#meet hacker cute XD

[teecupangel]

You know I always thought the watch dogs would be a perfect setting for Desmond to take a step back from a assassin and just go around helping people, like Aiden with his vengeance for Lena, or/and causing chaos with dedsec in San Francisco

Since we already have an Aiden x Desmond idea where it looks like it’s shaping up to Aiden fucking Abstergo (and maybe even the Assassins) up for kidnapping Desmond, let’s make this one more on the side of Desmond trying his best not to be part of whatever mess DedSec is brewing in San Francisco and failing XD

It was meant to be a vacation of some sort.

The Brotherhood’s little ‘sorry we got you killed to save the world but, hey, at least you lived! Here! Have a little vacay while we try and find your team who went underground after they thought you died’ apology ‘gift’.

Why San Francisco?

Because apparently Abstergo hasn’t gotten their little grubby hands in it that much so Desmond would have a semi-normal life.

Free boarding. Enough weekly allowance to get by and even splurge on food once a week…

It was…

Okay.

But it can get a bit monotonous so he would sometimes take a walk, look around.

Maybe climb the tallest building and use his Eagle Vision to make sure there’s no reds nearby.

There were a lot of gangs around these parts apparently but they seemed… uninterested in Desmond so they didn’t ping as red.

Desmond supposed he could do San Francisco a solid and take care of these gangs but he was on vacation.

He was sure he was going to be roped into the latest POE-related bullshit after this so he’d rather be lazy for once.

He deserved it.

He fucking died.

But, of course, since his name was Desmond Miles and his main profession was ‘fate’s favorite chew toy’…

One sunny day while he was just ordering food from a foodtruck that makes really delicious chilis that made his stomach curse him hours later (worth it though), his phone vibrated.

His phone never gave any notification.

He wanted to groan.

It seemed it was time for his vacation to be over.

Only to blink when he took out his phone and saw that it wasn’t a message or email from the Assassin only called Bishop.

It was from an app that Erudito apparently added to the phone.

… alerting him that someone tried to hack his phone.

He looked around with his Eagle Vision.

… and saw a red phone.

He blinked once more and saw that the man holding the red phone was wearing a blue baseball cap and had glasses.

And he was staring straight back at Desmond.

He mouthed the words ‘Erudito?’ to Desmond and Desmond grimaced.

Great.

Some hacker now saw his face and thought he was part of Erudito.

He has no idea how to fucking hack.

So Desmond did the best thing he could do considering the circumstances.

He ran away.

And the damn hacker ran after him.

[lovelivingmydreams]

Raven Poetry

This is a collaboration between me and @skeletinmoss . Hope you guys enjoy it! Also this one is going too be a bit more mature than my usual stuff. So no minors. Fair warning given let's go

Chapter 1 moving day

___________________________________________________________

Roman hummed a song under his breath as he walked down the street. He just got all his registrations in order and he now knew where his stuff was delivered.

Apparently a little incident with some hacker villain early this morning had messed a bit with some registrations and changed around dorm rooms. They had offered to rectify the mishap but Roman and Remus both agreed to see it as a sign and make the best of it. Sure they wouldn’t be rooming together, but they might make new friends. It was an adventure.

He pondered going to the Hill bakery and say hi to Patton before heading off to meet his new roommate and unpacking his things.

From the corner of his eye he saw a cute guy walking on the opposite side of the street. Cast in shadow as the sun was on that side of the road. Even so, Roman thought he looked pretty cute.

He was also listening to music and Roman knew his non verbal cues well enough that that was a clear I-don’t-want-to-talk-to-strangers signal.

Too bad. But maybe they’d run into one another someplace other timee. He looked like he might be a student so it wasn’t impossible.

He considered following the cute guy’s example and listen to the latest RavenKnight video as he walked but thought better of it. Raven’s story times weren’t the kind he wanted to get distracted from by sudden noises. Not to mention, he rather keep a close eye and ear on his surroundings. And Raven had a talent for keeping his attention.

No sooner had he finished that though or cute boy stopped in his tracks. As if he’d heard a sound other than his music and looked around. Roman followed his example, already looking for a place to hide. Just when he spotted an alley with a big dumpster he could hide behind he heard the security alarm of one of the stores tear through the street. People screamed and dove for cover. So did Roman. But he dug in his backpack and retrieved a mask and a red vest with white frilly sleeves and a white cravat sewn onto it. With the practiced moves he gained by quick changing many times during theater in high school he put it on over his Newsies t-shirt and put on the elegant mask that completed the look. It wasn’t the most comfortable costume. But it both hid his identity and made him instantly recognizable.

He took a look at the situation and saw to his shock that a villain had some kind of gizmo aimed at the cute guy’s face.

Adrenaline now racing Roman wracked his brain for a plan.

“This day did not go as planned, I wish I had the upper hand, I still wanted to do so many things, but my shoes would need to have wings!” he whispered urgently under his breath.

It wasn’t his best work but he was under pressure. He could feel his words take effect though. Like an imaginary muscle his power settled around his hands moving to his exact thoughts. Telekinesis. It wasn’t especially strong. But if he used it right. He could get that weapon and the hostage away so the police that was arriving on the scene could focus on the villain shouting out demands.

Roman wasn’t really listening. His priority right now was the civilian. Not entertaining a low level villain. The civilian was the only obstacle for the police.

He used the power he’d just granted himself to propel himself forward faster than he could’ve run while the villain’s attention was on the officer who was taking point in negotiations.

Again the civilian seemed to react to some kind of sound or something Roman hadn’t heard.

It didn’t matter though. Before the boy fully registered that he was heading towards him he had ripped the gun out of the villains hand and flown it into the nearest trashcan for the police to retrieve safely later, and scooped up the civilian floating himself up and away from the line of fire, in the direction the former hostage had been walking earlier.

“There you are. Everything alright?” he asked.

The civilian blinked a few times and looked around as if to orient himself. Understandable he’d gone through quite a lot the past minute or so.

His eyes focused on him, and he was definitely cuter up close.

After a moment Roman could pretty much see it click for him what had happened and the young man settled a bit more comfortably in the princess carry.

“Much better up here than down there. Which is saying something,” he quipped. Oh he had jokes! And he was kinda funny while he was at it.

“So. You’re that new Prince guy?” the stranger observed as Roman floated them a bit further down the street away from all the chaos and a bit lower so they wouldn’t crash should his boost run out.

“Indeed!” he nodded, always a little happy when he didn’t need to introduce himself. Which happened increasingly less. “I’m actually not that new anymore! I have quite a few fans!” As evidenced by his lessening need to introduce himself, the fact that there was a subredit dedicated to sightings of him and the first pieces of fanart even.

“Whatever makes you sleep better,” the civilian in his arms shrugged, though it didn’t seem malicious in intent.

Roman chuckled. “Oh you’re a feisty one,” he pointed out. Returning the playful tone.

Suddenly there was a mischievous glint in the boy’s eyes. “You like?” he wondered, his voice maybe half an octave deeper than his normal speaking voice.

Roman blinked a bit taken aback. “Oh wow,” he breathed, a bit impressed.

Clearly the former gent in distress took this as an invitation to push it further and go down to a full octave beneath his normal voice. “Watch it princey,” he muttered in a warning tone before dipping somehow even lower. “This kitty loves to bite,” he purred with a chuckle as he ran a finger from Roman’s collarbone up to his chin. The poor aspiring hero/journalist was completely flabbergasted.

And then as sudden as the very… Intense, theatrics had started, then disappeared.

“Oh look my stop!” The young man called out as he noticed the ground was close enough for him to jump down, which he did with ease. “See you later pretty boy,” he announced with a salute before walking off.

Roman let his feet touch the ground and tried to process what just happened.

Did he just… But he was wearing a mask so how could he know if he was pretty? Still. He was definitely flirting with him right?!

Deciding to put the gay panic aside for now he turned around and did a quick wrap up chat with the police, stated to the press that he had only taken the hostage out of the equation, snuck away to get his things, put away his hero get up and headed to his dorm room trying not to think of the charming, angel (or demon) voiced heathen he’d saved today. Damn that voice… It sounded vaguely familiar honestly. Where had he heard it before?

When he got to the dorm he heard the local radio host announce the next song and someone inside moving around.

His roommate was here already. And he would not be distracted by a stranger with a voice capable of… Whatever that was.

He took a breath. He could do this. New friend. Let’s go.

He knocked first, not wanting to startle his roommate. He could swear the movement stopped right before his fist hit the wood though. Probably a coincidence.

Fairly sure he had announced his presence properly he used the key he was given to let himself in.

“Hi, Virgil Grimm?” He read from the form he’d been given. “I’m Roman Reston. I’m your roommate,” he said as he stepped inside and looked up only to freeze. It was him. The guy from the robbery/hostage situation of earlier.

Virgil-with-a-voice-that-is-driving-him-nuts-Grimm, looked at him, giving him a once over and offered him a smirk.

“Hi there Reston. Your stuff is over there,” he nodded to the boxes that had ‘Ro’ on them in red letters. Luckily he was using his normal voice.

Roman managed to nod and give him a tight smile, which of course got him a weird look.

He decided to focus on unpacking and working through gay panic 2 electric boogaloo in silence.

Virgil asked him if pizza for dinner was alright for tonight. He agreed and put down some cash to pay his part. “Anything except fish is fine,” he stated as he picked up the last box to take to his room.

“Kay,” Virgil nodded as he checked the money and started calling in.

Turns out Virgil had good taste in Pizza too. He got half pepperoni half quatro fromage and he remembered the garlic knots.

He tipped the delivery guy and gave Roman back his fair share of change.

They sat down and ate pizza together.

“So… What do you study?” Virgil asked.

Roman swallowed away the cheesy bite he’d just taken.

“Journalism. I freelance a bit already actually,” he tells him, a little worried Virgil will recognize his voice. Why doesn’t he throw his voice when he does hero work. That’s going to change.

For now it doesn’t seem to click for Virgil so that’s a relief.

“Cool. I do computer science,” he replied.

Roman couldn’t help a chuckle. “You don’t look like a computer nerd,” he notes before he can stop himself.

Virgil chuckles, which doesn’t bring back memories that have Roman fight down a blush.

“I don’t,” he agrees. “But it’s actually pretty interesting. I took a few courses over the summer to get the basics down and it changed the way I saw literally everything. Even the app we used to order that pizza. It’s pretty dope,” he explains.

Roman nodded in agreement. Taking a next slide. If Virgil noticed the way he couldn’t quite stop staring at him in discomfort then he didn’t mention it.

They finished their dinner and went to their respective rooms.

Roman decided to try not to think of his roommate and that enchanting strangely familiar voice and instead listen to that video of RavenKnight he’d been sporadically thinking about all day.

He got settled on his bed with his laptop and navigated his way to the video.

“Alrgiht, Raven. Distract me from my hot roommate,” he muttered under his breath.

He clicked play. “Good day or possibly good night everyone. Welcome to my Murder,” the deep voice hummed into his ears making Roman stop the video.

He just realized where he knew that voice from.

His Roommate was one of his favorite youtubers.

[t4c0c4tr4dst3r]

can't remember if I've reblogged this already— but here's my main two boys!! (Its a romantic selfship for both of them) :D

(btw the zura lyre character mentioned below is my self insert for them! sometimes I swap between saying i/me and the characters name ^^;)

♡

first up! is matt!! :3 here's some info!~

• the way we met?: motherboard was looking to recruit another earthlie onto the cybersquad and chose me! (this took place during the middle of season 1, think around the episode "of all the luck"!)

• zura doesn't live on the earth that the other 3 do, so matt and i visit eachother portals that show up when we want to see eachother E:

• self insert lore: shes a fan of cyberchase that got transported into their world to join the cybersquad and matt is curious about what she knows of the cybersquads missions prior to meeting her

• autism + adhd duo, he loves talking about greek mythology (his special interest) he was so happy to be on mount olympus for a mission, let alone twice! ^^ (see episodes "zeus on the loose" and "out of sync")

• jackie and inez have told me that he's constantly gushing about me and it's so cute. though they're probably just as annoyed as mimi xD (mimi is a friend of my self insert)

♡

and next is slider!! or sly for short! >w<

• we met during the events of the episode "Totally Rad"! i had to replace inez in the skate off because she got injured before she could compete. sly caught me when i was falling out of the portal motherboard summoned :>

• we wouldn't meet again until the events of "Past Perfect Prediction"! where we helped slider earn 5,000 snelfus so he wouldn't lose his garage to hacker! >__> and we wouldn't start dating until the events of the episode "A Crinkle in Time"! (at the end is when we made our relationship official once i and the rest of the cybersquad made it out of Tick Tockia)

• bonus note: i also get along with his dad, coop, pretty well ^^ i didn't meet him until the events of the episode "A Clean Sweep" =]

• insert me / zura speaking literal binary (like vocally speaking code, i think it'd sound like the audio "friendly faith plate" from portal 2 haha) and scaring the fucc out of slider ;__; cue him asking how i can do that and if other humans can too xD (context: zura can do that because he vocals are kinda fried and uses it to confuse people, don't ask the specifics on how it works i just thought it was a funny idea lol XwX)

♡

in both relationships they have and said they'll continue to sing me to sleep when i genuinely want to but can't. they're the sweetest guys ever ;w;

reblog this with your F/O(s) and I'll assign them a piano/ classical music piece that I think fits them!!! you can give me a tiny description of your relationship, if you'd like (though it's completely optional)!

it could be with F/Os of any type, really!

