#mom said to my aunt that she sometimes wishes she had a son to do physical work for her/my dad

[lycan-subscribe]

i would really really love it if cis people would like. think before they speak Once in their fucking lives

[sweetbonniebel]

Jaes's hen jēdar

God's of the sky

Eleven

Daemon x reader

Synopsis: Laenor’s funereal, politics. Alicent being a bad mom, Viserys being a idiot. Talk of Rhaenyra having more power.

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122 AC Driftmark

Five dragons left Bloodstone for Driftmark. Another funureal of a Velaryon. Baelon sat in front of Daemon, strapped by leather belts. Vhaenor was in Aegon's saddle and Aerion was held by you.

Vermithor the largest of the beasts flew ahead. Your youngest slept soundly strapped to your chest with cotton wraps. Occasionally involuntary moving in the swaddle.

You felt sorry for Rhaenyra, not only did she loose Harwin not long ago now her husband has perished. And what of Jace, Luke and Joffrey.

You heard the familiar screeches of Caraxes and the warmth of dragon fire, you glanced upwards to see the blood wyrm, Sunfyre and Moondancer chasing each other.

Rhaenys and Corlys looked awful, they lost all of their children in the span of four years.

Your favourite cousin looks bad clad in black, but that colour seemed to follow her. You wrapped your arms around Rhaenys, offering her your comforts.

"I am so sorry, Rhaenys, Corlys." You said taking Rhaenys's hands in yours.

"Thank you, cousin." The Queen who never was answered.

"We are glad you could make it." She forced a facade of confidence.

"It is all right, you do not need to fake being nice. You just lost your son, I would except you to scream, cry and rage."

"I have done my fair share of mourning already, Laena and now Laenor." She whispered, tears prickling her waterline.

"Whatever you need we and the Stepstones are at your disposal." You offered.

"Thank you, y/n." Corlys answered placing his palm on your shoulder, squeezing thankfully.

You returned to your family at the side of the cliffs, on the other side closer to the casket stood Rhaenyra and her three boys.

"Mama." Vhaenor tugged at your black mourning skirt.

"What is it?" You questioned leaning to his level.

"I'm sad." He muttered shyly, you smiled sadly at him. "I don't like it."

"Oh sweet boy, it is normal to feel sad sometimes. Especially when a member of your family passed. But soon you will feel better, the feeling will pass." You tried to console the two year old

"It will?" He hopefully asked.

"I'm sure of it."

Laenor's sea stone casket was being wrapped with ropes, soldiers of house Velaryon prepared to lower it into the salty sea.

You saw tears escape Rhaenya's and Laenor's children, the three boys wore teal doublets adorned with silver seahorses and black trousers. Jacaerys looked the most like his grandmother, Rhaenys with dark hair and indigo eyes.

Lucerys was most like his mother, silver-gold hair and blue eyes, while Joffrey named by Laenor was most like his father, curly dark hair with silver streaks and violet eyes but his face was entirely Laenor.

Your children with Daemon on the other hand were of typical Valyrian beauty. Baelon had silver hair and bright violet eyes, his eye and nose shape were just like Daemon's. Vhaenor was your spitting image with your red eyes and face shape.

Aerion was most like his grandmother Alyssa, Daemon said so. You never met your father's first wife but from what your brothers said, Aerion was very much like Alyssa.

You wondered what will Rhaenyra do now, her husband has perished, she has three children but she is still young. The realm will expect her to marry again. 

You took your children by their hands and walked over to where the realm’s delight was standing. You stared solemnly at Rhaenyra, you placed a hand on her cheek and brought the princess into a warm embrace. No words exchanged but that was fine, none were needed. 

The three boys standing around Rhaenyra on the other hand, looked at you with muted curiosity. 

„Jace, Luke, Joff this is your aunt Princess y/n.” Rhaenyra introduced, you kneeled next to the boys. 

„I’m sure you do not remember me, but we have met a few times before.” You said placing your palm on Jace’s rosy cheek. 

„Good morrow, princess.” Jace shyly answered. 

„You can call me aunt, Jace.” The dark haired boy nodded his head sheepishly. 

„I would like to introduce your cousins to you.” You slightly pushed Baelon and Vhaenor in front of the three Velaryons. 

The eldest of your princelings slightly bowed his head at them. 

„I’m Baelon.” He introduced himself „This is my brother Vhaenor, and the babe is Aerion.” 

„I’m Jacaerys this is Lucerys and Joffrey.” You watched as the two boys interacted. 

„How are you faring?” You questioned Rhaenyra leaving your sons to themselves. 

„It is not as hard as I thought it will be. I did love him, but it was more of a brotherly love. I’m thankful for the children we have…” She told you her thoughts and you listened intently. „I’m glad we left for Dragonstone when we did, I do not think I could have endured more of that vipers den. And Laenor, gods save him. He was a good father but not much more than that.” 

You slightly chuckled as you talked in a secluded area. 

„Do you think you’ll remarry?” You suddenly questioned. 

„I have a lover I am very close to… But I do not want to marry so soon. I wish to experience more freedom.” She answered smoothing her black gown with teal accents. 

„A lover you say?” You curiously asked, you saw as a blush spread on Rhaenyra’s pale face. 

„He is a noble man from Lys.” 

„Lys?” 

„Darys Ormollen.” She said without beating around the bush. 

„You do not mean… Aunt Saera’s son.” You remembered the name you heard in passing conversation. The heir only nodded. „How did you come to meet our cousin?” 

„It is a long story.” 

„I would love to hear it some day, and meet him. Perhaps we could even invite aunt Saera to the Stepstones.” 

„I don’t think she will accept but you can always try.” 

„It is important for our family to be together. Besides I didn’t even know she was married for a long time, Jaehaerys told me of Saera a few times but nothing of her life outside of the Seven Kingdoms.” 

The funereal procession started. The heads of house Celtigar, Massey, Darklyn and Bar Emmom were present. Corlys’s brother Aethan, delivered the eulogy. You watched with Rhaenyra your children and Daemon as Laenor’s casket was lowered into the sea. The same way Laena’s was four years ago. Baelon and Vhaenor were standing next to their cousins. Aerion was in your arms and Joffrey was in Rhaenyra’s. 

„May the winds guide into the the afterlife, nephew.” Aethan recited „For our words are the old, the true, the brave. You may not have been old, but you were true and brave.” 

You saw tears stain Jacaerys’s and Lucerys’s cheeks, your palms rested on their shoulders. With the back of your palm you wiped their tears. 

…

You watched as Viserys stumbled down the cliffs with Alicent and Otto by his side. Helaena and Aemond following after them. You approached his grace with Daemon and your children. 

„Your grace.” You bowed before your sickly brother. 

„Oh, y/n.” He wheezed „You certainly are a sight for sore eyes.” He placed his boney palm on your cheek. 

„Brother, you do not look well. Are the maesters treating you well? If you wish I can call upon my healers from Essos.” You offered putting your hand over his. 

„The maesters are taking great care of his grace. They do best they can.” Alicent butted in. 

„Perhaps their best isn’t enough.” Your husband snipped staring with wide eyes at his brother’s worsening condition. 

„Hush now husband I am sure the maesters are… healing our brother to the best of their abilities. Even if they are not enough.” 

„And your children, your highness?” Otto muttered chanting the subject „Happy news reached King’s Ladning that new dragons hatched.” 

„Yes, lord hand. Five dragons indeed hatched.” 

„And since when are you interested in dragon, Otto? I remember you said they are an abomination to your gods.” Daemon carelessly said. You tried to surpress a chuckle. Viserys through his hazines glanced disappointed at Otto. 

„Speaking of children, your graces we must return to them.” 

„And where is Aegon? He has not come greet me or his lord father.” Alicent questioned accusatory.  

„Aegon is with his cousins.” Your brother answered for you. 

„So you saddle him with taking care of babes, now?” The green Queen made a snide comment. 

„Oh not at all, your grace. He is simply offering his comforts to Baela and Rhaena. After all they just lost and uncle.” You intertwined your arm with Daemon. 

„I see.” She only muttered and the two of you left, returning to your children’s side. 

„Have you seen him? He looks like the stranger is eating him alive.” You whispered to Daemon, he nodded and squeezed you hand reassuringly. 

„The greens are ordering the maesters to be worsening his condition.” 

„We need our healers to take a look at him.” 

„And what if they don’t do anything?” 

You stayed quiet, consumed by thoughts on how to turn this situation in your favor. 

„What are you thinking of?” 

„Do you remember when our grandsire named father his hand when he was too sick to rule?” 

„You do not think..?” 

You nodded at your brother. 

„Viserys is sick, the greens control the throne. Rhaenyra is his heir, she should become her fathers regent and wear his crown.” 

The two children of Baelon the brave stared at Rhaenyra from afar. She and her children stood alone amongs the cliffs and salty sea. 

„It could work, but Otto is still hand. He will go against this, the council will side with him.” Daemon noticed, caressing your hand affectionately. 

„Then we have to think of a way to find new members of the small council, those who will be unwaveringly loyal to ’Nyra. And us of course. Still we have to get rid of Otto somehow, name a new hand.” 

„Corlys…He hates the greens as much as we do. His house is the richest in the seven kingdoms. He is old and experienced.” 

Your eyes widened surprised. 

„You would not want to be hand? I know you pestered Viserys for that position.” 

„I used to, but we would have to move to King’s Landing. I do not want to leave the Stepstones, I do not want our children to be raised there. At least on Bloodstone we are the rulers of our own lives, Baela and Rhaena are happy there and so is Aegon.” 

„You have changed.” You stated, a warm feeling spread in your insides. 

„Does my wife, enjoy it?” He teasingly questioned placing his large palms on your waist. 

„Very much so.” You smiled leaning into his warm embrace. 

„Your highness.” Annora approached the two of you with Aerion in her arms. He was fussing, you could see tears stain his chubby cheeks. „I’m sorry but he could not stop crying.” 

„It is fine, thank you.” You answered taking Aerion, he will be turning one soon.

„You coddle him.” Daemon stated taking him from your arms and into his. You could see that he started to wiggle in discomfort.

„Maybe he’s hungry.” You said feeling your sore breasts. 

„No, he is spoilt. You always hold him, you didn’t do that with Baelon or Vhaenor.” 

„It’s just… he’s so small.” 

„He’s healthy, my love. He’ll be fine without your embrace for a while.” Your husband answered keeping Aerion in his arms. 

You walked with Daemon through castle Driftmark. A dreary seat, even more than Dragonstone. Your children were taken to a spare nursery, that left you and Daemon in your temporary chambers. 

You sighed and begun to unlace the black mourning dress with silver accents. 

„Do you need help?” Daemon approached you from behind, without and answer he began to unlace the bodice and dress. 

„I need to change into something more comfortable.” You announced „This dress squeezes my breasts and I cannot take it anymore.” 

„Perhaps you are due to a visit to the tailor?” Daemon muttered sliding the fabric off your body. You raised your silver eyebrow. 

„Are you saying I’m too fat for my dresses?” 

„No, your tits are too big to fit in that dress. Although I do like to see them spill out of your cleavage. Perhaps I was wrong to mention a tailor.” Your husband teased caressing the side of your breast with his thumb. 

„I wasn’t so big after Vhaenor…” You stated staring at yourself in the mirror. 

„You aren’t big, y/n.” 

„Do you want more children?” You questioned turning to face Daemon, dressed in cotton underdress. 

„I want as many children as you will give me.” He leaned against your forehead. 

„A girl, then.” 

„A girl?” Daemon pressed a kiss to your neck, his hands roamed over your body. „As you wish, wife.” 

…

You slept comfortably tangled in Daemon’s arms, the bed was not as comfortable as the one you shared on Bloodstone. A knock stirred you out of sleep, you tried to ignore the sound but it was persistent. You groaned and wrapped your body in a silver robe and opened the door. 

„Aegon? What has happened so early?” You questioned leaning on the door frame. 

„His grace invited you and your family to break fast together.” He nervously said. 

„Now?” 

„In an hour or so.” 

„Why are you telling me this? You are not a servant.” 

„I’m… What if they order me to return with them?” You sighed at his broken heart expression, you wrapped him in your arms and caressed his messy silver gold hair. 

„I will fight to keep you with me.” You answers pressing a kiss to his temple. 

„Promise?” 

„I promise. Now go back to your chambers and dress, preferably in black it is a funeral after all.” 

He nodded and skipped off to your chambers, you sighed and pressed your hand against your forehead. It was too early for political warfare, you felt tired and a bit sore from the strenuous activities of the night before. 

You walked over to the bed where your husband laid, his naked back spread comfortably over the bed. 

„Daemon.” You nudged him, he groaned and turned away from you, you chuckled and sat on his abdomen keeping him in place. „Daemon.” You  whispered into his ear.

„hmm?” He murmured waking from sleep. 

„We are invited to break fast with our brother.” 

„How do you expect me to leave when I have you on top of me?” He cheekily said, your cheeks warmed and you felt him growing hard under you. 

„We do not have time…” You whispered. 

…

Your black dress with embroidered red dragon’s breath swayed with your movement. The long sleeves of the dress were in Baelon’s clutches as he walked next to you unsure. He did not like castle Driftmark nor did he like the sea. 

„Your highness.” Ser Erryk and Arryk Cargyll bowed as they guarded the King’s chambers. 

„Sers.” You answered and entered your brothers room with your family. 

Viserys barely lucid sat at a round table in the corner of the room, a weird smelling incense was burning in the chambers. 

You kissed his healthier cheek and took a place on his right, Daemon to his left. 

„Where is Alicent and the children?” You questioned. 

„It will be just us, my siblings.” He wheezed back, motioning for the servant to bring the food. 

„What is that smell?” Daemon asked sniffing the air. 

„Oh it is- it is an ailment the maesters prescribed.” Your brother answered breathlessly, you nodded at Daemon to put out the poison and open the windows. 

„I’m afraid it’s making the children a bit queasy, you do not mind if we open the windows?” You took Viserys’s hand in yours. He simply nodded and glanced at your eldest, Baelon. 

„And how are you, my nephew?” Viserys asked, the two boys looked at him unsure. Aerion stayed in the nursery. 

„I’m well, your grace.” The four year old answered playing with the hem of his doublet under the table. 

„There is…no need to call me your grace. I am your uncle you may adres me as such.” Your brother said, you smiled seeing the love he held for his family. „I heard you have a dragon.” 

„Yes! I call him Aegarax, he’s brave like Darren!” Baelon exclaimed happy to talk about his hatchling, simply forgetting the uneasiness he felt before. 

„You named him right, Baelon a strong name.” He turned to you. 

„Thank you, I do not remember our father but the stories grandsire told me of him makes me feel as if I did get to know him.” 

„And where is the babe?” He questioned. 

„In his nursery.” Daemon answered. 

„Viserys… do you think it well to name a regent?” You gently coaxed him into the new topic. 

„Regent? Otto is my hand, he does well in my absence.” His grace wheezed. 

„And how often does he rule in your absence. I’ve been hearing that he sits the throne every day.” Daemon a bit more harsh added. 

„My sickness keeps me abed most days, yes.” 

„Even the greatest Kings get sick or old and they need help. Their family’s help. Remember Jaehaerys? He named Baelon his hand and regent.” 

„Yes, father was an excellent hand despite his short time serving the role.” Viserys agreed. You noticed that once the incense cleared your brother seemed to get a bit better. More lucid. 

„Rhaenyra is your heir, you should let her take more responsibility. She is after all the future Queen.” 

Viserys pondered for a moment, he glanced at you then at Daemon. 

„Perhaps you are right…” He admitted. „I will have to talk with the council of this change.”

You sent a small smile in your husbands direction, he returned the gesture smugly. The Hightowers have controlled the throne far too long, as true dragons it was your duty to stop their rule.

The bigger problem however was Alicent Hightower, you couldn't dismiss a Queen as easily as a Hand. You knew Viserys never loved her, he may hold some affection for her but it couldn't compare to the feelings he held for Aemma.

"Have you thought of Aegon returning to King's Landing?" You suddenly asked, your brother raised his eyebrow. It is as if he just remembered he has a son.

"Oh yes... Aegon."

"He's turning into a man soon, brother." Daemon added.

"I suppose he is... what is the issue then?"

"Aegon doesn't want to return to the Red Keep." You stated matter of factly.

"Why wouldn't he? His siblings and mother are there." He said unaware.

"That castle is a viper's den, it is no surprise a boy of only five and ten wouldn't want to stay there. After he was raised for over a decade in a loving home."

"Alicent is his mother it is her choice in the end."

"You are the King, Viserys. I'm sure it wouldn't be out of the ordinary for you to have the last say. I'm sure Aegon would be thankful." You stated

"I..." He wheezed "Bring him." He ordered.

Aegon dressed in a black doublet and trousers, the cape on his shoulders was of a deep crimson.

"Your grace." He bowed his head slightly at his sitting father "Aunt, Uncle."

"Aegon, sit." He ordered, the boy took a seat next to his little cousins. You smiled symphatically at Aegon as he uncomfortably cowered under Viserys's gaze. "I have heard you wish to stay with your aunt and uncle, is this true?"

"...Yes, father." He nodded unsure.

"I see no reason to-" Viserys was cut off in the middle of the sentence, the doors opened and Alicent stepped in the chambers. Her dark green dress flowing after he movements.

"Husband, son. Princess y/n, Prince Daemon." She was out of breath as she acknowledged your presence.

"Alicent." Viserys wheezed "What are you doing here? I... I didn't call for you."

"I came to see my son." Aegon tensed at his mothers words.

"We have just been talking of extending his wardship." Viserys answered and in that moment you wanted to commit treason and strangle your brother for his idiocy.

"What?" She asked in disbelief.

"I wish to stay with my aunt and uncle, your grace." Aegon meekly said.

"That is out of the question. Your wardship has come to an end, there is no reason for you to stay on that rock any longer."

"Lady Mother-" He wanted to speak but Alicent silenced him with a flick of her wrist.

"And you would allow this?" She glared at Viserys "For them to take away my son from me? Again?"

"I am not taken away anywhere, I want to remain with my cousins and aunt." Aegon explained but Alicent ignored his pleas.

"Aegon..." You whispered to the boy who had tears in his eyes.

"Don't you see Viserys! She has raised my son! Poisoned him against me, and his family!"

"Alicent! Mind your tongue. My sister has done and admirable job at raising Aegon, you should be thanking her instead of spitting such vile accusations." Viserys said angrily glaring at his Hightower wife. "If it is Aegon's wish to remain in the stepsons he may do so until his eight and tenth birthday when he shall return to King's Landing."

"My King-" Alicent tried to speak.

"My decision is final, Alicent."

King Viserys's health has deteriorated over the years making him incapable of sitting the throne. He named his heir Princess Rhaenyra regent until he would be able to rule once more. Many believe that is is Princess y/n and Prince Daemon's doing for the realm delight to sit the throne. - From the dragon bringer by the feather and quill of Grand Maester Roland.

Taglist:

@nessjo

[ladykailitha]

Grief (A Friend Indeed) Part 3

Hello, hello. I am so grateful for the amount of support this story has gotten. It's been plotted out, it just needs to get written up. I'm not sure how long it's going to be, but if I know anything about myself, LONG.

Part 1 Part 2

***

Pulling into the truck stop was the hardest thing Eddie had ever done and he faced down dozens of demobats. He slowed to a stop, tires crunching on the gravel.

Thankfully Wayne was already there and waiting for them. He gently shook Steve awake.

“Hey,” he murmured. “You need to get up and walk around. Get the blood flowing again.”

Steve blinked at him blearily. “Yeah, okay.”

Eddie shook his head and climbed out the car. He walked over to Wayne as Steve stumbled out and onto the dust filled gravel.

“Your boy okay?” Wayne asked, watching Steve walk into the bathroom.

Eddie looked back at his friend and then back to him. “I don’t think so. But I don’t know how to fix it.”

Wayne just shook his head. “Don’t you be thinking about fixing shit, son. He’ll let you in when he’s ready. Just be there for him. That’s all you need to do.”

Eddie sighed. “I’m the one on my way to a fucking funeral but Steve seems like he’s grieving more than I am.”

“You told me last night that he had family in Kentucky?” Wayne asked.

He nodded. “I don’t know if any of Steve’s mom’s family is left, but his grandma used live in Lexington before she died when he was little.”

Wayne hummed. “Your dad went to school with Clint Harrington, a pleasure I thankfully missed out on, having already graduated by the time our parents moved to Indiana. I stayed in Kentucky until a social worker showed up on my doorstep with you. You were used to living in Indiana at that point so I moved out there. Went back to the town your grandparents raised Al to raise you.”

Eddie frowned. “Then how did Grandma move back to Kentucky?”

“After your grandfather died,” Wayne explained, “he wanted to buried in the family plot. She fully intended to move back to Hawkins to help with you, but she fell and broke her hip.”

Eddie sighed. “And since you were already taking care of me, it was Aunt Penny that took her in?”

Wayne nodded. “All this to say that family is complicated. And grief is a funny thing. You can think you’re over it and something: a smell, a piece of a song, a person walking down the street and suddenly it’s as fresh as the day it happened.”

