#might just be a little screwy lmao

[ofswordsandpens]

the chalice of the gods becomes objectively funnier if you head canon that percy and annabeth only stay at New Rome for a single semester before realizing its batshit insane there and running for the hills

[arcplaysgames]

the plant's plastic, isn't it

yeah the plant is plastic

can't a boy and his cat just have a fucking summer vacation without being locked in a dream panopticon

its nice to see you girl but where the fuck is igor, in my recollection when igor has not been around, shit has been Fucked.

(I assume they couldn't get the VA for this gig, but also: i love Igor? yeah.)

It's fucking Zuckerberg, Reverie, come on. You shouldn't have installed that spyware shit on your phone!!!!

i'm gonna be real, the textures are NOT fantastic in this game, lmao. I am gonna peek at settings later. the aliases need some more anti juice.

there's a statue there?????

/googles

oh huh i.......... never noticed that. i just noticed the pretty trees. whoops. i'm a bad tourist.

Rather than directing us where we need to go to get the camping shit, the shitty AI is like "hey INSTEAD I am going to direct you to an idol event nearby" this thing is atrocious and we should uninstall it and go back to mapquest

also, I have made an Executive Decision. I am resetting my emotions on Ryuji to zero. I am taking my hatred and ire and all the times he made me uncomfortable as the player of the video game, and I'm putting them all into a box and putting those emotions away. I am going to give Ryuji Persona5Strikers another shot to not be a contemptuous little shitheel I want to eject from the story.

Mostly because his voice actor is doing such good work and I would like to like Ryuji.

But if he dehumanizes or sidelines Morgana, the deal is off, okay? Okay.

ANYWAY, Ryuji is like, hyped for this instagram girl.

Reverie only hangs out in coffee shops that have oat milk and attends shows for bands you've never heard of, he doesn't care about influencers.

OH WOW OKAY

Alice Hiiragi.... Hiiragi......... why the fuck is that familiar..............

oh, Hiiragi was the Enka singer who was married to Namatame in Persona 4 before the scandal went down. I wonder if that's relevant or just a coincidence.

oh okay so something screwy is going on and she's going to, like, kidnap all the people who have cards, or something? is she the white rabbit?

lmao no she actually references the white rabbit later. okay. i DO like her theme and vibe a whole lot, even if she is giving heavy Acid Trip Pastel Tim Burton Bad Guy energy. But Wonderland is honestly a very cool foundation for a neat villain, so I'm cool with that.

thanks, they're fake so everyone thinks i'm a soft boy when really i'm more punk rock than iggy pop at a ramones concert. hi.

I appreciate the consistency, Morgana, lmao.

uh "Keyword"?????

oh my god EMMA is just a reskinned Metanav fffffff

YOU KNOW WHAT reverie i am blaming you for this. You should have informed Morgana that you had a dream in the Velvet Room, since Morgana literally was born there and it might've clued him in to "oh hey maybe shit is going down" instead of being blissfully oblivious in vakittycation mode like a chump.

huh the anime cutscenes look way better in this game than in P5R actually. dunno why.

BUT YEP IT SEEMS ALICE HAS A PALACE. the Cognitive World is back.

oh okay that seems bad. so everyone who friended Alice with the EMMAnav is getting their hearts torn out???? what does that mean exactly? it seems bad. people need their hearts or weird shit happens, either Apathy Syndrome or having their cognition rebooted like in P5.

I am Concerned.

oh my god what is Happening there is so much on my screen right now

i think i might be bad at this oh dear

the first move Reverie learns is a pole dance, though, so I'm pretty psyched for that. maybe this will be the game where Reverie finally gets to follow his dreams and wear a skirt.

everyone is off their game at being a Thief i see

me IRL out loud: oh my god i love you

WHAT A FUCKING LOOK THAT'S AMAZING

i am sad she is probably just the first arc villain because WOW i am DIGGING this. god that FLAMINGO HEAD STAFF this is such High Kitsch, it's giving me everything.

asklfjds;af /laughing hysterically to self

okay persona 5 strikers we are starting on some high notes huh

reverie are you sure you aren't dreaming, man, this feels like a dream you might've had except the person stepping on you in stilettos would be a mean boy.

maybe that's Reverie's type. bisexual but mean-attracted.

aaaaaargh my Odin is outta battery, i gotta recharge it.

BUT SO FAR besides me fucking sucking at the gameplay THIS IS A GOOD START.

[tonydaddingham]

okay, so… i know neil has replied to this question already, and he said that the costume changes for crowley are motivated by the simple idea that “he just wanted a change that day”… but like… did he, really?

i truly welcome the costume change, i honestly think it was needed, taking into consideration that there already have been 4 years between the two seasons, crowley is the man with the trends and things have changed so much in such little time. also, i'd love to see crowley with that turtleneck from now on, i like the new glasses as well, but… the turtleneck only appeared for one episode, while still using his 2019-glasses. and then, the next episode, it was the usual combo with new glasses and that's what we got for the rest of the season… something simply does not sit right with me, taking into consideration that the costume department on gomens does a phenomenal job (see: 1941 and recreating the looks perfectly).

that made me think about that mega-theory that has been circulating about the writing of this season and how it might reflect metatron's meddling and i am really questioning now, because this is one aspect that i did find particularly odd, are we sure that those costume changes aren't important like neil has said?

after all, neil does need to lie or hide details that might be revealed later, just like he hid so much about how season 2 will go, and another thing is that he also did say that he didn't include certain lines about hastur in this new season because he didn't want for people to take them as relevant or important… so, just like that meta underlines, there is intentionality in their choices. what was the intention behind these two costume changes, then?

hey boo, funnily enough @theeminentlyimpractical and i were laughing about the Sideburn Theory™ and how we got it sooooo wrong, "turns out lmao it's just shoddy continuity and crowley went shopping/got a haircut"-

-and maybe that's true but... no, i don't think it is. i agree with you, and think there must be something a bit screwy going on. ive got the huge theory that you mentioned bookmarked, and have skimmed through it, but need to really sit down and read it properly. in any case, i do think metatron had a bigger hand in this season that we're giving him credit for in the last half hour of ep6.

now idk if its anything or just something of nothing, but whilst i love the idea that it's aziraphale and crowley together that is the cause of the 25-Lazarii scale miracle that got heaven going into reactor meltdown (and maybe it is - id love it if that were the case), but idk how far i believe it.

and so - time to whip out the tinfoil hat.

for whatever reason, there seemed to be a lot of emphasis this season on that section of the bookshop (and again might be just because, or down to filming logistics etc and tbh now i think about it probably definitely, but i cannot for the life of me shake this from my noggin):

like, that one shot is so pretty but also feels so purposeful? and was then bookended by aziraphale in ep6 calling 101-metatron through the portal...

i just can't shake the feeling that metatron (especially given that he was very pro-armageddon in s1 and lmao aziraphale and crowley went and fucked it up anyway) might have had a closer eye on them than anticipated...

...like, he knew to approach aziraphale with 'gross matter' and encourage him to partake. knew that the archangels had gone down there to the bookshop in the first place. knew how to push aziraphale's buttons as concerns crowley. knew the true nature of their relationship (or at least suspected it), even though it was put like only hell really had any clue.

knew that aziraphale wouldn't in good conscience turn down the opportunity to change heaven if it meant he, crowley, and everyone could actually experience a heaven that befits the name. knew that he ought to dress in darker clothes to lend himself more to being 'in the grey', rather than the exclusively light clothes the archangels favour.

knew to adopt mannerisms and speech patterns that were eerily like aziraphale himself, who has spent thousands of years living amongst humans. knew to directly address crowley as the only clued-in figure in the room, "what about you demon, do you know me?".

knew to take aziraphale across the road to the restaurant where aziraphale and crowley had previous sat, aziraphale adopted the softest expressions we've ever seen. knew to say "take all the time you need" to encourage aziraphale to speak to crowley, but then hurried him out the door as soon as the argument was over and aziraphale's resolve was wavering.

now idk if any of this actually means anything. im sure it probably doesn't. but it is odd. i don't necessarily think (so far - may well change!) that metatron's been directly influencing anything from the very beginning, because i think that cheapens the season's kinda message about having agency and conviction in self... but it does bely a certain amount of peril that in many key moments, aziraphale and crowley were not alone.

now in terms of the costume? that i have no idea on. but iirc in the book, crowley was described as having bought loads of the same sunglasses - he even keeps spares in the bentley glovebox! so why would this, and his hairstyle, change so drastically? idk. i don't even have a musing on it, let alone a theory. i don't think it's a case of "that's not crowley!", i don't think someone is impersonating him or mind controlling him... but something does stink to high heaven✨

[imabillyami]

Thoughts on Summerslam?

Hey lovely anon! Thanks for asking and being interested as always 💜 I appreciate you! 

A little warning: this contains a lot more complaining and bitching than my opinion pieces usually do, but I honestly expected more from this PLE and I’m feeling a little meh about it, cause a lot of it didn’t live up to the hype for me personally (if you wanna read mostly positive things start reading from the Gunther vs Drew portion onwards). 

As always, these are my personal views, other's might differ from that and that’s completely fine and valid. We all enjoy different things and it’s good that we do. (Disclaimer, cause I don't want any drama in my inbox from anyone reading this.)

I thought the first half of the show pretty much sucked. I wasn’t invested in it at all and had a tough time sitting through all of it. 

Match by match under the cut:

Logan vs Ricochet: Anyone who knows me or has been following me for a while knows that I fucking hate LP’s guts. I wish he’d walk out and never come back, cause yes, he’s a fucking terrible human being and a quick google search will tell you all the reasons why. He doesn’t deserve the spotlight he gets, he deserves jail time. I’m glad Ricochet got an opening match at a big PLE though. He’s one of the best in-ring guys of this generation and seeing him perform is always a blessing. I fucking hate that he lost, but we all knew he would, didn’t we? And Samantha having to announce LP as the winner had me 🤢🤢🤢 As for the match: It was okay. Too much posing and showing off for my taste. Classic LP. And don’t get me started on that screwy finish or the commentary about Samantha. (+ As much as I’m happy Ricochet got to be on the card in that manner, I’d rather have seen Becky vs. Trish or a Rhea title defense in that spot.)

Brock vs Cody: Y’all know my stance on Cody. I don’t like him. I don’t care about him. I fucking hate the “finish the story” narrative and how he forcefully inserts himself into shit all the time. He’s not as great or talented or charismatic as he thinks he is and I cringe so hard every time he opens his mouth. I don’t know what other people see in him, but I guess to each their own. I for one wish he’d leave and never come back. But that’s just me. He called himself “the best wrestler in the world” in an interview recently and I’m sorry, you’re not the best wrestler in this company and there’s many more wrestlers from other promotions who are way above you on that list, sir. Plus your acting and selling sucks. Sorry, sorry, this wasn’t supposed to be an anti Cody rant. If you like him, go ahead, but I’m not gonna hide my dislike for the man. Brock is awesome, I’ve always respected him immensely as an athlete. He’s always been very legitimate and very protected and rightfully so. I don’t know when opponents (other than Roman) started getting up and walking off an F5 through the table, but apparently that’s a thing now… The highlight of that match for me was seeing all of Daddy Brock’s good parts lmao 😂 

(I’m still bitter about Becky vs Trish not being on the card. They had time for 10 minute video packages between all the matches, but they didn’t have time for this highly anticipated match? If I speak 😶 That feud could have been one for the ages if it had gotten the proper booking it deserved)

Battle Royal: I know they had to do this one for sponsorship reasons (and probably to give LA Knight a win and appease the audience, which don’t get me wrong, I LOVE LA Knight, but what good does that win do him?), but I could’ve done without it. Again on my women’s matches agenda here. With how over he is, the crowd wouldn’t have accepted another winner, so it was predictable. It gave the audience a feel-good moment though, so I’ll take it. 

Shayna vs Ronda: I love Shayna ❤️ 100%, no questions asked. As for Ronda… I’m not gonna say much, other than I hope this really was her last match in WWE. I still don’t get why we got an MMA rules fight instead of a proper wrestling match, but then I haven’t been following the build to this very closely. I’m glad Shayna won and I hope she gets to move on to bigger and better things in WWE now that she’s out of Ronda’s shadow. But that’s probably wishful thinking. 

Drew vs Gunther: Was exactly what I wanted it to be. Just two big meaty men hitting and chopping away at each other, manhandling and throwing each other around. Beautiful. I knew I was gonna like this and I did. I love seeing both of these men in the ring. Gunther winning was no surprise, but this time I didn’t mind. He deserves breaking that record. He’s been doing incredible incredible work for a long time and he deserves all the good things he gets.

Seth vs Finn: You have no idea how much I love Seth and Finn, no idea 😭 These two (+Sami +Bryan Danielson) to me are the best technical wrestlers of this generation. No matter what, they will always be able to put on a banger wrestling match, so I’m always always always loving it when they get into the ring together. It’s just beautiful to watch them move. Art art art. I love Seth’s mind games, I love the whole arena singing Seth’s song, I love the history between them. I love everything about it. Either of them deserved that win and that title, I’m glad Seth retained though, he deserves a good long title run. (Also can’t wait to see what TJD getting involved in the match will stir up. That ever growing tension between Damien and Finn is delicious to watch 👀)

Asuka vs Bianca vs Charlotte: The build to this match was terrible, not gonna lie. The match delivered though! The crowd didn’t appreciate it enough, which is a big L on their part. These three did amazing! Sure it wasn’t all smooth sailing and some of it was visible (also thanks to some not so great camera angles), but the quality of the match was still awesome! 

Cash-In: I’m so so fucking happy for Iyo!!! She deserved this for such a long time and I’m so glad they made the decision to put that title on her (I was fully expecting Bayley to cost her that title, so it was a nice surprise that she didn’t and that she was actually the one taking everyone out, so that the path was clear for Iyo. A beautiful showing of friendship 😭 And I loved seeing Dakota and the sweetness that was these three friends celebrating together ❤️ For me this was the highlight of the night!)

I’m also hoping this will be the final straw in turning Bianca heel. She looked like she reached her breaking point during all this, so I’m carefully optimistic. I’ve been wanting it for a long time and with the Profits now having turned heel the dream of heel!Bianca feels closer than ever 👀 WWE I’m begging you! 

Jey vs Roman (aka Jey vs everyone in Tribal Combat): Moment of deep deep appreciation for Jey’s beautiful beautiful back ink and the man who put it on him. Incredible 😍 As for the match: I’m not gonna lie, I had my difficulties with this match. The buildup was so epic, the match itself felt a little disappointing to me in comparison to their earlier bouts. I adored Jey vs Roman at Clash of Champions and HIAC and I loved the tag match at MITB, so I had very high expectations for this match and maybe they were too high. Idk to me it felt a little off and very much not like Jey’s usual pace and what these two are usually capable of.

Don’t get me wrong, it had some very good spots and some very emotional moments (and some highly comedic ones too, Jey telling Paul to grab the other side of that table? I was cackling! Solo screaming at Roman and looking seconds away from murder after that spear? I was pretty much on the floor, cause it was too damn hilarious!), but overall it felt to me like something was missing. Plus most of us saw that Jimmy return and him turning on Jey and costing him the match, the championship and the tribal chief position weeks ago and from a million miles away. I still think it’s too soon for this and I would’ve loved to actually see this for WM40 next year, just the way Josh and Jon have been dreaming about, but we’ll see.

Seeing it coming doesn’t mean I’m not devastated about it. That ending with Jey crying and screaming all alone in the ring? OH MY GOD. I’ve been watching them as a tag team from the day they arrived in WWE with Tamina and I never thought we’d see the day they break up, but I guess I’m comforted by the knowledge that Josh and Jon are going to have the time of their lives with this feud. For us though? Emotional pain awaits, but what else is new

I’m very curious to hear Jimmy’s reasoning (I'm guessing jealousy or Jey leaving his side when he got hurt to challnge Roman) and to see where Solo fits into all of this if Roman is really taking a break for longer. I can’t see Jimmy realigning himself with Roman or Solo tbh, cause that would make everything that happened since NOC pretty much useless. I’m pretty happy if he goes down the lone wolf route for a while. As for Jey? We know that man had deep trust issues before, but now that his entire family has turned on him, imagine how bad it’s gonna get. Sami come help your man! He needs you and you’ve got nothing going on anyway. WWE please make it happen! We need this! Give Jey back the only person who never turned on him! It could be epic! (doesn't convince you? it could make you loads of money!!) Don’t fumble this, idiots!

All in all: Hated the first half, loved most of the second half. And the parts I didn’t love… well, it is what it is and we’ll deal with the aftermath of it as we always do - by being delulu while writing copious amounts of fix-it fic and crying about it 🤷

Hugs to you anon 💜

[solarcitymelodies]

so I wrote all of this in class while procrastinating and. here's my hot take. Karr is either mentally ill or neurodivergent or both like hear me out

I think that Karr is just a relatable character for mentally ill/neurodivergent people generally because it literally feels like his whole story and character is a metaphor for the stigma around that and also the way people just lack understanding so severely

Like how a lot of the time people will do something they expect to be helpful when really it makes everything Worse, and then proceed to get frustrated or outright angry that it didn't work? Even if you TOLD them it wouldn't? Yeah. That's basically what FLAG did with him lmao

See that he did something Wrong, didn't bother to teach him or help him understand, and just... Locked him up? Nice going, now he's got trauma tho

And of course him not understanding the “rules” of society and making people upset on accident because of it… very much has Neurodivergent Vibes ™

What gets me about Karr is that he lacks emotional regulation severely, partially because that’s just how he is, but also because he was raised in an unstable and hostile environment, you know? And the fact that he doesn’t attempt to mask that dysregulation for any reason and is basically called a monster because of it… uhhh that hits a Little Too Close To Home for Reasons lmao :D

Like. Anyone whose brain is fucky tends to feel really really big emotions, and letting yourself feel them in front of people is scary!! There's a lot of judgement to be had with emotions that are hard to control and regulate because people just.. don't understand. and just from Personal Experience, my fear is that it can also become dangerous because I was never taught how to keep it under control, since people always brushed me off as dramatic. And I know I ain't the only one who was never taught how to properly cope with that. There's a whole lot of us.

Karr clearly doesn't give a shit about who judges him much BUT what he can do is stay angry at people for five million years because there was no closure, and he feels like there's no way to get that other than literally physically attacking people to like... Avenge himself? But yeah, pretty common experience among us to need closure like that and be willing to go to extreme measures for it if we feel like what happened was particularly fucked up?? Usually doesn't involve attempted murder but like. You know what I meant hopefully

But like ,,, that's what happened with Karr, basically. He never learned how to cope with having big emotions. He never had the support or the resources he needed, and he hurts people because of it. Granted, he doesn’t quite understand why it’s wrong, but I'm willing to bet he knows it is. The issue is that he literally can’t control himself.

FLAG recognized that he experienced the world and processed his emotions differently and literally kicked him out of society and abused him for it 😃✌️and holy shit if that's not THE MOST obvious metaphor for neurodivergent people being ostracized from society

Am I projecting? Yeah obviously but to be fair that's how I get all of my best ideas

Also sorry if the wording here is all screwy I literally copied and pasted this from a much larger rant so. Some of this might not make sense lmao and if it doesn't feel free to ask me wtf im talking about

[kcabyap]

I haven't played Mystic Messenger in a few years, but yes, it's really good!! You might lose sleep over it though, the game's events play out in real time and some chatrooms open at like 3am and you have until the next one opens to participate in it, trust me I've lost plenty of sleep over Mystic Messenger lol

Also there's one girl who has a route too!! It's just a platonic route unfortunately, but I choose to ignore that fact lmao -🌼

Ah, that's honestly okay, my sleep pattern is screwy right now anyways so if some are open really late then I'll probably be in a pretty good place to catch 'em! 😂

Oooooh, a girl? My bi/pan self is curious! Even if she's just a platonic route, but we can look over that little detail~ 🤭

[i-love-him-on-purpose]

the half of it liveblog

LET’S GO I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS SINCE MARCH hi. my name is abby, and this is me watching the half of it

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

i have big gay expectations for this movie

as an asian wlw, i do NOT want to be disappointed

starting NOW

fuck YES this animation is beautiful

plato. this movie is already calling out my dumb gay ass

they did really good casting with ellie! imagine having a movie with high schoolers that LOOK LIKE HIGH SCHOOLERS

chugga chugga chu chu? SQUARE UP BITCH

OMG paul and ellie’s first meeting is iconic

“i’m not looking to cheat” “no one is”

“gET a thESaURus uSE a speLLcHecKer gOOd luCk rOMeo”

this is an accurate representation of hold times istg

IS THIS A MEET CUTE?!

aster looks so tired but wowowowowow she is hecking beautiful

ellie is a disaster gay

exhibit 1: staring at aster in band

exhibit 2: “i’m ellie chu?!?!?!”

exhibit 3: more staring in the hallway

staring/longing is the peak gay experience

she is FINALLY charging acceptable prices for writing

i’d ask $15 for two page

maybe she just loves writing

can’t relate

“SHE’S LIKE ALL THREE” paul you eloquent mf

he’s a ROMANTIC... but so bad with words omg

“yah my grandma’s dead wanna go out with me”

“love makes you screwy. don’t you get screwy?”

istg you dumb jock ily

in love, one always starts by deceiving oneself... and ends by deceiving others

PAUL OMG

i LOokED uP PLaiGiAriZed

...

wow i had to stop for like 8 minutes there to properly watch their letters play out

the way alice wu spins this story is absolutely gorgeous

aster and ellie are so in sync and understanding of each other

the art, the words, the letters

everything just meshes together perfectly and i’m already in love with their story, whether or not there’s a happy ending

oh ho ho... paul....

no but he’s totally right

dating is burgers and fries and ice cream and whatnot

love is what ellie and aster have been doing– the talking and the listening and the understanding

smithcorona ahaha

“i love... nazis” paul you good there

oh honey you understand nothing

LMAO i love how ellie’s riding away on her bike and paul’s just bent over in the background PERFECTLY poised to pick up a rock

YES! jock + lesbian friendship

“hi ellie chu’s dad” has the same energy as “mr. jack’s dad” and “mr. sir” if u know what i’m talking about (check, please! mutuals hi)

yeSSIR yeSSIR

i love how paul just treats this like drills he has to run

jocks, man

PFPDFSLDKJF HE GOT FASTER AHAHAHA

why do neither of them know how to play ping pong istg

i love one (1) girl that laughs at horror movies

omg my anxious ass would be terrified if i thought someone was watching me

oh, i thought that line was about aster

but it still makes sense in a friendship way

and this IS a friendship movie so it does make sense

my coward ass would’ve never brought a boy home in high school

especially not to my enthusiastic italian father

besides i only ever dated one person and she was a girl and i hadn’t come out to my parents yet

kudos to ellie

oh i just realized that aster’s christian

does that influence her views on lgbtq?

probably

oh, ellie

watching that made me tear up

god, falling for someone who doesn’t know that you’re you

this english teacher is fckin hilarious

and also totally not a romantic lmao

OMG FATHER SHANLEY

AHAHAHAHA

“world’s asleep. more room for secrets”

now THAT’S what love feels like

falling in love with the little things

wait he doesn’t say “you like aster?”

THEY SCAMMED US

...does he support her or not

paul munsky say something

oh he realizes that he doesn’t know what love is not that ellie likes aster

“if love isn’t the effort you put in”

i love this friendship and paul’s quiet wisdom

oh boy there are weird chewing noises

TACO SAUSAGE!

aww paul’s a romantic and ellie’s hilarious

seeing “guy” makes my heart hurt

aw ellie have a little faith in our dumb jock <3

this is so cute and super awkward

i feel like i did this at some point in high school

OMG PAUL WHAT ARE YOU DOING

what just happened

awww he’s so enthusiastic

bitch what the fuck is “a look”

CONSENT

wtf is this a fucking rave

WTF ARE YOU BITCHES DOING

are high schools like this now??? is everyone fucking horrid?

yes girl play your song

wait a sec can they all hear her without a mic

she wrote that? that’s so sweet <3

awwwwwwww

but that’s so cliché

it’s literally high school musical

oh boy now she’s POPULAR?

i love their friendship so much

OOP

awwww I LOVE THEIR FRIENDSHIP

omg what? shoes in the house? shoes ON THE BED? DISGRACE PAUL MUNSKY

jk him caring for her is literally so cute

i’m glad we can have that platonically

she did that for him? aww

the way she spits out the advil is hilarious

OMG ASTER?!?

i bet she thinks ellie and paul are dating

oof

“it’s paul’s chinese friend” who the FUCK do you think you are? STEP THE FUCK UP KAREN

oh it’s the daisy!

it’s gorgeous

i feel like aster definitely suspects something

OH THEY’RE SPENDING THE DAY TOGETHER

i have no idea what she does at the station?!?

“SECRET PLACE” oh lawd

aster definitely knows it’s ellie

i wish i had a secret pond

but alas

i am just a poor city girl

ellie is a disaster gay and i am living for it

LONG UNDERWEAR ellie is prepared for all situations

paul is so sweet that’s adorable

“i don’t think i’ve ever hung out with a girl and not talked about boys before” the GAY is showing and i love it

but love isn’t about feeling safe

it’s about feeling adventurous but being safe

you’re in HIGH SCHOOL why tf r u thinking about marriage?

oml don’t get married to trig he’s a fucking idiot

i lowkey thought they were going to kiss

and then ellie “i am a RUSSIAN DOLL of clothing!!1!1!”

sdlkfjsdlkf

AHADHSFDSJFLDSKFJLESKF PAUL LOOKS SO NERVOUS

when my asian mom did this, my white dad would look just like him, even after literally decades of marriage

WOAH the visuals

just... two people looking at the same sky

so intimate

“gravity is matter’s response to loneliness”

that’s so deep but all i can think of is r/showerthoughts

just two girls discussing their deepest beliefs and secrets in a spring

i would like to do that pls

lmao ellie’s dad and paul are besties now

oh

oh ellie

COLLEGE you deserve to go to college!

omg aster and paul’s height difference

paul’s siblings are hilarious lmao

SLDKFJSDL “A BUNCH OF GUYS SNIFFING EACH OTHERS’ BUTTS” is maybe the most accurate description of high school sports

guess all that running really paid off paul

“squahamish scores for the first time in 50 yrs” i-

ellie trying to finesse the yakult is the funniest thing

what the FUCK just happened

what

what

what

that was like watching a train wreck in slo-mo

paul WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?

WHAT THE FUCK

dkjlsfdksjlfkldsjf

i have zero words.

...trig

is he ok

who sprayed him? was it paul or ellie’s dad??

oh god literally all three of them are ruined

paul! he’s trying! and that matters!

he’s been taught to condemn it

but he supports his friend first and foremost

so he tries to understand and accept it

...oh no paul’s mother

ellie looks so sad :(

ugh i’m crying

she had to grow up too quickly because of her mother’s death

“have you ever loved someone so much you don’t want anything about them to change?”

i’m so emotional

SKSKSK “i had to grind something” homophobic mother looks up

the fuck is “little lady”

oh i get it he’s proposing

trig is literally the human manifestation of microaggression

ASTER DON’T DO IT

ELLIE?!

the painting metaphor is back and i am not ok

AND I OOP- she slapped him ok ok ok

“mommy wants you to know that in case you are gay, mommy still loves you” “no mom i’m not gay” “thank god” “i might want to change your sausage recipe though” “are you INSANE?” THIS IS AN EXACT PARALLEL to when bitty came out and mama bittle still loved him but then the JAM (hello again check please mutuals if ur still here ily)

lmao the english teacher “now that is some divine intervention” she is neutral evil and i am LIVING for it (bet she’s wlw too)

“you don’t mean dead, right” SLDFKJSDL

“love is messy and horrible and selfish... and bold.” -ellie chu

that’s fucking beautiful

aster looks... so tired

COLLEGE YES SHE’S GOING TO COLLEGE

i have no words i just want to watch this and cry

they kissed.

they KISSED.

“i’ll see you in a couple of years”

i love that they don’t end up together

that they know that they should wait, that it’s not their time yet

because love is “the trying, and the reaching, and the failing”

ellie looks so happy

she’s comfortable in her own skin

FINALLY

she deserves everything

omg the emojis slap

her dad’s conductor? station master? idk but he’s working again and i’m so proud of him

is paul seriously giving her sausage

lmao

“too smart to be crying on the platform like a wussy” “i’m not crying” “wussy” underrated exchange of the year

paul chasing after ellie on the train is so sweet

i’m sobbing

“moron”

ugh

she looks so content and i love that for her

that’s the end

if you made it this far, congrats! 

overall 10/10

it’s such a sweet movie it’s well paced, well written, and well shot

time to go see if there’s any fic

bye!

[flameintheblacknight]

Since someone out there may be curious:

Anya binges Red Vs Blue: A record

(with appearances from the Discord Crew)

1/23/18:

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:35 PM

so like

i have a bad idea

imma binge watch red vs blue

why?

iunno

someone stop me

Boi-Last Tuesday at 1:36 PM

Uh...

