#may or may not make sense but thats ok

[martyrbat]

sorry but im still just thinking about how batman 105 (aka the comic where bruce gets his tits out and asks khoa to stay) begins with them having a sloppy breakup in the rain and khoa offering bruce to travel and save the world together, they'll live lavishly and gather resources. and then MAYBE they can tackle gotham together. hes trying to convince bruce to stay and that hes going to get himself killed because of his stupid bleeding heart and how he blames himself for every loss. that together they can conquer so much more. and bruce responds by calling him broken and telling him he's angry that bruce is always going to care about the people he saves. he's still determined to go, still choosing gotham over his best (and only) friend.

but he tells him this as theyre in the rain and khoa is still trying to convince bruce to change his mind despite the plane being there and knowing that bruce wont. bruce is one of the only people thats seen his face and knows his name, the only person that truly knows him—yet all those years they spent together still isn't as important as that vow bruce took as a mourning 8 year old boy. so he demands for bruce to never say his name again—he doesn't get that right or the one to see his face ever again. and bruce still doesnt change his mind, leaving khoa behind without so much as a glance behind him.

while batman annual 2021 is khoa bragging about his greatest feat—taking down madame midas, the woman who laughed as his mother was killed and as her father strong-armed his father's independent business. he doesn't tell bruce this but it still ends with bruce pointing out there has to be a reason he cared and spent so long on it. khoa denies it, of course, repeating back what he tells himself constantly. he doesnt care about anything (and, by extension, about anyone). but the comic literally just showed us, the reader, between those two pages that this isnt true! he had a personal motive, he recired back the words she told him all those years again! but after khoa says he doesnt care about anything is the first time on panel that bruce calls him khoa again (as far as i remember :p)

but then khoa is suddenly changing the topic!! not allowing bruce to continue, not even acknowledging the name or all the years it nust have been between the last time someone called him that—the last time BRUCE called him that. and its only after the accusation of khoa caring like how he does—of khoa not being ‘broken’ like how he said the last time he attempted to use that name!! AND that this is their last chronical interaction (on panel) before khoa is the one leaving bruce behind to train bao...

im sure bruce used it off panel before this (and it was probably during sloppy old man sex) but this being it on paper has been making me go >:3c!!!!

[skenpiel]

i think if you say let people enjoy things you should also be saying Let people not enjoy things. let people enjoy things is of course a slogan used primarily to try and urge people to not harass or bully others for their harmless interests. but sometimes i see someone hate on something trivial and someone responds by saying let people enjoy things And generally speaking i think if someone else disliking someone is enough to make you feel like youre being bullied personally maybe youre not enjoying it all that much. i guess all in all youre allowed to like harmless things but people are also allowed to hate harmless things for no reason. sometimes you just dont like something and i dont think you should let that stop you from doing things you like

[mildcicada]

[camzverse]

Nooo cam u dont want to analyze the psychology behind mikes actions in the bite of 83 even though scott didnt put anywhere near your amount of thought into it noo dont do that. freak

[rinbylin]

I already adore fdb/princess zhaoling since the first watch but I've only gotten around to thinking about them a lot more lately. for reasons.

they have unmatched compatibility because they're essentially very similar people, you know, in a world surrounded by everyone else more experienced and different from them. two sheltered and privileged, initially naive kids who yearn / enjoy freedom and dares to seek out for it. (though zhaoling pursues after that lifestyle less actively than fdb.) and they are both very loved and protected by the adult figures they met outside of the mainstream system they were born into. as a sign of defiance, zhaoling submits the chicken feet, which fdb chose over any other conventional option -- was their moment of connection to each other, even unbeknownst to themselves.

it struck me that in their first interactions with each other, zhaoling as qing'er was seen frequently serving fdb - practically emulating traditional husband and wife roles. in the same patriarchal microcosm of girls mansion, fdb played the husbandly role with a duty to protect his wife - in fact he was the only person who had the power to do so while she wasn't allowed to fend for herself. this power dynamics switches over completely when zhaoling was revealed to be the princess, fdb becomes totally reserved around her and puts himself beneath her while she, the only person with the power to save everyone else.

however, in between those two points in their relationship, zhaoling was able to reveal her true personality while he acted comfortably with her. in their private moments at girls mansion, she commanded fdb around - he heeds obediently but still felt comfortable enough to voice his opinions to zhaoling. she was possibly the only person who could match up to fdb's 本少爷 young master attitude, while also being the one who can fully admire his qualities without any other considerations. they were able to play off each other freely - and this is most likely how the both of them would have interacted with each other as individuals without any inhibitions of the social roles/identities they were tied to. at their most comfortable with each other.

