#most of them are series but like eh
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HiruSena ft. Philippine jeepneys (the most common method of transportation here)
CONTEXT: When jeeps are full during rush hour, it's normal to see two to four men hanging onto the back of the jeep by the railings. This shit is dangerous, because if you lose your grip while the jeep is moving, you'll get into an accident.
This is also something that both Hiruma and Sena would definitely do.
RIP HiruSena, you would have loved commuting via clinging onto jeeps like your life depends on it (and it does)
HiruSena Jeep series: (1/2)
youtube
EDIT: It has a playlist now on YouTube and Spotify!
#My most self-indulgent HiruSena stuff is when I put Hiruma and Sena in the Philippine setting#and I play with them like dolls.#Inspired by the ES21 Tagalog dub#TEAM SABIT ang mga bro na toh eh#(that translates to: These bros are “Team Hanging”)#eyeshield 21#eyeshield21#es21#yoichi hiruma#hiruma yoichi#hiruma#hiruma youichi#youichi hiruma#kobayakawa sena#hirusena#senahiru#sena kobayakawa#hirusena jeep series
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Thinking about the convolution of Eleventh Doctor's expressions of love for River Song in Season 7B. He does not trust Clara. He is utterly (wrongly) convinced that he and Clara are playing a grand manipulative game together. “What are you, eh?! A trick? A trap?!!”
So naturally, the last thing he should do in this game is to clue his opponent in on something that could be used to hurt him. Something like River, so painfully near the end of their time together, whose data ghost he can always see, who “it would hurt too much” to acknowledge. He can't let Clara know of the loss which constantly floods his senses; (“You are always here to me. And I always listen, and I can always see you,” he professes, once Clara has vanished into his timestream).
And yet. River fills his every moment (irregardless of any sneaking out for dates with increasingly-young Rivers while Clara is asleep like he did while the Ponds slept, which would explain his absence when the TARDIS is hiding Clara's bedroom). Even though it's not strategic, he can’t help but tell Clara about her. The best defense he can manage is to phrase it as if River isn’t as important to him as she is. Not only is avoiding her first name in his grief; he's also completely avoiding pronouns; which seems extreme given that he's still mentioning her as often as: “Oh yeah, of course he has! Professor Song! Sorry, it's just I never realized you were a woman.”
Leave out the emotion — leave out the details — don't show the cracks in the armor — play the part — win the game.
“Well, there's no point now. We're about to die. JUST TELL ME WHO YOU ARE.”
#I mean we KNOW that the doctor immediately started pouring his hearts out to Clara as soon as NotD ended <3#Clara tells the war doctor “he's always talking about the day he did it” okay so he's always talking about it starting after the prev ep#eleventh doctor#river song#clara oswald#words by seaweed#yeah I know the implication in Name of the Doctor is that eleven is two-timing them / worried abt Clara being jealous. which. eh. maybe.#but I like this better. also both things can be true if we want them to be#eleven is in SUCH a bad way in Season 7B too he needs to be held#“I thought it would hurt too much and I was right” ever think about how Clara was there for in the deepest moments of his grief?#whether his sad victorian cloud… on the Last Day… or on the day he was finally able to say Rivers name. he thought it would hurt too much#Tia made a really insightful post recently about how eleven can’t speak rivers name when she's gone and like. god. yeah.#it also made me think about. who would he even talk to River about? if he could? after years on a cloud drowning in her present nonpresence#ever think how if HoRS had happened before Hell Bent he never could've dealt with it and coulda broke the universe for River instead#Series 9 was a continuation/escelation of eleven's (and next twelve's) “he hates endings” - endings for Amy and Rory. for River. for Clara.#he hit rock bottom. and then Clara saved him#“You said memories become stories when we forget them. Maybe some of them become Songs.”#thank you Clara <3#one episode later:#“When the wind stands fair and the night is perfect when you least expect it but always when you need it the most- there is a Song.”#bc this is NOT to undervalue the Doctor's love for Clara he has a Duty of Care she's more Breakable than him (also than river!)#but it can it really be a coincidence? bc he is talking abt river in the second one. unless Moffat is obsessed with Song imagery? I MEAN
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do you ship helena bertinelli with anyone? if yes, then which characters and why? what's your favorite helena ship? do you have any helena rarepairs? (i know you've talked about helena/steph and you're so right about it, it's a very interesting ship)
!!!! i have so many ships for my best girl ever yes oh my god thank you for asking.
