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theokotrain · 4 years ago

Text

Vestige - Interlude: The Party

Wattpad Version

As the night fills the sky

All my fears are dissipating

'Cause I feel reassured

That I might make it through

And if all my luck should burn

Then I guess it burned for you

---

April 13th, 2012

I was sitting on my bed, back against the bed frame with my knees raised in front of me, holding up my laptop. I had been spending the last few hours writing an essay for my English class, specifically answering the topic question my teacher had given everybody: "How do our past experiences influence our decisions?". The question was simple enough, it's a pretty universally recognized idea that stuff that happens to us has an effect on our decision making. I mean, that's what it means to grow, right? You gain more knowledge as you live through life and form new memories, and that helps you make more informed decisions in the future.

I've never really been too good at writing anything analytical, especially non-fiction. Essays and research papers that required informed arguments that helped to prove your point? Those were an entirely unknown game to me, one which I had never managed to breeze through. Of course, we were supposed to use some of the books we've read this year as evidence for our arguments, so that at least made it a bit easier, even if most of the books were ones from nearly five decades ago and definitely out of touch at this point. The sound of my laptop's keys clicking as I typed away were the only sounds I could pick up in the room. I had my earphones in for a bit, but those always hurt my ears after a while, so I had taken them out.

Looking at the time in the corner of my laptop screen, it was 4:43 PM. I started writing as soon as I got home from class, so I've only been going for about an hour. Unfortunately, this essay is a non-insignificant amount of my course grade, so I needed to finish this as soon as possible.

God, it's a Friday! I could be out doing something actually fun with Shae and the other guys. Isn't that the whole point of high school? That's what it always seemed like in movies, at least, but I guess I've been a victim of false advertising.

After a bit more time passes, the sound of my phone ringing from my desk brings me out of my writing trance. I sigh, setting my laptop next to me on the bed, not wanting to get out of bed, but eventually forcing myself into maneuvering over to the desk, I grab the phone and flip it open, looking to see the Caller ID.

Shaela.

I instantly accept the call, it's almost second nature at this point. She calls me at least once a day so she can tell me about whatever person is pissing her off that day, or whatever drama she's heard from her other friends. I was never really one for gossip, or whatever, but I did appreciate talking to her.

I put the phone up to my ear, "What's up?" I say, a tinge of fatigue in my voice.

"Hey! Just warning you that I'm like five minutes from your place and you don't have a say in the matter." She replied bluntly. I can hear the sound of cars driving by on the other side of the phone, so she's obviously outside, confirming her words.

I take a deep breath before speaking, "...Why?" I said with exasperated sarcasm.

"Because! I have something to tell you, and if I say it over the phone then I seriously doubt it'll work out in the way I'm hoping it does."

"That clears up nothing, actually, and now I regret picking up."

"Even if you didn't answer, that doesn't stop your parents from letting their son's lovely goody-two-shoes of a friend stop by for a visit!" She exclaimed, a mischievous tone subtly layered in her voice.

She's not wrong.

"Wow, you make this sound like you're sneaking into a high-security building or something." I say, utterly confused at her motives. "Obviously you can come over, but I'm not exactly filled with confidence at whatever you're planning."

"Like I said, I can't tell you yet, but it's gonna be awesome!" She said. There was an unusual perkiness to her that made itself pretty clear over the phone.

Before I can say anything, I'm met with the dial tone, signalling that she had hung up. The only thing I can do at this point is wait for her to get here, I guess. She always lets herself in when she comes over, so I don't make the effort to meet her downstairs. A sudden ping sound fills the quiet room, seeming to come from my laptop. I get back into bed, looking to see where the notification came from.

It's a message from Tyler.

He's definitely the newest member of our little group, if even that. I'm the only person in the group that he's actually friends with so far, despite my efforts to bring him along on any plans we all make. I only met the Grey Wolf back in February, at the beginning of the second semester, in the school's photography class. Nobody I knew signed up for it, and due to our prestigious high school's advanced budget for technology, we were forced to be paired up for shared computer use in the Photography Room. I suppose Tyler was also fortunate enough to not know anybody in the class, as we ended up being paired together by the teacher. He was definitely someone I could only describe as uninterested, as the first week or two I spent with him in that class consisted of him either giving me one word answers or answering in the most blunt, bored tone he could manage. Though, it seemed that it took a bit of persistence on my part to push him to be more open, and since then he's grown to be a pretty great friend.

Tyler: u goin to that party tonight ive been hearin about?

Party? I wasn't made aware of anything like that, at least... not yet. Something in the back of my brain was telling me that Shae had ulterior motives about coming to my place so suddenly, but I'm still hoping that I'm wrong. I hate parties.

Jake: party? havent heard anything, are u going?

Tyler: thinkin about it

think its gonna be over at chris's place, guess his parents r gone for the weekend or somethin

Jake: chrisssss? ughh that guy is such an asshole

Tyler: yeah u dont havee to go, but itd prob be more fun to have someone u actually know there

The way he worded that was directed at me, but I could tell he didn't want to go on his own.

Jake: i guess ill think about it

Tyler: sickk, call me if u make up ur mind

Before I can type my farewells over IM, Shaela energetically bursts through the door.

"Jesus! You scared the shit outta me, don't you knock?" I said, mildly exasperated.

"Oh come on, I literally called you a few minutes ago, you had plenty of time to not make a situation where it'd be a bad idea for me to barge in," She replies, laughing, before setting her bag on the ground and dramatically falling into my bed. "Today was garbage."

"What happened?"

"Ugh, Claire decided to just not show up, I guess, on the day we're supposed to present that stupid History project? And, obviously, she didn't give me her part of the project or anything, so I had tell Mr Thomas about the situation, which was fucking embarrassing." She paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. "Luckily, he said he wouldn't reduce my grade for handing it in late, since I actually had my part finished. God, what a bitch- I must've called her like thirty times before class to get her to email me her part, and every time it went straight to voicemail - and she told me last night that she'd have it ready for today!"

"Have you gotten a hold of her yet?" I asked, closing my laptop and setting it beside me.

Shae turns her head to me, shaking her head, "Nope, she's been ghosting me all day."

"Sounds like typical Claire."

"Yeah, I shouldn't have partnered with her, but apparently I can't say no to anyone, so..." I chuckle lightly in response. "Anyways! I didn't just come here to complain to you!" She says, sitting up on the bed, now facing towards me.

"Right... So what was so important that you just had to tell me in person?" I say, sarcastically.

"Like I said, if I asked you over the phone you would've definitely said no, and my ability to pressure you into doing things isn't as effective unless it's in person!" She responded.

I subtly rolled my eyes, but it's clear she noticed from the stare-down she gave me, "Okay, so what is it?"

"Soooooo..." She says, trying to find the rest of the words, "There's a party."

Wow.

"Wh- did everybody know about that party except for me?!?" I exclaimed.

Shaela's face quickly turns to an expression of shock, "Who told you?"

"Tyler did, like, not even five minutes ago." I say, bluntly.

"What? How does he know Chris?"

"Friend-of-a-friend, I'm guessing?"

"Hmm..." She hummed, thinking about something, "So, did you tell him you were going?"

"I specifically said I'd think about it, nothing definite." I made it clear in my tone that I wasn't particularly interested.

"Oh, come on, dude! It'll be fun!"

I didn't really have an interest in going, but I know it'd make Shae happy, plus it'd be nice to hang out with Tyler again even if we've only known each other for a couple months.

"...Fine. But, if Chris or any of his buddies start shit, I'm leaving."

"Awesome!"

"Lemme just call Tyler and let him know," I said as I grabbed my phone and flipped it open, finding Tyler in my contact list and dialling.

"You gonna bring him with-" The phone rings a few times before he picks up and I extend my hand out towards Shae in a shushing motion. She rolls her eyes, smirking.

"Hey? So are ya gonna go?" He said eagerly.

"Well, Shae showed up at my door literally right after you messaged me, asking the same thing!" I exclaimed in a fake-preppy voice. "So, I guess I have no choice since she'll probably just drag me there if I say no," I joked. She nods her head toward me in response.

"Oh, is she going too?" He inquired.

"Yeah, I guess so! Your place is kinda on the way to Chris', so we could probably meet you at your place and go from there."

"Yeah! Sounds good!" He quickly responded.

I laughed, "Okay, we'll call you when we get there?"

"Sure thing!"

We exchanged our farewells, and hung up. The party wasn't for at least another hour or two, so Shae and I had some time to burn, of which I was entirely out of ideas. I figured I could at least spend this time actually being productive, so I grabbed my laptop and continued on writing my English essay as Shae resumed her previous conversation topic of stuff at school that was pissing her off. It was pretty entertaining, to be fair. She was telling me about how Chris had gotten in a fight with this other kid in our grade yesterday after class, which I wasn't lucky enough to witness, but it was obviously all anyone would talk about for basically the entire day today so word spread around fast. The part I hadn't heard about was that both Chris and the other guy, Nathan, got suspended for a week because of it. Chris was generally an asshole to everybody, including myself, so I didn't feel too bad about that. Although, I didn't know Nathan all that well. Other than having a few classes together, I don't think I've ever held an actual conversation with the guy. I think it was safe to assume that Chris was the one who started it, and Shae seemed to agree with me, even though she hadn't seen the fight either.

"But, apparently Nathan's gonna show up tonight!" She exclaimed coyly.

"...Remind me again why you want me to go to this specific party?"

"You'll have a great time! It's not like we'll be involved in the drama anyway so think of it more as entertainment!"

"I think you and I have different definitions of the word 'entertainment'," I joked.

"I'm sure you can go run off somewhere with Tyler if you're not having fun," She said, her tone reminding me of my mom.

"Oh yeah? What about you?"

"I can't just leave Alex at a party with Chris, those two start shit between each other so much and I'd rather not deal with the aftermath of that today."

"I'm guessing it's safe to assume that Elliot's going too, then?"

"He's not big on parties, but he'll usually go if everyone else is, unlike somebody," She says, gesturing towards me.

"Good one," I reply, unmoving as I keep typing away at my assignment.

"Well, we should probably leave soon since we're stopping at Tyler's place on the way.

I saved the document I had been working on, closing my laptop. "Sounds good to me!"

---

"I can't believe you actually agreed to go." Tyler joked as we walked towards the road from his house.

"Yeah, me either." I replied. I definitely didn't put in any effort in dressing up for the party, opting for a snug space-themed graphic tee, along with black jeans and a white zip-up hoodie. Shae and Tyler both stand on opposite sides of me as we walk down the sidewalk.

"Luckily I learned the subtle techniques in convincing you to do things against your better judgement, so now you get to have fun for once!" Shae exclaimed.

"It's not my fault that going to a party is literally the last thing on earth I'd do for fun in any normal situation." I retorted, putting my hands in the pockets of my jacket.

"Oh yeah? And what do you consider a 'normal situation'?" Shae asks.

"Any situation where you guys aren't the ones trying to get me to go! I'm only doing this for you two, y'know." I said, looking over at both of them.

"What about Elliot and Alex?" Tyler chimed in.

"They aren't the ones asking me to go to this party." I sarcastically remarked, trying to keep the conversation light-hearted. "Speaking of the party- this is Chris we're talking about, there's gonna be beer, right?"

"Uh, duh?" Shae replied.

"Yeah, that's a definite no for me, I'm already enough of a disappointment to my parents,"

"No one's making you drink, Jake. At least you'd be safe if some old hag called the cops about the noise." Shae said.

"I think at that point we're guilty by association, so we'd just make a run for it if that happens," Tyler joked.

"Dude, the chance of me outrunning a police officer successfully is about as likely as me not wanting to punch Chris tonight."

"And the chance of you winning that fight is just as low!" Shae retorted, Tyler laughing in response.

"I specifically said 'want' because of that very reason!"

"Wow, I'd pay money to see you fight that guy." Tyler said, nudging his elbow into my side.

It isn't a secret that I'm not exactly athletic. I mean, I'm definitely not weak, but fighting basically any animal of a similar size to mine was not a situation that favoured my victory.

"That sounds more like just getting the shit kicked outta me for your entertainment." I remarked, lightly punching Tyler's shoulder in return.

"Absolutely worth every penny!" Shae exclaimed. Luckily, the place wasn't any more than ten minutes away from Tyler's place, so I didn't have to endure listening to these two talk about me getting beat up for much longer.

We finally make it to Chris' house, and I'm suddenly filled with an impending sense of regret. Obviously, my parents would never in a million years agree to me going to a party like this. As far as they know, I'm just spending the evening hanging out with Shae at Tyler's house. So yeah, this entire night had a lot of potential for disaster.

Shae can clearly see my hesitation, because she grabs my hand, leading me up the walkway, Tyler following closely behind.

"I wonder if Elliot and Alex beat us here?" She says, knocking on the front door.

"I doubt they had anything to do earlier, hell they probably came straight here after school, knowing Alex." I said, laughing.

Our conversation is cut short by the opening door, revealing the familiar black cat.

"Oh, look, the Stephenson kid brought his girlfriend!" Chris exclaimed mockingly, looking back into the house, before peering around my shoulder, "And... Tyler?" He said, inquisitively.

I lean over, blocking Tyler from his line of sight, "Yeah, hey, not dating by the way!" I said. I've known Shae since I first moved to Vestige, around the time I turned five years old, so it wasn't uncommon for rumours to go around that we were dating. I've always thought of her more as a sister, if anything.

"I asked them to come!" Tyler said. That was only partly true, but according to Tyler, they've been 'somewhat-friends' for quite a while now, so saying that would at least mean less mild-harassment from Chris for tonight.

"Oh, uh, okay... come on in! But you're on the hook for any shit they pull, Tyler!" He said, opening the door wider.

---

The party had been going on for a few hours at this point. I could recognize most of the animals here from school, but not enough to actually hold a conversation with any of them, so most of my time here had just been spent with Shae and Tyler. The place hasn't been incredibly crowded luckily, but there were easily about forty others in this part of the house alone. I'm assuming only high school grades were invited, but there were a considerable number of students to meet that requirement. The issue at hand for me, other than how crowded this place is, is that both Shae and Tyler ditched me to go... somewhere? I think Shae saw some of her friends and went somewhere with them, but Tyler was pretty secretive about where he was going, only telling me that he'd be back in a bit. So I've been standing here in this random corner of the house with a drink in hand, trying to make myself look busy and not awkward, which is exactly why I didn't want to go to this party in the first place!

"Jake!" A voice shouted from a ways away.

I turn my head in confusion, revealing Alex, walking towards me from across the room.

"Oh, Alex! Hey! What's up dude!" I finish the last bit of my soda, waving at him. Because this was Chris' party, there was obviously beer too, but I didn't feel like coming home drunk and my parents finding out.