Best of luck?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:36 PM

...that's not stopping me.

PheNoamenon-Last Tuesday at 1:36 PM

The one season of rvb I saw wasn't that good

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:37 PM

i mean, there has to be a reason people like it, right? Might as well watch it and find out.

 And two episodes later…

 I think I'm in love

this seems like something good

PheNoamenon-Last Tuesday at 1:42 PM

#random-tv-shows

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:42 PM

aye aye

 ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 1:45 PM

Have fun with RVB @Amazeanya the loved~

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:45 PM

I will!

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:50 PM

I actually cried during one of the seasons. So have fun.

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:50 PM

well, that bodes well

joy

But really though, I think I've laughed more watching the first two episodes of this than I have in a while, so that bodes well!

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:52 PM

There are mood swings. Also, I need to rewatch it too

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 1:52 PM

Upupupupu~

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:53 PM

I wonder if it’s still on netflix

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 1:53 PM

13 seasons of it

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:53 PM

...holy fuck

Why am I watching it on youtube when I could be on Netfli--oh, wait, that's right, because I love my laptop

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 1:53 PM

14 and 15 you'll have to do via RT or YT

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:54 PM

I would recommend doing them through YouTube. Playlists are nice

PheNoamenon-Last Tuesday at 1:54 PM

One playlist I found had s1 mwsswd up, I think it was RT's, so make sure

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:55 PM

Hmm, yeah, it does seem like the playlist is a bit screwy, so I'll just use the standard video-jumping feature.

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:56 PM

Or use Netflix

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:56 PM

I'll use Netflix later!

When I'm at like, my grandparents or something.

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:56 PM

...? Why not now?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:57 PM

Because I am lazy and I don't want to drag out my iPad or ask my mom what the netflix account password is... actually, you know, might as well just pull out the ipad

holy shit

I think someone in my family's watched it

It has nearly full watch-bars for seasons 1-4

Magical Girl Zunko-Last Tuesday at 1:58 PM

I mean

It’s a popular show

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 1:59 PM

true

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 2:05 PM

screw it, back to youtube, that's easier to handle, and they at least tell me who's speaking

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 2:07 PM

Captions tho

But understandable

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 2:07 PM

My captions don't say who's speaking, for unknowable reason

so... back to the one with good subtitles!

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 2:08 PM

Enjoy-

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 2:09 PM

I will!

dammit, Donut, that's

that's not remotely anything like a fucking store

omg

it's like

i'm seeing all the pieces to disaster line up in front of my eyes and

i am loving every second of it?

and thus a capture the flag war is won.

how the hell do they manage to create a coherent storyline with callbacks and brick jokes in the form of like, a few episodes that don't go longer than 5 minutes?

Episode 8 and I'm worried for some reason

oh shit

oh shit

oh no oh shit

fucking tanks

this is going to end... badly

oh fuck

what the fuck?

You do not do this to me this fucking early in the show, dammit

Why

what the

fuck

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I

um

is he dead?!

holy fucking

holy fuCKING(edited)

I

WOW

somehow I have more reactions to this than I did to RWBY

I have no idea why, I just do

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:04 PM

omg

I just

is he dead, tho?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:04 PM

Keep watching

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:04 PM

I am

Oh, hey, Sarge. Been wondering where the fuck you were.

omfg

Goodbye, stupid-ass tank that killed Church. No-one will mourn you.

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:06 PM

Poor Sheila

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:07 PM

Sheila's a tank tho? One that fucking... killed Church? I mean. Why mourn the tank?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:08 PM

Also, they don’t show up in the playlist, but you should watch the miniseries. I think that the first one takes place concurrently with season 4, but I could be wrong

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:09 PM

Hmmm, so, when I reach season 4, hunt down the miniseries, got it.(edited)

...okay what the fuck

okay, what the FUCK

okay, I'll... accept this as a thing that I am seeing and hearing.

So... okay then.

Trying to rationalize this will just lead me down the path of madness so...

okay then

who the fuck is this "Tex"? And why is a warning needed?

Church, get to the point plz

okay then, that was mildly horrifying and completely impossible.

A PERSON WOULD BE DEAD THE SECOND THEIR SKULL WAS RIPPED OUT

THA-IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!

tucker, no

tucker, you could've, iunno, listened to your dead friend?

wait what

no

don't

TEX, THE FUCK?!

I GET YOU'RE A MERCENARY AND ALL BUT

DAMMIT

DON'T

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:26 PM

Miniseries guide: Out of Mind and Recovery One should be watched after Season 4 but before Reconstruction (Season 6) Relocated should be watched after Reconstruction MIA and Where There's A Will, There's A Wall I would recommend watching some point after Season 9

and I don't think any of the others are canon, so they're more 'watch for fun' along with the PSAs

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:26 PM

gotcha

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:27 PM

Anya, you watching Red Vs Blue?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:27 PM

yes

Currently on Season 1, episode 11

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:27 PM

ooooooh boi

You're in for a ride : P

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:28 PM

Season 10 is probably my favourite

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:28 PM

i've been told it's a ride. and i can see why.

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:28 PM

but I haven't seen a season that I've disliked in any way, shape, or form

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:29 PM

becauSE HOLY FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WAS THOSE PAST FEW EPISODES

AAAAAA

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:29 PM

You haven't even scratched the surface yet

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:29 PM

oh boy

oh shit

oh shit shit shit

what is that on Donut's head?!

GAH

THE FUCK JUST

WHAT HAPPENED?!

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:34 PM

me in every episode of this fucking show

Boi-Last Tuesday at 3:34 PM

Well...

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:34 PM

Oh that bodes fucking well

Boi-Last Tuesday at 3:35 PM

I think I'll pass on ever watching RvB if this is the reaction to the first season.

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:35 PM

lol

you probably should pass

Boi-Last Tuesday at 3:35 PM

Yep, I think so.

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:37 PM

Oh, hey ghost-Church. I've heard this was all filmed on like. some Halo thing for the first season, right?

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:38 PM

Yep

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:38 PM

So, they'd have to come up with logical... ish reasons for in-game things like the flags being returned.

which they did

Tucker, you're a bad liar.

omfg

the store and elbow grease thing

fucking brick jokes

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:40 PM

Gotta get that headlight fluid : P

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:40 PM

lol

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 3:40 PM

Uh oh, the lights are dim! Better put some more fluid in there!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:42 PM

what

wait what

UM WHAT

CHURCH, IMMA NEED YOU TO EXPLAIN SOME MORE

I what

UM

FUCKING WHT

SURE?!

OKY

WHAT WAIT

TEX IS CHURCH'S EX-GIRLFRIEND?!

okay, sure

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Last Tuesday at 3:49 PM

xD

I love reading Anya's reactions to Red vs Blue

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 3:50 PM

So like

wait a fucking minute

infused her armor with an AI?

I, um, how(edited)

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffft

ahahahaha

who the fuck pronounces both like "bolth"?

it makes no goddamn sense

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:57 PM

that's RVB for you

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:04 PM

wait

"Sidew-"

As in, like, the planet Church was on before Blood Gulch??

???????????????????????????????????????????????????

confusion

aaah... dammit Church, your Sarge impression... it's shit

church. you're making me hurt inside. please stop

Church... you could've explained that... when Sarge and Simmons weren't there

omfg

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:09 PM

Puhuhuhu~

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:10 PM

omfg

ed, could you not

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:10 PM

;P

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:11 PM

caboose, no

don't

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:11 PM

There's a saying one of my friends say all the time to sum up this show. Would you like to hear?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:11 PM

yes

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:11 PM

"Things got better, but things got worse."

;P

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:11 PM

That... that seems accurate

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:12 PM

You haven't seen anything yet

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:14 PM

OH FUCKING

FUCKITY

is it weird at all that i screamed a little when I heard that fucking tank in the spirit world?

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:21 PM

Pfft-

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:21 PM

dammit, rvb, you do not

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

Wait wha

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

I was all fucking shook

then

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

OH!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

DAMMIT

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

OML

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:22 PM

lmao

How does that work, tho?

How does CPR save you.... when you've been shot

in the head

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:23 PM

Science

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:24 PM

@best bubbles can CPR save a dying person who's been shot in the head?

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:25 PM

SCIENCE!

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 4:25 PM

No

No it cannot

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:25 PM

knew it

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Last Tuesday at 4:25 PM

Why was that even a question

PheNoamenon-Last Tuesday at 4:25 PM

because someone did it in rvb

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Last Tuesday at 4:26 PM

I'm aware of that

But like

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:26 PM

SCIENCE!

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Last Tuesday at 4:26 PM

It didn't need confirmation

Doc even says in the show that it shouldn't be possible, I think

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:27 PM

who's Doc?

friendly reminder I'm not even out of Season 1

ArcherM-Last Tuesday at 4:28 PM

CHANDY NO- tackles SPOILERS MATE

Shh(edited)

Don't worry about it

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:29 PM

...okay

sure

sooo, now that I know the name of the place... I'm like 99.5% sure Sarge was, at some point, stationed at Sidewinder. This may be canon, and I'm just too dumb to pick up on it right now, but. Eh.

wow

the things one does for love, it seems

I mean, I'm all for the Red Team not dying.

you know. Donut could've been given any other type of armor, but noooo

the guys at red command just had to go with pink

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:52 PM

It's lightish red Anya

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:53 PM

it's goddamn pink

CABOOSE, NO

I STG

sigh

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:57 PM

How to sum up Red VS Blue in two words

"CABOOSE NO"

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 4:58 PM

no kidding

pffffffffffffft

rip Church, stopped by Sarge fucking up the whole getting Lopez a communication feature, and making it so Lopez could only speak in spanish

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 5:04 PM

oh shit

Sheila's back online

oh shit

TEX

....what the shit?

WHAT THE SHIT

WHY DO I HAVE A HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE FEELING NOW?!

OH, WAIT, I KNOW WHY, IT'S BECAUSE OF THE FUCKING DEEP VOICE AND MY SUSPICION THE VOICE IS RELATED TO THE FUCKING

AI

who the fuck is this purple guy

"whatever you do, don't" WHAT?

what the fuck isn't purple guy supposed to do?!

wait wait wait

wait wait wait

hold the fuck up

Did they just get a different thing to film these with in between seasons

or does Church look less ghosty now

ooooooh

that makes sense

woah, Reds coming in with a sneak attack!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 6:00 PM

omg, even the subtitles changed from DuFresne to Doc whenever he speaks

lmao

omfg, even the show itself is in on it

...surrender? Hmmmm.

...uh oh

omg

Caboose is down a toe

huh

they've all been drinking fucking

condiments

everything makes sense now

except how they're still alive

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 6:16 PM

Except Church

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 6:16 PM

yeah

but then again, by this point

he's a ghost

in a robot

so I'm not sure he counts

please, please don't flip the fucking switch

it can't end well

Boi-Last Tuesday at 6:26 PM

*insert Nintendo Switch ad sound effect*

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 6:26 PM

dammit

lol

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 6:28 PM

where are you at, Anya?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Tuesday at 6:29 PM

Season 2, Episode 23

halfway or so through the episode

Actually, I should just say Episode 23, shouldn't I?

what the hell is that beeping?!

WHAT THE HELL

oh no

OH BOY

 1/24/18

you know, reading these, it makes me sound like I was going insane.

...

back to going insane!

everyone in this goddamn canyon is weird, tho

omfg

omfg

the fucking elbow grease joke

I really don't think this is a good idea, guys. Sure it makes logical sense but... are we sure you guys can't just find a robot engineering for dummies book somewhere?

sigh

don't

please don-- dammit(edited)

DAMMIT

god fucking dammit

lmao

wait... so, if the reds actually think to look, they can see ghost-Church too?

maybe

iunno

only Simmons seems to have kinda noticed him so far

eh

those primary objectives tho

god

fucking

dammit

omg

Oh, look, an April Fools' day episode!

you can tell by the fact that this episode isn't remastered

what the fuck

i

is this

lmfao

This is fucking wonderful

oky, back to the actual show

at this point, I'm starting to doubt that.

WHY THE FUCK IS DONUT RIGHT ABOUT ALL OF THIS?

I MEAN

ALL OF HIS THEORY WAS

ENTIRELY FUCKING TRUE

OMG

hw

um

I shouldn't be confused by this, I think I've passed the point where I can actually call myself confused but...

nope, I'm just

speechless

what

what

TEX?!

I mean. You should probably just roll with it, Sheila. It's not going to get saner.

good. DESTROY THAT FUCKING AI

Or you could get an "Engineering and Mechanics for Dummies"

Just saying that

guidebooks could help

Well, at least Donut's accepted the truth of his armor's color by now. That's something?

Hey, Tucker... you mind letting whatever the goddamn hell is happening in there... happen. You go make sure that the Reds shut down their AI Helmet things

...you've gotta be freaking kidding me.

what

hwat

wait

GRIF

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 1:02 PM

Wait. Where's Tex?

okayyy, so O'Malley transferred to Doc. That makes sense.

Thank god it was---oh shit.

OH SHIT, GRIF

oh thank god, he's alive

can Lopez and Sheila just

elope?

and get the fuck outta the canyon, to live a happy life together?

plz?

donut

run

please

just

go away from the cave

please

pfffffffffffffffffffft

it's like i got an intense feeling of deja vu

and it paid off

church... you somehow have the worst timing... yet also the best

I mean, what I just said makes sense, right?

Eh

nothing makes sense when you think about it

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 2:06 PM

Holy fuck, the last episode of Season 2 is 16 minutes

that's long for this show so far.

that was

really fucking sweet, Donut

wow

oh

boY

this is going to be ...a thing.

wait wait

the only none-helmet guy is... talking with both sides.

something's off here, I can feel it

but what is?

vic

how dare you withhold information from us, the audience

HOW DARE

What... the... hell is happening?!

oh god

Tucker

oh god

also, hi, internet dad

did you see the 360 videos yet? They're really funny

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 2:27 PM

I’ve seen a few of them, dunno if I’ve seen them all yet though

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 2:27 PM

ahhh

And Tex re-arrives... at the tail end of the season

woop-de-doo

WHAT

WHAT WAS THAT ENDING?!

WHAT THE FUCK

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 2:33 PM

Oh boy, Season 3 approaches

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 2:33 PM

No, really though: HWAT THE FUCK

Something tells me things are about to get a lot more trippy... very fast

OH THANK GOD, TUCKER'S ALIVE

A-am I seeing what a typical Halo PvP round looks like here or something?????????????

mood: confusION

camping is indeed a strategy tho

an annoying and kinda cheaty one

but a strategy

...who the fuck is this Wyoming person?

and why does he have an australian accent?!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 3:06 PM

oh, thank god, we never have to go back to the Halo Multiplayer realm ever again

yesss

oh, great, we're back to fuckface o'malley

...and Lopez

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 3:11 PM

The zealots crack me

And you will worship me as though I were a god!

whack

I regret nothing! I lived as few men dared to dream!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 3:13 PM

pffffffffffffffffffffffftlmao

um

wtf happened to Florida, the state?

What happened to it?

oh god

oh god this is going

to be a

blast

...

i'm so fucking sorry about that

...sidewinder? Again?

What is up with people and Sidewinder?

Why Sidewinder?

What significance does Sidewinder have?!

wht th fuq

the fuck is even happening

omfg

Now, who will win? A bunch of idiots playing Halo PvP, or an AI who wants to murder everything?

...I'm p sure you could make a meme version of this

huh

HUH

WHAT THE FUCK

IS EVERYONE DEAD

THE EXPLOSION WENT OFF

THEY ALL HAVE TO BE DEAD

BUT THERE'S 6 FUCKING MINUTES LEFT IN THE EPISODE... AND 12 MORE SEASONS

WHAT THE FUCK?!

no, really... the fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

what the FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

the... the future?!

WHAT????????????????????//

I mean, it's true. We are always in the present, and everything we do will, in less than a second, turn into the past, like, the minute i stop typing this and press enter

like I just did

That message is now something I typed. Not in present tense, but in past tense

you see where I'm going with this>

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Last Wednesday at 3:56 PM

Yeah

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 3:58 PM

but like

it's weird to think about because

the present will only ever exist for a second

and it's always becoming the past

and the future will become the present, which will turn into the past, and the past will just

stay past

wow

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 4:01 PM

what the HELL

WHAT THE FUCK?

IS THIS A REFERENCE TO A DIFFERENT HALO GAME OR SOME SHIT

WHERE THE HELL IN THE PAST IS CHURCH?!

hey, wait. There was a logical answer to their problem: Just... Church would get out of the body, because, y'know, he's a ghost... and they'd all get the fuck away from the robot.

Oh MY GOD

WICKED BURNS ON THE MATRIX TRILOGY

WOOOOO

oh, great, it's one of the freaking PvP idiots.

guys

guys lemme hear what the fuck Tex is saying

guys

...what?

oh no

oh boy

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 5:19 PM

OH MY GOD, TUCKER, WHERE DID YOU FIND THAT?!

IT'S AWESOME

CHURCH?!

OH THANK FUCK, I'VE BEEN MISSING HIM!

OH NO

OH BOY

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 5:28 PM

WELP, THEY'RE TRAPPED

this. this is why we should never trust this group with anything ever.

oh god no

oh no

timeline bullshit is about to happen

yay

or not

maybe

iunno

episode 50 time'

here goes

what the hell

oh, this is going to be confusing

omg

omggggg

oh my god. Tucker looks so weird without aqua armor holy fuckkkk

wait, who's the guy who just walked out of the Blue Base? And why do I have the feeling he's gonna die?

ohhh

nooo

i already feel sad

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 5:47 PM

where are you at?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 5:48 PM

halfway through episode 50 and oh

ohhh no

Flowers is allergic to aspirin and... lemme see

oh no

yep, it had aspirin

no

he's dead

and... oh god, it is a stable time loop, I knew it

pffft, and let's see how many more events Church will accidentally set into motion

what?! Hi... Donut, or past-Donut or whatever the fuck's happening right now

omg

elbow grease

it's fucking episode 3 on the timeline right now

yep, definitely episode 3.

omg, and now I'm having flashbacks to when I watched these episodes... yesterday

and... Church just kinda sorta caused his own death

oops

wha....

omg

omGOD

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 6:02 PM

pffffffffffffft

omg

And.. that's Episode 50 down. Onto Episode 50, part 2

GOD DAMMIT, CHURCH.

mood: confused but loving it

what

What

ANOTHER FUTURE-CHURCH

WHAT

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 6:22 PM

Ah yes

You're on that one : P

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 6:23 PM

what the

qhat the

mood: no longer loving the confusion

this is

this is reminding me of that one manga where all the Homura Akemis meet up on a bar to discuss their various time loops

okay so. This just got another layer of confusing,

eh

and we're back with the crew at the fortress, about to die

woo?

Well, that was resolved easily

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 7:23 PM

okay, I think I know who's sending out the signal

i

okay then?

I mean, I've seen weirder, if the bomb's sentient, that's not going to surprise me

And I'm not surprised by this.

Merely amused at the punchline.

Totally not wondering where the hell this series' lost its sanity

whwhwhat the fuck?!

omg

pfffffffffffft

oh goddamn it, O'Malley's alive too

here we go, almost at the end of Season 3. Just two more episodes to go

okay, it is going to be embarrassing if these slow-ass robots fucking

win

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 7:49 PM

you think the reds and blues can still be embarrased?

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 7:49 PM

...

lmfao

not really, at this point

we've kinda gone through insanity and back to the point where I'm just...

conditioned to accept crazy

things that annoy me: the varying subtitle quality

on to the last episode of the season

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 8:07 PM

Donut speaks spanish, wonder why I didn't know or at least realize that earlier

they

they just ended up at the Gulch again

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooo

fuck

I liked not being there!

what

oh fuck

WHO THE FUCK

OH GOD, CHURCH

EVERYONE ELSE ON TEAM BLUE

OH GODDDDDDDDDDDDD

That

WOW

On to Season 4

*insert link to the rules of Grifball here*

I should be focusing on the episode right now

eh

well, Donut, you guys are probably still in the "future", if such a state of time even exists, but there is the possibility that coming back to Blood Gulch somehow brought you guys into the past and

I shouldn't even be treating this as a rational possibility, this way madness lies

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 8:38 PM

Red VS Blue is madness incarnate

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 8:38 PM

I've noticed, thank you very much

i regret my life choices today

rereading the stuff I've posted in here the last few days almost reads like an apocalyptic log

...huh? Sheila?

Hmmm

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 8:51 PM

Just wait until you get to Reconstruction and beyond

That's when it gets really good

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 8:51 PM

oh

oh great

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 8:51 PM

Yep

Reconstruction is one of my favorites

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 8:52 PM

i'm already going insane, dammit, I don't need to speed it up!

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:09 PM

CABOOSE, RUN

RUN

...is there a fucking

dimensional rift on that rock, or is that the teleporter on top of Red Base?

no, no. There's definitely something glowy in a rock in the background.

is it at all weird I want to hug Simmons?

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:14 PM

no

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:17 PM

i... i mean, you know something's insane about a show that has one plot where a group's trying to translate what an alien's saying, and another where a contest between a wrench, a skull, and a rookie is being held for the title of second in command.

no, wait, it's not a wrench, it's a vehicle

okay sure

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 9:18 PM

Welcome to Red Vs Blue

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:18 PM

no, wait, it is a wrench

the vehicle just had spray paint on it

am i

am I even watching this?

Or is this some fever dream I concocted because the actual show is boring???

someone, please tell me a description of what happens in Episode 62, so that I can line it up with my current experience

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 9:25 PM

Church is tryign to get Gary to translate the alien language

Shield has amnesia

Simmon goes bonkers

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:26 PM

i mean. yeah, that's... that's about right.

oh god

it's not just a fever dream

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:26 PM

RvB is insanity incarnate

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:26 PM

i've noticed.

I don't think there's a way to get my lost sanity back

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:27 PM

Nope.

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:27 PM

mournful crying off in the background

I regret my choices

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:27 PM

By the way, have you watched Camp Camp yet? If not, I recommend it for after you finish RvB

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:28 PM

Okay, that's another for the binging list

best bubbles-Last Wednesday at 9:28 PM

The story becomes a lot more coherent in later seasons

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:28 PM

Should be significantly easier to binge, it’s only two seasons

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:28 PM

oh thank fuck

for both of those things

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:29 PM

Though it hopefully won’t be long before we get new seasons of RvB and CC

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:29 PM

...

time to go back to binging

I'm going to want to be caught up, won't I?

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:30 PM

Yeah.

I think once the new seasons/shows start airing, I’ll make a Rooster Teeth Show chat

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:32 PM

you should do that, yes

Damntastic Despair-Last Wednesday at 9:33 PM

Though RWBY will stay separate, considering it’s the big RT show

Amazeanya the loved-Last Wednesday at 9:33 PM

yeah

1/25/18

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 11:18 AM

you know.

I should try and value my sanity.

...nah

oh great

well... great

so... bye Tucker, have fun on your quest with the alien!

omg

who the hell is this guy who claims to be from the past and why does he look, sound, and seem like I fucking KNOW HIM?!

I stg if the monster attracted to the Sword is Tex...

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Yesterday at 11:54 AM

I mean. She IS attracted to the sword. Kinda. Not the way you're implying.

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 11:54 AM

i mean

she fucking wants to use that sword tho?

and yep

seems I was right

Hi Tex

um... should I be surprised that Church wound back up at Blood Gulch too?

Probably not

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 12:00 PM

the guards...they're all people wearing red or blue armor. it really depends on which guard...

this is suspicious.

ah, dammit, it's the pvp people guarding the temple/base/fuck it

Gooo Tex!

You got this!

who

who let Tucker have the fanciest, brightest keyblade ever?!

WHY

i just i

angery noises

what?

what

I'll just keep watching

what

hehh?

the fuCK?

Wyoming?

He's still fucking around?!

GREAT

Not really

how the fuck

Um. I'm starting to doubt anything time-related happened.

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 12:28 PM

Maybe I'm wrong.

Also, hi Tatsu

ohhhhh

I guess that makes sense?

...wait, what?

What happened in those 800 years, anyways?

literally everyone knows except Donut.

Simmons is not a good actor, is what I'm saying

please, oh please, I don't care if no-one else hears this info about the war, just please

i want to know

I can't believe everyone just. Finds Blood Gulch so easily

Like. Wow

How small is this planet?

Also, why hasn't more changed in Blood Gulch, anyways?

now, when I hear these guys talk about the sword thing, I just mentally see a fucking keyblade

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 1:03 PM

nooooooooooooooooo(edited)

whyyyyyyyyyyyyy

there are

there are so many better plans than this one

Almost at the end of Season 4, just two more episodes to go.

lmao

I am

so sorry, Lopez

I just

I'm sorry

um,,,

whath

I

yeah, i have nothing to say

nothing I can say

All the words I could've used to react to this just

not there

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 2:03 PM

ahahahahahaahahhahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah

it's official

this show's pushed me over the edge

I'm never getting that sanity back(edited)

Sooooooo all that happened.

Looks like we

are getting some new cast members?

okay, cool

so, question: @Damntastic Despair do I start Season 5 next, or the two miniseries next?(edited)

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 2:20 PM

Either or, but I recommend watching them before reconstruction

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 2:21 PM

gotcha, I'm just going to do Season 5, then the two miniseries.

WHAT

DAMMIT

oh god, is Donut going to be alright?

I

I really don't think you can call dibs on a spaceship

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwhat

GRIF HAS A SISTER

A sister who... beat time itself.

oh

my

fucking

godddddddddddddddddddddd

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 2:54 PM

SISTER

Sister is amazing

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 2:54 PM

I have noticed

Well, wherever Donut's fallen into, I'm sure it's just made things a little more interesting

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 3:14 PM

oh my god...

They didn't mean for Sister to be on Blue Team, right?

I mean, technically, they're missing a commander, after all

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 4:10 PM

Well, I mean, they are awesome, but...

both teams are equally crazy, I'll leave it at that

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

lmfao

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:20 PM

I wish I was able to say I can't believe this

But, sadly, I don't think I have the ability to any more

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:22 PM

Where you at?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:22 PM

Episode 83

I know, I know, it

it's probably rather early for me to have thrown in the towel on logic

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:26 PM

Oh boy

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:26 PM

I will take that as a yes

insane from boredom or insane from what's done to keep boredom at bay... this is a tough choice

my suspicions were confirmed.

Oh, she's colorblind. Well, that makes sense, I think...

oh, great, we may finally figure out where Donut is!

Simmons... I would like to redirect you to a certain... incident in season one.

You cannot trust Team Blue to not kill each other

really

well, I mean, technically, it was a self-caused murder because of stable time loop bullshit but

still can't

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 6:00 PM

oh, no... oh no no no.

I know those signs, and we haven't seen O'Malley pop up in a while...

oh this... this is going to be an awkward conversation

wait, what?

Where's Sarge?!

WAIT, WHAT

TEX, IS THAT YOU?!

The episode summary for the next one: Everybody’s under attack and it’s all incredibly stressful.

that bodes well

...it's probably not Tex. Or something is seriously wrong.

well, shit

O'Malley's jumped

And I think I know who's the victim.

god damn it

Blue Team, ya better start running!

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUU

TRANQUILIZER DARTS

oh no

where's Grif?!

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:09 PM

internal mood: please, I'm begging you, get on with the plot!

please, I want to finish Season 5 by the time I have to log off!

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 7:11 PM

Where are you at?

Because Season 5 goes up to episode 100

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:12 PM

Just started 92

8 more episodes!

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 7:12 PM

You got this!

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:12 PM

one of which is 20 minutes long

I GOT THIS

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 7:12 PM

You still got this!

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:16 PM

oh god

the blues are about to be attacked, I just know it

OH GOD

RED TEAM, GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE AND TELL BLUE TEAM WHAT THE FUCK GRIF HEARD

PLEASE

oh

it's Andy, and Lopez, probably... and someone else

but... who's the someone else?

So, not Lopez, an alien... who looks to be the same species as Crunchbite was...

oh shittttttttt

I'm starting to get an idea.

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 7:28 PM

you know, I'm surprised you didn't comment on Tucker's pregnancy at all

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:33 PM

I did

somewhere up there in the confusion

yep, it's about when I start laughing mad

onto 93!

York? Who's that?

So... 

Who the fuck is Carolina and why is she already dead. 

how the fuck it's been 900 years?! 

There should be like more signs of things having changed

What?

Why the phone call?

wait... I have a weird idea that's probably wrong but

let's see

shitttttttttt

also, yep

idea was right

what

Wyoming's alive, that's fucking greattttt

But he and Gary--er, Gamma are working together. I fucking liked Gar--Gamma

Something's off

Something bad's gonna happen

Because there's no real reason for a guy that's clearly playing both sides to tell one side to straoght up murder the other, unless something's up

At least said other side is currently underground

Aw shit

...what the shit

Where has Red Team found themselves?

