#moreid domestic fluff

[cyn-00]

This is called "it's 8am and I've been awake since 5 and this idea popped into my head but it's not plot-ful enough to write an actual fic out if it"

Or: Moreid fluffy/snuggly/sleepy conversation about Boyband Hair™ bc we were robbed. This is a tribute to it. Vaguely inspired by 5x22 "The internet is forever", when indeed Hotch makes his iconic comment about Reid's haircut. EDIT: I decided in the end to post it on my AO3 too bc 1) I like the idea of having a platform where to keep all my works organized and 2) if u ever wanna re-read it it's easier to find :3

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Morgan's hand sneaked up to settle in his boyfriend's hair, a gesture that had become second nature to the man as much as responding to it with a content purr had become second nature to the genius.

He chuckled fondly and squeezed Spencer's weary frame even more into his arms, shifting to get more comfortable in their lying position on the Doctor's couch.

He relished in their first actual few minutes of real quiet after having managed to wrap up yet another loud, messy, challenging case; tenderly scraping the man's scalp with his fingertips.

When Spencer had popped up in the conference room that morning along with that new haircut of his, Derek's instant reaction had been a seemingly uncontainable jaw drop at the very least, if not a flat out hopefully-not-drooling-on-the-floor kind of situation. Right off the bat he hadn't thought about how he would no longer be able to braid his hair and twirl his fingers around the curls and see the genius sigh annoyedly and give in to pulling it up in a messy half-bun. He didn't mind anyway though. Spencer was gorgeous, how dare he complain.

"So uh...boyband? " he teased.

Reid's giggle came in a hitched puff of warm air tickling the man's throat.

"Stop." he attempted at biting back. It came off adorable, just as expected. Which usually made him even more flustered which in turn made him even more adorable. A virtuous cycle, if you will, to Morgan's eyes - Boy Wonder would disagree.

"Mmh I don't know baby it doesn't really fit you, if you ask me..." Derek joked further, chasing that very virtuous cycle that every time made his heart swell with reverence and disarming affection for the boy snuggled in his arms.

Spencer playfully kicked his calf with a stripy sock-cladded foot. "I said stop!"

The man's chest only thrummed more eagerly with chuckles at the reaction, as he gave in the impulse to tilt his head down and place a kiss on his boy's forehead, covered in a layer of soft hazelnut bangs he wasn't used to.

"C'mon. You know I'm joking." he reassured; Spencer raised his face - until then tucked under his chin - to meet Derek's kind eyes the second the man dropped that little game of his.

"I know." Reid nodded his understanding, the corner of his lips quirking up in a small grin. "And anyway, doesn't sound to me like an insult or anything." he shrugged.

The other's brows shot up. "You got that one right."

Derek cradled the genius' cheek with a hand, preventing him from shying away from what he was going to say. "You do look extremely pretty."

A glimmer sparked up in Spencer's eyes at the compliment, biting his inner-cheek but determined to not avert his gaze.

"...thank you" he replied bashfully; seemingly impossible for the wholesome genius to be unpolite even if there's no need to thank someone for merely speaking the truth.

After keeping up with the man's stare a while longer, Spencer's muzzle couldn't help but reclaim his previous warm spot under Derek's chin.

He laid a velvet peck on his boyfriend's Adam's apple. "That's all that matters to me, honestly."

Morgan frowned. Boy had this habit of voicing his thoughts minutes if not hours after the conversation had come to its end.

"What matters, kid?"

"...that...that you think that of me ?"

Derek ducked his head to bury his lips in Spencer's cloud of brunette strands.

"That I think you're pretty? That what you're saying?" he asked; questions coming out in a half-mumble due to the dampening effect of the genius' mop of hair.

"Yeah." the other simply confirmed, tying his arms tighter around the older man's torso.

"I- I mean... I'm not saying that I cut my hair for you, I mean that at the end of the day I just care that YOU think I'm...pretty."

Derek's already molten heart leaked out of his body. "Spencer... you are my Pretty Boy. Always. Got that?"

To someone external it might've seemed shallow to spend time discussing about whether Morgan thought he was pretty or not. To the couple it wasn't, though, because that last exchange of theirs held a bigger, unspoken value to it, unanimously acknowledged by them both. Claiming Reid was his pretty boy was only the very tip of the iceberg of a meaning way deeper, hinted at through a light-hearted, sleepy conversation.

If Derek hadn't known the man like the palm of his hand, he wouldn't have been willing to bet that he was smiling ear-to-ear. But he did know him like the palm of his hand, and he could also feel that smile hovering millimeters away from his skin.

Spencer nodded vehemently. "Got it. Your Pretty Boy."

[spencers-renaissance]

this heavy humanness

Summary: Spencer leaves the oven on overnight, and Derek - whose pent-up emotions get the best of him - loses it, exposing secrets neither of them expected to be spilled, for two very different reasons. They get there in the end.

or; Spencer's suffered far too much abuse in his life and Derek knew about none of it. He shouldn't have found out like this.

Tags: est. rel., past abuse, arguing & making up, hurt/comfort, miscommunication, angst with a happy ending, hurt spencer TW: implied/referenced - child abuse, abuse & csa. trauma response that could be perceived as dissociation. misplaced frustration at neurodivergence. nothing graphic but message me for more info if needed.

Pairing: Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid

Word Count: 3.9k

Masterlist // Read on AO3 // Bad Things Happen Bingo

This fills the "Domestic Violence" square of my Bad Things Happen Bingo. It's a heavy one folks so please heed the tags, but fear not, as always we have a happy ending ahead of us! <3 Title by Rainer Maria Rilke.

Spencer knows it’s ridiculous. Derek will not hurt him: this much he knows for certain. Derek is safe, he is home, he is his person. Derek would die before laying a hand on him.

This objective knowledge does not stop the fear from building in his chest, fizzling through his veins until his whole body is alight with it, simmering under the surface of his cold skin as Derek shouts, his face contorted in anger. Spencer might know that Derek won’t hurt him, but that doesn’t mean he can forget what’s happened in the past when he’s put that same expression on crueller people’s faces.

“How could you be so irresponsible, Spencer?”

He doesn’t know. The sinking feeling of failure, of disappointing someone he loves so much settles deep in his stomach as he watches Derek pace up and down the living room while he stays firmly planted on the sofa, pressed as far into the corner as he can.

He didn’t mean to leave the oven on overnight. Again. It’s just that sometimes he gets so lost in his head, in the studies he reads just before bed that getting ready for bed happens on auto-pilot, and small things like turning the oven off slip through the cracks. Derek’s never got this angry over it before, but that’s probably because he’s never said “yes” when Derek’s sleepily asked him if he remembered to turn it off, not when he actually didn’t.

He answered on auto-pilot. He didn’t mean to lie, but that doesn’t seem to matter that much to Derek as he wears down the living room carpet with his pacing, visibly seething. He tracks him with his eyes. He can’t afford to not see the blow coming.

The blow isn’t coming, he tries to tell himself. It’s not all that convincing when Derek stops mid-pace, turning to look at him dead in the eye.

“We could’ve died, Spencer! Does that mean nothing to you?”

Spencer doesn’t reply. He wants to, he really does, but the words are stuck in his throat, choked by fear and confusion and emotion and regret, God why didn’t I turn off the oven, I should’ve been better, it’s all my fault—

“Do you seriously not have anything to say?”

Spencer stares. He has so much to say. All of it is trapped in his throat, tangled in a mess of please don’t leave me and please god don’t hit me.

“You know, I can’t deal with this right now,” Derek mutters, throwing his hands up in the air, “this is unbelievable.” Spencer watches as he shrugs a coat over his shoulders, pulls on his shoes, pauses only to grab his wallet and keys, and walks out the door without looking back.

The door slams behind him and Spencer jumps at the loud noise, jolting out of his fear-ridden stupor, wincing as he’s forced out of his head and thrust back into reality. It’s only ten past ten in the morning; a nice, sunny Saturday in late Spring, and maybe in a different universe, Spencer and Derek are packing a wicker basket with a picnic, heading off to their favourite park to feed each other strawberries and enjoy jam-filled sandwiches.

In this universe, though, Spencer drags his heavy bones to the bathroom, and peels off his clothes. He feels weighed down, tied to some point of gravity far below his feet as he avoids the mirror at all costs and lets his pajamas lay where they fall instead of gathering them into a ball and throwing them into the hamper like he usually does. He turns the water on and steps under the spray, allowing himself to revel in the warm rivulets of water caressing his cold skin.

Shampoo bottles stand untouched in the caddy to his left. He’s not there to get clean, he’s there to forget and to think all at the same time. Slowly, he sinks to the floor, leaning against the wall as the water cascades down his front, but not before he turns the heat up. It’s a small comfort: the water just on the right side of too hot running down his face and his torso and his legs, pooling at his feet momentarily before sliding down the drain, never to be seen by him again.

Today shouldn’t have started like this, and it’s a hard pill to swallow that if he hadn’t left the oven on, it wouldn’t have. Derek would have smiled when Spencer stepped into the kitchen, pulled him into his arms and kissed him gently before making them pancakes while Spencer sat on the counter-top and told him everything running through his head. Derek would listen, enthralled, whether to the sound of Spencer’s voice or the words he’s saying, and he wouldn’t shut him up, not even when they sat down to eat.

They’d finally get ready for the day late in the morning, they’d decide what they would do that day, and they’d make a point to steal as many kisses as they could; making up for the affection lost during long cases.

Spencer knows this because it’s happened so many times before. They may have only been dating for just over six months, but they already live together, having fallen hard and fast; Emily teases them for it, calls them her favourite lesbian couple, and they don’t care because they’re in love.

Despite that, though, Spencer still hasn’t told Derek.

There are nights he lies awake pondering how unfair that is. He’s held Derek as he sobbed over memories of Buford, as he spilled every awful detail of the abuse he endured; he’s comforted him after he’d tried and failed to bottom, falling into a flashback every time, no matter how much he wanted to try it.

But Spencer stays silent. He doesn’t tell him about his dad beating him, or his mom getting confused off her meds and smacking him, shoving him, even punching him that one time. He doesn’t tell him about Matthew, his first real boyfriend, trapping him in an abusive relationship that took him months to get the courage to leave. About how when a third person hurt him, he began to wonder whether it really was his fault. Whether that was the only kind of love Spencer Reid deserved.

He stays silent now, staring at the shower wall. The fear has left him now the threat has too, and a cold type of numbness replaces it, and even once the water runs cold, he doesn’t leave. He traces the same four tiles with his eyes, drawing the same pattern with his gaze over and over again as his thoughts turn to an endless cycle of he’ll leave me, he’ll stay, he’ll hit me, he won’t, until he’s not really sure what he believes.

Derek is a good man, but Spencer knows how he can be. He messes up, he forgets things, he doesn’t read situations right, he doesn’t behave the way people think he should, he doesn’t think like a neuro-typical person does. And a good man can only put up with that for so long.

The proof is in the pudding, after all. Derek has always been understanding of things like this in the past. He’s given him a hug and told him not to worry about it, that mistakes happen, and no one can be expected to remember small things like this all the time. But this morning, he was furious. Spencer’s not sure he’s ever seen him so angry in all his years of knowing him, and it was directed at him. All because of an oven left on.

Eventually, a sound from the upstairs apartment drags him from his head again, and he’s suddenly aware of the cold water, of the way his body is trembling and his fingers are pruning. He pulls himself out of the shower, turning the water off, but he stands in the middle of the bathroom, aimlessly, for a long time. By the time he finally has the sense to wrap a towel around his body, he’s basically dripped dry. His hair is soaking wet and the dripping water is freezing, but he doesn’t have the energy to find a towel for his head, too, so he leaves it.

He walks towards the bedroom and climbs into bed, pulling the fluffy duvet over his damp skin and laying his wet hair on the pillow. It feels awful, being wet and damp under the dry bedding, but he doesn’t have the energy to move, so he stays there, towel still wrapped around his legs, hair still soaking the pillow, and he stares at the wall.

He doesn’t know what time it is, and he doesn’t know when Derek will come back home. If he ever will.

⭐️

Derek slams the door behind him as he storms out of the apartment, rage consuming his every move, his every thought. The force of it rattles the door frame, echoing down the empty corridor, but he can’t find it in him to care as he marches towards the elevator. The buttons are pressed with perhaps a little more aggression than socially acceptable, but the woman already on board takes one look at his face and has the sense to stay quiet.

He gets in his car and steps on the gas, the squeal of his tyres against the floor of the garage as he speeds out satisfying him more than it probably should. His jaw is locked and tight as he drives through the streets of DC, his thoughts going a million miles an hour, quieted only when he turns the radio up loud, a blasting soundtrack to his ferocious getaway.

Adrenaline pumps through his veins as he speeds down the highway, heading out of the city towards Baltimore. He doesn’t have a destination in mind: he’s just driving straight. Straight away from the apartment. Away from Spencer.

It’s after more than an hour of driving that his jaw finally loosens and the anger that had simmered in his blood so fiercely fades into reluctant rationality. He’s somewhere in the middle of Baltimore, and the traffic — the tangled road system he actually has to focus on — drags him from the absent headspace the highway had allowed him to slip into.

“Fuck,” he mutters, and turns off the road he’s on, onto a quieter one. As soon as he’s able to pull over, he does, and he hits the steering wheel angrily. “Fuck!” He leans forward, pulling off his sunglasses and burying his head in his hands. It’s not the same kind of anger he’d felt earlier, no. This time it’s directed purely at himself, fuelled by dismal regret.

Before he can stop it, his brain replays the fight with Spencer over and over, the wall he’d put up to block it out crumbling down as images of his boyfriend flood his mind. He hadn’t registered it in the moment, but looking back, God. There was something on Spencer’s face, something so broken, so scared and he feels nauseous at the realisation that he put that there.

Over something as fucking stupid as an oven.

Truthfully, he wasn’t really angry at Spencer. Waking up to see the oven left on again, even after Spencer promised he’d turned it off, was just the straw that broke the camel’s back.

He’d fought with both his mom and Penelope yesterday, and he went to bed feeling like an utter failure, made even worse when Spencer had declined to join him, deciding instead to keep reading the series of papers he’d started earlier that evening. He woke up in a foul mood, and not even the sight of his peacefully sleeping boyfriend could make him feel better.

It’s his own fault. He should have communicated with Spencer: he should’ve told him about letting his mom down and saying the worst thing he possibly could have in his conversation with Penelope, but he didn’t. He silently stewed, and felt irrationally angry that Spencer wasn’t reading his mind. He knows for an absolute fact that if he’d asked Spencer to join him in bed last night, he would’ve dropped his studies immediately, and cuddled him until he felt better.

But he didn’t. And then he’d screamed at Spencer, in a way he never has before, over something he simply forgot to do. Derek swore to himself that he would never shout at or put Spencer down for his neurodivergent traits. Not in the way he’s seen so many people — regrettably, far too many of them on their own team — do before.

