#mary is separated from her mother and never sees her again. she dies before she can. of course she would hate anne boleyn

[fideidefenswhore]

@boleynism replied to your post:

It's a great summary, although I'm not sure 'bullying' is the best word choice (...hectoring?); unless, of course we're taking Chapuys at 100% face value (which...off the dome, incorrect report of the name of Anne's first child, incorrect report that Mary was going to be sent to serve Anne as maid in waiting, report that there were no bonfires celebrating Elizabeth's christening was contradicted by two other sources...only the first of which he ever admitted the error, which he would never have gotten away with doing otherwise, as she was a significant child, the second of which he still claimed was true but that Anne had changed her mind and decided to send her to Elizabeth's household instead). And it's the reality of power, really...gaining power, securing power, maintaining power (or, as Thomas has argued here, safety) can be very ugly. These were not Disney princesses we're talking about. But there's a certain Janus face to all this, also: in all likelihood, Anne completely believed that everything she did was justified, because she wanted to use that power for good ("pardon me from your hearts [...] that I have not done all the good that was in my power to do.”  ), for causes she believed in, that's all tied up in that fierce maternal instinct (""A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path.") as well.

[bisexualchaosdemon]

What if Neil was trans and had a baby after Mary died?

I've seen a few atfg fics where Neil has a sibling or kid but all the ones I've read were heavily influenced by Mary's presence. It got me thinking about what it would be like if she wasn't around when the kid came into the picture. I wrote a little prologue, lemme know if it's something you guys might wanna read.

**trigger warning: mentions of SA, forced pregnancy, and traumatic childbirth**

Hope was a dangerous, disquieting thing

🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵Prologue🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

When Neil was fourteen, his father caught up to them in Seattle and he got separated from Mary. Nathan went after Mary and a couple of his men went after Neil. While they were apart, Neil was raped for the first time and Mary was beaten for the last time. Somehow, they both escaped, managing to reunite at one of their emergency rendezvous and take off running.

That's where their luck ran out though because they only made it to California before Mary's injuries finally bested her. In the end, his mother couldn't go on but she made Neil promise to keep running because one of them had to make it. With no other choice, Neil burned her body, buried her ashes on the beach, and did what he had promised.

Then, impossibly, things went from bad to worse — After a month of just sort of drifting in his grief, Neil found out he was pregnant.

He had no way out this one, there was no backdoor to slip through or bus to catch. He couldn't risk someone contacting the police or social services when a fourteen-year-old turned up at a clinic to request an abortion without parental consent. And, even if they weren't incredibly dangerous, any illegal methods for a termination risked Nathan tracking him down. So, with no choice but to keep the pregnancy, he spent the next eight months jumping from place to place, trying to remain out of sight whenever possible. And he hated every minute of it.

He spent the entirety of his pregnancy terrified and alone, and he gave birth alone too. He hadn't been able to see any doctors or go to a hospital for obvious reasons. He tried his best to have a healthy pregnancy but the research he had managed to do on childbirth was extremely limited. He didn't even know what was happening really before he ended up giving birth in a back ally somewhere — fourteen years old and completely alone.

The baby hadn't cried at first and Neil had never been more terrified than he had been in those few seconds. That first cry brought a relief heavy enough to break him completely. His plan the whole time had been to give the baby up, just leave them at a fire station somewhere and pray they'd have a better life than he did. He thought about it a thousand times but every time he looked at his daughter's face, and he just couldn't do it. He couldn't give her up. He didn't want to be alone again.

So he picked himself up, skipped town with his daughter craddled close, and decided to do the one thing he had always wanted; He cut off all of his hair, taped down his chest and started telling people he was a boy. He had always felt like being a girl wasn't right for him but he never dared voice this while on the run with his mother. Without her controling everything though, he was free to do this one thing for himself, and he hoped it might even help him stay hidden. More importantly, it helped him reclaim part of himself he thought he lost after the rape and pregnancy.

The first few years, they moved around a lot because Neil was always worried someone would start to notice the teenager and baby without parents anywhere in sight. However, when his daughter was almost three, they ran a ground in Millport, a dying town where they could squat in an empty house unnoticed. Neil just needed a moment to breathe. So, he got an ID that said he was eighteen which let him go to high school and play Exy without anyone needing to speak to his parents. Then he forged the signatures of their fictional parents to get his daughter enrolled in preschool and after school childcare for the days he had practice. Finally, he got them phones for emergencies and pretended to be his mother any time someone called.

He became Neil and he gifted his daughter his middle name, Anastasia, and on paper they became the Josten siblings.

