#me to myself rn: be brave post it be brave

[fredmundo]

below the break is the first chapter of my oshamir fic. i don't know if it's any good. i've been too depressed to edit and work on it since the news so here it is.

any feedback, comments, interaction, whatever would be so appreciated and loved. i think i just need to post this here, in a space that loved this series along with me to hopefully inspire me to write the other 8 chapters i plotted lol

please forgive any errors but feel free to send corrections to my inbox

so yeah, untitled oshamir fic ch. 1

Osha thought there would be a heaviness to her steps when she walked onto the Stranger’s ship. This ship was to carry her away from Mae, away from her home. It was to bring her to the island and a galaxy of unknowns. 

Osha had always hated the unknown, hated feeling unsure in her place growing up on Brendok, never quite feeling herself or like she belonged to herself. The feeling of unease never unfurled from her chest while she was at the academy. So she dreaded its arrival now on this ship, with the dangerous man.

But it never came. 

Osha had chosen this, freely. That grip on her chest never tightened when she thought about the Stranger and her agreement to train with him.

There was no fear burrowed in her heart but there was guilt and anger as they pulled away from the ground and entered the atmosphere.

Brendok was irrevocably stained once again. Stained with blood and the sour taste of hate.

Osha clicked on the com that she had earlier turned off. “What do I call you?” There was a twinge to her voice that she hated. She didn’t want to care that she had killed Sol, broken his heart with her mind. She wanted freedom. 

“Qimir. You may call me Qimir.” There was a crackle and pop sound in the comms that Osha made a mental note to look into when they returned to the island.

“Not Master?” The vitriol leaked into her words. She didn’t want to call him Master, didn’t want to be owned in such a way, under his power and control.

“Qimir will be fine.” It sounded like he was smiling.

“Okay. Qimir.” Osha tested the word, how it felt against her lips, on her tongue. “Where are we going?”

“Back to the planet. We will rest. Then we will train.”

That’s it? That’s all the information he was giving her? Frustration bled into her. 

Brzzt. Osha shut the comms off again. 

The waves crashed against the walkway, soaking stone beneath her boots. She hadn’t waited for the Stranger– Qimir. The weight of her choices suddenly felt like too much. 

She stared out at the sea, the violent waters that crashed against cliff sides and shores. She wanted to believe that she had only just opened her soul to these negative feelings, the anger and fear and desire, but she knew that was a lie.

Osha was born with this in her. 

Beneath the Bunta tree had always felt like a place of solace, of freedom, where Osha could be without prying eyes and expectation. The yellow leaves hung like curtains, swaying in the breeze. A blue and red Brendoki Flutterby flew in front of her. It seemed to dance on the wind with a freedom that Osha could only dream about.

Today was to be her and Mae’s Ascension. Mae couldn’t wait, she burned with the desire to be a witch and to be just as Mother Korril and Mama had hoped. Osha knew she didn’t want to be a witch, and didn't want to be constrained to a set of rules that felt like a hand around her throat.

She wanted what that flutterby had. And she hated the creature at that moment.

Osha reached out, pulling on the thread, and held that tiny creature still. It was at her mercy. What she willed, would be. 

But she didn’t want to deprive another creature its freedom like her was to be. She released her hold on the flutterby.

The sound of boots on the wet stone approaching her roused Osha from her memories.

Qimir slowly approached Osha where she stood at the edge of the water. While the planet was small, the island more so, Qimir knew he would feel drawn to her power on the biggest planet in the galaxy. 

He would feel her across the galaxy. She had quickly become intertwined in his being; the thread of the force tying them together.

Qimir stood near Osha now. Not as close as he wished to be but as close as he dared without any indication from her that his proximity was welcomed. When their eyes finally met, the thread that bound them together tugs him closer. He cannot help but be drawn into her orbit. 

He stepped closer until they were almost shoulder to shoulder. He reached out slowly, careful, and he dared to touch her. Qimir wrapped his hand, that monstrous thing that killed her friends and former teachers, that would kill again, around her own and the lightsaber she earned from Sol. His thumb dragged across her soft skin. 

Both their eyes turned to look out at the horizon, the sun above and the sea below them. The thread taut between them.

He had known. Known that she didn’t need his words or guidance at that moment. Known that what she needed was to be seen and accepted.

Osha knew that he could see her, could see that warring her spirit between who she had been told to be her entire life and who she was choosing to be.

So he didn’t say a word, just looked at her. He never looked away from her. As soon as he had seen her, dressed as Mae, coming into that damned apothecary, Qimir knew he wasn’t going to look away. He could feel a kinship in her through the force. He could feel her power. 

“KRIFF!” Osha roared in frustration from where she laid. The soft grass of the plateau they were training on had concealed a stone that now dug into her shoulder.

“Your stance is good but you are fighting too much like a jedi, too controlled.” His easy voice, buttery, normally would be welcomed but with her back jabbed by a rock, his voice felt grating.

Growling out, “aren’t you supposed to be fixing that?”

They’d been training every day for the last few weeks, since returning to this planet, Osha did not know the name of it, it wasn’t charted as far as the Republic was aware. Every day, Osha wound up on her back, having failed to best Qimir. Though, her stamina was returning and the feeling of a weapon, even if it was just a wooden staff, had stopped feeling foreign to her.

“Getting rather angry, Osha.” He draws out the sounds of her name, pulling at her seams with that elongated second syllable. He clicked his tongue, tutting at her for her rage. He knew the more he picked at her, the angrier she would get. He wanted her to unleash herself from the cage she insisted on putting herself in.

The sound of his tongue clicking, as if he disapproved of her emotional outburst, brought only more anger to the surface. Osha shoved up from the earth, picked up that sparring staff. Her grip was a vice, knuckles white, as she took her stance. Normally, this is where Sol would’ve scolded her, told her to cool her mind of the fire that burned her now. 

But Qimir liked the fire, asked for her to burn him, too.

“O-sha,” the insolent man continued to tease her. Goading her into striking him.

Moving fast, Osha closed the distance between them, striking out with anger, something she was told to never do. She let it fuel her strikes against Qimir. He moved easily to block her but she was also able to block the counterstrike he threw at her. 

“Good, Osha.” His voice had lost that teasing lilt and was now filled with pride. He stepped back, signaling to her to pause in her attacks. “But you need to be–” She struck at him again, feeling a rush of exhilaration at his barely having blocked the blow in time.

���Unpredictable?” She continued to strike, moving to control the momentum of the fight, pushing him in the direction she wanted, toward the plateau’s edge. 

Of course, he determined her goal. With whatever strength he’d buried, he quickly turned the tides against Osha. He kept her on her back foot, pushing her back across the plateau. 

With a strong final series of moves, Qimir hooked his own staff around hers and twisted, and Osha’s staff was ripped from her grip. But he didn’t stop at disarming her, with another move he brought the staff behind her left knee pulled. Her stance now wider than comfortable, unbalanced, he easily took her feet out from under her and Osha’s back met the hard earth again.

Another rock found its home in her spine. “Kriff! Gods! You nerf-herder, bastard!” Osha cursed up at Qimir, who was laughing.

“Quite the mouth on you. Not very Jedi of you.” The tease was back in his voice. He laughed lightly, there was affection for Osha that she was unused to.

“I worked on starships for 6 years. Cursing is a job requirement.” She reached under her and grabbed the offending rock and threw it at him. He of course, dodged it, a smile still plastered on his handsome face.

Yes, in her own thoughts, at least, Osha could admit that Qimir was beautiful. With a jawline that sharp it would be hard to believe that he could look soft, that his eyes could be anything but filled with anger. But now, they were bright with subtle crinkles, sunlight bouncing off his perfect tanned skin. 

“That was much better.” He turned that perfect smile in her direction, offered her a hand.

“I still ended up on my back.” Osha didn’t feel like it had been all that better of a showing. Her back was definitely going to show bruises. 

“Yes,” he righted her onto her feet. While he dropped her hand, he didn’t move to step away from her. His right hand lifted and pulled grass from her locks. “But you fought without restraint. You ignored whatever combat rules the Jedi pretend exist.” His eyes move around her face and head, checking that she is free of earth, before locking with her eyes. 

He still hasn’t moved back.

Qimir knew he should step away from her. She often sought out space, having grown comfortable with isolation after her years as a mechnic, but he couldn’t bring himself to just yet. Staring into her dark brown eyes that Qimir could swear contained stars with how bright they shined after a bit of praise slipped across her skin. Or when she felt powerful and strong. 

Qimir found himself waiting for these moments of closeness with Osha, moments where she wasn’t so guarded. 

But he wouldn’t push, wouldn’t risk her abandoning him. He could’ve handled Mae leaving him, there was never this level of connection. He had seen her anger and thought there was more to her but he now knew that he was simply waiting for Osha. Whatever depth he had seen in Mae was just Osha, through the force and the way they’d been made. 

