Simon whiplash - how different this place is than the environments he’s usually in. It’s not like the cinderblock dorm he usually stays in or the concrete gym he frequents or even the various dangerous countries he travels to for missions. 

Simon wants to both run and never leave at the same time. And unfortunately for him, he doesn’t get a chance to do the former. Before he has a chance to disappear into some dark corner (not that there’s many to be seen in this cozy home) Johnny is introducing him to all the family that stops them as they come in. 

Aunts, uncles, cousins, nephews, nieces, grandparents…the only ones Simon really has time to remember are his sisters because Johnny talks about them all the time anyways - and once again, Simon is startled into near silence. Not a single one of them gives him a sideways glance. They all just smile warmly at him when Johnny introduces him, giving him a firm handshake - or let’s be honest - most of them wrap him in a firm hug. He expected nothing less from Johnny’s family. 

And when Johnny does end up getting pulled away by rambunctious nieces and nephews and Simon is left alone, he still doesn’t get a chance to slip away because Johnny’s sisters are sliding up to him, chatting about anything and nothing and slipping a drink into his hand (spike eggnog which Simon pretends not to enjoy as much as he does). 

It’s how ended up where he is now, hating feeling useless and standing around, he’s bustling around the kitchen with Johnny’s sisters, Amelia and Isobel and Mrs. MacTavish.

“Call me Moira, Simon. Mrs. MacTvish is my mother-in-law.”

(He doesn’t. Can’t. Not yet at least.)

“Simon,” Amelia, calls from the gargantuan dining room table in the room connected to the kitchen, “Can you grab the trivets? Dinnae want to leave rings on the table-”

“Oh!” Isobel calls as well, from where she’s playing the silverware, “I forgot the napkins too-”

Simon, with trivets already tucked beneath his arms, swoops up the delicately folded napkins on his way into the dining room - “On it.”

He places the trivett's precisely where the sisters direct him, unable to stop the small smile from tugging at his lips when they practically groan in appreciation when he places the napkins on top of the plates that are set out.

“Finally,” Amelia explains, moving to help Isobel set the silverware, “A man who isn’t entirely clueless-”

“Right?” Isobel agrees, both of them laughing.

Simon lets out a chuckle of his own, shrugging his shoulders. 

“We didn’ do much as a family when I was younger,” he starts, slightly hesitant. “But my Mum never skipped a holiday meal. Showed me how to set the table,” he says softly, feeling like he revealed too much. 

But the sisters just smile brightly at him, and Simon has to shove down the voice screaming ‘wrong, wrong, wrong! You don’t deserve their kindness, their sympathy-‘

“Well, your mum sounds like a lovely, woman,” Amelia says, before Isobel pipes in. 

“Are you and Johnny going to visit your family after us?”

Simon freezes at that, shoulders tensing as he tries and fails to stop the frown from tugging at his lips. He pretends not to see the way Amelia elbows her sister, sending her a scathing look as he continues to place napkins, now avoiding their eyes. 

“I uh-” he clears his throat. “My family’s passed. Jus’ me now.”

It’s silent for a moment, before he feels a gentle squeeze on his shoulder and he startles slightly, not having heard Mrs. MacTavish come up behind him in his inner grief. He turns to see yet another one of those blinding smiles on her face, a smile so similar to Johnny’s. He freezes again as her hand slides down to cover Simon’s, her hand tiny against his own larger one. 

“Well,” she says softly, “You always have a place at our table, Simon. You’re our family now.”

She turns away before he can speak and as she calls out to the family that dinner is ready, he’s silently glad she did, because he doesn’t know if he’d be able to speak around the lump in his throat. 

———

The family helps carry the food out to the table, and Simon can’t help but be impressed at the bountiful display of food, his stomach rumbling at the sight. Johnny finds him in the slight chaos, taking his hand in his own as he leads him to two seats towards the head of the table, just as everyone else is taking their seats. Johnny’s mother is at the head of the table, Amelia and Isobel and their partners and children to her left and Johnny and Simon to her right. He can’t help but feel like he’s too high up on the totem pole that is family seating. Hell, he doesn’t feel like he deserves to be here at all. 

Yet, when Mrs. MacTavish insist they all hold hands to say a prayer and she goes through the typical spiel, any doubt he has melts away when she says thanks for Johnny’s safety, Simon’s own name falling shortly behind before the entire table closes the prayer and Johnny squeezes his hand in that loving way that always makes his heart stutter. 

