#methadon
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Me and the devil
#depressiv#sterben#borderline personality disorder#borderline#tod#ich kann nicht mehr#ptbs#deprimirend#tot#suizigedanken#benzodiazepines#benzodiazeplease#benzodiazepine#benzo#opiate#opiat#opiat addiction#opium#opiaddict#suchtkrank#suchtdruck#ich will sterben#suizidal#Methadon#oxycodone 80 mg#heroin
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Obsessed with the Something Is Wrong With House chain of command. A duckling goes to Wilson, who previously noticed but didn’t dig into it, who goes to Cuddy and either accuses her of something or tells her something is wrong. Cuddy disregards this until she sees a different kind of proof and then goes back to Wilson. Another one of House’s team notices independently of the other one. Cuddy and Wilson confront House. The fellows get on his case in a way different to Cuddy and/or Wilson. Nothing gets solved.
It’s not even a direct line it’s a goddamn tree
#house md#this is specifically about the methadone episode but also the house sleeps with Stacy episode and several more
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day 6 of withdrawals. every night I wake up at 4am with my skin cold and my bones burning. All most every nightmare is centred around me realising I’m never doing opiates/drugs ever again…ever
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#drugdeath#black#orph#christopher showreel#dark#heroina#opiaty#black metal#darkness#dsbm#heroin#methadone#opiates#opioids#selfharm#depressive#depresja#rany#rany cięte
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Methadone From a Healthcare Provider Standpoint
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Fantastic interview that goes over the medical and legal aspects of the lifesaving and harm-reducing drug methadone. Highly recommend you watch if you are at all interested in addiction medicine or just curious as to how the methadone system works!
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There are so many problematic things in House, it's literally a big part of the show. Most of it doesn't bother me, but one thing that does make me annoyed every time it's brought up is how they treat Methadone when House takes it. Don't get me wrong, taking Methadone is not ideal, but they treat it like it's some insane trial drug that's an automatic death sentence. Maybe it wasn't the best option for House, I can't say either way. But Methadone is a part of harm reduction. Methadone saves lives!! Not everybody struggling with addiction is able to jump straight from actively using to getting completely sober. There is no shame in utilizing harm reduction tools. There is so much stigma around harm reduction in general, and it's just disheartening to see it portrayed so negatively in the media.
#As someone who works in the medical field and hopes to eventually become a doctor#It is so important that we change the stigma around harm reduction and stop making people feel ashamed of seeking it out#It genuinely does save lives#I know the show is satire so it's not just about this show it's about the fact that 99% of shows portray it this way#house md#house#housemd#greg house#gregory house#harm reduction#addiction#methadone
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SEASON 5 OF HOUSE IS SO FUCKING CRAZY
#ppl keep telling me theyre watching it now bc i wont shut up abt it and i cannot put into words how ECSTATIC that makes me#but im wondering if i shld tag spoilers now#ngl it’s such a good show even if you know things abt it it’ll still hit u#but i certainly wld rather be surprised#anyway. spoilers. season 5. the hostage situation. house handing the gun back. him nearly dying bc he’s taking methadone on top of the#vicodin. him throwing away his cane bc he’s not in pain for once. quitting the methadone bc he made one (1) mistake and can’t forgive#himself bc he has to be medically right or he has nothing.#also thirteen and foreman. im so bisexual.#cuddy and her baby. cuddy firing house for the methadone then seeing how much it helps him and offering the job back. her wanting him to#take it but house refusing#wilson and house. as always.#shoutout to kutner also. my beloved.#OUVGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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I feel I'm not especially mean to Irish-Americans by the standards of my fellow Irish malcontents. If anything, I'm usually the one person being booed at for saying, hey, a lot of them are the descendants of people who had to flee famine and poverty and leave their entire family behind and never see them again, be nice. Also, Irish-American culture exists in its own right and they don't need our permission to identify with being Irish or to have an Irish culture that's diverged from ours.
