#maybe closer to cartoon gore?

[ohmigoshiloveu]

Shilo and grefgor have a lovely picnic with their lovely pheasant while they wait for emizel to wake up from being impaled by a nearby branch

I forgot to bring the pheasant back for the picnic, please forgive me

[charlottecutepie]

☥ Bunny meat (William Afton x fem!reader x Michael Afton)

Summary: He was a likeable middle-aged man who had wonderful children, his dream job and a beautiful wife. He never blamed himself for his own actions, or to be more exact, he never thought about their consequences.

tags: darkfic, unhealthy relationship, angst, smut with plot, p in v, dubcon, oral sex, rough and gentle sex, daddy kink, blood play, knife play, fear play, hurt/comfort, violence, gore/murders, child abuse, follows fnaf lore, moral and physical abuse, virginity kink, anxiety disorder, age gap, daddy issues, unreliable narrator, hallucinations, hidden pairing, William is sick, psychopathy, unhealthy narcissism

Chapter 5. Desire

Surprisingly, Wiliam behaved restrained, but inside him everything was on fire, he wanted to take you here and now, harshly and rudely, do things with you what he had long dreamed of all this time, but he knew perfectly well that if he snapped now, you'd be even more scared, cut with him all connections and will avoid him, and maybe even do something to yourself, because you're nothing but a little frightened lamb. A little creature who grew up alone, not needed by anyone, who didn't receive the proper amount of love and attention from her father. And that's why Afton thought he was the perfect source of all these feelings for you.

Perhaps, to some extent, he felt sorry you. However, his mind ignored such thoughts.

“William,” you spoke to him. “Is there no one at home?”

“Yes, Clara with kids left, I don't know where. She said she wouldn't be back until the morning.”

…

The Afton house is still same as it was before. Only coffee machine bought by the father of the family has changed. Although he earned a lot of money, little of it went to home improvement, Afton always invested only in the pizzeria, trying to make it as visible and attractive as possible.

It was also impossible to ignore the couch that was in the living room of the house. For you as a child, it was the most favourite object in Afton's house, you sat on it with Michael in the evenings and watched cartoons. When you had sleepovers with other kids, you hid under the covers because of Michael's scary stories. You often fell asleep on it late at night, without waiting for your mom, although she promised that she'd pick you up from the guests, but sometimes she never showed up because of scandals with her husband.

This couch evoked hundreds of emotions and nice memories.

But now, one more thing will be added to all these early memories: the way you lie on this couch under man who you saw as father, no matter how strange it sounds.

“You're so… beautiful,” he hovered over your body, his eyes running over it. “such delicate skin, like an angel's.” he took your hand, interlacing your fingers, kissing them. All thoughts in your head gathered into one big ball, you tried to analyze the situation somehow, but useless, because of his actions, you felt lost. William breathed out your name and greedily pressed his lips to your neck, showering it with light kisses.

You closed your eyes and turned your head to the side to give him more space, trying to relax, it seems you were succeeding. But unexpectedly for you, you felt him bite your neck.

“Oh!” bursted out of you, your free hand burrowed into his hair, trying to pull him away. “William, it hurts…” he looked up at you.

“I’m so sorry, bunny,” he smiled warmly at you. “I’ll be gentle.” he moved closer, gently kissing you on the corner of your lips. You leaned forward, hoping that this innocent kiss would turn into something more, however, Afton had other plans, he grinned and straightened up. “So impatient.”

He unbuttoned first three buttons of his purple shirt, which was enough for you to see the strange scars covering his body. You couldn't help, interest took over and your hands tentatively touched the bare area of his body.

“Where are they from?” you asked softly, causing him to chuckle again.

“It doesn't matter now, sweetheart.” he loosened the belt of his pants, after which he kissed your neck again, this time he kept his promise: you felt his tongue licking little wound he made. William took you by the hips, moving your body closer to him. “Y/n, you want this, don't you?”

“I… uh, I don't know.”

There is silence in response. William could tease you and your body for hours, nibbling and kissing it, making you sigh languidly, but this night he wanted to satisfy you first. He wanted to make you dependent on him, so that you couldn't live a day without his touch, so that you took the initiative yourself, so that you were head over heels in love. Corrupt you. However, he didn't know you were already so dependent on him, you want him to love you like in fairy tales about princesses, you want him to give you all the love that you were deprived of as a child. You just wanted someone to save you from loneliness.

You felt something hard pressing against the inside of your thigh, but you didn't want to look at what it was because of your wild embarrassment. Afton took something out of his pants pockets.

“Here, I see you need it,” you saw him holding out his hand to you with some kind of strange round pill. Confused, you looked at him, waiting for some explanation. William only laughed and ran his finger over your lips, opening them. “Yeah, and here it is, good girl.” he said, pushing the pill deeper until, due to the urge to vomit, you grabbed his wrist. “I'm sorry, baby, I just don't have anything to wash down the pill with.”

“What is it?” you winced at the unpleasant taste.

“Tranquilizers so you don't get nervous. Actually, they're mine, but I can tell by the look on your face they'll be useful for you too.” his hands carefully, as if afraid to scare you even more, undid the clasp of the dress, lowering it from your shoulders down. Unable to contain your shyness, you tried to hold the fabric on your body until William looked at you, as if mentally saying “don't.” Then your grip loosened, there was nothing you could do but obey. “that's it, good girl.”

When he wanted to take off the dress completely, you still grabbed on it, not letting it slide off your hips.

“Princess, if you keep doing this, then we won't succeed.” William looked into your eyes, putting your hands behind your head. “I won't hurt you.”

You nodded, trying to lose yourself in your feelings again. It seemed to be easier with the help of a sedative. You didn't even notice how you were only in your underwear in front of him.

“Damn, you're incredible.” he threw the dress somewhere on the floor, kissing you on the cheek while his hands caressed your hips and waist. You bit your lip to stifle a groan. Fuck, no one has ever touched you like that, especially in places like this, and when William ran his hand along the inside of your thigh, inadvertently touching your crotch, you arched your back. “it felt good, didn't it?”

William repeated the movement, but now paying more attention to your clothed pussy. The excitement took over, forcing you to move your hips towards his movements. A shudder of desire went through your whole body, Afton saw it perfectly, he kissed your collarbone, going lower to your breasts.

“Fuck, you have no idea how long I've been dreaming about this.” those words echoed in your head, but you didn't pay attention to it. “Honey, you're just so beautiful.” William ran his hands over your breasts, pinching your nipples hard with excitement.

“William…” you got the courage. He looked at you questioningly, damn, you hoped you said it so quietly that it would go unnoticed. “kiss me, please.”

He laughed. In a moment, his lips are on yours, like a predator. At that moment, you forgot absolutely everything, giving yourself completely to him. You moaned into his mouth, feeling his long fingers touching your pussy through your soaked panties. With one imperious movement, he pulls off the last piece of clothing, leaving you completely naked in front of him.

“And now? Not so scary anymore?”

“I don't know what i feel…” you were in turmoil, all fears and thoughts disappeared, a wild desire came to replace, no, not of intimacy, not of sex. But his affectionate words and compliments, the way he touches you, his gentle kisses and hugs, the way he treats you.

His fingers gently touch your labia, slowly and smoothly they move in circular movements along clit, getting another moan from you. With his other hand, he holds your legs, preventing you from moving away and closing them.

“And now, honey?”

“It's weird, but…” you avoided his gaze. ”feels good…” you answered unsure. Smiling contentedly, he removed his fingers. You noticed that as soon as his hands left your body, his movements in relation to himself instantly changed: he roughly, jerkily took off his belt and unbuttoned the fly of his pants, pulling them down. It’s like he was controlling himself when touching you.

“Lick them.” Afton said in a commanding tone, running his fingers over your lips. It was terribly embarrassing for you, but you did as he said anyway. You watched his actions with a note of sweet and naive excitement, the way his fingers penetrated deeper and deeper, pressing on your tongue, again caused unpleasant sensations to vomit. “Sorry, but there's no other way, I don't have any lube.”

When he pulled his fingers out of your mouth, quite considering how wet they were, you felt uncomfortable, but probably if you tell him about it, he's unlikely to listen and stop. The only thing left to do was to lie under him like a doll and enjoy.

“You're an obedient girl, aren't you?” his fingers went back to your glistening pussy, caressing your needy clit. Your breathing stopped instantly.

“Yes…” you whimpered when you felt his fingers, wet with your own saliva and grease, smoothly, insanely slowly entering you. William is building up the pace, not too fast, but enough to make soft sweet moans come out of your mouth. “Daddy…” you drawled languidly, feeling your soft walls tighten around his long fingers.

“Yes, princess?” Afton kisses your neck while his free hand wraps around his cock that was already out of his trousers, hard and dripping with precum. “Tell daddy what you want.”

“Please, want more…” you whispered in his ear, this time trying to be as seductive and sexy as possible. William found it funny.

“You'll get more, baby,” his breath tickled your skin. “Daddy will make you feel good.” Afton pulled out his fingers, causing you to moan in disappointment, oh, how he enjoyed it, it felt like he was ready to cum just from your angelic voice.

William tilted his head, being between your legs. The whole picture made you dizzy, you glance at him in surprise, trying to predict what will happen next. William grins, seeing how your curiosity plays tricks on you when he gives your clit a tender kiss.

“Ohhh, daddy,” this word is so vulgar, it sounds completely indecent on your tongue, but right now you don't care, all that matters is William Afton and the wild need to be needed by someone, loved, appreciated. “Yeah…”

The release builds up with an unfamiliar, wildly pleasant feeling in the lower stomach, making you want to close your legs, but his hands continued to hold them apart. His tongue feels too good, slowly moving in circular movements over your cunt, paying more attention to your clit while two fingers slowly and smoothly fucks you, forcing you to switch from moans to sobs and soft screams.

William accelerates, his movements getting faster and rougher, but no less passionate, making you arch from pleasure. With one hand buried in his dark brown hair, you try to set the pace, but he can do fine without you, so it's useless, he's much more experienced. He explored you with his tongue until the trembling left your supple body. William could feel your walls clenching around his fingers. His free hand continued to jerk himself off with increasing movements, while he was eating you out.

You sighed desperately when Afton stopped stimulating you with his tongue, lifting his head and looking at your reaction, his fingers still inside.

“Do you want to cum for daddy?” he asks, you just nod quickly, wishing of putting an end to these sweet torments that drive you crazy. “No, I need you to say it, honey.”

“Yes, yes, yesss,” you say brokenly. “I…” an uncertain pause. “I want to cum, daddy, please!” oh, it was so humiliating, but what was more terrible that you liked it.

“Good girl.” William increased the intensity of his movements, hitting all right sweet spots of yours. You moaned loudly, feeling everything tense in your lower abdomen, which means an imminent orgasm. “do it, cum while I fuck your little pussy with my fingers.” William growled, his hand that was touching his own cock stopped, now squeezing your neck, pressing on the carotid artery, but hearing your wheezing, he his grip loosens.

Your moans, which are more like crying, turn into loud, piercing “oohs”, your head's spinning, your brain's melting, everything is like in a fog, you can't even see Afton's face. The long-awaited release is catching up with you. You cum, you cum so hard that you feel ecstasy running through your whole body, you feel that your breathing becomes ragged, and your pussy clenching on his fingers.

“Such a good girl,” because of orgasm, you don't even hear what he says, and you don't want to, you need time to regain your strength. “it's my turn now, baby.”

He takes his fingers out, brings them to his mouth and licks them, studying your reaction. William touches his member again, his heartbeat quickens, his eyes now closed, apparently he's thinking about something. Yes, he's definitely imagining something in his head.

“Tell me, do you love daddy?“ he asked, his voice hoarse from excitement. He isn't even looking at you.

“Yes,” you responses quietly. Taking advantage of the moment, you look at him in detail while he doesn't notice. Damn, how handsome he was, his long, such aristocratic fingers that played with the tip of his cock, rubbing cum along entire length, his slightly disheveled but insanely beautiful brown hair like milk chocolate, his sharp cheekbones, it was stupid to deny that he was unattractive. “I love daddy, I love you, William.” you didn't even fully understand what you were talking about. You was just saying what he wanted to hear.

He pumps his cock faster, you see how he shuddered, like saying your name or something else, you can't understand. But you catch yourself thinking that it's damn beautiful. If your mom found out what you were doing, she probably wouldn't be happy.

He cums on your stomach, with a loud groan, and then, breathing heavily, falls on the couch next to you, staring blankly at the ceiling. What is he thinking about? Is he even thinking now? You're lying obediently by his side, trying to figure out what just happened, but your brain doesn't want to think, your head is aching, your temples are throbbing. William turns to you, then looks at the crumpled dress on the floor, then back at you.

“Let's go to the shower, bunny, I'll help you wash up.”

…

The next morning came for you only closer to 12, when you were suddenly woken up by the sound of the door opening. It was Clara with Michael and Elizabeth. Confused, not even realizing that you were in their house, you jumped up from the couch.

“Michael, give Elizabeth that hoodie, you're not wearing it anyway.” woman's voice was heard somewhere in the hallway area, which means that she was nearby.

“Mom, these are my things, and just because I don't wear them doesn't mean that—”

Michael entered living room, but when he saw you, he froze in place.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” he asked, a slight smile appearing on his face.

“Who are you talking to?” Clara’s voice sounded, but as soon as she appeared in the room, her emotions immediately changed. “Oh, hello, honey.” woman affectionately called your name, coming up to you and sitting down on the sofa. “Elizabeth, go say hello to Y/n!”

Girl immediately rushed over, you noticed a plush toy in her hands, it seems it was the same robot girl drawing of which Elizabeth recently showed you. She greeted you cheerfully, all you could do was say an awkward “hello” in response, still trying to remember how you even ended up here. Clara stroked your head, her gaze fixed on your face, on your tousled hair and lost expression. You knew that you had to say something in your own defense, why you were here.

“Sorry for such an oversight, I had some problems with my mom, and Mr. Afton told me to spend the night here.” you lied, and then mentally slapped yourself. Damn, this is so dumb. The Afton family knew that you had the best relationship with your mom and that you had never argued. You doubted how truth your words sounded, but judging by Clara's reaction, everyone believed you.

“Honey, I'm glad that you have somewhere to go, you know that we'll always welcome you with hugs,” she said tenderly, with maternal love. “You must be hungry. I'll go to the store and cook breakfast, what do you think?”

There was no point in lying further, you really needed something to eat, so you silently agreed.

