#mission failed boys we'll get em next time

[daz4i]

coming out of my room to take a short break from being insane over nikolai in bed. my mom's in the living room watching a movie where the main character is called nikolai. alright

[bunnwich]

Yeah, I missed the stinky cat man's b-day, but have a WIP.💋

[bistaxx]

No gay sex tonight sadly ( or thankfully depending on who you are)

[knifekris]

yippiee consistent mid cycle pains and symptoms

[taciturnraccoon]

i promise i'll get to answering some asks w art, im just working aaaaaaaall the fuckn time and im trying to be so brave about it

[hyper-lesbianism]

Shit, we've all been played....

R u real

no

[somereaderinblue]

Can you “Hold them down” next for Warrior!Penelope au? I just really like this song and can’t wait when it will be released!

*rubs hands together* Let's do this.

P.S. @protagaster & I are collaborating on our own Warrior!Penelope AU together so feel free to drop asks in her inbox too!

TW: threats of murder & rape.

Some of the suitresses would hum as they wove; songs passed down from mothers and those mother’s mothers, hymns for prosperity or simply melodic tunes to make sisyphean tasks a little more tolerable. Some would chat, exchanging gossip with one another, if not out of friendship then for the insatiable sake of entertainment. Some would remain silent, lips pursed and eyes narrowed in concentration at the task at hand.

But this wasn’t any mere task. It was a challenge, a competition, a race.

However, so caught up everyone was outrunning each other, they failed to realise that there wasn’t even a finish line in sight.

All but one.

Everyone startled at the harsh sound of a blade stabbing through wood. All eyes turned towards Calypso and the poor scissors protruding from her loom’s frame.

Unsatisfied, she stood up so abruptly, she knocked over her diphros. She then kicked her basket hard enough to knock over the basket in the seat next to hers, skeins of thread scattering across the floor like a spill of colourful blood.

Nobody, from the most prestigious noblewoman to the burliest guard, dared to utter a sound as the room seemed to burn with static for every angered breath Calypso took.

[CALYPSO]

Damn it with these mind games, we’ve been here for days

None of us can do this, time’s wasting away

Damn it with this challenge, no more delays

Can’t you all see we’re being played?

This is how they

[CALYPSO & SUITRESSES]

Hold us down while the throne gets colder

Hold us down while we wither with age

Hold us down while the boy gets bolder

Sisters, where on earth’s our pride and our rage?

Here and now, there's a chance for action

Here and now, we must take control

Here and now, burn it down to ashes

Channel the fire inside your soul

[CALYPSO]

Haven't you noticed who's missing?

Don't you know the prince is not around

I heard he's on a diplomatic mission

And I heard today he comes back to town, so

I say we gather near the beaches

I say we wait 'til he arrives

Then, when he docks his ship, we can breach it

Let us leave now, today we can strike and

[CALYPSO & SUITRESSES]

Hold him down, who cares if he’s crying?

Hold him down while I slit his throat

Hold him down while I slowly shred his pride, his trust, his faith, and his bones

Cut him down into tiny pieces

Throw him down, off the island shores

When the crown wonders where the prince is

Only the great, dark below will know

[CALYPSO]

And when the deed is done

The king will have no one to

Stop us from breaking his bedroom door

Stop us from taking his love and more

[CALYPSO & SUITRESSES]

And then we'll

Hold him down while his gate is risen

Hold him down while I get a taste

Hold him down while we share his spoils

I will not let any part go to waste

Here and now, there's a chance for action

Here and now, we must take control

Here and now, burn it down to ashes

Channel the fire inside your soul and

Hold 'em down, hold 'em down

Hold 'em down, hold 'em down

Hold 'em down, hold 'em down

Hold ‘em down!

[stealingpotatoes]

uh mission failed we'll get 'em next time boys.

[lordofdragos]

ITS TIME

TIME FOR THE DRAGOS WALL OF IMAGES AND SCREENSHOTS *UPROAROUS APPLAUSE* Ok but for real For the people that know what this is you already know (Great sentence there Drago glad I can speak English to say stuff like that) but for those that DON'T know This is going to be me screaming and having a mental break down about a game called "In Stars and Time" I highly recommend you DO NOT view under the read more page break if you intend to play this game at any future point in your life, which I would HIGHLY recommend the game is so GOOD AAA Anyways, off to the races!