As quickly as the silence that fell over the table during grace came, it was gone in an instant. Soft shatter and laughter soon starts up as everyone passes dishes of food around. A lot of the things Simon recognizes; ham, mashed potatoes, and various other comfort food sides litter the table. But there are also some dishes that are unfamiliar to Simon, and Johnny is quick to explain them. Most of them are Scottish dishes he’s never heard of, but some are family recipes that have evolved over the years - all of them Johnny’s favorites.

“Oh, you ‘ave to try this one Si, it’s my favorite-”

“You’ve said tha’ about the last three dishes, Johnny-”

The Scott just laughs, “But this time I mean it.”

Soon, Simon’s plate is piled so high with food he’s concerned he won’t be able to eat it all (he does…and goes back for seconds). And he has to constantly remind himself not to eat like a military man - hunched over his plate, shoveling food in as fast as possible to be done in time - something he notices Johnny has to do as well. 

Simon smiles - and for the first time since he left base a few days ago, his palms have stopped sweating. 

———

The night is quiet as Simon steps outside of the still chattering household. Dinner ended a few hours ago, and ever the dutiful guest, Simon helped clean up before the events were moved to the living room. Presents were shared among family, mainly the kids. Colorful wrapping paper littering the floor and the couches and the chairs (and even the fireplace on one occasion, a disaster Simon managed to catch and stomp out before it went too far.) He and Johnny sat on the couch, the latter watching and oozing happiness from every pore as he soaked in the family he hadn't seen in too long. Hell, even Simon was sated - a little too much like a cat in a sun patch with his belly full and his inhibitions slightly dulled from that damn eggnog. 

But now…Simon felt the ever present itch to step away, that familiar feeling of otherness creeping back in as he feels like an intruder to something so cozy and intimate. 

You don’t belong here, that voice mutters again, sounding strangely similar to his father’s rasping voice as he slides the back door open and steps onto the back porch.

He tugs a cigarette from the pack in his coat pocket, placing it between his lips before grabbing the zippo Johnny had gifted him almost a year ago. 

‘It’s the twenty-first century, L.T. quit usin’ matches.’

Simon huffed out a small laugh at the memory as he flicked the wheel of the lighter, a small flame sparking to life and warming his palm as he cups his hand around it and brings to the end of the cigarette, taking a deep drag to light it. 

The soft sound of the sliding glass door reaches his ears just as he flicks the lighter closed and stows it away, and he knows who it is almost instantly, the footsteps familiar to him. 

Johnny doesn’t speak right away, instead coming to stand shoulder to shoulder with Simon just as the first few flurries start to fall from the sky. 

Snow…

Simon can’t remember the last time he saw snow - well - saw snow in a pleasant way. Snow that wasn’t waist deep and in the Russian wilderness and keeping his team from reaching the safe house. Snow that wasn’t stained red or crushed into brown slurry beneath his boots. 

Maybe this trip would change that - like it’s changed a lot of things. 

“Thank you.”

The words are simple, but soft. Softer than they have a right to be coming from a man like Simon. A man who has more blood on his hands than most. A man who most people would run from the second they looked at him. 

But he means them. He means them with his whole heart and he hopes that Johnny understands everything Simon is trying to say with those two simple words. 

Thank you for inviting me here. Thank you for trusting me with your family. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for putting up with me. Thank you for loving the unlovable and showing me this and -

Johnny shrugs, and the rustle of fabric breaks off Simon’s train of thought as he glances over at his partner from the corner of his eyes. 

“I want you ‘ere, Si,” Johnny says softly, eyes looking out into the wilderness beyond the backyard, into the stars littering the night sky, “I ‘ave for a long time, and I…”

He trails off, clearing his throat, and Simon doesn’t miss the way he fiddles with something in his pocket. 

“I love you, Simon,” he says gently, finally tearing his eyes away from the celestial lights above him to look at Simon in a way that he’s never been looked at before. “And I meant wha’ I said. You’re part of this now,” he gestures back to the house still brimming with life, love, and happiness. “And I was wonderin’…” he trails off again, letting out a frustrated sound. 

“Ah, I’m shite at this…”

Simon huffs out a laugh, “Spit it out, Johnny-”

Now it’s Johnny’s turn to laugh, shaking his head as he pulls out a little velvet box from his jacket pocket. “Your makin’ this real ‘ard to be all romantic an’ shit-” he rolls his eyes, but even in the dimness of the moonlight Simon doesn’t miss the way Johnny’s cheeks redden. 