He knew they would need to pack up and leave soon enough, but he was exhausted and he just wanted Ana to have a semi-normal life for a year. He'd clear out after graduation and figure out where to go from there. But just as their time in Millport is running out, in walks David Wymack with an offer that's too dangerous to trust but too impossible to leave behind...

[stormingfrost]

Wonders of the Invisible World 

Tags: Body horror, major character death, Implied/Referenced child abuse, original characters, pitch/sandy, Katherine/nightlight

summary: 

Through hundreds of years of strange things happening all over the world, finally someone sees. The Bennett family is now at the forefront of every children's tale - except, now, they learn that these tales are not only real, but much, much darker than they first thought.

For @rotg-halloween day twelve: Slither 

Read it on AO3

1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 /13

chapter eleven: Slither

under cut

Being stuck between the tick and the tock wasn’t ideal. One grew impatient. One grew hungry. He could see everything that Ombric, his old friend, could see. He knew Ombric was gone. He knew he was stuck. 

He couldn’t affect anything here. He couldn’t feed.

He slithered across the world, seeing time branch into nothingness. Every decision that would ever be made wrapped around him. 

He observed. 

“Maybe we should try again,” North said. 

“We hadn’t been needed,” Tooth replied. Bunny sat across from her, eyeing Sandy and Pitch. They were together, a perfect balance of fear and dreams. Their hands intertwined. 

“Maybe,” Bunny said. “We haven’t tried being Guardians after the boy came back wrong. Now he’s human. Maybe that is a sign that we have to try again.” 

Katherine sat away from the group, separated by choice. 

“Nothing is going to happen or change if we do,” she muttered. North looked down at her. 

“Nightlight is gone. You must accept that. What you did wasn’t good, but we haven’t been very nice lately.” 

Pitch smiled at Katherine. 

“I know. The pep talks are annoying, aren’t they?” He teased. “You can be good! Ha! I am Fear. You are Stories and Nature. None of us are good. We just are.” 

He moved away from them, going forward into the present. He couldn’t sense any dreams here. He was hungry. 

Jack and Mary stood next to the remains of their home. The snow blew down from the trees, making it look like it was snowing. Jack was shivering slightly.

“What happened to Mother?” Jack asked.

“She died of old age. She never wanted to be immortal. She wanted to see you and Father again.” 

Jack hummed. 

“You look like her. Just a bit.” Mary gave Jack a small smile. 

“Life suits you, Jack. What do you want to do with it?” 

Jack sighed, craning his neck up to stare at the stars. They sparkled. The moon was shining. The sky was navy. 

“I’m not sure. I’ve spent so long being dead that I don’t know anything about living. I can only tell you what I wanted before this. I wanted to be a father. That’s all.” 

Mary took Jack’s hands. 

“That won’t be for another decade or so. What do you want now?” 

Jack smirked mischievously. 

“I want to live. To see everything the world has to offer.” 

Mary grinned. 

“You’re talking to the right witch for that. Come on! Ever want to see Transylvania?” Jack laughed as Mary pulled him away, almost like they were just two kids having an adventure near the pond. 

Lermantoff slithered into town, finding the house of the humans who helped defeat them. His hunger was consuming him now, but he could not feed. 

Joyce held her children close to her, cuddling on the couch as a movie played. Vivian sat on the arm of the couch. Andy splayed across the loveseat. 

“That’s a bit unrealistic,” Jamie said. The movie displayed an inaccurate portrayal of the magical world. 

“Yeah,” Andy said. “The zombies are always pretty sad.” 

“This is really anticlimactic when you’ve faced the end of the world,” Joyce said. 

“Great!” Jamie complained. “Movies are ruined for me.” Vivian chuckled. 

“I think we’re just being a bit too judgy.” 

Joyce turned the movie off just before the characters started to fight the zombies. She sent out a blue wolf around the room. It glittered, sending everyone a sense of calm and contentment. Her locket glowed softly. 

Someone knocked on the back door. 

Vivian held out her axe, before dropping it as she realized it was just Mary and Jack. 

“Hey!” Andy opened the door, ushering them in. 

“I fixed your car for you,” Mary said, nodding towards Joyce. “I also made the cops forget they found your car at all.” Joyce smiled. 

“Thank you.” 

“I’ve been dead for centuries. I want to see the world,” Jack said. “You don’t have to take me in. I’ll live with Mary and Shadowbent. I promise I will visit.” 

“You kinda have to,” Vivian said. “Being our great-something uncle and great-something grandma you’re being forced to spend holidays with us.” 

Jack grinned. Mary shook her head. 

“If you all start calling me Grandma I will put a curse you.” 

“I’m frightened,” Andy deadpanned. Jamie giggled.

They walked outside to where Shadowbent and Sorina were waiting. 

“Ready to go?” Mary asked. Jack nodded. 

“We’re not taking your broom?”

