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panda-noosh · 6 years ago

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Less than Lovers, More than Friends {Matt Holt x Reader}

Words: 8k

Summary: Matt's girlfriend is toxic, and he doesn't realise it.

Genre: angst

Warning: domestic abuse – manipulation

Notes: masterlist – i’m back folks yeehaw

---

Your shoulders jerked as another crash sounded from the room opposite you, followed abruptly by Matt and Caitlin's yelling.

It was nothing new. You heard them fighting all the time, heard Caitlin losing her temper to the point where she picked up the closest object to her and volleyed it across the room at Matt. But just because you heard it often, didn't mean you enjoyed it, didn't make it any easier to sleep through.

You clenched your eyes shut tight and rolled over, dragging the pillow over your head in any attempt to block out the god awful arguing; it would go on for hours. Caitlin would never let the subject drop, not until Matt was all but claiming she had been right the entire time. Sometimes Matt let the argument go on and on, refusing to belittle his own intelligence for someone as stubborn as Caitlin – but eventually she would lose her temper, and things got broken and Matt got hurt.

Sometimes you wondered why he was still with her.

In fact, you always wondered why he was still with her, when he could have any person in the world. He was smart, kind, good looking – he was a gift. Someone you knew you weren't worthy to call your own, but someone you wished you could.

And yet there he was, in the hallway across from you with his wild girlfriend throwing foreign objects at him. He could be doing something with his life, have a love that he deserved, but he stayed with her.

The door to your room slowly creaked open, and you knew immediately who it was. Glancing over your shoulder, your suspicions were confirmed when Allura slipped into the darkness and stood hesitantly in your doorway, awkwardly ringing her hands in front of her.

You rolled over fully, having to speak up to be heard over the psychotic screams of Caitlin across the hall. “Why are you up so late?”

“Why do you think?” Allura replied. Now that she had confirmation you were indeed awake, she strolled confidently across your room and flopped down onto the bed next to you, tugging the covers up to her chin. “They've been arguing for hours. I think she hurt Matt again.”

“Should we do something?”

“Yes.” Allura paused. “But you know what Matt's gonna do if we try to intervene again.”

You pursed your lips, remembering the last time any of you had tried to step in front of Caitlin and put a stop to the chaotic fighting. She had gotten out of control again, and Shiro had had enough. He marched into the room, got ready to yell, but then Caitlin was whirling on him and throwing an ash tray in his direction. Matt had been forced to grab her, causing himself even more harm.

He hadn't spoken to Shiro for days after that.

You sighed and buried your head in the pillows once again. “What do you think they're arguing about this time?”

“I wouldn't call it arguing as much as it's Caitlin screaming her head off,” replied Allura. “But I think it's about Matt's mission tomorrow.”

You perked up. “The one him and I are going on?”

“Mm.” Allura picked at her nails, her arms stretched high above her face. “Miss Caitlin doesn't like it when you and Matt have alone time together.”

You paused, head snapping round to evaluate the expression on Allura's face, because surely she was kidding. Despite there being absolutely no hint of humour in her voice, you couldn't bring yourself to believe that she would even suggest such a bizarre thing.

You prided yourself on how well you hid your feelings for Matt Holt. There was no way someone like Caitlin was able to see through the wall you had built for the past five years of knowing the man.

“What are you talking about?” you asked when Allura showed no sign of elaborating on her bizarre claims.

She looked over at you and shrugged, as if her words were no big deal. “I don't exactly blame her. You've known Matt longer than she has, and she doesn't like that you two have that bond. Plus, Matt is always ten times happier when he's around you – anyone on the ship is able to see that.”

Your mouth grew dry, head running at a million miles per hour. Was Caitlin currently hurling insults, hurling objects at Matt because of what she thought of you?

You clenched your fists tight in the covers. Allura jerked, the covers bunching up around her chin with the grip you currently had in them.

“Y/N?” Allura inquired, slowly leaning over to get a better look at your expression in the darkness. You quickly unclenched your jaw, relaxed your fists, started nonchalantly smoothing a crease out in the blankets.

“He promised us he can deal with her,” you said. “I'll check up on him once she's calmed down.”

Allura nodded, though she kept a suspicious eye on you even as she relaxed back into the pillows. Neither of you spoke after that – it was too difficult trying to have a civil, simple conversation when you could hear Caitlin's animalistic shrieking thumping through the walls in the next room. It played as background music to the sound of your own worried thoughts, images of Matt trying desperately to calm Caitlin down.

Allura's breathing slowly eased until it was nothing more than a gentle trickle, indicating she had finally fallen asleep. You wanted to follow her lead, needed to follow her lead considering you had an important mission to go on the next morning – but you couldn't. You couldn't even close your eyes without thinking of Matt, without thinking of the guilt that was currently erupting in your system because you weren't doing anything.

You pressed the balls of your palm into your eye, tried to fight off the urge to scream before rolling over and burying your head in the pillows, the only thing you could think to do to waste time before morning came.

+++ How he always managed to pretend that nothing had happened was completely beyond you.

How she could pretend that nothing had happened was completely beyond you.

Caitlin and Matt walked into the kitchen side-by-side, as per usual, the next morning. You had been sat downstairs since before the sun had even risen, your lack of sleep dragging you from the warmth of the comforters so you could start breakfast for everyone else. Shiro and Keith – forever the early birds – had already indulged in a plate of scrambled eggs each, both very confused as to why you were up so early, but neither asking for answers.

Now it was Matt and Caitlin's turn, and to say you were dreading their appearance was an understatement.

As usual, Matt gave you that award winning grin before he settled himself down at the counter. Caitlin gently stroked her fingertips over his shoulder blades as she walked past him towards the fridge, a way of silently telling you that he was hers. She didn't even look in your direction, but the message was clear from the smug smile on her face as she let her fingers scrape along his flesh, forcing him to look up and give her a small, acknowledged nod.

You clenched your fists, biting your lower lip before you looked over at Matt and smiled. “Sleep well?”

“Do we have any milk left from our last grocery run?”

Your teeth clamped impossibly harder upon your bottom lip, Caitlin's shrill voice making your toes curl.

Nonetheless, you turned and glanced at her. “We should do. Unless Hunk was doing his usual late night-”

“Oh, here's some!” she yipped, popping up from the fridge with a full carton of milk in her hand – she had only interrupted your greeting with Matt to stop any type of conversation from forming.

You turned back and shook your head slowly. Matt caught the movement – he often did – and pursed his lips, before reaching over and grabbing the bowl of scrambled eggs that you had left out on the counter. “These fresh?”

“Freshly made this morning,” you replied. “You should probably dive in, though. Even Keith had some.”

“Keith?” Matt widened his eyes in exaggerated shock. “Wow. Whoever made these must have some skills in the kitchen.”

You shrugged. “I can't take all the credit. I didn't even know how to crack an egg before Hunk-”

“Matt, scooch over.”

Once again, Caitlin made her appearance. Matt barely had time to register what she had asked of him before she was crashing her shoulder against his and slipping onto the stool next to him. She slapped her bowl of cereal down onto the counter, took one glance at the eggs and scowled.

“They look like they've been sat out for hours.”

You raised a brow. “I only made them this morning.”

“Mm,” she hummed dismissively before turning to Matt. “I think you should just have cereal. Don't wanna risk getting sick before a mission, do you?”

Matt pursed his lips. Your heart thundered, anger pouring into your veins at a million miles per hour. You were going to lose it. You were really going to lose it, because her attitude this morning and the memories of the vile things she had been screaming the previous night were flashing through your mind, driving you forward, making you-

“No. I feel like having scrambled eggs this morning.”

Your eyes snapped up, widening just a fraction. “Matt, you don't have to-” But he was already reaching for the bowl, even as his girlfriends eyes shot daggers into the side of his head, even as Caitlin all but trembled with fury at being disobeyed by the one person she believed she had wrapped around her finger.

You kept your eyes on her, prepared for anything. It was a protective streak, a dull thump in the back of your head. Your fingers uncurled from the fist you had them bunched up in, ready to reach over the table and grab her ponytail if she even so much as tried to lay a hostile finger on Matt.

But even though she was an evil bitch, she had common sense. She flicked her eyes over to you, took a deep breath and quickly dove back into her cereal, now turning her head away from Matt as a sign of defiance.

Matt scooped some scrambled eggs onto his plate and started eating, eyes shining with the first bite. “Ooh. Hunk taught you well!”

You kept an eye on Caitlin, even as you accepted the compliment, even as you and Matt were finally able to get into a proper, intelligent conversation that didn't involve her stupid, petty questions cutting in every few seconds.

It was nice, despite the air of tension that was surrounding you all. Allura's words from the previous night echoed in your head; Caitlin wasn't bristling because of Matt. She was bristling because of you, because of your presence, because Matt truly could speak to you with little to no hesitation.

A part of you thought it might be better if you just got up and left. Caitlin would calm down, and Matt would be able to have a peaceful breakfast – but you were only guessing with that one. You could get up and leave and open the flood gates for him by leaving him alone with her. She could turn on him, her temper flaring, and then what would happen? God only knew, but judging by the argument they had been having last night, the aftermath could be nothing good.