Mrs. Afton went to the nearest grocery store, taking Elizabeth with her. You and Michael were left alone, you gradually began to remember what happened, and with the realization that you and Afton had something, you were overtaken by a sickening anxiety, causing your toes and hands to go numb and shake, and your heart to beat faster. You two were sitting on this damn couch watching TV, however, neither of you was interested in what the old screen was showing. You were sitting hugging your knees, wondering whose clothes you were wearing: they were of a child surely, with some kind of cartoon print, a t-shirt and, as it seems, Michael's pants. He didn't hesitate to look at you from head to toe, which slightly annoyed you.

“Michael, stop staring.” You hissed, tucking your face into your lap.

“I'm just trying to figure out,” he paused, thinking about something. “why are you wearing my dead brother's t-shirt?”

“What?”

“Well… I'm not accusing you of anything… it's just…” he scratched his head, clearly not knowing what to say to you. ”Okay, forget it. It's just my shit in my head.”

“Michael, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…” you looked at him. Why did William choose his dead son's clothes out of all? “There must be some kind of misunderstanding.”

“It's nothing, y/n, you shouldn't worry so much about it.”

You looked at the TV, trying to come up with some kind of ridiculous excuse, but in vain. And how long can you lie?

“Speaking of my brother… today, Elizabeth, mom and I went to his grave.” Michael muttered, you knew perfectly well that this topic of conversation wasn't the best, because the he blamed himself enough for what happened. You decided that the best thing you can do now is just listen to him. “You know… it's already overgrown with grass. We had to work hard to get the grave back to normal. Oh, and there's also a lot of webs.”

You knew that only people who cared for Evan's gravestone were Clara and Michael. William, after his son's death, never visited grave, and even more so, didn't attend the funeral, citing the fact that he had a lot of work. And when Evan was in a coma, with minimal chance of survival, Michael came to him almost every day, crying and begging for forgiveness.

You knew that Michael was just a traumatized guy and it was useless to blame him for all this, he had already heard a lot about himself from his father, so you just moved closer to him when you noticed him dropping tears on the couch and hugged him.

Half an hour later, Mrs. Afton returned from the store. Michael wasn't in such good mood as before, but as soon as his mother crossed the threshold of their house, he seemed to put on a mask of happiness, meeting her and helping to carry bags into the kitchen.

For breakfast, which smoothly turned into lunch, Clara served macaroni and cheese and caesar salad. Your stomach, which hasn't received normal hot food for a long time, rejoiced and you ate all two portions in a few minutes. Elizabeth talked most of all at the table, telling you something about robots and toys again. Yes, once upon a time Michael, and Clara herself, told you that she took after her father. She's also interested in mechanics and loves animatronics.

Looking at this whole family, you felt guilty about yesterday. Probably, to some extent, you even hated yourself. Mrs. Afton, the nicest woman you've ever known, after your mom, of course. Michael is a devoted and faithful friend, as well as a caring brother, Elizabeth is just the sunshine of this family, cheerful, everyone's favorite. And William is a charming and likeable man who was ready to do anything for his family and work. At least that's how the family seemed to you in your head.

You're lost in your own thoughts, stopped listening to Elizabeth's babble. The damn guilt was eating you, making you sick of yourself. How could you do that? How dare you drag a married man, the head of the family, into bed, and then sit at the same table with his family, smiling innocently at everyone. What the fuck is wrong with you? Mrs. Afton will definitely find out, Michael will find out and Elizabeth will find out, and then you will become a disgrace to the whole town. You will become known as a little slut who seduced a married man. Not just a man, but William Afton himself.

“By the way, honey, did William tell you where he is?” Clara asked, and you squinted, trying to remember what Afton had told you before you dozed off.

“He said he was going to the pizzeria to work.” you said, it was true. Clara's face changed.

“What?” a rhetorical question. “he never worked on that day, he always had a day off exactly… today.”

Meanwhile, William was already at the pizzeria.

[sunoorintarou]

Catharsis: Incandescent Grace

Phos!Reader x (Platonic) Gojo Satoru

Warnings: Child abuse, domestic abuse, toxic familial relationships, blood, gore, death, self blaming, depression, manipulation, suicidal ideation, the usual Catharsis warnings

Notes: Alexa play Beautiful Boy by John Lennon

It had happened so fast. A second ago, you were narrowly dodging a glass plate being launched at your head. Your father had had a bad day at work. A common occurrence.

To make things worse, he and your mother were in the middle of an argument. You had been tiptoeing across a rope suspended over a blazing fire. It was only natural it would snap from the heat.

Your fingers were trembling, heart racing as your father neared you, screaming about how this was your fault. Everything was your fault. But this time, he was taking it a bit far, grabbing a shard of the broken plate and nearing you.

You were scared. Terrified.

Why you?

The question rang in your head.

What did you do to deserve this?

Everything around you sounded muffled, as if you were underwater. Vision blurry with tears as your father only got closer. Muscles tensed as you braced yourself for the pain.

You didn't deserve this.

You didn't deserve any of this.

The pain, the hurt, the tears, the fear. Everything. It was all because of these people.

Your parents. The people that were supposed to protect you. To love you. Your mothers words rang in your head.

"We do this because we love you."

Was this... love? How would you define it? Was love the feeling of your father's belt against your skin? The feeling of your mother's nails digging into your arms? Was it the way they'd lock you away for days as punishment before pulling you out. Holding and telling you how much they loved you. How they only did it because they cared. Because they wanted the best for you.

If this was love, you didn't want it. You didn't want them.

You had seen children walking around with her parents. Smiling so brightly, giggling as their parents played with them, held them, cared for them, comforted them when they cried.

You used to sit in the park for hours. Watching them. Wondering if your parents would love you like that if you acted more like those children.

You remembered how hard you tried. The flowers, the letters, all ending up dead, in pieces, all over their floor. Your mother calling them useless, frail things. She didn't need them. She didn't need you. Neither did your father. They were being kind, taking care of you. Or so they claimed.

Everything they did. They said it was to make you stronger. But you were a child. You didn't need to become stronger. You needed to be safe.

You remembered watching a cartoon when you were younger.

You remembered seeing a child held hostage by the bad guys. You remembered how the child was saved by a hero, a man shrouded in light. And that gave you hope. Maybe someone could save you too.

A hero. A saviour. Someone big and strong. Someone who's very existence would let you know everything would be OK. That you'd be OK.

And so, as your father neared, you prayed. You remembered a blurry face, a teacher at your preschool. God always answered the prayers of good kids. Or so she claimed.

For once in your life, you prayed for a miracle. For someone, anyone, something, anything.

Your mind wandered back to the hero in that cartoon. An angel may be too much, but you hoped a hero wasn't. He didn't have to be big or strong. He just had to be able to help you. You didn't mind anything. Anyone. As long as someone saved you from this.

What you hadn't realised was that your prayer would be answered in the worst way.

In a split second, everything changed.

Suddenly, there was blood on your face, and you were met with your father's head rolling across the floor, landing at your feet.

There it was. The monster under your bed. The one your parents refused to believe existed. The one that had caused their fight and would now seemingly cause their demise.

You had never seen it whole before. Used to the murky, spiderlike arms, clawed fingers, and sets of red eyes. But this, this beast, this demon, whatever it was, could only be described as your worst nightmare come true.

You were frozen in time. Sick to your stomach, but numb. Feeling everything and nothing at the same time.

You could only watch as your mother tried to fight off the monster, her screams deafening, eyes wide in terror.

It was then that something clicked. The monster under your bed had 4 eyes. But this one had 2. So where were the other 2?

Your heart dropped, watching as a large clawed hand ripped through your mother's torso. There they were. The second set of eyes. There were two monsters.

You could only watch as the monsters began to devour your parents' bodies, blood soaking your carpet, seeping across the wooden floors until it reached you. You then realised that this was it. You would die right here right now. This was where it would all end. This was the deliverance you had hoped for so many times.

You didn't fight when one of the monsters came to you, fingers brushing your arms, your back against the wall. All you could do was pray it wouldn't be too painful.

As its claws dug into your legs, you were reminded of your father. When you were still young. When he used to read your bedtime stories and hold you and sing to you. Perhaps that was also a form of love?

You wondered what had changed. Was it you? Was it him? Was it simply chance? Bad luck? Just what had happened?

You couldn't fight the tears. Mourning not only the life you lived but the life you'd now lose. How pathetic were you? Despite everything, you still didn't want to die.

You wanted to live.

It was then that an unfamiliar feeling overwhelmed your body, a faint feeling of warmth enveloping you, a faint teal glow. It surrounded your hand that had lied on the beast's head, pushing it away futilely.

With a great scream, your ears ringing in pain at the noise, where the beast once was, laid a large chunk of Phosphophyllite.

Your heart stopped. Were your eyes deceiving you? Was this some sort of entrance right to the afterlife?

The other beast seemed as startled as you, moving away in what you assumed to be fear. You reached out, hand lying on the chunk of stone. Had you done this? Was this you? Just what was this?

Suddenly, the gem glowed and your were filled with a cold so great, almost freezing and a pain so sharp, you couldn't breathe.

You screamed, blooding pouring from your lips, your nostrils, your ears, your eyes, writhing in agony on the floor.

You felt like a thousand knives were dissecting every nerve in your body. A chill so cold it burned overtaking you.

Please please please. Someone, anyone, help me. It hurts, it hurts so bad. Please make it go away. Please please please.

You were barely conscious, eyes half closed as you tried to fight the pain away.

Suddenly, you were enveloped by a white glow. Something seemingly defeating the other monster.

You felt a pair of hands scoop you up, large, strong, warm. So warm. So bright.

A voice. Soft, low, kind. Tears began to fall from your eyes.

"You'll be OK. Just focus on breathing."

You blinked rapidly, attempting to focus on it. You took deep breaths, the warmth of whoever was holding you slowly making the pain go away.

You inhaled deeply, the pain dulling to a sting under your skin. You felt warm, so warm. The kind of warmth you hadn't felt in years.

Your vision began to clear momentarily, and you were met with your hero. Your saviour.

Blue eyes, beautiful, sparkling, like the sky. When was the last time you had seen the sky?

White hair, bright and clean, like pure snow. When was the last time you had been outside?

Strong hands, gentle hands, cradling you against a hard chest, voice ridden with concern and comfort.

An angel. This had to be an angel. This man, whoever he was, had to be the deliverance you had been praying so hard for.

You fought to keep your eyes open, blinking up at the man as you began to sob.

"It's all over. You're safe now. Don't worry. It's OK, you're OK."

Something in you couldn't help but believe this stranger's words as they echoed in your head. You felt that as long as you were with him, everything would be OK. You'd be OK.

On that fateful fight when you thought you'd lost everything, you had found something you had long stopped searching for.

Salvation.

That unknown man was a symbol of peace, of safety, your second chance sent by a deity. A dove landing on the ark you had been stranded on.

As your vision faded, fatigue overcoming your being, something in you knew, as long as you had him, you'd be fine.

After all, he was your saviour. And unbeknownst to you, that night as he carried you to safety, he had sworn to never let anything like that happen to you ever again.

You were a child after all, and he vowed to keep you safe.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Daughter of the Rain and Snow

Concept: Around ten years after the events of Crooked Kingdom, 25-year-old Captain Inej Ghafa frees Maya Olsen from a pleasure house in Ketterdam. Maya is looking for revenge against the man who put her in her position, a man who she knows nothing about except his name: Kaz Brekker.

Tags: @wraith--2 @lunarthecorvus @just2bubbly @real-fragments7 @cartoon-clifford @origami-butterfly @lady-a-stuff

Content Warnings: in more general terms I want to remind people to be aware of the nature of Kaz and Inej's experiences and relationship since even if I'm not directly addressing these things they tend to be implicit in any writing about them, but specifically to this chapter there's ptsd, imprisonment, violence, blood, gore, grief, and discussions of death.

Chapter 75 - Jesper

Getting Inej to the Slat wasn’t an entirely simplistic process, which probably shouldn’t have been surprising considering they’d struggled to get her down a flight of stairs, but it was still harder than Jesper had expected. He and Nina managed to lift her onto a slightly makeshift stretcher that they could carry her on, but it wasn’t easy and they found themselves continually falling behind Kaz as they followed him through the tunnel towards the Crow Club. Kaz hadn’t said a word the entire walk, and Jesper wasn’t sure if he ought to try and talk to him. Possibly that would make everything worse.

There was something inherently terrifying about seeing Inej of all people like this, and Jesper could not stand the desperate sensation inside him to look away. Before they’d left the house he’d stood over her for a minute in the quiet, trying to calm the frantic feeling bubbling through him. He gripped her limp fingers in his for a moment. For Inej, he could do anything.

“You sure you’re gonna be okay?” he’d asked Wylan as they stood opposite each other in the doorway.

“Right here waiting for you,” said Wylan, winding his arm around Jesper’s waist to pull him closer, “Are you?”

Jesper nodded.

“As ever,”

“Come back safe,”

“I’ll consider it,” Jesper teased, leaning towards him, “For you,”

“Jes…”

Their lips met for the briefest second. Jesper lifted a hand to Wylan’s cheek and felt the trace of a tear.

“Damn,” he whispered, “Didn’t think I was that bad a kisser,”

Wylan laughed softly, taking Jesper’s hand in his.

“Wylan, it’s gonna be…”

“I know. I know. Just bring Inej back safe - and Kiada. And you come home safe too, promise?”

I promise you-

Don’t say that.

Jesper pressed a kiss against the back of Wylan’s hand.

“Always,”

The Healer - Evan, Jesper had overheard his name as - was yet to arrive when their ramshackle little group reached the Slat, and it was more than obvious that Kaz was on edge.

“We got word he’s on his way,” said Anika, as she helped Nina and Jesper carry Inej up to the apartment on the top floor.

“Then where is he?” asked Kaz.

“Maybe he was with a client wh-”

“If he’s prioritising anything else right now then he’d better start praying,”

No-one said anything more. No-one was stupid enough.

They laid Inej on the bed, then Nina gently rolled her onto her side and arranged her limbs the same way as before. She’d undone the top button of Inej’s collar as well, and now quickly ran two fingers beneath the fabric around her neck to make sure it was loose enough for Inej to breathe easily.

“I’ll have Pim stay on the door for you,” Kaz told Nina as she crossed the room back to the group, “Just in case. Anika, you’re with us,”

“Where are we going?”

“Rollins’ safehouse,”

Anika looked at Inej, then back at Kaz.

“Now?”

“Now. Get Roeder and Vix, then-”

“Vix is on Ethan duty,”

Jesper frowned.

“Ethan duty?”

His confusion went unresolved.

“I doubt he’ll run,” said Kaz, “But stick Jhar on the door instead. We need about ten people with us,”

Anika looked wary, but she nodded and slipped around the door frame out of sight. The Healer had still not arrived and if Kaz had any patience left it was fraying quickly. He glanced at his pocket watch.

