#maybe like (character name) zero?
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Reminiscing about Little Witch Academia.
#personal#delete later#maybe i'll talk about it tomorrow but it's a really cool anime and i'm forever shocked that it was made by trigger#a full cast of teenage girls and absolutely zero fanservice or sexualizing! what a concept!#also i was looking at designs for the bg student characters because they designed a whole student body to fill the school and gave them#names and nationalities and personalities and. there's a middle eastern student who wears a hijab/niqab! how cool is that!!#i don't think i've ever seen rep like that in a mainstream anime and speaks to how they genuinely gave a shit about diversity#you read about all these bg character's details and realize how much they cared about this anime's world#there are these twin from india who are both very protective of their smaller roommate and will get into fights about taking care of her#none of them have lines in the anime#there is a fat side character who is sweet and unapologetically just likes to eat and everyone is friends with her#there is a canonically butch character and an entire episode about her crossdressing as a man
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yknow, I am amused that solangelo fanon was so tunnel-vision in like 2014 that in the midst of crawling through literally every time Will had popped up in the series prior, somehow the ONE singular instance of Will referencing something that the fandom did absolutely nothing with was the thing Rick then decided to draw out into being a major character trait for Will.
Like. Nico eats McDonalds once and it becomes a huge fanon thing, but Will references Star Trek and the fandom doesn't make a peep until Rick explicitly canonizes that he's a huge sci fi nerd. and Rick doesn't even keep it consistent! He changes it so Will is a Star Wars nerd instead of Star Trek. smh 😔 /lh
#pjo#riordanverse#will solace#this is in jest i hc Will is just a general sci fi nerd but i just find it funny that like#yeah Will being a sci-fi nerd DOES get referenced relatively early on in his character#its just literally nobody cared a singular bit to acknowledge it in fanon before TOA#and somehow *that* is the thing Rick went ''ah yes! a character trait! this will become a huge part of his personality''#also amused that Rick changed it from Star Trek to Star Wars. did Disney tell you to do that Richard. be honest.#Rick named his cat Tribble i know where his biases lie#also the fact that this line exists makes Will's later star wars nerd characterization even funnier imo#because it DOES imply he's a general sci fi nerd. possibly even bigger nerd than initially implied#cause it means he's largely familiar with at least two major sci fi series#which then implies that probably extends further. and again there is like next to zero fanon about this#fanon sees Will's sci fi nerd characterization and just goes ''...meh. nah.'' maybe gives him a lil star wars at best#this is a totally neutral thing i just think its funny#like now wait hold on. lets hear out his Avatar and DW opinions
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i like making shrine maiden characters :]
#the girl w/ the school uniform is a shrine maiden too#i just wanted to design her school outfit lol#shook wips#rei (oc)#mocha (oc)#yes i am aware rei kinda looks like/has a similar name to reimu#what can i say. i like touhou. a 'funny shrine maiden who fights yokai' character made by me is gonna have some reimu in her dna lol#though her name is mainly bc the spelling '零' which translates to zero#which is relevant bc plot reasons#also mocha's name is pronounced 'mo-cha' not 'mo-ka'#i did not realize i was naming her after coffee until i wrote it down lmao#anyways. expect to see these again when i finish the full canvas cjhbvcjv bc it's gonna have like. atleast 3 more designs on it. maybe 4.
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Really tired of people calling FG by the one name that makes zero sense in context, is alienating to a lot of people, and is actually the single figure Mojito has confirmed he's not. Are people just unaware of one of the more popular hairstyles/looks for guys with long(ish) brown(ish) hair and beards/beard stubble in (and out of) media?
