#mom let's play monopoly

[seikaisinthevoid]

HECK YEAH WOMAN MONOPOLY! This is actually extremely dumb, but hey it's monopoly!!

[x]

[megamindsecretlair]

Give Me Everything

Pairing: Husband!Terry Richmond x Wife!Black!Fem!/ Plus Size reader

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, You are in charge of your own reading experience. Intentional use of AAVE. FLUFF, cursing, teasing, PIV, oral (male receiving), fingering (fem receiving), dirty talk, use of the n-word, all consensual. Sorry if I missed some.

Summary: Thanksgiving Day was always a hustle and bustle of activity and noise, two things you don’t usually like even coming from a big family. While you flitted around checking in on everyone, you couldn’t help feeling a little selfish. After sending Terry a sexy picture while he was seated next to your father, you sneak off to your childhood bedroom to fulfill a little fantasy of yours.

Word Count: 5,518k

AO3 Link

A/N: Ya'll thought I was gonna let the holiday pass without a little treat? I lost the drabble challenge, but well, can't fight my brain no matter how hard I try. Happy Thanksgiving, happy bank holiday, or however you celebrate, many love and blessings to the greatest group of people ever. Toss a coin to your blogger by leaving a comment, gif, or unhinged ask.

The rich smells of Thanksgiving food permeated the air and tickled your nostrils. You inhaled deeply as you flitted around the kitchen helping out the Aunties. No one messed with the Aunties on Thanksgiving.

You didn’t know how they managed to stay organized among the chaos. Between one of their husbands who constantly entered the kitchen asking when the food would be done and the little kids running throughout the house, it was a miracle they weren’t yelling and cursing up a storm.

“Fix me my medicine, baby,” Auntie Gee told you.

“Yes, ma’am,” you said. You pivoted away from helping Auntie Aileen with the yams and went over to the small pantry, grabbing supplies. You made a quick and dirty margarita for Auntie Gee and placed it in a glass. You already started in on another one because in one, two, three…

“I want one!” Auntie Mimi called out. You smiled to yourself, knowing your Aunties a little too well. Maybe you spent too much time around them all. But you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Your big family was a handful at times. But at the end of the day, it was nothing but good vibes and great conversation. The Aunties were currently going on about their favorite man, Denzel Washington.

“That man been fine his whole goddamn life!” Auntie Hope called from the round kitchen table. She cleaned the greens, taking the stems off and putting them into a red bowl, to be soaked in the kitchen sink a little later. Right now, your mom was at the farmhouse sink peeling potatoes. 

“Language, young lady!” Your grandmother, Grammy Alice, called out from the stove. She babysat the white sauce for the mac and cheese, carefully adding cheese and stirring to get the mixture right. 

“Sorry, momma,” Auntie Hope said. She grinned at you and winked. 

You giggled and handed Auntie Mimi her drink. “Thank you baby. You better get outta here before they snatch you to do something else,” she whispered.

And that’s why she was lowkey your favorite Auntie. You hugged and thanked her and then quietly slipped out while the Aunties discussed Denzel’s career. They categorically denounced Training Day as his best role. He was just playing a nigga, that’s all. They were stuck between John Q and Glory.

You left the spacious kitchen in a flash, disappearing around the corner and fell into the background as you soaked everything in. The well-decorated living room held most of the men yelling and screaming at the football game playing on the TV. They sat on the blue couch, lounge chairs, and picnic chairs all crowded around the large screen TV. You didn’t know a lick about the game, but by the sound of it, their team was making stupid ass decisions. 

Kids played Monopoly on the floor, a mix of little kids and the quieter teens who didn’t want to play with the older, rowdier teens outside. You carefully picked your way through the living room, stopping to place a kiss on your Dad’s withered cheek. You patted his shoulder and he brought his hand up to pat yours.

“Everything alright?” He asked.

“Yes, sir. Food coming along,” you said.

He groaned aloud with the Uncles and boyfriends, everyone throwing up their hands and calling the ref out of his name.

“They need to get that blind mu’fucka off the field!” Uncle Cornell said. He was the only one semi-dressed up in a pair of slacks and a button up shirt. You didn’t know where Auntie Mimi found this character. 

Your dad chuckled, returning his attention to you. “Good, good. I’ma just sit here until your mom says it’s time,” your dad said with a secret grin. He made the mistake of entering the kitchen early one year, reaching for a piece of the ham and receiving a swift spoon to the back of the hand from Grammy Alice. He still had a little scar from how hard she popped him. 

“Probably for the best,” you said with a giggle. 

You left the living room, trekking through the raucous house in search for a little bit of peace. As much as you loved how big your family was, you were decidedly the opposite sometimes. You didn’t draw strength from being around so many people. You craved the quiet and silence that came with being by your lonesome. Probably a consequence of being an only child.

Perhaps that was one of the main things that drew you to your husband, Terry. He was the opposite to your family as well. Calm under pressure, quiet and unassuming despite his size; he really was perfect for you. 

You found him on the wide back porch with your cousins, sitting around a table playing dominoes. The teens and older cousins chased each other around the yard playing some game they made up years ago. You never understood the rules and your ass was too tired to continue chasing them around.

Some of the girl cousins watched their younger, baby siblings as they talked about whatever it was kids were into these days. Full. Your life was full to bursting and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

You approached Terry and pecked his cheek. “Hey baby,” Terry said, lowering his dominoes to the table. He turned to you and wrapped his arm around your waist from his seated position. 

“Just checking on you, is all,” you said. “You need anything?” 

Terry used his free hand to lift his half empty beer bottle. “Naw, I should be good for a minute. You need anything?” 

“She needs to leave the table so I can get back to whoopin’ yo ass, Marine boy!” Your cousin, Emery, yelled as he slammed down a domino. “Go on and put that thirty-five down for your boy!” He snickered as the game keeper, Darell, laughed and marked down Emery’s points. 

Terry chuckled and shook his head. He peeked over at the scorecard on the notebook by Darell’s elbow. “Maybe you need to go back to math class. I’m still winning,” Terry said. 

A chorus of oooh’s and damn’s and “You gon’ let him talk to you like that, playboy?” rung around the wooden table. Emery waved them all off, a small smile on his face. 

“Alright, alright. Game ain’t over. Why don’t you go on? You killing the mood, girl,” Emery said. 

“I’m killing the mood? Just like a hatin’ nigga to focus on somebody else while he losing,” you said.

“Damn!” Cousin Craig yelled out, his long skinny face cracking into a harsh, wheezing laugh that only triggered everybody else to start laughing. 

You kissed Terry on the cheek once more, admiring the clean beard on his face. He looked good enough to eat himself. He wore a simple powder blue sweater with the sleeves rolled up and a pair of jeans that really showcased his sexy ass. Just looking at him caused your stomach to do little belly flips.

Terry squeezed your side and smirked up at you as if he saw the direction of your nasty thoughts. He winked at you and you bid your farewell to the men and their little game. 

The majority of the day passed too quickly as you went from group to group, checking in on everyone. The domino game ended and the cousins joined the Uncles in the living room to check on the remainder of the game.

“Girl, don’t you ever sit down?” Your cousin, Robyn, asked. She was in your age group, relaxing with the other girl cousins who laid across multiple blankets, sipping their drinks of choice, and chilling out. 

You chuckled. “Girl no. Between your momma and mine, I keep getting called to do something. And I feel like if I sit down, I’ma pass out,” you said, shaking your head. 

Robyn and Ronda were twins of Auntie Aileen’s and they both shivered at the mention of their mother. “Please, don’t summon her,” Ronda said, shaking her head. “That lady trynna get me set up with her co-worker.” She stuck out her tongue and gagged.

“Not toxic enough for you?” Auntie Hope’s daughter, Stacie, asked.

“Hell no! That girl likes…theater,” Ronda said, making the word sound dirty. You laughed with your cousins, shaking your head at her. Ronda had the worst luck with women. Last year, one threatened to throw herself into traffic if Ronda didn’t come outside to talk to her. 

You and your cousins merely stared at her through the screen door and dared her to do it. You didn’t really mean it, but the girl was dramatic as hell and too full of herself to actually go through with it. 

“Dare I go check in on the Aunties?” You asked.

There was a resounding, “No!”, that seemed to echo even while outside. You laughed with your cousins. You were feeling restless, though. Anxious. You needed something but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it. 

Maybe it was just the holiday. You took after your mother in the sense that you had a strong need to make sure everybody was okay. Everybody had all their toes and fingers accounted for, no bruises, no yelling, or fighting. If everybody else was okay, then all was right in the world with you. 

But sometimes…you got a little impish. Like you wanted to cause trouble just to see what would happen. You wanted to disrupt the delicate balance of the house and festivities and do something wicked. 

An idea immediately came to mind and you didn’t think twice about it. You said goodbye to your cousins, stepping back into the house to check on your dad. Lately, he had been feeling more winded than usual. More tired. You urged him to go to the doctor, but the relationship between men and hospitals needed to be studied. He avoided it like it was a nail in a coffin. 

Terry sat next to your dad, yelling at the TV with him. He brought his beer to his lush lips and took a deep pull. Your core instantly heated looking at your man. There was precious little he did that didn’t absolutely turn you on. 

He caught you staring and winked at you. You grinned and took out your phone, snapping a quick picture of him. He tilted his head, giving you a look. You stuck your tongue out at him and then checked the score. You found a free recliner opposite your dad and sat down, finally taking the load off.

While everyone was distracted, you quickly sent Terry a text. He checked his smart watch and then glanced at you, furrowing his eyebrows in an unspoken question. You smiled sweetly at him while he dug out his phone and checked your message.

💬 You sent a photo.

“Can Big Daddy come play?”

Terry immediately placed his phone down on his thigh, turning wide eyes towards you. You rocked in the recliner, grinning at him. You had sent a thirst trap to him, one you snapped in the bathroom earlier in the day. You had meant to show him at a later time, maybe while he was at work and needed a pick me up. 

He scooted forward on the couch, leaning his elbows on his knees. He rubbed his beard and tried to suppress a grin, subtly shaking his head at you. 

You continued to rock, feeling pleased as punch. You tried to see if he was getting hard but he was bent too much forward. The men groaned at the latest ref’s call and you turned to the TV to see the teams setting up for another play. 

You glanced back at Terry who kept his eyes trained on you. When you caught his eye, he narrowed them slightly and then jerked his head towards the stairs. You grinned and got up first, heading up to the second floor that remained off limits to everybody. Less rooms to clean up afterwards. 

The great thing about having a big family was that it was easy to disappear with no one the wiser. You headed upstairs to your childhood bedroom, closing the door behind you. The room was just as you left it in your early twenties when you finally moved out. There was still stuffed animals and an overflowing bookshelf in the corner, a wide dresser stretched underneath your TV, and “grown-up” art on the walls. You sometimes missed the B2K and B5 posters had tacked to your wall for years. 

Anticipation churned in your stomach as you waited for Terry’s quiet footfalls to follow behind you on the shaggy, brown carpet. A moment later, there was a soft knock and then Terry entered, looking behind the door for you. You ushered him in and then closed and locked the door, wrapping your hands around his neck.

He had to bend down slightly so that it wasn’t incredibly awkward for you and he groaned. “You trynna get me killed?” He demanded, stepping back to look you in the face.

You giggled and clasped your hands behind your back. “Whatever do you mean?” You asked. 

Terry smirked and advanced on you, causing you to bite your lip and retreat. He crossed the distance in one second, his long legs carrying him forward. He cupped your neck in both of his warm, strong hands and you moaned, eyes sinking lower now that you were back in his capable hands. 

“You think you slick sendin’ that picture while I was right next to your dad?” He asked.

You giggled again. Ugh, you couldn’t help it. He made you feel so feminine and girly whenever he went all big and strong on you. You were working on being more bold, opening your mouth and asking for what you wanted. But sometimes, you got so twisted up with nerves your mouth didn’t work. 

“Did you like it?” You asked. 

Terry squeezed your neck and you sighed at the pressure. Perfect. Absolutely perfect. “You know I liked it,” he said, glancing down at the front of his pants. You followed his gaze and noticed his dick pressed against the fabric of his jeans. You reached out to rub his bulge. 

He lifted an eyebrow at you. “What’s gotten into you?” He asked.

“I can’t just want my man?” You asked. You continued to rub him, watching as his own eyes drooped. His naturally dark eyelashes nearly fanned his high cheekbones. 

“You know, there is one fantasy I always wanted to act out,” you said, forcing yourself to say the words. Even after years of marriage, Terry made you feel like a school girl with a crush. Guess you could never really shake that bit of shyness from growing up in a loud household and seeking only peace. 

“Is that right,” he murmured. 

“Mhmm. I never really got to have boys in my room growing up,” you said. You blinked up at him with a smile hovering over your lips. Terry lightly squeezed your neck, stepping closer, as you continued to rub him through his jeans. His breathing increased, soft pitfalls loud in your ear because he was so close to you. 

“Am I the first boy in your room?” He asked. 

“Maybe. But don’t get a big head about it,” you said. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said. His thumbs rubbed across your pulse points on both sides of your neck, turning you stupid in less than a second. You lost your train of thought as the rough slide of his fingers sent electric zings down to the tips of your toes. Your panties grew damp as you sighed. 

You kept waiting for the honeymoon phase to be over, but after a while, you just accepted that you two were just that intense for each other. Growing up, you saw your grandparents, parents, and extended family all find the love of their lives, each carving out a special relationship with their significant others. 

But it was Auntie Aileen’s marriage that you admired. Sometimes she and her husband seemed to communicate with just a look. Like they were the only two people in the world and everything else was background noise. You wanted and craved that. And by some miracle, you found that with Mr. Terry Richmond. 

“And, there’s a few things that I always wanted to do with a boy in my room if I ever got the chance,” you said. Your hands slipped to his jeans, unbuttoning them and then sliding the zipper down. 

“Mm, I think I like where this is going. You know, I had a similar fantasy,” he said. He smirked as you lowered his jeans enough to get to his boxer briefs. His dick was hot to the touch through the fabric, balls heavy, and you slipped your hand beneath the waistband to get to your prize. 

“Is that so?” You asked, palming his dick. He hissed and then released the sigh in a shudder. You grinned, feeling like the most powerful person ever. Just you gripping him caused a reaction. It was heady and intoxicating and you would never get sick of it. 

“Mhm. See, I always wanted to fuck my wife in her childhood home. Like it was a badge of honor or somethin’,” he said, his voice getting deeper and rougher. 

You shivered. Your panties were practically soaked now. Your pussy throbbed at the thought of you both having similar fantasies. You stepped back from his hands around your neck and then dropped down your knees. 

Terry’s eyebrows lifted as you grinned at him. You pressed your nose into his crotch and nuzzled. Terry sighed, petting your head as you tugged his briefs down to expose the long, thick length of him. 

The tip of his dick swelled, pre-cum already beading. You swiped your tongue out and licked it causing Terry to jerk his hips forward. “As much as I love this, we better hurry before one of the Aunties come looking for you,” he said.

You pouted. He was right. A bunch of girls to choose from to handle anything around the house and somehow it always fell to you. 

You sighed and kissed his dick, making it jump. “Don’t worry, buddy, I’ll make it up to you later,” you said.

Terry laughed and pleasure zinged through you. You loved pleasing your man. Whether it was making him laugh, checking in on him, or pleasing him during sex, you loved it when you could just make him feel good. 

Terry helped guide his dick into your mouth and you looked up at him while you worked in tandem. He pushed in and you sunk onto his dick, wrapping your lips around him. His hairs tickled your face but you kept your mind focused on making him cum as quickly as possible. 

Little did he know, you were in a competition with yourself to make him bust faster and faster. Maybe it was simply the competitive spirit in you. But you swore you’ve come from just a look from him. Turnabout was only fair play. 

Light from your window illuminated Terry through the slats of the blinds. He tipped his head back, mouth falling open as you worked him over with your tongue and hands. You gripped his base, squeezing how he liked while you took the rest in your mouth.

“Fuuck, this mouth of yours,” he moaned. Your pussy throbbed harder, growing wet from the sounds of his moans, the look of pleasure on his face. His eyes were closed, hands around the back of your head to push your mouth further down. 

You took him in and bobbed your head, really getting into pleasing him. You shifted on your knees and squeezed his dick harder. You moaned around his length, getting lost in the feeling of him throbbing in your mouth. His dick poked your cheek and you teased the tip with your tongue.

