#men who can take orders Hehehehe

[awkward-tension-art]

Oh….oh no.

[fangirlanxiety74]

Please tell me about your IHNMAIMS headcanons!!! :3 I will eat them up

HEHEHEHE HIHIHI!!!

:3 multiple people asked me to talk about it and I talked about it with people in DMs too so here's the post for group discussion where I tag you all @average-hyperfixator @paig-does-it @infectiousliterature @a-st3r hello!!

God where to begin?

I was mainly talking about Ellen last night. I like. For context, I have this huge ihnmaims doc just *filled* with headcanons, how I would rewrite their backstories and psychodramas and such. Things like that!!! I only have like. Ted filled out coherently at this point, but I've been thinking about the others too. Like Ellen!!!

I really want to write her in a light where she's not. That soft-spoken, sweet, submissive and cowardly person that she's like all across the franchise. Like, she is, but not until AM messed with her, yk???

The Ellen I imagine...

Grew up in a very loving and very supportive family. She definitely doesn't come from money, but she's not really well-off either. She's kind of in Ted's situation in terms of financially, maybe a bit worse.

But!! That doesn't stop her or her family. She was loved. She was taken care of. She was encouraged. And as such, she's a very confident, strong-willed, determined woman when she grows up. She loves to learn, loves to do whatever she can get her hands on; stem, psychology, anthropology, history, computer science, engineering, etc, etc. She just wants to know all she can!!!

And man, with that type of determination + love of learning, it gets her places. She's a high achiever, maybe a bit of a perfectionist and hard on herself, but she's done so many great things in her life, she's admirable!

The only issue is... While family and friends may support her. While she's still achieved so much. It leaves a bitter aftertaste knowing that...

Well, she's still a black woman. Yk?

And that means she has to limit herself. Keep her light dimmed. In order to really... get anywhere she wants. Even if she hates it. Because, society only sees her in that light and nothing more. No matter what she does, her race and gender will still hold her down. If that makes sense?

She's kind. She's caring. She's a good person. She always has been, but wouldn't you also be kind of snarky and passive-aggressive if people diminish the things you do, just because of what you are? Being constantly compared to a white woman, or even a white man, being asked when you'll finally settle and start your "true calling" (marriage and kids), etc?

I like to think she's witty and cunning and just so smart, and seldom few people want to accept it due to their racism and misogyny. And it's awful

And then... The world ends. It blows up. Now you're the only black woman left on Earth alive, surrounded by men, and a sentient AI strips you of all those things that made you *you*. Turns you into someone you don't recognize.

It was AM's doing. Her becoming that soft-spoken, motherly, cowardly woman. That's not who she is. That's AM forcing her to take on a more traditional role; a wife, a mother. An accessory to a man. Because what would be more humiliating than that, to a woman who was so much more?

She's trapped in a box she can't get out of. One with a sliding door, always reminding her of what she could be, but it's too far out of reach. Trying to grab it will risk in your arm getting chopped off, or worse. (Thank you to paige-does-it for this idea specifically <333)

But still

The door can open. And she can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

So she has hope. She keeps it, close to her chest, and tries to give others the same. That they can survive this. That things can be better than they are now.

Not necessarily because she believes it, but...

She'd go insane without it.

[octuscle]

Go to rack and ruin

At the prompting of @maletfwitch, here is a sequel to an older post.

The Abbas were glad to be rid of their unpleasant neighbor. Instead, they had a hardworking and faithful new employee. Unfortunately, the house in the neighborhood did not remain empty for long. And if the Abbas had believed that the old neighbor had been a scourge of God, this one was the apocalypse made flesh. The house was decorated with American flags and MAGA posters downright grotesque. At every prayer time, the neighbor played the American national anthem over outdoor speakers. Not only for the Muslim neighbors, for all neighbors in the immediate vicinity Mr. Carson was an absolute burden. Nevertheless, he had managed to organize a neighborhood watch and become the head of it himself. Needless to say, he preferred to position people in front of the Abbas' property and made no secret of the fact that they were the threat to security and order. Fortunately, the Abbas knew how to help themselves again this time.

When Mr. Carson awoke the next morning, he was not wearing freshly laundered pajamas. Instead, he was wearing a sweaty wifebeater and a pair of worn-out underpants that might have been white at some point. Bleary-eyed, he went to the refrigerator and grabbed a cold Bud light. Fuck, where had he put his chewing tobacco? The kitchen was a mess again. Peter Carson filled a garbage bag with beer bottles, the contents of various ashtrays, and the pizza boxes from the last few days. He went outside, tossed the garbage bag to the others in the front yard. The last ones had been tampered with by those darn rats or raccoons. Miserable vermin. Like the filthy terrorists next door. Still in his underwear, Peter raised the American flag, saluted, took a swig of beer and belched. Old Mrs. Price across the street turned away in disgust and pushed her walker a little faster.

Peter went back into the house. So slowly he had to get to work. His hardware store was opening soon. After a quick shower and a rather sloppy shave, Peter, in his lumberjack shirt, not-so-clean jeans and old work boots, left the house and got into his swank Mercedes. Did not really fit him and also not to his job. He could not even remember when and why he had bought this car. But it was a good car and it had been built by good people. Not by those dirty gooks. In his store, he also only sold things that were built in America. America first!

When he returned home after a long day at work, he cursed his old car. Yes, 30 years ago the Mercedes had certainly been a good car. But the repairs would have been expensive, now neither the air conditioning nor the right turn signal worked. The Teutonic steel was slowly turning into a rolling pile of scrap metal. Oh well, Pete thought to himself as he pulled into the cluttered driveway. Fits the house with the rotten porch and broken fly screens. Pete sat down on the porch with a not-very-cold beer from the decrepit refrigerator, picked up his air rifle and shot at the possums rummaging through his trash.

As they did every night, the police came. The stuffy neighbors would have complained about him again. Pete slurred that the cops should fuck off. The cops fucked off and took him to the drunk tank.

Fuck, if he was late for work again today, he'd lose his roustabout job at the sawmill, too. Just like he had already lost the house and his store. But he loved his life in the trailer park. All good American men here. Always someone around who had a cold beer or a can of chewing tobacco. Just the damn rats! Pete took his rifle and tried to take out some of the beasts. Hehehehe, four had to go down. A swig of beer on top of that. And then off to work in his German sweetheart, which he had tuned so impressively himself.

[queenofbaws]

hello my friends, and congrats on making it to yet another wednesday. oh how the time simply flies, huh?

a quick status update over here: things are still pretty nuts with family stuff, so as i said over the weekend, if you've sent me a flash fiction prompt i haven't gotten to yet, i promise i haven't forgotten! <3 most of my energy's been going elsewhere lately, what can you do.

my big goals for the near future are still (1) to finish the tale(s) of the champion, (2) to finish of mummy men & bathtub soup, and (3) to get another chapter of like wringing blood from a stone out, but i've learned my lesson and will not be making guesses as to timeframes there, hehehehe. if you're looking for a sneak peek or two to tide you over in the meantime, i'm including snippets from tales, wringing, and a SECRET MYSTERY PROJECT under the cut.

as always, hope you're hanging in there, and hope you're taking care of yourself as best you can, whatever that looks like for you <333

the tale(s) of the champion

“I’m not proud of my time in Kirkwall, Inquisitor,” Cullen said sharply, an answer to an accusation she hadn’t raised. “All I did then, I did to fulfill the duty expected of me, but even so there are things I said, things I did, things…” The muscles of his jaw clenched and unclenched over his working throat. “…things allowed to happen under my watch, which I regret so thoroughly as to know they will follow me well into my grave. But the actions I’ve taken against Hawke and her cohort—ordered or otherwise? No.” A brisk shake of his head. “Those I do not regret in the slightest.”

It was times like these, times where the tension crackled like ozone before a storm, that made her worry for the whole of the Inquisition. For Thedas, really. There she was, meant to be their benevolent leader, even-tempered and understanding, and instead of backing away with arms raised to allow the situation to defuse, she ground her boot that much harder into the softer bits offered up to her, hoping to wring out as much blood as she could before the wound scabbed over.

It was times like these that she worried the Chantry was right, that she’d never be accepted as the voice of the people, as a protector and guide; maybe she’d always be who she’d been before the Conclave…no matter how brightly her armor shone.

“You make her sound like a monster.”

Cullen scoffed. “A criminal.”

“Is there a difference?”

like wringing blood from a stone

A branch snapped behind him.

And something let out a deep, growling breath.

Bobby didn’t whip himself around. Everybody else could say and think what they wanted, but he wasn’t any fucking moron—you didn’t make sudden moves when you were being tracked. Hunted. He knew that same as he knew his own name.

What he did instead was jam as much of his weight as he could against the door, grimacing with effort when his shoulder made contact. Inside, he heard Mom scream.

“Don’t you let him in here, Jed!”

“No one’s gettin’ in.”

“DON’T YOU LET HIM IN THIS GODDAMN HO—”

He didn’t wait to hear her finish the sentence. Nah, he hauled back and kicked the door with every ounce of force he could muster. But even though he did it the same way he’d seen Uncle Jack do a million times before, it didn’t budge.

Mom just screamed again.

The sound made his skin stand up, not like goosebumps or shivers, more like the hot, stinging welts you got from snapping a rubber band or touching poison oak. It was a sickish feeling, making his palms sweat and his vision double. He didn’t know if he wanted to puke, scream, dig his fingers into his own skin…or maybe just curl up there on the porch and cry until he couldn’t anymore. In the end, he split the difference.

SUPER SECRET MYSTERY PROJECT WOOoOoOoOoOO

Her breath hitched as she saw a sliver of moonlight ahead. Emily pushed away the horrible, impossible, image of Beth’s rotting face and surged forward the last few meters to the doors. She slid between them before slamming them shut, her hands chapping in the cold even as she yanked the latching bar down into place. The doors rocked under her palms, and the thing she’d locked inside shrieked in fury as obvious as it was alien. She could feel it beat against the doors with fists the size of her head, felt it fight to get to her, but no matter how the doors shook on their hinges, the latch held.

Her body slumped as her exhaustion caught up with her. A breath tore out of her in a shaking, ragged sob…or maybe it was a laugh. From where she stood, it was impossible to tell.

And then something grabbed her.

Too tired to fight, too tired to run, too tired to do so much as gasp in surprise, Emily found herself yanked away from the doors and around a bend, her point of view torn suddenly from the mine’s processing facility to the trees. That wasn’t the most worrying part, though.

That was the hand.

It came to her in pieces-parts, her panic growing with each revelation. First was the hand on her face, clutching her so tightly it hurt; it covered her mouth, it squished her nose, leaving her only one nostril to breathe from—not nearly enough for her to catch her breath. There was another hand too, its heel pressed hard to the spot below her ribs where her stomach began, the fingers gripping so hard she could feel them through her jacket. Her leather jacket. And the body…the body she registered last, solid and sinewy and pressed flush to her back. She could feel the rise and fall of the chest at her shoulder blades. There was hot breath displacing her hair.

When finally her brain put it all together, her hands snapped up to beat at the one covering her face, pulling and scratching—anything to get even a little more air into her lungs.  

It was the wrong thing to do. The hand only gripped her harder, tightening until the soft, fleshy insides of her cheeks ground into her teeth.

