#mfw I have to play this game

[cinderthewolflady]

Got you

[blirpus]

made the mistake of reading old texts with my ex 😃

its unbelievable how much shit i put up with. her being upset, me asking if theres anything i can do to make her feel better, her telling me to bring her a gun so she can end it all quickly and me fucking apologizing for making her feel that way

(this was after an argument that ensued when i left a call in panic as she started yelling at me)

[rosykims]

ok can someone please explain to me the durge background. like do we know Exactly what their life and childhood was like prior to the nautiloid or do we just know that they spent the last few years being violently deranged. like. have they been fucked up for their entire lives or does being a bhaalspawn kick in at a certain point like puberty ?

[accio-victuuri]

i have some time to spare cause i’m on weekend work shift so let’s all clown for a bit. starting off with yibo’s scandalous hair lol. i swear the HS is wang yibo wig and wang yibo long hair. we are all so invested huh? i’m on camp “it’s real hair”. if there is something artificial to it then maybe an extension of sorts to make it fuller. and what we all noticed is it looks kinda similar to what GG had. they both would probably grow their hair out long if they can. but sadly, they can’t due to work and other things.

in the meantime, i’m being delusional and wishing yibo’s hair for chanel will be the same as PD101.

yibo-official’s post too got me cackling. yibo with the bread in his bag. who are you delivering that to boy? to the love of your life who is so fixated on bread? 🤣

we also noticed some same vibes from their photos. drinking and with their feet propped up. i personally think this is not intentional, they just happen to have absorbed each other’s habit and it bleeds out in instances like this ⬇️⬇️⬇️⬇️

and here we go again with playing the game of who is this. i believe that it’s yibo and that plant proves it’s him because he has a photo with it on another set. but i get the clownery. i’m seeing the subtle similarity.

it’s not a secret that they can look alike in some ways so this is one of those. 🤷🏻‍♀️

what im 👀 tho is bobo’s photos with that white strip below like some polaroid but not really. i can see the intention but i understand that they don’t wanna make it too obvious. the polaroids were xz’s “thing” for mfw and doing the exact same thing will be too much and may provide an opportunity for hate.

P3 and P4 is a lovely coincidence. P3 is a drawing from a book XZ posted about. A man in jeans and a green jacket. now you have yibo with the same fit when he finished work today. 🙏🏼

and finally, this photo of yibo with fellow Lacoste ambassador Taylor Zakhar Perez. of course we all picked up the fact that he starred in red, white and royal blue. yaaaasss! two icons in shows representing 🏳️‍🌈! come on! he also allegedly has a boyfriend, which is well, good for you sir!

now we are all thinking if the boys got to watch that movie! 🤔

-END.

[pyrobot1cs]

i dont get how people can call sollux a loser he wins so much in the comic. i will now refresh some of these wins in the form of a greentext

> be me, goldblood mutant with x-men powers

> restore world-altering video game my powerful girlfriend found scraps of through just my knowledge of code

> form two teams to play this game. pitch flirt with my cute hemo-anon friend about it

> predict i will die

> die from vast glub

> hot fuschia princess kisses me back to life

> i have double the amount of extra lives. on account of my swagger

> beat sgrub with the rest of my session

> transported to meteor in The Veil

> be the most tech savvy troll on the meteor, explaining timeline communication on Trollian to other trolls

> robot ex apologizes to me and explodes

> in a red relationship with aforementioned princess

> princesses violet ex goes berserk

> get knocked out

> im the only survivor from the trolls that he attacked

> cute hemo-anon friend protects my knocked out body

> he drops me down a flight of stairs

> wake up

> lisp gone

> voices of the doomed gone

> fuck yes

> talk to hot girlfriend whos now a time god in the dream bubbles

> drive the meteor into The Green Sun with my x-men powers

> die again. only a little bit this time though

> half ghost now hanging out with my time god girlfriend

> fuck off from the meteor to chill with her in paradox space

> somewhere my half corpse gets prototyped

> fully alive again, also fully blind

> chilling

> mfw

[super-paper]

The Villains' Pastime: Gourmet Food Highlights

Another day, another event focused on the LOV and their targeted psychic attacks on Skeptic's blood pressure (+ ReDestro's wallet)

The event starts with the gang fully embracing the freeloader lifestyle: lounging around and playing cards, ordering premium food on the PLF's dime, and doing absolutely nothing to actually help out with running the organization they violently took over like a week ago.

Everyone praises Tomura for being good at cards, with Compress and Twice wondering how he can be so good at reading others even though most of them are wearing masks. Jin then proceeds to shout out what his hand is, solving part of the mystery behind Tomura's undefeated winning streak in record time.

They want to play another game, but Tomura shoots them down bc it's close to noon and he's hungry. They agree to stop playing cards and get some lunch, and start talking about what sort of gourmet (read: expensive) foods they should try next. Tomura breezily talks about how nice it is to finally have money to burn (he's the worst ♥️), which inevitably summons Skeptic from the fourth ring of hell to bitch everyone out about wasting the PLF's precious funds.

"Thanks a bunch~" If Skeptic murks you in your sleep, you really only have yourself to blame Mister.

No one does "endearing in a criminally insane way" quite like Tomura. 😬

Trumpet senses that things are about to get ugly (or that skeptic is about five seconds away from a full blown hypertensive crisis) and intervenes, suggesting that they play a game of cards-- If Tomura wins, the PLF will foot the bill. If Skeptic wins, they either have to pay for their own lunch or just go hungry.

Tomura (quite predictably) says "fuck that" and tells Spinner just to go buy them lunch at a convenience store.

>be me >be stuck in a secret base hidden deep in the mountains >be literally miles away from civilization and the nearest town >tfw warp gate is doing ten-to-life and warp sludge is being gatekept by the world's most toxic Ivo Robotnik cosplayer 😔 >my boss, fully aware of all the above, orders me to walk to the nearest town and buy him a frozen burrito from a gas station >mfw

IS THIS YOUR MAN, SPINNER.

