#me reacting normally to my husbands affair having a new boyfriend

[byulyi]

"Thanks, I'm great and super jealous."

[kasagia]

♤ Klaus Mikaelson's Masterlist ♤

~One-shots~

Making her love me

Klaus has a crush on Y/N. She avoided him at all costs. A one-night stand irrevocably changes their lives and forces Y/N to rethink her relationship with the original hybrid.

Be my Valentine

The day of lovers came like a bolt from the blue. You were planning to stay in your house, make yourself a huge pizza, and celebrate another year of being a single, self-sufficient woman. But you forgot that having the original hybrid as a lover-enemy (more like a puppy/wolf madly in love with you) comes with all sorts of surprises.

My (and your) tears ricochet

You and Klaus have a difficult relationship. For 500 years, you bond, break up, and get back together, being both your worst nightmares and your longed-for dreams. But after Lucien bites you and you die in Klaus' arms, the true feelings of your lover come out. And you're as delighted as devastated.

Together (doesn't feel right at all)

After you dump your boyfriend, Stefan Salvatore, for the big bad wolf, Klaus Mikaelson, and move to New Orleans with him, you start to realize his toxic, possessive behavior towards you. But is there still enough time to leave the devil who seduced you and go back to your normal life?

What makes her so special?

You have a gift of attracting any man to you. Everyone who meets you loves you. But the cup of bitterness is overflowing when, in front of Cami's eyes, Klaus begins to fall in love with you. And you do not remain indifferent to the courtship of your sister's handsome friend for long. The question is, can the two of you confess your true feelings to each other before jealous Cami messes things up between you and Klaus?

I'm not the only one

You and Klaus have been together for ages. You swore to each other Always and Forever. You could always rely on him, and the original hybrid trusted you with his plans. But how long can you turn a blind eye to his sudden interest in a certain Caroline Forbes? And after hearing him say the same words to her that practically started your relationship, you realize that maybe after all, you're not the only one for him.

Loved by them two

After your parents (pack leaders) arranged your marriage to Klaus (with whom you accidentally had a one-night stand earlier), you tied your fate irrevocably to the Mikaelsons. Problem? 1. You hate your husband for tricking you into this marriage. 2. His noble brother is too alluring. 3. You find out the hard way that hate, love, and lust are a very explosive mixture. Especially when you add the two Mikaelsons to it.

I wanna be yours

Over the ages, Klaus finally matures to admit that he has fallen in love with you, Katherine Pierce's sister. However, can you two be more than occasional "once in a century" one-night stands? Can he be yours, and you only his?

Cheater on the bridge

You've been sneaking around with Klaus for several months now, cheating on your boyfriend, Stefan. You feel terrible about it, but you're afraid to break up with Stefan because you don't know how he'll react to it. However, Elena finds out about your little affair. And everything goes to hell.

Everybody wants to steal my girl

Klaus (and you) have been struggling with hybrid's jealousy for 1,000 years. It doesn't help that you're stunningly beautiful and that all his enemies want to steal you from him. But Klaus will not let his wife ever leave his side—or worse, lose her feelings for him. Even if he is "slightly" insecure about himself.

~Mini-series~

Our little game

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

You and Klaus have been playing this game between yourselves since your first meeting. One day, you two would fight with each other like dogs, and the next day, you would flirt and act like people completely mad with love. But whatever was between you two, you would never lose this game and admit that you fell for him. He would only use you for your power, right? At least that's what you were telling yourself all this time.

[mamanars02]

I AM PROFESSIONALLY CONNED BY MY HUSBAND A SELF PROCLAIMED GOOD GUY Oo day, ang Ganda ko pero naloko ng pangit. Pano ba nangyare? Ganito bhie, Mahaba ang kwento pero di kasinghaba ng titi ng asawa ko. Year 2011, I met my husband in KSA. I am still young back then, and still madly inlove with my year LDR boyfriend. My husband courted me, even though he is aware I was in a relationship, he tried. He befriended me and since he proclaimed himself as a very good guy with some flaws in life, being a father of a teenage girl, so, I thought back then, OMG he was such an honest GUY. OO, naniwala ako, uto uto ang peg. Then, my 7 year relationship ended. Chance nya na.. Grab the opportunity ginawa ng Lolo nyo. Brokenhearted, I gave my husband a chance. Brokenhearted, I made a choice to give in to him, sexually, in KSA (di ako malibog, nagtry Lang ang gaga, bilis nga, di ako nasiyahan.) He proposed to me then on, not in a very romantic way as I would like to imagine. He just handed me the ring and just said the word, Marry Me. (Walang ka sweet sweet, kahit I sang langgam di malasahan and proposal kasi Walang tamis) But I am so young back then,fresh pa ako bhie, and he is 11 years older than me, gurang na sya in short. Kinilig pa rin ako (or pinaniwala ko sarili ko siguro that time) , even though my heart sank hoping he would have proposed formally. We planned our wedding, but he is not that participative. Parang, o sya, planuhin MO lahat aatend Lang ako. It is like I am marrying myself alone, but when it comes to meeting me, to have sex with me, I can feel the excitement he is showing me (wagas ang libog ng Lolo nyo) . His family never did the traditional pamamanhikan nor meeting my parents to pay respect for taking my hand in marriage. How ignorant of me in those times. I guess I am really blinded by the old guy. He just called my parents through phone and say, “Hello Nay, Tay, I would like to marry your daughter.” and conversation ended. I felt the pain and hesitancy of my parents back then. Their anxiety and fear for me, their one and only princess, being taken by this middle age guy, a total stranger who never came to meet them. I am a fucking asshole. My family ignored those facts and questions in their mind. They love me, and they saw the excitement and happiness that I am getting married. (I am so lucky with my parents) As months has passed, I started doubting myself to get married to him, I noticed some flaws. I started to feel being used as a trophy girlfriend, a sexual object. Parausan Lang feel gurl??? I was ready to end our relationship, and the unfortunate event happened. Our affair has been reported by our fellow Filipino colleagues. I was so scared and helpless, afraid of getting jailed and deported. I am not ready to become a young jobless woman. My siblings need me, financially to support their studies. I can’t afford seeing my siblings’ future taken away because of my stupidity. Gaga kasi, gurl. Yan ang napala ng pag explore. So, I got married in an instant, in the Philippine Embassy of Riyadh. The place where Filipino couples getting married in a conservative, strict country like KSA. I got married in a rush, without the presence of my family. Me… Alone… And that’s how my husband had the chance to con me. Pano ba? Sexually,.. Hmmmm… He drained all the youth in me, wow.. Maka drain Lang eh no? Having me in bed almost every day and night, Kung pwede nya ako chukchakin ng 5 beses, ay gagawin nya.. Nakuha nya kasi ambata eh. I am not sexually accomplished, but I pretended to be. He is harsh at times, he wanted to see how I react. His foreplays are rough. And I want it to end, so I did my role of being sexually in to it. I dreamed to be a good wife. A wife that will fulfill my husband’s needs, physically, sexually, emotionally, even financially. I wanted to become a mother as well, so we got pregnant in one try. I thought he will become a caring husband, an excited father to be thought it is not his first time. But, in the first check up I had, he

chose to spend his time with his so called friends rather than assisting me and be with me in my first ultrasound. I was hurt. I never expected that. Mabait sya, my mind says. Months has passed, my pregnancy is very much stable. Still working tough even on my 38th week. Malakas to, bhie.. In those months together, he was insisting on taking bank loans. I am hesistant. I am not the type of person who likes to have UTANG because I want my salary complete. However, he had me say Yes. I took a loan and it was approved because my salary is high enough to meet their required scale. Just like that, when I received the loan, he took charge of it. Sent the money to his parents, telling me they will starts to build a house for us in their place. Since I believed their words, I just went on with the flow, not knowing his father is taking a Chunk of money as well to gamble. I was able to deliver my first child normally. I was such a happy proud mother. He is as well but since having a child in KSA is difficult without having someone to take care of my son. We have to sacrifice and send our son home to the Philippines. It was my first, greatest heartache and it will always be until now. I tried to be strong for my child’s future and my husband is giving 500 riyals share for my son monthly out of the 4000 riyals he is receiving from his salary, while I share 2000 riyals, Mas Madatung ako eh.. I did not bother to ask for more not unless it is my son’s birthday or it is Christmas time. Di ako demanding, Promise. Because I tried to understand his situation that he has another child to feed and my salary is higher. The loan I took, I am paying 2/3 of it monthly, while he shares 1/3 of it. Trying hard ako maging perpekto ng asawa. Every vacation we will divide our weeks from my place to his place. Nevertheless, another ill fated event occurred. We had a fight in his place. And his father suddenly involved himself in our argument and threw us out from their place, in the house I spent my money with which his father gambled as well. Lakas ng loob Kaya sigawan kami, PUTANG INa LUMAYAS KAYO DITO! Ako naman, e di layas. Masunuring Bata. He let his father throw us out in the middle of the night. Yet, I am strong (though sa utak ko, tang Ina pigilan MO naman ako asawa ko, and my situation be like, ASA KA GURL). So, I took my siblings with me and went to our relatives house. I could not fathom the fact that he let me wander in the middle of the night with my siblings. Parang, bahala ka kahit mamatay ka situation. Ganon. Nonetheless, ignorant me. We patched things up, I could not let my child grow up with a broken family. And the same goes by. My life revolved with same routine. Giving money, covering my child’s expenses and I let it all happen. My mistake,maganda pero gaga naman.. I believed in him. Really. Sabi nya kasi mabait sya. With the pangako also to fix the ownership of our house. (Asa PA more, ne.) And there it goes. Years passed, I got employed by a better employer in Saudi, higher salary. And again, he convinced me with another loan. And I gave in, tanga Lang pero maganda. Yan nalang pakonswelo sa sarili, pagbigyan na. So, I gave half of my loan to my husband. Then, I don’t know how cursed I am or him? His contract ended. Though there is a new employer willing to take him in. He refused. He said, he wanted to be with our son.. Ayyyy… natouch ako dun, gurl. So, I let him go back to Philippines, with investment plans, business plans and all even having a baby. Dami naming drawing, ay. Hanggang drawing Lang pala. Even, going home and taking care of our son, drawing din ay. Umasa ang Bata sa wala.. I did not oblige him to give monetary assistance to our son since July 2020 for the fact that, I wanted him to save the money he received from his severance pay in order to add up to our planned investments (planned talaga Yun, planado.. Planado nyang isugal at waldasin. ) Moreover, with cash assistance from me until he left to Philippines. Sugar mommy Lang.. Kagwapo ba? Hindi,

pangit po talaga asawa ko. Nabudol Lang talaga ako. When he arrived in taguig, first 2 months he is okay. That even when, he even asked for 100k, nag pauto uli ang gaga, PAK! MONEY TRANSFER, automatic ako bhie.. He said everything is going according to plan. (according to plan pala Para magwaldas) until, the mid of December 2020, he started having mood shifts, parang lalaking nireregla, inaaway ako tapos aamu-in kasi gusto ng cybersex. I tried to be more understanding, ang bait ko Kaya, because maybe because of LDR situation and the stress of pandemic. In spite of the mood swings, the indirect accusations and his possessive behaviors shows. From 2011 to 2020, of course, medyo kilala mo naman asawa mo e no.. From the eve of my birthday December 23, to the day of my birthday December 24, Pati pasko hang gang New Year. He was so fucking possessive that all I could do was to have a video call on him almost 24hours a day. If he wants cybersex, I have to give in, I have to show my body and play with it. Pokpok na pakiramdam ko.. Medyo first class naman siguro. Because if not, he will accuse me of having an affair. Speaking, he even says I have a man beside me and he hears the voices of the man. And me like, WHAAAAT??? My momo ba sa kwarto ko? And take note, he records our video calls. Then early January 2021, I was surprised by a post of a stranger to my FB account on my son’s picture, accusing my husband, a theft, a con man, stating ‘that your husband namely BLAH BLAH Blah owes me a 100k and promised to pay me back but he did not, you’re a family of thieves and so on. ‘ Nawindang ako, bhie. Agad Agad, delete post, teng ene.. Sa picture pa ng gwapo Kong anak. I confronted my husband, sya pa galit bhie and gradually, he admitted that he owes money to some people, and he cashed out all the money to his friends, and alcohols and gambling. BABAE? Meron ba?? Malay ko.. So, Nothing left. That’s when I thought, Kaya pala Kung ano ano akusasyon kasi sya mismo may kalokohang ginagawa. DEFENSE MECHANISM USED – PROJECTION Again, supportive wife here (tanga Lang, day, wishing ba) I said, it’s okay, it’s only money and so on. And I gave almost 40k just to have an end and have him start again to apply for jobs. I gave him links and ads and places to apply back abroad. Pero, ASA PA MORE. Waley.. Despite of what happened, the endless fight, accusations pa more, and demanding for money did not end. The messages of people I don’t know kept coming-in in my messenger. And my vacation day is here! I was very excited to be with him and make a baby. But fuck him, kahit sa eroplano iharap ko daw cp ko sa bawat taong katabi ko, gago sya. Para akong tangang inikot ang cp. And he was not satisfied at all, tagalan ko daw iharap ang cam.. E di wow, wag na.. Awayin nalang nya ako kesa ireklamo ako ng passengers. And hello Philippines during pandemic, quarantined in a high standard hotel. And of course, my great husband wants to barge-in in my hotel, because sabi nya I have a a lalake in my room.. May nakikita daw at naririnig, and me be like, Saan banda sa kwarto yang nakikita MO? Like, I really wants to see and hear it as well. Kaya, e di wow uli.. Ang lakas ko naman sa OWWA at coast guard Para bumali ng quarantine protocol.. I really tried.. I tried… and I tried… and I tried to fix our marriage… message after message of people I never knew and people I knew hoping I would be the one to pay the debts of my VERY GOOD HUSBAND, still surprises me. To the point that, Even looking at my messenger or FB gave me a phobia. I am so helpless.. Like, sheeeet… anong nangyare gurl? Saan ako kakapit. And my husband even wants to take charge of my son’s bank.. But no way..! LIKE TAMA NA, ULOL.! LALABAN ANG INA! BUT I REALLY Tried… nag effort ako… nagpakatanga ako.. Who wants a broken family for their child, right? Wala di ba? I tried to hide the flaws of our marriage from our son. I cried secretly, I hid the phone away when his father starts to shout at me. But you see, my son is smarter than me. He saw my tears, my