[thefanficmonster]

Stranger In The Crowd

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None

Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having recently ended the process of moving, Y/N is rightfully very tired but also very excited for the new chapter of her life. Funnily enough, this new chapter includes a newly formed long distance friendship/crush with a very special person from San Diego.

Requested by @boiled-onionrings Hi darling! Thank you so much for your wonderful request and I’m really sorry you’ve had to wait so long for it to be posted but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy the read! Love, Vy ❤

I let out a heavy sigh, relieved to finally be at home after such a long day of standing around in the Georgia heat with only a thin layer of fabric to protect my eyes and head from the scorching sun. Yeah, anyone who says that tent did well at protecting everyone under it today is nothing but a liar. I was in a short, strapless white summer dress, the fabric of which barely had any weight and consistency to provide heat of its own yet I still damn near melted. Ok, I’ll admit, some of the roasting heat probably came from the energy and force I put into singing the songs of my band’s new album ‘Starting At The End’. 

The mini concert we held in this large open field was meant as an introduction to the city of Savannah where all the band members - myself included - are actually from but we all moved to the West Coast to pursue our music career. And now that we’ve grown, and the majority of us are married, one of us is a father now as well, we’ve decided to return to our hometown. The decision was so spontaneous and was executed so quickly due to no one objecting to it that it still hasn’t me that I’m no longer in LA. The heat isn’t helping my ‘processing’ process but I’ll get to it eventually. Do I miss LA though? Not sure I do - I think I more miss the people I was closer to while I was there.

Suddenly, as if perfectly timed, my phone dings, notifying me that I’ve received a message. I don’t have to look to know it’s from - there’s only one person I actively text and his name is....

C ~ Your virtual buddy Corpse here, making sure you didn’t die of a heatstroke today. If you did indeed survive, just reply to this message, if not....don’t do anything, I guess.

I can’t help but giggle at the sight of the message. I promised Corpse I’d text him after the concert to let him know I was ok, but the even dragged out for longer than anticipated so I’m guessing he got worried.

How cute.

Me ~ Alive and well, but I do feel like a popped tire of an overloaded truck. Hope that’s a visually appealing description

Corpse and I met on the charity livestream Jacksepticeye organized and invited our band to so we could play Among Us with some of the best gamers and streamers on the internet. It was a huge honor and a ton of fun, definitely an event I’d like to repeat in the near future because I had such a good time and I know all my bandmates did too. We all got acquainted and even became official friends with the gamers that were practically our hosts, Corpse becoming the closest friends I’d earn. That livestream happened months ago and we still text just as consistently.

C ~ Oh I know EXACTLY what you mean. Anyway, as to not exhaust you further to force you into typing, how about you send me pictures to sum up your thoughts and emotions and plans for the evening

This is OUR THING trademark, mine and Corpse’s and no one can take it away from us. It’s a significant element of our friendship that enables us both to understand one another when one of us feels the way I described in my message - a popped tire or a deflated balloon. I’m usually the exhausted one - blame the many shows we do and the many meet-and-greets we organize for our lovely fans. It’s the type of exhaustion none of the band members mind at all, but we definitely need some time to recover from it.

As I go to sit down on my couch, the flower crown I’ve been wearing slips off the top of my head, falling on the floor, creating a soft noise that attracts the attention of one of my many cats - Sasha. She’s the youngest and most curious kitty in the family, always protected by the other four - Luna, Cassie, Silver and Lynn. Those four are far lazier and a lot more disinterested in comparison to Sasha who immediately runs over to see what’s fallen.

I smile to myself, taking the flower crown and undoing it to lessen it by a few stems to make it smaller, all the while being watched by the curious Sasha whose interest is rewarded in the end when I put the now adorably tiny flower crown on her head.

While she still hasn’t shaken the thing off I manage to snap a pic which I send to Corpse who opens it mere seconds after it was delivered. 

C ~ Sasha’s pulling off your aesthetic better than you. Sorry, someone had to let you know

I burst out laughing for two reasons - 1.The message itself, damn it! It’s hilarious; 2. Corpse has learnt the name of each one of my cats and never mixes them up - not even Luna and Lynn who look almost identical. That amount of attention to detail is astonishing and very meaningful to me, it genuinely warms my heart and that may or may not be dramatic but it’s definitely not exaggerated.

Me ~ You think I haven’t caught on yet? 

C ~ Well, if it makes you feel any better you pull off my aesthetic better than I do

He’s referring to the e-girl look I did for one show the band had in downtown LA one night. I was drunk and looking forward to trying new things so I improvised the hell out of my outfit but I apparently looked presentable enough to leave a good impression on Corpse despite the pic I sent him being a bit blurry and being a mirror selfie in the bathroom of the very bar we were performing in. It goes without saying that the mirror was dirty too - had a bunch of writing on it which Corpse said only added to the aesthetic. Looking back on it now I kinda agree, and luckily so did the fans in the comments of that same photo when I posted it on Instagram.

Me ~ Means a lot actually. Nowhere near enough to aid the burn of having a cat pull off cottagecore better than I do, but still helps XD

As if sensing that we’re talking about her, Sasha hops on the couch, poking her head over my phone to look down at the screen.

Now this is gonna be golden.

I take a selfie with my phone in my lap, the camera capturing both me and Sasha at a rather unflattering angle which has me losing my mind laughing when I send the picture to Corpse who immediately sends back a string of cry-laughing emojis.

C ~ I can’t tell which one of you is cuter

Me ~ If that was a compliment, I gotta say I appreciate it greatly

C ~ Just telling the truth ;)

It’s times like these that the butterflies in my stomach remind me just why I’ve started catching feelings for this man despite all the distance between us and despite barely knowing him - he knows me more than I know him but I don’t mind it, oddly enough.

I’m fond of our connection and though I sometimes dream of something more, I’m also content with what we already have considering that ‘something more’ seems rather unattainable as of now.

My phone dings again, clearing the fog of thoughts and presenting me with a new message from Corpse.

C ~ Oh, by the way, look what I got....

That message is followed up by a picture of a ticket. A plane ticket to Georgia! 

While I’m still busy stomaching this and dealing with my quickly rising excitement, he sends another message.

C ~ I hope to catch a The Silver Rays concert while I’m there. Heard they had an adorable frontwoman ;)

My breath catches in my throat as a wide grin spreads across my face. The thought of having Corpse so close to me sends those aforementioned butterflies in my stomach into a raving mood and they practically explode my insides with excitement and joy like I’ve never felt it before. I can’t wrap my brain around the fact that we’re about to go from having an entire country between us, to being just some ways away - him in the audience and me on stage without a single clue of who to look for. That’s part of the excitement though, I guess, part of the guessing game that’s gonna make our meeting all the more interesting.

He’ll be a stranger in the crowd and I’ll be a performer on a stage - seemingly two people who have no relation whatsoever. But damn does it go beyond that: No one has to know how hard I’m falling for that stranger in the crowd.

Me ~ I’ve heard so too, can’t confirm it though

If this is gonna be a guessing game, I’ll flip the tables a bit - I won’t take any guesses. I’ll let the answer come to me. I’ll give the first move over to the stranger in the crowd, let’s see what he does.

C ~ I’ll check and let you know, don’t worry

Not worried whatsoever, Corpsie. I’m not worried at all.

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[hacked-by-jake]

Hello, just wanted to ask you how you're doing :)) Btw, if you haven't already, can you do some cute HCs about Jake and MC going for a walk in the park? Thanks! :)) Also no, I ain't old school like Phil. I just like using smileys ;)

Headcanon

Summary: Spend a nice afternoon with Jake in the park.

A/n: Hi, I’m fine, thank you so much for the question. I hope you’re fine, too :D

So here we are, it’s just a small headcanon and I hope you will like it and it meets your expectations. Thank you for your nice request and have fun.

I’ve started using those smileys again since I first spoke to Jake. I’m also not old school, just in love xD :)

It’s a normal afternoon as usual. Jake was bored, he had nothing to do so he suggested taking a walk through Duskwood. Of course you said yes.

Since Jake knows full well that you won’t wear a jacket, even if he asks you to, he’s waiting for you next to the door with one of his sweaters. Without saying anything, you smile happily at him and put the hoodie over your T-shirt.

Jake will hold your hand in his hand from the first moment.

He will always give you light kisses on your hand or fingers all the time.

He’ll be stroking your back of your hand with his thumb all the time.

You are not in a hurry, take all the time in the world and just take care of you two. No phones, no computers, no other people, just you two.

Jake will ask you to tell things about your day, what your thoughts are, how you’re doing. If you have plans for the next few days, or if there is anything else.

He’ll be watching you all the time.

He’ll make little comments, jokes, he’ll tease you a little, make you laugh.

He’ll always smile when you laugh at one of his jokes.

He’ll keep telling you how pretty you are.

In between there is a little silence, no unpleasant, a beautiful one, one in which you just enjoy the togetherness.

In some moments, when you laugh or joke, he will raise your hand and make you make a spin.

Jake will pull you over to him to kiss you over and over again.

In Duskwood’s Park there is a small kiosk where you can get some ice cream, as well as coffee, waffles, sweets, other varieties to drink. All little things for a nice afternoon.

Jake’s gonna ask you if you want ice cream and then buy one for each of you.

Duskwood’s park has a small lake around it, benches to sit on. He will choose the one furthest from the others so that you can be alone.

You’re gonna eat your ice cream, talk about trivial stuff.

You will lean on him, he will put an arm around you and you will enjoy the sun and the beautiful weather.

Jake’s gonna play with your hair.

He will tell you stories from his life, things he experienced as a hacker.

He will ask you a riddle question to think about, he will give you just a few and simple tips.

You will simply have a peaceful afternoon and a beautiful afternoon where you forget the time. There are fewer and fewer people around you but you don’t realize it because you just focus on each other.

Jake will only then ask you if you want to go home when the sun begins to set.

He will tear down a flower you find beautiful and give it to you slightly shy. As a thank you, you give him a short kiss, which he will prolong, while behind you the sun disappears more and more.

He’ll suggest watching a movie when you get home.

You will spend a wonderful evening full of cuddling and love, and simply fall asleep in each other's arms.

Masterlist

[imagine-akudama-drive]

can i request headcanons of courier & hacker with an ordinary citizen as a s/o? :)

Ooh this is very cute! I’m definitely biased towards the Akudama with an ordinary citizen s/o ❤️ just a guilty pleasure of mine! XD

*Admin Designer*

Ordinary Citizen S/O Headcanons

Courier

Chances are you two met while he was out on the job. You might have mistaken him for a normal delivery man, but nope. He’s the one and only Courier.

If you’re not frightened off by what he does, then he will come to appreciate your persistence at wanting to get to know him. He’ll be a bit annoyed at first, though.

Once you guys start dating, Courier will become much more cautious. No way in hell will he be risking the chance that you’ll get hurt because of him.

Whenever he has the chance, he’ll be asking to see you. To minimize any potential blackmail or extortion, he will ask that you meet him at an already designated place far away from both of your homes.

He will quietly listen as you tell him about your day, such as what you did, where you went, etc.

Before heading out for a particularly dangerous job, he’ll make sure he sneaks in a few kind words to you. Just in case. “S/O, don’t go off with other shitheads. Take care of yourself.”

Courier will be a little inclined to talk to you about his job at first. For him, being with you is a way of forgetting that dreary world for just a few minutes. He will want to enjoy your presence more than anything else.

Hacker

He might have noticed you during one of his hacking heists. For example, you might have accidentally appeared in one of the security tapes that he was gazing over.

He’ll get to know you through video feeds and chats. He’s more comfortable talking to you from the comfort of his home.

Speaking of which, Hacker will probably be just as cautious as Courier with his relationship with you. He might delete the convos between you two, archiving them in a place that’s very well protected.

He’s very tech savvy, so he’ll always be finding ways to impress you with his knowledge, especially if you express interest in what he does. He’ll explain how he came to be so good with computers, how he’s always looking for a challenge, and might even mention a few of his hacking quests. Just not too detailed!

It might be a bit creepy, but Hacker will enjoy watching you as you go about your day to day life. He might spy observe you at your workplace, watching as you focus on your job.

Though you are considered an ordinary citizen, there will definitely be something about you that interests him. He craves enjoyment, so I imagine being with you is a feat in itself that he might find challenging. After all, what task could possibly be harder than having to keep a relationship with a normal person a secret? While enjoying it?

Despite his wanting to be safe, Hacker will sometimes make a bold move and send a drone with a small gift to you. It would be one of those ‘look out your window’ moments and you can just see his cutesy little drone floating with a box hanging under it. “Just something to let you know I’m always thinking about you.”

[stealinghero]

Hello!can I get a scenario of jigen x hacker reader where the reader wants to be with jigen romantically but jigen thinks he's to old for but he obviously is in love with her and everyone knows it. XD I would love to see how you would write how this turns out!

Well, this turned out interesting. ô_O  Jigen would never let another man hurt his s/o but he’s so freaking stubborn!!

“What are you doing?”

“You wouldn’t get it.”