Tomura lightly bullying his friends and making unreasonable requests is nothing new, but this one strikes me as hilariously mean spirited even by his standards bc it’s also implied Tomura expects Spinner to foot the bill on top of all that:

BRO FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE ELSE 😭

Trumpet eventually convinces Tomura that it would actually (read: obviously) be faster to just settle the issue with a game of cards-- Tomura finally gives in, and they settle on a game of blackjack.

Compress explains the rules of blackjack and offers to deal the cards-- Trumpet shuts this down immediately and says that HE will deal the cards, thank you very much:

As an aside, I love how utterly shameless they make Compress in these events lmao.

Tomura and Skeptic begin their game, and Tomura quickly makes it apparent that he approaches blackjack with the same suicidally reckless abandon as he does pretty much everything else:

Out of context MHA, eat your heart out.

Spinner, Compress, and Dabi all worry that Tomura has drawn too many cards and is gonna lose by default, but Jin and Himiko both express their faith in his abilities as an ill-gotten bread winner (<3)

Tomura and Skeptic both reveal their hands, and we hard cut to the aftermath where the LOV are gushing about all the high quality meat they bought on the PLF's dime while Skeptic seethes in the corner.

>Tomura

> making logical choices

well, there's your first mistake.

Trumpet tells Skeptic to stop being a hater and dig in, casually siding with the LOV now that they've won their premium beef:

Trumpet:

Like a true politician.

The lunch party continues until ReDestro enters the scene... gushing about some high quality meat he managed to get ahold of and asking the League if they'd like some hot pot. :) Skeptic realizes his life is a cosmic joke. The event ends.

Bonus Stuff:

This is starting to feel less like a case of the LOV simply liking sushi and more like a united effort to haze Dabi. Deserved, tbh.

Jin telling Himiko to eat her veggies and Compress fondly watching her eat her weight in meat......... they r SO cute wtf..................,😭

>I start joking about Tomura being the most rancid godawful tsundere in existence

>somewhere out there, apollo draws back his dodgeball arm

He sure complains a lot for someone who grumpily indulges their every whim, huh.

[fllagellant]

It’ s so weird that Wyll has so … little to say when you’ re actually in Baldur’ s Gate . Why isn’ t he trying to check old places he remembers being at . Why isn’ t he wondering where a shop has gone or why they changed the gates at a park . Why isn’ t he trying to talk to old people he knew . Why isn’ t he trying to sneak around Wyrm’ s Rock . He would know the out of the way doors and the best hiding spots . Why doesn’ t he demand to visit his family estate and see if anyone there has managed to avoid a tadpoles fate .

+ the fact the game ( if you break the pact at least ) REALLY doubles down on Wyll only doing it for his own power play but what if you had quest to help his father ( or himself ) secure power again in Baldur’ s Gate . Why is there no “ steal these documents from Gortash to learn where Duke Ravengard is “ why is there no “ Expose lies to the Baldur’ s Gazette “ quest to help make the citizens start to look down upon Gortash . No infiltrate coronation ball quest at all ????? Why is there NOTHING ..

Also sorry . Mizora does not need to fucking be at the camp . “ Zariel’ s protection “ means nothing . I don’ t even get a persuasion check to try and make her go ? Not even one intimation check ?? You can go to the house of hope but you cannot find anything that might force Mizora to Go Away ? The fact she starts to fuck with people like Florrick to try and ruin Wyll and she’ s always back at camp ??? Would have made more sense if she wasn’ t there at all .

Mfw I get to Baldur’ s Gate the name of the Game and it feels like a two sentence foot note

[sugar-masochist]

you should play ghost trick phantom detective!! why? well... *grabs your shoulders and looks at you painfully while trying to form words

*cannot form words, starts crying uncontrollably at you*

*has a heart attack and dies*

>mfw when i get magic ghost powers and a lamp talks to me

*reverses time 4 minutes to complete a series of rube golberg-esque decisions that stops me from having a heart attack and dying*

Yeah so it's just like, a really good game. The music is absolutely banger!

[sun-marie]

1 and 16 from the oc ask for lydia and sabina! :3

ahh thank you for the ask!!

1. What was the original thought that led to the creation of this character?

Lydia: So i've mentioned this before, but from the moment I finished Tresspasser the first time and saw that we were going to Tevinter I knew I wanted my future PC to be from the Imperium. The concept didn't fully develop (partially due to the fact that up until Veilguard's new name dropped, I'd fully given up on seeing a fourth Dragon Age game) until the first trailer showcasing all the companions, and then I was like "oh crap i do actually have to come up with a new character for this game".

Her appearance, actually, takes a lot of inspiration from my og Inquisitor, Irithiel Lavellan, (medium dark skin, brown hair, golden eyes, etc.) who I really was not vibing with anymore as Inquisitor and wanted to repurpose some of her design. Then they released the faction backgrounds and i fell in love with the concept of the Lords of Fortune, and the rest is history <3

Sabina: Sabina originally started out as a dwarf, purely bc Old Vailia sounded like the coolest background and I think in it's description it mentioned that a lot of dwarves live there, but due to PoE's isometric POV and the fact it didn't really play into her character that much i kept forgetting that 😅 So in Deadfire i ended up changing her to a Meadow Folk, and I think that's when the current Sabina really started to take shape. I really loved Deadfire's pirate aspects and had really been wanting to play a character who used a rapier, so when I replayed the first PoE i changed her class from ranger (with a bear companion) to a Rogue, and then when I replayed Deadfire I kinda fell in love with the model of the Stag, and with the birth of Eamoc as her ranger companion (giving her the "scout" class) Sabina achieved her final, current form <3

16. Is there any memes or running jokes associated with the character, both in- and out of universe?

Hmmm 👀

Lydia:

🥲

"mfw the elven god of lies and betrayal betrays me -"

also see "Mind Tits" from previous ask game <3

Sabina:

*sticks her hand directly into Suspicious Hole*

After Caed Nua is destroyed:

Character Asks Game

[lytorika]

mfw my Rook is named Johann and they're a necromancer and they have a thing for immortality and i find this really cool weapon with lifesteal and lean into it and then romance Emmrich. and his nemesis is named Johanna and she's a necromancer with a thing for immortality. and i genuinely did not know any of this information before playing the game

[pleasantspark]

>Play a game >Game has a TEXT OPENING WITH NO FUCKING SKIP BUTTON >fuckthisdoireallyhavetositthroughthisshit.jpg >Complain through the entire opening >Skip through it by mashing the a or bottom screen >Finished the tutorial and intro >Get into the game >Confused on why the game isn't working >"WHY WON'T THIS GAME WOOOOOORK!" >Mfw the game doesn't work because I decided to let my ADHD win and impatience rule over by losing out against a important tutorial that could've gotten me to the next level without searching a million gaming boards because the prima guide I don't have.