“We don’t have long left to get the girl,”

“Then I’ll go,” said Nina, “You stay with Inej, I-”

“No. We’ll leave now - if you’ve not heard from Evan in fifteen minutes, find Yara downstairs and send her to the White Rose to find him,”

“Kaz you should stay with her,”

“I have a job to do, Nina, and so do you so get on with it,”

Nina swallowed. She glanced at Jesper, but he had little more to offer her than a hesitant shrug.

“This is about getting Kiada back safely and protecting Inej,” she said

“Yes,” Kaz agreed, “It is,”

“And it is only about Kiada and Inej,”

Kaz smiled.

“Now, I’m afraid, you’ve lost me,”

“Kaz,”

“Nina, dear, I’ll only say this once more: you concern yourself with your job, and I’ll concern myself with mine. Jesper, let’s move,”

Jesper shot an apologetic look towards Nina’s exasperated one, then hurried to follow Kaz from the room. Kaz paused at the top of the stairs and turned back, frowning.

“I left my knife in the other room,” he said, which seemed about as suspicious a statement as he could’ve come up with.

They both knew damn well that Kaz was carrying at least two knives at any given moment, and there was no particular individual blade he might have forgotten in his apartment. But Jesper stayed quiet as Kaz moved back past him to the door. After a moment Nina appeared in the hallway as well, shaking out her shirt cuffs and looking thoroughly unimpressed.

“Did he actually just kick us out so he can say goodbye to Inej?”

“Of course he did,” said Jesper, “What did he tell you?”

“That he needed me to get a ledger from his office. A ledger. Right now,” she shook her head in disbelief, and Jesper laughed.

“Is it just me who remembers him being a better liar?”

Nina snorted.

“Where Inej is concerned? Never. You’re just terrible at reading people,”

*

Rollins was hiding out a little farther south than the Slat and the Crow Club, a fact which Roeder had apparently discovered that night when Alby limped his way back from the Geldstradt.

“He took a long route,” Roeder explained as they walked, “went all the way past the embassies then up to the harbours before he came back down again. I thought he was trying to throw me off the scent, but it don’t seem like he noticed me,”

“What was he doing then?”

“Got me. What does he want with you and Brekker anyway?”

Jesper shrugged.

“To continue a vicious cycle?” he offered.

Roeder didn’t reply.

Kaz split the group into small teams; he would go in through the back with Vix and Rotty, Jesper, Anika, and Roeder were to approach from above by going through the building next door, and the rest would go in through the front or surround the building in case Alby tried to run. They weren’t sure if there would be anyone in the place except Alby and Kiada, but Kaz doubted it.

“Stay on guard,” he told Jesper as they parted, “but he doesn't trust anyone, and based on the numbers we took out at yours I doubt he has many others in waiting,”

Jesper nodded.

“No mourners,” said Anika.

“No funerals,”

The words echoed briefly through the group, and then Kaz was gone and Jesper was moving quickly away.

The building next door to Alby’s was a safehouse of the Liddies, not currently in use but Anika told Jesper that they’d set a deal for short term use of the space just in case. Jesper frowned; when had this deal been made? And based on the state of the Crow Club, what would Kaz have to trade? They slipped inside and straight up the stairs, then waited until the signal from Vix to cross to the next window. Roeder crossed first and picked the lock, the thirty seconds it took him only reminding Jesper just how skilled Kaz was with his picks, and then Jesper and Anika followed him into the building. As the others began to try the doors nearest to them, Jesper hurried straight up to the third floor.

The doors to the first two rooms he checked weren’t locked, but he slipped inside and called Kiada’s name anyway. The third door he tried just rattled on its hinges and he was about to try cracking the lock when Anika’s voice rose from the stairwell. He only caught the end of her sentence:

“…think we’ve got her,”

He ran downstairs to where Roeder was almost finished picking another lock. He ushered the others back and opened the door slowly, leaning round the edge before he slipped inside and pushed the door to swing almost shut behind him.

It was a small room, bare of furniture save for a spindly chair with a sheet thrown over it on one corner and a cobweb-ridden trunk pushed up against it, with no lights and no window. A sudden banging sound from the room next door shivered through the tight space, and the girl crouching in the darkness flinched.

“Kiada?”

She sat in the farthest corner of the room, knees held up to her chest and her hands hidden somewhere behind them. At first he wasn’t sure if she’d heard him; she shuffled slightly, pressing closer to the walls she leant against, but did not look up until after a moment had passed. She turned slowly, her wide, frightened eyes meeting his in the dark.

“Kiada, thank the Saints,” he breathed, “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?”

Jesper moved forwards and Kiada pushed herself back against the wall, screwing her eyes shut. He froze.

“We’re getting out of here,” he whispered, “I promise you,”

Don’t say that. Please.

She stared at him. And after a moment, she lifted one of her hands above her lap so he could see the heavy iron shackles on her wrists.

I’m gonna string that bastard up, thought Jesper as he traced the chain with his eyes.

It ran across the floor behind her, he’d missed it in the shadows until now, and disappeared through a small hole at the base of the wall.

“He has the other end?”

She nodded.

“Alright, I should be able to get you out; Can I come over to you?”

There was a moment of hesitation before Kiada nodded again. Jesper approached slowly and knelt down in front of her. He let her reach her hands out to his instead of taking them, and inspected the shackles cautiously. They were too thick for him to break with any ease and he didn’t have anything to meld into a lockpick - not that he was sure he knew what he was doing with one anyway. He could probably separate the cuffs from the chains though; he’d be leaving Kiada with a set of heavy, unwelcome bracelets to figure out how to get rid of later, but at least she’d be able to run. He took a breath.

A diagonal slice of his hand snapped the first link in the chain off her left hand, and a second did the right. Kiada jumped, then closed her eyes for a moment and flexed her fingers.

“You’re zowa,” she whispered, staring at him like she’d seen a ghost.

Jesper pulled the broken chains away from her wrists.

“I’m sorry I can’t do more than that right now,” he said, “But I’ll get them off when we’re home, alright?”

“Thank you,”

Jesper stood up and brushed a few pieces of grime off his trousers, then offered Kiada his hand. He wasn’t sure she’d take it, but she clung to him firmly and stayed close every step he took. They slipped from the room together and onto the landing, where several of the Dregs were waiting. Kaz’s group must have moved up here as well. Kiada gripped his hand tighter and Jesper heard the anxious spike in the air as her breath caught in her throat.

“It’s okay,” he murmured, “Sorry I should’ve told you they were here. They’re with us,”

Kiada said nothing.

“Where’s Kaz?”

Rotty opened his mouth, but before he’d had a chance to answer Kaz appeared from the room next to the one Jesper and Kiada had just emerged from. There was blood on his clothes and splattered across his face, but more notably he was dragging Alby Rollins along with him by his collar. The head of Kaz’s cane was pressed against Alby’s neck, Jesper would’ve called it a pretty safe guess to say his nose was broken, and when Kaz released him and shoved him onto his knees the boy spat blood onto the floor. He tried to get up but met a hard crack from Kaz’s cane straight across his chest and coughed hard.

Jesper felt Kiada’s grip on his hand tighten.

When Alby drew a knife from his sleeve the entire building seemed to snap alert, the Dregs reached for their various weapons and Jesper, Rotty, and Anika all moved to step forwards before Kaz gave them the briefest shake of his head. Jesper recognised the dark gleam in Kaz’s eyes and lightly placed a hand on Kiada’s shoulder.

“Don’t look,” he murmured, gently redirecting her.

Jesper did look. It wasn’t pretty.

He watched Alby’s blood spill onto the floorboards. He saw Esme falling.

Alby was somehow still breathing. He clambered slowly to his feet, joints cracking loud enough to make Kiada flinch at Jesper’s side. By this point he’d lost his knife, kicked across the floor by Kaz and collected by Rotty, but apparently he just really didn’t know when to stop. Within the entire next minute Jesper only counted two blows actually landing on Kaz, and lost track of how many landed on Alby. The pair ended up vanishing back through the door they’d come through, and Jesper hesitated.

He should go. He should take Kiada home and he should go back to Inej.

Jesper had never been good at doing what he should.

“Anika!” Jesper beckoned her across the landing, then turned to Kiada, “This is Anika, she’s going to walk with you just a few streets to a building with a grey façade, okay? You’ll know it when you see it - The boards are tilted at the front so it looks like it’s leaning on the building next to it. She’ll take you upstairs and Inej and Nina will be there, alright? And then I’ll either see you there or back at the house,”

Kiada stared at him for a moment, and then gave the barest nod. Jesper took the win.

“Okay, Anika, this is Kiada. Take her back to the Slat and don’t leave her until Nina or Inej are able to take over for you. She’s your responsibility,”

Anika nodded, and Jesper began to turn away before he paused and shot a look back over his shoulder to Anika.

“And if anything happens to her you’re dead in the water, and I will personally see to that. Okay?”

Anika raised her eyebrows, then nodded before she turned to Kiada and started directing her down the hallway. Jesper looked back towards the door. He could still hear Kaz and Alby in the next room and he could still feel Esme’s blood on his hands.

Esme, look at me, you’re going to be okay. I promise you-

Don’t say that. Please. I don’t want to make you break it.

Jesper breathed.

I’m sorry.

He was going to get answers. And he was going to make that bastard pay.

[attackmybutt]

Looking for an RP partner

So... lately I have been having an itch to write/RP... it's been years since I last wrote anything substantial... but I want to hop back onto the "bicycle" so to speak, so here's to some self advertising and info about myself.

Before you proceed, keep in mind I'm 29NB and any future partners willing to RP with me MUST be 21+. I would prefer it if they were 25+ as it would mean they are closer to my age, but I'm not going to be nit picky about the age range as long as they are 21 years old.

I have some RP experience both in tumblr and discord, but as I previously stated, it's been years. I also written a fic here and there, years ago.

My replies tend to vary from one liner sentences to multiple paragraphs in one go or in-between depending on my creative juices. You don't need to match my length (if I get crazy and reply you in one too many multiple paragraphs) if the creative juices aren't flowing.

I am looking for a casual partner, someone who feels comfortable with me and vice versa. Someone who wants to have fin with me and making up stories for our favorite characters/ships.

Also very important for me, communication is key. Specially before starting a RP and during. We have to know each other's squicks, hard no's and anything that could be potentially triggering to either one of us.

I am very open minded and I am willing to RP almost anything for example: smut, GL, BL, HET, dark stuff, violence, gore, bdsm, a/b/o, mpreg/fpreg....etc. Thinking about it, I might just RP about anything as long as it's talked to beforehand, there might be some instances where I might say no, depending on the characters and the story being written. (I'm saying like if the situations call for it I might bre willing to write vore, which I personally don't like)

I shall only RP in discord and discord only. It's easier and cleaner. I ain't going back to tumbr RPing, unless I get begged to go back to that mess. I don't wan't create a character tumblr blog ever again, or do I?

I am an ever loving multi-shipper and love many ships, however I do have my OTPs.

I don't mind doing RP with OCs, whether they be OC x OC, or MC x OC. I do have some OCs that live mostly in my head. (I might share them one day to the world, maybe, maybe not.)

And now... it is time to put down the list of some of the fandoms I am willing to RP and the characters (muses) I am comfortable to RP as and some of the ships that go with it. (Bold means I feel way more comfortable than usual writing for the character, don't know why, some characters just sing to my soul I guess?) Regardless, I'll RP as anyone and I'll do any ships, unless they are a NOTP. This is just a sample list, if you decide to RP with me, we can talk more in depth about it.

Jujutsu Kaisen -I am all caught up with the manga- (muses: Gojo Satoru, Itadori Yuuji, Nanami Kento, Zenin Maki, Todo Aoi) (Ships: Any/Yuuji, Maki/Nobara, Satoru/Suguru, Nanami/Vacation, etc...)

Chainsaw Man -I am all caught up with the manga- (muses: Denji, Power) (ships: any/any)

Gintama -I am feeling nostalgic- (muses: Shimura Shinpachi, Sakata Gintoki, Kondo Isao, Okita Sougo) (ships: ginshin, kondo/okita, hijikata/okita...etc)

Dragon Ball (muses: Son Goku, Vegeta, Bulma..etc) (ships: any)

Demon Slayer (muses: Kamado Tanjiro, Agatsuma Zenitsu, Rengoku Kyojuro, Uzui Tengen) (ships: any)

Uh... those are the ones that are coming up with some character preference... Here's another list of other fandoms I am in and are willing to RP. It is mixed media, not only anime like the above list.

Daimond no Acce

A Song of Ice and Fire (that includes the shitshow that GoT became)

House of the Dragon

SuperBat (yes, just the ship. I am familiar with DC to some degree, movies, some cartoons -Justice League-)

Marvel (I'm stuck in stucky, but I am more comfortable with Marvel than I am with DC)

Naruto (No Boruto anything.)

Bleach

Fate Series

JoJo

Eyeshield21

...and more... just ask and I shall let you know. If you decide we would be a good RP, just sent me a message here in tumblr or an ask. (and pray I actually see it cause I'm bad with that kind of stuff)

[razieltwelve]

Mother and Son (Final Rose x Bleach)

Masaki’s eyes widened as the Hollow closed in and her Quincy powers stuttered and failed to activate.

No!

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Ichigo. She had to protect him! It didn’t matter if her Quincy powers weren’t working. He was her son. If she had to give her life then -

SQUELCH.

The Hollow crashed to the ground, split cleanly in two. There was another whistling sound and the halves became quarters. And still the Hollow tried to rise only to be crushed into pulp by an overwhelming force from above that cracked the pavement and sent the rain flying outward.

Masaki stumbled to a stop beside Ichigo and moved in front of him.

“Who’s there?” she shouted. “Who did that?”

A figure emerged from amidst the carnage. Her eyes narrowed. What... what was she looking at?

Her spiritual senses were telling her that the person in front of her was a normal human woman, but that was impossible. A normal human could never have done what she’d just seen, which meant that this person had the ability to camouflage their spiritual power perfectly.

“Hello there.” The woman had sapphire eyes and dark, spiky hair. “You’re not injured, are you? I wasn’t going to intervene, but then your powers just... stopped working.” The woman smiled, and her teeth were just a bit too long and a bit too sharp to be human. “And don’t worry. I’m not with this loser.” The woman raised her hand, and the soul and pulped, broken remains of the Hollow flowed into a sphere of spiritual power and gore that the woman devoured with obvious relish. “Hmm... not too bad. It takes a bit like beef.”

“What... what are you?” Masaki whispered.

“You know,” the woman said. “I’ve always had a soft spot for kids... and their parents. Whatever I am, you don’t have to worry about me going after you or your family unless you go after me first.” She tilted her head to one side. “Are your powers still not working?”