“The wolves are faster. Trust me.” 

Sophie and Jamie hugged Jack. 

“Come back, okay?” Jamie asked. Jack smiled.

“I promise.” 

Goodbyes were said, and they were off. 

Lermantoff slithered back to the sea. It was quiet, as the winter season was in full swing. Hunger was in full force. He bit his tail, feasting on his self. 

The hunger never stopped. 

It would repeat over and over again. Life eternal and death everlasting. There was no fighting it. Change could not be stopped. It was just how it was.

[angeltreasure]

When you worship an idol, you do not worship God, but you worship a rock. When you make for the Prophet Jesus or his mother, the Miss Virgin Mary, or any other person or anything and worship him, then that is not God, and your action is the greatest of sins because you worship other than God, and worship is only for God, God is not An idol, God sees and hears everything, God is not formed in the form of a creature, God is not weak, God is not born, does not die, does not sleep, does not eat, God is one, not two or three, only one, and there is nothing like Him, and He is the Mighty, the Merciful

Muslims: Jesus was a great prophet.

Catholics: Jesus is the second person of the Holy Trinity. He is the Son of God. Jesus is God.

————

Muslims: Acknowledges that Mary is the mother of Jesus with great respect, but not seen as a saint.

Catholics: Mary is not a goddess. She is human and chosen by God. She was born without Original Sin and so filled with the grace of God that she never sinned. She was and is always a virgin. She is the arc of the new covenant, her holy womb being the womb to bare the Son of God Himself, Jesus Christ. She was assumed directly into Heaven because of how holy she is. Hell was never her choice and Purgatory wasn’t needed. She’s our Mother because Jesus gave her to us (and us to her) at His Passion. We don’t worship her but we acknowledge she is the Mother of Jesus and a powerful intercessor.

——-

Muslims: Don’t believe in the Communion of Saints.

Catholics: Believes in the Communion of Saints (no they are not gods and goddesses). Any human who enters Heaven is a saint. We also consider some angels to be saints.

———

Muslims: Worship God alone.

Catholics: Worship God alone.

——-

Muslims: God is omnipresent and omnipotent.

Catholics: God is omnipresent and omnipotent.

———

Muslims: God is God and not formed like a creature.

Catholics: God is God. The Holy Trinity cannot be separated from one another; they existed before the concept of time. The Holy Spirit in one of His forms looks like a dove but the Holy Spirit isn’t a plain dove animal. The Holy Spirit is the expression of love between the Father and the Son.

———

Muslims: God is not weak.

Catholics: God is not weak.

———

Muslims: “God is not born, does not die, does not sleep, does not eat…”

Catholics: I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of Heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son Our Lord, Who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried. He descended into Hell; the third day He rose again from the dead; He ascended into Heaven, and sitteth at the right hand of God, the Father almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body and life everlasting. Amen.

——

Muslims: There is nothing like Him.

Catholics: There is nothing like Him.

——-

Muslims: “He is the Mighty, the Merciful”

Catholics: God IS love and mercy itself.

————————————-

Although we have our differences, I know we can find common ground because we believe in one God and it is God alone we worship. Although we have many differences, we can bring peace to each other in this life. So I will extend my hand to you. May you have a peaceful week and may God bless you.

[possessingtheproperspirit]

Hello!! Time after time for the way you left me — Little Harry comes back from wizard play group and someone nasty told him his mummy used to be married to someone else, not his daddy. He asks James and Lily about it with a frown when they’re home. How do they handle the convo? Do they try to explain about the war, about James going missing, about Lily trying to move on and how mummy wasn’t married but she almost was but she always always loved your dad…? (Getting carried away myself!) Would love to see how you’d write it/imagine it 💓

Hi!! Sorry it's taken me a while, I fell down a hole (went back to work) and have only just managed to raise my head again lol. You really went for the throat with this one and I love it. Hope I've done your vision justice!

Many years down the line from the end of the way you left me...

"Daddy," Harry piped up, a forkful of peas half way to his mouth and a sweet frown on his little face. They were used to the intense discussions that Harry wanted to have at every moment of the day; he was a curious boy, and he didn't mind letting his food go cold if he needed a question answered. "Are you definitely my daddy?"

Lily shot James a glance, eyebrows raised, from across the table. Her husband adjusted his glasses, now frowning too, and leaned forward. "'Course I am," he replied. "What makes you think I might not be?"

Harry swallowed down his peas and replied, "Susie at playgroup said mummy was married to someone else and that meant you're not my daddy."

Lily had to set her mug down, blinking in surprise; James looked over at her, and she held his gaze a moment, letting the pieces slot together in her head. Susie at playground - that must have been Susan Bones. Who was Ed's niece.