But she is still just looking at him. 

He still doesn’t move away. The hand that had been clearing grass from her hair now bravely moves to cup her cheek. His thumb lightly brushed across her cheekbone and soft, brown skin. 

If he could live in this moment, he would. “You should never cage yourself, Osha. The Jedi saw your power and were afraid of it and did everything they could to erase entire parts of you. But you shouldn’t continue their work. You deserve freedom.”

Her heart raced, breath pumped into her body and he spoke. It was like Qimir could look through her, into her. He understood her and he encouraged her.

You deserve freedom. That was all Osha has ever longed for. Since beneath the Bunta tree, to the academy, to working as a mechnic, and now in this moment. Osha craved freedom.

“We should wash. And I would like to check your injuries from today.” Osha nodded at him and finally took a step back from him. 

He gathered the staffs and his bag that seemed to go with him everywhere. He moved toward the path down, toward the beach and tide pools. 

“Qimir,” Osha called and he paused and turned. “I do want freedom. I don’t want to be,” Osha mulled over the word he had used. Caged. Had the Jedi really done that to her? Put her into a box and locked her away? Had Sol? She felt the word drop out, the sentence she had meant to finish. 

He smiled at her but it was almost sad like he could see that she was struggling with the realization that she had been hurt by the Jedi. “Come on, Osha.” She could almost feel him saying, save that for another day.

Osha followed him, lengthening her strides to catch up and walked next to him.

The water of the pools was cool but not cold and it felt like heaven against her skin. Qimir had entered the pool first, swimming straight ahead and never looking back toward Osha, giving her privacy to undress.

Qimir didn’t need privacy. He liked to feel her eyes on him while she desperately tried to not let her gaze linger. 

Now the water lapped at her back, the skin warmer with injury was now cooled and it took most of Osha’s concentration not to moan at the relief. Osha worked through her routine now, letting her focus shift from the man in the water to herself. Dunking herself under the water, wetting her hair and working what was left of her soapstone through her hair and across her body. Ensuring a thick, even coat of soap across her hair, she dunked under the cool waters once again and shook her hair, spreading out like a jellyfish’s tentacles, floating through the water.

Osha always thought of her mother when she washed her hair, and remembered the peaceful moments of her childhood when her mother had taught her how to care for her hair. Mother had always shown her that pride and care of oneself wasn’t a bad thing but a beautiful thing. Since having left the Jedi, Osha had been trying to relearn this and relearn how to value herself. At the academy, they teach you to lose yourself, not to take pleasure in small acts of self gratitude and expression. 

They don’t do this to be evil though it is sometimes still the case. They discourage any affection to your life before the academy and for Osha that meant losing a thread to her mother and herself. 

Now, here in this water, hair washed, as Osha floated in the water, she let herself feel connected to her mother in a way she hadn’t felt for sometime. 

Osha missed her mother more than ever now. She missed her mother’s soft hands when they would plait her hair just so to match with Mae. She missed her mother’s encouraging voice as she would walk Osha and Mae through their training. She would give anything to hear her voice again, soft and silky with a touch of smoke.

Her final moments with her mother had been bittersweet. But she was grateful to have gotten to be wrapped in her arms one last time.

Before she was killed.

“Osha,” Qimir’s voice skimmed across the water, “are you okay?” The sound of water sloshing as he slowly made his way over to where Osha swam.

Osha nodded, turned to face him, not knowing tears coating her face until she locked onto his eyes. His brow scrunched in concern and his mouth opened slightly at the sight of pain. “I’m alright. Just thinking about my mother.”

He still swam closer. “Tell me about her.”

This pulled at something in Osha. She’d never been encouraged to speak about her. Sometimes, while at the academy, she had been afraid that she would forget her mother entirely.

But here was this man, deadly and full of emotion, everything the Jedi had warned against, and yet, he met her with a kindness she hadn’t expected.

So she does. She tells Qimir about her mother, everything she can think of from how she looked and walked, to the power she could command, to sneaky trips out for spice creams and how much she wishes she wasn’t dead so that Osha could tell her that she was right.

And Qimir listens. Floating there in the water, getting wrinkled for how long he lets Osha ramble, and he laughs with her at happy stories, and lets Osha work through her pain at the hard moments when her voice lodges in her throat.

When they finally climbed out of the pool, the sun rose just past its apex in the sky. They’ve only just reached the cave but Osha doesn’t get settled like they usually do. Normally, Osha will rest or write, like she did when she was a child, and Qimir will craft cortosis armor. But today, Osha drops her training equipment and trades them for tools.

With the tools, Osha turned to head out to the ship, wanting to get to work before the path became obscured under the waves.

Qimir noticed that Osha wasn’t taking her usual spot on the mat and opening her journal.

A spike of fear erupted in his chest, “where are you going?” Qimir wouldn’t stop her from leaving him, wouldn’t deny her freedom of choice. But Gods, he was afraid to lose her, afraid to be alone. He followed her out the cave but not down the path.

“I noticed a popping sound in the ship’s communications that I wanted to fix.” She didn’t fully turn around, just through the reasoning back at him over her shoulder.

Oh. That was a relief to Qimir. Slightly embarrassed that his immediate thought was that he was being abandoned, betrayed.

“Fixing the communications systems,” he gave a breathy laugh, “I would’ve thought that you’d be sick of the sound of my voice by now.” He smiled, remembering her cheeky muting of him during their first passage to Brendok.

“Yes, well,” she was shouting back at him, having turned as she still made her way down the path toward the ship, “who says I’m not?” She smiled brightly at him. Turned and continued on her way.

She hadn’t brought anything with her except her tools. Not even her saber. She wasn’t going to leave him, at least not today. Qimir let himself be soothed by the thought. He returned to the desk where he worked to forge her a gauntlet of cortosis.

[jelliebeanbitch]

aaaaa theater is such a fucked up line of work. we are bonded for life man what do you mean it’s the last show and we never work with this same beautiful group of people again? you mean we’ll never be here again as we are???? fucking excuse me???????

[chloelouygo]

I bought a linkin park cd today and my mum has already stolen it for her car-

[danothan]

i love having dc mutuals! would love to follow one some day…

[phagodyke]

SUDDENLY STARTED RAINING SO HARD WE ARE SO FUCKING BACK

[yermes]

PAC: 🦢

How do you speak to the divinity within you?

Well y’all just to be clear I did curse someone recently so you guys are getting more wholesome readings so that when I die the good lord doesn’t send me too deep into hell. Anyways im on a trip rn and I am struggling. But one thing that helps when i am struggling I feel as though I am so open for grief to hit me on any bright a sunny spot. I posted on my private insta story and someone said they missed me and hoped I was okay which was honestly the nicest thing I heard about myself all week.

Disclaimer: please take what I say with a grain of salt and not as the gospel. I just want to share some ideas of practicing and giving advice using the medium as often as I can with school, work, and my own personal studies and practice. But I am working on sharing my notes soon so that will be exciting!

Socials: TipJar | Gram

Pick a meme

The cards

Pile 1

Man + Garden 🪴 

I think your divinity with in gives you signs and connects you with people. I am not sure how because I believe that usually people keep that inner world protected. I think the people you surround yourself with you would like to think that you all help lift each other up in a human ladder towards god possibly to escape any mental shit within you but you forget the connection you feel for each other and the magic you do that IS the divine.

Pile 2

Dog + Bear 🐻 🐕 

The divine within you manifest in your joy and will. You yourself have the ability to brave each day and sprinkle a little light into other peoples lives. That gift is not to be counted out. Anyone who can act as a conduit to reflect the light within everyone is a gift. You show this through a strong and kind nature.

Pile 3

Ring + Coffin ⚰️ 💍 

With in the small deaths in everyday life the divine presents itself to you. Life and death, a marriage or funeral it is always present. And with the divine persistence through the changes in your life you can feel that you will be okay. Even if you are not okay ATM the changes in which you encounter only build the relationship between you and the divine.

Extras:

Story/vent:

Go off and prosper my children

[liesmyth]

top 5 royjamie / ted lasso fics!

picking 5 was like pulling teeth. I probably left out many faves but as we know the economy is tough rn

let it come down by @antspaul, amazing showstopping exceptional 1970s AU that is SO immersive and SO bittersweet and I need to go lie down just thinking about it.

One cold Manchester night in 1978, good-for-nothing Jamie Tartt comes across his childhood hero at a punk show.

the rookie by @belmottetower & @scoatneyhall. I'm being soo brave and limiting myself to only one Bel&Hall fic and I pick this one because of the untapped endless potential of S2 AUs! This is Roy & Jamie with background Roy/Keeley and I enjoy the dynamic A Lot

“Well now, back home, our friends in the NHL have this little tradition that I think might just be the solution to our problems. Sometimes, when a rookie is signed to a team, especially a younger player, someone who maybe needs a guiding hand, a bit of looking out for, they’ll move in with the captain, right into his home, when they first start out. Obviously Jamie isn’t new new, but he definitely needs a guiding hand. So how about it?” Roy stares in disbelief. “Fuck off. This is a joke, right?” (Roy and Jamie move in together)

Roy Kent's Dramatic but Inevitable Jamie Tartt Induced Bisexual Awakening by chelicerata. There's no description I can offer that will make this fic justice. Go read it!