He’s always been understanding in the past, kissed Spencer’s hair and promised that it wasn’t a big deal, and he has always meant it. Because as dramatic as he’d been this morning, leaving the oven on wasn’t really the end of the world. He remembers ranting about the electricity bill, about how they were going to afford the house they were going to buy if he kept this up, about lying to him — even though he knew that was clearly an auto-pilot thing — about how dangerous it was. It’s a fan oven. They were never really in any danger.

What a god-awful way to let off the steam he’d built up and chosen not to let go.

As if he’s not already feeling shitty enough, though, his mind won’t stop circling back to the fear on Spencer’s face. The way he shouted back, but instead crammed himself into the corner of the sofa, never taking his eyes off him as he paced angrily back and forth.

He feels sick.

He digs his phone from the pocket in his sweatpants. He’s still in the clothes he sleepily pulled on in the dark this morning, and he hadn’t thought to bring his phone out with him, but luckily he’d picked it up off the kitchen counter that morning.

He clicks on Spencer’s name, listens to it ringing out as he desperately begs him to pick up. “Come on, baby, please,” he whispers, ignoring the tears burning behind his eyes. “Pick up, please.” He tries three more times before throwing it angrily on the seat next to him, allowing one more second of feeling the blind panic and the fury at himself before forcing himself to calm down.

Reaching over to his phone with one hand to turn the ringer up, he turns the ignition on and pulls back onto the road, heading back towards DC.

The traffic infuriates him, cursing as it takes thirty minutes to get back on the highway, but finally he’s back on the open road. It takes everything in him not to speed past the other cars, knowing that getting pulled over would only slow him down in the long run. He doesn’t turn the radio on. He just replays the fight again and again, each time remembering something new: something he said or something Spencer did.

He doesn’t wipe the tears away as they fall, lets them slide uncomfortably down his neck, under his collar, lets them drip into his lap, lets his nose run. It’s the only punishment he can afford himself right now.

Finally, finally, he pulls into their apartment building’s garage, finding their spot and parking roughly, abandoning the car as quickly as possible in favour of sprinting towards the elevator. He curses at the slow moving carriage, but it eventually spits him out on his floor, and he’s walking down the very corridor he stormed down just a few hours prior.

He pushes open the door to their apartment, closing it behind him softly. Suddenly, the nausea swimming in his gut isn’t just borne from regret, now fuelled by nerves and dreaded anticipation.

“Spence?” he calls softly.

He doesn’t know what to expect: he doesn’t know whether Spencer will be sad or angry, whether he’ll be screaming or crying. The kitchen and living room are empty, and the bathroom door is wide open, so he ventures into their bedroom.

Whatever he was expecting, it isn’t this.

Spencer’s tucked up in bed, duvet pulled up to his neck, facing away from the door. He doesn’t move so Derek thinks he might be sleeping, but when he circles the bed to check, he finds his eyes wide open, staring vacantly at a fixed point on the wall. They don’t flicker or blink or move when he steps into his field of vision, and Derek’s heart sinks, panic beginning to grip his chest.

“Spencer? Baby?”

When he still doesn’t move, Derek crawls onto the bed, and the movement or the sound or something must finally catch his attention, because all of a sudden his eyes are widening — in shock, surprise, fear, Derek doesn’t know — and he’s shifting under the covers.

“You’re back,” he says, and it’s so uneasy that Derek wants to cry.

“Yeah, baby, I’m back,” he says gently, “and I’m so sorry about earlier, I—”

He cuts himself off, because when he reaches to tangle his fingers in Spencer’s damp hair, he flinches. His hand freezes, but his stomach twists, because this is the confirmation he was both expecting and dreading. This is the confirmation of everything he prayed he had wrong, everything he wished he’d misinterpreted the whole drive home.

“Spence,” he whispers brokenly, withdrawing his hand, “I would never— never do… I’d never hurt you, God, I—”

A choked sob cuts him off this time, and another follows when he sees a tear sliding down Spencer’s face. A previously blank, emotionless canvas, his face is now full of sadness, tinged with the fear and guilt Derek hates himself for even suggesting was warranted in the first place.

“Derek,” he says softly, and his voice is so mangled with emotions he couldn’t even begin to decipher, it breaks his heart a little. He doesn’t say anything more though, eyes sliding shut instead as tears continue to stream down his face.

“What do you need, baby?” he asks, because it’s the only thing he can think to say. “Anything, I— anything you need, you can have, Spence, I’d give you the world, you know that.”

Spencer’s quiet for a long time, and Derek sits there on the bed anxiously awaiting a response while trying to summon all the patience he doesn’t have as he stares at Spencer’s crying face.

“A hug,” he decides eventually, and Derek almost collapses in relief because, God, he can do that.

He crosses the small space between them, and carefully folds Spencer into a hug, sighing in relief as he melts into Derek’s side, placing his head on his chest and cuddling into him. Their legs tangle together and Derek holds him as gently and as closely as he can, carding his fingers through Spencer’s damp curls while his other hand rests on his waist, his thumb caressing the bare skin there.

He’s still in his towel, he thinks sadly. He didn’t have the energy to properly dry himself before crawling into bed. As if Derek could possibly feel shittier.

They lay like that quietly for a while before Spencer finally speaks. Derek wishes he hadn’t. The words “I’m sorry”, uttered so brokenly, so miserably, have no business leaving Spencer’s mouth.

“Baby, you have nothing to apologise for,” he says fiercely. “This is all on me. I’m sorry. Sorrier than I’ve ever been, Spencer, because this is completely my fault. I wasn’t actually angry at you, that’s the first thing you need to know, and I know that makes what I did so shitty, because you hadn’t even done anything wrong, but I was so pent up and frustrated with myself and I didn’t communicate that with you and— fuck, I’m doing such a bad job of explaining, I just. I need you to know, Spencer, that I’m not angry, okay? And I’m so sorry for losing it like I did, that never should have happened.”

He pauses and takes a breath in, burying his face in Spencer’s hair as he holds him even tighter, trying to keep his grip as gentle as possible.

“I never told you,” Spencer whispers after a couple beats pass.

Derek’s heart seizes tightly and he swallows. Prepares himself. “Never told me what, sweetheart?”

“My dad, he… he wasn’t a good man and he… you know, he hurt me a lot. And then my mom, when he left and she stopped taking her meds completely, she’d get so confused,” Spencer admits, voice so quiet as he murmurs into Derek’s chest that he has to strain to hear him. “She didn’t mean to, but she’d… And then my last boyfriend, he—”

He cuts himself off as a heaving sob that seems to come out of nowhere strangles his words and it’s all Derek can do to hold him tightly as Spencer cries, whispering every reassurance he can think of through his own tears. It shouldn’t be like this, he thinks. I shouldn’t know this just because of an argument we had; just because I lost control. Spencer should’ve been able to tell me on his own terms, in his own time.

He tries to cry as silently as possible, but it’s not easy when the grief of knowing the pain Spencer’s suffered in his life is weighing heavy on his chest, and the acidic taste of guilt abounds.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers into Spencer’s hair. “I’m so sorry, baby.” He’s sorry for so many things he’s not sure he could list them all out, neatly and coherently, if he tried.

Spencer fists his hands in the soft cotton of Derek’s t-shirt. “I’m sorry I never told you.”

Derek balks at the guilt in his tone, as if he actually believes he has anything to apologise for. “Baby, you could’ve waited until we were old and grey to tell me and I wouldn’t be mad, okay? Trauma like this… it comes out in it’s own way in it’s own time. I’m not sure how or when I would’ve told you about Buford if everyone hadn’t found out the way they did. And if I’d waited to tell you, you wouldn’t be mad at me, would you?”

Spencer shakes his head.

“I’m so sorry that I triggered you the way I did, Spencer,” Derek says seriously, gently twirling a loose curl around his fingers. “It was inexcusable, and it was a problem of my own making. I know you didn’t mean to leave the oven on and I know you were operating on auto-pilot when you told me you turned it off last night, and nothing I said was true. I was mad about stuff that happened yesterday and I failed to communicate that. It’s all on me. Nothing about this is your fault, you hear me?”

“Really?”

The way Spencer cranes his neck to look up at him, the trusting innocence in his eyes both breaking and warming Derek’s heart. “Really.”

“I want to tell you, Der, it’s just—” He sighs. “I’ve never talked about it with anyone, and it’s hard. I don’t… I don’t know where to start.”

“We have all the time in the world for you to tell me, baby. You can tell me everything all at once, or drop tiny pieces of information when you feel like it, or never tell me anything else ever again, and any of that is perfectly okay. I just need you to know that what happened this morning will never happen again, okay? I promise you.”

Spencer shifts, moving from his position curled around Derek to prop himself up with one arm, facing his boyfriend properly. “Thank you,” he says earnestly, before leaning down to kiss him. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby. More than anything.” He kisses him again before moving the duvet and making to get up. “Now, how about I order us some pizza for lunch and we spend the afternoon in bed. You can read or we can watch some documentaries or a movie, whatever you want.”

A small smile crosses Spencer’s face, and nothing’s ever felt more like a win.

“I think that sounds like a plan.”

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @moreidtrash @suburban--gothic @strippersenseii @takeyourleap-of-faith @negativefouriq @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @livrere-blue @hotchseyebrows @reidology @i-like-buttons @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @hotchedyke @tobias-hankel @goobzoop @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @enbyspencer @im-autistic @thataveragenerd @anxious-enby

[cyn-00]

Ok guys so. I'm gonna need u to humor me here (and be gentle also <3)

I don't usually take requests because *pressure* BUT since u seemed to like that 700ish words thing I wrote in the middle of the night a few days ago, and since I like to prove myself when it comes to writing, I was thinking that maybe I could try writing lil snippets like that one based on these prompts

BUT! PLS THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART! Only consider the "fluff" and "general" ones, please, I love angst but I tend to digress a lot with emotional/introspective paragraphs so that wouldn't work in a 500-1000 words one shot (I'm just...not capable of writing short angst anymore)

So I guess until I get bored/overwhelmed/struggle to keep up bc of university stuff (probably a few days anyway): send me prompts! (I have no idea how long it'd take to write one of these. Never done anything like this before,,,)

Prompt List

A/N: phew finally finished my first prompt list. a vast majority of these are my own but there are a few that I found online/was inspired by.

Fluff

“Is that my shirt?” “You mean our shirt?”

“It’s you, it always has been.”

“You’re everything I could’ve wanted and more.”

“Kiss me.”

“Home stopped being a place when you entered my life.” 

“You should probably go home.” “But I’m already home.”

“You’re an idiot.” “But you love me.”

“I’d do anything for you.” 

“You took all the pillows so I’m using you as one.”

“Stop moving and let me braid your hair.”

“I’m so proud of you.” 

“Could you say that again?” “Were you not listening?” “No I was, I just like hearing your voice.”

“I didn’t think it was possible to love someone this much.”

“You are my family.”

“I’m right here.”

“Can you just please hold me?” 

“I’m pretty sure (you’re/she’s/he’s/they’re) my soulmate”

“You come here often?” “Well considering I work here, yes.”

“You know, I think my (mother/father/parents) would be proud if I brought (you/her/him/them) home.” 

“I just want to see you happy.”

“I haven’t seen (her/him/them) smile like that in ages.” 

“You made me a better person. Thank you.” 

“I’d rather live in the woods with you than in a mansion with some (girl/boy/person) I barely know.”

“This reminded me of you.” 

“Your hair is really soft.”

“You’re really warm.”

“Are you blushing?”

“Can I stay here tonight?”

“Because I love you.”

“I’ve been in-love with you since we were kids.”

“I’m never going to leave you. I promise.”

“Make a wish!”

“I love seeing you smile.”

“Why are you wearing my sweater?” “Because it smells like you.”

“I just want to be there for you.”

“I couldn’t get you out of my mind.”

“You’re just a softie.”

“You owe me.” “Fine, whatever you like.”

“You’re safe now, I’m here.”

“Why are you scared of loving?”

“You are crushing me right now.”

“Darling I love you and all, but please step out fo the kitchen.”

“I love you.”

“You’re an idiot.” “But I am your idiot.”

“Take my hand. Just trust me.”

“You’re hurt. Please just let heal it.”

“At least let me clean it.”

“I told you to take care of yourself.”

“You’re the only thing that matters.”

“Stay.”

Angst

“I’m leaving.” “Of course you are, that’s all you know how to do.”

“You started drinking again, didn’t you?” 

“You promised you’d stop drinking.” “And you promised you wouldn’t hurt me!″

“But it’s my fault right?”

“I don’t want to feel this. I want to be numb again.”

“You’re lying to me again. Why can’t you just tell me the truth for once?” 

“I love you.” “No you don’t” 

“I can’t lose you.” “You already did.”

“Did it mean anything to you? Did I mean anything to you?”

“How was I such an idiot, to believe that you, out of all people, could ever love me?”  

“I loved you.” “Then why did you let (her/him/them) get in between us?”

“Maybe they were right, you never did change.” 

“This is all in my head. It’s all happening in my head.”

“Don’t you dare walk away from this!” 

“What gives you the right to just waltz back into my life after all the pain you’ve caused.”

“You’ve changed.”

“You win, happy?”

“Any other lies left to tell me?”

“Why did you wait until I moved on?”

“Don’t look at me like that.” “Like what?” “Like you still love me.”

“Its (her/him/them), isn’t it?”

“It’s always been (her/him/them).”

“When did you stop loving me?”

“Let me go.”

“You’re not you.”

“I miss the old you.”

“What happened to their happily ever after?” “Not all love stories get a happily ever after, sometimes it’s just once upon a time.” 

“Move out of my way before I make you.”

“You deserve better.”

“I risked my life for you.”

“I never would’ve thought (she/he/they)’d end up with someone else.”

“They were perfect for each other.”

“I was happier with you.”

“I would’ve done anything for you.”

“I loved you. I loved you so so much but you hurt me.” 

“They warned me about this.” “About what?” “You.” 

“Lie to me. I don’t care what you say, just lie to me. Make me feel okay again.” 

“You broke me.”

“You just threw four years of friendship out the window.”

“Hasn’t this addiction done enough damage already?”

“Sorry doesn’t fix everything.”

“You promised.”

“I don’t need help! I need an end to this pain.”

“What am I in your life? Because as of lately I feel as though I’ve been nothing to you.”

“Leave.”

“I can’t keep playing pretend.”

“You deserve so much better.”

“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t leave.”

“I wish we never met.”

“I’m sorry I’m not enough for you.”

General

“I love you.” “Tell me that when you’re sober.” 

“It’s pouring rain why are you here?”

“I love you.” “You shouldn’t.”

“Where are you?”

“What happened?”

“Have you been taking care of yourself?”

“Is that blood?” “Yes but that doesn’t matter right now, what does matter is-” “You are literally bleeding.”

