#maybe i just like how he looks in leather

[gracieheartspedro]

Nobody Likes A Secret

pairing: no outbreak rich older!joel miller x afab reader.

how to help the palestinians and what it means to write for the last of us characters

word count: 3k words

description: a rich wealthy playboy who becomes enthralled by his neighbor's daughter. it never ends well when he can not fathom having happiness for himself.

warnings: ANGSTY!!!!!, age gap (joel is in his 50s, reader is in her mid 20s), wealthy!joel, neighbor!joel, reader is pretty naive and delusional, taboo relationship troupe, mentions of parent death, VERY BRIEF SMUT, joel is borderline evil and very mean. joel calls reader "kid". joel is also a liar. talks of having children.

author’s note: I wrote this all in like... two nights. I listened to illicit affair by taylor swift and nobody likes a secret by lizzy mcalpine a lil much and it ended up here. sorry if I make you sad.

You creep into the large 4-car garage, seeing Joel pacing the oil-stained floor. He’s still in his work clothes, but he looks a bit disheveled. His eyes are wild, his face downturned into a deep-set frown. 

“Joel? Everything okay?”

He shakes his head. “He knows.”

You know only one person who would ruin this. 

‘This’ being an 9-month-long affair with your older neighbor. Months and months of meeting in dark corners, hardly ever seeing each other in the light. 

“How?”

Joel fumbles trying to pull his phone out of his pocket, showing you the 5 missed calls from your Dad. You stare at it blankly, tightening your jaw at the possibility that your Dad is too smart for his own good. Shit, he does know, doesn’t he? He throws the phone down on a nearby leather couch that is positioned near a workbench. Joel was pretty good with his hands, but lately his mind has been anywhere but tinkering with wood in his garage. 

“He came over an hour ago. Sat me down and told me that he was getting suspicious of some outings you’ve had over the last couple months. Said he realized you were not going to the places you said you were going to. So he assumed you had a new boyfriend or something. Then last night…”

You curl your hands into a fist. “Fuck.”

“Yeah. Fuck,” Joel grumbles, running his hands over his face, dragging his lower lids down in frustration, “He said that if I know anything or see anything, I am to let him know immediately. He’s worried you’re fuckin’ around with the wrong guy.”

You had snuck out of your house last night and tiptoed your way into Joel’s car, which was parked in a nearby cul de sac. He promised you a nice late dinner in the city and then he ravished you in a hotel room you two didn’t even spend the night in. He brought you home around 4 am and you snuck back into your bedroom, ensuring nothing in your home was stirred. When you woke up the next morning, your father left you a note that he wanted to do dinner with you that night. Meaning tonight. 

You know this is detrimental, and while you do not want to freak out immediately, you can not help but feel like someone is stabbing you directly in the chest. Joel’s body language is giving off negative signals, so even though you want to hug him and tell him that you can talk to your Dad, you know it’s not going to change much.

Your eyes well with tears, thinking of how this was going to ruin everything. After months and months, you thought you were being so smart.

“We can’t do this anymore,” He whispers.

And God damn, did Joel hate seeing you cry. 

But the tear-filled eyes you are giving him are warranted. You don’t turn away from him like usual. You never wanted to show him any weakness. 

This time you confront him, your nose turning upward and your eyes full of disdain. 

“You said we were being careful,” You murmur, the salty tears falling down your cheeks.

“Not careful enough.”

The bitterness tastes like blood in your mouth. You want to scream at him but keep an even tone instead, “Joel… Just let me talk to him.”

“You knew where this was gonna end up,” He states plainly, his voice not wavering. 

And maybe he was right, but you enjoyed living in a loved-up delusion. Maybe it was the sex or maybe it was the looks he gave you from across densely populated parties you were forced to go to. You would put on a show long enough to make your father happy and then you would somehow sneak away with Joel. You knew if your father caught you with the much older man, he would lose his mind, so you were always cautious. You made sure the doors were locked. The moans would stay hushed. The car was parked far from your front door. And during the time spent away from the house, you would get a girlfriend to lie for you. You were always so careful. 

“Maybe he suspects it’s someone else.” you try to reassure him, but you know it’s falling on deaf ears.

“You know he knows it’s me.”

“We don’t know that for sure.”

Joel rolls his eyes. He knows that your father’s words were simply a warning. If you two continued this schtick, you know better than anyone your father would find out. You knew he already kind of had eyes on you and Joel had caught on to a couple of neighbors watching him from their bedroom windows. He gives your father credit, he was thorough. 

“We have to stop.”

You did not realize how much your heart was banking on making this work. Joel was about 25 years older, so deep down, you knew that no one would accept the relationship. But in your wildest fantasies, you imagined you two would run away together. He had tons of money, you had nothing tying you down, and it could be a perfect escape. You had brought it up one night after you snuck over to his bed and he didn’t explicitly say no. He just giggled and continued tracing circles on your bare back. 

You bite the inside of your cheek, “So you just… don’t want me anymore?”

He huffs, already annoyed you were making it seem like he had a choice.

“It was never gonna work out in the first place, kid.”

You just stare at him. The nickname hit harder than it ever has. After months of sneaking around with you, Joel only ever saw you as that. A kid. 

“Don’t call me that. Ever.”

He notices the rise in your voice and quickly realizes he made a mistake. 

“Listen-”

It’s like every terrible emotion you have ever had comes bubbling to the surface. The resentment you held towards him when he ignored your calls some nights. Or when he refused to get near you at any party. You had your grievances, but you sat there like a good girl and just accepted him the way he was.

It’s like acid in your throat, it burns. 

“No, you listen,” You snap, “You don’t get to play the kid card. You chose this just as much as I did. You told me that my age didn’t matter. You told me that you would want children with me one day. You filled my head with all this bullshit and now when shit gets real, you walk away. You’re a fuckin’ coward, Joel.”

“My reputation and livelihood is on the line for this! You think I don’t still want those things?”

“If you wanted them bad enough, you would fight for me.”

It makes his face drop. His furrowed eyebrows relax and his mouth droops down into a subtle frown. 

You do not know where to go from here. The atmosphere in his garage rises with tension, words just hanging in the air. 

The Annual Miller Christmas Party was the talk of the town. Everyone who received an invitation would proudly display the cardstock on their huge fridges and show their uninvited neighbors to brag. When Joel came over to hand deliver you and your father’s invitations, he told you to wear something sparkly. 

You searched everywhere for the perfect gown for weeks. He had only really shown you attention when forced to be in the same room as you, so you needed to be eye-catching. He was never the guy to wave to you when he was leaving for work or say a quiet hello at the grocery store. Joel was a very regimented man. He never strayed away from his routine which was usually work, hookups with random women, and sleep. He never kept a woman around for too long. You noticed the circulation of women changed every month or so. Joel never wanted to settle down. He had tried that once 15 years ago and his ex ended up with half of his company. 

But you always loved the way the man carried him. Despite his playboy behavior, you were entranced with him. You always thought he was handsome and when you came home at 25 to help your mother who had fallen sick, you knew that your crush had morphed into borderline obsession. Living next to him would be dangerous.

The dress you chose was red, which was fitting for the occasion. And of course, it was sparkly. Just what Joel ordered. 

You spent all day preparing for the evening and when you showed up on his front door on your Father’s arm, he could not peel his eyes away. You were so radiant and perfect. The twinkle in your eyes shone brighter than the glitter on your gown. 

During the night, you drank a couple of glasses of champagne and chatted up some of your Father’s colleagues. You notice Joel’s eyes following you every so often. You can vividly remember thinking, “This man wants me so bad.”

That night Joel cornered you in the hallway by the bathroom. He asked you if you were interested in literature, but really he just wanted you alone in his study. You being you, you enthusiastically said yes and followed him down the unlit corridor. Once he shut the huge wooden double doors, you knew that you would be slipping out of that gown for him in no time. 

And that’s exactly what happened. 

He drove you crazy, peppering kisses all down your body. He would groan every time he heard your shaky breath, knowing that the effect he had on you would become a dependence for him. 

When he first pressed into you, it was different than any other woman he’s ever been with. You did not throw your head back, moaning obscenities. Instead, you stared into his eyes and nodded, encouraging him to continue his movements. It was so sensual and passionate, by the time you two finished, he held you in his arms for 20 minutes. He was never one for pillow talk or aftercare, so he surprised himself.

You were different than any other woman he had ever encountered. 

You had slipped over to his front door a couple of days after the Christmas party, knocking to ask his assistant if he was home. When she brought you into his office, he told his assistant to shut the door on the way out. His eyes never left yours as you bantered to him. He loved your confidence. He bent you over his desk after 10 minutes, tugging up your skirt and swatting your ass for showing up on his doorstep looking “this beautiful”. 

Joel always made you feel so good. His dirty talk went to Harvard. He could make you cum over and over with his husky Southern accent. Every time he called you “darlin’” or “princess”, you would come undone. 

A couple of months into the entanglement, your Mother’s health deteriorated overnight. You and your Father stayed by her side when she took her last breaths. It was devastating, seeing the woman you looked up to your entire life slowly slip away. You felt like a shell of a person, unable to really harbor any feeling other than pain.

Joel called you and let you know he would not be able to attend the funeral due to work commitments. You did not care, understanding that there’s never a good time for someone to die and he had no obligation to come. You arrived at the funeral home and saw a huge arrangement of purple and blue flowers. On the card, was scribbled in his handwriting. 

“What a breath of fresh air she was. Thinking of her family, always. Joel Miller.”

When it was time for the burial, you watched a large SUV pull up right before the final words were going to be spoken. Joel hopped out the back and slowly approached, keeping his distance from you and the rest of the attendees. Once she was lowered into the ground, Joel came over to give his condolences to your inconsolable father. 

You stayed back, watching everyone except him leave. You sat in the first row of fold-out chairs, watching them throw dirt over her casket. He sat down next to you, never saying anything. His hand extended out, touching your hand that was resting on your lap. It was an unspoken thing, but you never felt more seen in your entire life. He somehow knew exactly what you needed. 

Someone next to you.

After a couple of months, you felt more like yourself. You called him one night, asking if he was available for a drive. He parked his truck in your usual meet-up spot. You crawled up into the passenger seat and asked him to drive. You did not care where. You two caught up and once he could tell you were getting back to some semblance of yourself, he made his move. He was stopped at a red light when he placed his hand on your thigh. It was the first time you had sex in his truck. That night kickstarted the affair again, which led to the secret meetings in hotel rooms. You two got more bold with your rendezvous, even taking a weekend to the mountains. You don’t even remember the lie you told your Father as to why you were gone. 

Joel always thought you were capable. He admired you for being such a dynamic woman. To be so strong and delicate at the same time was unheard of. Even though you were much younger than him, you were well-versed in everything. You were professional and smart when it came to business. All the while, you were polite and empathetic. He would frequently come to you when he needed advice about work or an opinion on something ethical. He enjoyed hearing you ramble on about things you were passionate about. And God, did he love your laugh. 

He did not expect to keep you around as long as he did. But your body was like a drug and Joel had a nasty habit. You were always eager and available, and after a while, Joel started thinking maybe it was too much all at once. When you became comfortable enough to sleep over in his bed and make him breakfast, he knew his world was tilted on its axis. 

He needed to find a way to ruin it for himself, as he had done so many times before. 

He “slipped up” one night. As he and his chatty neighbor Jeff sat outside and smoked cigars, he spoke about his desire for you. He didn’t particularly say that you two were together, but simply insinuated that he would like to have you alone. And the rumors spread quickly. Soon enough a little birdie was in your Dad’s ear, feeding him information. 

Joel kept up the act with you, even though it was not really an act. He did like you, hell, he may have even loved you. But he did not want you to need him. So when people started paying more attention to you and him, he knew his plan was set in motion. In no time, it would all come crashing down. 

“If your Dad takes this to the board, I will lose my company. Do you understand that?”

You hated that you understood stupid business jargon. You knew that Joel losing his company would be devastating. But at this point, you could not care less. Because for as long as your affair, you watched his walls fall away. He had let you in more than once and in your delusional state, you believed for a second that he would choose you over his job. 

You clench your teeth as you suck in a sharp breath, tears still streaming down your warm face. 

“Yeah, I do.”

“Then we just end it. This has already gone too far.”

You finally turn away from him, your eyes falling to the concrete floor. As soon as he says those words, chills run down your arms. 

“You know Joel…” You drift off, using your shirt sleeve as a tissue. You wipe away a couple of tears and glare back up at him, “I would have given up everything in my life for this. My job. My relationship with my father. Everything. And the fact that you won’t even give me a chance to talk to my Dad to see if he could spare you and this whole charade, really fucking hurts. I’m not worth that to you and that… That’s what hurts the most.”

“Babe-”

“No. You don’t get to call me that anymore. You don’t get to call me anything.”

The tears flow again as you watch him exhale, his hands on his hips. His hair is unkept and the tie he’s wearing has been loosened. 

“I’m sorry,” Is all he can say while your lip quivers. You are trying not to lose it completely. 

You just shake your head, “No. You’re not sorry.”

He was. He was sorry, but he could not let you ruin everything. 

Joel would soon know that you were everything. And as you left the back door that evening, leaving behind the scent of your perfume, he knew that the smell would somehow taint his sheets, even though you had not been in them for weeks. He already started to miss the feeling of your lips. When he tried to go about his evening, he swore he would see you in the shadows of his large house. He even thought he heard your laugh. You were already haunting him even though the death of your relationship happened just hours before. 

You moved on after a couple of years. Met a guy at your 9-5, settled down, and popped out a few kiddos. Some nights you would lie awake, wondering to yourself if Joel was really happy. You never learned the truth of his deceit. After all, your Father was just grateful that his warning to Joel led to his desired outcome, which was him being gone from your life entirely. 

And Joel would be haunted for the rest of his life. No woman. No drugs. No party. Nothing ever filled the void you left behind. And it was all his fault. Just like it always had been.

[aquaticmercy]

Match

Summary : You finally found your intellectual match in Bucky Barnes.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x rare book dealer!reader (she/her) 

Warnings/tags : You and Bucky are nerds (affectionate), mentions of his past. Sexual tension-filled philosophical debate. DC comics exist in the MCU as literature as per the guardians Christmas special lol. Cursing? Steamy not smut. Fluff!!!!

Word count : 5.7k

Note : This fic was inspired by that one scene in FATWS where Bucky said he read the hobbit. I just really like the idea that Bucky really really likes to read. Enjoy!

Rare books were not just a job to you, but a vocation. You spent your days seeking out treasures, preserving them, and connecting them with people who could truly appreciate their worth. Your little shop was a haven of creaking wooden floors and shelves brimming with the worn spines of countless literary works, sunlight streaming through the tall windows.

It was your home.

On a quiet Tuesday, the bell over the door jingled.

At first, you assumed the man who walked in was lost or killing time— maybe a tourist who thought your shop was an antique or souvenir shop (you’ve gotten a lot of those over the years). 

He didn’t fit your usual profile of a customer—no tweed jackets or scholarly glasses. No suit and tie, no clean white blouse. This one was confident, albeit rough on the edges. His leather jacket and heavy boots belonged in a biker gang, his long hair brushing beautifully against his shoulders. But it was his left arm that drew your gaze—a sleek, black metal hand peeking out of his sleeve, rippling slightly when he moved.  

You recognized him instantly: James Buchanan Barnes. 

The former Winter Soldier. 

A man who belonged to history books and legends. Seeing him in person was... surreal. No article had prepared you for the magnetism he carried, no photo did him justice.

Still, you weren’t one to swoon. And you definitely weren’t about to let him see you staring a little too long into his steely blue eyes. 

“Can I help you?” you asked, keeping your voice calm and professional.

For a second, he seemed to weigh whether or not to answer. “I’m looking for a first edition of The Hobbit.”

You blinked.

That wasn’t what you’d expected. 

“It’s in the case over here,” you replied, recovering quickly. You led him to the glass display where one of your most cherished possessions lay nestled, secure and pristine.  

He muttered something like ‘just like I remember’ as he gazed at the book, his voice close to reverence.  

“Big fan?” you ventured, curious.

His lips curved up, into a faint smile. He nodded. “Always admired how he built entire worlds. The languages, the histories.” He hesitated, his voice growing quieter. “He lived through hell in the trenches, too. And from that, he wrote something… hopeful.”

You hadn’t expected that depth of understanding, and your surprise must have been obvious. “What?” he asked, amusement flickering in his eyes. “Didn’t think I’d be the type?”

This was going to be fun, you thought.

You shrugged, trying to suppress a grin, “you’re not exactly my usual Tolkien collector.”

That earned you a sweet, gentle chuckle. “I didn’t think I’d be either, but I’ve always loved books,” he admitted, “They were one of the only constants after...” His voice faltered, remnants of his past briefly flashing behind his eyes.

