#maybe prof will give me a break considering this is supposed to be done with a partner

[a-crystalclearsquid]

sometimes i hate myself and i wonder why. then i find myself at 3 am, shaking from caffeine and writing this post during a "small" break from working on a paper due a month ago but my prof was only asking for it now and im struggling to finish this by day and make a random excuse so it doesn't seem like i just made this overnight instead of a month ago

im suffering for the consequences of my actions because of my apathy to get this paper done on time

[miekasa]

mie….could we please get college au eren headcanons👉🏽👈🏽

Of course. I’m always thinking about his big head anyway <33 might as well put it good use.

One thing he learned in college is how to make his hyperfocus/fixation episodes work for him; that’s why he schedules all his classes as close together as possible. He’d rather have class back to back for 5 hours, than have it spread out with hours in between lectures, because that increases his changes of cutting.

You can always tell when he’s in class and/or what class he’s in by how much he responds to your messages. If he doesn’t text back at all, he’s in a class that hard or one he enjoys, or both. But if he’s sending you iMessage games, then you know he’s in his elective that he couldn’t care else about (and is probably cheating in someway somehow lmfao). 

He usually puts his phone on dnd when he’s in a class that’s important, but you’re in his favorite contacts, so your messages always ring through. What if it’s an emergency and you need him for something? Advanced Roots of Human Biology can wait. 

Some days there are one or two our breaks between his lectures, that’s just how the scheduling works out. When that happens, he usually sneaks into one of your lectures, or goes to your place to take a nap. Your roommates have become accustomed to him, honestly they’ve been considering giving him a key. 

Once, he didn’t realize that your lecture was basically a seminar, with you, the prof and maybe six other students. He still stayed lmao, and the prof was so amazed by his dedication, that she didn’t even mind. Occasionally, you’ll catch the two of them talking after lecture. It’s pretty cute the way she’s adopted him into the class even tho he’s not on the roster. 

You... have to show him where the library is lmfao. He genuinely has not stepped foot in one until you bring him to one. He likes it tho lmao once he gets used to it. 

Speaking of which, do not give him standard directions to find your classes on campus because all you’ll get is, “Babe, I’m gonna keep it real with you, I’ve never heard of the ‘West Quad’ a day in my life. What building are you near.”

He usually comes to see you in the library after all his lectures are done for the day. Sometimes he does homework, sometimes he’s just fucking around on his computer, sometimes he’s just bothering you. When you have to leave to go to class, he stays behind to watch your stuff so you don’t have to pack everything up and come back. 

Very protective when it comes to keeping your seat for you. No, you cannot take that chair to your table you good for nothing freshman; it’s reserved for you. 

He’ll drag you out of the library if you’ve been cooped up all day, tho. Eren will use his height and his strength against you to get you up. Placates you with kisses when he sees your angry expression, and promises to buy you food.

He takes your backpack for you when you’re walking together,m. His backpack is frustratingly light all the time, even during midterms. You swear all he’s got in there is a pencil and some flashcards. 

If you have night classes, he sticks around to walk you home after, especially in the winter when it gets dark faster. If he’s not already on campus, he’ll walk/drive back to meet you; he just doesn’t like you going home alone. Even if your friend/roommate is in the class with you, Eren will walk or drive the both of you home for his own sanity. 

He plays sports, so he usually has practice most evenings, but he’ll find a way to make time. If practice was particularly brutal, he’ll probably crash at your place.

He loves it when you come to meet him after practice. His whole face lights up and he waves obnoxiously, before he gathers up his stuff and all but sprints towards you. You get a cold water bottle to the face, or a bit of water splashed on you usually, which he takes immense amusement in. 

He knows it’s not possible for you to make it to all of his games, and usually it doesn’t bother him much; you’ve got your own life, and work to worry about. All he asks is that you wear his jersey, or any item of his sports apparel/merch on game day (he’s partial to hoodies).

By the time junior year rolls around, he’s not all that interested in attending parties that aren’t hosted by your friends; so, unless it’s at Connie, Jean, or Reiner and Bertholdt’s place, Eren will usually decline. Even team parties, he’s not crazy about unless it’s to celebrate a championship or something. He’d much rather celebrate with you. 

He does get excited about hosting parties though, and he and Jean become pretty damn good co-hosts. They don’t throw ragers, and that’s probably why Eren likes it so much. It’s usually your friend group and a couple plus ones, some good music, games, weed, and take-out. 

He’ll buy you coffee whenever you ask for it. The first time, he just orders something plain, not really knowing the difference between anything; but give it two or three tries, and he’ll get it perfect. He becomes so good that he can order you something new/different and you’ll love it. 

That’s kind of the start of his own coffee addiction, and more often than not, when he buys you a cup, he’s on his second or third of the day himself. The flavor has really grown on him, okay. 

He much prefers your apartment, but on occasion, he’ll ask you to come to his. You’ve been studying for so long, a change of environment should do you good, he claims. He’s a fucking liar tho because that’s all Eren Talk for “I do genuinely want you to come over, but my plans are to coerce you out of doing your assignments and doing me instead.”

Lmfao he adds you on Apple Watch Rings just so you can see him close his rings every day and laugh at you. Even if yours get closed by virtue of walking around campus or working out or whatever, his numbers are stupidly high because he fucking has practice at least 4 days of the week. 

Of course when you’re running on a soccer field for 2 hours every day, you close your Move Ring five times, Eren. Leave the rest of us alone. 

He buys you guys matching accessories for your keychains. It’s something pretty cute, and slightly random, but it reminded him of you. It also serves as a reminder to himself to take his fucking keys with him when he leaves his house. 

He sleeps like a fucking rock, so do not let him fall asleep in the library. Waking him up is a mission, and he’s never happy to be woken up. He looks kinda cute tho. 

He schedules dates for you and his friends. Usually by accident, but hear me out. Sometimes he’ll make plans with Armin, then forget that he has class or a test or something; so his solution is to text you, “hey, i forgot min and i were supposed to go some aquarium tomorrow but i have a midterm so here’s the pdf of my ticket, go with him for me, thanks babe love u” then, boop, you and Armin have an aquarium date Friday evening. 

The same thing happens with Mikasa, though, she usually catches the scheduling conflict before Eren does, and invites you out herself. You and Mikasa hang out quite a bit anyway, so it comes to the point where she tells you when she’s gonna hang out with Eren, so you can make yourself free for when he inevitably remember he has a game that day. 

Mikasa is most amazed that you’ve put up with Eren this long lmao. You’ve certainly lessened her Eren & Armin babysitting hours, and for that she’s eternally grateful. Also, she’s just happy to have another close friend. She loves Eren and Armin, but they’re not the most social beings, and she was literally their only friend besides the other for all their childhood PLEASE she’s so happy you’re around. 

It’s Mikasa, however, who babysits you and Eren whenever you both get too drunk. Says you guys are two peas in a pod (affectionate<2)

If you tell Eren something important that happened, like an internship you got, or a good grade in a class, or something, he usually relays that information to his mom pls. He texts her every day, and if she doesn’t ask for an update on you first, he gives her one.

Carla calls you sometimes, too. At least once every few weeks, just to check on you herself. She really likes you for Eren, and is grateful someone is willing to put up with her hotheaded son. 

Eren’s always using your fucking chapstick. Always. You know he has his own, so why he needs to use yours is beyond you. Finds time to make some dumbass comment about how it’s an “indirect kiss” every time he uses it too. Like bro, we’re dating, and have had many direct kisses why are you like this.

He posts on Instagram every few weeks or so, but you’re on his story every few days. Usually, it’s just a video of you minding your business and doing your work while Eren slowly zooms in before making some loud noise to surprise you, all so he can get your reaction on video and laugh at it. He’s annoying. 

He’s a bit of a copycat when it comes to the products you use. He’ll buy the same brand of pens as you (for that matter, all of his school supplies mirror yours because what does he know about the difference between A4 and A5 notebooks?), put a little hand sanitizer on his backpack like yours (and a lotion, too, for good measure), he even copies your Starbucks order until he finds one he likes for himself. It’s one of his love languages <3

If you’re wondering where your eyelash curler went, Eren stole it to try it on himself, hurt himself, vowed to never use it again, went back because he wanted to “do it right and not give up,” liked the results when he didn’t pinch his eyelid, and now it’s his. 

That being said, stop trying to put your Fenty lipgloss on him, it’s never going to happen. Eye makeup, maybe, only if you sit in his lap and he can have his hands on your ass while you do it. 

What he does love is letting you do his skincare. He will set aside dedicated skincare nights, he adores it. Easily one of his favorite things ever. 

You have his wallet. Not because he’s your sugar daddy or anything (although, if you want something, he’d definitely let you use his card to get it; and even if you bought something without asking, he wouldn’t think twice about it), but because he put it in your bag once and never took it out. 

When you tried to give it back, he just shook his head and told you to keep it, “I have my ID in my phone case anyway, and you’re less likely to lose it. Plus I put all my cards on Apple Pay, so I’m good.”

When you do make it to a game of his, he’s all over you when it’s over. Not in a cocky athlete boyfriend kind of way; in a very sleepy boyfriend kind of way. He’s usually got ice on at least one part of his body, and he’s got half his body weight on you as you walk to the car. 

By the time you guys get back to your place, he’s practically sleep walking. The only thing on his mind is taking a hot shower to soothe his muscles, and heading to bed. The aftermath of game days aren’t all that bad though, because even if you didn’t show, you’re always there to kiss him when he’s home and massage his shoulders, and cuddle him to sleep; and that’s his favorite part. 

[jusvibbbin]

The Perfect Piece

Data x Reader Insert

You turned to look at the class. “See, was that so bad?” The class stared at the board and groaned. Your smile faltered and you looked back at the board. Maybe they weren’t ready for division. You checked the clock and the smile reappeared. Or maybe it’s because it’s 2:05 on a Friday. You decided to be merciful to the fourth grade class and let them out early. 

“Well maybe that was kind of difficult,” you chuckled. “Why don’t we spend one more weekend on multiplication and next Monday we’ll pick the division back up. Class dismissed!” The children shot up and grabbed their PADDs before running out the door. You shook your head and walked over to your desk. Might as well get some grading done and call it a day. You were just as ready to go home as the class. 

“Excuse me (Miss/Mister/Prof) (Y/L/N)?”

You looked up at none other than Lieutenant Commander Data. You felt your cheeks heat up slightly. The Commander had a reputation for talking for far too long and making situations unnecessarily awkward, but you found him cute and at times, quite funny. The two of you spoke very rarely; at holiday parties or on Picard Day, if he chose to accompany the ever-uncomfortable Captain. 

“Commander! What an unexpected surprise!” you smiled, standing from behind the desk to walk around and meet him in the middle of the classroom. 

“Is not every surprise unexpected?” Data queried, giving a slight smile to mirror your expression. You blinked and inwardly smacked yourself. Wow what an opener. You laugh it off, clearly embarrassed. 

“I suppose that’s true. To what do I owe the pleasure?” 

Data looked around the classroom at the decorations the various classes had made to give the classroom ‘lived-in’ feel, away from the sterile and by-the-book Starfleet look. 

“I wish to discuss your classroom.”

“What? Really?” you beamed, proud of the work your students had done.

Data nodded. “I would like to give my quarters more of a personal touch. I have observed that your classroom is decorated with the artwork of the children, regardless of if it is not well made.”

You choked on the air in your throat and started laughing.

“Mr. Data!! You can’t say that! It will discourage the children.” 

Data looked around the room and out into the adjacent corridor. He looked back at you and met your eyes. You took in how close the two of you were, but did nothing to widen the gap.

“I apologize if I offended you but I did not see any children present to hear my comment. I am only curious as to why you put it all up despite the varying quality.”

“Well…” you smiled at him, never breaking the eye contact he established. “It helps show the children that the room belongs to them as much as it does anyone else. I even put a piece up.” 

Data’s eyebrows raised at this. 

“Which one is yours?” There was almost an excitement behind his eyes but you shook away the thought. Data doesn’t have feelings like that. 

“You’ll have to guess.” you responded almost flirtatiously. Data flashed you a full smile and your knees nearly buckled. You placed a hand on the closest desk, hoping that your attempt to stabilize yourself looked more casual than it felt. 

Data began walking around the room, looking at the pieces on the walls, the shelves and hanging from the ceiling. You smiled, knowing yours was on the complete other side of the room. Data stopped walking and turned to look at you, smirking with something like confidence. Good God, how much time did his creator spend on his eyes? It must have taken…

“(Y/N)?” Data said, confusion laced in his voice as he looked at your glazed over eyes.

“Oh gosh, Data! I’m sorry I must have been somewhere else.” You chuckled awkwardly as you cursed yourself for being so infatuated with the one man who could not return your sentiments. 

“Which one did you pick?” you asked, desperate to get the conversation back on track. Data looked at you a moment longer before pointing at a painting hung up on the wall across from you. You grinned and shook your head.

“I thought you were the great Sherlock Holmes, Data!” You turned around and moved a desk into the corner behind you before standing on it. Data watched you quizzically as you took down a hanging model of a star made out of small spare parts from a broken replicator or a tricorder that you painted yellow. You stepped down from the desk and held it up to show him.

“I had not considered that your piece might also be objectively amateur,” Data said matter-of-factly. You laughed loudly and put a hand on your chest.

“Wow Data, you really know how to compliment someone! I know I’m not very good at art but it’s about having fun and being proud of what you make in the end.” 

“So you think that I should decorate my quarters with my own artwork?” 

You smiled at him and nodded as he continued to look at the star. 

“Why did you choose to make it out of spare parts and slightly sharp things? Is that not dangerous?” 

You looked at your model as you collected your words. “For starters, it’s very securely attached to the ceiling and no one sits under it. I made it this way to show that as stunning and beneficial as stars are, they’re also very volatile and powerful. Not a force to be reckoned with!”

Data held his hands out and you handed the model to him. You felt a sharp pain in your hand and looked down.

“If art is not your strong suit, perhaps I could teach-”

Data didn’t have a chance to finish his sentence as he looked up in time to see your eyes roll into the back of your head and he quickly caught you before you hit the ground. He set the model down on a desk and picked you up with both hands, gently cradling you against his chest before walking towards sickbay. He assessed you as he walked, looking for injury or signs of a heart attack or a brain aneurysm and finding none. He entered a turbolift as you came to.

“D-Data? What are you doing?!” you yelped, taking in your surroundings. His arms underneath you, pressing you into his hard chest. His eyes scanning your confused face, looking at you full of concern. I must be dreaming.

“You passed out in the classroom. I did not see a probable cause so I elected to carry you to sickbay and have Dr. Crusher examine you.” As he said all this you touched your right hand lightly to your left index finger. It felt wet and you remembered why you fainted.

“Data, we don’t have to go to sickbay,” you said as he strode out of the turbolift and into a busy corridor. You cheeks heated up and you added, “So you can put me down now!” 

Data looked at you again and shook his head. “I am sorry (Y/N) but unless you have an accurate cause, I insist you are seen by a medical professional. It is best not to participate in physical activity until you are cleared for it. I do not mind carrying you to sickbay. You are not heavy.” He continued walking and you sighed, although you secretly loved the attention and care he was putting into making sure you were alright. He would do that for anybody!

“Data if I can tell you why, will you put me down?” 

He stopped walking and looked at you, waiting.

You held up your slightly bloody finger, careful to not look at it. 

Data looked at the prick on your finger then at you as you stared at the ground. He gently set you on the ground and gingerly took your hand in both of his so he could inspect the wound. You thought you might pass out again at his touch and you swallowed hard. 

“This wound seems very superficial for you to have a head injury as a result.” Still holding your hand, he began walking back towards the turbolift. You were too starstruck to protest. He called for a deck number but you weren’t listening as you tried to form a sentence.

“I uh… I don’t like seeing blood. I’ve fainted every time since I was a kid.” You looked at your joined hands again and a small smile appeared on your lips.

Data’s eyes looked as though he was searching for something before saying, “Ah, vasovagal syncope.”

You nodded, slightly in awe of his processing ability. The turbolift doors opened and he led you down a couple of corridors before stopping at some quarters. These aren’t mine…

He pressed the control panel to the side of the doors and they swooshed open revealing a sparsely decorated room. There was a coffee table, a couch, a desk in the far corner with a huge computer and an orange tabby waiting by the replicator, meowing.

“I will feed you momentarily, Spot. First, I must attend to our guest.” Data led you to the couch and let go of your hand. You sat as he walked over to a storage cabinet and retrieved a medkit. He came back to you and used the dermal re-generator to mend the small cut on your finger. You looked at your finger and smiled at him gratefully. He set the medkit on the table and sat close besides you on the couch. 

“Thanks Data. I really appreciate you taking care of me in my hour of need.”

“(Y/N) only twenty minutes have passed since you fainted.”

You laughed and leaned into the back of his couch. “It’s an expression, Data!” His puzzled look turned into one of understanding, but he said nothing as he also leaned into the couch and angled himself to face you fully. You once again took in your close proximity, debating on moving away. And again, you didn’t. 

The two of you chatted for a little while about your work, about the new interpersonal subroutine he and Commander La Forge had created, about his pet, and then finally about art.

“So do you know what you might do with your room decor?” you asked with a smile, your mind still on what sort of things the subroutine had added. Maybe that’s why he wants his room decorated. Or why he took care of me today. You tried to expel that last thought from your mind.

Data was quiet for a moment, seemingly pondering what he was going to say. 

“I believe I already have the perfect piece.” He smiled sweetly at you and you looked around the room. 

“Where is it?” you asked, confused.

He leaned in so close that his mouth was nearly touching your ear before whispering flirtatiously, “Guess.”

[vaguely-concerned]

X-men Evolution; the great 2021 rewatch liveblog

exactly what it says on the tin, about halfway through the show I had TOO MANY FEELINGS and had to start writing some of them out haha (gets quite gambit & rogue/gambit heavy in the latter half, Because of Who I Am as a Person)

- this is my childhood’s x-men, my formative experience with them, and I’m happy to report that still seems like a good thing. the little eleven year old within me gets to geek out and have a good time with the characters and the surprisingly good animation and writing, adult me gets to CACKLE at regular intervals at the fashion/technology/absolute bonkers hot garbage comic book nonsense they use to justify a storyline every now and then, it’s been a good time 

- I was like ‘ah well it is super dated it probably won’t be quite the same now’ and then rogue’s HAIR did the THING in the opening and ‘it’s all coming back to me now’ started playing in the background... the little baby queer in me swooning across time and space

- such a good beast, both his design and the writing, my heart aches for him all the time. he’s just so passionate! about being a teacher! helping young humans learn the stuff they’ll need in life! the most wonderful nerd man, just let good things happen for him

- I’m going to go ahead and assume that rogue’s ‘crush’ on scott is more of a deeply complex psychological process about desiring normalcy and intimacy and trying to figure out if she’s queer and dealing with her emerging sexuality and latching on to the first and best safely unavailable and nonthreatening older boy to project these issues onto rather than actually being a real thing, because I respect her so much as a person and I cannot bring myself to imagine she’s honestly attracted to a man who has POSTERS OF CARS on his bedroom wall. (I’ll give jean a break just because she seems to have a longer deeper history with him that might counteract some of that libido-kill, and also she’s a jock so lol)

like I am very sorry but can u imagine being a teenage girl with any interest in a boy with model cars in his bedroom when gambit’s swanning around being a much, much, much worse choice on almost every possible level but in a teen girl kryptonite kind of way? inconceivable  

(I drag scott quite a few times in this and it’s not because I don’t love him, it’s just his tragedy to be the most draggable man in the world)

to be fair by the time gambit shows up that whole Situation has mostly played itself out I suppose but still  

- toad’s design is so ineffably brilliant, I can’t quite tell you why but that ugly cute charm has really stuck with me, he’s one of the characters I remembered the best to this day just visually

- poor evan... he truly never had a chance, did he, they just saddled him with the most 90s teen bullshit they could come up with like he’s some kind of ‘what adult writers think teens like’ frankenstein’s monster ;______; it’s not your fault honey

- poor poor POOR storm, she gets one focus episode and they were like ‘we’re going to make an episode so racist -- ‘

I’m still STUNNED at how bad it was, but undeniably I laughed hysterically to the point that my neighbours were probably worried when that dude was earnestly like ‘He [stunningly breathlessly racist caricature of a ‘witch doctor’ guy] has stolen her powers, and he’s going to use them to take over Africa!!!’ fhajsdlfhsakjldfh oh really? tell me more, like how the fUCK this could be on television within my life time fasdlfhsdkjfhsad f  just... fahjksdfh

- it’s a testament to gambit’s appeal as a character that his charm can survive what they’ve done with his hair and beard choices in this one fajskfhs regrettable but true I still fuckn LOVE him and in my highly biased yet Correct opinion he should have been around much more. get you a man who manages to stay hot through sheer Vibes even with a bowl cut

- aw scott/jean is kind of sweet in this show even if it’s taking them forEVER to get there, I like it 

- it’s very nice of rogue to not mention magneto’s romantic daydreams and nostalgic memories about charles xavier after touching his face that one time... or maybe her brain did her a service and repressed it, there’s some stuff you shouldn’t have to know about your father figure   

- the danger room is the very definition of ‘why do we even have that lever’ and I wonder what the fuck prof x does to have enough money to replace everything that gets busted all the time

- I’d say that a lot of the writing holds up surprisingly well! (but some of it is also incredibly inexcusably racist in ways that beggar belief, so... not full marks here) the characters have distinct voices and their arcs are set up and delivered on solidly for the most part, and there’s a lot of love showing through in small moments that are just there to have a funny/interesting thing to say about the characters and how their powers work separately and in combination. listen, sometimes I get so thirsty for like. basic goddamn competency in storytelling, let me have this

- ugggggh why is there captain america in my x-men have I not suffered enough... very very funny when prof x goes ‘sounds like you knew rogers personally’ and logan is like ‘I did ;)’ *all the students ganging up on steve rogers* “did you fuck our teacher, captain america?!”