Masaki tried to use her powers again, but they were gone... like there was a hole in her soul. She needed to talk to her husband and Ryuken about this, not to mention Urahara. Something was very, very wrong. “No.”

“Hmm... you’re a Quincy, right?” The woman walked closer, and Masaki took a reflexive step back, careful to keep Ichigo sheltered behind her. Her son was clinging onto her tightly, but she did her best to soothe his concerns, running one hand through his hair. “Relax. I already said you don’t have anything to fear from me.” She grinned. “Would it help if I promised?”

“Uh...”

“Heh. Probably not.” The woman chuckled. “Would it help if I said that if I wanted you and the rest of the city dead, you all would be?”

“No!” Masaki cried.

“Yeah. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that.” The woman laughed. “I’m sorry. It’s the company I keep. Anyway, why don’t I walk you and your kid home. Without your powers you’re a sitting duck for Hollows, but you’re exactly the kind of tasty morsel they’ll go after.”

“...”

“Oh, fine.” The woman reached into empty space and then tossed a sword to Masaki. “If you’re so worried, you can have that.”

Masaki caught the sword. “What is this?”

“It’s a little something I put together as a... test. That sword is made of materials that are designed to damage spiritual beings like Hollows and Soul Reapers. It can also absorb ambient spiritual power to fuel other functions like throwing energy blasts.” The woman snickered. “But don’t go pointing it at a Vasto Lorde or something. That wouldn’t end well.”

“Why would you give me this?”

“Because it’s a trinket to me, and I’ve already come up with better weapons. But right now, you need it.” The woman shrugged. “And that kid of yours is wearing the right sort of merchandise. How could I let a Gary fan lose their mother?”

“Gary?” Masaki stared. Gary was the new cartoon that had come out. It was popular with all the kids, and Ichigo had won a hat as a prize in a raffle at the local shopping mall the other day. It was a garish orange, but he seemed to like it. “That’s...” She sighed. “You know what? Fine. If you want to walk us home, be my guest. If you were going to hurt us, you probably would have by now.” She paused. “And what should I call you?”

“Call me...” The woman paused dramatically. “Claw.”

X   �� X     X

Author’s Notes

Diana was planning on eating Grand Fisher because she doesn’t like him, but she thought she’d let Masaki deal with him since it would give her an opportunity to see another Quincy in action. When her powers failed, she decided to intervene since, as Diana says, she’s got a soft spot for kids and their parents.

At this point in the timeline, Diana has already eaten enough people to understand how to perfectly camouflage her spiritual pressure, which what allows her to go to the Human World and do all sorts of things... like spread Gary to another world.

[hismercytomyjustice]

X-Men ‘97 Spoilers Below the Cut

I don’t know about y’all but I’m feeling TOTALLY NORMAL about the way the most recent episode ended.

Glad to see Magneto’s still around, but damn I love me a fucked up homoerotic borderline torture scene sometimes.

Can’t wait to see him waste this dude.

Also, I am not up to speed on all the X-Men lore but don’t they have time travel? I feel like if there was ever a time to use it, it would be now? I was just really surprised to see them burying everyone.

Magneto is my #1 X-Man tho. Really digging his vibe right now with all the fucked up political bullshit going on in real life.

—-

X-Men spoilers have ended. Now I’m just yapping.

—-

I feel like this show hits the LGBTQ+ experience beats pretty well at times. I’m behind the times on the rep there. I was never super into X-Men, though I watched the cartoons growing up. It took me a while to delve back into the movies too because I got hardcore body horror freaked out when that dude got liquified in the first one.

My tolerance for that kind of thing used to be waaaay lower than it is now. I had to leave the theater because the gore at the beginning of Zombieland gave me a literal panic attack, haha. I didn’t start watching The Walking Dead until like 2015 for the same reason. Thankfully that kind of thing doesn’t really bother me anymore. It’s weird now to think back to how it used to.

Of course movie theaters in general used to give me panic attacks. It was almost a guarantee for a while that if I went into a movie theater, I was gonna have one. Zombieland was the first and maybe only time I ever had to leave because of one though. Usually I’d just pretend like nothing was happening as far as my friends were concerned and just force my way through them.

Tbh, Ted Lasso was the first time I felt I saw a really good representation of what a panic attack could feel like. Internally it’s like your world is falling apart around you, but externally it can be pretty innocuous unless you’re having major physical symptoms. If you have them often enough, you get pretty good at masking them. I’ve had them loads of times around family and friends and didn’t tell anyone.

Thankfully I don’t have panic attacks nearly that often anymore. And yes, I 100% probably should have said something to my loved ones at the time. But it can be hard when you know you’re experiencing something that isn’t rational and there’s not really anything they can do to help except ride the wave alongside you.

True, some triggers for panic attack can be pretty distressing. But I’ve definitely had them other times where I was just annoyed as hell that my body decided to randomly throw an anxiety party and it’d just be a matter of waiting it out.

Tbh, birth control really helped with mine for a while. I had really bad PMDD and my panic attacks were almost like clockwork with my cycle. I used to dread the impending doom I’d feel as I got closer to the date. I went from having panic attacks multiple times a month to only every so often. Antidepressants have been a godsend on that front too. I had no idea they also worked with anxiety because I never took them specifically for it until 2022.

I got massively sidetracked, but I really enjoy talking about mental health on here. It helps me reflect and process a lot. Sometimes it feels like just casually talking about it takes away some of fear and self-stigma away. That’s also one of the main things I’ve been learning about in therapy, not engaging in avoidance thoughts/behaviors when it comes to my OCD.

That also reminds me of what Marcus says a lot on LPOTL. “Mental illness isn’t your fault, but it is your responsibility.” It fucking sucks, but it’s true. In my experience, there’s a huge difference between interacting with someone who’s actively trying to live with their mental illness rather than choosing to ignore it and refusing to seek treatment.

Not that seeking and finding the right treatment and meeting your mental illness head on are easy things to do. It’s a bit privileged to say that. But as someone who didn’t get treatment for most of their life because they didn’t realize they needed treatment (“my symptoms aren’t that bad, it’s just a little anxiety, my prior attempts to seek help blew up in my face, x family member has this and is fine, etc”), lemme just tell ya I bet I am a much more enjoyable person to be around now.

I’m lucky in that I don’t believe I’ve ever lost any family or friends over my previously untreated mental illness. However, I know that I’m a hell of a lot happier and fun to be around when I’m on my medications and receiving regular therapy. I’m far less likely to subject others to my doom spirals and obsessive thoughts. I would get sick of talking about them, so I can only imagine how my captive audience felt.

Sure, there’s more I could be doing, but at least I have a pretty solid foundation under me now. I’m hoping to continue to build on it in time.

[financialsmatter]

Sunday Funnies, If You're Not Offended...

Welcome back to this week’s edition of the Sunday Funnies, where last week we witnessed the unimaginable in that Google announced they’re firing over 12,000 people. In his email, CEO Sundar Pichai lamented over the changing business environment but noted:    “…we're going to support employees as they look for their next opportunity.” LOL! Maybe Google’s lamentations will increase when tatted pink haired freaks with nose rings start showing up and have a hard time filling out the application form because of pronoun confusion... Or Maybe Sundar’s words… “this world that we are living in isn't going to exist within the next 10 years” means more than just advancing technology. Or Maybe, JUST MAYBE Google is worried about the inevitable onslaught of law suits and repercussions after they forced everyone to take the clot shot. Hmmm! In any event, Google’s email can be summed up as follows:       In other news, Greta “How Dare You” Thornburg faked being arrested while protesting her worn out “Climate Change” narrative. Ironically (or NOT) it was reminiscent of AOC faking being arrested and handcuffed as a pathetic publicity stunt.       And while we’re on the subject of pathetic publicity stunts, world renowned climate expurt Al “the North Pole will be ice-free in the summer by 2013 because of man-made global warming” Gore went into a Greta Beast Mode at Klaus Schwab’s World Economic Forum (WEF) in Davos.       And can someone tell us who in the world commissioned the $10 Million statue/atrocity in Boston as a memorial to Martin Luther King last Monday?   Seriously…WTF?       But that’s precisely why we publish the Sunday Funnies. You see, we use our funnies/memes/cartoons in an effort to counter the madness and frustration that accompanies Turbulent Times. Because when it’s all said and done, we all need to laugh every now and then. Why? Laughter is good for your soul. And it’s healthy to be a bit silly…especially in the face of fear mongering, medical tyranny, and especially the threat of WWIII. It’s all the more reason why we won’t apologize…especially if our Funnies just happen to hurt some Progressive/Socialist/Communist/Globalist’s feeeellwwings. And please remember: The Sunday Funnies are not just about our nations bizarre state of politics/finance/beliefs. It’s about awareness of what’s happening in the world that we choose to poke fun at. And, if our funnies/memes/cartoons/etc. provide you with a laugh or two – and/or open your eyes to some stark realities – then we consider that a victory. So, when things tend to get a bit overwhelming, we believe it’s best to remember that Humor is Waaaayyyyy better than Hatred…which is contrary to what the world wants you to believe. And we hope you see the Sunday Funnies as a refreshing oasis in the middle of a parched, dry, and increasingly dark world that we’re living in. As always, we remind you: As difficult as things might appear, Evil Always Overplays its Hand…And Righteousness Prevails. Thanks again for joining us on this crazy journey we’re on and remember America Was Built by the Brave, Not by the Fearful… *********************************** How to Do More For the Environment Than All the Elitists in Davos…       ********************************* California is Saying Reparations of $5 Million for Slavery Should Be Paid to Every Black Adult       *************************************** As San Francisco Prepares to Pass a Law Giving $5 Million in Reparations to Every Black Adult…     ************************************** Reasonable Terms White People Might Consider Over Reparations        ************************************** Remember This?       ********************************* Meanwhile, as Democrats Get Closer to Removing Stinky Joe from Office…       ************************************* How Guys Can Become Instantly Attractive to Girls Today       *********************************** It Even Works for Beavis and Butthead       ************************************ And While We’re On the Subject of Gas Stoves…       ********************************** Guy Humor that Even Girls Find Funny       *********************************** More Guy Humor…LOL!       ********************************** And From Humor We Often Get Wisdom       ********************************* Hey! Michael Jackson Never Needed Roller Skates to Do the “Moon Walk” …Look Closely       ************************************ At the Current Pace We’re On, Here’s What to Expect in the Future       ********************************* Just As True Today As It Was in 2020…       *********************************** And as a Result of 2020… (funny/not funny)       ******************************* Kids/Millennials/Gen Z… Ask Your Parents and Grandparents About This       *********************************** We All Have That One Friend Who…       ********************************** How Liberals Responded to Russian Hockey Players (Ivan Provorov) Refusal to Participate in ‘Pride Month’ Because of His Religious Beliefs       ******************************** When Confusion Arises Over Japanese Origami             *********************************** One of the Drawbacks of Not Learning from Your Mistakes…       ******************************* A “Hat Tip” to All You Conspiracy Theorists Out There…Stay Pure       *********************************** And to Those Who Are Easily Confused…       ********************************** Even the Care Bears Are Smart Enough to Know What Most Governments Are Attempting to Do       ********************************** So, When the New World Order Creepy Globalists Tell You to Eat Bugs, Remember…       ************************************** To Those Who Actually Think the Elites at the (WEF) in Davos Want to Save the World from “Climate Change” … Show Them This       ********************************* *********************************   That’s all for this week’s edition of the Sunday Funnies. And throughout the Political Chaos of 2023, you can expect us to poke fun at the headline grabbers every weekend, as usual. However, if you want to see more risqué and/or R-Rated memes you can find them (HERE). As always, we hope you enjoy our memes/cartoons/rants etc. and that they bring a smile to your face. We definitely love to hear your comments so keep ‘em coming. And although the world seems pretty dark these days, we encourage you to see why you have a lot to hope for in 2023 and beyond (HERE). In the meantime, be sure to share these funnies with friends and family members. Caution: They may get offended. But remind them…It’s important to laugh together and laugh often. And be sure to tell them… We’re Not Just About Finance. See You Next Sunday… Invest with confidence. Sincerely, James Vincent The Reverend of Finance Copyright © 2023 It's Not Just About Finance, LLC, All rights reserved. You are receiving this email because you opted in via our website. Read the full article

[bucketsquid]

There's some blatant misinformation here. Yes, Jelfonzo's shirt says "Fuck you", yes, Marina's splat zones joke is about masturbation, but I really don't like people just outright... making things up about lore. I hope you don't mind too much.

Those are pelvic fins that Big Man walks on. While manta rays lack these, the Spotted eagle ray does have a good example of them. Big Man lacks a few traits that manta rays do: he doesn't have the large cephalic fins that genus Mobula often has, and his body patterning feels closer to the Spotted eagle's. Either way... those aren't claspers, claspers are much smaller and aren't shaped like pelvic fins. (cw for reproductive anatomy of cartilaginous fish lol?)

It's also possible that in the process of evolution, Splatoon's manta rays mutated pelvic fins for better walking. Or maybe Big Man isn't full-blooded manta ray? Who knows. But Splatoon's interpretations of real-world species are almost never 1:1.

The fishhook detail is "to attract the opposite sex", e.g. it's a cute shiny charm meant to attract potential love interests. (Inklings do like shiny sparkly things.) It's not inherently sexual at all, and Capt3 was 14 in Splat1, so... I'd hope not!

Callie's hypnoshades'd tattoos are on her stomach/hip.

Frye chatter is Frye chatter, it's not English. Sounds kind of similar but we have no idea what it means.

We have the lyrics for Nasty Majesty; the line in question is Purasuti purasuti / Jangasoju fasuti. I love the meme but it's... not explicit, inherently.

"Like, a fictional octopus-girl's crotch is visible" Where/when? We can see a lot of Marina's torso and hips in her outfits, but "crotch" = area between the legs specifically.

Salmon turning red isn't "sexual arousal". IRL it's part of their hormonal metamorphosis into maturity; they only reproduce at the very end of their lives. Also, it's stylized cartoon stuff. A child character turning red when they display power and being fired-up makes sense. (Splatwiki refers to it multiple times as "a young Salmonid" and never as an adult.)

Pearl also has aspects of kink in her Grand Festival outfit, it isn't just Big Man.

I would also debate the nature of sanitized goop / ink and that some forms of it do have blood/gore in it through implication. It's not explicit but it's quite likely given Octo Expansion lore. The graphic nature of how test subjects are culled is not visibly seen ingame, but we can make inferences from it.

