#me: I'd love Ed to meet the party!

[adickaboutspoons]

Mostly I was responding to the points raised in @scarrletmoon's response, but you raise some excellent points to which I'd like to respond. Feel free to ignore if you're tired of my bullshit. I completely understand the impulse. 1st, you're absolutely right; I was coming across as gate-keepery by saying that I find Stede's eccentricities charming as though that ought be the default experience. For that I apologize. I ought to have taken more care. When I said "And that's valid, but I would say that those are the parts that the crew and Ed grow to love once they embrace those parts of him instead of cringing at them" what I meant to convey is that the experience of 2nd-hand embarrassment when Stede does something that recalls to the viewer times when they have felt ashamed/were made to feel shame because of something they did is absolutely understandable, but we can take heart in Stede being accepted & loved for those parts of him, & find hope that so too may we be embraced for our own quirks & foibles. My intention was to encourage others to be more gentle with & accepting of their own perceived failings, but I can see now that I failed to adequately express that, & for that I am sorry. I do take issue with the suggestion that I am strawmanning, though; I would argue that how one views Stede's motivation & framing absolutely informs the extent to which/moments in which one finds his behavior cringe-worthy. In your original post, you contend Stede is "pretending to be this macho pirate captain who totally knows what he's doing" & your response above adds he's a bad manager & a jerk because he's praising himself & chiding his employees, whom you interpret as him treating as stand-ins for his own children. If that's how you're framing the scenario, then, sure - I can see how his behavior comes across as cringe to you. But that's not at all how I perceived it. I will grant he is pretending more expertise than he actually possesses, but he IS a pirate captain, & as to the attribution of "macho" I absolutely disagree, specifically because he is textually interested in a form of piracy that is not that. Because that is my understanding of the scene, in the debrief scene I see a person excited at the success of what, if Black Pete is to be believed, is their very 1st raid, & doesn't understand why everyone else wasn't also chuffed. He then listens to Wee John' criticism & encourages him to clarify WHY he feels the way he does. When Wee John identifies the lack of a flag as a contributing factor to his disgruntlement, Stede provides materials so they can rectify the deficit. This isn't Stede forcing arts & crafts on these grown-ass men (& Jim) - it's Stede hearing a problem & supplying the means to a solution. Similarly, he hears out Buttons about the crew's dissatisfaction, & tries to rectify it by finding a more appealing target for a raid, even though he obviously feels unequal to the task himself. To me, that's the complete opposite of a bad manager (to me he's a bad manager when he's being dismissive of the crew's input, like the fuckery brainstorming, & even then he climbs down from his high horse & apologizes. Which? GREAT manager!). Where you see Stede infantilizing his crew, I see them taking part in activities that, while generally relegated to childhood, aren't implicitly childish, & of their own volition, & Stede sowing the seeds that will eventually blossom into a found family (not imposing an established family structure). For clarity, I'm not saying my interpretation is objectively right, nor that yours is wrong. I'm just saying framing is going to influence perception of whether Stede's behavior is Cringe, & that's kind of what I was getting at with my myriad examples of Stede behaving "authentically" or "inauthentically" & when that is a viable predictor of a general fandom perception of when Stede is being Cringe. Because I really don't think it is. This is going to continue in the notes because tumlr thinks they can cut my mic.

listen I love stede a lot - I think he's the bravest character in the show. he changes everyone he meets for the better. he embodies what I think of as the thesis of the show. if he wasn't the way that he is, the show would not be very good, imo.

but in ep one he gives his pirate crew notes on the raid they just did as though they were a community theater troupe and his notes were 1) complimenting his own opening speech as "very inspiring" and 2) complaining that that the crew wasn't sufficiently enthusiastic about robbing two poor fisherman of a single plant.

during the raid his narration went "some men are born to be pirate captains, others learn on the job. me? well I'm a pretty solid mix of both" as though he has any idea what he's doing.

and AFTER the raid Olu has to gently point out to him that piracy isn't a game to the rest of the crew.

There's a reason that Rhys Darby was the only person capable of playing Stede without making him seem like a total dick. And I think that's bc Rhys was able to convey the idea that Stede's behavior in the first few eps is coming out of this deep sense of insecurity - he's doing some Stede-y things (flag making! paying the crew! bedtime stories!) that are great but he's also pretending to be this macho pirate captain who totally knows what he's doing. And it's the pretending that makes people cringe with second hand embarrassment. While also, often, seeing themselves in it and feeling a great deal of sympathy for Stede about it.

The reason Stede is like this is because HE thinks there's something deeply wrong with him, a belief that has been solidified by everyone around him his entire life, and therefore he needs to do everything he can to hide that deeply wrong thing about him. When he unpacks that and embraces the things about himself he originally thought were embarrassing (being weak, pathetic, soft, etc), he can stop pretending. And that's when other characters grow to love him! And so people will sometimes call him cringe because they aspire to be cringe like him, to embrace the parts of themselves that they were punished for and live more authentically.

because he changes! that's the point! he moves from cringe (pretending to be someone he's not) to cringe (being true to himself, always a deeply vulnerable thing to be) and it takes a lot of hard work. that's what makes me LIKE him as a character. that's what I think makes him the bravest character on the show. because he doesn't start out perfect. he's a puppet who grows into a real boy and that means that for a period of time he was a puppet, and that's okay.

[womanexile]

Peter

Forgive me Peter

My lost fearless leader

In closets like cedar

Preserved from when we were just kids

Is it something I did?

The goddess of timing

Something Great-“one day I’ll come into your world and get it right”

Lay Down (HS unreleased)”We were never meant to make it, This time”

I Love You- “maybe if I got my timing right, I wouldn’t end up alone”

Once found us beguiling

She said she was trying

Peter, was she lying?

My ribs get the feeling she did

And I didn’t wanna come down

I thought it was just goodbye for now

Suburban Legends-“when you told me we’d get back together”

Sigh of the Time-“we can meet again somewhere, somewhere far away from here”

Your said you were gonna grow up

Then you were gonna come find me

Said you were gonna grow up

Then you were gonna come find me

Said you were gonna grow up

Then you were gonna come find me

MMITH-“I gotta get better, I gotta get better”

Words from the mouths of babes

Promises oceans deep

Don’t Let Me Go (HS unreleased)-“I promised one day that I'd bring you back a star”

But never to keep

Oh, never to keep

I Love You-“I didn’t come back and I wasn’t there”

To Be So Lonely-“don’t blame me for falling, I was just a little boy” “Wasn’t ready for it all”

Little Freak-“I disrespected you Jumped in feet first, and I landed too hard, A broken ankle, karma rules”

Are you still a mind reader?

A natural scene stealer?

I’ve heard great things, Peter

But life was always easier on you

Than it was on me

Slut!-“I’ll pay the price, you won’t”

NTWDT-“You went to a party, I heard from everybody, You part the crowd like the Red Sea”

Willow-“life was a willow and it bent right to your wind”

And sometimes it gets me

When crossing your jet stream

We both did the best we could do

Underneath the same moon

In different galaxies

Lay Down (HS unreleased)”Two Hearts are divided, Now that we’re worlds apart

And I didn’t wanna hang around

We said it was just goodbye for now

And I won’t confess that I waited, but I let the lamp burn

This Love-“lantern burning, flickered in my mind for only you”

DBATC-“chandelier’s still flickering here”

Golden-“I’m hopeless, broken, so you wait for me in the sky”

As the men masqueraded, I hoped you’d return

With your feet on the ground, tell me all that you’d learned

‘Cause love’s never lost when perspective is earned

And you said you’s come and get me, but you were twenty-five

Harry was 25 in 2019 when they were both in attendance to Ed’s wedding and when he released Fine Line on her birthday.

Sunflower Vol. 6-“but I’ve been trying hard no to act a fool” “let me inside, I wanna get to know you”

And the shelf life of those fantasies has expired

Lost to the “Lost Boys” chapter of your life

Forgive me, Peter, please know that I tried

To hold on to the days

When you were mine

But the woman who sits by the window

Has turned out the light

Taylor also references Peter in cardigan

“Peter losing Wendy”

The cardigan mv has many parallels to Harry’s Falling mv

On the Spotify canvas for Peter it has the typewriter set at 20. 20 is a Haylor number.

[eddiestightywhities]

SNIPPET SUNDAY

so there i was minding my own business working away on my s08e08 coda when BAM! charlie @playinginthunderstorms goes and drops THIS SHOW-STOPPING FIC and completely derails my efforts by inspiring me to write a completely different fic that is also a coda for s08e08 lmao. having writer friends is never, ever boring, amirite?!

anyways here's an excerpt seeing as i thought i'd get it finished tonight but didn't and need the motivation to keep going with it asfhjhsk

ps pls be kind as it's completely unedited xp

.

“Take it off.”

Buck looks up to where Eddie is standing in the door jam, big hands on slim hips and pink lips pinched.

“Huh?” he replies.

Because huh?

Eddie gives him The Look; his patented Buck look.

“Buck,” he says in the exact same way Buck just heard it in his head.

Then Eddie's eyebrows shoot up in the way Buck knows to mean you know what I mean, and although most of the time Buck knows precisely what Eddie means with just one pointed eyebrow-raise, right now he has zero clue of whatever it is Eddie is trying to tell him.

“What?” he says, his own brows asking half the question for him.

Eddie sighs, and it's kind of pained and long-suffering, which—fair.

“The hoodie, lover-boy. Take it off.”

The penny-drop is immediate.

For some reason, Buck blushes a little under Eddie's gaze—and maybe a little at his use of the weirdly alluring moniker.

Buck is wearing one of Tommy's hoodies.

He doesn't pout, but it's a close thing.

“But it's—Eds, it's the only thing I have left of him,” he protests, voice pathetically brittle and small.

Eddie's eyes go so soft you could top hot chocolate with them and cover them in squirty cream.