my top pairing is probably Vic Sage/the Question. Vic is the basic answer, but man. i love them so much. no couple has matched each other's freak like that have. Justice League Unlimited is a great adaptation of Helena in general, but it also did a great adaptation of Helena and Vic's relationship. how he just dedicates himself to helping her with no expected return, but also wants to make sure she doesn't go too far in a hunt for vengeance that never ends for her. i think a lot of characters often want to change Helena or expect things out of her for their own needs, like the Batfam and the BoP. but Vic is one of the few people who just wants her to be better for her own good. when he tries to stop her from killing it's not because of his morals, it's because he doesn't want this crusade to consume her. and i just. man i think about them a lot. Helena rlly likes weird little men who give themselves wholly to her.
Zinda Blake/Lady Blackhawk is also a top ship for me. tbh i just like Zinda. but i do love how Helena and Zinda interact, being the more rough and tumble members of the BoP. they're both outsiders, in different ways. Helena is an outsider of the Batfam and Zinda is literally from a different time and an outsider to the current world. their friendship is so genuine and i think if Babs and Dinah can have. whatever homoerotic nonsense going on during BoP, then Zinda and Helena deserve some homoerotic nonsense too. as a treat.
if we're willing to count New-52 Helena, then i enjoy Helena/Dick/Tiger. i think Helena and Dick being a past relationship is really important in pre-Flashpoint for Helena's development, though i don't ship them as a serious couple beyond a fling. but in the New-52, i think this throuple be fun. Helena and Tiger respect each other as two very driven, no-nonsense agents and then well. they both clearly have some kind of thing for Dick. so it's fun finding the balance of how they could all work together romantically.
and ofc. it's a crime to mention Helena ships and not mention Renee Montoya/the Question. every time they interact it's really fucking gay. it's so gay that Kate Kane, Renee's own ex, assumed Helena and Renee were gay. i cannot be convinced against this ship. i genuinely think this ship should be canon. i mean. DC did tease us with this moment from an alternate universe and it's lived rent for me since. fucking criminal for us to only get one panel of what we could have if DC let Helena be a fruit in the main universe. being in love with Helena Bertinelli should be a right of passage for the Question mantle, i personally believe. if you asked me like. genuinely who i want to see Helena date in the current comics, Renee is my top pick. (i would say Vic but he's fucking dead and the New-52 butchered him so rip my mans-)
lois lane (2019) #10
besides those ships, just about every ship for Helena probably falls into the category of rarepair. like you said i've talked about my love for Helena/Steph before bc god. i think it should be a thing more people ship. once i finish the fic i'm writing about them i will convince others to like it.
i also think Helena/Cass could be fun. in a *lot* of ways Helena and Cass are narrative parallels to each other. Helena was a victim of her family being murdered at about the same age Cass was forced to be a murderer. Helena grows up to believe in lethal justice because of this, and Cass grows up to be staunchly against it. Cass' Batgirl suit was made *by* Helena. they both want to be protectors of the most vulnerable people. they balance each other out in a lot of ways and i think they should kiss about it.
also probably a rarepair, i think Helena/Lady Shiva is fun. their fight during Birds of Prey (2010) had... questionable moments for Helena's characterization, but i do love so much that Helena knocks Shiva off her feet and gains a deep respect from Shiva. like. Shiva gives her a nickname and shows her admiration. i would like to see fanfic where Shiva continues to be weirdly admirable of Helena and bothering her non-stop. they could be a fun fucked up toxic yuri moment. this is just. so gay to me.
birds of prey (2010) #6
my most rare Helena pair would probably be Helena Wayne, actually. but specifically Helena Wayne of JSA (2022). ever since, for some reason, it was made canon that the current Helena Wayne was named after Helena Bertinelli and took the name Huntress to honor her i *cannot* stop thinking about them meeting. because in-universe it makes *no* fucking sense for Bruce to name his kid after *Helena Bertinelli*, someone he's regularly at odds with and doesn't like. it's clearly an awkward explanation to try to make the whole two Huntress situation make sense. (it's almost as bad as Helena Wayne in the New-52 using Helena Bertinelli as an alias.) but because it's such an odd choice, i do think it could be fun for Helena Wayne, when she's back in time to see Bruce, to find Helena Bertinelli to get to know the woman she was named after and Helena Bertinelli just being. baffled by the idea of *Batman* naming his kid after her. it could be a fun fucked up moment.
