#mind vs body
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flashback
the worst thing is when i am physically back in the past from one moment to the next and my mind tells me "that's not real" and my body shouts "i don't give a shit".
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I finally beat Cyberpunk 2077 last night and I have an immense craving for more dystopian synthwave in my life.
It took me a while to beat because I had to take a break with how much I lost myself to immersion. I love the first person storytelling aspect, little to no cinematic cutscenes, you're always right there, as V, making your legend known in Night City, not just watching. Definitely gonna have to replay at some point. Shit just resonates just right with me. My cravings for bittersweet storytelling need more.
I can't quite put my thoughts into words, but Cyberpunk 2077 has to be one of my top favorites now.
#personal#cyberpunk is really shaping my mindset#helping me with identity issues#mind vs body#mind vs mind#body vs body#you vs you above all else#and youre stronger than you think
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Most days ...
#mood diary#cyclothymia#mood disorders#mental health#documenting life#low mood#mind vs body#my head huuuurts#give my brain a break
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Mind Vs Body
My house is so untidy, my brain feels messy like my house. I can't think straight through this mess. Washing everywhere makes my brain feel so cluttered and fuzzy it's making me feel anxious. My brain wants me to clean so I can relax but my body says no there's not enough energy in you to do it.
#mood diary#cyclothymia#mood disorders#mental health#low mood#anxious#clean furry#untidy#dead inside#busy mind#mind vs body#day to day#day to day struggle#up or down#feeling unbalanced#clean#house cleaning#documenting life#clutter#fuzzy brain#busy brain#anxiety#mum life#cyclothymic disorder#bipolar 3#bipolar spectrum
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My less popular opinion (and what I believe to be implied by the art in Lost Days) is that rather than waking up in a fully grown body Jason didn’t actually complete his puberty until after his Lazarus pit dip while he was on his murder tour. Imagine you’re tied up in a basement in Berlin getting interrogated by a teenager and his voice is cracking the entire time and if you laugh he’s going to shoot you
#Late puberty Jason truthers rise#Egon calling up Talia like ‘did you send me a middle schooler what is this’. ‘He’s technically high school aged actually’#he would’ve been like 18 when he finally regained consciousness but the way he’s drawn could easily be mistaken for 15#I know people love the body dysmorphia angst of Jason waking up big but I offer you this: Jason wakes up looking basically the same to a#world that has moved on without him and is unrecognizable. His death/injuries stunted him he existed for years in a state of suspension#while the world passed him by. He was on pause while everyone kept moving on and he didn’t get unpaused until the Lazarus pit and he has#to scramble to catch up. He’s actually 18 but the last thing he remembers is being 15 and his body reflects this state#and then once his mind is finally back online puberty hits him like a truck. Just look at the difference between how Jason is drawn#immediately after his dip in the Lazarus pit vs the end of lost days when his training arc is over#It implies it could’ve been multiple years but in order to fit with the timeline of other comics I personally don’t think it#would’ve been that long. I think he just sprouted up like a weed#Jason Todd#dc#I think Jason is technically still growing by the time he’s red hood. In my personal mindscape he doesn’t reach his peak buffness/height#he’s like 21 and he’s 19 in utrh#Sorry for my 1538283th post about red hood lost days I’m obsessed with his little fucked up coming of age story#Red hood lost days
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danmarch 🐉💎
#honkai star rail#dan heng#march 7th#danmarch#fanart#hsr#what else do i tag. i have no idea#anyway. im breaking my VERY LONG oc art streak to post my one(1) contribution to star rail#i care them very much#ive been playing this game so religiously and they have not left my team#tragic past(emo) vs tragic past(girly pop)#theres NO WAY with marchs very teenage girl mind that she does not have a crush on the hot cool mysterious yet caring dragon guy#who stays in the room right next to her#and the fact that he teases her so much........#the whole ass belabog quest he throws in little harmless march roasts every so often#he fucking CARE her#i bets shes like a filipino mom with that camera. every oppertunity (picture!!!!)#and dan heng gets dragged into it#he is honing his photography skills against his will#any nice place? shes like (lemme pose can you get a photo of me?)#dan heng just sighs#they bond over silently judging stelle rummaging through the garbage#cast each other that best friend glance as half her body is sticking out of a trash bin#i like to think you see them hanging out on the train together#with dan heng reading some obscure 8th century book on civilization pattern and development#and march is humming and putting stickers and aesthetic shit in her scrapbook#taping a piece of antimatter legion loot in the middle of a page#and with bubbly handwriting (we beat some bad guys today!!! <333 so fun!!)