Actually let me add tags to this post first... And done!

WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN YOU WON'T LET ME YOUR BACKSTORY This sounds like something me and my friends would say to each other when we're being assholes

Game gives us the best party member to control in my personal opinion My personal opinion is I've played this game for like 20 minutes but I threw scissors 3 times against Tutorial Kid I know what I am *Insert that always throws scissors guy meme where he complains about the rock players ruining the metagame*

L bozo sorry m8 YOU'LL GET OVER IT AXFCDHVGJN

I get the distinct feeling that everything will not be fine soon . . . Owie

Time to talk to every bird again!! I am mentally stable I swear the game hasn't already captured my entire soul what no haha

Its the Bastard tm I vaguely know about this character ALSO YES THANK YOU I NOTICED THAT HAPPENING ACTUALLY

So I MAYYYYYYY have gone through this dialogue like 30 times or something to see if anything funny would happen It didn't

Hooray for teamwork!!

DAMN KID DO YOU MIND Also note here from Future Drago Does this one not count as a loop since it tutorials you to restart in the castle? I don't think it increased my loop number

AYO?

WOK!!!!!!!!! Man I really love all of the characters but Bonnie is interesting to me because they are written so perfectly like an actual child Which means I constantly flip between YEAH CHILD ENERGY AND EXCITMENT And get this RUNT AWAY FROM ME GOOD LORD I know it somewhat sounds like I dislike them but no really just more of a testament to how GOOD the writing is

So real game

Mission failed we'll get em next time

Sometimes when the game itself tells you you cannot go further the best way forward is to fight to the death BTW I recommend losing to a normal Sadness some time good reading there

MINOR WORD CHANGE GAME I SEE YOU YOU AINT SLICK

War. War never changes. Went down purely to spite Bonnie for saying smart kid intuition we all stupid here except Odile

This conversation gave me the feels man

Funnyjokespun person! Also Hampter Sif!

End of images for this post but final thoughts at the end of this wonderful loop WHY WON'T ANYONE TOUCH SIF DID SIF ASKING TO STAY WITH THEIR FRIENDS AT THE BEGINNING CAUSE THIS DID THE FUCKING TREE DO THIS MAN?? It has been TEN HOURS and I just finished loop 4 I am so glacially slow (I think) I do basically everything everytime because I love it I refuse to fall into despair! The game will probably change that without my consent in the future though so OH BOY

Alright thats one massive post done how do I like schedule this so I can type more and have them all come out at around the same time...?

[indomitableblackdragon]

"Well you live and you learn don't ya? Even if I doubt either of us really learned much from a situation like that." Maybe not to steal? Or at least attempt to rob a dog from where they were thriving for others to see. Someone definitely back at the port would have had some choice words for NJ if they knew this was the level of "antics" she was getting into out in Spirale.

"Still if we did it again I'm sure they wouldn't notice either of us getting away. We'd be the greatest dog capers out there in the whole city."

...As if there was a competition going on for that very title.

"Hell maybe I'll find an actual dog to go adopt and keep me company around here more. Seems like a pretty enjoyable idea right?"

Unfortunately for both of them, the jig was up and as much as Aerith continued to go along with it, another security guard had appeared and promptly taken the pup from Aerith's arms and shook their head. Aerith didn't even attempt to resist because unlike NJ, she wasn't quite willing to risk it all. So, she surrendered, hands held in the air as she waited for the other to give up as well.

'Not only do we not believe either of you, we could arrest you for lying to the authorities.' But after saying that, it's clear that they weren't going to. '...But we'll let both of you off with a warning this time and a month ban from the walk.'

All things considered, they'd gotten off pretty easy, something that makes her sigh in relief. As either of the guards walks away, she finally turns to NJ and bursts out laughing. "That was so ridiculous! I can't believe we almost got away with it."

[mandareeboo]

Total Drama Island Review, “Dodgebrawl”

Last time, on Total Drama Island! The team went head-to-head in The Awakeathon, a challenge to see who could stay up the longest! It was a rough battle, but the Screaming Gophers managed to pull above the rest by the skin of their teeth, leaving the Killer Bass to choose Eva as their disqualified teammate. Heather made an alliance with Beth and Lindsay while Trent and Gwen looked out at the stars.

