#maybe we are not so cooked after all
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when the slowburn makes the ship extra cute~~~
#kimikawaii this week for sure!!!!!! (has been saying that since july)#ik the nghy payoff will be âšsweetâš but itâs kinda funny how hw are slowburning nagisaâs role in the series as a whole#mans has a grand total of 3 songs to date and only 1 has a cv ver#place your bets what do you think will come first? nghy duet or ariken duet#t h o u g h. ariken is also kind of a slowburn but we all knew theyâd get together since ijiwaru release (shoutout to the og miku ver)#some say that ariken is still not canon in the novels to this very day#canât believe we got arisaâs future career aspirations reveal before ariken canon in the novels smh#but i digress!!!!!!!!!!!! nagisa needs more action and attention!!!!!!#he did have kind of a âthe bus came backâ moment with the izumo collab but we never saw his face again after that#(full cast merch doesnt count bc p. much everyoneâs included in them except for the school nurse and kako)#so. all im saying is: slowburn nghy by all means. just dont slowburn nagisaâs character arc aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#now that mona mania has cooled off (to a degree) and chizusweep has mellowed out (somewhat) itâs shiranamiâs time to shine!!!!!!!!#y. yeah. ik itâs harder to market him bc heâs a literal average (albeit handsome) joe but thatâs part of his charm!!!!!#i mean!!!!! he can cook!!!!! he stans ft4!!!!! heâs devoted to the girl he loves!!!!!! heâs a dreamboat!!!! what more could you ask for?#but. i do have to say that nghy developments have been kinda awkwardly handled as a whole⊠esp with heroine ikusei#i think nagisa shouldâve been introduced in heroiku or something⊠since he was planned from the start of hiyoriâs developmentâŠ#maybe they were trying to pull a â2nd love winsâ kinda parallel with kthn? but the ascana retcon made everything awkward huhâŠ#i think it couldâve worked out in the mv-verse. like if theyâd placed heroika+sukiuso after the fight+make up in herotaru#so the timeline would go smoothly from heroiku -> herotaru -> heroika#with hiyo realising that sheâd be better off focusing on work and track after the asuka debacle + chizu fight#like a âforget romance!!! i gotta work hard and run hard!!! omg wait nagisa wdym you love me???â kinda thing#but the [redacted] anime p much cut + pasted the asuka arc with the nagisa visit and. hm.#is this just an excuse to blame the clumsy handling of the nghy arc on the [redacted] anime? m⊠maybeâŠ?#but it all still couldâve kinda worked out if theyâd shifted the timelines around a little. yâknow. since sukiuso mv has nagisa visit in oct#idk i think having hiyo learn how to doll herself up from lxl for her first crush (asuka)#and then using what she learned to yassify herself to meet up with nagisa wouldâve been neater?#like a âhey look nagisa :) i applied what i learned from my pals :)â kinda thing#or maybe chizu and juri couldâve helped her with the nagisa dressup scene post-herotaru fight⊠but i digress!!!!!!#hmmmmmmmmmm⊠well. this has gone way off topic⊠anyways nghy canon and cute thatâs all byeeee#the dude from gamushara
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I often struggle to work seriously on a new project without having my previous project closed out by an external force, but now that space archive is officially moving out of my hands, maybe I will get back to the short story I was picking at dealing with the crude monsters theme, specifically 'woman does necromancy on her dead boyfriend by putting him in a pressure cooker, as narrated by a Greek chorus of horrible coworkers because I've been reading way too much Ask a Manager'
#the thought process here was:#ok ghosts as fossil fuels. what if it takes that long geologically for ghosts to happen#so we don't have humans yet. they're not done cooking#maybe some early hominids#but could you speedrun that by paying one of those companies who squash your dead loved one into a diamond#toxic dependence on a significant other likened to our toxic dependence on fossil fuels#some people's inability to imagine a life single#as so many people's inability to imagine a life without petroleum products#we seal our romantic promises with a chunk of carbon after all
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whenever people asked how i liked my 4-(ten hour)-day work week, i would always say i truly couldn't decide which was better because the 3 day weekends are really nice but ten hour days suck so so much, but i've been working 5 normal days starting at 9 for a few weeks to cover for my coworker's leave and. maybe this is it. my ideal schedule.