He knew. He felt that way about his mom all the time. Sometimes it was as simple as picking up her old guitar and strumming a note. Sometimes it would something one of the kids did or said. He knew.

“I wish I hadn’t asked him to come,” he groused.

“I don’t,” Wayne said fiercely. “I think we all need this trip for one reason or another.”

Steve walked back out of the gas station looking a little more lively. Eddie waved and Steve smiled, breaking into a jog to join them.

“Hey,” he said a little winded. “You didn’t have to let me sleep like that.”

Eddie smiled back. “Nah, you needed it.” He pulled Steve’s keys out of his pocket and tossed it to him. “It’s your turn to drive.”

Steve laughed. “Yeah, okay.”

“Eddie was just telling me your mom came from Kentucky,” Wayne said gently.

Steve smile faltered a bit. “From Lexington. She’s a Lexington Kincade.”

Wayne blinked a moment. “Holy shit, son. When you said you were wealthy I didn’t realize you meant that kind of money.”

Steve shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t like talking about it. I haven’t seen that side of my family since I was little. Her two older brothers, one got the business, the other got the house, but my mom got all the money. They never forgave her for that.”

Wayne nodded. “Even though the house and the business were worth more than the cash, money makes good people go mad.”

Steve looked him in the eye. “I know.”

“Never said you didn’t, son,” he assured him. “I’m sure you know better than most. I’m just commiserating.”

“Thank you,” Steve murmured. “Most people try to tell me to stop whining about it. I can have whatever I want, so that means I can’t miss the simpler things.”

“Go get gassed up,” Wayne said with a smile, “and then we’ll hop back on the road.”

Steve nodded.

“And stay close behind me,” he warned. “I don’t want you getting lost. Ed knows the way but it’ll be better if you don’t beat me there, okay?”

“Outsiders get met with shot guns,” Steve muttered darkly. “I’m aware.”

He pounded Steve on the shoulder and slipped back into his truck. He watched as Steve and Eddie chatted as Steve filled up the car. They walked in together and were back out with more sodas.

When they were securely nestled in Steve’s BMW, Wayne pulled back out into traffic, Steve following close behind.

Every time he glanced in his review mirror, a small smile crept on his face. Those two boys were good for each other.

*

They pulled into a old white house with a large front porch. There was a beat up brass colored 1972 F150 on the lawn and dark blue Chevy Cavalier in the drive way.

The steps sagged and the paint was peeling. Steve was in love. He adored places like this. Because it was someone’s home and not just their house.

There was a woman standing on the front porch, leaning against the supports at the top of the stairs. Her hair was dark and straight, she had brown eyes and a round form. Steve could tell she had worked hard her whole life.

And without a doubt she was going to judge him for not having done the same.

Wayne and Eddie were by his side in an instant though, closing ranks against the woman on the porch. Which meant this was the fabled Aunt Penny.

Steve couldn’t help but wonder how in the hell did Wayne turn out the way he did with siblings like Penny and Al.

“Penny,” Wayne greeted.

“Wayne,” she greeted back dryly. “I wasn’t too keen about you bringing a stranger along. Still can’t say I am on the sight of him.”

Steve popped his hip. “Oh bless your heart, I didn’t realize that I had to be blood-related to want to be there for Eddie and Wayne in their time of mourning.”

Wayne’s eyes went wide as he slowly turned to Steve with his whole body.

Eddie’s jaw dropped before he began cackling.

Penny looked him up and down again. “You’ll do.” And walked back into the house.

“Boy, you got a death wish?” Wayne asked after his sister went inside.

Steve scoffed. “No, but I wasn’t going to let her set the tone for this trip. If I didn’t stick up for myself now, she would spend the trip walking over me, and I haven’t been through hell to have some woman completely unrelated to me be that fucking rude.”

Eddie clasped his hands to his chest and fluttered his eyelashes at Steve. “My hero!” He swooned against the car causing Steve to laugh.

“Come on, you menace,” he said shaking his head fondly. He held out his hand to help Eddie up, but he popped up like a daisy and swanned past him.

Wayne gripped Steve’s shoulder again. “She’s a tough old bird, my sister, but I think you’ll get along with her kids just fine.”

“You want to give me a rundown before I go charging into the hornets’ nest?”

He cocked his head to the side and then cheerfully chirped. “No.” He turned on his heel and walked into the house without preamble.

Steve shook his head. It was looking like it was going to be really long week.

*

Steve walked into a room that would have barely fit in his kitchen. But the furniture looked comfortable and the room itself, inviting.

What wasn’t so inviting was the glares he was getting from half the people in the room. These must be the cousins. There were three girls and a boy.

The oldest of the girls was a curly-haired redhead about his age or a little younger. But unlike the orange color of Max’s hair it was more like a rich auburn. It was piled on her freckled head in an untidy mass to try and beat the last of the summer heat. She wore a pair of cutoff jean shorts and a white t-shirt tied up under her chest.

The younger of the two girls and clearly the youngest, had dark hair and eyes. She looked to be Holly’s age. She wore a rainbow shirt and coveralls that had been drawn and colored on. Her hair was in two braids that did remind him of Max.

The only boy wore an expression that would have put Mike’s surly sneer to shame. Like his younger sister, his hair and eyes were dark, but his hair was curly like his older sister’s. He was in that awkward middle stage of growth where everything all at once too big and too small.

His style matched that of Eddie’s, ripped black jeans and band shirt that Steve couldn’t read the name of because of the swirling font. He knew Eddie would scoff at him about that later.

Eddie bounced up to Steve with a grin. “Let’s get you to a phone so you can call Robin.”

Steve nodded as Eddie led the way to the kitchen. They came back out a minute later and Eddie waved his arm at the assembled family.

“Stevie, these are the Nelsons. The Mike wannabe is Oliver, the cutie-patootie is Abigail, call her Gale, not Abby. She kicks.” Steve snorted. He could believe it. She reminded him a bit of Erica in that way. “And the eldest and smartest of my aunt’s brood is Lauren. She is the best person you’ll ever meet.”

Steve scoffed. “I think Robin would fight her for that title.”

Eddie laughed.

Oliver glared at him. “Who’s Mike?”

Steve looked him up and down. “He’s one of the kids I used to babysit. Smart kid with a barbed tongue. He’s in Eddie’s old club, Hellfire. Plays a level thirteen paladin.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow, impressed.

Oliver rolled his eyes. “Yeah and just how old is this wizkid?”

“Fifteen,” Steve said with a shrug. “But I’m not sure he’s the smartest of his Party. Dustin built a CV tower from scraps in his basement. Then there’s Will who is a DM like Eddie. Really creative. Can paint and draw. And there’s Lucas. He’s just as smart as Mike, but he also helped his basketball team win the championship as a freshman. They all are in Hellfire, in fact.”

Oliver narrowed his eyes. “I don’t believe you. You just made them up.”

Eddie licked the top of his teeth slowly. “Nope, they’re really real.”

Steve pulled out his wallet and took out a picture. He handed it to Oliver. He pointed to each one in turn, naming them and then snatched the picture back.

“Why would you need to babysit?” Oliver asked, knowing he couldn’t win the argument about them being real. “I know designer clothes when I see them. You clearly don’t need the money.��

“I like kids, but especially those kids.”

Eddie smirked. “They like you, too.” He paused and tapped his lips for a second. “Well...except Mike.”

“Comes with dating his older sister at one point,” Steve said with a shrug.

“I still don’t know why you guys never could make it work,” Eddie said with a frown. It was something he couldn’t get out of... well, any of them really.

Steve looked down at the picture. He put it away and then pinched the bridge of his nose and rubbed the end. “Her best friend died in my pool while we were dating. It was a party at my house. She blamed herself, but I think she mostly blamed me.”

The room went deathly silent. A pin landing on the soft carpet would have sounded like a bomb going off.

“Aaaannnddd...” Lauren said bouncing up from her chair, “that’s about enough of that.” She smacked the back of Oliver’s head. “You were begging for trouble with that one, dipshit.”

She grabbed Steve’s arm and started dragging him over to the sofa. “You’re going to come over here with me and tell me all about Robin so I can be the judge of who is more awesome and why it’s obviously me.”

Eddie breathed a sigh of relief as Lauren defused the situation. Because holy fucking shit. Now he knew why no one wanted to talk about it.

Wayne came up beside him. “Who’s he talking about, son?”

Eddie chewed on his lip. “I think he’s talking about Barb Holland. Nancy and her were pretty tight before she died.”

“Another bullshit cover up?” Wayne murmured.

Eddie nodded and Wayne nodded back.

“A boy that young shouldn’t have seen as much death as he has,” Wayne murmured.

Eddie could only agree. Especially from white-bred middle America.

***

Pt 4|Pt 5|Pt 6|Pt 7|Pt 8|Pt 9|Pt 10|Pt 11|Pt 12

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @goodolefashionedloverboi @messrs-weasley @maya-custodios-dionach @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @itsall-taken @bookbinderbitch @redfreckledwolf @littlewildflowerkitten @vecnuthy @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @gutterflower77 @genderless-spoon @hel-spawn

[liquidluckandstuff]

Harry, Ron, blanket

Drabble Prompt

Harry knew Ron hated his hand-me-downs. He never really said it, but he was embarrassed whenever he had to wear something that seemed old or hand made. Harry knew that he wished that he could have newer things, but was never able to afford it. He often made excuses to trade his newer clothes with Ron so that he wouldn’t feel so bad. Harry didn’t mind, he liked knowing his things had a story behind them. 

He had so few things in his life that were made with love. 

So when he went to his friend's house for the first time, and saw a torn up blanket that was far more torn and old looking than anything else he owned, Harry seemed surprised. Especially when Ron kept it safe on his bed and seemed extremely attached to it. 

“Oh,” Ron blushed when Harry finally asked about it. “It’s uh, my baby blanket. My mom made it for me when I was little.”

Harry nodded as if he understood. “Oh, but why do you still have it?” 

“Well, it’s special. Some people have teddy bears, some people have blankets. It’s something special you usually keep from when you were little,” Ron explained. 

Harry felt a strong feeling in his chest like someone jumping up and down. “Oh, I don’t have anything like that.”

“Really? Why not?” 

Harry stared at his best friend like he had grown two heads. “Ron, my parents are dead.”

“Well yeah, but they must have already had something for you. A blanket or a toy or something.”

“I wouldn’t know. I don’t even know where I used to live, and it’s not like my aunt would tell me anything. I guess the closest thing I have is my invisibility cloak but I’m not about to sleep with it,” Harry shrugged and turned away. 

Ron rarely cried, but something in Harry’s words hurt him. He had to turn away to wipe his tears before he turned back to his best friend with a strained smile. “Come on, let’s go outside.” 

Hours later, after everyone else had gone to bed, Ron was laying down with his precious blanket wide awake. What Harry said was bothering him. Ron knew he took his family for granted sometimes, but at the moment he felt grateful for every moment he got to spend with them. 

He knew Harry would give anything to have what he had, and he knew there was something he could do to help him. 

Ron waited until he was certain Harry was asleep before he snuck out of his room to find his parents. Thankfully, they were both still awake though they looked ready to head up the stairs to their own bed. 

His mother looked at him with wide eyes and before she could get a chance to barrate him about being awake, Ron told his parents what Harry had told him. 

They listened to their son’s concern for his best friend with intent once they realized what he had to say. “I know it’s silly, but can’t you do something? Maybe you can make him a blanket or something mom. He doesn’t have anything.”

Molly already had tears in her eyes and moved to hug her youngest son. “Oh Ron, I’m so proud of the man you are growing up to be. We will see what we can do. Now off to bed.”

Nothing more was said for several more days, and Ron thought his parents forgot about it. 

He didn’t know what he was expecting to happen, but when a small package was handed to Harry at dinner one evening he already had a smile on his face. 

“Happy late birthday,” Mr. Weasley told Harry with a grin. “We had to go through a lot of trouble to get that but… well…”

“It was Ron’s idea,” Mrs. Weasley added. “We just went a step further.”

Harry looked confused at them, but carefully opened the package. Inside was a small red blanket with tiny snitches that flew around in patterns. “Why?” But Harry’s answer came when he brought the blanket closer to him and was able to smell it. He couldn’t remember anything besides an overpowering feeling of love. “Mum?”

“We were able to get it from your old home. Where you lived with your mum and dad. There isn’t much left of it, but -”

“Thank you,” Harry said with tears in his eyes. He raced over to hug each of them in turn, knowing his gratitude could never be expressed properly. 

When he reached Ron, Harry gave him the biggest hug of them all. 

[happilylovingchaos]

Last @lonestar-s5countdown Beginnings and Endings Week Post

I have a new work schedule now! And Lone Star is ending with season 5 real soon! That’s been fun getting used to… (/s) so I’ll post my fanfic/ music recs as one post tomorrow. Let’s see how much I can post w/o this becoming a complete image-less wall of stream-of-consciousness… but it will still be inevitable to everyone in the LS fandom who follows my handle and welcomed me. And if I haven’t said it yet, or enough, or sincerely in the last almost-year, thank you. Just thank you for your niceness, all your everything you’ve expressed, letting me be part of the fan group! I really really hope the end of the show doesn’t mean the end of this community, but whatever happens, it’s been a hella exhilarating, emotional, and lively experience.

(1) Which 911 Lone Star season premier is your favorite?

It’s a draw between seasons 2 and 4– I like the season premieres of 1 and 3 as much as everyone but holy hell I was not ready for the emotional twists in them to hit me the way they did. I am still in emotional recovery in both the good and bad ways. Both 2 and 4, until their respective cliffhangers, were quite light-hearted and self-contained with hints at the storylines to come, and those were easier for me to enjoy. Plus, Tommy, Gwyn and Iris (re-debut, in Iris’ case) had some colorful debuts! (I will always wish that Owen and Gwyn’s characters had a little more time together outside of the wit/ playfulness/ vitriol, and a couple more scenes with TK without their son always needing to be middle-man. But Rob, Lisa and Ronen played off of each other so well!) Gina’s portrayal of Tommy was just magnetically charismatic even without Michelle there— ‘Nuff said. And while I had issues with Iris’ bluntness (especially since it sorta re-opened some of TK’s emotional wounds), I could relate to being on both sides of a conversation in a similar situation to her— seeming hard to read/ confusing to most everyone around her (sometimes even with trusted family/ friends), and being confused/ offended by the delivery of what we convey.

(2) Which character do you think had the best introduction or first scene in the show?

I’m gonna say… it’s a toss-up between Judd and Grace for their natural first integration into the story and the first successful show>tell moment about them (specially Judd) in the series, Marjan (social media firefighter Muslim badass, in a description), and Mateo (for his own intro as unassuming but more than capable— Julian nails the portrayal of this character archetype in LS and The Long Game). Confusingly honorable mention goes to Michelle in hindsight, though? To me, she’s okay as a character, but I do understand where some fans were put off by her personality/ Liv’s portrayal.

(3) What is your favorite moment of 1x01?

Judd officially starting his end of the friendship with Owen by strong-arming him into accepting a chocolate chip cookie— you try saying no to a big Texan guy played by Jim Parrack and a mom and daughter holding a platter of chocolate chip cookies. Really, it’s tricky and you will probably get on their respective neutral if not shit lists. And Lil Nas X’s “Old Town Road” was quite a bop to end on! (Though, how did people find that wild? Just a little confused.)

(4) How did you first start watching Lone Star and how did you find out about it?

My aunt showed my mom and me the first parts of season 3– I saw… looking back on it, I’m a bit fuzzy on details but sometime in 2022 (def not consecutive days tho), I think I saw part of 3x04, then 3x07, and all of 3x08. And that last episode made me sob, I’m not ashamed to admit it now or in my grief week post. (My mom, grandma, uncle and aunt were watching it with me at dinner and were very confused about why I was crying.) Then I saw the last 3 eps, and it got me curious/hooked, so I went into season 4 kinda blind. Then I downloaded Hulu to catch up on the series proper, and the rest is rewatch history.

(5) What is one wish you have for the season 5 premiere?

Mostly that the overall narratives don’t feel too rushed or forced should there be a timeskip? I hate that Fox couldn’t get the show renewed… but on a lighter note? I’d like a solid explanation/ in-character reason for Grace’s absence that IS NOT a character death, a breakup, or anything relating to misblaming Wyatt.

Open tag to everyone as well!

[navree]

Happy weekend!

I wanted to ask what you make of Otto comparing Alicent to his wife. I definitely see the manipulation behind it, especially knowing that Alicent was close to her mother given that’s one of the main reasons she goes and prays at the sept.

But there’s also something about Otto standing up and staring Daemon down when he brings up his deceased wife and something about how he compares Alicent to her mother when she’s standing up to him at certain points.

And now that I think about, maybe this adds a bit more bite to Rhaenyra lying on her mother’s grave. At that point both Rhaenyra and Otto have used her mother to manipulate her.

Thank you, I hope you enjoy your weekend!

Thanks for the well wishes anon! Weekend's gonna be busy cuz I've got transfer application deadlines coming up and that's always A Lot to do, but I hope your's is more relaxing than mine!

I do definitely see it as a manipulation tactic, a lot of what Otto does is manipulation cuz he just appears to be a manipulative dude (honestly, no shade on him for that I appreciate it), but I do think it was something primarily driven by emotion. We don't know a whole lot about Otto as a person, his thoughts and feelings and emotions, but what we do know for certainty is that he dearly loves his wife and his children. The bit where Daemon brings up his wife is a clear example of this, because Otto in general is a pretty even keeled person (we later see him responding measuredly to Gwayne getting injured and being a reassuring figure for Alicent in that) but this one comment gets a rise out of him and he's clearly fighting the urge to absolutely deck Daemon. He, like Alicent, is very affected by this loss, and there can even be an insinuation that he never fully recovered from it, as he never remarried even though over twenty years passed and there was likely some expectation that such a high profile nobleman would remarry even though he already had sons.

When it comes to why he said that to Alicent, I see it as twofold. One, Otto and Alicent have this dynamic by the time this line is said that's almost that of a wife and husband than that of a father and daughter. I think it was @b-rainlet who pointed out that they're the ones who kinda slot into the role of "mom and dad" for Alicent's kids at times (when Criston's not fulfilling his "I'm not the stepdad I'm the dad who stepped up" obligations), and the way that they interact with each other in episode 7 and episode 9 almost reads as partners than as a man and his child. So when Alicent isn't reacting subserviently to him, as a Westerosi daughter should, but openly talking back to him and standing up for her kids, he likely does think a lot of his wife, of the role she played in his life when she was alive and likely any talking back she did regarding their own children. There's also the fact that Alicent might be very much like her mother, in both personality and looks, sometimes kids take a lot more after one parent than the other (case in point, I am much more like my dad in temperament and I'm a dead ringer for my paternal great aunt in looks and I clearly got nearly everything genetically from my dad's side of the family), and Alicent might be approaching the age her mother was when she died. And I think he remarked on it, almost in spite of himself, because of point two: he was feeling emotional.

Otto loved his wife. And we also know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that Otto loves Alicent. He's hurt her, he's put her in bad situations and he hasn't always done right by her, but he loves her. He understands her emotional needs and her psychological issues like her anxiety and he does, in his own way, do his best to try and alleviate them (like that reassurance at the joust and honestly, that scene between him and Alicent in ep 2 always read more to me like Otto is just sad his daughter feels the need to self harm than anything else), and even beyond his ambition, a huge driving force for his wanting Aegon on the throne is because he is genuinely worried for Alicent's future. I don't remember what exactly the wording was, but Rhys said that part of the conversation Alicent and Otto have in episode 5 is motivated by the fact that Otto loves her and is scared for her future. Which makes sense, he and Alicent are close, and they're both clearly strongly affected by the death of his wife/her mom. And with all that, we need to remember that Otto's line to Alicent about her mother comes on the heels of Alicent pulling away from him, Alicent saying that their hearts were never one. Otto is a widower, and a father who is right now losing his daughter (due to the consequences of his own choices, yes, but that's still what's happening). And in that moment, I think he was just overcome with emotion, not just at how alike Alicent might be to her mother and what their relationship is, but also the fact that he feels he's lost them both.

(I know there's a more incestuous reading, given the shifting in the dynamics between him and Alicent and also that this show in general is open to a LOT of incestuous readings, but I have a mild headache right now and don't have the cognitive ability to go into that in too much detail other than to say that I see it and I do find it an interesting read.)

It likely does add some bite to Rhaenyra's whole "I swear to you on the memory of my mother" thing, but whereas Rhaenyra was out and out lying and using Alicent's feelings on dead parents as express manipulation to get an outcome she wants, Otto's just trying to control the situation and try to turn it around in his favor, which might be more forgivable in Alicent's head, especially since a lot more time has passed since her mother's passing at this point. And it's also possible that the situation itself will be forgivable because of following events. Alicent's about to go through a huge trauma, she's going to be physically attacked and threatened with further violence in her own room, she's going to watch a close companion (the bedmade Blood and Cheese strangled to make sure to tie up all loose ends) and her own grandson die in front of her eyes, and of course have to deal with the psychological ramifications of the way it happened and how it affected Helaena, as well as having to be a support system to Aegon and the other two kids as well (the book is explicit that Maelor was basically given over to Alicent's care entirely after that night because of Helaena's mental state). And when you go through something like, it doesn't matter how old you are, sometimes you just need your parent to be with you and support you and help you and comfort you.

