#meanwhile here I am on round 2

[jbluphin]

Skyping with my bf between rooms of the apartment so I don't give him covid.

Thought I was done with this shit when he moved in with me. Long-distance relationship flashbacks...

[totaly-obsessed]

The Weight of Expectations

Alexia Putellas x reader

-> Happy Birthday to my darling @greynatomy, love ya!

-> Alexia struggles through the IVF journey and turns mean

-> Talk of pregnancy, alcohol and abuse

➳ Masterlist

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

“¡No puedes hablar en serio!”

Oh. Alexia was home, something new. You were currently in the bathroom closest to the bedroom, heaving up anything that you had eaten, even the light soup. 

For a couple of days, you had been like this, and two days ago you had finally done a test. A pregnancy test. This was the last IVF round before Ale and you had to start considering other options like adoption. The first 2 rounds had failed.

Positive. The goddamn test was finally positive.

Immediately you had made an appointment for a blood test to get done. You just had to be sure before telling Alexia. The blonde already blamed herself, thinking she had waited for too long, hesitant to have a child while in the midst of her career before she finally committed to it.

You had been so incredibly happy when she came to you after a game. Tears streamed down your face when she told you that she was ready to have a child. With you.

The disappointment of two failed attempts weighed heavily on Alexia. She desperately tried to console you as you cried, hiding her own tears in her pillow when you finally passed out. How could she be sad when you had to go through the physical aspect as well?

She shouldn't have waited that long, maybe 29 was too old.

After that things changed. She had left for Spain camp, and after that, she threw herself back into work in Barcelona. Her surgery was healing well and she was getting better and better by the day.

Meanwhile, you were sat at home, trying to understand the change in your wife. Did you do something wrong? With the previous tries the footballer had been so involved, checking in on you multiple times a day when she was at training. 

And now? Nothing.

Alone you had gone to the blood test yesterday, not even needing an explanation for your wife, who came home after you had gone to bed and left before you woke up.

Eight Weeks. You were already two months along. In Alexia's absence, you had completely forgotten to test, wanting to do it with her.

As soon as you had gotten the confirmation, the morning sickness hit ten times harder. Who even decided to call it that? Morning sickness… What a stupid fucking name. The whole day was filled with sudden cramps and vomiting.

And you had done it all alone until now. 

But Alexia was here now, yelling in the kitchen, before she stomped up the stairs to the bathroom, looking into every door available on her way. She was looking for you.

She hesitated for a second, seeing you crouched on the floor, head over the toilet, and pale as the white wall behind you.

“¡No puedes hablar en serio!”, she yelled again, now in your face.

“I am serious Ale, what's up?”

This was the first time you had seen her in a couple of days, her roots were starting to show, as did the bags under her eyes. But the rest of her body looked stronger than ever, the countless hours in the gym paying off.

“The kitchen is a mess, you didn’t do the laundry and you didn't mop the floors either. Look how filthy it is in this house!”

Wow.

You didn't know what you had been expecting. But definitely not this.

With slow movements you pushed yourself up, using the sink to help balance yourself. Fuck were you dizzy.

“W- What did you mean?” You hated how meek your voice sounded after your wife practically yelled at you.

Her face was red, and her eyes looked like she had been bitten by the devil, spit gathering at the corners of her mouth.

Crazy. She looked really fucking crazy, and it was terrifying.

“¿En serio?”

“Let’s just go downstairs, I made dinner and we can talk about it.” 

With a scoff the blonde turned on the spot, stomping down the stairs, leaving you in the bathroom. Tears threatened to fall. What has happened?

With your nausea, it took you a bit longer to navigate the stairs. Every step hurt, but Alexia couldn’t care less about your pain-filled noises. She was busy stabbing a fork into her dinner, already scarfing a plate of your favorite pasta dish down.

“Finally. God, you always take so long.”

The words were filled with hate as she spat them at you, not even noticing that a bit of the sauce was flung onto her cheeks. 

You couldn’t help but smile a bit, she had never managed to eat without making a mess of herself and the table. With a damp cloth, you tried to wipe the spot away, but when she hit your hand away from her, the cloth sailed to the floor as you looked at her. Eyes wide in panic.

“I am not your goddamn child. I can take care of myself.”

Your wives' usually warm eyes pierced your heart even more. Was this really the same woman who would carry you to bed every night, even after grueling training and rehab sessions?

The tears you had breathed away were back, a painful sensation in your eyes as Alexia continued to devour the meal you had prepared with so much excitement to tell her as if it didn't mean anything.

“This tastes like shit. Not even good for cooking.” She threw the fork on the plate, the clattering sound ripping you out of your shock-induced trance. “Do you want me to make you something different?

Your wife looked terrifying. Her eyes were wide open with small pupils that moved around quickly, looking you up and down before making their way through the house. The rest of her face was stoic, a facade she had perfected over the years. One that she didn’t usually use with you.

“No. I don’t want new food. I want you to get yourself together.”

The room filled with a heavy silence that nearly made you gasp for air. What did she mean?

“Amore I don’t know what has gotten into you, but maybe we should just go for a quick walk? Get some fresh air?”

That was the final nail in the coffin for the footballer, who stood up with such force, that the chair slid back and toppled over with a startling noise.

“Fresh air? You want fresh air?” She was getting in your face now, hunching a little to really get close. “Do you know what I want?”

Her breath was warm as it hit your nose.

Alcohol. You could smell alcohol.

She was a mean drunk, snapping at anyone who dared to get too close to her, her dog, or you. But just like her stern face, you were usually safe from her drunken attitude. Your wife always pushed you behind her as soon as anything looked like trouble.

This was new and you hated it.

“What do you want Ale?”

the defender had emptied your cup of coffee in one go, slamming the mug down on the counter.

“What do I want? I a housewife that can actually do her fucking job!” She was yelling now, some of the words accentuated with harsh hand movements and slight pushes to your shoulders.

“And look at how you let yourself go. Fucking pathetic! How can I even show myself in public with you?”

Shit that hurt.

You were finally pregnant with a very much wanted child, and she acted like this after leaving you alone for such a long time.

“Gained so much weight it’s-”

“I’m pregnant.”

You didn't yell. You didn’t shout. You said it with a normal voice. Well as normal as you could with tears threatening to spill.

But it was enough to quiet the drunk blonde. 

“Pregnant? You’re pregnant?”

It felt as if she was looking at you for the first time when her eyes softened and her whole body slumped. She fucked up. And she knew it.

In a frenzy you started packing things, throwing stuff into a suitcase while your wife tried to stop you. “Where are you going? Amore, please! I am so sorry!”

But it was too late.

With a suitcase and Alexia’s car, you made your way to Eli’s house, you had no one in Spain, all your family back home, so you decided to turn to your wife's mother who loved you to no end and had spent a lot of time at your house while Alexias had been ‘busy’ the last few weeks.

Alexia watched as you left. You were pregnant with a child that she wanted so badly, and she fucked it up.

Tomorrow she will make up for it. She really will.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - I Still On1y Care About...

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Sept 2024 Week 1

Ongoing Series - Thai

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) eps 7 of 12 - Deeeelightful. They are so damn cute + a nice kiss! The rise of the green flag semes continues. I like it when Diew flirts and shows that he does have some experience in a relationship, and he can/will flex his power. Props to God for being a man who remembers to TAKE HIS DRINK with him. 

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 4 of 10 - Yep I still like it and all its toxicity. It’s fun to see how closely it follows the original. Now I really can’t wait to see how this one ends. Since this time around we get an actual ending.

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 6 of 12 - How did they know that what I wanted more than anything was a side couple = spoiled prince + demon lord? How clever they are to give them to me. Meanwhile, in a shocking twist, the leads have known each other since childhood. Because why be original? 

I Saw You in My Dream (Weds Gaga) ep 8 of 12 - Oh it’s very cute. I love Ing. I love that Ai was honest with his bestie. Best friend's older brother trope is a go! Also good kisses all round. 

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 1 of 12 - Ohm has his shirt off less than 5 min in. I guess GMMTV is learning what we want. My boy Title is the creep character again. I’m assuming that’s why GMMTV brought him on board at this juncture. Sigh. New boy, Q, looks like Mek’s younger brother. Ultimately? I'm not convinced on this one. It is doing what it says on the tin, but nothing more than that. I’m not wild about it, but I will keep watching.

The Trainee (Sun YT) ep 10 of 12 - The more OffGun BLs, the more time they spend communicating as characters in those BLs. It’s kind of charming. They've become the pair that advocates for communication in relationships. I like it as evolution for their brand. Flirting via the printer was very fun. Especially as the Thai script is so beautiful.

Live in Love (Sun Gaga) ep 1 of 5 - I guess this is a lockdown narrative? Odd choice. A lot of familiar faces but from more minor rolls. Is this from the Destiny Seeker people? It feels like that. It’s a bigger cast than I was expecting, and a sort of classic university BL of the kind star Hunter produces. Or the end of love people. Pretty classic Thai pulp stuff. I’m mildly enjoying it. Hali is too hot to be the dorky second lead. Nice to see Boat back on my screen. However, it is… what’s the word I am looking for? Oh yes. Boring. Plus singing. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

The On1y One (Taiwan Thurs Gaga) eps 5-6 of 12 - I entirely lost my mind over this show this week. Fuck me it's so good. The delicacy sends me. I keep expecting it to be clumsy and then is just isn't - it's so subtle and it demands we pay such close attention. I feel like I'm holding my breath the whole time I'm watching.

Cliff's notes on these 2 eps as follows:

The pure unadulterated tsundere of it all.

The awesome angst, it aches.

The series of repercussions after the fight was pacing genius.

The brilliant juxtaposition of "the kid who self isolates too easily" versus "the one who has been forced into isolation" meets both of them being smart enough to know why they react out of hurt, but neither can stop doing it.

Baby’s reaction to learning he’s going to be left behind = to instantly make plans to do the leaving in the future hurts my heart in the best possible way.

"Maybe what we call eternity is just persistence."

Maybe one boy simply deciding to be another boy's rock is romance. 

Production better nail the second half of this show! It better be the world against them from here on out or the audience is gonna riot.

And by "audience" I mean me.

Sugar Dog Life (Japan Sun grey) ep 5 of 10 - Oh noes! Poor baby boy!!! My heart hurts. But also gah so cute and next week they shack up together! Hooray! 

I Hear the Sunspot AKA Hidamari ga Kikoeru (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 11 - too much time spent on the girl again. I don’t need excuses for why she’s a bitch. So can we talk about Taichi instead? It’s such a good characterization, this boy who understands everything about other people but doesn’t notice anything about himself, including his own abilities of observation. The person who is special never realizes how special they are, I guess. The soundscapes are so good with this show. The moments where prod decided to be silent are so vital and so pivotal and used with such delicacy and strategy, it’s truly audio magic manipulation.  

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) eps 7-8 of 12 - I loved how Orca just jumped on the stage. What a great side couple. CHARMED I TELL YOU. Orca was all… singing? Naw. I came back to fuck the manager's brains out. Anything less than that is unacceptable. 

Takara's Treasure AKA Takara No Vidro (Japan Mon Gaga) ep 10 fin - Essentially this was a growth story for Takara and an exercise in patience while the two of them learned each other’s quirks and languages. It was also an exercise in patience for me... who doesn’t like the power differential of a weaker younger character having to do all the pursuing while constantly feeling like he is inferior to the older popular hot character. I know this was a BL that was definitely for some people, since plenty liked it way more than I did, but I didn’t like it very much even though there’s nothing objectively wrong with it. It simply wasn’t to my personal taste. 7/10 

Seoul Blues (Korea Fri? YouTube) ep 5-6 of 8 - Enter an ex or something? Well he certainly has a type. Bah. This whole series seems to be mainly about cheating. It’s very annoying because they are all so pretty. 

Happy of the End (Japan Tues Gaga) - Based on a manga, longer than usual run time. A boy is disowned for being gay, dumped by his boyfriend, and ends up in a dysfunctional co-dependant relationship with his would-be kidnapper. We were due for another messy JBL. Messy gay pain here we go.

Oh it’s exactly what I expected. Do I like it? No I do not. And ya know what? There is plenty airing. I have a bad feeling about this one. DNF 

It's airing but...

4 Minutes (Sat Gaga) eps 1-6 of 8 - Gaga picked this one up so we can watch it there. I'm waiting until the end, it seems angsty and confusing and full of awful people being awful. But also... high heat and I'm shallow. So we shall see which devil wins (and how it ends).

The Hidden Moon (Sat ????) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) ‘เดือนพราง’ by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger)... A Bangkok writer is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai which is being converted into a café. He gets into an accident and nearly dies on his way there. After that, he sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, one boy catches his attention. Was substantially recast. Couldn't find it. Didn't really look.

In case you missed it

Meet You at the Blossom (China) - I'm eating crow, binging the fucker, and live blogging. It's just taking me some time. This isn't really a bingable show, not for me anyway. It's A LOT to take all at once. No new one this week.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Plus:

9/9 Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) 12 eps? - Be gay YinWar, do crimes. Dehup gives us Yin, War, Mark and a few other familiar faces in a Leverage sitch, only queerer.

9/14 Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sat ????) ?? eps - Remake of the original. I'm scared too.

9/15 Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) 10 eps - Assistant to a player boss who is in love with that boss decides to quit to save himself. The boss then makes a move. (A gay What's up with Secretary Kim?)

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Coming SEPTEMBER 2024:

9/17 Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 10 eps - Lawyer and a con artist meet at a bar, pair up, fall in love.

9/28 Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YouTube) ?? eps - oh I don't know just Ba Vinh doing his thing with pretty boys again.

9/? The Time of Fever (Korea iQIYI) 6 eps - HoTae & DongHee are back! Side couple from Unintentional Love Story, same actors, same character names I an WILD for this.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Not sure what this is from but I capped it for a reason so, shrug.

The scent trope AND the childhood crush trope? I see you suckering me into one trope because I like the other. Clever, Battle. Very clever.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

[fanfictionismyaddiction]

Whispers of Rome

Word count: 2.3k

Pairing: Toto Wolff x reader

Summary: On a summer night in Rome, Y/n and her friends meet Toto Wolff and his friend at their favorite bar. Despite exchanging glances, neither Y/n nor Toto can initially find the courage to speak. When their friends' coincidental bathroom trips lead to introductions, the two groups mingle, sparking deeper conversations.