sadness. He caught his father shouting at me at times via videocall. Huli sa akto ni bulilit. Pero di ko Alam. My vacation ended with a failure to have a complete family bonding but accomplished mother and son bonding. I tried to fulfill my son’s needs with my existence alone. And hello me ngayon… nganga… Still lost… basag na basag… I tried to fix myself up… I have to, for my son’s future, I may not be accomplished with my marriage life, but thankfully God blessed my career as a Frontliner. My son’s has no one now but me. My husband still asks for money. I changed my FB name to Korean characters. I unfriended my husband to avoid those people he owes some money and people sending me, KAWAWA AKO KASI NILOKO AKO. Tama na uy. Masakit. Sobrang sakit.. Tao po ako… animal ang ugali pero Hindi bato.. But I am hiding all my tears and wounds from the people surrounding me even though they knew, ginago ako ng asawa ko. They did not bother to ask, they respect my silence and I thanked them for that. But in reality, I don’t know what to do. I felt stuck in a quicksand, slowly drowning in sorrows, sadness and frustrations. I was left behind, drowning. Tortured with this unexplained pain and agony. I am conned by my husband. I spent money on a house which will never be mine. I spent money which will never come back to me.. I was left, zero…. And I don’t know what to do… How can I help myself… When I don’t even know if our law can protect me and my child.. It is me and my child… Against a MAN who is supposed to be our protection but rather, the Man who thinks nothing but himself, he himself is a danger to me and my son. His delusions and hallucinations still continues. Baka may third eye asawa ko???? I don’t know. His unending hurtful messages kept pouring in. Even a recorded sound of the bed na yumuyogyog, he will send it to me. His unending demands of money. Like wow, bat di sya magtrabaho…. Sugar mommy ako??? Ako??? Gandang sugar mommy mo naman, bhie… I just wished…. I just hoped… The government will someday established a law for the wives who has been conned financially by their own husbands. May VAWC, PAO, PCW, et cetera but how come it is near yet so far…. I just don’t know the proper law to fight against him… I can’t annul him, it’s too expensive.. Hanggang sa patayin nya nalang siguro ako.. Legal separation? OMG, how about the house.. In short, sya nag enjoy sa bahay na dugo at pawis Kong pinundar. Our son? How can I demand monetary assistance when he is jobless… I asked legally, and nothing happened.. It only benefits him, not me and my son… Kaya wow.. Hanggang sa mamatay o mapatay nya ako ay.. Our Family Court aspires to fix marriages as much as possible, and it is good.. But does it means, wag maghiwalay, magpaabuso ka Hanggang sa mamatay. (sighed) So, here I am… What I am now? You can say, I am a wife, sexually and physically used by my husband according to his own time of desires and needs. I am a wife, who is financially and emotionally, mentally abused by my husband. I am a wife PROFESSIONALLY CONNED BY MY HUSBAND BEFORE HE CONNED OTHER PEOPLE.. I am his long term conned victim.

[can-i-just-say-this]

I'm Coming Home to You

Harry Potter's 25 lives inspired by '25 Lives' by Tongari

Part 2

11. Yet, always, you forgive me.

There is blood in every inch Harry looks on Draco's clothes, and his heart breaks at his lover's weak smile.

"Harry, it's okay."

It's not. Harry is finally able to make Draco his in this lifetime after so many agonizing hundred years, and yet he can't save his partner. Even though he is the best investigator ever walks on this country. They were just in a childplay mission, and yet Harry miscalculated their numbers and moved too late to shield Draco that is not in his bulletproof uniform since he was spying for them.

"Please don't leave me. I'm not ready-"

Draco closes his eyes, and so Harry waits for this life to pass.

12. As if you understand what’s going on

For once, Harry is the one dying this time. He counts every second he can still hear from the clock, feeling every tears falling to his cheeks as Draco cries quietly. Draco is holding his hand, and it's the only warmth Harry can feel besides his rapidly freezing body. Harry searches for Draco's face, and his husband is smiling at him, nodding.

"Harry, it's okay."

Harry smiles back, finally it won't be painful whenever he remembers Draco saying those words.

"I'll see you soon."

And so Harry closes his eyes.

13. And you’re making up for all the lifetimes in which one of us doesn’t exist,

The bookshelves rattle as Draco slams Harry's body, kissing every part of his face down to his shoulder like there's no tomorrow. Harry can only hold onto him, waiting for the inevitable. Just then, Draco sinks his fangs in Harry's neck and finally, finally drinks his intake of Harry's blood for the week. Harry shivers, never getting used to this.

"Stop, Malfoy, I'm not fainting in class again."

"Just skip it with me."

Malfoy stopped though, licking Harry's wound to heal it and stared at him with blood red eyes that rapidly turn into their normal grey colour. Harry also can't get used to that.

"Yeah, because I just love to give Snape another reason to drop me."

He glares, but soon Malfoy is kissing him again, and suddenly Harry is not sure he'll attend Chemistry today.

14. And the ones where we just, barely, never meet.

Hermione is screaming and tearing her bushy hair in their living room, Harry is not shocked.

"We were supposed to work on this project together, Harry, we are supposed to meet next week, in this freaking room at this second, and I just knew today that he's moving abroad, to Tokyo of all places! Can you believe this?"

Harry knows that Hermione can finish whatever project it is on her own, but he also knows to shut his mouth when necessary. So he decides to brighten his best friend's mood instead.

"And who is this asshole we need to track down to the Anime World?"

"It's Draco Malfoy and I swear to God I will find his new address and-"

Harry stops listening, his head suddenly has blooming headache and he wonders if it's the sleep deprivation catching up to him.

Later, after a long nap and waking up with tears streaming down his face, Harry plans a long life trip to Japan. Fifty years later, when Harry is visiting Hermione in her lovely cottage, the news inform him that a tsunami has hit the country he barely left few hours ago, and Harry's world is crashing down hearing the name Draco Malfoy for the second time in this life.

15. I hate those. I prefer the ones in which you kill me.

Draco is trembling, so Harry hugs him tighter, but it only makes Draco scream in agony, though no sound is coming out. Harry knows his time is limited, but he doesn't know what to say, now that fate decides it's fascinating to have him on the opposite side of the war from Draco. The hand holding the sword piercing through his body falls to his waist, and his lover is hugging back.

"I hate you. I really hate you. I hate you the most in this universe."

Harry tries to speak, but he's only coughing blood to Draco's back. He tries again.

"I love you. Please win. Please stay alive. Please-"

Harry closes his eyes.

16. But when all’s said and done, I’d surrender to you in other ways.

"You can't do this, Harry. Not again. Hermione, help me here."

Hermione only raises her eyebrow at her boyfriend, and he groaned again. They both know it's a lost cause and settle on watching Harry together. Harry doesn't even listen to his best mate complaining, his eyes fixed on the Marauder Maps in his lap. When Ron whispered 'Mischief managed' and he suddenly sees a blank parchment though, he shouts.

"Oi!"

"Oi to you too, Harry! You're obsessed! It's sixth year all over again! No, it's even worse! You have to stop, mate!"

Harry would, if only he knew how to.

17. Even though each time, I know I’ll see you again, I always wonder

Draco is leaning against him, hooking his arms. His eyes searching for cameras and he fakes a shy smile at him. There's no need to search, honestly, fans always capture The Drarry Moments like every bit of their interactions is a secret affair. Harry doesn't mind, though, as long as he has Draco close to him.

"I'm coming, I'm coming home to you, right now I'm home, oh I'm home, baby"

Harry sings his part, making sure to look at Draco with heart in his eyes, something he doesn't really need to fake. Draco smiles genuinely this time, and Harry's heart is screaming with their fans. Maybe deciding that the fans have enough Drarry pics in one concert, Draco moves away. Harry watches Draco wave to their adoring fans, making heart with his hands. Ah, Draco's part is coming next. Harry feigns surprise when Draco stares at him with love in his eyes.

"Today, tomorrow, I'm coming home to you, only you"

18. Is this the last time?

"Are you sure that's the right colour?"

"Are you questioning my potion skill, Potter?"

Harry shakes his head. Draco's forehead is covered with droplets of sweat now, and Harry doesn't think before he sweep them with his sleeve. Draco doesn't react, his eyes still staring at his potion as if daring it to misbehave. When five minutes pass and the potion turns blue, Draco is staring wide eyed at Harry.

"I did it. Potter, I did it! I'm getting the fucking degree!"

And Harry just looks at him, how Draco squeal and squeeze his fingers, how his own fingers shake a little when he write the right formula of his invented potion on the parchment. How he gathers various Potion books while tears are streaming down his face, his exhaustion finally catching up to him, and once again, Harry sees the boy and the man he has loved for more than a lifetime in new adoration.

"I love you", he wants to blurt out, but this Draco is not ready to hear that, so Harry whispers the words instead. He is quite afraid he won't be able to say those words ever again, but when Draco talks about his bright future as the youngest Potion Master that receives the Order of Merlin, Harry smiles to his friend.

19. Is that really you?

Harry is gripping his book like a lifeline, his heart drumming in his ribcage. The queue is too long, and Harry is afraid he's going to be late for his meeting. God knows what McGonagall is going to say, but he needs this. Harry turns his book around, the name 'Draconis' in bold green letters below the book's tittle, 'Coming Home'.

"Harry, she's going to fire you"

Hermione hisses, her own book swaying to his face. Harry knows this, too, and he feels like crying. Hermione misinterprets this and says softly.

"I'll ask him to sign your book, alright? Now go."

And Harry does. Draconis never comes to London after that, so Harry never get the chance to come to his book signing again. Not even once.

20. And what if you're already perfectly happy without me?

Harry already learned how to fake smiles long before Draco Malfoy announces his engagement in front of the press. He sits there as if his heart isn't breaking and speak his congratulations to the senior actor that is his one-sided love, and he can already imagine one of the article saying how Harry Potter, the rising star, plays a huge part in the developing love of his seniors in the filming site. Wonderful.

"I almost thought I didn't have the chance, but then there was Harry Potter, and he said he had been my fan since forever, and suddenly I had this huge courage and asked Pansy out the next hour. Really, thank you, Harry."

Perfect.

[fandom-queenliness]

The Breaking

This is a continuation/prequel of my fic The Burning, which is inspired by Burn/First burn from Hamilton and features Marinette confronting Adrien. You can read it here. You can read the rest of the series here. This here is Chloe, Nino, and Kagami’s reactions to Adrien coming forward. I couldn’t actually do them confronting Adrien without making this really long, so I’ll do that as a second part. This does not have a song that it’s based on. Anyway, enjoy!

The Breaking

Nino was absently listening to the television while he brushed his teeth at the kitchen sink, wondering what kind of snack he should get on his way to work.

“Hey babe?” He yelled around his toothbrush.

Alya looked up from her files. “Yeah?”

“Blueberry or chocolate muffin?”

She laughed at him and he beamed. He loved her, and sometimes he couldn’t believe he had gotten to marry her.