[maganne-bonete]

I think this might be the most stressful birthday week by far and it's only Tuesday.

I've been aware that my grandfather had dementia maybe weeks or more than a month ago but the thought of it has been troubling me lately.

Recently my bitch of an aunt went to my grandfather's house and ended up arguing with my cousin who's living there. She pulled out a phone to record him and threatened to send the police at him for idk what reason. My sibling and I had to question on what grounds exactly, and my mom even said that she really doesn't have any. My dad questioned my grandfather abt it but since his memory's been deteriorating, he doesn't even know who she was anymore.

But it pisses me off on the fact of how much many of my relatives were so shitty to my grandfather and cousin to begin with. Not that I have full context nor are they shitty towards them 24/7, but my mom jokes that my dad becomes an only child everynight just to take care of my grandpa, despite all our relatives living much closer and my dad being the 7th son of my grandfather. My cousin couldn't take care of him anymore since he started being hostile towards him because of his condition. So it really isn't like I could have a good view on the situation either.

And my cousin, who's an orphan and couldn't afford his own house, constantly gets berated by my aunts growing up and barely ever supported him. It mostly had to be my parents even who made sure he finished highschool and got a degree. My parents even suggested the idea of letting him live with us if he ever get's kicked from there by my other aunt who moved into the house cause of some tradition. Traditionally in our province the youngest kid gets to inherit the parent's house once the time comes but my grandfather is literally still alive. It puts a bad taste in my mouth. (Same aunt never invited my mom or my dad's side of the family to her wedding either)

But it's been also really troubling me how my grandfather's been lately. He even thinks my dad's his grandson rather than his actual son these days. Like, I feel like I haven't spent enough time with him at all and now he's slowly forgetting everything. And as much as how I've been bitching abt my relatives I don't think I'm any better either.

Maybe it's because I'm sad that he probably doesn't remember the times I've been delivering food for him from our house. Or the times he's driven the jeepney just to bring me and my cousins back and forth to school. He was still okay earlier this year when we celebrated his birthday but so much has already happened.

There's this sense of grief I've been feeling it seems. Forgetting is a fate worse than dying, and it makes me wished that I've asked more abt his life straight from his mouth. It's like I allowed him to die this way to begin with.

Like, I'm not an idiot. I, of all people should've tried asking him, writing abt him, recording his stories. He was a boy during the world war and he even worked out of country. There's probably a lot I didn't know that I could only now hear from my father instead. And I just allowed him to die like this even if I knew I should've done better. I should know because history has always been my passion and now, and especially one day, I would pay the price for my laziness and inaction.

There may only be my mother's mother left. She's in Manila right now and even she doesn't have forever. I need to make the right questions. Ask about the times she's lived. Even she was a child during the world wars. Their house in Bikol got bombed directly the moment they left the building. That story still horrifies me and keeps me up sometimes. They could've died there.

Idk, there's just so much I also need to do but this feeling I've been having, this dread, has been eating me up.

[mxchellesworld]

Gloria

Spencer Reid x Latina!Reader

request; Spencer and a reader who is bilingual

synopsis; Spencer turns 30 and spends the day with his favorite people

warnings; just fluff

*I added translations for a few things at the end

a/n; fuck accent marks, all my homies hate accent marks>:( lol but really, i did this in spanish since i speak it and thought it would be cute - i am very happy i got this request! as always enjoy

***

Spencer was proud of his multi linguistic skills, he had worked hard to be able to communicate with others in different languages. However when he wasn’t using his skills in a case or for research, his language skills were put to great use in watching his Russian films and trying to impress you.

While yes you had been together and married for nearing 6 years, it was always his main goal. Even when you first started to get to know one another and he met your parents he whipped out formal spanish greeting, with Elle’s help of course, which immediately had your mother swooning. Papa took some getting used to but now Spencer was his son at heart.

When you found out you were pregnant with your little girl he made sure to get books in spanish as well. According to him the novelas you watched weren’t gonna do much to help but give her more of your sass.

But when she came into the world he was more than overjoyed hearing your cooing over her. The way her big brown eyes lit up hearing your voice in the mornings.

“Donde esta mi princessa hermosa,” you said switching off the sound machine in the nursery. Instantly you were met with the sound of tiny giggles immersing from the swaddle of yellow fluffy blankets in her crib.

Another thing Spencer told you was that talking to babies was key in helping develop their speaking and understanding skills. Of course there was a percentage to accompany the fact but you got the just of it.

“Vamos a despertar a papa,” you said lifting her up and running your fingers through the steady growing curls on the top of her head.

She instantly perked up at the mention of her dad. Gummy smile spread across her chubby cheeks.

“Es su cumpleaños hoy. Creo que tu eres el mejor regalo que le pudia ver dado,” you finished by rubbing your nose onto hers. She shrieked in laughter, her tiny hands grabbing onto your hair.

After giving her diaper a quick change and dressing her up in her favorite onesie which read ‘daddy’s genius’, of course gifted by the best god mother Penelope Garcia, you walked over to your bedroom.

She clung onto your earrings as you patted down the hall trying to make minimal noise and wake up Spencer. You opened the door to see him still sound asleep having come back from a case late at night.

He was laying on his back, head tilted to the side with one hand under the pillow and the other on his stomach. You watched the rise and fall of his steady breathe in the Halloween t-shirt he slept in.

You smiled at the hitch in Gloria’s breath seeing her daddy first thing in the morning. The way she wiggled her body in your arms just dying to see her favorite person.

You straddled his waist trying to keep your weight on your knees to not wake him up. You then placed Gloria on his chest and let her go to town. Her sloppy kisses on his cheeks woke him from his slumber.

He slowly opened his eyes and let the smile spread across his face, “Oh wow what a way to wake up,” he let out a giggle.

Spencer sat up and held her close to his face, peppering kisses all over her rosy cheeks.

“We wanted to give the best father in the world an early birthday gift. Huh G,” you said calling for the little girl.

She babbled away in agreement making both you and Spencer share a laugh. You got off from his lap and snuggled into his arms.

“Well gracias Gloria,” he said bopping her nose, “I appreciate the wake up.”

You pressed a kiss to his cheek and watched as the two interacted before getting up to make breakfast.

You left them in bed and went to the kitchen whipping up some pancakes and a bottle for Gloria. When things were finishing up you heard Spencer’s steps coming down the hall.

He sat her in the high chair next to the table and wrapped his arms around your waist as you plated the food.

“Thank you for the best birthday gift I could ever ask for. I love you so much Y/n, you guys make me the happiest man on earth.”

You turned and met him with a sweet kiss, “Love you so much more mi amore. You deserve every bit of happiness Spence.”

Your moment was brought to an end by tiny hands banging on the plastic tray of her high chair. You both shared a look of understanding before you sat in the chair next to Gloria’s.

Spencer sat across from you while the three of you shared breakfast together. Gloria’s attitude was quickly changed by the cut up pieces of pancake you let her munch on.

By the time you had finished breakfast she was ready to be bathed and have some playtime before her midday nap if she was to endure the fabulous party hosted by none other than Papa Rossi.

“I’ll clean up here, you give her a bath and get her ready,” you said taking Spencer’s plate.

“You cooked I can clean this up no problem,” he tried to argue.

“No no you guys have your daddy daughter time. Then you can read her a story before her nap,” you said nodding.

He smiled at you then picked her out of the high chair and leaned down to press a kiss to your cheek. You could hear him cooing and talking to her as they made their way down the hall.

_

By 2pm you were getting ready to head to Dave’s house or Uncle Dave as he’s been more recently known. He agreed to host Spencer a little birthday party which consisted of the team and their kids.

After getting gloria dressed she was still fast asleep in her car seat and the ride to Dave’s was smooth with small talk and quiet music on the radio.

Spencer drove with his hand interlocked with yours in the middle, randomly pressing kisses to it during red lights.

“Mama y Papa called to wish you a happy birthday. It was when you were bathing G but they told me to relay the message,” you said playing with the scarf around his neck.

You could see the small blush creep on his face. Any mention of your parents thinking and caring for him hit really hard within him. They knew of his past and did their best to have him know he was truly a part of your family.

“I’ll make sure to call them tomorrow and say thank you. Maybe we can visit them soon, I know they miss Gloria and I really miss your mom’s cooking,” he said with a smile.

Arriving at David’s you were met with the door being ripped open by all the kids of the BAU. The boys were more than happy to wish their Uncle Spence a happy birthday and greet their little girl.

Since she was the only girl of the bunch they had sworn to protect her the best they could. Even if it wasn’t much now, when she got older they would definitely be her playground body guards.

Penelope and Derek then let you guys in and attacked you both in the biggest hugs imaginable.

“Oh hot mama I’ve missed you so much,” Garcia said swaying you back and forth.

“I’ve missed you more Garcia. We should round the girls up and get brunch sometime,” you said with a quirk in your lip.

She instantly lit up and grabbed your hand to take you to the rest of the BAU ladies. You looked back to see Spencer and Morgan laughing as they cooed over Gloria who was now waking up for her godfather.

The rest of the night went down smoothly with Gloria being passed around like a hot potato. Though she never minded, loving the attention from all her aunts and uncles.She was quite the stunner. Even getting Hotch to break character and indulge her in a wholesome game of pickaboo. 

A few games were played and stories were told but it was time to cut the cake before it reached anyone’s bedtime. 

You sat around Rossi’s yard, the candles reading 30 glowed under the October sky. You all sang and held smiles on your face as Spencer blew out his candles. Gloria bouncing on his lap happily around all the commotion. 

While he’d never admit it, you knew he actually didn’t wish for anything. Everything he could ask for was surrounding him at that very moment and he was more than content with the love of his favorite people.

translations

“Donde esta mi princessa hermosa,” - “Where is my pretty princess”

“Vamos a despertar a papa,” - “Lets go wake up dad”

“Es su cumpleaños hoy. Creo que tu eres el mejor regalo que le pudia ver dado,” - “It’s his birthday today. I think you are the best gift I could have ever given him”

[stopbeingrude]

Hi guys. Happy Gruvia/ Greige day. I wish all of you wonderful time.

That's gonna be the first one shot , i have ever published here, feedback is welcome. I hope It's not that bad and you'll somehow like it lmao.

,,I think I would rather have a plushie as a Christmas gift…., but I guess I shouldn't be too picky."

-Dad? - called 6-year-old Greige, on one December afternoon, when both him and his father were decorating a christmas-tree in the living room . December 24th was slowly approaching. It was Greige's favorite time of the year , because he was able to spend Christmas with all of his family, including all of his uncles , aunts and friends. Not forgetting about grandpa Makarov . Even Uncle Gildards would show up, bringing something for the kids. -I was wondering what would happen if Santa's reindeer suddenly wanted to pee while flying?- asked seriously little boy. No one wanted to tell him that. When he asked big bro Romeo , he just started laughing and then he called him silly. "How could he do that?" -thought heartbroken Greige after. -Heh , where did that come from? ... you know ... they'd have to stop somewhere by, right? Daddy doesn't know much about it- said Gray, trying to keep himself from laughing. He couldn't laugh, he knew it would offend his little angel. Their son hated when someone made fun of him . After all, he was already a big boy, and everyone knows that such must be taken seriously. - So maybe Mommy knows? I will go and ask her,- said the little boy, putting down Christmas decorations . Speaking of mom, he had recently noticed his mother's strange behavior. She had been getting tired very easily lately, she often took naps. He also noticed that she spent an enormous amount of time sewing ,mostly clothing. Well.. he was aware of his mom's hobby, but usually it was limited to sewing plushies, sometimes socks or fixing their clothes. - You know, I don't think mommy knows more than me - said Gray after hanging the last Christmas-ball. - Besides, you know that mommy is sleeping now, right? She hasn't been feeling well lately, so she mustn't be disturbed. Something was off, even Daddy acts differently- thought little Fullbuster Now, that got the boy worried. - Is something wrong with Mommy? - asked slowly Greige He loved Mommy and Daddy most in the world and the very thought of them suffering hurt him deeply. "No, I won't start crying…Boys my age don't do that..." He had often been told that he should stop being such a crybaby (mostly by Yajeh or Nasha . Shutora would never. She was always trying her best to cheer him up,while reminding her twin and little Dragneel that if they won't stop with this stupid teasing, she would make sure both of them would regret it later). Unfortunately Greige could not help it. Whenever someone was hurt or something went wrong, he would usually cry. Turns out he inherited his mom's sensitivity... "Mommy…..something was definitely wrong with her.." The thought of something happening to his dear Mom filled him with great terror once again. He started shaking What if she's ill, or even worse..she's gonna….. "No , no , that's not possible..." - he shook his little head full of dark , curly hair. - I'm overreacting, just like Yajeh told me - No, no.. don't worry, Greige, Mommy's fine, it's nothing serious,"-Gray said quickly, trying his best to calm his son down, giving him a hug and then kissing him on forehead He knew exactly what was going on with his beloved, in fact, when an excited Juvia came back home one evening and informed him of the pregnancy, he was overjoyed. Soon he will be holding his son or daughter in his arms. Then it hit him. The baby might turn out to be a girl, and Gray had no idea how to take care of girls...Dear God….Ok ,ok.. he still has plenty of time to learn. He can always ask Gajeel about it..yes Gajeel or Alzack...even Elfman ( he would never ask Natsu, even if he's life depended on it, that would be too humiliating for him). Wait...it wasn't his top priority right now. After all, he needs to inform his son about the news first. Neither of them was quite sure how to do it. They remembered very well the situation from a few months ago when the Redfox twins got into an argument. Horrified, Greige stated that being an only child is not that bad, since having siblings meant constant war. Although being honest , Greige never

directly told them that he hates the idea of having a sibling . Considering how much time he spent with Nasha and Elfman and Ever's daughter Ember, or year-old Reiki Fernandes, it would seem that he's perfect for the big brother role. Besides, they can't hide it forever, sooner or later he would notice Juvia's belly. However, the biggest concern for Fullbuster was the fact that such news could lead to a longer conversation, which again could lead to uncomfortable questions that Gray was not ready to answer. He is not going to tell his son about the birds and the bees. No, no, hell no… None of them are ready for this! "Come on Gray, what's wrong with you, you just have to tell him. You've been in worse situations….after all, you've fought with all sorts of criminals, weirdos and monsters ,compared to what you've been through, it's nothing''- thought the ice mage But how to start such a conversation? How about …. -Hey Greige, have you written a letter to Santa yet? "Yes, just ask him what he wants for Christmas and make a few innocent suggestions." -Oh no i didn't, thank you for reminding me Dad. - And tell Daddy, what would you like to ask Santa for? The boy was silent for a moment, most likely to think about the answer, but after a while he called out in a loud voice. -I'D LIKE TO ASK HIM FOR PEACE IN THE WORLD AND FOR EVERY POOR PERSON TO GET A BETTER LIFE AND FOR EVERYONE TO BE HAPPY!..... It would also be nice to get a new plushie……but it's not as important. Do you think Santa can do that?-he asked hopefully Gray stood there for a moment, stunned. His baby was truly an angel...wishing happiness upon the entire world, it nearly made him tear up…. but no... he needed to explain to his son that he should wish for something more....... attainable. -Ooh... really..that's....very nice of you, but...I think that such a wish...yym...takes a bit of time and Santa w-won't be able to do it…., why don't you ask him for….. for example a toy like a teddy bear, figurines....or new books or something else...I don't know.......sibling?... Greige looked at him, like he had just proposed to him to take a walk on the rooftop. Where did that come from? What is dad talking about? S-sibling...?? -Sibling? You mean like a little brother or sister? A baby?- asked the little boy loudly. -Yes, that's exactly what I meant, but well you'll need to wait for a while, because it takes time for a baby to….be ready.- mumbled out Gray - So that's not really a Christmas present- stated boy still visibly shocked -...Well y-yes , but... -But didn't you say mommy has been feeling unwell lately?...If we had a baby, wouldn't it be tiring for her?....Besides, do you think we need a new baby? - asked seriously Greige Why would they need a baby? They were living happily in this house , just three of them. It's not like he dislikes babies , they're cute and all…..but it's just simply weird.. -Well... I wouldn't say it's necessary , but it would be nice to have one at home.. don't you think?....- asked his dad Maybe? -And don't worry about mommy, I am sure that she will be so happy with the new baby , it will make her feel better.- stated Gray , this time with a smile -Hello my darlings- Juvia's voice said suddenly They both turned their heads toward the bedroom's door, finding Juvia's tired but smiling face there. Greige quickly got up and ran toward his mother. -Mommy, are you feeling better? Do you need anything?- said the little boy, hugging her legs. Juvia kissed her son's cheek. -Hi sweetheart, Mommy is fine- she answered while taking a seat next to her precious Gray, giving him a quick kiss on the lips. -Did I hear you talking about babies?- Juvia asked, pretending to be surprised, while giving Gray a tiny smirk. - Daddy said it would be nice to have a baby and that it would make you feel better... - he began. - I don't think a baby is necessary, because it would be a little strange that there will be more of us in the house, but if you really wish for one ,then that's fine with me. -Really? Mommy's glad to hear that.-

replied a happy Juvia , giving her husband a big smile. Gray gave her the same smile, but just when he thought everything had been taken care of, there came the soft voice of his baby boy. - Mommy....Daddy...but you won't love the baby more than me, will you? - asked Greige, with his head lowered and tears in his dark eyes. Both Gray and Juvia stood there very surprised, neither of them had even thought of such a scenario. -Greige, what makes you think that?- asked older Fullbuster. -Sunshine, no...- Juvia hugged her son quickly- You mustn't think like that, we would never stop loving you. Remember darling, parents love all their children equally. - You know, its true that we'll have to spend a lot of time taking care of your brother or sister, but you have to remember that they won't be able to do anything on their own. You were like that when you were born too.- said Gray - I'm sorry. I won't do that again- said Greige seriously. -Do you think I offended the baby? I don't want the baby to think I don't want him or her,- said the terrified boy .What if the baby will always remember this and he will never be forgiven. - Don't worry, honey, I'm sure she won't mind,- said the water mage, stroking her belly. -She?-Gray thought. Turns out his wife wasn't telling him everything... -Wait a minute! -said suddenly Greige after a moment of silence -The baby will be in the tummy, just like Reiki was in Auntie Erza's , right? - Well baby is already there, but your right - answered Gray -Daddy? - Yes buddy ? - How did it get there? Shit. -Yyyy… Horrified, Gray turned his gaze to his wife, silently pleading for help. -You know what, angel? It's almost 8pm, I think it's time for you to take a bath, okay?- proposed Juvia, saving her husband from very uncomfortable talk. - Ok Mommy. Will you read me a bedtime story after we finish? - Of course They were already moving towards the bathroom when Juvia quickly turned towards her husband, gave him a kiss on the cheek and whispered : -You're welcome. Has Gray already mentioned how much he loved his wife?

Bonus!:

( ok I swear it was funnier in my head...Once again Happy Gruvia day !!!)

[startanewdream]

Hey, I just wanted to say that I love your Jily Live AU. I hope you can write more of them. Have you written anything about James and Lily finding out about Snape being Harry’s teacher and his shenanigans? Or about them talking to Harry about Peter? Or even Harry asking his mom what it was like to be a muggleborn? I think those could be good.

Hi! I'm so glad you are enjoying it, it's such a nice world to think of!

I think Snape's relationship with James and Lily is difficult in any universe, and it hurts me to think how a living James would deal with Peter's betrayal (though this is a story I hope to write sometime). So here is a short drabble of Harry and Lily discussing her being a Muggleborn. Hope you enjoy it :)

Warning for mildly swearing, I think.

_________________________

Her hand is writing nonstop, registering her latest discovery, and Lily is so immersed in that feeling of uncovering secrets of potions - new combinations for old ingredients, the closest to science she can find in magic - that she doesn’t immediately register Harry calling her.

‘Mum? Mum!’

‘No chocolate before dinner, Harry, you know the rules’. she says vaguely, still concentrating on writing down the effects of mixing moonstone and wolfsbane.

‘No, I don’t…. there is chocolate?’

‘What?’

‘I want to talk to you’.

‘I’m working now, Harry, you know when mum is busy you have to -’

‘What is a mudblood?’

That makes her lose control of her hand, making a line with the quill across the parchment. Her hand trembles as she carefully rests the quill, raising her eyes to find a pair of green eyes that are the exact tone of hers.

Harry’s voice is nothing like Snape’s, but she can somehow hear the echo of her former best friend calling her mudblood a lifetime ago.

‘Where did you hear that word, Harry?’, she asks quietly, but Harry seems to know something is wrong because he recoils, unsure.