[faterpresources]

√Lᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ -　Lᴀsᴛ Aɴsᴡᴇʀ Sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ Sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇʀs

A collection of random lines compiled from the game √Letter -　Last Answer Feel free to change the pronouns in order to better suit the parts involved. Warning: some crude language

❝ Yes, I'm Bitch. ❞

❝ I found you, Bitch. ❞

❝ Don't get the wrong idea. ❞

❝ Women are always realistic. ❞

❝ Eh, old folks like shrines. ❞

❝ Please watch out for ghosts. ❞

❝ Why should I give any money? ❞

❝ There are monsters there too? ❞

❝ Anybody who is a hero to you? ❞

❝ Aren't you going to protect me? ❞

❝ What a beeYOOtiful moon tonight! ❞

❝ Can't say I need a cat right now. ❞

❝ Gramps, don't say crap like that. ❞

❝ You were cute, and that's a fact! ❞

❝ This is where my life is at now... ❞

❝ We were just friends, nothing more. ❞

❝ If it is true, I won't forgive you. ❞

❝ How creepy, a letter from the dead! ❞

❝ Sir/Ma'am, your penpal was a ghost. ❞

❝ I've still got some life in me, boy. ❞

❝ I just came to look for an old friend. ❞

❝ Bitch?! Are you calling me a bitch?! ❞

❝ Nothing like sweets when you're tired.❞

❝ Then, would you admit to being Bitch? ❞

❝ I have nothing to say to you. GET OUT! ❞

❝ He was not a hero. More like a villain. ❞

❝ I was filled with doubt and I got scared. ❞

❝ Nope. Looks like we're getting UFOs now. ❞

❝ She was a special someone to me as well. ❞

❝ Do you have any friends who you can trust? ❞

❝ This painting is overflowing with sadness. ❞

❝ Men are always foolish. Heheh... Heheheh...❞

❝ I feel like he's making fun of me somehow. ❞

❝ You could stand to dress snappy, it's true. ❞

❝ Though I guess you could still be possessed. ❞

❝ I figured out the days when the ghost appears! ❞

❝ Are you sure you want to talk to me like that? ❞

❝ What kind of adult do you want to become, ___ ? ❞

❝ If anyone tries to pick a fight, I'll bite them! ❞

❝ You're getting me upset, but I need to calm down. ❞

❝ Don't worry, there aren't any ghosts or anything. ❞

❝ Forget your lunch, but don't forget your umbrella. ❞

❝ Don't be embarrassed. You could find your soulmate. ❞

❝ Take this talisman with you to ward off evil spirits. ❞

❝ Don't go blathering about it, but I was with the FBI. ❞

❝ Your story's messed up. So what, I'm the bad guy now? ❞

❝ Meeting someone because of the rain is kinda romantic. ❞

❝ Am I really going to be that popular with the ladies?! ❞

❝ The rain brought us together; maybe we're meant to be. ❞

❝ If you're looking for ghost, you've got to go at night. ❞

❝ What are you talking about? You're as beautiful as ever. ❞

❝ Ghosts, UFOs, legends, and now monsters. Give me a break. ❞

❝ I wanted you to say I had charisma, even if it was a lie. ❞

❝ This place is more for, you know, romantic fortunetelling. ❞

❝ Please don't say I'll be kidnapped by aliens or something. ❞

❝ There is no way that savage woman could have been popular. ❞

❝ Does this city just have a lot of hot people running around?!❞

❝ Locals never leave the house without an umbrella, I take it? ❞

❝ You know, in horror movies whoever says that gets killed first.❞

❝ She was the best friend you all had, but you hurt her the most. ❞

❝ Hey, please don't insult my Sherlock Holmesian detective skills. ❞

❝ He looks like he plays around, but he's actually had a tough life. ❞

❝ But why was she so upset? I can never tell what women are thinking... ❞

❝ If that were it, it would've been a happy ending. But reality is cruel. ❞

❝ I picked this place because it was cheap, so I can't complain too much. ❞

❝ Cats are a little tricky to deal with. They're not like dogs, you know. ❞

❝ You should keep it with you. You never know when something might happen. ❞

❝ How many years has it been since I last looked out at the city like this? ❞

❝ It's creepy. I feel like Dracula could pop out of the shadows at any moment. ❞

❝ Luckily this is happening in real life, so I don't have to worry about ghosts. ❞

❝ I've been around a bit longer than you. Of course I know a thing or two. Hahaha.❞

❝ As you go on in life, you sometimes hurt people. But sometimes you save people too. ❞

❝ You've shouldered a burden you didn't have to. But that's fate. You can't oppose it. ❞

❝ I don't need your sarcasm. Are you done? I have better thangs to do than talk to you. ❞

❝ Life is a tour boat. Don't rush; you'll enjoy it more if you relax and enjoy the ride. ❞

❝ One step in the wrong direction could land you in the worst of circumstances. ❞

❝ It's exciting, like we're pulling a prank on everyone. Like pop stars on a secret date.  ❞

❝ This looks delicious. Time to forget about mystery-solving for a while and enjoy the meal. ❞

❝ I don't know what you're talking about. What's there to be embarrassed about? I'm a genius. ❞

❝ Only work for me. I'm not a woman made for love. My family might not be suited for marriage. ❞

❝ Meeting someone because of rain is called Enishizuku. It means something like "destiny drops". ❞

❝ I've done nothing illegal here. All of these pictures were legally taken, or legally acquired. ❞

❝ Just thinking about something won't let others know what it is. Please turn your thoughts into words too.❞

❝ I gather horror stories, strange tales, and urban legends, and retell them with no fee, no discretion, and no permission. ❞

❝ Secrets are like burdens. The longer you hold on to them, the heavier they get. You want to tell someone and lighten the load.❞

[cobaltusami]

Superhiro

bleh! Finally It's finished! This took so fricking long to write- But It was a lot of fun. It reminded me of when I was a kid and would play heroes and villains with my friends. I could have fleshed out the ending t word scenes more but I was afraid It would be too long because I could literally go on forever. Besides, I think there's going to be more installments to this with more focus on a single villain instead of multiple ones. That's my plan anyway!

Word count: 4467

Characters: Ler!Hiro, Switch!Chihiro, Lee!Leon, Switch!Taka(briefly), Lee!Mondo(briefly), Lee!Makoto(briefly), Ler!Hina(briefly), Ler!Sayaka(briefly), Sakura, Celeste, Byakuya

The air In the school was heavier today than usual, and the atmosphere was filled with negative energy. Everyone seemed to be affected by It, being less cheerful and more agitated than usual.

Even people like Makoto weren’t impervious to it’s lingering effects. Apparently he and Byakuya had gotten into an argument in the dining hall in front of the other students.

Hiro hadn’t witnessed any of It, having slept In this morning. He was just on his way to join his classmates when he spotted Chihiro exiting the hall. He waved to them but they seemingly didn’t notice. “Hey Chihiro!” He greeted cheerfully in spite of the looming negativity.

That’s when he noticed It.

Chihiro looked up at him with tears in their eyes, stuttering and trying to greet him back. They gave up on their failed attempt after a moment.

“Chi? What’s wrong buddy?” He asked, concerned as he approached the smaller student.

Chihiro shook their head and went running past him, most likely to the solitude of their room.

Hiro was about to go after them but heard yelling coming from the dining hall, he sighed. So that’s why Chihiro was so upset. He took a calming breath and entered the room.

“You fuckin dumbasses! Will you stop fighting!? You scared Chihiro!” Mondo yelled at the two students in question.

“It’s not my fault! He started it!” Makoto pointed a finger accusingly at the affluent progeny.

Byakuya opened his mouth to say something but Taka interjected first. “I don’t care who started the yelling, I am giving you both an order to STOP YELLING!” He snapped.

“Jeez, The hell did I just walk In on?” Hiro muttered under his breath, still going unnoticed by his classmates. He lingered In the doorway for another moment before deciding to turn around and go after Chihiro.

“Chihiro? You In there?” He asked through the door after not getting a response from ringing the doorbell. “It’s me, Hiro.”

There was some shuffling from inside the room for a moment before silence, As if they were hesitating on whether to let him in or not.

“If you don’t wanna open the door, I’ll just sit here and wait until you’re ready.” He said reassuringly, Leaning against the wall next to the door.

Leon approached the Clairvoyant, coming from the direction of the dining hall. He nodded a greeting to the taller student and knocked on the door in a short random tune. “Yo, Chi. It’s Leon. I’m here too.” He announced.

Hiro smiled at the red head and sat down on the floor, Leon followed his lead and sat on the other side of the door. “Mondo was gonna come check on you too, But he didn’t wanna scare you because he’s pretty mad right now.” The Aspiring rockstar said.

“What were those two fighting about anyways?” Hiro asked.

Leon sighed and rolled his eyes. “Stupid shit. Byakuya’s being…”

“Byakuya?”

“I was gonna say a total dick, But yeah.” Leon snickered. “Anyway, He was being a dick and came in insulting us. Mondo started to get mad but Makoto’s the one who got In his face. And Chi tried to diffuse the situation but Byakuya…”

“Lemme guess, He said something really mean didn’t he?”

“Yeah.” Leon replied with a soft sigh.

The door unlocked and slowly opened, revealing a shaking and tearful Chihiro. “H-He said… No o-one asked me, a-and n-no one wanted m-me there. He-He said… He...” They shook their head and backed up into the room, leaving the door open for the two students.

Hiro was the first to spring up and go Inside the room, pulling the programmer Into a hug. Leon was only a few seconds behind him. He closed the door as he entered the room, hearing the yelling picking back up in the dining hall.

He sat down on the foot of the bed quietly, trying not to outwardly show how angry he was for how his friend was treated.

“It’s okay Chi…” Hiro said softly to the crying student.

After a few minutes they pulled back from Hiro, wiping their eyes with their sleeves. “He said… That no one likes m-me...” they choked out.

“Hey! That’s not true! Since when did Byakuya have a good take on anything?” Hiro retorted, picking the programmer up and setting them on the bed next to Leon. “We all love you!”

Chihiro sniffled, Looking up at Hiro with hopeful eyes. “R-Really?”

Hiro crouched down so he was at eye level with them. “Really!” he smiled, ruffling their hair.

“Yeah, That prick doesn’t speak for us! You should know that by now.” Leon added.

Chihiro wiped their face with their sleeves again, tears still leaking down their cheeks.

“That doesn’t mean It doesn’t still hurt to hear things like that.” Hiro interjected. “It’s okay to be sad.”

“Right.”

Chihiro nodded wordlessly.

Hiro looked at Leon silently, trying to come up with a way to cheer the programmer up. The rockstar offered a small shrug as a response.

He racked his brain for a minute before coming up with an idea, He grinned and stood back up to full height. “I got It!”

Chihiro jumped at the sudden exclamation. “W-What?”

The eldest student grabbed the sleeves of the jacket draped over his shoulders and tied them in a knot around his neck, mimicking a superhero’s cape. “I think It’s about time I revealed my secret identity to you!”

Chihiro and Leon exchanged confused looks. “W-What Is he talking about?”

“You’re asking me as If I know?” Leon retorted.

“Well, My name Is still Hiro… But I’m actually a superhero! Ooh! Superhiro If you will!” Hiro grinned, making a superhero pose.

“Oh booooo! That was horrible man!”

Chihiro, to both the mens surprise, giggled at this. “W-What’s your power?”

“I sense when people are feeling down. My superpower Is…” Hiro suddenly scooped up the programmer, cradling them in his arms. “Cheer up tickles!”

He lightly began tickling Chihiro’s sides and belly, causing them to squeal and erupt into bright giggles. “Hehehehe! Hiro! stooop!” they giggled, playfully pushing at his hand.

“Sorry buddy, No can do! I can’t stop until you’ve been effectively cheered up.��� Hiro grinned, pinching at their side.

Chihiro’s giggles soon turned into happy laughter as they squirmed.

“Squirm all you want, You can’t escape!” Hiro sang teasingly, spidering his fingers along their ribs. “Another power of mine Is keeping sad friends trapped while I tickle them happy again!”

They laughed harder and gently pushed at his hand. “Okahahahay! H-Hiro plehehehease! I’m hahahappy!”

“Are you sure? Because Superhiro doesn’t like being lied to.” He chuckled.

“I-Ihihihihi’m sure!” they tittered.

“Alright,” He paused, withdrawing his hand. “One more thing though!”

“W-What?”

Hiro readjusted his hold on the still slightly giggling programmer, now holding them bridal style instead of holding them with one arm. He lifted them higher into the air closer to his face, and blew a long raspberry against their belly.

They shrieked and pushed at Hiro’s head, dissolving into fits of loud laughter in his grip.

After blowing a second one, he relented, laying Chihiro down on their bed as they recovered from their fit. “You feel better now kiddo?” He smiled as he untied his jacket sleeves.

Chihiro nodded, still giggling breathlessly. “Yehes… Thank you H-Hiro…”

As Hiro held his jacket In his hands, about to drape it back over his shoulders, an idea struck him. Maybe there was a way to help with the negativity problem…

“I have an idea.” He hummed, throwing the article of clothing over one shoulder as he knelt down on the floor. He leaned against the foot of the bed facing the other two students. “I think I might be able to fix everyone’s bad moods.”

“R-Really? How?” Chihiro asked, their face lighting up as they sat up.

“Don’t tell me…” Leon sighed. Already seeing where this was going.

“Maybe Superhiro should go pay the grumpy students a visit.” he winked, confirming Leon’s suspicions.

Chihiro giggled. “I think so too!”

“I’m not sure that’s gonna work, I mean, There’s no changing Byakuya’s mood from what I’ve seen.” Leon mumbled.

“You know,” Hiro started, seemingly ignoring Leon’s reasoning. “I’m gonna need a sidekick If I’m gonna take down all these evildoers…”

“H-Hey! Are you even listening to me??”

The answer Is no. Not that anyone should be shocked that Hiro isn’t listening to reason.

“What do you say, Chi? Wanna help me get the negative meanies?” He asked.

Chihiro’s eyes widened with excitement, a big smile overtaking their features. “S-Sure!” they beamed.

Leon sighed, throwing his hands up as he was continuously ignored. “Why do I even bother?”

Chihiro bounced up off the bed excitedly and retrieved another sweater from their closet, draping It over their shoulders and tying it at the sleeves just as Hiro had earlier. “I’m ready!”

Hiro laughed at the unusual behavior from the normally meek programmer. “Now you need a super name…”

“Hmm… How about The Decoder?”

“If that’s what you want, that’s fine with me!” He smiled.

Chihiro nodded, giggling happily as Hiro stood and tied his jacket into a cape again. “Well then, Decoder! For our first assignment…”

Hiro spun around on his heels, facing Leon now. “We must defeat the Red Rocker!” He declared, mimicking a superhero voice.

“Th-The Red Rocker?” Leon parroted, feeling a wave of happiness flood him at being recognized as a rockstar. Though that was short lived once what he said sank In. “W-Wait! Nonononono!”