Like last time, the poll actually went the same as the show! Marking Ezekial and Eva as off both in canon and in this silly little fanon we're making.

This week, we come to "Dodgebrawl!" An episode a lot of people tend to forget about. But not here! Get ready for a lot of dodgeballs and maybe a few sleepy Duncans as we progress through.

SYNOPSIS

(Chris) "Duncan! You look like death, dude."

We open on the mess hall. The Screaming Gophers are chipper and happy as they dine on their mushy breakfast- the Killer Bass, on the other hand, not-so-much. Chris comes over to check in and learns that Harold snored all that night, causing a rough bout of sleep across the board. He laughs at Duncan- currently going on four days of no sleep, for those not keeping track- only to back off when the boy threatens to get tried as an adult for murder.

Someone- probably Duncan- decides to get even, painting a marker mustache on Harold. The boy seems to like it, however. Mission failed we'll get 'em next time.

(Gwen) "I'm so tired... I can't even feel my face."

Chris announces Gwen's arrival. The Gophers cheer for their clearly bedraggled teammate, still high off their win from last week.

Courtney gets on the bathroom cam to complain about kicking Eva off- something she herself had been on board with at the time. I'm picturing Eva on Loser Island pointing at the screen and bellowing HYPOCRITE.

On a more serious note, Heather goes over the refined rules for the alliance. There's three in total. 1.) Heather is top dog, don't fuck with Heather. 2.) Fucking with Heather can get you kicked from the alliance. 3.) Heather has full access to Lindsay and Beth's items, but they cannot touch anything of hers. The girls are less than pleased with this, but arguing means losing a spot in the final three.

Heather goes on to taunt the Killer Bass, leading to a glob of Chef's Delight getting yeeted into Gwen's face via Courtney.

The teams are eventually herded into a mini-gymnasium they've set up on the sand. Duncan threatens to turn this show into a snuff film before knocking out for the day on the bleachers.

Chris announces the challenge for the week: dodgeball. He explains the rules just in case someone has never been in a public school gym class before- hit with a ball you're out, catch a ball the thrower is out and you can call someone in, you can deflect balls with other balls (but if it's knocked out of your hands, it counts as getting hit), you know the drill.

The Gophers have too many players, so two have to sit out every game. Gwen is obviously out due to lack of sleep. Noah gladly volunteers to sit out as well, being not exactly a brawny fella.

This leaves the teams as: DJ, Courtney, Katie, Tyler and Harold VS Heather, Lindsay, Owen, Leshawna and Cody.

The match starts off strong with Owen throwing Tyler into a wall with a dodgeball. Harold tries for some fancy shit and fails despite Leshawna giving him a free shot, getting out immediately. Katie manages to get a likely concussed Lindsay but she's just happy to flirt with Tyler.

Gwen almost gets out onto the field but gets clocked by DJ, who she thanks before wandering off. Cody pulls some ACTUAL fancy shit and the first game goes to the Gophers. 1 to 0.

Second round comes along and Noah refuses to be switched in. Honestly, though I see why this ends up getting him in hot water, I have absolutely no room to talk and would sit out during dodgeball. Such is the life of being a wimp.

Tyler decides he's somehow the most capable player and demands all the balls. He manages to hit Chef, the wall, and- on accident- Lindsay. One for three my man.

Tyler has a moment of heterosexual panic over clocking the girl he likes and helps her up. Then he's too into his feelsies not to notice Trent coming up and gently whacking him with the ball. No one was overly fond of this move.

Owen loses his cool and decides to casually knock out the rest of the Killer Bass in a thrilling display of stanning a bi king. 2 to 0.

(Duncan) "You better have a really good reason for sticking this up my nose."

Desperate to stop sucking, The Killer Bass made a group decision to wake up Duncan. But no one's really interested in being a victim on his rap sheet, so they grab a stick and poke him with it. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

Once debriefed and properly blackmailed, Duncan reluctantly agrees to join in on the game. He comes up with a strat from his first juvy visit- grabbing all the balls and yeeting them at one person in particular. It's vindictive, it's rude, it wins them this round. What I can only assume is copyright-free Ava Maria plays over the slaughter. 2 to 1.

