#misery that he doesn’t really take responsibility for it until he makes madeleine.

[divorceblogger]

comical that louis can’t shut up about hating lestat and constantly complains about him right up until claudia murders him but floats around feeling really bad for himself that he can’t have armand the whole time he’s in paris

[queencatherynerhys]

Dangerously - Part 5 Speak Now

A/N:I have officially hit 200 followers!! Thank you so much for all the love! Seriously! I don’t know how I got here. I feel like it was just yesterday that I only had like 10 followers and then I was brave enough to release my Ruin the Friendship series and here I am. I couldn’t have done it without all of your love and your amazing support for my stories. I don’t read a lot of stories with Liam’s POV so I’m going to do most of the chapters of this series in his. I just love writing him so much and the more I write him the more I fall in love with him, through all the stupidity and idiocy. Sorry this is a short one. Also a shout-out to @kinkykingliam for the wonderful banner!

Song Inspiration: Dangerously by Charlie Puth (thank you @theroyalweisme…I seriously struggle finding a title for this chapter. For a couple weeks it was just “Untitled”)

Summary:Why is Liam at the Beaumont Estate? Will Catheryne hear his pleas? Will they ever have their happy ending?

Tag List: @kinkykingliam @devineinterventions2 @madaraism @theroyalweisme @drakewalkerwhipped @laniquelovely @drakesfiance @hhiggs @hellospunkiebrewster @alicars @mrswalkerreynolds @mfackenthal @simplyaiden-blog @hopefulmoonobject @blackcatkita @cocomaxley @boneandfur @lizeboredom @crayziimaginations @umccall71 @zarina-x-zig @writtenbycandy @ranishajay @heatherfilliez @flyawayblue56 @drakelover78 @indiacater @pens-girl-87  @katurrade @speedyoperarascalparty @greyeyedsmile14 @barbaravalentino @zilch3 @waitingforsuperman25

Previous Parts:

Speak Now

Too Good at Goodbyes

My Immortal

Alone

Liam roughly pounds on the exquisite wooden door and in a matter of seconds Catheryne is in front of him. He doesn’t know why he is there or how he got there. All he knows is that he can’t stop himself from being at this moment.

“Liam…” he hears her say. He studies her face, shock clearly written in them. It hasn’t been a day since he let her walk away and she already looks as if she had gone through months of sleepless nights. Her hair unkept and her eyes red and puffy. Liam’s guilt grows in his heart. He knows he did this to her, caused her to feel all the pain that she is feeling.

The door begins to close, but he puts his hand out instinctively. “Catheryne, please, I know that I am the last person in this world that you want to see, but please if I could have a minute of your time. At least to give me a chance to properly apologize and explain.” He begs and waits several minutes outside of an ajar door.

Finally, it opens and Catheryne steps aside to let him enter the estate. “Are you drunk?” she inquires of him.

“Maybe a little, but that isn’t the point,” he slurs and reminds her that there is a greater conversation that needs to be had.

“We shouldn’t be having this conversation when you are clearly intoxicated and impaired, Liam,” she huffs.

“This exactly the time, Catheryne!” he clearly startles her with his tone and he quickly reprimand himself for losing his temperance. “I apologize for that. I just…I am afraid that if I don’t do this now I won’t do it at all, so please just let me explain.”

He looks down at his feet and with his peripherals he can make out Catheryne moving to stand farther away from him. He can read between the line. She doesn’t appreciate his presence. How did we get here? When not too long ago, we would do anything to be in each other’s arms and touch?This is all your fault.

“You have the floor,” Catheryne’s voice brings him out of his thoughts.

He shakes his head before he continues, and he takes a moment to gather his thoughts to make sure he doesn’t make her anger towards him any worse.

“You must understand where I am coming from, Catheryne. Letting you go is the single hardest thing I have ever had to do and believe me when I say that for as long as I live I will never forgive myself for what I am doing to you now. I could only hope that you can. One day.” He looks up and is met with a sharp glare from Catheryne

“I know you are angry at me. I deserve it. I deserve the cold, angry look you are giving me now. I know you don’t want me around, but I would do anything to keep you here.” Liam slurs.

“Are you serious, Liam? Are you seriously asking me this? God, for a king you’re not very smart. I come to you, laying all my cards on the table and you turned your back. You decided that Cordonia was more important and now you’re coming here to what? Ask me to be your mistress?! Is that it? Am I supposed to understand that you broke and destroyed me for the sake of your fucking country?” Catheryne marches closer to him, clearly outraged.

