#months later this is what my followers get lol
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https://www.tumblr.com/weemietime/767670429687152640?source=share
I suppose it was easy for me to fall into the Hamasnik trap due to my habit of black and white thinking, which I wish I could blame on my autism, my ocd, or my horrible mental state, but I’m just incredibly stupid lol. But yeah, I was very much a hamasnik myself.
For some reason my mind refused to accept or recognise the nuance of a history that I wasn't even well versed on in the first place. I also think that the constant reductionism presented to me played a part. There’s a lot of reductionism that goes on within the Hamasnik circles, and it goes hand in hand with anti intellectualism. Statements like “this isn’t complex! How can you see these videos of these Palestinian children (videos that I later found out were actually from Syria, but I couldn’t tell, I just ate it up) and think that Israel/Palestine is complex!”
The whole thing of blocking everyone who has a different opinion or ideology (the ideology in question being Zionism, or at least what hamasniks consider to be Zionism) from you and refusing to follow certain news channels because they’ve shown sympathy for those who have a different ideology from you, refusing to read certain books from authors who have expressed empathy for those same people, all of this together effectively creates an echo chamber of the same opinions and views being regurgitated over and over and over again constantly.
Then sprinkle in constant videos of people dying and blood everywhere, videos that you don’t even know where the people are from, whether they be from Gaza, from Syria, Lebanon, or Yemen, but it doesn’t matter because they speak Arabic so it MUST be about the Gazans specifically according to the Hamasnik group you’re apart of, all of these videos you’re being told to constantly watch over and over again because according to the Hamasnik cult you’re in, “if you look away from the violence even ONCE, you’re complicit in genocide! You’re personally responsible for genocide if you look away! The people in Gaza never get a mental health break or comfort so why should you?”
That very same rhetoric is the reason why a lot of you Jewish people can’t find yourself able to escape on fandom spaces and shit like that, the antisemitism you encounter in spaces you thought you were safe in? Yeah it’s because these people are being told that they have to constantly talk about what’s going on in every single space they’re in and that they can’t look away because if they do, they’re considered complicit in the killing of Gazans so they have to let everyone else know the same.
There are a lot of people who are purposefully antisemitic, don’t get me wrong, this isn’t me excusing anyone. I’m just saying that a number of these people genuinely believe that they’re doing something for the greater good by constantly being antisemitic. They don’t consider themselves antisemitic because the echo chamber they’re in has convinced them that Jewish people aren’t experiencing anything, that Jewish people are fine. That it’s the “big bad” that they’re hurting, not the Jews. It’s the “big and scary Zionists!” At least that’s what happened in my case. Constantly told that if I took a break even once, the blood of the Gazans, the blood of every. single. person in Gaza, would be on my own two hands.
You might not believe me, but when you’ve trapped a person in an echo chamber like that, it’s very easy to convince them that an entire country is evil, that every single Israeli is wicked and corrupt and should die and that anyone who expresses an ounce of empathy for them is a “Zionist” and should die as well.
You could’ve told me anything a few months ago. Absolutely anything bad about Israelis and I would’ve believed you. Because I’d scroll social media and see videos of children dying, people being beaten, buildings being destroyed, everything. Then I’d scroll some more and see videos of Israelis doing everyday things, videos of people having fun, videos of people eating, etc, and I found it so unfair that they (according to hamasnik rhetoric) were living in absolute peace while Palestinians are dying right next to them. Then I’d scroll some more and see videos of the IDF (I actually don’t even know if the videos were even of the IDF or not, but as I said, you could’ve told me anything and I’d have believed you. I genuinely believed that it was the IDF) shooting people, beating people, etc. And I was told to look at these videos everyday, every hour, every minute, every second. A lot of the Hamasnik mouthpieces take advantage of the average westerner’s inability to understand Arabic or Hebrew, so there’s a lot of mistranslated videos of Israelis saying they want every Arab dead, a lot of mistranslated Al Jazeera videos of people in Amsterdam for example, saying “يهودي قذر" (dirty Jew) with the wrong captions on and then us non Arabic speaking cult trapped people are none the wiser to what that means because we refuse to engage with any sources that won’t fit our narrative, because we’re complicit in death if we step outside the narrative.
I don’t believe that Zionists should die, but I did. I don’t believe that the hostages should suffer, but I did. I truly believed the worst of things, and perpetuated horrible antisemitism, because I genuinely believed that I was doing good. I found myself justifying unspeakable acts, and saying unspeakable things, things that I would have whole heartedly condemned prior, because I genuinely thought I was doing something right. For example, prior to me falling into that cultish trap, I would’ve wholeheartedly condemned saying a slur coined by David fucking Duke. But after? As I said, I was doing and saying unspeakable things.
I would watch videos from Hamasniks everyday, perpetuate antisemitism everyday, go to sleep and dream about that stuff, and wake up and do it all again, first thing in the morning. A vicious cycle.
And unknowingly somewhere else around the world, some Jewish or Israeli person would wake up, witness antisemitism everyday, witness people wishing the worst upon the hostages, the Jews, the Israelis, the Zionists, everyday, go to sleep terrified for what’s happening to their people, and wake up and see it all again first thing in the morning. Another vicious cycle.
I wish I had a better answer for you, I do. An answer that’s more digestible and less disturbing. I wish I could undo everything that I’ve said and done to the people I’ve hurt whether that be in real life or online. I truly am sorry, and I wish that an apology would fix everything, but it won’t. I wish that all the pain I inflicted on all the Jewish people and Israeli people could be taken away and that I would feel that pain tenfold.
If it’s any consolation or solace, I hate myself more than any of you combined. There is nobody who hates me more than me at this current moment in time and I absolutely do deserve every ounce of pain inflicted upon me, whether it be mental or physical. If you wish death upon me, just know that I do agree with you, but unfortunately previous attempts have failed.
I deleted all of my old posts from that period of time to avoid people getting hurt by them anymore, but I think I’ve done too much damage for me to be a good ally, so I just say nothing now, but I truly do wish the best for all of you and I wish that all of this would stop and that the hostages will be found, hopefully alive.
My apologies for writing a whole Bible in your asks, I truly didn’t mean to.
TLDR - reductionism and anti-intellectualism combined with trapping yourself in an echo chamber of regurgitated rhetoric and constantly regurgitating said rhetoric is a quick way to find yourself dabbling in extremism.
To avoid falling into a trap such as this, avoid generalisations of races, ethnic groups, and the like, look for nuance, try hear people out even when you don’t understand them, instead of blocking them (this is in reference to me blocking every single person who opposed my hamasnik ideology at the time. You should probably block hamasniks, they tend to harass Jewish people a lot), and remember that if someone tells you that a whole war isn’t complex, they’re lying. It absolutely is.