Leon shot up and went running for the door but Hiro was right after him, hooking his arms around his waist and carrying him back over to the bed with ease. “Not so fast, Evil doer!”

“Hiro! I swear to god, If youhuhuhuhuhu-- Hahahahahaha!” Leon burst out laughing as he felt Hiro’s hands descend upon his sides.

“Okay Decoder, Help me vanquish this evil doer!” He grinned. “Through my super vision, I can tell his feet are pretty ticklish.”

“Dohohohon’t you dahahahare!” Leon laughed, struggling in his grasp. “I wihihill burn your cohohohomic collection you neheheherd!”

“No you won’t.” Hiro laughed, squeezing his hips.

Leon shrieked, throwing his head back laughing. “SHIHIHIHIHIT! HIHIHIRO STAHAHAP!”

“Hey, That’s Superhiro to you, Villain!” Hiro grinned, massaging his thumbs in circles against the dips of his hips.

Chihiro pulled off his shoes and socks and started lightly wiggling their fingers all over his right foot. “Yeah, Don’t disrespect Superhiro!” they giggled.

Leon tried to kick Chihiro’s hands away, but couldn’t thanks to Hiro sitting on his legs. All he could do was wiggle his feet in vain and laugh. “HEHEHE HIRO! CH-CHIHI! NOT THEHEHEHERE!”

Between his feet and his hips he couldn’t decide which spot was worse for him.

Hiro snickered, speeding up. “We’ll only stop If you give up being a criminal and come to our side!”

“WHAHAHAHAT THE HEHEHEHELL ARE YOU TAHAHAHALKING ABOUT!?”

“I think what he means Is, Help us and we’ll let you go…” Chihiro explained.

“THEHEHERE’S NO WAHAHAY IN HEHEHELL I’M HELPING YOU!” Leon laughed, sending the best glare he could to Hiro.

‘Superhiro’ smirked and rolled his eyes, reaching back with one hand and targeting his left foot, specifically his arch, a spot he knew would make the redhead convulse with unapologetically loud laughter. “You sure about that?”

Leon screeched, his body jolting sharply at the sensation. “FUHUHUHUHAHAHAHAHACK!” He swore, trying to wiggle his foot away from Hiro’s skilled fingers.

Chihiro took notice of the reaction and mimicked what Hiro was doing, making Leon’s laughter turn silent.

“Are you going to give In now, Red Rocker?” Chihiro smiled, their question was met with frantic nods from the baseball star.

“Are you suuuuuure?” Hiro teased, Still torturing the poor redhead.

“IHIHIHIM SUHUHUHURE!” He choked out, tears welling up in his eyes from laughing too hard.

Hiro relented and signaled for Chihiro to stop as well. Chihiro giggled and stood up. “Who’s our next target, Superhiro?”

Hiro stood up too, humming thoughtfully as he considered their options. “Got any Ideas, Red Rocker?” He asked with a playful smile.

“Oh, I have a few ideas alright…” Leon panted, glaring tiredly at the older man.

“Watch It… Unless you wanna go for round two.” He wiggled his fingers threateningly at the rockstar who flinched and hugged his knees to his chest as he sat up.

“U-Uh… Makoto?” Leon suggested, shrugging his shoulders a bit.

Hiro looked at Chihiro, whose eyes seemed to light up at the mention. “Alright, The Lucky Charm It Is.”

“Th-The lucky charm…?”

“Duh, Everyone has a super name.” Hiro snickered, handing Leon his shoes and socks back. “C’mon Red Rocker, pull yourself together.”

After that, they headed back to the dining hall to retrieve Makoto, but he was nowhere to be found. It looks like the altercation had broken itself up and most of the students had left the hall.

“LifeGuard! Where did The Lucky Charm go?”

“What are you three doing?” Celeste asked, confused.

“Who needs a lifeguard?? And why??” Aoi asked.

“They’re playing super hero.” Leon explained. “He’s talking about Makoto.”

“I’m assuming he’s referring to Hina when he says LifeGuard?” Sakura asked, to which Hiro nodded.

“Ooh! I want a super name!” Sayaka giggled excitedly.

“Hmm… How about… The Platinum Siren?”

“Oooh! I like It!”

“Um… right.” Hina smiled in exasperation, rubbing the back of her head. “Anyway, Makoto went back to his room so try checking there?”

“Thank you, LifeGuard!” Hiro said In a superhero voice. “Come, Decoder and Red Rocker. Let us go apprehend the criminal!”

He turned and left the room, Chihiro following closely behind, Leon sighed and hesitated. Why did he get involved in this silly game again?

He followed not so enthusiastically behind the two joyous students as they hurried down the hall, their jackets flying behind them like actual capes from how fast they were running.

Chihiro rang the doorbell while Hiro and Leon hid on either side of the door against the wall so that Makoto wouldn’t immediately spot them.

After a few minutes Makoto opened the door. “Chihiro, Hey… Are you okay?”

“Mhm. I’m doing much better now.” They smiled up at the lucky student.

“Good… I’m sorry about earlier, Byakuya was way out of line with what he-- ACK! H-Hey!” He yelped in surprise as Hiro suddenly came into view and scooped him up, carrying him inside his own room and dropping him on the bed as the other two followed and closed the door behind them. “What the hell!?”

“Evil doer, Your fight earlier with Byakuya upset The Decoder so I’m here to help them exact revenge!”

Makoto blinked, absolutely lost as to what was going on. His eyes flickered to Leon, who seemed uninterested. “What is he going on about now?”

“They’re playing a game.” Leon explained in a deadpan manner. “They’re superheroes and you and Byakuya are the villains.”

“Oh.” Makoto couldn’t help but smile a little at how happy Chihiro seemed, It seemed like they both were having a lot of fun… Who was he to ruin it for them? “Well, Foolish heroes. I won’t be thwarted by the likes of both of you!”

Makoto leapt off the bed and made a break for the door.

“He’s getting away Superhiro!” Chihiro gasped.

“Stop him, Red Rocker!”

“Why do I gotta do It?”

“The Red Rocker Is no match for me!” Makoto grinned, grabbing Leon as he sprinted out the door. “In fact, I’ll take him with me!”

He gave his best evil laugh as he pulled the door shut and went running with Leon down the hall.

He pulled Leon Into the Gym with him and doubled over to catch his breath. “Man, I need to start working out…” He wheezed.

Leon leaned against the wall, also catching his breath. “Y-Yeah, I’m not really used to running anymore either.”

“It’s really nice of you to play along with them.” Makoto smiled, standing up straight again.

“Y-Yeah well… I didn’t have much choice. They kind of forced me Into It.” Leon blushed, recalling how he got into this mess to begin with. “It was nice of you to go along with it without being coerced.”

“I can tell they’re having fun, I didn’t wanna ruin it.” He replied. “So, let me get things straight… You’re the Red Rocker, He’s Superhiro, Chihiro Is The Decoder… Who am I?”

“Hiro called you The Lucky Charm, I think he was thinking of cereal.” Leon chuckled.

“The… Lucky charm? Ehh, Not exactly the worst name I’ve heard…” Makoto smiled and shook his head. “Is anyone else playing along villain wise?”

“Nope. Me, You and Byakuya were the only villains. Apparently Hina and Sayaka are heroes.”

Makoto smiled mischievously. “Let’s go recruit some baddies then, Red Rocker.”

“Aye Aye, Captain.” Leon smirked in response.

The two set out on their sneaky mission to rope their friends into the silly game, they managed to avoid Chihiro and Hiro quite easily, surprisingly to the both of them.

“You want me to do what?” Mondo asked, blinking in utter confusion.

“Join in on our game as a villain.” Makoto repeated.

“Why the fuck would I do that?”

“For Chihiro.” Leon replied. “Hiro started this goofy superhero game to cheer them up after this morning’s blow up. It’s working so far.”

“We need some backup, Because by now Hiro’s probably convinced Sayaka and Hina to join in-- Maybe more.”

Mondo sighed. “Alright. But only because It’s for Chihiro.”

“Let’s go get Taka onboard too.” Leon grinned.

They went off In search of said student, But they were too late. Somehow Hiro and Chihiro had convinced the strict student to join in on their game as a hero.

So they went back to the dining hall to see If Hina would join them instead but didn’t find either of the girls there.

Though they did find Sakura and Celeste drinking tea.

“Where’s Hina and Sayaka?” Makoto asked curiously.

“They went running off with Hiro and Chihiro, saying something about apprehending the villains?” Celeste recalled. “I’m assuming they meant you three.”

“Yeah.” Leon confirmed.

“Celeste? You wanna--”

“No.”

“Hey Sakura,” Mondo leaned against the back of her chair, whispering something to her. She made a confused face, asking him if he was sure, expecting him to change his mind. But he doubled down, asking her again.

“I do not wish to be involved in this chaotic game of yours.” Celeste smiled, taking a sip of her tea.

Sakura sighed. “If you’re absolutely sure you want me to…”

Makoto and Leon exchanged confused looks. “What?”

“Hell yeah I do, Sakura’s gonna join us.” Mondo grinned as she stood up.

“Alright Sakura!” Makoto beamed at the unsure Martial artist. They went back to her room (Makoto cheesily referred to It as their ‘lair’, Sakura politely asked him not to call her room that again.), since the heroes would be less likely to find them there, and they devised a plan.

“Hmm, They appear to be really good at hiding.” Taka frowned.

“You can say that again.” Hina said after checking a closet.

Hiro hummed thoughtfully as he went over every spot they’d checked. “Maybe they’re hiding in a bedroom?”

“Oh heroes~ This Is a school announcement,” Leon’s voice bounced off of the walls, He had set up his amps In the main area outside the dining hall and spoke through a microphone. “We villains are gonna kick your asses!” He smirked.

“Where’s that coming from?” Sayaka asked.

“Sounds like It’s coming from the commons.” Chihiro answered. “Let’s go!”

The four took off running towards the commons area but only found Leon’s amps with no sign of the rockstar around.

“They’re totally messing with us.” Hina huffed.

“Yeah-- Hey, Where’d Taka go??” Hiro realized they lost the red eyed student and scanned around looking for him.

Little did they know, Mondo had been hiding around the corner and nabbed him when they were heading to the commons, The Biker dragged him back to their ‘lair’. “M-Mondo! How could you betray me bro!? We could’ve been heroes together!” He frowned as Mondo taped his hands with bandage wrap.

“Oh, I’m not Mondo. My name Is The Crazy Diamond.” He winked, Taka seemed unimpressed.

“Seriously? Your gang name? That’s sort of lame…”

“Yeah? Well what’s your super name?”

Taka smiled defiantly at the ‘villain.’ “My name Is The Hall Monitor, Villain!”

Mondo was going to diss on his name, But Taka seemed proud of It and he looked like he was enjoying this game too, So he let it go.

“Alright Hall Monitor.” Makoto started his villainous monologue. “Here’s what’s going to happen… We’re going to capture every one of you lousy heroes and torture you. Once you’re out of your minds, There will be no heroes left to stop us!”

“You won’t be able to catch all of us! I assure you of that!” Taka said confidently, though his confidence wavered once he looked around the room. “W-Wait a minute… Where am I?”

“Oh, This? You’re in our secret lair.” Leon smirked.

“But Sakura asked us to stop calling It that so… You’re In her room.” Makoto added.

Taka flinched in surprise. “W-What?! She’s a villain!?”

“That’s right, Kyoudai…” Mondo hummed evilly. “And the others have no idea.”

“You dastardly fiends! How could you do this!?”

“Quite easily, Actually.” Mondo smiled, jabbing his fingers into Taka’s sides. “Just think, all you guys had to do was ask her nicely and she probably would have joined your side.”

Taka shrieked and convulsed with laughter, trying to squirm away from Mondo’s wiggling fingers. “Nohohoho! Mondo! Stahahahap tihihickling me!”

“Sorry bro, There’s no Mondo here.” Mondo chuckled darkly.

“Thihihihis isn’t fahahahahair! I cahahahan’t move!” He complained.

“Since when have villains played fair~?”

While this carried on in their lair, Sakura had grouped up with the other heroes under the guise of helping them. She suggested that Hiro and Chihiro check the boys locker room while the girls would check over the commons area again. Chihiro and Hiro didn’t suspect a thing so they did as suggested.

“That’s really weird, It’s like they vanished Into thin air...” Sayaka pondered.

“They’ve gotta be hiding in either the boys locker room or a bedroom, We’ve checked everywhere else.” Hina said, turning to her best friend. “I think we should start checking rooms, Where should we start?”

Sakura pretended to think about It. “They could be In any room, Even one not belonging to them.”

“What would be the point of that?” Hina asked, walking towards the dorm rooms with the two girls.

“To throw us off, We should check any open room.” she said, smiling in amusement as Hina nodded In agreement, They began checking for unlocked rooms when they heard Taka shouting.

“HINA! SAYAKA! DON’T TRUST--” He was abruptly cut off, Most likely by someone covering his mouth.

“Taka??” Hina listened carefully for his voice again but heard nothing.

“I think It came from down the hall…” Sayaka said as they hurried down the hall towards Sakura’s room, finding the door was slightly open but It was dark inside so they couldn’t tell If anyone was In there or not.

