#mom said it's my turn to have an existential crisis!

[real-life-cloud]

:(

[sadlynotthevoid]

If I had a nickel for everytime I dreamed that Lily was kidnapped and Og!Cale ran looking out for her, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice.

In the first one, Lily got kidnapped in the Capital and og!Cale instantly started running around, doing detective work but also really in panic. At some point he figured out who could have a hint on Lily's kidnapper, but the person in question was in the castle dungeons. So he went and straight entered in a room where Alberu was having a meeting with other nobles, not caring at all who was there, and asked him to sign a permission.

Og!Cale: *opens the door* Your Highness, sign this! *Slams form on the table*

Alberu, who wasn't expecting a random noble to crash his office: ...

The nobles: *shoked in victorian era* ...

Alberu: how did you got here?

Og!Cale: I flew through the third floor entry. It has my mom's name on it. More important, I'm in a hurry. So could you sign it already?

Alberu, confused as fuck because 'wdym by third floor entry? That's just a window': *reads the paper* permission to visit the dungeons? Why do—

Og!Cale, too worried to even keep his trash act and also practically a mind reader (not really): My sister was kidnapped and that guy may know where she could be. As I said, I'm in a hurry.

Alberu: That's terrible. *About to sign it* Is there any other way I can help?

Random noble: Excuse me?! Your Highness, this is not according to the protocol. I had to wait for months after my solicitude was sent to have this meeting. Why does he get a special treatment?!

Og!Cale, without paying an eye: Aren't you that Viscount that keeps wasting big sums on gifts for a mistress? *To Alberu* I guess he's asking money "for his territory". I bet he spent all his budget and is trying to hide it from his wife.

The noble: *pales* That— you— Your Highness, I can explain *faints*

Alberu: *sighs* I'll have someone investigate it. *Signs the form* Is there anything else I need to know?

Og!Cale, already exiting the room with the permission at hand: *tilts head* I've heard that people had been dissapearing in the Southwest region. *Narrows eyes* Huh. It's near the Gyerre territory now that I think about it.

Og!Cale: Anyways, goodbye. *Leaves*

Alberu, absentmindedly: So that's what father meant when he said redheads are "a crazy force of nature that could destroy a little country without force".

Antonio, who happened to be in the meeting: *silently having an existential crisis*

It turned out that the culprit was Og!Cale's past teacher (yes, that guy) who was working with traffickers. He wanted to see whether Og!Cale would resolve his "little game" or he would "lose" (have Lily sold before someone finds them). He also kinda hates her because "he lost his student by her fault" (no, it wasn't her fault. He's just crazy).

Og!Cale found out where Lily was being held and he, along with a pair of knights, went for her. All of them had a fun time beating the creepy bastard.

Then Og!Cale walked to their house carrying Lily on his arms.

In the second one, a monster-like creature broke into Lily's room, took her and flew away. Og!Cale was sitting on his bedroom's window and saw his little sister being taken away by a blurr of mass. He jumped out of the window to follow, of course. Then the knights saw a thing flying over their heads and the young master speedruning after it.

Og!Cale: Come back here!

Hillsman: Young master Cale?!

Og!Cale: What are you doing?! Stop that thing! It has Lily!

Knights: Ah! *Start chasing the thing too*

I don't know what happened next because I woke up.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

June 20th

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1. Hi! I would really appreciate some help yo find two fics!

A) The first was a fic in which LZ is a concertist (maybe violin or cello?) And was going home after a concert when it starts to rain and he goes into a book store, where Wen Qing works, and behind the book store there is a coffee shop, LZ sits near the bar and interacts a little w a-yuan, then WY plays a song and LZ finds his passion for music again or something like that. I don't quite remember the rest

B) the second one was one in which, during seclusion(? LZ finds a book his mom wrote that had gardening tips inside, so he starts tending to the garden however he can without being able to leave his house. Eventually he discovers that the book isn't just about gardening but instead about a different kind of cultivation involving plants, and that with it he might be able to bring back WY. He works hard on it and is eventually able to do it. I don't quite remember the other details @katt-patt

1A)

FOUND! for you, andante by xuanxuanwo (ostentatiouslyrealistic) (T, 35k, WangXian, Modern AU, Music, Musicians, Pianist LWJ, Guitarist WWX, Kid Fic, Coffee Shops, Bookstores, Existential Crisis, Unrelated JGY & QS, Friendship, Romance, Light Angst, Happy Ending)

1B)

FOUND! From my heart's ground. by orange_crushed (E, 37k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Grief/Mourning, Corporal Punishment, Canon-Typical ViolenceVomiting, Injury Recovery, Trauma, Blood Magic, Elemental Magic, Gardens & Gardening, Resurrection, Dissociation, First Time, Oral Sex, Language of Flowers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cultivation......... Literally, Arson, Self-Harm, Self-Harm for Blood Magic Reasons, Suicidal Thoughts, Spiritual Coma, Brief Reference to Temporary Incontinence as a Result of Said Coma, Self-Esteem Issues)

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2. Ok I’ve been avoiding doing this bc it feels rude to ask for pwp (not rude at all! We take all types of asks ^^ - Mod C) so you can ignore this if you want, but I’ve been looking for this one fic that was dragon lwj and Fox wwx, in like a magical forest, and I specifically remember a scene where wwx is in heat and everyone knows but he’s just playing with children and messing around near a water source until lwj comes out and finds him and if you can find it for me I will love you forever thank you

FOUND? #2 it's "Budding Chrysanthemum" by Anonymous. Looks like its deleted from ao3 but i have a copy ~imstillthinkingaboutithmm

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3. Hello! I'm looking for this fic where modern!wwx gets sent to the world of mdzs and spends a year there before going back to the modern world. I remember that he was roommates with modern!wq and that during the year he was gone modern!wq and modern!jc put up missing posters for him

FOUND? Wrong Turn, Right Place by diamondbruise (E, 71k, WangXian, Time Travel, kind of, it’s more reality travel but there’s modern wwx and cultivator lwj, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Jealousy, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Misunderstandings, Cultural Differences)

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4. hi!! I love your blog, it has helped me massively in finding fics to read ❤️ This is my first time asking for a fic so I don't know if I'm doing something wrong okay? I'd like to request help in finding a fic...

It was like a time traveler fic with Wangxian where they were saying goodbye to each other as Wei Wuxian left the cloud recesses lectures. It was in Lan Xichen pov.

They were declaring their intent to court each other, LWJ said that he will come with a dizi as his first courting gift. WWX said that he would become a famous cultivator and court LWJ by 22 yrs but then LWJ said 22 yrs is too late and WWX should court him at 19.

Lan Xichen also remarked that WWX gave the Compass of Evil & some other inventions to the lan sect and they would be very fine courtship gifts with the proper presentation

Could you all help me in finding this fic? It was part of a series too

FOUND? Wait, What? by MarbleGlove (G, 1k, WangXian, Time Travel, POV Outsider)

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5. I'm trying to find a fanfic of alternative/time travel ghost Wei Wuxian taking care of Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen, the story takes place after the siege and he somehow ended up in a time just after madam lan's death and finds Lan Wangji in the snow, only Lan Wangji and Lan Xichen can see him, later on he gets Qingheng-Jun out of seclusion (he can see him too it just isn't revealed until later. @samriajack

FOUND! Waiting by Morgana_avalon (G, 46k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, Short Story, LWJ is five year old, LXC is eight year old, LWJ as a boy kneeling in the snow at the jingshi waiting for his mama to return, brothers looking out for each other, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, canon divergent but also canon compliant, Mystery, Mysticism, Chenqing, Bichen, happy endings, The Qilin, Based on the TV-series and not the novel)

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6. Hi I need your help again oh great master of finding fic so I don't remember the name obviously but I know it's a podfic so here's what I remember Madame Lan is alive she was released by uncle Lan and she travel to yiling

And meant little wei ying where he told her his parents' names and then she went and tried to find their bodies and she did find her bodies and then she took their swords for their son and then she traveled with wei ying and this is a serious but it's not complete yet and I'm kind of want to read it but if the podficer is going to pops it all I want to hear it so please help me find it

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7. Hii, okay so this one is kind of harder :(, I am looking for this fic where idek what is going on but what I really do remember is them sleeping together during the indocrination (sounds wrong lol) but what I mean is that everyone is all of a sudden closer and instead of sleeping in the beds the wens gave them and also not do anything, they separated the girls and put up privacy walls using their robes? to give them privacy. I can't remember anything else sorry. @thatperson0-0

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8. Also, for the next FF, I kind of remember reading a fic where WWX was desperate to get somewhere fast and I think they managed to get Li'l Apple to ride a sword? (Probably 2 or 3 swords tandem, a single sword would have to be an FF7 buster sword to fit a donkey.) maybe they carried her? @mreisse

FOUND? Menace by MnemonicMadness (T, 7k, LQR & WWX WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt WWX, BAMF WWX, Downplaying an Injury, awkward comforter LQR, reluctant matchmaker LQR, Humor, Pining WWX, Good Uncle LQR, Self-Sacrificing WWX, POV LQR, LQR is stressed, And also secretly a softie, Post-Canon)

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9. Hi! This is for fic finder. It's modern au where WWX was a chef i think? He worked in restaurant with wen chao. That restaurant was owned by wen ruohan i think. But wen chao did something that makes WWX gets fired. Then near the end of the story i think, LWJ invited WWX to his music performance (not sure about this part. Its either he invited WWX or WWX wants to tell LWJ something). But when WWX arrived, he noticed that the kitchen is a mess. He found out that LWJ hire Jin Zixun as chef because Jin Zixun bothered him too much. And then WWX takes over the kitchen. Thats all i think. Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

#9 is right! I can't open the link so i search for another website and i found it in SquidgeWorldArchive for registered user only

FOUND! i swim in hollow lakes carved from memories by spookykingdomstarlight (T, 154k, WangXian, XiYao, Modern AU, Coffee Shops & Cafés, Music, Baking, Social Media, Misunderstandings, Consequences of Fake Dating Schemes, Flashbacks, Vlogger WWX, Professional Musician LWJ, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mistakes, Pining, Matchmaking, Romance, Illnesses, Slow Burn, Background SangNing, POV Multiple, Second Chances) I think it was wc not jzx who was hired, otherwise matches

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10. hello!!! I'm looking for a fic where WWX falls into a underground cave and encounters a dragon in his disciple era and takes a sword that transform him into a dragon. I really can't remember what happens next, only that he goes on his rogue cultivator arc and later on find LWJ but believes that's his descendants and not LWJ himself. I'm going to keep looking but maybe you are luckier than me and find it first.

FOUND? Our Immortal Blood by Saori (M, 81k, WangXian, Alternate Universe, Temporary Character Death, Minor Character Death, Platonic Relationships, Family Feels, Blood and Injury, Night Hunts, Monsters, Immortality, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Grief/Mourning, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Slow Burn, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Marriage Proposal, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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11. For fic finder: It was a WangXian arranged marriage au. What I remember is that the two did not have sex on their wedding night and this caused a rift. For Wuxian who grew up in Yunmeng culture it was a huge offense that Wangji wouldn’t sleep with him, but Wangji didn’t know this because it was standard practice in the Lan clan not to sleep together (I think the Lans had a designated month or something where they had sex). Basically cultural differences in expectation caused the boys to be uncertain around each other. I think Yanli eventually pulls Xichen aside and scolds him for how the Lan have “slighted” Wuxian this way. 

FOUND? In Love and War by Cataclysmic_Calamity (E, 68k, WangXian, A/B/O Dynamics, Canon Divergence, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Arranged Marriage, Kind of a slow burn, enemies to lovers ish, rampant sexual tension, Miscommunication, past emotional abuse, Dubious Consent, Consensual Non-Consent, Semi-Public Sex, Anal Fingering, Dom/sub, Anal Sex)

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12. Hiya! Looking for fic, I can’t remember much of it but I remember that the Jiang’s leave Wwx at the cloud recesses during the study arc because of there abuse being revealed(?) or something about mistreatment. @candyyii

FOUND? 💖 Hoards and treasuresby  apathyinreverie (T, 21k, WangXian, Siblings, Family, not particularly Jiang friendly, YZY Bashing, slightly darker Gusu Lans, LXC being the best brother, Some manipulation, But with the best of intentions, and   not between wangxian, Dragon LWJ, Fox WWX, Smitten LWJ, Fluff, perfect   happiness, adorable WWX, Romance, Some worldbuilding, courting)

FOUND? 💙 Holding shreds by barisan (T, 5k, WangXian, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, No Sunshot Campaign, Body Swap, Not for sexy shenanigans, Chronic Pain, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Abusive YZY, Bad Parent YZY, Bad Parent JFM, Good Uncle LQR, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Inaccuracies, POV WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, Not Jiāng Family Friendly, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Getting Together, Smart WWX)

FOUND? 🔒 in the shadow of moonlit flowers by Reverie (cl410) (T, 56k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, cloud recesses, NHS & LWJ friendship, developing relationship, LWJ pov, minor injuries, autistic LWJ, implied/referenced child abuse, aka YZY warning, genius WWX, light angst, hurt/comfort, WWX protection squad)

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13. I’ve been looking for this one fic that I just can’t remember much about

I don’t remember how it happens but WWX and LWJ have an arranged marriage (I think or something along this premise) WWX doesn’t want to get married and fights it the entire time but LWJ is steadfast in getting married to WWX. Like WWX tries to come up with so many excuses and LWJ is in love with WWX. I know JC, JFM, JYL, and YZY are all in it.

I remember JFM asking WWX if he really thinks LWJ will mistreat him. WWX says no but still doesn’t want to get married.

It ends with them getting married but WWX still saying he doesn’t want to get married.

It’s a one shot but I think I remember being in a series and having a second part to it. I remember there being art at the end showing them getting married but WWX whining about it.

Im making this sounds kinda angst/non consensual but it’s a comedy pretty sure the whole is just WWX being in denial of his feelings @trashyjen

FOUND?🔒Another Kind of Marriage by Titans_R_Us (T, 1k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, supportive families, Fluff and Crack)

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14. Hi, thank you so much for your great work . For the next fic finder, can you please find me a fic. I don't remember much, just that Lan Zhan takes Wei Ying and the wens and hides them in a secret hidden village. That village is where Lan Wangji's mother's home . Lan Zhan has a maternal grandpa and a cousin, I think Lan Xichen finds out about the place eventually 🤔.

FOUND? pale shadows of forgotten names by Chrononautical (T, 56k, wangxian, Madam Lán Lives, Madam Lán Deserves Better, Good Sibling LXC, Badass LXC, He gets there in the end it just takes a while, Not particularly JGY friendly, Gūsū Lán Sect Rules, Canon-Typical Behavior, Unresolved Sexual Tension, the universal fear of growing up to become one of your parents, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives AU, Except WN but he’s very polite, Arranged Marriage, Forced Marriage, Imprisonment, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, not between wangxian, Drunk LWJ, to lighten the mood, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Traumatized WWX, though he will not admit it, Taking time to heal, canon-typical communication skills)

FOUND? Arbitrary by devinokaze (T, 137k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Post-Sunshot Campaign, Burial Mounds Ensemble as Family, but live somewhere else, hidden society, Not Everyone Dies, POV Multiple)

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15. Hey first of all thank u for doing a great job. You found a lot of the fics I wanted. I'm searching for another fic. It's post canon and wei ying was traveling alone. He meets the juniors on a night hunt and saved them from a beast I think . He gets badly hurt on the stomach and lan Zhan gets there immediately to bring him back to cloud ressesive. Lan zhan nurses him back to health but uncle wants him to leave after he recovers. I hope i can find the fic and thanks in advance @smarti1997

FOUND? A Lot of Edges Called Perhaps by hansbekhart (E, 22k, WangXian, Semi-Public Sex, Public Masturbation, Mutual Masturbation, Anal Sex, Sex in the cold springs, Mutual Pining, Grief/Mourning, Injury Recovery, Ethical Dilemmas, Ethical Edging, and Boners for Justice, It takes a long time for them to bone but they get there, Risk Aware Consensual Patience, Edgeplay sort of, 20K words of sad horniness, Happy Ending, Just the tip but not the way you're thinking) This probably isn't the right one for 15 but A Lot of Edges Called Perhaps is nearly identical to the description but with the roles reversed (Lan Wangji is injured in the stomach and Wei Wuxian takes care of him during his recovery).

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16. hello! I’m looking for a fic that was a modern setting AU and it follows wei ying as a poor teacher I believe( I’m not 100% sure on that, but it’s essential to the plot that he has little money but continues to pay for lan zhan’s services) and one day he stumbles across a website or something and lan zhan is a dom and Wei Yang pays for his service. I’m a big fuzzy on the details but I’m pretty sure there was a spicy scene with the two of them in front of a mirror. And then they continue their sessions and one day they run into each other in a grocery store by wei ying house. Thank you so much for your hard work!!! @bittersweet-loveliness

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17. for the next ficfinder can you help me find this fic? im pretty sure it's called Brothers in Law, where Jiang Chen and Lan Zhan go back in the past, don´t remember much but i think Wen Xu was kinda obssessed with Wei Ying, didn't find it in ao3 but hopefully it wasn't deleted, thxx @omgnuttytale

FOUND! Brother-In-Law’s by Loveable_Psychopath (M, 332k, JYL/JZX, wangxian, JC/WQ, canon divergence, time travel fix-it, Memories, Butterfly Effect, Sexual assualt, Self Harm, Self Doubt, BAMF JC, Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rape Recovery, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Everyone Lives au, PTSD, good parent YZY, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Canon-Typical Violence, Warning: JGS, Emotional Manipulation, Manipulation, Second Chances, WIP)

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18. Help me find a fic pls! Wei wuxian is an omega in this one and when lan zhan (alpha) smells him he gets a strong reaction and gets into rut. Wei wuxian is basically outcastes by the lan sect and later on I think he becomes a spy?? lol pls help idk tbh 🙏🙏

FOUND?🔒Pendulum by ShippersList (M, 69k, WangXian, XiYao, Canon Divergence, Non-Traditional A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Misunderstandings, Canon-Typical Violence, Spies & Secret Agents, Fake Character Death, Slow Burn, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, BAMF WWX, Attempted Sexual Assault, Canonical Character Death, Mutual Pining, Good MY, Introspection, Self-Sacrificing WWX, Love Confessions, Protective LWJ, past child sexual abuse) from the series omegaverse murder gremlins

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19. Bby gurls I need help with a fic where the juniors saw lan zhan with a person in a dress and thought he was cheating when they were getting donuts at a sleep over (they were not allowed to be out that late). The juniors planned to steal his phone during a cookout, only to find searches of him planning a trip of bora bora. Apperantly he want cheating and it was just Wei wuxian dressing up (thx bby gurls I love u)

FOUND? Junior.exe has stopped working by Luminos07 (T, 4k, WangXian, Crack Treated Seriously, Attempt at Humor, Junior Quartet Dynamics, Junior Trio Shenanigans, Crack, Humor, Comedy, What’s the tag for the juniors going through LWJ's phone?, Protective JC, Modern, no actual infidelity, Established Relationship, LWJ's sugar daddy tendencies, WWX Protection Squad)

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20. hi! i'm looking for a particular fic in which there was a recurring anecdote/motif of a wife(?) who would touch the teapot to check the temperature for her husband so often in the same spot that she developed a burn scar on her hand from it. at some point in the fic wangxian had a conversation about whether or not that was romantic, and at another point the pov character (i think it was wwx?) realized that he or lwj had been doing the same thing (in a figurative way) through his actions. i think the fic was a canon era au but it could have been anything, and unfortunately i can't remember enough of the plot to find it. thank you! @ineskew

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[dreamsfromthesandman]

IM BACKKKKK!!!!! So sorry it took so long. Time is a finicky beeotch these days. Without further ado—

Not my gif. Sorry may be kinda short but more parts to come.

My Big Fat Wedding

“Dylan! I’m home!” Y/N shouted as she walked through the front door. She was with her mom and aunts in preparation for her and Dylan’s upcoming wedding.

“Hey, how’d it go?” Dylan padded through the living room, leaving a smooch on your cheek as he walked by.

“Ugh! It’s too much. Too many aunts. Too many traditions. Too many invitee’s.” You went on. It’s not that you didn’t love your family. Its just that they were loud, in everyone’s business, and they wanted the wedding their way. Y/N already broke tradition by living with Dylan before marriage. The traditions are so old school but that’s the way your family is. One aunt wanted you to wear this family heirloom whole another wanted to take you shopping. Your mom just wanted you to be happy but insisted on certain centerpieces. It’s turning out to be a family party instead of your and Dylan’s wedding.

“Does your mom still insist on the centerpieces?” Dylan asked. He wasn’t a fan of them but didn’t want to disappoint his mother in law.

“Oh, absolutely. Aunt Beth wants me to wear the heirloom still.”

“The one with the long sleeves and high neck with no skin showing at all?”

“That’s the one. And aunt Marge wants to take me shopping for a wedding dress but I can only get a certain style.”

“Hmm. Or you could just come naked,” he stated in a deep voice that only meant one thing. He nuzzled your neck and peppered kisses along your collarbone.

“Dylan, would you stop? I’m having a existential crisis,” you laughed. His beard was tickling you.

“Hey. I could let your aunt know that I actually like the heirloom and she would and you wear it.”

Y/N stood in shock, mouth agape, “you wouldn’t dare.”

“I would,too.” He quipped. You knew he was only teasing but you could envision yourself with no skin showing on your summer day wedding and being absolutely drenched in sweat.

Later on— 2 weeks before the wedding

“Mom, I don’t know. Aunt Marge bought this dress, and while it’s not like the heirloom, I feel like I will suffocate in it.”

“Well, honey, you know the tradition. Not to much skin and aunt Marge said it’s absolutely gorgeous. Plus the alterations are pretty much done. Sweetheart, everyone will see a stunning bride,” Y/N’s mom stated. Y/N knew she was done talking about it.

“Thanks mom, you know—“ she was cut off by her mother screaming at her father at the family grocery store. The grocery store has been in the family for generations and Y/N worked there part time.

“cosa diavolo stai facendo?!” Her mother shouted. Italian for what the hell are you doing, Y/N was sure her father was climbing the shelves trying to stock them.

“mamma stai ascoltando?” Y/N asked, Italian for mom are you listening as she knew that her mom has long forgotten about their phone call.

“That was sexy,” Dylan overheard your Italian. Y/N didn’t speak it often unless she was talking with family as sometimes they would forget their English and Italian was easier for them. Being bi-lingual, it was sometimes hard to keep up with both languages especially if Dylan was around. He was Italian and knows Italian, but he didn’t practice enough. Y/N waived him off as she was attempted to get her mothers attention again.

“Mamma?”

“ti richiamerò,” and she hung up.

“Ugh, of course,” putting the phone down on the counter.

“I could hear her all the at over here,” Dylan motioned as he was on the couch, “is she calling you back later?”

“Yeah, dad was doing something he wasn’t supposed to be.”

“You speaking Italian is such a turn on babe.”

“Maybe if you practiced more we could do our vows in Italian,” you spat.

“Hey— what does that mean? conosco l'italiano,” Dylan said.

“You barely know Italian,” you stated, “ I’m sorry babe. I’m just frustrated.”

“What if we eloped?” He stated.

“Eloped? You want me to be murdered by my traditional loving family?” Y/N asked incredulously. If they found out, they would most definitely start shouting.

“amore mio,” Dylan stated, “ I love you so much. If this is causing so much stress, we can just elope and then pretend to get married on our wedding day.”

Y/N pondered the thought. It would be so much easier to elope and pretend but being dishonest would kill you on the inside. The phone rang before you could answer Dylan. Swiping the answer button you immediately heard your aunt Marge screaming.

“Y/N? It’s your aunt Marge,” she shouted.

“Hi, aunt Marge, I know, I have called ID.”

“Well, darling, I wanted to say I have your dress. Just picked it up from the alterations. You need to come try it on asap.” Y/N could tell she was driving. The horns honking at her horrible driving could only mean that she is narrowly missing other cars or people.

“These people out here don’t know how to drive,” she stated.

“Well, you know how it is.”

“When do you want to come over to try it?” She shouted again.

“Damn, I can hear her,” Dylan whispered. He was thanking his lucky stars his family wasn’t like yours. While he loved them, sometimes they are way to over the top.

Putting a hand over the speaker y/n cussed out Dylan in the most loving way.

“I’ll come over this weekend.”

“Perfect! See you then.” And she hung up.

“Does your family say goodbye or just hang up on you?”

“They just hang up.”

“Have you thought about what I said?” He asked.

“Yes I have. Maybe we should?”

Dylan sat up on the couch a little bit more, “you want to? Right now?”

“Right now? Like at the courthouse?”

It was a thought but not one Y/N thought she wanted. Eloping was one thing the courthouse was another. People would find out in this town and then her family would get wind.

“No, silly. Cmon, I’ll pull some strings and we will be back by morning,” he stated, taking his phone out of his pocket. Being a movie star had its perks you supposed. Especially with him getting more roles he had some money. Not enough to quit working but enough to love comfortably. Y/N couldn’t help but be at ease for once about this wedding.

Three hours, a white dress, a tuxedo, and a plane ride later both stood at the little chapel in Las Vegas. Y/N just stood there in her dress, looking at the handsome Dylan in awe. She couldn’t believe she was going to elope with Mr. O’Brien.

“Are we going to go in?” Dylan asked with hesitation, he felt her nervousness.

“I don’t know,” Y/N breathed, “what if someone finds out?”

“Baby, no one will find out. I love you.”

“If you promise, then we can do it.”

“I promise, no one will know but us,” he affirmed giving a soft kiss on the lips. His were warm and soft, like pillows.

A smile played on Y/Ns lips as she stood there, thinking about what she was about to do. What they were about to do. They held hands and walked inside the little chapel.

————————————————————————

Part 2?? Lemme know what yall think

[starberry-cupcake]

I have made the most 2008 goth forum-like banner I could create to put my liveblogging posts of tlt under because those are the vibes I find appropriate and it gives me nostalgia. If this was 2008 blogspot, you'd be hearing something like HIM's Wings of a Butterfly, or something like that, please picture that.

previously, in gideon the ninth:

this happened

were we are now:

I forced myself to stop reading for the day so I could update a sensible amount and not a thesis length post nobody will read

it wasn't easy to force myself to stop reading

you know how it is

so, turns out that protozoa was dead all along (ish)

people here die and live and kinda live-die and die-live, you know

dulcinea del toboso soraya montenegro septimus was hiding that fact

she has also not mentioned exactly how he died (she said an accident??? harrow said he was stabbed?? what, he fell on a sword heart first????)