[saltminerising]

sorry gonna have to format this as a greentext cause this is just so comically bad it makes me want to laugh and also die

> be me

> rediscover flight rising after a few years of not playing

> log onto old account, find all my childhood dragons + items, start having a blast

> 3 weeks in, remember i'm an adult now with adult money instead of being a broke 13 year old

> decide to splurge a bit, spend $50 on gems, have the time of my life getting to do everything i wanted as a kid including making dream dragons with genes/apparel i could never get before

> start to genuinely get into the game for real again, log on every day, chat on the forums, make friends, so happy to have all my old dragons + retired items i'd collected back then, absolutely balling

> be me, 2 weeks later, sitting down at desk after a long workday, excited to play more

> try to log on

> account closed

> confused. send appeal. get response.

> apparently made another account when i was 13 that i genuinely have no recollection of. been living in the same childhood house with the same internet provider, so still had the same i.p address

> no response when asking for alternate accounts details, just get told i can go ahead and make a new account if i want

> that was a week ago

> quite literally had no idea about the decade old multiaccounting, so genuinely did not think i was at risk in any way and spent weeks investing time love and money into this game without knowing

> had also loaned 2 really nice people's dragons for a breeding project i was doing, which i'd done with the full belief that i'd be able to return them

> mfw i realize dragons, apparel, items, achievements, treasure, and money i spent on gems are basically gone forever because of a single alt account i'd apparently made a decade ago and had no memory of creating

> mfw i realize 2 innocent people are now not gonna be able to get their dragons back from me because i had 0 warnings or signs that my account was at risk

> mfw i realize i'm literally never getting childhood account back

do sort of wish they would've closed my account in the month they had before i dropped $50+ on this game and loaned dragons from others 😇😇😇 #flightrisingbestgameintheworld

previous greentext anon would also like to state i did make a new account just so i could contact the two people i loaned those dragons from and explain the situation. i'm planning on purchasing gems one last time just so i can send it to them to make up for this, considering they were unfairly wrapped up in this and are presumably never getting their dragons back. after thats sorted out... hasta la vista sornieth ✌ those were a very fun few weeks of ignorant bliss and i genuinely want to play more pretty bad, but i'm not gonna spend hours grinding and spend god knows how much money trying to rebuild all that again.

[beevean]

Nuke Sage. She brings nothing to the table lol

So far, she really hasn't.

I know that many people love her. Some love her arc, how she develops emotions and the need for a familial bond. Others love how efficient she allegedly is, how utterly loyal to Eggman she is even after she grows a heart. I know this, but there is nothing about her that appeals to me. She's bland, quirkless (she supposedly told Eggman one joke, offscreen), repetitive in her dialogue, the discount copy of Rei Ayanami and more blatant about it than the Death Egg, and her sacrifice for the sake of her "father" was literally nullified twice over.

Oh, you enjoy her because she develops emotions? Gamma is literally right there. And his sacrifice stuck. And I got to play as him and experience his change of heart. Frontiers' story is just a half-baked SA1, and that game already needed more time in the oven. no you cannot @ me.

And we talked multiple times how she's actually not as impressive as the game makes her out to be, and by all means, Eggman should have lost his patience the moment she kept insisting that he needed to team up with Sonic, like he did when Infinite disappointed him one too many times. mfw in the Japanese script, Eggman ends up saving himself from Cyberspace because Sage is that incompetent lmao

And the writing itself flipsflops between "Eggman is only proud of her because she's so impressive that it shows how great he is" (mostly in the missable memos) and "Eggman genuinely cares about his daughter and cries when she has to die and call her his daughter and adorable and holds her hand in the DLC and genuinely ponders whether she likes being called 'she'." It's... forgive me for the joke... wildly inconsistent :P

^ the thing is not that he assigned a gender to a creation of his, because he calls most of his robots "he", it's nothing new. The thing is that he actually stops in his tracks and questions if Sage would prefer "she" over "it". It's that he cares about her opinion, when by all means he shouldn't give a single shit about an AI's preference.

Then you add how fans, already juiced up over years of discourse on Mr. Tinker, took this undecisive writing and decided that this is proof that Eggman was Not So Bad After All, that he has a good heart deep down, that this sudden love for his "daughter" is what finally makes him human and tridimensional! They Fixed The Bad Character! Now yes I shouldn't base my opinions on the fandom, but as I said, if Flynn's intentions were to paint Eggman as a self-centered creator, he did a very poor job, because there is a reason the voice director ordered Pollock to sound like he was in tears when he said lines like "I understand. Go, fulfill your function".

And the kicker? Sage hasn't made a meaningful appearance yet. She cameo'd in MOSTH, looking sad and red/black instead of blue/white, and she's nowhere to be seen in Eggman's dreams in Dream Team, which lowkey implies that he actually doesn't love her as much as it seemed like in Frontiers.

but in the Takeover that everyone will take as gospel, Eggman says that she is the reason he keeps existing. Who wrote that. How can you put those words in that order in Eggman's mouth. And fans not only gush about how cute this is, but roll their eyes that Sonic is bored at this wildly OOC display of affection.

Sure, as a character she barely existed for one year, there's plenty of time for her to come back and finalize Eggman's direction. But yeah... so far she hasn't done anything to ingratiate me.