When Roy’s world gets turned upside down, it’s because of Jamie. Fucking typical.

therefore, dark past, by @mykingdomforapen Gen! Jamie-cenytric. THEEE definitive Jamie & his dad fic (written pre S3), to me. It's so multifaceted and human and I love the ending very much.

“Christ, Jamie, he’s dying,” Dad said. His voice did something weird–it hitched. “What, you’re gonna pencil him in your busy celebrity schedule? Squeeze your own granddad in between your ickle interviews and your fancy dinner dates? My old man is fucking dying.” OR: Jamie breaks the cycle.

tied up in this yoga knot by @reinvent-and-believe. This is a 5 times / slice of life / getting together post-canon fic and it's guaranteed to improve my mood every time I read it.

The absolute worst person Roy can imagine meeting the yoga mums is Jamie Tartt. Not to mention, Jamie would inevitably pick up on how many hours Roy spent drinking rosé and glaring daggers as Jamie fucked his way through the cast of Lust Conquers All. And that sounds fucking exhausting.

[jellybeanium124]

pathetic vent post lol

so the thursday before last, one of my coworkers told me she's quitting bc she got a job in the field she wants to have a career in. I was happy for her and told her so, but I also felt kind of sad, because she's a woman close in age to me and I've been thinking we could be friends if I wasn't technically her boss for a little while now. so finally near the end of our shifts (we were closing) I buck up and ask if her she'd want to exchange contact info and stay in touch and hang out after she left.

and y'all she looked so happy and excited to be asked that. absolutely 0 hints that her delighted response wasn't genuine. so she puts her number in my phone, and even takes a silly picture for the contact pic, and I send a test text and she responds to confirm it's her correct number.

on monday I text her about hanging out later in the week, with ideas. on tuesday I text her again, with new ideas if she didn't like my first ones. I didn't mean to double text two days in a row.

nothing.

I wait till yesterday and send her one last text, explaining that I really do wanna be friends, I am more chill outside of work and she's only seen Work Nina if that's what she's worried about, but that I don't wanna bother her.

it's been over 24 hours now, and nothing. part of me wonders if she changed her mind and blocked my number.

it's just really disheartening because I've had another person string me along and then not respond/continually cancel on me pretty recently. after my college friend group broke up thanks to the serial sexual predator (which is a whole nother story, dw he didn't do anything to me, in fact he refused to talk to me the first time we met when I introduced myself and tried to make polite small talk, and I realized several months later that he didn't engage with me at all because he didn't wanna fuck me 🙃) things have been kind of dire in the irl friends department and it's sad and pathetic and I thought finally here was a girl I really connected with, and she liked gossiping with me at work, and she seemed really really excited at the possibility of being real friends with me, and then nope... not a single response to any of my texts. zip nada zilch.

it's just hard... I was basically socially rejected by everyone in my film program at my uni, then I finally started to make friends at the jewish club and a serial predator with an apartment full of guns who sells stolen lego sets on ebay and does cocaine ruins that, and then I'm at work and now that I'm a manager I'm the boss of most people there and I wouldn't be close friends with most of them anyways and the one girl who I think I could be really close friends with fucking ghosts me after I was brave enough to ask if she'd wanna be friends. it's been like five straight years of rejection for me. I always had friends in k-12, I wasn't a "popular kid" but I was well liked among the venn diagram of gays, nerds, theater kids, and band kids and I had a lot of friends in high school. I don't fucking know what happened. and now I'm on meds that are finally giving me energy and happy chemicals so I wanna go out, I wanna do stuff, I wanna walk around, and I don't wanna be an apartment slug anymore but I don't have anyone to do anything with and there's only so much fun you can have by yourself. and I'm still too shy to go to a bar alone because I know I'll stand in the corner paralyzed by social anxiety. I'm trying bumble bff rn but I'm so shit at responding to people and I kinda hate myself for it and I'm trying to do better but I keep not responding to people for too long and yeah maybe my ex-coworker is stuck in that cycle too idk.

oh yeah and the whole past year of antisemitism makes everything worse because I'm deeply realistically afraid that any goyim I meet are going to be hateful hamasniks <3 so that's a fun lil bonus.

jesus man... idfk. it's just shitty. it's just fucking shitty.

[starlightseraph]

love to the brave antis!

i’m being so serious rn when i say that if you’re part of the rpf circle (and that specific one) then please get the fuck away from me and my asks and my posts.

i spent a while hate-reading and rubbernecking, but i was strong enough to block all the major players and i’ve almost entirely kept them blocked. if my inbox last time i mentioned this was anything to go by, clearly some of y’all couldn’t do the same to me.

if you’re in the good omens/staged fandom or a fan of david tennant and michael sheen and somehow aren’t aware, there are a bunch of disgusting blogs that have been spewing hatred and conspiracy theories, for years in some cases. these include but are not limited to: that georgia tennant and anna lundberg baby trapped the guys (with like every kid they’ve had, because david and michael have clearly been on the edge of leaving them so many times), that georgia is repeatedly raping david (???), that she’s abusing him and he’s afraid of her, that david and georgia’s kids hate georgia because they recognise the abuse and are disgusted by it, that anna is some maniacal villain who always planned to trap an established actor because she can’t do anything, that she hates michael, that david and michael are in a sexual and romantic relationship, that they they want to leave their partners for each other, that they already have left their partners in secret, that david and georgia have gotten divorced and are living apart, that georgia’s dad set up her and david on purpose (outside of his influence in getting her the role that they met on), that georgia and anna send coded messages to each other and to followers with the songs they use on instagram stories, that georgia was a criminal-level stalker who baby-reindeer’d david into marrying her, that the four of them have a pr firm that’s orchestrating every flick of their eyes but that this firm is failing miserably by telling them to turn down the heat between david and michael while forcing them to drag georgia and anna along wihh them, and that anyone who doesn’t agree with these rpf blogs is homophobic and wilfully ignorant.

they send death threats to and dox people who dare to say anything against them, i’ve gotten threats myself. @dtmsrpfcringe has gotten wishes of ill on her children and she’s been told that her family doesn’t exist and she’s making them up or is delusional. i myself got death threats and a bunch of abuse on anon for my relatively tame posts on this shit. i was fairly early to the game, i think my first post on the situation was 10ish months ago, and they have radicalised more and more since then. i’m not up to date on their latest insanity— i’ve had them blocked for a long while for my own mental health— but i’m not gonna let the brave people behind the aforementioned blog and others get absolutely vile messages without saying anything.

now i wanna make myself very clear: rpf is fine! real person fiction is fine! i personally don’t like it, but i have no ethical objections as to why others shouldn’t. using the names and likenesses of real people for fun and silly little stories on ao3 is totally ok. but it crosses a line when y’all present the stories as an “investigation” or claim that they’re objective reality. some of the followers of these blogs have admitted to messaging georgia and anna directly about this, and there have also been a few comments on their instagrams that seem fuelled by this stuff, proving that their claims of staying quietly on their own corner of the internet are bullshit.

if anyone’s interested, my old posts on the matter are here: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. they’re all months old and quite out of date by now, as i’ve been pretty good at keeping the blogs blocked, but i do think they include some well-written points (much better than this post lol, i just woke up). something has changed though; i say in one of the posts that i’d have no problem with the theories being true, but the blogs have since begun more proudly displaying some truly insane accusations, which i would absolutely have a huge fucking problem with.

anyways. most of the new stuff i’ve seen comes from tori and co, see dtmsrpfcringe and the council (lol) for more, if you want to see a bunch of wonderful people fighting a shit show to protect the fandom.

[elliotts-personal-property]

I Think I Love You (Joe Elliott x Reader)

A/N: Hey y'all, as promised here's the Joe one shot. Feeling super nervous rn, considering this is the first time I’ve posted my writing on here. I'd love to hear your feedback so I can improve on my writing. I'm open to any and all constructive criticism and encourage it! Anyways… I won't keep stalling for any longer. I hope y’all enjoy this one!!

Warnings: Mentions/references to making out/smut but nothing actually explicit happens.

Ps, if you really want to feel the vibe of this one shot I'd suggest listening to "I Think I Love You" by The Partridge Family while reading this💗

With love, Kris<3

-

Sheffield, 1982

I'm sleeping

And right in the middle of a good dream

Like all at once I wake up

The poor guy had been tossing and turning all night.

Joe couldn't get his mind off of you.

Just the thought of you disrupted his sleep.