The E10+ setting is a comfortable catchall for violence, dark themes, a few swears or swear-adjacent words, mild sexuality, and alcohol/drug use. It seems pretty reasonable for the Splatoon series so far to use it so it can tell the stories it wants to tell: I sincerely doubt that Marina's the only reason why the series is rated E10+, what with the darker content in Salmon Run, Octo Expansion and Rise of the Mammalians.

things you can do with an E10+ ESRB label:

Use of the uncensored words "Ass," "Bitch," and "Shit", with other censored swears allowed

Mild amounts of red blood, with other colours being allowed more (cephalopod blood is blue, no the ink is not blood, if it was, the amount of it shown in game would need a T rating even if its a different colour)

Sexual innuendos/references (Marina's outfits, literally any of them, would not fly in a rated E game, fun fact)

Partial Nudity

Alcohol/tobacco use

Games with an E10+ label:

Portal 2, which has a lot of discussion on how GladOS went crazy and murdered everyone (extreme over simplification)

Minecraft, with lots of killing of animals and people (villagers/pillagers) allowed, but theres no blood so

Shadow the Hedgehog. they killed that kid.

The E10+ label is pretty weird as its one of the lesser used ones, the first game to use the label was donkey kong jungle beat. other games that use it are much more fucked up.

It's kind of odd and feels almost more restrictive than just E, because a lot of the concepts are pretty vague and what counts as "mild" you know.

There's no reason for an entry in a series to have a higher rating, Brawl was set to rated T while all other games were less, but usually the lower the rating the more it sells, though the nintendo demographic is getting older.

The rating also doesnt apply to post launch content, meaning a dlc can be rated separately while not compromising the sales of the base game. Most likely splatoon wont make it out of E10+ still though.

[thegrimreaper-probably]

BRAINS! by Aurelio Voltaire

(gender neutral reader is call it/ y/n) Alien Reader x Gravity Falls

Really quick trigger warning for blood/gore!

“HIIII Candy! Want to hang out with me?” I ask as I role off the couch.

“Oh I can’t right now Mabel. Me and Grenda are school shopping tomorrow so we have to go to bed early. Maybe next time?” I say okay and hang up. Maybe Dipper wants to play!

“Hey-!”

“Sorry Mabel, can’t talk. I have to help Ford with something.” Dipper opens the vending machine and leaves.

“Ughhhhhh.” I lay face down on the floor.

“What’s wrong little dudetta.” Sues asks.

“Everyone’s busy with boring stuff.” I mumble.

“Bummer, can you hand me that hammer?” He ask I get up and hand it to him.

“Welp I guess I’ll find waddles, Byebye!” I wave.

“Bye-.” I run upstairs and find Waddles sleeping. I lay on top of him but he gets up and leaves.

“Not you too waddles.” I sigh and look outside, the sun was setting as a huge green thing flys by.

“Woah!” I run downstairs and out the house into the woods. I fallow the smoke to an open area to see a thing? It’s hair was green with black eyes and it was very tall.

“Well hello there little girl. Now don't be shy. Step right up, I'm a reasonable alien! Don't be frightened by the look in my eye!” It says I walk a little closer and wave. It grabs my hand and pulls me closer it’s flips me upside down and shakes me. Then tries to look in my ear, it must be some alien greeting!

“I’m Mabel Pines! Did you say you were an alien?!” It puts me down and looks down at me.

“Yeah, I'm just your average ev- good meteor from outta the sky! Well could you help me? I'm just shy and scared in this…” It pauses probably not know where it is.

“This is Earth! You never said what your name was. Is it like super hard to say? Cause I bet I could say it!” I jump excitingly.

“Oh where are my manners? My name is y/n. If you don’t mind me asking what are you doing here, alone?”

“Oh well my friends didn’t want to play with me, so I guess I’m here.” I shrug.

“Well as you can see that the trip has left me tired and drained.” Y/n says. It sits down with tired eyes.

“What can I get you? Water? Glitter Brownes?” I ask, maybe I can get waffles?

“Oh well I don’t really eat that stuff.” Y/n says sadly.

“How bout we make a deal? I’ll play with you forever or as much as you want, and you get me some food?” I nod.

“Of course! I mean it would be fun to be friends with an alien!” I says.

“So why don't you be a pal? And bring me some brains.” I shake my head no.

“I can’t do that!” I go to walk away but it stops me.

“But it won’t hurt! I promise! All I do is take a memory, like from when they were babies.” It says with pleading eyes.

“But people need their memories!” I says back.

“Well of course but no one remembers being a baby. Do you?” I think about it, my oldest memory being photo day at school.

“Well no. Where do I even go?” I says.

“Go down to Wendy’s place. See the dull expression on her face? You'd be doing her a favor if you brought her to me! She ain’t using her brain she’s just watching TV!” It says with a smile.

“Okay I’ll be back, you promise it won’t hurt?” I wait for answers before moving away.

“Not at all! Then we can play.” I walk to Wendy’s home and tell her to come with me. I mean y/n wouldn’t lie! I bring her and y/n does their thing.

“See she’s fine!” I look at Wendy, she looks normal.

“Now can we play?” I ask.

“Not yet I’m still hungry. Go down to Mr.McGucket. He hasn't had a thought since '43. His brain is the portrait of atrophy. He ain't using it, why not give it to me?” I nod and grab him, I mean there’s no harm!

“Brains, brains I won't lie I'll eat their brains 'til they're zombified. Sure they might think it's deranged but they won't give it a thought. After I've eaten they're brain. Brains, brains, It's okay It's not a matter if it isn't gray. And if at first they thinks it's strange. They won't think twice, if they don't have a brain!” I sing as I wait for the kid.

“Still hungry?” She ask, I nod my head and begin to talk.

“Go down to the Greasy Dinner, my fortune cookie says that I just can't stop. I'll suck the coffee right out of their heads. And half an hours later, I'm hungry again.” The kid brings a old women with an lazy eye and a lumberjack.

“Creep into the donut stop. Sneak in, tip-toe past the cop. Pick me up a cruller and a cupful of tea. And any other sweetbreads you happen to see!” She leaves again and I make the fools dances as I sing.

“Brains, brains, I won't lie, I'll eat their brains 'til they're zombified. Sure they might think it's deranged but they won't give it a thought. After I've eaten they're brain. Brains, brains, It's okay it's not a matter if it isn't gray. And if at first they thinks it's strange. They won't think twice. If they don't have a brain!” She brings more then leaves again as I jam out again.

“Brains, Brains, I love em, I need them! My tummy jumps for joy when I eat ‘em! Big ones, fat ones, short ones, tall ones, They're so delectable, especially the small ones.” As she brings me Bud Gleeful, Grenda, Sheriff Blubs, Deputy Durland and Gideon Gleeful. Each Brain I grow bigger and grow in knowledge.

“No time to cook ‘em in a skillet! My belly's rumblin', I got a need to fill it. I don't fry em, the heat will only shrink ‘em! I'll just grab my self a straw and I drink ‘em!!!” Now she back, she rubs her arm.

“Are you still hungry? Cause that the whole town. And you said we’d play.” She says.

“You've been swell to go around. And bring me every single brain in town…But with all these brains, I can't help but think! That there isn't three left out there to drink.” I get close to girl and smile.

“Now fess up kid, come on, heck. Is there people that you're trying to protect? Bring them down here to meet their end. And I promise I'll be your bestest friend. Brains, brains, I won't lie, I'll eat their brains 'til their zombified. Sure they might think it's deranged. But they won't give it a thought. After I've eaten her brain.” I smirk down at her as she freezes. I know I should play with dinner but what’s the harm in a little fun?

“You tricked me!” She steps back.

“No no! I just need them so I can be your best alien friend! We can play till your days come to a end!” She starts to run away but I have the lifeless fool’s chase her down. I stand to my full size, and laugh.

“HELP! GRUNKLE FORD! GRUNKLE STAN! DIPPER!” I hear Mabel yell as I run downstairs to see Ford and Stan wondering what wrong. Mabel slams the door close and locks it.

“Mabel if this is about snakes not having arms.” Ford says.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She yells Stan walks over to her.

“Kid what’s happened out there?” He asks

“I feed the town to an alien monster and now it’s after us!” She blurts out.

“An alien?” I ask.

“You did what?” Ford asks.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean it! Y/n said we could be friends but that they were hungry. I didn’t know this would happen!” Mabel says as she hug me.

“What happened to the town’s people then?” I ask.

“They’re zombified! Y/n controls them! They’re coming this way!” She let’s go of me and turns to Ford for some answer.

“No alien is going to mess with this family.” Stan says as he grabs a bat.

“What’s the aliens name again?” Ford ask an kneel down to Mabel.

“Y/n.” She says.

“Oh god, okay kids go into the basement. We’ll deal with this.” He stands up and opens the vending machine.

“No this is my fault I want to help.” Mabel says and doesn’t move.

“It’s to dangerous.” Ford says.

“Grunkle Ford, we’ve dealt with a lot. I think we can handle this.” I say, I usually don’t stand up against him but the towns in big trouble.

“Dipper you don’t understand. This has happened before, this beast will eat and eat. It controls their victim’s meaning it knows everything about this town. It knows where we are and how to get in.” He says and pushes near the door.

“So if it get you we’re over then!” I says.

“Kids he’s rights.” Stan says agreeing with Ford.

“I’m willing to take that risk for you two!” He says.

“Well I’m not! We need a plan!” Mabel yells back.

“You sure do talk a lot.” Y/n says as she breaks the window.

“AHHHH.” We scream.

“Oh come on I’m not that scary. Why not just get it over with, I promise it doesn’t hurt. Plus there’s nowhere to hide. The house is surrounded by the town’s people.” It says as it head rest on the window. Ford shots it’s face and it heals back.

“Did you just shot me? That weakly little gun has nothing on me.” It says with a smirk as it plucks the gun crushing it.

“Y/n go home.” Ford Pines says.

“I don’t think so. I mean I kinda like it here. Plus I don’t want to break my little promise to Mabel.” I say with a fake pout.

“The deals off!” Mabel yells.

“Well it makes no difference, you lack a brain to eat.” I say with a shrug.

“She has a brain.” Mason Pines or more commonly know as Dipper says.

“Well of course it just covered in glitter. I don’t know how you did that. It’s disgusting though.” I say with a fake gag.

“Mabel what the heck?” Dipper turns to her with disbelief.

“I want to see if-.” She say but gets cut off by Ford says.

“Kids we’re fighting a monster from outer space!” He yells.

“Right you are! You know I bet you’d taste wonderful.” I lick my lips I go to rip the wall more but get blocked by something.

“Y/N!” I turn around to see Bill Cipher.

“And you must be that Bill guy that Gideon was scared of?” I get up and it float to face me.

“That right names, Bill Cipher! The one who’s going to take over this place.” He says.

“Well sorry but the jobs taken.” I smirk back.

“It's funny how dumb you are to think that I can be replace.” I growl.

“Ha- you got some nerve talkin to me like that.” I say.

“Actually I have a your nerves!” I raise my eyebrow.

“What-.” He snaps his finger and has a pile of my nerves.

“Byebye!” I fall to my knees as he sets me on fire and returns people’s brains.

“AHHHHH!” The Pines scream.

“Uhh.” Pine Tree says.

“Oh hey Sixer!” I wave over.

“Bill.” He says angrily.

“Aww come on I just saved your pathetic life.” I say.

“Why?” Pine Tree questions.

“Well Pine tree I want to be the one to kill ya!Can’t have some nobody take my job as rightful king!” I say and laugh.

“Thank you.” Shooting Star says I turn to her.

“Shooting Star next time don’t make deals unless it’s with me. Anyhow Remember: reality is an illusion. The universe is a hologram. Buy gold. Bye!" I leave.

“So do we put them back home?” Dipper says as the town lays on our lawns.

“Let’s leave them.” Stan says I role my eyes.

“We can’t leave them here it’s suspicious.” I say and grab my teleportation gun.

“Fine but I’m not helping.” He walks off to bed.

“Mabel you did the right thing coming to us for help. Next time just think twice about monster and aliens. They aren’t ones to trust.” I say she nods. I shoot my gun and teleport people home. It takes a minute but it’s worth it. I head of to the basement and add to the journal.

“Bring me they’re brains.”

[ejzah]

In honor of NCIS LA finally getting a Halloween episode can you do a drabble about Densi's first halloween as a couple please?

A/N: As usual, I’m on top of things.

***

“This is completely ridiculous,” Kensi complained, carefully picking her way down the stairs. One of the cheap heals that came with her costume caught on the edge of the bottom stair and she stumbled a little.

Deeks looked up as she crossed the last few feet into the living room. His face lit up, hair defying the large amounts of gel he’d used to slick in back in a suitable Danny style.

“You look perfect!” he exclaimed, setting down an armful of snacks on the table and coming to closer to examine her. “You make an amazing Sandy.”

“You just like the tight pants.” She crossed her arms, glaring at him as she gave him a once over. He wore jeans, a perfectly white t-shirt, and leather jacket. Aside from the color of his hair, he made a decent Danny Zuko.

“It is a perk,” Deeks agreed, continuing to set up last minute things before trick-or-treaters started coming.

The first year she found out he handed out candy and decorated for Halloween, she’d been surprised given his usual laissez faire attitude towards holidays. Now she just accepted it as one of his many eccentricities.

“I mean, I think I did I pretty good job of finding costumes that met your specifications. You’re fully clothed, it’s not a cartoon character, it’s not stupid or vulgar, and it has nothing to do with sci-fi.”

“I suppose it’s not that bad,” Kensi admitted reluctantly. “But why do I have to where a wig and you don’t?”

“Sandy’s hair is iconic,” he replied like it was obvious. “No body cares what Danny looks like. Hey, I got to grab something upstairs, here’s the candy if kids start showing up.”

He pushed an overflowing bowl of candy into her arms and dropped a kiss on her cheeks before racing up stairs. Sighing, Kensi flopped on the couch-or at least tried to. The high waist, cinched belt, and skin tight fabric of her Sandy costume made it difficult to move.

Slouching, she crossed her legs, a red shoe dangling off her foot and plucked a Reese’s from the bucket on her lap. Deeks came back down a few minutes later, a tote bag in one hand.

“You’re not eating all the candy, are you?” he asked, heading for the TV.

“Of course not,” Kensi replied, tucking a few rappers in between the couch cushions. Deeks chuckled, but didn’t call her on it, busy popping a DVD into the player.

“What are you doing?” The chocolate had greatly improved her mood. A did the sight of Deeks bending over in skin tight jeans.

“Well, I figured since I guilted you into handing out candy with me, that the least I could do was keep you entertained,” he explained, holding up a DVD case. “80s movie night?”

“Is that The Breakfast Club?” Kensi asked, sitting up in sudden excitement.

“Yep. I’ve also got a couple of classic 80s horror movies my gore loving ladybird, Grease.” He grinned. “And Dirty Dancing.”