[accio-victuuri]

some february fake rumors 💭

i am referencing these two contributions here & here. while we’re preparing ourselves for the chaos of xz’s mfw appearances, let’s enjoy these sweets first!

i’m using a very sexy xiao laoshi just because… 🤷🏻‍♀️

the first one is so funny and nostalgic with how it was presented. usually, fake rumors are in conversation form or in paragraphs. or, at some point, there is a story and then OP will include stick drawings to better explain what’s happening. this was popular when the topic are unofficial bts content before the videos were released.

this contribution tho only had the stick figure 😂😂

you can clearly see what’s the “story” here. lol. the two of them were caught by someone. this is not the first time a story like this came out but seeing it this way is entertaining. fans are also pointing out what they are doing, the faces are so close! kissing! 💋

the second one goes back to the usual format of conversations.

the first part is a staff telling yibo that be brought so much and then wyb says he doesn’t have the car to carry the stuff. he also said he has divided it, to which another staff says it’s easier for them. they tell wyb that he should eat more mandarin oranges.

wyb: Yo, you’re back

wyb: Come on, I brought everything with me.

xz: If I don’t eat, I’ll stay up late tomorrow and die of swelling.

xz: gone

🏃🏃🏃🏃

wyb: Look at me going all the way here and you’re ignoring me.

xz: Aren’t you pretty good at the game?

wyb: That's different

xz: Why is it different? Please explain it carefully.

wyb: Fierce me 🥹👈🏻Brother x, look at everything about him

xz: 🙄🤛🏻

wyb: If you don’t eat carbohydrates, your temper will get worse.

LOL. Years later, WYB is still worrying over XZ and what he eats lol. and how WYB wants all of XZ’s attention, and his gege playing along. I can imagine him saying “please explain it”.

staff 2: 🍊 So delicious

staff 1: I’ll take two more

xz: You guys eat so much

xz: Come, come here

i love how wyb’s love language is giving gifts, and it shows here. this is allegedly a fake scenario during the CNY holidays, and ofc, Bobo won’t forget gifts for XZ’s staff as well! what a good brother in law!

🚪🚪🚪🚪

I don’t know anything. I only know how to eat. You can talk wherever you like. Where can we go to talk? We'll make up soon anyway.

🚪🚪🚪🚪

xz: Okay, I won’t argue with you anymore. I went back to take a shower and sweated all over.

wyb: Then I’ll go back too

xz: You eat here and eat with them

wyb: I’m afraid of getting swollen even if I don’t eat.

xz: Okay?

wyb: ☺️☺️🥰

wyb: Withdrawal ✋🏻

wyb: You should ☺️ take a sip to reduce swelling.

xz: you😂

xz: Is it okay if I ask Brother A to buy red beans for me?

wyb: Let’s go upstairs☺️

The use of the door here and this commentary from the OP made fans think of the “drawing” from the rumor i discussed first. It’s like OP is implying that he was only there to enjoy the food from wyb. The previous convo looks like the two are bickering, but they will be sweet later. make up soon? what does that mean? Did OP see them kissing?

P.S: if you have a weibo account, please like all the comments with yellow circles in this xzs new post. take this as a reminder to do the same for the MFW posts in the coming days. 💪🏼 we have to show our support! XZ will most likely post on IG too, so this is your reminder to follow him.

-END.

[blueflyingturtleontheway]

be me

dad is a bigwig in the military so expected to follow his steps

a fucking political revolt happens just as i was supposed to start my career

the old queen was apparently a colonizer and a murderer

never really cared about politics so its whatever

big changes because of the new government get promoted faster

hell yes

they need new people so a bunch of tournaments happens

mfw some random ass baker gets promoted to the same rank despite no military background

but whatever

finally get assigned as a private guard to the princess

but of course not the hot one whos apparently the ruler now but her 10yo sister

that was not in the job description

fast forward a few months theres a big olaball game with another kingdom

been playing my whole life so easily get on the national representation

the hot princess is on the team too

finally my chance to shine

twist my ankle literally the day before the big game

areyoufuckingkiddingme.gif

of course the baker guy takes my place

dont know he even plays the stupid game

apparently hes super bad so at least itll be fun to see him make a fool of himself

day of the game

hes a fucking machine on the field

apparently hes been training with the princess the whole night

yeah i bet they were

fast forward a year

old captain retires

itsfinallymychance.exe

of course they have to make another stupid competition out of it

and of course baker boy gets in

and the princess acts as if hed already won

realise the whole competition is probably rigged

finally say what everyone is thinking about the baker boy

he wants to fight over it

finally a reason to beat his stupid ass

beat him

cant even enjoy it because some woman from a museum needs a package delivered

of course baker boy volunteers like the boy scout he is

competition is about to start

finally feel good because i know i can beat him in a fair fight

baker boy comes with a new sword new voice and some new cringy nickname

wtf

doesnt matter obstacle course starts

outrun the other two guys immediately

baker boy does some fucking triple backflips and one arm pushups AND KEEPS BEING FASTER

and then fucking trips me when i almost outrun him

make it second to the finish line and baker asshole fucking mocks me

and then shamelessly flirts with the princess

next day last stage of the competition

finally outrun him

the last obstacle

the rope snaps and i twist my fucking ankle AGAIN

baker guy comes back for me instead of winning

insists we cross the finish line together

doesnt even bat an eye when the princess says therell need to be some extra qualifications probably

thatsitisntit.jpg

hes just fucking better

speak up for him

he gets the fucking promotion

Whats even the point

[puttlefish]

kcd2 thotts (spoilers: it was rly goode [+ actual spoilers])

^^^ mfw when ppl give me verbal instructions btw

ANYWAY this is long sry (18 pages 🤪)

In short: It was v goddamn good. I haven't felt so compelled and invested in a game since I played RDR2 (which I consider to be a near-perfect story & gaming experience), and I would say the world/story/characters/dialogue/questions of morality in this are 100% on par with Red Dead. I might even venture to say the emotional high of this surpassed the one in RDR2, and THAT'S SAYING SOMETHING

click more if u dare 🫵

My novella on the story & characters & Hans romance will start soon but I do wanna talk about the game play a bit.