Hina pushed the door open and crept In, feeling along the walls for a light switch. “Taka? Are you in here?” She whispered cautiously.

She finally found the light switch and hit It, finding Taka on the bed with Makoto covering his mouth. “Heya, LifeGuard.” He grinned.

Hina whipped around hearing shuffling behind her, not really to her surprise but definitely to the shock of the villains, Sakura had Mondo pinned to the floor with a knee in his back and his arms above his head against the floor.

Sayaka had also pinned Leon down.

“W-What?! No way! You betrayed us!?” Makoto gasped.

“Sorry, Makoto.” She smiled. “They had already asked me to join the heroes.”

Hina grinned victoriously as she tackled Makoto onto the bed, pinning him easily. “It was a good strategy, But did you really think Sakura was going to betray me? Seriously?”

“Sakura, I swear to god… When I get out of this hold, You’re soooo gonna get It.” Mondo growled, sending a glare over his shoulder.

“You don’t fight girls.” She reminded him cockily.

“DECODER! SUPERHIRO! WE’RE IN HERE!” Sayaka called upon hearing their voices down the hall, They came running in and looked on in surprise at the scene before them.

“Wow! You girls kick serious butt.” Chihiro giggled.

Hiro went over to Taka and undid the bandage wrap around his wrists. “You okay, Hall Monitor?” He asked.

“Y-Yeah, Crazy Diamond over there was tickling me.” he huffed.

Hiro looked over at Mondo and grinned. “Is that so? Well, You should return the favor.”

Sakura nodded at her cue, removing her knee and flipping him over onto his back. She pinned his arms above his head firmly, there was no way he was getting out of her hold.

“This Is such bullshit.” Mondo sighed in defeat. “Sakura, I promise you as a man, I’m gonna get you back for this.”

“Goodluck.” She smiled in amusement, Her tone borderline teasing. “I’m stronger than you.”

Before Mondo could further threaten the Martial artist, Taka pounced, digging his fingers into every ticklish spot he could find, Making the Biker shriek with laughter.

“It’s okay LifeGuard, We got Lucky Charm. Go help Siren remind Red Rocker why It’s a bad idea to conspire against us.” Hiro smirked as Leon yelped.

“You got It, Boss.” Hina giggled, Hopping off the bed giddily, approaching the struggling Leon.

“Nononono-- NAHAHAHAHA!”

Makoto tried to escape but Hiro caught him in his arms and pinned him down. “Nice try! You gave us a lot of trouble today, Lucky Charm.”

“W-Wait, H-Hiro, C’mon… You don’t have to--” Makoto squeaked as he felt fingers wiggling against his ribs, He looked over to see Chihiro smiling mischievously as they tickled him. “Hehehehey! Ahahahahaha! Don’t tihihihickle me!”

“You were one of the main villains who was being super negative earlier, So yes, We do have to do this.” Hiro sighed dramatically, using one hand to tickle Makoto’s belly while the other still held him down.

“WAHAHAHAIT! WHAHAHAT ABOUT BYAKUYAHAHAHA!?” Makoto laughed, trying to squirm his stomach out of reach.

“Oh, Don’t worry. We’ll get him too.” Hiro smirked. “But not before we completely wreck you.”

This went on for a while, Mondo was pretty pissed at them when he could think clearly again, But seeing the happy looks on Chihiro and Taka’s face's calmed him down immediately.

After that, The negativity that plagued the school seemed to evaporate. Everyone was in much higher spirits.

It seemed like one thing was for sure, when everything was upsetting and everyone was feeling down, they could count on a Superhiro to save the day and lift everyone’s spirits.

[thatoneticklewriter]

One Step, Two Step

(Ler! Childe/Ler!Kaeya/Lee!Bennett)

Summary: Bennett is having troubling remembering the dance moves of the band’s upcoming music video and Kaeya and Childe decide to help him out.

“Why can’t you get it right? You’re so pathetic!” Scaramouche yells at his idol member Bennett who was scrambled onto the ground clenching his ankle.

“Hey, don’t be so hard on him.” Diluc speaks up to Scaramouche actually feeling sympathetic for the white haired boy.

“We’ve been practicing this for weeks! Anyone with a brain cell can comprehend the dance moves by now.” The purple haired man rolls his eyes crossing his arms against his chest.

“Here Scaramouche, let’s take a walk around the building.” Zhongli attempts to calm their feisty member showing them out the door.

Their manager calls it a day allowing the group to take a rest though Bennett stays otherwise once everyone had left.

Everyone seemed talented to the white haired boy but himself. Compared to them, he was an outcast. Razor, a boy raised by wolves was a better singer and dancer than him. How did he end up like this?

Bennett lets out a sigh turning their soundtrack back on the CD player ready to recite the dance moves once again.

A yelp escapes Bennett’s lips as he trips over his own feet collapsing to the floor. Maybe I should just give up.

“Oi! What’re you still doing here?” One of the idol members Kaeya questions placing his hands on his hips with Childe behind him.

“I’m practicing the moves. I still haven’t learned yet.” A pout forms on his face explaining the situation to the men. “Why did you guys come back?”

“I left my bag here and Kaeya came to annoy me like always.” Childe teases the blue haired man. “You should take a rest, it’s getting late anyway.”

“No.” Bennett shakes his head. “I need to get this right before our music video. I don’t want to make everyone look bad plus Scaramouche will kill me.”

“He can’t kill you if you’re already dead by exhausting yourself.” Kaeya chuckles ruffling Bennett’s bangs.

“Maybe I should just leave. I’m not good like you guys. I don’t even know why Ninguang asked me to join the band.” Bennett wallows in self pity pulling his legs up to chest.

“Don’t say that. You’re the band’s eye candy. All the fans love you the most next to Diluc and Zhongli.” Childe sits beside the other slinging an arm around his shoulder.

“But doesn’t mean I’m talented.” Bennett remarked.

“Of course you’re talented. Why else would we want you around?” Kaeya adds joining in the conversation sitting on the other side of Bennett.

“To use me as a personal servant. At least in Scaramouche’s eyes.”

“Don’t worry about him. He doesn’t mean half of the things he says, he just wants everything to be perfect.” Childe assures to Bennett squeezing his shoulder.

“I just feel so behind. Everyone knows what they’re doing and sometimes I don’t even know what my name is or what I had for dinner last night. Maybe it would benefit you guys more if you found someone to replace me.” Bennett expresses as tears welled in the corner of his eyes.

“Cheer up Benny, it’s not the end of the world. We’ll help you with the dance moves even if it takes all night. You’re irreplaceable.” Kaeya gives him words of encouragement affectionately nudging his side though Bennett giggles from the sensation.

“We won’t let you quit the group. Ever.” Childe catches on darting his fingers towards Bennett’s neck and the other flinches from his touch.

“Hehehehe. I think I get it.” Bennett covers his neck where Childe touched him preparing himself.

“Sounds like someone is quite ticklish.” Kaeya hums observing the white haired boy.

“What? No I’m not.” Bennett’s awkwardly whistles sneaking glances around the empty studio. “I think we should do this another day.” The white haired boy gets up hoping to escape from his band members though Childe wraps his fingers around his ankle.

“Oh no you don’t!” He orders dragging Bennett to the floor and the white haired boy lets out a squeal feeling Childe’s fingers dig into his sides.

“Hahahaha! Stop it!” Fits of laughter erupts from Bennett’s lips as he tries to shield himself from Childe’s attacks.

“Me too!” Kaeya announces wanting to join in on the tickle fight.

“Hey! Noooo ahahahah!” Bennett giggles as the blue haired man grabs his legs playfully scratching behind his knee.

“This is going to be your warm up before we start practicing.” Kaeya says trailing his fingers up Bennett’s inner thighs and the white haired boy squeals trying to face away from him.

“If you endure this, we can start dancing.” Childe orders setting Bennett in his lap roaming his fingers underneath the white haired boy’s shirt.

“Eheheheehe! Please I can’t take this!” Bennett gives up doubling over not bothering to push Childe’s hands away.

“You can’t give up this quick.” Kaeya chuckles pulling off Bennett’s Sandals.

“Hahahaha Childe no!” Boisterous laughter escapes from Bennett’s lips as the redhead squeezes the soft spots of his tummy with his thumbs.

“Someone’s sensitive here, aren’t they?” Childe teases the other poking the center of Bennett’s tummy and the white haired boy flinches from his touch.

“Hehehehehe wait!” The white haired boy giggles kicking his legs as Kaeya digs in between his toes.

“Don’t pay attention to him.” Childe grabs Bennett’s awareness back by squeezing his sides earning a high pitch cry.

“This isn’t Ahahaha fair!” The white haired boy yells out, giggling helplessly.

“What’s not fair?” An evil smirk crawls onto Childe’s face as he playfully dips a finger in Bennett’s navel eliciting a howl from the other.

The white haired boy was a laughing mess unable to answer the redhead’s question.

“Come on Benny. What’s unfair?” Kaeya reminds their band member about the conversation joining in Childe to torture his upper body starting with his hips.

“That both of you are ganging up on me! Hahahahaha!” Bennett throws his head back letting out a loud laugh.

“It’s only endurance training. If you can’t handle it, then you can’t be in the music video with us since you won’t know the dance moves.” Childe explains the other wedging his fingers in between the white haired boy’s armpit.

“Hehehehehe! I can handle it!” Bennett shrieks falling forward trying to pry Childe’s fingers away.

“You’re also getting pudgy too.” Kaeya murmurs curiously pinching the flesh near the other’s belly button.

“What?! No I’m not hahahah! Stop it!” Bennett grows shocked at Kaeya’s comment but he knew the blunette was just playing.

“Do you think you’re ready to dance now?” Childe questions squeezing Bennett’s shoulders and the other scrunches from the sensation.

“Ehehehe yes!”

“And you’re not going to quit right?” Kaeya gives Bennett’s tummy one last scratch.

“Hahaha no I swear!” He curls over trying to shield his abdomen.

Kaeya and Childe decide the white haired boy has had enough allowing him to catch his breath.

With that, the two men grind the whole night to help Bennett practice the dance moves for their music video.

[heliosthegriffin]

Arc-Acres: One 1/?

If there was one place in the world that Arthur Arc could say he felt safe after a long trip hunting, and comfortable in raising his many children, it would definitely be his home, though his father’s old farm was a very close second, may the old codger rest in peace.

It wasn’t too far away from Ansel, around thirty or so miles away, sitting a mile or so outside of the settlement of Pelican Town, a odd name for the town if not for the incredible number of birds.

He had grown up there during youth, after his father decided to move out of city when the Faunas started getting....

And way, he didn’t regret his youth spent out there, he still had some, well not friends there anymore he had spent far too much time away there for him to still be friends, but well acquaintances that he wouldn’t mind catch up with.

Which brought himself to his sunny boy’s room, he hardly got to spend time with his youngest for one reason or another, but he was presented with an unprecedented chance to connect with his son over the next three weeks.

Summer break had started and schools would be closed for the next couple months, his beloved wife and daughters had decided to visit Saphron and Terra along with some other distant relatives in Argus on a girls only trip, and leaving Arthur and Jaune alone for the rest of the month.

Arthur would not let the chance escape him, He liked to think of himself as fairly progressive, but Arthur didn’t like how much his son was taking after his wife and daughters, the dance lessons, gossip circles, and, ugh, dresses they put on him when he wasn’t around couldn’t be helping his boy out in the masculity department, and he had it on very good authority as the boys father that he wanted to be a manly man like himself.

So, Arthur had devised a devious plan the Dark Brother himself would be proud of! The next three weeks... Arthur would take his Sunny Boy camping, fishing, and roughin it in the wilderness around his dad’s old farm! It was fool proof!

His son would learn how to be a manly man, learn how to rough it in the woods, fend for himself, and hopefully, hopefully, learn to say no to be put in dresses!

Hehehehe, Arthur you, evil, evil genius!

He knocked on his son’s door with heavy, calloused hands. The sound echoing loud and clearly across his house’s hallways, there was no doubt that his son heard him.

“Jaune? You in there?”

Arthur honed ears stumbling from the inside of the room, along with something heavy falling on the floor. Likely his son, the boy could dance a mean dance, but he had two left feet more often than not.

“Coming!” His boy answered, his voice that awkward in between a boy and man, coming out shrill and high, but also noticeably deeper than it had been when Arthur last left for his trip.

Arthur tried his best to respect his son’s privacy, he got it invaded enough by his daughter, so he always made sure to let his Sunny Boy open the door.

The door opened into the room, his sun opening it with a smile.

“Welcome to Casa de Jaune!”

Arthur stifled a laugh and entered his son’s room. It was a little messy, but no more so than any of his daughters, a few clothes scattered around and some book and comics left out, but he didn’t expect it to shine either.

Arthur took a load off and sat down on the foot of his son’s bed, Jaune looked nevous as he did so, but he too took a seat on a chair he had in his room.

“Soo, Dad what brings you around?” His son said clearly nervous about something.

“Oh, you know just a father wanting to hang out with his son for a moment, maybe ask him a couple questions.”

