#maybe i should just skip class
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typingwithmyhandstied · 3 months ago
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tw vent
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magentagalaxies · 10 months ago
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#i should've just gatekept scott thompson from my college bc the way my college is treating me right now is bullshit#like i don't even want to do the scott event anymore bc of how they're treating me but i kind of have to#and i know i should be grateful they're even letting me be one of the interviewers but i hate being a student so much#i hate how nobody respects my opinion or input or experience even tho i'm literally the reason scott's even doing this event#(and ESPECIALLY the reason he's willing to do it for free!!)#and it especially stings bc scott has never made me feel like my insights were worth less because i'm a student#like he's always been one of the few people who consistently treat me like we're equals even tho he doesn't have to#and the way my college is treating me. it's like they don't trust me to not be an annoying little kid#like they're just assuming scott doesn't respect me so they don't have to respect me either#i mean on the plus side i'm supposed to have another phone call with scott either today or tomorrow so i can probably explain the situation#like i don't want to make him feel negatively about my college i want him to have a good time#but this treatment is genuinely fucking with my self confidence#and also maybe i can harness scott's power to hear ''don't talk about this thing'' and immediately make the interview all about this thing#(except in this case it would be him treating me like an equal instead of a random student)#and there's a bunch of bullshit currently going on with the class i have right after the event#so even tho originally i was like ''awesome i have the perfect schedule to bring scott to all of my classes!!''#i might just ask scott if he wants to skip class together and hang out. like i never promised that class anything#the only thing i *have* to do is the interview. the class we'd be skipping is already being like#''oh are you sure scott wants to visit the class i don't want to take him away from a better use of his time''#and scott was genuinely excited to see what my classes were like!! even if y'all didn't treat him like a big celebrity!!#but y'know what i'm sure scott does have a better use of his time. and i do too.#i'm gonna do the interview event bc i have to (we're in too deep at this point)#and i might ask scott if he wants to talk to that freshman film class about the buddy cole doc#bc 1. they offered to pay scott for that (they can't legally pay me but that's why i made the joke about money laundering)#2. since it's about the doc it's the one class where i get to be treated like an actual person#but other than that. damn it i was excited to share this part of my life with scott but fuck that this part of my life sucks#i'm gonna have a good time with scott in boston and my college is only going to be as much a part of is as they have to be#because we ARE friends (scott said so!) and i AM a brilliant filmmaker (bruce said so!) and i DO have potential (bellini said so!)#even tho it is hard to internalize those things after how much yesterday fucked me up. but that's ok scott will call again soon
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itissadbutitsmy-artblog · 10 months ago
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i think brain wizard just likes to hear him talk. it's not like hes gonna be talking much after they do what they want to do to him :) half spaders teachers want to turn him into a god i think hes gonna pick up on it cuz i dont think they can act normal around him
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orangerainforest · 10 months ago
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🌻
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racke7 · 11 months ago
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Me vs FF14 part... 2?
It's taken me pretty much three full days of running from cutscene to cutscene. But I've finally reached Heavensward.
And like... on some level? I'm kind of offended?
Like, a part of me genuinely wants to replay the entire game from the start "as something else" (different main-class, different race, different starting-area, whichever), because the dungeon-queuing system is actually really fun when you start to Understand it.
As in, FF14 has somehow made an MMO that has almost eliminated the feeling that it is a level-grind? Partially? It's turned the whole thing into a surprisingly comfortable level of (limited, but genuine) social interaction.
To the point where even someone who isn't obsessively grind-focused like me, can genuinely enjoy themselves. Just queuing up for dungeons, Hunting some bounties, and-...
And then FF14 has so many fucking quests that it literally chokes the life out of the gameplay.
As an example, one of their biggest dungeon-draws (bcs high rewards) is a quest that almost everyone hates playing. Because doing that dungeon means watching literally eighteen minutes of unskippable cutscenes.
And that's with them having reduced the amount of cutscenes in that dungeon, because the players complained so much about them.
Like... I'd be perfectly happy replaying the game from the start with a different character, even knowing that leveling isn't some kind of pain-free thing. But the thought of having to restart the fucking Main-Quest? Of having to spend literal days just running back-and-forth to cutscenes?
I'm currently feeling a bit burned-out as a result of the binge I went on to get here, but I'm pretty damn sure that I wouldn't replay this fucking thing even if you paid me for it.