Goode things:

I love dialogue trees and making choices & decisions, and this game is 70% that. A real conversation simulator which is extra enjoyable thanks to the voice acting being genuinely pretty great (especially Hans, whose VA was sublime, and Henry, whose VA has a unique voice & talks kinda weird--plz kno I mean in the best way possible)

There are like 500 side quests/tasks and they never felt repetitive or grindy

I admire the array of approaches you were encouraged to experiment with. I felt like very few quests could only be handled in one way and it overall did a good job of letting you pick, settle, and commit to a play style (in regards to both class fantasy & RP)

Love love love all the hats and dressing up you can do. I'm glad both you and your horse could look like clowns tho I do wish you could mix and match the horse gear

In spite of me stripping away all the nuance from the combat system (I own up to this being a skill issue on my part, but also, I Do Not Care About It) I think the way you build up your skills and learn combos by actually verbally learning about the technique is neat

Much like RDR2 this was a game with a dozen systems what made it so I never felt bored (and thnx to mods you could just remove the ones you didn't like lol)

They also did a FANTASTIC job incorporating period appropriate motifs into the UI. That was one of my favorite things about RDR2 and KCD2 did an equally bang up job. I def can see this being to medieval nerds what RDR2 was to me as a late-19th century enjoyer

- Even though this historic period has never been of much interest to me, I can see the work and dedication that went into representing it as accurately as they could. The lil lore books & scholarly tidbits were a fun way to directly engage with the historical aspects of this story & I liked that they would talk about how/why they changed things/took liberties/etc

They understandably reused the same VAs and faces & only had like 1 body type for mas/fem but idk I thought it was kind of endearing lol

- It was like the NPCs were actors who would show up to play a different role

- also it was hilarious when I would talk to an enrobed scribe/priest/nerd and then later I'd see them asleep & they would be absolutely RIPPED. Was always funny, never got old lmao

Not as goodly:

The combat felt like absolute ass and I straight up would not have been able to play this without mods

The animal AI feels dated but I don't hold it too much against them. Resources were obviously invested much better elsewhere + also RDR2 ruined all animals in all games forever for me cus their creature AI was absolutely top-notch

More of a 'not for me' than an actual complaint, but I did not care @ all about the mechanics that existed to serve immersion. You bet some of the first things I downloaded were mods that got rid of weight bearing/hunger/affected walk speed/inventory decay/etc.

- RDR2 has all those elements as well but it was not as ingrained as a core system so was more manageable for me (who historically doesn't give a shit about survival in games)

Obvs mods make a lot of things optional but then there are other QOL features which do not exist because they were never gonna be part of the program.

I would have killed for a mini map (I HATE COMPASSES) and I wish there was an official toggle for 1st/3rd person view. Riding a horse feels floaty and bad but the moment you switch to 3rd person (mod) it feels very natural and like you can actually navigate around ppl in the big city & towns.

ENOUGH OF THAT NERD SHIT story time 😏

^^^ immersive RP'ing

Don't actually wanna write a novella but I know me, so praying to god (like henry from kcd2 does) for bulletpoints to save me.

SPOILERS: THEY DON'T!!! FAILING TO BE AS BROAD AS POSSIBLE, here are some highlights I liked (in great detail:)

I liked that ppl would accuse you of being a wizard/sorcerer/warlock and Henry could 100% go along with it and watch them freak out. I loved the random encounter where the priest shows up (in all black) with a squad of inquisitors from Italy??? to hunt the demonic warlock that's been spotted in the area??? and Henry's just like, "So. You found me. What now?" and then you kick all their asses. Excellent encounter. Also he makes this smug face:

I adored that quest where there's the stinky Hell pit and the villagers + local church guy are arguing about it being either superstitions and/or 'something actually from hell' but then when you go down there there's a knight in plate that is so so so rusty/dirty, is speaking in Latin, and is running around the tunnel REALLY FAST and ur just like um??? WHAT??? prolly my favorite side quest

- + the fact that all his armor is at like 0 quality + you get to see the absurdity of what some ppl with do in the name of God & Faith

- Glad this game didn't shy away from those instances

- O also and the fact that you couldn't pry off his helmet was neat

Even tho the world & the characters are very Christian given the historic precedence, there were a lot of opportunities to explore folklore and old beliefs. I liked that you could be curious about it and were not forced to be like 'um actually' and dismissive w/ a Christian outlook (direct contrast w/ how some NPCs would do this).

Adored that Henry could get caught up in the moment/drama of ppl's stories. They be like, "Ya I think a vampire is haunting my barn??" and Henry will be like "WHAT! omg??" and then you both get to learn that it was just like... some dude from the town w/ beef who was grieving the quest giver

It was good to see Henry be thoughtful and considerate whenever something would challenge a world view he had. RP-wise, consistently indulging that kind of curiosity made Henry more interesting & complex; you def come into the start of the game as a Good Christian who knows how the world works, but then you are consistently meeting people/cultures who do not fit into that mold

- The nomads challenged what life is 'supposed to be like'

- The cumans you befriend challenged Henry's condemnation & biased preconceptions of an entire ppl based only on his personal experiences

- Talking to folks from small villages that were not as roped up by the church (and therefore held on to some old beliefs & customs) challenged the Irrefutable Truth of the church's organized interpretations of faith

- Seeing humble people do noble things & nobles committing acts of selfishness/greed/savagery/etc challenged the status quo & questions the structure of society as a whole

- And obv these + others paved the way, stone by stone, to broaden your perspective. It allows for something personally significant and potentially existential (like falling in love with Hans) to not only be possible, but something you could allow yourself to pursue

I swear the fireflies are manifestations of this?? Sometimes they are just around (just as many things can be around without an obvious purpose) but they did often lead you to treasures and POIs that were death related and/or pagan in nature. Also they show up when ur parents come to scold you for looting corpses, so there u go: proof

Sigismund surprised me. They did a good job of showing all the council members shitting themselves when he showed up to the convention, but I was like 👀 when he looked at Henry (who was specifically told not to look the king in the eyes since he wasn't worthy of it, etc etc) and told him--almost kindly???--that he had nothing to fear (and then looked up @ the council and was like UNLIKE THESE IDIOTS sigismund has surprise good humor surrounding him).

- They did a good job demonstrating his intimidation & terrifying reputation yet still managed to humanize him in very small but impactful ways.