His son seemed to go pale at that.

Arthur could practically see his son’s mouth go dry.

“Uh, uh, about what?” His son’s voice cracked.

Suddenly Arthur very much felt like an interrogator.

Did walk in during a private moment? He was around that age wasn’t he? 13 or 14, wait he was 13 and would be turning 14 in august. So, he was around the age where he might be surfing on websites that his mother would be mad about.

A sly grin on Arthur's face appeared.

He leaned his head to the side and tried to peer at his son’s computer. Tsk, no luck, no suspicious browsers open, besides a couple scroll tube video’s about...  Hunter training? Why, he would find any good result on there beside how to get in shape, most, well actually all hunter kept their training a mystery besides the basis of basic in order to avoid their weakness or deficits from be known. All hunter tried to have as unique a style as possible in order to avoid predictability.

Was that a video on swordplay?

Arthur’s hand glided behind himself, his senses noticing a suspicious weight on his son’s bed under the blankets.

His son tensed up as Arthur pulled out a wooden training sword, a cheap one two made of plywood.

Arthur choose to say nothing, it was an open secret what his sunny boy what to do for a living, a profession neither his mother, or sister approved of, one that if he supported would earn himself a noose around his balls and tossed off a tree, his wife's words not his.

He put the sword on his lap, and looked at his son who seemed both ashamed and embarrassed, Arthur took a deep breath and smiled.

“Ok, this is not what I wanted to talk about. Sooo, let’s move on, if you want to talk about it later that’s fine. We good?” He had never seen his son nod so fast. “So, here’s what I want to talk about.”

“I want us guys, to go have a men’s week or two out,” That was a lie, it would be most of a month, he just hadn’t thought of a better way to phrase it.  “I’m been thinking you and me don’t spend enough time together, so we need to have some father-son bonding. What do you think?” Also he already decided it, he wasn’t giving his son a choice.

Jaune’s face let up at the prospect.

“I think it sounds great! What are we going to do?”

Arthur explained to Jaune what he planned, with his son seemingly more excited at the survival element of it, but looked kinda bored at fishing and more mundane elements he talked about. Though the excitement never entirely left his son’s eyes.

“When are we leaving?” Jaune said jumping in his seat.

“Well, tomorrow if you’re up for it. If not, well leave the day after tomorrow on Friday.”

“I’m ready to leave tonight!”

“Heh, a little too soon Jaune. You got to pack, and so I, then we need to pack it into the truck.” “Oh, yeah. By, the way what do mom and the sisters think about it?”

Arthur went silent.

“You’re going tell them right?” “So, you’ll probably want to take this too.” Arthur said handing his son the practice sword, a hungry glint in his son’s eyes now. His son holding the wooden blade possessively.

“Yeah, I will. And you’re mother will definitely love to hear that we’re fixing up the old cabin, but couldn’t due to weather, right?”  “Yeah, it really sucks, right? Can’t believe the way back got blocked so we spent all our time visiting your friend in Patch.” “Yep, then we came home and started cleaning up the house, right?”

“Uh-huh, yep, mom is really going to appreciate some lemon-squares.”

“Making a barbecue should help her after all the air trips, too.”

“So, I better get packing.” “Me too.”

Arthur turned around one last time before leaving the room.

“Make sure to pack clothes that breathe, shorts, and couple work clothes. I think it wouldn’t hurt to actually fix up the cabin a little, if a storm actually does blow in.

“Can do!”

Arthur chuckled and left his son to pack.

-------

AN: End of Part One. I’ve been wanting to write this story for a while. Buckle in children, we’re going for a ride.

Also the first couple parts, and chapter or two will be mostly from Arthur’s perpective, mostly so we can speed through the prologueish area and get to Jaune doing stuff. This first chapter or two will be Jaune learning the basic skills he need for the fix, so when he does something it doesn’t come out of nowhere, and it’s an excuse to portray Jaune’s dad as something other than unsupportive.

[the8thsphynx]

*Insert Seinfeld Slap Bass*

Prologue | Chapter 1 |

Characters: Grimmjow Jaegerjquez, Kugo Ginjo, Kukaku Shiba, Kisuke Urahara, Ichigo Kurosaki, Shukuro Tsukishima Pairings: Grimmjow/Ginjo, Kisuke/Yoruichi Genre: Comedy, Romance, Family, Government Espionage Warnings: Mature language, s3xual humor, fighting/violence, alcohol, mentions of death, rap battles with government officials

Chapter 1:

‘Shaking a Bag of Catfood Outside of the Shiba Residence’

The air on the outskirts of the Rukon District always had a lighter feel to it. Kukaku had seldom stepped away from her fireworks shop to enter the inner districts by the Seireitei ever since her brother’s passing, but even so she would occasionally indulge herself by standing outside of the Shiba manor to take in the sight of the mountain-like structure in the distance. The wind blew gently through the field of grass and Kukaku cursed herself for not wearing her prosthetic arm today to help protect her smoking pipe.

Through the whistling of the wind, she heard the front doors of the manor clatter open and someone approach her. By the familiar light jingling of a silver chain, she identified her visitor without even turning her head.

“I’m taking it by how soon you’re back, you couldn’t fix it?” she remarked with a puff of tobacco smoke.

The voice that replied was deep and male, “Don’t know what to tell you. I said I’m not familiar with pyrotechnic equipment since I worked with cars.”

Kukaku waved dismissively at him with her right stump, “Bah, I already told you not to try and explain that modern living world stuff to me. If you can’t fix my launcher then I guess I gotta pay someone to look at it. Anyways, did you let the cat in, yet?”

There was a pause from her visitor, followed by a shallow and sharp breath. Removing her kiseru from her mouth and flicking the ashes into the wind, Kukaku turned to face him and raised one eyebrow.

“You didn’t hear me or something, Ginjo?” she said with smoke coming from between her teeth, “I like that cat. I like his regular visits. Almost as nice to have come by as Yoruichi. Has he come by yet and have you let him in?”

Kugo Ginjo tossed a rag blotched with black stains over his shoulder and looked away from Kukaku, “Yeah, and I told you he’s irritating as hell.”

The head of the Shiba clan stuck her pipe between her teeth and wrinkled her nose, “Gotcha. Hang on before I go through with your request, lemme find the slip of paper that says you pay the rent to have an opinion over me.”

The chutzpah in Kugo fractured and by the twitch of his eye and clench of his jaw he knew he was backed into a verbal wall. He fixed the collar of the haori that the Shibas had lent him as he bit his tongue to avoid saying something he shouldn’t to the head of the household.

Unfortunately, with being ‘dead’, that meant he had come to the Soul Society with the clothes he had died in and nothing else. When Kukaku took him and his other two companions in, she offered him clothes that resembled a Meiji-era style, but unfortunately for Kugo this was the closest to ‘modern’ the styles got outside of very expensive custom-made clothing orders. This particular outfit was a fern green kimono with a scale pattern and a dark grey haori. Not that Kugo had any room to complain to begin with, but at least this one was bearable to wear.

As he opened his mouth to respond to her, the front door clattered open again and two men nearly double his size in twin uniforms disregarded his presence completely and bellowed to Kukaku like two henchmen to a yakuza boss.

“MY LADY, WE HAVE FOUND THE CAT IN THE EQUIPMENT STORAGE ROOM TODAY,” they thundered, “SHALL WE BRING HIM TO THE PARLOUR, MA’AM?”

Kukaku flickered her slate grey eyes from the giant men to Kugo and gave a wink, silently flaunting her intuition for the ‘cat’ having just arrived. She flicked the ashes in her kiseru into the wind again and began moving back inside of the Shiba manor, on the way smacking Kugo’s arm with the back of her hand.

“Storage room?” she mused, then waved her hand, “Nah, I’ll meet him there. Probably was looking for this guy, anyways. Koganehiko and Shiroganehiko, set things up for us in the parlour and we’ll be up shortly. Come along and help me greet our guest with me, Ginjo.”

One of the guards held out an open box with a fitted silk interior to Kukau and the other a small ceramic bowl with a wooden lid. To the ceramic pot Kukaku dumbed the rest of her ashes from the pipe and then carefully placed her kiseru in the silk-lined box. After closing the containers, the two giant men bowed to her and then went off back inside of the manor with shockingly light footsteps for their stature. 

Kugo grimaced and followed behind her down a flight of stairs, “...Hey, at least he didn’t end up outside like the first few times.”

The Shiba residence was certainly a fascinating structure; from the outside it looked like little more than a shack aside from Kukaku’s gaudy, ever-changing outdoor decorations and the massive sealed ‘chimney’. Directly inside, however, there was a staircase that lead to a labyrinth of lower levels, lit by a strange light-emitting herb that the Shibas planted inside of the walls and left open with shelf-like holes in the ceilings.

She lead Kugo to a specific sliding door on left hand side in the middle of the hall. The rest of the doors were normal, everyday-average sliding doors, but this one had a window beside it with a panel in place that said ‘CLEAR’ likewise with an opposite side that would say ‘WORK IN PROGRESS’. This was where Kukaku and her pyrotechnics team would construct, prepare, and store every manner of launchers, mounts, or casings for fireworks that were ordered. Despite the sign currently displaying ‘CLEAR’, Kukaku still knocked.

“Heeeyyyy, Grimmjow!”she called as she began pushing the door open, “You in here? We’re coming in!”

Being perfectly content with his distance from the room, Kugo had remained behind Kukaku with his gaze fixed into a half-annoyed glare looking away from the storage room door. It wasn’t that he outright hated Grimmjow, it was just… well…

The sound of the wooden door clattering open was enough to cover the sound and of course neither of the two were paying attention to their surroundings, so a black figure was able to successfully swing down from a hole in the ceiling where the light-emitting herbs were.

“VIBE CHECK.”

Perhaps it was his keen intuition or his reflexes honed from nearly two decades of combat, but Kugo was just barely able to catch an assailant’s foot before it came in contact with his head. In the space contained in a half-second, Kugo turned from confusion to burning irritation. Gritting his teeth, he yanked his attacker’s leg towards him, throwing them off-balance and sending them to the ground. Without missing a beat, Kugo used his free arm to come down with his forearm full-force on the attacker’s neck; they were just as fast as he was, though, and threw one arm up to brace the blow as they were slammed intot he ground with a residing ‘THUD’.

Kukaku was frozen for a moment at hearing the attack behind her, but then turned on her heels and snapped at the two, “GOD DAMMIT, I SAID NONE OF THAT IN THE HOUSE.”

Kugo didn’t look up at her, instead keeping an unamused scowl at the being below him. Bright blue eyes like lightning stared back at him and were paired with a grin more animal-like than human.

“Heheheh. You’re gettin’ slower,” a gravelly voice chuckled, “Careful, all you need is one misstep and you die, Ginjo.”

The fullbringer grit his teeth, “You’re a little late for that, Grimmjow.”

Kukaku slapped her one hand against the wall, making a noise loud enough that the two men separated begrudgingly and stood on their feet. The humanoid being that stood before Kugo was very clearly not human; not persay for his wild blue hair or the jawbone mask on his cheek, but for the air about him… a look in his cobalt eyes that gave the sensation that you weren’t talking with another person so much as facing a wild animal. What was it that Tsukishima told Kugo this feeling was…? Ah, right, the ‘uncanny valley’; a survival instinct in humans to recognize something that looks like a human but isn’t.

Kugo knew the origins of Grimmjow and what he was classified as, though, as thanks to Tsukishima-- his former mentee and current fellow guest of the Shibas--having used his complicated ability to see into others’ pasts to learn about Hollows, arrancars, and the Espada from others who had encountered him. Of course he couldn’t register Grimmjow as a person, for the pure fact that Grimmjow was the end of a long chain of congregation, mutation, and evolution of thousands of Hollows-- dead and forsaken or vengeful souls that became one person with their own unique personalities, typically with a lack of human emotion or empathy. It wasn’t as though Kugo was completely disgusted in such an existence, though; after all, a Hollow was the only reason that he was born with his own particular powers.

“Did you bring me my delivery, Grimms?” Kukaku piped up, holding out her one arm and beckoning for the blue haired man.

Grimmjow kept his eyes locked on Kugo and wore a flat expression while  fixing his short jacket and collar. Still maintaining eye contact, he reached inside of his black zip-up shirt and retrieved a white envelope packed full and thick.

“Right here for ya,” Grimmjow responded, “And you can uphold your end of this deal, right, Shiba woman?”

Kugo blinked at the arrancar and then turned to shoot Kukaku a questioning glare. He was no stranger to deals of a certain nature happening regularly outside of the club or even down the street from where he lived, and typically he didn’t care, but… was this really what was happening between Grimmjow and Kukaku? She didn’t seem like that kind of person.

...However, she seemed to ignore Kugo completely as she grinned back at Grimmjow and rested her hand on her hip.

“That’s a good man,” she nodded, “Knew I could count on ya to deliver for me. Alright, now before we talk this out let me get you upstairs and settled into the parlour. It ain’t right for me as lady of the Shiba clan to not treat a business partner with hospitality. You hungry, Grimmjow?”