- fskadfhas WHY are you showing me hot young-ified magneto’s ass fksjahfskj charles is not even here to see it, what a tragic waste erik 

- ...I was sort of kidding before but uh I think logan genuinely did fuck captain america (or at least wishes very much that he did lol)

- wanda can have a little watching the world burn. as a treat for the way every single adult in her life has fucking failed her (’aren’t they treating you well here’ professor x she’s in a straightjacket)  

- poor rogue tho can you imagine finding out after your biggest crush on a girl yet that she’s your fucking MOM in disguise... I would break out in cold sweat every time I thought about a boob forever after

- well seems like they really just had all that homoerotic rivalry stuff between quicksilver and spyke in their first ep only to never do anything with that again ever?? I mean even without the gay undertone that seems like a dynamic you spent most of an episode setting up writers what the hell haha

- dslhfkasjlh GAMBIT THERE HE IS MY BOY IS ON THE SCENE THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! I don’t even care about his awful hair situation or the fact that his eyes are wrong here (coloured contact lenses, maybe, for a watsonian explanation? though he’d probably have to get them made special, considering he needs the sclera and the iris covered up in different ways, I’ve seen some comic panels indicating he has been known to?)

(cute little detail: when he shuffles the cards the first time we see him he ends with removing the top card to show the ace of hearts beneath <3 foreshadowing baBEY he’s a... good-ish boy deep down. hey he tries okay shit gets complicated sometimes lol) 

- cracking UP at gambit perched cheerily on the edge of a crate dispensing cards in the middle of the battle... he’s like ‘eh it’s a livin’ sfsajkhf remy stop working for supervillains just because you had nothing to do on a thursday afternoon and they said they’d pay you

- I’m guessing magneto must have imposed a strict order of silence on these guys or something because I cannot imagine any other reason for him to shut up, especially once he notices rogue is a QTE (or, far more likely, they hadn’t settled on any voice actors for the new characters until next season haha. it is kind of odd that they’re all keeping up near monastic silence, though, even sabertooth lol) 

- WHAT an epic first meeting for us rogue/gambit fans here... first his shadow like there’s fireworks going off behind him lighting him up and then he gives her the fuckn king of hearts and she’s so enchanted by his dumb handsome face she doesn’t even notice it’s about to blow up in her hands and it all happens in heavily meaningful silence afjsdfjashjk no wonder this ship ingrained itself in my hindbrain  

yeah look smug while you can remy she’s gonna have you on your knees one day and you’ll be happy about it lol

- god storm is so COOL, everything just fading out of focus when she really gets going... give her more screen time, show!!

- mystique is every person... this person... that person... that bird... that cat... that wolf... I’m not even sure she’s not also me... are you sure she’s not you? 

- holy fuck I respect the hell out of the decision to just... blow up the entire status quo in a season ender, I only vaguely remembered that (actually in general I appreciate how good the continuity is -- buildings and places that get damaged in battles need to be repaired or rebuilt, it makes the consequences feel more real even when no one gets seriously hurt. where they get the money to restore scott’s car and logan’s motorbikes every time they go cablooie is still an open question tho lol is it credit card fraud, professor? is it telepathically acquired blackmail???) 

- I first watched this when I was nine or so, so it’s a real experience to go from my starry eyed intrigued ‘oh my god... they’re teenagers’ to my horrified adult perspective of ‘oh my god... they’re TEENAGERS D:’

that goes double for the brotherhood boys honestly, I’m here with tears in my eyes like ‘I’m sorry the system has failed you so badly you’re all just a bunch of dumb kids whose caretakers clearly fucked up spectacularly’  

like lance is always waiting for mystique to come back because she’s the closest thing he has to a safe parental figure, may we speak about how crushingly depressing that is 

- rogue is so ready to throw hands at literally any moment and for that I love and treasure her immensely (I think getting to see her be so surly and unreasonable and sometimes difficult and jealous, like any teenager, meant a lot to me as a kid who was not really allowed to be any of these things, this version of the character has stayed with me so deeply. she holds on so fiercely to her right to feel what she feels and be what she is even when it’s ‘ugly’ or unreasonable, which I think plays in really interestingly with how her powers involve getting invaded by other people’s thoughts and memories to the point of overwhelming her own sense of self and the fact that she clearly has a lot of self-loathing and self-consciousness and confusion about her identity as well. I love her so much)  

- oooof this is the ‘the gang experience a microaggression’ episode huh (well more like macroagressions really)

hits a bit different with adult eyes and perspective huh

- hearing jean sound almost like a child when she says ‘that’s so unfair!’ somehow has me like ;______; -- she has to be so adult and responsible all the time, and having her be reduced to the kid she still is and should get to be in front of this awful awful man she could squash like a bug with the flick of a thought... ugh I’m Big Sad (it is funny that jean seemingly plays Every Sport tho djfhaskj)

- MY BOY IS BACK!!! this time with the duster coat and his eyes the right colour, im so happy (too bad about the subdued colour scheme tho; I adore his dumb bright pink getup with my whole heart)

it’s kind of adorable that he takes the time to take the bullies aside and go ‘I know these guys can’t wreck you without getting expelled, but I think you’ll find no law set down by god or man would stop me from doing so whenever I wanted to. so piss off and leave them alone’ lol he’s looking out for them, in his own way

- in this episode: remy lebeau wrangles some kids while looking bored yet mildly amused the whole time. what the fuck does magneto have on you for you to agree to this level of babysitting duty buddy

- fun detail I noticed b/c when I get a fave I hyperfixate: he gave rogue the king of hearts before, but he ‘introduces’ himself to the brotherhood here (lol) with the jack of hearts, probably to symbolize he’s here as someone who works for magneto in this setting and not as his own man? it’s a demotion he’s given himself there, anyway, might be he’s not very pleased about his current position huh 

- I like it when rogue and kitty team up, they’re not very effective together but their squabbling is so cute and non-aggressive 

- pietro is what draco malfoy would be if I ever found malfoy interesting to watch for even one moment, every time quicksilver talks I’m like ‘what wonderfully insufferable thing is going to come out of your mouth this time you little shit :’)’

- a) why are scott and logan shirtless for this scene? I am not complaining on the logan side of things at least but why and b) I laughed so hard I almost fell off my couch when scott asked logan if he’d ever been in love and he was like ‘once. she was the most beautiful bike I ever saw’ falsdfhaskjfhsakjlfhasklhjfd THE BEST VERSION OF WOLVERINE EVER, ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES 

- mystique’s sheer dedication to being a petty bitch is kind of inspirational tbh, almost makes me want to go on a completely bonkers and extra crusade of personal revenge myself  

- oooh they’re doing some genuinely cool things with vision/lack of vision in this one (it’s the scott left on his own in the desert without glasses one btw) even visually, dang! I’m so sad this show didn’t get more seasons than it did, honestly, it deserved it

- hell yeah jean wreck her, go get your man with the suspiciously specific clothing damage normally done to female characters 

awww :’) okay yeah they’re super sweet, I love the tiny loving animation details like how he leans his head against her and her stroking his hair away from his eyes

- nooo don’t bully evan leave my t0tally r4dical sk8er boy alone :(

- I love the running joke of people fleeing in blind panic only to reveal that what they’re running from is kitty’s cheerful well meaning little face fskfaskh 

- scott and jean are already peak married after officially being together for one episode and it’s adorable, and they just stone cold threw logan under the bus, rip wolverine we hardly knew ya

fjasdlfasldfhslajdkfhsadkjlfhsdkjalfhsdakfh h jean establishing herself as the alphabitch of this relationship by throwing her man to the wolves right after dsjfhaskjfhaskjhfsakjdhfaskjhfaskdhfskjahfskdajhf get smarter or get volunteered scott 

- ...eyepatch lady is so hot ngl

oh evan went to the place hank used to go to calm down ;________; (honestly he’s kind of won a place in my heart just by being a pretty normal teenage boy haha)

- jesus fucking CHRIST can you imagine being storm having to look her sister in the eye as she tells her ‘I lost your only child, he’s *vague gesture* somewhere in the sewers we think’ this poor woman

- amanda the self admitted monster fucker you are so VALID (I love her and her family’s design so much tho!)

- it’s so cool that even in his human ‘disguise’ kurt’s fingers follow the shape of his actual hand beneath it rather than moving like a five fingered hand, it’s such a lovingly consistent little detail 

- magneto and mystique in a breathless race to see who can be the shittiest parent... tune in next week for yet another parental nadir (also some low-poly gambit appearances in this one, for those at home keeping score (me), he’s in the background looking like someone drew him with their eyes closed fakjldfhasd look how they massacred my boy)

- someone please teach the brotherhood boys about consent huh

- jean ‘soccer mom before her time’ grey and her SUV dfhakjlhds :’)

- im sobbing rogue baby girl i’m so sorryyyyyy, this voice actress is so good, my parental instincts suddenly kicked into overdrive hearing the crack in her voice :( (bb me was right tho rogue centric episodes ARE the best episodes. that tension between ‘do I identify witn this character or am I crushing on her?? both???’ now has the fun new addition of ‘oh god oh no you are a baby I want to shield you with my body from everything trying to hurt you’)

- mystique is like ‘so you see despite you telling me you never wanted to see me again I completely disrespected that and posed as a friend your age, manipulated you by offering you the mirage of direly needed emotional intimacy and belonging and added some sprinkles of homoerotic tension to it just to massively worsen your already existing grievous psychosexual trauma and identity issues... out of love’

god go jump in a black hole you fucking monster 

- there’s some very interesting and quite subtle subtext about the people she’s morphing into and what that says about her mental state/how it shows off some of her emotional baggage with the rest of the team. it’s like she’s switching between people/powers that fit the purpose as if she’s going through cycles of fight/flight (and then bursts of freeze where she’s herself, which is... so sad)

- this whole episode is hurting my heart but rogue at full power is undeniably epic  

 - ‘professor x get your goddamn act together and get this poor girl some fucking tHERAPY’ challenge

- SAFE PAPA LOGAN ;_____;

- EYYYYYY opening straight on My Lad, I cannot stop winning!!!!! 

fasdfhsad disintegrating the window with a smiley face... remy I do love you more than my heart can bear honestly, hello may we speak about the fact that his urge to be a little shit is so deep and strong it survives mind control (that little breathed out ‘hiah!’ as he vaults the fence too dsakfjsd)

hahaha and he does up the coat fhsalfdsaj 

- magneto dismissing other telepaths like ‘puh-lease, your Meaningful Looks have got nothing on my ex-husband’s’ 

- :’) rogue and kurt sibling timeees

- say what you want but this pyro guy’s got job satisfaction in being a creepy arsonist with a weird recurring horse theme (well at least twice but still weird)

- I love how beast is the kindest man to ever walk the earth but also straight up savage, this man drags people so hard their ancestors wince in their graves

- gambit taking the time to complete the guard’s game of solitaire -- this episode is giving me everything I want. u little disgrace mr lebeau

and THEN he takes the spider out in the most hilariously bonkers way my heart is so FULL

(I love that when magneto moves by he looks startled and has to quickly move his head out of the way to avoid getting kicked in the temple too that’s a fun detail)

I’m so INTO how this sequence shows off that his greatest strength isn’t even his powers (which are pretty straightforward, really, he makes go boom, longer time and bigger thing bigger boom) but that he’s clever and creative and always extremely ready to be the most harebrained-bananapants-extra-in-a-deceptively-laidback-sort-of-way person in the room (I actually have some genuinely Deep Thoughts about how his whole character does a really interesting thing with having the straightforwardly destructive nature of his powers yield to what his nature as a person is, and how using the playing cards play (heh) into it, maybe I’ll write it out some day. just the fact that he could use anything, but he deliberately chose something that adds style and playfulness and corny charm to it and that also limits the damage of the explosions compared to if he habitually used something with more mass... I find it fascinating how much he’s made a story around himself with it and how deeply it shows he does have a good heart, at the end of the day, in almost a metatextual way. he doesn’t want to destroy things or people, he’s at worst (and best lol) a thief.)

- I honestly have literally no memory of white nick fury (which seems so weird now isn’t it funny) in this series from when I was a kid, he clearly did not make an impression on me lol

- mr wolverine ‘assigned canadian at birth’ x-men 

- oh man I dig the androgynity of x-23′s outfit (even tho they had to compensate with the long hair, which... kind of doesn’t make sense in-universe but does on a design level because it’s a crucial thing that she’s a female clone of logan so yeah okay fine whatever have your arbitrary gender markers if you must haha)

ooooooh that’s actually really clever, they make her gender gradually more obvious as she unravels through the episode and her outfit changes -- first the mask coming off, and then her jacket opening to show her silhouette more clearly, that’s cool!  

- my god what really sets this show apart is how much it invests in little character and relationship moments, it’s just so fucking GOOD! it gives laura looking in on those moments such depth and weight because it’s new to her but established to us as an audience, this is how you make found family devastating people (storm growing bonsai trees is so charming too haha) 

- ooof this is honestly quite harrowing 

SHE’S SO SMALL COMPARED TO HIM I’M CRYING (at least that part of his genes translated over faslkfsjdh short king, I say this with all the love and support of a fellow short monarch)  

- tabitha seems to just be running around doing precisely whatever the fuck she wants and you know what I support her even if she is an asshole her father left her a bunch of trauma and no fucks left to give 

- still thrilled about professor x explaining the spider key fuckup to magneto after the fact like ‘magnus you dumb bitch this is why we split up’ 

- awww kitty has anime and movie posters on her wall and sleeps with a stuffed toy :’)

-          remy                           rogue

                              🤝

doing completely unnecessary parkour around the brotherhood living room seemingly just for the hell of it... I’m not saying soulmates but fucking soulmates 

- fhsadkjlfhsakjldfhsadjkfhsdajkfh just as gambit’s soul-level need to be a little shit survived his bout of mind control, rogue’s deep and urgent desire to kiss gambit full on the mouth survived hers I can’t breathe

she looks so pleased with herself too GOOD FOR YOU GIRL at least get something out of this other than more trauma 

also not only the fact that he’s smart enough to figure out what’s going on (though he’s only partially right about who’s behind it. I do so enjoy gambit/mystique deep and sincere antipathy as a constant across all universes tho lmao pure wlw/mlm hostility) but also that he keeps fending her off like he’s not trying to hurt her even though she’s in nigh on unstoppable and invulnerable terminator mode... awww 

- gambit having absolutely no patience for wolverine and sabertooth’s bullshit macho-off and consistently being this little biker trio’s one brain cell is adding years to my life with every passing moment

his voice is a little different in these scenes too, a bit softer and less like he’s trying to impress someone, it’s nice

- hank: well I barely recognize any of these (completely made up) ‘ancient egyptian hieroglyphs’ but from what I can make out -- *proceeds to infodump a perfect coherent narrative* fjdhfak  

listen this whole thing is such nonsense on so many levels, I’m just turning my brain off so I won’t have to think about it okay, the compulsion to put ancient aliens in egypt haunts us as a culture 

- I am CACKLING about gambit in the snow after having to listen to these two chucklefucks ooze testosterone at each other for hours

he started out taking it in good cheer and is now reduced to ‘dieu would both of you just jump off this fUCKING mountain please’

- ah. a little oops-a-daisy there, we seem to have unleashed the apocalypse. please stand by (they really don’t pull their punches with the season cliffhangers in this show haha)

- opening the season on gambit’s merrily grinning face is the easiest way to gain my favour. yes good this season may commence 

baby u r my

 ANGELLLLLLLL

(he’s so cute here tho haha I think it shows the design isn’t unsalvagable, just get him better hair and stubble more like logan has and you’ve basically got it) 

love his exasperated eyeroll when the dude gets spooked (by his eyes? or just the general weirdness?) too

he’s just trying to keep this crazy family of evil mutants together and unmurdered by one another until they’ve managed to avert the end of the world, bless him  

- oh NO rogue’s LIP wobbles my hhhhhheart ;____; such a good animation detail to put in

- like... I know kurt is just a sad scared teenager with a lot of shit going on and all the adults are too busy averting the end of the world to help him... but buddy maybe don’t ask your sister to wake her abuser (who forced her to kickstart the end of the world!!!!!) when she feels utterly unsafe even with her statue version around huh

- ...wanda is good and I want only good things for her. and for her dad to be disemboweled for what he did to her both the first time around and when he forced her to forget I mean what 

- magneto throwing an epic satelite-slinging tantrum b/c ‘no I am the biggest sexiest strongest mutant of the pack :(’... erik fucking get over yourself 

- yes boys absolutely go along with a plan suggested by a dude who looks at you like this 

nothing bad can come of this surely asdfkhsa

- lance’s quarter of a braincell always trying to go ‘hey wait, maybe... not do this???’ and it never helps lol

- in this episode: Logan Has A Bad Day 

...some very specific bondage positions he’s held in here, I am sure this episode awakened something in someone once upon a time lol 

- logan shielding x-23 with his body... im fine it’s okay I’m not crying don’t look at me

- afsdhlsdfjasdlk those sure are some ‘scottish’ accents flsadkjhkdsjahfsd

- scott relieved to finally be able to cede the position of ‘charles xavier’s least favourite son’ to someone else fjsaklfhsajd (poor scott it’s not your fault honey)

supremely cowardly to suggest there is an ex-wife involved rather than charles slutting his way around the british isles back in the day but okay

- kurt with a cold is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. it’s okay kid it’ll get better soon

- ...is there an implication here that professor x is naturally blond. because I am losing my entire little mind about it (i mean he at least has to carry the gene, as does this lady?)

