#minus ciri

[moonlightpirate]

Started season 3 again last night and I swear somehow I ship radskier harder than I did and I'm only two episodes in 🥰

[littlestsnicket]

title: In which ciri acquires an emotional support bard (1/5)

word count: 6k

ciri character study, focused on her developing relationships with jaskier, geralt, and yennefer; pre-season 3 fic; grief; families of choice; weird uncle jaskier

special thanks to @soymimikyu and @kuwdora for the hand holding and cheerleading and idea bouncing

excerpt:

Geralt looked Jaskier over again. “What else can’t you do without?”

“Changes of shirts and socks.” Geralt nodded towards his saddlebags to indicate he’d already thought of the items as Jaskier ticked off his requests on his fingers. “Paper, pen, a cloak would be nice—my coat isn’t that warm—and the spare lute you keep in the basement as a prize for the bards that manage not to die of exposure.”

Geralt shook his head.

“No, I didn’t really expect that to work, but you were being so agreeable, I had to try.”

Geralt squeezed Jaskier’s shoulder and, wordlessly, went back inside.

Jaskier immediately began rummaging through Geralt’s saddlebags—which Roach tolerated—until he found an apple and a knife. He sliced the apple into pieces, held one out for Roach on a carefully flat palm, and fed the rest of the pieces, one at a time, to the chocolate gelding. 

“You’ll spoil her,” Yennefer said. It was the first thing she had said all morning. 

Jaskier shrugged and petted the horse’s muzzle. “Him? It’s a gelding, so maybe not a him. Hm, in people having your balls cut off doesn’t make you not a man unless you want it to but you can’t ask a horse. Anyway, not a her. And better spoiled than mad at me.”

“You’ll have both spoiled and mad at you when you run out of treats,” Ciri said, mostly to see what Jaskier would do.

He smiled blithely at her. “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it. No reason not to enjoy the apples while we have them, isn’t that right, Fredrick?”

“That’s not…” Ciri trailed off and Jaskier looked at her quizzically. None of the Witchers would name their horse Fredrick, but Ciri didn’t know the gelding’s proper name, wasn’t even sure which of the now dead Witchers it had belonged to. She hadn’t spent enough time in the stables to learn these things but it still felt like a failure not to know.

Ciri frowned and mounted her horse, riding in tight figure eights around the courtyard. She kept an eye on Jaskier and Yennefer. They stood where Geralt had left them with their respective horses, but Jaskier made silly faces across the distance and Yennefer visibly struggled not to smile. This man was utterly unremarkable, or, more accurately, he was only remarkable in his ability to be dramatic, wordy, and irritating. He was not funny. Ciri didn’t understand why Yennefer was acting like this—like she liked him. What had he done to earn her affection? 

[on ao3]

[my-jokes-are-my-armour]

I need to find my family

This sentence made me cry when I first heard it, and still makes me emotional. Series after series and filling some blanks with the books I made myself a little headcanon about Jaskier that I'd like to share.

From the books we know very little about Jaskier's childhood except three things :

He is born noble.

He was a recalcitrant child and his professors were using a cane to try to discipline him.

He was drinking strong alcohol at school.

In the books he seems very reluctant to speak about his noble roots. And the only link that doesn't seem severed is with his cousin. In the series, his noble roots are not hidden as much, but he has the profile of someone who is running from his past and from every kind of anchors, except one : his found family.

And in the same time, he is seeking for love all the time, multiplying one night affairs, writing and singing about love in every forms, from the most vulgar to the purest.

He loves too much. He needs love too much. As if he had a void to fill in, void that he doesn't feel when he is with his found family, because he belongs.

What if his parents didn't love him, or negligated him strongly, using the educational system as proxy. Educational system that tried to make him fit in a mold for his social rank using force and intimidation. Making him reject his biological and social roots.

What if this was what settled his need to break free and never fall into the classical blue print of a family.

Like he would prefer to starve at the end of the world rather than live in a cage. Prefering the life on the roads to a life at court, as his profession predestine him. And accepting to settle only where the found family stays.

What if his childhood dug a hole in his heart, like a deep wound he then tried to heal with love, trying to find what is missing ?

What if he doesn't feel so empty when he is with Geralt and that's the reason why he loves him so deeply ? Because with him, he is enough... Not a child you hurt to shape into something he is not.

What if the found family was the family he always seeked for ?