I am still not done with her

I still don't trust her

she's gonna die and I'm gonna still think she's scheming

ANYWAY

gideon DID suspect harrow

she had a bit of a crisis over it in front of palmolive's salad

palmolive reacts by taking off and putting on his glasses 25 times

and harrow had my exact thought process of "she's gonna go to dulcinea instead of me if she finds out"

I am very unnerved at how much my thought process and harrow's have aligned so far

very concerned for my mental state

ANYWAY (vol. 2)

palmolive says what I said, that it's not harrowcita's style to kill so sloppily

gideon tells palmolive her past trauma and how all the kids in the ninth except her and harrowbeth died and how she blames herself because harrow kinda had the childhood of asuka langley soryuu in evangelion but worse

palmolive does this

camilla, the moon to my stars, the woman of the year, my qp wife, brings in harrow with a handcuff

so, let me set the scene

there's a guy's head in a box, gideon has told palmolive her life story, and in comes camilla with harrow on a kid harness like she's a scary parent at disneyland

this is a sitcom

anyway, they all go to dulcinea's lair and have a talk with the group

I still kinda stan yandere twin ianthe (sp??), I'm not gonna lie you folks

she's ooky kooky spooky in a fun way

like, deranged (affectionate)

so, as usual, nobody agrees on anything and everyone fights and dulcinea coughs up a hairball

now, harrow and gideon go to the pool

which is salty now, much like gideon

my first thought was "gideon can't swim, she's gonna drown like sonic!!"

but they could stand in the pool apparently so it's fine

I mean, physically it's fine, EMOTIONALLY not so much

it's time to come clean, share trauma and also maybe flirt in the pool, if that's what's going on here

I think it's what's going on

it's hard to tell with them, but there's tension, proximity and hugs and stuff

basically, if I understand correctly, the ninth put all the kids in an infomercial blender and harrowbean was powered into life

but gideon is baby hercules and survived

which explains why she was turned into a blood sprinkler and the next day she was doing push ups like a maniac

I mean, it explains why she could physically do that, not why she thought that's the safe thing to do

so the ninth was like ?????? and feared gideon

and proceded to treat her like konoha treated naruto uzumaki

no adult person in the ninth was making sound decisions, it's what I'm getting at

case in point: ortus and his mom were blown to bits

also, very important

if I understood right, there's a frozen girl in the ninth's fridge tomb

a frozen girl like dr victor fries's wife nora in batman, or hyoga's mom in saint seiya, or han solo

ice cube frozen girl with a sword and chains and the vibe of this specific barbie doll from the haunted beauty collection

it's like if snow white was the apocalypse

you're gonna hate all my references by the end of this

I'm so sorry

there's a threat in a girl, in the ice, in the tomb, in the ninth house, that's the gist of it

and harrow has existential trauma because pretty much every person below the age of 18 died for her to live, so she wants to make it count

and gideon is hercules who comes from elsewhere and has the genes of a demigod or a kryptonian

but all of that doesn't matter, what matters is that harrow says the most metal phrase ever and goes: "I am a war crime"

?????? HELLO?????

and here's the thing (I have told you this @lady-harrowhark ), this is the book @ me every time I discover some truth and I look at my ebook's progress bar

if you're not completely annoyed, I'll be back tomorrow with more reactions to reveals

[watchingblsnowandforever]

We Are Ep. 14: Part 3/3

Hello again!! =D

Part 1 and Part 2

Warning: long post 😊😅 (also, I'm so sorry for the delay, I've been sleep deprived for the last two to three days because my insomnia and depression made comebacks, but I'm better now)

She reminds me so much of my own mom-

My mom adopts my friends, and no one has any say in it, while my dad encourages her 😭👍🏼

I absolutely love her relationship with all of them. While it's given that Peem will talk about Phum, Q has talked about Toey too, and it's quite obvious that Peem and his og group of friends have visited quite often before. She asks no question, and is so comfortable with them that they don't hesitate for a second to introduce their boyfriends. This is maybe not realistic (I'm pretty sure my mom while very similar wouldn't be this accepting) but it's very in line with this show, and I really like it.

GIVE ME MORE ACCEPTING PARENTS IN BL!!!

I am 100% sure that for a moment there, Phum's brain short circuited 😭

I mean, just look at it from his perspective. The boy he's head over heels for talks about him like this to his mom. If it were me, I'd be having an existential crisis right there, he has much more self control than me.

I'll be living here, in this moment for the next 1000 years, thanks for asking.

Listen, I'm a big fan of domestic fluff, BUT THIS???

Also, I don't usually talk about these, but on Phum's t-shirt, it says "ALWAYS FORWARD NO TURNING BACK" which is very relevant here because Peem helps him see a future, and to enjoy the present as it comes back. He's slowly but surely leaving his scarred past behind.

I have so many fic ideas smh

And yet, I don't really see you, complaining, Peem.

He says while sipping from his own glass. Very convincing, Peem.

THIS WAS SO CUTE OH MY GODS 😭😭🫶🏼

Btw, Peem? Phum is calling you "meow" for the rest of your lives. Just like you'll be calling him Puppy Phum. <3

oh-

These few seconds spoke so much.

The realization that this is what a real family is supposed to look like, that he'll probably never have this with his own parents.

But then- then he realizes that now he can have this. He can have Peem, and a family full of love and sit in the midst of his brother and his friends and Peem's friends and be accepted and loved.

Maybe he can't have this with his own parents, but he can have this with Peem, and that for him, is already far more than he could have ever imagined.

I just love that addition 😭😂

Peem is absolutely incapable of not calling Phum some version of "idiot (affectionate)" and I adore him for it. <33

Oho, violent Fang is back.

But seriously, let the others sleep, Pun and Toey 😭

THIS LOOK. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US??

There's only two eps left (?!!!!!), so I really hope that the next one is when they get together

The small thumb soothing his tummy 🥺🫶🏼

All we got are crumbs of ChainPun throughout and they still managed to make us go insane. Mad respect for their friends who have to deal with them on a daily basis 😭👍🏼

Also, when Peem got up to ask what they were doing and Phum pulled him back to sleep, did y'all see that tiny forehead kiss? My man never misses a chance to kiss Peem, and I am so proud of him.

This reminds me of such a funny story-

So. We went to visit this historical building (note: historical) and the stairs leading up were naturally kind of steep and broken. It was very crowded, so it was four or five teams/families to one guide. We went up slowly, but since the guide was obviously very used to it, he went up faster, and was waiting for us at the landing. So one couple asked how he got there so fast, and he jokingly said "I took the lift" and the man was like "Why didn't you tell us before?? One of us [I don't remember who he said] just had knee surgery!" and the rest of us were just staring at him like ???? are you listening to yourself- 😶

My parents and I laugh about it to this day 😭😂 (this was almost 8 years back OH GODS SAYING THAT MADE ME FEEL SO OLD-)

What next ep looks like:

What I looked like after watching the trailer:

(In that order.)

That's it for ep 14! See y'all in 4 days (I fear for what will become of me after I watch ep 15).

If you got this far, thank you so much for reading! 😊

Here have a croissant 🥐

[galaxysupreme17]

AU - The Study Session Scheme

Y/n = Your Name

Rio Vidal x daughter!reader!

The sound of pages turning and soft mumbling filled the Kaplans' cozy living room as Y/n and Billy worked through their study materials. Agatha's English class was no joke, and an upcoming in-class essay loomed over them. Both teens were determined to be prepared. Y/n sat cross-legged on the plush carpet, her notebook sprawled in front of her, while Billy was draped dramatically over the couch, his textbook balanced on his knees.

"Okay," Billy said, tapping his pen against his chin. "Let's run through potential themes again. If Agatha's giving us 'identity' as one of the prompts, you know she will want something deep. Like, existential crisis-level deep."

Y/n snorted, flipping through her own notes. "Great. I'll write, 'Who am I?' fifty times and see if I get extra credit for creativity."

Billy laughed, but his expression turned thoughtful as he set his notebook aside. "Speaking of identity," he started, his voice taking on a tone that Y/n instantly recognized as suspicious, "I've been thinking about your mom."

Y/n froze mid-highlight, her eyes narrowing. "What about her?"

"Okay, hear me out," Billy said, sitting up and leaning forward, his enthusiasm practically radiating off him. "Rio and Ms. Harkness would be perfect together."

"What?" Y/n blinked, genuinely startled. "No. Absolutely not."

Billy raised his hands in mock surrender. "Just listen. They're both super smart, super cool, and, let's be honest, Ms. Harkness could use a little happiness in her life. She's got that 'mysterious loner' vibe, but your mom? She's the kind of person who could break through that."

Y/n rolled her eyes, trying to focus back on her notes. "Billy, this is not happening. My mom doesn't need me meddling in her love life."

"But it's not meddling," Billy argued, scooting closer. "It's... facilitating destiny."

"That's literally meddling," Y/n shot back. "And what makes you think they'd even like each other? Agatha's my teacher, Billy. She'd kill me if she found out I was scheming behind her back."

Billy grinned, unperturbed. "She wouldn't have to know. And come on, you've seen the way she talks about literature-it's like watching someone come alive. She's so passionate and... I don't know, fiery. Your mom's all warmth and energy. They'd balance each other out perfectly."

Y/n sighed, pressing her palms against her face. "Why do I even let you talk me into these things?"

"Because you know I'm right," Billy said, nudging her shoulder with his. "And because you love your mom and want her to be happy. Imagine how great it would be if she had someone to share all her corny jokes and amazing cooking with. Someone who actually gets her."

Y/n peeked at him through her fingers, her resolve wavering. "You're way too good at this, you know that?"

"I'll take that as a yes." Billy grinned triumphantly, flipping open his notebook. "So, here's what I'm thinking: we invite Ms. Harkness over for coffee under the guise of needing extra study help. That's step one."

"Step one?" Y/n groaned. "There's a whole plan?"

"Of course!" Billy said, his eyes lighting up. "Step two is orchestrating some 'chance' encounters. You know, like bumping into each other at the coffee shop or the library."

"Billy," Y/n said, trying to inject some reason into the conversation, "this is ridiculous. And if it blows up in our faces, you're taking the fall."

"Deal," Billy said without hesitation. "But it won't blow up. Trust me, Y/n. Your mom and Ms. Harkness are going to thank us when this all works out."

Y/n shook her head, a reluctant smile tugging at her lips. "You're impossible, you know that?"

"Yep," Billy replied, leaning back against the couch. "But I'm also a genius matchmaker. You'll see."

As they returned to their study session, Y/n couldn't shake the feeling that this was a terrible idea. But as much as she hated to admit it, a small part of her couldn't help but hope Billy was right.

The next morning, Y/n dragged herself into school, already dreading Billy's next move.

"Alright," Billy said, sidling up to her as they walked down the hallway. "Today's the day."

"The day for what?" Y/n asked, pretending she didn't know exactly what he meant.

Billy rolled his eyes. "The day we execute Step One of Operation Matchmaker."

"Billy, no," Y/n groaned. "My mom won't fall for whatever ridiculous scheme you've cooked up, and neither is Ms. Harkness. She's too smart for this."

"Exactly," Billy said, undeterred. "That's why we need a flawless plan. Lucky for you, I've already thought of everything."

"That's not reassuring."

Billy ignored her. "So, I told Ms. Harkness yesterday that we needed a little extra help with our essays. She said she'd be happy to stay after school and go over some pointers. All we have to do is ensure your mom picks us up afterward."

Y/n stopped dead in her tracks. "You're kidding."

"Nope," Billy said, grinning. "And once they meet, sparks are going to fly. Trust me."

Y/n groaned, resuming her walk. "This is a terrible idea. My mom will think it's weird, and Ms. Harkness will think we're insane."

"Or," Billy countered, "your mom and Ms. Harkness will hit it off, go out for coffee, and thank me in their wedding toast. You're welcome."

Y/n shot him a glare. "If this backfires, I'm throwing you under the bus."

That afternoon, Y/n sat stiffly in Agatha's classroom, pretending to focus on her essay notes. Billy, however, was as relaxed as ever, grinning like a cat with a canary.

"So," Billy said, leaning back in his chair as Agatha reviewed his outline. "How's the neighborhood treating you, Ms. Harkness?"

Agatha glanced up, adjusting her glasses. "The neighborhood? Oh, it's quite nice. Peaceful, for the most part. The people are friendly, and it's... quaint."

"Yeah," Billy said, nodding sagely. "Quaint's a good word. Speaking of neighbors, isn't it funny how you live right next door to Y/n and her mom?"

Y/n froze, glaring at Billy. Subtle, Billy. Real subtle.

Agatha raised an eyebrow but smiled. "Yes, I've seen them around. Your mom is lovely, Y/n. Very gracious and polite."

Y/n mumbled, "Thanks," while furiously scribbling nonsense in her notebook to avoid meeting her teacher's gaze.

Billy wasn't done. "You know, Ms. Harkness, you and Rio should totally hang out sometime. Like, maybe over coffee or something? You two seem like you'd get along."

Agatha tilted her head, giving Billy a bemused look. "Is that so?"

"Oh, definitely," Billy said, nodding enthusiastically. "You're both smart, cultured... into books and stuff. It's a match made in neighborly heaven."

Y/n finally snapped her pencil in half, drawing Agatha's attention.

"Are you alright, dear?" Agatha asked, clearly suppressing a laugh.

"Fine," Y/n muttered. "Totally fine. Billy's just... full of ideas today."

Agatha chuckled, standing up and gathering her notes. "Well, it's nice to hear such glowing recommendations. But I think your mom and I are already on friendly terms. No need for elaborate setups."

Billy shot Y/n a triumphant smirk as Agatha turned to her desk. Y/n glared daggers at him, mouthing, Drop it.

After the session, Rio arrived at the school right on time. Y/n braced herself as her mom walked into the classroom, her usual composed demeanor making Y/n wish she could vanish.

"Hi, Agatha," Rio said with a smile. "Thanks for staying late with the kids. Y/n mentioned you've been helping them prep for their essay test."

"Of course," Agatha replied, matching her neighbor's warm tone. "They've been working hard. Billy, in particular, has... enthusiasm."

Billy grinned. "You know it."

Rio chuckled, glancing at Y/n, who was studiously avoiding eye contact. "Well, we appreciate it. Maybe I should return the favor sometime. You're welcome to stop by if you ever need a cup of coffee or a break from grading papers."

Y/n's head snapped up. What?!

"That's very kind of you," Agatha said, her expression softening. "I might just take you up on that."

Billy elbowed Y/n triumphantly, earning himself a whispered, "I'm going to kill you."

"Why don't we walk out together?" Rio suggested, gesturing toward the door.

The four of them left the classroom, Billy practically skipping as they reached the parking lot.

Later that evening, Billy's grin stretched ear to ear as he FaceTimed Y/n from his room.

"Did you see that?!" he crowed. "Step One: executed to perfection. Your mom basically invited her over!"

Y/n flopped back on her bed, groaning. "It wasn't a plan. She was just being polite."

"Polite?!" Billy scoffed. "That was a window of opportunity. Now, all we have to do is nudge them a little closer. What if you 'accidentally' invite Ms. Harkness over while your mom's baking something? Boom-instant bonding over cookies."

"I'm not sabotaging my kitchen for your dumb plan."

Billy smirked. "Fine. Then I'll do it myself. Don't worry, Y/n. Love is on its way."

Y/n groaned, burying her face in her pillow. "I hate you."

"Love you too, bestie," Billy said, already scheming his next move.

The following days were a blur of school, homework, and Billy's relentless scheming. Y/n tried her best to keep him in check, but her so-called best friend was like an unstoppable matchmaking machine. Every time she saw him, he had a new "brilliant" idea for how to bring Agatha and Rio closer together.

On Friday, Y/n was halfway through a study session in the kitchen when Rio walked in, her hands dusted with flour. She was humming softly to herself, a melody Y/n recognized as an old Spanish tune from her childhood.

"Whatcha baking, Mom?" Y/n asked, grateful for the distraction from her notes.

"Conchas," Rio said, flashing her daughter a smile. "I thought I'd bring some to the neighbors. It's been a while since we've shared anything."

Y/n froze. "Which neighbors?"

Rio shrugged. "The Kaplans, of course. And maybe Agatha, if she's home."

Y/n tried to keep her face neutral, but her heart started pounding. Billy's obnoxious voice echoed in her head: "Boom-instant bonding over cookies." She swore he'd willed this into existence.

"Need any help?" Y/n offered her voice a little too eager.

Rio raised an eyebrow. "You? Wanting to help in the kitchen? What's the catch?"

"No catch!" Y/n said quickly, grabbing an apron from the hook on the wall. "I just... want to spend some time with you. That's all."

Rio chuckled, shaking her head. "Alright, mija. Grab the extra rolling pin."

An hour later, a fresh batch of conchas cooled on the counter. The kitchen smelled like cinnamon and sugar, and Y/n had to admit the pastries looked amazing.

Rio carefully arranged a few into a basket, wrapping it with a colorful cloth. "Alright, I'll drop these off at the Kaplans' first. Want to come with me?"

Y/n hesitated. If she went with her mom, she could maybe steer the conversation away from Billy's ridiculous matchmaking plans. But if she stayed behind, there was no telling what might happen if Rio and Agatha ended up chatting alone.

"Uh, sure," Y/n said, grabbing her jacket.

When they arrived at the Kaplans' house, Billy answered the door almost immediately, his face lighting up when he saw the basket.

"Mrs. Vidal! You shouldn't have!" he said, dramatically clutching his chest.

"Don't be so dramatic," Rio said with a laugh. "It's just a little something to share."

Billy winked at Y/n. "Speaking of sharing, how about some gossip? Anything exciting happening on your street?"

Y/n rolled her eyes. "We're leaving now. Bye, Billy."

"Wait!" Billy called as she dragged Rio away. "Don't forget about cookies!"

The walk to Agatha's house felt like an eternity. Y/n mentally prepared herself for the possibility of awkward small talk-or worse, Billy's influence somehow reappeared.

Rio knocked on Agatha's door, and Y/n held her breath as it swung open.

Agatha stood in the doorway, her usual confident demeanor softening into a warm smile when she saw who it was. "Rio, Y/n. What a pleasant surprise."

"I hope we're not interrupting," Rio said, holding out the basket. "I baked some conchas and thought you might enjoy a few."

Agatha's eyes lit up as she accepted the basket. "Thank you. That's very kind of you. Please, come in."

Y/n reluctantly followed her mom inside, and the cozy atmosphere of Agatha's home immediately made her feel out of place. Books were stacked neatly on almost every surface, and the faint scent of lavender lingered in the air.

Agatha set the basket on the counter and turned to Rio. "Would you like some tea? I was just about to make a pot."

Rio smiled. "That sounds lovely."

Y/n stared at them, torn between panic and disbelief as they chatted like old friends. Agatha asked about the recipe for the conchas, and Rio told her stories about learning to bake as a child.

It wasn't until Agatha laughed-a genuine, carefree laugh-that Y/n realized Billy might actually have been onto something.

"Well, I should let you get back to your evening," Rio said after finishing her tea. "Thank you for having us, Agatha."

"The pleasure was mine," Agatha replied, walking them to the door. "And thank you again for the conchas. They're delightful."

As they stepped outside, Y/n glanced over her shoulder to see Agatha watching them with a small smile.

"You two seemed to hit it off," Y/n said casually as they walked home.

Rio shrugged, her expression unreadable. "She's a very interesting woman."

Y/n didn't know what to make of that, but she couldn't help feeling a little hopeful. Maybe Billy wasn't entirely insane after all.

Of course, she wasn't about to tell him that.

The next morning, Y/n groaned when her phone buzzed with a FaceTime call from Billy.

"Good news!" Billy said the moment she picked up. "I heard from my mom that Ms. Harkness loved the conchas. She even called your mom 'charming.'"

Y/n sighed, flopping back onto her bed. "I'm never going to hear the end of this, am I?"

"Nope," Billy said, his grin practically glowing through the screen. "Now, onto Step Two..."

Y/n groaned, but despite herself, she couldn't stop the small smile that crept onto her face.

A couple of weeks later, the morning sun cast a golden glow over the quiet suburban street as Rio Vidal stepped outside to retrieve the mail. She tugged her cardigan tighter against the crisp air, savoring the stillness. These peaceful moments were rare, and Rio had learned to appreciate them after her divorce and the big move.

As she sifted through bills and junk mail, a voice called out, interrupting her thoughts.

"Morning, Rio."

She glanced up to see Agatha Harkness walking by, her dark coat swishing dramatically with each step. The signature smirk on Agatha's face made Rio's heart do an embarrassing flip.

"Morning, Agatha," Rio replied, trying to sound casual as she tucked a stray curl behind her ear.

Agatha slowed her pace, pausing near the gate to Rio's yard. "You're up early. I take it the chaos upstairs hasn't started yet?"

Rio chuckled. "Not yet, but give it time. Teenagers and FaceTime marathons are a dangerous combination."

Agatha laughed, her gaze lingering on Rio. Their flirtation had been building for months, with each interaction filled with teasing remarks and meaningful glances. But for once, Rio decided to be bold.

"Actually, Agatha," Rio began, her tone turning serious, "are you free tonight? I was thinking... maybe we could have dinner?"

Agatha arched an eyebrow, clearly surprised but not displeased. "Dinner, huh? Are you asking me out, Vidal?"

"Maybe I am," Rio said, her confidence bolstered by Agatha's playful tone.

Agatha's smirk softened into a genuine smile. "I'd love to. Pick me up at seven?"

Rio grinned. "It's a date."

The day passed quickly, with Rio busy working from home while Y/n holed up in her room, laughing and chatting with Kate and Yelena on FaceTime. Every so often, Rio would hear bursts of laughter echo through the house and couldn't help but smile. The move had been tough on both of them, but Y/n's friends made her adjustment easier.

Around mid-afternoon, Rio found herself pacing in her room, second-guessing her decision. Should I tell Y/n about the date? She chewed her lip as she stared at her reflection in the mirror. "What's the worst that could happen?" she muttered to herself.

Finally deciding to let the chips fall where they may, Rio began getting ready. She traded her casual sweater and jeans for a sleek black dress, curled her hair, and applied makeup.

Upstairs, Y/n flopped onto her bed, laptop perched precariously on her knees as Kate and Yelena cackled on-screen.

"Okay, so picture this," Kate said between giggles. "Y/n, as an undercover spy, trying to blend in during a mission but wearing the worst possible outfit-like neon green camo or something."

"Please, she'd make it fashion," Yelena snickered.

"Ha-ha, very funny," Y/n retorted with mock indignation.

Suddenly, a creak from downstairs caught her attention. She glanced at her door, curiosity piqued. "Hold on, guys," she said, scooping up her laptop. "My mom's up to something."

Kate and Yelena leaned closer to their cameras. "Ooh, this sounds juicy," Kate teased.

Y/n padded downstairs and peeked into her mom's room. Her jaw nearly hit the floor when she saw Rio standing in front of the mirror, adjusting her earrings and looking way too glamorous for an ordinary evening.

"Mom?" Y/n asked, stepping inside.

Rio spun around, caught off guard. "Oh! Hey, sweetheart. What's up?"

Kate and Yelena's voices rang out from the laptop. "She looks amazing! What's the occasion?"

Y/n raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, Mom, what's going on? You're all dressed up."

Rio hesitated, her gaze flickering between her daughter and the laptop screen. "Well, uh... I have a date."

"A DATE?!" the three teens exclaimed in unison, Y/n's voice loudest of all.

"Mom!" Y/n stared at her mother, wide-eyed. "With who? When? How long has this been going on?"

Rio held up her hands defensively. "Okay, okay, calm down. It's just one date. And it's with Agatha."

The room fell silent for half a second before Yelena and Kate erupted into cheers.

Yelena burst out laughing. "You mean to tell me your mom is going on a date with your English teacher? This is gold!"

Kate chimed in. "This is iconic. Agatha is awesome! I mean, she's, like, way better than any of our other teachers."

"Not helping!" Y/n exclaimed, burying her face in her hands.

Rio couldn't help but laugh softly, shaking her head. "Well, for the record, I didn't plan on dating your English teacher. It just... happened."

Before Y/n could respond, the doorbell rang. Rio glanced at the clock. "That's her. I'll see you later, sweetheart."

"Oh, no, you don't!" Y/n grabbed her laptop and bolted for the door, Kate and Yelena's faces still onscreen.

When Y/n flung the door open, there stood Agatha, looking sharp in a tailored navy blazer.

"Well, well, if it isn't my favorite teenager," Agatha said with a wink. "What's with the audience?"

Kate and Yelena chimed in simultaneously. "Hi, Agatha!"

Agatha chuckled. "Hello, troublemakers. Should I be worried about what you've been telling Y/n?"

"Not as worried as you should be about us setting a curfew," Kate quipped.

"That's right," Yelena added. "Have her home by ten. No later!"

Agatha smirked, tilting her head toward Rio, who had just appeared behind Y/n. "Looks like your entourage has spoken. Shall we?"

Rio rolled her eyes, leaning down to kiss Y/n on the forehead. "Behave while I'm gone, okay?"

Y/n groaned dramatically but smiled. "Fine. Have fun, I guess. But seriously, Mom, don't make this a regular thing."

As Rio and Agatha walked to the car, Y/n closed the door and turned back to her friends.

"Well, that happened," she said, flopping onto the couch.

Half an hour after Rio and Agatha left for their date. Y/n, Kate, and Yelena were still on FaceTime, sprawled out on Y/n's bed and laughing hysterically at some story Yelena recounted about her latest escapade in New York.

"So Clint walks in, takes one look at the mess we made, and says, 'I'm too old for this,' and just walks right back out!" Kate finished, practically crying with laughter.

Yelena wiped a tear from her eye. "Classic Clint. He's like a dad to you but also done with all of us."

Before Y/n could reply, the doorbell rang again, followed by frantic knocking.

"What the heck?" Y/n muttered, grabbing her laptop and heading for the door. "Hold on, guys. Someone's about to break the door down."

She opened the door to find Billy, red-faced and wide-eyed, breathing heavily like he had run the whole way to her house.

"Billy? What's wrong?" Y/n asked, confused.

Billy burst into the living room, waving his arms dramatically. "You are NOT going to believe what I just saw!"

Y/n closed the door and turned to him, her brow furrowed. "Okay, calm down. What's going on?"

Billy paced in a circle, still catching his breath. "I was downtown, you know, grabbing food with Tommy, and we passed this restaurant, and I SWEAR I saw your mom having dinner with Ms. Harkness!"

Kate and Yelena, still on the laptop screen, immediately started laughing.

"Wait," Billy said, suddenly noticing their faces. "Why are they laughing? Why are YOU laughing? Did you know about this?"

Y/n shrugged, trying not to smirk. "Yeah, Billy. We know."

Billy froze, his jaw-dropping. "What?! How long have you known? Why didn't you tell me?"

Kate grinned. "We found out like, what, 45 minutes ago? When Rio was getting ready?"

"Yep," Yelena chimed in. "And Y/n's been internally screaming ever since. Isn't it great?"

Billy threw his hands up. "Great? GREAT? This is insane! Your mom is out on a date with our English teacher! Do you know how awkward that's going to be in class on Monday?"

"Tell me about it," Y/n groaned, flopping onto the couch. "But it's not like I can stop them. They're both adults."

Billy collapsed into the chair across from her, his head in his hands. "This is wild. How did we not see this coming? Agatha's been dropping hints in class for months about having a 'special someone.'"

Kate leaned closer to the camera, eyes wide. "Wait-what? She has?"