#i've never had a job that started at 9#before we changed our hours i had worked 8 to 4:30 so i was using that as my comparison#but the thing is i truly need so much sleep#i thought it would suck to still get home at 6#but i only need one more hour of sleep. which leaves me two more hours in the morning for minor chores and meal prep#which i used to have to do ALL after work after a TEN hour day#but like i'll have to cook tonight. but everything is chopped and ready to toss in a pan#going back to ten hours is starting to feel a little nightmarish#but i might have to for the rest of the year at least because of how holiday time was calculated#but maybe next year......hmmm#sorry for random personal post idk where to ramble
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#hot take that doesnt feel that 'hot' if ur kid is going thru one of the most traumatic experiences of their lives#and having to do it TOTALLY alone despite it not at all being a one person job#but thats just circumstance and how the cookie crumbled#and then you offer to come pick them up and drive them home for a week of help and relaxation once the experience is over since that's#all you can offer at the time#its. kinda a fucked up move to then back out when the time comes for said promised r&r#esp when u dont seem to understand [or maybe worse yet you Do but don't care] that ur child CLUNG to and FANTASIZED abt the relief that was#on the horizon for WEEKS of HELL. like 'just a little longer and then I will finally have some help.'#'just a little longer and then I can rest'#'just a few more days and then I can lay low and recoup some expenses and have meals I don't have to solely cook whilst also rehabbing a#sick dog and trying to maintain a home whilst also working full time'#only to get to 'the day' and get a 'its not going to work out after all sorry....we are just so Busy prepping for our travel abroad next#month you know? it would be too Stressful to have a third person in the house'#YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME ABT STRESS RIGHT NOW????? BE SO FOR REAL----#like if u werent free fine. u dont owe me shit im grown. BUT2 PROMISE IT AND REAFFIRM IT TIME AFTER TIME AND THEN BACK OUT IN THE 11TH HOUR#SERIOUSLY???#I love them but this. fucking Hurts. and I had to pretend it Didnt so as to not make a scene
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sometimes self care is drawing your own custom card holder cover
#oh ghostroach lovers u r in luck#my hairpin is the glue holding my id card together and not snapping open đ#one more week and my internship will end...#which means more time to draw!! until my final exams hit me a wk later#waaaa why did they arrange theory finals AFTER the internship... how r we supposed to sit down and study quietly#after walking around n using the knowledge practically#maybe... i will stream to hold myself accountable... both studying drawing and studying of my finals after my internship ends...#my bedtime schedule will probably remain cooked so might as well use it to my advantage#remains a tentative plan but yeah maybe u guys can come and watch me fumble around and chat#i would love to join a discord but i would just lurk sobs#and i really want to talk with fellow roach and ghostroach enthusiasts!! but im afraid of saying the wrong thing or it can be misunderstood#so in the end i just say nothing which is bad because nobody knows what im thinking until i say it out loud#i just want to let you guys know that i appreciate all your likes comments and tags dearly and i dont know how to respond to them#twt is a direct reply so it doesnt feel weird to just reply#but tumblr feels different to me#rambling
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day fucking ruined nvm
#cowboy cries cowboy tears#bye then i guess? iâve been up since 6:30 cleaning and taking care of the chickens on four fuckin hours of sleep#and all this punk has to say as he runs out the door to school is âi canât handle dinner tonight you need to figure it outâ#brotha. we are a two person team. i cannot legally drive alone.#scout i realize you need your precious fucking beauty sleep and youâre in school but i would like to eatđ„° at some pointđ„° and not cook đ„°#like maybe iâm being a little dramatic sure but why does he get to live large and go thrifting with his friends or some shit after school#when iâm making dinner and cleaning and taking care of everything else#1950s housewives were so justified in killing their husbands iâm being so serious i know heâs my brother but i feel like a single mother rn
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im so excited for this weeeeek
but anyways have another whiteboard doodle instead of actual art đ
Somewhere over the rainbow,
Skies are blue
and the dreams that you dare to dream
really do come true~
yes i did make her Dorothy try stopping me/lh
#ITS ALL MIMINUM DAYS#WE GET OUT RIGHT AFTER LUNCH IM SO HAPPY#PLUS#NO ANNOYING ASS PACKET#I WONT BE DYING ON FRIDAY MORNING TRING TO FINISH IT LIKE I ALWAYS AM!!#POGGERS!!#/lh#i prommy im cooking stuff up i prommy#why do i waste all my time and energy⊠on a silly wb doodleâŠ#molly melancholy#welcome home oc#welcome home#welcome home au#maybe an au??#i do be planning smth#but itâs a MAYBE#i lack motivation to do anything đ#IM SUFFERING SO BAD WITH ARTBLOCK RN PLEASE HELP
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New Employee aquired today
My manager: Hey Grace maybe you can show NE some things, but don't overwhelm her
Me:
Me: so like. make sure it's not a repeat of my first day???