“Banana,” she said decidedly. “Much healthier than chocolate, and it won’t make your teeth purple.”

“This is why I married you,” Nino told her. She smiled, shook her head, and turned back to her files, spread out on the couch. The TV turned to the news. Adrien appeared in front of a group of reporters.

“Al,” he said. She looked up and he pointed to the TV. “Adrien’s on the news. What do you think, new Gabriel line?”

Alya didn’t answer, just frowned and turned the volume up. Nino frowned too. She had an eye for things he didn’t, and he didn’t like the look she had on her face.

“Mr. Agreste!” One reporter called out on screen. “Can you tell us why you have called this conference?”

“Certainly,” Adrien said into the microphones clustered in front of him. “I am here today for one simple reason; to come clean.”

Nino stopped brushing his teeth and stared at the screen in confusion. What on earth would his best friend have to come clean about?

“This story starts with a fellow model,” Adrien said, his voice controlled. “A co-worker of mine, Mark Sandler, expressed confusion a few weeks ago as to why I was disappearing often, why I was more tired than usual. Why I was taking more jobs abroad. He came to a conclusion; that I was doing drugs.”

A murmur ran through the crowd. Nino stared in shock. Adrien? Drugs? Adrien?

“Monsieur Sandler was wrong,” Adrien announced calmly. “I was not doing drugs of any kind. But I was, however, engaging in an affair with another fellow model, Sophia Ketch.”

The toothbrush fell from Nino’s hand. Alya stood up. How… how could he do this? On the screen, Adrien steamed rolled on determinedly.

“The affair started eighteen months ago, during a modelling shoot in the Greek isles. Ketch and I were already friends, but, as the trip dragged on, we grew closer. Everything was fine, until one night. When, while under the influence of alcohol, we slept together.”

Oh god, oh god, oh god. Nino’s head was reeling, and he stumbled back from the screen, staring in horror. He loved Adrien, but this, this—he didn’t understand.

“I was ashamed,” Adrien said truthfully. “I regretted it, so very much. I asked Ketch to never to talk of it again. I made it clear that nothing would ever happen between us. We went back to normal for the next few days. We were cordial, and nothing more.”

Adrien took a breath and rubbed his face. Nino pitied him for a moment before he remembered what he was saying. Betrayal, even once, it was despicable.

“But then, just a few days later, we slept together again,” the model said on screen. Nino’s breath hitched. Again. Twice. And not even drunk.

“I can’t explain why; I was tired, I was stressed. But somehow, we decided that we would enjoy each other, at least until the trip ended. After, we would never speak of it again.”

“Marinette,” Alya whispered. Worry rose up and nearly choked Nino. Marinette, Marinette, what would she say?  Did she know?

“Alya,” Nino said. She turned. He saw the accusations in her eyes. Did you know?

He shook his head. No, I swear. “What are we going to do?”

Alya fumbled for her phone, hands shaking with rage. “I have to tell Marinette—god is she going to be okay? Nino, Nino is she going to be okay?”

He didn’t know. He had known her since they had been children, but he didn’t know. How would she react?

Something in him was snapping, like a branch under pressure. As Adrien spoke, Nino felt some part of his love for him—break.

“Alya.” Tears welled up in his eyes and she came over to take his hands in hers. How could he claim to have known Adrien when he had lied to him for months? Lied to Marinette?

Alya saw his pain and shook her head helplessly. “Nino, Nino I know, I never thought he would—” she fell into silence for a moment, staring at the screen. “We need to find Marinette.”

Nino wiped away his tears and nodded, drawing himself up, bricking away that sore betrayal and broken trust. Marinette would be hurting more than he would. Her husband, his best friend.

“Let’s go,” he murmured, tearing his eyes away from the screen, from the friend he thought he could trust.

“Nino, are you sure you can do this?” Alya’s eyes were soft but unforgiving. “If you dare try to excuse what he’s done—”

“How could you say that?” he shot back. “Marinette has been my friend since childhood. I love her like my own blood. Adrien—” pain, raw, horrible hurtful pain “—he, he’s nothing now. To me. I feel—nothing.”

Alya shook her head. “That’s not true. You feel hurt, you feel betrayed.”

“I—I thought I knew him.” But had he? Had he ever realised how blind his friend was to the hurts of others? “Alya, he’s my best friend. I should have known.”

Nino turned to the screen. He could barely see the boy he met at fourteen. There was only a liar. Drunkenness could maybe excuse the first betrayal, but nothing, nothing, could justify a second one or the lying.

“Alya,” Nino said softly, staring at his once friend speak. “Let’s find Mari.”

“Then what?” She asked.

Nino turned away from the TV, “After I make sure she is okay, I am going to Adrien, and I am making sure he realises what he has done.”

Kagami dropped her sabre in shock as she stared at the television. She had walked into the parlour room, still sweaty from fencing practice, and paused when she saw Adrien. But when he started speaking, her curiosity turned to loathing.

“I got an email after the trip,” the model said, his face closed off. “From Ketch’s ex-boyfriend, Thomas Jones. He told me he had proof – texts, recorded calls – that I had slept with her, and that unless I paid him, he would tell everyone.”

Kagami felt anger rising up but she squashed it down. Rage clashed with all the lessons her mother had taught her. She had to get all the facts first—but Marinette—don’t make rash decisions—but Marinette.

How could she stand there, numb, while her dear friend was inevitably hurting somewhere, just now learning of Adrien’s betrayal? Kagami knew him, she knew he was too much of a coward to face Marinette himself with the news. She knew this would be the first Marinette would be hearing of this. The urge to run him through with her sabre grew harder to ignore.

Adrien continued speaking, oblivious to Kagami’s internal conflict. “He was obsessed with Ketch and had tapped her phone. In doing so, he had discovered evidence of our short affair. He ordered me to pay. I wanted to refuse, to tell him I would do no such thing. But I did not want to hurt my wife.”

Kagami scoffed at that. She knew he only cared for how his reputation would have been hurt by an affair. And now here he was, revealing everything because he had decided that an affair mattered less than false drug charges.

“I knew if my wife learned of my mistake,” Adrien said. “She would be devastated. I was ashamed, so I agreed to pay Ketch’s ex, and sent the first installment of money that day.”

Liar, bastard. He did not truly understand the depth of what he had done. If he knew, he would not be grovelling for forgiveness on a screen, he would—should—be begging Marinette for it.

“When I met Jones for the first time, at his apartment, he warned the evidence he had would be released automatically if anything happened to him. It was blackmail, but I went along with it.”

Blackmail—Blackmail, if he had cared for Marinette at all, he would have told her the minute he realised what he had done the first night and never would have gotten into this mess. Kagami’s hands tightened into fists at his face, so clearly begging acceptance from the public. All he cared about, not his wonderful wife, not his family, not the trust that he had broken in Kagami, but his reputation. His image.

“Ketch found me after the first meeting and told me Jones did not care if we continued seeing each other. And well, to me it meant nothing, I was already paying for my mistake. So I agreed, we would continue our affair.” Adrien’s voice was mournful, but she knew it was all part of that perfect act he had created, his way of keeping up the image his father had built for him as a model. The image Adrien grew into. Kagami’s fingers twitched.

“In the following weeks we just… continued on with our lives. It was only sex, there was no love between us. Even as I drowned in my guilt, I continued to meet with Ketch for our rendezvous.” The reports hurriedly wrote that down.

Her fury jackhammered and her hand found her sabre again. She found her grip and clenched on tight, battling the urge to lash out in rage. Marinette was all she could see, her face as she learned of yet another betrayal, another set of lies her husband had told.

“I was disgusted with myself,” Adrien said. “I was betraying my marriage vows. And there was no excuse for that. But as I held no love for Ketch, I could rest easy knowing my wife held my affections alone. Ketch knew this and did not once asked for more than my company and body. We conducted it during shoots abroad, with discretion. Using motels, her own apartment, and my house when my wife and children were on trips. Five days out of seven we were engaging in our affair. Though there was never a feeling of love for her.”

Kagami growled at Adrien’s words, red filled her vision but she beat it back. Just wait, wait until he’s in front of you and then you can make him feel the pain he’s caused, she told herself.

A maid appeared, pale and wide-eyed. “Mademoiselle Tsurugi? Are you well?”

Kagami had just enough of control to nod once, never taking her eyes off the screen. “Sarah, please bring a car around. I will be making a few visits today. And please ensure there is a tablet inside, set to the news channel.”

The poor maid nodded fearfully at the fire in her eyes. “Yes, ma’am.” She disappeared.

Kagami stared at Adrien, sitting there calmly as if he had not destroyed everything. She looked at him and felt nothing. Nothing of the friendship that might have been there. It had broken apart the moment he revealed the truth.

She would go Marinette, she would check on her, comfort her if need be, and then she would go to Adrien and let loose all the loathing that was growing in her bones.

She walked to her room, removing her practice gear and throwing on whatever outfit she saw first, too blinded by revulsion to care. She left her sabre behind. Though she wished she could impale Adrien with it, she knew he would not let her near to him with it in her hands. He had enough common sense enough to realise that.

Kagami stalked back into the parlour, glaring at Adrien as he calmly sipped water. Were the other’s watching? Most likely. She was eager to see who else would be joining her in punishing Adrien.

The maid reappeared. “The car is ready mademoiselle.”

“Merci,” Kagami said coldly, stalking out the door with a mission on her mind:

1. Check on Marinette

2. Make Adrien pay

Chloe dropped her tea cup into its saucer and stared.

She stared in horror and confusion and shock as her oldest friend confessed to the most horrible thing she could ever imagine.

Oh god… Marinette.

An affair, lying, blackmail. He had done the one thing Chloe had prayed he would never do, hurt Marinette.

“Of all the things…” she whispered aloud, her own voice so weighed down by betrayal and pain she barely recognised it.

Chloe was not blind to Adrien’s faults, but she had done such horrible things in her youth, so really, who was she to call him out on it? But Marinette. Hurting Marinette was crossing a line, and Chloe was not above taking sides.

She stood up, moving closer to the screen, staring at her friend as he kept talking, feeling a little bit of her faith in him breaking away with every word.

“I felt horrible.” His face did not seem all the guilt-ridden. “I was being manipulated, blackmailed, extorted. But I knew that if I wanted to protect my wife, I had to continue to pay Jones. Everything I was doing, was for my family, my children.”

Rage exploded behind Chloe’s eyes and suddenly she was glaring at Adrien, glaring at him and hating him. He didn’t care about Emma and Hugo, or even Marinette, all he cared about was his image. Even now, he is driven by how people see him, to see him as the good little boy so they’ll like him. In the hopes his father will care. So he can get what he wants.

“Sabrina.” The woman walked into the room at Chloe’s call, holding a phone in her hands with the exact same interview playing on its screen. Sabrina’s green eyes were round and shocked.

“Chloe,” she asked softly. “Are you okay?”

The blonde shook her head. “No, but I don’t matter right now. Get a car ready. I’m going to Marinette.”

Sabrina nodded firmly and typed something into her phone. “Anything else?” Her words were confident now, no longer the shy girl Chloe had hurt as a teenager.

“I need a moment to… think,” Chloe said.

Sabrina nodded, then came over and hugged her. “Give him hell,” she whispered. Chloe knew she meant Adrien. She was Marinette’s friend too.

“I will,” Chloe promised.

Sabrina pulled away and check her phone. “The car will be ready in a few minutes. I’ll go see if I can speed it up.” She paused at the door. “Do you want me to call Mademoiselle Maria?”

Chloe shook her head. “No, thank you.” She did not want her girlfriend to be part of this. Things would be getting personal, and sweet Maria had no place in it. “Thank you, Sabrina.”

Her friend nodded and left.

Chloe steeled herself and then turned back to the television.

“It was a few weeks ago that a fellow model, Mark Sanders, grew suspicious of my behaviour,” Adrien said, voice tired and drawn, but still, still begging for forgiveness from the press. “My disappearances, how I took more trips abroad, how I was looking haggard and tired. He jumped to the conclusion that I was using drugs. When he confronted me, I was so tired of lying that I just told him the truth. The affair, the blackmail, everything. He backed off, for a time.”

Pain, pain and hurt and betrayal, that was all Chloe could feel when she looked at Adrien. Love, yes, but it felt broken somehow, tainted, changed. Once she may have taken his side, but now, now she had Emma and Hugo to think of, seeing their father confess he had betrayed their mother. And then there was Marinette, who had somehow forgiven Chloe for what she had done, who had become a friend to her despite it all. She had them to think about, and Adrien had become someone who hurt them. She would hurt him back.