"Yeah!" Billy said, sitting up. "She's always mentioning how she likes 'strong, independent women' or talking about someone who 'makes her laugh.' And now it all makes sense."

Yelena laughed. "Wow, she was literally describing Rio this whole time. Amazing."

Y/n groaned again. "Okay, can we stop analyzing my mom's love life? I'm trying to process this nightmare one step at a time."

Billy smirked. "Fine, fine. But I'm still not over this. Do you think they will become, like, a thing?"

Y/n sighed, rolling her eyes. "Knowing my mom? Probably. But honestly, if she's happy, I guess that's what matters."

Kate grinned. "Look at you being mature about it."

"Don't push it," Y/n warned, throwing a pillow at the laptop.

The group burst out laughing, the initial shock finally fading into something resembling acceptance or at least as close as Y/n would get that night.

[radioisntdead]

Hihihi

I read the request you wrote for lucifer, and it made me so happy!!!!

And, I do have one more request, could you maybe generally write for the hazbin group finding out the readers cause of death being from a roller coaster, and them not knowing who they are? (Could it maybe be a song fic using the ballad of Jane doe?)

Or

A platonic angel dust fic with the reader talking(singing) about their previous family and / or life? Along with them breaking down at the end, with a small bit of comfort from angel dust? (Dead mom from beetle juice)

You can choose either or, it doesn't really matter to me :)

With love,

-Xin 💙

Good evening my dear! So glad to have you sending in another request,

I AM A MAJOR RIDE THE CYCLONE FAN, I FORCED MY BEST FRIEND TO WATCH IT WITH ME AND GOT EM' HOOKED ON IT, I WATCHED IT AS I WROTE RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CRIED IT IS A GREAT MUSICAL, I GREATLY RECOMMEND IT, IT'S ALLEGEDLY ON YOUTUBE

Reader much like Jane Doe is going to be a doll, I like to call this, reader having a lil existential crisis during a trust exercise turned life stories sharing time.

Also I'll tag you like I did last time! @fuck-this-shit-xin

The fallen saint

People who live in the hazbin hotel x gn reader

Warnings!

Death, decapitation, dolls, I am still terrified of dolls why did I add them? I don't know, accidentally implied underage drinking but the reader isn't underage, reader and Angel are very loosely implied to be besties because yes

Ballad of Jane doe

You came to the hotel confused and scared, you found a flyer that advertised and you thought that it'd be better then the chaos in the other parts of hell.

You didn't remember much about your life, just that you died from a rollercoaster accident with your friends? Classmates? Family? You didn't remember,

The last thing you remember was someone clutching your hand saying something that was muffled over the screams before a sharp piece of metal sliced your throat and you saw the sky.

Sometimes you get glimpses of life before, school uniforms, arcades, lights, someone saying a muffled name, holding you, smiling at you.

Who were they? A friend? Family?

You wish you knew.

Charlie was the most sympathetic to your situation, embracing you with open arms into the hotel, imagine not knowing who you were? Well you didn't have to imagine.

You were practically a clean slate, perfect for redemption no matter what you did in the past, because you weren't that person anymore.

Charlie had organized a trust exercise that had pinwheeled into mild drunken shenanigans venting about life and how they lived before they died, Husk had revealed that he apparently had a child somewhere that caused a small commotion of "YOU HAD A WHAT-" and that turned into Sir Pentious saying he missed his son,

Niffty brought up some guy she was obsessed with while alive that may or may not have died it wasn't clear, Vaggie revealed small, very small parts about her life in heaven and being an exorcist, Angel dust brought up his family that was in hell and his twin sister Molly who was the only one to go above, and even Alastor was in the conversation talking about his mother and what a wonderful mother she was.

And then it came to you, cradling a alcoholic beverage.

"I wish I knew what my life was like, like What did I do end up down here? I mean I know I died because of a rollercoaster but I don't think that was a sin." You said your fingers circling your glass, Angel dust patting your shoulder in support.

"I'm sure it wasn't anything that bad"

"You probably set orphanages on fire, I can see you doing that" Niffty chimed in staring into your soul

"Niffty what the hell."

You took a breath as music began to play, one of the things you don't expect in death is that everything becomes a musical.

"Some might say we're release, pushing daisies, deceased,"

You place the glass you were holding onto the table in front of you before standing up from the couch you wrapped your arms around yourself.

"But we all know the worms must be fed,"

"And They're singing." Husk muttered taking a swig of his drink as he was told to hush.

"There's just one lingering fear, Oh my soul, is it here?"

It was a silly question but was it? Most Hellborn supposedly didn't have souls but they were still alive in someway, was it the same case with you? Is that why you couldn't remember? Was your soul back on earth where you perished?

You let one of your hands drift up to your neck, feeling the thread stitching that kept your head attached to your neck, it was slightly lighter then the rest of your body, reminiscent of a dolls.

"Or is it rotting somewhere with my head?"

The people you mostly considered friends [Alastor was on a thin line of friend or weird smiley guy that lived in the hotel] watched you pace around.

"Oh my soul"

Who were you?

"Oh my soul"

What did you do? What didn't you do?

''Oh my soul''

What regrets did you have? Did you live life to the fullest? Who did you love, who did you cherish? Did you have friends? Family? Who were they?

"Oh my soul''

"Ooh...Ooh...Ahh...Ahh... ah''

You missed people you didn't even remember,

Were you loved? Hated?

Did someone miss you? Who did you die with? What did you do to end up here? Did you kill someone? Did you set an orphanage on fire like Niffty suggested?

The people that appeared in your dreams, who's faces were blurred, that would disappear when you tried to reach out to them, were they real or were they just from your dreaming state?

"Oh no soul, and no name"

Everyone had come up with their own nickname for you, typically something related to dolls like doll, Dollface, Dolly, Raggedy Ann, Raggedy Andy or Chucky etc

That last one was from Husk.

you didn't mind it but you desperately wanted to know what your name was, did you get to choose it? Or was it given to you? Did you like it? Did you want to change it? Did you go by a nickname instead? Was it long? Was it short? Was it fancy or simple? Were you named after someone? Oh how you desperately wished to know.

"And no story, what a shame.."

Was your life exciting? Dull? Did you wish for something more?

"Cruel existence was only a sham?"

Dying in a rollercoaster accident was odd, insane and tragic, you showed up in hell with a uniform, were you a student? Did you attend some weird uniform requiring college? You died with others you knew them didn't you? Did you die with strangers or did you die with people you knew?

Tears swelled in your glassy, shiny doll-like eyes

"Oh Saint Peter, let me in!"

Charlie and Vaggie shared a look, recalling the whole welcome to heaven thing and him straight up moaning in song.

"You must know where I've been, Won't you tell me at last who I am?"

You could bare it, being in hell, it was horrible because it was hell but everyone else knew who they were, somewhat, they had a name that they chose or got, they had some semblemblance of an identity,

So why didn't you?

"Who I am,"

It wasn't fair, it really wasn't

"Who I am"

Everyone in the room knew who they were, they remembered their lives or in Charlie's case her life so far.

"Who I am"

You didn't ask for much, you helped out at the hotel, you gleefully participated in the exercises, you were a decent person, at least now you were if you weren't before.

"Who I am"

Would you get your memories back if you went to heaven?

"Ooh...Ooh...Ahh...Ahh... ah"

Or would you completely lose your memories again, would you have to start all over again?

You didn't want to forget the folks in the hazbin hotel, they were your friends right?

Right?

It'd be one thing if you lost your memories here but it'd be just cruel if you lost them again, you didn't want to lose them again you desperately clung to the glimpses you got of the past, you needed to keep the memories of the present.

"And from the ground, beneath my feet, I hear the anguish of the street"

You glanced outside the window, people were doing whatever they did, someone was actively getting stabbed they probably remembered who they were.

"A choir never complete"

Something flashed in your head

You died in a choir, you were apart of a choir,

You were apart of something, you sung with them, were you all close? Were you like family?

Where were they? Would they recognize you if they saw you now?

Would they? Would you recognize them? Would all your memories come rushing back in an instant like in the movies?

"And like an old forgotten tune, a song that no one knows..."

A appeared in your arms, a doll that had been gifted to you by Angel dust for a day they had dubbed your birthday, they threw you a party and everything, confetti, balloons, cake, you got a few gifts that you treasured, from Charlie, sir Pentious, hell even Alastor gave you a weird doodle of you that laid with the other gifts.

You held it close to you.

"Forgot how it goes, just John, Jane and me"

You didn't name the doll John or Jane, you didn't know a John or a Jane, or maybe you did? Anyways you carried it around with you, finding it as a source of comfort for when your friends weren't nearby

"Forever eternally, Doll Doe"

You hugged the doll tighter as a tear slipped slid down your doll-like face,

You were angry, what had you done to deserve this? You should at least know what condemned you here? What sin was so bad to warrant this?

"And I'm askin' why lord,"

The effects kicked in as the room went darker as your voice raised, desperation, confusion.

"If this is how I die, lord"

Why couldn't you have a normal death at least! Did anyone even find your head? Was it eaten by animals? Did it hit some poor person trying to have a fun day at the amusement park?

"Why be left with no family"

The hotel residents began to develop a found family relationship, and you were apart of it, you loved it but, what was your family from before like? Did you even have one?

"And no friends?"

Assuming no one you knew had fallen down below, you didn't die alone but you came alone while the others had ascended to above.

"Ooh."

Background vocals came in out of nowhere lowkey freaking out some of your friends, Vaggie had already gotten her spear ready to Incase, of something maybe if the voices decided to attack

"I've got no celebration, just this consolation,"

Did you even have a funeral? Was it closed casket? Who attended?

"Time eats all his children, In the end"

You had questions and you wanted answers.

"Ahhh..."

Freaky disembodied background vocals

"A melody floats through the air, when silence falls, does no one care?"

You were human once, you didn't care what genre your life fell into, comedy, horror, tragedy, thriller, if you played the role of a villain or a hero, a funny side character, you just wanted to know

"Does anyone care?"

Where were the background vocals coming from, they were freaky.

"Another sad, forgotten tune"

Your story laid forgotten, abandoned on some bookshelf like a book a teenager brought thinking they'd like it but they couldn't even make it past the first page so it lays, rotting away.

"Another song that no one knows"

You wanted to go back, you wanted to live your life again, you didn't know what it entailed but you would do anything, make a deal, throw whatever afterlife you had away.

"So that's how it goes!''

No, you would keep the afterlife you were given, you cherished the memories you've made here.

"Just John, Jane and me"

Your life was cut short wasn't it? What didn't you get to experience, what didn't your choir experience?

Why did you all have to die that day? Why did the rollercoaster have to derail, why didn't they check it?

"Forever eternally, Dollface Doe"

"And she's asking why, lord?"

The disembodied voices were in all honesty a nice touch to the song, still freaky though especially since was now dolls scattered around the area, is that where the voices were coming from?

"Why, oh why, oh why, oh why...?"

Why?

You were the one who convinced your choir to go on the rollercoaster, you begged them offering to buy them snacks after,

They agreed, you didn't know.

Was that the thing that condemned you here??

"This is no way to die, lord!"

At least getting decapitated by a rollercoaster made for a good conversation starter, probably.

"No one to sing, no one to sigh"

You only got glimpses, sometimes a nostalgic feeling for something you couldn't remember no matter how desperately you wanted too.

"Now that all is said and done"

Life had ended, afterlife had only begun,

You couldn't go back, no matter what you did, even if you sold your soul, a soul you weren't sure you even had anymore.

"Isn't there anyone to tell me who I am?"

You were turned away from your friends, you didn't want to see the pitying face some of them probably had.

"No singing songs of celebration''

Were you someone who liked to party? A homebody? Were you a sweetheart? Did people say you had a heart of stone,

"Just this sorry speculation"

You could try and force yourself to remember but in the best case scenario you could get a glimpse and a headache, and the worse case you'd be left clutching your doll trying to comfort yourself with a horrible headache.

"Like John and Jane I'll be eternally"

Maybe you should give up on trying to figure out who you were, try to forget that you ever lived before this.

"A forgotten name, some lost refrain"

If anything, you didn't have to have your memories back completely, if you could just remember your name.

"Just 'Doll' "

You closed your eyes, clutching the doll.

"Dolly..."

The freaky dolls that appeared sneaked close, Vaggie stabbed one like a doll kabob

"Doe!"

You twirled and landed back in your seat, you leaned to the table to grab your drink again, intending to down it as the dolls finished your lament.

"A melody floats through the air, when silence falls, does no one care?"

The room began to lighten back up again as the creepy little dolls poofed away one by one, including the kabobbed one.

"Doll Doe."

You got a hug from a tearful Charlie and a two handed headpat from Angel since he couldn't really do anything else since you were trapped in Charlie's hug.

Charlie would later note that it was a successful trust exercise since everyone including you had opened up a little bit, you felt relieved to get that lament of yours off your chest, it didn't change much but breaking out in song was oddly therapeutic, you guessed that's why others did it so often!

Would you ever regain your memories? You didn't know, but for now you would try to remember anything from your past while making new memories with your friends at the Hazbin hotel.

Good evening folks! thank you for tuning on in, this has gotta be one of my favorite songfics to write to date, AGAIN I REALLY RECOMMEND RIDE THE CYCLONE, thank you for tuning in I hope you enjoyed! Goodnight folks!

[askbensolo]

Ask Ben Solo

What’s up, HoloNet! The name’s Ben. Currently 24 years old. I’m the only son of an Alderaanian princess and a Corellian scoundrel, and I have an adopted sister named Rey.

I started this blog when I was fifteen and afraid of becoming a Jedi. To make things worse, I started hearing voices in my head…voices that turned out to be someone who wanted to control me. Luckily, my friends and family got involved, and Snoke seems to have backed off.

I did make friends with some of Uncle Luke’s Jedi students, but I ended up attending the University of Naboo (Go Shaaks!) and got my degree in Journalism, since I’ve always been interested in writing, history, and politics. (Scroll back enough, and you’ll see my cringe pro-Imperial phase from back in the day. Yikes.)

I stayed on Naboo after graduation, and now I write for The Chommell Sector Daily. In my free time I lift weights, write poetry, and fight with people online.

Ask me a question!

—Ben

All Posts in Chronological Order

------

Run by @luke-shywalker Est. 2016

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Fannie’s Blog: @fanniepentarra

Amalia’s Blog: @mal-is-tall

(Their blogs are dead because they're lame, but maybe if we bother them enough they'll come back)

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Inktober 2016

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Family

Mom: My mother, also known as Senator Leia Organa, also known as Space Mom, also known as Don't Mess With Her. Tough as nails. Also has nice nails.

Dad: My father, also known as Han Solo (or scruffy-looking nerfherder). Isn’t as cool as you think he is, but makes up for it with heart.

Rey: My adopted sister, also known as "Kid". Ten years younger than me. Originally from Jakku. Eats faster than anyone I’ve ever seen.

Uncle Luke: My uncle, also known as Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. Is a cinnamon roll.

Ren the Bantha of Indeterminate Gender or Origin: My stuffed bantha friend. Not much can be known about this humble beast, but they are fiercely loyal.

Threepio: My mom's protocol droid. Has foregone enough memory wipes to pass as sentient. Best ignored.

Artoo: Luke’s beeping trash can. Extremely rude.

Chewie: My dad’s best pal. Gives great hugs. Don’t play holochess with him.

Lumpy: Chewie’s son. About my age in Wookiee years.

Darth Vader: My grandfather. It's complicated.

Friends

Fannie: One of Luke's Jedi students, who has since graduated. Twi'lek. My bestie when we were teens. Mom friend.

Amalia: One of Luke's Jedi students, who has since dropped out. Massive Togruta girl. Frenemy.

Treeso: My roommate from college. Gungan. Solid dude.

Sweeper: My archnemesis: the cleaning droid at work that keeps eating my paper notes.

Ugly Raisin Men Who Have Invaded My Mind With the Force

Snoke: Enough said.

Story Events

The Long Night: (2/25/16 - 4/2/16) In which I woke up from a nightmare and couldn’t sleep.

Space Braces: (5/16/16 - 12/7/2017) In which I got braces.

Get Out of My Head: (8/4/16 - 8/28/16) In which Mom left for a diplomatic mission and left me at home with my dad, and I was consumed by fear and darkness.

The Visit: (10/6/16 - 11/5/16) In which Uncle Luke came to visit us.

Sixteen!: (12/3/16 - 12/11/16) In which I turned sixteen.

Life Day 21 ABY: (12/25/16 - 12/26/16) Life Day!

The Impending Future: (9/10/17 - 9/29/17) In which I had an existential crisis about Mom wanting me to become a Jedi, and I discovered Snoke.

Seventeen!: (12/3/17 - 12/11/17) In which I turned seventeen.

Life Day 22 ABY: (12/25/17 - 12/26/17) Life Day!

A Week With Luke: (12/21/17 - 1/7/18) In which my mom made me spend a week at Luke’s Jedi school.

An Awkward Situation: (4/26/18 - 7/15/18) In which I thought my best friend Fannie was going to ask me out. Like, on a date.

About Amalia: (7/16/18 - 8/7/18) In which I accidentally started a chain of rumors about Amalia, Luke’s mysterious and hardest-to-get-along-with student.

The New Roommate: (4/24/24 - current) In which my roommate Treeso moves out and I have to find someone to take over his lease.

Recurring Tags Below

[courtney-deserved-better]

i wrote down all my thoughts episode by episode when i watched the new season. here they are. enjoy!

episode one

just from her intro priya is giving me courtney vibes

i love zee’s voice

ripper’s voice jumpscared me

LAUREN??? why does she have a baby voice

okay WHAT is going on between emma and chase

i love mk’s voice

wayne and raj are already annoying me

this cast is so bi

NICHELLE I LOVE YOU

julia’s intro is so fucking funny

wait its been 15 years and chris and chef look the exact same??

this is actually pretty funny/witty

MURDER HORNETS?? FROM THE EARLY PANDEMIC ERA??

millie is so fucking funny just writing down everyone being dumb though i do wonder if ppl are gonna find her reserach and turn on her like courtney’s list [prediction: correct]

okay wayne is still annoying but wearing a cup on total drama is the smartest move anyone has ever made

“straight couples amiright?” to “straight couples are messed up” 10/10 gay writing for bowie right there

bowie!! finally a smart elimination!! sorry caleb

episode two

emma bowie friendship is everything

SCARY GIRL UNDER THE STAIRS

axel you are everything to me

MK YOU ABSOLUTE GENIUS LISTENING TO PEOPLES CONFESSIONALS!!!!!

YES AXEL KICK HIM IN THE FACE

that’s probably gonna get her eliminated though [prediction: correct]

this pirate music is so fun

are priya’s parents friends with sierra’s mom or something

chris drew a shark on his hand to remember to release the sharks (but fr that doesn’t seem like og chris he wouldn’t have forgotten. its the old age)

scary girl vs the frogs of death… scary girl is gonna win. idk how but she will

ZEE IS GONNA WIN ON HIS OWN. PLEASE

nooooooooo

now zee or axel are gonna go home and i like them both :(

okay wayne and raj are getting less annoying and more endearing. surfer dudes vibes. also its cute how wayne calls raj rajy

okay that was kind of an awesome amputee reveal

sdlkfghjfdghjkfdls zee exploiting his disability to stay on the show. king.

NOOOOOOOO HOW DARE YOU CHOOSE RIPPER OVER AXEL. literally my least fav and my fav

yes!! bite him!!

episode three

nichelle as a flight attendant so cute!!

priya i love you. new favorite. millie as well their friendship is so cute

zee just out here lying. love that

raj bowie relationship??

wait nevermind

WAIT CANCEL THE NEVERMIND. MIND.

actually that’s so cute. wayne is just gonna be oblivious isn’t he [prediction: incorrect. extremely incorrect]

freckled intern is so cute

damien you are so smart and so dumb i love you

ripper really said sexism huh

scary girl is so one dimensional but so silly

there are bears living in the climbing wall????

chref married moment

mk i love you

new predicition priya is gonna prove herself to the team and do awesome but still not win and ripper is eliminated [prediction: incorrect]

mk you are so smart i love you

i love emma’s vengeance

raj you are having a gay awakening and i am HERE for it

new new prediction, damien will get himself voted out so he can leave

well he pretty much confirmed that as soon as i hit play again [prediction: correct?]

ZEE WORM MOMENT

i gotta say i do appreciate the openly gay character not to be the pining one

oof yeah i kinda saw this coming with nichelle

“cringe” okay fair bowie

WHAT IS SHE DOING WITH THAT BEAR

nichelle is having a fucking. existential crisis

goodbye nichelle :(

episode four

sdlkhgfjklsghfkdjs the arrow signs

chase is here to be awful huh

do they all have hydroflasks

millie and priya are so cute i love them

priya training millie is gonna be the death of this friendship, however [prediction: kinda correct?]

THE WAY SHE TURNED HER HEAD

zee you are so dumb i love you

THIS IS A CAPTURE THE FLAG EPISODE??? LIKE IN ICE ICE BABY?? FUCK YES

new prediction, scary girl is getting voted out for being scary [prediction: correct]

also why did chris announce her as lauren and then everyone’s called her scary girl

new prediction, mk is gonna win bc she’s good at stealing [prediction: kinda correct?]

since when is chef responsible

never mind he’s not

chref moment

okay wayne and raj have officially gone from annoying to endearing. i love them now

SHES DOING THAT THING WITH HER NECK AGAIN

mk scarlett moment lmao

RAJ AND BOWIE REALLY DID THAT HUH

yeah this is for sure raj’s gay awakening

ripper’s voice actor sounds so familiar i gotta look him up

YOURE TELLING ME WAYNE FIGURED IT OUT BEFORE RAJ??? WAYNE??? I THOUGHT HED BE OBLIVIOUS THIS WHOLE TIME??? but fr that was so cute im actually impressed with how theyre writing this whole thing because yknow. its total drama

ripper. please leave.

PRIYAS FACE. AUGH

nooooo scary girl. that was a great exit though. but millie why didn’t you vote with priya?? i know something’s up

“she took the skull?” “she took the skull” LMFAO

episode five

okay this priya millie thing is becoming a commando zoey arc [prediction: kinda correct?]

i love millie’s hair

damien is really campaigning against himself lmao. what if he wins that would be so fucking funny [prediction: incorrect]

nooooooo not the farting episode

animatronic raptors, im calling it [prediction: incorrect??]

what the FUCK is chase’s ass doing. horrifying

extreme bi zee moment

CHASE HOW DARE YOU BETRAY ZEE LIKE THIS

zee you are a genius i love you

wayne is so ready to be supportive this is so cute (im also shocked that they differentiated between gay and bi on fucking. total drama.)

them skating is so cute

AWWWW EMMA BOWIE HUG

mk’s tell all about the confessionals is gonna be shown as footage to make ppl maaaaaaaad [prediction: kinda correct?]

ITS THE FUCKING KITCHEN RAPTOR SCENE

julia is a dawnkota baby

MK YOU ABSOLUTE GENIUS

noooo justice for that raptor

holy shit damien. im actually starting to think you might win now [prediction: incorrect]

WHAT IS THIS BEACH SUNSET ROMANCE SCENE

new prediction: bowie and raj are gonna have a thing and keep it a secret and mk is gonna find out and air it like with julia’s video and then wayne is gonna be upset raj never got the chance to tell him [prediction: incorrect]

VOTE RIPPERS ASS OUT NOW HES BEEN ON THE CHOPPING BLOCK TOO MANY TIMES TO NOT LOSE NOW

WHAT NOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME I WANT RIPPER GONE. GONE!!!

so are they straight up not gonna explain the dinosaurs

episode six

sklhgjfkdshgfdjklshgjkflds chris yelling at the fans and chef reigning him in

millie and priya are gonna be the top wlw ship for this cast, they’ve gotta be

JULIA VILLAIN ARC

ripper sucks but “you cant slap a man with his own burrito” was fucking funny

THE LUCKY BEARDS WHAT

why is the hairball thing more funny than gross

mk you are becoming icarus babygirl [prediction: kinda correct?]

emma. destroy this man.

priya. destroy this man.

millie and priya are SO FLIPPIN CUTE

when would chef ever say safety first on og total drama. this is dramarama chef in the total drama universe

get wrecked chase

BIG CRAB BIG CRAB BIG CRAB

THE PUDDING SHARKS

bowie you are an icon i love you im so glad they didnt make you a pathetic guy

“its like im—“ like you’re what chris?? what?? 

WHAT WHAT KISS WHAT

WAYNE LMFAO

EVEN THE SHARKS SHIP IT

also its so cute how wayne is waiting for raj to tell him on his own terms even though he knows????

prediction: zee doesn’t make it to the 10k bc his leg falls off and messes with priya’s calculations [prediction: mostly incorrect]

zee is out here lyingggggg i love him

PREDICTION CANCELLED THE LEG HELPED HIM I LOVE YOU ZEE

“thats not how the laws of physics work” millie i love you

what the fuck is zee actually high

this episode is sooooooooo bowie/raj millie/priya

good fucking bye julia

nooooooo mk don’t let this happen i love her

bowie really said YEET

as he should that was smart

YES MK YOU GENIUS YOU CAN DO THIS

nooooooooooooo

anyway bowie’s little “i got kissed” thing was very cute

wait… mk is an alenoah baby

episode seven

priya/millie gives me bridgney vibes tbh

wayne you are such a sweet ally i love you

its merge time!

is this foreshadowing for an emma/priya finale? that would slap and we’ve never had an f/f finale before. i feel like there’s too much setup for them to get voted off before then though [prediction: half correct, half incorrect]

ripper you are so dumb how did you make the merge. fuck you man

chase and emma are getting stuck together aren’t they. sigh. [prediction: incorrect]

this is skave all over again. julia get chase outta here

oh thank god i thought there was gonna be bowie/raj/wayne trouble over partners but that was easy. friendship babey!!

wayne trying to be so hard to be supportive is actually the best drawn out plot line this show has ever had because its so dang wholesome

julia’s voice sounds familiar too gotta look her up

the zee & ripper cassowary scene is giving major noah & owen komodo dragon scene vibes

OH MY GOD THIS IS SO FREAKING CUTE??? AND HEALTHY??? RAJ TALKING ABOUT CONSENT AND BOWIE BEING REALISTIC ABOUT THE GAME I CANT

emma’s dance is so cringe but i appreciate the enthusiasm

jesus christ emma and chase CANNOT get back together

julia when the fuck did you get smart

did she just stare in horror at her hand having 5 fingers instead of four. what.

wait fuck why didn’t i see it before. priya is a zoerra baby

DID THEY JUST FUCKING. REPLICATE THE COURTNEY DEER RESCUE SCENE. WHAT.

they’re so gay i love them

THIS IS THE NOWEN KOMODO DRAGON SCENE

ripper you better fucking not who are you heather with all the times youve escaped immunity?? watching you go down is gonna be SWEET

what is this the rapa phooey episode

also GET FUCKED RIPPER

oh millie…

this is the fucking stepbrothers getting wrecked by that kangaroo

okay i wish that confession was better but it was very sweet

oh zee. what is happening

NOOOOOO DONT GET BACK WITH THAT DICK EMMA

NOOOOOOOOO

WAIT THE HOCKEY PLAYERS ARE LEAVING?? NOOOO

and not even a goodbye with bowie :(

them singing was pretty funny though

episode eight

zee you’re so silly i love you

bowie you’re so gay i love you. also the mouthguard gift was incredibly geoff of raj

why is the food rainbow and what was that cooking sequence

julia is having a real heather moment huh

bowie you are so right to diss chase

this is really just brunch of disgustingness isn’t it

damn millie really just dipped

…that’s why the food was rainbow

at least its less disgusting than actual puke colors

bummed bowie’s out already though

zee is gonna win this he’s gotta [prediction: incorrect :( ]

julia don’t do my boy zee like this

HA YOU CAN’T

are they having this wheel spin in the order of the rainbow

ZEE YOU ARE AN ICON

chase and emma. stop.

oh thank fucking god they did.

noooooo priya you trained for this

zee what do you mean you’ve never drank milk. zee. what.

noooooooo my boy

but actually its funny that MILK is the thing zee gets grossed out by because he knows nothing about it

HE JUST RAN OUT THE WALL

…THEY HAVE TO  EAT. A FUCKING T A P E W O R M ???????????????

that is not chef. chef would not tell chris to not serve the tapeworm

WHY DOES THE TAPEWORM GET A CONFESSIONAL

fucking. lady and the tramp moment. get wrecked ripper

why did we have to end with THAT

if millie gets out and not ripper. i will SCREAM

THANK FUCKING GOD GET FUCKED RIPPER

episode nine

wait this alliance is awesome actually

zee my beloved

double alliance zee moment. please let this be what makes him win and not what gets him booted

no this is soooooo foreshadowing for zee getting booted [prediction: correct]

this is so fucking dramarama chef he’s got the unicorn drink and everything

FISH SLAP THAT MOTHERFUCKER

the bears digging a grave lmaooooo

how many waterfall jumpscares can this show have

“why are you like this” best chef line

since when does chef care about the kids. what.