#like maam ive worked here for barely a month you know this#and my first ever shift was 8 hours and CLOSING#i did a lil bit of everything my first day why do you think im so adaptable to what you need now???#anyways i had NE help shred chicken cause we needed more and then i couldnt even use it bc we were out of the salad kit đ#today twas a long day#i was supposed to do subs but literally worked on salads all day cause we were so short staffed#a coworker who YESTERDAY asked for a shift today never showed up. our manager had to open and was barely through salads when i got there#(3 hours after open)#me and manager tackled customer service and did as many tasks as we could (specifically distress and make salads)#(i learned how to do temps)#morning cook stayed late WITHOUT TAKING A BREAK to bring back some stuff we needed#closing cook got sick and left when me and NE did leaving i assume 2 store managers (maybe just 1) and one coworker to close#we so short staffed they had a job fair JUST FOR OUR DEPARTMENT.#anywho#ive also been up technically since 1-2am. i got extra 1 hour between then and 5:30am before i had to get up. i went to bed at 9pm#so. ive been tired all day but since i dont have work tomorrow im gonna stay up late and chill#amber's shit you can ignore
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Mel for the unhinged character bingo!
yessss YEEEESSSSSSSSS
#ask me#so Mel is in the unenviable position of being a very strong character whose rights I support and whose wrongs I also fully support#BUT the way she's treated broadly in the fandom is so pervasive and so consistent and so frustrating to me that#I am in full -must protect my blorbo- mode with her at all times#-Mel's story is over so the only thing left for her to do is die-#-if Mel dies then J can get together with V and they will appreciate her for her sacrifice bc she died a hero who rejected Ambessa-#enough! enough I say!#what about proving to ambessa that she can take the throne for herself? what about the angst of defying her mother and her home country#and opposing those in Piltover who DO want war and want to raze the undercity#what about the magic that she's heavily foreshadowed to have and how it's different from hextech#and how it directly opposes but also parallels what is happening to Viktor#what about her -friends- abroad and the plot Mel was cooking through all of season 1 that has not been revealed yet#there's so much potential for her to have to confront the fact that J was slowly becoming a monster through season 1#and that she can't ignore the undercity forever#also what if whoever Ambessa says killed her brother comes after Mel too!#it is very frustrating to see Mel get dismissed as dead or evil or irredeemable or whatever when she is consistently#the most interesting person in the room in every single scene she's in and the character who shows the most conviction and change#so yeah i will take a bullet for her she is my blorbo I will despise any character who hurts her#and I would cradle her in my arms if she gave me a chance - which she would never! - but a girl can dream#however I also enjoy leaning into the idea that Mel is perceived as being a devil from the outside - Mel leans into it too when it serves#but it's in direct opposition to her ironclad values and the personality that she keeps hidden a layer down#I genuinely think that Mel will have a happy ending - or at least as happy an ending that an Arcane character can get lol#like I fully believe she will take the throne (Piltover) in the end but I can only guess at this point what that will cost her#I love putting Mel in situations but mainly to play with both how creative she can get and also how fucking far she will go to win#which is ANOTHER thing we know is probably true about Mel but has not been put on display yet#also Mel has already done a great job at separating what she wants for herself as a person from just being Ambessa's daughter#but Mel still deserves to get plenty of great therapy for that situation because OH GOD THAT CHILDHOOD FLASHBACK#also Kino is dead? maybe dead?? at least Mel fully believes he's dead so she needs therapy and hugs for that too#I am super normal about her can you tell
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Shout-out to everyone who survived a "fun" easter with the family
#fucking hell#it started with finding out my dad smoked in my car when I picked up my sister#who was equally dreading the day#my mum turns into the world's tensest and judgemental presence. worsened by my aunt#then hell for autistic people (of which there are multiple present)#multiple deaf people means one uninspired conversation that isn't interesting in any way.#combinations of passive aggressiveness and people not saying a thing because they can't participate. voice volumes too damn high#weirdass food situations. Very full table. so many smells.#this goes on for over an hour. wishing for literally anything but being there. soul crushing.#then you still have to sit in that room for 2.5 hours. it just goes on and on.#my autistic deaf dad physically looks like how I feel. my mum and aunt keep piling on top of him to demand his mental presence#i leave the room once (to get my phone to show pictures to my uncle) and am immediately followed upstairs by my mum#who demands I don't leave the room (What's next. following me when I need the toilet?)#me and my sister are so bored we start throwing paper planes and fake fighting.#Which amuses the bored and the deaf#but of course my mum and aunt have opinions and this is not allowed. only soul crushing boredom allowed#they complain to each other over it while aggressively doing dishes#finally it ends because my mum and aunt start insisting my dad should go to bed if he's 'that tired'. *sprinkle on some additional ableism*#still sitting through a conversation about allergies one of my sister's friends has. my mum preaching that people should take that seriously#(meanwhile i had to cook for myself for 9 years because when my allergies were really bad no one bothered to check if i could eat something)#me and my sister go sit upstairs to discover our mum has made things we care about vanish in her room#and made things appear that should not be there#I've washed the interior of my car and hope the smell will go#you think it's over after that. but woke up with the realisation that even more things have disappeared from my sister's room.#i can't remember a time when things left outside of my room didn't disappear#I don't know why we do these family gatherings at all. no one has fun on days like that.#the housing crisis isn't making these things easy. my sister is losing her place to live again as well#she'll go hiking for a month and then work on a campsite over the summer#maybe I'll go house sitting again. idk.#can't make commitments a few months in advance like that because I'll cancel everything the second Sparks announces anything important