“Thought so.”

With a sigh he let himself fall on the couch behind you, eyes on the screen before you, his knees next to your shoulders as you were sitting on the floor. The clinking of ice told you he had gotten himself a drink.

“Don’t I get something?” you asked him.

He just leaned forward and offered his glass to him, filled with some amber liquor.  

“Scotch?”

“Whiskey.”

You shook your head. This stuff was way too hard for you. And you still remembered the last time you had tried to keep up drinking with the men.

He nudged your shoulder with his glass and got up when you held it in your hands. Murmuring something about bratty kids he went to the kitchen to get you a coke.

“What are you pouting about, Jigen? I could get it myself, you know?”

“Shut it.”

 Lupin looked up from the newspaper, grinning a bit.

“You get so defensive around her.”

“I’ll kill you.”

“You won’t. And you honestly need to tell her.”

“What? That I’m a creep that likes young girls?”

“She’s 21, you know?”

“I’m 43.”

“She likes you.”

“She likes everyone.”

“You love her.”

“Say that again and I will hurt you, Arsène.”

“Defensive,” the thief said again and got up to leave the kitchen. On his way out he patted your head, knowing that you had listened to the whole talk.

 “Here.” The can was ice cold when he gave it to you a few minutes later, grabbing his drink from you, sitting down behind you again.

“I don’t like everyone,” you said in a small voice, barely audible, but he nevertheless had heard it. You knew from his coughing as he had chocked on his drink.

“You are grinning like an idiot at every person you meet,” he reminded you between coughs.

You laughed at this reply and let your head rest on his knee.

“I do. But it’s not everyone I risk my life for.”

“Why are we talking about that?”

“Lupin is right.”

He snorted and lit a cigarette.

“Lupin is an idiot,” he told you, letting his head fall on the backrest of the couch, exhaling a small toxic cloud of smoke.

“I like you.”

“You don’t.”

With a click your Laptop was closed and you fully turned around to face the man.

“Should I offer a blowjob to make you believe me?”

“It would be a start.”

Without a second thought, you reached between his legs. His hands closed around your wrists and pulled you up on him.

“Stop that.”

Your head rested right below his chin, your body on yours. You straddled him to make this position comfortable.

“We could fuck right now,” you teased him, wiggling your hips, a bit surprised that you didn’t feel a thing under you.

“I’m not fucking a kid.”

“I am an adult!” you objected.

Finally he lifted his head and shoved you a bit away from him so that he could see your face. His blue eyes were filled with mixed emotions.

“I wish I could. But you are 21. We’re 22 years apart. I could be your bloody father!” His voice was calm but you could see the sadness in every motion of his face. You wanted to make him smile.

“So, are you implying, I should call you daddy?” you joked.

His hands wandered up your arms, a hand closed around your throat, gently but still a silent threat.

“I would prefer you let this matter rest and get yourself a boyfriend your age,” he told you before he just shoved you from his lap, standing up and nipping on his drink.

“Get a good fuck and it will clear your head.”

Shaking your head you watched him defiantly.

“I don’t want any other man.”

“Then get a woman!” he shouted aggravated from your teasing.

“I want you.”

He didn’t reply. He just stood there, looking down on you with a poker face you were unable to read.

“I am too old,” he finally told you before leaving the room.

 “Look!!”

The next morning you exposed the tattoo of a small butterfly on your wrist. You had gotten it the night before.

“So cute!! Jigen, look!” Lupin was all over you, turning your wrist here and there to admire it in the sunlight.

The gunman got up and left the kitchen, leaving you two baffled.

“What’s gotten into him?”

“I told him I like him yesterday. Since then he didn’t look at me or even talked to me.”

Lupin laughed.

“It’s hard on him.”

“I straddled him and there was no reaction!” you told him with a small blush. You had to talk to someone about it. The thief watched you in astonishment.

“And what did he do?”

“He shoved me away.”

“Did he ever place a hand on your throat?”

How did he know that? You nodded, making him laugh more.

“He wants you so badly!!” he told you between to fits of laughter.

“Thank you for telling me. But how can I get him to admit it?”

A thought crossed Lupin’s mind. You could see it in his eyes as an idea formed in his head and he grew silent. He whistled and grinned as he had worked it out completely, his eyes flitting to something behind you.

Suddenly he pulled you close and kissed you.

“Trust me,” he whispered, letting his hands glide over your arms, giving you goosebumps. He raised your hand to kiss your still hurting tattooed wrist, licking over the wounds.

“I want you so badly,” he moaned against your skin, pulling you into his lap, grinding his hips on yours. You trusted him. But this?

His fingers travelled over your shirt, pulling it up, revealing your body in front of him. A sharp pain let you yelp as he dug his fingernails into your skin. He bit your neck to stifle a loud moan as if he was getting off by your pain.

A click next to your head let you turn your attention to your surroundings.

“Hands off of her.”

Lupin’s eyes were dark with lust and desire as he looked up the barrel of Jigen’s Combat Magnum.

“You don’t want her. I do.” Without blinking he raked his nails down your back, leaving bloody scratches, making you whine and cry out in pain.

The barrel was pressed against his forehead and you could hear Jigen’s strained breathing.

“Leave your dirty paws off of her,” he ordered, making Lupin grin and raise his hands.

You used this chance to get off of his lap and catch your shirt.

“You’ll stay like that.”

You blushed as you stared at Jigen. Had he just commanded you to stay half naked?!

“So you do like her,” Lupin stated with a purr.

Blood stained the floor as Jigen hit him across the face with the gun.

“Shithead.”

The Magnum cluttered uselessly on the table as Jigen made his way to you.

“You belong to me. Are we clear, kid?!”

You nodded, unsure if you should be happy about the way he had strained the word kid. But as his lips crashed on yours and he placed his hands on your back, rubbing the scratches gently, you knew he had claimed you to be more than just a friend despite his words.

[vagrantblvrd]

Because reasons I was talking to a friend about ridic phone apps they love? And they reminded me about the one that had a “thumb kiss” feature for couples?

And I was immediately like oh, no, because it gave me Ideas?

Freewood in which Gavin and Ryan are sekritly!married or whatever and Ryan’s always off doing Vagabond things before/after he joins the crew, right?

And one of the times he’s in town Gavin ~borrows his phone to install an app, right? Maybe some ridiculous app from the app store or something he whipped up as a side project.

And of course - of course - it’s got that “thumb kiss” feature because cheesy mcheese, you know?

Poor Ryan has no idea his phone has been ~tainted with this ridiculousness until he’s out of town on a job or whatever and gets this odd notification?

First thought is that he’s been hacked. Second thought is Gavin’s done something to his phone. Third thought is a combination of the first two thoughts because Gavin.

He taps on the notification and that opens the sekritly installed app Gavin put on his phone and this little prompt to return the “thumb kiss”.

Ryan just staring at the damn thing like what the hell is this? While he’s trying to make sense of Gavin’s nonsense this time he gets another notification meaning Gavin’s totally aware he’s on his phone right being all ??? and Ryan.

He sighs, because this little dork, right? And he returns Gavin’s little thumb kiss or whatever the hell he’s calling it and can just imagine the stupid little giggle of his.

And then Gavin texts him this stirng of hear emojis and another thumb kiss notification pops up and Ryan is just *fond sigh* because whate even is this ridiculousness?

After that he gets a thumb kiss at least once a day and it’s less ridiculous to return it. (The real kicker though, is when he starts sending thumb kisses to Gavin first. Like. Random moments through the day and all that. Out of town on a job or something and he’s feeling homesick and remembers the dumb app of Gavin’s and such.)

OR.

Jeremwood Battle Buddies where after they leave their old agency/fake their deaths depending on the AU and the terms they leave they decide to split up for a bit?

Maybe to throw anyone off their trails if they left on bad terms and have this Plan to meet up again after a year or however long?

Until then they’re building up new identities for themselves and so on and one/both of them find out about this dumb app for couples in long-distance relationships?

Or maybe they know this hacker - Gavin or Matt who codes it for them or one/both of them code it themselves, the specifics are all *hand wavy* - that they use to keep in touch.

I kind of love dorky nerdface Battle Buddy Ryan creating this app and being all, “Look, I kow we have this Plan, Jeremy. But also thumb kisses?”

If they’re together before leaving the agency it’s a way to keep in touch and be adorable?

If they’re not it can tie in to the mutual pining they’re doing?

Initial plan is NOT to become criminals. (That plan, of course, does not last long. Because Reasons.)

But they need a way to keep in touch in case something goes wrong and they can’t risk being found out and so on. It’s the best way to do it, really!

What better way to get away with hiding in plain sight and such than by pretending to be a couple in a long-distance relationship who are sickingly adorable?

No one would think twice about the app on their phone that lets them send thumb kisses - aside from the well, okay then, thought when they first find out about it?

Because it’s kind of sweet, really.

And they can get away with keeping in touch via thumb kisses without being suspicious - daily check-ins and so on to let the other know things are going As Planned. (When too much time goes by without a thumb kiss check-in they know something has gone Terribly Wrong, and just imagine having to explain that to someone they go to for help? XD)

In the mutual!pining scenario there’s the Oh, if only moment where they wish the thumb kisses were real. (At the time it’s a useful tool/asset to make sure the other is okay? But they have the, I wish he knew I meant that thumb kiss!!1! emotional moment that sounds totes ridiculous out of context, because it makes me laugh like a lunatic thinking about it.)

(Whichever scenario the app is super!secure so there are no worries of being tracked down/found through them - unless that becomes a Plot Point in which that exact thing happens and the one who hasn’t been compromised is drawn out of hiding/whatever to rescue their damsel in distress SO from the baddies and so on.)

Just like.

Either/any other scenario imagine someone noticing the Stoic and Spooky Vagabond in full Vagabond gear stopping to send his SO a thumb kiss and being all ??? because what even is this?????

On a stakeout or something and next to them there’s this buzz/notification noise and the Vagabond pulls his phone out. The person he’s with glances over and sees some ridiculously cutesy app with little hearts and all that because it’s all-over cartoony cute/adorable/ridiculous because it’s for the Vagabond to have and therefore must go against all of his aesthetics okay. (For the lulz.)

Maybe the Vagabond notices their stakeout partner noticing what he’s doing and makes eye contact with them as he sends his thumb kiss.

Probably some cute little noise to go with it too, you know. Either a *smooch* sound effect or little chime or something totes adorable/potentially embarassing if heard by anyone ever?

And it’s like.

Vagabond knowing no one would believe his stakeout partner if they told someone about it because yeah, right, like the Vagabond would have something like that on his phone. Nice one, asshole. >:(

[nocturnalsleuth]

RISE OF THE TMNT CHARACTERS W/ DIGIMON PARTNERS, GO!!!

FOUND THE SKETCHBOOK I BOUGHT AND WROTE THESE DOWN IN THE OTHER DAY SO HERE’S A POST WITH THEIR PARTNERS AND SOME DIGIVOLUTIONS

Raph - Pandamon < BanchoLeomon (w/ Leo) - Big, soft, and packs a punch, donned in a red bandanna! Nice fit for Raph! (THOUGH IT WAS A TOSS UP BETWEEN MONZAEMON AND PANDAMON, BCUZ HE IS A HUGE SOFTIE IN RISE)

Leon - Leomon < GrapLeomon < BanchoLeomon (w/ Raph) - Okay so I was stuck on what to give Leon, definitely something with a sentient sword, and my sister said something like “go with Leomon lmao, the pun” to which i said “YOU GODDAMN GENIUS”, and also it’s digivolution can DNA Digivolve with Pandamon????? making it extremely perfect??????

Mikey - Kamemon < Kappamon < DJKappamon (w/ Donnie) - I had to give Mikey Kappamon because of this one fic I read quq and DJKappamon is kind of like a stronger Kappamon but with cool DJ tech attacks!!!

Donnie - Shelldmon < Datamon < DJKappamon  (w/ Mikey) - Shelldon gains sentience and becomes a Digimon partner! I love AI developing sentience plots, and maybe this could explore a fun miniarc on the consequences of replicating life to fulfill ego?? idk.

April - Mayhemon < Mysticmon < KelpiDramon (w/ Sunita) - I was torn between making Mayhem a Digimon or giving her a different partner, but I think for this AU Mayhemon would be a good fit!! I wanted to give April and Sunita’s DNA digivolution a Dramon name, but also wanted it to be like a cool goopy monster, so Kelpie/Dragon cross time!!!

Sunita - Syakomon < Ranamon < KelpiDramon (w/ April) - Kind of a metaphor for how she wanted to be normal before meeting April, kind of wanted to give her a cute gooey partner.

Hueso - BlueMeramon < SkullMeramon - Skull man needs a mon that can both cook and kick unwanted customers out! I just like the idea of blue fire digimon cooking but like can u imagine SkullMeramon dicing carrots??? u go u funky little fire man

Todd - Swanmon - ULTIMATE CARETAKER DUO I DON’T HAVE TO JUSTIFY THIS THEY’RE PERFECT

Splinter - SuperStarmon < Gankoomon - Gankoomon just felt like a really good fit for Lou Jitsu, slightly more serious and levelheaded, a good grounding force for this action star!