Warnings: Older male younger female, age gap, size difference, soft smut

One Shot Masterlist

______________________________________________________________

It was a warm summer night in Rome, the kind that wrapped the city in a golden glow and made every moment feel like a scene from a movie. Y/n, 24, was out with her two best friends, Sarah, 30, and James, 26. They had just finished a delightful dinner at a quaint trattoria and were now headed to Y/n’s favorite bar, a cozy little spot known for its charming ambiance and exquisite cocktails.

Unbeknownst to Y/n, Toto Wolff, the legendary Formula 1 team principal, was also in Rome. He had come to the city for a brief respite, accompanied by his friend, Mark. After a day of sightseeing, they decided to unwind at a bar that had caught Toto’s eye earlier in the day—the same bar Y/n and her friends were headed to.

As Y/n and her friends settled into their seats, Toto and Mark took a table opposite them. The instant Y/n spotted Toto, she recognized him from the numerous races she had followed, but she never imagined she’d see him here. Throughout the evening, Y/n and Toto exchanged glances, each too shy to approach the other. The air between them crackled with an unspoken connection, a palpable tension that neither could ignore.

"Did you see that guy?" Y/n whispered to Sarah, nodding subtly in Toto's direction.

Sarah turned slightly and then back to Y/n, her eyes widening. "He looks familiar, but I can't place him. Who is he?"

Y/n leaned in closer, her excitement barely contained. "That's Toto Wolff, the handsome guy from Formula 1 I've been telling you about!"

Sarah's eyes lit up in recognition. "Oh really? Now I see what you mean. He does look good!"

Meanwhile, James, oblivious to Y/n’s secret glances, eventually excused himself to the restroom. Coincidentally, Mark did the same. In the restroom, the two men struck up a conversation. James, always the sociable one, mentioned their table and invited Mark and his friend to join them. Mark, sensing an opportunity, agreed.

When they returned, James announced, "Guys, I’ve invited these two gentlemen to join us. Hope you don’t mind."

Y/n’s heart skipped a beat as Toto and Mark took the seats next to them. Despite the shyness that lingered between Y/n and Toto, the group quickly fell into an animated exchange of stories and laughter. Toto introduced himself and Mark, and soon they were all sharing travel stories and favorite places in Rome.

As the conversation flowed, Y/n found herself stealing glances at Toto, admiring his easy smile and the way he listened intently to everyone. She gathered her courage and turned to him. "I have to confess, I know who you are," she said, her cheeks flushing slightly. "I've followed Formula 1 for years."

Toto smiled warmly. "And I have to confess, I noticed you the moment I walked in. There's something about you, Y/n. I just like you."

Y/n's heart fluttered at his words. "Well, that makes two of us then," she replied, feeling a bit braver.

As the night went on, they continued to talk, their conversations becoming more personal. They discussed their passions, their dreams, and the serendipity of their meeting. Despite the shyness, a genuine connection was forming between them.

After a few rounds of drinks, Sarah suggested, “Hey, how about we go to the beach? It’s a beautiful night and the bar’s about to close.”

It was already 2 AM, but the idea of parting ways was the last thing on Y/n and Toto’s minds. Fueled by the courage from the evening’s libations, they all agreed and ordered an Uber.

At the beach, they laid out their jackets on the cool sand. The moon hung low, casting a silver path on the waves. Y/n and Toto found themselves sitting next to each other, the silence between them filled with unspoken words. Y/n broke the silence, turning to Toto with a mischievous grin.

"You know, we should go for a swim when the sun comes up," she said, her eyes sparkling.

Sarah and James eagerly agreed, but Toto hesitated. "I don't know, it's pretty cold," he said with a reluctant smile.

"Come on, it'll be fun," Y/n encouraged. Seeing his hesitation, she stood up and began to strip down to her underwear. "I’m going in!"

Toto watched her, captivated, as she confidently headed towards the water. Her boldness was infectious, and after a moment, he stood up as well, laughing. "Alright, you win," he said, quickly stripping down and following her.

As they waded into the water, the cool waves lapping at their legs, they continued their conversation. "So, what do you love most about Rome?" Toto asked.

"I think it's the history," Y/n replied. "Every corner of the city tells a story. What about you?"

"For me, it's the atmosphere," Toto said. "It's different from anywhere else. The people, the food, the energy—it's all so vibrant."

Y/n nodded. "And tonight has been...unexpectedly wonderful."

Toto smiled, moving closer to her. "It has been. I'm glad we decided to come here."

As they ventured deeper into the water, the coldness of the sea contrasted sharply with the warmth between them. The conversation flowed effortlessly, and as the first light of dawn began to creep over the horizon, the tension that had been building all night finally broke.

Y/n turned to Toto, her eyes reflecting the dawn light. "I've never met anyone quite like you," she said softly.

"And I've never met anyone like you," Toto replied, his voice husky.

The world around them faded as they leaned in, their lips meeting in a tender but electrifying kiss. The kiss deepened, becoming more passionate as the waves gently lapped around them. Their hands explored each other’s bodies, the water making their skin slick and the sensations more intense.

They finally pulled back, breathless. "This is crazy," Y/n whispered, a mix of excitement and disbelief in her voice.

"But it feels right," Toto replied, his eyes locked onto hers.

Y/n nodded, agreeing. "What happens now?"

Toto hesitated for a moment before speaking. "I don't want this night to end. Would you like to come back to my hotel? We can watch the sunrise from there."

Y/n smiled, feeling a thrill of anticipation. "I'd love that."

As the sun rose, casting a warm glow over the beach, they emerged from the water and rejoined their friends. Sarah and James smiled knowingly, glad to see Y/n so happy. The group sat together, drying off in the morning sun, exchanging phone numbers 

______________________________________________________________

The early morning air filled with the sounds of their laughter and chatter. Y/n found herself standing a little apart from the others, lost in her thoughts.

Sarah noticed Y/n's distracted demeanor and walked over to her. "Hey, you okay?" she asked, a knowing smile on her face.

Y/n looked at her friend, a blush creeping up her cheeks. "Yeah, I’m just thinking about everything. It’s been... a lot."

Sarah chuckled. "I can imagine. You two were pretty cozy in the water. So, what’s the plan now?"

Y/n sighed, glancing over at Toto, who was talking to Mark and James a little further down the beach. "He invited me to his hotel. I want to go, but... I don’t know. What if this is just a one-time thing?"

Sarah placed a reassuring hand on Y/n’s shoulder. "Listen, Y/n. You’re one of the most confident and sexy women I know. You went after what you wanted tonight, and it paid off. Don't second-guess yourself now. If you want to spend more time with him, go for it. You deserve to enjoy this."

Y/n smiled, feeling a surge of confidence from Sarah’s words. "You really think so?"

"I know so," Sarah replied firmly. "And honestly, from what I saw, he seems really into you. Just go with the flow and see where it leads."

Encouraged by her friend's words, Y/n nodded. "Thanks, Sarah. You always know what to say."

"That’s what best friends are for," Sarah said with a wink.

Feeling more assured, Y/n walked back over to Toto, who smiled as she approached. "Ready to head out?" he asked, his eyes hopeful.

Y/n glanced back at Sarah, who gave her a supportive nod. "Yeah, I’m ready," she replied, her heart racing with excitement.

______________________________________________________________

The ride to Toto's hotel was filled with a charged silence, both of them acutely aware of the night's possibilities. The early morning light cast long shadows across Rome's ancient streets as their Uber navigated the winding roads. Y/n's heart raced with excitement and anticipation, her hand still entwined with Toto's, feeling the warmth and strength of his grip.

When they arrived, Toto led Y/n through the opulent lobby of the hotel, the grandeur of the place reflecting his stature. The staff greeted him with respectful nods, and Y/n couldn’t help but feel a bit awed by the whole experience. They took the elevator to the top floor, where Toto’s suite offered a breathtaking view of the city waking up under the rising sun.

Once inside the suite, Toto closed the door behind them and turned to Y/n. “Can I get you anything? A drink, perhaps?”

Y/n shook her head, stepping closer to him. “No, I’m good. I just want to...” She trailed off, glancing up at him. The height difference between them was more pronounced now, Toto towering over her with his 6'5" frame. Y/n, at 5'4", had to tilt her head back to look into his eyes, the difference making her feel both small and protected.

Toto smiled down at her, his eyes softening. “I’ve got you,” he murmured, closing the distance between them. He cupped her face in his large hands and leaned down to kiss her, his lips meeting hers with a mix of tenderness and hunger. Y/n responded eagerly, her arms wrapping around his neck, pulling him closer.

They slowly made their way to the large, plush bed, shedding the remnants of their damp clothing along the way. When they finally fell onto the bed, the feel of the soft sheets against their skin was a delicious contrast to the firm touch of their bodies.

Toto paused for a moment, looking down at Y/n with a mixture of desire and tenderness. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, his voice a low whisper.

Y/n nodded, her eyes locked onto his. “I’ve never been more sure of anything.”

With that, they surrendered to the moment. Their lovemaking was both urgent and tender, a perfect blend of passion and connection. Toto’s experienced touch and Y/n’s eager responses created a rhythm that felt both new and timeless. As they moved together, they spoke in whispers, sharing secrets and desires, each word deepening their bond.

Afterward, they lay tangled in the sheets, their bodies still humming from the intensity of their encounter. The sun had fully risen, casting a golden glow into the room. Toto brushed a strand of hair from Y/n’s face, his eyes filled with a softness she hadn’t expected.

“What happens now?” Y/n asked, her voice barely more than a breath.

Toto sighed contentedly, pulling her closer. “I don’t know. But I want to find out. I want to see where this can go.”

Y/n smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her chest. “Me too.”

They spent the rest of the morning wrapped in each other’s arms, talking and laughing, exploring the depths of their connection. They ordered breakfast to the room, savoring the simple pleasure of sharing a meal together. Each moment felt like a discovery, every touch a promise of something more.

As the city buzzed to life outside, Y/n and Toto remained in their bubble, oblivious to the world beyond the walls of the suite. 

______________________________________________________________

As noon approached, the reality of the world outside began to seep back in. They reluctantly dressed, but the ease between them remained. Toto watched Y/n as she moved around the room, a soft smile playing on his lips.

“You know, you could stay,” he suggested, his tone casual but his eyes hopeful.

Y/n turned to him, considering. “I’d love to, but I should probably get back to Sarah and James. They’ll be wondering what happened to me.”

Toto nodded, understanding. “Of course. But maybe we can meet again tonight? Dinner, perhaps?”

Y/n’s heart fluttered at the thought. “I’d love that.”

Toto walked her to the door, their fingers reluctantly parting. “Until tonight, then,” he said, pressing a gentle kiss to her lips.

“Until tonight,” Y/n echoed, stepping out into the hallway.

As she made her way back to her friends, she couldn’t stop smiling.

When she finally reunited with Sarah and James, they bombarded her with questions. Y/n laughed, sharing the highlights of her night, though some details she kept just for herself.

[fenrislorsrai]

The Crow Road

I did in fact read The Crow Road because of Good Omens and it was very meandering with a lot of character study. For a thing summarized as "trying to solve a mystery from papers left behind" it was very uninterested in doing so. It didn't even introduce them for first 100 pages, then didn't refer to them for another 100, then LOST THEM ON THE TRAIN. The book itself is mostly a distraction from solving actual mystery. In no way would I classify this as being Mystery, as in the genre. This is a family saga/coming of age thing. I did enjoy it, but if you're expecting a genre fiction thing, you will hate it.

ANYWAY.

Then we get to the last 20 pages or so of the book and OH MY FUCKING GOD

the rest of this is going under a cut for anyone who actually wants to read The Crow Road themself, but for everyone else, this is directly relevant to the end of season 2, episode 6 AND is NSFW

Toward end of book, MC Prentice figures out "oh, maybe I am actually in love with my best friend, Ash, I should tell here". Oh shit, she's taking a job and moving to Canada! FUCK. Well telling her now is not gonna do anything good here, I blew it.

Ash meanwhile comes to stay with him in his rented place before having to fly out in the morning. The place is tied up in an estate dispute. It has an enormous four poster bed in a room covered in naked paintings of Venus. And mirrors. Pointed at the bed.

They go out for dinner and have a conversation of who owes who for dinner and decide its neither. They walk around a little bit reminiscing about when they were in school. Prentice had once broken her nose with a snowball and thought she didn't know. She says she forgave him right away. It also turns out she knew he was using morse code to tap out rude things at their French teacher.

They get back to the house and she says she's going to turn in early. Goes to give him a kiss on cheek. WHich then turns into kissing. and grabbing ass. They head to the bedroom of Fucking to do just that.

have a couple round and then while tangled up doing effectively some cockwarming, Ash does a little rhymic squeezing via morse code to spell out I-L-U and he does some cock moving to spell out I-L-U-T she still gets up in morning to leave, tehre's that brief, but what if I convince you to stay??? and they basically both agree "no, this is a breakup for work." Ash goes off to do her work contract, Prentice is going to finish his degree and sell the Bentley he just inherited. The split is not forever.

I did not have love confession via morse code while fucking on my bingo card AT ALL.

But good god, that ending there and the kiss there at the end of season2. OH RIGHT, THEY BOTH HAVE DONE SPY STUFF!!! What the fuck are Aziraphale's hands doing? are they frenching with morse code? IF THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[necronatural]

Project Moon Discourse Part Whatever: Statement 2

Project Moon's company twitter has released a statement on their perspective.

In summary, the Youth Union who has been rallying a lot of people has been protesting about Vellmori's "unfair dismissal" (firing over previous statements). Project Moon points out that they have not fired her yet, and the YU do not have concrete proof of what happened (AKA why you have to say "alleged" when commenting on crimes yet to be tried). Youth Union discusses the private circumstances and apologizes for repeating accusations as fact.

Kim Jihoon posits here that this was a political conspiracy by the Youth Union to boost their position (they were a very very small group before all this), which the Project Moon User Association must a part of. He posts the draft the Youth Union drew up if PM complied, without the union rep's permission as evidence. OK man.

...By the way, he also sent an official legal notice to the Project Moon User Association with that same info.

The PMUA says hey man! We do talk to the Youth Union, but we're actually a completely different group who has not declared jackshit as fact and have been conscientious in our speech. Fuck you! And posted the letter (legal threat) PM sent publicly along with their reply. (Jihoon references this in the statement above).

Read here. The letter is the pdf at the top of the doc.

It's through this response that we learn that the reason the Youth Union was cowed was because Vellmori resigned.

The PMUA notes: hey, isn't it extremely fucking suspicious that you publicly stated that due to breaking company rules with years old tweets (this isn't legal btw) and Vellmori's most recent statement was that you told her that she's getting her papers in a week (legal but asshole shit btw)? And yet when you're catching heat about the ludicrously illegal unjust firing, you reveal you've been hiding her resignation? Unrelated, why did you post an unfinished draft statement predicated on a round table that never occurred? Why are you threatening us for libel we never posted?

