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meruz · 4 years ago

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i was gonna draw tonight but i dropped my tablet pen and the barrel of the pen broke off and flew somewhere underneath (??) my bed (?) and now i cant find it so I’m just gonna answer asks before bed instead. just some art asks and more mentions of infinity train LOL

What program and brushes do you use when making your art?

@ravki hi! part of this is in my FAQ but i’ll say it again anyways LOL: I use photoshop CC and have used photoshop for pretty much....my whole art career. I’ve dabbled in clip and paint tool sai in the past but photoshop is my true wife, we eloped away from her awful father adobe many years ago and are very happy together.

as for brushes... I should prob put this info in my FAQ too lol,... my default brush set is actually free to download here! Tho I will say I also use steve ahn’s storyboarding brush sometimes and lately i’ve been using shiyoon kim’s brushes A TON. Shiyoon’s cost a couple bucks but they’re super worth it imo

How do you choose colors?

This is kind of a difficult one to describe from scratch but hmm.... I’ll put it this way. Generally when I go into coloring or painting something I already have some colors in mind. Like for a certain piece I know I want a bright green, or a magenta, or a dark blue in certain areas. A lot of the time I know a mood I want. So I’ll start with that core color tone and build around it. I’ll use an example from a recent piece

So you can see here that the first color I accessed was that bright cyan. So I start with that bright cyan and then bring in its “friends” in the form of analogous colors (shown below on the far left)

greens greys etc. THEN I know I want the characters to stand out against all the blue so I start laying down warm contrasting colors for them (middle group). the mat under them is orange, skin tones are warm, ryans flannel is red etc. then to get them to work together I work more cool colors into the shadows and slightly warmer (not too warm because its a cool img overall so in this case, greener LOL) colors into highlights.

hope that makes sense? for me choosing colors is a lot about story and composition. If you know what you want to say, the mood you want to create, where you want to go, the path to get there becomes a lot clearer imo.

Have you ever considered making an art book?

I have! But I don’t think I currently have enough...original illustrations for one LOL? Not that an art book has to be all original work but if I were putting fanart in an art book...at that point I’d just make a fanzine. I’m making more original work lately though so maybe this year....? Who knows. For now, I do have a sketchbook up on gumroad. Hoping to do one of those next year too.

Any tips for keeping background drawings from getting super stiff, especially since things like interiors have a lot of straight lines?

This is a really interesting ask. Really great question that I don’t think gets asked enough - forgive me if I get a bit art school here but I drew up some examples.

First I think we have to investigate the assumption that straight lines make things stiff. That seems true on an instinctual level and certainly proves to be true very often But I don’t think its actually the straight lines themselves but the sort of arrangements and compositions they tend to dictate. Take this for instance.

pretty big difference, right? there’s a couple things that make a composition feel stiff and one of the most significant is lines that are perpendicular and parallel to the frame. it feels locked in and solid, like bricks. but the moment you shift these angles even a little the composition instantly becomes more dynamic because our innate senses of weight, gravity, and directionality can sense movement.

But it’s not just diagonals let’s take this one step further

when lines meet and terminate together those tangents can flatten and lock space so the best way to solve this is with overlap and complete intersection, forms continuing past or behind each other feel more layered and less like a flat mosaic... again, even in the simplest line drawings. So how do we apply this to a background?

ok I drew this really fast so its potentially not the best example but I think the idea is there. This space isn’t even particularly deep, it’s basically a room, a doorway, and a hallway behind it, and we’re not seeing that much of any of those things LOL. but when you draw an environmental object like a doorway in a way that lines up with the perpendicular and parallel lines of the canvas you’re automatically flattening it and making it look rigid.

and when you create tangents with objects and characters you flatten the space around them and make it difficult to tell what is actually in front or behind or if they’re on the same plane.

GOD I HOPE THIS MAKES SENSE. Anyways. avoid those things and you’ll instantly have less stiff bgs no matter what kind of bg you’re depicting.

I wanna mention however that this isn’t to say a stiff bg with flat space doesn’t have its purposes.

sometimes you want to create parallels and tangents. it can make characters feel closed in, trapped, regimented, part of a routine, etc. it’s also great for making a composition look ornamental (especially combined with symmetry).

directors like wes anderson can even use these compositional elements to make images feel uncanny or harrowing! its very versatile. I think the important thing is to just be aware of when you are making something rigid and when that’s the last thing you want to do. conscious choices.

Can you speak Tagalog?

@lemuelzero101 I can! BUT NOT VERY WELL LOL ;;; both my parents are from Visayas! but they met and had me in the states lol so I’m pretty American born and raised. We go back to visit family on occasion but not regularly. My tagalog is mostly absorbed from listening to relatives at parties lol and my parents speak bisaya at home so I’m marginally better at that. Sorry to any filipinos out there hoping I’d be better educated, I’m like a little baby...

I do love meeting and talking to other filipinos online though, I grew up in an area that was relatively diverse but the asian population was small and the filipino population basically non-existent. I was like one of maybe 2 filipino kids in my highschool of 2000.

Apart from infinity train what shows are you watching now? Have you seen jujitsu kaisen?

Man this is gonna sound so boring but I haven’t watched a lot of tv lately. It’s not really part of my daily routine. Let’s see... I was sort of watching Amphibia, Craig of the Creek, and the new Digimon Adventure 2020 but I keep falling off watching those for one reason or another. Also there’s a lot of episodes, it doesn’t feel like something I can just binge and be done with.

The last thing I binged was Succession. I want that show and Euphoria back so bad, when I’m done forcing all my friends to watch Infinity Train im cancelling my HBO subscription until Succession and Euphoria return so they know exactly what I’m on their list for LOL.

I have not watched jujitsu kaisen but I’ve kept up with some of the sakuga news (I keep up with anime industry news and production info like x5 the amt i keep up with actual anime) for it and their compositing/editing looks dope. I’ve read the manga actually LOL or at least part of the beginning. I wasn’t super keen on the whole finger eating thing. Also to be honest I kinda feel like its the new Bleach and I never particularly cared about Bleach. Characters look nice enough tho. I wholeheartedly support jjk fans.

Thank you! Thank you @keznodzieja! <3

And thank you anons who don’t watch infinity train LOL...it’s always nice to hear when people enjoy my fanart despite not knowing the source material because it lifts a little bit of the “oh god am I being annoying???” fear off my chest. But also I think you should watch infinity train because it’s really good I have no reservations recommending it.

#ask #GOD so much to say everyday #now to respond to e-mails and hit the hay at a responsible time

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thelastspeecher · 4 years ago

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Spirit Touched - Chapter 1: Little Prince

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 AO3

Uhhhh so this is the first time I’ve written and posted something for ATLA, and of course it wound up being because of a fanart of a fanfic that I adore. Basically, yesterday I saw this art drawn by my pal @agent-jaselin. And that art appeared to apply one of my all-time favorite tropes (de-aging) to one of my all-time favorite fics (Salvage, by @muffinlance). And dagnabit, I...got inspired.

So, without further ado, here is my interpretation of a theoretical Zuko being de-aged after Chapter 8 of Salvage. Enjoy.

——————————————————————————————

Praying to the spirits for guidance was a mistake. Hakoda could see that now. He pinched the bridge of his nose in a vain attempt to dispel the headache already forming.

This is what I get for thinking the spirits might make things easier. Their actions are rarely convenient for us mortals.

“Bring him to Kustaa,” Hakoda said after a moment. Toklo nodded and hurried for the healer’s room, his friend in his arms, buried in a pile of furs. Bato looked at Hakoda. He raised an eyebrow silently.

“That’s new,” he said. The casual tone made Hakoda’s headache pound in full force. Bato was treating this as just another matter of fact. Like seeing the former Prince of the Fire Nation reduced to a toddler overnight was just as common as…

Hakoda’s head hurt too much to even think of something that was common.

“Yes,” Hakoda finally said. “It is new.” He was struggling to align the grumpy teenager of yesterday with the toddler he’d just seen drooling in his sleep.

“How could this have happened?” Bato asked quietly.

“I asked the spirits for help last night.” Hakoda scowled. It was help he’d desperately needed, after Zuko had broken down in front of him and renounced his crown, maybe even renounced his own nation. And it was help he was obviously not getting. “Apparently, they didn’t want to make things easier.”

“The spirits work in mysterious ways,” Bato said. “It’s best to trust in their judgement. Eventually, you’ll understand why they’ve done…this.” Hakoda eyed his second-in-command.

“Since when are you so spiritual?”

“Since meeting the bridge between the spirit world and ours,” Bato said flatly.

“Fair enough.” Hakoda sighed. “I should go speak with Kustaa.”

“I might be best if you were there when the little prince woke up,” Bato agreed. He thumped Hakoda on the back. “At least you’re good with children!”

-----

Unlike every other day since he’d recovered from his illness, Zuko didn’t wake up with the sun. If he didn’t remember how much his own children slept at this age, Hakoda would have been concerned. He sat in the infirmary, having a hushed conversation with Kustaa while Zuko continued to snore. The sight of a toddler swimming in furs was painfully cute and reminded Hakoda of when Sokka was young.

“I’ll be able to get a better examination done once he’s awake,” Kustaa said in a low voice. “But from what I can tell, he’s perfectly healthy.”

“He’s a toddler,” Hakoda said.

“A healthy one.” Kustaa glanced at Zuko. “By my estimation, about four years old. So, almost out of the toddler years.” Zuko rolled over in his sleep, mumbling something. Kustaa and Hakoda held their breaths. Zuko didn’t wake up. “From what he’s told me, he didn’t get that scar until a few years ago, so I’m not completely sure why he still has it.”

“The spirits are testing me,” Hakoda moaned. Kustaa chuckled.

“No, Chief. The spirits are testing all of us with this stunt.” He sighed and leaned back. “Now would be a good time to have a waterbending healer, to examine his spirit and chi. But the odds of finding one of those…”

“Aren’t good unless we stumble across a Northern Tribe ship,” Hakoda said, finishing the healer’s sentence. Kustaa nodded. There was movement from Zuko’s pile of furs. Hakoda and Kustaa looked over. A small hand fought its way out, followed by a head. Zuko’s regular scowl was replaced by confusion as he stared at Hakoda and Kustaa, who most likely seemed larger to him than they had yesterday.

“You’re up,” Kustaa said calmly. Zuko shoved away the furs he was buried in. His eyes widened at the sight of his body. Hakoda grimaced.

There was a split second of dumbfounded silence before the screaming started.

-----

Kustaa wasn’t sure whether he preferred Zuko like this or not. On the one hand, it would be difficult to run the ship with a literal toddler on board. But on the other hand, it was much easier to handle Zuko. He could literally be picked up and carried somewhere else if needed.

“This doesn’t fit right!” Zuko whined. Kustaa glanced over at his young charge. Zuko had insisted on dressing himself in the smallest shirt they could find on the ship. That smallest shirt came down to past his feet.

Then again, so will everything else. Kustaa beckoned Zuko to come. Zuko scowled but walked over. Kustaa fought back an amused grin at the firebender’s toddling gait. While not as severe as it would be for someone younger, it was still evident.

“Nothing is going to fit right until either we adjust clothes to fit you or purchase ones already in your size,” Kustaa said. He adjusted the shirt as best he could by pinning it up and wrapping rope around Zuko’s waist to act as a belt. “Now that you’re dressed, we need to go see the chief.” Zuko’s eyes went wide in horror.

“No! I’m not going outside like this.”

“Everyone knows what’s happened to you,” Kustaa said, getting to his feet. He took Zuko’s hand. It was small and warm. “Most of them saw you already, and the rest were informed by either the chief or Bato.”

“…Fine,” Zuko grumbled. Kustaa led him out onto the deck. The moment eyes landed on him, Zuko dropped Kustaa’s hand to hide behind his legs.

“Wow, you’re barely older than the babes we left at the South Pole,” Panuk remarked. Zuko didn’t move or speak.

“I think he’s adorable,” Toklo said firmly, marching over. He crouched down to Zuko’s eye-height. “I always wanted a baby brother.”

“I’m not a baby,” Zuko snapped. At his high-pitched, youthful voice, Toklo beamed. “I’m sixteen.”

“Four,” Kustaa corrected. Zuko scowled.

“Either way, that’s not a baby.”

“Aw, no need to pout,” Toklo cooed. Zuko’s scowl deepened. “It’ll be fun having a little kid on board.”

“Will it?” rumbled Aake. “We only let men join the crew for a reason.” Zuko let out a small squeak as Toklo lifted him up and held him out for Aake to see.

“Try saying ‘no’ to this face,” Toklo said. Aake’s deadpan expression didn’t change.

“No.”

“Were you saying ‘no’ to Zuko or ‘no’ to saying ‘no’ to him?” Toklo asked. Aake shrugged and continued to sharpen his spear. Zuko squirmed in Toklo’s hold.

“Let me go!” he snarled. He broke loose, falling to the deck with a soft thump. Kustaa waited for the tears that would come from a toddler being dropped. But Zuko didn’t cry. His eyes were glistening in a way that suggested he was holding back tears, but he remained otherwise stoic. Kustaa filed this observation away for now. He walked over to Zuko and pulled him up.

“The chief needs to talk to you, remember?” he said. Zuko nodded silently, allowing Kustaa to lead him to Hakoda’s cabin.

-----

The moment they set foot inside the cabin, Kustaa could tell Hakoda was going to struggle with not seeing Sokka every time he looked at Zuko. At least Bato was there to help mediate things.

“Take a seat,” Hakoda said. Zuko toddled over to the chair he normally sat in. After a moment, he climbed onto the seat with obvious difficulty. Bato stifled a laugh. “Zuko, we’re not sure why the spirits have done this to you.”

“Probably because they hate me,” Zuko muttered, crossing his arms.

“Well, no matter why you’ve been turned into a toddler, the fact of the matter is that it has happened to you. Generally, we don’t allow children your age to be on our ships.” Zuko paled and opened his mouth to make his case. Hakoda held up a hand. “Given your…extenuating circumstances, we won’t be dropping you off at the next port or something like that. Who knows, maybe you’ll wake up tomorrow sixteen again. Until we have a better understanding of your condition, including how long it might last, you’ll be staying on the Akhlut. Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Zuko said with a nod, visibly relieved.

“Good. Now, just because you’ll still be on board, don’t expect things to stay the same for you. You won’t be required to do any chores on the ship. If you want to help, you can, but the crew has been instructed to stop you from overexerting yourself or doing something that might hurt you at your current age.” Zuko’s eyes boggled. “Additionally, you’ll be sleeping in the infirmary with Kustaa for the foreseeable future. It will be more comfortable for you.”

“Understood,” Zuko mumbled.

“Another change is that you will be expected to do what a child your age must in order to remain healthy,” Hakoda said. Zuko tilted his head curiously. “In particular, you will have to take naps.”

“What?!” Zuko shrieked.

“We can’t have a cranky, overtired firebender on our wooden ship,” Bato said. Zuko crossed his arms, scowling.

“Those are the major changes. We will adjust things as we see fit,” Hakoda said.

“Okay.” Zuko fidgeted in his seat, an abrupt reminder to the men in the room of how hyperactive toddlers were. “Um, about my clothes…”

“Go see Panuk and Toklo. They offered to try to cobble together something for you until we can make port,” Hakoda said. Zuko ducked his head.

“Thank you.” He slipped off his chair and left the cabin, his head held high in an attempt to maintain any dignity. Once the door closed, Kustaa looked at Hakoda and Bato.

“He’s not going to act like a toddler if he can avoid it,” Kustaa said. “He’s almost certainly going to resist the reduced workload and naps.” Hakoda nodded.