“It’s perfect,” Kensi said, reaching for Deeks. When he was close enough, she slid her red-tipped fingers around his neck and kissed him firmly. “Thank you.”

“No problem,” he told her with a softer smile.

The doorbell rang and he straightened, smoothing his hair back into place.

“There’s our first customer!” He grabbed a spare bowl of candy, heading for the door. “Save me a few KitKats,” he called back.

Pushing herself off the couch, Kensi followed after him as he opened the door to a crowd of mini witches, zombies, and superheroes.

Maybe it wasn’t so bad, she decided, leaning against doorjamb while the opening theme of The Breakfast Club played in the background.

***

A/N: Can I be perfectly honest? I’ve never actually seen The Breakfast Club. Also, thanks to @mashmaiden for suggesting the idea of a movie night.

Thanks for the prompt!

[imma-potatoo]

For the bthb, may I request Logan and U!Patton with Thrown Down The Stairs? Maybe with some Remus or Janus comfort later? Idk, I just like your writing style and am crazy for Logan angst.

@badthingshappenbingo

Send me a prompt with a character! Please specify ships! No romantic prinxeity, r*mr*m or U!Janus and U!Logan please!

You wanted Logan angst? You got Logan angst~

Prompt: thrown down the stairs.

Warnings: U!Patton, blood, gore, choking, scratching at throat, concussion, thrown down stairs, pinning, graphic abuse, punching, slapping, ask to tag

(I'm really sorry this took so long. Wifi problems and family shit)

-----

Love

----

Logan walked out of his room, humming a small song (Crofters the Musical, but that was only for him to know) dress shoes clicking softly on the wooden floors while he skimmed over the book in his hands. The mindscape was just as bustling as usual, he could hear Janus lecturing Remus in the darker half of the mind about how stealing Roman’s sword and turning it into a dagger was inappropriate and that he’ll have to make Roman a new one. Roman himself was sulking in his room playing Burn from Hamilton on loop because “Remus is dead to me like Hamilton was dead to Eliza”…. Logan didn’t get it. Virgil’s music was turned on max; like always but this time he was trying to drown out Roman’s complaints with My Chemical Romance. Patton was most likely baking in the kitchen once again.

Logan flipped open to the page he left off on; he had just started this book so he wasn’t too far in. He couldn’t help the grin that spread on his face as he started to read,

The person who was supposed to love me the hardest-the most unconditionally-has always wanted me gone. No matter how hard I tried to be perfect. Now, this boy-who knows all my imperfections and has seen all my hurt laid bare-wants me to sta- Logan’s reading was interrupted by a door clicking open.

Logan looked up to see Patton closing his bedroom door. An ear to ear grin plastered on his face, it was a little too much teeth for his comfort. Patton locked eyes with the blue side, “Hiya kiddo!”

Logan slipped his bookmark back into the thin pages, “Greetings Patton.” Logan waited for a second or two for Patton to walk beside him; after all, when someone comes out of their door, you have to wait for the other to join you on your walk.

And Patton did, they started towards the staircase; Logan tracing the book pages with his fingers. “So! Where ya headed kiddo?!” Logan had always thought Patton was a little too cheery for his tastes, but that was just the father’s personality, he couldn’t change that.

“I’m headed to the imagination to read,” for a brief second, Logan forgot who I was talking to, “It's actually quite an interesting book! The Dangerous Art of Blending In is considered a must-read for pride month and is based on the author's true story,” Logan continued to talk; eyes twinkling with excitement and pure joy as he went on to explain the main character’s arc so far.

The blue side steeled his expression to his happy grin, “That sounds interesting kiddo! Can I see it?”

Logan grew stiff, but continued walking with Patton until they made it to the top of the stairs, Logan shifted his eyes downward and handed the book to Patton. Morality swiped the book straight out of Logan’s hands, he pulled it open to a random page and started to read. Logan watched in horror as the older side’s expression shifted from mild curiosity to confusion, to disgust, and finally to anger.

“Why are you reading these horrible things, Logan?” Patton’s smile was gone, eyes cold and disapproving as he stared into Logan’s eyes. “This is something Remus would read. Why. Are. You. Reading. It.” Patton stood tall, teeth formed into a sneer as he stepped closer.

Logan took a small step backward, “I-I-”

“Shut up.” Logan hit the wall when Patton hissed through his teeth, “Come on Lo-Lo! If you read stuff like this, you’re just as bad as Remus and Janus! You don’t want to be like them, do you?” Patton was inches away from Logan’s face. His breath hot on his skin, raising the hair on the back of his neck.

Logan gulped, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down. “W-well, I thought that Even and Henry’s story was a sweet story about overcoming hardships, even when you’re put in a bad si-” The stinging pain of Patton’s hand hitting his face stopped him in his tracks. Tears leaked down as Logan raised his hand to his cheek.

Logan looked at Patton with wide eyes, “y-yo-” The blunt end of a punch struck his face, Logan could only stand in shock as he felt his lip start to leak crimson, “Patton stop!”

The so-called father pushed his hand against Logan’s neck, keeping him in place even while Logan clawed at his hand and own throat, attempting to pry Patton off. His nails dug into his flesh, small warm droplets of blood pricking out of the skin as Patton tightened his hold.

“You, Lo-Lo-Bear, need to learn when to shut up~” Logan was sure that his neck was going to be bruised, all he could do was wheeze a suffocated breath in response. Patton applied his sugar-sweet smile once more, looking into Logan’s eyes with a twisted fascination.

Logan attempted to speak, he knew that he couldn’t. But words were his weapon. Without his voice he was helpless, and he refused to give in to the father figure’s torment. Patton had always been particularly touchy, touching them when it wasn’t necessary. Hands grazing over their shoulders or swiping things from their hand to look it over. Patton had also always been particularly violent. Pushing them against walls over little things and whispering threats. It didn’t make these situations any less terrifying though. And this was the first time Patton had taken it this far.

Logan’s hands were covered in blood. His blood. Gore covered his fingers and Patton’s hand, a few small beads hitting the floor; as well as Patton’s cartoon-themed sneakers. Long thin scratches ran up and down his neck, his nails had thick pieces of skin underneath the nails.

Patton raised an eyebrow at the side’s attempt to pry him off, he huffed a breath and let go of Logan’s neck.

Logic fell against the wall, hands immediately wrapping around the sluggish bleeding at his neck, Logan breathed in short ragged breaths eyes wide and staring at the floor. Breathing in the sweet addiction of oxygen.

Patton smiled, eyes skewed shut while the side on the floor held himself tightly. “There! Didn’t you learn your lesson kiddo?” Patton waited a second or two for Logan to respond, his breathing calm and steady as he swirled the crimson liquid on his hand. “Right kiddo?” Patton bore his cold eyes onto the crumbled side, he barely waited a second before seizing Logan’s wrist and pulling him to his feet.

The cyan side held Logan by his tie, right in front of the staircase. Logan could barely process anything before the side in front of him smiled, locking his eyes. And then, he let go and pushed Logan down the steps.

Logan fell, hitting almost every stair on his way down. He could feel his blood vessels burst as his arms scraped on the wooden railing, splinters indenting into his flesh. His head spun when it hit the stairs, glasses flying off. Logan could barely tell what was happening to him as he hit his head repeatedly, he knew that he heard a crunch from his left arm and right leg when he hit the bottom landing.

Logan laid on his face, breathing hard and rapidly. His mind was fogged over, no coherent thought could pass through as the ringing sound that suddenly plagued his mind filled his senses. He couldn’t hear his father figure climb down the steps, taking care to step over the blood spatters that covered them.

Patton poked Logan in the ribs with his shoe, giggling when the side groaned in pain. “You really should be more careful kiddo! Stairs can be pretty dangerous you know!” The cyan side took one last look at his victim before pulling Logan’s book from his pocket.

Patton opened the book to its center point, before grabbing each side of the novel and ripping it in half. Pages floated down like butterfly wings, gracefully falling as they surrounded the broken side in bitter mockery of the book. Patton threw what was remaining of the book onto Logan, his demeanor just as peppy and upbeat as ever, even while covered in another’s blood.

“You really need to be more careful with your possessions, Logic, such a tragedy, you know I love a good book.” Patton walked back up the staircase to his bedroom, while Welcome to the Black Parade blasted from Virgil’s speakers, Logan barely responded to the father figments door slamming.

Logan had no idea of how long he let his blood stain the carpet, but his mind grew even fuzzier as the room grew black. He allowed the sweet bliss of sleep to cloud his function telling him to stay awake. He closed his eyes, only to have someone shake him.

“-GAN! LOGAN WAKE UP!” The panicked voice of the deceitful side flooded his head, he tried to force his eyes open; muscles spasming. “There we go! Come on starlight! Stay awake! Remus is coming back with the medkit! Just stay with me!” Logan followed his voice, the smoothness and composed attitude of the yellow side was gone. Logan hated seeing the silver-tongued side like that.

“I-I see you have a copy of The Dangerous Art of Blending In! It’s such a good book right! I l-ove how the author wrote Henry! Don’t you? Come on Logan, stay awake!” Logan looked into the terrified side’s eyes. The enchanting yellow and brown eyes kept his focus even if they were clouded in fear, he wondered why he never noticed the flecks of green surrounding the slivered pupil before.

“I GOT THE MEDKIT!” The horse voice of Remus broke his concentration on the pretty eyes, why did everyone call Janus a monster anyway? Was it the scales? Logan could only wonder as the two dark sides hastily applied the first aid. Voices scared and rushed as they faded into the background, Logan could only focus on how Remus’ mustache was perfectly curled into its position, even when it was soaked in tears. Tears? Why were they crying? Patton said that they were monsters, and monsters don’t cry. Then again, monsters don’t help people either… 

Logan watched the two sides dig into the kit as fast as they could. Janus even removed his gloves.

Logan gazed at them tiredly, mouth lightly sagged open, “There we go! I think we can move him now Jan!” “Good! Let’s get him out of here before Patton comes back, I think he did this…”

Logan could feel his body raising to meet the ruffles of Remus’ tunic. The small teeth that embellished the ends of the fasteners rubbed against his shoulder. He didn’t have the energy to make any noise as the two sides took him back to their side.

He doubted he would ever return to the picture-perfect family he once belonged to ever again. He had his actual family, ready to help him through everything.

Janus bought him a new copy of his book too.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Watching horror movie hcs with the Sdr2 boys please!! You don't have to do all of them but teruteru and Gundham are big important 2 me,, ty in advance!!

Kazuichi

“AHH!!!”

“Kaz, that was just the opening title...”

“B-But still! The music scared me!” The mechanic huffed as he curled up next to you, wrapped in a blanket. He was insistent on watching this horror movie with you, thinking he could just “man-up”.

But you knew that no matter which one you chose, he’d still end up screaming like a girl half the time.

So you decided to bear with it, keeping your arm wrapped around him and letting him cling to you whenever. In all honesty it was cute seeing him unconsciously cuddling close to you whenever he thought another scare was coming.

You were used to it, considering you’ve been the more “protective” one in the relationship.

About halfway through the movie, you felt Kazuichi trembling violently against you, which made you look at him with concern. Maybe the movie was getting to be too much. “You wanna pause-?”

“AH! Oh..th-that was just you..” He blushed slightly, before sighing. “Yeah..I..I kinda need a break. Sorry..I wish I wasn’t such a goddamn wuss all the time.”

“That’s alright.” Pausing the movie, you kissed his forehead. “You know I won’t judge you for being scared, right?”

With a light smile, he just nuzzled into your shoulder, while you chuckled and put your arms around his still blanketed form., hugging him closer.

You’ll give him time to calm down before you resumed the movie.

..........

Gundham

“Hmm, how about this one?” Gundham mused as he looked at the horror movie’s description on the streaming service, eyes widening as he read it thoroughly. “Fascinating..a film that’s supposedly cursed to those who dare watch it. But no matter, for the potential evil stored within this movie cannot-”

“I was thinking of this one, actually.” You took the remote and changed it to show a more cartoonish Halloween movie.

“What? Cartoons? Oh....and they even have those anthromorphic animals I so greatly despise..” He grumbled, crossing his arms and leaning back on the couch with a slight pout. “Such an insult to the true nature of this earth’s creatures.”

“....Gundham, you didn’t bat an eye when Chiaki introduced you to Animal Crossing. So that’s no excuse.”

“.....a-ah..that’s um..true.” Embarrassed, he covered his blush with his now orange scarf--decorated with bats and webs. His eyes then shifted to yours. “You must forgive my poor memory.”

“Don’t sweat it.” You wrapped an arm around him, taking amusement in seeing his blush only worsen at the closeness. “C’mon, this is a cult classic. We’ll watch it once and we’ll never have to see it again. I promise.”

After debating for a few moments, the breeder gave in and sighed, letting his scarf go. “Very well. Then we shall watch this cartoonish “cult classic” to the fullest.”

.........

Nagito

Least to say, watching a horror movie marathon with Nagito was...quite uneventful.

He seemed completely unfazed by the gore, jumpscares, and everything else regardless of which ones you chose.

You didn’t let it bother you, knowing he’s been desensitized by a lot of terrible things he experienced due to his bad luck. So you weren’t surprised he didn’t react much to the grisly death scenes or scares.

By the end of the last movie, you were wrapped up in his jacket. And as the credits rolled you glanced at him, seeing him hugging himself in only a white shirt and jeans.

He noticed your lingering stare and flashed a tiny smile. “Sorry, maybe you should’ve watched this marathon with Sonia..instead of someone as boring as-”

However, he was silenced as you brought him into a hug, letting him lay down on top of you. With a chuckle, you kissed the top of his head. “It’s okay, I still enjoyed watching them with you. Plus you made me feel a lot better since you gave me your jacket. So thank you.”

The lucky student was surprised, but happy nevertheless. He snuggled against you and closed his eyes, fully content. “No problem.”

............

Teruteru

“AVRIL LAVIGENE!!!”

“Again with the celebrity references..” You sighed as the small chef hugged you tightly, shaking like a leaf. His hat had been long forgotten, having fallen to the floor after the movie scared him.

The two of you decided to pick a random horror film to watch--and it so happened to be one involving cannibalism.

Poor Teruteru was startled by every scare, though you just kept your arm wrapped around him, kissing the top of his head. The fact he didn’t make any coy remarks about how close you two were was odd, but you said nothing about that.

Soon enough, you managed to get through the movie, with him blurting out at least five more celebrity names out of fear. After that, you put on a lighthearted cooking show to help him settle down.

“I-I probably won’t look at red meat...th-tha same way ev’r again after dat..” He mumbled, his accent coming out in full swing as he still cuddled against you. “Gotta make sure i-it ain’t human..”