“I knew Sanders would start blackmailing me as well,” Adrien announced. “He had always been a rival for my position as the face of the company, and I knew he would do anything to take it from me or make my life miserable. So, I decided to stop my affair with Ketch, stopped paying Jones, and organised this conference to come forward.” He stared right into the camera, Chloe met his eyes and desperately tried to see the boy she had known once. That boy slipped away, and she saw the face of the man who broke apart a friendship and a family in the name of his reputation.

“Have you told you wife yet?” A reporter hollered from the crowd. That got the other journalists hyped up. The pushed forward like sharks in a frenzy.

Adrien hesitated and for the first time since the conference began the press agent beside him leaned and whispered something into his ear.

“No comment at this time,” Adrien told them. That only got hoard more interested at the started hurling questions at him.

“I am tired of being controlled in the shadows,” Adrien said over their shouts. “I am coming forward, making my mistakes public, so I may face judgment in the light. Thank you for your time.” He stood and walked out of the room, blocked from the press by guards. Chloe watched him leave with revulsion.

He would regret what he had done.

“The car’s ready,” Sabrina announced at the door.

“Thank you,” Chloe told her, stepping out of her room at the hotel and walking down to the elevator.

Adrien and hurt more than his family. He had hurt Nino, and Alya, and Kagami and Chloe. Felix would be seething too. An old part of her cruel-self smiled to imagine what hell they would be able to rain down on Adrien together.

Adrien was no longer dealing with his friends.

He was dealing with the people he had hurt.

And that meant Chloe would not be holding back when she came for him.

Dun, dun, duuuuuuuuuuuun!

Next up is part 2 of this. Hope you guys enjoyed!

[utopiannamjoon]

Ephemeral, part 8 [Final]

Genre: Smut, Angst, Fluff, Business au

Pairing: Jimin x reader, Namjoon x reader

Warning: slight swearing and somewhat slut shaming

Words: 7k

Synopsis: You had everything from the materialistic world but all of them were useless to you when you had to share them with a man who didn’t love you. You never thought you’d be genuinely happy until someone approached you. An affair that turned your life upside down.

You can find links to all of the parts in my masterlist, linked in bio

~~

Your life living in the guest room of Suzie’s house was beginning to feel normal even though it was the opposite of how you used to life. The mansion you had made you feel empty and hollow despite the rooms being filled with designer items and decorations you chose. It didn’t take you long to get used to the atmosphere of love and friendship as it was something you’ve always dreamed of since you were a child and saw how others lived differently from your family. But you never thought that would be you.

Suzie didn’t complain or hint at the fact that you’ve been living with her for months now without paying rent. She told you that she is doing this because she loved you and refused every cent you tried to offer her - so you tried to do everything in the house from the cleaning to cooking. You wondered what did you do in your previous life to deserve her.

Jimin was happy, his eyes would be half lid when you looked at you with the familiar smile planted on his face but something was eating at him, you couldn’t tell what it was. The uncertainty kept creeping in when the weeks went by. He would come home from whichever farm he got work for that day, eyebags bigger than you’ve ever seen them but still he would have a smile on and try to hide his exhaustion. The blisters on his hands were starting to heal so it made you relieved that he was doing something less physical.

You heard the door open so you dusted your hands on the apron and peaked from the kitchen. Jimin kicked off his shoes and stretched out his arms before seeing you from the corner, and the smile appeared on his lips.

“You’re home earlier than I expected,” You commented and motioned for him to come hug you, which he gladly did, “You have good timing, dinner is ready.”

“We aren’t ordering pizza?” Jimin nudged you. The pizza boxes had their own deserved pile on the counter from the many times the three of you were too tired or just plain lazy to cook since now you couldn’t just order someone to come cook a full course meal for you. “This is a nice surprise, and fitting since I have something to tell you.” Jimin took a seat and Suzie laid a plate for him and then took a seat herself.

“Just thinking about pizza makes me nauseous,” Suzie scoffed and shoved her mouth full, “Homemade food is ten times better.”

“You’re not wrong there.”

“I know I’m not.” She grinned. She is never wrong.

Jimin huffed and shook his head. Taking the ladle in his hand and pouring the sauce on his plate, he looked at you, “But how was your day? Restocking and refilling?”

“Yeah, same old same old,” you nodded and bit your lip. “You know, the usual.”

“C’mon you always have a story to tell.” He egged you on, “Did that old man come by for fish bait again?”

“No, not this time but someone else did,” You mirrored his smile, “A banker. We got to talking and he suggested a loan.”

”No,” Jimin said simply in between bites, without his expression wavering in anyway.

”But if we talked to him about it and the options, we could move -”

While Jimin set down his cutlery, he and Suzie made eye contact. Her lips pulled a flat line and the pace she was eating in slowed down.

”No,” Jimin repeated himself firmly but his smile was nowhere to be seen anymore. ”They won’t lend me money.” He made sure to stress every word more than the last one.

“I’m sure if we went in there for a chat we could figure out a plan or something.” The voice you spoke with wasn’t as confident as it was before. The way he denied you so soon had you confused.

”We won’t get a loan. My pay isn’t stable enough and after I lost my high ranking job and all of my possessions they aren’t looking at me very kindly.” He spoke with his head down while glancing at Suzie and the plate in front of you, trying his best to avoid your eyes, ”I don’t want to continue this discussion.”

”You don’t know that. We’ll go there together and we can figure out something because we both work.” You suggested since it was a good choice in your opinion. It wouldn’t hurt you in any case.

”You went from being unemployed to working on the cash register at a small general store. A job that you’ve had for less than half a year. A teenager has more experience in the eyes of a bank.” He finally looked at you, “Namjoon has always taken care of money for you so you haven’t had to worry about a thing. It isn’t as simple as walking in and signing a piece of paper like you seem to think.”

Silence set in and Suzie was looking down at her plate with her tongue in her cheek. The chair screech was the only thing to break the agonizing sound of crickets when you got up and marched for the front door.

“Babe - Babe, don’t walk out,” Jimin sighed as you walked by but you didn’t react. This isn’t the ideal living situation but you won’t take this attitude when you’ve just cooked after coming home from work. You’ve had a hard day of work too, he isn’t the only one having a physical job with having to wake up earlier than the rooster.

”Wow, good job.” Suzie scoffed when you were by the front door pulling on your shoes, ”That’s basically telling her that she is useless and has done nothing in her life.”

”Don’t start with me, you know that’s not what I meant. She’s ruining everything.” Jimin told her with an angrier tone than you would’ve ever wished for. His utensils hit the plate again and he buried his face in his hands, ”This isn’t what I wanted. What about us?”

“Life doesn’t always go along with your plans, pull yourself together.”

~

You spent quite a while walking in the surrounding forests trying to empty your mind. Thoughts of you overreacting started to fill your mind, he was right after all. It’s not like your life has been hard. You haven’t had to work for anything - well except for your degree that ended up being useless since you weren’t allowed to intervene in Namjoon’s or your father’s business. You helped out Namjoon in a lot of things for sure but no one would hire you based on that alone. It wasn’t a real job sending out invitations and organizing gatherings when it’s only for your husband.

Organizing anything for Namjoon was always a hassle. He would change his mind constantly and somehow you were at fault for not reading his mind.

Nothing seemed to go forward. You’re stuck with your boyfriend living in your best friend’s house and there wasn’t a way out. You couldn’t lend money from anyone, not from a bank or your parents and you refused to put Suzie in that position.

You haven’t had any contact with your parents since of your divorce when your father called you a disgrace while your mother stood by him with the sulkiest look on her face - probably wanting to grow the guts to leave the horrific relationship she’s been stuck in since she was 18. That nearly happened to you too.

Honestly, would it have been better? If Jimin is regretting everything, is it good to continue? You did this decision together because you wanted to, forgetting the life you had before and leaving the material possessions with it. Maybe you’re so used to the lavish lifestyle that getting started from zero is absolutely impossible.

You have no traits or experience with the real world. Your dad has handed everything to you.

The surrounding trees went high but they were nothing compared to the concrete towers you’ve gotten used to since you were a child but it was something so freeing. The nature around you was so pure of anything evil, bushes, tree trunks and leaves were there for you to respect. You’re equal to the animal counterparts that ran through the grounds and branches.

Nothing in your previous life was equal. Your dad was the head of the family and you and your mother had no authority to intervene. With your marriage with Namjoon you had the choice to decide if you wanted to decorate the dining room with roses or tulips once he had guests over.

Jimin talked to you like you were sound in the head, finally making you feel like you were worthy and your opinions aren’t just made up in an emotional outburst. What a shame that everything was going down the drain. Something had to be done.

Your phone vibrated in your back pocket and you checked the notifications. Great. You felt foolish getting your hopes up that someone was finally trying to contact you. The battery is near dead and there was so sign of Jimin or even Suzie trying to message or call you.

It’s not like one text message from him would make everything better but it would show that he cared. It’s hugely disappointing even though you weren’t expecting him to crawl back to you, like you always did to Namjoon. Maybe it was your time to submit to his will, it wasn’t any different from your previous life after all.

~

You didn’t go home. You didn’t hear from anyone. Not a call nor a text message. You slept at the general store’s back room that was equipped with a bed and a quilt, not the ideal sleeping place but it would do. The owners would understand and wouldn’t make a big deal out of it.

You organized the shelves and took care of the inventory, filling up the papers and putting everything in their respected places. Your day could’ve started better but you weren’t the one to complain - out loud at least.

Seeing the faces of your regular customers made you push off the thoughts of Jimin as you served and helped them get what they wanted. You got an apple for the old man’s horse and new batch of worms for his fishing trip this evening. His stories never bored you, they reminded you of the stories you read in secrecy from your parents, you wanted to witness all of those things too and now you’re a step closer to that childhood dream.

The man waved goodbye to you after his horse feasted on the bright red apple, leaving a smile on your face as you went to continue your duties.

It didn’t take long until the door opened and you heard the familiar ring from the bell, you yelled, “I’ll be right there.” from the back. You dusted your hands from the flower puffing out of the bag and walked to the register.

“This is an absolute downgrade.” A man in a black jacked sneered, looking down on his nose to you, ”This is an humiliation to your family. You should be ashamed of yourself.”

Your heart dropped to your stomach and your head got empty upon seeing him. Your only wish was to never see him again,

“Dad…”

“How could you trade to this?” He looked around with his nose wrinkled and full of disappointment. ”Didn’t you have everything?

“I - “

“Namjoon is willing to take you back if you do it respectfully. I talked to him and he isn’t carrying ill will with him.” He swiped his index finger on the counter and ended up staring at it in utmost disgust. How could you do this to him?

“I’m not going back to him. He doesn’t treat me well.” You uttered.

“Is this about love? Whats going on with you? Do you think that matters?” He moved his disappointed gaze to yours. The simple move made you feel like you were nothing, like you were the size of an ant and forgotten by the society. ”You will learn to live with him, you’re not a teen anymore. You’re being selfish in turning him down. What I can’t imagine that he is willing to take you back, I would’ve thrown your mother out in the curb if she did that to me. What’s even worse I can’t talk to my business partners when they ask about my daughter. What will i tell them?”

“So, it’s about you? Tell them your kid finally thinks for herself,” You stated. It’s never up to you to make choice in your life. “Do you manipulate mom as well?” You knew you crossed the line but you didn’t care or you thought you didn’t. The shout made you jump regardless.

“Don’t talk to me like that!” He warned you, loudly, using the deep voice he told you off since you have been a toddler, ”You will leave Jimin and we’ll forget this ever happened. You’re acting like a whore, getting together with a married man.”

You didn’t know what to say. You stared at each other in complete silence but only the one of you felt frightened. Your dad has always been quick to raise his voice especially when he didn’t get what he wanted. It’s his way. No compromises.

“Where do you live?” He finally asked when you moved to look at the tip of your shoes, “With him, supposedly. Namjoon didn’t give you a thing in the divorce, rightfully so. You don’t deserve anything. I don’t give you any monetary support for these actions…” He pondered for a second, “It’s suzie, isn’t it?”

“No.” You shook your head with glowy eyes. You knew he was going to do something.

“Let’s go. Close this hell hole and let’s go.” He demanded, “I’m going alone if you’re not joining with me.”

You flipped the sign hanging on the door to ”closed” when you followed your father outside with your head hanging low. Jimin isn’t supposed to be home yet and Suzie is often out doing her own business so you crossed your fingers that there wasn’t going to be more fighting. Or you couldn’t say you fought your father since the man has always been the ruler in your life. You feared him.

The car ride was only few minutes but it felt like an eternity. Silence only broken when he yelled at you for being a total loser and not thinking of your best interest. You should have been with Namjoon until death do you apart, that’s how it’s meant to go whether you liked it or not.

Your father ripped the door open with his strong grip and the house got possessed with his terrifying presence. You stepped in after him but for your misfortune the house wasn’t empty.