What if the events of season 3 hurt him more than we see at first because his fragile stability has just blown away ?

What if he feels the same need to find Ciri as Geralt, minus the rage ?

What if "I need to find my family" means everything that he is ?

[tielmamon]

Burn, Bonnet Burn (TWN x OFMD AU)

At a tavern near the sea, Jaskier drops his tired self onto a bar stool after finishing his last set. His voice still hurts from belting his heart and anger out when a drunk group of maidens requested he sing 'Burn, Butcher Burn'.

He hoped and prayed he was too far from the main land that the wretched song hadn't found itsway to Skelligan shores. Apparently not far enough.

"Ale and the dinner I was promised, please. Thanks." A second later, he was given a tankard of ale and a bowl of...he's not entirely sure but he assumes it's food

"Good song." Jaskier suppresses a flinch. All he wanted was a nice quiet dinner after that particularly heartwrenching performance. In the middle of his set, he had spotted a burly man, hair so blonde you'd mistake it for white pass by the stage. He knew it wasn't him. He was probably on the other side of the continent, as far away from Jaskier as he could get. Still, his heart never calmed as he finished the rest of his set. No one had a problem with how he was practically sobbing minus the tears by the end of the song. Instead, they relished in it, ate it up like they were watching a pig be slautered for a feast. The applause was louder than usual, his coin purse significantly heavier. It was his best performance yet.

He never wanted to play like that ever again.

"Thank you" He forces a smile and turns to face the stranger, and normally Jaskier isnt one to judge a person's character at first glance, but lets just say the stranger was, infact rather strange.

An older man with wild grey hair to his shoulders, decked in full leather and buckles and, most curious of all...black messy soot around his chin, mouth and eyes. Eyes that stare back at him with a deep sadness he knew all too well. The black and broody nature of it all was too...familiar, too close to home. He could only nod and turn back to his ale, resisting the urge to touch the ache in his chest.

"You seem to know your way around heartbreak well. Someone ripped your heart our recently?" The stranger suprisingly placed a hand on his back as Jaskier promptly inhaled half of his ale into his nose. Despite the embarrassing display, the stranger did not laugh at his expense. Only a stoic, concerned expresssion on his face that just pissed Jaskier off even more.

"And who the fuck are you exactly, my good sir?" He grits through his teeth, wondering just who the fuck posseses the audacity to-

"Blackbeard. Pleased to meet you." -to b-be...the deadliest and most wanted pirate of the seven seas. Oh fuck. He promptly chokes once again, this time on his own spit.

"He-Hello, hi. Gods, really?" The stranger- the infamous Blackbeard offers a small smile and helps him through another coughing fit.

"Easy. Eat your, whatever the fuck that is. I just... wanted to talk." He takes a bite, awkardly. The stew was still a mystery, but thankfully pleasant enough to choke down. An almost shy tension forms between them, which baffled Jaskier. Blackbeard is sitting next to him, very much lacking a beard, covered in soot and looking like he's about to cry into his tankard. And he waits to talk. To...Jaskier?

"What- um, what did you want to talk about?" The older man looks down at his hands. A strange sight, seeing someone so feared look so scared. Then again, Jaskier knew first hand how big hulking figures with bigger reputations have something to hide.

"Your song..." Blackbeard looks at him with determination and a horrifying thought forms in his head. Has the pirate come for Jaskier for information on Geralt and Ciri too? Will he be tied to a chair and beaten once more? Will he be drowned instead of burned this time around?

"What about it?"

"You...why do you write songs like that?" Ed watches the bard blink slowly, practically see the sentences forming in the man's head before he speaks with a sigh.

"Well, when someone as dramatic as myself gets their heart stomped on and ripped to pieces, one tends to seek an outlet for all that frustration and sadness. Writing a heated song about them and burning helps."

"Helps...Does the pain go away? After you sing it?" The pirate fiddles with the handle of his tankard, brows furrowed. Jaskier has the strangest urge to hold the man's hand to sooth him.

"In a way. It turns the sadness into something else for a bit, something more...approachable? Something to hold, to throw, to punch..."

"To burn?" The two share a look before Jaskier chuckles into his mead, nodding.

"Yes. That too." His eyes watch the crowd of strangers in the tavern and spots the blond haired man from before. His features too soft, height too tall. Its not him but it makes his blood boil and heart ache all the same.

