#moments like these are the ones that break you destroy you | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

fangdokja · 8 hours ago

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He’s your family, but he doesn’t act like it.

❤︎ Synopsis. In his eyes, she was never just a daughter—she was a possession, a fragile masterpiece, he would destroy the world to keep as his alone.

♡ Book. Forbidden Fruits: Intimate Obsessions, Unhinged Desires.

♡ Pairing. Yandere! Stepfather x Reader

♡ Novella. Paternal Privilege - Part 1

♡ Word Count. 5,879

♡ TW. incest, non-con, poverty, financial manipulation, psychological manipulation, mental conditioning, child abuse, slight voyeurism, non-con touching and kissing, toxic relationships, possessiveness, social isolation, dacryphilia, choking / breath play, lack of physical and relational boundaries, degradation, humiliation

♡ Note. Due to Tumblr content guidelines involving minors, some plot details of the original story were changed to fit the platform. If you want the true original story, please look at the author's official website or Ao3.

It started with the first mistake. A small one, insignificant by any standard except his own. Your fingers had brushed against his wallet as you attempted to slip it free from his coat. He caught your wrist before you could blink, the pressure of his grip a cold promise of retribution. You had snarled at him then, like a feral thing backed into a corner, your teeth bared despite your thin, malnourished frame. There was no pity in his expression as he looked down at you, only calculation.

“Interesting,” he had murmured, his voice devoid of warmth, as though he were examining a broken artifact. And then, after a moment’s pause, “I think I’ll keep you.”

The words had meant nothing to you then. Just another cruel twist of fate in a life already riddled with suffering. But over the years, their weight became unbearable, a chain you could never break. He had dragged you out of the filth and into his world of cold luxury, and you had learned quickly that safety was not synonymous with kindness.

No, the world had beaten that out of him long before you were ever born. What he offered was an exchange: safety for obedience, education for diligence, and resources for loyalty. You were to be molded, not cherished. Shaped, not nurtured. Your position in his house was not as a daughter but as a contingency—a blade sharpened for a task he hoped he would never have to assign you. He had an heir, after all. A son, crafted in his image, though far too reckless to carry the weight of his empire. And you? You were insurance.

But even insurance had to earn its place.

He was precise in everything he did, including the way he broke you. His methods were not born of cruelty for cruelty’s sake—he considered himself above such baseless indulgence. Instead, every punishment was calculated, a lesson delivered with surgical precision. The sharp crack of his voice was worse than any physical blow, each word stripping you down until the fire in your eyes flickered weakly, struggling to remain alight.

If he was pleased, he could be almost generous. A dress for a gala. A rare moment of praise. But those instances were so fleeting that you learned quickly not to crave them. Craving led to disappointment, and disappointment bred weakness. You had no use for it.

It would have been easier if he had hated you. Hatred, at least, could be understood. But no, his disdain for you was something more insidious—a quiet, festering annoyance that had grown over time, fed by your stubborn resilience. He had molded his empire with ruthless efficiency, bending men and markets alike to his will. Yet you, a filthy stray he should have discarded, continued to resist in ways that set his teeth on edge.

Your “brother,” however, had no such struggles. He moved through the household with a veneer of charm that fooled everyone but you. Behind his polished facade was a predator, his words slick with venom and his hands far too comfortable in places they shouldn’t have been. Your stepfather seemed blind to it—or perhaps he didn’t care. After all, his heir was above reproach, even if that heir was a misogynistic bastard who treated women like disposable trinkets. His failures were excused, his indulgences overlooked. Meanwhile, you bore the brunt of every misstep, every perceived slight, every ounce of anger your stepfather refused to direct at his golden child.

You were an itch beneath his skin, a flaw in his otherwise perfect calculations. He told himself that was all you were: a contingency plan, a tool. A sharp blade, forged under his watchful eye, meant to protect what he had built. Nothing more. Nothing else.

But even tools could tempt.

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He didn’t know when it began—the slow erosion of his detachment. Was it when you've just become of age?

Perhaps it was when you started to move with the grace he had demanded of you, each step deliberate, each word measured. Or perhaps it was when he saw the way others looked at you, their gazes lingering too long, their intentions transparent. He told himself it was annoyance, nothing more. A natural reaction to the idea that something he owned could be coveted by others.

He began watching you more closely, though his scrutiny was nothing new. He had always been a man of observation, his gaze piercing and unrelenting. But now, it was different. Now, it wasn’t just your mistakes he cataloged, but the way your lips parted when you spoke, the faint shiver that ran through you when his hand brushed yours during training, the fire in your eyes when you argued with him.

And, when his son cornered you in the study one evening, his hands grasping at what wasn’t his to take, the rage that burned in him was far from paternal. The sound of his cane striking the polished floor as he entered was enough to send the boy scurrying, but the fury in his eyes was directed not at his heir, but at you.

“You provoke him,” he said coldly, his voice low and dangerous. “With your defiance. Your insolence.”

You didn’t respond, your silence a shield you had long since perfected. But he wasn’t fooled. He had always known what simmered beneath your stoic facade. That fire he had spent years trying to extinguish still burned, faint but persistent, waiting for the chance to consume him.

He should have been disgusted by the thought, but disgust required a level of humanity he no longer possessed. What he felt instead was something far darker, an obsession that sank its claws into him and refused to let go.

He knew every inch of you—not just as a father knows a child, but as a man knows a woman.

And he hated it.

He hated the way your presence stirred something in him that should have stayed buried, hated the way his control slipped in the quiet moments when you were near. He should have been disgusted, ashamed. But shame required a conscience, and he had abandoned that long ago. Instead, he leaned into his desire, rationalizing it as yet another form of control. You were his, after all. He had taken you from nothing and given you everything. Your brilliance, your strength, your very survival—none of it would exist without him. What right did you have to deny him?

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The irritation began long before he realized it. It was insidious, threading itself into the fabric of his daily life, coloring every interaction with you until it became impossible to ignore. He would never admit it—not even to himself—but you had become a constant presence in his mind, a thorn he couldn’t remove no matter how deeply he buried the ache.

At first, he told himself it was logical. Practical. You were a tool, after all, and tools had to be maintained, watched, controlled. But over the years, his attention drifted from your utility to other things—smaller, infuriating details that gnawed at his composure. The way you carried yourself with an air of defiance, even when bowing your head in submission. The way your voice, sharp and cutting when you dared to speak back, lingered in his ears long after you’d been dismissed.

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The bathhouse was a room built for indulgence, decadence dripping from every polished tile and gilded faucet. Steam curled lazily in the air, clinging to the pristine walls and diffusing the soft, golden light that bathed the space in an unnatural warmth. The water shimmered like liquid silk, its surface disturbed only by the faint ripples of your movements.

You sat at the edge of the pool, your back straight and your chin raised with that same deadpan defiance he had come to both loathe and crave. You didn’t look at him, though you knew he was there. He always was, leaning against the doorframe with the weight of his presence pressing down on you like a vice. His gaze was as sharp as it was cold, raking over your exposed skin with clinical precision that belied the storm brewing behind his steely eyes.

“Strip,” he had commanded earlier, his voice devoid of inflection, as though the order were as routine as breathing. And perhaps it was, by now. You hadn’t protested—there was no point. You simply stared at him with that infuriatingly neutral expression of yours before complying, peeling away the layers of fabric with a mechanical detachment that mirrored his own.

He told himself this was necessary. Routine. Logical. He needed to ensure you were in peak condition, free of scars or weaknesses that could jeopardize your role in his carefully constructed empire. After all, you were an investment—a tool he had polished and sharpened to perfection.

But as his eyes traced the curve of your collarbone, the delicate jut of your ribs, and the subtle swell of flesh that hinted at a beauty he had tried to ignore; for the first time, he felt the first stirrings of something far more dangerous than annoyance.

Even at eighteen years old, you were thin, still too pale, too small; but at least you no longer the skeletal shadow he had first dragged from the gutter. The malnourishment that had once defined you had given way to a wiry strength, and though you were far from perfect, there was a resilience in the set of your jaw and the glint of your eyes that made his teeth clench. He hated it—the way you had clawed your way back to something resembling vitality, despite everything he had done to strip you down to nothing.

But he hated himself more. For looking too long. For noticing the faint sheen of water on your skin, the way the droplets clung to you like a second layer of clothing before slipping away, exposing more of you with every languid movement.

His fingers twitched at his sides, and he curled them into fists, the leather of his gloves creaking softly. He told himself it was irritation. Annoyance. That you were nothing more than a distraction—a necessary evil in a life that had no room for weakness. But the tightening in his chest, the heat pooling low in his abdomen, betrayed him.

“Bathe,” he ordered, his voice sharper than he intended. It cut through the silence like a blade, and you glanced at him for the briefest of moments before turning away, sliding into the water with a grace that made his stomach twist.

You didn’t speak as you began to wash, your movements efficient but unhurried. The water lapped at your skin, soft and inviting, and he hated the way it seemed to caress you in ways he could not. His eyes followed the path of your hands as they trailed over your arms, your neck, your shoulders—lingering on the places where flesh met bone, where softness gave way to strength.

There were no scars. No deformities. No imperfections to justify the intensity of his scrutiny. But he continued to watch, his expression a mask of indifference even as his thoughts spiraled into territory he refused to acknowledge.

You were beautiful. It was a truth he had avoided for as long as he could, but now, as the steam curled around you like a lover’s embrace, it was impossible to deny. The defiance in your eyes, the fire he had tried so desperately to extinguish, only made it worse. You were a contradiction—soft and hard, fragile and unyielding—and it made him want to tear you apart just to see what lay beneath.

His jaw tightened as he pushed off the doorframe, stepping closer to the edge of the bath. You didn’t look up, but he could see the way your shoulders tensed, the subtle shift in your posture that betrayed your awareness of his presence. It was a small victory, but it was enough to stoke the embers of his control.

“Raise your arms,” he said, his voice cold and clinical, though the command lingered in the air like a challenge. You obeyed without hesitation, lifting your arms above your head in a gesture that left you vulnerable, exposed.

He crouched beside the bath, his gloved hand brushing against your skin as he examined you with the precision of a craftsman inspecting his work. His touch was impersonal, detached, but the heat of your skin seeped through the thin layer of leather, setting his nerves alight. He traced the lines of your muscles, the curve of your spine, the delicate ridge of your ribs, searching for flaws that didn’t exist.

“You’ve improved,” he muttered, more to himself than to you. “At least you’re not the walking corpse you once were.”

Your lips twitched, the ghost of a smirk tugging at the corners of your mouth. “I aim to please,” you said, your tone as deadpan as your expression.

He hated that, too. The way you could needle him with so little effort, even when you were at his mercy. It made him want to crush you, to shatter the carefully constructed walls you hid behind and leave you trembling in his hands.

But instead, he stood abruptly, his movements sharp and decisive. “Finish quickly,” he snapped, turning on his heel. “I don’t have all night.”

As he walked away, his fists clenched at his sides, he told himself this was the last time. That he would not let you crawl under his skin again.

But he knew it was a lie.

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You were a nuisance. A distraction.

He hated distractions.

He watched you more closely than he should have, his irritation mounting with every interaction. Your silence grated on him, as did the fire behind your eyes when you thought he wasn’t paying attention. You were ungrateful, insubordinate, stubborn to a fault—and yet, there was something about you that held his gaze longer than he liked.

It disgusted him, or so he claimed. But the disgust felt hollow, an excuse to mask the truth he didn’t want to face.

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One evening, he found himself lingering in the doorway of the study, watching as you hunched over a stack of reports he’d ordered you to prepare. The soft glow of the lamp cast your features in sharp relief, highlighting the set of your jaw and the delicate curve of your neck. His irritation flared at the sight of you, so focused, so determined to meet his impossible standards.

“You’re late,” he said, his voice cutting through the silence like a blade.

You startled, your pen slipping from your fingers, and he felt a flicker of satisfaction at the way your shoulders tensed.

“I’ll finish soon,” you replied, your voice steady but low. Controlled. Carefully devoid of emotion.

He hated that, too—the way you had learned to mask your feelings around him. It was a skill he’d forced upon you, and yet now it only served to irritate him further. He wanted to see you break, to hear your voice tremble with fear or anger or anything that betrayed the composure you clung to so desperately.

“Soon isn’t good enough,” he snapped, stepping into the room and letting the door close behind him. The click of the latch seemed louder in the silence, a reminder that you were alone with him now.

You didn’t look up, your hands clenching into fists on the desk. The tension in your posture was subtle but unmistakable, and it only fueled his annoyance.

“Look at me,” he ordered, his tone low and dangerous.

You hesitated, and that hesitation was enough to set his teeth on edge. When you finally raised your eyes to meet his, he saw the defiance flickering there, faint but still alive. He had tried so hard to extinguish it, to strip you of the stubborn fire that made you so infuriatingly difficult to control. But it remained, smoldering just beneath the surface, and it filled him with a rage he couldn’t fully explain.

“Do you enjoy testing me?” he asked, his voice softening into something almost conversational, though the edge of danger remained. “Is that what this is? A game to see how far you can push before I break you?”

You said nothing, but your silence was answer enough.

He crossed the room in three deliberate strides, his hand slamming down on the desk beside you. The force of the impact made you flinch, and for a moment, he savored the flicker of fear that crossed your face.

“You’re mine,” he said, the words escaping before he could stop them. His voice was low, almost a growl, and the intensity of his own admission startled him. “Every breath you take, every thought in that insolent little head of yours—it all belongs to me.”

Your lips parted as if to protest, but no sound came out. He leaned closer, his presence overwhelming, the scent of leather and smoke filling your senses.

“You think you can hide from me,” he continued, his voice dropping to a whisper. “Pretend to be obedient while plotting your escape. I know you, girl. I know what’s underneath that mask you wear. And I promise you, if you ever try to leave me, I will make sure you regret it.”

The threat hung in the air between you, heavy and suffocating. He straightened, his hand brushing against your cheek as he pulled back. The touch was brief, almost accidental, but it left a trail of heat in its wake that made your stomach churn.

“Finish your work,” he said coldly, turning away. “And don’t make me wait again.”

As he left the room, his irritation simmered beneath the surface, mingling with something darker. He told himself it was just annoyance, that you were nothing more than a tool—a disobedient, infuriating tool that he would one day bend to his will completely.

But deep down, he knew the truth. You were more than that. And it infuriated him.

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The air in the university courtyard carried a deceptive warmth, laced with the chatter and laughter of students unwinding after a long day. He stood in the shadow of a column, his broad frame hidden by the angle of the building, his piercing gaze fixed on you. You were seated on the low stone ledge of a fountain, and for once, the frigid wall you carried in your demeanor seemed to have melted.

He couldn’t tear his eyes away from you. The faint, almost imperceptible curve of your lips wasn’t the cold smirk of defiance he had grown used to, nor was it the bored, deadpan expression that often made him feel like you were barely holding onto existence. No, this was different. Your eyes, usually dulled with exhaustion or indifference, sparkled as if illuminated by a light he had never seen before. It was a look he had never managed to elicit from you—not through his cruelty, not through his control, not even through his calculated acts of kindness designed to bind you closer to him.

And the reason for it was standing in front of you. A young man, tall but wiry, with an unpolished charm that radiated in the way he spoke, gesturing animatedly with his hands as he recounted some inane story. You were listening, fully enraptured, even leaning in slightly as though you didn’t want to miss a single word. When he said something particularly idiotic, you laughed—a soft, almost breathless sound that struck him like a blow to the chest.

He could feel the storm brewing inside him, dark and consuming. The rage was almost chemical, rushing through his veins and clawing at his composure. You had never laughed like that for him. Not once. Even in your moments of forced obedience, your submission was mechanical, begrudging, and full of resistance. But here you were, glowing in the presence of someone who was nothing more than a pathetic shadow of a man—soft where he was hard, open where he was closed.

He couldn’t stand it.

He had already investigated the idiot, of course. A second-year student in your entrepreneurship program, the type to coast by on charm and mediocre effort, his assignments always late but forgiven by professors who couldn’t resist his charisma. He was everything that disgusted him: undisciplined, carefree, and lacking in the ruthlessness it took to truly succeed. And yet, somehow, this fool had managed to reach a part of you that he never could.

The realization cut deeper than he wanted to admit. It wasn’t just the jealousy—though it burned like acid in his throat—it was the sense of failure. He had spent years shaping you, breaking you, molding you into something that belonged to him and him alone. You were his creation, his possession, his daughter in name, though he could never see you as just that. He had taken everything from you—your freedom, your choices, your innocence—and yet, this man had managed to plant a seed of rebellion in you with nothing more than a few smiles and an open heart.

That night, he sat in his study, the light from the fireplace casting sharp shadows across his face. His fingers drummed against the edge of his desk, a restless, impatient rhythm that betrayed the turmoil within. He had always prided himself on his control, his ability to suppress the baser instincts that threatened to consume him. But this…this was different.

He hated the way his thoughts circled back to you, to the softness in your expression as you had listened to that fool, to the way your lips had parted in awe when he made some insignificant observation about life. It wasn’t the you he knew—the cold, detached creature who met his cruelty with deadpan defiance. No, this was someone he didn’t recognize. Someone he couldn’t control.

He clenched his jaw, the tension in his body coiling tighter and tighter until it felt like he might snap. The rage wasn’t enough to drown out the darker thoughts that lurked beneath it—the shameful, forbidden desires he had buried deep, convincing himself they didn’t exist. But now, as he replayed the scene in his mind, those thoughts clawed their way to the surface, insistent and unrelenting.

He told himself it was for your own good when he decided to tighten his hold on you. He would sever this connection before it could take root, crush whatever fragile feelings had begun to bloom in your chest, and remind you who you belonged to. You were his, whether you realized it or not.