You didn’t press. Instead, you followed his lead, steering the conversation back to Tolkien. “You're right about the worldbuilding. He wrote a full mythology— linguistic and cultural foundations and all. It’s like he created an alternate history.”

“Exactly.” Bucky’s smile returned, brighter this time. It had been ages since Bucky had an engaging, meaningful conversation that wasn’t about mission planning, let alone about a book. The heated, faceless debates with internet strangers—each convinced they were ultimately correct—definitely didn’t count. “It’s that attention to detail— You don’t see that much anymore.”

After that, the two of you fell into a rhythm, talking easily for nearly an hour. About Tolkien’s works, his love for language, and the way war had shaped his narratives. You even mentioned how Tolkien’s own experiences in World War I echoed the camaraderie and loss found in his stories. Bucky nodded along, sharing personal observations that surprised you—not just because of their insight, but because of how much he genuinely cared.

Back in the day, everyone saw Bucky as the classic jock, and to be fair, he was. But beneath the effortless charm, he was a nerd at heart—fascinated by books, obsessed with science, and captivated by innovation. It was Bucky who had dragged Steve along to the World Exposition of Tomorrow, it was Bucky who was eager to see Howard Stark’s presentation on flying cars. Back then, the future had been his fixation. It had been out of reach— a world of endless possibilities. 

Now, he was drawn to the past. 

He’d fallen in love with reading again. After all, he had a century of literature to catch up on. And with the internet at his fingertips, he had access to more knowledge and stories than he could have dreamed of. 

40s Bucky would’ve had a heart attack from the sheer volume of information he could consume. For the first time in a long time, he wasn’t just chasing a vision of what might be—he was immersing himself in what already was.

Eventually, the conversation drifted to The Lord of the Rings. 

“Did you read the trilogy?” you asked.

He nodded. “Only a couple of years ago. I didn’t even realize it was published after… everything.” He paused, frowning slightly, as if reaching into the murky depths of his memory. 

Right. You did a quick mental tally based on the books you’ve read about him. The Hobbit was published in 1937, and The Fellowship of the Ring in 1954. Bucky was presumed killed in action in 1945 and captured by a terrorist organization. So, yeah—he’d missed it.

“Hydra,” you said the thought allowed before you could stop yourself.

You winced, bracing for impact. Oh no, you thought, have I crossed a line?

“You read about me?” he asked to your surprise, likely catching you deep in thought. 

You shrugged, trying to play it cool, though your heart still beat out your chest. “Superheroes are a popular topic for peer-reviewed journals and doctoral theses. There’s a whole academic subfield about the Winter Soldier— a lot about your role in the war, too.”

His expression was unreadable, but you thought you saw a flicker of something— amusement? Whatever it was, it eased the tension you had accidentally created, and the conversation resumed.

You’ve read plenty about Bucky Barnes—the sharpshooter of the Howling Commandos, Captain America’s trusted sniper. You’ve probably read more about him in the modern age: scholars debating the pardon of the Winter Soldier, professors discussing the Sokovia Accords— a conflict in which he’d been a major player in. You’d disagreed with the Accords, of course, but that’s a story for another time. 

Right now, your focus was on the man in front of you, talking about Tolkien and his wonderful languages. See, the peer-reviewed articles about him had painted a stark picture: a kind soul turned into a cold, unfeeling weapon. But they neglected to mention that even after everything, he was still a kind soul. In person, it was hard to reconcile the man before you with the image of a killer. 

The paper also failed to mention a pleasant surprise: his mind. You realised now that Bucky Barnes wasn’t just a soldier; he was sharp, curious, a man who loved literature and sought out conversations that challenged him. It was something the world overlooked.

Yet it was there, just beneath the surface.

“Have you read the Silmarillion?” you ventured.

“I tried,” He grimaced. “Felt like reading a textbook. Not sure I even made it halfway.”

“That’s fair,” you admitted with a laugh. “It’s not the easiest read. But it’s worth it, I promise.”

Bucky didn’t look convinced, but he didn’t shut the idea down, either.  

You made a snap decision. Reaching behind the counter, you pulled out your personal copy of The Silmarillion. It wasn’t a rare edition, but it was filled with your notes in the margins, a map you’d sketched for reference, and little Post-its marking key passages. “Take this,” you offered, holding it out to him.

He hesitated, not used to kindness from beautiful strangers. “You sure?”

“Absolutely. Hopefully the notes will make it easier. And don’t even worry about returning it,” you nodded, “It’s probably for the best. I obsess over it too much.”

He took the book, his metal fingers brushing against yours as he did, making your stomach flutter. “Thanks.”

“And if you’re curious about all those papers written about you...” You looked through bookmarks on your laptop, typing ‘James Barnes’ into the search bar. You jotted down a list of academic articles you’d read— some about his time in WWII, others about his unique role as a postwar icon. “Here. If you want to see what people are saying.”

He smiled that kind smile again, folding the paper carefully and tucked it into his jacket. “I appreciate it.”

When he left with the first edition of The Hobbit, your annotated Silmarillion, and your list of articles about him, you found yourself staring at the door long after it had closed, hoping it wasn’t the last time he’d visit your shop. 

—

Bucky started coming in more frequently, always buying another rare book— Hemingway, Orwell, Lovecraft. The pretense was paper-thin, though, and you both knew it. 

Sure, he enjoyed books, but by that point he knew he could’ve gotten cheaper copies on a bid online (rent in a big city was expensive)— and the books he bought weren't even that rare. 

Each visit turned into a lengthy discussion that carried you through the night, far past the shop’s usual closing time.  

One afternoon, he returned something unexpected: your well-worn copy of The Silmarillion. Admittedly, you’d  missed it—  its once-pristine pages now brimming with additional notations—his handwriting mixing with yours.  

“I had to,” he said, an almost sheepish smile tugging at his lips. “Your notes made me see it differently. It felt like a conversation.” 

You opened it, thumbing through the pages, your eyes catching his commentary. He had sharp, incisive thoughts: challenging some of your interpretations, expanding on others, and sometimes adding playful jabs in the margins when he disagreed with your analysis.

“This is dangerous,” you said, glancing up at him with a teasing smile. “Do you really want a debate about Tolkienian theology?”  

“I’ve got time, doll,” he said with a grin, settling onto the stool by the counter. Your cheeks flushed at the nickname, hearts doing backflips in your ribcage.

And so, that evening, you indulged in the mind of James Buchanan Barnes, exploring his thoughts and musings about Middle-earth. For the next two hours, the two of you argued about the nature of Ilúvatar’s creation, the Fëanor tragic story, and whether or not Morgoth represented a failure of divine providence.  

“I’ll admit,” he said at one point, leaning back and crossing his arms, “I wasn’t expecting it to feel so... biblical.”  

“It’s a way to think about creation through the lens of fantasy,” you replied, your voice softening as you traced your fingers over the book’s cover. “There’s a reason people get lost in it.”  

He watched you for a moment, his gaze lingering, his smile fading into something softer. 

It wasn’t the only time your conversations would take a turn like this. A week later, gothic monsters were your battlefield.

Bucky leaned against the counter, an old edition of Dracula he had just purchased in his hands, the worn leather squeaking as he shifted. His brow furrowed in that way that always made you wonder what he was thinking— though you had a feeling he was about to pick a fight, again.

“You’re out of your mind if you think Frankenstein beats Dracula,” he said, glancing up, his blue eyes gleaming with mischief.

“I’m not saying they’re even comparable,” you countered, crossing your arms as you leaned against the opposite side of the counter. “They’re completely different genres. It’s not a fair fight. But if it were... Frankenstein wins. Hands down.”

Bucky chuckled, a low, warm sound that made it impossible not to smile. “You think that because you’re obsessed with sci-fi. If it’s got a fake scientist and a lot of regret, you’re sold.”

“And you think Dracula is better because it’s all dark and broody,” you shot back, arching an eyebrow, “sound familiar?” You smirked, mirroring his stance against the opposite side of the counter. “Besides, Frankenstein is a masterpiece—philosophy, morality, hubris—it’s got layers. What’s Dracula got? Melodrama?”

“Hey! Dracula has layers!” Bucky chuckled low in his throat, setting the book down. “It’s about primal fear, wrapped in ancient powers, wrapped again in the clash between tradition and modernity.”

“It is enjoyable, I must admit, but it’s just a glorified soap opera.” You groaned, though your lips twitched in spite of yourself. “Shelley’s work makes you think, you know? It’s art.”

“Art?!” he repeated, stepping closer, his voice dropping just enough to make your pulse skip. “It’s a guy making bad decisions and spending the rest of the book dodging the consequences.”

You straightened, eyes narrowing. “It’s about responsibility! The monster is a reflection of Victor’s failure. He’s abandoned and searching for connection—”

“And whining about it,” Bucky interrupted with a smirk, folding his arms. “Dracula doesn’t whine.”

The playful sparring faded when it hit you.

Frankenstein’s monster was created without consent, shaped into something he never chose to be. He was cast out, left to navigate a world that saw him as a mistake. The monster was isolated— burdened by guilt—the question of whether he was defined by the harm he’d done.

“Does he…” you started, gulping, unsure of how he’d react to an outright observation. “Does Frankenstein’s monster make you uncomfortable?”

As you stepped closer, his expression faltered, his eyes dropping to the book in his hands. Slowly, he set it aside, the movement deliberate. You reached out, your fingers brushing against the cold surface of his metal arm before resting there gently. “Does it hit too close to home?” you asked.

He didn’t deny it. A quiet laugh escaped him instead. He shook his head. “You’re too damn perceptive for your own good,” he murmured, his voice tinged with a longing for something you couldn’t quite place.  

Your fingers moved in slow circles against his metal hand, and when it twitched beneath your touch, you knew he felt it—knew he felt you.  

“The monster was never the villain,” you said, a fragile offering meant to soothe him. “He just needed someone to see him. He can be kind, too.”  

His gaze lifted, locking onto yours, and the raw vulnerability in his eyes stole the air from your lungs. For a heartbeat, the world stilled. 

Then Bucky’s smirk returned, smaller this time, as he leaned into your touch as if he craved it. “Nice try,” he said, voice lighter but still soft. “You’re not winning this one. Dracula’s better.”

You laughed, the tension breaking just enough to let you breathe again. “You’re impossible, Barnes.”

—

You were afraid you had scared him off after that, but to your surprise, he returned a week later, albeit a bit bruised from a mission.  

You’d been reshelving old graphic novels that day (First Edition Hergé that you were quite excited by), the quiet hum of the shop wrapping you in comfortable silence, when you caught sight of him out of the corner of your eye. His dark leather jacket hung slightly open, revealing a plain gray shirt that stretched just enough across his chest to draw your eyes. There was a faint cut near his jaw, still healing.  

“Hey,” he said, his voice soft as he approached. His eyes lingered on you for a beat longer than necessary. “You look beautiful today. Is that a new dress?”

Your breath caught, and a warmth crept up your neck as you glanced down at the simple, flowy dress you’d chosen that morning. “It is,” you admitted, looking back up at him with a shy smile. “Thanks for noticing.”

“Hard not to,” he murmured, his lips curving into a small, almost teasing smile before he turned toward the shelves.

You busied yourself with reshelving more books behind the counter, but you couldn’t help watching him out of the corner of your eye. His human hand traced idly along the spines, careful not to inflict damage. When he stopped, he plucked a rare-ish pocket 6th edition of Thus Spake Zarathustra from the shelf, his metal fingers glinting faintly in the light of the shop.

“You actually like this guy?” he asked quietly, lifting the book like he was sharing a secret.  

“Like is a strong word,” you said, stepping out from behind the ladder. His gaze caught yours, and there was a flicker of something playful in those blue eyes. Your pulse quickened, beckoning him to the counter. “He was no saint, but hardly anyone is. I… appreciate his contribution. It’s not his fault people misuse his work.” 

Bucky had witnessed it firsthand: fascists distorting Nietzsche's philosophy, disregarding its complexities, and twisting his ideas into a justification for genocide.

His lips turned upward, a lopsided grin that softened the sharpness of his jaw. His stance shifted, leaning against the counter with a practiced ease. His eyes flickered, taking you in, and when you crossed your arms, his gaze lingered briefly, enough to spark a bubbling heat beneath your skin.  

“You don’t think Nietzsche was a proto-fascist, do you?” you asked, tilting your head.  

“God, no,” he said quickly, amusement softening his voice. His grin spread, revealing the faintest cute dimple in his cheek. “I’ve read enough to know better. But I don’t exactly buy the Übermensch thing either. It’s too... self-centered for my taste. The whole idea of being ‘beyond good and evil’ feels dangerous.”  

“That’s fair,” you said, closing the distance between you as you reached for the book in his hand. Your fingers brushed his as you slipped it from his grasp, his touch warm, steady, almost deliberate. His eyes flickered down to where your hands had met. “There are many flaws in his thinking, but I don’t think the concept is inherently bad,” you continued, the air between you charged with tension. You tilted the book toward him, as though showing him something, though you both knew you weren’t really focused on the pages. “It’s about striving for a better version of yourself. I think he wanted people to create their own meaning, not follow blindly.”  

“Maybe,” Bucky murmured, his voice dropping an octave. He shifted closer, his fingers tapping lightly against the counter, the sound echoing in the quiet room. His metal hand rested at his side, the vibranium gleaming faintly as his other hand inched forward, almost brushing yours.  

His breath fanned your cheek as he leaned in, close enough now that you could see the stubble along his jaw, the way his lashes framed those blue eyes. “But there’s something so… wrong about thinking you’re the one who gets to decide what’s right,” he whispered, his voice like a secret meant only for you.  

He was close, dangerously so— that you could feel his breath on your nose.

The bell above the door chimed suddenly, breaking the moment like shattered glass. Dr. Hart, a lecturer from the local university, stepped inside, a bundle of papers tucked under her arm, and smiled in greeting.  

She was a returning customer, here to pick up a special edition of Conversation on Botany that you had tracked down for her.

“That’s $40, Mr. Barnes,” You took a small, steadying breath and waved at Hart with a thumbs up that said I’ve got your book.

His lips twitched into a knowing smile. Hr reached for his wallet, pulling out a few bills. As he handed them to you, his fingers brushed yours again.

“I’ll see you soon,” he promised, his voice soft, almost teasing.

—

The tipping point came late one evening.  

You’d spent the last few hours catalouging a shipment of rare books, the shop’s air thick with the comforting scent of old leather, yellowing paper, and the faint hint of dust that always seemed to cling to ancient texts. The shop was silent save for the scratch of your pen against paper as you logged the latest arrival.  

The peace shattered with the familiar jingle of the bell above the door.  

“Shop’s closed,” you said without looking up, your voice automatic, your focus still on the fragile spine of a sixteenth-century text.  

“Good thing I’m not here to shop,” came the deep, unmistakable voice of Bucky Barnes.  

Your hand froze, an involuntary smile tugging at your lips. You looked up, finding him leaning against the doorframe with that trademark blend of casual confidence and smoldering intensity. His black Henley stretched across his chest, the sleeves pushed up to reveal his forearms—a sight you tried not to dwell on for too long.  

“What are you here for, then?” you asked, arching an eyebrow as you tried to sound indifferent.  

“Conversation,” he said simply, stepping further inside.  

You huffed a quiet laugh, shaking your head as you returned to your work. “You came all the way here just to talk?”  

“Don’t flatter yourself,” he teased, his lips turning into a sly smile as he perched on the edge of your desk. “I was in the neighborhood.”  

You rolled your eyes but didn’t bother responding. Bucky always had a way of pulling your attention, and tonight was no different. You tried to focus on the delicate bindings in front of you, but his overwhelming presence was impossible to ignore.  

When he reached for a book from the nearby stack—a copy of Meditations by Marcus Aurelius—you finally gave in.  

“Stoicism?” you asked, your tone light with playful mockery. 

He flipped the book open, his fingers grazing the thin pages. “You’re really surprised? I thought you’d figure that about me,” he said, glancing up at you with a hint of a challenge in his eyes. “Marcus Aurelius had a lot to say about self-control.”  

“And yet here you are…” you replied, gesturing to where he was leaning across your workspace, a soft furrow of amusement on your eyebrows. You decided you could be flirty— eyeing the undone button of his Henley, showing a hint of his skin underneath. “...testing mine.”  

The corners of his mouth curved. “Guess I’m doing my part to help you practice.”  

You shook your head, half-smiling. “It’s not just about self-control, now is it? It’s about accepting what you can’t change.”  

He tilted his head, agreeing with you. “Or a way to stop drowning in things you can’t fix.”  

From there, the conversation unfurled like a thread you couldn’t stop pulling. Philosophy, morality, the nature of good and evil—it didn’t take long before you were fully engrossed, debating with a ferocity that surprised even you. Bucky was sharp, quick-witted, and maddeningly good at challenging your points. Every time you thought you had the upper hand, he’d counter with something so precise, so well-argued, that you couldn’t help but admire his mind.  