I hope you've been able to see the other responses your other ask has gotten as well! Truly, you aren't someone who I hate. Personally, I do forgive you. Other people may not, and that's their right. But I know first-hand what it's like to be radicalized and to not only commit to extreme rhetoric but also extreme actions. I've learned to have compassion for myself, and I hope that with time you will undergo a similar process.
Someone else said it, "you can't hate yourself into being a better person." All of us, as beings, grow with love and kindness. War is hard it's horrific, and hellish. You're constantly exposed to this violent imagery, this extreme rhetoric, and your whole friend groups are getting in on it. I understand exactly how it happens, and I do have sympathy for it.
To me, the most important part of your story isn't the worst shit you've ever done. It's this part. The part where you learn how to be better, and so you do better, and reach out across the divides and bridge those gaps that have formed. That is a very human story.
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Is it just me or have the Sussexes laid low? I kinda think they aren’t interested in playing games anymore and are sort of quietly living their lives now. I don’t think they’re still gonna do that overshadowing on the BRF’s special days thing. My memory might need to be refreshed but the last I remember of them doing that sort of thing is when Nacho posted Meghan’s dog biscuits on the day of Kate’s return at Trooping the Color which got her called out by the media. But since then, I feel like they have laid low. Idk… I don’t wanna summon them lol but I feel there is some peace and quiet in the royal watching world for a few months now.
They always lay low like this before they do something big and splashy. It’s their tell.
Take last year, for example. They were pretty quiet from mid-November 2023 to late January 2024, making just a couple of work-related appearances. But then February came and the Sussexes took Vancouver by force with:
A) exclusive and first public royal comments about Charles’s cancer diagnosis
B) massive PR clapbacks responding to rumors of problems in the marriage and criticism
C) a huge rebrand from Archewell to Sussex Royal, complete with a brand new website, official use of Meghan’s Royal cipher, and endorsed by the BRF (or at least Charles) when the official palace website linked to it
D) the biggest, clearest trial balloon of bringing the Sussexes back into the fold (which was nixed faster than the speed of light after KP told the press “over William’s dead body”)
E)And then less than a month later, Meghan launched ARO with her oft-promised return to social media in a slick promo video that went absolutely nowhere.
F) Followed by “woe is me” PR after Kate’s BBC video statement because they weren’t told beforehand and had to learn about her condition the same time the rest of us did.
Discussion about the February events:
So we've been here before. After the Colombia trip in August, the Sussexes have been pretty quiet with just work-related appearances. Meaning that soon there will be something big, splashy, and messy from Montecito. Will it be a divorce announcement? Will it be a massive PR clapback campaign? Will it be a new strategic initiative? Will it be ARO's actual launch and product rollout? Will it be a welcome back to the BRF, or even just a trial balloon? No one knows.
But something is definitely coming down the pike. It's very much "the kids are too quiet" energy.
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Hi there! I love your art so much! Your comics always make me smile :) You are so talented!! I have a quick question for you (I hope that's ok!!).
What do you do when you get art block? I struggle with following through and finishing pieces, as well as coming up with ideas. Do you have any advice for that?
Thanks so much, I hope you have a wonderful day! 🩵
Aaaw thank you so much!!!! 🥹��
And oooh ok so I actually have some advice for that! I went through a massive art block where I didn't draw a single thing from 2019 up to 2022, like absolutely nothing
And I was able to get out of the art block by redrawing stuff! Like taking a screenshot from a movie I like and redrawing it in my style. I redrew like 10 screenshots from Disney movies until the inspiration started coming to me on its own
The nice thing about redrawing something that already exists is that you don't have to come up with a composition or an idea, since it's already there, so it let's you only focus on the art process
These were from early 2022, the last of the batch of the screenshots I redrew before I started drawing stuff out of my own head lol
And then later that year, I would still get stuck every once on a while, so redrawing screenshots it was until I got the inspiration back again lol
When I get stuck now, I usually redraw a meme or a screenshot, too, since it helps me warm up and get back into the creative process hehe like this thing I did when I was stuck some months ago
Redrawing trends or memes is also great for inspiration, since you don't have to think about poses or the idea itself, plus it's fun to imagine a character saying incorrect quotes, etc
As for coming up with ideas, the brainrot is always in my head lol so I listen to a song or watch a show and I'm constantly thinking "this is something x character would say/do" and I take notes about it and then use it as inspiration 🤭 it's all about seeing the blorbos everywhere
Anyway, I don't know if this is helpful advice or not, but it has helped me in more than one occasion!
Redrawing your own old art is also an old reliable trick to beat art block hehe
Anyway, thank you so much once again, and I hope you have a beautiful day!!! 🥹💖
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a quick FAQ!
hi! world's worst ask replier here to answer the most common questions all in one. i'm sorry it's another long block of text, i didn't want to spam everyone with individual posts. hopefully you can just skim it and easily see the question you're looking for
i definitely left out some, so please do feel free to ask again if i didn't answer yours, as well as anything else you might be wondering about
Q: Do you accept desserts? A: yes! the main focus is on regular food but we will also have a few desserts, just know the chances of those making it in might be lower depending on how many we get
Q: I have a recipe but it's got a lot of meat, can I still submit it? A: YES!! sorry i think me mentioning how we want vegan options made people think they can't submit any meat at all, but you can! by all accounts dnp very much do eat meat, they just seem to try to limit it. the ideal option is having non-meat alternatives for meat dishes, but if yours doesn't really work for that don't worry about it, submit it anyway, it could still make it in you never know
Q: How do you know the recipes people submit are actually good? A: it's a bit tricky because i can't actually try them all, nor do i think it would be fair to judge them purely based on my own preferences. what even is good? good to whom? it's all very subjective. the most important thing is that it's a serious recipe and not just a terrifying concoction someone came up with high as fuck at 3 in the morning, and at least those are fairly easy to distinguish
Q: Are you just one person deciding what makes it in? A: no one actually asked this but, adding onto the last answer, this seems like as good a place as any to clarify that i'm not just like picking my personal favourites and calling it a day. i will be asking around for opinions and i've got some friends helping out, as well as my mother who knows a looot about cooking and and recipes. i promise this isn't just the most unemployed person you follow on a power trip, just in case anyone was worried
Q: I can't provide my own photos of my dish(es), can I just find some online? A: eh, maybe. ideally we want a photo of the exact recipe, plus it's a lot more personal if it's our own pictures! you don't have to take it yourself though, we can most likely find someone else to do it, with the added bonus of they get to try out your recipe. worst comes to worst however, since this book isn't being sold or anything we can use pictures from online as a last resort, i just think it's cuter not to. but don't worry about any of this when submitting recipes, we'll get to it
Q: Will the book be available online or is it just for Dan and Phil? A: the whole thing will be uploaded as a pdf for everyone to download and do whatever they want with
Q: Do you need help with- A: maybe! probably! i'm not sure! genuinely huge thank you to everyone who's reached out to offer assistance, i appreciate the help a lot and i'm very happy people are so excited to get involved. i'm so sorry i haven't responded to most of you, the main issues are literally just that i'm a bit of a control freak and also don't know exactly what the plan is yet. i would just hate to tell anyone they can help with something specific and then suddenly decide to go in another direction, you know? also i'm a bit shy, believe it or not, lol. i don't like telling people no or criticising someone's work, which combined with the aforementioned control freak bit makes things a bit awkward. we will see how it goes though, i might reach out to some of you later if i have something specific i know i need help with, at which point you're free to either help or tell me to fuck off for leaving you hanging for a month that's also fair. really though, again, thank you, so many of you are very helpful and kind and i appreciate you <3
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Double arrows
Yeah, so this is lazy but just something I randomly thought about and wanted to doodle! Remembered this and thought about how they are both aro! Even though Aim is ace, too, I thought it was fun.