my other super rarepair is Kara Zor-L/Power Girl. they had like. one meaningful interaction of JSA Classified and it's been PLAGUING me. something about when Power Girl doesn't remember her past and she's seeking a friend, she instinctively goes to find Huntress? but it's wrong bc this isn't *her* Huntress and neither of them understand why Power Girl would seek Helena out? god it's so good. i'm always a big fan of ships where one person in the ship is *so* obviously using the other person as a replacement for someone they lost and they both know it. it's such a doomed angsty thing where you could play with Helena actually really liking Kara, but knowing that she's just a replacement for Kara's Helena Wayne. good fucked up shit man.
and lastly: i really ship her with Dawn Granger/Dove. there's no canon basis for this, they didn't have a ton of interactions even when they were both on the BoP. but there's a very kind innocence to Dawn that contrasts Helena's violence really well. and i do love a ship with a corruption kink vibe to it. let Helena corrupt Dawn. i could write such fucked up porn about these two.
#necrotic answerings#helena bertinelli#idk the ship names for most of these ships so idk how to tag them#most of them are too rare to have ship names. tragic.#anyway i ship her with so many ppl#i do ship her with tim as well but i didn't mention him just bc i default to viewing them platonically.#also think babs is a valid ship for her. but in a hatefucking way.#i prefer their relationship when they can't stand each other it's more fun.#but yeah the realistic “i want to see this in canon” options are vic and renee#and then the rest are “i'm alone in this ship but i see potential” rarepairs#esp lady shiva. like i'm *really* tempted to write that fic.#i just need to read more comics with shiva.#actually the most fucked up option: cass/helena/shiva incestual threesome.#that has potential. but i don't think anyone shares my vision#also i've seen posts arguing for helena/jason#and while. longterm i disagree. i do think them sleeping together is on the table.#but largely ppl always bringing him up when talking about her sours me to that ship. so eh.#also i would ship helena/bruce in a fucked up way if that one batman: the brave & the bold episode didn't piss me off so bad#justice league unlimited is the *only* good adaptation of helena i'm so serious.#everything else eats ass with her. esp the arrowverse.#and the birds of prey movie.#but jlu does good by her and if you just watch that show you do have a solid grasp of her character#it adapts her story into a child-friendly medium in what i think is the best way it could've#anywhore thank you for this ask <3#you actually sent this when something rlly shitty happened so it was a nice little distraction from life to think about my answer#OH WAIT YOU KNOW WHO I FORGOT.#kate spencer. manhunter. I ship her with helena too.#lethal female vigilantes unite.#BRO those two deserve a teamup mini or something. they'd click so well.#dc hire me to write a huntress/manhunter mini series i promise i won't make them gay (my fingers are crossed)
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Battle Network being the only MM series that I didn’t get deeply invested into that I still haven’t played most of the games is so funny despite this year basically being it’s year of relevancy again because I do know facts off handily about it and one of the things that jumpscares me every time I remember it is something that wasn’t even in the games: It’s the fucking fact in the anime they said “let’s make this a Tokusatsu” in like the fourth game arc onward and this will never not throw me off despite being the mf who’s favorite mm series is literally ZX.
#meg text#mega man#mega man battle network#mega man exe#The funniest part is I never bothered to watch the anime but I still know this knowledge#I was that person who absorbed most/all mega man knowledge and got confused when others admitted they didn’t know Jack about BN#despite not even caring for it I was just like “how did you not get it shoved in your face#I still don’t know why this series doesn’t tickle my brain at all though#like I say classic and x are overrated-not in a dickish way tho-but there’s stuff I like in them#just not stuff to consider my favorite but still enjoy#BN I’m like “you seem neat ig” and don’t care further#but also I enjoyed starforce??? I’m weird#I appreciate just the fact the anime was cracked as shit even if I probably won’t watch with my attention span#also it’s not the perfect adaptation even if it expanded some stuff they also ruin things kinda#but I’ll take eh adaption to watch a few eps of then whatever the fuck happened with sf anime#also I’m happy BNLC did well but if we get bn7 I will sob because o know how the series ends and we DONTNEEDIT#I’m rambling in tags but my mega man autism activated
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OC-tober day 15 prompt: meme
Featuring K.A., Kali, Adam, Kaylyn and Eri from Universe Building Tutorial (first just one of those draw your ocs prompts and then just normal meme edits)
Sixteen teenagers are tasked with the creation of a universe, problem is three of them are control freaks and half of the others don't get along well. Plus there is no tutorial out there for how to achieve such a thing. Who let a bunch of teens handle such an important task-
For this prompt I only chose five of the characters. The afformentioned control freaks are K.A. and Kali (Denis is not present here), while the other 3 are chosen because: Adam is K.A.'s unfortunate guyfailure punching bag, Kaylyn (gay intent), and I really really love Eri's design (plus despite her overall foul behaviour she s one of the few people that can get along with K.A. so i thought it would make sense for her to be here)
I could go on for days for the complicated dynamics between all sixteen members of the cast but this is not the relationship prompt entry.