"The pain doesn't go away. It just gives you an opportunity to hit back, in a way." Jaskier watches the gears turn in the pirates brain, slowly digesting his words. Silence follows, or atleast the suggestion of it as they sit in a crowded tavern next to an angry ocean. A few more minutes pass and just when Jaskier rises to leave-

"Could you help me write one too?" Ed turns to the bard and pleads. Blackbeard the Pirate wouldn't be caught dead in such a state. Edward Teach, however was desperate. Edward was tired of the pain, the confusion. He needed relief from it, even just for a second. Killing didn't help. Stealing only reminded him more of Bonnet. He was out of options. The only semblace of ease he had felt was when he attempted to write about it, strangely enough.

"You want me...to help you write a song? About heartbreak?" Blackbeard nods solemly, completely fucking serious. Jaskeir being a sucker for a good story and, admitted a chance to help and feel needed replies.

"Fuck it, why not?" Let it be known that Jaskier had a type.

[sporadicboinglerstealer2000]

I'm starting the think Emhyr's plans are just bs. Right I was thinking last night about it all and pretty sure we can all agree both Emhyr and Vilgefortz plans for Ciri are like the worse out of any of the factions that want her (the lodge and elves are both shitty too but I feel like are not as bad compared to these two twits, not by much still bad) But Emhyr says he'll '...beget her a son who will beget a son.' which would not work for his plans of making Nilfgaard a powerful empire since the elder blood can only remain active in the female line, so Vilgefortz must have omitted some details there. However his plans for marrying Ciri will only speed up this process by one generation. Like if he was normal about this and was like 'this is my long lost daughter' (easy to tell cos they look near identical and Ciri has the obvious looks of her mother and grandmother so anyone who met those two women (like Queen Meve of Lyria and Rivia, Calanthes relative) could verify that) then it would either be his foretold grandchild or great-grandchild who would be the actual prophecy child who would inherit his grand empire. However if he got his way then his son and grandson would have half of the gene because they aren't women and wouldn't be able to carry the full elder blood gene, so unless it was a family of controlled incest then the power he wants would just cease to exist. (I doubt getting the Nilfgaardians behind his whole Targaryen family would go down well).

Another thing, if the plan went accordingly and Ciri was on the ship with them then he'd would of sent away Pavetta anyway, which would make it all sooo much worse because Ciri would know he was then (even in the books she notes something familiar about him which would make sense since she was 5 when he 'died' so a part of her could have some recognition). Though admittedly that probably wouldn't happen since I think Vilgefortz would've gotten rid of him and then had both Pavetta and Ciri for his own sick plans. Essentially Emhyr has justified this incest by speeding up the process by a generation because he's impatient. If he hadn't attacked Cintra and instead sent some messengers to Calanthe being like 'hey it's me, your son-in-law I'm actually an emperor and Ciri will be my heir and as such Cintra will join Nilfgaard' then there's Cintra secured. Presumedly he had the whole incest plan the whole time looking for Ciri (I assume so anyway) and only changed his mind after Geralt tore into him, Yennefer didn't want her daughter to cry, said daughter cries so he lets her go. Like he only saw reason after having it pointed out to him? Also the fact it's obvious Ciri is practically identical minus the hair and probably eyes (are his eyes described?) If the incest plot didn't exist then he could just be like 'i've searched for you my long lost daughter you're an empress' then things could've gone a little better, only thing is now Ciri may actually want to go with him (I can see Geralt and Yennefer being able to accompany here or at least allowed to live), but no and I fail to see why at least a version of this couldn't happened.

[arianaofimladris]

So Pyrkon is over again. My approach this year was different than a year ago. I had zero preparations before the con, since I worked on the cosplays in the early autumn (then switched to other hobbies).

On minus side, I was reminded again that joining a group of even vaguely familiar people from one of my fandoms, but without someone really familiar, is not something I'm comfortable with. I need someone to stick to or at least somepne to feel awkward with, so I sort of ran away after the event to "unpeople". Annoying, but well, that's how I operate.

Buuuut, on plus side, and this one was MUCH bigger.

- I got to wear three different costumes. Yennefer of Vengerberg in the updated version. My Ciri. And a variation of Idril Celebrindal.

- I attended some awesome panels and had a lot of fun.

- I went to awesome concerts, even if one of them was located in a place not meant for concerts with jumping and dancing. I understand that people want to have fun like this on a concert, but it sucks when they do that on the alleys between rows of chairs with SITTING people. I had to move muach farther away from tje sxene to be avle to see something and to escape stinky crowd standing right over me sitting. Still, once I moved, I really enjoyed the music.