Well, it was nice to know that her ex-fiance's family still spoke so well of her.

"I wasn't married to someone else," she told her son gently. "But we were engaged - that means, we were planning to get married." Truthfully, it had been a while since she'd thought about that time: the memories were bittersweet, to say the least, and life was so full now, she was so happy, that there was no need to linger on it. "Daddy was...away, for a long time, and..."

She trailed off. Harry was too young to understand the very complex situation they'd found themselves in, and besides, she didn't want to upset him with the news that they'd all thought James had died. Harry was going through a bit of a separation anxiety phase at the moment as it was; adding in the information that his parents were mortal and could disappear out the front door, never to return, was not going to help matters.

Thank Merlin for James. He reached across to give her hand a squeeze, a soft smile on his face as he looked over at their son. "Lots of people have special people in their lives before they get married," he told Harry. "Mummy had someone called Ed who helped her feel better when she was very sad."

Harry looked at his mother appraisingly, a spark of worry still clear in those vivid green eyes. Their little boy was so thoughtful, so caring: it was times like this that she wanted to gather him up in her arms and never let go. (All the time, really. Sometimes he let her, sometimes he was more interested in playing with his toys.)

"You got happy again, Mummy?" Harry asked earnestly.

"I did," she confirmed. "And Daddy makes me happy, and you do, too."

Harry beamed. "And Uncle Padfoot and Uncle Moony? And Aunty Mary?"

Lily laughed. "Yes, them too."

"Lots of things make Mummy happy now," James added, leaning in a little further and lowering his voice as if about to share a secret. "You know what makes her really happy?"

Harry dropped his fork and leaned in, too, his eyes wide. "What?"

"Stealing chips off little boys' plates," James whispered.

Harry let out a horrified gasp, tugging his plastic Puddlemere United plate - his prized possession - towards himself and away from his parents. "No!"

Lily laughed, standing up - and she couldn't resist ducking down to press a kiss to her son's cheek. "You'd better eat them up quick, then, Harry."

A minute or so of contented munching followed, only interrupted by, "Daddy? What's at the bottom of the sea?"

It seemed like Harry had moved on already.

[meepsthemiqo]

Hi there!

Hi! Hello, I am Midd, better known as meepsmun. Writer for my ffxiv oc, Meeps Ior and her family.

About the Mun

Some things about me before you interact:

I’m 30+, so please, do not interact if you are a minor.

Happily married to Mr meepsmun.

I have often debilitating depression and anxiety.

I’ve had issues in the past interacting with people outside of my blog due to my personality, so interact at your own risk.

On to Meeps...

Some basic information about Meeps:

She is currently 33 years old.

She is 4’9”.

She was born Fae Ior, hence the name of her son being Fae'a Ior.

Her favourite food is fish paste cake. 

Her white highlights are natural.

Despite showing all the signs, she is NOT a Warrior of Light. Her “blessing” is not from Hydaelyn.

She has a golden carbuncle named Vauthry that eats meol kibble.

[A Link to the current list of Ships]

[Random Meeps headcanon #1] [Random Meeps headcanon #2] [Random Meeps headcanon #3] [Random Meeps headcanon #4] [Random Meeps headcanon #5] [Random Meeps headcanon #6] [Random Meeps headcanon #7] [Random Meeps headcanon #8]

Mini fics

[Dawntrail Mini fic - Meeps x Koana] [Endwalker Mini fic - Meeps x Estinien] [Stormblood Mini fic - Asahi]

More Meeps info below~

Relationships

Meeps' Children

She is the mother of two beautiful children: Fae’a (currently 11) and Marie (currently 6). They have different fathers.

Fae'a Ior

Fae'a is Meeps' oldest child. He is currently 13 years old. Fae'a was born before the events of ARR. His father is Elidibus.

Marie Ior

Marie is Meeps' youngest child. She is currently 8 years old. Marie was born post-Dragonsong war. Her father is Charibert.

Past Relationships

Meeps has had two past relationships: Charibert (it’s complicated) and Elidibus (it's extremely complicated). Elidibus is the father of Fae’a, Charibert is the father of Marie.

Charibert

Meeps meets Charibert during A Realm Reborn, when the Ishgardian Inquisition becomes involved in the investigation into heretics at Camp Dragonhead. There is a spark between them, but nothing happens and the two part ways. 

They next meet during Heavensward, when Charibert had become a member of the Heavens’ Ward. The spark is reignited and the two begin an affair. Meeps was very much in love with Charibert at the time and outwardly, Charibert appeared to be the perfect partner. Yet, in the end, it turned out to be a lie. Charibert had been using Meeps as a means to get information on the Scions. Meeps gladly spoke to him, trusting him and seeing it as him taking an interest in herself and her companions. 