“Look, Buck, keeping it is bad enough. But wearing it? That's some pretty solid self-sabotaging behaviour, man. Trust me; I should know.” His words are cleanly direct, as they always are, only his mouth treats them with such gentleness, and such care, that Buck kind of wants to cry.

Eddie always looks after him. Always works hard to keep Buck's heart safe from harm.

Buck pictures it now, his heart laying uselessly in his friend's cupped hands as it continues to pump Buck's blood out of its floppy ventricles, even though there's nowhere left for it to go.

Tommy left him.

They all leave, eventually. Because everybody leaves Buck, he should know that by now.

Everyone except Eddie.

Adversely, though, it was only yesterday that Eddie had told Buck about his absolutely batshit crazy idea of moving back to El Paso, after which Buck's brain had consequently stopped sending messages to his body to tell it how to breathe.

He remembers picturing Yesterday Eddie crushing Buck's heart in a tight fist, blood and viscera oozing out from between his fingers and dripping down over his knuckles, right onto the sparkling white kitchen tiles. Then, rounding the table and chairs to step on the pedal bin pedal, he'd proceeded to throw Buck's heart away into the trash bag along with the rest of the trash.

Somehow though, in the space between the last of Buck's now-crushed heartbeats and him blinking back to reality, Buck had managed to snap out of the fucked-up vision to remind his body to keep working in the way that it's supposed to.

He'd then forced a plastic smile onto his face and painted it with as much selfless understanding as he could muster, before coming out with, “Well, we should move this party to the couch,” and offering himself up as a Realtor Virtual Meeting Wingman like a certified insane person.

Buck loved Eddie—he was his best friend in all the world—so what the fuck was he doing helping the guy turn his life into a living hell?

But helping being his first instinct was what made him realise he loved Eddie and Christopher enough to give them up, if that's what it was going to take to facilitate them getting their happiness back.

…Or so he thought.

As much as he had tried—and by god, he had really, really tried—Buck just couldn't keep up the Supportive Best Friend charade for very long.

That's when all hell had broken loose.

.

tags are under the cut, play or nay:

@inell @rosieposiepuddingnpie @sortasirius @angela-feelstoomuch @woodchoc-magnum @kitteneddiediaz @buddiebeginz @watchyourbuck @treasurehuntbuck @daffi-990 @colonoscopys @shitouttabuck @lamardeuse @idealuk @veronae-buddie @isaacthedruid @team-118 @wildehacked @playinginthunderstorms @kyoteugly @hotshotsxyz

[foxes-that-run]

The 1

The 1 is talking to an ex and updating them on her life, we got to see it reenacted at the 2021 Grammys when Folklore won AOTY:

The 1 was written between March and July 2020. It had not been long since Harry and Taylor saw each other, we know of at least at Ed Sheeran's Wedding in September. Lover and Fine Line (on Taylors 30th Birthday) came out since then, 2019 had been a big year.

In the long pond sessions Taylor and Aaron talked about how it reflects the whole album. Which is interesting when Taylor also sang in Gold Rush that her mind turns Harry's life “into folklore”.

I see The 1, Cardigan and Exile as one conversation (I'll get to Betty). From pleasantries, expressing support and then rehashing their end.

Lyrics

[Verse 1] I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit Been saying "yes" instead of "no" I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though I hit the ground running each night I hit the Sunday matinée You know the greatest films of all time were never made

In the long pond sessions Taylor said the opening line has a double meaning, that the sound of folklore was a new direction and that she was being open to new experiences personally.

Taylor has a similar line to the bus stop, in Cardigan, which is almost a continuation of The 1, “I knew I'd curse you for the longest time / Chasin' shadows in the grocery line” both capture that feeling of subconsciously looking for someone

Taylor says she’s busy, hits the ground running and fits as much as she can in. Ironic lines in a pandemic. The matinee line sounds like she made time to see Dunkirk, but maybe that's just me.

“The greatest films of all time were never made.” I love this line, she’s reflecting that their relationship was cut short. She also refers to it as a film later in the conversation in Exile. The wildest dreams music video also refers to them as Taylor and Burton

[Pre-Chorus] I guess you never know, never know And if you wanted me, you really should've showed And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow And it's alright now

In the pre-chorus Taylor reflects on the different views of their relationship in 1989 compared to HS1. They have both said they don’t communicate in person what they can in song.

'If you never bleed your never gonna grow' there is a similar line in Woman on HS1: "he’s right where I should, where I should be but you’re making me bleed”. The reference here is that Harry should have shared his feelings sooner, or then but didn't.

However, in Cruel Summer however, Taylor said "And if I bleed, you'll be the last to know, oh" so it seems mutual to hide their feelings.

In Olivia, Harry said “This isn't the stain of a red wine, I'm bleeding love”

It's alright is a reference to Fine Line's "We'll be a fine line / We'll be alright"

[Chorus] But we were something, don't you think so? Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool And if my wishes came true It would've been you In my defense, I have none For never leaving well enough alone But it would've been fun If you would've been the one (Ooh)

I love “roaring 20’s” like, it refers to both her age and “it was so Gatsby that year” from TIWWCHNT, referring the party 1989 era before the gates shut in Reputation. 20 is a Haylor theme also

Also tossing pennies and wishes reminds you of I wish you would.

ME! Also includes “I can never leave well enough alone”

Taylor has described their relationship as 'like the mall before the internet' in Coney Island, an incredibly fun place.

[Verse 2] I have this dream you're doing cool shit Having adventures on your own You meet some woman on the internet and take her home We never painted by the numbers, baby But we were making it count You know the greatest loves of all time are over now

I love the second verse, she is hoping that her muse is living a happy new life. To me 'adventures on your own' conjures up Harry's post One Direction career. Which it may have been with his second album freshly released.

'We never painted by the numbers' is similar to 'you painted my nights a colour I have searched for since' in Question..?

[Pre-Chorus] I guess you never know, never know And it's another day waking up alone [Bridge] I, I, I persist and resist the temptation to ask you If one thing had been different Would everything be different today?

Taylor has a few songs that explore Haylor What Ifs:

Cardigan "I knew you would haunt all of my what-if's"

INTHAF Imagines what if they had met as children, and

Suburban Legends imagines a fantasy of them surprising the whole school in a 1950's gym, as a metaphor for being a power couple at a high profile event.

Slut! “Aquamarine, moonlit swimmin' pool / What if all I need is you?”

We were something, don't you think so? Rosé flowing with your chosen family And it would've been sweet If it could've been me In my defense, I have none For digging up the grave another time But it would've been fun If you would've been the one (Ooh)

More Haylor rosé since Maroon: "Your roommate's cheap-ass screw-top rosé, that's how".

Digging up the grave also reminds us of the opening of Look at what you made me do, where Taylor emerges as a Zombie wearing a dress similar to the one she wore in Out of the Woods.

[smoshidiot]

hey guys: i ranked every smosh video

yes, every. single. smosh video. (every main channel sketch from 2005-2017 + 2023)

here it is under the cut if for some damn reason you're curious

♡ ABSOLUTE FAVES ♡ Paranormal Easy Bake Oven Sleepwalking Disaster Mortal Kombat Theme Food Battle 2006 Food Battle 2023 The Legend of Zelda Rap Axe Murderer Battleship Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Theme Boxman's Girlfriend Pokemon Theme Ian's Birthday Anthony Gets a Haircut Pokemon Theme REVENGE That Damn Neighbor Assassins Creed 3 Song My Dead Friend Boxman 2.0 Boxman Smosh Short 1: Dolls Unitarded A Very Hairy Situation w/Billy Mays Anthony is Mexican Left Handed Magic Keyboard Food Battle 2007 That Damn Yard Sale Four Years Foreplay Pokemon In Real Life Stuck in a Toilet My Mom's AMAZING Video Sex Ed Rocks Going to the Mountains Stop Copying Me! Cursed Magic 8 Ball We Rule High School Dixon Cider Smosh the Movie Real Death Note Firetruck I Broke My Foot 1 Hour Special Ghostmates Food Battle 2008 The Ultimate Shoedown WTF! I'm Old! Food Battle 2010 Dolls: 10 Years Later The Real Party Song Kiss Currency PRETTY DAMN GOOD

Smash Rap Molester Moon Hand Bomb Sleeping Pill Disaster My Grandpa's Dirty Secret Food Battle 2011 Quest for the Scooter Smosh Found Dead Garrett's Blog How Not to Act on a First Date Longest Staring Contest Ever Extreme Sleepover Hardcore Max Real Voodoo Doll He's Driving Me Crazy First Person Shooters Suck Drink Your Own Piss Parents SuckWe're Stuck Together We Finally Released Our Banned Video Boxman for President Cat Soup I Caught Every Pokemon Ian is Dangerous Ian's First Girlfriend Ian Gets Lucky Manspider Happy Cow Food Battle 2012 Pizza Zombies Food Battle 2013 Evil Fortune Cookie Hardcore Max 2 Food Battle 2014 License Test Toy Airplane Food Battle X Finger Guns Google Glass SUCKS My Mutant Rash The NEW Smosh TV Show That Damn Shower EDITOR! Camp in a Van Sexual Sun Every Smosh Video Ever Addicted to Selfies Hide and Seek My Best Friend is a Robot How Google's Space Ship Failed Business Boy Emoji Curse Human Pokemon Battle Rejected Zelda Games We're Stuck in Fan Fiction

I LIKED THIS ONE

A Hairy Situation w/ Billy Mays Anthony's Death That Damn Prison Break Anthony's Resurrection Evil AI Tried to Kill Me We Summoned a Demon Help I Became an NPC Stranded Transformers Theme How Not to Make a First Impression The Best Car EVER Reunited? The HauntingMale Model Replacement Needed Easy Step April First Evil Chain Letter Power Rangers Theme Life as Ghosts Ep 1-4 Crybaby I'm Not Racist Pokemon In Real Life 2 The BEST Bottled Water Meeting My Identical Twin I Killed the Tooth Fairy Guys' Guide to Hugging Guys My Real Pet Pikachu Homeless Millionaire The Ditto - Movie Trailer Meat In Your Mouth I Love Lou Ferigno Anthony Poses for Playgirl?! Vader and Me Killer Teddy Bear That Damn Punishment Arm Wrestling TO THE DEATH If Superheroes Were Real Worst Twist Endings Ever I'm Naked Pokemon In Real Life 3 How to Cover Up a Murder The World's First Internet Tutorial Motion Games Suck I'm Possessed By a Demon Addicted to Honey Boo Boo Child My New Best Friend is a Robot My Weird Addiction Food Battle 2013 Assassins Creed 4 Song So Many Hickies Guns Suck My Morning Routine Guy's Guide to Being Manly Jurassic Pokemon Magic iPad 21 Things I'd Rather Do Than Smoke Netflix Rap Video Game Items In Real Life My Hot Online Girlfriend Murder Party

[alexisnoir]

Turning poison into positivity

Now that I had time to process the last episode of season 2 of OFMD, took out my anger and frustration out on few dick-ish customers at work (they deserved it!), took on vaping in the span of one day (not very good for my health but that's just life). I can finally focus on the show itself and what I did love about it.