ETA: upon doing some research into this I can indeed confirm that charles xavier does seem to be naturally blond, and after this knowledge I will never be the same 

- “listen, dracula” fskdafghasd oh scott you sweet baby angel I love you

- I know jean’s abilities are a bit ‘as strong or as weak as the plot needs right now’ at this point (so you can have the setup for what’s going to happen with them eventually and she’s basically invincible ;____;), and normally I’m cool with it but god I want her to just squash lucas like a little bug

- ewwwww please don’t ever say ‘daddy’ like that again

- ...what the fuck is even going on this episode’s a mess 

like okay the split personality thing could be something but the way it’s done... what just happened lol

- MY BOY EVAN IS BACK! with a real glowup too (...though kind of weird how he suddenly looks like a grown man)

- augh scott’s eyes are so pretty oh my god ;__________________________;

- that episode in the first season where evan makes the ‘this is my new family!!’ video is so sad now (also, again, his poor poor parents) 

- time for: life affirming road trip with gambit (involuntary) faskljdfhaskjd

stunt therapist remy lebeau 

- I mean the way he goes about it is batshit insane and it’s very much secondary to what he’s actually up to but this is the first time rogue’s sounded genuinely hopeful and confident and like herself in like a season <3 

- he is disconcertingly pleased about her nearly throwing him off the train, and may I just say I agree it’s so nice to see rogue with her old fire back 

- the first time I watched this it was of course dubbed into norwegian, so I had no idea either of these characters were southern lol (though to be fair I probably wouldn’t have had much context for what it meant exactly either, I was like ten at the time and not too interested in america) I seem to dimly remember the norwegian voice actor did a little more of a ‘french’-tinged accent for gambit all over tho haha  

- you know what respect where it’s due, pyro dude knows to live his life for the lols and one has to admire his sociopathic dedication to it

interesting that he, too, seems to have fucking hated magneto -- I wonder if the implication here is that he kept all the acolytes in line with blackmail or by keeping something/one hostage? (except sabertooth maybe he’d just have to say ‘you get to fuck shit up and fight wolverine’ and that’d be enough)

- fsdakfhsd he’s so focused on her he doesn’t notice that guy about to hit him fkafhsa 

- fuck everything else except whatever the hell these two’ve got going on

- it’s weirdly cathartic to have rogue have a conversation with someone who was not happily adopted as well, I don’t think kurt like. gets it because his parents loved him unconditionally and still do 

birds of a feather motherfucker  

- fun detail: when the x-men team are on the shore and logan is sniffing around scott is stepping in something and trying to wipe it off his boots in the background

- when he wakes up after passing out from the touch he’s smiling even though she’s standing over him looking like the rage of god outlined by the moon fsajfsa well the last time he passed out like that it was from a kiss, maybe he still has some hopes and dreams in that direction lol (also he recovers from the tumble down the hill first and is checking on her before accidentally brushing her cheek with his hand, which I thought was sweet) 

and it was in that moment he knew he fucked up *passes out*

- ‘I can explain’ can u remy. can u  

- did it ever even occur to you to just. ask her. to help you. I mean I know it didn’t but like rogue’s always one second away from throwing hands with some bully and is stupidly ride or die, if you’d given her the puppydog eyes she would have crumbled immediately (fair enough I guess this entire episode is telling us he’s not from a background where he has much experience with people just helping him without a price haha) 

- his eyes glowing when he’s angry or upset or using a lot of his power is undeniably cool as all hell. I’m just saying it would be Big Sexy if they sort of flickered with light in moments of genuine vulnerability okay  

- his coat... his coat is what makes the Silhouette tm and I could not be happier about it 

- another parent of the year contestant enters the running lol “hey remy have you ever considered that you’re more of a walking bomb factory than a person? that’s certainly how I think of you hahaha c’mon kid let’s go” 

- the running joke of jean luc getting dollar signs in his eyes seeing the other mutant powers and gambit being like ‘nO!!!!’ and pulling him along is amazing haha

- from the way he looks when he touches rogue accidentally and the way he talks to his dad I’m sort of getting the feeling this gambit might actually be a bit younger than he looks?

here too -- idk why but it’s making the ‘wait is he baby???’ alarms go off in my head haha. very early twenties at most. 

- and we’ve officially seen him with all the face cards in the heart suit folks! (yes this is the sort of thing my brain notices no I don’t know either)

- poor logan running his ass off this whole episode in a panic and then she’s like ‘nah he’s fine (in several meanings of the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ) please put him down’ hfaskfsda

- rogue without makeup!!! her eyes look so naked like this haha <3

- oooh here’s a really interesting thing that tickles my brain a bit in this specific part of the scene where gambit frees his dad -- the part where he’s leaning against the door frame waiting for jean luc, who’s about to suggest using the opportunity to ruin the rival gang from the inside rather than slipping away while they still can

from his expression here he knows what’s about to happen, what jean luc is about to say, and it’s clearly a ‘man who thought he’d lost all hope loses last additional bit of hope he didn’t even know he still had’ sort of situation. he KNOWS what jean luc is like, and it still hurts that he really, honestly can’t give him even this, can’t appreciate that remy’s already done all this shit for him when he extremely didn’t have to, without immediately (no really, it took him less than ten seconds to go there? jesus) demanding more.  

remy tells him “I’m just here for you” and jean luc does not understand it. remy seems to be sincere in this motivation -- rogue certainly thinks so, having experienced it second hand and found enough at least emotional merit in it to decide he was worth saving even after all his bullshit (lol a bit of a running theme maybe. I think it’s very telling that after she absorbed mystique she was like ‘what the FUCK you’re a fucking monster’, and after she absorbed gambit she went ‘you did the wrong thing for the right reasons’ after she got over the first wave of outrage) 

there’s also what he says as he stands there: “You don’t need me for that”, with the distinct implication that jean luc would only keep him around because he has a use for him and for no other reason -- and then jean luc shamelessly doubles down on that by specifying that it’s not even him he’s got a use for as such, just his powers. that’s some kicking puppies level of deliberately missing the point, it’s almost impressive in how cheerfully mean it is haha

this idea of using people is really important in this episode because remy’s doing basically exactly the same thing to rogue to begin with; it doesn’t really matter to his plan that it’s her that’s with him through this, just what her powers are. (I think it’s  p r e t t y  solidly implied that he does actually like her a lot outside of that too and maybe there is some comfort in having her around for this, but mostly he’s behind a smokescreen of lies through the whole thing sooo I doubt he’s even aware of it, honestly)     

but then it does matter that it’s her when she comes back for him, even after what he did. and unlike jean luc he understands what that means, that she did that for him, and that she didn’t have to. and instead of asking her for more, in return he gives her the thing it’s been established is what he considers the most valuable thing he has; his ‘last card’, the thing he’s credited with keeping him alive many a time, basically. it’s gone from using to mutuality, a tentative place of friendship, and at the end of the day he is a different man than his adoptive father, with a capacity for selflessness and love he lacks. which is of course some of the same stuff going on with rogue and mystique too, except rogue acted from a more fragile and unstable place and did something she regrets, or at least has a LOT of doubts about now, and she found some catharsis in helping someone make a different choice in a similar situation. man there’s some Stuff going on under the surface here haha

(by the way it’s a weirdly... meaningless yet intensely meaningful thing, the gifting of a symbol? of an idea? but he’s putting something very crucial of himself into her hands, is the subtext, and he expects her to understand, which she also does seem to do. at the beginning of the episode he’s proving that he’s seen something true about her -- “You’re such an unhappy girl”, knowing where she comes from, the way she’s mourning her lost confidence and autonomy with her abilities -- and here she’s proving she’s seen something true about him. :’) I wish this show had gone on long enough for this dynamic to progress, it’s really interesting and touching)   

- gambit dragging himself up onto dry land seeing someone approaching (to help?!): :D

gambit seeing that it’s logan and the look on his face: D: 

- rogue using her powers so confidently and fearlessly in this episode tho!!!! 

- *me crying* and then her FAMBILY comes to take her home and he says he’s looking out for her too and kurt still loves her even though they’re having a conflict thing between them and she’s finally able to use her powers without so much fear again and --

- ...did I just watch some baby lesbian love at first sight shit right now???  

- okay last two episodes let’s go

- HELL YEAH STORM (I love that she’s like ‘don’t give me a dumb order like that and I won’t have to disobey it’ too sdfjsaj) her voice has such command I’m usually very much not the ‘step on me’ type butttt

- y’know I feel like apocalypse’s main fault across all versions I’ve seen of him is that he’s like an immortal superpowered god king and he’s not even sexy. like at least make him hot if he’s going to be insufferable in every other way 

- also callout post for apocalypse: one time he made gambit into the Horseman of Death... and didn’t even make him sexy!!! you were handed remy lebeau, supreme bi disaster slut of the x men universe, and you couldn’t even make his brainwashed superpowered evil side hot?? a beautiful stubbled twunk with glowing red eyes and extremely charming :> face practically delivers himself into your hands and you do that to him???? I mean I’m sure apocalypse did some other bad stuff too but that was the worst one

(comics are so dumb y’all) 

- having to watch jean cry is emotional terrorism!! ;___; she has such older sister/mom energy, whenever she gets sad and helpless it hurts 

- oh, OH so PROFESSOR X you’ll make into a hunk and ~*strategically*~ rip his clothes to show off a nipple and a flawless pec in a way that makes me extremely uncomfortable because he’s like The Dad??? apocalypse you are rotten to the core this is unforgivable 

- so wait wanda never actually gets her real memories back. what the FuCk I hope that was a dropped storyline because they ended the show tragically prematurely rather than like. the plan

- why is spyke calling storm ‘storm’ show that’s his auntie o!! >:(

- as a society we need to acknowledge that apocalypse looks like a fucking clown

- ooooh yeah I have been thinking that this show’s greatest visual weakness so far has been not having a visual way to show telepathy/battles of the minds, but this is a pretty cool way to do it! better late than never

- I’m so happy rogue gets to end this herself, since she was forced into starting it against her will, it’s just nice and neat storytelling

- YEAH FUCKING TELL HER KURT AND ROGUE I AM SO PROUD OF YOU and she has the temerity to look pissed off oh my god

the only valid thing mystique has done in her entire life is be in love with destiny. literally everything else she gets up to is a travesty. like I know objectively she’s hot but my loathing for her stops me from even appreciating it. I do enjoy loathing her tho so please don’t change her haha

(a bit odd to have kurt’s attitude to her swing so much but I’m just going to assume he and rogue had a good long conversation after ‘cajun spice’ and that he understands what’s going on better now)

- this last part is such a cruel tease faskdfhsdaj ‘here are all the cool-ass things we had planned. sucks you never get to see it huh’ im devastated 

- magneto without his helmet and playing charmingly with children like charles is going ‘well at least I saved my marriage finally’ fsadkhfjsd (honestly tho I would be super interested in seeing how they’d redeem this magneto because he’s been a real bitch the whole time lol) 

there’s an interesting thing here where magneto looks down at wanda as the last thing he does on screen before this epilogue part (yeah I hope it fucking haunts you forever what you did to her erik you absolute piece of hot garbage) and the last thing charles does is look at jean b/c he knows what’s going to happen to her and it breaks his heart... Dramatic Parallells  

- just the hint of jean as the phoenix has me in full D:D:D: mode tho maybe I wouldn’t have survived it

- gambit in the last groupshot with his arm around rogue ;^) I mean I’m sure they’re headed for some turns and roundabouts along the way but what’s that thing she says as her wedding vow, that she’ll always find her way back? anyway that got me in my heart

- man I really wish this show had been given more seasons, we were barely even getting warmed up here :’(

[lallyloo]

It’s Complicated

(This was just supposed to be a short little thing but it kind of got away from me..)

By the time the 3pm video call happened, Spencer had already talked to his parents. They were old hippies who didn’t know how to Zoom, so they just called from their landline. Brady stayed on his bunk while the phone call happened, trying to mind his own business, but he heard enough to know that Spencer’s parents really wanted him to come home, quarantine be damned, and they spent most of the call arguing. Spencer tried to tell them that even if he could come home it was too late to travel, and it was safer for him to just stay at school anyway.

The call ended quickly and Spencer suggested drinking after that.

They did a few shots before connecting to Brady’s aunt’s Zoom call, and when they did introductions he called Spencer his roommate. It was technically true, but it felt like there should’ve been another word for it – and Brady wasn’t sure yet what the word might be.

They fooled around a lot. Got naked together. Jerked off. Sometimes if they got too drunk they spent a lot of time kissing. Brady liked that a lot. Sometimes they’d wake up cuddled together on the same bunk and Spencer would slick himself up and fuck Brady nice and slow.

Sometimes Brady felt like he loved him.

They never really talked about it, and Brady wouldn’t say Spencer was his boyfriend, but he also wouldn’t say he wasn’t. He didn’t like to think about it too much. It was complicated.

So ‘roommate��� was the word he went with.

They’d put their masks on earlier in the day and managed to socially distance their way across campus to a little convenience store. Brady had been searching the freezer when Spencer came up beside him with his arms full of snacks.

“Dude,” Spencer held up a box of Ding Dongs, with his hand over the word ding. “Check it out – dongs!”

Brady laughed and high-fived him. It was stupid, but sometimes Brady liked stupid.

They bought the snacks and Ding Dongs, along with some frozen TV dinners and a tub of ice cream. They’d both been hoping for pie, but they knew it was a pipe dream when they were getting their Thanksgiving supplies at a campus convenience store.

When they got back to their dorm room, Spencer tried his best to shove the ice cream in the frost-coated freezer of their mini fridge, while Brady read the instructions on their tv dinners so he’d know when to start cooking them.

Spencer’s phone call happened shortly after, and then Brady was breaking out the vodka and trying to distract Spencer with a drinking game. Spencer suggested the Thanksgiving theme and they did a couple shots before the Zoom call, just to get themselves loosened up a little.

When the inflection in Spencer’s voice changed and he went a little nasally, Brady knew the alcohol was kicking in.

Just before three, Brady went down to the common area and put their dinners in the microwave so they’d be ready in time to join the family. He was a bit nervous about bringing Spencer to dinner, but a bit excited too.

When he got back to the room Spencer was wearing a dress shirt and his fake leather jacket.

“Dude, you dressed up?”

Spencer glanced down at his outfit. “Gotta make a good impression, man!”

“You obviously haven’t met my family.”

“I’ve seen your mom on your computer.”

“Yeah, so you know she’s nuts.”

Spencer shrugged. “She’s still your mom. I gotta make a good impression.”

Brady wasn’t sure if Spencer was forgetting the shot glasses and the fact that they planned to get completely shitfaced over dinner, but he didn’t have much time to think about it because the clock in the room said 3:01 and they were already late.

Brady set the TV dinners aside and quickly joined the video call. Spencer sat down a few seconds later, sliding in beside him in his pleather jacket, and they ended up having a great time. Brady’s family was ridiculous enough to encourage several more shots, and they got good and drunk while they ate some hot food. It was nice. The food wasn’t much different from their terrible cafeteria food, but somehow eating it together at a family dinner made it taste better.

Brady was feeling a little sappy by the end of it, and he was sad to miss out on his mom’s pumpkin pie, but watching Spencer smile at him from beneath an ice cream mustache seemed like an okay trade-off.

When Brady finally logged off and closed his laptop, they were both drunk and full and happy.

“You wanna lie down?” Spencer was looking at him with heavy eyes.

Brady nodded. “Yeah, dude.”

Spencer slipped off his jacket as they made their way to his bunk, and as soon as he was lying down Brady crawled in beside him.

They spent a good long while reliving the Zoom dinner and laughing about it.

“My Uncle Gary with that stupid turkey hat..”

“Turkey! Drink!” Spencer raised his hand as if he was still holding a shot glass but quickly remembered they were done drinking.

“It was turkey noises, drink.”

Spencer just waved him off with a smile. “Whatever dude.”

They talked about his Uncle Philip and Aunt Diane and Brady told a story about his younger cousins and how one Christmas they nearly set his grandma’s tree on fire.

The mention of Brady’s grandma suddenly had Spencer in hysterics. “Oh man, she was talking about her dookie!”

“Dude. Sick.” Brady grimaced. “Let’s not talk about it.”

When Spencer’s laughter died down he swiped his hand over his forehead, trying to get the hair out of his face. Then he looked over at Brady and smiled.

Brady smiled back at him.

He really liked Spencer but Brady secretly thought that his hair was pretty bad. It was too long, and cut weirdly, and dyed an inky black color which seemed to clash with his reddish beard. Brady didn’t even acknowledge the blue tips. It was just a weird combination over all.

He would never want to tell Spencer what to do or how to cut it, but the alcohol seemed to be making him brave. Or making him an asshole? Brady couldn’t really decide.

“Dude, you ever get tired of your long hair?”

Spencer seemed to consider the question for a moment before replying, “yeah maybe sometimes, like when I’m eating, and when I’m trying to watch tv, and when I’m sleeping.”

“You think–”

“And when I’m in class and the prof is writing stuff on the board.”

“Do you think– ”

“And when I need to brush it.”

“Dude.”

“And when– ”

“Dude.”

“Yeah dude?”

“What if.. like.. what if I cut it?”

Spencer didn’t respond so Brady continued.

“I’m good at cutting hair, I cut my hair all the time.”

When Spencer still didn’t reply, panic started to hit Brady a little. He wasn’t aiming to hurt Spencer’s feelings, but he was suddenly afraid that maybe he had. He silently cursed the stupid alcohol making him say stupid things.

“But if you don’t wanna” Brady stammered, “that’s cool too.”

“Yeah, dude.”

“Like, yeah that’s cool?” Brady asked carefully.

“I mean, like, yeah you can cut it.”

“Are you serious?”

“For sure,” Spencer nodded, pushing hair off his forehead again. “But we gotta wait until we’re not drunk. You got those shaky hands, bro.”

Brady raised a hand up to take a look at it. Spencer was right – his hands always trembled a little but it was worse when he’d been drinking.

He lowered his hand and looked over at Spencer. “Tomorrow?”

“Sure dude, in the morning.”

Brady smiled. “Awesome.”

He convinced Spencer to get up with him and they walked to the communal bathroom together to pee and brush their teeth. It was still pretty early, but Brady knew with the alcohol in their systems and the Thanksgiving dinner they’d both be passed out long before midnight.

When they got back to their dorm room Brady pulled his shirt over his head and Spencer unbuttoned his dress shirt and tossed it on the floor.

“You wanna kiss or something?”

“Yeah, man.”

Brady followed Spencer back to the bunk, and kissed him until he was too tired to keep his eyes open.

Brady woke to the feeling of Spencer’s hand on him, smoothing over his back, and when he opened his eyes the room was bright with morning light.

“You awake?” Spencer asked and Brady nodded into his pillow.

He secretly liked their early mornings together. The inflection in Spencer’s voice was different, softer and calmer, with less of the nasal twang he always had when they drank. Most mornings Spencer’s hands would be on him and they’d touch a bit and fuck, and Brady would happily go along with everything. It was in those moments he thought maybe he was in love. Maybe Spencer was his boyfriend.

But as the day went on Brady would push those ideas away. They were roommates.

It was complicated.

Brady thought back to the conversation from the night before and he really wanted to ask Spencer about his hair, but being sober made it a little more difficult and he definitely didn’t want to risk hurting Spencer’s feelings. So Brady kept quiet and just rolled over to look at him.

Spencer’s hair was pure chaos, a messy black and blue mop on his head, and maybe Brady gave himself away by staring at it, but Spencer was soon grinning at him.

“You wanna get the scissors?”

“Only if you want to, man.”

“Yeah, dude,” Spencer ran his hand through his hair, giving it a shake, “go get them.”

Brady jumped out of bed and searched his desk drawer for the scissors he always used on his own hair. He grabbed a towel from the closet, and a comb, and then pointed to his desk chair.

“Sit there.”

Spencer did as he was told, and Brady draped the towel over his shoulders and pulled it closed over his chest.

For such a chaotic pile of hair, it was surprisingly free of tats. Brady combed through it, brushing it down over Spencer’s face, completely covering his eyes. He needed to see where to cut and how much, and when Brady felt like he was ready he paused to look at Spencer.

“You ready?”

He could see Spencer’s mouth form into a grin beneath the smooth black hair. “Yeah, man, go for it.”

Brady went for the blue tips first, happily lopping them off, and then he surveyed Spencer’s head again. The loss of the blue tips left him with some sort of bowl cut and Brady considered it for a minute before moving around Spencer and snipping away at the sides and back.

Black hair continued to fall as Brady cut, and Spencer sat quietly, and if he was worried about his hair he didn’t say so.

Brady managed to cut the sides short, uncovering Spencer’s ears which he was pretty sure he’d never seen before. He stood in front of Spencer and looked back and forth, trying to make sure he’d cut everything evenly.

Then he nudged Spencer’s knee, pushing his legs apart, and he stepped between them.

“Time for the front,” Brady said, taking a deep breath. “Hopefully I don’t wreck it.”

“You won’t, man.” Spencer placed his hands on Brady’s bare hips and left them there as Brady started cutting.

It didn’t take long, just a few cuts, but Brady went slowly – holding out pieces and trying to cut things a bit jagged so Spencer wasn’t left with a blunt cut straight across his forehead. When he felt like he was done, Brady ran his hand through Spencer’s hair, trying to force it into some sort of style.

“If you put some wax in it I think it’ll look pretty good,” he said as he removed the towel from Spencer’s shoulders.

“Do you have any?”

Spencer glanced up, and Brady’s only response was to stare at the green eyes looking back at him. He’d seen Spencer’s eyes before, of course, but never so clearly.

“Dude, you’ve got nice eyes.”

“So do you,” Spencer smiled. “They’re so blue.”

“Yours are green.”

“I know, man.”

Brady leaned in to kiss him.

It was the first time they’d kissed without being drunk first.