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The next morning, when he came to fetch you from the university, his presence was a storm cloud that seemed to darken the air around him. Students parted like the Red Sea as he walked through the campus, his cold, predatory gaze fixed ahead. When he found you, standing once again with that insufferable idiot, the corners of your mouth lifting in what could almost be described as a smile, something inside him snapped.

“Get in the car,” he said, his voice low and even, though it carried a weight that made you falter. The warmth in your expression faded instantly, replaced by the detached indifference he had come to expect.

The young man—stupid, oblivious—had the audacity to laugh. “Wow, strict parent much?” he joked, oblivious to the way your guardian’s eyes narrowed, sharp enough to cut.

You didn’t look at him as you walked toward the car, your movements stiff and deliberate. But he saw the way your hands clenched at your sides, the way your shoulders tensed as if bracing for what was to come.

When you were alone in the car, the silence was suffocating. His hands gripped the steering wheel with white-knuckled intensity, the tension radiating off him in waves.

“What was that?” he asked finally, his voice calm but deadly.

“What was what?” you replied, your tone as flat and detached as ever.

His jaw tightened, and he glanced at you out of the corner of his eye. “Don’t play dumb with me.”

You didn’t respond, your gaze fixed out the window as though you could will yourself to be anywhere but here.

That was when he reached over, his hand gripping your chin with a force that bordered on painful, forcing you to look at him. His eyes burned with an intensity that made your breath catch, and for the first time, you saw something unhinged lurking beneath the surface of his carefully constructed facade.

“You’re mine,” he said, his voice low and menacing. “Don’t you ever forget that.”

You didn’t flinch, but the flicker of fear in your eyes was enough to stoke the flames of his control. He released you abruptly, his expression smoothing into a mask of cold detachment.

But the storm inside him raged on.

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The car rolled to a halt in the shadow of the sprawling mansion, the silence that followed heavy and oppressive. The engine hummed faintly before he turned it off, his movements measured, deliberate, and yet brimming with barely contained fury. You sat beside him, your posture rigid, your hands resting lifelessly in your lap. You didn’t look at him. You didn’t need to. The seething heat radiating from his side of the car was palpable, and you knew what was coming.

He didn’t speak at first, letting the silence stretch and tighten around you like a noose. The interior of the car seemed smaller than usual, suffocating. You could feel the weight of his gaze on you, sharp and dissecting, and you fought the urge to shift under it. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you squirm.

But then he began.

“You’re a fool,” he said, his voice calm and steady, like a blade sliding effortlessly between your ribs. “Do you know that? A naïve, reckless little fool who doesn’t even understand the world she’s playing in.”

You didn’t respond. You never did. His words washed over you like acid rain, eating away at whatever feeble defenses you had managed to build, but you wouldn’t let him see it. Your face remained impassive, your gaze fixed on the dashboard.

“Do you even comprehend the danger you put yourself in?” he continued, his tone sharpening like the edge of a knife. “Do you have any idea what kind of people would love to take advantage of someone like you? Or are you so desperate for attention that you’ll throw yourself at the first imbecile who shows you a shred of interest?”

Your jaw tightened, the only sign that his words were cutting deeper than you wanted to admit. He noticed, of course. He noticed everything.

“That’s it, isn’t it?” he pressed, leaning closer to you, his voice dropping to a low, venomous hiss. “You crave validation so much that you’re willing to make a spectacle of yourself. Laughing, smiling—sparkling like some lovesick little girl. Do you have any idea how pathetic you looked?”

His words hit their mark, but you refused to let them sink in. You stared straight ahead, your expression a mask of indifference.

“Look at me,” he commanded, his voice cold and biting.

You didn’t move.

“I said, look at me.”

This time, his hand shot out, gripping your chin with bruising force and turning your head to face him. His eyes bore into yours, icy and unrelenting, and for a moment, you thought you saw something flicker in their depths. Rage, yes, but something darker, something hungrier.

“You don’t get to ignore me,” he said, his voice low and menacing. “Not after the display you put on today. Not after humiliating me with your stupidity.”

“I didn’t do anything,” you said, your voice flat, your tone carefully devoid of emotion.

“Exactly,” he snapped. “You did nothing to protect yourself. You did nothing to consider the consequences of your actions. You think that fool you’ve been wasting your time with sees you as anything more than a conquest? A challenge? Someone to use and discard the moment you’re no longer interesting?”

His words were harsh, cutting, but there was an undercurrent of something deeper, something raw and unspoken.

“You think I don’t know what he sees when he looks at you?” he continued, his grip on your chin tightening. “You think I don’t see it too?”

The admission hung in the air, heavy and suffocating, and for a moment, the mask of control he always wore seemed to crack. But then it was gone, replaced by the cold, calculated detachment that had always defined him.

“You disgust me,” he said finally, releasing your chin with a flick of his wrist as though even touching you was a burden. “And yet, here I am, cleaning up your mess, protecting you from your own stupidity. Do you know why that is?”

You didn’t answer.

“Because you’re mine,” he said, his voice low and dangerous. “And no one—least of all that idiotic boy—gets to take what’s mine.”

The silence that followed was deafening, broken only by the faint ticking of the car’s cooling engine. You wanted to scream, to cry, to lash out at him, but you did none of those things. Instead, you stared out the window, your expression blank, your heart pounding in your chest.

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The weight of his control lingered in the suffocating air as you reached for the car door handle, desperate to escape the storm of his presence. But you barely had time to process the thought before his hand shot out, knotting itself in your hair with a cruel precision. His grip was tight, the sting of his fingers digging into your scalp sharp enough to draw a gasp from your lips—a sound he drank in greedily as his other hand yanked you back toward him.

Then his mouth was on yours.

It wasn’t a kiss in any romantic sense. No tenderness, no warmth. Just heat and fury, the brutal claim of a man too far gone in his own obsession. His lips crushed against yours with a ferocity that made you jerk back instinctively, but he followed, his grip tightening as he tangled his fingers further into your hair, forcing you to remain where he wanted. His teeth caught your lower lip, dragging, biting hard enough that the copper tang of blood burst across your tongue. You choked on the sensation, on the taste, on him.

Your resistance, fragile as it had been, shattered entirely. The rigid mask you’d held together cracked beneath his onslaught, leaving you vulnerable, raw. The disgust, the anger, the helpless rage—all of it spilled out, written across your features in a way you couldn’t hide. And he reveled in it.

He deepened the kiss, his tongue pushing past your lips with a savage dominance, exploring, claiming every inch of you like a conqueror. There was no room to breathe, no room to think. His free hand found your jaw, holding you in place as his lips bruised yours, as his tongue tasted the fear and hatred you didn’t dare voice. You clawed at his arm, your nails raking against his skin, desperate to make him stop, to push him away. But it was like trying to move a mountain.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

The metallic taste of blood mingled with the faint sweetness of your own breath, a combination that set something alight in him. You could feel it in the way he pressed closer, caging you against the car seat, his body a fortress of unrelenting heat and muscle. He was consuming you, branding you in ways that no one else ever would. Because he wouldn’t allow it.

This was your first kiss. And he made sure it would be unforgettable—for all the wrong reasons.

When he finally pulled back, his movements were deliberate, controlled, like a predator savoring the aftermath of the hunt. But he didn’t move far. His forehead almost brushed yours, his lips still ghosting over your trembling mouth, close enough that you could feel the heat of his breath, could see the faint smirk curving his bloodstained lips.

You were a wreck—wide-eyed, your cheeks flushed a traitorous red, your chest heaving as you tried to catch the air he’d stolen. Tears pricked the corners of your eyes, blurring your vision as you stared at him, as his expression remained infuriatingly composed.

“Look at you,” he murmured, his voice low, almost tender if not for the cruel edge that laced every word. “Pathetic. So easy to break. So easy to ruin.”

You turned your head away, but his hand caught your chin again, forcing you back to face him. The movement made the raw sting at your scalp flare, but you didn’t have the energy to fight.

“Don’t,” he growled. “Don’t look away from me. You wanted to act like a fool, and now you’ll deal with the consequences.”

His thumb traced your jaw, deceptively gentle, before he tilted your face toward him, studying you like you were some fragile, precious thing. But his eyes… there was nothing gentle in them. Just that icy hunger that terrified you more than his words ever could.

“This is a lesson,” he said, his tone clinical, as if he were dissecting the very essence of you. “You need to understand the danger of men. Of what they’ll do when you’re so oblivious, so unguarded. But they won’t get to you. Do you know why?”

You shook your head weakly, your voice stolen.

“Because they’ll never have the chance,” he continued, his lips brushing the shell of your ear now, his voice dropping to a cold whisper. “You belong to me. Do you understand? You’re mine. Your smiles, your tears, your body—everything. And I will kill anyone who dares to take what’s mine.”

The words were a promise, spoken with the kind of chilling finality that left no room for argument.

And then, just as abruptly as he’d started, he released you.

“Get out,” he said finally, his voice cold and dismissive.

The sudden absence of his touch was almost as jarring as the assault of it had been, leaving you scrambling to recover, to collect the fragments of yourself he’d shattered. You pushed the car door open, stumbling out into the cold night air. Your legs felt unsteady beneath you, your heart a panicked drumbeat in your chest as you ran toward the mansion without looking back.

But even as you fled, you could feel his gaze on you, heavy and unrelenting. You didn’t dare stop, didn’t dare turn around.

From the car, he watched you, his expression a mask of cool detachment. But inside, he was burning, the lingering taste of you on his lips like gasoline to a fire. He let himself admire the way you moved—unsteady, vulnerable, utterly his. And he smiled, a dark, satisfied thing.

Fear suited you. Fear made you his.

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List of Fandoms and Characters

Ace Attorney: Barok van Zieks

Blue Lock: Jinpachi Ego, Michael Kaiser, Rin Itoshi, Sae Itoshi

Boku no Hero Academia: Dabi, Endeavor, Shouto Todoroki

Brutal: Satsujin Kansatsukan no Kokuhaku: N/A

Death Note: Light Yagami

Demon Slayer: Muzan Kibutsuji

Dishonored Series: Anton Sokolov, Daud

Genshin Impact: Dainsleif, Zhongli (Rex Lapis / Morax)

Haikyuu!!: Kei Tsukishima, Wakatoshi Ushijima

Honkai Star Rail: Blade, Sunday

How to Live as an Illegal Healer: N/A

Hunter x Hunter: Illumi Zoldyck

I'm Not That Kind of Talent: Duke Illuster Starbe, Nemeseus

Jujutsu Kaisen: Kenjaku, Ryomen Sukuna

Kill The Hero: Park Yong-Wan, Se Jun-Lee

Mobile Legends: Bang Bang: Aamon

Naruto Shippuden: Madara Uchiha

One Punch Man: Boros

Reverend Insanity: Fang Yuan

TOUCHSTARVED: N/A

Undertale Multiverse (Human AU): Error! Sans, Ink! Sans, Nightmare! Sans

Wuthering Waves: Geshu Lin

Your Throne: Eros Orna Vasilios

────────────

If you want to be added or removed from the tag list, just comment on the MASTERLIST of Forbidden Fruits: Intimate Obsessions, Unhinged Desires. Thank you.

General TAG LIST: @uniquecutie-puffs , @ikevampharem , @tnsophiaonly , @mokingbrd78k , @cooldeermagazine , @mimitk , @xileonaaaa

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thewitchblue · 3 hours ago

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"Are you... reading Twilight?"

You had asked Jason, who broke into your apartment while you were gone grocery shopping. He only gave you a hum and continued reading as you set your grocery bags on your kitchen table.

You watched him turn the page and felt a sense of dread. It was your copy from when you were 13 years old. It had notes and doodles in the margins. Did he read your notes? Of course he would. He reads the annotated versions of Jane Austen he has for fun. Why wouldn't he read your notes? The world seemed to be against you this day.

You were so mortified you didn't even hear him laugh at a doodle you had of Edward biting a dog with the word "nom" next to it. He was almost done with the book.

You've only been dating for a handful of months. Would the notes break up your relationship? You don't remember the majority of them.

You haven't touched the trilogy since school, and you originally didn't even want to read it. The social pressure from your friends became to be too much, and it felt like a religious experience at the time.

You had forgotten about the book entirely in the years you've had it crammed in a bookcase next to the rest of the series, which, with great horror, you saw he also pulled out to read.

"Don't tell me you're enjoying the book."

You said in disbelief. The memories run through your head of your blushing cheeks at simple words on pages while the girls ganged up on you to ask which team your on. What team is Jason on? Or has he read this before behind closed doors? He shrugged and simply replied,

"I am."

You wanted to bolt out the door, but you had melting limited addition candy cane ice cream in your grocery bag.

Instead of running away, you bravely start putting away your groceries with your eyes trained on Jason. He seemed to genuinely enjoy your trashy romance book that's so incredibly dated. This is so bizarre to you. He's a fan of the classics and loves books that he can revisit without cringing.

The book appeared partially destroyed by the abyss of your backpack with a torn cover and a broken spine, but it drew Jason's attention. Of course, it would draw his attention. He always said a well loved book is one you take everywhere. A book with a broken spine and torn cover is going to make him curious.

He never had the normal teenage phase, so he's never read the book. He was curious, and he was rewarded so far. He understands now why teenagers like the trilogy so far.

You decided to break into the ice cream. You tensed at every page turned. What did you write in there? You tried to remember. You vaguely remember writing "yummy muscles" on a page. You cringed. Oh, the horrors of a horny teen.

The ice cream was as delicious as you expected it to be. How could you look him in the eyes ever again? Will he tell the whole family? You were stress eating.

Jason finished the book and went to pick up the next one, but you plucked it out of his hands before he could open it and grabbed the final book as well.

"I'm seriously going to throw these in the shredder."

Jason smirked at you. He enjoyed your little doodles and notes. It was as if he was meeting you when you were kids. He pointed out,

"I think they are too big to shred, pipsqueak."

You pouted, which only made him more amused. He pulled you into his lap and kissed your cheek. You huffed,

"I can still try."

He laughed. You were so adorable. He might have to embarrass you more. He murmured to you,

"I especially enjoyed your note of 'delicious dog meat.'"

You groaned and held your face in your hands, making the books fall to the floor. You hated your past self in this moment. Why did you keep those books? For Jason to show up and read them?

The feeling of dread eventually went away the more he kissed you. You filed away the fact you can know for a fact Jason read Twilight now, and part of you wondered if he'll spiral into the hellscape of fanfiction as a result. You are going to burn those books.

You like to think you ended up with a better love story than Twilght. Sure, you may be dating a zombie instead of a vampire or werewolf like teen you had wanted (if we can have Superman, we can have a sexy vampire or werewolf), but your zombie is perfect in his own ways.

#jason todd x reader #gn reader

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cosmicdahlias · 5 hours ago

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Christmas Across the Rio Grande

Logan Howlett x Reader

MINORS DNI

Christmas has come and you’re spending it getting drunk with an old, hardened Logan.

tags: age gap, alcohol use, drunk sex, couch sex, p in v, unprotected sex, creampie

sooo timeline-wise this takes place at the end of 2028. i tried to do my best research as to when caliban comes into the picture and there wasn’t much, but from what i’ve read it seems logan recruited him some time in 2029, so he will not be in this fic. sorry for posting a christmas fic a day late, i only got the idea for this two days ago 😭

Life had not been the same in months. Charles Xavier, once head and founder of Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters, had developed dementia, leading to frequent destructive telepathic seizures. One such seizure became known as the Westchester Incident, leaving the school destroyed, many injured, and some of your fellow mutants dead.

Having grown up in an orphanage until aging out of the system and spending the first eight years of adulthood on the streets, Charles was the closest thing you’d ever had to a father and the school was the only place that ever truly felt like home. In such a short time you had lost both. Even though Charles was still very much alive, the dementia left him a shell of his former self.

After Westchester the United States government declared Charles’ brain as a “weapon of mass destruction”, leaving you and another mutant to take him and go on the run, fleeing to an abandoned smelting plant in Mexico just across the Rio Grande.

The other mutant was the notorious Wolverine, Logan Howlett. For reasons unknown to you, his appearance had changed dramatically in the last five years. Despite not being able to age he looked like he’d gone from forty to sixty in record time.

Since escaping with you and Charles to Mexico, Logan had taken to going by “James”, his actual name, and worked as a limo driver in the border city of El Paso. He would regularly smuggle in the drugs to keep Charles’ seizures at bay.

In the days before Westchester you were never fond of Logan. He was a loner, seeming to keep everyone at arm’s length, save for those he would bed. Perhaps it was his tendencies towards promiscuity when he claimed to be in love with Jean Grey, a married woman, that irked you more than his personality.

He was passed around the mansion so frequently that from what you’d heard there were times he accidentally “double booked” himself. There was a part of you, buried somewhere deep, that harbored a resentment towards him for never seeking out your affections like he did for nearly any other adult with a pulse.

Living in close proximity since being thrust into exile with him had softened your opinions considerably. The shared trauma of losing everything and everyone had brought you two closer, as close as he would allow.

December was coming to an end. The nights were blisteringly cold and the winds only served to make them colder. The poorly insulated, run-down plant did little to protect you from the elements.

You were heading back inside from painstakingly, but successfully, attempting to medicate Charles. The heavy gales howled, making it a struggle to close the door before finally managing slam it shut. You turned around to see Logan sitting on the couch, bottle of whiskey in hand. He was wearing his typical non-work attire, a white tank top and jeans.

“He finally down?” He asked.

“For now, I swear those drugs used to knock him out for longer. He wouldn’t stop going on about Taco Bell for some reason.”

“Yeah, he uh… he does that a lot now.”

You gave a heavy sigh.

“It just sucks because it makes those moments where he acts like himself again hurt more.”

“What’d he say this time?”