CHASE CRASHING INTO THE CONFESSIONAL LMAO

another fucking volcano. of course

leave his ass emma

and julia better not get immunity i stg

another bisexual zee moment. but buddy you are getting voted off for this :(

god damn it julia

chef chiding bowie was so funny

bowie why are you gunning for priya??

GET CHRIS’ ASS ZEE!! SERIOUS GAMECHANGER SURVIVOR EPISODE MOMENT

oh zee. buddy :(

slkjhfgdkjhgfdjksghfdkjslk zee pointing out the confessional nonsense

episode ten

priya with a bun!! so cute!!

MILLIE WITH A PONYTAIL

carry me?? puppy eyes?? girlfriends. girlfriends.

okay im vibing with this challenge

everyone saying no to switching poles with chase is so funny he’s so lame

i love watching everyone slowly lose it

why is everyone so obsessed with letting priya read millie’s notebook. poor writing methinks

“skewer the children”

i would win this challenge. btw.

bowie’s gonna stir up drama isn’t he

THE PHONE please be usable

please dont let this be the end of priya and millie

emma punching everyone lmao

awww we still get raj/bowie

noooo priya

julia if you win immunity 3 times in a row. well that’s just poor writing

chase you are god awful

YOW CHASE

aww dancing emma

chase gets eliminated this episode bc everyone know how much he sucks calling it [prediction: correct]

what the fuck was that dive

GIRL NO

PRIYA AND MILLIE AWWW

nooo bowies gonna get millie out [prediction: technically correct? but much later on?]

i love chef chastising everyone 

why are there only 4 marshmallows 

THANK GOD GET FUCKED CHASE

noooooooooooooo emma why

they really said the final five is for the girls and gays 

episode eleven

PRIYA MILLIE GIRLFRIENDS this is such s5 gwourtney energy

evil julia behind the door lmao

bowie is right to be annoyed emma wtf

bowie does NOT get out like this. if its him or emma emma’s gotta go [prediction: correct]

okay i know its a selfie challenge but this is creative and fun i like it

elimination prediction: emma/millie, julia, priya v bowie finale [prediction: mostly correct]

smart move emma. also chris sending ppl stuff in a group chat for a challenge is so funny to me

emma don’t betray my boy bowie like this for your garbage bf

priya and millie ragging on julia we love to see it

wait numbers wise there’s gotta be a double elim. and if its priya and millie ill cry

emma please get eliminated now

emma you suck

please don’t let that pic of priya disqualify her

nooooooo priya and millie :( bowies gotta win this

julia just waltzing through the challenge lmao

GET HER ASS RAPTOR

noooooo bowie 

god dammit julia

wait nvm good on you for turning it against emma

only three marshmallows??

FUCK YES BOWIE

wait the immune person doesn’t get a marshmallow nvm

girl you are delusional 

episode twelve

millie is adorable

aww priyas pjs

shut julia downnnnn

bowies plan is actually so good 

julia bun!! cute!!

chef talking ab the monster lol

love all these two person confessionals

priya you absolute girlboss

stop throwing millie tokens!!

ooooooo bowie blowup

julia do NOT win this

awwwwwww millie

everything about this priya millie plot line is incredible 

GET FUCKED JULIA

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

HA GET FUCKED JULIA

uh oh that gift is the notebook

bowie you ICON

episode thirteen

awwwww millie

priya having a courtney moment

THEYRE BACK!! CUTE RAJ/BOWIE MOMENT and eww emma chase

damien good choice

ripper rippppppppp

nooooooo axel. julia is unfortunate 

girl brought a CONTRACT

why is ripper lowkey helpful

NICHELLES FACE axel i love you

damien you’re so supportive i love you

LAVA LAKE WHAT

bowie i love you

the popcorn lmao love the commentary 

awwww raj 

love the angry betrayed priya energy she’s like the new courtney

MY FINAL TWO PREDICTION WAS RIGHT

bowie that was COLD

THAT APOLOGY WAS BEAUTIFUL 

wayne and raj crying awww

this really is season 3 finale 

what is this spongebob music while bowie talks about eating goat

new chef is just og chef

these milk drinking shots are horrible 

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSA FIRST EVER TIME MY FAV WON

awww raj and bowie

i legit think this is my favorite season of total drama ever :’)

[empressofmankind]

So, funny story-

And by funny, I mean mostly embarrassing and definitely confronting.

My mom dropped by for coffee today. And, hawk-eyed in that way, mothers often are, immediately spotted the new addition to my not insubstantial collection of figurines.

And she went: "You still watch that?"

No judgemental tone or anything, just, seemingly honestly surprised. Meanwhile, I was having an existential crisis. Because, what do you say to that?

"Yes. It's > 1000 episodes running and I've watched it since I was literally a tween," (a lie, technically)

Or,

"No, actually, I just recently rolled back into it because they made a live action, didn't fuck it up, and cast someone competent and my age and forced him into playing my type?" (the mildly embarrassing truth)

Both answers seemed like terrible options to me for different reasons.

In the end, my poor brain went with:

"Yes, no, sort of."

Sigh.

That wasn't the worst of it though - this is just a long-winded lead up to the actual point I wanted to relay. Because in response to that disaster of an answer I gave, she just smiled fondly. That way mothers do when they remember you being an embarrassingly endearing child in front of them.

She looked at the lil Buggy figurine and smiled.

And said.

AND. SAID.

"You were all about that boy when you were that age."

Turns out, twelve-year-old me had a baby crush on equally twelve-year-old Buggy.

Bury me. I died.

I got around to, over coffee, telling her about what the deal is with the recent clown art (she was wondering) - and that this is, in fact, the adult version of said boy. And that I have no real memory of the whole tween crush thing. This amused her greatly, and she assured me it was absolutely a whole darn thing.

And honestly, if I were her, I'd find it pretty hysterical too?

Way back when your child was a baby, crushing on this cartoon baby. Isn't that the absolute cutest? Zip forward several decades, and you find out that your now adult-ass child completely (consciously) independently of said baby crush just wound up crushing on the same (fictive) person all over again, now also an adult.

You couldn't make that shit up if you tried.

I mildly dread Christmas already.

[aprillikesthings]

*squints at a 1967 calender*

Monterey Pop was June 16th to the 18th

Adora et al would've left about a day and a half before it started because they drove straight there and Bow and Glimmer took turns driving

I want Catra to arrive to SF the evening of the 20th and she hitch-hikes so it takes about the same amount of time (24-36 hours)

(lol I'm aware that's ....actually unrealistic, considering that on the Monterey Pop recording, one of the members of Big Brother and the Holding Company said it took 50 hours to hitch-hike from Texas and said that was relatively fast, but WHATEVER)

anyway

my BRAIN

(it's fine it's fine I have it figured out but good LORD)

uh, spoilers under the readmore?

also if I'm not mistaken, I've set it up so the day that Adora is silently having an existential crisis about "wait I think I'm gay," is the same day Catra leaves her mom's house to start hitch-hiking to SF. That wasn't on purpose lol

[casliveblog]

Custom Toonami Block Week 153 Rundown

Spy X Family: Fiona gets her big mission with Loid and we get a neat little loredump about the War which I’m all in favor of, this world could use a bit of fleshing out. So apparently at the end of World War X there was a guy that was just like ‘okay everyone let’s just forget all the war crimes both sides have committed and make peace’ but he also kept a ledger of all the fucking human atrocities both sides did and if it ever becomes public EVERYONE’s gonna be pissed and the clue to finding it is in a painting that’s a prize for an underground Tennis tournament… is it just me or does this sound like a Lupin the Third plot? Anyway yeah Fiona and Loid are a a fake married couple literally named Phony and blast through the tournament because apparently actually knowing how to play tennis is no match for whatever the fuck WISE training does to a person. Like some of these matches make The Prince of Tennis look downright sensible for as wacky as that series was. But yeah by the time of the Finals we’re dealing with rocket powered tennis rackets, tennis whips and drugging as well as a collapsible course but they’re no match for the power of a yandere and the six million dollar man, so let’s see how much blatant cheating happens next time.

Inuyasha: So Inuyasha gets the page from Kikyo’s cherubs and Kikyo’s just like ‘bro this is a fucking trap, Naraku’s gonna steal Kagome’s eyes, don’t send her with you to attack Abi’ and that’s kind of a problem because they need Kagome to find the fucking jewel shard in the first place and Kikyo’s solution is to just go kill Naraku right now which sounds cool but she’s basically already half dead and she was already kind of half dead before so she’s like three quarters dead so she has to give up and go ‘fine here’s an extra magic dirty arrow for her then’ which is kind of nice that Kikyo’s seeing Kagome as a more competent ally after she saved her life and their relationship is developing beyond the Inuyasha love triangle. There’s a small moment of ‘Kagome’s upset because Kikyo was mentioned’ but luckily Inuyasha cuts it short by saying it was all business and gives Kagome the arrow. Meanwhile Naraku comes to visit Abi and Tekkei and is like ‘hey bros, heard you gave my castle the good succ, your mom all better now? Can she come out and play?’ and Tekkei pops out of the mountain and just fucking eats Naraku in her giant bird form. Which like, idk if that’s a good idea like even if you COULD digest Naraku he’s literally MADE OF POISON like they watched him stand in the poison that made Tekkei sick to begin with and then gas bomb the brothers of the demon that poisoned Tekkei, no wonder she needed so much human blood if she just keeps eating every poisonous thing she comes across like a damn housecat. But yeah Inuyasha and co. get there but Abi and Tekkei don’t get to gloat about being the new series antagonists too long because turns out being eaten didn’t even scratch Naraku and he just rips his way out of her head and blows off Abi’s arm by self-destructing the bone trident (note: do not use the weapon made out of the bones of the guy you’re trying to kill on said guy, if he can manipulate his bones into a trident he can probably take it back) but yeah Abi’s reward for helping Naraku kill her mom is a painless death and now Inuyasha’s group and Naraku both get to go to the afterlife thanks to Tekkei’s magic phoenix hell blood or whatever.

Yu Yu Hakusho: The Three Kings Arc is to my understanding an arc of ‘Well, what now? Why are we still doing this?’ it’s a shonen series having an existential crisis of why it’s still going after all its story beats have been filled, like if the Buu Saga was self aware about how pointless it was. And that theme really starts coming in as we get the second half of Hiei’s backstory as he fights Shigure. After he was yeeted as a baby he was taken in by some ogre bandits and flashed his Mom Bling around to purposely start fights and kill anyone that tried to take it, but turns out people don’t like it when you’re just fucking killing everyone so the bandits kick him out and he loses his Mom Bling in a fight and has to go to Shigure to get the Jigan Eye implant and learns a bit more about swordplay. We cut back to the fight against Shigure and turns out it’s over pretty quick, like one pass does it in classic samurai movie fashion but it’s pretty cool how they choreograph exactly what happens and how Hiei sacrifices his arm to parry Shigure’s sword and take his arm while using the backswing to cut off part of his head, it’s quick but it’s basically what you imagine happens whenever they do one of those ‘they run past each other and someone explodes in blood’ deals. Mukuro gives Hiei back his Mom Bling and Hiei’s like ‘yeah guess I’ll die’ since he’s missing an arm and got ripped open a bit in that fight. Turns out he found his original village already before the events of the story but decided the best revenge was letting them all live in the emotionally stunted hell they created for themselves, though Rui does tell him about Yukina and he’s just like ‘guess that’s a good new life mission for now’ and he finds Yukina along the course of the series and her finally trusting him enough to give him her stone put him at peace enough that he’s just feeling done and is just like ‘okay I’ve run out of life missions, time to die’ which seems kind of abrupt but like I said, the theme of searching for meaning after a climax is kind of the point of this arc. Either way Mukuro puts Hiei in her rejuvenation chamber and strips naked to show off her horribly scarred third of her body yet somehow completely immaculate ass and is like ‘here’s a titty Hiei, we’re gonna do fights and shit so don’t worry I got another life mission for you’. Which you know, fair, titties will restore your will to live even if she only has one intact one.

Jujutsu Kaisen: After all the main bad guy shit and Chunin Exam character shenanigans we’re back to a mission of the week arc which is kinda nice, always felt like some of these shows ramp up too fast and don’t give enough of these (that aren’t just filler) to get us into a good fleshing out spot with the characters. Speaking of fleshing out, it’s Megumi time (personally think Nobara could use a hit of character fleshing at this point but Megumi’s good too) the new mission brings him back to his middle school and Nobara and Yuji realize how little they know about their local Sasuke. Seems a Cursed Spirit is doing an It Follows and leaving peoples’ doors open and killing them two weeks later and they track it down to people who were in school together and it turns out that Megumi’s bedridden sister is among the potential victims within a week’s time and since Gojo’s on his ‘I’m too strong so they keep sending me on vacation to balance me’ retreats it’s up to the main trio to exorcise the spirit to save Megumi’s sister and also all the other people we’re supposed to care about. It’s nice to see the main trio working together again given they didn’t have a lot of time together between when they started and Yuji’s death and then everything at the Chunin Exams was basically separate character studies so it’s nice to have a simple relatively low-stakes activity where they kill a whack a mole and his friend with too many mouths.  

Zom 100: THE TITTIES ARE HERE, THE TITTIES ARE HERE!!! It’s kinda funny how ridiculously brief Beatrix’s introductory period is, like she just kinda slides right into the group like she’s been there all along. She makes a fantastic first impression by basically aligning with Akira’s philosophy and being a samurai and actually bringing a fucking weapon to the zombie apocalypse instead of trying to punch the zombies out or find a new method to dispatch them each time, it’s like when Michonne was first introduced in The Walking Dead and we got that neat rush of someone who actually knows what the fuck they’re doing in melee combat (also helps since because this is in Japan guns are ridiculously unlikely to play any major role). But yeah she’s a German weeb with big tits who just wants to see the land of anime and sushi for herself, though she does seem to be more interested in the legitimate cultural heritage and knowledgeable about it as such rather than your standard pop culture loving tourist. But yeah there’s a fun mission about getting fish to a sushi artisan to get an all you can eat pass and Shizuka gets to pull out her inner Zhou Yu which was a lot of fun to see considering I’m playing Samurai Remnant right now. Then there’s a standard hot springs episode because we have the full fanservice roster now so we can get straight to the gimmick episodes without worrying about Shizuka bearing the whole brunt of that. I like how we get the titty girl and IMMEDIATELY jump to the plot that strips the girls naked, though I also appreciate how there’s significantly less sexual tension about the group being naked around each other partially because they’re not hormonal teenagers that squirm from brushing a boob and also half of Japan has seen Kencho’s dick by now so while they’re not just gonna strip for each other it’s less weird and taboo than it is in most anime and it’s nice. There’s also some good shipping fuel for Akira and Shizuka where she shoots down his romantic ideas again but apologizes about it later and talks about how her relapsing into her father’s ideology is mostly a reflex of regret for having lived like that and trying to justify the resentment by claiming she was right all along even though deep down she really has changed, which is kind of a neat touch like her progress isn’t a straight line but it’s also not like her character refuses to change for the joke of her being the stick in the mud. She wants validation that the way she lived her life up till now was worth it but also knows that she’ll be freer if she cuts ties with it and starts living today rather than regretting how she used to be. And then Beatrix gets her tits out and I forget what I’m even talking about, 10/10 episode.

Ranking of Kings: Time for a good old wrap-up episode, Bosse’s soul shows Daida the final part of his backstory with Miranjo as he’s giving him back control of his body. Miranjo was basically suicidal after the whole thing with her mom and the village being burned down and being mutilated but over time they healed enough of each other’s wounds to keep living toether and Miranjo felt like Bosse had given up on his own dreams to take care of her which is literally not what he said but okay. So they challenge the regional god and he fucking kicks Bosse’s ass so Miranjo goes to an old demon friend and it turns out the more wishes a demon grants the more demony they become and Miranjo promised to never ask anything of the demon but breaks that now for Bosse’s sake which now comes with the penalty of robbing Bojji of all strength in order to double Bosse’s power where he finally kills the regional deity and establishes the kingdom and all that shit but he feels really shitty about it and then dies which kickstarts Miranjo’s plan to revive him through Daida even after Bosse is like ‘oh yeah take care of my son for me’ and we make it perfectly clear Miranjo has only been hearing what she wants to from Bosse’s speeches. But yeah back in the present they manage to sucker punch the demon into granting them a wish but instead of Despa wanting to save Ouken, Bojji and Daida agree to wish to save Miranjo. (Which may have been for the best because if you just remove Ouken’s immortality while he’s still a goo marble inside the rock does he just turn into a mortal goo marble and fucking die in the most painful way possible?) But yeah turns out Daida’s a pretty cool person now, like he hasn’t done a lot in the plot but he’s grown tremendously as a character and it’s good to see. That being said, it’s still weird as fuck to have him ask Miranjo to marry him, like sure, take your father’s Daughter-Wife and make her your Mom-Wife, I’m sure Freud will fucking love that, everyone’s suitably weirded out by this but it still comes out of nowhere though it does have the added effect that no one can come after Miranjo for all the shit she did because she’s now the Queen Regent so yeah. Hilling has a nice scene of marveling at how her sons have grown and Desha hears Plan Demon has failed so he’s switched to Plan Eldritch Relic From the Divine Vault that Kills Everyone (it’s the second plan, they didn’t get around to editing the name) so yeah the arc’s wrapped up nicely but there’s still enough plot threads to pull on from here.

Vinland Saga: Picking up right after Askeladd and Bjorn’s duel, it’s time for Thorfinn to fight but he’s hesitating, seeing a small bit of humanity in Askeladd but also blinded by rage enough like he always is so Askeladd kicks his ass bare-handed and he’s just like ‘man this is getting old, they could legit just reuse animation from our past four fights dude’ and it looks like Askeladd almost considers actually killing Thorfinn for a moment and burning all bridges from his life as a Viking but Canute stops him and wakes Thorfinn the fuck up. Askeladd just sits down and is like ‘alright bitches, you want some Count of Monte Cristo shit, HERE’S how you kill a father figure’ and gives his full backstory, some of which we already know. Askeladd was the bastard son of a lord and had a crazy sick slave mom who was a King Arthur fangirl and to avoid her being killed he fights his Lord Dad and does pretty fucking well for his first time ever holding a sword so Lord Dad’s like ‘good killing skills, my sperm is strong in you’ and takes him in. And for two years he trains and builds up trust before killing Lord Dad and Lady Step-Mom in their sleep and pinning it on one of the legitimate kids. So yeah moral of the story, if you hate your father figure and want to kill him don’t be a pussy and just fucking do it. No but really, the real moral is the general theme that’s been going through the whole arc that waiting for paradise won’t save anyone, and that only by working to take it here on Earth can anyone be saved. Askeladd ends off by telling Thorfinn off and telling him there was never any real chance of him beating him and humoring him is just the dues he felt he had to pay to get a useful member of the crew and that if anything he’s thankful to Thors for wrapping Thorfinn in such hate in turmoil that he chained Thorfinn to Askeladd for ten years. And that just kinda hits Thorfinn with the ‘what have I been doing with my life’ truck as he’s kind of known for a while this wasn’t what his father wanted but still can’t get over the grief and rage propelling him forward. Canute asks Askeladd why he doesn’t just become king without him and Askeladd’s just like ‘bro did you hear my backstory just now? I murder everyone I disagree with, you really want that as king?’and it’s specifically Canute’s reluctance towards fighting that makes Askeladd believe in him as a leader and believes he’s too old and too embroiled in warrior culture to properly be anything but an advisor. But yeah Thorfinn’s in a bad way and I think/hope that this will finally be the chance for him to reflect on what he wants and not just scream and stab things all the time.

[sightless-raiton]

Fun story, my mom's a college professor, so I've gotten used to this reaction over the course of my life. When I was not even 5 and she had to bring me in to sit at the back of one of her classes because I was too sick to go to daycare and dad had to work. Her whole class of 20 something undergrads staring at me occasionally while I slept and my mom kept an eye on me. All of them so confused at the tiny? person? Who apparently belonged to the grad student teaching them that they don't even think of as that much older than them?

The dude I met when I was nine and my family was abroad because my mom had a teaching position in Tunisia, and the guy was the only person at the 'work party' who both spoke english and felt bad there were no kids there I could interact with. He was a grad student I had a long conversation with about computer games on almost an equal level before I gave him an existential crisis when I said I'd never played a game he mentioned because it came out the year I was born, and my mom telling me later I kind of freaked him out because he could remember that year?? To him it was "not that long ago... right?? I'm a young guy, right???"

When I was in highschool and my mom, stepdad, and I were all going out to dinner after my mom's last class of the day, and I sat in the back and watched because they were just viewing an old black and white film that day, and again the students were weirded out that their professor had a kid almost their age.

When I was an early 20 something almost whenever I helped my mother with groceries when my former classmates bagging groceries or running register would recognize my mom and talk briefly about class before spotting me and suddenly turning awkward. Or I'd run into a friend from highschool and they'd talk about a class they were taking my mom taught and how odd it was for them having her as a teacher.

When I entered the workforce and made friends who were all five or more years older and we'd have those moments OP was describing.

Six years later when we were getting new employees at a different job and talking about previous workplaces the new kid I'd been really getting along with double taking and staring at me before saying "oh yeah, you did, didn't you" because when I had my first retail job he was attending middle school nearby and all his friends would shoplift candy bars or sodas from the store. I'd even been the one to once catch his older brother stealing a bag of chips.

Now I'm in my early 30s and just last month my mom and I spoke about how her current batch of students are young enough they have no real memories of the world before 9/11.

Point is, do this. Laugh at it - inside, at least - and while there is nothing wrong with it, don't forget: eventually it'll happen to you.

having friends notably older than you is fantastic actually, cause you can drop in a little mention of how old you would have been at the time of a story they tell and watch the existential crisis set in

[yutaholic]

flipside (M)

PAIRING: Mark (NCT) + reader (female)

GENRE: the bet; buckle up buttercup; smut

SUMMARY: When your father moves you overseas for his job, you are determined to hate it until you discover the illegal street races happening after nightfall. Boys are quick to vie for your attention, but none catch your eye like Mark, who takes you on the ride of a lifetime.

WARNINGS: strong language; mild alcohol use; explicit sexual content

NOTES: 21k words; listening to flipside by lana del rey

“How long are you planning to sulk out there?”

You ignored your father, chin raised high in defiance. Indefinitely, you replied in your mind. Or until you had come to terms with your new life.

Which, as far as you were concerned, was never.

He sighed in defeat. At least you were wrapped up in your favorite blanket. It would keep you warm in the wintry night air as you sat on the tiny balcony attached to your room, staring with hatred at the city around you.

Busan, you thought with disdain. There was no way you could be happy here. It was too crowded for one, but more importantly, despite how tightly packed it was with people, you didn’t have a single friend.

You had never felt so alone.

When your father received a well-deserved promotion at his job and told you that you would be moving with him overseas, you honestly didn’t believe it. There was no way in hell he would uproot you from the only life you’d ever known to relocate to a different country.

Especially after the death of your mother.

Your first thought was to move out, but you couldn’t afford it. Not when you were fresh out of college and trying to get into a good doctorate program. Your father suggested you take a year off to adjust yourself to Busan and resume your studies when you were comfortable. An offer you accepted out of spite.

Spite had become your dominant emotion of late. You had been close to your father once, but neither of you handled the loss of your mom well and you slowly but surely drifted apart.

It was almost easier that way.

Suddenly, you heard your name called from the door, followed by, “Chungha is here.”

Broken from your reverie, you asked, “Who?”

“My co-worker’s daughter, remember? She offered to show you around and help you get the hang of things.”

Oh, he was serious about that. You snorted back a chuckle. “No thanks.” Shaking your head, you huffed, “I’m sulking.”

“Well, turn that frown upside down,” came an unfamiliar, overly perky voice.

Brow furrowed, you turned around slowly.

A pretty girl with long blonde hair stood in the doorway of your balcony. She was dressed for the bitter cold nights, warmed by a long black coat and knee-high leather boots. You were tempted to ask if she was late for a Vogue shoot, but you held your tongue.

“I’m Chungha,” she greeted sweetly, holding out her hand. “You can call me Chungha.”

The humor bounced right off of you, but you would never be rude to someone that had done you no wrong. You stood, careful to keep your blanket wrapped around you, and shook her offered hand politely, but you gave her your name with complete disinterest.

She tilted her head coyly. “Someone is not happy.”

You absolutely adored her accent. If you didn’t know any better, you would think she was American. It was getting harder and harder to stay perturbed at her for interrupting your existential crisis. “What gave me away?” you droned.

Chungha put her hands on her hips, dropping the niceties. “Listen, darling. If you wanna have attitude, I can give you a run for your money,” she said with a hint of warning.

You smirked in amusement and decided that Chungha was to be respected. “You have my attention.”

“Good. Now come inside. It’s fucking freezing.”

You closed the patio door behind you and tossed your blanket onto a nearby chair. Your bedroom was white and bland, with a potted plant sitting in the corner as the only pop of color. Brown boxes covered almost the entire floor. You hadn’t amassed enough motivation to unpack yet.