‘Is that an adult word? I am sorry, I didn’t know -’

‘That’s okay, Harry, I am not mad at you’, Lily assures, forcing herself to smile at her son. She offers her arms. ‘Come here’.

Harry doesn’t hesitate before rounding her desk and approaching her. Lily puts him on her lap, caressing softly his hair, making it messy in the way Harry likes, to copy his father’s style.

He is looking at her curiously, and Lily wishes she didn’t have to explain the hard reality of the world - of her world - to her six-years-old son.

‘Who said that word, Harry?’, Lily asks again, softly.

‘I heard today when dad and me -’

‘“Dad and I”, Harry’, she corrects him with a gentle smile. Harry blushes.

‘Yes, when we were at Diagon Alley today. Someone told Dad was a disgrace for marrying a mud… that word’.

Lily bits her lips. James hadn’t said anything to her, even though he had returned home from their trip with a closed face. She should have known something had happened -

‘Dad was going to fight the man’, Harry whispers, looking as if he is sharing a secret. ‘But Uncle Moony didn’t let him. He said - he said Dad was just going to get in trouble’.

‘Remus is always the most reasonable’.

‘I don’t want Dad to be in trouble!’

‘He is not, Harry, it’s fine’, Lily says reassuringly. ‘Your father was just upset. That man said a very bad word’.

‘But you are not a disgrace… you are mum. Dad is happy marrying you!’

‘Of course he is. It’s just… Some people don’t think he should have married me’. When Harry looks mutinous, she touches the point of his nose, making him blink. ‘Let me explain to you, ok?’

She waits until Harry nods silently, his eyes big and confused and so pure that Lily hates more than ever all the prejudice there is in the wizarding world.

‘Do you know how I told you about my parents? Your grandparents?’. He nods once more. ‘They were Muggles’.

Harry furrows his brows, concentrating.

‘They always took you and Aunt Petunia to the zoo’, he says slowly, remembering one of her stories. Lily smiles softly. ‘And they bought you ice cream at the exit’.

‘I always chose chocolate ice cream’.

‘Like me! It’s my favourite’.

‘Yes’, she agrees, tickling him, making Harry giggle. She waits until he stops laughing, then she sighs. ‘Well, because they were Muggles, I’m what wizards called muggleborn. That just means my parents weren’t magical folks’.

‘Does it make a difference, being a muggleborn?’

She can hear the echo of herself making that same question years ago. Severus had told her it didn’t. He had lied.

It wouldn’t be his last lie.

‘It shouldn’t make a difference, Harry’, she says slowly. ‘Every witch and wizard is capable of doing magic, and magic doesn’t care about your surname or your blood or who your parents are. But…’

‘But?’

‘But some people don’t see it like that. Some people think they are better than others because all their past relatives were magic too’. Lily swallows hard and looks at Harry deeply in his eyes. ‘They are wrong, Harry. No one is better than anyone. Every witch and wizard should be equal’.

‘There are people that don’t like you?’, Harry asks in a whisper.

Lily closes her eyes briefly and she can remember the first time she understood the snickers, the contempt in other people’s eyes when they looked at her.

‘Yes’, she admits. ‘Do you remember when we told you about the war? About the man that gave you that scar?’

Harry acquiesces quietly, trembling slightly. Lily and James had told him only the basics of Voldemort, the bare minimum he needed to understand where his scar came from.

‘Well, one of the things he defended was that wizarding blood was different, that muggles were lesser than wizards. And that anyone who had muggle relatives, especially muggleborns like me, were worthless because of their relation with muggles'.

‘But you are a great witch!’, Harry cries indignantly. ‘You make all these spells and potions and -’

‘That’s the point, Harry’, she cuts him off gently. ‘I am as magical as your dad, as much as anyone. It doesn’t matter who my parents were, but that doesn’t mean I’m ashamed of them. I loved them very much and I’m glad to be muggleborn. It means I belong in both worlds. Like you’.

‘I am in two worlds too?’

‘Of course you are’, she assures him, smiling at her son. ‘And everyone is worth the same, magical or not, witch and wizard or any other creature. No one is better than anyone’.

Harry agrees with his head, looking as thoughtful as a six-years-old can be.

‘But those who are prejudiced use Mudblood as a slur for muggleborns like me’.

‘It’s a bad word’, says Harry solemnly.

‘Yes, it is’.

‘I won’t let anyone call you that’, Harry promises. ‘You or anyone else’.

Lily hugs him.

‘Just don’t get into trouble for it’, she asks. ‘Those people - those prejudiced people - are not worth it’.

‘The secret, Harry’, she hears someone saying from the door, and she turns to see James smirking there, ‘is that if no one knows it was you, you won't ever be in trouble’.

Lily raises her eyebrows, but doesn’t say anything.

‘Sirius just arrived. He is asking for his favourite godson’, James adds, and Harry lets out a happy cry.

‘Can I go, Mum?’, he says. She nods, and he kisses her on the cheek before jumping, running towards the door.

James just messes with his son’s hair as Harry passes through him, and he closes the door of her office.

'Did you just tell our son that he shouldn't get caught?', Lily asks, the corners of her mouth almost lifting up in a smile.

'Well, I wasn't going to say he shouldn't defend his mum', James ponders, sitting on her desk. There is a smile on his face that Lily can only describe as marauder.

'Why do I think you took your own advice?'

'Oh, Lily, you hurt me', he says playfully, tucking her hair behind her ear. 'What would you think I have anything to do with Travers' office being inundated for a week?'

'Who said anything about Travers?'

'Not me. In fact, the less I think about that wanker, the better'.

'Language, James', she teases, smiling despite herself. 'That's an adult word. What if Harry hears it?'

'Harry is pretty busy right now, since Sirius owned me a favour or two', he whispers, bending down to press his lips softly against her neck. 'How about we do some adult things?'

The door of her office stays closed for a very long time.

------------------------------------------

There is an expression on James' face when he returns home that Lily has long ago learnt to associate with a prank.

'What?', she asks, raising her eyebrows.

James grins.

'I had the most fascinating chat with Minerva today, when I dropped by to deliver her my recent articles'.

'Yeah?'

'She told me a curious tale. Apparently Lucius Malfoy's son's new broomstick had to be sent to repair because someone managed to dispel the cushioning charm'.

'How come?'

'No one knows… just as it happens, by pure coincidence, Harry asked me a week ago about the theory of dispelling charms'.

'What?!', Lily cries, just as James' smirk increases. 'Harry is supposed to behave, James, especially after that story with the flying car -'

'Apparently, the Malfoy boy called Hermione Granger a "Mudblood" one week ago', James adds, in a nonchalant voice.

Lily blinks.

'I see. I suppose no one discovered who tampered with the broomstick?', she asks, her voice as calm as his now.

James denies with his head.

'Too bad then', she replies, returning to her book with a smirk that she knows it’s just like the one on James’ face. 'I guess we will always wonder who did it'.

[buckleyirondad]

these little words (somehow they're changing us)

Christopher can make anybody smile, even when they feel like they can't.

Christopher Diaz Week, Day 7: ANYTHING CHRIS GOES + “I love you.”

Read on AO3 (This is a long one lol)

TW: For ‘Part 4: Harry’ there are mentions of a bully who teased Harry for having a gay dad. 

1: Bobby

Washing up, Bobby could turn his back on the team and couldn’t be asked a million questions about how he was feeling. At home, with Athena and May, they spoke to him with their gentlest voices, then at work, the team did the same, it was too much.

The anniversary of the fire was creeping up, the single worst day of Bobby’s life, that he wished he could lock in a box and throw to the bottom of a lake.

He knew that his family cared.

It was why Athena was up early to make him breakfast every morning, why Hen and Chimney let him win their Mario Kart tournament, why Eddie did the grocery run, and why Buck saved him the last cupcake from the bundle Taylor had dropped off to celebrate Buck and Eddie’s engagement.

Those gestures, Bobby didn’t mind, but it was the talking; the mindless head tilts and the usual, “How are you doing?”

There was no answer for that, unless he lied, nodding his head, and saying he was doing okay, but when he closed his eyes, he saw his kids laying across those white sheets.

Bobby celebrated – internally, of course - when Eddie asked if Christopher and Carla could stopover for lunch. He adored Christopher, and so did everybody else, it was impossible not to. So, while everybody was distracted by Christopher’s wonderous tales, Bobby could escape the constant questions and the worried glances.

Running his hand through the lukewarm water, Bobby turned off the faucet and turned, swinging open the dishwasher.

He skipped over to the table, gathering as many plates as he could with two hands.

Christopher grabbed his empty plastic cup and jumped onto his feet, “I’ll help!”

Bobby couldn’t help but smile, “Thank you.” He turned, starting to place the plates into the dishwasher, “Those cups can’t go in here, do you wanna put it in the sink for me?”

“Okay!” Christopher bounced over, tossing the cup into the water, “I’m very good at washing up.”

Bobby raised his eyebrows, “Yeah?”

Christopher lowered his voice, “Better than Buck.”

Bobby pressed a hand on his stomach, barking a laugh, “I bet you are.”

Buck couldn’t wash up, not without making a mess; Eddie couldn’t cook, even after many one-to-one lessons with Bobby. Together, it worked.

Christopher stood on his tiptoes, looking into the sink, “Do you want my help?”

“Sure,” Bobby held up his hands, “I’ll grab the other cups.”

Before he could, Christopher was hugging him, locking his arms firmly around Bobby’s middle.

Bobby knelt, folding his arms behind Christopher’s shoulders, letting the kid press his chin on his shoulder, “Hey,” Bobby hung his head back, “What was that for?”

“I don’t know,” Christopher lifted his shoulders with a shrug, “But I think you needed a hug.”

A warmth spread across Bobby’s chest as a grin gradually grew across his face, “I guess I did.”

Christopher patted his shoulder, “Love you, Bobby.”

Bobby lifted his hands, ruffling Christopher’s hair, “Love you too, kid.”

Standing to collect the cups together, Bobby searched the room for Eddie, he found him on the couch, grinning up at his fiancée who had laid his legs across Eddie’s lap, trapping him. Eddie locked eyes with Bobby, nodding slowly, with a knowing smile, he knew better than anyone that reassurance from Christopher was exactly what Bobby needed.

2: Maddie

Maddie understood that she couldn’t protect Jee-Yun from everything unless she planned to take helicopter parenting to the next most extreme level.

Jee-Yun was teething and despite knowing that her daughter would never remember the pain or the tears, it didn’t ease Maddie’s worry. She hated knowing that Jee-Yun was in pain, there was nothing she could do to soothe her, aside from cradle her, and buy her toys to chew on to her heart’s content.

“I know, baby,” Maddie pressed a kiss to Jee-Yun’s temple, “It sucks, doesn’t it?” Her daughter hung her head, wailing as loud as she could, Maddie tried to shush her, “Daddy’s sleeping.”

“No, Daddy’s awake,” Chimney emerged from the bedroom, with a yawn, he rubbed his eyes with the backs of his fingers.

“Oh, Chim,” Maddie squeaked her empathy, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not her fault,” Chimney clapped his hands, taking Jee-Yun into his arms, “It’s a part of growing up.”

She sighed, “But you have to work tonight.”

“I’ve had five hours,” He shrugged as he patted Jee-Yun’s back, “That’s enough.”

Maddie pressed her hands on her hips, trying to conceal a yawn, but it didn’t go unnoticed by Chimney, who raised his eyebrows, tilting his head to his shoulder, she jabbed a finger in his direction, “Shut up.”

Chimney laughed, “I didn’t say anything,”

There was a knock at the door.

Maddie narrowed her eyes, considering she hadn’t buzzed anybody in, she reached for the handle, pulling open the door.

She was greeted by three familiar faces; Buck, Eddie, and Christopher.

“Aunt Maddie!” Christopher locked his arms around her legs, greeting her in his usual fashion.

“Hey, honey,” She tapped his back as she darted her eyes up to her brother, “What are you guys doing here?” She asked through a yawn, “I thought you were venue hunting.”

“We are,” Eddie shrugged, “But not until later.”

Christopher headed inside, wearing a grin as he stopped by Buck’s side.

“So, we’re here…” Buck moved inside, pressing a kiss to Maddie’s cheek, “To help.”

Maddie raised her eyebrows, “Help?”

Buck pressed his hands together, resting them under his chin, as he turned on his heel, “Consider this an intervention.”

Maddie stepped closer to Chimney, “An intervention?”

Buck tilted his ear to his shoulder, “You two need sleep.”

“Desperately,” Eddie added as he pushed the front door shut, pressing a hand to his son’s back.

Chimney scoffed a laugh, “We’re fine.”

Buck snorted, “Sure.”

Eddie crossed his arms, “Is that why you look like you’re about to fall over?”

Chimney exclaimed, “Hey!”

“Now, there’s my favorite niece,” Buck held out his arms, scooping Jee-Yun, with a smile, not phased by her sobs, “Oh, no.”

Maddie sighed, “You really don’t have to do this.”

“We want to,” Eddie assured her, “You two deserve some time.”

“I mean,” Chimney met her gaze, “It’s basically free babysitting, right?”

“Yeah…” Maddie nodded, “Um, are you sure?”

Buck smiled, “Get some rest.”

Going into the bedroom, Maddie and Chimney fell onto their bed, not even bothering with the covers, curling into one another.

She couldn’t work out when she fell asleep, but Maddie was suddenly woken up, by somebody prodding her arm.

“What?” She turned, meeting Chimney’s tired gaze, “What is it?”

He raised his head, “Can you hear that?”

She couldn’t hear anything, “No.”

“Exactly,” Chimney mused, “Jee-Yun’s not crying.”

Maddie needed to see this, she sat up, crawling out of the bed, cracking the door open, and leaning her head out.

Jee-Yun was laying in the crib, blabbering happily, her eyes on the ceiling.

Eddie and Buck were dancing around the kitchen, finishing the washing up, while gazing into each other’s eyes, like they always did.

Maddie’s eyes found Christopher, who was kneeling beside the crib, poking his fingers through the slates, letting Jee-Yun grip onto one of them with all her might.

Christopher grinned, fascinated by his cousin, he sang, “Hey.”

Jee-Yun spun her head, watching Christopher, squeezing his finger as she did, she giggled loudly, staring at him like he held all the answers to the universe.

Christopher lowered his voice, whispering, “Love you, Jee.”

Tears filled Maddie’s eyes as she smiled, turning back to Chimney.

Jumping back into her bed, she couldn’t drop her smile.

Her family was the best.

3: Denny

Denny skipped into his bedroom, placing Christopher’s bag on the end of his bed.

They were having a double sleepover; two nights with Christopher, while Eddie and Buck were out wedding planning, which meant they could play games all day and talk through the night.

Christopher was having Denny’s bed while Denny took the inflatable mattress that they’d blown up by the window and covered in a spare quilt.

Denny bent beside the toy box, opening the lid, and searching for his new Star Wars Lego set to take into the living room. He stopped when he noticed something buried at the bottom, under the scrabble box, he dug his hands inside, pulling out a pink horse plushie, “Oh.”

It was Nia’s.

All his happiness was gone, Denny climbed onto his bed, laying on his side, hugging her horse under his arm as he let out a long sigh.

The bedroom door creaked, and Christopher asked, “What’s wrong?”

Denny hummed before saying, “Nothing.”

Christopher climbed up onto the bed, lying next to him, patting Denny’s arm, “I miss Nia too.”

Denny lifted his head, looking at his friend.

“It’s okay to miss people,” Christopher told him, “I miss my mom sometimes, but she’s not coming back, but she was here,” He squeezed the plushie, “Dad says that the important thing.”

Denny couldn’t imagine losing one of his moms; Christopher was one of the strongest people that he knew because he never stopped smiling.

“Nia is with her mom,” Christopher said, “She’s happy but she probably misses you too.”

Denny nodded slowly.

“You might see her again one day,” Christopher smiled, “That would be fun.”

“Yeah, it would,” Denny reached over, pulling Christopher into a hug, squeezing his eyes shut.

Christopher tapped his back, “I’m not going anywhere, Denny.”

“I know.” Denny scrunched his nose, “Love you, Chris.”

“Love you too.”

4: Harry

Harry was unloading the dishwasher, ignoring the glances that his mom and Bobby were sending his way as they muttered between themselves.

He knew he was in trouble, his parents had made that very clear when they collected him from school and grounded him, being suspended from school for a week was a big deal, he understood that.

He couldn’t tell them the whole truth, he knew how extravagant his parents were when they were angry, especially his mom. If he told Bobby, it would reach the station, and then everybody would be mad; he could already picture Hen and Buck storming the school with his mom.

Harry would rather handle it, by himself, and not stress his family out, yet. It wasn’t long until Eddie and Buck’s wedding, he didn’t want to put a dent in that, because it definitely would.

“Harry,” Bobby leaned on the kitchen surface, “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” Harry closed the dishwasher, “I pushed Ben over; that’s all.”

“That’s all,” Athena muttered, shaking her head as she buried her hands in his pockets.

“We know you, Harry,” Bobby said, clearly being the ‘good cop,’ “You wouldn’t have just pushed him.”

Ben’s torments filled Harry’s head as he met his stepdad’s gaze.

Your dad’s got a boyfriend?

Harry shrugged, “It’s nothing, Bobby.”

That’s so gross.

Harry adored his family, that included David, and when Ben came for him, Harry saw red, pushing Ben to the ground; Ben had seen the engagement party pictures for Eddie and Buck on Harry’s Instagram, that added fuel to the fire, but Harry would defend his family until the end.

The doorbell rang.

Bobby hung his head, looking to Harry’s mom, “That will be the boys.”

Harry rolled his shoulders; he forgot that Buck, Eddie, and Christopher were visiting for dinner.

“Harry,” Athena said strictly, “Christopher’s gonna wanna play games with you, but no video games, you hear me?”

Harry nodded.

Athena put on a grin, skipped up the stairs, and opening the door, with a joyous, “Hey!”

“Sorry, we’re so early,” Buck said, “Christopher was very excited to see Harry.”

Harry stepped over with Bobby, looking up to the door, as his mom turned to face him, with a knowing glance.

“Well, Harry’s grounded,” She pressed a hand to her hip, “But if Christopher is okay with board games.”

“We love board games,” Eddie sang, “Don’t we, bud?”

Christopher jumped, “Yeah!”

“This way, Chris,” Harry nodded his head to the couch, pulling out the Scrabble and Monopoly boards from under the coffee table, as he sat down, leaning his back on the edge of the couch.

Bobby skipped into the kitchen, to prepare drinks, while the others sat at the dinner table, jumping right into talking about the wedding.

Harry was happy for the distraction while he played games with Christopher.

Christopher balanced his crutches on the floor before jumping down to see near Harry, he lowered his voice, leaning his head, “What happened?”

Harry lifted his hands, “I got grounded.”

Christopher muttered, “Why?”

“I pushed a kid over,” Harry told him as he got out the parts for Scrabble, laying the board across the table, “I don’t wanna talk about it.” The thing was, he did want to talk about it, he wanted everybody to know that he didn’t do it without a reason, but he couldn’t.

Christopher asked, “Was he a bully?”

Harry nodded, keeping his voice quiet, “Yeah.”

“Oh,” Christopher let go of a long breath, “Did he push you?”

“No,” Harry shook his head, “But—”

“He was mean?”

“Very.” Harry sighed, darting his eyes to his mom, who was caught up in her conversation, she wouldn’t be able to hear them, “Can I tell you what happened?”

“Yeah.”

“The kid, Ben, he was being mean,” Harry looked over at Buck and Eddie, before turning his face back to Christopher, “He said it was gross that my dad is gay.”

“That’s wrong!” Christopher cupped a hand over his mouth, shushing himself, “He can’t say that—”

“I know.”

Christopher held out his hands, “I would have pushed him over too.”

Eddie was on his feet, pacing over, “What did you say, Chris?”

Harry cursed their luck, he forgot that his parents could hear everything.

Christopher lied, “Nothing.”

“No…” Eddie shook his head slowly, “We all heard.”

Buck, like Bobby, seemed to take the role of ‘good cop’ so he stood back, crossing his arms, eyes locked onto the boys.

While Harry’s mom stepped over, stopping next to Eddie, the pair crossing their arms.

Christopher explained, “Harry pushed him because Ben was making fun of Michael for being gay.”

Harry sighed, slouching, as the adults were stunned into silence.

Harry’s mom met Eddie’s gaze, while Bobby clamped a hand on Buck’s shoulder.

“And—” Christopher breathed, “If somebody said that about you, I’d be mad.”

“Yeah, buddy, I know,” Eddie sighed gently, “Ben is wrong.”

“Harry,” Athena spoke softly, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t wanna hurt Dad or David.”

“Still, sweetheart…” Athena sighed, bending down to cup his cheek in her hand, “You have to tell us these things, so we can understand.”

“Okay, Mom.”

“And pushing him over, wasn’t the best move,” She scolded, “But I get it, next time, you come to me, or one of your teachers, okay?”

“Yeah,” Harry nodded, “I will.”

“We’ll talk to your school tomorrow,”

Standing up, Bobby stepped over, wrapping an arm behind her back, pressing a kiss to her cheek.