Realistically Simon knows what’s in the box - he knows what’s coming. Yet, he still can’t help the way his heart leaps into his throat when Johnny opens the box to reveal a simple gold ring. No frills, no getting on one knee and professing his love, no fancy dinner. 

It was never their thing anyways. 

“Simon Riley,” Johnny says, voice slightly choked, nervous, “Will you marry me?”

Simon never truly knew what he would do in this situation- fuck, he never imagined this scenario. Ever. Not in a million years. And if he did - he always thought he’d be the one asking.

“Johnny…”

The Scott cuts him off, “now before you go an’ start all that self-deprecatin’ bullshi-”

“Johnny-” Simon tries again.

“I love you! An’ I know that-”

Simon lets out a low growl, once stemming from slight annoyance as he flicks his cigarette out and away from him in favor of taking Johnny’s face in his calloused palms and pressing lips firmly to his. It shuts the Scott up, and Simon can’t stop that stupid giddy feeling that he gets when familiar hands wrap around his waist. 

It doesn’t last long, just long enough for Simon to get the point across, and then he’s pulling away resting his forehead against Johnny’s. 

“If you’d let me get a bloody word out, I’d tell you yes.”

Johnny pauses at that - eyes widening slightly in that way that Simon always thinks looks like a puppy begging for more treats. 

“Really?”

Simon scoffs, not unkindly, and pulls away his hand still cupping warm cheeks. 

“Why’d ya ask if ya thought I’d say no?”

Johnny blushes at that, looking away, “Well I didnae think you’d say no…” he shrugs, “Just thought you’d take more convincin’ is all.”

Now it’s Simon’s turn to roll his eyes, as he finally drops his hands, holding his left one out slightly. 

“You gonna make me put it on myself?”

Johnny laughs then, a real laugh, the loud one that Simon pretends to hate but really truly loves - and then Johnny is taking the ring from the box and sliding it on Simon's left ring finger with more delicacy than he deserves. The metal is cool, smooth as it slides against his overheated skin, and as it sit snugly on his finger, Simon can’t help but flex them, the metal glinting in the moonlight.

“You picked good, Johnny,” he says lamely, not sure what else to say until he glances at Johnny’s left hand. 

“Now I need to get you one,” he says, “Can’t have people thinkin’ you’re single.”

Johnny smiles, digging around in his jeans pocket this time before producing an identical gold band to his own. “Way ahead of ya, L.T.”

Johnny goes to slide the band on, but Simon stops him, taking the metal ring from his fingers with a grumble of ‘hold it sergeant’ before he slips it over his ring finger. He doesn’t miss the way Johnny smiles down at their hands, all wrapped together as he gazes at the matching rings. 

Simon opens his mouth to say something, but a bright white flash of light from his left stops him and Johnny in their tracks. They both look over just in time to see Isobel fumbling with her phone behind the glass sliding door as Amelia scolds her and Mrs. MacTavish just gives her son a small thumbs up and watery smile. 

Johnny just groans and runs a hand down his face as the three women scatter, leaving them alone once more. 

“Steamin’ Jesus,” he rolls his eyes, “Sorry ‘bout them-”

Simon shakes his head, taking Johnny’s hand in his own as he turns to face the backyard again, thumb already running over the smooth metal ring. 

“Don’t worry about it, Johnny,” he says, waving him off. “I…it’s nice. Having a family again.”

Johnny smiles, giving Simon’s hand a soft squeeze before they both settle into a comfortable silence to watch the snow fall from the sky above them. 

And as the muffled sounds of Christmas music and soft chatter filter out from the house and Simon holds Johnny close…He can’t help but send a silent thought to his mother and brother. Wherever they are.

‘I’m not alone.’

The gentle kiss of a breeze answers him, whispering against his cheeks and wrapping around his legs, and for the first time since he can remember - 

Simon is at peace. 

[thenighttimeparadise]

The fact for most people, having acrylic nails, wearing make up, doing your hair, doing skin care, wearing skirts/dresses, wearing heels, ect. is considered feminine and things women biologically want/need to do or should do because it's "feminine" is crazy to me.

Let's unpack this.