“Just like that,” he coached so you did it again. You teased the tip while you sucked him off, loud gawking echoing in your ears. 

Saliva slipped from your mouth and drooped down your chin, letting him slip easier in and out. You increased your ministrations, bobbing in a frenzy, watching for any signs of his discomfort. 

You saw none of that. Instead, his face was twisted in a sexy mix of pleasure and pain. Soft moans escaped his mouth as you kept going, kept trying to take him deeper, kept trying to swallow him whole. 

“Fuckin’ perfect. So fuckin’ perfect with my dick in your mouth,” he cooed. 

You moaned, growing unbearably wet at his words. Your jaw started to ache but you ignored it in favor of wanting to get him off. Wanting him to bust in your mouth. You widened your jaw and he sunk in a little deeper.

He groaned and looked down at you. “I’m finna bust,” he whispered.

You grinned around his dick and kept up what you were doing until he gripped your head and spilled down your throat. His moans were their own aphrodisiac, filling you with pride that you got your man off so quickly. You swallowed his cum, something you were still getting used to, and then continued to suck. 

Terry huffed, hips jerking forward, as he couldn’t decide between laughing and moaning. He had to gently push at your head to make you stop and he eased his dick out. “You must think you’re cute,” he said.

You pinched your thumb and forefinger together. “A little,” you said. 

Terry chuckled, grabbing your hands and helping you stand. He kissed you, gripping your face to his to make you stay. You sighed with a moan, wrapping your arms around him. You made out for a good, long while, soaking up each other’s desperate kisses. 

“My turn,” he whispered against your lips. 

You only had a brief moment to catch the devious, nearly evil look in his eye as he lifted your plain gray T-shirt over your head. He didn’t take it off, instead he just wanted the collar over your head to expose your black, lacy bra. 

He groaned, getting a live view of the sexy picture you sent him earlier. He thumbed your nipples through the bra, making them bead up. He backed you towards your closet door, then dropped his head to suck on your nipples around your bra.

You moaned, gripping the back of his neck. “Oh fuck,” you moaned.

“Shhh. We ain’t trynna get caught ‘cause of your nasty ass,” he said.

“My nasty ass?” You asked with a giggle. 

“Your nasty, sexy, delicious ass, yes,” Terry said in between licking and kissing your titties. He used his index finger in between the cups to lower it, exposing your nipples to his gaze. He tucked the cups of your bra beneath your titties and went back to sucking on them. 

Each suckle sent a wave of heat through your body and if you weren’t careful, you’d turn into a raging inferno right there in your childhood bedroom. Your moans only increased, getting louder the more he worked that glorious, hot tongue on you. 

You wished you had enough time to get your pussy licked on. But you were already pushing the envelope at the moment with so many people just downstairs. Risk of discovery only turned you on more, your pussy clenching around nothing. 

Terry slipped his hand down your leggings and past your underwear, finding you soaked. He paused with your nipple in his mouth. “You got this wet from sucking me off?” He asked with his mouth full. 

You nodded. “Sure did,” you said.

Terry closed his eyes briefly and sighed. “Good to know,” he murmured. 

You didn’t have time to ask him about that because he went back to sucking on your titties while he plunged two fingers into your pussy. You cried out, and he gave you a warning look, before working those long, thick fingers in and out of you.

“I-I didn’t suck you off to get something back,” you whispered. As much as you would like to turn this into a full on session, you were also cognizant of the time. Surely, someone would come looking soon, right? You weren’t exactly subtle heading upstairs. 

“Think I’ma leave my favorite girl like this?” He asked. He emphasized his point by plunging his fingers faster, the squelching of your pussy smacked in the room. 

“Oh, baby. Oh, Terry, please, I’m gonna…unnf,” you moaned as quietly as you were able. 

“That’s okay, baby, you cum on these fingers. You cum all over this fingers f’me,” he murmured, still treating your titties like his favorite meal. He kissed, suckled, and nibbled until you turned into a puddle in his arms.

You were only held up by your hands around his neck and his arms around you. You shook violently, trapping his fingers between your thighs as you rode out your orgasm. Terry still managed to wiggle his fingers inside, rubbing against a sweet, sweet spot that made stars burst behind your eyelids. 

Your nails dug into his soft sweater and you shivered on your way down from it. Terry kissed and rubbed his beard against your nipples. Was the man trying to kill you? 

He leaned back and smiled at you. “I love the look you give me after you cum,” he said.

You giggled. “What look is that, sir?” You asked.

“Like a well-satiated woman. That’s always my goal,” he said.

You smiled and tilted your hand. “You better be careful talking to me like that. I might think you wanna marry me,” you said.

Terry chuckled. “Oh, I wanna do more than marry you,” he said. He grinned and then gripped the waistband of your leggings and panties. He slid the pants down your legs, his hand traveling behind to rub against your thighs. 

You stared at each other, smiles hovering on your faces, as he got them down to your calves. You stepped out of them and Terry wasted no time picking you up. You yelped as he spread you wide open, hooking your thighs around his waist.

Holding his hand under your ass, he used his other one to guide his dick into your slick heat. Your eyes widened at the glorious, burning stretch as you sank down onto him. Your toes curled as he sank in deeper and deeper, your essence making the trip easy. 

Terry maneuvered his arms under your knees, so that he could easily lift you up and down on his dick. You gripped onto him for dear life, turning wide, panicked eyes to him. You didn’t think he’d drop you, no, your husband was too strong and capable for that. You just felt like you were about to rip apart at the seams and he was the only thing keeping you together. 

“You did say you wanted Big Daddy to come and play, right?” He whispered, pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was slow, smooth, and so damn hot you clenched around his dick. He groaned and lifted you off his dick just to sink back in. 

“Don’t be using my words against me,” you said.

“Oh word?” He asked with a grin. All the niceties flew out of the window. He started slamming you up and down on his dick, that stretching burn making your eyes roll to the back of your head. 

“Oh, fuck,” you moaned, bringing your face closer to his. You wrapped your arms tighter around his neck and held on while he fucked you, stuffed you, and filled you so completely you felt him all over. He was in your heart, your mind, and your soul, writing his name in the threads of your being. 

“There’s my good girl. I’m so fuckin’ proud of you,” he said.

You whined against his face, peppering him with sloppy kisses. “I love you,” you said.

“I love you, too. I like when you get bold. Let me know you want this dick,” he said. He rubbed his beard against your cheek and you moaned.

“I want it. Please, I want it,” you whispered. 

Knocking drew your attention to your door. You turned wide eyes to Terry who stopped moving. He glanced towards the door. 

“Baby, you in there?” Your mom called out. Your heart beat in double time, fear turning your insides icy.

“What should I do?” You whispered. Okay, you lied, getting caught would suck ass right now. There was no way to explain this to your mom. You just didn’t talk about these things with her. As far as she was concerned, you were married but still a virgin.

“If you don’t answer, she gonna send a search party,” he whispered back.

“Yeah, mom?” You called out. 

“What are you doing in there? Food’s getting ready to be done so I need your help organizing the line,” she said.

“Yes, mommy, I-I wasn’t feeling well so I came to lay down,” you called out. 

“Do you need some medicine? You want me to grab Terry?” She asked. 

Terry grinned and started moving you up and down on his dick again. Your jaw dropped, tummy fluctuating between arousal and fear. The normal butterflies in your stomach were having a field day. 

You slapped at his shoulder to get him to stop. Or quit fucking around. He couldn’t think this was a great idea, making you take his dick like this while talking to your mom. He grinned innocently, moving his lips down back to your nipples to suck.

You closed your eyes, not knowing where to focus your attention. “Uh-no! I’m okay! I’ll be out soon, promise!” Oh, fuck, he hit a good spot inside you and you clutched him to you.

“Alright, better come on. Your Uncle Remy ‘bout to work my damn nerves,” your mother sniffed as she presumably went on down the hallway. 

You gasped and tapped Terry’s shoulder again. Terry answered you with a chuckle and then ended on a moan. 

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he moaned like it was a glorious revelation. His deep voice skated along your nerve endings, making your tummy flip with desire. 

“Terry, please!” You moaned.

“Big Daddy ain’t finished yet,” he said and nuzzled your neck. He placed kisses there while he pumped his arms, moving you up and down on his dick. Your toes curled once more, fast approaching that train to nirvana. 

“Oh, please, Big Daddy, I can’t take it,” you cried. 

“Sure you can. Cum on this dick so I can fill you up. Let me feel it,” he said into your neck. His groans joined yours, hips jerking into you like he was close as well. “Soak this dick, baby.”

You dropped your head to his shoulder and let the orgasm roll over you like a subway train. You twitched and jerked on him, keening whines and cries filling your room as you lost sound in your right eye. 

Or maybe this was that nirvana you were dreaming of. Maybe you slipped into another plane of existence where your souls danced and entwined for eternity. Either way, Terry’s groans brought you back to this side of existence while he stuffed you full of his cum.

The hot, thick spurts throbbed with his dick, sliding against your inner walls. You cried, feeling overwhelmed and thoroughly fucked out. You both panted and huffed as you came down, gathering your senses post-nut. 

You smiled dopily at your man and he flashed you a beautiful, wide grin. “There’s that look I love so much,” he said.

“You are dangerous,” you said.

He chuckled. “Saying I’m dangerous while your pussy feel this good squeezing my dick. Just say you don’t wanna let go,” he said.

You squeezed his dick and he laughed, lowering you carefully to the floor. Once he slipped out, his cum came rushing out of you and you closed your eyes to enjoy the sensation. Terry suddenly pushed his cum right back in.

“Terry!” You screamed. 

He chuckled. “I can’t help it. I like watching my cum slide out of you,” he said. He planted a kiss on your forehead and you smiled at him while you crossed the room to your dresser. Sometimes, you came to spend the night with your parents to help keep an eye on your dad while your mom got a break.

You grabbed an extra pair of panties and a towel from off of your bed. You cleaned yourself up as best as you were able and then slipped your leggings back on. Thank goodness that a bathroom was directly across from your room. You wouldn’t have to trek far to get fully cleaned up. 

Terry stuffed that dangerous monster back into his jeans. You stood, transfixed, watching him slide the denim over his dick and zip up his pants with a little hop. 

“Happy Thanksgiving, Big Daddy,” you said, admiring your man.

“Happy Thanksgiving, baby,” he said, pulling you into a hug and one final kiss before leaving your room in a cloud of marital bliss.

The end.

I love you all and I'm so thankful for you. The Secret Terry Richmond Files

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@thegreatlibraryofalex @amyhennessyhouse @hihellogoodbyebruh @becauseimswagman1

[zhelin-thames]

Constantine is a father?? #2

@magical-awesome-kid, @bianca-hooks123 thank you for the idea

Danny: "Okay, so let me get this straight—AGAIN. I’m one-third Maddie, one-third Jack, and one-third you, Constantine?” Constantine: “Oi, it’s not that weird, is it? Magic’s a bloody wild thing.” Danny: “No, what’s weird is you. My mom’s a ghost-hunting genius, my dad’s a walking disaster, and somehow you—magic’s equivalent of a cursed feral cat—got thrown into the DNA blender and hit purée?” Constantine: “You’re welcome, by the way. The charm didn’t skip a generation, clearly.” Danny: “Charm doesn’t help when ghosts are trying to eat me weekly, Dad Two.”

(Later, facing Vlad Plasmius...)

Danny: “You’re really hung up on this, huh? I mean, you’re not even dad two, and you’re acting like you just lost a custody battle.” Vlad: “Excuse me?! Maddie and Jack are monogamous! This is lies—no, magical interference! Or—or some kind of—” Danny: “Oh, this is rich. My mom’s polyamorous, dude. And she STILL wouldn’t sleep with you!” Vlad: sputtering incoherently, attempting to find a rebuttal while visibly spiraling

(Flashback: Vlad digging through his files... The one labeled "John Constantine.")

Vlad: mutters “Constantine, Constantine… What threat level? Ah, here it is. Mostly complaints about his soul being divided into thirds… no, quarters? Is he playing magical Monopoly with his afterlife? Ridiculous!” Pauses and looks at another note: “Wait, Maddie slept with this man?!” Further reading shows a footnote: ‘Note: Constantine’s file also includes a restraining order issued by Hell.’ Vlad: face-palms in frustration. “How... How do I even process this information?!”

Danny: “You know, Vlad, I think my existence is proof that my parents are full of surprises. You’ve got an obsession with Maddie, and she didn’t even blink before dating younger magical trash. That’s gotta sting.” Constantine (offhand): “’Younger’? Now that’s flattering.” Danny: grinning “Don’t push your luck, Dad Two.”

[whackk-kermitt]

We Weren't Together

Warning: Pack Mom Stiles(mostly Off screen), Derek is the Alpha, Everyone is Alive, Derek is Jelly, Mild Angst, Misunderstandings, Significant Background Character, Lydia is the best Meddler, Happy Ending Summary: Derek and Stiles are not a couple. Simple as that. Not really sure where I was going with this one. It might be total shit. Womp Womp. NOT PROOFREAD

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"Cheater!"

"I didn't cheat!"

"You so did! How else would you have all that money when you own two properties!" Erica flung a shoe. All Stiles could do was laugh until his ribs ached.

"Okay," Lydia sighed setting her cards down and backing from the coffee table to lean against the arm of the couch. Allison looked on unimpressed, but only because she knew Stiles cheated.

"Oh come on," Scott groaned. "This is why I never play Monopoly."

"Who's Idea was this?" Isaac threw his cards down and looked around, a scowl due for the culprit.

"Yours." Lydia supplied with an unimpressed expression and a tilt of the head.

Derek sat back with a privet smile. It had been a while since he had gotten to work bringing the old Hale house back to a livable condition. And once the majority of it was done, the pack, without being asked, began coming over every Saturday to spend time all together. He'd see individuals pop in throughout the week, but he loved when they'd all be here together.

"No," Isaac defended. "I said we have, Clue, Uno, Scategories, and Monopoly. I never said I wanted to play this one."

"The way you said 'and Monopoly', made it sound like you did." Stiles offered with a look in his eye Derek couldn't place. "And who could say no to that adorable ridiculous scarf." He teased with kissy lips and a pinch to Isaac's cheek. Isaac swatted his hand away but his cheeks went red.

"If nobody wants to play I'd rather not waste my time." Boyd piped up, the first thing he's said since he reluctantly agreed to play this.

"Okay, we wanna do a different game or a movie?" Stiles offered starting to clean up the pieces into the box.

"Movie!" Erica cheered. "Who's turn is it to pick?"

Derek, who was already up and walking into the kitchen, stopped and checked the calendar on the wall. It was a calendar bought from the vet clinic with different dogs for every month, posing in costumes related to that month's holiday. You can guess who bought it.

Thinking of a name that rhymes with Biles Bilinski.

Who took the commitment to go through the calendar and alternate the pack's names on every Saturday, to mark their turn to choose. Since nobody could ever agree.

"Erica." Derek grinned with his back to the living room while Erica and Lydia cheered, while most of the boys groaned. Whenever it was either of them, they teamed up to find a movie literally only girls would like- according to Jackson. They've been made to watch The Notebook five times, The Princess Bride three times, and 10 Things I Hate About You four times.

Derek leaving the girls behind to settle on what to torture the boys with, he pulled bowls from the cabanit and a pot. Oiling the bottom of the pot, pour in corn kernels to coat the bottom. He covered the pot and let it heat up, turning to get butter from the fridge. But a hand was already on the fridge pulling it open.

Stiles always had a smile on his face when he was at the house, just as happy to be here with everyone as Derek was. Derek watched as Stiles took out the butter opened two sticks into a bowl from the dish rack and plopped it in the microwave. While the corn began popping Stiles and Derek danced around each other in the kitchen, working in perfect synchronicity to stock the large tray with canned drinks, bottles of water, and other various snacks.

Derek eyes all the sugary garbage on the try without making a sound. He had a sweet tooth sure, but he preferred actual baked goods, not the overly processed Debbie cakes and Oreo cookies they kept in the snack cabinet. Just as he was about to settle for just popcorn and water Stiles's hand came into view as he wordlessly put a bag of homemade cookies on the tray. Sharpie scrawled out 'sourwolf' with a smiley face on it.

Derek said nothing, watching Stiles turn and ready the three big bowls for the popcorn to be sorted into. Things like this made Derek feel like a very lucky man. Stiles never even thought about it, just did things like this. Not only for Derek but for the rest of the pack as well. Always taking one extra step to make sure everyone was happy.