(And, of course, Heavensward also has a Main-Quest continuation that you have to follow. And now I'm not even allowed to fly everywhere to cut down on the "running back-and-forth"-part of my complaints. Not until they arbitrarily allow me to discover flight for the new areas, by going through even more of the Main-Quest.)
(Not to mention that now I have to go back and do even more Class-quests, with their own cutscenes, in order to unlock a bunch of skills.)
(I'm very fond of the "the church is evil because it doesn't let you fuck dragons"-meme, and I'm very much seeing it. But like... come the fuck on. Why is this MMO a feature-length movie-series? Why can't I just play the game and have fun?)
#and yes. i'm very much aware that ''you can do anything with one character''#bcs everyone gets one (1) race-changing potion. and classes can be switched out super-easily. but that's not the point.#video games#ff14#rants#personal stuff#also like... i'm unemployed and waiting for my classes to begin a few weeks from now. i have INFINITE free-time.#and i still feel like ff14 is actively trying to waste my time by ''telling a story'' that should be in a single-player game.#... actually. that'd explain a lot. did the writers of this game learn to write from single-player games?#is that why there are so many cutscenes and minor characters to constantly juggle? did nobody tell them that they were making an MMO?#(the feeling of going ''all-in'' on the genuineness in the cutscenes even when it's corny as shit? good.)#(being forced to sit through cutscene after cutscene instead of actually playing the game? bad.)#like... even just the dungeon-cutscenes? to some degree it's expected that you SHOULD skip them? bcs you're making others wait?#(and during the Raids. that means outright being left behind. ain't nobody stopping for anyone.)#so you're losing a massive bit of story-telling. bcs it's trying to tell that story in the WORST place.#it's a good story? i guess? but it's so fucking inconvenient to _play the game around_ that it feels more like a chore than an adventure.#and in a single-person game? i think it'd be great. maybe not entirely my kettle of fish. but genuinely good. but as an MMO?#like i get that a lot of it has been added onto it over the span of YEARS and that ppl playing it since launch would've been desperate#for new content. despite how the amount of content seems incredibly overwhelming for new players.#but jesus fuck. at least let people wanting to start a new character to just... skip the fucking thing? they've already seen it once.#* nevermind. they thought of that. they're selling ''story-skip''-potions for 10$. wow. just... wow.
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watery-melon-baller · 11 months ago
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what if you were a girl trying to change her major and you wanted to take a class but your schedule from hell said no. and you were also on the verge of a mental breakdown
#i want. to change my major#but I don't know how much I will like this new major and I am hesitant to just jump right in and start it#so I was like ah I should take a class from the new major along with my old major classes#so if I like my current/old major I can keep going with it#and if I like the new major then I actually know#that way I'm not going in blind and risking hating it especially this new major I'm trying is a difficult major#but the only way to take this specific class is to drop the class with my favorite teacher in it :(#i don't even know. if I like my major or not. Like maybe I just do. Idk I'm like. It's okay but I'm not passionate about it#I don't know what the fuck I wanna do#i could take this other class at 9am that's super gross I guess#but then that leaves me with a single hour lecture in the middle of the afternoon on Thursday#and I know me. there's a very high chance I will just skip it and sleep in#Or I could just continue with my current classes#But then either I A. Do the sample next semester which is bad bc if I already hate my major I don't wanna keep doing it next semester#Or B. I immediately switch my major and go in blind which I don't wanna do either in case I hate that too!#Also issue with the 9am class: it's a lot of calc and physics and I don't. Know physics lmao#the class where I have to drop my fav teacher has subjects I'm a lot more familiar/comfortable with so I'd rather do that#i really like my teacher tho she's my fav :(#and my only other option besides the fav teacher is a mystery professor so idk if she's any good#sigh.#either I continue with current classes#drop the fav teacher to get into the class I want and risk having a sucky teacher for that other second class#or I just take my chances with the 9am and hope my lack of physics doesn't completely fail me#I don't know what to do my schedule sucks so much#hnfffffffgggggg#i really wanna take the new major class but I don't know if I want to drop the other class with my fav teacher#this is super vague and confusing but I'm trying not to give out too many details#i have like. A week and a half to decide and I'm super stressed about it so not fun for me#i might try and find out what the other teacher is like beforehand but I just worry#lilac post
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cartoon-skeleton · 1 year ago
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To be completely honest today is my birthday
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see sometimes I try and think about it all more logically. what if it was all happening to a friend. my friend!! you completely forgot to feed your kitten his wet food for five days? you haven't drunk water for a couple of days? you didn't shower or change your clothes for four days? you've only eaten two actual meals in the last two days? your average sleep in the last week is around five hours? my friend, you need help.
since it's me, I don't need help.