From bweirdart's OC-tober prompt:
While I am doing this challenge mostly to keep an archive of my characters on tumblr (and to incentivise myself to draw them), if you, person stumbling upon this post, are curious and wanna learn more, my askbox is open >:3c
#oc-tober#bweirdOCtober#kyeterna oc#Universe Building Tutorial#unibtut: K.A.#unibtut: Kali#unibtut: Adam#unibtut: Kaylyn#unibtut: Eri#they dont know these used to be au ocs........#not telling what series tho ehe#unlike most of my other stories I will not be publishing anything about this one#it serves more of a purpose in the meta story if anything#i do like outting them in situations though#they are like little dolls i play with heeheh#K.A. Kali and Denis are all horrible horrible people. Then again teenagers- they are all scary#I love them nonetheless though I love you my dysfunctional little kids#Adam deserves better treatment tho
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why did u dislike stand by me? other than the art style
While you said aside from art style, I'll say it's worse than I thought it'd be. I hate when the characters open their terrible no tooth mouths, they do it so much it's hard to ignore and it's awful to look at. Aside from the uncanny factor though, the backgrounds and scenery look nice.
As for the movie itself, I feel like it just highlights everything I don't really like about the Doraemon series? From the Nobita and Shizuka """romance""", to the weird perverted jokes at Shizuka's expense. I'm also in general not a fan of the 'Doraemon leaves/April Fools' story they used at the end, so I wasn't happy to see it again and in a movie I could care less about.
It doesn't feel like anything changes or progresses, it doesn't make me believe Nobita ever grows to be his own person that can take care of himself, that they don't set anything up for any of the payoff it gives...
They throw in some dialogue about Nobita being depressed, they use sad lighting, and they use tears but they never are actually saying anything meaningful. It just feels like tools to cheat you into feeling sad but it really had the opposite effect on me, I just felt annoyed because the emotional moments do not feel earned.
When Nobita drinks the juice that makes people hate him and Shizuka fights against it to comfort him, that should be a moment that moves you... a triumph and instead I just sit there and don't feel very moved because it didn't feel like there was any progression in their relationship to earn this? Like the idea I like, it's sweet inherently but it doesn't play out in a way that makes me engaged in the story.
Everyone takes a backseat for Nobita's obsession with Shizuka which I think, is the worst thing you could make the focus. I know it's an important part of the plot but I've never liked it, I've already discussed how Shizuka doesn't feel like her own person but just a prize to be won by Nobita in the end... when movies, episodes, etc focus on it so much- it makes me believe in their relationship less and less.
I'm sorry but putting her in a weird outfit for your benefit, trying to force her to fall in love with you via imprinting, up-skirting her in public.... it doesn't make me root for him. Those things in the series have done the opposite of make me root for them, especially contrasted with how Dekisugi treats her. It makes me wonder why on earth she'd pick Nobita in any universe, but specifically this one?
Also something, something... how marrying Jaiko was not the issue and Nobita's misery is his own fault, but yeah sure let's focus on what wife this ten year old gets in the future.
It's especially horrible hearing her say, during the blizzard in the cave, "You need someone to take care of you." As a reason to marry Nobita, as a reason to say yes to the proposal... SHE'S TOO GOOD FOR HIM IN THIS MOVIE! Sorry to say. That is not a wife, that's a mother- it's not love it just feels like pity.
Nobita needs to learn some actual self love and not betting all his happiness on a marriage years from now. Putting all his points into one person for some distant goal is a bad idea, what about the now? What about building bonds with his friends, his family? What about fixing himself as he is now.
I get the point is that somehow earning Shizuka's love will help him, make him a better person, but it doesn't feel like it. It also just feels.... not good. I would talk about the reliance on gadgets instead of self help in any way, but that's always been a thing.
Anyhow, it's a movie that exists for people who are already a fan of the franchise to trick you into thinking it's emotional because your knowledge and feel for the characters already give you depth for them. It feels like it's trying to get cheap and easy tears out of you and I don't really care for that.