I loved it as a whole because we finally got what we fans yearned for for years sometimes, I know I have. Love between two characters without judgement of the outside, where their journey is not too colorized but painted in various color of life - like heartbreak, hurt, love, anger, sadness, hope, excitement and so on.

We finally got many characters we can relate to without fear of being told we see too much into something. What we see is what we get (most of the time but let's not let poison back in)

I enjoyed Roach this season, he was more sure of himself, tried to take command of the Blackbeards crew, be their balast so to speak.

Archie is very nice addition, I liked her character, she's a bit like me, doesn't hide from a fight and can kick ass when needs to but can be soft when needs too. What I missed this season is where and when they picked her up. Hopefully when Season 3 happens we will get that information and a bit more of her backstory

Zheng, well I don't know what to think of her, her character is okay, too short of a season to really pass out judgement. I neither loved her nor hated her. She was just there.

Absolutely fell in love with Wee John this season and his seagoddess Calypso! You can't not fall in love with him for that!

Stede and Ed both went through a journey. Stede of course from a child to a young adult and Ed from angry hurt man, to finding peace of mind, at least some form of a peace. He learned thanks to Fang how to center himself, how to quiet himself which in turn will help him keep his more negative emotions at bay.

The season as a whole was very good alas a bit too short but what can we do on cut budget right? If only I had million to spare I'd gladly pay for the next season myself and get 20+ 40 minutes episodes

What are my hopes for the next season?

Well, as I mentioned in one of my previous posts I'd love for Mary, Doug and the kids to come back and meet Ed and the rest of the crew.

Now that we know that the weasel of a prince is out there, I hope the Revenge crew alongside Stede and Ed will hunt him down and serve justice to him for what he did to Izzy. Hopefully it's going to be a theme for the next season - the REVENGE.

As to anything else...

a dance between Stede and Ed, we need to see that and since THAT LOOK of Ed's toward Stede at Lucius and Pete wedding, I can safely bet we would get a wedding dance between these two - if we are lucky

no more death

Izzy coming back

Stede and Ed taking on a responsibility for another person - a child. Just like Ed was somehow taken care of by pirates after running away after killing his father it would be interesting to see his take on someone young and in need with Stede helping him. Let's not forget Stede has some experience in taking care of for children

Stede and Ed renovating that shack into an Inn. I'd love to see some of the process, even as a montage

the Revenge crew visiting them on their island, getting them supplies, having parties etc

THE TALK - I need them to talk through their emotions, their grief

This is more like a speculation but I'd not be surprised if Ricky the dick went after Stede's family as a Revenge. Which paints a interesting plot IMHO

That is for now. I may or may not add something later, you will know if you find the word EDIT somewhere below in the future.

[10byten]

Yuta's Collab

Summary : You met Yuta at a musical social event. And and between the two of you a beautiful alchemy is born 

Warning : Y/N and Yuta discover each others, beginning of a relationship, SMUT at some point.

Words : 5000

You accidentally entered the men's room and came face to face with him. He looked at you surprised but amused by the situation. 

"I didn't know they had a gender-neutral restroom here. I'm pleasantly surprised" he looks you up and down, it really is a pleasant surprise for him. 

"Sometimes you have to push the progress yourself." You wonder where you got the confidence to say that, since you're usually the stressed-out, self-conscious type. 

He raises an eyebrow and laughs at your answer. "If everyone thought the same way, things would move faster. I'm Yuta, I identify myself as a man, wait...no man suits me fine" he holds out his hand, with polished nails. You hold out yours in return and introduce yourself: "by the way, nails, plus the rings, I love it, what a classy man.”

He smiles proudly, "it takes all the right things to look your best in society, doesn't it? As for me, I love your piercing", he heads for the bathroom door and turns back to you, "maybe we can continue our conversation in a place with more champagne than soap?” A woman like you deserves to be wooed somewhere a little classier.

Is this guy for real, is this smile for you? Whatever, you’re on it. 

He grabs two glasses of champagne from the bar and gives you one "so tell me, what do you do for a living that made our paths cross at this party".

"You mean apart from campaigning for non-binary toilets around the world? I'm a production assistant in the company that organizes this event, my job is to make sure everything is ok when you, artists, start to release an album." 

"You, artists? So you know who I am? Or did you deduce I was an artist because of my vibes haha?"

"Maybe a bit of both" you wink at him "ok maybe I know you're a Japanese rockstar who got lost in a Korean band." 

"god damn, no one has ever summed up my life so well, a fan of those Korean boy bands?" he pricks your heart.

"I might have already listened to some of your music, just to find out, after all, our two labels are going to sign a partnership. We're about to become your first distributors in Europe, I take my job very seriously you know".

"I can see that, I'll be sure to underline the investment of our collaborators at SM during our next meeting" you both laugh and continue your conversations on the terrace. 

He lights a cigarette and asks you "so what's your final destination, I mean your goal, your ambitions, I'm curious." 

"hmm probably to open my own agency but to produce only young emerging talent, whose music is a bit offbeat. I'm not looking for big talents who will become the next Rihanna or Ed Sheeran. I'd like to collaborate with people whose music is more psychedelic. I can see how that might be lazy, but I prefer things that are more human, on a smaller scale." 

"I've got a buddy for you if you go for it haha, one of my collaborators is totally into that sort of thing. If you know us, you must surely see who Taeyong is, our leader?"

"Yes, that's right, I think he's already gone solo. How bout you? Would you like to go your own way?

"Obviously, I'm just waiting for the right moment. 

"And is the right moment coming soon?"

"Production assistant ? Wouldn't you rather be a journalist?" he shoves you gently, laughing. 

"I take you three floors below this party, to the studios, and in exchange you give me a preview of what we should be getting soon" you give him a look of defiance.

What's certain about Yuta is that he's never been the kind of guy to wait quietly for the party to end and go home, and a challenge is something that stimulates him, especially when it's thrown down by an attractive woman.

"deal beauty”

You catch two champagne glasses on the way and sneak with him to the elevator on which you swipe your badge, the studio floor is only accessible to company members. 

"Ready to give it all, Nakamoto?"

"Never been this ready" 

You drag him into one of the first studios. "Okay, I'll throw you a beat and you show me what you've got in mind". 

"Just try not to fall in love when you hear my voice" he teases you before walking through the studio door.

You throw in a Chase Atlantique-style beat and let Yuta get started. To your surprise, he follows up as if he'd had something prepared for weeks. As if he'd been working on this session for a while. You know a real artist when you hear one, you think, stunned by his set. 

The beat ends and you look at him, still fascinated. You didn't know this guy could sing so well, but what was he doing in a band? Why didn't he launch a solo career and let his talent shine? And above all, how could anyone be so handsome as well as so talented. 

He looks at you, a devastating smile on his lips, and exits the recording booth. "I think I handled the challenge pretty well considering your reaction." You blush a little at his words and feel like a first-year intern meeting an artist for the first time. "I'm speechless, I must admit. When's your solo album again?" you ask ironically.

"It all depends on whether I find the right people to work on it with, do you know any?"

 he's looking at you intently now, you can hear the invitation he's extending, you just don't know if it's still music he’s talking about...

Anyway, you're at work and you'd never dare cross those boundaries. 

You shake your head to clear it of any sexual ideas. 

"Is this a collab proposal? because it looks like the next few days, shall I say weeks, have just suddenly become available in my schedule."

You both burst out laughing, and he moves closer to you, holding out his hand again to shake, as if to conclude a deal.

"Deal" he says to you, you hold out your hand to do things the conventional way. He grabs it and pulls you closer, you find yourself pressed against him. He leans his face over yours and almost whispers in your ear, "I'm really looking forward to collaborating with you and showing you everything I'm capable of." His breath is warm and he smells an intoxicating mixture of champagne and light menthol he took after his cigarette. You feel a wave of shivers run through your body and you almost feel as if your legs are going to give out. This guy really does have a strange intimidating power over you. His attitude charms you; it's not that of a predator, but rather of a passionate man showing his interest. You hold his gaze as best you can to avoid showing any sign of weakness that would discredit you. A sparkle passes through his eyes when he sees your iron will. 

You search deep inside yourself and manage to retort with a slight waver in your voice, "so I'm waiting for you Yuta, I won't tolerate any disappointment."

You wake up next morning wondering if it was all a dream, but you know it wasn't when you hear your cell phone vibrate. Your boss is on the starting block. Last night, after leaving the studio and going back up to reception, you and Yuta had talked to your respective managers about a potential project. To which both men responded positively. The idea is a good one, and quite feasible. On the other hand, Yuta's stay wasn't supposed to last more than a few days, so you had to get things up and running quickly and complete the project quickly. The studio appointment was for 9am this morning and you were to discuss creation. You'd spent the rest of the night talking with Yuta on the terrace. You'd even seen the dawn breaking, which is what made you decide to leave each other, with much regret.