Piebald - Swimmon < Tylomon X - Kind of a metaphor for what happened to her quq

Draxum - Arcadiamon - Scientist man obsessed with mutation and eradicating the human species. Arcadiamon Time.

Big Mama - Dokugumon < Arachnemon - I just think the big scary spider ladies with human forms should be partners.

Foot Lieutenant - Omekamon < Tekkamon < Shredmon (w/ Foot Brute and Draxum) < Shreddermon - Shredmon is like a cross between a DNA digivolution and a Matrix digivolution with the Dark Armour present, and Shreddermon is what happens when one of the partner’s or the Matrix-digivolver ends the digivolution (hence Draxum still getting raisinified)

Foot Brute - WarMonzaemon < Shredmon (w/ Foot Lieutenant and Draxum) < Shreddermon - Foot Brute and Raph have some interesting parallels going on, so I think him having the terrifying bear partner makes sense.

Foot Recruit - Huckmon < BaoHuckmon < DarkKnightmon - Dedicated student willing to do anything for her superiors, with a touch of striking out on her own once she feels she’s ready. Huckmon.

Kendra - Monodramon < Devidramon < Mephistomon - If you think I’m not giving a purple dragon to the leader of a group called THE PURPLE DRAGONS WELL U’D BE DEAD WRONG BUDDY-O!!! Also considering Mephistomon’s skill in strategy and tactics I think they’re a good fit!!

Jeremy - Gururumon < MachGaogamon - Wanted one of the to have a partner that would play off of Jase’s fear of dogs XD

Jase - Solarmon < Guardomon (Gold) - I figured a team of hacker’s needs a good firewall!!!

Meat Sweats - EbiBurgamon < Ebidramon - Cook turned terrifying!! No further explanation needed!!

Repo Mantis - Hagurumon < Sicklemon (purple Snimon variant) - Excellent partner for a junkyard!! Easily able to pick out re-sellable parts!!

Hypno - Tsukaimon < Witchmon - Tsukaimon often acts like a familiar for other digimon, so why not a magic assistant for a magician! As Witchmon they butt heads a bit more, but still get along excellently!!

Ghost Bear - Penguinmon < Frigimon - Okay I was actually pretty torn between Frigimon and Hyogamon, but I thought Frigimon’s kind Mom personality was a fun match-up for this tough guy

Sando Brothers - Crabmon/Crabmon < Shellmon/MoriShellmon - I was torn between giving them Numemon/Sukamon variants, but then I remembered Shellmon! Given that these guys have only showed up a couple times and don’t have much personality yet, their partners were sort of picked to match!

Warren Stone - Puttimon < Tokomon X < Sistermon Blanc - Okay I know this is like way out of left field but I really like the idea of him being partnered to something tiny and cute/useless most of the time and then it digivolves and it’s kind of a wtf moment for anyone that’s there, including Warren!

[jczala]

Datastorm December: Day 06

Discussion Prompt: 

↳ Random Datastorm Headcanon.  

I’ve been itching to do a discussion prompt for a while now, so I figured it’s the best time to do it. I’ve had a lot of headcanons stored up in my brain, so here goes…

Ai being HIGHKEY Datastormshipper

Ai being a peeping tom when they’re together, though there are times he’d make excuses so he can leave them alone.

Ai trying to pair them up at every opportunity and being subtle about it.

Ai, Spectre, and almost everyone in their circle have a separate group chat where they update each other regarding Ryoken and Yusaku’s relationship. Mostly filled with lots of sighing emojis due to the couple’s somewhat no-nonsense nature. They can be so dense XD

Ai has a backup storage of all the photos and videos he took of Yusaku, especially in his normal day-to-day setting, and Ryoken has access to all of it.

Likewise, Ai also has photos and videos of their romantic rendezvous (both IRL and VR mode). He once posted a picture of Revolver kissing Playmaker, and the LIKES skyrocketed off the charts. His program was at risk of being dismantled by two very excellent hackers after that.

Everyone had bets on them. Ai and Spectre won every single one.

Ai crying at Ryoken and Yusaku’s wedding. XD

 Ryoken’s Side

Ryoken is incredibly perceptive. He notices a lot of things. Like when Yusaku hasn’t slept enough because of nightmares and when he’s feeling sick. He notices when he’s in a good mood and when he’s pissed off. Ryoken is always paying attention to him that Yusaku doesn’t have to say anything.

Ryoken is extremely organized. He’s the type of person who gets the job done, leaves his desk clean, go home and enjoy peace and quiet. He gets mildly alarmed by the clutter that is Yusaku’s workspace or his bedroom for that matter. Good thing he has Roboppi to help him out.

Being raised by scientists, Ryoken received an extensive education in many fields of study and language. He often helps Yusaku with his homework.

Since he pays so much attention to details, Ryoken is quite a gift-giver. He notices what Yusaku likes and buy things for him no matter the price.

Ryoken likes touching Yusaku and uses every chance he gets to do so. In bed, he likes to cuddle with Yusaku. It makes him feel good that Yusaku is comfortable with him.

Ryoken is very protective of Yusaku. He can be a bit possessive too. Never ever make him jealous.

Ryoken has a flair for magic tricks, and often uses it as an excuse to touch Yusaku.

Since he’s naturally good-looking, Ryoken gets scouted a lot by modeling agencies and the girls would just swoon whenever he shows up at Yusaku’s school. There was that time when Kusanagi had him help out at Café Nagi, and Yusaku swore the increase of female customers that day was crazy. In spite of the attention he gets from girls, Ryoken assures Yusaku that he only has eyes for him.

Ryoken only drops the alpha leader attitude when he’s alone with Yusaku.

It doesn’t matter how busy he is at work, Ryoken will always make time on weekends for Yusaku.

 Yusaku’s Side

Yusaku loves sleeping on Ryoken’s chest because he likes to hear the sound of his heart. Something he’ll never admit out loud.

Yusaku would often tell Kusanagi that he’s practicing cooking so he doesn’t have to depend on him. He’s just actually cooking for Ryoken.

Yusaku enjoys it when Ryoken touches his hair. So, whenever Ryoken plays with strands of his hair and massages his scalp, it immediately calms him down.

Yusaku actually gets shy whenever Ryoken does romantic things with him. It doesn’t help that Ryoken is such a smooth talker.

Because of the incident, he doesn’t like any form of physical contact with anyone. It took him a while to get comfortable with Ryoken and he realized that he’s actually sensitive when he’s being touched. His ears are also his weakness, so every time Ryoken talks so close to his ear, he’ll just melt.

On that note, Yusaku is so, so weak to Ryoken’s voice, especially when Ryoken talks to him huskily. It just makes his heart skip.

Yusaku’s not so deadpan anymore. He smiles more nowadays because of Ryoken. He also blushes a lot too around him. XD

As much as he trusts Ryoken, Yusaku feels insecure when girls fawn over him.

Seeing Ryoken in their school’s uniform literally made Yusaku freeze like freakin’ Black Panther when he saw the love of his life. It’s just the same uniform, but damn hell, did Ryoken look good in it. How is that fair?!

Yusaku has a feminine face, much to his chagrin, and he can dress up like a girl naturally. When he lost a bet with Spectre, he was forced to wear a kimono and hair extensions. But that was actually Spectre just setting him up for a Festival Date with Ryoken. And Ryoken was very pleased with what he saw.

 As a Couple

They never told anyone when they got together. Everyone only found out when Ryoken wiped a ketchup stain from the corner of Yusaku’s lips and licked it clean off his finger. Kusanagi choked on his coffee.

It took them a while to get used to calling each other by names. It was Yusaku who initiated it.

Their first date was on a cold day, and knowing how meticulous Ryoken is, Yusaku arrived at the meet-up place an hour early just in case. When Ryoken got there at the appointed time, he quickly noticed Yusaku’s flushed cheeks and ears—an indication that he’s been waiting outside for quite a while now. He can’t help but look at Yusaku tenderly and wrapped his own scarf around Yusaku.

Upon Yusaku’s graduation, Ryoken proposes the idea of living together.

Yusaku always had trouble sleeping, and ever since he and Ryoken got together, he’s able to sleep soundly.

Yusaku gets spoiled by Ryoken a lot even though he doesn’t mean to. Being rich affords Ryoken to do so anyway.

On days Yusaku sleeps in, Ryoken secretly takes pictures of his sleeping face. He thinks it’s cute.

Ryoken likes to give Yusaku small kisses from time to time, often privately.

Yusaku pretends he hates cuddling, but he actually loves it. Ryoken enjoys it when Yusaku falls asleep in his arms.

Whenever Ryoken gets engrossed with work, he often forgets to eat, and because of that Yusaku makes it his job to check up on him. He’ll bring him food or coffee, and sometimes he’ll just drag him to bed and make him rest.

Free time? Duel, of course! Speed Duel, Master Duel, you name it. However, on some days, they’d just duel in the comforts of their living room. No Duel Disks, no VR, just regular old-fashioned dueling.  Both of them are really competitive, though.

For @datastorm-december​ 💖

[auroraphilealis]

Can you please recommend me some good slow burn fics and/or chaptered fics. Thanks in advance xx

Are you READY?

Cause I have so many recommendations

Under the cut cause I went crazy

Give Me A Try @danfanciesphil - Dan, a bartender at ‘Habenero’, Brighton’s hottest gay club, has been obsessed with AmazingPhil, the openly gay Instagram model for a long time. In all the fantasy meet-cute scenarios Dan has imagined for he and his semi-celeb crush, none of them involved him being at work, being soaked in various liquids, or being halfway through a Saturday night hell-shift. Sometimes, life doesn’t wait around for your plans.

Ships that Pass in the Night @agingphangirl - Dan and Phil are YouTubers. The catch? They’ve never met, and Phil doesn’t want them to.

The Meaning of Love @phandomsub - Phil Lester is an intern at the British Society of the Prevention of Cruelty to Neko – an organisation that focuses on rescuing abandoned or mistreated neko and rehabilitating them for re-adoption. He can’t say he fully agrees with the way many neko are treated, but in a world where they have no rights Phil has to agree that being someone’s pet is the best option for them. Then neko #504 is brought into the shelter and Phil finally realises just how alike humans and neko are. 

Here By My Side (A New Color to Paint the World)  - So one day, Phil walks in on Dan wearing a dress. And after a very confusing discussion, it comes out that Dan enjoys wearing girl’s clothing in private. Phil lets it be known that he’d be fine if Dan wore it around him and slowly, Dan starts opening up and letting Phil into his private world. But what Phil doesn’t expect is to start seeing Dan in a whole new way.

breathe and ill breathe (and im in love with you)  - A series of one-shots in which we explore various kinks. Said chapters will include biting, dirty talk, blindfolds, rimming, orgasm control/orgasm denial, spanking and scratching, orders and obeying, handcuffs and leg cuffs, breath play, and wax play.

Stirring in Love - @andthenshesaid-write When Phil applied to be a contestant on the Great British Bake Off he didn’t even expect to make the long-list, let alone make it into the actual tent. But make it he does and there he meets Dan, a baker unlike Phil in every possible way. After a rocky start, Phil realises that maybe he can learn some things from Dan after all, and the biggest things have nothing to do with baking.This fic was nominated for the Phanfic Awards 2016 Best of the Best!

A Map of My Heart and Mind - Dan and Phil get drunk and wake up married in Vegas, the day after Dan’s 25th birthday. Dan thinks they could just get it annulled but Dan knows what marriage means to Phil, how important it is, and he wonders if they can just fake it for a year so it’s not a total waste and then divorce. Of course, a year is a long time to pretend to be married and things can always change…

Emergency Substitute @parentaladvisorybullshitcontent - “You could always charm Phil for us,” Jack suggests. “Throw him off his game.”“Right, yeah,” Dan says sarcastically. “Midway through the match I’ll just Summon his broom to me and he’ll fall off and then Gryffindor’ll automatically win.”“I didn’t mean that kind of charm,” Jack says, under his breath.In which Dan is roped into playing Quidditch when all he really wants is a quiet life. And for Phil to never leave Hogwarts.

Road to Acceptance Series @anerdwithakoreanhaircut - Dan never thought alcohol could bring anything but misery into his life, and…well, he was kind of right; the headache was painful and the memories of how he spent his 18th birthday were gone. He manages to break into someone else’s home. But it’s because of the alcohol he meets Phil, who impacts his life in more ways than one.

If You Think you Know Me @ineverhadmyinternetphase - Fiction. Phil’s a police Sergeant. He’s been itching to get promoted to Inspector for ages, but to do so, he needs to crack his biggest case - famed internet hacker the Howler. Phil’s been after him for years, but he’d never managed to get even a hint towards his identity. When he meets a hot stranger in a bar one night, Phil thinks his luck might just be turning up. But maybe getting close to this particular stranger isn’t the best idea.

Everything You Never Wanted - Phil is an omega, he’s spent nearly his entire life going to Eastbrook, an omega only school. When his parents make the decision to transfer him into an alpha,beta,omega school his whole life is turned upside down. Especially when he meets Dan Howell, an alpha who can’t seem to stand him. No matter how hard the two try to avoid each other the universe seems to keep pulling them together.

Our Threadbare Lies @ramonaspeaks - Dan is eighteen years old and newly single. He’s ready to come out to his family but he thinks it would be a hell of a lot easier if he had a boyfriend to help him through it.