By the time the truth was revealed to Meeps, she was already pregnant with Marie. Meeps chose not to tell Charibert of her pregnancy and so he died without knowing he had fathered a child.

Elidibus/Themis

Meeps’ relationship is, simply put, extremely complicated and sadly, one of tragedy. To explain it fully, we have to go back to ancient times, to Amaurot. 

In the world unsundered, Meeps was an ancient by the name of Selene. Selene was the wife of Elidibus. The two were very much in love. When the time came for Elidibus to become the heart of Zodiark, he fused a part of his soul with his beloved Selene, so that they would never be separated.

It is this shard that gives Meeps her “blessing”, which gets her mistaken for a WoL. It is also this shard that allows Elidibus to recognise her. Except Elidibus never sees Meeps as Meeps. He recognises her as his wife, Selene. He is convinced that when the rejoining is complete, she will become the woman he loves once again and remember the life they once had together. Despite this, Meeps has his son, Fae’a, tying the two together even more. 

Following his death, Meeps begins dreaming of her life as Selene, showing her the past life Elidibus desperately wanted her to remember.

[the-lancasters]

The Life and Times of Charlotte Aline Margaret Lancaster nee Nelson, Lady, Crown Princess, Duchess, Queen

AN: This post is a beast and if you have gotten to the end and read the whole thing congratulations and thank you for indulging me in this deep dive into Charlotte as a character. I have been working on this post for a wee while now and it kept growing and growing. She hasn’t shown up much in my story but as I have fleshed out the characters in the background, I grew very fond of her ❤ 

Previous| Beginning  | Next

Transcript under the cut

Charlotte – How did it come to this?

My childhood was a relatively happy one. My brother, sister, and I spent most of our time in the country, sometimes mother would join us but father was often too busy in town and she would be there to support him and host his parties. I didn’t realise at the time that, as the Duke of Northumberland, he was a high ranking member of the aristocracy. All I knew was that he was never there.

Once I came of age, my mother set about preparing me for making my social debut. She impressed upon me again and again how important this was. I had to make the perfect match. As a woman I had limited options outside of marriage. As the eldest daughter of the Duke of Northumberland, they were down to almost zero.

On my first visit to Goldsborough Palace, my future home, I was so nervous and I dearly wished I was back home in the rolling fields of Chatfield Estate. I did come to love the big old building but right then the facade seemed so intimidating and there were so many people jostling to gain favour. This is also when I realised exactly who my father was. We were escorted to a separate room and before I knew it, I was being presented to the King and Queen without the ever-present crowds of courtiers. I met my future husband that day too. Not that I knew anything of my fathers plotting and manoeuvring but after that meeting, I somehow gained the King's approval and my path was set.

The joy I felt on my wedding day was real. It felt like everyone in Illyria had come out to see me marry a Prince. Edward was charming, handsome, and eloquent. Everything someone of my status looked for in a husband. He listened to my thoughts about the books I read and the parties I went to as part of my new role as Crown Princess. While that may seem a low bar now, I remembered how distant my own parents were and this was a revelation. I quickly became pregnant to everyone's joy. While Mary was not the boy everyone was hoping for, I had an easy pregnancy and there was no reason it would not be a boy next time. And they were right, George came along next and the future of the Crown was secure. George was not even a year old when King Edward I died and my Edward became King Edward II. We all thought we would have more time to enjoy our marriage and grow our family, but not even Kings are immune to disease.

I was just 27. It was an adjustment, becoming Queen but it was something that my mother had prepared me for my entire life and it quickly settled into a rhythm. I saw less and less of Edward but he seemed to be growing into his role, from a charming debonair youth to a mature man. Little did I know that he was continuing his youthful pursuits elsewhere. But I carried on in ignorant bliss, going to parties, opening exhibitions and fulfilling my role at state occasions. A few years later, Thomas arrived. He was a gorgeous little boy, always smiling and giggling.

He would run through the halls of the palace with Mary chasing after him, his shrieks of laughter echoing in every corner.   But life had been going too well, and I had become comfortable. While on a State visit to Ochya, we were called home urgently. Thomas had caught the flu and was steadily declining. We barely got there in time to say goodbye. Thomas��� death was the hardest thing I have ever had to endure. The guilt was crushing. I was not there for him when he needed me the most. I ceased all my engagements and barely left my rooms. Edward didn’t understand my withdrawal from public life. He lost himself in his work, upped his engagements, trips, and meetings. He did not darken my bedroom again.