So... acrylic nails. Putting shit on your nails to make them longer/ more colourful. Why might this be seen as "feminine"? Females usually have longer, thinner fingers, which longer nail help make the appearance of, women usually biologically have longer nails like they have longer hair, and they're expected to care more about their appearance. Why don't these things actually explain this phenomenon? Long fingers could be considered attractive for both men and women, they are attractive for women mainly because they look dainty and bc subconsciously society want women to spend more time on their looks so when you see a women with longer, painted nails it looks right bc she spent time and money to be feminine and to look "right" (society wants women to suffer, whether you admit it or not, the idea of femininity is to hate yourself quietly, I can expand on that if you'd like). Also, while females have longer nails and hair biologically (on average and on a pretty small amount) men also biologically grow hair and nails. Like, men used to have shoulder length hair and women had hair to their waist. The fact men have shorter hair now is bc of the army. Fight me on this. If this was according to biology it would masculine to have hair to your shoulders or lower back and somewhat longer nails, but it's not. My point here isn't to say that it's untrue that female biologically have longer hair and nails, but that these standards can change according to socialization, and we did change them for men, so much so that we won't consider some biologically masculine stuff masculine. Bc it's mostly socialization. The idea that women are the prettier sex, even as an empowering thing, is simply incorrect, and I do want y'all to understand that if we wanted to decide males are the beautiful sex we could change that in our minds in like one generation.

The wearing heels/dresses/skirts is just pure bullshit, forgive me for the way I'm wording this but these are pieces of a fabric, and while one can argue dresses and skirts could feminine to accentuate the "female silhouette" as in making the body look more curvy, I want to remind you that you're very subjective and what you're attracted to and what you find beauty in is about 76% due to socialization. I promise you if you were born 100 years ago you'd have different opinions about what is and isn't attractive. Sure some stuff will remain, like being hygienic, having clear skin and straight teeth and not being overly obese or thin, since these things are just signs of being unhealthy (even though some people don't care about these things I just mean generally speaking in the way our body and brain processes things), so many other things you might think are attractive for you bc of biology, such as facial features, height, body type (you can be as fertile without having small waist as someone with tiny waist, it's about having breasts and body hair [signs of fertility and sexual maturity] And while both of those aren't sexual [while breasts are a sign of fertility that doesn't mean they're inherently sexual just like beards are a sign of sexual maturity but they aren't inherently sexual] Yk what that raises the question of what is inherently sexual and I have an answer, tell me/write an ask about it if you wanna know but ANYWAY beauty changes over the years so being an hourglass figure isn't necessarily the 'objectively' most attractive a women can look.

[amberjazmyn]

f1 drivers as christmas songs🫶

pairing : m.verstappen, l.norris, c.sainz, o.piastri, c.leclerc, d.ricciardo

summary : mostly innaccurate but, a christmas song that i think matches these above formula drivers.

warnings : absolutely none lol

a/n : don't @ me but i'm really wanting to release a decent-ish amount of fic-mas fics before christmas ends let alone begins so forgive me if these are crap lol

max verstappen

silent night

i have no idea why silent night came to mind for max but, it just did.

i just feel like max loves christmases that are just relaxed, not too much effort

and i feel like he doesn't like it when he has to go to multiple different christmas get togethers

all because he just wants to be at home with his cats and with his immediate family

he loves a calm but bright christmas

whilst he may not be religious, christmas can feel holy at the same time for him

does he sleep in heavenly peace like the song suggests?

i definitely think he does because he doesn't have to worry about the race season until the new year

which means i think he also doesn't care what he eats or how much he eats

and it's because he knows he won't have to really worry about not losing it because he'll still make sure to occasionally train at the gym every once in a while

the main thing about christmas he enjoyed wasn't all the presents he got but the love he got to be surrounded by

lando norris

last christmas

the only real reason why last christmas came to mind was because of lando's ex-girlfriend luisa

i truly think lando really loved luisa more than he loved any other of his ex girlfriend's

hence why i think the lyrics 'i gave you my heart but the very next day, you gave it away' really screams lando to me as a christmas song

do i think lando has tried to save himself from tears and giving his heart to someone special?