Spencer’s hands strengthened their grip on Brady’s hips, and Brady couldn’t keep himself from touching Spencer’s face. His beard was still wild and scratchy, and it still clashed with his black hair, but it didn’t really bother Brady.

His hands moved lower, sliding down to Spencer’s shoulders and touching over him and when Spencer sighed against his mouth, Brady slid down onto his knees and unzipped Spencer’s jeans.

Brady had seen his dick before, usually when they jerked off or after Spencer fucked him, but they generally didn’t touch each other that way. But Brady knew what Spencer looked like, how long he was, and that he was uncut. Brady liked the way Spencer’s cockhead hid sometimes. He’d always been interested in it, wanting to explore because it was different from his own dick, but they never did that kind of thing, with his face in Spencer’s lap and Spencer watching him.

Brady thought maybe they should start.

He paused before reaching beyond Spencer’s zipper.

“Is this okay, man?”

Spencer just nodded slowly, “oh yeah, dude..”

Brady was slow about it, wanting to touch and look, and he watched the way Spencer thickened in his hand and the slit of his dick peeked out a bit as the hooded skin uncovered it. Brady gripped a little tighter, sliding Spencer’s foreskin down to uncover the wet cockhead underneath. He tried it again a few times, sliding the skin up and over the head of Spencer’s dick and then back down, pulling it taut as Spencer’s cock strained and leaked.

Spencer was sighing above him, “ahh Brady, please..” so Brady leaned forward and took him into his mouth.

Spencer’s dick was slick and salty and Brady licked over him, thinking about the way he liked his own dick sucked and trying to emulate it. Brady took him as deep as he could before realising it made him gag and he didn’t like that much, so he focused on licking and sucking on the end, using his hand to jack Spencer’s foreskin a bit. Spencer was writhing above him, making soft little whining sounds as he gripped the arms of the desk chair.

“Oh god, dude,” he gasped, “oh Brady, please, please keep going.”

So Brady did. He licked and sucked until Spencer was whining and coming down his throat. Brady had tasted his own jizz before and Spencer’s wasn’t much different, and it didn’t make him gag like the deep throating did. He moved his mouth over Spencer one last time, leaving him wet and licked clean, and Spencer leaned down to hold Brady’s face and kiss him.

“Oh man, you taste like me.”

“Obviously,” Brady grinned, “you just jizzed in my mouth.”

“I sure did,” Spencer smiled back, and then he slid down from the chair and joined Brady on the floor.

Spencer gave him a soft push, “lie down.”

Brady laid back and watched as Spencer knelt over him and loosened the ties on his joggers. His dick was tenting the fabric and Spencer looked at it before looking up at him.

“Can I suck you, dude?”

Brady’s eyes went wide. “God, dude, YES.”

He watched as Spencer pulled his joggers down and his dick sprung free, and then Spencer’s mouth was on him, wet and warm. Brady wanted to buck his hips up because it felt so good, and maybe Spencer knew it, because his hands moved to hold Brady’s bare hips again, pressing him to the floor as he took Brady’s cock as deep as he could. Spencer nearly gagged on it, and then he pulled his mouth back and completely away to watch the trail of spit and precum stretch between his lips and Brady’s cockhead.

“Spencer,” Brady gasped, wanting his mouth back, and Spencer moved down again, sucking over him nice and slow.

He’d had his dick sucked before, plenty of times, but Spencer’s mouth on him felt different. Sweet almost, and it gave Brady an odd feeling in his chest. He reached down to touch Spencer’s head, running his fingers through the fresh haircut, and Spencer glanced up at him, his green eyes soft and wanting as he smiled around Brady’s dick.

Brady watched him a little longer, enjoying the way Spencer’s lips moved over him, sucking him a little deeper each time. And when Brady felt himself teetering on the edge, he tipped his head back and pushed his hips against Spencer’s hands as he pulsed inside Spencer’s mouth. Those wet lips stayed tight around him, sucking every bit of jizz out of him until Brady was spent and unable to move another muscle.

Spencer flopped down next to him and after a moment he felt Spencer’s hand reach for his and they entwined their fingers.

“We should do that all the time.”

“Yeah, man.”

“Like, every day.”

“Yeah.”

Brady looked over and smiled at Spencer, and Spencer grinned back at him as he leaned in for another kiss.

It wasn’t really that complicated.

Brady was pretty sure he was in love. And Spencer was definitely his boyfriend.

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

did anyone else feel like everything in uni was just.... too much to handle???? like do this internship! do this extra curricular program! and this one and this one and this one!!!! all to prove how involved you are!!! build all your soft skills and hard skills and professional brand/identity now!!! what are you doing????? dicking around like that????? you have no time to dick around!!!!! DO IT NOW??!!! WHERES YOUR LINKEDIN??? WHERE ARE YOUR AND WHAT ARE YOUR CAREER GOALS AND YOUR CAREER ROADMAP????!!! WHY DONT YOU CARE ABOUT ENTREPRENEURSHIP AND BEING INNOVATIVE???? OH BY THE WAY WHERE ARE YOUR ASSIGNMENTS ON TOP OF ALL THIS OTHER BS YOU’RE MEANT TO DO AND CARE ABOUT????!!!!!

like bro you’re causing me and probably everyone else to have mental breakdowns and feel like failures if they don’t do all these things all at once at uni. sorry i couldn’t manage an internship bc i only got my licence after i graduated???? sorry that i felt like those programs would take too much energy out of me???? sorry i forgot to turn in all those bs personal reflections you wanted me to have done for that extra curricular program that i signed up for where i never got hired for any of the positions i applied for anyway???? sorry i don’t give a fuck about my professional image and how to set up a personal brand i have no fucking energy left to give a flying fucking fuck about it. why the fuck does it even matter??? and fuck your entrepreneurship and innovation/hustle lifestyle bs spiels! why the fuck am i supposed to care about these????? when my mental health is so fucking depleted that i had a panic attack to the point of throwing up in the bathroom over making my linkedin account and being a “budding professional”???? why don’t my studies count as being involved on campus???? because they’re literally all i can fucking handle, just barely???? like how much fucking energy and time do you think i fucking have???? thanks for your fake ass mental health events that don’t really work either. just fuck why can’t i dick around like you’re really supposed to do at uni???? how the fuck else am i meant to relax if i’m always meant to be thinking about hustling and all that bullshit??? hello???? why will no one answer me???? fuck you.

like obvs i know people will react to this with comments such as: “that’s why and how you’re meant to learn time management at uni!!! look at all the cute study hacks on tiktok to help you ☺️!” and “that’s how you learn how to handle multiple workloads and deadlines and stuff!!” or “that’s how college/uni simulates the real world of employment!!! if you can’t deal with this at college/uni maybe you should’ve just dropped out and realised that you needed to toughen up princess!!!” or whatever else. but y’all. like it was chronic. i was always tired. always burnt out. i felt like i had no time to “find myself “ or whatever the trope or expectation of uni is supposed to be. instead i was just hammered, to what felt like death, with “be entrepreneurial and grind/hustle your way to the top every day!!!! only care about your professional image and brand! everyone has one! do 10 internships today to prove your eligibility/validity and motivation to employers so you get into a grad program!!! hustle hustle hustle! innovate innovate innovate! where are your start up ideas to fix the entire world in a day???? here’s all these never ending deadlines for 50+ extracurriculars that you HAVE to meet otherwise you won’t get the award for these programs officially to show employers!” etc etc etc. but it honestly felt like so, so, so much to do and i felt guilty because i felt like i had absolutely no interest in half of the ECs, let alone, even the “required marks” (because more than half of the ECs at my uni required at least a 75 or distinction average) to get into like mentor high school kids or idek do a business incubator program or whatever the bullshit EC program options were.

and that above is not even counting the reflections that you had to do to say “yeah i did this program and i felt it was good and i learnt A/B/C about myself through this program so it’s defs enhanced my employability skills” to even be considered to be taking part in the program. it was all too fucking much on too little time and i fucking hated it. and that’s besides the point that i was focussing solely on all the employability workshops for my “career” and got literally fucking nothing out of them. like why can’t uni just be a time to dick around and find yourself, instead of doing useless fucking employability circus bullshit and hearing time and time again about the “entrepreneurial mindset” and how to “never turn off your brain for innovation and the hustle to be ahead of everyone else???? hurry up and have a side hustle like tutoring to show just how much initiative you have!!!!!” like i just don’t understand how my advanced diploma, my undergrad arts degree, and my albeit short lived and failed attempt at my postgrad degree dont show ENOUGH initiative to employers. i fucking hate it.

and i also i understand that me complaining about this after the fact (and also while i was at uni from 2015-2018/doing postgrad in 2019) can be seen as “oh you were just too lazy to get yourself together and grow up! typical millennial/gen z! too selfish to grow up and be part of the big, bad adult world!” but y’all. there needs to be more down time for students and less of a push to be “entrepreneurial” and all that bullshit during uni/college; so you’re not pushed to your absolute limits at uni til you have a mental breakdown and drop out/defer for a semester or a year. and that’s besides the fact that even in my fucking 3 month breaks at the end of every year i was actually BUYING my texts or textbooks early and doing some of my readings (books) MONTHS ahead of time and MONTHS ahead of even knowing the revised sets of texts (because half the time i bought them so early that i hd no idea that the prof had taken like 4 diff books off some courses and replaced them w/ other books instead for example) so i really had no proper downtime anyway. like i was utterly run off of my feet and i was burnt the fuck out every fucking year of my undergrad degree and also my postgrad and also business college in 2014; which was at least 50+ page assignments every fucking week. like that should count as initiative to employers.... but apparently it fucking doesn’t??? im fucking sick of y’all what the actual fuck do you want????

[kayr0ss]

Welcome Home

[LWA, Diakko, domestic, family, baby?, cute happy shit]

Akko and Diana are still settling into this new life, routine, and responsibility. But coming home to this...? It was the best thing that ever happened to them.

—–

Diana clicked at the button of her retractable pen, eyes moving rapidly from left to right and back again. She paused, humming softly to herself while she appraised yet another essay on how ‘the advent of big data and analytics is a turning point in the synthesis of magic and artificial intelligence technology. She scribbled her remarks on the paper’s margin:

‘Revise – provide suggested guidelines and security measures for magic-infused data-driven machinery.’

Now, it may come as a surprise to many, but Diana never really considered herself a traditionalist. In fact, her on-going tenure at Luna Nova’s higher-education learning center is heavily decorated with progressive and future-minded research and perspectives. This idea, however, simply sounded a little too much like… Croix—and she wasn’t going to pretend that kept her at ease. But Diana also believed that very few people fall far beyond redemption, and Prof. Croix’s appointment as the Head of the Magical Engineering Ethics Board was the perfect example of redemption if there ever was one.

‘As we’ve learned historically, aggressive technological progress should be done under the guiding hand of ethics and humanitarian agenda,” she jotted down. She spared a quick glance to the office clock her before diving back down into the paper.

05:17:PM

Still early, she thought to herself, I could probably finish this stack before going home and—

“Quarter-past-five!” she suddenly exclaimed, forgetting that her former working hours of until well-past-eight were no longer applicable. Recent events had turned her entire world… upside-down.

“Grading will have to wait until tomorrow,” she hurriedly—but meticulously, of course—tidied the papers into her drawer; the pile on the left for marked papers, and unmarked papers on the right. Her keys jingled while she put her belongings back into her handbag, and the hurried clacking of her heels signaled the other professors of her early retreat back home.

--

Diana Cavendish rarely rolled her eyes, but by Jennifer the traffic was horrendous on the north-bound lane. Which she wouldn’t even be on, had she not forgotten the towels she was supposed to buy earlier in-between lectures. Akko reminded her thrice that morning (each time answered with an obedient, “yes, dear.”) Diana was once again reminded that one of the most surprising—and amusing—things she discovered since her marriage to the brunette witch was that between the two of them, Akko was ‘wife-zilla’.

06:13:PM

And there was extra-emphasis on the ‘zilla’ part lately. Traffic be damned, she was going to get those towels.

--

“Eep!”

The sharp whistling of a boiling kettle startled Akko out of the sports magazine she was so deeply engrossed it. Shit shit shit—she clumsily shut the glossy pages closed, darting towards the kitchen and—kami-sama, why did Diana think it was a good idea to have doors everywhere? “Stupid door,” she groaned, anxious to silence the whistling lest it disturb their special guest.

She lunged towards the stove, snapping the burner knob closed. “I could have done that with magic,” she flicked herself on the forehead, old habits from a magic-less childhood kicking in during the oddest moments. She blinked, scanning the kitchen counter for a small box before realizing that she left it back at the living room. “I’m almost as bad at this as I was at transmutation spells!”

About five minutes later, she was jogging back towards the dining area balancing a warmed tumbler in one hand, and several plastic utensils in another. She narrowly avoided tripping over the carpet (“Fuck!”), and was unfortunate enough to hit her shin across the low coffee-table, warranting an impressive parade of crisp, native-to-Japan curses. Thank Kami-sama it was Friday, she thought with relief. Diana would be taking over evening household duties by Monday and she damn well needed a break; even if a break meant more hours working.

She tipped the warmed tumbler over and let a few drops of its content spatter at the back of her hand.

06:37:PM

It was still too warm but should be just fine by dinner time.

--

[Capitalism is a predator, but I’m nearly home.]

Diana hit ‘send’, letting her wife know that she was around 2 blocks away while waiting for the last stoplight to turn green.

[As long as u got the towels lol. Tnx, luv u :-*]

Diana smiled at Akko’s reply, turning her attention away from her phone screen when she saw the soft glow shift from red to green. Yes, she had the towels—and maybe a full set of Reuven-Eilhart designer night pajamas. Or three.

She also brought home new ‘friends’—she saw that the store had recently released a set of ‘We There Bears’ themed products. Diana remembered Akko raving about them; they were apparently quite the in-thing as of late. She was immediately drawn to the pure-white polar bear with an interestingly unreadable expression. “That un’s ‘Nice Bear’,” the clerk supplied. “But if y’gonna get ‘im, you gotta get the whole gang else he’d be lonely.”

And so she did—because if Diana ever did anything she never did it half-way done. Frizzly Bear and Fanda sat snugly beside him in the backseat.

The blonde witch pulled up into their driveway, sorting out her belongings before stepping out to unload her shopping bags from the back. She opened the door and couldn’t help but laugh at herself.

“What has become of me,” she smiled, wondering how to bring three bears and several frilly-looking things into their house without painting herself as silly.

06:53:PM

Warm, yellow light flooded through the dining room curtains, and the familiar sound of their car alerted Akko to Diana’s arrival.

“She’s actually home on time,” she remarked to a little fellow seated at the end of their dining table, pulling on an exaggerated expression of being impressed. But Diana’s arrival always makes her smile, so she walks towards the front door so she can giver he wife a hand and—

She paused, taking a strong sniff of something which was coming out of the kitchen.

“Oh, no.”

The pizza! There was pizza burning in the oven! She bolted back towards the kitchen for some damage control, relieved to find that the pizza was only beginning to blacken at the crusts—easily salvageable.

“Mou, Diana’s gonna give me an earful,” she whined in defeat. She could hear the sound of their door unlocking, followed by footsteps through their dining area and the rustle of shopping bags being unloaded.

To her surprise, Diana had no drop of sternness in her voice. “I’ve missed you,” she cooed.

Akko broke into a grin, turning to face Diana. “Missed you to—”

She bit back her words, fascinated at the sight of her wife, looking weary from a long day, cradling their beloved Sara with all the fascination in the world. Their daughter giggled up to her mother, hands reaching for her face, prodding at Diana’s nose (which scrunched up adorably) and pulling at her platinum curls before squealing in delight.

“I may have missed you, as well.” Diana teased, tossing a smile to Akko’s direction.

“That’s hardly fair!” Akko tried to pout, walking towards the two people she loved most in the world.

Diana nuzzled against Sara’s forehead, running her fingers softly over the thin patch of light-brown hair beginning to grow longer. Sara perked up immediately when Akko came into her field of vision.

“I think she likes me better,” Akko whispered before kissing Diana’s shoulder. She wrapped an arm around the pair and tickled at Sara’s nose.

“Not a chance.” Diana leaned her head against Akko’s, watching as Sara grabbed onto Akko’s finger with a chubby little hand.

“Did you buy her another hundred sets of pajamas?” Akko raised an eyebrow.

“Only three,” Diana tried to hide her defensiveness. “And... several room accessories?”

Akko laughed, “pretty soon we’re going to run out of space in her room. This little lady has got you wrapped around her finger!”

There was no use denying it, so Diana simply rolled her eyes.

“Come here,” Akko smiled. “Welcome home.” She moved up to her tiptoes, and Diana turned her head to meet the brunette half-way for a small kiss. She appreciated the way Akko’s embraced tightened around her torso and warmed her chest; the way it made her family feel so... whole.

Akko pulled back, but Diana chased after her to steal another quick kiss, amused at the way Akko would still blush whenever she did that.

“So,” Diana gave her wife a look, “burnt pizza for dinner?”

“Mou, Sara! Your mother is such a bully!”

--

A/N: Woohoo finally churned another one out! I’m feeling a bit sick, and it’s early in the morning, so hopefully there aren’t that many typos/errors. Anyway I’m doing fine, hope you all are too! I’ve been re-reading Appointments over and over so I can get a feel of the writing style and flow I used to have for it and finally finish the next chapter. I do feel out of touch from how I was back in 2018; so I really need to do a lot of fanfic reading. You guys have any suggestions?

ALSO - meet Sara! Her name means vivid blossoms; it’s Japanese but also western-sounding so win-win for both moms. A homage to ‘Botany’, with the flowers and everything. She was originally meant to be Leia, because I’m a big Star Wars fan, but hey! I saw Sara and instantly thought it was the best fit. Hope you enjoyed. :) [Also, I’ve noticed I tend to switch between past / present tense a lot and I’ll be working to actively fix that moving forward!]

[eldri-sv]

26 - Aizawa

Kaori Shinsou has always been fascinated by people’s minds. She is one of the best students in her Criminal Psychology course at U.A. and - being the lucky girl she is - her professor is not only one handsome dude, but is also working on the case of the serial killer Stain - a case that has been going on for years. As she is about to become Professor Aizawa’s TA during the next term, a lot of other interesting cases start popping up all over the country…

Deep down we both knew it was trouble by design

(Cage The Elephant - Too Late To Say Goodbye)

Shouta Aizawa gave Tsukauchi a long hard look. He really couldn't believe this man sometimes. Sure, he was doing his job well and all, but he just kept having terrible ideas, like waking him up in the middle of the night with a phone call, just so he could head out to a crime scene and have a look at it, when he could just gather the same information from a well-made report. (Sometimes Aizawa suspected he didn't trust people with writing good reports, but that was a story for another day.) Or that thing he just suggested about Kaori Shinsou.

"Are you being serious right now?" Aizawa asked him, pretty sure that he was trying to play some sort of prank on him.

"Of course! I've seen her work on two different cases now and she has been brilliant. Would be a shame to let her waste away at the Hosu City department. Or have her go back to Tartarus next term." Tsukauchi replied. Aizawa pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath.

"Look, I get it. She's really good at this and by all means, she should get to work in a higher ranking job. But Tsukauchi, have you looked at her? That girl has been doing night shift after night shift in Hosu, then she goes to university and then straight back to work. I've seen her asleep in the damn library, Tsukauchi! She needs a fucking break." he explained. Tsukauchi nodded quickly.

"Of course, of course, I'm not saying she should come here and intern with us right away. I'll have to look at a ton of paperwork for that anyway, and obviously she'd have to agree to it. We'd give her some time off, especially during exams. But she'd be able to work on high profile cases, instead of some teenagers burning stuff in trash cans. Think about it." Tsukauchi said.

Of course he was right. He had a very valid point. It would be a shame to waste Shinsou's talent when it came to criminal psychology with her staying in the Hosu City department. She would have much more room to grow if she was interning with and working for the National Police Department.

But Shinsou already had no idea what a healthy work-life balance meant. Aizawa knew she didn't, because he was the same. And while he loved his job as a teacher and part-time criminal psychologist for the National Police Department, he also knew that it sucked getting that little sleep and being under the kind of high pressure that these kinds of cases brought with them.

"I mean, in the end it will be her decision. But I don't think it's a good idea. She's overworking herself as it is. There were several times during the last few weeks when she just collapsed from exhaustion. This already isn't healthy for her. Now imagine Shinsou getting to work for a much bigger organization - she'd work herself to death because she felt she had to." Aizawa replied.