“Is that my book?”

“Are they dead?”

“You want to play pretend? Well two can play at that game.”

“Did you know that you talk in your sleep?”

“Come back to bed. Please.” 

“You’re who they warned me about.” 

“Come back.”

“You should’ve listened to me.”

“I haven’t seen you in days.” 

“Are you jealous?”

“Cheers, I’ll drink to that.” “You drink to everything.” “Cheers!”

“Why is there a deer in the room?” 

“Is that vodka? At 7 in the morning?”

“It’s not my choice.”

“Can we take this home?”

“Hey, look at me. Focus on me alright?” 

“I haven’t seen (her/him/them) smile in months.”

“(She/he/they) don’t belong with (her/him/them)!” “Than who do(es) (she/he/they) belong with?” “…..with me.”

“Come home.”

“I hope you’re happy.”

“They don’t need to know.”

“I made this for you.”

“Why is arson always your first answer?”

“Is this really the time for jokes?” 

“You always do this.” 

“Wake me up when it’s over.” 

“You look happy.” 

“I’m sorry, do I know you?” 

“Why can’t I get you out of my head?”

“Do you want that?”

“Don’t let go.” 

“Just let me stay.”

“Can I at least tell my side of the story?” 

“Do you trust me?” 

“Are you flirting with me?”

“Is the weight of your sins too heavy?”

“Just let me see (her/him/them) one last time. Please.”

“Are you afraid to die?”

“Are they really ‘just a friend’?”

“I wasn’t lying when i told you that I loved you.”

“I won’t hurt you.”

“Have you been sleeping?”

“I didn’t know where else to go.”

[reiding-rainbow]

anybody have any fic recs? can be spencer/reader, reidaway (A.K.A. spencelle), or moreid. and feel free to self-promo. fluff, smut, or anything in between. I prefer shorter fics usually unless they really engage me. if there’s smut, I prefer vanilla or sub!spencer (or somewhere in between). also i love domestic stuff and hurt/comfort. but not too whumpy.

[moreidsdaughter]

domestic moreid headcanons

spencer reid x derek morgan

summary: in which our favorite ship is at home!

genre: fluff-ish

warnings: none

a/n: a fic from the celebration.

contrary to popular belief, derek is actually the affectionate one!

derek is so attached to spencer it’s actually surprising. spencer loves the affection though, so he doesn’t mind. spencer was so used to not being touched that it made him feel all gushy.

derek LOVES spooning!

he’s always the big spoon. an exception to this, is when he feels guilty about cases.

when the couple isn’t spooning, Spencer sleeps with his upper body draped on derek’s chest and one of his legs hiked up. derek likes to grab on to that leg.

derek is always kissing spence at home...

forehead kisses

cheek kisses

collarbone kisses

french kisses

neck kisses

out of all the kisses that exist, derek has probably done it.

derek definitely does the cooking... if it were up to spencer, they would just be eating dino nuggets, boxed mac and cheese, and takeout. derek cooks an array of things because he wants to get spencer out of his comfort zone.

so movie night... a common occurrence in this household.

derek likes action movies and “chic flicks”

however, spencer is always trying to get derek to watch movies with educational value. but the thing spencer loves to watch the most is films in different languages.

the reason he likes doing this is because derek thinks that it’s super sexy. hearing spencer speak different languages...

anyways, spencer has a thing for being neat....

spencer does the cleaning for the most part, of course derek helps but spencer likes to do it.

well, it’s complicated because spence feels at ease after, but during the process he’s panicking the entire time...

either way, moreid has a bomb time at home!

[vole-mon-amour]

Tagged by @captainjowl 😌❤️ Can't go without commentaries, as always.

slow burn or love at first sight // fake dating or secret dating (1) // enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers (2) // oh no there’s only one bed or long-distance correspondence // hurt-comfort or amnesia // fantasy au or modern au (3) // mutual pining or domestic bliss (4) // smut or fluff // canon-compliant or fix-it (5) // reincarnation or character death // one-shot or multi-chapter // kid fic or road trip fic // arranged marriage or accidental marriage (6) // high school romance or middle aged romance (!! 7) // time travel or isolated together // neighbors or roommates // sci-fi au or magic au // body swap or gender bend // angst or crack (8) // apocalyptic or mundane (9)

I tag: @littletentaclemonster @darthbarnes @hotchgan @voidcreature @vanwssa @lacrimalis @beckyharvey29 @eddiemoonson @moonykat @helloashrandomnessworld @a-driftamongopenstars @bihotchrights if any of you feel like playing.

Commentaries are under the cut.

(1) this (technically, both, but i still choose secret dating) can get toxic really fast so it depends on a particular couple

(2) both bc batjokes and rhack exist but yeah, i'll take best friends to lovers over anything at any given day (stevebucky supremacy <3 also kazper and moreid and hossi)

(3) modern fantasy au!

(4) listen... who said it can't be mutual pining while doing chores?

(5) i rarely find canon that shouldn't be fixed, so I'll go with this one. much more possibilities and freedom to how it should've went in canon. canon compliant is nice only when you can squeeze what you need, but then you can easily go with a fix it in the first place

(6) neither 🙄 both make me feel really bad, nauseous even

(7) i can't stress this enough. that's why i can't go with heartstopper, young royals and other nonsense. it's perfectly fine that people like them, but i'm so tired of kids and teenagers in media. currently i am screaming about two men in their 50-60 being in love & that's the content i love having. everything that starts with adult characters (25-30-35) and older. older characters finding themselves again with a younger partner that is genuinely in love with them is also great (think 'A Single Man')

(8) neither. if there's no comfort after angst, I'll scroll past both. i used to love angst, now i can't handle reading angst for the sake of angst.

(9) leaning towards mundane, but if apocalyptic is executed right, i can do that, too (hi to tlou). apocalyptic mundane works, too.

[thewistlingbadger]

Currently thinking about Spencer and Derek's first house they got together, aka their forever home.

The whole time they had been dating, they've been living separately. Whenever they felt like holding the other they'd stay the night at their places. So they finally leave the BAU, and Idk, but maybe Derek build a house for them

He meant to just redo it but there was some serious problems that were hidden so he was like "fuck it"

The house is a combination of both their styles. It was a lot of compromise because Spencer was like "Derek are you serious we are not having an all white kitchen-" or some other stupid shit because we all know Spencer's style and how he'll argue over the smallest things and whatnot. And Derek's like "babe you gotta think about the property value, it'll be hard to sell the house if the light fixtures look like they belong in a haunted house" and he's into modern stuff.

Besides their two different styles, the house has many cool and personal touches. The staircase is a bookshelf and Spencer looses his shit over it but the thing is, you would think bookshelves would satisfy him but if you give a mouse a cookie, he'll ask for some milk. The more bookshelves you give Spencer Reid you're basically asking him to buy more books. Derek could bookshelves everywhere in the house and there would STILL be books in the bathroom or the coat closet because "i ran out of space, where else was i supposed to put them?"

There's lots of paintings on the wall bc if it were up to Spencer, the walls would be bare. There's also lots of pictures. Of them, the team, that kind of stuff. There's also like a wall that's dedicated to the people that left. Like there's chess stuff for Gideon and the star puzzle for Emily, etc.

It took them forever to paint the house because: "so how long do you think it'll take to paint the house?" "With a team, it'll take-" "a team? Derek Morgan, this is our first home together. We will be painting every wall by hand."

The BAU comes over whenever they get the chance and helps the two paint the house. Countless times have they fucked it up tho and had to restart. Another reason it took them so long was because Spencer Reid, who knows literally nothing about houses or styling them basically shut down all of Derek's ideas because it "didn't seem right". To which Derek had to remind him that "you think too much. You just gotta feel it." There's a lot of paint colors out there and having that amount of choice is bad for Spencer. But yeah. At the end of the day each room is a different but soothing color.

As for the house itself, it has 4 bedrooms and 3 1/2 bathrooms. The master bedroom with the master bath (which btw, the tub in there? Hella nice.), A guest room (for family or the team), a kids room (do i think they want kids? Yes but I think they don't get kids because i personally imagine moreid just growing old together and there being no one else. Jack, Henry, and other kids stay at their house sometimes. Also, i think Spencer hand painted the ceiling in the kids room to be filled with constellations.), And an office. The office has two sides for the two that work in there. Derek's side has vinyls on the wall, and Spencer's side has a white board, in case the team ever calls them about a case.

The house has high ceilings and so one day Derek comes home with groceries and he hears Spencer singing bc "wow the echo is amazing in here" and it's adorable.

Spencer just being amazed at the house. If you told him when he first joined the BAU that he would leave with a loving partner, an amazing family, a dog, and a gorgeous house he'd be like "the odds of that being true are astronomically low."

Ever since they moved in that house, he's researched statistics about houses, about homeowners, and the things that they have in their house. Stuff like "over 3/4 of homes in America have carpet or rugs. This is slowly dying out because new trends. In the 70's carpet was a big deal but now everyone wants a home with hardware floors."

Idk if Clooney is a girl dog or a boy dog or if they're even alive but let's just say Clooney had puppies. So yes there's dog supplies in house

They've got blackout curtains in their bedroom because Spencer has a real hard time with sleep. And because they left the BAU Spencer doesn't have to wake up in the morning. Derek is scared at how much that kid can sleep. "Babe, you've been in and out of sleep for the past 4 days. Are you ok-" "Derek, i swear to God, I've gotten up early for literally half of my life. If you don't let me make up the hours i missed,-" "Ok, ok i get pretty boy. I'm sorry go back to bed."

Derek more than Spencer makes sure that everything is always locked. The windows and doors get their locks replaced a lot just in case. Also, the only people that have a key to the house is them two. It's not that they don't trust the others it's just in case. No spare key hidden outside the house or that shit. They also got camera's and stuff, probably just vivnt or something like that.

Spencer doesn't like speakers. So for music they've got these around the house

For TV, lots of VHS tapes. Spencer being a technophobe and him not liking change. He's got all his favorite documentaries, tv shows, movies, and cartoons on VHS so it's not big deal for him. I think they probably got cable so Derek can watch sports. Derek's got his favorite movies on CD and they watch those and cuddle on some nights.

Hand sanitizer, wipes, tissues, etc can be found easily everywhere in the house. I also think they burn candles or have that thing where you put the wax in and spreads the smell of the wax like steam in their house.

The bathroom has SO much of Spencer's shit there. You would think he'd be more organized but that's the one thing he hasn't really adjusted to. Hair products, skin products, medication, different toothpastes, whatever the hell you can think of, it's all scattered in there.

guys talk to me about moreid i can't stop thinking about them

[fortheloveofwonderland]

12 Days of Shipmas

CM Bingo 2021

Spencer x Reader Blurbs

Spencer x Reader One Shots

Spencer x Read Series

* = authors faves / F = fluff / A = Angst / S = smut

Maxcer

Maxcer Headcanons - domestic/sex life. Requested by Anon. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F / S NSFW 18+

Life is a Highway - after leaving prison, Spencer needs to get away. He never dreamed he would meet a woman who would change everything along the way. Requested by @dreatine F

Wildest Dreams* - Spencer and Max spend one wild night together. But will it leave them wanting more? Requested by Anon. F / S NSFW 18+

Friends - an asshole and a knight in shining armour. Requests by Anon. A / F

10,000 Hours - Spencer just wants to learn everything there is to know about Max. Requested by Anon. F

Prompt #16 - “What’s that sound?” “The sound of my heart breaking.” “Don’t be so dramatic.” Requested by Anon. F

Heart Like Yours - Spencer never thought he would have some like Max love him. But what he never gets to tell her feels the same way? Requested by Anon. A / F

34+35 - Spencer and Max’s first time. Requested by @layaili S / F

Hotchniss

London Doesn't Hold a Candle - with Emily back from London, how will Hotch show her he missed her? Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas and Office Drinks Square for CM Bingo. S

Nobody - meeting Emily's parents doesn't go to plan when all Emily is wants to do is misbehave. Requested by Anon. F / S NSFW 18+

Peace* - a series of chance meetings over the years. Will Emily ever give Aaron some peace? Requested by @ssa-m-187 F

Strawberries and Cigarettes - after Emily has to fake her own death, the only thing that keeps her memory alive for Aaron is the taste of strawberries and cigarettes. Requested by Anon. A / F

South of the Border - a vacation fling is just what Aaron needs to forget about the stresses of his life. Requested by Anon. F / S NSFW 18+

Because of You - Emily Prentiss is a drug to Aaron. And he doesn’t ever want to quit her. Requested by Anon. F / S NSFW 18+

Reidaway

Reidaway Headcanons - prison and post prison. Requested by @dreatine Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F

Black Velvet - a chance encounter with a beautiful bartender during a case ignites a flame in Spencer he didn't know existed. Requested by @dreatine F

Other Pairings

All In - Garvez - Garcia likes to know where she stands. Is Luke all in? Requested by Anon. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F

Jemily Headcanons - Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F

Blow Me Away - Moreid - all Morgan wants in the world is to have Reid's incredible lips on him. Requested by Anon. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. S NSFW 18+

Sugar Daddy - Hotchreid - Spencer and Jack make Aaron's heart melt with halloween candy. Requested by @emmyraebird. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F

Perfect Sense - Temily - Garcia and JJ find out about Tara and Emily's secret relationship thanks to a drunken girls night. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. F

Teasing to Please - Penemily - Garcia thinks it will be funny to tease Emily at work. Emily does not agree and has to punish her. Requested by Anon. Part of the 12 Days of Shipmas. S NSFW 18+

The 1 - Jeid - how I think Spencer should have reacted after JJ's confession. Requested by Anon (not romantic). A

Champagne Problems - Emily Prentiss x gn! Reader - you were the love of Emily's life. So why did you turn down her proposal? Requested by Anon. A

Dangerous Woman - Spencer Reid x Emily Prentiss - it's wrong and it's against the rules. But rules are made to be broken, right? Requested by Anon. A / F

Prompt #20 - Spencer Reid x Emily Prentiss - “You’re not my knight in a shining armour.” “Well you're not exactly my ideal damsel in distress.” Requested by Anon. F

Prompt #7 - JJ x Will - “Maybe one day you’ll get to know me, not just from letters you’ve read.” Requested by Anon. F

Wildest Dreams - Reidams - Right before Cat Adams is executed she can’t help but ruminate on the things she didn’t do… @tobias-hankel Pre-Whumptober Challenge A / S

[spencerspecifics]

What about a moried fluffy fic based on You Belong With Me by: Taylor Swift

You have no clue how much I absolutely love this song prompt thank u anon moreid is my shit here we go. (It is fluffy but it’s angsty in the beginning so yeah stay for the fluff thanks.) And I’m so sorry this took so long to get up! I took some time off from writing bc of lots of factors.