Taking Every Chance I’ve Got - All Dan wanted was to get drunk, really. Have a good time, meet a few new people. He didn’t really think about getting involved with someone as dangerous as Phil Lester (someone as cold, as pale and, well, as not alive), and he definitely didn’t think that one trip out to a bar would change his life forever.

Behind Closed Doors - Based very loosely on ‘A Little Princess’ and ‘David Copperfield’14 year old Dan Howell is sent away to boarding school leaving behind his abusive stepfather and incredibly ill mother. 17 year old Phil Lester is the school’s jack-of-all-trades who works his hardest under harsh circumstances to avoid the workhouse. The two boys meet and become close friends knowing they have to stick together if they are to survive the trials that lay ahead of them.

read between the lines (i will if you will) @phanbliss - Phil ^_^ (5:31 PM)Dan?danisNOTonfire xD i swear im really not. come check. (5:31 PM)yeah?Phil ^_^ (5:32 PM)I think I'm in love with youI justI can't wait to meet you--Skype conversations between Dan and Phil, leading up to their first meeting. 2009!Phan. Prepare for fluff.

First Impressions (Perhaps I Was Wrong) @phanbliss - Phil Lester goes back to university for his third year, expecting to live in the dorms with his childhood best friend PJ. That's how it's been for the past years, after all. However, due to a mistake of some sort, he finds himself with a new roommate to spend the semester with.Daniel Howell, three years his junior, has rich brown eyes, a laptop to hide them behind, and not more than two words to spare in Phil's direction. Phil is no fortune teller, but he foresees the upcoming months will be filled with a whole lot of awkward silence.Unless, of course, Dan proves him wrong...Could one little mistake lead to something entirely life-changing? Perhaps it could. After all, nearly everything changes when Phil meets Dan.-Excerpt: Dan's hair is soft against Phil's cheek, and his presence - gentle against his heart.Winner of Best Slow Burn in the Phanfic Awards 2016!

Reflections of the Heart - “Being told to dress up in a dinosaur onesie and have cereal catapulted at your face is a little odd. Waking up to find that you and your best friend have switched bodies? That’s fucking bizarre.”(Or, the multi-chaptered, slightly smutty bodyswap fic that no one asked for. Featuring whiny/annoying!Dan, sassy/beguiling!Phil, unintentional innuendos, intentional innuendos, unnecessary kitchen supplies, and just a pinch of magic).

Love Yourself @imnotinclinedtomaturity - A lot of things about Dan's life are pretty great. He gets to make the music he wants, he's got a great fanbase, and his manager is his best friend. A few things about his life suck a bit more. He's currently lacking inspiration, he's rather lonely, and he's stuck in a rut.Dan's been going to the same coffee shop for years. It's quiet, it's quaint, it's near his home. Most importantly: none of the employees give a shit that's he a world-famous singer. Things change when he meets the new barista.

In My Way @ineverhadmyinternetphase - Daniel Howell is 21 and Britain’s newest star. He’s just been cast in the much-anticipated film adaption of Last Man Standing, the popular teen fantasy novel with a huge fanbase hanging off his every tweet. In other words, Dan has made it big.Phil Lester couldn’t care less. He’s a stressed out PHD student working part time at a bookshop while he struggles to get into post-production. He’s 26 and still lives in a tiny flat on the fifth floor of a building with a lift more broken than it is in use. He loves books, but he thinks big film adaptions screw with the plot too much.Needless to say, Phil is less than impressed when Last Man Standing is getting filmed in his hometown. And he certainly doesn’t want anything to do with obnoxious, arrogant, so irritatingly perfect leading actor Daniel Howell.

Let Me Down Gently @ineverhadmyinternetphase - AU in which Dan is (briefly) a lawyer, until he gets fired and kicked out by his girlfriend. Wandering alone at night looking for a place to stay, he happens across a slightly strange man who introduces himself as Phil and who owns a B&B. Without much choice, Dan takes up the offer to stay there, and quickly grows to have a certain fondness for Phil. There’s only one problem: Phil runs the B&B with his long-term partner Alex.

jump a lil higher @snsknene - Dan co-hosts The Breakfast Show. Phil's his new producer. They fall in love, assisted by a bunch of romcom tropes I refuse to apologise for.

danandphilKINKS @snsknene - "I've got mine!" Dan said, waving it triumphantly. Phil knew this was serious, then, because a) he hadn't procrastinated on it at all, and b) it was barely legible: he'd handwritten it.Or: Dan and Phil have a bucket list. Except with less seeing the Great Wall of China and more Googling how to wash enema.

Strangers @waveydnp - dan is new to london and living in a mostly empty flat, desperate to forget the mistakes of his past. he's all alone -- until one day he gets a piece of mail addressed to someone in the neighbouring flat, one mr. philip lester. he can't exactly not return it, can he?

a match and a fuse @waveydnp - Phil is twenty six years old and stuck in a dead end life. He works at Starbucks and may or may not be carrying a torch for his best friend of eight years. He doesn't know who he is or what he wants--or how to go about figuring it out.That all starts to change when he happens upon the resume of a certain law school grad named Daniel.

[ask-svt-hearteu]

Mafia! Woozi

Anon requested: “ since it’s our jihoonie’s birthday today, can i request a mafia!au for out vobo? hehe i just saw that requests are open & i got rly excited !! 💗💗 — daydreaming anon (hbd woozi i love you sO MUCH) “

Word Count: 3679

you never thought you’d be here 

3:58am on a Saturday in one of the most heavily protected buildings in the entire city 

hooking up your sad $535 laptop and praying to whoever runs the universe 

that you’ll be able to go home and eat breakfast in time

as is the life of a hacker

a professional top-of-the-line hacker for hire

too bad the government hasn’t noticed your talent yet

or you would be working for the good guys

but you’re working for whoever helps pay the rent now

and if you take down some corrupt businesses while you’re working for the mob

who cares

that’s enough vigilante justice for you

honestly you’d think that one of the most powerful companies in the city would know better than to have such weak protection for their systems

you shake your head as you smirk and carefully unplug your laptop 

done 

easiest $30,000 dollars of your life 

the company had been known to “donate” a percentage of their revenue back into the city 

things like feeding and housing the homeless 

or ensuring kids go to school and aren’t on the streets 

but in reality they were pocketing all of it 

and come morning 

you would have just exposed their asses 

climbing back out the vent you came through 

you shouldered the backpack with your laptop 

and crawled until you reached the building’s service entrance 

dropping down you were fully intending to walk casually straight out the building 

until you felt your arm jerk as you were roughly pulled behind a wall 

“What the fu-“ 

the person who did it covered your mouth roughly 

and your eyes widened as you saw one of the guards walk by 

you silently cursed at yourself for not monitoring the CCTV system 

you had assumed hacking into it was fine 

but you forgot to check the guard’s positioning 

after he passed you turned back to the person who had just saved your ass 

“Thanks I guess.” 

he didn’t say anything but gave you a sideways glance and shrugged as he pulled out a definitely more expensive and way better laptop than yours 

as he connected it to one of the computers in the room 

“Who are you btw?” You asked eyeing him suspiciously 

he smirked

“What’s it to you?” he replied quietly 

it almost sounded like he was teasing you 

“Sorry if you got offended at me trying to be polite.” You scoff annoyed 

who was this guy? 

he had jet black hair 

and was not super tall from what you could see 

but when he turned back to look at you 

your breath caught in your throat 

“You broke into a high security building to clumsily hack into a system and expose their lies, I don’t think manners are our top priority right now.” he answered looking straight into your eyes

you stared blankly in shock 

“How did you...?” how did he know?

“Regardless I’m here to undo it.” 

you watched as he clicked shut his laptop and faced you 

“The fuck! I’m getting paid, what am I supposed to tell my client?” you said 

he smirked again as he packed up his laptop 

“There are better ways to expose this company.” 

and with that he disappeared 

like legit 

gone poof 

he walked found his escape route before you even had time to process what he meant

you blinked and he was gone 

when you finally returned to your apartment when the sun came up 

and clicked on the tv 

the news was playing 

“-donates half of their entire yearly revenue to creating shelters for the homeless...” 

your jaw dropped 

while you had wanted to expose to the media this company’s lies 

whoever that guy was last night 

had transferred over half of the entire company’s revenue 

in the five minutes he had spent saving you from lifetime in prison 

who the fuck was he? 

 his name was Lee Jihoon 

and honestly did he ever think he’d have to deal with other hackers even close to his caliber? 

nope 

but you had broken through into the company’s servers in record times 

he was intrigued 

and more than a bit competitive 

“Jeonghan, you think you could look up someone for me?” he asked walking into Svt’s main meeting room

Jeonghan was hunched over some papers planning the next job no doubt

without looking up, Jeonghan said

“That’s like asking if I like taking naps Jihoon, who do you think I am? All I need is a name-” 

“I don’t have her name yet.” 

Jeonghan raised an eyebrow swiveling in his chair to face Jihoon 

his blue prints and detailed plans fluttering at the sudden movement 

“Her?” Jeonghan questioned, teasing smile on his lips  

“I can’t work with you.” Jihoon rolled his eyes while walking off to find Seungcheol 

“WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘HER’?!?!?” Jeonghan yelled after him smiling 

Jihoon had joined Seungcheol’s team a while ago 

one of the original members 

but the others didn’t really know about him at first 

because he kept to himself 

usually tinkering with gadgets in his own office in the Svt complex 

overlooking the city 

overlooking their territory 

he also may have held up a gun to Soonyoung’s head when Soonyoung tried to touch him 

jokingly 

or so everyone would like to think XD 

one time Seungkwan had lost a bet to the others 

and was dared to go into Jihoon’s office

-just to try to learn more about this teammate they didn’t see much of 

but they got caught

and Seungcheol was scolding them until Jihoon walked out and told them to just order dinner and call it done 

and tbh although this cold mafia hacker didn’t easily trust people 

that one night where he got to sit down with the whole gang for a meal finally 

and although he would never admit it 

after being around the whole gang for years 

he trusted them with his life 

one of the best hackers hands down 

sometimes jokingly gets called the cyber shadow 

bc he’s Svt’s hidden member 

doesn’t go out in the field for most missions 

but has a hand in planning, masterminding, and orchestrating the whole thing 

didn’t like going out for any jobs anyway

that is until he had the proper motivation to

you quietly slunk through the security room 

attaching your USB to the main computer 

uploading the code that would shut off alarms for an hour or until you turned it back on 

this job was easy

stop the security system long enough to allow your client to rob the facility 

once the system was down you called the client 

“Yea the systems are down.” 

and you leaned back in your chair to monitor the camera systems as your client gang snuck into the facility 

“Honestly thought you’d be some social justice warrior but it looks like you’re in this for money.” 

you nearly fell out of the chair at the sound of that voice 

one you’d never forget 

“You!” You pointed at the guy you met that night 

he had entered the security room quietly behind you and was leaning against the wall

“Yep it’s me.” He smirked setting down a bag 

his black hair tousled lightly and hidden behind his hoodie 

he might be considered cute or good looking maybe 

ahem even though he’s totally not your type 

“I mean I do what I do for money too, but I’m surprised you play dirty also.” He laughed taking out a laptop 

“What are you doing here?” You say cutting straight to the point 

“While you’re helping this small gang live for another day, I’m helping kings grow an empire.” 

his smirk was really starting to make your heart flutter annoy you 

“and so you’re here because...?” you ask rolling your eyes 

“There’s access to the servers from this security room since the facility houses both companies.” 

you snort 

“You’re trying to hack the credit loan company next door?” You try to hold back giggles 

what kind of kings, please you think sarcastically 

here you were stealing hundreds of thousands of dollars and he was trying to hack a credit loan company 

“Information is much more valuable than money sometimes, a big drug smuggler wired money through this place and I want to know how much.” He shrugs 

“Speaking of information...” he says turning to walk right up to your chair  

you’re taken back as he walks right up in your face 

“What’s your name?” He asks placing a hand on either side of your chair 

his weight being balanced on his hands resting on the arm rests of your chair 

his eyes inches from yours 

“I don’t kiss and tell.” you say not backing down from his stare 

it was hard breathing with him so close 

he smiled 

“Let’s trade info then.” He laughed, “a name for a name.” 

“How can I trust you?” You saying tilting your head 

he steps back from you finally giving you room to breathe again 

“You can’t trust me, but I promise that I actually do keep my word... sometimes” 

you looked at him trying to decipher his words 

he looked like that joking smirk was forever an aspect of his face 

but in his eyes 

you thought you saw something genuine 

curiosity maybe 

or something else 

“Fine, my name is y/n.” You give in, “but maybe I’m lying or maybe I’m not.” 