Derek knew when Stiles was overthinking things; his nose would scrunch up, sometimes just the slightest bit, and he'd fidget a little more than usual. Derek knew what Stiles had to think before he did something, he never stopped to think about this stuff.

Stiles was a good friend, and Derek was happy he was pack.

After getting the popcorn buttered and evenly distributed they scooped everything up and brought it to the living room. Everyone was finding their seats on the two couches and the armchair, with a movie called Clueless qued up on Netflix.

Derek set the tray down, grabbed a water bottle and his cookies, and found his stop on the end of the couch he always takes. Stiles passed out the bowls of popcorn and settled in. Derek had gotten distracted watching Scott and Isaac fuss over who gets the last can of coke. He snorted dryly and turned to look at Stiles, who always and something to say about their childlike bickering.

Except when he turned to his left, it was the body that sat next to him. Boyd wasn't even paying attention to him. Huh, odd.

Derek looked over to the other couch where Stiles was squished in between Lydia and Erica who were explaining all the reasons Stiles was gonna love this movie. Stiles was smiling at the girls and chuckling, amused at how excited Erica was.

He was confused for a moment about why he assumed it would be Stiles sitting next to him. It didn't matter though, Stiles can sit anywhere, it's not like it matters.

He thought about it while everyone quieted down and the movie started.

Derek thought about all the previous times they settled in for movie night, and from what Derek recalled, Stiles sat by him every time. Derek thought about it for a moment and found himself amused.

If he told Stiles about it he knew what Stiles would say. Something about Pavlov, and Derek subconsciously thinking Stiles would always be next to him when they watched a movie because up until now he was.

But it didn't really matter where anyone sat, Derek convinced himself. He is just as happy sitting next to Boyd as he would be next to Stiles, or anyone else for that matter.

But as the movie went on, and Erica and Lydia both started leaning more onto Stiles, laughing at the funny parts and basically snuggling together, Derek decided he didn't like it.

Something in him became unsettled when by the second half of the movie Stiles started dozing off like he did almost every movie night, his head laying on Lydia's shoulder.

If Stiles were sitting over here, his head would fall onto Derek's shoulder like it always did. Stiles would wake up after the movie was over, everyone going home, and say something along the lines of 'good flick'. To which Derek would tease him for sleeping through most of it and use the drool on his shirt as evidence.

Derek didn't have a word to describe the feeling, didn't have the slightest clue as to what caused it, because it really didn't matter. The pack is pack, he was happy to see Stiles and everyone getting along so well, being so close, but it still bugged him.

After the movie was over, everyone did their share of cleaning up, said goodnight, and was out the door. Erica and Boyd being the last to go, as soon as the door was closed and locked, Derek sighed and his smile fell. This pit in his stomach only twisted more, when Stiles only gave him a one-word goodbye and offered Lydia a ride him.

"So," Isaac awkwardly swayed a little as Derek entered the kitchen. "Are you and Stiles fighting?"

"What?" Derek paused his stride through the room to stare at him.

"Well, tonight you guys," He studdered for a bit, the awkwardness he was feeling just asking very prevalent on his face. "Seemed off tonight. I don't know."

"No," Derek shook his head. "We're fine."

"Okay," Isaac clearly didn't believe him and bound up the stairs to his room.

Derek stood there for a moment and shook it off. He stuffed the feeling down like he did with almost anything unpleasant and went to bed.

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It was 11:43 pm. It was slightly rainy and cold out. Stars and the moon shone over the preserve, eliminating the front yard.

Derek stood in the kitchen leaning against the counter, watching out the window at the driveway. Sparing a glance at the clock every few minutes.

Isaac was late. Super late. Not answering his phone, not sending a single text.

He was about to give up waiting for something, anything when a familiar jeep rolled up the long dirt road and onto the gravel driveway.

"Man," He heard Isaac's faint voice from outside. "He's still up. I'm in deep shit."

Isaac followed with dragging feet as a very amused Stiles him and Scott up the front steps.

When they entered they kicked off their shoes and joined a very disappointed-looking Derek. He stood tall with his arms crossed over his chest. The three gathered in front of him awaiting hell to rain down, except Derek didn't fail to notice the subtle grin on Stile's face.

"You're late."

"Sorry, we lost track of time." Isaac pouted like a picked puppy.

"You have a phone."

"It died." He shrugged.

"Neither of you have phones?" Derek glared at the other two.

The three looked between themselves and gave each other the "why didn't we think of that" look.

Derek sighed pitifully, "If I ask you to be home by a reasonable hour I don't think that's too much to ask. Full moons right around the corner and-" He groaned pinching the bridge of his nose. "Don't worry me like this again, " He waved the topic away.

Issac nodded shamefully and muttered an apology. The fear of being reprimanded stayed firm in his eyes and stiff body. It almost made Derek feel guilty for being upset in the first place, but he knew he had every right to worry.

"It's fine." Derek shook his head. "I just need to know where you are or at least be able to get in touch with you if something happens. I was worried Isaac, I'm not mad."

Isaac nodded, taking a breath and relaxing his shoulders.

"How was the party?" Derek didn't care really, he just wanted Isaac to feel comfortable.

"Fun, the whole team was there. We got bored when everyone else was too drunk to even talk to so we bailed and got some food and Mami's Diner." Scott smiles recalling the evening.

"Yeah, parties aren't as fun when you can't get tipsy with everyone else."

"Too bad for you guys." Stiles sighed with a goofy grin. They all took their spots at the breakfast bar.

"You didn't drink a drop tonight though." Isaac pointed out.

"And trust one of you to drive my baby?" Stiles accused as if the two were actively planning a first-degree murder in front of him. They all merely chuckled at his dramatics and moved on from that.

"Derek," Scott started with a grimace. "Can I stay the night? Moms working a double and I don't wanna wake her getting home this late."

Derek shrugged, indifferent. He'd gotten the guestrooms ready from the rest of the back. Hell, any of them could show up wanting to spend the night, with no excuse or reason, and he'd be happy to have them. It's why the rooms are there.

"Me too!" Stiles piped up. "I have no reason, just too lazy to drive I guess."

Derek chuckled a little and welcomed them both to a guest room of their choosing.

Isaac excused himself to the bathroom to shower, as Derek led Scott and Stiles up the stairs. He showed off the finished rooms and let them pick and choose. Stiles picked the one next to his room, claiming dibs because the other room had a draft.

"How much work left is there?" Stiles asked mindlessly looking down the hall at the section of the house still covered in plastic to protect the new wood flooring. Tools, wood varnishes, and cans of paint sat out in the hall.

Derek motioned him down the hall as Scott, uninterested, entered the room on the other end and settled in for bed.

Stiles followed Derek into an unfinished bedroom and took a look around. Derek flicked on the lights he'd just wired and put in the other day. The drywall was fresh and the whole room was covered in plastic, tape guarding the fixings and crown molding. The room was nearly ready to be painted and furnished.

"Just need to fix the wiring to the other room, mount the shelving, and this window," Derek strolled over and giggled the latch. "Needs to be fixed or replaced at some point. It won't open."

Stiles nodded looking around and smiling to himself.

"Other than that, it's just fixing up the back porch and the half-bath downstairs." He turned to look at Stiles. "What?"

"Nothing," Stiles shrugged, smile never fading. "I'm just happy."

"About what?" Derek asked curiously approaching Stiles like he was about to get a pie in the face.

"I don't know. Just in a good mood tonight, I guess."

When Derek was close enough he stopped, twisting his head and pouting at a smell invading his nose. Stiles almost made a kicked puppy joke until he saw that something was defiantly bothering Derek.

"What is it?"

"You smell weird."

"Well, I was just at a party with about sixty or seventy drunk teenagers, so."

"No, it's," Derek stepped closer slowly, leaning in just enough into Stiles's personal space to not make him uncomfortable but close enough to get a good whiff of the insulting aroma. "You smell like-" Derek stopped and his face dropped a little, leaning back and eyeing a very confused Stiles.

"Never mind." He shook his head and turned the lights off as he walked out. "Goodnight, Stiles." He left Stiles standing there completely bewildered.

Derek locked himself up in his room and changed into sweats before climbing into bed. All with a deep frown dragging his features down.

Stiles smelled like arousal. Like sex. But it clearly wasn't Stiles's scent.

Stiles smelled like someone else's arousal.

Derek racked his barian all night who that prick could've been. Why was that prick all riled up and close enough to rub his lasting odor on him? Was Stiles dancing with someone at the party? Did Stiles make out with someone at the party?

At that question, his mind supplied him the images of Stiles bumping and grinding with some random dude, hands on Stiles's hips, moving and swaying with him. The creep Kissing up on Stiles's neck and lips and offering to go somewhere private.

Derek turned onto his side and shoved his head in under the pillow, hiding from the thoughts as he let himself be taken by sleep.

But that night all he dreamed about was chasing some faceless vermin through the woods; hunting him like he was nothing more than a feral wild wolf, despite still being completely human in the dream.

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Danger came to Beacon Hills in the shape of Faeries.

Tiny winged spirits with a knack for trickery and mayhem. Derek wasn't sure how they ended up in Beacon Hills if they've just been migrating this way, or if someone let them loose. But people were getting hurt by their 'pranks' so they had to put a stop to it.

Tricking Faries was not an easy job in the slightest. But they managed it after a long night of chasing and fighting, finally trapping the three in silver cages and handing them over to Deaton; who swore he knew how to handle them and remove them from Beacon Hills safely.

The pack headed separate ways and most of them followed Derek back to the house. They arrived home just as the sun began to come up. Derek, still too anxious and worked up to sleep, went straight to work on the downstairs bathroom. He began preparing the grout to lay the tiles in place on the floor.

As he was checking the leveling of the pitch, he heard Stiles, "Need some help."

"Not really," Derek shrugged. It was a small bathroom, only enough room for one person to stand comfortably in between the sink and the toilet. Stiles sighed and started backing away.

Derek frowned and shook his head, not meaning to have come across as cold as he did.

"Actually, you can pass me tiles?" He offered, trying to brighten his tone. Stiles was plopped down just outside the doorway in a second. He smiled v\softly, almost unnoticeable, if it hadn't been for the fact that Derek noticed every detail about Stiles.

"You all grumpy with me for not staying behind like you said?"

"I'm not grumpy." He defended. Stiles gave him a look. "Yes." He sighed as if he was admitting to something as embarrassing as wetting the bed until you're fifteen.

Stiles chuckled, watching him work.

"You're not the only one that worries about everyone you know." Derek spared him a loot while reaching for a tile. "I know I'm human, der. You don't have to remind me that I don't heal, and I'm in more danger than most of you, but I still get this feeling that if I'm not there-"

Derek paused what he was doing to sit back and give Stiles his attention. Stiles started at him for a bit before continuing.

"I want to be there to look after you guys too. We've had close calls before, and nearly lost people. If I cared any less I'd listen to you when you tell me to stay back and out of the way, but I just have thing feeling that I need to be there in case something happens."

Derek gave him a sad smile. "And what if that something happens to you?"

Stiles frowned and lowered his head, shrugging. "If I can help, there's not really anything you can do to stop me from trying."

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "So I've learned."

Stiles chuckled and handed Derek another tile, smiling at him as he took the subtle hint the conversation had ended and turned back to laying the tiles in place. Stiles watched him intently, adoring the alpha.

"You got any plans tonight?" Stiles sighed when he was bored of the quiet.

"Back porch is fixed up, might get someone to help me put together the table, and cheers I ordered. Maybe fire up the grill?"

"That sounds fun." Stiles nodded, a look on his face like he was considering his options.

"You got a better idea?" Derek teased, because Stiles always had something to say about the activities Derek came up with.

"No, I just," He paused and thought to himself a moment. "I met this dude at the party the other night, and he texted me earlier asking if I'd be down to meet up later tonight."

Derek's heart sank a little. Oh, that prick.

"Oh," Derek nodded. He didn't wanna ask questions, he didn't wanna know. So Stiles just nodded.

"If it doesn't take too long I'll swing by after." Stiles delivered the empty promise with a grin. "Save some food for me."

Derek only nodded.

Stiles never showed.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Derek was in a bad mood.

Everyone in the house felt it and kept to their best behavior.

He didn't scowl or glare, he didn't yell or stomp around, he just kept his head down and mouth shut.

It was a Thursday night, and his betas had come over after the Lacross game like they always did. Boyd having joined the team, came along with the other players plus Erica, after every game. Although Jackson never showed, he only made an appearance when Lydia did.

Except tonight was different. Stiles hadn't come.

Apparently, Stiles was invited by the guy he met at the party to hang out after the game. A date.

He got all this from Erica who told him with a look of pity and confusion etched into her feature. Derek said nothing, just nodded, and went on making dinner for those who did show.

After eating they settled into the living room and watched a movie Derek wasn't paying attention to. He'd been on autopilot half the night, stuck in his head wondering about where Stiles was and what he was up to.

He didn't understand why he felt sick in his gut that Stiles was out with someone else.

It just made him feel dizzy with something he didn't have a word for. Every time he pictured Stiles laughing at the guy jokes, playing footsy under the table, holding hands on the walk back to the car, kissing on his front step- his chest tightened painfully.

He knew what this disgusting feeling was now, and he felt pathetic for it.

Derek stood and without a word went up to his room and crawled into bed.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

Summer break had officially arrived and Derek was having the boys help him set up the pools in the back yard.

He hadn't seen Stiles in the past few days and it's been both wonderful and absolute agony. He was grateful to have a break from seeing Stiles's smile and shining eyes, hating knowing it was never for him. But he missed it all the same.

Either way, the space between them allowed Derek the room he needed to rebuild his walls. If Stiles was dating this other guy fine, Derek hadn't had a chance anyway. He'd very his heart and settle for just being pack.

The girls sat on the front steps far enough away from the guys on the other side to not hear their conversation. Even with super wolfy hearing.

"So, what happened?" Allison eyed the two who clearly knew more than she did. Both of them are closer to Stiles and Derek, respectively. "I was under the assumption they'd be giving us invitations to the wedding by graduation."

Erica chuckled sadly, "I don't know. But you should've seen Derek when I told him Stiles ditched us to go hang out with Markus."

"I don't know what's gotten into Stiles," Lydia grumbled, she hated being left out of the loop. "Just last month I was giving him advice on how to woo a man. Mind you, Markus was not the man I thought he'd be running off to woo."

"I don't think anyone thought that." Allison sighed.

"It's weird," Erica grumbled. "The past few days honestly feel like my parents are divorced. I only see either or, Stiles gets us on the weekends." Lydia laughed.

"How does that work?" Allison questioned.

"I don't know," The blonde shrugged leaning back on her hands. "I've never really asked. But it's all sort of instinctual. Like Derek is the alpha, he gives orders and dishes out punishments. Stiles is there to comfort our wounds and give Derek a smack upside the head if he's too hard on us."

"Instinctual?" Lydia grimaced. "Wait, like even your wolf thinks Stiles and Derek were on the road to being a thing?"

"Well," Erica sat up and frowned. "Honestly, before Stiles ran off with Merkus after the game and I told Derek about it, I thought they already were. It just made sense. Isaac said something a little while ago when I came over cause 'Mom and Dad are fighting again'. We all just kinda felt it I guess."

"Huh," Allison thought. Lydia smiled, the other two girls eyeing her suspiciously.

"What are you thinking?" Allison asked carefully.

"Oh," She smiled watching a blur jeep pull up the driveway. "Right on queue. Follow my lead ladies."

The two spared a look at each other before watching Stiles climb out of the jeep plastic bag in hand and a box-taped shut- under his arm.

"Hey, where is everyone?" Stiles eyed the house while approaching the girls.

"Outback." Erica supplied with a nod of her head.

"Surprised to see you showed up." Lydia offered, standing and going inside without giving him a chance to respond.

Allison followed without a word and Erica, slightly confused, gave him a quick look before rushing to follow. She didn't understand what Lydia's plan was but he didn't exactly wanna be left alone with him. She was not a fan of awkward situations.

Stiles stood there slightly hurt and very confused.

"What's wrong with you?" He asked following the girls into the kitchen. "What did I do now?" He busied himself unpacking the baked goods into the snack cupboard and the sunscreen he'll be needing later on the counter. He took a second to tuck the box off the side in the corner out of the way.

"It's nothing, Stiles." Lydia sighed, as though she was more hurt than anything else. The other two followed her mellow demeanor and avoided looking at Stiles.

"Okay," Stiles groans, getting a little paranoid. "So either I did something stupid and you're angry with me, or I did something really stupid and hurt your feelings?"