(the twist in) their ending in the show is hopeful but their fate is as unknown as the ending of anybody else in this show. just as what fdb said to princess, "who is to know now what will happen in the future?"

I love that zhaoling respected his will and that we were given an open reading. but at the same time, any thought of their possible fate beyond this point can't help but be coloured in tragic tones more than not:

over the course of the story after the girl's mansion arc, their dynamics gradually levels again, but I am not sure if it ever managed to revert to the aforementioned ideal state of their private moments together in girl's mansion.

the wait is indefinite. what would be "enough" for fdb? can you really get enough of jianghu? how long is it going to be?

if they wanted to be with each other at all, there is still sort of an expectation that he was to come back to her (not her to him) - the problem not being her as a person, but that being with her came with being married to the imperial court. to marry the princess means they do not simply become husband and wife, but will also become ruler-subject. and the latter would be the greatest tragedy to happen to their relationship as two equals who are able to connect to each other in their understanding of the world.

their true fate together largely depends on who fdb would become after llh is gone. if their ending pointed to something hopeful but uncertain after their last scene together, now in llh's absence, it's even more of a mystery. regardless, what stands between them is jianghu and time - and what is the jianghu fdb is going after now? after fdb went through the redefinition of jianghu once (losing lxy - between finding out llh was lxy, and cutting ties from bcy for the sake of llh) and then once again (losing llh in the ending)?

there is simply no way of knowing for sure for the audience. in the same way, there will no known answer to what happens to fdb and zhaoling. anything is possible. here's another take:

given the person fdb is, it is hard to imagine fdb making empty promises to zhaoling if he felt nothing for her - or despite knowing it will entail with him entering the imperial court aka the last thing he wanted in the world.

I'm inclined to think, even if he fulfills his promise to princess, it will be because fdb has broken the cycle of grief and learnt to deal with it. rather than as a reluctant compromise.

he was supposed to be most like his shifu lxy/llh, according to lxy/llh himself. llh has lived that life of becoming liberated in his own terms. if fdb had truly inherited the life lessons llh was imparting to him (not the martial abilities and techniques), then fdb would be capable of going on to liberate himself and become the person most like his shifu. and he will be a contrast to dfs being the one trapped in grief. (thus also making dfs's place in fdb's potential post-canon life so significant and compelling.) he symbolises the future, the hope of the new generation who has been guided and nurtured by the love of his predecessors.

of course notwithstanding that there is a more sinister reality to the imperial court realm, I would still like to explore a more positive possibility. even though agreeing to the imperial engagement appears to be a submission to the system he was initially intent on rebelling against, I would like to think that growth in fdb would look like acceptance and making life in his own terms within the given parameters - like what llh had made for himself in the first year of becoming llh. it's no longer about taking extreme measures (constantly running away) but an act of balancing and harmonisation. (-> my hypothesis that if lxy is yin, dfs is yang then fdb would be yin-yang)

marrying zhaoling would be for who she is rather than the system she stood for. or if there could be another way, like her leaving to be with him - I'm not sure. but what I know is. in a post-llh world, the people he loves (eg. zhaoling, papa and mama fang) live in the realm of secular, mainstream society (while also not quite - but they're definitely not part of wulin jianghu either). after all, jianghu will cease to be jianghu if the people he loves are no longer in it.

[hive-buzzes]

how come some of the cats are vampires?