“I’m Lee Jihoon.” He said breaking out into a smile before continuing his hacking 

at that moment your phone vibrated indicating your clients were done with the job 

Jihoon was still bent over his laptop typing away 

you thought about his adorable smirk and how it made your heart skip a beat 

and you blushed, flustered that he showed you up last time 

but this time you’d be the last one laughing 

you unhooked your USB that had been preventing the alarms from going off and ignored the warning window 

and that was when the security room’s alarms started blaring making Jihoon jump 

“Well hate to run while we were having so much fun,” you smirk, “but good luck explaining this to the cops.” 

you ran out the room right as the doors locked behind you 

as you looked back at him after getting into the car 

rather than angry he looked exasperated 

and slightly impressed maybe? 

you drove off before the police really did appear 

“SHE AHAHAHAHA SHE AHAHAHA LOCKED THE ROOM AHAHAHAHA.” Mingyu was dying on the ground laughing 

“I swear I might actually shoot you.” Jihoon said blushing 

“You have to admit she got you.” Joshua said bringing Jihoon a cup of cola and hiding a smile

“SHE FREAKING LOCKED HIM IN THE SECURITY ROOM!” Mingyu howled 

“Wow she must be something.” Jeonghan chuckled, “When was the last time you were caught off-guard, Jihoon? I can’t remember that ever happening.” 

“Luckily you got out before the cops showed.” Seungcheol smiled patting Jihoon on the back 

they were all having a tad bit too much with the situation

“She must not know who she’s messing with.” Minghao said before getting up

“So tell me her name.” Jeonghan snickered

“Y/n.” Jihoon said done with everyone

“I’ll have her file to you by midnight.” with that the gang dispersed, leaving Jihoon to wonder

what kind of person are you?

you had a lot more run-ins with “Lee Jihoon” after that night in the security room

whether you were out doing little jobs or big ones

he always seemed to know where you were

“Are you following me?” you asked him one night 

the both of you were at city hall

you were trying to get into the mayor’s financial plans, info that would sell

and he was connecting to the police line

“Why would I do that?” he retorted 

it was dark so you didn’t see him blushing

but he had indeed followed you here

he wasn’t sure what it was

but you had not only intrigued him and caught his attention

but Jeonghan had been unable to dig up anything on you

which was almost impossible

Jeonghan knew how to get anything on anyone

and so Jihoon was here to find out info the old fashion way

talking

“You seem too smart of a person to be a criminal.” he began looking over your shoulder at the laptop you were working on

“So do you.” you respond ducking out from next to him to continue working

“I’m not a genius, but I think that if you’re not the best at something, you’ll always put more effort into it.” he shrugged

you clicked your laptop shut

“Wanna go get coffee?” you said suddenly

he looked up in surprise

“What?!” 

“It’s almost 5am, and from running into you consistently these past few days, I realized I never thanked you for saving me from that guard. I’m not sorry about the security room thing though, that was funny.” you laughed, “but I’m going to go get coffee and if you want I’ll buy you a cup too, that way we’re even.”

“I don’t see how coffee makes us even.” he snorted

“Fine I’m leaving then.” you briskly turned around and started walking

you hear him jog to catch up to you and fall into step next to you

“Coffee is better than nothing i suppose.”

over a cup of coffee the two of you talked a bit

“So where did you learn how to hack?” you ask

“Are we close enough to be asking those kinds of questions?” he responded taking a sip of his coffee

“I suppose not.” you looked down disappointed 

you weren’t sure about Jihoon

you two had met under dangerous circumstances

and you didn’t know enough about the guy to suddenly start liking him

but every time his eyes met yours

or whenever you watched him swiftly hacking into something

fingers flying over the keyboard the way a pianist’s fingers played the piano

you couldn’t help the feeling of awe and curiosity 

who was he?

Jihoon coughed

“How about we start with what we do for a living?” he laughed, “I think that’s enough for now.”

so you told him a bit about being a hacker for hire

nothing really interesting

besides living 

that’s all there was to it

you were just living your life one job at a time

he sighed

“I think I understand.” he looked out the window 

“I was like that too until I found the others.” he stirred his cup before downing it

“Others?” you ask

“My friends, I guess you’d call them.” 

you pursed your lips

“Don’t you know what friends are?” you asked in return

“I don’t really trust people you know, occupational hazard.” he chuckled

you understood

people too often stab you in the back when you’re doing this kind of job

it was hard to find anyone to trust

his phone buzzed

and you watched as he picked it up

“Looks like I gotta go.” he smiled, “It was actually kind of fun to see how normal people live out of the shadows.”

you nodded in agreement

“It was also nice talking to you.” you said reaching out to shake his hand, “Hopefully our next few run-ins can be on more friendly terms.” you laugh

he reaches for your hand 

gently, as his hand takes yours

and as he pulls you closer to him

“Stay safe.” he says gently into your ear

and then he’s gone

you sit frozen in your spot at what just happened and look over at his empty cup

on the cup are nine letters scrambled up

you stare at it recalling him writing it on his cup when he was talking with you

and you realized 

it’s his number

you pick up the cup, unconsciously smiling

and go home

you don’t see him the next few nights

heck for the whole week you don’t

you half-expected him to melt out of the shadows with a smirk on his face and some teasing comment about your hacking abilities

but he wasn’t around

it was more than a bit worrying

you had his number and you were tempted to call

but could you?

you shook your head as you made your way out that night for your next job

the client had been a bit of a mystery

they called using a disposable phone which wasn’t uncommon 

except they also used voice modulation

suspicious perhaps but you were getting paid

you walked up to the address they had left

a small office building

and climbed in through a window

gently setting your things down you were about to begin when

the whole world went dark

and suddenly the smell of chloroform made the world feel dizzying as you slowly closed your eyes

when you woke up

your head hurt and everything felt upside down

but more than that

what greeted your vision first

was the appearance of a gun

pointed right at you

“You’re up.” 

the voice was rough and you felt like throwing up at the sound of it

“Yea I’m up you freaking asses, what the fuck do you want?”

“We require your services.”

“Then go through the proper channels and pay me you pricks.” you said trying to keep clam

the gun was raised 

“Is this enough payment?’ the voice said indicating the gun

“Whatever, let’s just get this done.” you took deep breaths

not that this hasn’t happened before

but you had never had a gun so close in your face

and it was terrifying to think you might not see the sun rise today

you pulled up to the desk of the room the men were in

and turned on the computer as they watched you

whoever had programmed the firewall for the servers knew what they were doing

you were nearly stumped

until you remembered something Jihoon had done that night in the security room

why did he come up in your thoughts now?

you remembered him telling you to stay safe

and looking at the guys with bullets ready to be fired at you

your eyes started tearing up

you know how these things go

as soon as you were done, you were dead

“Hurry it up.”

you opened the files on the computer and looked through some of it

a lot were mainly book stuff

how much this group was getting paid and when the latest orders for weapons were coming in

you assumed that whoever you were hacking, they must be a competing gang to the men currently holding you captive

you looked deeper into the files until you stumbled across a peculiar file

in it were names

“Yoon Jeonghan” you read to yourself

“likes napping and stealing my cola mostly, overall a good person to talk to” 

“Hong Jisoo” you read the next file

“quiet and also not quiet, good listener.” you were curious

what kind of files were these?

and then one file popped up

“Y/n L/n.” you held your breath

“likes coffee at five am in the morning”

you knew who the computer belonged to 

a bang on the door jolted you from the files

“Fuck!” the men scrambled to brace themselves as the door blew open

you took cover under the desk as you heard bullets going off and yelling

maybe this was all just a bad nightmare

you closed your eyes and silently listed off numbers

a hand gently took yours and you opened your eyes

Jihoon was there with the most adorable and relieved smile on his face

“Well, had I know you were coming to visit me today, I would have bought coffee.” he pulled you up into his arms and gently walked you out the room

“Don’t mind the guns and stuff, I’m sure you’re not all too curious about the guys that tried to kill you.” he said 

you heard an edge to his voice but didn’t look at your surroundings until he had lead you to a separate room with a couch

sitting down with you, it finally hit you

you’re not dying today

you were shaking as he gently placed his arms around you

“I’m surprised you broke through my firewall, guess I have to fix that as soon as possible.” he chuckled wrapping you up in his arms 

“The frick Jihoon.” you laughed smacking his arm, “I almost died and exposed your identity and you’re concerned about your firewall?”

“Well yea.” he smiled, “And I’m trying not to bash their heads in but Seungcheol said that would require a lot of clean up in the morning and I’m not down for that.” 

you weren’t sure if he was joking or not

“Kidding, kidding, they’re all ok and currently being dropped off at the police station with a note that says ‘courtesy of your friendly neighborhood mafia’.”

“I still have no idea if you’re joking or not Jihoon.”

“Let’s just pretend I’m serious then.” he said as you both started laughing

“I’m just glad you’re safe.” you said blushing at hearing your own words

“Why wouldn’t I be, you were the one in trouble here y/n”

“I could have taken them.”

“Sure sure.” he smiled

“Listen, I’m not letting you out of my sight again. I genuinely thought that perhaps it’d be safer for you without interacting with me, but this situation only proved that I can’t let you go anywhere by yourself.” he said turning to face you

“So stay here with me will you?” his eyes looked gently into yours

“I-”

“We have high speed internet and netflix.” he laughed “If you’re interested.”

“So I’d have to live with the mafia?” you asked raising an eyebrow

“No you’re just living in our territory and that way I can see you more often.” he shrugged

“Ok but only if the netflix thing is for sure.” you laugh

and you’re surprised as he gently presses his lips against yours

the scent of something floral and citrusy warming you as his gentle lips kissed yours

“As long as you’re here with me.” he said

MASTERLIST

[self-shipping-angel]

I gots a question for everybody! How did the two of you meet? XD

Zen: Ah, my sweet Jagiya. I love her dearly but she can be a bit too trusting. She started talking to a stranger she met through an app on her phone and they convinced her to go to Rika’s apartment. The hacker downloaded our RFA app to her phone and so she ended up joining our group. We didn’t meet in person till about a week later when Mr Trust Fund Kid had his driver bring her to see me.

Roy: Sayeko was assigned to my unit at Eastern Command when she received her state certification. She actually wrote about it here.

Sheena: Hehe well I actually was ordered by the Pope of Tethe’alla to assassinate the Chosen of Sylvarant. Sayeko just happened to be a good friend of Colette and had joined her on her journey of world regeneration. So uhhh not exactly the best way to meet my future girlfriend, but everything worked out.

Naotsugu: Sayeko had joined Crescent Moon Alliance and was helping with the Crescent Burger stand. I ran into her while I was helping too. She was in this adorable waitress costume and.... I barely talked to her. She was just too cute!

[sunjaesol]