People/characters listed left to right, starting with the top:
Row 1: Sebastian Stan as Bucky Barnes in Captain America: The Winter Soldier; François Arnaud as Cesare Borgia in The Borgias; David Wenham as Faramir in The Lord of the Rings; Oded Fehr as Ardeth Bay in The Mummy Returns; Jason Carter as Marcus Cole in Babylon 5
Row 2: Kevin Sorbo as Hercules in Hercules: The Legendary Journeys; Liam Neeson as Qui-Gon Jinn in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace; "Foreign God" in ENNEAD Season 1, Episde 65; "Foreign God" in ENNEAD Season 2, Episode 10; Robin Atkin Downes; Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing in Van Helsing
Row 3: Ewan McGregor as Obi-Wan Kenobi in Star Wars; Hades in Blood of Zeus, James Watson as Duncan Idaho in Dune (2000); Gale in Baldur's Gate 3; Viggo Mortensen as Aragorn in The Lord of the Rings
Row 4: Mark Ryder as Cesare Borgia in Borgia; Jason Momoa; Nigel Terry as King Arthur in Excalibur; Christian Kane as Eliot Spencer in Leverage; Jared Padalecki
Like I could keep adding people and characters to this because this style is so damn common (I was honestly tempted to make a second collage, bare minimum). But I'd be here forever. There are a number of other fan names for the unnamed foreign god, including Foreign God, FG, Beard, Mustache, or you could go with what Seth calls him, "Furball".
#ennead#foreign god ennead#fg ennead#there are so many guys who have this style#trying to remember them all is impossible#a lot more with blonde and red hair as well#like if you watch movies or shows set in ancient Greece or Rome in particular#and shows set in Europe and the US in the 1700s-1800s#you see this everywhere#and it's popular for singers too#apologies for people confused about this showing up in their tags#like I don't get why it's meant to be funny as a joke name#is the joke “lol I don't know what men look like”?#why do people have to involve xtianity even in places where it's not involved#it's worse when people actually think it's a potential identity for FG#when no that makes zero sense for FG as a character and the person people think he is#or the story on the whole#and again Mojito confirmed he's not Jesus#like obviously people can do whatever they want#I just find this whole phenomenon really annoying#I remember when bg3 came out and people were spamming the tags with Gale saying he looked like FG#it's not a rare look#yes I am aware people have gotten McGregor's Obi-Wan confused with Jesus before#and yes I am aware that Cesare is at least theorized to be an inspiration for modern white Jesus looks#doesn't change the fact the look is common#mostly it just means people keep doing this and it's always been dumb#fallfthoughts#maybe stop perpetuating xtian supremacy so casually#also if you literally wander around multiple countries around the Mediterranean many men look like this#years ago I was in one city off the coast and literally every direction I looked was at least 1-3 men who looked like this
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Worked on a ref for my fursona 🎉
#her name is diane and she's actually more like. my sona in general?#it's just. okay so diane is if i need a sona for stuff#and she has different aspects of her in different universes and different species and such#so my fursona is the furry version of her. if that makes sense#i also have an mlp pony version i made as a joke with a friend floating around#i could make a tiefling version of her because that's my usual pick for a dnd race#etc etc you get it i think#i need to find her a masc name for when she's a guy#for gender exploration purposes on my end but also because i like having options#anyway so she's a pigeon and i'm pretty happy with a drawing#hopefully i'll finish it soon and i can show people#i think she's cool. personally. zero bias here :)#i guess diane as a persona is kind of like. the same vibe as meredith?#meredith is an oc so she's not Me but she's... who i want to be. i want to be like her but better#meredith is who i'm trying to be even cooler than when i hit my 50s (in a looonnng time)#diane is more like who i hope i will be like in a few years#maybe i'll make it so she's always a few years ahead of me. the cool future me i can be#meredith is a character i want to be like because i like her#diane is a character i'm making up to hype myself up about my own future. she's me mostly#diane is achievable. meredith is a 52yo vampire who makes potions.#wow i have a ramble tag now
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@letsbegoblingods replied to your post “Danny phantom ghost king and marceline the...”:
Marceline is from Adventure Time, but I feel like she'd have wildly different reactions to Danny depending when in both her personal timeline and the shows' timeline she was at.
Nice! I shall trust your assessment of the situation.
#thanks for your two cents!#ladylynse#replies#letsbegoblingods#adventure time is one of those shows where I can recognize the animation style and name zero characters#or I guess one character now#if pressed I might be able to come up with the name of the dog or the boy (I think he's a boy?)#I think it's something like flynn but that sounds wrong so probably not that but maybe close???#I do not know whether it is the human's name or the dog's name which is the sad part
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Might be strange sounding, but the card reveals/banlists always come in 2 different perspectives for me, irrelevant of which banlist I'm playing under; because I write fics, I have to contend with the banlist at times (a majority of the time it's based on the sort of half-tcg, half-ocg Master Duel banlist with Anime Specific Additions.)