From something that keeps knocking at my brain

In his eyes you were perfect. You were the only girl in the world he wanted. Of course that also meant you were the one girl, who in his eyes, had got away. The one he could never have. Why? Because you were his best friend.

For months upon months he was stuck in this endless cycle.

It went a little something like this:

He'd think about you so much so that he'd convince himself that he had to go tell you.

Then he'd work up the courage to say it.

He'd find the perfect time to confess but then start to reconsider his choice. He always would hold it back when he decided it wasn't a good idea after all.

He'd then go back to thinking about how perfect of a moment it would've been and mentally kick himself for not saying a thing.

And the cycle would repeat.

It went on and on and on.

Before I go insane

As a result of this, he hadn't had a good nights sleep in a while.

That night was different though.

I hold my pillow to my head

Something had finally snapped.

And spring up in my bed

He had known how he felt for a long time. But he had never actually come to terms with the gravity of it.

Screaming out the words I dread

I think I love you

All at once it hit him like a brick wall. He realized he truly loved you.

-

On the rare occasion that your best friend felt brave he'd indirectly hint at something more. After a while of not getting any knowing looks from you he just assumed that you were oblivious to all of his side comments. You in fact were not.

After a while you started to get impatient with him.

You wanted to shout it out loud, right in his face, "Dear God Joe just ask me out already!"

Recently those side comments from Joe had stopped. You would've said something to him if he hadn't stopped. But now you weren't even sure if he still cared, or if he had just given up and moved on. It would be stupid to lose your friendship over this. So you stayed quiet just to be safe.

It was a shocker to both you and everyone else how you two hadn't gotten together already.

There were so many signs. It was only a matter of time.

-

This morning

I woke up with this feeling

I didn't know how to deal with

Another night of restless sleep had gone by. It was worse than usual, so much so that by dawn he had already come up with a plan.

He knew what he had to do. He was going to tell you the only way he could. In the only unique love language he knew, through music.

If he was gonna do it, it had to be big and flashy. Joe wouldn't have it any other way.

He couldn't let his feelings lie dormant anymore. No, he thought, this time will be different. This time I won't back out.

And so I just decided to myself

I'd hide it to myself

And never talk about it

He had kept his feelings to himself for the past few years. Joe wanted to tell you, he really did. But in the back of his mind he worried about ruining the relationship you guys already had.

Joe loved you so much that he was willing to hide his feelings just so you wouldn't walk out on his life. He didn't want to lose you over some feelings he had. Ones that he couldn't guarantee you'd reciprocate. So, he believed it was best to keep it to himself.

And did not go and shout it

When you walked into the room

I think I love you

Joe didn't just think, he knew.

Joe was dead set on what he had to do. He just needed to get a few things sorted. First off was getting the guys on board with it.

-

Joe gathered his closest friends together. They were less like bandmates and more like brothers to him. He knew they would help him out. All it would take was a bit of convincing.

"Can you please help me out?" Joe pleaded.

He assured them about his plan.

"It's just one, and it'll be real quick."

"Alright, fine," the bassist answered for them all, "What song is it anyways?"

Joe told them his song of choice and they all gave him odd looks.

Sav cocked an eyebrow at the song choice.

"The Partridge Family? Are you serious?"

Phil chimed in, "You really think a band like us should be playing a song like that?"

Steve rested his hand on his head, "Everyone's going to make fun of us."

Joe tried to defend his choice, "You know it can't be that bad. We're playing in a pub for god's sake. It's not like the whole world's gonna be there."

The rest of the guys seemed unconvinced.

"Come on guys, you said you'd help me. Please?"

He kept on.

"Just help a bloke out, alright?"

And on.

"Please I promise I'll never ask for anything ever again."

Rick half-whispered to Sav.

"You know he's never gonna let it up. Not until we say yes at least."

Sav knew he was right. Joe wouldn't stop bugging them until they agreed.

"Okay fine, but it's only one song."

Joe nodded enthusiastically, "Mhm yeah, just one."

It was settled, they would help. Now all that was left was to get you there.

-

I think I love you

So what am I so afraid of?

The thought of telling you was exciting to him, yet terrifying.

I'm afraid that I'm not sure of

A love there is no cure for

His heart raced as he drove over to your place.

I think I love you

Joe was already cheery about just the thought of you going.

Isn't that what life is made of?

He hadn't felt this excited over something in a long time.

As he pulled onto your street he tapped on the steering wheel. It was due to the mix of both the pure joy of excitement and an ever growing anxious feeling that was building up inside.

Though it worries me to say

That I've never felt this way

-

Believe me

You really don't have to worry

"You'll be there tomorrow, right?"

"Of course," you answered with a wide smile, "You guys go on at eight, right?"

God he loved your smile. It could light up any room.

He melted just looking at you. Anytime you spoke to him he lost all train of thought.

You snapped your fingers to get his attention.

"Joe?"

"Oh- um, yeah. Eight, we'll be on then."

I only wanna make you happy

After you said yes he began going through that same cycle again. He started doubting his whole plan. Wondering if it would work or not.

There was no way he could back out now though. For the past few days they'd been practicing that song, not stopping until Joe felt satisfied with the final product.

He wondered if you would stick around after all of this.

Would you tell him to "beat it" and move on with your life without him? Or would you stay there by his side?

And if you say, "Hey, go away"

I will

Joe crossed his fingers, hoping for the best outcome possible.

But I think better still

I'd better stay around and love you

He was determined to make sure you stayed.

Do you think I have a case?

Let me ask you to your face

Do you think you love me?

Tomorrow night he'd get the long awaited answer to that question.

I think I love you

-

You arrived early, wanting to make sure you were right up front. This is what you always did. It was your way of showing Joe you cared. You mindlessly tapped your fingers against the small stage, waiting for them to come out.

Meanwhile Joe was there fixing himself up in their tiny dressing room, (if you could even call it one). It was fairly small. The owner had "renovated" one of their small back rooms into a "dressing room".

He stood in front of the vanity mirror fluffing out the rest of his hair. Joe was doing any and everything in his power to keep his mind off of the plan. He looked at his reflection as he told himself to just smile and hope for the best. Whatever happens happens, it was no longer in his control anymore.

After waiting for what felt like forever the guys finally came out on stage. As Joe got on he stopped in front of you and sent you a quick smile before turning his attention to the other patrons of the bar.

You cheered along the whole time as they went through their usual set list. It didn't matter how many times you'd seen them, you were always captivated by their showmanship.

Time always seemed to fly by whenever you watched them play.

By now you had memorized their set list and were almost sure they were closing out now, having just played Wasted. They always saved it for last and were just about ready to leave.

That was before Joe had something to say.

The cheering in the room died down as Joe placed the mic back in its stand. He adjusted it right to his level, getting ready to speak.

"We have one last song for you all tonight. We're gonna take a little change of pace if that's alright with you."

He took a glance around at his bandmates, giving them all a quick nod before adding on.

"This one goes out to a very special someone. Someone who means the world to me."

His eyes drifted down to the people in the front row, moving one by one until eventually landing onto you.

"This is for you, Y/N."

Taking one last deep breath in he calmed himself before counting the guys in.

All of them started in, "Ba, ba ba ba, ba ba ba ba, ba."

You giggled at the ridiculousness of it before fully realizing the gravity of this song.

You knew what it was the second they sung the first line.

You hadn't heard it in such a long time and had practically forgotten about it, forgotten how much you loved it. It was always one of your favorites, and Joe had known that for a while now.

All thoughts completely left your mind when Joe began to sing.

"I'm sleeping,

And right in the middle of a good dream,

Like all at once I wake up,

From something that keeps knocking at my brain,

Before I go insane,

I hold a pillow to my head,

And spring up in my bed,

Screaming out the words I dread."

The rest of the guys joined in on the next line.

"I think I love you!”

This was his confession.

His eyes couldn't help but drift towards you.

"I think I love you."

While preforming Joe tried to keep his attention with the rest of the audience equal, but he kept on letting his eyes go back to you, like some sort of magnet that couldn't be pulled apart.

If him dedicating this song to you wasn't the most obvious thing, you'd say his looks alone were enough to tell you that this was for you.

You couldn't help but feel a smile tugging at your lips. Your cheeks started to feel sore from the excessive smiling.

"So what am I so afraid of?"

Every time his eyes caught yours you felt your heart skip a beat.

"I'm afraid that I'm not sure of a love there is no cure for."

Joe really did care about you, deep down inside he did, he always did.

Soon the song came to a close with their repeated "I think I love you's" becoming more and more quiet as they faded off.

They all came front and center, taking a short bow together as the crowd in the bar cheered them on.

The girl next to you had to have already been out of it.

"You're a lucky girl, huh?" she practically yelled into your ear. You couldn't blame her though, she was standing directly in front of an amplifier the whole time.

It snapped you out of the trance you seemed to have slipped into.