Creamer is just the best babysitter. XD
Aim by @zu-is-here
Creamer by me! And yes I missed his bday again
#undertale au#my art#undertale multiverse#sansest#sanscest#fluffynightkiller#cross x dream#dream x cross#fluffynight#fluffynight ship kid#cream ship kid#coffee creamer#aim#i just know that creamer would be so proud of his cousin if he met him later on#someone to relate to and always happy to give advice while aim was figuring it out#and yeee hes wearing a dress and he looks cute doing it#months later this is what my followers get lol#uni is going well just tired rn#gonna go drink coffee#utmv ship kids#post dark cream#doodles
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keep it up!
#my art#moondrop#daycare attendant#i've been getting a lot of attention here lately.. thank you everyone!!#im almost at 200 followers which is. wow#unfortunately i draw very slowly so i can't post very consistently#maybe for 200 i'll make that accurate dca tutorial? i'll see what i can do#anyway.. about this drawing!! it has a funny story#so.. my 'kill everyone' tshirt sun drawing actually does have a matching moon!! because i drew the idea months ago#back when i was still figuring out how i wanted to draw them#so this moon was supposed to be the matching moon shirt.. but i couldnt get the face to look right so i gave up lol#but i'll probably try again later.. in the meantime i'll keep chipping away at my other drawings
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boy in silly sitting positions compilation
#cats#I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol#I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh#I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day#so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the#writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird#to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in#it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something#''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way#you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj#Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up#with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just#stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house#in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty#that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn#There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not#even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy#birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public#ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take#anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some#things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like#2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were#playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my#evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas
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one day when the horrors cease i will make chicken gnocci soup and feel at home
#pigeon talks#just waiting for this semester to end college is kicking my ass if y'all couldn't tell LOL#4.0 GPA top 10 hs graduate to this six months later......who would've thought. not me!#i should've taken a gap year but i didn't want to disappoint my parents and lose information#what a lie#that “losing information” over time thing being a reason why i was told not to take a gap year and also the “don't take 8 am classes”#and blah blah blah#all those mainstream advide to freshies i regret following#i would take a 6AM CLASS if it meant getting out of my 6PM CLASS#man....lesson learned never letting ppl tell me what to do again#i have to listen to myself bc i know what works for me and what doesn't#sry for the rant i'm just yearning for better times#ah........
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#damn babygirl i wish people checked up on me more#this self conscious catgirl is so tired#sometimes i WISH people just came into my dms to ask me if im ok#i do it constantly to others because i hope theyre not as sad as i am feeling in that moment#genuinely afraid to have made someone feel bad and drive them away from me#and omg i feel nyself running thin again just bc im afraid to lose the interactions we have altogether because i cant process certain media#in a healthy way whatsoever and i get super hung up on thinfs that really dont matter that much in the end#YEAH IM RAMBLING IT'S 5:30 AM AND I COULD BE SLEEPING RIGHT NOW BUT INSTEAD IM JUST CRYING FOR A STUPID REASON!!#i think ive only had one person check up on me based off the vibes in chat i gave off alone in the past couple of months#which was baffling and surreal btw and i think it broke something within me#it came from someone i wouldve never expected to even notice because sometimes it feels like its such a vast difference between us#i sometimes even wonder how are we friends in the first place#like do i even deserve to call this person my friend do they feel like that? or are we just discord acquaintances?#anyway all this just made me sad and my dumb ass is crying and yearning to be loved by my online peers thats all lol. meows pathetically#idk i guess i just.want to hear / see it more rather than just teying to tell myself that over and over hoping im not deluding myself abt i#personal#sorry for the emotions dump idk whats wrong with me tonight actually#me having to come to terms with the reality that i actually have a following and this might get boticed by more than 2 ppl#bc not everyone follows 3k blogs like i am :skull emoji: yknow#im probably gonna delete later because im actually a super self conscious person to the point i get nauseatingly anxious about it holy shit#i dont vent often and im 120% keeping it in but when i do oh boy#the dam bursts and im left like a sopping wet dog on the floor looking like a sad blob#which i am feeling like right now!#vent#emy rambles#ALSO LIKE THIS ISNT TO SAY IM NOT GRATEFUL FOR MY FRIENDS OMG I AM#k really am#sometimes its still like. idk. unbelievable to me that people are genuinely interacting with me and the things i write or headcanon#and i shouldn't expect them to know whats wrong with me or if i feel bad if i dont say it or communicate that to them#but yknow one can yearn
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fun fact about me: as a kid, I came so close (three years in a row!) to being cast in the show at the American Girl store that i still get the songs stuck in my head every once in a while!
#the third time i swear to you the only reason i didn't get it was bc i wasn't confident enough in my tap to do the tap audition for molly#and that was the year they told the parents after the last round that they'd probably call again for a closed audition a few months later#and then ag announced that the theatres were closing at all three stores instead lol#anyway sometimes i think abt that what if timeline of my life lol usually when i have follow your heart stuck in my head!#finn talks
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#i kinda like that i showed up months after the wave of the fandom when it wasinitially airing#i think there’s a special experience about getting to react and discuss as it’s happening#but i also liked that i got to find the ppl who stuck around and the rewatches were a lot of fun and low stakes bc it sorta flew under the#lots of the people i follow idec if they watching and talking’s about something else entirely now. i just like hearing what they have to sa#about things lol#all this is to say don’t be surprised if i go silent when s2 is in the initial airing stages. and come back a while later with my thoughts
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Might just scrap all my shitty unfinished fics and peace out of this fandom for good tbh.
#What is wrong with you Sam you should not be allowed to write#If only I'd followed my own advice there...#Someone please remind me to delete this later LOL#My motivation to write is pretty much gone entirely due to my increasing disdain for AEW as of late#And the fact that I only ship microscopically small rarepairs that literally ONE other person in the fandom gives a shit about (if that)#And none of the major pairings/wrestlers getting pushed rn appeal to me in the slightest#So what's the fucking point LOL#And to top it all off my writing - just like AEW's booking these days - is Pure Shit!#So I guess it's a good thing no one would read these hypothetical fics even if I finished and posted them#So I may as well just not bother YAAAAAAAY 🙂🙂🙂#Welp. I promise I'll get *slightly* less annoying next month after Veilguard comes out#Hopefully that game won't suck and then I'll have a new hyper-fixation to replace the old one and all will be fine again#Maybe I'll even stop bitching!#We can only hope!