So when new cards come out I have to judge them not only by what I can figure out from their effects and traits (combined with what's currently meta, and if there's anything that wants to play the new cards, whilst being mindful of banlist differences), I also have the joy of internally discussing the value of a deck when its in a fictional setting.
I don't think anyone normally thinks about if a deck's theme is strong enough to tie a character to it, let alone if a deck's theme is too strong and tying a character to it is like Akihiko Sanada's obsession with protein in anything that isn't mainline persona (Like the Q games.)
Also makes engines less appealing.
#marwospeaking#Mikan plays Xyz-based Harpies. Manon plays Ashened. and Risa plays Memento trying to pretend its not a fusion deck#are these good decks? maybe only Memento. Do they fit the characters? surprisingly yes#Mikan's kind of like. pretty to look at. but not fun to interact with in any way. Manon wants to set her cell on fire (out of frustration)#and Risa's memory is so spotty she has zero idea who she is besides very basic details like her name (and how to play Memento main deck)#If you asked me to build someone who plays Despia. I could. If you asked me to build someone who plays Snake Eye. I could not.#Primoredial? sure! White Woods? maybe! Raizeol? ...sure. great archetype for engineers/mechanics?#Goblin Biker? Sure! Sky Striker? ehhh maybe? Fiendsmith? No. Yubel? ... only they play themself I'm fairly certain#These aren't really inspiring decks (the current meta ones I mean) in a way you'd really want for a character deck#(Kashtira wasn't either. admittedly)#They're small collections of cards that play half their deck as staples. what the hell kind of character can you build from that??#Before anyone asks. Mimighoul I could absolutely make a character for (in the same vein as Flip Turner). same with poor Tistina#Fiendsmith's theme is obviously strong. Its just one of Those kinds of decks where either everything else is powercrept. or it feels..#.. too small of a deck to do anything interesting with going pure with a few techs for the character#(some characters don't play pure. but when they do; those decks get combined support. Ojama Armed Dragon for example)#(Odd-eyes Performapal Magician and Onomats are the two others I can think of that do this. Yusei's pile does not count)#Another issue is when you have a set victor for a duel. but one character has a deck that's a calibre above what the victor will be using..#.. like Trickstar vs Cyberse Pile (might be multiple calibres). It becomes either not very fun or a very ass-pull looking victory#worse if it's a plot point duel with a lot of weight. even worse when it's too early on for 'oh they've grown as a duellist'#I'm rambling. anyway point is Secret Card Analysis Type: Fic Writer That Writes Duels
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a decade later sure i'll put it into Text Post "tumblr user claims: plausibly may feasibly" form, starting with these classic screenshots i still have saved
this being dialogue from 2015's always watching: a marble hornets story, which is like hey this is a pretty well produced indie venture & you can sure like sit through it even if you then never watch it again b/c it's still kind of overly on the beaten path & "i'm not sure this choice is justified in much of anything" (see: bizarrely omnipresent thread of a love triangle just to be There; typical Mental Patient(tm) Harbinger; several real marked More Is Less instances arguably) that is still a better time than other random horror material i've seen & hated vs. only mostly been underwhelmed by but in an Overall Shrug way alone. yeah imdb's 4.7 out of 10 seems fair enough if you consider like 5 stars truly middle of the road solid if forgettable vs that anything < 7 stars is for [Bad!] or whatever
anyways the main character is named milo & indeed the creator(s) / actors / writers troy joseph & tim were involved in the production at all: tim at least by being the first step in doug jones's casting by reaching out directly (online), but troy & joseph also via Some writing, like in that slender game sequel also: not the Primary creators / writers, but still officially involved in the creative process at all. & i knew of them & they knew of me by this time & in a [source: dude just trust me] style of way, i, a tumblr user, am like "i think milo alwayswatching Could be named after me, milo unproduciblesmackdown. lol." b/c also like yeah i can take it on the chin if it's a coincidence, which is also likely. great name & it's just not being used enough in fictional & nonfictional people's names. you might also be aware that some role in tribetweIve is named milo (maybe the main guy. i never watched it) so you might also speculate it's named after that guy, which seems plausible also, But: afaik there are no other similar plausible shoutouts at all, to that series or to emh which was just as majorly like One Of Those 3 Biggest Online Series. may or may not add a grain of salt to take it with. like my own "of course, there's a grain of salt in 'milo just like me milo, and Uncoincidentally?' b/c how wouldn't there be. a name people have"