As the debate shifted, you sat on your desk, its surface cluttered with books that were hard to find, but not rare enough to be put in a glass case. Your focus was solely on Bucky, who was pacing the room with measured steps, his hands brushing against the edges of shelves every so often as though grounding himself.

“Alright,” you said, leaning forward, crossing your legs. “Here’s a question for you: Should Batman kill the Joker?” 

Slowly, he turned and walked closer to you, his shoes thudding softly against the floor. He stopped just short of your legs, leaning forward slightly, his gaze locking onto yours, making your pulse quicken.

Oh, that piqued his interest.

“I should’ve known you’d bring up Batman.” Bucky’s lips curved into a smirk, eyeing up the first print of 90s DC comics in the corner of the room that hadn’t been there two days ago— a fresh delivery, perhaps? You were always very topical, and the recent restocks somehow always made their way into conversation.

“It’s a valid moral dilemma,” you said, straightening, your chin lifting slightly. 

He tilted his head, his expression a blend of amusement and challenge. “Why don’t you tell me?”  

“Of course he should,” You didn’t hesitate, the answer rolling off your tongue with absolute conviction. “The Joker is a mass murderer. Every time Batman spares him, more people die. His refusal to act is just as bad as pulling the trigger himself.”  

Bucky’s smile lingered, but his gaze grew darker, ever so slightly. “So you’re saying Batman’s refusal to kill makes him complicit?”  

“Yes,” you said firmly, leaning in slightly, the heat of the argument pulling you closer. “Batman’s morality is Kantian—rigid rules and all. But if he were more… utilitarian, he’d save more lives. The greatest good for the greatest number. One life to save countless others.”  

“That kind of math doesn’t scare you?” Bucky asked, leaning back as though to put some distance between you, though his eyes stayed locked on yours. “Once you start deciding whose lives matter more, where do you stop?”  

“It’s not about worth,” you argued, the intensity rippling from him unnerving but impossible to look away from. “It’s about outcomes. If you can prevent suffering, don’t you have a responsibility to do it?”  

The silence that followed felt heavier than it should’ve. His jaw clicked a bit, tightening as he considered your words. When he finally spoke, his voice was quieter, shyer.

“If that’s your stance, then maybe someone should’ve killed the Winter Soldier years ago.”  

His words hit you like a punch in the gut, your breath catching. The implication of his statement filled the room, coiling tight around your chest.  

“Bucky,” you said quickly, panic creeping into your voice, your fingers twitching toward him but freezing halfway. “That’s not—”  

The corner of his mouth curved into a small, fragile smile. “Relax,” he said, holding up a hand, his voice dipping into something gentler. “I’m not offended. This is just a debate, right?”  

“It’s not the same,” you insisted, your voice gentler, almost pleading. You stood from your desk, hesitation in your chest as you reached out— you were scared he might pull away, “you were brainwashed.” Slowly, you pressed your hand to his cheek, his stubble rough beneath your palm. It was a wordless apology—a pathetic attempt to comfort, to reach him where words had failed. 

To your surprise, he didn’t stop you. Instead, he leaned into your touch. 

Bucky, slid his arm around your waist, testing the waters. His eyes flicked to yours, searching for any sign of rejection, any hint that he’d crossed a line. But there were none. Instead, the subtle hitch in your breath and the way you leaned into him told him everything he needed to know.

He shook his head, rubbing soft circles on your hip as if to say you’re okay. This conversation is more than okay. “But in the grand scheme of utilitarianism, it shouldn’t matter, right? My life was a liability. More people would’ve been saved if I hadn’t been around to hurt them.”  

His words settled over you like a storm cloud. The silence stretched, your carefully crafted argument unraveling in the face of his lived experience.  

He leaned forward then, bridging the space between you, his arm pinning you in place. “Maybe I understand Batman better than most,” he said, his voice quiet but intense. “Killing someone doesn’t always fix what’s broken. It just leaves you with blood on your hands.”  

Your throat tightened, the words sticking. He was too close now, the tension between you buzzing like a static current.  

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, but he heard it.  

“Don’t be.” His words were soft as he pulled you closer. There was always a hint of warmth in his eyes, an unspoken kindness you admired.

The room felt smaller now, more heated. You opened your mouth to respond, but his words had stolen all the air from your lungs.  

He leaned in, his voice dropping. “It’s easy to talk about morality in the abstract. But when you’re staring someone in the face—when it’s a real person, and not just an idea—it gets a lot harder to play God.”  

Shit.

He was right.  

Maybe utilitarianism wasn’t a steadfast rule. Maybe it couldn’t be, not when you factored in the messy, unpredictable depths of human existence. Lives weren’t just numbers to balance on a scale—they were stories, choices, pain, hope. And Bucky… Bucky was proof of that.  

Your thoughts churned as you looked at him.

You felt your conviction unravel. It wasn’t just that his argument was sound—though it was (infuriatingly so)—it was the way he’d delivered it, the personal truth lending it undeniable power. And that’s when it hit you. That’s why you found him so damn attractive.  

Sure, he was gorgeous. The sharp lines of his jawline, the piercing blue of his eyes, the way his Henley stretched over his shoulders like it had been designed with him in mind. But that wasn’t it. Not entirely.  

It was him. His humanity. His thoughtfulness. The kindness that softened the edges, the depth that came from wrestling with his own darkness and coming out better on the other side.  

And he was brilliant. For the first time, you felt like you’d met your match. Someone who met you on your turf and stood his ground, someone who didn’t just nod along or agree to avoid conflict. Someone who could challenge you, who could look you in the eye and make you see the world differently.  

You thought you’d built your worldview on unshakable foundations, but he’d cracked it wide open, and now all you could do was stare at him with the dawning realisation that this wasn’t just attraction. It was something deeper, something that terrified and thrilled you in equal measure.  

He wasn’t just a match for you physically; he was your intellectual equal—a rare kind of connection that made your pulse race and left your thoughts spinning.

Before you could stop yourself, before you could think it through, you leaned forward and kissed him.  

It was impulsive—a collision of lips born from the fiery tension that had simmered between you for weeks. It was everything unsaid, every glance, every near touch that had lingered just a fraction too long, all boiling over in one moment. He froze for the briefest heartbeat, but then something in him snapped. His hands found you, pulling you closer, his grip possessive, almost desperate. Your hands made their way through the soft strands of his hair, landing comfortably around his neck.

The kiss, slow at first, quickly became frantic. Neither of you could get enough. The only thing that mattered was him—his lips on yours, his touch, the way his body pressed against you like a promise. 

When you finally broke apart, gasping for air, his forehead rested against yours, his lips curled into a breathless smile. For a second, he could forget about everything that has happened to him. For a second, he was truly, utterly safe in your arms.

“I didn’t think you were the type to kiss someone in the middle of a moral argument about Batman,” he murmured, his voice low and teasing, his lips grazing yours with every word, sending shivers down your spine.

“And I didn’t think you’d let me,” you replied, your voice laced with a mischievous edge.

His eyes darkened, his smile widening just enough to make your heart race before he closed the distance again, capturing your lips in another searing kiss. This time, it wasn’t careful or calculated—it was raw, fervent, consuming. Your back hit the desk behind you, his hands sliding around your waist and around the curve of your bum, firm and deliberate, setting every nerve in your body on fire. 

“The books,” he mumbled against your lips, glancing at the teetering stack beside you, the volumes threatening to topple.

“I don’t care,” you said breathlessly, and to prove your point, you swiped the entire stack to the floor with a crash. The sound echoed, but you barely heard it over the roaring thump of your heartbeat in your ears. 

They weren’t too rare. You’ll just put them on the discount aisle tomorrow. 

His response was a low, guttural groan, his lips finding yours again, His fingers tangled in your hair, tugging just enough to make your head tilt back, exposing the sensitive curve of your neck. He didn’t waste the opportunity, his lips and teeth trailing along your skin, finding the spot just below your ear that made you gasp. 

“Did I manage to change your mind this time?” he murmured against your ear, his voice rough and unsteady as his lips brushed against your jaw, then lower, tracing a heated path along your collarbone. 

You managed a breathless laugh, your fingers slipping under his shirt to trace the veins under his skin, his muscles tensing under your touch. “Okay, so maybe ‘the greatest good for the greatest number’ isn’t always the best approach when you’re the one holding the short end of the categorical imperative,” you whispered, your voice trembling with desire.

His laugh was husky, his hands lower to grip your thighs, pushing himself flush against you. “God, you’re something else,” he said, his lips finding yours again, this time slower, deeper, as though savoring you. When he finally pulled back, his voice was hoarse. “Do you want to go on a date?”

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden shift. “You’re seriously asking me that now?” you asked, breathless. With your hands trailing over the planes of his chest, his breath mingling with yours, it seemed a bit out of order, but you weren’t about to complain.

“Yes,” he said, his words dead serious despite the way his hands clutched at your shirt, his lips finding the hollow of your throat. He kissed the spot slowly, firmly, making your legs feel numb. “I mean it,” he added, his voice softer, yet no less insistent.

You let out a breathless laugh, tugging him into another kiss, the kind that left no room for doubt about your answer. “Then yes,” you murmured, your voice low and teasing as you pulled back just enough to meet his eyes. “We’re going to have a lot to talk about.”

And boy, were you excited to talk to this man— a man who could turn the simplest circumstances into a philosophical debate, someone who wasn’t afraid to dispute your ideals. 

Someone who was your match.

“Later,” he rasped, his voice gravelly with need, his hands trailing up to tug his henley over his head in one fluid motion. The sight of him stole the breath from your lungs, but you didn’t have time to appreciate it before he was kissing you again, his bare skin pressed against you as he lifted your shirt off. “We can talk later.”

-end.

[a1ecmcdowell]

all the times mechanic!dean was humbled by bimbo!reader - 18+

★ ˚⋆

dean was convinced, a lot of the time, that not a single coherent thought existed in the white noise of your brain, just accepting that you were one of those girls with a pretty face to her legacy. it wasn't a bad thing. he'd never admit it, but seeing your face light up when he explained something to you was one of his favorite looks on you - the glimmering wide eyes, the o-shaped part of your glossy lips as the pieces clicked into place.

other times, he was floored by the capacity of that pretty little head and the information it held. completely floored. you never said anything with malice either, or chastised him for not thinking in the same way that you did. just stated the things like fact, typing away on your pretty pink iphone with your pretty pink manicured nails, not even looking up to see that you'd taken his breath away.

there were a lot more of these instances than he cared to admit. he was a proud, prideful kind of guy, often convinced that it was his way or the highway.

until you came around.

he'd started a list on his phone, of some of those times, cementing them into a vault of your history. maybe he'd show it to you on your wedding or something cheesy like that, that he knew you would love. or maybe he'd keep it to himself, as to not humble himself further.

when you'd called a car's failing engine a "tummy ache", and that was how he figured out that the cause was the owner putting in the wrong gas.

the first time you talked him into trying on your panties, and he'd tried to deny it heavily, and you'd said, "it's just clothes." and it was so simple but he'd never thought of it like that. like holy shit, yeah, it's just clothes.

when you'd tried to hook up with him at his work, in the backseat of his car no less, and dean desperately tried to keep some semblance of professionalism at his job, and you were like "who's gonna see? no one comes here." and he proceeded to fuck you into the leather with, you guessed it; not a single customer to see the fogged windows and the rattling frame.

you got him to start saying things are cunty and that's not even the humbling part. the fact that he could not fucking stop himself from calling everything cunty when you were around was.

when you'd called the stars "little suns" and now every time he looks at the night sky, he can't help but think if you're looking at the little suns too.

he'd been staying late trying to finish a car and you'd gotten upset and told him "who's gonna need their car this late?" and yeah. who the hell was? he made it home in five minutes and made up for his time away.

he told you that one day he'd take you to meet his family and you called them the witch burners with the straightest face he'd ever seen. yeah. they did do that sometimes. but don't say that to their face.

sometimes his old habits would kick in and he'd start doing everything for you, like he did growing up with sammy, and you remind him every time that you were his baby but not his baby.

he joked that you were baby vers. 2, and you'd said, "you can't call everything you park yourself in baby." he started calling you princess immediately after.

he'd grabbed your hair once when you were bent over during sex and you whirled around so fast he honestly thought you were going to kill him. like there was more fear in his eyes then than there was in some of the hunts he did before he retired.

when you insisted in front of his coworkers that, no, you did not want to drive your car if he was there to tote you around already. like, fuck him, honestly, for not assuming you would want to be chauffeured. he was still living that shit down.

"no, dean, i'm not blowing you right now, this is a chanel lip gloss." right. because he was supposed to know what that meant. "i am not wiping chanel off with a paper towel, dean." tell chanel to get off her fucking high horse, thanks!

he tried to be romantic once and put his hand on your thigh while driving and you glanced down with a pout and said, "your filthy oil hands :(" with that exact sad face. he didn't know how else to convey the utter devastation in his typed list without the fucking emoticon. you'd have thought he ran over your baby or something.

notes, guys ... i fear they are rent free rn. something ab grumpy/sunshine in any form is going to do it for me every time.

tags ( if some of these dont work im gonna run up and down the street butt naked on god ) @titsout4nicholas @deans-yn @dipperscavern @devoursweetly @jasvtsc @panickedbitch @t3l3vangelism @jensenacklesfan69 @manicjk @mkendlic @hischrrypie @deanswidow @figthoughts

[leona-hawthorne]

I keep imagining it being the night before the Yule Ball, and bc Matty never wears his tie for the uniform anyway, you have to help him out and do it for him bc he wants to look perfect for you and is struggling. Just me? Okay 😅

oh my god yes this is so cute!!!

it’s the night of the yule ball and the common room is practically deserted, everyone already in the ballroom. you’re perched on the arm of one of the big leather chairs, waiting for mattheo to finish getting ready because of course he’s waited until the last possible second to figure out his suit. his black dress shirt is unbuttoned at the collar, sleeves rolled up, and he’s muttering curses at his tie because it’s refusing to cooperate.

“this stupid thing,” he growls, yanking at the silk like it personally offended him. his brows are furrowed, his bottom lip caught between his teeth in concentration, and honestly? it's kind of adorable seeing him this flustered. you can tell he’s about three seconds away from throwing the tie into the fire.

"need some help?" you offer, trying to keep the amusement out of your voice (and failing spectacularly).

he looks up, a little startled, like he forgot you were there, and then that familiar cocky smirk makes an appearance. "help? me? nah, i've got it handled," he says, even as he fumbles with the fabric again, somehow managing to make it look worse.

"sure you do. come here."

"i don't—”

"mattheo."

he sighs, dropping his hands and tilting his head back dramatically like he's being sentenced to death.

you can’t help but laugh a little as you slide off the chair and cross the room to him. “here,” you say, taking the ends of the tie out of his hands before he can actually commit arson.

he’s suddenly so quiet, like he doesn’t trust his voice not to give him away, because holy shit you’re so close. close enough that he can see the little flecks of color in your eyes and catch the faintest whiff of your perfume.

“would’ve done this ages ago if i’d known you didn’t know how to tie your own tie,” you tease, looping the fabric around your fingers to start fixing the knot.

he huffs, but it’s not annoyed—it’s shy. “didn’t wanna bother you.”

and you just give him this look, one brow raised, because bother you? the boy who literally leaned his entire weight on you during potions last week and whispered nonsense in your ear for thirty minutes straight thought this was bothering you?

“you could’ve just asked for help.”

"yeah, but where's the fun in that?" he quips, but his voice is quieter now, his gaze fixed on your face.

and then, because it's mattheo, he can't help himself. "you're enjoying this, aren't you? playing dress-up with me?"

you smirk, tightening the knot just enough to make him swallow hard.

"maybe a little. you clean up nice, riddle."

"you think so?"

you step back, admiring your work, and something about the way he's looking at you—like you're the only thing in the world that matters—makes your chest tighten. "i know so."

"i just... i just want to look good for you."

and just like that, any teasing remark you were about to make dies in your throat. because mattheo riddle—the arrogant, insufferable, too-cool-for-everything mattheo riddle—is standing here, nervous and vulnerable and entirely too sweet, all because he wants to impress you.

"you will," you say softly, your fingers curling around his. "you already do."

and the smile he gives you? yeah, that's the kind of thing that could make you fall in love all over again.

navigation mattheo riddle masterlist

[n0vazsq]

Pretty Boy | LN4 x Reader

pairing . . . lando norris x gf!artist!reader

summary . . . While you're sketching a drawing of Lando, you notice that something's off with him. Then, you remind him that he's much more than what people think of him

request . . . no!

word count . . . 759

warnings . . . none! just one use of 'damn'

faceclaim . . . N/A

alexavia yaps . . . first lando fic!!! a bit short but i hope you guys like it <33

. . . The room smelled like salted caramel and the leather of the couch you were currently sitting on. Lando sat across from you, sat on the arm of the chair, one leg bouncing restlessly. The glow from his phone lit up his face every few seconds, softening the sharpness of his jawline, but it didn’t hold his attention for long. He set it down after scrolling aimlessly, leaning back with a sigh.