AKA they fucking ate him for dinner.

Kim Jihoon is being cooked alive over his notes app malding & pointed translated repost of his original statement. Everyone and their dog can see his sole deflection only really applies to the Youth Union, who fucked up publicly a while ago, while the PMUA is spotless in their conduct. The fact they have not done anything but ask the Youth Union for info - which they used responsibly thus far - renders literally every complaint Kim Jihoon is making totally worthless. And they made sure he fucking knew it. Meanwhile, the folks who originally kicked off harassment and boycotts (DCInside) remains uncommented on, enraging people even further.

By the way, you may be wondering why Kim Jihoon is suddenly so frenzied in his attacks. The thing is, PMUA just successfully met their fundraising goal! And wouldn't you know it, the money they raised is for applying to file a class action lawsuit over PM's mismanagement.

Stay tuned for more on Crossy News Network. I am too nosy to possibly stop reporting on this

[bingoboingobongo]

omg i am in love with your writing ab ghost... would you ever do a fluff ab clingy drunk ghost where he starts off insisting that he can't get drunk and then he just escalates to being all over you ghejirb

alright so honestly i don't see ghost as being the kind of guy to drink enough to get him drunk when he's by himself, but when he's with soap? yeah, completely different story. it's not that he's more comfortable around soap or anything, it's just that he gets a rise out of beating soap in competitions.

here's how i see it. you guys have just completed a long ass mission, weeks of stress and labor are finally over so of course, you guys get drinks to celebrate. now i see soap as the kind of drunk who only wants to get more drunk, so once he's had a few drinks he starts going around trying to challenge everyone else to drinking competitions. pretty much everyone says no because the thing about soap is that he's so competitive he'll drink until he drops dead. you say no bc u don't feel like blacking out and because it's ur turn to be designated driver (lord knows that even sober ghost drives like he's drunk), so soap goes to the only person who 1. is more competitive than him and 2. has a shot at out drinking him: ghost.

now, years of working with soap have enlightened ghost to his usual idiocy, so ghost is quick to shut him down, telling him that he "would be fighting a losing battle."

but tipsy soap is persistent as hell, so he keeps bugging and bugging and bugging him. and at this point, ghost is pretty tired and is just waiting to go home, so to get soap to shut up he agrees. and of course, drinking ensues.

the first few rounds are easy, ghost doesn't even flinch as he downs the drinks like they're water. at this point, soap is starting to get intimidated, so he demands that ghost have a few extra drinks to get them on even ground, considering soap was already tipsy when they started. you and the rest of the team watch with awe (and horror) as ghost swallows down the drinks like they're nothing, and if you're being honest, you're really excited to see how this turns out. i mean, for one, when ghost drinks he flips up the bottom of his balaclava, exposing his chin and his lips. it's always exciting to watch ghost take off his mask, even if it's just part of his face, and secondly, the way he shoots you a glance as he drinks, his eyes dark and enticing, his adam's apple bobbing with each swallow, the smallest drop of lost alcohol that drips down his chin -- which he's quick to wipe away -- it sends a swarm of butterflies into your stomach. plus, you've never actually seen ghost drink this much, usually the most he'll have is a couple of beers or a few glasses of bourbon, so you're curious to see just how much of a tolerance he has.

the answer? a crazy high one. the two are at it for what feels like hours, and there's no clear effect on ghost. meanwhile, soap can barely walk straight and is on the verge of puking at any given moment. at this point everyone is trying to get soap to give up. price tried telling soap that there was no shame in tapping out, and when that failed, he tried threatening soap with extra chores. of course this does nothing, and soap only tells price to "fuck off" because he's not his dad. at one point, gaz tried physically pulling soap away, to which soap promptly tried (and failed) to hit him in the face. even you tried to get soap to stop, although you'll admit you didn't try very hard, like i said, you're very excited to see how this plays out.

after a certain point, soap's pretty much blackout drunk. he's barely hanging on but his pride won't let him let go, much to the annoyance of ghost and the others. and so, in a final finishing move, ghost asks the bartender for a bottle of whiskey, which -- to soap's despair and the rest of the team's horror -- he finishes in seconds.

for a while, everyone is silent, and then soap just busts into tears. he knows it's over, ghost knows it's over, everyone else knows it's over. i mean, you guys just watched ghost down the equivalent of sixteen shots of whiskey like it was nothing. by now, you're starting to wonder if you need to get 911 on speed dial because there's no way ghost doesn't die from alcohol poisoning.

but to your disbelief, ghost's fine. or so you thought. after his defeat of soap, ghost made his way over to your seat for a chat. not that you were complaining, you were curious to see just how incomprehensible ghost's speech would be, but to your surprise he's speaking great. his speech is clear and you suspect the alcohol's loosened him up a little, because he's talking and cracking jokes a lot more. if you're being honest, you really like this new, laid-back ghost who's not so worried about maintaining his stony exterior; this new ghost that's wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you into him, even though he never would have showed that kind of public affection to you in front of the team when he was sober. and it's not that he doesn't like you or he isn't proud of you, it's the complete opposite. he's absolutely bursting with pride that you decided to date him, but he's just always been wary about displaying his love for you in public. after all, you never know what kind of shady people are lurking around in bars, looking for ways to hurt him, or even worse, you.

but when his brain is muddled with alcohol, all that paranoia goes away and ghost is more than happy to be all over you. first it's just one hand around your waist, but then when you get up to order another iced water for soap he's tugging at your shirt and holding your wrists so you can't leave him, and when you tell him that you'll be back in less than a minute, he's standing up and chasing after you and wrapping his arms around you in a hug as you talk to the bartender. he's burying his face in the crook of your neck and telling you it's because all the alcohol is giving him a headache when really he just wants to smell you; he's running his hands up and down your legs when the rest of the team is looking the other direction; he's trying to mouth at your neck through his balaclava and whining when it doesn't work, causing you to grin and roll your eyes at him as you lift his mask just above his lips to help him. he's trying to whisper sweet nothings against your ear but they don't make sense because the way you smell is so intoxicating he feels like he's getting drunk all over again, but this time he's drunk on you.

and after a while, ghost finally passes out. he's essentially laying on top of you, his head resting on your chest as his back rises and falls with every breath. his arms are wrapped around you, essentially caging you into your seat and he's so heavy you need to call price over to help you pull him off so you can drive everyone home. and when you all arrive back at the base, you slowly nudge ghost awake, taking special note at the way his eyes flutter open slowly. and then he immediately closes his eyes again, digging his head into your chest because this time he actually does have a headache, and so it's up to you to bring him to his room. and the entire time he never ever lets go of his bear hug on you, leaving you to have to awkwardly waddle all the way to his room with him essentially draped over you. and then when he falls onto the bed he drags you down with him, and you try to pull away just for a second so you can change and wash your face, but ghost's got an iron grip on you and so you're stuck in his arms, not that you mind.

[muchanmocha]

Round 7 (and beyond)

I never intended on releasing a prediction post bc Team Vivinos is capable of excellent plot twists and there wasn't enough to go on imo to really have any solid guesses. But the recently released teaser gave me enough confidence in my current theories to put this out there. (Apologies if it's incoherent bc I'm basically just reposting a discord spiel I gave to an unfortunate friend a while ago lol.)

In sum:

Luka will be the winner of season 50 but Till won't die.

Bonus half-crack prediction:

Luka will win against Till, but Till won't die and Hyuna crashes the party to win season 50.

I can't recall the source but I believe Team Vivinos has mentioned that we're entering the main plot/part 2 of the story. Everything in this post is formulated based on this premise.

The artbook synopsis also seems to back up the claim that a bigger plot is coming.

Luka wins

Fairly sure Luka will win because that's his role. He is the epitome of this system. He is the symbol of Alien Stage. He cannot fall this easily.

Him maintaining his position at the top means he and the segyein enter part 2 with a strong presence.

Alien Stage may be fractured — 2 current participants have escaped to the rebels alive — but the system is still standing. It's scandalous, sure, but they have a winner and they will eventually go on to have Season 51.

Till survives

Till won't die because that's just weak sauce writing, plot, and character and we know Team Vivinos isn't capable of weak sauce writing, plot, and character.

Fact of the matter is, if Till dies in the next round he and his personal story will forever be overshadowed by Ivan's.

The climax of Round 6, Ivan's narrative and ending, it was executed so goddamn well. It was compelling. It was incredible. We are still not over it. And so—

There is nothing Till can do in the space of one episode ending in his death that can overpower Ivan's momentum from the previous episode. (Ofc everything in this series was somehow packed into 4 minute spurts that leave us emotionally wrecked so I am fully prepared to eat my words)

If Till dies here, regardless of what he does on stage before it happens, Till will be reduced to "the character who dies of guilt and regret after being the subject of someone else's obsessive love and sacrifice." He'll end up a passive player in his own story.

But if Till survives:

Till from here on out

Imo it would be FAR more interesting to see where his feelings and relationship with Mizi develops and shifts from here because Ivan has effectively tainted his idea of love.

Why do I say this?

Well Till's love for Mizi is... very innocent, very pure, very "first love"y. It's all things naive and fantastical and shoujo manga heart-shaped bubbles.

Meanwhile Ivan's love for Till is dark and gritty. It's obsessive. It's all things murky and ugly (I mean it in the best of ways don't come at me with your pitchforks) — the complete opposite of Till's impression of love.

Which makes it all the more impactful when Ivan forces Till to come face to face (literally) with that deep, obssessive love in Round 6 with his last moments.

After this incredibly traumatic eye-opener — an intimate, violent look into a different kind of love — I don't think Till can look at Mizi the same way again. (No not because he does or should be obligated to return Ivan's feelings, and that's a hill I'll die on regardless of pitchforks. If Till develops feelings for Ivan it should be on his own terms. If Till falls out of love with Mizi that should also be on his own terms.)

Hyuna wins Season 50 (jk)

Look it'll be funny.

Luka facing off against Till and then Hyuna crash the party, stomps him (vocally), effectively wins Season 50, and then yeets with Till and Mizi — one over each shoulder, hauled like sandbags.

(In all seriousness tho, not a very high chance of happening. They clearly have a lot of issues to sort out that'll prob happen later in part 2.)

"Never come back again"

The whole reason why this post is up. The caption for the new promo art gives me more confidence in the theory that everyone leaves except Luka.

'Never come back again.' I feel like there's a good chance this is Luka saying or thinking this to Hyuna (and co). If indeed it is, there's a lot to unpack there.

Tl;dr

Hyuna and Mizi busts Till outta there, Luka is left utterly alone seated on the throne again, Sua and Ivan eventually come back wrong to wreck emotional havoc as zombie androids

[snaillock]

this fandom dry as shitttttt cause why am i barely seeing anyone talk about the new trailer? i know there are people talking about it if you scroll enough through the blue lock tag but for an animanga fan base that just had a season 2 of it’s anime drop? it’s a whole damn desert up in here.

anyways here are my thoughts on the trailer and the upcoming season:

good god blue lock deserved a better studio if i’m being completely honest here.

i really really don’t like the harsh look of the dominant and completely black shadows. i feel like it just does not at all fit with the art style and just clashes weirdly. it just gives off the vibe of them trying something and just going too far with it.

ofc a lot of stuff about the art direction is pretty subjective and everyone can have their own thoughts about it. personally, i don’t enjoy it that much and a lot of the screencaps are pretty unappealing to look at.

also not sure if this is just me but i have always hated is how absurdly lean the characters’ bodies looked in the anime. not completely sure if this is a thing unique to this anime or not. in the manga, they obviously looked fit and athletic but it was still believable that they were teenage athletes that have only really played on a high school/local level. meanwhile the adaptation made it appear like they have 0% body fat and are completely dehydrated. they looked like they were on steroids or some shit. is ego over there sneaking tren into their bloodstreams when they’re sleeping? and it certainly does not look this pet peeve of mine will get any better in season 2.

anyways onto the more positive stuff i’m looking forward to:

one thing i am excited for is isagis final goal in the u-20 match. i love that specific chapter in the series and i do feel like they’ll put a lot of effort into that part since it’s a pretty significant moment. so yeah i do have hopes for that. same with rin’s backstory. based on the little clip of it in the trailer, it does seem promising and i bet they’ll do a good job on that as well since it is a defining moment for his character.

another thing im quite happy about is my pookie sae’s new design. i’m so happy they changed his look to reflect the manga art style improve post-second selection arc. he looks soooo goodddd!

i’m also hella excited for the additional times. i really enjoyed those the first time i watched the anime and definitely was a little sad when i found out they weren’t canon in the actual manga. so i can’t wait to see what they’ll add to the characters this round.

even if the new season does inevitably its noticeable flaws, i bet i still will be extremely hyped when watching just like with season one. this series doesn’t fail to make me feel like a typical sports bro in a bar whenever someone makes a goal. and you bet my ass will be tuning in (🏴‍☠️) each and every week.

[missadangel]

Little Bird in a Cage (Javier Peña x Reader)

Part 11: Payback (WARNING +18, Smut)

Gifs by javier-pena - smokahauntis - sigurism

---------------------------- All episodes here ------------------------

It was around 2 am when you knocked on the door to Javi's room. He opened the door with a smile, but he frowned as he saw you because you were wearing a very long black trench coat, a large backpack and...

‘Sunglasses at night?’

‘Sshhh,’ you shushed him and hurried inside.

Javi chuckled and closed the door. You took off the glasses and took a deep breath.

‘Good thing I didn't run into anyone.’

‘You don't think it's a little over the top?’

You rolled your eyes and put your bag on the floor, ‘I have to be cautious even if my dad is very busy since what happened.’

‘You look a bit funny,’ Javi said laughing and pointing at the trench coat you were wearing.

Without taking your eyes off him you took off the trench coat and threw it on the bed.

‘How do I look now?’

You were wearing a black satin slip mini dress with black lace garter socks underneath.

Javi was speechless, his heart started to race, he walked slowly towards you and put his hands gently around your waist.

‘You look gorgeous,’ he said and lowered his head looking into your eyes.

‘I love you, I'm sorry I couldn’t say it before,’ and then he started to run his lips over your face, first your cheeks, your ears, your neck. You felt your throat dried as his sweet breath caressed your whole face.

‘Why don't we have a drink first?’ you swallowed.

He raised his eyebrows.

‘Why are you so fond of alcohol these days?’

‘I think I'm addicted now, I drink every time I got stressed, I even tried cigarettes but-’

‘Cigarettes? You? Really?’