It's also a whirlwind of stories I already know, done a bit worse for some in a bad art style. It was doomed to be a movie I don't like. I just can't think of anything positive I felt from it that I couldn't get better in any other Doraemon movie, chapter or even episode.
#doraemon talk#its not even just about how suneo and gian are barely in the movie and how i feel about their contributions#its that the important central focuses of the plot- shizuka doraemon and nobita all just bother me and i cant enjoy it#i didnt even feel a reason for doraemon and nobitas bond in this bc all the moments just blow right on by its just like okay i mean#i can easily imagine why bc i KNOW the series but it doesnt make for a very good movie ykno?#but the shizuka stuff is what gets me down the most its the pinnacle of what i tend to hate about the series sometimes#and it sucks i was rly hoping i could find anything in this movie i like but i didnt#at the very least i appreciate some bits with suneo and gian but thats more so out of them being my faves then liking the movie#nobita feels so bad abt himself its almost suicidal is like... i could relate if it didnt feel so forced in? just a cheap tearjerker#like not saying that isnt interesting IT COULD BE this movie COULD BE good but it feels so... eh#anyways for my final thoughts adult suneos design is bad also bc it doesnt even feel like him and not just bc of the hair#its in his outfit and energy that isnt my boy...#annnnnd young jaiko looks like carl wheezer that isnt a downside i just laughed a rly long time with the friend i watched this with#when they pointed it out to me
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Fact about me that will only be understood and potentially found amusing by a niche amount of people: oddly, the first Vocaloid project I found myself getting into was Shuuen no Shiori and then Kagerou Project. I clicked on a Kagerou Days thumbnail thinking it was a PART of Shuuen no Shiori, lol.
#dee p thoughts#music series#shuuen no shiori#kagerou project#vocaloid#I find myself curious and wanting to dig into more series but ah...Ill have to go out of my way and look into it sometime lol#these projects are music first story second at the end of the day when youve consumed enough you gotta realize none of these will be#particularly stellar at the very least you can wish them to be barely comprehensible but even then lololol#ironically I dont know if this would be a hot take but I think shuuen no shiori IS more comprehensible and tangible in meaning than kagerou#project adlkjbnadfkjn- hey shout out to my mikagura school suite fans what was that lol#admittedly theres some shorter ''series'' nowadays that are more solid but Im not sure if Id call them series and/or theyre intended to be#as opposed to just...songs that are connected to each other with a storyline. my distinctor is that theyre very brief#like nilfruits with shama kilmaa and aranjando(sp?) theyre very solid but Im not sure if theyre an intended SERIES its only 3 songs#theres also the color series from hiiragi kirai but I...theres something going on there but its very vague not sure if they seriously want#to do anything with that ajdlknbfdakljn#and then yuri kuriyama with neurosis ope and vital sign ah...#I feel like projects are technically still here but also at the same time not its very interesting haha#theres also milgram but admittedly my feelings towards it are kind of. *shrugs* eh#anyways reader if you wanted another series to get into I recommend alien stage its the most solid series Ive been into imo and its a#current running one!!! I REALLY LIKE IT AHHH#I FORGOT ABOUT ROYAL SCANDAL UWAGHHH I enjoy that one too lol
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About that misogyny in fandom post. I think it’s like… a complicated enough net of “what people want to see in fan creations”, “what people can relate to in fan creations”, “what kind of people make up for most of the creative side of fandom” (remember that “all men do in fandom is make power level tiers and theories” post? It’s bad but like. Shows the general sentiment), “what will give an author interactions”, and “how do people approach each other about their favourite things”. Like there are many factors, and I think sexualisation and fanservice should be counted in too, and the diversity offered to male vs female characters. I’ve said it once before but it’s generally much harder to find a female character who has the same freedom of expression as a male character. And a lot of them are not made with the same enthusiasm as the male ones. Like yeah, that is misogyny but I think it’s not like. A fandom-root problem but a source material problem too? And imo the audience will subconsciously or not react to that.