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"yeah i've got the lives to spare."
but have you got the mind?
#the suckening#the suckening spoilers#emizel tucker#art#jrwi fanart#always thinking about how much he can't lose his body vs how much of his mind he's given up#who needs taxes anyway
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his work motto prolly hhhhf (the "fuck amygdala, fuck azai" silently swings in his tone)
#saran; watching his baby project gone to shit after his death thanks to azai: fuck this and fuck that and fuck you specially#the true founder/boss decides on his own and he chooses mercy!! no more report punishments!!!!#amygdala stuff#also shows azai and saran many differences even if its just azais will being acted out through the ppl working for him right there#(the superior wanting vika to rewrite the entire report again and again and again)#azai who believes in strict punishments to get what he wants as fast as possible and make the ppl “below him” pay for their mistakes;#pay for not being what he wants (like saran had to pay with his life)#vs saran who believes in gentle discipline without pressure on the mind or body or putting himself in a higher position of power#his usual approach is to help vika without interfering or doing the work for him so he gets to learn and do things his own but#right there hes doing vikas punishment bc he doesnt see the purpose of it. it only leads to vika making more mistakes out of mental fatigue#the only purpose is to humiliate him and punish him for things he has little to no control over#in a bigger sense; saran wont allow azai to shape vika into something HE wants with punishments and force#wip#tbd#this turned into such a ramble oof
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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Achilles vs Hector
What most people think their battle music sounds like: epic, heavy, heroic
What I imagined it sound like:
youtube
#greek mythology#tagamemnon#the iliad#homeric epics#homeric poems#achilles#hector#hector of troy#achilles vs hector#memes#sad memes#homers iliad#hector vs achilles#their battle music is tragic sad and heartbreaking#change my mind#random post#thoughts from my brain#thoughts from the void#food for thought#avatar atla#azula vs zuko#Youtube#sad battle music#the final edgy notes would be the madness setting in and the ultimate revenge of desecrating the body#oh my gosh imagine it all in slow motion!#close ups to their faces...their fear...their fury and their tears...
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the best thing about iron man comics is that at some point every writer goes “we need to break all of tony stark’s bones” “he needs to get as close to death as we can get him” “we need to INJURE tony stark” like the tragedy and the high drama is so baked into the dna of this character that even writers who understand nothing about tony stark still understand this. it’s maybe the one consistent thing about iron man books through the years: that man’s body is going to be put through The Wringer. through Five Wringers
#and when I say ‘the best thing about iron man comics’ I mean ‘IM IN PAIN’ but yknow#but it really actually IS an important thing about the identity of an iron man story#it very much has always been a story about a man vs his own body#and also a story about LOTS of other things but this is a very consistent and very early-established one#man vs his body man vs the limitations of his body man vs the breakability of his body#man vs the fragility of the mind and what that then does to the body#i should be asleep#iron man comics#kay’s comic conversations
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Mumscarian or gempearl maybe?
TW: (*Implied) *Unconsensual Body Modification, Mushroom Horror, Mind Control, and Imprisonment. Viewer discretion is advised.
@scottsmajorshipbracket
"Mr. Jumbo."
The Mayor's voice was as silken as Jellie's fur as the man stroked his cat's pelt in a way reminiscent of a Disney supervillain, which would have been concerning if it weren't for the fact this was of-the-norm (Scar had a flair for theatrics), swivel chair faced away from Mumbo as he greeted him with a simple,
"Come in."
After Mumbo's own mayor campaign had fallen to shambles, he had made the wise decision to stay out of politics, but how could he resist joining in after XB had told him stories of the Mycelium Resistance’s grand vaults? A promise, which of course, fell through horrifically - when the Leader of Vaults had no more vaults left the lead, he felt it was only fair to enact rueful vengeance against the Resistance for their crimes against vaults by joining their arch-enemies, H.E.P.