Yuta arrives with coffee for everyone except you, he gets you a lemon tea, which you told him the day before you loved. A gesture you really appreciate, and you thank him sincerely, turning his cheek and tapping it with his forefinger to invite you to give him a kiss. You won't let his action go unrewarded and give him a peck. He smiles and winks at you to let you know you're getting "special" treatment. Are you really starting to fall for this guy? It seems so. But business is business and you go into concentration mode, it's time to work.

The day you thought you'd love, which is partly the case, quickly becomes an ordeal. Every gesture, every smile, every damn sound, every look from Yuta sends you to another planet. This guy is going to lose you your job, you're hanging on his every word and you're off to other galaxies as soon as he opens his mouth. The end of your session approaches, night falls and everyone present gradually leaves the studio, leaving you alone at last. You realize it may be time for a breath of fresh air and grab your things. 

"Verdict on this first day?"

You put on your jacket and reply, "I don't think I've ever worked with someone so prepared. Is it an Asian thing or just you haha?" 

He opens the studio door for you to get out and replies, "I had all these models ready for a while, so that made the work easier. As I said, I'd already thought about this solo before. And yes, in Korea people like things to be fluid when you go into the studio." 

You shake your head, impressed by this man, his work, his talent, his charisma, his presence. "You really have to live it to understand it."

He smiles at you, questioning, "What's that?"

You slump against the wall of the elevator, exhausted by the day. "My supervisor once told me that to discover a good artist when you meet one, someone with a flame, you have to live it to understand it. I've worked with some great artists since I've been here, but I already knew them and listened to them before collaborating with them. For me, you're a total discovery, and I think I understand what he taught me that day. What a slap !”

"Ah stop I'll end up blushing" Yuta smiles through his teeth, slightly embarrassed but proud of the words you've just said to him. 

"I mean it Yuta, you're a fucking star, I really see this collaboration as a privilege. You're incredible, plus being able to watch you all day, my god what a treat."  You realize you've totally forgotten yourself on that last sentence and widen your eyes. You stammer as you try to catch yourself, but you know it's already too late. Your words are already out and you have to accept it. You put your head in your hands as if to hide your shame. "Okay I've just made a fool of myself so please don't talk to me again and ignore me until tomorrow I'm running away when the doors open." the elevator ding rings, you run off at a run and you hear him calling you with an adorable laugh. 

Yuta: it's a pity you ran away, I'd have liked to take you out to dinner to thank you for your work. But if you show up again tomorrow, maybe we can plan it for tomorrow night? 

You bite your lip and feel all the more stupid for running off so quickly. This guy makes you feel like a teenage girl in front of her high school crush. You slap your forehead and curse yourself for your reaction. 

You decide to ignore the message and try to make up for it tomorrow.

You arrive at the studio slightly late, to make sure you're not alone with him. Everyone's already there, as you'd expected, and Yuta looks at you amused, seeing how you're avoiding any contact with him. You're definitely a funny girl. You avoid looking at him or talking to him all morning and finally Yuta asks to interrupt the session at midday for today. He asks to enjoy the city this afternoon, which nobody objects to. You get dressed quickly and get out before everyone else to avoid any awkward moments, so you take the stairs. In your haste, you haven't noticed that Yuta has followed you. He catches the door behind you, grabs your wrist and turns you over, pinning you against the wall. Why is he doing this? Part of you feels really excited by this action.  

"Yesterday you didn't give me time to answer you", he puts a hand on your hip and plunges his big dark eyes into yours, "I must say, I've never enjoyed going into the studio so much. Being able to spend my days looking at you and imagining all the things we could do if the others weren't there. That's what I like best about working with you.”

You didn't expect so much, but that's all it takes for you to jump down his throat. You think back to the fact that you've never used your vibrator as much as you have in the last 48 hours, since this guy came into your life. Your fantasy becomes reality: you're making out with Nakamoto Yuta on the stairs of your agency. He stops suddenly and puts his finger to his mouth to tell you to be quiet. He hears the last people leaving the floor by elevator. And lifts you up in one swift movement to carry you in his arms. 

"I'm flattered by such ardor, but I think a slight punishment is in order for the attitude I received yesterday and for no response to my message" his voice has become deeper and intimidating, bossy.

He sets you down on the studio chair and takes off your jacket. You look at him like a scared deer. God, you're so sexy with that innocent look, especially when he knows you're far from it. He senses your wild, depraved side. You're a sweet girl who can be the best slut if pushed. He'll know how to push you. He takes off your top and undoes his belt, "stretch your arms back." You obey and moan as he tightens the leather around your wrists. He moves back to the front and licks your bottom lip, the warmth of his breath driving you crazy. "Doesn't that hurt?" you shake your head to say you're ok. He finally kisses your mouth, then your jaw and finally your neck. "You realize this is my workplace" he raises his head as if annoyed by your words "it could have been my bed or yours, but for that you'd have to answer me of course. And please call me master for the rest of this time".

You close your eyes, the mere sound of his voice in your ears driving you crazy, but the end of that sentence sends a wave of shivers through your body. You clench around nothing. He watches your thighs close in search of friction. He smiles and moves down from your neck to your chest, pulling down your bra and gently licking your nipple, nibbling it and moving on to the next, massaging and licking it relentlessly, you try to remain discreet for fear of being overheard by someone in the corridor. A little moan comes from between your teeth as you feel his teeth against your nipple again. He continues his descent down your belly, following the trace of your navel. He unbuttons your jeans and discovers a tattoo on your hip. He looks at you astonished, "I never thought I'd discover so many treasures hidden here, you're full of surprises." You feel like a pampered goddess. He yanks off your jeans and caresses the edges of your panties, "may I?" You lean your head back, "please master". "hmm my good girl really understood quicly" he buries his head between your thighs and covers them with burning kisses.

He grabs the top of your panties and pulls to create pressure on your clitoris. He licks your core through the textile. You moan, needing more, wanting more. You've never felt such need, such desire for someone. He runs a finger over you to gently caress your folds, you feel you could explode. Then he suddenly stands up and kisses you. He in turn removes his top and jeans, without taking his eyes off you. You watch him, biting your lip, as you finally see his spear appear. He moves closer to you and puts his hand around your throat, "Do you want me?" "More than anything, Master" you answer in the most confident tone of your life. He grasps a part of your shadow, a darkness you could only show in the most secret, intimate setting. "Prove it to me" you don't lose contact with his gaze and you grasp his cock with your mouth with your arms still attached. You'd never been so nimble with just your mouth. But your desire was too strong. Your lips meet his tip and you see him close his eyes in pleasure. He feels himself going to heaven, how can you be so good just with your mouth. You deepen your thrust and achieve a deep throat that wrings a grunt of pleasure from him. You're still watching him, your eyes filling with tears from the lack of air and the sensation of his glans touching the back of your throat. But you don't let go, you wait after him, a sign, you can push your limits for him. "You can release, thank you sweetie" you gently pull up his long cock and finish with a kiss on his tip. "Anything you say master." He tilts his head to the side "how can you be so perfect, I think you're going to drive me completely insane." you smile proudly at his words. He's got you in the palm of his hand, but the feeling seems to be mutual and fills you with satisfaction.  

He lifts you up and slips his fingers between your legs, "my turn to satisfy you, I think."

You close your eyes and let him begin his dance. He gently caresses your inner thighs and slowly works his way up to your intimacy. He brushes against it and plays his fingertips over your folds, as if you were a piano keyboard whose keys must be touched with care. You moan with pleasure, this moment seems endless and the most exciting of your life. You don't think at all about the fact that you're naked in your workplace, tied up by a collaborating artist who's also naked, trying to get you into paradise. What a scandal if someone were to open that door right behind you. Whatever the moment, it was worth all the punishment it might bring.

Yuta never exerts any pressure; all you feel is a light caress, like a breeze on her intimacy, your clitoris particularly stimulated. You've never been caressed like this, either by a sexual partner or by yourself. It's an astonishing discovery; you didn't think that delicate friction could be more exciting than pressure or vibration. His ring finger passes over your now-soaked clitoris one last time. Then, with his two fingers, he pinches you, creating a friction. He watches you moan with pleasure and lose yourself in his neck. He grabs the tip of your chin with his free hand and looks into your eyes, searching for your climax. His gaze finishes you off, you feel the pleasure rise and rise inside you. He glances down and sees your thighs trembling, he knows "go on beauty, I can't wait to feel you dripping onto my fingers." That's all you needed, the wave of pleasure you've been waiting for all day finally sweeps through your body and lasts surprisingly longer than usual, lingering, exploding your heartbeat and leaving you breathless and powerless. Your legs wobble, Yuta catches you and lifts you into his arms.

"To much for you babygirl?". He unbuckles his belt to free your arms. Your head rests on his shoulder, you're already exhausted, this man is literally sucking the life out of you, and god, it's delicious. You need a moment to catch your breath and your spirits, during which time Yuta holds you in his arms in a rather comforting way. 

You finally lift your head and feel more determined than ever to exhaust your body with this man. He sees that animal gleam in your eyes, he knows what it means, you two aren't done yet. 

"Okay young lady, but if we're going for it I'm not here for joking, okay with you?"

"Same here, that's a deal."

You seem so full of confidence and self control, this attitude works like an aphrodisiac on him. 

You sit up astride him "I'm ready to ride my bull, master".