"You know," you started, stretching out your legs, "you really need to learn how to sit still. You’re stressing me out."

He flashed you that damn grin, the one he knew you hated for how effortlessly it made you forgive him for everything. "You sound like my engineer," he laughed, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

"Maybe I should be," you shot back, holding up the sketchpad in your lap. "You’re not exactly making this easy for me."

His eyes flicked to the page, and he tilted his head, squinting slightly. "That’s me?"

"Who else do you think I’ve been sketching this whole time? Your mum?"

Lando grinned, leaning in closer to get a better look. His hair was slightly messy, still damp from the shower he’d taken earlier, and you could smell the faint trace of his shampoo as he hovered over your shoulder. "Not bad," he said with mock seriousness, tapping his chin. "You almost got my nose right."

You turned your head, glaring playfully. "Almost? You’re lucky I even attempted that ski slope you call a nose."

He pretended to be offended, leaning back dramatically, a hand on his chest. "Ski slope? That’s rich coming from someone who-" He cut himself off, laughing at your raised eyebrow.

"Go on," you urged, smirking now.

"Nah," he said, still laughing as he settled back into the chair. "You’re not worth the fight."

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. Lando had this way of lighting up a room without even trying, of making you feel like the only person who mattered when he turned that adorable charm your way. It was infuriating, really.

But tonight, something about him seemed quieter. The usual spark in his eyes was dimmer, and the edges of his grin didn’t reach as far.

"What’s going on with you?" you asked, setting the sketchpad aside.

He shrugged, looking down at his hands, which were fidgeting with the hem of his hoodie. "Nothing. Just thinking."

"About....?"

He hesitated, chewing on the inside of his cheek before finally meeting your gaze. "You ever feel like… I don’t know. Like people only see what they want to see when they look at you?"

You blinked, caught off guard by the question. "Where’s this coming from?"

He shrugged again, more defensively this time. "It’s just… I don’t know. Everyone’s always saying stuff, you know? About me. Pretty boy this, golden boy that. Like that’s all I am."

You leaned forward, resting your elbows on your knees. "You know that’s not true, right?"

"Isn’t it?" he countered, his voice softer now, more uncertain.

"My beloved Lando." You said his name like it was the answer to a question he didn’t want to ask. "You’re so much more than what people say. You’re brilliant, and kind, and funny, annoyingly so, actuall. You care about the people around you more than you probably should."

He didn’t say anything, just stared at you with this look that made your chest tighten.

"I don’t see some ‘pretty boy,’" you continued. "I see you. The real you. And if other people don’t, that’s their loss. But just saying, you are pretty."

The corner of his mouth twitched, and he looked away, rubbing the back of his neck. "You’re too good at this whole therapy talk thing, you know that?"

You smirked, leaning back against the couch again. "Yeah, well, someone’s gotta keep your ego contained."

He laughed then, the sound breaking through the tension like sunlight through a cloud. And when he looked back at you, the spark in his eyes was there again, faint but unmistakable.

"Thanks," he said simply.

"For what?"

"For being here. For being… ," He took a deep breath, arms raising and falling, like he was trying to cut the air. "You.”

Your smile softened, and you shrugged. "Someone’s gotta put up with you."

He laughed again, shaking his head. "Lucky me, huh?"

And in the glow of the room, with the soft hum of the music in the background, you thought maybe you were the lucky one.

[starkeyslibrary]

Exile

Inspired by the song Exile by Taylor Swift

pairing: you x drew starkey

The café was quiet, save for the hum of soft jazz filtering through the speakers and the clinking of cups against saucers. You sat in a booth by the window, fingers wrapped around a mug of now-lukewarm coffee. The cloudy skies outside mirrored the storm brewing inside you. Drew was late—again.

You sighed, glancing at the empty chair across from you. The weight in your chest grew heavier with every tick of the clock. This wasn’t the first time he’d kept you waiting, but it felt different today. He’d been distant for weeks, his texts growing shorter, his excuses more frequent. It was as though he was drifting away, and you were powerless to stop it.

The door chimed, and there he was. Drew Starkey, with his messy hair, sharp jawline, and the same leather jacket he wore on your first date. He looked like a dream. He always did. But the tired look in his eyes and the hesitation in his step turned your stomach. He spotted you, offering a small, tentative smile as he walked over.

“Hey,” he said, sliding into the seat across from you.

“Hey,” you replied, your voice quieter than you intended. You watched as he fidgeted with the hem of his jacket, avoiding your gaze. The silence stretched between you, heavy and uncomfortable. Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. “Drew, what’s going on?”

His head snapped up, and for a second, he looked startled. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” Your voice was steady, but your hands trembled slightly as you set your mug down. “You’ve been... distant. Different. And I feel like I don’t know where I stand with you anymore.”

He sighed, leaning back in his seat. His hands rubbed his face, and you could see the exhaustion etched into every line of his expression. “I’ve been busy,” he said finally, his voice devoid of its usual warmth. “Work’s been insane, and... I don’t know. It’s not you.”

“It’s not me,” you repeated, bitterness creeping into your tone. “That’s all you’ve got?”

“What do you want me to say?” he snapped, his voice rising slightly. “That I’ve been overwhelmed? That I don’t know how to balance everything right now? Because I don’t.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me that?” you asked, your voice cracking. “Why did you just... shut me out instead?”

Drew looked away, his jaw clenching. “Because it’s easier that way.”

“Easier for who?” you demanded. “Because it sure as hell hasn’t been easy for me, Drew. I’ve been sitting here, trying to figure out what I did wrong. What I could’ve done differently. And you didn’t even give me the chance to fix it.”

“There’s nothing to fix!” he said, his frustration spilling over. “Don’t you get it? Sometimes, things just... fall apart.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. You stared at him, your eyes stinging with unshed tears. “So that’s it?” you whispered. “You’re just giving up?”

“I’m not giving up,” he said, but his voice lacked conviction. “I’m being realistic.”

“Realistic,” you repeated, your voice trembling. “No, Drew. What you’re being is a coward.”

His eyes snapped to yours, anger flashing across his face. “A coward? Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously,” you said, leaning forward. “You’re running away because it’s easier than staying and fighting for what we have. And you know what? Maybe that’s on me for believing in us more than you did.”

“That’s not fair,” he said, his voice low. “You think this is easy for me? You think I don’t care?”

“I don’t know, Drew,” you said, throwing your hands up. “Because you won’t tell me anything! You won’t let me in!”

He fell silent, his fists clenching on the table. The air between you was charged, the weight of all the unsaid words pressing down on both of you. Finally, he looked at you, his blue eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite name—regret, maybe. Or guilt.

“I tried,” he said quietly. “I really did. But we’re just... we’re not on the same page anymore.”

You felt the tears spill over now, hot and unrelenting. “So, what?” you said, your voice breaking. “You’re just going to walk away? After everything?”

“I don’t know what else to do,” he admitted, his voice thick. “I don’t know how to fix this.”

“You don’t even want to try,” you said, shaking your head. “You’ve already made up your mind.”

He didn’t deny it. And that hurt more than anything he could’ve said.

The drive home was a blur, the world outside your window smeared with rain and tears. By the time you reached your apartment, the ache in your chest had settled into something deeper, heavier. You kicked off your shoes and sank onto the couch, burying your face in your hands.

Your phone buzzed on the coffee table. For a moment, you considered ignoring it. But when you saw Drew’s name on the screen, your heart clenched. You hesitated before opening the message.

“I’m sorry for tonight. I never wanted to hurt you.”

You stared at the words, the hollow apology doing little to ease the pain. You wanted to reply, to tell him how much he’d broken you, but what was the point? He’d already decided it was over.

Instead, you turned off your phone and curled up on the couch, letting the darkness swallow you whole.

The next week was a blur of numbness and routine. You went to work, smiled when you had to, and avoided any place where you might run into Drew. The ghost of him lingered everywhere—in the smell of coffee, in the playlists you couldn’t bring yourself to delete, in the way your chest tightened every time you passed his favorite bar.

One night, you found yourself sitting on your bed, staring at an old photo of the two of you. It was from last summer, at a carnival. Drew had his arm slung around your shoulders, his smile wide and carefree. You looked so happy, so full of hope.

That girl felt like a stranger now.

With a trembling hand, you placed the photo facedown on the nightstand. You couldn’t bring yourself to throw it away—not yet. Maybe not ever.

A month later, you saw him.

You were at a mutual friend’s party, a moment of weakness convincing you to show up despite your better judgment. And there he was, standing across the room with a beer in hand, laughing at something someone had said.

For a moment, he looked up, his eyes meeting yours. The room seemed to freeze. Neither of you moved, but the weight of that gaze was enough to shatter you all over again.

You turned and left before he could say a word.

—

The story of you and Drew didn’t end with fireworks or closure. It ended in silence, in the spaces between what was said and what was left unsaid. And as much as it hurt, you knew deep down that some stories aren’t meant to have happy endings. Some are just meant to teach you how to let go.

And so you did.

Eventually.

[astrowarr]

“We should get out of here,” Grian whispers, but he is unmoving as his gaze stays pinned to Scar. Something about Scar’s eyes, so impossibly green, keeps him rooted in the crannies of the cobbled concrete under his feet. The glow of the street light over their heads paints a sharp, clear image of Scar and the toothy grin he flashes. The bustle of the city center ever permeates the air; a loud, boisterous laugh here, an angry, affronted shout there. 

But when Scar smiles at him like that, the noise cottons into nothing but a dull thrum in the back of his skull. Scar is smiling. Despite the fact that every bone in Grian’s body should be screaming in alarm, they do not. Instead, they pulse with something warm, something content. Grian is surrounded by enemies the way he always is, but Scar is four art-adorned walls and a worn shingled roof to match. Nothing can reach Grian here, in the safety of Scar's gaze.

There's little to no space between them, and Grian does nothing to change that. Out of the corner of his eye, he tracks the gentle, methodical movement of Scar's curled hand, so slow as he reaches up. The backs of those crooked fingers brush against his face, so light Grian nearly loses it to the night's warmth.

And then, like a moonflower, his hand unfurls; he doesn't quite cradle Grian's face in it, wracked with some sudden hesitance. Scar's palm stays just a hair's breadth away: the ghost of a touch. It drives Grian crazy, how the two of them keep pushing and pulling at all the wrong moments. 

Still, Scar doesn't stop looking at him, drinking in the sight of him like he's some sort of mirage. Like the night will sweep him away if Scar dares to even blink. Grian doesn't complain— thinks, actually, that maybe the comparison is more apt than he wants it to be. Instead, he loses himself in the miles of blue skies and flower beds that explode to color in the home of their prolonged eye contact. Truthfully, he's scared to look away too.

This is it, Grian knows as his heart roars in his chest. This is it.

“Say what you mean,” Scar breathes. 

They stand in the middle of the busiest section of the city but Scar's smile is private. It is Grian's, and Grian's alone. Say what he means? What is there to say? It’s written in the brief, rare silence of Grian’s mind; the swath of stars swirling overhead, infinite in their post apocalyptic glow; the solar-powered streetlight casting its fiery light over Scar, morphing him into something divine and untouchable. There is no word in his lexicon that truly encapsulates the feeling pressing against his ribs now. It isn't safety, or contentment, or peace. It isn't even love. 

He's sick of words. They don't mean anything. They aren't enough. He locks eyes with Scar and leans in, because if Scar isn't going to touch him, he'll just have to take matters into his own hands. Grian buries his fingers in Scar's button up shirt and shuffles him backward, until his back collides with the solid metal of the lamppost. If it hurts, Scar doesn't notice; he's looking at Grian with wide eyes, dumbstruck, lips parted in wonder and maybe something else. He's never been very good at taking what he dishes.

“What I mean is,” Grian murmurs against the buzz of the streetlight as his gaze flicks down to Scar's lips. His wings shift against his will, tucking around Scar, sheltering them from prying eyes. It’s only him and Scar. “You're an idiot if you don't kiss me in the next three seconds.”

For once, Scar’s tongue of gold is heavy and unmoving; he has no quick-witted words to throw in Grian's face. All he has is awe, and some self-imposed duty that has him deferring to Grian without question; he abandons his hesitance in the shadows of this too-public street. Finally, his clammy palm cradles Grian’s cheek, tattered and pitted like the worn leather of Grian's favorite jacket. 

The kiss, though, is soft and a little uncertain, at least until Grian yanks hard at the collar of Scar's shirt. When their noses clash under the urgent force of it, Scar chokes out a shocked laugh before he's responding in kind. And Grian thinks to himself that this is the first time the two of them have ever truly eclipsed, have ever found themselves in the lines of the same page, and he thinks he wants to live here. Forever, maybe, or for as long as the universe allows.

[dakota1435]

Moonlight – Vampire!Sylus X Reader ✩₊˚.☪︎ ⁺₊✧

word count: 3k

tags: new l&ds character!, mention of alcohol, mention of violence

previous chapters found here!: x

Chapter 7

You awake softly, your eyelids heavy with exhaustion. You prop yourself up a bit, trying to come back to reality. The room turns with your vision, a dizzy spell stronger than you’ve ever felt. Quickly, you close your eyes. 

“Ugh…” You groaned quietly. 

 “How are you feeling?” Sylus voice was close to your ear, making you realize he was still next to you in bed. 

“Mhm… dizzy,” you said, noticing how dry your throat felt. Were you really this exhausted? The blood loss must’ve been too much these past two days. You feel Sylus shift around before he presses a cold glass of water against your arm. You smile at the gesture and take the glass before drinking the whole thing. 

“I…shouldn’t have taken from you so soon again,” Sylus said. It seemed like he was choosing his words carefully, slowly. “It’s hard to resist you, sweetie. You tempted me with your neck last night.” He brushed his cool fingers against your neck, tenderly. Your mind recalls every detail from last night, not to mention the ache your hips held. 

“It’s okay…” you spoke quietly. “I wanted you to,” you admitted. That much was obvious. Just recalling the overwhelming feeling of it all could turn you on again, if you weren’t so dizzy and exhausted. 

Over the next week ahead, Sylus is home more often. He doesn’t feed again, or touch you anything more than simple gestures. Although he didn’t show it, you were worried he thought he went too far during your last intimate moments together. But, maybe, he truly didn’t need to feed everyday. Or every other day. It was still difficult trying to figure him out. 

The same routine continued. You never realized how drastic it was no longer having a cellphone on you. But it gives you plenty of time to reflect and observe every detail around you. You started reading, given access to Sylus’ personal library. You asked the twins to get you a plain notebook, along with some writing pens. Since you were going to be here for the time being, it was better for your sanity to start documenting your new life. The twins might tell Sylus what you request, but that doesn’t mean he’ll find your personal journal tucked in a small, hidden space. At least, you hope so. 

…His stare is like ice, yet whenever he speaks it’s different. His words are smooth, honeyed, seductive. His touch sears into me, hot enough to make me melt. It’s hard to understand his true motives. Is this all so I can feel good? So I can forget the pain he inflicts upon his bite? Could there possibly be anything more than that? Between a human and a vampire…

You groan out loud as you hold your face in your hands. Even with writing your thoughts down, it still didn’t make any sense. What were you possibly hoping for, anyways? You close the notebook for now, tucking it back into its secret spot. A knock at your door snaps you out of your overwhelming thoughts.

“Miss? Boss wants to see you in the dining room,” said one of the twins. Luke, you assumed. He goes away without awaiting your response. You’ve learned it wasn’t unusual for Sylus to send someone to fetch you, rather than him coming himself. You sigh, combing your hands through your hair before leaving. The hallways were all familiar to you now, it didn’t feel like a maze anymore. You enter the dining room, noticing in the rare window the sun just went down. It was twilight now. Sylus stood, staring out that window. He doesn’t turn around at your arrival. 

“Come, sit.” He gestures to a large, leather chair next to him. Wordlessly, you go up to the chair and sit. You stare at Sylus, waiting for his next words. He seemed…tense. But it was hard to tell. He finally looks at you and speaks again. “The first time I brought you to an event, it ended up…unpleasant. It would be so easy if I could lock you up forever,” he chuckles darkly. You aren’t sure if he’s truly joking. “...But I need you to accompany me this time.” He looks at you, trying to gauge your response.

“Another…auction?” You asked. You were surprised he even thought about letting you outside after that incident. 

“No. This is much more important. I cannot risk leaving you here, unattended.” His tone was a bit stern. It left you puzzled.

“What? I’m…I’m not going to run, Sylus,” you stated, trying to make your point. He scoffed instead.