"Stiles," Lydia warned, lifting her hand to stop him from talking. "I don't wanna talk about it here, it's not my place."

"Heh," Stile let out a dry chuckle. "Since when is it not your place to talk about things I did to hurt you?"

"Cause you didn't exactly hurt me." Lydia put up a good front of being frustrated and emotionally exhausted.

The two were so focused on each other, that no one but Allison saw Erica's eyes widen and head start to shake as she motioned to the doorway leading out the back of the house.

"So I did do something stupid and hurt someone's feelings." Stiles nodded like he was finally getting to the bottom of it. "What happened?"

"Stiles," Lydia gave him a firm glare like it was supposed to be obvious what he did. Stiles just freaked out a bit at the knowing accusation in her tone and shrugged exasperated. "You broke things off with Derek!" She said louder than she really needed to.

Stiles blinked, obviously confused. "What?"

Erica cleared her throat, making the two look towards her and Allison who just started at something over their shoulders shifting awkwardly.

Stiles, mouth still slack with complete and utter confusion followed their gaze and looked to see Isaac and Derek standing there looking just as awkward. Well maybe, that was more Isaac.

"Um," Isaac cleared his throat daring a glance at Derek who stood completely still and stoic. "Pools ready."

Stiles looked around at each face in the room, all of them looking at him with uncertainty and then to Derek with sympathy.

"What?" Stiles asked again more exasperated. He gave everyone a look one last time before addressing the room as a whole, "There wasn't ever any breaking things off, me and Derek were never together."

"You weren't?" Issac asked completely unsure, looking to Derek for confirmation.

"Yea-" Stiles rolled his tongue along his lips and put his hands on his hips like an offended mother. "I think I'd remember being all up on that." He motioned to Derek who only raised a brow.

"Oh," Isaac nodded, still unsure. "You hen you and Markus... " He trailed off.

"Huh," Now Stiles looked really offended. "As if."

Lydia laughed at the unintended reference before she quieted herself and motioned the girls to ditch the awkward air with her. They all, as though if they moved too fast someone would be angry, stepped out into the hall and went the long way around back, through the front door.

"What is happening?" Stiles looked to the two completely bewildered as to where any of this was coming from all of a sudden.

"Um," Isaac looked to Derek who hadn't moved an inch. "I'm gonna-"

"Hold it!" Stiles raised his hand and pointed an accusatory finger at him. Isaac stopped in his attempt to back out of the room, frozen in place. "What the hell is all this drama about?"

"Um-"

"Say 'um' one more time, I'm gonna burn your scarf."

"Wh-" Isaac pouted for a moment before awkwardly shuffling between his two feet. "We kinda all thought you and Derek were, um-" He froze and dared a glance at a very unamused Stiles and an increasingly amused Derek. "Together, and you've been spending a lot of time with that Markus guy so we figured you two split-"

"That's enough." Stiles waved him away. Isaac was grateful and ran out back without a second glance.

Stiles sighed, facing Derek with a blank stare. Derek looked even more amused about all of this now that everyone was gone.

"You think this is funny?"

"I didn't realize that's the conclusion the pack came to." Was all he said.

"Well, we should probably make some things clear before the kids side with you in the divorce." Stiles scored playfully trying to hide his nervousness. He really didn't expect this to be the way he ended up addressing his and Derek's relationship.

"You think they'd take my side?" Derek raised a brow. "You're the one that spoils them."

Stiles just laughed, it's all he could do. They were standing ten feet apart, dancing around the subject.

Derek took a whiff of the air and smiled at the scent of stiles that became more and more permanent every time he came over. If it weren't for the past few days, and Isaac living here, Stiles was here the most out of everyone.

"So," Derek tried to think of the jerk's name, "Markus, you guys aren't," He made and gesture with his hands, looking away from Stiles.

"No, god no."

"Right," He nodded, "Cause when you came home from that party, you smelled like. . ."

"What?" Stiles tilted his head. He remembered being left in the dark room wondering what made Derek look so uncomfortable, and actually a little angry. He had a hard time trying to sleep cause his mind kept asking questions.

"A stranger, and sex." Derek put it bluntly. Stiles's eyes bulged out of his head and Derek almost laughed.

"What? No," Stiles recoiled in shock, not expecting him to say that.

"Then you started leaving us behind to go hand out with this guy you met at the party." Drek shrugged.

"The dude I met is not-" He stopped himself from saying the word, it sounded too absurd. "I met Markus, he was DD'ing for his friends, we got to talking. He offered to pay me to help him study. That's it!"

Derek nodded in understanding. He didn't need to hear Stile's heartbeat to tell that was the truth.

"Must have been a good amount of money for you to ditch the pack twice," Derek said, not really making it a question. Stiles chewed on his lip as Derek approached the kitchen island and leaned on it. "What?"

Stiles sighed turning to grab the box and placing it on the island and slinging it over to Derek. "The allowance I get from Dad every now and then wouldn't have been enough."

Derek stared at him for a moment before turning his attention to the box curiously and carefully opening it.

"It's just a housewarming gift," Stiles shuffled in place, looking anywhere but Derek.

Derek looked down in the box at stacks of plates and bowls, cups, all individually wrapped. Derek took a plate and gently tore it free from the plastic wrap, examining the intricate royal blue patterns along the edges, and the vibrant red and yellow flowers painted in the center. The flowers are arranged in the vague shape of a wolf, with leaves surrounding it like a nest. The dish was glossy, polished, and shinny, and smelled of somewhere old but clean. turning it over he saw painted in very neat handwriting, "The family is One of Nature's Masterpieces. Proberty of Hale, made by A. Bartosz."

Derek looked up to Stiles who started at the plat in his hands.

"Um, they're hand-painted, I went to a place out in Allens Town. A polish place. You've been using paper plates and stuff so I figured," Stile trailed briefing a look at Derek before returning his gaze to the plate. "In Poland, there's a belief that the beauty of the dish enriches the flavor of the food. You're always cooking for everyone so I thought-" Stiles cut himself off with a sigh and scratched the back of his neck.

Derek carefully set down the plate and walked around to Stiles who was still looking anywhere but him.

Next thing Stiles knew, he was warm. Really warm. Warm around his waist from Derek's arm, warm in his cheek where Derek held, warm on his lips where Derek kissed.

Stiles melted against him with a relieved sigh. It felt like he was in a dream he never wanted to wake up from. A dream the never thought would come true, no matter how many times Lydia told him to go for it.

He lifted his hands and placed them firmly on Derek's chest, one sliding further up to the base of his neck. He had no idea what he was doing, and he was fairly certain Derek knew it based on the rumble of laughter in his chest. But he followed Derek's lead and soon found a rhythm that made Stiles's knees weak.

When Derek finally pulled away, Stiles straight-up whined in protest, earning a chuckle from the alpha.

"Thank you," He smiled softly stroking Stiles's cheek with his thumb.

Stiles was giddy at the affection, smiling dreamily up at Derek. It made something in Derek stir back to life. The walls he tried to build back up the past few days crumbled down around him as Stiles pushed up into another kiss, hands coming up around his neck and into his hair. Derek hugged and his waist and pulled his impossibly closer, sighing in contentment.

"No," They heard a sudden shout, pulling apart and looking to the back door. Erica was moving away with her back to them heading back into the yard. "They're busy eating each other faces!"

"Oh, my god." Stiles groaned. Derek only chuckled turning back to Stiles and pulling him back in.

≫ ────── ≪•◦ ❈ ◦•≫ ────── ≪

•Kermitts Masterlist•

[pickingupmymercedes]

Ways to say "I love you" part 2 - Lewis Hamilton

I think we all deserve a little something after the horror we went through in today's race ❤️

warnings: mentions of blood, accidents and bit of angst

wordcount: +2k

important: again, each drabble was writen as a snippet into different moments with Lewis. Special thank you for my 💗 anon for helping with some of the ideas

As always, my asks are open for corrections, ideas and just to chat too!

Over a cup of tea

“We need to talk this through, before it blows in our faces, Lewis” Serious expression on your face as you handed him the cup of tea on the balcony of your apartment overlooking London.

“Mhmm, we do?” He questioned confused.

“Yes…what exactly are we?” You couldn’t look him in the eye as you questioned him, too embarrassed you weren’t sure if what you felt the night before was real, even if come the morning he was still there, as he had been for the past two months.

“Those words last night meant nothing to you?”

“They meant the world, actually”

“But you don’t feel the same?” The confusion now passed on to him, forehead scrunching as he questioned if he hadn’t read your relationship right, and your body responding before your head could think it through as you reached for the hand he willingly let you take.

“I… I need to feel safe to say it back.” You responded after a few awkward seconds of silence as he waited for your response.      

“I want you, if you’ll have me. I really do love you. And you don’t need to say it back now, just let me know if this relationship is for real, because I want it to be.” He said looking into your eyes, anxiously waiting until you lifted your head to give you a smile.

“Thank you for understanding” You said buried into his neck as you took the tea away from his hands and brought him closer.    

Over a bottle of wine

��Found board games!” You excitedly exclaimed as you walked back into the house. Tiny feet stomping away and reaching you in seconds.

“Is there Monopoly? Uncle Lew said we could be here for daayssss” Willow was the first one to start taking the boxes as you handled her and Kaiden the pile you had just borrowed from the nearest neighbor

“Are they still stuck in New York?” You asked Lewis just as he set his phone down.

“Earliest forecast is tomorrow night, possibly” a concerned look to him as his mom and sisters got stuck in a snow storm on their way from England to Colorado.

“Guess we have these two to ourselves then”  

“Granny said it’d be good practice for you to take care of us” Kaiden chirped in but not fully aware of the shock in Lewis’ face at the remark.

“It’ll be fun when there’s two more girls to play with” This time Willow getting you to choke on the water you were drinking.

“Why two girls?” Lewis amusedly asked, aware you were still trying to hold the laughter in the kitchen

“Dunno” She simply shrugged as she helped her brother set up the game.

“Two girls, huh?! You know people say I’m a girl dad…” He brought back the subject as he picked up the mess left in the living room, a glass of wine open on the kitchen counter and two glasses already in your hands as you approached him after putting the kids to bed.  

“I think I’d be happy with that” Your soft smile easing the tension you felt in him as he mentioned kids with you for the first time, handing him his glass and dragging him to sit down on the sofa for a bit.

“I think I’d prefer a boy then a girl, you know, so he could be there for her.” He said after a bit of silence, almost as if he was pondering what would be best order, and you could feel the yearning to have kids of his own in his voice.  

“I agree with the internet people on that one, you’re too much of a girl dad, babe” You set your drink on the side table, cuddling closer to his chest as he pondered on his glass.

“Doesn’t really matter, honestly, just one would be more than enough. As long as I got you too”

As an apology

“What the hell was THAT for?” You threw your handbag and phone all the way across the kitchen island as you looked at Lewis standing at the door, an annoyed look to him.

“That guy shouldn’t have approached you” His mind still on the tall blue-eyed dude that tried to buy you a drink at the club.

“I can handle myself you know?! Never had the need for a knight in shining armor…” all your anger gone as you realized how absurd that sounded when said to your knighted boyfriend, a smile cracking the tough face you were fighting hard to keep.

“I love you, okay?! You may not need to be saved from a monster but you’re gonna have a knight by your side regardless.”

Taking the cue, he reached for you and brought you close by your waist, tucking one side of your hair behind your ear while using his other one to caress your check.

“Yes sir.” His sweet eyes turning into dark one as he heard you whisper the title and felt your hands rummage through his back. 

As a hello

You smelt his cologne before he walked back into the room from the bathroom, woody and citric tones overcoming your senses as a light tug at your exposed breasts demanded your attention back.

“Hey darling, you done there? Sure you don’t anymore?” The little fingers of your month-old baby girl clutching your fingers as you softly redirected her small mouth back to the spot her eyes wildly looked for.

“Gosh, I love you two so much” His remark a common occurrence in your daily routine in the bubble of nappies, changes and feeds your lives had turned into those past weeks, in the dead of the cold but sunny winter in Monaco.

“Hello to you too, hot stuff” he smiled back as you checked his toned abs adorned by the towel in his waist, sitting by your side in the headboard of your bed, hands caressing your thighs.

“You sure you’re going to be okay here this weekend?” Concern written all over his features as he stroked your daughter’s tiny legs.

“Your mom’s here, my mom’s here, we’re gonna be just fine Lew.” His eyes searching for any doubts in your mind.   

“I’m only a call away, okay?!” He whispered as he kissed your head, enjoying the last moments he would have with his little family for a few days before yet another season began. 

With a shuddering gasp

It’s funny how time really is relative, you thought as you slowly watched four cars pile onto each other in a traffic jam that had just about three other cars in front already. You weren’t even paying attention to the road before, only really looking up from your phone when your car suddenly swerved right and hit the grass on the side of the road.

“Are you okay y/n?” His whole body hovering over yours, hands already unbuckling your seatbelt as Lewis tried to grab your attention.

“C’mom babe, we need to get you out of the car, now” He tried again but you couldn’t respond back, still in shock from the near miss, your hands a wobbly mess as he squeezed it.

“I’m carrying you outside, okay?!” He didn’t even wait for a reply before lifting you like you weighed nothing, examining you in the process to check for anything hurt while he carried you to the rest of people waiting by the road.

It took a while, more than a few minutes for your eyes to start focusing back on your surroundings. He was knelt right in front of you, worry all over as he asked again and again if you were hurt.

“You saved us” You gasped quietly as your eyes finally reached his, his hands cupping your face the second he heard you, your lips already on his as you felt his arms taking you into his body.

In a letter

You’d been, since the beginning, the one he wanted, comings and goings through the years hadn’t been able to diminish the electric pull he felt whenever he saw your smile light up the room, even from afar. But as if the universe liked having a laugh at their expenses, time and time again you’d both find your lives going in complete opposite directions. So, as he sat in his desk writing his vows, he could only be amazed that by some miracle he had found his way into your life and into your heart.

“ … So, I vow to be your lover, companion, partner and ally. Through what may I promise to always be there. I might not have the answers or tools but I’ll walk with you, through the darkest of valleys or at the summit of our dreams.

I love you for you, because you give me the chance to be my truest self, because when you’re around I know we’ll find our way through. I love you, and from the moment I learned that, I’ve been giving it my all to be worthy of you.”

When the broken glass litters the floor

“Fuck, why did I do that?” Your exclamation coming out a bit louder than expected as your eyes started to water from the sharp pain in your hand, blood already dripping from the gush on the palm as you looked to the pieces of the glass on the floor.

“Babe? What’s happened, what was that noise?” His voice coming from just outside the bathroom door, fidgeting with the lock to try and get in.

“Please, let it be a good timing” Was all you could whisper to yourself, the knot in your throat almost suffocating you, the reality of it all too much to comprehend or process, your feet automatically swerving the glass and blood on the floor to get to the door.

“I hope you don’t have anything important going on in the next months” you said just as his eyes tried to scan you and the bathroom. His features with confusion all over as you handled him the stick with the 2 lines on them.

“What’s… but the doctor said…really?” You watched as all types of emotion tumbled across his eyes, overwhelmed an understatement to what you both felt at that moment.

You nodded just slightly after a few moments of his eyes questioning yours, the start of a smile forming on his lips as his arms reached you and engulfed you in a hug, crashing your injured hand in the process.

“Ouch, hand” He froze as you winced, putting two and two together, looking to the blood and the remains of the glass and seeing the injure on your palm for the first time.

“I do hope this kid takes after you and isn’t as clumsy” You pointed as he sat you down at the tub to check the cut. His smile reaching all the way to his eyes as he chuckled and looked at you.

“Nah, I hope this kid is every bit just like you.”

With no space left between us

You could feel his movements as he opened the parachute and brought you two back down to safe land, but nothing managed to tear your eyes from the immensity of the sky. There was infinity as long as your eyes could see and you were nothing in comparison, your thoughts long lost to the smallness of human race.

“You were awfully quiet up there, you good?” His voice a bit dry from the wind, your bodies tightened together as the guys got you both out of the mess of ropes.

“I think I’m still processing how small we really are” You answered almost to yourself, still trying to comprehend what you had just experienced.

“Another go at tandem is due then?” You saw the smirk in his face as you turned to look at him, his arms still very much wrapped around you and his fingers circling in your forearm.

“Thank you for dragging me out here, but how did you know I’d like skydiving?!” You reached back to his arms while they strapped you out of the seat, holding him closer, still with the ghost feeling of the wind around.