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Personal vent and ugly mental illness symptom talk
So, I should unpack this with my therapist, but shit's embarrassing, so I'm just gonna vent it out on the public internet lmao.
I was typing out a whole thing about how I KNOW I'm aromantic, and despite that, still have moments where my brain gaslights me into believing I'm in fairytale love.
I should preface by saying I have not officially been diagnosed with either additional mental illnesses I believe that I have (B.P//D and AD//HD [which lol being on AD//HD meds since antidepressants didn't do anything has given me some notable improvement, but I'm still without a diagnosis], nor Au//tism) DESPITE repeatedly asking multiple therapists multiple times and a psych like 100 times to give me a definitive yes or a no.
But holy shit. So I'm typing about how I've 'Favourite Person'-ed multiple people at multiple points in my life across all ages, and I'm like, okay, it's been a hot minute since I refreshed my definition of that, I should make sure that's still a thing and not something I just made up or has been dropped from the symptoms or whatever the case. I wanna make sure I'm using it right in this rant about how falling into Favourite Personing people in the past has made me believe 'wait, maybe I'm not aro, this HAS to be like the deepest truest love in existence, despite my years of knowing I'm aro.' Like, I'm so aro I once calculated out the date, months in advance, I was gonna tell someone I was dating that I loved them, only because it seemed like a socially acceptable amount of time to say it. I wasn't thinking about what I actually felt lmao. (And that was probably not a FP relationship, too, so I know that was absolutely an aro incident.)
Anyways, so I'm reading a couple articles to make sure I articulate my points about how it's conflicted with being aro, and I read about how people falling into having a FP will even hate that person for the slightest perceived wrongs. (I knew this, I just was thinking about the love incidents since that's what was related to my point about being aro.)
And holy shit. That just. Unlocked a memory I have about when I was an older kid, like probably 9ish (and older), I HATED my best friend of many years and who would continue being my bff for more years. Who was my everything. I couldn't stop thinking about how much I hated them. I would lie awake at night (insomnia too tho) thinking about how much I hated them and I couldn't understand why I didn't just stop being their friend and start hanging out with old friends more instead. I just couldn't do it, I wanted to hang out with THEM. I was so sick and feeling jealous of them whenever I found out they'd been hanging out with someone else one-on-one and I wasn't invited. Even when it was their own family. One time they brought me a plate of cookies by surprise for (before) a holiday that they'd just made with their cousin or something. And I felt so sick about how I wasn't there for that, it felt like an insult. I couldn't have put this into words, unless I just now read that point in an article and made a connection. It was so confusing, because usually the people who hated their 'best friend' was like, the mean girl kinda character who intentionally does it to hurt the innocent main character or something, but I was the one who felt wronged every time those feelings would come up. And this wasn't just a 'man it's so annoying when they do this specific thing.' This was active stewing, in a slow cooker, all day and all night kinda thing.
I was never romantically or sexually attracted to that person, but I probably wrote all this off as either unrelated sexuality or gender bullshit when I figured that out later. But knowing now that there was definitely someone (actually, I'm thinking of WAY more people as I'm typing this, and just realized why I stopped loving a band and started hating them 'for no reason' wow lmao) that I FP'ed who I definitely WASN'T attracted to, suddenly convinces me that I was probably right in suspecting B.P//D. (Or, y'know, maybe I don't have that specifically, and it's the symptom from a different facet of mental illness or whatever.) I've been so hung up over how I'm aro, sometimes ace, and then this 'only' happens towards people I am attracted to. Like, 'maybe it was love and I'm just terrible at it.' (No! It's not! Aro is correct! That's just the brain manipulating me to get another hit of dopamine off a FP! It's just easier to happen to someone I'm attracted to!)
It's no fucking wonder why I always worried about people hating me in secret, and it's because I was absolutely making myself insufferable because of that worry. I know for a fact that some people definitely did hate (or. Lmao. Shut up. Like, 'resented' maybe fits better) me for demanding constant attention that was never reciprocated by anyone I've ever met in my entire life.
I probably wrote-off so many symptoms as 'I was a moody teen and kind of an asshole.' Except it happened before and after I was a teen, too. I would have excused everything that happened during and before high school, when I should have been looking for these patterns I kept following for years after. It doesn't help that my first relationship was wildly toxic (mostly against me in this one case), and while I didn't feel particularly bothered by it after I got over the nightmare breakup, I just kept going 'What if it was the sole cause of all of this and I'm just repressing that?' Well, phew! No, it's not, that was thankfully just a toxic embarrassment, and not the source of all my problems. I was already on the shitstorm trajectory. That's a major relief. If you can call it that. I really don't like discussing that one, but not in a trauma way, more like a, you don't really wanna discuss pissing your pants on accident kinda way. Unpleasant to remember, wildly embarrassing to talk about, but ultimately not a life-altering event.
Ughhhhh. Maybe I should bring this (the mental illness not the relationship) up to the therapist. But like, I haven't been close friends with anyone in like 6 years or so, so I don't have any current or even recent examples about how being in friendships has always turned out Russian Roulette for me. My therapist doesn't seem to believe how bad it was for me to be in friendships where I was unintentionally FP'ing someone. Because besides the depression and anxiety (and mild OCD), I'm a totally normal person to her who's just dealing with shit health problems and grief (and frustration from being trans and not in a safe place to transition). Y'know, normal life problems most people will feel at some point, just chronic in my case. I may be weird, but I'm obviously far from the worst she's seen. I'm not uniquely mentally ill.
((Except the whole 'treatment resistant depression' diagnosis bullshit from the psych, but I'm learning it's not just mental issues I have that are treatment resistant lol.))
I tried talking to her about a small part of all this before, but IDK what I did wrong, she took it 100% as me being the one unintentionally wronged and not setting MY own boundaries (lmao), so like I don't know how to word this in a way she'd understand that most of my problems in this area were my own fault. (I mean that both negatively and neutrally, because it's an ugly side of mental illness, but not one I chose or know how to help.)
Not being in close friendships with anyone has had an understandably sane-ifying effect on me (barring the, y'know, depression/anxiety/OCD and baseline weirdness), which has gotten me trapped for the 5th time in 6 years of making my therapists believe I'm better off than I actually am. (I've done this to every therapist I've ever had before that, too.) But like, again, at least for the past 3 therapists and the latest psych, I AM actually better for not having close friends lmao. Only one therapist ever had one visit of me wanting to address these concerns specifically while they were currently active, and by the next visit, we had to shift exclusively to sudden new grief lol. (What a shitshow. It somehow always ends up that whenever I wanna treat an illness, it's like opening a can of worms, except the worms are firecrackers and I didn't set the can down and step back a few feet.)