"I didn't think you'd wanna come to something like this! Feeling the regret yet?"

"I like parties! It's the times like these when I'm standing in a corner by myself with nothing to do that I hate, which seems to happen every time I go to a party!" I exclaimed, pausing for a moment. "Okay, maybe I do hate parties- I've had to explain this so many times today I'm about ready to jump into Lake Ambuscade."

' "Wow, sounds like somebody needs to socialize instead of stewing in a corner for the rest of the night!"

"Socialize? Really? I know just about everybody here and just about none of them are worth talking-"

"Hang with me and Elliot, then? Justin set up some racing games in the other room, we were gonna join, but we could use a fourth... You in?" He said, his tone obviously trying to sound coercing.

"God, please, anything to get me out of this corner for the next three hours." I said, Alex returning my words with a laugh.

"Well, come on then! We'll have to hurry if we want to get one of the good controllers!" He exclaimed, motioning to follow him.

As we move through the various cliques, I recognize a few faces here and there, though not enough to actually want to talk to them. There's been music playing since we got here, and I have yet to recognize a single song, they all seem to be some form of drone-y bass-heavy music that I can't say I've heard in any normal situations. I'm doing my best to follow Alex, although he keeps weaving between the other animals faster than I can keep up, resulting in me having to shove past everyone near me in an effort to speed myself up. Luckily, it seems that no one notices me anyway.

When we arrive in the other room, it seems to just be another living room, but decorated with a galore of punk band posters, shelves holding more DVD cases than I would ever care to count, and even a mini-fridge. Maybe Chris is the type to have a 'man cave' or something? Just hearing that phrase almost makes me want to vomit, but there aren't any more accurate words that come to mind. The room isn't massive or anything, but the TV resting upon the wall across the room seems to challenge that idea, looking almost eighty inches in size. Luckily no randoms from the party were in here, sitting about ten feet away from the TV is Elliot, leaning back in a purple bean bag chair that seems almost three times bigger than him, and Justin, the cougar I'd only known slightly through Alex, laying down sideways on the couch directly in front of the gigantic screen.

"Whatttt! You took the bean bag chair? Lameee..." Alex whined.

"You're the one who wanted to go get Jake, you snooze you lose!" Elliot retorted, looking oddly proud of himself.

"Damn, wish I had a room like this at my house..." I mumbled, looking around the room.

"Are we gonna play or what?" Justin said, cutting through the momentary silence.

"Duh!" Alex claimed.

Justin sits up, taking the spot on the couch closest to Elliot. I opt for the leftmost seat, and Alex sits in-between the both of us. Elliot grabs the other three controllers and tosses them over at us, one by one. Luckily, there weren't any garbage third-party controllers, so at least none of us would have to deal with that. I will admit, it did feel kinda weird going to someone's party just to play games away from everybody, but I would be lying if I said I didn't prefer that, even though I rarely play games, if ever.

After Justin turns the console on, he goes through the menus, launching the game. I can't say I recognize the title, but it seems to be a pretty standard racing game. He goes into the custom mode, opting for a four-player split-screen match, choosing 'R1' as the category of cars to race in. As everyone chooses their cars, I scroll through the list, not really knowing what to pick. I've never been good with car stuff, so I pick an 'Aston Martin Lola' just based on the number-rating system the game ranks the cars with.

"You guys ready?" Justin asks.

"Oh yeah, get ready to eat my dust you guys!" Elliot exclaims, challengingly.

"Oddly prideful words for someone about to lose!" Alex replies, laughing.

The countdown begins, as the cameras slowly show the view of each car as it moves to the rear. When it starts, I somehow manage the fuckup of spinning my tires out, leaving me a few seconds behind the others as the car swerves back and forth. I curse under my breath as I try to regain control of the car, and swiftly pick up speed. The track seems like nothing I haven't seen before, a typical professional track, with rows and rows of audience seating to the side. Unfortunately, I'm now in last place. The next few moments of the track are a few quick corners, allowing me the chance to catch up, at least a little.

Unexpectedly, the track turns off of the main road, going into a forested area. The road is considerably more narrow at this point, so it takes a conscious effort to not drive into the trees by the asphalt. It looks like the road stretches on forever, as I still can't make out any upcoming turns. I guess the car I chose for the race had a better top speed than Justin's, as I'm quickly catching up to him, moving into third place. I'm gripping my controller to an uncomfortable degree, but I can't seem to relax the tension as I try to make my way into second place. I don't think I can pick up any more speed in this car, so me moving up is reliant on the road staying straight for just a bit longer. After what feels like a lifetime, the front of my car finally starts making it past Elliot's, then the midsection, and finally, I'm in second. The sound of all four car engines is drowning out any remnants of the video game music, and I feel the sudden urge to curse out whoever turned the TV volume up this high. My eyes are focused entirely on Alex's car as I make my final push into first place. If I were actually driving this fast in the real world, I'd be scared out of my fucking mind. Out of nowhere, Alex, and the others, begins to slow down considerably.

Oh fuck.

It's at that point I notice that there is a sharp right turn rapidly approaching. I've been pushing the top-speed of this car since the beginning of this stretch of road, and now I'm going too quickly to stop in time. What's the button to use the handbrake, again? I figure that the only way for me to not fuck up this race for myself is to try to drift around the corner. Considering I've never played this game before, it's going to prove to be a challenge. But, it's either that, or just ending up in dead-last again.

I hold down the A button, and pull the joystick as far to the right as possible. Suddenly, all I can hear from the game is the loud skidding sounds of my tires against the asphalt. To my surprise, I cut the corner a bit early, now going over the grass. I try to do a bit of directional-corrections and start heading back onto the track. Going over the grass definitely slowed me down a fair bit, but it definitely was a significantly better outcome over just crashing into the wall. And, to my surprise, the corner of my screen reads... first?!?

"How the fuck...?" Alex questions, seemingly in disbelief.

"I wish I could tell you." I replied, eyes wide at whatever the fuck just happened.

The distance I managed to gain on Alex isn't by a whole lot, but there's only about a quarter of the track left before we reach the finish line, so I have a chance at winning this. The track hurriedly changes from the forest as it reenters the main track. The long, straight roads seem to end as the road becomes a slow series of sharp turns, never giving me the opportunity to get back up to speed. It seems like the high top speed was my only advantage, because at every corner we take, I turn my camera around, revealing the other cars inching closer and closer to me.

I can see the finish line on the mini-map, just a few more turns away. I know that I'm not gonna be able to distance myself from Alex and the others at this point, so my only feasible strategy is to keep moving, cutting the corners as fast as I can, and getting to the finish line before they can pass me. Unfortunately, Alex's car seems to be getting too close for comfort now, meaning I might have to take some risks to ensure I can stay in first. As we approach the final turn, leading into the finish line, I realise I'm gonna have to try to drift this corner. I can feel my pointer finger practically cracking the plastic on the controller from the amount of pressure I'm putting on the right trigger. In a final plea to win, I push down on the A button, pulling the handbrake. The car starts to smoothly skid around the corner. Luckily, there are barriers on the sides of the road this time, preventing me from sliding onto the grass. To my surprise, the drift seems to work better than expected. That is, until, like the fucking idiot I am, make a slight overcorrection towards the left barriers as I exit the drift. I managed to avoid driving directly into the wall, but it did slow me down a bit.

Alex is immediately behind me, and I put all of my strength into accelerating towards the finish line. I'd be fucked if I broke the controller, cause I can't really afford the fifty dollars to buy a new one, but winning this race is more important to me at the moment. The finish line is only about five-hundred metres away, and Alex is slowly beginning to pass. All I can do at this point is push the gas as much as I can, and pray that I can cross the finish line before he can get back into first place. The finish line gets closer and closer, and it seems like it's gonna be too close for me to accurately tell the winner. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest from how stressful this fucking game has been, and now, we're about to find out whose efforts paid off. As each car makes its way over the finish line, each of our dedicated sections of the screen turns to slow motion. When it's finally over, the text fades in on each screen, revealing our place...

...

...Second?!?

"FUCK!" I shouted, realising I had been holding my breath since the final stretch of the race.

"HA! Dude, you suck!" Alex exclaimed, playfully shoving me.

"I think that was the most effort I've put into anything in my life." I said, setting my controller on the coffee table in front of me.

"Wow, that's dramatic," Justin remarked.

"Yeah, that's the usual for Jake," Elliot replied, laughing.

"You probably woulda won if you picked a better car, dude. That track was way too close-quarters so you should've gone with a car with better acceleration." Alex said.

"Wha- do you own this game?" I questioned, looking accusatory.

"...Yeah? It came out a few months ago, pretty popular right now." He replied.

"Ugh, this is what I get for playing with a bunch of gamers." I exclaimed, applying a disgusted tone to the last word.

"Not my fault you only play like one game a month!" Alex joked.

"Even then, I was like this close to beating you anyway!" I said, gesturing a minuscule distance between my thumb and pointer finger.

A voice interrupts our argument, coming from right outside the room, "Uh huh...

...

Really? That's bullshit! Come on...

...

Dude, give me a couple of days, I'll make it right!

...

Yeah, I swear."

It seems that we all stopped talking to listen in at the same time. "That sounds like Tyler... who's he arguing with?" Elliot asked. I can't make out the voice of whoever he's talking to, it just sounds like mumbling.

They seem to pause for a moment, and the sound of a single set of footsteps can be heard.

"Fuck..." Tyler says to himself, still out of view.

"...I should probably see what's up, you guys can keep playing without me." I say, getting up from my spot on the couch.

"Yeah, you do that! Less competition for me," Alex exclaims, laughing to himself.

"Hey, I can still beat your ass at this game, I know exactly which car to pick this time!" Elliot argued.

"Yeah, right! Guess we'll find out!"

I leave as the three start up another game, kind of glad I don't have to have another near-heart attack from playing again. When I get back into the dimly-lit hallway, Tyler is nowhere to be seen.

I look around, heading into the main room of the house to see if I can spot him. It's pretty difficult to see anything, because of how dim it is here, plus the sheer amount of animals crowding up the place. Despite that, I manage to spot the Grey Wolf a ways away, hurrying quickly into the bathroom.

As I shove my way through a few groups of teens, I almost fall over a few times, gaining confused stares from a few in the room. I lightly knock on the bathroom door, waiting for a response, "Hey, you okay Tyler?" After a few moments, I'm returned with no answer, "...Tyler-" Before I can finish my sentence, Tyler swiftly pulls open the bathroom door, pulling me in and shutting the door behind me, before sitting down on the side of the bathtub. As I'm about to say something, I hear the sound of him sniffling.

...Is he crying?

He's looking towards the floor, so I can't confirm it visually, but the sound definitely gives it away.

"Whoa, what's wrong? Did something happen?" I asked worriedly, not yet choosing to bring up the argument we overheard.

There's a few seconds of silence as he tries to bring himself together, not very successfully. "I- I... I don't- I don't think I can-"

"It's fine, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to," I tried to reassure him. He raises his head for a moment to look at me, trying to find words to say, instead opting to go back to crying, head in his hands. I've never been good with situations like this, so I sit down next to him, putting my hand on his upper back, softly patting.

"I'm sorry- I'm a fucking idiot. I shouldn't have asked you to come."

"Hey! I've been having fun! Don't worry about me, it seems like you're the one who shouldn't have come." I joke, in some effort to lighten the mood.

Shit, was that inconsiderate of me to say?

To my surprise, he manages to let out a light laugh, "Yeah, I'm starting to realise that."

"...Do you wanna leave, then? They know I didn't want to go here in the first place, so you could just say you're being nice and walking me home." I didn't know if he would actually take up that offer, but I know some guys have a weird thing about not wanting to seem 'uncool' and leaving a party early was definitely considered that.

He thinks for a moment, still sniffling pretty noticeably. "...okay, just- give me a minute, I don't want to go out there looking like this." He mumbles, looking towards the door.

"Yeah, that's fine." I said, continuing to rub around his neck area.

This definitely wasn't how I expected the night to go. But it was a sort of 'two-birds-with-one-stone' kind of situation. I get to help out Tyler, which is usually the other way around, I get to leave early, and hopefully Shae stops bugging me about going to parties, at least for a while.

Now that I think about it, that analogy is pretty messed up.

A few silent minutes go by as I sit next to the still-crying Tyler, waiting for him to recollect himself. Even though he hasn't actually said anything here, in the two months I've known him, this is probably the most vulnerable I've ever seen him. When I first met him, it was pretty accurate to describe him as the kind of guy who acts like he never feels emotion. Hell, even I refuse to be open about my feelings, but most of my friends see through that nowadays. Even now, I don't really understand why I do that. I guess it's just easier to not talk about shit like that? Is that why Tyler does it?

"I think I'm good now," He said, shaking his hands as he stood up.

"Okay, let's get out of this dumpster fire." I sarcastically remarked. Tyler shot me a confused look in return. "Whatever, let's just go."

I open the bathroom door, grabbing his arm as I lead him out into the main room. Almost immediately the voice of a certain black cat perks up behind us.

"Oh? And what did you two get up to in there?" Chris remarked, laughing, "I didn't know you guys were THAT kind of friends!"

God damnit. This stupid fucking feline.

"Yeah, it's too loud out here for me, I needed a break, he came with." I explained, Tyler standing closely behind me with a confused look on his face. Just roll with it, dude, I think to myself, knowing I probably shouldn't say that out loud.

"You know, I would believe that, but normal guys actually just go outside when they need a break." He replied.

"Well, hey! That's where we're going right now, so it all checks out!" I say in the bitchiest voice I can muster.

"Heh, sure thing, Jake." He said, sounding weirdly satisfied with himself. I didn't want to spend any more time in this fucking house than I needed to, especially while talking to Chris, so I continue on, pulling Tyler by the hand towards the exit. After a few moments, we make it to the front door. I promptly open it and we both head outside.

We're immediately greeted by the light of the moon and the starry sky as we head down the walkway toward the street. One of the few benefits of living in such a backwater town was the absence of any significant light pollution. I've been to Portland a few times for school field trips and such, and seeing the sheer difference in visible stars was absolutely staggering. I could only imagine what it would be like to go stargazing in the middle of nowhere.

"At least it's a nice night out." I said.

"Yeah..." Tyler replied, his mind clearly in a completely different place.

"I should probably tell Shae where we went, so she doesn't freak out trying to find us back there." I joked, pulling out my cell phone. Texting on my flip phone was an arduous task, but I didn't want to call her, so I had not much of a choice.

I send the text, and close my phone, returning it to my pocket. As we walk down the road, we stew in the silence, the only auditory sounds coming from the party still close by, and the local crickets chirping.