#most of it has been genuine forgetfulness/zoning out and 'oh it's 2am'#but like. last night i was lying awake hungry as anything bc all I had was dinner and not a great deal of that. if id been in a house on my#own i would've hopped up and got smth but i couldn't in case of disturbing grandma#(I have since purchased things that I will store near my bed that I can either take out of there#or leave them there for any such emergencies. if you call them emergencies. sometimes if i can't handle eating normally if i can't see what#im eating i can manage that - makes it less real somehow.)#honestly tho i am shocked by how immediately all my carefully created routines have fallen apart tbh#should i talk to my lecturer at uni who does the 12-2 class? to check she's ok with me eating in class? bc otherwise i will likely not eat#anything before dinnertime. probably skip breakfast#i don't know. i don't know anything. i love my course i love it so much and i don't know how i'll handle it#but i don't think i'd handle not doing it#idk im just so tired man#depression does a number on you frfr#okay that's it im turning on the heater finding some music and doing a lil dance. see if i feel better. maybe try a bit of hot water with#ginger or smth livening in it. i do want to try that. something to wake you up. ive been in a dead depressed limbo for five hours straight#and done nothing of use#tw ed#good news tho i find my anxiousness overall reduces the more depressed i am xD idk why lol#personal#puddleglum hours
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ningningkittie · 11 months ago
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#i havent been wanting to get out of bed in the morning at all lately :((#i just dont want to :((#today i should be going to the gym w my mom nd then stop by the store nd library#tmrw i have to go to school#but omg i rllyyyyy dont want to i wanna cry#i feel like skipping it today even if then i dont get the book i wanna read bc they'll send it back today#plus there r some things i'd like to get at the store. but ugh i just wanna stay in bed and stay in my room#and i had an unpleasant dream of my school years :/#i dream of that and my class all the time and it fills me w such anxiety :(#stuff like that. that anxiety most ppl fill me w. reminds me how badly i only want to be w him#but maybe it's ruined now. bc of miscommunication.... i havent even dared checking the app#bc im sooooooo scared to open it and be met w the unread sign. that he hasnt even seen my messages#that'll hurt me so much so i just dont even open the app. now i have no idea if he's seen it or not nd thats all i can deal with atm#it makes me so sad tho bc if he rlly wanted to he could have me. and i have such a big heart w sm love to give to someone :((((#he's like the one person i've met who fills me w calm instead of that anxiety#which is somewhat funny to say bc he also makes me so sad sometimes :(( nd frustrated#but ohhh even now all i can think abt is being w him nd having a future. even if idk if nd when we'll even simply talk again skskksksk#sighhhhhh i was so happy to have talked to him almost every day the past week... i have things i wanna share w him constantly!!!!! but then#i ofc made a mistake w i always do. i just wish ppl could come to me nd talk abt it instead of just getting upset and pulling away :((
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gideonisms · 2 years ago
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grits teeth this anxiety is just an excuse to treat myself better that's all this is telling me. It's just the sign to go on more walks and make myself my favorite tea and read more. Things that WILL feel good and luxurious so help me
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year ago
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#sometimes u just gotta have a cringe fail weekend. is what i tell myself bc i let the fact that i forgot to check my new#email completely obliterate me. also i haven't been sleeping enough. also just the normal thoughts in my head#by which i mean the part of my brain that demands consequences for inattention by means of suffering. devine punishment.#which is irrational and annoying but knowing that doesnt seem to help. so ive just been laying here in the hopes i come unspooled and start#to disintegrate. which is annoying bc ive got stuff to do#specifically bc i am supposed to b a TA this semester. which is what i figured but also feared#so. thats gonna b a lot. tho not as much as my old school bc they dont make TAs do literally everything here apparently#but. itll b a lot. and also i have to finish signing up for classes. bc i didnt do that back in April by my brain was melting. also i have#to keep doing my job and dealing with my data. ugh. well. being a TA isnt so bad. i do like to help ppl learn even if im not very good at it#like. i struggle with thr talking to ppl part. like the transition of ny thoughts to something thst makes sense#oh well. hope i end up teaching something im not too unqualified for. i could do soils. Ecology. uhhh. maybe intro bio but i never even took#university level biology. i just skipped upper level courses. that's probably it. anything else would b a lotta faking it#ugh. im tired. i should go to sleep at 9pm. thr sun hasbt even set and i should sleep#tomorrow i have to get my shit together. but also i wanna email my new professor like hey bro like what do u want me to do???