#maybe i am a better person for it but dont compliment me by implying i have some inherent gift from a god i dont even believe in

[seth-shitposts]

"Next time they make a move, we'll be waiting for them to snuff out that spark before it catches fire."

-Kallus [s1e1]

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"I never asked questions."

"Well maybe you should start. Or are you afraid of the answers you'll get?"

-Kallus & Zeb [s2e17]

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"You have the heart of a rebel."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

-Thrawn & Kallus [s3e21]

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"You disgust me, traitor."

"The day I betrayed your empire, Governor, is the day I finally stopped betraying myself."

-Pryce & Kallus [s4e15]

---

Alex: I'm dumping a theory essay / speculative thoughts here, and I am solely pulling from my memory which isn't always 100% accurate, but here's some of my thoughts on aspects of Alexsandr Kallus’s core character. (This is just what I think, of course, don't take it as facts. I'm literally just dumping words. And parts of this is strongly headcanon, as we dont have much canonically for his backstory.)

I believe that Kallus has always had "the heart of a rebel".

I believe that he's always had a strong sense of justice and values. Or maybe one that he built from scrap himself and with the resources available to him. (And, of course, just because one has a strong sense of justice, does not make that person automatically correct.)

He himself has said and believed [back before he searched for answers and became disillusioned from the empire] that the empire brought about justice and order to the galaxy. That's what he believed he had been supporting, it's what he was placing his loyalty into.

I feel that Kallus may have always had a twinge here or there, a feeling that something was off or a seed of doubt. But it was always just small and it would have been easier to push it aside and let himself believe that somethings cannot be helped, that sometimes the ends justify the means. This is what he would have been taught in his IBS training, given the nature of his job.

If Kallus was indeed from the lower levels, then he would have been witness to not only disorder and wrong doings on a daily basis, but also higher levels of violence as well. So when the empire did recruitments with promises of what would have allured the citizens of the lower levels to join the academy, it would have been in character for Kallus to have joined at the chance to bring change for the better to the galaxy, to places similar to where he came from.

And the contrast between the lower levels and the academy would have been a huge culture shock, one that would have taken some getting used to. So he probably started right off the bat with observing, trying to figure it out. And then there would be minor things here and there that he may have felt somewhere was off. Maybe he even questioned it, but would immediately shut the train of thought down if it were even implied that he was being disloyal or didn't have faith in the system.

And even of it felt wrong to him to do some of these things, that it was causing internal conflict, he would snuff out the doubt, extinguish the questions, because there was a goal that needed to be met. Even if he found something distasteful, he would ignore it until eventually he didn't feel that recoil anymore. Because he believed that the empire was right, that if he tried hard enough, he would accomplish what he had set out to do. And over time, he snuffed out that spark. And the fact that he had lost those who were close to him, all in one fell swoop on what was supposed to be just a routine mission probably made it easier to dedicate himself to a system that made promises of justice and order. So he probably really should stop questioning things, it would've been in his best interest.

Over the years, it would have been a slow progression of the Empire's tactics becoming more and more extreme, just enough small changes building up so that it would have seemed that increasing the iron grip was the best course of action. It produced the best results, the Empire would have become more powerful, and therefore allowed the empire to expand its reach even further and cover more ground. Stopping rebellions at the roots, ending a small spark before it has the chance to burn down a house. And maybe in this twisted perception, Kallus would have thought that the way to make sure another massacre like what happened on Lasan didn't happen again would've been to do this. To snuff our sparks before they become so big that the Empire's only response is to end the whole situation through brute force and overpowering numbers. There was most probably a part of Kallus that knew something about what had happened to Lasan was wrong, but he chose to override that and continue on the mission.

Despite how hard he had been throwing himself into walls to capture the ghost crew and to "finish what he started" there was still that something there, as it would have brought him to feel the need to say something about it to Zeb on the moon. About how it wasn't supposed to be a massacre, but he realized the empire wanted to make an example. Part of him would have had to of known that it was wring on some level, but he still chose to snuff out the doubt. Because the doubt would only lead to the need to ask questions and asking questions would only lead to being accused of disloyalty and doubt in the entire empire itself.

But then came the point in Legends of the Lasat when Kallus had to face the realization that no matter what he did, he wasn't going to catch the rebels, he wasn't going to catch the ghost crew. He had been chasing this group for well over a year at this point and every time they still managed to evade capture, to escape, to survive, to live. They will only ever remain out of reach, even when he throws caution to the wind. In that moment, something deep in him knows that it's not going to happen. It doesn't stop him from trying again, but there's that little seed that remains.

And then Zeb tells Kallus that maybe he should ask questions. Or is he afraid that he'll find the answers and not like the harsh truth? To have to face the fact that for nearly two decades he had been devoting himself to a system that has only been oppressing the galaxy, that he had been betraying his own morals and values for false promises.

Zeb saying that to Kallus would have dragged back every bit of doubt, every question buried alive. It re-lit a spark. So Kallus took the borrowed courage, because stars knows that he had been too much of a coward to do it himself up to this point, and chased down some answers. And those answers we his worst fears confirmed, that he had betrayed the fibers of his own being and committed terrible acts for lies. And rather than run or slip into despair, Kallus immediately took to following what he thinks is right. The best way to help others is to do what he can to help the rebellion.

And he doesn't change allegiances for anyone but himself. Because it's what he believes to be the right thing to do, and it is. Finally having forced himself to swallow his pride he looked to the whole truth for what it was. And even though he may not have liked what he saw, he still had to face it and do the next right thing.

And even though there was the pain and guilt of the fact that he had done what he did, there may have also been this sense of relief. While it was still suffocating to have learned the truth, there was a part of him that was finally allowed to breathe again. A part of him that came back full force.

[megashadowdragon]

The Legend of Korra: Makorra is better than K*rrasami!?! My honest thoughts on this debate!!!

comments on  youtube

I’m not at all against LGBT representation; but I care a lot about how it’s written or introduced. Korrasami just did not feel natural. If anything it just felt like they were becoming better and closer friends. Whereas Makorra, I’ll admit had some problems and a break up was necessary, went through a great deal of change and growth. And they absolutely deserved another chance at love with each otherShow less I feel the same way it's like korra and asami are just like good besties or really close friends I mean yes their both independent and good but there's no spark in their love or relationship as no one even thought of that or is unexpected I always thought korra will end up with mako til the end but yeah the love triangle or mako's confusion and Kora's responsibility both get on the way but am still hoping maybe they might workout since everyone can change by timeShow less

Bro I wish there was a way we could form a makorra community to retcon the comics and make a different storyline after season 4.Korrasami just feels unnatural.Hopefully once shity Covids over someone has the brains to do it same as a lot of people have done like fan films for star wars sequels and stuff

Thank you for this, but nowadays we can't even say we don't like Korrasami or criticize how poorly it is made without being called homophobic

on the blush part and how you brought up how toph  blushed at a compliment from someone she had no romantic feelings toward I also have to point out that korra blushed at bolins compliment as well and its been shown that she had no romantic feelings for bolin ( also in b1 bryke referred to korra and mako as soulmates)

in remembrances in b4 mako got a whole speech about what korra meant to him as a person ( while in that ep asami only brought up korra the avatar ( going of course we need you youre the avatar )  and korras problem was focusing on korra the avatar not as a person asami failed in helping her she misunderstood what korra needed  (  while tenzin succeded by bringing up korra as a person and makos speech makes me think if mako was there instead of asami mako would have understood what korra needed)  which is why I dont see korra and asami scene in b4 as evidence for korrasami

it makes it clear to me bryke just threw in korrasami at the last minute they outright admitted that when they wrote the finale they had thought about how they didnt involve representation  and went to the execs to see if they can do it ) it says to me that they didnt build up to korrasami and just threw it in at the last minute and then proceeded to try and cover their asses  by pretending it was planned 

( heck in the finale when jinora said they couldnt find her the camera focused on makos face not asamis camera zooms and music swells signify importance so makos reaction  was given importance over asamis

(mako and korra  had   mutual flaws that broke them up in b2 and had overcame those flaws  and proceeded to  reconnect and support each other on good terms

this is a story in the end good writing is more important  then whether a ships representation or not   korrasami was just thrown in at the last minute it had no buildup its not good writing to make it happen while its rep making korrasami happen is just bad writing thus it shouldnt have happened ( not to mention korra going on vacation is ooc of her ) 

in my eyes if they really were concerned about rep they should have said to themselves in the next series we make we will include lgbt rep with a mc and have hints to kya being lgbt in finale or  or imply asami is bi but not having her get together with korra) 

“ reunion strongly implied that Korra wrote only the one letter, and giving Korra more direct interactions with Mako than Asami.“

ikkinthekitsune . tumblr . com/post/116230735171/im-really-tired-of-this-of-korrasami-was-subtle#notes

I'm really tired of this of Korrasami was subtle nonsense from Korrasami shippers for 2 reasons. 1 Subtle means non existent all these people have is a letter and a blush really Makorra has whole episodes like The Revelation and Beyond the Wilds, and a 11 minute segment in Remembrances. 2 Korra is not a subtle person when she wants something/someone she goes hard at the goal like in Book she was not subtle at all in regards to wanting Mako as you and many others have pointed out

The trick with being subtle is that subtle needs to exist in an environment quiet enough not to drown it.  If implications that the writers didn’t intend are louder than the ones that they did intend (as is the case of both Beyond the Wilds and Remembrances), there’s a serious problem.

And, yeah, Korra is absolutely the wrong person to characterize with romantic subtlety.  Korra’s as subtle as a jackhammer, and it’s entirely fair for the audience to expect her to continue to be that way.

heck the blush isnt evidence for romantic attraction for korra for she blushed after asami complimented her ( when korra was feeling down) the same thing happened in spirits of competition with bolin who she clearly showed she wasnt into romantically

instead have korra with mako and talk about how much work they have to do ( possibly a hint or 2 of them getting back together 

( I have to add that in the 

and on the censorship claim

"Censorship explains why we couldn’t get a kiss and an “I love you” in the finale or blatant romantic scenes, not the utter lack of Korra-Asami interaction as a whole. They had six (to six and a half) minutes of interaction in the last season, spread out over six interactions/conversations. They’ve had nearly no on-screen interaction since “Long Live the Queen,” actually. They had the 5 second “I can come to the South Pole” convo in “Korra Alone” (which Korra refused), the single letter, their interactions in “Reunions,” and then the tea scene in “Remembrances.” After that, they don’t speak again until the last two minutes of the finale. The episode after “Remembrances” is the Korra-Mako field trip to the Spirit Wilds and Zaheer’s prison and the culmination of Korra’s recovery arc. Where was Asami? She had two lines in the whole episode, and they were both to Varrick."

and bryke only thought of korrasami at the last minute when they were making the finale and  admitted that whenhe went to  the executives to ask if they could do it  it was the finale of book 4 was already being made ( paraphrased ) he out right talked about how he thought to himself  about how they didnt include any lgbt rep and when they were making the finale he went to the executives to see if they could do it ( it was only at  the last minute that he even asked and how he worded it  combined with the nonexistent buildup ( it wasnt subtle it was nonexistent )  adds to my belief that  he only thought about korrasami being a thing at the last minute andd threw it in at the last minutes in an ooc scene   as a publicity stunt they did korrasami because it was popular

mako showed he could support korra the way she needed to be supported in the field trip episode while asami showed she couldnt in remembrances where she went you are the avatar we need you then tenzin came in and succeded to help korra by bringing up how she grew as a person

 korra thinking of korraas the avatar and centering her identity on that was her whole issue

mako was the only

 ( it would have been better if instead of making a  last minute retcon either have it implied asami crushing on korra but not having korra reciprocate  or having kya imply she has a girlfriend  ( with korra talking with the krew  about how there is a lot of work to do  ( with possible makorra hints ) 

  asami doesnt seem to really get korra she seems to treat Korra as a lot more fragile and needy than Korra really is in a way that Korra doesn’t ever seem to appreciate.

the aspersions Bryan cast on the fandom for not accepting what amounted to a last-minute retcon have been functioning (whether intentionally or not) to shield the creators from any criticism for their own fault in the poor execution of their endgame ship, allowing them to take all of the credit for being “subversive” and none of the blame for breaking their existing narrative to do it.

bryke admitted they only asked if they could do it

when they were making the finale and they claimed  that it was brought up by a realization they didnt include any rep ( whether thats true or its just a publicity stunt doesnt matter korrasami being the first only same sex pairing in avatar series doesnt matter it being the first same sex pairing with a main protagonist  in cartoons doesnt matter . it doesnt matter that korrasami was the only same sex pairing in lok ( that without it lok would have no lgbt rep ( it would be no diffferent from atla  in that regard and good writing is more important then filling a quota ) 

 it  shouldnt have been done good writing is more important then that  throwing in a ship as a last minute retcon is just bad writing  I  would say if they were really concerned about that rather than break narrative an act of bad writing  make a side character lgbt or imply asami is bi 

(  just make it happen with main character in a next series they make it wouldnt ahve  the same impact but it would be better  then a last minute retcon with no buildup   and breaking the narrative which pointed to makorra getting backtogether ( who overcome the mutual flaws that led to the breakup ( and got along well ( neither of them would have worked with anyone in b2

given korras canonical personality  along with asamis  and how their needs  Icant imagine korrasami working (and they had to change korras canonical personality to try and get it to work )

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105933518980

And yet they had almost no interaction after “Long Live the Queen.“

Let’s count ‘em out, shall we?

The "I’ll watch over her as she meditates” scene in “The Ultimatum” (which, though people may look at it as romantic, is honestly horribly practical considering Mako and Bolin had their entire family that needed to be relocated and resettled at the time)

The hug in “Enter the Void” (of which Mako got one too–and who got the close-up and the music swell? It wasn’t the Korra-Asami hug)

The ‘I’m here to talk if you need me’ scene in “Venom of the Red Lotus” (which at that point could have easily been interpreted as a scene between two friends/a supportive and compassionate friend, and which was very in character for Asami as a whole)

Asami’s offer to go to the South Pole with Korra in “Korra Alone” (which Korra refused)

Korra’s single letter to Asami (which is also ambiguous; you could read it as romantic or you could read it as “who else is she gonna reply to? Her ex-boyfriend, who she’s still awkward with, or Bolin, who bless him, truly cares, but is naive and isn’t really all that serious and besides that is currently working for the woman taking what Korra views as "her job”)

Their interactions in “Reunions” (which focused equally on her reunion with Mako and the Wu drama)(four interactions, two of which were directly related to the Wu drama and the other two on Korra’s leave of absence/silence)

The tea scene in “Remembrances” (during which Asami said nothing to Korra that Tenzin didn’t echo and that Mako, Tenzin, and Bolin hadn’t said to Korra before)

The last minutes of the finale

So over the course of the 14 episodes of Book 4, we have a grand total of five interactions between Korra and Asami, only 1 of which can be nonambiguously interpreted as romantic ( ( altered by me ) the finale conversation). Meanwhile Mako and Korra get an entire episode dedicated to finishing Korra’s recovery arc and their friendship/relationship? And Mako is there to support Korra during the culmination of her recovery arc, not Asami, the person Bryke is attempting to write in a potential future romantic relationship with Korra? And Mako is the one who Bryke basically explicitly states within canon as being still deeply in love with Korra and being inspired by her (several times), while Asami never gets a word in about how she feels about Korra until those last five minutes? And Mako is the one who the “camera” focuses on when Jinora says she can’t find Korra in the finale, not Asami? And a dozen other things? Lol, seems unevenly balanced to me.

The only member of the core Krew Korra had less interaction this season with was Bolin, with whom she only got one direct conversation the entire season (“Beyond the Wilds”).