‘I couldn’t because I choked from coughing.’

Javi chuckled and poured a drink from the minibar into glasses for you and himself.

‘By the way, you don't smell of cigarettes anymore,’ you said, suddenly remembering.

He handed you the glass, ‘I've been using nicorette lately, but sometimes I really want to smoke, I cheated many times.’

‘It must be hard after all these years,’ you murmured, looking out of the window of the room.

‘Wow, you were right about the view,’ took a sip from your liquor.

Javi put his glass on the table and slowly approached you from behind, wrapping his arms around your waist. Then he took your glass and put it on the window sill.

Meanwhile he kept his other hand on your waist, apparently getting impatient. Then he started kissing your neck and you start to breathe heavily.

‘You have no idea how much I’ve missed you,’ he whispered. ‘Your chocolate hair, your thin long slim neck, your sweet caramel eyes sparkling like gems in the light, and your sugary lips,’ his finger rubs your lips.

‘Kiss me already,’ you said passionately, his words driving you crazy.

He did as you said, when your lips met, his moustache tickled your lips, you felt like you get electrocuted, and it was spreading all over your body.

The kiss got rougher and he lifted you onto his lap, your legs automatically wrapped around his waist as you both breathed only through your nostrils.

With you on his lap, still kissing you, he turned round and sat you on the bed, and lower himself down to your level, kneeling.

After his lips slip to your neck and then down he gently pushed you backwards. Then he lifted your legs up and put on his shoulders, you gasped with surprise. You were very excited and nervous as you had never experienced what he was about to do during sex before. His lips running on your panties now, his moustache kept tickled which made you real wet then he started to lick it and you bit your lip hard.

It was so good.

After licking down to the hem of your panties, he runs his fingers along the inside and takes it off. First, he starts licking and kissing your inner thighs, slowly moving to your wet pussy. He slowly starts to lick your clit and sucking. You leaned back, moaning in pleasure.

“God, Javi,” you moaned.

He smirked and started going faster. Pumping his two fingers in while licking hard. This feeling made you moaning like a stray cat, no one has ever made you feel such pleasure.

“Please Javi,” you begged.

He smirked “So impatient.”

You sat up in bed and looked at him, grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him hard while unbuttoning and taking it off.

And suddenly he's on top of you, kissing your neck. You moaned and press your pelvis against him. You ask for more without speaking. Your pulse raised when he grabbed the strap of your dress and peeled it down to your waist.

Your eyes on his muscles, run your hands over his belly and greedily grabbed his belt.

"So this is what you want, huh?" he murmured, smiling crookedly.

“I want you Javi,” you whispered his ear.

You undo his belt and, following it, immediately the buttons of his pants. He quickly got rid of his pants.

Then kissed you roughly, challenges you and bites your lip a little. You pull pillows to the side pushing away and moan as his cock enters you. You throw your head back and move up and down, holding onto his shoulders. His hands are on your hips, on your waist, on your back, on your breasts... His hands were everywhere.

You lean up to touch his chest and wrap your arms around his muscled shoulders.

He moans when you move and looks down at you, the change of position feeling even tighter on his cock. You kiss his neck. He leans down to place both hands on the bed surface with you still wrapped around him.

He presses his forehead against yours, grabs your hips and gets even more rough in his movements.

“I'm so close,” you barely whispered.

“Me too baby,” he moans and closes his eyes as the pleasure builds up. He rubs your breasts with one hand while the other one stays grabbing your hips, which made you enjoyed a lot.

He goes impossibly faster as he struggles to keep up the pace and finally you both scream in pure pleasure as Javi sucks and bites your chin and you scratch his back with your nails. The wave washing over you is heavy, intense. You both have never felt such an extreme release.

“You’re amazing Javi,” you were panting.

 He kissed your neck, also panting. This wasn't nearly the experience he had with other women.

This was fucking amazing, he thought.

'I love you, Javi,' your voice caresses his ears.

He propped himself up on his elbow, leaning over you kisses you softly.

“I love you too, hermosa.“ He kisses you again, your lips, your nose, your neck, top of your shoulders make you feel like you’re the happiest woman alive.

After a while you had go to the bathroom to pee and take a quick shower, he accompanied you.

-----

‘So you wouldn't have come if you didn't think I was pregnant?’

‘I wanted to, but I didn't think I had the right to force you to come with me.’

In the early hours of the morning you were lying in bed together, talking about everything, chatting. You put your head on Javi's chest and he put his arm around you.

‘You thought I wouldn't come with you?’

You looked at him curiously, you didn't know he thought like that, you thought he would go on with his life without caring about you.

Javi turned his head to you.

‘If I asked you to come to Texas with me a few days before the wedding, would you accept? I don't have a fancy house there like you grew up in, I live with my dad in a small house, and I didn't think I could give you the comfortable life you're used to.’

Your eyes filled with tears, you realized how selfish you were thinking, you were not the only one whose suffering. It must have been a difficult process for him as well.

You touched his face with your hand.

‘Javi, I would go anywhere with you, I want you, I'm happy when I’m with you.’

Javi smiled and kissed you.

‘I can't be without you anymore either, the days without you felt like something was missing. And I don't want to feel incomplete anymore.’

You kissed him back and then sat up to hug him. As he began to kiss you more eagerly, he grabbed your hips and slid you onto his lap, wrapping his strong arms around your back and waist. It was so nice to hold him like that with both of you naked, the feeling of your breasts against his strong, muscular chest, that you never wanted it to end.

You didn't want to think about anything else but the two of you, unfortunately life goes on outside this room.

There was a knock on the door made you both stopped and looked at there.

‘Jav, we need to talk, are you awake?’

You blushed when you heard Steve's voice, you were so embarrassed.

‘Coming,’ Javi kissed you on the top of the head before getting out of bed. He grabbed his pants from floor and quickly putting them on. You pulled the sheet over your head burying yourself in.

Javi chuckled and hurried to the door.

‘What's up man? Something wrong?’

Steve looked him up and down.

‘Shit, sorry, wrong time?’

‘It's okay, you tell me what happened.’

‘We've been called in for a statement, we need to go to the station.’

Javi frowned. ‘A statement?’

‘The president was attacked and same day we arrived by DEA plane. And we were coincidentally at the same wedding. Apparently the Colombian government has launched a full-scale investigation and is considering every possibility.’

When you were under the sheet, you heard everything, you were angry and worried.

‘Come on, get dressed and meet me at the lobby, the plane will take us to Bogotá, we have to make a statement at the headquarters,’ Steve said suggestively with his eyes, Javi rolled his eyes.

‘Fuck this man.’

Steve patted him on the shoulder and when he left, Javi closed the door.

‘We'll be apart again,’ you sneered. Javi came over and sat on the bed, touched your cheek.

‘Don't worry, we'll just make a statement, it's better to go there and as much as I don't like the ambassador, he'd back us up.’

‘And then what? Will you come back here?’

‘Not sure, what about you, how long will you stay at the hotel?’

‘I mean, I was supposed to fly to Hawaii for my honeymoon today, but...’

Javi glared at you.

‘But, since I can't go, I think we'll stay in a hotel for a while. I must go to my room to talk Caroline and Dolores.’

‘Okay, I can reach you by hotel phone,’ he smirked.

‘What are you going to tell them? I want to meet the bride who couldn’t get married yesterday, or what?’

‘The bride I seduced yesterday and made her mine,’ he said, rubbing your cheek as your face turned red.

‘I love this colour of your face,’ he said and kissed your cheek, then stood up.

‘Oh, Javi your back!’

‘Hm?’

There were scratches on his back, like cat scratches, and suddenly you felt embarrassed.

‘Did I do that?’

Javi looked at his back in the mirror, smiling.

‘Yes, my naughty gatita.’

You giggled as he leaned down and kissed your lips then pulled back and walked to the wardrobe to get dressed.

You had to get dressed too, so you stood up and took your clothes out of your bag. Javi was surprised to see that you were wearing sportswear.

‘I thought if I got caught I'd pretend I was out for a morning jog,’ you explained.

‘You seem to be an expert at that,’ he grinned.

‘Thanks to my detail-orientated, inquisitive father.’

When you finished getting dressed, you kissed Javi and left the room, and he followed you out. You felt sad that you were going to be apart from now on, no idea when he will be back. When you came to your room couldn’t find anyone.

Caroline was staying in the room with you so you wonder where she was, so you decided to go for real walk or jog.

The lobby of the hotel was quiet, you were thankful that you didn't see Felipe or anyone else from his family. You approached the door and the attendant opened it for you, you were going down the stairs when suddenly a few people approached you, they had cameras in their hands. You got surprised.

“There she is!

“Get on the record now.”

Someone handed you a microphone. “Senorita Y/N Botero Llano, what do you have to say about the tragedy that befell the president at your wedding?”

You were just standing there, couldn’t step back.

“Will you postpone your wedding?” someone else asked.

“Have your father said anything about the president, can you inform us about his condition?” another man asked.

Suddenly Felipe came in with security and grabbed you by the arm and pulled you inside.

“Are you crazy? It's a bad time to go outside.”

“What do you mean I'm locked up in the hotel?”

“Makes two of us.”

“Great!”

That's all that you need.

Caroline ran to you through the lobby. “Where have you been, were you with h-”

Suddenly you made a gesture with your eyes for her to shut up, and Felipe was frowning at you. Caroline smiled fakely.

“Ah, I mean, I was going to say, where did you go out of the room so early in the morning?”

“I was going for a walk, but the reporters-”

“Yes, they came early in the morning in a hurry.”

“You know we have to give them an explanation sooner or later, right?” Felipe said in a weird tone.

You rolled your eyes at him.

“Maybe we'll just call off the wedding, isn't that an option?”

“My family, my relatives, your relatives, none of them matter to you?

They really didn't.

“No,” you said, not looking at him. “I didn't want to get married anyway, remember?”

Felipe got angry.

“Okay, maybe I'll go and tell the journalists that you cheated on me, it'll be an interesting story, don't you think?”

A wave of anger swept through your body.

“Felipe, what the-” You silenced Caroline by raising your hand, looking at him got curious what he meant.

“I saw you with him last night,” he said, then lowered his voice and continued. “I'm not stupid, I know you spent the night with him.”

You sighed. “So? What do you think will happen if you go and tell the journalists? You just gonna humiliate yourself.”

“I don't know who would be more humiliated, me or you. After all, you are the minister's daughter. Guess the headline, 'Wedding canceled because the minister's daughter slept with famous Agent Javier Peña same night as supposed to be her wedding night.”

You slapped him hard in the face. Everyone in the lobby looked at you.

“You asshole! Don't you dare mention his name!”

Felipe looked at you menacingly.

“If you don't come with me and tell the journalists that we're postponing the wedding for now, I'll humiliate you and him all over Colombia!”

Your eyes filled with anger, and as you were thinking what to do, you realized that he was even angrier than you. You ran after him as he was heading the outer door, you wanted to grab his arm but your foot caught on the edge of the seat in the lobby and you fell, you had managed to grab his arm as you fell but now it looked like you were begging him.

You got up quickly, it was hard to decide which was more frustrating, the strange looks of the people in hotel or Felipe's threat against you.

“Are you okay?” Caroline came running over and examined your foot.

“Yeah, I think I hurt it a bit,” you staggered.

“Look, don't name him, okay, you can blame it on me, but don’t give his name,” you said, Felipe crossed his arms in a relaxed manner.

“Okay, are you going to tell them we postponed the wedding?”

“She just hurt her foot, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Caz,” you said, shushing her. “Fine, I'll do it," you hissed.

“Don't, Y/N,” Caroline grabbed your arm. You patted her hand making her calm.

Then you turned to Felipe.

“But I have one condition, I'll do it after my father comes back,” you said, you were absolutely sure that he wouldn't like this.

Your father has never wanted you in the news, politically or socially. Felipe was playing with fire.

“Deal,” he said, smiling, thinking he has won, but the real winner was you.

------

It was almost noon when Javi and Steve's plane arrived in Bogotá. First they visited the ambassador, then the DEA headquarters. According to the information, one of the assailants has been shot at the scene and the other was captured alive. He was in the interrogation room waiting to be questioned. According to his file, he was a Colombian citizen and had connections to all the cartels, so it was DEA's job.

It was the supervisor who specifically asked Javi and Steve to interrogate the attacker. Which this is on their benefit because it was very strange that these two agents should have finished their work in this country and go back to their homeland long ago, but for some reason this attack happened on the day of their unexpected return.

Steve and Javi stood outside the door to the interrogation room.

‘Just like old times, eh?’ Steve grinned at him.

‘Yeah, I fucking missed it.’ Javi grunted.

When they opened the door and walked in, the assailant was handcuffed to a chair and had taken quite a beating.

‘Oh, shit,’ Javi said sarcastically. ‘Some cops have no mercy when it comes to the president?’

Steve laughed and glanced down at the his file.

‘José Fedor Rey, ex-guerrilla member also ex Cali Cartel member, and your list of crime is as long as a fucking christmas tree at Northgate Mall.’

The world's tallest christmas tree was at Northgate Mall in 1950.

‘According to an ex-guerrilla, you're a bad shot for wounding the president in the arm,’ Javi said, flipping through the crime scene investigation files. ‘Guess it wasn't your day, huh?’

Jose grinned, but he didn’t care to say anything.

Javi pulled up a chair and sat opposite him. Steve was standing right next to him. They both trying to get something out of this dangerous criminal and they were just getting started.

‘Why did you target the president? You've got to give me something or you're going to jail and I'm afraid you won't last a day in prison as an ex-guerrilla, an errand boy for the Cali cartel.’

Javi hadn't mentioned prison in Colombia, and Jose tensed when he realised this.

‘I'm a citizen of this country, it's my right to serve my sentence here.’

‘Look Jav, he can talk,’ Steve said sarcastically. ‘I don't think you realise how famous you are, you're on the FBI's most wanted list, which means the US has the power to prosecute and imprison you.’

‘Fuck you, you can't do that,’ he shouted.

‘You're a member of a cartel and attacked the Colombian president and shot him, don't you think that's reason enough?’ it was Javi's turn to push him.

‘President wasn't the target,’ he muttered.

‘What did you say?’ Javi and Steve looked at him curiously, it was their turn to tense up.

‘You guys think you're so clever but I don't think you're getting the point, the reason we chose the wedding day was because the target was the Minister of Defense. But the damn president wouldn't shut up to finish his speech, I had one chance when the minister came up to him but the president decided to hug him and the moment I fired he raised his damn arm.’

Javi got angry and he and Steve looked at each other.