HOWEVER, I am having my period and I just yesterday saw someone refer to Hozier as a tall fey prince from the woods of Ireland, and I'm in no mood for some yank making jokes about how he's so Irish for hating the Brits when he doesn't even know we spell favourite with a u too.
#incidentally#as someone who lives very local to where hozier's from I can't overstate how absurd the fairytale bullshit people spew about him is#like?? we have two lidls and multiple pharmacies that dispense methadone#things don't have to be a fucking tweedily eidily fantasy for your consumption#it's so patronising
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12/31/2011 5:57pm Saturday
Beginning of a new year’s journal. Andrew’s Hotel. SF CA
MAC showers.
The mood is different than last week. Arm bands required. Don’t drive. No guests. No room partys..
Hard to find a place to eat.
I’m a bit beat up—He’s been a bit grumpy.
But, we’re here. Not drinking. Away from Modesto.I got the letter yesterday from”my neighbor” who said that our car port is “a disgrace”.
I talked with Linda, Jeff and the guy who moved into Alvin’s house.
They all said “what’s he gonna do?”
“Alvin” said “You’ve been working on your house”.
Jeff said “must have been someone from your side” (of the court we lived on)
All supportive.
__________________-
MAC’s shower ends—should perk him up. He missed his dosing today.
Hotel man trys to find us a place to eat. Really helpful. Friendly. So is Mary, his fellow desk person. So, the City New Years Eve. Clean and clear.
End of entry
Margin note to the above entry December 31, 2013 Tuesday 8:50pm
Now it (the car port) is graced by a pink chandelier
Time Square Live is on the computer in the computer room. MAC TV’s in the living room. 2 full calendar years clean have now passed.
End of entry
Notes: 9/28/2024
After my partner Jim died in November 2009, I decided to do some rearranging of the massive amount of things thatt we had collected through Nour lives. I’d movesd things ourt into the car port which was visible from the stern. The anonymous neighbor complaint eventually resulted in in a fine by the City. I assumed that the complaint was anti gay more than messy carport motivated. So, after the car port was cleaned my friend installed a pink very gay chandelier in the car port. Later, much later, I learned that the actual complainer was gay! But, the Chandelier glows on and my neighbor who has a view of it out of her living room window says that she loves it!
More tales from suburbia.
MAC lived with me off and on from August of 2010 to December of 2014. He has been homeless since 2018. I write about him now in then in my blog. He still says hi now and then.
I quit drinking 2/21/2011. New Years 2011-2012 was my first sober new Years in decades. I have been sober now over 13 years.
MAC was going to a clinic to take methadone . He missed his dosing to go on our new Year's trip.
Linda, Jeff and "Alvin" were my neighbors on the Court that MAC and I lived on .
#New Year's Eve 2011#The Andrews Hotel San Fransisco#sobriety#gay history#conflict in suburbia#methadone dosing
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Saturday was a day I will remember for ever!
In the morning I had to pee in a cup! And that’s just for a start! Then I got administered methadone for the first time. There were a bunch of other people waiting to get their dose and you could tell they were all addicts. For the first time ever, I was with other people who went through the same shit I’ve been through. Then a guy approached me; I noticed him before, his arms and legs were visibly marked from years of drug injections. At some point he left with other guys, and when he got back he was…different. He couldn’t walk straight and he had his belt in his hands, trying to put it back on his trousers.. I also felt something good about him. No idea what it was, like…his eyes were kind. So he approached me and we chatted a little, and of course we ended up talking about dope. He straight up asked if I wanted to go to a real party like he was junkie Jack Dawson!!! And I said yess! Because I’m a crazy bitch! So I ended up carrying an addict never seen before until that day, in my car, to his dealer so he could score some h for the 2 of us! And he did! That was also the first time I tried some street dope.