“I’m flattered,” he said flatly, “but that’s not what I meant. In a few days, there will be a gathering. A gathering of my kind.” He furrowed his brows a bit.

“Do you not want to go?” You asked cautiously. If he didn’t want you to pry, then that was fine, but clearly something was off. 

He sighs. “It’s significant that I arrive. I’m bringing you because I will not risk some idiot getting to you before I come back. Luke and Kieran will be away for a bit.” You muttered a small ‘oh’, understanding the picture now. To think he’s bringing his human into a den of vampires…is that truly the best idea? But then again, the thought of being alone and defenseless was bad enough. 

“Is it… truly okay I’m there with you?” You asked, feeling uncertain about your presence. Sylus pats your head once. 

“You think I would let anything happen to you? They won’t think twice about looking at you when they know you’re mine. Unfortunately for them, I don’t like sharing.” He walks over to a small desk, sorting through some papers. 

“Would I need to do anything specific?” You asked, trying to imagine what kind of event this could be. You wondered if other humans would be there, whether as a social thing or something worse. 

Sylus walks back over to you, his eyes locking onto yours. “Behave. But I’m sure that’s not a problem.” He smirked, his voice lighter. “It’s simply a formal event. I don’t expect too much. I’ll send some dresses over to you, in the meantime I have more work to catch up on.” With that, Sylus disappears to bury his head in more work. You really didn’t know how he managed it all. 

With ease, a few days pass by quickly. You didn’t hear from Sylus often, especially nothing more on the event. On the day of the event, you find a handful of boxes in your room just as he promised. You feel a tinge of excitement, eager to unbox your new dresses. You pull out a long, sleek satin dress. Its color was like a deep garnet with a lace pattern over the bust and lower waist. It was beautiful and you just had to try it on. You hurry to the bathroom and carefully slip it over yourself. This dress truly hugged your curves, but everything about it was perfect. A part of you worried it was showing off too much skin, but if Sylus didn’t think it was a problem then surely it was okay. 

“Do you like it?” Sylus’ deep voice was close to your ear. You continue to stare at the mirror, now looking at the both of you. Sylus’ eyes roamed over your body.

“Yes it’s…quite exquisite. Thank you,” you said kindly. You give him a soft smile. 

“It’s missing something though,” Sylus said, much to your surprise. Before you could ask, he places something cold around your neck. It was a victorian-style silver choker with a jewel that matched the color of your dress. Sylus clasps it together, before staring at your reflection. “There,” he said, sounding satisfied, “Now they’ll know who you belong to, kitten.” You flush a bit, but find yourself reassured. Sylus takes a step back, his eyes lingering on your back. “You seem tense, why?” Sylus’ question was straightforward. There was nothing you could hide from him. But out of the handful of things you could tell him, you picked one. 

“I’m nervous because I’m unsure what to expect,” you said truthfully. You could only think of so many outcomes of a vampire gathering. Sylus didn’t seem phased by your statement, though.

“Don’t worry, I plan to have you by my side the entire time.” Seems like that’s all you should know. You don’t inquire further, just accept whatever comes your way. You begin to prepare yourself, both mentally and physically. Adorned jewelry decorated on your body, along with the choker Sylus gave you. More like a collar in this situation, you realized. As you finish the final touches of your hair and makeup, you were ready to face it all. 

You both enter the same car you took on your last outing, sitting in the same seats. Once again, it felt absolutely refreshing to be outside again. The back courtyard could only do so much. Something about the air called to you, made you crave more. You unconsciously touch the jewel on your choker, it bringing you some form of comfort. After a long drive, the two of you finally arrive at your destination. It was a large mansion, much like Sylus’. Guests were walking in, some with partners and some without. They were all dressed fancy, exotic almost. 

“Come,” Sylus beckons. He extends his hand out to you, and you take it. He wasn’t kidding when he said he would have you by his side. You were practically glued to him. His arm around your waist was possessive, but protective. You tried to reassure yourself that you were safe in Sylus’ bubble. It was time to truly find out now. 

Upon entering the grand hallway you noticed others taking a step back from Sylus. Eyes trailing as you walk past. You weren’t stupid to not notice such a thing. Some whispered, others looked away entirely. You knew Sylus had immense power, but how much power could he possibly have? Still, you held your chin high. Your gaze never wavered. As you two enter a massive room, a couple people come to greet Sylus. 

“Sylus, sir, we’re grateful for your presence tonight. Who might—” The man addressing Sylus stops mid sentence upon looking at you. His expression is unreadable, and you weren’t sure if you were grateful for that. He suddenly snaps out of his concentration on you and bows. “My deepest apologies. Please, both of you, enjoy tonight to its fullest.” You were surprised to hear him apologize sincerely, not giving you another glance. You feel Sylus fingers touch your side a little deeper, unsure how to define it. 

“It’s quite alright. Thank you,” Sylus said, his words short. You both begin walking away from the man. You try and look up at Sylus, but he continues to stare straight ahead. You already had so many questions. A servant holding a tray of glasses pauses in front of you two, offering. Sylus grabs two glasses, each containing a deep, red liquid. You give him a puzzled look and he smirks in response. 

“What? It’s just wine,” he said, amused by your confusion. “We’re not only allowed to consume blood. We need it to survive though. If it makes you feel better, there are a handful of humans here too.” He takes a sip and licks his lips. The gesture makes you blush a bit. 

“Humans…like me?” You asked, hesitant to say the word ‘pet’. 

“Hmm…a few. But we do business with regular humans as well. You’d be surprised how involved we are in the world today,” he said. You stare back into your glass, trying to convince your brain you weren’t drinking blood. The scene laid out in front of you was beautiful, grand even. Guests were dressed up like royals, their beauty unique yet striking. Light music echoed around you, but you weren’t sure where it was coming from. Everyone chatted and laughed during the conversation, having the time of their lives. It put you at ease a little, to see this was quite a normal, fancy gathering. No blood baths, no rituals. You weren’t looked at like fresh meat, although you couldn’t help notice the awe in some people’s eyes as they tried to glance at you. 

“Sylus…how powerful are you?” You asked, sipping on the wine. It was good, you craved more. Sylus cocks an eyebrow, a bit surprised at your question. 

“And what brought this on?” He asked. 

“Well…I knew you were powerful. But since we’ve been in this place it’s like everyone regards you as a higher being…” You hope that came out right, not wanting to offend him. There was just so much you didn’t know about him. You hear him scoff, for better or for worse.

“I have fought my way to the top. It wasn’t easy…I have always been unlucky,” he admitted. You weren’t exactly expecting him to open up so easily. “I’ll take what’s mine. I made sure that everyone knows my name, that’s all.” A beat of silence made it clear he was done talking. So much for opening up, you thought. You wondered what he used to be like before this power but knew it was not a question to ask. Not now, anyways. “You will find out in due time,” Sylus added, a bit quieter. Before you could question what he meant, a different man approaches Sylus. He stares at you, surprise in his eyes .

“You found her?” The man said, almost to himself. But you still heard him, feeling confused at his question. Sylus clears his throat and the man diverts his attention. “Ah! Sorry, sir. I came to inform you that we found him. We are holding him in a room for now, awaiting your orders.” The man bows deeply, not looking Sylus in the eyes as he speaks. You look at Sylus, curious about the situation. 

Sylus sighs. “I didn’t think he would be found so soon. This changes things a bit.” He looks at you, his eyebrows furrowed. He looked…mad. 

“Who?” You blurted. Maybe you didn’t want to know. It sounded like dirty business he was dealing with. 

“We’ve been looking for…someone,” he said vaguely. “I didn’t expect him to be caught here. I have to take care of it now.” He clenches his jaw, clearly irritated. It suddenly clicked in your mind that he meant he might leave you. Alone. The man who approached Sylus was still waiting to guide him away. “You’re safe here, as long as you wear that choker. Stay here. Do not leave,” he commanded, his voice stern. “I will only be a minute. Be good.” He pats you on the head once, like a child. He begins following the man before you have a chance to respond. 

You watch Sylus as he turns down a hallway, now out of sight. You swallow, trying to ease your nerves. You drink the rest of your wine, trying not to meet eyes with anyone else in here. He said he would only be a minute…But from what you’ve learned when someone wrongs Sylus, he likes to take his time. Or so he claims. You were a little thankful he didn’t bring you for something like that, despite being completely alone. You fidget with the choker, your mind recalling the man’s words. Found her…had Sylus always looked for you? This newfound thought bounced off your head, anxiety starting to creep in. 

“Ugh…” You groan to yourself, staring at the empty glass. 

“Would you like more wine, miss?” A male voice asked behind you. You turn around, trying to make yourself seem small to this stranger. As you meet his face, your stomach sinks to the ground.

“....Caleb?” You whispered, almost afraid to say his name out loud. His eyes are wide, frantic, staring all over you. 

“Act natural,” he whispered, barely audible. Your heart was in your throat, you couldn’t believe it. Caleb, your childhood best friend. He was practically the only family you had…before you were taken. It’s been months now, since you last saw him. Why was he here? Why now? How did he know you were here? Questions flooded your mind, your throat tightening. You had no idea how to begin speaking. 

“Why?” You whispered back, trying to calm yourself. You weren’t sure who was looking. God, if Sylus knew, he would probably be angered. This wasn’t good, every second passing by was a second of Sylus returning. You felt nauseous. 

“Are you hurt? Did he do anything to you? That monster—I swear to God. I’m here to save you, I’m getting you out of here.” The weight of his words barely sank into you. You still didn’t understand how he knew you were here. At a vampire gathering, too!

“Caleb, you can’t– you can’t be here. Caleb this isn’t safe,” you tried telling him, but he wouldn’t listen. “How did you know I was here? Tell me.” His gaze softened as he looked at you. His eyes glance at the necklace and his expression becomes horrified. 

“I know who he is. I’m not letting him take you again. I don’t care if I die trying.” He grabs your wrist with force. It made you wince. You had to stop this, before Sylus came back.

Time was running out. 

“Caleb you need to leave!” You said urgently. Sweat formed on your brow. “I’m fine. He doesn’t hurt me! Please, leave, I’m okay!” You said, a little louder this time. He tugs you with him, causing you to stumble. A few people look over at you, whispering to each other. Tears prick at the corner of your eyes as the panic becomes overwhelming. He tugs harder, trying to break you out of your stance. “Caleb please!” You beg through gritted teeth. Before he can say anything back, you feel a tall presence behind you. Your stomach churns, knowing Sylus has returned and is looking at Caleb. You don’t turn around as you watch Caleb drop your wrist, his face hardening with hatred.  “Well…you heard her,” he says, his voice deep and slow. He places both of his hands on each of your shoulders. “She said leave.”

[hopelesslygaysstuff]

Since the sparkling scarlet brain rot is setting in, do you have any thoughts about ss Wanda being possessive? Maybe someone is encroaching on her territory and y/n is oblivious or uncertain how to handle it since the person doing it is an important person in Wanda’s business?

Oooooh, yes I do!!

---

If someone approaches you at a bar, she's quick to step against your side, a possessive hand around your waist as she stares coldly at the poor, brave soul you attempted to speak to you

At parties her company throws, she's never far from you. She's instructed Henry to keep an eye on you, but you pretend like you don't know, smirking at the way Henry grinds on men who step too close to the two of you

One time, a barista flirted with you during a morning coffee run. You were, of course, adorably oblivious, but you could sense that Wanda was holding back her temper, and you quickly put two and two together. She fucked you roughly in the back of her car, her secluded parking spot providing just enough privacy so the rocking of her car wasn't seen. You left with multiple hickeys around your throat, Wanda's hand firmly in yours.

During an important meeting, Wanda once noticed a man from her accounting team eyeing you far too long to be comfortable. She beckoned you to her side, pulling your chair in close and resting her hand possessively on your thigh, smirking at the man when you flushed. He saw the look in her eyes and quickly looked away. The next day, he was gone, and you never saw him at another meeting again, a small brunette woman taking his place.

On days when Wanda feels her possessive side rising, she practically rips your clothes off once you return home. She doesn't let you leave the playroom until your body is covered in marks, her mark of ownership. She loves it when you put your collar on for her, the maroon leather standing out against the soft skin of your neck.

Ugh I miss Sparkling Scarlet Wanda ♡

[maidflowery]

POV: Aventurine Gave you his Perfume

Deep Sea Aurora

"Do you like that perfume so much? Why not drown in me instead?"

Tl;dr “Aventurine, c’mon now… you can’t be jealous of your own perfume?” 

Your boyfriend, Aventurine, would often go on a business trip, after which he'd bring home all sorts of trinkets and oddities from all over the world.

But this time, he gave you something before he went on a trip.

"Here, something to remember me by."

With a smile, Aventurine placed an intricate, square bottle in your hands. It had a deep cyan and teal gradient, encrusted with a silver and cyan shovel crest in the middle. The name “Carnaval Nocturne” was engraved at the bottom. 

Under the light, the colorful bottle shone like the Northern Light, mesmerizing you.

When you gave your wrist a quick spritz, you caught a whiff of the citrusy kumquat and red currant, ending with a harmonious floral symphony that blended an exquisite assortment of blooming flowers.

You noticed this scent immediately, it was the same as the one he always wore! 

You wouldn't deny that it got lonely sometimes, but with this, at least it'd feel as if he was there with you!

"Wooow! Aventurine! This is the best! Thank you so much!"

Seeing you hold the perfume like the world's most precious treasure, Aventurine flashed you his trademark smug grin. 

“Don’t bother thanking me—just promise me you’ll wear it everywhere you go. Deal?”

"Okay!"

And wear it everywhere, you did.

Little did you know, it was his way of marking you, and keeping the insects away while he was gone.

Unbeknownst to him, this plan would backfire immensely.

♤♤♤

Two weeks later, Aventurine was back from his business trip, but when he invited you out…

“Sorry, not today! I had a reunion with my highschool friends! Ugh, I’m so nervous, but with this perfume, I’m sure I’ll manage!”

And so on…

“I’m going to practice for a group presentation! This perfume always calms my nerves!” 

And so forth… 

“I need to study for my exam. Mr. Nocturne will be a great company for it! He helps me focus!” 

“...”

…”Mr. Nocturne”? It has a name now? 

Aventurine stared at your back as you walked away, off to handle whatever it was while clutching the perfume like a lucky charm. 

He felt complicated. Although it was great that his gift was boosting your productivity and all, why did it feel like you were spending more and more time with his perfume?

He gave it as a reminder of him, not a replacement?

“...Well, aren’t you brave?”

♤♤♤

That evening, you found your trusty partner and sidekick, Mr. Nocturne, missing from your drawer!

You immediately went to look for Aventurine, who had been home all day. Maybe you misplaced it, and he knows where it was? Even after he returned from his business trip, he still had work to do at home, usually lasting until the evening. 

So, to his room you go! 

“—Aventurine! Mr. Nocturne is missing!”

"Well, good evening to you, too. Welcome back. How was your day? Mine was the same as usual, by the way. Are you hungry? 'Cause I’m starving. What do you want for dinner? You know, just a few of the things you could’ve bothered to ask your boyfriend, along with a million other things. Oh, and a knock on the door, let’s not forget that one.”

Aventurine, who had just finished an online work meeting, was visibly taking off his elaborate attire, starting from his dainty jewels. The movement, initially careless and rushed, slowed when he noticed your arrival—and your gaze. 

“S-sorry… this is kind of an emergency…”

Aventurine’s grin widened, his smile growing more mischievous. His fingers rested on his black leather collar, leisurely unbuckling it, before sliding down to unbutton his shirt, revealing his slender, smooth neck.  

There was something hypnotizing about his movement, which made you unable to look away—until something gleaming caught your eye.

“AH! There it is!”

You found the missing Mr. Nocturne on top of his desk. Out of the corner of your eye, you could have sworn you saw Aventurine frown, but you were too relieved to think about it.

“Phew! I’ve been looking for it everywhere! Thank god—”

But just as you were about to reach for it, Aventurine swiftly grabbed Mr. Nocturne, pulling it out of your reach.

Then, with a flawless smile, he asked you, "Between me and Mr. Nocturne, which one do you like most?"

Suddenly, a suspicion arose in your mind.

“Aventurine, you… did you take Mr. Nocturne on purpose?”

He didn't answer and simply maintained his smile.

So, you had walked into a hostage situation all along!

“Aventurine, c’mon now… you can’t be jealous of your own perfume?” 

You tried to mediate the situation.

“Haha! That’s funny. How can someone be jealous of an inanimate object? If anything, I’m just looking out for you. My girlfriend’s overdependence on an object is getting rather concerning lately.” Aventurine chuckled, brushing it off as something silly. 

“How so?!”

Why did he make you sound like an addict?! 

“Oh, I’m sure you know what I’m referring to. It honestly reminds me of a certain anecdote. A boy, once afraid of the dark, overcame his fear after his mother gave him a protective necklace. As long as he had that necklace, he didn’t fear the dark. Naturally, his fear returned in full force once it went missing. So, what does it solve, really? That’s right, nothing.”