“He just- I don’t know- whenever he actually says my name I know it’s him in there. Most of the time he calls me Jean, but I-“ your voice began to break “I don’t know how much more of this I can take Logan, watching his mind wither away into nothing.” You said, tears forming in your eyes.

For a moment you swore you saw a flicker of concern spread across his face.

“I’m thinking of bringing in some extra help.” He said.

“And what? We risk someone else knowing that we’re harboring a fugitive?”

“With me working that leaves you as the only one here most of the time. If god forbid something happens while I’m out and he hurts you, what then?”

You fell silent. He was right, you couldn’t keep caring for Charles alone when his seizures could be so dangerous and unpredictable. You had no rebuttal.

“Fine, but finding another mutant won’t be easy.”

“I’m well aware, but I’m done talking business, you look like you could use a drink.”

Logan extended out his bottle of whiskey, a rare invitation for you to join him. You smirked and took it.

“Look at you actually wanting to interact with someone for once.”

“Don’t make me regret it.”

You sat next to him on the moth-eaten couch, drinking a few shots worth from the bottle.

“Thirsty?” Logan asked with a cocked brow.

“Shut up, it’s been a long day.” You retorted, downing another shot and handing the bottle back to him.

Between the two of you the whiskey was finished within half an hour, leaving you significantly intoxicated, him slightly less so. When drunk Logan was far more open, and for the first time since Westchester you actually saw him smile. As the night progressed the two of you reminisced about life before Mexico and shared life stories you hadn’t told each other.

“A cage fighter?” You giggled.

“Yeah, went by Wolverine back then too.”

“Wow, too lazy to even try to come up with another name?” You teased as you looked down at your phone and read the time, midnight of the 25th.

“Oh shit, it’s already Christmas.” You said.

“Honestly wouldn’t have known if you didn’t say anything, the days just run together at this point.”

“No kidding, everything’s so different now.”

“… Yeah.”

A wistful silence hung in the air for a moment before you spoke.

“You know it’s hard not to miss the holidays back at the school… can’t say I miss Jean’s cooking though. I know how you felt about her, but that woman could not season food to save her life. I’m pretty sure she thought salt was too spicy.”

Logan gave a chuckle.

“Can’t disagree with you on that one.”

“I think what I miss most was seeing the kids all happy on Christmas morning, growing up in an orphanage I never got that for myself. Thanks to Bobby they always had a good snowball fight.”

“I miss that kid. Him and Rogue.”

“Kid? They were both pushing 40.” You laughed.

“They were kids when I met them and that’s always how I’ll remember them. Especially Rogue.”

“I always thought she saw you as like a father figure.”

“She definitely did, no matter how many times I told her not to.”

“I miss her so much, she was the first one other than Charles to make me feel like I belonged there. Fuck, I just miss all of them. It was only five years, but it was the best damn five years of my life, actually having something like a family.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean.”

You gave a wry smile.

“And in the end out of all of the X-Men to be stuck with of course it had to be you.” You teased, elbowing him playfully.

“You say that like it’s a joke, but you really had it in for me.”

“I mean I did, but you didn’t exactly come off as a nice guy.”

“I can be a nice guy, you just never tried to get to know me.”

“Would you have let me though?”

“Maybe.”

He looked at you in a way you’d never seen from him before, it made your heart do a backflip.

“You know, even if I wasn’t crazy about you back then I’m glad you’re here with me.” You said.

Logan raised a brow.

“Why’s that?”

“Because as much as I hate to say it, I’ve grown to like you.”

“A mistake honestly.” He chuckled.

A cold desert wind suddenly blew against dilapidated smelting plant. Frigid air crept in through the gaps in the walls, eliciting a shiver as it hit you.

“Cold?” Logan asked.

“Y- yeah.“

“Alright, c’mere.”

Logan pulled you against him, wrapping his arms around you. His body radiated an incredible amount of heat, a more than welcoming feeling in the bitter temperatures.

“Holy shit, you’re like a fucking furnace.” You said.

“Yeah? You like it?”

“God yes.”

His hands began to wander down to the small of your back. You traced the outline of his pecs with your fingertips. He looked at you, eyes betraying an intense desire as he cupped your cheek, coming in close.

“Merry Christmas, Logan.” You whispered as his lips met yours.

Starting slow and soft, Logan’s kisses quickly turned more passionate, a distinct hunger to them. He moved his hands to your waist, pulling you onto his lap. You felt his hard cock press into you through his jeans. You rolled your hips against him, causing him to let out a growl. He lowered his head, kissing and gingerly biting your neck. You moaned as his teeth scraped against the soft skin.

His hands began to drift to the hem of your shirt, gathering the fabric in his fingers and slowly lifting it over your head. He unclasped your bra, sliding the straps off your arms and tossing its aside. You watched his eyes take in the curvature of your breasts.

“Good fuckin’ god, you’re perfect.” He whispered, cupping one of your breasts and circling the nipple with his thumb.

Logan’s hands fell to your hips, tugging down your jeans until they landed on the floor with your shirt. His fingers circled your clit over your panties, the thin barrier of fabric did little to keep you from turning into a whimpering mess.

“Goddam, I love those little noises.“

Logan dipped his head down to kiss your neck again, you moaned and began to grind yourself against him.

“Hmm, getting excited there, princess? Feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Uh-huh.” You whimpered.

“Yeah? Let me make it feel even better for you, babygirl.”

Logan hooked his thumbs in the waistband of your panties, sliding them off your legs. He slipped a hand between your thighs, dragging his fingers along the slit of your dripping pussy.

“So wet and worked up for me.”

Logan returned his fingers to your clit, you dug your nails into his shoulders, the feeling of direct stimulation was almost too overwhelming. It had been far too long since you were last touched like this, or even touched yourself. You weren’t going to last much longer.

“F- fuck, I’m- I’m so close.”

“There you go, that’s it. Cum for me, princess.”

Logan pulled you into a kiss with his free hand as you came undone on his fingers, the electric pulses of your orgasm surging through you.

“Oh god, Logan.” You moaned against his mouth.

Logan kissed you aggressively as your orgasm faded. He dropped his head to your breasts, peppering kisses to them as he spoke.

“God, you’re so hot when you cum. You need to see what you’re doing to me, babygirl.”

Logan’s hands moved to his belt, unbuckling it, he unzipped his jeans and freed his already throbbing cock from his boxers. Logan took your hand in his, guiding it to wrap around his shaft. You gathered beads of precum from his head, using it to lubricate the length of his cock as you stroked him.

“Fuuuck, your hand feels good, but I need that pussy. You wanna ride me, princess?”

You nodded.

“That’s my good girl.”

You shifted yourself to hover just above is cock, sinking down onto him, barely taking more than his head before wincing as you felt his massive girth stretch you wide.

“You alright?” Logan asked.

“Y- yeah, just been a while. Not used to one this big either.”

“Then take it slow, princess. Don’t rush it.”

You continued to lower yourself onto his cock, following his instructions to go slow. A small shudder escaped his lips.

“Fuckin’ Christ, you’re so tight.”

You reached the hilt of his shaft, feeling him throb inside you as you began to lift and drop your hips.

“Attagirl, just like that. Nice and easy.” Logan said, his hands moving to your waist, pulling you closer.

“Christ, living with you was starting to drive me crazy. I could barely take seeing you in the summer, your ass in those little shorts. You don’t know how many times I had to jerk off because of you.”

You blushed and whimpered at the thought of Logan getting so worked up over you.

“Hmm, you like that, babygirl? You like knowing you made this old man stroke his fat fuckin’ cock to you?” He grunted as he grabbed your hips, thrusting up into you.

You nodded.

“Use your words, princess.”

“Y- yes, sir.”

“Good girl.”

You moved yourself up and down on his cock, sliding him all the way out until only the head remained before taking his full length back deep inside you. Logan’s eyes wandered over every inch of body. His hand moved to one of your breasts.

“Fuck, I can’t get enough of these tits, and this ass.” He growled.

He raised his hand and brought it down sharply on your ass, eliciting a yelp.

“Sorry, princess, couldn’t help myself.”

“N- no it’s okay, I like it.”

“Oh? You like it rough, huh?”

“Y- yeah.”

“Well, guess I gotta fuck you senseless then.”

In one swift motion Logan grabbed you by the waist, picking you up and throwing you down onto the couch on your back with him on top of you. You barely had a second to adjust to the new position before he forced every inch of himself inside you. He pinned your wrists above your head as he fucked you with a punishing speed.

“How’s that feel? Am I rough enough for you, princess?”

“Y- yeah. F- feels so good.”

“Attagirl.”

Logan’s breathing hitched, his hips stuttering.

“Christ, that tight little pussy’s gonna make me fuckin’ cum. Where do you want it, babygirl?” Logan panted.

“In me, I need you to cum in me. Please.” You whined.

“Jesus, I know you’re not on the pill, but keep begging like that and I’ll have to knock you up.”

“Oh god, please. I don’t care if we’re unprotected. I need it, fucking breed me.” You pleaded.

Your words ignited something within him. He thrusted furiously into you at a blinding pace, his breathing becoming ragged and heavy. He leaned down and sank his teeth into your neck and gave a loud growl, slamming the full length of his cock inside you as he came hot, thick ropes deep in you.

Logan gave a last few thrusts, his breathing beginning to settle. He pressed his forehead to yours.

“Jesus Christ, princess, it’s been way too damn long since someone’s made me feel that good. I hope you know this is not a one time thing, you’re fuckin’ mine now.”

You laced your fingers in his salt and pepper hair, kissing him passionately. He pulled out and you moved to dress yourself, but were interrupted by him grabbing your waist.

“No princess, you’re staying with me.”

He picked you up and carried you to his room, setting you down on the bed. He laid next to you, pulling you to him with your head against his chest. Between the exhaustion of the day and the warmth radiating from Logan, you felt your eyelids grow heavy. He kissed the top of your head as you drifted off to sleep.

#x men #wolverine #logan howlett #wolverine x reader #wolverine fanfic #wolverine smut #logan howlet x reader #logan howlett fanfic #logan howlett smut #my fics

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cushfuddled · 3 days ago

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I don't know if I want to make a video about this because it's SO subjective obv but also like. I've NEVER felt compelled to write a "homophobic au" where I take a tolerant fantasy world and make it bigoted. As a kid I used to complain ALL THE GODDAMN TIME about how fantasy writers could imagine a world with talking dragons and magic powers but always drew the line at equal rights for gay people. And here I am PUTTING THE HOMOPHOBIA BACK into a fantasy world WITHOUT homophobia. And I was like.

do I feel so compelled to do this???

I knew I didn't NEED an excuse to insert homophobia into Arcane. Write whatever you want etc etc. But I was so curious, since my preference up 'til now has always been for casually queer fantasy worlds. And uh yeah honestly I think this pivot stems from like, a disconnect between my understanding of systemic bigotry as a queer disabled autistic woman and the way Arcane appears to pick and choose its world's politics from a salad bar.

In the real world, social issues are all tangled up in each other. Racism and classism and queerphobia and xenophobia and ableism and misogyny and misandry and ageism...all these 'isms bud off each other in a kind of swirling feedback loop, necessitating an intersectional approach to activism.

At the end of Arcane, no one broke the cycle of violence. The council chamber table is shaped like a gear, symbolizing its members' status as a "gear train" for all change within Piltover and Zaun. Jinx's bomb destroys that gear with the rest of the council room, only for an off-screen contractor to glue the pieces together between scenes. Piltover adds more "progressive" representatives to its gear train, but the underlying oligarchical mechanism remains. If the cycle of violence ever breaks, it will be because these new "teeth" convince the council to trade their power for democracy. If the elite don't give a real voice to the marginalized (I'm not sure one or two non-elected representatives makes the cut), the marginalized will take to more radical measures to be heard, and the conflict will start anew.

Arcane's hostile oligarchical world sculpted Viktor into the perfect time bomb. Its proud disgust for immigrants; addicts; the poor; the disabled, taught Viktor great shame and hate for who he was and where he came from. These lessons are at least cousins to Social Darwinism, fascism, and the politics of eugenics. Viktor aimed to "evolve" himself and his people into a "perfect" final form. He equated "progress" with the eradication of disability and sickness...then emotion.

Here Viktor branches off from the emotionalism central to fascist ideology, declaring passion ("Our emotions...rage, compassion, hate...") the "cause of [humanity's] greatest evil." Viktor describes emotions as Freudian "baser instincts," dirty and corrosive in their "self-corrupting" force.

To deserve love and admiration, Viktor believes he must become perfect. And for all he waxes poetic re: science and reason and the people of Zaun, Viktor still bases his definition of "perfection" on the ideals of his oppressors. It says a lot to me, that Viktor's idea of "progress" looks like the total eradication of sickness and disability; the rise of an obedient, docile, dogmatic collective; the dominance of Viktor's dome amidst the modest shelters of his followers; Viktor's sleek, agile, white and gold robots. Viktor's goals share a springboard with those of the Piltover elite. Both systems place undue value on power and purity. Both depend on a complaisant, malleable public, and both punish individualism. Piltover pretends to champion movers and shakers and out-of-the-box thinkers, immortalizing key figures like "Stanwick Padidly" and Jayce, but Jayce was only allowed back into the world of the wealthy once he proved

a. he had something to give

b. he was deemed suitably manipulable.

The moment Jayce tried to clamp down on Piltover's rampant corruption (aka wield his newfound powers in service of the less fortunate), Mel was there to reinforce the status quo. It was made very clear that Jayce's options were either to fall in line or lose his job—along with the chance to make any kind of positive change. Behind the curtain Jayce and Viktor were only puppets in service of the wealthy and powerful. Hextech didn't better the lives of marginalized people. It upgraded weapons for the police and generated new trade opportunities for employers (the economy would've undergone a hell of a shakeup with the sudden flush of consumer goods and access to overseas labor. From the state of Zaun and Piltover post-time skip, I assume the new trade routes shuffled money around but didn't make necessities like medicine or shelter any more attainable for your average citizen).

"You used me, and Viktor, for Hextech. You called us 'investments.'" "Two brilliant young inventors who shared a penchant for impossible surprises. Carrying magic from myth to machine. Rallying the hope and hearts of a nation. You were a wise investment."

Anyway. Why is Viktor so threatened by his ability to feel "affection?" Every other goal aligns with a kind of supercharged version of Piltover's oppressive value system, but this one...not so much.

I guess you could say "civil society" frowns on explosive emotions like rage and hate because they threaten the docility of a healthy status quo. Compassion poses a similar threat. It makes sense for Viktor to fixate so hard on emotions when they're the only weapon powerful enough to snap him out of his Hexcore power trip. But I'm more drawn to the reading where Viktor recognizes queerness within himself (cough his love for Jayce cough) as another barrier on the road to perfection (as measured by the standards of an oligarchical regime).

It seems to me that Viktor's goals are all symptoms of a society steeped in ableism, classism, xenophobia, and queerphobia—but only three of those conditions manifest in Arcane's worldbuilding.

I dunno, man. What resonates with my queer experience will totally contradict someone else's. But I guess I can't envision an oligarchical system like Piltover's—a system founded on classism, ableism, and a weaponized fear of the dirty "other"—would somehow evade racism and queerphobia. Like..."We're fine with black people and gay people. But god help you if you're poor or sick or disabled or from Zaun!" Bigotry is irrational and contradictory, so there are surely examples of this pick-and-choose phenomenon outside of Arcane. And good lord, I don't think anyone should feel "obligated" to fill their fantasy worlds with homophobia! But Arcane definitely sparked enough cognitive dissonance in me to make me crank out some "what if this world was also homophobic" fanfic.

(There's also League of Legends' legacy as an alt-right cesspool. Before I even knew what an MMO was, I'd been warned about a game called LoL, the supposed "worst of the worst" when it came to voice chat culture. Not sure how I feel about that context yet.)

#arcane #jayvik #tagging because...........to me...........Viktor loves Jayce so much and he HATES IT #because if he didn't love Jayce he could let himself die/ascend to godhood/become dust in the belly of an Eldritch blue Rubik's cube #his curse is that Jayce will never let him go <3333 #OW #Jayce: 'LET YOURSELF BE GAYYYYYYYY'#Viktor: 'WHAT'S THAT I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE GLORIOUS EVOLUTION'

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fizzie-frog · 2 days ago

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Blitzø: core self, trauma and healing (part two)

This is a continuation of my previous post. Thanks to Tumblr limitations, I had to split it into different parts (trust me, I wish I could've made it just one big post).

PART ONE

This might be long...

He tried to waddle through the trauma of existing as someone as self-loathing as himself.

He denied;

“I didn’t do anything, it was an accident!”

He isolated;

He minimized, often with humour;

“Uh-oh, looks like it sucked all the fun outta you!”

He avoided being vulnerable;

“I DID CARE!”

And felt awkward/uncomfortable when he did end up spilling out his emotions;

“Weeeeeeeell, fuck you!”

Suppressed his emotions;

… Cause they’re blinding and suffocating, and it’s easier to avoid them.

He hated himself and didn’t believe there is anything good about him, despite having changed lives for the better;

And he dipped if he got too close (everything literally burnt down when he tried getting closer, didn’t it);

He often didn’t believe others would hold any endearment for him, even taking it as a joke;

“I destroy everything, everyo— I make everyone’s lives worse!”

And that’s it, really. He believes he’s a pest, a virus, something that can only do harm. While his core self still showed itself from time to time, he was blinded with the trauma of all his wrongdoings. All the people he’s hurt and that, in a self-fulfilling prophecy, made him hurt even more.

Everything he couldn’t look straight in the eye. The death of his mother, caused by him. The hurt of his friend, caused by him. The hurt he’s caused around himself. He couldn’t bear see it, knowing it would break him down. That’s why he avoided it. Thinking about what happened, what he did is suffocating. But that also blinded him from seeing his good deeds too. As usual, we’re more likely to see the negative over the positive.