Why does it seem like a security room for a mall or something?!

Why is someone spying on both teams...

Something's definitely wrong about all of this

The lack of distance between wherever the fuck they were for the climax of Season 3 and Blood Gulch... the fact that people seem to be still alive, 8 to 900 years in the future...

THE FACT THAT NOTHING OF GODAMN INTEREST BESIDES THESE IDIOTS FUCKING AROUND HAS HAPPENED FOR 5 SEASONS

well, i mean

that's exxagerating

I was feeling sad, now I'm laughing a little bit

The world ends (again). For real this time. All episodes after this one are prequels.

that's what it says

what the fuck

I...

I'm worried now

omg

“This video is no longer available due to”

PFT

“copyright infringement”(edited)

AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHA

“claim by”

OH MY FUCKING GOBWAHAHAHAHA

“Viacom, Inc.”

AHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

lmfaoooo

And they also just managed to burn their own show

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:00 PM

oh my god.

Of all the things that Junior could learn

Well, like father like son, I guess

there's something wrong with Red Base. It's more purple

dammit, Tucker

pffffffffffffffffffffffft

5 more episodes.

just 5 left now

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:05 PM

Bow chicka honk honk

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:05 PM

you're just gonna chime in with random quotes while I'm doing this, aren't you, Jake?

can't say I don't appreciate it

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:06 PM

One of my favorites

Your toast has been burned. And no amount of scraping shall remove the black part(edited)

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:06 PM

pffffffffft

So, Sheila's like. A spaceship now!

That's cool!

Also: " This summary is currently loading. Perhaps you would like a cup of coffee while you wait? "

Something's wrong

what the hell is that behind Sarge...?

and who's singing?

wait... oh my god. Those bodies are just the old ones of Church and Tex!

pfffffffft

now, anyways, back to wondering wtf is going on

Oh, hi, Lopez

what

the

fucck

no

No

fucking hell

no

No

FUCK YOU, OMALLEY

THAT'S RIGHT, I FUCKING SAID IT

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU TO HELL AND GODDAMN BACK

YOU DO NOT

THERE IS A POINT WHERE I DRAW A LINE

THIS IS THAT POINT

also, nice callback there right before I started freaking the fuck out

really, Tucker?

ugh

I'm not even surprised

shut up, Vic.

something is fucking

up

...oh my god.

holy fuck

no. oh god. Blue leader... that would be Sister.

Oh my god, oh god/

And she's been sent down into the caves.

oh god

wait

wait wait waitttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

no

NO

this

I

how

s h i t

shitshitshit

shit

Wyoming

Thank you, Sheila

Hey, Red Team! You wanna... shoot Wyoming? Maybe?

ahh, dammit

NO

NO NO NO

OH GOD NO

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 8:40 PM

Having fun?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:40 PM

IUNNO

I'M ON EPISODE 98

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 8:40 PM

what happens in that one again?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:41 PM

shrugs I think something's wrong, but

IUNNO

LIKE, UM, GAMMA'S THERE

POSSESSING A TANK

AND TEX HAS BEEN KNOCKED OUT BY WYOMING

AND SOMETHING'S OFF WITH TUCKER

KNOWS WHAT

NO

NOOOOOOOOOOO

CABOOSE

SIMMONS, NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE REFERENCING FUCKING SEASON ONE WITH YOUR DEJA VU AND ALL THAT FUCKERY

oh no

Tucker's started going through a time loop

oh no

nO

don't panic, Anya, it'll be fixed, it's a time loop

it's

a

time

loop

again with the deja vu, Simmons?!

oh dammit

OH DAMMIT

oh

my

god

WHAT THE

THAT WAS FUCKING

AWESOME

WOOHOO TUCKER

Okay, I'm pretty sure Grif and Simmons have the ability to be somewhat time-loop aware

like, it's not even effected by anything

they just(edited)

do

no

OH NO

THAT'S A HORDE OF WYOMINGS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:50 PM

Time travel trouble

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 8:50 PM

I think Anya's broken

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:51 PM

you THINK

on the second to last episode now

OMG, SO O'MALLEY AND VIC ARE DEFINITELY WORKING TOGETHER, THAT'S FOR SURE

WAAAAHOOOOO

THAT WAS AWESOME, TEAM RED!

eh.

those idiots will be fine

what the shit

what the shit

the last one, now

Episode 100

"Why Were We Here?"

I'm not ready

Episode description: It’s the end of many things, but it ain’t over ‘till it’s over.

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:00 PM

OH FUCK

OH FUCKITY FUCK FUCK

FUCK YOU, O'MALLEY

GET THE FUCK OUT OF HIM

RIGHT

NOW(edited)

why do all the plans begin with Grif abuse?

dammit

Again?

ughhhhhhh

sigh

Why

Why do we have to go back to Caboose's mental landscape again?

wait... what?

dammit, O'Malley

OH MY GOD

YELLOW CHURCH

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTHAHAHAAHAHAHA

what the HELL IS HAPPENING

ALSO, WHY DIDN'T CHURCH HAVE MORE OF A REACTION TO BEING POSSESSED?!

EVERYONE ELSE DID

THEIR VOICES CHANGED AND EVERYTHING

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

best bubbles-Yesterday at 9:16 PM

O'malley is an asshole, Church is an asshole : P

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:16 PM

it's going to blow up

Andy's going to blow up the ship(edited)

best bubbles-Yesterday at 9:17 PM

That's what he does

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:17 PM

Tex

Oh god

everyone's dead

everyone on that ship

gone

oh my god

it's like nothing's changed yet somehow

everything has

it's like the first episode

but not

It's over

Season 5

is over

wow

I finished the Blood Gulch chronicles...

holy fuck

I did it!

best bubbles-Yesterday at 9:23 PM

And now

Onto Recovery One and then reconstruction

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:23 PM

Hey, I'll do the miniseries stuff tomorrow

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 9:25 PM

Out of Mind THEN Recovery One

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:25 PM

Mmhmm! Gotcha!

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 9:25 PM

also

#rooster_teeth_chat is now open

1/26/18

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 11:22 AM

Okay then, I have enough time to watch Out of Mind before I must leave!

...At least, I'm assuming this is where I go to react to the RvB stuff while I binge.

Eh, I'll just start and react anyways

So then, from what's... blatantly obvious, this takes place probably directly in between Season 4 and Season 5 and follows Tex as she tracks Wyoming.

This'll be fun!

hmmm

first off: fuck you, O'Malley.

There, I am now content with the world again

Holy shit, a flashback!

Holy shit, Church!

Well, Church but in the past

Still Church!

Dammit Wyoming, you fuck

Just

let them talk, at least

angery sigh

pffffffft. I like York.

I am feeling sad for characters that I knew for 5 minutes, at most. And their deaths were fucking... foretold. But eh. Still feel sad.

And that is the end of Out of Mind!

I was expecting it to be longer, but eh.

It was still awesome!

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 3:38 PM

Yeah, the miniseries are short

And York was cool

*insert posting Episode 100 alternate ends here*

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 4:30 PM

Basically: all the alternate endings are their own flavor of good

Now, on to Recovery One!

...wha?

We're back at... back at here again.

Good thing I watched Out of Mind beforehand, so I know where here is

I have no idea who this person is, but I love them.

Agent... Washington, then. Is he... part of the Freelancer project, too?

Hmmm

best bubbles-Yesterday at 4:41 PM

They do love their state codenames

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 4:41 PM

they really do

But, if that's so, I really doubt that any time bullshit was involved.

At least, they can't have been sent into the future

Something's off about this whole thing.

Somehow, I know we're gonna find out what

oh

oh wow.

oh shit

Something's stealing the Freelancer AIs and enhancements.

Well, someone, more likely.

But who?

woah my god

This is going to be wild

CAN WE STOP WITH THE TUTORIAL PROGRAMS?!

best bubbles-Yesterday at 4:58 PM

Tutorial Programs Kill(edited)

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 4:58 PM

It's true

...what

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:00 PM

Oh

My

GOD

WHAT THE FUCK?!

HOLY SHIT

I COULDN'T HAVE SEEN THAT ONE COMING

That was

AMAZING

Now... it's on to Season 6

It begins with a quote that's supposed to sound important, but now all I can think of is the Sharkboy and Lavagirl review that NC did

dammit

Focus, me, FOCUS

I am already confused

Back to normal for me, I guess best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:07 PM

Reconstruction

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:08 PM

yeah, I know, it's still confusing tho

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:08 PM

No I mean

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:08 PM

At least we have confirmation that Outpost Alpha isn't the only outpost, though.

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:08 PM

This is a great season

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 5:09 PM

This season is where RvB makes the jump from good to great

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:09 PM

Really?

Well, that's awesome

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:10 PM

Yep

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:12 PM

WAIT

WASH IS ALIVE

HOLY FUCK

I hate this "Councilor" person already.

...META ...?

Hmmm

great

a new villain of the arc

and it sounds like it's gotten O'Mall---sorry, Omega, on its side.

Experts? No, no, they're not experts. Trust me.

ohhh

here we fucking go

And we're back to an all too familiar location

Woooo?

what

WHAT

TRANSFERRED?!

OH SHIT

Please, oh, please, if the same thing's happened to the Reds... but it will have, won't it?!

UGH

AAAAAAAA

WTF

oh god

they're all transferred, too

Or not

Hi Sarge!

And hi Lopez!

Oh thank fuck! We have a lead on where the rest of Blue Team may be... and probably where the rest of Red is too

...

also, Sister was hilarious in this episode, just thought I'd say that

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 5:30 PM

Sister is hilarious in every episode

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:30 PM

true

dammit, Caboose

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:34 PM

The funiest part is that they wrote in a ton of obscene lines for her voice actress as a joke

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:34 PM

Sorry, Wash, you had no idea what you were getting yourself into.

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:34 PM

And she read them all

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:34 PM

omg

Only person?

Nah

If you want the knowledge and the experience needed, just

just go get the rest of the Blood Gulch crew.

...please?

I love them and I don't want to lose them

OMG THEY HAVE ACTUAL STINGERS NO--oh no

oh no

WHO WAS THAT?!

Oh thank fuck.

Hi Church!

It's been... over a year?!

holy fuck

what the fuck

Oh, gee, Wash, you haven't even met most of them.

It just gets weirder from here.

oh

no(edited)

NOPE

I know that effect

lol

there's where the TVTropes quote at the top of the page comes from!

...

wait

back up, Washington

Simulation?

Fake?

back the fuck up and explain

fucking hell.

best bubbles-Yesterday at 5:49 PM

Yep

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 5:50 PM

I mean

All the signs were starting to point towards it, but

NO REAL EXPLANATION?!

SO WE'RE PROBABLY GOING TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL EVERYONE'S AT BLOOD GULCH AGAIN FOR ANY ANSWERS

JOY

huh? South? Delta?

What are you two doing here?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 6:03 PM

Dammit, South, what bullshit did you get yourself into?

Okay, so, she got her enhancement back, or, more likely, she never lost it.

shit, if META has the whole time-loop-causing thing...

We're gonna need Tucker. ASAP

...what?

That... that was weird best bubbles-Yesterday at 6:07 PM

It was the worst throw ever

Of all time

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 6:08 PM

no, I mean the time slowing down thing!

best bubbles-Yesterday at 6:08 PM

I know : P

And yeah, it was

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 6:09 PM

Please, oh please someone, anyone explain the simulation thing to me?

South... the fuck?!

North... NORTH WAS YOUR FUCKING BROTHER

YOUR FLESH AND BLOOD

HOW

HOW COULD YOU

Chapter 7 summary: The one where everybody enjoys the exposition.

THANK YOU

PFFFFFFFFFFFFF

THEY HAVE A SHORTCUT FOR CABOOSE'S TEAM KILLS

AND IT'S CRTL + F + U

LMFAO

Alpha AI? Can you go on about it?

Please?

WHAT

OH GODAMMIT

THE META IS A FREELANCER

WELL, THIS JUST MAKES EVERYTHING GREAT, NOW DOESN'T IT

best bubbles-Yesterday at 6:20 PM

I love how you and Church had basically the same response : P

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 6:20 PM

heh

I suppose we did

Damn... 3 minds in one body? God, that would be so... so shitty

IT'S THEM

IT'S THE REDS!

YES

oh shit

Welp, we've lost Delta

Now then: Flashback tiiiiiime

oml

Lopez is fucking wonderful

guys... what the hell did you two do?!

no

lmfao

Who

Who thought it was a good idea to put Grif in charge?!

that was fucking insane and I expected no less.

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 7:15 PM

Okay then, we're back/

Church. Church, just. Stop, please. For as long as it takes for everyone to get on the same page.

Then you can fuck around with the voice amplifier.

WHY

THAT IS A HORRIBLE CODE WORD

oh shit, there's Meta

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:06 PM

mix of crying and laughing

why

why are we here again

pfffffft

Now we get exposition time... but this time it's explaining shit we were there for!

...I don't know how I'd explain it, tbh

Wait, what? No other place would get the robot kit... something's off

I want explanations.

Now.

I feel

so bad for Wash right now.

I would be fed up too/

But sadly, I've spent too much time around these nutjobs. I know this is how they work.

...Testing grounds?

holy... holy fuck.

that makes... I think that makes some form of sense.

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:18 PM

Now you know why they were there

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:18 PM

...glares

But... why, though?

Sure, it makes sense, because nothing ever happened there, but

Why?

And... I really don't get what the fuck was up with the so-called "time-travel"

Because there is no

fucking

way that can be any form of truth

What... what's the significance of "Memory is the key"?

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:20 PM

Well, who do we know who had a time-manipulation abilities?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:20 PM

Wyo---oh.

Oh, yeah...

But, on another note, we're still missing two people. Tucker and Donut. Neither of them have shown up for... 12 episodes now, and I'm getting worried about them.

So... we'll need the Alpha AI. And that will bring us to Command. ...okay, sure.

But we're still missing two people, and I'm really worried about them.

Church... I can understand why but

can you please not

pffffffffffffffffffffffft

The old possession trick makes its return!

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffthahahahaha

of course

pffffffffffffffft

I mean. That plan makes sense.

Somehow

Oh NO

DAMMIT META

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:41 PM

Wait, which episode are you on?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:41 PM

6, 15 now

Just started

best bubbles-Yesterday at 8:42 PM

Alrighty

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 8:45 PM

wait... freelancer command is responsible for at least a good chunk of the crazy shit that was gone through at the gulch?

jesus fucking christ how bored are those people?!

...what

WASH, WHY ARE WE BRINGING OUT EPSILON?!

WHY?

Also, we're still fucking missing two people

oh my god

they... they tortured the Alpha AI?! That...

That's horrible.

I don't know why, but something about that... it's making me angry?

Yeah, very angry

And what's up with the memories that Church's getting?!

oh no. Meta's here.

I can tell

oh.

oh wow.

the foreshadowing was there.

ha ha ha

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 9:00 PM

you got to the big reveal?

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:00 PM

The one that Alpha AI was tortured to create all the others? Yes.

And apparently it's been moved, too, which is... wonderful

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 9:01 PM

yeah, Project Freelancer was messed up

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:02 PM

OH

MY

FUCKING GOD

CHURCH ISN'T JUST AN AI

HE'S THE ALPHA AI WE'VE BEEN FUCKING LOOKING FOR

THAT EXPLAINS WHY OMEGA DIDN'T AFFECT HIM AT ALL--BECAUSE THEY'RE THE SAME PERSON

OH MY FUCKING GOD

HOLY FUCKKK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HOLY FUCK

...that was the big reveal, wasn't it?

holy fuck

I think I kinda spoiled myself on it but

still fucking shook

best bubbles-Yesterday at 9:06 PM

He is the droid we're looking for

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:06 PM

...

...

.........

I'm not sure

how to respond to that, Jake

best bubbles-Yesterday at 9:07 PM

Good

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:10 PM

mood: freaking out but silently

honestly, if I were told I'm an AI, I'd react close to how Church is right now.

Because... there's no way I'd believe it!

TUCKER

OH MY GOD

WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?

WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!

NOOOOOOO

COME BACK

PLEASEEEEEEE

I MISS YOU SO MUCH

On to Episode 18

dammit, a cliffhanger

and I'm going to have to go offline soon

I'll do the finale of Season 6 tomorrow

Damntastic Despair-Yesterday at 9:27 PM

prepare yourself

Amazeanya the loved-Yesterday at 9:27 PM

Okay

I've got a good couple of hours to prepare

 1/27/18

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:27 AM

i have a feeling nothing I do will make me ready for this.

ArcherM-Today at 9:27 AM

Oooh boi-

What happened, what have you seen? OuO

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:28 AM

Read up, I've seen up to just before the finale of Season 6

There's also like. A record of me going insane in #random-tv-shows

ArcherM-Today at 9:35 AM

Ommai

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:36 AM

This show is probably a detriment to my mental health.

ArcherM-Today at 9:37 AM

Shh, you'll be okay-

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:38 AM

Time for the finale.

guys, for the last time, it is pronounced E-M-P.

Not emp

ArcherM-Today at 9:41 AM

Ehehe-

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:44 AM

oh my god

That was one thing I was not expecting!

really?

Even the goddamn computer system calls it an "emp"

oh no

oh no

OH SHIT

ArcherM-Today at 9:49 AM

OH YEAH- oh wait

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:49 AM

...UNSC? What the hell is that?

ArcherM-Today at 9:50 AM

United Nations Space Command. Just the Halo thing

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:50 AM

ohhhhhh

oky

HWAT

WHAT THE

FUCK

ArcherM-Today at 9:51 AM

OuO

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:51 AM

THE DIRECTOR OF PROJECT FREELANCER... HE'S THE BASIS FOR ALL THE AI?!

HE'S WHO CHURCH IS BASED OFF OF?!

WHAT

THE FUCK

ArcherM-Today at 9:52 AM

upupu~

Upupupupu~

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:52 AM

ED STOP!

YOU'RE NOT HELPING

ArcherM-Today at 9:52 AM

UPUPUPUPUPU~

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:52 AM

UGH

ArcherM-Today at 9:53 AM

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:53 AM

STOPPPPPPP

MY MIND'S BEEN BLOWN TO BITS, OKAY?!

DOES THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY?!

ArcherM-Today at 9:53 AM

Yes, you're mind is blown like mine was~

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:54 AM

I already knew the AI thing from clicking on one hidden spoiler on the TVTropes page for Blood Gulch chronicles but

wow

I'm still shooketh

ArcherM-Today at 9:55 AM

;)

Things get better, but things get worse~

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 9:56 AM

wait... no

no

He... is he dead?!

NONONONO

FUCK

CHURCH

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

so... now I'm off to watch Relocated. V said that I should watch that Miniseries after this season, soooo

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 10:04 AM

Here we go

ArcherM-Today at 10:05 AM

Have fun! ;P

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 10:08 AM

Well, if you could try and make the car EMP-proof... but that's impossible. I think.

pfffffffffft

I love this miniseries

you're fucking pfffffffffffffft

there is an 800 foot ladder

lmao

I really doubt Sister's dead

eh

Does she ever show up again, though? Or should I just... forget she existed?

eh

oh

my

god

A holographic training room?!

That's FUCKING AMAZING

DONUT?!

Find what under sand?!

Well, at least we have Donut back

Now, onwards, to Season 7!

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 11:02 AM

...okay, so maybe I lost myself watching side videos that are completely non-canon

Okay, it's now 11:30 AM... I am going to start watching Season 7.

I mean it this time!

pfffffffffffffffffffft

lmao

Now it's time to play: "How to explain Season 6 to someone who wasn't there for it"!

HWAT

OH FUCK

TUCKER, WHAT HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOURSELF INTO?!

OH FUCK

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 12:00 PM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

no real reason I screamed

just felt it appropriate

ughh

fucking

councilor who I still don't trust or like or just

fuck him

Is there a fourth option to describe Blood Gulch? Because... none of those describe my experience there.

The only word that does is... insane

in the best way possible, but still insane

WHAT

WHAT

OH SHIT

OH SHIT OH SHIT NO

OH MY GOD

WASH!

YOU'RE ALIVE!

pffffffft.

...huh?

hmmmmmmmmmm

...wait, what? Who? Why did the episode stop here?!

GAH

oh my god, wow.

Epsilon, mate... you're amazing, you're doing great.

I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH THAT PART TOO

UGHHHH

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 1:00 PM

WHAT?!

Well, I mean, this will be pretty damn fun, but

What?

Okay, sure!

lmao

guys, just. Bring some water. You three will be going into a desert

bring the fucking water

i can't(edited)

what

they just... drove into the water

OMFG

OH GOD

SHIT

...I know that voice. I think.

... C.T, according to the subtitles... I feel like I know who this is.

...we all know Caboose isn't dead. This is just fucking... setting up a punchline. And usually, killing off main characters is reserved fro the last episode of a season. And there's still 10 more episodes to go.

yep, he's fine

hmmm, maybe not, then. In person, the voice is definitely... different.

...kinda

Maybe

not really

I don't think you want to know, person who probably isn't Tucker.

heh?

HEH?!

WTF

um, I don't think Epsilon really counts as equipment.

Okay, now the subtitles for when probably not Tucker is speaking have changed to ???

I...

Hmmmmmmmm

well. This just makes everything more... life-threatening

It's the latter. They're all fucking idiots.

oh

fucking

no

DONUT, RUN

NOW

WHAT?!

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?!

ArcherM-Today at 1:56 PM

O.O

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 1:56 PM

pffffffft, brick joke

BUT ANYWAYS

WHAT'S HAPPENING?!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

TUCKER!

WOOOOOOOOO

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 2:02 PM

Welll.... two are at the new bases... and one's dead.

Yeah.

WHAT

YOU KNEW?!

HOW?!

HOW THE FUCK CAN META STILL BE HERE, ANYWAYS?!

I THOUGHT HE DIED

what

the

fuck

ArcherM-Today at 2:23 PM

These miniseries is making me sad. ;;

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 2:23 PM

Oh? Whatcha watching?

ArcherM-Today at 2:54 PM

Out of Mind and Recovery One

Amazeanya the loved-Today at 2:54 PM

Oooooh.

Yeah, Out of Mind's sad.

eh on Recovery One.

ArcherM-Today at 3:03 PM

York... ;;

1/30/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 11:38 AM

okay, so after putting this off for a while, it's finally time to finish Season 7!

Onwards, to Chapter 17!

oh shit.

Seems the door's been busted.

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

i mean, I'm not exactly surprised by this anymore

so

the meta could have cloaked any sort of vehicle

It went for a warthog.

Why?

LMFAO

DAMMIT, TUCKER!

THAT SEEMED LIKE IT WAS GONNA BE COOL

BUT NOPE

On to the last episode of the season!

pffffffffffft

maybe you should've taken the driving lessons

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 12:00 PM

HOLY FUCK!

THAT WAS AWESOME!

oh fuck

no

NO

WASHINGTON, WHAT

THE

FUCK

HOW

DARE

YOU

YOU MAY HAVE KILLED THEM BOTH

THAT

I

WHAT THE EVERLASTING FUCK

what

the fuck

and that

THAT'S HOW IT ENDS?!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

FUCKING HELL, NOW I HAVE TO START SEASON 8

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

okay then, I am calmed down, so... here we go, Season 8 time.

Holy shit, Doc!

I haven't seen you in forever!

holy fuck

holy fuck

ohhhhhhhhhhhh

fuck

We got an unidentified... person, over here!

Blackish or gray armor... might be a freelancer.

wha

what

WHAT?!(edited)

so... the plot thickens

yay

wait... the armor... was kinda familiar, I think?

Lemme rewatch

holy shit, paused to get a freeze-frame and... I think I know whose armor that is

on to episode 2!

hmmm, now I'm curious.

hmmm, now I'm curious.

Oh my god, Sarge could tell everything that's gone wrong?! In a few seconds?! HOLY FUCK, THAT'S AWESOME

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 1:00 PM

WAHAHAHA

THAT WAS AWESOME!

or what?

Oh, look, it seems Red's gotten here! Nice but also o fuck.

how the fuck did they get there so fast, anyways?

um, Chandy...

I think you posted in the wrong area

This is...

this is the Rooster Teeth Chat

Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Today at 1:21 PM

.....

SHI-

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 1:21 PM

lol Xtremely cool Chandishishi~-Today at 1:21 PM

Whatever are you talking about

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 1:21 PM

dammit, I didn't get to preserve it for posterity's sake!

you know, if this is played right... we could be able to sic the aliens on the Meta and Washington. We just need to make sure no-one fucks up immensel--why am I even telling myself this?

Shit's gonna get fucked up anyways.

best I don't hope.

hey, Epsilon-Church? Did you have to follow the Reds? You could've... told the others what you heard, then followed them!

DAMMIT, GRIF!

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, YOU DON'T THINK YOU COULDA REMEMBERED THAT A FEW SECONDS EARLIER?!

And holy fuck, this fight scene looks awesome

best bubbles-Today at 1:29 PM

Gotta love that mocap

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 1:29 PM

THAT WAS FUCKING AMAZING

IT ONLY LASTED A FEW SECONDS BUT

THAT WAS ONE OF THE BEST ACTION SCENES SO FAR!

okay, I'm not sure how I feel about this episode title

"Recovering One"

really?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 2:20 PM

okay then, time to start watching again.

oh, dammit. I forgot Epsilon-Church was following.

You can clearly tell the exact moment the animation changes from Halo graphics to

WOAH, WHY DOES THIS LOOK GOOD?!(edited)

aka computer-animated

Dammit, Epsilon-Church...

but seriously though, the computer-animated sequence was fucking amazing

no, don't

please, don't

HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK, WOW

meanwhile, the name of the next episode makes me want to make a 4/20 joke

omg

oh no

of course he landed in between a bunch of fucking landmines.

pffffffffft

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 3:00 PM

okay, then, onwards to episode 5!

err

6

oops

oh

oh god

...

holy fuck

I just... sigh

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 4:15 PM

ahem

on to episode 7, now!

pfffffffffffffffffffft

of course that's how they don't die.

I mean, it makes sense but

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 5:24 PM

I keep taking too long in between episode

oh well

NO

NO TUTORIAL PROGRAMS

THEY KILL

dammittt

But... this facility... was for the freelancer program?

Huh

A bunker?

Huh.

All of the stuff for the training simulations for the freelancers, I see...

wait, wait, hold the fuck up. There's regulation colored helmets here. This... that's fucking suspicious.

...gumball mcjones

pffffffffffffffffft

omg

I mean. The state name idea seems about fucking right

seriously, the freelancer project couldn't have thought of... anything better?

get blown up, get blown up, there's like

a million landmines here, get blown the fuck up

............what?

That random fucking person... wait a minute... CT... isn't that the abbreviation for Connecticut? ...that's seriously how you spell connecticut?

wow

who knew

wha? Epsilon-Church, what are you looking for?

pffffffffffffffffffft

I wonder why they hadn't thought of that at first

It woulda saved some trouble

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

...one of those translator balls?

I can't believe the callbacks here

omg

So it turns out Shisno is a real insult!

TEX?!

OH MY GOD

OH MY GODD

HOLY FUCK

Also, the CGI there for the reveal was... pretty damn awesome, gonna be blunt

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:00 PM

The CGI only gets better

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:00 PM

Wooo, that's nice to hear!(edited)

shut up, FILSS, it would not be wonderful if they die.

IT WOULD BE FUCKING HORRIBLE

OH MY GOD, YAY FOR MORE CGI AND OH SHIT

OH MY GOD

OH MY FUCKING GOD, THAT WAS AWESOME

GUYS, DO NOT ATTACK TUCKER! HE JUST HAS THE MISFORTUNE OF BEING SUBJECT OF THIS PARTICULAR RUNNING GAG

OH MY GOD!

OH MY GOD

HOLY FUCK

THAT EPISODE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

That was, without a doubt, the best fight scene I've seen so far. Or, at least, the coolest-looking.

And oh my god

That ending shot

OH MY GOD

 1/31/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 4:12 PM

SO

On to episode 11!

Well, I mean, this is like. The one context it is physically possible.

...I wonder what consequences this is gonna have

ohhhh, who knew

Washington, by all means, I should be angry with you. You killed Donut and Lopez! But... you just get so many fucking good lines, and I can kinda understand your anger and

ugh

you're fucking kidding me. So medics get overtime. Who knew?

I mean, I can understand exactly why Doc doesn't want to go in a cave, last time he was, Omega jumped to him, after all.

so... this is what it's like when an AI's operator gets knocked out/murdered. Neat.

no, really, why did you two bring Doc?

I know you had a reason but

I can't remember either!

best bubbles-Today at 4:28 PM

Wash is one of my favorite characters

He's really well-written

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 4:29 PM

Yeah, he is

Ohhhhh, hi there previous Epsilon-body.

Shame you're completely irrelevant right now because... well, reasons.

I do! I want to know! Granted, I think I can figure it our via context clues but

I still wanna know!