Kukaku didn’t wait for a response before turning around and heading back down the hallway. The arrancar gave Kugo another glance, warranting another small scowl from Kugo which caused Grimmjow to smirk. Folding his arms behind his head and locking his fingers in place, Grimmjow meandered down the hall in the same direction as Kukaku.

He scoffed, “I told ya I don’t need to eat human food unless I’m in a gigai. Although… if you’re offering to feed me regardless, you ain’t gonna like what I tell you I can eat.”

Kukaku waved her hand, “Forget it, then. It’s other Hollows, right? At least that’s what I heard from Tsukishima. That’s not really an easily accessible game for people like us for a plethora of reasons but I mean hell, who knows? If I’m satisfied with my delivery I might just have to send Ginjo out to grab me a few of those little bastards for you. What’s a former Soul Reaper for if not odd jobs like that?”

Kugo begrudgingly found his way behind them and felt his eye twitch slightly again, “Excuse me, so now I’m just your live-in Hollow exterminator…?”

“Hollow catcher,” Kukaku corrected.

Grimmjow curled his lips and made a noise in his throat, “Ugh, as if I’m such a poor hunter on my own that I need an already half-assed fighter to catch a meal for me. No offense, Shiba, but if you’re gonna make this guy do anything for me I’d rather you get a--”

A stub of an arm was pointed back at the arrancar, “Business in the parlour. I’ll listen to you fully, but if I’m trying to maintain a system here I can’t go about making deals in my storage rooms.”

Kugo felt a familiar muscle in his left shoulder tense up as it normally did with stress. As he reached up to try and give himself some relief to it, he debated if he should make another remark to Grimmjow and Kukaku that he wasn’t just some chore boy or exchangeable item… then again, with how weird and wild these two were, his words would fall on deaf ears, anyways.

--------

A/N: This chapter took longer to come out than I intended simply because in the time frame I wanted to finish the last five paragraphs I ended up getting a looottt of work piled on me, but fortunately it’s up now! Next chapter will hopefully be only a few days behind it!

[jaegerboob]

WIP ROUNDUP!!

i was tagged by @trashpocket​ (hey bae ;)) and since im lonely here on tumblr and have no one but the void to yell at, i won’t be tagging anyone :((

okay let’s start off with my published WIPS lol i have quite a collection and boy do i regret posting most of these, but anyway that’s here’s my hot girl shit

"i’ll figure it out with a little more time” - (if u knew me at my thai BL phase no u didn’t :)) anyways this was a supposed to be a pretty short fic that features an oblivious Sarawat not knowing how to navigate his feelings towards Tine and Tine being an equally giant dumbass. their school is hosting a school dance and Sarawat’s emotionally constipated ass doesn’t know how to SPEAK and just ASK Tine to go w/ him. i swear i might be the author of this story but i also get mad at these fuckers

“we’re boyfriends?” - ah yes another Thai BL fic, i will admit. i have NO idea where to take this story lmao. i still wanna finish it tho cuz i hate disappointing ppl. the fic starts with Ae and Pond making a dumb bet so Pond will stop jerking off in their shared room and promises that he won’t do that as long Ae dates someone random and based off of Pond’s choosing. sweet bby Pete wanders into their campus accidentally  and gets picked. Ae does the deed and tells Pete they’re dating. Ae thinks that Pete and Pond are scheming to make his life a living hell but lo and behold Pete has actually fallen in love with him (heheheh) 

“i wanna ruin our friendship” - hello lgbtq+ community :). we all know where this fuckin title is from don’t be sneaky. so here’s my KilluGon college fic. I initially wrote this like two years ago and uploaded it on wattpad lmaooo then i edited it and posted on ao3 and once again i have no idea where to take this (ive forgotten what my original idea for this was lol) so basically Killua and Gon are really close friends and Gon is sortof a player in this AU idk why khdkadha but anywayz all of Gon’s exes have left him bc they’re jealous of Killua but Gon would never pick his current S/O over him so HAAA. it all goes to shit tho when Retz decides to trick Gon to taking her back for the school dance and idk what path to go for T_T 

AIGHT now for my UNPUBLISHED WIPS buckle up yall this is a LOT. all the titles are WIPS so that’s why theyre iffy lol

“pussy talented”- (don’t mind the title lmao i just wanted a cat pun in there somewhere) basically, Bokuto is a firefighter and Akaashi an editor. They work near each other and Bokuto often visits Kuroo, who works with Akaashi. Ofc Akaashi falls in love at first sight but then he overhears that he has a "Kenma" waiting for him at home. Akaashi assumes that he's probably Bo's boyfriend and then leaves him alone, making Bo confused as hell. Little that he knows that Kenma is actually a grumpy calico cat.

“killugon flower shop AU” - Wing owns a flower shop and Killua helps out with Zushi along with Alluka out of boredom and one day Alluka asks Killua to help out with her client then he meets Gon and is immediately smitten until Gon says that he's looking for something that he can give to a girlfriend (it was actually Ging's request lol), lots of misunderstanding, Killua being too shy to ask the handsome stranger out and Alluka and Zushi being done with his shit 

“rice isn’t the only thing getting crushed here” - Osamu falls in love with one of his most loyal costumers—Akaashi and he thinks he might just have a shot at it until one day while Akaashi is ordering a bunch of riceballs, Bokuto Koutaro of Japan's National Volleyball team enters the restaurant and sweeps Akaashi of his feet, unexpected angst and a generous helping of unrequited pining :)) dw this fic can go two ways: Bokuto is just Akaashi's best friend who he hasn't seen in months or b. Bokuto is actually Akaashi's fiance maybe i’ll write both endings heehee

“killua is sad and gets lovebombed” - while staying in Whale Island, Killua thinks he that he doesn't deserve Gon and tries to leave him while he's asleep but his plan is stopped when Gon wakes up and they both end up revealing their true feelings for each other

“excuse to write charles getting fucked by two delicious men” - Erik and Charles have been in a relationship for years now and basically fell out of love so when Erik gets promoted and has to move, Charles agrees and so they break up. Charles turns to Logan (who harbors a giant crush on Charles) for companionship and sleep together once. Logan says it was an accident but Charles wants more and they establish a FWB situation of sorts since Charles isn't ready yet. But then Charles gets into an accident and can't remember what happened the past year and a half so he still thinks he's with Erik. Meanwhile, Erik is living a luxurious yet empty life and when he gets the call from Raven about Charles' situation, he immediately goes back running.

“killua in whale island” - KilluGon are like 20-ish and Killua visits Whale Island and Ging just happens to be there as well. Killua thinks about how even though Gon and Ging are near identical, Gon just looks so much more handsome. (probs just a oneshot) 

 “another horny cherik fic” - Charles is a demon who was accidentally summoned when Raven, Hank and Ororo uses Erik's blood to perform a demon summoning ritual (as a joke) they didn't know it would actually work so now Charles is stuck with Erik because the human absolutely refuses to sell his soul

“IwaOi overboard AU” - Oikawa is a rich pretty boy and Iwa a college dropout who works at his uncle's repair shop with his younger brother Tobio and cousin Kyoutani ( both 5 yrs old). One day he gets called over to fix one of Oikawa's cars and after a failed and disastrous encounter with a drunk Oikawa, Iwa leaves the mansion fuming. Later in the day, it's discovered that Oikawa got in a car crash that took away his memories and since Oikawa apparently lives alone, he has no one to get him. not until Iwa comes ofc and with a malicious and vengeful intent, he tells Oikawa that they're dating and live together in his crappy apartment

“dancer Akaashi” - Akaashi is a dancer, Osamu is a bartender at the bar he works at and has also been in love with Akaashi for the past two years. He doesn't confess since he knows Akaashi doesn't like romance but then enters a bright eyed cheery Bokuto who sweeps the unreachable Midnight Moon off of his feet, bokuaka but im leaning towards bokuosaaka since akaashi deserves two boyfriends

“watch me be poetically horny for Akaashi Keiji” - Akaashi is a vampire and Osamu, a skilled artist. Akaashi posing nude and delighted at how beautifully Osamu portrays him. Osamu says otherwise. 

Cherik College AU - drift by great gable.... late teens cherik... Erik being a misanthropic horny bastard and Charles a snarky piece of shit.... they get paired up for 7 minutes in heaven... turns out Charles has been ogling him for a while now..  hmmmm,,,.,. ( i wrote this when i was drunk and my og draft is too long so take this instead lolz) 

“ BokuAka (NSFW) ” - Bokuto pushing off a guy who tried to hit on Akaashi while they're at a club. Akaashi gets so turned on he immediately drags Bokuto to the bathroom where he gets his facefucked in one of the bathroom stalls or Akaashi getting his face fucked in a dirty alley at the back of a bar after Bokuto gets into a fistfight.

“KuroKen (NSFW)  ” -Kenma does top during sex but but he's just really lazy to put in the effort 

aight that’s it oh damn i just now realize how much i have T-T bruhhhhhhh and this isn’t even all of them damnnn 

[octuscle]

Headed to the airport and thought I got on to the flight to Las Vegas but ended up on the flight to South Texas International Airport, not sure how that will work out for me, any ideas?

Las Vegas! A weekend of raucous parties. Gambling. Alcohol. You even had tickets to see Celine Dion. It was supposed to be an orgy in colorful LED and neon lights. And now you are standing here at this airport. The crickets are chirping. The men are wearing cowboy hats and boots. And you are wearing pink hot pants with matching chucks. And sweetie: The glitter top is really too tight for you, you should get yourself a size bigger.

And what should you do now? Take a rental car? You don't have a driver's license! One of the cowboys looks at you questioningly. He spits out his chewing tobacco and asks you something. After a second you think you have guessed what he asked you. Whether he can take you into town. Since you have no idea what else to do, you gratefully accept.

"An? Hare fahwar thuh rodeo?"

You think the question is a joke. But anyway, you say yes.

"Ah thought so. Yawl look lahk uh man who knows how tuh handle uh horse. "  

You giggle silly and hysterical. You wanted a unicorn tattoo once. But you were too scared of the needle. You pull yourself together. And say that you love animals.

"Say, Ah know yawl… Dja go tuh Sharyland Pioneer Ha Skoo?"   

"Pete? Fucking… Sure, we were in the same class together."

Pete doesn't make a face, just takes his right hand off the wheel and high-fives you. You ask if you can have some of his Copenhagen.

"So? Tell may, Connor. Iz chur luggage at thuh hotel yet?"

"Saddle, chaps and vest are delivered in advance", you answer. "But thuh rest uh mah luggage iz still sumwhere between Saint Louis an hare."

"Bro, let's go pick up chur stuff at thuh hotel. An then yawl come tuh may. Thayure's plenty uh room at thuh ranch. An Ahl defnutly hav sumpn fahwar yawl tuh wear."  

"Fuck, great, bro! Yawl know Ah hate thuh city. An Ah hope yawl hav sumpn tuh ride in on thuh ranch. Ah need sum trainin' before thuh rodeo."

"Hehehehe, is yawl tawkin' bout may, thuh Mexican stable boy or wunna thuh year ode stallions."

"Raht in thet order, bro!"

Fuck, you guys have never talked to each other that much. Not all junior high, not all high school. What luck you met Pete, you can't imagine better preparation for the rodeo. The hottest ass in South Texas. And the wildest stallions. I wish you the best of luck!

Thanks to @cowboyupcowboy2016 for the hot pic!

[tatyana-dreaming]

thoughts on Il Trovatore, pt 2

so, upon revisiting Il Trovatore and listening to it almost exclusively for over a month now, I’ve made some observations.... and also revised my initial reaction of “YOU’RE CANCELLED!!” re: the plot and characters

First, I’ll address what I find the most disturbing: of course, the whole burning people thing. I don’t even have the energy to go into the whole “wrong kid” plot point, because... yeah, nope. (Although “this is your brain on trauma” could actually be a valid explanation of that, if we want to go there.) But you know what, the sad truth is that people have done this shit to other people (and especially women/witches) for ages and especially in the original setting of this story, so it’s only being historically accurate, which I can respect. Kind of along the lines of respecting that Carmen is murdered in her respective opera; it represents a truth in the world (as long as it’s not done in a way in which that behavior is condoned).

What I still have a problem with is Azucena’s label of “Gypsy” (her mother as well) and the inevitable negativity/villainous narrative that comes along with that, which has always been and continues to be harmful to Roma people. No amount of sympathizing with Azucena and her mother (and I believe we are SUPPOSED to sympathize with them!! If you don’t... I won’t even go there.. that’s like watching Carmen and going “good, she’s dead now”) rids us of the fact they are still villains* (or, at least in the case of her mom, a criminal/intruder) and we know how harmful that narrative can be when applied to entire groups of people. Anyways. It is what is is, but as long as we can acknowledge it and spark discourse, I’m satisfied. This was also 1853 and the story was even older, so. Context + Critical Thinking.

*oh yeah, by the way - is it pretty clear that Azucena was behind di Luna finally killing Manrico?? The first time I saw it, I really thought she was a) just flat out psychotic but also b) really a loving mother who didn’t want her ‘son’ to be harmed, but seeing it again and then learning how the opera was originally to be named ‘The Gypsy,’ I got the impression maybe she had orchestrated Act 3/4 to happen the way they did, since it didn’t look like Manrico was gonna End di Luna. What do you all think? Is it obvious to you or do you think it’s supposed to be ambiguous/Azucena is just pretty unhinged and chaotic?