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#was gonna pierce my lip but I realized I lost all the caps to my barbell piercings and I didn't even realize. I'm so fuckin mad#now I have to get more#idk if I can just get the screw on heads. idk what mm size they are#anyway. bone broth is successful. it's been slow cooking all day and looks and smells good. it's gonna make for hella nutritious soup base.#also I've been hunting down Spanish vocab audio because that's how I learn best.#listening to more language transfer and adding music to my Spanish playlist.#still definitely not conversational but my comprehension is going up quite a bit.#I had a grumpy Russian man come through my lane today and the desire to communicate better was so strong.#I just wanna learn all the languages.#I just need to find more resources that work for my brain.#I have a Spanish vocab book and I hardly touch it. duolingo sucks for me. I hate Rosetta Stone.#but there's resources out on the internet I just have to find them and use them.#there's a few good ones on Spotify I've found. as much as I hate Spotify conceptually for music artists it's still a resource I can use.#as much as I don't wanna apply for new jobs I don't wanna work in the same place next year when we move.#I still really wanna try food service. my speech has gotten way better and my stutter is almost never present#so job interviews should be way easier to pull off. I hope. I really hope.#I really wanna get back into nursing but idk if we're moving early enough for me to get into a cna certification class for spring semester.#I really should email the local community college and find out if I can pull off a late start or jump into a class already partway through.#I could look that up right now actually. find out when classes start there and how much I would be missing.#because I've passed the certification before it shouldn't be hard to jump in partway through I think.#hah. I'm so competent. I just looked up the information right now. there's an adult education center where I'm moving that offers the course#but not until halfway through spring.#so I could work food service for the spring and then switch to cna after.#I'm medicated so it's entirely possible and feasible. I have the ability.#hmmm. if I'm going into nursing maybe I should reconsider the lip piercing? hmmmm.#I can just let it heal over if it's an issue.#plenty of time between now and then.#anyway I'm going to bed good night.#well. maybe going to bed.
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Does anyone else have a lot of trouble picking up information like if I read something I don't learn anything but when I read it for the twentieth time I maybe pick up half
#is this just an ADHD thing#or an add thing i have that#neurodivergent#that tag felt right but idk if it fits yet#is it like offensive if I keep it#who would i be offending thats literally me#i dont know a lot about my ADD tho#its weird i can just have a conversation with myself in the tags#does anyone even read this far into the tags#its not like anyone will see this anyhow right#we need to clear all those old posts i feel like there is like 5 posts from 2002 that get all the attention#they should make cigarettes cost less theres no way a piece of paper cotten and some leafs cost that much#a pack should be like 1.25 i bet thats how much a pack costs to make ehh maybe more like 3.75#i wish i had a cigarette#but i dont even have a lighter itd be pointless#god i wish i had a genie#id be so lit with a genie#id wish for a backpack that i can pull whatever i want out of that nobody else can use and I can't lose#man I'd abuse some genie powers#MALLLLLLLLMOOOOOOO#how far am i now#there's no way any person read this far down#it might be less than i thought#like how spinach like q fucking bucket full after cooking is like 2 leaves#i wish i could cook#that'd be so fucking lit#i think im pretty far down now#this song fucking slaps#i wonder how long i can do this#testicle tag
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#thoughts#personal#mental health tw#it's complicated because I both want to address how fucking unhinged I very publically am at the moment#for which I am sorry if you have noticed#and also Not do that and pretend my weirdass behavior flies under the radar and I am being So Very Normal Right Now#which I feel we are past that point but also maybe who cares I don't think people notice but You Know#you get in the thought loop and then it's over#I used to have a private twitter to have weird meltdowns full of me immediately deleting everything I posted#and then I went âwow!! this is not happening anymore!! look at me being an adult about it!!â#and uhh lol#I didn't want it to happen here it's very humiliating to know you are Like This and not being able to affect it much#this too shall pass I suppose#normal posting (???) will resume shortly#I just get super manic when I have mental health cocktails like this + my brain Will Not let me sleep and I need to distract myself#all I want to say is: I'll be normal again at some point probably#it was on slow cook since maybe 9 months and baby it's here now#I'm supposed to go to my first industry event RIGHT after a very very tense burial and I'm already so disheveled like girl what#I'm so going to begin screaming at an industry legend for no reason and then immediately lock myself in a bathroom#anyway. common sense and self control will be back soon#and there are good chances I'll delete this post too at some point!! but. yeah.#it is what it is tm#hope you are as okay as could be#and if not all the courage and strength your way#sending many angry blue ganonpigs your way too. hope that helps! somehow!