I mean. It's pretty impossible to track... anything in the desert.

it's a fucking desert. I presume the winds have been moving sand around and concealing tracks and shit every fucking minute.

ah, good old fashioned blackmail

oh my fucking god, the heat signature thing worked

...that'd be Lima Syndrom, for like, the inverse of Stolkholm Syndrome, right?

best bubbles-Today at 4:50 PM

Yep

Where captors develop positive feelings for their captives

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 4:53 PM

...I'm not surprised that Church isn't on the Psych Eval list. But Tex? Wait... oh. Oh, wait a fucking minute. She's an AI too, isn't she?

I am genuinely curious about the Director's journal. I want to see what the entries are.

hmm... a byproduct? I have a stupid-ass theory. that I already know the truth of because I may have read TVTropes on this a little while back

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 5:00 PM

lmao

why

no slacker should have invisibility powers

this is like

the biggest recipe for disaster... ever.

what

so, the vision things weren't about Valhalla... but this place?

what

Oh god.

It's like everywhere I turn, the Freelancer project just gets more fucked up.

But, I have to say, props to Tex for leading the break-in and a rescue mission.

oh... damn

i just

damn

dammit

We gave Grif super speed

Holy fucking

lmao

this was a horrible idea

...okay, I think the super-speed thing's off.

episode 17 description: "Simmons has the Blue Army data restored, while Grif and Simmons find out important information about the Red and Blue bases."

Important information, oh gee, I wonder what that means besides probably what we were told 2 seasons ago.

my god. No way to deny it all being a simulation now.

The whole time-travel bullshit was Scenario 3.

oh...

oh, damn.

damn...

Tex, no. NO

This is a bad plan.

I've only heard two sentences of it, but

very

bad

plan

best bubbles-Today at 5:42 PM

It's not a plan

But it's a perfect plan

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 5:42 PM

TEX, WHAT THE FUCK

DAMMIT, LADY

angery noises because fucking hell, lady

And now we've got even more trouble a-coming

JOY OF JOYS

Well, at least the crew back at the old freelancer base have received the alarm for Epsilon being hurt.'

That speech.

That speech was fucking amazing.

I'm fucking inspired by it.

And I mean, it began with a call-back then grew into something so... so awesomer.

best bubbles-Today at 5:51 PM

Oh, Sarge's speech?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 5:51 PM

YEAH

best bubbles-Today at 5:51 PM

That is one of my favorite moments in the entire series

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:51 PM

Sarge's speech is the third best speech in the show

Church claims both of the other two, which you'll see in future seasons

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 5:57 PM

...what is Grif going to drive, anyways?

Hmm, guess I'll find out

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:01 PM

dammit, Doc!

My thoughts exactly, Wash.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:03 PM

Anya, once you finish season 10 I have an au idea to share with you

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:03 PM

OH FUCK, TEX

OH FUCK

Also, as soon as I finish Season 10, I will be happy to hear the idea.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:04 PM

Fuck Tex? I bet church says that a lot

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:04 PM

V...

whyyyyyy

lol

but

pffffffffffft

nope, can't help but laugh

Dammit, Meta's gone rogue to... very little surprise, honestly.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

YESSSSS

WOHOOOO

oh boy

This is gonna be a rough landing

omg

That line... fucking perfect

Cavalry's arrived in all their... how the fuck are they not dead yet glory.

Oh my god... oh wow.

That... that's horrible. Tex... all the versions of her... at the end of the day, they're like: The living version of eventual failure.

Oh my god.

oh fuck

best bubbles-Today at 6:11 PM

Based on a memory of someone who failed

Always destined to fail

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:12 PM

And now I'm almost at the end of Season 8

One more episode to go

DAMMIT, GRIF

DON'T YOU REMEMBER THE FUCKING

CODE WORD

No

NO

NO, NONONONO

GRIF

oh thank god, he's alive

Epsilon... please, don't.

EPSILON, NO

AND... OH FUCK, WASH

BUT ALSO

OH FUCK

JUST... OH FUCK IN GENERAL

no

epsilon... what have you done?

I... I can't believe it.

Wash... I

wow.

wait, no.

He just took Church's armor and put yellow guards and shit on it.

Epsilon... good luck on your journey to find her.

And... I'm glad to see Blood Gulch again, even if it's not the one I called home for an entire 5 seasons.

Oh my god.

That... those were some of the good memories. ...I can see why.

And... I finished Season 8

I finished the Recollection saga.

best bubbles-Today at 6:26 PM

You know a lot of people have said that season 8 felt like it would've been a good way to end the series if they wanted

And I agree

But I'm also glad they kept going

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 6:27 PM

I am too. It gives me more shit to watch.

Yay bingeing...

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:07 PM

screw it, if I just focus on binging the next few days, I'll be able to fit in Season 9.

Let's go!

Oh, Epsilon, we know already. It's oky, buddy.

pffffffffhahaha

Oh, poor, poor Epsilon.

wait, what

So that's why it's called the Project Freelancer arc. WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE

I JUST

I SAW SOME FAMILIAR FUCKING CODE NAMES ON THAT BOARD OVER THERE

So, I'm guessing half of Season 9 will be spent in not-Blood Gulch, while the other half will be in the past, and 100% of the time, I'm wondering what the hell the actual Blood Gulch crew is doing?

OH MY GOD

SOUTH?!

NORTH?!

...it's nice to hear your voice, North Dakota, first time I saw you, you were... you were a corpse.

...Charon Industries, huh? I'll remember that name, it seems important.

oh, shit, they're surrounded.

I am completely unconcerned for them.

Because... I know they'll both live through it.

BUT DAMN WAS THAT ACTION COOL

That.

Was.

Awesome.

And noooooo

I don't want to leave the past...

Send me back to the cool...

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:32 PM

Recognise the singer for the music?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:33 PM

...should I have?

Wait... was that Casey Lee Williams?

ALSO, YAY, BACK IN THE PAST!

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:33 PM

Yup

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:33 PM

So... she's Agent Carolina, huh?

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:34 PM

Shares a VA with Pyrrha

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:34 PM

.......

WHAT

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:35 PM

Wash also shares a VA with Ozpi n

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:35 PM

...

...................................

WHAT THE FUCK

YOU REALLY WAITED THAT LONG TO TELL ME THAT?!

HOLY FUCK

WHAT THE

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:36 PM

RT has some serious talent under their belt

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:36 PM

No shitting

what the fuck

SOMEONE--NORTH, IN FACT--- TOOK OFF HIS HELMET

THIS IS LIKE, THE FIRST OR SECOND FACE I'VE SEEN IN THE ENTIRE SERIES

I FORGOT HOW IT FEELS TO SEE A FACE AND NOT A HELMET

HOLY SHIT

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:39 PM

I love the past segments in 9 and 10

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:39 PM

oh

my

god

that was... that was stunning

Mother of Invention, huh?

NO!

I

WHY

I LIKE THE PAST

REALLY, I FIND THE EPSILON GULCH SEGMENTS FUNNY BUT

THAT'S ABOUT IT

also mildly horrifying because everything's fucking not right with Epsilon-Gulch Red Team but

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:42 PM

The freelancer arcs in this season are argyably more entertaining than the scenes in epsilon

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:42 PM

...arguably? More like probably.

I mean, at least Blue's accurate

Well... this speeds things up slightly. And no casualties yet!

...hopefully

i'm dying inside

I just

Dying

Inside

...I just fucking realized what's going on. Epsilon-Simmons took what Epsilon said to heart. I... I'm proud of him.

...actually, wait

Damntastic Despair-Today at 8:49 PM

I cannot wait until you get to the scene that has one of my favourite musical numbers in the season

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 8:49 PM

hmmm

I'll keep that in mind.

Oh thank god, they're going back to normal.

OH, HEY, WE'RE BACK TO THE PAST, WOOO

I dunno know if it's just the lighting but. South may have dyed the tips of her hair pink.

 2/1/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 1:26 PM

and we're back

...that was weird

What the hell is up with these earthquakes?

Well, that actually does make sense.

I guess

can we go back to the past again, please?

I mean. This series does have a compilation movie. I'm watching the broken up into chunks form of it right now!

Sure, all you guys do half the time is stand around and talk but

Still funny as all hel--wait a minute, was the grenade there before?

SON OF A BITCH

Oh, hey, we're back in the past, woo!

A new agent? Going up against... two names I recognize, and one I feel I should?

Hmmmmmmm

oh my god

OH MY GOD

TEX?!

IS THAT YOU?

I... I just saw this conversation, can we get to the ass-kicking?

oh my god, Wash used to be so awkward

Wait... Oh god. I probably should've made this connection but... This guy I feel I should know, Maine... he has what will be Meta's armor. So, I'm just gonna jump to a conclusion real quick.

Oh

My

God

TEX JUST KICKED SOME ASS

THAT WAS AWESOME

They just... Dammit Wyoming.

Dammit Maine.

Live ammo?

Really?

OH GOD

YORK

...I don't know why I'm concerned, because I know he lives until Out of Mind but

OH GOD

...They almost got a teammate killed. I don't care if it's "adaptability" or "ingenuity", it's still fucking horrible.

My thoughts exactly, Tex. Bunch of idiots indeed. That's part of why I love them!

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 2:04 PM

...I love the blood gulch crew, or well, in this case memories of them, really I do, but... there's shit going down in the past, can we PLEASE focus on that?

wait. wait a minute

Puma Battery

Really?

omg

pfffffffffffft

you know... you could just say... Smith Anderson. Smith is a first name, after all.

oh

oh boy

YES, BACK TO THE PASTTT

Oh. Oh my god. It's... the Alpha. It's Church, even if it isn't quite technically but.

God, how I've missed you.

I am pumped up for this heist.

pfffffffffffffffft

Lopez is back to being a freaking head again

YES

BACK TO THE PAST WOOOOOOOOOOOOO

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I DON'T CARE ABOUT EPSILON-GULCHHH

JUST LEMME STAY IN THE PAST WHERE SHIT'S COOL

I just

pfffffft

can't fucking believe this

you really don't have more to say about him?

Any of you?

Alright then, time to steal a sarcophagus! ...but why are we stealing it, again? Eh.

Oh my god, Maine and Wash both grabbed weapons. And the nod they give each other, holy shit I feel sad now.

...what?

What the hell is that guy who Carolina and Wash are up against now?!

Pffffffffffft

Ahahaha! This is awesome!

OH MY GOD

THAT ENTIRE SCENE

AWESOME

YAY MAINE, COMING IN WITH THAT WARTHOG!

AND THE FALLING TOWARDS THE SKY ACCOMPANYING IT?

MMHMM

I LIKE

THAT WAS FUCKING BRILLIANT

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I DON'T WANNA LEAVE THE PAST!

IT'S COOL!

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 3:00 PM

well, that was easy

pfffffft

lmao

this is a terrible, terrible plan

WOOO BACK IN THE PAST

oh my GOD

THAT WAS FUCKING

BADASS

ughhhhhhh

I keep forgetting that the Epsilon-Gulch plot is a thing whenever I watch the freelancer plot.

And there's always a feeling of despair whenever I'm brought back to that reality

WOOO

BACK TO THE PAST!

wait... so the Super Speed enhancement... used to be Carolina's, huh.

THAT WAS AMAZING

aw, damn. Back to Epsilon-Gulch...

pfffffft

i take it back, this is hilarious.

The plan even worked!

lmfao

Hi again, Andy. I can't really say I missed you.

...There's only so many hits this fourth wall can take, guys. Be careful with it, it's still dealing with the damage dealt to it by other shit.

Grif, seriously, the fourth wall is fragile

And that timing was utterly perfect!

Okay then, back to the past!

oh no

oh no

It's begun

NONONONO

augh

no

no

Oh... oh god.

Delta... hi, man. It's nice to see you.

but...

augh

no

...time for Episode 19.

...and things are getting worse.

everything's falling apart now.

Yay.

omfg

Andy... didn't you have one job as a bomb?

wow

i'm impressed.

...I think you guys are that cool and interesting.

I mean, that's not helping your chances of not dying but.

Just saying what I think.

BACK TO THE PAST AND--OH HEY

THAT'S YORK'S FACE, HUH? NEAT

...CT? What are you doing?

And dammit

sigh

Also, the subtitles for this one had small snarky comments in * a form like this *

it was nice

Last episode of Season 9.

...the world shattering... doesn't look how I thought it would.

Anya should get back to bingeing-Today at 4:04 PM

oh

Oh my god. She's gone.

...what

CABOOSE?!

SARGE!

oh

oh god.

That's so sweet of them!

The one time I don't wanna go back to the past.

Dammit.

Well, that was short

Thanks for bringing us back to the present!

CAROLINA?!

WAIT A MINUTE... DIDN'T TEX, THE ORIGINAL TEX, BACK IN BLOOD GULCH SAY YOU DIED?!

Also, That's not Alpha. Alpha... died. You're talking to Epsilon.

also, also, I am all for killing the Director. He deserves it.

And that's how Season 9 ends. Glad I got my goal done.

 2/05/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 3:45 PM

ahem. So, I have some shit to watch. And I have time to watch it all. Time to watch the last two miniseries I need to watch before getting to Season 10.

First off is MIA

Let's go.

woooooooooooooooooo

Oh god. That's the Blood Gulch Chronicles intro music.

I've missed it. But why is it playing?

Okay... where the hell is Grif?

lmfao

It occurs to me that this is a surprisingly longer miniseries

6 parts

that's long for a miniseries

Oh fucking hell, who kidnapped Grif?

lmfao

I have no idea when in the timeline this is supposed to take place and I don't care because it's too fucking funny

wait what

NO

DON'T CALL COMMAND

I'm pretty sure the proper term for doing reconnaissance is... actually, iunno

lmfao

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:01 PM

holy mcfuck

hi Vic

haven't seen you in... forever

Is the them being terrible at everything really that much of a surprise? I mean, this seems to be pre-badass-levels-taken BGC

i'm just lmao in the background here, don't mind me

i'm kinda worried now because A. I seriously doubt that Blue Team has anything to do with the kidnapping and B. Didn't the ransom note say that if Command was contacted, Simmons would be kidnapped next?

...oh shitako

...Sarge, you've confused me now.

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:13 PM

I don’t think I’ve seen this miniseries

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:13 PM

Go watch it.

join me in this

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:18 PM

Yeah, Church, you’re st fault for the Tetris scenario here

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:19 PM

OMG

"Well, what can you do, casting is expensive, shut your mouth."

lmfao

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:23 PM

Oh my god Tucker

‘That would be lame, I try not to say lame things on the off chance there might be a girl nearby”

Yes Caboose

That is exactly what is happening

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:26 PM

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

Now I kinda wonder... does the Director has a shit of an aim as Alpha and Epsilon?

lmao

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:28 PM

Doc returns

Yay

Also that shade they threw at Vegans

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:28 PM

ikr?

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

lmao

lmao

holy fuck, the two hours later thing makes its return after like 7 seasons

and 3 2/3 miniseries

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:32 PM

Oh, Caboose

You’re too precious

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:33 PM

I mean, I'm pretty sure that the BGC is one fucking team by this point in the show. So, does it really matter?

lmfao

OH NO

NOT HERE AGAIN

OH GOD

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I DIDN'T WANT TO EVER REMEMBER THE FUCKING ZEALOTS

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

best bubbles-Last Monday at 4:36 PM

AND YOU WILL WORSHIP ME AS THOUGH I WERE A GOD

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:36 PM

scared scooting away

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:36 PM

THE GRUNTS

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:36 PM

but seriously though: Where and when on the timeline IS this?

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

omg

Oh fuck, there's a password?!

SERIOUSLY?!

UGH

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:39 PM

I think it’s a previous version of the epsilon unit

Or maybe I’m just assuming that because it’s made in reach

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:41 PM

i mean, that's a smart assumption.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

OMG

OF COURSE IT'S THE PASSWORD

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:42 PM

Caboose

You are adorable

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:44 PM

omg

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

so... it's a preview for a ransom. Sure, that makes logical sense in every shape and form

sarcasm levels for Anya: 99%

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 4:46 PM

Of course

Of course that’s how this ends

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 4:47 PM

oh no fucking shit, whoever made the note has Grif!

OH MY GOD

LMFAO

Well, at least we know Grif's okay!

...And Donut too, I guess.

Time for the miniseries with a longer name I can't be bothered to type!

lmfao

that is a good question. I'm just hoping the answer is less mildly horrific than the reason there'd be two armies made up of imcompetant people fighting in a canyon in the middle of nowhere.

..actually, the "why is there a military base in the middle of a canyon" question has an answer. It's... it's not a particularly pleasant answer.

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 5:04 PM

OMG

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

HOLY FUCK

I mean, driving through a metal wall does seem impossible but... what material was the thing that Grif drove through in s8 e3?

...now that I think about it, that was rock.

never mind, this is a stupid idea

well, there goes the Warthog.

lmfao

Welp, that settles who gets the Helicopter. The Reds do.(edited)

for some reason, I'm having flashbacks.

lmao

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffahahahaha

Okay, time to stop trying to hide from my work

Season 10 bingeing is... go!

So... we're in the past... yet Grifball exists... UM?!

THAT'S ANACHRONIC

Hi, Delta!

And hi, York!

Wait... oh shit, seems the implantation process has started or something

Or at least, the partnering up of the Freelancers and AIs have.

pffhaha

OH MY GOD

HOLY SHIT

...what's the name of the song playing?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

But also YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSs

WOOO

TO THE ACTUAL PRESENT

epsilon, do not fly into a rage

do NOT

...Blue Team may or may not have... adopted Washington as one of their own while you were away, Epsilon.

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 8:00 PM

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

omg

...well, I mean, he can't see or hear me so... fuck it. Still calling him Epsilon.

WAIT WHAT

WHAT'S HAPPENING?

AND BACK TO THE PAST!

...I love 479-er. So much.

"Out of the frying pan, and into the shit."

So... Carolina... "apparently" gave up her AI. So, this is after the implantation process.

Probably.

I think.

...What happened to Georgia?

OMG

"Why do cars hate me?"

That is a good question, Wash.

THAT WAS MCFUCKING AWESOME

...CT? What the hell are you doing?

CT? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?

And back to the present!

WOOO!

...That's Simmons' choice of music for when he drives the Warthog.

I think I see why we let Grif drive.

and they're still going at it like an old married couple, I see.

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 8:18 PM

Didn't you listen to the song? Georgia's underneath a bus

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 8:18 PM

pfffffffffffffffffft

fair enough

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 8:19 PM

and Grif and Simmons are an old married couple, nobody can convince me otherwise(edited)

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 8:19 PM

same tho

i mean, come on. Everyone can see it.

Damntastic Despair-Last Monday at 8:20 PM

also what was the song you mentioned earlier?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 8:20 PM

York was falling out of such and such ship.

First Episode.

oh, Carolina... you really didn't know what you were getting, did you?

OH, HEY, BACK TO THE PAST!

Hi, York!

...That was a rough landing, damn

Same tho, Wash. Because I doubt Georgia's just under a bus.

Oh god... CT was dating that guy... and she's going with him. Where are they going?!

And back to the present!

DAMMIT

WHERE'S EPSILON

Oh my god! He's hitching a ride! In Tucker's AI Storage unit!

Holy shit!

or... just his storage unit

eh

meh Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 8:41 PM

THE WORST TIMING, DIRECTOR

FUCK YOU

pffffffffffffffffft

I love you, Delta. You are amazing.

THAT WAS AWESOME!

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT!

Because getting dragged along is pretty much the only way you guys will be plot important!

I mean. It's the truth.

oh goddammit, where did the others go.

what are you two doing?

Oh, hey, this episode has a callback for a name!

...what?

The AI Maine got partnered with... used to be Carolina's?

Is that why she gave it/them up?

...Sigma. Okay.

dammit, Tucker!

DAMMIT, TUCKER!

Carolina, holy fucking shit can you be any more icy

AND BACK TO THE PAST!

WOAH, HOLY SHIT, IS THAT EVERYONE WITH THEIR HELMETS OFF?!

LEMME SEE AGAIN QUICK!

Dammit, we don't get to see Wash's face yet

Why the hell is Sigma burning?

No, really. Why the hell does Sigma look like that?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:00 PM

4 stages of Rampancy... why the hell do I have a feeling that this is where Halo shit comes in

Would someone be willing to explain it to me?

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:03 PM

Well, you remember how they said all AI's are based on people?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:03 PM

yes

of course i do

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:03 PM

That's Halo canon as well

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:03 PM

Huh

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:04 PM

But as the AI ages, they kinda

Go crazy

rampancy is where they begin to degenerate mentally

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:05 PM

ohhhh

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:06 PM

Many of them start to see themselves as superior to their creators

They also become violent and paranoid

In the end, the go the Skynet route

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:06 PM

oooooooo

oof

yyyyikes

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:07 PM

Yep

You can think of it like an AI version of rabies

Only brought on by age

And for most AI, that age is around seven years

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:08 PM

hmmm

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:09 PM

In Halo canon, the UNSC has a regulation for dealing with this called Final Dispensation

Basically AI euthanasia

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:09 PM

jesus

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:09 PM

Yep

Which, in hindsight, makes Project Freelancer seem all the most dangerous

Imagine if they got their hands on a bunch of smart AI's instead of fragments

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:11 PM

oh fuck

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:12 PM

Yeah

Don't even wanna think about that

if the mess they were already in was caused by fragments

God, would that mean they'd all become like the Meta?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:14 PM

okay, I think that's enough thinking about that for tonight!

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:14 PM

Yeah, bad thoughts ^^;

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:19 PM

okay, enough studying rampancy and AI, time to get back to binging!

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:20 PM

Basically, you could rename it Skynet Syndrome : P

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:20 PM

pfffft

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT!

dammit, Carolina! You're just. You're making all the rookie mistakes with interacting with this crew, omg!

It's oddly amazing to watch

pffffft

wait, what? Oh, yeah, I guess you guys are criminals now because of the whole rescuing Epsilon thing.

huh

episode 7 is a go!

AND BACK TO THE PAST!

THE CHAIRMAN!

OH MY GOD

I'M HAVING FLASHBACKS TO RECONSTRUCTION NOW

Malcolm Hargrove, huh.

oh no

oh...

...I've never gotten a good look at Carolina's eyes before. That shade of green... it reminds me of fresh growing mint, almost.(edited)

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT

And this is our friendly reminder that Epsilon has the memories of a shit-ton of people

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:39 PM

Carolina: mint flavor

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:39 PM

lol

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:39 PM

Washington: salt flavor

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:39 PM

lmfao

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:39 PM

really though, when you look back at how Wash used to be compared to today

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:40 PM

yeah

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:40 PM

He was almost like the caboose of project freelancer

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:40 PM

speaking of the past, we're back in it!

HOLY SHIT

Alpha... Church, the one I've known for 6 fucking seasons--has been name-dropped

And Wash, please, oh please take off the helmet! Everyone else has! Please! I want to see what you look like under the helmet instead of coming up with shitty headcanons for what you look like!

Wash... are you eating a banana with the helmet on?!

best bubbles-Last Monday at 9:44 PM

Yes

yes he is

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 9:45 PM

OH MY GOD

ROOSTER TEETH, WTF

WHYYY

WHY ARE YOU FUCKING WITH US

PLEASE, I JUST WANNA SEE WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

and the episode's over

and i'm still mildly upset because

augh

you guys know

Also... who was the guy spying on CT and her group with Wyoming?

He had Blue armor, but not like--sim trooper regulation blue.

a more... cobalt-ish shade of blue

ahahahaha

The mcfucking callbacks here!

lmfao

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT AND OH DAMMIT

YAY, BACK TO THE MCFUCKING DESERT

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:00 PM

pfffft

AND BACK TO THE PAST, WOW WAS THAT SHORT

I love you, 479-er.

yep

My heart officially belongs to 479-er and Delta... as well as all the BGC... and Epsilon... and Wash... and a bunch of characters not even from this series and--well, I have a big heart, okay? There's enough to go around!

RIP, attempted reference/call forward

rip

THAT WAS COOL

woah boy

It's official. Cars, Warthogs in particular, have some sort of grudge against Wash.

oh my god

whatever's about to happen... it's gonna be epic

there is just no way, no fucking how I can trust Sigma. I mean... just look at the guy! He radiates untrustworthiness, holy shit

well, that was awesome

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT

best bubbles-Last Monday at 10:26 PM

He's also voiced by Elijah Wood

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:27 PM

Huh.

best bubbles-Last Monday at 10:27 PM

Frodo is now a flaming AI

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:27 PM

wait, what

w h a t

friendenemepanion

did i type that right?

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

subtle call-back, i see

omg

We're gonna put Epsilon.. inside a motorcycle... okay, sure

AND BACK TO THE PAST

Oh shit, hi, Wyoming!

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

oh god

I forgot he likes knock-knock jokes

oh, hi, Tex

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT

no, wait, never mind.

BACK TO THE PAST

...did we really need to leave?

woah

The unidentified Cobalt just pulled an ax out of his arm.

woah

WOAH

Damn, "Cobalt"'s pretty awesome!

...I feel bad for CT. She clearly's gotten some idea of the shit that is going on.

NO

wOAH

CT...

CT!

No

I'm actually... crying

this... how is this the first time this show's brought me to tears?

best bubbles-Last Monday at 10:46 PM

hugs

Emotions are complicated

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:48 PM

oh

so... that's why we returned to the desert... okay then

why is it now that i get to be punched in the gut by this show, though? There were... there were other moments, so many other moments.

so why now?

Edventure Quest-Last Monday at 10:52 PM

What's happening

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:52 PM

ct

i just finished season 10, episode 10

Edventure Quest-Last Monday at 10:55 PM

Oh- ;;

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Monday at 10:55 PM

imma need some time to... to think on all this.

And it's almost 11, I should have gone to sleep long ago anyways.

Edventure Quest-Last Monday at 11:03 PM

Get some rest okay?

 2/06/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 9:09 AM

Okay so. I've had some time, time to get back to binging.

Time for Episode 11, Out of Body

And we're in the present!

I believe Epsilon's former body of residence is probably still in the old Freelancer Training Building.

hmmmm

AND BACK TO THE PAST WHERE OH, LOOK

MORE RECONSTRUCTION FLASHABCKS

HOLY MCSHIT

YORK AND NORTH ARE DRESSED IN SOMETHING THAT ISN'T A UNIFORM OR A SUIT OF ARMOR

THIS IS

THIS IS FUCKING AMAZING

yeah... two people in the same head... I can see how that'd be an experience.

Huh, the name of the next episode is also the name of the first miniseries I had to watch.

That's... a thing.

Oh.

OH NO

AUGH

we're back to the present and...

there's the fucking intro chords for reconstruction.

and recovery one, too, i guess

damn

oh god

augh

omg

oh

oh no

oh god

oh god.

that's the most i've ever cried because of this show.

what... what did she say to him, anyways?

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I think I like Carolina now

And so... now we're going back to Valhalla.

A lot of things are keys in this series, apparently.

lmao

AND BACK TO THE PAST

hi Gamma... nice to see you?

well, I mean, I'm pretty sure Tex is doing most of the work. She's a bit of a badass, after all.

oooooooooooooooooooo

catfight, catfight

dammit, Carolina, you think you know. But you don't

DAMMIT, CAROLINA

dammit, Carolina.

...never mind, I'm pretty sure South is the actual embodiment of rage, Omega can just pack up and go home.

Um... is that supposed to be a call-forward or is it oddly fitting just to hear Wash say recovery one?

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT

and...

that was short

BACK TO THE PAST

hoo bo y

this is going to be a fight, alright

ah fuck

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 10:01 AM

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT

...what?

what?

This... something's off. But... in a good way.

ahahahahAAHAHAHAAHAHA

OH MY GOD

DONUT'S ALIVE?!

OH

MY

GOD

lmfao

What the hell do you mean, "might be"? They are

AND BACK TO THE PAST!

oh god.

freelancer's started unraveling.

good

I have never, ever hated the Director like I do right(edited)

now

what the shit

there's just... an empty hole inside of me... no wait, there's the anger

AND BACK TO THE PRESENT, WHERE I WILL HOPEFULLY FORGET EVERY SHITTY THING I JUST SAW BECAUSE

GOD

And back to the past, and I didn't forget, which sucks

Oh god

OH GOD NO

NO

CT... you... you were incredible.

and...

oh god

oh no

so... we know where to find the director.

Good.

He needs to pay.

Edventure Quest-Last Tuesday at 10:33 AM

Good Anya, give into the darkness.

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 10:35 AM

I can't see a reason why, for any of his crimes. He couldn't let go. But that is no reason to drag innocent fucking people into his shit. That is no reason to make an AI copy of his personality, then put that AI through countless horrible scenarios just to break him apart. THAT IS NO GODAMN REASON TO DO THE THINGS HE'S DONE

AND THAT? THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME HATE HIM SO MUCH

I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY SOME ASSHOLES DO WHAT THEY DO. I CAN TRY AND MAKE SENSE OF THE MOTIVES BEHIND THE SHIT OF XEHANORT AND JUNKO. BUT DOING SUCH

SUCH HORRIBLE THINGS? WITH NO GOOD, EXPLAINABLE REASON?!