“I love you… that’s how I knew you’d love it.” He said to your hair as he held you to him, smug face as he reveled in the feeling of you.  

From very far away

The speakers blasted the victory song as each of the three drivers on the podium sprayed champagne around, everyone drenched and smiles thrown left and right, laughs being heard all the way around the Monza podium.  

As Lewis stood by the edge of the platform, he lifted his trophy at the sea of Tifosi, as a way to show appreciation for the support so far on the season and at his new home race, dedicating his win to them.

Turning to the pitlane he also pointed his trophy to the Ferrari team, scanning the crowd he found you at, just by Fred and Anthony, tears flowing down and a gleaming smile that could light up his entire soul. You tried mouthing something to him but he couldn’t quite make it out in the overwhelming state you were all in.

“I love you” he said to you, from the top of the podium, knowing that whatever it was you were saying, and whatever it was that happened, could be answered and resolved with those three words.

[connorsbonez]

Stalkers and Cryptids: Incorrect Quotes #2

Danny, Bernard, and Wes are sitting on a bench

Tim: Why do you guys look so sad?

Danny: Sit down with us so we can tell you.

*Tim sits down*

Bernard: The bench is freshly painted :)

0000000000

Dick comes to visit

Danny, setting down a card: Ace of spades

Bernard, pulling out an Uno card: +4

Wes, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you

Dick, trembling: What the fuck are we playing??

Tim, placing down a card: Go fish.

00000000000

Danny: *Screams*

Wes: *Screams louder to establish dominance*

Bernard: Should we do something?

Tim: No, I want to see who wins.

00000000000

The Monopoly Game

Danny: Tonight, one of you will betray us.

Bernard: Is it me, Danny?

Danny: No, it’s not you.

Wes: Is it me, Danny?

Danny: It’s not you either.

Tim: ...Is it me, Danny?

Danny:

Danny, mockingly: Is IT mE DaNnY?

000000000000

Wes: I think we're missing something.

Bernard: Teamwork?

Tim: Cohesion?

Danny: A general sense of what we’re doing?

0000000000000

Bernard, tilting his head: Why are your tongues purple?

Wes: We had slushies. I had a blue one.

Tim: I had a red one.

Bernard: oh

Bernard:

Bernard: OH

Danny:

Danny, the dense king: You drank each other's slushies??

00000000000000

The Sleep Deprived Slumber Party

Bernard, laying flat on his back: Can I be frank with you guys?

Danny: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.

Tim: Can I still be Tim?

Wes, setting his hand over Tim's mouth: Shh, let Frank speak.

000000000000000

Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.

Tim: Shit.

Danny: Wait, three?

Cop: ...Yeah?

Bernard: OH MY GOD WES FELL OFF!!!

000000000000000

Wes: Dammit, Danny!

Danny: What?! It wasn’t me!

Wes: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Tim!

Tim: Not me either.

Wes: Oh...Then who set the house on fire?

Bernard: *whistles*

000000000000000

Danny: ARE YOU-

Wes: Fucking.

Danny: KIDDING ME?! YOU-

Wes: Fucking.

Danny: IDIOT!

Bernard: …What was that?

Wes: Danny's mom's swearing senses have been going off, so I’m helping him out.

0000000000000000

Rom-Coms

Bernard, gesturing towards the love interests: They make a cute couple, huh?

Wes: They certainly are standing next to each other.

00000000000000000

Pre-OT4, Beginning Stages of the OT3

Danny: I'm so happy, I could kiss you!

Tim: Um...Neat.

*Later*

Tim, lying face down on his bed: I said "Neat," Wes. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm fucking stupid.

Wes, reading a book: Don't beat yourself up too much, Tim. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I told you I did when Danny confessed his love for me?

Tim, slowly lifting his head: ...Didn't you thank him?

Wes: *closes the book and looks at the ceiling* I fucking thanked him.

[louis--wifey]

WTTT Incorrect Quotes but it's just things that people in my real life have said

It's so long I'm so sorry 😭😭

~~~~

Illinois, cleaning his shoes: Last time I wore these shoes I got apple butter on them..

Ohio: I remember that song. *singing* Apple butter shoes, boots with the fur.

~~~~

Florida: *yapping*

New York, who forgot his phone in the car: I'm going to get my phone so I can ignore you for a minute.

~~~~

South Carolina: Georgia and I are dressing at Waylon and Willie for Halloween!

North Carolina: I could be Johnny Cash and just lay there in a coffin... *To the tune of Hurt by NIN covered by Johnny Cash. Johnny Cash impression.* I hurt myself, today

~~~~

Washington, helping Nevada with his math homework: Let's break it down

Nevada: I'll break it down *gets off of his chair and starts break dancing*

~~~~

Kansas: That sounded like a car commercial...

Oklahoma: I can write car commercials all day long.

~~~~

Maryland: Nothing says hot like harmonica!

(I have no context for this btw. My professor said it a couple weeks ago and I tuned into the conversation as soon as he said it and I have no idea what was happening before hand)

~~~~

Michigan: Hey, Ohi-

Ohio: And all of the sudden I heard an irritating, grading voice. And it was yours.

~~~~

Illinois: My grandma has chickens, and she's obsessed with chickens.

Minnesota: Tell your grandma to call me.

~~~~

Arizona: If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go lock myself in the cooler.

Utah: Bang on the door if you need anything.

~~~~

Florida: *lands on go to jail in Monopoly* Noooo in jail again!?

Gov: That's something we need to talk about. If you keep driving so fast you're going to end up in jail.

Florida: Oh I thought this was gonna be about me puking in the county jail parking lot...

~~~~

California: What three characters have omniscience?

Florida: Your mom

California: What four characters have omniscience?

~~~~

Colorado: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

Wisconsin: FOOD TRUCK!

~~~~

Missouri: Guess what my dream car is

Indiana: A Lamborghini

Missouri: No

Indiana: A Kia Soul

~~~~

Washington: New York with the leadership skills!

New York: I just know where I'm going -_-

Washington: Say "I'm New York and I'm a baddie"

~~~~

Texas: Can you count change? *Looks down at the change California gave him* You can!

California: I'm great at counting change, I used to do it for fun when I was little. Because I didn't have any friends.

Texas: Pfff-

~~~~

Oregon: A Monster a day keeps the straightness away.

~~~~

Nevada: You look like a clown.

California: Am I a pretty clown?

~~~~

Gov, to Louisiana and Florida: I would stop whining so much if you two stopped drinking alcohol.

California: Sometimes your whining makes me wish I liked alcohol.

~~~~

Florida: Gov, I'm helping!

Alabama: By... Making it harder?

Florida: Yep!

~~~~

Florida, singing: Everybody was kung fu fighting

New Jersey, to the tune Kung Fu Fighting: Everybody should shut the fuck up

~~~~

Washington's cat: *killing a bug.*

Washington: "Rip in half! Rip in half! Rip in half! When I say "beat" you say "that ass" Beat! *Long pause, points to Oregkn* Fill in for him!

Oregon: *slowly turns around in his spinny chair*

Washington: Aw, come on! You can say donkey instead. Beat!

*silence*

Oregon: No.

Washington: Fine. *dances out of the room* K-I-C-K-Y-O-A-S-S Oh yeeessss!

~~~~

Maryland: *playing a cheap toy recorder on a make-shift stage*

Massachusetts: MORE COWBELL!!

~~~~

California: I just love feeling like a menopausal woman.

~~~~

Oregon, sick: The crystal ladies said if you got sick after the eclipse, it's your ancestors banishing evil from your body.

Idaho: They're praying the gay away

~~~~

South Dakota: Wish me luck in war

Minnesota: You're not going to war, you're asking for a box

South Dakota: It's the same thing, damn it!

~~~~

Alaska: Penny for your thoughts?

Hawaii: I don't have any pennies.

Alaska: I don't have any thoughts!

~~~~

Louisiana: We can bring the baguette to and beat California with it...

Florida: Or Utah.

~~~~

Gov: If you could make any crime legal what would it be?

New York, Florida and Louisiana at the same time: Arson!

Gov: *mortified expression*

~~~~

Iowa, about chicken: Are you a thigh person?

Nebraska: I like legs... ThEy TrIeD tO pUt Me On ThE cOvEr Of VoGuE bUt My LeGs WeRe ToO LONGGGGG!

~~~~

Colorado: I need a stick!

California: I need a boyfriend, your point?

Colorado: ...Not that kind of stick.

~~~~

Oregkn: In high school my favorite past time was kissing boys.

Washington: *turns to California* Is that your favorite past time too?

~~~~

Texas: Why aren't bananas called yellows?

Florida: Because then Gwen Stefani couldn't use it in her song.

Louisiana: She'd just have to spell it different: This shit is yellows! Y-E-L-L-O-W-S!

~~~~

California: He's gay and he committed suicide.

New York: He's you... Don't commit suicide, please.

California: I WILL BECOME A MUSICAL!

New York: NOOO DO NOT BECOME A MUSICAL!

~~~~

North Carolina: I seriously hate you sometimes.

South Carolina Aww I love you too!

~~~~

Vermont: You wanna know the biggest dingus I know?

New Hampshire: You?

~~~~

Wisconsin: You're a yeasty beer

Illinois: You're a zesty beer

Wisconsin: Yeah well, your light in the loafers!

~~~~

Arizona: *says something dumb*

Nevada: Shaking my as- shaking my head.

~~~~

New York: *takes a drink of my pumpkin spice latte* Oh, that's delightful!

California: Look who's a white woman now?!

[later]

California: You basic white woman!

New York: I don't wanna talk about it...

~~~~

Louisiana: *throws a packet of French dressing at Florida, in a French accent* French

Florida: AAAAA IT'S FRENCH!!!

~~~~

Florida: Oh, I thought you were committing arson without me

Gov: If I ever decide to commit arson, I'll call you

~~~~

Florida: Ah yes, my favorite crime, trespassing. I'm joking... it's not my favorite crime

Georgia: What is your favorite crime?

Florida: Arson!

~~~~

Arizona: Finally a good song

New Mexico: Then why do you keep playing bad ones?

~~~~

*Either someone brought up Pedro Pascal*

California: He's the daddiest of daddies.

Texas: Don't say that ever again.

~~~~

Maine: There are more animals on the planet than humans and just think you could have been born a crab, but you were born a human"

Maryland: I wish I was a crab, then I could be crabby all day long

Maine: I'm all ready crabby all day long

Maryland: Yeah but if you were a crab you could crawl around and pinch people *walks away sideways with hands held like pinchers*

~~~~

Alaska: Why are you getting cologne

Hawaii: I want to smell like a masc lesbian.

~~~~

California: I've had morning sickness for the past five years

Florida: Are you pregnant-

~~~~

Washington: You can choose what you eat, whether it's vegetables, meat, or ass.

Nevada: *dying laughing* That threw me off guard.

~~~~

New York: PA, your turn to tell a word that means something bad

Pennsylvania: Would you consider emotional manipulation bad?

New Jersey: Yeah, I mean no, it turns me on

Pennsylvania: I guess my mom will really turn you on then

~~~~

Tennessee: Don't panic but there's a spider on your-

Kentucky: *Proceeds to scream bloody murder*