"Sounds like someone I know." Tsukauchi told him with a smile.

"Exactly. And that's why I know she'd get much more stressed than she already is. I know I am stressing myself more than is good for me."

"Well, have you considered that the two of you would be working together? Which means you would both technically have a smaller workload and that benefits both you and her. Plus, that way you can still have an eye on her and make sure she gets some time off, if that's so important to you." Tsukauchi said.

Aizawa had to admit he hadn't thought about that. It could possibly even convince him. But there was no way he'd admit that to Tsukauchi. Thinking about it, he quite liked the idea of being able to work with Shinsou. After all, he had been itching to show her some of the confidential files on the Stain case, just to be able to get her perspective. Aizawa didn't like working closely with people, but he could imagine working with Kaori Shinsou. He sighed. Tsukauchi had already won.

"Well, go and suggest it to her. I still don't think it's the best idea, but in the end it is her decision. And I agree, it would be nice to get her somewhere higher up than the Hosu Department." Aizawa finally said. Tsukauchi gave him a knowing smile and got up from his chair in the school cafeteria.

"Sounds good to me, then. I'll get the paperwork in order and then I can hopefully see her about it sometime next week. I'd like to get her on for interviewing Stain by any means." Tsukauchi replied.

"That would be a good idea, she's been following that case since forever. She's obsessed with it. Anyway, get your paperwork done and then see if she wants to do it or not." Aizawa mumbled.

He still didn't quite feel alright with that decision, but there was nothing he could do either way. Tsukauchi had come to him to test the waters and see what he had to say about her academic abilities. And those were as good as they could possibly be. He had nothing bad to say about Shinsou.

"Oh yeah, before I leave. The two of you might want to be a little more discreet with... whatever it is that's going on between you." Tsukauchi said and winked at him. Aizawa gave him a confused look.

"What?" he asked, not expecting to hear anything like that. Of course he had heard of the stupid rumours, but he had never paid them much mind. To him they were just that - stupid rumours.

"I don't know if there is anything going on between you and Shinsou, but there are rumours. And it is quite obvious that you are... fond of her." Tsukauchi replied. Aizawa was completely dumbfounded by this. He had never expected anyone to bring this up to his actual face. Yes, he was fond of Shinsou. He liked her, there was no point denying it. And there was also no point denying that she was an attractive young woman. But there was absolutely nothing going on.

"I don't know what you're thinking, but there is really nothing going on..." Aizawa started, but Tsukauchi interrupted him.

"Look, I really don't care. I'm just saying this as a friend. People get certain impressions, that's all I'm saying."

And with that Tsukauchi left. Aizawa had no idea how to react to any of that. He had always thought that all those rumours were somewhat ridiculous. There was absolutely no substance to this. But now Tsukauchi had him second-guessing himself. What if there was anything inappropriate between them?

It wasn't like anything they'd do would be illegal, but it would surely be against school policy if they were having an affair of any sort. Especially as long as Shinsou was in his course. An image got conjured up in his mind of Kaori Shinsou in one of her short skirts and her knee socks on, sitting on the heavy oak desk in his office, leaning back, legs spread wide, looking at him with those lascivious eyes and...

Fuck. Where the hell did that come from? Aizawa was trying to tell himself that it was only because of what Tsukauchi had insinuated that he had just been thinking about that, but somewhere in the back of his mind he knew that he definitely had a thing for Shinsou - he had just been suppressing it, because... well, because he was her professor and she was his student.

This was bad. This was beyond bad. How the hell did he not notice how far he let all this get? Those little mind games where he intentionally wouldn't call on her for ages during class, just to see her essentially fighting for his attention, the way she'd almost grow in her seat every time he gave her any sort of praise - hell, him taking her on as a teacher's assistant.

None of that was helping in any way. Maybe he just had to find a way to at least publicly distance himself from her. Try not asking her to stay after class so many goddamn times. That would be a start. Aizawa sighed and took a sip from his half-empty cup of coffee. It had gotten cold. Of course.

"Morning, prof!" he heard a cheerful voice say behind him. Speaking of the devil. He turned in his chair and saw Kaori Shinsou standing there, a lunch tray in her hands, obviously on the way over to her friends.

"What do you want, Shinsou?" he asked, feeling a headache coming on. He was in no mood to deal with this right now.

"Just happened to pass by on my way. I saw Tsukauchi talk to you and you looked kind of shaken. Is everything okay?" she replied innocently. Good God, this was getting worse and worse. Aizawa gave her a glare.

"It's none of your concern." he said coldly, trying to implement the rules he had just set for himself. Shinsou looked like she was taken aback a little and then she just shrugged and gave him a smile.

"Okay." she replied and continued in her way. That smile literally broke Aizawa's heart. It wasn't easily noticeable, but it was absolutely a fake smile. He kept telling himself that all of this was for the best. He really wanted to keep his job and he didn't want to force Shinsou to transfer courses either.

He had no idea how he was supposed to work with her, if she decided to transfer from the Hosu department to the nationwide department. He tried to remember how he was treating the rest of his students, but somehow it didn't seem to translate in any way to Shinsou. She was smart, dedicated and... really fucking hot.

There. He said it. He thought his student was hot. And really, there was nothing wrong about it. She was 22, there were really only 8 years between them. The only thing that was a problem was U.A.'s policy on that. And that's why he had to cut the bullshit and stop being obvious about it.

Aizawa took a deep breath and took another sip from his coffee. With the shock of his new realization he had completely forgotten that it had become cold and disgusting. He grimaced, as he remembered. Only thirty minutes left until his Criminal Psychology class. With Kaori Shinsou in it. Fuck.

He was so used to talking to her about her assignments after class or to have a small chat in the classroom just before the course started. He was used to watching her write down immaculate notes, her sticking her pencil into her hair and forgetting about it for ages, her sitting up more and more when he wasn't calling on her on purpose. This whole thing would be harder than he thought.

With a sigh he got up to get rid of his coffee and hole himself up in the staff room. He didn't really want to talk to anyone right now, not after he had had this weird epiphany. His mind flashed the image of Shinsou's sad eyes at him reacting so coldly before him. He pinched the bridge of his nose. Fuck, this really would be hard.

[damemaladroite]

Almost done with firefight...

So I’ve almost finished firefight by Brandon Sanderson, the second book in the Reckoners series. I feel pretty lukewarm about this book– despite trying to break this book into parts, I still didn’t feel super compelled to read this one. Granted my life has been a bit hectic and I haven’t had a lot of time to spend on reading but I genuinely feel like if this had been as action packed as Steelheart was, I wouldn’t be bothered by this. Steelheart was the sort of book you didn’t want to put down, whereas this one I almost couldn’t be bothered to pick it up.

I will say, that in the last third when Megan rejoins the plot, the book starts to pick up. Megan and David have a really great dynamic that feels pretty atypical of YA. David’s a perfectly written dork, and while Sanderson gives him his cool moments, it never feels like he’s trying too hard because you have so many moments where you just have to laugh at him (my favorite being his insistence that he is not a nerd) Megan balances him really well, she grounds him but at the same time she needs his sort of infectious enthusiasm in her more jaded world. I like their relationship and it’s pretty refreshing at the end of the day compared to a lot of other romances I’ve seen.

We’re kind of entering the endgame here, so spoilers ahead (I’ve only gotten to part 4 so far) * SPOILERS AHEAD *

Even though I’ve missed Cody and Abraham a lot this book, I’m glad that they’re not apart of this plot to undermine David. The whole thing feels messed up on a lot of levels.

Part of me wants to say it’s the powers that are warping the Prof (Honestly, at this point I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up being the big bad of book 3) but I feel like it’s something else. David’s belief that Epics can change and be good is something that Prof obviously used to really believe in, and he views it as a dangerous route to go down, so he travels as far from it as he can. David’s insistence on studying the weaknesses and that Megan is innocent strike to close to that, and I feel like this is where a lot of the issue comes from.

Then there is Megan, who Prof distrust’s a lot, even though as David points out, Prof still doesn’t have the whole story. Megan’s not someone who has a history of violence like other epics, though Prof definitely strikes me as the sort of person that once you break the trust, it’s pretty hard to regain. And yet it feels too much like he wants a reason to distrust her, and isn’t really giving her a fair shake. Arguably David is doing the same thing, he is too trusting, but Megan’s actions are questionable enough for me to at least consider what she is saying (Read: I think that while Megan is still questionable, Prof & co too easily write her off) On the subject of Sam, I find it strange that David hasn’t really asked her about it– and she hasn’t really denied that she did it. It’s definitely strange, but I feel like there is probably more to it than we know.

While I feel like the sort of endgame-setup-plot twist for this book is good, it’s also strangely frustrating. It took over 300 pages for the book to really get interesting (first fight scene notwithstanding) and around 25 pages after that for the David-is-a-traitor plot to kick in. They are both good concepts, but I don’t know if they are set up or executed the best. In fact, while David and Prof have a pretty good scene, every other character gets the short end of the staff here and distrust David way too quickly. Not that it isn’t believable, since they don’t know him too well– but it still feels shallow. 

Like Val (who should be smart) thinks that Regalia somehow set up David, who has very clearly never left Newcago in his life, and literally had a corroborating story about steelheart from his childhood, to infiltrate the reckoners. It’s a huge leap in logic, and maybe she doesn’t know everything about David or she’s too emotional, but it still feels pretty jarring. Exel and Missy also are mad at him but it doesn’t really feel that bad because honestly i’m not that invested in either of them and Sanderson doesn’t spend time on actually delineating how they feel. At least at this point, it feels like a good concept that is rather poorly executed.

And then the prof (and Tia I guess) have the gall to be disappointed in David, even though their whole plan was pretty much setting David up for failure. Maybe this was a test, but it honestly seemed like David failing was something that they expected to happen. After everything they went through in the first book and in the year since then, it just makes me kind of angry. Like, if I were David, I would be pretty angry about everything. While David was not very subtle about still seeing Megan, he’s a teenager and Megan was a former member of their group, I don’t know– I understand why they are mad at him, but at the same time everything he did with Megan was in an attempt to undermine Regalia. Like it’s not as if he was helping supply Regalia weapons (If that was what happened it would have made these events more believable) They intentionally keep David in the dark about what actually happened with Sam, try to give him a chance to confess while making it pretty clear that no matter what Megan is still taboo, and David acts like a confused teenager keeping a secret because he’s dumb and doesn’t always make the right call? It’s not like they are unjustified, but they still used David and it makes their ostracisation of him just come off very poorly.

I suppose the last thing I want to talk about is Regalia and the actual Endgame here. I think the biggest thing for me right now, is despite everything, Regalia is still a huge enigma, and even though Tia and Prof knew her personally I feel like none of them are even close to cracking the puzzle that is her. Watch me be wrong, but I feel like David’s right and that all of the puzzle pieces haven’t really come together, which is why the fact that they are gearing up for the final phase against Regalia feels so… out of place. Compared to the previous book where they had already had a few significant hits on Steelheart, they have almost nothing on Regalia aside from a few of David’s efforts. The certainty that the reckoners operate with that they understand the situation feels a bit out of place, especially compared to Steelheart where the plan was very clearly delineated, and they had already gained a lot of information, while Babilar still feels off in a lot of ways. Everything they have learned at this point feels like it has brought more questions and very few answers.

Also, kind of random, but using the assumption that Regalia thinks David is compromised could kind of work. They could use that as part of a trap I think, but they trust him so little that they don’t even consider that– which I think is where a lot of my issue’s come from– despite being in the Reckoner’s for over a year, the fact that they disregard all of that over a genuinely trippy situation, I don’t know it just makes me mad at a lot of the characters. Like I get that Val is emotional because Sam died, but does it really seem that plausible that Regalia planted an unknown guy who didn’t even know how to swim, with a corroborating story of Steelheart into the reckoners? I mean, who knows if she knows the whole story, but it’s still a ridiculous accusation. I could go on, but I’m mad that the characters distrust David so easily, like if anything it almost feels forced. We also don’t really get anything from say Tia, maybe we will later but while i love the concept of David being thrown under the bus, I feel like the buildup to it could have been better, and if the execution of it could really have been improved. Anyways, I’m probably going to read part 4 tomorrow and we will see if any of my issues dissipate- I’ve heard this book has a good ending so we’ll see. If I’m going to make any predictions, right now I will say–

1. Sam was messing around with something he shouldn’t have and that’s why Megan went after him 2. Regalia is doing this elaborate plot to not only draw Prof out but to force him to use his powers and to succumb to their influence

À bientôt!

[kurtty-drabbles]

Pirate au Redone (part 3)

N/A: Ideas will be used here. I think. Kitty will pirate? Yes, and Maddy will show up as well. Going to be honest. I don´t think we need to see the talk between Emma and Kitty and I want to write this idea before it pops out of my mind.

@dannybagpipesarecalling @djinmer4 @bamfoftheundead @everykurt @muninandhugin

After a long discussion both Jean and Scott menage to council their differences and as Jean proclaims to a more relaxed Scott, they´ll try anew and this time no more Pheonix or Avengers or anything to come between them. And, Scott, still has his reservations about Krakoa - and Scott is one of the few people that seem to notice Kurt´s demeanor over a couple of days and is one of the few who confide with him about Krakoa- can at least, if nothing else, give the benefit of the doubt to the island.

Where are you, Rachel?

This thought lingers in his mind and took some time out of Scott´s initial agenda-not that he cares too much about it, but, he doesn´t like to be idle and Rachel is a grown-up woman and may want some time alone to figure out things...considering her sexuality and who she dated, Scott can safely say Rachel wants an alone time now- and once the man is fed up in pretending to do whatever chores he was supposed to do. Scott Summers leave his room.

Krakoa is a beauty as if your definition of beauty comes with vines, exotic plants-so exotic that Scott can sweat they don´t exist- and an oppressive tone of green. Paradise is another form of prison? Lucifer certainly thought so.

His thoughts on religion are skeevy at best - again, Scott does not care, and if Kurt Wagner shares some of this belief with him. Why he would feel ashamed?- and his thoughts on religion take an ironic twist when Scott halt and looks at the person in front of him and his teeth grith so tight he could swear he´ll break his teeth or jaws.

"Why are you doing here?" Scott asked directly to Mr.Sinister who is smiling all too pleasant. The man still has the same fashion sense and still have this smirk on his face.

"Ah, Scott...you thought you wouldn´t see me again? I was the closest thing of a father in your life...and when I heard you and Miss Jean Grey are trying again...It fuels my heart with joy...do you remember?" he asked with that creepy smile of his, showing more teeth than a human should, then again, is Mr.Sinister human? "do you remember those fun times in the orphanage? You cried but didn´t beg...and you even won in the end...it only proofs that I was right all the time" and Scott´s breath accelerate and he didn´t think twice before taking his visor and blast Mr.Sinister away.

However, the vines creepily climb on the floor and wrapped tightly around his legs and yank on the floor and the impact somehow makes the lasers stop-Scott closes his eyes and it took a minute for him to reconize the sensation and not enter in dispair believing his sight is gone- and his body is unable of moving.

"Scott Summers, you broke the law" the voice that belongs to Prof X answers, yet, Scott notices something off on his voice. "The punishment must be severe...especially as you´re one of my favorites" and Scott almost laughs at this.

Then I don´t want to know what you would do if I wasn´t the favorite.

If Prof X is ready to throw Scott in the dungeons or do something else, well, all Scott can do is gulp and not cry. But, someone intervenes. No, more than someone as he can still hear their voices.

"Prof...this is unfair...why you would punish Scott for wanting to be away from this creepy?" Jean shouts angrily and Scott can see, mentally of course, how her face must be twisted in anger-there´s a difference in an angry Jean and an angry Pheonix and Scott knows this very well- and Jean continues while Storm is helping Scott to stand on his feet.

"Can you open your eyes, Scott?" Storm asked in concern and Scott shakes his head. Nothing else needs to be said. Storm puts his visor back and asks again as Scott opens his eyes slowly.

Jean is not done. "How can you ask for a nazi scientist to be here? I thought this island was supposed to be a paradise for us...not for nazis scum" Jean shouts vexing and for a moment everyone gathers around thinking she would go Pheonix...

She gave up the Pheonix ...there´s no trace of the bird on her.

Prof X smiles and is not soothing in the slightest. "I believe everyone deserves a chance and it wasn´t thanks to Mr.Sinister´s machinations that Cable, your once beloved son or so you once claimed, came to be?" Prof X only walks ignoring Jean Grey as he concludes his thoughts in one final line. "Plus, you would are the one to give everyone a chance...everyone but your own daughter" and then Jean falls from the sky screaming in agony.

Scott goes to her and tries to use his power on Prof X to make him stop- Scott recalls that he did murder Prof X thanks to the Power of Pheonix and hopes he can kill the man again-yet, his power doesn´t work on the man who only shakes his head at this.

Storm tried to use her powers as well-summon a powerful lightning bolt to burn the man in one attack- yet, her powers are useless against Prof X, and Storm is knockdown.

"What a pity...but you two always disappointed me"

And the fates of Scott Summers and Jean Grey are sealed. There´s no more Mr.Sinister as Prof X leaves.

_________________________________________________________________________________________________

Logan is on the beach and is smoking one of his best cigars and is more than happy to see Jean Grey, and to his increased libido and satisfaction she´s wearing a bikini and no Scott Summers- and Logan knows this is meant to be. Knows this is all about making more babies and Logan promises to buy the best beer he can think to thank Kurt for such law- and the man is as seductive as his entire being can. "Jeanie. Fancy a swin?"

Jean shakes her head and holds him. Oh, Logan knew this would happen and smirks thinking he finally beat Slim. Finally, and even mention this out loud. "You finally going to be with a real man" and goes for a kiss.

The kiss is as passionate as his imagination provides, yet, she steps away and speaks in a soothing tone. "Oh, Logan...I never liked you but I thought you were smart than that" and her eyes are burning just like her hair. "You´ll know what is death and the most painfully one..." and Jean is no longer Jean...and Logan is no more.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

A cargo ship is traveling in the pacific ocean and the captain is giving the orders to make sure their precious containment is in order- mutants kids from non-develop countries and many labs and governments would pay anything to put their hands on those kids- and the captain is even dreaming with the huge sums of money he´ll gain thanks to those kids. And damn, he can even view himself in a large mansion.

"Captain...there´s a strange ship...yatch coming to our way" one of his first mates points to the said yacht and the captain rolls his eyes and order to fire at them-he has better things to worry than worry about stupid people- however when one of the crews of the yacht shots a fireball large enough to damage the ship and the other froze the ship preventing it from leaving...it proves how it in deep waters the captain is now.

A woman flies to the deck. The woman has a red vest and one sword. The men didn´t take long to shoot at her, yet, it was futile. "AHH GHOST!" one of them said and the woman smirks evilly.

"Yep, I´m a ghost and I´m a very pissed ghost" and she runs through them using her sword as if it was another limb attached to her body. The rest of the crew surrender and the children were rescued.

"Emma?" Kitty calls not wanting the damn woman in her mind. "The kids are safe...not alright after what they witness, but, alive...we´re taking them to a secure place"

"I trust in your judgment, Kate!"

"Stop calling me like that, Frost"

One of the kids looks at the woman wearing red and asks one of the mutants who is she. And Bobby follows their sight and smiles. "Well, that´s Captain Pryde" and the kids look in awe at the Captain who notices their smiles and makes a One Piece reference.

___________________________________________________________________________________

Betsy Braddock is not easily frightened and maybe this can make people have the wrong view about her. And maybe, Betsy used to like those wrong ideas people had over her- the fearsome woman who laughs in Death´s face- and Elisabeth´s smile can´t reach her eyes anymore nor be anything but an obvious fake. No pleasantries are enough to dissolve the situation between herself and... "Kwannon" Betsy exclaims noticing how their outfits have different color paletas.

Kwannon. The Japanese Psylocke as some used to call-Oh, Betsy knows what people used to call Kwannon´s body and know what they used to call Betsy´s mind as well- and the Japanese woman is putting one foot in front of the other...the motion would be almost funny, if it wasn´t painfully clear she´s not used to her own body.

"Betsy..." her tone is dry as her eyes are fixated on Betsy. "I want to talk with you, but...thinking back and seeing you now. I need you to shut up and listen..." she exhales and continues. "I don´t blame you for what happened to me..." she closes her eyes and touches her hand. "I´d blame you for how you treat my name and my own body. You wear little and suddenly your blade talks and demands blood...I´m not like that and I don´t like that now you´re a white woman...abruptly your blade doesn´t scream blood anymore and you don´t longer dress like a slut..." she completes having a neutral expression on her face.