- Like, clearly he told Vavak to increase the miner's pay to stop their rebellions so that they could mine more silver for him, and u kno he ain't advocating out of the goodness of his heart, but he still improved the lives for every miner in the region with just 1 command (rather than taking it out on them violently/ruining them to teach a lesson/etc)

- And then he offers to share wine with Henry as a mark of appreciation, even tho he's just a lil waiter boy, but idk it shows that he isn't blind to the existence of common folks like how a lot of lords and nobles tend to be

Istvan was v good. It really stuck with me when Henry has the nightmare after standing his ground & refusing to burn Malechov, where Istvan shows up and is like, "Good job you did it, you upheld ur honor and saved the ppl and all it costed was the lives of half your men. Was preserving your good conscious worth their deaths?"

- And like, yes, obviously! Big difference between villagers being murdered vs soldiers dying. But still, it makes Henry question the price of honor and I am always a fan of that kind of scrutiny being applied to things we have a tendency to blindly uphold as 'something good'. Even if the answer is 'no,' the ability to question it is what's most important.

- You set your own code of honor and the things you do will feel easier to live with so long as you didn't betray your ethics

- That being said, it can be seen as an incredibly selfish stand to make. Honor can be a moral guide as much as it can be an excuse, and that is such an important concept to weigh on Henry's shoulders

Van Aulitz scene was SO GOOD!! I didn't play the first game (yet) so I don't have like a narrative hatred for this dude who has been in the game for like... maybe 10 minutes total before this scene, but I cannot believe this was a missable conversation. I have complaints about how the game classifies your choices for it (more on that later) but I will just say that they did a good job delivering the argument of 'beneath the name, titles, armor, and deeds--there is just a man.'

- I think this is a core concept that Henry has to come to terms with (for enemies and allies, and himself ofc) and adds a lot of complexity to his motives and drives

Ok obviously there is more I liked but MY GOD that's enough for now

Disappointments:

Ok Hans just miraculously getting over his trauma was weird?? Idk maybe there is precedence for that happening, plus you could argue that the claustrophobia was representative/adjacent to something else relating to his headspace/growth/arc/gay thoughts/ etc, but idk I felt like things were building up to a potentially very big confrontation w/ that fear but then it just didn't.

Actually, his rescue from Malechov I thought would be a lot different. Mostly because:

-A few things made me aware of a 'tunnel scene' and lo, here was that tunnel

- The entire time you're traversing it, Henry's like "This is so cool. X will come in handy when Hans and I are escaping," | "Oh! So all Hans and I will have to do it pull down this beam to collapse this stone in front of the door!" "When me and Hans, as two conscious and able bodied individuals--" like his whole plan doesn't even consider the possibility that Hans would be anything other than completely fine

- And why wouldn't he?? Every time Henry would express concern about Hans & how long he'd been captive, everyone would brush it off and be like, "He's a noble, he'll be fine, don't worry about it," and ofc Henry would have no reason to doubt this after so many ppl say it

- So all that (plus a few other things I saw out of context) I thought for sure when you got there that things would be worse than you assumed and that you'd p much have to carry him out.

- And I ESPECIALLY thought this because one of the first things you come across in the tunnel (re: tantalizingly close to the exit but not out of the thick of it yet) is the ladder, which you will need to scale up the steep drop, and would be trapped/cornered without. As soon as you step on it there's even an audible CRACK sound and Henry's like, "lol I hope it can hold at least ONE invader (:" so imagine the drama if it had to carry the weight of two ppl, least they both be captured :/

- WHATEVER lmao all the right details fell in exactly the wrong order here I guess

Zizka airing out all of Kathrine's dirty laundry after she all but begged Henry not to pry. AND this directly proceeded her romance scene?? Like I get the intent behind it I just wish they did not feel the need to lay it all out.

- Zizka could have easily just skipped the story and spoke to how she feels about Henry (which would be gratifying to ppl who are pursuing her) but now it's like... why did I hear that all from him? Why wasn't that a special scene that was only unlocked if you got a certain reputation with her?

- Also idk learning that she is a widow who also grieved for a lost child, with their doomsday clock @ 5 minutes til midnight, felt like either:

1) They didn't give such trauma the space it needed to be handled well

or

2) A last minute injection of drama to sweeten the deal?? Which I didn't think they needed to do.

- Katherine is a strong character on her own, they did not need to pull the rug from under her feet like that lol

Speaking of ladies and how they go hand-in-hand with romance: Rosa felt like a... weird option, to say the least. I am fully prepared to chalk this up to timing on my end (I paced my game by doing a shitton of side quests and then sprinkling in a MSQ as an occasional treat) but I felt like she was kinda too young LOL

- TO BE FAIR I think Henry and Hans are like... 20 y/o MAX so it's not like there's an egregious age difference (historical precedence for girls getting married young non withstanding) but I feel like every time I talked to her or learned anything about her, it happened to involve recalling something in her childhood/youth/etc so idk I started to associate her with that age??

- She also feels like the most wish-fulfillment option of the main 3 so idk maybe that's subtly putting me off. For the record I do like her character (more on it later) but I did not like her as a romance option @ all

As I mentioned earlier; never played the first game, so a lot of the personal enemies/vendettas Henry has aren't super familiar to me. But as Denny pointed out Istvan & Erik being something of a foil to Hans & Henry (noble & peasant orphan, similar power dynamic, guy with inherent political power/intuition & guy immense physical power, and rounding it out with a relationship that isn't easy for anyone else but you two to understand) had the potential to be an interesting parallel to draw.

- Obviously this is complicated by the nature of Hans/Henry being a choice and not canon (arguably lol even if you play Henry as straight I still feel like at least one or both of them has feelings, they would just be more unspoken), but I would've liked to see this explored more

Also, all the ppl Henry built up in his mind as irredeemable monsters keep showing him layers of humanity he either refused to believe or didn't know existed. Especially since the main three each reveal something different??