"Oh-uh yeah," you smiled.

"Look," she said, swinging her arm to point at the guys in front of you.

The rest of them were making their way off, leaving through the stage left.

Joe was the last one still up there.

You stayed staring at him in disbelief, not even knowing what to do. He had finally said it... or well sung it, same difference. What was there you could do?

He tilted his head to your right gesturing off to the side of the stage, to what you only could assume led to their dressing room.

He flashed you a quick smile before sending a subtle wink your way.

If it was anybody else, you'd say you were surprised by their actions, but for Joe? Well that's a different story.

With both of her hands the girl next to you latched onto your arm.

"Ooh looks like someone's gettin' some action tonight!"

Your cheeks flushed red and you prayed to god no one else heard.

Immediately you turned to Joe, hoping he hadn't heard the girl's remark.

His eyes darted away from you. Before Joe left you saw him trying to suppress his chuckling, but ultimately failing. His smug smile was the last thing you saw as he walked off the stage.

Of course he had to have heard it, why wouldn’t he?

The girl let go of you when you told her you had to leave. She told you something along the lines of, "Have fun tonight!" before you left.

You went around the corner finding the door that you guessed led backstage. The door was locked from the inside and there was no way of getting in. You didn't worry though, knowing that the guys would come out soon enough.

After a couple minutes of waiting by the door an ecstatic Rick swung it open. The rest of the guys shuffled their way out, but with their lead nowhere in sight.

You turned your attention towards the last member to come out.

"Is he?"

"Third door to the right," Sav answered before you could even finish asking your question.

"Thanks."

He gave you a warm smile, still holding the door open for you, letting you slip through to the back hallway.

"See you in a bit," he said, letting the door shut behind you.

Even though there was no reason to, you counted to yourself as you passed by each of the doors.

One...

Two...

You felt your heart race as you got closer to the last one.

...Three

You stood there for a moment trying to see if you could hear anything on the other side. You didn't and knew it was time to stop stalling.

After taking a deep breath to compose yourself you rested your hand on the cool doorknob.

Here goes nothing.

You slowly opened the door as quietly as you could and after shutting it watched the scene play out before you.

He stood there in front of a vanity mirror facing away from you. He hadn't noticed you but you could see his face clear as day through the reflection.

Joe was humming a tune while brushing his hair. You immediately recognized what song it was.

He was humming the one he had just played. His tone was full of pure joy.

Once he was done he ran his fingers through his hair, trying to shape it some more.

The man in front of you looked fine already but seemed to be getting ready for something more.

He adjusted the collar of his shirt before picking up a small bottle of cologne. Adding just a spray to his neck and one to his wrist before turning around.

Joe's humming abruptly stopped and his eyes widened.

"Oh… you're here?"

You'd been caught staring.

At this point any embarrassment that you could have had got washed away whenever he decided to dedicate that song to you.

"Sorry, I-"

"Don't be," he cut you off.

He set the bottle down and slowly approached you, seeming to take his time with it.

You watched carefully as he took every painfully slow step.

You didn't know where to start, but knew you had to say something.

"You guys were great."

"Thank you."

You had to bring it up, you couldn't bare to wait any longer.

"That song you played. Did you?"

You stopped, taking a quick glance around, noting that it was just the two of you in the room, before finishing.

"Did you really mean that?"

His gaze softened at the question.

"Yes."

He paused before stepping closer, leaving barely any room between the two of you.

"I meant every word of it."

Your heart sped up with every word he spoke.

"Y/N I mean it."

His hand moved up to tuck the loose hair behind your ear.

"I think I love you."

You had been longing to hear those words for such a long time. Never in your lifetime did you think it would happen, but it finally did.

He said that to you, and you only.

After all this time, you heard those three words you loved the most.

"I love you."

His hand moved down to cup the side of your face. You lightly nudged your face against his warm palm. Closing your eyes you took a deep breath in, wanting to smell more of the cologne that rested on his wrist.

When you opened your eyes his hand moved down to carefully tilt your chin up.

Your eyes faced him now.

"I love you too."

This was the moment. The moment you waited forever for.

Heart racing and eyes wide you both slowly drew in closer. It felt like the longest seconds of your life, waiting for him to connect with you.

You looked into his emerald green eyes before letting yours flutter closed.

Soon enough you felt the feather light touch on your lips. It felt like heaven to you.

You brought one hand up, letting you fingers run through his light brown hair.

You felt Joe's other hand reach down to the small of your back, gently pulling you closer into him.

All you could do now was relax your body and take in the overwhelming smell of his cologne.

After what felt like an eternity, the two of you finally pulled away from one another. You already missed the feeling of his soft lips on yours.

You refused to back up from him, leaving hardly any gap between you two.

His warm breath fell on your lips as he mumbled, "You don't know how long I've wanted this."

"Me too."

Joe's hands dropped down and his fingers latched onto the belt loops of your jeans before lightly tugging at them, pulling you closer.

Your hips were pulled forward and you lightly bumped against him before falling back and resting mere inches from him.

Joe's eyes quickly scanned over your face as if he was looking for a cue of some sort.

Though you had never seen this look on him before, you knew exactly what it meant.

"Please Y/N."

That short plea was more than enough to get you going.

Your arms almost instinctively wrapped around his neck, letting him know you were okay with it.

"Come on," he said, slightly lowering himself to reach the back of your legs. He lifted you up and stepped back to sit in the armchair placed in front of the mirror

Your legs were pinned close on either side of him, resting between his outer thighs and the arms of the chair.

Without warning the two of you crashed into each other once more, desperate for each other's touch.

He hummed into the kiss, making you relish in the feeling he gave you.

-

You didn't know exactly how much time had gone by, but you knew a decent amount had passed.

Slowly, you drew away from his neck and let out a shaky breath, still wanting more. It had now been a little while since you first got in there and you knew it would only be a matter of seconds until someone barged in looking for two of you.

Your eye contact with him continued as you calmed your breathing.

Lightly pushing yourself away, resting your hands on his stomach, you finally spoke up.

"We should go. They're pry wondering what's taking so long."

Joe thought about it for a second. Seemingly weighing the pros and cons of both staying and going.

"Who cares? Let 'em wonder."

You planted one last quick kiss before making an offer.

"How about later, yeah?"

A wicked smile spread across his face, already thinking of what was to come, "Yeah."

You pulled yourself off of him and tried to fix the newfound wrinkles in your clothes. After getting up he did the same and you stayed there fixing yourselves up.

Just as the two of you were about to walk out you stopped him.

"Wait."

He turned to you.

"You’ve got a little…," you trailed off as you brought your thumb up to the corner of his mouth.

"Something," you finished as you wiped the last bit of red lipstick off of him.

Feeling content with how the two of you looked, you set off out of the dressing room and back down the hallway.

He held the door open for you and led you out into the main room.

You both scanned your eyes around the bar floor trying to find the guys.

Joe grabbed onto your hand and held on as he guided you through the crowd. He led you over to the round booth where they were all seated. As you approached the booth he gave your hand a light squeeze before letting go.

It took only one glance at the you two for the teasing to start.

"Woah!" Phil exclaimed, "What happened in there?"

"Nothing," Joe replied making his best attempt at a deadpan tone.

"You sure about that?"

The rest joined in on by adding "ooohs," sounding exactly like a group of kids in elementary who just found out one of their classmates was called into the principals office.

This was only the beginning of the never ending teasing that was to come.

Phil raised his eyebrows, "Just couldn't wait until you got home, huh?"

Joe rolled his eyes at his bandmates teasing.

Sure you had been gone for a bit, but you knew there had to have been something else causing their reactions.

You looked between yourself and Joe quickly noticing the culprit.

Though you had made sure to get all your lipstick off his face you forgot to check the collar of his shirt. The sloppy kisses had caused you to completely miss his neck in some spots and just get his shirt. The shirt in question being a white one didn't help your case.

There was no sense in trying to rub it off now, and not like you could anyways.

Rick and Sav scooted around to make room for you and Joe.

As you sat down you both noticed all the other guys were already starting their night off with their drinks in hand.

Joe looked around at each and every one of them, "You started without us, aye?”

"We waited for a little while, but you guys took too long," Sav replied.

Joe turned to face you, "How 'bout a round?"

You smiled, "Sure."