~~~~

Virginia: *sniffs bread.*

Virginia: "It's sourdough."

~~~~

New York: You know I'm insane, right?

California: I'm aware, but I don't care. It's one of your redeeming qualities.

[gracies-baby]

this account is the reason i am on tumblr fr. could you do one where audrey and abby are plotting to get gracie and y/n together but theyre already together and audrey and abby either see them kissing or bump into them on a date or something

Monopoly

(Gracie Abrams x Reader)

I’m so sorry this took so long 😭

——————————————————————————

"What're you smiling at?" Audrey teases her friend when she sees her smiling at her phone.

"Nothing. It doesn't matter" Gracie replies as she puts her phone down to face her best friend.

"Nothing wouldn't happen to be coming over today, would she? Me and Abby decided we should talk to her. We know you're never gonna make the first move so we're just gonna have to convince Y/n to like jump on you or something" Audrey smirks as she watches her roommates face turn red.

"Ew Audrey! What the fuck?!" The brunette groans as she walks to the kitchen.

"Don't act like you wouldn't love that!" Audrey teases before walking back to her room.

--

"Hey!" Gracie exclaims as she answers the door to see Abby and Y/n on the other side. She steps aside to let the other two girls in. Abby greets her cousin before walking to the kitchen to find something to eat, leaving the other two girls alone.

"Hi, I missed you" Y/n smiles as she quickly leans up to press a quick peck against the brunette's lips.

"I definitely missed you more. Audrey thinks I've got a crush on you by the way. She won't stop bugging me about it" Gracie replies as she looks around to make sure neither of the other two could hear them.

"Well, is she wrong? Abby thinks I've got a crush on you too. She keeps telling me stories about you as a kid by the way. Did you really rip the heads off all her dolls?" Y/n asks as she walks further into the apartment to sit on the couch.

"She was being a bitch. I wouldn't have done it if she didn't deserve it" Gracie replies, wrapping her arm around her girlfriend's shoulders, allowing Y/n to rest her head on her shoulder.

"You seem like you were a mean kid. I don't think we would've gotten along" Y/n jokes as Gracie scoffs jokingly.

"I wasn't mean! Abby was just annoying. She would always cheat at games. One time, we got into a big fight over monopoly and my mom said we weren't allowed to play anymore. We haven't played it since then"

"She still cheats at games. We should play monopoly tonight. I wanna see you being competitive" Y/n replies as she moves away from the brunette, seeing Audrey walk in.

"Gracie's always competitive. The other day, she threw my phone across the room because I beat her at Scrabble" Audrey tells her as she sits on the chair next to the couch.

"You definitely cheated. I would've won if you hadn't cheated" Gracie grumbles as she turns her eyes to the TV.

"Gracie, not everyone cheats at games. Maybe you're just not as good as you think you are" Y/n replies causing the brunette to jokingly glare at her before Abby walks in.

"Yeah, she kinda sucks at games honestly. She only thinks she's good because she always beat Henry and August but that's only because they suck even more" Abby teases as she takes a seat next to Y/n on the couch.

"Fine, lets play monopoly then. I'm gonna kick all your asses" Gracie grumbles as they all go to sit at the table.

--

"You need to pay!" Gracie yells at her cousin when she lands on her property.

"No I don't! You didn't even pay for the property! You just took the card" Abby yells back as she covers her money, making sure the brunette can't steal it.

"Y/n, tell her I paid for it!" The brunette asks the banker only to be interrupted by her cousin.

"Of course she's gonna side with you! You're her favorite!"

"Guys maybe we should stop playing-" Y/n tries to say only to be interrupted.

"I am not her favorite! You're her best friend and roommate! She would only side with me because I'm right" Gracie yells at her cousin before storming off to her room.

"That was.. intense" Y/n says as she begins packing up the game.

"Well, Gracie did tell you we weren't allowed to play. Now you know why" Abby replies before getting an idea.

"You should go follow her. Me and Audrey can finish packing up"

"Are you sure? It's just a game. I think she'll be okay"

"Just go. You would definitely cheer her up" Y/n agrees before walking to her girlfriend's room and closing the door behind her.

"Are you okay? I'm sorry, we shouldn't have played" Y/n tells her girlfriend as she takes a seat next to her on her bed before leaning her head on her shoulder.

"It's not your fault. Now you know why I broke her dolls" Gracie replies as she lays down on the bed, bringing Y/n with her and allowing her to rest her head on her chest.

"By the way, you're definitely my favorite. I love Abby but she's got nothing on you" Gracie smiles before leaning down to connect their lips. Y/n sighs into the kiss before Gracie moves to lay on top of her girlfriend so she can deepen the kiss. Just when she's about to take the other girls shirt off, the door opens causing them to jump away.

"Don't you two know how to knock?!" Gracie exclaims while Y/n lays on the bed in shock.

"How were we supposed to know you two were sucking face in here?! When did this start?!" Audrey replies with a big smile on her face.

"Around 3 months" Gracie tells them while Abby and Audrey begin to glare at the other two girls.

"So this whole time we've been trying to get you two together, you already were? Why didn't you tell us!" Abby asks.

"It's just been kinda fun sneaking around. Besides, you two would always leave us alone for hours trying to get us to confess and the alone time was kinda nice" Y/n speaks up for the first time since the other two girls walked in.

"Do you know how much I was panicking when you came home the other night with a hickey? I thought you were with some random girl! It would've completely ruined my plans" Abby tells her roommate while Y/n grins at her sheepishly.

"I'm so happy you two are together but if you ever have sex anywhere other than one of your beds, you're both getting kicked out 'cause we don't wanna deal with that" Audrey tells the both while Gracie and Y/n both look away with guilty looks on their faces.

"What the fucks wrong with you guys?!"

[dogs2shouldvote]

during my latest relisten of taz balance, i recorded every line i found even the slightest bit funny with zero context, not even who said it (though some are pretty obvious). here’s all my favorites!!

“i’m probably studying.. my cantrips”

“just say mastrubating, dad”

“don’t come in mom i’m studying my canteips!!”

.

“yeah you’ll do any dumb shit”

.

“it’s like a bag of holding! but for.. ass.”

.

“do we know how much damage we did to him?”

“six damage, you said it out loud with your mouth.”

.

“it should be in the player’s handbook! get your salty snack to enjoy while you play dnd”

.

“my grandpa says it’s rude to whisper. especially on a train!”

.

“i’m not going to go toe to toe with a crab while youre armed with a terrible scottish accent and travis doesn’t even have his sheild. i’m out! … did i say travis? i mean leman kessler.”

“nope! that was wrong all the way around.”

.

“i’m cosplaying taako right now, as a stupid man.”

.

“who’s just rolling dice? who is doing secret checks that i don’t know about?”

.

“i always waste my 20’s on perception checks. like i give a shit.”

.

“it’s completely conceivable he would have a name tag.”

“IN A GANG?”

.

“like a pelt??? like a bramble*pelt*?????”

.

“is there a math check? what are you talking about?”

“yeah it’s your fucking brain. you use your brain to add numbers together”

“16”

“what are you fucking doing??”

.

“griffin i love you youre my brother. but if my skill called history doesn’t literally help me with history trivia questions in a category called history what are we FUCKING doing here??”

.

“can i ask you a question? are you guys mean to everyone?”

.

“fus-ro-over dere”

.

“that one was actually a badass bernie sanders”

.

“hey thug! what’s your name? i’m about to tentacle your dick.”

.

“a d6 is like some dice ass dice. that’s some monopoly shit.”

.

“i thought you were saying merle, it’s his bread and his body, take 2d6 healing points”

.

“you two remind me of something… you remind me of the babe! and then i throw the glass sphere at them.”

.

“make a constitution saving throw to see if you can eat this fucking rock with your mouth.”

.

“dungeons and dragons is a. great game.”

.

“my name is magnus burnsides”

“marchins burchens”

.

“magnus would not say that. however, travis would.”

.

“can we please not talk about chekhov’s bush?”

.

“we’ve got a ball, a sack, and a tool!”

“everything is gross here in dnd.”

.

“only losers smoke, isaac.”

“i give isaac an hour long lecture about the dangers of smoking.”

.

“i’m just gonna put my mouth down there and go buck wild”

.

“there’s a lot of go cart tracks called the adventure zone and i’ve been working with my lawyer to shut them all down forever”

.

“does taako fish?”

“yeah taako fishes.”

.

“a rock hard-“

*justin, clint, and travis laugh*

“come ON, *really*?”

.

“taako rushes in!”

“what! magnus follows him.”

“merle’s good out here!”

“WHAT is going on?”

.

“how do you not have a d6 it comes with every board game”

“my daughter-“

“eats them for power???”

.

“uhhh how much health do you have.”

“im not gonna tell you.”

.

“let’s see… i am going to hurt jenkins. with a magical spell.”

.

“this is about to become the taako show starring taako.”

.

“BLUFF FUCKING BLUFF O’CLOCK?? WHAT IS THIS, HALF PAST PERSUASION TIME??”

.

“i’m not laughing in game” *justin fucking loses it*

.

“she’s the best at burning shit ever.”

.

“traaav griffin got to do his show for so long and now he’s gonna destroy yours.”

.

“fucking lup finds like. a gun.”

.

“for sure, keep it sleazy. we’re out, bye!”

.

“i have to believe…. i’m gonna get those fifteen dollars back from greg fucking grimaldis”

.

“based on the rules of the game, dad… you die.”

.

“dad’s making a jerk off motion at me”

.

“don’t play the pennywise card like you ALWAYS try to”

.

“should i talk slower so that everybody who has been complaining about us not playing dnd has time to nut?”

.

“i am a wizard. my name is taako. and i am pretty well fucked.”

.

“yeah i’ve got cumin who do you think i am?”

.

“hear that, babe? we’re *legends*”

.

“i’m clint mcelroy and i played merle hightower-“

“nope”

[riptidesblog]

Ninjago incorrect quotes

Lloyd: Sora, I’ve left a letter telling your guardians not to worry—

Sora: They won’t.

Lloyd: That you’re safe—

Sora: That’ll just depress them.

Lloyd: —and you’ll see them in a few weeks.

Sora: Do I have to?

...

Lloyd: Goddamn it,printer broke while printing out Kai's birthday invitations.

Nya: Well,what are they supposed to say?

Lloyd: "Kai's birthday"

Nya: So,what do they say instead?

Lloyd: "Kai's bi"

Nya:...

Nya: Works out either way

...

Jay: Do you guys want to see a butterfly?

Lloyd: Ooh, yes please!

Nya, with her laptop open: I'm not going to stop working to look at a stupid bug!

Jay: It's not a bug though...

Nya: ...

Lloyd: ...

Nya: Well I still don't want to see.

Nya,realizing: Please don't throw-

Jay: Whee! *throws a stick of butter*

...

Kai: You think that’s cringe? Moms around the world wait 9 months just to end up naming their kid Jay.

Jay: Hey, fuck you.

...

Morro: I’ve invited you here because I crave the deadliest game...

Lloyd, nodding: Knife Monopoly.

Morro: I was actually going to play Russian roulette, but now I'm really interested in whatever knife Monopoly is.

...

Morro: The only thing keeping me from running away and hiding from society for the rest of my life is spite. I could disappear forever, but there are some bitches whose downfalls I have yet to witness, and I wanna be around when that happens.

...

Lloyd: Remember! Curiosity killed the cat!

Kai: Yes, but you forget that satisfaction brought it back. So yes, Wyldfyre, go find out if that thing can catch fire!

Lloyd: You're a bad influence.

Kai: And you don't know your sayings.

...

Garmadon: How many children do you have?

Wu: Biologically, legally, or emotionally? Because there is a difference.

...

Lloyd: Guys it’s a shooting star, let’s make a wish!

Jay: I wish for good grades.

Kai: Nerd.

Jay: Nevermind, I wish upon the shooting star to fall down at a 30° velocity aiming for Kai. :)

...

Jay: Hey, do you know the password to Kai’s computer?

Lloyd: Fuck you,Jay.

Jay: Hey!!

Lloyd: No, you misunderstood, the password is "fuckyouJay".

Jay: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

[all-about-kyu]

Summary: just ateez being the cutest dads ever Pairing: ateez x fem!reader (individually) Tropes: parent au, established relationship au Genre: fluff Rating: G Warnings: none Word Count: n/a Note: I watched return of superman and the hello 82 episode and here we are... (yes I will take requests in this au)

Hongjoong

Gender-neutral clothing designer

His wife is a model for his brand

One daughter and one son

His daughter is older

His son is his mini-me

He and his son do literally everything together while his daughter laughs about how much they are alike

Seonghwa

Kindergarten teacher

His wife teaches high school literature

Twin boys and a younger daughter

Absolutely adores his baby girl more than anything

Always ready to play with his sons

Spoils his babies when he can

Yunho

Florist

His wife is an accountant

Has one son and another on the way

Super protective of his wife when she’s pregnant

His son is always talking to her belly (a habit he’s developed from his dad)

Always brings home gorgeous bouquets for his wife every night

Yeosang

Photographer specializing in children’s photography

His wife is an event coordinator

Has one daughter

Will do absolutely anything for his daughter (yes, even the photoshoot after she was born)

Playing princesses and nail salon >>>

He wants another kid, but it’s not the right time quite yet

San

Trust fund baby but is still very serious about the monopoly he’s found himself the CEO of

His wife is a stay-at-home mom (was an arranged marriage at first for business things, but they caught feelings)

Fraternal twin daughters

One is his mini-me, and the other is his wife’s

Will leave business meetings if his daughters want or need him

Just cause they live comfortably doesn’t mean they spoil their kids rotten

Mingi

Dance professor

His wife is a biological chemistry professor

Two sons who are close in age

The boys have his personality (chaos in a bottle)

Sometimes his sons will come to uni with him and try to learn the dance for that lecture

If the boys are quiet, they’re up to something (Mingi included)

Wooyoung

Gourmet chef

His wife is a patissier

Identical twin girls

Very sweet, affectionate, and mild-mannered girls

Both of them teach the girls how to bake and cook anything they want to learn

Would set the world on fire for his girls if they asked

Jongho

Record shop/ cafe owner

His wife is an indie artist

One daughter (his baby bear)

Lets his daughter help around the shop

He and his wife make up little songs to help her learn things

She wants things to be bear/forest themed at all times

COPYRIGHT STARLITMARK 2023© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED — reposting/modifying any fic or piece of original writing posted on this blog is not allowed. Translations are not permitted. 

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @kwritersworld​ @k-vanity​

Tag List: @sanjoongie​ @jaehunnyy​ @ericssmile​ @anyamaris​

[james-is-here]

Some fluff for ya-

Snowed in day with seonghwa and hongjoong. Reader has long hair like seonghwa and the three of them are doing a braid train. Seonghwa is on the floor playing games while reader is sitting on the couch on hongjoongs lap braiding seonghwa hair and hongjoong is braiding readers hair and it’s just fluffy and cute and Yas :3

(I’ve been needing some fluff too so I gotchu bestie)

heheh I'm writing this with a headache and agitated nose. I totally passed out after this. (This has been sitting in my drafts days after I was dying of allergies but I'm better now :)..)

Thanks for the fluff 😘 Can be read as platonic or romantic. Either works ☺️

Blogs: Um...I have a Stray Kids taglist but not an Ateez taglist and I've also forgotten who was on my All Posts taglist so um leave a comment if you don't mind so that I can get my taglists and what not figured out 😅

This hair style is what I described Hongjoong doing. I was picturing Mn with white hair with blue tips

"Thanks again, eomma." "It's no problem, really. That cabin has been handed to your father for ages and it had yet to be used." "I just feel bad." "Mn, don't fret, okay? You were told everything was okay. Think of it as an extended vacation." "But they had plans with their families and-"

You were cut off when Wooyoung jumped on your back, wrapping his limbs around you, his laugh right next to your ear as San stole your phone. "Hey! What-" "You need to stop worrying, Mn." You sigh as your hands move under Wooyoung's knees to hoist him further up your back before he slipped. You opened your mouth to complain about them missing their plans with their families but Seonghwa just covered your mouth. "I don't want to hear it...again." You glare at him as he just smiles.

"We've told you like a million times that everything is fine, everything was sorted out and our families understand. Okay?" You nod and he removed his hand and a second later, a grimace forms on your face. "Are you absolutely-" "Mn!" Wooyoung covered your mouth this time from on your back. "Shush, okay?" You sigh, walking out of the entry foyer and into the living room to find the other boys sitting around the fireplace and tv.

Standing in front of the couch, you lean back, falling onto the couch on top of Wooyoung who yelps in protest but you ignore him with a smile and reach out to San who's smiling at you with a teasing grin. "Choi, I swear, stop pestering my mom." "I'm not doing anything!" "Uh huh, yeah, sure, your smile is completely innocent. Give me my phone."

He hands you the phone and your mother's voice reaches your ear. "Mn, that wasn't nice. I was telling him a story from your childhood." "Eommaaa!" "Relax, she was just telling me about your elementary girlfriends." "Ugh, okay, bye mom." "Bye, Mn."

"You suck." "Hey, that's not nice." "How many did you have?" Yeosang asked from the floor, tilting his head back to look at you. "Are they really girlfriends? It was puppy love and it doesn't matter." "His mom said six." "Choi San!" If it wasn't for Wooyoung holding you back, you would've been chasing the male outside and locking him out in the snow.

Well, and the fact that you can't lock a fellow member and idol out in a snow storm. Guess that's an option too. (😒😂)

"Okay, Okay, let's not push him to the point of locking you outside. Mn, didn't you find Monopoly earlier?" "How much you wanna bet Wooyoung gets put in jail?" You remark and go to stand up to get the game and blankets and snacks when Wooyoung pulled you back. "Hey, I'm not that bad." "Woo, be serious." "I am!" You laugh, pulling his limbs off of you before going to collect the stuff.

When you return and plop the game on the table, the boys who are wanting to play surround the table and set it up. You notice Hongjoong on the couch, you sit next to him. "Not playing?" "Nah, Watching them play is better than playing." "Okay, well then I'm gonna sit here and watch with you."

Hongjoong laughs when you get up and sit on his lap, leaning back as he wraps his arms around you. "Was that your plan the whole time?" "No but it worked." He tightened his hold, hugging you tightly as you pulled a blanket over you two.

You watch them play the silly game for a while and at some point Seonghwa switched spots with San, saying the spot he was in was bad luck as he kept losing money, making you pout when San agreed cause you were enjoying him leaning against your legs and playing with his hair. "Don't pout, Mnie. The benefit of me being here is I get money and you can actually braid my hair." "Ooh!"

That made you happier as you pat Hongjoong's knee so that you can still sit in front of him but his crossed legs wouldn't possibly fall asleep as you lean forward and brush your hand through his hair. You decided to do french braids, you were half way through the first one when you felt a hand brushing through your own hair.

You turned around but he turned your head back with a light shove at your temple. "Hey, I'm doing your hair." "Oh dear." "Hey, it'll look good." "It better."

You finished Seonghwa's hair, smiling while giving him a head pat as you wait for your hyung to finish your hair. "Joon, are you done yet?" "Almost."

You could feel that he was doing french braids from the top of your part, braiding in a half semi circle before coming to the back of your head. You had a random ponytail holder on your wrist for Seonghwa's hair but Hongjoong now realizes he's stuck. "I didn't think this through..." "What? Oh! Hey, Sangie, in the bathroom under the sink, can you get the bag of rubber bands?" "Yeah." Yeosang left and came back just as quick. "Thank you, Sangie!"

You pass it back to Hongjoong and he ties it up, the braids, then gathers the rest of your hair and ties it to the tail of the braid, fluffing it up and making sure it looked just right.