Like…say what you want, but that’s very poor relationship development. It’s poor FRIENDSHIP development too (like god, poor Bolin; he was her first friend, too). Bryke dropped the ball on interpersonal relationship development within the Krew this season. Like hell, I expected Korra to remain single and I still think there was a far bigger case for the rebuilding of the Makorra relationship at this point (as presented within canon) than there was for the building of a Korrasami relationship.

the problem with book 2 makorra wasnt that there was conflict it was the way they handled that conflict and they fixed that issue by b4  makorra wasnt a terrible relationship

korra wouldnt have worked with anyone in book 2 

arguing isnt inherently unhealthy (

I view korrasami as a last minute retcon ( they admitted they thought of korrasami around the time finale was being made an thats when they went to the executive to ask if they could do it

They admitted they didn’t approach the network until the finale was underway, they edited it in in retakes, and (I’ve heard but I can’t confirm) called the voice actresses in in secret to record their final dialogue.

before the last couple of minutes there was nothing that hinted at korrasami being more then platonic fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105951907185

 ikkinthekitsune . tumblr . com/post/122633714360/why-would-korrasami-not-last 

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/112100564400

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105933518980

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/106480044135/hanyojai-fantastic-nonsense-some-korrasami

(all from “The Southern Lights”–thanks to forevergirlkorra)

During the pictured hug: “You never cease to amaze me.”

Korra: “Thanks. By the way, I’m really sorry for being a total pain. Things were really stressful and pretty confusing. It’s hard being the Avatar.”

Mako: “[Jokingly] It’s harder being the Avatar’s boyfriend. [Nudges Korra before they hug.]

What do all of these arguments have in comment? Oh wait…Korra picking fights and trying to force Mako to “pick sides” (which side is never clear). What else do all these arguments have in common? Oh right…Mako attempting to be a supportive, loving boyfriend while attempting to do his job.

And the big one that you seem to be focusing on.

For context, this is immediately after Mako’s found out that Korra is basically planning insurrection and hauling off sections of the United Forces (commanded by General Iroh) against the will of Raiko and Republic City. Aka, doing it her way instead of trying to understand Raiko’s point of view (and I hate him, hate him hate him hate him, but I still understand what he was doing and why he was doing it when he refused her plea for troops) and actually trying to promote peace. Korra was emotionally compromised and under incredible stress the entire season. Mako attempted to be supportive and loving and continued to do so until Korra’s actions interfered with his ability to do his job to the fullest extent and interfered with his ability to follow the law. Yes; he chose following the law over letting his girlfriend wander off with a section of the United Republic’s army. That’s not choosing Korra over his job. That’s Korra blatantly interfering with his ability to do his job truthfully and faithfully.

As Raiko said: “Your activities here are bordering on insurrection. The Avatar does not command the military of the Republic. Don’t go behind my back again.”

Korra has no right to command the Republic’s military. It’s not under her authority, and it’s not her decision. And instead of taking no for an answer, Korra thought she could just go behind Raiko’s back and wander off with them anyway. Honestly, the best thing Mako did in this situation was inform Raiko about the situation.

And the kicker: the breakup. 

Let’s see what’s going on, yeah? Mako is trying to figure out who bombed the Southern Tribe Cultural Center, trying to do his normal job as a cop, and trying to keep his girlfriend from committing treason and insurrection because she thinks an army is the best way to solve the Water Tribe Civil War. Korra is under incredible stress, dealing with the Water Tribe Civil War, her home being invaded, her parents imprisoned or hurt, and Raiko’s apparent callousness to the whole situation. NO relationship could thrive under these conditions, even the strongest one. You are repeatedly ignoring the CONTEXT of the situation in which they broke up. Mako repeatedly tried to help and be supportive, and Korra repeatedly rebuffed him and picked fights. Though they were both to blame (for varying reasons), the fault for the disintegration of their relationship lies mainly at Korra’s feet and the feet of outside influences/events.

And alright…let’s get some things straight on the whole Makorrasami drama in the back half of Book 2.

Good, I’m glad you admit that Asami kissed him. That’s half the battle with some people. Now we get to examine Asami'smutual complicity and responsibility in the creation and mishandling of the Makorrasami drama instead of blaming it all on Mako.

So. “The Sting.” Mako, seeing that Asami’s in trouble, organizes an unofficial sting operation, culminating in a double cross that leaves Asami’s last warehouse empty. The following exchange happens:

Asami: [Defeated.] Just stop. It’s over. I give up.

Mako: Well, I’m not giving up on you.

Asami: [She kisses Mako.] Sorry, I-

Mako: Uh … It’s-it’s okay. Um … anyway … I gotta run. I’m gonna find out who did this. And I know just who to ask.

Now, this was not technically in the wrong, as both of them are single, but it was still a dick move. Asami is well aware that Mako and Korra just broke up, and yet she seems to give no thought to the implications of getting back together with Mako, especially the implications for her friendship with Korra. Not to mention the fact that she seems to give no thought to Mako’s feelings or emotions and what he’s going through in the aftermath of the breakup. It’s honestly a bit out of character for Asami, though it’s probably explained by her own personal emotional vulnerability at the time, considering she had basically just lost everything.

Now, anyway, fast forward through Wan’s story to “The Guide.”

Asami: [To Mako.] “Sounds like you’ve had a pretty busy week.” [Puts her hand on his chest.] “Maybe you just need to relax.”

Bolin[Pensively.] “Wait a minute. Are you two— ”[Mako and Asami look back at him before he gasps and points his finger toward them.] “you’re dating again? What?”

Mako:“Dating? No!”

Asami: “That’s crazy!”

Bolin: “Korra just left a week ago!”

Mako: [Cut to aerial view.] “Guys, listen to me. Varrick is up to no good, and I have proof.”

It’s left up in the air as to whether or not they’re actually dating. Both say they aren’t, but it comes off as kind of a ‘yeah but we’re not going to admit it.’ We get one more kiss and the sort of hint of a possible date. “Remembrances” points out that the relationship was not official, and that neither him nor Asami had actually worked out whether they were dating again (when I was watching, I was trying to figure out if they were actually dating or if it was a friend with benefits relationship+emotional baggage). Bolin assumes they are (and brings up Asami as “kinda started dating” in “Harmonic Convergence”), but we never get a clear picture about what’s going on there. Anyway, immediately after this, Mako is arrested, Asami seemingly abandons him, claiming that it’s “too painful to see him in prison because it reminds her of her father.”

And then Korra comes back and we get that whole clusterfuck. Yes, Mako screwed up. Yes, it was wrong. And yes, he was called out for it and faced the consequences of his actions. Mako clearly felt guilty about doing it as soon as it happened; we see him attempt  at least twice to tell Korra about their situation during the course of the next two episodes (pre-Harmonic Convergence stuff going down), only to stop because a) he’s terrified of her reaction (rightly so considering her reaction to their first breakup and the initial situation in which he was going to tell her about it) b) he doesn’t want to hurt her even more (she did run off crying in “Peacekeepers,” and he does love her) and c) in his own words, “I guess I wanted to pretend that the breakup never happened.” C is the least acceptable reasoning for not telling, but they’re all pretty horrible excuses.

….and yet Asami never said anything. We get like what? The two shots of her looking at him in annoyance and betrayal? But she never says anything about it, either to Mako or Korra. Why not? She’s had no problem calling Mako out before in regards to their relationship (“Turning the Tides”). Why does she stay silent?

So yes, he took advantage of the situation presented to him. Yes, this was a dick move, and something that he should be called out for (and was). Was it cheating? Possibly. It could go either way. If it was, Bryke made practically no effort to show and define it as such. Mako is only responsible for the mishandling of the fallout. Let’s not forget that the consequences of him doing this was a “real” breakup with Korra in “Light in the Dark” and lingering awkwardness around Korra and Asami the first half of the third season. Not to mention the fandom’s everlasting hatred. Mako was not rewarded for his actions; far from it.

Mako’s character is centered on protecting people and being in control of his life, both of which stem from his childhood and adolescence on the streets and basically becoming a father to Bolin at the age of eight. This leads to some poor handling of his interpersonal relationships due to him a) not having had any before and b) wanting to not hurt those he cares about. As Tu said in “Remembrances,”“You know, it seems like you’re so afraid to disappoint anyone that you end up disappointing everyone.”

The other ironic thing is that you are passionately arguing against why Makorra doesn’t work, ignoring the immense growth both characters experienced in Books 3 and 4 that would make it so that they would work. People always point out “they didn’t work,” not recognizing that it was outside pressures that was the catalyst for their breakup (as far as we know, they had a happy, healthy, functioning relationship for the entire six-month gap; we don’t get to see that portion, as Book 2 starts up with the tension already brewing) and that it was their mutual immaturity, conflicting responsibilities, and an inability to apologize that led to their breakup. ALL THINGS THAT HAVE CHANGED SINCE BOOK 2. Korrasami shippers neglect and refuse to recognize the growth of Korra and Mako since Book 2 that lead to their ability to have a functioning relationship post-Book 4.

Both Korra and Mako have had independent character development over the course of Books 3 and 4 that essentially solve the issues that drove them apart in Book 2. Both learned how to juggle their own personal emotional issues with their jobs, both grew up and matured, Mako learned how to handle his interpersonal relationships with people better, Korra’s emotional arc progressed immensely and cooled her naivety and hotheadedness down quite a bit, Korra (largely) has stopped defining herself by her role as the Avatar (and thus basing her self-worth solely on that identity and her capacity to perform it), they learned how to apologize to each other when they argued (something showcased in “Reunion” and something rather lacking in their relationship during Book 2)…they basically grew up, and it did WONDERS for any relationship they might have post-Book 4, whether that relationship be platonic or romantic. However, you saying that Korra and Mako didn’t work and so can’t work ignores the immense growth both characters have experienced since their breakup that affect how they would treat their relationship and how well it would work out.

Alright. Since this post is already getting WAY too long, I’m going to point you here (fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/106434942870/korra-mako-interactions-vs-korra-asami), here( fantastic-nonsense . tumblr .  com/post/106208675325/littlekorrasamithings-everyone-saying-korrasami), here (fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105951907185/whats-so-frustrating-about-all-the-complaints), here(fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/178468915315/how-mako-talks-about-korra-vs-how-asami-talks/embed), here ( fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105945181530/queensolverson-answered-your-post) , here (fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105843268765/i-think-its-funny-that-you-say-korrasami-is), and here (fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/106044561415/commissionergorgon-commissionergorgon) for why I think Asami and Korra got way less development. Short answer: they got less screentime, less interaction, less relationship buildup, and less depth, not to mention blatant OOCness on both their parts during the finale scene.

And just for kicks, because you brought up the blush:

“Are you kidding me? You’re the smartest, funniest, toughest, buffest, talentedest, incrediblest girl in the world!” [Korra laughs] “You really feel that way about me?”

[The Borra ship went on to sink coldly and cruelly halfway through this episode and never resurfaced]

Now why do you think there were issues interpeting the blush as romantic (even though that’s one of the three non-ambiguous romantic scenes I actually counted in my tally up)? Gee, I wonder if it’s beacause Korra has been shown blushing at compliments others give her before (whether her feelings towards those people are romantic or platonic) and blushing in embarrassment. Not to mention the fact that Korra had been very self-conscious about herself all season. The fact is: that scene was ambiguous and could have been interpreted any number of ways. That’s the problem. You CAN see it as romantic, but it’s extremely easy not to.

And if that’s the only moment you can drag up hun, you’ve got a long way to go. I’ve been debating this all week and literally tallied up the total interaction Korra and Asami had and the total interaction Korra and Mako had in the last two seasons. Fact remains: Korra and Asami had very little on-screen interaction compared to Korra and just about everyone else, and Korra and Mako got nearly twice the interactions and nearly triple the screentime in Book 4 as Korra and Asami. You’re going to have to try way harder.

scoroseposts-deactivated2015062 asked: I think people who don’t understand why it is that some of us queer, not, whomever, have legitimate concerns with K/orrasami, is because they’re associated our concerns with the ship itself, as in the possibility of romance between Korra and Asami, or a romance between two woman. That however is simply not the case. It isn’t a possible romance between KA or the fact that it’s between two women; it’s the way it was PORTRAYED in canon that’s the issue. KA is a valid ship, that much is not and has

never been contested by the people who I’ve come across in this fandom who take issue with the way the ship was portrayed. Had things gone differently, or had there been a 5th book titled rebirth where we see more in depth how the three years changed the characters, saw Korra come to a better sense of healing and completion, and dealt with the aftermath of war WITH Kuvira in a legitimate way, and we saw KA become closer romantically, then the romance would have been supported in canon in a much

more holistic and equal way. Instead, we have back pedaling, inconsistent characterization, and a unneeded vacation that I honestly don’t know would have been beneficial for either Korra OR Asami, Korra more specifically because even though she has learned that the Avatar need not be alone, she still is the Avatar and wants to fulfil her duties to the best of her abilities. And it just isn’t in Korra’s characterization, even three years later, to walk away from a problem when she knows she can

help. Hence 99.9% of the reasons why the people who do not like the ending or the ship, take issue with it becoming canonized. Not because it became canon or because it was between KA, but BECAUSE IT WAS PORTRAYED IN A WAY THAT WAS CHARACTER INCONSISTENT AND THROWN TOGETHER IN THE LAST TWO MINUTES. Please feel free to add anything I missed in my frustrated rant. You seem to be one of the few who genuinely understands my issues with the way some of B4 played out.

I guess what I would add is this – one of the reasons the people who liked Book 1/Book 2 Korra are so staunchly against KA is that the ship itself requires undesirable changes to Korra’s characterization to operate.

The change you suggested – add a fifth Book showing how the characters were changed in greater depth – wouldn’t have changed the fact that a Korra who was portrayed as interested in such a relationship would have looked very little like the character we loved in the first two Books.  It’d make for a more consistent story, but that wouldn’t make the change of direction any less palatable (in fact, I’m much happier with things the way, actually, because at least now it’s not difficult to amputate the parts that mess up Korra’s characterization).

In other words, the issue isn’t that the writers didn’t support the ship enough (though it’s pretty clear that they didn’t) – the issue is that the writers chose two of the worst characters to throw together in the first place.  Korra can’t fill the role they tried to have her fill while still being Korra (since she’s far too open about her affection to pull off plausible deniability).  Asami isn’t the sort of character Korra can even be herself around.  They needed different characters more than better writing… and that has nothing to do with both of them being female and everything to do with who they each are as individuals.

source: ikkinthekitsune . tumblr . com/post/122083298390/i-think-people-who-dont-understand-why-it-is-that#notes

1) the breakup??? that bryke was ‘very specific about’ that they had to lean into it and kiss and walk away still clinging to each others hands?? and honestly i’ve never heard of or seen a breakup in which they kiss to end it.

2) the hugs/meaningful glances in book 3?

and what even was that look from korra to Mako after she hugged him??/

that special moment they shared?

the camera zooming in on their hug when they reunited

and when korra was leaving to go fight zaheer- that fuckn music?? what was that supposed to mean then (which brings me to my next point)

3) why did makorra have a music theme that they continued to use even after they broke up?? kataang had a music theme. zutara did not. what am I supposed to think about this??

4) What was the purpose of dedicating almost half an episode to the rocky road of Makorra in Remembrances? If it was just meant to be closure they could have made it a lot shorter and put more emphasis on Korra’s journey or on Varrick’s mover

and on that note why would they feel the need to add that mako hasn’t dated anyone since he and korra broke up??

5) What was the purpose of the Makorra field trip in book 4? Mako didn’t really need to be there technically, it could have been any one of the gazillion friends Korra has. The writers chose him to accompany Korra on one of her most important journeys. And that look he gave her as she went to meet Zaheer- ????

6) This could be put up to interpretation but the generally accepted fact that Mako’s still into her was not resolved?? like at all, they didn’t ever really talk properly about their breakup

And yet they had almost no interaction after “Long Live the Queen.“

Let’s count ‘em out, shall we?