-

Thank you so much for reading!! I hope you liked it💗

[kafus]

ok i've decided i want to infodump about vee and nova a little after all! because uhh not only am i impatient because autism but i also. want to dip my toes into talking about this. just days ago i was still terrified but now i am Tentatively Brave... if i can talk about it here casually like this then i should be able to write a more formal summary later some other time

i've tagged this post appropriately (at least i think i have, feel free to suggest if i should add more) but also a heads up here too before i keep talking that while i'm not going into graphic detail on anything there are STRONG themes of organized sexual abuse of a child, sexual abuse of animals, and grooming! (there are no disturbing visuals in this post, just text)

IF YOU CAN'T READ THIS POST THAT'S OKAY I STILL LOVE U

takes a deep breath alright so the deal with these two. back all the way in 2021, i decided i wanted to make "vent ocs" as in i just wanted some concrete/consistent designs i could use in vent art drawings that weren't a direct reflection of what i envision myself to look like or whatever. i was going through a lot in 2021, in december 2020 i had just gotten my first big repressed memory back and my life was in a whirlwind of change and heavily increased PTSD and DID symptoms, so i was using art a lot as an outlet. in the end i settled on this drawing, based on the design taste i would have had as a young person (god the quality is so old now LOL i've improved a lot but anyway)

i was intending for these two to be just visual designs and nothing more than that but i got attached and actually ended up giving them a whole storyline and everything, which is something i admittedly hadn't done in a long time up to that point so that's cool.

the reason i preface explaining the premise of the storyline with this is because i think it's important to acknowledge that these two are intrinsically tied with my real life and the feelings i experience as a CSA/OA survivor. not because i think someone has to go through awful things to write or draw about them necessarily, but because i am passionate about expressing myself. it's important for me to be seen in some way, to be heard after years of silence. it is not safe for me mentally to share the exact details of my abuse online rn (and please don't ask for them!) but i also don't want these two to be removed from the message that i survived something and this is me making art about that in an abstracted and magical way with a fictional universe that brings me a lot of comfort. i hope this makes sense lol

oh and also with that in mind if you think for even a second any of this is a weird sex thing for me or some shit please stop reading this post and go do something else with your time. this is my trauma expression and i don't need to be compared to the people i was abused by when i was a literal toddler thank you!

AANYWAY so! premise! gonna be point blank with it! vee (not her original name but shh) is born as a normal 100% human girl, aka without the eevee ears and tail. she is groomed from a very young age (like, toddler age) and eventually abducted by her groomers which happen to be members of... well right now it's team rocket because i haven't spent the time to worldbuild a new villainous pokemon organization yet. roll with me here. she is taken to a remote facility out in the middle of fucking nowhere and is never returned to her previous life or family.

Why? well i'm glad you asked! the org is running a bunch of different experiments in this facility and one of them happens to be trying to enable humans reproducing with pokemon. this doubles as both a money thing and a power thing. they seek out a child as the victim of these horrible experiments because children are easily malleable. way easier to control a child than an adult who already has a firm identity/self.

vee is the child they chose. surgery is forcibly done on her to give her working eevee ears and tail, and also like, fuck with her body chemistry and stuff. she's biologically part eevee now. yes this is bullshit pokemon magic science LMAO but she is kept in this facility and chronically sexually abused for a few years by pairing her with various mons and trying to get eggs to happen.

the experiment isn't working though so they hypothesize that giving her a dedicated partner, especially of the same evolutionary line, would help, and they raise nova from birth as an eevee to take on that role. eventually the two of them are paired together. despite the acts they are forced to commit on each other and the abuse they endure, they actually become inseparable very quickly cause like. they don't have anyone else. and also they just genuinely care about each other. additionally at this point nova has evolved into an espeon and has telepathic powers, so him and vee can communicate linguistically with each other, so you know that helps

generally my current focus of this story is in the early years, when vee is 12 and younger, before they start realizing that shit is fucked up and they need to escape (up until that hypothetical point they have been successfully groomed into believing everything happening to them was not abuse/was normal). i have left out a metric fuckton of detail here just to get across the basic premise. i am constantly exploring vee's psyche, nova's psyche, it's like an in depth exploration of the mind of an abused child in horrific circumstances and god it's cathartic. i love these two so fucking much

btw i guess this art has more context now huh haha after i infodumped off the plot to my sister they looked at this art again and was like. OHHH THIS IS EVEN MORE OMINOUS AND HARD TO LOOK AT WITH CONTEXT. AND I WAS LIKE YEAH!!!! YOU SEE THE VISION!!! THE SYMBOLISM!! ETC!!!!

uh yeah if you read this far thank you and i just wanna say i've been building up the courage to talk about these two for GENUINELY two years, it has been over 2 full years since that initial drawing, and i am nervous and jittery posting this but i do not want to die without having shared my work with the world and i'm willing to take the risks to get my voice out there. so you reading it is very much appreciated ur like my first step into being more confident as a survivor lol

oh and fwiw despite these guys being so correlated with my trauma it's not offensive to make headcanons or ask me questions about them or compliment darker art of them however you want, in fact i love that shit!! please i've been holding these guys back for two years i have so much to say that hasn't been said. as much as i am nervous i am EXCITED

[littleshopofhorrors-confessions]

Okay so I really really need someone (anyone really) t know this n I'm feeling brave so. I'm confessin this. Is this weird? I'm so sorry if it is.

Scriv3lloirl is such a talented artist n he makes such funny posts—I'm really scared to talk wit him, or reveal myself, cus I actually dont know how old he is (an I'm a minor and I'm like 50/50 if I have a damn crush on this man.. I'll be fr 😭😭)

None of my friends really like Little Shop as much as I do, n I'm devastated and I really wanna be the Seymour to his Orin (cus he got me into shippin those guys.)

The way he draws Orin is so fckn cool n I love the way he draws Orin's leather jacket n his hooked nose n his super deep set eyes n fat Orin supremacy!!!!!! (I low-key wanna hold his hand (his Orin design) cos I think he would crush me.)

Scriv3lloirl has introduced me t so many ideas n headcanons n I kinda picked up his typin quirk and uggjwhahdmanrhe-

If he sees this, umm............ Hi!!!! I'm your #1 fan. 🦷 (I'm so scared to send this in.)

I cant tell you if it's weird or not but I can at least be weird with you. I feel there is a non-zero chance that every alloromantic LSOH fan on tumblr has a crush on that guy. I don't think it's ever made or said anything that wasn't the coolest thing i'd ever seen. It's art is impeccable. It's character interpretations are absolutely inspired. His OC designs are awesome. When I read his typing quirk I can practically hear the sound of a revving motorcycle. His pfp appears to be the photo for "Dentist!" on the back of the 1982 official off broadway cast album vinyl record. I'm also currently working on retrieving a piece of LSOH fanart that I never posted because tooth encouraged me to. one of tooth's pronouns are "tooth." everything about that is Objectively. Fucking. Awesome.

Everyone go check out @scriv3lloirl 's blog rn. It's a goddamn treat

[icey--stars]

Omg TELL ME MORE ABOUT BOTH 13 IDEAS RN … please 🥺

first off, i love you. thank you for the excitement XD

okay, the full overview of the idea is to be a sister to aelin or eris. onto the individual things... hehe. just did it in bullet points for my own sanity. (i went overboard, but YOU ASKED! i was having fun XD)

also please nobody steal these ideas without asking 😭 because i really like how unique i made it and i DO want to post it eventually

Aelin's Sister:

first off, she's the older sibling

i actually fully wrote out a timeline for this particular one because i felt like i had to get the ages right and stuff sooo lemme just give you this first off and then go over the points

basically, i named the OC "Aeress" because yes. had to keep the "AE" vibe going.

Aeress is 9 when Aedion is born and 14 when Aelin is born

At the age of 21, however, Aeress basically went missing. She was with her family (mom and dad) in the Whitefang mountains when a tribe attacked.

She was determined to be dead after being missing for an entire month

HOWEVER, the real story is that she was captured.

Here's the actual written version:

“When I was in the White Fang Mountains, just a simple vacation if you remember, sidekick, a wild tribe attacked us. Humans, all of them, but some had ice magic. We defended ourselves and the guards got Mother and Father to safety. However, they didn’t notice me getting grabbed and thrown on the back of a horse, bleeding from my calf that’d been cut.

“They took me, traveling far. I healed myself when I could, but they put me in iron after the leader realized that I was with them. There was no returning me without full blown war, so instead they faked my death. They took me as a war prize and a slave.”

---

“For a year, they kept me in the Ferian Gap, hidden in the tunnels there. They didn’t even notice when I Settled. I was to mine ice for them, and to appease them. It was impossible for me, an untrained idiotic princess, to escape, so I stayed and waited. My chance came soon after when magic fell. I’d been unchained with only iron cuffs on at that moment. I ran in the chaos of the mountains shuddering, to where the witches trained. A mountain in the Omega.”

---

“After that, with magic gone, I was not skilled enough, I felt, to leave the Ferian Gap, and brave Adarlan with the news I spied on from the tribe. I survived off of them for a good six years, unwilling to brave the valleys and predators without my magic and without any skills of survival. I was untrained and very killable at that moment. I did my best with a sword I stole, but… an untrained arm can only do so much. The mining helped slightly, but not enough.