- I went to a Witcher parade. Nice, even if my brain noped at some point and made me leave to unpeople.

- I met some good old friends and some that I have not seen in years.

- And the biggest surprise of this con. I wasn't aware Miranda Otto was going to be a guest this year. I managed to get both a photo with her and also a signed pic with dedication. As much as I'm not really into such stuff, this is a LOTR star we're talking about.

All in all, I'm going back home after having a really great time, with a wonderful souvenir and cool memories.

[audiobook-mike]

I personally think people overrated Cirie BB game pretty hard

Like seeing people say "She was in full control in the 1st half" well if you say so. Can I list what she did with that control?

Had multiple alliances that ultimately collapsed her and Jared's game because Jared talks too much and lies for no damn reason. Also literally forgeting who were in their alliances all the time and in front of people not in the alliance (Meme)

Targeted her own loyal allies / shields / voting block (Hisam & Red) over Cam - to which saving Cam was the ultimate reason that Jared wasted his HoH and Cam beat Jared as a Zombie to make Jury.

The alliance she was targeting (Family Style) ultimately all made it to Jury minus Reilly, whereas Cirie's major allies (Izzy, Jared, Meme?) all became targets to weaken Cirie's control (done by Cam + Cory)

So if you wanna say she had control in the 1st half, sure okay. But with that control she made mistake after mistake that ultimatly costs her allies their games and weakened her power structure and grasp over the other remaining players

[negrotti-natalie]

literally the house (minus cirie and maybe bowie cause who tf knows what is going on in her head) against jared and they still fuck it up somehow

[persephoneggsy]

second part to my sebhawke witcher au, this time ft. blackwall and vivienne, bc in my head, sebastian is pretty much the ciri of this au, just minus the magic powers. so blackwall and vivienne are his geralt and yennefer lol

long story short, Thom “the Blackwall” Rainier is a griffin school witcher who ended up with a child of destiny when he invoked the Law of Surprise (”that which you have but do not know yet”) as payment after rescuing a nobleman from a monster. Unbeknownst to him, this nobleman was royalty, and when he arrived home, he found his wife was pregnant with their third child. When the baby was born, Blackwall arrived to take him back to the witchers, though he agreed to the boy’s grandfather’s last request -- that he keep the name they gave him: Sebastian.

Meanwhile, Vivienne is a sorceress who’s worked with Blackwall on a few occasions. They mostly snipe at each other, but then Blackwall shows up with the most charming little boy, and she adores him. Vivienne’s pretty much the reason Sebastian’s still a fancy lad despite being raised by witchers (and also the reason he still wears mostly white lol).

[supercupcakecollector-love]

Witcher hot take 1. Why the wolf Witchers don't work in the show, and the hot take of why I  don't care about these changes  as much as other fans

this does have some criticism of the Netflix show but I won't be tagging it as that because I do not want to attract those 100% negative people   

I don’t like anything about how the other wolf Witchers were portrayed in the show, not just Eskel’s death but the overall toxic masculinity vibe ( the scene with the sex workers, really?)  and lack of soft moments with Ciri, unlike in the books,  Lambert and Coen were just boring and not fleshed out beyond teasing Ciri and Vesemir seemed miscast and not only written weird I did not get the fatherly vibe with him at all, not between Geralt or Ciri, It  feels really ooc that he would want more Witchers, even with the explanation they give  ( and I am someone who will defend Yennefer's actions in season two; we are getting to her next), they try but you never get the sense of comradery you get from them in the games/ books 

having a bunch of conflict in  Kaer Morhen is like having a scene in Fellowship of the Ring where there are murders in the shire in the beginning, this place  is supposed to be a contrast to all the horrors the characters will encounter in the future 

That being said, it doesn’t “ruin things”  going forward for me for a few reasons, Contrary to what you may think from the sheer amount of fanfic of them, the other wolf Witchers don’t have that big a role in the story, in fact, other than Coen showing up briefly in the final battle in LotL I don't think they show up past Blood of Elves in any big, important way 