THAT'S FUCKING IT

THE DIRECTOR NEEDS. TO. DIE.

i don't think i've ever hated so much.

Edventure Quest-Last Tuesday at 10:37 AM

But what about the reds and blues?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 10:39 AM

...At the end of the day, they're victims of all this bullshit as well. And who's to say that the use of Sim Troopers started with the Director?! But, yeah, they're fucking victims of his bullshit too. ...I wish I could say I could understand why the director would go off a slope, and nearly drag everyone else down with him.

BUT I CAN'T

AND I FUCKING

...i just

I need some time to clear my head of this rage

maybe punch a wall or something.

okay, i've punched a wall a couple of times.

it did not help.

just makes my hand hurt

god, do i hate that man

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:23 PM

Man, if you hate the director this much...

I can't wait until you get to season 15

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 3:24 PM

why?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 3:24 PM

Well, I had a very similar rage-filled reaction to the main antagonist of that season

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 3:24 PM

huh.

that bodes fucking well

also, I have now cleared my head of the unstoppable anger

let's try and finish the season.

And they've started the AI removal process after Wash had Epsilon for a few days.

at least a few days.

I'm pretty sure Omega's the one who piloted the getting the fuck out of there,, tbh.

oh my god. York and Tex are working together... oh god. Are they... they're trying to rescue Alpha?

aaaaand back to the present!

omg

...

wow

that was...

yeah

fuck

this... this is the season where i start fucking crying Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 3:50 PM

of course it goddamn is

i got off easy for the last ten, but now?

ahahaha

here come the fucking tears'

...

yeah, there is nothing i can say here

and back to the past...

jesus fucking christ, how many random soldiers will be voiced by ian and anthony from smosh this season anyways?!

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:00 PM

oh god

she tossed him a lighter

probably the lighter she originally took from him

oh god

the mother of invention just crashed

aUGH

oh god

Church...?

oh

oh god

i'm legit fucking bawling for the... three people curious, fyi

Edventure Quest-Last Tuesday at 4:05 PM

*eyes emoji*

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:05 PM

I'm 10 minutes into episode 19

fuck

Maine, what are you doin---Carolina?!

Is she alright?

OH GOD

META... THE FUCK

episode 19... i finished it

ha

hahaha

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:13 PM

Season 10 does not withold the gut punches

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:13 PM

it is not

it's time for episode 20. I don't think we'll be going back to the past any more.

omg

I forgot Grif kinda, sorta... has the knifle now.

and yes, i am calling it a knifle

if we can call crescent rose a sycfle, then we can call the brute shot a knifle

oh, great. now the UNSC people come.

Fucking joyyyyy

That was easy.

funny. I have this weird feeling.

Like we're never going to see this place again.

and...

oh shit.

It's a horde of Tex.

And we all saw episode 10 of Season 8.

This is going to either suck or be amazing.

Episode 21 time

Oh, hey, CGI in the modern day! That hasn't been seen for a while!

oh shit

CAROLINA!

...oh, look!

HERE COMES THE CAVALRY!

IN ALL THEIR SOMEHOW AWESOME GLORY!

OH MY GOD

IS THAT...

I KNOW THAT MELODY LIKE THE BACK OF MY HAND

OH MY GOD

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

THAT WAS AWESOME

oh come the fuck on, why are we mirroring the dialogue which made me sob not 30 minutes ago

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

that was incredible

and... now it's time.

time for the director... to get what's coming to him.

he needs to pay, alright

...they have... ha ha ha... they have the same eyes.

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:43 PM

Oh man.

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:43 PM

About what?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:43 PM

This is my second favourite scene in RvB

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:45 PM

ha

hahahaha

my god

and i guess.

I guess that the main quest... has ended.

Now what, though?

...Where are we going?

Back to the past?!

Really?!

WAIT, WHAT

CAPTAIN FLOWERS... WAS A FREELANCER?!

AGENT FLORIDA, NO LESS?!

HE'S THE COBALT GUY?!

WHAT THE HELL, THOUGH?

WHAT THE HELL EVEN HAPPENED TO THAT STATE, THOUGH?!

wait what

They fucking

destroyed florida

the state

just for a cover story

Okay, there's horrible

there's terrible

there's a point of no return

But this? This is just incredulous

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 4:51 PM

Project Freelancer: Fucked up.

best bubbles-Last Tuesday at 4:51 PM

I remember how much the reveal mindfucked me

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 4:51 PM

i give up

i give the fuck up on ever understanding anything to do with project freelancer

i just

I already gave up once

I'm doing it again, but with real meaning

ahahaha

Where are we now, guys?

They... we're home.

Ahahaha.

She does sound like a smart lady.

Carolina, Epsilon... good luck, you two.

And it's over.

I finished Season 10 and god was that an emotional wringer(edited)

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:00 PM

Season 11 is a lot less of an emotional roller coaster than Season 10 was

as is Season 12, and most of Season 13

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:00 PM

...most of Season 13

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:00 PM

But yes, now you're at the Chorus Trilogy!

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:00 PM

That... that bodes...

...what were you going to say, V?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:05 PM

i don't think I was going to say anything?

other than The Chorus Trilogy is amazing

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:06 PM

you were typing

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:06 PM

I was? eh, whatever, I don't remember what I was gonna say

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:06 PM

ahh

so, um

What was the AU you wanted to tell me?

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:18 PM

an AU where all the AI are Carolina's flesh and blood siblings

When someone asks why she's named Carolina while all her siblings have names like Alpha, Omega, Epsilon, etc. she responds with "My mom named me."

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:19 PM

PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

We could call that AU: "The one where Carolina is annoyed by her various idiot and jerkass brothers. Constantly."

"The idiot friends of two of them don't help."

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:22 PM

Theta is obviously the youngest sibling

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:22 PM

clearly

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:22 PM

and if anyone ever hurt him, they get all 8 angry siblings coming after them

also, did you pick up on the fact that Beta was Tex?

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:23 PM

yes, I did.

that and TVTropes has spelled it out for me.

It's handy for that.

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:26 PM

it is

so there are two Church Jrs and a Tex Jr. in this AU family

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:27 PM

pfffffffffffffffffffft

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:27 PM

completely ignoring the sexual tension between any incarnations of Church and Tex though, because incest=gross

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:28 PM

yep

i'm not sure I'm ready for Season 11

I know you said it's supposed to be lighter, but...

i'm not sure i'm ready

Edventure Quest-Last Tuesday at 5:37 PM

The Chorus Trilogy won't hurt you...too much

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:37 PM

oh. that makes it all better.

...you know? Life is short. Might as well start it.

Damntastic Despair-Last Tuesday at 5:45 PM

You won't be hit too hard in the gut during Season 11

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 5:46 PM

that's... reassuring.

dammit

So that's what happened.

We got shipwrecked.

Joy.

glorious.

I mean, that is an accurate description of movie trailers nowadays

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 6:02 PM

Oh my god

That organizational chart tho

Anya should get back to bingeing-Last Tuesday at 8:26 PM

http://archiveofourown.org/works/2189811/chapters/4795215

so, I found this

It's good. Really good. I guess I can thank TVTropes for guiding me to it.

 2/07/18

Anya should get back to bingeing-Yesterday at 2:31 PM

Okay so

I have some time before I need to start packing up

Let's see how much of Season 11 I can get through today!

wha?

Who's there?

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS TRAINING COURSE?!

That plan could work, actually!

...we... we really could just cut out the middle man and use the radio transmitter itself?

so...

dammit, Tucker.

yeah...

How long has it fucking been since the ship crashed, anyways?

of fucking course

The next episode's name implies that we're finally going to get a start on getting out of this goddamn canyon-in-a-jungle! WOOOOO

WE'RE GETTING A SIGNAL!

Anya should get back to bingeing-Yesterday at 3:01 PM

of course

sigh

dammit, don't know why I got myself excited there.

so... I

I'm just going to set my things going wrong timer to five seconds.

It seems appropriate.

i'm dying a bit inside.

just a little bit.

Um

...Okay then

Oh goddammit.

holy shitak

...wha?

Who's that?!

 2/10/18

Anya-Today at 12:20 PM

okay i've been putting this off, time for more binging!

Episode 7 time

...that is a good question.

...

i'm going to blame halo game mechanics for that

I would've called it a chameleon then!

ehehehehe

uhh

i'm scared of Freckles

very scared

didn't we already do this in Season 4, dammit?

...

okay, guys, the fourth wall is mcfucking fragile, please don't try and shatter it.

okay... that's the second time we've gone into a random sniper shot, with no logical explanation for who's watching, or why.

I don't have a good feeling about this.

wait wait wait

WHO FORGOT THE MUSIC?!

Anya-Today at 1:00 PM

better

aww man

also... dammit, guys

just... in general

o boy

this is going to be... yeah

oh no

oh no

oh no

lmfao

...wait a fucking minute

....that's Tex's theme

but

what

OH FUCKING HELL

COME ON

YOU DO NOT, ROOSTER TEETH

YOU DO NOT

UGH

...

...no

...you didn't

...that pilot.... that ship was our hope for getting out of this fucking place.

...seriously, please tell me you didn't.

DAMMIT, DONUT

FUCKING

DAMMIT

...huh.

WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU, X-BOX COLORED GUY?!

Anya-Today at 1:28 PM

So... I'm blaming Grif and Tucker for us being stuck here.

best bubbles-Today at 1:28 PM

Valid

Anya-Today at 1:30 PM

wait... does Red Team actually get to carry the plot for a change?! Because if so... fuck yeah!

best bubbles-Today at 1:31 PM

They finally have something to contribute

Anya-Today at 1:32 PM

pfffffffffffft

...hmm?

Oh, it's you. Weird... X-Box guy.

I'm already scared of you.

That's record time

...Locus.

Okay, sure.

best bubbles-Today at 1:34 PM

At first I thought his name was Locust

Anya-Today at 1:34 PM

Wherever we are... we're sure as fuck not alone.

You know, there's a reason I watch with subtitles on. It's mostly to make sure I don't fuck up with the names.

What

you guys have a SIRI here

what

WHAT

THERE'S ANOTHER ONE SPYING ON US

...AND THIS ONE... DOES HE KNOW US?!

I mean, he said, and I quote: "Holy shit. It's actually them."

wha

So... this guy... may know who the Locus fuck is? And... he clearly doesn't like him.

gah

so... the ship... literally broke in half

joy

...where the fuck is the other half, then?

...Grif... I think you might want to back away from that.

best bubbles-Today at 1:43 PM

These guys are not good pilots, are they?

Anya-Today at 1:44 PM

well, yeah, but i'm talking about the weird-ass glowy sticky things

that remind me of bombs

or grenades

and seriously wow, i'm just getting a bad feeling here

we sure they don't do anything except stick?

SON OF A BIT--I knew it.

WHAT THE SHIT

Oh my god! Those things are like mini-teleporters in and out of hammerspace!

HOLY SHIT

or.... teleporter cube

What are you doing, Wash.

WHAT?!

WE HAVE AN INTERNET CONNECTION NOW?!

awwwwww

but still cool

HOLY SHIT, THE CUBES ARE!

I CAN'T BELIEVE I DIDN'T PUT THAT TOGETHER!

HOLY SHIT

Anya-Today at 2:00 PM

WHO ARE YOU, ORANGE STRIPED FUCK

...okay, so maybe you're here to help us

maybe

I'm not sure I trust you just yet

"It's about twenty hours long, and I only enjoy telling it in 5 minute intervals."

Ahem. Our fourth wall is fragile(edited)

And the fourth wall needs to be protected. Please, just listen to me for once.

please

pfffffffffffft

Welp, now we have 3 people to blame for this.

omg

The radio... was turned off.

Wow.

...

what

...what?!

what the fuck?!

oh fuck

...that ship...

It looks familiar

Do you think it's--no, no, the Mother of Invention crashed, it can't be.

I repeat: I am scared of Freckles.

that was so sweet

Anya-Today at 3:03 PM

ah... fuck

...16? No, wait, lemme pull up a count of people I know to be here... that'd be... 11. Who are the other 5?!

OH SHIT

WHAT THE SHIT

WHO THE FUCK WAS AIMING FOR WASH?!

AND, THANK YOU, ORANGE-STRIPED DUDE

...what the shit?!

WHAT THE SHIT?!

WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

Well, I mean... yeah.

Felix... okay then.

NO

WE HAVE NO REAL CLUE

...huh?

Chorus? That's what this place is called?

Well, that makes sense, this is called the Chorus Trilogy after all.

also.... ugh

Welp, that's 4 people to blame for our current situation

I hope you four are proud of yourselves.

...what

Crash-landed in the middle of a civil war.

yay

ughhhh

...were you going to say something, Jake?

best bubbles-Today at 3:18 PM

No, sorry

Typed in the wrong chat ^^;

Anya-Today at 3:18 PM

aaaah

rip

best bubbles-Today at 3:19 PM

Also, crash landing in the middle of a civil war

Sounds just like the BGC, doesn't it?

Anya-Today at 3:19 PM

honestly, yes

it does.

Sooo... One side, the side that's not actively trying to murder us, is called The New Republic. Gotcha.

pfffffffffft

I can't believe it.

The greatest soldiers in the galaxy?

are you sure you're not thinking of... anyone else?!

best bubbles-Today at 3:22 PM

I mean

They did kinda kill several freelancers

Anya-Today at 3:22 PM

...true.

best bubbles-Today at 3:22 PM

Some unintentionally, but still

Anya-Today at 3:23 PM

fair enough

but... the greatest?

I... I have to doubt that, deep down.

soooooooooooo

what you're saying is... time to be part of a rebellion. That we know... very little about.

Sure, why not

But also.... no.

Why?

We're still mcfucking stranded and... again, you're asking the Blood Gulch Crew. Despite what you may think, they're only occasionally competent.

wait what

Ohhhh... you mean the mercenary definition of Freelancer that was used back in Season 1 and never again.

oh

...what?

What do you mean, "about to be hit... hard."?

They... probably aren't.

But, well... they did take down the Meta. And an entire army of Tex. So maybe we won't die after all.

let's prepare for a battle.

....those are the stupidest landmines ever.(edited)

Of all time.

how about we don't try and re-activate the malfunctioning robot who tried to murder everyone?

That seems smart.

welp. seems there's still some problems with the helmet.

yayyyy

Yeah, where are Epsilon and Carolina anyways?

The Federal Army... that's our enemy, it seems.

...shitty name for an opposing side.

...You know what, Felix? I think I may like you yet.

Edventure Quest-Today at 3:49 PM

Pretty chill guy. I like Felix

Anya-Today at 3:51 PM

Well, who knew? Wash is back in... a pretty close replication of his old armor.

Edventure Quest-Today at 3:52 PM

Noice

Anya-Today at 3:53 PM

ah great. I mean... I can understand why Lopez Dos is doing this... kinda. But now is not the goddamn time

Oh look, it is a Robot battle now.

Yay?

OH SHIT

WE GOT LOCUS HERE NOW

AND I'M GOING GUESS MORE ON THE WAY

YEP, DEFINITELY MORE

FUCK

also... where the hell is Doc?

Eh. We'll focus on that later

WE GOT A BATTLE TO FIGHT

WOOOOO

oh

WOOOOOO

Anya-Today at 4:01 PM

AHAHAHAHAHA

WOOOOO

NICE ONE, DONUT!

....dammit Donut.

OH SHIT, NOT

Oh thank god

YAHAHAHA, WOOHOO TUCKER!

...oh crap

OH CRAP

LOPEZ!

WOOO

NO

WASH

SARGE

FUCK YOU, LOCUS!

...what was that?

wait...

we got backup

but... oh no.

oh no no no no

WASH

WASH, PLEASE, COME ON

NO

NO, YOU IDIOT

NO

NO

no

no

nononononono

...

no

...

I

no

Sarge, Donut, Wash, Lopez... we left them all behind.

WE LEFT THEM BEHIND, WE SHOULD HAVE STAYED LONGER

WE DON'T EVEN KNOW IF SARGE IS STILL ALIVE!

...

no

...it's time for the final episode... I guess.

And... hey, wait, is it starting on a call-back to Season 3? I feel like it is.

...So this is the New Republic base.

...no

no

hi, there, Miss Kimball... I guess.

i... i can't believe it.

I don't want to believe it.

They... they can't be dead.

Edventure Quest-Today at 4:17 PM

hugs Shhh

Anya-Today at 4:18 PM

Those fucks have pulled through worse and weirder, they have to be alive!

i

...they have to be

THEY'RE ALIVE

OH THANK FUCK

Well... that makes our course obvious.

I don't know what's going on here. But half of our crew is being held captive by these guys you people call your enemy. So... let's fight this goddamn war.

And the promise of fucking off and getting as far away from Chorus afterwards?! FUCK YEAH

...so... we're putting these 4 in charge of troops. Sure, why the hell not.

So there's a stinger. Let's watch that.

Wait... that crate... why would it need to be recovered?

...Carolina?

CAROLINA?!

HWAT

...that's why you got him to keep them alive.

thanks

BUT ALSO WHAT THE FUCL

Anya-Today at 4:48 PM

I can't believe I just finished Season 11.

I'm like

I'm mcfucking shook to the shookiest degree because

well

a lot of things

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:50 PM

The chorus trilogy only gets better from here

Edventure Quest-Today at 4:50 PM

pats

Things get better

But things get worse.

Anya-Today at 4:50 PM

...

i'm not sure how to respond to either of those because one is things getting better, but things getting worse, and the other is V saying it only gets better from here.

And I don't know how much I trust V

Edventure Quest-Today at 4:52 PM

That's all you get from moi. Take my words as you see fit

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:54 PM

I say better as in the story gets more interesting as it goes on

Anya-Today at 4:54 PM

yeah

that's why i didn't know how to respond to your comment

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:54 PM

Also, VA reference time

Locus: Roman

Kimball: Ruby

And Felix: Jaune

Anya-Today at 4:59 PM

.....

..........

so that's the reason I like Felix so much!

 2/12/18

Anya-Today at 3:41 PM

So like, I'm going to try and complete the next few seasons before I start writing down any more stuff for the AU soooo

Season 12 time!

Wooo!

best bubbles-Today at 3:41 PM

Woo!

Anya-Today at 3:42 PM

Let's go!

Oh god. Of course.

lmao

Heyyy, CGI! Haven't seen that in a whiel

*while

fucking hell, me

I can't fucking believe these guys are captains.

THE PASSWORD WAS PASSWORD, FUCKING OF COURSE

I feel, so, so bad for the New Republic right now.

...I see the problem here.

You're trusting them with plans

Th--nothing they've ever accomplished had any real plans behind the actions! Just spur of the moment tactics that led to them not dying!

Anya-Today at 4:02 PM

Well, that was a thing. On to Episode 2!

Yeahhh, can't believe it took you so long to realize that they are, in fact, kind of dumb.

oh. oh my god.

A fucking lead.

god dammit.

RUN

RUN, YOU GODDAMN IDIOT

well, this all went to hell in a handbasket very fast

son of a bitch

Episode 3 and... hey, isn't this what happened when the Meta was defeated?

Is this referencing how Chekov's Gun works as a trope?

Also... sigh

lol

You know where they are?!

Suicide and a bunch of puppies dying.

I like that analogy for some reason.

5 days...

hoo boy

Episode 4

...how?

...Um. That's a good question.

I don't think there's an answer.

oh my god

we could be... actually training right now

but nope

instead we get this

I'm not even sure I'm surprised

OH MY GOD

I mean, according to the rules of calling dibs... Grif's in charge now.

But... those aren't the best rules to follow so....

let's disregard that.

Felix... standing around and talking is their fucking bread and butter.

I mean, if you want to watch this trainwreck that is these guys, I could just give you the way to the youtube channel

Episode 5

pffffffffffft

Felix, how can you be so ...iunno, yet so lovable?

This is going to be great.

sigh

Time to watch all the ways these 8 fail!

Woo!

lmao

SON OF A BITCHPFFFFFAHAHAHA

 2/13/18

Anya-Today at 4:07 PM

so... I have the time (and lack of people I'm showing the series to in the house) to continue watching Season 12 today!

Let's go

...huh?

Kimball, lady... ya mind explaining?

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 4:13 PM

Whelp, I finished Season 14 of RvB. It had some fun and some feels, BUT NOW I CAN GET TO S15 WHOO!

Anya-Today at 4:13 PM

Oh... oh these kids haven't heard the story of the Blood Gulch Chronicles yet. You don't know about the whole... team-killing fucktard thing. Oh, you four are innocent.

Oh... lmao

I still feel bad for the rebels. They have to put up with... these idiots and their various... yeah.

Oh, great, back to the plot shit.

Oh?

Well, this is going to be interesting...

Woo!

Oh? We're not bringing the other four? Well, I mean, I think I can see why we want to keep them out of this. What we want to do--rescue the others-- isn't part of their fight.

I mean... yeah.

The Federal Army will be expecting actual, real smart fighters trying to get into this base. Not a bunch of lucky idiots who somehow manage to be badass.

Let's do this!

I wonder that on a daily basis.

WOAH, HEY, WHAT'S WITH THE CGI?

...and why does it give me a bad feeling about this?

JESUS FUCK A CORPSE

oh shit

We're almost at the base... almost there.

WHAT

I mean... okay, sure?

GYAH, DEFINITELY WORKED

Unnamed Voice...? Jesus fuck, that's either the subtitler giving no shits or a hint I should be suspicious.

guys... isn't the obvious answer to try and hide?

...you know what, I shouldn't even bother suggesting these plans any more.

lmfao

holy

mcfuck

THERE WASN'T EVEN ANY SNOW THERE!

EVER!

oh shit

I repeat: oh shit

I think worst case scenario is everyone dying.

But, like, my opinion doesn't matter here, so sure, y'all do whatever the fuck you want

There have been worse plans.

...what?

It just opened...

...

Guys?

...What?

what?!

WHAT?!

Caboose, the fourth wall is still fragile

Okay, so, quick recap for those not keeping up with my reactions, I just finished Season 12, Episode 8. Time for a flashback couple of episodes, it seems.

Yeah, sure, Locus, like I'm going to believe a word that come out of your mouth.

Wash, what the hell is happening?

And we're back to the "Wash suffering by account of being the only sane person within 15 miles show"!

Wow. That is not a good officer.

He literally fainted.

...This Emily chick is mildly amazing and mildly frightening.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:55 PM

More VA facts

Doyle is voiced by the same guy who does the voices for both Roman and Locus

Anya-Today at 4:56 PM

what

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:56 PM

and Doctor Gray is voiced by Blake's voice actor

Anya-Today at 4:56 PM

....what

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:56 PM

Yup

as for the 4... privates, I think

Andersmith-Port Jenkins-Yang Palomo-Neptune

I don't think Bitters's VA has a role in RWBY, but I could be wrong

Anya-Today at 4:57 PM

they're lieutenants, actually

but also... wow

holy shit, wow

yes, Doyle, you should've

Anya-Today at 5:00 PM

Oh my fucking god

this guy's a secretary.

...

oh my fucking god

there's competent people to put in charge, there's incompetent people to put in charge

this?

I have no words for this

...FRECKLES!

NO

NO

...

a moment of silence for Freckles...

Also, Locus... I still hate you.

I hate you a lot more right now, in fact.

HOLY SHIT.

HE UNDERSTANDS SPANISH

THIS IS A FUCKING WONDER IN THIS UNIVERSE

So... the moral I've gotten here is... something's off about this war.

We're probably going to find out what.

And back to the present!

oh... oh shit, yeah... it's silent.

That isn't right.

...what the shit

what the shit

...what

oh shit

oh shit

oh fuck

we... we are in some deep, deep fucking shit now

...fuck you, Felix, and fuck you, Locus.

fuck both of you.

hey

hey, Felix.

Have you been tricked into thinking you were sent into the future?

Have you taken down not just two evil AI, but an honest-to-god Freelancer?

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:22 PM

Hey, you got to the bit where Felix reveals his true colors!

Anya-Today at 5:23 PM

Have you fought with the Meta, more than once, and lived to see another day? Hell, have you managed to take that motherfucker out?!

Have you beaten an army of Tex clones?

No?

Then you, however great a mercenary you may be, have no fucking place to talk about being a great soldier.

Also, hi V, yes I have.

actually, as much as it pains me to say it, Locus is right. There are.

And, still paining me to say it, but Locus is right again. You kill people quickly, you don't fucking monologue in their faces, that just gives a Big Damn Heroes moment time to set up.

CAROLINA?!

CAROLINA!

WOOHOOO

Oh, hey, seems Emily Gray is coming along for the ride...

also what the fuck

EPSILON!

YES! YES, I DID MISS YOU!

Okay, so after that, I'm going to stop for today.

Watch 5 a day, I should be done with Season 12 by Thursday for me. Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:34 PM

only five? Wimp. :P

Anya-Today at 5:34 PM

Hey. I watched like, all of Season 3 in one day.

And Season 2, and I think Season One, too.

I think I've done my share of one-sitting-bingeing.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:35 PM

Fair enough

 2/14/18

Anya-Today at 1:50 PM

so looking at the playlist

holy fuck, why are there 33 episodes for Season 13?!

Is that like

a goof or something or is it just genuinely that long???????

holy fuck

so... anyways, bingeing is goooo

And yet another flashback as we see what Epsilon and Carolina have been up to!

ooo, CGI

this is all cool as fuck!

omg

this is fucking amazing!

that was fucking amazing from start to finish and I haven't even reached the end of the episode

Anya-Today at 2:02 PM

That was an awesome episode

And back to the present, where maybe we can finally get some perspective on what the goddamn hell is going on on this planet!

Ohhh, Emily... you do not want to hear this story. It's long and confusing, and I'm not totally sure how to summarize it.

Well, okay, Emily, let's hear your take on these idiots!

yeah, it does. I'm pretty sure Project Freelancer has something to do with all this because... it always does! Even when we don't think it exists, it does! Even when we're pretty sure it's something else entirely, it does!

What did Project Freelancer do this time?

pfffffffffffffft

they had a mcfucking news article about them

holy mcfuck

I mean, yeah. There have definitely been enough plot twists for one lifetime for you guys.

ohhh

oh shit

someone set this up so the ship would crash on Chorus

Damntastic Despair-Today at 2:11 PM

There’s a lot of bonus content in the season 13 playlist, it’s about the average size of an RvB season

Anya-Today at 2:12 PM

ohhhhh

gotcha

...that's what you're focusing on here, okay then... wait, Simmons... what did you do?

pfffffffffffffffffflmao

we are very likely fucked.

that is all I've gotten out of conclusions for our situation today.

we are very likely amazingly fucked.

so, effectively, the Federal Army and New Republic think we're dead. Great. And we're all likely to die anyways. Great.(edited)

fucking hell

So that's why the knifle hasn't shown up!

holy shit the possession trick makes its return after 6 seasons!

Never have I related more to something Caboose has said.

dibs protocol, fuckers

...an IQ of 240?!

Lady, holy fuck, you're like, a genius

woohoo, let's split up gang.

Anya Sarcasm levels: 51%

Felix, my man... I loathe you

Yet I also kinda like you.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 2:36 PM

that's Felix for you

you hate him for what he does

but yet he's still so goddamn charming

Anya-Today at 2:39 PM

Okay, the actual priority for our missions: don't get fucking captured. We aren't going on any more goddamn rescue missions.

oh crap.

what the fuck is this place...

and we're back to Crash Site Bravo.

yay?

and now we're back to the other crash site!

yeah... so fucking creep---wtf

OKAY, WHAT THE FUCK

WHY THE FUCK IS THERE ANOTHER SPACESHIP HOLY FUCK

oh no

oh fuck

ohhhh

fuck

that's a lot of hostiles.

Woo! We have the manifest!

OH NO

oh thank god

So... time to interrogate this Space Pirate. This'll be horrible.

...Everyone's grown from the guys they were back in Blood Gulch. I'm going through the earlier seasons with my parents and... comparing them in Season 1 to them in Season 12... yeah, my god. They've changed.

sigh

goddammit. Our needed files are under lockdown. Yay.

Anya-Today at 3:01 PM

oh boy

this... this is gonna be interesting

...remind me to never get on Dr. Grey's bad side.

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 3:03 PM

Ehehehe-

Anya-Today at 3:04 PM

jesus fuck

...tractor beams?

so, that's why we crashlanded.

okay.

jesus FUCL

wait... so the guys fucking around... probably saved us all.

so... thanks, I guess.

actually, no "I guess" about it, thanks.

your mutual idiocy saved us all from death.

FUCK

WE GOT PROBLEMS

AND A LOT OF THEM INCOMING

...oh no.

...what?

back at the gas station???

wha--how?

oh

Well, I have time today... might as well watch more.

and... fuck, I had almost forgotten. Both sides of the civil war are probably being led into a trap... oh no.