#like how do i start in this lab? when do we start talking. like just not to b pushy but whats thr procedure?#i like Structure but also its like weeks until the semester starts so we got time. im just a lil nuts#jesus. its gonna b an interesting semester. hopefully fun but uh it is sorta like taking a boat out when u can see big ominous clouds#like im sure ill b fine but also i might get dumped over into a watery grave. i just. i have a lot of papers to write#and its gonna b hard to b a student on top of that. partly bc what im gonna b doing now is almost completely unrelated#which is probably y ppl stick to the same track they stsrt on. that awkward moment when ppl ask u if ur gonna keep working with bi0crust#and ur like uhhhh no fuck that actually the work ive done in the past 4 years makes me hate myself✌️#so we r back at square 1. well not 1 bc its sorta related but its a pretty big reset#itll b fine once things start. its just thr anticipation that kills me#unrelated
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consulaaris · 2 years ago
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had some wild nightmares last night and woke up panicky & still exhausted so i skipped my class this morning, but now i’m anxious about that lmao
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fappellmoan · 2 years ago
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is it dramatic to skip my class tmrw just because i didn’t get my footage shot and will not be getting that done today
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slippery-minghus · 6 months ago
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oof. going to the gym today was the opposite of helpful for my pain levels. gah
#seasons! are! changing!#and i've! been stressed! as hell! from work!#my neck is wound so fucking tight#that i can feel it in my *eyes*#at least my friend already knew the moves we learned in bjj today so she was able to be very gentle with her attacks#we learned a shoulder attack that if you rven *let go* wrong you could do serious damage#at one point the instructor was talking her through another move and i had to keep tapping out before he could show her how to do anything#just the position alone was miserable#i have a lot of fun at bjj but my body can't fucking keep up#part of me wonders if it's an issue of not going often *enough*. like maybe if i suffer though breaking the ceiling ive hit it'll get easier#but i don't know if i can break through without burning out on the way. and without getting *significantly* stronger just once a week is too#much for me. and i can feel the difference if i skip a week. my body needs So much conditioning to maintain any level of strength#it's like trying to fill a balloon you can't tie off. as soon as the high pressure airflow stops the balloon deflates#i've always been like that. and it's stark enough that i wonder if it's a symptom of some underlying issue#but i'm going to give bjj another month or two (and ideally some time with a schedule that means i can go to the wednesday class too)#but i need to seriously consider how sustainable this is. bc as much as i enjoy it i dread it in equal measure#and i've felt like garbage all day because i had to push myself so hard. i was worn out just from the 10min walk to get there and#stretching to get warmed up. i was maybe two minutes from mustering the courage to go back home when my friend finally showed up#i'm trying very hard to set aside the feelings of failure and shame at the thought of quitting bjj.#bc i'm fat Of Course i should be trying to exercise and lose weight! i need to be constantly repenting for the sin of my body!!!!#im not at all doing bjj to lose weight or anything like that. but the *impression* of what it would mean to an outside viewpoint still hurts#and in the end the thing i've gotten out of bjj was my new group of friends (been nearly 6mo already!!)#and they mean far more to me than anything i could gain from bjj as a sport#personal
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raksh-writes · 8 months ago
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Gosh, my neck is just really determined to kill me today, what in the hell??
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corkinavoid · 3 months ago
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DPxDC "Pick Me Up"
The stream goes live on the first day of the school year. It's the usual song and dance - mad laughing, threats, poor jokes, terror, and about thirty kids huddled together in a classroom behind Joker's back. Tim recognizes it as one of the Gotham Academy classrooms. Dick can't imagine the horror those kids' parents must be feeling right now. Jason jokes about middle school traumatic experiences. Damian is feeling very justified for skipping classes today.