Betsy can´t ignore her actions. "I thought in assume another identity for myself" is a good explanation for Betsy not for Kwannon.

"White woman. Do you know anything about me? I´m a ninja not because it was cool or sexy, but, because I had no option. I have no last name...I´m a Burakumin, yeah judge by your look you had no idea what this means" her tone is derisive as she continues. "I was an outcast in my own country. The Yakuza one day, saw my abilities and offer me a job...and that job became my life"

"I didn´t know..." Betsy speaks with a heavy tone. "I was..."

"Having fun in wearing my body as a sex toy? Yeah...I know" and Kwannon uses her kinetic blade- Kwannon is not sure if she wants to fight Betsy or to simply see if she still has her powers- and if a brawl was to happen, well, it won´t be now as Emma Frost shows up along with Kitty Pryde.

"Ladies...this is not time to catfight...we better things to do" Emma Frost replied in a regal way as always and Kitty rolls her eyes at such display but speaks again.

"I think we all agree Krakoa is bad"

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Scott and Jean are back to their cabin in the woods-money is not exactly an issue for Jean Grey as she died and resurrected so many times to the point the agency thinks she´s a meme now- and Jean is laid down on the canape still feeling pain. "I´m fine...no, I´m not...but I´ll be...Scott, when Prof X´s power increase like that?"

Scott has no answers. And someone knocks the door and Scott goes to answer and sees Madeline Pryor smiling at him. "Are you real or an illusion?" Scott asks and Madeline nods sagely and slaps his face with a grin.

"Still doubt am I not real?"

"No, is you!"

"I´m not here to fight...I´m here to talk and as much I hate to say this...I need the help of Jean Grey"

[sky-girls]

Driving Me Wild

I think this one is shorter than usual but it’s done and that’s what matters after all this time right? XDD Its also a little more serious than usual but well i had a rough week some feelings sneaked into this. Anyway i very very hope you guys enjoy this!

The Bold Way

“So what comes next, prof?” She asks him between a mouthful of pizza. She is on his house, eating his food and her dad is supposed to come pick her up soon. He has  been kind of avoiding the topic of teaching her how to flirt all weekend and she is curious to know what comes next. If anything comes next, maybe he is done with this whole situation already.  

She wouldn’t blame him she just needs to know what comes now, even if it’s nothing.

“Well we need to keep studying for your math test.” He says after swallowing his pizza bite, like the rich snob he is.

“I don’t mean that, you dork.” She tells him rolling her eyes. “Though it is important, yes.”

“Ah, you mean the other thing.” He says and he seems a little hesitant.

“Yes, the flirting thing.” She says slowly. “We don’t have to keep going if you don’t want, you know?”

“No, no, no.” He says shaking his head. “It’s okay, I just got distracted with our tests and homework and all.”

She just nods and starts picking at the crust of the homemade pizza he made them. Luna sighs. Matteo is always helping her and taking care of her in some way or another and it’s not like she is a bad friend or something but sometimes she wishes she could do the same for him, she is kind of a mess, she is not good at taking care of people and there’s not much she can actually help him with when he has almost everything in life figured out already. But something good she must be doing, there must be a reason he keeps her around, she just hopes this reason is good enough that maybe he could see her as something more than just friends.

“I guess what comes next is the bold way.” Luna jumps a little, startled. She hadn’t realized matteo was still thinking of this.

“And what is that?” She asks.

“It’s exactly what it sounds like.” He tells her. “You just make it very very clear you like this person.”

“How do you do that?” She asks perking up, this one she wants to know.

“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “Pick up lines I guess, telling them they look good or hot or complimenting them a lot.”

She nods, this she can do, she is very bad at pick up lines so she will probs go for some funny ones but she hopes that it works too and telling Matteo how well he looks or how good he is at something is always at the tip of her tongue but he is so egocentric she keeps it all inside she will just have to let it out. And hope his ego doesn’t get too big to fit into his house.

“I can do that.” She mumbles and he chuckles.

“Yes, you can, of course.” He says.

“I don’t know if you are saying this sarcastically or not.” She announces sitting more straight. “But I am gonna do this greatly, spectacularly even, you will be amazed at how good I will be at this.”

“I can’t wait.” He says laughing, but there’s something weird on that laugh.

Day 1

She wouldn’t say she has low self esteem or anything like this but she is definitely not the most confident person on earth either, so just boldly approaching someone and telling how good looking they are to her or how hot she thinks they are how much she likes them is never an actual option. Luna, as most people in this world, is quiet afraid of rejection in emotional matters.

Which is why she rather take this whole thing, at least on the beginning, as something humorous, it’s easier to go with something funny and light than say something honest and see how he reacts, see how weird he might find it or hoe uncomfortable he might be with it.

So by monday morning she has armed herself with a bunch of pick up lines she found on google and is ready to use them.

She is almost giddy about this whole thing, she wants to see how Matteo reacts, this is the closest she thinks she will get to seeing how Matteo feels about them maybe being something other than friends, maybe he will feel flattered, maybe this will help him think of her as something else, she honestly has no idea what could happen but there’s excitement buzzing on her skin as she walks through the hallways of the school looking for Matteo.

She sees him talking to Ramiro exactly where he had texted her he was and a she takes a deep breath to not give in to her giggles.

“Hi.” She says normally and Matteo turns to her slowly but before he can talk she continues. “Are you wearing space pants?”

“Luna no.” He says when he realizes what she is doing but the the way his eye slight up and the corners of his lips lift contradict his horrified expression

“Cause your ass is out of this world.” She says as seriously as it’s possible and Matteo dissolves into loud laughter in a matter of seconds, his laugh fills the hallways and people look a them. Luna can’t help it and starts laughing herself loud and free, and proud too, to be honest.

“You two are the fucking weirdest.” Ramiro says before leaving with a wave. Probably not willing to deal with this so early. She can’t blame him.

“I can’t believe you.” Matteo says wheezing and struggling to breath.

“You told me to use pick up lines.” She defends herself through laughs.

“Not this kind Valente, please.” He tells her and she pretends to pout.

“The rest of the day is going to be very bad then.” She says sadly and Matteo looks at her surprised.

“Please, no.” He starts and Luna sighs.

“But I already learned them I can not use them.” She tells him with puppy eyes and he actually facepalms.

“Luna, no, for real this is the worst.” He tells her still laughing.

“Are you saying you don’t like my pick up lines?” She asks. “I think they are great.”

“You are lying and we both know it.”

“No, i do think they are great.” She says seriously. “Here, listen to this one.”

“I am going to class.” He says and starts walking, so Luna starts walking behind him.

“Are you a parking ticket?” She asks laughing already.

“No!” He exclaims and puts his hand over his ears knowing well that she will keep talking.

“Cause you've got fine written all over you.” She exclaims happily and he she can hear a muffled sound coming from him.

“Go to class!” He exclaims. “Leave me alone!”

“You know, Matteo?” She asks. “if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged”

“This is harassment.” He says  seriously as she turns around. “I’m gonna complain with the principal.”

“I can not believe you don’t like this.” She tries to pout but her smile doesn’t really let her.

“You need better pick up lines, delivery girl.” He tells her. “This are not working at all.”

“But they are pick up line.” She says with a shrug.

“Yes, but the other person will think you are taking this as a joke.” He tells and she sighs. “You gotta be more sincere or at least more original and personal.”

“Okay what about this?” She asks before taking a deep breath, he says nothing so she just goes on, looking straight into his eyes as serious as she can. “You know how they say the eyes are the mirror to the soul?  I think you have the most beautiful soul I have ever seen.”

He stays quiet looking at her and she has no idea why or how, she knows she has been silly , she know she has been weird and maybe he is just thinking how bad she is at this, how dumb she is and how this is a lost cause maybe he is trying to find the words to break it to her and not be mean in the process.

“Yeah, that’s better” He says clearing his soul. “But pick up lines are seriously not your thing, Luna.”

She nods and says nothing as they keep walking to class. He doesn’t say anything either until he says goodbye when leaves her on her classroom.

⭐

The rest of the day passes normally but every day she is questioning more and more what this really is. The thing is that even after all of this, even after Matteo is supposed to be teaching her how to flirt and showing her sometimes their relationship hasn’t changed that much and she has no idea what this means.  A little hopeful part of her tells her that maybe it is because in some way their relationship has always been like this in some way, always playful, always considered, always supportive and that this means something, that maybe it feels something for him too. Other, much bigger much more realistic part tells her that it’s because this is normal for him, that this is how he treats people and most girls even, he is a flirt by nature she knows that and as much as she wants to believe that he treats her in a special way it’s not true, he treats many more people like this and no matter if she is special to him or one of his closest friends this is not reflected in this very particular way.

She sighs, she hates this, she hates wondering and being unsure, she hates not knowing what she really means for one of the most important people of her life, she hates feeling on the fence, so incredibly important sometimes, so incredibly normal  some others. She hates thinking that one day she will see him find someone truly important and special, someone who will get him, who will understand him and little by little she will see how this person becomes something bigger than she is in his life, something better. She believes on him enough to know that no matter what they will always be friends, he will always be there for her. But this idea hurts her in ways she never thought it was possible to hurt before. It makes a heavy feeling fall and settle on her stomach making her feel uncomfortable and uneasy.

She takes her phone and opens instagram needing a distraction but of course as always instagram knows how to attack her and the first thing it does is show her that matteo has posted an story, it’s first of every other, the pink and orange circle around it almost burning her eyes. She hesitates but ends up tapping on it. What else can she do?

She finds something she was very not ready for. Matteo, probably in one of the many boring dinners his parents make him go to, making a very serious face in front of a very expensive looking and big mirror, the camera moves up and down his body, showing his black suit and how well it fits him and then back to his face with those intense serious eyes, it happens, once twice, thrice and with every move she can see how well it fits him, how tight it is on his arms and shoulders and how well he looks in dark colors. Heat pools on her lower stomach and courage takes over her, she quickly types an answer to his story.

“You look really hot in a tux.”

She blocks her phone with hands almost shaking and decides she should go to bed early today, she doesn’t look at her phone again that night.

Day 2

When she wakes up the next day she has no instagram notifications, there’s no texts either and she feels something heavy on her chest, she refuses to open the app knowing full well she would end on her chat with Matteo staring at those little letters telling her the exact time the text was seen and he decided that it wasn't worth an answer.

But it doesn’t matter, she won’t take it personally, she will go about her day normally no matter if this stings a little, or maybe a lot. She will do her best today to act normal and nice and do this flitting thing right.

She goes to school as always and the fact that Matteo texted her to ask if she was awake already eases her a little but not completely, him not answering to her comment and the many thoughts that refused to leave her mind last night have make her unsure and kind of anxious.

Which is probably why she jumps so high when someone sneaks behinds her and pokes her on the ribs. It’s probably why she lets out a little scream too.

“Sorry, sorry, I am so sorry.” She hears Matteo say and she can’t even turn around before he is throwing his arm around her shoulders and looking down at her with sparkling eyes. “You were just so distracted, I had to do it.”

“That was very mean, Matteo.” She tells him, her heart is still beating a little faster than usual and he squeezes her shoulders softly.

“I am sorry, really.” He says still smiling, he has an easy smile today, like he can’t keep it away no matter how much he tries so he has given up and lets it light up his whole face.

She likes seeing him like this, so light , so relaxed.

“You look happy today.” She comments.

“I had a good night yesterday.” He says simply and many ideas that make her stomach turn and twist pass through her mind, she ignores them.

“Well you look great like this.” She says simply and he pulls her closer as they start to walk.

“I do?” He asks and Luna nods.

“Yeah, you look cute.” She tells him and he nods after they meet their friends he lets go but soon enough he is holding her hands.

She doesn’t hear a thing anyone says, she is too busy focusing on the way he is playing with her fingers.

⭐

After the last class of her day is done Matteo is waiting for her, it’s not weird but it’s still strange enough that she is surprised to see him and runs to him, she had good news for him anyway so this just means she doesn’t have to save them until she meets in in the roller.

“Hiii.” She exclaims happy and he grins back at her, the easy and almost smug smile hasn’t left his face all day and she can admit that every time she sees him like this butterflies come alive inside of her fluttering pleasantly on her stomach.

“Well, hello, Cucciola.” He says and she rolls her eyes at the foreign nickname he uses sometimes for her. “You seem very excited.”

“I am very excited indeed, chico fresa. “She says. “And not just because you are here.”

His grin grows even bigger at this, his eyes turning soft, and kind, and happy in ways she doesn’t really know enough words to explain, she wishes he was always like this, she wishes she could always make him smile like this.

She wishes she could tell him how utterly beautiful he is right now, how happy his smile makes her and how it makes her skin buzz and his heart come alive in many different ways.

“Ta da.” She says instead putting a paper sheet in front of his eyes and his happy grin turns into a proud smile the moment that he sees what it is. “Perfect mark, in chem even. “

“I told you you could do it.” He tells her happily hugging her tight. She hugs him back taking this moment to relish on the smell of his perfume and how good it feels to be between his arms.

“I couldn’t have done it without the smartest, bestest personal tutor of all times.” She says when she pulls away, she always pull away first, afraid that he will feel something else on her hugs, find weird that she is holding on for too long.

“Don’t take credit off yourself.” He says his hand resting on her cheek softly. She freezes completely, she doesn’t move, she doesn’t want to do anything that might make him take it away, much less now that he is caressing her skin softly with his thumb. “You are super smart, Luna, don’t forget that.”

She can feel herself blushing as her mouth dries and her tongue fails to work so she can say something, anything. Matteo doesn’t seem to mind though and his eyes stay on hers, his hand stays on her cheek for what feels like eons.

Some other students passing by are noisy enough to distract them and as Matteo smiles at her and moves his hand slowly down her arm and into the small of her back to make then start walking, she needs to remind herself how to breath again.

Day 3

She doesn’t actually notice Daniel at first, she really doesn’t.

How could she when out of the sudden Matteo is sitting even closer to her than usual, his thigh pressed against hers, his breathing brushing her neck whenever he talks and tries to explain something to her. He is so so close and she need to put all her energy into being normal, into ignoring the heat that pools on her stomach and the images that flash behind her eyes whenever she blinks. She puts all her focus on fighting the impulse to kiss him.

He gets closer, so so close and she feels like she is a tiny little mouse, trapped by the hypnotic snake, being eaten doesn’t sound so awful now. Nothing does if he gets just tiny closer.

But of course none of this will happen he will just keep explaining boring math exercise in this low, low voice and she will keep trying to breath normally as she keep crossing her legs tighter.

And then he rests his hand on her knee, is such a casual touch, and he doesn’t seem any phased by it, like he had done it thousands of time before and like his touch is not sending electric signs through all skin, like the way he is moving his thumb right now is not awakening every nerve on her body, like this soft soft touch doesn’t her make her heart skip a beat, and her lower stomach pool with a heat so intense she is surprised, his hand goes higher, just tiniest and the brush of his palm, his course fingers against her bare smooth skin is enough to make her all dizzy, she has pictured this so many times in so many ways. But it won’t end up as her dreams always do, she knows this, because Matteo is completely normal.

She sneaks a look at him and he is still talking something about limits and numbers and he doesn’t seem affected at all while she feels like her whole world has been turned around in just a few seconds. He is just being normal, he has been more touchy since yesterday, he has been happier this is probably just a side effect of that.

Or she thinks so until she realizes that he is sending looks to something, to someone, it’s subtle but his eyes keep being pulled into that direction, she doesn’t notice at first that it is a particular place and not just movement calling his attention.

She looks to the table to where he is looking. Daniel is there. She frowns but Daniel catches her eyes, he seems annoyed about something but he still smiles when their eyes meet. She smiles back, of course.  And suddenly Matteo’s arm is around her shoulders pulling her almost into his lap with how close they end up, she looks at him confused but he keeps acting like nothing is happening. She sends another look at Daniel who rolls his eyes before looking down at his notebook. She pouts and looks back at Matteo.

“Are you okay?” She asks and he just hums. He looks towards Daniel and he smiles, looking somehow smug but why would he?

“I am perfect, Cucciola.” He says casually, his hand now goes from her thigh to her hands playing softly with her fingers as he keeps writing with his free hand and making sure she got her exercises right.

“You are acting weird.” She says softly and he looks at her raising an eyebrow.

“Am I?” He asks and he is daring her to explain more, he is daring her to say what he is doing that is weird,he is daring her to say how this makes her feel, how this affects her, why this doesn’t feel normal to her. His eyes are firm, steady, but still she feels this small hint of mischief and challenge, she looks away, she can’t win this, she wishes she could, she wishes she had the courage to just say it but she doesn’t. So she looks away.

“You are a weirdo.” She says shaking her head, her eyes sneak to Daniel again he seems very unhappy about something. Matteo tickles her softly and she squeals.

“I am not a weirdo.” He says firmly with a small grin growing on his lips.

“Yes, you are.” She says and then softly pokes his nose. “But you are my weirdo.”

The grin takes over his face completely and the way his eyes are sparkling makes her heart beat just a little faster, just a little happier.

He keeps her close through all the studying session and she doesn’t pull away either.

Day 4  

She hadn’t planned on having a nap, not that she usually does it, naps just tend to take her away from the world by surprise and quickly, one moment she is on her phone and the other she is deep in dreamland. But today she was definitely not planning to nap. She was supposed to get home and change clothes and tidy her room and maybe help her mom in the kitchen and she waited for Matteo to come and help her study.

What ends up happening though, is that she falls asleep and when she wakes up her mom is softly shaking her and telling her that Matteo is here already.

She sits up so fast she almost hits her head with her mom’s and her heart is beating fast in that uncomfortable way that it does when you are woken up from a too deep nap. Sleep is lingering on her, on her eyes, on her brain and as her mother laughs hse struggles to put on some shoes and and gather her chemistry books and and somehow finds herself going to Matteo, even if she almost falls down the stairs at least once as she goes.

She rushes and finds him sitting on her kitchen table nibbling on her mom’s brownies, he is still blurry to her. So she blinks once, twice and it’s probably weird because Matteo is staring back at her almost confused.

“Good afternoon, delivery girl.” He says when she doesn’t talk after a while  and she shakes her head trying to get the fog out of her brain.

Her mom seems very amused as she is is putting away the clean plates and glasses and Luna sighs as she sits next to him.

“You seem refreshed.” He says sarcastic and she hears her mom snort as she leaves the room.

“I am sorry.” She mumbles and rubs her eyes. “I just kinda fell asleep so I am just waking up from a nap so I am lostest.”

“I can see that.” He says softly with a chuckle.

“I’m sorry.” She says with a sigh before laughing softly. “I probably look like such a mess.”

“Yes you do.” He says laughing and she pouts. “But messy suits you.”

She doesn’t know what to answer to this, she just blushes softly and looks down with a small smile opening her chem book. He does the same.

“Messy looks hot you.”He adds after a few short seconds and Luna knows that there’s nothing that hits her chest and takes out all the air of her lungs. But it feels like this.

She freezes, she hopes it’s not obvious but she freezes, her sleepy brain can’t really process what just happened, she is too slow, too groggy and to add to the fog of sleep the  the heat that raises to her face and chest fills her mind with what feels like steam.

She can’t think, she can’t do anything. She is rendered a complete and utter mess with just four words of him and she has no idea if he knows, if he knows the full effect he has on her.

If he knows how the smallest, tiniest gesture from him can take her mind and body into overdrive, if he knows how easy is for him to leave her speechless and lost, if he knows that with one look he makes her feel in ways she had never felt before, if he knows that she has felt so much more than she has ever thought possible because of him.

“So have you done any of the exercises yet?” He asks casually and Luna sighs.

He has no idea at all.

Day 5

“I’m almost sad it’s friday.” Matteo comments as they leave the Blake and Luna sends him a look. How can he be sad it’s friday? What normal human being is sad that it’s friday? Especially him, who goes out with Ramiro and has plans and does stuff besides sleeping, not that there is anything wrong with sleeping mind you, sleeping in friday is great. Fridays are fantastic no matter what.

“Why?” She demands, just completely confused. “Do you want to go to school seven days a week now, Matteo? Is this waking up early torture not enough for you?”

“I don’t wake up that late on weekends either, you little lazy lady.” He says bumping her shoulder with his and making her stumble. She sends him a dirty look and he smiles and moves his eyelashes innocently, his stupid very long eyelashes. He is so pretty, she hates it sometimes.