Hongjoong took out his phone and took a picture to show you and you gasp. "Hyung, this looks so pretty! Thank you!" You turn around wrapping your arms around his neck to give him a hug. "You're welcome, Mnie."

You give his phone back and move to sit sideways, curling up in Hongjoong's lap and pulling the blanket over you. "Am I your bed now?" "Mmm, yes, you're comfy." You wrap your arm around his middle and lay your head on his shoulder, getting comfy. He wraps his arms around you, one around your back and the other thrown over your thighs, holding your legs on his lap.

You had began to doze off when Wooyoung exclaimed in annoyance. "These dice are unfair! How can I roll enough to get in jail twice in one game?!" He fusses and you giggle sleepily before huffing and sitting up. "What?" "Lay down, Hyung." He laughs at you before doing as you said, letting you lay on top of him so now you can see Wooyoung's agony better.

His arms wrap around your back and shoulders, drawing random shapes on your back and lulling you back into a sleepy state. "Hyung, I'm still sorry..." "What for?" "I can't say it, you'll get mad at me." "Is this about being snowed in which is completely out of your control and you feel bad we can't go home?" "...Maybe." "Well, we all said that it's fine. Our families understand and this just means we can all be together for longer. Just relaxing and having fun." "Okay."

As you lay there, barely able to keep your eyes open, Hongjoong noticed your struggle and smiled softly. He lifted a hand from under the blanket and began to gently rub your neck with his thumb, moving it slowly under your ear and the other one moved up and down your back, soothing you. You whispered, "I know what you're doing," as you brought your hand up to rest on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart. He replied, "Then don't fight it. Just sleep." You hum as a reply, feeling the warmth and comfort of his touch and voice lulling you into a peaceful slumber.

You allow your eyelids to droop and snuggle closer to your hyung, surrendering to his tender caresses as the sounds of the board game gradually fade away. Seonghwa's knuckles glide over your cheek gently, eliciting a soft sigh from your lips. "Aw, sleepy Mnie~" he coos, followed by a gentle pat on your head. You feel yourself melting further into Hongjoong’s embrace, savoring the warmth and comfort he provides. "So cute~" Seonghwa whispers before turning his attention back to the group, who have collectively decided to abandon the game and settle down to watch TV.

As you gradually slip into a state of serene slumber, enveloped by the soothing embrace of Hongjoong and the reassuring presence of your friends, you are struck by how truly magnificent life can be in moments like these. A sense of utter contentment spreads across your face, as you allow yourself to be swept away by the tranquility of the night, secure in the knowledge that you are exactly where you are meant to be.

[bloopitynoot]

Reading TGCF: Chapter One

For those who don't know, I am reading TGCF for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag Bloopitynoot reads TGCF. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read BUT if you followed along with my SVSSS read, the rules and vibe are the same.

We begin chapter one with a blueberry jasmine tea!

I will say that tomorrow I probably wont be posting a chapter. My mom and sister are visiting my partner and I for the holidays tonight and staying until Sunday afternoon, so I likely won't be able to read until Sunday.

Anyways, send good luck my way because we are likely going to play a vicious game of monopoly.

Let's go chapter 1!!

okay, my assumptions going in was that this was a very serious series about tough trials and hardships but here we are starting this chapter with XIe Lian taking "first place on the chart of Heavenly Officials Most Hoped to be Banished Down to the Mortal Realm". This is kind of camp. is this the series energy??? p23

omg they literally made the chart for him p24

RIP that bell. had a good run. pp24-25

I can't lol. this poor guy. If things are there that shouldn't be- Xie Lian's fault. If there are things missing that should be there- also Xie LIan's fault. How does a single guy cause so much damage? p25

Okay this is an open question to anyone. I am confused about this merit system. I totally understand that gods get merits based on worships/offerings/beliefs/temples whatever. What I do not understand is how a god gets points from a martial god kicking his ass? p26

This is so real. Bro forgot the password p27

not them placing bets on how long he'll last this time. This is so funny p27

these deities are so rude to him! He's just trying to apologize and they are so condescending. I love an underdog though so I'm rooting for this man. p29

Oh shit okay. I take back my previous contempt. This was the guy hit by the bell. p29

aaaaand we have the added salt that these two know each other previously. Xuan Zhen/Mu Qing being from Xianle Palace as well. pp30-31

Bless Ling Wen for keeping this man in check. Honestly best Heavenly Handler p32

Jesus. It's as though Xie Lian is in a room talking to all his exes. This is so awkward! Nan Yang/Feng Xin also being from Xianle Palace p33

Why am I so nervous about Xie Lian going on this mission??? Bro has 0 power, 0 respect, and attracts bad luck like nobody's business. p38

omg. even the clouds are against this man; causing a three day delay in his travels for blowing him the wrong way basically. Truly the god of misfortune. p39

Well. At least he has some help now? Nan Feng and Fu Yao. Also I am curious about the butterflies? Do we find out more? Is it a heavenly official thing? because if it is, that's cute. pp41-42

The name change from Lower Court to Middle Court is so funny to me. This is some pure bureaucratic drama, like 10/10 would see this in an office. Honestly this realm would make such a solid office/workplace au. pp42-43

Oop. Nothing like your support being from the palaces that absolutely hate you. p43

Well at least they are both here as "willing" volunteers and their generals don't know they are actually there. I do however sense some shenanigans due to this pp43-45

Oh Wait! This mission sounds so rad! A bride eating monster?!?!?!? I can't wait p45

Strong start!

I already have so many questions that I am going to assume will be answered somewhere between now and the other seven books BUT I am so ready. We already got a workplace drama, an exciting mission, and this adorably useless little man trying his best. I cannot wait for chapter two!

[triplefrontierbabe]

Where Were You? Part 3

F! Reader x Benny Miller Series

Summary: following her father's death, twenty one year old Clara Davis returns home to Florida in an attempt to bring some normalcy back to her life. Yet, the people she's been avoiding for five years just might be the people she's been needing to be around all along.

Warnings: mentions of death, smoking, language, drinking, mentions of abuse (vague), age gap.

A/N: so sorry for taking a hiatus from this series, I wasn’t sure if people actually enjoyed reading it

Part 1 | Part 2

It’s the next morning. When you wake up you forgot for a moment that you slept on Frankie’s couch for the night. After taking a few moments to adjust to the sunlight beaming in from outside, you get up and head to the kitchen. Frankie is already there getting a pot of coffee started.

“Good morning, sunshine!” He says cheerily. Of course he’s a morning person.

‘‘Morning.” You say groggily.

“Did you sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you again for letting me stay the night.” You say to Frankie giving him a side hug.

“Anytime, C.” He responds rubbing your shoulder.

“Do you like eggs? I usually do scrambled but I can make whatever you like.”

“Scrambled eggs are just perfect.” You say as you take a seat on a stool at the kitchen counter.

Frankie cracks a few eggs into a pan and lets them cook while he pours you a cup of coffee.

“Milk and creamer are in the fridge, help yourself.” He offers to you. You stand up and walk to the fridge. Right as you’re opening the door, something catches your eye. It’s a picture of you, dad, Will, Benny and Santi from a game night way back when. You’re all seated at the kitchen table, you in the center with the biggest, cheesiest smile on your face. Gosh, that must’ve been close to ten years ago. That night was when you beat all the guys in Monopoly for the first time ever by making them all go bankrupt. Everyone claimed you somehow rigged the game but you attribute your success to the cat game piece. You never lost a game when you played as the cat from that moment on.

“I remember that game like it was yesterday.” Frankie says breaking you away from your trip down memory lane.

“I can’t believe I beat all you old guys at it.” You say laughing at the memory of Santi’s shocked face when he was the first to go bankrupt.

“You know Will used that as motivation for Benny in training.” You look at Frankie with a confused look.

“He would say ‘I know this isn’t the same guy who lost monopoly to a 12 year old girl’ whenever Benny was slacking in training.” Frankie adds. “He hates losing.”

“Of course that would fire him up.” You muse at the thought of Benny getting heated over losing a board game to a teenager.

“That motivation seems to have done him well. You should see him in the ring.” Frankie says mixing the eggs around in the pan.

“That stuff seems intense.”

“Well, yeah, you know how Benny is. He always likes an adrenaline rush.”

You grab the creamer from the fridge and close the door. Coffee has never been your go-to drink of choice for the morning, as you prefer tea. But living paycheck to paycheck in South Carolina taught you to tolerate the taste of coffee simply for the caffeine boost.

As you sit back down at the counter, Frankie dishes you out some eggs onto a plate before serving himself. He stands across from you at the counter still careful of giving you your space.

You eat your eggs in a comfortable silence. Sipping on coffee between bites. Your mind briefly recalls last night’s events and your stomach does a little flip. Anxious about what’s to come next with you and mom. Frankie can read you and your pensive look like a book.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” He asks leaving the question open-ended enough for you to say what you feel fits as an answer.

“There’s not much to talk about.” You say bluntly. “My mom doesn’t like me, that’s all.” You shrug as if this whole ordeal isn’t emotionally exhausting for you.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Your knee-jerk response is to blow off Frankie’s caring nature as that has been your reaction to most people the past couple years whenever you were shown an ounce of empathy.

“I’m just in a tough spot right now. Everything feels new to me yet old at the same time. I don’t know who to trust again. Hell, I don’t even know how to trust again. I know I pushed you all away and I shouldn’t have but I didn’t know what to do.” You begin to say. “And I feel shitty for never answering you.”

“I can’t hold that against you. I can only imagine how tough it was for you.” Frankie says coming around to your side of the counter and sitting at the stool next to you.

For the next thirty minutes you tell Frankie basically everything you told Benny last night. Minus the ex-fiancé part. You can’t bring yourself to break Frankie’s heart with that information. Not now at least.

It feels good to get this off your chest and it feels ever better to be heard by someone for once in your life.

Frankie’s always been there for you. He’s been like a cool uncle or older brother to you. He was always there for you growing up. Whether it was attending a talent show or trying to help you with math homework, he always made an effort to be part of your support system. Even when you shut him, and everyone else, out for years.

As you wrap up your conversation, Frankie walks you to the door. Before you leave he says “you always have a place to stay here whenever you need, no questions asked.”

“Thank you.” You simply say smiling before walking to your car.

When you arrive back home, mom is gone at work, thankfully. You’re dreading whatever encounter may happen when you see her again. You don’t want her to completely hate you but things between you two have never been amazing. You’ve always favored your dad. And when the divorce happened, you found yourself wanting to be around him more than her.

To pass time before your shift at the bar you clean the house and shower. Whether you created a mess or not, cleaning has been a knack of yours. The constant need to strive for perfection has always been hanging around in your mind, no matter how hard you try to suppress it.

It’s a Saturday night so the bar will be inevitably busy. As you arrive at the bar, you prepare yourself for yet another long night.

“Hey Larry!” You say as you walk through the door before clocking in.

“Hey Clara, could you help out with expo?” Larry says. “We just got a lot of apps orders put in.”

“Heard.” You say heading back to the kitchen to help out.

After about thirty minutes of helping with the expo and running food, you make one last run of apps since the dinner rush has died down. A plate of fried pickles and a plate mozzarella sticks is headed to a table of middle aged men.

When you open the kitchen door you see Benny and Will seated at the bar. You’ve been so busy coming in and out of the kitchen, you’re not too sure how long they’ve been there.

“Oh hey guys!” You greet them as you pass by the bar. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Take your time Davis, we’re in no rush.” Will says.

“Alright, here are your fried pickles and mozzarella sticks. Can I get yall any sauces or refills?” You ask as you set the two plates down on the table in front of you.

As you take a step back from the table you catch one of the guys eyeing you up and down, a little too slow for your liking.

“I think we could use a couple more waters and maybe a ranch or two, doll.” The one weird guy says. He’s sitting back in his chair making it very obvious he’s checking you out.

“Sure thing.” You say plastering your best customer service smile on your face. While turning around to head back to the kitchen you hear a very quiet wolf whistle behind you. Choosing to ignore it, you scurry to get the waters and ranches.

You pass by the Millers again and they both notice the stern yet agitated look on your face. In the kitchen you grab a couple waters and set them on a tray then pick up a few ranches. You huff in exhaustion when you have a gut feeling that this table is going to try and cause you more trouble.

Once you return to the group of middle aged guys, you walk around the table setting the waters down by each man. When you get to the weird guy, you feel a hand on the back of your thigh as you lean forward to set the water down.

Choosing, yet again, to ignore the pass he makes, you hastily step away from his proximity.

“Anything else I can do for you?” You ask the table, avoiding eye contact with the one guy.

“How much?” The guy asks as he shifts in his seat to lean closer to you.

“Pardon?”

“How much to have you for the night?” He says scanning your body, taking extra time to look at your hips and thighs.

Your mouth goes dry and words escape your mind. How do you even respond to this?

“Oh, c’mon doll, I’ll even share you with the others.” The guy says extending his hand to rest around your waist to pull you closer to him.

“I-I-” you stammer.

“Hey man, why don’t you take your hands off of her.” A voice says behind you. It’s Benny’s voice. He saw the scene unfold from his seat at the bar. He was watching you, more so the creepy guy, like a hawk.

“The hell did you just say to me?”

“Take your fucking hands off of her.” Benny says as he walks to your side. When the weird guy doesn’t remove his hand from your waist, Benny places his hand on the guy’s wrist and removes him from you. You take a step back when Benny places himself between you and the guy.

By now Benny and the guy are standing face-to-face, and the tension between them is thick. Benny’s jaw tenses as he stares the guy down.

“What are you gonna do, tough guy?” The guy says taking a step closer to Benny.

Will has now joined the scene to back up his brother and try to mitigate a fight, should one break out.

“I don’t know if you were raised by wild beasts or something,” Benny starts, “but you never, ever place your hand on a woman. Especially one who graciously serves assholes like you.”

The guy scoffs at what Benny says, clearly not receiving the message.

“Maybe you should mind your fucking business man.”

“Maybe you should respect women or get the fuck out.” Benny snaps back.

And with that, the guy shoves Benny which was enough for Benny to wind up his fist to prepare a punch.

But then, Larry’s voice booms from the bar. “Fried pickle guy, you’re out! And your friends are too!”

The ‘fried pickle guy’ looks at Larry with disbelief and embarrassment. He opens his mouth to protest but is cut off.

“You heard, Larry.” Will says, cocking his head towards the direction of the door.

Without another word, the posse of middle aged men shuffle out of the bar with Benny staring daggers at them.

In a state of shock, you turn on your heel and make your way behind the bar. Larry passes by and begins to clean up the abandoned table. The Miller brothers also return to their seats at the bar. You busy yourself with tidying up the bar area, arranging glasses and wiping up the counter space.

You’re opposite of Benny and Will when you set the rag down and let out a sigh.

“You okay?” Benny asks, fiddling with the straw of his drink.

“Yeah, no, yeah, I’m fine. Thank you.” You say looking at the brothers, your gaze lingering longer on Benny as he offers a sympathetic smile.

You try to steady your breathing following the encounter, adrenaline is pumping through your veins. In all your years bartending, you’ve never encountered this kind of situation. Sure, men have made lewd comments towards you before but never has a man laid his hands on you. Especially in that kind of manner.

“The dumbass left his wallet on the table.” Larry says walking by the bar waving the wallet in his hand. “Now we know who he is so we can officially ban him.”

You and the Millers chuckle at the stupidity of the guy for leaving quite literally all his personal information at the table.

“Not a smart man at all.” Will says, shaking his head.

“I guess there’s a first time for everything right?” You say making light of this odd situation.

Benny’s gaze quickly meets yours as he tries to gauge your attitude about what had just happened. He doesn’t want to say anything that would make you even more uncomfortable nor does he want to even laugh at something that doesn’t warrant one.

“You can laugh” you say to the Millers but mostly towards Benny “I mean it’s kinda comical he’d be stupid enough to pull that shit and leave his wallet.”

“Hopefully that never happens again.” Benny says. “Even I was uncomfortable just looking at the guy.”

You and the Millers make more small talk as the night passes. You serve other guests at the bar in between conversations. Once all the customers seem satisfied you plan yourself across from the Millers again.

“Well, it looks like I’ve gotta get going now, I’ve got an early morning tomorrow.” Will says as he stands up and pushes his bar stool in. Before you can even turn to print off his bill to close his tab, he lays down a stack of bills- more than what his one drink cost.

“Keep the change, you’ve been a delightful server.” Will says before you have the chance to protest. With that, he exits leaving you and Benny, and the other customers at the bar.

The night begins to wind down and you close out tabs and start cleaning up to shut down for the night. To your surprise, Benny stays the whole time, busying himself by watching whatever is on the tvs while occasionally glancing over to you.

You finish wiping down the counter once more and giving your cash drawer to Larry when Benny breaks the silence.

“I can walk you out to your car if you like?” He timidly offers while fiddling with his hands.

“How sweet of you, thank you.” You respond as you go to grab your bag from under the bar.

You and Benny walk out to the parking lot in comfortable silence. Once at your car, you thank Benny for his kindness tonight.

“You know, I have a fight coming up next week, it’s kinda a big one, there’s a big crowd expected to be there and usually the other guys come to it and it’s a real fun time-”

“I’ll be there.” You say cutting off Benny’s rambling. For such a tough guy, he sure does have a shy side around you. All Benny does is smile and nod.

“Well, I’ll see you then, drive safe Clara.”

*****

[genericpuff]

The Kiss Bet Episode 172 - Hot Pot and Venting About How I Want My 70 Cents Back

Okay, look, this isn't a post I was expecting to make today but it's something that just happened and I have to fucking talk about, so let me preface this with some context.