Really, all he’d done so far for the faction was build a Tunnel Borer, which — despite Scar praising him relentlessly for the machine’s ingeniousness — really wasn’t all that much. He'd hardly been wholly devoted to either faction, but when Scar had called him into his office, he felt it was his duty to oblige. Even if he was quite a distant member of the Hermitcraft Environmental Protection organization, he still was one, regardlessly! And he'd rather not get on the Mayor of the Shopping District's bad side. He still had hopes that ODEA could make a comeback.
"Reporting for duty, uh... Mister Mayor, sir!" That was how he was supposed to be referred to, right? Should Mumbo be calling him 'His Majesty' instead? No, certainly not, that defintely wasn't the correct terminology for a mayor. Though, Scar did have a throne, so... GAH, this was all quite confusing! This was why he stayed out of politics!
Scar laughed. It wasn't his usual laugh. It wasn't filled with as much buoyance, or airness, no, it was more stiff. Almost stifled.
"Oh, Mumbo..." Even through his catatonic tone, a whisp of fondness slipped into his tone, the hint of warmth a direct opposition to the spike of cold that crept up Mumbo's spine at his next words:
"I'm not the Mayor."
Scar spun around in his chair.
And Mumbo could see that it wasn't Scar at all.
Not anymore.
No, violaceous mycelium had spread across his face like a mold, the purple fungus having enveloped his features, toadstools growing out of his skin like an infection. His expression was as blank as a puppet's - and the voice that came out of his throat was not his own. It was hers. Scar was nothing but a voicebox.
"The Mayor has been quite a nuisance... He rid the land of its natural mycelium. And, so, it was only fair that his punishment for removing the mycelium from the it's home meant he would become it's new home."
Mumbo ran for the door. Locked. No, rather, a sticky mold had found it's way into the keyhole, jamming it from the inside. Trapping him inside.
"As for you? Well, you betrayed me. And for what...? A vault. Well, if you like vaults so much, dear, be my guest. You can spend the rest of your life in one."
Mumbo didn't even have time to scream before he heard the sound of a piston and saw the blocks vanish from underneath him. He gasped, scrabbling to cling onto the last block, feet dangling over the edge as his fingertips dug into the carpet's floor. Dug into his last semblance of freedom.
"Don't worry, darling," Scar's puppetered shell cupped Mumbo's face lovingly as he hung over the edge, other hand intertwining their fingertips together. The same fingertips that were the only thing keeping him from falling into whatever prison lay beneath his feet.
"I'll be sure to visit. I'd never let you rot."
A smile that was not Scar's own spread across his face. Mumbo felt his fingers slipping.
"I'd only let you decay."
And then... he fell.
#hermitcraft#mumscarian#hermitcraft season 7#hermitfic#mumbo jumbo#grian#goodtimeswithscar#hermitcraft s7#hermitcraft fanfic#hc s7#mother spore#mycelium resistance#mycelium resistance vs hep#tw mind control#tw unconsentual body modification#tw imprisonment#tw mushroom horror#writing#。⋆𓋼𓍊 【 「 ➤ MOTHER KNOWS BEST~.ᐟ 」 】 𓍊𓋼⋆。°
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It's not that big of a deal but I do wonder why they didn't change jayce's design post his silent hill experience lol. That man was in that cave long enough for his shattered bones to heal enough that he could not only put weight on it but also climb out (even if he did do it in increments, that cave was deep how he didn't die on impact when he fell is straight up magic lol)
All he had to eat were those small creatures, he's lucky he didn't get scurvy, yet he comes out of it with the same physique from when he fell in minus the injured leg. AND he barely rests when he gets back! He immediately goes to fulfil his promise and then there's a big fight and I assume after the fight he was able to rest and eat actual food. He didn't even have someone look at his leg and give him a better brace. Jayce babe you've been thru the horrors intimately, please take a moment to rest and heal 🙏
That man's body would lose weight and muscle and he should have had PTSD which I think they do show, his glitches is partly PTSD and partly cuz he can tell when magic/the arcane is near.