And so you stayed, talking to Matt both because you wanted to hear his voice, and because you wanted to keep him safe.

+++

You buckled your seat belt and shot Allura one final farewell glance before the ship was taking off and you and Matt were alone.

You couldn't remember the last time you had been alone with him. The two of you were friends – best friends – but there was a barrier that had been placed between you in the past six months that he had been with Caitlin.

Neither of you spoke about it, though the tension within the silence was clue enough that he could feel it just as heavily as you could. He was sat in the drivers seat, hands gripping the wheel, glancing up at you through the rear view mirror every few seconds. You could only spare him an awkward smile before you turned back to the GPS you had been put in charge of.

Things were just different. Not in a bad way. Just being able to see him every day and still call him your friend was good enough for you, but things were different in the sense that Matt was no longer the young fifteen year old boy you had met all them years ago. He was someone different now – smarter in the sense of his intelligence and his experience, but stupid in the sense that he had let himself get trapped in such an awful situation, and was currently refusing any of the help he was being offered.

The ship juddered. Matt changed gear quickly, glanced at you to make sure you were okay, and it was then that you decided to speak up.

“You didn't have to do that at breakfast, you know.”

Matt looked away. “I didn't do anything at breakfast.”

“You did. You can't deny it.”

“I ate breakfast.”

“You went against Caitlin's orders.”

Matt's knuckles whitened on the steering wheel. Part of your brain was screaming at you to back off, to let the subject drop before he got angry at you and this entire mission became one big, awkward mess.

But you didn't back off.

“You say that like she owns me,” Matt grunted finally. “I'm a twenty year old man. I can do what I want without her permission.”

“That's not what the rest of us have been seeing these past few months.”

“Good thing the rest of you aren't in my relationship and don't know jack shit about what goes on behind closed doors.”

You scoffed. “I think those of us that hear her throwing stuff at you every night are pretty familiar with what goes on behind closed doors.”

He snapped, slapping his palm against the steering wheel. The ship stirred, but Matt quickly got it back under control, ignoring your startled cry. “Why are you even talking to me about her? You two don't even speak to each other!”

“And by the looks of things, you two don't speak to each other either!” you exclaimed. “She just yells at you and tells you what to do, and you sit back and pretend like it's okay!”

“I can do what I want. Just because I try to listen to my girlfriend sometimes-”

“Oh, Matt, give me a break,” you scoffed, slumping down in your seat, running your hands through your hair. “You're smarter than this. You're so much smarter than this – you know full well you aren't just listening to your girlfriend.”

Matt bristled. “You have no idea what you're talking about.”

You clenched your jaw. Why was he being like this? Why was he being so clueless? There was no part of you that believed he truly did not understand, that he truly just thought he was being a caring boyfriend by doing everything his girlfriend told him to do. He was smarter than that.

He just didn't want to admit it.

You turned back to the GPS, pressing your elbows into the table and leaning your head in your palms. He wasn't going to listen to you – that much was obvious.

+++

The thing about Matt was that his job was his life.

He did everything for the sake of the world. He stayed up until early hours of the morning trying to figure out a single line of coding that would jump start whatever piece of machinery he was having trouble with. He would risk his own life for the sake of the people he loved, and he let nothing get in the way of getting his job done.

The argument the two of you had gotten into was forgotten almost as soon as his boots touched the ground. He had been silent for the remaining hour of the journey, but as soon as the two of you had landed and the mission had officially started, it was almost as if nothing had happened.

“Stay close to me,” he demanded, grabbing your arm and pulling you into his side. “First step – find the entrance to the factory, find the systems room and get the information.”

“Easier said than done,” you muttered, but you followed his every step nonetheless. You were the back-up in this situation; cover for Matt if things got a little too difficult. Whilst he was a whizz with computers and programming, you had been trained in the art of combat for as long as you could remember. You would be parading around the door, making sure nobody was going to attack Matt as he gathered the information you two had been sent out to retrieve.

The factory in question was not difficult to find by any stretch of the imagination. Guards littered the doorways, the building towering over everything else. You could see the tip of the roof as you and Matt approached through the trees, could smell the smoke billowing from the many chimneys lining the tiled roof.

You could also smell the blood.

You shot Matt a startled glance; you knew what this place did, the amount of bodies that had been discovered and hidden by the Galra. You knew it was terrible, but the proof of it in the air was startling. Matt clenched his jaw, looked back at you, but neither of you said anything. You both knew what to expect – there was no point in making a big deal over it.

You stepped out of the tree line and started towards the entrance. The suits you were both wearing would be enough to disguise you, help you blend in, but as soon as you started messing with the systems, suspicions would be aroused and the two of you would have to pick up the pace.

“Agent Spears and Agent Givaldi,” Matt said as soon as you were both in front of the guards. They barely even glanced at the badges you were both holding up before the door was being shouldered open and you were granted much-needed access.

You hesitantly stuffed your badge back into your coat pocket, leaned towards Matt and whispered, “That was too easy. Something's not right.”

“Keep an eye out,” he whispered back.

The hallways grew less and less crowded the deeper into the factory you and Matt went. You kept your head low as Matt nodded and interacted with the passing mechanics, scientists, evil geniuses that you came across; he was good at this kind of thing, pretending everything was okay when it wasn't, putting on a fake smile for the sake of others.

You, on the other hand, could do no such thing. You pulled your collar a little bit higher around your jaw, picked up your pace until you and Matt had finally arrived at the systems room.

Matt made to walk right past it. If it hadn't been for your quick reflexes, he would have done so, but you just barely managed to hook your arm through his and drag him through the metal door. You shoved him forward and quickly slammed it closed, pressing your back against it as rough pants rattled your chest.

“Go,” you ordered upon realising that Matt was simply staring at the lines upon lines of computers currently flashing at him. He swallowed thickly, nodded and dashed off to the nearest one. His fingers sped across the keyboard as he put in the details he needed, his tongue slowly making it's way out of his mouth in that way it always did when he was concentrating. His brown eyes narrowed, and he ran a hand through his messy brown hair.

You could have watched him forever when he was in this mindset, because it was one of the rare times he actually seemed at peace. Despite the risk of getting caught, despite the fact that you had just stolen the identity of two people who could very well be marching through these hallways right now, Matt was at peace because he was doing what he loved.

But you couldn't watch him forever. Not now. Not whenever you heard the voices ringing out behind the door.

Matt looked up, eyes frantic. Swiftly, you pulled your gun from the back of your dress trousers and whirled around, waving a dismissive hand in his direction.

“I can handle it.”

“They're early. By the time they get to the door, I won't have gotten in,” he replied. “Y/N, if we need to leave-”

“I can handle it!” you barked. “Get the information. Fast.”

Truth was, you weren't sure if you could handle it. The voices were getting louder and louder with each passing second. They would be passing the door soon, might just decide to look in if you and Matt hadn't been subtle enough – you couldn't risk that. You couldn't afford them getting suspicious and looking inside whenever Matt was elbow deep in their computers mechanics.

The gun trembled in your hands. If they were to open the door, you would never be able to get a direct hit. Your aim would be off, lives would be at risk, the alarms would go off and you-

“Have you got in yet?” you hissed, stumbling away from the door just as the heads of the passing scientists disappeared down the hallway. You nearly doubled over in relief, but used the energy instead to spin around and look at Matt.

He nodded slowly. “I'm in but . . . there's so much to undo. It'll take hours for all of it to transfer onto the memory stick.”

“We don't have hours.”

“I know that,” Matt hissed, running his hands through his hair. “I can only take little bits at a time.” He looked up at you. “We're gonna have to come back another day for the rest.”

You blinked, heart dropping into your stomach. “Matt...”

“I know it's not ideal,” he said, already plugging the memory stick into the side of the computer. “But we have no other choice. If Shiro doesn't like the sudden halt in plans, then he's gonna have to find another way. Right now, this is the only option we have.”

You didn't bother arguing with him; what could you even say? If he was unable to do it, then that was completely out of his control. Besides, the idea of risking another few minutes in this room, behind an unlocked door with Galra soldiers marching outside of it, had you uneasy. The quicker you got out of here – information obtained or not – the happier you would be.

Matt plucked the memory stick out from the computer after a few minutes, stuffed it into his pocket before dashing round the side of the desk and heading towards the door. You took one last hesitant glance back at the room before you followed behind him, making your way back down the hostile hallways.

+++

Never before had you been happier to see Team Voltron.

Lance opened the doors and immediately engulfed you in a welcome home hug. You spluttered against him, but wrapped your arms around his middle and hugged him back nonetheless.

“You both went off the radar,” he said. “We thought we'd lost you!”

“We had to take our jackets off to put on the blazers,” you explained, pulling away and flattening a piece of his hair with a fond smile on your face. “We left the tracking devices in the pockets of our old jackets.”

Lance grunted. “Don't scare me like-”

“Oh my God, there you are!”

You squeezed your eyes closed. Of course.

Caitlin stampeded through the array of people waiting to welcome you and Matt home, bouncing her shoulder roughly against Slav's and causing the poor man to stumble forward, just barely catching himself on Pidge's upper arm. She was wearing one of Matt's old jumpers, along with a pair of stained blue jeans and converse.