Blitz picked himself up by the bootstraps as they say, but it didn’t help him, not within himself. So what did help?

I think it started in Oops…

He didn’t wanna be vulnerable, but after so much hurt and things left unsaid, it spilled. It all spilled out and made him into a crying mess right in front of Fizz, cause as much as he tried to act unbothered, he did care (as he said in the episode). He was vulnerable, he explained to Fizz exactly what happened instead of holding it in anymore, he apologized to Fizz. They both learnt what happened.

And the kicker? It paid off! Blitz was finally vulnerable to someone, his former best friend, and Fizz forgave him. He got his dear friend back for this. Not only did he win someone he loves back, but also this came as a punch to those unhealthy beliefs, cause he was vulnerable and it didn’t turn out bad.

We have Ghostfuckers.

After being plagued by his memories, Millie came to his aid. She not only reminded him of a time he actually changed her life for the better, but also confirmed that he indeed cares for Blitz.

Then the moment of truth…

Can’t get anymore raw than the moment when his death was imminent. It’s often in times like this that we people’s raw emotions.

In a moment when even Loona was tearing up at the thought of losing Blitz. When all his friends were already mourning him, crying for him as he was about to lose his life.

And in that moment, when he was sure he was gonna die, he could finally say it…

“I love you, guys”

There was nothing to be lost. He was gonna die and the last thing he knew was that his friends were crying for him, but were safe. He could die happy.

Of course though, he didn’t, as we know. Once he was outside the court room, he was pulled in a sobbing hug by his friends and daughter that were relieved he was okay. Even further proof of being loved. Despite the horrible circumstances, it must be so healing to his heart to have that.

True, unfiltered confirmation of being loved. He is loved. The possibility of someone you love dying shakes you. Loona realized it wasn’t worth pretending anymore - life is so short, especially for low class hellborns.

And probably so did Blitz. He was finally in a happy place. His daughter loved him, his friends loved him. Stolas loved him.

He is loved.

So in the Sinsmas episode, we started seeing so much more of who he once was.

He was goofy,

Attentive,

Listening,

Supportive,

Cheerful,

Encouraging,

Patient,

He looked at potential future,

He was selfless,

Protective,

Kind,

Even romantic.

And he was happy…

That’s not to say he’s completely healed. I think you can never truly heal from something like this, especially the magnitude of what Blitz went through in his life, and his issues can resurface.

But at this point in time, he’s finally in a happy place. He was affirmed, comforted and reassured. He’s content, and that’s the most healed he can be.

His core self is finally seeing the light of day. He is more himself than he’s ever been since that day.

So that was it. I’m sorry if I was a bit messy some places; as mentioned, life is kind of a struggle. Sometimes I feel like my brain is deteriorating or something, lmao, but I wanted to put this together cause I feel like Blitz has such a good, painfully relatable (to me anyway) arc and he’s such a complex character.

My love for Fizz remains the biggest, but I couldn’t deny the love I have for Blitz. He’s just such a good character with such good development. Selfish yet selfless, careful yet careless… So many dimensions.

If you made it this far, thank you! <3

#long post #Helluva Boss #Blitzo #Helluva Boss long post #Millie #Moxxie #Sinsmas #Stolas #Verosika Mayday #Fizzarolli #Fizz #Cash Buckzo #Loona

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loving-family-poll · 2 days ago

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2nd Ultimate Incest Tournament - Round 1

Propaganda under the cut:

Anna/Elsa:

THE juggernaut Frozen ship, and I will never forget our glory days!! Anna's act of true love canonically saving Elsa, and then them having a bunch of children from Elsa's sneezes in the Frozen short… Iconic. They will ALWAYS be the most important thing in each other's lives (remember the time Kristoff was trying to propose to Anna, and she was like "Hmm did you see how Elsa was acting weird? I need to go investigate")

Staple for the incest and yuri fandom of the 2010s. Ridiculously romantic storyline of having the kind of true love that's stuff of legends, capable of trumping fear and breaking curses. They are willing to sacrifice anything for each other and we even have a dumbfounded person looking at how beautiful the other is atop of the stairs. Olaf is their baby I guess.

In their attempt to pander to homophobic fans and make a movie about sisterly love instead of lesbians, Disney accidentally made the most beautiful incestuous love story of all time. I just KNOW they were fantasizing about each other while Elsa was locked in her room for all those years. Yes, it's supposed to be a family-friendly princess movie. True sickos know that that's the point.

Elsa and Anna. Two sisters who are separated for thirteen years and yet those thirteen years only entangle them deeper – Anna haunting Elsa because Elsa will not let herself forget the night of the accident, holding Anna close as a child and sobbing… Elsa’s whole life after that moment defined by that moment, defined by protecting Anna and keeping her distance from Anna while yearning to be near to her as the years go by… Elsa sacrificing her everything in the desperate hope that Anna will be safe… If “love is putting someone else’s needs before yours,” then Elsa does that over and over for thirteen years even as she suffers from wanting all the time to be with her sister… – Elsa haunting Anna because Anna is separated from her sister but does not know why, separated from her sister but longing for her sister – and to both of them, the thought of the other becomes something to worship – until Anna gives her life to throw herself before Elsa and stop the falling sword – until Elsa can finally, finally touch Anna again but now Anna is frozen to solid ice, so the only thing Elsa can touch is the reminder that she killed the person she loves most in this world. And then Anna thaws and they cling to each other, united by love – by a desperate, all-consuming, true love that thaws Arendelle around them – and they still carry the thousand wounds from their childhood but they have each other, they love each other, they are in each other’s arms.

I cannot stress enough how intense the film’s focus on touch makes things for incest shippers. Not only are the sister’s separated, but Elsa cannot touch Anna skin to skin, must always wear the gloves, must always keep a barrier between herself and the one she most longs to hold, to touch. Imagine the exhilaration of that first embrace on the fjord. Being able to touch without fear for the first time in years. Imagine the relief.

I also want to cite this, from an anonymous submission to a headcanon blog:

"However, since protecting Anna also required her to stay away from Anna at all times, Anna became sacred, in a sense: something fragile and special to be watched over but never touched or spoken to. She would come to love Anna in much the same way people come to love religious icons: Anna had always been there and had never been there. She loved Elsa and did not know Elsa. She was warm and kind and dedicated and was under no circumstances to be tainted with Elsa’s presence unless she kept the tightest possible control over herself."

That fear of destroying Anna, of corrupting Anna by touching her, of letting loose the repressed part of herself - all of it comes together so exquisitely for an incest ship.

And after they rediscover each other, in Frozen 2? Their bond remains just as intense. The last word on Elsa’s lips before freezing is Anna’s name. Anna, when she realizes Elsa’s “death,” sings a heartbreaking song that includes the lyrics:

“I can't find my direction, I'm all alone The only star that guided me was you How to rise from the floor When it's not you I'm rising for?”

Their pain is born of their love, and their love for each other drives them both forward.

Alex/Justin:

I refuse to believe I was the only child all over this. The WOWP movie had so many romantic undertones I almost felt like I had watch away from my family lol

They are bickering siblings who can't live without each other and regularly perform grand gestures for each other, even if it's just an underhanded eay to get the other's attention or be all up in their business. Alex has every reason to be absolute confident of her brother's love and fussiness towards her because she could literally do anything to him (and she does) and he would still be sure to stick around for more 💀 She might actually die if a day goes by without picking on him too

The Wizards movie…holy shit. Justin is forgetting Alex but is still devoted to her to a fault. "I'll never leave you." Offering his flannel shirt around a fire bc Alex is cold? Romantic as fuck

#tournament polls #tumblr polls #incest poll #anna/elsa #elsanna #justin/alex #jalex #round 1

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ilikekidsshows · 1 day ago

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These are really good additions. For all Marinette complains about how her Ladybug/Guardian responsibilities cut into her time as Marinette, she sure isn't making any moves towards making it so that a Ladybug wouldn't be needed. All her efforts go into stopping the Akuma of the day or some other pointless project that won't actually bring her any closer to catching Hawk Moth. She'll jump at the chance to let Tikki replace her as Ladybug, but she won't make having a Ladybug unnecessary or find a permanent replacement herself. Basically, Marinette wants to stop being a Ladybug, but only when doing so would require her to do nothing.

This makes it seem like the only reason Marinette hasn't already quit is that her motivation to quit is even weaker than her motivation to be a hero. Although, Marinette has had this tendency where she complains about things she could change but then makes no effort to change for a long time in the show. She didn't like Fu sidelining Cat Noir but only made the weakest attempts possible to persuade Fu to talk to him after Cat Noir brought the situation up. Even after Fu stops telling her to keep Cat Noir in the dark about everything, when she's crying about how hard it is to be alone for the couple of weeks after Fu lost his memories, she still won't just talk to Cat Noir. Her telling Alya was an accident, done in the midst of another emotional breakdown. Marinette always had the option to reach out to others and, even when the outside pressure to not do so was removed, she still wouldn't do it by choice.

Marinette complains about things she has the power to change, but then does nothing to change them. This has been going on since even before the retool, and the post-retool Marinette views herself as being completely incapable of changing her circumstances even when she's the one with all the authority and power. Even when she knows how she could change things, she won't do it, because Astruc confirmed in the finale commentary that Marinette understood from Félix's message at least the part about Gabriel being Hawk Moth, and then she acted like she didn't know so that the finale could have a standalone "realization" moment (because they're still writing Miraculous as an episodic show).

However, that just means that, even after she found out the truth, she had no intention of acting on the knowledge that Gabriel was Hawk Moth until he jumped her when she was breaking in to find out information about Adrien. Marinette was going to let Gabriel keep being Hawk Moth at least for the time being, because stopping him would have been too much effort, I guess. Even if you go with the interpretation that Marinette didn't fully understand Félix's message, Astruc confirmed that she at least suspected Gabriel before she went into the mansion, and yet she didn't do anything with her suspicions because that would have required her to put effort and thinking into her heroics instead of just reacting to what was going on directly in front of her.

Basically, Marinette will rarely do anything more than solve an immediate situation. She would rather keep having easy-to-win Akuma fights that cut into her private life that she'll then constantly complain about than make a proper plan to track down and stop the source of the Akumas. Because of this laziness, she was completely unprepared to do anything to actually stop him when Hawk Moth decided they'd have their final confrontation now. All the power, allies and knowledge at her disposal went to waste and she fumbled her way into the world getting destroyed.

Like, when the protagonist has this much knowledge, authority and power and goes this far in not taking advantage of it, all the while complaining about rough she has it, you really gotta start wondering at what point her problems start being self-caused. Sure, Gabriel is responsible for his own actions, but 'Origins' had this quote be an inspiration to Marinette: "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil, is that good people do nothing!" and in the finale, she proves it correct in the worst possible way. Marinette, indeed, did nothing, and Gabriel triumphed. The writers can claim that "Gabriel laid down his arms so Marinette won" all they like, but that symbolic victory is nothing against Gabriel's literal victory of gaining ultimate reality-bending power and getting to reshape the world however he wishes. Once again, the Miraculous writers had something happen that's the exact opposite of what they meant to represent.

I've seen people said Adrien doesn't have motivation to be a hero but Marinette does, which is weird because I feel like it's Marinette who doesn't have a motivation to be hero beyond "people listen to Ladybug". Her lack of motivation is what confused me because as a protagonist, she's inevitably become a role model for the young audience and I find nothing about her is likeable, even more so after she become a guardian. It's as if being a guardian inflate her ego and she forgot that everyone else is a human with feelings, not just a pawn or a doll for her to play and ordered around.

Recently I found out a website that contain the concept plot and it confused me more because I feel like concept Marinette is a more grounded character than she is in the show.

Marinette's goal isn't just to be Adrien/Felix's girlfriend but she also need to collect the kwamis that she accidentally releases and she become a guardian not because of luck or favoritism like how it is in the show, it's because her grandfather is the guardian. Adrien/Felix doesn't even become Chat Noir because he's chosen by the guardian, it's Plagg who chose him. It's actually much better than the whole "I choose you but also I'm not going to do anything with you" that Fu pulls in the show.

i don't understand why the higher up/the sponsor reject this plot because I think this much better than whatever we have now. If they have a problem with Chat Noir being an anti-hero, then why do they accept Marinette being written like one while also hailing her as a hero?

---

“Adrien isn't motivated to be a hero” he actually likes being a hero, unlike our role model protagonist, who’d rather do anything than be Ladybug even when she's being lauded for her heroic deeds. Is this based on Adrien trying to quit when Fu or Marinette is making his job needlessly more difficult to do? Because, like, that's the only thing that he seems to dislike about being a hero, which, like, makes Marinette an even worse hero. She’s so bad at her job, she makes otherwise eager heroes lose their motivation.

I’m gonna be very honest here; Marinette becoming Ladybug because she accidentally released a bunch of magical creatures and Adrien/Félix being more of an anti-hero rival than a full-on ally would have been copied straight from Cardcaptor Sakura’s starting setup. Like, I’m not surprised that even the rejected ideas for Miraculous are copied from other properties, but it just proves that regardless of any other variables, Astruc’s creation was always going to be highly derivative. Regardless, I do feel that Fu being her grandfather instead of a stranger would have gone a long way in justifying Marinette’s special treatment both in-universe and to the audience, but that’s probably why it was rejected.

Like, we can mock the fact that Marinette isn’t actually within spitting distance of being a “normal girl with a normal life” all we like, but that doesn’t change the fact that, from a purely on-paper angle, she is pretty average. She’s a middle-schooler with pretty average hobbies who deals with normal teen problems like bullies and a crush on a boy she doesn’t know how to deal with. There’s a reason it’s the opening line for the show’s opening. It's marketable. A special chosen one from the start wouldn’t have been as marketable in the same way. Especially when we take into account how hypersensitive Astruc is to Marinette being less liked than he’d want. He’d do whatever he can think of to make sure Marinette isn’t immediately judged a “Mary Sue”.

The thing with executives is that they don't watch the shows they fund. They read the pitch, synopses, and maybe the scripts if they can find the time. And even then, they might not want to put in the money to get a script revised even if they paid enough attention to tell it was dogshit. They wouldn't be interested as long as the different Miraculous bedsheets and shampoos keep selling and as long as the show isn’t too gay to sell to other countries. Like, the show bible that Gloob leaked? The one full of inaccuracies because it was outdated? That was what the executives were most likely given when the retool went into development. In addition, corporate oversight on the show has actually decreased the longer it’s gone on, because the show’s proven itself to be a success. I’m pretty sure the higher-ups were not asked: “hey, is it okay if we make Marinette an entitled jerk who gets validated at every turn while she starts treating people worse and worse?” I’m pretty sure no one okayed Marinette’s “villain arc”, it was just allowed to pass because it didn’t make the show less marketable.

That’s the thing with any property that becomes “too big to fail”. Less oversight means less quality control. It’s like one anonymous Gamefreak employee said about making Pokémon games: “It’ll sell anyway, so it doesn’t matter if it’s bad.”

#ml critical #dats chats

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celestial-sapphicss · 2 years ago

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it's good that i already don't like jim as a guardian so i am not affected by wheather jim being homophobic in the previews is accurate or out of context, i do worry for little li ming though 😭

"but vi he's tryin-" no i have ZERO empathy and understanding for any bad guardian/parent. i don't care if you have trauma, i don't care if you're poor, i don't care about how difficult your like is, i don't care how much you love the kid but struggle to show it.

if you have to take care of a kid, you do so with love and affection and care regardless or your circumstances, which jim is not the best at, which automatically makes me dislike him as a character, no greys, only black & white.

yes you make mistakes as a parent, but you can always make it up to them, and it costs literally nothing to be kind. stop projecting your problems on your children

#vi.txt #sometimes shows hit too close to home and it hurts sksksks #thank you p'aof for depicting how frustrating it is to live in households with overbearing caretakers #yes its very real yes i still hate it #i agree with every argument of jim trying his best given his life age circumstances but those aren't reasons to condone his behaviour #just because its understandable doesn't mean its okay #because all that does is set a very dangerous precedent #there are parents who have gone through hell and a lot worse and still end up being a hundred times better and kinder #jim as a gay man should be protective of li ming because of how cruel the world is #instead of showing that same cruelty in his face in the name protection #you know all these things sound good that jim's intensions are good even if the way he conveys them isn't #but how are we forgetting that there's the mental health of a very real child at stake here who is only going to see the actions #moments like these are the ones that break you destroy you #stop making excuses for bad parenting it only makes it worse for children in abusive households to not feel guilty

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secundus-cinaedus · 9 months ago

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while i 1000 percent believe it has been twisted to suit a leftist agenda, the people who believe climate change is completely fake are legitimately fucking braindead

#emit toxic chemicals into the air for a century -> bad shit happens to the air #no one is saying ''the awful pollutant smog in LA and chinese cities is all fake!!'' they'll use it as a reason to not live in a city #but when you suggest that perhaps the entire world is like a city and the whole atmosphere is collecting pollutants #that are harmful to us and affecting the way heat remains in the atmosphere and shit #and suddenly you're globalist scum #like come on it's literally such simple point a to point b #not to mention record breaking weather and temps in the past 5-10 years #''no we should keep putting toxic gasses into the air that will then come down in the water and keep running paki sweatshops that only exist #to make globo homo billionaires more money and produce ungodly amounts of waste every year and ultimately destroy our planet. stfu faggot''#kys retard moment #щ #environmental

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khioneee · 2 months ago

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simon didn’t say ‘i love you’

not in the way most people did. but in his own quiet, raw way, he gave you pieces of his heart through the things he did say—words heavy with meaning, words that stuck with you long after they left his lips.