The "I’ll watch over her as she meditates” scene in “The Ultimatum” (which, though people may look at it as romantic, is honestly horribly practical considering Mako and Bolin had their entire family that needed to be relocated and resettled at the time) The hug in “Enter the Void” (of which Mako got one too–and who got the close-up and the music swell? It wasn’t the Korra-Asami hug) The ‘I’m here to talk if you need me’ scene in “Venom of the Red Lotus” (which at that point could have easily been interpreted as a scene between two friends/a supportive and compassionate friend, and which was very in character for Asami as a whole) Asami’s offer to go to the South Pole with Korra in “Korra Alone” (which Korra refused) Korra’s single letter to Asami (which is also ambiguous; you could read it as romantic or you could read it as “who else is she gonna reply to? Her ex-boyfriend, who she’s still awkward with, or Bolin, who bless him, truly cares, but is naive and isn’t really all that serious and besides that is currently working for the woman taking what Korra views as "her job”) Their interactions in “Reunions” (which focused equally on her reunion with Mako and the Wu drama)(four interactions, two of which were directly related to the Wu drama and the other two on Korra’s leave of absence/silence) The tea scene in “Remembrances” (during which Asami said nothing to Korra that Tenzin didn’t echo and that Mako, Tenzin, and Bolin hadn’t said to Korra before) The last minutes of the finale So over the course of the 14 episodes of Book 4, we have a grand total of five interactions between Korra and Asami, only two of which can be nonambiguously interpreted as romantic (the blush in “Reunions,” which honestly I hestitate to count as nonambiguous, but I’ll give it to you, and the finale conversation). Meanwhile Mako and Korra get an entire episode dedicated to finishing Korra’s recovery arc and their friendship/relationship? And Mako is there to support Korra during the culmination of her recovery arc, not Asami, the person Bryke is attempting to write in a potential future romantic relationship with Korra? And Mako is the one who Bryke basically explicitly states within canon as being still deeply in love with Korra and being inspired by her (several times), while Asami never gets a word in about how she feels about Korra until those last five minutes? And Mako is the one who the “camera” focuses on when Jinora says she can’t find Korra in the finale, not Asami? And a dozen other things? Lol, seems unevenly balanced to me.

The only member of the core Krew Korra had less interaction this season with was Bolin, with whom she only got one direct coversation the entire season (“Beyond the Wilds”).

Like…say what you want, but that’s very poor relationship development. It’s poor FRIENDSHIP development too (like god, poor Bolin; he was her first friend, too). Bryke dropped the ball on interpersonal relationship development within the Krew this season. Like hell, I expected Korra to remain single and I still think there was a far bigger case for the rebuilding of the Makorra relationship at this point (as presented within canon) than there was for the building of a Korrasami relationship.

peteseeger . tumblr . com/post/109172869648/2-seasons-vs-12-episodes-is-such-a-bullshit

“2 seasons vs 12 episodes” is such a bullshit argument

it doesn’t matter how many episodes there were. what matters is the narrative and plot focus given to developing the relationship.

here are the book 1 episodes that i can definitely state possessed subplots or important storyline beats in building korra and mako’s romantic interest and development:

A Leaf in the Wind The Revelation The Spirit of Competition Out of the Past Skeletons in the Closet Endgame

there is no ambiguity in these examples. a layman could clearly tell from watching these episodes, without the aid of shipping goggles or a shipper’s mindset, that the writing on the wall is “korra and mako will become a couple.”

now, here are the episodes that i can definitely state possessed subplots or important story beats in building korra and a/sami’s romatic interest and development:

The Last Stand

even that i can only really count because it was confirmed outside the narrative. before bryan’s post, the fandom generally considered the final scenes to be romantically ambiguous or open-ended.

substance is everything in storytelling. hitting the beats matters more than any amount of episodes.

to quote appabend it was so subtle it was nonexistent  which is why I say korrasami was a last minute retcon

What Korra and Asami got was BARELY friendship, especially since they had a grand total of five (possibly six) on-screen interactions after “Long Live the Queen.” Pairing them up in the finale made little sense given the utter lack of romantic buildup/relationship development and the just plain lack of interaction in general.

korra blushed at bolins compliment in spirits of competition after she was feeling down and borra sunk   korra while she  felt down blushed at a compliment

mako got a speech about what korra meant to him and how he admired her  

as a person  while asami failed to help her and just went youre the avatar we need you while tenzin actually helped her by pointing out how she had grown

Fact remains: Korra and Asami had very little on-screen interaction compared to Korra and just about everyone else, and Korra and Mako got nearly twice the interactions and nearly triple the screentime in Book 4 as Korra and Asami. You’re going to have to try way harder.

ikkinthekitsune . tumblr . com/post/122633714360/why-would-korrasami-not-last

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/112100564400

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/105933518980

fantastic-nonsense . tumblr . com/post/106480044135/hanyojai-fantastic-nonsense-some-korrasami

good writing is more important then a political message

[staycult]

highschool!minho as your boyfriend

pairing — fem!reader x minho

genre — fluffish angst-ish ? bullet scenario but mostly not, enemies to lovers

word count — 2k

happy birthday to our precious cat boy! 🐈

happy birthday lino!

you’re one of the best dancers in your school

competitions arent complete without you

i guess the popularity with dancing got over your head a little bit

to you, you were just proud

but others took it the wrong way, as per usual

“alright we’re going to have a new member in our crew, please give him a warm welcome!” your dance instructor clapped

you wiped off your sweat and sat down on the floor to listen further

“come in, lino!” she urged

the young man came in wearing gray sweats and a plain black shirt with a poker face on

you didnt really care nor felt a bond forming between you two

“hi, lee minho, nice to meet you” he smiled half heartedly

you heard the other girls in the room swoon at the sight of him

you were about to nudge your friend who was obviously squealing when the instructor interrupted

“[y/n]! stand over here, please” she pointed beside minho

so you complied

his scent was manly with a hint of softness

he was taller than you and had a lean body structure

your instructor was eyeing the both of you from head to toe and proceeded to call over another instructor

“see, they would be perfect for it!” she whisper shouted at her fellow instructor, still eyeing the both of us

“i do agree with you but dont you think minho is still new? he just came in” the other replied

“minho if you don’t mind? can i show him your audition video?” she asked

minho gave her a nod while he looked around the place with his arms crossed, while you looked like an idiot just standing there like 🧍🏻‍♀️

“wow! his body is flexible, you made the right choice with these two" the male instructor commended

“right?"

"alright, you two would be assigned to create a new choreography for the up coming dance competition. it should be hip hop styled, music of choice is yours." she instructed

your fellow dancers already went home since it was getting late, so you did too after the discussion

you didnt really talk to minho

you felt like you didnt need to, yet

unless it was about the dance

practices were always held after classes. you and the crew decided to brainstorm possible songs that you guys could dance to. all of the songs they were suggesting was boring and at this point you were frustrated and threw a fit. "god, think!" you sighed at your fellow dancers as you ruffled your hair in anger. "do you have any better ideas?" minho asked, nonchalant. "i evaluate whether or not the songs can be used. do you have any ideas?" you rolled your eyes, copying his tone.

he shook head and let out a light smirk, a rather amused one. he suggested songs and remixes that were actually good, but you can never say that. for the first time, someone actually had the courage to speak back to you during your angry state. it did hurt your ego a bit.

"no, i dont want that, it's ear-bleeding" you lied, just for the sake of your reputation in front of your fellow members. "im not asking for your permission, im showing this to noona," he said getting up from the floor with the computer and walked out to find our older instructor.

whispers and held back laughter was heard in the room while their eyes are focused to either you, or minho's back who just disappeared

being a little brat, you stomped over to minho ( who you found in the hallway, just outside your instructor's office ) "you!" you stormed over until youre close enough. without looking, he let out a sigh, "what?"

"what the hell was that about!" you half-shouted, eyebrows furrowed. "what? did i hurt your ego?" he raised an eyebrow, giving you a smirk. you were taken aback by his choice of words. no body has ever came this close to you. all he did was say the truth, because he really did hurt your ego. you hate being told what to do and you hate getting embarrassed in front of people.

your face turned red, "you know what? fuck you" you turned around and left. leaving him with this annoying smug look on his pretty face.

it became a routine

to argue with him during practice

you guys were partners in the said dance

being close with his body gives you the chance to take revenge

by making yourself heavy every time he has to carry you

but you learned that he's not the one to hold back

by letting go of you, causing you to fall off ass first

after a month straight of practice, it went like that

safe to say you hated each other's guts

he hated your bratty and egotistic attitude, and you hated him for pointing it out in front of every one

there's 3 more days until the performance

and somehow, nervousness was getting ahead of you.

"one last practice for today! let me see what you guys got." your instructor said as you guys were positioning yourselves in place. during the dance, you knew you made so many mistakes but you were still hoping it would go unnoticed. making the ending pose, every one clapped as well as the instructor.

"over all, it's a winning dance for me!" every one cheered for the mentor's compliment while you were feeling unsteady. "[y/n], work on the dance a little more okay? you seem a bit on edge" she gave you a small smile. embarrassment was written all over your face. improve? me? christ! it's much worse when minho, who is right beside you, heard that.

the instructor left and every one proceeded to pack their things. as you were about to close yours, "work on the dance a little more okay?" little shit minho repeated your instructors words, with a smug look on his face that you badly want to wipe off with a punch

"okay" you replied dryly, not wanting to engage with crap because of your rising nervousness. "looks like im about to take your place, brat" he added. you knew he was just messing around since both of you had been fighting like this almost every day. you gave him a nod because you just wanted to escape at this point. you placed your bag over your shoulder and opened the door, "don't you think maybe it's because you're not that good-"

"can we not do this right now? alright? i get it. if you really are so fucking great, congrats! now leave me alone." you spat, walking past him and left the studio. the sun was setting when you got out and it was a rather chill weather. it was fine, we're in the middle of october any way.

you sighed as you hugged yourself for comfort due to the strong wind. walking home, you decided to stop by a vending machine.

great! your money just had to be stuck in the vent. just when you thought your day could get worse, this happens. you placed your head on the glass of the machine in front of you while mindlessly playing with the buttons.

you regret losing your cool in front of minho like that, because you know he was just messing around. at some point during practice, you were slowly learning that being a brat is horrible and not everything will go my way.

you noticed that you were starting to change too.

you let out another sigh and kicked a foreign rock to express your frustration. you eyes went back to the stuck money and tried to get it out again. a random finger from behind pressed a red button on top of the machine, which immediately retrieved your money.

you turned back around to thank the person, "thank you-" your smile faded when you realized who it was. he had a small cat eye smile on, "hi" he said in a low tone, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"hi" you said rather awkwardly. "what drink do you want?" he said as he brought out his wallet, positioning himself in front of the machine. "no you don't have to" you protested. "please, let me do this, it's the least i can do for pissing you off"

"banana milk, and im sorry too" you replied, playing with your fingers. he gave you this 'why are you saying sorry' look. "im sorry for all the mean stuff i said back there, i dont know what has gotten into me, im just so nervous about the performance"

he nodded, implying that he's listening while typing and inserting the money on the machine. "im just sorry for being a brat in general," you smiled apologetically as you accepted the banana milk from him. both of you sat down beside the vending machine.

"you dont have to apologize you know? im the one who took it too far" he said, guilt plastered all over his face. "it's fine, i deserve it. besides if it wasnt for you, i wouldnt have notice how much of a bitch i am." you admitted with a light chuckle.

"i didnt mean what i said earlier by the way," he spoke, finishing up his own banana milk. "which one?" you asked. "when i said you were not that good, i didnt mean it. in fact, youre one of the best." he admitted, placing his empty banana milk beside him.

"you think so?" you asked with a smile. "i know so" he smiled back, removing his hairband and placing it back again. "maybe that's why im falling for you." he mumbled.

competition day came

you were feeling energetic today

bratiness level lowered down by 70%

the performance went really great

every one at your school was rooting for your team

which made you even more giddy

"and the grand champion for this year is..."

you heard your school's name and immediately hugged minho unintentionally out of joy

your legs were wrapped up in his waist and he was swinging you around, happy to win as well.

he let go of you gently, trying not to make things awkward

youve already touched his body due to the dance steps but it felt awkward after he confessed

after the celebration, your crew was in the back stage, preparing for the surprise

today is october 25, meaning it's his special day

you got out the cake you personally baked for him and motioned everyone to gather around before minho comes in

"surprise!" every one cheered and threw random pieces of paper towards him when he came in the back stage

"happy birthday to you! happy birthday to you! happy birthday dear minho, happy birthday to you" you sang along with the crew and faced him his cake

"make a wish, lino" you said as you waited for him to blow.

"i wish to be with you" he said out loud, not even minding the people around us and blew the candle out. a lot of ooos and cheers were heard, making you blush. you gathered frosting all over your finger and proceeded to wipe it on his face

he let out a fake shocked face as he did the same to you. by now, every one around you has frosting in your faces. musting up all the courage left in you. you made your way to minho once more and placed a frosting on his lips. he smirked at your sudden action as he lifted you up.

you pressed your lips against his, licking the frosting clean off of him. he gladly accepted the kiss, ignoring everyone around the both of you. pulling away, "maybe i am falling for you too, lino" you confessed. making him kiss you once more.

bf minho is very tsundere

as usual, dance practices together

vending machine dates after practice

lots and lots of i love yous while dancing

SLOW DANCING IN YOUR ROOM!!!!!!

would let you meet his cats bcs "you are now worthy"

helping each other out with missed assignments

your best friend

kisses are wild but soft

dance covers together

will literally break the vending machine to give you your banana milk

would buy you breakfast

holds your hand during break

cuddling with his cats!!!!!!

forehead kisses with reassurance

people dont get your inside jokes

a tease !!!!!

"baby, there is no one else like you"

author's note —

i tried to make this gender neutral but i dont know much about mxm dancing together! sorry about that, i tried to lessen the female details though.

im open for constructive criticism! i made this a birthday special for our lee know <3

[sweetescapeartist]

MY DBS MANGA CHAPTER 70 REVIEW

We learn in the last chapter that the Cerealian Dragon's name is Toronbo when Granolah speaks Namekian. Toronbo grants Granolah's wish but can't make Granolah stronger than the gods.

Here's the confusion I have... Goku is a mortal beyond GoDs so making Granolah the strongest mortal is making him stronger than gods. If you wanna say Beerus has been training and is now stronger than Goku, there's still a problem. It was said that Goku and Vegeta were stronger than some GoDs right before the ToP (but that might be anime only, so maybe it doesn't apply here). So Granolah is stronger than GoDs no matter what. If the gods that Toronbo is speaking of are the Angels, then that means Granolah is Ultra Instinct level of power since Goku is the lowest in Angel tier. But whatever. Bottom line is Granolah is temporarily stronger than Goku who may or may not be stronger than Beerus.

Granolah gets his wish granted and the cost is shortening his life... cool. Not much to say except let's see how its executed.

(I recently read that in DBXV2, during the Infinite History Saga, Videl is enchanted with Towa's Dark Magic spell by Dabura shaving off her life but granting her greater power. So granting power at the cost of lifespan has been done in DB before. Not in canon but in the games.)

Also, Granolah's life being shortened to 3 yrs got me thinking... Currently it's almost AGE 781 in the DBS manga timeline. Goku leaves to train Uub in AGE 784. We got 3 yrs left. The original manga shows Bulma said she hadn't seen Goku in 5 yrs. How I see DBS is that it is an alternate timeline that just happens to have a similar outcome to the EoZ.

So... why is Vegeta learing from Beerus again if Beerus isn't that strong now? Is Vegeta being like Krillin and continuing his learning from a master weaker than him, but gaining wisdom & knowledge? I-is Vegeta becoming Krillin 2.0?! (More like dollar-store Krillin)

I do think beerus got stronger tho. He seems very confident that Vegeta can get stronger from learning from him. Beerus probably saw Goku get UI then decide to train aftet the ToP

Anyways, Beerus is teaching us about hakai/destruction energy. Its erasing something from existence, not just destroying it (we already knew that). But, Vegeta quickly figures out how to do it anyways. By destroying a tiny pebble...

A tangent again but I personally think Piccolo is capable of easily learning Hakai energy. Think about it. Piccolo can create clothing out of nothing, why could he not do the reverse?

Goku is uninterested in what Beerus & Vegeta are doing. I dont know about you, but it sounds like Goku thinks that he's above Beerus in strength. Beerus & Vegeta aren't considered a challenge to him in any way. Goku sees UI as more important & better than anything Beerus has to teach, and Goku is right. Plus Goku learned Hakai on his own while Vegeta needs Beerus to teach him. It's a waste of Goku's time to learn it again.