the dude just trust me argument: distilling it down to "i went to their first convention & then the same one the next year, & in these experiences i Know they knew of me from that + also online, where people knew my name was milo as well" and "it seems feasible enough it's an easter egg Not Coincidence that i first knew this character's name happened to also be milo b/c someone who experienced a clip sent me an ask about it, so they assumed it was a possible actual connection too lol." and, of course, it might be a fun coincidence after all. but i'm still like "yeah no it Could be a funny little shoutout to me specifically for real" and mean it and, again, i can endure it if i'm completely wrong. b/c who could care, and also b/c it's so funny that the character is a guy who basically just is like "i am going to have a bad attitude. b/c of the insistent tiresome love triangle thing. well now I'm insistently tiresome" and fucking everything up but like, sure. exasperating epic fail protagonists
the only relevance i think it has besides "to me, b/c i can go haha yeah. that might be like: just like me!!" is that it's Also plausible b/c yeah marble hornets Is the kind of series that might go "this could be an easter egg about some queer autistic tumblr user we know about" lmao, its Inherent Queerness both re: the material and in the creators' knowledge like yep that's how our Appreciators skew! like it's low stakes to be like [lol, Me. perhaps] b/c it's obviously of zero importance like it adds no info, i'm just some rando queer fan from back in the day, but it's this potential Fun Fact that's funny to know & it's about "yeah like they knew i was trans back then too & that it was like, amidst the MH Fans, like nobody's cishet man (shaggy rogers voice)" Gay Rights!
#marble hornets#It's Possible And Someone Should Say It#and like fr i'm saying it with a swagful humility b/c yeah ofc it feels like an overreach to be like ME Milo???? but it could be fr#and ofc it's just a funny little detail If So so it's also really not that much of a reach b/c nobody else could care one way or another#the only possible Reactions beyond ''main character named milo? this has zero extra meaning for me''#is Me; Specifically going [gasp!] (which i did anyways b/c Pointing! & b/c yeah thee whole time it's like It Could Be Just Like Me Fr)#and tribetwelveheads going ''like as in tribetweIve?'' which like still maybe but gotta keep it real with you chief: Less Likely#it's funny if i'm right And it's funny if i'm wrong so like yeah ofc i'll Just Say It. i can endure in good humour if Knowing no it's not#and like i could just ask. but in my prior chitchatting with [Yeah We Know Of Each Other] quadruple A status#(amicable and/or allied acquaintance) like it just hasn't ever been much or really At All abt marble hornets or anything else ''official''#yeah i Could barge into tim's dms like HEY do you MAYBE KNOW this trivia?? about MEEE??? but like. i'm not gonna lmao#i'm gonna be like: post more new kittycat pics worstie!!!! if anything.#or be like ''you're So right. recommend skinamarink to all past present future marble hornets fans'' hell yeah king#(as someone who Hypothetically enjoys horror; thus in actual practice virtually always hates horror. That Fr! sm good fckg food)#anyways like it can't possibly matter. sure just as plausibly a ''haha no it Is coincidental'' situation like & so i can endure that though#it's most plausible thanks to the [i did manage to make it to their first convention! a lot of fun. & i bought their mask]#like this fact was 99% irrelevant to Anyone Else; e.g. anyone online then or now#but it did boost making me a specific person the main creative / production trio guys Knew Of lol. being a queer autistic fan can do that#i also never use these screenshots lol but i did save them & still like just now stumble across them like oh yeah that guy! that Mystery!#we can keep it up for that mystique & ambiguity. & b/c again i have no cause to barge in at an A.A.A.A. like Answer My Trivia Boy!!#this would Also be funny but for the sake of any actual 4A rapport i will not be attempting it for Detached Jests#(conveniently this prevents me from bravely enduring taking it on the chin anyways! hence casually posting a Fun Fact. we'll never know)#also remembering i don't even have my name being milo on my blog header. But It Is
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#me: ok brain we got three wips we need to make progress on#brain: OR. consider. we write for a show we haven't watched in two years#brain: OR BETTER YET. How about write something for these characters we like but don't actually watch the show#😑😑😑#kee speaks#my phone needs to charge cause my day isn't done yet but the cord doesn't stay in very well so I cant handle it while charging#so i pulled out my little note pad to try snd jot ideas down and brain keeps giving unhelpful ideas with only characters and zero scenarios#so i need my phone for prompts but shouldn't use phone until charged#a problem (i say as i am actively using my phone)#and now a song just came on that never ceases to remind me of said show i haven't watched in a few years so maybe that's a sign#need to google some shit before I write a whole fic with the wrong name because I have already done that with these guys lol
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I wonder if mime dog would be into selfcest?