‘Why did you target the minister?’ Steve continued.

‘He broke the deal, everything happened because of him, he promised Miguel and the others, all of us.’

Then he looked at Javi.

‘If he hadn't reinstated you, Agent Peña, Miguel wouldn't have been caught, the plan was perfect. No one would have caught Miguel but you. Everything happened because of him, and you. Then we had a chance when we got the girl, but you saved her, you ruined everything. We’ve lost many men.”

‘Oh you're breaking my fuckin heart,’ Javi growled angrily.

‘What time is it?’ Jose asked.

Steve was confused.

‘Why the fuck are you asking me what time it is?’

‘It's probably mid-afternoon, which means my team should be finishing up the loose ends soon.’

Javi angrily grabbed him by the collar.

‘What the fuck does that mean? What team?’

José just laughed wickedly, ‘You're about to find out what it's like to be on the losing side.’

Javi punched him in the face hard and José fell down to the floor with the chair, before he could look up Javi grabbed his throat.

‘Tell me what you're planning! Where's your team? What are they gonna do?’

Steve tapped Javi on the shoulder, he was worried too.

‘Tell me, fucker!’ he pressed his hands angrily against his neck and shook him, probably killing him if Steve hadn't grabbed his hands and pulled him away.

José coughed and breathes hard, then began laughing.

‘Santa Marta,’ he said, ’it's probably too late now, Agent Peña.’

Javi kicked him angrily while he was still on the ground, made him lose his consciousness.

‘Javi, we don't have time, we have to get to the plane now. Come on, man.’

Javi nodded, anxiety has taken over his body. They rushed out of the building to get on the same plane they have arrived. Supervisor couldn't understand what had happened, but he got it was an emergency.

[trulycertain]

Blankets

In which the shadow-cursed lands are freezing, Lora's undead boyfriend is shivering, and she decides there's only one solution: hug that vampire. And bring blankets. Meanwhile, Astarion gets to further discover the joys of non-sexual intimacy.

Sappy fluff on those lines Astarion has about cuddling, and about missing his partner's body heat. Act 2, after his big "I like you" confession. 3.1k. Ao3

The shadow-cursed lands have a certain character. It's a menacing, get-the-fuck-out-of-here character, but it's definitely a character. The dark and the weather - or lack of it - have a feel all their own.

"Who gave this place permission to be so damned freezing?" Astarion's trying to keep his usual stiff-necked poise, even slouched by the fire, but the cold's starting to defeat him. Hunting helped for a while, it was obvious, and it'd probably be a lot worse if he hadn't fed, but nothing seems to keep the cold at bay for long. His mouth is working as he tries not to let his teeth chatter - probably a lot worse with fangs.

"Blame Shar," Gale mutters, daring to without Shadowheart close by, and Lae’zel snorts. “But tonight is frigid even for this cursed place.”

Astarion pulls the blanket tighter round himself - worn but thick wool, with a little embellished, almost fleur-de-lys border in delicate gold thread. Somehow that hasn't unravelled. The rest is drabber than his usual style, though needs must, Lora supposes. But there's a pink patch, one she swears she sewed more haphazardly...

Wait. Lora knows that blanket. It used to be one of hers. It's the worn one she dropped outside his tent the first night they camped together - when he'd spent the journey muttering about the mud and the lack of baths, she'd spent it letting his snotty insults roll off her back, and she'd woken up the next morning to find said blanket had... mysteriously disappeared. That was months ago.

The thread's new.

“Damn this,” Astarion mutters, before she can muck everything up by saying something. “I'm turning in. Wake me up if we're all eaten by shadow undead.” And then he stalks to his tent, blanket thrown over his shoulders like a stereotypical vampire's cape; she watches him go in concern.

“Goodnight?” Gale manages.

Silence falls, even more than usual in the Shadowlands. Gale coughs. Wyll stirs the fire with a stick. Lae’zel sharpens her sword just a little more pointedly.

Lora lasts perhaps two minutes before she's grabbing a fur and an extra blanket from her tent - firmly ignoring the curious amusement she can feel from the other side of the fire - and sidling into Astarion's vaguely hedonistic lair, stepping past blood jars and haphazard books.

Astarion’s already reclining on an elbow, of course; he heard her coming. “Oh? Didn't know you were feeling frisky. At least it might warm us both up.”

Even though it's a joke, any coquettish effect is  mostly ruined by the three layers he's wearing - undershirt peeking out from under his collar, another shirt, and some kind of robe he must have stolen along the way - and his miserable little nest of blankets. And the subtle redness to his nose, the tension in his shoulders to stop the shakes. Gods, there’s barely anything here, for all the treasure trove outside his tent. He’s all but slee – trancing on the ground. Elf or not, he’s got to be freezing.

Lora shakes her head, sliding to her knees next to him. “You're shivering.”

“Of course I'm not. Am I?” Astarion looks down at himself and sighs. “I suppose I am.” He is. Vigorously. “How are you not?” he adds, in confused disgust.

Lora throws the extra covers over him. And then she wriggles half out of his tent, ignoring the fact that Wyll is now leaning round Gale to watch, and returns with half of Astarion’s cushion stash.

“Is that why you're here? To make a delivery?” That arch voice is muffled through wool, until a pale hand pulls it away from his face and Astarion blinks at her owlishly. Well, half owl, half very disgruntled sheep. The pomade’s starting to lose the fight against blanket friction, flyaway curls sneaking back into shape. It’s... sweet.

“If you want. But I thought I'd ask if we could share,” she says, gesturing to his bedroll.

He blinks at her, sobering. “I thought we'd spoken about, ah…”

Is it patronising to be proud of him? Probably. It doesn't change the fact she is, terribly, even while guilt for how they started is trying to squeeze the breath out of her.

A hand to her heart, Lora says, “No funny business. On my mother's life.”

Astarion squints at her, amused but with the tiniest hint of wariness underneath. “You don't have a mother.”

Sombrely now, eyes steady on his, she says, “On my lyre.”

Those little lines start around his brows - he's frowning, trying to work her out. And then, like so many small moments over this journey, she sees the second he decides to trust her. With an incline of his head, Astarion says, “Accepted.” He blinks, and snorts. “But darling, it's not as if I have an excess of body heat to give. If anything, quite the opposite. I'll, ah, leech from you.” He tries to grin fangily through the shivers, and then it occurs to him. “...Ah. You were trying to save my dignity, weren't you?” He sighs, and untucks a corner of his blanket pile, dragging a cushion or two under his head and turning away from her. It's the nearest to an invitation she's likely to get.

Unable to watch him in his misery any more, Lora swiftly ties the tent flaps, tries not to bolt into his absurd nest of cushions, and tucks herself in. “Oh. These are soft,” she says, plumping one. Silk. Shouldn't even ruin her hair too badly.

Astarion huffs a laugh at that - mostly silent, but she spots the movement of his shoulders.

Slowly, loudly, she shuffles closer and puts an arm round him; Hells, below wool and linen, he's absolute ice. He makes the smallest noise and stiffens, shoulder blades like shelves against her.

Lora lets go, instantly - but there's a hand snaking to her hip before she can shuffle backwards, pulling her to him.

Astarion murmurs, “I was just startled, that's all. You're so warm.” His tone is wondering - and then embarrassment at himself catches up with him. He goes tense all over again, but Lora just re-wraps an arm round him; curls the rest of herself round him too, knees against his knees, hips against his hips, chest to back.

It's the softest breath he lets out, almost inaudible. He tries, “This is ridiculous. It's not as if we're in some snowy wasteland.”

She says, “No light. No heat.”

“Hm. You know, once I would have said something like, ‘You're all the light I need. A lone star in the darkness.’”

With a laugh, she puts her nose against his shoulder. “Isn't that meant to be you? Considering the name, and all.”

“Shh. Don't ruin my metaphor. It took me a whole five seconds to think of it.” It's a slow thaw, the way he's melting against her as he speaks: bit by bit, inch by inch.

Lora sniggers against his robe.

Where her hand rests on his chest, she feels slim, strong, freezing fingers join it. Astarion says, softly, “I won't say I don't miss the sun. But you… help. You're so - ugh - colourful. And warm.” His head ducks, and then her hand’s being lifted to cool, gentle lips. He lays a kiss to her knuckles.

Lora’s chest fills with something that makes her realise she's a terrible bard, because she's uncertain how to describe so very much. She kisses a pointed ear - it twitches the tiniest bit in his surprise, barely there and in a way that would likely irritate him if he knew.

“It's probably the big glowing mace,” Astarion grumbles, carefully ruining the compliment - belied by how gently his hand’s still holding hers. That first time is still fresh and new: the way he took her hand like it was a precious thing. How pleased he was just to hold and be held. His grousing is relaxed, half swallowed by his pillow.

Many wouldn't say he's an ideal partner for cuddling: he's all sharp angles and sharper elbows, albeit ones dulled by his clothing. He's freezing marble except for where his hair tickles her nose. But his toes twitch against her shins and his voice is a low rumble where she rests, and he fits in her arms like they were made for it. Lora knew these strong shoulders and these long limbs would be good for something, and apparently that something was holding a short, slowly warming undead elf.

For all he's not tall, he's long, somehow: elegant limbs with a deceptive amount of strength hidden underneath. She'd thought the first time they slept together he was all lean muscle and sinew; now she realises he was starving. It just takes longer in a vampire. There's a solidity to him now under her hands: his shoulders are the slightest bit broader, his thighs a little less skinny. Lora wants, all over again, to tell the man she met in that clearing not to do this: to go hunting with her instead. To ask for a bit of her blood. To take her hand. Not that he would have listened.

“You've gone all tense,” Astarion remarks. “Have I done something?” His voice is on the knife-edge of casual.

Yes. No.

She swallows. “It's so quiet here. The birds don't sing. I feel exposed when I do. The silence leaves you with your thoughts - not always the good ones.”

“Mm.” All at once there's a small hurricane of movement next to her - before she quite knows what's happening, he's eeled out of her grasp and turned to face her. “Luminis,” he says, softly, all cut-glass enunciation; close to where they've bedded down, a jar - empty, thankfully - illuminates. He takes his fingers away from it.

Scarlet eyes search her face. It felt easier to hide in the half-dark, even though he could see her perfectly well… Oh. The light isn't for him, is it? His fragile mortal lover, so small in the grand scheme of things.

The words spill from her mouth unbidden, and she wonders, for far from the first time, how she ever became a bard. “I, ah, I get on edge, in this place. You said I was… colourful.”

“It's a bard thing, I'm sure.” Astarion’s voice is wry, but there's a crease of what looks like concern between his brows; he’d be appalled if it was pointed out.

“Here, that feels like I'm a target. I feel watched all the time.”

Grimacing, he says, “Ugh. Awful, isn't it? It's not just you.” But it's less theatrical than it would be with the others. More honest.

Astarion eases closer to her, hair falling over his forehead but eyes still dark and curious on hers - and something like realisation is dawning on his face. He always knows someone's soft spots. Lora wants to crawl away, to make some pleasant joke to distract them both; she makes herself be brave and stay, instead.

He places a hand on her arm, lightly, uncertainly, as if real tenderness is a song he's heard so many times but he isn't sure how to play by ear - and then he cups her face, still with a tentative hand. There's no laughter in his voice when he speaks. “Lora, darling, are you scared?”

“Aren't you?” she says, sounding small and helpless and hating every second of it.

Astarion barks a laugh, seeming to startle them both. “Love, we're all terrified of this place. Karlach’s spent half the journey quaking in her fiery little boots. Gale seems to be reading so he doesn't scream. But you're always so… cheerful.” He strokes his thumb over her cheek, again with a slow lightness to it, as if he's ready to move away the moment she says something, as if he might be overstaying his welcome. As if it isn't keeping her grounded. Sadness is in the tight lines around his eyes, his mouth. “I thought you'd sublimated it all into jokes and anger. Or perhaps that's just me.” He gives her a grin that's almost sheepish, by his pointedly-confident standards. Sobering, he says, “I should have seen through a fellow liar.” That's too gentle, too worried to have any sting to it.

The words are so hard to find. “Having someone with me helps. To watch this place back. You've got the fastest eye of any of us.”

Amusement flits over his face, his eyes skating to her throat. “I didn't think you'd want these fangs so close to your neck.” Double-edged, with the barest hint of real fear under there, the way so many of his offhand jokes are.

“They have been enough times before. You” - she clears her throat, and tries not to feel ridiculous - “you look after me?”

Astarion blinks a moment, eyes widening. “I do, do I?” He's trying for wryness, but his voice has something else to it. Something raw, but she can't tell if it's good or bad.

Lora says, hastily, with a demented kind of mildness, “Usually by stabbing things that are trying to kill me. And you can see in the dark, and I can't. And you slee - trance less.” And the shadows are less frightening when met with a wry voice and flamboyant arm-waving. And she's learned to feel him at her back, even when she can't see him.

She wants to squirm, but he's leaning to catch her eye. He says, with a disbelieving half-smile, “My dear, are you saying you feel safe with me?”

Lora sighs explosively, ready to be laughed at -

“Gods, I really have taken up with a madwoman.” But the words are softer than they should be, and he… tugs her into his arms, and holds her tightly.

Oh.

Lora freezes - he does, too, as if scared he might have overstepped his bounds. She wraps an arm round his waist before he can decide that she must hate this and he should run away again, her head settling onto his shoulder. He's warmer, she's glad to note, the shivers gone entirely. Still not as warm as someone alive, but getting closer to his normal.

Astarion says, “I'll keep the shadows at bay. You just focus on keeping me warm.”

“I can do that,” she says, faintly.

“Can I take away the light?”

“Sure. It's not the dark that worries me. It's… being alone, in the silence.”

Astarion throws the tent back into darkness with a whispered word - and then stays there: chest against hers and legs tangled, breathing every so often out of habit instead of necessity. A hundred little sounds even in a man as consummately quiet as him, from that to the brush of his clothes against pillows. Lora feels him start to stroke her hair with that careful touch, uncertain of his welcome; she hums happily, and he keeps it up. It's worth a little extra work in the morning for this.

A memory winds slowly back into her head: a man who'd give her florid nicknames and yet all but flee after sex, their arrangement going mostly unspoken. The second time, and that touch on her hair, so oddly uncertain for a man that confident in bed. She hadn't understood it at the time.

All I had to do was not fall for you.

Astarion turns his head, breath cool on her ear. “Lora?”

“Mm?”

“Thank you.”

“Mmhm." It's vague, said into his hair.

She feels him laugh faintly against her.