Harry turned, tugging Christopher into a hug, “Thank you,” He whispered into his ear.

Christopher frowned, “Why?”

“For helping.” Harry pulled back, “I didn’t know how to tell them.”

“Ben has to be told off,” Christopher told him, “And he will be.”

“Yeah,” Harry tapped his friend’s shoulder, “He will.”

Christopher reached out, grabbing the bag of letters for Scrabble, he looked up with a smile, “Love you, Harry.”

Harry grinned, happy to have a friend in Christopher, “Love you too, Chris.”

5: Buck

Sometimes Buck would wake up, panicked by memories of the tsunami. In a few short months, it would be the third anniversary of when the wave came crashing down, and he couldn’t understand where the time had gone.

Buck could feel the rush of the water; the pressure gathering him up and pushing him back, away from Christopher.

The ringing in his ears, his heart racing in his chest, and his arms thrashing through the cold avoiding debris as he swept past, Buck remembered it all.

He leaned back in the chair at the kitchen table, slowing his breathing as his eyes found the clock on the wall.

4:48 am.

He was surprised he hadn’t woken Eddie when he got out of bed, his fiancé wasn’t exactly a heavy sleep, and usually, with the slightest hint of unfamiliar movement, Eddie would be up on his feet before Buck could reassure him that he was only getting up to grab a glass of water.

It had been two hours since Buck had left the bedroom, taking his place in the kitchen, to sit with a cup of cocoa and stare at the wall, thoughts running through his head, at a mile a minute.

Eddie hadn’t been distributed when Buck slipped away, likely because they’d had a long shift at work, and when they made it home, Eddie had been out like a light.

Buck rubbed his hand down his face, wanting nothing more than for Eddie to gather him up in his arms, and tell him that everything was going to be okay.

He knew that if he knocked on the door and woke Eddie, then he would be exactly what he would get; Eddie didn’t show it, but he was a softy at heart.

As much as Buck wanted that, he couldn’t.

Buck? Wait, what are you doing here? Are you okay? Wait, where's Christopher?

Memories of that day, that moment when he thought he’d lost Christopher and had to tell Eddie, they weighed heavy, keeping him sitting in the chair.

Me and Christopher, we were...at the beach, and--um...and listen to me, okay?

Oh, he’d never shake the look in Eddie’s eyes.

I swear to you... okay, I tried...

Tears filled his eyes, he brushed them away, bracing his fingers together and planting them on the table, as he slowed his breathing.

Buck had been in love with Eddie for as long as he could remember, but when that day, he thought any potential relationship was buried.

Eddie and Christopher were two of the most important people in Buck’s life, two who pulled him to shore while he was sinking fast. He let them down that day, let Christopher slip through his fingers, but his soon-to-be stepson was adamant that Buck was a hero, but he didn’t feel like one.

Shortly after the whole lawsuit debacle, Eddie caught Buck off-guard, asking him out on a date, and explained that he was done wasting time that they didn’t have.

Buck was sure that he’d never been happier, than in that very moment, and then a year later, Eddie asked him to marry him, that day quickly took the top spot.

Buck fiddled with his engagement ring, leaning his head against his hand as he shuddered, feeling like he needed to wade through water before he could make it back to bed.

Christopher’s tired voice caught his attention, “Buck?”

Buck plastered on a false smile, lifting his head, as he turned in his chair, “Hey, buddy.” He tried to clear his throat, but his voice came out hoarse, “What are you doing up?”

Christopher tilted his head, “Are you okay?”

Buck thought he could lie but as he stared into Christopher’s eyes he knew he could, but his words escaped him, so he simply shook his head, his lower lip trembling.

Christopher sped over, opening up his arms.

Buck crumpled to the floor, on his knees, collecting Christopher in a hug, tucking his forehead against his shoulder.

“It’s okay, Buck,” Christopher whispered in his ear, brushing his hand through Buck’s hair, “Nothing bad is going to happen.”

Buck squeaked, closing his eyes as he let out of a sob, “I’m sorry.”

“You can be sad,” Christopher assured him, “It’s normal.”

“Yeah,” Buck nodded as he clung on tighter, “It is.”

The bedroom door clicked open, and a half-asleep Eddie emerged, stopping by the wall, eyes on them.

Buck leaned, pressing a hand to Christopher’s cheek, “I love you, Superman.”

Christopher smiled, as wide as he could, “I love you too, Papa.”

Eddie raised a hand, laying it under his chin as he struggled to hide the fondest of grins.

Buck chuckled through his tears, as he clung onto Christopher, his feet finally on dry land.

6: Eddie

Eddie kept going to the mirror to make sure that his tie was positioned properly, if he sat still for too long, his leg started bouncing and his heart would race.

He’d been a groom before, but his and Shannon’s wedding was quick, not many people attended the ceremony, it was a spur-of-the-moment decision that the pair made together.

With Buck, Eddie knew that this commitment was one he was making, until the end; he and Buck were entangled, in more ways than one.

God, Eddie loved him, he really did; sometimes he’d focus on the time they’d lost while they were idiots who never discussed their feelings, but he couldn’t concentrate on that.

Buck was more than perfect because they were best friends first, and still were, to this day, which made that step to boyfriends, that much easier; Buck loved Christopher like his own, before he and Eddie were together, which was beautiful.

There's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you.

When Eddie had muttered those words, he should have realized, there and then, his true feelings but he left it too long, pushed his future further away.

He wouldn’t let that happen again.

That didn’t relieve the pressure that had rested on his chest, he was terrified of getting it wrong, or tripping up when he needed his balance the most.

He’d never considered the dangers of his job until he started counting the odds with Buck’s life, as well as his own.

He couldn’t lose another, his heart wouldn’t be able to take another blow, and Buck wasn’t exactly known for his level-headedness.

Despite that, since they started dating, both of them were far more responsible on calls, Bobby wished they’d been together since the beginning.

Christopher was sitting on the chair, in the corner of the room, dangling his legs in anticipation, “Are you okay, Dad?”

Eddie clapped his hands together, “I’m fine,” He rubbed the nape of his neck, “Just a little nervous.”

Christopher sang loudly, “It’s gonna be so cool.”

Eddie chuckled with a nod, “It is.”

“Pepa helped me with my speech,” Christopher beamed, happy with his Best Man role.

Eddie moved over, pushing Christopher’s hair out of his eyes, “You excited about that?”

“Yeah!” Christopher nodded, “Chimney is doing his first.”

Eddie rolled his eyes, knowing what that was going to entail, “He is, is he?”

“Then me!” Christopher exclaimed, “Auntie Karen typed it up on cards for me.”

Eddie smiled; this day was a serious family affair, “I can’t wait, buddy.”

Christopher chuckled, “Athena said Bobby will cry first today.”

“I bet,” Eddie sat beside him, breathing slow, leaning his arm against Christopher’s side.

“Dad,” Christopher held up his head, “You’re gonna be Eddie Diaz-Buckley, and Papa is gonna be Buck Diaz-Buckley?”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Eddie smiled, he and Buck couldn’t wait for all the pranks they would pull at work with the name changes.

“Can I change mine?” Christopher asked, “To Christopher Diaz-Buckley?”

The pressure shifted off Eddie, for a moment, as he folded an arm around Christopher’s back, “If you want.”

“I do!” Christopher threw up his arms, “I love Buck.”

Eddie smiled, “I do too.”

Christopher leaned his head on his arm, “I love you, Dad.”

“Love you too, buddy,” He bowed down, pressing a kiss in Christopher’s hair.

There was a knock at the door, Eddie’s dad poked his head around, “It’s time, boys.”

Christopher held Eddie’s hand, tight, “We got this, Dad.”

As they piled into the corridor, and Eddie was met by a wall of his family, he let go of a slow breath, he was more than ready.

Meeting Buck at the altar, holding his hands tight, smiling with tears in his eyes, and seeing their son a couple of steps away; he’d never been happier.

[arcturusreads]

PLEASE DROP A PT 2 OF PRAYERS FOR THE PLUMBER

Prayers for the Plumber Part Two

You can find part one here

I hope you enjoy this one! And I might just have a part three in mind...

It had been a full day since the Hayes clan had descended upon Meredith house. Thankfully, the kids had gotten along well enough and there hadn’t been any issues with them. Bailey had been basking in the fact that there were more boys in the house that he could talk to.

With Irene and Cormac both at work, Meredith was currently keeping an eye on all five of the kids not that Cormac’s son really needed adult supervision. The two of them were set up in the living room finishing off their homework whilst her own kids were in the back garden playing. Relishing in the calm and quiet, Meredith had sat herself down on the dining table with her paperwork and tablet, fuelled by a large mug of coffee she was sure would see at least three refills before her work was done.

She’d lost herself reading a research paper when someone had cleared their throat. Jumping a little she looked up to see Liam and Austin standing by the table, sheepish looks on both of their faces.

“Sorry, Dr Grey,” Austin murmured.

She shook her head smiling at them, “Don’t worry about it, I should have been paying more attention. And I thought I told you both to call me Meredith.” It was odd having two kids who were living with her call her Dr Grey, she wanted them to feel comfortable around the house. “Is everything okay?

Meredith couldn’t help but be slightly concerned. Cormac had often spoken about how independent his kids now were. They liked doing their own thing, didn’t need anyone to keep an eye on them and were fairly self-sufficient. So, hackles were raised when they had decided to come over to her.

“Uh, yeah. Actually, we were wondering if we could talk to you…” Austin began to trail off, feeling slightly awkward and stupid that he should even ask her.

When Cormac had first brought up the like of Dr Grey at home, the boys were immediately curious. They didn’t take a whole load of interest in Cormac’s colleagues but they knew that he didn’t really speak to a lot of them when they were in Switzerland. He wasn’t particularly close to anyone but Dr Grey was something that he couldn’t seem to stop mentioning. The boys were pretty sure that Cormac didn’t even realise how much he brought her up in conversation.

So, after the second week of hearing about her, Austin and Liam had decided to do some snooping online. Typing in the words Meredith Grey came up with multiple articles on the woman that the boys were pretty sure was the one their Dad didn’t stop going on about. She was successful and obviously busy so Austin felt like an idiot for disturbing her.

“Yeah, sure. Pull up a chair,” she nodded to the two seats on one side of her.

Feeling a little relief wash over them, the boys took a seat, glad that Meredith hadn’t just turned them away.

“Da said that you lost your husband a couple of years ago.” Liam hadn’t been quite sure how to bring this topic up and couldn’t help but feel slightly guilty at the mention of it. He had seen the way his dad got when their mom was mentioned.

A sad smile crossed Meredith face, “Yeah, it’s been around six years now.”

Before Liam could carry on, Austin interrupted. “Sorry, we didn’t mean to bring it up.”

“No, no. It’s okay, did you guys want to ask something?”

The ache of losing Derek had never completely left her. There were days where it hit her like a tsunami wave, where it took every ounce of her strength to get through the day when her kids were the only reason that she was able to survive. Today, that ache wasn’t all-consuming. There were two kids in front of her that had lost their mother, they’d watched her die. So, if they had questions they wanted to ask, or just wanted to talk to her about it then she could be there for them.

“Have you dated someone since then?” Austin looked down at his hands as he asked.

That wasn’t the question that Meredith had been expecting but she still answered. “I have but it took some time. Dating other people… it’s never once meant that I stopped loving Derek. He’s always with me.”

Austin slowly nodded as she spoke. It was the answer that he had wanted to hear. Abigail had told both Liam and Austin to make sure that their dad eventually moved on when the time was right. At the time, they’d agreed, wanting to do anything their mother had wanted them to do. They’d also spoken about to their aunt. Irene had been worried that Cormac would end up spending the rest of his days lonely, especially as the boys got older and went to college. They’d all come to the conclusion that within the next year they were going to get him on a dating app.

The reality of it was different though. Cormac hadn’t been with anyone since Abi had passed away. He hadn’t shown interest in anyone, so their mother’s final wish had been pushed to the back of their mind. Until recently when the boys could tell that the mere mention of a certain General Surgeon was enough to change his demeanour.

They knew, in their heart of hearts, that their dad would never stop loving Abigail. They saw the way he still looked over the old photo albums, a softness taking over his eyes. They heard the way he spoke about her like she was still the breath of fresh air in his life. Hearing it from someone else though, someone who had lost the person they were meant to spend the rest of their life with, gave both of the boys a little more comfort.

“Could I ask you something else?”

“Sure,” Meredith had pushed her work to the side, giving the boys her full attention.

Austin looked out of the kitchen window, glancing at the three kids playing out there. It had only then struck him how young they must have been when their dad had passed away. He wondered how many memories of him were actually solidified in their mind.

“How did you kids take it? I’m sorry if I’m being nosey but…”

“But you want to know and that’s understandable. You aren’t being nosey.” Meredith sighed, thinking back to the first time she had told them. “Zola’s the only one who really remembers Derek. Bailey was too young, and I only found out I was having Ellis after he had passed away. Zola was the one who found it hardest to get her head around, it took a lot of reassuring that no one was ever going to replace her dad. I wouldn’t ever want that but my kids… sometimes I think they’re smarter than me.” She laughed, they were Derek’s kids, alright. “They want me to be happy, Ellis wants me to find my second Prince Charming but it’s not always going to be straightforward. For them or for me.”

“We think dad wants to date!” Liam suddenly blurted out.

His brother quickly jabbed him in the ribs, making him wince. “What? It’s true!”

“Oh,” Meredith was a little shocked. The past couple of months, she had thought there was something going on between them. Neither of them had outwardly mentioned it, of course, but she had honestly thought that there had been something there. Meredith quickly schooled her face into a neutral expression.

“Would that be okay with the two of you? Because I’m sure your dad wouldn’t want to do anything that would make you both uncomfortable.” Meredith couldn’t help it, but half of her mind was on the conversation and the other half was trying to figure out who the hell Cormac was considering dating.

The boys looked at each other. They’d had their own conversations about it when Cormac had been at work, or after one of his long conversations about Meredith. They hadn’t liked the idea at first, hated it if they were honest. But over time they’d realised that this is exactly what their dad needed and what their mom had wanted. Plus, they were pretty sure that if he started to dare someone then that should have less time to yell at them. They smiled; both having come to the same conclusion.

“I think after talking to you about it, we’d be pretty cool with him dating.”

[the-modernmary]

my best habit || aaron hotchner x reader (ch. 7)

Chapter summary: Your best friend confronts you about your revived relationship with Aaron and how much things have changed from two years ago when you run into the BAU at a bar. 

A/N: This chapter is definitely not my finest work, but we get some background on Hotch and reader. The part that is italicized is a flashback.

masterlist || read on ao3

Don't you want to take time and get to love me? We could build a perfect world I got tricks I really want to show you I could be your perfect girl - Wolf Alice, “Your Love's Whore"

~~~~~~~

“Okay, I can’t deal with this anymore. I have to say something.”

You looked up from your textbook to see the disappointed stare of your best friend, Aly, from the other side of the bar. She worked as a bartender, so sometimes you would hang out with her while she was working, maybe do some homework, and she would give you drinks with the employee discount price.

The two of you had been best friends since you were in middle school. When your mom died and your dad went back to prison, you were originally supposed to be shipped off to live with an aunt in another state that you had never met before, but Aly’s parents decided to claim legal guardianship over you, allowing you to live with them. From then on, you and Aly had become inseparable, even following each other to college. 

You snorted softly and took a sip from your drink. “Oh boy, this should be interesting,” you said sarcastically, and Aly rolled her eyes as she tossed the bar towel over her shoulder.

“You are acting way too casual about the whole Aaron thing.” You groaned, but she didn’t give you a chance to speak up. “He just shows up out of the blue after two years, and you dive right back in, head first, and act like nothing changed? You’re not even going to ask him what happened?”

You sighed. You knew that this was going to be a conversation that Aly was going to have with you at some point, and you were actually a little surprised that it took her a full month before saying anything, but that didn’t mean you liked it. “Yeah, because the murder of his ex-wife and the attempted murder of his son makes great pillow talk. No, I haven’t talked to him about that.” You rolled your eyes as you finished the rest of your drink. “And I don’t need to. The only reason you’re making this a big deal is because you don’t like Aaron.”

She stared at you in disbelief. “Don’t like him? Babe, how can I have any opinion on him if I don’t know him? I didn’t even know that you were sleeping with him until you called me crying because you thought-”

“I really don’t want to have this conversation,” you cut her off, and you pushed your empty glass towards her, wordlessly asking for a refill. You didn’t want to go through those memories right now. Or ever, if you could help it. “I don’t need to know everything about his life. It’s not like we’re getting married.”

Aly raised an eyebrow at you as she started to make you another drink. “Maybe not, but do you want to? Do you want an actual relationship?”

“No!” you said, too quickly and too defensively, but it was true. You liked what you had with Aaron, all of the benefits and fun parts of dating somebody without any of the responsibilities. But you understood where Aly was coming from.

If there were such a thing as “Build-A-Boyfriend”, and if you were being completely honest with yourself, your ideal partner would probably be a lot like Aaron. More age appropriate perhaps, less baggage for sure, and most likely with a different job, one that didn’t slowly chip away at his soul until he became a shell of a man.

But somebody determined and focused like him. With a soft side like his, and the same dry sense of humor as him. A person you could talk to for hours, who sees you and pushes you towards greatness. Maybe even somebody who makes you feel special because they can only ever relax and be carefree around you. Somebody who just wants to do good in the world and who cares.

Somebody like that.

Aly opened her mouth to say something, but it quickly closed it as she looked at the entrance. “Damn, there’s a group coming in. Okay, I actually have to do my job now. But we will talk about this later.”

You started to tease her until you caught sight of the said group walking in. “Shit,” you hissed under your breath, turning your back towards the door and praying they didn’t see you. “We summoned them.”

Aly looked at you in confusion. “Y/N, what-”

“That’s Aaron and his team,” you whispered, although it didn’t matter much, “and will you please stop staring?”

A gasp left Aly’s mouth and, in true best friend fashion, she didn’t stop staring. Despite Penelope’s invitation a week earlier, you had been able to avoid going out with the BAU team. It wasn’t that you didn’t like them - you actually really liked being around them - but it would have made things way too complicated with Aaron. He compartmentalized even more than you. “Which one is he?” she asked excitedly, and you had to reach over the bar to get her to turn around.

“You’re going to draw so much attention to yourself,” you hissed, and the two of you started to frantically talk over each other.

“Because I want to know which one-”

“- Tell you later -”

“- have to at least take their order -”

“- Really don’t want to see them -”

“- Coming over here now -”

“Hey Y/N!”

You grimaced to yourself before turning around on the barstool, forcing a smile. Penelope was the one who greeted you, but the rest of the BAU had made their way to where you were sitting. The looks they were giving you unsettled you, like they all knew something you didn’t, but you decided to chalk it up to nervousness. Aaron, however, was standing in the back and looking about as mortified as you felt.

“Hey guys,” you said, stretching out each word. You weren’t drunk enough for this. “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world…”

“Casablanca,” Spencer noted out loud. 

Aly smirked and leaned against the bar. “Y/N, are you going to introduce me to all of your FBI friends?”

You had to fight the urge to glare at her, because you knew what she was doing. She wanted you to introduce her to Aaron, but she was just going to have to wait. “Aly, this is the BAU team. BAU team, this is Aly.”

Aly pouted at you but surprisingly said nothing else. You weren’t sure if you were grateful for that or if it just made you more nervous.

Emily looked at the open textbook that was long forgotten next to you. “Are you studying at a bar?” she asked, amusement evident in her voice. “I thought only Reid did that.”

You shrugged and closed the textbook. “I was studying, but I gave up on that about an hour ago,” you admitted. 

“Good!” Penelope said excitedly. “Because if you’re not studying, then you can join us!”

Your eyes flicked nervously to Aaron, whose face was completely unreadable. You wanted him to give you some sign of what he thought would be the best, but he just stared at you, stoic as ever. The conversation that you had with Aly was playing on repeat in your mind, making you feel sick. You didn’t care about Aaron’s past. You couldn’t care.

“Oh, I don’t want to intrude,” you settled on.

“It’s no intrusion at all,” Rossi piped up, and you and Aaron both stiffened. Rossi knew about you and Aaron, so the fact that he was encouraging you to mingle with the rest of the group was a bad sign. “And besides, drinks are on me tonight.”

Aly laughed from behind the bar. “If that’s the case, then she is definitely joining you guys so that she can stop mooching off my employee discount without even tipping me.”

So just like that, it was settled. You grumbled something about always tipping as you grabbed your drink and your textbook before following the group to a large corner booth. You didn’t miss the smirks each of the team members was throwing your way, and you definitely noticed that they left the only open seat next to Aaron. The two of your exchanged tight-lipped smiles as you slid into the empty space, careful not to touch Aaron. This was partly because you wanted to keep a calm and collected exterior, even if the team did know about you and Aaron - which you had started to suspect.

It was also partly because the idea of being Aaron’s dirty little secret right in front of his coworkers was too tempting, and you already had 2 long island iced teas, so you did not trust your self-control.

“So Y/N,” JJ started, breaking you out of your thoughts. You had hoped, maybe naively, that they would just ignore you and let you observe for the night. “Does Aly go to law school with you?”

You laughed despite yourself and you shook your head. “God, no. Although, she did take the LSAT with me so that even if I totally bombed it, I wouldn’t have the worst score.”

“What did you get on it?” Spencer asked, and you saw Aaron perk up slightly at the question.

“A 174,” you beamed.

“Look at you go! You’re like our own personal Elle Woods!” Penelope praised, and your heart swelled at the use of the word “our”, like you were already a part of the group.

“I wish,” you chuckled. “But that brilliant bitch got a 179.”

A simultaneous “Who?” came from both Spencer and Aaron.

“From Legally Blonde?” you prompted, but were met with more confused stares. “The greatest lawyer movie of all time?” They shook their heads again. “Okay, you both need to watch it, it’s a classic. Miss Woods was quite literally the only reason I was able to get through my first year.”

Well, that and fucking Aaron every chance you got, but they didn’t need to know that. 

You heard a gasp come from Penelope. “We should do another movie night! We haven’t had one of those in a while.”

Emily laughed and nudged Penelope softly. “Do you not remember the fiasco we had last time we did a movie night? We almost burnt down Rossi’s house.”

Laughter erupted from the table as multiple parties started to talk over each other, and you were happy to slide into the background, making little quips when the conversation called for it. The most surprising part of the whole night was how easily you got along with the BAU group, and how much they seemed to like you. Less surprising, however, was how acutely aware you were of Aaron’s thigh, which was now pressed against your own.

Aaron had stayed completely silent since the time the team walked up to you, and you could only imagine what was going on in his head. This whole situation was probably a living nightmare for him, and you couldn’t say you blamed him. Your choice to keep Aaron a secret from your friends was just that - a personal choice. You didn’t want them to fuss over you or put delusions in your head of a future with Aaron. You wanted to be able to enjoy your privacy.

But the implications for Aaron were much more severe, especially now that you were actually working at the FBI. People would start to question his judgment, whether or not he was fit for his job. They would question if he had taken advantage of you or manipulated you, and that would all be before they even found out that the two of you were sleeping together years ago. He could very possibly be seen as just a high ranking government official who was sneaking around with a girl almost 20 years his junior.

In other words, it would look really, really bad for him. You downed the rest of your drink in one go.

Aaron raised his eyebrows as he watched your actions, his gaze heavy. His eyes ran up and down your body, and you could feel yourself start to overheat. He felt much closer than he was. Somewhere in the back of your mind, you noticed that the rest of the team had scattered among the bar - some playing pool, some ordering more drinks, and some in the bathroom - which left you and Aaron alone in the booth. There was enough room that he didn’t need to have his leg pressed up against you, and he definitely didn’t need to bring his hand down to your knee, but he did. 

“So, a 174? Impressive.”

“Mhm,” you mused, keeping your voice casual. “Does that surprise you?”

“Not at all,” he responded, no hesitation in his voice. 

His response didn’t surprise you much, but you preened at the compliment all the same. You wanted people, especially Aaron, to think of you as effortlessly successful and to be impressed by you. So you didn’t show them the countless hours spent in the library, and the many all nighters you pulled. You were careful to only show people the parts of you that you could brag about, like your class rankings or debates on subjects you were an expert in, so that it looked like it came naturally to you. So you didn’t look like you were struggling.

Part of that came after your mom died. You didn’t want everybody fussing over you and treating you like you were breakable, so you quickly decided to show that you were independent. If you didn’t give people a reason to worry about you, they’d leave you alone. 

The other part of that came during law school. You knew yourself enough to realize that it was probably because of Aaron, and how much he rubbed off on you. You wanted to be engaging like him, to be able to completely command a room without even saying a word like him. You wanted success like him. Aaron noticed that early on and challenged you. He let you debate with him just so that you could practice going against somebody smarter and more experienced than you. And it paid off. 