He plunges his eyes into yours and feels your ass before giving it a firm, dry spank. You let out a little cry of surprise, he starts again after another caress. "Be careful my angel, I'm in a turbulent mood."  You slide up and down his member. And finally after tilt your entrance, he inserts his tip into your hole. He stays there for a while, holding your hips up with no hands. He puts you to the test, you can't hold on any longer and sink completely onto him. He gives you a scolding look, as if to say you should have let him. He pushes into you a few times in a gentle way and then withdraws. He carries you to your feet, and you look up at him, questioning and desperate. He grabs your hair and turns you over. "I told you I was feeling wild. You should have let me.”

He pulls on your hair to arch you, your ass is now well exposed in front of his cock, he approaches your ear and whispers "safeword is butterfly, never hesitate to use it baby girl." You're really in a cheeky mood and reply in a provocative tone, "make me, push my bounds Nakamoto." He sneers and straightens up, still holding your hair in a firm grip. He grabs his belt lying on his side and caresses each of your buttocks with the leather. He raises his hand and lightly whips you a first time, you grit your teeth at the sensation, a pleasant pain. "I'm going to increase the force a little each time, I'll stop when you let me hear a moan of pleasure." You loosen your teeth to give him a "yes master". He starts caressing your ass again with the tip of his leather and whips you again, you love the sensation but the intensity isn't strong enough for you yet. You arch your back a little more, as if to ask for more. He smiles, you're about to become his favorite distraction. He repeats his gesture 5 times and then you finally let out a cry of pleasure. He's found it, the perfect intensity, the one that pinches but sends a wave of pleasure through you. He releases your hair and leans down to kiss each of your now red buttocks. "Good girl. Now let me enter again." He hasn't even finished his sentence when you feel him at the entrance of your pussy and he pushes in with a sharp thrust. "You seemed to be in a hurry earlier, I wouldn't keep you waiting any longer," each of his loins thrusts sends you into nirvana. He pushes faster and faster, harder and harder. And you feel your brain liquefy, he's taken total control over you, your body and above all your pleasure. You feel like a doll in his hands, he could make you do anything. Isn't that a bit the case already?

Each thrust of his hips gives you the feeling that he's going deeper and deeper inside you. This moment seems timeless. You've lost all track anyway. He stops to turn you over. You're not sure yourself, but you nod in agreement. "Good, I want to see you when you chase your next orgasm." he sits back in the chair you were in before and taps his thighs. "Come on, show me how you can bounce this hot booty on me.”

You don't know how you'll manage to stand on him with your legs barely supporting you, but you're dying to. You reach over and straddle him, put your arms around his neck and kiss him passionately. He responds with equal enthusiasm. You align yourself with him and feel him enter again. He fits you so well, as if you'd been a jewel box made for him. You hop up and down on him, causing your chest to bounce, Yuta can't take his eyes off it. "Your the sexiest collaborator I've ever had." You smile at his words, him telling you he thinks you're sexy makes you want to pick up the pace. And you do, you almost twerk on his lap, he'd dream of having a mirror on the opposite wall to see your ass bouncing with every move. You see in his eyes that there's a lot going on in his head and you'd like to know what he's thinking, what fantasies he's indulging in, what he'd dream of doing to you. You slow down, exhausted, your body starting to fail. He grabs your ass in his firm, veiny hands. "Don't worry love, I handle it" he winks at you. "You've been so good, you deserve some rest." 

What you take away from this moment when you've completely lost your mind is that you've never been fucked so hard and so well. You almost feel as if your soul has left your body, you blackout. You feel his hand grab your chin and lean in to kiss you. The touch of his lips, his breath on your skin, that's all you need, you feel a wave run through you again. And then you explode, calling out his name repeatedly, earning him a devastating smile. He feels your body vibrate against him and become fragile. He slows down his thrusts because he sees you can't take it anymore. You stay in his arms until you come to your senses, feeling his heartbeat. When you feel your mind is a little clearer, you straighten up and kneel before him. "My master hasn't finished yet, I must please you."

"How lovely from you" he caresses your cheek with his thumb. 

You catch yourself ardently at the task and suck Yuta as if he were a delicious ice cream melting in the sun. He places a hand on your head to accompany your rhythm, you increase the frequency. He moans softly, you send him into seventh heaven with your mouth and tongue, which you wrap around his stick "How do you do that?" You look at him with innocent eyes, which makes him grunt. He presses down on your head so the tip of his cock touches the back of your throat. He holds you like this for a moment, and you feel his cock pulsing in your mouth "I'm coming angel, I need to know where do u want it?" he releases his grip on your head. You straighten it a little but keep Yuta in your mouth and look at him as if to give him permission. He ejaculates in a second, letting out a big sigh of pleasure. When he's done, you release his cock and hold his gaze as you swallow hard. He takes your face in his hands and kisses you for a long time. He leans over you and lays you down on your clothes spread out on the floor. You stand there for a moment, kissing and cuddling.

"I think we should really get dressed and get out of here before someone open the door to this studio and this scene becomes awkward." he nods and kisses you on the head before standing up.

In the elevator, you look into each other's eyes without saying a word. He tops himself on a floor where his manager enters "still here Yuta? Thought you want to visit try something new in this city." 

"Oh I've already tried something new, and I think I adore it." He doesn't take his eyes off you, and you blush at his words. 

Several days go by and Yuta never leaves your apartment, arriving at the studio together in the morning and leaving together on the evening, enjoying each other’s company. 

The chemistry between you is obvious, and everything is quite fluid and straightforward. His obligations force him to return to Korea. You both knew it wouldn't last, but you feel a twinge of sadness when the day of his departure arrives. You've spent this last night together, like all the others, and now spend the day in your office. Yuta leaves in the afternoon for the airport. You join him for a last cigarette on the roof terrace. He looks at you in the sunlight, you lean against the fence and watch him. You're going to miss this guy. "Do you believe in love at first sight?” He smiles "I believe that sometimes something inexplicable happens instantly between two people. And if that's your question, well yes I think that's what happened to us a few days ago, in the men's room of this very place." You laugh. You like his answer, deep down it's the one you've been waiting for. 

You hug him one last time, thank each other for the work you've done and for this week, and wish him a safe journey. He teases you before leaving, "Don't ever work with another Japanese guy, I'll be offended". "I'll try my best, promise, see ya buddy." 

He winks at you "Till next time".

You laugh at those last words and let him go. 

You feel alone as he leaves. During that long week, he had taken up a lot of space in your life. When you wake up the next morning, it feels like a dream, like he was never really there. But when you get to the office, you receive a message.

"Well home, I got to admit I already miss you. But guess who's coming for the fashion week. Next time won't be long, I hope you'll find time in your schedule for ur japanese guy."

You couldn't have started your day any better: "I'll book all my days for u dear. Can't wait to see ya. By the way I miss u to. " 

"Wait for me beauty, I'll be back soon."

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hey quick question - can you get HPV that causes cervical cancer without having sex?? I know not all HPV is sexually transmitted, but am unclear on that cause there's a lot of different varieties. My gynecologist like. refuses to give me a straight answer when I ask and when I said I have 0 desire for sex (aroace extremely uninterested in sex), she still didn't answer and told me I should think about the fact that idk what's going to happen in the future; that i might meet someone and change my mind or that I'll probably be sexually assaulted based on stats, which was a fucking weird thing to say to a patient asking a sex-ed question imo so I stopped pushing for an answer

hi anon,

oh boy! between your gynecologist and this doctor who claimed that everyone has a little endometriosis another anon experienced recently, not to mention the COUNTLESS other dismissive and misinformed healthcare providers I've heard about over the years, I may need to start some kind of rehab center.

so, this actually isn't a difficult question.

quoth the Center for Disease Control: "Long-lasting infection with certain types of human papillomavirus (HPV) is the main cause of cervical cancer." (note: there are many types of HPV, but only two cause cancer.) and quoth the National Cancer Institute: "Virtually all cervical cancers are caused by HPV."

okay, so your odds of getting cervical cancer without HPV are PRETTY LOW. but how do you get HPV? it's not just penis-in-vagina sex!

quoth Planned Parenthood: "HPV is easily spread from sexual skin-to-skin contact with someone who has it. You get it when your vulva vagina, cervix, penis, or anus touches someone else’s genitals or mouth and throat — usually during sex. HPV can be spread even if no one cums, and even if a penis doesn’t go inside the vagina/anus/mouth."

listen, I don't know if you're gyno was squidged out about how to define "sex" or what, but if you're never planning on engaging on any genital and/or orifice touching of any kind, I'd say your risk factor is astronomically low.

I'm unsure what your gynecologist was hoping to accomplish by reminding you of the looming specter of sexual assault; seems like a bit of a healthcare party foul to put it extremely mildly. if you're under the age of 26 and haven't already been vaccinated against HPV I'd still broadly recommend getting that done, because I love vaccines and you can never be too safe, but god. what an unhinged way to talk to your patient.

[esperata]

End of year wip round-up

Time to look through my files of notes and see what plots I have still waiting attention, and perhaps assess where they are in the scale of projects. Colour coded for riddlebird, hattercrow, wahsbands or octogoblin. I'm always open to questions on my projects. In fact, please do ask if you want to encourage them to be written.

Starting with some I have posted as unfinished works.

OTT (LEGO Batman) : I intend to post a second chapter for this, showing how well Riddler's plan turns out.

Gay Attorney (Gotham/Ace Attorney) : This is supposed to have multiple chapters with the various 'witnesses' taking the stand.

Little Bird (Batwoman) : Not sure where this is heading but a follow up chapter seems necessary.

P.I. Riddler (DC comics) : I have an outline of the idea for this but not sure how many chapters it will require to complete.

Urban Legends (Batman - all media) : There is going to be a continuation here with other rogues making an appearance.

What Is Reality? (Btas) : I already have a second chapter started and a concept of where its going, including a 'final' scene.

A few extra Mahou AU story ideas.

Killer Croc vs Jonathan (Arkhamverse) : This is an interesting conflict I'd like to write.

Grown up Ed gets powers (Burtonschumacher) : We only saw one half of this duo in my first story so it seems fair to bring in Riddler.