…What a long-winded speech. Still, the persuasive, convincing way he presented it made you doubt yourself for a moment. As expected of the Senior Manager of the Strategic Investment Department in IPC! 

Certainly, you couldn’t function without Mr. Nocturne lately. What started as a way to kickstart tasks quickly became a necessity before you could begin anything. It was certainly… concerning. 

“...So, I should stop using Mr. Nocturne?” you asked him dejectedly, your shoulders drooping.

While you were lowering your head, you heard him say, “…Do you like that perfume so much?”

Although you couldn’t make out his expression, his tone no longer held any hint of a smile. Instead, it sounded sulky.

"If you're asking whether I like it, then of course... it's something you gave me."

After a brief silence, Aventurine spoke, “Then, why not drown in me instead?” his tone laced with irresistible temptation. 

Wondering what that could possibly mean, you raised your head, just in time to see him tilt the perfume slightly. The falling droplets glittered, splashing against his exposed chest. Some trickled down the gilded cutout, outlining the reverse heart shape.

You unconsciously gulped. 

"Good girl... you're being honest, aren't you? How is it? I heard this place smells the nicest.”

…Huh?

Before you knew it, you were pressed against his chest, with him tenderly stroking your head. Moreover, the intoxicating fragrance of fruits, flowers, and him were pervading your senses.

Where am I?

Who am I?

There was a brief gap in your memory.

All you could recall was how his chest gradually came closer and closer into view, even though he never left his spot. 

Your legs had betrayed you, didn’t they?!

Belatedly, you noticed that you were hugging him close—with both arms, to boot.

…And these arms too!!

“Aventurine, this is…!!”

You let go of him and looked up, trying to explain, a large hand gently pushed your head back to where it had been.

“Hey!” 

You protested amidst the firm tenderness that enveloped you.

“…Won’t you tell me?”

Once again, you couldn’t see his expression. Yet, the unmistakable care and affection in his tone caught you by surprise.

“T-tell you what?” you asked, flustered. 

“You use Mr. Nocturne whenever you’re facing something difficult or feeling down. So, won’t you tell me? What’s wrong?” 

“It’s… not important.” 

Gently, his fingertips cupped your chin, lifting it so you faced him.

“It is to me.”

Violet-cyan eyes bore into yours, filled with concern and worry. 

“I-it really isn’t, besides, you seem busy…” you insisted. 

“Nonsense. I’ll always have time for you. What else would I be doing? You should lean on me a bit more …or am I that unreliable to you?” Aventurine smiled wryly, his eyes narrowing sadly.

Argh!

“...Okay, I get it, already! But promise you won’t laugh…”

Finally, you told him what was going on. 

“So, you’re worried about posting your writing, thinking that no one will like it?”

Aventurine summarized it while folding his arms. 

“Yeah, basically… I-I told you it wasn’t important…” 

You lowered your gaze in shame. 

You couldn’t believe you troubled your trillionaire, goal-driven, high-profile boyfriend with your gripe about the story you posted in Ao4!?!?

But then, Aventurine took your hand in his. 

As he earnestly peered into your eyes, he smiled and asked you, “What’s 10% of the world?”

“Huh…?” you were caught off-guard. 

Instead of offering a word of encouragement or reassurance, he asked you a mathematical question. Naturally, you couldn’t come up with an answer, at least not right away. 

Besides, knowing him, was he telling you to just gamble at it?

"Let’s say there are 8 billion people in the world. What is 10% of 8 billion?"

“Uhm…”

“Or, what is 1% of 8 billion?”

“...A lot, probably.”

"That's right. The world is vast. Can you really be sure that no one will like what you created?”

“...!” 

You finally understood what he was trying to say. 

Seeing the look of realization on your face, Aventurine beamed. 

“It’s 80 thousand by the way. You’re welcome.”

“Aventurine… Thank you so much! I won’t give up! Now, to the drawing board I go!”

Brimming with motivation, you spun toward the door, about to rush back to your room! 

Suddenly, he was right behind you, pressing his body against yours. He trapped you against the door, catching your wrist, which was about to reach for the doorknob. Then, he leaned in and whispered right into your ear.

"...And spend more time away from me? Not a chance."

Briefly, you wondered if Mr. Nocturne was just a bait to lure you in here. 

♤♤♤

"‘...Knight Captain’s Leonard had hair as white as snow, and carmine eyes reminiscent of blood,’ huh? A direct reflection to his ice block personality and tragic, murderous past, no doubt. Well, this is enlightening. I never knew you had such preferences."

“Shut it! White hair is pretty, especially when coupled with red eyes! And he’s just misunderstood!” 

“Yeah, yeah, you couldn’t have stressed that enough with this paragraph over here. ‘It turns out that the Knight Captain’s heart is snow-white, just as he is a virgin and maidenless.’” 

"Hey! Don’t read it out loud! And I never wrote that last part! Stop altering my story as you please!"

…And the consensus that the two of you reached was, this.

You sat on his lap, a laptop resting atop yours. Aventurine rested his chin on your shoulder and read the whole thing. 

That was how you found out that your greatest motivator was also your harshest critic.

"I’m not altering it. This is basically what you wrote: Knight Captain Leonard waited a whole decade just to say hi to his beloved maiden. Which part of him contradicts what I said, exactly?"

“What I’m trying to emphasize here is his loyalty and sincerity!” 

“Ah, yes. Great job on that one—I love how he worries over every little thing, perfectly ruining the mood and stalling progress. Well, that explains why we’re chapter 86 and handholding is still the peak of his romantic efforts. I’m on the edge of my seat right now—the gripping tale of the chaste Knight Captain Leonard as he embarks on a journey to find a safeword.”

"That's it! Aventurine, whatever grudge you have against quiet, dignified knights ends today! Knights are the epitome of grace and honor—chiseled features, noble hearts, and unwavering loyal—”

Before you could finish your sentence, he sealed your lips with his, stealing your breath away. Fiercely, he claimed every inch of your lips, as if demanding all of you. Then, he ended it with an angry bite on your upper lips.

“I get it. Now stop swooning over another man.”

▼△▼△▼△▼△▼

No, I wasn't put by Hoyo to make this. This is simply self-indulgent. Anyone who wants to buy me Churin's perfume is free to slide into my DM, though. 🕶️

[iamgonnagetyouback]

Hi Ivy, congrats on your 1k celebration! Very well deserved. I'm here to request for a frost bite please? Rivals to lovers, Theodore Nott, Maroon by Taylor Swift. Thank you, sweet angel!

Thank you so much, Em!! And I think you meant Story in a shell but that's alright! Hope you like it <33

ivy's 1k celebration 🦪 navigation 🦪 characters

ˋ°•*⁀➷ THEODORE NOTT rivals to lovers with maroon by taylor swift

The remnants of shattered wine glasses sparkled like fallen stars on the floor, catching the dim, flickering candlelight of the Slytherin common room. You hated him. Truly, deeply, venomously hated him.

And yet, here you were.

"You're insufferable," you hissed, clutching the hem of your now-ruined blouse, burgundy streaks soaking through the fabric, sticking it to your skin. Theo lounged lazily against the arm of the worn leather couch, his own wine glass dangling carelessly from his fingertips. His sharp jawline tilted as he surveyed you, eyes dark, unreadable.

“Am I?” His voice was smooth, low, a taunting drawl.

“Yes,” you snapped, stepping closer despite yourself. "You ruined my shirt, you—"

"You ruined my night," he interrupted, pushing himself up to his full height. His presence loomed, casting a shadow over you, the faintest smirk tugging at his lips. "So I guess we're even now."

The tension crackled between you like lightning, neither of you willing to back down. This was always how it went—every glance, every word, every goddamn interaction with Theo Nott felt like standing too close to a storm. Dark, uncontrollable, and utterly intoxicating.

“You’re a bastard, Nott,” you spat, stepping closer still.

"And you’re a hypocrite," he countered, his smirk deepening as his eyes fell to the wine-stained fabric clinging to your chest. “Judging me, but you don’t seem too eager to leave, do you?”

Your breath hitched. The wine wasn’t the only thing making your skin burn now.

“Maybe I just like watching you embarrass yourself,” you shot back, voice steady, even as your pulse thundered in your ears.

He chuckled, a dark, deep sound that reverberated in the small space between you. "Is that what you tell yourself, princess?"

Before you could respond, he took a step forward, then another, until the space between you vanished completely. The scent of him—spice and something impossibly warm—invaded your senses.

“You hate me,” he murmured, his breath brushing against your cheek, “and I can’t fucking stand you.”

Your eyes flickered up to his, and you couldn’t decide if you wanted to slap him or drag him closer. Maybe both. Instead, you let out a shaky exhale, and your lips curled into a spiteful grin.

“Good,” you whispered, your voice a breathless tremor against his mouth. “I hate you too.”

His lips crashed into yours.

It wasn’t soft or sweet. It was rough, almost bruising, all teeth and fire, like neither of you could decide whether to kiss or bite. His hands found your waist, tugging you closer, and your fingers twisted into the front of his shirt, pulling him down with as much anger as passion.

The kiss was a battlefield—push and pull, venom and desire. When he finally pulled back, his lips hovered near your ear, his voice a husky whisper that made your knees threaten to give out.

“Trust me,” he said, his tone low, dark, and dripping with amusement. “The feeling’s mutual.”

You looked up at him, flushed and breathless, your voice barely audible as you muttered:

“Shut up and kiss me again.”

And he did.

In the end, it wasn’t the shattered glass or the ruined blouse that lingered. It was him—the taste of wine and smoke on his lips, the feel of his hands, the undeniable, fiery pull between you both.

It was maroon.

[yridenergyridenergy]

Live report - Tour24 Who Is This Hell For? 2024/11/21 at Zepp Sapporo

Setlist:

Ruten no tou

AMON

Hageshisa to, kono mune no naka de karamitsuita shakunetsu no yami

Keigaku no yoku

Magayasou

Celebrate Empty Howls

Mitsu to tsuba

DIABOLOS

VINUSHKA

OBSCURE

Ochita koto no aru sora

The Inferno

-encore-

The Devil In Me

Values of Madness

Uroko

Eddie

My thoughts overall today are:

- so many echoes of Kyo's voice!

- This took me back to the first few times I saw Dir en grey live, in Canada, and the first times in Japan too. Times that were easier, where I was doing fine. The last time I saw them in Sapporo, in 2019, was also literally the beginning of this somewhat debilitating medical condition, caused by my own mistake. Therefore, this whole setlist, the songs and their meaning, conveyed a lot for me in this instance.

Shinya walked on stage dressed in all white. For some reason, it seemed like it was the first time that I could see him properly at his drum set. He was a literal prince! He looked so majestic, so strong. Magayasou especially was HIS time to shine! His drumming is so disorganized, and there was almost rancour and disdain behind one of his side hits during one of the songs, like if anybody had been standing there, they would have been utterly knocked out before they could blink. Also, regarding Shinya, Die tried to interact, but it seemed like Toshiya was the one who was successful in catching Shinya's glance, unless Shinya would have looked that way whether Toshiya was standing there or not hah. And it seemed to me like Shinya was truly peering at us from time to time, which I'd somehow never noticed.

Die was wearing some kind of light black tunic on top of a black tank top whose collar was very low, and he had leather short shorts on top of tights with a swirly design.

Regarding Die, the verdict is clear: he mouths total nonsense hahah. It really isn't the lyrics most of the time. He's just pumping us up by gaping his mouth a few times. He smiled so much throughout the show. I can't remember which song it was, but when it ended, he looked so ecstatic and proud, it reminded me of a high school girl finishing the performance of her life! I think that image stems from how young and happy he looked hah. His long hair kept getting stuck on his guitars.

Toshiya wore a black satin outfit with loooong panels below the sleeves. He had not only his thighs but his shoulders bare too. He had at least some lipstick, from what I remember. Toshiya was totally dramatic and expressive, like we know him to be hah.

Kaoru always impresses me by how he doesn't appear to sweat, and yet he wears the most layers in the band! He had the entire emperor look, baggy pants tucked into high boots, kind of like a horse rider, and the white dress shirt, cape, etc. He had makeup to accentuate his temples, as well as a bit of lining around his eyes, I think?

Kyo came on stage last of course, wearing all black. T-shirt tucked into clean black straight pants, black ribbed socks and shiny black work shoes. No makeup whatsoever. His hair was maybe an inch long. The tattoo next to his right eye is really visible, but this time I was on the kamite side, so I couldn't observe it much. And yeah, he has filled up the space below his jaw to outline his face. It looks like random lines: what pops up is a circular space left almost blank in the centre of his throat like to indicate where to do a tracheotomy, one line left blank on the sides, his Damned tattoo, and the two melded faces on the right side of his neck. If "Truth" is still written below his chin, it's barely distinguishable. Kyo's barbed wire tattoo sticks out a lot from his hairline at the top, despite the length of his hair right now.

It seemed like Kyo got really into the songs mostly at Diabolos. He also peeked at his lyrics memo sheets a lot, not that I blame him.

Ruten no tou was really cool. After "Sora yo", Kyo's voice is doubled in canon echoes, until the part where, in the studio recording, he does a light-pitched sigh, but in this live performance, it was merely an exhale.

The audience would have left Ruten no tou to end and transition into the next song in silence if I hadn't initiated a cheer, which happened a couple of other times. The only moment where we did let the band transition in silence was after Keigaku no yoku, because it would have been super inappropriate to cheer after he ended the song in: "Ore wa sakebu... HAYAKU SHINEEE!!" He ad-libbed Keigaku no yoku for at least the first half. No real clue what he said, it sounded like he was murmuring with the mic too close to his lips. Oh and it was awesome when they echoed Kyo's high-pitched sounds after the harder parts.

AMON was quite cool too. I don't remember anything special right now, other than that it was yet another moment where Shinya's drumming shone.

Hageshisa to, and frankly all of the other songs too, seemed to get the reaction that the band wanted. Everyone pitched in and headbanged as usual. Kyo had us sing a few parts and he did the traditional a capella: "Dive, like hell, and desTROY". Toshiya did his spins with very wide and dramatic movements, but it was clearly because there was no other way to avoid his super long sleeve fabric from interfering with him playing the bass hah.

Magayasou, I literally paid attention mostly to Shinya because of how badass his drumming is in that song. I just remember that I've definitely seen Kyo way more involved in that song in the past, but not now.

Oh, I don't recall which song exactly it was in the first few, but it was funny seeing Kaoru and Die hurry back from the edge of the stage to their mics whenever they realized that: "Oops, I've got backup vocals in 3, 2, 1..." Toshiya almost seemed to follow Kaoru with his stare when it happened like Kaoru snapped out of a trance.

During Celebrate Empty Howls, it feels like the performance was even more energetic from Kyo and the others when I last saw it in an assigned-seat hall. Either way, it involved Toshiya, Die and Kaoru coming to the front to tease us, switching sides once in a while. Toshiya's always all smiles, while Kaoru at most winks stoically hah.

The second pause happened between Celebrate Empty Howls and Mitsu to Tsuba, which felt kind of awkward. Overall, I felt like adding one or two Inward Screams would have livened up Kyo's performance slightly, or at least greatly changed it and the atmosphere of the songs.

Mitsu to Tsuba is mostly Die's time to shine. He knows the effect he has on us and he likes all the distortions he can get out of his guitar.

By the way, other than the SE, I actually don't recall seeing much AI-generated footage in the backdrop videos! The SE had images of a hooded stalker of sorts walking toward a bridge at night, a clown, photographs transposed in a circle to piece together probably someone supposed to be a criminal, etc. The music is a bit unmemorizable, but it had a beat that prompted us to clap to it while we waited for Shinya to show up.

Diabolos was amazing! Die was almost mocking us laughing during the segments where we headbang for three consecutive parts, which happens two other times in the song. I don't know if people seemed tired.

Kyo had us shouting "Blue Velvet" a couple of times. But the song evoked a lot in him, it showed. He was really into it.

The backdrop video of Diabolos caught my attention because it seems like when we sing about "Blue Velvet", we're... cooking a pig? There's just a charred pig head on a cut tree trunk, along with other imagery that makes it clear that the pig was cooked. An African tribesman with white lines of makeup all over his face and body is shown afterward. I'm not sure that that is ever what I would have associated with "Blue Velvet".

Oh, it was crazy, the anticipation building up to the "Saa ningen o yamero" part of this song. Kyo just shouted each line with deep breaks in between, to punch each point. Reading the official lyrics again, I'm pretty sure that Kyo completely changed the lyrics before "Saa ningen o yamero", actually, because it involved more stuff like: "You, and my self too, "

I think it might have been in Diabolos that Toshiya copied Kyo's stance with their left hand raised, leaning backward with their side facing us. It must have been during the climax line: " I raise my vacant eyes toward the sky".