“I agree,” he said solemnly.

“This won’t end well,” Bato said, shaking his head. “There’s a reason we wouldn’t normally have someone his age on board.” There was a loud ruckus from the deck; clattering, heavy footsteps, and Toklo’s voice.

“Come on, Zuko, it’ll look so cute!”

“That,” Bato said, “is the reason.”

-----

Hakoda begrudgingly agreed with Toklo’s assessment. Zuko was cuter than he had any right looking, walking around the ship with a blanket draped over his shoulders like a cape. According to Toklo, Zuko had begun shivering while he and Panuk were working on finding something for the new toddler to wear. Toddlers tended to get cold easier, and Hakoda supposed that being a firebender might make Zuko more vulnerable to cold as is.

“Are you hungry yet, little prince?” Panuk asked. Zuko looked up from his fumbling attempts at making a net.

“Don’t call me that,” he snarled. Panuk patted Zuko’s bald head.

“All right. You hungry yet, Zuko?” he asked. Zuko’s stomach rumbled loudly. “I’ll take that as a yes.” Panuk got up. “Come on. Let’s fill you up with sea prunes.” Zuko got to his feet and eagerly followed Panuk. Hakoda watched Zuko toddle across the deck and to the kitchen.

“You’re getting soft, Chief, I can tell,” Aake, standing nearby, said quietly. Hakoda looked at him. Aake sighed. “But I’m getting soft, too. We left when Sitka was about that age.” A weary and wistful expression settled on Aake’s face. “I miss my son.”

“I miss mine as well,” Hakoda said quietly. Suddenly, Zuko burst onto the deck, his arms full of sea prunes, running from Panuk.

“Hey! You don’t get all of them!” Panuk protested, coming onto the deck as well. Zuko merely sped up. Hakoda and Aake’s eyes widened as they realized the former Fire Nation Prince was giggling as Panuk chased him. Zuko’s lighthearted, childish peals of laughter filled the air. He rushed belowdeck, his blanket still wrapped around his shoulders. Panuk followed. A silence fell. After a moment, Tuluk, who was swabbing the deck, spoke.

“Well, that was adorable.”

-----

Hakoda expected Zuko to hide belowdeck, embarrassed by behaving like a toddler. But Zuko returned to the deck after a while, seemingly unaware of how childish he had acted. He walked up to various crewmen in an attempt to do some of his old chores. Each time, he was turned away. His regular scowl settled on his face, chubby with baby fat.

“Can’t do anything,” Zuko muttered as he stalked around the deck, his blanket trailing behind him. He finally sat down next to the mast, pouting.

“It’s good that you can’t do anything,” Hakoda said, walking over. Zuko looked up. “Leaving a task in the middle of doing it doesn’t usually produce good results.”

“Why would I not complete a task?” Zuko asked. He crossed his arms. “I’m not really a child, I can focus.”

“You’d need to take a break for your nap,” Hakoda informed him. Zuko’s eyes widened. “I saw you yawning just now. You’re tired.”

“No, I’m not!” Zuko said, jumping to his feet. He shed his blanket cape. “I won’t nap.”

“You agreed to take naps.”

“Only if I needed them. I don’t. I’m not tired.” Zuko’s argument sounded eerily like those Sokka made as a child.

“There’s nothing for you to do anyways,” Hakoda pointed out. He reached for Zuko’s hand. Zuko darted away before he could be grabbed. Unfortunately for his millionth escape attempt, Aake was nearby. Aake picked Zuko up as he ran past.

“Let me go!” Zuko said, twisting in Aake’s grip. “Let me go!” A breath of flame escaped from his mouth. He suddenly stilled. Aake handed him over to Hakoda. Zuko didn’t make a peep as Hakoda carried him across the deck and into the infirmary. Kustaa looked up from the book he was reading.

“Is it time for my nephew’s nap?” he asked. Hakoda nodded and set Zuko down.

“Sleep,” he said firmly to Zuko. “That’s an order.” Zuko nodded, visibly cowed.

“Yes, chief,” he mumbled. Hakoda turned to leave. “Sir, I apologize for firebending earlier,” Zuko said suddenly. Hakoda looked over his shoulder at the toddler.

“You firebending on accident wouldn’t have anything to do with agreeing to nap, would it?” he asked.

“Uncle says that sleep works in concert with meditation to control your inner fire. Children who are too young to know how to meditate only avoid burning down their house by taking…naps.” Zuko scowled slightly. “That’s the excuse he gives for being so lazy.” Kustaa chuckled softly.

“Judging by what happened on deck, your uncle might be right,” Hakoda said, feigning a casual tone. Zuko nodded. “Sleep well, Zuko.”

Hakoda poked his head into the infirmary after he had checked on the rest of the crewmen. Some of the crew felt Zuko’s current size was an improvement. Hakoda could see where they were coming from. Zuko was yet again buried in a pile of furs, his minute arms wrapped around Scuttles.

“He went down almost right after you left, chief,” Kustaa said quietly. “I didn’t even need to make him any tea.”

“Hopefully he won’t argue against naps in the future.” Hakoda continued to watch Zuko sleep. The toddler let out a soft snore. “It’s foolish to expect that he’ll ask for a nap, though.” Kustaa nodded.

“I would agree with that.” Zuko rolled over in his sleep with another snore.

“Let me know if anything happens,” Hakoda said.

“Of course,” Kustaa said. He picked up another book, opened it, and began to read. Hakoda left the infirmary, closing the door behind him as softly as he could.

#Spirit Touched #ATLA #Zuko #Hakoda #Bato #muffinlance #agent-jaselin #(idk how to tag the various OCs eek)#I wrote quite a bit more but that stuff will probably wait until more chapters of Salvage are posted #just to keep things as in line with the fic as possible y'know #(I haven't been this nervous about posting a fic in a while hhhhhhhhhhh)#my writing #my stuff #fanfiction #speecher speaks

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autisticcassandracain · 3 years ago

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I have many thoughts on the weird phenomena in the DC fandom and the Batfam fandom specifically where probably the majority of people just straight up. haven’t interacted with the source material. and almost all of those thoughts can be summarized as ‘lmao that’s weird and mildly concerning’.

and because I’m annoying I will list them all here right now <3

1. To preface this post, I mean, obviously, comics are inaccessible as all hell, both in the disability kind of way and the ‘you need to understand the concept of hypertime to fully comprehend the DC timeline’ kind of way. Because of this, even if you don’t have a disability that prevents you from reading comics, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to look at the amount of comics you need to read to have even a base understanding of a character and go ‘no thanks <3′ and just enjoy fanart and fanfic in a vacuum. Ultimately, this is fandom, this is supposed to be fun, it doesn’t really matter.

2. That said, it’s VERY weird to me that the majority of this fandom just straight up hasn’t interacted with the source material, and moreover, that it’s considered rude to tell people that they should do so. It’s especially weird considering the amount of fanon-only fans I’ve seen who straight up have a superiority complex over canon. The idea that it’s gatekeeping to tell fans of something to actually interact with canon is just. so weird, and a fundamental misunderstanding of what ‘gatekeeping’ actually entails.

3. But honestly I’m less interested in discussing the ways in which canon and fanon fans should interact with each other (personally, I think it would be helpful to create separate tags of some kind, but that’d require quite a big overhaul of the current fandom state) than in figuring out how this actually happened in the first place. On the one hand, it’s obvious; long-running superhero comics the way DC writes them have made themselves so thoroughly inaccessible that most people are simply too daunted to even try. Most media has a cohesive beginning and end (or at least, a planned end somewhere). Comics just... don’t.

But I do think it says something that, even among people who are clearly interested in the characters (since they have, you know, entire blogs about them), the effort to get into comics just seems to be too much to even bother. This really doesn’t bode well for the future of DC Comics. Obviously, I am no expert on anything at all ever, but I’d personally be surprised if DC survives beyond the few decades, at least in its current form/without a big overhaul.

4. But on the other hand, I don’t think the confusing state of DC Comics is the only thing to blame here. Fandom has a well-known problem with reducing any character down to archetypes to more easily ship and write fic/make content with. This problem is particularly prominent in fanfic, which, if you read enough of it, you’ll eventually start seeing not just the same tropes and trends, but essentially the same fics over and over again. And not just within the same fandom; everywhere, or every large fandom, at least.

Fanon Batfam is entirely built on a bunch of those tropes; insecure/depressed sadboy Tim, team mom with optional hidden trauma/emotional problems Dick, bad boy with a heart of gold + sadboy combo Jason, abused sadboy Damian/angry easily-villified-for-fic-reasons monster Damian, good dad Bruce for found family fic and bad dad Bruce for angst fic, etc. This all culminates in a found family dynamic that’s generic and malleable to whatever fic the writer wants to write.

(This isn’t getting into the ship fic, which I avoid like the plague because the vast majority of it is incest, but I’d bet real actual money that the tropes in those fics fall under what is often preferred by the Migratory Slash Fandom.)

By having a decent excuse not to get into canon (the inaccessibility of comics) and a, by now, well-established fanon fandom, many fans feel free to use the batfam fandom as essentially an excuse to write whatever fic with reduced archetypes and tropes they personally feel the itch to write, without having to bother with even consuming a canon. This is compounded by the fact that canon itself is often contradictory and frankly bad, meaning that whatever interpretation of a character you want/need to go for your fic is at least theoretically backed up by canon (for example, you can just as easily cast Bruce as an abusive shithole dad who his kids need to get away from as a loving father figure who cares deeply for his children), which you can always use as a defense if people question your characterization.

5. This focus on fandom trends and tropes over actual creativity or care for the characters is also visible in the way bigotry manifests in this fandom; namely, in literally the exact way you’d expect. The female characters and characters of colour are shuffled to the side, non-existent, vilified, and/or reduced to harmful stereotypes.

Barbara is probably the one I saw the most often in fanfic, but usually just as ‘Dick’s girlfriend’, and even then, she was often vilified for Dick angst (especially in fics about examining Dick’s trauma from his canon sexual assault; Kori also often gets the short end of the stick in those). After that, probably Stephanie, who fanon fans don’t really seem to know what to do with, so she’s basically just there as comic relief waffle girl, most of the time, though sometimes she can be used to either further Tim angst or further vilify Tim, whatever the fic calls for. Cass has gotten included more in batfam fics as of late, likely in response to critiques of fandom racism for leaving her out, but again, it’s clear people don’t actually know what to do with her. She’s often reduced to a racist stereotype of a quite, stoic therapist for whatever guy du jour needs it. That, or she’s in Hong Kong and just not there. Duke especially gets left in the dust in fandom, usually just being non-existent, but when he’s there, he’s almost always nothing more than the straight man for the actual fun characters to play off of. Talia probably has it the worst, though, and almost universally gets vilified by fanon stans in order to write sadboy Damian.

All of this is extremely predictable behaviour and falls entirely in line with general fandom misogyny and racism; ignoring or vilifying women and characters of colour, or using them as very minor characters at best. The only two characters of colour who aren’t regularly left out of fic are Dick and Damian, who are both also conveniently the two characters most often drawn and written in a whitewashed manner. In addition, there’s a real trend of demonizing Damian in fanon fics where he isn’t written as an abused sadboy, which I’d argue is in no small part due to fandom racism, considering Damian’s behaviour is in no way as bad as Jason’s, who doesn’t get anywhere close to the same demonization and gets woobiefied instead. I also find it convenient that Damian is probably the batboy who receives the most vilification in fic, when he’s the most obviously non-white of the batboys they’re willing to acknowledge.

Fandom often cries for more diversity in canon, only to ignore the diversity already there and focus on the same generic white guys. The batfam fandom is a brilliant example of this.

Which is not to say that fandom racism and misogyny isn’t present in the canon parts of the fandom (and canon itself); it absolutely 100% is. But I’ve found that canon fans are also more likely to like and care about at least one of the characters I’ve listed as ignored/vilified, and are willing to create and consume content for them, whereas fanon fans... aren’t, really. I’ve never seen a fan of fanon Cass the way I’ve seen fans of fanon Dick, for example. Obviously, this could just be by coincidence, or I’ve just surrounded myself with people like that, but it’s been a trend I noticed. Racism and misogyny is present in every part of this fandom and should be addressed as such, but I feel like it manifests the most blatantly in the fanon parts of this fandom.

(I’d also recommend the articles Migratory Slash Fandom’s Focus and Beige Blank Slates, which expand more on the type of fandom racism I think is especially prominent in the batfam fandom, as well as literally every article in the What Fandom Racism Looks Like series.)

6. All this leads me to conclude that the majority of fanon fans don’t actually like the characters all that much; they’re convenient excuses for them to participate in fandom. Which I also think is, in no small part, a reason why so many of them react so negatively to being told to pick up a comic; they came to this fandom specifically to consume it as a fandom, because they wanted the fandom experience without having to consume a canon.

This is not a phenomena unique to the batfam fandom (again, see the Migratory Slash Fandom), but it does fascinate me. While fandom is often said to be an experience focusing on transformative art, I think it’s also safe to say that, especially as fandom has become more mainstream, an increasing amount of people are looking to it less as a way to engage with their favourite pieces of media, and more as a type of media in and of itself. I think the reasons for this are similar to the reasons mass media entertainment like the MCU are so popular; you gain a lot of enjoyment out of it with very little risk involved.

By consuming the same fics of the same characters (or the same archetypes) over and over again, you are rarely at risk of being challenged or even disappointed. It’s often very clear right from the start whether or not a fic will appeal to you, and if it isn’t, it’s easy to just look for another one. It requires less emotional investment than most other types of media, even ‘popcorn media’ like the MCU - or, yes, DC Comics. It’s safe, it’s enjoyable, it’s comforting, like McDonalds, but just like McDonalds, it’s ultimately bland and unsubstantial.

7, TL;DR. Ultimately, I don’t think it’s like, wrong to enjoy the fanon version of the batfam without wanting to engage with canon, and I certainly don’t think it’s okay to harrass people over it. But I do think it’s in large part based on a desire to interact with fandom rather than other pieces of media because people are scared of being let down by those pieces of media (or worse, just uninterested in actually thinking), which is mildly concerning.

#long post #my posts #infodumping #btw i say this as someone who also has trouble consuming much more than popcorn media/fanfic due to emotional exhaustion #but it's not a healthy habit and it's something people can and should try to break out of #also obviously this isn't about EVERY fanon fan specifically so if this doesn't apply to you specifically great then move on

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gamebunny-advance · 3 years ago

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Hm...

Thinking about that time someone literally copied one of gijinka designs for social clout, then just flat out denied it when I called them out.

At the time, I had buckled under the belief that “I’m probably being paranoid. There’s so few notes on this thing, and it’s so old, there’s probably no way they would have seen it.” and I had deleted the call-out.

Honestly, I still get really aggravated when I feel like someone is “stealing” from me (and it happens a little more than you’d probably think), but I just don’t feel justified in calling anyone out because it’s mostly with fanart, and neither of us are profiting from it, so neither of us have anything to lose or gain from it except a bigger number next to a little heart icon.

I guess what upsets me about it is them getting recognition for something that isn’t theirs. I put in the work to make the thing, but they get to knock it off and get even more recognition from it? That’s just unfair. But in a way, all fanart is like that, right? It just seems more okay to do it when it’s a character from a company or something, because they’re not really being *hurt* by fanworks but hurts when fanartists copy other fanartists because we occupy the same space and thus are in competition with each other.

Tangent aside, my feelings basically boil down to: “Am I really gonna start drama with someone for saying they stole the design of a character neither of us own”? At the time, I’d decided, “no,” so I just kinda let it go. There really wasn’t anything for either of us to lose or gain by pushing it further.