“I am not asking you to be my mistress, Ryne. I am only asking that you stay in Cordonia. What is in New York that’s waiting for you? Just see reason, I implore you. Here you can have your own place. Your friends are here. Your family.”

“So, what? Am I supposed to stay here and watch you live a life with her? Be mocked and ridiculed for being the court whore? You are something else, Liam. You are really something else.”

“You’re not the court whore, Catheryne. Please, just think about it. I can give you your own duchy. Your own place. Far away enough from the capital. You never have to have interaction with the court if you don’t want to. Please, Catheryne. I want you to stay. I…I love you.”

Catheryne’s hand whips across his face and the shock pains him more than the slap. His mouth open and he touches his stricken face which he is sure is now red from the interaction. No one else in this entire country would have the nerve to slap him across the face but Catheryne. To be fair, he knows he deserve that and much more. He straightens up and looks at Catheryne who is shaking and fuming with anger. Water sits on the corners of her eyes, but his strong woman holds all the tears in.

“Don’t ever say that you love me ever again, Liam,” she whispers through gritted teeth. “You don’t treat people you love this way. You don’t destroy them. Now, I would really appreciate if you show yourself out.”

“Catheryne, please…” Liam begs for more time.

“Leave. Now,” she turns away from him. He can see now that he has done more than hurt her. He has crushed her spirit. He obliges her wishes and rushes out of the estate. He mounts his motorcycle and quickly puts distance between him and the horrible interaction that had just occurred.

He arrives at the palace after twenty minutes. He leaves the motorcycle in front and runs to his office. He needs to drown his misery with a lot of liquor. Upon arriving in his office, he slams the door close and quickly pours him a sizeable amount of dark liquor in a crystal glass. He sets himself down on the luxurious couch with a view of his beloved city. His heart harbors anger towards himself.

He refills his cup after quickly downing the liquid. The burn soothes him. He stares at the view of the capital at night. It’s beautiful, but it is quick to remind him of what he sacrificed and destroyed for that view. He grips the glass he holds in his hands. He gives in and releases all the tears he has been keeping at bay. He feels so tired. He feels as if he has aged a lifetime in a matter of a day.

He leans forward. His head hangs low, defeated and alone. The internal struggle continuing its rampage in his mind. The fight for duty over love destroys his heart. When he closes his eyes, all he can see is Catheryne turning away from him. Body language has made him a great diplomat. Reading hers hurt him. The pain and anguish written all over her is something that will never leave his memory knowing that he was the reason she was in that position.

He has drunk four glasses of liquor and his body feels the effects. He stands and sways himself to the balcony to look up at the stars. He closes his eyes and imagines what he could remember of his mother. What would she say, what would she think if she was here? How incredibly disappointed she will be.

Just to add to his frustration, he heard the quiet click of the door behind him. Ugh why now?

“Well, there you are, my dear husband,” Madeleine’s bubbliness sends him further down the rabbit hole. He grips the railing in fury. “Everyone wondered where you ran off to, but not too worry I was able to veer you away from a scandal. You’re welcome. Now to get to business. Since I am now queen…”

“Let me stop you there, Madeleine,” Liam whirls around and interrupts her. “You may be Cordonia’s queen, but you will never be mine. Our quarters will always be separated. The only interaction we will have is a court function. Besides that, you are nothing to me. We will only be a couple in front of the court and the press. Behind closed doors, I want nothing to do with you. Ever. Got it?” He hisses every word at her in disgust. He is also disgusted at his actions and for allowing himself to be in this predicament. Now he must live a lie.

“Whatever, Liam, I have no interest other than the business of bettering Cordonia. We can treat our relationship like a negotiation if that is what you desire, but you will have to get over Catheryne sooner or later. Our people will expect an heir one day, after all.” With that she saunters out of his office.

An heir. Oh god, that hasn’t even crossed his mind. As a regent, one of his responsibilities is to ensure the crown’s stability by producing an heir. How can he ever go through with that? His heart aches and his mind throbs with a terrible head ache. He knows he should stop drinking but it was the only way he can numb the pain. He sits back down on the couch carelessly and looks out the view of the balcony mindlessly. He thinks of Catheryne and what this night would have been like if she was the one he chose.  He definitely wouldn’t be drunk and alone right now.

He paces across his office to distract himself. He closes his eyes and groans in frustration and anguish. It’s as if someone continues to drive a dagger through his heart. He grips his glass until finally he releases all sense of mannerism and throws it at the wall. He sinks down to the floor leaning against a wall. He releases a deep sigh. He can no longer feel anything. The brokenness he had to endure this day has made him completely numb and emotionless. He breathes, but no longer living.