“Anyway, six years later, humans appeared at my little mountain hideout. These were the humans who created and tested out the current wyverns of the witches’. However, I was still a goddamn idiot, so I got captured. I was a prize for the wyverns and they didn’t even know who I was. But they kept me alive, so I lived like that for a little. 3 years or so, which wasn’t that bad. 

“The wyverns were useless for a while, but the humans seemed to not think of me like a slave after a little bit. I was a partner, who helped a little to improve them. Though, I never dared with their dark magic. 

“When the witches came, I escaped. And got captured again, by a Blueblood coven. I was pissed, but I was given as a prize to Petrah, the Blueblood Heir. Quite a nice female, actually. She wasn’t as bloodthirsty as the rest. She knew who I was based on scent, I think, but she never told anyone. 

“I stayed in her room and one day, she decided to teach me to fight. I learned later it was because of a foolish hope beginning in her heart. Of freedom. Then she taught me to ride wyverns, showing me in secret the beauty of a wyvern. One day, during the day of the games where the covens fought for Wing Leader, I tamed my own wyvern. His name is Ryder. Pitch black, small-sized male who was fast. Perfect for what I needed. 

“When the Yellowlegs witches went to Morath, I followed. I blended in quite well, actually. I could pretend to be a servant to the witches and a witch to the humans who knew none the better. When they flew for Adarlan, I escaped. I flew for Terrasen.

“From there, I supported the war as a healer,” I finished. “Took some time to build enough courage to see you, but I wanted to make sure I didn’t compromise your position on the throne, little flame. You deserved to rule. More than I ever did. I know a little about your history as an assassin, and I know you knew how to fight. How to lead, when I heard of your court. And I knew Terrasen was in good hands. I can offer you advice for the finer tuned things of ruling, but leadership was never my forte.” ("you" refers to Aelin)

So basically, that's that. that's how I inputted an older sister into the mix

HOWEVER! Aeress is the exact reflection of Aelin in power. She has majority water (like SUPER powerful) and a tiny bit of flame. Barely a candle light.

This is also where I inputted a very cool concept: the reflection of the powers means that if either of them died, they would've known because the little tiny bit of the power (aelin's water, aeress's fire) would go to the other sister. my previous-self explained it better so here:

“I knew, Aelin. I knew you were alive. I knew because of the goddamn magic in our veins. The small bits of our magic that we can barely use… the water piece you have… if it had come to me, I would’ve known.”

“But magic-”

“That feeling transcends magic being gone,” I cut her off. “It is a deep feeling, of something being lost and gained at the same time. It is rare for any fae to feel, but sometimes, when the magic is reflected, it happens.”

however, some cute things I think you'll appreciate are the NICKNAMES!!

Aeress calls Aelin "little flame" BECAUSE AWWW

And she calls Aedion "sidekick" while he calls her "Queen Bee"

And also like Aeress and Rowan actually get along so well

Aeress is kinda like Aedion in that way and saw Rowan as this powerful ancient fae warrior and is very surprised to find him to be quite chill. she's nervous at first and basically is like "Rowan, if you don't want your mate doing this then just tell me... I'll get away right now-"

but Rowan, at the end of what I actually have written (it is not being finished considering it has no plot XD), basically ends up making them siblings. brother-sister bonds!!

Also Ryder is the cutest wyvern of all time- the one that Aeress gets. pitch black, small, but fast and agile as hell. but he's quite literally a teddy bear. he likes cuddling. he's a ferocious beast who cuddles.

anyway let's stop talking about aelin's sister and get onto ERIS'S TWIN!

Eris's Twin Sister:

I wrote the most for this part, but I have the least amount of worldbuilding for it.

basically, it's a secret twin thing.

please note that "Merle" is the Lady of Autumn!!

“When I was young, I was married off to Beron Vanserra. I was soon pregnant with my first child. But what the healers told me only days before the birth was that there… I had twins. Fraternal twins. They didn’t tell me out of fear before then, but I knew right then and there, that I had to save them. Get them out of the Forest House. Both of them, if I could manage.

“Beron wanted the genders, so I told him one. It was a male. When I gave birth, I kept Beron out for a few days while I recovered. Long enough that he was antsy. I… I gave him the male because he’d wanted a son and winnowed the female to an old friend’s barn and left it, content with wards of warmth and a pacifier.”

Basically, that "old friend" is named Martha and raised Seraphine (OC for THIS one XD. nickname = Sera).

BUT... then Eris kills Beron. And the magic doesn't go to him and he goes on a hunt to find it.

Seraphine, however, has found herself bowled over and now with double the amount of power she had previously.

Now, mind you, she's quite ADHD, so she's not super confident, but she's stubborn as fuck.

Eris promises to help her as much as he can because he's ACTUALLY a good bro and doesn't want to make the same mistake with Sera as he did with his brothers.

Eris helps her get settled in, and Sera manages the court basically by signing random shit and having him help her because surprisingly, their goals align. like making the poor less poor

Sera has a lot of the skills required to be a High Lady, like writing, so luckily, she's quite good at what she's doing.

Eventually, because Sera is very forgetful and disorganized, they get an assistant, an older nanny figure who basically helps manage Sera's day so she doesn't get overwhelmed.

BUT! hehehe... Eris and Sera want an alliance with the Night Court.

The NC doesn't want her to die before their meeting, so they send Az to basically secretly protect her.

however... Azris is canon in this universe. Seraphine gets jump scared by Az because Eris basically wants to make sure that she knows the plan. and that plan is to reveal their mate bond at the meal >:)

Honestly, the NC is pretty chill about Seraphine. Sure, she's nervous, but everyone's pretty chill.

Rhys tries to read her mind one time cus he's suspicious, but they move past it. (Sera can shield her mind well) honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if Rhys would be scared in that moment.

Azris revealed... WOOOPEEE.

Anyway, that's basically that besides me quite literally just going off on an Azris spree and writing a wedding/mating bond scene 🤦

I went overboard, but honestly, these might be full-on wips probably never to be posted, but they're so much fun to tell you about.

thank you for the ask my beautiful anon. i love you.

[pinketine]

It's like. Rap has a lot of homophobia. And rap is a genre that's mostly black people, mostly influenced by black culture, and there's a lot of history and nuance and delicacy about homophobia in black communities that's hard to unravel. But the bottom line is that rap (and r&b by extension), has a lot of homophobia in it. And it's hard to be black and queer. You end up feeling shunned either way.

One of the first notable cases of rappers calling it out was Kanye West in 2005. And it meant a lot to a lot of queer kids who loved hip hop, especially black ones.

And Frank Ocean coming out, even if I wasn't there for it at the time, meant even more. The guy who made a classic album like Channel Orange was bisexual. He was black and his first love was a man and when you go back and listen to Bad Religion it all just clicks together a little bit more. He says his coming out word doc was hard to write in 2011 but only posted it in 2012 months later. Because it's so hard.

And it wasn't just Frank Ocean either. After years of edgy lyrics and shock factor and some slight undertones at something else, Tyler the Creator released Flower Boy and it was so. Vulnerable. His albums had always had some level of vulnerability to them but this was different. On Where This Flower Blooms... he says "tell these black kids they can be who they are" and I wish I was joking about the level of emotion I felt when hearing it for the first time. As a black kid, you often feel so constricted by the expectation that you should act black, God forbid you get called an oreo or a coconut. And after that, he kept being openly bi on his following albums and he's so casual about it that it just feels. Good. To see. That it's normal.

Lil Nas X is so bold. He was so brave and so bold and I smiled to myself every time my parents complained. And I admired it so much. It was very very cathartic. I wish he wasn't attacked so much by his own communities, and while his clapbacks are fun and tongue in cheek, it makes me sad they even had to be made. But it still feels so good seeing him do his thing, happily.

And it just keeps on happening, Steve Lacy, Kevin Abstract, Syd, even more that I cannot think of rn and I'm so happy that it's like that now. More rappers and r&b singers come out, some in casual ways, others in not, but they all keep coming back to how hard it is to be black and queer, like they're two identities that are inherently compatible when they really shouldn't be. But it's getting better, even if it's slow. And it feels so good to feel represented by the music I listen to as a black kid. Argh. Rap is built on rebellion and the queerness fits into it just right, I think.