...they're delivering what is practically the same speech, aren't they?

I love the lieutenants.

A lot.

fucking hell, Locus.

fucking hell, Locus and probably Felix too because it seems like you guys are just saying the same things to different sides at this point.

Anya-Today at 4:00 PM

I mean... we're used to it.

One argument ain't going to tear shit apart among this group.

wow

Awww, that was sweet!

wait what

...Felix.

...huh?

So... we've been offered a way out. ...something's fishy about this, really.

and, again, I love the lieutenants.

ugh...

I detest the pirates.

...god, how is a show based off of people standing around and talking so good at making me despise their villains?

...And fucking terrible is apparently our best option.

wait

There's an Option D in this.

We teleport directly to the Capitol, and stop it from there.

Now, I know that sounds even worse than nightmare, butttt

Would anyone be expecting it?

No!

And that's what gives us the advantage!

and...

oh no

Oh come the fuck on

Episode 18 is called "Fed vs New", which sickens me and makes me wonder how I didn't pick up on that before at the same time

Woohoo but also fuck

Oh look, seems like the people of Chorus are about to figure this shit out on their own! Good for them!

dammit

oh fuck

ah\

ahahaha

WOOOO

Something I'd just like to point out here: Wash sounded a bit younger there for a second. He just said, in response to nearly falling off a cliff: "It's not a car, it's a cliff." In what is probably the most panicked tone of voice I've heard from him.

wha... Felix... you're saying that about the one guy in the universe that we know has an Energy Sword. Your chances of not dying are decreasing by the second.

best bubbles-Today at 4:39 PM

Felix needs to learn when to shut his piehole

Anya-Today at 4:39 PM

he does, doesn't he?

You know, I feel like, at a certain point, these two mercenaries... they just manage to make me lose all respect for them. Because A: People change, they learn and grow and become better people, and B: ...okay. I don't have a B. But they're causing mass genocide for no good reason. That's a reason to hate them!

pfffffffffffffffffffffft

Locus, you call yourself a mercenary and a soldier. I'm pretty sure that, at some point, there's a difference between the two.

you know... I think I know why I hate these guys almost as much, if not as much, as I do the Director. Because I'm pretty sure the Director wasn't a sociopath.(edited)

SHIT

WHAT

NO

NO

NONONONONONO

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:45 PM

?

Anya-Today at 4:45 PM

TUCKER

HE JUST GOT FUCKING STABBED IN THE GUT

oh god no

oh god

and back to the capitol... oh god no

oh

oh

oh thank god

Hey, Felix... you still talking shit, I see. Keep talking.

That won't backfire at all.

Heya, Epsilon.

AHAHAHAHA

OH MY GOD

PERFECT!

THE HELMET CAM, OF COURSE

And that monologue while you should've been keeping your eyes on the others? Pffft, Felix, you're making so many fucking mistakes, it's amazing!

perfect

fuck you, mercenaries.

AND OH GOD

TUCKER, PLEASE, PLEASE BE ALRIGHT!

Oh... oh my god.

They've made it to safety.

And the lieutenants have stories of their own to tell

Oh...

oh thank god

he's alright

oh my god

Freckles is a gun now. I completely forgot about that

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:59 PM

FRECKLES

Anya-Today at 5:02 PM

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

ahahahaha

WE'VE GOT THE MANIFEST?!

YEAH AHAHAWOOOHOOO

Charon Industries? Weren't they the people that Project Freelancer was fighting or something?

ohhhhh

yeahhhhhhh

huh

huh?

...hmmmm

Huh?!

Oh, this... this is going to be interesting!

wait... the Chairman?!

That speech was awesome

And I finished Season 12.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:11 PM

Season 13 is coming up

prepare for lighthearted happy funtimes!

Anya-Today at 5:11 PM

...

...

I doubt that.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:11 PM

in all seriousness though Season 13 is great

 2/15/18

Anya-Today at 11:10 AM

so then

Time to start on Season 13!

I'll probably be skipping over most of the side videos, but I think I'll start by watching the trailer for Season 13

OML

Epsilon made a version of the series for the new chairman of blabbity blah

...WHAT

WHAT?!

WHAT?!

AGAIN?!

I... I SWEAR TO GOD IF EPSILON DIES, I MAY--PROBABLY WILL--RIOT

Okay, so now that we're done with the trailer. Time for the actual season

fucking hell, Felix.

hmmm

hey wait a fucking moment. That... that's a full name that we got on your introduction, Price. That's... that's both new and an instant sign that I shouldn't trust you for even a second.

...

what.

what.

Your voice... yeah, I recognize it. You're the Counselor, aren't you?

Yep.

You know what's weird? I'm pretty sure that I know most of his info already, just from watching the prior seasons.

...huh?

who's this other prisoner?

...I have no clue who you are.

but... yeah, no clue.

Oh, hey!

Aaaaand we're now officially back to Chorus!

I assume it's for the same reason none of you guys have been shot yet.

By which I mean, who fucking knows

lmfao

That was a very good breather episode after episode one

and I fucking love it.

Wait... the bubble shield? Really?

yep

that's a bubble shield.

Wait, what? That floating tower thing is an alien temple?

omg

I... I mean, fair enough.

The universe is fucking weird.

WAIT WHAT

HOW THE HELL

ohhhhhhhhh

pfffffffft

Emily? What did you discover?

I mean... yeah, it does. Go... do plot shit, Blue Team. See you guys later.

lmfao

...This base reminds me of somewhere. Can't quite say where but...

It seems familiar.

I have never heard Emily sound so serious before

aaand there it goes.

Anya-Today at 12:01 PM

roflmao

...Yep. No shitting, is this base familiar.

WAIT

OH

MY

GOD

THE TOWER RESPONDED TO THE SWORD

...IS THE SWORD GOING TO BE A KEY AGAIN?!

AHAHAHAHAHA

YES

IT IS

AAAAAH!

OH

W-WAS THAT A FALSE ALARM OR?!

WHAT THE FUCK

oh fuCK

what the fuck

WHAT THE FUCK

WHAT THE SHIT WAS THAT

So... what you're saying is... Tucker accidentally got involved in some alien shit and has to go on a quest of some sort because of it.

Gee, I wonder where I've heard that before.

ya know... might as well watch this PSA. Maybe they'll call out on the show for blatantly using shit from a previous season

...on second thought... nah. I have valuable time

NO

NO

I DON'T WANT TO SEE THESE FUCKS AND... OHHHHH

SHARKFACE?

NOW?!

HUH

Well, some good came out of what happened last episode. Our enemies are down their fancy fucking technology, so the weapons used are on a mostly even playing field.

shit

shit shit shit

Hey. Hey, wait a minute

is that a motherfucking rwby reference right there?

holy mcshit, it is

eh

cool

...holy fuck

FILSS?

Wow, of all the...

wow

WHAT

WHAT THE FUCK

THAT... THAT'S THE META'S ARMOR, ALL RIGHT

AN D FUCK

THERE'S HIS THEME IN THE BACKGROUND, RIGHT NOW

JESUS FUCK

...oh

fuck

they beat us there.

Wow, I like Sharkface.

holy shit

holy shit

Ohhh hey, there you guys are!

...Wash, buddy, I feel like you're about to go into a speech here. Do you seriously think our chances of living through this are that slim?

Anya-Today at 1:01 PM

That's true. The sword thing, I mean. You have to take a few levels of character development to be an unstoppable badass.

wow

I don't think you were even in there a second, Tucker!

Good luck, Carolina...

TEX?!

wait... no, this is some sort of portal fuckery...

BUT ALSO HOLY FUCK, TEX!

ohh

oh god

They were all there.

All of them. If only for a second...

"On break: Will return in FUCK YOU"

beautiful

wait a minute

Oh come on.

Oh come on.

Oh. Come. On.

what

the fuck

is this bullshit

what the fuck

long sigh of giving up in the background from me.

I give up.

I officially give up what hope for mental sanity I had regained the past few seasons. Because... fuck it.

and back to bingeing after watching some of season one with my family

also thinking about how much shit changes... just, in general. wow.

Hey, um, Santa... if all that alien tech was so important.. why the fuck was a sword left out in the middle of goddamn nowhere where any old idiot could stumble upon it and claim it as their own?

I mean, not saying that that didn't turn out in this case butttt

why?

Anya-Today at 2:40 PM

Okayyy

I think I've procrastinated long enough

back to watching

what the fuck

THERE'S MORE THAN ONE "DEFINITELY NOT A KEYBLADE"?!

...Okay, there may be too many temples.

I mean...

one for interior decorating?!

wait a minute...

we need to get to the communication one. ASAP.

jesus fucking christ

That purge thing... thank fuck Tucker is the only one with a "not-keyblade* right now.

OH FUCK

WOOHOO, ENERGY SHIELD!

...oh no,

oh no

I was going to hope for them to be alright but... they don't need it.

...wha?

ohhhh fuck.

fuck

fucking hell

oh fuck

Anya-Today at 3:16 PM

Episode 10 and things... are gonna get worrying. I have a feeling things'll get bad.

...were you going to say something, @Damntastic Despair?(edited)

Damntastic Despair-Today at 3:16 PM

no, accidentially tapped the keyboard as I was sitting down

Anya-Today at 3:16 PM

aaah

rip

that was awesome

...oh no.

I have a bad, bad feeling about all this.

Oh god no.

...WHAT?!

DOYLE GOT THE OTHER SWORD?!

OKAY SURE

AT LEAST IT ISN'T FELIX

.....DOC?!

OH MY GOD

HOW THE FUCK

WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!

y'all are assholes.

Doc... you alri---what the fuck

I

NO

O'MALLEY?!

NONONONO

FUCK THAT SHIT

I THOUGHT WE WERE DONE WITH HIM IN THE CHRONICLES

...I just

why

oh shit

Aahaha! Wooo!

OH MY GOD, IT WAS SLOMO FOR A SECOND!

Oh great, we're going to get tailed by Locus. Wash, did you really have to?

Sooooo... I'm just going to accept Doc as having O'Malley as an actual split personality now. I'll just... accept that.

And... I agree with Emily. They are, indeed, one of the most fascinating groups of individuals I'll ever have the pleasure of meeting.

you guys are the other group(edited)

oh fuck

OH YEAH!

oh no

oh no

CAROLINA

oh god no

nononono

...they'll be fine, right?

T...they have to be, both of them.

friendly reminder that... well, I don't think people remember the whole... can't use it unless you were the first person to activate it thing when it comes to the swords.

ohhhh

oh that's bad.

that's... we're fucked.

Oh, hey, thank fuck. Of course you remember the rules of the sword and its pickiness about who uses it.

Anya-Today at 4:00 PM

OH THANK GOD, EPSILON AND CAROLINA ARE BOTH ALRIGHT!

No. The mercenaries do not. They won't if we keep Doyle from dying, or, if Doyle does die, we get the sword to someone we can trust with it first.

KIMBALL, SHUT.

JUST... JUST SHUT.

THAT SITUATION WENT ONE OF THE BETTER WAYS IT COULD FOR US.

THE MERCENARIES HAVE A SWORD THAT DOESN'T WORK. THEY DON'T KNOW IT DOESN'T WORK. AND WE PREVENTED FURTHER LOSS OF LIVE DURING THAT BATTLE.

WE DID WHAT WE COULD.

SO. JUST. SHUT. FOR. NOW.

well... shit.

...when did this become a sitcom?

you know... I am this close to, after the war is over, shoving some of the Feds and Rebels in a box canyon in the middle of nowhere so that maybe, maybe, they'll learn to get along with the only other fucking people in the neighborhood. It's worked before!

...oh.

Oh god.

Carolina, you saw them all... oh.

Oh look, seems Felix doesn't like how Energy Swords work.

big shocker.

best bubbles-Today at 4:23 PM

Heh

Shocker

Energy sword

I get it

Anya-Today at 4:23 PM

um

That wasn't meant to be a pun.

And... if it was going to have any validity to it as a pun, it'd be more than just a random energy sword.

It'd be an energy sword/key that shoots lightning.

Why?

Because rule of fucking cool.

...oh shit.

oh, this is going to be a trainwreck.

...oh. oh wow.

i was... not expecting that.

that's like... digging up and breaking some probably very old emotional scars.

oof.

Woo, actual, once and for all confirmation that the Meta is fucking dead.

okay, I don't see either of the generals, so I'm just going to assume that the counseling sessions has become one for the Blood Gulch Crew alone.

oh, wait, no, they're still here.

ohhh boyyy

here we go.

again.

What?

oh no.

We're under attack!

OH FUCK

..what?

Go on.

We're evacuating Armonia. I can see the logic behind that, actually.

Ohhhhh

Ahahahahahaha!

...what?

Doyle... what are you doing?

Oh.

Oh god.

Anya-Today at 5:00 PM

THANK GOD FOR PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION INDEED!

Damntastic Despair-Today at 5:00 PM

Oh man, you're on the city attack

that's fun

Anya-Today at 5:01 PM

oh shit

ha!

oh... shit.

oh...

oh no

NO

OH GOD

OH GOD OH FUCK

ahahahaah

OH THANK FUCK

EVERYONE'S ALRIGHT!

...well, almost everyone

...We're back at Crash Site Bravo.

fuck...

no

no

FUCK

HE HAS THE SWORD

FUCKING HELL

fuckkkkkk

oh, that's... actually good to know, because if we got a bunch of people both off the planet and in the temple... while we got Felix, Locus, and the chairman outside...

Um... so what is our plan? I know you guys are keeping it vague, and that's cool and all but

I wanna know

oh god, this speech is screwed.

That... that was a good speech, alright. A damn good speech.

So, now it's time.

Let's go.

And I see we're starting by re-activating that alien technology.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

OH MY GOD!

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

IS THAT AN ALIEN TANK?!

WASH!

CAROLINA

SHIT

SHITSHITSHIIIIIIIT

phew

hahahahaha!

oh my god! That's awesome!

Oh great. Felix and Locus lived.

I'd like to call bullshit.

On to Episode 19!

Oh... hey! I just realized something!

Episodes 18 and 19 of Season 13 are references to Season 3!

Well, the names of the episodes, at least

Ohhhh shit.

WE GOT MORE COMPANY!

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuck

Yeah, we want to get on transmitting that fucking message, all right!

Anya-Today at 6:00 PM

...huh. who knew

...Huh?

...Whaaaat?

Hahahaha.

Oh. My. God.

Is he dead?

WHAT

Okay, yeah, Felix is dead and... oh shit.

Locus has the other sword now.

Ha. Thanks, asshole.

Yeah. I think I've seen enough mercenaries for the next... millennia.

And the message is being sent!

...Blood Gulch?!

Home?

Sister?! Holy shit!

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:10 PM

Sister, the girl we haven't seen for... 7 seasons now?

Anya-Today at 6:10 PM

Yeah.

I almost forgot she exists.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:11 PM

I never forgot

Anya-Today at 6:12 PM

We've done it. We won.

HOLY CRAP, A SHIP ALREADY?!

...oh. fuck. me.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:13 PM

Hargrove's not taking his loss lying down

Anya-Today at 6:15 PM

Clearly not.

This is going to... I don't know how it's going to go, actually.

...One final push, huh? Let's give it all we've got.

I agree with Grif. This is fucking bullshit.

WE HAVE AN AIRSHIP!

WOO

Thank you so much, FILSS.

SHIT

Thanks, O'Malley!

...Is that... Tex's helmet?

Oh god.

Wha?

AHAHAHAHA

GRIF HAS THE KNIFLE BACK!

...Huh?

Why are we bringing out Maine's old armor? Sure, it has all the enhancements, but what are we going to use those for?

Ohhhhhhhhhhh

Ahahahahaha!

WHAHAHAHA!

Oh... I love you all too.

...what?

Epsilon... Church? What are you about to do?

NO@

NO, EPSILON, YOU CAN'T

PLEASE

NO

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:28 PM

hugs Anya

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:28 PM

hugs

Anya-Today at 6:28 PM

p-please

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:28 PM

You've hit the most powerful and tragic scene in RvB

Anya-Today at 6:28 PM

whatever you're doing

stop

I'm begging you

best bubbles-Today at 6:29 PM

hugs ;;

Anya-Today at 6:29 PM

NO

OH GOD NO

EPSILON

NO

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:30 PM

"In the end, they just have to have faith. Ain't that a bitch?"

While I think Season 10 as a whole is better to Season 13, The End is my favourite RvB episode and the one that hits me in the gut every single time I rewatch it

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:32 PM

Church.. ;~;

Anya-Today at 6:33 PM

I mean... knowing there's a 15th season, I know they make it out alright... maybe. But... oh god. If I didn't know that... I'd be worried that they all die there.

Guys...

oh god.

Epsilon, you fucking stupid piece of shit, how dare you leave them.

WHY?!

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:33 PM

Faith

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:34 PM

internal screeching of pain

Anya-Today at 6:35 PM

oh god

Damntastic Despair-Today at 6:36 PM

Season 14 mostly cuts back on these big emotional moments

15 as well, though it's far less comedy focused than 14

Anya-Today at 6:36 PM

It's an anthology, right? Season 14, I mean.

best bubbles-Today at 6:36 PM

Mhmm

Anya-Today at 6:36 PM

I dunno what the fuck is happening with Season 15.

best bubbles-Today at 6:37 PM

Season 14 provides both its own mini stories, backstories, side stories and fun stuff

Like a rap battle and a death battle : P

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:37 PM

I started 15...

Anya-Today at 6:37 PM

backstories, did you say?

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:37 PM

I've got a bad feeling about 15

Anya-Today at 6:39 PM

...I still can't believe it.

Wow.

He... he can't be... Epsilon's gone.

He's gone

no

ugh

Wanderer of the Shade-Today at 6:46 PM

hugs

Anya-Today at 6:47 PM

hugs back

I feel this weird... emptiness, almost.

I'm expecting the tears to come but... they're failing me.

 2/16/18

Anya-Today at 10:49 AM

okay so

Time to begin the season that I'm honestly looking forward to the most! It should be a nice sort of breather episode after... after all that happened.

It occurs to me this is the longest season yet, at 24 episodes.

...Hmmmm, the intro clip... that was great!

We returned to HCE graphics and... well, I'm sorry, I just.

It was great.

This Anthology Season... it's going to be wonderful

Um... Dammit, Grif!

Anya-Today at 11:01 AM

LMAO

So... what I just watched was one of the various times Epsilon was going through a memory version of Blood Gulch! That... that makes sense! Somehow!

oh of course it ends on a shot of the storage unit because fuck me

...Whuh?

VIC?!

Okay, this is interesting all right.

Okay, sure!

WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!

CAROLINA?!

...NORTH?!

WYOMING?!

SOUTH?!

YORK?!

479ER?!

WASH!

OH SHIT, WE'RE BEING FOLLOWED... AND THE EPISODE'S ALMOST OVER... FUCK

This Season is going to be fucking awesome

Soooo

Vic's going to be our narrator now! That's cool!

So now we're going to see why they were all there, I take it?

I'm up for that!

OH GOD, SOMEONE WHO ISN'T A FREELANCER WHO CAN SHOOT!

SHIT

Sooo... the guy I've never heard of before is called Hammer. I don't think he has much of a chance to live through this.

I!

I'm pretty sure the reason your CO put you guys on this mission is because... he's pretty sure it's like a suicide mission.

That may be my cynical pessimist of a view. But I stand by it.

Annnnnd

Hammer's gonna die.

SON OF A BITCH!

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

ahahaha

They're gonna get transferred to Blood Gulch~

...huh?

WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE

FLOWERS?!

WHAT THE FUCK

...Hmmm.

oh my god

his name actually is Sarge!

I know, Flowers. But... oh. I think I see what you're doing here. You need to make sure that the least likely harm will come to Alpha. What better way to ensure that than placing him in the middle of a box canyon in the middle of nowhere with a bunch of idiots unlikely to actually get any fighting done?

I'm not even sure if I'm being sarcastic or not.

So now we're looking for people to join the Blue Team stationed at Blood Gulch... where the fuck is Tucker? He'll show up, I know he will.

There he is!

Yep.

So, for our candidates to join Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha, we have Candidate One, who is actually competent seeming, Candidate Two, who seems a little too airheaded and conceited, and Candidate Three... fuck it. Candidate Three it is!

...oh my god.

wtf

Welp.

That's one way.

I know, Lemons. I know. At least we're sending the crazies out to a place in the middle of no-where where they'll have no impact on anything.

Ever.

At all.

Totally won't be badasses.

Definitely won't kill a couple of Freelancers and stop a fucking civil war.

Nope!

Jesus fuck, Flowers!

WTF

So... we almost have everyone that was there in the first episode. We just need Church.

Look at this!: "Captain Flowers finds the last piece to his little operation and moves it to a a quiet little box canyon in the middle of nowhere. I think everything is going to work out just fine."

Even the description is aware that nothing horribly off-plan will happen at Blood Gulch! At all! Ever!

okay, I'm done being sarcastic now.

This is going to blow up gloriously.

Hmm?

...what?

Private Jimmy?

The guy who got beat up with his own skull?

...what?!

WHAT?!

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD

they... they fucking implanted Church into Private Jimmy's skull. They overwrit a guy's entire brain just so the Alpha AI could be hid!(edited)

JESUS FUCK

...what the fuck

insert the mcfucking aspirin dose, we need to start making the plan fail, dammit

Well, I know how it'll effect the relationship. The body will end up dead, and the AI will believe he's a ghost.

And it's begun.

pfffffffffffffffffffffft

..

...

...Church?

CHURCH!

I... I just need to say this: Never have I been so amused yet so saddened by seeing the pieces line up.

Anya-Today at 12:00 PM

OH HEY!

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

just wait a little while, Tucker.

You'll get a unique armor color soon enough.

omg

They're talking about the Vegas Quadrant!

aaaaaaaaa

d-did I accidentally start watching the bizarro universe episode?

because... nope!

Not right! This isn't right!

...?

OH COME ON

"Maybe up to 14 seasons, if we're lucky."

OH COME ON

suuuuuure

...wait. Flowers does die, but I seriously doubt that any Freelancers have ever been sent to Blood Gulch.

unless the Freelancer is codenamed Texas but eh

He tripped over a cord.

....what?!

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Him tripping caused the computer records to get scrambled... and, well, we all know the story from here.

And to hammer it in, we get Blood Gulch Blues playing at the end of the episode.

Aaaand just in case we were taking all this too seriously, there is no way I'm not going to bust out laughing at the mere description of episode 5

Yes, I have heard of the multiverse theory, and I honestly believe in it.

oh fuck, don't make me doubt my own reality like that! I don't want to be a figment of some kid's imagination!

oh my god

I can

I can't take this episode seriously

even for a second!

lmfao

...what?

what is that?!

jesus fuck

That... that is a messed up kid.

uhh

uhhhhhhh

jesus fUCK

OH GOD

...also, how does a kid get hydrochloric acid?!

OH GOD

Also... I just... Grif's reaction. "Meh, I'm sure he'll show up again in three years."

I mean.

In canon, that's about what happened, yeah.

omg

...you done yet, Simmons?

woo!

SHIT, CAT

...I... I don't think the cat cares.

oh shit

oh shit

ROOMBA!

Thank you, Jen Brown!

HOLY SHIT, GUYS!

what

Hi, Donut!

oh fuck

oh fuck

oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck

OH THANK FUCK

WAIT A MINUTE

THE KID'S NAME IS MALCOLM HARGROVE?!

awww

OH SHIT

SON OF A BITCH!

Okay but. Is alternate universe Malcolm's brother the Director? Why does he have lego versions of the BGC? Is Allison like, the cute girl next door for them or something?(edited)

These are legitimate questions.

Anya-Today at 1:01 PM

On to the next episode!

Yeah, you're right. There are still a bunch of Reds and Blues--all over the universe!

...And it's not surprising that it turns out they're all idiots.

...Wait a minute. We've been here before. I think...

omg

these guys are idiots! I think we're going to get along juust fine.

Unit FH57... got it.

...huh?

What's the alarm going off for?

OH COME ON

EVERYTHING JUST COMES BACK TO THE FUCKING CANYON, DOESN'T IT?!

lmfao

IT'S THE FIRST EPISODE!

sooooo... the chances of Unit FH57 living just dropped, sad to say.

I mean, it's kind of obvious now that they seem like they want to get involved with the plot.

And I don't remember them showing up... ever.

filled with the glorious number of two blue armored space marines.

Neither of whom have taken a level in badass yet.

If y'all weren't doomed by canon, I'd like your chances.

...and then they just stay there, watching the Blood Gulch Chronicles as it happens?

Please?

pretty please?

...what the?

what?

Oh great. They're in Blood Gulch. You three better not fuck this shit up, I STG

You. Will. Not.

The Blues in this canyon are protected by plot armor and the fact that they're around for Season 13.

13.

For that matter, so are the Reds in this canyon.

...hey, Unit FH57... you mind fucking off and doing... anything else?

Please?

...Drag, you might want to start running.

no.

Don't kidnap Sheila. Don't.

...what

...what

...CABOOSE?!

OH MY GOD

ahahahahahahaha

OH MY GOD

IT'S SET LIKE... JUST AFTER CHURCH GETS SHOT

OH MY GOD

...Yeah, the graphics for the FH57 group look so different compared to the Blood Gulch Crew right now.

OH THANK GOD

Awwwwww

That was sweet!

wait what

Oh fucking

SON OF A BITCH

WOO, A PSA!

Wait a fucking minute... live action?!

OH MY GOD

omg

It was a trailer for an in-universe movie! Maybe... who knows?

Something tells me that the next three episodes are gonna get... serious.

Anya-Today at 2:02 PM

oh

oh, it's Felix and Locus.

HOLY SHIT, THIS IS WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE UNDER THE HELMETS!

DO YOU KNOW HOW RARE IT IS TO GET THAT QUESTION ANSWERED?

OH MY GOD

OH MY GOD, LOCUS'S NAME IS SAM?!

HOLY SHIT

SON OF A BITCH

oh my god

oh my god

WOW

Huh?

Siris? Who the fuck are you and why do I feel like you're doomed?

Oh yeah, this is why I like Felix!

...huh?

oh fuck

yeah, okay, just personal opinion here but... can we kill this Ruben guy?

oh my god

Wow, Locus. Just... wow.

I am amazed at how skinny Felix is. I mean... wow. That is a lean motherfucker right there.

ha. of course the sun comes up.

that's cliche.

Oh my god, Felix and I agreed on something!

Anya-Today at 3:01 PM

Well, there's limos now for you guys! There's always a bright side!

oh fuck, I think I may actually like Felix a little bit now.

On to the next episode!

Hmmmm, I'm interested in seeing this propaganda.

omg

Project Freelancer sucks at propaganda.

fucking up lives? wonderful at that. Propaganda? bitch this is some of the worst I've seen.

Oh come on. We couldn't have done the Propo shit anywhere else?

Why are we involving Blood Gulch into this?

sigh

Oh hey... this takes place just before they're all transferred, then.

Oh, hey. That's nice, actually. It seems like they had got some type of getting along with each other after the chronicles finished up. That's... That's really nice to know.

yeah.

oh my god

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

...how the fuck did you get all of that footage?!

I have no idea what I just watched.

TIME FOR A DEATH BATTLE!

Oh my god. All three of those questions seem like something people at PF would ask. and probably did ask

Oh, hey! I've seen a few Death Battles before... does this mean that our normal announcers are being replaced by Grif and Simmons?

Because that's cool, I like that.

Heyo, Caboose!

wait what

Oh, heyyy, there's the death battle guys!

Ohhhhh, this is going to be cool!

THAT WAS AWESOME

Episode 14 and... Time for yet another set of idiot soldiers!

ohhhh

they're all colorblind to a degree, aren't they?

Yep.

well fuck, they all died.

and for no goddamn reason!

Okay, I'm a little over halfway into the season, I think it's about time I stop watching this and start working on my own AU some more.

 2/17/18

Anya-Today at 2:49 PM

so

I believe I have 10 more episodes to watch now in Season 14. Let's go!

No, wait, 9 to go, actually!

what

Uhhh. What?

best bubbles-Today at 2:50 PM

Which one you on now?

Anya-Today at 2:50 PM

15

episode 15

and... huh. okay then.

best bubbles-Today at 2:51 PM

Caboose's guide to making friends?(edited)

Anya-Today at 2:51 PM

yes

best bubbles-Today at 2:51 PM

Good ^^

Anya-Today at 2:54 PM

whuh

I... I was not expecting the sudden feels

i was not expecting the feels from the last 30 seconds.

wtf, rooster teeth?

that wasn't quite okay

time for episode 16!

"lord satan von killsalot"

OH MY GOD!

WE GET TO SEE WHAT O'MALLEY WAS GOING THROUGH WHEN HE WAS POSSESSING EACH OF THE BGC!

WOOHOO!