‘i really miss you. don’t know how much more i can take.’ his voice crackled through the comm line, strained and distant. he was halfway across the world, out on another mission, but in that moment, you could hear the weariness seeping into every word. he wasn’t just talking about the mission; he was talking about being without you—like the distance between you was slowly killing him. ‘don’t know how much more of this i’ve got in me.’

‘stay with me. i don’t want you to leave.’ the words came low and rough, slipping out as you tried to leave for work. after being gone for so long, simon wasn’t ready to let you go. not just yet. his hand wrapped around your wrist, gently pulling you back into bed. ‘just a little longer, yeah?’ he murmured, eyes heavy with unspoken need, as if saying goodbye now would tear him apart.

‘i think i like you best when you’re just with me and no one else.’ he muttered it under his breath after a night spent with soap and the lads. they’d stolen your attention all evening, and simon had stayed quiet, watching from the sidelines. but when he finally pulled you aside, his words came low and possessive. there was no jealousy, only the quiet truth that he preferred you like this—just the two of you, away from the rest of the world.

‘i would gladly break my heart for you.’ the fight still hung heavy in the air, your threat to leave cutting deeper than you realized. but simon didn’t raise his voice. his response was quiet, steady, and devastatingly sincere. ‘if it means you’ll be happier… i’d do it. i’d break my heart for you.’ in that moment, you knew his love wasn’t just in the easy moments—it was in the sacrifices he was willing to make, even if it destroyed him.

‘you’re the only good thing in my life,’ he said softly, almost like a confession, as if admitting it out loud made it more real. his voice carried a weariness that hinted at everything he’d been through, all the darkness that clung to him. but you—you were the one light that cut through it all. and in those words, he gave you the truth of his love—whether he could say the words or not.

and that’s how simon told you ‘i love you.’ not with grand declarations or flowery speeches, but with quiet, broken truths. each one more powerful than three simple words could ever be.

an. based on lyrics by cigarettes after sex haha.

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fangdokja · 9 hours ago

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He made the word “forever” sound like a death sentence.

❤︎ Synopsis. A twisted romance where a ruthless man relentlessly claims your heart and soul, leaving no room for escape—only surrender. Each touch, each word, tightens the grip of his love, until you realize you’re already his.

♡ Book. Forbidden Fruits: Intimate Obsessions, Unhinged Desires.

♡ Pairing. Yandere! Gojo Satoru x Reader, Yandere! Geto Suguru x Reader, Yandere! Ryōmen Sukuna x Reader, Yandere! Naoya Zen’in x Reader

♡ Headcanons. The Ruin of You - Part 1

♡ Word Count. 3,963

♡ Gojo Satoru.

The world fell silent in his presence, and in that stillness, you realized something primal was at play—something ancient and cruel. His hands moved with a surgeon’s precision, fingers tracing over your skin like a scholar memorizing forbidden scripture. Gojo Satoru was a man whose power had long eclipsed his humanity, and he reveled in it. His voice was honeyed venom, soothing and lethal, each syllable embedding itself into the marrow of your bones. “You always act like you hate me,” he murmured, tilting his head, white hair glowing like a halo in the dim, suffocating light. “But I see it. The way you shudder when I touch you. That’s not fear, is it?”

The words hung in the air, cloying, as if the room itself had conspired to trap you. His laughter was soft, almost affectionate, and it grated against the walls of your mind, peeling back layers of resistance you didn’t know you had. When he pinned you, his body was unrelenting—muscles coiled like a predator’s, his weight suffocating yet intoxicating. “You think you can escape me?” he whispered, his lips brushing the shell of your ear, breath warm and damp like the first exhale of a man in watery grave. “You don’t run from God, darling. You kneel.”

———

The truth of him was unbearable. Gojo Satoru was too bright, too vast, a sun that scorched rather than warmed. The endless blue of his gaze was not the serene sky—it was a predator’s snare, a calculated trap that lulled you into believing you were safe. You were not. You had never been safe from him.

His obsession was cruel in its simplicity. He loved the ideation of you more than he could ever love you. He loved how you clawed and scratched, how you denied him even as your breath hitched under his touch. His power made him a god, but it was your resistance that made him feel human, and he loathed how much he needed that. “You’re so fragile,” he mused one night, his voice a silken thread winding around your throat, tightening with every syllable. “It wouldn’t take much to destroy you. A flick of my wrist, a snap of my fingers. But I’d miss this.”

And by this, he meant the trembling, the tears, the bruises that bloomed under his touch like forbidden flowers. He relished the dissonance—the way your body betrayed you, hips arching against him even as your lips spat venom. “You’re lying to yourself,” he whispered, his mouth hovering just above yours, taunting, maddening. “But that’s okay. I’ll teach you how to be honest. I’ll strip away every lie until there’s nothing left but the truth of us.”

His touch was a contradiction, equal parts reverence and desecration. He handled you as though you were a sacred relic, his lips brushing over your skin like a priest in prayer, but his grip was iron, unyielding, bruising. He dragged you to the precipice of your own undoing, holding you there with a sadist’s patience, forcing you to confront the abyss he’d carved into your soul. And when you finally shattered, when the sobs and screams bled into submission, his smile was blinding, cruel. “There it is,” he spoke softly, almost delicately. “I knew you’d come around.”

Gojo Satoru’s love was suffocating, his need a consuming fire. He didn’t just want you—he wanted every thought, every breath, every fleeting moment of your existence. He wanted to hollow you out and fill the empty spaces with him. You were his muse, his masterpiece, and he would break you into a thousand pieces if it meant he could rearrange you to better suit his vision.

He never let you forget the power he held. When his infinite domain bled into your reality, the air turned sharp, biting, like the edge of a blade pressed to your throat. “You can scream if you want,” he said once, his tone almost thoughtful, almost kind. “No one’s coming for you. No one else deserves to touch what’s mine.”

But the most terrifying part wasn’t the violence or the cruelty—it was the love. The way he whispered your name like a benediction, the way his hands trembled when they cupped your face as though he feared you’d disappear. “You don’t understand,” he murmured, his voice breaking in a way that sent ice racing down your spine. “I’d burn the world for you. I’d kill everyone for you. Don’t make me prove it.”

And you believed him. Of course, you did. Because he was Gojo Satoru, and the universe bent to his will. You could run, you could fight, you could scream—but in the end, it wouldn’t matter. He would find you. He would always find you.

────────────

♡ Geto Suguru.

Geto Suguru had always been a collector. Curses, dreams, people—it didn’t matter so long as they were his. You weren’t special, not at first, but then you learned how to look at him. That sharp defiance in your eyes, the way your trembling body betrayed you even as your lips spat curses at him—it was delicious. He told himself he’d only keep you for a little while, long enough to break you, to see what you’d look like when there was nothing left but him. But now, with his fingers wrapped around your throat, the crescent moons of your nails digging into his forearm, he realized you’d undone him. “Look at me,” he growled, voice fraying at the edges. “Don’t you dare close your eyes.”

There was nothing gentle about the way he took you—no slow unraveling, no pretense of kindness. He wanted you to hurt. Every gasp, every choked sob was a hymn to his twisted devotion. “You should thank me,” he sneered, dark eyes gleaming with something far beyond lust. “No one else would love you like this. No one else could even stomach you.” His words cut deep, but it was the way he kissed you after—bruising, biting, desperate—that made you feel like drowning.

———

The truth of Geto Suguru was a slow poison, a venom that coursed through your veins long after you realized it was too late to escape him. He was deliberate in his cruelty, patient in a way that made you feel like a cornered animal, even when his hands were nowhere near you. He had a way of filling the air around you, suffocating and inescapable, his presence heavy with the kind of darkness that couldn’t be outrun.

To Suguru, you were another treasure in his collection—but one unlike anything he had claimed before. There was a fire in you, a defiance that gnawed at his carefully constructed veneer of control. He told himself he wanted to snuff it out, to see the moment your spirit crumbled beneath the weight of his will. But as days turned into weeks, as your screams turned into whimpers and then silence, he realized it wasn’t the breaking he craved. It was the knowing that he had forged something new from your ruin—a version of you that existed only for him.

“You think you’re better than me,” he said one night, his voice low and dangerous, each word a scalpel carving into your resolve. His hand curled around your jaw, forcing your gaze to meet his. “But look at you now. You’re still here, still mine. Tell me, how does it feel to be nothing without me?”

There was a reverence in the way he touched you, but it was a reverence that bordered on devastation. His fingers moved over your skin like a sculptor molding clay, testing, reshaping, breaking you down into something he could keep forever. His lips hovered over yours, not in a kiss but in something far darker, his breath hot and uneven as he whispered, “You’ll thank me one day. When there’s no one else left but me, you’ll see that I’ve done you a favor.”

He wasn’t rough for the sake of it; no, his cruelty was calculated, a series of deliberate acts designed to remind you of your place. When he pressed his weight against you, when his hands left bruises in the shape of his grip, it wasn’t out of passion—it was a claim, a reminder that you belonged to him. And yet, there was an undeniable hunger in his touch, a desperation that betrayed him.

“You don’t even realize, do you?” he murmured against your ear, his tone soft, almost tender, but laced with an edge that made your stomach churn. “How much power you have over me. It’s infuriating.” His fingers tightened around your throat, not enough to hurt but enough to make your breath hitch. “But don’t get any ideas. I’ll destroy you before I let you think you have the upper hand.”

And destroy you he did—piece by piece, slowly, methodically. He unraveled you with the precision of a man who had spent years perfecting his craft. But it wasn’t just your body he wanted; it was your mind, your soul, the very essence of who you were. He wanted to know every thought, every fear, every weakness, so he could twist them into chains that bound you tighter to him.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he snapped one evening, his voice a dangerous growl. “You act like I’m the monster here, but you’re the one who made me like this.” There was a crack in his voice, a hint of something raw and unhinged, and it sent a chill down your spine. “Do you have any idea what you do to me? What it feels like to know that no matter how much I hurt you, it will never be enough to make you stay willingly?”

When he kissed you, it was with a ferocity that bordered on desperation. His teeth grazed your lips, drawing blood, his hands gripping your wrists so tightly you thought they might break. And yet, there was something almost tender in the way he buried his face in your neck afterward, his breath ragged, his voice barely a whisper. “You’re mine,” he said, over and over again, like a mantra, like a curse. “No one else can have you. No one else will even look at you when I’m done.”

Geto Suguru’s love was a prison, his devotion a suffocating weight. He didn’t just want to possess you—he wanted to consume you, to erase every trace of who you were until all that remained was what he had made of you. And as much as you hated him, as much as you fought and screamed and resisted, you couldn’t ignore the way his touch set your nerves alight, the way his words twisted into your mind and stayed there, festering, growing.

Because deep down, in the darkest corners of your soul, you knew he was right. There was no one else who would ever want you after him. And there was no escape from the man who had already claimed every part of you worth having.

────────────

♡ Ryōmen Sukuna.

Ryōmen Sukuna was a god in every sense of the word, his very presence a blasphemy against your fragile humanity. He didn’t need chains to bind you—fear was more effective, and he wielded it with the precision of a blade. When he laughed, it wasn’t mirthful; it was a serrated sound that scraped against your nerves, leaving you raw. “You’re trembling,” he observed, voice like molten metal. “I can’t tell if it’s because you loathe me or because you desire me. Maybe both.”

He moved like a predator, deliberate and unhurried, savoring every second of your futile resistance. His hands were rough, calloused, dragging over your skin with the weight of inevitability. “Struggle all you like,” he said, his lips curling into a feral grin. “It only makes me want to ravage you more.” And ruin you he did. There was no gentleness in him, no pretense of love—only a hunger that bordered on madness. When he whispered your name, it wasn’t an endearment; it was a claim, a reminder that you were his, body and soul, whether you wanted it or not.

———

Ryōmen Sukuna was not a man but a calamity, a walking desecration of everything you had ever believed sacred. His aura was suffocating, oppressive, the kind of presence that pressed down on your lungs and whispered of your mortality with every shallow breath. He was vast and terrifying, his gaze cutting through you as if he could dissect your very soul. To him, you were a toy, an amusement, and a possession all in one. And Sukuna did not share his possessions.

“You keep looking at me like that,” he said one night, his voice a low rumble that vibrated through the air. “Like you think you can escape. Like you think your defiance means something.” His grin widened, sharp and wicked, his teeth bared in a way that was almost animalistic. “It’s cute, really. How fragile you are. How breakable.”

He liked to watch you tremble—not because he enjoyed your fear (though he did) but because it was proof of his power. Every shiver, every flinch, every whispered plea was a testament to the fact that he owned you. He relished it, savored it, dragged it out as long as he could. When his hands ghosted over your skin, they were rough and unyielding, calloused from centuries of violence, and yet they moved with the care of a craftsman sculpting his finest work.

“You don’t even understand, do you?” he murmured, his voice dripping with mockery and something darker, something that made your stomach twist. “What it means to belong to me. You think this is cruelty? Oh, little one, you haven’t even begun to see what I’m capable of.”

His touch was devastating, a deliberate blend of pain and pleasure designed to keep you on the edge of madness. He didn’t care for gentleness—there was no patience in him for such things. When he pinned you down, it was with a force that stole the breath from your lungs, his weight an inescapable reminder of his strength. His hands left bruises like brands, his teeth marked your skin with the ferocity of a beast claiming its mate.

“You’re mine,” he snarled against your ear, his breath hot and ragged. “Every inch of you. Every thought. Every breath. Say it.”

You didn’t want to. You swore you wouldn’t. But the words came anyway, dragged from you by the sheer weight of his will, and when you finally whispered them, his grin turned predatory. “Good girl,” he said, his tone dripping with condescension and satisfaction. “See? You can be taught.”

But it wasn’t enough for him to claim you. Sukuna wanted to destroy you, to unmake and rebuild you until the person you had been was nothing more than a distant memory. He took pleasure in your resistance, in the way you fought even when you knew it was futile. “Keep struggling,” he taunted, his voice a low, dangerous purr. “It makes it more fun for me. And when you finally break, when you finally give in—oh, the look on your face will be exquisite.”

There was no tenderness in Sukuna, no pretense of love. What he felt for you was darker, more primal, a hunger that bordered on obsession. He didn’t want your heart—he wanted your submission, your complete and utter surrender. And he would stop at nothing to get it.

“You hate me,” he said one night, his tone almost contemplative as he studied the tears streaking your face. “But you hate yourself more, don’t you? For the way your body responds. For the way you can’t help but want this, even when you know you shouldn’t.” His grin widened, cruel and knowing. “That’s the difference between you and me, little one. I don’t fight what I am. And soon, you won’t either.”

Sukuna’s love, if it could be called that, was a consuming fire. It burned away everything you were, leaving only ashes in its wake. But in those ashes, he found beauty. He didn’t just want to possess you—he wanted to hollow you out, to carve his name into the core of your being until there was nothing left of you that didn’t belong to him.

And the worst part? Deep down, in the darkest corners of your soul, you knew you would never escape him. You could run, you could fight, you could scream—but in the end, it wouldn’t matter. Ryōmen Sukuna was not a man you could flee from.

He was your fate, your curse, your god.

And you were his. Forever.

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♡ Naoya Zen’in.

Naoya Zen’in was a man born into power and arrogance, and he wielded both with a cruelty that left no room for mercy. To him, you were a possession, a thing to be owned and controlled. But there was something about the fire in your eyes, the way you spat his name like a curse, that made him want to break you all the more. “You think you’re better than me?” he sneered, his hand fisting in your hair, yanking your head back to meet his coldhearted eyes. “That you’re worth more than what I’ve decided you are?”

His voice was razor-sharp, cutting through you like a scalpel. He didn’t care about your tears, your pleas—if anything, they only fed the sadistic spark in his eyes. “You’ll learn,” he said, his breath warm against your skin. “I’ll teach you to respect me. To worship me.” His touch was bruising, his movements deliberate, each one designed to remind you of your helplessness. When he smiled, it was a cruel thing, a promise of pain to come. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’ll make sure you remember this. Every time you close your eyes, you’ll see me.”

———

Naoya Zen’in was a man who thrived on control—on the knowledge that everything in his world bent to his will, even you. Especially you. He was raised to see women as tools, objects to be claimed, and yet when he looked at you, something more feral burned beneath his skin. You weren’t compliant, and that enraged him. You dared to meet his gaze, to resist him, and it made him want to tear you apart just to see if that defiance would last when you were nothing but a trembling, shattered version of yourself.

“You don’t know your place,” he snarled, his tone laced with venom and something darker, something primal. His hand lashed out before you could react, gripping your chin with enough force to make you wince. He tilted your head up, forcing you to meet his eyes—the eyes of a predator who already knew he’d won. “But don’t worry. I’m going to teach you. You’ll thank me when you finally understand what you were made for.”

Naoya’s touch was deceptively smooth at first, fingers skimming over your skin like a whisper of silk. But there was no kindness in him, no softness. His hands lingered just long enough to make your breath hitch before they tightened, before they bruised. Every caress was a threat, every press of his body a reminder of his strength, of the power he held over you.

“Do you think this is a choice?” he hissed, his voice dropping to a menacing whisper that sent a chill running down your spine. “That you can say no to me? To me?” His laugh was sharp and cutting, the sound grating against your nerves like shards of glass. “You don’t get to refuse me. No one does. And certainly not a little thing like you.”

His cruelty wasn’t mindless; it was precise, calculated, designed to break you down piece by piece. He didn’t rush. Naoya was a man who believed in savoring his victories, and you were no different. He toyed with you, dragging out your fear and frustration until it coiled around your chest like a vice. “I can feel your heart racing,” he murmured, leaning in close, his breath ghosting over your lips. “Are you scared? Good. You should be.”