I won't lie, as much as I usually appreciate quiet, this is the loudest silence I've ever been stuck in. It goes on for more than five minutes. I could tell he wanted to say something, and I was eager to find out whatever was going on that started this in the first place. But, like the coward I am, I try to lighten the mood.

"Hopefully that satisfied your quota of me going to parties with you for a while, cause I do not plan on having the energy for something like that again for at least a few months." I said, awkwardly laughing. He doesn't respond, at least for a while, as he raises his hand, scratching the back of his neck nervously. "...Uhh, are you sure you don't wanna talk about it? I mean-"

"Can I tell you something?" He interrupted, his voice still cracking like it was in the bathroom.

"...Sure?" I replied, slightly confused.

"It's just that- I don't really know- like what-"

"-to say? Just think for a minute. No rush." That's what my dad always says whenever my mind spirals. I used to be really anxious, although I've been getting better at controlling my thoughts in the past few years.

When I went to text Shae a few minutes ago, my phone's clock read 9:48 PM. I'm supposed to be home at ten and we're still at least twenty minutes away, not even including the detour we'll take to get to Tyler's place. Which brings me to the realisation that, when we get to his house, I'm gonna have to walk the rest of the way home by myself, in the dark. If I get murdered by some serial killer this late at night I'm gonna fucking haunt Shae from the afterlife-

"I think I'm gay," He quickly says, his voice holding a noticeable increase in energy compared to what I've been used to tonight.

Well... can't say that's exactly what I was expecting. Was I expecting anything in particular? I honestly don't know anymore. His words took me by surprise, my brain is kind of scrambled right now. I look over at him - he's looking back at me, probably trying to gauge my reaction. I did my best to conceal any facial reaction, but it's pretty clear that my lack of a response is starting to become noticeable.

"...You... think?"

"Well, like- I don't know. I guess I've just been thinking for a while, and it makes sense... all things considered." He replied anxiously.

"That- That's great! Does anyone else know?"

"I only really realised a few weeks ago, so... no. But compared to anyone else, I probably trust you the most to not like- tell anyone?" He said, looking over at me again.

"Well, I appreciate the completely undeserved confidence you have in me," I joked, realising too late that now probably isn't the time for that, "Yeah, I promise I won't tell anyone."

"Thank you," He replies, a genuine smile strewn across his face.

A few minutes go by as we walk down the road, absorbing the positive energy we created. Having only known Tyler for a little over two months, it definitely surprised me knowing that he trusted me more than anyone else to keep a secret like that... I mean, despite the short amount of time since I met him, I'm as close to him as I've been to Shaela for the past eight years. Maybe even closer? I barely even tell Shae about my actual problems, at least the non-surface level stuff. So yeah, I guess it makes sense that he would trust me with something so important, I know I would absolutely trust him if it were me in that situation.

"...So, do you think you're gonna tell your dad?"

He didn't say anything for a moment as he stared down at the ground beneath him, "I'll probably have to tell him soon, if he has to find out from some asshole that isn't me it'd make it ten times more difficult than if I just said it myself."

I agreed, and we let the conversation cut itself off as we finally approached Tyler's house. I followed him up the walkway and stood on the patio, making sure he actually got inside. He tries the doorknob eagerly, to no avail. Realising that it was locked, he reaches into his pocket for his key - again, to no avail.

"You've gotta be fucking kidding me," Tyler mumbled under his breath, clearly done with tonight. All of the lights were off in the house, signalling that his dad was not awake.

"Maybe you'll wake him up if you knock? Then he can let you in."

"Nonono, he thinks I'm staying at your place! If he finds out I went to a party I'm in deep shit," He whispered.

Of course. If I had to lie to my parents, why would I expect anything different from anyone else?

"Okay, uhh... maybe we can make that lie... not a lie?" I said, sounding weirder than I'd like.

Tyler looked at me, confused for a moment, eyes widening as he realised what I meant, "I can't let you do that, I've already forced you through too much shit tonight."

"Oh, come on, of course you can sleep at my place for the night! My parents think I'm at your house right now, so I can just tell them that we both went over there early in the morning. They love you anyway, so it won't be a problem!"

He didn't move at all, still looking reluctant, "Are you sure it won't be... weird? I don't want to put you in an awkward situation cause of w- what I told you."

"Dude, that couch in my room has a hide-a-bed if you don't want to share mine. Either way, we're friends, aren't we? I trust you."

After a few moments of silence, he speaks up, "...I guess so-"

"Great, then it's settled!" I said, putting my arm around his shoulder as I led him back down the walkway.

---

Once we make it to my place, walk up the creaky wooden steps of my patio as I fish the house key out of my pocket. Tyler's standing closely behind me, looking awkward as ever, clearly not knowing what to do with his hands as he switches between putting them in his pockets and clasping them together.

I turn the key on the lock and try the door, noticing that It's completely pitch black inside the house. My parents usually go to bed at 10 PM, and it was well past that at this point. I lock the door behind us as I reach for my pocket, grabbing my phone and flipping it open to use as a barely-useful flashlight. I take Tyler's wrist as I lead him through the furniture of my living room and up the stairs. The only sounds in the house come from the soft ticking of a clock in the kitchen, the sound of which has always freaked me out whenever I'd come downstairs at three in the morning. Despite my best efforts to be as quiet as possible, the old wooden boards of the stairs prove my effort to be futile as they creak with every step. I can only hope that both of my parents have fallen asleep by now, or else they'd definitely have heard us. As I take Tyler down the hallway, walls strung with various family photos and art fit for a motel, I hear no sounds coming from the master bedroom, relaxing some of my tension.

Once we make it to my room, I breathe a sigh of relief as I turn on the overhead light, hoping my mom doesn't find out and try to lecture me in the morning, "Okay, hide-a-bed or mine, your choice!"

"Hide-a-bed." He replies.

"Sure thing, lemme show you how to set it up," I say as I remove each couch cushion one by one. The couch is sitting directly under my massive bedroom window, illuminated by the glow of the moon. Under the cushions is a black folded-up contraption, bearing a metal handle. I grab the handle and start pulling the bed out from the couch. As the first section of the bed comes out, Tyler stands next to me and helps unfold the second section, and finally the third.

I move over to open the closet door, "I have some spare pillows and blankets in here."

"So, why do you have a spare bed... thingy... in your room anyway?" He asked.

"My cousins' family came to visit from the other side of the country a few years back, so my parents made the cousins stay in my room and gave me our old couch that used to be in the living room. They were here for like two weeks, it was fucking awful," I remarked, pulling a comforter out of the closet and unfolding it out on the mattress.

"That sounds miserable," Tyler sympathized.

"It was, but hey, now I got a sick as fuck couch in my room! And it works as a great place for certain friends to sleep when they wanna spend the night," I said sarcastically, looking over at Tyler as I grabbed the pillows from the closet, tossing them to one end of the bed.

He turned his head, baffled, "Was that a dig on me?" He questioned.

"Depends on how you took it I suppose," I replied, smiling cunningly.

"You're the one who offered, dude- are you sure you didn't drink at the party? You've at least doubled your usual level of sarcasm." He retorted.

"Nope, unless somebody spiked my soda!" I joked, but the realisation slowly set in, "Oh shit- maybe someone spiked my soda?!?"

"Don't freak out, I seriously doubt someone would spike your drink,"

"God, I hope so, if my parents found out I went to that party, that'd be one thing, but if I got drunk? I doubt I'd see the outside world for months," I sighed.

"Even if you were drunk, it's not like you would still be drunk in the morning for them to find out, anyway."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," I said, letting out a yawn shortly thereafter. "Fuck, I didn't realise how tired I am." Looking at my alarm clock, it was 10:37 PM. That wasn't terribly late, I've definitely stayed up later when there was an assignment due the next day that I forgot about, but even before I met up with Alex and Elliot, that party was just wearing me down. "At least I can sleep in 'till like noon tomorrow. You sure you don't need anything before I pass out from exhaustion?"

"No, I'm okay, I think. And, thank you... Jake." He replied, smiling at me.

"No problem, dude!" I quietly exclaimed as I turned off the bedroom lights and hopped into bed. I can practically feel my muscles dissolve as I lean into the mattress, pulling the heavy blankets over me as I close my eyes.

I can't help but feel something itching in the back of my brain. I never did find out why Tyler was even crying back at the party. Was it related to what he told me after? He sounded pretty upset when he was talking to whoever it was in the hallway, too, so maybe that was why? We've already talked about so much shit tonight, though, and I definitely did not have the energy to have another huge conversation about something like that. It could definitely wait until tomorrow.

Soon, I feel my consciousness drift away, the only sound I can make out being the slow breathing of Tyler, across the room.

---

As I wake up, I'm blinded by the bright sun shining in through my windows, directly into my eyes. I glance over at my alarm clock, feeling incredibly groggy and sore, noticing that it's 11:13 AM. Usually, the latest I'd sleep in on weekends was only around ten, but I guess it took a lot of my energy yesterday to try to tune the party out. At least it's over.

I slowly sit up, yawning as I lean back against the bed frame. I glanced around the room, noticing that the hide-a-bed had been folded back into the couch, Tyler nowhere to be seen. I reach over to my bedside table to check my phone, finding an unread text from him, sent a few hours ago.

Tyler: hey

woke up early, figured youd want 2 sleep in.

will call u later, might have somthin big i wanna share, will see

A pair of oddly cryptic messages. Guess that confirms he isn't here anymore.

At least it was a Saturday, meaning that I had full permission to be a slob. I get out of bed, deciding to skip my usual shower until after breakfast. Other than the snacks that were out at the party, I ate practically nothing last night. I could almost feel my stomach turning itself inside out, so I hurried out of my room and downstairs to the kitchen to have some breakfast.

The first thing I notice when I get downstairs is my mom, sitting on the couch with a book. I head straight to the kitchen, trying not to make myself stand out.

"Jake! Finally woken up, I see." She remarked, still looking at her book.

"Hey, mom!" There's a moment of silence as I grab a bowl out of the cupboard, as well as a box of cereal, and begin to pour.

She speaks up, "Your friend, Tyler, seemed to be in a hurry to leave this morning, anything I should know about?"

"...Not that I know of? Like what?" I questioned as I poured some milk from the fridge, grabbed a spoon, and sat at the kitchen counter.

"Well, it's not like we didn't notice that you weren't home by ten like your father asked you to be, so obviously you must have a good excuse for why you didn't at least call to let us know you'd be late?" She replied. I could tell when she started talking all responsible-parent-like, it meant that she was gonna lecture me about something.

I sighed, thinking of the right thing to say. "...Well, Tyler was going through some things... so I was trying to help him with that, I guess. Time just kinda flew by and I wasn't able to get home 'till later."

"So he spent the night here? Weren't you at his house?" She asked as I ate a spoonful of cereal.

"Yeah... we went out for a bit and once I noticed how late it was I offered to let him spend the night at our house since it was closer," I said. Almost entirely a lie, but definitely preferable to the truth.

"Jake..." She said, setting her book down on the coffee table in front of the couch, walking over to me, and resting a hand on my shoulder. "You're sixteen now, obviously we don't expect you to tell us everything you're up to nowadays. But we worry about you! I worry about you. Just for future reference, please let us know if you're gonna be home late or anything like that."

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind," I said, looking up at her.

"Great! Now, I have to go meet a friend for lunch, please try not to burn the house down while I'm out!" She said as she grabbed her purse and keys off of the counter, hurring out the door.

"No promises, love you!" I said as she closed the door behind her.

Well, I guess that went... better than expected? I doubt she believed that story I made up, but I guess as long as I don't break curfew without telling them, I should be fine.

Having the house to myself wasn't totally uncommon. Considering my dad was gone during the day five days a week, and my mom would head out to go meet friends or run errands pretty often, I got some much needed alone time often enough to not go mad.

As I finish my bowl of cereal, I realise that I probably should go shower as soon as possible, considering the night I had. I put my bowl and spoon in the dishwasher and head back upstairs. I grab a towel from my room and head into the bathroom, grabbing my various fur care products out of the cabinet for after the shower. As I turn the shower on, I hear the sound of my ringtone going off in the pocket of my pants on the floor. I sigh annoyedly, walking over and trying to figure out which pocket my phone was in. When I flip open the phone, the Caller ID reads out Tyler's name.

"Tyler! What's up?" I ask eagerly, hoping to find out what the news he cryptically texted about was.

"Jake- fuck, I messed up, I shouldn't have- what am I gonna do?" He said anxiously, sounding almost out of breath.

"Hey! Slow down, what's wrong?" I questioned.

"I'm such a fucking idiot! Why did I think this would be a good idea? Jake, I'm so sorry-"

"Tyler! Calm. Down. Just take a few deep breaths," I said. After a few moments, I can hear his breathing steadying on the other side of the call. "Okay, good. Now, what's wrong?"

There's a short pause as he tries to find the right words to say. It sounds like he's been crying. What even the fuck has been the past twenty-four hours?

"Can- do you think I could crash at y- your place for a few more nights? I don't know what to do."