Plus, maybe this wouldn’t be so visible if fandom wasn’t mostly ship-centric… Because as it stands, even if there is a voice to explore non-romantic and sexual relationships oftentimes it just ends up being a very sad/isolating experience still. Hmm
#d0 stuff#rising my ‘can I have a over powered non-male lead in an actions series’ flag again#like even looking at sth as small as action or isekai it’s Impossible to find that thing I’ve been looking for#it’s sad and revolting#but like. this is not about the fans. it’s about the creators also (mostly?)#like idk. I can be frustrated but I wouldn’t blame the people for not being enthusiastic about sth that the creators didn’t care enough ab#eh#like I get it it was a post that probably wasn’t meant to breach containment but you know#it always irks me when people thing it’s only one factor at play#and not to mention gender#and the romance centric thing#yeah okay I will leave this dog alone#but as people said#no amount of telling people to enjoy female characters more will make them do it#the shift most probably has to come from the source material
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so funny to end growing up as the character guy with no social awareness or storytelling skills. yes this is my guy, he has no backstory because he represents a vague collection of traits i cant put into words and he also never changes and was just born like this. sorry
#ive said before that i personally cant connect with other pplscharacters that just have no bits of context to go off of like bios traits etc#but i also cant manage to come up with any of my own either#for bios like idk it feels just plain to write a backstory when it could be drawn in a comic or whatever. its boring to just read#and even if i try most of my characters are just sonas which ends up becoming rather redundant bc they share so many traits#and characters that arent sonas then end up facing my lack of knowledge to flesh them out enough for me to attach to them#like i literally havent met enough people to have a wide selection of points of view to apply to characters#and i dont watch any like series or anything ever to have a good basis of other characters to learn and draw inspo from#the impending doom of making my character directory approaches...#dextxt#eh... maybe im forcing myself to think of chars as these immutable boxes instead of just having fun but i dont really know#to me if a character has no story then theyre justa design. just an idea of a guy. when has an idea of someone ever been like the real thin
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one day i might want to make a master post with all of my AO3-user tips because (and this is a toxic trait of mine ik) i get REALLY irritated with a lot of ‘advice’ posts that just repeat the same basic information in a patronizing way without offering like... actually specific input.
and i think ao3 as a whole is a relatively easy site to use you just gotta get the hang of it. in a sense i would really liken it to tumblr because one of the things about tumblr is that you can’t just join the site and then hit an explore page directly, that’s not really how this place works, you usually have to populate your dash with blogs. with ao3 it is significantly harder to just search up ships and works imo, it’s best if you already have favorite tags and how you do that is finding specific fics and then going from there and exploring in a branch off method. so once you use it for a while it’s extremely comfortable and remarkably convenient it’s just not really the easiest from the get go.
#nightmare.personal#i think a LOT of people talk about like. don't over tag. but idk do people know when they should and shouldn't overtag?#that's a specific thing i think about because. i mean TLDR i think when it comes to characters and ships#you tag them if by removing them from the fic you would lose a substantial portion of the fic's content#like a fleeting mention to a background character eh you don't need that#but if a background character is not directly pictured but is repeatedly referenced then yes i do say you tag that#though you can note them as being mentioned and i think that's a tag that filters into their main so#just helpful as an indicator#also as i was saying earlier you can tag pretty broadly#bc ngl there are a Lot of Really Specific Tags on ao3 but they honestly lack a LOT of tags that i at least commonly use#derealization and dissociation iirc aren't formal tags there so i kind of do my best to tag that anyway and then#clarify in the beginner's notes. notes are SO useful#i think when you approach something like a series of drabbles in one fic that gets a little more difficult to explain but#i think you can find a way to manage that too#it would just mean only tagging the most critical components of the fic or things that are sweepingly occurring#so like a several chapter dump of drabbles might warrant a whump tag if like 4/10 are whump centric#but if like 1 character appears in the background of only 2 of them i wouldn't say tag that#also having a table of contents chapter or very descriptive (non artsy) chapter titles + beginner's note is super helpful
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guess who just bought several new games on steam >:3