Thoughts whilst watching 6x12

- I actually feel sorry for Theo. He has no one. He came back from the dead, was forced to help the pack, bonded with Liam, but then got neglected again. He does have a really fancy Jeep so idk how that worked out but okay.  - It’s the spiders again. Rats, bugs in wolves, spiders. Odd.  - Can someone try out Scott’s number and see what happens?  - Hunters?  - Oh, come on why you gotta shoot him? he just pulled a spider out of his back. - I wonder why Scott hallucinated. It has, as far as I remember, never happened before. Was it the shock that the bullet was Argent’s, thinking he’s killing the supernatural again with stronger, more dangerous weapons? Perhaps. Or it has something to do with the aftermath of the Wild Hunt. Liam can’t control himself sometimes, and Scott wolfed out in front of an entire squad of police officers.  - The Sheriff is just not impressed anymore lol. Like “wop, there I go again, attacked by something I don’t know the name of.”  - Also why is Malia running behind him? For Lydia, it’s logical, but Malia is a were-coyote. Use that super speed girl.  - Ugh, why are they all so pretty?  - Pack feels in the car ayyye.  - Liam and Mason are so cute, it’s all just parallels of Stiles and Scott.  - Those kids are so cute. I remember being hopeful in Freshmen Year that highschool would be awesome and full of dreams. (Spoiler Alert: it is filled with homework and tears) - “Go lacrosse!” “yay sports” I CAN’T XD - Bitch if he doesn’t make an appointment than you can’t force him.  - “Opportunities Multiply as They Are Seized.” True.  - lol and then Mason happily walking in nearly fangirling over his favourite peot or something.  - that knife though. threat from the argent’s?  - aw come on, why do the black people always get hurt here. First the black orderly, now him. He’s just fourteen, leave him alone.  - Thank the Gods that Parrish is finally useful. You were shit in season five and 6A. Thank the Gods for making him go and not Lydia.  - I want Lydia’s top.  - Please, Scott should’ve known from the beginning the passport was Allison. His own passport for everything in sophomore year was Allison.  - Oh and thank you Teen Wolf for not forgetting one of your greatest characters. Allison Argent will be forever missed. I really, fucking miss her.  - Malia’s humour is on point btw.  - So the name of the dead hellhound is Halwyn. Halwyn Hellhound, nice to meet you.  - So the white haired dude is a doctor ohhhhh. - bitch even if you do lock him up Parrish can still burn down the gate he’s literal fire.  - BRETT - Wait since when does Corey play lacrosse? And do girls still play in the team? Because you had Kira and then later on Gwen in 6A. Now it seems like there are none. CONSISTENCY, TEEN WOLF! - Liam hold your wolf in, please.  - Aye it’s that relative of Brett that I always forget the name of. No hard feelings, girlie.  - Keep it in, Liam.  - “That’s the IED I remember.” dude. not cool. wait, doesn’t Brett know that Liam is a werewolf? Isn’t Brett one himself? Or did I just read that in fanfiction? I’m so confused.  - oh yeah he knows nevermind.  - fuck he’s hot - well hello Samarah from The Ring.  - oh wait fuck is everyone dead?  - ah, a doctor is evil. what a surprise.  - Come on, Liam. Don’t lose it. Also, where is the black freshman?  - ayyyye Argent please don’t be the bad guy, thank you.  - he’s so not impressed I love him. Him and Melissa are also, clealry, not together, so why did they kiss in 6A if it had no meaning?  - Oh, Malia.  - “Bitch you think im getting out there? hell no.” MALIA I LOVE HER THIS SEASON SHELLEY IS DOING A WONDERFUL JOB.  - For a man like Argent, it’s odd he even used “Allison”, as hackers often opt first for things that are familiar to the ones they are wanting to hack. Like family names, pets, dates, et cetera.  - Fuck, man, he’s also part human. You’re a murderer. Well, he’s a hunter, actually. Now it’s just not an organised party, everyone is just killing. It’s basically season 4 only without the money.  - wop, guess Jordan will go in hibernation then.  - This woman fucking stayed at school for hours just to give him back that ball and threathen him or something. Jesus get a life.  - oh fuck you. using wolfsbane is a dick move. - Lydia fucking register for MIT odwn throw that away please. You have a little less than two hours so do something.  - I love her ring. Very minimalistic. (gets sudden thoughts of married stydia and starts crying. trash ophelia has arrived) - oh my God, Lydia, how much has Stiles influenced you. Like “Woopsie she caught me just pretend you’re really interested in this pack of post its yep totally not suspicious yep perfect perfect plan amazing awesome.” - Also her banshee powers are on point.  - Bitch he has never even terrified anyone. You have nothing to him personally but you’re acting like he did.  - oh sure just stick a pole in his body.  - “That’s incredible”, oh so now she’s a sadist, great.  - oh cry cry you bitch be fucking afraid. what a dumb bitch.  - no no no don’t go to the counsellor - How did Liam not smell blood? Or just the stench of a body? Anyway, good job Mason.  - Holy fucking shit. I get why the call it the most gory season yet. I’m fascinated though.  - NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO LYDIA STAY AWAY sTILES WOULD MURDER EVERYONE IF HE KNEW lYDIA WENT I ALONE;  - Her booties... I want them.  - nononononono don’t lock Lydia up, please let her go she doesn’t deserve this.  - great she’s probabaly having some sort of PTSD attack. great great great. -_- - LYDIA - Even though I’m still against Lydia being there, her having her warrior “overcoming fears” Mulan-esque moment is so badass and inspiring. I’m here for it.  - But you can’t just kill a hellhound. It should be a special kind of bullet. So, if the doctor puts a bullet against Parrish’ head, it shouldn’t kill him. Something’s off.  - YESSS LYDIA - Even though I don’t ship Parrish and Lydia, it’s like now they’re even. he saved her in Eichen, now she saved him. It’s cool :) - “I’m worried about you”, and in that moment, the whole scolia fandom died.  - Scott’s look though, I’m even shipping it. He’s probably thinking of kissing her and then snaps out of it.  - “cutesy looking down afraid of admitting feelings that have been developing since 3B” trope. - Scott’s smile - Yep. This is exactly how Stydia has been built up and I like it. I like Scolia. I’m here for it. -  awww, bonding over almost being killed many times. cute. -  cockblock!Argent - okay even I fangirled over that “Scott is looking while she isn’t”-look. That’s a parallel to this right here motherfuckers

- oh no they found the boy - wait, what was the flesh thing then?  - Wait but Liam hasn’t done anything to the pupils. Or have I forgotten something?  - oh fucking hell Gerard.  - ah, so Gerard is going to recruit a new batch of hunters, as the Argent’s basically stopped. 

[seven-for-president]

RFA (+V and Saeran) reacting to MC who gets hit by a biker

_Yoosung_

° is in the middle of playing LOLOL when he gets the call from the Hospital

° “Are you Kim Yoosung? Your girlfriend just got hit by a biker and we´d like you to come by and pi- Mr. Kim are you still there?”

° immediatly runs to the hospital you´re at

° nope, doesn´t giva a f*ck about traffic and stuff

° almost gets run over by a car himself （｀〇Д〇）

° Y u not careful??! (╬ Ò ‸ Ó)

° arrives while panting like he´s about to die

° they almost take him to the emergency Department （＊〇□〇）……！

° “MC where are you ??”

°  hyperventilates because you´re nowhere to be found ( ≧Д≦)

° when you finally come out of a room he cries tears of joy

° “Yoosung what´s wrong you look like you´re going to collapse!”

° he then realices you´re totally fine and almost not hurt at all (＾▽＾)

° just a few scraches here and there

° “They, they told me you got hit by a biker. I tought you´ll die!!”

° “Babe chill I´m fine” (￣▽￣)ノ

° when you tell him what happend he gets reaaalyyy pale (like a ghost)

° starts crying again xD

° you two go home together

° CUDDLE-TIME!!!!

° for the next few weeks he accompanies you wherever you go

° so sweeet (♥ω♥*)

° from now on he´ll be your Guardian angel (´∀｀)♡

_Jaeee_

° she´s at work no suprise there

° the hospital calls her 3 times

° but they can´t reach her ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

° so who cares you just go home alone and wait there

° when she checks her mailbox........

° super worried and ditches work to come to you

° now you know you mean very much to her o(≧∇≦o)

° freaks out when she finds out you left the hospital on your own

° calls imediately to confirm if you´re alright

° “Why didn´t you wait for me MC?”

° “Because it would have taken houres for you to pick up your phone.”

° Ouch MC that hurt !

° “...”

° “I´ll be home in 10″

° when she arrives she apologizes like a MILLION  times

° you did too because it wasn´t very nice of you t say that

° after that incident she gets a Special emergency phone for those times you really need her

° now you can reach her 25/8

° Jumin wants her to get a phone just for him to call her

° NO, JUMIN! NO!!

° but seriously she´s glad you´re okay and nothing Major happend ( ﾟ▽ﾟ)/

° she Cooks your favourit meal for you so that you stop beingangry at her

° you weren´t serious with being angry, but whatever

° until you´ve completly recoverd : MOMMY-JAEHEE-MODE ACTIVATED

° let´s just say she´s back into work mode soon enough

_Zen_

° it´s bee a really long time since one of his old biker friends gave him a call

° he wanted to intruduce you to them because you were quite interested in bikes and stuff

° “Hey what´s up? I wanted to call you because my girlfriend said she is-”

° “Zen we´re sorry we hit your gorlfrind with the bikes !”

° “You did what??!”

° the first thing he thinks of is to punh them

° then it hit him like that bike hit you

° (sorry that one was bad XD)

° “How is she? Did you bring her to a Hospital? have you called the ambulance?!”

° “Zen chill I´m alright”

° thanks god his princess was fine !!!1

° “Where are you I´ll come and kill those guys!”

° Zen, pls

° “I´m at the park...But Zen Keep calm i´ll be home in 15 minutes” (・_・ヾ

° but he had no time to Keep calm !!!

° hung up and ran to the park (not that the bus would have bee faster, ..... just saying )

° so you facepalmed and waited there or him

° good thing the company wasn´t that bad though

° when he arrived you just sat there and chatted with his new archenimies

° Zen pls Keep it down  

° “Prepare to die ypu stupid morons!”

° “No, Zen please it was my fault!”

° the Moment you cling onto him, tight, he hugs you and Looks how bad your injurnies are

° not that worse but still a reason for him to punish a certain biker gang

° without another word he carries you princess-style (how else ?) and takes you home

° “bye bye guys !!” “Bye MC!”

° at that night you got a lecture about being careful in the traffic and so on and so on....

° but it Ends by you pushing him down and kiss him so he just stops nagging

° it worked ೕ(･ㅂ･ )

_Jumin_

° Oh, Boy he´s at a very boring important meeting when he gets the call by Driver Kim

° “Sir, your wife got slightly hit by a Biker. I´m taking her to the next hospital.”

° SHE.GOT.WHAT?

° needless to say they adjourned the Meeting

° is very anxious the whole ar ride

° yells at the traffic light to turn green sooner

° it didn´t work

° of course the next Hospital happend to be the best in the whole City -.-

° you just get out of the room they examined you in

° “Jumin, didn´t you have a Meeting?”

° MC, pls

° “of course I got here as soon as I heard what happend!”

° he is at the ege of a breakdown and you´re just.... chill?

°  so you explain everything to him and that you only got a tiny scratch here and there

° he´s still not sure about you being totally fine

° what if you  hurt your head from falling down?

° what if you got an infection because dirt got in your wounds?

° to your luck the doctor was there to tell him that ther´s no need for him to worry

° not like you told him that from the start (￣ω￣)

° so when you´re finally home he´ll do everything to make you forget your horrible accident

° is still worried and now one of the Bodyguards is at your side

° NONSTOP

° it´s annoying but when you two cuddle together with Elisabeth you´re more than happy to bear it for him

_Saeyoung/Seven_

° one of his Hobbys include hacking into the cameras on the street so he can always watch you

° some might call i Stalking but he calls it showing affection

° so he sees it live on Screen how you got hit by that stupid biker

° but you look alright so he spends his time findingthat peron through his license plate

° of course being the hacker god he is it only took him 1.57 minutes

° by the time you arrive home he already got his first aid kid ready as well as a hot cocoa for you (♥ω♥*)

° Is super caring at first but soon he´ll be wearing one of his cosplay

° why, Seven , why ?

° “Seven please stop wearing that it hurts when I laugh!”

° “But aren´t I the cutest Nurse EVAAA?”

° He is

° a few days after that you found a letter in the mail

° it was from the biker, he apologized for hitting you

° “Saeyoung did you threaten People again?”

° “What if?”

° “Then I must admit that you´re the best boyfriend ever”

° who wouldn´t want someone who commits a crime for you?

° the definition of romantic

° you decide to thank him properly and prepare all of his favourite Food (with the help of Saeran)

° then you have the best dinner ever and he even gets to cuddle with you afterwards (｡♥‿♥｡)

° this got you like 100000000000 affection Points and a very fun night ;)

_V_

° one day you came home and he just felt something was off

° womens Intuition? screw that here Comes V!

° “Has anything happen to you, my dear?”

° you sigh

° why does he always knows this stuff

° V´s superpowers confirmed?

° “Nothing I just bumped into someone and fell.”

° well, that was not completly a lie

° “Oh, really? in Who?

° “A biker”

° SHOCK

° “MC why didn´t you tell me??”

° he´s really hurt know... great MC

° “I just didn´t want you to worry “

° you go and hug him so he stops being worried/ mad

° “The next time this happens just call me and I´ll be right there to help you”

° “I´ll always be there to protect ou MC”

° you promise and the next time you go out alone you feel as if there´s a presence around you just to protect you （*´▽｀*）

_Saeran_

° you just went out a Little to get icecream for him and a Crêpe for you

° unfortunately you focused more on your Food than on the traffic

° don´t do that MC, always be careful around cars and bikes!

°  so you cross the street and on your last steps on the road you got slightly hit by this biker

° “No, my Crêpe !” ( ≧Д≦)

° you know if you get hit in the traffic always worry about your Food first XD

° but Saeran is there and picks you up

° “MC how can you worry about Food in a Situation like this?”

° “ But I´m fine and it was so delicious”

° you sprained your ankle so he carried you back with a piggy-back ride

° only after you got something new to eat of course

° when you arrive home he tries to wrap up your foot in a Bandage... and Fails miserably

° nevertheless ist really cute of him to do that

° so you two just call it a day and settle down to watch a film

° turns out you´remore exhausted than you thought you are and poof you fall asleep with your head on his lap

° so Saeran got something out of this after all ( ° ʖ °)

Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it (*^▽^*)

send me your requests, if you have some and if you like you can leave a comment or a like which would make me a very happy person （‐＾▽＾‐）

[stargleeksil-blog]

Criminal Minds s05e21 “Exit Wounds” review - or  more aptly named, my baby girl is the best innocent cupcake with the biggest heart ever and I am so in love with Kirsten Vangsness and they need to make Morgan/Garcia happening

Episode 21 – Exit Wounds

Hey guys! So I’ve got time for one more review before I have to go and do shopping for the weekend and upcoming week. I also have to buy more Tupperware … sigh.

Ew. We’re starting with butchering fish? I love fish, but I’m one of those hypocrites who can’t stand the thought that you actually have to kill living organisms in order to eat them XD

“Is anyone there? ‘Is anyone there,’ Brenda? Right, ‘cause the homicidal maniac hiding in the shadows is really going to answer you.”

By far the smartest victim we’ve seen so far.

Oh boy, so she actually knows her killer? Oh honey.

“JJ, that’s not the point.”

Ooh, girl talk! I’m gonna love this episode.

“Well, are you gonna call him?”

Call who? Mick?

“Maybe.”

“Emily.”

I love playfully-frustrated JJ.

“Mick Rawson is an arrogant, oversexed, egotistical …”

“Hot British dude with a sexy accent, badge and a gun.”

I’m wet just thinking about it.

“Just your type.”

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

“You know what? I don’t even get you sometimes.”

Lol.

“It wouldn’t go anywhere.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I know our work schedules.”

Now you’re just making up excuses, Emily.

“Okay, you know what? Will and I make it work.”

True enough.

“Oh, no.”

Oh my goodness gracious, I’m dying!

“I know. Don’t say it.”

“But when you see what’s in here … it’s not my fault.”