Jimin and Suzie sat on the couch, facing each other and giggling like school girls when you walked after your father to the living room. A weird feeling set in your stomach, making you feel more uneasy by the second. When did they become that close?

Jimin noticed you and your father standing in the hallway. The smile on his face dropped when he saw you but the color drained away when he realized who was standing right there beside you - a man whose face took away the tiniest bit of happiness in your soul once has.

Suzie followed Jimin’s gaze and was quick to retract her hand from his to behind her back. Her eyes were about to fall out from the intensity they captivated. She has always succeeded in protecting her own honor except when against your father.

”Sir -” Jimin stood up frantically, feeling his heart jump in his throat. He was baffled seeing your father like this. A part of him wished he wouldn’t have to face him ever again. They’ve talked during dinners but the man was not easy to talk to.

”Mr. Park, how lovely it is to see you.” Your dad said the kind words with a toxic tone and a small smirk, ”Let’s get down to business, shall we?” He clasped his hands together and the menacing look set on his face, “You got in my daughter’s small brain and in return you lost your possessions. Its clear to say that you’re insane and cannot take care of yourself let alone my offspring. Especially now that you made that sacrifice and have another slut with you right there.”

”Sir, I can -”

”No. You’re not hearing me. You’re nothing, dust. You’re an absolute imbecile for leaving your life behind and all for her.” Your father kept accusing, now being frank, as if his previous comments were kind from the get go.

”Do NOT talk about her like that.” Jimin raised his voice which made everybody take a step back - even your father. He was always such a smooth and a kind talker so it caught everybody’s attention. Jimin breathed in and explained himself. ”Sir, I did what I felt was the right thing to do.”

”Mr. Park are you criticizing my way of parenting?” Your father purposefully brushed off his comment and the friendly tone, “You should’ve thought with your head instead of your smaller self downstairs. Look where it got you. You’re regretting all of it.”

”I’m not.” Jimin’s lips rose up from a small, warm smile that caught your attention. There it was. The beautiful and genuine smile you missed for a day - that he shared with Suzie while you were gone, neither of them trying to contact you. ”I’d make the same decision in a heartbeat. I know you’re cold enough not to care about love but I love your daughter. I’m inlove with her. I will marry her with or without your approval. I don’t care about your opinion.” He motioned his hand towards the door, ”I suggest you to leave, we don’t have anything to converse about.”

”Is that a threat?” He scoffed, taking in everything that fit his agenda, ”She will go back to Namjoon. Your feelings don’t dictate anything. She won’t stay with you any longer.”

”If that’s her wish.” Jimin agreed which made your father grow the most smug smile you’ve ever seen.

He grabbed your arm and pulled you towards the door but you held your ground and wouldn’t budge.

”What’re you doing?” He looked up from your shoes stuck to the ground to your face.

”I’m not going to Namjoon.” You whispered out and shook your head, that’s everything you got out.

You were beginning to see the fumes escaping your dad’s ears when he looked between you and Jimin with eerie eyes. His lip twitched as he was about to say something, but he spat on the floor and turned on his heel, the door leaving a loud bang after he shot out, not being used to people opposing him. His intimidating persona made it virtually impossible to disagree.

Jimin took quick steps and walked by you to the front door, seeing himself if your dad was actually leaving. Your dad spoke on his phone as he speeded off the yard, leaving tire marks deep in the gravel.

Jimin joined you to the living room, being unsure who to look at. He looked at Suzie who shrugged, she had no idea what just happened.

Everyone stood still, completely baffled at what just happened. Your dad stormed in and started to accuse everybody.

“Why was he here? Did you call him?” He turned to you but you didn’t answer - you didn’t like that question. Why would’ve you called him? You hated your father more than Jimin did, he didn’t even have that big of a reason to hate him.

The odd feeling in your stomach wouldn’t die down, instead it made its way up your esophagus. You didn’t say a thing when you bolted to the bathroom, hand on your mouth to not spill everywhere, leaving Suzie and Jimin even more confused.

“Are you not feeling well? Are you sick?” Jimin had followed you to the otherside of the house, making sure to hold your hair up when he noticed that you were in fact spilling your guts out. “Is it because of your dad? Did- did he touch you?!”

You shook your head and spat your mouth empty before rinsing your mouth at the sink while Suzie and Jimin stared at your back intently.

Your eyes met Suzie’s through the mirror and you felt something you had never felt towards her. Jealousy. Everytime your heart banged and sent blood flowing through you it felt worse. She was the one keeping him company while you were gone, probably telling him to forget about your little tantrum.

Jimin kept asking you a bunch of questions but you denied them, just saying no and brushing them off. You didn’t feel sick or too bad for that matter. You just had to throw up.

~

You’ve tried your best in avoiding your two roommates despite the efforts they’ve put in trying to talk to you and get you to engage with them. You didn’t like to see them together or in the same room just talking to each other because the unexplained jealousy would just spike in you. They made you angry if you’re honest. It didn’t seem fair.

You sat on the sofa with a teacup in hand watching some soap-opera from the tv when Jimin came to sit next to you, turning his whole body to face you.

“Honey, if you’re not feeling that well we should visit the doctor.” He sounded genuinely worried but you had an inkling he knew something was up.

“No, I’m fine.” You brushed him off.

“Just a quick little visit, I’ll be there too.”

You shook your head and sipped on you tea, eyes fixated on the screen.

“Are you sure? I could borrow Suzie’s pickup to take you.”

“I’m sure.” You sighed and turned off the tv while standing up and walking away. “Stop pressuring me.”

~

You stood right outside of the tall building, looking up at the biggest pentroom apartment the building had, something Jimin had bought and then eventually let go.

“We can still go back.” Jimin turned to face your profile with the bus schedule open from his phone.

“No, we are here, we’ll go in.” You nodded.

“Are you sure?”

“I am.” You nodded again.

“I don’t want to make you do anything that makes you uncomfortable. I just thought it would be good to accept the invitation to let people know that we’re doing great.”

“It is.”

“Are you still feeling well? We don’t have to do this.”

You rolled your eyes at his question that his insecurities fueled on. You’re already here and you didn’t even feel that bad, though Jiwoo’s birthday party couldn’t have come at a worse time - your relationship has hit a rock that the other party had no idea of. Jimin couldn’t have skipped the party since he and Jiwoo didn’t have anything against each other. She was surprisingly understanding of his situation, it was just her outer appearance didn’t give that vibe about her.

“I’m fine.” You stated with a dramatically loud exhale, “Let’s just get in.”

Jiwoo opened the door with a huge smile planted on her face and she took no time to hug you and Jimin, welcoming you in. She handed you two champagne glasses from a waitress who walked by. “Thank YOU for showing up. You two look so lovely together!” She squeezed her hands together, “Please help yourself around, I’m sorry I gotta go to be a good hostess but I hope you enjoy! I’ll hunt you down again, I wanna hear everything about you too.” She gave a cheeky smile and a wink of an eye, and was gone faster than the words were able to leave your mouth.

You looked at the drink and just gave it to Jimin without having tasted it. He took it without saying a word, he cocked his head and watched you turn your back at him.

You haven’t seen the apartment before so you went ahead and took a look around when Jimin shook some hands near the entrance. It was spacious and had a gorgeous view to the city, directed towards the beautiful sunset and the border where the countryside began - where he grew up.

The designated place for the gifts was the kitchen island where you had the full view of. It was full from colourful boxes with varying sizes, what a shame that you didn’t get her anything. Anything the boxes were hiding you can’t afford even with the money you’ve been saving up.

The living room was full of life. People of many ages and from the same background showed up, you and Jimin were out of place here. You had nothing to your name. The person who was closest to your level of income was a multimillionaire. The money you and Jimin are able to make together in a month is the same as they make in an hour. You’re sure that Namjoon makes that even in a shorter amount of time and around the clock.

Speaking of the devil, Namjoon stood tall and sipped on his champagne when he saw you enter the room while chatting this and that with Seokjin. His lip pulled up into a smirk as you scanned the room with big and amazed eyes. He excused himself from Seokjin and made sure his vest was sitting well on him in a hope that he would be even more irresistible for you.

He didn’t make far when Jimin appeared from the corner and wrapped his arm around your waist, making Namjoon stop in his tracks. He was confused, looking like he froze next to the coffee table. Did your father fail once again? The deal was that he got you to leave Jimin for Namjoon.

“Oh lookie who is here,” Jimin whispered to your ear when his hand met your waist, the irritation in his voice was easy to catch.

Seokjin made his way from beside Namjoon, wearing a charming smile when he greeted you, ignoring the man who was standing like a statue in middle of the room, “You two are my absolute favorites.” He smiled like it was the most obvious thing in the world, ”I’ve heard alot about you and I admire the things you are willing to do for each other. That’s love at its finest.”

“Thank you sir.” Jimin responded when he finally registered what was being said to you two.

“You’re welcome,” Seokjin let his hand rest on Jimin’s shoulder and gave it a friendly squeeze, “Now excuse me, I’ve got to get back to my business partner who is having a stroke.” He laughed and then bowed to you.

“What’s going on?” Jimin picked his jaw up from the ground and asked you before leading you around the apartment. “Why are they being so nice to us? Aren’t they supposed to think we aren’t worthy of their company.”

You shrugged.

“Okay, that’s it.” He pushed you to the bathroom and closed the door behind him. “You’re so distant with me. You refused to drink the champagne that Jiwoo offered and won’t actively participate into conversations. Why are you so cold to me? You’ve been like this for few days.”

You looked at his shoes and pursed your lips, you had no intention on saying anything.

“C’mon. Tell me,” He crouched down to look you in the eye but fails at finding them, “What’s wrong? What’re you feeling?”

“Nothing. It’s just that...“ You got out and he nodded along your words to encourage you to speak. “You didn’t even try to contact me then and you seem awfully close with Suzie.” Now that you say the words out loud it sounds so stupid and childish. You couldn’t help how you’ve been feeling. It’s like for some reason mother nature wanted to punish you by sending unwanted hormones through you. This wasn’t logical in any sense.

“I wanted to call you but she said that it’s better if you can have space to think.” He explained.

He sounded reasonable but you couldn’t help what you were feeling. You’re entitled to your feelings even if they won’t make sense. “Maybe you want to be with her and not me.”

“Why do you feel that way? I’m not close to her at all.” His gaze bore into you but you would look at the wall rather than at him. ”How can I get it through your head that I love you and only you.” The frustration in his voice grew when you refused to look at him. ”I want to marry you. I’ve never thought about other woman than you.”

Jimin huffed when you stayed silent and disinterested and digged his hand into his pocket, pulling out a small velvet box. “You almost saw it when your dad barged in the house. This is what Suzie hid.” He opened the box, revealing a silver ring with a small diamond decorating it. “I know it’s been hard between us but it’ll get better. It’s a new situation for the both of us but it’s okay because we have each other.” He paused. ”That morning I wanted to tell you that I got a job from my former dance teacher Mr. Kahn. We met him at the farmers’ market.”

You traced your eyes along his suit to his eyes that were observing every little detail of your face. “After telling about my job I wanted to take you out to the lake to see the sunset. I wanted to tell you that you’re the most expensive thing in my life and I would do everything all over again if it meant I’d get to have you. I don’t want to lose you.”

When you averted your gaze to the ring, Jimin kneeled in front of and took your left hand in his, “I know this isn’t the most glamorous place to do this but I love you so much. I can’t promise to give you everything you need or deserve but I can promise that I will try my hardest. You’re my treasure I want to hold close to me the rest of our lives. I want to form my future with you. Will you help me make that dream come true?”

Jimin held the ring in the air, waiting for your response. He quickly grew nervous when you would just stare at it. “It’s your time to say something. Please say something.” He said and swallowed the lump out of his throat. His palm was sweating and heart racing faster by the second.

A tear fell on his hand and he was quick to look at you, tears of joy falling out and the big and beautiful smile on your face.

“I do.” You said and blinked the tears away. ”I do!”

Jimin wasted no time with pulling the ring on your finger and getting up to kiss you, swiping the tears with the pads of his thumbs.

“I’ve missed you.” You told him when he pulled away but you grabbed the back of his head to pull him in again to catch his soft lips in yours.

“I’ve missed you too.” He smiled and kissed you again, slowly getting deeper and deeper. Soon the kisses became more open and needy but he pulled away. “We better stop or I can’t go out there anymore. I’ve really been missing you if you can tell,” He chuckled, looking down at his crotch and you smirked,

“Don’t stop.”

“Are you sure?” You recognized the neediness in his voice, it trembled and came out whinier than usual.

You hummed and reached to cup him, giving it attentive care you felt his bulge grow bigger by your touch, “Yeah I’m sure. This isn’t the first time you’ve had sex in the bathroom.”