George and Mary gave me a purpose to keep going. I became determined to not let them down as I thought I had let Thomas down. Mary was easy, as the responsible one of my children. She soon made a love match with the Crown Prince of Etrium and moved away to start a new life that would be filled with love, children, and new responsibilities far away from Illyria. George was like his father in many ways, charming and easy-going until he didn’t get his way. I indulged him too much, I realise now. In my attempts to protect him, I didn’t let him learn from his mistakes. I made excuses when his behaviour brought harm to others. At the time I fully believed that my son was different to everyone else's children and that he didn’t deserve the criticism. When Edward died, I was set adrift. Elizabeth was now Queen and while I tried to help guide her, it was no longer my place, it was hers.

 My children no longer needed me, with families of their own to raise. And the Crown that I had given my life to, had passed on

I bought Glamis House with the money left by Edward to try and establish a place that was mine. I had gone from living under my fathers roof to my husbands. Everything that I could ever have wanted or needed was there but it was never truly mine. But Glamis House was different, I paid for it and I set about decorating every room exactly how I wanted to. And every day I felt a little more content. My favourite days were when the grandchildren came to visit me at Glamis. I would get the staff to make up their rooms and hide little presents all around that they could find during their visit.  We would have lunch on the lawn and not care if their outfits were messed up. Things that I cared about once upon a time didn’t seem as important when we were out there. Margaret never wanted to leave after each visit. I still made trips into the city, to see friends, attend important family events but as the years went by, the time between trips became longer and longer. I wasn’t as young as I used to be and the trip took more and more out of me each time.

Margaret was always the first to come and see me in my rooms at the palace, no matter what else she was up to in life. I see so much of my younger self in her. Seeing my first great grandchild christened was something I never thought I would see. The next generation of the Lancaster family is starting, as I, the last of my generation, am beginning my end. In the very end, I had all that I could ask for - my family surrounding me. I hate to see them so sad, especially Margaret but the time has come to be reunited with Thomas. I worry for the future of my family. My one regret is that I could not be there to support them in the coming months But now, I am at peace.

[siriusly-sapphic]

Emmeline headcanons or fav ships?

Oh oh oh! I love her!

So canonically what we know about Emmeline Vance is that she was a part of the order of the phoenix in both wars, she was a part of the group that escorted Harry from Privet Drive in OOTP, and she died in the summer between OOTP and HBP after Snape passed on information to the Death Eaters that led to her murder (described as brutal).

Age wise, house wise, blood-status wise, friend wise, we have no damn clue and it's all up to interpretation.

Now I have headcanons that I tend to use when writing her (like the way she is in my dorcissa fic and this emmary oneshot), and I have some other thoughts that I enjoy thinking about. Generally, I make her Narcissa's age (just like Dorcas), and a Slytherin, because I like playing with her as halfblood witch in the Slytherin girls dorm.

But since we don't know her age (just like Marlene and Dorcas, she could be Regulus' age as easily as she could be Voldemort's age), I also like to imagine her being closer to Minerva and Poppy's or even Dumbledore's or Voldemort's age. An old friend to the older characters we know, a respected witch, someone firmly established in the community before the first war ever breaks out. Someone the younger members of the order of the phoenix can look up to, and someone who maybe even remembers the fight with Grindelwald.

That's not how I tend to write her though, because as much as I like to picture these characters as older than the whole "every order member was a teenager when they joined" thing, it does just make more sense storytelling wise to include more characters around the ages of those we know from canon. So for the sake of my headcanons, she's around the age of Narcissa (who for similar reasons, I tend to put in the same year as the marauders just because it's fun, but for Emmeline's story that really doesn't matter at all. It just matters that she's the same age as Narcissa and Dorcas, as well as Emma Vanity and my OC Elaheh Shafiq.)

Also my thoughts on ships differ a lot and the headcanons vary and I don't wanna make this post too long. My favourite ships for her are Emmeline/Mary, Emmeline/Narcissa, and Emmeline/Hestia/Amelia, so I might make separate posts about those later if anyone's interested but I'm not including too much of any of them in the basic headcanons. There's some emmary in here, but it's not the focus.

So: Emmeline Vance.

Halfblood witch: Halfblood dad and muggleborn mother. Her dad died when she was young and her mother raised her in the muggle world, secretly hoping Emmeline would be a squib. Magic wasn't something Emmeline was excited about, but something she feared recognising in herself.

Intimidated by the thought of going to Hogwarts, even more so when she got sorted into Slytherin. Her mother told her to stay away from purebloods and their antics, and now she found herself surrounded by them.

Her best friend is Elaheh Shafiq, the youngest and most talkative daughter of the Shafiq family. She's pureblood, with three Hufflepuff sisters and a heart of gold that's never read a social cue in her damn life. Emmeline is quiet and attentive, notices everything and says very little. They click immediately.