Take A Chance on Me (Arkhamverse) : Pitting the pair against the machinations of Hugo Strange.

Oz mentors Ed (The Batman) : Does what it says on the tin.

The Curse of Alice (1960s) : Again an interesting development I'd like to explore.

Future Hattercrow (Gotham) : Not sure about this but considering this pair twenty years further on.

The Telltale series.

You Only Live Twice : Oswald is being mentored but demands Edward treat him as an equal if he truly respects him.

For Your Eyes Only : Edward gets trapped by the Agency and suffers their virus before returning to Oswald.

The Spy Who Loved Me : Oswald helps Edward through the aftereffects, unwilling to lose anyone else to madness.

Live and Let Die : Riddler is planning his return to Gotham, letting Oswald into the secrets of his past to convince him.

The Living Daylights : A continuation of the story arc.

New stand alone ideas.

Babysitter : Wario is cajoled into babysitting Bowser's kids and calls Waluigi in for reinforcements.

Sherrif Wario : Waluigi rides into town and immediately gets called a trouble maker by the Mario bros. Wario makes his own assessment.

Good Omens : A friend suggested Alfred Molina as Aziraphale and Willem Dafoe as Crowley which is a fantastic idea.

Fate Or Something Like It : I really wanted to consider the timeline after Norman got back from No Way Home. How he might try to save Otto from his fate.

Old Friends, Bitter Enemies : I watched the Spider-man PS game and love the dynamic of Norman and Otto. It would be worth playing with.

Skyscraper : Basically a PWP. Be fun to write.

Misunderstandings : Oswald overhears Ed saying something he shouldn't.

Batman vs Dracula (2004 cartoon) : A re-write of the film except bringing Riddler into the story.

Halloween Topsy Turvy : A fancy dress party at the Lounge causes feelings to run high.

Streamer Ed (btas) : Ed works as a streamer, with Jon and Jervis as mods, and a habit of review Iceberg Lounge promotional videos.

Gotham Gossip (Gotham) : Newspaper column style fic charting their rising and falling relationship. I still like this concept but am struggling with the media.

Kids museum meeting (comics) : A look back at how they might have met as children.

Secret Admirer : Where both Oswald and Ed are the other's secret admirer.

Tattoos (comics) : Oswald has tattoos - Ed is intrigued.

Olga My Queen (1960s/Gotham) : What if the Queen of Cossacks was Oswald's maid?

Gotta Shape Up (Harley Quinn series) : ngl I lost impetus with this show but I still like this idea - Ed having to step up with Joshua after Oswald's demise.

The King Is Dead : Similar concept in that it looks at how Riddler might react in the wake of Penguin's demise.

Wrap You Around My Finger : Ed is new to Gotham and thinks it'll be easy to cajole favours from Penguin. He is wrong.

Western AU : I wanted a fic with Jonathan on a horse thus this idea was born.

Are We Friends? (Gotham) : Ed struggles to pin down just what their relationship is during Oswald's eye recovery period. Again, not super confident writing in this media now.

Rogues Go Skiing (LEGO) : Cutesy vacation style slice of life.

Arkham sitcom : Exactly as it says, chapters done with mini plots happening, all within Arkham asylum.

Bookshop (1960s) : Penguin owns a book store and has suitors competing for him - Riddler vs Bookworm

Pre-Arkham : What if Jon and Jervis met before either became rogues?

Trans Oswald (The Batman) : Not actually a romantic fic but more angsty, considering what if he'd had a child in his younger years.

Merman Oz (2004 cartoon) : I just like the visual of him as a mermaid.

What You Love Most (Arkhamverse) : Another angsty piece where Ed doesn't realise Oswald's feelings.

Drive-in Movie (Batwheels) : Simultaneous riddlebird and Ducky/Quizz.

Music Meister (Arkhamverse) : Don't tell me the concept of Oz being forced to sing isn't hilarious.

Rumour Mill : Jonathan steps in when rumours spread about Jervis.

Trans Ed (Arkhamverse) : I wanted to write Oz facing his own transphobia but I'm not sure I can do the topic with the required sensitivity.

Hypnotism : As a hattercrow fan, its almost a rite of passage to write Jervis using his powers on Jon.

Merry Little Batman : I'm always drawn to new media variations.

More continuations.

The World Is Your Oyster sequel : What would life be like living with an octo-person?

Post Game (Arkhamverse) : A possibly final installment to my arkham Games series.

Nobody Said It Was Going To Be Easy sequel (btas) : Not sure this is something I still want to do honestly.

The Boss (The Batman) : Picking up their story post film.

Angel!Ed/Demon!Oz (2004 cartoon) : Bringing the contrasting pair actually together.

Pax Penguina sequel (Gotham) : I have no impetus to continue this one at present.

The Real Deal sequel (btas) : Considering whether Ed might get his own larger than life Penguin doll.

The King Of Gotham sequel (comics) : Picking up where the story ends off. Not finished posting the original yet.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

pleeease tell me more about this drug dealer/sex worker/rich client au you're rotating in your mind. it sounds incredible

Ok so I project onto Ed and I'm a sex worker, so, that's where this AU is born from. It's not my only job I do it as a side hustle the way that people sell bottle cap earrings on Etsy, but that's not the energy I necessarily have for this au.

So basically Ed's an out and out hooker, a sleep with clients for your only job kinda hooker, been doing it since he was young. Started working the street and then through a series of being extra charismatic to the right people he started a rapport with some more prestigious ladies of the night and wealthier johns and became one of those fancy high end escorts. Jack is a drug dealer whose one of Ed's clients from back in the day and they're... friends? I guess. He's also over time worked his way up in that industry so he keeps being able to afford Ed's increasing rates and they hang out outside of fucking so Jack is getting the friends discount, the only reason he still has to pay is because they were escort and client before they were friends and Ed's not gonna tell him to stop paying him. Now, Stede is a very rich guy who is having a sexuality crisis and he deals with that by paying an escort (Ed) behind his wife's back, just to try it out. Ed is actually kind of sick of his job, but this isn't like a oh poor hooker who needs to be saved thing its just a "used to like doing this, not really having fun anymore, but what else am I gonna do? Other things also sound like they suck pretty bad and mostly I just want to retire." And then he meets Stede who is like truly so sweet to him (which in my experience a lot of clients are actually rather sweet) and they click really well and they continue seeing each other, but Ed's life and Stede's life are very different. Like Ed's got all these criminal connections and he uses drugs recreationally (but in a non addict way where you like do a little bit on the weekends at a party and then be done the next day because like 90% of why I would write this fic if I did is because every time hookers and drug users get portrayed they're always very self destructive and while I respect those people and know some of them that is simply not my experience of sex work or drug use) vs Stede who has up to this point been very straight laced, but is having the most dramatic midlife crisis imaginable. So what ends up happening is Ed accidentally enables Stede to go careening off the rails, because he was always gonna do that, if it wasn't with Ed it was gonna be with some other hooker and his opportunist drug dealer bff.

Now, I mentioned this fic in the tags on a post about Izzy. That said this is not an Izzy fic, this is a blackbonnet fic with Jack causing problems in a non antagonist way on the side where the end game is Stede gets a divorce and Ed gets to retire on Stede's dime and they fall madly in love and Stede gets better because he's no longer in a failing marriage or trying to lead a double life. However if I had to put Izzy in it Izzy would be an annoying client of Ed's who is transparently in love with him in a creepy way, but if I were to actually write the fic I'd be a thousand times more likely to include Frenchie, for example, than I would be to include Izzy, just because if I'm gonna make Ed semi well adjusted he needs at least one non Jack friend and Frenchie is your guy, when looking for an Ed bestie.

Like I certainly don't want to romanticize sex work or drug use but I do absolutely want to de-stigmatize it. Like all of 5 people would read this fic if I wrote and published it so it's not that serious but also sex work is truly just a job and it is possible for some people to use drugs without without becoming addicted. And you know these guys are murderers for their job in universe so I don't see why I can't have an au where they do way less sketchy crimes than that.

[author-a-holmes]

Day 12 of the #fictionwriterchallenge - Who Are Your Writing Heroes?

I have a lot of authors I admire, and who I'd give my left kidney to meet for an afternoon and chat with.

Just, have a dinner and discuss the craft of writing.

Question of the day; If you could invite six authors, alive or dead, to a dinner party, who would you invite?

Top of my list has to be Neil Gaiman. A true legend, and everything I see him post on social media just makes me think he's a genuinely lovely human being too.

I'd also have to include Tolkien, Richelle Meade, Jim Butcher, Emily Bronte, and David Eddings (& Leigh Eddings? They were a writing duo, so I might get away with sliding them both in.)