Like, it obviously feels safer to not have close friends at all because there's no fear of abandonment if I have no one to begin with. And, genuinely, I operate better when I'm alone. But now that I've known safety, it's hard to imagine throwing myself back into the roulette wheel, hoping I don't land on red OR black. But fuck, man. It is lonely.
And being aro? It's freeing, and validating too, to have a word for it, but I'm not gonna mince words here, I hate it. I wish I could feel romantic love. Like normal, not mentally ill ""love."" I feel platonic love all the time, like for friends (not FP) always. I love saying 'I love you' to friends and meaning it. But I want to feel romantic love. I just don't. I just feel friendship, Favoriting, and/or sexual attraction sometimes. Probably why I'm so into shipping and fanfics. I got a lot more "probably why's" but I don't wanna go down that in this already vulnerable post lol. (I already made a whole post about one of the why's back in like 2013 or 14 lmao, without connecting it to this.)
Anyway, I put this whole mental illness and relationships deal into ugly imagery in a current fic WIP I'm working on, since recognizing I was aro took living through FP'ing a few 'romantic' relationships, before I even first heard the term FP. I only saw my experiences as 'I don't think I've been experiencing love' and that by itself felt like it fit. I didn't realize there was anything wrong, even as I outwardly said shit like 'I don't think I'm fit for being in a relationship' to the few people who asked me out, even when I wanted to say yes.
And then I kept trying to make relationships work lmao. I don't know why I even bothered. I just wanted to be wrong about being aro, especially when it was a point of contention (aro and ace separately) with some of the relationships.
I'd probably have to meet another aro person of the exact same flavour of aromanticism to make it work, but even then the mental illness would just be a ticking time bomb. No one wants to be the recipient of FP 'affection', except maybe sometimes the fictional people in a certain fiction trope that winds up being fetishistic, even if it's not intended to insult real people (but sometimes it is). And it's just a reminder of how I was probably a big source of toxicity for probably half the people who have ever been close with me, if it's even half of how fiction portrays people with this symptom.
I dunno where I wanted to end this vent, so here's probably a good place. Just wanted to get this off my chest, because it just now felt like a pretty big revelation that my problems weren't related to romanticism, I've had purely platonic instances of this dating back to being an older kid, and more during high school, and I just never connected the two before now.
#dont read if u think im cool#id rather stay cool lol#long post#delete later / /#(in case i change my mind or wanna edit)#Cori.exe#Post.exe#man i talk a lot#shouldve spent this time writing fics instead but i rly needed to talk (type) this out since i dont wanna bring it up in therapy again yet#anyway lmao there we go#rly excited for the fic tho. besides the stuff i mentioned i also took this popular trope and#wait#why am i spoiling it im not gonna convince anyone who read this post lol youll just have to wait for the hot platonic smmmmmut#and hilarious storytelling by one char#and then (still a wip) round 2#bc no fic is complete until theres a round 2. imo.#((yes i know i have a different round 2 thats over a month late past when i was gonna post it lol i havent forgotten))#here we go writing an essay in the tags now too lmao#ok i need a break for my eyes and then im gonna try to write the platonic one more#hhhh anxious tht my reputation will tank from posting this. idk how i or my 2 followers will survive th consequent backlash and cancellation#(joke)#(still anxious tho)#(i have diagnosed chronic anxiety lol)#eager to know what id be cancelled from tho. maybe my puppetfuckinglicense gets revoked.#maybe my shrimp get taken into protective custody#shrustody#sorry i dont mean to make light of legit cancellations im just trying to convince myself its okay to post on my own blog#good fucking luck catching all those shrimp tho i dont even know how many i have. they control their own population at this point.#they probably have their own system of... shrovernment#Prime Shrimpister Isosceles rules with an iron swimerette i wouldnt wanna interfere with that sovereign nation
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Saving Genya from his big brother only to make out with Sanemi
Pairing: Sanemi x fem!reader
Word Count: 2,9k
Synopsis: It was never an easy job, being the only one who's able to calm the wind hashira down. There was never more than respect and understanding between both of you. Until you bodly decided to stand up for Genya, until Sanemi finally reveals his true feelings...
Warnings: We're talking about Sanemi so language at violence lol, aggressive making out
I love love love Sanemi and I desperately hope you do as well hehe, enjoy and leave a comment/like/reblog <3
There he stands with his hot temper filling the air and his ruthless beatings torturing the poor souls in front of you. Hashira training never sounded like fun to you, especially when you consider who you’d have to deal with.
Sanemi Shinazugawa, especially.
“Get back up, brat. We’re not finished yet.”
You watch from afar as he hits the poor red-haired poor over and over again. Without any mercy, without the slightest hint of regret. And still, you can’t help but ponder about the way his arms flex and show every vein that decorates his skin. How he moves so effortlessly that your eyes are almost unable to follow. No, it’s not a secret that apart from being a madman, Sanemi Shinazugawa is hot as hell.
And your crush since you joined the demon slayer corps.
“Don’t you think that’s enough for today? The poor boy isn’t even able to stand up straight anymore”, you interfere when he’s about to hit him once again.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were the expert on disciplining. How about me fetching you a chair so you can supervise more comfortably?”
All pairs of eyes are set on you while you step towards the scene in death silence. Apart from everyone else, you aren’t here to train under Sanemi. No, you are a very capable demon slayer yourself, so good that you even managed to beat Mitsuri from time to time. You definetely don’t need Sanemi to train.
In fact, you are here because you’re the only one who is able to tame him apart from Kagaya-sama himself.
"Well, if you ask me so nicely, a chair actually doesn’t sound bad for the next time. Meanwhile, how about we wrap this up? Enough's enough."
Sanemi’s venomous eyes meet yours, tempting you to lose your cool. Within the past few months, you’ve learned how to act around him and that his actions don’t reflect his true feelings at all. Deep within, he is the most caring and compassionate person you’ve ever met, so tender that you’d simply melt away in his touch. He never failed to protect you even if not needed, always made sure you are save before looking out for himself. Damn, he even left his desert for you to eat.
But on the other hand, he’s very good at hiding that side of him.
“Fine. Call it quits for today then. But we two will have a talk later”, he finally mutters before turning around and disappearing without any trace.
Your heart skips a few beats before you’re able to think straight again. Oh, how much you adore him. Just the sheer thought of meeting him alone sends shivers down your spine even though nothing ever happened between you two. After all, you’re only here to look out for him, right?
“Thank you for standing up for me. Now you’ll get in trouble for helping me out”, the red-haired boy lying in front of your feet speaks out while dragging himself up.
“Oh, don’t worry about me, I can handle him. Are you alright?”