~~~~~~~

You stared at the email on your phone, your cheeks sore from how much you were smiling. You had already told all of your friends, but their reaction wasn’t as satisfying as you wanted. They were ecstatic for you, but realistically, you only wanted the approval of one person. 

Your thumb hovered over Aaron’s contact in your phone, debating on whether or not to call him. This could probably be a text, but Aaron was so formal when texting, even when dirty texts were involved. Besides, you wanted to hear Aaron’s approval, and even more than that, you wanted his attention. Even if it was just for a minute or two, you wanted his attention in the middle of a weekday, something you never got. 

Before you could talk yourself out of it, you hit the call button and brought the phone up to your ear. 

“Aaron Hotchner,” came the greeting, formal as ever. 

“Aaron, hi,” you started, and you were happy that Aaron couldn’t see the way you were nervously tugging the hem of your shirt. 

There was a beat of silence. “Y/N,” he said, surprise evident in his voice. “Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, everything is great! I, uh…” You realized that you didn’t have a good explanation to give to Aaron as to why you were calling him while he was at work. “Is this a good time?”

You could hear light footsteps on the other side of the phone, followed by the soft click of a door closing. “That depends on the subject matter,” he mused, his voice lowering.

All the nervousness you felt melted away. “I made law review!” you blurted excitedly. “I just got the email and I didn’t have anybody else to tell. And God knows you’ve helped edit my papers enough, so I figured I’d share this with you.”

You wished that you could have seen Aaron’s face. You wanted to know if he was smiling, or if he looked proud. In hindsight, telling him in person probably would have been more rewarding. 

“I knew you’d get it,” he told you sincerely. “Automatic or write on?”

“Automatic,” you told him proudly.

“Congratulations, Y/N. That’s a big deal. I’m sure you’re going to celebrate tonight. It’s Bar Review night, right?”

You hummed to yourself, attempting to calm your nerves. You dropped your voice, adding a more seductive tone. “Actually… I was hoping that maybe I could be rewarded for all my hard work? Please?”

He hadn’t said no to you yet, and you doubted today would be any different. 

Aaron chuckled, low and dark. “Mhm, since you asked so nicely…” His voice trailed off, and you could practically hear him stiffen up. “But I can’t tonight.”

”Oh.” He didn't elaborate, and doesn’t have to. If it were for a case, he would have told you. When he didn’t say anything, that meant it was a Haley and Jack thing. Still, you couldn’t help but note the disappointment that bled into his words. 

“Are you busy this weekend?” he asked, his voice soft. “We could meet in Baltimore. Same hotel. I can make reservations now.”