Bruce, all suited up in his Batman garb, is making his way to the Academy as fast as he possibly can. Those are kids.
Gotham is once again anxiously kept on the edge of their seats, watching as Joker decides to interview the kids on their learning experience so far. Something about leaving a good first impression on the new generation or some other bullshit. Most kids stutter over their words - it's true that Gothamites are way more composed when facing life-threatening events, but those kids are only fourteen or fifteen for the most part. They are not old enough to keep their cool in the face of a murder clown.
That is, until Joker points his camera at one of the girls. Black hair in a high ponytail, blue eyes without a trace of fear, a slightly displeased, even bored expression on her face. She looks straight into the camera, not even waiting for the laughing madman to finish his question, and deadpans:
"I don't think I like school. Pick me up, please."
Joker sputters.
"Not so scared, I see," he sneers, and, in the next moment, a comically large gun painted in purples and greens is pointed to the girl's forehead, "How about now?"
The girl scrunches her nose and makes a so-so gesture.
"It's kinda meh," she admits, "Like, yeah, points for style, but you know, size doesn't matter. It's all in the technique."
Dick snorts over the comms. It's a bad time for laughing, sure, but the phrase caught him off-guard. This is not what you'd expect to hear from a teen, and definitely not something you'd expect anyone to say to the Joker. Jason's comms are muted, but Barbara knows he also laughed a little.
"Technique, you say?" Joker hisses, pressing the gun closer to the girl's head, and she winces, leaning away from it, almost as if she is disgusted by the touch.
"Yeah, I mean, guns are not that scary anyway. What are you gonna do with them, blast my brains all over the floor? Been there, done that," the girl shrugs, "Kinda nasty, but overall, it's just like slime, only sticky." She pauses and looks to the side, seemingly lost in thought, "Huh, maybe we should have added Borax to it. Or was it baking soda?.."
"Listen here, you little brat," Joker's fingers catch the girl's chin, and his voice becomes sickeningly menacing. Bruce is almost there, just two more minutes. Tim is already grappling onto the wall.
But none of them get to finish.
"Put your dirty fingers away from my sister," a low, cold, and even in a way that speaks of barely contained fury, voice comes from out of the screen.
The camera spins, like whoever is holding it turned really fast, and everyone watching the stream sees a fairly normal guy standing by the window - a turtleneck and ripped jeans, same black hair as the girl, same blue eyes... Wait, they are not blue.
And that's not a guy.
The camera falls down to the floor, and there are a lot of panicked screams coming from the broadcast now, but none of them sound like children's voices. It's the screams of adults, of grown-ass men, and later, someone even claimed they heard Joker's scream among them, too. The picture on camera glitches a few times, and the angle is awkward, but everyone still gets to see how shadows in the room morph into eyes, wide open and green, and how the darkness grows sharp teeth, countless grinning mouths that don't belong to any faces.
Screams turn into gargling and then to quiet whispers, filling the ears of all those listening with countless words in languages they don't know.
Red Robin turns off the recording and looks to that same guy from the levestream, sitting across him on the couch. The guy - Daniel, or Danny, as he introduced himself - looks him in the eyes and raises an eyebrow.
"Okay, and?"
"How did you do it?" Tim asks for the third time this evening. Danny blinks.
"Did what?" He asks, completely incomprehending. Tim groans. He's been trying to get his answers, any answers at this point, from the guy for thirty fucking minutes already. So far, he's got nothing. Danny, whoever the fuck he is, proves to be the most annoying human being on Earth.
"Seven people in a coma, including Joker himself, with no physical injuries and none of the children remember a thing! How?!" He demands, and a girl's face peeks from around the corner:
"I remember!"
Tim snaps his head at her, "What do you remember?"
The girl pauses, blinks, and looks to Danny. Then shrugs, "My brother picked me up from school."
Tim drops his head down and breathes out in frustration. He can't force the information out of civilians, he is a vigilante, not a mafia.
"Would it make you feel better if I promise not to do it again?" Danny asks, and his voice is way too innocent for Tim to believe him. He raises his head to look the guy in his shameless, amused eyes.
"I hate you."
"Thanks," Danny grins.
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