(God Comics is funny. I imagine Toribot writes them)

Goku says "Let's see which one of us can be the strongest in the universe!" Really, Goku...? At present time, Goku is the strongest mortal in the universe already. He should know that. Then Vegeta for some reason thinks he will become the strongest in the universe. The last time manga Vegeta was the strongest mortal in the universe was... never. He's always behind Goku or whatever new opponent arises. This scene is meant to be comedic that they're arguing over who will be the greatest but it's not funny to me. And yet Vegeta fans still hold on for hope.

But why is Goku concerned about being the strongest between him & Vegeta? Goku is far above Vegeta. They're not rivals at this point. Also, Goku was the strongest in the universe until just a few moments ago. Goku should be saying "I knew bein' the strongest wouldn't last for too long. Roshi did tell me there will always be somebody stronger out there. Hehe! This is gettin' me excited! I can't wait to meet 'em!" (This would alsp parallel Monaito giving Granolah the same advice Goku already knows.)

Also, I guess Broly isn't that strong after all. Bye Broly, you served your purpose. And to think that Goku had said that he thinks Broly is stronger than Beerus...

Oh yeah. So Vegeta destroys a pebble. Impressive? Goku kinda gives a compliment or he is practically saying "Good job Vegeta! You're doing great following in my footsteps!" Seriously, this would be so much better and cooler if this seperate paths of training began right after the Universe 6 vs Universe 7 tournament. That would be the perfect spot to have them train under Beerus & Whis. [Vegeta using Hakai against Merged Zamasu, Goku able to fight Merged Zamasu temporarily because he is getting better at letting his body move on its own, Toppo & Vegeta using Hakai against each other as Goku & Jiren use power above GoDs. That would work so much better.]

Then Vegeta says he's gonna destroy bigger things soon... is that supposed to be more impressive? Its not. But this it to build up Vegeta even though there is nothing amazing about anything he is doing at the moment. Maybe later tho.

So Cerealians can't grow beards. Also I guess Granolah's race don't age? His hair grew when his lifespan was shortened but he has no wrinkles. It seems that they age more gracefully than Saiyans. If he has some wrinkles he would have looked cooler imo. Or those lines under the eyes at the very least. If the wish shortened his life & made his hair grow, it should have also showed that he aged. (Here's an edit I made of "Grampa Granolah." You're welcome)

And remember Vegeta destroying a pebble? Granolah can suddenly destroy big rocks! Cool right?! No? Its not cool? Showing Granolah destroy a much larger object right afterwards kinda belittles Vegeta's accomplishment.

Oatmil is surprised by a boulder exploding. This means one of 2 things. Oatmil is stupid & never saw an Granolah explode a boulder. Or it's implying that the boulder exploding is some technique Oatmil doesn't know of. Idk how he can tell its any different from just blowing up a rock with ki. I think it's supposed to be destruction energy. If it is then, ok. If getting his wish was so easy, then why can't he suddenly learn destruction as well?

Yay! Monaito! (This really should be a Namekian focused arc)

Granolah reminds me of Zamasu with his attitude a bit. Monaito tells him somebody stronger will definetly appear. Granolah has become like Vegeta and is over confident, so he is destined to get humbled. And think about this. Goku can probably train a bit and surpass Granolah within a week.

Granolah can now sense ki. Meaning he can have the destruction technique or UI, because why not?

Monaito blames himself for Granolah's actions. Its not your fault Monaito! You did nothing wrong! Dont be so hard on yourself.

Whis being a creep and peeping on people lol.

Granolah's hair growing was pointless because he cuts it off soon after. Nothing changed visually. This kinda reminds me of how Moro lost his arm. Goku gave him a senzu, Moro grew it back, & then Moro broke his arm when attacking Goku. Then Moro tore his arm off & reattached his old one. There was no need for Moro to grow his arm back then tear it off. Similarly, there is no need for Granolah to have grown long hair then cut it off.

Maki still brings a smile to my face. She & Gas stand out the most out of the Heeters. Maki's personality is kinda like Zangya combined with a teasing Bulma. Gas reminds me of a Krillin/Piccolo fusion with dreadlocks. I also ship Maki x Gas cause they're short and look cute together. (please don't be siblings so I can draw them together🤞)

Granolah fights Oil & Maki. I'm not impressed. They seem like they could be defeated by Chaoitzu (he's stronger than Raditz and probably Nappa now too). Granolah's movements could be seen as UI. If it is or isn't UI, it doesn't matter. Showing off that kind of power is like Goku using Ultra Instinct during a rematch with Nam or King Chappa. Its not effective storytelling. There had to be a better way of showing Granolah's new strength than making him fight opponents that give him zero challenge.

The art is good as usual and the panel flow is nice. Toyotaro is improving at creating the illusion of motion. The environment being used in the fight was smart and a good visual. Toyo still uses a ton of panels almost every page tho. But he's still a better artist than I am.

Granolah appears to have used Hakai again. Not the explosive variant but the sand variant (yes I think there are 2 ways of using Hakai).

The "Sand Variant" that Beerus & Goku (& maybe Granolah) have used.

The "Explosive Variant" Beerus & Vegeta (& maybe Granolah) have used.

Maki thinks the "Hakai" is magic so that's interesting. I would say I'd like for the next enemy to be a magic user but, we know how Moro turned out... 😓

Maki has "ki claws" & I like the idea but it would be better if she had used it against an enemy she can defeat. It doesn't make her look useful in this fight. Gas seems confident when he is about to fight Granolah, but Elec stops him. Gas would've gotten beaten but it make ya wonder what Gas can do.

Granolah appears to be a person that is easily manipulated and persuaded. He even gave information they weren't even asking for. He'll probably be easily convinced and manipulated by Freeza/the Hedters or quickly have a truce with Goku.

The Heeters plan to go to Planet Cereal to get the Dragon Balls. As I suspected, the Cerealian Dragon Balls were created so that it would be easy for wishes to be granted. Gathering 2 Dragon Balls on a nearby planet instead of gathering 7 on New Namek or Earth. Plus these new Dragon Balls ensures no interaction between Earthlings & Granolah/the Heeters. A perfect way to write Gohan & company out of the story... *sigh* 😔😒

We learn Cerealians live for 2 centuries. How's that compare to other races in Universe 7? Freeza & King Cold apparently can live more than 200 yrs, But that may be because they are mutants. Namekians can live for like 500 yrs & its possible for them to reincarnate themselves too. So in a way, Namekians can live forever. Saiyans stay youthful & live to be in their 80's, but rapidly age when they reach their 60's or 70's. Average Earthlings appear live to be in their 80's or 90's but some are over 100 yrs old (Dr. Briefs, Panchy, & Ox King are in their 90's in GT) and others can increase their lifespan through elixers or the Paradise Herb. Just some thoughts of mine.

Maki says "If he ices Freeza..." Ha, an ice pun. Elec wants to defeat Freeza so he can control his army. Its revealed they wanna kill Granolah & that they worked with Freeza to destroy his planet & race. Well... that more than likely means they're gonna die by Granolah's hand or Freeza's. This info is also an attempt to make the reader more sympathetic for Granolah. Granolah is too bland (pun intended) so I don't feel any more sympathy than I already had for him. Elec plans to make Goku & Vegeta fight Granolah since Granolah hates Saiyans. Smart but we all kinda expected it. Not bad writing tho.

The final panel talks about fate bringing the 3 (Goku, Vegeta, & Granolah) together. Sounds like a repeat of the Broly movie.

We've had 4 chapters in this arc & not 1 panel of Freeza... If Freeza doesnt appear & do something in the next chapter then I will be disappointed in the writing. Showing Freeza here and there would give tension and build up until we get the encounter with him. We also have no idea who Oatmil is. Is he an A.I. or a person? Not that big of a deal yet, but I would like to find out soon. Either show Freeza or tell us more about Oatmil next chapter pleaae

This chapter was like oatmeal (the food not the character) without butter, brown sugar, milk, & honey or raisins. Not bad, but not very good either. 

So here's my thoughts on the things that could or could not happen in this arc.

Goku vs Granolah. I don't care for the fight because the power is at a point that it doesnt make sense for enemies to get to without cheating somehow. The fight will look cool but I have no interest in it.

Vegeta vs Granolah will have Vegeta being stomped as always and Vegeta fans will make excuses & complain how it's not fair. A lot of Vegeta fans often make fun of Yamcha & Krillin for getting beat up even though those 2 bravely fight opponents leagues stronger than they are. Vegeta has gotten stomped by opponents more times than Krillin & Yamcha combined but the fans gotta deflect somehow. I don't care to hear or see the complaining again.

The interaction and dialogue between Granolah & Vegeta is going to be more interesting than their fight. But I worry because Toyo isn't the best at writing dialogue.

I have no reason to care about power growth, certain interactions, or Goku & Vegeta's training.

What I am curious about/want to see?

Monaito's well being. I want him to reunite with other Namekians. But I think he's been set up to die.

Lore about the dragon gods & Namekian lore we probably wont get.

I want Piccolo, Krillin, Gohan, & others will be involved. Piccolo because of the Namekian & wosh granting dragon lore. Gohan because his interaction with Granolah eould be interesting since Gohan is half Saiyan & views himself as an Earthling. Krillin & other Earthlings because they can bring tensions where characters like Goku & Vegeta can't. Those 2 are too strong for there to be any real tension. However Earthlings aren't all powerful so them using wits to survive is more exciting. But I doubt any of their involvement.

How long a Cerealian year is? Is it shorter than a Namekian year? How much time will pass for the Cerealian Dragon Balls to be active? How much stronger than Granolah will Goku get? Hopefully the answers aren't lazy...

Will Beerus finally fight somebody? There are 6 mortals that are near or above his power (Goku, Granolah, Vegeta, Broly, Freeza, Gohan).

Who's the villian of the next arc & what explanation is going to be given for them having power on the level of Angels? Angel tier fights don't sound interesting to me anymore. After those kinds of battles, Goku will have no challengers left.

Will Goku disappear to train or something so the story can TRY to match up with the EoZ?

Will Goten, Trunks, & Marron hit their growth spurts within 3 yrs?

Will we get spin-off manga about other characters? PLEASE!? 🙏

Also DBS moved too quickly when it comes to power. Now we're at the point that Goku & Vegeta need to stop being involved in fights for there to be any actual threat or tension. The Buu saga took place in AGE  774. After training for 4 years of peace, Goku thought SS3 & fusion was his limits as a Saiyan and he was right. Well, kinda... Goku was introduced to god ki near the end of AGE 778. Then in AGE 781, Goku masters Ultra Instinct... He mastered an Angel technique in 2 year or 2.5 yrs. That was waaaay too fast. As a result the storytelling & writing are suffering from this rushed progress. Now we're gonna have an Angel tier opponent? According to the pattern of DBS, Goku's gonna end up surpassing the Angels within 2 or 3 yrs after learning god ki. Thats not impressive for Goku, that's terrible writing. And no, Goku getting this strong so fast is not a benefit to Saiyans either. It just shows us that without god ki, Saiyans ain't all that powerful unless they're the legendary Saiyan like Broly. Saiyans didn't even have a concept of training until Goku was trained by Earthlings. Gohan, Freeza, 17, & I'm pretty sure Piccolo as well have all surpassed SS3 without the help of god ki. God ki makes Saiyans look like they have limits. With god ki, the writing is broken....

I got off topic again... Anyways that's the end of my review.

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 61 Poll Results (for Anime Only Watchers)

The poll closed with 164 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Manga Readers’ poll, click here.

Anime only watchers, beware of spoilers if you venture over to the manga readers’ poll results.

---

RATE THE EPISODE 142 Responses

Episode 61 received even better reception than episode 60 did for anime only viewers, with all votes leaning 3-5 on the rating scale, none of our respondents seemed let down by the episode! 

AMAZING!! not action heavy this time, but the information i gained  was a big insight on what’s to come! lots of things are gonna go down and i’m s c a r e d. ready for next sunday 😈🔥

It was fire 

I really loved this episode, better than the last episode. Animation quality was on par with movie quality. MAPPA is giving us their best, ALL HAIL MAPPA.

1 word. Awesome

I love the pacing on this episode and the small details in it. 

Give me more!!!

bruh

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING WAS YOUR FAVORITE SCENE/MOMENT? 142 Responses

Reiner monologuing about the 104th at the dinner table took front and center seat this week with 43% of viewers favoring this scene the most. Trailing behind, 16.9% enjoyed the scene where Reiner meets up with the Warrior Cadets, and 9.9% enjoyed seeing the human forms of the Cart and Jaw titans for the first time.

WE FORGOT TO ASK LAST WEEK D: WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING SCENES/MOMENTS FROM EPISODE 60 WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 142 Responses

Last week, the highest percentage of people (at 30.3%) enjoyed Reiner’s, “I’m sick and tired… of walls.” 19% favored the scene of Zeke’s scream turning Eldians into titans. 17.6% were most hyped up over Reiner and Galliard wrecking Fort Slava.

MAPPA WENT ALL OUT WITH THE CINEMATOGRAPHY IN THIS EPISODE. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE CINEMATIC PANS AND ROTOSCOPE ANIMATION? 142 Responses

Overall, 75.4% of the total vote went in favor of the animation this week, with 33.8% of viewers stating they felt as though they were watching a movie, 32.4% enjoying the fluidity, and 9.2% enjoying the upgrade from the stiffer animation in the previous season. 10.6% felt the rotoscoping and cinematic shots were a little too over the top for an anime, and 10.6% are indifferent. A small handful aren’t enjoying the cinematic animation at all. 

Hated the rotoscope, loved everything else.

It was a bit off-putting at first but I've grown to really like it

it was different but i liked it! it was cool. reminded me of some anime movies i’ve seen, though unique in it own sense

Thought it was great and fluid just at some points like the scene with udo on the docks felt a bit choppy.

Beautiful work, it honestly felt like I was watching a movie. From cinematography to shot framing to the animation. A dialogue heavy episode felt exciting, which is amazing.

I really liked the animation

The animation is so glowy

NOW THAT WE’VE GOTTEN TO HEAR A LITTLE MORE OF THE NEW OST TRACKS, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE SOUNDTRACK SO FAR THIS SEASON? 142 Responses

People are overall enjoying the new music so far, with 41.5% feeling it really compliments the change in atmosphere and 35.9% REALLY enjoying the songs and finding their usage very good. 9.9% feel they’re just ok while 7.7% miss the music being composed solely by Sawano. A smaller handful aren’t enjoying the new music.

They DEFINITELY bring the right vibes lol. again, different, but i like it!

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE CLOSEUP OF ZEKE’S MOUTH? 141 Responses

In our first of a series of unnecessary crack questions, 31.9% find Zeke’s mouth closeup to have been pretty cool animation. 24.8% are very concerned about Zeke’s treatment of his lungs (do shifters get lung damage?). 20.6% didn’t care about Zeke’s mouth at aoo, while 14.2% would welcome a smooch from him. A handful of people just think it’s gross, lol.

Fucking hate zeke smh 🙄

He smokin a spliffy 😂 not no ciggy 

what chapstick using??lmao.  it was a cool scene

WHAT’S YOUR OPINION ABOUT ELDIAN ASSES? 140 Responses

Eldian asses didn’t turn out to be too controversial, with the majority (42.1%) just wanting to know the details of Zeke’s secret ass wiping technique. 10.7% just think Eldian asses are neat, and another 10% are more enthusiastic about some nice Eldian asses. 25.7% are confused about the question’s inclusion, and 11.4% don’t understand why this was asked at all.

DO YOU WANT REINER TO GIVE YOU A HEAD PAT? 140 Responses

In a close race, 42.1% of respondents would be thrilled to get a nice head pat from Reiner! 41.4% apparently don’t, and just wanna know what the heck the pollsters are smoking while writing up these questions. 11.4% do NOT want Reiner head pats. :(

ZEKE SEEMS TO BE KEEPING HIS ROYAL LINEAGE A SECRET FROM MARLEY DESPITE HIS LOYALTY TO THEM. ANY IDEAS WHY YOU THINK HE IS? 139 Responses

Zeke, the “wonderboy” (as General Calvi puts it) who sold out his own parents, has never been doubted by Marley in terms of his loyalty. Yet, for some reason he seems to be keeping his royal bloodline a secret from them. When we asked why that is, over half of respondents (56.1%) state that they are suspicious of Zeke and his real motives, believing that he is plotting something under Marley’s nose. 25.2% feel that he doesn’t want them to know he’s royal so that they can’t abuse his power, and 12.9% think he simply doesn’t let them know so that they won’t kill him. 