But I recently saw them getting called out for other shit, so I got reminded of that incident.

I 99% believe that they stole the design from me, but because they made their design more “woke” and maybe because I didn’t watermark my original one, that somehow made it “okay” for them to do.

I don’t really wanna start shit now because it’s been over 2 years since it happened, but I would just feel a little better if the “proof” was out there. I’m not gonna repost their art here, but if you go to my main blog, @gamebunny-color-sp and search “kirby character design”, I’m sure you’ll find what I’m talking about if you’re really that invested in this tale of mine.

That said, I am going to talk about the differences between the two like you’ve seen theirs already.

Now, I’ll concede that puffy sleeves/shorts is a kind of obvious thing to do for a Kirby gijinka. He’s a round ball made of smaller balls, and those very easily translate into “puffy” features. And big ol’rubber boots is another easy way to translate his feet. I’m not gonna be mad at every Kirby gijinka that has puffy sleeves and boots.

But why the cape? No Kirby forms really wear a cape unless you wanna count Meta Knight, but he wears his very differently. My reasoning was that, besides the hat, I wanted him to have something that would show his copy ability. It’s actually a carry-over from an even earlier version of the design I’d made where I actually played with that idea.

But you know, a cape still isn’t an *uncommon* design choice. It’s basically a staple of the hero archetype, so whatever. A cape doesn’t necessarily mean that they got the idea from me.

But what gets me, is the yellow stripe motif. I don’t think there’s *ANYWHERE* that Kirby is associated with yellow stripes, or stripes at all for that matter, and yet (un)coincidentally, both of our designs have them.

When I first started making gijinkas, I really just did whatever I wanted without too much concern for if it actually fit (arguably, I still do that *cough*bigtittyrob*cough*). You can see that in this old timeline I had made, chronicling my iterations of this design.

Why was my first thought to give him blue accents? Who knows. But it’s also where the yellow stripe on his cape started and had carried over to each new design, just because I liked it and thought that it still went with the yellow star motif that I’d added. So for me, it was just an evolution of my bad design choices getting better.

But, if you didn’t already start with the stripe motif, why would your Kirby have stripes at all? And it’s not like stripes are uncommon. I realize that. But there’s just no logical progression to it unless you just happen to think in the same stupid ways that I do/did. If you wanted to accent the cape, wouldn’t you just add it like a border, like I did with my first 2 designs? Or add more star motifs to it? Why the stripes? And why add 2 except to make it seem more different than mine? There’s other little things, but I think my point is clear: there were just too many “coincidences” for this to not have been a case of plagiarism.

Like I mentioned earlier, I’m coming out with all this because the person in question got called out on a pretty vicious forum site, so they’re probably dealing with a lot right now. They’ve basically deleted/private all of their social media accounts, so whatever ‘clout’ they’ve gained from my design, and possibly others’, just up and disappeared, but I don’t feel any catharsis in that because that really has nothing to do with what happened to me. And you know, the person who did it is younger than me (I’m 23), and this happened literal years ago. They probably just didn’t know any better at the time and were still in the mindset of “stealing is fine if I add positive representation” like a lot of kids still have these days.

I don’t really wish ill will on anyone that does me wrong. I just want things to be set right, but given how long it’s been since the incident, I’m probably never gonna hear, “Yes, I stole your design. I’m sorry.” from them. My catharsis is in now standing my ground and saying, “Yes, my design was stolen, this is why I think so, and even if I’m the only one who cares, at least it’s out there.”

I gave in back then because I didn’t have much confidence in myself. I thought I was wrong because I know I can get over-emotional and that I was too small to be seen by anyone and thus couldn’t be stolen from. But I feel like I know my worth a little more now, and I’m not going to let this happen again if I see it. At the very least I’ll blog about it vaguely like I’ve done today to let off steam.

#my moral of this story:#don't steal people's stuff because you want social clout #i think representation is important #and i love seeing reinterpretations of characters #i'm gonna try to participate in bla/cktober this year and you'll probably see a little bit of that from me #but make stuff from your own heart #or credit the artist you're taking from #stealing sh*t just because you wanna be more 'woke' doesn't justify it #an aside #*cough*he'slikethatbecausehischestisaboutaswideashishead.*cough*#*cough*oneideawastohavehimflatchestedbecauseheliterallyhasnocleavage*cough*#*cough*orhasallthecleavageifyoumeasurethedistancefromtheedgeofhischesttohisnech*cough*#*cough*butatthetimeiwasalmostexclusivelydrawingmasculinecharacters*cough*#*cough*ijustwantedonecharacterthaticoulddrawboobson*cough*

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wakaoujisenhime · 5 years ago

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Hello! This one is gonna be so cute! Another one for Kiri and Tetsu again. This time separate. What if they had a crush on a girl in their class who has a cat quirk. The class decides to have a movie night. And about half way through their crush falls asleep on them. And they discover something. She quietly purrs when she sleeps. After the movie they wake her so everyone can go to bed. She’s in their lap by then, carefully moved. And they finally confess to her. She happily accepts of course. 😍

A/N: Can you guys imagine just how hard it is to find cute Tetsu fanart xD ...this boy has almost no fanart whatsoever (or maybe it’s just me who doesn’t know where to search xD). ANYWAY I hope you enjoy this piece of fluff for our two boys!

Tags: Kirishima x reader ✅ Tetsutetsu x reader ✅ SFW ✅ fluff ✅ confession ✅

image/art source: Kirishima -> Twitter ; Tetsutetsu -> Pixiv (art by kongxwall)

━━━━☆ ━━━━☆ ━━━━☆

Let’s rewind it - Kirishima x reader

“How can (Y/N) be so cute...?“

“Hm? Did you say something?“

Kaminari looked at his red-haired friend who seemingly just noticed that he had spoken his thoughts aloud. Instead of answering him, Kirishima just shook his head and tried to hide his blushing cheeks from his friends’ curious gazes.

No matter how much he tried to twist and turn his words, it was very obvious that he had feelings for you.

Kirishima always fought with himself when it came to the question of whether he’d confess. For him the thought of a boy being honest about his feelings was the manliest thing there ever was, but the possibility of you rejecting and avoiding him in the process was a much greater risk he wasn’t ready to take.

But what he didn’t know was that you actually felt the same way about him. Sadly you were stuck with the thought that he only saw you as a friend and nothing more.

Having Kirishima on one side who was too afraid of losing you and having you on the other side who constantly labeled herself as nothing more but a friend was at first quite the amusing sight for your classmates, but now it was just sad seeing such bubbly personalities beat themselves up over nothing.

And that’s why they came up with the movie night.

Your friends forced you to sit next to your crush which made you more anxious than embarrassed. The reason behind your anxiety was your quirk which resembled Tsuyu’s in a way – to put it bluntly, she was a frog and you were a cat.

The sole problem with your quirk was that whenever you got too excited you’d slightly lose control over it which resulted in happy tail wiggling. So all in all you were afraid that you (or better said your tail) would end up showing and disturbing Kirishima.

You wanted to escape, but thanks to your classmates who were pretty much pushing you further towards your crush there was no escape...

——

“Yes punch him that’s what he deserves!“

The moment you put on the movie it was as if your worries never existed in the first place. Your whole class was watching an action movie, ate some snacks and overall had a good time.

But soon your enthusiasm started to take a toll on your body. Your eyelids grew heavy, the times you yawned increased and before you even started to nod off a few times.

Of course the people who sat beside you noticed and Mina (as the good friend she was) gently pushed you towards Kirishima so that you could fall asleep on his shoulder and not hers.

The moment your head touched his shoulder he almost had a heart attack. At first he thought that you were still awake, but hearing your deep breaths proved him otherwise.

Kirishima’s concentration was now fully on you. He figured that this would be a one time chance so not savoring it would be his biggest mistake.

The boy began noticing small things about you which he would never have outside of this situation. The length and form of your lashes fitted you just right, the perfectly formed nose, the beautiful lips ...

Every single facial feature of yours was perfect in his eyes, but there was one unexpected thing that made him blush the moment he had heard it.

She’s...purring in her sleep...?

Considering your quirk it shouldn’t have been such a big surprise, but the fact that you (his crush) were so comfortable in his presence that you’d even purr was the happiest moment in his entire life.

That was at least until you almost fell off his shoulder. Luckily Kirishima caught you before your sleeping form even had the chance to collide with his muscular thighs and wake you up in the process. He ended up gently laying your head down on his lap instead, earning himself a silent whistle from Kaminari.

He enjoyed the situation he was in of course, but the fact that the movie was slowly coming to an end made him so unbelievably sad. Waking you up and explaining the situation was something he wasn’t looking forward to, Kirishima wanted to stay like that instead.

“Kirishima, we’re leaving (Y/N)-chan in your hands!”

“What..? B-But wait I-“

“Ha, that’s on you shitty hair!”

As soon as the credits started rolling the whole class got up and abandoned Kirishima, hoping that at least now one of you would finally make the first step.

He was finally alone with you and thinking that he’d have to wake you from your peaceful nap hurt him more than the thought of having to explain the situation to you. Having your head resting on his thighs while you purred softly with each breath, had his heart beating hard against his chest.

Kirishima needed a while until he decided upon a method to wake you up.

He placed his big hand on top of your head and gently began caressing it while whispering out your name as soft as he possibly could.

“Hey (Y/N)...wake up...please”

After a few gentle strokes you were awake and terribly confused. The movie’s credits were rolling from the right to the left, your head was resting on something firm but soft at the same time while a big hand was resting on your head.

It took you some seconds to realize what was going on and when you did, you almost head-butted him.

“K-Kirishima! I’m so s-sorry for falling asleep on your lap, i-it must’ve been quite uncomfortable, right..?”

The boy looked at you but didn’t listen to any of your apologies, instead he just took your hands in his own and looked deep into your eyes.

Not confessing to you out of embarrassment and slight fear was one thing, but watching you degrade yourself thinking so negatively was another thing. He decided that hating him would be better than you hating yourself.

“(Y/N), stop it. Don’t you dare apologize for something like that. I didn’t mind it at all and if you ask me...I have never been more comfortable in my entire life. In fact...I wouldn’t mind if things like that started happening more often.”

The moment he said that it took you some time to comprehend what was hidden behind those words.

“K-Kirishima...do you li-“

“I have a crush on you (Y/N)! I’ve always had one, but..I was too afraid to tell you. Too afraid of my feelings ruining our friendship.”

The silence that followed was torture for him and it sadly made his fears multiply by each passing second. You on the other hand were simply in disbelief that the person whom you’ve had a crush on for so long felt the same way about you.

“I’m sorry, maybe this wasn’t the right time and judging by your reaction...I-I shouldn’t be expecting an answer.”

Kirishima slowly got up and began walking away in shame while you started panicking internally. There was no way in hell you’d let him walk away after finding out that he felt the same way about you, but how could you stop him..?

The red haired boy had almost reached the staircase when he suddenly heard the iconic starting sequence of the movie you had just watched.

He slowly turned his head and now it was you who looked into his eyes.

You were holding the remote control so tight that your knuckles were slowly turning white, the blush on your face had almost become as red as his hair, the TV behind you was now replaying the movie and you would’ve never expected yourself to say the next thing you just said.

“Since both of us apparently would like moments like these to appear more often...let’s rewind it.“

I like you too - Tetsutetsu x reader

Being the class after the famous class 1-A was hard. You guys were constantly standing in their shadow so of course the urge to compete was greater than anything else.

Some of your classmates attempted to surpass a certain person and some attempted to even take on the whole class, but you were neither.

Your focus was lying somewhere else entirely.

Since some months ago you actually fell in love with your classmate Tetsutetsu. The reason behind your crush was actually quite the simple one.

Your homeroom teacher Vlad King had asked you to bring him some documents after class had ended.

In your enthusiasm, you completely overestimated yourself and went ahead carrying the heavy stacks of paper on your own, soon enough though your body began signalizing you that it had reached its limit. Stubborn little you on the other hand just continued moving on until your legs gave out beneath you and you almost fell face flat on the floor...almost.

“Hey (Y/N), you ok?”

You immediately recognized the deep voice that was calling out to you, so you looked up to confirm your suspicions...and they were right.

The person who had caught you and shielded you from a nasty fall was none other than Tetsutetsu.

Embarrassed by the whole situation you began stuttering countless ‘thank you’s and ‘sorry’s to the silver-haired boy who awkwardly nodded a few times.

When you attempted to resume your walk to the teachers’ lounge though that’s when he blocked your path.

“Don’t tell me you intend to continue carrying these papers on your own...”

Before you could even protest or ask what he meant by that, Tetsu just went ahead and took almost all of them as he started to walk towards the teachers’ lounge.

Since then whenever you needed help with something he’d be the first one to help you out or ask if you were going to be alright on your own.

And that’s basically the backstory to it...

——

“Come on (Y/N) are you even listening to me?”, Kendo asked you silently as she gently nudged your side, her action causing you to jump a little in the process.

“S-Sorry I got distracted for a second, could you perhaps run this by my one more time..?”, you asked with the sweetest tone you could muster.

She let out a tired sigh and pointed towards the TV.

“I asked which team you think is going to win the fight.”

What team..? And what fight?

You were completely overwhelmed by her simple question so you tried to access the situation you were in right now as calmly and undetected as you possibly could.

When you saw your precious classmates all chilling and eating different snacks while all of their gazes rested on your shared dorm TV it immediately clicked for you.

Class 1-B had finally surpassed class 1-A and even if it was a simple maths test, your whole class had celebrated it as if it was some kind of festive holiday. After countless votings you guys decided to organize a movie night.

Upon directing your whole attention to the TV once more, you finally realized that you’ve already seen that movie.

No wonder I was daydreaming…

With a barely audible sigh, you leaned back on the couch and relaxed.

——

Tetsutetsu was so engrossed with the movie that the moment something plopped down on his shoulder he almost threw the bowl of popcorn he was holding on to.

That sudden scare immediately pissed him off.

“Ok, so what the hell do yo-”

His words got stuck in his throat the instant he saw who actually scared him that badly.

Right now he was facing your peacefully sleeping face, but that wasn’t all.

“A-Are you...purring?”, he whispered as silently as he possibly could - afraid that he’d wake you and expose that cute fact he had just found out about you.

Much to his dismay your friend Kendo had also noticed that you were sleeping and had glared at him while whispering the words ‘if you wake her, I’ll kill you’.

After that threat, he made sure that whatever he did, it would be as if he was walking on eggshells.

At first, Tetsu wanted to move you aside, but the sight of you just sleeping and cutely purring away was tearing at his heartstrings.

Thanks to you he just couldn’t concentrate on the last quarter of the movie, the boy was glancing back and forth between your sleeping form and the TV.

And then finally..

The credits!

The silver-haired boy was so excited about the end of the movie that he forgot about you for a moment and let his shoulder slip. Luckily his reflexes were quick enough and he caught you just before your head hit his firm thighs. Moving you back up would be too risky for him so the only way right now, was to let your head rest on his legs.

When all of his classmates began standing up and leaving, he began panicking.

“Hey! Why are you guys leaving me alone? Won’t anyone help me move her, or at least wake her up?!”

His question wasn’t as loud as he’d intended it to be (thanks to Kendo’s warning from before), but even she was as uncooperative as all the others despite being your friend and that surprised him.

In a matter of seconds the two of you were left behind.

Alone…..finally.

You see, Tetsutetsu wasn’t the type of guy who’d show his feelings, especially when he was uncertain if the person opposite of him shared them as well.