Lowkey TW?? Slight homophobia Bc Derek’s gf thinks he’s “too gay” even tho he’s just bi Also, song lyrics are in bold lettering. They’re going to be part the story here and there to help plot and whatnot so yeah!

———————————————————————

You Belong With Me

———————————————————————

Spencer had a problem. Namely a person problem. A Derek Morgan problem. Spencer didn’t hate Derek, quite the opposite, actually. Spencer was crushing hard on the man. And he couldn’t do anything. Spencer would rather lose his right hand then tell Derek how he felt about him, he couldn’t risk their friendship over his stupid little crush.

But just because he hid his feelings, ignored them through hell and high water- it didn’t mean they weren’t real, or weren’t there. They were both very real and apparent. Every time Derek called him ‘pretty boy’ or ‘genius’ or ‘handsome’, every time Derek wrapped his arm around him casually or did small things to showed him he cared, caused Spencer to blush and go speechless. Spencer was smart, but how to react to someone you’re infatuated with giving you attention, he’d never be able to solve that.

Time and time again, though, he found himself in situations where it was just him and Derek- and everything in his brain and body would scream at him to tell him how much he liked him, tell him how they should be together. It just made sense, after all.

Long paragraph short, here are the four times Spencer felt like they belonged together, and the one time Derek realized they do belong together.

~

“...You’re on the phone with your girlfriend, she’s upset. She’s goin’ off about something that you said, ‘cause she doesn’t get your humor like I do...”

~

Spencer hung out with Derek a lot, it was just by default. He wasn’t a social individual, but he pack bonded with the team. Spencer saw everyone there as his friends, so yeah, he hung out with Derek. They would go do things together, grab lunch, get coffee, meet up to go shopping. Painfully mundane tasks that were so domestic it could cause spencer another migraine if he thought about it for long enough.

It was on one of these mundane days when problems slowly arose. They were in the mall, sat in the food court. Spencer was looking over a new book he had just bought, it was a thick book on physics, it would probably take him a day or two at most to read it, his tray of food in front of him was still mostly untouched.

Unlike Spencer, Derek was eating. Though it was greasy mall pizza, it was still food. Derek decided he’d run a few extra miles to work it off as some sort of consequence for his action.

They sat in silence, Spencer already flipping through pages quickly, mouthing the words he was reading over to himself; and Derek chewing silently as he watched the genius in front of him.

That was, until, Derek’s phone rang. Breaking the ambiance that had surrounded the two. Spencer didn’t look up, he was too invested in the book in front of him. Derek reacted, though, wiping his hands off on a napkin before grabbing his cell phone out of his back pocket. He looked over the caller ID, it was Melissa.

Melissa was his newest fling, Spencer had heard bits and pieces of Garcia and Derek’s conversation surrounding the topic, but he knew the bare minimum- deciding best to not involve himself with how his crushes romantic life was soaring- meanwhile his was crashing.

Spencer didn’t know it was Melissa though, not until Derek pulled the phone up to his ear and said; “Hey, Melissa!”

If anyone on their team was with them and watching Spencer, they would have noticed the way his eyes looked off the book for a moment, up at Derek, before immediately turning back down; to reread the same page he didn’t need to reread because he could just go back into his memory to figure out what the words on the paper meant to say. But he had to reread the page. The strongest memory in the whole universe couldn’t tell him what was on the page in front of him, he was distracted.

Melissa on the other line started speaking. Derek listened before responding; “Oh, not much, Y’know- just at the mall with the doc.”

Spencer kept himself staring down at the book in front of him, even though he could feel the blush rising up to his ears. It was stupid that made him blush like a schoolgirl. But he couldn’t help it. So instead, he hid in the pages about quantum mechanics. Something real, something not confusing. Something that was pure and basic and understanding.

“No-“ Derek chuckled, “No, pretty boy ain’t that type of doctor,” god, this was going to be the death of Spencer. Pretty boy always was something that made him melt. He couldn’t help it, god knows he tried. He did all the distraction techniques he could find. None of them really worked.

Spencer opted to hide in his book more, act like he wasn’t listening to Derek. Even though he was. He was always hooked on every last word the man spoke, it always mattered. This was just a hopeless effort, Spencer realized, as he sunk down in the uncomfortable plastic chair.

“Now, what on earth are you- hey, baby- beautiful, what are you-“ Derek started, sounding concerned.

Spencer couldn’t help it at this point, he looked up over the top of the book. Derek was looking at his phone in bewilderment. It was no longer up to his ear.

“...Everything okay?” Spencer asked curiously after a moment. Derek just sighed setting his phone down on the table next to his food tray. “I don’t even know, man. I called you pretty boy and that made Melissa flip- she was all like ‘who’s pretty boy? We discussed you being bisexual already, you better not be changing up on me’. Then she hung up.”

“That doesn’t make sense.” Spencer replied, book still up between him and Morgan. “Yeah, I’m confused. It was a joke.” Derek explained to Reid, as if Spencer was ever owed an explanation regarding this.

“She must be insecure.” Spencer theorized plain and simple. Derek watched him curiously instead of asking anything to lead him on, “If she gets the idea that we’re a thing- just based on a nickname, then she’s gonna hate you and Garcia. You don’t need someone like that.”

Derek sighed, “You’re right. But I really thought she was great.” “Maybe she is,” Spencer shrugged, “I don’t know her. You do. All I’m saying is, she won’t like you and Garcia if she didn’t like my nickname.”

That elicited a chuckle from Derek, a sound Spencer always cherished in hearing. “Yeah, I can’t have someone hating my favorite boy wonder,” once again, Spencer could feel the blush coming onto his face. He was just hoping the lighting inside the mall food court didn’t make it all too obvious. “I’ll talk to her about it.” Derek decided. Spencer just nodded, not entirely wanting to talk right now.

“Yeah.. um, do what’s best.” Spencer agreed blandly. He wasn’t sure what else to say. And wasn’t this just laughable? Giving his crush dating advice? Spencer wasn’t stupid, but he was in this scenario.

“Yeah, I will. Anyways,” Derek continued the conversation casually, reaching out covering Spencer’s book with his hand. “What are you-“ Spencer started, confused. “Taking away your book. Eat before your food gets cold.” Derek spoke plainly, as if this was so obvious. He pulled Spencer’s book out of his grasp, setting it down next to himself; before pushing Spencer’s untouched tray of food in front of him.

“I’m not very-“ Spencer started, already trying to reach back for his book. Derek just shook his head, pulling the book closer to him. “Nuh-uh, not today. Not today. You’re eating. No if’s, and’s, or but’s.”

Spencer sunk down in his seat a little as he finally caved, agreeing and eating the mall food. Granted, it wasn’t great, but it was food, and he did need to eat. Last thing he had eaten that day was a granola bar for breakfast, and Derek knew that he forgot to eat.

He ate in silence as Derek watched him, before moving his gaze to casually watch the other mall patrons. It was so entirely stupid and domestic of them. It was nothing special, it wasn’t even that good of a memory. But for some reason, Spencer knew that was the first time he felt something new towards Derek. More new than just his crush. It was a new, overwhelming feeling of “I wouldn’t treat you that way” “I wouldn’t care if you called someone babygirl” “I would be better for you” before finally, his mind landed on, “you belong with someone who wouldn’t judge. Someone like me. You belong with me.”

That’s when Spencer knew he was fucked, more so than before.

~

“...I’m in the room, it’s a typical Tuesday night. I’m listening to the type of music she doesn’t like. And she’ll never know your story like I do...”

~

The second time was at Spencer’s apartment. He had complained about his bookshelf not being stable enough to hold all his books, and Derek had practically invited himself over; “C’mon, Reid. It’ll be good. Get some quality time without the ladies, we can order Chinese, plus I can show you how to fix your shelf so you don’t have to ask for help next time.”

So yeah, now they had gone directly from work to Spencer’s apartment- the only pit stop being to Derek’s house to pick up his toolbox, as Spencer didn’t have one.

Spencer wished he wasn’t such a pushover, because damnit, now he was gonna be in his apartment with Derek. That didn’t seem like a problem to anyone else, obviously- because they weren’t crushing hard on the guy. So Spencer just had to stand there and hide how much he liked Derek, and how at home Derek made his apartment feel- because it felt better with him there. He belonged there.

Spencer ignored his thoughts as they got into his apartment, he led Derek over to the problematic bookshelf in question. Some of the books had toppled off the shelves, and were on the ground below. “Damn, Reid, you don’t mess around with all these books.” Derek joked lightly as he looked over the immense amount of books Spencer had shoved onto the shelf; Derek squatted down, lowering the tool kit next to him as he started taking books off the shelves one by one so he could further inspect what was wrong with it.

Spencer protested, not understanding Derek was joking, “It’s not my fault- the bookshelf is supposed to hold books, if it can’t do what’s promised then that’s on the manufacturers error.”

Derek just chuckled slowly in response before replying, still pulling books off the shelves “Don’t worry, pretty boy, we’ll get this sorted out for you, alright? Just get some music on so we got something to hang to.” Derek wasn’t looking at Spencer, thank god- or he’d see how the genius got so flustered so quickly, how quickly a blush spread across his face, and how he immediately looked away from him, to the walls, the floor. To look at anything but Derek.

“Yes- right. Music.” Spencer changed his focus, he couldn’t think about how good it felt to be called a pet name by Derek. He couldn’t let himself think about it, or else he’d never stop. So he busied himself with getting some music to play through the quiet apartment, he turned over to his old radio that was sat on his study desk, it was a loud radio, that’s why he got it. It was compact, but if he put it in the bathroom he could hear it from the kitchen. It was the perfect device for him.

Spencer turned the radio on, the channel he always listened to was already tuned in, so he left it that way. Soft instrumental music started flowing out of the speakers, Derek stopped his motion of putting books down to turn and look at Spencer semi-curiously; “What’s this music?” “Classical.” Spencer replied easily, looking down at the radio as he messed with the volume dial that always seemed to be loose. “It’s on 88.1, they play strictly instrumental and classical pieces. It’s nice.”

Derek didn’t respond, Spencer didn’t need him to respond. It was an inconsequential conversation about music. If Derek didn’t like the station, he was more than welcome to change it to another. But he didn’t, it was Spencer’s apartment, and the soft classical music playing just seemed fitting to play there. Plus Derek just wanted the music as a background sound to help him focus, it wasn’t really important what it was- just that there was music playing.

Spencer went off to the kitchen to find the menu he had saved from the local Chinese restaurant that does deliveries, meanwhile Derek continued pulling books off the shelves. Melissa would hate him for being here, ever since the call at the mall, she was convinced Derek was going to leave her for him- or for another guy. She thought he was “too gay” to stay with her, obviously that’s not how him or his bisexuality works. But Melissa didn’t see it that way.

God, everything Derek saw, Melissa saw differently, it was ironic he was even with her. He saw Penelope Garcia as his best female friend, his babygirl. Melissa saw her as a threat, they had a whole argument about it. Melissa had finally stopped seeing Garcia as a threat when he told her that Garcia was wrapped up in Kevin drama. He wanted to tell Garcia about all of this, but he knew that if he did she would immediately tell him to dump her. Anyone that came between their friendship wasn’t allowed, and that wasn’t a rule Garcia had made up, it was more of an understanding they had come to about their dynamic as friends.

Derek just hadn’t dumped her yet out of fear. This was his first significant other in so long, it felt like a failure to start something and end it. He wanted to fix it. Though he knew it was unlikely he could, he still wanted to try.

Derek kept thinking as he finished pulling the books off until there were none left, he then pulled on the board of the shelf to see how unstable it was, all while continuing to think. He thought about Melissa, but none of it was really positive. It was all what she would hate about him being here, other than the obvious of being with Spencer (which she already disliked. She hated the genius and she hadn’t ever spoken to him, which Derek didn’t think was rational at all.) She would hate how Spencer’s apartment was, the green walls and shelves of books, the lack of a television, the soft glow from the lamps. Derek found every single last one of these qualities endearing, it helped show who Spencer was as a whole. Melissa would see it as a problem.

She’d say green was a gross color, that Spencer needed to be aware of pop culture and get a television, she’d say that Spencer didn’t get out enough and he lived like a hermit; she’d say the lighting was weird and dark, instead of soft and calming.

Derek let out a sigh, deciding to abandon his thoughts as a whole, because they were just starting to irritate him. Spencer was great the way he was, Melissa was being problematic; and him and her really needed couples counseling or something. That was the decision he landed on as he gave his full attention to the wiggly boards in Spencer’s bookshelf.

Derek pulled on the shelf again to test it’s strength. It was loose, pretty close to just falling down altogether. It was good he was here to fix it, Derek concluded, as he reached for the screwdriver in his toolkit.

~

The night continued on, Derek went through part by part, working on fixing Spencer’s bookshelf; meanwhile Spencer had ordered them dinner from the local Chinese place. Reid had thought about setting up the dinner at his kitchen table, before immediately regretting that idea. This was casual, it wasn’t some type of sit down dinner with Derek. That’s the last thing he needed, Spencer decided, as he walked over to Derek and handed him the carton of beef broccoli and a pair of chopsticks to go with.

Derek took them and put them down next to himself quickly, before pivoting into a sitting position on the floor and turning himself away from the bookshelf, facing exactly to the dinner table- which is where Spencer had opted to sit at, alone.

“What’re you doing all the way over there?” Derek’s spoke out to him. Spencer tried to be casual, “All my stuff’s over here, and it’s not that far from you,” he shrugged, hoping Derek wouldn’t go any deeper. But of course, he did. “And I’m over here, so bring your stuff my way- you’re gonna make your repairman eat sitting on the floor alone? That’s cold, man.”

Spencer rolled his eyes as he picked up his carton of orange chicken and rice, “Okay, I’m here.” He tried to sound like he was annoyed, instead of stupidly simultaneously happy and unhappy with derek’s request (happy because his stupid crush on Derek, unhappy because of the same, unfortunate reason).

He made his way over to Morgan, sitting down across from him and using the back of his couch as a makeshift chair prop to lean against. He opened up his food, as Derek was now satisfied with this series of events and had gone back to paying attention to his beef broccoli. Spencer picked up his fork, ready to eat and just ignore how he was feeling, when Derek spoke up again; “Seriously- you still don’t know how to use chopsticks?”

Suddenly, Spencer was giving Derek a glare that had no malice, while Derek just chuckled at Spencer’s fury. “I’m tellin’ you. You need to learn how to use chopsticks.” “It’s fine.” Spencer argued weakly, “No way, if suddenly all the forks, knives, and spoons vanished, you’d have to eat with chopsticks.”

“Not true if sporks are still a thing.” Spencer pointed out, “I’m gonna smack you.” Derek replied, now it was Spencer’s turn to laugh.

~

“...But she wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts, she’s cheer captain and I’m on the bleachers. Dreaming ‘bout the day when you wake up and find. That what you’re looking for has been here the whole time...”