She looked casual. She truly looked as if she'd been having a spa day whilst you and Matt had been out risking your lives for the sake of people like her.

You gritted your teeth and forced yourself to look away before you could play victim to the sight of her crashing her lips against Matt's.

“They told me about you going off the radar,” she said. “I was so worried, Matt. I thought I'd lost you.”

“I'm fine,” Matt replied, a slight tremble to his voice that had you glancing over your shoulder to make sure he was okay.

His eyes were wide, cheeks flushed and fingers slack against her waist. It was a direct contrast to the tight grip Caitlin had on his shoulders, caging him in before he had a chance to detach himself from her arms.

“This is exactly the reason why I didn't want you going,” she huffed. “Y/N could have handled the mission perfectly well on their own. You had no reason to go.”

“Y/N isn't a computer programmer,” Pidge scoffed. “Idiot.”

Matt's eyes widened. You snickered, but quickly hid it with a cough as Caitlin whirled around to shoot a glare in your direction. She would never yell at Pidge – not with Matt in the room – meaning the first person she could release her anger on was you.

You gave her a wary grin. “I'm afraid Pidge is right. We needed Matt today.”

Matt placed a hand on Caitlin's arm. “It's okay, Cate. I'm fine. We're both fine.” He glanced up at Shiro then. “We might have to go back another few times to get the rest of the information.”

Shiro started to reply, but of course Caitlin had to get her own comments in first. It started with a shrill squeal of shock before she was spinning on her heel and slamming her hands into Matt's shoulders.

It could have been light hearted. There was every possibility that she didn't mean to hurt him, but you saw the way he winced, the way he stumbled back and bit his tongue in any attempt to keep his noise of pain at bay.

Caitlin's eyes were wide with fury. “You didn't tell me that!”

Matt blinked. “I didn't think it was-”

“You know what? If you two bonded so well on this mission, why don't you just go off with each other, huh?”

Matt's eyes widened. Your heart stopped, the crowd around you suddenly going eerily silent.

“Cate-”

“Don't call me that,” Caitlin hissed, slapping Matt's shoulders yet again. “I have had it up to here with trusting someone who would rather spend more time with some other person than me! I deserve better than that, Matt Holt! Much better!”

“It's for the mission!” Matt exclaimed. Lance had already awkwardly ducked out of the room, Pidge and Hunk following close behind him. Shiro glanced at you, silently asking whether or not you wanted him to stay to keep track of things – you simply nodded towards the door, giving him all the permission he needed. He grabbed Keith's arm and steered him out of the room, leaving you alone with the arguing couple.

“It just seems like you want to spend every moment you can with Y/N and not me,” Caitlin was saying. “Why should I put up with that?”

It was that question that spiked your fury, the genuine tinge of betrayal in her voice. She had the nerve to ask Matt why she should bother with him when he had put up with her bullshit for months now. He had suffered through abuse and insults and being made to feel tiny for her to lose her mind over something as petty and childish as this.

You gritted your teeth and risked a step forward. “Are you-”

Caitlin whirled on you. “And you stay out of this, you bitch!” And then she swung her arm, her long nails raking across the flesh of your cheek. You cried out, stumbled back with the force of the blow – it wasn't so much her strength, but more the shock that came with the sudden slap.

Your eyes watered, blurring your vision, but not enough for you to be unable to see Matt taking a step forward. He grabbed Caitlin around the waist, lifted her behind him even as she kicked and screamed and clawed at the air in any attempt to reach you.

Matt set her down and immediately rushed to your side. You hadn't even realised you had fallen over until he was beside you, gently stroking the hair away from your neck, whispering words to you that made no sense past the thrumming of blood in your ears.

Caitlin cried out. “Look at this! You go straight to them even though I'm right here!”

“Would you just be quiet!” Matt suddenly roared. You flinched back, the volume of his voice stunning you – never before had you heard him be quite so aggressive. This was Matt you were talking about; sweet, delicate Matt who wouldn't hurt a single soul even if his life depended on it.

He didn't cast her a glance even after he yelled. Caitlin was stunned into silence, her arms wrapped tight around her middle, her eyes firm on the back of Matt's head as she watched him help you up, one hand firm on your elbow to steady you. You could walk. You were perfectly fine bar the scratches currently oozing blood upon your cheek, but you stumbled nonetheless. The shock had gotten to you, the affects of the last two minutes making it difficult for you to even concentrate on a simple task such as walking.

“Let's go. Come on,” Matt whispered, leading you out the door. He didn't look back at Caitlin, but instead directed you to his room, where he sat you down on the bed before disappearing into the bathroom.

When he was gone, the ship seemed eerily quiet. You were so used to hearing Caitlin parading around the hallways, giving her usual orders or making her usual snarky remarks. You were used to hearing Shiro in the kitchen giving Lance a lecture on what he should and shouldn't be eating, was so used to Hunk and Colleen talking about the different kinds of plants that could be used within different recipes. You were so used to noise that the sudden silence had you feeling numb, unsure where to direct your thoughts.

They zoned in on what just happened, no matter how hard you tried to get them to focus elsewhere. Matt's face. Caitlin's words. What she could have done had Matt not grabbed her. What she will do whenever Matt and her finally came face-to-face again.

You shivered at the thought.

“Pull my blanket over you if you're cold.”

You jumped, head snapping towards the bathroom where Matt was standing in the doorway, busy stirring a tablet into some water.

“I'm fine,” you croaked out. “You look a little shaken up.”

He did. His eyes were now veined as he tried to fight back tears, his cheeks pale and sunken in.

He glanced up and shrugged, wading over to you with the cup in his hand. He placed it on the bed side table before hesitantly lowering himself onto the mattress beside you.

“I didn't know she was gonna go for you.”

“I know you didn't.” You shrugged. “It doesn't matter. What's done is done now.”

“You shouldn't be thinking like that. She hurt you, Y/N.”

You bit your tongue; you so desperately wanted to bring up the fact that she had been hurting him from the very beginning of their relationship, both emotionally and physically. The manipulation you had seen Matt play victim to was scary, and the fact that he was so oblivious to it was even scarier.

Matt sighed and trailed his hands through his hair. “I'll talk to her. I'll – I'll tell her to get help.”

“She's not staying on this ship.” Even as you said it, you knew the decision was final. You had family on this ship, people you loved and cared for – you would fight till the ends of the earth if it meant getting her away from them.

Matt froze. When he spoke, his voice was small and strained with his efforts of not crying. “She can change.”

“She won't,” you replied bluntly. “She's had her chances, and you know that. So you can either go with her or stay – but I'm not putting my family in danger by keeping her here. Not any more.”

Matt pushed his palms into his eyes, as if doing so could somehow push this conversation back. “I've been such an idiot, haven't I?”

Your head jerked in his direction. “What-”

“You told me on the ship today,” he said. “You told me I was smarter than this, and I am. It's just . . . . I thought I was in love, Y/N.”

You swallowed thickly. This had definitely not been the direction you had been expecting the conversation to go. You had wanted to talk to him about this issue for months, but now that he was initiating it, every long-willed and emotional speech you had mentally prepared had disappeared into the back of your mind.

“She treated me well at the start,” he croaked out. “We were happy. And then she got comfortable, thought she could start controlling me, and I let her. I just – did whatever she told me to because I thought that would stop her from lashing out. But then even doing what she said wasn't enough. I couldn't do the things I wanted to do without her getting mad at me, claiming I was leaving her out or favouring someone else over her.”

“You were being manipulated, Matt. None of us understands how that feels. Nobody can blame you until they've experienced it themselves.” Matt shook his head, lower lip trembling. “Why did it take her hurting you for me to finally realise who she is?”

Your breath hitched, the scratches on your face suddenly burning. “I don't – I don't know.”

“I've never felt so angry at her,” he continued. “She's thrown a glass at me, and I didn't feel as angry at her then as I do now.”

“Matt-”

“I'm not thinking straight,” he grumbled, standing up before you had a chance to grab for his arm. He stumbled towards the door, gripping his hair into a ponytail at the nape of his neck before letting it fall and cascade down his back again. “You can leave when you're ready. I'm gonna go and find some fresh air.”

You made to stand up. “Matt, let's just talk about this. You can't go out there on your own. Not when you're like this.”

He waved a dismissive hand in your direction, swallowing thickly. For a second, he looked like he was about to say something, but then his eyes fell to the floor and he shook his head, leaving you behind with not a single word spoken.

+++

They were arguing again. It sounded bad. Worse than before.

You were sat upright in bed this time, leaning your head back against the wall with your eyes closed. The covers were draped over the top of your knees, even as they were bunched up to your chest, a way to stabilise yourself as you listened in to Caitlin's screaming and Matt's calm responses that never seemed to get him any further forward.

Already two glasses had smashed. You heard them crash against the wall, followed abruptly by Matt saying, “You didn't have to do that,” as if his calm and collected demeanour was going to do anything at all for the fury Caitlin was feeling. Caitlin had laughed at him, called him stupid before she went back to screaming at the top of her lungs over something you had yet to catch on to.