Secondly , a good part of their characterization and backstory come from the games, (Eskel's scar and child surprise, Lambert's expanded backstory with his father and with Aiden, Vesemir`s encounter with the vampires and “reputation” in his younger years), and just the fact that they were portrayed so perfectly in the games already, I already have an amazing Interactive audio-visual representation of these characters, and hundreds of incredible fanfictions of them I feel like I already got  the best version of these characters and with the remake of the first Witcher game, I'm going to get even more of them 

in contrast, I will be mad and might drop the show if they screw up the hanza as badly as the wolf witchers because they ( minus Regis and Dandelion, who are fairly different from their book counterparts ) were not in the games,  and their isn't much fanfiction the hanza and they play a huge part in the story going forward  

[thebb20robot]

I'm watching Claim to Fame S2 with my mom and the scheming going on is so much more compelling than 75% of what BB25 minus Cirie has given

[volfoss]

I really hope it'll get better as the game goes on (as I'm pretty early on) but the way the Witcher 3 is treating ciri as an adult versus geralt feels weird to me 👍 like she's got a full face of makeup practically and a fantasy bra. I wish I was fucking joking like they put her in a (sheer wet white :/) blouse with it being torn open in the middle to reveal a super duper supportive bra (this is sarcasm it's like. Barely fucking covering or holding anything.). Now obviously I do NOT expect a fantasy game to be realistic with undergarments but to pretty much have the clothing decisions reflect modern bras but again only for ciri (so far. Again I am not far into this but her character design OHHH they did some shit with her in a bad way!!). Like this isn't even offering structure or anything (her bra strap (which of course is revealed because her shirt is slipped to the side enough to show that) is maybe a half inch thick) and I again do not expect them to keep the historical accuracy but it's so clear it's just for objectification. Not even to go into the like. Fact her shirt is cropped (which so far I have not seen with geralt but again early on 👍) and cropped enough that it pairs so good with the skinny jeans so that playing in 3rd person is so clearly just catering to players that are objectifying her. Like the fact that she has literally no armor on in this first appearance (minus a. Leather corset because of fucking course they did) and it's just so clear that the player base really does not seem to respect her (as in I was looking for armor mods and the countless amount of mods that were just like ok she's tits out and in a tiny bikini bottom. Nothing of hey here's some cool armor for her ^-^ which is all they have for geralt). Not even to get into her heeled boots which like. Are so fucking impractical I'm so sorry but you want her to be running and fighting when she is having to be in heels. It's um 👍 very weird and offputting to me because they're giving her sweet character moments (again very early on but seeing her in the bloody Baron quest line was so frustrating) and then are like oh yeah we are going to make her so sexualized and so perfectly polished pretty girl despite having fallen into a mud puddle moments before. She plays so so much like they're trying to make her so dainty and feminine like. She's supposed to be strong and when you see this kid tell her that oh she's stronger than this kids dad for killing all these wolves, and then you see her toothpick arms. And it's like god idk I do not expect her to play the same as geralt (since he's 6 ft+ and built like a fridge in this game) but she plays so like??? In the way that it doesn't feel natural with her movements because there's so much focus on look how she's sashaying as she walks (wish I was joking 😞 but she resembles that one batman video game sashay gif) and it's idk. It's very weird to me and I hope it gets better but for rn I'm like honestly frustrated w it 👍

[astaldis]

Season 2 minus the Eskel scenes

For @bawdybean

But maybe others who love book/game Eskel, haven’t watched season 2 yet because they don’t want to see the Eskel rubbish there, are interested in what to skip in S2, too?

Hope I got everything (the seconds are not very exact though). If I missed something or got something wrong, please correct me!

Episode 1: Safe to watch, no Eskel here

Episode 2: 

1. Best to stop after Coen says: “Here’s to another winter, together.” (9:00) and start again at 10:55 (after the Witcher logo)

2. Stop after Vesemir: “What if your princess is more than you bargained for?” Geralt: “I know that already.” (at 13:27) and start watching again at 14:30

3. Stop after Ciri: “What’s that?” Geralt: “Stay here.” Ciri: “You know, in Cintra I went to parties-” Geralt: “Cirilla.” (21:30) Start again at 25:15.

4. Stop after Vesemir says to Ciri: “It’s hard to do when I don’t know who I’m protecting. Or what I’m protecting her from.” Start again at 31:35.

5. Stop after Geralt: “But you protected us anyway.” Vesemir: “No. I taught you how to fend for yourselves. “(34:35). Start again at 37:00.

6. Stop after Voleth Meir says to Yennefer: “You will beg me to take it from you. And I will.” (43:00) Start again at 49:20.