Vinushka, again, I've seen Kyo more intense in this song in some live recordings, but it was nice and felt anyway. For some reason, the parallel between Kyo bringing his mic slowly toward his mouth for the "Aaaah... Vinushka" part while the background video shows the nuclear bomb approaching the viewer from above only just struck me. It's the same movement of two points slowly connecting to express impeding doom, that seems calm and quiet before the explosion.

Obscure involved a lot of headbanging, Toshiya spinning, etc. We didn't see much hah.

Ochita koto no aru sora started kind of like before Obscure finished, it took me a while to recognize the melody. Kyo had us sing some parts. I was really looking forward to witnessing this song live for the first time!

The Inferno came and I knew that it was the last song of the main setlist, which happened way too quickly! Sure, there were two long songs, but it felt way too short! Kyo wanted us to participate in the song a few times and he gestured the cut-throat at the very start and a couple of other times throughout the song, but I don't think he headbanged himself.

Kyo threw his mic backward JUST short of Shinya's drum set and walked off the stage before the song had even finished, leaving the other members to complete the last bit of the melody. Die was especially happy, he stayed behind to play moooore distortion, as long as he could, several seconds after everybody else had left the stage. His smile was wide!

The members returned for the encore rather quickly considering that Toshiya's assistant was still tuning his bass hah. Shinya had a sleeveless black shirt with the super big gold necklace in the style that he, Kaoru and Kyo have worn since The Perfume of Sins! Die has cut the sleeves from the black 27-years sweater but he was still wearing mostly the same clothes underneath. His arms are really defined, but Toshiya has totally surpassed him in muscle mass, woah. Buffest member in the band. Kaoru only took off his cape; how the hell does he not sweat! Toshiya had the grey sweater from the tour merch and his pants/boots with his thighs exposed. Kyo hadn't changed.

Although he did it once, or max twice during the main set, Kyo egged us on with "Sapporo!" several times in the encore, asking us over and over whether we could go on, become one, etc.

Oh man, The Devil In Me! I still completely disagree with the band's decision to rely heavily on backtracks, especially for the part "Jinkaku hitei o abite" which literally was recorded by the backup vocalists? What the fuck. But it's so cool and intense to watch Kyo lose it, growling, folding, swinging his mic cord up and down as he pours his self-hate. For the last minute or so of the song, he climbed on his crate, wrapped his red mic cord around his neck without theatrics, and sang with just enough length of the cord to follow his right arm as it curled toward his mouth. Otherwise, if he extended his arm too much, it would have tightened the noose. At the end of the song, while the instrumental continues for quite a while, he slowly sheds, or rather shrugs off one part of the mic cord from him. First, the noose is undone. Then, the cord draped on his left shoulder is shrugged off, which leaves just the one on his right side, which comes off while he stares almost in challenge at the horizon. Shedding a weight from his shoulders, from his existence literally, but not looking 100% relieved whatsoever.

Values of Madness has me headbanging intensely, so I'm not sure what happened, to be honest. Die was smiling, I think. Kyo stayed quiet to demand us to sing sometimes, which he seemed satisfied with. I don't know if it was in this song or another one, but Kyo was stalking his way in front of his crate when he must have stomped on his mic cord, because he stopped abruptly on his track to fix that before a real problem occurred.

In all three of the last songs, it was funny because the members would visit different sides of the stage, then went back to their spot when the song ended, but then another hyper song started and they went right back out there, repeating this dance once more for Eddie hah.

For the last song, Kyo asked us if we could go on, and he seemed taken aback by the response he got from the shimote side on the left, because he was like: "Huh? Are you alive?" So then that part of the crowd finally put their all into the cheer. Kyo turned to the kamite, and it sounded like we were way more at 100% intensity than shimote from the start. He asked us a second time anyway, and then, after a second of quiet on his part, he did his sudden a capella crescendo: "aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAHH" with his 'claw' rising progressively, which had us all jumping and cheering. Eddie started and Kyo asked us to sing some parts, sometimes taking off his ear monitor. It wasn't clear on his face whether he was satisfied though, so probably not.

Kyo threw one of his water bottles kind of carelessly into the crowd, letting the cap and straw disconnect and all the water spray randomly onto us. Then, he promptly left. Shinya took a long time to come down from his platform, it seemed. Toshiya and Die had already started throwing picks and water. Die did the fountain/water sprouting move from close to his chest, like we saw him do in one or two videos. Toshiya and him sprayed us so much, they seemed to take a lot of pleasure in it. All three who were left on stage threw picks for a while, and I remember Kaoru stoically waving his index at us, as though teasing or chastising us for some reason hah.

Toshiya left with a smile and a modest bow and hand wave. Kaoru also waved us goodbye after throwing everything he had. Die was last, throwing his towel far but not close to the balcony like he sometimes aims to do. He intently looks at whoever catches his towel, like it means a lot to him to watch their reaction. He was really all smiles, mouthing stuff that resembled "arigatou" to us, and then he waved at us on his final way out.

What a blast, overall! I'm probably forgetting some stuff, but less than if I tried to write this live report any other time after today. I hope they play the setlist with Phenomenon in Sendai!

Oh and at one point, I was like: "Who the hell is filming the show with their cellphone? They played the reminder of the rules so often and so clearly." But it was Fujieda filming Shinya, so I guess that's the video we're getting tomorrow hah.

[m4rv3l-girl]

Courting in Bloom

Bucky x Y/N

Bucky is a 40s gentleman, through and through…

Warnings: Heart melting fluff!

The vase of fresh daisies on the windowsill.

It had been refilled just yesterday, another token of affection from Bucky. Your eyes lingered on the delicate petals, still glistening with dew, and you couldn’t help but smile. Since you and Bucky had started dating, flowers had become a staple in your life.

They came in all shapes, colors, and meanings—roses, daisies, tulips, even the occasional bunch of wildflowers. And each time, Bucky would hand them to you with the gentlest smile, sometimes with a shy shrug, as if the gesture didn’t make your heart flip every single time.

It was charming, old-fashioned, and so quintessentially him.

Today’s delivery was a bouquet of peach and pink roses, wrapped in soft brown paper with a ribbon tied at the base. He had arrived at your door late last night, his metal hand carefully holding the bouquet, his human hand tucked into his jacket pocket.

“Did you know these mean ‘gratitude and admiration’?” he had recited, voice soft but proud.

And, of course, your heart had melted on the spot.

🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹

The next day, you were still admiring the roses when the doorbell rang. Padding across the room in your socks, you opened the door to find Bucky standing there, looking every bit the gentleman in a navy sweater and his favorite leather jacket.

“Morning, Doll,” he greeted, his deep blue eyes lighting up as they met yours. In his hand was another bouquet—this time, a mix of daisies and baby’s breath.

“Bucky,” you laughed, stepping aside to let him in. “Another one? At this rate, I’m going to need more vases.”

His grin was boyish as he leaned down to press a kiss to your temple. “Can’t help it, Kitten. You deserve the world, and flowers are just the start.”

The day passed in a cozy rhythm. Bucky had insisted on taking you out for lunch at the little diner down the street, the one that reminded him of home. He told you stories from the ’40s as you shared a milkshake, his face lighting up with nostalgia.

“Back then,” he said, swirling his straw in the glass, “courting was serious business. You didn’t just date—you courted. There were flowers, dances, handwritten letters…” He trailed off, a wistful smile tugging at his lips.

“You’re a hopeless romantic, aren’t you?” you teased, though your voice was fond.

He shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “Maybe. But if it means making my best girl happy, I’ll take it.”

You raised an eyebrow, resting your chin on your palm as you leaned over the diner table. “Oh yeah? So what else does ‘courting’ entail, Sergeant Barnes? Should I be expecting serenades under my window or maybe a sonnet or two?”

Bucky’s grin widened, and he let out a soft laugh, the sound so warm and genuine it felt like a blanket wrapping around you. “Well, if I could sing worth a damn, I’d be out there with a guitar right now. But poetry…” He leaned back, rubbing his jaw thoughtfully. “You just might get that. Don’t think I’ve forgotten the Shakespeare book you left on your coffee table last week. I’ve been doing my homework.”

“You’ve been reading Shakespeare?” you asked, incredulous but undeniably charmed.

“Of course,” he replied, smirking. “A guy’s gotta keep up with his girl’s tastes. ‘Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?’” He paused for dramatic effect, the smirk shifting into something softer as his gaze locked on yours. “Nah, doesn’t do you justice. You’re more of a spring morning—warm, soft, and full of life.”

The compliment hit you straight in the chest, and you felt your cheeks heat as you reached for your water glass, trying to hide your flustered smile. “You’re ridiculous,” you murmured, though the warmth in your voice betrayed how much his words had affected you.

“Maybe,” he admitted, still watching you with that fond, unwavering gaze. “But if ridiculous makes you blush like that, Doll, I’ll stick with it.”

You shook your head, biting back a grin. “Okay, Mr. Shakespeare. What else did courting in your day involve? Or are we talking purely sonnets and flowers?”

Bucky hummed, pretending to consider it as he traced patterns on the table with his metal hand. “Let’s see… There were dinners like this one, walks through the park, maybe a movie if we were feeling modern. But it wasn’t just about the gestures. It was about intention. Showing the person you cared, not just saying it.”

Your heart softened at his words, and you reached across the table, your fingers brushing over his. “You’re doing a pretty good job of that, you know.”

His eyes lifted to meet yours, and for a moment, the bustling diner seemed to fade away. The way he looked at you—like you were the only person in the world—made your chest tighten in the best way.

“Well,” he said, his voice dropping to a quiet, almost vulnerable tone, “I meant it when I said you deserve the world. I may not be able to give you that, but I can try my damnedest to make you feel like you have it.”

You squeezed his hand, unable to suppress the smile breaking across your face. “You do, Bucky. Every single day.”

🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷🌷

By the time you got back to your apartment, the sun was setting, painting the sky in hues of orange and pink. Bucky had another surprise in store—he’d planned a quiet evening in, complete with a homemade dinner.

You sat on the couch, watching as he moved around the kitchen with surprising ease. He was focused, brows furrowed as he chopped vegetables with precision.

“You know,” you said, breaking the silence, “you don’t have to go to all this trouble for me.”

He glanced over his shoulder, a soft smile playing on his lips. “It’s not trouble, Darling. It’s… what’s the word? A privilege.”

You were leaning your elbow on the counter as you watched him chop the carrots with a surprising precision that would’ve made a professional chef jealous. “A privilege, huh? You really are something else, Barnes. Most guys these days just show up with takeout and call it a night.”

He paused, setting the knife down as he turned to face you, resting his hip against the counter. “Well, I’m not most guys, am I, Doll?” His smile was soft, but there was an unmistakable sincerity in his tone. “I grew up in a time when showing someone you cared meant more than just saying it. Actions speak louder than words. I guess… I like knowing you can see it.”

Your chest tightened at his words, and you couldn’t stop yourself from stepping closer. You reached up, brushing a lock of dark hair back from his forehead. “You know I see it, right? You don’t have to bring me flowers every day or make dinner to prove anything to me. You’ve already got me, Bucky. Completely.”

His gaze softened even further, if that were possible, and his hands found your waist, warm and steady. “I know,” he murmured, his voice low and tender. “But it’s not about proving anything. It’s about reminding you, every chance I get, how much you mean to me. After everything, I don’t take things like this for granted. I don’t take you for granted.”

Your throat tightened, and you felt the familiar sting of tears threatening to spill. “You’re going to make me cry,” you said, laughing softly as you blinked them away.

Bucky smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to your forehead. “Not my intention, Kitten. But if those are happy tears, I’ll take it.”

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug, and he held you close, his metal arm cool against your back and his human hand warm against your side. The steady beat of his heart under your cheek felt like home.

“Have I told you lately how much I love you?” you whispered, voice muffled against his chest.

“Not since this morning,” he teased, his tone light. Then, softer, “But it’s always nice to hear. I love you too, Darling. More than you’ll ever know.”

You pulled back, tilting your head to look up at him, and he leaned down to kiss you—slow and sweet, like he had all the time in the world. By the time you pulled away, the carrots on the cutting board had been forgotten, and the smell of something slightly overcooking on the stovetop broke the moment.

“Oh no,” you said, laughing as you turned toward the stove. “Your romantic dinner might be in jeopardy.”

Bucky chuckled, his hands still resting lightly on your waist. “Eh, it’s just the carrots. You’re worth a little burnt dinner, Kitten.”

“Careful, Barnes,” you shot back playfully, grabbing a spoon to stir the pot. “Keep talking like that, and I might start expecting burnt meals on the regular.”

“I’ll try to pace myself,” he replied, grinning as he grabbed the knife again. “But don’t say I didn’t warn you. I’m not exactly a five-star chef.”

“Lucky for you,” you said, glancing over your shoulder to flash him a smile, “I don’t need fancy. I just need you.”

And with that, the two of you fell into an easy rhythm again—him chopping, you stirring, laughter and light banter filling the kitchen. It was simple, domestic, and perfect in a way that felt almost too good to be true.

The evening ended with the two of you curled up on the couch, the remnants of dinner forgotten on the coffee table. Bucky had one arm wrapped around your shoulders, the other holding a small book he’d found on your shelf.

“Do you ever get tired of being so perfect?” you murmured, your voice laced with drowsiness.

He chuckled, pressing a kiss to your hair. “Perfect? Nah, Doll. Just lucky to have you.”

You tilted your head to look up at him, your heart swelling with affection. “I think I’m the lucky one.”

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

The next morning, you woke to find another bouquet on your bedside table—a mix of sunflowers and daisies, with a little card tucked inside.

To my Darling Y/N, it read. Here’s to another day of making you smile.

And, of course, you did…

——————————————————————————————————

Hope you guys like this sickly sweet one (It was fun to write!) Make sure to leave a comment, or even a request if you liked it! 🫶

Requests Open!

[mattybbernard]

Casual (Matt Sturniolo)

Pairing: Fwb!Matt x Fem!Reader

Summery: Based on “Casual” by Chappell Roan

Warnings: smut (MDNI), p in v, fingering, oral (f!receiving), squirting, public sex, car sex, swearing and strong language, filthy dirty talk, breeding kink, afab reader, no use of Y/N, use of random names (feel free to change it idrc), maybe more?

A/N: Erm, hey y’all, this is my first fic ever as well as my first time writing smut so please be kind. I’m also terrible at grammar and spelling and I wrote this in one sitting. I also did not proofread this so….have fun?

My friends call me a loser, 'cause I'm still hanging around. I've heard so many rumours, that I'm just a girl that you bang on your couch. I thought you thought of me better, someone you couldn't lose. You said, "We're not together", so now when we kiss, I have anger issues.

Three hours. Matt had texted you three hours ago and of course you replied right away, but he’s yet to read it.

Girls night at Payton’s house was supposed to be fun, a way to kick off summer by relaxing and drinking and gossiping. All of your friends who had gone off the college or university had come back to Boston for the summer, and you had taken the weekend off from your shitty waitressing job to spend time with them; but of course your focus was pulled away from your friends, and by Matt of all people. When your and Matt’s relationship went from a simple platonic friendship to something messier you had immediately told Peyton, to which she said that you’re way to beautiful and intelligent to be in a situationship of all things, especially at your age.

You looked down at your phone,

Read,

Peyton sat down beside you with a drink in her hands. “What’s going on with you?” She asked.

“Nothing.” You huffed and flopped back against the couch like a child.

“Don’t tell me you’re still talking to Matt.” Payton scolded.

“It’s not like I want to! He won’t go away!” Peyton gave you an unimpressed and unconvinced look. “Okay, so maybe I am. So what?”

“Babe, how many times have I told you, he’s a loser who refuses to see the gorgeous girl right in front of him. Drop him.” Peyton sighed.

“It’s not that easy-”

“Not to be bitchy or anything, but the more you cling onto this mess, the more of a loser you become.” Peyton cut you off before standing up to let her words sink in.

You said, "Baby, no attachment", but we're knee deep in the passenger seat, and you're eating me out, is it casual now?

“Jesus! Fuck!” You cried out as the hand that isn’t in Matt’s hair flies back to grasp at the headrest in his car.

“That feel good baby?” Matt mumbles again your exposed heat, before wrapping his lips around your swollen clit again.

A mess of jumbled syllables tumbles from your mouth along with a string of whimpers and moans. Matt’s hands keep a firm grip on the inside of your thighs, pushing them open for him as he sits on his heels on the dirty floor of the passenger’s side, as you stay sitting and spread out for him on the leather seat.

“Ugh, fuck you taste so good.” He groans as he likes a hard flat stripe from your hole to your puffy nub. His tongue instantly enters you at a rapid and aggressive pace. “C’mon baby, I know you’re close.”