In the matter of seconds, your eyes scan his body for serious injuries. Nothing, as you expected. Even though his training methods seem rough, he’d never allow himself to truly lay hands on another corps member. Not even him, Kamado Tanjiro. The boy who has what Sanemi always dreamed of.
“Yes, thanks to you. We really need a break after training day and night. Sorry, may I ask you for your name?
“My name is (y/n). Nice to finally meet you in person, Kamado Tanjiro.”
His eyes widen in an instant when you tell him your name. Even though you’re not a hashira, it seems like a lot of corps member know you. A decently skilled swordswoman, a trained doctor who made sure that no one ever died as long as you were around.
“The angel”, he breathes out.
“What an honor to meet you in person!”
In an instant, he gets on his knees and places his head on his flat palms. A pose of deep respect, so intimate that your cheeks heat up in an instant.
“Please, lift yourself off the ground. I don’t deserve your praise-“
“You deserve so much more than that!”, Tanjiro interrupts in an instant.
“Leave her alone. Can’t you see that you’re making her uncomfortable?”, another voice mutters from behind.
A very familiar voice you haven’t heard in quite some time, that makes your heart jump up and down in joy.
“Genya!”, you cry out.
You waste no time. In an instant, you lunge yourself at the now much taller boy and wrap your arms around him so tightly that he cannot escape. Oh, you really missed him. Even though Sanemi states over and over how much he hates his little brother, you always had a weak spot for him. Maybe because you’re able to see his soft side as well or because of the cute way he blushes when you look at him.
“Genya, are you alright? Your face is so red-“
“SHUT UP”, he barks at Tanjiro while you giggle to yourself.
“Why didn’t you send me a crow like I told you to? I was beyond worried about you. But oh I’m so proud. Did you really help to kill an upper moon demon and supported your friends?”
“Well I-“
“Yes he did! He was a big help for all of us!”, Tanjuro interferes immediately.
“(y/n), didn’t I tell you we need to talk?”, someone suddenly barks from the inside.
All color drains from Genya’s face immediately as he turns around with you.
There he stands with his arms crossed in front of his muscular chest, eyes almost piercing through you while the vein on his forehead threatens to pop any minute.
Your heart sinks in an instant. No, don’t let him control you like that, not when you know that he’s just…jealous?
“I needed to talk to Genya first”, you clarify.
“(y/n), please don’t-“
“Oh, is that so? Why would you even look at that trash?”
Thick anger rushes through your veins like the flood. If there’s one thing you hate about Sanemi’s attitude, it’s the way he talks about his little brother.
“I’m looking at you as well, don’t I?”
He flinches ever so slightly, his furrowed eyes now piercing through you like a thousand knives.
“Get inside. Right now.”
“Get some rest you two”, you quickly shout over your shoulder before you disappear into the house with a furious Sanemi by your side.
He slams the door shut behind you so rapidly that it rains plaster.
“What was that, huh?”, he speaks out with threatening low voice.
“I asked your little brother about his mission.”
He cages you between the wall with no way to escape, dangerous eyes locked with yours.
“I told you to stay away from him.”
“And I told you that I don’t care.”
“Why don’t you leave, then?”
“Because I’m the only one who’s able to tame you down”, you bite back.
He huffs in sheer annoyance while pushing himself off the wall. Why does he have to look so vulnerable and strong at the same time, so scary but also mesmerizing?
“You won’t force me to talk to him”, he finally speaks out.
“I want him to leave the corps and get as far away from me as possible.”
“Away from you or away from the danger?”
“I don’t care about him.”
“So you don’t care about me as well?”
Thick silence hangs between both of you while you stare at each other. To this day he never revealed how he truly feels about you. Does he hate you, respect you, love you? You might never know. But your influence on him speaks for itself.
“Go to sleep. We’ll get up early tomorrow.”
Without another word, he leaves you standing in a new wave of ponderings and emotions.
-a few hours later-
Your eyes dart open for no reason. Aimlessly, your orbs roam around the dark room, ears searching for a single sound.
Voices. Shouting. Blows.
Blows?
“Big brother?”
Your heart drops to the floor. That’s Genya. Why does the floor start to vibrate now?
Out of instinct, you yank out of your room, follow a wave of destruction until you finally get what’s going on.
There they stand. Genya with fright written all over his face and Sanemi with orbs so empty you’re almost able to see through them.
Your guts turn uncomfortably as he speeds forward so fast that your eyes are almost unable to follow. Fuck, is he about to pierce through Genya’s eyes?
You waste no time. In the matter of milliseconds, you drag Genya to the ground and therefore safe him from Sanemi’s merciless attack.
“Sanemi.”
You breathe out his name like a prayer.
“Get out of line, (y/n).”
“I can’t allow you to hurt him!”, you cry out, hands still holding onto Genya’s trembling body for dear life.
“You leave me no choice, then.”
It happens faster than you’re able to think. He dashes forward while grabbing the handle of his sword tightly, his eyes and blade darted towards you.
But you don’t even think about leaving Genya. No, you stand your ground in front of him, glossy orbs watching as his blade crashes down straight towards your face.
Until it stops.
“I said move”, he hisses through gritted teeth.
“And I said I won’t. Leave Genya alone.”
“Are you really putting up a fight with me, (y/n)? Here, right in front of everyone else?”
You couldn’t care less about the stinging fact that the others are watching you drowned in fear. This goes too far without any doubt.
“You don’t have to do this, Sanemi. Not when we both know you love your little brother dearly”, you breathe out.
“Come on Genya, let’s leave”, Tanjiro’s voice mutters behind you, causing a wave of relief to wash over you.
“I don’t love anyone. Not him, not you, I don’t give a shit about anyone around here”, Sanemi barks back at you with nothing but hatred spilling from his mouth.
Genya doesn’t deserve those words reaching his ear. But apart from that, you can’t escape the sting that fills your heart with agony.
Him, not loving anyone? Of course you never really expected the wind hashira to actually like you back. Of course even him respecting you is more than you could have ever asked for. But somehow you still hoped. Each and every night, you imagined what if would feel like to lay in his arms while listening to his steady heartbeat. Every free second, you pondered about how his lips must feel pressed against yours, how it feels to fall asleep and wake up next to him.
And now he tells you that you mean nothing to him.
You swallow hard, desperately trying to avoid his gaze at any cause. No, you can’t afford to lose yourself right here when everyone is watching.
Out of instinct, you straighten your shoulders and cross your arms in front of your chest.
“If that’s the case, I’m leaving. Good night, wind hashira.”
You don’t care about waiting for an answer. All you want to do right now is going back into your room, going back into safety where he’s not around. How stupid to even consider that Sanemi Shinazugawa could feel anything apart from a little respect for you. You, nothing but an ordinary slayer, still too weak to be called a real hashira. You, apparently nothing but a fool.
Hot tears start to swell up your eyes and cause your vision to get foggy. You never allowed yourself to cry over something so minor. What did you expect, a gut-wrenching love story? With the wind hashira?