“Don’t worry.” You hugged him closer. “If it makes you feel better I’ll go check the labels.”

[fakeloveaskblog]

Janus, have you and Remus hung out other then when you go to fake therapy? You should ask him out? Keep it open, maybe not outright ask him for a date but to hang out!

(Words: 2140)

Janus: "Oh you know me anon. I am so totally known for asking people to hang out. Yes me and Remus have been eeeverywhere together /s No we have never hung out.......But I suppose you have been very wise so far. So I shall try and go ut of my comfort zone and ask him he would like to spend time together"

They were in that same spot they always stood after the fake therapy. Where they were supposed to part ways. Remus had his phone out, checking the bus times. Janus knew he had to say something now or else yet another week would pass and he would never have the courage to ask.

"Do ehm is you- fuck-" Janus wanted to smash his head open on a rock. He was a idiotic mess who couldn't even say a simple sentence.

"What?" Remus looked at him with a smile. Jan swore he had specifically practiced that smile so it made him melt internally every single time.

"Do you maybe possibly have anything to do today?"

"Oh yeah all booked up with exorcising demons out of old ladies' houses. you know how it is!" He let out a short screechy laugh "Come on Snakey y'know I don't have a job or any plans on robbing banks right now. Of course I'm free!"

"Noted. Then I am totally not asking you to perhaps do something like going to the movies?"

Remus' eyes widened and he shone up into a huge toothy smile "YES!" He grabbed Janus' hand while flapping with his other hand "You gotta be psychic or something! I've been wanting to see this movie made by a director I'm hyperfixating on but I didn't wanna go alone and my sister is still out of town SO this is great!!"

He didn't waste another second. He dragged Janus with him as he began to very quickly walk while continuing to stim.

All Janus could do was stare at their hands. Their palms pressed against each other. His love's thumb brushing up and down his skin. He had never been happier over forgetting his gloves at home.

His cheeks stayed rosy red the entire walk. It was like walking on air. He didn't even realize Remus was still speaking until they got the cinema.

"-And that's why I thought it would have been better if the hamster had died!" He concluded.

".............Fascinating" Janus replied hoping it was a good answer.

"I know right!"

He looked down and realized they were still holding hands. His happy expression instantly dropped as he let go of Janus like he was made of fire.

"Oh fuck buckets! I should have asked if you were okay with like ehhh touch beforehand! Now you're gonna cut my head off!" Remus gasped out.

"Indeed, I do now hate you and I have already hired an assassin to kill you" Janus replied sarcasticly "It's okay, I promise"

Remus let out a breathe of relief in the most cartoon balloon leaking air way possible. "Neat!"

It was 3 pm on a Thursday so there weren't any people in line. Remus didn't even give his friend a chance to pay for his own ticket. He also got a big ass popcorn and a bag of eyeball candies.

He dumped the snacks into the arms of Janus as his eyes caught on a poster on the wall advertising another movie. He jumped up and down while pointing at it, like the excitement was too much to be contained in his body.

"It's my sister! She told me she would be in this one!" The poster didn't show the actresse's face since she had on a cloke to look dark and myserious (tm) "That's her I swear on the last human tooth I have!"

"I believe you. You could be her perfect stunt double"

Remus shoot his arms out "That's what I've been saying too!!! You really are a psychic! Being a stunt double is literally the dream job! I get to pretend to be killed in so many ways! I get to jump off of buildings!! Sadly she mostly does dramas and romances and all that boring stuff"

"Well I for one would love seeing you get stabbed on film" He held his hand over his heart as he said it.

"Omg snakey!! Thank you!! Means a lot!"

He had that wide smile on his lips again. Janus wished he was able to make him smile like that every day.

"Oh the movie is starting soon! Ahhhh exciting! Horror really is the best genre!"

Janus paled "Horror?"

"Yeah! I told you all about the movie on the way here remember? You're okay with horror right?"

"O-Of course! I have watched halloween alien on elm street like 5 times!" He lied.

Remus chuckled "Sure sounds like it"

They went into the screening room. Ads were running on the big screen. They were the only ones there. Remus found their seats right at the back in a corner. He sat down and triumphantly put his feet on the seat in front of him.

"Look at that snakey! We've got the whole room to ourselves! Only...."

His eyes suddenly stopped and shifted to stare out into air. His happy expression slowly disappeared leaving a hollow look on his face. He moved his legs up to his chest and sat completely still.

".....Only us......"

Janus slumped down in the seat next to his. Remus leaned away in his seat so he was further from his friend.

"Indeed. I could poison you and no one would be here to stop me. But I won't...yet" He hoped a joke would make his love lighten up again.

Remus forced a halfhearted smile "Sure that"

The movie started. Janus was already stress eating popcorn from fear by the time the first scene had ended. Which only made him even more stressed over making Remus think he was a fat gluttonous disgusting mess! Which he was! But he didn't want him to know that!!

Whenever he glanced over to Remus he looked just the same, As if the movie was fucking mamma mia or something.

He didn't want to seem unclassy and close his eyes like a 5 year old so he tried to comb his hair in front of his eyes instead. He couldn't stop his racing heartbeat or his unsteady hands though. He didn't do well to loud sounds. Or screaming voices.

He jumped in his chair at an extra gory scare. The popcorn landed all over his body. His cheeks went red enough to be mistaken for a ladybug.

Remus glanced over at him "You don't have to hide that you're scared y'know. The audience reaction is like half the fun"

"Me? Scared? I haven't felt scared since I buried a body in 1967! This is just how I show my appreciation for movies!" He blurted out the lie in a panic.

His love threw his head back as he let out a loud laugh. He couldn't stop as he buried his head in his hands. His shoulders moved in rhytm to his giggles. It seemed to calm his nerves a bit.

"Holy shit snakey that was such a horrible lie! You're such a dork! I say that with affection I promise"

Janus couldn't help but chuckle along "Dork actually means something really dirty. I know since I was practically married to my dictionary when I was youn-"

"WHALE PENIS! I know!! You're the first one who also knows!"

"I suppose that means we're soulmates now" Janus couldn't help but say it.

"Penis soulmates!"

Janus sighed "Yes"

In the movie a man's torso was ripped from his body. Remus flapped his hands. Janus let out a quiet whimper.

"I could infodump a bit if that would make you less scared"

Janus leaned closer to respond but Remus instantly flinched back. He made sure to keep keeping his distance "I would love to hear"

He shone up into a smile. It wasn't quite as carefree and happy as the other ones but it was still his smile and Janus had caused it. It made him feel warm.

He started rambling about the director's other movies and how the themes tied in with this movie. About how the director had studied to be a doctor so he know enough about biology to make all of the gore extra realistic. About how the movie soundtrack's added to the scare even though they were often silly. All while stimming. Sometimes he went quiet to focus on the film while Janus curled in on himself and closed his eyes.

Honestly Janus could have heard him go on for hours but sadly the movie eventually ended. And they eventually got out of the cinema. And eventually the snacks the shared while sitting on a bench outside also ended. And the conversation died out.

It was only around 5 pm but the sky had already started to darken. The streetlamps were getting lit one by one, and a few people were standing in line for the next movie. Janus feared having to say goodbye.

Luckily he didn't have to as Remus quietly asked "Could you like follow me home? The apartement is only 15 minutes and a minor murder spree away"

"Of course!" He replied a bit too excitedly.

He made sure to not walk too close as to not make him flinch again. Remus started to subconsciously hymm on a song after some time of silence. Janus couldn't stop feeling over the moon at the fact that he was hanging out with someone! And he seemed to like him!! And he was in love with him no less!!!

"Snakey I think I gotta admit something kinda dorky-"

"Is it the murder in 1967? We've all been there"

"Actually it was in 1987. Okay but really.....The only friends I've ever really had has been my sister and my ex, and some online friends here and there I guess but we lost contact really quickly. What I mean is that I'm really rusty on this whole friend thing and I'm just glad that you don't get annoyed by my infodumping or stimming or....or the whole me!"

Janus' eyes widened and he slowly let up into a laugh "Oh! Oh I have been so worried for nothing then! I've never had any friends, at all! This was literally the first time I ever went to a movie with another person! We're the same!"

Remus giggled "We really are penis soulmates!"

"I am begging you to not let that become a thing"

"Too late! It already is! We're both friendless dorks you motherfucker!! Of course we're penis soulmates!"

Janus sighed "I am suddenly so glad we are close to your place so I can get away from you.....That was a lie"

Remus lightly punched his shoulder "Better be. Or else I'd have to kidnap you!"

He stopped in front of a series of building of obviously quite glamorous apartements. Janus was honestly starting to wonder if he had a sugar daddy and or sold drugs. Or else he had no idea how he could afford all of this.

They stopped right in front of the entrance. Remus crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. Janus fiddled with his sleeves. Neither of them wanted to say goodbye.

Janus shuly glanced at his love's face. His birtmarks which he so wanted to press kisses to. His fluffy hair he would love to nuzzle into. His full lips which he thought about running his finger over every time he looked at them. He was beautiful. Just beautiful.

"Sooo....I guess I will either see you in hell or in fake therapy next week?" Remus asked.

"For sure"

He awkwardly opened the door "Well I will see you then then!" He did fingerguns "Bye penis soulmate!"

Janus rolled his eyes while waving "Bye.....phallus companion!"

The door closed and he was left in the silence. It took a few second and then

"YES! OH I did it! I survived! Aphrodite would be so proud of me!!"

Janus had to sit down. He was going to explode. He couldn't stop moving his hands around. He was going to pass out. He had never been happier. He deserved a whole soup bowl of ice cream.

He took off his beanie to drag his hand through his hair. He felt breathless from happiness as he stared up at the sky. He had never felt more in love.

He looked at where he imagined you would stand if you had a corporeal body.

"So I suppose your advice worked quite well. It did sound like he wanted to hang out again...So anon....or whatever voice that is in my head that asks me things......Do you have any suggestions on what we should do on our next hangout?"

[kosmosguk]

Imaginary (m) | preview

Pairing: ghost Kim Taehyung x Reader 

Word Count: ?

Summary:  It’s been over 15 years since the first time you saw him. He had been the same age as you then, with somber eyes and a distinct splatter of red on his torn white shirt. When you realized nobody else but you could see him, you called him your imaginary friend. Several years later, you had almost forgotten your memory of him, until he shows up as the unexpected addition to the old abandoned house that you’ve moved into.

Warnings: death, gore, manipulation, abuse (both mental and physical), yandere themes, alcohol, explicit language, SMUT, reader and taehyung have sucky childhoods 

A/N: No idea when this will be released! I just wanted something spooky with taehyung as a breather from Lineage and this fic emerged (though I’m only 2k into writing it). Hopefully, this will be released by the end of the month, unless I get back into my creativity mode for Lineage. 

Your teeth roughly tore off the wrapper of the cherry sucker, spitting out the plastic into the palm of your hand and cramming it into the pocket of your jacket. It was chilly, and your fingers seemed to freeze themselves around the paper stick of the lollipop. You kicked out your feet, hearing the creak of the metal rings of the swing as it rattled under the shift in weight.

Your mother was late, again, and your daycare teacher had left to grab something from the classroom. All of your classmates had parents that picked them up on time, except for you. You huffed out an agitated gust of air, shivering slightly as you burrowed further into your coat. You wanted to go home, wanted to wear something warm and watch cartoons where brightly colored characters smiled and laughed and distracted you from how otherwise quiet the house was.

You were so bored.

The wind picked up, pushing strands of your hair wildly, and you glanced up. Your eyes widened at the figure huddled by the slides. You didn’t see him earlier. If you knew, you would’ve gone to play with him. You pushed yourself back in the swing before jumping off it, sneakers scraping against the rough playground floor as you landed.

The kid didn’t move as you got closer to him. The only thought you had as you got closer was whoa, the kid must be freezing. You were numbly cold in your thick coat, and your classmate was only wearing a white shirt. Maybe he lost his coat. You know if you lost your coat, your mom would be super mad. Was that why he was hiding under the slide? So his parents wouldn’t see him that he lost his coat. 

“Did you lose your coat?’’ you were standing behind him now.

He turned around. Huh? You never saw him before. Was he new? No, he must be part of a different grade since he looked older than you. Also, he was prettier than the other boys in your class, that was for sure, but his eyes looked a lot like the look your mom had whenever she drank some kind of strong-smelling liquid—you didn’t know what it was, but it smelled bad and she always got just a bit meaner after half the bottle was up—glanced at the framed picture of your dad…sad.

“No,’’ he spoke. He had a nice-sounding voice, you thought to yourself. Quiet and calm. “I’m not cold.’’

You wrinkled your nose. Was he some kind of superhuman? You shouldn’t ask. In the cartoons you watched, superhumans always went to huge lengths to make sure no one knew their real identity. You never really understood that. If you had magical powers, you would want everyone to know that you weren’t someone to be messed with. Your gaze fell down to his shirt, and your eyes widened at the sight. There was a large ripped hole in the middle of his shirt, right by the bold image of a cartoon Pomeranian, and you spotted the stain of red on his stomach. You knew that boo-boos hurt. You once fell down and scraped your knee; you remember, though you wished to forget, that you cried in front of your whole class and had been teased for being a crybaby for a week.

“Doesn’t that hurt?’’ you asked, pointing at his stomach. His gaze flickered down, and you felt even worse when you noticed that he even looked sadder than before. You quickly dropped your hand—your mom always told you that was rude, and after seeing the pretty boy look even more sad, you swore to yourself you’d never do it again.

“It doesn’t hurt… Not anymore,’’ the boy shrugged.

“Well,’’ you fumbled around in your pocket and pulled out another cherry sucker. “Candy always makes me feel better when I’m sad. Here, take it.”

You heard your name being called and looked towards the direction and spotted your mom waving at you. Without thinking further, you ran towards her. You didn’t notice how the sucker fell through the boy like he was nothing but wind and onto the ground.

“Who were you talking to?’’ she asked when you caught up to her side. You turned to point at the pretty boy, who was still watching you with somber eyes.

“A classmate. Can’t you see him?’’ you answered, grabbing onto her sleeve and tugging it. You crunched down on the cherry sucker, a dribble of red liquid oddly similar to the splatter on the boy’s shirt running down the corner of your mouth.

She looked at the direction you were pointing in, her eyes confused albeit the exhaustion in them. She reached out to wipe the saliva on your face.

“(Y/n), sweetie…,’’ her voice cut off as she glanced down on you in concern. Her finger was still pressed against your cheek, but the nail seemed to pinch your soft flesh. She was afraid to say the next words. Not with the mixture of concern, anxiety, and plain old fear that boiled unpleasantly in her throat. You glanced up at her, innocent eyes a sharp contrast with her own eyes.