“You are not a human being, Matteo Balsano.” She says shaking her head dramatically, trying to seem disgusted.

“No, I know.” He says with a heavy sigh. “I’m a god.”

The laugh is not intentional and not exaggerated at all, it's just pure sincere laugh and she needs to stop walking to laugh properly. Matteo stops with her of course a pout on his lips and Luna quickly shakes away the urge to bite that lower lip. The way he has been this week is giving her issues.

“You do kinda look like one.” She says through laugh, it comes out almost sarcastic but now quite and he is obviously very confused over the fact if she means it or not. Exactly as she intended to.

“Okay but for real this is what I’ll miss.” He says rolling his eyes and pulling one of her curls softly to annoy her.

“What?” She says battling his hands away from her hair, once he starts no one can’t stop him and he ends up playing with her hair for hours and making it a mess, or even more of one than usual.

“You saying so many nice things about me.” He shrugs. “Giving me so many compliments.”

She stays quiet looking at him confused.

“I didn’t even know you thought so many good things about me.” He says casually.

She looks at him shocked, she didn’t expect this from him and he is kinda joking but also not really and she doesn’t like it. She thinks for a second that it’s an ego thing but no matter how much he tries to hide it Matteo is insecure or he can be, very, very insecure, sometimes he is so unsure of himself, one would never guess it, seeing how he carries himself around, how he talks, how he moves, and a lot of times that bravado that confidence is true but so many others is just a facade, a mask he puts on to make sure people stay at a certain distance. Luna has learned how to look through, she has learned to, not break down his walls exactly, he doesn’t always have them high and indestructible, he lets people in, but she has managed to slip through that door unnoticed by him. And yes maybe this is just an ego thing, maybe he just really loves hearing how amazing and great and talented he is. That would be very Matteo too, there’s no doubt but she is not sure right now and she doesn’t want him thinking for a moment that she doesn’t think the world and more of him.

“You know that I think you are amazing, right?” She asks and he is obviously startled by the shift of the conversation from playful to serious.

“Yes, yes.” He hurries to say, a little uncomfortable. “I was just joking.”

“But still.” She says firmly. “You gotta know that I think you are one of the greatest persons I have ever met, that I am so grateful that you are in my life, that I think you are so talented and smart and amazing and you are just such a beautiful person and sometimes I don’t know how I would manage things without you here in Argentina, you have been one of my main supports and you are always helping me so much, you are always saving me, you do so much for me,I wished I could do just a small amount of that for you and I must be such a sucky friend here if you don’t even realize any of this.”

“Luna.” He calls to make her stop and she does, slightly surprised by the words that rushed out of her mouth. She didn’t expect this level of intensity from herself. “You do so much for me.”

“What?” She asks with a frown. “No, I don-”

“Yes, you do.” He says firmly, resting his hands on her shoulders. “You might not help me with my homework or make sure I don’t get injured daily but it’s obvious for everyone how much I have changed since you came here, you have made me lighter, you have taken a weight of my shoulders, you brighten each one of my days, you have helped me grow into myself more than anyone else, you have taught me how to laugh and be carefree in many ways I didn’t know before, you just make everything better and so much easier and I just know that whenever I need it you will be there for me, that you will always be there by my side cheering on me and supporting me. You help me so, so much just by being you.”

He stops talking and she nods, she has no idea what else is she supposed to do, she feels like she is overcomed with every emotion possible in this very moment, she doesn’t think human beings are allowed to feel as much as she does when Matteo looks at her with those deep, serious, intense brown eyes. She is overwhelmed. She is so overwhelmed.

“So no more saying you are a bad friend.” He says firmly. “You are one of the best friends possible for me and for everyone and I can not let you think otherwise, okay?”

“Okay.” She manages to mumble and Matteo hugs her tightly. She hugs him back on autopilot. Her brain still hasn’t caught up to what he said and her heart is divided.

He said so many great things about her, but the word friend echoes in her chest. It should sting. But it does so much.

She decides to focus on the positive side and tightens her arms around him.

If he loves her like this, does it really matter in what way it is?

[elfnerdherder]

Where the Wicked Walk: Ch. 18

[Support me on Patreon] [Read on Ao3]

Chapter 18: The System of Dr. Tarr and Prof. Fether

           Will was discovered hours later by a boy around the age of ten. Will recognized him almost immediately, from his light blonde hair to his too serious face. He paused a polite distance away from Will –four and a half steps, to be exact –and he tilted his head in such a genuine gesture of curiosity that Will found it amusing rather than off-putting.

           “You’re Molly’s son,” Will said when the boy gave no greeting.

           “Yes.” The boy huffed a breath and buttoned his jacket. It seemed Georgia was going to finally allow it to be cold, and it was a chill that sunk deep. “You’re Will Graham.”

           “I am,” Will agreed.

           “…Mom said that I can trust you. Is that true?”

           Will considered him, from his nicely laced shoes to his raglan sleeved jacket. It looked far too big for him, the jacket of an adult rather than a kid. He wore it with pride, though, that much Will could see. This was a jacket of heritage, of ancestry. At the tattered edges of it, he could sense nostalgia, a boy that worried over the threads of it whenever he was at his most vulnerable.

           “What’s your name?”

           “Wally. Wally Foster.”

           “…Is that your dad’s old jacket, Wally?” Will asked.

           Wally smiled a little and bobbed his head. He turned in order to show off the back, the name ‘Foster’ in a proud, arched cursive.

           “It was my dad’s, but he gave it to me,” he explained turning back around to give Will his undivided attention. “So it’s mine now. It’s my favorite. He played baseball.”

           “What…happened to your dad?”

           “Cancer,” he said after a beat. Will’s lack of disgruntled behavior bolstered Wally, and he sat down on the step that Will’s feet rested on.

           “My dad died from cancer, too,” Will revealed quietly.

           “Really?”

           “Really, really.”

           Wally nodded, and Will noted his fingers sliding along the cuffs of the jacket, worrying at the threads of it.

           “Your mom said that you can trust me?” he asked, and he silently chastised himself for the break in his voice.

           Wally flashed him a grim smile and nodded. “She said…we can’t trust anyone in this house, but we can trust Will Graham. If something happens, I’m supposed to find you.”

           Will focused particularly on that, on her words said in the mouth of a kid. “She said you can’t trust anyone here?” he whispered, leaning in.

           “Yeah.” Wally fiddled more with the sleeves, and he let out a sigh. “She said not even the other kids. ‘Cept maybe Abigail, but she’s not a kid. You and Abigail.”

           “Did she say why we can’t trust them?”

           Wally liked the comradery Will gave, saying ‘we’ rather than ‘you’. His face brightened, and he shifted closer, like he was sharing a secret. “She said they’re not nice people, Mr. Graham.”

           “Just Will is fine, Wally.”

           “’Kay, Will. She said they’re not nice, and they could hurt us if we’re not careful.”

           Will nodded thoughtfully and looked out over the front yard, a brilliant and loving display of hydrangeas and lavender intermingling into a garden of sorts. He wondered if that was five hundred yards, or if his newfound babysitter would start chirping at his leg if he went too far.

           “Do you think that?” Wally pressed when Will didn’t speak.

           “What’s that?”

           “Do you think they’ll hurt us if we’re not careful?” Wally pressed.

           Will thought of the blood down the back of his head that morning in the shower, the way Molly’s hands had felt at the top of his scalp, cold. Her once warm hands were cold, and he didn’t recognize her anymore.

           In truth, he saw more of her in her son than anything else since his arrival at the house. The parts of her kindness, friendliness, and light were all wrapped into a small, neat bow in her son. Will had wondered where she’d hidden the parts of herself that first drew him to her, a lighthouse when his world was crashing around him, and he saw it now in Wally. She made herself a fortress of stone, something cold, calculating, and willing to pull the trigger should the need arise.

           And all of her goodness she hid in Wally.

           “You know what, Wally, I do,” Will said with a quiet sigh. “I think your mom is awfully smart, and you should listen to her.”

           “I try to,” Wally assured Will. “My dad said the same thing.”

           “It sounds like your dad was a good man.”

           “Say, I’m going to go and see if they have a soda,” Wally said, jumping up. “Since…since I’m going in there, do you want one?”

           Will smiled a little and nodded. “That’d be nice, Wally. Only if it’s not too much trouble.”

           “Well, I was going to go there anyway,” he said, and he was up the stairs and running into the house the way only a kid could run when their mother was smart enough to give their kid the truth, but not necessarily the whole truth.

           Which begged the question: if Molly was really in on all of this, why would she warn her son away from the people that she should supposedly view as her family –the one place she could call ‘home’?

-

           Will was approached by a young woman that evening when he was attempting to isolate himself in his room. She stood at the foot of the stairs, wind-chafed and resolute, and he recognized her as the girl that’d first found him after Nate had died, hands bloodied and mind frozen in shock. She’d worried for him, for a breath of a moment.

           “You’re…Will Graham,” she said quietly, and he tensed.

           “Please don’t try to touch me,” he said warningly. He wouldn’t throw her about like he’d done with Matthew, but there was only so much a person could take before they began drawing lines by force. He imagined his hands around her throat, squeezing before tossing her aside, and his stomach turned. Violent thoughts pushed towards the front of his mind, begged entertainment. He blinked and banished them away. He’d been in the house for too damn long.

           “No, I’m…I’m sorry they did that.” Her smile was watery, wavering as she shifted and reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind one ear. “Some people here are…well, you know.”

           “Are you Abigail?” he asked. He thought of Wally, rambling about just who he was supposed to trust.

           “I am,” she affirmed. “I’m sorry to bother you, I know you’re…you’re having a hard time, I just…”

           She stopped talking and looked down, sniffling discreetly behind a hand. She looked to be about seventeen or eighteen, far too thin for a healthy diet. She carried sorrow in the dip of her shoulders, resolution in the set of her jaw as she looked back up at him with intent, blue eyes.

           “You’re not like other people here,” she said at last, and something in her voice made him tense.

           “Is it that easy to tell?” he asked dryly.

           “I heard a lot of people wondering why Dr. Lecter would bring you here.”

           “I’m wondering the same about you,” Will replied, and he rocked back on his heels as he stuffed his hands into his pockets. “How old are you?”

           “Old enough to understand what I’m seeing when I see it,” said Abigail, and she sniffed again and looked down. “Did you ever hear of the Minnesota Shrike?”

           “I have.”

           “That’s my dad,” she revealed, and she glanced up beneath her lashes to study him. “He’s here, in this house.”

           “Well it looks like Dr. Lecter extends amnesty to just anyone,” Will sneered.

           “He killed girls that looked like me.”

           “I recall.”

           “I thought maybe being here would…stop him from that, but…Mr. Graham, it was either them or me, and now that he can’t go about to find them…I’m scared that he’s going to Change me.”

           Will thought of Red Dragon whispering his wants, his need to Change. Farther down the hall, there was the sound of plates clattering, glasses clinking as dinner was set. Abigail glanced from the sudden noise, then back to him, her mouth fluttering before pressing tightly shut. Despite the openness of the stairwell, she was divulging something much like a secret to him, and he softened his voice to recognize that.

           “Dr. Lecter wouldn’t stop him?” Will asked.

           “He would if you pretended to care about it,” she revealed, equally quiet. “If…you pretended to care about me, he’d pretend, too. Enough to stop my dad, should he decide to eat me.”

           Will thought about that, eye-to-eye with Abigail Hobbs on their respective stair steps, although they didn’t allow their gazes to meet directly. He thought of Wally, then Molly, then the reports he’d read on the Minnesota Shrike, the profile he’d drawn up as an essay in one of his classes when rumor had risen that the Shrike had a soulmate. The flash of her eyes screamed her penchant for manipulation, although the longer Will stared, the more he was convinced of her honesty. If he cared, then Hannibal cared. If Hannibal cared, then everyone else cared.

           “Just what are you trying to ask me to do?” he asked at last.

           “Sit with me at dinner? He always sits next to me and touches my thigh while we’re eating.”

           “And this isn’t a magical quest bestowed upon you by Dr. Lecter to ensure that I start participating in the endeavors of this place?”

           She had the grace to smile a little. “He asked everyone to leave you alone, actually. He wants you to come to us on your own terms, but…I just…”

           “You’re trying to survive however you can,” Will realized, staring at the turn of her jaw. He could smell the stench of it, the same as it was for him. They were survivors, something much the same as the other as they tried to survive their lot in life. Rather than submit to her father’s whims, she instead tried to find a way around it, to preserve herself however possible.

           Will could respect that, although he balked at the thought of having to sit down among so many obviously unstable people.

           “Please,” she whispered, and he cringed from it. “I see the way people here look at you, and I…please.”

           “…I’ll do it,” he said, and her shoulders slumped in relief. “Although whatever superpowers you think I’m capable of, I can’t guarantee.”

           “Thank you,” she said, and he was forced to follow her down the hall, towards the formal dining room where people were helping to set the table, their chatter amiable and excited.

           When they saw Will and Abigail, it was even moreso. He ignored the way their heads dipped close together, their faces alight –if they really were unsure of him and his place in the house, it didn’t show with how they looked at him. Perhaps Abigail was right: Hannibal wanted him, therefore they followed through with his desires.

           “Dr. Lecter would want you to sit down there,” Abigail said, gesturing towards the head of the table.

           Will eyed the spot with extreme prejudice before he meandered towards the seat, ignoring the stares pinned to his skin.

           “You sit there,” he decided, motioning towards the end seat.

           “But-”

           “Your father can’t sit on your other side if you’re on the end,” Will said, and he sat down pointedly in the second chair in.

           Abigail smiled and sat down on the end chair, relief oozing from her skin.

           “Thank you,” she said again.

           “Thank Wally,” he grumbled, and when someone swooped by to fill his glass with wine, he managed a grunt towards them, too. The house arrest bracelet chafed on his ankle. He’d have to find a way to get the fucking thing off of him. Maybe take Abigail and Wally with him when he ran.

           Just how many other people were there that were trapped due to the faults and failures of their parents? Their lovers? Their families?

           When Hannibal walked into the room, deep in conversation with Molly, Beverly, and Francis, he didn’t stop in his tracks at the sight of Will seated beside a quietly contemplative Abigail, but he took immediate notice. His gaze flickered briefly over them, analyzing, before a perfectly subtle smile graced his lips and he looked away. His incisors flashed as he seemed to taste the room before him.

           The space beside Will on the other side remained empty.

           “I’m so happy to see you here, Will,” he said as he stopped just behind his chair.

           Will took a long, pointed gulp of his wine.

           “I wasn’t aware that you knew Abigail,” he continued, and the voices coalescing along the table stilled to better hear him.

           Will had a wild urge to say something particularly nasty, what with the way everyone watched the two of them, waiting. He took another gulp of wine, swallowed it down, and wiped his mouth. Just behind Hannibal, a few steps back, a man with a halo of hair, a shiny head, and dagger-like eyes observed first him, then Abigail that sat just out of reach.

           Her father, then.

           “I do. She’s been showing me around the house.”

           “How kind,” Hannibal Lecter murmured. “Thank you, Abigail, for making him feel more comfortable here.”

           “I was more than happy to, Dr. Lecter,” Abigail replied, and it all felt rather forced to Will, this pseudo-conversation when the three of them were more than well-aware that there was something far larger at hand. “He said it may make it feel more like home.”

           Presumptuous. Will gave her a particularly dark side-eyed stare, which she returned with little to no guilt.

           “Dinner will be delicious tonight,” Hannibal Lecter said by way of reply, and he skirted the table to sit at the head of it.

           Without ceremony, the man with the balding head sat down on the other side of Will. He smelled of sweat contained beneath layers of jackets for a prolonged amount of time, coupled with the aftertaste of cold, dry dirt. The turn of his cheek screamed meekness, but the cunning glint in his gaze as he watched Will from the corner of his eye put Will on guard immediately. He thought of the women he’d only ever read about, people whose lives were cut short due to a covetous, hungry need. He’d have liked to have thought he could have seen someone like Hobbs in a crowd and known them for what they were, but it was a lie, something to self-soothe. In reality, Hobbs looked –at first glance –much like the sort of person you’d forget about immediately after seeing.

           Ultimately leading to your downfall.

           “Mr. Graham,” Garrett Jacob Hobbs greeted quietly. He had a well-mannered, salt-of-the-earth sort of speech, quiet and dignified.

           “Mr. Hobbs,” Will returned lightly.

           “I wasn’t aware that you’d met my daughter,” he said, and the way his tongue curled around the title was possessive while maintaining all forms of politeness.

           “She’s been by far the kindest person in this house,” Will said. “I’ve found her to be invaluable.”

           Hobbs had no reply to that. His mouth shifted and curled in on itself, as though it were fighting back the words he desperately wanted to say. A quick glance to Will’s hardened stare made him shift and busy himself with his glass of wine.

           There were no speeches, no pep-talks. The food was set out for everyone, and those that helped to cook it were thanked, everyone friendly and obliging as they patted one another on the back and thanked Hannibal warmly for such exquisite cuisine: paella with freshly foraged mushrooms, cuttlefish, and a velvety red wine to compliment the taste.

           Will picked his way around what he deemed to be a questionable and therefore undesirable meat.

           With Abigail beside him, those that snuck glances made no move to speak. Beverly and Molly sat across from him, and it was as easy to avoid their stare as it was anyone else’s. His eyes fixed to the corner of his glasses, and he fiddled far too long with his spoon between bites.

           “Abigail,” her father said, speaking around Will’s back. “I’d like to speak with you after dinner, before my night watch.”

           “She was actually going to take me to the library,” Will said for her, after he polished off the wine. He needed it to keep his mouth from becoming too sharp. “Sorry.”

           On the other side of him, Abigail shifted in her chair, uncomfortable. He felt her father’s stare against his skin, prickling and persistent, but he ignored it. She was one of the only things that could have brought him to the table, one of the only things to convince him away from the solitary room that brought him some form of respite. If the look in Hobb’s eyes was any indication, he’d made a good call. One of few, but still good.

           Despite the disquieting sensation of so many eyes on him throughout dinner, when Abigail reached out underneath the table and took his hand to squeeze it, Will didn’t recoil from her. Instead, he returned the gesture, squeezing just as tight.

-

           Hannibal Lecter was the one to walk about with him on the grounds that evening. It wasn’t so much an option, in truth; Will had waited until Hobbs saw himself off towards his shift of night watch, then left Abigail in the presence of a boy somewhat near her age that smiled with an awkward cheekiness. Standing there in the foyer and watching Abigail walk away left Will with something aching just at the space where his ribs met in the center of his chest –something painful and persistent.

           Then Hannibal appeared at his elbow and suggested a walk.

           He zipped his coat against the cold and huddled into the shell of it as he trudged through the damp grass. Hannibal followed, a whisper of a step behind, and if he had something in mind to discuss, it wasn’t voiced. He let Will pause just at the edge of the forest, and he didn’t give voice to the warning that the chafing ankle bracelet provided.

           Birds cried in the dying light, the sun sinking far too soon now that Fall was upon them. Will tracked fast, frantic leaps of bats dancing among the trees in search of bugs, and he stuffed his hands deep into his pockets to maintain warmth. There was the crisp smell of acorns and clover, coupled with the rancid bitterness of the dying leaves on the forest floor. Will inhaled it and held it inside of him as long as he could. When he exhaled sharply, great clouds puffed and curled about his mouth, wisping up above his head.

           “You once told me that you dreamt of a house in the middle of a forest,” Hannibal said quietly, disturbing the quiet. “That sometimes, if your dreams became lucid, you would walk to. Standing in the field beside it, you would look back to the lights and feel some semblance of peace. It appeared much like a boat adrift on the ocean, and it was one of the few times within your own mind that you could feel safe.”

           When Will said nothing in response, he continued, “Is that what you were searching for when you called Jack Crawford? Some semblance of safety?”

           “Some semblance of sanity,” Will muttered.

           “And you found a Great, Red Dragon instead.”

           “There were no speeches tonight. Are you trying to normalize these people to me?” Will asked. He glanced back to Hannibal, scowling. “Because I sat next to a man who’s murdered at least eight women and ate them during dinner.”

           “And you stand now in front of a man that’s killed fourteen.”

           “No, I stand in front of a man that was convicted for the murders of fourteen,” Will corrected crossly.

           Hannibal neither confirmed nor denied. He merely smiled, the faint moonlight above making his blue eye appear far darker than it was.