#story #novel #interlude #writing #novel writing #vestige #town #coming of age #lgbtq #gay #furry #wattpad

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

Text

Survey #302

“heaven ain’t close in a place like this”

What color are your eyes? Grayish blue. What's your favorite type of milk? If we're talking the basics, ig 1% is fine. What would you change about your appearance if you could? Oh, hunny, you got time for an essay? What would you change about your bedroom if you could? I need to fucking finish decorating it... It's not finished by no fault but my own laziness. Are you rich or poor? We're definitely pretty poor. Are you double jointed? I don't think so. What's the most physically painful thing you've ever experienced? I once had a large infected cyst that had to be drained by applying pressure to it, and I swear to Christ I don't know how I didn't faint. They gave me morphine and multiple numbing shots, but none of that did SHIT. I'm not even embarrassed by the fact I was shrieking and sobbing and swearing because I'm pretty fucking sure any sane person would've cried out many times. I'm convinced they either didn't numb me enough for someone of my size back then, or I should've just gone under for it. I have no words for how painful it really was. Do you like shots? Uh, given that nobody LIKES getting a shot with a needle, I'm going to assume you mean like, taking shots of alcohol, in which case I've never tried, but I can almost absolutely guarantee you I'd hate them. I hate the taste of alcohol (hence why I only drink sweet and weak stuff), sooooo, I've got my doubts I'd enjoy something so potent. Are you afraid of spiders? Yes and no? Small ones don't tend to get to me, and I LOVE tarantulas. Big spiders are absolutely fascinating and I love *watching* them, but if I was surprised by a sudden spider, I'm going to probably cry out and jump/scramble away. But on a real note, respect your spiders, whether they scare you or not. They are so important to the ecosystem. See one in the house, take it outside if you can. Have you ever had an allergic reaction to something? To some earrings, yes. I have to wear ones that don't have silver in them. Do you like to read? Yeah, but not nearly as much as I did as a kid. I'm even slacking on WoF lately... Do you know what your purpose in life is? *SLAMS FISTS ON TABLE* BITCH I WISH I KNEW What's something you would like to improve at? Not being a socially anxious catastrophe. Do you believe you have great potential? Everybody does. You just have to use it. What is the most beautiful scenery you have ever beheld? Probably the mountains when driving to Tennessee. Or New York? I really can't recall either so clearly as to have a favorite. Are you flexible? Noooot anymore. Back in my WiiFit days, I was a gotdamn snake. List a song lyric that you like. Oh Jesus, don't make me think. Uhhhhh there's so many. Flipping through artists in my head with lyrics I tend to love, there's Otep with: "hey, hey, NRA, how many kids did you kill today?". Simple, but spine-chilling to me. Huh, time to listen to it actually, lol. That song murders me with the goosebumps. Do you meditate? No; I can't. You can't tell me to "free my mind," man. It's way too hectic at all times up there. What's one place you've been to that you want to visit again? I'd love to go back to Chicago one night when I actually learn how to do nighttime urban photography. What's one place you want to go that you've never visited before? I always answer "South Africa" to questions like this, so for variety's sake, I'll say the Bahamas. But a conspiratory bitch is afraid of the Bermuda Triangle, so... lmao. What's your favorite type of tree? I like big, impressive weeping willows. How many times have you seriously injured yourself? Only two occasions I can think of immediately. Maybe there's more, but idk. Did you attend Sunday School as a child? Yeah, even though I hated it. What is the longest your hair has ever been? Maybe a little passed the small of my back? What about the shortest? (not including being a toddler or baby): How it is now and has been for a couple years: shaved short on the left side, and it transitions to a length near my chin as you go to the right. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? No. Are/were you in the school band, and if so, what instrument did you play? I did, and I played the flute. I'd choose the saxophone if I could go back. Who does the grocery shopping in your household? Well, it's just Mom and me, so her. If you were to donate to charity today, what would you donate to? One that focuses on ovarian cancer for Mom. What is your favorite card game and when was the last time you played it? Even though I was never great at it or knew every single rule, "Magic: The Gathering" is honestly really fun, and I loved looking at the card art. I haven't played it since I was with Jason, so at least five-six years. Would you consider yourself to be good at spelling and grammar? Yeah, but I've somehow gotten worse with time???? I question the spelling and tenses of words I write a lot. What is your favourite seasonal candy? (only available at certain times): Probably like, chocolate rabbits. NOT hollow. Way to break my heart. Or gingerbread cookies. What was the last chocolate bar you ate? I think a Hershey's? It was a while ago. Who was the last person you talked to on Skype/video chat? I was in a Zoom session with multiple people for my partial hospitalization program. Have you ever dreamt about sleeping with someone other than your partner? If so, did that make you feel embarrassed? I've never had a dream like this while in a relationship. The last time you had butterflies in your stomach, what was the reason? I have no idea. Has anyone told you that they miss you recently? No. Has anyone ever asked you out or told you that they liked you, and you rejected them? Can you explain why you didn’t like, or didn’t feel attracted to that person? There was this one guy in the 4th grade who asked me if I would go out with him so much it almost became like a joke. I just... didn't like him like that. Then there's Juan; I'd just been warned that he had a bad rep by a very reliable adult, and the idea of dating him was kinda... intimidating anyway. Plus he was a smoker, which was and still is a no-no for me. What part in a movie would you love to play? The clinically insane villain or something because I feel with my history, I could channel that very well IF I actually wanted to act in the first place. What piece of furniture have you replaced the most? The couch. What’s the best part of your favorite movie? When Simba walks up Pride Rock in the rain and roars and all the lionesses join in. Chilling. What do you think is the most over-rated candy ever? Candy corn is repulsive. What was the highlight of your day? My mom was raving to one of my therapists in the PHP about my art and how badly she wants me to just get everything out there. I was smiling really big but looking down with how shy but also flattered it made me. Do you know anyone who is anorexic? I don't think so. Who has hurt you the most this year? Ha, myself. What's the last insult someone said to you? Hm. How much did your car cost? N/A What is the last picture you received on your phone of? Uhhh Mom mighta sent me a meme or Sara showed me a drawing someone made of Suriza, I think. Have you ever let someone go because you thought they deserved better? No, though I've felt that way before. Is there anybody you're really disappointed in right now? I'm still not over the fact Dad was a druggie before me and my sisters, apparently. It's almost like... hurtful in some weird way? Idk exactly why, it's just something I know I feel. What do you hear right now? I have Motionless In White's cover of "Somebody Told Me" playing in another tab. Do you do anything to help the environment? I do what I can as someone who isn't financially independent and reliant on another person for transportation. I won't litter for anything (and this includes shit like letting balloons go in the air, fucking stop), I'm trying to use my metal straw always in place of plastic, and to use less plastic bags, I try to spread out the times I clean Roman's litterbox to a few days; not to the point it's disgusting or uncomfortable for him, of course, though. Three days without is pretty much max. When's the last time you did something you knew was wrong? Ha, a little while ago... I was trying to avoid eating the two last biscuits Mom made for dinner 'cuz I really gotta lay off the carbs, but Mom "joked" that "it's your birthday, you get to do whatever you want," so I kinda just said fuck it lmao. Do you think that you have a pretty smile? No, because my eyes squint badly, and I also hate my teeth. When's the last time you cried over a guy? A few days ago a little bit, actually. I was reminiscing too much and recalling some of the warmest memories. Are you scared to lose the person you fell the hardest for? I already did. Oh well. Is there someone you wouldn't mind kissing right now? Yep. Do you have any friends that actually model? No. Do you care about the last person you kissed? A fucking lot. Do they care about you? Yes. Is there someone you wish you were with right now? Yes, just because of past birthday memories. I keep hoping a "happy birthday Britt" pops up in my FB messenger, and I hate myself for it. Have you ever imagined how it would feel kissing a certain someone? I legitimately just huffed in humor, guess, lmao. What are the bad things you've heard people say about you? That I'm a martyr, going nowhere, lazy, not trying hard enough, y'know, all that good stuff. Do you flirt a lot? Definitely not. What phrase or saying do you use the most? Probably "oof" lol. What mood are you in right now? I'm doing pretty all right. Kinda dreading Miss Tobey coming over, mean as it is, but I just... don't wanna deal with her and her judgments on my birthday. But I'm looking forward to seeing my sisters, and therapy went very well. Have you ever kissed someone that was high? No. Do you have a good relationship with your mother? Yep. How many exes do you have? I only consider two exes "serious," as I've only been in two deep and long-term relationships, but if we're counting everyone who's had the label of "boyfriend" or "girlfriend," there's six. Do you want to be single or with someone? Ugh, I don't know. It's probably better I don't 'til I figure my shit out, but I really do miss the companionship a lot. Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Because I love her and I was leaving her at the airport. Does your mom think you’re a virgin? She doesn't know for the same reason I don't, really. I think she leans towards I am, but idk. Is there someone that wants you to give them a second chance? I don't know. What size bra do you wear? Uhhh I genuinely don't buy bras enough to know this exactly. C-something. Does the person you last kissed still like you? I don't know if she still like-likes me. Are your parents still together? Noooo. Was your first time good or bad? I dated an Italian, if u kno what I mean. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Which friend-turned-enemy do you miss the most? Colleen, sometimes. Have you ever used an epi pen, and it worked? I have not. What is on your top priority list for today? Make this fuckin' day for me. I'm trying to not let the depression sink in and make me feel worthless on today of all days. So I'm trying to stay in a positive headspace. Do you own any sand art in a jar? Omg, those are so cool! But no. Does the sun come in your window in the morning or at night? Not really; there's houses in the way. What was the last piece of art you created? A drawing of a meerkat with its mouth open angrily, done with colored pencils, against a black background. It's on my second dA. What time of day do you take medications? I have prescription meds for when I wake up and at bedtime. What's your newest hobby you've started? A new hobby? Huh... What are some things you wanted to do that your parents didn't let you do? They wouldn't let us stay home alone until a certain age, we had a timer on the TV at bedtime to shut off after a while, we weren't exposed to certain music or shows, no cursing... stuff like that. What YouTube channels do you recommend? This is a BAD question to ask me, 'cuz I could just about recommend channels for just about any niche. I watch soooooo many. What is your favorite day of the week? Tuesday, because it's reset day in WoW, haha. Meaning, I get to do my stupid mount farming raids again for the week. Blackhand, gimme your FUCKING clefthoof already. Ballet or cheerleading? Ballet is beautiful. What are your favorite sports to watch? Only dancing, really. Were you ever in the marching band? No. Which holiday has the best decorations, in your opinion? My contrasting aesthetics make this hard, haha. I love Christmas with all the beautiful light displays people can make, but let's not sleep on Halloween, y'all. I loooove Halloween decor, like c'mon, that's where I get shit for my room year-round, lmao. What do you want to be known for? It'd actually be kinda cool if I built up some sort of rep in the vulture culture community with my photography of roadkill. For how few shots I actually have on there and minimal interaction, my Instagram for it is doing quite well, if you consider those factors. They've gotten some pretty decent attention on dA, too. I would love for people to know why I do it though, of course: awareness and respect for the animal's life. How often do you wear make-up? Almost never nowadays. Think of the person you are jealous of...what are you jealous of them for? She's actually making a career out of her photography. Do you have art that you made in high school? Oh, plenty. Do you have trauma in your past? *clears throat* take a fuckin seat Favorite type of frosting? Chocolate. Have you ever tried cake decorating? No. One of my sisters is actually one, though! She's great at it. What clubs are you a part of? None. What was your favorite book that you had to read for school? The Outsiders. 6th grade, to be exact. Do you like to read classics, or do you usually read new arrivals? I don't prefer one over the other, honestly. Were you a big partier in college? No, I never partied. Is your college one you would recommend? My most recent one, fuck yes. They're amazing and care so deeply for their students. Would you go camping in the woods alone? Yikes, no. Would you name your kids after anyone? If I had a son and I had my way with the name, he would be named after the Most Selfless Man in the World, Damien from WKM. :'''''( Do you have any supernatural gifts? No. Are there any good churches in your town? You're asking someone who has a bad relationship with religion. Do you want an indoor or outdoor wedding? It really depends on the season and venue my spouse and I pick. Do you think you would be a good salesperson? HEEEEEEEEEEEELL NAW fam. I ain't pressuring people to buy shit.

#survey #surveys #questions #questionnaire #lyrics: ''somebody told me'' by motionless in white

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douchebagbrainwaves · 4 years ago

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STARTUPS AND SOMETHING

How many even discover something they love to work on them. But that assumption is often false, and worse still, the more ideas you implement, the more you push the good stuff spreads, and the programmers work down the list, fixing them. The most important quality in a CEO is his vision for the company's future.1 You don't give up on your dreams.2 There are only two things you have to manufacture your own hardware, or use your software, you should probably be able to come up with an idea that sounded plausible, but was actually bad. If you pay them by the volume of work done but only as you defined work.3 There are only two reasons someone might sue you: for money, but what will make you a better programmer, and yet they don't seem to matter very much in software is public opinion—or rather, hacker opinion.4

It's exceptionally rare for startups to have traction before they put in significant money. Efficiency matters for server-based software, you can think instead That's an interesting idea, you can find and fix most bugs as soon as they appear. T: Scheme has no libraries. The reason design counts so much in software is public opinion—or who might buy a copy later, when he has just read in the paper that some other language is poised, like Ada was twenty years ago people noticed computers and TV were on a collision course and started to speculate about what they'd like to publish their lives semi-publicly on the Internet, you don't need Microsoft on the client, it will be because it's more convenient. There are many exceptions to this rule. In fact, shelving an idea probably even inhibits new ideas: as you become more eminent, gradually to increase the actual value of the company. He walks right by them, dressed up as an old man on crutches, and they never suspect him.5 I don't mean to disparage Yahoo.

But though labor unions are shrinking now, it's not a sufficient one. It works, but you come from the corporate world and your friends are not early adopters, and only realize later that they could always interrupt anything with a report of a genuine bug.6 I can think of three possible reasons. And that did turn out to be big like Microsoft.7 The five languages that Eric Raymond recommends to hackers fall at various points on the power continuum. For millennia that was the optimal path to dominating a big market. Boston half the time: it's hard to imagine now, but I don't think they hamper innovation much.8 We, as hackers, know the USPTO is letting people patent the knives and forks of our world.

To us that's positive evidence an idea is good. Web-based software is offered through ISPs acting as resellers. It looks as if it will be whatever the startup can get from the first one to write a novel, for example, even though it is probably a bad idea. What really makes him stand out, though, that even with all the fat trimmed off its market cap, Yahoo was still worth a lot. Most people could see how it might be helpful to be in the twentieth century. In Lisp, these programs are called macros. Nor do startups, at least something that made me feel better about it. The definition then spread to people who behaved like assholes in forums, whether intentionally or not. In fact, worse than arrogant: since readers are used to companies ignoring them.9 Microsoft and Facebook both got started in January. From the evidence I've seen so far is nothing compared to what's coming.10 They work odd hours, wearing the most casual of clothing.

They even let hackers spend 20% of their time on their own projects, and instead of trying to approximate the value of free markets, are run internally like communist states. They just sit there quietly radiating optimism, like a well is almost a necessary condition for a good startup idea. Smalltalk: Not everything in Simula is an object. It's one of the heavy school record players and played James Taylor's You've Got a Friend to us. Our approach to support made everyone happier. The same thing will happen if you're running a big company is the same thing to them.11 But that assumption is often false, and worse still, the more a project has to count as research is so narrow that it's unlikely that a project that satisfied that constraint would also satisfy the orthogonal constraint of solving users' problems in a way that he made seem effortless. And when you have a recurring revenue stream.12 I notice something surprising, it's usually a big company will be their big break. If applications run on remote servers, no one can get between you and potential users without preventing them from browsing the Web. Look at this, for example, as property in the way only founders can.

You're going to have to add a spoonful of sugar to make the release date you assemble a team of qualified experts and tell them to make a living. But designed is not really the word; discovered is more like it. TV is probably dead. Indeed, food is an excellent metaphor to explain what's wrong with the usual sort of job. The source code of the Viaweb editor was probably about 20-25% of the code in this program is doing things that don't scale that we call pulling a Meraki. But it would require a great moral effort; it would mean staring failure in the eye every day for years. Now everyone knows that this is changing. Working in crappy informal spaces is one of Silicon Valley's biggest weaknesses. If you think of using Lisp in a startup.