I mean, ya know, by the nature of clowns and mimes and whatnot, I’m sure there’s multitudes of clown mime dogs exactly like her.
#selfcest anon I love you so much#but also there’s like Zero character to Clown Mime Dog ndhdbdbxgd sorry#anon asks#honestly at this point maybe I’ll give her a name and some sort of personality
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In other news heres a flip the coin game: Is it a new fandom interest or did i think too hard about a funny pairing dynamic so it is kicking around in my brain for longer than expected (on top of spending over three weeks between being amused by the inclusion of historical mythology a kid i used to babysit was obsessed with combined with mentally lamenting over 'of COURSE they made him a blonde white guy, its anime why did i expect better') or wind up thinking about something else related to it a tiny bit too hard.
#Let me tell you my brain deciding to just randomly pick situations and crack ships during an nine hour ER visit accompanying a friend??#did not help.#I either officially have one foot in hell now.#Or my brain has been too tired to give a fuck about hyperfixations so its just been?#Its just been whatever the fuck my friends have been yammering on about.#The *checks notes* 'worst guy to find relatable' situation has done zero favours because the brain is all 'here. here is a guy you can writ#--easily. it will be fun. promise.' from time to time. (spoiler: its easy for Not Fun reasons)#While on the flip side the part of me that never quite let go of my childhood historical interests wants to flip a table.#Because i fucking hate how 'stuck up blonde white guy' fits the personality they chose.#Oh well. Take things as they go one step at a time because im too bored to care to choose to do something else with my time every other--#--tuesday night.#Honestly it would of been fine if it wasn't a old hyperfixation of a friend who started prattling on about one of the games.#Did NOT help lmao. Shit was so 'oh fuck this character is extra relatable now and i fucking hate it' to the point that??#I spent like one third of my fortnightly allocated psych couch time talking about it while mentally face down in a pool.#because of the embarrassment over making a joke and underestimating the shit my brother told his ex gf.#She was not supposed to get the jokes secondary hidden punchline.#I Talk#I mean i dont hate the series.#I cannot say i love it either.#But it has merits here and there.#It is entertaining at least even if it could very much Do Better(tm)#The sad part is i can see exactly why one of my cousins recced it like a decade ago#i felt too embarrassed to ask what the name was again because i had forgotten between my job and health issues and craft hobbies.#....but now i think it was perhaps a good thing it was put off instead of added to the 'watch with the crew' pile.#Because im quite sure one of my friends would of been obnoxious about it lmao.#Because it would of been like the whole 'why dont you hate him more? your mother is eerile like frieza' situation all over again.#Which for the record was incredibly awkward having to explain that despite the similarities they are different enough it doesn't annoy me.#Also my mother isn't a fictional character.#But maybe im just good at compartmentalising shit like that.