           Will looked back to the forest that contained the remnants of his panic, the aftershock of the fall of Randall Tier. He felt a scream building, but he didn’t want to let it out. If he started, Will figured he’d never stop –scream after scream after scream before he was swallowed whole by them all.

           “Who did you kill?” Will asked, agonized.

           “You refer to something recent?”

           “Who did you have these people kill?” Will reiterated, and he swallowed down a curse. “That has Jack Crawford sounding so tired?”

           “Thirty-two other people in this country held some variation of your name. My friends supposed that for me to be with someone, they should be utterly unique in every way,” Hannibal said after a long, pressing pause.

           His words stirred something in Will, something that made him round back on Hannibal, a snarl jerking past his lips.

           “Don’t call them your friends,” he hissed, and just beyond Hannibal’s shoulder there were faint shadows moving in front of curtains pulled across windows. “Don’t call those people your friends when you and I both know that you don’t give a damn about them. You don’t give a damn about anyone.”

           “Will-”

           “And don’t…don’t try and claim that you give a damn about me. You just want to possess me, control me because you don’t like being out of control. You have your pawns in there, and you have your lackeys, but when you’re out here trying to wrap me up inside of my own head, don’t try to bull shit me and tell me that any of those people are actually your friends, Hannibal Lecter. Not when just hours ago, you were content to inform me you’d kill any of them, should they stand between us.”

           The look on his face was impassive; it was his eyes, though, that made Will pause, made his breath suck back down his throat.

           God, he almost looked proud.

           “You see me in a way that no one else does,” Hannibal murmured. His voice was low, like he was revealing a grave, dark secret. “I’m glad that you’re becoming comfortable enough to speak your mind to me, all things considered.”

           All things considered being the fine line Will walked between living and dying, he supposed.

           “I shouldn’t be surprised that you could fool them all, considering how many of us you fooled.”

           “Some people just want a place where they feel like they belong, Will. Humans, despite everything, are social creatures. Pack creatures.”

           “Well, you may be fooling them, but you’re not fooling all of them.” Will watched a shadow pause before one of the curtains before they drew it open to stare outside. His smile was a snarl. “There are a few of those people that are well aware that the things you care for are in limited supply.”

           “You refer to Abigail?”

           “I refer to any of them that have to go to sleep with one eye open.”

           “I have Garrett Jacob Hobbs under control. Rest assured he won’t harm anyone here.”

           “His daughter isn’t so confident.”

           Hannibal smiled. “She’s resourceful, isn’t she? You’re so wary of my manipulations that at the first scent of an honest sob-story, you find your way to her and seek to protect her from not only Garrett Jacob Hobbs, but my presumed apathy to her plight. So sure are you of me, but you fail to see her in her entirety.”

           “She’s like me,” Will said, and he was suddenly aware of just how close Hannibal had become. A mere breath separated them, a strong breeze enough to make them touch. He stiffened his spine and wet his lips. “Sometimes…we have to do terrible things to survive.”

           “You led to the fall of Randall Tier.”

           “And whatever she’d done, it’s only so that she survives. I can respect that.”

           “Survive, survive,” Hannibal chanted, and his head dipped low, far too close. “That is your mantra, dear Will. To survive; not to live, not to Become. Just where are your lines, I wonder? When is it no longer survival, and instead basking within your own dark desires and fantasies?”

           Will thought of his dreams where he dipped hands in blood and licked them, thoughts when he wondered if he’d have to break Abigail should she dare touch him. Whatever his expression, it delighted Hannibal; his eyes brightened despite the gloom of the evening, and he withdrew, allowing Will his space, allowing Will enough air to breathe.

           “Just a thought,” Hannibal said, and he turned and headed back into the house.

           Will, despite everything in his bones screaming for him to run, had no other choice but to follow.

A lovely, warm thanks to my patrons: Emily Elm, Matilda, Sylarana, Heather Feather, Inky-Starlight, Duhaunt6, Superlurk, and Frosty Lee! <3 You guys are the best!

[weofthe100-archive]

Friendsverse: Where Have They Been?

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 

“What the hell are you doing out here?”

“Annoying you into showing your face.” He grinned.

“Don’t you have something to be hitting right now?” She wasn’t in a mood to play his games. She just wanted to lay in her bed and pretend she was somewhere not here.

“Yup, which is why you should feel so flattered that I’m here.” He held out an arm, nodding to the spot beneath it. “Come join me. You can’t sulk all day.”

She hesitated, but she didn’t retreat back to her room. “What are you watching?”

“The Great British Bake Off.”

“You’re shitting me.” She laughed, coming further into the living room until she could see the screen. “You’re not shitting me.”

“I never shit about baked goods. Come. Sit. Watch trashy cooking tv where their biggest problem is that their soufflé didn’t inflate properly.” He nodded again, and she crept further into the room until she was at the couch and could curl up under Louis’ arm and they watched quietly for a couple minutes.

“I don’t think it’s called inflating.” She said into the silence.

“Fluffing, poofing, whatever. Wouldn’t it be nice if that was your biggest problem in the world? How simple would your life be at that point?”

Silence again, but eventually she spoke up again. “I mean, if you think about it, half these people are hoping to get into the business. This is their dream on the line. Seems stressful to me.”

He eyed her for a second before turning back to the television. “You’re quite the little pessimist you know that?”

She rolled her eyes. “I prefer realist.”

“Or a realist masquerading as a pessimist who is secretly an optimist.”

She burst out laughing. “That’s a line from Hitch and you know it.”

“Great movie. Many life lessons.”

“Is that where you get all your moves?”

“You know it baby.”

The episode eventually ended and she sighed, glancing back to her room but making no move to get up. Instead she stayed under the warm comfort of Louis’ arm, watching as the show automatically flicked over to the next episode. “Why’d you want me out here? I wasn’t bugging your television watching.”

“Because baking shows are better than moping.”

“I wasn’t moping.”

“You were.” Maybe she was, but that wasn’t his business. She didn’t reply, just stared at the television until he was the one to break the silence this time. “Breakups suck, I’m sorry.”

They both knew that was only the tip of the iceberg of her issues, but it was easier to hide in the safety of a common hurt rather than jump right into the subject of her parents. “We weren’t even actually dating.” Her voice was soft, almost self-loathing about how upset she as over something she knew from the beginning couldn’t last.

“Whatever. Breaking whatever-it-was off with someone sucks.” He hugged her a little, pressing a kiss to her temple. “But it won’t hurt forever.” I really hope not, she thought. “You’re tough, you’ll survive.”

“I’ve managed this long.” She muttered almost disappointedly. “You ever have problems like this?”

He shrugged, jostling her shoulders. “Yes and no. I have problems; not like yours, but problems all the same.” He glanced down at her. “You ever wonder why I fight like I do?”

“Too much innate male aggressiveness?”

He burst into laughter, shaking his head. “You think guys are innately aggressive?”

“I’ve yet to meet one who’s proved me wrong.” She was too serious; it was a serious conversation sure, but she was such a downer right now, it irked him that he couldn’t help, which prodded him to try harder. He wasn’t used to soft, self-hating girls like Fox; he was used to strong self-hating girls like Mandy and Octavia.

“Well.” he let that go for the moment. “I fight because there’s something about fighting that makes me feel normal. When I’m not fighting it’s like… I’m not feeling. Not how I’m supposed to. And I know other people don’t feel that way, and I don’t know what’s different about me, but there’s something wrong with me.” She didn’t disagree with him, simply watched him with too-assessing eyes. It wasn’t an unusual confession for him, she wasn’t the first to hear it, but the reactions varied. “So I fight because it’s the only way I can feel normal for a while.”  

He was waiting for the judgement, the pity, the sympathy, the disgust, something. But all she did was smirk up at him. “See? Too much innate male aggression. You may as well have just said ‘fox you’re so right how’d you get so smart?’ and saved yourself the trouble.”

He burst into laughter again and hugged her to him. “You’re cute.”

She knew they were empty words, a useless compliment from lips too used to raining praise on people, but she took it and let herself relax a little against him. But after too long passed while they watched a show neither were paying attention to, she spoke again.

“He thinks I’m disgusting.”

“Then fuck him.” His tone had darkened; he hadn’t pegged Bellamy for the type, but both girls had used the same terminology, and it ruffled his feathers. “You’re better than that, foxie.”

She wasn’t though, she knew that. “Murphy thinks it too. I’m surprised he even came, he knew I was there and I knew he didn’t like the idea.”

Something clicked. “Murphy knew you were there?” He asked innocently. “Did he know about Octavia?”

She shrugged. “I don’t really remember what I told him.” She blushed in embarrassment. “It was a weird night when we sort of talked about it.”

That blush was interesting but he didn’t have the patience to draw it out of her at the moment. “Fox, I’m pretty sure Murph planned that night from the texts I got, there’s a good chance he did it to rile up Bellamy.” He didn’t know why, but the boys’ fight was a clear indication that Bellamy had been the source of Murphy’s anger for whatever reason.

Her face was stricken. “Wait so- it’s my fault?”

God she was going to be the death of him. This was why he didn’t take in charity cases. “No. If he did it, it’s his fault.” She just… gave him the ammunition. But he wasn’t going to say that. She had turned her face down, away from him and hiding behind a curtain of hair, and he narrowed his eyes curiously. “What?”

“I don’t know what I did to piss him off.”

“Maybe something, maybe nothing. Boys are fucktards, it’s hard to tell sometimes.”

“You realize you just called yourself a fucktard.”

“Would you disagree?” Silence. “Exactly.”

“If I just knew what I’d done-”

“If you knew then what?” His voice had gotten harder. “Would it change what he did? Would it change your prof dumping you? Octavia hating you for something you didn’t mean to do? Would it change how you feel right now and everyone who contributed to it?”

“If I apologized, though… they’re just mad because I-”

“Stop.” She flinched at the harshness in his voice, and pulled back from him, still sitting next to him but no longer against him. “Stop fucking saying “I”. You fucked up, maybe, but that doesn’t mean you have to roll over and take it. So Murphy and Octavia are mad; fuck ‘em then. Eventually they’ll stop being mad or they won’t- that’s not in your control. How you react to it is. So stop playing dead for people. Fight back. Act like you deserve to be loved and forgiven. Like you deserve a chance to fight for something better.”

He had grown up with a support system that taught him what he was preaching. She didn’t; she was still hoping for things that were never going to happen, needing that love and that approval that it was all too clear now was never coming, no matter what she’d done or did or anything. “That’s easy for you to say; you were loved.” She’d lost her chance to have that support, and he was an asshole for going there.

“And you can’t believe it because you weren’t.”

Wow. Not as much as he was an asshole for that. That stricken look was back, a deer in the headlights of a mac truck that collided with her somewhere in her soul. It was true, he was the only person aside from Mandy who knew the reality of his words, which made them all the worse, all the more deliberate. Her lips parted to respond, but after a second of nothing coming out she closed her mouth again.

“Try believing it once in a while, Fox.” His voice had gentled, maybe realizing she wasn’t the kind of person he was used to who would fight back at his words, hit him or yell at him or something. But Fox just sat, letting the words eat away at her, and he looked almost ( but not quite ) sorry. She clenched her jaw against what she could have said, or could have done, and leapt off the couch to retreat back to her room.

PART 2.5

Fox disappeared into her room and Louis did the same, leaving the tv on behind him to give some noise to the apartment. All this talk about love and bullshit was giving him familiar urges, and he fell back onto his bed to stare up at the ceiling for a while. He still had the number in his phone ( he’d probably always have the number in his phone ), it’d be so simple to press his finger to the button, wait for the little robot to ask who to call, and say his name. Within seconds, he could be talking to him.

But that wasn’t a good idea. He’d gone too long without talking to him. Instead, he opened his phone, clicking to messages and tapping the conversation with his neighbor. Fucktard or not, responsible for the night or not, practically attached to Clarke’s crotch or not, he knew who he wanted to talk to to get his mind off more dangerous thoughts.

Feel like hanging out Hey I could use some company Feel like drowning some sorrows please come over

“Fuck!” He closed the phone again, spinning it between his fingers as he stared up at the ceiling. He could call Octavia, but then he’d have to explain himself. Same with Mandy or any of the other girls ( why did girls need so much justification in life? Why couldn’t things just be? ), and before he could consider another option, he was opening the phone, tapping the phonebook and dialing the number.

Ring, Ring, Ring- “Lou.”

A smile crossed his lips despite himself, and he felt his body grow heavier, relaxing into the bed. “Hey.”

“Long time no talk.” He sounded uncomfortable, worried, and it was no secret why. Three years was a long time to go without talking to someone you were used to hearing every day. Distance, as it turned out, did not make the heart grow fonder. Just more nervous. He probably thought Louis was dying somewhere.

It wouldn’t be a stretch given their last conversation.

“Yeah, just… wanted to say hi.”

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah, ‘course.” He’d hear the lie, and Louis quickly brushed over the concern. “How’s Cornell? You ever decide between law and medicine?”

The laugh he was rewarded with was a little warmer than his words had been. “Law.”

“Ooh, shot to your mom. How’d she take it?”

“Decently, considering.”

“Too bad, really. One of my roommates’ mom is dean of medicine or head of the hospital or whatever at one of the hospitals here in DC. Could have introduced you.” He hadn’t even spoken to Clarke in weeks, irritated by the overly obvious displays of affection for someone who’s dick had been in his mouth multiple times. ( that very fact probably meant he shouldn’t even be trying to text Murphy either, but he’d never claimed to be perfect )

But the opportunity to point out a potential usefulness he could have offered his former best friend was too good to let pass.

The other boy clucked his tongue in mock disappointment. “Well damn, now I have to go changing majors, think of all the paperwork.” Louis laughed with him, a little too eagerly.

“I’d say I’m sorry but…” he let it die into a laugh, pleased when the thought was finished for him. Just like old times.

“We both know you’re not.”

He was nodding even if the boy on the other end couldn’t see him, and they fell into momentary silence that Louis was eager to fill. “You coming back for a visit anytime soon?”

He’d overstepped, he could feel it over the line, in the way his laughter hitched, the way his voice grew brisk, in his next words. “Maybe for a little while over break. Listen, Lou, I’ve got to go I’m actually at class now, well, outside it, I just thought something might be wrong.”

“No yeah, of course. Have fun. I’ll talk to you later?” The phrase, always a formality rather than a question in their past, suddenly became a genuine question, his voice lilting in unfamiliar uncertainty.

A beat too long, and he felt his heart skip. “Bye, Lou.”

“Bye Phil.” He held the phone to his ear a minute after it had gone dead, jaw clenching against the pain, and suddenly his arm lashed out, and the phone flew from his hand to the wall, shattering against the wall and leaving little pieces of glass on the ground next to the black, broken screen. He raked his hands across his face roughly, trying to purge the memories and the tears both.

This was why he didn’t fuck around with bullshit like love.

[ask-the-amazing-helix]

just to warn you this ones a long one but i hope you still give it a shot and enjoy the story but yay lore, thats right im actually capable of that, if you like my art or the story please leave a like and consider reblogging it just takes a sec and lets me know what you all think.

anyways story stuff below the break, also sorry if its a little sloppy i suck at writing but if theres anything you curious about please feel free to send an ask anytime)

Eco and Helix walked through the school, Eco pointing out some of the rooms as they walked to help him learn the layout of the school

Eco: aaand here we are this is Professor Gages class, she teaches the science and stuff behind magic so she studies all sorts of magic to learn about how it works and stuff.

Professor Gage was reading a book and upon hearing Eco approach she closed the book and watched them come in

Gage: Hello miss Weaver i’m surprised to see you at school so early, should we be worried?

Gage chuckled and eco stuck her tongue out

Eco: ha ha very funny but no i met this dude yesterday while chasing bonebutt..

Gage cut her off

Gage: miss Weaver we’ve been through this you need to leave him to the authorities the canterlot reaper is very dangerous and to be avoided NOT pursued.

Eco scoffed and rolled her eyes

Eco: yeah yeah i know but i heard i scream and i wanted to help... i totally wasn't already searching for him... but uhh its ok he got away before i got there anyways, this dude scared him off and hes a mancer and hes comming to this school soon and he needs to get good fast and I WANNA SEE HIS FAMILIAR... buut he doen’t know anything about stuff so i thought id bring him to you...oh yeah his names Helix by the way

Helix just stared as Eco said all that in a single breath leaving her to catch her breath at the moment

Gage: a mancer huh? i’ve been very eager to meet more after my chats with Eco here, what kind of mancer are you?

Helix: uh yeah i didn't really know about any of this till a couple months ago, i just studied magic trying to learn anything i could, but i’ve always learned fire and water magic pretty easily and a couple months ago i was returning some books to the ponyville library and one of them was about pyromancy. that’s actually what led to me applying here after finding out i was a pyromancer twilight wanted me to come here to improve my magic so she could learn more about pyromancy and not long after that we found out i also know hydromancy.

Gages eyes lit up at hearing that

Gage: pyromancy AND hydromancy? well thats very interesting, well at least your name makes more sense now.

Helix gave her a confused look

Helix: makes sense? i’m not even sure what it means is it like an element thing or something?

Gage: no, i suppose technically you're name should be double helix for it to fit in that sense. a helix is a spiral or a vortex, so your cutie mark is kind of like a double helix but no by makes sense i meant it as in its like a yin yang spiral... if that makes sense. a yin yang is kind of like a balance between good and evil which is perfect because of pyromancy being dark magic and i suppose hyromancy would be considered holy magic since its based on purity. oh this will be soo fun i’ve never been about to personally study dark magic before

Eco: yeah its that cool your’e like some anime dude, i bet you got a troubled past and hey you even got the hair

Helixs eyes widened and jaw dropped 

Helix: whoa whoa whoa wait dark magic? no that’s not right dark magic is like you know dark, its evil, im not evil.

he just stood there eyes frozen in shock as Gage continued

Gage: no no no dark magic isnt ‘evil’ its just dangerous and can corrupt your mind if you are not careful but so are a lot of things we still use like money its only dangerous if you’re careless with it. but yes pyromancy is dark magic... hmm maybe it would be simpler if i just explain where mancies came from.

you seen over a thousand years ago after the princesses celestia and luna took over after helping protect the newly founded equestria the sisters took it upon themselves to aid the ponies in any way they could to help them build the world we know today as the rulers. they didn't take over to control everything no they took over to protect everything. you wont find it in any books i probably shouldn't say this but i just find it so interesting but the sisters weren't born alicorns, one was a unicorn and the other a pegasi, and through using the elements of harmony they were granted immense power thus making them alicorns to accommodate that power.

after they took over princess celestia took over all matters of politics and public relations due to her inexperience with magic and princess luna took over security with her new power to ensure everyponies safety but luna wasn't just content with that. she didn’t want to just protect them she wanted to help them grow so she actually created hydromancy and terramancy to help with farming and to heal the sick and injured and after that she created geomancy due to its versatility and then gaiamancy later to help the ponies protect themselves when a neighboring nation attempted to invade.

sadly despite everything princess luna had done princess celestia had a natural charisma and between that and luna doing so much of her work behind the scenes the ponies of equestria favored celestia over her and every day it gnawed at her mind till eventually the darkness in her heart took over turning her into nightmare moon but things weren't as cut and dry as most history books claim.

according to several texts i’ve found that had nearly been lost to time the princesses didnt just fight no no no there was actually a war that broke out, some texts refer to it as the lunar rebellion others called it the dark ages. the war waged for years, how many exactly i still have no idea but it had to of lasted several years at least and it ultimately ended in the finally battle we know in the stories that led celestia to sealing luna away on the moon for the next thousand years.

during the war however the mancies took a crucial role as they were the most advanced magic of that era so with that in mind nightmare moon created two more mancies before she was finally stopped, pyromancy was made as a weapon to counter the healing of hydromancy and necromancy was created to keep nightmare moons arm fighting so long as her nightmare generals lived.

so in your case your cutie mark resembling a yin yang could be considered an example of balance between good and evil, or a double helix of light and dark.

so how much have you learned on your own so far? i cant wait to study you i have so many questions.

helix just stood there still in shock having a hard time taking everything in

Gage: Helix?

Eco: i think you fried him prof you got too wordy and blew his mind i think

eco poked helix a couple times

Eco: welp this isn't going anywhere for a while i’m gonna go play outside

Gage: you know very well classes will be starting soon

Eco: i know and class sucks. im just taking recess early

Gage: this isn't elementary school we don’t have recess

before she could finish eco was already gone so she looked back at helix

Gage: hmm i should probably take you to the nurses office so i can finish preparing todays lesson.