When one company or industry replaces another, it usually works best to get something in front of it. It doesn't add; it multiplies. One day, when the stock was trading around $200, I sat down and calculated what I thought before Viaweb, to the extent I thought about what it meant to call someone a hero, it meant something to talk about their previous startup idea while they were working at their day jobs. Few would be willing to claim that it doesn't matter at all where a startup is to focus on bad ones. By the time journalists covering the press release got round to calling us, we would take. If the startup can't raise the rest, the lead is out too. Umair Haque wrote recently that the reason there aren't more Googles is that most essays are written to persuade. And if you're writing a program that only has to do.13 Neither Apple nor Yahoo nor Google nor Facebook were even supposed to be a good trick to look for waves and ask how one could benefit from them. In the first couple bites feels great.

Only a handful actually do, and the enforcement of quality can flow bottom-up often works better than top-down.14 The reason I want to plant a hypnotic suggestion in your heads: when you can say things you wouldn't say in conversation. When you read of big companies. With server-based software before you buy it. When they go to VC firms. Especially since you won't even really learn about it, they'll be able to come up with surprising new ideas.15 Each type of schedule from other people. Open source and blogging both work bottom-up: people make what they want when they want it, and gradually whatever features it happens to have become its identity. You should compete against what someone else could be doing, not just because it's free, but because they felt it was really for them, they'll get a lot done during those few days, you will be net more productive.16 Howard Aiken said Don't worry about people stealing your ideas. The most memorable example of medieval industrial secrecy is probably Venice, which forbade glassblowers to leave the city, and fragile organisms like startups are exceedingly sensitive to such variation. On the Web, and it also tends to have the time and the inclination to build things that are impossible to build.

Notes

Maybe you don't go back and forth. As willful people get serious about tax avoidance. Stone, op.

If Ron Conway had been campaigning for the next round is high as well.

Only founders of Google to do some research online. But it's a bad idea, at least try.

The problem with most of the reason. And though they have to sweat any one outcome. If spammers get good enough to convince limited partners. No one seems to have lunch at the exact same thing.

The Socialist People's Democratic Republic of X is probably the early 90s when they set up an additional disk drive. Among other things, they mean statistical distribution. If a man has good corn or wood, or much energy would be investors who say no for introductions to other investors, but explain that's what you're working on what interests you most. A company will either be a lot easier now for a patent is conveniently just longer than the set of users comes from.

I assume we still do things that will be maximally profitable when each employee is paid in proportion to the present day equivalent of the startup will be on the subject of language power in Succinctness is Power. I write out loud at least straightforwardly benevolent, doesn't help people on the valuation a bit of an outcast, just those you can never tell for sure a social network for x instead of happy. But on the other becomes visible.

But the solution is to the writing of literary theorists.

The answer is simple: pay them to. The greatest damage that photography has done to painting may be that the applicant pool gets partitioned by quality rather than giving grants. It's lame that VCs play such games, but mediocre programmers is the other side of the present, and stir. 5% a week for 4 years.

It is a sufficiently good bet, why not turn your company right now. And the old one was nothing special. Maybe it would have been the general sense of the problem, if they can get very emotional. Just use the local builders built everything in exactly the point I'm making, though it's a seller's market.

I'm just going to need common sense when intepreting it. While Jessica didn't ask many questions, they sometimes say.

If anyone wants. Giant tax loopholes defended by two of the breach with Rome, where w is will and d discipline.

There is of course the source files of all tend to be about 200 to send a million dollars out of the false positives reflecting the remaining outcomes don't have to give up your anti-takeover laws, starting with the exception of the big winners aren't all that matters, just the location of the words won't be trivial. The CRM114 Discriminator. To talk to feel tired.

This argument seems to them. Conjecture: The variation in wealth over time, because you need to fix.

In a series A round about the right way.

What he meant, I was not drinking that kool-aid at the start of the clumps of smart people are trying to make you expend as much income. Turn the other team. Http requests are indistinguishable from dishonesty by the high-fiber diet is to use a restaurant is constrained in a certain way, because talks are usually more desperate for money.

This is actually a computer. He did eventually graduate at about 26. We're delighted to have them soon.

#automatically generated text #Markov chains #Paul Graham #Python #Patrick Mooney #power #someone #outcome #idea

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diem-writes · 7 years ago

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Chocolates and Chocobo’s

Very late valentine gift for @magatsula on twitter for the @ffxvalentines exchange. I was planning to just write a cute little story but it kinda blew up on me and turned in a piece nearly 6k long. And I had to cut several pieces so GladioxIgnis is more background than originally planned.

Chocolates and Chocobo’s

Prompto looks at the chocolates in the window display on his way home from class, he shakes his head mumbling how they are getting ready for valentines way too early. He eyes a pretty tin box shaped as a chocobo, labeled 'Special Edition' and 'Limited', even if he could afford it chocolates were cut from his diet the moment he decided he needed to get in shape. But that tin…

“Maybe I can get some extra hours and save for it. Nobody says I have to eat the chocolates.”

Getting the extra hours wasn't even that hard, convincing his boss to pay him at the end of every week for them was a bit harder. He had worried about telling Noct about having less time to hang out but he had told him that he was actually a bit busy with something he had promised Ignis so it all worked out. Noct was asking enough questions as it was about why he needed his part-time jobs to begin with. And there were only that many times you can claim to be saving for a new lens.

For the next few weeks his schedule is swamped between classes, part-time jobs, and trying to get the presents he wants to get Noct, Iggy, and Gladio ready. One of the best parts about being best friends with a prince is that even a simple weekend get away has to get planned weeks in advance. No chance on slipping out when important things are planned at the Citadel apparently.

He runs up the stairs to the seventh floor to make certain his copy is in on time. Some people at the paper joke it's because he freaked out that first day when the elevator made that six awful sound, he knows it's because he's actually faster than the poor contraption. He makes it to the floor in a new record time and a quick look at the elevator tells him it has only just reached the fourth floor. One day he'll manage to get up when it's still at three.

“Oy Prompto” He looks up when his name gets called by one of the writers of the showbiz section. Wondering what the man might want he slowly nods. “You go to school with the Prince right? Got any inside info on what his Valentines day is going to be?” Prompto looks short taken for a moment before shaking his head.

“It's a school day. So I'm fairly certain he'll be attending his classes.” Play the fool, and keep it up. The thought runs through his mind. After all right now there is no one who knows he's friends with the prince and according to Iggy they want to keep it like that. People know how Noct looks but there is a strict rule to the press to keep their distances when he's not attending official events.

The man just nods at that. “Is the school planning anything though? Last year they had that impromptu valentine ball and he had to duck out because of a previous engagement. Just wonder what they are planning this year.” Prompto just shrugs, not even lying about not knowing as he had ducked out the year before, claiming he was sick the whole week.

After that he's finally allowed to go to the main editors room. He always gets a bit jittery about that as this woman decided if his pictures were going to be used or not. And he needed the extra money that that would bring in. When she calls him in her voice sounds way too cheerful for his mood.

“Ah Prompto just the guy I wanted to see.” she folds her hands in front of her on her desk after motioning for him to sit down. “As you know Valentines is coming up.” Prompto nods even if it's not a question. “As you attend the same year as the Prince I hoped you would do us the pleasure of taking some snapshots of him accepting some presents in school. It would be such a...”

“No can do Ma'am.” Prompto shakes his head to underline his statement. “There is a very strict rule against taking photo's on school grounds. All for the safety of the prince. Can't risk expulsion.”

She looks at him for moment. “When you say photo's you just mean photo's of him, right?” Prompto shakes his head.

“Nope last year I had taken my new camera with me to school to take up some shots of the track-fields. The Prince wasn't even is school that day, but my camera was still confisated for the day and I ended up having to write a nasty essay.”

The editor takes his words and seems to think them over for a moment. “Well it was worth a try. Would have seriously boost our sales, but it can't be helped. Now show me what you got for us.”

Prompto walks out the building with enough money in his pockets to get all the things he needs for Iggy and Gladio's presents. When he looks at his watch he realizes he even has enough time to run over to the shop and get them to put them aside for him. Luckily the owner knows him from when he helped out over the summer break.

The next morning he nearly oversleeps because the restaurant had been even more crowded than normally. Seemed there was this 'cute new guy' working part-time in the kitchen which had resulted in them having to sent people away from the door at one point. And as Prompto was the lowest of the waiters that had been his job.

Seeing Noct slumped over his desk brings the first real smile of the day to Prompto's tired lips. Seems his friend is as tired out from his after school activities as he is. He just slips in the desk next to him dropping his head on his arms, simply looking, waiting for his friend to stir. Noct's lashes flutter open just seconds after the final bell for class.

“Hey buddy. Seems you had a rough night.” Prompto smiles. “We could ditch the final hour as it's only some reviewing and we both know Iggy's going to do a much better job at that.” Noct blinks for a moment and nods.

In the end they decide to ditch the class but only by going to the school library and putting up their books in the furthest corner. As long as they keep their voices down no one's going to bother them their.

“Dropped some photo's at the paper yesterday. They took at least half of them for this weekends extra pages. But when I was there the editor, I've talked about her right,” Noct nods “well she suddenly asks me if I can get a candid picture of you during this years valentines thing. Told her no can do. Very strict rules.” Prompto grins “She believed me.”

“Do you think they suspect us being friends?” urgency runs deep in Noct's voice and Prompto is quick in shaking his head. “Are you sure?”

“Positive buddy. All they know is that I attend the same school, I'm certain they'd be asking for different photo's if they knew.” Prompto smiles “Plus I don't even know what the schools got planned for valentines this year anyway.”

“Wait! You don't know? There have been posters and memo's and bulletin boards for nearly three weeks now. Their Pink!! With hearts!!”

A loud shussing being sent their way make it clear Noct's voice went a bit too loud, he takes a deep breath before he continues.

“After last years debacle the school decided on a different approach. It has Iggy written all over it.”

Realizing Prompto really has no idea what's going to happen Noctis decides to just show him. He pulls Prompto up by the wrist and drags him to the bulletin board near the door of the Library. He sees his friends eyes go over the text a few times before looking back at him.

“Seriously. This really does have Iggy written all over him. And the school just agreed?”

Noctis just pulls up one of his eyebrows exactly the way Iggy always does, making Prompto remember who he's actually talking too. Of course the school agreed to something that was proposed to them by the adviser of the Crowned Prince. They wouldn't dare not to.

“At least there's a way to do it anonymous, but those mail boxes” Prompto shakes his head “you just know people will take advantage of those and bully people. Not to mention that it's going to be too easy to compare content if just anybody can get near them.”

A shiver goes down Prompto's back, he can clearly remember his first valentines event, he never wants to think of that day again. At least the last few years he and the other members of the photography club exchanged something, so he didn't really run the risk of having an empty box. And he ditched last year, so maybe…

“You'll be by my side the whole day right?” Prompto looks at Noct who is looking at the bulletin with a pensive look on his face. “It's clearly stated that you are not allowed to hand anything over during or between classes unless it's your class's turn to go around, but last year I was late for two classes just because some girls cornered me at my locker.”

He looks at Prompto with what can only be described as annoyance laced with fear. “You'll keep me safe right? Iggy's been threatening to have either Gladio or one of the Glaives keep a close eye on me the entire day.” he huffs “As if that is going to make them less likely to harass me.”

“Sure buddy. I'm at your side the whole day.” He slaps a hand on Noct's shoulder a bit more harshly then it was needy. “I'll just surrogate as a handler for the day.” His wink falls short when he sees the bright grin on Noct's face. Why does he feel he fell in some kind of trap? “Plus we have that weekend away to look forward to afterwards. So let's not get bothered about this” he waves at the bulletin “and just spend the day solidifying our plans.”

Noct snorts. “Seriously. We both know it's going to be me fishing, you'll end up making more perfectly aimed pictures than humanly should be possible, Gladio will be either reading or practicing with the broadsword, and I heard Iggy talk about some new recepeh's he came across. What else do we need to plan?” Prompto grins.

“What games to take with us of course. You said the place we're staying had an entertainment system.” he sees it when Noct gets what Prompto is going after. No way could even he pack all his games for this trip, Iggy would never let them. “See? That is why you need me.” They bump their shoulders on their way back to the table.

Prompto managed to finishes the last pieces of the presents of Iggy and Gladio the night before valentines day, his present for Noct ready and put in a box for days. Looking at the drawer he keeps his savings in, he sighs about now being able to by that new lens once it's back in stock. He'd sped off to the shop the moment he had gotten his last payment only to find out that they had sold the last chocobo tin just that morning to a sharply dressed man.

If he had gotten the tin first and the item's for Iggy and Gladio's presents later he would have gotten it, but then he would have run the chance to not have his gifts ready. He sighs again.

“At least I'm fairly certain they will like their gifts. I just hope Noct will like his.” Prompto's eyes wonder to the small box on the corner of his desk. He reaches out his hand, intent to put the box in his bag, but pulls it back in.

His teeth start to work his bottom lip, holding his hand from grabbing the box, feeling the nerves run amok in his stomach. He wants to give it to Noct, he really does, just, it might be a bit much if he did it in school. Sure he could use the 'anonymously put it on their desk before classes start' moment, but it would mean having to get to school and sneak off before classes.

“Why am I worried? I'll just give it to him when we are alone. Sure the rules state not to do that but I'm his best friend surely I have some wiggle room.”

He pulls on his jacket the moment his doorbell chimes, making him look up in surprise. No one ever comes around at this hour, worried something happened to one of his neighbors he runs to the door and pulls it open.

“Not a very safe thing to do, not checking who is in front of your door.” The cheerful smile of the Glaive startles Prompto, he quickly sticks his head around to see if no one can see this very clear Glaive in front of his door. When the coast is clear he grabs the Glaive's shirt and jerks the man inside slamming the door closed.

“What do you think you are doing here?” The Glaive simply cocks his eyebrow. “Do not give me a look like that. I have had more lectures about how I need to be careful, how I'm not allowed to make people realize that I have any closer connection to Noct than us simply going to school together, and I can tell you having a Glaive show up at your door makes people talk!”

Prompto's chest heaves from trying not to scream all of this at the other man. Who simply nods.

“All true. But Ignis sent me to pick you up as it seems press has gathered at the school gates, so I am here to drive you to the back entry on Noct's request.” There's a twinkling in the man's eyes that have Prompto wonder just how much of this is to the man's delight. “The names Nyx Ulric by the way, in case you'd like to know.”

After that Nyx makes it clear Prompto has to grab his coat, backpack, and shoes. When they step out Prompto looks around to make certain no curtains are moving, he doesn't want people to talk about him and jeopardize his friendship with Noct. He stills when Nyx opens the door to a very expensive looking car. A car with the Royal crest on it.

Sitting in the backseat of the car is nerve wrecking, and he's unable to keep his fingers out of his hair. Nyx just looks at him in the rear view mirror with a knowing smile. It isn't till they take a turn that will lead them right passed the front gates of the school he finally gets it.