~

The third time was when Spencer had resigned, accepting his feelings for what they were. He was now simply playing the waiting game, of waiting his crush out- because god knows he can’t go on like this forever. He hated how things have changed from a small crush into a serious never ending stream of thoughts he had whenever he was with Derek, but that’s how it was for him now.

He had ways to keep himself in check, though. As he always did. One was re-reading long old stories to himself from memory. It usually worked pretty well, and it was a good way to just pass the time in general.

Except for one, especially horrid time, when the FBI baseball team had a game against the CIA’s.

Spencer wasn’t playing, thank god for that. He wasn’t good at sports, though that one time he played baseball with Derek earlier in the season was a great memory he loved to go back to and remember. But that was a fluke, and he knew if he played again it wouldn’t go nearly as well.

Since he wasn’t playing, him and the rest of the team had come along to bring Morgan moral support from the sidelines of the bleachers. What Spencer hadn’t expected was Melissa showing up, too.

~

She showed up at the same time the team did to the field, they set up on the bleachers with some blankets and a basket full of snacks (courtesy of one Penelope Garcia.) and then she was suddenly walking over, surprising the team.

“Hi- um, are you Garcia? Is this the area for the BAU?” She asked, she had shoulder length brown hair, hazel eyes, and was wearing a flowy pink and yellow sundress. She was pretty, borderline beautiful, there was no denying that.

Spencer decided to start re-reading the books in his head by that point. He could already guess it was Melissa, as Rossi wouldn’t have invited a woman to this event until at least the ninth or eighth date (though with Rossi, Spencer never really knew how he operated in terms of dating, and he had no desire to know). Spencer also knew she wasn’t Hotch’s, as Hotch was too focused on Jack and the team to even consider dating.

Emily was single, and definitely would not invite a guy (or girl) to this either. J.J. was happy with Will, and Penelope had the on and off thing with Kevin. So yeah, Spencer deduced easily that this beautiful mysterious woman was Melissa.

The fact Derek invited Melissa rubbed Spencer the wrong way. But it wasn’t his business, he reminded himself, as he did his best to start focusing in on pride and prejudice in his mind.

Garcia began welcoming Melissa, even though it wasn’t necessary; “It is! And I am! Hi! Are you Melissa? Derek told me you were coming!”

Spencer did his best to not focus on Melissa, skipping forward a few chapters into pride of prejudice in his mind, to keep himself focused. He got pulled from his book though, as Melissa introduced herself and Garcia started introducing the team back;

“Well, grandpa over there is David Rossi,” “Easy, or else you won’t get those extra vacation days I offered you.” Rossi replied simply as hell, reaching for a bag of chips from the basket. “Fine- that esteemed gentleman right there is David Rossi.” “Better.” Rossi responded, a small grin showing across his face. Melissa laughed softly with Garcia and Rossi for a moment before Penelope continued on;

“That’s Aaron Hotchner, and his son Jack.” Garcia pointed them out, Jack was playing on his Nintendo DS, only looking up to wave briefly as Hotch reached over to shake Melissa’s hand. “Nice to meet you.” “You too.” She smiled at him.

“Those two lovely ladies are Jennifer Jareau and Emily Prentiss, plus Jennifer’s hubby Will and their adorable son Henry,” they all shook hands with Melissa, and J.J. briefly told her that it wasn’t necessary to call her “Jennifer” but instead “J.J.” as that was the name she was most used to.

“Then, we got Doctor beautiful brain, Spencer Reid.” Spencer looked up, giving Melissa a small wave, finally looking her head on. He had seen her, sure, but he hadn’t made eye contact with her until right now. And damn, she looked wild behind the eyes. And not in a good way. She was perky, seemingly almost as positive as Penelope. But that positivity didn’t reach her eyes. She looked Spencer up and down, and there was something deep in her gaze that made him want to get up and walk to the CIA side of the bleachers. It was clear he was going to have to walk on eggshells around her, and he wished he knew why.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Spencer offered up as a greeting, “You too,” Melissa replied, smiling as she turned on her polite charm again. It was only in her eyes he could see her distaste towards him. “I’ve heard so much about you.”

~

Melissa settled down, sitting next to the rest of the team as they waited for the game to start. She was thankfully seated near Emily, J.J., and Garcia. So Spencer and her’s conversation was limited.

That was until, he was brought up in conversation; “Oh geez- one of the funniest things was when Spence and Morgan got stuck in that elevator together,” J.J. recounted, causing all four of them to laugh; meanwhile Spencer didn’t react. He was still deep in his mind reading, and though he heard his name called, it didn’t cause him to want to stop.

“Yeah- I heard about that from Derek, he said Spencer spouted off some fact about people and elevator deaths because he was scared.” Melissa turned to Spencer as she spoke, giving him an in to speak. Spencer didn’t realize she had even turned to him, as he was fully focusing his brain power on the pages of the book he had read over before.

“Uh.. what’s he doing?” Melissa asked in a hushed voice to J.J., “Oh- he’s just reading. Spencer, hey.” J.J. said, leaning over and tapping his shoulder, finally catching his attention; causing him to open his eyes.

“Sorry- what?” Spencer finally spoke, as he was fully there and listening to them now, instead of somewhat ignoring them and focusing on a memory of a book.

“..J.J. said you were reading?” Melissa asked curiously, obviously confused. Spencer nodded, “Yes. I was. I have an eidetic memory so I can look back at anything I’ve ever read. So sometimes I go back and read books I’ve read before.” Spencer explained awkwardly, “I do it to, uh, pass the time.”

“Hm.. that’s.. that’s cool. Derek mentioned you were smart, recounting lots of facts.” Melissa said slowly, it seemed like she was trying to gain some sort of edge in the conversation, but thankfully Emily butted in casually- not realizing the odd atmosphere that was slowly building.

“Oh yeah- Reid’s always doing that. Talk to him on Halloween and all he talks about is how paganism played a major role in the now very American, very non-pagan holiday.” The girls laughed on innocently as Melissa gained a serious look in her eye again.

“You know everything?” She asked him, “No.” he replied, he was self assured in this field, he knew how to handle himself when people were doubting his intelligence level. “I just know a lot.” He clarified.

Melissa looked like she was ready to speak, say something to him- he had no clue if it would be good or bad. But everyone’s attention got redirected on the whooping sounds both teams made as they entered the field. The game was starting.

~

Spencer had stayed focused on the game, even running statistics and probabilities in his head on who would come out victorious. Rossi made a joke they should bet on the game like people do on horses, and he’d just cheat and use Reid to make sure he won.

The rest of the team didn’t go for that, as they would employ the same strategy as Rossi, and Spencer was smart enough to give them all the wrong answers so he would actually win.

It was now the third inning, J.J. had gone with Hotchner and Will to take a short walk with the kids, as they were getting bored in their seats. Rossi went off to flirt it up with the older woman who was running the concessions stand, and Emily and Garcia had gone off to the bathroom together.

Now it was just Melissa and Reid alone, and Reid didn’t like her company. He didn’t mean it in a rude way, but also maybe he did- for his very stupid and very personal reason that she was actively dating his crush. But besides that reason, she seemed off, and on a team of behavioral analysts, he couldn’t be the only one who noticed.

There was something wrong with her, but Spencer couldn’t place his finger on what. That was, until, she sat down next to him on the bleachers. “So,” she started casually, “what’re you reading up there?” “Pride and Prejudice.. have you read it?” Spencer replied, doing his best to make polite conversation.

Melissa shook her head, “No, way too long of a book for me.” Spencer just nodded, an “Ah” sound escaping his lips before their conversation entirely diminished as they sat in silence, watching the CIA’s team line up for batting.

Derek was on second base, and while he waited for the CIA team to finish lining up, he turned to the only two people still on the bleachers and waved. Melissa waved in response excitedly, “Go Derek!” She shouted for good measure, Reid on the other hand just gave a small wave to him.

Their personalities were very different, Spencer gathered.

“Derek helped you with a bookshelf the other week, right?” Melissa asked after silence had settled over them, and Reid had almost returned to his brain book. Her question stopped him from reading, though.

Spencer nodded, “Uh, yeah. He helped fix my bookshelf, the boards were all wobbly and books couldn’t stay on.” Melissa hummed in response for a moment, before looking back out to the field. Derek was now busy talking to a teammate, a guy Spencer recognized from the terrorist division.

“Look, Spencer,” Melissa finally spoke again, letting out a sigh before she continued on; “We both know Derek is an attractive man, a great man. But he’s my man. I don’t need you confusing him and making him switch sides- believe me, I want to think that you two are just the best of friends and that’s it. But I don’t believe it, not for a second, especially not after hearing how he talks about you, and finally meeting you.”

Spencer stayed quiet, not looking at Melissa, instead opting to stare at his hands, that were now firmly clasped together as he took in what she was saying. “We are just friends, though..” Spencer finally spoke up in a weak defense for himself. Melissa just chuckled, their pleasant conversation had somehow turned to her speaking to him in a sickly sweet malicious tone.

“I don’t think you are. I think there’s something more, and I don’t want things to go any further- with either of you.”

Spencer stayed quiet again, seriously considering exiting the bleachers and getting a cab (as the team had carpooled over to this event together.) and just leaving, going back to his apartment and faking the stomach flu for a day and a half. It seemed so appealing to just disappear right now.

Melissa continued on after she realized Spencer wasn’t going to say anything. “I’m not trying to be the bad guy here, Spencer. You seem very kind, and smart. You told me earlier you don’t know everything, but you know a lot,”

Spencer nodded, that was true, he had said that, she kept going; “I hope you now know where your place is. Away from Derek. And I hope you know you aren’t alone with me talking to you, I would be telling Penelope Garcia the same exact thing, except she has a boyfriend, Kevin. Derek told me. So you’re the only single one who poses a problem. I hope we can be friends- but you need to back up.”

And that was all, she got up and moved away, and just in time as Emily and Garcia made their reappearance from the bathroom and onto the bleachers.

Spencer stayed frozen, however. Not really sure what he could say or do. All he knew now is that he had a very good reason to dislike Melissa. And he did, as much as he hated to admit it. He disliked Melissa, he wanted her gone. He didn’t want her and Derek together.

He was now only more sure that he would treat Derek better, he wouldn’t go around threatening his friends- he couldn’t even imagine that as something he would ever want to do.

Spencer stayed, shrunken on the bleachers as he watched the team play, staying quiet and reserved while Melissa and the rest of the team cheered.

Spencer just hoped Derek figured out that Melissa wasn’t good for him sooner than later, or else he’d never get out of the relationship scratch-free.

~

“Walkin’ the streets with you and your worn out jeans. I can’t help thinking this is how it ought to be. Laughin’ on the park bench thinking to myself, ‘hey isn’t this easy?’. And you got a smile that could light up this whole town. I haven’t seen it in a while since she brought you down. You say you’re fine I know you better than that. Hey, whatcha doing with a girl like that?”

~

Since Spencer’s unfortunate encounter with Melissa, he had done his best to steer clear of Derek. Only being with him when necessary (and they were only really together for work, though for the few latest times that Derek’s invited him out to get food or see a movie, Spencer’s declined).

Derek had subtly caught notice, wondering why Reid had been declining his invitations. At first he thought it was because Reid was busy, he was somehow also getting a bachelors degree in philosophy at the moment, it made since if he had limited free time.

But then he did more thinking, and even if reid was busy- he always made time for Derek. Morgan knew that for a fact, because every time he needed help (work related or not) Spencer was there, and ready to assist. Even if Reid was studying, the kid read so fast he only needed to read something once to remember everything. So it didn’t make sense. Not at all. Spencer was avoiding him.

So why? Derek now had to get alone with Reid, he needed to see what this was about.

~

And Derek got his chance, after solving a case in the sleepy city within Maine, called Rangeley. The teams plane was having a malfunction issue with a part of the engine, so they were stuck there for an extra day. Unfortunate for everyone else, but a blessing in disguise for Derek. It was the perfect time for the team to hang together, maybe get some meals or see a movie. But Derek set up a plan.

~

Morgan knocked on Spencer’s door the morning they had nothing to do, with his plan already getting set in motion. This was step one, of many.

Reid responded in his own special fashion, opening the door a crack to look out at Derek and into the hall, his hair looked messy, he was still slightly bleary eyed- and he was still in his pajamas and mismatched socks. He had just woken up.

“Sorry, did I wake you?” Derek asked, he didn’t want to start this morning off on Reid being rudely awoken. Reid nodded as he opened the door more, stepping forward the slightest bit. “Yeah, but it’s okay. What’s going on?” Reid was already aware of the plane situation, the whole team had been told last night, which forced Derek into making this last minute plan.

“Nothing- the team doesn’t have anything to do. Wanna go get breakfast?” Derek asked, trying to phrase his words and himself casually. He didn’t want Reid to get suspicious and back out. He just wanted answers from his best friend, that’s all.

Spencer rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before responding. “Okay, yeah. Let me go get changed.”

~

They arrived at an Ihop. It wasn’t anything special, but it was the nearest breakfast place to the hotel, so it worked for them. They were greeted by a hostess who showed them to a booth.

Spencer didn’t know why he agreed this this, he shouldn’t have. But in his half-awake and still somehow sleep deprived mind, breakfast seemed like a good idea. A great idea, in fact. But he now was anxious again. He didn’t want to deal with Melissa, call him scared, nonconfrontational, weak- whatever. He just didn’t want to have to deal with her. He enjoyed hanging out with Derek, but he knew if he did then it would be inevitable that he would end up facing her wrath again.

Almost immediately after the hostess showed them to their booth, their waiter appeared to take their orders. “Goodmorning, what can I get started for you two?” The older gentleman, whose name tag simply read “John” asked them.

“Just some coffee, please.” Derek ordered for the both of them. He knew what Spencer would want to order, and he also knew how bad Spencer was at conversing with people he wasn’t familiar enough with. John just nodded, saying a quick; “Comin’ right up!” Before walking off to leave them alone.

“Is the rest of the team coming?” Spencer asked as he stifled a yawn with his hand. Derek shook his head, “No, they all wanted to sleep in. Lucky I dragged you out of bed, though.” He joked, hoping to lighten the mood in the room. Spencer just smiled sheepishly for a moment before looking back down at the table.

They stayed quiet, which wasn’t unusual for the two, especially considering they were both still tired. But Derek didn’t want there to be silence, he wanted to talk about what was going on. “Reid-“ he started, but before he could continue his sentence, John was standing by the table with a pot of coffee. Derek and Spencer both wordlessly pushed their mugs over towards John, watching him fill them up with coffee in silence.

John finished pouring and stepped back, “I’ll give you folks some more time before ordering.” Derek just nodded at him, “That would be great, thank you.” And with that, their waiter was gone.

Reid was now focused on his mug of coffee, grabbing some sugar packets from the container on the table and ripping one open after another, before finally pouring it into his coffee. “How many sugars you plan on putting in there?” “Two.” “You’re already ripping open a third packet, Reid.”