Great question! Genetic mutation! One day it started randomly appearing in cats, they passed it on and now theres a population. (It can also randomly pop up again and there arent cat dhampirs, the latter is especially something i wanted to say)

Or if you mean "why are there mortal cats in the hive colony" survival reasons! More cats to help out (tho i think mostly Elmseed was an orphan that they pitied and took with them when they left to make the colony)

[voltrixz]

IM BACK IN THE FUCKIN BUILDING AGAIN (decided to take a quick break from oc refs to do rough sketches for some electroshocker doodles and argh. (now they're spinnning around in my brain at rapid speeds. AAHRHHH AHRH GRHHRH AGHRHRH GET THESE 2 OUT OF HERE!!!!)

[ryuseitai]

i was trying to figure out what date the trip album ids go by, and i think i did it hink it just counts all of the season that stella maris took place in But it was frustrating me at first bc. it has shinobu and tetora as 17 and midori as 16 and chiaki and kanata as 18 So itd be before chiaki kanata midori bday but after shinobu tetora so like, late june through late august But i was like wtf bc i felt like i rmbred stella maris being in earlier spring WELL ACTUALLY NO IM CONFUSED AGAIN BC STELLA MARIS Is spring of second year of es. so shouldnt they all be 1yr older than that Or am i stupid Or is it not going by date of stella maris.

[tategaminu]

Callum is so handsome I hope they reveal his father as the hottest man ever

[redysetdare]

I fucking hate the "let people do whatever they want! It's just a fictional character!" argument in fandom spaces so fucking much. That argument isn't just used by aphobes it's also used by racists and ableists all the time and it's just exhausting to be in fandom spaces nowadays. No matter how much we tell them that fiction does in fact affect our reality these people simply aren't willing to listen. Just because you personally aren't affected doesn't suddenly mean that fiction doesn't have any effect on reality for anyone!! I hate how much people weaponise anti-censorship arguments against minorities. They just want to push us out of their communities by any means necessary. That's it. They don't want us in spaces that they consider as theirs.

The thing about the "let people do whatever they want" argument is that no individual has the ability to stop and censor another. no one is forcing anyone to stop, it's actually impossible to do so and they know that - what they're actually arguing is that "no one should judge me for what i do" "No one should voice disapproval or complain about what I'm doing" "I should be able to do what i want without social consequences." "people should always be tolerant of what I'm doing"

It's never been about "Letting people do what they want" but rather "you shouldn't be allowed to dislike me for what I do." they don't think they should be judged for their bigoted views that are thinly veiled behind "it's just fiction!". They don't want to be questioned about their underlying biases because they've built themselves up on being good and an ally - but it's all a performance. an appearance. they're more afraid of appearing racist or phobic rather than actually not being racist or phobic. They play the part of a good ally until they need to actually deconstruct their world view and how they interact with the world. then it's too much work and actually we're being unreasonable and getting upset over nothing. you see this a lot when they try to use loopholes to still seem progressive while also supporting their bigoted ideas.

In the end, anyone can do whatever they want; but that means anyone can judge you too. anyone can decide they don't like you for whatever reason. people can criticize you and form opinions around your actions. While the characters are fake, how you treat them is real. If you show no respect for fake minorities then how can anyone trust you to show respect for real ones?

[komashkathesilly]

hum hm hi i wanna do a silly talk. that question or just a point that pops up when ppl sometimes discuss tsukasas sekai is how full and especially full of individual personalities it is besides voaloids which seems wild compared to other sekais created from more like. collective feelings than of one person. but um i feel like its kinda self explanatory cause its pretty clear hes got rlly bright imagination and rlly loves shows for which he makes up script in most of cases with wxs but thats also what he used to do when he was younger for and with saki and toya(tho i dont rlly remember where exactly its mentioned and some details abt it sorry i might be wrong somewhere bc of it idk) in which characters seemed to have also had distinct personalities throughout each show but also for most plushies in general and other toys probably which may mean he got to feel kinda close enough to them for them to even materialise as part of his feelings in his sekai and continue living and helping him on their own? in a they probably even at that point were like his imaginary friends that were alive to him kinda way?