- Sigismund is a cruel butcher --> He is the only one in that room who treated you like a person

- Von Aulitz is a blood thirsty murderer --> He remembered ur father and understands the moral cost of war

- Istvan is a heartless monster --> He and Erik loved each other

So idk what I would want, but I can feel an absence of something. Like, idk, maybe if you had picked a few of the care/romance options with Hans (cus you get a few throughout the first half of the game) Istvan could have called attention to the difference in power dynamic or status to try and turn Henry's affection for Hans against him, since that seems to be the low blow/pain point whenever he & da boi are in contention with one another.

- Especially cuz Henry himself kept accusing Istvan (and then Erik, later) that their relationship was a farce, that as the powerful noble Istvan must have had ulterior motives for seducing Erik's loyalty, etc.

- These kinds of accusations could easily be reflected back at Hans in order to try and plant the seeds of doubt for Henry's devotion to him

- Would have been interesting to see what kind of humanity Henry could glimpse/learn from Erik, since they both occupy a similar role, but his book hasn't been closed yet so I suppose there's still a chance

^^^ me & my beloved sack of flour <3

Aight so the entire conversation with von Aulitz was fantastic. Some genuinely thoughtful & engaging deconstructions about all kinds of relevant and topical themes for Henry and KCD2's themes. I don't remember them @ all rn but they are good!!!

ANYWAY since Henry entered that room ready to stab & kill & murder him, but left it feeling disquieted and somber, I feel like von Aulitz's words rang some amount of truth & clarification to him, leaving Henry to reflect honestly on who he is, what he's done, and how it's different (or not) from what Aulitz, Zizka, or anyone else does things.

You walk away feeling like you put all your eggs in the basket of killing this guy and feeling gratified, but instead, he's given you a new perspective which does not attempt to excuse or justify anything he's done, but it helps Henry to understand a great many things.

- Because of this, I gave him the honorable death of dying on his feet, but the game classified that as a Bad Ending choice???

- To imply that I gave into darkness by indulging vengeance?? Which feels contradicting to Istvan's suggestion of honor being a mess that you've already forgiven yourself for???

- 'Let [them] live' is not always the good choice. Von Aulitz was just another piece in someone else's game. He did not condone or condemn Sigismund, he just did what he was asked to given the circumstances he was in. This isn't said to defend his actions but it is established to show him as a complicated human being who was living in complicated times.

- If anything he said spoke to you, even just as the dying words of someone who didn't have anything to lose, idk how letting him live and thus succumbing to a slow & painful death is the GOOD choice?? The nice thing to do??? The thing you look back on and have no regrets about???

- EVEN MORE SO cuz he specifically requested that you kill him??? You literally select 'Give him an honorable death' but then it reflects dishonorably in the end. How???

Again I don't have the full history of this dude with Henry's past traumas, but if you let him speak I feel like Henry is objectively moved by what he said by the time he gets to make this decision.

^^^ Do u ever come home in the middle of the night after an exhausting couple of days only to find that ur precious platonic best friend has claimed the second bunk in ur room and u cannot help but to take a moment to stare longingly @ his sleeping face (with an oddly low-quality jpeggy eye and from a masculine distance) knowing that he's finally safe??? #DUDEthings

Anyway 💅 characters time:

I feel like most of this is already a tribute to what I like about Henry, so I'll just say he has a pleasantly surprising personality in a game that has the potential to go full edgelord. He's very endearing and I like him a lot <3

I adore Hans. He's such a brat but ya boi gets humbled in major ways during the events of this story and that's great. I fell in love with him when you get to Troskowitz (??? every town in the Trosky region has Trosk% in the name lmao) and you can have a really long back-n-forth argument trying to convince him to move sacks of flour with you. It just keeps going and he keeps fighting you about it but then you also keep clapping back almost infinitely.

- And then you get to do this with him again when you're locked up in the pillory <3

- It's an excellent start to their dynamic cuz you do get to catch (a few) tender words/moments before that happens + he seems genuinely amicable and friendly in conversation with others, so you know there's something more substantial beneath his fancy nobleness and spoiled behavior.

^^^ Also he sat comically slumped in this chair for like two minutes

I love Zizka 👏👏👏 literally has the best first impression I've seen from a character in a long time. Much like seeing the general from Akira for the first time, I could not help but to think, 'This dude's a real motherfucker, ain't he?" and that's great. Also I love his cinched waist silhouette and big silly mustache and also things about his character but who cares about that

Katherine was really good too. I didn't like her at first because idk feisty lady who says rude things is like the most cliche archetype for a female character in predominantly male casts, and that's how she came off at first. But I ended up enjoying her personality once it was able to breathe and move past that initial first impression.

- Tho I do think they kinda stopped knowing what to do with her once you leave Sigismund's camp?? Or maybe they just transitioned her to being worried and frustrated a lil too quickly??

- Anyway her dialogue was refreshing cuz she's like one of the few characters who ain't always praising jesus (I made a deliberate effort to never click the dialogue options that looked godly but I'd get jump scared by em every now and then and it would make my pp go soft)

- Thought it was funny that NPCs kept referring to her as "the woman with the black hair' even tho it's clearly brown

- I can definitely see the appeal of romancing her but regardless of me going into this knowing I'd be a Hans enjoyer, I actually legitimately like her & Henry's friendship as a platonic thing???

- The game really really wants you to be flirty with her (as the most emboobled person in the game) but I never clicked any of them since idk I feel like Henry wasn't that kinda dude in my playthrough, but there was a bit of dialogue that slips in no matter what when you check up on her for the first time after transitioning to the second region (and I think it implies there's a time skip??)

- It's v simple but it endeared me to their friendship immediately. Henry has a big smile on his face and is like, "How are you, my lovely?" and then she snickers and kind of teasingly responds like, "[idr what she said], love!" and something about that sarcastic-but-not-in-a-mean-way dynamic hooked me.

- Also, I want to see more men & women being able to have meaningful friendships without it having to be flirty and/or inevitably romantic

^^^ Bathes u platonically & in friendship

Ok so Rosa LOL I fucked up bad. I had 0 intent on romancing her but I wasn't gonna be like... explicitly rude or anything, but then I made The Wrong Choice in Malechov and she was PISSED at me forever. But TBH??? I think that actually gave us a fun and pretty interesting dynamic??