no, i truly think lando's someone special was luisa

but, lando has definitely given away his heart to people that don't deserve it

and i'm not just talking female relationships either for lando

i'm also taking about people in lando's life that have been shown his heart and then taken it for granted

i may also be referring to lando himself

lando is someone who loves to self-sabotage and think awfully of himself

so when someone tells him that he's amazing and that they don't understand why he's so hard on himself, he'll just blindly accept it

and he'll wrongly stay close to them thinking that all they want for him is happiness

when really they don't want him to succeed

they just want him because of his name and his popularity

however, at some point lando realises and he becomes more guarded

but, he also becomes more confident in who he is and becomes more trusting of himself

carlos sainz jr

feliz navidad

and no, i didn't just do this because carlos is spanish

i did it because i fully believe that carlos absolutely loves christmas cause he gets to spend the entire time with his family and loved ones

and it really seems as though carlos is a real family man and loves to be able to have the freedom to spend all the time in the world with them

no more races for the year taking him away from seeing anyone he loves

no more stress about whether or not the race strategy would either work in his favour or absolutely betray him

the only thing he had to stress about was whether or not he'd be able to hug and speak to as many people as possible

and this was because there were always so many people at the sainz christmas dinner that carlos couldn't really remember who he had spoken to and those he hadn't

i also think that when this song starts playing, carlos is singing it from the tops of his lungs

he loves being spanish so i really think he'd absolutely yell the lyrics of this song with absolutely no shame at all

i think he'd also make his famous fluffy pancake recipe the morning of christmas day for sure

i also think that carlos would be the best and most thoughtful gift-giver

like, whilst we all know that physical touch is definitely one of carlos' love languages, i also think gift-giving is another one of his love languages

especially with so many in his extended family, i do really think carlos gives the best gifts to his parents and his sisters as well as the children of his sisters

like, i bet everyone loves uncle carlos during christmas time more than they already love him

oscar piastri

where are you christmas?

okay, i know this sounds depressing but, it does make sense and gets better

because i mean in the way of the fact that if oscar wants to be home for christmas, he can't just drive five,ten, fifteen, twenty etc. minutes away to his parents house for christmas

he has to take a whole ass 20+ hour flight all the way back to melbourne

meaning he has to pack up a whole suitcase and possibly carry-on bag and plan flights to melbourne as well as return flights to england

and he also has to bring with him all of the christmas presents that he has bought for his family with him which adds so much more weight to his probably already heavy suitcase and carry-on

and then on top of all of that, he'll most likely either pick the earliest flight possible or the latest flight possible but he'll still be exhausted from the long flight and the jetlag

that when he finally arrives home in melbourne, he doesn't feel as christmassy as he used to when he didn't have to do this huge round-the-world trip just to be home with his loved ones for christmas

because he's exhausted from that long haul flight that seeing all of or lack thereof christmas decorations, christmas feels like a regular day except presents are shared with one another and there is a shit ton of food

as well as the fact that it's most likely going to be a total fire ban day and that it's going to be the literal hottest day of the entire year

meaning the day is going to be horrible because the heat is going to overwhelm everyone

oscar especially since he had gotten so used to the extreme chill of england that returning home for christmas, he forgot just how bloody hot australia gets in comparison to the heat that england experiences on the rare occasion it isn't doom and gloom over there

however, it's not all negative because i'm sure when oscar finally settles back into the rhythm of being back home in melbourne, he feels like he can finally relax

and that he can finally enjoy not having to always be on the go every single day

and that he doesn't have to really monitor how much or how little he has to eat to make sure he stays in prime shape to fit in the f1 car

he can just relax, be with his family and loved ones and eat as much food as he wants

by the end of his time in australia, christmas does manage to find oscar and he is relieved that he found it as well because he really does love the magic and simplicity of spending christmas with his family

charles leclerc

it's the most wonderful time of the year

charles leclerc is a christmas lover

he loves the magic of it

he loves the gift-giving to those he loves

especially his little niece, chiara

he loves being together with his mum pascale and his two brothers lorenzo and arthur

he just loves christmas

he really thinks that it's the most wonderful time of the year

hearing the carolers sing carols throughout monaco's main street

he just finds it absolutely beautiful at how magical christmas in monaco gets

he also loves the christmas music that gets played throughout the shops as he and everyone else frantically try to buy everything they need for christmas

he loves the christmas rush

whilst he dislikes at how late he shops for christmas presents, he turns it into a game

a game to see how much quicker than the person next to him can he find what he needs to get his two brothers for christmas

charles already getting all the presents for his mum, niece chiara and girlfriend but leaving arthur and lorenzo's present until the last possible moment because he just got so busy buying everyone else's christmas presents