and seems like since at that period of time he spent lots of time on his own thats probably what he used to do mostly? and thinking and imagining the plots the dialogues personalities environment like all that and then playing it might be so much more entertaining than the reality especially if a lot of time u spend alone? so much that it can kinda lead to disassociating? or at least just getting a bit too into it that u forget or stop noticing or ignore the day to day life idk idk. like that kinda thing can at least a bit damage ur memory is what i mean even if the overall experience and situation ur in is not that bad u can be just at least bored and/or stressed enough for that to happen

[britneyshakespeare]

last night i started rereading david copperfield. i've read so much new literature this year, i wouldn't say im "burnt out" but i feel like im cycling through things so fast that i... i dont know. i dont feel like i get to have them melt into me as satisfyingly as they used to although that might also be a product of how i feel about my overall *life* right now, idk. deep stuff but anyway.

i havent read a novel in almost four years. i have been too ashamed to pick them back up and i left off in the middle of the professor by charlotte bronte, which i always felt ashamed for being unable to finish. someday ill reread the beginning and finish it, but yadda yadda yadda i hate that nagging feeling that i HAVE to do something. reading should not feel like a chore. which is also how ive felt about my reading plays at such a quick rate this year. not that its a CHORE, like im not enjoying it, but like it's a daily task im distracting myself with to get some temporary pleasure and im cycling from one to the next at an almost monotonous rate. i can't keep living in my imagination like this. hiding from the world and pouring myself into new ones.

i always figured id want to reread david copperfield someday, too. it's one of my three favorite novels ive ever read (not that ive read SO many novels, but still). i think of it often. and i dont think of it like it's a highly literary or intellectual novel. i think of it like an old sitcom or a newspaper strip. like a victorian peanuts or full house. i've never forgotten a bunch of the characters' catchphrases and i've continued to slip them into conversation with people who don't understand them just to overly-explain a joke that only i'm really going to find funny. because that IS the kind of person i am.

ive only read the first four chapters so far. i just cant wait to get to aunt betsey's place, to be honest. i didn't even think about this part... this is the first novel i'm reading since i became an aunt. i never had a character in the book i related to *too* much; i had certain things in common with dora and i loved her, but we weren't one and the same. but my niece is only two and a half months old and i already feel like oh yeah. oh yeah i'd take this little girl in after she ran away from her abusive boarding school. i'd provide for this girl. i'd raise her with my neurodivergent friend that i live with. i would do ANYTHING for her.

[nomaishuttle]

anyways. sorry. got cranky

[fictionallyinparadise]

Not to be gay on main but...........f/o body hair goobd

[grenriv]

I wish I didn't feel so violently alienated from my own religion sometimes. like I really do believe in what I believe in and I want to have a better and deeper relationship with God and I would like to build relationships with other christians and then whenever I hear other people talking about doctrine/scripture/God it just feels. so cold to me. or even just the way they act in general. it's very hard to explain but it always sounds like they're reading from a script instead of voicing genuine thoughts and feelings and it makes me feel like there's a barrier between me and them or I'm doing something horribly wrong, even if at the root of it I do agree with what's being said

[dirtytransmasc]

ok ok ok, I was doing random world building for a brain au (as in this is all you will ever hear of it, I'm keeping this one for myself, sorry) cause I'm maladaptive and bored. anyway, I had to work out who was with who and succession and everything, cause I was committed to the bit, and a crack ship has arisen:

Daeron and Rhaena... thoughts, feelings, opinions?

I think they'd be a cute betrothal, while purely political at first, I think they could actually get along quite well. they're closer in age (2 years apart in the books, though that might change in the show, who knows who cares, this is not going all that deep), Daeron's an energetic sweetheart, Rhaena's quiet but none the less feisty like her mother, both of them can be both sweet and sour, even spicy at times (especially Daeron *cough cough* war flashbacks *cough cough*). I feel like they would have 'friends before lovers' vibes, but they would love each other dearly in time.

I just think they could be cute, if fate willed a situation where they would be betrothed, cause otherwise there would be little to no chance. especially cause in my head (and storyline) they would be the ones taking Driftmark on Rhaena's claim, making Daeron her adoring lord consort (cause they deserved to have their true claims honored)

Edit: I looked into this and found crumbs of content, I am beyond pleased.