“Oh.” Was all he said in response, Derek sighed, Spencer wasn’t acting right; he hadn’t for a while but this morning was peak Reid-being-weird, so Derek needed to take a stronger approach; “Reid. What’s wrong?”

“Hm? Nothing’s wrong.” Spencer said all too quickly to be believable. Derek rolled his eyes, watching the tired genius grab a spoon and stir his coffee with an intensity he never normally used. “That doesn’t work on me, man. We’re all profilers. I know when something’s up.” Spencer stayed quiet, still stirring his coffee with the spoon.

Reid didn’t want to be in this situation. He knew he should’ve hidden himself better, said and acted in different ways. Derek knew something was up, and Spencer couldn’t hide it forever. Especially not from him. He hated lying to Morgan.

“So..” Spencer spoke quietly, “What do you think is up?” Derek rolled his eyes at Spencer again, “Don’t talk to me like an unsub trying to stall. Somethings wrong. Did I do something- was it something I did or said?” Spencer put his spoon down as he watched Derek.

“I gotta be honest, Reid. I don’t know what’s going on here. We used to hangout so much, and suddenly you’re giving me the cold shoulder. I thought it was because of your studies- but you’ve done written whole thesesis while we’ve hungout. So it’s not you being busy with school. You make time. Why isn’t there any time now?” Derek kept going, voice raising in intensity as he got to the end.

Spencer wanted to say something, he wanted to say something so bad. But he didn’t know what. So instead he took a sip of his not-sweet-enough coffee. Derek watched him as he did so, intensity not wavering.

Spencer put the mug back down onto the table before he finally found his words, “It’s not you. You didn’t do anything.” “So what is it?” Morgan asked him almost instantly. Spencer sighed, he didn’t want to say it was Melissa. He couldn’t, he didn’t want to make Derek feel bad, he thought Derek was happy with her. He didn’t want to ruin that, even if Melissa was terrible. Derek was seemingly glad, and Spencer didn’t want him changing from positive to anything else (except somehow maybe more positive.)

“It’s nothing.” “It’s definitely not nothing, Reid. Please tell me.” Derek pried more. He couldn’t let this go. Spencer sighed, a weak sign of defeat. “Okay- but. I’m sorry. This involves Melissa.” He admitted, looking up to see Derek had a confused expression on his face. “What about her?” “When we went to the baseball game a few weeks ago and met her. She was really pleasant at first, but as soon as we were alone on the bleachers together she told me that I needed to stop being so close with you. And it really freaked me out, she saw me as a threat.”

Derek leaned back in the booth bench, unsure of what to do. “What did she say?” Derek finally asked after a moment, deciding he wanted to know what Melissa said to Spencer in full to make him act like this. Spencer didn’t deserve to be treated this way, he just didn’t. “I’m not going to-“ Spencer started, Derek just cut him off, “Yes you will. I know you remember what she said. So tell me. Please.”

Spencer fidgeted with the handle of the mug, “Okay, okay.. she said that you were her man and then she said, ‘I don’t need you confusing him and making him switch sides’...” Spencer spoke once more after that, before he could forget, “She also, um.. she said she would tell Garcia the same thing, except she didn’t because she knew she was with kevin.”

Derek stayed quiet, looking at Spencer before looking back down at his mug of coffee. Spencer stayed quiet, he didn’t know what he could say or do right now to make this better.

“I’m sorry.” Spencer finally decided to speak after it had been silent for a few minutes. “I didn’t want to tell you because you-“

Derek held his hand up as a simple gesture, indicating Spencer should be quiet. Spencer hushed up quickly, watching Morgan, who was sitting silently still, staring down with an intensity that could burn stronger than the sun. He stood up after a moment, pulling out his wallet and putting two twenty dollar bills down on the table, in front of Spencer. “For the coffee. Get some breakfast, too. I need to go.” “Derek, I-“ Spencer started, standing up, he wasn’t gonna leave Derek alone, especially to process this large amount of information. but he had started walking away, back turned to reid- leaving him alone at the booth. He wasn’t going to come back, and as much as Spencer wanted to follow him and never leave his side- he could tell he should leave him alone, at least for now.

~

After that whole experience, Spencer didn’t stay to get breakfast. He finished his coffee, paid, and left quickly. Deciding Derek needed space, and he wasn’t sure what else he could do, so he tucked tail back to the hotel. He lied to himself, saying maybe he could nap or watch T.V and ignore his imploding thoughts.

He couldn’t ignore his imploding thoughts, if that wasn’t painstakingly obvious. Spencer’s mind reeled from every aspect of their breakfast, to how he was curt and almost rude to Derek- he now wished he hadn’t been, but how else could he have acted? He didn’t know. He hated how things had went. He should’ve lied and told Derek he didn’t have the time for breakfast.

So, when Spencer finally got the hotel, he sat and thought and waited, waited for any sounds outside of his hotel door. Derek’s room was directly across the hall from his. So he waited for the sounds of the door opening, the beeping of the keycard, the sound of footsteps that were muffled by the soft carpet. Anything that would show Derek was back, back close to him, close enough to him for a conversation again. Because he knew that they needed to talk.

~

Spencer was counting. One hour and eighteen minutes passed before he heard any sounds of life that would match what he was waiting for. Namely, he heard the footsteps approach by his door, and then the beep of the keycard. And finally, the door opening and shutting quickly. Derek was there, he was back, Spencer got off his perch on the bed in record speed, exiting out to the hall and crossing quickly.

He was about to knock on the door, hand raised in the air, before he slowed himself down. Was this too much? What if Morgan didn’t want to talk to right now? What if Derek thought he was lying and was mad? Oh god, that terrified Spencer. He hoped Derek knew he wasn’t lying, he could run any behavior test he wanted to, but he wouldn’t lie to Derek. Not now, not ever.

Spencer still had his hand raised in the air, standing directly in front of the door. If Derek thought he was lying, he would prove he wasn’t. Nothing mattered right now, Spencer decided as he took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

Spencer heard movement from inside the room, before Derek opened the door. He looked stressed, the lines in his face were hard set, this was how he looked when he dealt with an unsub. This isn’t how he should be looking on a day off. Derek said nothing as he looked at Spencer, “Can we talk?” Spencer asked him after it was clear Derek wasn’t going to start talking.

Derek nodded. Wordlessly opening the door more, and stepping back to allow Reid inside. He stepped in, Derek’s room was a mirror copy of Spencer’s, simple and small. He had his duffel sat on the floor by the small twin bed provided by the hotel.

Reid stood in the room, Derek moved past him to sit down on the edge of the bed as Spencer messed with some loose thread on his jacket, “I, um... I got your change..” Spencer started, reaching into his pocket and pulling out the wad of cash and coins. He wasn’t sure what to say now that he was inside Derek’s room. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, so he wasn’t sure how to prepare. Derek wasn’t acting like himself, so he didn’t know what would work.

Spencer went to hand it back to him, “Reid, no.” Derek started, causing Spencer to stop in his tracks, holding the money in silence.

“You didn’t come here for that.” Derek motioned to the money with his hand. “No. I didn’t.” Spencer mumbled awkwardly, shoving it back into his jacket pocket, the coins clinking together all too loudly for his liking.

“I’m sorry.” Derek sighed after a moment, “I shouldn’t have ran off like that. It’s just- I couldn’t believe what you were saying.” Spencer nodded, he wanted to say so much to Derek. He wanted to say, “I swear on my mother I am not lying”, he wanted to say “I’m sorry, I should have stayed quiet” he wanted to say “I care about you so much and I don’t want to see you walk away, I don’t want to lose you”. But Spencer couldn’t talk, he wasn’t sure what would come out if he spoke.

“I, uh, I called Melissa.” Derek told him, “After I left. I called her, I asked her if she said that to you, and she said she didn’t say it like that,” He took a breath before continuing on, “I asked her what she meant, because she wasn’t denying what she said. She just was saying the wording was off.”

Spencer found his small, awkward voice, deciding to look down at the floor instead of Derek. He was scared of what he would see. “What did she say the wording was?” He asked Derek, “She said she was harsher than that, told you to back off. Then she tried to explain herself, as if any of what she did was acceptable and could be fine under the disguise of caring for your significant other.”

“Reid, look at me. Please.” Derek sighed, not continuing whatever else he was going to say. Spencer finally looked up to meet his eyes. Derek just looked tired, leaning awkwardly on the couch, as he kept his gaze on Spencer.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause this.” Spencer apologized, he had no clue if he needed to. But it felt like what he had to do.

“No, don’t.” Derek shook his head, as if to knock the apology out of his brain. “Thank you for telling me. Thank you. The red flags were there, Reid. And there were so many. I was just ignoring them.”

Spencer stayed quiet, watching Derek as he admitted this out loud; “I just- I wanted to make it work. But the fact she said that to you, and was gonna tell garcia, I just-“ Derek shook his head again, a mixture of defeat and anger simultaneously now instead of a signal for reid to stop.

“It upset me. I couldn’t believe it. So I called her and that happened and... and...” Derek trailed off, sighing simply as if that was the end of the sentence.

“...You broke up?” Spencer asked carefully, not wanting to misjudge. Derek nodded, rubbing his face with both hands. He was stressed. Spencer could tell.

“We did. It’s for the best. I can’t be dating someone who is like that. Especially not to you, or Garcia. That’s the biggest deal breaker out there.” Derek spoke, he was still serious but he was also sort of joking in a way to help calm the atmosphere down.

Spencer didn’t respond right away, instead moving to sit down on the edge of the bed, a few feet away from Morgan to give him plenty space. Derek didn’t like that, pulling on Spencer’s hand and motioning him to sit directly by his side.

Spencer complied, but cursed his face for causing a blush to form. This wasn’t the time to savor the feeling of Derek’s strong grip on his hand. It wasn’t.

Spencer was now sat down next to Derek, he wasn’t sure what else to say, so he stayed quiet. But he knew he didn’t want to leave Derek’s side now. He needed to be here. It couldn’t be easy for Derek.

“I’m sorry I left you at the restaurant.” Derek spoke after a while of them sitting side by side. “It’s okay,” Spencer told him, Derek gave him a sideways glance that proved he didn’t believe what he was saying.

“I didn’t end up having breakfast, though. I was worried.” Spencer admitted. Derek let out a low chuckle, and god, Spencer loved that sound. When was the last time he heard it? It used to be as common as hearing traffic in downtown Quantico, but as of lately; he hadn’t heard it often. Spencer knew in the back of his head, it was probably Melissa. Small things had changed with Derek during their time of dating.

First, it was calling Spencer “pretty boy”, and Garcia “baby girl”. Derek stopped saying it, and as much as garcia was worried about him, Derek had assured her he was okay. (Spencer didn’t mind the nickname stopping, as he finally didn’t have to come up with an excuse every time he blushed in front of the team when Derek would call him that.)

But then, Derek showed up to work looking tired, and sure- the job took long hours and restless nights and way too many coffee breaks. But he looked like he was losing that energy in his eyes. The excitement that made him join the team. He had told Spencer it was originally he missed Melissa. But now, Spencer was second guessing that.

Things had slowly changed with Derek, so small that Spencer didn’t even notice fully. But if you looked at all the reasons why he changed, it could be tied back to Melissa.

Good riddance. Spencer thought to himself. In ordinary situations, he would hate to think that, but today he didn’t; as he heard Derek’s soft, low chuckle. He didn’t want to ever stop see Derek being himself. He wouldn’t stop him from anything, he knew he wouldn’t. All he would want to do is care about him, kiss him, fall asleep in his arms, have a nice dinner with him- things a real boyfriend would do.

He would let Derek be himself, he wouldn’t stop him from working, he wouldn’t want to fight, he wouldn’t want to play games, and god knows he wouldn’t stop Derek and Garcia flirting. That’s what kept them happy, together, and secure.

“I’m sorry you guys broke up, but if it’s any consolation. You belong with someone better.” Spencer admitted, not adding on the last part he always wanted to say. If he could say it, lord knows he would. But he couldn’t tell Derek they belonged together. He sounded insane.

Derek softy bumped shoulders with him in an act of thanks, “Thank you. Now c’mon, let’s go get you some real breakfast, pretty boy.” He said as he stood up, the blush immediately rushed back into Spencer’s face. God, that name would be the death of him. He was seriously going to die like this.

“You still got my change? ‘Cause you’re paying.” Derek joked with him as he turned to pull on his coat, “It’s your money, why don’t I give it back to you?” Spencer asked him, the conversation now changing to a much lighter tone. Derek shrugged, “You paying a cashier will help your people skills. Now c’mon, I saw a good restaurant with outdoor seating that’s by a garden. You can give me plant facts while we eat.”

~

“...Oh, I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night. I’m the one who makes you laugh when you know you’re ‘bout to cry. And I know your favorite songs and you tell me ‘bout your dreams. Think I know where you belong, think I know it’s with me...”

~

Derek’s growing love for Spencer Reid was so slow he didn’t realize it until it was bursting out of his chest. It wasn’t obvious, it wasn’t, at least not to Derek. But suddenly it was everything Spencer did, it had his attention and captivated his thoughts. If Spencer was rambling about something, Derek would listen. Even if he didn’t care, even if he was tired, or hungry, or even mad.

To put it simply, it was every single thing that Spencer had ever done for him, suddenly making Derek feel something. It was every little funny thing Spencer did, it was every factoid he spat out to the team at the round table, it was how he was there for everyone in less than a second if needed, it was how Spencer complained about modern television, it was how Spencer grumbled in his sleep when they had to wake him up to get off the team’s jet after a long case. It was everything.

Every one of those instances just made something inside Derek squirm. Before, when Derek was dating Melissa- he was able to hold that feeling at bay. But it had now been months since his and Melissa’s breakup, and he had nothing to stop his mind from thinking about Reid, so the feelings and thoughts about the genius only grew stronger.

He thought about him nonstop. About how Reid was precious, amazing, handsome, smart, and god- he was borderline perfect. And what had originally started as a small inkling feeling inside of him was growing, growing into something almost unmanageable. It took everything in Derek not to just lean over and grab the genius’ hand as he was waving it around when speaking about something he was passionate about, and holding it tightly.

It was getting worse, day by day it was hell at work. But it was the best suffering in the world. Seeing Spencer sat at his desk, deep in thought as he typed reports out, along with emailing scientists and doctors on the side. God, Reid was an absolute genius. Morgan wasn’t sure if he could easily get over that fact anymore as he used to. Now Spencer’s smarts had more meaning, and he wasn’t sure why.

Spencer’s smarts always mattered, and definitely came in handy for the team, saving their asses more than once. But now, his IQ level was something Derek caught himself almost worrying about.

Spencer wouldn’t ever say it, but what if he thought Derek was stupid? The brawn to his brain. Nothing more than a dude to tackle the bad guys and handcuff them down. What if Spencer thought he wasn’t a good person, a good friend?