That’s how he was with you.

He may be a slight tsundere, but he wasn’t stupid. Tetsutetsu had noticed the slight change in behavior every time he offered you his help or even went up to talk to you. That boy knew that you at least felt something when you were around him and even if he was too embarrassed to say it out loud, Tetsu still couldn’t betray his heart.

“Y’know (Y/N)...that day I helped you with the books wasn’t a coincidence.”

His words were silent. A barely audible whisper. Meant just for your ears and your ears only.

“It may sound funny to you, but...the way you stubbornly challenged your body to keep on moving made me realize, just how strong you actually are.”

His big hand ran through your hair. The touch of his fingers, gentle.

“I’ve noticed the small glances you give me when we’re in class and you just don’t know how many times I’ve actually wanted to return them. Return them with the same affectionate but gentle demeanor as yours.”

One of his fingers brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Hey…(Y/N)...?”

He remains motionless, making sure that you’re still asleep as Tetsu then slowly bends down.

“...I like you”

The boy straightens himself back up slowly in order to make sure that there was nobody in the vicinity that could’ve heard or seen that. Unfortunately, he completely missed the small smile on your lips.

“I like you too.”

#bnha scenarios #mha scenarios #bnha x reader #mha x reader #kirishima x reader #tetsutetsu x reader #bnha fluff #mha fluff #━𝙱𝙽𝙷𝙰 #━��𝙷𝙰 #━𝙰𝙽𝙾𝙽'𝚂 𝙴𝙲𝙷𝙾

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claudiafekete · 4 years ago

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This is another ordinary story of “how xxx fandoms changed my life” -

- or maybe not. you decide. I want to write it down. trigger warning for politics, discussion of sexual violence, mild gender dysphoria It’s also horribly long. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

When I first came to tumblr, I had just graduated from APH. Short for Axis Power Hetalia. I learned about it in the form of manga. For years it was my everything - I learned what fanfic or fanart meant and I learned the basic online etiquette. As I grew in years, it accompanied me.

Until it didn’t.

Shortly after I fell into solangelo.

It’s a fun story, how I picked up PJO years after years of absence. My brother was whining about something written in Magnus Chase. “What do you think the Norse Gods were going to do to Percy that Annabeth was crying?” He demanded. I expressed my confusion. He kept on with his different theories and I made the decision to look it up online later.

My online search of Percy Jackson’s fate soon revealed something unknown to me before: solangelo. The first canon gay ship I ever knew. Therefore, at the ripe old age of 19, I threw myself into this endless hole called “tumblr” for the first time.

It was the most LGBTQ+ friendly place I had ever been. I joke you not. It was also the place where I was taught not only how a healthy relationship should look like, but also how sex should or could be like. You don’t learn anything healthy about sex in Chinese or Mandarin using fandom, at least during the years I was in them. There were rigid 攻/受(roughly translated as top/bottom) stereotypes that everyone rushed to squeezed their characters into them. A lot of time though both person might ship A with B, they wouldn’t interact because one thought A should top and another thought B should top. Their different topping designation resulted in depictions of the characters’ personalities so dramatically differed that you couldn’t recognize them as the same characters. Other than the refreshing relationship dynamics, Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard offered me a chance to take a look at my gender identity. I had known that theoretically non-binary people existed outside of binary gender, but I hadn’t known how one might live as one or describe themselves as one. I’m not trying to claim that Alex Fierro’s story is the only story of non-binary people. I’m trying to say that it was the starting point for me to make exploration and find the label “agender” for myself.

I stayed in APH for 6 years. I had expected to stay in solangelo for longer.

Entered June 2019 with its whispers and anxious demonstrations. Entered folks pouring into streets in Hong Kong. Entered tear gas and facemasks and sticks and a bullet scarcely missing the heart and journalists beaten by police. Entered young students not of age disappearing mysteriously. Entered people dressed in white attacking citizens and not arrested by police. Entered dead bodies that were probably “被自殺 (being suicided)”.

Entered a city falling into the hands of tyrants next to your door, and you didn’t know how to help. You didn’t know what to do with yourself with your clean and spare hands. You were so far away from the frontline, you were angry and helpless and hopeless for that.

It was the first time I witnessed, first-hand, how the Chinese government directed the discussion online, so that it seemed as if there were random mobs who were disturbing the peace of Hong Kong and possibly taking money or being trained by US. “Bullshit. Would there still be so many kids hurt on street if we have received any kinds of training for this?“ Of course, the majority of Chinese people inland wouldn’t hear that. Hong Kong is a former colony. Any calls of outrage toward the present government must be made by disillusioned young people who were unaware of colonization and imperialism.

That was why I took refugee in Good Omens. I needed to run some where to stop myself from scratching myself to blood. I needed to some works for these clean and spare hands to do so that they wouldn’t pick up something destructive, such as a knife.

If the PJOverse fandom had felt the best place on earth, well, the Good Omens fandom lifted me into paradise.

I’ve never seen so much kindness being showed under one tag. The creators and actors were all kind and interacted with the fans in their own ways. We were encouraged to do everything, anything, to build art with it however we liked. We as fans were recognized. We were seen. We were ... cared for. It was overwhelming, in a good way. For that, I would be forever thankful to Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett and Michael Sheen and so many others in the production. I would be forever thankful to artists who liberated body types and freed the ties between gender expression and genitals. I would be forever thankful for the fantastic creators out there.

Would it seem as if I’ve only cherished the mutuals I met in Good Omens fandom? It wasn’t my intention. There are friends I keep in touch long after I fell out of love with APH. There are mutuals I got to know through solangelo and I feel, I hope that we are friends. Everyone who has chat with me I do my best to remember. (Though I do left conversation in weird places, become so ashamed of my incompetency that I do not continue them.)

What I’m trying to say is, as good as the solangelo fandom was, I still ran into biphobic posts here and there. It was only once or twice – but it was a constant reminder that being bisexual didn’t seem “valid” to some of the other LGBTQ+ members out there. Who cares what cis-gendered, heteronormative people said? Bullets that shot from friendly fire hurt the worst.

Besides, with a large and vibrant fandom like Good Omens, it’s easier to feel less alone and more… seen.

Damn right. Even after writing more that 5000 words in English it is still so easy to fall back into the comfortable nest of mother tongue. I can read simplified Chinese characters as well as the traditional Chinese characters I grow up using. There probably will never be getting the accent right but soundlessly devouring words in front of a screen? I excel at that.

That was what’s happening when the days rolled into January, 2020. I flew to US as an exchange student and exchanged long letters with a young Chinese woman I met in Good Omens fandom. I’ve never felt so alone in life. English as in creative writing has never come more naturally for me. The words burst in my head and arranged themselves freely on screen or on papers. I’ve never felt more hopeful about my writing ability.

The days rolled into March, 2020.

The first time my mom told me to come home over home, I laughed. The second time, I frowned. Before she pleaded me for the third time, I had grabbed a ticket.

I hadn’t imagined the disease plaguing China and its neighboring countries would affect the whole world.

You lived the rest of the story. I fled back to Taiwan.

That was where Doctor Who came in. Or David Tennant. Such a strange time. For fourteen days I was the only living human in the house. I watched Casanova – or was it later? Hamlet definitely came before that. Then I could live with my family again. I handed in my homework and wrote in a different language than the people around me were speaking. My parents were working. My little brother was in school. When there was no one to talk to me I either read or watch Doctor Who to pass the time. I fell for Thirteen. I fell for twissy. Falling fast and hard and completely won over by their glamour.

I started internship. There were some small breaks where I could catch an episode or half, but never as much time as before. I dipped into fandom wiki and found that no matter how much research I did, there would always be details I overlooked simply because I could not afford hours watching all the episodes. No matter how hard I squeezed my schedule for time, no matter how much I devoted myself to the series, it would never be enough.

So I gave up, and let it go. For the first time in quite a while, I willingly gave up something for the simple reason of “I want to live a more comfortable life”.

Came summer. Damp air combined with biting heat and piles after piles of biochemical terms made life agonizing. An ordinary kind of pre-pandemic “agonizing” which felt like a luxury in a world that was ending.

Hong Kong fell.

It was bound to happen. Once I heard protestors fought their way into the legislature I knew, for almost an year I knew, nothing good would come out of this. CCP would never allow its subjects acting out of hand. With such open despise to the authority, CCP would take nothing but a full conquest at the end of it.

See where we are now. As long as you’re “interfering” the political climate “inside” China, it doesn't matter which nationality you hold or where you were or how long it has been since you made the statement. “According to the law”, China can come for you. No, better, it can tell your country to hand you over. What a clever empire. What a graceful empire.

What a horrifying empire.

With the news I spiraled down fast. I kept away from the young Chinese woman I was exchanging letters with, I kept away from any kinds of Chinese social media, and the worst of all, I kept away from Good Omens, for it was sweet and kind and hopeful, for it reminded me of a time where fighting seemed to make a difference. I was empty and exhausted and a husk. Something must come out to fill the void. Someone needed to paint me in colors so that the world wouldn’t notice I was fading away.

I was surprised at who took the brush.

After ten years, the first man I ever have a crush on strolled back into my life.

He was over thirty, but I always pictured him in his early twenties. Dark hair, eyes of grey or silvery blue. Loud laughter that sounded like a bark. Swift and elegant. Intelligent. Prideful. Stubborn. I embraced him as I’ve done ten years ago as a little child.

When I looked past him, I saw someone else.

Worn, weathered, with wry humor. Attentive and considerate. Tortured by the world yet never stop giving out kindness. Countless scars. Grey hair unfitting to his age. I didn’t pay him much attention ten years ago. This time, I looked.

Let me introduce you Sirius Black and Remus Lupin, my very first crush and the man who is too much like my last crush.

2020, a month before Fall semester started, I trekked cautiously, timidly back into Harry Potter fandom.

The fandom of August 2020 was very different from fandom of 2010. The lack of author, for one – it became mandatory to denounce the author’s transphobic statement and other bigotry setting. I’m glad that everyone is doing their best to make it a friendly place for minority groups. Though I’m afraid, by making it a white or black situation with short statements and no discussion, it wouldn’t really help people understand why she is wrong in this. However irrefutable the author’s guilt seems to us, it is not something obvious to those who are unfamiliar with the subjects.

But it does feel good to see blogs and fics with the introduction such as “If you support the author’s transphobic bullshit this place does not welcome you”. It feels reliving.

The second was, I found the type of work I’m actively pursuing changed.

Back when I was young – when I was so little I didn’t even know what the word “fandom” meant – I read Character x OFC and some M x M. During the APH period I read an alarming amount of M x M and countless historical AU. When digging through solangelo, beside the canon divergence stories, simple AU like coffee shop grabbed my attention. Coming out stories were my comforts. The best of Good Omens fics were either in canon verse discussing desires, bravery, humanity and mortality, or setting in an AU with the promise of sweet, fluffy endings. Doctor Who almost always focused on Time and Space. Love was twisted and so often tainted by anger. Monster and god were very alike.

I came a full circle back to the Marauder era, and found myself not looking for heroes, but for young fighters struggling desperately in a seemingly hopeless war. I looked for people who were frightened but never, never ever going down without a fight.

I used to find characters and events unfolding in foreign places, now I want characters who are close to what I am or what I want to be.

---

So, that’s it, my grand journey through multiple fandoms and basically a journey of self-discovery. It’s messy, sometimes painful, but always with so much joy blooming along the way.

Something doesn’t change. I’m still obsessed with words. I’m still a sucker for happy ending. I’m still wishing someone will come and love me the way I need to be loved.

Something does. I stop imagining that some magical power will come into my life and solve everything. I stop looking for others to save me from myself. I start believing that though wounds hurt, some of them do teach us to be a better person.

Long ago, I saw my friends and I as rabbits, without proper weapons to defend ourselves. That wouldn’t do. I thought. For my friends I’ll grow into a snake with fangs to protect them. Maybe I have grown into a snake. Maybe I haven’t. But I do hope I won’t stop fighting for those I love, with those I love.

I hope I won’t give up.

#APH #axis power hetalia #pjo #percy jackson #solangelo #tw: politics #tw: sex mention #magnus chase #magnus chase and the gods of asgard #alex fierro #hong kong extradition bill #hong kong demonstration #good omens #doctor who #tw: personal review of pandemic #harry potter #sirius black #remus lupin #hong kong national security law

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that-damn-girl · 5 years ago

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New Nicknames

(Oneshot)

Pairing: Stucky (Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers) (MCU)

Second part of my collection of oneshots/drabbles for Stucky in the same universe in chronological order - His. Could be read as a STAND ALONE drabble since ‘His’ is NOT a series.

Type: Fluff, cuddling.

Words: 1250+

Summary: Steve comforts Bucky as they give nicknames to each other.

Warning: Ignore any sad endings in 'Avengers: Endgame'.

A/N: This is my submission for @writingsoftheloser 's 1.5K Writing Challenge. Congratulations honey, and thank you for letting me participate! My prompt was 'Lady's mantle - Comfort'. I am so sorry I asked for an extension of 2 days and posted this nearly 2 weeks later. Hope you like it.

A/N[2]: I heartily thank @mysiepereira for letting me use their fanart (below, NOT MINE) for this fic. Please go checkout their account which has multiple such cute artworks. Tell me if they don't melt your heart.

Life had become beautiful for Bucky with Steve by his side as not only his best friend but also a loving boyfriend. It was a promotion he knew he'd remain grateful for the rest of his life.

Steve was sketching in his notebook on his bed, his legs crossed in front of him, under the slanting rays of the sun through his window when Bucky knocked and entered his room, closing the door quietly behind him.

Smiling gleefully at his secret lovely boyfriend - he loved calling him that, Steve put his notebook down and sat up straighter as Bucky neared his side of the bed. Clutching Steve's face, Bucky leaned down to kiss Steve's pink lips softly at first, but when Steve grabbed his butt and pulled him nearer, the kiss was anything but that.

Bucky parted with a peck to Steve's nose and forehead before making Steve lay on the bed, "Hey Buck, what are you doing?"

Bucky didn't answer until he climbed Steve halfway through, "Hey Stevie, your pecs are my new pillow." He placed his head down on Steve's voluminous left pec and hugged him close.

Like a golden retriever, Steve barked out a laugh, "Guess I'd have to sign up as your human pillow now, huh?"

Bucky smiled, "The best." He pecked his pecs before resuming his position. He listened to Steve's heartbeat, calming himself down.

It had been difficult hiding their relationship from the team. Though they had admitted it to themselves, it had been difficult just thinking about being open to others about something which despite being legal was considered scandalous in the eyes of many still.

They weren't ashamed of themselves. Why should they be anyway? But it wasn't easy to overcome the fear of society instilled in their brains from back in the day about same sex relationships.

The team hadn't suspected anything as of yet. Ever since the "bliped" had returned, Bucky and Steve were practically joined at the hip. Sometimes Sam and Nat would be an addition too. They had anyways spent most of their time together before the start of their relationship. Once they were together, the team didn't even bat an eye at them always hanging out together, which made it much more easier for the pair of super soldiers helplessly in love. It was ordinary for the team and the staff. For them, pure bliss.

Behind closed doors, they'd find their solace in either Bucky's or Steve's room. For them, any place would work, really. They just needed to be in the company of each other to make a mundane moment magical. Somedays tough, it was a necessity.

Even with the help of the generous Wakandans and all the others who helped him recover after being free from HYDRA, Bucky couldn't revert back to his old self in the blink of an eye. Getting all those things he wasn't subjected to for decades - the freedom, the love, it overwhelmed him.