- Rosa is 100% fulfilling the traditional princess/knight fantasy (u even rescue her from a tower for goodness sake) which can let you live out your interesting & unique dreams of rescuing a princess, being chivalrous to her in a dank nasty tunnel, and then being rewarded with sex after you valiantly rid her wealthy property of the nasty poors

- BUT since I had no reason to maintain rep I decided to stick with my poor choice and, as I said, she never rly forgive me for letting Zizka suggest burning the tower, even when I said (truthfully) that it was only ever gonna be a ruse.

- So then we had a Shrek & Fiona (pre-montage) dynamic and that was great. Instead of me being gallant and offering to carry her through the flooded part of the tunnel, she sarcastically said that I had to do it and then Henry was like UGH and carries her very ungracefully. Then I got to call her out on all her BS about wanting me to slaughter all the beggars w/o even trying to sue for peaceful resolution, which she did concede on eventually.

- Anyway, Rosa and Henry were almost constantly butting heads and it was pretty refreshing. She was Big Mad™ and I was Didn't Care™ and it lent itself to a different kind of friendship dynamic. Just taking turns being absolute brats to each other

- I still think the pacing for her is weird, especially as one of the three main romance ppl, you get like barely any time with her or her father. If the game was 15% longer they could have developed their role in the story more which would've made their relationship feel less transactional

The Devil pack was fun, especially Kubyenka & Janosh. Dry Devil himself was pretty rough at first (bro, clear ur THROAT) but boy did they use him effectively when they needed to. The lead up to Malechov was the first time you really get to see how he got his name, and it worked

Was meh about Godwin at first (he also felt pretty archetypal) but he really grew on me too. More than any other character, Godwin made me wish I played the first game before jumping into this one so that I could have understood his character better from the start

^^^ Apparently he's not meant to be shirtless in this scene??? I didn't think anything of it until I saw other ppl's screenshots LOL

THIS IS TOO LONG LET'S GET TO THE GAY ALREADY (quote by me as I was nearing my 150th hour and still going [not rly tho u kno i was savoring this moment)

It was really goddamn good. I legit don't think I have seen a better payoff for such a meticulous slow burn between two people who got to build a friendship without any expectations for it to become something more.

SMALL TANGENT but I feel like it's so goddamn rare to see a m/m relationship that gets to blossom from a friendship genuinely and in its own time. I also like??? That they are the same age and as equally capable as one another?? IDFK WHAT HOLLYWOOD'S DEAL IS that if there's a gay romance they cannot help but to find ways to still make it as hetero as possible. There's always the gendered dynamic of the more masculine/feminine one; if not that, then there's an UNCOMFORTABLE age difference???? Two beautiful men can both be muscular and in love and attend lunch during the same time period as kids, it is indeed possible

ANYWAY The best part was that if you had asked me what I thought the scene was gonna be like, even as I progressed more and more through the story, I would not have expected this

I think maybe cuz I'm used to being let down I had tempered my expectations to only hope for the minimum

Like an exchange of dialogue; something topical & something flirty, then a kiss that would lead to weightless rolling around on the bed w/ romantic music (Mass Effect style)

But oh my goodness??

The way it was framed by the story of the two knights leading to an indirect confession from Hans, which eventually leads to a (Kiss Him) prompt, was all nice but pretty par for the course so far.

I had assumed Henry would be the one to confess since you were (from his perspective) the one gently leading their relationship toward something more, but was like "Oh ok, Hans confessed first (mostly) so now at least we know it's mutual. Then Henry will get to initiate the first kiss. /is very smart and perceptive"

Even Hans kissing Henry wasn't too out of left field, but then Henry pushes him away?? And has such a nasty scowl on his face??

So many unspoken things are conveyed by Hans here. I cannot add anything that has not already been said, but even just the body language and the way he delivers his lines is so... devastated and scared. Like he fucked up real bad, and Henry didn't do anything to assure him otherwise, which lead to even more ]: from him

I liked that Henry was about to leave and that he was going to do it with that scowl still on his face, but then ofc he turns around instead and make this one of the the most heartbreaking & then suddenly tender expressions of love I'd ever seen.

I'm glad their romance checks weren't flirty. You can tell that they were already in love each other but had each been holding it back for any number of good reasons, until suddenly those reasons didn't matter anymore

- Also wtf the little smile Hans does as Henry lowers him to the bed was so sweet

^^^ mfw my #bestbud kisses me before heading off to battle while I hold down the fort and as we fight for another day we both think about that poem of the knights who loved each other so much that they succumbed to grief & sorrow when they thought the other dead

Imagine seeing this scene and accusing it of being woke pandering. Imagine hearing the way every word is said by both characters and thinking it came out of nowhere & was done to appease DEI (which, ok first of all, LOL). Imagine closing yourself off from getting to witness something that is so unique to these two characters specifically. Life is so boring for u lmao

ANYWAY the scene was sublime and had this been it, I would have been more than happy with what we got. But I was genuinely surprised by how much it got referenced by Hans & Henry, but subtly by other characters, too.

I feel like romances in RPGs are typically contained to the scene where they consummate it, which is why you gotta savor it so much

But this one got to breach containment and came up in nice little ways, and at some point, much bigger and more deliberate ones.

Something I forgot to list in the Disappointments section that's 2 miles up this post, was I thought the wedding being revealed to Henry would be a bigger scene?? But then Rosa just casually mentions it, and so do other NPCs, and Henry also kinda is just whatever about it.

I wasn't even assuming it would be a scene because of the romance, but more because it was such a BIG DEAL as it was announced to Hans so I assumed it would be worth mentioning to Henry more explicitly, but it wasn't

But then it is! They talk about it late and what they (as two bros in love) are gonna do about it, and like?? Their future actually seems... not completely doomed? Which is amazing.

Not sure if they're gonna make a 3rd game or if the wedding will be a DLC, but I am much more confident now that Hans/Henry will can beyond its relevant scenes. Will be interesting to see how they handle it (seeing the wedding was pretty heavily foreshadowed) but I still feel like, even without romancing him, there's still something there to build off of.

in short: KCD2 was good and now I'm gonna draw boys kissing because it has also inspired me to get back into art LMAO