Then, of course, we have the RIDICULOUS Leonora/Manrico/Di Luna rivalry! Or, more correctly, just di Luna antagonizing people :) Somebody give that guy a hug (before everyone is dead at the end and all he can say is “e vivo ancor!“ heheheh oh cruel, sweet, dramatic irony) 

Count di Luna really reminds me of Claude Frollo in Notre-Dame de Paris (oh gosh, why do all these stories - Carmen, Trovatore, Notre-Dame) revolve around Gypsy women!? it’s the Threat to the Order I suppose). They are both “vampires” in a way; they are after the immutable radiance - call it what you will (life-fore? joy? love? innocence/optimism? willingness to live? willingness to love?) of their respective “prey” - Esmeralda, Leonora. These types of guys of course don’t actually LOVE these women, they are compulsively obsessed with the idea of them  - whether as angels or demons - and the need to possess them. Both Frollo and di Luna are willing to completely deny the actual feelings and agency/sovereignty of being of Esmeralda and Leonora, respectively, to “sooth their tortured souls”  (both, of course, blaming their victims for igniting fires within them). These vampires end up sucking the life force out of their prey, whose only option is to withdraw themselves from the living world in order to escape their predator (well, that’s what Leonora did. Esmeralda was unfortunately murdered because unlike di Luna, Frollo’s ultimate enemy was himself and his relationship to his faith... I think Not that THAT didn’t leave a body count of course. Anyways it’s been awhile since I read that book and wow this tangent has gone on quite long enough).

Well, Leonora ain’t about to take that crap. She actually knows what she’s about and she really puts 110% into her game. So what if her boyfriend is really less than ideal?? She knows herself, she knows what she wants, and she’s dead straight about her goals in life (I’m not saying they’re great) and no one can stop her. If I can support Juliet and her actions, I can support Leonora, because a) not only do their stories take place in the same era (I believe?? please correct me if you’re more familiar with the original story that inspired the opera) and b) being women characters in such settings, they really were at the mercy of the men in their lives (read: what happens to people like Azucena who choose to live outside of the suffocation of society - or the cloister) and their main way out was... well... to take themselves out. Which makes me a whole lot more appreciative of Leonora’s plot line, even if I can still be objectively angry about it because no one deserves that shit, period (and yet especially women have suffered through it for eons upon eons, so yes, it hurts). But that’s art - if it gets you thinking or feeling, it’s working right!

And you know what I realized? Leonora and Azucena are the ones who get what they want in this opera. (Okay, di Luna gets to take out Manrico, but that’s not what [cough, who] he really wants). Time to split this into part three and finally get to my realizations with some examples from the libretto because for the life of me I cannot say this all concisely :)

[faterpresources]

√Fɪʟᴍ sᴇɴᴛᴇɴᴄᴇ sᴛᴀʀᴛᴇʀs

A collection of random lines compiled from the game √Film Feel free to change the pronouns in order to better suit the parts involved. Warning: some crude language

❝ Buh... It's salty! ❞

❝ Um... Why are we here? ❞

❝ I was, hmm... a bit, butthurt. ❞

❝ Huh. You're like a ninja, huh? ❞

❝ Got all worked up for nothing... ❞

❝ Calm down. That's just a myth.  ❞

❝ Hey... that's... pffft... That's rude. ❞

❝ You are destined to dance with death. ❞

❝ I didn't call for you. I did not. Go away. ❞

❝ It's not a dirty story like you're thinking. ❞

❝ Kids these days eat that stuff up, right? ❞

❝ Winter had come for me, and me alone... ❞

❝ Don't recognize her face, but she can act. ❞

❝ It can't be as simple as a curse or a ghost. ❞

❝ ... But could you not call them dirty deeds? ❞

❝ We're finally gonna corner the culprit, huh? ❞

❝ From now on you may call me... Chemistry! ❞

❝ Geez.. How can you not have a proper suit? ❞

❝ This girl's stranger than that sham shaman.  ❞

❝ I feel I've matured after experiencing society. ❞

❝ Hmm... Is that something to be happy about? ❞

❝ Save the sleeptalking for when you're asleep. ❞

❝ Okay, that's enough clowning around for now. ❞

❝ Who cares if he's a big, medium or small shot? ❞

❝ I think this is the first time I've seen a real castle. ❞

❝ You watch it and get hyped for a test of courage.❞

❝ I'll be seeking out pieces of a half-baked mystery. ❞

❝ There's gotta be a secret...someone wants hidden. ❞

❝ I'm not a police officer, and I'm no superhero, either. ❞

❝ Y'know, these two seems like an adulterous couple. ❞

❝ Geh! That sounds like a seriously messed up place! ❞

❝ She/He really does have a tendency to act randomly. ❞

❝ This is the kind of thing you'd usually see at a shrine. ❞

❝ Your brain's probably just too slow to notice it's dying. ❞

❝ Oh boy... I guess men have always been perverts, huh. ❞

❝ The moment I take my eyes off you, you leave a mess. ❞

❝ Has your face always looked that stunningly handsome? ❞

❝ Ugh... I'm the type that always picks the wrong answer...  ❞

❝ It's not like anyone has anything to gain with a switcheroo. ❞

❝ It was brimming with spirit... And yet a faint scent of death...❞

❝ I'm used to incidents and being questioned by now, ahaha. ❞

❝ Anyway... It's that cursed film you wanted to ask about, eh? ❞

❝ You get to please your people and put food on your table, too. ❞

❝ Ok, I know I joined in on the joke, but please don't be ridiculous❞

❝ Dammit... for a former delinquent, she/he knows her/his manners. ❞

❝ That film's been giving me a bad feeling ever since we watched it. ❞

❝ You've grown quite cunning by doing dirty deeds under my direction. ❞

❝ But you better treat me to Korean BBQ or something after this, okay? ❞

❝ But the omens of the tragedy to come were already there in plain sight. ❞

❝ If this was a horror movie, the monster would jump out right about now.  ❞

❝ Anyway, you're the same as ever, ___. You haven't changed since college. ❞

❝ So what exactly is this Whatchamacalit ? Some sort of ghost sighting spot? ❞

❝ That's rude. I'm always nice, so long as you don't start spouting out weird puns. ❞

❝ So you say, but who else gets involved in two murder cases in such a short time? ❞

❝ The people may change, but this place hasn't changed one bit ever since I moved in! ❞

❝ Heheheh. Well, that's just an old legend passed down. Yep, just a legend. A folk tale. ❞

❝ You wanna pull off a culprit reveal scene straight from a detective show or something!? ❞

❝ I've seen that stuff in TV dramas and manga, but this is my first time seeing it in real life.❞

❝ It's a mystery drama that originally started production ten years ago, but was suspended.❞

❝ Even if it was a coincidence, you have a knack for getting caught up in these kinds of situations. ❞

❝ I don't wanna look like him/her, just live like him/her. Living with cute servants serving me every day! ❞

[armatization-a]

Happy British mother's Day! Today, I'd like to talk about: Yuri's mother, my headcanon for her and her relationship with Yuri

I've named her Ida, and I'm not sure why; I just like the name. So if you see that name in my Yuri threads, that's her c:

Anyway. So as we know, Ida is a prostitute. As luck would have it, she ends up pregnant at eighteen by a nobleman (she knows who. Yuri has a feeling, but he'd honestly rather not know). Honestly, she had every intention of leaving the kid. she's in no fit state to look after herself, let alone a baby

But when her baby comes along, this tiny life she can hold in her arms, she can't do it. She decides then and there that she will protect him with all that she is.

Ida has nothing in terms of education. She can't really offer Yuri much in that department, but she can offer him a certain kind of edge instead. She teaches her son how to be a natural charmer, how to win the hearts of men and women alike. No, she can't offer him money, she can't offer him an education, but she can offer him a chance to get those things on his own

The problem is, she also instilled into Yuri a love for family, and the depths one can go to in order to protect said family.

Does Ida know how far Yuri went pre-Abyss? No. She has no idea. He would simply come home with money and never explain where he got it, and no matter how much she pushes, Yuri never told her. If she's honest with herself, she doesn't want to know. She knows it will break her heart to know

Thanks to Ida, Yuri is also very devout. Believes in the Goddess, does not believe in the church. Two very different things. Hey, a trickster needs all the help he can get

Ida teaches him love, but she teaches him deception as well. Sure, Yuri's distrust of people is due to what he's gone through, but it's also in part thanks to Ida. Trust no one. Don’t let anyone in. Don’t get your heart broken like Ida did

(What do you mean, Yuri was born of a one-sided, complicated love? Hmm nope don’t know what you mean hehehehe)

Ida is the type of woman who takes no nonsense from anyone. A permanent wry smile on her lips. Confidence through the roof. In another life, you’d see her as one of those women with those long cigarette things. That kind of aesthetic. Despite her cold exterior, she is kind, and she is loving. She’s just been burned too many times

She absolutely adores Yuri, and in turn, he adores her too. They have a special kind of bond, the kind that can only be forged between a young mother and her only son. He’s a big mamma’s boy and I love that for them. There is nothing they wouldn’t do for each other

Of course, as illness begins to take Ida, there isn’t much she can do for him, but Yuri’s still there. As much as he can be. He sends food and money and medicine, but really, to hell with all that - all she wants is her kid

Eventually, that time lost will become Yuri’s biggest regret when she passes. He’d like to say they’ll see each other on the other side, but he’s no fool. She’ll be by the Goddess’ side, while Yuri won’t be anywhere near her

[armyhome]

You Are In Love | Hoseok

↳ summary - Inspire by Taylor Swift song You Are In Love.

↳ pairing- Hobi x reader;

↳ word count - 1.6K ;

↳ gênero - just in love you know;

↳ warnings -  You will falling in love with Hoseok again;

↳ Versão em português

I feel Hoseok's calm breath against my neck, his body is partially over mine, his leg over my waist holding me on the bed, I take a deep breath to smell his perfume. Years have passed and my heart is still accelerating the same way, little by little my vision begins to focus, I observe the drawings on the ceiling made by sunlight against the blinds.

I caress a few strands of his hair, I don't want to get up, but I have an appointment. Watching him sleep so calmly was the best thing in the world, time has gone so fast, it seems like yesterday that I decided to leave the sad memories in the past, switch countries, move on, and build happy memories.

With my finger, I was drawing over Hobi's nose, happiness was everything he helped me build. I was an intern at the art gallery, he was also one at the record company, we met on the bus, he was one of the few people smiling. If there was one thing that made me miss my country, it was people's smiles, and he brought it to me. One day, when I smiled back, his cheeks went scarlet which made me laugh out loud.

On the way home, he stopped in front of the gallery and waited for me to leave together. He said that even though it was safer than many places, it'd always be better not to be alone at that time. Then, on another day, I was alone cleaning everything after an exhibition, I sent a message telling him that I wouldn't leave at the usual time, that he could go alone, and if he thought it was too dangerous, he should take a taxi, that'd be safer.

Ten minutes after our usual hour, Hoseok appears ready to help me, still sweaty from practice, he tells me about how his group's fandom is growing, he boasts of being very dear in my homeland. When we're done, I offer him a coffee, we sit on the floor with our cups, observing our notable work, he rests his head on my shoulder, then I take a deep breath looking for his perfume “We are a good couple, don't you think so? You are my best friend, you know? ” He asks, I punch myself inwardly so as not to deceive myself with his words, "Don't get me used to it Jung Hoseok, you'll be an international star soon and I won't have my guardian angel anymore", I shivered reminding this, his hand was full of bandages from the practice "Let's go, today I'm driving. My boss lent me his car hehehehe" he swings the key.

We were silent the whole way, he used one of his hands to drive and the other to hold mine, my heart was beating so hard inside my chest, I thought it would jump out. "I'm falling in love with you, so if you're not feeling the same way, please, let me know."

His words draw all the air out of the room, I am usually the best person to escape this type of situation, but for the first time I don’t want to. So I try to kiss him suddenly, which causes an embarrassing situation, because the seat belt stops me from reaching his face, he laughs and I want to die right there. Little by little, he got closer to me, the feeling his kiss gave me was like watching the New Year's fireworks on the beach.

"You're falling in love with me again, right?" A sleepy Hobi asks.

"The real question is: When am I not falling in love with you, Jung Hoseok?" He smiles wide, but his eyes still closed "I need to get up, I have to meet your sister to help her organize everything for her wedding"

"If it's her wedding, then the organization is her responsibility too… This has become an habit of hers, to take you away from me is truly annoying" Hobi hugs me "Don't go please, it's my day off. Stay here, sleeping in with me"

"I like how your family includes me in their activities Hobi, it makes me feel part of something.." He sighs then lifts himself a bit, just to rest on me but without supporting his weight on my hips "I will be back soon before you could miss me. Promise!"

"Okay..." He surrenders, he holds my face in his hands and calmly approaches, but before our lips can touch my cell phone rings, on the screen the name of my sister-in-law "I love my sister, but in these moments, I reflect on whether these feelings are real or the society forces me to feel it..."