When Lora wakes to the morning light, she's somehow spooning him again; his forearm is wrapped around hers, holding her there, but he’s contorted himself to lean a book next to him so he can read.

Wait. That wasn’t in his tent last night. Lora tries to get her mind around the image of him sneaking out of bed, getting a book, and sneaking himself back in under her arm. Somehow, it makes a worrying amount of sense.

Astarion lets go of her the moment he senses she's awake, saying idly, “Have you ever considered a second career as a backpack?”

“How long have you been thinking of that one?” she mumbles, only realising she's nuzzling her nose into his hair when she gets tickled.

The book snaps shut, and Astarion pushes it aside with three fingers. “Is your pillow talk always so cynical? What's wrong with a good sweet nothing?” But he turns to her, a glint of amusement in his eyes.

For a moment Lora just lies there in some sort of disbelief, because she knows how nights with Astarion end. She wakes up alone, with only a bite mark to say anything happened at all, or there’s some convenient excuse he pulls out to sneak away.

But there’s a man in her arms, now, running a little cool for a mortal but not the block of ice he was – his hair wildly curly, his movements soft and slow and easy, the tiniest satisfied hum running through him as he eases into her embrace. “Gale is skulking about, making breakfast,” he says into her shoulder.

“Sounds good.”

“No, it sounds terrible. You’re better than a furnace. The bastard can show off to everyone else, but I’m keeping you.”

“Just for warmth,” Lora says.

“Obviously.”

“Are you warmer?”

His voice is a wry drawl, but something content is sneaking in around the edges. “Toasty, darling.”

Lora strokes a hand over Astarion’s back, over the layers of nightshirts and robes. For the barest moment he tenses – whether it’s because of his scars, or whether he thinks she’ll touch him somewhere less innocent, try to push his limits. She doesn’t, and he makes that faint content sound under his breath and goes loose again, his nose against her neck, curls tickling her cheek. It all feels like an impossibility that’s half a dream, like capturing the moon in a bucket of water, or...

A throat’s cleared outside the tent.

“Gale?” Lora says.

Through the tent, a wizardish shadow gazes awkwardly up at the sky. “I see. I shan’t ask if you’re decent in there. I somehow doubt I wish to know.”

Astarion mumbles, mouth still half against her skin, “If you untie that tent flap, I will kill you.”

“Ahem. It occurs to me that only one of you needs food – well, until I perfect that Waterdhavian blood pudding recipe. All the same, I’ve made a porridge with honey and almonds. Whenever you’re ready.”

Lora’s stomach growls just at the sound of that; she tries not to be embarrassed.

Astarion says, with the faintest fond undertone to it, “Ugh, mortals.” Rolling away from her, he adds, “Go, darling. It’s best never to deny your hunger.” He grins at her, and it’s full of teeth – but it softens as he adds, “And if you need further protection from the night’s shadows, you know where I am.”

 

She does. But it’s Astarion who sneaks into her tent the next night, a couple of ragged blankets tossed round his shoulders. She shifts to make room, opens her arms, and he fits himself between them like it was where he was always meant to be. Perhaps it was.

[have-you-seen-my-sanity]

Little Bunny 7

Yandere William Afton/Steve Raglan x reader

Dead dove do not eat! - you will get exactly what's in the tags!

Tags: FNAF, mature themes, description of injury, blood, wound treatment, obsessive behavior.

William returned into the Pizzeria. Entering the supply storage, he rounded the springlocks back in place. It took him some time to do it because of the parts on his arm that pierced his flesh, but eventually he got it and started to remove the suit.

After removing the suit, he got a first aid kit, rolled his sleeve up, grabbed a cloth and wrapped it around his arm just below his elbow to slow down the blood flow through the area, he got some sterile gauze pads and pressed them onto the blood leaking wounds before bandaging his arm up. After making sure his arm was treated William left the Pizzeria.

Meanwhile you and your friend were back Home and having a discussion,

"After you told me your story I think it would be wise to call the police." Your friend suggested

"What should I tell them? I got attacked by an animatronic in an abandoned Pizzeria, kicked it in the arm and it started bleeding? They would immediately think I am mentally insane." You made clear and your friend took a deep breath before continuing

"Listen...Mr. Raglan told you about those springlock suits. If you tell the police, they will check the whole place, find the suit and if there's blood left then they will for sure analyse it to see who it belongs to."

You thought about the possibility but then a doubt came in,

"But what if the guy took the suit? Trust me I haven't seen this suit at the first night after looking around the place."

Your friend sighed, "True, but what if we tell Mr. Raglan about this? I'm sure he will come up with anything." she suggested as you frowned,

"The owner of the place already improved the security, I don't think he will improve it even further.",

"Okay, hold on a second. I will come with you tomorrow, we would be two and could inspect the place. And if that guy shows up again, we will kick that guy's ass and get him arrested this time." your friend suggested and you thought about it before agreeing with a nod.

----------

4th Night.

12 AM.

You sat inside the office, watching the security cameras while your friend walked around the place. She checked the whole place, even parts and service but couldn't find any trace of the suit, not even blood. So she got back to the office as soon enough the Animatronics came out once again. They were curious about your friend but other than that, they kept you company.

It was 5:30 AM and that's when you realized something suspect.

"You know what's weird? The first night the animatronics showed up. The second night the animatronics didn't show up, and that's when I was attacked. The third night, they showed up for about 2 hours but left again. Then the Yellow Rabbit attacked me. I remember hiding inside Pirate Cove and Foxy was like- deactivated. And now the Animatronics came to us once again and no signs of that yellow freak." You explained to her as she paused to think,

"So you're telling me whoever attacked you deactivated the Animatronics before he went inside here? Or- uhm- controls them somehow?" She gave you a confused look and frowned.

You sighed and shook your head a little bit, "To be honest I don't know." you answered as soon enough it was 6 AM and both of you made your way home.

----------

William was watching on his laptop again, still furious at you for the stunt you pulled on his arm. He went to his bathroom, slowly unrolling the bandages, removing the gauze pads and turned on the water to wash dirt out of the rather deep flesh wounds, then dried his arm lightly before renewing the gauze pads and wrapping the bandages back around his arm to keep the wound cleaned.

As William was done he went to his bedroom, taking some pills for the pain and going to sleep as his thoughts were filled with how he could make you pay for what you did to him and most importantly:

Making you his.

[subwaytostardew]

Subway to Stardew - Passenger Events - Saloon Part 2

This plays after you see the first saloon event (submas having lunch with Elliott!) and visit on a Friday after reaching 3 hearts with Elesa.

Commentary under the read-more!

Did you notice the sprites? No? Great! I finally stopped procrastinating and recolored their spritesheets so now they don't share the same brown outline and match vanilla style a bit more!

Sprite-wise... they're over 80. Emmet's in his 90's.

So many sprites.....

Also... Elesa's back! We have a basic outline for what would happen in Elesa's events, but we haven't written anything for her yet... She has plans though! She's rounding up all the artists for it. Meanwhile, submas are still struggling with passenger relations.

Elesa's storyline is going to be fun to plan out but one of her B plots is making sure Ingo and Emmet take their breaks!

Elesa's fun. She's a bit awkward herself (girl can NOT keep a secret for the life of her) but she's doing things. Nimbasa trio share a braincell and they pass it around throughout this event.

We wanted to show a little more insight into their life in the valley and how others feel about them. This time, you're catching them on a bad day. One of my favorite things about Stardew is how everyone is very much flawed in some way and everyone is an unreliable narrator. I love how it just presents life in a run-down town as is and it's up to you to interpret whatever glimpses you get.

Trying to merge the two different media's in terms of tone and seriousness is a bit complex. Pokémon - as a franchise - is at the end of a the day; kid friendly. Stardew Valley, while may look happy go lucky and cute touches upon some really heavy topics.

We are basically skirting the lines here and there with the themes and even trying to make it in character for the Pokémon characters as well.

Taking a kid friendly characters and just trying to touch upon tough subjects while also trying not to seem OOC or off - is tough. So creative liberties it is.

Not everyone gets along in Stardew. I tried to emphasize that in Sebastian's distaste for submas. He would hate being their neighbor. He's cranky because he can't sleep in until 10:00 AM anymore because they're already at work before it turns 6:00 in the morning. Extreme opposites with their problems.

Sebastian and Submas DO NOT get along... They may tolerate each other at the end of the story but they just do not mix well.

I also think that Sebastian would just project a lot of his personal problems onto them... He already does that with Maru. He's not the best taking out his frustrations in the right direction. Haven't finished Maru's passenger event yet (another battle event...) but submas would be decently close with her since she has an interest in Pokemon and Sebastian would take that as "siding" against him. They are also decently aquainted with Demetrius which isn't the best for Sebastian's dad issues. He's not fond of the invasive species they brought in but they do appreciate infodumping to each other about mechanics and such.

Oh, Demetrius... I'm going to have fun with world building info-dumps with him. Ya'll like world building? Well, talk to the villagers, they may have a glimpse into things.

I do headcanon Demetrius (pretty much painfully canon...), Maru, and Sebastian as autistic themselves just like the Nimbasa trio. Unfortunately, that does not necessarily mean that they'll always have solidarity. For one, Sebastian's sensitivity to loud noises puts him at odds with Ingo. Submas fare better with the more infodumpy types.

Sibling relations are a sore subject for all of them so submas are horrified at even the thought of splitting tracks and hating each other because they have codependency issues; Sebastian has an inferiority complex and hates how they make him feel like even more of a failure because he doesn't like Maru. Neither parties are exactly healthy, but you can pick between who you're going for! (I was curious as to what the deal was with Sebastian so he was the first bachelor I married... I think you can tell that I divorced him.)

Sebastian has his issues... He was also going to be my first bachelor but uhh, I went with Harvey. I still love Sebastian as a character tho, he is really complex especially family dynamic wise. I do feel bad for him....

He does. I do appreciate how messy his family dynamic is, but I'm a little biased against him since I appreciate Maru and Demetrius more (sorry). I really like how he doesn't handle his issues healthily (I mean... look at Emmet.) and it's interesting to compare him to the other characters.

Like Sam! Sam's a good kid (college age 20 something year old...) and actually really emotionally mature even if he's a bit childish at times. Abigail... isn't quite all there yet but she has a strong sense of what's right and wrong. She's less hesitant than Sam when it comes to things, but Sam serves a bit as damage control here. I headcanon Sam and Abigail to have ADHD so they kind of have an idea about submas being autistic and what that entails, but it's not at the forefront of their mind. It doesn't help that their autism manifests in verrrrry different ways and they don't really know them all that well in the first place. It's a bit awkward between them but they're okay with each other.

We had a bit of fun determining the heart point changes between each route. Personally, I think friendship decreases are hilarious. Also if you don't back up anyone in this situation then... 🤨

(1) Sebastian -

Ingo -100 | Emmet -250 | Sebastian +250 | Sam -5 | Abigail -15

(2) Ingo -

Ingo +40 | Emmet +5 | Sebastian -100 | Sam -20 | Abigail -25

(3) Emmet -

Ingo +25 | Emmet +30 | Sebastian -100 | Sam -5 | Abigail -5

(4) Sam and Abigail -

Ingo +20 | Emmet +5 | Sebastian -40 | Sam +50 | Abigail +50

(5) Nobody -

Ingo -50 | Emmet -200 | Sebastian -200 | Sam -50 | Abigail -50

I don't see friendship decreases as characters getting angry at you per se. It can always just be them feeling awkward and wanting to distance themselves from you for a bit. For example, if you reject Ingo in his 8 heart event, you get knocked down two hearts just so you can get more friendly-but-not-too-friendly dialogue before it stagnates again at 8 hearts.

The "true ending" is Sam and Abigail's route since they're fairly neutral picks. You should stand up for them! Sebastian would agree that him lashing out was wrong, but he just doesn't want to talk to you about it. Why would he? You would just lecture him or something.

Bad ending is not siding with anybody like a coward. Sebastian's being a bit of a bully here (mainly to a grown man a whole head taller than him, but still, his friends got caught in the crossfire) and if you're wishy-washy then that's just odd of you as the town's farmer and supposed protagonist that goes out of their way to befriend everyone. Not a good look.

Sebastian's route is a bit of a jab at how his romance plays out. A few people have mentioned Emmet and Sebastian being friends with each other under the reasoning that they're lonely autists (but mostly just being favorites, which I get) buuuut... Not sure why you would go for Sebastian when submas is right there. Pick one or the other. They're enemies here. I can't quite see them getting along past that surface-level analysis. Smoking alone is a hard No. from Emmet since birds are super sensitive to airborne toxins (so much so, you can't even have non-stick pans around them!) and he's protective over his defeatist of an Archeops.

Ingo's route is more for fun than anything. If you really want Ingo, you do get the most points with him for mentioning him, but he's confused as to why you're trying to win him over now of all times. He's concerned about Emmet first and foremost!

Emmet has trust issues so even the slightest red flag puts a quite a bit of distance between you. He has low point increases because it's hard to win his trust. In this situation, a point increase mostly just means you didn't do anything wrong. If you side with him, that's what you're supposed to do since he's the side against Sebastian. He may be getting picked on, but he's a bit of an instigator himself. His own route aside, Ingo would be most pleased to see you speak up for his brother. Ingo's route is only has the highest point increases for him because it's well, his.

As for the bar fight... It was a bit difficult to figure out how to make it play out believably and interestingly despite it being three New Yorkers against some grocery store owner. Ingo is more focused on defense, de-escalation, and protecting his passengers (in this case, the college kids). He can take a hit and doesn't want to resort to making any attacks unless absolutely necessary, so he was blocking for the most part. Had Ingo not been the designated grocery shopper, Pierre and Emmet probably would have already killed each other. Emmet doesn't have the patience to deal with Pierre. He thinks Reshiram will smite him for upcharging them and will take it upon himself to deliver the justice of truth. Emmet's swinging at Pierre. Unfortunately, he doesn't have the best defense nor balance when he's kicking and punching. Pierre's too drunk to talk about it, but even sober he suspects that submas are working with Joja because as far as he knows, he saw Morris walk away from the Railroad when they first arrived.

Ah yes. Joja stuff. *Realigns stacks of papers* Lets touch upon Joja here for a moment and Pierre's view of things. When Submas first came around. Pierre was already suspicious of them - more confused if anything - why are two major city boys who also- mind you- come from a foreign region and bring along Pokémon. Take interest in a small town? With an abandon railroad? Right off the bat he does not have a great view; he is worried about his store, his income, and family and this is stemmed all due to Joja Mart.