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if anyone has ideas for what to draw my ocs doing send that to me because I love them but idk what to have them doing half the time lol
#I KNOW MOST OF MY FOLLOWERS DON'T KNOW SHIT ABOUT MY OCS OKAY#but. even if you just have vague ideas#or if it's just like ''idk draw someone wearing this'' or ''doing this''#maybe I can redraw some older art I guess. have a lot of old oc art#there's a couple characters I'm kinda deleting from their universe because I have zero ideas for them#so if I redraw big group pictures those two are just gonna be missing lmao#not the first time I've deleted characters from this (looks at Emma- the old Main Character that I stopped caring about)#but yeah bye melody and ciara. I think their name was ciara. don't even fucking remember#might repurpose them someday I guess we'll see#ANYWAY POINT IS#even like. you can send me memes and maybe I'll redraw those as ocs#send me. any ideas <3 I love drawing them
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i am tempted to post a photo of my halloween costume this year but i am also a huge massive fan

sorry had to make that joke. anyways i really like internet safety so please pretend i put a photo of me looking sick as hell in my costume here :)

the orange thing is my friend who went trick or treating w me as "orange spike".
homemade costume :) lemon meringue from strawberry shortcake (her 1991 appearance)
all thrifted, except for the petticoat which i already had and the armwarmers and tights which i bought
the friend in the drawing made the bow :)
used color wax (as i am copper) on my hair for the first time and i'm gonna be doing this forever now its awesome
#the blouse is actually another dress that was originally white but we dyed it#the dress im pretty sure is something someone made out of a blanket#the shoes were awful#only orange flats i could find on short notice#they were made out of squished faux leather i think#sole was totally flat cork-ish something (hard!!!)#and ZERO heel#there was a heel like a centimeter tall#sorry like#heel-holder#it felt like i was wearing flip flops#oh also i sewed the collar onto the dress#the sash is leftover ribbon from making the bows for the shoes#halloween costume#lemon meringue#strawberry shortcake#note: i dont know much about strawberry shortcake the franchise#so maybe thats not the name#i just like the characters#about the hair wax#i really did like it and intend to use it again int he future#but im probably not gonna stop dying my hair#i like doing that 👍#might be able to use it a lot to have fun with my hair while im growing it out#oh and#the color of my hair in the drawing is a lot darker than it turned out#i just accidentally put brown down when i wasnt looking at the photo#and couldnt erase it
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How to make your writing sound less stiff
Just a few suggestions. You shouldn’t have to compromise your writing style and voice with any of these, and some situations and scenes might demand some stiff or jerky writing to better convey emotion and immersion. I am not the first to come up with these, just circulating them again.
1. Vary sentence structure.
This is an example paragraph. You might see this generated from AI. I can’t help but read this in a robotic voice. It’s very flat and undynamic. No matter what the words are, it will be boring. It’s boring because you don’t think in stiff sentences. Comedians don’t tell jokes in stiff sentences. We don’t tell campfire stories in stiff sentences. These often lack flow between points, too.
So funnily enough, I had to sit through 87k words of a “romance” written just like this. It was stiff, janky, and very unpoetic. Which is fine, the author didn’t tell me it was erotica. It just felt like an old lady narrator, like Old Rose from Titanic telling the audience decades after the fact instead of living it right in the moment. It was in first person pov, too, which just made it worse. To be able to write something so explicit and yet so un-titillating was a talent. Like, beginner fanfic smut writers at least do it with enthusiasm.
2. Vary dialogue tag placement
You got three options, pre-, mid-, and post-tags.
Leader said, “this is a pre-dialogue tag.”
“This,” Lancer said, “is a mid-dialogue tag.”
“This is a post-dialogue tag,” Heart said.
Pre and Post have about the same effect but mid-tags do a lot of heavy lifting.
They help break up long paragraphs of dialogue that are jank to look at
They give you pauses for ~dramatic effect~
They prompt you to provide some other action, introspection, or scene descriptor with the tag. *don't forget that if you're continuing the sentence as if the tag wasn't there, not to capitalize the first word after the tag. Capitalize if the tag breaks up two complete sentences, not if it interrupts a single sentence.
It also looks better along the lefthand margin when you don’t start every paragraph with either the same character name, the same pronouns, or the same “ as it reads more natural and organic.
3. When the scene demands, get dynamic
General rule of thumb is that action scenes demand quick exchanges, short paragraphs, and very lean descriptors. Action scenes are where you put your juicy verbs to use and cut as many adverbs as you can. But regardless of if you’re in first person, second person, or third person limited, you can let the mood of the narrator bleed out into their narration.