I had to buy coins recently and because I switched to using my iPad for reading comics on, I got a "new reader" type deal from Webtoons for a coin bundle that got me like 100 coins for $5; because technically it was a 'new account' as Webtoons operates their in-game currency model on apps, not on actual emails (meaning if you use the app on an Android phone and then switch to an Apple iOS device, they're technically two separate accounts which you sync the reading data between via the account info linked via the email, therefore they have two separate coin wallets).

So with more coins than I knew what to do with, I decided to start FastPassing The Kiss Bet again, which I had recently stopped FP'ing around the S3 mark, as it's recently devolved back into the "will they won't they" trope, but instead of between Sara-Lin and Joe, it's between Sara-Lin and Joe's younger brother (the "true endgame") Oliver.

Now I don't mind the ship in essence. Joe was definitely not gonna be endgame, it was always gonna be Oliver, anyone who's read any amount of romance before - especially high school romances - knows how this shit tends to go, and The Kiss Bet isn't exactly trying to be groundbreaking or subversive in any way, it knows exactly what it's about and what it's trying to accomplish.

But it's almost become a little too good at this. Because in playing the "will they won't they" game for so long with a character that we know is endgame, it's basically been weeks and weeks and weeks of-

That said, after I caught up on the recent FP episodes, it seemed like stuff was finally moving a little bit. We were finally meeting Oliver's mom and his stepdad who he has a fractured relationship with, Joe was finally getting with his true endgame girl, Vicky (who's totally not an exact genderbent version of Joe lmao) and Sara-Lin was finally realizing she had feelings for Oliver.

And then the newest episode came out, Episode 172 - Hot Pot and Venting.

CAUTION: FASTPASS SPOILERS FOR THE KISS BET OFFICIALLY BEGIN HERE!

Already I was a little petty over the title like "lmao ok clunky title but whatever". I swept it off as not a genuine criticism, just me being a nitpicking asshole over what's essentially Fluff: The Comic.

The episode cost 7 coins, which is about roughly 70 cents, albeit closer to a dollar for Canadian readers (here's something they don't tell you about Canada - our Monopoly game currency is just as fucked as it looks) and that's where I'm gonna get into my second disclaimer that I need to be perfectly clear about (and it'll be what we get more into later on in this post).

I understand the principle of paying for art. I understand fully that many of these webtoons are being produced on tight deadlines by creators who often can only afford 1-2 assistants, if any at all. I understand and fully agree that creators deserve to be paid for their skills, time, and efforts, not just as creators working on the hellsite that is Webtoons, but as artists in general who deserve to make a living the same as anyone else. Anyone who follows my stuff here knows I'm an artist myself so I would never debate the ethical necessity of paying artists for their work.

However.

I can say that, and also agree with the people who have stated in discussion circles such as on /r/webtoons that a lot of the comics that have started charging 7 coins have been suspiciously delivering less comic since. And it's not even so much in the literal panel count, the liquid volume of these comics have remained the same, but the calorie count has dropped significantly. Food metaphors aside, what I mean is that despite many of these comics maintaining their 40-60 minimum panel count requirement, they have in fact reduced the actual amount of content that happens in them, and The Kiss Bet's newest episode is a stark example of what I mean.

I am going to start by posting only post three panels - three panels that literally sum up the entirety of Episode 172 and what it chooses to spend its time on.

That is it. That is literally all that's established in this episode. I'd tell you to go read it yourself, but honestly, this is genuinely one of those rare times I can honestly say that a 40+ panel episode is not worth 70 cents and you'd be better off, and that's saying a LOT when these episodes are only priced at the cost of a gumball. At least Lore Olympus has entertainment in how bad it is most of the time, Episode 172 of The Kiss Bet is just nothing. You will literally get more substance and flavor from an actual gumball.

Literally every other panel in this episode is either repeating the same dialogue (Sara-Lin saying the same thing multiple different times to express how Oliver is holding her hand or how his stepdad is a dick) and then Sara-Lin and Oliver staring at each other. Over. And over. Again.

I am not joking. I did not cut anything out in that sequence. That is where the episode ends. Complete nothingburger, seemingly cut off right as it was just getting started like Cait Corrain's career.

Out of the entire episode, there were 45 panels. So I can safely assume Ingrid's minimum panel requirement is at least 40 per episode, that's me assuming the best that she didn't exactly meet her panel minimum at 45 panels on the dot.

Out of those 45 panels, there were:

Two actual unique backgrounds that weren't gradients or just a single piece of furniture

4 separate panels of Sara-Lin freaking out over Oliver holding her hand and wondering if he even noticed

10 panels of Sara-Lin staring at Oliver either dumbfounded or asking him to repeat himself (or apologizing over nothing)

5 panels of the characters saying nothing

11 panels of Sara-Lin repeating information in different ways that could have been accomplished in half that time

Two separate occasions of Oliver getting Sara's attention from off-panel, literally formatted the exact same way both times (and both followed by reaction panels of Sara-Lin staring at him dumbfounded)

Way too many panels of Sara-Lin blushing in response to Oliver being an asshole tbh like literally this guy's a douchebag, Joe may have been the "out of her league" love interest but at least he was nice and didn't treat Sara-Lin like someone who just bought a Husky as a "starter pet" ???

Again, I don't usually like being a dick about the coin costs, and I definitely don't like being a hypocrite in telling people they should pay artists for their work while simultaneously posting their paywalled content like this, but I think there does come a point where it feels more irresponsible for people to not be aware of what they're about to pay for and how little they're going to be getting. This episode is literally one of the best - and worst - examples of how far the romance genre has fallen on the platform - when it's not being overtaken and oversaturated by problematic series that romanticize abuse and sexual assault, it's being dragged to death with the most boring executions of tropes that everyone has seen before and is only exciting for anyone who's never read a book or watched a romance movie, period.

And here's the thing where I do approach a bit more "hot take" territory, but every time I see this argument come up about episodes not being worth the coin cost, I see others who rightfully argue that 70 cents isn't that much to pay for what you're getting - weekly episodes of work that are usually always delivered on time, with more panels than you would ever typically see in a free to read comic.

But here's where I take issue with that argument, as much as the principle of it is sound, it misses the overall point: readers are paying for entertainment first and foremost, so can anyone who's actually paying for regular refills on their app currency step away from this and truly call it "entertainment"? Nothing was gained. The comic had 45 panels to say something, anything, and managed to not even squeak out so much of a word. Even the silent moments have no substance, they just reiterate information that we already know.

Do we really need another panel of Sara-Lin blushing at Oliver? We've known for weeks now that she has a crush on him. Do we really need another panel of Oliver getting Sara-Lin's attention? What is this actually showing of their chemistry? What is being shown here that hasn't been shown numerous times - with and without dialogue - for weeks now? What does the comic have to show for itself after four seasons?

Another point of the "it's just 70 cents, don't be an asshole" argument that people seem to miss is it's not 70 cents. It's $1. Because if you want to buy a single episode of the Kiss Bet, you can't just pay for the individual episode in isolation, you have to pay for the coins first, and $1 is the absolute bare minimum you have to pay to get 10 coins, which will only pay for one episode of a 7 coin series - of which there are many now, basically any series that's 40 panels or more will cost 7 coins and, shocker, those are the series that WT will tend to promote most, you'll rarely see the 5 coins series in the banner ads, and that's not even getting into how there are more and more series cropping up that have 5+ episodes behind FP rather than the traditional three.

So if you're someone who's (almost definitely) keeping up with more than one series? You can't just pay the $1, you have to pay at least $5 for 50 coins, and that will NOT go far anymore or cut as evenly as it used to when just about every series is now 7 coins. Webtoons knows fully well what kind of game they're playing by making the new coin cost an uneven number while still offering increments of 5/10 in their coin bundles. They undoubtedly want you to be left with an uneven number so that you'll be easily lured into buying more coins so you don't 'waste' the uneven amount you have left that isn't enough to buy the episodes for the series you want to read. Obviously this is more speculation and not fact, but it's a common business model and with the series that have adopted the 7 coin count model (rather than starting off with 7 coins outright) such as The Kiss Bet and Lore Olympus, it's becoming abundantly clear that either the creators or the platform itself is encouraging these series to meet their panel minimums with as little content as possible in order to get more money out of readers who are barely even being drip fed actual entertainment and narrative progression, let alone spoon fed.

And then there's the waiting. The goddamn waiting. So many of these series guilty of siphoning their content off through a hose that they're deliberately standing on are designed intentionally with the most egregious cliffhangers in mind to keep their audience hooked so they'll undoubtedly FP next week. Do you know what that amount of waiting does to a comic? To its readers? First off, it artificially extends the actual pacing of the comic to make it feel longer than it is, when in reality, many of these plotlines are happening in a vacuum of very short bursts of time. Case in point, Lore Olympus is commonly confused for having a plotline that takes place over the course of months, when actually when laid end to end in order of cause and effect, many of its subplots - including the romance of Hades and Persephone - takes place over the course of days. This over-inflates the plotline's actual depth and, even worse so, it makes it harder for readers to keep up with information that's being delivered, as it often takes weeks for that information to actually go anywhere - so by the time it does, many readers have straight up forgotten about it.

It's absolutely not okay that so many of these kinds of series are normalizing literal slow burning for an audience who's paying to be entertained. It's not a "slow burn". It's just slow, and deliberately so. It's absolutely NOT FUN to follow a comic that does not go anywhere week after week. It's frustrating. And before long, it starts to feel like gambler's fallacy, where readers have to essentially gaslight themselves into paying into it more and more convinced that it has to pay off eventually, based on a promise that was never actually made, only assumed in good faith. And readers should not have to fill in the bulk of the content that isn't happening with their own imaginations, which is something that happens a LOT in these series that spend so much time on the characters just staring at each other and saying nothing. It's not 'plot' to just draw characters blushing and have your audience fill in the rest of it entirely on their own. This is certainly a technique in writing, but in the case of The Kiss Bet and other comics like it, it's much less of a valid technique and more just flat out manipulating your audience into falling so hard into the sunk cost fallacy trap that they don't notice they're being robbed blind by the plot that hasn't actually happened - and they've been paying for that financial and emotional robbery out of their own pockets and brains every step of the way.

Again, I do not care about the coin cost in and of itself, seventy cents IS still an incredibly cheap price for weekly updates of a series that has to put out so many panels each week. But as a reader and a customer, I should not be leaving these updates with less information than what I started with. And I'm someone who's incredibly old school by webcomic standards, there are comics that I follow that have updated 1-2 pages a week for over a decade that manage to do more with their limited pages than Lore Olympus and The Kiss Bet manage to do after entire hiatuses filled with pre-production time.

Why does this page of Alfie manage to move both the intrinsic plot of the titular character as well as the external plot that's going on around her in one page made up of 5 panels better than what The Kiss Bet can do in 45?

Why does this page of Tamberlane manage to convey more information about the world's lore and the people in it in a way that's emotionally driven and clearly affecting the characters without outright info-dumping than what Lore Olympus has managed to spit out onto its plate since S3 started over a year ago?

How does Tales from Alderwood manage to be more entertaining and convey more meaningful storytelling through its characters in a single page consisting of zero dialogue than what The Kiss Bet can convey in its silent panels of staring, blushing, and repetitive stuttering?

Why are the creators who are relying entirely on their own efforts, resources, and ability to generate income through community interaction and support putting out better work with less panels and on slower schedules for FREE than what we're seeing from professional creators on a professional publishing platform who are being paid to do this as their job?

There's this saying in the tattooing industry: good work isn't cheap and cheap work isn't good.

At this point, 70 cents is not a 'bargain' as many people like to argue in defense of the creators. And while I do want to have good faith in the creators who don't pull this shit, the creators who clearly go above and beyond to do what they do in the pursuit of storytelling and polishing their craft to be the best piece of work that it can be - the comics that are worth paying 70 cents and beyond for - are not the comics that Webtoons is promoting to people. The creators of the works that genuinely deserve more than 70 cents per update are being left to fend for themselves without support from the platform, while those that aren't worth the price of even a flavorless gumball are consistently winning the Wonka Golden Ticket lottery.

The cost of 70 cents is relative. For some works it's a genuine bargain. For others like the The Kiss Bet and Lore Olympus, 70 cents is not a "bargain", it's not a "good deal", it's exactly the value of what you're paying for - cheap work that isn't good.

[wintfleur]

👩🏻‍🎨 ͡ ꒱ STELLAS RELATIONSHIP WITH HER BESTIES

au masterlist — you can find asks under #💌stellahughes!

°. — LILY!

Their theme song is ‘I Ain’t Worried’ by OneRepublic

Lily met Stella when her family moved in next door to the Hughes. Lily had accidentally Jack in the face with her volleyball, and Stella instantly befriended her after the sassy remark Lily said to Jack when he started to whine about being hit.

Stella and Carmen were having a tea party in Stella's backyard and Stella invited Lily over and the three became inseparable since then!

Lily dreams of becoming a professional volleyball player, she is one of the star players for umich team, she got a scholarship to go to umich.

Lily is an amazing golfer and Stella finds it amazing because Lily has never had any proper training. Lily just once went along to the golf course with Stella and her brothers and they were all shocked at how good Lily is. Lily and Stella are an unbeatable duo!

Lily’s nicknames are: lils, lilypad,and lee.

Lily is the ‘Crazy one’ in the trio

Lily is very protective of her friends and family, she will do anything to make sure they are okay!

The quote blondes have more fun is perfect for her! Lily is always up to something

A big party girl!

There are rumors around the campus that there is a thing going on between her and mark, but they have neither confirmed nor denied!

‘Do you wanna play mermaids?’ She was that kid!

Lilys love language is words of affirmation and threatening to beat someone up for you

Lily has 1 older sisters and a year younger brother that she loves to tease.

Lily loves spending summers with Stella and everyone, but she goes to France every summer with her family!

Lily has a small crush on Cole and everyone knows but she continues to deny it, Lily is such a confident girl so it’s funny to see how shy she gets in front of Cole!

Lily and Stella got their nipples pierced together !, Carmen holding there hands

She’s always flirting with Stella and Carmen

She has a loud but fun personality, definitely someone you would want to be friends with

°. — CARMEN!

Their theme song is ‘Dance With Me Tonight’ by olly murs

Stella and Carmen have known each other the longest, their parents being very close friends. It was always Carmen and Stella until Lily came along, and they happily became the most iconic trio everr.

Carmen is on the figure skating team with Stella, they have been skating together since they were very little.

Carmen loves figure skating but her real passion is photography and videography, she has said many times that Stella is her muse.

Carmen's nicknames are: mins, minnie, and caro

Carmen is the ‘mom ’ in the trio

Stella is the ‘shy one’ in the trio

Carmen is pansexual

Carmen also likes going to parties, almost always is the designated driver

A lot of people assume Carmen is timid from her appearance and how she portrays herself but she is far from that!

Carmen had a crush on Jack for a few weeks until she got the ick watching him dramatically celebrate beating her, Luke and Stella in monopoly. They were like 13, and she confessed to Stella after she realized the crush was over!

Carmen’s love language is gift giving and physical touch with her besties !

Carmen almost always spends summers with the Hughes family, their family’s are very close and are always together, celebrating holidays, going out, all of it !!

Carmen is an only child !! But her older cousin Liam has lived with them since he was 6, he was adopted and is great friends with the Hughes brothers. (Liam is the same age as Quinn)

Carmen wants to make a podcast with Stella and Lily!

Carmen is secretly a yapper!

Can not flirt to save her life

Carmen is very competitive, and won’t let anyone talk down on her because she’s quieter than others!

°. — TREVOR!

Their theme song is ‘Team’ by Lorde

Stella and Trevor have known each other for a long time! They had gone through a lot of phases in their friendship.

The first phase was that Stella couldn't stand him (lasted for like 5 months) he was loud and obnoxious, she had made it clear she preferred cole . . . by a lot ! The next phase was Stella realizing she had a crush on him (that did not last long) They had become close very fast after Stella realized that her crush was gone, Stella now thinking of Trevor as another much more annoying brother!

Trevor will always be on Stella's side no matter what! And boy did that annoy Jack but there's nothing anyone can do about that.

Trevor is always one of the first people Stella tells anything too!

Trevor’s nicknames are: trev, Z, and trevi.

They talk at least once a day!

These two have so many inside jokes, they will just break out into laughter and everyone is like ???

Do not leave them with a golf cart

If Stella is not ready to tell her brothers something she will tell Trevor first.

Many of his ex’s hated Stella for how close they are!

Trevor is always yapping about Stella !!

So many iconic moments of them being shown on the big screen at games !!

Stella hates swimming and has a big fear of drowning, but she feels a lot more comfortable in the water with Trevor

They are always teasing and having play fights !

Trevor is the one who has been featured the most on her YouTube channel

These two are such gossipers together

They are true besties mhm!!

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( I know this is short! But I really wanted to get it out and I honestly didn’t know what else to add! But basically Stella has a great and close relationship with them all! I was thinking of adding Tate to this because she is also really close with Stella but I decided not too! )

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( I didn’t put a lot of information, so feel free to send in questions about Lily and Carmen !!! And Stella’s relationship with them and Trevor !!! )

°. — taglist ( @privatemythss @cixrosie @toasttt11 @lxvelyzoe @lovings4turn x )