[generalkenobitrash]

watching hotd s2 ep3 rn.

the intro of the episode was very good. i myself enjoy some blackwoods being cool, i think the show set up benjicot blackwood (edit: turns out it was davos blackwood and they cut the battle of the burning mill) very well. the switch to the aftermath of the battle of the burning mill really showed how men are eager to engage in war and bloodshed. not to mention, it was overall greatly shot. even if some of the writing this season is a little wacky, they keep serving us with amazing cinematography. i have to admit, the scenes between rhaenyra and mysaria are very intriguing. i like the dynamic between them. the conversation between rhaena and rhaenyra was also interesting. i sympathize with poor rhaena. she probably feels so useless without a dragon. her expression when she was about to depart was heartbreaking. imagine feeling like an ordinary babysitter in a family of dragonriders. she understands her duty, but she still feels almost humiliated by being sent away. criston finally got a haircut as ugly as he is inside. ser gwayne slays, as expected of freddie fox. i'm really hoping that alicent will become disillusioned with criston because of his utter idiocy. i do understand what the showrunners wanted to portray with her sexual relationship with him, but we really got too many scenes of them together for my liking. short note on ep1: it would've been more impactful if we (the audience) became aware of their affair at the very end of the episode, when helaena comes into alicent's room with jaehaera. the shots of harrenhal very pretty much exactly what they were supposed to be. i am liking the portrayal of rhaenys and corlys' relationship. they're very alike, as they were in the books, and yet they are still unique and seperate people. mother rhaenyra breaks my heart, especially knowing what will happen to them. jace hugging joffrey was cute. phia saban always blows me away and breaks my heart. that scene between her and alicent...helaena forgave alicent for trying to talk about what she saw between her and criston, when jaehaerys had just been murdered. judging from this scene and the scene on the stairs in s2 makes me believe that helaena understands why her mother seeks affection from the wrong person. helaena herself is in a loveless marriage where her needs do not matter. i do wish the showrunners somehow brought aegon and helaena together in their shared grief. ulf the white is interesting. when i saw the tavern girl, i was like, why is she familiar? then my mind went OH NO IT'S DYANA. i will, however, remain silent about the brothel scene. i really don't have anything to say, aside from noting the courage of ewan mitchell. i love that gwayne does his own thing, not letting criston talk him down. baela proves why she is called 'the brave.' i'm sorry i'm distracted by how pretty they made ser gwayne. i imagine he'll be a delight to watch on the screen in the coming episodes. rhaenyra's council continues to eat her every nerve aside from rhaenys. daemon in his room in harrenhal is giving when you get scammed by your airbnb with all the drippy ceilings. young rhaenyra in harrenhal just perfectly encapsulates daemon's guilt. it was also a very haunting scene. i missed milly alcock. the alys introduction was just perfect. gayle rankin looks perfect as her, though there's something about her voice that will take some getting used to (i'm neurodivergent and i have a thing with voices, don't mind it). i have to say, this episode has been, for now, the best of the season. geeta vasant patel is an amazing director and i expected nothing short of amazing of her.

i am terribly, terribly sorry for the lengthy train of thought. i truly wrote as i watched the episode. truly thought invoking.

edit 2: i was legit thinking "hm i'm kinda bummed out no one's interacting w my post" then i remembered that it's been sitting in my drafts since yesterday. o yeah, this episode has its faults, but atleast it didn't make me thoroughly confused with the writers and showrunners

[nono-bunny]

Heya! Just wondering, since Netflix Geeked Week will probably show a trailer for the live-action Avatar on Thursday, I want to ask a few things:

Are you excited for it?

What do you think they'll keep, cut, and expand in this live-action of ATLA - Book One: Water (Season 1)?

Since Bryke are not on the project now, do you have a good feeling that this live-action could be a lot better than what they come up with at Avatar Studios?

(By the way, were these "Braving the Elements" episodes recent from your last posts? And were Bryke really acting like complete stooges in them? :O )

Hi, thank you for the lovely ask!

I've been completely ignoring the huge Geeked Week banner so I have no idea what's up with that or that it's possible we're getting a trailer soon, so that's cool information to have lol

1. I honestly can't say I'm excited for the live action. The last Netflix live action for a beloved childhood franchise of mine was such a dumpster fire because they focused on being edgy and dark and abandoned the source material for the worse, so like? Past experience has made me extremely cautious in regards to live action adaptions coming from them. In general I am not a fan of this trend- the Disney ones are shit, and I only really find myself watching and enjoying the (sometimes shitty, but like, in a fun way) J-drama adaptions of old shoujo manga as I don't really fuck with any other genre nowadays. Anime has a long history with shitty adaptions for action shows, and as action is inherent to ATLA after all, even if it's not technically an anime, I know that's gonna be a hurdle they'll have to clear- just having good effects and fight scenes. It's not MY personal focus as I do find charm in shitty effects (I do like J-dramas after all!) but honestly that is probably what's gonna make or break the initial hype for the show imo. Rn I'm honestly just... So neutral about it to the point where it surprises me (I'm. Very much not a neutral person usually lol) and I think it's just a matter of like.... Being burned AND pleasantly surprised by ATLA stuff before so I'm kinda hedging my bets until I know which way it's gonna go for me. Honestly I can very realistically see me LOVING it, but the other option is that it's bad and that's kinda what I'm preparing for rn ig? I can't imagine I'll be too upset if it's just... Bad or unsatisfactory given that I already spend way too much energy on the shit the OG did wrong lol, if the LA follows suit with those I think I'll just kinda... Ignore it lol. Idk, A LOT of mixed feelings

2. I... Really can't even begin to imagine what they choose to do with the reduced time frame, but I know I for sure have my own thoughts on what I WISH they would! Mainly I want NO Kataang, if there's Kataang I'm not gonna even bother with it tbh unless it's completely one sided (which it was in the original, yet we still know how THAT turned out)... I obviously want endgame Zutara, but I'm not hard pressed on it tbh- it would be funny as fuck for it to happen after Bryke left over creative differences though! I REALLY want the Blue Spirit to stay, I really DON'T want The Great Divide (no way it's staying in though so we're probably safe on that front), and overall I kinda just? Want Aang to be more sympathetic- him being irresponsible in the original show only makes sense until a certain point, and I want an Aang that shows an ability to grow from early on. Aang's an awful, awful Avatar, and I truly want him NOT to be one here- honestly, a good way to get around some of his early issues would be to borrow a bit from Korra and twist his love for slacking off into an enthusiasm for all four cultures (rather than just their rideable animals), which I feel like he was CLOSE to having... But as usual with him it was all tell and no show- I wanna see him having friends in all four nations, I wanna see him being multi cultural even before he gets freezed, I wanna see him embrace all four bendings and cultures rather than fixating on air, I wanna see him fail and take responsibility... But I also still want to see him being a kid, because that's crucial, and while the original show never allowed him to grow up, I also don't want him to be immediately seen as and treated as wise and powerful- I want him to struggle with what it means being an Avatar who knows about it at such a young age, I want to see him meaningfully interact with his past incarnations, I want him to ACTUALLY find a balance! I think I maybe just... Want a whole new main character still named Aang tbh, because I DON'T like who he is in the original show, but I do like who he could've been! I REALLY don't want the show to be intentionally edgy- if it goes into any dark topics, they should be ones already raised in the original. I want some more light shed on how the North Pole and Pakku's sexism never went away, I want the show to acknowledge that the monks didn't go down without putting up a hell of a fight, I want to know what the fuck Zhao was doing to get promoted like that despite his constant failures on screen, I want to really dive deep into Aang and Bumi's relationship and maybe how Aang failed him on a personal level (he's literally the only one who would've missed Aang, not the Avatar for all this time) and how he mourned him for years, I want Aang to contend with and realize that he's in a war and how he's FOR SURE killed people and will have to again even before Koizilla (he kills so many people in The Northern Air Temple!!)... I could honestly kinda do with an abridged version of some of the Gaang's travels, like, a lot of them are neat but only matter tangentially or from a world/character building perspective and can be dropped/merged/replaced pretty safely tbh. For example, Haru doesn't really need to exist tbh, what Imprisoned does for Katara can and maybe even SHOULD change gears to focus more on her rather than this random guy who only ever shows up once more to get laughed at because he has a lame mustache. The Fortuneteller should be dropped or altered severely because its message doesn't hold up under scrutiny. Yue should be a bigger presence and be more of an established character. Jet should maybe get his role expanded. Suki should be more of a presence throughout. There are a lot of ways to make the first season better tbh, and also it NEEDS to change to fit with the new timeframe so? Yeah I hope they do a good job at separating the wheat from the chaff because god knows the original show did not know how to do that.

3. I'm honestly pretty confident in saying that Avatar Studios will never ever make anything good, or at the very least, anything that I'll like, but as to what the lack of Bryke means for the LA? Honestly, it's all up to the people working on it- Bryke being bullheaded and bad writers isn't exclusive to them, and if the staff is made up of writers that lean too heavily on the source material or drift too far from it that could honestly sink the whole show. Of course I'm happy they're not on board given their awful track record, but like... I know nothing about any of the people working on it in their stead, so a lack of Bryke doesn't necessarily equate to good writing (it certainly does leave out THEIR bad writing though!!)

Braving the Elements is soon gonna start reviewing the third season of ATLA, and it started in 2021 so everything there is very recent! And yeah, every time Bryke are on they prove themselves to be assholes all over again, they keep topping themselves somehow istg!

I feel that this isn't my most eloquent post but tbh I'm quite sick rn so this is the best I can do atm, hopefully I managed to answer properly anyway?