Frustrated by their loss, Heather wanders off to find Lindsay, currently flirting with Tyler underneath the docks. Her lesbian rage ignited, she yeets a canoe at him and drags her back to the game. During her absence the Gophers have lost again. 2 to 2.

The final round goes on far longer than the ones before it. Constant switch-outs and saves are in play, making for a rotating roster of players on both sides. Noah tries to make a joke and gets hit for fun. Rip.

Eventually, we come down to Owen and Harold. The Gophers celebrate what they feel is an easy victory. But Harold is a slippery bitch, and soon proves to be impossible to tack down. He explains he did figure skating.

Harold takes a blow to the gut but comes out victorious. Congrats, Killer Bass! Your first win!

VICTORY: KILLER BASS

Campfire time! Chris reiterates the rules, a first-time event for the Gophers: everyone safe gets a marshmallow. The person who does not receive a marshmallow must walk the dock of shame, board the boat of losers, and leave. And they cannot come back. EVER.

We all know how this goes, folks. Noah is kicked off for his lack of teamwork and respect. Chris laments that, yeah, it wasn't the most outrageous campfire ever. But he still gets paid! Fade to black.

FINAL REVIEW

Ladies, gents, and those who snuck pas the guards. It's time to find out the truth. Did "Dodgebrawl" win a marshmallow and bean its opponents in the face? Or did it get a blow to the balls, get voted off, and be forced to walk the dock of shame to the boat of losers, never to return?

"Dodgebrawl" is. An enigma. It's not the worst episode, but it's not memorable either. I daresay it's in the middle. Even as a kid, I remember being pretty bored during this one- and I didn't really see the point of voting Noah off. He was an easy target, yeah, but it wasn't like having him fighting for victory today would've done anything. Boy was a stringbean. That said, I fully expect the poll to say the same as the show this time, simply because Noah DIDN'T participate.

Verdict: 6 out of 10 marshmallows. Got a dodgeball right to the chest.

Character Mistakes:

Gwen hardly participated at all

Heather spent most of her time yelling instead of throwing balls

Lindsay never got with the program

Noah refused to play

Trent, Cody, Beth, Izzy, Owen, Leshawna and Justin all appeared to do their best

Character Remaining:

Screaming Gophers: Gwen, Trent, Heather, Cody, Lindsay, Beth, Izzy, Owen, Leshawna, and Justin.

Killer Bass: Goeff, Bridgette, DJ, Tyler, Sadie, Katie, Courtney, Duncan, and Harold.

[crabknight]

AFTER THE FIGHT,

HI GUYS HOW WAS THE SHOW???????

I see you guys enjoyed it! Do you want me to implement some audience participation next time? :3

YES WE DID! He is very :o right now - @beantothemax

HES SO HAPPYYYYYYYY The boy is joyous!!!!! -Bean

Alm:

I want a tbh creature with alm's style. It would fit so much...

Mission failed, we'll get 'em next time

DID YOU JUST MAKE A POOP JOKE???? Gray still upholding the honorable title of "Funniest Guy in Ram Village" even when hes not there

Guessing we're gonna smash cut to Celica after this while The Boys are Celebrating?

Clive stop it sounds like Alm works for Doordash THAT MOMENT WHEN YOU NEED AN ENTIRE ARMY TO DELIVER YOUR ORDER

I have bad news buddy, sorry to say. -Bean

Yay! Next up: Celica time(?)

Doordasher alm coming to YOUR house RIGHT NOW with a borrito

also YIPPEE GOOD JOB

[jettlawrence]

ok listen on top of not sympathizing the murderer man i'm aware i'm not supposed to sexualize the murderer man. but the scene in the first episode with barry covered in blood..... mission failed boys we'll get 'em next time

[the-drayster]

Yippeeee <3

Yyyup.

[ @bbleague-crispin asked: ]

i heard tenma mention something about plans to go somewhere earlier????? like huh. are you surprising me or something /silly

food

[snailwife]

smeyer wrote a Not Like Other Girls protagonist and unwittingly made her your average autistic person post #5614

[sage-greenery]

when you try to introduce ur homie to the byler fandom but they slander mike wheeler and call will byers *that guy*