He still had trouble speaking and voicing his opinions, no matter how small or big they were. Everytime he thought of saying something, he unconsciously expected to be punished for speaking out of turn. Somedays, he had trouble forming words to express himself. Not that he didn't know vocabulary, but he couldn't translate his feelings into words.

Never having been taken away the basic right of speech before, Steve couldn't fully understand the reality of the torture Bucky had gone through if he were to be honest. But he tried. He had promised himself that he'd try to be there for Bucky, to support him, comfort him, be there for him anyway he could, anyway Bucky wanted or needed him. He would be the sun or the moon if the need be.

Because it was Bucky.

His Bucky.

He'd be damned if he let his lovely boyfriend let down ever again.

"How are you feeling, Buck?" Steve asked like a mother would to their child. He rubbed soft circles on Bucky's back.

Bucky wanted to say he was fine, but he wasn't. That day he woke up feeling not as good as usual. Steve had made Bucky promise to voice out whatever whenever he wanted without any hesitation, so he said, "Down."

"Thank you," Steve kissed the top of his head and pulled the both of them under his blanket. Steve understood it was hard for Bucky to say how he felt. To encourage it, he always thanked Bucky for not shutting him out and communicating with him even when he might not want to talk to anyone.

"You?" Bucky asked him. Grinning, he said, "As good as a human pillow could feel." Bucky chuckled.

"You remember that day we were training those agents?" Steve asked, combing Bucky's hair through his fingers. He hummed in response.

"I saw a few of those dames fawn endlessly over you, specially when they got a look of your backside. Some lads too. Made me so jealous."

Bucky furrowed his eyebrows, afraid Steve would become insecure, "Of me?"

"No," Steve replied, "of those who got to admire your beauty while I couldn't."

Bucky sheepishly grinned at Steve, "Oh, is that so?"

Steve hummed, "Everybody wants to have a look at my beautiful boyfriend."

Bucky laughed, "I like that."

Steve thought for a second, "What, 'beautiful boyfriend'?"

"Yeah. I - uh, I love it when you call me your boyfriend in general, and that has a nice ring to it. I like it." Bucky said, hiding his face in Steve's chest.

Steve grinned impossibly wide, "My beautiful boyfriend, Bucky." He wrapped his arms around the metal armed marshmallow who melted atop him.

"What would you like me to call you, handsome hunk?" Bucky asked in a teasing tone.

Steve chuckled, pausing for a second, "I don't know if you'll be okay with it..."

"You don't gotta worry about that, Stevie. It could be anything as long as you are mine." Bucky reassured him, absent mindedly drawing patterns on Steve's chest.

"Uh..." Steve began, unsure how to bring it up.

Bucky whispered, "Anything, Stevie."

Taking a deep breath, Steve continued without much confidence, "You - uh, remember what you called the girls you used to date back in the day?"

Taking a moment, he said, "I think I remember," Bucky lifted his head to look up at the love of his life, "doll."

Bucky would never forget how fast Steve changed colour, "Yeah, that..." He tried looking elsewhere, embarrassment clouding his demeanor.

Bucky was having none of that. He reached out to bring Steve's face towards himself and kissed him slowly, biting his lip gently at the end, "I'd loved to call you that." He hugged Steve tighter this time as he lay on top of him, "My doll."

Steve was thankful Bucky didn't face him this time, since he swore his face must have become as red as the henly Bucky wore.

Laying on top of him, Bucky felt Steve's heartbeat quicken when he called him that. He snuggled further into his chest, relishing the love and warmth he received.