“You’re in denial,” Chungha quipped, crouching down to look inside an open box.

You asked curiously, “Why are you here?”

Chungha plunked down on the edge of your bed, crossed her legs, and replied, “Believe it or not, I was the new girl once too. Years ago. Someone vouched for me and helped me make friends and I wouldn’t be who I am today without that.”

“Sounds almost too good to be true,” you said, folding your arms.

“You’ve obviously got spunk and you’re super cute. I think you could fit in around here if you would just give it a chance.”

Given how pretty she was, the compliment made heat fill your cheeks, but you were stubborn to the end. “Why do you care?”

Chungha shrugged, but a smile tugged at her lips. She could tell by the softening of your tone that she was wearing you down little by little. “It literally costs nothing to be kind.”

You heaved a big sigh, accepting a temporary defeat. Curiosity was the only thing that could beat your obstinance. “What do you have in mind?”

“You’re in luck. It’s Friday and the gang will be together tonight. I would love to introduce you. What do you say?”

The last thing you wanted to do was go out into the world and all its unknown. You were determined to be angry at your father by locking yourself in your room and refusing to bond with your new city. But Chungha’s invitation gave you an idea. Going to a party and getting drunk and shoving your tongue down a boy’s throat could also be a convenient and effective revenge against your father.

“I’m down,” you told her.

Chungha clapped her hands together and leapt up, asking, “Which boxes have your clothes?”

You gestured around the room like perhaps she hadn’t noticed it looked like a tornado swept through.

Thirty minutes later, give or take, your entire wardrobe was piled on the bed.

Chungha tossed a pair of socks over her shoulder and said, “You should definitely wear something sexy.”

You snorted. “Sure. Let me just whip out my matching lace bra and panties.”

Chungha shook her head, holding up two of your jackets and comparing them, and quipped, “Trust me. Guys don’t want lingerie. They want mini skirts with thigh-high socks.”

“Noted.”

Of course, you were no stranger to what boys wanted. Most of them would settle for a warm body.

Chungha treated you like her new favorite doll and you were surprised by how much it distracted you from your anger. One article of clothing after another, you eventually stepped out of the bedroom in an all-black ensemble. Complete with a mini skirt and thigh highs.

Pulling on a cropped hoodie over your tee, you stood patiently as Chungha layered three long necklaces and slipped them over your head. They would draw attention to your cleavage, she said. Glancing you over, satisfied with her work, Chungha asked, “Ready to go?”

“When you are,” you replied blandly, but you were eager to get drunk. She didn’t need to know that though. She just needed to give you a ride home afterward.

Leading you out of your room, Chungha nearly collided into you when she whipped around and said, “Just one more thing - how do you feel about fast cars?”

It was the very last thing you expected.

The night was alive, the sun long gone. Music was blaring from all directions. Cars revved their engines. The scent of cigarettes and booze filled the air. The chatter of a dozen different conversations buzzed in your ears.

“Now, this is a distraction,” you mused to yourself.

Chungha held your hand as she led you between cars. A few boys whistled at you or tried to steal your attention with lewd noises and gestures, but you were attached at the hip to Chungha, who stuck up her middle finger to them all.

“Don’t worry. They won’t mess with us,” she told you loudly over the noise. “They’re scared shitless of my boyfriend.”

You chuckled at that.

Chungha parted from you to slip into the burly arms of a tall boy standing by an electric green muscle car. He didn’t hesitate to kiss her, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist and squeezing a handful of her ass. You glanced away awkwardly and waited.

She stole a cute kiss or two from her boyfriend before remembering you, waving you forward and saying, “This is Jaemin.”

“Hi,” he greeted with a broad, charming smile.

“Hello,” you replied, giving him your name.

Jaemin had jet black hair with flames buzzed in his undercut. They matched the designs on the hood of his car to perfection. Which led you to assume that cars weren’t just a hobby for these boys, but a way of life. Jaemin gave you an equally scrutinizing look before turning to Chungha, drawing her flush against him and chiding playfully, “You brought a total stranger to our den?”

“She’s new to town and looking for trouble. She’s not exactly happy to be here,” Chungha told him, giving you a wink.

Jaemin was quick to joke, “Then she definitely hasn’t tried the food yet.”

You scoffed back a laugh. But the vibe of the place was already growing on you.

Boys blew pillars of smoke into the air, cigarettes hanging from their lips or vapes held between their fingers. Alcohol was flowing freely among everyone except the drivers, for obvious reasons. One of them spotted you and your empty hands and tossed you a can of hard seltzer without a word.

Speaking of drivers, some of them were already talking shit to each other over the upcoming race. As you opened the can and put it to your lips for a sip, you chuckled as they squabbled like a flock of birds.

Girls strutted by in their skin-tight jeans and low-cut shirts, despite the cold. It was hard to feel the chill with all the exhaust and smoke and bodies packed together. The lights of the city shone brightly against the pitch black sky, illuminating the old parking lot where the pre-race party was underway.

“See anyone you like?” Chungha asked cutely, nudging your hip with her own.

You shook your head. To be honest, all of the boys that puckered their lips at you or eye-fucked you from across the way looked like they would blow their loads in thirty seconds or less.

And though you weren’t opposed to getting laid, you’d be damned if you gave it up to any of these self-absorbed little pricks.

A clamor suddenly rang out within the crowd and cheers filled the air as a sleek black car turned the corner and roared into the lot. You rolled your eyes at the noise, but did a double-take at the boy that stepped out of the car.

He wasn’t just good-looking. He was fine.

Interested, you leaned into Chungha and asked, “Who’s that?”

“Ah, that’s Mark. He’s on a huge winning streak right now. Super competitive,” she told you offhandedly.

“And arrogant,” Jaemin snipped.

Chungha playfully scolded, “He is not. Don’t listen to him.” She put her hand on Jaemin’s chest and gave him a few sympathetic pats. “He’s just bitter that Mark beat him last weekend. They’re really close.”

Her words faded into the background of noise. Your eyes were stuck on Mark. You couldn’t look away no matter how hard you tried. And you were biting and chewing your lip like you were about to dig into a hot meal after weeks of dieting. You watched him greet some of the other guys, but pay no mind to the girls. Which piqued your curiosity.

Then, the unthinkable happened. Mark noticed you. Staring at him shamelessly.

Despite the distance, Mark locked onto you like a heat-seeking missile. His eyes raked up and down your body, and he cocked his head, probably wondering, Why haven’t I seen this girl before?

You cleared your throat and turned away, asking Chungha some mundane question so you could appear unbothered and ignore the hard thumping of your heart.

The cars began rounding up. A makeshift starting line was drawn on the cracked asphalt with chalk. Jaemin hopped into his car and fired up the engine, catching you off guard with how loudly it roared to life.

Chungha squeezed your hand and told you excitedly, “Just sit tight. I have no doubt someone will ask you to ride with them.”

You waved goodbye as Chungha slid into Jaemin’s car, giggling when you saw her clamber over and press the most aggressive kiss on his lips.

Well, that was one surefire way to wind him up.

Meandering out of the way with the crowd, lining up to watch the start of the race, you searched briefly for Mark, having lost sight of his black car in the commotion. Disappointment felt heavy in your chest. Part of you hoped he would come and sweep you off your feet for the night.

“I call dibs on the new girl,” said Jeno, flicking his lighter repeatedly.

You opened your mouth to decline, but Mark appeared at your side, taking your hand and slipping it to the crook of his elbow. “But new girl already called dibs on me,” he purred.

The surrounding boys erupted into whistles and laughs, a few making sounds at Jeno’s expense. You could only liken them to a pack of rabid hyenas.

But who cared? Mark was even handsomer up close. You kept your composure and let Mark lead you to his car parked at the starting line, a little surprised when he opened the passenger door for you. Very gentlemanly of him.

“So…,” Mark began as he settled in his seat, revving the engine. “How are you liking Busan?”

“I hate it,” you replied without missing a beat.

Surprise flickered over Mark’s face and he chuckled at your blunt attitude. His eyes inevitably fell to your bare thighs. The mini skirt had slipped back a bit and you’d made no moves to adjust it. “Really?” he asked.

You grumbled, “It wasn’t my idea to move here.”

Mark reached over, grabbing your seatbelt and yanking to make sure it was taut. The action made you jolt in surprise, unsuspecting. “Ever been in a street race before?”

You stared straight ahead, heart picking up speed. Having been distracted by Mark and how goddamn attracted you were to him, you’d neglected to fully realize you were about to be a passenger in a very illegal race. “Nope.”

It certainly satisfied your spiteful cravings.

Mark revved the engine again and again, and teased under his breath, “You’re pretty calm for a virgin.”

You finally turned your head, meeting his eyes, and flirted, “You better win. I would hate to have a bad first time.”

Mark flashed a grin of perfect teeth. “Don’t you worry, baby,” he said, voice deepening. “Sit back, relax and enjoy the ride.”

You braced your hands where you could when he slammed his foot on the gas and took off, knocking the air out of you.

The feeling was indescribable. You were the tiniest jump away from taking flight into the night sky. It was exhilarating and terrifying all at once.

One wrong move at this speed and you’d be dead. You knew that. But Mark drove with unmatched skill, drifting around turns with expert precision. He was letting you flirt with danger, dangling you over the fire, but never letting you get burned.

The roads were mostly empty at this late hour, but Mark deftly weaved around cars on the highway. You found yourself relaxing, leaning into the movements of his car like you were a part of it. On more than one occasion, you cried out at a sharp turn like you were on the greatest rollercoaster of your life, making Mark smile.

He crossed the finish line ahead of the rest, and rather than stick around and celebrate, he kept going, driving and driving. His car sped over a bridge, along the water and finally - after what felt like hours - returned to the lot.

Mark jerked the parking brake, which made a loud pop, and looked over at you with a snicker of pure mischief. “Better than sex, isn’t it?”

You blew out a breath. “Wow.” Then, you faced him and said, “Do it again.”

Mark smirked, shifting gears. “Virgin to whore in zero to sixty.”

You bit your lip as warmth flared behind your cheeks.

Maybe Busan wasn’t so bad, after all.

“Well?” Chungha asked with a wry smile.

You briefly looked over your shoulder, hoping it was Mark’s eyes you felt on your backside, and sure enough, there he was leaning against his car and watching you walk away with his teeth sinking into his bottom lip.

Chungha saw where your attention had gone and giggled.

“Apparently, I’m an adrenaline junkie,” you joked, running a hand through your hair. You felt exhausted and disheveled, but in the best of ways. Like you’d had mad, filthy sex for an hour and were still riding on the heels of your high.

All without even being touched.

Chungha draped an arm around your shoulders and gushed, “It’s amazing, right? The noise, the vibration, and the sexy guy with his hand on the wheel.”

You tucked your head bashfully. “Yeah, he’s… a very good driver,” you mumbled.

“Among other things.”

You let her take you home, wishing you could have stayed all night.

Curled up in bed, you dreamt of fast cars and cities reduced to blurs of colors. And maybe Mark. He may have appeared for a second or two, but you quickly forbade yourself from thinking about him for too long.

It’s not that you disliked Mark. Quite the contrary. You were undeniably hot for him. It was hard not to be. With that goddamn smile and big, sparkly eyes. You couldn’t remember the last time you wanted to kiss someone this badly.

If ever.

But you’d had time to think and everything about Mark Lee screamed fuckboy. Given the state of your heart, you weren’t in the mood to have it broken by a guy anytime soon.

And yet, you found yourself crossing your fingers in the hopes that he would take you for a spin again, driving at such a speed you could escape your problems for a moment.

You slept well into the afternoon, woken only by your phone ringing loudly on the nightstand. In your excitement, you’d forgotten to put it on Do Not Disturb. Annoyed, you rasped, “Who the hell is this?”

“Hey, what are you doing tonight?” Chungha chirped, taking your mood in stride.

You sat up, but refused to crawl out from beneath the warm blankets. “Sulking and contemplating my own existence.”

“You’re still mad about moving? Come on. It’s not that bad here.”

“A hot guy and a fast car don’t make up for all the things I left behind, Chungha.”

Chungha paused, gathering her words, and continued, “You’re right, but you can make some friends here if you would just give them a chance.”

You pursed your lips and thought about arguing, but you didn’t want to. You wanted to see Mark again. “What do you have in mind?”

“There’s another hangout tonight. Whoever lost the race last night has to buy all the booze.”

“Poor guy,” you droned, sarcastic. “What time?”

For the first time in your life, you counted down the hours until the sun began to set. Never before had you actively wished the day away. Once the daylight hours ran out, you dolled yourself up. Not in an obvious “I wanna get laid” kind of way, but pretty damn close.

Jaemin swung by and picked you up, and Chungha couldn’t pass the opportunity to tease you. “Well, well, well. Look who’s smiling.”

“Shut up,” you whined, insincere.

She wasn’t wrong. You were beaming.

Instead of the abandoned lot from before, Saturdays were conducted by the sea. There was a nook off a long, narrow road, turning from a stretch of gravel to smooth pavement lightly dusted with sand.

“How about that view, huh?” Chungha said, hopping out of the car.

“It’s beautiful,” you whispered, wide eyes taking in the horizon where the waves churned.

Since arriving in Busan, you felt like you could breathe for the first time. You were no longer suffocating between buildings and people, but in a broad, open space, inhaling the crisp, salty air of the ocean.

Kinda similar to how you felt in Mark’s car the night before, but you didn’t need to dwell on that.

Chungha led you over, holding your hand after sensing your hesitation. This crowd wasn’t like the night before. It was much thinner, consisting of only the drivers. You recognized most of the boys, a few of them with girls tucked close.

Obviously the ones in a relationship. Or maybe they were potential hookups. You couldn't be sure. A few were flying solo, but they didn’t seem to mind.

Rather than chaos building toward a race, this was casual and relaxed.

Chungha announced your name to the group in case they’d missed it and everyone either greeted you or gave you a polite little wave. You thanked them and waved back, but your eyes were scanning the group.

Mark wasn’t there. Much to your disappointment.

Chungha giggled as she sat squarely on Jaemin’s lap, knowing exactly why you suddenly looked miffed, but didn’t say a word about it. Your secret was safe with her.

Pushing back on thoughts of Mark, which you had plenty of practice with for the past couple of hours, you took an empty seat beside Haechan, who introduced himself to you sweetly.

Cars formed a circle around the little gathering and Haechan pointed at the lusciously violet car behind him. “She’s mine,” he said proudly.

“The color is insane,” you exclaimed. “Is she fast?”

“Like lightning.”

“Did you race last night?”

Haechan bobbed his head. “Yep. I got stuck in the middle. Finished in third though.”

“That’s not bad,” you said with a smile.

“Not as good as first, obviously,” Haechan joked, mischievous. “Which you scored on your very first ride along.”

You flushed and lowered your head, biting your lip. And you couldn’t help but ask, “Yeah, speaking of… that, where is Mark?”

“He’s running late. He works a lot.”

Hope rose in your chest. “Ah.”

Haechan sized you up then, the corner of his mouth lifting. He put the beer to his lips and downed a mouthful, and decided then and there he would not be pursuing you. Not when you had those Mark Lee stars in your eyes already.

Jeno meandered over, not so subtly, and cozied up beside you. He asked how you were liking Busan, tucked some of your hair behind your ear, and followed up with, “You wanna come with me for a quick spin, baby?”

You looked into his handsome face and arched a brow. “Quick, huh?”

Pretending to wince, Jeno flirted, “I could spare a couple minutes on foreplay.”

“And they say chivalry is dead,” you smarted, getting to your feet in search of a drink.

Jeno grabbed your hand, stopping you, and you turned back toward him. The impatience was evident on your face. “Please,” Jeno whined, peering up at you with sad eyes. “My doctor told me I only have a few days left to live.”

You squeezed his hand, stuck out your lip, and said, “I’m not getting your dick wet. I guess you’ll just have to die.”

Haechan laughed as you walked off, earning a playful shove from Jeno and almost toppling out of his chair.

Chungha, the angel that she was, had already given you the rundown on the boys on the way over. Jeno was very accustomed to girls throwing themselves at him, because in addition to being sexy as hell, he was also packing. What he lacked in charm, he allegedly made up for in dick.

Jaemin, of course, was in a committed, happy relationship. Chungha gushed to you how well he treated her, and how much she doted on him. They were talking about marriage and kids and the whole boring suburban life together while you rode in the backseat.

It was really damn cute.

Renjun was kinda mean, but taken. Yangyang was in a friends with benefits situation. Chenle and Jisung were more concerned with beating each other in races than hooking up with girls. Their need for competition currently outweighed their desire to chase pussy. Shotaro was new from Japan and had a huge crush on a girl, but was too scared to make a move yet.

Though given the way she was leaning against him and smiling, it was safe to say the feelings were mutual.

Which left Mark and Haechan. Aside from blood, they were brothers. Partners in crime. If you ever wanted to date Mark, you would be dating Haechan too. And vice versa.

Not that you would ever want to date Mark. Pfft. The idea hadn’t crossed your mind.

After reaching into the cooler to grab a beer, you found yourself putting it back. And for the most obnoxious reason. You didn’t want beer breath.

Why the fuck were you thinking about kissing someone? And not just anyone. You wanted to kiss Mark. Who wasn’t even fucking there.

Get a grip, you chastised yourself, returning to Haechan when you noticed Jeno had migrated back over to Jaemin. Much to Chungha’s annoyance, as she had been nibbling on her boyfriend’s neck and he still hadn’t gotten the hint.

“You don’t want a drink?” Haechan asked curiously.

You shook your head and sat next to him, the wind coursing into your hair.

As it turned out, Haechan was allergic to silence and he started asking questions, showing a genuine interest in you. And you found yourself answering him without any hesitation or pretense.

You talked about college, about the move, about your life back home. Although you said nothing of your mother, of course. You told him about your friends and your hobbies. Haechan volunteered very little information about himself. It almost felt like he was interviewing you.

For what, you had no idea.

The sound of a revving engine drew everyone’s attention and your heart skipped a beat when you recognized Mark’s black car joining the circle. An empty space had been left for him. Which was very sweet in its own way.

Mark leapt out and greeted his friends, apologizing for how late work had kept him.

You were the only one that stayed put, watching and waiting, gripping the edges of your seat and dangling your legs back and forth.

Mark finally - fucking finally - acknowledged your presence, pretending to be shocked to see you and said, “Hey, new girl.”

You pouted. “I have a name, you know.”

“You’re right. I’m sorry,” Mark replied, putting a hand over his heart and then addressing you by name.

“Better,” you retorted, smiling.

Haechan slouched back into his seat beside you, sipped his beer, and said, “Mark, your new friend here is a college graduate.”

“Really?”

You glanced over at Haechan, bemused.

“Yeah. She’s even planning on going to grad school.”

Mark bobbed his head. “Impressive.”

“Okay, this isn’t weird at all,” you mumbled, giving Haechan a look. “Is that some inside joke I’m not in on?”

“Yes,” he said.

Well, at least he was honest. Couldn’t fault him for that. You shrugged. “Alright then.”

Mark chuckled.

Time soon lost all meaning. Mark, regardless of how brusque and arrogant he was behind the wheel, was a total sweetheart outside of his car. He didn’t make any moves on you, which was a little frustrating, but he seemed eager to hear where your head was at over the move to Busan and particularly wanted to know how long you would be staying.

You didn’t know. Your father was very vocal about how much he liked it, which meant he could request to stay indefinitely. And probably would so he could stay in denial about your mother having ever existed. But that was a conversation to be unpacked another day. Or never. You, on the other hand, were longing to go back home, hoping and praying this was only a temporary stint. A mere blip on the radar of your life.

That was partly why you were drawn to Mark. Him being handsome and funny and charming had nothing to do with it. Okay, maybe not all to do with it. But you were attracted to the fact that anything that went down between you and Mark would be left behind in Busan when you went home.

He would be a passing daydream.

Eventually, Mark decided he’d heard enough. You were definitely into him and he was vibing with you. So he was rather confident when he asked, “Can I take you somewhere?”

I thought you’d never ask. “Sure,” you replied, screaming internally.

Mark held out his hand and you took it. You told Chungha you were leaving and off the two of you went in Mark’s black car.

He drove like a normal person. Again, much to your disappointment. He didn’t speed or drift. His car cruised along the road, parking at a spot overlooking the water.

Mark unbuckled his seatbelt. “Sorry for taking you away from everyone,” he apologized, but there was something playful in his tone. “I wanted you to myself.”

“I’m glad,” you said quietly, leaning toward him. Your heart started to pick up speed. “It’s much warmer in here.”

Mark came closer, the console between your seats the only thing in his way, and whispered, “I’ve been dying to kiss you.”

“Kiss me then.”

Mark cradled your head in his hand, slipping his fingers into your hair, and pulled you the rest of the way toward him, meeting his lips to yours.

You should have known he was a good kisser, but this was something else. He started soft and slow, and you matched his energy, panting for more until Mark tightened his grip on your hair and flicked his tongue into your mouth.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” Mark broke from the kiss to ask.

By now, you had pulled him halfway into your seat and regardless of how uncomfortable it was with that console digging into his stomach, Mark didn’t utter a single complaint. “Nothing,” you said, impatient. “Why? What do you have in mind?”

Mark held onto your waist and drew you close, kissing you with abandon. Then, he remembered his train of thought, which had come to a grinding halt at the heat of your kisses and the warmth of your body against his. “Come out with me. I’ll show you some good places.”

Honestly, the only good place you wanted to see was him without any of his clothes on, but you needed to pace yourself. “Okay. What time?”

“How does noon sound?”

“Perfect.”

Mark tore himself away from you with a groan, tipping his head back and taking a breath. “We need to stop,” he rasped, but tugged you toward him until his lips brushed yours again. He was weighing how bad it would be if he just made out with you for the foreseeable future.

You nipped at his lips and played coy. “What for?”

“Before we keep going.”

You stopped, both surprised and maybe a little impressed that he didn’t want to go further with you already. Perhaps he was worth more of your time and attention. You could draw this out; make it fun. You smirked at him, your eyes falling to his swollen lips, evidence of your thirst for trouble.

“Take me home, Mark,” you said, leaving a parting kiss on the corner of his mouth.

Mark smiled.

You pulled up your address on his phone and Mark drove to your house, coming to a stop at the foot of your driveway. His hand rested possessively on your thigh, as it had since you left that spot overlooking the sea.

You unfastened your seatbelt and started to get out, but Mark grabbed your hand and asked, his voice low and soft, “Can I have one more kiss?”

Of course, he could. You gave him two for good measure.

Mark watched you walk up the driveway and shoot one more lusty look his way before going inside. Not until you were safe and sound did he leave. Which you noticed, peeking out the window as his car roared away.

He earned himself even more points with that.

Your name ringing out in the hallway made you gasp and whip around. “Jeez, Dad. You almost gave me a heart attack,” you exclaimed in surprise.

Your father’s shoulders were drooping. His eyes were bloodshot. He was clearly exhausted, but never lost his humor. “I just want to say that I know you’re a grown woman and make your own decisions,” he began, making you quirk a brow. “You’ve always been very responsible, but please… I am not ready to be a grandfather.”

You burst into laughter, having been worried he was actually going to chide you. Though it was no secret he’d been letting you get away with a lot more since your mother’s passing. You guessed he thought it compensated for his emotional absence in her wake.

Marching up to your dad, you rose to your tiptoes and hugged him, saying, “Don’t worry, Pop. I’m the only fussy baby allowed around here.”

He kissed your temple. “Goodnight. Sweet dreams.”

Very, very sweet, you thought mischievously.

The next day, Mark parked his car outside your house two minutes before noon. He certainly earned more points for punctuality and the fuckboy designation was shedding away.

The broadest grin spread across Mark’s lips as he watched you rush out of the house and into his car, flirting, “Hey, pretty girl.”

You leaned in, stealing a kiss before fastening your seatbelt.

It was nightfall when you returned home; the entire Sunday spent with Mark. And the next Sunday after that. And the one after that, too.

Everyone came to accept you as part of the group, greeting you like a part of the gang on Saturday night hangouts. You were Mark’s passenger for every race, rewarding him with a kiss when he crossed the finish line. With tongue.

Jeno made a few more persistent attempts to steal you away, but with the way Mark didn’t care and sometimes laughed at his friend’s expense, you assumed it was a running joke and everyone enjoyed seeing Jeno make a fool of himself. So you played along.

Oddly enough, Jisung even tried to shoot his shot with you, but you were all eyes for Mark.

And his eyes were always on you.

The weeks were misery, because Mark worked as hard as he played and he didn’t have a free moment to spare for you. But you did stay up through the night on the phone with him more often than not. At some point, you would fall asleep, no matter how hard you fought it.

You liked getting to know him and it seemed he liked getting to know you too.

Mark let slip that he was pulling extra shifts during the week to give himself more free time - with you - on the weekends, and that made something somersault in your chest. Maybe your heart. Not that you’d interacted much with her over the past few years.

You were beginning to wonder if she was still there, but thanks to Mark, she was waking up.

Mark intentionally bumped into you as you walked alongside him, the two of you eating ice cream. You giggled and nudged him back with your hip, getting a chunk of brownie on your spoon to feed him. Sitting at one of the tables outside, you ate in comfortable silence, occasionally stealing glances at the water in the distance. It was a strangely warm day for winter, causing fog to cover the shore like cotton.

You smirked at Mark as you let the red spoon linger in your mouth, because he was playing footsie with you under the table, rubbing his ankle up your bare calf. You spryly slipped out of your shoe and pinched him with your toes, making Mark yelp in surprise.

“You’re cute,” Mark murmured, propping his head on his hand and staring at you with big, twinkly eyes.

You cocked your head, sinking your teeth into your lip. His leg moved between your knees now. “Can I help you find something?” you asked sheepishly. The short pleated skirt was definitely a good choice. You hoped it would be too tempting for him to ignore.

Mark took your hand and played with your fingers while he rubbed his knee against your inner thigh and said, “I can find it just fine.”

You smirked, about to say something snarky, when an unfamiliar voice called, “Lee Minhyung!”

Mark startled, his eyes filling with fear, and he pulled away from you, getting to his feet as someone approached. “Yeonjun,” he huffed under his breath. “What do you want?”

“Is that how you greet an old friend?” Yeonjun jeered. He was flanked by two other guys, both of them sporting wolfish grins. The trio looked like they were up to no good.

“I’m kinda busy right now,” Mark said, sidestepping until he stood in front of you, shielding you from view. “Let’s do this later.”

The protective gesture was not lost on you. The hairs on your neck stood straight up.

Yeonjun leaned over, peeking around Mark as belligerently as possible, and waved at you. “Hello, beautiful. Friend of Mark’s?”

Everything about this boy rubbed you the wrong way, especially with how Mark was reacting to him. So you chose to pinch your lips together and say nothing. Though giving him a raised middle finger was at the top of the list of possibilities.

“How did you land such a fine fucking female, Minhyung-ie?”

Mark bristled and set his jaw, hissing, “Don’t talk to her.”

Yeonjun dropped his smile, his lips frowning with contempt. He jabbed his finger into Mark’s chest and snapped, “Who the hell do you think you’re talking to?”