Now, along with the growing admiration, he also had growing fear. Derek was now going back and forth between doubting himself and wanting nothing more than pulling Spencer into a janitors closet and kissing him until they needed air.

Yeah, Derek was screwed. Work was painful. But he wouldn’t stop, he couldn’t. Even if he wanted to, he kept going along, because every day he saw Reid that feeling inside him only grew, and he didn’t have the willpower to stop it, and even if he did- he probably couldn’t. This was the strongest he had ever felt in a long time. It would take an army to stop how he felt (and even then, he might still beat the army).

~

The night it all went down wasn’t what derek intended it to be, he was pretty much planning on hiding his crush on reid to the grave, not admitting it to anyone ever about how he felt. Because as Derek saw it, Spencer was too smart for him. Definitely out of his league.

Because in Morgan’s mind, how dumb could he be? He had been slowly falling in love with his best friend, all while not even realizing it- and dating someone who was absolutely horrid during that entire process. It was enough to make him smack his head against his wall.

~

Derek was working late the night it happened, going over this same dilemma in his head as he finished up the last of his reports to turn over to Hotch.

Nothing was happening in the bullpen, and for the first time in forever, Spencer had left before the work day ended. He had been complaining of a stomachache, and Rossi had smartly deduced he was sick, and even though Reid didn’t want to leave- the team all but kicked him out the door, telling him he wasn’t any good working when feeling like vomiting.

Derek had missed him since he left, he felt stupid admitting that, but it was the plain and simple truth. His days were just better with Reid, and there was no other explanation than that. As stupid as it was, Derek had come to agree with that fact a while ago, and now it was just normal, him missing Reid. But thankfully Reid didn’t leave often enough for it to be bad.

That being said, Derek still worried. Deciding to call Reid, it was only 7 p.m., after all. Surely Reid was still awake.

His cell phone ringed as Derek held it up to his ear, twirling his pen absentmindedly between his index and pointer finger as he waited for Spencer to answer.

And he did, he sounded groggy, but he answered; “Hello?” “Hey, Reid.” Derek spoke, a small stupid smile creeping its way into his face. “How are you feeling?” He asked, he heard Spencer shuffling on the other end of the line, then the faucet running.

“I’m okay... just really dizzy now, so I got myself some water.” “Did you eat enough today?” Derek asked him, changing tones from a concerned friend to something more.

“Yes, I did. You don’t need to worry about my eating.” Reid said simply, he wasn’t the type of guy who liked being watched over. Derek understood why, but this was still necessary.

“Reid, c’mon now. When was the last time you ate?”

“11:23 a.m., Garcia gave me a muffin.” Spencer admitted after a beat of silence, “Reid, you’ve been not eating for almost eight hours- no wonder you felt so sick, man!” Derek said into the phone as he stood up, shrugging his jacket onto his shoulders, deciding to leave now. The reports were almost done, anyway.

“Well, I’m not hungry so it’s fine..” Reid argued weakly in response, “Oh no, no. Don’t even, Spencer. I’m getting you food and taking it to your place. Now go lay down and take some tylenol, drink that water you got.”

Spencer huffed weakly, but made no move to argue or protest Morgan inviting himself over. “Fine. Please get me chicken noodle soup.”

~

As agreed, Derek got Spencer some chicken noodle soup from a great nearby deli Spencer had told him about a while ago. Derek was proud of himself for this choice in food, even if Spencer had requested soup, he hadn’t requested where. And Derek felt smart for remembering one of Spencer’s favorite places.

Derek arrived to Spencer’s apartment, the door was left unlocked so he came in, carrying the container of soup in both of his hands, so he pushed the front door shut gently with his foot.

“Hey, Reid. I’m here,” he called out into the apartment, as he made his way to the bedroom, finding a sleeping Spencer on the bed, covered in a few miscellaneous blankets to keep him warm.

Derek sat the container of soup onto the nearby bedside table, next to spencer’s near empty water glass, before looking down at reid.

Spencer was perfect, regardless if he was awake or asleep. But asleep he was so peaceful, so calm. Derek could so easily keep Spencer safe from everything in his sleep, hold him in his arms and help ground him. He knew Spencer got nightmares, everyone on the team did. But he knew if he was there, he could help, he could make it better.

Spencer was breathing softly, his face looked slightly flushed, and his hair was all over the place, some strands had fallen onto his face directly, which Derek gently pushed out of the way to get a better look at Spencer.

“Mmm..” Spencer mumbled in his sleep, a response to Derek touching him, Derek took a sharp breath in. God, he wanted to just tell Spencer right now he felt, he so badly did. And Spencer was asleep, what was stopping him? He could say it and Spencer wouldn’t remember. Because unlike conscious Spencer, unconscious Spencer didn’t remember things.

So before his brain could catch up to his body, he did. “I love you.” He told Spencer softly, it was barely above a whisper. It was so quiet he was sure Spencer didn’t hear it at all, but it was just Derek’s unfortunate luck that Spencer started to stir.

“Hm?” He asked, sitting up slowly, Derek pulled his hand away from where he had tucked the strand of hair away.

“I said, I brought you soup.” Derek lied easily, hoping that “I love you” and “I brought you soup” were interchangeable sounding sentences. Spencer just nodded, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes slowly as he turned to look at the container on his bedside table

He didn’t suspect anything, Derek let a breath of relief out internally as Spencer reached for the container. “It didn’t come with a spoon, so I’ll go get you one.” Derek told him, getting up to go back into Spencer’s kitchen and grab a spoon from the silverware drawer.

When Derek came back, Spencer was more awake, holding the container of soup in his hands expectantly as he waited. Derek handed him the spoon wordlessly, before sitting down on the bed next to Spencer. “How are you feeling?” Derek asked him, as Spencer hadn’t tried out the soup yet (he was waiting for it to cool a bit more.) “Tired- sorry I left, by the way.” Reid responded slowly, he still felt the tiniest bit groggy.

Derek shook his head, “No Reid, don’t apologize. Are you feeling any better?” Spencer nodded slowly in response, starting to stir the soup to help it cool down. Derek watched him, the soft light from the only lamp on in the room casted off shadows throughout the walls and onto Spencer. He looked beautiful, even if he was wearing pajamas and his hair was messy and he was stirring his soup while half awake.

To Derek, he looked perfect. And once again, Derek’s body moved too fast for his brain to catch up with. He was suddenly talking; “Reid, can I tell you something?” He asked the tired genius, who just nodded and gave an “Mhm” sound in return as he continued to stir his soup.

Derek breathed in, he couldn’t go back. It was now or never. He turned to face Spencer, and if he hated him after this, so be it.

“I was an idiot, Spencer. When I was with Melissa, searching for a good moment to stay happy about was rare. But the entire time I’ve known you, everything’s been a good moment. Every opportunity I’ve had with you has let me grow and become smarter, and a better person..” he took a second to look back at Spencer, who was now looking at him with an expression he couldn’t read.

“But I’ve still been stupid. Because the entire time I was with her, I only looked forward to being with you. I missed the best thing right in front of me, and I hope you know that I am not normally this dense... but..” this was the hardest part of his whole speech, how the fuck was he supposed to admit something like this?

“But,” he started again, “I like you, Reid. I really like you. This entire time I was chasing the wrong person and following dead leads, like a rookie on a new case. But I realize the only person that makes me feel anything is you- and... I think, I- no. I am. I am falling for you. And I don’t even know if you like guys but-“ It was by this point Spencer put his soup down back on his bedside table, the soft sound shut Derek up easily.

“You’re falling for me?” Spencer asked, just simply clarifying what he had said. Morgan nodded, standing by it. “Yes. I am.”

Spencer breathed out a sigh of relief, something Derek hadn’t expected him to do. “You aren’t stupid... I- um. I’ve been falling for you too.”

That made Derek light up instantly, “You have?” Spencer nodded sheepishly, staring down at his fingernails instead of Derek. “I wasn’t expecting you to...” Spencer mumbled, as if that was a sufficient enough explanation on his part on why he was relieved and surprised.

“It just snuck up on me. I can’t get you out of my head, you’re all I want.” Derek admitted, more brashly than he would’ve liked to phrased things. But that didn’t seem to bother Spencer at all, as he started to lean forward slowly, Derek leaned forward too, reaching up to put his hand on the side of Spencer’s face to help him stay steady. Their lips were inches apart, but Spencer spoke. “Derek, I want to kiss you so bad. But if I’m sick I don’t want to risk infecting you-“

“Pretty boy, I’m breathing your air already. And I don’t think you have the flu, just low blood sugar.” Derek told him, which quickly shushed Reid up. They leaned forward more, and all the feelings of angst and dread that had built up between the two disintegrated as their lips touched slowly.

It was a soft kiss, a chaste one. But there definitely was passion behind it. Morgan stayed close to Spencer, resting his forehead against his.

“I belong with you...” Derek mumbled, he didn’t care if Spencer heard it anymore. He should hear it, he deserved to hear it. He deserved to know he was the only one Derek wanted.

Spencer pulled back, a small smile playing on his lips the entire time. “I can’t believe it...” he mumbled to Derek after a moment. “You should. You said it yourself, I belong with someone better. And it’s you. I just hope you agree.” Derek told him honestly, not leaving anything he said to chance. Spencer nodded, “Yes- you belong with me. Absolutely, yes. I agree.”

Derek smiled, pushing a loose strand of hair back behind spencer’s ear, before leaning forward and planting a soft kiss on Spencer’s forehead. “You eat that soup, I’ll go get you some more water.”

———————————————————————

[vroomvroommuppett]

requests / tag list

• = angst

* = smut

^ = fluff

+ = requested

> = author favorite

criminal minds

aaron hotchner

domesticity with aaron and jack ^+

pregnancy (baufem!reader) ^>

the gray sweatpants *^>

spencer reid

derek morgan

the gray sweatpants *^>

luke alvez

matt simmons

ralvez

getting together ^+

hotchreid

nsfw *^+

first date +^

ask game ^+

first kiss ^+

team finds out ^+

moreid

pining +^

brooklyn 99

jake peralta

[abortionado]

Can you please write moreid #3 from the fluff or 12 from misc?

Sorry this took me so long! This sort of prompt (not depressing or horny) is not what I’m used to writing, so it was kind of a challenge. I hope you like it! (Set during S1. Long as hell for absolutely no reason. Not NSFW, but warning for adult themes.)

Spencer wakes up as soon as the sun’s flush has spread to the center of the sky.

For a fraction of a second, before he’s opened his eyes, he’s certain he’s at home. Then, for an even smaller increment, he’s half-awake and confused at the unfamiliar angles at which the light fills his peripherals. 

Then, then, once his brain has fully rejoined him on planet Earth, then he remembers. 

Holy shit. 

Holy shit. 

Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid, Spencer. 

Sleeping with your coworker?

Stupid.

Think. 

He’s still asleep. 

Carefully, as if he’s diffusing a bomb, Spencer removes Morgan’s (heavy, good Lord, what does this guy lift?) arm from where it’s draped across his chest and sits upright. He keeps every muscle in his body tense in an effort to keep as still as possible. 

Twelve and a half feet from here to the door, clothes five feet three inches left of the door.

Will take me two minutes to dress. My legs are three feet and four inches long. My strides are four feet and five inches on average.

Sixteen stairs. 

Six and a half inches each.

It should take him, he reasons, about four minutes and some change to dress himself and get out the front door, as long as he makes exceptionally good time and manages to dodge distractions. (He doesn’t want to seem too eager, after all, hanging around the house the morning after--he doesn’t want Morgan to know just how much this matters to him.)

As soon as Spencer shifts his weight, though, he realizes how sore the previous night had rendered him, and he tries to adjust his calculations for limping.

Six minutes? Eight?

He’s not sure. 

He’s not sure of anything right now.

God, he hates being unsure. 

Painstakingly slowly, Spencer climbs out of bed and tiptoes over to the corner of the room where his clothes had been carelessly discarded the night before. 

(He finds that he almost doesn’t want to put them back on. He feels as though he’s somehow a changed person.)

For just a moment, as he’s wrestling his jeans on, Spencer pauses to drink in the domestic tranquility laid out before him. The sun has risen in full, and its gentle morning rays are slipping in defined slates through the blinds covering the window above the bed. Derek Morgan is passed out with his back to the corner of the room where Spencer is standing. Even from behind, everything about the older man seems regal, somehow; unnaturally beautiful, like he was created by something far more powerful than a man and a woman. His shoulder blades, the curvature of his spine, his medium-dark complexion that almost seems to glow in the sunlight--it’s all perfect. His back is scratched up, and it’s with genuine surprise that Spencer realizes he must’ve done that. 

Reluctantly, he tears his eyes away and turns to face the wall as he gets dressed.

Four and a half minutes with NO DISTRACTIONS.

No distractions.

Don’t get distracted.

Don’t get--

“What’re you doing?” Morgan calls from behind him, voice thick with sleep.

Shit. 

Spencer pivots quickly around, heart hammering, still holding his shirt in his left hand. “I was j—uh—I was just…leaving…?” 

Morgan frowns. “I drove you here.”

“I was…gonna take the metro.” 

“Uh-uh.” He yawns and sits up. “What kinda douchebag do you think I am? I’m not gonna fuck you and let you take the train home.” 

“Morgan, I can—”

“Hey. Call me Derek, okay?” 

“Derek, I can get myself home. It’s really not a problem.”

“It is a problem. I’ll make you breakfast. C’mon.” His face softens a bit. “Please?”

It occurs to Spencer, then, that he might actually be wanted here. He entertains the thought (doesn’t cling to it, but allows it to pass by without shooting it down) that Morgan - Derek, whatever - actually wants to make him breakfast, and isn’t just doing it out of obligation or because he feels bad for him. It’s an unfamiliar (though certainly not unwelcome) feeling-- being truly wanted is a dopamine rush he hasn’t felt in years.

Spencer nods, trying his best not to grin like a lovesick teenage girl. “Okay. Sure, I can stay for breakfast.” 

… 

Spencer’s never been good at sitting still, and it’s ten times worse when he’s nervous. 

The atmosphere of the kitchen is not tense--that’s not the right way to describe it, because Derek certainly doesn’t seem tense, humming to himself as he flips pancakes and the dusty, familiar smell of the heat turning on fills the room--but Spencer is certainly tense. He hadn’t grabbed his shirt when he’d come downstairs, having been thrown off of his groove by Derek asking him to stay for breakfast, and he’s self-conscious and cold. He bounces his leg up and down idly and wrings his hands in his lap.

Sleeping with your coworker, he thinks, over and over and over. Stupid.

“Do you mind if I go look at your pictures?” He eventually asks, gesturing towards the framed photos on the wall in the living room. 

“Not at all. These’ll be done in--actually, I’ll come in there.” 

As Spencer stands up, he absentmindedly grabs a gray hoodie draped across the back of one of the kitchen chairs and tugs it over his head. It’s warm, soft, and smells like Derek. 