7. Stop after Fringilla says “If she’s really that evil, why did she let you go?” (50:28). Start again at 52:00.

Episode 3:

1. Stop after Geralt says: “When you finish this, get some rest, Ciri.” (2:50) Start again at 6:41.

2. Stop after Lambert says to Ciri: “Still wanna be a Witcher?” (14:40). Start again at 17:00.

Hope you’ll find a way how this can work. Maybe somebody who has already seen the whole thing or does not care much about Eskel can skip the scenes forward for you? Good luck, hope this helps!

[tehkuning]

2

Beberapa hari yang lalu saya menonton podcast nya Pak Gita bersama Dr. Fahrudin Faiz dgn judul Akal Budi untuk tidak disia-siakan, seperti menambah insight baru; as we know Fahrudin Faiz adalah dosen filsafat, bahwa Ilmu filsafat adalah ilmu kritis; beliau menjelaskan bahwa ngaji itu berasal dari kata Aji yang artinya kemuliaan, maka Ngaji itu sebenarnya Menuju Aji (Kemuliaan);meningkatkan kualitas diri. Mereka juga membahas mengenai ciri people nowdays yang salahsatunya Social skill yang minus, aku pun juga merasakan, banyak dari generasi muda seperti kurang pas untuk menempatkan dirinya dalam berinteraksi;kemudian cenderung ingin yang serba instant hehehehe, kayak nyari penghasilan dengan cara-cara instant menggunakan platform media sosial tertentu hehehehe, ya tidak salah sih, tapiiii..

closing statement dari beliau,gini

Boleh mengikuti arus tapi jangan tenggelam, harus tetap punya idealisme (ide-ide) yang ingin ditegakkan, diperjuangkan, yang ingin disemai

[nataliescatorccio]

In the books Triss used magic to seduce him, it was borderline rape so if it was differently written here good thing it was cut. About Milva/Geralt at her original tweets introducing the characters Lauren said she had a crush on Geralt (there she also said that eskel is the beating heart of Kaer Morhen so things change) so who knows? Anything is possible now. We'll see when we'll see. It might turn good and s2 might be a glitch to those who didn't enjoy it and the example forward to those who did. We'll see soon. (another anon, I've read the books)

yep! i am really glad they've adjusted that relationship from the books, triss is essentially obsessed with geralt in the books and it was always an incredibly weird dynamic. from what they've said about the scene originally, i don't believe it would have been anything like that at all, but i still don't think it would have been fair to either character as they were both trying to process a lot of trauma at that time. supposedly in the witcher universe every woman has a crush on geralt, minus ciri because that'd be creepy, but that doesn't necessarily develop into anything. as you say, let's try and go into season 3 with an open mind and not prejudge it based on season 2!

[arianaofimladris]

Season three thoughts&rant

I more or less watched the third season of Netflix’s The Witcher.

What I liked:

- Geralt with a sword. His fight scenes are at least pleasurable to look at, even if in a wider picture that fighting makes no sense. I no longer have any expectations towards this show, I mainly wanted to watch Cavill as Geralt while I could.

- Geralt’s fight with Vilgefortz. It was alright for the series standards. It is one of my favorite moments in the saga and while they thoroughly butchered the whole Thanned part, that fight was ok.

- Geralt and Ciri were alright, at least until any fighting happened. I do NOT buy Geralt standing idly by while he lets Ciri take the initiative in a fight. Not with the monster on the boat and certainly not with Cahir. But other than that, they did have a few nice moments.

- The actress who plays Tissaia. I did believe Tissaia is one of the oldest of the mages, that she is respected and that she is powerful. The only idiotic drawback being her romance with Vilgefortz, but the actress really shines in that role and if I’m to remember anyone from that show except Geralt, it’s her.

- The final fight scene in the tavern with Ciri meeting the Rats and with Percival music during the fight. This was actually the only moment in this season when I felt like I was watching a Witcher adaptation, to the point that I felt like this scene came from a completely different series than the rest of this crap. Which left me sad in the end, because this is how this show could have looked like if the scriptwriters bothered to actually adapt the books. There were changes, yes, I know, but I actually FELT like I was watching the Witcher. That scene, along with the Renfri tale from season 1, are for me  the best adaptation and if the whole series had kept such quality/level/accuracy, I would have been happy.