[fillejondrette]

i remember you went to a women's only college. what was it like? would you have continued a women's only law school if there was such a thing?

thank you for a question that will allow me to put off studying for several more minutes <3

so i LOVED going to a women's college, although it wasn't something i prioritized when i was applying to colleges. i was deciding between smith (where i ended up going) and a co-ed school and i kind of decided on a whim to go to a women's college, because it'd be a unique experience i wouldn't have otherwise, unless i became a nun lol.

as you'd imagine a lot of the students are gay/bi, and this is reinforced by the fact that a lot of straight students seemed to go to nearby co-ed colleges for parties etc. as one straight smith student told me, "smith parties are just girls making out and someone crying in the corner." so obviously it was fun to go to parties that were pretty much all women, aside from maybe a few guys who were there with their girlfriends.

classes were generally all women, although smith belongs to the five college consortium so there were sometimes male students in smith classes (and we as smith students could take classes at the other colleges as well). i majored in history and did my concentration in women's history, and it was amazing to 1) have access to so many women's history classes and 2) be in class only with other women.

maybe the best aspects were getting used to seeing women in positions of power and in male-dominated subjects, and to seeing women in their natural state. (obviously there were some women who would shave their legs etc. but it wasn't the norm like it is in general society.) when i came to law school and the student body president, VP, and treasurer were all male, with only a female secretary, it was really surprising. like what is this 1950s bullshit lol. so yes i definitely would have gone to a women's law school if there were any. it took a long time to adjust to a co-ed environment in law school. sometimes i'd be in a small group with only women and then go out in the hall and see male students walk by and do a double take lol. i just wasn't used to it.

now as for the bad things: i felt like smith was more strict than other schools in terms of things like shutting down unauthorized parties. however i don't really have anything to compare it to, so idk. maybe it's similar at small co-ed liberal arts schools.

i would say that there was more pressure for ideological conformity re: gender compared to law school, but again, that might apply to small liberal arts schools in general. for example, in small classes where you're expected to introduce yourself at the beginning of the semester, you'd generally be asked to give your pronouns, which i don't think ever happened in law school. i started undergrad in 2016 and even though i fully conformed to gender ideology it felt kind of ridiculous, because generally there'd be like 16 "she/hers" and then maybe one "they/them" in the class.

i also had a friend who was reprimanded by a professor for referring to smith as a women's college rather than a historically women's college. there was definitely a demonization of "terfs." i started questioning some of my beliefs about gender in undergrad thanks to the above terfy friend, but i wouldn't say it fully clicked until the pandemic. based on my experience, i would say that if you openly expressed "terfy" opinions at smith, you'd definitely risk social ostracization by some people. but at the same time there are no doubt other women with similar opinions who are afraid to express them, so by being up-front you could meet likeminded women.

[foxes-that-run]

2013 Haylor Timeline

Timeline Tag, or years, 2012 2014

3 January hair pinned up at restaurant in Virgin Islands. Harry's "might as well.." Tattoo first seen. Covered with Ferns now.

4 January - Taylor's blue dress on a boat. Harry bite bruise on his hip

6 January - Harry seen in NY

7 January -Harry back in London, date People reports that they broke up. Reports Scott swift told them to slow down.

9 January - Harry seen GQ dinner London. photos of Harry in Richard Bransons hot hub on front page after the break up. (I often wonder what the less famous people think now that they treated him poorly as a kid and he is massive now). Gordon Smart (1:12, warning he follows it with a bad anecdote about 18 year old H), who worked on media for One Direction, said in 2020 that Harry had said:

"Simon Cowell actually paid me to do some media training with them back in the day so I met them before they were massive and they were again really lovely kids. [...] I wrote a front page story about him sharing a jacuzzi with a girl on holiday and he told me it was bollocks and we still ran it, because we had a picture of him in the jacuzzi. It was probably totally innocuous and I really I'd like to apologize unreservedly to Harry for that because it was an error of judgment on my part and it probably tarnished our friendship."

Richard Branson also has gross sounding comments about this 18 year old that day.

10 January - made fun of his accent at Grammy's, Harry at nightclub London

12 January when asked, Niall says he listens to WANGBT, Louis says and Harry’s. 22 MV filmed.

15 January - one direction trip to Ghana for Red Nose Day comic relief

16 January - One Direction Tokyo, when movie scenes filmed

20 January - Harry in London

21 January - Taylor in London reports she saw Harry, Harry at friends house

22 January - Harry got the Butterfly and handshake tattoos

23 January - Taylor in Madrid before performing at the '40 Principales Awards'. H London

26 January Both at NRG Awards, 25 January Taylor posts Cannes Sunset situation. They both stayed in the Intercontinental Carlton Cannes Hotel.

27 January - Harry meeting with Simon Cowell Glasgow,

28, 30, 31 Jan, 1, 2, 4 , 8 Feb - Harry London, Leed 13 -16

1 February - Harry's 19th birthday. £5k tab, messy, wild party. Rumour that Taylor had booked a week in Italy which was cancelled

6 February - Savan Kotecha (WMYB writer) gave interview where he said 1D want to be write but can’t. Probably had left 1D already and doing press to build career. His last 1D credit is Happily. In 2017 praised (45 mins) Harry’s writing. In the later interview Savan also says he spent a year being sad after the 1D thing ended until Ariana came into work with him, (52mins) so that article may have been that he’d already left 1D. He said he was working on Emblem3 which may be the other bad project he talked about (released April).

10 February - Taylor at Grammy's, night Ed says inspired Tenerife Sea

18 February - Harry the Box Nightclub

21 February - both attend Brit awards - Taylor performs I knew you were trouble with Harry in the audience. In march she told the Sunday Times "Well, it's not hard to access that emotion when the person the song is directed at is standing by the side of the stage watching." She goes to an afterparty with Tom Odell and out with him the next night. Tom writes Country Star about Taylor and Harry wrote Happily about wishing they were together. Ed is asked if he would trust Harry around his girlfriend and he said “well he trusts me around his girlfriend so yeah I do. We’re friends we don’t do that.” Harry went on Nick Grimshaw from 6am a hungover.

23 February - 3 November - 1D Up all Night tour, start in Europe

7 March - Taylor sells Hyannis Point House at $1m profit

15 March - Taylor vanity fair article. Says Harry pursued her for a year before KCA, better part of a year after and it fell apart one night in London when he went out and he’s texting her to ask to see her again at the time of the interview. Pointed mentioned she was born in 1989, Easter egged wonderland, talks about Connor being 2 months and insignificant. Implies Harry was a rebound from JG and Connor was a Harry rebound. Says she’s looking for someone who is interested in her not her wiki page.

25 - 29 March - Harry in LA, then back to London

29 March - Taylor played “You're Not Sorry” in Newark. “I truly believe that when dealing with anybody you meet, you should start by trusting them. Any new friend you meet. Any new person you meet. I think you should truly believe the beat in them. And the first time that they tell you they’re sorry I think you should believe them. But then if they keep doing the same exact thing that they say they’re sorry for, that means one thing guys. That they’re not. Sorry.”- here. Appeared in Wonderland cover April 7, 2013

11 April - Louis says 'Taylor Swift' after Harry sings "I'm in love with you" in Little Things

18 April - Harry holmes chapel

20 April - TS on B stage song before “I Almost Do” in Tampa, FL. “everybody’s got like one, maybe two, I don't know how many you have, but at least one person in your life that doesn’t belong in your life anymore because maybe they hurt you or maybe it’s just over but you kind of want to call them sometimes. And you think better of it. But, you almost do it.”- here. Then a Red tour break till the 25th; One Direction tour break starting in Manchester till Paris on 29th. Louis stays in Europe,

23 April - Harry arrives alone in LA without the Peace ring

24 April - Neither Harry or Taylor seen. The day Harry got the ring

25 April - First day Peace Ring is seen. Harry has dinner with Rod Stewart, Rod then plays the Troubadour and Harry stayed at Rod Stewarts house. Taylor in Cleveland

28 April - Harry posts photo of sunglasses on beach. Taylor photographed in a gym in Los Angles. Wears the ring to leave LAX and there is an absolutely insane mob because he is there alone with no security.

29 April - Arrives in Paris alone, still wearing ring, described as a riot. The ring is in This is Us in Paris

April 30 - Taylor buys Holiday House Rhode Island for $18m cash

1 May - Everything has changed released as single

7 May - Harry goes on a party bus in Norway, photos of him drunk, with blonde and talks about party bus in interviews

18 May - Taylor posted rose’s with a Great Gatsby quote: “Just as things grow in fast movies, I had that familiar conviction that life was beginning over again with the summer...“

19 May - Taylor said to fans, pointly "You are the longest and best relationship I've ever had" at BBMAs and that she only writes about ex's she doesn't want to see again. In the press room she said

27 May - Taylor wrote Wish you Would

2 June - Taylor attended a pre-show meet and greet at KYGO radio in Denver where David Mueller allegedly reached under Taylors skirt. In 2015 he sued Taylor who counter sued. It was not resolved until 2017 when Taylor won damages of $1.

June - September Midnight Memories written with Happily

12 June Taylor on Grimmy, he says Trouble is the “best song ever” 4 times at 11 mins. Best song ever was released 22 July. :)

13 June - Never Gonna Dance Again tattoo seen when Harry got off a yacht in Miami, seemingly drunk, he was underage at the time lyrics from Wham song "Careless Whisper" about regret for being unfaithful. Grimmy had referred to it in September when Harry sung the song on radio

16 June 2013 - Louisville - Harry was feeling himself during “Last First Kiss” and at the end was flirting with someone in the crowd, he mimicked pole dancing then he kissed his heart tattoo

22 June - Taylor and Selena getting ice cream in Mystic Connecticut, near RI.

28 June - Harry seen with Paige

29 June - Taylor gets a fans face paint on her neck that looks like lipstick in Vancouver, Gaylor 'proof'. 1D NY

1 July - Harry cross tattoo NYC stayed at the Bowery Hotel NYC

6 July - both play in Pennsylvania, Taylor has a week off after, unseen. On the 8th Harry was sick on stage.

20 July - Harry on Ryan Seacrest in Niall’s place and says the rest of the band went back to uk on their break but he stayed in LA.

22 July - Best Song Ever released.

30 July - September GQ cover story where they badgered Harry about how many people he’d slept with (two)

6 August - Ed posts photo with Harry and snow patrol “Decent night with the ladz”

August 14 - Lover Journal: August 14, 2013, Watch Hill RI. Says she feels like a tiger in an enclosure, feels hunted, talks about paparazzi and cell phones. Also calls herself a rabbit, a flower growing in a sidewalk that is picked and how photos ruin a moment, online photos/comments and 'level of possession'.

25 August - VMAs, texting each other and shade, together at afterparty. Sang purple rain together at after party.

3 September - Harry tweeted 1975, Matty Healy told an interviewer that went from 4K followers to 15k in 10 minutes and they exchanged numbers and texted, made plans to meet up and he stood Harry up.