“Why did you turn your back on me?”
You flinch so hard that you almost trip over your futon.
“What are you doing here?”, you cry out.
Fuck, this is him, without any doubt. What on earth is Sanemi doing in your room? Just now, when you’re looking like a mess.
“Are you crying?”
“Even if I do, why would you care?”
When your gaze drifts towards his, you feel like drowning and taking your first breath at the same time. He looks so distressed that your heart wrenches all over again. Like a lost puppy, he draws closer until he cages you against the wall. His eyes seem to stare right through your soul, make it hard to produce a single logical thought.
“Why would you even think that, idiot?”
His hand yanks your chin up, forces you to stare at him even more intensely.
“Because you said so yourself”, you bite back.
“You shouldn’t have interrupted me in the middle of teaching Genya a lesson.”
“Teaching him a lesson? You’re breaking that poor boy’s heart-“
“Breaking him? I’m saving him, goddamn!”, he blurts out so suddenly that you shake.
“Saving him? What are you t-“
“Poking his eyes out isn’t that big of a deal, he’d definitely survive. But his career at the demon slayer corps would have been over and out, he would have been saved”, he mumbles frantically.
“That would have meant he’s save, that would have meant he doesn’t die in this shit-“
“Sanemi”, your hands grab his face gently, try to get him out of his constant mumbling.
“He’ll die just like our mother did.”
“Sanemi.”
“I can’t fucking protect you all. Not when you’re around as well, not when you’re not listening just like he does-“
“Sanemi.”
When your eyes meet his, he looks like a troubled child scared of thunder. His glossy orbs stare at you desperately, make your heart ache all over again. All that rambling, giving Genya his coldest shoulder…to protect him?
“You’re just as reckless as him. Not looking out for yourself. What am I supposed to do without both of you around? What if I lose you two as well?”
“You won’t lose anyone, I’m good enough to-“
“How can you know?”, he screams into your face, his voice vibrating through every cell of your body like thunder.
“How can you promise you won’t die? One wrong move and you’re gonna bite the dust. Or you’re at the wrong place at the wrong time like Rengoku-“
It might be the stupidest thing you’ve ever done in your entire life, so reckless that you’ll lose Sanemi completely.
But you don’t care.
Before he’s able to talk about the grief within the past any further, you crash your lips against his while holding onto his face for dear life.
Over and over, again and again until your mind finally shuts up, until it’s only you and Sanemi and his puffy lips against yours.
He wraps his arms around you so tightly that you allow your knees to give in, bodies resting against each other so desperately that you feel like dreaming. Countless nights you pondered about the way his frame feels pressed against yours, what the wind hashira might taste like.
Oh, the reality is so much better, so good that you have to convince yourself you’re not dreaming.
“You’re driving me insane. Since the first time I saw you training with Obanai, since you beamed at me with that sickening gorgeous smile. I can’t escape you. I can’t fucking lose you”, he hisses against your mouth before entangling his tongue with yours all over again.
Sparks fly, stars take up your sight completely as you threaten to choke on all the affection and love that hits you with full force.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”, you breathe out.
“And risking you’ll never talk to me again? You have to be out of your mind.”
“I’m out of my mind because of you. Because you make me feel all those strange things”, you puff out.
Faster than you’re able to react, he pulls his face away from yours enough to almost drown inside your glossy orbs. For a moment, all the does is staring at you as you desperately gasp for air with your chest rising and falling rapidly. This really happened. Did you really make out with the wind hashira after he tried to murder his little brother, after all the fighting and rambling of today?
“You’re my weakness, (y/n)”, he finally blurts out.
“And I hate that power you have over me. Especially that everyone else knows it.”
You tilt your head to the side. Oh, that’s so true. After all, this is the reason why you were sent here. You are here to make sure he doesn’t go too rough on his students, that his hot temper is kept at least a little cool.
Well, given the heat that radiates from him at this very moment, the last part definitely didn’t go as planned.
“They know about my feeling for you as well.”
His eyes widen while he stares you up and down in sheer disbelief.
“Stop fucking with me”, he grumbles.
“You were too blind to realize that I loved you for so long while I didn’t even think about the opportunity that you might like me back”, you admit with your cheeks turning as hot as the sun.
“You fool.”
He yanks your chin towards his face, a small smile decorating his usual so irritated face.
“I’ll definitely never let you go again now.”
His lips crash into yours and leave your mind blank all over again.
“But I’ll still kick your ass for talking to me so disrespectfully and interfering with Genya.”
Tags: @chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly @beatrexworld
@froufrousnowman @hidazinie @tomiokathedepresso @poketrainer2270 @chaoticwinnercupcake
@lees-chaotic-brain @wordskeeper @polarbvnny @sugu-love @ryva @baku2345
@komelrebi-san @kentocalls (your fic will be next) @barbuse @sunshine7queen @lavenderdrxp
@yaninnaacu @hopefulbelievertimemachine (thank you sooo much for helping me creating reader for the cover)
#demon slayer x reader#demon slayer#kny#hashira training arc#sanemi shinaguzawa#sanemi shinazugawa#demon slayer sanemi#kny sanemi#sanemi x reader#kimetsu no yaiba#sanemi fluff#sanemi x you#sanemi x y/n#shinazugawa brothers#kny shinazugawa#demon slayer shinazugawa#kny x female reader#kny x reader#kny x y/n#kny x you#kimetsu x reader#kimetsu fanfic#demon slayer fanfic#kny fanfic#kny fluff#demon slayer fluff#sanemi fanfic#genya shinazugawa#kny genya#demon slayer genya
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not so perfect strangers | ln4 smau
PAIRING: lando norris x private fem!reader SUMMARY: after getting completely splashed by a passing car, y/n throws all 'stranger danger' warnings out the window and hitches a ride home.
Instagram
yourusername posted to her story!
[ caption: OMFG THIS CAR JUST SPLASHED ME NOW I'M SOAKED😭😭😭 couldn't even see the driver ughh ]
[ caption: it's been almost 1 hr and i still look like a wet rat🙃 soo guess who's hitching a ride? (if i don't update within 2 hrs CALL THE POLICE PLS) ]
[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
Instagram
yourusername posted to her story!
[ caption: no need to worry anymore, your girl made it back home🙂↕️ ]
[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
Instagram
yourusername
liked by yourbestfriend, landonorris, yourfriend and 68 others
tagged: landonorris
yourusername "stranger danger" but not this one !! 🙂↕️
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yourfriend girl what- is this who I think it is???
yourusername 🤭🤭
yourbestfriend UHM DINNER TOOO????
yourusername messaging u rn girly🏃♀️🏃♀️
landonorris Again soon?👀
yourusername again tmrw? landonorris Again tomorrow. yourbestfriend what. the. fuck.
yourfriend pretty girl <33
(liked by author)
landonorris posted to his story!