“They were calling to me, I swear. And they were all on sale. And when you think about it, that means that I am helping the economy.”

“Which is more than I can say for you guys, ‘cause no one else has bags.”

I love her reasoning.

“Please tell me all of those aren’t for my son.”

XDDDDDDDD “They’re not. This one is for Kevin.”

I love you, Penelope.

“What? It is my duty as a fairy godmother to spoil the child.”

True.

“And Henry is finally old enough to be fun when opening presents. I’m not taking them back.”

“Give me my coffee and no one’s gonna get hurt.”

Oh I love this woman.

“Half-calf, extra shot venti, 2-pump nonfat, hold the whip caramel macchiato.”

WHOA. That’s quite the coffee order.

“Next stop, Xanadu.”

Aw, so cute!

“Oh, wait … Xana-don’t. “Time to go to the BAU, ladies.”

Oh dear.

“Maybe I should get a cat.”

Oh Emily.

“Whoa!”

‘Whoa’ is definitely the appropriate sentiment.

“Sorry to ruin your night.”

“What, are you working on wife number four?”

“I see you people way too much.”

I love this show.

So they’re headed to Alaska?

My poodle rattling off fun facts about the town.

“It could be a sign of remorse. Cover their bodies so he doesn’t have to face the reality of what he’s done.”

“Or he thinks the women are trash and he’s just placed them where he thinks they belong.”

Oh dear.

“Garcia, I need you with us.”

Wait what?

“Sir?”

“I’ve tasked a satellite uplink and it’s your job to keep us connected.”

“Yes, sir.”

So she’s flying to Alaska with them? Oh boy.

John Morley: “Nature in her most dazzling aspects or stupendous parts, is but the background and theater of the tragedy of man.”

WHOA.

“Wearing gloves and making sure there aren’t any witnesses – that’s a no-brainer.”

“But what concerns me is the evolution of the kills.”

“Evolution?”

“Well, he started with easy prey.”

Oh boy.

“But he didn’t have to overpower either one of them. Both victims were shot.”

“Which is my point exactly. He killed them both from a safe distance.”

“But Brenda Bright was younger, more athletic. She would have been able to put up much more of a fight, so why not shoot her, too?”

My smart puppy.

“He used an arrow, but he didn’t shoot her with it. He stabbed her.”

Oh god.

“I should let everybody know that reception in the area is unreliable at best.”

“I’m giving everybody satellite phones for communication, and I’ve already preprogrammed all your digits into speed dial.”

“Guess who’s lucky number seven.”

I love you.

So cute how they’re trying to get a good look at the town.

Can we just talk about the fact that Garcia literally has a wheelie bag while the rest of them have a carry-on? I love you, lady!

“It’s pretty isolated out here. How do you get basic supplies?”

My smart puppy.

“You’re sure packing an awful lot of stuff for a fishing trip.”

Oh wow, so he’s actually leaving the place? Where the frack is he going? He’s in the middle of literally nowhere.

“What convinced you she was stabbed with the arrow instead of shot?”

Ew.

“I found urine on the remains.”

Fuck, he actually peed on them? FUCK. Oh, so he only peed on the male? Ew.

“He’s playing with the bodies, experimenting with this methodologies.”

Oh that is gross.

“We’re dealing with a psychopath.”

No shit.

Wait. They covered up the blood that was left at the crime scene?

“You contaminated the scene?”

So they had to do it so the rabid bear in the woods won’t come and kill them. Fuck.

My cutie setting up.

“What are you doing?”

“Trying to make this place a little less analog.”

Oh, tech burn.

“Sorry. I forget my hacker jokes aren’t funny.”

They are to me.

“My name is Penelope. I’m the one who doesn’t carry a weapon, aside from my biting wit.”

Which is as good a weapon as a gun, honey.

“And my job includes combining my kick-ass systems with your sheriff’s department database to get the skinny on your neighbors and you.”

“Or you could just ask us what you want to know …”

“No. Because in my experience, the information superhighway never lies and people do.”

Oh my lovely genius.

“That’s when I check your criminal record. And you, my friend, are clean as a whistle.”

“What does that even mean.”

“No idea.”

Ha.

“He’s already experimenting with his victims.”

Ew.

And apparently most of them are bailing.

“Can you blame them?”

Nope.

“It sounds like your basic survival skills.”

“No, they’re hunting skills.”

Exactly.

“Think about it. The marksmanship, the urine – it makes sense.”

“The urine makes sense?”

I’m with Derek here. Uber ew.

“All right, so we’ve got a psychopath with hunting skills who knows the routines of everyone in town. How are we supposed to keep everyone safe?”

Mission impossible.

“I’m gonna pull an all-nighter, finish going through the town records. Should have background checks by sunrise.”

I love her dedication.

“I’ve got four rooms available.” “Uh, four?”

Oh my honeys, you’re so used to the good life. Get ready to double up.

“I’m not sleeping with Reid.”

HEY! That’s not nice!

“Dibs.”

Oh my freaking goodness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“What do you mean, you’re sharing a room with Morgan?”

Oh god, Lynch the Bitch is back. For like those few moments of jealousy. I don’t like you.

I mean, I love Nicholas Brendon beyond belief, but I hate Kevin Lynch.

“Oh, you’re jealous.”

“Jealous? Why? Because you’re bedding down with a …muscle-bound, modern-day 007?”

“He’s more like Jason Bourne.”

Exactly.

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

“He took the floor.”

Exactly. Because my puppy is a gentlemen.

“Just make sure he keeps his weapon holstered.”

Oh my freaking god. That is genius writing.

And I can totally see Xander coming out right now XD

“Why are you up right now, anyway? It’s so late.”

“Actually, it’s early. I just got to Quantico.”

“Damn time zones.”

Cuties.

“Hello?”

“Frack.”

XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Are they allowed to say that on national TV?

“Oh, come on, baby.”

“Nice one, Garcie.”

I love it when she talks to herself.

Oh my god.

No.

My baby girl, why are you going after something strange in the dark? Why?

“You’re gonna be okay.”

Oh, I am so in love right now.

“Just keep looking at me.”

“Help!”

Someone help my new girlfriend! “He’s accelerating his schedule.”

Fuck.

“There has to be more to it than that.”

“He brought the body to the tavern we’re staying at. He’s telling us he’s not afraid of us.”

Oh god.

“He switched to a hunting knife. Looks like a jagged edge.”

“It’s hard to say, but judging from the location, I would guess liver or spleen.”

Oh god, he took a part of the victim? Ew.

“He was alive.”

“What?”

“He was still alive.”

“Baby, there’s nothing else you could have done.”

“I felt him leave.”

Oh my god.

“He was there one second, and then – just a body.”

“I’m really sorry that you had to see all of that.”

“Derek, I didn’t see it, I was in it.”

Oh my goodness. I know this is super sad and really traumatic for Penelope, but I can’t get over how tender Derek is, and I’m so in love with the both of them right now.

“I was sort of used to seeing horrible things from the safety of my screens every day, but this was … right there.”

“Why didn’t you go and find someone before you ran out there?”

“Because when I got shot, I remember thinking the last thing I’m ever gonna see in this life is the man who killed me, and I couldn’t let that happen to him.”

Oh god, I’m so in love.

“He had to see something good before he died.”

“You ran right towards the unsub. You could have been killed.”

“I know that. Don’t treat me like I’m the victim.”

“All right. I’m sorry.”

Oh god.

“I want to ask you a couple of questions, all right?”

“No. cognitive interviews, breaking someone’s death down to a science and statistic – that’s your world, Derek, not mine!”

“I will help from mine.”

“Penelope!”

“Derek, let her go.”

“Will you look after her, please?”

Oh my goodness, she is so shook up she can’t even give a cognitive interview, and it’s so cute and sad at the same time that my heart is ripping.

“Was Garcia able to give you any new information?”

“She’s given all she can.”

So leave her alone.

“He’ll have extensive hunting experience.”

Oh god. I really hope they catch this fucker soon.

So they now think it’s Joshua Bradley? I think so, too.

“So you enjoy hunting?”

“Then would you say you take pleasure in the kill?”

“Doesn’t everyone?”

“Actually, no … they don’t.”

Ha.

“Needle, meet haystack.”

I love this writing team.

“Yeah, we need the big guns.”

“Ripped and ready to rumble.”

“Uh, maybe you should sit this one out.”

I love how they try to help her. I love you so much, my beautiful cupcakes.

“Put this bastard where he belongs.”

XD

“No, he’s not.”

Why is she thinking that Joshua isn’t the unsub?

“Reid.”

Oh my clueless poodle.

“Well, welcome back, red delicious.”

“Take a bite out of this.”

Oh my god, I love those two so much!

“Anyone else look like they might be leaving town?”

Of course she can give them the answers.

“Penelope, you are …”

“So ready to go home.”

Oh my darling.

“Do you mind my asking who the father is?”

She doesn’t even know. Oh dear.

I really hope she will be saved.

“It’s for your own protection.”

Crap. They killed Josh’s mom? Oh boy.

“This one’s personal.”

“He played with her body.”

Oh god, I want to throw up.

Oh god, they have to tell him that his mother was killed fuck.

Oh my poor nutcase.

“Please, sit down.”

“I’m sorry. She’s gone.”

Oh my sympathetic poodle, I love you so much.

“You don’t want to think of her that way.”

“If you had gone to her, there’s a good chance you’d both be dead.”

“I need to see my mom.”

“Well, let’s have someone take you.”

“It’s okay, I know the way.”

Why you being rude to my poodle?

“Did you see his behavior shift from wanting to help us to wanting to leave?”

“He’s lying.”

“Because he knows who the unsub is.”

Oh dear.

“Garcia, got anything?”

“Their lives has been torn apart, figuratively and literally, and I can’t find anything.”

“I’m hacking into his college database as we speak. Maybe there’s something about his life in Seattle I may have missed.”

Oh god, please find this fucker.

“Why the mutilation? Why the overkill?”

“Mutilation?”

What is Rossi onto here?

“We need to adjust the profile.”

Huh?

“These animals weren’t mutilated by a rabid bear. Someone did this.”

Oh god.

“An animal wouldn’t have left so much.”

“We should have seen it before. It’s homicidal triad 101.”

Fuck. Oh god.

“I found something uber weird.”

Oh god, I’m seriously nervous about this one.

“Talk about abandonment issues.”

Oh god, someone find this fucking Owen bastard. I want him dead for freaking out my baby girl like that.

“We’re surrounded by waterways and mountains. He could be anywhere.”

Oh that dad is an asshole! “Did you know?”

Don’t be disrespecting my honeys!

“He’s not here. But the window’s open.”

Fuck.

“Sit down and shut up.”

Oh snap!

“I promise he will not lay a hand on you again.”

I LOVE YOU AARON HOTCHNER!

Hey, sheriff, let go!

“We’ve got a problem.”

“They’re hunting Owen.”

Shit.

Fuck.

“Did they just shoot him?”

“They wouldn’t be shooting if they weren’t close.”

“Let’s go.”

Find them, please.

“Hold on, guys.”

“Yeah, Hotch, what’s up?”

“Ok. Got it.”

“There’s a new plan. He’s heading for the harbor.”

Oh boy.

“Drop the weapons and back away!”

Please, just stop it.

“He needs help and he will be held accountable for his crimes.”

God, I hate it when they think they know the system and think it’s against him.

’m terribly sorry for your loss, but please just put your guns down so no one else gets hurt.”

“Who do you think has the higher ground here?” “I’m pretty sure we do!”

Ha.

Now they’re backing down.

“You shot him?”

“He’ll live.”

Yup.

“It sucks, doesn’t it?”

“What?”

“Just knowing that we couldn’t have done any of this without you.” XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

I love how he appreciates her so much.

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“I’m proud of you, Penelope. Despite everything that happened, you came back …and you go the job done.”

“The sight of blood used to make me run away. And two nights ago I ran towards.”

“It means you’re changing into someone stronger than you realize. You cared enough to risk your own life to try and save someone else.”

“Yeah, but … what’s the difference being strong and being jaded?”

“I’m scared, Derek. I don’t want to lose who I am just so I can do this job.”

“We are in one of the most beautiful places on earth. I know you see that, don’t you?” Yup.

“Then we have nothing to worry about.”

“It’s who you are, baby girl. You see the beauty in everything and everyone no matter where you go.”

“That part of you is never gonna change, and I won’t let it.”

“I don’t need you to protect me.”

“Tough. I think I’m gonna stay on the job a little while longer.”

“Yeah? How much longer?”

“Every day of my life.”

“I kinda love you, Derek Morgan.”

“I kinda love you, Penelope Morgan.”

Oh god, my heart is bursting with love right now.

Ralph W. Sockman: “Nothing is so strong as gentleness, and nothing is so gentle as real strength.”

Okay, so aside from the awful murder aspect of the episode, I just fell in love with this one. It’s one of my favorites, because we see Penelope actually helping someone in the real field, not from behind a computer, even though it’s amazing what she does on a regular basis, and we got to see more Morgan/Garcia goodness, and even though Lynch the Bitch cropped up, it reminded me more of Xander than Kevin Lynch so I’m okay with that.

Perfect episode aside from the murder.

I’ll see you guys later, honeys! Thank you so much for the support <3