Now Pierre spots Morris heading towards the railroad - of course Pierre does not know what the interactions between Submas and Morris are. In his mind it's Submas making a deal to work with them or is already with them! Pierre already hates Morris as it is.

That is why he is so passive aggressive to Ingo and Emmet. Just this time around - Pierre is drunk... and Abigail's friend is being "annoyed" by them.

Well... outright agressive in this event haha. I don't quite remember how the idea was finalized, but we decided that they would get into a barfight when doing another "showing passenger relations at the Saloon" event.

As for Joja itself. I most definitely headcannon them in this whole crossover universe as the typical "bad guy" Pokémon team. However they have already won/succeeded (Pokémon are no longer in The Ferngill Republic....) However things are now being shaken up and changing.

I could go on and on about Joja and how I view them... but I think that will be a separate post (if people want to know)

The fight was a pain to debug. For one, Pierre kept running off into the void like a coward. Ingo's lines about staying behind the yellow line were made in the debugging phase because I got fed up with him for doing that.

Worse yet. 1.6 broke the Pokemon animations so now I have to go back into every event and redo everything (RIP green bean X-Scissor). The old method I was using no longer worked; before, I was using the addObject command. Now they show up as error signs because the sprites that were previously on the sheet called from were removed as they are not valid objects.

I ended up having to figure out the temporarySprites command to replace the "using a Pokeball" animation. There are no instances of it being used in vanilla. Nobody seemed to figure it out either, so I had to make a mini-event just to test its usage and figure it out.

I eventually did. Thanks to the help of my emotional support Emmet.

Ah yes... 1.6 has broken some events. Small things. (events are still playable) But we will definitely be revisiting some events to improve or make better. Or to just fix.

I have so much backtracking to do 😭😭😭😭😭 Oh well... I thought events were safe to work on since barely anything about them changed in 1.6... I was wrong.

The ending had quite a bit of revising for concision and tone. It was much more lighthearted in Kade's drafts, but I figured that Emmet is low on steam and probably would have gone nonverbal after everything. Too much passenger interaction for the day. He just wants to depart back to his home station.

Yeah there was a lot of dialog and exposition cut. (Hmm no wonder why it's only 13 minutes long. lol)

Only 13 minutes... Still a lot considering that most vanilla events are around the 1-3 minute mark...

Poor Emmet.. and Ingo. I won't lie, when first seeing the event I burst out laughing during the fistfight. Just somthing about Ingo suddenly collapsing due to Pierre. BUT THEY'RE OKAY - ISH.

It's a bit comical! I had fun ragdolling them. Emmet was going to be much more swingy in his attacks but I ended up not keeping it in since it just didn't look right when used as an animation frame.

We at least kept one of the rag-doll sprite as a "knock back" from Pierre. Which transitions well with his passed out sprite.

Until next time! Thank you for boarding!

[evilphrog]

Watching Wheel of Time without reading the books: Season 2, episode 1

I'm at it again! I know I never posted the season 1 finale review, and maybe I will go back and do that later. But for now, I just finished the season premiere, and I have to say, Perrin is 100% correct. The five of them are much more impressive together than apart. Which isn't to say I disliked it. They are all on the struggle bus, but that is where character development is at its peak, and where we get to see their true inner strength. Which is to say, I LOVED it. Bring on the angst!

The season opener with the round table of evil plotters was a fun and clever way to deliver some exposition without boring us. Having a little girl crawling under the table, disturbing the Very Important Shadowy Cloak Meeting really humanized every single one of them, and seeing the Fake Dark One be so gentle and patient with her gives some insight into how people can become dark friends. They are just concerned parents. I am now calling him Nancy Reagan, since he is their leader. I also definitely want to pet a trolloc. They look much cuter when they aren’t being ordered to kill everyone in sight. Are they tamable? Or...redeemable? I am still not sure of their level of free will/sentience, so I am not sure which word applies.

The first scene post-credits is Moiraine working hard to take her Very Sad Alone Time Depression Bath. Just one woman, chilling in a hot tub, cuz the water gets cold without magic. It was a very good idea to show the first hot tub scene in the recaps, so I could get the full emotional subtext here. Bathing is a communal activity in this culture, but she can’t handle having someone else see her in such a vulnerable position when she already feels so vulnerable all the time. But the longer she spends isolated, the more alone and vulnerable she will continue to feel.

She and Lan are hiding out with their friends, Sassy Twin, Serious Twin, and Tom. Tom is married to one of them, but I forget which one. Without the warder bond, Lan must have lost the rapid healing that allows him to withstand his severe clothing allergy. Good thing the Sassy Twin is there to helpfully point out additional clothes that might be hurting him, and to reassure him it would be fine to remove them in her home. She truly speaks for all of us. I’m glad Lan has these three friends around to support him as he supports Moiraine. This poor man is having to learn, at the tender age of forty-something, to use his words to describe how he feels. He is afraid for his best friend, he is hurt about being pushed away at a time when he would expect to be leaned on even harder, I am pretty sure he blames her for blocked bond because she had put the block up prior to being shielded, and he feels like he is losing his only purpose in life.

And in the face of all that, he has to exhibit so much patience as Moiraine acts like every insecure teenager ever and tries to push him away. His previous experience with teenagers taught him what this behavior is like, but not how to handle it. Her “I am so aloof and do not care at all about the feelings of others” routine was incredibly transparent to everyone except Lan. He really needed his friends to lovingly slap him in the ego and remind him that the only way to truly help her is to let himself be the vulnerable one, so she can see how it' it's done, and realize it's something she can live with.

But now he has to do it the old fashioned way, by walking upstairs to check on her. Good timing, too. Slightly worse timing for Serious Twin, but at least she could handle all the Eyeless. Hopefully one of the twins does healing.

Meanwhile, at Aes Sedai High, Nynaeve and Egwene are in novice training. Egwene is dealing with a bit of culture shock. She accidentally witnesses an actual, honest to Light, bisexual orgy on screen. She is going from being a big fish in a small pond to being a big fish in an ocean surrounded by other big fish, but she is handling it better than I expected. Nynaeve is handling the entire thing exactly as I hoped she would. While Egwene focuses on adding extra challenges by learning to weave with both hands tied behind her back, Nynaeve is semi-consciously stopping herself from doing any magic at all. Polly tries playing on her pride, by saying she is just scared, and Nynaeve responds by drinking dirty dishwater while making direct eye contact. Such a power move, there. Unfortunately, it leads directly to an unwanted face-to-face discussion with JK Rowling, which quickly turns into a surprise duel. I thought JK was torturing Nynaeve by hurting her, but my husband said she was only making the air too thick for Nynaeve to move through. And really, nothing could possibly torture Nynaeve more than placing an unwanted restriction on her. She did end up shielding her, temporarily, and that was described as one of the most brutal forms of assault. Pretty sick, but also pretty consistent with boarding school hazing rituals.

Later, Nynaeve and Egwene read the letter from Perrin, where he hopes they will all stick together. And JK Rowling goes down to her secret Man Dungeon For Men to read a heavily edited version of the letter to her prisoner, New Mat. And, to this I have to say, come on JK Rowling! Why do you go and pull a stunt that the actual JK Rowling also used in her own book? Your name is getting more and more accurate as time goes on, and that is not a compliment. Anyways, Mat responds in pretty much the same way Harry Potter did, by trying to break out of jail. I’m not sure how I feel about New Mat so far. He seems a bit like a soggy bed sheet, but he is also in the exact circumstances that would lead to soggy bed sheet behavior. His puckish attitude was mostly a mask he put on to lift the spirits of those around him, and his private moments were entirely spent dwelling on his own misery. Presumably the only person he has interacted with for months now is someone who actively feeds on that misery. JK Rowling is a cursed dagger unto herself.

We get a brief glimpse of Rand, with his new haircut. He is sad and has no lines. I assume he will be more present in future episodes. He lights a lantern, presumably for his mother, but maybe for the innocent version of himself that will never exist again. Maybe for his friends he thinks he can never see again. They light the lanterns for those they lost, which might not necessarily mean the ones who died.

Perrin, meanwhile, is on a quest to find Padan Fain and steal back the magic horn. He has found another Wolf guy, who seems to be teaching him how his wolf powers work. Apparently he can see the past? Maybe he is smelling the places where things used to be, like Angua does in Discworld? So then, is he a werewolf? This is a very confusing power that has still not been explained at all. I would have liked to see Perrin get a training sequence similar to Egwene and Nynaeve, but the defining trait of wolf guys is that they aren’t a chatty bunch. They find a bunch of bodies of the traitors from the final battle, presumably disposed of once they were no longer useful. The group holds a proper funeral for them, which confuses Perrin. He doesn’t understand how they can go to such effort for the people responsible for the deaths of hundreds. The prince guy responds that if his people spent their time seeking revenge on those who betray them, they wouldn't have time for anything else. It is more helpful to the ones left behind to let it go and focus on the mission. Sort of the way of the leaf, but with a more productive twist. Perrin is really on a quest for a moral philosophy that he can live with, and this one seems slightly more compatible with him.

At Bel Tine, he lights a lantern for his wife. The first time he has to do so. He places his wedding ring on the lantern, but takes it back at the last second. He isn’t ready to let go of his own guilt just yet, but at least he can move forward while carrying it now. Loial seems good for him. And Perrin is good for Loial. He’s way more likeable now that he has gotten used to the wonder of living in the human world, and stopped condescendingly and incorrectly explaining how it all works. They are both figuring that out together. I am not sure how he survived being stabbed with the cursed dagger. By all rights it makes no sense. So I guess… Loial returned somehow. And we are also moving on from it and focusing on the mission, even if we carry our confusion with us.

Other episode reviews

[shewhohangsoutincemeteries]

to ashes, conflicted

Clint Barton x F!Reader

To Ashes, Chapter Thirty-Two

Chapter Summary: your patience runs thin with clint and your latest mission comes with complications.

Warnings: angst, canon-typical violence

Word Count: 2,010

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CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

Days Since the Decimation: Three Years, Sixty-Three Days

“Hungry?” you asked without looking up from the fridge. You pulled a plastic bag of leftover takeout off the shelf, fishing out a plastic container of curry. When Clint didn’t reply, or even acknowledge you at all, you dropped it onto the kitchen counter with more force than was strictly necessary. The lid wasn’t completely in place, and sauce splattered the countertop. You cursed to yourself, irritated further. You spoke under your breath, reaching for a towel. “Or I could just go fuck myself, I guess.”

It was catty, you supposed, but Clint had been oscillating between his usual self and frustratingly cold and dismissive over the last two months, and it was driving you insane. One day he’d be fine – for Clint, anyway – and the next, you’d be on the business end of the silent treatment. The normal days had gotten fewer and far between since the anniversary, and what triggered the silence, you still had no idea, but it was very quickly beginning to grind on the very last of your nerves.

Tossing the container into the microwave, you hit a couple of buttons and leaned against the countertop as the turntable began to rotate. You let yourself stew as it warmed, arm folding across your chest as you watched the archer head for the shower. He continued to avoid eye contact as though you weren’t there at all, even as the microwave beeped to announce its completion.

You sighed irritably and leaned your elbows on the counter as you picked petulantly at the curry. When Clint finally reemerged, he was dressed in most of his mission gear, and you tossed your fork in the sink. He didn’t even glance up as it clattered against the metal.

“You ready?” he asked gruffly from the couch, tugging on one of his boots.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Are you talking to me?” It slipped out before you could stop it, annoyance dripping from every word.

Clint looked up; an eyebrow raised. “What’s the matter with you?”

You probably should have just shut up, should have just gotten changed and followed him out the door. But instead, you wiped your hands on a tea towel and tossed it on the counter in front of you. The words kept spewing out bitterly. “I just didn’t realize today was one of the days you actually speak to me like I’m a human being.”

“…What are you talking about?”

Shut up, Y/N.

“What am I—” you scoffed, shaking your head as you rounded the counter towards him. “Clint, this is the first time you’ve spoken to me in three days, and its to ask if I’m ready to go on a mission we haven’t even talked about.”

“We—”

“No, we haven’t!” you snapped, brandishing a finger at him as you closed the distance between you. “Honestly, most days you treat me like I’m furniture around here and I am fucking sick of it! You disappear for months; you come back and tell me you ‘need me’ and, fine, I roll with that, but then you act like I’m not even here—”

Clint’s tone turned a shade of defensive, his jaw tightening and releasing. “I’m not—”

You stabbed him in the chest with your finger. “You act like I’m not even here, and you know what, that would be fine too, except when you finally do talk to me, I actually believe for a moment that things could be going back to normal between the two of us.”

“Everything is—”

“No, it’s not!” you shouted, your face inches from his. “Clint, I get emotional whiplash every time you decide to talk to me!”

“Would you just let me—”

“And I sit here and I pretend everything is fine, and meanwhile you’re pretending I don’t exist and you’ve got me yelling like some kind of sitcom reject and if you could just man up and stop being such a—”

Your words caught in your throat as Clint’s hand suddenly closed around it. He pushed you back against the wall, his thumb pressed hard against the corner of your jaw. In your anger you hadn’t realized just how close you’d been to him, and now even that limited space was gone, Clint’s body so close that you could feel his chest brush against yours with each of his breaths.

His fingers were tight, unforgiving, against your throat. And still you felt a thrill shoot through you, and your lips parted without breath. Clint’s eyes were dark. Anger and something else that sent a shiver straight to the small of your back burned in his gaze.

Your fists clenched and unclenched by your sides; a shield could force him away from you, release you, and maybe you should have been scared of this side of Clint, but his eyes fell for a moment to your parted lips and you couldn’t move.

Do it.

Clint released you, stepping away as though he’d suddenly woken up. He cleared his throat and you inhaled, still leaning back against the wall. Your breath shook as you caught it, your palms pressed against the wall by your thighs. Clint ran a hand through his hair, turning his back to you, and you exhaled as that tightness that had bloomed in the pit of your belly began to ease.

“Get changed,” he said finally, and you swore his voice was unsteady. “We’ve… we’ve got a window closing. We’ll talk about this later.”

***

The ‘window’ had turned out to be a weapons deal in the middle of Holland Park – even three years after the Snap and with society beginning to rebuild its law enforcement within the populated areas, criminals seemed to have no problem with committing grand scale felonies in what were still considered major landmarks. Still, the park was very much deserted at this hour, and you found yourself using the silence around you to continue stewing over your… conversation with Clint as you made your way towards the Kyoto Gardens fountain.

You should have just ignored your feelings and followed after him obediently as usual. The helpful little sidekick just doing what she’s told. But no, you had to go postal on him, and now…

You sighed as you clambered up to the top of the fountain’s rock formation, carefully avoiding the water running between the stones. The foliage would mostly block you from view, and the darkness would do the rest. Clint would be nearby, waiting for his opportunity to strike.