The way he moved was unrelenting, every action a declaration of his dominance. He didn’t just want your body—he wanted your submission, your obedience. He wanted you to kneel, to look up at him with eyes full of fear and respect, to say his name like a prayer. “You think you’re strong,” he mocked, his hands pinning you in place with an ease that made your stomach churn. “But look at you now. Pathetic. Weak. Exactly as you should be.”

When he spoke, his words were a twisted melody, equal parts honey and poison. “Do you know how many women would kill to be where you are right now?” he said, his grin widening into something monstrous. “And yet here you are, pretending like this isn’t the greatest thing that’s ever happened to you. You should be grateful. But no matter. I’ll make you grateful. I’ll make you understand.”

Naoya’s kisses were bruising, punishing, leaving your lips swollen and your skin raw. His teeth scraped over your neck, biting down just hard enough to leave marks that wouldn’t fade for days. “These will remind you who you belong to,” he said, his voice a low growl that vibrated through your chest. “So even if you try to run, even if you think you can escape, you’ll know—deep down—that you’re mine.”

He wasn’t just cruel for the sake of it. Naoya wanted to reshape you, to strip away everything you thought you were and replace it with something new, something that belonged to him completely. “You think you’re strong enough to resist me,” he mused, dragging his thumb over your trembling lips. “But strength doesn’t matter when you’re already mine. I’ll break you. And when I put you back together, you’ll thank me for it.”

Even in his moments of quiet, when his voice softened and his touch lightened, there was no comfort to be found. His words were laced with venom, his gaze a trap. “You’ll come to love this,” he whispered, his tone almost gentle, but the cruelty in his smile betrayed him. “One day, you’ll realize that this is what you were made for. To be mine. To belong to me in every way that matters.”

Naoya Zen’in was not a man who loved; he was a man who consumed. He devoured every part of you—your strength, your pride, your will—until there was nothing left but the version of you he had created. And when he looked at you, broken and trembling beneath him, he didn’t see defeat.

He saw perfection.

────────────

Each man was a storm in his own right, their darkness suffocating and all-consuming. There was no escape, no salvation—only the relentless pull of their obsession, dragging you deeper into the abyss. And as much as you hated them, hated what they turned you into, you couldn’t deny the way your body betrayed you, the way your heart stuttered in fear and something else you dared not name.

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General TAG LIST: @uniquecutie-puffs , @ikevampharem , @tnsophiaonly , @mokingbrd78k , @cooldeermagazine , @mimitk , @xileonaaaa

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pastelclovds · 5 months ago

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thinking about short top x tall bottom relationships

your partner’s friends believe that just because you were two feet shorter than him: that it would obviously mean that you would be the one taking it in the relationship. how could you blame those meatheads when your boyfriend was everything a stereotypical dominant man was “supposed” to be. muscles that could be compared to Greek gods, good looks, possessing a constant stern and confident attitude, and he had a successful career that made him good money.

your lover didn’t try to deny the accusations. probably too embarrassed to admit the truth. you had to hide your smirk when you saw your bf trying desperately to change the subject. looking tense and flustered as his gaze shifted from his hands to you to his friends. it wasn’t until you dropped his friends off and were now alone with him in your car that his mask finally cracked. before he could say a word, you place the palm of your hand on top of his shaking leg. dangerously close to his clothed pelvis. his breathe hitched when he meet your eyes. they were smug and hungry.

at that moment he knew it didn’t matter what excuses he spewed out. you were going to show him who was really in charge. he couldn’t help blood rushing south as his mind started fantasizing about what you were planning for him.

you grin devilishly when you catch sight of his cock straining against his dress pants. oh you were going to have so much fun breaking him.

. . . . . . . . . . . .

“oh! oh yeah— fuck! faster please please!”

you’ve seen many beautiful things in your life. but the sight of your lover presenting his bare ass for you to rail as he sobbed out your name like a prayer definitely topped them all. he let out choked moans when your cock continuously hits his prostate. his grip on the pillows rival that of a vice as his tears wet the covers. he thrusts back against your cock to the best of his ability as the bruising grip you had on his waist prevented him from moving the lower half of his body. forcing him to stay still and take it.

you let out a shaky breath as you gazed down at the so called ‘master in the sheets’. now a pathetic, beautiful mess as his tight hole took you in. just the sight of his tear stained face and velvety ass was enough to almost make you spill inside him. you increase the pace of your hips. your sweat slicked balls slapping against your lover’s ass as the volume of his moans and cries increased. the clap of your bf’s ass meeting your pelvis filled you with pride as you couldn’t resist the temptation of slapping his cheek. his hole tightened significantly around you.

“haha. guess your friends were wrong about you, lovely. was this what you wanted? embarres me so i can show you who you really belonged to? hmm?” you lower your torso as you teased him by slowly grinding against his sweet spot. he raised his head to look up at you.

“i’m yours. always make me feel good. go faster again please. i’m close, ‘m sorry— ah!”

your pace returns to rough and quick as soon as the words left his pretty mouth. “good boy- hah- cum for me,” you breathlessly command him. he followed your orders instantly, biting his pillow cover to muffle his pathetic sob as his cock spilled white on the sheets.

his climax triggered yours, you sigh as you fill him with warmth. you knew that this wasn’t going to be the last round, so you rest on top of your lover’s back until he gave you the ‘okay’ to continue. you could feel his chest rise and fall as he tries to catch his breath. if you weren’t paying attention intensely, you would’ve missed the breathless “i love you” he told you.

you cover his sweat coated back in soft kisses, you couldn’t even reach his neck, “i love you too, gorgeous,” you whisper back. you bite back a groan when he started grinding against your cock, signaling that he was ready for round two.

you loved destroying stereotypes.

ur fav tall af characters <3

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temporarytemporal · 10 months ago

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cling to me

I know I said I was going to distance myself from this piece of media because of all of its terrible connections, but these two characters seem to have taken root in a permanent place in my heart, and I can't let them go.

Anyway, here's some character design notes below the cut for the one person out there who's obsessed with these characters as much as me.

Early DSMP: the era of childhood innocence

Bandanas: They sport each other’s bandana’s (they’re hidden in the design for every era). I love character designs with complementary colors (and I love how red and green are also cranboo’s colors)

Disks: Early on, cat and mellohi represent the peaceful moments ctommy shared with his favorite people, but they went on to be a symbol of victory and independence from the people who have hurt him.

Flowers: Ctubbo collects flowers and tries to memorize the meanings and symbolism tied to each type of flower. He also collects them for his bees.

L’manberg: the era where children became soldiers

Horns: Ctubbo’s horns start to grow in here.

Pogtopia: the era of an exile and a secretary of state / spy

You can tell I joined the fandom at the end of this era because I don’t have many notes here or for the l’manberg era.

Exile: the era of an exile once again and and a president too young

Hair: Ctommy’s hair starts to grow longer as he neglects taking care of himself.

Clothes: Ctommy’s clothes are tattered; one shoe is destroyed and he took to wearing cw-lbur’s (f-ck ccw-lbur btw!!) trench coat.

Bandages: Ctubbo’s wrapped in bandages from his recently earned firework burns. He’s gone blind in his right eye, and he’s missing the ring and pinkie finger on his right hand.

Compasses: They share their matching ‘your tommy’ and ‘your tubbo’ compasses

Hog Hunt: the era where one sought to kill the blood god while the other sought refuge there

Stolen goods: Ctommy’s has his antarctic empire outfit plus all the goods he stole from ctechno like the turtle helmet, golden apples, and the axe of peace.

Bedrock: Ctommy wears his counterpart piece matching techno’s from his ear.

Prosthetic: Ctommy’s right foot had to be amputated after he loses it to frostbite in the trek to cemeraldduo’s cabin. Ctechno gives him a simple prosthetic.

Disc Finale: the era of mended relationships and a final stand

Headband: Ctommy begins to wear a devil headband to fit in more, as he’s one of the few humans on the server. The devil horns were chosen to resemble ceryn’s real ones.

Patchwork: Ctommy learns to sew, and he fixes his tattered clothes from exile.

Post Revival:

Devil horns: Ctommy’s devil horns (plus a tail) become real after revival, and he gets a white streak in his hair.

Prime cross: The bad things that have happened to them both that they survived strengthen ctommy’s faith in prime, whereas they weaken ctubbo’s faith.

Sweater: Ctommy makes himself a sweater from friend’s wool.

Mechanical inventions: Ctubbo pursues his passion for engineering more as he makes mechanical bee drones and studies nuclear physics. He also makes himself prosthetic fingers, and he upgrades ctommy’s prosthetic foot.

Marriage ring: Ctubbo marries cranboo platonically and wears the ring on his horn. He also founds snowchester so he can have a place to protect his loved ones and raise his son. He grows out his hair to avoid eye contact for cranboo and to cover his scars.

Body type: Ctubbo gets chubbier and gains some muscle as he gets a bit happier in life.

Post DSMP:

The prison break and everything after it never happened. These are my OCs, and I make the rules because every actor/writer who played a part in their creation either abandoned them or turned out to be a terrible person. Cbenchtrio live happily ever after and begin their journey of healing while cdream rots in prison forever.

#dsmp #ctommy #ctubbo #tempo art

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lovieku · 2 months ago

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ORDINARY THINGS ⋆ 정국

𐙚 ordinary things, as long as i’m with you.

after a lost match, jeongguk’s only source of comfort is you.

from the grande series ୨ৎ

pairings: soccer captain!jk x fem!reader

genre: fluff, established relationship

warnings: lower case intended, i wanna say that i know very little about soccer, even more about what goes on behind the scenes, but of course i had to put jeongguk in bellingham’s iconic holey socks hehe 😻, it’s a bit angsty at first just bc ggukkie is an angsty boy, but then all of it is just fluff really! hints at mental illness, heavy use of the pet name baby, they’re so funny i love them, theyre also horny! only mentions of sex tho, and sexy kisses and touches keke

word count: 6990

a/n: waaa omg i managed to keep this under 10k words who’s proud of me! this is so slow but im in love w their domestic dynamic 🙁

────୨ৎ────

the piercing whistle cuts through the air.

it marks the official end of the match, sealing the loss of your boyfriend’s team. the sound feels sharp, final, not only to the game.

you knew this was fairly important. it wasn’t too decisive on the team’s position in the ranking, but you knew it mattered to him. like every other game, regardless of stakes.

whether it was a friendly or a tournament, jeongguk had no other mode but all in.

that dedication shows in every tense line of his body now. the weight of defeat begins to sink in, and you can see it on his face, the way it affects him.

you can already sense what’s swirling around in his mind, behind the quiet exterior. you’re sure of it from how he still stands there, avoids his surroundings, keeps his eyes glued to the ground, the green field suddenly more captivating.

you don’t need words to know. he’s retreating inward, locking away his disappointment, and likely taking on more than just the burden of his own loss.

he’s probably thinking of his teammates, feeling like he let them down too. allowing it all to crash on him, the single outcome of this match unraveling everything he worked hard for.

his confidence shatters with the referee’s whistle, and it shuts down the noise of the crowd, makes him unresponsive to the comforting pats on his back from his friends. it’s all a distant hum to him now.

jeongguk is deliberately slow as he almost mechanically leads his exhausted self out the pitch, body moving without his mind’s consent.

he doesn’t care if it’ll take him forever to take these steps. if he’s the last one leaving. he just needs a moment to figure out his next move.

but can he? can he face his team without this ugly feeling gnawing at him? can he keep lying, tell them they did well, that they’ll do better next time, while his own mask suffocates him? is he even deserving of the captain title?

he doubts it, his legs moving as if the world has time to offer him, body struggling under the weight of a lifeless feeling creeping in.

your heart clenches painfully. from the sidelines, watching him like this breaks something in you.

you grip the hem of your tennis skirt, fingers twitching as you fight the crazed urge rising in your throat to just run to him.

it’s hard to find your breaths when witnessing your boyfriend destroying himself as if that’s the only treatment he thinks he’s deserving of. but you also know the last thing you want to do right now is to draw more attention to him when he’s so raw, vulnerable. when every eye in the stadium strips him bare.

and you just want to put his every piece back, cover him in warmth. your mind is made up when you abruptly stand up, hastily making your way toward the locker room before he can get there, offering polite smiles to the players who are already getting inside.

you settle outside the door, waiting.

jeongguk drags behind the others, eyes still casted down. he’s so absorbed in his escape, so lost in the act of avoidance, that you’re certain he won’t notice you, with your beating heart held out to him in your cold hands.

yet, he does find some sort of answer in the ground he keeps staring at, asking for solutions.

amidst the worn, muddied football boots, he spots your shoes. dr. martens platforms, the ones you pair with white socks that ruffle at the top.

the sight is enough to pull him out of his daze, and he looks up.

the door to the locker room closes behind the last player, the heavy thump echoing in the long hallway. it startles you, just as jeongguk’s sudden awareness startles him, and you search for some sort of stability in each other’s eyes.

his own are glossy with unshed tears, and they glisten under the harsh fluorescent light. it doesn’t help the way his vision gets blurrier and pulls you farther from him.

but he needs to see you— the comfort in your face, the one that he feels as though he can’t breathe without.

jeongguk squeezes his eyes shut, the tears slipping free, but the moment he flutters his eyelids open and meets you clearly, he doesn’t care.

his wide, tear-filled gaze takes you in. brows drawn up, your expression seems to mirror his. you’ve always absorbed people’s emotions to an almost extreme degree. when others cry, so do you. and when jeongguk cries, it feels like the whole world is falling apart.

but you can’t afford that happening, and you’ll hold its full weight on your shoulders to prevent such thing.

this time, you need to be stronger for him. swallowing the lump rising in your throat, you blink back your own tears and take a hesitant step toward him.

jeongguk, so much taller than you, seems to shrink before your eyes. right now, he’s the smallest, most fragile boy.

“baby,” your voice is a soft whisper, arms stretching open in a subtle invitation, one that he doesn’t need to be asked twice.

the moment you speak and break the quiet, the dam he’s been holding up crumbles. he crashes into you, hands wrapping tightly around your waist, his nose buried in the crook of your neck.

the impact makes you stumble slightly, but you hold him just as tight in return, focusing on his sharp breaths against your skin, wet with his tears, body trembling in your embrace.

your arms wrapped around his neck, you squeeze him hard, as if he’s a sponge that you’re trying to empty from all the dirty liquid. all the exhaustion, the anxiety, the guilt.

with the way he downright drops his full weight on you, you guide him to sit on the bench just outside the locker room. he slumps beside you, heavy and limp against you, seeking your warmth and comfort the way an addict seeks for the drug that’s able to keep them going.

you sit like that for a while, and you think it’s better this way. he has time to let it out against your chest, and you have the time that you need to compose yourself before you’re met with the full extent of his brokenness.

the second you see his tear stricken face, you think all of the effort was useless. you’re so, so weak.

jeongguk hiccups, lifts his face, his wide eyes flitting between yours like one would follow a tennis match at his peak point, searching for something, the smallest indicator of victory.

the tears make his cheeks red, and it adds to the frantic pleading he trips on, “b—baby, please. i don’t— i’m tired. wanna— home—“

“hey, gguk. ggukie, breathe,” you’re gentle when you cut him off, taking his face between your small palms to try and steady his panic, and mostly yourself. you’re fighting hard to not break too, to try and be the anchor he needs.

you take exaggerated deep breaths, hoping he’ll mirror you, and after a few moments his chest rises and falls in sync with yours, warm breath fanning over your lips.

imperceptibly, you feel his panic begin to ebb. his brows relax and his eyelids blink slower, regaining consciousness of his surroundings.

his hands reach up, covering yours as they rest at his jaw, squeezing them, and he exhales shakily, still not fully over his agitation, “i’m sorry. i wanna go home. i don’t— don’t wanna do interviews, don’t wanna see anyone. don’t wanna talk to coach. i just wanna be with you, please.”

his speech is hushed, pleading, his words slurred as if afraid you’re going to stop him, force him to go through the motions of what’s expected of him before he can beg further.

you brush his cheek with your thumb in a slow motion, moving him closer to you, your voice as careful as possible, “but, jeongguk… we can’t disappear without at least telling the others. coach will want you to answer—“

“please, love. please,” he cuts you, words trembling, “don’t make me go through this. i’m too weak now. i can’t.”

you’ve never seen jeongguk like this before.

it’s been over two years since he asked you to be his girlfriend. that night, he scored a goal for you. you knew it the moment the ball hit the net.

even with his teammates swarming him in celebration, his eyes searched for yours, locking on the moment he found you in the stands.

wrapped in your wool scarf, your face almost fully hidden, the way your eyes turned into crescents and your cheekbones so prominent was unmistakable.

the smile that you shared was sheepish, but brimming with meaning. carrying all those emotions you had both been tiptoeing around for so long.

for a while, your feelings had been caught in a slow dance, never fully picking up, but nonetheless comfortable with the motion.

jeongguk always found a reason to have you near, inviting you to practices and matches, because only your presence could give him the strength needed. and you always found a reason to show up.

even more when you easily fell into the routine that followed every encounter, evenings spent at your apartment, on your couch.

it was a schedule you soon came to love, with him making you laugh, an arm draped over your shoulder, your leg casually resting across his lap. the movies you would put on would quickly become background noise as his playful jokes turned into shared glances, quiet giggles, and stolen kisses.

kisses that felt like the ones teenagers share when they’re crushing on someone for the very first time.

kisses that didn’t evolve into anything more until that night, when he scored for you. it was unashamedly sweet, the feeling he gave you.

back at his flat, his face lit up with a grin so big it was infectious. the rush of adrenaline from winning the game and the joy of finally making you his girlfriend radiated from him.

it’s a stark contrast to his expression, now. it’s drawn with helplessness, clouded with a desperation that makes you ache.

he looks tired of fighting, of holding it all together. and it’s not just that— there’s a deep yearning, a frantic search, a needy plea to be understood, to be seen by you.

there’s nothing that truly comes more innately to you. it’s second nature, caring for him. knowing him. looking after him. tending to his physical and emotional scars. and you don’t want him to scrape his skin further.

you try to reason, “what— what about your things, don’t you at least want to—“

“i’ll ask taehyung to take my bag with him or something,” for the state he’s currently in, he still looks willing to do anything if it means getting out of here. and so, he begs again, “please. can we go home?”

you know you can’t say no to him. that’s not something that comes as good to you. not in your nature.