Fanfic authors I beg on my knees for some jayce angst that's a bit more realistic than what arcane gave us 🙏
#arcane#jayce talis#arcane jayce#this isnt a hate post just an observation#i wonder why they didnt change his appearance past the leg and beard and hair cuz theyre usually very good with changing a character's#appearance to visually show the deterioration or the opposite of that happening to a character#like victor looks different once his illness starts to get worse#pretty sure jinx also looks a bit different while she was healing with isha vs when she was with silco or going thru the horrors of her mind#i can only hope we get the accurate portryal of what survival in a post apocalypse does to a person and their body thru fanfic#fanfic writers yall are my saviour please feed us jayce angst lovers
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I dont think some people understand how truly awful and hellish withdrawals from some psych medications are.
#I feel like many many people see it as an overreaction when in reality someone actually feels like they are dying from wds#resent the fact that SO many doctors just prescribe shit all over the place nonstop without explaining the full risks n side effects#it’s scary as fuck honestly#I cannot tell y’all how many meds I have been put on that made me feel worse#or how many times I’ve ran out and not been able to pay for the shit#resulting in an absolute living fucking hell that does not let up until taking the substance again#meds are tricky.. it’s hard to have a definitive opinion in either direction (anti vs pro medication) because each individual is unique#sometimes meds save people’s lives#sometimes they make people suicidal#sometimes they cause complications that literally kill people#sometimes they’re exactly what someone needed to be okay#you just can’t generalize and say statements like ALL MEDS ARE BAD because that simply isn’t true#and you can’t assume everyone’s body/mind will react to a certain medication the same way yours did#oops#accidentally did a tag rant#rant#medical#psychiatry#medication#withdrawal#withdrawals#mental illness#mental health#psych meds#psych medications#medications#prescription medication#prescription medications#american healthcare#healthcare
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I'm strapping on my clown shoes to say a thing I really appreciate about Rolin's interviews and the ways he talks about responsibility and accountability in the context of iwtv is that it feels, to me, focused on the idea that people who have been marginalized and pushed into corners are still people, making choices. and an essential part of personhood (and I would say with respect to Claudia and Armand in particular also adulthood) is the dignity of having the agency behind those choices respected and acknowledged. Including when those choices are harmful or selfish or shortsighted. and I think this is such a delicate area because it's so easy to cross the line into victim blaming and bootstraps but if they can stick the landing I will appreciate it so much.
#and i have mixed feelings about rolin & his claudia takes but this season HAS been excellent and he did have the claudeline vision#like i'm genuinely so impressed by how they thread that needle in terms of claudia's body vs. her mind and how madeline perceives her as#an answer to who is going to love me?#someone who knows you. someone who sees all of you. perhaps someone who is deeply alienated from the social consensus who understands what#it feels like to be alone and alien and unwanted#when is the monster not a monster. not when you love it. when you understand the monster.#;_________________;#he can still let me down. there's time. however the tale has seduced me#press says iwtv#interview with the vampire
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When you're listening to the very first Bibi Blocksberg Hörspiel ever made ("Hexen gibt es doch" from 1980), and there's this exchange:
Narrator: "And only women can become witches. It's always been that way." Barbara Blocksberg: "And it's always going to stay that way, Boris." Boris Blocksberg: "But mom, if you magic me into a girl, then I could become a witch, right?" Barbara: "No Boris, then you'd only look like a girl. But your soul would be a boy, and you still couldn't do magic."
So here we have the very first Bibi Blocksberg episode ever, from 1980(!!!), explicitly making a difference between physical sex and "what gender your soul is", and clarifying that the latter is what matters for their "only women can do magic" rule.
WE STAN.
#Bibi Blocksberg#Elfie Donnelly#Kiddinx#German stuff#German culture#Elfie Donnelly really said 'Yes of course trans women are women and therefore can be witches' in 1980#(Before you tell me - yes I know Ms Donnelly most likely didn't have trans people in mind when writing this exchange and probably just#needed a convenient explanation for why Boris really can't become a witch#but I still find this exchange and that they're making a distinctinon at all between what gender your 'body' vs your 'soul' is#very progressive for 1980 and I'm pleasantly surprised rn)
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