Mark held his ground, but didn’t fight back, taking every shove to his chest Yeonjun gave him. And that downright infuriated you.

You don’t know what came over you, but you leapt up, braced both hands on Yeonjun’s chest and pushed him back, cursing, “Fuck off. Leave him alone.”

Yeonjun gawked in surprise before grinning with delight. “Mark, put a leash on your pussy cat,” he said, amused.

Mark already had his arms around you, steering you behind him, but you wouldn’t back down and taunted, “Come on, tough guy. You wanted a scene - I’ll fucking give you one.”

Yeonjun laughed. By the look in his eyes, he wanted to eat you up for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

“Let’s go,” Mark insisted before the situation devolved further, taking your hand in his and hauling you away with him.

Yeonjun didn’t give chase and as you scowled at him over your shoulder, he waved goodbye and called out, “That one’s gonna cost you extra, Minhyung!”

Your brows stitched, but you let Mark drag you away. His pace was fast, hurried, like he couldn’t escape them fast enough.

Once in the clear, Mark steered you behind a tree, backed you against it and scolded, “Are you fucking insane?”

You folded your arms in defiance. “Call me crazy, but where I come from, we stick up for each other.”

“No one has ever stuck up for me like that before,” Mark said softly, as if it had just dawned on him. You were brave. And reckless as hell, but Mark liked it.

“Would you have let them?”

“No. My business is mine. Don’t put yourself in danger like that for me again.”

You rolled your eyes, assuming that was for the sake of his pride. “Mark, you don’t tell me what to do.”

“Please,” he said, putting his hands together. “Please, don’t do that again. I’m asking. Not demanding.”

You narrowed your gaze on Mark, studying him. “They’re dangerous, huh?”

Mark bobbed his head. “More than a little.”

“What do they have on you?”

Part of you expected him to deflect or even lie, but Mark caught you off guard when he answered honestly, “My family owes his family money.”

“So, the son pays for the sins of the father?”

“Something like that.”

You pursed your lips, tensing with frustration at the injustice of it all. That’s why Mark worked so hard. He was paying off debts. Debts that weren’t even his fault or his responsibility. “That’s… bullshit,” you said angrily.

“Yeah, I know,” Mark replied, lowering his head. He carried shame too. Shame that was never his to begin with either. It was passed on, like the rest of his troubles.

You felt bad for getting snippy with him and reached forward to cradle his face in your hands, making him look at you. With a sigh, you asked, “Is there any way I can help you?”

Mark melted on the spot, closing the distance until he was flush against you. “No, but I appreciate the offer and I respect you trying to protect me.”

“You’re my friend,” you crooned, stroking a thumb over his cheek. God, you could get lost in those eyes of his for hours. “I protect my friends.”

Mark let his tongue linger in the corner of his mouth and tilted his head, asking, “Just a friend?”

“A friend that I make out with occasionally?”

“I’ll take it,” Mark said, sealing his lips to yours the moment the words left him.

You kissed him back, draping your arms around his shoulders and leaning back against the tree, taking him with you. You kissed him till you both were dazed, humming when his hands kneaded your waist.

Mark broke from the kiss thanks to a familiar growing hardness in his pants, but played it off well, pressing a chaste kiss to your nose and earning a little giggle.

You teased some of your fingers into his dark hair, still clinging to him tightly, and said, “You know, if you want to be more than friends, all you have to do is ask.”

Mark made a face and whined, “Well, I was planning on it, but I can’t now.”

You gawked. “What - why not?”

“Because you just said that. Now you’ll think it was your idea.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

Mark trapped you back to him when you started to move away, nipping at your lips, and whispered, “Will you be my girlfriend?”

Your heart rocketed into your throat before doing cartwheels of celebration in your chest. “Ask me tomorrow when I’ve forgotten that I put you up to it,” you joked, but you were ready to say yes a thousand times.

Not letting you escape, Mark tightened his arms around your waist, his breath warm on your cheek. “Be my girlfriend.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive.”

“I’m a handful.”

Mark slipped a hand down your back and squeezed your ass, retorting, “I know that.”

“I swear a lot.”

“I like that about you.”

Well, you were officially out of arguments. And you were smiling so hard your cheeks began to ache. “Okay. I’ll be your girlfriend.”

Mark was beaming, crashing his lips on yours again for another heart-stopping kiss.

He brought you home not long after, telling you he had some work to take care of. You assumed it had to do with Yeonjun, but you were on such a high from his kisses and him asking you out that you didn’t pry.

As you clambered out of the car, Mark grabbed your hand and asked, “Hey, what are you doing tonight?”

“I’m free,” you replied quickly. He should have known by now you would clear your schedule for him at any given moment. “What do you have in mind?”

“You like lobster?”

“Who doesn’t like lobster?”

Mark chuckled, bringing your hand to his lips to leave a kiss on your knuckles and said, “I’ll pick you up at seven.”

You winked at him. “I’ll be ready.”

And you were. Dressed in your favorite blue dress with a denim jacket, you jogged to the front door and yelled, “Gotta go, Dad. Love you. Bye!”

“Just a second, dear.”

Much to your chagrin, you slowly turned around, cursing under your breath. “So close.”

Your dad took off his glasses and said with a tone that left no room for argument, “Have him come in.”

You devolved into a panic rather quickly, because you were your father’s only daughter so naturally he took great pleasure in trying to scare boys away from you. “Dad, please. I’m begging you. He’s a good guy.”

Your father held up his hands in surrender and said, “I’ll be an angel. I promise.”

You cut your eyes at him, but you trusted he was willing to play nice for the time being. Taking out your phone to text Mark, you jolted when the doorbell rang. Pleasantly surprised, you opened the door, flashing a big smile at the sight of your boyfriend. “Hi, Mark.”

Mark was looking a little too good in his leather jacket and ripped jeans. “Hey, beautiful,” he purred, leaning in and kissing your cheek. “You ready to go?”

“Um, my dad kinda wants to meet you,” you told him hurriedly as your father’s footsteps approached, mouthing, “I’m sorry.”

“So, you’re the boy driving my daughter all over the country?”

Crimson flushed Mark’s cheeks and it was the most adorable thing you’d ever seen. “Yes, sir,” he said politely, holding out his hand. “I’m Mark. Mark Lee.”

Your father shook his hand firmly. “Alright, Mark. Anything happens to my daughter and you’ll be giving up the driver seat of your car for the trunk of my car. Am I clear?”

“Crystal clear, sir,” Mark replied, head held high. “I will protect her with my life.”

“Good.”

Your father stood on the porch and waved goodbye as Mark drove away. You waved back before rolling up the window.

“I’m sorry about that. My dad is overly protective.”

“Don’t be,” Mark interjected, holding your hand over the console between your bodies, lacing his fingers through yours. “If I had a daughter, I would be the same way.”

That made heat rush through your body.

Mark glanced over at you as he drove and murmured, “You look really nice tonight.”

“Thanks, boyfriend,” you said cutely.

He snickered, turning his eyes back to the road.

The fancy restaurant was bursting at the seams. It was Sunday night, after all. You smiled when Mark walked in with you on his arm and told them he had a reservation. The two of you cozied up in a booth by the windows, the buzz of red wine setting in, and you were far more hungry for each other than the food.

“What are your plans?” Mark asked curiously.

“Plans for what?” You spun some pasta on your fork and blew on it before taking a bite.

“Grad school.”

“I don’t know,” you said with a shrug, fighting a frown. “My life is on pause while my dad is here. I figure I’ll start grad school when we go back home.”

Mark pursed his lips a little, but quickly forced a smile. “And what if you stayed here?”

You winced, like the notion repulsed you. “That would be the worst,” you groaned. Realizing how rude you sounded, you changed your tone and said, “I mean, this is like an extended vacation. Eventually, I will have to go home.”

“We should make the most of your time here then,” Mark whispered under his breath, putting the glass of wine to his lips.

You smiled knowingly. “Yes, we should.”

When you left the restaurant, Mark asked if he could take you somewhere. Just like he had that first night at the beach. Your heart danced in your chest. You knew what was coming next. In your experience, a month of kissing and touching could only culminate in one thing.

Frankly, you were shocked the two of you lasted this long.

Mark rolled his car into a garage next to a junkyard. The walls looked ready to crumble at any second, barely hanging on. The yellow lights flickered occasionally, giving off a warm hue.

Your high heels clicked on the concrete floor when you stepped out. “Wow,” was all you could say.

The garage housed four cars, each a different color and build. And each was in a different stage of progress. One was only a steel frame. But the one that snared your attention was a mint green Buick that definitely hadn’t made it out of the sixties.

You were tempted to ask Mark how in the hell he got his hands on a beauty like this. But then you realized, looking at the frame a few feet away, that maybe Mark was way more talented than he let on. You smoothed a hand over the hood and said in disbelief, “Did you make this?”

“I’m restoring it,” Mark clarified, blushing a little with pride. “I like old cars.”

“This is amazing.” And it was. You couldn’t imagine how much blood, sweat and tears went into restoring these old cars to their former glory. You imagined a shirtless Mark, glistening under the lights, hands covered in grease, and the mental image made you hot.

Mark pressed a button on the wall with the heel of his hand and the garage door began to close, creaking loudly. He watched you brace your hands on the open window, peering inside the Buick, even reaching in to run your fingers over the wheel.

You smiled when he came up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing beneath your ear. You ran your hand up his forearm and stood upright, reaching back to thread your fingers into his hair as he pressed kiss after kiss down your throat.

Mark’s breath was hot on your skin as he whispered, “Ever done it in a car before?”

You snickered darkly and told him, “Yes. I’m very familiar with backseat sex on the side of the road. I was young and stupid once. Or twice.”

Damn. Why were you getting nervous? Why was your voice trembling?

Mark heard it too and he chuckled like the devil himself. “Mm.”

You tightened your grip on his hair and let your eyes flutter closed. He sucked a bruise intently where your neck met your shoulder, his hands roaming over your body, paying extra attention to your breasts.

She’s so beautiful, Mark thought to himself, too busy marking you to verbalize it. He couldn’t remember being so attracted to someone, so hellbent on having them. The moment you shoved Yeonjun away from him, Mark wanted to plow the shit out of you. But the majority of him was a gentleman and so he stifled those feelings down.

Which was getting increasingly harder to do. Mark wanted you so bad he couldn’t stand it. The little soft sounds spilling from your lips as he touched you shot straight to his cock. He winched his eyes closed and tried not to imagine bending you over the car and fucking you from behind.

When Mark broke from your neck with a wet pop, you turned around in his arms, looking into his eyes and wanting to crumble at how clouded with lust they’d become. “I’ve never done it… on a car before.”

Mark smirked, wondering if you could read his mind. He stole a quick kiss and whispered, “Wanna change that?”

You nodded and giggled when he smashed his lips on yours again. Very eagerly this time. Mark moved toward you, steering you to the car until you bumped back against it, slipping his tongue into your mouth to catch your gasp of surprise.

Mark could feel his heart racing, thundering like the powerful engine of his car. Something about you was just so goddamn intoxicating. Maybe it was that mouth of yours. How good you kissed him. Or how badly you made him laugh.

Excitement tickled up your spine when Mark slipped his hands beneath your dress and grabbed you by the hips, lifting you up and setting you down on the hood of the car. You would have questioned it. You would have expressed some concern over being sat unceremoniously on the glossy old Buick, but Mark’s kisses settled any doubts.

He most definitely wanted you on top of that car.

You hooked your legs behind his hips and used your toes to kick off your shoes carefully, because you’d be damned if you got a scratch on the perfectly painted surface. Then, you grabbed his jacket, guiding it off until it landed in a pile on the floor, dragging your fingers over his chest and shoulders, feeling the taut muscles underneath.

Mark broke from your lips to kiss and suckle on your neck, getting himself a little moan as reward. He palmed at your thighs, pushing your dress higher and higher until his hands found your lace thong.

You were hoping for some action tonight and dressed accordingly.

A tiny cry of surprise left you when Mark roughly shimmied your hips in the air, stripping you out of your underwear and dragging them down your legs before tucking them into the back pocket of his jeans like a souvenir.

You rocked back on your elbows, licking your lips when Mark’s eyes met yours, and crawled backwards, closer to the windshield. Mark pursued, clambering onto the hood and gathering your hips in his hands, tonguing his way down your inner thigh.

These sixties cars had such long front cabs. Who knew that would come in handy.

Mark ate you out like a man starved, bringing you to ecstasy on his tongue with his head buried between your thighs.

You couldn’t catch your breath, shaking on top of that car like you’d lost all control of your body. Your mind wasn’t far behind either. You undulated beneath Mark, your fists in his hair, borderline ripping the strands at the root. He kept sucking on your bundle of nerves, hypersensitive with orgasm.

“Give me one more,” Mark broke from your pussy long enough to growl, biting the inside of your thigh before going back in. You were shaking in his hands, totally at his mercy, curling away from his mouth because he was going to unravel you. And he loved every second of it.

“Mark, fuck, fuck, fuck,” you chanted, toes curling behind his back, thighs clamping on his head. Nothing slowed him down. You arched on the hood, your head colliding with the windshield, but that did nothing to distract you from the pounding in your ears.

It was your pulse racing uncontrollably. Your heart on the verge of combusting, leaving you in nothing but pieces.

You squirmed, but his grip on you was brutal. There was no escape. You turned on your side, hips bucking into his mouth as he flicked his tongue over your clit faster and faster. Mark growled when you snagged at his hair again, which only turned you on more.

The heat in your belly grew and grew. You could feel yourself gushing into his mouth and he lapped it all up hungrily. Fighting like hell against orgasm, you were no match for Mark and the high rushed through you again as you came, making you moan at the top of your lungs.

Mark knew then and there that he had you. But he was conflicted. He’d been out to suck the soul out of you, that much was obvious, but he couldn’t decide what his motivation was. At first, it was all part of seducing you.

On the one hand, he’d been wanting to fuck you since that first night and he’d had an ulterior motive for getting you into his backseat too. But with every minute spent with you, Mark came to accept that he liked you.

Maybe with time, he could even love you.

And then you made those comments at the restaurant. About how this was but a short stop in the grand scheme of your life and you were counting down the days until it was over. You made no mention of Mark and your newfound relationship with him. He was just a tiny part of this passing daydream.

You didn’t care about him at all.

So, Mark decided to have his fun. If you only wanted someone to kiss and fuck, he would gladly be that for you. All his feelings be damned. Mark wouldn’t be caught dead loving someone that had no intention of loving him back.

He may have been a fool for pussy, but he was not a fool with his heart.

Your body went limp, the last few aftershocks of climax making your legs tremble. Mark propped himself up over you and wiped his mouth, glistening with your pleasure, and purred, “I love the way you taste.”

You were still panting and panting, your chest rising and falling. Your dress had bunched up to your ribs. You finally willed yourself to lift your head and look at him. And you immediately let your head fall back again. “Fuck.”

Mark’s lips were toying with a grin. He was quite pleased with himself, hopping off the car. There was a very obvious bulge in his jeans, painfully hard, and he was hoping you would help with that. Running his hand on the edge of the hood affectionately, he said, “This was not the best idea I ever had.”

That fully brought you back to your senses. You sat up, tugging your dress down, and asked worriedly, “What? Why?”

“Because every time I look at this damn car now, I’m gonna get hard.”

You covered your mouth, hiding your laugh.

Mark reached over, getting you in his arms and setting you down. The concrete was cold on your bare feet, but you didn’t care. You instantly folded into his embrace, welcoming his kisses that shifted from sweet to hot.

“Mark,” you sighed, clinging to him for dear life. Mark had you pinned against the car, stealing the air out of your lungs, touching every inch of you his hands could reach. You could feel the bulge in his jeans and you reached down to palm it, earning yourself a needy groan.

“Wanna come inside?”

You bit your lip and nodded.

“Do you wanna…,” Mark trailed, forcing himself to stop kissing you for a goddamn second to look into your eyes. “Fool around?”

“Yes,” you said without hesitation.

Mark took you by the hand and led you into the house attached to the garage. You didn’t notice anything about it, because you were too busy sucking on Mark’s tongue in your mouth. You stumbled with him across a tiny kitchen and into a narrow hallway, bumping into walls together before being steered into a bedroom and falling onto a squeaky mattress with him on top of you.

To say you returned the favor would be an understatement. Mark released down your throat with the most delicious groan you’d ever heard, his hand tangled in your hair, and you sucked him clean. Your dress was on the floor along with his clothes, both of you naked and sweating and panting, peeking your heads out from under the blanket to catch your breath before slipping back under again.

While Mark stroked two fingers into your wet pussy, you pumped his cock in your fist to get him stiff again. Which took no time at all. He was hot and hard and ready for you just as you spilled over the edge once more, crying out Mark’s name as you clenched on his fingers.

Mark talked and coaxed you through it. “Mm, that’s a good girl,” he rasped, nibbling on your collarbone, making you see stars at the height of your pleasure. “You’re so fucking pretty when you come.”

Jesus fucking Christ. Was he trying to ruin you?

You whimpered when he rolled you onto your stomach, dragging his tongue over your shoulders and crowding your back, jerking his cock as he made room for himself between your thighs. You came back to your senses then and turned, bracing a hand on his abs to stop him.

Mark looked at you, puzzled, smoothing his palm down your side. “What’s wrong, baby?”

“I… I’m not ready to do sex with you yet,” you told him nervously, still trembling. “Is that okay?”

It was kind of a surprise to you. You’d been ready and eager to fuck him, but now, you didn’t want to give it up just yet. You liked Mark a little too much. You needed to see if he thought of you as worth waiting for.

Mark flipped you over onto your back again, kissing your chest, right over your thundering heart. “Of course, it’s okay,” he said with a reassuring smile.

You breathed out in relief. Lifting your head, you closed your eyes and kissed him hotly. And the two of you faded into the night.

In the morning, you woke up with Mark’s arm around your naked waist, spooning you from behind like you were his favorite pillow. He was also snoring a bit, which almost made you laugh, because he’d exhausted your body so much you’d slept right through it. You turned around carefully in his hold, nuzzling his cheek and burying your face beneath his chin. Mark instinctively molded against you, holding you to his chest.

Wow, was all you could think. Despite not going all the way, you would remember this night for as long as you lived. You kissed for what felt like hours. You touched and pleasured each other. Frankly, you lost count of how many times he made you come. Mark finished so hard when you worked him between your tits that he apologized a thousand times for the mess he made on your chest.

Between rounds, you talked and laughed and cuddled. Mark hugged you to him so tight you almost couldn’t breathe, crushed between his arms, but to you, it was never tight enough. You wanted him to devour you whole, leaving behind only the good parts of you, destroying the bad.

It was everything. Everything you never knew you were missing.

Clinging to Mark, you stared at his perfect profile, tracing senseless patterns on his chest with your fingertips. He looked even more adorable while sleeping and that did nothing but fluster you more.

Would staying here with him really be so bad?

You frowned. That was too forbidden a thought. Mark was only a fling. You wouldn’t be here much longer. The dynamic between you and him wouldn’t even be this hot if not for the fact you would be leaving eventually, no strings attached. Like it meant nothing.

Right?

It was Sunday morning. Mark had nowhere to be and neither did you. He probably expected you to spend the day with him as you had every Sunday since you met. You mulled it over and decided it would be better to leave for now.

You’d had your fair share of intimacy with someone you were determined not to fall for.

In the daylight, you got your first glimpse of Mark’s little house. He clearly lived alone and with very limited means. But in a total contrast with your new house and all its cold emptiness, Mark’s place was warm and clearly lived in.

As you meandered through his living room, looking at the photos on the walls, covered in a layer of dust, you wondered what it would be like to be added among them. You could see yourself happy in his place. Honestly, being with Mark, you didn’t notice your surroundings much.

And his bed was more than comfortable. The bed you had just left.

That’s when you felt like you were intruding in his safe space and decided not to linger. Slipping into the garage to retrieve your shoes, you smoothed your hand over the green Buick’s hood and whispered, “Thank you for your service.”

When Mark woke up, he looked around for you and found a note left on his nightstand, which read, You look extra cute when sleeping. You also snore. Which is kinda cute too. I called a cab to take me home. I need a shower. Badly. Totally your fault but I won’t hold it against you.

Mark snorted, lingering his eyes on the note. You had drawn a winking face in the corner and signed it with your name. Mark wondered why it felt so formal, like you were thanking him for the orgasms and then heading back to your life.

As if he’d served his purpose.

It felt dismissive and borderline cold. Even though you’d made a point to call him cute. That didn’t matter. Mark could tell you were just as conflicted about where this relationship was heading as he was.

Running a hand through his hair and then running it down his face, Mark roused out of bed and dragged his feet into the bathroom for a long, hot shower.

Across town, you were in the shower too. Although part of you really didn’t want to scrub the scent of Mark from your skin, it was necessary in the process of washing away your feelings.

Wrapped in a towel, your hair dripping wet, you couldn’t resist checking your phone. And imagine your surprise when you saw that you had no new texts from Mark.

Disappointment creased your face. At the very least you expected a funny “thanks for the blow jobs” text or something. Considering how hard he’d moaned and come all over you, you’d given him a top tier nut or two.

Tossing the phone onto your nightstand, you dropped down on the edge of the bed and tried not to let it bother you, but catching one of the birds outside your window with your bare hands would have been easier.

Did you really have any room to complain though? Nope. You were the one that bolted out of his bed before he woke up like a thief in the night.

Whatever, you thought bitterly. Mark was yours for a moment and that moment had seemingly passed.

He didn’t call or text that week. At night, when you curled up to sleep, you thought back to all those hours spent on the phone with him, getting to know him. Falling asleep with his dreamy voice in your ear. You didn’t want to admit you missed Mark. You missed him desperately. It was pathetic.

It felt like a year before Friday rolled around and Chungha sent you a text, You coming tonight?

Abso-fucking-lutely, you replied, returning your eyes to the mirror as you raked mascara through your lashes.

The moment you hopped out of Chungha’s car and into the chaos that was the old vacant lot, you smiled for the first time in days. You strutted out in your leather boots, earning more than a few whistles and ignoring them all.

You were dressed in all black. Maybe you wanted to match Mark’s car, maybe not. If anyone asked, you would deny and swear it was all a coincidence.

Mark Lee wasn’t thinking about you; you sure as hell weren’t going to waste any more time on him.

Jeno approached you with a cigarette hanging from his lips, taking a long drag and blowing the smoke out of the corner of his mouth. “Hey, pretty,” he flirted under his breath.

You rolled your eyes. He never gave up. “Hi, Jeno.”

He scanned you up and down, undressing you with his eyes. “You are wasted on Mark,” he taunted in a low growl.

The brief mention of Mark’s name made you clench with longing. Fuck that. “Aren’t you friends?” you questioned, shooting him a look.

“We are. That’s why I can say shit like that.”

You bobbed your head, patience wearing thin.

Jeno reached for your hand, slowly leading you along toward his blood red car, and whispered, “All’s fair in love and war, princess. That’s the only rule around here.”

Your eyes darted past Jeno as a car revved loudly, pulling into the lot. The fact you recognized the sound of Mark’s car before even seeing it made your cheeks flush with heat. And annoyance.

Love and war, huh?

“Jeno,” you started, returning your attention to him. “Do me a favor and hold that thought.”

“Whatever you want, babe.”

You marched away from Jeno, your gaze on Mark as he got out of his car and greeted those around him. God, he had no business being that handsome. You thought about the little smirk on his lips when you’d kissed your way down his happy trail.

Mark met your eyes and rooted in place, looking like the wind was knocked out of him. Goddamn. Those black pants looked painted on. He smiled bashfully and scratched the back of his neck. An image of you bowing off his bed as you cried out in pleasure with his hand between your thighs had just popped into his head.

Sex complicated everything. As always.

You stopped. It had been your body’s natural reflex to head for the passenger seat of Mark’s car, where you rightfully belonged, but then your brain remembered just how mad he made you.

Mark narrowed his eyes, studying you. Like he could see right through you.

A tiny smile tugged at your lips and you sauntered back to Jeno, who was sporting the smuggest grin as he blew out another column of smoke and held out his arm to you. You slipped your hand into the crook of his elbow and made sure to send Mark a vengeful scowl as Jeno escorted you over to his car.

Mark bristled. Watching you get in that red car made his skin crawl.

Fine. You wanted to play? Mark would play with you.

Jeno was two cars behind Mark at the starting line. You held your breath as the countdown started and braced your hands and feet when he accelerated.

It wasn’t like riding with Mark, you quickly realized. Jeno drove jarringly fast and erratic, where Mark was swift but smooth. The sharp turns made your seatbelt dig into your neck and jostled you in place. You felt borderline nauseous and dizzy, and as the miles wound down, you closed your eyes, waiting for it to end.

Riding with Mark was a high. This was a bad trip.

“Second place,” Jeno said as you both got out of the car, back in the lot.

You wobbled a bit, tempted to kiss the steady ground beneath your feet, and told him, “Sorry I wasn’t much of a good luck charm.”

“Not for me,” Jeno quipped, looking past you.

You followed his gaze and watched Mark’s car pull up slowly, coming alongside you. The passenger window rolled down and Mark called, “Get in the car.”

Bending down to look inside, you shot him a glare and snapped, “Or what?”

“Baby,” Mark said, something dangerous in his voice. “Get in the car.”

You weren’t keen on being bossed, but your body was already moving before you could stop it. Sliding into the familiar car, Jeno waved at you with an amused laugh and you waved back as Mark rolled up the tinted window, hiding you from view.

He drove onto the highway, riding on the high of yet another victory. Neither of you spoke. Your eyes were on the city lights. You truly marveled Busan at night and how she came alive in the darkness.

A few times, you parted your lips, wanting to cut the tension, but no words would come. You didn’t know where you stood with Mark. A few days ago, you were in his bed, kissing him like you’d never kissed anyone before. Those rough hands had touched every part of you, stitching you back together with a gentleness that surprised you.

You’d been in relationships before. Many, to be exact. But not like this. This was different and it was killing you trying to figure out what it was that set Mark apart. The only conclusion you reached was that you felt this way because you would leave eventually. It took away any stakes. You weren’t gambling your heart, because you knew how it was going to end.

It wasn’t that Mark was special. No, that couldn’t be it. It was purely your circumstances. Mark was just another boy.

That’s not true, your heart said. You slowly turned, looking at Mark. The sight of him sent the butterflies in your stomach going crazy. Just like when someone mentioned his name, you got giddy, thinking, That’s my boy.

Was he yours?

Mark coasted to a stop on a dead end street. The trees were tall and thick, blocking out the moon and the stars. Hitting the parking break, Mark unbuckled his seatbelt and you mirrored him.

“I got your note,” he said, breaking the silence at last.

You smarted, “I’m guessing you didn’t appreciate the humor.”

“Why did you leave?”

“I told you, I needed a shower.”

Mark arched a brow. “Did I make you feel dirty?”

You smirked a little and whispered, “No more than I asked for.”

“Then cut the bullshit and tell me what I did wrong,” Mark said irritably.

“You did nothing wrong, Mark,” you huffed, reaching for him and clambering into his arms.