5 September - the 1975 cover WMYB in the live lounge

8 September - Taylor “"People think they know who I've dated and they just don't," "They don't know everything."

9 September - Harry badgered by paparazzi till he cries in London. They called him a womaniser. GQ Article where the interviewer bullied him into how many partners he had has (2)

10 September - Media that they had a heart to heart at VMAs

11 September - Harry Rose tattoo.

18 September - Harry at Pixie Geldorf’s birthday, with Nick and first time seen with model Daisy Lowe in photo pixie posted.

27 September - 1D sign another contract with Syco for 3 albums, they are each paid £10m.

28 September: On the anniversary of the Begin Again weekend in Paris 28 September- 5 October 2012 Harry tweeted: "We don't need no piece of paper from the city hall". from Australia.

5 October - Harry pulled a blonde out of the crowd and hung out with her that night in Australia

8 October - Harry tweeted Shania Twain is so good. Shania thanks him and invites him to her show in Vegas.

16 October - Harry talked about Shania Twain 'Still the One' on stage, Tweet Q's - what song would you like to listen to now?

17 October Harry cried onstage, (0:55) during over again Taylor seen with Alexander Skarsgard 3 days later

18 October - throws up on stage reports touring taking toll

28 October - Harry talked about Shania Twain 'Still the One' on stage again, What's the most embarrassing song on your ipod.

1 November - 1D, Katy Perry and John Mayer take photos backstage at a Japanese radio station in Tokyo. New Romantics was written about Taylor being sad her ex had gone to Japan with his new GF.

November -j14 article where Harry says ok to get back together with ex. Also reports Taylor is house hunting in London. Rumour Taylor was seen with Douglas booth.

13 November - Taylors first Victoria Secret show where she wears a union jack dress in NY and performed IKYWT. On 14th Harry in UK for Gemma's graduation, TS in NY for billboard awards.

18 November - Courtney Cox said she hung out with each of them at her house in Malibu

20 November - Harry has dinner with Kendall Taylor tweets ""I've listened to "Hold On" by @ColbieCaillat 45 times today. So on repeat. So important." on the 21st when dinner reported.

22 November - midnights memories release party in la with Ryan Seacrest

23 November, both at AMAs, gold dress. Kendall PDA reported but no record of it

25 November - Midnight Memories released with Something Great written with Jacknife Lee who also worked on Red.

3 December - Lover Journal - December 3, 2013, Sydney.

6 December - Harry leaves Kendalls hotel and they have breakfast. Lunch the next day NY. Harry is carrying notebooks and dressed that same as in the Spotify visual for Where Do Broken Hearts Go. Tabloids say not dating Kendall and he is texting Daisy Lowe.

11 December- Taylor ATW speech talks about songwriting like a message in a bottle, she mentions still love you and I’m really heartbroken

12 December - One Direction in Milan, record the Xfactor final interview with cushions on the floor.

13 December - Taylor posts a series of photos to IG about a rose garden party in Melbourne, Australia while on tour for her birthday. Many think 1989 will be called Roses. The captions made a sort of poem "Roses. Red Balloons. Pretty.... Sparklers. The best birthday I've ever had." Which could be a dig at Harry, Roses being common Haylor imagery, his tattoo and she famously said her 2012 birthday was her best ever when he took her to the Lakes. Harry's "better still be my winding wheel" tweet. Harry posts his Cannes photo December 14.

15 December - One Direction performs Midnight Memories on Xfactor UK Final and Harry arrives at Kendalls London hotel at 2am.

17 December - Harry, Ed and Taylor spotted together in Suffolk. Harry got injunction banning paparazzi from outside his home. Harry likely had moved into his current house. First confirmed at Ben Winston's with Morgan Spurlock in April 2012, Harry later told Rolling Stone he stayed there 20 months. He was seen house hunting in July and reports of his house were September 2012.

21 December - midnight memories MV filmed

Continue to 2014

[catscraftsandcommentary]

Okay, so now I have an idea for a new AU, THANKS.

(Or at least, I finally fleshed out the idea where I was like "I want a modern AU just so I can give Livi and Aiden both tons of ridiculous cat lady t-shirts.")

Modern AU. Milena comes from a family that's part political dynasty, part business powerhouse. I'm going to say they deal in luxury textile goods, because Milena's hobby is - instead of embroidery - fabric painting and dyeing. And eventually screenprinting. Basically modern types of decorating fabric.

Don't ask about her childhood tie-dye phase, BTW. It was less a "phase" and more a "decade." Then she discovered batik fabric. And screen printing. And five dozen other techniques.

Marta double-majored in law and business, was the president of her sorority, graduated top of her class, and is a grade A bitch. Their father LOVES her. Marika is more a political activist. She doesn't necessarily like the political game, but she knows how to play it.

Milena just noped straight out of all of that and hides in her little crafting studio, designing new prints to sell for her father's company (ugh) and her secret Etsy store (yay).

She's currently studying textiles at Oxenfurt University (their fine arts program is the best in the world, okay, she is in heaven), when she convinces her parents to let her take a semester abroad at the university in Ard Carraigh. While there, she hears the strangest rumor: apparently, the head of the student body at the rival school (Kaer Morhen University, a weird little place with a Witcher for a mascot, whatever that is) once full-body tackled and threatened to geld the former student body president, who was then expelled in disgrace. And no one can agree why. She possibly lets her curiosity get the better of her and goes to an away game at the infamous KMU, where she's almost immediately accosted by a giant redhead.

"Hey! Fuckin' hippy! Are you LOST?!? Farmers market's five miles the other direction. And they ain't out on game days anyway. Can't get fuckin' parking."

...and that's how Milena meets Lambert. She asks to be shown around campus, and - unused to having a cute girl in a sundress ask him for LITERALLY ANYTHING - Lambert surprises himself by agreeing. They end up meeting some of his friends at a party - the Witcher schools correspond to university departments, which each have their own mascot because reasons.

(I have an entire headcanon for how Geralt got voted student body president - no he did not ask for it at ALL, yes he still ran away into the woods after it happened.)

At some point, Milena starts a THRIVING business printing designs onto shirts, tank tops, dresses, bags, and anything anyone brings her. All her friends end up with lots of custom shirts from her.

At some point, she runs into Jaskier and mentions KMU and all the many, wonderfully attractive co-eds there. He, of course, begs to go along on her next trip to visit her boyfriend...and shows up wearing the most provocative shirt she's seen him in yet.

("FREE LOVE...and orgasms")

He takes one look at Geralt and goes "I want to climb you LIKE A TREE."

As Geralt is turning bright red, Lambert asks "does he know Geralt's a forestry major?"

"Shh," Milena chides.

"Are you really hitting on my boyfriend in front of me?" Eskel asks.

Jaskier looks between Geralt and Eskel, wonder dawning on his face. "Two for one special?"

Aiden magically appears with popcorn. (Appearing out of nowhere with a snack just in time to watch something hilarious is his GIFT, okay? No one knows how he does it, but it's his thing. Also being hella snarky.) "I'd watch it."

Just saw an ad for what may be THE most Jaskier shirt ever:

a racerback tank saying "the only reason I'd kick you out of bed is to FUCK YOU...on the floor"

Geralt nearly swallowed his tongue the first time he saw Jaskier wearing it. Eskel chuckled and asked if that was an offer.

[realtalk-princeton]

girl here, how do I become friends with more guys? a lot of my friends from home were guys actually, but I feel like since I got to Princeton almost all (except for a couple) of my friends have been girls

Response from Ocean:

I would love to answer this with, "The same way you make friends with girls!" but I know from experience that the gender aspect does influence the way you make friends. I'm in the opposite position, I was friends mostly with girls in high school and now my friend group is mostly guys and/or genderqueer people.

[Disclaimer: I myself am nonbinary and go by they/them pronouns. My answer may appear gender reductive, and I know that each gender has an entire spectrum of behavior and no one can be reduced to just their gender, etc etc.]

I've noticed, especially in cishet culture, that guys and girls tend to group together and socialize in different ways. With girl friends, I found that we could often just sit and talk for hours and that would be a "hangout". However, in my experience, guys talk to each other less and often when they hang out they are doing some sort of activity. You can meet guys in a lot of the same places as you meet girls: class, eating clubs, clubs, or co-ed sports teams. However, it can be difficult to ask them to hang out, because can be interpreted as asking them out on a date if it's one on one.

My first tip would be to try and arrange some group hangouts. Encourage your girl and guy friends to bring friends you haven't met yet so that you can expand your social circle. If you meet a guy you'd like to be friends with, invite him to some group hangouts and over time you'll be able to hang out one on one without it being awkward. If you like going to parties, pregames are a good way to invite a lot of people to a group hangout. Otherwise: study hangout, group boba run, group movie or event outing, etc.

If you're not in many clubs, I'd encourage you to check out some of them. They're always having events, and not all clubs will make you apply/bicker/audition. Don't be afraid to go alone if you can't convince a friend to come along. It can also be fun to go to some lectures or discussions that relate to your interests (really!) and meet people there. The best part is you already have a topic of discussion!

And an overall tip for making friends for me is to try and move away from the small talk as quickly as possible. You know what I mean, the typical Princeton conversation of name-major-courses-etc. Try and think of a funny or weird question that provokes discussion and it will be less impersonal. Eventually you will learn their major and what classes they take, you don't necessarily need to ask that as a first question. Or, ask them a personal question that relates to their interests, not just, "Oh, how do you like that?"

Good luck making friends!

[yszarin]

things Edward Keystone has done:

healed a snow leopard that was trying to kill his party because it wasn’t evil and he didn’t want it to die

fussed over Tjelvar’s minimal cold damage when he himself was 21 hit points down (“in dying territory”) and leaving a blood trail - did not think to heal himself until Tjelvar tried to give him a healing potion

declared Tjelvar a genius

completely failed to notice Bertie trying to sleep with him and warned him against being a wrong ‘un 

things Edward Keystone deserves:

not fucking this