Like, in horror, you can use a lot of onomatopoeia.
Drip Drip Drip
Or let the narration become jerky and unfocused and less strict in punctuation and maybe even a couple run-on sentences as your character struggles to think or catch their breath and is getting very overwhelmed.
You can toss out some grammar rules, too and get more poetic.
Warm breath tickles the back of her neck. It rattles, a quiet, soggy, rasp. She shivers. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. If she doesn’t look, it’s not there. Sweat beads at her temple. Her heart thunders in her chest. Ba-bump-ba-bump-ba-bump-ba- It moves on, leaving a void of cold behind. She uncurls her fists, fingers achy and palms stinging from her nails. It’s gone.
4. Remember to balance dialogue, monologue, introspection, action, and descriptors.
The amount of times I have been faced with giant blocks of dialogue with zero tags, zero emotions, just speech on a page like they’re notecards to be read on a stage is higher than I expected. Don’t forget that though you may know exactly how your dialogue sounds in your head, your readers don’t. They need dialogue tags to pick up on things like tone, specifically for sarcasm and sincerity, whether a character is joking or hurt or happy.
If you’ve written a block of text (usually exposition or backstory stuff) that’s longer than 50 words, figure out a way to trim it. No matter what, break it up into multiple sections and fill in those breaks with important narrative that reflects the narrator’s feelings on what they’re saying and whoever they’re speaking to’s reaction to the words being said. Otherwise it’s meaningless.
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Hope this helps anyone struggling! Now get writing.
#writing#writing advice#writing resources#writing a book#writing tools#writing tips#writeblr#for beginners#refresher#sentence structure#book formatting
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I'm going to say something controversial. I think there's something Veilguard does better than any other Dragon Age game. Namely: incorporating the companions into the plot.
Look, I love Origins as much as everyone. But to be frank: you could cut every companion except Alistair, Morrigan and Loghain and the plot could still work. Once you've finished the mission where you recruit a companion, there aren't other main quests that involve them in any way.
Oghren and Wynne could have stayed home after their recruitment missions for all the difference it would make to the main plot. Sten, Leliana and Zevran could vanish and nothing would change, because once they're on your team, they don't interact with the main plot at all. (There's the Temple of Sacred Ashes, I suppose - but even then, you'd be going on that quest whether Leliana and Wynne were there or not, and it's very telling that they can both die here and next to nothing in the rest of the game is impacted.)
Again: I love Origins. This doesn't detract from any of these characters being great, or from the story being great. It just means there's a layer of separation between the two. They're involved in the story, but they're not driving it, and you seldom get to see them have strong feelings about it.
DA2 is a huge step up. Your companions' personal stories are integral parts of the main plot. You can't do the Deep Roads expedition without witnessing Karl's death and its impact on Anders. You can't enter Act 2 without seeing Varric's brother betray him, or watching your sibling either die or begin a new path in life. Act 2's climax happens because of choices Isabela and Aveline have made. Act 3's endgame is all about Anders making one enormous decision. Even Fenris and Merrill, who have the fewest ties to the plot, have strong reasons to be invested in the Mage/Templar conflict.
And then Inquisition just... backslides. There are multiple companions you don't need to recruit at all, or can send away with zero alteration to the main plot. Your companions don't like Corypheus because he's bad, but no one - except maybe Varric - has any strong personal feelings about him. They have no personal stake in defeating him, not like Alistair has a personal stake in opposing Loghain, or Anders in opposing Meredith.
We go to the Winter Palace, and Vivienne is not made a part of that story. We have a whole subplot about the Wardens, and Blackwall only gets a couple of extra lines, if you even bring him. Their personal arcs could have been somehow impacted by these missions, and they're just... not. Sera is packed with internalised self-hatred that manifests as trying to distance herself from elven culture, to the point of sometimes lashing out at other elves. And despite all the missions you do where elven history features... Sera's growth past that flaw happens entirely offscreen between the base game and Trespasser?????
IMO, this is one of the biggest reasons why Corypheus is such a bland villain. He doesn't make anyone grow, except by starting a plot for them to be part of. He doesn't challenge them emotionally. No one is invested in him. Because no one interacts with the darn plot.