I forgot he was royal 

maybe they will force him to continue the bloodline through children, or maybe he will get used or killed

Well if they dont know hes got a hereditary advantage over both his predeccesors and succesors, he'll always be recognised as the best beast titan and heaps better than my boy Colt.

WE LEARNED IN THIS EPISODE THAT FALCO’S LAST NAME IS “GRICE.” DO YOU THINK THIS WILL HOLD ANY SIGNIFICANCE? 139 Responses

32.4% of respondents don’t remember anyone named Grice. To recap, “Grice” is the name of the person who recruited Grisha Yeager into the Restorationist group, and is the one who was kicked off the wall for the restorationist titans to chase after once they were transformed by Marley. For those that did remember this seemingly random person, 52.2% feel that this relation will be brought up again and have importance to the story, and 12.9% feel it doesn’t really mean anything other than being a neat little detail. 

I feel like you asking this implies that there’s something to it

Not sure yet. But, Falco and Colt seem to be really caring and aware of how the Marlyeans treat Marly-Eldians (at least compared to the other warrior candidates). Also, when we saw their parents they seemed kind too, showing lots of concern for Colt. Maybe they learnt what the former restorationist/other Grice was doing and his cause of death and sent their kids to the warrior program for the same reason Grisha and Dina did Zeke? My bet is Colt & Falco are the restorationist Grice's nephews?

YOUR REACTION TO THE CART TITAN BEING A CUTE WOMAN? 140 Responses

Pieck deserves a colorful pie chart, and she got one! 25.7% say she’s best girl, 22.9% think she’s utterly adorable. 13.6% of viewers already knew about Pieck before getting to this point and were unsurprised. At a tie, 11.4% of voters think that it’s amazing, or they were shocked to find out that the quadrupedal nightmare titan is really just a short, cute woman.

I worked it out last episode since the armbands appeared to indicate the 'type/status' of Eldians, but I was a bit surprised last episode I thought from the trailer the red bands may be special lineages i.e. Ackerman, Oriental clan, and Riess/Fritz. Still think she may be from the oriental clan though since the only characters we've seen with a similar appearance to her are Mikasa and her mother.  

she kinda shawty 👀 but she looks scary too

WE WERE FORMALLY INTRODUCED TO MORE CHARACTERS THIS WEEK, SO WE WILL ASK AGAIN… WHICH NEW CHARACTER IS YOUR FAVORITE SO FAR? 143 Responses

Last week, Falco was the most favored of the new cast with only 40% of the vote. This week, he shoots up over 10 percentage points, with 50.3% of viewers feeling the most positively toward him. Pieck comes in second with 17.5% of the vote, and Gabi is hanging on with just 12.6% of the vote. Colt and Galliard are trailing just a little bit more behind them. 

Gabi best girl

WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS ON THE FATE OF YMIR? 144 Responses

While we did get teased about Ymir’s fate in Season 3, seeing the scene in full can definitely have more of an impact. 37.5% of respondents have accepted the notion of Ymir dying, and feel that it was a decent end for her character, all things considered. 22.9% are in complete and total anguish over her fate, and 20.1% are simply just disappointed and had hoped to see more of her. A very small percentage think that this is actually a red herring, and that Ymir is somehow still alive somewhere.

Already saw this in season 3

Appropriately grim and realistic given what lengths Marley will go to in order to protect themselves 

I am in so much pain please euthanize me that’s my wife

i didn’t really like her anyway so it’s fine(but it was still a bit sad) 

Kinda hate crimey considering shes the only OUT (@jean) charcter. Nah jk. Like wasnt shocked tho coz we saw Galliard last ep

Let's fucking GOOOOOO

Galliard will NEVER replace Ymir, I already hate his bitch ass

So Galliard really is a replacement scrappy eh? I already hate him JUST for that.

TURNS OUT THAT GALLIARD IS MARCEL’S BROTHER. DO YOU THINK THIS WILL BE SIGNIFICANT? 143 Responses

Over half of respondents (52.4%) believe that Galliard’s relation to Marcel will have significance at some point. 32.9% think that it might, but don’t want to say either way. A small percentage feel it’s just a detail that won’t matter. 12.6% have completely forgotten who Marcel is (to refresh your memory, Ymir ate him before RBA attacked the walls).

DO YOU THINK THE MAN WEARING THE ARMBAND INCORRECTLY WILL BE IMPORTANT? 144 Responses

At 73.6%, the majority of viewers are eyeing the random amputee soldier who Falco briefly helped out, believing that he will be important in some manner moving forward. 13.9% believe that it’s just a random soldier, and the scene maybe meant more in terms of showing Falco’s kindness. 12.5% aren’t sure what to make of the amputee soldier at all.

LAST WEEK, WHEN ASKED WHO WILL INHERIT THE ARMORED TITAN, THE MAJORITY PICKED FALCO. AFTER THIS EPISODE, WHO DO YOU THINK WILL INHERIT THE ARMORED TITAN NOW? 143 Responses

Falco is still the most favored to inherit the Armored Titan from Reiner with the percentage of people believing he will jumping from 37.6% to 48.3%. 21.7% are still confident that Gabi will ultimately be the one who gets to eat Reiner. 28.7% believe that neither of them will inherit Reiner’s titan at all.

DO YOU THINK THAT REINER REALLY BELIEVES THE PARADISIANS ARE DEVILS? 143 Responses

The overwhelming majority of respondents don’t believe that Reiner really means what he says when he calls the Paradisians “savage, heartless devils.” Only a small percentage feel he does really means what he says, and a handful of others aren’t sure.

HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT REINER WITH WHAT WE’VE SEEN IN THIS ARC SO FAR? 143 Responses

The majority of viewers feel very positively about Reiner and are enjoying seeing more of him, with 46.2% stating that Reiner is really starting to grow on them, while 26.6% already liked Reiner from the start. 18.2% are beginning to feel more empathy for Reiner, although they still aren’t huge fans, and a smaller percentage don’t like him and haven’t been swayed by the narrative as of yet. 

Always seemed like there was lots to him, enjoying the furthered development into his psyche :) 

he’s so hot omg. i feel so terrible cause he’s clearly suffering from ptsd and his disorder too. he seems torn. i do like how he is playing a major role so far. 

I’m in love with Reiner and always have been

Meh

Reiner became 1000% hotter after his life fell apart

REINER AND GABI ARE REVEALED TO BE COUSINS. THOUGHTS? 142 Responses

36.6% of respondents were genuinely shocked to learn that Gabi and Reiner are cousins. 21.8% feel more invested in Gabi’s character arc after knowing this information. 19% were already spoiled on this, and 15.5% don’t really care about it at all. 

Kinda thought she wanted to fuck her cousin lmao

Makes me horrified how casually they talk abt eating Reiner

They had the same last name so I figured they must have had some relation.

Yee haw

GABI QUESTIONS REINER AFTER HE TALKED ABOUT THE 104TH, ASKING IF PEOPLE ON PARADIS WERE ALL BAD. DO YOU THINK SHE CAN OVERCOME HER BRAINWASHING TO SEE THAT PARADISIANS AREN’T EVIL? 143 Responses

The majority think that there is a possibility for Gabi to see things from a new perspective over time. 40.6% aren’t completely sold on it yet, but also believe that it’s within the realm of possibility. 32.9% are very confident that this is the direction her story arc is going to take, and 26.6% think that nothing will be able to undo years of brainwashing for her.

THE TYBURS ARE SAID TO BE AN AFFLUENT FAMILY THAT HOLDS THE WARHAMMER TITAN, BUT HAVE NEVER BEEN INVOLVED IN ANY CONFLICT. WHY WOULD THEY WANT TO GET INVOLVED NOW? 139 Responses

While we still don’t know much about the Tybur family, we thought we’d check in and see what preconceived notions viewers may already have about them. 27.3% believe the Tybur family feel the same as Marley and see Paradis as a threat. 30.2% think that the only reason they’d want to get involved in the conflict is if they get something about it. 41.7% think that the Tyburs are super sus and ultimately will have their own agenda for attacking Paradis. 

They got the good life already, why battle?

WITH AN ATTACK ON PARADIS BEING IMMINENT, HOW DO YOU THINK REINER WILL REACT WHEN HE RETURNS TO THE ISLAND? 139 Responses

We’ve seen Reiner struggle over the weight of his sins in previous seasons, with Ymir even pointing out that he has developed a type of “split personality” to cope with the horror he forced onto the people of Paradis. With the prospect of returning to the island, we asked how you think Reiner will handle the situation. With the highest percentage, 32.4% of respondents feel that Reiner’s mental state will make him completely ineffective if he returns to Paradis. 28.8% think he may even completely switch back to his “soldier persona” once he faces his former comrades again. 26.6% believe that he will keep himself together and stay focused on the mission handed to him. 9.4% think he will find a way to avoid going back altogether. 

Honestly, don't know.

I wouldnt say ineffective, probably just ina daze of sorts. Like hes not fully in the moment.

Idk if he is even gonna go

Not Sure

I hope my boi Reiner makes it through!

REINER FLASHBACKS NEXT WEEK! ARE YOU EXCITED TO FINALLY GET THE WARRIORS’ BACKSTORY? 142 Responses

The vast majority are happy to be finally getting the Warriors’ backstory in the next episode, with 69% feeling overwhelmed with excitement about it, and 19.7% just happy to finally be getting to this point. A smaller percentage don’t really care about learning their backstory and a handful of people are actually dreading it. 

I loved the baby warrior flashback and can’t wait for next week.

ON A SCALE OF REINER TO ZEKE, HOW EAGER ARE YOU TO GET BACK TO PARADIS? 141 Responses

While there is a handful of people who are enjoying the new perspective and getting to know these new characters in Marley, the majority of viewers are (unsurprisingly) eager to see what’s going on with the original cast after the 4 year time skip and the cliffhanger at the ocean in season 3. A message from manga readers: we know your pain, just hang in there!

This arc isn't really doing it for me. The story is only interesting when it focused on the 104th.

If their goal is to make me sympathize with the Warriors it ain't working, I frankly don't give a crap about their sob stories and want to see Eren and friends wreck shit for them

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

Animation and graphics quality is amazing. The sea was CGI too which feels a bit too detailed compared to other things. The plot and vibe is amazing. I like the WW2 style of things. There are so many interactions coming just the thought makes me hyped up. I can easily rewatch it and notice new details and i enjoy it too. Feels really packed and intense.

Solid, loved the animation props to MAPPA, cant wait to see Reiner's character development.

Kinda just people walking around with HELLA ptsd.  Overall kinda vibey Very reminiscent of seas 3 part 1. I will say kinda tgf about these knew kids accept Colt, just wanna see the ogs and Jeans side part. I also HATE Reiner but.........dare I say.....he's growing in me???? Not gabi tho 

Great episode, the trailer's beginning to make a lot more sense now. I didn't expect that guy with the long blonde hair declaring Eren as the enemy (from the trailer) to be part of the Tybur family (maybe I'm wrong here but he looked identical to one of the Tybur family members in the photo Zeke showed.) I assumed he was maybe the Marley leader haha. I think he may be the warhammer titan but it's hard to tell at this point. Regarding the Tybur family, another curious thing is how they are celebrated internationally not just domestically for their help during the great titan war. I am curious whether Marley only treat the Tybur family well because if they didn't that would create issues globally? It seems like the Tybur's have lots of power. But, I wonder if the war hammer titan will be a letdown... I thought it would be the 'big boss' of the titans but after learning that titan doesn't go through training like the other titan shifters and never fought I feel like it's a 50/50 on whether the shifter will be strong or not... I also feel like the guy Falco spoke to was Eren, and this could hint at Eren noticing and possibly trying to indoctrinate Falco? and he was possibly watching Reiner talk to the kids? That was probably Pieck though. Curious how Pieck's father was shown but not mother, he also didn't look like he was from the oriental clan maybe we have another Mikasa on our hands (half Ackerman/Oriental clan) that would be cool, maybe a little bit fanservicey tho.

I like that the focus is on world building right now

I’m just so excited to see what’s coming next

It was friggin awesome but I’m curious on who fell off the roof 🤔

Who is the guy who jumped and died ? :(

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 138 Responses

Thank you again for participating! We’ll see you again next week!

[albapuella]

How to Lose a Lover in 10 Days or Less: A Comprehensive Guide to Becoming a Future Romantic Failure (Chapter Three)

AO3

Fandom: Homestuck

Summary: How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days AU Dave needs to win a bet; Karkat needs to write an article. Shenanigans ensue.

Tags: Humanstuck, alternate universe - no sburb session, POV switches galore, implied/referenced child abuse Author’s note: This story is the result of a jam session I did with aceAdoxography on the davekat thirst federation discord server. This one's a little out of my usual wheelhouse, but I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. New chapters every Saturday/Sunday.  Didn’t bother with the formatting this time: You want the fancy formatting, go to AO3 :D

Day 3:

Since Karkat had not managed to scare Dave off with the... outburst yesterday, he figured he’d hooked the idiot as well as he was ever going to. Which meant it was time to start fucking it up. He did his best to ignore the sense of loss already forming in his chest at the thought. Whatever frustrations he’d felt during that hang out/date thing Dave had put him through yesterday, he couldn’t deny that he’d enjoyed the experience, too.

Dave was a dork who talked too much, but he was also witty and charming in a maladroit sort of way. And it had been nice to have someone appreciate Karkat’s sense of humor in return. For once. A part of him wished he had longer to enjoy their time together, but he knew better.

Since he knew better, he also knew it wasn’t the time to mope. It was time to go on the full offensive. “Offensive” being the operative word. In this case, it meant acting like himself. Karkat had been on his best behavior up to this point, and now he’d show Dave who the “real him” really was. If he played his cards right, he probably wouldn’t even have to go on another date to seal the deal.

Karkat felt his eyes ache, and he hated himself for being such an idiot. He’d known this wasn’t going to last—even without his article, it never would have lasted. He’d already proven a countless number of times that, while a fairly good friend, he was simply terrible as a romantic partner. Dave was just one more guy he’d never really had a chance with. Just one more tally mark to add to his failures.

---

When Dave woke up the next day, he saw that he had quite a few messages waiting for him. A handful from Rose about wedding plans (with a reminder of the dress code, because of course her wedding would have a fully defined dress code). A bunch from his far-flung friend Jade (mostly telling a story which did not require more than a quick “cool” on his part). A couple from John (who was excited that he’d be seeing Dave at the wedding). There were also several from Karkat. Which was kind of a relief: Dave hadn’t liked that he’d been the first one to message him all the time: it made him feel like he was bugging the guy. Especially after waking him up yesterday.

CG: OKAY ASSHOLE, HERE’S THE DEAL:

CG: YOU WANT TO DATE THE REAL ME. FINE.

CG: I AM DONE BEING ON MY BEST BEHAVIOR.

CG: BE PREPARED FOR ME TO COMMENT ON EVERY INANITY THAT DRIBBLES FROM YOUR MOUTH LIKE THE LEAVINGS OF AN INCONTINENT PIGEON.

CG: YOU ARE NOT HALF AS FUNNY AS YOU THINK YOU ARE. ALSO YOUR “RAPS” ARE AN AFFRONT TO THE GENRE AS WELL AS TO THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE.

CG: IF YOU THINK I AM JOKING OR BEING “CUTE”, YOU ARE WRONG. A STATE YOU SHOULD BE EXTREMELY FAMILIAR WITH BECAUSE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY SUFFERING FROM AT LEAST MODERATE BRAIN DAMAGE.