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UNFORTUNATELY I AM FOND OF VALORANT. THE DOPAMINE RUSH I AM HAVING AT THE MOMENT IS UNPRECEDENTED
#WE WERE DOWN SO BAD#I HIT THE NASTIEST SHOTS OF MY LIFE MAYBE#WON 13-11 THRU THE POWER OF RAGE ALONE. ME AND DUO SAID FUUUCK THESE KIDS#I WAS BOT FRAG AND THEN SECOND TO TOP FRAG I SAAAID. I SAID TEAM WE WIN NOW. ATTACK ROUND WE WIN#I KNEW. DOPAMINE#got off after that one bc i can. withstand the urge which is good it is an addiction game#i knew my bind attack side goes CRAZY i chose clove instead of senti for a god damn reason#attack side we win we fuckin win. i haven't checked my math hw in two days.#home all day tomorrow ill take meds and run it#my duo was also cooking. enemy team pissed him off
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FF guys, am i right?đđ
#Pan gushes#âPanchi I think you may have a typeâ MAYBE I DO#But I love them all so much!!!#Zack is so sweet and handsome and funny and amazing-agjsngjsjfjdjfkd My favorite porcupine <3#His hair is so spikey-agjsjfjdjf Makes me wonder what it looks like when it's wet#Also the earring!! gkdngkdkf I'm not an earring person but for the longest time I've debated getting one like Zack's so we can matchđđ#My s/i does wear an earring though! it's so neat!!#Oh and P.rompto and Noct are so pretty!!!#Hehe my bfs! they're both the cutest ever!#I love hanging out with them so much!#Either it be playing video games to together or watching shows/movies or chatting while on the Regalia-It's all fun!#And it's extra fun to tease them both and make them blush hehe!#Years after the three of them are together and such-My s/i loves to fluster the two by calling them âmy kingsâ#but it comes with the downside that it's easy to counter once Noct or P.rompto mention that the whole Royalty thing would also apply to them#Agjsjfjsjfkd Easy for my s/i to fluster and be flustered#Oh and of course I saved the best for last!! SNOW MY HUSBAND!! <3#I love him so so much!#The fact that the new world at the end of the third game seems to just be the modern world#means that It's pretty easy for me to imagine him being with me when I do everyday things! it's so fun!#Sitting on his lap while I play games. or cooking dinner for the both of us. going shopping together-#gjdbgjdjf the smallest things make me all fluttery!#Earlier I was thinking about how he works out at the gym pretty often#and he'd absolutely be the type to send photos to my s/i after a workout. makes my s/i flustered every time!#Afjsbfjdjfk Apologies this gush post got so long! I just love them all so much!! smooch smooch for them!#f/o: âïž#f/o: đ¶#f/o: đ€#f/o: đ·
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one of my favourite things is when you look up a recipe and the person who posted it has a little thing talking about their life and why they love this specific thing like maybe their grandma used to make it when they were a kid or something i donât know i just love to read it and it makes me feel kinda alright about the world for a moment
#itâs so heart warming iâm like yeah maybe everything isnât so bad maybe we can all make it with little moments like this#like i donât personally have the experience of learning a recipe from someone or cooking with someone as a kid so itâs nice to read#the closest thing for me is probably my aunties ex bf who used to get blasted and make rock cakes with me when he looked after me#maybe thatâs heart warming in itâs own way#anyway iâm so gonna be that person teaching my niece how to cook and shit because i think thatâs such a neat memory to have
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