“In this one it is.” He admitted coyly and grabbed your hips to lift you up on the counter. “You’re the only one who makes me horny enough to fuck in a bathroom, any bathroom.” He grabbed your thighs to pull them apart, letting himself between them and attaching his lips to your neck.

“Oh, yeah?” For some reason you were flattered, no one has ever made him feel like you do. You played with his suit collars and he nodded,

“You make me so horny.”

”Show me.”

“You want me to show you how much I want to fuck you senseless?” He pulled the hem of your dress up and grabbed your ass to pull you close to him, you’re sure you’ll have marks from that the next day. “I’ll fuck you like the little slut you are. You’ll be screaming my name and have those other’s in jealousy.”

His hands were gripping your behind when he started grinding on you. You could feel your juices sticking on your panties as his bulge massaged you. It has been a while since you got him riled up.

He pulled away and you immediately missed his contact.

Jimin teased your legs, hovering his fingers over your inner thighs and running them over to your core, though he wouldn’t touch there just yet. You thought you’d go insane from his teasing until he allowed his forefinger touch you over the material of your underwear and run his finger up and down with little to no pressure.

He enjoyed the little reactions you got out of you. The little gasps and how your breathing pattern changed from moment to moment. He could do this forever, seeing you so vulnerable and needy, only from his touch, at least up to the point where his trousers started hurting him.

Jimin slithered his finger under your panties and his eyes were about to roll to the back of his head when he felt how wet you were, thinking of the pure euphoria he is getting to feel real soon.

Jimin didn’t hesitate to pull off your underwear and you helped him by lifting your buttocks in the air for a second. His fingers teased your entrance, warming you up for himself as he reached over to kiss you. You heard how fast his breathing was getting,

“Take off your pants.” You told him and he wasted no time in losing his belt and dropping the suit trousers on the floor along with his briefs, letting himself spring free. You helped your view get better by opening his buttons on his dress shirt, toned muscles and v-line right in your line of sight.

He gave your lips a light peck and rested his forehead on your shoulder to observe his hand give a few quick strokes along his length before guiding himself at your entrance. He shut his eyes tightly when he pushed himself in you, steadily but carefully. He sighed from relief and you expected him to move, but he didn’t, he stayed put and lifted his head up.

Jimin looked into your eyes and a smile set on his lips, eyes pulling back into half orbs, certainly something you weren’t expecting in a moment like this. “I love you,” He said with the grin growing bigger.

It was like Jimin was able to see through your soul but you didn’t mind it, you wanted him to. You were ready to share your life with this man. He made you more comfortable than you’ve ever felt before.

“I love you too,” You giggled at his silliness.

Jimin looked between your eyes and lips before setting his hand strongly behind your neck. He made you feel secure and cared for. He kissed you and started to roll his hips.

Jimin kept his kisses tender, just like the thrusts. You’re always mind boggled about this man’s power of making scenarios like these feel incredible romantic. Having him close to you is always so intimate, different from the times you’ve had with others.

Your fingers tugging onto his hair made him pick up the pace and the kisses evolved into sloppier ones but Jimin wouldn’t deepen them so you did. You let your tongue in his mouth which he took gladly, hands on the back of his head and neck, holding him close to you. You stroked your fingers in his hair and felt his smile on your lips when he moved his hands to caress your breasts.

Jimin set his hands on the counter and moved onto kissing your neck, having put more focus on his lower body connecting with yours.

His mouth didn’t muffle your moans and heavy breaths anymore, you let them echo around the room. It fueled him on. He wasn’t afraid of you hearing him either, his grunts came out on every thrust up until the door handle turned.

You snapped your head at it when the attempt of getting in was followed with a knock. Jimin however set his hand on your mouth and hardened his moves, he wasn’t going to stop.

He watched your expression while your moans resonated against his palm. He enjoyed the way your eyes twitched with satisfaction, he bit his lip and his pupils widened.

Jimin moved closer and placed his lips next to your ear, “I’d love to hear you moan for me. Maybe scream my name…” he whispered.

He knew what to say to you to make you melt under him. You’d want him to hear how good he made you feel.

He had a need to gratify you. You noticed it at the very beginning. He’d work his hardest to make you want him, to make you come for him.

Jimin traced his thumb around your clit, spreading your wetness allowing him to caress it with no friction, running his finger in an up and down motion. A bead of sweat rolled down his forehead when your moans became heavier and more frequent he pressed harder on your clit. The euphoric feeling finally passed through your body, making you clench around Jimin. He rode your orgasm for a few thrusts before cumming himself, shooting his load in you with a profound grunt. Both of your breaths filled the room as you tried to catch them.

He kept his movements smooth, making his best effort to ride your orgasm before cumming himself. He listened to your whines and felt you tremble around him, he couldn’t help it any longer.

He let out deep groan when he released himself into you, still pumping for a second before stopping and pulling out.

Jimin pressed his lips on your forehead and gave you a kiss before pulling up his trousers. He smoothed down the hem of your dress and hopped on the counter next to you, setting his arm around you while trying to calm down his breathing.

”What now?” You asked, fiddling around with the ring on your hand.

”Are you nervous for us?” Jimin read you like an open book, ”We can now get that loan you talked about. ”

”What do you mean? You said we can’t get one.” You stopped and turned to look at him.

”That’s before we get married. I’ve been to the bank to talk about it. We have enough money for a downpayment from my car and now I have a job at my old school and -”

”The dance academy?” Of course, how did that slip out of your mind. You’ve seen him dance and he confessed that he is a trained dancer as well, just that no one else has believed in him.

”Yup.”

You sighed and averted your gaze back to ring, ”Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

”Things got in the way but now everything is getting better. We’re getting married, I have a job. We can buy you a cozy little house where we’re raising our children.” Jimin set his hand over your tummy and you turned your head to look at him. ”Did you think I’d really miss all of the signs?” He laughed ”You’ve been throwing up every morning yet you insist you’re not ill. You won’t drink alcohol. And your breasts…” he deepened his voice and winked.

You smacked his arm with the back of your hand and huffed. He chuckled and took your hand in his, ”We have a lot to learn but we’ll make it.”

It never crossed your mind that you’d get to live a life you wanted. It was obvious to you that you were married off and did what you were told. You ended up going against your own morals when a man you had never seen before approached you but it bloomed into something beautiful. Life isn’t going to be easy from now on but the worst was left behind a while ago, the best part of it is getting to share it with Jimin. The pieces are slowly falling together.

A/n: Thank you for reading, remember to drop a like and reblog. Tell me your thoughts on this series, it’ll help me better the content im delivering.

[rogerrachel1995]

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[analphancones]

Behind Closed Doors: Chapter Three

Summary: More stories of how the two came to be

————————————–

After that night, a lengthy debate followed between the two a few days later. Dan was easy to hurt, emotionally fragile and Phil was a man who didn’t believe in cheating, a man who regretted what he had done. Well, he claimed to regret it. He didn’t really, not like he said he did. He wished it hadn’t happened in the sense that his conscience would be clear. On the other hand, he was glad it happened. Days of his wife working late and leaving him sexually frustrated were finally solved in a very unexpected way. Dan could be the perfect outlet, the perfect fuck toy if trained properly. While he loved the idea, got off to it regularly and knew he could get away with it, he still felt uneasy about the whole ordeal.

The day after they didn’t speak much. Every time Phil came anywhere near the teen he would turn bright red and turn away from the older male. Dan didn’t mean to be so shy, he really only was because he showed someone his most vulnerable side and didn’t know how he would react to it when not intoxicated. He was hoping Phil would be calm, collected. Sadly, he didn’t get his way.

“How’d you sleep?” Dan asked, sitting up on the counter while Phil made coffee. It took a lot of courage to speak to him, still blushing like a bride in winter.

“Alright.” Phil said shortly, shrugging and facing away from Dan.

“I had an odd dream.” Dan rambled mindlessly, figuring if Phil wasn’t going to be talkative he would fill the silence with his thoughts. “I didn’t get to finish it though. I woke up when mum came home. Can you hear her snoring?” He giggled softly, seeing Phil tense up at the mention of his mother.

“Yeah..keep your voice down.” Phil said a bit more harshly than intended, looking over at him sternly. “Do not let her find out about what happened last night. She can absolutely never know. Understood?”

“Well duh.” Dan pouted softly, pushing his hair back. “Do you regret it?” He asked softly, biting his lip as he normally did when nervous.

“Of course I regret it!” Phil snapped softly, letting out a sigh and trying to calm his words down. “It was a mistake Dan.”

“So..you don’t want me?” He asked softly, his hopes dropping. “Last night you made it pretty clear you were sexually attracted to me. It’s not like she’d ever have to know..I wouldn’t tell if you wouldn’t.” He tried to coax him. Phil shook his head.

“Dan it was a moment of weakness. I hadn’t gotten off properly in a while, you looked really really good. Your innocence was hot to me when I was drunk and horny but now I see it needs to be preserved. Not to mention the fact that this is illegal. I’m 32. Do you really think it’s a good idea for me to start sleeping with a teenager. Not to mention-” Dan cut him off, getting down and pushing him back against the counter slowly.

“I don’t think you’re understanding my words. I want you to take my innocence. Any shred of it left, I want you to have.” He bit his lip. He didn’t know if what he was saying was weird or hot. “Legality isn’t a factor if no one ever knows. I know I won’t tell anybody..” He said softly, leaning in and nipping his earlobe gently. “And as long as you don’t either, you can have me anytime you want me. Since you seem to be more and more sexually frustrated by the day. I know you love her. So stay for her love. And come to me for the part you’re not getting.” Phil took a steady and deep breath, his hands moving to Dan’s hips gently.

“No one will ever know?”

“Our little secret. I promise.” He grinned, leaning forward and kissing him softly. Lips molded against lips, tongues exploring one another’s mouths with a sense of familiarity they hadn’t noticed before.

From that day forward the two began their secret affair. Even as they unpacked the last few boxes to their new house, Lily thinking she finally had a family, the only thought on her husband’s mind was I can’t wait for her to leave tonight.

Lily didn’t get called into work that night though, which meant Dan was lonely and Phil was frustrated. They both kept these feelings to themselves of course, not showing them to anyone but each other. Stealing kisses here and there, each time Phil would pass by his young lover he’d grope his ass with possessiveness and want.

The house wasn’t too far away from where they were previously located. Obviously not as this would hinder Phil and Lily’s careers as well as Dan’s education and social life. Dan had only made one really, really good friend at school. Sadly, as much as he wished he could share his fondness of Phil Lester with somebody, he had to keep it to himself. So when his only friend showed up to walk with him to school the next morning, taking notice to Dan’s deteriorated mood, hated that he couldn’t answer honestly.

“You look like a big bag of sad.” She smiled, chuckling. The one and only friend Dan had managed to keep around was a short red headed girl with a southern accent that came and went, an angry and adorable girl named Stacy Casey. Everyone called her Peach though.

“Well, I am a big bag of sad.” Dan chuckled, slinging his bag over his shoulder and walking with her. “I have no reason to be either.” It was true, one night was nothing compared to how long they’ve had to wait for their secret get togethers in the past months. He just felt so unstable he needed the contact.

“Wanna talk about it champ?” She smiled, elbowing him in the side gently. ‘You got that look on your face I get when Brian is getting flirted with by other girls. You got some romance issues?” She raised an eyebrow. Dan shook his head dismissively.

“No. I’m just a little out of whack. Is this what girls go through when they’re on their period?”

“Are you irrational, angry, jealous, and easy to make cry right now?” She asked and Dan nodded slowly. “Then yeah. Welcome to the world of menstruation Danny.” She laughed. “What girl is it that has one of my best friends in such a rut?”

“Well..see we’re more like fuck buddies I guess. And h-she has been busy, so I’m just kind of sexually frustrated and something about the way my emotions are right now it’s just not sitting right. It’s dumb dude.” Dan chuckled.

“It’s sounds to me like you’re falling in love with this girl. When do I get to meet her?” She grinned, looking up at him from her 4’11 stance. He was short for a guy himself, but still stood a foot taller than her.

“Not happening Peach.” He chuckled. “No one can know I’m with her. I’m keeping my private life private.”

“Man that’s no fun.” She scoffed. “I’m dating a drug dealer and you know this but I can’t know the girl you’re screwing?” She asked as they pushed past the doors to get into school, the bell ringing.

“Maybe someday.” Dan grinned.

After classes all ended Peach wound up running off with Brian, her boyfriend and love of her life. Dan walked home in silence, music playing on his headphones. It was nice out, beautiful weather. He used to get upset over the fact that he had to walk to and from school, but on nice days like this he was thankful. Gave him time to think. Was he really falling in love with Phil Lester? Sure, he adored their time together, he cherished every kiss, every touch, the way Phil’s thumb stroked his hand when they held hands.