however, charles does manage to get presents for his two brothers and in record time to with less than days before christmas day arrives

when it comes to the day of christmas and spending it with his family and his loved ones, the little children are immediately drawn to him

not because uncle and cousin charles is an f1 driver but because he tells the best ghost and christmas stories of the past

he tells them stories in french, italian and english of different stories of how christmas used to be celebrated in the earlier centuries

the kids listening in excitement and on the edge of their seats as charles really gets into the fantasy side of it all

he loves seeing the little kids in his family also love the magic and joy of christmas

hence why he loved to spread that same magic and joy that he had for christmas

even though he was way beyond the years of really believing in santa, who said christmas wasn't magical for the adults as well as the kids?

daniel ricciardo

aussie jingle bells

alright, i may look like i'm totally taking the piss here but, this is genuinely the song i think of when i think of daniel ricciardo + christmas

i did think about giving this song to oscar but it didn't feel right and daniel was the only other aussie f1 driver that i could totally see actually screaming out this song from the top of his lungs

daniel is a lot more hardcore aussie than oscar and jack doohan are to the point i could literally imagine him being in charge of the aux for christmas and just playing this one song by colin buchanan and greg champion on repeat

until someone tells him to cut it out or put on another christmas song

in all seriousness though, every single aussie knows this aussie twist on the classic jingle bells and it is genuinely the most honest representation of an australian christmas

it is always (majority of the time - except for that one christmas last year it was fucking freezing and raining!) a scorching hot summer's day the week leading up to and on the day of christmas

to the point that, like the song literally states, you end up in your singlet shorts and thongs (flip-flops)

but, the most false thing that is in this aussie jingle bells is the majority of us australians do not live in the bush/outback

the majority of us actually live on the coastline but, that doesn't change the fact that it's still hot as balls in australia during christmas time because in the southern hemispehre for the months of january, febuary and march, it is summertime which in the northern hemispehre it's wintertime

going back to daniel, i genuinely think that he's the one cooking up all the food on the barbecue as well as the one who hands out the drinks from the esky

i also think daniel will also be a great and thoughful gift-giver

whilst he'd definitely put a few joke gifts in there like a cheeky box of cards against humanity or a game of beer pong, i think he'd also be very thoughtful

especially in regards to his parents, i think he'd be really thoughtful and get them presents that would be very meaningful

but, going back to the beer pong game, he'd also definitely be the one that starts that game

i also feel like daniel would pull out a cheeky christmas shoey just because it was his time off from racing and he is a man of tradition

and i say doing a christmas shoey is pretty australian of him

fin

ok, this definitely came out more as a crack-fic than what it was originally meant to but i'm just glad i have another christmas fic up and done! daniel's was most definitely the one that made it into a crack fic but, i don't hate it. i think daniel represents the majority of the true blue aussies whilst oscar is the complete opposite of true blue aussie. and honestly, it's relatable because not many australians have the stereotypical bogan accent that a lot of foreigners think that we do. well, speaking for myself, i only become aware of my australian accent when i say very particular words like 'australia' and 'water' as the two that come to mind. but, anyway, i hope guys enjoyed whatever the fuck this was and merry christmas & happy holidays my lovelies <3

©⠀amberjazmyn's original work. do not translate or steal any of my fics. 2024

[eah-confessions]

i think people are too harsh on the apple and raven switched at birth theory. sure, people are not allowed to like it and i'm not against pointing out the flaws in it but i sort of think people are overly negative about it's flaws, and i hope that doesn't affect the creator. and i'm saying this as someone who doesn't agree with the theory and also heavily disagrees with it

first of all one of the takes ive seen is switched at birth would "destroy" the destiny themes of the show- to which i heavily disagree. i feel like if the writers added this revelation later on in the series if way too wonderland and dragon games didnt end the destiny arc it would point the flaws in the destiny system and change the relationship's the royals. both raven and apple's moms have one track mind and believe their destiny should be followed. it would be a massive revelation to the characters and affect their relationships. i dont think it would make all the "drama" useless considering how a lot of it stems from the culture of the fairytale world, and it would force the characters to really consider what the destiny system is. one of the biggest revelations it would be if the parents didnt know too somehow, and it was a mistake the doctors made and not intentional. (or even an ordinary citizen of bookend who was mad at the destiny system- just throwing ideas out) if the story suddenly went this way, i wouldnt like it but it doesnt feel impossible to be added to the ever after high story, given cerise and ramona's story being added late in the story or holly and poppy. i mean swapping two different babies compared to twins being born really close together is a huge reach- but still.