“Mhm. Fuck.” You mumble from above him.

“I know baby, I know.” He coos as he switches from tongue fucking you to his fingers, the cold rings on his hands sending goosebumps up your ass and back. “Gonna cum for me?”

All you could do was nod your head, eyes closed and mouth clamped shut in ecstasy.

“Do it, c’mon, fucking cum all over me.” He egg’s you on.

The second he feels you stiffen and your legs begin to shake and tremble, he rips his fingers from your entrance. A stream of clear liquid gushes out of you and onto Matt’s face. The moans you let out at the sight of him opening his mouth to catch your release are borderline pornographic. His right hand comes up to your mound and he quickly brushes his fingers over you, causing the liquid to splatter across his face and the interior of his car.

“Fuck.” He grumbles and slurps up the puddle of liquid that remains on your pussy. “Atta girl.” He chuckles before placing a firm slap to your red and sensitive centre.

“Ah, fuck. Jesus Christ, Matt.” You scolded him as you sit up.

“You wanna come in?” He ignores your glare.

“Aren’t your parents and brothers home?”

“Yeah, so? They know we’re friends.” Matt shrugs as if he didn’t just finger fuck your brains out and then call you his friend.

It's hard being casual when my favorite bralette is in your dresser.

You sat against Matts headboard, his childhood sheets clutched in your hands to cover your naked body. It was early, about seven am, but you couldn’t be here when his family got up, you knew the rules.

You reached down to grab your underwear and sweat pants off Matts floor and began to slip them on as quietly as possible so you didn’t wake him up. You stood up and grabbed your shirt off the floor and bringing it up to cover your bare chest as you searched for your favourite bralette. You couldn’t find it at your apartment and the only other logical place it could be is in Matts room. As you tiptoed around his room to try and find it you landed on his dresser, quickly running over to it you pulled the top drawer out and began digging, and low and behold your baby blue bralette sat crumpled at the bottom of his sock drawer. Throwing the bra on, followed by your t-shirt and shoes, you stumbled out his room and left his house.

He said we were friends. You thought. But he kept my favourite bralette?

I know what you tell your friends. Baby, get me off again.

You’re pathetic. Why on earth would anyone with the littlest shred of self respect spend their day off texting a guy who clearly has no interest in her besides getting in her pants? Apparently you would.

All day you had been sending texts to Matt, and every time he left you on read.

“Haven’t spoken to u in a while.”

“U good?”

“Did you want to go see a movie later? I heard that new Deadpool Vs. Wolverine movie is supposed to be good.”

“Matt?”

“Matthew?”

Not a single reply until now. Desperate to see him you texted him the one thing you knew he couldn’t pass up.

“Miss u. U free tn?”

Not even a second later his reply came in.

“Be here in 10.”

I fucked you in the bathroom when we went to dinner. Your parents at the table, you wonder why I'm bitter.

You looked at yourself in the dirty restaurant bathroom mirror, leaning on your hands that rested on the sink. With a deep sigh you reached into your purse to pull out your lipgloss, but right as you finished reapplying the product the bathroom door swung open. Assuming it was just another girl who needed to pee, you didn’t look at who entered. That is until you saw Matt appear in the mirror behind you.

“What the-” you began but was interrupted by Matt kissing you deeply, his arms wrapping around your waist so he could grip your ass.

“Matt.” You gasped between kisses. “This-” his mouth trailed from your lips to your jaw. “This is the ladies room.” You whimpered as he began to suck at your neck. “You can’t…you can’t be in here. Someone will-”

“It’s a good thing I locked the door then.” He smirked before lifting you of the ground and placing you on the sink.

He kissed you again and slipped a cold hand under your black t-shirt as the other ones tried to go up your red maxi skirt .

“Why’s your skirt so god damn long?” Matt huffed in frustration.

“I don’t know. Maybe because I don’t wanna have my ass hanging out in front of your parents.” You sassed.

Matt rolled his eyes as he continued to try and yank your skirt up.

“You’re not seriously gonna fuck me in gin a public bathroom.”

“God, do you ever stop complaining?” He groaned

“Whatever.” You mumbled and lifted you hips to help him pull your skirt up all the way. Matt unbuckled his belt and slid his pants and boxers down his legs enough for his dick to spring free. He shifted your underwear to the side and slid in.

“Fucked you a hundred times and you’re still so tight.” He hissed out.

“Feels so good Matt.” You moan as your body curled forward until your forehead met his shoulder.

“I know baby.” He cooed as he began to snap his hips into yours faster. “Gotta be quick, don’t want people to get suspicious do we?” He panted into your ear.

You shook your head and whimpered, your release quickly approaching.

“Ugh, fuck. That’s it, holy shit.” Matt babbled to himself, one hand on your shoulder and the other on the sink, his head flung back in pleasure. “Gonna fucking cum in your perfect pussy.”

Your legs wrapped around his hips, locking him in place as you began to tremble.

“That’s it baby, let it all out.” He grumbled as he pushed you over the edge. Matt’s hips began to stutter as his thrusts became uneven and erratic until he stilled, dick buried to the hilt as he filled you up with his release.

You both sat there catching your breath for a minute, Matt’s dick still wedged in your warm walls. Matt suddenly pulled his now soft dick out of you and grabbed some paper towels to wipe both yours and his cum off of himself. He threw the paper towel out and picked up his boxers and pants, he fastened his belt before turning back to you, still perched on the sink with his thick white release beginning to ooze out of you. Matt walked over, fixed your panties, pulled your skirt back down, and planted a kiss on your cheek.

“Thats my girl.” He smiled before leaving the restroom to return to the table where his family awaited both of your returns.

“Casual my ass.” You scoffed.

[caplanbuckybarnes]

There's Nothing Left of Me (Yet I Still Keep on Giving) (jason todd)

Summary: you beg Jason to let you help him.

Warnings: angst

WC: 626

Read on Ao3!

--

The rain hammered against the windows of Jason's apartment, filling the suffocating silence between you with dread and weariness. The city’s neon glow barely penetrated the gloom, casting faint streaks of red and blue across the walls between the slivers of torn curtains. You stood by the kitchen counter, arms wrapped around yourself as if that could hold you together. Jason was leaning against the couch, his head tilted back, a cigarette dangling forgotten between his fingers, the embers falling pitifully to the ground.

“I didn’t ask you to come here.” His voice was low, hoarse, but it cut through the room like a blade.

You flinched but didn’t move. “I know.”

Jason let out a humorless laugh, the sound grating in your ears. “Then why are you still here?”

You swallowed hard, your nails biting into your arms. “Because someone has to be.”

He stood abruptly, the cigarette falling to the floor as he raked a hand through his damp hair. “I’m not your charity case, Y/N. You don’t need to save me.”

“I’m not trying to save you!” The words came out louder than you intended, your voice breaking under the weight of your emotions. “I just—Jason, I just want to help, please.”

He turned to face you then, his expression a volatile mix of anger and despair. His leather jacket hung off his broad shoulders, worn and frayed like the man himself. “You can’t help me. You don’t get it. There’s nothing left of me. Nothing worth saving., not for a long time now.”

The raw vulnerability in his words made your chest ache. “That’s not true.”

“Yes, it is!” He took a step closer, his fists clenched at his sides. “Every time I try to be better, try to make something out of this mess I’ve become, all I do is hurt the people around me. I have nothing left to give, Y/N. So why the hell are you still here? Why are you wasting your time being here? I don't want the help!”

You hesitated, tears stinging your eyes as you struggled to find the right words. “Because I see you, Jason. I see the man who fights for people who can’t fight for themselves. The man who’s been through hell and still stands, even when it would be easier to give up. You may think there’s nothing left of you, but I see everything you are. And I’m not going anywhere., never. I will never leave your side.”

Jason’s breath hitched, his facade cracking as he stared at you. “You shouldn’t have to do this.”

“Maybe not,” you admitted, stepping closer until you were inches away from him. “But I want to. Because I care about you, Jason. Even when you don’t care about yourself.”

His shoulders slumped, the fight draining out of him as he looked down at you. “I don’t know how to stop falling apart, Y/N.”

You reached out, hesitating for a moment before resting your hand on his cheek. He didn’t pull away, his stormy blue eyes searching yours as if looking for an answer you didn’t have.

“Then let me hold the pieces,” you whispered. “At least until you’re ready to put them back together. I told you, I won't leave you, ever.”

For a long moment, Jason didn’t move. Then, slowly, his arms came up, wrapping around you like a lifeline. He buried his face in your shoulder, his body trembling as the weight he carried finally broke him.

You held him tightly, your fingers threading through his hair as the storm outside raged on. “You don’t have to do this alone, Jason. Not anymore.”

And for the first time in what felt like forever, he let himself believe it.

[dira333]

And the medal goes to... - Present Mic x Reader

for @alienaiver - for the Milestone Event Week 1 - Words: 1,6k

Join My Taglist

This is the best day of his life. 

“You’re annoying,” Shouta tells him from the side, but that’s not breaking his stride, no no.

“You’re just jealous,” Hizashi sings. “Because you didn’t got nominated.”

“I don’t want to be nominated.”

“Who doesn’t want to be nominated?” He turns now, glaring incredulously at his best friend. “It’s a freaking gold medal.”

“It’s not real gold,” Shouta corrects him. “You’re not playing the Olympics. You got gold in the Sports Festival one year, why is this making you so excited?”

“It’s a Medal of Valour, that’s serious business. Valour!!!”

“Yeah, I got it the first time.” Shouta sticks his pinky into his right ear and twists it. “Thanks for bursting my eardrum.”

“I didn’t burst it. I can burst it though if you want me to.”

“Not right now, maybe later.” Shouta parks the car. “Will you be okay without-”

“Don’t you dare stay behind!”

-

It’s a shame he had to come in his hero outfit. 

Sure it looks cool, but the medal will look stupid hanging right over his directional speaker. He could have worn a cool suit, mix up the old-fashioned needle-strip with some leather, spikes or bold colors.

“Oh, Present Mic, Sir, you’re right on time.”

“Of course, it’s such an honor-”

“Right this way, Sir,” he’s cut off, ushered down hallways. “You can wait in here until it’s time to step outside.”

Hizashi blinks. “Am I not supposed to listen to the speeches?”

The girl that had been guiding him looks a little confused.

“I mean, you can listen to them, but your presence is supposed to be a surprise, so you shouldn’t be seen from the crowd.”

“A surprise?” Behind him, Shouta lifts his head. Leave it to him to sniff out something weird.

“I’m sorry, maybe we got this wrong, but isn’t he nominated?”

“Nominated?” The girl stares wide-eyed in surprise. “No! Haven’t you read the letter we sent you?”

Shouta looks at him. He remembers the letter, but not the contents of it. 

Nomination, Medal of Valour, something something.

“Uh…”

“You’re our special guest. You’re here to deliver the Medal.”

“Oh,” Hizashi feels about half his size now. How is he going to explain this to his colleagues tomorrow? They’re all waiting to see that damned medal.

“No harm done,” Shouta calms down the poor girl while he tries to regain his sense of self. “We figured it out in no time. He doesn’t have to do a speech or anything?”

“No, just… be himself and deliver the Medal.”

“I can do that,” Hizashi promises, fumbling with the zipper of his leather jacket. “I can totally do that. I just… I think I got confused, because, why me?”

“I really can’t stay any longer,” the girl excuses herself at that, all but fleeing the scene. So much for an answer.

“Don’t say anything,” he begs Shouta who’s smile is small, but telling. Oh, he’s definitely going to hear about this later.

-

The room is small, but cozy, with a mini-fridge filled with drinks. 

One door leads back to the hallway and the other, Hizashi guesses, leads to the stage.

He pulls it open just a smidge so that he can listen.

The speeches are long and drawn out, as they usually are for an event like this.

Finally, they announce the names of the nominees. 

It’s not a competition, Hizashi knows. Each one of them will be granted their medal.

There’s an older lady who saved a toddler by calling for help. A guy who carried his co-worker out of a burning building. And then there’s you.

Something changes, he’s not sure what it is. Maybe it’s the murmuring crowd or the guy explaining everything or maybe it’s something entirely else, but Hizashi listens carefully now.

You’ve stood up to a Villain, faced injury or worse in order to shield an innocent child.

He knows he’s missing something from the story, but he doesn’t know what.

-

“Why don’t you tell us a little bit about yourself?”

The older lady’s name is Yachi Hitoka. She calls herself a scaredy cat, but knew she needed to do something when the little girl in front of her seemed to have trouble breathing. 

“I don’t have children,” she recalls, “but she held tightly onto my hand as we waited for help to arrive.”

The guy’s name is Tanaka Ryūnosuke and he talks about his deed of heroism like it was nothing but a walk in the park.

“Well I had to carry him out,” he recalls casually. “He couldn’t walk. It wasn’t that bad, just three sets of stairs. And he’s not that heavy, I think everyone could have lifted him-” He hesitates for a second. “Well, anyway, it was a good thing that I prioritize lifting over Cardio.” He chuckles over his own joke.

Finally, it’s your turn.

Your voice is friendly, but there’s an underlying hint of anxiety. No one’s calm on a stage unless they’ve had practice. 

Your name doesn’t ring a bell and neither does your profession but your story touches him differently than the others.

“I just had to help,” you say, voice tight. “Just because they’re quirkless doesn’t mean they can be treated that way! And what kind of person would I be, just looking the other way?”

“What gave you the strength to stand up to this Villain? I’m sure it wasn’t easy.”

“No,” you laugh. “But I thought about my favorite Hero. And that helped me a lot.”

“Oh, you’ve mentioned him before. What’s his name again, so that we all now?”

Your voice turns lower, as if you’re flustered.

“It’s, uh, it’s Present Mic. I’ve looked up to him since he’s had his debut.”

Shouta’s elbow digs deep into his ribs at that. Hizashi had forgotten about his best friend’s presence until that moment and he curses quietly under his breath.

Behind him, a door opens. 

“Are you ready?” The girl from earlier asks and he turns to nod at her before facing the stage again, peeking through the open door at the thick curtain he has to step through in a moment.

- - - x - - -

It’s hard to focus with the bright lights all around you, your sweaty hands leaving damp marks on your arm rests and all those faces looking up at you.

Medal of Valour. Hah. You didn’t do it for a Medal.

You did it for yourself, growing up Quirkless. For all the looks and the rumours and the loneliness.

You did it, because you knew, if he had been there, Present Mic would have done it too. 

At least you like to believe that.

“We were touched by your story,” the interviewer says now. “So we brought in an extra Guest today. Someone special to deliver the Medals.”

You swallow, unsure how to react.

Movement on your right has you shift your head and you glare into the bright light, trying to figure out what’s happening.

The curtains lift and you see something, someone, stepping through. Black leather, bight blond hair - you let out a weird sound that’s neither here nor there.

Present Mic is taller than you imagined him. 

He’s staring at you like he’s not quite sure what he’s seeing and you wonder if he noticed the cane crammed between your thigh and armrest or the dark shadows under your eyes that come from the anemia.

Present Mic opens his mouth. You think you’re prepared for his voice but you’re not. Or rather, you’re not prepared for his words.

“You’re pretty!”

He says it like he’s dazed, like one does after getting hit in the head.

Snickers are heard from the crowd and he snaps out of it, blushing a feverish red.

“Pretty brave,” he corrects himself and you choke out a nervous giggle, try to avert your eyes and find you can’t. “Pretty brave indeed. I heard all of your stories. That’s what heroism is about, right? To help when needed, even when it’s hard.”

He blunders on, puts one word after the other until he’s got a sentence and then another but his eyes don’t seem to leave you.

It’s crazy and strange and you’re probably imagining things - yeah, that must be it - but he’s suddenly right in front of you, handing you that medal you never thought you could want, his hands lingering on yours a little longer than necessary.

You watch him move on. Tanaka-san next to you claps Present Mic on the shoulder like they’re old friends. Yachi-san giggles like a schoolgirl in love when he compliments her up-do, not once mentioning the obvious grey.

It’s over too soon. You’re meant to leave the stage under the applause of a crowd but you can’t walk that fast and the applause ebbs away as you fight your way down the stairs, your hand gripping your cane shaking.

It’s the nerves, really, but you know how it looks like.

“Care to hold on to my arm?” Present Mic’s on your other side all of a sudden, his arm right where you need it.

You hold onto it, flustered when he puts his hand right over yours, warm and reassuring.

“Can’t let you get away from me before I have your number,” he mumbles but he’s not good at speaking quietly, it seems and heads turn.

You don’t care for them. 

You only care for the mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

“Well I could give it to you,” you tell him, a little braver now that you’re on solid ground, the crowd dispersing around you. “After all, you’ve been brave enough to ask.”

“Mhm,” he nods, smirking. “Brave enough to get a Medal of Valour?”

“Let’s not get too hasty,” you play along. “Start with my number first.”

“And a date second...”

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