You had a fairly good idea, though. It had to be about earlier, about Matt protecting you over her. There was no other logical explanation, nothing else Matt could have done that would have angered Caitlin so much.

It must have been around one in the morning when the argument finally started to cease. Caitlin got quieter, no more glasses were being smashed, Matt had gone completely silent-

And then something crashed against the wall.

You jerked upright immediately, pure terror sinking through your body. You were scrambling out of the covers before you even had a chance to comprehend what was going on, throwing yourself towards the door and yanking it open just in time for Matt to yank his own bedroom door open and come flooding out. He didn't spare you a glance when he turned the corner and all-but-sprinted down the hallway.

Your eyes flicked to the open door. Caitlin stood there, gripping the door frame with whitening knuckles, panting heavily. There was blood on her palm, a piece of glass dropped to the floor beside her; she looked insane. She looked utterly, completely insane and there was a side of you now that wanted to dive towards her and pummel her.

But you glanced back down the hallway to where Matt had just fled, and you realised that he was much more important than her.

You turned back to Caitlin. “What did you do to him?”

She looked up at you through the tips of her eyelids, her dark hair scraggled and hanging in her eyes. She didn't give you a proper answer, merely shrugged and said, “I'm sure he wants you right now, so you can find out then.”

You didn't have time to argue, didn't have time to piece together her snide little comment. You shoved yourself off the door frame and dashed down the hall towards Matt, heart thumping at a million miles per hour; he was going to be hurt. He was going to be hurt, and heartbroken, because maybe now he had finally come to terms with the truth. No matter how evil you saw Caitlin, no matter how evil she genuinely was, Matt had loved her at one point. He had been so deep beneath her spell that, despite the abuse she had given him, he still would have gone to the ends of the earth for her.

You rounded the corner, and there he was.

Curled up at the end of the hallway, half hidden behind shadows cast from the window above him. He rubbed at his wrist roughly, something he always did when he was fighting off the urge to cry; you had seen it many of times, and every single time, it completely broke your heart.

“Matt,” you choked out. He didn't look up. He didn't really need to. He simply closed his eyes and let his head fall forward, letting the first few tears slip down his cheeks. He was with you now. He could cry if he wanted to.

You kneeled down beside him and placed a gentle hand on his arm. He stopped rubbing his wrist, glanced up at you and shook his head; it was a simple gesture, one that portrayed his message perfectly.

It's over.

You nodded back, pulling his hand into your lap and intertwining your fingers with his. He shuffled closer to you, his knee clipping against your own, and the two of you sat in the warm comfort that came with the silence. Neither of you needed to talk. Neither of you needed to comfort the other person, or make up some bullshit excuse as to why you were sitting in a hallway with tears streaming down your face – just being there, with Matt by your side and his hand in your own, was enough for you. It was enough for both of you.

Hours must have passed before the silence was finally shattered and Matt spoke up. His voice was groggy, thick with unshed tears and memories of what – you hoped – he was leaving behind.

“I should have listened to you.”

You rubbed your thumb against his own. “You don't have to think about her any more. I'll make sure – I'll make sure you're safe.”

“I don't want pity.”

“I'm not giving you pity. I'm being a good friend.”

Matt closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the wall.

“What did it?” you asked before your nerve could splinter. He creaked open one eye, pinched his brows together in confusion. You inhaled before elaborating. “What did she do this time that was so different from all them other times? What made you finally decide to leave?”

Matt didn't stiffen, didn't shy away from the personal question. His grip on your hand tightened that little bit more before he opened both of his eyes and glanced down at your joined fingers. Bracelets hung loosely around his wrist, the string tickling your flesh but you did not pull away. Not when he started messing idly with your fingers, plucking each one and letting it snap back against his leg in a way you could only describe as childish.

It was nice to see him relax for a change.

“She threatened to kill you.”

Your breath left you in one clean swoop. Your head snapped round, eyes wide and heart thundering – and yet you did not move, even though every instinct in your body was screaming for you to stand up and confront Caitlin before she could become even more of a threat. That was what you had been trained to do – dismiss the threat, get rid of anyone who may be willing to hurt you or your family.

But you stayed beside Matt, staring at the side of his head as the world tilted and disappeared until it was only him that you could properly concentrate on.

He pursed his lips, not looking at you when he continued. “She's not safe to be around. I should have realised that sooner, but – but before, she was just hurting me. Mentally, physically, but it was just me and I could deal with that. But then tonight...” He bit his lip, started messing with the ring on your finger. “Tonight she said she was going to kill you, and I snapped. I realised what you had been telling me was true the entire time, so I stormed out. She tried to throw a glass at my head when I was walking out, but I think she ended up cutting herself instead-”

“She did,” you burst out, because you just needed to talk, just needed to say something. “She – She sliced her palm open.”

Matt nodded. “I didn't go back even though I heard her cry out.” He looked at you. “That's – That's progress, isn't it? I can – I can get over her.”

You had never been one for affection. You had been trained in the art of being completely heartless when you needed to be, but it was different with Matt. You reached over, wrapped your arms around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug before you could think about your own actions – and it was natural.

His head dipped into the crook of your neck and it was there that he started crying. There were no sobs, no racking shoulders and hysteric screams. The only sign you really had that he was finally letting go was the damp tears sliding onto your flesh. You reached up and ran your hands through his hair, letting him cry because this was what he needed. It was what he had needed for months, and you were honoured to be the one he trusted enough to finally let it happen.

+++

“Happy Valentines Day!”

You looked up, startled at the sudden loud noise that had emitted from the doorway. With your headphones dangling around your ears and your sweatpants rolled up to your knees, you did not look ready to go on a surprise Valentines Day date.

Which seemed to be exactly what Matt had planned.

He stood in the doorway wearing his Spiderman pyjamas, an unopened cake in his hand alongside a bottle of wine that you knew neither of you would finish. It was the same every celebration – Matt would spend plenty of money on alcohol, only for you to both get so absorbed in conversation that you would forget about it until it no longer interested you.

Your computer and the work within it went ignored as you stood up and dashed towards the door, grabbing the cake out of Matt's hands. He smiled at you.

“That's the first thing you grab for?” he teased, raising a brow.

You grinned, leaning up and pressing a kiss to his lips before you span on your heel and dashed back towards the bed, flopping down upon it with the boxed cake balancing on your knee. “Where did you find the time to do all this?”

“It wasn't difficult,” he replied, sitting down next to you, pulling two forks out of his back pocket. “Not when you've been working all day. I've barely seen you.”

You sighed. “I'm sorry. I'm a bit behind on work, and-”

“Don't apologise,” he scoffed, shoving the fork into your hand. “I can see you now, and that's all I care about. Now, let's eat.” He stretched out across the bed, placing one hand behind his head. “And tell me all about how your Valentines Day without your boyfriend has been.”

You rolled your eyes. “You really know how to make a person feel bad.”

He grinned. “I'm teasing. I know how hard you work.” He sat bolt upright. “But from here until tomorrow morning, you're not doing any more work. We're gonna take as many hours out of Valentines Day as we possibly can, whether we-”

You cut him off by crying out, the cake on your fork having spilled and landed directly on your shirt.

Matt's flinch was unmistakable, as you had seen it plenty of times before. His entire body jerked, his hands flying up to cover his face as if he expected you to swing for him – it broke your heart every time it happened.

As soon as his eyes met yours and he realised what had happened, he relaxed. He rolled his eyes, pretending he hadn't just completely lost himself for a moment in believing you were going to hurt him. He leaned forward and started dabbing at the front of your shirt, shaking his head like a disappointed dad.

But whilst he was used to his own reflexes, you couldn't let it drop like that. You stared at him for a moment, before reaching up and taking his hand in your own. He froze, shocked at the sudden movement, risked giving you a tiny, confused smile before you leaned in and pressed your lips to his own.

He hummed against your mouth, eyes widening for only a moment before he pulled away and raised a brow. “What was that for?”

“She's gone,” you whispered, and he froze. “You know I'd never hurt you, Matt. You don't have to be scared any more.”

Matt's features softened with realisation. He hadn't even fully noticed that he had flinched, that he still flinched every time a loud noise sounded around him. It had been two years since Caitlin had been banished from the castle ship, and still the remains of her abuse lingered in the back of Matt's brain.

He pressed his forehead to your own. “I know. It's reflex. I'm – I'm sorry.”

“Don't apologise,” you said, quoting his previous words. “I love you.”

Matt smiled, pressed a soft kiss to the tip of your nose before he whispered, “I love you more.”