- Ciri on the desert. Ok, with one huge BUT. I was genuinely surprised to see that subplot quite accurately adapted, with all the little details like Ciri licking the cream she had, or her going the wrong way and returning to the start point. The pace was slower, but I enjoyed it. Freya Allan gives much better impression when she’s not on screen next to Yennefer (because she looks older than Anya). Still looks a decade too old for Ciri, but at least it’s not that obvious when she’s alone on screen.

BUT – I really disliked there the visions part, I hoped to never see Netflix Calanthe or Pavetta again. I scrolled past most of that. It was boring, too long and unnecessary. Also I saw a lot of people complaining about this episode and I think it could have been way better if it was edited in a different way. Those desert scenes, which are, I agree, quite boring in the end, could have been entwined with another subplot. Like Geralt in Brokilon. We would get some news about both characters without either plot being too long and slow. And let’s be honest, Geralt in Brokilon, lying stiff, is not too action-packed either. I think the filming material of the desert part was good (minus the shitty visions) and different editing would have helped a lot.

- The Milva actress is like a decade too old for Milva and also very tiny for a nicely looking, but well built and muscled young woman living among the dryads, but at least her dynamics with Geralt start on the right ground. If I were to point one woman in the whole season whom I did not dislike, it would be her.

General impressions:

- Once again, a show that requires the suspension of brain instead of the suspension of disbelief.

- Garbage scriptwriting. And I’m not even talking about the book accuracy – that ship had sailed loooong time ago.  I’m talking about writing dialogues that make you cringe every three minutes. I’m talking about writing and constructing scenes in a way that makes the characters act like complete idiots. There were so many scenes where I could come up with at least five different solutions on spot, tiny changes easily incorporated so that the characters’ behaviour would make sense.

- Destiny as deus ex machina. This is exactly the opposite to the books. All the bullshitting about people linked by destiny always finding each other. This is exactly what Sapkowski did not write. Destiny is not enough. You need something more. The “more” being character’s conscious decision to act or inact. Geralt’s and Yennefer’s fates were somehow bound by Geralt’s wish, but it didn’t magically made them a couple. Without effort from both parts, their relation kept falling apart (Because Geralt would walk away. Because Yennefer was afraid to open up and allow herself to get involved. You name it.). Same goes with Ciri.

- Soap opera drama. God, this is a dirty fantasy world, why do we get all these teary dialogues with cheap emotional play. Or the big inspirational speeches that look ridiculous. And don’t get me wrong, motivational speech, when delivered right, will make a huge impression and get the right result. Remember Aragorn before the battle at Minas Tirith, talking to the Rohirrim? But Yennefer returning from her banishment, bullshitting before the other mages about how they have to stand together, blah blah blah? I know, the show desperately wants to create her as the best, the smartest, the one who takes charge, whatever. Sorry, it’s not working.

-  I watched/listened to the series in English and my cringe tolerance in English is higher, but gosh, it was hard even there. I wonder how these dialogues sound to native English speaker who actually uses their brain while watching. Because when I heard/read bits of these dialogues in Polish, that surely brought out another level of cringe.

- I feel like you could cut off half (if not more) of the first five episodes and the story would lose virtually nothing important.

- The sex/kink scenes were, erm, boring is a mild word to describe them. So you don’t actually show any intimacy between the two main characters, but you waste screentime for Filippa and whoever just for the sake of ticking another checklist.

- I would love to see sth like “season three by characters screen time”, just to know how many minutes of Geralt we got in these eight episodes. I’m left with an impression that he was hardly there.

 The rest of rant in details

- Ciri the future queen, the saviour, the one who will unite them all. Hi the most generic idea in a fantasy universe that contradicts most of the typical, generic ideas.

- They had absolutely no idea what to do with Geralt in this season. They make him act like an idiot and not killing Rience in the first episode, so that he has a purpose in the next three, only to let him kill Rience in episode 6 ( which takes a powerful moment later on from Ciri, who kills Rience in the books). Or they make him act like an idiot and putting his sword away when he’s literally waiting for a monster to attack.

- Episode 6 deserves an entire post probably, but let’s put it here. On one hand, it was the only episode of that season which I did not scroll. On the other, this (along with the fifth one) was the one I paused out of cringe most often. It was better than the previous five in terms of “something is finally going on there”, but then if you didn’t kill your brain cells before, it was a damn hard thing to watch. I’m going to ignore the mages vs elves fight. It was hilariously bad with cheap effects. Filavandrel blowing right into Francesca’s face was too grotesque not to laugh out loud and yes, I am aware that was not intended as such. Sorry.