Clint…

God, he was going to withdraw even more, wasn’t he? He was going to pretend everything was fine for a few days and then get even more monosyllabic. He might even disappear again.

You’d made a big show of telling him you didn’t care about him sleeping with you and taking off – you didn’t – and then you’d gone and acted like a frickin’ insane girlfriend.

Settling in a crouch on the outcrop, you continued to mull petulantly as you waited for the targets to show. It was almost an hour before anyone turned up, and an ache was starting to settle into both your head and your thighs. A furrow appeared between your brows as the man approaching the fountain arrived empty handed. You recognized his face – he was supposed to be doing the dealing here.

You reached up activate the comms device in your ear. “Hey, something’s off here, I—”

Your head jerked automatically as you heard a pebble skitter down the stones behind you. Hand flying automatically to your belt and you barely managed to roll out of the way as a baseball bat suddenly swung down toward you. Without your skull to stop it, it cracked against the stone you’d just been kneeling on.

Landing on your back on the uneven stones left you in just as bad a position and with a sharp pain in your shoulder, but going any further would have had you rolling right off the edge of the outcrop. The limited light now worked against you, and you stopped fumbling for your gun as the bat came arching down out of the darkness again.

You rocked back onto your shoulders and kicked upward with both feet. The grunt of your assailant told you you’d caught him in the stomach, and you scrambled back into a crouch long enough to pull the blade from the holster on your boot. The sound of voices below and the agonized cry of someone meeting Clint’s blade suggested the man on the ground’s back up had arrived at the same time as your attackers.

Straightening, you held the blade tightly in your fist. The metal shone as it briefly caught the light of the nearest lamppost.

“I told you the boss was on to something.” a gruff, eastern European voice said in the dark, and you raised the blade warningly. “There’s more than one Ronin.”

Oh, shit.

“Yeah, yeah.” came the cockney reply, the man still winded from his meeting with your boots. “Ronin’s got himself a girlfriend. Just get on with it.”

Oh, SHIT.

You swung wide with the knife as the first man approached, ducking under a swing from another baseball bat. The European caught you in the shoulder and you grunted, the blow hard enough that you dropped the knife. You heard it clatter against the rocks below. The cockney guy shoved past him and swung, and you dodged to the left, the move sloppy on uneven ground.

The urge to force them away with a shield was growing along with your nerves as they forced you back closer to the edge of the outcropping, and you swallowed it back. They were already far too informed, and you couldn’t risk them actually unpuzzling your identities. The cockney man rushed you, sensing your hesitation, and you dropped just as quickly. You used his momentum to throw him over your shoulder and send him crashing into the water below.

“Hülye kurva!” the European spat, and you stood quickly, slugging him in the jaw. He grunted, spat, and swung the bat again. You cursed as you moved too slow and the bat glanced off your side. Your fingers twitched in an automatic gesture; forcing the bat out of his hands would be so easy, but—

You jumped, grabbing hold of a tree branch above you. You swung forward, both feet meeting his chest. He fell and you landed in front of him, kicking the bat out of his hand. Removing your gun from its holster, you leveled it with his stomach, finger curling around the trigger.

And then your body suddenly seized as an excruciating pain exploded between your shoulders and set your whole body on fire. Fifty thousand volts coursed through you from the taser bolt in your back and you felt your limbs tense uncontrollably. Your eyes rolled back and you collapsed backward, off of the ledge. A sick, rushing sensation overcame you before you felt your back hit the water and the back of your head cracked against stone.

Then everything went black.

***

“Come on, Y/N. Come on, baby, breathe…”

An almost painful pressure on your chest forced you back into consciousness, the same feeling repeating four more times before you finally coughed the water from your lungs. You rolled onto your side and threw the rest of it up, your chest heaving and your hair dripping in your eyes as you tried to force them open again.

You’d been dragged from the water, a pool of it spreading from your clothes onto the stone beneath you. Your throat burned as you tried to gulp down air, and you coughed again. “Wh—?”

You felt yourself pulled upward, arms banding around your shoulders. Clint’s hand curled in your damp, tangled hair, your face tucked against the curve of his neck. “You gotta stop scaring me like this, Y/N.”

You coughed a laugh, wrapping an arm around his neck as tears burned your eyes. “I’m working on it.”

.

.

.

tags:@trekkingaroundasgard@lovely-dreamer19@wittyforachange@wefracturedmotivation@january-echoes@glossyloner@capitalnineteen@youclickedthislink@s0ftness@castieltrash1@drakelover78@queenoftheunderdark@lol-you-thought@akumune@xxboesefrauxx@enna-core@hearmyharmony@katsies@youralphawolf72@maenji@rhymesmenagerie@gwianasky@melaclintbartoncorner@loki-is-loved@whovianayesha@bradfordbantams@alice-the-nerd@fanofallthefics@ace-fandom-dumbass@kaelyn-lobrutto24@twsssmlmaa@earth-pig-fish@meeksmusic83@hallothankmas@justanothermagicalsara@janineb86@darsynia@rhymesmenagerie @thatwelshbi @lauraashley93

AN: this chapter was short and took far too long to write, but I promise the next one will come much quicker!

AN2: The language we're seeing here is Hungarian - and that's because I'm going to be using a particular fictional Marvel country in a few chapters and it's canonically right next to Hungary, so I figured there would/could be an overlap in the language. No spoilers though!

[star-rie]

when your servant is a little shite

-----------------------

Then Merlin looks at Gaius, who’s sitting there, eyeing him as if he knows what Merlin is going to do.

‘Merlin, no’

‘Merlin yes’

or

Merlin tests the limits of Arthur’s patience.

-----------------------

alternatively, ao3 link

original prompt

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4 (you're here), PART 5, PART 6

-----------------------

Arthur is waiting for a trial.

Earlier that day, a woman had come crying at the castle gate. Begging an audience with the king. She brought her son’s corpse, blaming it on her neighbor.

He cried innocence when the guards dragged him from his home into Camelot’s cell. And so here they are, in the throne room, airtight, waiting for their trial.

Merlin knows the truth; of course he does; he did his own investigation behind Arthur’s back. He sort of had a plan for how this trial would play out, and he hoped he could execute it.

“What’s taking them so long?” Arthur asks from his throne, and Merlin shrugs.

Arthur sighs, staring intently at the door. Five minutes later, they hadn't arrived yet. “Did we get the time right?”

“Yes, twelve on the dot sire, they’re late." Merlin said

It’s not an unusual occurrence; there was that one time they had to cancel a trial because the witness didn’t show up. They were later found dead in the forest.

Arthur stands and says, “I’m going to look for them.”

Merlin immediately stops him, sitting him down on his throne. “My Lord, you must remember, patience is key.”

“What use does the key have if the problem isn’t here yet?”

Right, that was a bad analogy. But Arthur can’t go outside because, well, let’s just say Merlin prepared something that he didn’t want Arthur to see. Merlin starts to think of ways to keep Arthur in place.

They’ll come eventually, Merlin is confident. But for how long, he’s not sure.

Merlin looks at the door, still tightly shut. Hm. And then he looks at Arthur and the empty throne beside him.

Oh.

Well, Merlin had been wanting to test this theory for a while, but he couldn’t do so without looking absolutely disrespectful and rude. And truthfully, he still feels embarrassed about the stunt he pulled at the second annual economics conference.

But seeing Sir Lunard and his friend’s faces after the conference brings him joys he cannot describe. They’re here too, in the corner of the room, probably gossiping about Merlin again. I can’t blame them.

Merlin looks at the empty throne again. Mulling over his choices. Well, this might be rude and disrespectful, but at least it kept Arthur sitting.

So Merlin pats Arthur’s shoulder, giving him what hopefully is a reassuring smile before he goes to sit on the Queen’s chair. If the court wasn’t looking at them, they’re staring now.

Merlin could already feel another round of lecturing tonight from the old man across the room.

“Merlin, what are you doing?” Arthur asks for the third time that week.

“I am sitting, sir, because my legs are tired." that was the same excuse as last time. “And I want to see if what you said about the chair being as hard as ‘Gwen's flooring back when I disguised myself as a peasant’ is true.”

Arthur's face gapes like a fish, trying to make sense of what’s happening, but before he could argue, the group came in, the mother and a man, accompanied by a set of guards.

The mother was hysterical, and the man was pale. Meanwhile, the guards are silently questioning Merlin’s position on the queen's throne. It would have been funny if not for the dead baby on the floor.

“My son, my poor son,” she cried loudly, sniffing into her cloth.

“I didn’t do it!” The man cried and did not question why there are two men sitting on the throne when there’s supposed to be one king.

“Now let’s just be calm." Arthur was caught off guard by the mother’s wail, holding her son’s body close to her chest.

“This rascal snuck into my house to steal my gold, and he killed my son! How could you do this? He’s only a baby!”

“I didn’t do it! I swear it's my mother’s name!” he begs, kneeling on the floor. “You have to believe me, your majesty, this woman is framing me!”

“How could you say such cruel things? The proof is there!”

“It’s not proof! It’s all lies!!” He said, gripping his hair so hard it might fall off his scalp. "Please, your majesty!”

“My son, your highness! My son is dead!”

“She’s lying, your highness!”

“Don’t believe anything that came out of this thief’s mouth.“

"Stop,” Arthur said, silencing them. Arthur massages his temple, thinking for a while, before he turns to look at Merlin. “What do you think?”

Merlin, having already figured everything out, said to him, "Well, for starters, Gaius, do you mind analyzing the cause of death?”

“Isn’t it clear? He gutted his throat! It’s all there to see!” she said

“It’s true, sir." Elyan said, presenting a bloody hatchet. “This was found at the man’s home.”

The court whispers loudly at this new revelation. Merlin leans on his hand. “Then I assumed you would have no problem if the court physician were to check his body.”

“Search all you want, you won’t find anything,” she laughs. Merlin nods at her, and Gaius goes to check on the baby. It took a few minutes before Gaius widened his eyes, obviously faking his surprise. “Why, he’s been poisoned.”

The mother stiffens. The court gasped, whispering loudly, “What type of Gaius?” Merlin asks him

“From the symptoms, I think it might be hemlock.”

“Interesting, thank you, Gaius.”

Gaius stands, and then starts to stare at him. 'Merlin, why are you sitting on the Queen’s throne? This is ridiculous even for you; get off there right now!’

Merlin nods, dismissing him, ‘No.

Gaius sighs, nodding before going back to the audience.

Merlin continues to address the court. “That’s an interesting revelation, but that certainly doesn’t prove anything. Sir Elyan, did you find any sort of potion while you were searching the thief’s house?”

"No, we did not,” he answers, connecting the pieces.

“I see. Now, may you please call Sir Leon and Lady Guinevere for me. They’re waiting outside.” Elyan nods, going outside to fetch them. Arthur immediately turns to him in disbelief, and Merlin shrugs, smiling.

Leon and Gwen both came in with a woman. Befuddled at Merlin’s position, but their faces turned grim once they saw the baby on the floor.

“We were called?” Leon asked

"Yes, Sir Leon, may you please introduce this woman to the court?” Merlin gestures to the woman beside him.

Leon nods. “Ladies and gentlemen, this is the shopkeeper at the edge of town; she has something she wants to say,” Leon said, giving an encouraging nod to her.

She sighs, uncertain, looking at Merlin before she eventually says, “It was two nights ago... I usually don’t sell potions, but I encounter them on my journey. So as a shopkeeper, I keep it at the edge of my shelf. No one bought it for months, until... She looks at the mother and sighs.

“I shouldn’t have kept it; I shouldn’t even have sold it, but I did remember this woman coming to my shop late at night, as for the man, I never saw him in my life.”

“You liar!” She screams, launching at her, and the guards hold her down.

Merlin, completely dismissing her, continues to ask her, “And did she buy the potion?”

She was silent, looking at the woman in front of her, and then at the dead child, before eventually saying, "Yes,”

“Does the bottle that you sell have some sort of writing on it?” Merlin continues

“I remember it saying ‘hemlock’” She said she was unsure. The court is wild, whispers turn into full-on conversations.

“But I’m not sure; I could be wrong,“ she says as Arthur raises his hand to silence the court.

“No, it’s alright, miss; that's very useful information. Thank you; that’s very brave of you,” Merlin said, approving her.

“Now, I want everyone to take a look at this. Lady Guinevere, would you mind telling the court what you’re holding?”

She stepped forward, holding a clothed object. “I found this at her home. Everyone is so focused on the man’s house, so I searched at the mother’s house instead. I thought that we could find some new insights and this is what I found.” She said, showing an empty bottle with the word ‘hemlock’ written on it.

The mother has gone pale. “But—“

“I rest my case your honor” he said to Arthur, gesturing for the guards to hold her down, stopping her from attacking them

Then, Merlin turns to Arthur, who’s staring at him, too stunned to do anything. “What Merlin?”

“The verdict”

“Oh yes! The verdict!” Arthur said, standing in front of them. Merlin followed immediately.

“By the court of Camelot, you are found guilty of murder; does anyone have any objections?”

Everyone stayed silent, shaking their heads.

“I object! The king framed me!” She says this, pointing at Merlin.

"Um, no, I’m the King. He’s my…” He looks at Merlin. "He's, uh, he's—according to the laws of Camelot, you are sentenced to death.”

“WHAT?” She yelled at him as the guards dragged her away, cursing King Arthur’s and his lineage to come.

“Thank you, thank you so much, King Arthur. I am forever indebted to you!” The man thanked him, bowing at Merlin.

"Wait, no, no, I’m not—“

“I shall train and join your knight's sire! I realize now that it is my duty to protect you! Please wait for me, my king!" He said, grasping Merlin’s hand before bowing at Arthur. “Sir!”

But before they could say anything, he had already run off, probably to share his wonderful tale of King Arthur.

"He's never seen you before, hasn’t he?”

"No,” Arthur said, pursing his lips and staring into him. And it was at this moment that Merlin just remembered that he had been sitting on the queen’s throne for an indefinite amount of time, probably just insulting Arthur’s mom, his future wife, and his whole ancestry.

Merlin waited nervously before Arthur said, “Thank you, Merlin,” and walked off to brief the guards, like nothing had happened.

It seems like the court appreciation for Merlin has gone up, they no longer scowl when they meet him.

The next time they hold a trial, Arthur insists that he sits at the Queen’s throne.

“You’re the jury at this point; I might as well give you a special seat,” he said when Merlin told him the whole notion was ridiculous.