Phil was always so careful with him too. They had been doing this for a few months, whatever this thing was. Yet they had never actually had sex. Phil had fingered him, fucked him senseless with a couple digits until he was screaming and seeing stars. He had eaten him out, tongue fucking the most sensitive part of the teenagers whole body until he was coming over and over again from his tongue until he couldn’t anymore. Phil had mouth fucked him instructed him on how to give the perfect blow job, even used vibrators and such on him. And yet had never fucked him, not properly, not yet.Each time Dan asked why he would never properly fuck him it led to an argument of sorts, or well, Dan pouting and getting insecure and Phil having to reassure him it was all for good reason.

“Do you not want me?” Dan asked one night. A sheet was laid over his lower body, him on his stomach. Phil laid next to him and laced their fingers together, shaking his head and kissing his knuckles.

“I want you. More and more every time we do this. It would be so easy to. Every since time we even kiss I imagine how good you would feel around me. But I wanna save it. Your last shred of sexual innocence. I’m saving it.”

“Why?” Dan asked softly, looking up at him.

“Because I know I’m the only person you would give it too. You’re barely 15. No one else has piqued your interest enough for you to even think of giving them that side of you. It’s all reserved for me. Me and me only. I wanna save it until I can make it special for you. I don’t want to cheapen your virginity by taking it on a couch, or in the shower, or in the kitchen while your mum sleeps. I want it to be special. You deserve that.”

Dan wanted to argue, to say he didn’t care where or how he lost it as long as it was to him. But the way Phil spoke made him so admirable. Any other man would have taken it long ago, not bothering to teach a virgin how to suck you off or stretch him or bring him ultimate sexual bliss. Phil wasn’t here just for the sex, he was here for Dan. He was here for sex with Dan. There was friction, a tension between the two. An unspoken thing, as Dan called it in his head.

Once Dan got home from school he noticed the car in the driveway was gone. A grin spread across his face as he realized his mum was at work. He walked in, tossing down his bag and kicking off his shoes, jogging up the steps. He wasn’t one to exercise, he hated running, but he was so eager for this, he had been craving it all night, ever since the moment 24 hours ago he found out he wouldn’t be getting it that night.

Phil was at his desk chair, yawning and stretching out his back as he finished up some editing. Dan always thought his job was so cool, he got to edit films and such for people for a price. It was like the dream job. Never having to leave the house to work, good money, pretty simple work. Dan snuck up from behind slowly, doing the cliche ‘wrapping your arms around your lover from behind’ move, smiling brightly. Phil chuckled, looking up at him and pecking his lips.

“Hello sweet. How was school?” He asked, spinning around to face Dan.

“Boring.” Dan shrugged, moving into Phil’s lap while he was still sat in the office chair, leaned back a bit now. “All I could think about today was you.” And whether or not I’m in love with you.

“Likewise.” Phil smirked, moving his hands to the small of Dan’s back, pushing up his shirt slightly, tracing small patterns against his skin. “Have I told you how beautiful you are yet today?”

“No.” Dan blushed softly, smiling. When they were alone Phil often acted as if they were a couple, rather than what they really were. Dan enjoyed it enough, he liked to pretend.

“Well, you are. So pretty baby.” He hummed, leaning forward and pressing gentle kisses along Dan’s neck and jawline, a gentle moan escaping his lips. As soon as he felt teeth dragging down his throat Dan knew he was in for a good night. Even though he wouldn’t get fucked, he’d be with the man he loved. And the next day, he’d be with a whole new set of emotions.

[remembertae]

Murphy Brown “Uh-Oh” Part 1 - 3

(Photo: CBS)

S3 E26 May 20, 1991 / S4 E1-2 Sep. 16, 1991

WRITTEN BY: Diane English & Korby Siamis

SYNOPSIS

42-year-old national news anchor Murphy Brown is shocked when radical activist ex-husband Jake shows up at her Washington D.C. office. After spending decades abroad, Jake has returned to D.C. so he can work within the political system. He wants to settle down and remarry Murphy. She and Jake spend a romantic week together, during which he proposes several times. Just when she’s about to accept his latest offer, Murphy’s ex-boyfriend Jerry shows up at her door, also looking to rekindle their past affair. Murphy struggles to choose between the two men over the next several days, all while complaining of an incessant headache. One day she accidentally invites both guys to lunch. When she gets fed up with their quibbling, she abruptly leaves the restaurant. Later at home, Murphy examines a home pregnancy test and looks extremely stressed out.

When Murphy next appears at work wearing goofy slippers and a frazzled expression, her coworkers worry. Best friend Frank confronts her privately and she reveals she’s pregnant. He panics and doesn’t know what advice to give. Murphy recognizes this might be her only chance to have a baby. But she wonders how it would impact her career or if she would lose her journalistic edge. She tells Frank, “I know I have the right to make this decision. I just didn’t expect it to be this hard.” Hoping the first pregnancy test was a fluke, Murphy heads to the pharmacy to purchase more test kits. Unfortunately, she runs into boss Miles, who spots the kits in her shopping basket. He immediately melts down, wondering how an unmarried pregnant anchor woman could survive on primetime news. Murphy tells Miles she’ll let him know the results in the morning. Later at home, we see all her tests have come back positive.

Jake returns to Murphy’s place that night. She tells him she’s pregnant with his child and not sure what to do. He assumed she’d called him over to refuse his marriage proposal and admits he was a bit relieved by that prospect; turns out Jake isn’t really cut out for D.C. He wonders if they could make a family work, but she can tell neither of them have changed and they’d face the same marital woes they encountered before. Murphy wonders aloud if she could raise a child alone, which makes Jake laugh. She becomes defensive, and though she hasn’t made a decision, Jake can sense she’s seriously considering having the baby. He affirms that the choice is hers but admits he can’t be there as a father. Murphy says she understands. Jake thanks her and leaves.

The next day at work, Murphy tells the news team she’s pregnant with Jake’s baby but that he’s left the country. Corky offers to escort her to a doctor who will “take care of things”, but Murphy says she’s decided to have the baby and raise it alone. Again, all of the men panic.

Out at lunch, Murphy confides her situation to restaurateur/father of eight Phil, who tells her she has a tough journey ahead but that she’ll be alright. When Jerry shows up to meet her, he doesn’t believe her pregnancy news at first. As she suspected, he’s no longer interested in getting back together now that there’s a baby in the picture. But he offers to help her out however he can as a friend, which cheers her up.

Murphy later goes home to find housepainter Eldin (who’s been working on her place for three years) packing up to leave for good. He assumes she’s chosen either Jake or Jerry, and he doesn’t want to be in the way when her new man moves in. Murphy reveals that the only new addition to the home will be a baby, to which Eldin reacts with unmitigated joy and hugs. Pleased that he’s actually happy for her, Murphy asks Eldin, “Do you think I’ll make a good mother?” He replies, “No, but I will,” and gets to work painting the nursery.

KEEPING IT REAL QUOTIENT

I loved this program when I was a teenager* and probably watched these episodes when they first aired, but I had no recollection of Murphy ever contemplating abortion. This story arc is more memorable for what happened after she gave birth to son Avery at the end of season 4, when U.S. Vice President Dan Quayle famously took her character to task for, “mocking the importance of fathers by bearing a child alone.” In the season 5 premier episode, audio from Quayle’s speech was used in the show to make it appear as if the Vice President were targeting a national news journalist as opposed to a sitcom character. All this real life debate about conservative “family values” vs. a more liberal concept of what makes a family – not to mention the meta goodness of incorporating Quayle’s comments in the storyline – completely overshadowed any memory I had of Murphy seriously considering termination at the outset.

But what I love most about the beginning of this pregnancy arc is that abortion is treated as the obvious choice for her character. The assumption is subtle, so subtle you kind of have to look for it. It’s implied in her initial conversation with Frank, who frenetically tells her, “I think you should definitely not have this baby… No, have it… Have it, but look into adoption. Is any of this helping you?” Though no one ever utters the word “abortion” during this three-part episode, there’s no doubt what a phrase like “definitely should not have this baby” means. There’s also that moment when Corky says she’ll take Murphy to a “back alley” doctor for the procedure, leading to the episode’s most pointed joke -

Murphy: Corky, there is no back alley. Women in this country legally have a choice. At least I think they still do, I haven’t checked the paper today.

Corky: I’m sorry. I’m from Louisiana.

I found that joke a bit corny (also sad, as it is now more relevant than ever). Perhaps at the end of the Reagan/GHW Bush years, a TV character vaguely stating “women legally have a choice” with regard to her own unplanned pregnancy seemed more bold than stilted, but it falls pretty flat now.

But Murphy herself isn’t flat. She’s a wonderfully complex character, which is what makes her set of choices so complicated and interesting. Before she knows she’s pregnant, she already has a tough choice deciding between a leftist guy who’s romantic, dedicated and aligned with her politics (Jake), and a funny conservative guy who challenges her while also offering the less-daunting prospect of a non-marital relationship (Jerry). After she learns of her pregnancy, there’s this great dream sequence in which she walks down a hallway, peering behind different doors. Behind one she sees Jake, behind another is Jerry. Behind the third door is a nursery full of babies; Murphy’s grimace in response to that sight is probably the funniest moment in the whole story. As she admits to both Frank and Jake, she really doesn’t have any maternal instincts yet. For her to fear what the onset of those instincts might do to her career makes so much sense for her character. This is a staunchly independent woman who clearly never intended to breed.

The way the men in her life react to her situation creates more pressure in a way that’s both very maddening and very believable. The guys at work make her pregnancy all about themselves and their sense of panic. It isn’t fair that her very personal decision should have so much impact on their careers, but realistically, it would. (Can you imagine how conservative politicians and TV viewers in the early 1990s would react to a real-life unmarried newswoman getting knocked up?) It would be best for her mostly-male coworkers if Murphy quietly aborted her fetus and everything went back to normal. Choosing abortion would also improve her chances with both Jake and Jerry, neither of whom want anything to do with a baby.

But seeing how all these dudes disappoint Murphy just makes her change of heart more believable. The “last chance for a baby” trope already rings true to me in most cases, even for a character as unsentimental Murphy. You also get the sense that she really doesn’t want to grow old alone, hence her entertaining Jake’s marriage proposal even though marriage scares her. So instead of choosing to be in a long-term relationship with either of these inconsistent romantic partners, she chooses a child. Given who she is and what she desires, her choosing motherhood over abortion ultimately makes sense to me.

GRADE

B+ I love this episode for clearly demonstrating that parenting is a way more complicated and fraught long-term decision than termination, especially for single women. I think the writers could have been clearer about abortion being one of her options. The choice to abort is implied, never explicitly examined. But neither is it stigmatized. I appreciate that.

*The Monday night Murphy Brown/Designing Women comedy block on CBS had a big impact on my budding feminist worldview

- by Tara

[phaylenfairchild]

The Ongoing Problem With Trans Representation in Media

The Crying Game

In 1992, as a budding Transgirl who hadn’t yet heard the word “Transgender” nor knew anything about gender or sexuality, I watched an film by Neil Jordan called “The Crying Game.” It was dubbed “The Most Shocking Film Of The Year” by entertainment magazines. At the time, I had an insatiable longing for people I could relate to on film, and often had to substitute women as figures of my future intent; I wanted Richard Gere to sweep me away like he had Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman. I wants to slither around like Catwoman, with that brilliant confidence that was the perfect mix of bad ass girl power and unapologetic confidence. She was my revenge idol. I wanted to flip-flop, cartwheel and yoga pose into school and kick the shit out of my bullies while making them all love me at the same time.

But the Character of Dil in “The Crying Game” was most accurate to who I knew I was becoming. This androgynous, beautiful woman captivated me. Dil was the lover of a soldier, Jody, played by the incredible Forest Whittaker, a man held prisoner by the IRA who pleads with a fellow solider and friend, Fergus, to protect Dil. She unwittingly becomes the subject of both fascination and affection of Fergus.

Through the course of the film, the two fall in love, and when it comes to the pivotal moment where the characters start becoming intimate- it takes a dark turn.

As Fergus begins to disrobe Dil in the bedroom of her bedroom, he gets on his knees, expecting to find female genitalia and instead reveals a penis.

Yes, right there. A penis. And if you saw it in the cinema, a 12 foot tall image of a penis. On a woman. Fergus twisted away in disgust and proceeds to vomit immediately. Then, he hits her.

I remember being horrified- my breathe caught in my throat- not because she had a penis, but because he acted with such sudden and unexpected repulsion over someone he was just kissing and intending to bed.