Tissaia had her “big” moment, but all I could think of was “oh, so she unleashed the eels”. Well done, netflix.

And here comes the “fuck logic” part. All these scenes on the fields – the look like they are taking place MILES away from Thanned. And yet our characters run back and forth like it was 100m. Sorry, brain cells still working. Then we get our trio meeting in the middle of nowhere because Reasons and they have the perfect opportunity to just get the hell away. But no, here comes the soap opera in its full glory of teary speeches and Yennefer decides she needs to go back (miles away, but why would she care). I’m not buying it. Her priority should be Ciri. Since Rience had just teleported there, she should have been able to open a portal ANYWHERE and just send Geralt and Ciri away. But no, because it’s netflix.

Then comes the Powerful Girl netflix trope and when Cahir catches up with Geralt and Ciri (were they just standing on that field so he could go all the way after them?). Geralt does not know what his intentions are. He doesn’t know how good a soldier he is. And yet he lets Ciri charge madly at him and stays SEVERAL METERS away. Yeah, cool, I do see what the scriptwriters wanted here, let’s let Ciri have that fight. So maybe, idk, get Geralt involved with half a dozen of elves in the meantime to justify why Ciri is fighting Cahir? But no, he just stands aside. If Cahir wanted to kill Ciri, if he got the best of her, there was no way Geralt could have intervened in time. A+ parenting. And again this is just making Geralt an idiot. I don’t like it.

- Lydia. Why did they turn someone who was most probably a servant and also unhappily in love with Vilgefortz, a victim, into his willing accomplice and Rience’s master. I should not be happy that she died, but she was absolutely awful in the series.

 - Except for Tissaia (who acts mature and in a way that demands respect) and Sabrina (who looks pretty and dresses on the verge of scandalous but in a stylish way), the other sorceresses could easily blend in with any other women on screen and I wouldn’t be able to tell they are supposed to be sorceresses. You could switch Keira with Annika or Vespula and there would be literally no difference. I have some trouble with Filippa, because she was usually alone on the screen and thus recognisable as a sorceress, but somehow, depending on what she was wearing and how her hair was styled, she looked 30 or 50. I literally have no idea why, but she could look pretty and young in one outfit/hairdo, and then she would look way older and uglier. It’s confusing.

- This story, in general, lacks believable relations. Normal, casual relations. Even in the background or whatever. The only one I can think of in this season is Annika and that werewolf (or Zola and Yurga in the first season).

There is Filippa and Dijkstra and while the actors give a good performance, what the hell was that – first with the whipping for literally no purpose (yeah, except the obvious American “the powerful woman” trope) and then with drunken Dijkstra coming to Filippa and begging her to kill and blame him for the failure. What. the. hell. was. that. Why were they not portrayed as a powerful duo who has (or had) some kind of romantic relationship, but first of all who come as equal partners in the plotting. There was also this subplot of Filippa and that blond assassin with hideous haircut and her only purpose was to kill and show that Filippa fucks women. Cool. It’s not like later on there is an actual relationship between Filippa and Triss.

There is the fuckin F girlboss duo (Francesca and Fringilla) I had hoped to never see again after season two, yet here we go again. Bleh.

We get Jaskier and Vespula and Jaskier is discussing his love interests while laying in bed of his other lover. Believable as hell.

There is Geralt and Jaskier and while in the last two episodes I finally began to see the friendship between the two of them, the friendship I should have seen in the past two seasons as well – with Jaskier’s creation this series goes, I can’t be sure of how Jaskier sees that friendship. I really, really hate it because this was probably the deepest friendship this whole universe gives us, the kind of “against all odds” friendship. I wouldn’t want Jaskier to have any other thoughts towards Geralt.

- Just please pack Yennefer into a tiny figurine and store her somewhere for the next season. I know that the showrunner wants to have a show about women, but I’m tired of seeing this imposter of Yennefer being the acting factor of everything. Yennefer taking charge of the sorceresses? Yennefer funding the Lodge? Just pack her and store her.

- I’m not even going to bring up the CGI or the costumes. The first I want to forget, the latter I have already forgotten. There wasn’t a single outfit that caught my attention in a good way, something I would want to be inspired with.

I’m aware no one is going to read this long a post, but I needed to spill it out. In the end it’s sad to see two scenes that could have come from a decent book adaptation among a shitload of crap.