Anya-Today at 3:00 PM

It seems like they're reusing some footage for the parts where we aren't focusing on O'Malley. I like that.

"pop goes the omnicidal AI"

omg

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

good to see O'Malley likes being in Caboose's head just as much as I do. Because... why?

best bubbles-Today at 3:06 PM

"Hello. I am agent washingtub."

idk why, but that's always hilarious to me : P

Anya-Today at 3:06 PM

somewhere in the background, there's a weird mix of crying and laughter

i mean

it is kind of funny

oh dear god

lmfao

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

and now it's time for Church's head. This should be interesting, seeing as... well, you know.

best bubbles-Today at 3:10 PM

It's interesting going back and seeing the past events with the knowledge that Church is the Alpha AI

Anya-Today at 3:11 PM

yeah, it is. especially watching the first few seasons, knowing all the twists about Church that would come later. It... it's an experience, all right.

best bubbles-Today at 3:12 PM

And the knowledge that his original flesh container was Jimmy

Anya-Today at 3:12 PM

Mmmhmm.

And the episode finishes off with an "Oh fuck."

I have never seen a more accurate description of what it feels like watching the episode from an audience point of view the first time around. you know, the viewpoint where all we see is the guys being possessed in succession and what results from that?

The next one is called "Get Bent"... and I have a weird feeling about this one.

the casual-ness with which Vic spoils major plot points amazes me. I love it.

best bubbles-Today at 3:18 PM

I find it really funny that Church, Vic, and Lopez are all voiced by Burnie

Anya-Today at 3:18 PM

wait what

best bubbles-Today at 3:18 PM

Yep

Anya-Today at 3:18 PM

huh.

Who knew.

And... well, I'm mildly curious what Vic means by "can't remember everything right".

let's go

...oh no

oh no

LMFAO

Epsilon... how do you misremember the genders of the entire red team?!

oh dear god in heaven why

no

whyyy

epsilon... you done fucked up with this iteration.

this is... this is so fucking wrong

I just

wrong

I need bleach too.

OH MY GOD

I TAKE IT BACK, THIS MAY ACTUALLY BE KINDA COOL

oh god no

never mind.

this is, indeed, sick and wrong.

best bubbles-Today at 3:26 PM

it's wrick and song

Anya-Today at 3:28 PM

...what was that?!

oh come on

REALLY, EPSILON?! REALLY?!

...okay, so Church is officially a bisexual AI. Nothing anyone says will change my mind on that.

okay, let's try that again.

...huh?

best bubbles-Today at 3:29 PM

A-bi

Anya-Today at 3:29 PM

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

OH NO

EPSILON, SERIOUSLY?!

SERIOUSLY?!

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU REMEMBER YOURSELF AS A GIRL THIS TIME?!

OH MY GOD

well

that was a thing

a mildly traumatizing thing, but still a thing.

On to episode 18!

...tejano folk fusion, you say?

I don't suppose you mean something like the warthog theme song for this very show?

Okay, a musical episode... this should be interesting!

i can't watch this

i got

i don't think i even got 15 seconds into the actual video without laughing

no

I can't watch this

i

omg

oh thank god, someone actually talking!

...and there went my hope.

oh, wait, no, it's back!

...it's not the Warthog.

why?

is it even worth it? It's just a rocket launcher!

It can't even play bad mexican polka music!

whut

okay, my hopes are dying again

holy shit, i started singing along!

Tucker... you will never get the sniper rifle for more than a minute.

oh great, Church's singing a ballad now.

And, please, don't say die when referring to yourself. It gives me ptsd.

...please. stop bringing up the fact versions of you keep dying.

Because Command hates you all. and technically, Church is running this army. kinda.

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnope

I refuse.

i resent this.

i resent this with every fiber of my being.

the fuck am i watching?!

...wha?!

WHAT?!

that is not how any of the Blood Gulch Chronicles went, Donut.

No, Doyle, we were completely song and dance numberless. Thank god.

that was... that was mildly scarring yet also funny at the same time.

like the first five seasons, when i think about it...

time for episode 19!

it was a transitionary period, is what you're getting at, right?

Anya-Today at 4:00 PM

Yeah.

The episode description: "Everyone talks about the great adventures of the Reds and Blues, but have you ever stopped to think about what they did in their down time? It's really... really stupid."

I am even more excited now.

Oh my god. They started having movie nights?!

omg

oh god

only one movie? In the entire fucking canyon?!

JESUS FUCK, THAT'S TORTURE

ohhhh no.

welp. we lost our only real source of entertainment, folks, i hope we're happy with ourselves today.

i am laughing my ass off

Grif just gives no fucking shits. Church is at least trying!

oh my god.

that. was. terrible!

I could see a documentary on Blood Gulch working! Of course, you'd need to go into backstory on why the two sides of a war are getting along so well, and why Church talks about him having died and become a ghost, but I think I could see it!

in fact, i've fucking watched it! It's called Red Vs Blue!

wtf

i feel insulted!

very insulted!(edited)

NOW IT'S TIME FOR A RAP BATTLE!

WOOOOHOOO!

Hey, I think w--yeah, we've run the arc words into the ground.

Yeah, honestly I think that is the question plaguing all the RvB fans: Red Team or Blue Team?

I'm still Red Team for life

omg

"Why did we let Achievement Hunter write this stuff?"

HERE WE GO

WAIT, WHAT?!

FELIX, LOCUS?!

WHAT ARE YOU TWO DOING HERE?!

best bubbles-Today at 4:31 PM

Chiming in on the rhyme

Anya-Today at 4:31 PM

I have no mcfucking idea who won that one.

best bubbles-Today at 4:31 PM

"When you can count your IQ on a single hand"

That is a serious burn

Anya-Today at 4:32 PM

Also, a lot of the insults on all sides had some points to them.

Hence, why it's hard for me to choose.

...is it okay if I skip over a few episodes? Because I want to get to RvB vs Rooster Teeth.

imma take the silence as a yes!

or should I not?

Damntastic Despair-Today at 4:36 PM

There’s no order to 14, except with two story arcs

So skip around if you want

Anya-Today at 4:36 PM

wooo!

Aaand we're back to talking about multiverse theory, huh? Hmm, this is interesting.

A theory about a universe where all the shit the Blood Gulch Crew has been through is just a cartoon? I can see it.

no, really. I'm in that fucking universe. I can actually see it.

Saaaaarge... can you please not build a plot device?

Something's wrong with this teleporter... we might want to start running!

oh.

Hi Caboose!

wait what

oh, hey, suddenly live-action!

I think Geoff is drunk.

Very drunk.

burnie, i'm not even sure where you were taking that analogy any more.

3 dozen pivotal new characters for the next story arc?

oh fuck me.

The Machinima death switch...

oh boy.

and back to the BGC!

OH GOD

THIS IS GONNA SUCK

the death switch is hit, I take it... but hey, Tucker's going to be in this episode too! Cool!

well, apparently. Maybe not...

OH SHIT, THE XBOX!

wh-

what the fuck?!

ahahahahahaha!

AHAHAHAHAHA!

OH'

MY

GOD

...I BLAME BURNIE AND GEOFF!

And the rooster teeth employees have my response to this scenario: running and screaming.

Like any sane person.

this is ridiculous and I love it.

best bubbles-Today at 4:58 PM

You know what's really amazing that I didn't even realize at first?

Those aren't guys in suits

That's all CG

Anya-Today at 4:59 PM

...Yeah, that seems about right. No way the armor would so shiny otherwise.

Anya-Today at 5:06 PM

And Geoff's reaction to seeing the guy he voices in real life is also incredibly realistic.

no. Gus... just turn around.

well, that could've gone better.

awww. I have to stop for now.

pfffffffffffffffffffft

And behind Burnie is Simmons and Grif--I mean, Gus and Geoff, freaking the fuck out.

Burnie is taking Lopez showing up quite well, actually.

Oh, wait, no, there's Simmons and Grif.

ohhh... sorry, Burnie.

TUCKER!

YOU DID SHOW UP IN THIS EPISODE AFTER ALL!

Wait, Barb appears in this?

oh my god!

pfffffffffffffffffffffffft

That was beautiful!

Oh, hey there, Vic.

...I think I found my favorite speech in the show.

I love that episode.

...now I have to wonder if anyone's made a fanfic or something about Tucker working at RT?

I mean. Just saying.

 2/24/18

Anya-Today at 1:54 PM

Okay so. Time to get a start on Season 15.

I've been putting this off long enough, let's go.

Let's start with the trailer and already I'm disappointed in them.

...that was awesome.

...blood gulch?

Home?

What?

Time for episode one and fuck. my dog is barking because of fuck knows what

ugh.

...............

.......................what.

Anya-Today at 2:00 PM

WHAT?!

WHAT THE FUCK

wait... These guys aren't the Blood Gulch Crew.

I just... There'd be no reason for "Church" to take off his helmet, a robot probably can't detach their own head on purpose.

Even with all the levels in badass they've taken by now, they'd still be snarking.

And we're missing a couple of people.

The signs are all fucking there.

best bubbles-Today at 2:02 PM

This is not right

So therefor

It is left

Anya-Today at 2:02 PM

...

Excuse me, I

best bubbles-Today at 2:03 PM

I just woke up ^^;

Anya-Today at 2:03 PM

I'm trying to be rational here. Also, good morning.

...This Dylan person. I think like her.

Oh my god, these acronyms and her quicktalking skills. Lady, can you make me fall for you any faster?

...RTAA? Okay, that's a reference to Rooster Teeth Animated Adventures.

Oh shit. I hope she's good at not dying.

Clearly, she either is, or she has good friends.

No. I want my shit about the Blood Gulch Crew. The monster-fighting teens can suck it.

..oh my god.

We're going home.

Blood Gulch.

Episode 2 time.

Jax, huh? You hummed the episode intro theme for Blood Gulch and called it part of a soundtrack for the canyon? I already love you.(edited)

Oh god. He's an intern. Welp, he's gonna get traumatized at some point, sorry kiddo!

best bubbles-Today at 2:15 PM

Poor interns never come out unscathed

Anya-Today at 2:17 PM

Wha-heh? I know the angle that's coming, we're panning up to the top of one of the bases, I stg if

Oh thank god.

...you know... if you really want to know... I could forward you the web show, Dylan.

Like, I've been watching it.

SISTER?!

Kaikaina? That's your first name? Huh. Okay.

best bubbles-Today at 2:20 PM

Yep

Grif's family is hawaiian

Anya-Today at 2:20 PM

Huh. Who knew.

best bubbles-Today at 2:21 PM

What's funny though

Kaikaina means "younger sibling of the same gender"

Anya-Today at 2:22 PM

...huh. who knew.

best bubbles-Today at 2:22 PM

Learning a lot this season : P

Anya-Today at 2:23 PM

I agree with Sister here. I think. There's something up here.

Heyo there, Vic!

omg. Vic's been editing the footage he has into a version of the Chronicles.

Enjoy watching the Blood Gulch Chronicles, you two.

wait what

why the fuck is there ominous music

...who the fuck are you.

...it doesn't end on the usual subscribe to the channel plea.

instead we get the blood gulch blues.

Episode 3 and... where are we now?

Well, the AI fragments part is entirely legitimate, I can tell you that much. We learned about those after the haze dream that was the Chronicles.

oh my god

the mother of invention

real names? for all the freelancers?

what the fuck is Wash's last name, tell me, lady, I need to know!

best bubbles-Today at 2:34 PM

What if that is his name?

David Washington?

Anya-Today at 2:35 PM

Then I'd be amazed at the laziness that Project Freelancer had.

best bubbles-Today at 2:36 PM

They were too cheap to get a bunch of real AIs and they thought torturing one to get more was the next logical option

Anya-Today at 2:36 PM

...true.

best bubbles-Today at 2:36 PM

And they acquiesced to Carolina's demand for two AIs(edited)

Anya-Today at 2:37 PM

...yeah.

best bubbles-Today at 2:37 PM

And they didn't even tell the Freelancers what their mission really was

This group is not exactly known for its smart decisions

Anya-Today at 2:37 PM

I know.

best bubbles-Today at 2:38 PM

Oh, and let us not forget blowing up Florida to keep one of their agents under cover : P

Anya-Today at 2:38 PM

Never forget Florida. I just... I feel like that giving an agent a code name that is their fucking last name crosses a line of stupidity that's just... stupidity.

best bubbles-Today at 2:39 PM

But that's why it's perfect. It's so stupid that no one would expect it

Anya-Today at 2:40 PM

sigh

heh?

Ummmmmmmmm... Jax, I think this is the time for you to... leave now. Go back, turn around.

Jax. go.

The answer is simple, Jax. YOU RUN!

GOD, HOW CAN THAT NOT GET THROUGH TO YOU?!

oh thank fuck.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, JAX, JUST SAY THEY'RE HERE

Anya-Today at 3:00 PM

wait... hold up.

Gulch... prototype?

hold the fuck up here.

And time for an action scene, fitting enough.

Here's an idea. YOU RUN.

SCREW THE CAMERAS, LIVING IS IMPORTANT, MORE IMPORTANT, I MIGHT ADD

oh my god.

Jax, no.

...huh?

Thundersnow? That... that sounds like a weird weather condition, alright.

Dylan. No.

This is a stupid plan.

Do not.

And thank you for confirming my thoughts, Dylan. That is not the Blood Gulch Crew.

Huh?

best bubbles-Today at 3:06 PM

Thundersnow is really cool

Anya-Today at 3:06 PM

Oh fucknuggets, the guy we saw in the ominous closing of the previous episode.

Oh great. The edge of a cliff.

If you two die, I will not forgive you.

...huh. Thanks, weird guy. And yes, I'm curious how Dylan knows that those... people, aren't the BGC.

...screw it, mystery guy, I'm calling you unicorn head until we find out your name.

...huh? WHY THE FUCK IS ANYONE BLOCKADING CHORUS?! FUCKING HELL, UNSC

Also... there has to be some significance with the use of Blood Gulch Blues in the outros. I just... it's this gut feeling I have.

Oh my god! Smith! Bitters!

But also... oh fuck. Please, Jax, don't have died this early on. If you did die, please turn out to be an AI so we can make ghost jokes again.

Palomo! Jensen!

Thank god, Jax will be fine.

What.

Dylan. What the fuck.

Also, Kimball's the president of Chorus now, good for her!

...Messenger?

It's time to find them. Time to find the Blood Gulch Crew.

...when the fuck did this become the last few scenes of The Force Awakens?

FUCK

CABOOSE! YOU OKAY, MAN?

Oh my god! Guys!

And to no-one's surprise, Caboose is perfectly fine.

It occurs to me I haven't seen these guys so lighthearted in a while.

WASH! CAROLINA! ...Of course you're the only two who are slightly serious right now.

..the temple? Oh wait... you didn't do something with the procreation one, did you?

Please, please tell me you didn't, or so help me, guys

Oh come on.

pffffffffffft

lmfao

Damntastic Despair-Today at 3:36 PM

Of course the procreation temple was activated, Tucker was there

Anya-Today at 3:36 PM

Fair enough.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 3:37 PM

You gotta wonder though, who slept with who? Besides Grif and Simmons, of course

Anya-Today at 3:38 PM

pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

These idiots. I love them with all my heart and soul.

Damntastic Despair-Today at 3:40 PM

How could you not?

Also did you watch the remaining season 14 episodes? Specifically the freelancer ones?

Anya-Today at 3:41 PM

...shit.

I knew there was something I forgot to do.

I'll finish this episode, then go back and watch those, okay?

best bubbles-Today at 3:41 PM

Spencer Porkensenson

Best character

Damntastic Despair-Today at 3:42 PM

Shh, she’s not there yet

Anya-Today at 3:42 PM

...oh dear. Now we're getting to the... direct aftermath of what happened after... after the finale of Season 13.

Oh.

He... he's really gone, then.

DAMMIT, EPSILON!

best bubbles-Today at 3:43 PM

I can't believe he sacrificed his life to save everyone

That fucking asshole

Anya-Today at 3:43 PM

...

hey, come on, it's okay for me to have fucking feelings, okay?

I get why he did it, I just...

I wish that there was another way to win that battle.

...

what?

what?

Church? CHURCH?!

best bubbles-Today at 3:45 PM

Church is in session

Anya-Today at 3:46 PM

holy shit

I... I'm not sure whether or not I can believe it. The message... the message said that the Church asking for help was the Alpha.

I...

holy shit

I... holy shit. I need to rewatch that scene, just to be sure.

I just

holyshit

okay, so after... that, I'm going to take a quick little... break, to scream.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

 3/8/18

Poppet-Today at 12:29 PM

Okay, I've been putting this off.

I'm going to watch the last three episodes I need to of S14, then try and get back to progressing S15.

Time for Episode 21.

Poppet-Today at 12:31 PM

Project Freelancer had a goal once???

Who knew.

Oh?

Who are you?

Ohio?

Huh?!

Oh, um, hello there... Iowa!

And Idaho...

Got it Memorized?-Today at 12:32 PM

silent squees

Poppet-Today at 12:32 PM

Oh shit, I like you all already.

...Really? Being genuinely good, sweet people keeps you from getting mission assignments?(edited)

...that makes sense.

Sadly.

New rankings?

Hmmm, what are they?

Oh my god, that is amazing!

AND WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE, I RECOGNIZE THAT FUCKING AREA

THAT'S THE OFFSITE STORAGE FACILITY

THE ONE WHERE TEX KICKED EVERYONE'S ASS(edited)

HOW DOES SNEEZING BLOW UP FIVE TO 6 VEHICLES?!

wait what

wait what

WASH?!

CT?!

...wait a fucking

minute

...Hi, Georgia?

HOLY SHIT, HI GEORGIA

WHO KNEW YOU WERE MORE THAN JUST A ONE-OFF JOKE?

...Well, shit, I already hate Georgia.

That took... two lines.

That is a fucking record.

...Ohio just called Wash "David".

...holy shit.

hholy shut

HOLY MCFUCK, A WILD SOUTH DAKOTA

I DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE YOU HERE!

pfffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff

CT...

You were so nice.

wait what

WHAT THE FUCK

...

YOU.

AIDEN PRICE.

WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT?!

...I don't trust this.

What sort of mission is this, Price?

hmmmmmmmm

i really don't trust this.

OH HEY, HI THERE 479R!

Episode 22 time

WAIT WHAT

OH SHIT, THIS ICE PLANET ISN'T ABANDONED AND...

OH COME THE FUCK ON

YOU THINK I WOULDN'T NOTICE THIS?

hhhhhhhhhhholy shit

We got rejects from Charon Industry here as well as rejects from Project Freelancer.

holy shit

Poppet-Today at 1:00 PM

Dammit Iowa

Oh my god.

D... depending on when on the timeline this takes place...

this is the first fucking case of it.

The first fucking case of useless people being sent somewhere entirely out of the way

Where their only reason for being there is because someone else is there.

Oh my god.

Oh my god.

Wait a minute

Hey, Wash.

Oh.

Oh my god.

They didn't drop out.

Also... heh.

pfffffff

That was worth it.

And, time for Episode 23... I think I've seen this one, actually.

All it is is showing what it would take to flip a warthog in real life, plus some live-action skits at the beginning and end.

Eh, I'll watch the skits anyways.

And I'm here so... might as well watch the rest of it.

You know, sometimes I wonder how the people who voice the characters on RvB sound like their characters.

Then I hear Burnie say something and I realize it.

...holy shit.

I've finished Season 14.

Wow!

The rest of Season 15 cannot be found, since I am currently watching it semi-blind (semi because of tumblr and ao3) with my parents.

And this is the compiled version of all my pre-S16 reactions to the RvB hell-ride.  Thanks for reading, hope it was entertaining.

[obdurare-archive-blog]

headcanon meme: ☘️ 🌿 🍃 (green theme unintended c: )

headcanon meme : accepting : @temeraaires

☘️: A headcanon that I’m surprised more people don’t shareMore historical based headcanons, honestly.  Things like…I don’t know.  I figure alone Hector will brace a plate with his forearms, whether he’s on land or at sea, because he’s so used to having to hold it in place so it doesn’t slide off the table with the swells.  And because of this Elizabeth got the good china that was probably going to be sold off rather than kept because it’s useless for them and square plates are a lot more suited to ship life.  Or that Hector has an absolutely foul mouth like most other sailors of his time and background would have.  He might play up the gentleman act but you better believe he spits the word fuck like bullets when he’s giving orders.  Or that he spent the majority of his life barefoot before he became a captain.  Easier to grip a damp deck with bare feet than it is booted ones.  Things like that.  Emphasis on actual history isn’t as big in the PotC fandom, though, as other AoS fandoms, which is fair.  The historical timeline for it is a little screwy compared to real world history.

🌿: An unpopular headcanon that I haveI’m convinced y’all are trying to get me in trouble with everyone else, lmao.  He’s not as focused on his looks as I’ve seen done.  He doesn’t think about it, it’s not important.  He’s going to charm you up one side and down the other and you’re going to forget all about what he looks like, or he’s going to be more attractive based on it.  But he himself?  Honestly doesn’t care.  Doesn’t factor in.  In the same vein, he does not think of himself as Barbossa.  He thinks of himself as Hector.  He uses it in an official capacity, but he’s never batted an eyelash at being called by his first name, either (by someone of equal stature) and I honestly don’t think he’d freak out on someone else calling him by it.  It is his name, after all.

🍃: A headcanon that I created now on the spotHe dogears book pages.  As precious as his books are to him, keeping up with a bookmark just isn’t practical, and while, if there’s anything around he can use to shove inside to hold his place he will, if there isn’t or if it’s a situation he has to put it down and move fast, he feels no guilt folding the corner of a page down instead.  Never let him borrow your books, because that’s how they’ll come back to you.

[magenta-storm]

Dickon, you absolute twit, why’d you have to get yourself killed like that, you poor big dumb puppy? (ngl though, the part of me that’s still mad at Billy after season 4 enjoyed it a little)

Fuck you Randyl, served you right. It was a bit sad when he touched Dickon’s arm, but fuck you, you’re still a terrible dad. And stupid. Seriously you decided to die for Cersei, why? It wasn’t out of loyalty, as Tyrion pointed out. So... just to be racist... apparently? What fucking morons. Sam obviously got his brains from his mother.

I love how the Citadel got the news so quickly when last season they didn’t even know that Jeor Mormont had died.

Dany, I hope that decision doesn’t come back to bite you in the ass. Maybe now Jorah’s back she’ll stop doing dumb things. Please god let her stop doing dumb things.

GENDRY. GENDRY GENDRY GENDRY!!!! thought you might still be rowing, oh my god, I died. Ridiculous fanservice, yes, but it was still hilarious.

I’m not sure if I entirely accept that it makes sense that’s he’s been in King’s Landing all this time, but meh.

Gendry, don’t you fucking DARE get yourself killed beyond the Wall before you see Arya again.

lol, I’m not sure weaponry skills are hereditary, but ok. Also not sure why he cares about his douchey dad...

Not sure I accept that Bronn dragged Jaime’s armour-clad ass all the way to the other side of the lake, but ok. Even if it was a river and they were washed downstream, it’s still a little hard to believe. But whatever, better than them being dead.

Excuse you Jaime, maybe show a bit of gratitude for Bronn saving your dumb ass?

Ugh. Just as it looks like maybe Jaime’s starting to grow a brain about Cersei, she’s pregnant? *groans for ten years* 

Also, if Cersei fucking does anything to Bronn, I will be so fucking mad. Also, how did Tyrion even get him a message? Varys’ little birds are compromised by Qyburn... but maybe he doesn’t know that? I’d have thought he’d have figured it out by now though.

I’m mad Bronn and Tyrion didn’t have a proper reunion scene.

How the actual fucking fuckballs has Bran been ‘north of the wall for years’ and then like two scenes later baby Sam is still a fucking baby?!?! Like, I can forgive Jon zipping to and from Dragonstone at the speed of light, we can’t have him spend the whole season traveling, but why the fuck would they even bother to include baby Sam when all it does is call attention to the screwy timeline?

The only possible reason I can imagine they bothered to recast Dickon just to kill him so quickly is if Sam’s going to inherit Horn Hill? Not that he should be able to with his vows and everything, but maybe if the White Walkers breach or destroy the Wall there won’t be enough Night’s Watch left to care if he leaves?

Not sure what to make of Rhaegar and Elia’s annulment. How do you annul two kids? I would have thought it would either be divorce or polygamy. I guess it was just so they could get the point across without saying Lyanna’s name, which Sam probably would have recognized, or at least took some notice of the name Stark. But still, just seems kinda stupid when they could have just gone with the polygamy thing. Seriously, how the fuck do you annul two kids? And without the permission of the King?

Jon patting Drogon was sweet and cool and also a bit weird. Why did he do that? Unless he was meant to be feeling some kind of compulsion to do it because of Targ blood, but I don’t think that really came across in his expression. It seemed more like just ‘lol why not pat a dragon?’ The way Drogon sniffed him was slightly hilarious. Like “...are you...” *dramatic sniff, dramatic blink* “yes you are!”

If that note was what I think it was, Arya and Sansa had better not have too big a fight over this. Having a confrontation and then sorting out their issues - great. Playing right into Littlefinger’s hands by having a huge rift come between them - terrible. They had better not do that TV thing where characters inexplicably refuse to explain their actions clearly and let the other party believe the worst possible version of events to draw conflict out longer. I fucking hate that so much.

Sidenote, I’m so fucking sick of Sansa’s ugly ass black dresses. Dress? With a weird little leather corset thing? Why?

If Jon and Arya don’t reunite this season I’m suing. Why couldn’t Jon look more happy about Arya being alive? Grr. They had better not fuck up that reunion and they’d better mention Needle.

I’m not sure what to make of the look on Dany’s face when she saw Jorah, and hugged him. It seemed really romantic, not sure it was supposed to be? I kinda ship Jorah x Dany, and think if any Dany pairing is going to happen in the show, it would make the most sense, but I also think it’d be weird to deviate that far from the books now.

If Jon and Dany are going to get together/get married, they haven’t done the best job setting it up. Didn’t Emilia and Kit used to date? lol, why the fuck can’t they manage to conjure up some better chemistry? Next to the Dany x Jorah reunion, it looked really noticeable that they don’t give a fuck about each other. lmao, Jon and Gendry had better chemistry in one scene! On the other hand though, if they were all over each other with sappy love at first sight bullshit it would ruin both their characters. It needs to be a bit more in the middle if that’s where they’re going with them.

[araminthe-ispwitch]

hi so i love your writing its amazing i especially love gay highschool romance its my favourite i was wondering if i could have some advice im trying to write a school fic and im not sure how to transition between different characters since theres quite a lot. its in third person if that helps. if you have any other tips for school fics id be happy to hear them :)

WOWOKAY HOLY SHIT IT’S BEEN A WHILE SINCE SOMEONE PRAISED MY KNB FIC

(Alsoshit I have to update OTL)

((butalso wOW??? SOMEONE’S ASKING FOR WRITING ADVICE FROM ME???))

(((Okay,I rambled way too much here with advice when you were just asking aboutcharacter transitions… so uh I’ll just put this under Keep Reading. Anon, yourspecific question is answered on #6. If anyone’s interested in writing tips, feel free to skip some ramblings.)))

Well,okay, actually, The ExaggeratedlyPerilous Journey of a Gay High School Romance or GHSR had been my veryfirst school fic (I can’t count that one DNAngel fic ‘cause the setting washalf-outside of school…) and the one thing I noticed while writing it was that ahuge cast of characters needs to be handled with care, otherwise things cangrow way out of proportion.

Letme give a little more exposition on what happened to me exactly first, so you’llunderstand how important writing this fic had been for me:

GHSRwas my second fic in my entire life. After my DNAngel fic (which I really don’t encourage you guys to readunless you want a cringe-y flashback to your teenage weaboo days), I took along break from writing until KnB came along and inspired me. Now, whathappened in that break was that I got slowly influenced by other writers’styles as I read and read, so once I started creating GHSR, it was oodles morerefined than my first fic.

Butit still had that weaboo factor in it somewhere. I hadn’t practiced in a while,so I haven’t gotten rid of that thing yet.

(Andhere I will admit that my first writing style was really heavily inspired by acertain DNAngel fic author. She had written crackfics and I unfortunately adoptedher habit of using “blunette, blue orbs, teardropped, etc.” Yeah. Are youcringing yet? ‘Cause I am. Still, thanks for inspiring me, lady.)

Now,when I wrote Ch. 1 and 2 of GHSR, I was still using my old style. But as Iwrote chapters 3, 4, and 5—and as my word count climbed higher and higher forevery chapter jesus christ—I finally started to find my own style and startedcorrecting all the cringe-y habits I had before (hence why I had refined Chapter1 a while back). So what I’m saying here,anon, is that that experimental school fic of mine practically made me realize howto properly write a school fic.