another thing i've seen is that because blond hair can be be recessive it disproves the theory. i understand the theory is mostly because of the hair colors of the characters not matching, but i dont really think this disprove it because it's really hard to dispute given how bare bones the theory is. many bad theories are intentionally or not intentionally difficult to disprove. i also thought, as far as i know never seeing both sets of parents even in an illustration for them is kind of suspicious to me. it would be interesting to see them focus on their family tree as well, but they didnt probably because that would kill the suspense of seeing these characters later on.

i do think this is a bad theory (its more of an idea than a theory), but an interesting story concept that could have even be considered for ever after high. i do think that its possible that this was an early idea for ever after high. consider the following: ever after high was in development for several years and wasnt even about fairytales at first, it was about witches. disney was even working on desendants as well. now part of me wonders if the reason that apple doesnt have black hair is because of disney and not wanting to make the characters too similar to disney's despite them having the well known versions of many characters. so they have to call back to the disney version (ex: adding yellow and gold in apple's design) without directly copying them. another thing that strikes me as interesting is that in one of the original versions of snow white she has "hair as black as ebony" yet in her future shown in the mirror we never see snow white in the future with the blonde turning into black hair. in fact its raven who undergoes more of a transformation. knowing how much ever after high uses the original source material of the original it's something to consider. another interesting thing to consider is the possibility if cerise was going to be more relevant this theme would make sense throughout the series, of inheriting a destiny that doesn't belong to you (i believe she was in the stop motion short) so with this i propose that it could have been considered at one point for the story, but didnt use it because it didnt work. another interesting idea is apple and raven not being switched, but being related somehow. like if the good king had a relationship with snow white but left her for evil queen and she had apple because of that. so apple and raven would be half sisters. again, not something i would want in canon but still interesting.

i know the original posters of these takes might disagree with me, but i feel like switched at birth- even though not a well carefully or thought out theory (literally just a "what if") can open up more discussions of the creative decisions on ever after high, and i feel like the community just going at this theory (as well as other communities going after theories that arent just "its not real") to me is sort of unproductive. ive seen too many takes on why it's stupid and i'm tired. i think the original creator, as far as i'm aware is a well read person who made one bad theory so when people say that it "lacks media literacy" i sort of get mad on their behalf, also hating that as a buzzword. so yeah, even though i think switched at birth is a "stupid" theory i think it's overcriticized in the fandom for being bad, when the concepts it has are really interesting outside of this theory. because the fact the ever after high designers made the child of snow white a blonde is very interesting from a design perspective because snow white is well known in many versions of her tale for having black hair. as well as the fact that ever after high was sort of mistreated by mattel and that affected the plot we were shown and how the fandom interacts with eah media. sorry if some people see this confession is just "people are too negative" but i do think people are blowing how bad this theory out of proportion. it's a bad theory with a lot of potential. i think this fandom in general has a lot of problems of overusing negative criticism and certain discussions becoming popular over others, like overfocusing on the selfishness of certain characters and whether or not apple (or raven) is a good or bad person objectively and arguing about it amongst each other instead of like... the larger actual story? i also think switched at birth would make a good AU and seeing what it would mean for their fairytales is so interesting. but not a good theory, no...

-

[kyeterna]

A conversation that never happened

I wonder what Mordei feels so guilty about

Bonus, actual in character Glow response:

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

anyway. gillions hair is the texture of green algae and he bites things and has a big fatty muscular fish tail and when he switches from breathing with his gills to breathing with his lungs he has to empty all the water out through his mouth and its really gross and hes got claws and scratches things by accident a lot and hes not a very good singer but he does it anyway and pretzel is a therapy animal and his corals will bleach if he doesnt take care of them so they start going pale if he gets sick/hurt and his skin is sort of rubbery and he eats raw fish straight from the ocean with his teeth and he is deeply deeply superstitious and sorta paranoid and on guard 101% of the time because of how he was raised and hes gullible and dumb sometimes but hes not stupid hes just out of his element

[theokusgallery]

I hate that I have reoccurring themes in everything I make. YES this guy has a complex over the fact that everyone prefers his sibling AGAIN. YES he was ostracized by his peers since he was in primary school and never knew why until years later. URGH