He never wants to take it off.

Morgan’s living room is painted a pale blue color. The couch and coffee table sit a foot and a half apart. There’s a brown, circular rug (almost exactly six feet in diameter, Spencer notes) in the center of the floor. The walls are lined with photographs; side-by-side portraits of two pretty young women who Spencer recognizes as Derek’s sisters, a photo of Derek in front of some sort of waterfall with his arm around a slim, pretty brunette woman (which sparks an irrational jealousy that Spencer swallows as best he can), and a small framed photo of a group of people which looks to have been taken with a disposable camera. 

Spencer moves in to get a closer look.

“Is this JJ on your wall here?”

“In the group picture with the unit?” Morgan calls. “Yeah. We look a lot younger there, huh?”

Spencer smiles. “You do. I didn’t even recognize Gideon. What year was this?”  

“That was...‘98? ‘99? JJ’s first year. Probably my favorite year with the BAU yet.” 

His favorite year ever was before I was there, Spencer realizes with a twinge of sadness.

“That was before we got the jet,” Derek continues. “Man, you don’t know the struggle. We used to fly commercial. Get split up and sat next to randos. But that was before 9/11, so...hey, did you see my hoodie anywhere? I swear I set down in here somewhere.” 

Spencer’s smile fades. He balls his fists within the too-long sleeves of Derek’s missing hoodie. Fuck. 

God, he’s so bad at these things. 

He’s almost never sure in advance exactly where other people draw the lines of their comfort zones, but he can always tell once he’s overstepped them, and standing here at eight o’clock in the morning in his coworker’s living room, bare-chested beneath his hoodie, sore between the legs and staring at his family photos, he knows for sure that he’s overstepped. He’s gotten too comfortable.

Spencer reaches to pull the garment off. “Uh, I…”

“You’re wearing it, aren’t you?”

“I’m not, I--”

Derek chuckles. “You’re super cute. I’ll be out there in one sec.” 

..

Honestly, the fact that Derek regularly has two kinds of syrup (maple and blueberry) in his house is extremely intimidating. 

Spencer’s spent most of his life around older people, and, though he certainly never feels left behind intellectually, there are occasional jarring moments when he realizes just how immature he is in comparison to his peers. This is one of these times; he feels adolescent and ridiculous looking around Morgan’s fully-furnished, Real Adult living room, thinking about how he probably has a mortgage and a spice cabinet and a swiffer mop. 

(Two kinds of syrup--really? Spencer doesn’t even have ice cubes. Maybe it’s time for him to grow up and get an ice tray.)

“Did you know that the profitable blueberry season in South America directly follows the profitable blueberry season in North America, almost to the day?” Spencer asks, nervously dragging his forkful of pancake through his puddle of blueberry syrup. He’s hardly eaten. He’s too uneasy. “On the day that the average North American blueberry farmer’s profits decline to zero, the average South American blueberry farmer’s spike. Now, this is partly just because of demand, of course, but the fact that it’s so exact--”

“Spence?” Morgan interrupts.

He mentally kicks himself. “Sorry.”

“Hey, no. Don’t be sorry. Listen, uh...do you think I could maybe...take you out...sometime?”

Spencer frowns. “What do you mean?”

“Snipe you. No. What do you think? To dinner or something.”

(If Spencer didn’t know any better, he’d almost think Derek looked nervous. He’s biting his lower lip--it’s a classic anxiety tell. Sometimes, Spencer really wishes he wasn’t a profiler.)

“...Why?”

“Why?” Morgan repeats. “Because I like you.”

Spencer’s stomach turns over. “You do?”

“Isn’t that what I said?”

“...Do you really mean that?” (His heart hammers. He wonders, for a moment, if this is some kind of cruel joke, like the ones kids used to play on him in high school.)

“What? Of course I mean it.”

“Do you do this with everyone? I mean, everyone who…?”

“No.” 

It’s difficult for Spencer to comprehend; he almost can’t wrap his head around the idea that someone so gorgeous and widely beloved and well-put-together would want anything at all to do with him, let alone this. “Then why is this time different?”

“Because you’re different. I’ve never met anyone like you in my life. Look, can I take you out, or not?”

Spencer locks eyes with Derek and raises his forkful of pancake (now completely saturated with blueberry syrup) to his lips. He’s not quite sure if the overwhelming, comfortable warmth he feels is from the heat, Derek’s hoodie, or the affection he feels bubbling up inside him at the prospect of a date, but he finds that he doesn’t really care. 

“I’d like that.”

[rxseinbloom]

Masterlist!!

I’ll update as I go, feel free to send me requests! I’m super excited to get into writing more, especially for the CM fandom. 

Criminal Minds

Works

* indicates nsfw

Whiskey * (M, Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid) — fwb, canon-adjacent, WIP 2/6 chapters completed!

Fluff

So Alright, Cool, Whatever (T, Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid) -- Spencer and the BAU team play a tipsy game of Never Have I Ever, chaos ensues 

Rhythm (T, Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid) -- Spencer can’t sleep, and Morgan comforts him. 

North (T, Derek Morgan x Spencer Reid) — Spencer is terrified of thunderstorms.

Angst

Canon-compliant

AU

Blurbs/Headcanons

Spencer Reid Should’ve Canonically Been Autistic And I’ll Die Mad About It

Spencer Reid x Derek Morgan

Domestic Moreid Headcanons

Angst :(

Morning Routine

NSFW Requests

Part One* Part Two* Part Three* Part Four*

BAU Family

Headcanons 1

[spencers-renaissance]

Fic Rec Friday

We're back to posting fic recs on friday now that Rain is a Chance to be Touched is completed, folks! (Although when posting starts for my new moreid multi-chap in a couple of weeks we will be returning to Thursdays) I have LOVED getting back into CM fics this past week so I have some real gems to share with you today! Enjoy :)

7 Fics

⭐️Memory, Ephemeral by a_little_chai - 4.1k, 1ch, Gen/Platonic Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid, Canon Divergence, Episode: s03e16 Elephant's Memory, Gay Spencer Reid, Coming Out, Homophobia, Slurs, Autistic Spencer Reid, Stimming, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort TW: Implied/Referenced Drug use & Implied/Referenced Child Abuse

"I hope she was worth it." Rossi said, taking a sip of his coffee. Morgan joined in, a smile on his face. "I hope it was a she." (An episode-AU of 3x16, wherein Reid is gay and his sexuality played a large part in the bullying he endured when he was younger. Morgan's comment hits a bit too close to home.)

💄Pretty Boy by @izzymrdb - 3k, 1ch, Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid, Alternate Universe, Sugar Daddy Aaron Hotchner, Sugar Baby Spencer Reid, Sex Worker Spencer Reid, Getting Together, Domestic Fluff, Idiots in Love

Sex Worker Spencer Reid finds a sugar daddy in Aaron Hotchner

🍓when you can't find your way, i'll find my way to you by @cabotism - 1.4k, 1ch, Elle Greenway/Jennifer Jareau, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Comfort, First Kiss, Getting Together

JJ questions what she’s doing at the BAU

4 more fics (gen, hotchgan, ralvez, moreid) & my recent fics under the cut!!

☕️Coffee by Nkala99 - 3.2k, 1ch, Gen/The BAU Team & Spencer Reid, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Team as Family, Allergic Reaction, Protective Team, Hurt Spencer Reid

“This coffee tastes weird.” “That’s probably because it’s not coffee.”

🏥balls fair in love and war by @hotchley - 5.6k, 1ch, Aaron Hotchner/Derek Morgan, Fluff, Light Angst, Hurt Aaron Hotchner, Alternate Universe, Pining Aaron Hotchner, Happy Ending, Team as Family

a cm teacher au, in which emily hits hotch in the head with a netball, and derek is the doctor that treats him

🪞Reflections by SHINee64 - 1.5k, 1ch, Luke Alvez/Spencer Reid, Soulmate AU, Getting Together, Hurt Spencer Reid

Reid has grown up with a reflection of his soulmate beside him. Every day, Spencer tried his best to keep his gaze away from windows, blank screens, even particularly still puddles when he was caught out in the rain. Anything reflective.

🐝And The Rest, He Left Unsaid by @fruitygnf - 2.4k, 1ch, Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Gideon Bashing, Canon Divergence, Post-Episode: S04E24 Amplification, Aphasia, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Angst, Hurt Spencer Reid, Protective Derek Morgan

Following his brush with anthrax, Spencer’s aphasia lasts three months. Derek stays his side—so close that it kicks his crush into overdrive. So does the rest of his team, but Gideon? Gideon’s a different story.

My Recent Fics

❤️‍🩹a touch that never hurts - 1.7k, 1ch, Gen/Platonic Aaron Hotchner & Spencer Reid, Aftermath of Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Spencer Reid, Protective Aaron Hotchner, Protective Derek Morgan, Platonic Cuddling, Fluff, Hospitals, Whump, Dad Hotch, Spencer Reid Needs a Hug, Angst

A rewrite of the Tobias Hankel aftermath, in which Spencer gets plenty of cuddles and physical affection from his father figure

🏳️‍🌈A Complete History of the Complexities of Queer Identity - 4.1k, 1ch, Luke Alvez/Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan & Spencer Reid, Homophobia, Friendship, Coming Out, Relationship Reveal, Insecure Spencer Reid, Hurt/Comfort, Protective Derek Morgan, Protective Luke Alvez, Secret Relationship, Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Outsider POV, AU - Different First Meeting

Another ralvez relationship reveal fic, this time heavily focusing on why Spencer hasn't told his best friend about Luke

🍫chocolate - 945w, 1ch, Penelope Garcia/Emily Prentiss, Parenthood, Moms Emily & Penelope, Fluff, Slice of Lice, Family Fluff, Cuddling & Snuggling, Married Emily & Penelope

Emily comes home from her trip to the store to find her wife and her newborn cuddling in the armchair.

🥂Embarrassed - 1.2k, 1ch, Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Getting Together, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Drinking Games, Embarrassed Spencer Reid, Hurt Spencer Reid, Misunderstandings, First Kiss

A misunderstanding at a BAU get together has Spencer embarrassed and a long-awaited kiss finally happening.

taglist: @criminalmindsvibez @suburban--gothic @takeyourleap-of-faith @negativefouriq @makaylajadewrites @iamrenstark @livrere-blue @hotchseyebrows @reidology @spencerspecifics @bau-gremlin @ @marsjareau @garcias-bitch @oliverbrnch @physics-magic @sbeno22 @im-autistic @anxious-enby @kuolonsyoja @reidreids @ropoto @thosecriminalminds @cmily @lesbiantodds @notevanbuckley @thebipolarbisexualnerd (add yourself to my taglist!!)

[writing-in-april]

Request Guidlines

Masterlist - please read some of my works before requesting

Requests are open. I write for a myriad of different characters so feel free to request anyone you'd like to see! I do not write real person fics only for characters that actors and actresses portray. I write NSFW, if you are under 18 please don't read them and also do not interact with this blog. I do x female x male and x gender neutral readers so feel free to request any of them! I prefer to make most of my fluff gender neutral if possible for the story arc so we can all enjoy it together! When submitting a request please don’t be overly vague otherwise I will reject without a response. Please don't give me a duplicate request unless stated before hand, it can be quite obvious if you do us writers talk to each other! Also I reserve the right to reject any request- sometimes they just don’t inspire me. I will almost always respond if I reject a request unless it doesn’t fall under my guidelines. I also take some time to finish requests as I am very busy in my day to day life.

All requests I answer are tagged #requests Any requests I accept will be tagged #accepted requests Any completed requests will be tagged #completed request Any rejected requests will be tagged #rejected request

Actors/Actresses I write for/want to write for:(based off of the works I’ve published, list will expand as I write more)

1) Matthew Gray Gubler: Spencer Reid, Franklin (Beginner’s luck), Raymond Wadsworth (Suburban Gothic), Chip Taylor (68 Kill)

2) Oscar Isaac: Poe Dameron, Santiago ‘pope’ Garcia (Triple Frontier), Nathan Bateman (Ex Machina), Blue Jones (Sucker Punch), Laurent (In secret), Llewyn Davis (Inside Llewyn Davis)

3) Pedro Pascal: Din Darin (The Mandalorian), Javier Peña (Narcos), Frankie Morales (Triple Frontier), Oberyn Martell (Game of Thrones), Ezra (Prospect), Pero Tovar (The Great Wall)

4) Tom Holland: Arvin Russell (The Devil All the Time)

Ships I will not write for:

MGG:

Spencer Reid: Moreid (blocked tag), Heid, Jeid, Spencer x Maeve, Spencer x Penelope

Oscar Isaac:

Poe Dameron: Rey x Poe (for some reason the ship name escapes me)

Pedro Pascal:

Din Djarin: Din x Cara

Hard NOs ⚠️ (this is subject to change)

Domestic Violence (specifically enacted on the reader)

Non-con (I will write consensual non con or dub con)

Extreme Food play (If you want an example on my limits for writing this kink read Georgia Peach- I won’t write food more extreme than this)

Stalker fics

Yandere

Soulmate AUs (Sorry guys it’s not me thing)

Any bodily fluid play besides spit and cum (some blood is fine but only a little- read Helping Hands if you want to get a good idea on my limits for it)

that’s it for now but I’m sure I’ll expand the list

[teaforopenerss]

Tag(?

So uhh... Idk how this goes I don’t really know how to use tumblr xDDD.

Tagged by the cool @reidology

slow burn or love at first sight // fake dating or secret dating // enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers (HOW CAN YOU CHOOSE ONE WHEN THERE’S CHERIK AND THERE’S MOREID??) // there’s only one bed or long distance correspondence // hurt/comfort or amnesia // fantasy au or modern au // mutual pining or domestic bliss // smut or fluff // canon compliant or fix it // reincarnation or character death // one shot or multi chapter // kid fic or road trip fic // arranged marriage or accidental marriage // high school romances or middle aged romances  // time travel or isolated together // neighbours or roommates (AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES) // sci-fi au or magic au // angst or crack // apocalyptic or mundane

I’m tagging @blueberriesandbubbles @goobzoop @anamelessfacelessnerd 

[huneyism]

tagged by @rxseinbloom

slowburn or love at first sight

fake dating or secret dating

enemies to lovers or best friends to lovers

oh no there’s only one bed or long-distance correspondence

hurt/comfort or amnesia  

fantasy au or modern au

mutual pining or domestic bliss

smut or fluff ;)

canon-compliant or fix-it

reincarnation or character death

one-shot or multi chapter - only if complete tho

kid fic or road trip fic - dude cm road trip au

arranged marriage or accidental marriage

high school romance or middle aged romance

time travel or isolated together

neighbours or roommates

sci-fi au or magic au

body swap or genderbend - neither

angst or crack

apocalyptic or mundane

i did most of these with the thought of moreid so l m a o