For the second time that day, you smiled so wide that your cheeks hurt. Attention was what you wanted, and attention was what you got. “Baltimore sounds good. Send me the details.”

~~~~~~~

You mindlessly stirred the ice in your empty glass with the straw, listening to the soft clinking. “What about you? What did you get on your LSAT?”

Aaron thought about it for a second. “A 176. I think.”

A bitter chuckle left your lips and you turned in your seat just enough so that you could face Aaron. You were so close to him that, even in the dark lighting of the bar, you could make out every feature on his face. “Christ, and here I was thinking I could out-lawyer you,” you teased.

Aaron took a sip of his drink — double scotch neat. “I’ve seen the way you like to argue with me. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t want to go up against you in court,” he scoffed. 

“Hm, yeah but you like it when I argue with you,” you pointed out, leaning in closer to him. “Because then you get to shut me up.”

Aaron set his drink down on the table, his face never betraying any sort of emotion. “Come over tonight,” he told you, his voice lowering. The hand that was on your knee slowly trailed up your thigh, his fingers leaving goosebumps in their wake.

You smirked, deciding to mess with him a little. “Presumptuous of you to assume I don’t already have plans after this.” You didn’t, and Aaron knew that. He somehow always knew. 

In spite of that, he decided to indulge your teasing. “Cancel them.” It wasn’t a suggestion, and he punctuated his demand by squeezing your thigh. “I can help you study later.”

That was all the convincing you needed. You slipped out of the booth, ready to pull him straight out of the bar, but his face gave you pause. “Meet me at my car in two minutes,” he told you firmly, and you nodded obediently and sat back down.

You watched him start to walk out of the bar, only to be stopped by Emily and Derek. You watched as the three of them talked, Aaron's whole body tensing. There was a lull in the conversation before the three of them looked over at you, Emily and Derek trying to hide their drunken smiles.

They knew. They had to know. It’s not like you and Aaron were being subtle. In some part of your subconscious, you were sure that they knew long before tonight, and that this was just a confirmation. Still, you didn’t know how Aaron was going to react. You thought that Aaron was going to deny it, or even end things with you right there. Besides that one office-sex slip up, Aaron had been so careful about keeping you a secret from his professional life, even going as far as asking you to not call his office phone. In a shocking turn of events, he just smiled and gave you a small nod before making his way towards the door.

Figuring that you didn’t need to wait the two minutes anymore, you started to head towards the exit, blushing as you went. You could feel everybody’s eyes on you the whole time, but when you looked around, none of them seemed to be judging you. If anything, they seemed… happy? You were just about to reach the doors when Penelope cut you off.

“Does this mean you’ll start having lunch with me in the Batcave?” she said excitedly, not even needing to preface her question. They all knew.

“Whenever I get a chance,” you promised.

Penelope reached down to grab your hands, covering them both with hers. “Good! It can get lonely when they’re all off saving the world.”

“Hey Penelope,” you started, pursing your lips nervously. “Is this thing with Aaron and I… is it okay? I don’t want to make things weird for your team.”

Penelope gave you a sympathetic look and shook her head quickly, like even the very act of bringing it up made her sad. “Of course it’s okay! Hotch is happier than we’ve seen him in a long time, and that’s all we want for him. He’s a good guy who has just been through too much. But if he gives you any problems, you come straight to us. You’re one of us now.”

Then, without any warning, Penelope pulled you into the tightest hug you’ve ever gotten. You could smell her perfume, something floral and sweet. “Thank you,” you said as she let you go.

“Oh no, thank you,” she retorted, grinning. “Now you go have fun.”

You laughed and walked out of the bar, making your way to the parking lot. Part of you was still worried about Aaron’s reaction to knowing the secret was out.

But when you saw Aaron leaning against his car, and you saw his smile when he looked up to see you, all your fears were assuaged. “Who ambushed you?” he called from across the parking lot, his voice light.

“Penelope,” you admitted, and he nodded unsurprised as he opened the passenger side door for you.

You buckled your seatbelt and watched as Aaron made his way into the driver's seat and loosened his tie. “Are you okay with them knowing?” you asked nervously.

Aaron was quiet as he started the car, so quiet that you thought that maybe he didn’t even hear you. It wasn’t until the car pulled out of the parking lot that he spoke. “Yes,” he told you, and it truly seemed like he meant it. Then, as a joke, he added, “Although, I reserve the right to change my mind after seeing them at work tomorrow.” 

“What?” you teased. “You’re not going to spill all of the dirty details to your coworkers?”

Aaron laughed and fuck if that wasn’t the most beautiful sound you’ve ever heard. “I thought you needed to study.”

You shrugged and leaned over the center console just far enough to press a kiss to his jaw. “I do. So you better make it worth my time,” you purred into his ear, smirking as you watched his knuckles turn white from clenching the steering wheel. “Or you can get me off while I study?”

You thought back to what Aly had said about whether things changed between you and Aaron. On paper, everything had changed. There was no need for secrecy or sneaking around anymore. You wouldn’t need to travel an hour outside of the city just to be seen with each other in public. The unspoken rules were going to change, considering the two of you had broken pretty much all of them already. Aaron had changed, and so had you. It was impossible for it to be the same as it was two years ago.

But as you sat in the passenger’s seat of his car, Aaron grinning devilishly at you, you couldn’t help but think that at its core, nothing really changed. 

[vanilla-vivillon]

On November 14th Zoya and Nikolai had welcomed there third child into this world

Prince Koloda Grigori Nazyalensky 5Koda for short

He had warm brown skin and a smattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks

he had inherited his fathers blond locks in cute ringlets

And had the deep watchful brown eyes Zoya remembered her father had

He was rather quiet

And now that Myca was five and Nazariy was three

They could actually have an opinion about a new sibling

“How come he has blond hair? I want blonde hair!” Nazariy whined pulled at an ebony lock

Nikolai, Myca, and Nazariy were in Koda’s nursery

Nikolai wanted to let Zoya rest

And he adored his sons but saints they were annoying and Zoya needed a break

“Ask Aunt Genya to tailor your hair then” Myca swiftly replied

A new habit of Mycas was trying to fix Nazariys complaints

It seems Myca hasn’t realized that Nazariy like many three year olds complains for the sake of complaining

“Hey Dad I have a question” Myca stated

“What’s up Myca?” Nikolai had been to infatuated with Koda to fully Pay attention to his other sons

Nikolai felt the guilt creep in

The Old King mostly ignored Nikolai his entire upbringing

It was always Vasily

Nikolai swore that he would never make his children feel like that

“What’s up Myca?” Nikolai asked

“Why did you give Koda the middle name Grigori?” Myca wondered

“After an old friend me and Mommy had” Nikolai gave an easy reaponse

Apparently bored of complaining Nazariy piped up “who’s this friend?”

“A bear” Nikolai said with a wink

“Now way!” Myca explained as Nazariys eyes went wide

“You can’t be friends with a bear!” Myca stated

“Well if you don’t believe... I don’t think I can tell you the story...” Nikolai said feigning indecision

“What! No! We believe you Daddy! Please tell us the story” Nazariy begged glaring at Myca

“Well it started with a sandstorm....”

Nazariy was four now and his testing date was coming up

His mother and father were off on a two month emergency peace visit with the Shu

And Naza was glad

It started at Breakfast

He was doing what he usually would do

Try to get Koda to laugh

Annoy Myca

The usual

But when Myca got the last cup of orange juice Naza thought it was unfair

He wished he could make that cup tip over and spill over Mycas kefta

It was so unfair Myca could train at The Little Palace and Nazariy couldn’t

He felt something deep inside him

Something odd and funny

That thing that came whenever he saw Mom or Dad praise Myca at summoning

Nazariy always ignored it

But now Nazariy directed the weird feeling towards his older brothers juice

“What the-”the orange juice tipped over and spilled on Mycas homework

“Delano is gonna kill me! We need these for the big project!” Myca exclaimed while trying to dry it with wind

A tiny part of Nazariy felt bad

But he should’ve given me that orange juice

Nazariy learned he could do many things

Like push someone to trip

Or float a cookie over to him

And one day he wanted to try something bigger

Nazariy and his brothers were strictly forbidden from going into the meeting room

He didn’t know why

But the thrill of trouble made him want to do it more

He found some Kerch etherrealki to help him

When you needed a job done Amani Patel was the girl to talk to

She gave him easy enough plans to get in and was able to sneak inside

It was a cozy room with plush leather sofas and a display case of alcohol

Nazariy wandered around a bit

It had a fireplace he was able to set ablaze using his newfound abilities

By now Nazariy figured out that he was a Squaller

But he hadn’t told anyone yet

He would eventually but for now this was just a him thing

Nazariy didn’t have a lot of secrets

So it was nice to have one

He started looking around and it seemed like a normal looking living room

Some cards

A fireplace

Dreadfully boring

But what was real interesting was an odd contraption

It must’ve been one of David Kostyk’s inventions

It had a yellow horn and a disk in a box

And Nazairy gave in to the urge to touch it

He started poking around at it and nothing seemed to happen

Until it started playing music

“Wooooow” Nazariy said astonished as smooth jazz began to play

He got on the table and started jumping up and down dancing

Nazariy then started creating some wind causing the cards and checkers to fly up(like that one scene In Matilda)

The breeze was nice

“You having a dance party Nazariy?”

Nazariy instantly dropped everything and turned towards the door

There stood his parents and the triumvirate mouths agape

Nazariy looked at his father the speaker In question

“I thought you would be gone for three more weeks” Nazariy stuttered sneaking glances at his mother to see how much trouble he’s in

Blue eyes wide and mouth agape the Queen seemed to stunned to talk

“Yeah, Makhi was more agreeable then we thought” Genya replied agasht

In fact the only one who seemed unfazed was David Kostyk

He nonchalantly went an turned off the weird music box

Adrik Zhabin seemed to regain his composure

Nazariy and Adrik never really got along

Nazariy was the type who enjoyed a good ruckous

And Adrik was the type who despised shenanigans

“You aren’t allowed to be in here” Adrik glared “And I hope you know your the one who’s going to clean this up”

“Oh come on, the kid was just having fun!” Tamar said picking Nazariy up and placing him off the table

“He ruined by poetry” Tolya sighed staring at the mess of a bookshelf

Books were torn and haphazard around the room

“Is that really a travesty” Nazariy murmured under his breath

It seemed everyone was still in shock

Especially his mother

She regained her composure

“So your also a Squaller?” Zoya questioned

But she wasn’t happy either

“Uhhhhhhhh...” Nazariy squeaked

“A prince doesn’t stutter Nazariy” Zoya scolded raising a brow

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m Grisha” Nazariy stated now raising his head and straightening his back

Nazariy couldn’t read his mother

She didn’t look mad

But she definitely wasn’t happy

At that Nikolai picked up Nazariy

“You couldn’t have a nice and easy testing to find out huh?” Nikolai laughed

Whenever his dad laughed Nazariy had to laugh to

They were quite close those two

While Myca and his father could have trouble sometimes

Nazariy was always easier

Whiny Nikolai could handle

But dead serious was trickier

“He wants to keep us on our toes”Tamar replied smoothly

Zoya who seemed to be done deliberating exclaimed “Everyone out except Nikolai and Nazariy”

Everyone shuffled out of the room shooting him putting looks

And patting him on the back

Once the door closed Zoya turned her eyes on him

They weren’t silver so it wasn’t like she was enraged

“How long have you known?” Zoya questioned

Nikolai stood behind Nazariy

In times like this when Nazariy messes up his dad was kinda like his lawyer

“Three weeks”

“And does anyone else know?” Nikolai asked

Nazariy shook his head “not even Myca"

“Why didn’t you tell anyone?” Zoya wondered

“I don’t know” Nazariy replied to quickly

Zoya raised a brow

“Well.... it’s just” Nazariy started grasping for words “I don’t really have a lot of me things that are just mine... now I always have to share everything with Koda and Mycas always super busy. I was gonna tell you i swear!”

His parents exchanged glances

“We’re not mad Nazariy” His father finally said

“But we want you to know you can tell us anything” Zoya finished

“Okay Mommy” Nazariy said with a smile

I can’t even pretend I’m doing this for anyone but myself. I don’t know if anyone actually reads these but yolo lol.

As always, my ask box is open and I take any Grishaverse requests

[d-targaryenshoe]

By Chance • Jackson Avery

Requested?: @lorenakaspersen ❤️

Summary: Y/N and Jackson have a kid together but when heartache gets too hard, then worse things happen

Warnings: surgery

Word Count: 1538

Letting go of someone you love with all your hear is hard sometimes, very hard. Knowing that you will no longer be the person they wake up next to. Or who they laugh with at the dumbest things.

The fact having a son together doesn't make it any easier. Not easier because you can't ask anything without being akward. Or thinking about the moments you have been through together.

Your son was the most important thing in your life. He was the reason you kept going and kept smiling.

But right now, you were walking in the rain. Hoping everything would turn back to normal, and the biggest impossibilities would turn possible. Just for this once.

Standing on the sidewalk, you were looking at a couple across the street, sitting next to each other, hands intertwined and live dripping of the both of them.

A sad smile was formed on your lips before a couple of tears decided to make their way up into your eyes, telling you that breaking wasn't a bad thing. It meant healing.

Watching down the street, car lights and shop lights where filling your sight, knowing that beautiful things still existed. You just had to find them and sometimes it just happened.

Throwing your handbag on the ground, you released a scream, being frustrated how your life had turned out. A single mother who was still in love with the father of your son.

"Ma'am, are you okay?" Turning around a male around his 30's frowned at your face as he noticed the tears. "Can i help you?"

You released a sarcastic laugh, clapping your hands. "I'm a single mother who has a son and left his father because she knew he didn't want a kid, now he has a new girlfriend, a badass firefighter, no I'm not okay."

The man opened up his mouth to say something but instead he closed it, trying to process your rambling. "I should go."

"Yeah, you should!" Now you saw a couple people staring at you from a distance, which made you slightly walk backwards.

"Ma'am watch where you're going!" Before you could listen to the person yelling, you turned and saw two white headlights blinding your sight before you felt a hard blow on yourself.

As a person called an ambulance within a few minutes a siren was heard and people started to make a small crowd, curious to see what had happened.

The back double doors opened as the small black female walked out, known as Miranda Bailey followed by Meredith Grey.

"What happened?" Miranda demanded as she slightly glared at the people who were just staring at the scene. "Anyone gonna tell me?"

"Bailey, look at this!" Meredith motioned for the female to walk over, wanting to show her colleague something important.

Taking a hold of your hand, the blonde woman showed your ring finger, a silver ring placed on it. More to say, a ring that meant more to you than anyone could know.

"Are you freaking kidding me? Grey, look for any open wounds, she'll need surgery, Avery can't know." The woman was close to losing her cool as you were one of the persons she was the most protective of.

"The side of her stomach is swelled, probably a bleeding spleen, we need to transfer her." Meredith spoke up, pulling your shirt back down, looking at you with pursed lips.

"Gurney!" Taking a hold of the gurney Bailey and Meredith placed you down, rolling you into the ambulance, closing both of the doors.

"How am I suppose to not say anything to Jackson, he deserves to know, you know he does?" The blonde female stated, watching Bailey shake her head in denial.

"He's screwing a hot firefighter over Y/N damn Y/L/N, he doesn't, Grey." Miranda snapped when crossing her arms in anger. "He really doesn't."

Meredith frowned in deep thoughts, knowing somewhere she was right. But yet she felt bad, knowing she had to keep this to herself.

He cared somewhere although Vic wasn't what you were. She was pushy, you did everything on a low tempo. She was work addicted, you made time.

"Get up, we're here." Miranda spoke softly, taking a hold of the gurney at the end of the gurney, rolling you slowly out.

"Let's get you into surgery." Meredith mumbled, trying to give herself some courage, to not say anything and to save you.

"You got her?" The dark woman questioned, placing a hand on Meredith's shoulder, wanting to be sure the blonde could handle it. "I can scrub in too?"

"NO, I mean no, I want to do this alone." She replied, staring down at you as she started rolling you down the O.R.

Vic wasn't you. Not a little bit. Sure he felt okay with her but not like with you. Something about it was different.

"So, school went nice, huh?" Victoria smiled, squatting down to your son's fight, ruffling his curls as he smiled as well.

"Yes! Why are you always around my daddy?" Your son had this personality of always asking what his mind was saying, sometimes it satisfied you.

"Oh Well, uhm-" Vic had a small problem with answering these questions that came out of nowhere, maybe because she knew she wasn't you.

Taking in the sight in front of her, she noticed Jackson walking up to her with a confused expression. "Miles? Weren't you staying with your mom, today?"

"No! Vic surprised me at school and she picked me up!" The boy explained with a toothy smile at his dad, while Vic just pursed her lips.

"Y/N was supposed to pick him up, why did you do that?" Jackson asked, getting to start frustrated at her. "She's his mom."

"Why are mad? I wanted you to have some more time with him?" The curly haired woman argued, pointing at the small boy that was holding his dad's hand.

"You move in without asking, Y/N ignores me in here because of you, and now you pick up my son without asking me? I don't want a relationship like that, Vic." The blue eyed man rambled, shoving past the woman, holding his son's hand before a beeping sound went off.

"What's that, daddy?" Your son's voice sounded a little bit confused, staring up at Jackson.

"Aunt Mer is calling me, come on." Jackson bend down, picking up your son as he started walking towards the O.R.

"Aunt Mer!" As your son noticed Meredith standing out of the O.R. Her blonde locks were hidden behind the scrub cap.

"Hey buddy." Meredith smiled, wrapping her arms around the small boy, releasing him after a few second, taking a deep breath, looking at Jackson with nerves.

"What? Something wrong?" Jackson snorted, placing his hand in the pockets of his coat, staring at the blonde woman. "Mer?"

"It's Y/N. The person I just performed surgery on? It was Y/N." This was the moment Meredith Grey slightly broke down, tears flowed down on her cheeks. "She was in a car accident, I wasn't supposed to tell you."

Jackson shook his head at her, walking towards the wall and leaning his head on it. Watching his son being confused as he bent down.

"Where's mommy?" The little boy gazed up at Meredith and then back to Jackson. "Is she gonna be okay?"

"Yes! She's asleep, but I stopped the little bleeding so now she'll need to rest, but you can see her." Meredith explained, watching both of the persons in front of her, not knowing what to do herself.

"Can i stay with you here? While dad goes to see mom? I'm scared." The boy asked, wrapping his small hand around Mer's.

"Sure, I don't have surgery anytime soon, come on." Meredith softly spoke, walking towards the waiting room, placing a hand on Jackson's shoulder, giving him a nod. "Go and see her, I got him."

Giving her a nod back. The blue eyed surgeon slightly pushed the door of the room open, taking in a breath as he saw you laying.

You were looking out of the window. Doctors and patients passing. Wishing you were out there instead of in this bed.

"I heard." Jackson spoke up, closing the door, as you kept looking out of the window.

"You know, I still care about you and I shouldn't. Because you're happy and I'm good on my own." You spoke, turning your head at him, squinting your eyes.

"I'm not happy, I broke up with Vic." The sentence left his mouth and your heart stopped for a moment. "She's not you, I don't have the special moments with her like I had with you. And my mom won't shut up about you, April even hates me because I was with Vic."

"Oh." That was the word that left your mouth, fiddling with a loose thread from your blanket. "I'm sorry, I guess?"

"No I am, I'm sorry for not being there, for not fighting for what we had, for moving on so fast, for everything." Jackson said, looking you in the eyes, not knowing what else to say. "When you're healed, we can maybe go to Joe's?"

"When I'm healed." You replied, pulling up the corners of your mouth.

[hotchley]

i’m not bulletproof

Jesus Christ why am I so dramatic? Okay, my laptop is very close to dying, so I am cross-posting this, hotchner’s hoodie and the waiting game, then I will be gone... until tonight

Umm... yeah. This was my second fic. It’s literally for my pinned because I’m dramatic </3

Trigger Warnings: referenced child abuse, canon-typical violence, violence towards children and references to child deaths, suicide

read on ao3!

It started, not with a case, but with an argument. 

Jack wanted to go to a party. Hotch said no. He said no because it wasn’t safe, and the party was taking place on a school night, which meant Jack had to be in bed by ten at the absolute latest. He had hoped that by calmly and softly explaining his reasons for not letting Jack go, his son would understand why he was being told no and accept it with the same grace and dignity that he accepted most things in life.

Unfortunately, his son was a hormonal teenager muddling their way through puberty. And instead of accepting he couldn’t go, he kept pressing and asking why. On the third day of being asked, Hotch got irritated and raised his voice slightly, it became an argument.

“I just don’t understand why you never let me do anything,” Jack complained.

Hotch looked up from the budget report. He hadn’t wanted to bring work home- a remnant of the life he had once shared with Haley, but it needed to be done and he had wanted to spend time with Jack. With hindsight, it probably would’ve been better to stay at the office and let him stay with Jessica to calm down.

“I let you do plenty of things that aren’t irresponsible or dangerous Jack,” he replied calmly.

“But this party isn’t going to be irresponsible or dangerous, it’s just a bunch of teenagers. And doesn’t it count for something that I told you about it? I could’ve just snuck out the house and let you wonder where I’d gone,” Jack said, wildly gesticulating. 

He closed the file. “I appreciate you telling me, but my answer is no. You may be responsible, but not everyone is. I don’t want you being exposed to drugs and alcohol before you’re old enough to understand the effects it has on you.”

“You let me be exposed to death before I was old enough to understand what it meant,” Jack spat.

Hotch paled, all the blood leaving his body and turning him into a frozen statue, unable to move as the memory of Haley’s dark hair- of course it was dark, she’d gone into witness protection- spread out on the carpet like a halo and her eyes, still open but almost like the glass eyes of those dolls from that one case, haunted his memory.

“What?”  his voice was soft, dangerously calm.

Jack crossed his arms over his chest. “You heard me. You’re telling me I can’t go to a party, but I was just down the hall when mom died because of you. I’m not a little kid anymore, and you can’t protect me from anything anymore.”

“I can still protect you from some things,” he whispered, not making eye contact. The colours of the folder started to blur together as his eyes filled with tears. It was a morbid thought, but Jack’s words felt like the thorns his mother would throw in his side when she was angry at her husband and needed to let go of the pain.

“Well maybe I don’t want you to.”

“Jack, I’m still your father.”

“Are you? You’re never home at a normal time, you don’t know who any of my friends are, you always go on cases and leave me with Aunt Jess. Mom died because of you and your stupid profiling, but you still always answer when Miss Jareau phones, and you still go all around the country like I don’t even matter.”

“Of course you matter to me Jack. I love you more than anything in this world. But a profiler who catches the bad guys is who I am and-”

“I’m not five years old anymore. You’re not a superhero. You’re just the man that got my mom pregnant and sometimes makes me mac and cheese for dinner.”

Jack stormed off to his room before Hotch could say another word. He didn’t go after him, knowing that was the last thing his son would want. Rationale told him Jack didn’t mean a word of what he had said, that he was just angry and hurt, but he couldn’t help but wonder if it was all true. Of course Jack knew how to hurt him, what child didn’t know what would upset their parents, but he was also right.

He wanted to go and hold his son, to let him go to the stupid party and tell him he would stop being a profiler, but he couldn’t. He felt frozen in place, unable to do anything more than bury his head in his hands and wonder where he fucked up. 

Somehow he managed to get up and make them both something to eat- he went for stir fry instead of mac and cheese- before he went up to Jack’s room and knocked on the door.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” came the muffled response.

“I know you don’t. And I won’t make you.” I’m not your paternal grandfather, he thought. I won’t kick the door in and grab you by the back of your neck because you ran away. “I won’t let you starve though. Dinner is outside the door.”

“I’m not hungry.”

Hotch sighed. “Jack, please. I don’t want you to be angry at me.”

“And I want a real parent. We can’t always get what we want- isn’t that what you always say to me?”

Hotch had to step back, press a hand to the wall to stop himself from falling to his knees and crying. He wanted to tell Jack that wasn’t the way to speak to anyone, especially not an adult, but the words got lodged in his throat and he couldn’t speak, too scared of shouting or repeating the words his father had used the one time he had tried to fight back.

“I know,” he said instead, and walked back to the dining room. He pushed the plate he had set down away. 

His work phone lit up with Dave’s name. He answered.

“Hotchner.”

“Is everything okay? JJ tried phoning you but apparently you didn’t answer all three times. She thought you were with me, and when I said you weren’t, everyone got a bit panicked. In fact Morgan is on his way right now.”

Hotch felt bad for making everyone worry, especially given what had happened last time he hadn’t answered his phone and they had gone and looked for him. “I’m sorry. Everything’s fine. Do we have a case?”

He cursed himself for being stupid. Dave wouldn’t call if they didn’t have a case, even if all he wanted was for that to happen. For Dave to call once they had both gone home, just because he wanted to talk about something random.

“Yeah. It’s bad. Three kids have already been buried, fourth was reported missing twenty minutes ago. JJ will brief us on the jet. Morgan said he’s going to pick you up.”

Hotch was not stupid. He knew why Dave had said buried instead of killed. And whilst he hated the coddling, he couldn’t help but appreciate that he never needed to speak when it was Dave.

“Okay. How far away is he? I need to call Jess.”

“Garcia said ten minutes. She’s coming with us by the way.”

“Thank you.”

“Aaron. Are you sure you’re okay?”

Hotch ignored the warm feeling that came whenever Dave said his first name. “I’m fine. I promise.” He hung up before his answer could be profiled.

He had a short, polite conversation with Jess, then went to Jack’s room. He knocked to the theme of Harry Potter- Jack’s new favourite book series, courtesy of Reid. Whenever Jack saw Spencer, he came home with a glint in his eyes and a whole new shelf worth of books. And when Hotch went to chastise Reid for spoiling his son, Reid would give him the happy puppy eyes and he would relent.

“Let me guess. Aunt Jess will be here in twenty minutes, and you’ll call everyday. And you’ll hopefully be back as soon as possible.”

“I’m sorry buddy.”

“Don’t go then.”

“I don’t have a choice.”

“Then don’t apologise.”

He didn’t have a response for that. Instead, he headed to his own room to change. He entered the code to the safe- the day Jack was born, the month he was born, the year Haley was born and holstered his weapons. 

Before he left, he tried to say goodbye to Jack properly. The bedroom door was locked.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he said. The only acknowledgement he received was a grunt.

Morgan texted, saying he was outside. Hotch sighed, schooled his features into a somewhat neutral expression and headed down to meet him. 

“Thanks for picking me up,” he said, once they had started driving.

“No problem. I have to ask, why didn’t you answer?” Morgan responded. “And you know I don’t want to pressure you to talk or anything like that, but everyone was really scared. We thought something had happened. I mean, Rossi was ready to get everyone from the FBI to look for you.”

His stomach twisted. They weren’t meant to worry about him. “I’m sorry. I was with Jack.” It wasn’t a lie. And Morgan was respectful enough to not profile the truth.

They rode the rest of the way in silence. 

“We’re heading to Boston,” JJ said, once they boarded the jet.

Hotch nodded, taking the file from her, ignoring the sick feeling in his stomach. Boston. One of those places he would never not associate with terror, blood and death. Just like Georgia. And Milwaukee.

“Over the past three months, three teen boys have gone missing from three different cities. They’re all pretty similar in appearance, all come from pretty similar backgrounds. All were found in their local parks. No evidence of torture or sexual assault. The only reason anyone made the connection was because of a conference, where two of the detectives spoke and realised something was up,” JJ explained.

Hotch nodded, feeling nauseous. He wished he had tried to force down some of his dinner. Then he opened the file and was suddenly glad he had skipped his meal.

For when he looked at the pictures, both from the crime scenes and of their smiling faces, all he could see was Jack. Dark blonde hair, light green eyes, wide smiles. He closed his eyes, focused on his breathing and looked back at the files. Focused on the victimology. Teenage boys, but no evidence of sexual assault. Mothers weren’t in the picture, either they had passed away or not received custody after the divorce. The fathers were all in high pressure jobs, most of them spending more time at the office than at home.

“Excuse me,” he said to no one in particular, heading to the toilet.

JJ gave him a concerned look but let him go without a word. 

To keep up appearances, he flushed the toilet and let the tap run to make it seem like he had actually gone to the toilet, as opposed to stare at his own reflection- tired, old, broken, absent father- and remind himself to maintain some sort of control.

Rossi was stood on the other side of the door.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