Mark clasped your waist and pushed his seat back, giving you more room to straddle his hips. He let you kiss him, settling his hands on your thighs, and smirked against your mouth.

He saw right through your little stunt with Jeno. You still wanted him. Almost as badly as he wanted you.

“Fuck,” you groaned, the kisses building harder and rougher. The windows started to fog over. There was only one way to break the tension; tension created from all these unspoken feelings you and Mark shared.

The car rocked softly from side to side. Your fingers were carded in Mark’s hair, his face between your breasts, sucking a bruise on your collarbone. You grinded into him and Mark bucked into you. You loved that he made no moves to take off your pants. Or his.

“You’re gonna make me come, baby,” Mark sighed into your mouth, sinking his fingers into your ass, steering your movements. His cock was painfully hard in his jeans, but the pressure and warmth of you stroking against it was enough to push him toward the edge.

You took his jaw in your hand and nibbled at his lips, whispering, “Come.”

Mark thrust up to meet you, seeking more friction, and spilled over, grunting and whining through his release, thighs shaking beneath you. You kept riding him through it, arching your hips. Mark hissed with sensitivity, but didn’t stop you.

That misty, fucked out look in his eyes was going to be the end of you. You lost yourself in them again.

When Mark snuck a hand between your legs, unbuttoning and unzipping your pants to bring his fingers to your swollen clit, you sucked in a breath and dug your nails into the seat, moaning in his ear.

“Don’t scratch the car,” Mark teased, scraping his teeth down your neck. “Scratch me all you want.”

You choked out his name, two of his fingers prodding into your wet hole while his thumb pressed and rolled your clit. You were already close from grinding on him that the hooking of his digits on your sweet spot and the pressure on your clit finished you. Tipping your head back, your face tensed with release and a mangled cry forced its way from your throat.

Mark grinned and grabbed your thighs, rocking into you a little, getting the last of those aftershocks out of you. Fuck, you were so beautiful when you came. He brushed his hands up and down your body, talking you back down from the high.

Panting loudly, you collapsed into him, resting your head on his shoulder and closing your eyes. You smiled as Mark coiled his arms around you and squeaked in surprise when he made the seat recline back. You lay there on top of him, waiting for your heart to settle back to normal.

Mark didn’t care that there was a wet mess in his pants. He loved your weight on his body too much. Eventually, he reached for your face, tilting your head so he could steal a kiss that shattered what was left of the walls around your heart.

You talked for a little while, making plans, catching up on the past week. Both of you apologized for the way things were left last Sunday. You for running away without a goodbye and him for not calling you to ask why.

Mark held your hand as he walked you to your front door, kissing you chastely in case your father was spying out the window.

When Mark started to leave, you squeezed his hand and tugged him back, wanting one more kiss before reluctantly going inside. Mark held you flush against him and kissed you hotly until you had your fill.

The next morning, your alarm woke you. It was unheard of for you to intentionally wake up at a reasonable hour on a Saturday of all days, but you had big plans. You packed a bag and told your dad you were having a sleepover at Chungha’s.

Which was, of course, a lie.

You did go to Chungha’s house though. She gladly agreed to cover for you.

At noon sharp, Mark arrived to get you. You hugged Chungha, thanking her again for participating in your little fib, and jogged out with your bag over your shoulder.

“What is this?” you exclaimed.

Mark didn’t come in his familiar car, but a goofy looking truck. Like a work van and an SUV had a lanky baby. “It’s a pop-up camper,” he told you with glee, holding out his hands toward it dramatically.

You skipped over to him, only content when you were in his arms. “Is this another one of your fixer-uppers?”

“Nah. I borrowed this bad boy from a friend.”

You pressed a cute kiss to his lips and said, “Let’s hit the road!”

Mark took the bag from your shoulder and added it with his in the back. He fired up the engine and pulled away, both of you waving to Chungha who had come out on her front porch to see the weird behemoth vehicle at the end of her drive.

You had the window down and propped your feet on the dashboard, feeling like a teenager again on a long road trip. The wind whipped through your hair and Mark turned the radio up, the two of you singing along dramatically to the latest hits.

“Chip me,” Mark said for the hundredth time. He had packed a big bag of snacks to keep you both fed on the drive. You placed a chip in his mouth as he drove and then ate another yourself. He made one stop at a rest area to use the bathroom and you eagerly checked yourself in the mirror to make sure you still looked cute despite your windblown hair.

Back on the road, Mark drove with one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh.

“Now, will you tell me where we’re going?” you asked for the hundredth time.

He was being very mum about the whole thing. “Nope,” Mark retorted.

You feigned a groan. “I hate surprises.”

Mark snickered and said, “Trust me. You’ll love this one.”

He drove into the hills until pavement turned to gravel. Until the trees blocked out any sign of the city below. Until you felt like only you and Mark existed in the world anymore.

You sighed. He was right. You loved it.

Rocks crunched under the tires as Mark parked in a small clearing. There was a firepit and a square wood building nestled under the trees you assumed had bathrooms and showers. A big plus for any wilderness excursion.

You jumped out of the car and jogged around to Mark’s side, watching him with delight and amusement as he fiddled with the buttons to get the camper to pop up. Even arguing with said buttons when they didn’t do what he wanted.

Eventually, the camper you would be calling home for the night was popped into position. “Okay, I had my doubts at first,” you said, climbing inside and laying on your stomach atop the mattress. “But this is actually kinda cool.”

Mark stood in the opening, bracing his hands on the edge, leaning in closer and closer until he was within reach of stealing a kiss. “You doubted me?” Mark exclaimed, dramatic. “I’m hurt. I’m devastated. I’m…”

You took his cheeks between your hands and smashed a big kiss on his lips.

“I’m better,” Mark quipped, scrunching his nose before asking for another kiss.

Together, you spent the afternoon talking and kissing. Sometimes you made out till you were breathless before coming back to your senses and having a conversation like nothing happened. At most, Mark played with your boobs or gave your ass a squeeze, but he never tried anything else.

Not until you gave him permission.

“How did you find this spot?”

Mark replied, “I come up here a couple times a year. Just to sit and think.”

You quirked a brow. “Alone?”

Mark nodded. “I’ve never brought anyone with me before, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

You fought a smile harder than ever before and said quietly, “I’m honored.”

Mark hid his face, not wanting you to see the adorable grin he was sporting.

You watched him fondly as Mark hunched over the fire pit, stoking the flames to life as the evening air began to chill. He surprised you by rifling in the camper and bringing out metal sticks, which you used to toast hot dogs and marshmallows over the fire until your bellies were full.

Mark liked that your kisses now tasted of marshmallows and melted chocolate.

“The college thing - what are you studying to be?” Mark asked as he stoked the flames, adding more wood to the pile.

You sat with your hands to the fire, warming them. “Promise you won’t laugh,” you said, nerves rushing up your chest.

“I promise. Tell me.”

Tugging your sleeves down over your hands, you smiled as Mark came over and sat down beside you, his side pressed against yours. “My degree is in biochemistry. I want…,” you hesitated, ever reminded that you had never told anyone about your ambitions. They were personal. Meaningful, but only to you. “I want to go into cancer research.”

Mark gaped, turning and looking at you with wide eyes. “Wow.”

“Yeah.” His reaction made you bashful, lowering your head because you couldn’t handle how he was looking at you.

Damn, Mark was thinking. He already knew you were well out of his league, but this confirmed it. “I think it’s cool that you found something you’re passionate about. Did you always know you wanted to study biochem?” he asked, curious.

The tears crept up on you, but you were an expert at holding them back. You’d been grieving your mother for so long, you’d learned to suffer in silence. “No. It was my mom. She died three years ago. Ovarian cancer.”

Mark’s heart sank. “Fuck. I’m sorry.”

You thanked him, comforted when he wrapped an arm around you and squeezed. It was a kind gesture and sorely needed. “I couldn’t do anything to help her, but maybe one day, I could help stop someone else from losing their mom,” you said somberly. It was your greatest dream, sparing someone from your pain.

Mark cupped your cheek and you didn’t notice you were crying until he caught an escaping tear on his thumb. “You can do it. You can kick cancer’s ass.”

You snorted, but the humor was welcome.

“Your mom would be proud of you,” Mark said, whispering your name sweetly.

Holding your breath, fighting the tears, you almost crumpled at his feet. Those were the words you always wanted to hear, wondering what you would have to do to ever hear your father utter them. Instead, Mark had given you that. It was a gift you would never be able to repay.

“I’ve never told anyone this.” You looked to Mark, eyes glistening with pain and hope.

Mark tucked some of your hair behind your ear. “You keep a lot of things to yourself. Don’t you, baby?”

You nodded.

Mark knew in that moment he would do anything to protect you. He had never felt that urge so strongly for anyone before. He wanted to be everything you needed. Everything you could ever want.

“You can share the hurt with me, you know,” Mark continued, kissing your temple. “I want to be that for you.”

You met his eyes, searching. Part of you was beginning to accept that you’d stumbled into something precious with Mark. Something beautiful and rare. Once in a lifetime. “Will you let me be that for you?” you asked softly.

Mark shifted a little. He unwound his arm from your shoulders, rubbing his hands together pensively. He exhaled, one deep breath after another, and finally said, “My dad is a drunk. My mom is a martyr. I haven’t seen either of them in years, but I send them money every month to keep them afloat.”

You listened intently.

“I have an older brother. He dipped outta here to have his own life,” Mark said with obvious resentment. “We don’t speak at all.”

“How long will you be paying your father’s debts?” you asked carefully.

“Till one of us dies, I guess,” Mark hissed through his teeth.

You bristled at the thought. Your brain was cycling through options, trying to figure out a way to get Mark out of this hell. “What if you left? Started over somewhere else?”

Mark simpered. He appreciated the thought. “I can’t leave. This is my home. My friends are here. I’ve built a life for myself that I love. Sure, I’ll be paying for my parents forever and I’ll probably never be able to own a house with a roof that doesn’t leak, but that’s okay. I don’t need much to be happy. Just a fast car and a pretty girl.”

You wilted a little, slipping into his arms and burying your head under his chin. Mark hugged you back tightly, watching the flames dance and convincing himself that the burning in his eyes was from the smoke and not his emotions.

The heavy conversation was over. For now. You and Mark had a newfound understanding of each other.

As the air grew colder, Mark steered you into the camper and draped a blanket over you before crawling in beside you. Together, you watched the sunset from the back.

You were on your stomach, your head propped in your hands, your ankles crossed in the air. “I think I’m falling in love with Busan,” you sighed wistfully after a while, hardly believing those goddamn forbidden words spilled out of your mouth so easily.

You blamed the views. You blamed the sunsets. You blamed the taste of the sea in every breath you took.

But most of all, you blamed Mark.

Mark nudged your shoulder and whispered, “Anything else you’re falling for?”

Heat rushed into your cheeks. You turned to him. Your face was serious, cracking under the weight of your feelings. Your eyes pierced right through him. You wanted to tell him that yes, you were falling in love with him too, but those words were far more forbidden than any profession of love for Busan.

Instead, you crashed your lips on his, hoping that would satisfy his question, because you weren’t ready to say how you felt. You were too fragile and it would break you.

Mark smiled knowingly against your mouth and kissed you back. Even though he’d been kissing you all day, every kiss and every touch made his heart race with that same rush he felt the first time you got in his car.

There was something different about you. Mark didn’t want to overanalyze, but he couldn’t help it. Once upon a time, Mark believed there was someone out there for everyone - even someone as messed up as him - but life had broken that hope out of him. You were changing his mind and his heart. You were making Mark want more for himself.

Maybe there was someone out there capable of loving him. Maybe he’d found her and she was in his arms, kissing him with abandon.

You pawed at Mark, pushing at his shoulders until he rolled to his back and you climbed on top of him, your breasts flush against his chest. Mark reached down to grab handfuls of your ass before locking his arms around your waist, trapping you to him.

You broke from the kiss and stroked your finger over his lips affectionately, asking, “Did you bring condoms?”

Mark nodded. “Yeah,” he rasped, trying to keep up with the rush of your kisses. There was an adorable crimson across his cheeks. “Is that okay? I mean, I wasn’t expecting us to have sex or anything if you don’t want to. I just wanted to have them on hand in case… you know, we were in the mood. Or something.”

You giggled at his nerves. “Mark,” you said sternly, cutting his rambling short. “This has been the most romantic date of my life. Of course, I wanna have sex with you.”

Mark relaxed, but his pupils turned into endless pools of arousal.

Stealing a quick kiss, hoping to settle him down, you flirted, “If you want me.”

“I’ve wanted you since day one, baby,” Mark purred, running his fingers up and down your back.

You smiled. That makes two of us. The wind swept into your hair as you kissed him again, this time a little slower, a little deeper. A taste of things to come.

Sunset splashed the last of its colors over the horizon, growing darker with every passing second. Night still came swiftly, though winter was almost over. And even with the back doors of the camper open, you couldn’t get chilled with the heat kindling between your bodies.

It was exciting; the thought of having sex with Mark out in the open. The camper provided plenty of privacy, of course, but when neither you or Mark suggested closing the back door, you grinned with mischief.

Mark thrust his hips up into yours, rubbing his clothed cock against you. He moaned at the weight of you on top of him and the catch in your breath as you kissed him. Neither of you were in much hurry, knowing you had all night to play.

Sitting up, bracing your hands on his abs, you asked, “Is there any chance someone will walk in on us?”

Mark shook his head. “I rented this spot,” he said, his voice low and husky. “It’s all ours.”

“Good.” With that, you stripped out of your shirt and unclasped your bra.

Mark’s hands flew to your breasts, squeezing them together, kneading them in his palms. It had only been a week, but fuck, Mark missed your beautiful body.

Meanwhile, you tugged off his shirt and teased your fingers over his nipples, much like he was toying with yours, and scraped your nails down his stomach, biting your lip at how rapidly he was breathing.

You bent down to kiss him, breaking away just as he started to slip you his tongue, and dragged your lips down his neck, nibbling beneath his ear and sucking at the base of his throat. You shimmied your hips, grinding on the bulge in his jeans, and kept kissing your way down his body, tonguing between his abs and through his happy trail.

“Fuck,” Mark groaned, eyes fluttering. “You’re gonna kill me.”

You chuckled, unfastening his pants and yanking them down his legs. Seeing his cock standing at attention, knowing he was hard and aching for you, made your mouth water and you rewarded his need by sealing your lips around his tip.

Mark whined your name, gathering your hair messily in his hand. He kept lifting his head and dropping it back to the mattress with a thud, because watching you slowly bob up and down with your pretty lips around his dick was going to ruin him in record time.

There was a lewd squelch when he pushed into the back of your throat, followed by Mark moaning, which caused a familiar tightening between your legs. You choked on him again and again, until tears pricked in your eyes. It was worth it to hear those sounds he made.

When you picked up the pace, Mark grit his teeth and pried you away. “Stop. Stop. Stop,” he chanted, breathless. “I don’t wanna come yet.”

You sat up, trembling with lust, because goddamn, had you ever craved someone this badly? Chuckling at the weakness in his voice, you smoothed your hand up his stomach and chest, and asked, “Where are the condoms?”

Mark sat up and crawled over to the backpack he’d brought. As he rifled through it, you took the opportunity to strip out of your pants and given the ache he’d caused between your legs, you traveled a hand down between your folds and rolled your clit with your fingertips.

Imagine Mark’s surprise when he turned around, condom packet in hand, and saw you touching yourself. For a second or two, he just gawked, swallowing the lump in his throat. As if his cock could get any harder after you just choked on it. “Fuck,” he said, lingering on the word with the most guttural growl you’d ever heard.

You brought your slick fingers to his lips and Mark readily sucked them into his mouth, laving the digits with his tongue, tasting every drop. The moment he had, you took the condom from his hand and steered him by the shoulders to lay on his back again.

Mark thought he was going to burst. Especially with you taking charge. You had barely spoken, but he was willing to do anything you wanted with a mere touch of your fingers.

You straddled his thighs while you opened the packet and rolled the condom down his cock. Mark hummed as you did so, clenching every muscle in his body to keep from bucking into your hand. He wanted to be inside you so bad, but he didn’t want to beg.

Though you would have loved if he did.

You grabbed his hands and guided them to your waist, and you lifted up, holding onto his arms for balance and slowly sinking down on his cock. A little whine escaped you. Then a moan once he pressed deeper into your core, stretching you open to fit until you gloved around his length.

Mark’s jaw was unhinged. He let out the breath he’d been holding once he was sheathed inside you, groaning at the scalding heat of you around him. He relaxed his grip on your waist, realizing his fingers were sinking in to the point of bruising your soft skin.

“Mark,” you sighed, eyes closed. You rocked your hips tentatively, sucking in a breath as his cock pushed against your walls.

“You feel so fucking good,” Mark hissed, moaning your name. “Fuck.” He roamed his hands over you, palming your breasts and you grabbed at his hands, lacing your fingers through his and starting to bounce on his hard cock.

You opened your eyes and peered down at him. You bit your lip to fight a smile, because Mark was staring up at you in worship while you rode his dick, like no woman before you and no woman after would ever feel as good as you.

Mark grunted when your bodies collided. His breaths were loud and labored. Every other word out of his mouth was, “Fuck,” and you loved how it sounded on his lips. You couldn’t resist propping yourself over him and taking his bottom lip between your teeth. And Mark couldn’t resist kissing you, ravenous.

“I’m gonna come. Mark…,” you whimpered, taking pleasure from his body until your thighs burned with the effort. You were losing yourself in him, in how he made you feel. He was so deep and hard in the pit of your stomach, stroking you just right to ecstasy.

Mark growled and set his fingers into the flesh of your hips. He stared up at you, unblinking, and rasped, “Come. Come all over that dick. Like you did on my fingers and my face. I wanna feel that pussy come.”

You sucked in a breath and your eyes rolled back as release crashed into you, taking you higher and higher until your body shuddered out of your control. You could feel Mark rutting his cock into you, swearing and groaning as you tightened and gushed around his cock. “Fuck,” you cried out, one last tremor ripping through you.

“That’s my good girl,” Mark whispered, lifting his hips a little to sink back and forth in your slick cunt, pulsing with orgasm. “Atta girl.”

“Holy shit,” you huffed, running a hand through your hair, pulling the strands out of your face. You panted for breath and shivered as the sweat on your skin cooled. Looking down at Mark, you blinked to clear the daze in your eyes and moaned softly at his stiff cock languidly pumping inside you. “Are you close?”

Mark nodded.

You reached behind to grab his thighs, grinding yourself onto him, your movements sounding wetter than before. “How do you want it?”

“Kiss me.”

You smiled and obeyed without a second thought, kissing him intimately, teasing your tongue into his mouth.

Mark slowly slipped his arms around you, tightening until you were flush against him, and raised his hips, shoving his cock into you deep. His breaths were hot on your throat. You let out a moan and then another as he sped up, his pace growing, his thrusts hard and fast.

“Mark,” you chanted his name like a mantra, mouth open, eyes closed. Mark’s hand was heavy on the nape of your neck, keeping you in place, making you take his cock. You gripped the mattress on opposite sides of his shoulders, moaning until your voice broke.

A howl of your name followed an endless string of curses and Mark gave one final thrust into the vice of your cunt, driving in balls deep and finishing into the condom. You instinctively clenched on him, milking his release, watching the bliss take over his face.

Smirking down at him, coaxing him through his orgasm with little nothings like he had yours, you nibbled at his parted lips, kissing the corner of his mouth with affection and rocking your hips gently.

Mark heaved a breath, going limp underneath you. He blinked and finally met your eyes again, chuckling when he realized how hard he came. “Was I too rough?” he asked worriedly.

“No,” you assured him. “You were perfect.” You brushed some of the damp hair from his brow with your fingertips.

Relieved, Mark lifted his head to kiss your swollen lips. He made a low sound when you clambered off of him, his soft cock slipping from your folds, and got up to dispose of the condom.

“That was amazing,” Mark said when he returned to you, covering your naked body in the blanket.

“Yeah,” was all you could say. It was amazing. It was way better than you imagined it would be.

And it reinforced that you were completely and utterly fucked.

Mark rolled toward you and tightened his arm around your waist, burying his face in your neck and gently nibbling beneath your ear. If you didn’t know any better, you would think he was trying to rile you up again.

“I can’t believe I found you,” he whispered into your skin.

You stared straight ahead, spacing out. Tears were gathering in your eyes.

Fuck, you thought, scared to death. I love him.

You were in love with Mark and there was no use in fighting it, no matter how badly you didn’t want to be that girl who fell in love so easily. You protected your heart with an iron fist, but you let Mark waltz right in and make himself comfortable.

Mark slipped his fingers over your cheek and made you look at him. He searched your face and his eyes narrowed, trying to read what was going through your mind and asking cutely, “Where did you go, baby?”

You forced a smile for his sake. “You’re pussy drunk right now,” you quipped, resorting to humor to hide how hard you were dismantling in his arms.

Mark cocked his head and fixed you with a look. He was a little stern when he said, “That doesn’t mean how I feel about you isn’t real.”

You smiled and this time it was genuine. Your smile deepened when he leaned in and met his lips to yours tenderly. As the kisses grew, you spread your legs, inviting him to take you again. And again and again, until there was nothing left of you.

Mark crushed you beneath his weight, snapping his hips between your thighs, driving into your sweet spot. His grip on your hair was brutal, but so were your fingernails in his back. You cried out. You screamed his name until you were hoarse. He filled you with his cock and made you come until you were spent.

“I can’t,” you whimpered, eyes pressed closed. You were shaking. He was breaking you, body and soul.

Mark tightened his fist in your hair and bit down on your shoulder. He’d never fucked someone so hard, but he knew you could take it. He needed you to take him. All of him. Everything he had to give.

“I’m not stopping till you come,” Mark said between thrusts, burying himself inside you until he didn’t know where you ended and he began.

You locked your arms and legs around him, and you cried his name. I love you. I love you, you thought, but bit your tongue. You dared not say it. Once you did, you could never take it back.

Release saved you from letting those words escape. You arched into him, lips parted as the tears slipped from your eyes. Mark let out the deepest moan, feeling you unravel around him.

You had never been drowned in passion before, but it was a fucking beautiful way to die.

In the morning, you could barely move. Mark fared no better. He was snoring like a freight train, undoubtedly lost in the best sleep of his life. You hid a giggle at his expense and nestled deeper into his arms, drifting off again.

It was late in the afternoon when Mark brought you to Chungha’s house. She came out with a shirtless Jaemin in tow to check out the pop-up camper, which made the two of them decide they would like to do something similar on their anniversary. The four of you talked in Chungha’s front yard and only dispersed when the sun began to set and Chungha needed to drive you home.

So began a long week of waiting to see Mark again. Keeping yourself occupied in the meantime, you tried thinking of a plan that would get him out from under his family’s debt. What if you brought him along back home? He could have a fresh start there. Nothing hanging over his head. Maybe your dad would help find him a decent job while you were in grad school. The two of you could possibly share an apartment or something.

You scribbled on the notebook, crossing out ideas and circling others. Every so often, you would have a crisis of the heart, ripping out the pages and tossing them in the bin before fishing them out after you remembered how much love you had for Mark.

Did it still scare you? Yes. But you’d started to accept that the greatest loves were unnerving. There was so much to lose, but so much to gain.

You immediately noticed something was wrong with Chungha when she picked you up on Friday night. At first you pried, but she was tight-lipped. You asked if everything was alright with Jaemin and she assured you all was well. Not wanting to be too nosy, you let it go, hoping she would talk to you when she was ready.

Chungha kept glancing over at you. She was running out of time to gather enough courage.

Parking in the lot, brimming with people and cars, you hopped out excitedly, though you knew Mark would be fashionably late as always. Opting to go chat with Haechan as you usually did, Chungha called your name. You whipped around and she took your hand in hers, speaking in hushed tones, “Listen, I need to tell you something. There’s something you need to know.”

“Sure,” you replied, totally unsuspecting. “What’s up?”

“I was talking to Jaemin last night. I swear, pussy makes him bear his soul to me,” she said. The attempt at humor was weak, because her voice was shaking. “I know all his secrets at this point and he let slip that the boys have a bet going around.”

Your heart sank into the pit of your stomach, never to be found again. “About me?”

She nodded. “Yeah, about you. They set it up the first night you came… betting on who can sleep with you first.”

You could only imagine what the expression on your face looked like at that moment. You fought back the sudden urge to either punch the nearest boy - the boys you thought were your friends - or cry your eyes out. Stiffening, you spoke through clenched jaws, “Who’s the favorite to win?”

Chungha sighed your name.

“I’m curious. It’s not like my heart is on the line or anything.”

If only she knew that the floor had been ripped out beneath your feet. You were falling and drowning with not a goddamn soul coming to save you. You were thinking of all the things you told that stupid boy. All the things you did. How you gave him the keys to your heart and trusted him to protect it.

“Mark,” she finally said.

You weren’t surprised. It was a given. Jeno was undoubtedly the other option, considering his persistent advances. “That’s a shame,” you sighed, feigning indifference. “Not much of a payout.”

Her brows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

Your eyes stung with the memories. They turned to ashes in your mouth. “We had sex last weekend, obviously. I hope you bet on him.”

Chungha recoiled like she’d been slapped and her tone shifted to anger. “I didn’t bet. Why the hell would I do that? I just found out about it last night!”

You brushed her hand from your arm and started to walk away. “I don’t know, Chungha. Did they have a wager going around on your body?”

Chungha followed you worriedly. “No.”

You shook your head and whispered, mostly to yourself, “I’m the outsider. I guess, I always will be.”

How could you be so goddamn stupid? With the benefit of hindsight, all the signs were there.

Chungha got ahead of you, barring herself in your path and taking your arms in her hands. “That’s not true. Everyone really likes you. You’re fitting in around here.”

You spat, “Not enough to cancel the bet though. Right?”

Chungha looked pained. Her eyes were welling up. Someone she considered a friend was hurt and there was nothing she could do to fix it. Matter of fact, she felt personally responsible for the whole thing happening in the first place.

She introduced you to the guys. To Mark.

“I wish I had found out sooner. I could have stopped you from…,” Chungha trailed. She didn’t want to rub salt in the wound.

Every inch of you tensed. You were back in that camper, sleeping in Mark’s arms, his fingers playing with your hair. You gave him everything; you had nothing left. There was nothing he didn’t know about you. You could still hear the crickets. You could still feel the wind on your hot skin. You could still taste Mark’s kisses on your tongue.

And the worst part was you allowed yourself to be vulnerable with Mark.

Fuck. You had never known a pain like this. Not since you buried your mother.

You finished, “From having sex with Mark? Yeah, too late. But it’s okay. The sex was great. Totally memorable.”

Chungha crooned your name. “You’re hurt. It’s okay to be hurt.”

No, it wasn’t. There was no way in hell you could accept someone’s pity, regardless of how much you needed it. You laughed, but it was empty. Like your chest. “I’m not hurt. I would never give a fuckboy like Mark the power to hurt me.”

Chungha sniffed back tears. “I’m so sorry.”