They share a dorm with Emma Vanity (a halfblood witch who's determined to become famous and marry a pureblood wizard so everyone will forget her bloodstatus) and Dorcas Meadowes (a pureblood witch who's struggling to find a line between appreciating her ancestry and staying away from pureblood fanatics), later joined by trans girl Narcissa Black.

Emmeline gets along with Narcissa much more than she expected to, but it doesn't last long after they get a bit older. They share a relatively close friendship for two years, and then never again.

She intends to stay out of the war because she doesn't want to worry her mum any more, but as they get to the later years of school and she sees more and more cases of murder in the Prophet, and she hears more other students talk about wanting to fight (or, worse and in Slytherin more common too, becoming death eaters), she changes her mind.

Seventh year Emmeline starts preparing for an auror training with all that she has. She ignores most of her (some former) friends, refusing to play nice with anyone in allegiance with future death eaters any longer, and is very very sad that this includes Emma Vanity and Narcissa Black.

As soon as she graduates, she's accepted into an auror's program. Here she becomes friends with Frank Longbottom, Hestia Jones, and is happy to reconnect with slightly older Slytherin Kingsley Shacklebolt.

Through Frank and Kingsley, she joins the order as soon as Moody thinks she's up for it, and she becomes a valuable asset to the fight. She stays to herself, not trying to make too many new friends after her training is done. When everyone starts dying, she's quite grateful for that.

Emmeline finds it incredibly difficult to stop feeling like she's at war even after the first war is over. She becomes a feared and infamous auror, working closely with Moody to round up any escaped death eaters, and she's one of the few people who totally understands his extreme paranoia.

This is what starts and ends her relationship with Mary MacDonald. She meets Mary because she wants to check on fellow surviving order members after the war, and they fall in love through shared trauma and a desire to find something positive in everything they've gone through.

They break up because Mary can't continue to stay up every night wondering if Emmeline's gonna come home from auror's missions alive, and Emmeline can't bring herself to stop fighting because every moment she doesn't spend trying do fix the world feels like a moment she wastes the sacrifices of those who didn't survive the war.

It takes her years to stop fighting. She eventually manages to gain a position high up in the auror's office where she doesn't have to be in the field as much, and she finally gets herself to feel alive even when she's not putting herself in harm's way.

Shortly after that, the second war begins. She's approached to rejoin the order, and Mary MacDonald goes as far as to seek her out to beg her not to, but the decision's been made before the question's officially asked.

Emmeline has complete faith in the order's and Harry's ability to stop Voldemort for real this time, and she's determined to help them in whichever way she can. She starts going through old order member's journals and belongings, those she can manage to retrieve.

She promises herself that after the second war ends, she'll live a quiet life. By then, surely she can say that she's done enough and she can live peacefully, maybe even find a way to reconnect with Mary. Maybe get a hobby. Live in the muggle world for a while, even.

Emmeline never expects that she's going to be betrayed. She's really tried to tone down her mistrust and paranoia towards everyone around her. She doesn't see Snape's betrayal coming.

She gets brutally murdered a year into the second war. The last thing she thinks is that she ought to have listened to her mother (who's still alive) more carefully.

[halt-kun]

Hunter x Hunter Chapter 215 - Last words

BACK to Hunter x Hunter

it's been a while, it's nice to have time to catch up before a chapter comes out but it also doesn't press me to keep up the pace

I've been quite occupied with Baldur's gate 3

Dr Lee must be a badass if Netero considers her the best in medicine. Is she a regular surgeon or a veterinarian ? Probably specialized in magical beasts too if Netero called her specifically

I'm saying "her" because from what I remember from the anime the main doctor was a lady but I may be wrong

DAMN Netero, cutting your hair like that, don't you know a nice hairdresser. Actually he also cut his beard and mustache I think

The french translation really did a : "Kokoro t-shirt - note : Kokoro means heart"

Everything went according to Keikaku

Netero is asking Colt, he already valued his opinion and considers him an ally

I love Colt

BURN

Poor Morel and Knov, they're in way over their head

even if they're probably as skilled or more skilled (considering their age and experience) than PT for example

He doesn't look like you're laughing Netero

So Netero is off to see some old friends

By that he means someone several decades younger than him

We all know he has older friends around

Cool all the annoying people that would have tried to kill them left

The oddballs are always the best characters

Koala = peak chimera ant

Is that Dr Lee ? Because she looks badass

a nice scar on her face, I want to know more

Does she uses nen ?