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gfmima · 2 years ago

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category : ヴォルトロン work title : reuniting with him once he returns to earth

“is this a dream?”

keith can’t believe it was happening.

it was too surreal.

after years apart, he found his way back to you. tears gather in the inner corner of his eyes as he takes a good look of your face, and the weight of his emotions soon dawn on him. it felt like ages since he’s reveled in the comfort of your presence; since he’s seen your face; since he felt your touch and heard your voice. he tried to control his tears, though, it was futile in the end.

droplets cascade down his pale cheeks while small hiccups wrack through his body as he weeps.

he didn’t want to show it but he was scared, so very scared. he had no idea what to expect when he returned to earth. whereas the other paladins got to reunite with their loved ones, he wasn’t as fortunate. unlike them, he wasn’t so sure if he has anyone waiting for him anymore. he knew he could always visit your place himself, however, he also knew there was a possibility that you wouldn’t want to see his face after he left without any explanation.

it took a lot of convincing from shiro for him to come to you.

every step he took towards your apartment’s front door was arguably more distressing than what he had to encounter in the frontlines. emotionally, i guess. each step came with a new question floating inside his mind. do you still live here? what if you turn him away? or way worse, what if someone else greets him? someone who took his original spot in your heart?

he sounds selfish for saying this but he didn’t care. not right now. he had begged fate that you hadn’t move on from him; that he continues to hold a piece of your heart while living galaxies away; that you still love him as deeply and madly as he loves you. to his luck, life was in his favor. everything’s a blur — all he could recall is knocking on your door, fingers crossed that nobody but you answers, before he was pulled into a tight embrace.

“maybe…” he utters, thoughtfully.

“what do you mean?” you whisper in his ear.

“maybe this isn’t a dream.” keith pulls back and looks down at you with a silver of mischief in his eyes, causing itty-bitty butterflies in your stomach as it did amidst the beginning of your relationship.

he raises hand and cups your cheek. your palm leaves small goosebumps across his skin as it lays over his. you feel the heat emitting his hand when you press your palm against it even further. you gaze at his features. he looks far different from how you last remember him. granted, half a decade passed and it was only natural that he matured. besides the scar on his jaw, he was the same old keith.

your keith.

his hold on you lingers for a second longer, concentrated on taking in every detail of your face. you stand completely still when his head slightly lowers until his nose brushes against yours. your breath hitches once he finally slots his lips in yours.

he missed you.

god, did he miss you.

his rough hands tenderly hold your face while his eyes swim with tears at your smile. they slowly slide down your arms and circle around your torso to bring you in a hug. he wasn’t sure if he wanted to cry or laugh. a burst of emotions dowse over him — good and bad. he��s been dreaming for this day to come for so long that it felt unreal to see it unfold.

it was an open secret that you were one of the main reasons for him to keep pushing during his capture, to continue living. he’d distract himself with the fantasy of coming back home to you, of explaining what happened to him, of telling you that he never meant to leave without saying goodbye to you. in the past, he felt rather stupid, also a tad pathetic, for dreaming about such idyllic scenarios.

matt was relieved to know it wasn’t for nothing.

“it’s you!” he cries, bordering on a whimper, “it’s really you!”

it was as if a heavy weight was just lifted off his shoulder. he rests his chin on your shoulder to draw him closer to you. any more, and you expect your bodies to merge into one. he then moves to bury his face in your hair, his hand fixes itself on the back of your neck to keep you in place.

he needed to ground himself. it felt too good to be real.

you appear to carry the same sentiment because you return his embrace and shed a couple tears over your long-anticipated reunion. it was like seeing the impossible turn to reality. he draws you in closer, tighter until you were calm as well.

“i-i can’t believe i-it,” he sniffles, doing his best to compose himself. “it’s you! i’m actually with you!” he continues to repeat his words like a broken record, unable to accept that the wait was over. no more wishful thinking because you’re here with him, he’s here with you.

“yes, it is me! welcome home, matt,” you greet with a weak laugh.

instead of lightening the mood, it drives him to begin crying again and harder than he previously did. it was nearing towards a wail. he missed the sound of your laugh. it pained him to remember that he almost forgot it during his time up in space. it eased his mind to see you hadn’t forgotten about him. he was grateful to know you believed he’d find a way back to you; overjoyed to find you greet him with open arms.

it was an understatement to say you have never seen him in such a state. deep down, it frightened you. did you say something you shouldn’t have? he must’ve felt you tense up since he places his hand under your jawline before he slowly tilts your head back to look him in the eyes.

“i’ve been waiting for this day to come,” he confesses, arms returning to envelop you in his clutches. you both spend the following minutes savoring each other’s company, uncaring of the world outside.

#keith kogane x reader #keith x reader #matt holt x reader #matt x reader #voltron x reader #vld x reader

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moonpiies · 2 years ago

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voltron !

keith kogane

҂ dating keith kogane headcanons

҂ keith kogane headcanons

lance mcclain

҂ lance mcclain x short!reader

matt holt

҂ matt holt with a strong s/o

#voltron x reader #vld #keith kogane x reader #lance mcclain x reader #matt holt x reader

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maandags · 4 years ago

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Requests are open!!! *does an excited hoppy dance* oh my goodness the excitement. May I suggest a) something with Matt Holt, perhaps in an au with some sort of power (like a demigod or witch or ATLA au, etc.) or b) something for HTTYD with no pairing and plenty of dragon presence! Bonding/interacting with dragons, etc. Thankyouthankyouthankyou you are such an amazingly skilled author and making requests like this is a very special privilege. Thank you for sharing your writing :)

it’s Capture the Flag day at Camp Halfblood, and nobody lets you forget it.

of course, the nervous jitters get to you, as well. you’re not immune, even though you’ve never been a particular lover of the game. but it’s Camp tradition, and Camp Halfblood is your home, so you’ll fuck up your friends (and not-so-friends) every once in a while to keep things interesting. sure.

it’s Hephaestus, Demeter, Ares, Apollo -- that’s you -- against Athena, Aphrodite, Hermes, and Dionysus. you’re not worried about Dionysus’ kids -- their heart isn’t in the game, and it’s easy to tell. Athena and Hermes are the ones who will pose an actual problem, you suspect.

as you get ready, fingers making quick work of the straps on your breastplate, swinging your quiver over your shoulder (holding blunt-tipped arrows -- so they’ll still hurt like a bitch, but won’t do serious damage); strapping on your bracer, then pulling on your leather glove. you reach for your helmet, fighting the urge to roll your eyes at the red plume sticking out of it. it’s tradition, Y/N.

“you think you’re gonna win today, L/N?”

you squint up at the boy decked out in full Capture the Flag regalia, a sword at his side and a knife strapped to his thigh, brown hair mussed and glasses slightly askew on his nose. “half your team aren’t fighters, Matt. not like you and I am.” you lean back, cross your arms. “let’s just say I’m not disliking my chances, here.”

Matt shakes his head with a grin. “we’re going to crush you.”

“HOLT!” both of you whip around to the source of the voice -- it belongs to a tall Hermes kid, one of the only campers older than Matt and you, standing with his hands on his hips, glaring intensely at his teammate. “stop fraternizing with the enemy!”

Matt snickers, then bows. “well. I guess duty calls. I’ll see you after we win the game.”

“you’re so full of shit.”

“I love you, too.”

as he turns, you shout after him, “I’ve got an arrow with your name on it, Holt!”

the team captains convene -- Matt’s sister Pidge, on one side, and an Ares kid named Tyler on yours. the flags are hidden, everyone moves to their side of the creek. as you walk, Tyler and Keith, a Hephaestus kid, go through the battle plan one more time. you’ve heard it countless times before, so you listen with one ear.

Tyler points to you. “Y/N, up in the trees. slow ‘em down as much as you can.”

“always, boss.”

“don’t get distracted by brown-haired sons of Athena,” Keith quips with a grin.

without missing a beat, you reply, “as long as you don’t get distracted by blue-eyed sons of Aphrodite, fuckwad.” Keith goes red and shoves his middle finger in your face, so you respond in kind.

“guys,” Tyler says, sounding both annoyed and tired and resigned, “focus, please.”

some obscene gestures and mouthed insults later, you’re stationed up in your tree, standing on a sturdy branch, bow at the ready, an arrow nocked. (special arrows. Keith helped out with this; you’ve got some stinkbombs, some explosive arrows, some sticky ones... they’re nasty. you can’t wait to use them.) you’ve tied yourself to the tree by your waist, having made the mistake of not doing so in the past and paying the price with bruises and cuts.

the horn sounds. the game’s begun.

border duty isn’t the most exciting part of the game. if you were a close-range fighter, you would have killed to be in the scouting group, or the flag-capturing group. but you’re not, so a spot up in the trees it is.

after a couple minutes, you spot the group of campers charged with capturing the actual flag leap over the creek like cheetahs, splitting up into two groups immediately after crossing over into the other side. despite everything, your heart rate speeds up, just a bit. your grip on the nocked arrow tightens.

then, out of the depths of the forest in front of you, three campers race towards your side of the creek. trying to go fast, while also being quiet. heh. not if you have anything to say about it.

you bring your bow up to your face and aim, loosing it almost immediately. elegantly. effortlessly, as Matt would say. it sinks into the earth in front of the nearest camper with a dull thud, and a split second later it explodes, sending dirt and loose branches and leaves everywhere.

before the three campers can do anything to react, you’ve let loose another arrow. this one, when it explodes, poofs out a cloud of thick red smoke, which rises high above the treetops. could just as well have been a flare. stealth mission? not so much.

but you’ve given yourself away, now. not that it matters much, now. worth it.