We found a quiet place, I parked the car and we walked down a little path through trees and bushes until we reached a little stream of water. It was so nice, a little piece of heaven! We sit there (he even gave me his T-shirt so I wouldn’t get dirty) and in that beautiful place near the water, we snorted a couple of lines and got high on heroin. As soon as we started chatting at the very beginning, I noticed he was into me. Sitting there, high as a kite I got my confirmation: he got closer and started to caress me on my legs, my arms and my cheeks…it was totally innocent so I let him, plus I was enjoying my journey, smoking a cigarette not very “focused” on my surroundings…anyways it was time to leave and we got back to my car. I was driving and talking about the time my bf found me passed out in the bathroom because I overdosed and he suddenly realised that I do IV! He said: “whaaaat!! And we waisted that dope when we could have shot it?! Noo way! How could you?!” I started laughing like crazy! Basically he misjudged my appearance, I was too well dressed, too well behaved, too well whatever the fuck he thought I was..for the needle. Pff! Btw since he’s crazy as fuck, he wanted to inject with me so he asked me to stop at the closest pharmacy to buy a couple of syringes. Well…since I’m crazy as fuck too, that’s exactly what we did. At that point I felt like I was in a movie! He was able to find everything we needed for the cooking session, and there we were again, looking for a place where we could do our private party! We found the spot, so I stopped the car. He started to cook the dope using the bottom half of a can of soda (I had no idea where it came from and I didn’t ask!). To my surprise the dope started to dissolve just with the water, no ascorbic acid was required!! What kind of heroin was that, I wonder…
With my head filled with questions I rose my eyes towards him and guess what? He was nodding, heavily! I was like: Hey!! Wake up! Do not drop it! He said everything was fine and to not be worried! In a few minutes the 2 shots were ready, he offered me his help, saying: “Hey if you need a hand just tell me ok?”. And stuff like that.. then we were both ready for our magic trip to Wonderland!! He took out his belt, and told me that it was a present for his eighteenth birthday! Go figure! At that point he turned his back on me, so I don’t know which vein he used for the shot, but I’m pretty sure it was in his groin. As for me, I was praying Junkie Jesus the Almighty to let me register without much troubles! And after struggling a little I did it! I asked the guy if he was alright and he whispered yes. And that was my first time doing a shot with someone. He kept showering me with compliments while touching my skin, then my leg… and a part of me wanted to stay in that car, high as fuck with him, totally at peace with the world…but instead I recollected myself and drove him to the bus station. We exchanged our numbers tho! I’m sure I will see him again…
Btw, my bf was mad as hell because I got home late and our plans for the day went to shit…I am indeed an horrible person.
#the first time#problematique’s adventures#a day to remember#quite a day#addiction#heroin girl#iv#the dope duchess#heroin#methadone#girls who shoot up#life is hard when you’re a junkie#junkie jesus#personal#pee in a cup#dope#crazy bitch#a quiet place#high as a kite#high on heroin#overdose#the needle and the damage done#syringe#paraphernalia#cooking session#driving around#life imitates art#jack dawson#titanic#nodding
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I grew up in Tennessee during the pill mill days, and all the prescription drug “overdoses” I knew about were methadone related. Overdoses is in quotes because it’s not a medical term, it’s just a term lazy doctors use in order to avoid determining the actual cause of death, like heart failure.
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9 p.m.
time to throw out the trash
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HIstory of the Opium Problem 1600- 1950
Germany, Your Hands Are Now Exposed, and We KNOW -
Just so you understand, the global drug problem was a PLAN.
HIstory of the Opium Problem 1600- 1950
READ This Short Book and Get Mad As Hell cause the F'n Sackler family is still all up in the plan, making it continue to claim lives. Please don't pass this one up if you are looking to understand how america and the rest of the world is constantly fighting something they claim they don't support; but continue to run as a whole ass industry. Ie;. rehab, clinics for testing, corrections, drug courts.
This plan was put into effect wayyyyy back in the early 1600's so learn who did it and what we should all know about why we are still being targeted 500+ years later,
HIstory of the Opium Problem 1600- 1950
Germany, Your Hands Are Now Exposed, and We KNOW -
#HIstory of the Opium Problem 1600- 1950#Just so you understand#the global drug problem was a PLAN.#Germany#opium#heroin#methadone#drug industry#crime#white lies
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