Yeah, life had become very, very beautiful for the beautiful boyfriend and his doll.

~~~

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amtrax · 5 years ago

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Megaton Girl FAQ Masterpost

Here is a bunch of potential questions that you may have about Megaton Girl for both new and long-time followers!

What is Megaton Girl?

Megaton Girl is a scripted podcast (which is to say a radio play) that I would describe as a superhero comedy with lots of action, adorable romance, and an overarching story. The pilot is available here and I highly recommend checking it out if you want an idea of what the style and tone of the show will be.

Okay, well what’s the basic story?

From the official description:

After getting struck by a radioactive meteor, Connie Opland becomes the latest contender in a world of super hero celebrities: Megaton Girl. With the help of her girlfriend and secret publicist Laurel Fitz, and her mentor and manager Kirby, Connie aims to dethrone the corrupt and arrogant Captain Valiant as the greatest hero in the world!

That sounds totally radical, dude.

Thank you, 90′s-slang-spewing question asker.

I have very specific tastes. How will I know if I like this show?

If you enjoy any of the following, you’ll probably really really like this show: Stories with LGBTQ protagonists, Marvel and DC comics, Megas XLR, Teen Titans, The Adventure Zone, Critical Role, The Thrilling Adventure Hour, Mission to Zyxx, Hello from the Magic Tavern, Sonic Boom, Swat Kats, and honestly just check it out. The pilot’s only like 15 minutes long, and I think you’ll really love it if you check it out.

Well, who is the show about?

Connie Opland AKA Megaton Girl: A snarky, bubbly and easily excitable young woman with a love of food and low tolerance for jerks. After a bad run in with a corrupt superhero named Captain Valiant, Connie gets struck by a meteor and gains super powers. She dons the persona of Megaton Girl and begins a career in super-heroics, hoping one day to dethrone Captain Valiant and give the world a hero that actually gives a shit. She’s not very bright or quick to the uptake, but she has a ton of grit and determination. No matter how many times she hits the mat, she’s always back on her feet and ready to fight back. She lives with her best-friend (and now girlfriend), Laurel, in a cheap apartment in Los Dioses, California. Powers: Super strength, flight, energy beam attack (expelled through mouth), enhanced durability. She still feels pain and isn’t completely invincible, but she can withstand a megaton explosion and walk away alive (though VERY hurt).

Laurel Fitz: A shy, composed and brilliant lady with wonderful artistic talent and a passion for documenting the feats of superheroes. She is the newest member of the Olympus Illustrated news team. Her job is to essentially write and illustrate comic pages documenting the latest superhero news. When she gets on the bad side of her boss (whom is secretly Captain Valiant), she gets humiliated and demoted in front of the whole bullpen. When Connie gets superpowers, Laurel begins to secretly rebel against her boss by publishing a website dedicated to documenting the feats of Megaton Girl. She also begins learning the basics of superhero coaching from Connie’s manager, Kirby, who sees a ton of potential in her. She lives with her best friend (and now girlfriend), Connie, in a cheap apartment in Los Dioses, California.

William Kirby: A grumpy, no-nonsense old man with a long, once-celebrated history of superhero managing. He represented and coached the best of the best for decades before being forced into an early retirement by his last client, Captain Valiant. He distanced himself from society and lived out of his gym locker room for 15 years, until Connie and Laurel popped into his life asking for help. He’s long past his prime, so he calls in favors from heroes around the globe and beyond to assist in training Connie to be a hero herself. On the side, he begins to teach Laurel how to be a superhero coach, seeing her as a worthy future successor to his business.

Chuck Bradford AKA Captain Valiant: A vain, pompous, power-hungry man who is a superhero in job title only. He does everything for personal gain, even when it comes to stopping crimes. Once represented by Kirby, he cast his old manager aside when Kirby refused to coddle his ego. He lied, cheated and beat his way to the top of the superhero world, and stood unopposed as the most powerful hero in the world for a little over a decade. To fuel his ambitions, he runs the Olympus Illustrated news outlet, wildly overemphasizing his own deeds and often minimizing the efforts of other heroes. There are few heroes who verbally oppose him (and even fewer who physically oppose him), as he has been known to turn the world against those who seek to bring him down. Powers: Super strength (amplified by years of bodybuilding on top of his natural superhuman power), flight, energy beam attack (expelled through eyes), enhanced durability (comparable to Megaton Girl, though with a much higher pain tolerance due to more years explosions and bullets in his face).

Doctor Menace: A bombastic, bumbling, over-eager supervillain with copious amounts of intellect, but none of the brilliance to put it to much use. None of his plans have ever succeeded, his inventions are in perpetual “early-access,” and no hero or villain ever takes him seriously. In spite of his endless list of failures, he sets high goals for himself and always gets back up after every failure, with just as much vigor and excitement as ever. He just loves being the bad guy, no matter what gets in his way. He dreams of one day being the respected arch-nemesis of a powerful superhero with whom he can be locked in ceaseless bloody combat for all time, and to join a league of supervillains with which he can begin his conquest of the world. Also he’s stuck in a too-small tin can of a mech suit. Haha. Powers: Extraordinarily high IQ, high tech armor and gadgets with seemingly endless resources to create more, and limitless determination.

I watched the pilot and I [totally loved it]. Where’s the rest of the show?

We’re working on that! We want to turn this into a full series and already have several episodes written, but in order to produce a full series we will need funding to make sure that everyone involved is paid for their time. One possible goal is to get the show picked up by a podcast network so that we can run the show like a podcast with commercials. Another possibility is Patreon or some other form of crowdfunding.

Is there anyway I can help with that?

The absolute BEST thing you can do right now is to share the pilot. Reblog it, retweet it, TALK about it. Get the word out, and I do mean the word.Use the #MegatonGirl hashtag on Twitter. Tell people what you think, because word of mouth is the best form of getting people to listen. Tell US what you think! Share your thoughts on the pilot, leave iTunes reviews, leave Youtube comments! We want to know what you think!

This sounds like it’s gonna take a while! I want the show now! And an Oompa-Loompa too, daddy!

PUT THE GUN DOWN! WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, OKAY?! Alright, okay okay. How about we make a full first episode for now, and see what happens? We’ll produce a full origin-story episode about how Connie and Laurel become girlfriends, how Connie gets her super powers and begins her rivalry with Chuck, and how Connie stopped her first supervillain? It’ll be about an hour long and be a proper start to the series. That sound cool?

Looks like you keep your kneecaps today, sir.

Thank you for your blessing, gender non-specific question asker.

I have fanart/AUs/other fan related content that I want you to see. What’s the best way to get your eyes on it?

Tag me on Tumblr @amtrax or on Twitter (at)amtraxVA, and/or use the proper “#Megaton Girl” tag on Tumblr and the #MegatonGirl tag on Twitter! I have gotten some LOVELY fanart and I love seeing all of it, so if you have some and you want it seen, that’s the best way to get it seen!

Hey don’t you run away from me! I have other questions!

And I’ll gladly take them, any time! Either leave them in my askbox or Tweet it at me! I’ll always answer it as best as I can without spoiling too much of the show. I also put out a call for questions and art requests every week for Megaton Girl Megatuesday, so keep any eye out for that as well.

For now, I think that’s a good spot to leave this. I will update this later as necessary, but I hope your basic needs are tended to for now! Thank you for your time and hope you enjoy what’s to come next!

#Megaton Girl #faq page #Connie Opland #laurel fitz #William Kirby #Chuck Bradford #Captain Valiant #Doctor Menace

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honeymoonjin · 6 years ago

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curious - taehyung x reader x yoongi smut

A/N: 4.4k. This has been extended for the full version as of 19/04, rather than me posting the second part separately. Taehyung confides in you and your boyfriend Yoongi that he might be bi, and the two of you offer to let him experiment with you to find out. Warnings for explicit sexual content: mxm oral, female receiving oral, exhibitionism/voyeurism, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, dirty talk, mxm sex, threesome.

Recently, date night in with Yoongi had become overrun by one of Yoongi’s bandmates and best friends, Taehyung. You weren’t sure if he just didn’t get the memo, or if he didn’t care, but week after week, the second you thought you were going to finally get some alone time with Yoongi, Taehyung had to show up. The worst part was, you could never get mad at him either.

On this particular evening, the three of you had been drinking a fair amount, trying to loosen Tae’s lips on whatever issue had been bothering him in the past week or so.

“No matter what it is, we won’t judge you, I promise.” You reach over and clasp his hand in yours, and he stares down at it sullenly.

“I just don’t want you guys to find it gross.”

“Honestly, Tae,” Yoongi groans from the other side of Tae, leaning back on the couch with one arm resting on the back, fingers brushing against the back of Tae’s neck when he moved. “One time I walked in on Namjoon jacking it to some army fanart of himself jacking it. I can’t imagine whatever you have is weirder than that.”

Taehyung takes a deep breath, avoiding eye contact with either of you. “I think…I might be attracted to men. As well as women, I mean.” He shifts uncomfortably. “If you think-”

“Taehyung,” you interrupt firmly, “there’s nothing wrong with that. Have you not been paying attention to the lyrics of your own group? All of us are fine with that.” You squeeze his hand. “But I’m so happy you felt like you could tell us.”

“It only took an entire bottle of our good wine,” Yoongi grumbles, downing the last of his glass. “Anyway, is that it?”

“Well, no,” Taehyung starts, voice still quieter than usual, “I’m not totally sure. I haven’t really done much stuff with either gender before, so I don’t know for certain. It’s all so confusing.”

Maybe if you weren’t already on the deep end of tipsy you wouldn’t have suggested it, but you are, and as you glance past Tae to your boyfriend, you can see in his eyes he’s having the same idea. “The only way to know is to try, Tae-tae.”

“That’s the problem!” he protests, “I don’t…oh. Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

You hum happily and lean onto him so that your faces are centimeters apart. “If you want to experiment, we’d love to have you.”

“Have…me?”

Yoongi lowers his arm so that instead of the tips of his fingers touching Tae, his whole hand is wrapped around the back of his neck, pointer and middle finger slipping up to scratch lightly along his scalp. “Let hyung take care of you, Tae. We’ll just play around for a little bit, no strings attached, and then you can decide afterwards if you’re bisexual or not. Does that sound good?”

Tae’s eyes flutter shut and his head tips back at Yoongi’s gentle but insistent touches. “I’d really like that, but only if you’re sure.”

“Oh, Y/n is definitely sure,” Yoongi confirms, “aren’t you, baby girl? I’m not small by any means but I’ve told her you’re bigger.”

Taehyung whips his head around to Yoongi. “You…you what?”

“Come on, Tae. All the members tell their girlfriends about the sexual exploits of the others. It’s basically tradition at this point.”

“You do?”

“It’s okay, Tae-tae,” you coo, “I won’t tell anybody. It just seems a shame to let your natural talents go to waste. When was the last time you got your dick sucked, huh?”

“Uh, never.”

Your mouth falls open. “Wait, are you serious? Well, that ends tonight. Which one of us do you want to suck your cock, baby?”

He flushes and lets out a little whimper, mumbling something.

Yoongi grins, catlike. “Speak up, Taehyung.”

“I want hyung to do it.”

You bite your lip, trying to subdue the excitement you feel at seeing your boyfriend kneel between the legs of another man, of one of your best friends. By now, there’s a growing dark patch on his otherwise grey sweatpants, and you can tell by the slight stretch of the fabric that he must be painfully hard.

Taehyung sighs and tips his head back when Yoongi pulls the waistband down enough to let his dick spring out, the cool air lighting up the sensitive nerves. Yoongi swallows hard, pupils blown wide and the look of lust on his face has you shifting against the couch, wanting some friction.

Unfortunately for you, the erotic sight of your boyfriend leaning in and licking a broad stripe up the side of Taehyung’s cock is never repeated. Taehyung swears, and his hand flies down to push Yoongi away by the forehead.

“What are you doing?” Yoongi huffs, but you hear the hint of concern behind his gruff tone.

“I-It’s too much, I don’t want to come like this,” he replies shakily, “I don’t want this to be over just yet.”

You smile teasingly. “What do you want to do then, Taehyung? We could all sit in a circle and sing kumbaya until you think you can last longer than ten seconds.”

His eyes are half-lidded as he stares at you and the tan of his cheeks is slightly pinkened. “I,” he swallows and wets his lips nervously, “I want to watch you guys.”

A spike of arousal shoots through you as you suck in a breath. “What do you want to watch us do, Tae-tae?”

He breaks your gaze and turns to Yoongi. “Can you make her cum, hyung?”

Yoongi looks up at Taehyung from between his legs. He blows cool air over the head of Taehyung’s cock, grinning catlike at the way Taehyung hisses and jerks his hips. “Make her cum how?”

“With your mouth,” he pants, “and your fingers.”

Yoongi doesn’t respond verbally but instead stands up and walks out of the living room and into the dining area. You frown until you hear the scraping of chair legs and you see Yoongi return, only to place a single chair in the middle of the room.

“Come sit, baby girl,” he says in a low tone.

Your heart races, but you stand up, undressing on your way there until you sit in the chair completely naked. The open air feels nice against the heat of your pussy, but you’ll go crazy if you don’t get some friction soon.

Luckily, Yoongi is in a giving mood tonight. He glances over his shoulder at Taehyung. “How many?”

You tip your head back at the question, and Taehyung lets out a breathy chuckle. “How many can she take?”

Yoongi hums in consideration and runs a single finger up the inside of your naked thigh. “She’ll take everything I give her like a good little slut, won’t you, baby?”

“Yeah,” you breathe out dumbly, knowing that he can probably smell your arousal from down there if he can’t already see it. Yoongi always knew exactly how to get you excited fast.

Taehyung groans and Yoongi laughs at the sound. “Of course, she will need to be able to fuck us once I’m done, so maybe we’ll cap it at two for now, hm?”

Without further confirmation from Taehyung, though it does come in the form of another desperate groan, Yoongi readjusts his position so his face is inches away from your heat. You automatically let your legs tip open wider for him, and he rewards you with a gentle smile, teeth resting on his bottom lip.

Slipping one hand under each knee, he leans down and flicks the lightest kitten lick against your clit. You exhale shakily. “Yoongi, please, hurry up.”

He hums but otherwise ignores you, slowly pulling your legs wider apart for him and tugging in one solid motion so that your butt slips out from under you. You squeak in surprise and latch onto his shoulders, now with your tailbone resting right on the edge of the chair.

He lets go of your legs after lifting one up over his shoulder and letting the other hang limp and reaches between your legs to spread your lips.

You whine as he shifts to the side and turns around slightly, pulling your leg with him further. “Come here, Tae,” he commands, “come see.”

Taehyung swears and goes to tuck his erection back into his pants but Yoongi shakes his head. Reluctantly, the younger boy comes to kneel beside Yoongi, cock still dribbling precum hopelessly, bobbing in the air when he moves. You don’t envy him; at least you’re getting some relief.

“Doesn’t she look so pretty, Tae? All spread out and ready for us?”

You groan at the use of the word ‘us’ and feel yourself grow even wetter. Taehyung glances up at you and smiles shyly. “She’s beautiful.”

You flush but the sweet moment is interrupted by a small growl from Yoongi. “Watch and learn, buddy.” Without a moment’s hesitation, he plunges a single finger into you, palm down.

Yoongi grins at your pleased whine, and begins fucking you slowly, corkscrewing his finger as he goes for more friction. It feels so good after being turned on for so long, but it’s not enough, and you shift your hips up, eager for more. “Look at her,” Yoongi whispers sultrily, “we’ve barely even started and she’s desperate to cum. Don’t worry, baby, you’ll get enough orgasms tonight to last you the week if you’re lucky.”

He pulls out his drenched finger and pushes it back in with another, not thrusting, just curling up and pulling out some of your copious amount of wetness and offers the shiny digits to Taehyung. “Have some, baby boy. We need to get your appetite up.”

Taehyung stares at Yoongi unsurely as he leans forward and gently laps up your cum off of Yoongi’s fingers. Once most of it is gone, he pushes his tongue so that the two fingers split apart and licks up through the middle to collect all that’s left, breaking the strings that stretch between Yoongi’s digits.

The sight is unbelievably erotic, and it’s all you can do to keep your eyes open to enjoy it when the bliss you feel as well as the sleepy buzz from the alcohol wants you to shut them. You bite your lip and whine again, wanting the attention back on you, and Yoongi obeys, this time landing his mouth on you.

In teasing but calculated strokes, he stimulates your clit, flicking over it and under and around the sensitive hood. Instead of giving you more penetration, he has to use one arm across your hips to keep you still, and the other hand to keep you spread and open for him.

“So good, Yoongi,” you breathe heavily amongst pleasure-filled pants, digging your heel into Yoongi’s back, and you’re too blissed out to notice Taehyung approaching you quietly and reaching a hand out to touch your chest.

At the exact moment that he grabs hold of your left breast, thumb and forefinger skimming over the top to roll your stiff peak between them, Yoongi stops licking you and sucks your clit into his mouth, dragging the flat top of his tongue against it firmly.

You cry out and jerk in the chair, catapulted into a powerful orgasm. Taehyung gasps and hastily takes his hand off of you, worried that he’s done something wrong, and you whine at the absence of pleasure on your chest as your clit is played with all throughout your orgasm.

Yoongi plays rough but he’s not cruel, or at least he isn’t this early in the night, so once the pleasure gives way to stinging oversensitivity and you push at his head, he backs off with a glossy, wet face and smug eyes.

You pant, going boneless, feeling the walls of your pussy clench periodically as aftershocks run through you.

“I didn’t hurt her, did I, hyung?” Taehyung asks innocently.

Yoongi chuckles. “No, you didn’t, she liked it. And as a matter of fact, even if it did hurt, she still would’ve liked it. Dirty slut.”

Taehyung’s eying up your heaving breasts as you come down fully. “I thought you said two, Yoongi.”

Yoongi smirks. “You’re right, I did say that. You ready to go again, baby girl?”

You hum your confirmation, expecting him to start small like last time, but your eyes fly open and your hips jerk in his grip when the hand by your pussy suddenly gets into action as he fucks you with two slightly-curled fingers at a brutal pace.

Every stroke drags against your g-spot, and your toes curl when Yoongi pairs the merciless thrusts with hard sucks at your clit like it’s candy.

“Ah-a-ah, Yoongi!” you cry out desperately under the overwhelming assault. It’s like all your nerves are on fire, and you don’t know that you can take much more. You whimper when you feel Yoongi pull his mouth away from you for a second to command Tae in a gruff voice to play with your tits.

Taehyung jumps forward eagerly and cups your breasts firmly, playing roughly with your peaked nipples. The added stimulation launches you into a second orgasm which has you swearing and crying out far louder than the first one. Taehyung keeps his fingers rolling your nipples until it becomes too much, and you cringe away.

Once both Yoongi and Tae sit back and you feel like you can breathe again, you let your leg fall off Yoongi’s shoulder and tuck them together, too sensitive for anything else.

“What do you want now, baby?” Yoongi mumbles, voice muffled. You look down at them in confusion only to see your boyfriend nibbling at Taehyung’s neck, the younger member’s eyes squeezed shut in bliss, baring his throat to his hyung. “Are you ready to join in now?”

Taehyung swallows hard but nods eagerly. “Yeah, hyung.”

“Mm, good.” Yoongi pulls back and admires the blossoming hickeys he’s sucked into Tae’s golden skin. “You sure you don’t want me to suck you off?”