“this is not the way to your house.”

still in his soccer jersey, the uniform’s shorts touching his knees and holey socks high up his calves, muddy boots hurting his feet, jeongguk sits quietly next to you in the backseat of his car.

his chauffeur drives steadily, away from the hurt, and each mile puts more distance between jeongguk and the weight of the loss, the field, the pressure. he feels himself leave fragments of disappointment behind, back there.

it’s been a long time since it was just the two of you in his car. jeongguk would be the one driving, his left hand steady on the wheel, the right one always reaching for yours, a quiet confirmation of his love.

now, someone else takes care of the driving, especially after games, or in moments like these when jeongguk’s mind and body are too exhausted to handle anything more.

ever since the goal that changed everything between you two, jeongguk’s life took off. a big team recognized his potential and signed him, a moment that marked his breakthrough as pro in the football world.

then, it became a whirlwind. constant games, media attention, opportunities flooding in, and money pouring from every direction.

he bought a house — a mansion, really, — just outside the city, the kind of place he dreamed of as a small kid with big ambitions. everything about it is luxurious, grand, all jeongguk thought he wanted.

but there’s been something left behind, back in the quieter days when he was just a young player fighting for his place on this planet.

you met him before the fame, before his name was on the backs of jerseys and his face on billboards. you fell in love with the boyish version of him, the one who lived in a cramped flat, working tirelessly to make a name for himself.

you’ve been there through every step, enough to recognize the struggle in his eyes.

you so easily catch that flicker of awareness in him. the jolting confirmation that all of this is real, his orbs trembling. and when it hits, he retreats into himself, lets anxiety creep in.

he may not voice it, but you know the root of it. the fear of losing himself, of becoming someone else, of forgetting the version of him that’s grounded in simplicity and love.

jeongguk fears intertwining himself with what he always wanted will inevitably erase what he’s always been, the son of hardworking parents in busan, raised on sacrifice and dreams.

what he always had with you. quiet, uncomplicated. happy with the ordinary things, eating ramen on the floor of his tiny apartment, driving around just to talk about anything and nothing, reading quietly next to each other in the cafè you’ve introduced him to, your presence a comfort to him long before he realized he loved you as more than a friend.

jeongguk wants to hold onto that simplicity, and he wants you to be part of that. he wants you to stay by his side, to be the reminder of who he is beneath all the noise. what he wants to keep being.

because you’re his constant, unwavering, never changing. you’ve never needed him to be more than who he already is. you never look at him with the kind of judgment or disappointment that seems to follow him after every missed opportunity. there’s no pressure, no expectations of success.

in your eyes, he is just jeongguk— the same boy that approached you with a bad pun only to clumsily blame it on his drink. the one you built a familiar rhythm with, ordinariness always just enough for you. for the two of you, together.

you don’t need mansions, fancy restaurants, designer clothes. you don’t need grandeur. you’ll stay the way it’s always been, and the way you both want it to stay.

he quickly scans your face, letting your words register. your brows are furrowed slightly, pouty lips parted as if you’re about to tell the driver that he’s going the wrong way, headed somewhere other than the house he now calls home.

before you can speak, jeongguk interrupts you, his voice soft and suddenly self aware, “oh, i— sorry, i gave directions to your apartment. i just really wanted to be there with you.”

you blink at his fragile honesty. he had begged to be home, and now here you were, on the way to your own.

warmth spreads through you, and you can’t help but break into a big smile, one that eases the tension in his forehead, and mirrors softly in the grin that tugs at his pierced lips.

leaning in, you place a peck on his cheek, “it’s okay, baby. i’ve got so many of your clothes in my closet, there won’t be a problem.”

his low chuckle is comforting, and he scrunches his nose in that familiar way, shuffling closer to nuzzle into your shoulder. for a moment, the world outside fades. you’re hopeful as you think you can feel the weight on his heart lifting.

looking up, a teasing smile spreads across his face, “i wonder why.”

his playful shift surprises you, though you try not to show it. you want him to feel normal, like there’s nothing you should keep being sad over. your brows raise ever so slightly before you roll your eyes in mock exasperation, the fond amusement clear on your features.

it’s enough for jeongguk’s giggles to fill the car, an arm snaking around your waist, “it’s because you always steal my clothes.”

feigning shock, you gasp dramatically, swatting him lightly. he only laughs more, soft sounds bubbling up again, and you can feel love rushing through you, swarming frantically in your chest.

you play along with him, “no, it’s because you always leave your stuff behind after we— we…”

you trip on your words and pause when you realize what nearly slipped out, sheepishly averting your gaze to glance at the chauffeur, who seemingly looks too focused on the road to hear what you’re saying.

jeongguk’s eyes light up, his smile widening as his fingers teasingly pinch your sides, “after we what? say it, baby.”

you flinch at his ticklish touch, breaking into a grin and stubbornly shaking your head no. his laughter mingles with yours, bodies pressing tighter as he leans his weight into you, his nose brushing your jaw.

being this close to him, you inhale his scent. he still smells like adrenaline, mixed with exhaustion, sweat pearling his back. the feeling grounds you.

he hums lowly against your skin, his lips trailing wet pecks along your throat, “i miss doing that.”

your chuckle turns into a frenzied groan, and you steady yourself with your hands on his arm still squeezing around you, feeling your face heat up, “that was three days ago.”

”too long,” he mumbles, kisses slowly becoming more languid, savoring you.

when he pulls away from your neck, he doesn’t give you a moment to breathe before his lips find yours. the kiss is simple, sweet, but you can feel each beat of his pulse against your mouth.

you break the contact first, your hand slipping into his damp hair, gently brushing the long strands out of his eyes. you think out loud, admiring his perfectly framed face, “you need to cut these.”

but jeongguk isn’t currently interested in haircuts. he ignores your suggestion, his focus entirely on you, and his whispered words hold a kind of raw vulnerability, “i missed you.”

you hum, threading through his locks, “missed you too, my boy.”

that’s all he needs to close the gap between you again. this time, his kiss is more intent, deeper, as if trying to communicate what words can’t. his hands pull you closer, your chest arching into him, and in between the wet sounds of your lips meeting he lets a moan escape him.

you’re quick to swallow it, your own quiet noises vibrating against him before you put distance once again, softly tugging at his hair and finding his eyes lovingly, “let’s get home first, yeah?”

but he protests, a childlike groan reverberating in his throat, eyelids fluttering shut as he basks in the feeling of you against his lips. he attacks your cheeks next, trailing down, and down, and down, kissing you through your shirt.

then, it’s his fingers touching you under it, hand traveling up and kneading your breasts through your bra, only to slide around to trace the curve of your spine.

the sudden contact is overwhelmingly pleasuring, head thrown back on the headrest as quiet whimpers leave you. jeongguk is as hungry as ever, seeking for proximity no matter your bodies already molding with one another, his teeth scraping against your most sensitive spots, almost digging, eating, tasting.

and you want to let go, allow him to give you every last thing he’s holding onto, be selfish and take it all for yourself.

but you can’t when you know this is just another one of his escapes. he’s using this moment to drown out the chaos in his mind, to run from his pain, to bury his burdens and get high on a dopamine rush.

“baby, wait—“ in between gasps, you manage to get your voice out, but its whisper doesn’t seem to reach jeongguk’s ears, his long digits boring holes in the flesh of your bare thighs, prickling with goosebumps at his feverish touch.

in your own daze, you carefully take a hold of his face in your palms, lifting him up from the devoting motion of his lips on the edge of your shoulder, and the look in his eyes is hazed, inhebriated on the the burning of your skin under him, but it’s tinged with desperation.

behind his orbs there’s no other thought but to chase you, his only refuge, and your sweet smile only aggravates his crazed desire, trying to catch your mouth with his before you open it to speak, “i don’t want us to do this while you— you’re still mentally fragile.”

your worry is laced with love, it’s clear from the way it spills out of you, seeps from your delicate touch on his cheeks. but jeongguk’s eyes still widen in shock and shame, orbs shaking with panic.

his brows furrow in an attempt to conceal his turbulent emotions, but the city lights continuously flashing through the car windows only accentuate the glistening under his eyelids. he stammers, “i— i’m not— i’m… please. don’t reject me.”

the plea is shaky, and it makes your pulse race with agitation, fingers grasping his jaw with more intent as you’re quicker on your words than your own thoughts, “oh, honey, i’m not. look at me, please,” the way he flickers his gaze down only makes more panic flood in your veins, and you frantically search for him.

you manage to sound stable, whispered words fanning over his lips, “i just want what’s best for you, okay? do you trust me?”

he seems to lean into your touch, looking up at you through his lashes, brows still betraying him with the way they’re drawn up in sorrow. he hums in agreement.

you smile reassuringly, “perfect. then, i’ll tell you what we’re gonna do, hm?” when he nods, you continue, brushing his hair back through your calm words, “we get to my flat. take a hot shower. i make us something warm to eat. and then, if you still want to, i’m all yours. in our bed. sound good?”

our bed. the flicker in your boyfriend’s face doesn’t go missed. it’s fond, it softens his eyes, and it rushes down to his lips, struggling not to break into a grin. he pouts to hide it, and you can see he’s still ashamed by his earlier rush, his response muffled, “okay. i love you. i’m sorry.”

you coo, pulling his head to rest on your chest, drawing comforting strokes along his damp back, “i love you more. you did nothing wrong, baby.”

the both of you stay like that for a while. his cheek is squished against your breasts, lips parting to release quiet huffs, and your soothing motions run down his arm.

the quiet moment is interrupted by jeongguk’s phone ringing once again, loud and persisent, for the nth time in less than half a hour. he doesn’t even glance at the device when declining the call, and you catch the name flashing before the screen goes black.

it’s his coach calling. you stay quiet as he shuts off his phone completely, tossing it onto the empty seat next to him.

only a few moments pass before he looks up at you, his expression hesitant, a timid smile trying to mask the uncertainty in his eyes. you return his gaze with quiet confidence, nodding subtly, letting him know that you’re here with him— no matter what.

right now, all that matters is that jeongguk feels safe in your arms. you don’t care about the consequences he might face tomorrow. you’ll be there for him, just as you are now, when he needs you the most.

the moment you both step in your apartment, shoes messily discarded at the entrance (you’ll make sure to take care of his boots later), he trails after you like a lost puppy. he becomes your shadow, mirroring your every step with big eyes and a natural pout.

“take your uniform off, baby,” you gently instruct him while letting the water run from the shower head, adjusting the temperature until it’s hot enough for the both of you.

he slumps over on the toilet lid, eyes never leaving you as you move around the bathroom. when he lets them travel down your figure, a low groan escapes him.

you look so good in your skirt, the high socks triggering a weird, primal instinct in him, stirring dark fantasies that have him wishing you’d let him take you right there on the sink.

but he knows better than to mess with the plan you set earlier in his car for the both of you to enjoy the night, so he only allows himself to play with you a little, “can you do it for me? i’m tired.”

he really does seem tired, the exhaustion visible from the way his hands tremble slightly and his eyelids drop, but the look only adds to the lazy smirk spreading on his pierced lips. he knows what he’s truly asking for.

you narrow your gaze at him only to roll your eyes when he doesn’t look like he’s going to surrender any soon, grin only widening, and you pull him up by the jersey.

he complies, brows wiggling in teasing disobedience, looking down at you from his taller stance, “woah, commanding. i like it.”

“shut up,” you only murmur as you hastily strip off his sweaty uniform, throwing it right in the laundry bin. you leave him in his high socks and boxers, smacking his round ass playfully, “take these off yourself, mister.”

he’s ready to protest, to demand your touch back on him, but you shoot him a look with your raised eyebrows, “ah-ah. c’mon, and get in the shower, i’ll bring your change.”

before he can respond, you leave the bathroom. he whines childishly, slipping off his underwear along with the uncomfortable socks, adding them to the pile in the basket under the sink. he yells over the sound of running water, “you’re coming too, right?”

“yes!” you quickly call out from the bedroom, voice raised to reach him over the distance.

you know how difficult your boyfriend can be— if he hasn’t come to drag you in yet, you’re at least hoping he’s taken off the rest of his clothes. you foolishly hope he’s already in the shower, though the chances are slim if he’s not completely sure you’ll be joining him.

that’s why you move fast, grabbing his change of clothes from the drawer where you keep all his left-behind things. in your rush, you take one of his oversized t-shirt and a pair of boxers for yourself, too.

when you return to the bathroom, you’re not surprised to find jeongguk standing in the middle of it, bare and waiting for you. his eyes light up when he sees you, taking the clothes from your hold and placing them on the counter, “i was about to come and get you.”

you scoff lightly, trying to fight the smile tugging at the corners of your mouth, but it’s no use. especially when he reaches out to pull you closer, fingers working at the zip of your skirt and sliding it off with ease, his own grin warm on his expression.

you gently push him toward the shower, pretending to scold him, “i can do this myself, thank you. now get in, silly.”

with a disappointed, and very adorable huff, he finally obeys, stepping under the hot steam of water. you can tell by the subtle way his shoulder relax that the heat soothes him, but the tension doesn’t completely ease from his muscles.

he tracks your movements attentively, taking in the way you strip yourself completely bare, and only when you step in the small cabin and close the sliding window door behind you he sighs in relief.

jeongguk engulfs you immediately, positioning you both directly under the cascade of water. it blurs your vision slightly, your bangs flattening on your forehead.

you push them out of the way, your hands then finding his own hair to slick it back, allowing you to see the fondness in his eyes clearly.

you look up at him through wet lashes, chin placed on his toned chest, and his own is dipped low to meet your gaze, take in the smile spreading and making your dimples show.

it grows bigger when he sheepishly scrunches his nose, the love seeping from your orbs suddenly overwhelming, and you press a gentle kiss to his adam’s apple before pulling yourself away, voice a whisper, “let me take care of you.”

jeongguk doesn’t argue, complying when you ask to hand you his shampoo. you’d originally bought it as a joke during one of your grocery runs together, picking it off the shelf with a laugh and pointing out the label— johnson’s baby shampoo, made with honey and wheat extracts, and on sale too. you’d exclaimed how it was so jeongguk, and he’d let you try it on him as soon as you got home.

the joke had stuck, and to your surprise, he ended up liking it more than you did. now, it was the only shampoo you used on him whenever he stayed at your place, a small tradition between the two of you.

as you work it into his damp hair, jeongguk’s eyelids flutter shut. he eases into your touch, body going loose as your fingers massage his scalp with the perfect amount of pressure, the kind that always seems to make him melt, the one that could immediately put him to sleep.

you wash it off and repeat the motion once more, taking your time. only when his hair is thoroughly cleaned do you reach for your vanilla body wash, moving on to carefully lather it over his skin.

tracing every line of his body, you watch the way he softens more with your touch, unconsciously swaying closer.

you’re slow, deliberate in your motions, letting your hands run over his shoulders, down his arms, across his chest. his skin is warm and slick under your palms, and every now and then he lets out a contented sigh.

the sounds get fuller when you finally reach his back. you press a little harder, working out the knots you can feel lingering there. he groans softly, his head falling forward slightly, droplets of water dripping from his hair onto your face.

“feel good?” you ask quietly, your voice barely audible over the sound of the water.

he nods, his voice low and drowsy. “yeah, feels amazing.”

his moans grow unrestrainedly louder, eyes rolling back, and you would tease him for it if the sight of him like this wasn’t having its own effect on you.

biting your lip, you press your fingers deeper into his muscles, and suddenly his hands grip your waist, tight enough to startle you.

it has your mouth opening unconsciously, brows furrowed at the sensitivity. you almost give in when his palms slip further down, resting on the curve of your ass, and for a moment you consider the temptation, but the triumphant smirk on his face immediately pulls you out of your daze. your own fingers work to move his hands to rest at your shoulders.

you manage to sound stable, but you can feel the slight shake in your voice, “hands up here, mister.”

“oh, c’mon,” he has the audacity to whine, the sound muffled by his pouty, and so inviting lips.

you almost cave at the sight of him, his eyes wide and pleading. but you know better. if you let him push the boundaries now, things won’t stop here, and the careful rhythm you’ve set will be forgotten.

it’s not just him you’re trying to hold back— it’s yourself too, especially when his gaze almost breaks through your resolve.

you shake your head, trying to gather your composure, suddenly turning off the water and sliding the shower door open.

jeongguk groans in protest at the contrasting cold air hitting his skin, but you promptly step out to reach for your bathrobe and wrap it around him.

pout stubborn on his lips, he follows you out the shower, but instead of arguing further, he surprises you by engulfing you both in the same robe, pressing his chest against your back.

his arms circle you, and he starts rubbing the spongy material of his sleeves against your body, trying to dry you both at once.

you snort, amused by his antics, “what are you doing?”

“i’m drying us.”

“this will take us forever—”

“no, see? i’m already done,” with ease, he slips out of the robe, laying it over your shoulders and tying the belt snugly around you.

then he casually walks over to grab his change of clothes, pulling the t-shirt over his head despite the fact that his hair is still dripping with water.

you roll your eyes at the sight of it soaking into the fabric and gently push him to sit on the toilet lid, “don’t move. you’re still wet, god.”