Hotch nodded, ignoring the taste of bile in his mouth. He didn’t want Rossi to worry about him. He didn’t want anyone worrying about him, but especially not his best friend. Because every time he did, it only served as a reminder of everything he wanted but couldn’t have. The day he realised he loved Rossi had been terrifying, for a number of reasons. He had told Haley by accident, and she had laughed and said he was probably the last one to realise. She had told him to go for it, but he had been a coward and refused. It was another broken promise he had made to her. 

“Are you sure? Because you don’t look great. And you sounded distant on the phone.”

“I’m fine. It’s just a thing with Jack,” he confessed.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. I want to get to Boston and solve the case.”

He walked away, unable to stand the look in Dave’s eyes.

Things went from bad to worse when they landed. Hotch had gone with JJ to set up in the field office, only to find out that all four dads were already there and ready to give whatever information they needed to help the investigation. And with JJ talking to the detectives about how to handle the media, he was tasked with speaking to each of them.

He ignored the looks the officers gave him when he asked to speak to them in a conference room instead of an interrogation room. He knew none of them were responsible. 

After speaking to each of them, and promising to do his best to find the person that had taken their children from them, and bring the last one back home safely, he felt a pit in his stomach and a migraine starting to form. He had no idea when he had last eaten, or drunk anything, but he also knew he couldn’t handle anything.

Talking to the parents had made it almost impossible to remain professional. He saw himself in each of the fathers. They had all been working when their sons were younger, never fully prepared to tackle fatherhood alone. They had all argued with their sons just minutes before they were taken. When Hotch asked them how they felt after they argued, they all responded with some version of the word bad. When he asked why, all parents argue, they told him they felt like their own parents. It had been like staring at a mirror.

“My son died thinking I hated him,” the third parent had whispered. “What kind of person does that make me?”

Hotch softened his gaze and his tone, clearing his throat before he replied. “Your son didn’t die thinking you hated him. You’re nothing like your own father. All children argue with their parents. He knew you loved him and you cannot blame yourself for what happened. We’ll find the man who did this and bring him to justice.”

The man had just nodded before leaving. 

Hotch left the conference room, and was greeted by Rossi.

“Dave. I thought you were still at the M.E’s office.”

“We finished up there. You should listen to your own advice every once in a while.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, already brushing past him to go and talk to Prentiss about what they found at the last crime scene.

“Jack doesn’t hate you. No matter what he may say.”

Hotch turned, ready for an argument, when Rossi raised his hands in surrender.

“I didn’t profile you. But I am your friend. And the only thing that would make you this tense would be something with Jack.”

“Now is not the time to talk about it,” he hissed.

There hadn’t been any DNA found on the scene, which meant they only had a profile to go on. After a quick dinner, that he didn’t really eat, Hotch told everyone there was nothing more to do, and even if there was, they were all exhausted. Rather reluctantly, everyone headed back to the hotel, where it immediately became clear they would be doubling up.

“We can have a girl’s night!” Garcia exclaimed.

JJ and Prentiss laughed, but took the middle room, which for some unknown but helpful reason had three beds.

“Come on pretty boy, you can tell me all about that book you read on the way here,” Morgan said.

Reid’s eyes lit up. “Really?”

Morgan nodded, taking the cards and slinging an arm around Reid’s shoulder. Before they left, Hotch called out for him.

“Thank you,” he whispered.

“We forgot his birthday. Listening to him is the least I could do.”

“Not just for that. Thank you for coming to check up on me as well.”

“Hotch, you may be a drill sergeant, but you’re still my friend. And JJ may have yelled at me after she found out what I said to you about trusting people. We’re cool man.”

He nodded. “Go, Reid’s practically exploding with excitement.”

“You going to stand there watching them all night, or are you going to get some well-deserved sleep?” Rossi teased, suddenly behind him and pressing a card into his hand.

“You seem awfully chipper for someone who hates sharing a room,” he said as they went to the elevator.

“I don’t mind when it’s you,” Rossi said.

Hotch blushed, ignoring the way the words made him feel, ignoring the look in Rossi’s eyes that left no room for doubt, ignoring the way his heart sped up and the lack of space between them as they were crammed into a tiny elevator. 

They both dropped their bags down. Hotch immediately sat on the bed, knowing Dave would want to shower before he went to sleep. He smiled as his friend- because that was all he was, all he would ever be- left and opened up the case file. Yes, he had told everyone to go to sleep, but something was bugging him.

“You can at least loosen your tie,” Rossi teased from the doorway after he had showered.

Hotch turned and felt his throat go dry. He was only wearing a towel, hair still dripping. “I- what?”

“Tie. Loosen it. Actually, better yet, take it off. Go for a five minute shower. And then sleep.”

“Rossi, I can’t.”

“You can and you will. Don’t make me phone Jess and put Jack on the line.”

That convinced him to get a move on, but not for the reason Dave was smirking at. 

There was so much blood everywhere, but he couldn’t work out where it was coming from. He couldn’t move. He was completely trapped, the weight of a body on top of his. There was a flash of something silver and then so much pain. He couldn’t show any fear, but the pain, oh the pain, it was so overwhelming that he couldn’t help but scream. All that existed in the broken home of his mind was that pain and the fear and the terror and that sudden, blood-curdling, chilling realisation that this was how things ended; this was how he was going to die. But someone was calling his name, who would be calling his name that urgently, Haley had Jack and-

“Aaron!” Dave yelled.

Hotch’s eyes flew open and he tried to kick the duvet away, only to find himself tangled in amongst the sheets and blanket and why couldn’t he move, why was it so dark, who was touching him, where was Jack- he was working the case, he needed to save him-

“Aaron, it’s Dave. You’re in a hotel room in Boston for a case. Jessica is at your apartment with Jack. Breathe with me.”

“Dave,” he whimpered.

“That’s right. That’s good. Just keep breathing. It was just a nightmare.”

“M’sorry for waking you up,” he murmured, clinging to Dave’s t-shirt like a lifeline.

“Nonsense Aaron. We all have nightmares. Remember what I told you all those years ago?”

He did. It had been the first case he had worked with the BAU that had involved victims of abuse. He and Dave had been sharing a room when Hotch had the first of many nightmares involving cases. Dave had woken him up, given him a glass of water and told him the nightmares reminded him he was human, that he felt, and however scary they were, however the case ended, they had done their best. There was nothing to be ashamed of. 

“Yeah. That if I have a nightmare, I should remind myself of the people that love me and of all the good things I’ve done.”

“Good. So let me start off that list for you, because it’s a very long one. Jack.”

Hotch snorted. “He hates me. I told him he couldn’t go to a party because he’s not old enough and he said I wasn’t really his dad and that it was all my fault Haley was dead. I dreamt about him you know? Foyet. But it’s been two and a half years, I should be over this, shouldn’t I?”

“You’ve always been open with Jack. He knows what will hurt you, and that’s why he said those things. He’s angry. But he loves you. And as for Foyet? He stabbed you nine times. He killed your wife. You don’t ever have to move on, not if you don’t want to. But you have to learn to cope. Let us help you cope. Let me. I’m your friend.”

There was that word again. Friend. He hated it. He didn’t want Rossi to be his friend, not anymore, but how was he ever supposed to look him in the eye and confess that? It would ruin everything. Rossi would probably tell Strauss, who would fire him, and then he would have nothing. 

“Yeah,” he ended up saying.

“Besides, every parent bans their child from doing something. At least you haven’t told him he isn’t allowed to date until he’s thirty or explore his sexuality. And don’t give me that look, you know you would be okay so long as they were a good person and he was sixteen and being safe.”

“I guess.”

Rossi patted his shoulder and Hotch didn’t even try and pretend that the touch hadn’t made him tingle. It had been so long since someone had touched him- it was always him hugging Jack or touching his shoulder. He thought of that time Reid had talked about being touch-starved. Was he touch-starved, or was he just an adult with a schoolboy crush?

He laid awake for the rest of the night, unable to do much more than close his eyes for a few moments.

They found the unsub the next day. And they bought the boy home safely. But Hotch couldn’t find it in him to be happy at another case solved. Because it hadn’t been successfully, not completely. The unsub- a man in his mid-forties- had been abused. And when he saw those children, who argued with their fathers over something trivial, he had snapped. He’d wanted to save them from his own fate. When Hotch tried to explain that the fathers weren’t bad people, that the children didn’t deserve to die, he hadn’t listened. When he tried to relate, the unsub realised what had happened. And seeing no other way out, he’d turned the gun away from Hotch and to himself.

Hotch couldn’t help but shout no as the bullet released.

“Strauss approved us staying for one more night,” Rossi said when they got back to the hotel.

“That was nice of her,” JJ said.

“God, I need a drink,” Prentiss complained.

“We should all go for a night out. It’ll be fun. And I’m here for once, so I can’t even complain about missing out,” Garcia said.

“That’ll be nice. Reid, you’re coming, no excuses,” Morgan said.

Reid shrugged. “Sure, why not. I’ll remember every embarrassing thing you do, so just be warned.”

Everyone turned to Hotch.

“Come on sir,” Garcia pleaded.

“I shouldn’t,” he said.

“Hotch, if they’re making me go, then you have to come,” Reid replied.

“It’s one night Aaron. And you’re not a newbie anymore,” Dave said, placing a hand on his lower back to steer him away from the elevator.

He blushed, both at the incident that was being referenced and the placement of Rossi’s hand. 

“I’ll go if you don’t bring that up,” he reasoned.

Rossi nodded. Everyone else looked curious, but Hotch shot them all his famous glare, with a small smile to soften the blow. And then they left, still in the same clothes they had been wearing as they had packed up at the station.

Hotch had made it a rule that he didn’t get drunk in front of colleagues. He’d drink enough alcohol to keep them off his back, but he wouldn’t allow himself to become even slightly intoxicated when they were present.

Some cases made all the rules go out the window. It was the only defence he had for getting absolutely shit-faced.

At some point he had loosened his tie, so he didn’t really understand why Rossi was complaining so much as he pulled him into their room and started complaining about the way he dressed.

“If Garcia can come on a case wearing a cat-ear hairband, I don’t understand why you need to always need to wear a suit,” he complained after he got the shoes off.

Hotch grinned. “It’s like my superhero costume. It protects me from people finding out who I really am.”

“Wow you really are drunk.”

“Is it bad that I’m drunk? I told Jack he couldn’t go the party because of the alcohol and he said I was being stupid. Maybe he’s right. I am stupid.”

“Why can’t you ever just stick to being a happy drunk? Why must you always go from happy to crying?”

“Are you mad at me too? I don’t want you to be mad at me. I care about you too much. I don’t think I could stand it if you were mad at me. Not when Jack’s mad at me- did I tell you about that? I think I did. He’s mad at me, Haley would be mad at me if she could see me now, so I can’t have you being mad as well.”

“Haley wouldn’t be mad at you.”

“You’re wrong. She would.”

“Oh, really. Why?”

“Cos I told her I liked this person and she told me to go for it but I was too scared of being rejected and ruining the team that I didn’t. At least, that was I told her, which is the other reason she’d be mad. I semi-lied. I was scared of rejection and ruining the team, but I was more scared that they’d be like my father. He caught me with a boy once. Only once. I was too scared after that. It’s stupid though, this person is as far from my father as you could get.”

At the mention of the person, Hotch went back to being happy. Rossi smiled, still wrestling with the suit jacket, unwilling to make his friend move his arms lest he break the spell and made that smile vanish.

“You going to tell me about them or do I have to profile it out of you?”

“Wouldn’t do that,” he slurred. “Too nice to. Unlike Gideon. Gideon never followed the rules. But you- you may be a pain in the ass, but you follow the rules that matter like not profiling us and not pushing and not using our pasts to get to an unsub.”

Rossi snorted. “Thanks Aaron. It’s nice to know I’m not like Gideon.”

“Be weird if you were.”

“Why’s that?” he had got the jacket and the tie off. He untucked the shirt and unbuttoned the top one, knowing Hotch wouldn’t want any more than that done. 

“Cos I love you. I love your stupid notebook and your Italian cooking and your don’t-be-stupid voice and your stupid face and how you’re always nice to me, even when I’m being stupid. I love you Rossi, and I wish you’d love me too, even though I’m a mess who-” the rest of his sentence was cut off by a yawn.

Rossi had no idea what to say. He’d never come out to the team because there had never been a need to. Yes, he had three ex-wives, and only wives, but that was because he hadn’t been able to marry any of the men he dated, and times had been different then. He hadn’t wanted a long-term thing with any of them.

But now, Aaron was drunk and confessing his love, and it occurred to him that he did love the younger man. He had just never realised.

“I’m a mess who can’t get the voice of their father out of their head long enough to ask you out on a date,” he murmured, falling back onto the pillow.

Rossi opened his mouth, but Hotch was already asleep. He sighed, brushed the hair off his forehead and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. “Sleep well.”

The morning came, and with it, a pounding head.

Hotch woke up with a groan, immediately pressing his hand to his temple. 

“There’s aspirin and a glass of water on the night stand,” Rossi said.

Hotch blinked the sleep out of his eyes. “Wha- why do I need it? What happened?”

Rossi stopped, his coffee halfway to his mouth. Hotch looked away. Not the time.

“How much of last night do you remember?”

“We went to the bar. I- oh. I drank far too much. I’m sorry. Had the others gone by then?”

“No, but they all agreed to spare you the shame and not mention it. Do you remember anything else that happened?”

“You were the one to bring me back. And after that it’s all a bit hazy.”

“Do you want to try and remember or do you want me to tell you?”

Hotch paled. “What did I do?”

“You told me you loved me.”

Hotch fell off the bed trying to scramble away. He noticed that Rossi had left him in his clothes, thank goodness for small mercies, but the sheet got tangled in his legs. Rossi stood as he managed to stand up, his head still pounding and the light making his vision hazy.

He felt a hand on his arm and managed to force it off. “Just let me go, Dave, please.”

“No. We need to talk about this.”

“What is there to say? I told you I love you. But you’re this amazing, caring, funny, handsome straight person and I’m me. Please just let me go. I’ll file my transfer when we get back, but I can’t be here and watch as you reject me,” he said, walking towards the door.

“Aaron. Stop.” 

He froze. Rossi had never bossed him around, even when he’d been the newest profiler that was still learning the ropes. But god, there was something about his tone that made him want to fall to his knees and do whatever he wanted. He’d been still for too long, Rossi would have realised too.

“Turn around and look at me.”

Aaron wanted to resist, wanted to run out the door and never come back, but something in him- probably the part of his brain that was self-destructive- made him turn back. And the sight that greeted him made his heart stop all over again. Rossi didn’t look angry or upset. He didn’t look like he was about to hurt him or force him to explain why he was such a coward.

He looked happy.

“I don’t understand, why are you smiling at me?” he whispered.

“Because I love you too. I just never realised until last night when you were drunk out of your mind, terrified that I was going to reject you, that I realised all I wanted was to hold you against me, listen to the steady beat of your heart to remind myself that you were still here and never let you go.”

Before he could even process what was happening, Aaron had crossed the short distance of the room and had buried his head in his shoulder. Hesitantly, Rossi bought his arms around the younger man in an awkward hug.

“I don’t know how to do this,” Aaron confessed, staring at him with dark brown eyes, still full of the fear of rejection. 

“We can work it out together.”

“I don’t know how to get over my fear, or tell Jack and the team- and what are we even supposed to tell Strauss, she’ll fire both of us and what about all the other things, like dates and the romantic things,” he rambled.

Rossi pressed a finger to his lips. “We’ll work it out. But that’s not the concern for right now.”

“Then what is?”

“Can I kiss you?”

Hotch nodded, suddenly feeling shy. “I’ve only ever kissed Haley. I doubt I’ll be any good.”

“I don’t want good. I want you.”

Without another word, Rossi placed his fingers under Aaron’s chin and tilted his head up. It was a chaste kiss, barely more than a brush of lips, but Aaron felt his heart speed up and fireworks explode behind his eyes. This. This is what he had always wanted but never had the courage to ask for, and now he had it and he just felt… good.

“We need to brush our teeth,” he decided once Rossi pulled away.

“Agreed.”

“Dave, what are we now? Because boyfriend seems immature, and I plan on telling Jack and the team as soon as possible so don’t even try and suggest lover. And other half is stupid, we’re both whole people without each other.”

“I’d like to think of you as my partner. That’s what we started out as- don’t give me that look you know I’m right- and it’ll always fit us. You the workaholic drill sergeant and me, the agent turned author turned agent-author with three ex-wives.”

Aaron laughed. “I have no idea how that makes any sense but okay. Partners. I like that.”

“It makes sense because it shows that we’re both adults that can depend on each other no matter what happens.”

“No matter what happens,” Hotch echoed.

It was going to be a long journey to undo all the damage his father had done, but he was willing to work through it. He was willing to do whatever it took to let him spend the rest of his life beside the man he could now call a partner.

The team essentially worked it out the moment they got on the jet. JJ just shook her head fondly, Reid smiled and told them that if they needed any advice he was there, Morgan smiled and patted Rossi, claiming he had his work cut out for him, Prentiss actually hugged Hotch with tears in her eyes and Garcia squealed and told them she was going to knit them matching scarves.

It was nice. Unfamiliar and different and scary, but nice. Rossi sat beside him, close enough so their shoulders brushed every time one of them adjusted the way they were sat. Every time it happened, Aaron smiled and blushed a little.

When they arrived back at Quantico, everyone at lot happier than they had been at the end of the case, there was an unfamiliar car in the lot. 

“I haven’t seen that one before,” Reid commented.

“It’s probably just someone for Strauss. Let’s go, write the reports and go home,” Hotch said.

“Home. Sounds nice,” Rossi said.

Hotch went pink as Garcia cackled.

Since Emily’s return, it had become tradition for Garcia to sit with them in the bullpen as they did their reports, mainly to annoy them, and if she had accompanied them, to do her own report as she only managed to do them on the job when she was on base. They all headed to the sixth floor, everyone looking forward to the few days of down time they would have once they finished their reports.

It was still early- or was it late- enough for them to be the only people in the building. As everybody else set themselves up in the bullpen, Hotch and Rossi went up to their respective offices, Morgan still talking to Reid and Garcia about something. When Hotch walked into his office, putting his bag down with unnecessary force, Rossi winced.

“What’s going on?”

Hotch bit down the urge to say nothing. “Jack still doesn’t want to talk to me.”

“Why don’t you try phoning Jessica then? Maybe he’ll change his mind once he realises just how much you’re willing to sacrifice for him.”

“Maybe.”

“And I know Morgan drove you in, so once you’re paperwork is done, you’re coming home with me. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, but this case must have hit close to home. I’m dating you now, which means I’ve signed up for the good, the bad and the ugly. I’m sure Jess would love to spend more time with Jack anyways.”

He knew trying to fight was a bad idea, and the thought of going home to an angry and hurt Jack was almost too much to bear. Did it make him a bad parent? Maybe. But he was tired and he wanted to give Jack space.

“I’ll give you some privacy to phone him then.” 

Hotch managed a weak smile, then dialled his home number. Jessica answered almost immediately. She sounded like she hadn’t slept and he wondered why he thought phoning her at three in the morning was a good idea.

“Hi Jess. I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking. It was a bad case that’s all. I should let you sleep. I’ll be back in the morning, well later in the morning so you can go once you’ve had breakfast if you need to do anything.”

She laughed, and his chest tightened. Her and Haley had been nothing alike, but when they laughed, it was like they were the same person. “It’s okay. I’ll stay for the whole day and let you get some rest. Jack, what are you doing up? Okay, get your water and then back to- actually do you want to talk to your dad?”

He heard Jack say no. Jessica made a few uncomfortable sounds.

“Jess, it’s okay. He doesn’t have to talk to me if he doesn’t want to. I get it.” He got that he was a useless father, that Jack had every reason to hate him and he didn’t understand why it had taken so long for him to start. He understood that he had failed to protect Jack and Haley, and that nothing he did now was going to ever make up for it.

“Are you sure? He’s gone back to his room but I doubt he’s sleeping. I can talk to him if you want.”

“No, just leave him. He’s allowed to be angry.” Because if you speak to him, you will stop seeing me as the angel Haley loved all through high school. You will stop seeing me as the man who has lost everything and start seeing me as the man who can’t be there when his son needs him, and the man that got your sister killed.

“If you’re sure. But before you go, just listen to me. You’re a good parent. And whatever Jack said, he doesn’t mean. He’s a hormonal teenager going through puberty. He loves you.”

“I know.” But did he really love his father? “I’ll see you in the morning then. Bye Jess.”

“Bye Aaron.”

Aaron. Sometimes he wondered where the lines between Hotchner- god, how he hated his surname, forever tarnished by the memory of his father and everyone in their small town who thought that little Aaron Hotchner was just the quietest little boy, just like his mother yet somehow the spitting image of his father, Hotch: the stoic leader that could be trusted with everything and somehow not collapse and Aaron: absent husband and father, the man that had loved and failed Haley, Kate and even Elle existed. 

Sometimes he just felt like that little boy, curled up in the basement of a house that never felt like home, wishing he could just let go and cry for once. But he couldn’t. Not when he was aware that the team were watching him instead of doing their paperwork.

He finished it in record time, unable to look at the images of smiling teenagers for any longer than was necessary. 

Dave was already waiting for him. Everybody else had gone home.

“Are you ready?” Dave asked.

Hotch nodded, unable to trust his own voice after having to read through everybody’s accounts of the victims, their parents and the unsub.

They drove to Dave’s in silence, Aaron having texted Jessica he was going to a friends but would hopefully back by late afternoon. He wondered again if he had made a mistake by letting Dave in. It would only be a matter of time before he realised Hotch was damaged and nothing in the world would fix it.

“Aaron, we’re here.” The sound of Dave’s voice, suddenly soft and gentle, lured him out of the darkness of his mind.

He got out of the car, still not knowing what to say. He wasn’t like Reid, who would rattle off statistics about any given topic when he was nervous. He wasn’t like Garcia who would keep digging a deeper hole when she was in trouble, or Morgan who managed to charm anyone with a few words.

Dave’s house, despite its size, had always felt homely. When staring at the wall where the bullet hole had been did more harm than good- and who was he kidding, that had been every time he’d sat there, surrounded by files- Dave’s house had always been a safe haven for him.

“I’m going to make some light breakfast and then try and get some sleep. Do you want anything? And don’t say coffee, I’m not letting you do anymore work until you get some rest.”

He shook his head, already sat on the couch.

Dave sighed, but he didn’t push the issue. Before he could leave, Aaron turned to face him.

“Dave?”

“Yes?” he was already in the doorway, minutely turning to see him properly.

“I’m having a bad day,” he whispered.

Rossi froze. Aaron Hotchner did not admit that easily. Only to him. Only when he was moments away from falling apart. He did not know whether to consider it a blessing or a curse that he was the only one trusted enough to piece him back together. He did not know whether or not he could do it this time. Things were different. He had only ever had to do this as a friend, or as a colleague. Never as partners- and wasn’t that ironic, he was the one to suggest the label but now it didn’t seem significant enough.

He walked back over, sat beside Aaron. Close enough so their feet- Hotch hadn’t even taken his shoes off- brushed, but far enough to let him move away if he wanted. He didn’t. He shifted closer, resting his head on Dave’s shoulder. Dave raised one hand to gently stroke his messy hair. 

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“I’m meant too, aren’t I? Haley always used to say there was no point in being together if I was just going to hide from her every time I had a bad day. I know she was right, but I just don’t know how to talk about it. It’s stupid anyways.”

“Don’t do this. Don’t act like your problems aren’t as important because you’re supposed to be an alpha male. That’s only at work. Here, we’re just Aaron and Dave, two old men who never learned how to communicate properly, so they’re muddling their way through life.”

“I just don’t understand why you’re here. And I’m scared you’re going to leave, just like everyone else. I’m scared that the ghosts of my past are going to be too much for you to handle and that you’ll get tired of waiting for me to be comfortable around you. I’m scared of ruining what we have with my nightmares and scars. I mean, I have a son who’s a teenager now. You never even wanted kids. And I know it’s stupid, but I’m scared I’m never going to be able to repair my relationship with Jack. We’ve never argued before. I don’t know what to do. My father would hit me if I dared speak out of turn. I never learned how to be normal. What if I hurt him?”

He had curled into a ball, his legs pressed against Dave’s stomach. His voice had started shaking, and Dave felt a wet patch forming on his shirt.

“I won’t leave you, ever. We’re going to have problems, but I won’t leave, and I will spend the rest of my life waiting for you to be comfortable around me if I need to. I have nightmares as well, we can keep each other up. I love Jack and he loves you too. I have no idea how to be a parent, but you do. You would never hurt him. And I’m sure Jessica has already told you this, but he’s a teenager. You’ll know what to do when you see him. If you don’t, just ask him. He wants to be there for you.”

“Thanks Dave.”

“I love you Aaron. You never need to thank me. Now move off of me so I can take you to bed. You need a good night’s rest.”

He obeyed. Neither of them were about to believe Dave was strong enough to carry a fully-grown man to bed, so Hotch forced himself to stand and let Dave lead him to the master bedroom.

“You’re practically asleep already. I’m glad. Would you let me undress you?”

Hotch hesitated, but nodded almost imperceptibly. “Yes,” he whispered.

“I’m so proud of you. If you want me to stop, just say the word and I will.”

He started shaking as Rossi pushed his shirt off his shoulders, the final layer of armour stripped away from him. He closed his eyes, the tremors only stopping when Rossi pressed their foreheads together.

“You survived. You survived them both. And there will be more, there always is, but I will be here to catch you. Believe that.”

Aaron nodded, tears falling onto the duvet. He couldn’t express how glad he was that Dave wasn’t spouting some bullshit about how the scars on his torso and the lines on his back made him even more beautiful. He didn’t know how to say that though, which he was coming to realise the beauty of their relationship: they just knew.

Rossi was tucking him, having successfully changed him into pyjamas without any incidents when he realised he needed to address something from earlier.

“You’re wrong, you know that right?”

Rossi laughed. “About what?”

“Earlier. You said you don’t know how to be a parent. You do. I see it in the way you tease Morgan, curse at Prentiss in Italian, protect Garcia and JJ, listen to Reid and the way you treat Jack and Henry.”

“Get some sleep. I’ll be here when you wake up.” He pressed a kiss to the other man’s cheek, then left. There was one more thing he needed to do.

Aaron awoke when he heard voices. It took a moment for him to realise where he was, but when he did, he smiled. Dave hadn’t left. He left the room, trying to find the source of the voices. The search led him to the same couch where he had started crying only a few hours ago.

“Jack!” he exclaimed. 

Jack launched himself into his father’s arms. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so, sorry. I shouldn’t have said any of that stuff, it isn’t true and I love you. I won’t go to the stupid party I swear but please don’t be sad. Uncle Dave told me the censored version of your case. He also told me that you two are partners and I’m really happy about that because he’s cool and I have a vague memory of mom saying you were silly for thinking he didn’t like you-”

“Buddy, it’s okay. Sometimes people argue. I still love you too. And yes, Dave and I are together now but you’re still my first priority. You always will be. So if you need me to take less cases or spend more time at home, then just tell me. We don’t need to let it explode like that.”

Jack looked sheepish. “I didn’t want to be a burden.”

“You’re my son. You’ll never be a burden to me.”

“Do you promise?” He looked so much like that little boy who believed his father was a real superhero that Hotch could only nod his affirmation.

“Will you stay for breakfast? Jessica dropped Jack here, but she said she’d go to give us some time alone and apparently he only ate a single piece of toast,” Rossi asked, almost nervously.

“Please can we do that?” Jack added.

Hotch nodded, letting go of his son. “Did you want any help?”

“No. Just go sit at the dining table and look pretty whilst you talk to your son,” Dave said.

Hotch flushed but obeyed.

Dave watched as Jack launched into a conversation about the pretty girl in his class and the tension Aaron had been carrying for far too long finally bled off his shoulders and saw as he went from FBI agent to loving father, eyes crinkling as he finally, genuinely, laughed.

There would be bad days. There would be arguments and reckless endangerment. There would be ghosts that would never leave them and fears that couldn’t be destroyed. But Aaron was smiling. And for one David Rossi, that was enough.