“FUCK YOU, Y/N!” that’s Lance. son of Aphrodite, one of the few who is actually invested in the game. (a little too invested, in your opinion.)

you blow him a kiss, send him a wave. “I love you, too!”

Lance yanks his fellow campers up, shakes his fist up at you. “you play dirty!”

“I’ve been here for eleven years, Lance. I deserve to play a little dirty.”

at that, Lance laughs. you narrow your eyes. “eleven years, huh?” he grins. “still can’t recognise a simple distraction?”

“what are you –” you cut yourself off, cursing, whirling around, only just managing to spot a head of brown hair zipping through the trees.

before you realise you’re doing it, you’ve already drawn another arrow. this time, as you pull it back, you breathe out, relaxing, concentrating on the tiny shifts of movement you can still see through the trees. behind you, Lance is still shouting – “he’s gone, Y/N, we’ve outsmarted you, just admit it, you’re gonna lose –” but you drown him out.

you let the arrow fly, and a whole second later there’s the unmistakable “augh!” of someone who just ate shit. (tangling arrow: its impact triggers the uncoiling of a spool of iron thread, hopelessly tangling the target’s legs.)

you throw Lance a glance over your shoulder. he throws up his hand. “for the GODS’ SAKES, Y/N.”

“do not,” you say, lips curling into a grin when you spot your group of flag-catchers, three strong, approaching from the other side of the river, the silver Athena banner rippling between them, “underestimate a child of Apollo.”

Keith and Tyler are being chased by a growing group of blue-plumed campers, but you know it’s no use; those two are fast bastards. for the fun of it, you send another exploding arrow towards the pursuers’ ankles. the dull pop! and consequent yelps make you grin.

Keith takes a final leap over the creek and skids to a halt on the other side. the banner shifts in his hand, from silver to blood-red.

he holds it above his head, and you let out a loud whoop before sticking two fingers in your mouth and letting out an insanely loud, piercing whistle.

the game is over. you’ve won.

you descend from your tree, dropping the last five feet to the ground, shaking your head at the mob of campers who’ve hoisted Keith and Tyler upon their shoulders and are jumping up and down. you cross your arms.

“fucking eh. I really thought we had you this time.”

an arm drapes itself around your shoulders, and you grin, shooting a glance up at your boyfriend. “I told you I had an arrow with your name on it.”

“you did. I’ll outrun you eventually.” Matt dips down, presses a kiss to your cheek.

“pfft. good luck with that. you almost fooled me this time, though,” you add, poking his side. “almost.” you look down at his red-streaked legs. his knees are also scraped and slightly bloody, but his eyes are twinkling with mirth. “sorry about your ankles.”

he sighs. “yeah. I think I’ll need someone to carry me back to camp.”

you shake your head again with a chuckle, leaning your head on his shoulder. “you’re so full of shit.”

#gaaaaa #THANK U ANON U R THE SWEETEST!!!!#SORRY FOR THE WAIT! I HOPE U ARE STILL HERE AND WILL READ THIS!! LMK IF U DO!#request #vld request #matt holt x reader

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justsomevoltronstuff · 4 years ago

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(2/2) i either laugh at everything or have a resting bitch face ~ ppl say i look intimidating & mad but im an awkward bean. i tend to handle others needs/problems before my own & hold in my problems until i burst :( im lowkey such a nerd & usually always reading or listening to music (Conan Gray uwu) I love cheesy 80's movies, anything related to crime & mystery, writing, fashion, animals, anime & superheroes. im really blunt, love forehead kisses & memes! Thanks! i say uwu way too much uwu

BOTH OF MY BABIES IN ONE NIGHT AJDJDKENF hello booboo🥰🥰

ikr, soft Keith is best Keith we stan frfr🤧

I ship my bby~

Matt Holt

The uwu Couple

Ok look; I tried really fuckin hard, I truly did, but after literally every single conversation we’ve ever had I just couldn’t find anyone else to ship you with booboo😔🤚 but im insisting you get one of the Paladins too so👀 ,,,,, n e wayz, Matt is also super intimidating but awkward asf, the two of you kinda just simp for each other 24/7. He knows your tendency to put everyone before yourself and also ensures to put you before himself and insists on you exploding to him anytime you need it, he’d rather you release the energy now than let it build up. You two are total geeks and can and will read/listen to music together. Slow dances in the kitchen at 4am? I think yes. Swears he thinks 80s movies are cheesy and distasteful but secretly loves them and very much enjoys watching them with you. He appreciates your tendency to be clinch and adores the blush he can get from you every time he kissss your forehead. Overall 100% soft nerd love.

also~

Lance

The Cheesy Couple

Honestly he’s constantly got a happy-go-lucky face on, so his joy paired with your intimidation highkey makes the two of you a pretty terrifying couple to pass on the street. He loves to tease you for looking like a badass but acting like a baby, honestly thinks you’re so fuckin adorable. Loves re-enacting 80 movies cliches (such as the sixteen candles back pocket snuggle (yes I knew what that was before watching To All The Boys I Loved Before bc I’m CULTURED)). Is probably the type to buy mystery games just so the two of you can play detective together. Honestly just adores you and everything you do and will not hesitate to drown you in kithes.

~Admin Rori💜

#matt holt x reader #lance mcclain x reader #voltron imagines #voltron #voltron legendary defender #lance mcclain #matt holt #voltron x reader #matt x reader #lance x reader #vld matchup #admin rori

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multi-fandom-asks · 5 years ago

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Crushing on Matt and Pidge noticing and deciding to help?(she thinks they would make a cute couple)

who wouldn’t have a crush on Matt tbh

enjoy, darling!

(a sprinkle of angst ahead - but a very happy ending)

Pidge catches on easily to the fact that you have a massive crush on Matt

so she becomes your designated wingwoman

you and Matt in the same room? time for her and everybody else to take their leave

she knows it’s not her place to inform Matt of your crush on him; but she does her best to give hints

“maybe Y/N wants to go with you!”

“I think Y/N would like that shirt on you”

“hey Matt, Y/N’s looking sad. maybe you should to talk to them”

and this boy. never. puts. two and two. together

both you and Pidge are kinda annoyed with it but neither of you wanna overstep any boundaries

I mean, he’s looking for his missing father, he’s a vital part in defeating a tremendous threat, and he’s obviously got eyes for Allura

so he’s probably not interested

but you’re still so hopelessly head over heels for him

Pidge is eventually tired of your gentle flirting being met with generic, dense responses

so she implements a plan

she does a fuck ton of preparation for this

everyone helps - because everyone knows how deeply you’ve grown to care for the elder Holt sibling

Pidge lets you in on the plan; and you’re petrified that it’s gonna go horribly wrong

but she assures you that it will work

and when you’re suddenly alone in the lounge with Matt, you realize-

holyshitimalonewithhim

Matt suddenly starts getting all flustered and blush-y

he scratches his cheek, has trouble looking you in the eyes, and can barely string together a sentence

“so...we’re alone. isn’t that unusual?” you say, trying to mellow the leaden air around you

Matt chuckles “yeah, it is. I don’t mind it though”

your heart skips a beat

“well, that’s very sweet. I don’t mind it either”

more awkward silence

but you’re feeling pretty warm and fuzzy and so is he

silence...silence...and more silence

and then Matt makes a joke, and he thinks he’s harmless

“is this the part where you confess your love for me?”

you whip around, not realizing it’s a joke

“are you leading me on or something?“

his eyebrows arch in confusion

“wait, what-what are you talking about?”

you tear up, half out of anger and half out of embarrassment

“please stop...I just....I’m such an idiot”

“hang on, Y/N, listen to me. I was making a joke!”

he pauses, placing a gentle hand on your arm

Do you...do you actually like me?”

“oh my-YES”

Matt bursts into surprised laughter, hugging you close to him

“I’m the idiot here. I’ve never been good at picking up signals or hints-“

“obviously” you snort

“shush, you. I really like you a lot, Y/N. and if you wanna see where this goes, I’d be more than okay with that”

you smile, squeezing him tight

you’ll definitely have to thank Pidge later

- mod Aoi 🌺

#matt x reader voltron #matt holt x reader #matt holt #voltron matt #voltron matt holt #vld #voltron #voltron legendary defender #voltron x reader #reader insert #answered ask #x reader #pidge gunderson

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ifanfictionella · 4 years ago

Text

So 8 think it's been long enough.... Voltron next gen fic anyone?

#voltron netflix #voltron #Voltron #voltron shiro #bna shirou #pidgeon #pidge #vld pidge #pidge x reader #hunk x pidge #matt holt #allura #lotura

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girlboypersonthingy · 1 year ago

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can I request a list of like green flags and red flags for each of the characters in voltron? btw I love your writing:)

Hello friendo, thank you sm! Thanks for the request, I adore this idea. Also…Sorry y’all, I was posting like every other day for two weeks and then I hopped off for like two months. Oof life is really life-ing rn. I honestly chose to write this prompt before a lot of other requests bc it seems like an easy and short thing to bust out quickly. I swear, I will get to the rest eventually 🩵 keep sending in requests if you’d like! And as always… ENJOY~

KEITH ❤️

Red Flags 🚩

TERRIBLE AT COMMUNICATING. We all know Keith is stubborn and easily overwhelmed with a short temper. He doesn’t really know how to talk to people without getting angry. He feels that bc he has a hard time explaining exactly what he means, people never understand him and that makes him mad.