“that’s what she said,” he wiggles his brows, eyes gleaming with immature delight as he grins mischeviously.

you sigh, struggling not to laugh at his pun. instead, you wordlessly grab the hairdryer and start running it through his damp locks.

he obediently leans into you, closing his eyes and resting his head against your chest as your fingers run along his hair. the warmth from the device makes him nuzzle even closer, his posture fully relaxed between your legs.

once his hair is dry and his clothes no longer clinging to his skin, you finally shut off the hairdryer, giving his now fluffy locks a final pat.

the time it took to dry jeongguk allowed the bathrobe to work its magic on you too. you quickly slip into his boxers and one of his many stussy t-shirts you picked randomly, tying a towel around your hair.

you prepare to head out of the bathroom, but before you can his hand gently stops you, gripping your forearm, suddenly towering over you when he stands up, “where are you going?”

“to make us dinner.”

“i’ll do it. you should dry your hair, or else you’ll get a headache.”

“but—”

“no but. you already did enough, baby. i’m okay, i swear,” his voice softens, and the fond look in his eyes makes it clear he won’t let you argue further. he doesn’t even let you respond, stepping out of the room and heading to the kitchen.

a smile tugs at your lips, and you take a deep breath, the comforting scent of vanilla and honey still lingering after he leaves.

you’ve always appreciated jeongguk’s attention to detail. he knows how long it takes you to care for your thick, long hair and also remembers the countless nights you complained about your head hurting from leaving it damp. he always listens, even to the smallest things.

twenty minutes later, you’re warm and dry, stepping into the kitchen where the delicious smell of soup greets you. jeongguk is behind the stove, stirring a pot and softly whistling as he tends to another pan on the burner.

when he notices you, his eyes brighten, trailing over your legs and the way his t-shirt sits just above your thighs, revealing glimpses of his boxers. as you approach, he grins, “what’s a pretty woman like you doing here, alone?”

you’ve been with him long enough to know this is just the start of one of his playful roleplays, so of course you instantly know your line, “i have a boyfriend, actually.”

“oh, really? is he here too? can he fight?” his voice drops lower with every step you take towards him, with the last words coming out as a growl as you stand in front of him, looking up into his eyes.

you snort, “you’re so dumb.”

he stays in character, raising his eyebrows, “no, tell me. can he?”

you hum thoughtfully, pursuing your lips as you pretend to consider, your eyes wandering before settling on his again, “yes. he’ll break your nose.”

he chuckles, feigning surprise, “god, he sounds tough.”

“he is.”

with an arm snaking around your waist, he pulls you closer, his lips brushing your ear, nose tickling your lobe, and he whispers, “but i just want you so bad, young lady. don’t tell him, hm?”

his mouth is on yours next, molding together in a sickeningly sweet, lingering kiss, and you let him find your tongue with his own, your front arching against his.

with your arms wrapped around his neck, you part slightly, your eyes jumping on every corner of his face. your voice is thick with pure love, “do you feel better, big boy?”

jeongguk smiles, presses it against your forehead, “so much better, thanks to you. i love you.”

“i love you more,” you momentarily lose yourself in his expression, and you have to blink harshly to pull yourself out of the daze before you fall too deeply into your emotions and start waxing poetic, letting your heart run as wild as the love in your veins.

you move from his hold, busying yourself with setting the small table in your kitchen, grabbing the usual pink glass for yourself and the yellow one for him.

he chose them himself a long ago, said pink reminded him of the way you blushed at his every action, and the yellow symbolized a sunflower always turning toward its sun, because, “that’s how i’ve felt ever since i met you.”

as you arrange the glasses, you almost forget what you were about to ask, but the faint ring of your phone from the bedroom reminds you, “is your phone still off? coach has been calling me.”

his brows knit slightly, betraying his otherwise calm demeanor, but he doesn't meet your eyes, focusing instead on plating the soup. “can we— not talk about it? just for tonight?”

a small gasp escapes you at his quiet plea, and you rush to his side to help him, taking the plates from him and placing them gently on the table, your words hushed, “of course, baby. i was just worried you might want to hear from him. i don’t care about all of that, i only care about you.”

a sheepish smile breaks through his composure, his front teeth worrying at his lip piercing. he looks up at you, lets himself be coddled by the warmth of your gaze, and he sounds just as timid as he looks, “hm. that’s what i wanted to hear.”

you shake your head fondly at his vulnerable side, motioning for him to sit with you, “silly. come, let’s eat, and then we can get some sleep.”

even after swallowing the burning soup, jeongguk still finds a way to tease, nudging your foot under the table with a mischievous grin.

"you’re not getting any sleep tonight," he quips, his voice low with playful intent. you roll your eyes and kick him lightly, making him yelp in exaggerated shock.

it becomes a game of back and forth, his dirty jokes pushing boundaries just enough to make you question if he’s actually serious. there’s a part of you that selfishly hopes he means it, but the side of you that knows him inside and out knows better.

sex for jeongguk isn’t just a casual thing, especially after a night like this. for the two of you, intimacy is more than physical— it’s an act of devotion, a way to connect deeply when words can’t express everything.

it’s never about distraction or escape, but about grounding one another, the flicker of something real and tender at the core of it.

tucked under the covers, waiting for him after he convinced you he could handle the dishes himself — arguing that picking a movie was just as much work — you’re not surprised by what he says when he finally enters the room.

“baby… i think i’m happy with just cuddles for tonight. that okay with you?”

you break into a big grin, brimming with unspeakable feelings for the man standing at the foot of your bed, for which you spread your arms open, “of course, sweetheart. come here, you big child.”

he doesn’t need to be told twice, instantly burrowing himself against the warm sheets, intertwining his limbs with yours. he nestles his head on your chest, sighing contentedly as if he’s found the safest place, “i love you. have i said that already?”

“a million times. and i’m never sick of it.”

“say it back.”

you snort at the insistence in his tone, words muffled by the fabric of your shirt, and your fingers unconsciously play with his straight locks as you swing one of your legs around his waist, your voice a whisper above the shuffling, “i love you more.”

he tilts his head up, chin resting on the softness of your breasts, “no, you don’t.”

brushing his bangs away from his eyes, you smile fondly, “i do. believe me.”

he huffs in faux protest, narrowing his eyes. but he gives in as quickly as he tried to argue, his cheek settling back to rest just where your heart beats, its steady beat lulling him into calm along with your gentle strokes along his nape.

jeongguk doesn’t resist it, doesn’t fight your love. accepts it as the purest form of closure he can get for himself, “hm. okay. i love you.”

1K notes · View notes

hoshifighting · 2 months ago

Text

staff!jeonghan

WARNINGS: fluff, smut, fame problems, paris trip, idol!reader is a sweetheart with her staff team, teasing, hair pulling, makeup smudging hair destroying sex, face slap, paris sex.

staff!jeonghan who started way back when your career was just taking off. you were still fresh, the kind of new that had people curious but not quite sold on the idea of you making it long term. jeonghan wasn’t even supposed to be sticking around. dude was just a freelancer, floating between gigs like it was nothing. hairdresser one week, stylist the next, maybe even photographer’s assistant if he felt like it. didn’t care much either—just did his job, got his check, and dipped.

he was there the first time you came in for a shoot, thinking, oh, here we go again, another idol who doesn’t know shit about shit, and probably treats their staff like trash. honestly, he didn’t expect anything from you. he had his walls up like crazy. you’d been doing this for, what, a hot minute? and you were already getting attention, which just made him think, “yep, this one’s probably the snobby kind. won’t even acknowledge us when she’s walking by.”

but then you went and did the most surprising thing—like blew his expectations out of the water kinda surprise. you saw him—no, not just like saw him, but like saw him. took a minute to actually chat. asked how his day was, if he needed anything while he was running around fixing the stage lights or whatever. you even remembered his name by the end of the first day, which? yeah, idols usually don’t bother with that.

fast forward a couple months, and jeonghan’s still hanging around. he didn’t plan to stay, but something about you changed that. it wasn’t even the work, really. it was more like you made things different for the whole staff—hairdressers, makeup artists, stylists, all of them. you had this habit of, like, breaking all the usual rules. you’d bring coffee for everyone in the morning, none of that half-assed, "just for my personal team" bullshit, you made sure everyone was taken care of, because they take care of you as welll.

then there was that time when you randomly called up your manager one day like, "hey, i’m taking everyone out to eat after the shoot." and jeonghan was standing there, trying not to look too surprised, but inside he was like, who the hell does that? especially in this industry where staff usually gets a handshake and a “thanks for your work” at most. while you’re out here throwing cash around to make sure your team is happy. it’s wild.

he remembers the first time you handed out those holiday bonuses. it wasn’t even from the company’s budget either; it was straight up from your own wallet. like, your money. you didn’t even make a big deal about it, just casually handed out envelopes and said, “merry christmas, you guys.” you should’ve seen their faces—everyone was shook, even him, and he doesn’t get surprised that easily. it was one of those moments where the room just, like, collectively inhaled. there was silence, and then someone—probably one of the stylists—goes, “y/n, this is... you didn’t have to...”

and you? you just shrugged, all casual, like it was no big deal. “nah, i wanted to. thank you for taking care of me, you make part of all of this too.” you pointed to the stage.

jeonghan couldn’t even look at you right for a second because it was, like, damn, okay, she’s for real. that was the moment he decided he wasn’t just gonna treat this gig like all the others. working with you? yeah, it felt different. and not in some sappy, fairytale shit kind of way, but in a “maybe there are still people in this industry who aren’t complete assholes” kind of way.

“so you’re sticking around, hannie?” you asked him one day, catching him off guard while he was fixing up your jacket right before a stage performance.

he smirked, his usual cocky, nonchalant self, but there was something softer underneath it. “guess i don’t have a choice. you make it too easy.”

he was your go-to guy now, the one you trusted with everything, from making sure your hair wasn’t fucked up during press tours to giving you a reality check when you were stressing over the dumbest things. and he liked that. he liked being the one you leaned on when you didn’t wanna bother anyone else.

but it was more than that too. you were just different. the way you treated people, the way you made sure everyone around you felt seen, felt valued? it wasn’t fake. it wasn’t for show. it was you. and jeonghan? well, he wasn’t the kind of guy to stick around just for anyone. but for you? yeah, maybe he’d go the long haul.

jeonghan was always there, like a constant shadow that somehow made everything feel lighter instead of heavier. as your career blew up, he didn’t just keep pace—he matched your energy, your needs, every twist and turn that came with your fame. whether it was press tours, backstage chaos, or those ridiculous interviews where some clueless host would try to push your boundaries, he was always ready.

you’d be in the middle of a tv show, mind racing, and then there’d be a subtle shift. jeonghan standing just offstage, watching with a sharp, gaze of his. and it wasn’t like he had to do much—sometimes just a look was enough to let you know he had your back. like that time they tried to switch up your routine last minute, making changes that didn’t sit right with you. you didn’t even need to speak up, though. before you could say a word, he was already stepping in, throwing that effortless, yet somehow intimidating smile toward the team. “nah, we’re sticking with the original plan. my artist doesn’t do changes without notice.”

“your artist,” you’d hear him say that a lot, like a protective label stamped right over you, like you belonged to him—not in a possessive way, but in a way that made you feel safe. secure.

it wasn’t just about the work either, not even close. jeonghan made the loneliness that came with fame feel less suffocating. that part of fame nobody talks about—the part where you can’t make real friends anymore, where every new person in your life feels temporary, transactional. except him. he was loyal.

when you had those long, grueling days full of photoshoots and interviews and events, and all you wanted was to escape, jeonghan was the one who made sure you still had a piece of normal.

like that one time in paris. you were there for a fashion show, sitting front row with all these industry giants who couldn’t care less about anything but themselves, and jeonghan was right beside you, but afterward, when it was just the two of you, he was the one who dragged you to some random hole-in-the-wall restaurant down the street, far from all the cameras and flashing lights, ordering too much food and laughing at how terrible your french was.

“you know, you’re lucky you’ve got me,” he teased, watching you struggle with the menu. “otherwise, you’d be stuck ordering water and bread for the rest of the trip.”

you elbowed him playfully. “i’m just trying to be cultured, okay?”

“sure, sure,” he snickered, but the grin on his face was soft, like he was glad to be there with you. “leave the culture to me.”

he was there on the quieter days too. you’d be at home, no schedule to follow for once, just free. but that freedom? it felt empty when you didn’t have anyone to share it with. jeonghan got that. he’d show up at your place without even needing an invitation, like he just knew when you needed him there. sometimes he wouldn’t even knock. you’d just hear the door click open and his familiar voice, “you better not be working in there.”

you’d laugh, shouting back from wherever you were in the apartment, “i’m not, calm down.”

next thing you knew, he’d be on the floor of your pristine living room, surrounded by lego pieces because, for some reason, that’s what the two of you did on your days off. it was ridiculous, really, two adults crouched over colorful plastic blocks, but it made you feel like a kid again, like before everything got so complicated.

you’d crouch down next to him, watching his hands move, and without thinking, you’d wrap your arms around him from behind, pressing your cheek against his shoulder. it wasn’t even romaaaantic, more like instinct. jeonghan had this way of making you feel safe, like you didn’t have to be the perfect version of yourself all the time. you could just be you. and hugging him like that, clinging onto him like a koala, it was the only way you knew how to show him just how much he meant to you.

“you’re clingy today,” he murmured, but there was no complaint in his voice, just that familiar teasing.

“you’re soft,” you shot back, squeezing him tighter, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. his cologne was subtle but always the same, something that reminded you of quiet, peaceful moments, like this.

he tilted his head a little, catching your eyes “oh, yeah? not what you said last time.”

you puffed your cheeks out, crossing your arms dramatically, the sulk settling in. “i’m done being clingy with you, jeonghan.”

he grinned like he was waiting for that exact reaction. it’s almost like he lived for these moments—when you’d pout and try to act all tough, but really? he knew exactly where this was headed. you weren’t fooling anyone, especially not him.

“oh yeah?” he tilted his head, gaze dripping with amusement as he leaned in, close enough that his breath brushed your ear. “you sure about that?”

you tried to hold firm, but the way his voice dropped a little lower, teasing. you shifted your weight, crossing your legs under you on the living room floor, avoiding eye contact. “mmhmm. you’ll see.”

jeonghan let out a soft chuckle, leaning back and watching you with a glint in his eyes, like he was just waiting for you to crack. “you’re too cute when you sulk, y’know that?”

your heart fluttered, but you bit down on the inside of your cheek, determined to keep up the act. “whatever.”

he moved closer, a hand sliding around your waist, tugging you just enough so that your body leaned into his. “nah, don’t pout, baby,” he murmured, lips brushing lightly against your jaw. “we both know how this ends.”

and he was right. because, every time you tried to act like you were done with him, like you were going to keep your distance, it only ended one way—with you wet underneath him, a needy mess, begging for more.

like that first time in paris. paris had done something to the both of you. it was supposed to be a normal night, just you and him hanging out after the fashion show. nothing special, just another city on the endless list of places you’d been together. but somehow, that night went different. the second the hotel room door clicked shut behind you, you’d scarcely made it through the door before his hands were on you, grabbing, pulling, claiming.

“thought you were gonna keep your distance,” jeonghan had teased as he pressed you up against the wall, his lips trailing down your neck, making your knees weak.

you were already panting, feeling the warmness of him beaming off his body. “shut up, hannie.”

he chuckled against your skin, his tongue flicking out to taste you, making you gasp. “aww, so cute when you’re needy.”

and fuck, were you needy. by the time he’d pushed you onto the bed, tugging at your clothes, you were already whimpering for him, already soaked.

he’d dragged you to the edge, rough hands all over your body, pulling, squeezing, leaving marks everywhere. your hair had been perfect for the show, all sleek and done up, but that shit didn’t last long. the second he had his fist tangled in it, pulling your head back, it was ruined. thrusting into you from behind, his cock splitting you in half with each brutal thrust. “such a fucking mess.”

you’d tried to keep quiet, biting down on the pillow as your body rocked with every movement, but every time you let out a whiny moan, jeonghan was right there to mock you for it.

“aww, hannie’s being too harsh?” he cooed, as he tries to sound sweet. “hm? poor baby can’t take it?”

you’d only moaned louder, your body trembling as he slapped your ass, the sting making you cry out. he’d leaned down then, his breath hot against your ear as he whispered, “use your words, sweetheart. tell hannie how bad you want it.”

you couldn’t even speak, just a mess of broken moans and gasps as he kept slamming into you, the sound of skin against skin echoing through the room. and just when you thought you couldn’t take it anymore, when you were right on the edge, that’s when he did it. his hand came up to your face, smudging the glitter from the show as he slapped you—not enough to really hurt. he is a careful guy.

“fuck, y/n, look at you. such a pretty little mess,” he groaned, his grip on your hair tightening as he pounded into you from behind, relentless. “you gonna come for me? c’mon, baby, let me hear it.”

you whimpered, nodding, your mind spinning as his cock hit that perfect spot over and over, making you roll your eyes, drool, everything u had right of. but just as you were about to cum, he pulled out, leaving you empty and desperate.

“aww, no no no, not yet,” jeonghan cooed, a wicked grin on his face as he turned you onto your back, pushing your legs open wide. “hannie’s not done with you.”

your heart pounded, your entire body aching for release, but you didn’t dare move. he was in control, and you knew better than to push him.

“what’s the matter, baby?” he leaned down, his lips brushing over yours as he teased you. “too much?”

you shook your head, barely able to get the words out. “n-no… please…”

his smirk widened, that wicked glint in his eyes making you shiver. “please what? gotta tell me what you want, sweetheart.”

you whimpered, your hands gripping the sheets as you looked up at him, desperate. “please… fuck me…”

“good girl.”

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