Veilguard, though? Veilguard keeps your companions interacting with the story the whole way through. The Treviso/Minrathous choice affects both Lucanis and Neve heavily, and impacts who they become for the rest of the game. These cities are personal to you, even if you're not a Crow or Shadow Dragon, because your companions love them.
The Siege of Weisshaupt is beyond personal to Davrin and Lucanis, both of whom are entrusted with major parts of the quest: trying to kill the archdemon and Ghilan'nain. Lucanis is affected by his failure to kill Ghilan'nain for ages afterward. Davrin is haunted by survivor's guilt; he should have died when he struck down the archdemon. He's alive. How can he live with that?
Whenever killing the gods becomes a possibility, Rook hands the lyrium dagger to Lucanis. When the squad go to fight the gods' dragons with the Wardens, Taash is the one to flush the first dragon out. When you infiltrate the Venatori, Neve tricks your way in, and everything that happens is especially weighty to Bellara, whose people have been abducted. On Tearstone Island, because of how Lucanis and Spite have grown, they strikes true.
Did you not hate Elgar'nan before that mission? Because you probably will after you watch him capture Bellara or Neve, and see his fellow god kill Harding or Davrin.
You know what's a great piece of writing? There's no reason Emmrich shouldn't have been an option to deal with the wards on Tearstone Island; he's one of the ideal options to take out more wards with the Veil Jumpers in the final mission. But you can't select him to do it. Because Emmrich has far less personal investment in the Elgar'nan battle than the other two. This is Neve's city. This is the monster who tries to call himself Bellara's god. The game makes sure the characters who take control of the Blight at the end are the ones with the greatest stakes in doing so.
One of your companions, not you, wrests command of the Blight from Elgar'nan. The final mission depends on how well you've come to know each companion's skills. They're just... always involved.
And they're invested, too. The companions all have serious personal reasons to hate the antagonists by the end. Lucanis and Neve have either seen their city burn, or know it happened at the cost of their friend's (and potential partner's) hometown. Davrin has seen his order devastated. These are Bellara's and Davrin's supposed gods, and instead of helping the elves reclaim their history and culture, they're trying to enslave the world. Harding learns that the Evanuris maimed and destroyed her Titan ancestors.
Emmrich and Taash have perhaps the smallest emotional tie - and sadly I do think Emmrich especially gets underutilized in the plot. But heck, Taash is still hella motivated by the way the gods are abusing dragons. And Emmrich is tied thematically to the main conflict. He's facing the question of immortality, while nigh-immortal beings are right in front of him, proving how that gift can be abused. The final choice of his personal arc is whether he's willing to embrace his personal, mortal attachments, at the cost of consequences that terrify him... you know, the same question that Solas faces at the end.
And don't even get me started on how everyone is emotionally tied to Solas. Harding and Neve watched him kill Varric in front of them. Everyone not dead or captured has to watch him drag Rook into the Fade. Just about every companion faces some kind of huge regret or failure at some point, in constant foreshadowing for Solas's prison of regret: both the literal one he sticks Rook in, and the mental one of his own making.
Veilguard has its problems, but it absolutely shines at keeping its characters involved and invested in the main story. It gives them things to do, it gives them reasons to care. For all the flaws this game has, this part is good writing.
#things I liked about Veilguard#datv#da:tv#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard
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my recommended tags stuff keeps giving me octopath n 999 tags next to each other n its making me. think
#cyrus albright u would do wonders in a ze game god bless#that man Loves to infodump and learn abt things so much he forgets abt danger. hed literally be thriving here#counting Kit theres the perfect amount of octopath ch to take part in a nonary game. or the ab game. or whatever the other one is#my mind keeps saying zero win game but i cant remember if thats just the one kay came up with or if thats the actual games name#the 'player' could be kit maybe .. or choose who to be.. the narrative could be interesting from each perspective ........#only problem is id have to make either the game change to fit octopath 1's world#or. make modern versions of the octopath characters . which could be interesting but also no thanks <3#imaging how one would even create an escape room type thing in a techless fantasy world is kind of interesting actually ..#< my ass is procrastinating like hell rn#octotag
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