#🌙.rambles#i don't usually buy stuff for myself by my own#TURNS OUT A RELATIVE GAVE ME N APOLLO MONEY SO i used some on several games ehe ><#thought i might as welll get both projectmoon games! n several games from the developer of to the moon (including said game as well)#i bought crisis core reunion w my own money yesterday T_T#yk though. hopefully my dad n my aunt can play sometime. how idk when my ps4's just in my room like this BUT#i don't know much abt their childhood in depth but#one aspect of it that ik of is that they grew up w a lot of video games hehe#thinking abt it n ngl they influenced me a Lot. final fantasy is my fav series n. they started my interest#i'm so sleepy it's just 12 smth but i've been sleepy for hours i said i'll finish my part in the final paper by earlier today aaaa#but i ended up playing ffxiv for most of the day ! been playing just like the old days. i missed it so much#doing roulettes n dailies n leveling classes. doing quests here n then. fixing my inventory bcs it's full.#n afking a bunch but also talking w friends n then helping ppl out in pf. i miss raiding so much#playing earlier with stuff in pf reminded me of two things. that i genuinely am good at the game n that#i REALLY miss raiding. savage n ultimates.. heck even extremes i just really miss playing more difficult content in ffxiv#i miss learning fights w other players. i miss the stress to an extent. n the relief n. the pride in mastering mechanics#the thrill in. hdlfajsdlkf when i'd clutch smth n then the way my heart warms when like#i miss vcing w the old statics i had n. their voices hehe. from europe n oceania. different accents#i miss how. even though i'd be too shy to unmute or even rlly talk a lot. i was a part of them. i belonged.#back in twintania it was.. especially like a second home. n ever since endwalker i'll be honest it hasn't been quite the same but#it's still the same game. i miss when i cld spend more time w my friends then but i'm rlly happy now in ffxiv at least that#slowly i'm having that again. i want to also like. goddamn i rlly love helping others. seeing them improve n reach greater heights#rlly just makes me so happy. genuinely. someday someday we'll do ultimates together! ><#someday far away but surely i know one day. n when that day comes. i won't hesitate anymore.#i ended up rambling i'm so sleepy i'll just play more tmrrw i think. or i dunno. I'M SO SLEEPY WTF..#the year n the break ends so soon i'm gna have to start studying for cets like next week alrdy :<#i'm excited honestly to review stuff for science bcs i'm genuinely really fond of learning. but ugh i love learning but i hate school#i have so much games to play but there's not enough time! i will fix stuff asap. maybe. idk making plans while i'm sleepy is No#i rlly want an animated background for my steam profile but i do not have enough points yet T_T oh if you check it out tho pls#do not judge the games i'll cry pls don't judge me :c anyways. good day tho today was a good day c:
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Can confirm being part of several problematic fandoms Changed Me for the better
i recommend being a fan of 1 problematic piece of media at least once in your life
#I’m not sure I can put into words exactly what parts of me have changed but I definitely have#in case y’all are curious what those fandoms are:#(in sort of order by least problematic to most)#(I’m rating this based on fandom AND the actual media btw)#sanders sides (so must selfcest omg but overall not bad)#bnha (canon is okay ish but the creator is ehh and the loudest part of the fandom is blegh)#persona (I love the canon dearly by YIKES THE FANDOM - tumblr and ao3 are chill tho)#Harry Potter (I say it’s even with persona cause the fandom is chill but BY THE FUCKING GODS JKR IS A DICK)#and finally - Shadowhunters (no not my tragic past - canon is eh quality with countless questionable things yes there’s rep but it ain’t go-#good; EW THE MALEC AGE GAP WHYD I EVER SHIP IT; autism rep is eh in the sequel series; infernal devices is pretty good; Cassie Claire is#a really werid person like wow her past in the HP fandom is SO WEIRD#she was besties with ms scribe and wrote Ron/ginny fanfic while condemning Harry/ginny for being problematic like WTF girl#and the fandom is just weird too like not to be a ship elitist cause I used to be one of them but why are they shipping some of this#speaking of Cassie Claire’s sordid past why is there so much incest plot lines in this series#anyway I’ve ranted about shadowhunters enough but I AM SCARRED FOR LIKE FROM THAT SHIT)#maybe my ranking of these is biased but hey what’s middle school for if not getting into questionable fandoms#(I say; as if most of these aren’t from after middle school)#also I’m not counting fandoms I’m only in sorta tangentially#like yeah I read Danny phantom/dc crossovers but I don’t give a shit out DP on its own#so yeah it’s a questionable fandom cause the creator is a dick but it doesn’t count for the list
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i'm kinda upset that Dragon age veilguard doesn't even import world states so I think I'll save up for Baldur's gate 3 instead
#i could probably look past everything i don't really vibe with in regards to the game#but the fact they don't import all the silly little choices from THREE games is kind of a gut punch#i dont CARE they didn't really matter!!!#they mattered to me!!!#and i thought they mattered to the game too ://////#so now i'm kinda like... eh#i'm interested in *my* dragon age world#not a cookie cutter fantasy world#i know realistically most the choices wouldn't even matter but they could have.... we waited for 10 years....... they really could have#i think#and the fact I'm more keen to start a new franchise that seems to represent OG Dragon age better#than i am to play the sequel to a beloved series i sunk DAYS into just to romance the different companions.... kind of a bummer#also my ass didn't spend hours in DAO save editor and the keep and finetuning my PERFECT world state only for them to go uhhh no thanks#anyway#vent