Bro isn’t scared of anything…and that low key scares everyone else. Like…who isn’t afraid of anything? The whole team has tried sooooo hard to figure out what will get Keith to jump out of his skin and scream like a child but to no avail… Boy just doesn’t flinch, doesn’t care, couldn’t care less about bugs and rodents and clowns and heights or anything like that.

Wears his gloves in the shower sometimes. Like wtf ???

Green Flags ✅

Also bc he is not afraid of anything, boy will protect his friends/family/partner SO HARD. He will verbally AND physically tear someone apart just for looking at you the wrong way. Very protective and caring but in a good way ya know?

Actually very selfless and not self-centered in the slightest. Keith is very giving and helpful, despite his tough exterior, he’s very caring, observant and considerate. He’ll give the shirt off his back to someone in need. He’s always down to help others. Ugh Sweet heart ❤️‍🔥

Has a sick ass space wolf that will also protect you like COSMO IS A MAJOR PLUS OKAY BIG GREEN FLAG DOGGO

LANCE 💙

Red Flags 🚩

Obvi his biggest red flag is how flirty he is. Boy will flirt with anything that breaths and that can get really annoying sometimes and affect the rest of the team.

Jealous AS FUCK. Like the petty jealous type. Lance is the kind of guy to pretend he has a partner back home just bc some alien girl he was flirting with said she had a partner already. He’s like “OH YEAH? Wow cool me too, same same, yeah….” But homie’s ego is a bit sore now…

Lies a lot. Lance just panics sometimes and tells a lie. He knows it’s wrong and he always feels guilty after lying to someone but it always just slips out. His mouth moves faster than his brain most the time.

Green Flags ✅

THE BEST HUGGER/CUDDLER OMFGGGGGG. Lance is the best hugger and cuddle buddy ever, period, end of story, try to change my mind. His long arms always stretch fully around the recipient’s torso and he squeezes tight enough to make you feel warm but not smothered. Usually will rest his chin on the other person’s head if they’re short enough (so Pidge obvi).

Very aware of other’s moods/body language/tone of voice. Everyone thinks Lance is “the dumb one” but he’s actually very in tune with what’s going on in the moment, what’s going on around him. I think he can tell how others feel the second he sees them. Good intuition kinda thing. An empath for sure.

Very considerate and often remembers the little things about people. Does he remember what he learned in class just a couple days ago? Pffft heck no! Does he remember everyone’s birthday, every year and get them a very thoughtful gift? HELL YEAHH I LOVE THIS SWEET BOY OMFG 🩵

SHIRO 🖤

Red Flags 🚩

Honestly…idfk Shiro is so perf. Perfect baby boy all the way

Maybe he could seem too nice at first…? Like when someone is nice but ur like “are you for real? Or are you fake and evil and you’re hiding something?” I think Shiro could be perceived as being fake nice at first.

Omg I feel like Shiro is one of those “ oh no, that looks delicious but I can’t. I’m watching my carbs.” YOU KNOW SHIRO IS A GYM DUDE WHO COUNTS HIS CALORIES PLZ

Green Flags ✅

ALSO AN A+ HUGGER. Imagine those big ass arms holding you so softly and so close to his big, warm body. Omg so comforting, so relaxing. Often gives a gently squeeze just before letting go and pulling away. Ugh 😩❤️‍🔥

Literally the most trustworthy man in the universe. Will defend his friends, loved ones, and planet until the end of time. Shiro would die before revealing any secrets you’ve asked him to keep. The best person to vent to bc he’ll never tell another soul about it. He’s like a personal diary

Shiro is sooooo patient. Definitely the most patient one on the team. He really does take his own advice…ya know, patience yields focus 😌 very sweet, calm man. We love Shiro

PIDGE 💚

Red Flags 🚩

GIRL WILL WORK HERSELF TO DEATH PLZ GO CHECK UP ON HER, BRING HER FOOD AND WATER, GENTLY FORCE HER INTO BED SHE NEEDS SLEEP.

Lowkey kinda moody and can get snappy very easily. Pidge is a sweet heart and very smart and a good team player but she’s also stubborn and will yell to get her point across or make herself heard (she’s an Aries…what’d you expect?)

Sometimes very conceited and braggy about how smart she is. Like yeah Pidge, we know you’re a genius and you could code in your sleep. WE GET IT. UR SMART. GEEZ 😒

Green Flags ✅

Pidge is so baby. Yeah, she can get snappy and braggy sometimes but…SHES SO BABY PLZ FORGIVE HER. She’s just young and stressed okay? Give her a break. She’ll apologize eventually with puppy dog eyes and a soft voice and while she looks adorable, she is being sincere and really wants to resolve this.

Very loyal and determined. I mean look how hard she searched and fought for her dad and brother. She won’t stop for anything or anyone once she has her mind set. Pidge Will never leave you behind and will always turn back to help someone in need.

Androgynous royalty. Pidge is soooo chill about her gender and identity. We love a confident babe 🏳️‍🌈💚

HUNK 💛

Red Flags 🚩

Boy is too scared sometimes. I think Hunk has really bad anxiety and it’s not the anxiety that is the red flag, it’s how he copes with it…which he doesn’t. Hunk let’s his anxiety get the best if him sometimes…but he’s trying.

Honestly…does Hunk really have any other red flags??? Baby boy is so sweet idk 🤷🏻

Over eats to the point of getting sick sometimes…and never learns his lesson. (Me asf)

Green Flags ✅

THE SWEETEST MOST CONSIDERATE AND THOUGHTFUL MAN IN THE UNIVERSE OMFG WHAT A SWEET HEART 😩💛 honestly just a very good guy. We love Hunk.

Obvi his cooking skills!!! Can cook for any occasion, on any cooking surface, in any conditions. Can cook so many different dishes from so many rich cultures around the world! So talented. His food always hits.

THE ABSOLUTE BEST at cheering others up. Soooo funny and silly and kind and relatable. He tries so hard to brighten others’ days when they need it. Will stop what he’s doing just to go cheer up a friend or loved one and watch them smile again.

MATT 🧡

Red Flags 🚩

Interrupts A LOT. In any given conversation, he will interrupt and talk over someone else at least once every minute. Can get really annoying sometimes but in his defense, if he waits too long to speak up, he’ll just totally forget what he was gonna say.

Like Lance, I think Matt would be overly flirty and act like a Fuck boy sometimes. Like bro sit your nerd ass down, that person is SOOO out of your league plz chill.

Can not take anything seriously (unless it comes to his family or his or anyone else’s safety) but day to day, Matt makes so many dumb and inappropriate jokes at the worst times. Ugh 😒

Green Flags ✅

Very brotherly to everyone he considers a friend or family. Protective, constantly checking up on others, making sure they have eaten, asking if they need anything from him. He cares a lot. Bonus points bc he’s a very good brother to his actual sibling too. Aww Pidge and Matt are sibling goals. 🥹

HOT AS FUCK NO MATTER HIS HAIR STYLE/LENGTH. You can fight me on this. Matt is gorg and so is his hair at every single moment throughout the show.

Extremely accepting and open minded. Matt treats everyone he meets equally and never seems phased when he meets others so different from himself. He may ask some questions for the sake of his own curiosity, but would never pass judgment on another person.

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queenscene2 · 4 years ago

Link

CALLING ALL FELLOW MATT HOLT SIMPS

#matt holt #vld matt #matt voltron #voltron #voltron legendary defender #x reader fics #vld #vld fics

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moonpiies · 3 years ago

Note

My friend just got be back into Voltron because we were talking about how badly written most of the characters were so may i request Matt holt with a GN s/o who is very strong snd could just pick him up (bridal style or like any way you can pick someone up)

MATT HOLT X STRONG!READER

requested by @adusgaha (i couldn’t tag them properly)

pairing: matt holt x strong!reader

warning(s): none

note: i really like this request

he rolls his eyes playfully and agrees to let you try if you insist

you effortlessly pick him up bridal style and bring him to your shared room

he’s like: “bro what—”

this mf was blushing the entire time

simp

he thinks it’s totally badass that you can do it tho

he still worries that you might strain your back or break something

#matt holt #matt holt x reader #vld matt #voltron #voltron+x+reader+headcanons

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flipping-voltron-imagines · 5 years ago

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a matt holt req? maybe abt how long his hair was getting,, like before allura saved the multiverses it was long af and then when pidge n him were programming chip it was super short in comparison

Yo I love this. I hope this is alright~

when Matt got home you were so excited to see him

he looked so different yet so the same

his eyes were the same. still held a charming sparkle, still managed to make your stomach flip but also feel so much comfort when you looked into them

then again

his hair

when you saw his hair, you were kind of disturbed by how long it had gotten

“were there no barber shops in space?” you asked, flicking a piece of hair that had fallen into his eyes.