You took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. I’ll talk to you later. Okay?”

She nodded.

You started walking. Where you were going, you didn’t really know, but you sure as hell couldn’t stay on that lot. Home was an entire continent away. You certainly didn’t want to see your father either. He was the one that brought you here. None of this would have happened if you had never left home.

“Fuck.” You were so goddamn sick of being punished for love. You loved your mother more than anyone in the world and you were taken away from the home you shared with her. You loved Mark with what was left of your heart and he crushed it the moment you handed it over.

Folding your arms tightly across your chest, you kept your head down and stared at your feet, one step in front of the other. You were dissociating a little. Your heart couldn’t handle this much torment so it chose not to.

Your mind was blank and eventually, the tears dried on your cheeks. Eventually, you breathed heavier from the sheer distance you’d walked. Eventually, you gave up on trying to reason with yourself.

The sound of tires on gravel made the hairs on your neck stand up. Adrenaline ripped its way up your spine, because you knew who it was.

Mark’s car slowed alongside you and he rolled down the window, calling your name. “I’ve been trying to call you.”

You ignored him. Just like you ignored the phone that had been vibrating constantly in your back pocket. One foot in front of the other, you told yourself.

Mark said your name impatiently this time and got the same result. So, he put the car in park and jumped out. Jogging over to you, Mark grabbed your arm to stop you and asked, “What the hell are you doing out here? Do you even know where you’re going?”

The moment you heard his car, you began rehearsing what you would say to him and yet, the entire speech you prepared disintegrated the moment you opened your mouth. Anger took hold of your reins and demanded you snap, “How much did you bet?”

The color drained from Mark’s face. “What?”

You gave him a smile full of venom and mocked, “You’re a smart boy, Mark. Don’t play dumb now. How much was I worth to you? What magic number did you set on my body?”

Mark shook his head and reached for your waist, wanting to hold you. “That doesn’t matter.”

You stepped back, batting his hands away. “Like hell it does. How much did you win? I may want my cut.”

“I called the bet off. I told everyone to take their money back,” Mark told you frantically.

You believed him, but that didn’t matter. He did it after you slept with him, which meant he did it out of a guilty conscience only after he won his prize.

“Why? You won. You should collect. Although I heard you were the heavy favorite. I doubt you made a lot of money on me.”

Mark was in a panic. At some point in his relationship with you, he forgot about the stupid bet. And no one reminded him. It didn’t hit him until that night, when he was dozing off with his head on your naked chest.

“I didn’t make any. I called it off,” he said, trembling. The girl he loved was looking at him with nothing short of hatred and Mark couldn’t take it.

He couldn’t accept that he’d fucked up the most beautiful thing in his life. It was what he did best, but he’d tried for you to be better. He’d tried so hard.

“Why?” you pressed. As if there was any reason that would make you feel better.

“Because it wasn’t right. It was stupid. It was…”

“Foul.”

“Yeah.”

You bristled. Animosity and hurt bubbled in your throat until you felt capable of breathing fire. “So,” you started, voice breaking as emotion got the better of you. “You did all of this just to fuck me?”

“No,” Mark said, but he knew you would never believe him.

You wiped your tears roughly with a fist and snapped, “The joke is on you. I would have fucked you on the first night. You’re the one that did all the extra shit.”

There was obvious pleading in Mark’s voice. “Because I wanted to get to know you.”

You scoffed. “Well, now you know what I taste like. We good?”

“I fucked up.”

“You fucked up. Got it. Will you get out of my way now?”

“No, I…,” Mark hesitated, reaching for you again. “I want to know where we stand.”

You folded your arms, making yourself totally uninviting. “Right now you’re standing in my way and I would like for you to move.”

Mark tried to draw you toward him and whispered, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

You swatted his hands away again and groaned. “For the love of… Mark, get out of my way.”

“No,” he shot back. “I don’t want to lose you. I can’t!”

You laughed. “You never had me in the first place.”

“Yes, I did. You’re mine.”

“I’m not and I never will be.”

Mark cursed loudly and tipped his head back, heaving a breath. “That’s it then?” he asked, throwing up his arms. “You’re done with me over this? After everything we said and did?”

You bristled. You did not want to be reminded of that. How much of yourself you shared with him. It was the biggest regret of your life now. “I’m done with you, because I got what I wanted from you. That’s why I’m not mad about the whole dumb bet thing. Maybe if the sex had been horrible I’d be pissed off, but…”

“You’re lying and I deserve it,” Mark countered, tempted to drop to his knees at your feet. “I deserve whatever punishment you wanna give me, but you don’t you dare walk away.”

“The irony,” you sneered. You wanted to hurt him like he’d hurt you. “You’re the one refusing to let go.”

Mark blocked you again and this time he boldly took your face in his hands, tilting you up to meet his eyes. “I want you and you want me.”

Something inside you had enough and finally snapped.

“I wanna go home,” you screamed at the top of your lungs, bracing your hands on his chest and shoving him away from you. You couldn’t hold yourself together anymore. Not when he kept poking and prodding at your carefully made armor. “The second I can get away from here, I’m going home. I’ll leave this place and I’ll leave you!”

Mark sighed and his shoulders dropped.

You wiped the flood of tears racing down your cheeks and rasped, “I never wanted to be here in the first place. I didn’t want to meet you. I don’t want to have feelings for you.”

Mark blinked at that. He opened his mouth to tell you he loved you, that he would do anything to make you stay, but you didn’t give him the chance.

You shuddered with rage and shame in a brutal, painful combination and shouted, “Don’t you understand that you’ve ruined everything? You ruined me! You had me second guessing everything I want and for what - a fucking bet?”

Mark whispered your name. His eyes shone with tears.

“I told you about my mother,” you sobbed, frantically drying your tears with your sleeves. They were cruel evidence of how much you cared. How badly he hurt you.

“I’m sorry,” was all he said. Mark didn’t know what else to do. Nothing was enough to fix the damage he’d done.

“God, shut up,” you huffed, defeat washing over you. “Don’t be sorry. Just… please, get out of my way.”

Mark studied you for a long, pensive moment, weighing his options, and ultimately sidestepped out of your path.

You started marching forward the moment he did, brushing past him roughly as you folded your arms and looked down at your feet. One step in front of the other.

It didn’t surprise you that Mark got back in his car and started to follow you. He kept a short distance in your wake, making sure you were safe. He would never, no matter what you said, leave you out in the dark on your own.

After a few minutes, you stopped and the car braked behind you. You couldn’t breathe. You held your stomach, doubling over as sobs racked through your body. More than anything, you missed your mom. She was the attachment to home.

You so badly wanted her to hold you. She could make the pain go away.

Mark got out and approached you cautiously, but he knew the fight had left you. He gathered you in his arms, lifting you up.

“I trusted you,” you cried, letting him carry you over to the car. “You made me think that you loved me.”

Everything, every moment spent with him, was built on a lie.

Mark said nothing, buckling you into the passenger seat. He drove around until you fell asleep, exhausted from crying. I fell in love with you, he thought sadly, his cheeks stained with tears too. But you will never believe me now.

When you woke up, you were in your driveway. Mark had opened your door and was crouched beside you, whispering your name. You blinked to clear your vision and swallowed the painful lump in your throat, asking what happened.

Mark stood up and moved out of the way, revealing your father, who quickly helped you out of the car and started leading you into the house.

“You should take her home,” Mark called out to your dad, consumed with guilt and regret. “She’s not happy here.”

Your father didn’t respond, but you knew he heard and you watched Mark’s car speed off into the night before finally going inside.

The next day, you didn’t get out of bed. Or the day after that. Your dad brought food to you that he ordered, but you picked at it. You had no appetite. You just wanted to sleep forever. Or at least until the hollow ache in your chest was gone.

So, this is what it feels like, huh? To get your heart broken by a boy?

This shit sucks.

It felt even worse when you thought about just how much you’d loved him. How you’d even felt guilty for loving him.

You remembered how you’d looked up at him, holding his face in your hands as he rocked into you slowly, your eyes fluttering closed when he kissed you. It was reckless and all-consuming, and you’d never felt so alive.

After everything, you still missed him. You hid beneath the covers and tried to linger in how it had felt to be so small in his arms. So safe and loved.

But none of it was real. The whole time, he just wanted to take you for himself. Did he get a bonus for breaking you in the process?

Chungha came by. Your father let her in and she walked right into your room and crawled onto the bed, spooning you over the blankets.

You barely reacted, but you didn’t turn her away either.

“Would it make you feel better to know that I ripped all of the boys a new asshole?” Chungha joked.

“A little,” you muttered into your pillow.

She told you that all races had been canceled until further notice because of the rift between the boys. The fallout over the bet had resulted in a huge fight. Things were said. Objects were thrown.

Chungha added, “I’m also not giving Jaemin any sexy time for not telling me about it sooner.”

You made a noise. Something between a scoff and a laugh.

Chungha leaned her head against yours and rubbed your back comfortingly. Eventually, you hugged her and she squeezed you tightly, sending warmth through your chest that maybe - just maybe - you would be okay.

And you realized that through it all, you had actually made a friend in Chungha. A really good friend that you would miss terribly when you left.

Your next visitor caught you off guard.

Sitting on the sofa in some sweatpants and a hoodie, you whined in annoyance when the doorbell rang. You had fully intended to spend the day curled up in front of the television binging some shows and crushing a pint of cookie dough ice cream.

It was Friday and you had finally made it out of bed. Your pain wasn’t so acute now. The grieving stage was ending and you were reluctantly moving into recovery.

Opening the door, you immediately frowned. “What the hell do you want, Jeno?”

Jeno wasn’t sporting his usual asshole air of superiority for once. “Can I come in? I really wanna talk to you,” he said politely.

“No and no,” you replied, pursing your lips. “I have nothing to say to you.”

Jeno braced a hand on the door, keeping it from closing, and you scowled at him furiously. Did he have any idea what he’d done? What he had taken from you?

“If you wanna hate someone, hate me,” Jeno exclaimed, determined. “The bet was my idea. It was juvenile and wrong on so many levels and I regret it. I’m sorry.”

You snipped. “Fine. You’re sorry.”

“We hustle to survive. Everything is about scraping together money so we can survive another week. It’s not an excuse, but that shit finally caught up with us.”

You frowned with contempt.

“Mark had nothing to do with it,” Jeno pressed. He sounded almost desperate. “He called the whole thing off.”

“I know he did.”

Jeno matched your frustration and kicked it up a notch, chiding, “Then, doesn’t that count for something to you?”

“I don’t know,” you said quietly, relenting only for a moment.

Jeno sighed.

You wrapped your arms around yourself as if warding off a sudden chill and rubbed them in self soothing. “I don’t know how to feel anymore. I’ve spent every day missing home, counting down the minutes until I can go home, but when I was with him, I didn’t miss home anymore. And I hate that.”

“This is your home now.”

You flinched. That was heresy. “Fuck off,” you barked, trying once again to slam the door in his face.

Jeno stopped you again, though he made no moves to come inside. “Tell me I’m wrong,” he argued.

You let your hand fall from the door in defeat. After a pause, you asked, “Do you have any idea how this feels?”

“Yeah, I do.”

At first, you were resistant to that, but by the look on Jeno’s face, you actually believed him. “How did you get over it?”

“I left everything behind once too,” Jeno confessed with a heavy sigh. “I made friends here. I fell in love here. This became my home. It doesn’t mean I love my old home any less, but I know this is where I belong now.”

You hung your head. “You’re lucky.”

“So are you. Mark is in love with you.”

The mere mention of his name made you bristle with anger, but maybe irritation was better than hatred. You were recovering. “Mark doesn’t love me,” you said through grit teeth.

“He showed you his old cars.”

“What the hell does that matter?”

Jeno said with a growing smile, “He’s never shown them to anybody. Not even any of us. They’re his babies. That’s like him cutting open his chest and letting you see his heart.”

Don’t do that. Don’t give me hope. “You’re dramatic,” you droned with a roll of your eyes. But they were sparkling as they rolled.

Jeno nodded his head proudly. “Oh, absolutely. But that doesn’t make it any less true.”

You leaned against the doorway, thinking. Hoping. Maybe wishing. After a moment to collect your thoughts, you asked, “Where is he?”

“Sulking somewhere. He feels like a steaming pile of shit. Just like me.” Jeno grimaced for effect.

“What did he say… when he ended the bet?” That was the question lingering in your brain. Chungha didn’t know what all went down, but you wanted to know.

“That he had forgotten about it. That he was too busy falling in love with you to remember. And that if any of us didn’t take our money back, he would fuck us up. He also threw his shoe at my head.”

You snorted.

Jeno slipped his hands into his pockets and paced away from you, looking like he was going to leave. He stopped at the stairs and turned back around, saying, “You taught us a valuable lesson, I think. We were careless and we got two people that we care about hurt.”

You blinked in surprise and looked at him curiously. “You care about me?”

Jeno shrugged, but his smile betrayed him as he replied sweetly, “We all do. We kinda fell in love with you too. We want you to stick around. Hell, Haechan likes you so much he won’t even speak to any of us until you accept our apologies.”

You chuckled and it was the first time you’d laughed in days.

Jeno turned serious and said your name. “I’m really sorry.”

Something inside you healed a little.

“I’m the bravest of the bunch so I’m here first. Plus the bet was my idea. I felt I should make amends first. Expect an apology every one to two business days until the circle of stupid guys runs out.”

“I forgive you,” you said sincerely, tears blurring your eyes.

“Thank you,” Jeno said, closing the distance and holding out his arms. You hugged him without hesitation and he asked, “Does this mean we’re friends?”

You pulled back, nodding. “Yes, but I think you owe me one.”

“I owe you plenty,” Jeno retorted.

The idea was already spinning around in your head. It would be killing two birds with one stone. “Tell everyone the race is back on for tonight and make sure all the boys are at the starting line.”

Jeno grinned. “You got it.”

When you returned to the familiar lot of roaring cars, you strutted in like you owned it. This place didn’t defeat you like you thought. From boy to boy you went, collecting apologies under Chungha’s threatening glare. Although it was hardly necessary.

Renjun to Jisung and everyone in between expressed genuine remorse for hurting you and you forgave them. The forgiveness was more for you than for them. You were ready to move on.

You were finally ready to let Busan be your new home.

The black car drove in last, as expected. You kept your back to it, talking to Haechan, but when you heard Mark’s voice, you made sure to turn around. He looked exhausted. There were dark circles under his eyes. His long hair was messy. And a deep frown stayed on his handsome face.

He almost looked as broken as you felt.

Mark acknowledged no one cheerfully as he usually did. He was polite to those who had come to watch when they greeted him, but he had only vicious glares for his friends.

As he leaned back against his car, Mark’s eyes locked with yours and his entire expression changed. Shock? Hope? Relief? All of the above.

You were content to drag it out for a moment, staring back at him just as fiercely, before returning to your conversation with Haechan and ignoring the boy that had made butterflies start up in your stomach.

“Make him suffer,” Haechan said playfully, wiggling his brows. “He deserves it.”

You murmured, “I’ve forgiven him. He just doesn’t know it yet.”

“You know, there’s some great colleges around here.”

“I’m already looking into it.”

Haechan grinned from ear to ear.

When the cars lined up, the race gearing up to begin, you sauntered up to Mark’s passenger side and cleared your throat, waiting expectantly.

Mark rushed over, opening the door for you and closing it once you slid inside.

You didn’t speak to him. You quite liked the tension inside his car. Mark constantly looked over at you; you could tell he was desperately trying to find the words to say.

Then, in a blink, the race began and the air knocked out of your lungs, making adrenaline rush through every inch of you like the most potent drug.

Mark drove like he always did - expert. Perfect. He was smoother than silk around the turns. He accelerated cleanly, shifting gears to speed up. The car was an extension of his body. She obeyed even the tiniest nudge of his fingers.

“Mark,” you finally spoke up.

“Yes?”

“I will forgive you... if you lose.”

He gawked, turning to you briefly in disbelief. “What?”

You repeated yourself firmly, “Lose the race.”

Mark shook his head vehemently and whined, “Do you have any idea how much I have riding on this?”

“A relationship with me,” you smarted.

Mark blinked in realization. And then, he took his foot off the gas pedal without another word.

You grinned in satisfaction, watching the other cars overtake him at lightning speed. Mark’s car trailed the pack, sticking to Yangyang’s bumper.

“You’re in last place now?” you asked coyly.

“Yes. I’m in dead last. Are you happy?”

“Actually, I am.”

Mark scoffed. “Pfft.”

You glanced around, piecing together the surroundings, and asked like you didn’t have a care in the world, “How much race is left?”

“A couple miles,” Mark answered, brows stitching. “Maybe more.”

“If you win, I’ll go home with you.”

Mark groaned loudly. “You little brat.”

You turned to him, full of mischief, and said, “Do we have a deal?”

Mark looked at you and a smile spread across his lips. “If I win, you have to believe me when I tell you I’m in love with you.”

Your eyes widened a little. It seemed a fair enough request. You grabbed his face quickly and pressed a swift kiss to his lips. “Impress me, Mark,” you taunted, settling deeper into the seat in preparation of what was to come.

Mark reached over and yanked your seatbelt to make sure it was taut, just as he had the night you met, and slammed his foot on the gas pedal.

The adrenaline, the excitement, you knew now that it had nothing to do with the fast car and had everything to do with the boy who’d driven away with your heart.

Copyright 2020-2024 © yutaholic (formerly zenyukhei) All rights reserved do not copy or translate without my permission!

[inkribbon796]

Forgotten Light Ch. 3 I’m All Rainbow, All the Time

Summary: Thomas is back, and no one is sure what to do about that.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3

Everyone in the base was braced. None of them, not even King or Mare had dealt with or seen a demon like this. They had only heard rumors. Rumors of temperament creatures that lashed out with no warning, driven only by near animalistic emotions.

“Joan?” Thomas asked in confusion, reaching up to hold the side of his head.

“Yeah buddy, you okay?” Joan knelt down. “Took quite a bad fall, buddy.”

“Ugh,” Thomas moved to a seated position. “I feel like it.”

“You okay, can I get you anything?” Joan asked. “Your head hurt? You want me to get you something?”

“Yeah, I,” Thomas looked around in confusion, realizing that he wasn’t in his old apartment he used to share with a couple of his friends. “Where are we?”

“I know it’s super confusing but we’re safe right now, let me get you something for your head,” Joan promised, gesturing to a seat.

Down the hall, Virgil felt weird. His heart was racing with more than just apprehension over Thomas being freed. Now he felt something deeper, like he was being pulled somewhere or in like a limbo space waiting to be moved somewhere else. Virgil clutched onto Roman’s sleeve for dear life.

Joan smiled and Thomas got up on shaky legs, almost falling forward but Joan caught him and helped him into a chair. “Just sit tight, we’ve got coffee, juice, soda, water?”

“Just water’s good,” Thomas looked around, Nate tensed when he stared in his direction a touch too long. “I . . . Who’s house is this?”

Joan opened their mouth to answer — they were actually going to redirect the conversation — as they were getting a glass of water and some random painkillers they always had stashed in the common room for little aches and pains any of the heroes so often got from their line of work. Before Thomas could hear their answer a sharp shock of pain shot through his brain, it was one all the Sides felt regardless of their distance to Thomas.

The pain brought with it brief flashes of memory. Of alarm as something was dropped, and then relief of catching the object . . . followed by pain so intense and deep his body couldn’t process it.

“Thom—” Joan began, watching Thomas double over in pain before he froze because suddenly wisps of blue aura appeared before Logan and Patton materialized out of almost thin air. They had been standing down the hall with Roman and Virgil, and suddenly it felt like something had shoved them away.

Thomas still had his eyes closed for a second as the dull throbbing subsided down again, Logan realized with minute horror that Thomas would see himself and Patton and there was nothing he could do to stop that.

The world seemed to come to a tense halt as Thomas startled at their presence, and Patton spoke.

“Hey there kiddo,” Patton greeted loudly, he’d had plans to rush out before Logan could because the logical Side had been asked to make enough sacrifices lately in Patton’s mind. But this worked as well, Logan wouldn’t have to be alone.

“Who?” Thomas stared in confusion and Logan was at a complete loss of what to say.

Patton however was not, “Hello, I’m your conscience. I tell you all the good you should do, and remind you of all the good emotions you feel.”

Logan stared at Patton in alarm. Patton was a terrible liar, anyone who knew him well enough, knew that.

And the situation was precarious enough.

“Uh, okay,” Thomas told him nervously, down the hall, Virgil felt the pulling sensation again. But there was something in him that was fighting it.

“Do you remember anything?” Logan cut in, he still felt like his usual self so if he was a thrall, it was no different from how he usually conducted himself.

“No, should I?” Thomas asked, feeling anxious.

“Well Thomas, we didn’t want to rush you but you’ve been kinda having amnesia lately,” Joan lied.

Logan panicked, knowing how unsustainable the situation was, “Stop. Stop.”

Joan, Patton, and Thomas all looked at him. “We cannot start all this with lies when the instant he steps outside he’s going to figure out we deceived him.”

“What’s going on?” Thomas asked as Logan rubbed at his eyes.

“You’ve been dead for almost twenty years,” Logan admitted, adjusting his glasses. “Truthfully no one can say if you even are the original Thomas or a projection based on aura.”

Thomas stared at him in horror and alarm, “What?”

“Lo, maybe we should do this delicately?” Patton urged.

Logan looked around and saw the broken camera that had been the source of so much trouble lying on the ground and held it up for Thomas to see. “You were killed over twenty years ago and were split into multiple parts. Morality and I are two of those parts.”

“Wait, I am so confused, I don’t remember anything, I was at some party before,” Thomas’s voice was starting to pitch towards hysterics.

“Yes, we only recently discovered there was anything left in the camera and you came out,” Logan explained.

Thomas felt his heart beat faster and the sensation of needing to run away as fast and far as possible. And finally the tugging sensation inside of Virgil overcame whatever was keeping him clinging onto Roman in pure terror. He was ripped away from Roman’s arm and came to stand directly behind Thomas. Thomas immediately sensed there was something behind him and turned.

Virgil looked over at Thomas and the two of them startled before they screamed at the same time.

Thomas threw himself off the couch to get away from Virgil, and the anxious Side ducked behind Patton and Logan, nervously looking around him at Thomas, his hood tugged deep over his eyes.

“Uh, hi,” Thomas greeted nervously from the floor.

Virgil, surprising even himself, hissed at Thomas like an angry cat. His eyeshadow darkening, pupils little more than needle-thin slits.

Thomas leaned away in alarm, Joan rushing over to him. Roman rushed out of his hiding place when he heard the hissing but calmed down when he saw that Virgil was hiding behind the other two Sides.

“He’s not that keen on new people,” Joan apologized, helping Thomas up. “He just about hit me in the face when we met.”

Not offering an immediate comment, Thomas watched Virgil cautiously. Logan broke the tension by stepping in the middle.

“He’ll calm down a bit if you keep your distance,” Logan promised and Thomas nodded, looking around and seeing Roman standing down the hall. “Is the color theme normal?”

“Yes,” Logan answered. “Princey, you are doing no favors by loitering in the halls.”

“I do nothing of the sort,” Roman huffed out, strolling over. “I was merely waiting to make my grand entrance, which you so rudely spoiled.”

Logan rolled his eyes, “This is Princey, the one in purple here is Anxiety.”

“Anxiety,” Thomas repeated tensely and Virgil hid even further into Patton’s back.

“Yes, he wanted to be a little overdramatic with his name,” Logan answered. “But if you don’t harm him, he’ll leave you alone.”

“Okay, but I never did get an answer on where I am,” Thomas reminded.

“You are in the Coalition of Heroes’ base,” Logan answered. “We store all types of magical artifacts here. Some heroes live here, others like us only come in and out for patrols.”

“Heroes?” Thomas repeated.

“We’re superheroes,” Roman waved his arms and red sparks of magic spread across the air.

Thomas gasped in excitement, “Like Spiderman?”

“If that helps you internalize the idea,” Logan sighed.

“We all have superpowers,” Patton smiled.

“Cept[1] for Lo over here, he’s just a nerd,” Roman joked, jabbing finger at Logan.

“I happen to be a very crucial part of this team,” Logan huffed. The more jovial atmosphere helped calm Thomas down, which in turn was calming Virgil down. “I helped redesign all of our suits.”

With the mere idea that superheroes were real that got Patton and Roman to start recounting some of their wilder stories. Thomas was clearly excited and Virgil was starting to unglue himself from Patton’s back.

The situation was starting to de-escalate. Logan dared to get hopeful. But he wasn’t going to just accept that Thomas couldn’t turn them into his thralls. Logan needed to bridge the gap first. Consciousness wasn’t enough to thrall them. Proximity wasn’t enough. Even the knowledge of what they all were didn’t do it.

But would tactile contact—

“Come here!” Patton cheered and threw out his arms before he tackled Thomas with a hug, alarming everyone in the room except for Thomas.

“Oh, we’re, uh,” Thomas stammered in surprise but accepted the hug.

Everyone in the room stayed braced but Patton pulled away and smiled.

“See, a hug always makes things better,” Patton gave Thomas a huge smile. Both his and Thomas’s eyes were a sky, baby blue color.

“Yeah,” Thomas echoed his smile as his eyes slowly bleed back into his normal brown. “It does.”

“We should go home,” Patton suggested warmly as his eyes were slower to fade back to brown. “Been a long day, I’m hungry.”

“What do you want?” Logan tried to remain calm, trying to see if there was anything different about Patton.

“Cake!” Patton cheered, and Logan couldn’t help but smile.

“Nonsense, you will eat something of substance,” Logan told him and Patton pouted, making Logan roll his eyes and give a relenting huff. “If you eat a full, nutritious meal, then you may have cake.”

“Yay!” Patton threw his hands up.

Logan brought all of them into the little kitchen area. Distracting Thomas and the other Sides as Joan went to talk to Nate and orchestrate a way to empty the room to feed people back in bit by not.

Thomas was, at first, nervous with meeting new people. King kept his distance, and Mare didn’t even make himself visible. The young hero refused to get closer than halfway across the room. Eventually Thomas warmed up to people, irregardless of whether King’s presence made him wary.

Logan chalked it up to the presence of food and brightly colored costumes. The newcomer was enamored by the idea of being a superhero and if it kept Thomas close enough for them to watch for any hint of violence or thralling the Sides, then no one was going to fight it.

When it came time to turn in for the night, the Sides quietly decided to stay close to Thomas in case anything happened. Roman, Virgil, and especially Patton we’re so exhausted they fell right asleep.

However, Logan wasn’t so fortunate. He found himself unable to sleep. But he wasn’t tired, the farthest thing from it, in fact. He was wide awake. As if he had slept a full eight hours and was ready to restart his day.

Logan lay in bed and tried to get to sleep. But as the night passed, he found sleep was impossible, but unlike every other time he was not exhausted and fatigued come morning.

In fact as he watched Virgil check his phone, the anxious Side pressed up against him as the others were getting out of bed, Logan found he still felt rested.

And he worried if Thomas’s re-emergence had anything to do with it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Accessibility Translations:

1. Except