CG: I AM NOT NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN “A SNACK”. I ALSO DO NOT HAVE A “SEXY PROFESSOR THING GOING”. IN THE ENTIRE SPAN OF MY MISERABLE EXISTENCE, I HAVE NEVER BEEN ANYTHING WHICH COULD BE CONSIDERED TO BE IN EVEN THE MEAGEREST OF WAYS “SEXY”.

CG: MAYBE YOU WOULD BE ABLE TO SEE THAT FOR YOURSELF IF YOU EVER TOOK OFF THOSE DOUCHE SHADES YOU ARE ALWAYS WEARING.

CG: I HOPE YOU HAVE ENJOYED THIS SMALL TASTE OF WHAT IS TO COME IN YOUR FUTURE SHOULD YOU DECIDE TO KEEP DATING ME.

Dave read the messages a few times, frowning. Mostly, he felt confused, too confused to feel either amused or insulted. Sudden. This was sudden. Also, the more he read the messages, the more he thought Karkat was being more mean to himself than to Dave. His inner Rose (the voice which sounded like Rose but was not nearly as smart as the real thing) said that Karkat was lashing out, hoping to hurt Dave before Dave could hurt him.

And wasn’t that sad?

TG: first of all

TG: you are a total snack

TG: this is not negotiable

TG: do not pass go do not collect 200 dollars

TG: not to be all objectifying or whatever

TG: but that was literally the first thing i thought when i saw you

TG: that guy is a total snack

TG: and fuck you you are sexy

TG: i bet you look even better without the sweater

TG: you are the bank and im the debtor

TG: payin compliments is my cheddar

TG: need proof read the letter

TG: dear mr vantas you are hella sexy signed me

CG: OH MY GOD.

CG: THAT WAS THE PART YOU CHOSE TO FOCUS ON. I DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOU AT ALL. MOST PEOPLE DON’T LIKE BEING INSULTED. IS THIS A KINK FOR YOU? IS THAT WHAT THIS IS? ARE YOU A FUCKING MASOCHIST?

Dave was grinning so much his cheeks hurt. Nailed it.

TG: im not a masochist

TG: but i think i might be getting a thing for grumpy assholes

TG: it needs more testing

TG: how about we hang out for a few hours today

TG: and see

“CG is typing” appeared and disappeared several times.

CG: REALLY. YOU REALLY WANT TO KEEP DATING ME.

TG: yea unless you dont want to keep dating me

TG: i hope you do

TG: want to keep dating me

TG: i want to know you better

TG: and kiss you sometime

This time the “CG is typing” message went on for quite a while. Dave wondered if maybe he shouldn’t have sent that last message. Then again, he’d already called the guy sexy several times; saying he wanted to kiss him wasn’t weird.

CG: IF YOU’RE SURE YOU WANT TO KEEP DOING THIS, THEN FINE. OKAY. I THINK I WANT TO GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER TOO. JUST REMEMBER I GAVE YOU AMPLE WARNING OF WHAT THE REAL ME IS LIKE. WHEN I INEVITABLY END UP HURTING YOUR FEELINGS, YOU WILL HAVE NO ONE TO BLAME BUT YOURSELF.

TG: score

---

After, unwisely, agreeing to meet Dave at the park again before going to some secret secondary date destination he had in mind, Karkat slipped his phone into his pocket in a daze. He was still reeling. Where had he misjudged this situation? He’d been certain he’d done enough to scare Dave away, and yet, here he was with another date to prepare for. Masochism or brain damage—those were the only options. Considering how much Dave had insisted on Karkat’s attractiveness, he was leaning towards the latter.

Of course, the words alone were only half of the total package. Even Dave would find difficulty deriving whatever enjoyment he got out of Karkat’s insults when they were being delivered at an ear-ringing volume. Karkat heaved a deep sigh. All he had to do was be himself on this date. That had always been enough for every other person he’d dated to leave him. Dave would be no different: he was just dumber, so it was taking him longer to get with the program.

* Thinks I’m “sexy”. Definite brain damage. Probable masochist. Raps have not increased in quality but I’m starting to get used to them.

---

The problem was Dave knew what he liked to do, what he found fun, but he didn’t know Karkat well enough yet to have much of an idea of what Karkat liked to do. Usually, Dave would have just asked, but seeing as Karkat had just been prepared to be dumped, he didn’t think the question would go over well.

When Dave approached the YO this time, Karkat was already sitting on the bench. His head was bowed over his notepad, and he was furiously writing. Although tempted to look over his shoulder and see what he was doing, Dave decided not to. If it turned out to be something deeply personal, he’d feel like a creep.

Whatever it was held Karkat’s full attention. Dave could be very stealthy, but he wasn’t even trying to be quiet as he got closer. Finally, he was standing right beside where Karkat was sitting. Still nothing. Remembering the reaction he’d gotten the other day, he flopped down close to Karkat, making the other man jump. “Hey.”

Karkat brought his notepad up to his chest, hiding it, and glared. Despite his clear irritation and the roominess of the bench, he didn’t move away. “What the fuck, Dave? Are you incapable of conducting yourself like a normal person? Or am I just special?”

Dave grinned. Looked like Karkat had meant what he’d said about acting more like himself. “I don’t know, you are pretty special. Not in the Special Olympics way,” he hastened to add as he realized his compliment might not come across complimentary. “I mean, nothing against them, they’re great,” he continued, now realizing the actual insult he was now offering them and not wanting to be that guy, “but that’s not what I’m talking about.”

A sort of disbelieving half-smile. “Should I stop you now, or let you keep going?”

“Oh, definitely stop me,” Dave said, relieved. He gestured to the notepad Karkat was no longer holding so tightly against himself. “What are you working on?”

“Nothing important,” Karkat said brusquely, shoving the notepad into his bag as though it had personally offended him. “Something for my work.”

It occurred to Dave that he actually had no idea what Karkat did for a living. “What do you do?”

For a moment, Karkat only regarded him with deep suspicion. Then he sighed. “I write for Dubiously Cultured.” Apparently, Dave’s confusion showed on his face, for he elaborated, “It’s basically a gay Cosmo.” Then he frowned. “You know, a magazine with fashion tips? Make-up? Relationship advice?”

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Dave said quickly. The last thing he wanted was for his eyes to glaze over on his date like they did when Rose started talking about her magazine (whose title he could not recall at this moment if he’d been being held at gunpoint). “Are you writing an article? Laying down the keep your man tips for the masses?”

Even Karkat seemed surprised by the laughter abruptly bursting from him. “Something like that,” he said once he’d recovered. “You work as a DJ at the Glass, right?”

Honestly, Dave was shocked. He’d been sure Karkat had been just tuning him out! Then again, he had remembered he was from Texas, too. Maybe he just always looked bored and pissed off. “Yeah. It’s not super steady, but it pays the bills.” It actually didn’t pay the bills; Rose’s mom (his mom, she was also his mom) sent him money every month to pay for the apartment and various other expenses. However, his sad family history wasn’t exactly third date material. “You ever been?”

Karkat leveled Dave with a skeptical look which seemed to indicate his estimation of Dave’s intelligence had started low and was only getting lower. “Do I look like the kind of person that would get past a bouncer? Are you actually visually impaired, or are you making fun of me?” He shook his head. “I can see myself in the mirror, jackass; I know what I look like. Stop pretending I’m,” he held up his hands to make the finger quotes, ‘hot’.”

“I’m insulted you would think I’d lie about your hotness. You’re a fucking rooftop in the middle of a Texas summer. I should know; I’ve been there.” The metaphor stirred up memories Dave didn’t want to think about, and he wrapped an arm around Karkat’s shoulder. He immediately wished he’d done it sooner. “Anyway, I’ve already told you, you are a snack. You might as well accept it. It’s obvious. Everyone with eyes can see it. Not you, for some reason, but everyone else.”

“That’s just not true, Dave.” Before he could contest this, Karkat continued, “Most blind people still have eyes, idiot, and they can’t see anything, let alone support your dubious assertion that I’m attractive.” The words practically dripped with sarcasm even as he settled into Dave’s half-embrace. “You’re being so fucking insensitive right now.”

“Oh, shit, you’re right.” The part of Dave not worrying about the words flowing out of his mouth registered how nice and warm Karkat felt under his arm and pressed against his side. “Well, if they got to feel you up, they’d agree you were a snack, too. So, checkmate, Karkat. Check fucking mate. You’re just going to have to accept it. Majority vote. You’re a snack.”

Karkat looked up. “If you tell me you want to eat me, I’m leaving now and blocking your chumhandle.” Then his gaze shifted away. “This is nice,” he said, his voice softer than Dave had thought he was capable of. Maybe it was Dave’s burgeoning hearing loss, but he sounded… sad.

While Dave wanted to ask why he sounded so sad, he figured Karkat would tell him if he wanted him to know. After all, they still hadn’t known each other for very long yet. What was needed was a distraction, and Dave had just the thing to cheer both of them up. “If you think this is nice, you should be super excited for our date.”

---

Karkat had been feeling guilty again. It really had been nice, sitting on that bench in front of that giant art installation, to pretend that there was actually some sort of future for them. For him and Dave. Together. So, he’d been feeling guilty—even if he was an idiot who talked too much, Dave wasn’t a bad guy, and he didn’t deserve what Karkat planned on putting him through.

At least, that’s what Karkat had been thinking until they’d arrived at their final destination.

“A karaoke bar?” Karkat felt a scowl furrow his brow, and he turned it onto Dave, who had the audacity to be grinning at him. “It might interest you to know that I can’t fucking sing.”

Dave shrugged. “No one can at these places, Karkat. That’s why it’s fun.” He pushed his glasses down his nose, allowing Karkat the briefest glimpse of his eyes before he pushed them up again. “You’ve had fun before right? Or do we have to go slow and ease you into it, because fun is a hotel pool with a broken heater, and you haven’t raided the mini-bar yet.”

“Of course I know what fun is, you festering anal wart.” He saw himself ranting reflected in the lenses of Dave’s stupid glasses and looked away. “Fun is a walk in the park, or watching a movie, or going on a picnic, or playing a game. Fun is not embarrassing yourself in front of dozens of strangers by subjecting them to what can only laughingly be called your singing voice!” He started at the unexpected hand on his shoulder but made no move to shrug it off.

“Hey,” Dave said quietly, “if you really don’t want to be here, we can do something else. I don’t really know what you like yet outside of chick flicks. And writing for a magazine. And coming up with creative insults for me.” His grip on Karkat’s shoulder tightened slightly. “Help me out here, Karkat; I’m drowning with only seconds left to live. You’re the hot lifeguard, and I’m gonna need your sweet lips on mine fairly soon, or else I’m leaving the beach in a body bag. And no one wants that.”

Karkat turned back to face Dave. There were so many things to unpack in this latest offering of word vomit that he wasn’t even going to make the attempt. “Do you ever actually listen to the things you say?”

“I try not to,” Dave said blithely. “Messes with my flow.” Then the smile faded. “I mean it, though. If you want to go somewhere else, we totally can. I don’t have my heart set on this place; I just thought it’d be fun. Maybe you’d loosen up a little.”

“I am exactly as loose as I want to be,” Karkat sniped back, tacitly admitting that now he was the one saying stupid things. As much as he wanted to make things difficult for Dave for the sake of his article, he really couldn’t deny being touched that Dave was willing to change his plans because Karkat had complained about them.

Besides, while Karkat could be (and often was) loudly unpleasant and vulgar, it wasn’t the kind of thing he could force. He had to feel it. And he wasn’t feeling it. “No, we can stay. Just are there private rooms?”

Dave was frowning, perhaps in displeasure, perhaps in thought. “We can check.”

---

It turned out that there were private rooms, but they were prohibitively expensive. If this had been something Karkat had really wanted to do, Dave would have shelled out the cash, but he’d known he’d made the right call to spend the date elsewhere when he’d given Karkat the verdict and his shoulders had immediately relaxed.

Although Karkat had also protested that he wasn’t much better at bowling than he was at singing, he’d seemed less agitated about the prospect. He’d actually smiled a little when Dave had confided that he, too, wasn’t much of a bowler. Dave also wasn’t much of a drinker, but when Karkat offered to buy him a beer, he’d accepted it.

Dave was currently sipping his apple? flavored ale from the chair in their section of the alley and watching Karkat lob yet another ball down the gutter. This made, what? the tenth in a row? Dave had managed via blind luck to hit a strike with his first shot—a feat he had not been able to repeat—and that had pissed Karkat off like nothing else. Each additional failure to even get his ball any closer to hitting any of the pins only made Karkat’s face redder.

The only question was when he was going to pop.

“FUCK!” Karkat stomped back to the ball return. “FUCK ME, FUCK BOWLING, AND FUCK YOU, DAVE. YOU THINK YOU’RE BETTER THAN ME? NEWSFLASH, FUCK FACE, YOU ARE JUST AS OBJECTIVELY TERRIBLE AT THIS AS I AM—AT LEAST *I* HAVE THE FUCKING DECENCY TO BE ASHAMED OF MYSELF!”

Dave made absolutely no attempt to hold back his laughter.

“Hey, do you mind watching your language?” An older man in the next lane was giving Karkat quite an impressive glare. “There are kids present.”

Karkat’s face went purple.

---

“Well, Karkat,” Dave said as they walked down the street to no stated destination, his tone infuriatingly casual, “I can honestly say I’ve never been kicked out of a bowling alley before. I can scratch that off the old bucket list. It wasn’t on there because I hadn’t thought of it, but now I see I was blind to the possibilities. Thanks for opening my third eye or some shit like that.”

Karkat had let Dave put his stupid arm around his shoulders about a block back, and he hated the fact it felt so comforting. Bad enough he’d made an ass out of himself over nothing in public (again!), but it hadn’t even worked. He’d wanted to piss Dave off by showcasing his abhorrent personality, and he’d failed miserably. It wasn’t even his fault he’d failed either. For some inscrutible fucking reason, the idiot found temper tantrums hilarious to watch rather than embarrassing to be associated with. “Fuck you, Dave,” he said quietly, his energy quite spent.

Dave chuckled. Case in fucking point. “Aw come on, don’t be like that. It’s not like we’re banned from the place.” He paused. “I’m probably not going to get you to go there again anyway, am I?”

“I am never stepping foot back into that establishment, no.”

“Are you still pissed at me for that strike?” Dave’s voice sounded disbelieving. Maybe a little hurt. “I told you, man, it was a fluke. I wasn’t trying to hustle you. If I’d wanted to hustle you, there’d be money involved. That’s how that shit works. It’s like the definition of a hustle.”

Karkat sighed. “No, I’m not mad about that.” He hadn’t really been that mad about it in the bowling alley either. He’d just been frustrated. Loudly. Which was how he usually expressed his frustration. In the moment, it made him feel better… afterwards, he just felt tired. “I’m just really fucking embarrassed, okay? I know embarrassment is probably a foreign concept for you, but—”

Then he was being hugged. He tensed for a moment, then relaxed into it. He knew he shouldn’t be accepting Dave’s comfort, that this was only going to make things harder in the long run, but he couldn’t help himself. He really was such a selfish asshole. His head fell naturally against Dave’s shoulder, and he felt a distressingly familiar ache in his eyes. “Why are you hugging me?”

A soft guff of laughter blew past his ear. “Dude, you looked like you needed a hug. I’m not a hug expert or anything, but sometimes you look at a guy and think, that guy, he needs a hug.” The arms around him held him just a little tighter. “I hope you leave me a good review on yelp.”

Karkat choked on his unexpected laughter. “Dave. You are so fucking ridiculous.” As much as a part of him wanted to remain in his arms, he knew if he stayed any longer, he really would start crying. “Let go of me, asshole.”

Dave did so with only a moment’s hesitation. He put his hands on his hips. “So, what do you think?”

“About what?” Karkat successfully resisted the urge to wipe his eyes. With any luck, Dave wouldn’t notice how tear bright they probably were. Why was he getting so emotional anyway? None of this would matter soon enough.

“My review,” Dave said as though Karkat should have any idea what he was talking about. “Five out of five stars, right? Don’t crash my yelp score, dude—I have a reputation to maintain as hug master supreme; it’s all I have.”

And Karkat was laughing again. It really felt good.