“You don’t like my man buns? I thought people liked those”

“Not this person. As soon as this is all over you are getting a haircut”

it took a while to convince him to cut his hair but when he did

oh boy

you liked it so much better

he actually used to complain about it getting in the way

sometimes you wondered if he was keeping it long just to keep you complaining

you had no idea he was even going to get a haircut

on day you saw him and he was acting strange, flipping his hair dramatically

the next day it was short

at first you felt mostly relief. No more complaining, no more begging him to get it cut

but then… a tiny flash of guilt

you hoped he wasn’t too bothered about your nagging

but then he thanked you and you felt better

His parents were very thankful as well

he never let it grow long again. He realized it was a lot easier to maintain when it was short

#vld #voltron #matt #holt #long hair #x reader #hc #head canon #head cannons #hcs

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maandags · 5 years ago

Text

maybe if he’d come back earlier everything would have been fine.

it wasn’t even in the middle of the night, like you’d read in the stories, or how you’d see in the films, where the long-lost lover finds their way back to the one they’d left behind and shows up on their doorstep at two in the morning, rousing them from their sleep.

no, it was a regular saturday afternoon, two p.m. instead of two a.m, and he was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, and the only thing that had visibly changed about him was the fact that his hair had gotten longer–and there also was a scar on his cheek. and one at the base of his neck. and another one cutting through his hairline. you wondered how many more old wounds his clothes hid.

“y/n,” Matt Holt said, and his voice had the audacity to sound like that–soft and relieved and full of sadness and on the verge of breaking–and you had never wanted to punch someone more.

you nodded, lips puckering out, and walked right past him, pulling the door shut behind you and making sure to clip his shoulder. you didn’t think you imagined the hurt flashing across his face. your hand didn’t even tremble when you shoved your keys into your car door, even though your vision was hazy.

you left him standing on your driveway, and you didn’t think you saw him move at all until he was out of your rear mirror’s sights.

–

he came back twice after that, and you closed the door in his face both times. it was getting increasingly difficult to ignore him–but he’d been missing for years, and you’d only just come to terms with him truly being gone. you’d only just accepted the fact that you really would never fall asleep in his arms again, and that you’d never hear the soft wobble of his voice first thing in the morning. you’d only just started to get whatever was left of your life back together.

you guessed you had been supposed to fly into his arms whenever he had first walked up to your front door. that was what the dainty and abandoned lover giddy with happiness would have done. in the stories. in the fairytales. where the prince saves the princess and they get a happy ending.

but you’d long ago realised that your life was no fairytale. that sometimes you didn’t get to have a happy ending.

when you’d gotten word of Matt disappearing, you had refused to even consider the possibility of him being dead despite the pitiful looks and awkward pats on the shoulder you’d received from your co-workers. lost in space, you remembered telling yourself over and over whenever you’d wake from another nightmare in which Matt’s corpse would be dumped on your doorstep. not dead. lost in space.

lost and found.

–

this time was different. it was in fact late at night when he returned, wringing his hands and his eyes cloudy. you narrowed your eyes at him from where you sat on the bench on your porch, pulling the quilt you’d lugged out closer around you and starting to get up, gathering up your mug of tea. you spared him one flitting look before reaching for the doorknob, but your hand froze in mid-air when he said, “please stop doing that.”

you didn’t turn. “doing what?”

“you know what. avoiding me. you won’t even look at me.”

it was true, of course. it hurt to look at him, to see him whole and very much alive and wonder what he saw when he looked at you.

“i don’t owe you anything.”

“i know. but i was hoping–i don’t know. i’m sorry.”

your hand came to rest on the doorknob, but you couldn’t bring yourself to turn it. instead you forced the words you’d been mulling over in your head for days to slip past your lips. “sorry for what? for disappearing on a mission i told you not to go on? for making me cry myself to sleep every night for years, thinking if i’d just been more insistant, just pushed a little harder, you would still have been here with me?” you barked out a bitter laugh. “Matt, you died years ago. you shouldn’t have come back.”

–

the worst part was that you knew it wasn’t his fault.

logically, of course. he couldn’t have controlled being kidnapped by aliens–it was all over the news. he and his team were a world-wide sensation–but you had been telling yourself for so long that he wouldn’t come back, and now that he had… it just felt fake, somehow.

no, that wasn’t it. your entire world had been snatched out from beneath you, and you hated feeling this helpless, powerless, everything spiralling out of your control. the careful lies you’d built to help you get through the days had been shattered in one word–your name from his lips.

you hated how he made you feel–how he still made you feel, even after you promised yourself you’d move on. you hated how in the small hours of the night you lay awake, wondering if he’d still feel the same way he used to, wanting to map his body out beneath your fingertips once more. rediscovering.

you hated the feeling of falling all over again.

–

and then you were standing in front of his house.

you didn’t know why your feet had felt the need to lead you all the way to the other side of town, to the house you’d been actively trying to avoid for years. but you had a feeling it was maybe time to start facing it.

you hadn’t had a nightmare as bad as the one you’d had this night in a long time. and you hadn’t woken screaming and crying, but dazed. numb. limbs feeling heavy enough that they seemed to sink right through the mattress, pulling you along with them. suffocating. suffocating. you needed air.

Matt had always been your air.

you weren’t even sure if he’d be home, but then you saw his silhouette moving behind his bedroom window, and the breath was knocked right out of you as you were flung into the past.

“i can see you when you’re undressing. you know that, right. you need to move to another spot.”

he’d smile that crooked grin of his. “you don’t like seeing me undress?”

“i never said i didn’t. i just don’t like it when you undress in front of the whole damn street.” you’d huff out a breath, tugging at his jean’s belt loops. he’d flush a deep crimson, as he always did whenever you turned his own cheeky flirting against him. you leaned close to his ear, letting your lips barely brush his jaw. “that’s for only me to see.”

he turned, and you locked eyes. without a word, you spun on your heel and marched out of the street.

–

it was almost like you’d coordinated it.

you didn’t know what had caused you to take the detour to your tree. Matt and your tree. the swings hung from the same place they always had, and Matt was seated on one of them, using his feet to rock himself back and forth. he cocked his head when he spotted you, but his once-soft brown eyes were dark–darker than they should have been. it was a sunny day. if you closed your eyes, you could recall the exact shade of his eyes on a sunny day.

you took your seat beside him, and for a moment when neither of you spoke, it almost felt right.

“don’t apologise.” you couldn’t say how you’d known he was going to apologise, but you just knew, because you knew him.

“i’m still going to.” his voice was almost swept away by the wind, and yet you found yourself drawn to it like a moth to flame. “i’ll apologise as many times as i need to.”

“what for?” it was an echo of one of the first things you’d said to him since he’d been back. sorry for what? except this time, you actually meant it. you were curious as to what he thought he needed to be sorry for.

“for letting you down, mostly, i guess. for making the wrong choices every time. for not listening to you when i should have. for hurting you as much as i did–even though i might not have been able to do anything about it.”

despite everything, you found yourself shaking your hand. “we all make bad choices. i know i did. i tried to erase you completely from my life. rebuild a new one–one where you never were.” you shrugged awkwardly, only vaguely remarking you had subconsciously synced your swing’s rocking with his. “that was my big mistake. i should have cherished the memories i did have instead of pushing you away completely.”

his fingers twitched as if they were itching to grab yours. you knew yours were. “i would probably have done the same.” you knew it was true.

it was nice to just enjoy each other’s presence for a while, rocking on your swings and keeping your thoughts to yourself. you slowly let yourself grow used to his presence again, thought the fear–that one day you’d wake up and find him gone again, and that you wouldn’t be able to handle it–remained.

when the sun started to dip behind the houses, and you stood up to leave, he called after you. “y/n?” you turned, shoulders tense. “you’re the only good choice i’ve ever made.”

–

why were you crying? you had no reason to be crying, but before your muddy mind could comprehend what you were doing you’d picked up the phone and dialled Matt’s number with shaky fingers. maybe just hearing his voice would be enough to calm the nerves rolling in painful waves inside you. a mere second after he picked up, Matt said, “i’m on my way.”

you’d crashed into his arms the second he crossed your doorstep, and you cursed yourself for being so weak. but without a moment of hesitation he’d wrapped his arms around you, and he was stroking your back the way he used to do when you’d get upset. you had half a mind to collapse to the floor, but managed to keep that small amount of control to yourself.

“hey, hey, it’s okay,” he mumbled. you drank the words up eagerly, willing them true. “everything’s fine.”

it was. everything was fine. “i don’t ever want to feel this way again. i don’t want to have to be told that you’re gone again only for you to show up years later.” you took a shaky breath; your voice broke. “i don’t want to lose you again.”

he’d gotten taller. and more muscular. you felt them tense beneath your touch. “i’m not going anywhere.”

you looked up, and from his eyes shone nothing but truth. light brown, soft like caramel. the colour of every good thing in this world.

he kissed you, and with every second he held you in his arms you felt yourself learn to breathe again.

#matt holt x reader #matt x reader #matt vld x reader #matt holt voltron #matt holt vld #voltron matt holt #voltron matt x reader #vld matt x reader #vld matt holt #i posted so much today yeet #@aticus youre a bitch #i hope u like

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