Taehyung looks like he’s turning down free money as he shakes his head miserably. “I know I won’t last. God, I feel ready to burst even now and I’ve done nothing but watch you two.”

You adjust yourself in the seat with shaky legs. “Tell me, Tae: do you reckon you’re a top or a bottom?”

He coughs. “A what? I- I told you guys I haven’t done this kind of thing before.”

“Surely you know, though,” you reason, “there’s a pretty big difference between fucking someone and getting fucked in the ass.” You grin cheekily. “Yoongi would know.”

The man himself turns around to glare at you. “That was one time. Behave, little girl, or you won’t have the strength left to get off that chair.”

You gulp but stay silent. Your clit still hasn’t stopped twitching from that last orgasm, and you think pissing your boyfriend off maybe isn’t the best idea right now.

Taehyung shrugs. “I don’t know, I just… I’d rather one of you tells me what to do here. This is my first rodeo, after all.”

“Bottom, then.” Yoongi sits up on his knees and stretches languidly, pulling his shirt off to reveal the unblemished planes of his lean but soft stomach and wiry shoulders. “We’ll need to prep you first, baby boy. Will you be good for us?”

Taehyung nods, and the use of the plural ‘we’ makes you feel more in control and less on the chopping block than you did before. You manage to stand up off of the chair, wincing at the large puddle on the outer edge that drips onto the carpet. “Let’s take this to the bedroom, Yoongi. The last thing I need is jizz stains on our good cushions.”

Yoongi raises an amused brow at your commanding tone, but follows, letting the loose elastic waist of his old sweatpants hang low on his hips as he strolls down the hall, leaving Taehyung to help escort you and your weak legs down like a gentleman.

Yoongi’s already into the lube when you arrive and collapse onto the bed, and you shuffle up against the pillows, watching happily as your boyfriend positions Tae in front of you, face to the sheets and ass up, still fully clothed.

“This is your last chance, Tae,” Yoongi warns, “are you sure you want to do this? No hard feelings.”

Taehyung props himself up on his elbows. “I want this, hyung. This…feels right.”

“Then strip for me, baby.”

You watch Taehyung’s whole body shivers at Yoongi’s dark tone, but he tugs off his shirt and wriggles out of his pants and underwear, until he��s lying flat on the bed, dick trapped between his stomach and the bedsheets.

“Ass up, Taehyung. I want you to stay that way until I say you can move, got it?”

“Yes, hyung.” Tae follows his command and sighs into the mattress when Yoongi runs a warm and still slightly sticky palm over one cheek, giving it a playful smack.

Normally, you would be touching yourself at this point, jealous of the action you were missing out on, but you were so tired that the only thing even keeping you awake was how erotic the sight in front of you was. Over the next few minutes, Yoongi began stretching Taehyung open for him, praising him for how well he was taking Yoongi’s fingers. One became two, two became three, and soon enough, Yoongi was rifling around in your bedside cupboard for two condom packets.

“Here’s the plan,” he states upon his return, giving his cock a few lazy tugs before rolling a condom on, “you think you might like men, so I’ll fuck you. But you also think you probably like women, so you’ll fuck Y/n. Put this on.”

Tae lets out a quiet groan and fumbles for the foil square Yoongi threw on the bed, struggling to put it on his dick from his all-fours position, but obediently staying there nonetheless. Eventually both men are ready, and you shuffle yourself down a little further until you are slotted underneath Taehyung.

“Hey,” you greet teasingly.

With the ceiling lamp illuminating his mop of hair, Taehyung looks like a dream as he beams down at you in nervous excitement, muttering a breathy, “hey” back.

“You get used to Y/n’s pussy and then you can take me, okay, Tae?”

Taehyung nods shyly at Yoongi’s command, and reacheds down to place his cock at your entrance, endearingly shoving it between your legs blindly a few times before managing to slip in. Your body was so wet and relaxed from your two orgasms that the moment he finds the right spot, he sinks in a good few inches. He lets out a startled gasp and swears, squeezing his eyes shut.

“Does it feel good?” Yoongi asks from behind him.

You let out a quiet laugh, relishing in the feeling of his blunt head inside you. “Don’t speak too soon, Yoongi. He hasn’t even got halfway yet.”

“A-ah!” Taehyung lets out a deep cry as Yoongi scoffs and pushes down harshly on Taehyung’s hips, forcing him to plunge fully inside you without warning. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, oh god,” Tae chants, shaking over you.

You can’t help but laugh at his cute inexperience, but it’s with a furrowed brow because Yoongi is right; Taehyung is definitely bigger than him. It’s a stretch you’ve never felt before, and even just the mere act of light laughter causes shocks up your spine as the slightest shift of your pelvis makes his cock hit parts of your vagina that you didn’t even know a dick could reach.

Taehyung wiggles his hips a little to get used to the feeling of being inside someone, and you let out a low, long moan, making Yoongi chuckle at the sound. “Oh, I think Tae-tae’s not the only one having fun tonight, hm? Does my little slut like having another man’s cock inside her?”

“Mm, it’s good, baby. You’re missing out on feeling him stretch you open. It’s fucking delightful.”

Taehyung blushes at the praise but Yoongi just tuts. “I don’t think I’m missing out at all, not when I get to enjoy his perfect ass. You ready for me, Tae?”

“Oh, please,” Taehyung sighs, shuddering as he feels the pressure of Yoongi pushing into him.

It takes a while since Taehyung is so tight, but eventually the three of you are completely flattened together, your hips reaching around all the way to Yoongi, enjoying the way lifting your hips at that angle makes Taehyung slide even deeper.

“Fuck,” you breathe, “if one of you doesn’t start to fuck me, I’m going to go crazy.”

“See, Taehyung? My dirty girl is insatiable. Should we give her what she wants?”

Taehyung nods feverishly, whimpering ever so softly as Yoongi begins to rut into him shallowly. Once he gets a hang of the rhythm, he begins fucking into you every time Yoongi pulls away, forming a cycle of alternating thrusts, back into Yoongi and forward into you, over and over.

You tip your head back and allow yourself to be lazy, simply taking whatever Taehyung gives you. The friction has you worked up yet again, although you’re not really expecting to come again.

Behind Taehyung, you can see the look of pure focus on Yoongi’s face as he builds up his strength until the only noises in the room are the slapping of skin and the sounds of pleasure emanating from the three of you.

You’re struck by the thought of how harmonious the three of you sound; Taehyung’s much deeper voice balancing out Yoongi’s and your higher ones.

“How does it feel, Tae-tae?” Yoongi grunts between thrusts.

“Ah, so good, hyung, it feels so fucking good. O-oh god, I’m close already.” Taehyung keeps slamming his cock into you on the offbeat of Yoongi’s thrusts, and his moans begin to come a little more unevenly. “Mmm, fuck, I can’t- Ah, I’m gonna- fuck!” Taehyung’s cries become a growl as Yoongi freezes and reaches a hand around to grip Taehyungs cock tightly at the base, stopping his impending orgasm.

“Not yet,” he gruffly commands, “you don’t get to cum until I say so, pretty boy.”

“Please,” Taehyung whispers, but doesn’t protest, hanging his head in frustration.

Yoongi releases his grip, slapping him sharply on his right ass cheek. “Did I say you could fucking stop?”

Taehyung sighs out unsteadily and starts picking his rhythm back up. “Hyung, I can’t hold it back, she’s so tight and you’re so big.”

“Compliments won’t get you to cum faster, Taehyung,” Yoongi scolds, slamming into the younger boy with all his energy, sweat beginning to bead on his chest. “I want you to beg for it.”

You bite your lip and moan. Taehyung feels so good inside you, and his slight curve means he’s dragging against the bottom of your clit with every stroke, but it’s the dirty words from your boyfriend that have you beginning to approach the edge. You reach a hand up to begin lazily rolling your nipples between your fingers, eyes lolling shut in raw pleasure.

“Please, hyung,” Tae moans, “it’s too much, please let me cum. I need it so bad. I’ve been a good boy, Yoongi.”

Yoongi chuckles darkly. “And good boys get to cum, do they?”

“Ye-es,” he whines wantonly.

“Cum for us, Taehyung. Now.”

Your hand is roughly squished, and the breath is knocked out of you when Taehyung suddenly collapses onto you fully, his hips wildly jerking as he screams out his orgasm. His feral desperation, paired with Yoongi’s beautiful cries as he finds his own release prove too much for you, and you’re thrown without warning into a third orgasm.

It’s much weaker than the other two, but it comes out of nowhere and hits you like a train, leaving you shuddering under Taehyung’s heated torso.

Once all three of you calm down, the two men pull out one at a time and both stumble over to the trash can like it’s an office water cooler, taking off their used condoms and disposing of them properly.

In a half-asleep daze, you hear Yoongi tell Taehyung to go back on the bed, and you feel the bed dip under his weight as he lies on his side facing you. Yoongi joins the two of you, lifting your dead limbs up one by one to maneuver you under the sweaty sheets, then following suit.

For about ten minutes, your pants all mingle together in the otherwise silent room, but eventually Taehyung speaks up. “…thank you,” he whispers with a croaky voice, “I really appreciate this, you guys.”

You hum in content. “You’re welcome, Tae-tae.”

“So, what’s your consensus?” Yoongi ventures.

Taehyung’s shyness seems to have vanished after his orgasm. “I sure liked getting fucked more than I thought I would.”

Yoongi lets out a hearty laugh. “Glad I could be of service, then.”

“Thank you, hyung. Thank you, noona.”

You close your eyes and snuggle into the sheets. “Night, Tae.”

“Oh. Am I not… You don’t want me to go?”

Yoongi shuffles on the bed, presumably sitting up to face Taehyung. “If you don’t get under the sheets and spend the night, I’ll have to make you stay myself.” There’s no bite behind his threat but Taehyung laughs weakly and does as he says anyway.

You enjoy the sound of their breathing evening out for a few moments, but then poke Yoongi’s cheek. “Do you reckon any of the other guys might want a sexual education while we’re at it?”

You let out a squeak when he turns quickly and nips your finger. “Watch it, Y/n. Your pussy isn’t a public service.”

Taehyung sighs blissfully. “It fucking should be.”

Yoongi grumbles. “Goodnight, everyone. Taehyung, I hope you enjoyed this one-time offer. Sleep well.”

You have to laugh at his tough demeanor. “Don’t worry, baby. I’d take your dick over Tae’s any day.”

“Good, because the buffet is closed.”

“…but maybe it can open again for special occasions?”

“No.”

“That’s fair. Night, Yoongi.”

“Goodnight, baby girl.”

#taehyung smut #yoongi smut #bts smut #taegi smut #bts x reader

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meimi-haneoka · 6 years ago

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Thoughts on Chapter 32 of Clear Card

Mwahaahah everyone, welcome to the review of this Cardcaptor Sakura doujinshi Clear Card chapter, we’ve reached number 32!

Yessir you heard me, the manga that was supposed to be a one shot has actually come this far, and CLAMP have waited all this time to turn Clear Card into the dream of many fans, a doujinshi!! XD Why am I saying this?

Well, since these ramblings have really no sense nor order to respect, let’s start from the bottom (after the cut, cause I don’t want any of you on my coscience for dying of cuteness, eh)!

Honey, I shrunk the kids

MWAHAHAHAHAH WHAT THE F*CK IS THIIIIS? AAAAAHHH???

Istg I can’t calm down whenever I look back to this page XD I mean, I don’t know about you but in all these years I’ve seen TONS of doujinshi and fanarts imagining how Sakura would deal with a younger Syaoran and vice versa... I’m pretty sure CLAMP must have seen them, I mean, come on. And now they delivered, they really did turn Syaoran into a little kid, through Sakura’s strong and uncontrolled magic. He’s really the cutest thing and I want to hug him so badly! <3 I found so sweet that Sakura thought about how it would’ve been if they met earlier than they did. I mean, I think that’s a pretty common thought in couples in love. ”I wish I would’ve met you sooner”. Especially as a result of making up after a rough period. You feel so full of love that you would want to catch up even for the time you couldn’t spend with your loved one, because you didn’t met them yet. And I also want to say THANK YOU to CLAMP for making Sakura express the doubt that Syaoran only came back for a “duty” (which was still in her interest, but maybe it would’ve pushed aside the romantic factor). Syaoran replies with a very firm and even slightly upset expression, like “hey love, are you really doubting my feelings?”, but his “I wanted to see you as soon as possible” is really a breath of fresh air, it eases even more the tension (especially in the fandom, for all of those doubting Syaoran’s feelings). I’d dare say CLAMP did it to let rest once and for all the question “are Syaoran’s feelings sincere?”. That little blush on his cheek was absolutely adorable too!! But after the due squealing, we better analyze the situation. Yes, Syaoran is very cute and I’m pretty sure Sakura will notice that. But after the initial surprise and feeling of tenderness will wear off, I expect Sakura to panic. Because Syaoran can’t obviously stay like that, and now she knows she’s the one causing this, and this will make her even more nervous to find a solution. When one is panicking it gets harder to think and find solutions. Syaoran didn’t want her to know as long as possible for a precise reason, it’s because her being conscious of it will make it even worse. We’ll see how CLAMP will deal with that. At the end of the chapter there’s this text put by the editorial department, talking about a “new development you can’t tear your eyes off” which makes us believe this will probably not be a thing of a page or two! Furthermore, story-wise it’s already evening, almost dinner time, and you can’t leave a child this small to live on his own. Hell, he looks like 4/5 years old at best. We’ll see if CLAMP will choose the comical way or the serious one!

Nakuru and Suppi are back!

Complete with a suitcase and a fancy dress, Nakuru became the embodiment of a meme we, the fandom, have often associated with her. XD CLAMP never cease to amaze me for how they’re tuning in with the fandom! XD But her (and Suppi’s) task this time is far more important: they’re here for an info dump and to be Yue and Kero-chan’s “batteries”, to keep them awake, especially in crucial times. It’s basically starting a new cohabitation that I’m sure will spark many funny moments. No matter what Touya might have to say about it XD The info dump turned into another fandom-oriented moment: during the more than 2 years period I’ve been chatting on the CCS discord server, I’ve often seen fans theorizing “Eriol is probably not coming to Tomoeda yet cause otherwise who knows what Kaito could do to the airplane bearing him”. Turns out, our fears were featured in this chapter! XD Kaito’s morality is still pretty unclear by Eriol’s words, but one thing is sure: Kaito’s got the degree of power needed to drop the airplane bearing Eriol, but he wouldn’t go that far since it would mean involving too many people and getting hassled by investigations...So yeah, he probably wouldn’t do it, but between the lines Eriol (and so, CLAMP) is telling us that it’s not because he wouldn’t want to kill Eriol. Or at least, this is what CLAMP want us to believe at this stage of the story (remember, it’s still all Eriol’s reasoning). To be honest, I’m still shocked that CLAMP would introduce this concept, this idea at all in a manga like CCS. It’s creepy and thrilling at the same time. I’ve been saying forever that they’re raising the bar in Clear Card, and they really are.

Kaito’s turmoil

I don’t really know how to interpret this, but this is the second time Kaito makes weird and sad faces while talking about how Sakura is loved by people and how she’s got great memories because of them. Is he relating this to Akiho’s experience? Is he relating this to his own experience? Is he feeling a bit envious there? Momo’s following statement “Akiho loves that girl a lot too” and his wordless reply only adds to the concerning moment. HOW should we interpret that? Does his plan include to hurt ot treat Sakura in an unfair way? So maybe he was silent because he was guiltily aknowledging the possible consequences of his actions on Akiho? Or maybe something else, like he was thinking of how the bond between the 2 girls will be crucial to the success of his plan? While brain storming, I had a lot of thoughts about this scene. It’s unsettling, but it’s interesting precisely because of that. And then, how can we not mention the cute scene where Akiho blushed? XD I’m pretty sure Kaito said that without implying anything, he didn’t even realize how what he said could be interpreted...for him it’s just (a part of) the truth! But Akiho’s loving heart of course couldn’t help but beating a little faster! (a little??) Let me tell you that Momo was GREAT when she said she would kick him once she went back to her true form!!! XD It must have been because how cheesy he sounded, and yet he’s not realizing anything!!

So that’s it for chapter 32, this chapter was great but I’m pretty sure next chapter will be EVEN MORE great, with the baby Syao madness!! Will our heroine find a way to fix this mess??

#cardcaptor sakura #Card Captor Sakura #clear card arc #clear card manga #ccs spoilers #chapter 32 #syaoran li #sakura kinomoto #syaosaku #yuna d kaito #rambling

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satire-please · 6 years ago

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Play is the Work of the Childhood

Summary: I once saw a fanart of Hua Cheng snuggling a kid Xie Lian. Therefore this fic was spawn.

Perhaps Xie Lian should have seen this coming.

After all, in his 800-year experience, what goes around, comes around. What misfortune you see and witness will eventually happen to you.

Life enjoys being fair in that aspect.

Still, he didn't expect to be in this position as a wave of green smoke bellows from the mouth of the monster he and Hua Cheng just fought, just slain, it rushing at him and encasing him in a smoggy fist.

For the vile creature's last attack, it shakes Xie Lian like a child throwing a tantrum before throwing him across the cave.

He smacks into the stone wall, the pain makes him gasp...and the smoke rushes into his mouth.

It burns.

His lungs, his head, his bones twisting, his skin shrinking.

"Dianxia!" Xie Lian hurts, his brain rattling in his skull but he can still hear the desperate panic in Hua Cheng's voice, the ring of steel clashing in the background. "Are you alright? Answer me!"

Xie Lian coughs a few times. His ears ringing, he collapses down the rock face disoriented and forces his eyes to open. Hua Cheng's form is blurry but he can tell the man is sprinting towards him. "I'm fine–"

"Your voice! What's happened to you?" What was wrong with his voice? Well, it does sound different. The tone is off. Higher, younger.

Oh no.

It couldn't be.

Xie Lian puts a hand to his throat and rubs it. He tries to prioritize. "It was just the monster's deathblow, a curse I think–"

Hua Cheng swears loudly.

"–But I'll recover, will you destroy the body? Its remains could still harm any that come across it. It would be unfortunate if the villagers still had trouble after they worked so hard to get us for help."

"Yes. It won't ever bother them or Dianxia ever again," Hua Cheng declares vindictively. "Where are you? I can't see you, the smoke refuses to clear."

"Here. Over here." Xie Lian calls. He tries to get up, but his legs catch in sometimes, he looks down to see what's the matter and finds entire lower body trapped in his robes. They tangle over his limbs oversized...why are they so big?

He knows why. Yet please allow him to deny it a little longer. The clues of his voice, his clothes and the small hand he brings to his face are obvious and sooner or later he must accept reality.

He's been changed.

The curse turned him younger...much, much younger.

"There you are! Let me take a look at you, we'll figure out the contents of the curse and break it to–" A red tunic fills the corner his vision and Xie turns toward it.

But his friend, no his companion, freezes in place.

The man is not even breathing. True neither of them need to breathe but Hua Cheng has always been very courteous to do so in the past, so it’s alarming for Xie Lian to see him stop. The demon king is a statue harder than any stone.

“San Lang?” Xie Lian attempts to free an arm from his tangled nest of fabric, but the large sleeve flops over his wrist. Hua Cheng is so tall. Then again everything is so much bigger from this point of view. “What's wrong? Did the creature hurt you too?”

Hua Cheng moves fast.

One moment he’s a few feet away, the next he’s crouched in front of Xie Lian, hands cupping his cheeks to verify that this image is no illusion. Xie Lian notes the coolness of that skin and how those fingers reach the back of his skull easily.

He blushes and glances to the side. Hua Cheng’s hands are one of his favorite things about his man.

“I am blessed.” Is the first thing the demon king says in a minute. His one eye drinking in every change to Xie Lian’s form, his head cocked to the side. “Huh. I never knew I wanted this.”

“Wanted what?” Xie tilts his face or tries to. In Hua Cheng’s tender hold the action has him leaning into his palm.

Hua Cheng makes a trapped sound at the back of his throat. "You're so little."