She couldn’t say it. Couldn’t admit it to herself. She simply reached down and grasped your hand tightly, fingers stitching together just a bit too tightly to simply be the faint caress of a mother’s nature.

She pulled you away from the playground before you could take another look to see if your new friend was still there, leaving behind the words that she couldn’t bring herself to say in the chilling air.

Sweetie, there’s no one there.

[delimeful]

you will see a better day

donation drive commission for @starrykid with the prompt: Remus dealing with intrusive thoughts and the others helping him through it.

warnings: canon setting, intrusive thoughts (a fair amount), gore mentions, implications of thoughts of self harm, Remus Going Thru It

-

Before, whenever he had a Bad Day, it was just more fuel on the trash fire that was his brain. 

It was routine: Remus would wake up with a litany of grotesque images on the back of his eyelids, present every time he blinked or squeezed his eyes shut in frustration. These thoughts weren’t the fun kind of gross, the type that was fascinating or funny. They weren’t fun because he didn’t choose them, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get rid of them if he didn’t like them. 

Guess that was how everyone else felt about you. Remus mashed a pillow over his own face as though it would muffle his own mind. What a stupid thought. He was a luxury few could afford, thank-you-very-much!

Back then, as soon as possible, he would find someone else in the Mindscape to bother, because if he had to deal with the awful thoughts carving and chipping away at the inside of his skull, it was only fair to share. 

That was before, when things had been black and white and he could be a monster all he pleased because it wasn’t like anyone else thought differently. It wasn’t like Thomas thought differently. 

Until he did.

And now they were all in one muddled up Mindscape and the others were trying, making an effort to clot their own bad habits and setting a place for him at the table. It was slow-going, like shoving a square peg into a circular hole, but it was also the most he’d ever had. Until something splintered, he was going to soak in every minute of it. 

Or at least, that was his plan, up until he hit another Bad Day like a semi truck hit thrice-dead roadkill. 

Same thoughts, same pounding (heh) headache. The difference was, now he couldn’t go word-vomit all over the nearest Side until he felt a little less like he was drowning. He was working to keep the delicate peace in his own way, and that meant not bothering the others with his… himself-ness on days like these. 

He couldn’t stay in his room all day, though. For one it was boring, and for two, ever since they’d all agreed to try and cohabitate, Patton and Janus in particular were insistent on checking in if anyone acted strange. Cooping up in his room and not being his usual fantastically sickening and outrageous self would definitely pop up on their radar. If that happened, there was no way he could fool Janus outright. He preferred his own brand of frank honesty anyways, so clearly the only solution was to behave normally enough that nobody looked twice. 

His version of normal, anyhow. 

He groaned loudly and then dragged in a breath, manifesting a pair of slippers that looked uncannily like dead fish onto his feet. He would just have to put his excellent acting skills to use. 

—- 

Remus’s willpower was put to the test as soon as he reached the kitchen. A new record of his ability to destroy plans, this must be why Janus never told him anything. 

Patton was spinning himself in circles on one of the round stools by the bar counter, humming a cartoon theme brightly to himself. At the stovetop, Virgil was sedately flipping pancakes, an easy set to his shoulders that meant he had probably recently taken a long-overdue nap in Logan’s room.

Normally, Remus would already be halfway into teasing the hell out of him, but now his brain felt scrambled with panic. Virgil was particularly susceptible to getting dragged into the cycle of intrusive thoughts on days like these, which meant the anxious Side was the last one he wanted to run into at the moment. 

Two birds with one brick, his stupid hell brain suggested slyly. Send Virgil into a spiral and then it’ll be him who gets nagged, his fault for ruining the friendly atmosphere. 

Stop it. Remus’s face twitched into a self-directed snarl for a moment, and he forced the thought away as Patton finally slowed his rotation to smile dizzily at him. 

“Remus! Good morning!” 

Virgil glanced over his shoulder, sending Remus’s heart rate briefly into the triple digits. Be normal be normal be normal. “Hey, Re. Morning.”

He didn’t even notice. So much for being your friend. If you’re subtle enough, you could sidle up behind him and smash his face into the hot burner—

“WHAT’S UP, FUCKERS!” Remus shouted, teeth spread in a too-wide grin. He bounced into the kitchen, depositing an assorted handful of teeth (his preferred currency) into the swear jar before Patton could say anything, and planted himself on the middle bar stool. 

Patton scooted one stool closer to be next to him, because of course he did. Remus resisted the urge to start prying out handfuls of hair, his own or— no. Toned down, he was keeping it toned down. Buttcheek on a stick, this was difficult.

“Want to spin with me?” Patton asked, shifting antsily from side to side with barely contained energy. 

“Whoever pukes first wins?” Remus replied automatically, and felt a bright burst of giddy joy when Patton giggle-snorted instead of recoiling. 

“I think upchuck is actually supposed to mean you lose your lunch and the spinning contest, kiddo.” 

Of course it did. You were designed to be the loser, even if you try to change the rules. 

Remus knew that this time Patton had spotted the way his lips twitched down into a grimace, but before the fatherly side could say anything, there was the clink of ceramic plates on the counter in front of them. 

“No spinning and/or vomiting if you want to eat my pancakes,�� Virgil demanded, wielding a spatula threateningly at them as he clicked the stovetop off. “We’ll never hear the end of it from Princey if he has to reconjure all the furniture.” 

Irrational, heated anger burned through him. Like Virgil could do anything to stop you. Social interaction was enough to give the guy a panic attack, he couldn’t tell Remus to do or not do anything— 

“You good, Re?” Virgil asked, and he jerked, avoiding the other Side’s gaze as though eye contact would expose his thoughts. After a beat too long, his mind finally caught up with the plate in front of him. 

His pancake was covered in a truly disgusting amount of cheese and ketchup, the way he always requested it back when they’d all been Dark Sides. Despite the fact that he always made a face back then, Virgil had made a point to remember, had done it without asking. 

Like ravenous wolves, his thoughts instantly turned against him. 

Pathetic. How could you think things like that about people who trust you? You shouldn’t even be here, pretending to be a person. You deserve everything coming to you. 

His hand made it halfway to the fork sitting innocently next to his plate before he remembered himself. Virgil was still looking at him, clearly having caught the motion, and Remus lowered his hand, white-knuckled. 

“Me, good? That’s a funny one, V-mo!” he tried to joke, but the odd edge to his voice made it fall flat. Virgil was outright frowning now, and out of the corner of his vision Patton’s eyebrows were drawing together.

“What’s wrong?” Virgil asked, his frame tight with tension and his gaze drilling into Remus. “Are you hurt?” 

“I could be!” Remus blurted, trying to keep his tone saucy but ending up with something closer to desperate. “You ever think maybe bashing my skull in would be better than having to deal with its contents?”

The two of them winced, and he knew he’d given himself away completely. Shit.

Virgil reached out, and then stopped himself before he could make contact. Can you blame him? Jumping into an electrified tank of leeches would be more comfortable than willingly exposing himself to you. 

Something of his internal diatribe must have shown on Remus’s face, because Virgil’s hesitant expression flickered into regret.

“Shit,” he swore, and this time Patton didn’t chide him. “I can’t-- I don’t want to send you into a spiral, Re. If I touch you, we’re just going to be stuck in a feedback loop of bad thoughts.” 

“Like how you’re perpetually stuck in 2009?” Remus offered, instead of listing all the ways he could feasibly remove Virgil’s eyes from their sockets. It would almost be fun, if it wasn’t his friend’s eyes he was contemplating prying out with a spoon handle. 

Virgil’s lips pulled up slightly. “Yeah, just like that. I’m gonna go get the others. They’ll be able to help you for real.” 

He sunk out, and Remus’s head started to ache more severely as terrible and often gory predictions for the future began to crowd his mind. He shoved his hands into the roots of his hair and tugged ferociously. 

“Hey, buddy, you shouldn’t pull on your hair like that,” a concerned voice chimed in. Remus had almost forgotten Patton was still there, sitting only a seat away. 

He pulled harder on his hair, both out of spite and to distract himself from the urge to summon a weapon and see if Patton would still look at you with so much pity if you shanked his ass and tied his intestines into little bows. 

“Hey, what do you call a seasick croc?” Patton asked, abruptly enough that Remus managed to shake his train of thought. He glanced up to look at the Heart, who offered him a tremulous mischievous smile. “A crocobile.” 

Remus snorted, and Patton’s smile seemed to firm up. 

“How about, why do ducks have tail feathers?” the moral Side asked in that same leading tone. 

Remus thought for a minute. “‘Cause otherwise they’d lose their balance in flight and go splat against the nearest window?” 

“I mean, maybe, but also!” Patton held up a finger for emphasis. “They have tail feathers to cover their… butt-quacks.”

There was a beat of anticipation where they both stared at each other, and then Remus threw his head back and outright cackled. Patton fist pumped in delight. 

“I thought you might like that one, kiddo,” he said, beaming. Before Remus could reply, possibly with an atrocious pun of his own, Roman strode into the room. 

There was a brief, awkward pause as the two of them made eye contact. Patton looked rapidly between them with concern, and Remus couldn’t blame him. Even now, their one-on-one interactions tended to end with vicious spats. They were too good, too practiced at pressing each other's buttons to settle into the newfound peace easily. 

“... Bad one?” he finally asked, as though he could spot the wrong-evil-awful all over Remus from a mile away. Remus felt his expression drop into an irritable glower worthy of Anxiety, but before he could retort, Roman was seating himself primly on the communal couch.   

He ran his hand through the hair at the nape of his neck in a nervous habit Remus constantly teased him about, and then straightened his shoulders and patted the cushion next to him. “I’ll… like when we were kids. If you want.” 

Despite Patton’s confused head tilt, Remus got it immediately, and ignored the screaming violence in his head in favor of bodily throwing himself over the couch, jostling the hell out of his brother and eliciting a Grade-A Bitchface from him in the process. Remus grinned maliciously in return.

“Do the one that looks like a snake,” he demanded, running a hand through his hair and lengthening it. Of course, in addition, thick clumps of hair ended up falling out entirely, leaving weird-feeling bald patches that might have been interesting if he’d actually intended to create them. 

“On purpose or don’t want it?” Roman asked, echoing a familiar question from their childhood. It had been a royal decree, before they grew so divided, that one had to ask before ‘fixing’ anything the other did, just in case it was on purpose. 

“How are you supposed to braid what isn’t there?” Remus grumbled, gnawing on the inside of his cheek as he unwillingly imagined restapling his hair to his skull. “Don’t want it.” 

Roman dragged his fingers through Remus’s hair, lengthening it until it was long enough to do all sorts of stupid-complicated braids. He also made the new hair unforgivably glossy and apple-scented, but Remus could get him back for that later, when he was sure it wouldn’t be (nails through nasal cavities, a cloud of suffocating darkness, decaying hands pulling you down into freshly turned soil and burying you alive) disproportionate retribution. 

Two braids later, Logan appeared, rising up in the mindscape with his tie perfectly aligned but lab goggle imprints around his eyes. He only took a moment to absorb the scene, as though it was normal that everyone was crowding around Remus attentively. “Virgil informed me that you could use some assistance?” 

Remus snorted. “Maybe you can perform some impromptu brain surgery to stop me thinking? Hey, if you don’t use anesthetic, I promise not to squirm too much, doc.”

“I don’t believe that man’s ever been to medical school,” Roman quoted absently, still caught up in combining three braids together into one. 

Logan rolled his eyes. “Regardless of my unfortunately lacking PhD status, I believe brain surgery to ‘stop one thinking’ is also colloquially referred to as an induced coma.” 

“Perfect!” Remus cheered, and then yelped when Roman tugged on his hair harshly in retribution. Patton was making that half-pitiful, half-furious face that he always made whenever the emo talked bad about himself, strangely enough.

“There are plenty of adjectives I could use to describe such a solution, but none of them would be ‘perfect’, Remus,” Logan continued. “A more effective and patient-friendly answer would be addressing your irritating or harmful thoughts through the use of various mental health tactics.” 

Easy for him to say. “That might work for Tommy-boy, but I am the harmful or irritating thoughts, remember?” 

“Falsehood.” Logan declared, proving that no matter what aspect of Thomas they were, the Sides were all dramatic theater kid bastards at heart. “It has become increasingly clear that while we all formed to handle certain tasks or aspects, we are all increasingly complex at heart. None of us can be diminished to simply one trait. In the same way that Virgil is much more than the experience of anxiety, there is no logical reason to reduce yourself to the thoughts that you struggle with.” 

Remus shook his head, though he wasn’t sure what part of the assertion he was resisting. Logan folded himself into a sitting position and reached over for Remus’s hand, his touch grounding. 

“You’ve gotten through days like this before. You’ll continue to do so after,” Logan told him. 

“I got through Bad Days by making everyone’s day bad,” Remus retorted. “I’m not you, but I’m not stupid. Nobody wants me making it into a communal event.” 

“That’s what family’s for though,” Patton said, shifting closer from his own spot on the rug. “Listening. Helping. Having each other’s backs when things get tough!” 

Logan’s grip didn’t falter. Roman’s presence was solid at his back. Remus was beginning to wonder if he’d snorted something hallucinogenic recently.

“The sentiment is admirable, if a bit hypocritical,” a familiar voice chimed in, and Remus looked up to see Janus leaning elegantly against the kitchen archway. Virgil elbowed his way past, ruining the dramatic pose and flopping down on the couch next to Remus. He bumped his shoe against Remus’s leg in quiet camaraderie.

“Hypocritical?” Logan echoed, raising an eyebrow. 

“Unless you’d like to tell me that everyone here has no problems whatsoever asking for help or expressing vulnerability on their bad days,” Janus proposed, smugly. 

Logan inclined his head slightly. “Point.” 

“Regardless, that doesn’t make Logic or Morality incorrect.” Janus looked at Remus intently. “None of us are allowed to simply suffer in silence, anymore.”

“I didn’t exactly suffer in silence before,” he pointed out, sounding uncannily sensible. Probably from the nerd’s proximity. 

“Then you shouldn’t have a problem now, hmm?” Janus replied. 

Logan sighed at them all, collectively, in general. “Look at it from this angle, Remus. Your previous coping mechanism was generally detrimental due to your lack of options and isolation. Now, you have neither of those holding you back. With knowledge and assistance, you can only improve from here on out.” 

Now, that was doubtful. “And what if I don’t, huh? What if I just get worse?” 

“Then we’ll still be here.” Logan squeezed his hand, and Janus confirmed his words with a nod, and even though his mind was cluttered and overwhelming, they were all still there at his side without complaint. 

Maybe it wasn’t too much to ask, after all.

“Well, what are we trying first?”