“I'm the diversion ain't I?” Finally the car's tinted windows make full sense. “If the press thinks the Prince is using a different entry they will leave the front gate alone.” before Nyx can even nod to confirm Prompto's hands move to flatten his hair down and he slumps down in such a way it's nearly impossible for anyone to get a good look at him. The hum he gets from Nyx make it clear the Glaive approves.

Sure enough, the moment Nyx brakes the car and starts backing away the press is all over the car, and they keep following when Nyx turns and moves to the back gates. Prompto refuses to look over the backseat feeling his insides twist. They make it fairly unscratched to the backdoor where Ignis is waiting for them. With an umbrella, even though it's not raining.

Turns out the umbrella is used to hide his head as blond is such a difference from black, no need for zoom lenses. Iggy is talking to Gladdy in his phone, and Nyx seems to be talking to some other people through his ear piece. When it's confirmed the front gate is cleared Noct is given permission to finally be dropped off. Prompto waits for him sitting in one of the chairs in front of the principals office. He grins when he sees Noct but the smile dies when he sees the apologetic look on his friends face.

“Dude, why are you looking at me like that for?” he springs to his feet and rushes over to grab Noct by his shoulders. “What happened?” He misses the look between Gladio and Nyx.

“I tried to tell them to do a different tactic.” Nocts shoulders slump “Really, having you used like this.” The prince pouts, he is pouting and Prompto just laughs.

“Seriously Noct, what are friends for if not to get annoying people off of their friends back. Sure most people just lie about staying over with friends and then going out on a date with somebody their parents don't approve of. But I doubt I could lie convincingly when Iggy calls me to inform if you are indeed safe at my place, so this is way better.” Noct chuckles at the thought of Prompto trying to convince Iggy of anything.

“So you don't mind?” He has to be certain.

“Sure next time I would like to get a heads up, it was a bit of a shock to suddenly have a Glaive at my front door, but that's my only complaint.”

“For that I will offer my apologies then,” both boys turn to see Ignis walk out of the principals office “I made the call quite at the last moment as I knew Nyx would be in your neighborhood.”

“Don't worry. Have you figured out why they are here though? As I thought the school was seriously off limits.” He feels Noct tense.

“It seems there's a rumor going around that I am dating somebody, and now they hope to catch me and that person exchange presents.” The look on Noct's face tell Prompto exactly how annoyed he is about this. “This will mean every student will keep a damn look on me to see if I give any valentine gifts today.” his hands tighten around his bag straps.

Prompto doesn't want to think about the sudden tightening in his stomach. Why had he not thought about Noct maybe liking somebody? Then again, if he did, wouldn't Prompto have been the first to know. “Well, nothing we can really do about that but keep our heads up and just act as always.”

“Well spoken, Prompto.” Prompto beams at the compliment Iggy gives him, in the few months he and Noct have been friends now the adviser was the hardest to convince he had no ulterior motives towards the prince. “Because of this though the king has ordered for Nyx to keep an eye on the two of you, just to be safe.” his tone makes it clear that it will have no use trying to argument about it.

Before they even could the bell rings to inform students classes are about to start. He's still bouncing around in his own head when they reach their homeroom, so absorbed he actually misses the pile on his desk, if not for Noct grabbing his bag when he tries to toss it on his desk like every morning. His eyes nearly double when he finally registers it all.

“What??” He quickly looks over to Nocts desk and sees that even the prince's chair is completely cluttered with gifts. “Guess they ran out of room on your desk and just dropped the overflow on mine.” he smiles for a moment till Noct shakes his head.

“Those are all for you buddy. You're kind of popular. Didn't you know?” Noct's looking at him in amazement, almost like he is expecting Prompto to admit he was just joking.

“Dude, I'm a lot of things but popular has never been any of it. Must be because we're friends.” At that Prompto turns and starts clearing the things from his desk. Only to find out that indeed every little thing was directed at him. Guess this is also a side effect of being friends with a royal.

He keeps up this denial throughout the day, as with every group that is allowed to go around and give their gifts he is bound to also get something when Noct gets something. His denial is twice as big when he does and Noct doesn't get anything. Plus the few people telling him they are happy for him really make him wonder if maybe the student body is just pulling of some elaborate joke.

It isn't till their class is allowed to go around he finally realizes he completely forgot to put the gifts for the photo-club members in his bag when Nyx showed up. So instead of standing up and drop them off he takes out his phone and sends them a group message telling them he'll be handing his gifts during club meeting the next day.

“You're not delivering anything?” He can't really place Noct's expression but he gives a small shake of the head.

“When Nyx showed up I hadn't put the gifts for the photo club members in my bag yet, so I'll just give them tomorrow during the meeting and there's no one else I'd want to give anything to.” he simply shrugs to show it's not that important, missing the slight slump in Noct's shoulders.

By the end of the day Prompto has a stack nearly as big as Noct's lying around his desk. The worried look on Prompto's face when he realizes there is no way he can ever take it all home with him gets dispelled when Nyx and two other Glaives walk in with boxes. Between the three of them everything gets packed up in minutes.

“Now while these are taken to the cars, and yes Prompto I'm driving you back home too, we can go to the auditorium to pick up the letters that were dropped off for you guys.” Nyx moves his hand to indicate for them to walk before him giving Prompto a quick wink. “And we counted them and checked them for needles and blades, so I'm pleased to say blondy beat you by three letters.”

Noct mumbles 'three' at the same moment Prompto turns and hurriedly whispers 'needles and blades', Nyx simply nods. “There was also one with a suspicious looking powder but it turned out to be harmless glitter. Don't worry though everything else is completely safe. Maybe a bit raunchy, but you are teenagers.”

It takes Prompto a moment to understand that this means the Glaives have read every letter just to make certain there were no dangerous letters between them. Guess having no private mail is also part of being a prince.

When he gets the box handed to him and he sees every envelope opened he figures it's also part of being best friends with a prince then.

“Happy reading boys,” the vice-principal smiles “Today really went well. Might make it tradition.”

It would be a lie if Prompto said he put in a lot of effort to read all of them. There had been simply too many and he still had classes, part-time jobs, and the weekend preparations, to take care of. So he had randomly picked out a few envelopes and cards and skimmed over them. He had come to the conclusion that he had been right, the majority had made comments about how happy they were for his relationship with Noct. Sure there had been some stating they had liked him but always thought he was not interested in other people. Those comments had simply made him snort.

“Seriously, all they had needed to do was ask if they had been really interested.”

When he had commented to Noct that he didn't even have a place for all the other things he had gotten Noct was more than willing to tell him that he had donated most of the things he had gotten to the local hospital and refugee centers, he was more than certain Iggy would let him do the same. One call later and he knew Nyx would drop by his house that night after his work to pick up anything he wanted to donate. That was quite a relief.

Going through the boxes told him that in the end he only wanted to keep two item's a cute chocobo plushie and a trinket you could wear on your clothes. He wondered why Nyx looked so relieved when he had singled those two things out, but he was still a bit flabbergasted about having an actual Glaive in his house to ask about it.

Leaving classes on Friday was an absolute relief especially as he had arranged not to have to work that night so he had taken his overnight bag with him to school that morning. Cramming it in his locker had been a bit of a struggle, he needed to clean some stuff out soon. Noct doesn't even try to keep his laughter down when half the content drops out when Prompto pulled the bag out.

“I'd hurry to put it all back before Iggy sees it and makes you clean it up before he lets us leave.” Prompto just drops to his knees and stuffs everything back in, hating once again that he got a bottom locker. He finished and kicked the door close the same moment Iggy and Gladio came around the corner. He misses both of their eyes locking on the trinket he had attached to his bag because he's too busy telling Noct he took several extra sets of clothes. Due to last time.

“You're not going to forgive me pushing you in the water are you?” Noct pouts but there's a cheeky glint in his eyes.

“Oh no, I forgave you. I'm just not going to spend a whole afternoon wet to the bone again.” Prompto bumps his fist against Noct's shouldeer grinning his hundred gigawatt smile making Noct chuckle.

The trip to Galdin Quay is rather uneventful with Noct dropping asleep on Gladio's shoulder the moment they left the school grounds and Prompto realizing he put his camera in his weekend bag and not his backpack so he only has his phone to take photo's. But as Iggy refuses to stop the car they are a bit blurry so he just ends up playing some games instead.

The place Iggy reserved for them is awesome, so different for what he's used to but he loves it. And the view is beyond what Prompto had expected. He had honestly thought they would be camping again, just like last time. When he finds out that they splurged and Noct and he have a room all to themselves with Iggy and Gladio taking up the room across the hall from theirs, and there was indeed an entertainment system placed in the room, he almost squeals like a chocobo chick.

After dinner they decide to play some games till it's time for bed, and for once they can stay up late as none of them have to get up at a very early time. It's during the second game Prompto remembers that now is as good a time as ever. Taking the two presents from his bag is a bit of a hassle as he's trying to keep Noct's gift inside. He does remove the chocobo plushie, putting it on the bed.

“Why am I not surprised you kept that plushie.” he hears the playful tone in Noct's voice making him look over the shoulder catching the look between Iggy and Gladio. “You really do love chocobo's don't you?” Prompto looks back at the plushie with a solemn nod that would have looked polite if he wasn't grinning like crazy.

“Absolutely. Can't think of anything cuter, except maybe a baby chocobo.” He stands up from his bag holding the two gifts. “That said, uhm.”

Prompto bites his lip. It had seemed like a really good idea at the moment and he already had them out, he just couldn't help suddenly feeling a bit odd to do this. He takes a few deep breaths, squares his shoulders, and turns around. He's too nervous to see Noct's eyes move to the gifts, or Gladio nudging his shoulder, or Iggy's knowing smile.

“So uhm, I kinda feel weird right now. Had this whole speech planned but seriously can't remember the most of it so I'll just go right at it.” There's a blush on his cheeks when he walks towards where the others are sitting. When he sticks out the presents to Iggy and Gladio he sees them startle.

“This is to thank you guys. I know that if you guys hadn't vouched for me with the King there was no way I would have been permitted to be Noct's friend in the way I am.” His eyes flutter to the floor, his cheeks burn up. Seriously why are they not accepting it. He knew it was weird. “It's not anything big just something to show my gratitude.”

He feels the gifts being taken from his hands and he lets out a sigh of relief. Finally he dares to look up at the two older guys who are just staring at the gifts. There's only a moment to wonder why the both of them shoot Noct a glance but after he gives them a nod they quickly unwraps the gifts.

To his amazement it's Iggy who tears it off and Gladio who tries to save as much as possible claiming Iris is going to love the cute Moogle design of it. Both of them still when they look at the photo albums in their laps. In them are photo upon photo of the past few months, the few times Prompto was allowed to see them at work, the previous trip, between those Gladio's album has images of places and people he cares about, Iggy's has photo's of dishes and some menu's of Insomnia's better known restaurants.

“Well, I have to say this is indeed not a gift I am used to get,” Iggy mumbles slowly “it's thoughtful.” Prompto grins, recognizing a compliment when he gets it.

“Hey,” Gladio buffs up “I gave you a new set of training daggers.” Iggy just sends him a look as to say 'and what of it' Gladio resigns and turns to Prompto. “I love it kid. You really have a good eye.”

“Thank you.” The blush that burns his cheeks makes him want to hide his face behind his hands.

“Now I'm really happy you chose to keep the plushie I gave you.” Shock is the least of Prompto's feelings right now.

“Wait.. the plushie...” he points at the chocobo on his bed “you gave me that?”

Gladio nods. “Had some issues figuring out what to get you but Iris said you had a thing for them so when I saw it during a visit to a chocobofarm during a training weekend I had to get it for you.” he balks out a laugh “had to get Iris a Moogle plushie for the advice.”

“And that trinket you have attached to your weekend bag was my gift to you.” Iggy smiles “Poorly this also means neither me nor Gladio won our bet.”

“Bet?” Prompto feels his mind swirl. So they only gave the presents as a part of a bet.

“Yeah,” Gladio nods “once we saw all the things you had gotten we made a bet about what you would keep. I was certain to win for there was no way you would part with a chocobo, but then you also kept that trinket.” he gets a thoughtful look on his face “Nyx didn't blab did he?”

“Nope,” Prompto shakes his head “not a word. He had a look on his face when I put them aside when we were boxing up the rest but he didn't say anything.”

After that they play one more game before Iggy and Gladio calling it a night. Prompto just smiles at them taking the photo albums with them, letting out a sigh when the door closes.

“Were you that nervous about them not liking your gifts?” there's a hint of jest in Noct's voice “You know they would have liked anything you gave them. They are great guys.”

“Oh,” Prompto jolts up “no, it's not that. It's more… uhm.” he rubs his neck, jumps to his feet, and walks towards his bed. He quickly takes Noct's gift out. “I didn't want them to be here when I gave you your gift. That's all.” Prompto blushes.

“Look, I know you don't like these kind of holiday's but I do and I really wanted to give you something. Had planned to leave it on your desk before class...” he shrugs apologetically.

“But then Nyx showed up and you didn't have time to put it in your bag.” understanding is written all over Noct's face. Understanding with a smidgen of guilt.

“Well no. I had it in my bag, I just didn't want to give it to you with anyone around.” Prompto blushes. “I know they don't mean anything by it, but there were so many guards that day and I just know they would have seized it and opened it just to make certain and I want you to be the first to see it.” carting his fingers through his hair he feels his blush intensify. “Right. Like that doesn't sound suspicious.”

“It doesn't. Not to me.” Noct steps up too Prompto and puts his hand on his lower arm rubbing his thumb in circles over the skin. “I know you and it sounds thoughtful” Prompto looks up to meet Noct's eyes seeing something shine in them he isn't certain he sees correctly.

“Plus,” at this Noct shyly looks away “I might have had something for you as well that I did not want to give to you in front of others. Although in my case Iggy and Gladio know about it as I had them get it for me while I was in class.” he blushes. “even made the money to get it myself by working part-time in a kitchen and helping out dad and Iggy at the citadel.” Noct walks over to his own bag and pulls out a horribly bad wrapped gift.

“Iggy wanted to help me wrap it as it's a bit of an odd shape but I insisted on doing that much myself.” He walks back to where Prompto's standing. “Equal trade?”

Prompto simply nods sticking out his gift with his one hand and accepting Noct's with the other. They sit down on his bed and start unwrapping. In the end he couldn't say exactly how Noct responded to his gift because he was way to busy squealing over the pretty chocobo tin in his lap.

“Open it dude. There's more to it” Noct gives him a bashful smile.

When he pulls open the lens he sees it's cleared of the chocolates to make room for the lens he wanted. Once recovered they both laugh about Prompto knocking them to the floor in joy.