Xie Lian should take offense, but honestly, he is...little. He had always been a terribly small child once upon a time, or he supposes in the current present. He attempts to calculate his age based on appearances. He'd barely come up to Hua Cheng's hip, his arms are chubby, oh dear, he must be around five or six and his–

"Your hair is so short. Is this how you felt when I was transformed against my will?" Hua Cheng muses, fingers twisting in the dark locks that fall right below his chin. "I have every inclination to lock you up and do all that I must to protect you. You're beyond precious."

“Ah. Now I understand why you were so embarrassed. This is humiliating." Xie Lian murmurs in reply. Xie Lian view’s blocked by a curtain of black hair and there’s a cold press of lips on his forehead. “San Lang!”

“Sorry.” But then he feels the same sensation on his temple. “Excuse me.”

Xie Lian’s cheeks are not left alone. A pepper of kisses rain down on his nose and his eyelids and Xie Lian is going to die if his face gets any redder.

“S-Stop!”

“Must I? Very well.” Hua Cheng finally leans back on his heels, a wry smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. However, he keeps Xie Lian trapped in his embrace, especially as he stands up. Xie Lian’s tiny hands scramble for broad shoulders as he’s basically manipulated to sit on one arm, the other moving around his back protectively. “I apologize, I truly can't help myself, Gege. You are honestly the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen.”

"You were just as cute. No, cuter!" Xie Lian pouts.

"I doubt it."

"You were!" He insists. Xie Lian watches Hua Cheng reach into his red coat for the dice. He tosses them up absentmindedly before the portal opens to the Paradise Manor.

“Nonsense, most considered me to be a vile and ugly child. They called me a feral cat.”

“I didn’t’!”

Hua Cheng smiled. “This is true. Only you.” And he kisses Xie Lian on the cheek again to end the argument.

The hallways echo with the sound of Hua Cheng's heavy boots before they enter the bedchambers, the closet.

It's larger than four Puji Shrines put together and a whimper leaves Xie Lian before he can stop it.

“Now let’s see what we can do about your clothes.” Good cheer has never been so menacing.

During the length of an incense stick or two Xie Lian is tortured with good taste. The large robes replaced with a barrage of outfits Hua Cheng fishes out of the abyss of the wardrobe.

It takes a while before Hua Cheng plants the new child in front of a mirror to work on the final details. The demon king is pleased to find that even a scowl on the younger face is adorable

“Is this really necessary?”

“Now, Dianxia it’s only fair and just. I recall when I was forced into child form, I couldn’t leave your arms for at least a day. You kept carrying me around and playing with my hair.”

It was soft. Who could blame the martial god?

"You were a treasure,” Xie Lian mutters.

“Yes, and now you’re mine. So enough objections and stay still enough to let me put this on.”

Well, Xie Lian can’t stop Hua Cheng from doing anything, not really, therefore he sighs and keeps his arms up as Hua Cheng fixes his sleeves. “I meant the clothes. This is a lot of work for a temporary situation. Where did you even get these?"

"Secret."

Xie Lian wrinkles his nose. The reflection shows the spitting image of his five-year-old self. In fact, he believes these are the exact same hair ornaments his own mother placed into his hair so long ago. A bright golden dragon with ruby eyes, glaring at all, perches on his head to keep his hair half up and out of his face.

All so Hua Cheng can cup, squeeze and poke his cheeks better.

Which he demonstrates.

Quite often.

It’s as if there’s a time limit to how long those fingers can stay away. Thirty seconds or less.

The mirror reveals a victim draped in layers of the finest silk, pictures of flowers and fighting scenes race across the fabric in dark heavy thread. His feet have matching slippers with twinkling small bells to give away his location immediately. He hates them. He shifts minutely and they ring. They sing. It’s been a long time since he’s been decked in such ridiculous finery.

Hua Cheng loves it.

“So this is how you were as a child.” Hua Cheng coos. Dressing him has taken over an hour, yet much to Xie Lian’s dismay instead of complaining, he seemed to relish picking out every single detail from what sash goes best, the golden one of course, to the bracelets and rings that cover Xie Lian’s fingers. He hums happily, “How did they ever let you out of the palace?”

“They didn’t.” Xie Lian was only allowed to start making public appearances at thirteen. And then only by his father’s side or securely placed in his mother’s lap. Just like how he's in Hua Cheng's now with a tug on the back of his robe so he falls right perfectly into the bowl those crossed legs make.

“I’ve been incredibly fortunate to see so many sides of you.” Xie Lian closes his eyes, Hua Cheng reflection is beaming. It’s unbearable. “My luck just keeps getting better and better if I get a chance to see you like this too.”

“San Lang, please! Do you ever tire of making me look like a tomato?” Honestly. Consider Xie Lian’s poor blood vessels.

“No.” Hua Cheng snuggles up to him, smugly rubbing his face into his soft fluffy hair. “Never. Tell me how you were like as a child?”

Xie Lian’s brows knit together in thought and then he answers honestly, “I was a brat.”

Helpless chuckles are muffled into his hair. “Oh really?” Xie Lian picks at the leather boots under him in retaliation, yet the arms around him just tighten.

“I was! I had rooms of toys–”

“And of swords?”

“Yes, and of swords too, they were separate chambers. I made castles out of gold leaf cards and demanded to continue sleeping with my mother far after it was considered appropriate.”

“Now that's a request I would never reject.”

Xie Lian smacks Hua Cheng’s arm with his tiny palm. It just makes the chest behind him shake more with glee.

“What else did you like to do?” Hua Cheng nuzzles the tiny god, the hair jewelry poking dangerously but he doesn't care. He adores how Xie Lian fits completely in his arms with this new size.

It's a good size. He loves this size.

Xie Lian chews on his lip. It was a long time ago. That part of his life barely a blur, a wisp of light if he concentrates too hard it'll flicker away. “I remember I used to like playing on the...swings.”

Hua Cheng’s whole posture straightens. “I need to find a swing set immediately.”

“That’s not important.”

“I assure you it’s suddenly very important. To me. I need to push you on the swings.” To Xie Lian's absolute dismay, the man gets up and his own feet dangle as Hua Cheng settles him over his shoulders. Like a father with a child. The dice reappear and rattle as they land in Hua Cheng's palm.

"Shouldn't we care about finding out how to break the curse first? That should be our first priority!" He's careful to rest his hands on the crown of Hua Cheng's head, making sure not to jostle the eyepatch.

"Later."

Xie Lian sighs and plops his chin on top of his hands exasperated. The moment Hua Cheng has left the Manor when they hit the street, the eyes of every nearby ghost bulge and pop.

No one can resist not saying anything.

"MY LORD WHEN DID YOU GET A CHILD?" The phrase has more heads whipping in their direction.

Over at a vendor, a ghoul squints and then screams, "WAIT, IS THAT GRAND UNCLE?"

Xie Lian doesn’t have any time to swear. Not when a twitter of painted ladies screech and bombard the pair, "LET US TOUCH HIM. HE'S SO PRETTY. HOW DID HE GET SO SMALL?"

"A curse," Hua Cheng says. "And no. You do not get to touch him."

Surprisingly, or unsurprisingly more merge with their group, it becoming in a strange parade as the curious trail behind them. There are hunched goblins with moldy green skin that run a few paces before giggling at the sight. Ghost flames that hover playfully darting here and there. From the willow female sirens to the largest ogre they fall in line with brightest horrible grins. A few offer Xie Lian odd sweets made from rather questionable ingredients.

"TRY THIS LITTLE GRAND UNCLE, MY SUGAR SPIDER WEBS ARE THE BEST!"

"NO HE'S TOO SCRAWNY, HE NEEDS MORE MEAT ON THOSE BONES. HERE. HAVE MY ARM! I DIPPED IT IN CARMEL FOR YOU."

Others wave an assortment of meat buns as close as they dare since no one has forgotten that one time in the gambler's den.

“COME ON, EAT SOMETHING PLEASE! OH, YOUR FACE IS SO CUTE. LOOK UP FOR US SOME MORE." Xie Lian firmly buries his face into Hua Cheng's hair and shakes it back and forth.

"Make them stop." He begs. “Please.”

Hua Cheng hums. "Now, now don’t ruin their fun Gege. We've become a proper Ghost Parade by now. Why I don't think I could stop them even if I tried. You know how they get when you 'visit,’ you're just that popular."

Xie Lian groans.

"WHERE ARE WE GOING, MY LORD?"

Hua Cheng's eye twinkles. "Your dear Grand Uncle has told me he used to like playing on the swings, so we are on a quest to find them. Any idea where we may find some nearby?"

The colorful crowd goes wild. "SWINGS? DOES ANYBODY KNOW ABOUT SWINGS?”

“NAH!”

“NO.”

“I’VE GOT AN IDEA. WE CAN MAKE SOME. RIGHT NOW. DON'T MOVE."

In seconds what used to be a simple plaza becomes the weirdest playground Xie Lian has ever seen. The 'swings' are made from chains the large monster butchers carry around and they connect to three or four large thighbones tied together with pretty silk ribbons.

Xie Lian hopes those bones are not human.

Let him hope.

Hopes are dashed when they tell him they were very enthusiastically donated.

Hua Cheng slowly settles him on swings and makes sure his fingers are wrapped around the chains securely. He fusses before pulling the swing back with a few steps. The crowd cheers.

Xie Lian wants to die.

He feels another kiss to his temple and huffs with a twist to his lips. He guesses he should let Hua Cheng have his own fun and amusement at his expense. He did when the demon was a child. And perhaps he shouldn’t ruin the entertainment the ghost inhabitants somehow crave. As lame as it is. Who wants to watch a child being pushed to extreme heights on a gory swingset?

But he did...really like the swings.

“Are you ready to fly, Little Prince?”

"Are you going to let me touch the ground anytime soon?"

"Nope."

And Xie Lian should have seen that coming too. Oh well. They’ll find the cure to this aliment...eventually.

“Then let’s see how high you can make me go. Can you make me ascend a fourth time, San Lang?” He dares.

Hua Cheng’s fingers tighten on the chains above his, a wicked smile in voice. “There’s only one way to find out, Dianxia.”

Only the ghost city witnesses the figure in white and silk fly so high but their master never lets the small boy fall.

Not once.

Not ever.

#tian guan ci fu #heaven official's blessing #my writing #kid fic #fluff

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scooperkin · 6 years ago

Note

I've seen someone draw the puppet with muscles (I have the picture on my phone)

Sorry I got a bit carried away with my insight on this and the fnaf characters, style and designs in the form of horror media so it’s long and under readmore

Forgive me for any writing errors, this was written on impulse and I probably won’t look into fleshing it out:

I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with art or portrayals of the Puppet with more human-based anatomy features but it’s tiring to see this non-stereotypical gendered entity/child’s toy that isn’t supposed to be presented as anything near human both for the in-universe creative of the children’s imaginations, but also as a horror character that is importantly keep vague because a as a horror character, the unknown of what it could be and it’s odd undefined behavior coupled with this vague humanoid but, UNhuman frame makes it scary to in-universe adults, as well as real fans.

So seeing it so commonly characterized as a shapely-human just ruins the original intent and just takes away my interest in whatever story or fanart is being presented to me. And while this is a personal opinion and really doesn’t matter in what content people should do as if it disinterests me I’ll move on but those who enjoy it will still enjoy it. And there also fan content I’ll still occasionally remain interested that present not just the Puppet but other fnaf characters in campier and, stylistic content; any more serious, spooky, horror or more faithful fan media that has both the Puppet and other FNAF characters portrayed more comfortably artistic light, such as the Puppet having a “motherly” body shape (most likely thanks to Living Tombstone’s FNAF 2 song), as well as Toy Chica’s already feminine body pushed further with more defined features about her body (*ahem* boobies). And notice again how a lot of this is more aimed at the more “feminine” of the cast.

Circus Baby, along with Ballora, are the only animatronics that ends up being drawn straight up as organic entities even when in the presence of their fellow Funtimes, still depicted as their more horrific, robot designs. It’s fine if they’re drawn as regular furries and Baby and Ballora as human women (or little girl), its a chosen style someone chose, and again this isn’t wrong just because I don’t find it interesting enough, it’s not my cup of tea and I move on. But, several times I’ve come to accounter, more organically designed characters often are reduced to basic human features in their design. The Puppet gets curvy, Ballora and Baby get real hair that fluffies and moves organically, Baby herself often made into a tiny cute friendly young girl. The (fixed) Mangle, and Funtime Foxy getting more curves and floof. And don’t even get me started on people who sexualize these characters to the point they’re just human bodies with cartoon heads to just be more comfortable with consuming not safe for work content of them, proving as well these character’s designs, in the long run, don’t matter in this nsfw work, but that’s a different subject on a different type of content for a different day. (And notice how all these characters are feminine? While Scrap Baby can be portrayed as a cute girl in fan content but Molten Freddy is still what he is in the game in his fan content.)

Circus Baby is highlighted by the fact she is a massive robot towering over even the tallest of men, a single eye of her’s can fit two if not four pairs of human eyes in it’s size. Her fingers, thicker than most children’s arms. Is TERRIFYING. And she’s supposed to be. She’s a horror game character. Her scale towers over adults, their parents, the protectors of their children. Her movements are jerky and uncanny, her stare to an older audience member or child can give them the creeps. But ultimately her design–safe, safe for children to run up to, and safe for a child to trust. While her existence and design as a whole in-universe and above the surface is so supposed to be a large child, an older sister, still young enough to play with you but old enough to trust to be alone with. But behind the stage, back underground, that’s not who she really is. I’ve never seen Circus Baby as a giant child as she is seen to the outside world, no because underground, in the darkness she’s kept, we’re shown the real her, the true her. She isn’t some dumb playful child, she is a discerning actor. And her “real” mental age can be debated and discussed among fans, but it’s clear she isn’t an arrogant child. And more specifically for me, I see her depicted as an actress. An actress who’s been conformed to take on this child role both on and off stage. She purposely has a voice higher, she purposely choices her innocent-word structuring. She’s acting, she’s Pretending for the sake of her own safety against this Location she’s in. When even being off character for a moment such as taking a rest off your stage gives you a painful shock. It’s not too unusual as several stars and actors, usually young and more impressionable ones are told to act a certain way even with off-screen. A good example of this is several child stars on the work of Disney Channel original series. They tell their actresses to dress a certain way, to speak in a higher voice, don’t be serious, always smile. Because it earns the trust and love from children viewers better than just, Bella Thorne or Miley Cyrus being her honest self off set to their younger fans. Too risky, keep your voice pitched up. And even though you’re 19 please, please don’t act like it, act younger, the kids won’t ever relate to you if you sound too old, if you act to old. So while Baby and the other Funtimes’ situation is a very exaggerated version of this (no don’t worry no disney stars are getting shocked when they don’t act hard enough) to the point that it’s a horror genre story about it makes sense why this is unsettling as a player and in the Funtimes’ shoes.

So while Baby does everything to keep pretending, this is something Ballora can’t do. Ballora can’t pretend, she refuses. She refuses to pretend when under the surface away from the crowds and people, where she’s alone and can be herself. But she doesn’t get that, she gets shocked and ends up being scooped to “fix” her. Too much free will. Foxy isn’t explored as much but I feel goes through the same trouble as Ballora. And the only one who is seemingly left unpunished is Funtime Freddy, not even getting his own room, just stored somewhere until it’s time for a show. It’s implied he’s either the least sentient out of the cast or the one who acts closest to his original programmed personality. But either reason leaves him unpunished, not locked away for safety and disobedience. He’s unpunished but left alone in a single storage room. But whoops maybe having him follow his programming better than the others wasn’t the best idea. As he gets confused to when he’s on or off stage, when he should be sleeping, forgetting this hug is too tight for a child, or that said child is actually an employee that happened to go into the Breaker Room and is in fact not a birthday boy.

So Baby is unsettling both by design, in context, as well as her history, being created by the infamous William Afton making her again, do things she didn’t want to. So when I see her turned down into cutesy little teen girl or small child, and portrayed as such, I can’t help but again lose interest. And once again this is more of a personal preference, that isn’t how I understood Baby to be, or that she needed to be fixed from a large scary robot to cutesy bab. But it’s how others want it and I step away.

And I know this sounds like I’m going everywhere with this, and barely has to do with your ask, but I fear my post may have been mistaken as I feel this ask is talking about a way people shouldn’t draw or portray the Puppet when I wasn’t trying to say and I’m sorry if it came across that way.

As it stands a muscular portrayal of the Puppet is harmless, and a rarity in re-contributing fan media when compared to the more favored “curvy” puppet design trend. And of course these portrayals are no big deals in the end, and it’s just a preference but, I see more and more young artists following these trends because they seem more normalized. And no it’s not the original artists, of the young artist’s lack of understanding but, the fact that a lot of the fnaf fandom doesn’t treat fnaf like the horror media it is. Which is fine on it’s own, but when it’s brought up, I can’t help but look at a large side of fans like I’m looking at a Happy Tree Friends AMV with a song like this. Yeah Happy Tree Friends is a disturbing creation on it’s own but it’s not because it’s done in seriousness and the fact it’s cutesy IS what makes it disturbing, not any relevance it has to a subject or stories its trying to tell. So paired with a song as intestine and serious in tone as this one just seems…. silly. The editor wanted it to be horrific and scary but with the content at hand… it’s nearly impossible to do and takes a lot of figuring out to make work and only a few horror media can pull it off. And once again maybe this is just a me problem and how I intake content, for me FNAF is a horror story, a tragedy, it keeps you up at night not because the fiction itself is scary, but the contents implied and the contents hinted. Freddy Krueger was a sadistic child murderer in life because it was the evilest and scariest human conduct he could think of. And it’s why it’s so disturbing in FNAF that this ominous purple figure for the first few games was clouded in mystery and terrifying because while Krueger he killed innocent children, the purple figure was scarier over the fact he worked with these children, and he might still have worked with said children and he was Never caught and we didn’t even know his name back then. But we, the player saw him. Then we’re given just his vague actions of not only killing innocent children for no rhyme or reason (and any reasons at the time being just as horrifying )he then“Stuffed the victims in the animatronics” makes you think about how utterly disturbing that is. How did he even manage to do that, how did they not find him, that’s so horrible? And if the Puppet did that, why? The Puppet is vaguely sympathetic or is it? Because why would it do something so disturbing and as horrible as stuffing children into metal suits to the point their blood and organs leaked out, even in the name of “saving” them. It’s still horrible! It’s still tragic!

So when I see attempts at acknowledging in the horror in FNAF I want to give reminders that despite everything, Baby was HORRIFYINGLY big, looked had a cuteness that leaves people with the uncanny feeling of a porcelain doll’s stare. (as well as Ballora’s horrific treats being based off that).

That the Puppet despite everything it’s not a human, and has never been shown to bend in the same way a human can, and when it does move its arms and legs are still stretched out in space as it jumps in to kill you.

And to keep aspects like this when creating fan horror content or original horror content. The simplest of choices are usually the best ones, the feeling of being unable to move while your vague unknown attacker's inch closer and closer, to walk blindly in the dark with dangerous creatures. And in the end of this scary tragedy, or wanting things to be happy again, trying to solve the mystery, trying to make the horrible less horrible, only death awaited. For all of us.

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