"Amor… You need to stop muffling Namjoon's books and I need to go and meet my sister-in-law!" I answer the phone “Put it on speaker mode”, she orders from the other end of the line.

"JUNG HOSEOK, YOU BETTER NOT BE THE ONE STOCKING MY PLANS FOR TODAY" Hoseok roll his eyes "AND DON'T YOU DARE ROLL YOUR EYES TO ME! And sis, I'm waiting for you outside" 

"Okay, I'm on my way!" I almost knocked Hobi off the bed while I got up, hung up the phone and ran to the closet wearing the first things I found, a denim pants and a Hoseok's T-shirt, which looked great on me. By the way, he watches me sitting on the bed, I hold my hair with a hand "Ponytail or nah?"

"Ponytail, that way people can see your face better" While I tie my hair he fixes the front of the shirt inside my pants and aligns the back, his hand stops at my hip and he gives me a kiss "Come back home soon, please!"

=_= 

The Jung family's taste was impeccable, everything was so beautiful that I felt lost there, I can feel everyone looking at me, it's almost like a weight on my shoulders, but Jiwoo smiles at me and embraces me by the shoulder.

"No need to be so tense, I don't call you to put you on a test or anything like that" She pouts while choosing her words "Hobi asked me to be the best men with you as maid of honor, and I don't know much about your style yet, so I think that you can find a balance between us"

Hoseok's family treated me like this from the beginning, as if I were already part of it. I was so nervous when he called me to meet them the first time, I was afraid they wouldn't like me, but at the first dinner, his mother hugged me as if I was her daughter, his father danced with me in the living room and we all laughed about my two left feet. 

It was late afternoon when we finally found the perfect dress.

When I get home, there is a note on the table, Hoseok saying that he had gone work out, so Guinho runs to me, entangling his four legs to greet me, he jumps on my lap and promptly turns his tummy up behind for affection.

"Did Hoseok hyung leave you alone in the dark? That mean hyung!" He barks as an answer.

The hallway has our photos: our first meeting, another from when we were having dinner with his family, the picnic on the day we adopted Guinho, the first day at our house… We  argued so much that day, every detail started arguments and more discussions. 

When we get to the room, Guinho jumps off my lap to settle on his plush on the sofa, I sit next to him and turn on the television.

So the television shows a image of me and Hoseok, covered in paint on, an old selfie, followed by the video of the two of us in the park with Guinho, quickly cuts off so we are painting the apartment, then I am sleeping with my head resting on his chest, “So that is what's like to hold the world in my arms? ” He whispers "I love you, Hobi" I say still sleeping, probably dreaming. My cheeks are burning, he always bragged about declaring himself first, but here was proof of the contrary, so Hobi appears on the recording, smiling, my heart accelerates a little more "I can imagine this moment since I was little, how will the person be, your name, smell, everything, but nothing was remotely close of who you are, because for me, everything in our relationship it was beyond any expectation that I may have created throughout my life! Your friendship, our complicity, wow how do we get that? Look up amor!" 

He points at the ceiling, so I see the stickers of the glow in the darkstars, when I look ahead again there he is, in person this time.

"I wish I could do this in a stadium full of people, scream to the whole world how much I love you! Eu te amo!" He confesses  "But, this will make you run away so..." He kneels, I feel that I am very close to a heart attack so strong that my heart beats in my chest "Will you marry me?"

"I love you, te amo, te amo" I answer and my eyes are full of tears, Hoseok hugs me "I love you so much that sometimes I think my little heart will explode! Obviously, I want to marry you!" Then he kisses the tip of my nose, I realize he's also crying. 

We were embraced in silence, because even in the silence, it was possible to hear our feelings.

[queenmuzz]

Three Sparda’s and a Baby....  Part II

I’m sorry if you were expecting a cute fluffy story about three grown men attempting to take care of a baby....

Devils Never...

Ao3 link here.

Devils never feel pain.   Well, not in this way,  they can feel the pain of flesh burning, tearing, ripping, but not the deep cutting pain in his chest, scouring through his nerves like acid, through his shoulder and down his arm, ending at his ring finger…. Or did the pain originate from his finger, and then into his chest?  Because on that finger was a slender gold band, a ring connecting him something he valued above nearly everything. Sparda freezes at the sensation. It’s a warning, but of what?

The answer may lay in what he holds in his other hand, dangling, choking, and yet still cackling.   He’s heard rumours of hell gates opening up bearing a familiar three pronged symbol, and demons bearing the same sigil.  And now, after weeks of searching, he’s finally gotten the culprit in his grasp. But why is there pain?

The three headed demon is down to one functioning head, the left snake one has been decapitated, the right lion one has had his jaw shattered, leaving the central goat one practically giggling in the Dark Slayer’s face.

“Heheheh” it wheezes before it coughs up black ichor, “It seems the Master’s plan has come to fruition, and I” another cough “am honoured to have played my part in your destruction” “Enough with your riddles!” Sparda barks, “Where is he!”

“Your betrayal was enough to keep Him contained, but thanks to your laxness, His servants have found out your greatest weakness.”  Its eyes close in pleasure, “I will die knowing that you will lose everything….” it lets a final neighing shriek of delight, before Sparda dispatches the wretch.  

Devils never value anything other than their own lives. In the Underworld, each demon looks out for what is most important, themselves.  Even when they submit to another demon, it is in order to preserve their own safety, or to gain an advantage against another.  

But Sparda knows exactly what this abomination is speaking of, and as the fetid corpse dissolves into ash, he realizes he’s walked into a trap.  He’s been led on a wild goose chase (humanity has always found charming turn of phrases, he’s realized), and unfortunately, he’s not going to be the one to pay the price.  He needs to get home as fast as possible. But he’s been led so far, that even by flying at supersonic speeds will take him a few hours. If only he had Yamato….but alas, he had given it to his eldest on his eighth birthday, as well as Rebellion to his brother (and of course, they had begged to take it to show-and-tell the next day, much to their mothers exasperation.)  So as he reforms into his true state, and unfurls his wings, all he can do is pray to any Divinity that is willing to listen, to keep what he treasures most safe…  

The burning pain continues until he’s around halfway the way home, and then the pain abruptly stops, replaced by ice cold.  This doesn’t make Sparda feel any better.

*****

Devils never panic.  When faced with unexpected circumstances, they automatically react in set patterns, analyzing their opponents and situations, and how to maximize it to  their own advantage. No emotion is used, it is all instincts.

He arrives, in the middle of a destructive thunderstorm, to a home that is ablaze, despite the rain.  Winds howl and thunder roars, but it’s not enough to drown out his screams of rage. There are a few remaining demons scuttling about, and he slaughters them with the finesse of two millennia of skill. But what of his wife, his children?

He braves the flames and rushes inside, screaming his wife’s name, his sons’ names, but the crackling fire obscures even his sight… surely they must be safe, surely they must have escaped…

And there he sees her, surrounded by runes of protection, keeping the flames at bay.  Red and black and gold cloth, cascading like a fountain… except she’s not moving. He rushes forward, to find her collapsed, her eyes open in fear, her mouth open in a silent scream.  Her long slender neck, something he used to find beautiful about her, where he placed the perfect amulet of silver and gold and ruby, is at an unnatural angle. Even so, he turns back into his human form, and places two trembling fingers on her jugular, hoping for some movement… There. Is. Nothing.

Devils never value their mates. To a demon, a mate is just a necessary inconvenience to reproduce.  Thus, they choose their mates based on who is the strongest, (but not too strong, one does not want to submit to a mate, but not too weak, for the progeny will inherit that weakness).  And after the deed is done, both go their separate ways, although sometimes, a last battle, often to the death, happens.

Sparda cradles his beloved wife in his arms, rocking her lifeless body back and forth.  She was the light in his life, a beautiful sunbeam that scattered the clouds of his soul.  Her voice, clear and sweet, could lull even the insomniac Dark Slayer into a deep slumber.

And now, she was gone, never to smile at him, nor to comb her long fingers through his hair, nor to kiss his nose, nor even to tell him how much she loved him.  It was all his fault. He had sworn on the day of his marriage to love and protect her, and he had failed. He’d become too confident, too relaxed, and she had paid the price…

All he could do now was  avenge her death. Perhaps it was in Mundus’s plans, but Sparda knew what he must do; rip open the barrier  between the worlds and take his revenge against the so called ‘God-Emperor’. He’d either cast him down, or die in the attempt.  His demon blood demanded it.

But there was still a matter that stopped him from going on a rampage….his sons.  He looked around, terrified he’d find their bodies, but all he could see were the shades of corpses of lower level demons.  Each smelled of magic, or gunpowder, signifying that however she had died, she had made it as hard as possible for her enemies.  But one corpse, located at the doorway didn’t have the smell of either...it smelled of the blade of Rebellion. That could only mean that little Dante had been here, hopefully attempting an escape  And as Sparda attempted to follow the trail, he could only hope that his youngest son had escaped.

Devils never feel terror.   They can inflict terror on humans, and in some circumstances, they can feel dread in the presence of particularly strong demons, (Sparda has caused that to infinite numbers of lesser demons)  But fear, or terror? No, a demon cannot feel it.

Sparda runs through the driving rain, torn between screaming for his sons, and keeping silent, afraid that it will lure them out, easy pickings for the demons.  He’s terrified that they’ve already been killed, or worse, captured. He knows the lengths Mundus has gone to subjugate anyone who has defied him (the Nobodies were once somebodies, before Mundus performed his tortures on them), and what better way to punish his former second in command, if he could not take him himself?

Lightning illuminates the muddy path, showing the corpses of yet more demons, these ones fresher, and not cut by Rebellion.  These ones were cut cleaner, if still a bit amateurish….obvious work of Yamato. He stills, straining to hear over the wind, rain, and thunder, and his ears pick up three sounds.

First, Dante’s terrified voice, “How much farther to the safe house?”

Secondly, Vergil’s, hissed “Shhhhh, you idiot!  They’ll hear us!”

And thirdly, to Sparda’s horror, the soft sound of what seemed to be blades being sharpened.  He takes his true form, striking from the shadows to find the Death Scissor at the base of a tree, skulking for what had to be the twins.  It doesn’t even have a chance to fight back, as he dispatches it with one swift slice. All it could do was shriek in protest as it dissipates into mist, its mask all that remains, before it is crushed under his heel.  He faces the tree (an old oak that he planted nearly a century and a half ago, when he first built the now burnt out manor), and in the flash of lightning, he sees his boys, both soaked to the bone, flattening their distinctive hairstyles to the point that they’re no longer distinguishable.  Although, Sparda can tell it’s Vergil, simply because he attempts to wield Yamato confidently.

“S-stay back!” his eldest says to him, obviously terrified.  Dante, equally petrified, clutches his brother’s shoulder. It breaks the Demon’s heart...his sons, while aware of their father’s identity, have only seen his true form rarely.  So he retakes his human manifestation, and calls to them.

Dad!

Father!

Both sons run towards him, and he holds them close.  They are both safe and unharmed, praise be, and he picks them up, to take them to the safe house, a place that will, be a sanctuary, if only temporarily.

“What about mother?” Vergil questions, and for once, the proud and eloquent Sparda is left speechless.  How to tell his sons that their beloved mother will never sing to them, never kiss them goodnight, never tell them how much she loves them?

“Vergil…” Dante says, and their father knows that the younger boy was there when his mother fell, perhaps in order to save him.  Does Dante feel guilty? He should not… It is his father who is to blame.

“We have no time, we must move” he says, clutching both sons as he speeds through the forest, leaving the hellscape behind.

Devils never care for their offspring .  The males usually leave after mating, and the females almost always abandon their young as soon as possible.  If they perish? Then they were weak, and not worth worrying about. That is the way of the Underworld, the weak are winnowed and the strong are considered rivals.

Sparda sits in the cushioned chair in the small cabin, Vergil leans on his left side, Dante, his right.  Both have been changed out of their cold wet clothes, toweled off, and now, hours after midnight, they’ve both finally passed out, clutching their swords, as if they are teddy bears.  Their father remains awake, alert to any dangers. But, as the storm finally subsides, he senses no danger and allows himself to relax, and to think of the future. Obviously, it is too dangerous to stay here, they must flee.  But to where? Sparda has accumulated residences and properties over the centuries, in various states of repair (Fortuna sounds tempting, but he has always been uncomfortable about living in an area that reveres him as a god) He needs to find a place with a good school, yet large enough where he and his boys can live in comfortable anonymity.  His sons need new sets of clothing, footwear, books (for Vergil), and toys (for Dante). And Eva….

He needs to go back in the morning, no matter the danger, to retrieve what he can, and to give her an honest burial.  She deserves that at least. She’d deserved so, so much more, but he’s failed her. He will have to bring her sons with him, to keep them safe from danger.  They would never leave his protection ever again. He must keep her legacy safe, to honour her memory, to give himself a purpose.

Despite the rain finally stopping, he feels wetness on his cheeks.  A leak on the roof? Or maybe he had forgotten to dry off his own hair….

Because as everyone knows…

Devils never Cry.