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Have to say I didn’t feel episode 1 but that might be my mood and the eps functionality coming first
#but eh#but then I think most first eps are always a bit weak#Rose was amazing bc of Rose#but for instance the series 2 opener with the cat nuns I also#always just found ok#s3 is probably my favourite opener bc ann Reid with a straw plus Martha#s4 I wouldn’t count for arbitrary reasons#s5 was meh#s6 s7 I don’t recall#s8 was like. ok too#they’re always just ok no matter who writes them#and who’s the doctor#so it depends on Ep 2 for#me#which I won’t watch before Wednesday
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it was a cruel twist of fate that everything i actually wanted and all my personal growth flashed before my eyes as soon as i ended up in the biggest mental and physical crisis of my life that has slowly eaten away at my will to live and aged me like crazy but at least it gives me (this is a metaphor and not literal***) watanuki kinnie points
#ehe#no but like ITS KINDA FUNNY THO#the funniest part is i got more and more mixed on the og holic manga ending the more and more i went through mental health crises#and various inabilities to feel like i can see friends without feeling scared or battles with loneliness or all that depressing stuff#like as a teenager i found suffering and tragedy in stories a lot more mature and beautiful than i do now#smth abt going through suicidal periods and massive mental issues that makes the holic ending look less and less beautiful and mature etc#i mean theres beauty in it and most of my fav series are DEEPLY TRAGIC AND COMPLICATED but also fuck this let them be happy#holic especially just feels so fuckin wild cause on the one hand its rly fucking poetic as a cautionary tale but#also its like ...for a series deeply centered on personal growth and depression....to contradict its own thesis statement...#i think part of my mixed feelings is rei cause the fetch quest dream world sike actually made me angry#plus it felt kinda like ...oh no choice is the wrong choice freedom of choice good (peer pressures him into making the 'right' choice)#tfw the hand monster is THE COOLEST SHIT imaginable but what it represents kinda soured me on rei lol#anyway when Rei continues ill keep up with it but my eyes are SIDE EYEING it real bad#sometimes i think abt how the ovas further clarified various shit the anime chose not to#they said no clamp not everything is improved by teacher student forbidden romance ambiguity theyre not actually into each other#stamped that ambiguity out right away#i forgot where i was going w this#anyway angst is good but sometimes anime characters should have nice things#i have no idea where this train of thought came from#i used to be too anxious to go too hard on likkng holic cause nobody cared and i worried i was being too cringe#at least in my sick person with no life era one of my big realisations was that that was dumb and i like it way more than i let on#cringe is dead and doumeki is not in my brain because i said so
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my review of serial experiments lain episode 1
hello everybody i just finished watching serial experiments lain episode 1 and wanted to write a review. okay i'm going to start with a plot synopsis so far:
plot synopsis:
the episode starts on a group of scientists all looking at each other in a circle. and one of them says "we have to do experiments on Lain.....in a series" and Lain happens to be passing by right at that moment.
and so another scientist is like "THERE SHE IS, FUCKING GET HER!!!" and they all start chasing after her and she starts running away. most of the episode is a chase sequence with the scientists trying to do the serial experiments and Lain.
at one point there are 2 workers carrying a big glass pane (or, implied to be, as it is totally see-through) and Lain runs right through it somehow but the scientists crash into it. i thought that was silly and liked it.
also at one point the scientists are all running together and they realize there's 1 more of them than there was before, and turns out it's Lain disguised in a labcoat and fake glasses/nose/mustache combo, and she goes "ehe" and does a big bead of sweat as her fake glasses/nose/mustache combo slips a bit. then she zooms away, leaving the labcoat and the fake glasses/nose/mustache combo hanging in the air.
finally, they catch her by throwing a brick at her head
review:
i can see why this is a well regarded series. the gags are good, and i'm left wondering who the scientists are and why they want to do serial experiments on Lain. And I'm also left wondering what the experiments will be and who Lain is. i'm wondering a lot of things and that is a sign of a good series.
i so far give it a 7/10 but will adjust the score based on how funny the experiments are
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update:
the first experiment is they are making her run a ninja warrior style obstacle course. she has having trouble with the part where you gotta hang on to a swinging punching bag type thing, and keeps falling into the slime. i think i would do better on that part as i have greater upper body strength than a middle school girl
update 2:
they are seeing what the biggest animal is that Lain could beat in a fight
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