[ caption: Day 2 ]
[ tagged: yourusername ]
Twitter
Instagram
yourusername posted to her story!
[ caption 1: mixing friend groups >>> ] [ caption 2: another day, another slay 🙂↕️ ]
[ tagged: landonorris, yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]
Tiktok
A couple days later...
yourusername posted to her close friends!
[ caption 1: lol ] [ caption 2: bye ]
Instagram
yourusername posted to her close friends!
[ caption 1: this is awkward ahaha... how about we all just forget about my silly goofy little story FOREVER AGO pretty please😁 ]
[ tagged: landonorris ]
story replies:
yourbestfriend "he's dead to me"🤡🤡
yourusername pfft tomato tomato right ahaha 😁
yourfriend folding after only 5 days is clown shit lmfao
yourfriend LMAOOO where did all that energy go??
yourusername new phone who dis😀
yourfriend Y/N STAND TF UP OMFG???
yourusername b-but pretty flowers🥺 yourfriend a lost cause I see...
yourfriend I spy with my little eye a whole damn circus!
yourfriend so real tbh
yourusername i knew you'd get me babe 🙂↕️
[ ... ]
yourusername posted to her close friends!
[ caption: STOP EATING ME UP IN THE REPLIES OMFG?? PLS FRIENDS I'M JUST A GIRLLL ]
A few months later...
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f1gossipofficial
liked by username, username, username, and 13,007 others
f1gossipofficial According to this picture sent to us by a fan in China, it seems Lando Norris has brought Y/N along with him for the upcoming Grand Prix.
The duo has been the subject of rumours and sightings together for a while now. Could this weekend finally mark the debut of a new wag?
They certainly appear close in the photo! 👀
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username just fell to my knees in walmart🧎♂️
username aw that picture is so cuteee i already love them together <33
username i feel like she's stuck up tbh cause i've been requesting to follow her for almost a month now and nothing. like girl you're not that important please😒
username uhmm...you're a weirdo username lmaooo how about you go live your life then if she isn't that important what💀
username I saw them too!! I asked for a pic with lando and she was super sweet and took it for us :)
username aw that makes me happy to hear username she did the same for me in monaco 🫶
username she gives bad vibes...
username y'all say that about everyone omg stfu
yourusername posted to her story!
[ caption 1: entering my lucky charm era hmm?👀 ] [ caption 2: AHHH P2 OMFG!!!! SO PROUD OF U LAN ❤️ ❤️ (you're welcome also 😌) ]
[ tagged: landonorris ]
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lando.jpg 🇨🇳
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username rip lando's single era 😞💔
username crying and throwing up fr
yourusername ❤️
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username day 593 of begging you to make your insta public🥹 username with the way y'all treated Luisa I doubt that will happen username who tf is y'all?🤨
username P2 LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO
username ik everyone's been hating but I actually like that y/n's super private bc it shows she's with him for the right reasons :)
username right she seems genuine 🫶
username so proud of you lando 🧡🧡
username LAST PIC SHOULD BE MEEE
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#f1 smau#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#lando norris#lando norris x reader#ln4#ln4 x reader#ln4 imagine#f1 imagine#ln4 x you#lando norris smau#lando norris x female reader#lando x y/n#lando x you#lando norris fanfic#smau#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagine#f1 instagram au#fanfic#f1 fic#lando x reader#ln4 fic#f1 scenario#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1#lando norris one shot#formula 1 x you
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⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚ Think Fast, You Only Get One Try - [Part 1]
♥ prev | next
♥ series masterlist | main masterlist
♥ pairing: lando norris x fem!reader
♥ chapter one synopsis: after almost two months it was finally time to tell lando about your daughter.
♥ smau + written - fc: girls on pinterest - none of the pictures are mine
♥ warnings: swearing !!!
♥ a/n: thank you so much for almost 400 followers and 1k+ notes on the intro <3 i really hope this part 1 lives up to your expectations! The next parts will have more smau and will ideally be longer (I just had to get the plot rolling with this first chapter lol)
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yourusername vroom vroom
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˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
You knocked on Lando’s penthouse apartment door, knowing there was no going back now. Bless your sister for being able to find where he lives in just a couple of minutes on the internet.
The man who opened the door wasn’t Lando, but Max Fewtrell. His gaze narrowed.
“Who are you?”
“I’m not sure if you remember me... but I met you and Lando at a club in Melbourne last year.”
His eyes saccaded between you and the baby you were holding.
"Lando," he shouted from the doorway. "Stay here. I'll go get him."
Max made his way to one of Lando's rooms, where he was talking to Oscar.
"There's a woman here to see you," he paused. "With a baby. She said she knew you from Melbourne last year."
Lando got up quickly and made his way to the front door. Once he got there, he stared at you and your daughter.
You nodded. "Her name is Camila."
He held his arms out, silently asking to hold her. After you handed Camila to him, he gently rocked her in his arms.
"Come in."
-
You had a very long conversation on the couch with Lando as his two friends eavesdropped from the hallway. They didn't even bother going into another room and closing the door.
"I want to be a part of her life, if that's okay with you?"
You nodded. "Could you start tomorrow?"
"What?" Lando blinked at you.
"My sitter quit, and I have work tomorrow. I checked your race calendar; you just got back from Japan and don't have to go to Shanghai until next week."
"Yeah, but I still have sim and training and-"
"You better hope your physical therapist knows how to rock a baby to sleep then," you said sternly.
"I can help if you want," Oscar piped up. "With Max and I, I'm sure you'll be able to spend some time with your daughter."
You smiled at Oscar. "I'll be leaving you in charge."
That statement elicited an eye roll out of Lando.
He shifted his gaze from Camila to you. "Alright, yeah, I'll take care of her for the next few days."
"Thank you," you placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'll drop her off tomorrow at 10?"
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-The Next Day-
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oscarpiastri babysitting duty
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user7 who's baby?
user3 oscar would be such a cute girl dad
lilyzniemer I agree
user1 🥹
user5 AWWW
user8 that should be me 😔
user2 holding your hand
user9 that should be me
user4 making you laugh
user12 you and lily are so cute :(
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
-first is lando's phone, second is yours-
˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁‧₊˚ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁˖
-A Week Later-
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landonorris life lately
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user7 Shanghai is soooo pretty
user9 so glad china back on the calendar
oscarpiastri proof that instagram is fake
maxfewtrell he's forgetting about sm REALLY important in his "life lately"
user8 ???
user2 @/oscarpiastri @/maxfewtrell what do you know
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#𝒍𝒊𝒗'𝒔 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒌𝒔 ౨ৎ#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x female reader#lando norris fluff#lando norris imagine#ln4 x reader#ln4 x you#ln4 x y/n#ln4 x female reader#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#dj lando#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula fanfic#formula 1 fic#formula one fanfic#f1 rpf#rpf#fake texts#f1 fluff#f1 smau#f1 social media au#fem reader#f1 instagram au
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