---

* Gives nice hugs. Doesn’t respect personal space. Karaoke bar? Shitty bowler. Why isn’t this working?

---

{{ The third step is the ego. For Dr. Freud (famous psychology hack), the ego was a moderator. For our purposes, we return to the original Latin: I. Make it all about you and your comfort. If you have had enough of your short-term partner’s incessant prattle, say so. When you want to scream, do it at the top of your lungs. Use whatever language feels best to you at all times regardless of the situation. Make your short-term partner embarrassed to be associated with you. If you can get you and your short-term partner kicked out of an establishment due to your behavior, so much the better. However, if you find that such antics only serve to amuse your short-term partner, cease them immediately. The point of this exercise is to humiliate your short-term partner, not further endear you to them. Also, in the event that you are more embarrassed by your conduct than your short-term partner is, under no circumstances allow them to comfort you. It will only distract you from your objective. }}

[ghilan-maim]

i’m having them biracial blues and this is 100% a rant about my life written in some weird ass...i dont know man, i got up in my feelings and it’s hardly coherent but

gif credit, cuz i couldn't get it in the actual gif adder thing

i dont think ill ever forget schoolyard taunts about my thick, black body hair. or that my eyes were demonic because if the light didn’t shine just right, they could almost be black. or that my eyebrows were too big and oh they can see a little bit of hair connecting between them. i never forgot when the girls who were supposed to be my friends started calling me broccoli nose because it’s wider than theirs, you see. or when the boy i had a crush on and a boy who’d always been my friend decided that instead of friend, i should be their yard workers or maids or harvesting their food but its funny ha ha cuz that’s what mexicans do! i wont forget that my hair was boring and why is there so much of it? why is it frizzy? “because i dont have that problem!” said the girl with strawberry hair. and the color! black, but just shy of the inkiness that is beautiful.

i won’t forget that my skin was brown or that the little girl i ran into at toys-r-us, excited and chatty because she’s a friend i thought, walked away with her mother berating “you didn’t tell me she was mexican!” as i stand next to my red-haired, light skinned cousin. i wont forget that no one could say my name proper and it was never worth the effort to try and it didn’t matter if they’d known me for years because it was too foreign on their tongue and it didn’t matter. but heaven forbid i didnt properly pronounce theirs because “its not that hard!!!!” it’s only hard when its attached to someone like me, right? even when it comes from europeans just the same, forced onto my people like the blood of theirs in my veins as a result of their violence.

i’ll never forget thinking my abuser of seven years was so beautiful, right to the very end. i wont forget being eight years old and fighting against fear every time i saw her but going all the same because she was all golden hair and ocean eyes and certainly that means shes good. even as she tells me to shave my hands, my stomach, get rid of the nasty hair that makes me look like an ape. even as she tells me my mouth is too big, my lips look like they’ve been stung. i suppose we are taught, then, from youth to see beauty in our aggressors. for how lucky we are, just to be in their presence. i felt that, in some obscure way. desperately and with all of my being i felt that and hoped and prayed and wished that i could be her.

that i could look like her. it was all i wanted, to look like her because maybe then the world would look at me and see something pretty. something worthy of love. beautiful, and good in all the ways i was told - even without words - that i couldnt be. something worthwhile.

i wanted to look like the mom who raised me. the one i wanted to be perfect for even when she never asked me to be, never even implied it. because to her, i already was. she always told me i was beautiful. braided my hair and kissed my cheek and told me all the things i got from my family that lived across the country, some still in mexico, and why it was such a beautiful thing. do you know what it’s like, that the person who sees you as a treasure is the one no one would ever connect you to? to go out with your mom and your two friends, and people are shocked to hear that youre her child and not the blue eyed blondes? even with her brown hair and hazel eyes and no features to share besides, it was more believable that they were her daughters rather than you.

their only similarity being the color of their skin and yet the message is clear even if you can’t articulate it: you couldn’t possibly be from her, someone who belongs to the group that sets the standard for beauty and worthiness.

that wasn’t me, brown skinned and dark haired and with every feature that runs strong in my papa’s family. my tia said it herself, when i was born. “oh julie, im so sorry. she has the family nose” because she knew, too. my beautiful tia who has no need for shame and she knew that my moms whiteness couldn’t protect me because their features showed full force in me, left no place for my mom’s family to show itself.

i wont forget that the world told me from day one that i was less than. i would always be less than. it’s awful funny, that i lost my love of the outdoors when i first heard that it darkened you. no more summer days spent in the pool, fingers pruning but refusing to get out. no more bike rides, gone in the morning and returned by dinner. no more outdoors karaoke or baton twirling in the driveway. the tree i once loved is abandoned and the branches i’d climbed till i couldn’t any longer grow weak and lonely with time, missing the child who’d settle in and fall asleep in its branches. the warmth of the sun was something i deprived myself of for years with only the wishes of lightening my skin, getting rid of just one of the many things that separated me from everything i thought i should be.

but i found that it didn’t matter how pale i became. because, you see, it’s not a lightness that indicates whiteness. its an “i havent seen sunlight in a year” kind, one that doesn’t fool many and never for long. and how could it? my name would betray my heritage even if my features didn’t.

at twenty-eight, i still havent recovered. i havent learned how to live under the sun again. i havent learned to rediscover that kid that would wait for the weekend and the adventures it’d bring, step outside my door and into the sunlight and stay there in the world, under the heat of the sun until it started retreat into the night.

i wont forget that all expectations of me were based around what i looked like, what they saw in my name. how surprising it was, that i might know things. how unexpected it was, that i understood anything. after all, how could i deign to perform better than some of the other girls, the ones that were expected to go places when it was quite clear where most people expected me to end up.

it didn’t take long, for anger to show itself because it was easier to show that than shame, sadness. it’s strange, that at twelve, a black girl calling me a “white bitch” was offensive for the first part rather than the last. white...white....the thing i wanted to be and yet i was angry when she called me that. angry even if i didnt understand why, at the time. but i do now. i understand the fury in my bones at that moment when she pushed me and i swung back, a kid noted for being quiet and well behaved because i couldnt believe that she saw that.

that because i was not darker then my struggle did not matter. that because i did not look like her, then my disadvantage didn’t exist. the one thing id yearned to be a part of felt like a fist to the gut to be sided with because...i wasn’t. it was the first time i realized that maybe there wasn’t a place for me. that i’d be doomed to be too white for all the people who could empathize with my struggles and too brown for all the people who’d been a source of them.

and it only got worse when people would thing, for appearance, that it was better. but its not a compliment to be fifteen and having a guy hit on you because he “likes them spicy” wink-wink, nudge-nudge. it’s not a compliment when someone wants you to be his spicy hot tamale. even when the things that were detriments about me aged into something desirable, it was twisted and tainted and never felt like anything close to acceptance.

and then....and then to get out of all of it, all those moments that tore me down and made me ashamed to be who i am and realize the beauty in my features, in my wide nose and big lips and dark hair all over my body. to learn to love these features that mark me as part of a people with a history so rich and roots so deep into the soil of this continent...to learn these things and fight against all those ideas and people who ever made me feel otherwise and then be told that it is not my place. that it isn’t true, what i said. that i am pale and so that means i am white and i don’t know racism because my mom is white.

it’s a unique thing, to be biracial, and i dont think people talk about that enough. one foot in one history, the other in another. both but not enough for either to accept you. and i know that truth, too. i remember family gatherings with my moms family. i remember feeling always like my brother and i were julie’s little mistakes. oh sure the words were not spoken but in a sea of white people who married white people and had white children...the contrast makes you aware.

aware that you are not a fit. aware that they will love you only if you never bring up your papa, never bring up the aggression against you simply for existing as a product of love and understanding between people from such different worlds. little whispers about your papa that you wont understand for years as your mom shakes her head no, no, he’s a good man because her love has never gone. changed, perhaps, from what it was. but steadfast and true. they criticize him for his drug problem but she tells of a man who always took responsibility for his failings, always admitted his wrongs, never harmed a hair on our heads.

a good man who is sick but a good man nonetheless.

both, but never fully one or the other. and they let you know that, too. even the ones you’d thought all your life were the few that accepted you fully. but then you argue, you fight to defend your people against the new husband of a cousin you loved so much. the anger...the anger feels like a heart about to explode because it isn’t all anger. its fear and sadness and hurt and the anger is what you grasp onto, inflate as you stand shaking to take a breath, get distance before a panic attack has set in. you do that a lot in life.

and you hate crying but you sit on the front porch doing it anyways. your mom knows better than to follow but your aunts dont. so they come and they talk and they try to ask whats upsetting because well we were talking politics, people don’t always agree.and you scream, voice breaking “he’s talking about my people!” because how could you have ever identified with whiteness? but you don’t find understanding or comfort. only your favorite aunt, the one you loved for so many years, the one you thought accepted you no matter what, says with just as much passion: “we’re your people!”

and you realize, in your mid-twenties after a lifetime of being mistaken, that the acceptance is only if you throw away a part of yourself. that only if you will forget your mexican half do you matter. that they would prefer to forget you’re not white because how can they possibly love you if you arent?

it’s a lonely thing, too. because your papa is sick and he did not do right by you in the all right ways. and you spend your childhood missing him, wanting to live with him because living with mom is too painful if that’s what it will be like. but it bitters, too. childish ignorance cant last forever and for years you are angry, furious, refusing to see his sickness as that and instead as a choice he made.

he chose to leave you. to stay with a woman who looks like him, to create a child who belongs. one who learns his native language and gets all that you dont. the good and the bad. it....hurts, that the first words your little brother says to you are in a language you cant understand because your father...he lived far away for so long and where else could you learn when your mom can’t speak it, either? he’s three and spanish will be his first language and age will bring anger that this is so when your attempts through your life just never seem to work.

you just cant seem to make the words right. they feel wrong on your tongue and youre sure it’d make anyone who knows the language laugh.

people often dont get why i am offended by being called white. because well, im not, for one. sure, my skin is pale but my features are not those of a white person. to reduce it to that is so offensive when my experience has been lived as a person of color. it’s rare that people assume i’m white. and yea, it makes me mad when they do.

because i haven’t benefited from whiteness. i have never been treated as it. ive noticed people treat me poorly by my name alone, before they’ve even seen me. my MOTHER has noticed this. she kept my fathers name and she’s told me before appointments made at new places, she is often regarded more rudely but when she shows up and they see her whiteness, it changes.

for me, though, the biggest indicator is that other mexicans seem to....know. its a blessing and a curse. its adorable when little mexican kids come up to me, start trying to say something in spanish. it makes me feel this...wanting. to be a part of that culture, to learn more that i havent been able to because im across the world from everyone who was meant to connect me to it. but it hurts, too, because its another realization of my defect.

that i am a part of them, but only partly. and not everyone is so kind. some will see my distance from my heritage as sign enough that im not a part of it at all.

this...really got away from me and honestly, i dont even feel like ive really scratched the surface. this wasn’t meant to be a “poor me” but to be honest.....just because people have it worse than i do, and i KNOW they do, doesn’t make my suffering less significant.

so much in my life i have been told my people of color that i cant say anything and i have no right to it and this and that and whatever because my skin is pale. some try to make me say im white passing if i must engage but you know what...fuck that

if i was white passing, this post wouldn’t exist.

[nepnops]

ok so @capriast asked me to do the bottom half of the all of the questions from the “questions for lgbt ladies #lgbtask” bc a bottom is what i am (her words not mine). so here we go. 

45. Have you and a girlfriend ever been mistaken for sisters?

nope,

46. Do you carry a purse?

nahh. i have a reebok side bag that i use often

47. Have you ever wished you were completely straight?

HAH no. i like women too much.

48. Do you watch any lesbian YouTubers?

strictly lesbian? ally hills on occasion. but an lgbt youtuber i really like is anima gaming.

49. Do you like wearing combat boots or Doc Martins?

i’d wear both if i owned them. 

50. Have you ever been hit on by another female?

its hard to tell, when a girl is hitting on me or not. being hit on could just be read as a simple compliment by me. so not sure. maybe. idk.

51. How athletic are you?

AH HA. this question just reminded me i should work out more. 

52. How many girlfriends have you had?

one. or uh two? its a lil complicated? 

53. What is your opinion of septum/bull nose piercings?

they’re ight. u do u. 

54. Do you have any opinions on LGBT people in the military?

not really. 

55. Do you believe in love at first sight?

no. infatuation at first sight, yes.

56. Have you ever shared clothes with a girlfriend?

i would have stole sweaters if my ex and i were not long distance.

57. Have you ever been on your period the same time as a girlfriend?

i think so.

58. How flirty are you?

nnnnn if the girl is flirty back i am a flirt machine

59. Are you a virgin?

.........yes

60. Do you listen to any LGBT musicians such as Tegan and Sara, Melissa Etheridge, or Chely Wright?

lmfao who r those ppl? never heard of them. i love hayley kiyoko tho. OH and pvris. p sure they count since lynn gunn is gay.

61. Have you ever been told that you are too pretty to be gay?

yea from my mom

62. Have you ever used or would you ever want to use a dildo?

sure i’d want to, why not

63. Have you ever used or would you ever want to use a strap-on?

sure again. listen. despite what @capriast said abt me being a bottom, i’d try wearin a strap on. i can be a switch if i WANNA. 

64. Is there such a thing as “good” lesbian porn?

ya

65. Have you ever had a one night stand?

no

66. Agree or disagree: Everyone is at least a little bit gay.

disagree. 

67. What personality trait are you most attracted to?

confidence, probs. or quirkiness. 

68. Boobs or butts?

uh. boobs i think. not like humongous ones tho. 

69. Beer or wine?

BEEEEEER

70. What is your favorite lesbian movie?

i dont think i’ve watched one. 

71. Have you ever been personally discriminated against because of your sexuality? If so, please explain.

dont think so. my father has strongly implied that if we knew i was gay he’d kick me outta the house. so theres that. 

72. From 1-10, how attractive are muscular women?

10000000 i love strong women holy shit, fuck me up

73. From 1-10, how attractive are women who wear glasses?

10, they cute

74. From 1-10, how attractive are women who are covered with tattoos?

9. hawt

75. From 1-10, how attractive are curvy/plus-size women?

im not too into curvy women tbh

76. From 1-10, how attractive are women with short hair?

8, v noice

77. From 1-10, how attractive are masculine butch women?

7, i’m more attracted to futch girls like me but butch gals r cool

78. Has a girl ever dumped you for a guy?

nope

79. Lesbian couples tend to look alike. Why do you think that is?

this concept goes for gay and hetero couples too, not just lesbian. but idk. i think theres some science behind it.

80. Do you have any LGBT relatives?

i have like, 4 gay aunts, a gay uncle, and gay cousin on my moms side lol.

82. Would you ever date a trans girl?

ye sure!

83. How has being out affected your relationship with women, in general?

not by much. i have good friends that accept me for who i am so not much has changed. just lotsa gay jokes. 

84. Have you ever had a crush on a woman who’s much older than you?

nah

85. Do you have any celebrity crushes?

they’re not crushes really. just woman that make my heart go “HHHFHFHGH” yknow? 

86. What does equality mean to you?

being, treated equality? is this supposed to be a trick question? 

87. If you could live your life all over again, would you still be attracted to other women?

probably

88. What stereotype about LGBT women do you disagree with the most?

that lgbt women tend to cheat a lot. what a horrible and negative thing to say abt a group of people. 

89. What advice would you give a girl who is struggling to figure out her sexuality?

u may hop from label to label from just tryna categorize ur sexuality. and thats completely okay. you will understand urself someday, no need to rush anything. find friends who will support u no matter what.

90. What advice would you give a girl who is struggling to come out?

dont come out if u arent sure you’ll be safe afterwards. if ur sure u will be ok after coming out, come out to the person one on one, while they’re driving a car. apparently thats better bc ur not forced to make eye contact with the person and the person has to keep their chill bc they’re driving a car. so yea. 