#diem writes #ffxvalentines #promto argentum #Noctis x Prompto

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minimaeng · 7 years ago

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“The Stars Don’t Get Lost At Night” Interview with Kwon Mina

Everyone gets lost in life. "The Stars Don't Get Lost At Night” is girl group AOA member/actress, who also wants to find her own path, Kwon Mina's first book. The book includes sentences chosen by the writer, which had become her guiding stars every time she gets lost in the midst of youth.

First of all, the writer confessed in the book, "One day, I would like to tell my story not as a singer or an actress, but as the 25 year-old Kwon Mina." She revealed true stories that have never been told anywhere for the first time, making it even more meaningful. As a young lady who is running towards her dream, by fearlessly telling her own story, thought she might not be the best at expressing herself, she sends warm, cheering and comforting messages to the people in their blossoming youth.

Q. The transformation to a writer feels fresh and welcome. Is there perhaps a special opportunity/reason that properly you to write a book? A. I've always kept a diary. I think this is how I started writing. Sometimes I have the feeling "So I actually have these types of thoughts." I want to show people not the perceived, outer me but the inner, unexpected me. In that sense, I think these essays show a lot of who I really am.

Q. "I would like to tell my story not as a singer nor an actress, but as the ordinary 25 year-old Kwon Mina." Casting aside the image of a glamorous star, I'm curious about what kind of a person Kwon Mina is. A. When I'm not on stage, I'm just a really normal person. Compared to my peers I'm more like a kid, but sometimes I act more mature than people of my age. I'm still lost, wandering and a bit clumsy, and I'm not that different from my peers. As a 집순 (a person who likes to stay at home), I'd prefer staying in to going out. I feel like I can do a lot of things when I'm alone.

Q. I can see handwritten words and photos that are the works of yourself. You seem to enjoy doing things with your hands. Are you interested in calligraphy and photography in your free time? A. I like taking photos of landscape and peculiar objects. I think I have taken a lot of photos if the sky recently. I always think only photographs remain, and that's why I take a lot of photos. When I take good photos I would feel a sense of satisfaction and pride for no reason. Even when I'm talking on the phone, I would scribble on a piece of paper as I talk.

Q. Regarding the theme of "small quotes that are like guiding stars in your life," what would be the quote that has guided you? A. "Love and work, work and love. That is all of life" - from the movie < Intern > This sentence is simple, but it came to my mind. I ask myself a lot of questions. If work and love are everything in life, I do not want to miss out on either. So whenever I'm tired and exhausted, I use this sentence as my guide.

Q. Through reading Kwon Mina's worries in her youth, I can get a sense of young people's thoughts. To you, what kind of a stage of life is youth? A. Rather than the timing of youth, I think it's youth when you think of yourself as "youthful." Regardless of age, when you have that passion and enthusiasm, isn't it exactly your youth?

Q. When do you want the readers to read the book? A. Ummm... actually, no matter when you read it, I think it's very kind of you to give my book a read and I'm very thankful. If I have to choose, I think it's nice to read it when you are just getting tangled up in your thoughts, or maybe you can read it lightly when you have some time to fill. (Laugh) I wish I could make it easy, comfortable and relaxing to read.

Q. You said, "I'm still looking for my path both as an AOA member and as an actress." I'm curious about your future plans. A. I would like to challenge different genres in the future. Therefore, I would like to show you a lot of images different from my current image. I think this book could be a starting point.

Interview Source Ⓒ Translations

#aoa #kwon mina #data: news #data: translations #the stars don't get lost at night

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shazyloren · 7 years ago

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The Dragon Club: Chapter 4 - Wine and Dine

Summary: Jon Snow is an online blogger who gets an interview with the sort after Daenerys Targaryen, the Editor of Valyrian, a multi-million dollar fashion magazine. He'd heard so much about the silver-haired and silver-tongued woman and he running of her business; he would have to be smart to get anything more than five minutes. Will he be safe walking into the Dragon's lair or will he get thrown to the Lions?

Link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/12018519/chapters/27290892

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Daenerys glared at the TV as E! News reported the sensational news of Jon Snow's blog. It was two days after their fiasco interview and Dany woke up seething after receiving phone call after phone call from news outlets wanting her comments as had phoned Missandei (who was back at work and healthy) to cancel her meeting that day and that she was going to work from home on editing the March issue of Valyrian (February's was coming out in two weeks so she needed this one in the back by the end of the week). But she couldn't concentrate as she received a message from her brother telling her to turn the tv on.

"Sensational news coming out of Valyrian magazine today as respected Journalist, Jon Snow, releases a candid and honest report of meeting Editor-in-chief and owned Daenerys Targaryen. It comes just a week after the scandal of former employee Doreah's reports that the multi-millionaire owner is an 'evil piece of work'. The following reports contains flash photography..."

Dany grinned her teeth as she seethed at the TV.

'A Hot Head at best, vindictive at worst; Daenerys Targaryen's attitude to simple questions over the scandal that rocked her magazine is to dodge furiously and lash out as her volatile nature supersedes her ability to talk like a normal adult' The Journalist said as he wrote a 2000 word essay on his impressions of the Editor-in-chief. It wasn't all bad for the 26 year old however, there were high praise for her love of fashion that says she claims comes from her mother, Rhaella, who is seen with her here at Elton John's New Year's eve bash last month. He also says she has a fine taste in literature, which can be seen by her extensive knowledge on Chaucer..."

Daenerys turned the TV off immediately. She'd been told by Missandei that his blog was the number 1 trend on twitter currently and he was receiving praise for his piece from critics. 'Hot head at best' he'd said of her; he had been very rude of her which she had expected; just not like that. She wasn't a bad person; and Doreah was not her fault; she had just lashed out at the wrong time and now Valyrian was going to pay for it. There would be boycotts from people buying her magazine.

"Stupid Bastard" She grumbled as she threw all her paperwork on the floor in anger. "I'm not a horrible person, I'm not a Horrible person"

She suddenly found herself trapped; wishing she was allowed out of her home into the open world. She wanted to breath in the cool January air, she feel the breeze as it rolled over her skin, not to feel the papers and books of her work or look at the workings of people's articles on her computer screen. She sighed, it's no use. She just sunk back into her desk chair and began to pick up the papers which she had thrown down.

Throwing herself into her work; it wasn't until her cleaner and cook let themselves in a 17:00pm that she realised she needed to get ready for her dinner guest that would be arriving soon. She closes down her files and tidies the papers on her desk. She nodded to her helping hands and retreats to her beauty closet to get ready for the company that will be joining her. She stares at the dresses and fabrics in front of her; Wang, Versace, Chanel, McQueen, Chloe and many more. She can't help but be drawn to a white number which was a custom made dress her mother made for her many years ago.

"You're the one" She whispered as she began to change; her pale milk like skin revealed from underneath her jumper and trousers she'd been wearing for the day. She took the white dress out and smile. A figure hugging bardot topped dress which had a fashionable cape added. It had a slit up to the thigh in the left side which when paired with silver strappy heels meant she looked a lot taller than she actually was. Getting into the dress and calling her cleaner in to help zip it up at the back she fashioned it with a dragon choker.

She heard the doorbell ring then and after putting her hair into a fashionable ponytail; she walked to the apartment entrance where her five guests were waiting already, her eye catching that of her assistant Missandei who looked like she'd got changed in her car from running the office for a day. A low whistle sounded out from one of them. "Hello all"

"Thank you for having our company once again Daenerys"

"It is my pleasure, Sir Tyrion" She smirks as she pokes at her guests recent knighthood from the Queen of England. "Dinner will be ready soon, please come into the guest lounge where we'll have some win"

Dany often thought of her life three years previous. When she'd spoke of her wish to leave her father's company and start her own fashion magazine he'd thrown her out of their house with £2000 only and two bags of clothes. She only could have the internet on her phone from wifi spots in Cafe's so she started an online blog called 'Valyrian' but laid it all out like a magazine and when people came into the cafe's she'd tell them about the site and got people interested. She soon got ads on her site and within the first year she had a backer willing to invest in a printed version of her site. And that had been Tyrion Lannister, Sir Tyrion.

"It's been a bit of a strange day for you I could imagine" He commented as they entered the Lounge, a large smile present on his face. "Hot-headed at best and Vindictive at worst, what did you do to the poor man?"

"Didn't give him the information he wanted" She commented back, immediately going for the wine that her cook had laid out for them. "A rather inquisitive soul; a love of classic literature. I thought the interview was going well and then the issue of Doreah came up. I panicked and threw him out"

"A shame, one would have thought you'd have learnt to keep a cool head by now but alas you are your father's daughter" Varys spoke to her. He'd been apart of her father's business for 10 years as his right hand man but had recently fallen out with him. So now he runs communications in Daenerys' instead. Another reason her father despises her.

"I am not my father" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"And thank god" He laughed as he too sipped the wine.

"If it had been me; I'd have locked the door and told him he wasn't allowed to leave until he promised to write a fluff piece" Daario, her friend of 2 years spoke. She'd met him while working in the Coffee shops, he'd been an aspiring weightlifter and now worked the nightshift of security while Jorah, who was drinking the wine quicker than he could pour it on the sofa, did the days. Daario had always had a thing for Daenerys and three or four times they'd ended up in bed together but for her it had been nothing more than a fling.

"And what would that have accomplished? Jon Snow is a well respected Journalist he'd have just told the world she tried to coerce him into lying and her reputation would've suffered even more" Tyrion was a very intelligent man, and he nearly always had a solution for when things went pear shaped. "You need to be smarter than him"

"Do you propose something?" Daenerys was intrigued.

"Twitter was flooded with opinions and mislead comments about this article, you need to get on social media. Make a twitter and ann instagram. People need to see you as a person who is human and not a cold hearted bitch you've been portrayed as in the papers. Yes you have a temper on you; but it does not come out often"

Daenerys blinked. She'd never bothered with social media herself. She'd keep an eye on competitors and used it in that sense, but her own account? "I am unsure about this, Tyrion. If I do this now; people will know it's a direct response to his article!"

"Good; people will realise that you've gone to great lengths to actually go about doing something. They'll become intrigues in you and your magazine and the prints will increase once again. Let's do it now while we're flowing on wine as to not lose our coverage, where's your tablet?"

And so for the next thirty minutes until dinner was served all six of them, Daenerys, Tyrion, Daario, Missandei, Varys and Jorah argued over what to put on her account as handles and display pictures. There was a lot of back and forth but after much disagreement Daenerys decided to name her account 'The Dragon Club'. "The Dragon Club? You mean the horrible name you tried to give this dinner us six have once a week?"

"It's not a horrible name; it's good" Daenerys retorted as she finally signed up to twitter and Instagram. "Now what do you propose I do? I don't take photos, I'm not particularly funny. This was a horrible idea!"

"You are very dry, Daenerys. Tweet the journalist; if he's on there" Daario suggested and for once Tyrion agreed with him. "Be nice obviously, but follow me first"

Daenerys followed her own company and then followed the five guests in the room who were online (Jorah didn't bother). She then searched for Jon's account and saw the last thing he tweeted 'Thank you for the positive feedback on this article, it's good to report honest subject matter'. She mentally found herself getting fired up again and she didn't think she could contain it as she stared at his words on her tablet screen. But taking a deep breath she replied to his tweet. 'No legacy is so rich as honesty'.

It was at this that she was interrupted by her cook to say dinner was served. Her mind was all on talking to her guests about their lives; Missandei had just moved in with her boyfriend Jacob, also known to most as indie singer Greyworm. Tyrion had recently lost his wife Shae and was talking of how her parents had come to Tyrion with some of her stuff they wanted him to have. Varys had received an invite from Dany's brother Rhaegar for Elia's 40th birthday party next week and Jorah's niece had made him wear fairy wings at her 11th birthday party. They were all getting along swimmingly and it wasn't until they moved from the dining room back into the guest lounge that she saw lots of notifications on her phone. She'd have to turn them off later.

Checking to see all the fuss, she saw Jon had replied to her and followed. 'Shakespeare' was all he'd said. But it was still enough to make Daenerys smile.

Perhaps she may be able to sway him round.

#jon snow #danereys targaryen #jon x daenerys #jon x dany #jon x dany fanfic #fanfic #jonerys #jonerys fanfic #jonerysfanfic #got #game of thrones #au #modern setting #the dragon club

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olivia-rabbini · 5 years ago

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Essay to show a formal tone and knowledge of artists/research

The artist and photographer JR is a big inspiration to me as his work has a consistent political message which conveys meaning in many ways to many different people around the world. He started his artistic journey when he was just 15, writing his name on walls and doing graffiti around the streets of his hometown in Paris using his city as a canvas. Using subways tunnels and roof tops, he presented his first side walk gallery at the age of 17, framing photos he took and pasting them on the street walls.

His work inspires me to try and put a message behind the art I create, as he is controversial and allows his audience to question the topic rather than to just to sit and admire. JR has used his art to portray a fair and real story wherever he goes which reflects the actual truth of people and a country, often against popular opinion portrayed in the media. I love his photography and black and white portraits which I have taken inspiration from for my most recent work about communities in London. This project was originally based on the events following the fire at Grenfell and the photography of Tom Cockram, where he captured the faces of people most affected by this tragedy and created a short film. I also wanted to convey a message by painting these people’s portraits and taking pictures on a disposable camera of tower blocks and council estates to go with them.

One of my favourite pieces is called ‘Hold Up’, an enormous print pasted on the side of the Tate Modern in 2008. This temporary piece by JR, a then unknown street artist with concealed identity, can be seen as a big statement only exhibited here for a short time which makes the impact even bigger. It consists of a young black man holding a gun-like structure up to his shoulder, looking along it through the lens making direct eye contact with his intended audience. The strap hanging from the man’s hand bears resemblance to a type of gun used in assassinations or poaching. The circular frame at the end of the object allows the audience to be intimidated as it is not only pointing directly at them, but the protagonist also looks at the audience, so everything points at them.

Upright positioning of his arms angling the object downwards causes a threatening sense as it looks like he is about to shoot. All these aspects signify immediate danger and violence which is why this piece creates such a massive impact from the outset as it is so big making the audience feel helpless and small. At first glance, we assume it’s a gun due to his pose and hand positions around the object looking like he’s ready to ‘shoot’ or setting up to do so.

Also because of the strap hanging from his arms, it reveals the imagery of a typical rifle perhaps used in gang to gang violence and murders/crimes being committed. The object however is not a gun but a camera, which we begin to see as we look longer at the main subject in the image. JR has created this illusion of a gun to play on how people first interpret someone’s look and actions and make them question why they assume what they do on a first impression. The idea of a gun links to gang violence/culture, the figure holding what is actually a camera is a young black man; does the viewer’s misreading of the image reinforce racial stereo types? The large figure is isolated, standing alone on the side to the Tate Modern in central London, visible to all, not just the public visiting the gallery. This reinforces stereotypes and peoples first assumptions; the camera actually could create a sense of innocence and safety heavily contrasted to the person’s first impression of a gun creating an atmosphere of danger and threat.