The film was marketed on the Trans “Surprise.” Studios launched campaigns for audiences not to give away the ending.

In the afterglow of The Crying Game, Transphobic rhetoric became more aggressive than ever in cinema. Who can forget Ace Ventura, played by Jim Carey, belllowing “Einhorn is a man?!” in reference to the character played by Sean Young, and then heaving into the toilet at the very notion an attractive woman might not have a vagina.

Transwomen were reduced to bawdy, comedic or grotesque twists by lazy writers in Hollywood. The go-to joke. The trend continued throughout the 90’s and well into the 2000’s. With what little Trans characters there were on screen, they were always the subject of comedy or villainy. Because, for some reason, it’s still an outrageous knee-slapper to see a sexy woman you suddenly discover has male genitalia or much easier to hate her, so they make her the freakish bad guy, such as in Sleepaway Camp, like some dangerous modern day Frankenstein who will curl their hair, twirl their penis then sit your throat.

More recently, the Trans representation in film has changed in context- with sweeping period dramas like “The Danish Girl” — which won an Oscar for the cisgender actor, Eddie Redmayne, playing the role of a Trans woman. Or, the “Dallas Buyers Club” — which won an Oscar for the cisgender actor, Jared Leto, playing the role of a Trans woman. However, the year that Redmayne won his Oscar for putting on a dress and pretending to be Trans, a film that had been far better received critically, Tangerine, which featured two actual Transwomen played by Transwomen, was snubbed, despite receiving nominations or awards by every other organization the entire awards season. The Academy demonstrated they’d rather give an award to a man tepidly playing a Transwoman, than a Transwoman giving an incredible performance.

Of course, those Transwomen were playing sex workers. I have it on good authority from my Trans identifying actress friends that it’s almost impossible to get roles for anything else. “All I get offers for are prostitutes,” one accomplished actress told me. “If we want access to work we either have to be a prostitute, a mistress, a self-hating trans person, dead or dying of AIDS, or willing to be ridiculed for comedic value. That’s where we are. In 2018.”

But, some will argue the merits of “Transparent,” The Amazon series that features a middle aged man, portrayed by Jeffery Tambor, who transitions from male to female later in life. It is the first television show to take viewers on that journey, one which details the experiences of those in the orbit of the transitioning main character, including her children and ex wife, without exploiting it as sensationalist. “Transparent” features a plethora of Trans identifying artists, both in front of the camera and behind it. While the primary stars are all cisgender performers, Alexandra Billings, Trace Lysette and the iconic Candis Cayne are all series regulars. Zackary Drucker and Our Lady J feature as producers. It appears to be our staple; our one single thing we’re allowed. Unfortunately, although heavily awarded, it’s not got very broad appeal. It’s a series by Transgender people, about Transgender people… so mainstream remains a little stand-offish. It’s “That Transgender show.”

That’s not surprising. We Trans people working in media have to pave our own way, create our own projects, self produce them, star in them. If we try to intermingle cisgender society within our works, we’re typically turned away. As a writer, I’ve had my screenplays turned down by many companies exclusively because, despite having a cisgender lead, it has a trans character. In a fantasy film I wrote which was a finalist in Outfest International’s Screenplay competition, the response I received from interested production companies wanted me to turn the Trans girl into a “traditional” girl. Every film I write has a Trans character, not just because I’m politically advocating the normalizing of Trans people in everyday society, but because I refuse to create worlds in which we do not exist simply for the comfort of mainstream audiences. “Why does she need to be Trans?” An agent once asked me.

“Why not?” I answered.

Orange is the New Black was lauded for it’s inclusion of a Trans character, played by a Transgender woman, Laverne Cox. Because gender diverse characters in media are so rare, it catapulted her well beyond the boundaries of performance into the realm of social activism. That same attention and expectation destroyed Caitlyn Jenner who was no longer just allowed to be the tabloid mainstay by proxy of the Kardashians, but now had to be our fearless leader, our ambassador to cigender tribes. There are about five Trans figures that cisgender audiences can name: Caitlyn Jenner being the most notable along with Cox on a lesser scale. Others paying attention know that the Wachowskis, directors of the successful Matrix franchise both transitioned and Jazz Jennings, the teenager with her own reality show on that channel that also shows My 600 lb Life and Sister Wives. Cis people don’t know Janet Mock, although her work is invaluable, but they heard a Transgirl took on Rose McGowan at a book signing. Our names cross their facebook feeds when the news reports our deaths. Beyond that, we’re people not allowed to use bathrooms in certain states, a word that is banned by the CDC, and reduced to that one Transgender person who did something that one time which the media loves to exploit for a headline in a fleeting story. Especially when it’s salacious. When former Playboy Playmate, Kendra Wilkinson’s basketball star husband, Hank Baskett, had an alleged affair with a woman, the media latched on like a thirsty tick to the ass-end of a fat dog because that his mistress was Transgender. Of course, despite evidence, he denied it, and the couple leveraged the scandal to maximize ratings and profits by following the controversy on their reality show. They even starred in their own one-hour special to discuss it. Similarly, the media pounced at the opportunity to reveal the alleged affair that Jennifer Lopez’s then boyfriend, Casper Smart, was having with a Transwoman he met on Instagram. Then there was the story of Michael Phelps, the olympic gold medalist who had an ongoing, but secret relationship with an intersex woman- one which he never denied, but ignored instead. In every case, the transwoman is vilified by the media, like some sexual predator; A succubus who cast a spell of seduction on innocent men. That’s when the media pays attention.

That’s problematic. The fact that mainstream society possesses more general awareness of cis actors who play Trans characters, or random Transwomen involved in scandals does nothing to improve our actual visibility, or integrate us into mainstream culture. It alienates us further onto the fringes of society.

We’re like the unicorns of media. When one of us pops up and garners any attention for something other than simply being Trans or scandalous, people react with; “Wow, you really do exist.”

Far and few are the opportunities for Trans actors and actresses, filmmakers and film writers. It’s not because there are too few of us, it’s because when Hollywood looks at us, they don’t see our potential, they see a political cause. An embattled, marginalized person. When we disclose our trans status to people, they suddenly lose sight of our face and instead see the last anti-trans headline they read splashed across out forehead- and maybe they feel sad. Maybe they feel that if they’re uncomfortable or distracted exclusively by the fact that we’re trans, moviegoers, television viewers and the greater cisgender community will be too.

Perhaps this is why we haven’t really seen a transgender performer portray a non-trans role- unless you count Candis Cayne playing a fairytale creature in The Magicians. Cayne is such a brilliant performer she could play anything. She’s stunning, she’s captivating onscreen, she’s a staggeringly talented actress…

But apparently, despite the multitude of cisgender actors playing trans in media, she isn’t allowed to play a ciswoman… just trans, and maybe a unicorn.

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[njawaidofficial]

'GLOW' Abortion Episode: Alison Brie, Betty Gilpin, Marc Maron on Realistic Portrayal

http://styleveryday.com/2017/07/03/glow-abortion-episode-alison-brie-betty-gilpin-marc-maron-on-realistic-portrayal/

'GLOW' Abortion Episode: Alison Brie, Betty Gilpin, Marc Maron on Realistic Portrayal

[Warning: This story contains spoilers from the entire first season of Netflix’s GLOW.]

In 2017, it’s still not common to see abortion normalized on TV. Add to that the fact that GLOW is set in 1985, and it seems the Netflix series might just be ahead of its time.

The female wrestling series took a break from the drama it had been following inside the ring to wrap up a personal arc that had also been brewing with Alison Brie’s leading character, Ruth Wilder, since the first episode. Ruth had a brief affair with her best friend’s (Betty Gilpin) husband and in the eighth episode (“Maybe It’s All the Disco”), after she had ended the relationship and the now-exposed secret still threatened the friendship at the center of the show, Ruth realizes that she might be pregnant.

The pregnancy test scene, set to Queen’s “Under Pressure,” sees Ruth pacing, trimming her bangs and cleaning her dirty hotel bathroom while anxiously waiting for the results of the prolonged ’80s home test. But the result is clear: She’s pregnant with her best friend’s husband’s baby.

After a quiet moment of reflection, Ruth’s next move is a thoughtful yet easy one. She decides to have an abortion. Ruth goes to the clinic, driven by wrestling coach-director Sam Sylvia (Marc Maron), and when he offers to stay, he asks without judgment if this is really what she wants.

“Yea,” she answers. “It’s not the right time. Not the right baby.”

The episode ends with Ruth lying legs spread on the table, being asked similar questions by the doctor and answering just as surely. During the procedure, she focuses on the one ceiling tile directly above her that is painted like the bright blue sky.

From there, the topic is never brought up again.

“It made so much sense to me when I read the script,” Brie now tells The Hollywood Reporter of her character’s matter-of-fact and non-emotional choice. “I responded to it immediately. That’s how I would react if I were Ruth, and I didn’t question it at all.”

The episode came near the end of Ruth’s phoenix-like season-one journey. She officially rises from the ashes in the 10th and final episode when she and her fellow wrestlers film the pilot for the show that will go on to become the first-ever female wrestling TV series.

GLOW co-creators Liz Flahvie and Carly Mensch — whose collective past writing credits include Orange Is the New Black, Nurse Jackie and Weeds — said Ruth’s decision wasn’t a brave one. Instead, it was realistic.

“We didn’t have some macro-intention to expose this somewhere in the season, it just organically came up,” Mensch explained to THR of letting Ruth’s actions write the story. “We did have a lot of heated discussion in the writers room about whether we wanted to show the abortion. If we were telling honest stories about things that women go through, whether it be in the ‘80s or now, a bunch of us felt that was a very relatable and normal story for certain types of women and that we shouldn’t shy away from showing that if it’s an actual, real experience.”

The storyline, airing during the current political climate, holds extra weight. While viewers are bingeing the series, a Senate health care plan threatens Planned Parenthood funding and abortion and women’s rights.

“It’s really important, especially right now, to highlight that women should be able to make that choice and that it doesn’t have to be the end of the world,” says Brie. “What I especially love about that episode is that it’s a very easy choice for Ruth to make, whether or not the emotional repercussions will continue throughout her life. They might or they might not. This is a show about women’s bodies and about them taking control of their own bodies, and that’s highlighted beautifully in that episode.”

The episode also serves as a bonding one for Ruth and Sam, who up until then had often sparred over Sam’s authority and Ruth’s actress-y attitude. Though Sam drove her to the clinic, she didn’t expect him to stay. When Ruth checks in at the clinic, the woman on staff assumes Sam is Ruth’s boyfriend. Sam says he is her husband without skipping a beat. “It just wasn’t the right time for us. I could have pulled out, but I just got lazy. Lucky for us, we hate children,” he says, a sweet gesture of support.

Months after filming the scene, Maron said he still gets choked up over the moment.

“That episode is emotionally heavy, but it’s played very straightforward,” he tells THR. “That is when the connection and relationship between the two of them changes. We could both feel the weight of it, just from my character showing up for her like that. That definitely sealed the deal.”

Even heavier now is the fact that these two broken friends, Ruth and Debbie Egan (Gilpin), have another secret between them. But even though their friendship is still fractured when the series ends, Gilpin doesn’t view the abortion secret as a threat.

“Ruth had sex with him. It’s not her fault that she got pregnant,” the actress tells THR. “Liz and Carly intentionally wanted to treat the pregnancy and abortion with a lighter touch. There wasn’t dramatic, crazy, sobbing scene. It is one of the many, many things that women deal with in the privacy of their own homes that we have to stop pretending doesn’t happen every single day.”

Both Brie and Gilpin, however, admit that the salaciousness of it all could add to soap opera-like storylines their rival wrestling characters could act out in the ring, if the show gets picked up for a second season.

“I think it would be a total disaster if it got out — it terrifies me!” Brie says. “But I sort of forget about it because the show doesn’t overdramatize or harp on it for too long. No one is talking about it. We don’t hear about it again for the rest of the season, and that’s really refreshing.”

Where the heaviness of the secret instead comes from, says the actress, is the internal conflict it creates for Ruth.

“Ruth has no doubt about the fact that she wants to get this abortion, but it’s really a moment for her to step back and take a look again at this thing that she did and where her life is and who she is,” Brie says of her struggling character. “It’s a really disgusting feeling of, ‘This is why I’m in this position.’ And that’s what’s upsetting to her.”

She adds, “In the ninth episode, there is a moment between Ruth and Debbie when they first start to speak to each other in an intimate way for the first time since the pilot, and they can’t quite do it. They’re not quite ready, and I think part of that does have to do with Ruth knowing about the full extent of the repercussions of her bad behavior.”

What did you think of the episode? Share your thoughts with THR below and head here for full coverage of GLOW, which is streaming now on Netflix.

GLOW

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