(I’msorry this will be a bit longer pls bear with me let’s focus on the advice partnow)

Okay,first of all, if your school fic will be having a huge cast (because you canactually writing a fic set in a school without writing a lot of characters init), it’s best to really know each character’s persona. This is easy since if youread a lot of fanfics about the fandom you’re going to write for, you will havea lot of references on how the character is written by the majority. Forexample, I learned how to write Takao by reading works about him, and then Ijust added my own interpretation of him a bit and viola, I now have a Takao whofits my “everyone goes to one school” AU. It’s amazing because a lot of myreaders tell me Takao is so in-character in my fic, but when you really thinkabout it, his entire character isn’t completely shown in the canon as opposedto Kuroko or Kagami, right? But I managed to write him well enough that heseems natural to the readers because they’ve read other works about him, too—andall because I did my research on how his character works!

Anotherexample for this is when I fucked up Kagami’s character. OTL

Backin GHSR’s Ch. 1, I freely wrote Kagami as this food-loving delinquent who ispretty much down to fight. I was sofucking wrong. Watching the next seasons of KnB, I realized with horrorthat I fudged him up so bad and was really so embarrassed and basically, Iwanted to delete my fic right then and there. He’s a food lover, yeah, but he’snot actually actively looking fortrouble. He’s actually a well-mannered kid who is just skirting close todelinquency due to his looks, but is actually just a huge basketball dork.Those times he gets in trouble with authorities? Not actually his fault becausehe’s a mischievous kid—he’s just really unlucky lmao.

(Andthat is why I rewrote Ch. 1. I didn’t do enough research on him and I felt bad.OTL)

Okay,so basically this first advice is me telling you to read other fanfics and do your research. Major characters arepretty easy since they’re popular. It’s the side/minor ones you have to payattention to if you’re going to make them protagonists like what I did withGHSR, since they’re not fully fleshed out and it’s up to the fans to give themtheir own interpretation (like what I did with Sakurai Ryou). A word ofcaution, though: you have to be carefulin distinguishing canon from fanon during your writing. Fanon tends tooverwhelm the canon when the fandom accepts it more—when in reality, the fanonis inaccurate. I can’t think of an example in KnB, but in Yuri on Ice, OtabekAltin had become an Ensemble Dark Horse character in the anime because of hisconnection to Yuri Plisetsky, one of the major characters. Despite his littlescreen time, he’s now one of the most popular guys in the fandom and because ofhis character profile’s small size, the fans have pretty much supplied itthemselves—which kind of ruined his persona a bit. I’ve seen some fanworkswhere he seemed out of character, and that’s a bit dangerous when you’rewriting. So tread carefully when researching characters through fanworks.

Secondadvice: research school fics by reading school fics. Yep, this oneis pretty simple. Just find a school fic, and if you can’t put it down, keepreading and enjoy. You can come back for serious studying on it. (You can do soon my fic lol.) Even better: find a school fic on the fandom you’re going towrite for! If its style is within your standards, then go ahead and use it as astudy material. You might think I’m telling you to copy it, but oh no, I’m actuallytelling you to let it influence yourknowledge of how school fics work. For example, when I was inspired towrite for DNAngel, I never bothered about the mechanics of how schools incertain countries work—because I thoughtthat all schools in the world worked the same. (I hate teenage me.) It wasonly through spending enough time with anime and fanfics that bothered todescribe the Japanese schools’ inside slipper system that I realized that “oh fuck I’ve been basing Japanese schoolson my country’s schools oH SHIT”. Now, I can get away with that in DNAngel,where the rules and the world are a bit screwy. But I cannot bullshit my way through KnB, an anime that is fucking based in Japan. I, as a writer, amexpected to be responsible enough to research the setting of KnB, which is Japan’s education system. So not only amI telling you to research by reading school fics, I am also telling you toresearch the setting of the story. Chances are, there will be some differencesfrom what you know and what is actually real. And not only the setting, too, butthe culture of the school—not all schools mandate their students to clean theirrooms by themselves, and not all schools freely allow their students to go therestroom (looking at you, America). These are simple things you can look up onGoogle, and if you’re lucky, you’ll come across stuff like this in Tumblr, too.

Thirdadvice: it’s okay to be vague sometimes.There’s no need for you to be specific on a lot of details or even reverentlywrite what happened to a character the whole day. You can skip the time to amore interesting event or just be general about something. Because if you getway too focused on giving out every detail, not only will it bore your readers,it will also bore you and tire you out. Take GHSR, for example. In Ch. 5, thetimeline was from Tuesday to Friday, but despite my overly-long chapter, I didn’tactually write every single day on the story from morning to night. I showedwhat was happening in school in general and skipped to the really important andeventful moments for my characters to give movement to the story. Because I can’tjust put so much interaction if it doesn’t mean anything—that would be pointlessand exhausting. This really helpswhen your school fic has a huge cast, like mine. (In fact, the only reason thefirst few chapters were reverently following each day was because the startingcast was small, but it’ll soon grow and I’ll have to put plenty of time-skips.)

Eventhough what you’re writing is a school fic, you still have a designatedprotagonist, so most of the story revolves around them, hence the need to notdetail every single aspect of their life. It’s only called a school fic becausethat’s their setting.

Fourthadvice: your protagonist doesn’t have totalk to everybody in the room. Imagine Kagami in his classroom in my fic,with Aomine beside him, and Kuroko and Sakurai at the back. And then all theother classmates have been replaced with the cast of KnB—so technically, everyoneknows each other inside that room. Now, just because Kagami knows everyonedoesn’t mean he’s entitled to chat all of them up—nor are you entitled to forcehim to. Some writers (most especially those starting out, as I saw this yearsago, but hopefully, this generation has learned) think they have to forceinteractions for everybody so it won’t be boring, but actually, that would besuch a tedious process. You have to think about this realistically, even thoughit’s fiction. Even the most social butterfly in KnB would get tired if theyhold conversations with everyone in the span of a certain period of time. Thepurpose of a school fic is to emulate a school setting, and you don’t reallysee everyone interacting with each other, right? That would be chaos. Let therebe peace—in intervals. For example, when Misdirection was having their firstpractice in GHSR back in Ch. 4, everyone knew each other in the clubroom, but Ididn’t write them all talking to each other. Aomine and Midorima were isolatedfrom the rest and hadn’t talked to the others unless necessary. So unless your character wants to interact with someone specifically, it’sokay to just let them be silent.

Fifthadvice: DON’T PHYSICALLY DESCRIBE YOURCHARACTERS WHEN YOU’RE WRITING IN THEIR PERSPECTIVE.JUST DON’T. There’s this post I’ve found in Tumblr  (which I urge you to read) after finishing Chapter5, where it’s a bit demeaning to refer to the character you’re using with blandtitles/epithets like “the blonde” or “the male”, as if that was the only thing going for them. I admitted that it is, but at the same time, I gottause this style sometimes becausethere will always be scenes where several characters are all altogether. InGHSR, I can’t help but refer to Hyuga as the “bespectacled one” because thereare other black-haired upperclassmen besides him. Even with Kagami and Akashi—Ihave to distinguish the two. It helps that you describe their other features,but giving them titles like the ones above can be a bit too much if there’s noone else in the area that has the same description, ya know? So I propose this:

Don’tdo this:

The black-haired and blue-eyed kickboxer stared at the mop of blondehair he could see outside the gates and sighed.

Do this:

The kickboxer stared at the mop of blonde hair he could see outsidethe gates and sighed.      

“ButAra!” you say, with shocked eyes, “isn’t the first one your style? That line wasin the beginning of Chapter 5!”

Yes,it is. But you know what else? I wrote that line over two fucking years ago. I posted the chapter over a year ago and I didn’t edit that lineout. But over the course of a year, my style concerning this naming thing haschanged, and now I am actively trying to lessen that kind of thing in my works.I didn’t have to remind my readers that Kasamatsu Yukio had black hair and blueeyes. That was just my ego talking,being fancy as I add the descriptions to his title. That whole thing wasone of the very habits I’ve retained from my DNAngel days—and I fucking hate it actually so please don’t emulate me and just keepyour character’s self-perspective simple. Please.

Okay,sixth advice (and the last one for now because this has become too long): transitioning between characters inthird-person perspective is easy as long as you keep things SIMPLE. Sobasically, you just have to apply the simplicity above when leaping from onecharacter to another! It’s actually pretty easy when it involves dialogue:

Sakurai chuckled nervously at the answer. “I-I’m sure they canimprove, Sensei.”

“Oh, I’m hoping for it. Otherwise, we’ll all be in trouble,” said Kogawith an aggravated sigh.

“Maybe if you didn’t suspend us, we wouldn’t be struggling right now,”muttered Aomine, glancing sideways at the door.

See?For every line of dialogue, there was a corresponding character assigned to it.Dialogue tags and extra exposition helps.

Onthe other hand, for internal narration:

As much as Kise wanted to see Kasamatsu as soon as possible, hedecided to hold back since it was obvious his best friend needed a companion—anotion that Midorima rejected almost immediately, of course. Shintarou didn’tneed anyone tagging along with him as he switched from one department toanother. And he most definitely didn’t need Kise Ryouta pestering him withquestions about Takao.

Seehow in the first half, the narration was in Kise’s third-person POV, and thenon the other half, it’s Midorima’s? As long as you’re referring to who is thinkingat the moment and showing the readers whose mind it is you’re narrating,everything will be fine.

Thisalso works with dialogue-to-narration:

“You four are already in an agreement, correct?” he askedmatter-of-factly. The four high-schoolers paused at his words, staring at himin surprise and bubbling dread. There was something about the way the lightglinted off the math teacher’s glasses that warned them to be cautious, and sothey reluctantly nodded.

Thefirst sentence was in Koga-sensei’s POV, then the rest was showing what Kagami,Aomine, Kuroko, and Sakurai were experiencing.

Justkeep things simple. The best tip I can offer here is “if you’re gettingconfused by the transitions yourself,then chances are, your readers will be, too.”

Soagain:

1)Study your characters’ personas.

2)Research by finding similar works.

3)Being vague in storytelling is alright sometimes.

4)Social interaction with each character in a large group isn’t a must.

5)Don’t dump descriptions on your character all the time. (Unless you’re writingcomedy, but that’s for another lesson.)

6)Keep things simple so character transitions aren’t confusing or jarring.

That’sall I can think of for now. If you still have specific questions, don’t beafraid to message me! Honestly, though? Just keep on experimenting andpracticing with your writing. Read fanfics and do your research. That phasebetween DNAngel and KnB was my dominant experimental phase and actually, I’mstill improving and refining my own style, which you’ll notice if you check outmy new fics. Go and find your own style, too! :)

[rinoaheartillyy]

Time Compression goes all screwy (well, screwier) and drops a character from VIII into the XV world of Eos and after they go back to the VIII world, the opposite happens for a brief moment before time fully corrects itself. What is the first things out of the displaced characters' mouths?

Firstly I just wanna apologise for the extremely late reply to this! It’s a really great question that made me think a lot, so thank you ^^ I hope I’ve read it in the correct way, I’m so sorry if I’ve misunderstood it! I couldn’t think of what character from each ff I’d like to write about so instead I’m gonna give you most of the main characters from each game. I’ve thought about different stories and interactions that these characters would have and because I also couldn’t decide on what location to use in both worlds, I’ve switched up time compression a lil’ bit so that when each character travels to their opposing world, they end up in a location in that world that relates to their personality. I hope that makes sense lmao. Okay, so here goes. VIII → XVSquall: naturally ends up in one of the most gloomiest places on Eos, the Vesperpool. It’s dark and damp and after looking around for a minute, he realises what’s happened he’s used to it by now. Squall’s first words is (you guessed it) “…Whatever.” Most likely, he’s shrugging off the feeling of being alone. He sees blue sky in the distance and starts heading in that direction because he knows that’s where he’ll find Rinoa.Rinoa: finds herself in beautiful Galdin Quay on the sand watching the waves. She’d be scared if it wasn’t for the tranquil scenery, it feels just like home. Her gaze wanders and lands on the back of a guy dressed in all black who appears to be fishing. “Squall..?” It’s more of an inaudible question to herself rather than getting ‘Squall’s’ attention.Selphie: Wiz’s chocobo post (where else?) Doesn’t hesitate for a second. Squeals at the sight of so many cute animals and immediately starts customising her very own chocobo. “You’re even cuter than the ones back home! AND YOU COME IN PINK!!!”Zell: is the first one to interact with someone from this world. He’s at a campfire and across from him, Gladio is sat eating some cup noodles. “WHERE ARE THE HOTDOGS?!” Of course hotdogs are the first thing on Zell’s mind no matter where he is in time or space. Gladio invites Zell to sit down and the pair have a pleasant conversation, discussing the worlds they’re from, the different books they like and who their friends are. Zell even compliments Gladio on his tattoos but the chat suddenly turns sour when Zell has a taste of cup noodles and spits them out yelling “UGH, GROSS!” Quistis: feels tiny as she stands before the Rock of Ravatogh. The first words to escape her mouth are “well this puts the Fire Cavern to shame” as she starts heading up the mountain. Nothing like a bit of adventure in a foreign world during time compression when you’re waiting to be sent back home, right?Irvine: ends up in the Weaverwilds (to him it’s the middle of no where). A blonde-haired guy is fighting some sabertusks and Irvine helps out by shooting them down from afar. Prompto runs over and thanks him. Irvine tips his hat, “Nice guns you got there. Hey, uh, any hot women around these parts?” Prompto looks confused but nevertheless shows Irvine photos of Cindy and Aranea before the two start an in-depth conversation about guns and women. Irvine also lets Prompto wear his cowboy hat for a while and Prompto takes many selfies.Laguna: wakes up in a bed at the Leville Hotel in Lestallum. “Raine?! Ellone?!” Confusion overtakes him for a while as the hotel room looks so familiar, almost like Raine’s bedroom. When he walks out of the hotel, he realises he’s trapped in time compression and sighs, holding on to the thought of Raine still being alive. He takes a deep breath and takes pleasure in how similar Lestallum looks to Winhill with its narrow paths and flower shops. With a feeling of nostalgia, Laguna walks to the market to buy some things that he can take back with him to give to Ellone. Seifer: fishing at the Forgotten Pool. It’s peaceful until “TURN THE ROD TOWARDS THE FISH!”Seifer turns around to see Ignis staring at him, arms crossed. He holds his head in his hands and mutters to himself, “I can’t believe I managed to find someone more annoying than chicken-wuss. I actually miss that little shit.” He tries to return to his fishing, it lasts a couple of minutes before Seifer gets so annoyed, he threatens Ignis with his gunblade. A fight is about to ensue when Ravus appears out of no-where. He and Seifer start arguing about whose coat is better whilst Ignis quietly disappears. XV → VIIINoctis: Ultimecia’s Castle. Noct is completely freaked BEFORE he sees Ultimecia so when she appears on the stairs he muffles a scream and hides hoping she didn’t see him. He hears her leave the room but continues to tense up in hiding. He whispers aloud, “If anyone is listening, please dear Six, I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve this but please please PLEASE send me back to Ardyn.”Prompto: finds himself flying on board the Ragnarok with Selphie in the driver’s seat. “Oh my god, THIS IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE REGALIA!” Starts taking photos without a second thought. Selphie teaches Prompto how to fly the Ragnarok and they swap every now and then with one flying and the other jumping up and down and yelling “WHOO-HOO!” Gladio: admiring Balamb Garden’s library. Spends ages looking through all of the collections. He finally settles on what looks like a good read when he sees a familiar looking blonde spiky haired kid in the corner of his eye. “HEY! CUP NOODLES ARE THE ULTIMATE FLAVOUR EXPERIENCE!!” Gladio then gives Zell a lecture on why cup noodles are better than hotdogs for the next few hours.Ignis: also ends up in Garden but in the cafeteria. He smells something delicious and the cafeteria lady gives him a plate with two hotdogs on. Ignis takes a bite and- “THAT’S IT! I’VE COME UP WITH A NEW RECIPEH!” Everyone in the room looks at him like he has three heads and Ignis suddenly feels extremely out of place and starts longing for his friends.Luna: Trabia Garden in the aftermath of the missile attack. At first she’s worried about where she is and why she’s ended up here but as soon as she sees there are people hurt and in pain, those thoughts are forgotten as she immediately proceeds to help the injured. Her first words are “I need some cloth to make bandages, STAT!” or some other statement that involves more professional medical terminology lmao.Aranea: appears to be in Galbadia, sitting on Edea/Ultimecia’s throne. “That’s it, I’m staying.” Aranea’s first words are before bossing Seifer around like a servant, getting him to fetch her cocktails and kneel on all fours before her so he can be her footstool. Cindy: in Dollet by the car that was crushed by X-ATM092. She’s almost heartbroken by the sight of it and knocks on the door closest to the car. When a couple answer it, Cindy’s first words escape her. “This might sound weird to y’all but… can I fix y’alls car?” Cindy has the door slammed in her face but doesn’t let it phase her. She proceeds to fix the car anyway and even gives it an upgrade.Bonus → XV chocobros after time compression stops and everyone is back home.At camp, Ignis is cooking dinner. Noctis and Prompto are salivating already. Gladio returns to camp a little later after doing a couple of more hunts and breathes in the aroma. “Mmm, Iggy, whatcha cookin’?” Ignis stares down at his grill and Noctis and Prompto look at each other with worried expressions. “Umm…” Ignis mumbles. Gladio walks over to Ignis and sees eight hot dogs on the grill. He frowns at Ignis and refuses to speak to him for the rest of the night. Safe to say, Gladio is extremely unimpressed. 

[irishcoffeeslushie]

Nobuta wo Produce review (excerpts) - II

Disclaimer: I didn’t write this, although I wish I had. Source.

The beauty of Nobuta wo Produce is that it doesn’t purport to be anything other than a high school drama, and that’s precisely what makes it so much more than just a high school drama. (Am I even getting my point across? Lol) What I’m trying to say is that the characters are every inch high school kids — no more, no less, neither dumbed down nor savvied up. But they speak from the heart because the writing keeps it all REAL and just lets the characters be themselves, be the thinking, feeling, self-aware teens that they are.

This drama explores the inner universe of adolescence, governed by its own whimsical vagaries and constant flux of emotions. And I love the judicious use of voice-overs as the main characters ponder such things as the future and the uncertainty of life. The dialogue is intelligent without being pseudo-intellectual, complex without being contrived (uh, Dawson’s Creek, anyone? man, talk about a series that tried too hard to be smart and deep and witty, but always felt like it was written by 40-year-olds *roll eyes*). The writing of NwP doesn’t try to be all these, it just IS. Just because the drama is about a bunch of high school kids doesn’t mean it has to be infantile and shallow, nor does it have to play at being implausibly grown-up.

The high school stereotypes are here in NwP, but with a distinctive Jdorama twist. True, the Class Clowns aka the Destiny Duo may not have the most gut-bustingly funny of spiels, but at least they never annoyed me, and always seemed to be having so much fun in their own little world — making funny puns, and punny fun. Beetlejuice Guy would be the closest thing to the resident Obsessive Basket Case, and adds a dash – just a dash! – of signature J-screwiness to the overall flavor of Class 2-B. Only Bando and the Bandettes are given the extreme treatment of all the 2-B students.

The grown-up characters are shown to NOT know all the answers to life, or possess the key to the Fount of Adult Wisdom. They’re mostly shown to be… big kids, really, just more beat-up around the edges and looking the worse for wear, maybe a little wiser and more jaded, and more accepting of the realities and disappointments of life. Hirayama the Tofu Guy (Takahashi Katsumi) provides a solid, comforting presence as Akira’s ever-obliging guardian — though not without his own share of regrets and hang-ups. Hirayama has an interesting dynamic not just with Akira, but with Akira’s volatile CEO father (Masu Takeshi). Both men take their stake in Akira’s upbringing quite seriously, but share an interesting “good cop, bad cop” approach to this responsibility. (LMAO @ the time both grown men bond while assembling the Nobuta keychains in Tofu Guy’s living room!)

I love how the Kiritani family feels like a real family — well, ¾ of a real family. And Nakajima Yuto as Shuji’s li’l bro Koji is the most perfect little boy you will ever lay eyes on… except that this was five years ago and he’s not so little anymore (heh heh). The scenes where the three Kiritani boys (small, medium and large) are just chillin’ at home — dad cooking dinner, Koji doing his homework, Shuji (with that topknot, lol!) patching up a torn sock — are always enjoyable to watch. Ditto the dynamic between Shuji and Koji — case in point: the moment the brothers share in the haunted house in Episode 3 is heartwarming without being hokey. It helps, of course, that Kame and Yuto (then a Johnny’s Jr. who also performed in the “Seishun Amigo” music video, poor kid, lol) share a wonderful on-screen chemistry.

The realism of Nobuta wo Produce doesn’t quite have the gritty, inner-city feel of, say, Dangerous Minds or Stand and Deliver, because there are offsetting moments of hyperreality (e.g. the horrific bullying, the vandalism/sabotage arc, the zany characters) as well as surrealism (e.g. the living spirits, the dream about Santa Claus, and the dream about Aoi) that all add flavor and character to the drama without overpowering its faithful depiction of Planet High School. This balancing act between hyperreal and surreal is a tricky line to tread: a production that exaggerates plot and characters will always feel facile despite any entertainment value (uh, Hana Kimi anyone?), while a drama that is too dependent on fantasy/dream elements can feel rarefied and thus run the risk of alienating the viewer.

The strength of NwP is that it doesn’t skew towards either extreme, but reaches a comfortable — yet dynamic — equilibrium, which is no small testament to the virtuosity of both writing and direction. The finished product retains its solid core of realistic narrative/character development and naturalistic technique, but is complemented by these pleasantly unexpected but contrasting touches of loopy Jdorama hyperbole and floaty phantasmagoria. This drama, ladies and gents, is pure magic realism at its working best.

… Such is the flipside of magic realism, this nebulous nexus of the strange, the dark, the frightening. The drama gives no explanation for the dream, and very wisely leaves it at that.

So, thanks to Nobuta wo Produce I will always, always, always hold Kame and Pi dear beyond words no matter what mess they’ve made — and continue to make — of their post-NwP career trajectories. Maki I remain fond of despite her lackluster performances in Hana Kimi and Kurosagi; I know I’ve been extra hard on her in my past reviews, but only because I think she’s capable of better things and hope a suitable film or TV project will eventually come her way. But my fondness for Maki is cosmically — cosmically I say!!! — eclipsed by all that I feel for Kamenashi of the pencil-thin brows, and Yamashita of the dead-fish stare. Now wait a minute, some of you might ask: How dare she even make that claim? Isn’t this E.G., who uses her blog to flay those boys alive as if there were no tomorrow? Isn’t she the harpy who likes to chain them to a rock and feast on their livers — again, and again, and again?

Er, yes on both counts. It’s haaard to explaiiiin, but the reason I rip these poor boys apart all the time is because I like to play with my food because they mean THIS MUCH to me. (Readers go, “Eeeehhh? Nandeee” *headscratch*) But see, such is the power of Shuji to Akira, that whatever Kame and Pi do in the years to come — whether as J-pop pinups warbling way off-key, or wannabe actors out to carve their own niche in the Leading Man Canon — I will be there to watch them, and love them in spite of it… maybe even because of it. Even if it makes my ears bleed, my eyeballs implode, and my spleen liquefy and dribble out the nearest body orifice (don’t ask which). I am their F-A-N, and their F-A-N for L-I-F-E — and all because of a pair of seventeen-year-old schoolboys who liked to bond over soy milk and take sunset bicycle rides together.

But I’m also the kind of fan who harbors no illusions about Kame and Pi’s dramatic abilities (for Pi, it’s the lack thereof haha); I’ve seen enough of their collective oeuvre (practically all of it, actually *blushes*) to know that Nobuta wo Produce is the best work they’ve ever done, or will ever get to do. (Like I said, that drama was puuure maaaagic!) Since NwP, each boy has made exactly ONE other drama I believe they can be proud of: Tatta Hitotsu no Koi for Kamenashi, and Proposal Daisakusen for Yamashita. (Never mind the rest; the rest are just the necessary evils you slog through to ultimately earn the title of “Kame/Pi Completist.” The reward? A 10-disc set of KAT-TUN+NEWS’ greatest hits. And a lifetime supply of cheap wine. *Kame fans remember Kami no Shizuku and promptly lapse into a coma* And one year’s subscription to AnAn. *Pi fans go: “YamaPi showah… chunyuu!”* Lulzzz)

Between the two, Kame is by far a more natural and versatile actor than his pink-loving seishun amigo; he does drama and comedy better than YummyPi my little Gummi Bear, who really can’t do much but… be himself. That’s why I’ve always thought that Yamashita Tomohisa’s best dramas — Lunch Queen, Stand UP!, and natch, NwP — worked so well because they just let him be his weird, spacey and endearing self — unlike the more recent ones which sucked the sweet, the warmth, the life out of the boy and left this… sleepwalking six-pack with deep-fried hair in his place.

And so, such has been my own “self-revelatory odyssey” that went from knowing nothing about these two boys a little over a year ago, to recoiling from the first photo of theirs (see above) that I came across (and it also made me go, “Egads, these kids look weeeiiirrrrd!” — sounds familiar? well hello-oo E.G.’s KimuTaku Space Odyssey, lol), to acquiring Nobuta wo Produce (I’d heard good things about this netizen hit, but left it on the back burner because of… said photo), to finally giving in and watching the damn drama. And just like my experience with Pride, the rest is history, my embarrassing (and at times, downright incomprehensible) Kame/Pi fangirly devotion lovingly smeared all over this blog. It’s too late to take it back, to act more dignified and unsullied by this dark, guilty pleasure of mine. But, hey — if Nobuta and Akira could live with their weird little selves, I suppose so can I.

And to end this review with the wise words of a Green Day song:

“Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go So make the best of this test, and don’t ask why It’s not a question, but a lesson learned in time It’s something unpredictable, but in the end it’s right. I hope you had the time of your life…”

To Shuji, Akira and Nobuta, I hope you had, and continue to have, the time of your life… because you sure as heck gave me mine.

[everythingmustgo]

gemini sun, aries moon, libra ascending. like i know this is a mess of a combination but am i,,, /completely/ screwed? love ya xoxo

I LAUGHED aw man that is a screwy combo but let me tell u this !!! geminis get a bad rep but I think theyre gr8? granted I only kno one gemini but shes cool nd idk why everyone seems 2 hate them sm ??? the whole bitchy two faced thing can b real in gemini friendships its tru but the whole divided personality is a lot more than just that? geminis r v often in two minds abt things, v indecisive, geminis r worriers man. they cant make decisions for shit. geminis feel like they hav two distinct sides to themselves, most often a fun, outgoing side nd the other a serious, introverted side. if ur close w a gemini ur gonna kno both sides of them but until then ur only likely to b shown one side of a gemini. whichever side they show can depend on factors like mood nd social circumstances. geminis r creative nd clever people who r open minded, clear headed nd quick learners, nd theyre often misjudged bc theyre easily written off as v one dimensional, when in fact they hav v rich, deep personalities, they just happen 2 divide them up. they can however hav p rocky relationships bc they completely lack commitment, nd despite what I said earlier. they can just b two faced bitches sometimes. aries moon can often manifest as anger lmao lots of aries moons r quite angry people but thats only one aspect of it nd fire signs hav a lot more than just. Pure Rage lol. aries is at the beginning of the zodiac nd is full of the energy of smth new, pure nd simple so most likely ur emotions hav a v raw, base feel to them as if u r feeling them for the first time. this means they r most often v strong as well. its not difficult for u to pinpoint exactly what ur feeling, nd u hav a strong need for control over them. an aries moon Hates the idea of being a slave 2 their emotions, nd avoids this as much as possible. a gemini w a moon in aries gains a lot of Fire from this lol they feel things w a kind of passion geminis usual dont w/o a fire sign in the mix. can def hav anger issues tho. aries like 2 b in control nd if they feel they r losing it they hav tendency to lash out to protect themselves. im seein a lot of libra risings here me nd my gf hav libra rising signs !!! honestly a lot of ppl think libras can b too scared of confrontation nd r a bit like geminis in that way but honestly? libras r so unproblematic like ya they wanna b on everyones side nd r scared of being disliked for their opinions but theyre just straight up nice 2 people man theyre so chill ? everyone loves libra risings tbh. geminis nd libras r similar in that theyre sooo indecisive but the difference is that geminis tend 2 hav two separate opinions they cant choose between while libras like to find a middle ground nd a way that suits everyone. seeing as libra is ur rising it might b that u show urself as being in the middle of two choices nd always on the fence in order to hide ur gemini feeling strongly both ways, as this would affect peoples opinion of u nd libra risings cant hav that !!! u hav a strong need for control but v little control as ur undecided on most things in ur life, u hav the appearance​ of someone who can get on w anyone bc u r for the most part, non-confrontational (unless its a touchy subject then ur aries can b Angery). geminis r people u wanna b close w tho I fully support this

ur Def not screwed mate u gotta lot of good things goin on there !!!

//talk 2 me abt astrology!!!//