In my work currently I’m focusing on communities in London such as age, gender and culture, and how we integrate. A gang is like a group or community some might say, and an escalating problem is knife crime and drug related incidents which have been gang related, especially in London. I would like to incorporate this into my work similarly to how JR uses topical controversial issues for the basis of his photographs and placement of his pastes.

JR started out with his friends when he was just a teenager leaving a mark on his society with graffiti work painted along tunnels around Paris and in the subway, all very public spaces. He started off as a street artist which led him to take photos and document his life through a camera which he found on the Metro subway. Like me, I started off by using a digital family camera, and then as iPhones progressed my photos got better, however I love going back to always having a disposable camera on me, capturing moments that could be gone in a second, the uncertainty of what photos I’ve taken looms when I go to pick up my prints. JR would paste these photos on the walls of the streets and buildings around Paris and framing them in colour to make sure that the public did to not get them confused with advertisements and take them purely only for modern art .

It was known that Israeli and Palestinian people have been in a constant conflict over land and religion for many years affecting thousands and devastating both countries, however, it can be argued that this is only portrayed in one light in the media and doesn’t often get major coverage. So JR went to see if he could change people’s perception and again, without being part of the media and just a simple art project. He held an illegal art exhibition called ‘Face-to-Face’ which was about guessing who is Palestinian and who is Israeli. This involved pasting huge close-up photographs of people’s faces on the border between both countries, the portraits were of people doing the same job but from the separate places within the conflict and on opposing sides. Where the conflict lies between them, they were pasted next to each other and the public were asked who was who? It quickly becomes clear that you cannot tell which person is from which background, and that people are the all same regardless of colour, job, religion, wealth and status.

“Women are Heroes ” – another project by JR this time started in the favelas of south America. It brought him all around the world pasting huge portraits of women in different places. His project made a huge difference to favelas, as on the side of houses females’ eyes and faces were pasted creating a completely different image from deprivation, poverty, misogyny and corruption to, full of culture and busing with life. He changed the media representation of these places, which were once disregarded and never talked about, to quite the opposite. The project encouraged more and more women to come forward about abuse they have suffered and trauma they have had to endure in their lives and once again he brought people together and changed perception.

JR he makes a huge social statement wherever he goes and where ever he leaves his mark causing people to question their beliefs and what they know, how the media interferes with what we see. I would love to make an impact like this with my own art and photography – he inspires change and questions beliefs and opinions which I try to hint through what I do.

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kitkatdana · 8 years ago

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Random questions

1. Do you bite or lick ice cream? Now that I’m thinking about it... i don’t know

2. What is home to you? I don’t really have one.

3. What was the last lie you told? My mom told me to go to bed early because I need to sleep more and I said I would

4. Does everyone deserve the truth? Yes - I don’t know why I can’t deliver it though.

5. What is the creepiest toy ever made? idk?

6. Describe a moment in which you did something unacceptable in a bad situation. Uhhhhhh

7. List two things that are more easily done than said. (No, I didn't mix them up.) I... don’t know.

8. When was the last time you worked really hard to achieve something? I worked really really really hard to be a drum major. Not many people really get what it takes to earn the position and to maintain it.

9. How many all nighters have you pulled? Maybe 1-2. I normally make myself go to bed by 3.

10. If humans didn't evolve to laugh or smile, how would we express our happiness instead? a good-old-fashioned thumbs up

11. How many romantic "things" or "flings" have you had? shhhhhhhhh

12. What is your paradise? honestly? being in the car alone. it’s the only space i have to myself, which is why i really really really hate how close i live to everything (which yes, is a very annoying thing for me to hate. i’m sorry).

13. What is your favorite background noise? (Ex. Water dripping, people talking.) soft rain

14. How many hearts do you think you have broken? 0 i’m too ugly for that shit

15. What is the most important thing about electronics? What does this say about you? They keep us connected and keep us curious and informed about the world around us. This just says that I’ve heard way too many engineers talk about why they chose their field.

16. Why do people care about celebrities? Do you care about celebrities? Because they see themselves in them maybe? I don’t really (that’s not to say I haven’t before)

17. What is the most annoying thing someone can do to you? Act like nothing happened when they did/do something that I literally can’t stop thinking about for days (hahahahahahaha in this case months)

18. Do you overexaggerate? What are the pros and cons of this? Yes. pros: i... don’t know. cons: i lie i guess in a way

19. Have you played any instruments before? Which instruments? I’ve played the clarinet for 6 years whoop-whoop

20. Do you like taking selfies? Why or why not? no i’m fucking ugly

21. List 3 things you like about yourself? literally nothing. i guess i’m an okay writer when i actually try but i don’t like sharing my personal writing with other people.

22. What is the best advice someone has ever given you? to push myself do things that i didn’t think i could or had the guts to.

23. Do you have what it takes to raise a child? Why or why not? no... probably not. i’m way too easily distracted and easily get emotionally worn out

24. How do you cheer yourself up after a bad day? i don’t. i just disassociate

25. When was the last time you felt awkward? today when came home and had to tell my parents that i lost my wallet that had my id, car insurance card, and debit card in it :)))

26. Are you introverted or extroverted? Or a mixture of both? introverted

27. What constitutes a good friend? they listen and know when to give you space

28. Would you rather have a lot of friends to hang out with or just one best friend? one i guess idk

29. In a regular day, what do you not want to hear? people fucking chewing that shit’s nasty

30. What is your dream job? an astronomer or an astronaut.

31. Is it better to be lazy but smart or hardworking but unintelligent? hardworking but unintelligent

32. What is a truth about yourself that others find hard to believe? some people don’t believe me when i tell them that i’m a dumbass

33. What have you always wondered about the other gender? idk

34. Which fantasy world would you like to visit the most? idk

35. Describe the worst friend you have ever befriended. this one girl... oh my god. she was very lowkey mentally abusive and didn’t like when i would hang out with other people and would even talk bad about me because of that?

36. Imagine that you have switched bodies with someone you don't know. You can't switch back. What do you do? send them an apology letter for getting put into such a disgusting person’s body

37. If you found the recipe for immortality, would you sell it or would you burn it? burn it. can’t let that shit get in the wrong hands

38. What is the most important, applicable class you have ever taken? psychology in 9th grade was pretty cool. so was current events.

39. Name the last book you read. the great gatsby for the millionth time jesus

40. Imagine that you are unable to express emotion. How would this affect your world? just me personally? not much.

41. When was the last time you made the first move? literally never oops

42. What is your opinion on electronic music such as dubstep or trap? thanks i’m good

43. What was the last movie you watched? i haven’t sat down and watched a movie since i saw star wars in theaters in december

44. Do you like and appreciate your life? i appreciate aspects of it at times but i know that i personally have no purpose or significance.

45. Do you like and appreciate yourself? nope

46. When was the last time you cried? less than an hour ago

47. What are you scared of? heights; any fucking bug; snakes; rejection; debt; disappointing others

48. What is the most embarrassing, cringe-worthy thing you have ever done? live

49. What are some of your hobbies? playing the clarinet; crying; writing; photography

50. What is a superficial yet annoying mistake you constantly make? idk what that means. i guess i’m really bad at remembering names? does that count?

51. Are you a good friend? What makes you a good friend? If not, what makes you a bad friend? i am a really bad friend bc i’m never there for people when they need me and always take shit too personally and let it effect my relationships

52. Do you honestly learn from your mistakes? yes

53. What have you learned the hard way? that not everything will just come to you - some things, you have to go out and get. don’t miss an opportunity to do something with someone you love. always say goodbye to those you love. never take someone’s appreciation of you for granted.

54. What is the most important thing to have in order to attain happiness? support

55. Which medium do you use for expressing your artistic emotions? (Singing, writing, etc.) writing and tbh this sounds so nerdy but playing my instrument i am able to add emotion to music to make it beautiful when i really want to try

56. Are you a creative or a logical thinker? logical

57. What is the smartest thing you have ever done? idk i guess my psat scores were ok

58. What is your ideal meal? a sandwich & some lemonade

59. What is the worst thing someone could do on a date? insult you

60. Do you like animals? Which kind is your favorite? i like most animals. dogs.

61. If you could turn one legal thing illegal, what would it be? open-carry

62. Do you have any guilty pleasures? idk. eating chocolate?

63. What is the best thing that the internet has ever created? the ability to share your writing and art

64. Do you like playing video games? Which video games? i guess every once in a while with my dad and brother i’ll play mario kart or something simple like that.

65. What is your opinion on beauty in today's society?

66. Are you a morning person? When do you usually wake up? sure - 7-7:30 (more around 9 over the summer)

67. Do you have a favorite Disney movie? Character? uh CARS!????

68. Would you rather live in the city or in the countryside? countryside - i prefer silence

69. Would you rather live near the ocean or in the mountains? mountains

70. What are the best things about winter? i can excuse staying in bed all day because it’s cold

71. What scares you most about the future? isolation and failure

72. What makes you feel old? watching movies from my childhood

73. How many hours do you spend on the computer or phone on average? idk i don’t keep track

74. What are some of your New Year's resolutions? to get over this feeling that’s been dragging me down for years

75. What is your life story in 6 words? the fuck i don’t know bitch

76. Describe yourself in one word. worthless

77. What bad habits do you do? i don’t eat for long periods of time and then eat really shitty food once i finally do; i sleep for only 3-6 hours a night; i take online quizzes and tags rather than writing history essays that are due the next day

78. What genre of music do you listen to? anything but country and metal

79. Most prominent childhood memory? my first dog dying

80. Imagine if you had an older brother. If you already have one, what is it like? If you don't, how would this change your life? idk he’d probably be mean and annoying and hate myself even more

81. Spirit animal? idk

82. Do you believe in horoscopes? not really but they’re fun

83. What is the worst advice you've ever been given? to smile

84. List the 3 most important people in your life right now. my dad, my friends, my crush, idk, there’s more than 3 i guess

85. Favorite memory of your family. we were in nyc on christmas eve at rockefeller center, about to go to dinner, and it started snowing. it was the most fucking magical and beautiful thing i’ve ever experienced, to be quite honest. idk why. but. it makes me nostalgic.

86. What do you look for in a relationship? mutual respect and love

87. Do you have a role model? Why or why not? yeah a few

88. What is your opinion on social media? i mean i use it a lot so i guess i like it.

i89. Are you a pessimist or an optimist? i’m pessimistic about most things but optimistic about dumb things

90. List some things that you think are overpriced? college; fresh food

91. What is your worst memory or creepiest experience? too many to count

92. What superpower would ruin the world? is immorality one

93. What is something you swore you would never do when you grew up, but you did anyway? procrastinate

94. What lessons have you learned from movies and which movies were they? about time taught me that love - whether it’s platonic or romantic - is important to express, and that you will regret not doing so as you grow older. it also taught me to not take life for granted (but it obviously hasn’t stuck) and that there is beauty in everyday things.

95. If you could travel anywhere, where would you go? antartica

96. How do you approach people? awkwardly

97. What is your opinion on first impressions? they’re important but you can recover if you try hard enough

98. What are some things you did as a child that you no longer do? idk

99. What languages can you speak? english

100. What do you think society will be like in 30 years? fucked up

101. What do you do on your lazy days? sleep and watch star wars

102. What ended your last relationship? shhhhhhh

103. Favorite food? don’t really have one

104. What is the most terrifying dream you've ever had? well i had a series of dreams for a few months where i would come out to my crush and they would literally run away or ignore me or tell me i was wrong

105. When was the last time you got seriously angry? today at myself for losing my wallet

106. What was the last friendship you broke? i can’t remember i’m really bad at keeping friends i’m a jerk

107. Do you have any pet peeves? loud chewing; talking loud right into my ear; idk; lots

108. Who was the last person you gave a hug to? my dad

109. When was the last time you got seriously stressed? right now

110. What part of your personality do you want to change? all of it

111. Who is the most positively influential person in your life right now? one of my pals

112. What is your biggest motivation? death

113. What did you want to be when you were little? astronaut

114. What are some things that you are good at? nothing

115. What is one thing you want to be good at? writing & doodling

116. What distracts you the most, especially when you're trying to work? social media and text messages

117. How important is privacy to you? very

118. If you could create one social norm, what would it be? idk this is a weird question

119. What's the craziest lie you've ever told? i can’t remember

120. What story do you like to tell about yourself at parties? i don’t go to parties i hate social shit

121. What is the lamest thing that you have seen someone do? some of these questions are really weird.

122. What is the stupidest thing you've done to impress someone? lots of things

123. What is your morning routine? wake up, eat breakfast, brush teeth, change, make lunch, leave

124. What's the last thing you did that is worth remembering? idk

125. If karma was coming back to you, would it help or hurt you? hurt very badly

126. What is your opinion on playing "hard to get?" it’s really fucking annoying

127. What are the pros and cons of straightforward? pros: u get ur point across. cons: u may not get the outcome u’d like.

128. What do you consider "leading" someone on? do NOT get me started on this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

129. Are you the friendzoner or the friendzoned? hahahahahaha the friendzoned

130. What do you admire most about your friends? their beauty and intelligence

131. What do you admire most about your family? their lack of anxiety

132. What is your opinion on "going with the flow?" i wish i could say i was able to do that but nah

133. Do you enjoy talking or listening? both

134. When is it time to end a friendship? when it becomes emotionally draining, or you aren’t gaining any benefit from the conversations you have with them

135. What is the worst excuse you've ever come up with? idk

136. If GPA didn't matter, what courses would you have taken? yearbook x3809423

137. What are your favorite baby names? idk??

138. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? this morning

139. What instantly ruins a conversation? memes

140. Biggest turn ons and turn on offs. idk i like it when people are kind and smile and make eye contact for a lil too long and don’t mind being close. i hate when people are rude and talk over someone else

141. Biggest disappointment. myself

142. Do you have any self-restraint? nah

143. When did you last do something outside of your comfort zone? idk

144. Prized possession(s)? letters from a pal and my haim/borns t-shirts

145. What is your opinion on second chances? i’m not sure

146. Text or call? i like calling some people - hearing their voice makes me feel warm or safe. other people i prefer texting because it gives me less anxiety and i can think about what i want to type out.

147. What do you like about the 21st century? that’s a weird question idk

148. What advice would you give to yourself 5 years ago? get some sleep, child

149. How organized are you? most of the time i’m organized but lately i’ve been a complete disaster

150. Favorite mode of transportation. my car

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