OK IM DONE @capriast not doing this many questions at once AGAIN

[captainjellyroll]

IM GONNA try this thing where ppl answer asks in bulk or smth??? idk- LETS GO!!

these are all asks that i got (when i asked for ppl to tell me any personality flaws i have; so i can become a better person) aaaand truthfully, i thought i was gonna get a few weird ones (aka mean ones). but, i consider myself a pretty open-minded person, so i took any asks that i got w/ a grain of salt bwahaha

i know none of these have the intention of being a personal attack, so none of these offend me in any way. i really do appreciate the feedback from y’all, it helps a lot!!

truthfully-- they are all very sweet and more nicer “roasts” than anything. if anything else; they seem more like compliments (which i dont mind, but wasnt what i was really looking for-- i guess i was kinda looking for harsher reality checks but instead i got these haha). but nonetheless, i am grateful for these, so thank you!

lets get into the nitty-gritty, shall we~? (more under the cut if it interests you LOL)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

disclaimer: i realize that most of my answers may sound like im being defensive, but i do take any critiques to heart. i am 100% listening to you guys and learning. but i do have some points id like to further explain or debunk. i hope you understand!!

aaaaand w/o further ado;; lets do this..!! //cracks fingers

1) i appreciate you read my FAQ haha. but what you are implying is that i DONT go to any friends for help. or that i even HAVE friends irl to begin with. i think you assume that i come to tumblr to vent all the time, when in truth-- tumblr is one of my last resort places i go to vent. i start with online friends who seem to care enough, then i make my way to my private twitter if i need to. i DO go to other people first who have some impact on me, and most of the time i DO NOT vent here. but when i do-- it means im at my last resort. i dont have any “irl friends” to go to. all of my medical help is in california. i have literally no where to turn to besides the internet.

when i vent here- 9/10 im just screaming into the void hoping someone will give me validation or sympathy. im not asking for any real help besides for someone to listen. thats all. if i need more, i will mention it. if not-- just listening helps me. thats all.

2) i would like for you to further explain what this means?? or if this is referencing to smth i said? again, i would like to consider myself a very open-minded or reasonable person, and im always changing and growing, whether it be in opinions or viewpoints. i think as a human, we evolve as we live on. idk, im re-reading this one over and over and i cant seem to see what you are trying to say. sorry!!

3) i agree with this one the most. i feel like if im too arrogant of my work, i will never get better. but.... i do admit that im getting to that point where i dislike what i do so much so that i dont enjoy it. and thats a really shitty feeling, lemme tell ya... so, ill try and love myself more-- but i dont believe at all that im a good artist. maybe decent, but im no top tier. i WANT to be there, and i WANT to be able to stand side-by-side w/ my senpais and truely believe i belong there, but... i dont see it. and i can admit that im not a perfect artist. i might be overrated, tbh. thats just my personal feelings on it. everyone’s eyes are different, and in my eyes, im not anything special. and im not being humble either, i really believe that. YOU may see that im pretty good, but other people may not. you get me?

but, thank you for saying so. <3

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

ALRIGHTY folks thats enough rambling for today-- again, thank you for these asks, ill definitely think about them c:

[lycanrox]

response to aidens post lol

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection if-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out. gonna copy nd paste then post my response ok cool

-Guilt trip and gaslight when you thought I was going to get with someone else, people making compliments towards me got you into a rage fit. You never apologized for always getting pissed when I never did shit and you take compliments all the time. 

i never tried to guilt trip. i told you many times its ok to get with someone else. you literally dated someone else and i was ok with it. it wasnt compliments i was upset over, you literally had people saying they were in love with you. thats really weird to me. i was scared to be abandoned. people dont compliment me, all i have is my boyfriend and my qpp. maybe my close friends compliment me but its not a big deal. did i freak out over ur friends calling u daddy and shit? why should u get upset over people doing that to me?

-Manipulating everyone to know only your side, ignoring my sincere apologies, calling them bullshit, ignoring the fact that I never did those things again and told you to call me out. You barely did, but I did always stop when you told me to.

literally i already said. He sat there with me as youd text me and fight with me. you went to Her, my fp, to complain about me without telling her my side. everyone who ive talked to has seen all of it. i give people my phone and let them read everything since even before we broke up. im not scared to show my side. 

-Controlling me, telling me to do everything and give you love all the time and you literally did that all the time. “I hate myself I want to die”, was that not manipulation, when I always try to comfort you? But, you pushed me away and said you never asked. I was extremely supportive in your times of misery and self harm, what have you ever done for me?

how did i control you? i didnt tell you to do shit. saying “love me” as a joke isnt controlling. i wanted attention, god forbid. you do the same to me. “i hate myself i want to die” is literally just me self loathing, how is that manipulation??? i was venting to you because i trust you. i appreciated the comfort but yes i never wanted help. help is not what i want, i dont want to be in the hospital, i dont want to be put on new meds, i dont want a support group i just want to feel less alone.

-Calling me abusive for literally nothing, for “months” I have apparently abused you when A) I never fucking harmed you, a gentle push I guess which I thoroughly apologized for, but nah it’s all bullshit according to you and B) You have done manipulative and abusive things to me like: Forcing me to do things with you, making me have to kiss you within the first 5 days because you were so sad, trying to talk sexually to me when I was not ready but I got into it because that is what YOU wanted, exhausting my limits to how much you wanted from me, expecting me to love on you and care for you when you are always talking about how many feelings you have for someone else, putting me into a poly relationship without my consent the second time, always having some shit to complain about because I cannot be perfect, pinning me against my friends, and the list goes on.

if like 10 different people are calling you abusive its probably true, dude. you did harm me. you ignored the fact i literally said you punched me. you never apologized for that. i was fucking upset over it and you just sat there and watchd me tear up and curl in a ball. you tried to fucking excuse yourself for it. “I deal with things irrationally, I live in a family that physically hits each other, and it was a blur I cannot just stop and think. I did not blame him for being scared? I said it isn’t my fault and it doesn’t mean I havent gone through things either.” literal quote from you. “...it was aggressive but gentle...” another literal quote. 

i never forced you to. in fact it was always you texting me about how horny you are, you made an nsfw blog so i could see the shit you put on there, you were the first person to make sexual advances. i told you i get sex repulsed sometimes and you apparently dont even remember that because at least 3 times a week you talked to me about being horny and what was i supposed to do? you would be at my house and tell me how much you wanted to fuck, you said literally “i cant wait for after-prom sex” and i didnt let you stay the night because of that. you were the one who always wanted sex. i never forced you to do anything, you were the one who touched me without consent. i didnt make you kiss me. before we were even dating you talked about kissing me all the time. you asked me to teach you how to kiss, so yeah like .. 5 days after we started dating you spent the night and we kissed like 3 times. it wasnt that big of a deal. you asked for it. the first time we sexually talked all i said was i wanted to give you hickeys and you asked to sext, so we did. 

poly relationship w/o consent? when we first started dating i was already dating oliver. when we broke up, again, i was dating oliver so when you ASKED ME OUT again you knew i was still with them. no force. when did i ever pin you against your friends? the only person i ever said shit abt was p**** because he was getting too obsessive when you were uncomfy, and you encouraged me to do that.

-You made me believe that all I was ever doing was WRONG, and I have told you that five trillion times, and you never did anything to help that. I know I was not wrong for trying to be supportive even though I was triggered to death, but you made me feel like I was a fucking nuisance in your life.

how??? i did everything i could to tell you how great of a boyfriend you were. i told you every day how much i loved you. how perfect you were. i didnt do shit, you were the one who made me feel like shit every day because i wasnt physically or mentally able to suit your romantic needs. 

-Blaming me for all your damn mistakes, I got defensive because it was never me, blaming me for being paranoid when you did things and hinted at things to provoke that, and your paranoia was never apologized for either. Even in the beginning, I apologized for being paranoid and it took a long ass time for that to come back because you are so unpredictable and you were never clear with any of the things you said. 

yes i admit i have trouble owning up to my own mistakes. im sorry that i blamed you for things. you dont deserve that. im mature enough to own up and apologize for that. i dont know what i did to make you paranoid but im sorry that that happened. i am unpredictable. i know. yikes at me

-Vaguely saying you did some things wrong too but hiding behind your illnesses as well, not even asking me what you could have done better. You want the cold hard truth? You are getting it. Yes, I was supportive of what you had and I guess I am ableist for trying to help you to change. I WAS SO ABLEIST for wanting the absolute bare minimum. You already said we were just becoming friends at that stage, and the fact of the matter is, you hurt the shit out of me.

i try not to hide behind my illnesses but i really cant help some things because of my illnesses. i tried asking what i could do. i tried doing what you wanted. you are ableist tbqh because i told you i COULDNT DO THE THINGS YOU WANTED but you pushed me every day to fucking do it and when i broke down and apoligzed for not being able to do it you made me feel like ABSOLUTE SHIT!!! i was the worst bf ever bc i cant do some romantic things sometimes!!!!! yikes im so problematic for being disabled!!

-You become avoidant to self harm and don’t fucking apologize for pushing people away. You always told me you were here for me when I needed help but you never actually listened to me. I never jumped straight into things, sorry if you believe that. I always said I was feeling terrible and you decided to expand.

i dont have to apologize for pushing people away if its whats best for me mentally. i am 100% sure in that. i always ask whats wrong because i care about you but when i dont know what youre going to say its a 50/50 chance ill get triggered and if im triggered i cant really think properly!! i get flashbacks and anxiety attacks when i see even specfic words. ive told you before its not great to depend on me for that stuff. that im always here for you but im here to listen, not to help. i cant help myself, how can i help you?

-Saying you were fine all the time, lying to me when something was wrong, I always had to find out from someone else about what you have done.

wow yikes i didnt tell you when i felt shitty because i didnt want to trigger you. yikes because i dont want your help or advice sometimes. i want people to listen but you never JSUT listen you have some styff to say and while some ppl like that i dont!! i dont like being told how to think or feel or what to do

-Abusing your medications and getting high when I first broke up with you, saying you got dumped, implying you didn’t deserve it when you never deserved me. I spent over $200 dollars on your boyfriend’s medical bills, but I am careless and unkind I suppose.

i was already abusing my medications :-/ i never called you careless or unkind but ok

-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out.

what did i ever do to make you feel not good enough lol. not do the things i said before i cant do? i didnt use your body, not once not ever. dont even start that shit. you know my history of rape and sexual abuse. what the actual fuck. 

-Again, since you cannot get it through your selfish mind, you never owned up for ANYTHING you have done, and guess what? I only do what people do to me. So, you treating me bad, I tried to forgive you and become collected, but you pushed me to where I thought I was stuck in the relationship. Why? Because if I left, you would become suicidal, if you left, you would want to come back immediately.

i tried owning up to things and ive apologized for many things i shouldnt have had to. tbqh ive wanted to break up since like.. right after prom bc the way you were being so i wouldnt have been suicidal if you left. yeah i wouldve been upset if i left because its hard for me to detach myself from people

You have no idea what you did, you have no idea what you were doing.

lol u rite

People defending your disgusting actions are no better than you are, you only exclude what you have done to make yourself seem innocent. 

people excusing you for hitting me and sexually abusing me and manipulating and gaslighting me are worse than people supporting me. i was maybe bad to you to combat myself from you hurting me!! i dont want to fucking get hurt again so when you do something shitty i have to do something shitty in return! 

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection 

you asked me out both times. 

I asked you all the damn time if you wanted space, but you said “No, it’s fine,” when you damn well knew it wasn’t. Why are you such a blatant liar?

i didnt want to hurt you by leaving you alone.

Oh and also, when you “broke up” with your boyfriend of two years for me, but always texting endearing things to them when we were together, how cute of you to do that.

we did break up. yeah i fucking missed them though. its hard for me to detach. but i wasnt seeing them behind your back. you know very well it was sho who was dating oliver, not me. i text them endearing things because theyre my fp/dp and i love them. 

anything abusive ive done i literally didnt mean to do. youre the one whos just now pushing all this shit on me. dont accuse me of being abusive when you didnt tell me when these things made you upset. i didnt fucking know. i cant read minds. i cant do any of that shit. i also dont have empathy and cant think of other peoples emotions so its hard for me to think about how/if my actions are affecting people, unless they fuckign tell me. which you didnt. instead, you just told me how fucking shitty i was. i was an awful boyfriend, im using you, im cheating, im not good enough, i cant satisfy you. i guess i was so bad you just had to start dating that other guy, and as you said, because “he can give you things i cannot give”. jeez im so FUCKING sorry.

[adickktedtoyou]

hihi i miss you you should answer all multiples of 2 !!

geez u go hard. short answers 4 u.

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

nope

4 - answered

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

probably eliza, maybe tori as well. I don’t really get drunk after the night i threw up like 10 times tho.

8- answered

10: What are you listening to?

the whooshing noise of my overheating laptop.

12: Do you like hickeys?

idrk but i think im leaning no?

14- answered

16- answered

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

everyday bc shes my roommate

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

‘ugh i have to wake up at 8.’

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

yep absolutely.

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

yea...

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

sweatshirt: dark blue. im not wearing a shirt atm.

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

if they are they should ignore me louder because im not getTING THE MEMO.

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

i think im over it at this point, but maybe

32: Are you mad at anyone?

im always at least a little irritated with at least one person so i’ll say: yes but only a little.

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

20? 21? around my age.

36- answered

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

not intentionally but im not good at keeping track of these things so maybe

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

i dont wanna lie so im gonna oPT OUT.

42- answered

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

asuhaurthe tbh earrings hurt a lot and i had a lot of trouble w infection so they ended up closing up so im scared of piercings but septum.

46: Do you regret anything?

yes? is there anyone who doesnt? can they teach me how to live my life?

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

yep still kinda salty

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

bc im a fuckin baby but also like idk if i acTUALLY LIKE them strongly enough like i dont know them that well itsmore like a hmm maybe i could like you.

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

nope. such is my life.

54: Did you get any compliments today?

nope. such is my life.

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

yes! my mom is belgian so like. i have tons of random shit from europe.

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

the -not always so- good ol’ USA

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

neuuuu

62: Who do you text the most?

hmm christine, eliza, tori, marisa, or noemi. tho its not text its fb message. actual texting would be francine probably.

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

their lack of existing on the material plane.

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

nah.

68: Are you happy with where you live?

yes! at home home and school home. tho my home town has like nOTHING in it despite it being HUGE and dense. like its all residential or restaurants and its boring. its p close to a lot of cool stuff though so thats nice.

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

monogamous i feel like jealousy is basically inevitable.

72: What do you most like about making out?

idk its just good >__

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

“usually” is tough when theres little data to go off of but no im not the initiating type.

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

actual speaking: eliza; texting/fb/snapchat: uhh shirley? maybe?

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

nope... the whole ace thing kinda keeps me away from that.

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

at this point in my life absolutely not, but later in life I dont think id have a problem with it.

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

not a lot but im incapable of keeping it to myself.

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

fuckin highschool tho im not mad slow dancing is uncomfortable.

86: How can I win your heart?

show me u love me and go on adventures with me. thats all i want. give me shiny things and be like “i saw this while i was walkin outside and it reminded me of you” it can be a dead leaf and ill still love it and you.

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

ermm. watching gossip girl maybe? or perusing tumblr?

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

nopee

92- answered

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

a dog

faster metabolism

ambition

extraverted friends

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

no 

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

no :’c people i dont kno irl dont talk to me really (except miki like twice and its so appreciated

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

id go on a friend date w anyone who will go on an adventure with me ok i need adventures.

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

yes but i feel like this is implying that i want to ask someone out. i dont.

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

“babe” feels kinda greasy so no.

106: Do you flirt a lot?

i.. dont think so?? i dont try to? but i do try to come across as a cute person does that count as flirting?

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

nuu

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

ANYONE? oh geez this is so stressful hmm what abt maybe minghao hes age appropriate and cute and i love him

112: Does someone like you currently?

if they do they should likE ME LOUDER bc i don’t kno about it but would like to.

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

well i think a serious relationship would be better but like i suCK at those so like flings i guess idk.

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?

single i think its just easier when you dont gotta worry about how you think that guy over there is cute as hell or you and some guy are growing closer and your so gonna be all jealous and like ugh i hate pda bc it annoys me so like i cant do it bc i know im being annoying ugh being in a relationship is just a lot of avoidable concerns