Sometimes Togashi bothers me because he introduces very cool background characters that we'll never hear of again

I LOVE HER

bring her back later TOGASHI

poor Colt, he is very distraught

Yep, you can't do anything, that's how things are

some things are beyond our control

Morel noticed too, he's very emotionally intelligent

She picked up the signal on her equipment ? Nice

Poor Queen, so delusional

Colt doesn't want to add to her current organs failing one after the other but it's not really a good idea to lie like that. What if she survives

Knuckle is listening intently too

The queen is really all about birthing like most insect queen who don't have any commanding role actually

but I feel bad for her

she really didn't care about anything else

Colt will have to come to the realization she didn't care (as a mother) about him or even about any other ants lower than the King

Poor Colt, it must be so hard to have someone you deeply care about, acknowledge to your face they don't care about you at all

It's weird she only cares about one of her sons

What is Morel pondering ?

About Colt ?

Meryem and Meruemu, each translations is different

french translations tend to stick to the pronunciation in hiragana when in reality the /u/ at the end of japanese words is barely hearable

In french it tends to be /ə/ in a parisian accent (the schwa, some kind of eu in french or huh in english I'd say). It's not that in belgian french or quebec french. In other french accents from France like mine I couldn't find what the central neutral vowel was (I'm not a linguist)

It's the same vowel in English apparently, you end your words with a schwa

Enough random facts

THE LIGHT THAT ILLUMINATES ALL

I wonder if it'll scorch the earth or feed the plants

If his name is actually Maryam (an arabic name) his actual name would be the equivalent of Mary

She died

poor Colt, again

I feel for him

not for the Queen though, I can't see her as just a random animal slave to her instinct

she could have been educated though and maybe choose not to eat a bunch of humans

We finally get a small explanation on why ants can talk

I love how the queens artificial organs make her look like a cyborg

AWWWW a bebe

my baby now

I wonder if the queen was going to birth more soldiers or go directly to making new royal guards

considering the fact it's small it shouldn't have a lot of power

But also, it has an umbilical cord and only the King actually grew up in the Queen's womb, the rest were separated from the Queens quite early on. I bet the eggs were expulsed when they didn't have a full body plan yet

and even less able to cry and breath

So the only explanation is : this is Meruem's twin

it didn't get much from all the humans the Queen ate

I'm tearing up

this panel of Colt is soooo good

They won't Morel

Everyone is crying

Damn you Togashi

the happy family flashbacks get me everytime

The mother is still out there searching for her kids

[killiansprincss]

Feels like Home CS Secret Santa 2022

Happy Holidays @randomartistwhodoesnothing I'm your Captain Swan Secret Santa! It's been great fun these past few weeks, I really hope you enjoy this Modern AU! @cssecretsanta2020

 Also on AO3

Summary:

Emma Swan hated coming home for the holidays from College for three reasons, one being bumping into her ex boyfriend.

When her brother invites Killian over for Christmas Dinner, will old flames reunite or will feelings of hurt and anger over how things ended resurface?

____

Emma Swan hated the holidays and coming home from college for them for 3 reasons:  

Firstly; Growing up in the foster system for the first 13 years of her life she never experienced a Christmas like all the movies, it was either crappy group homes where nobody cared about these kids and how they had no family and nobody to care about them, they didn’t even cook a Turkey. Or the one Christmas she was fostered but they made it so obvious they wanted the money as they made no effort with her and instead smothered their real son with presents galore.  

Secondly: Coming back to Storybrooke, Maine. The only place she considered home was great. But when you’re in college and have no money and get by on coffee and 2 hours of sleep and you see everyone you went to high school with, celebrating their successes wasn't the easiest, especially when Emma was now in her Junior year and still hasn’t figured out her major. 

And Third, and kinda going hand in hand with the second reason: being back in your hometown was the worst when faced with your ex boyfriend. 

Killian motherfucking Jones. 

She would recognise his black leather jacket wearing ass and Jet black hair from a mile away. Still with the same smirk he had after he kissed her for the first time at her 18th birthday.

“Swan. Nice to see a familiar face around.” 

They dated for less than six months before they went separate ways to college but they were actually friends for years. And compared to her last shitty relationship, Killian was actually a really decent boyfriend.

“Jones. Nice to see even the Big Apple pales in comparison to Grannys.” She’d seen him around every break, but it always felt awkward between them.

“Big cities aren’t all they’re cracked out to be, you're still in Boston I assume?”

“Best part of telling people around here that I go to college in Boston is when they assume I go to Harvard, I don’t correct them.” 

This emits a smile from Killian. “Glad to see college hasn’t changed you of all people. See you around Swan.” 

——-----

One of the few things Emma did like about coming home was seeing her family. 

Well granted now that her foster mother died last spring, she was left with just her big brother David. He was a couple years older than her and never went to college so throughout Emma’s high school years he was always around, she would come to him for advice and he would help her anytime she got in trouble. He even drove a eight hour round trip when Emma broke up with her ex-boyfriend a few months back and couldn’t face being in her apartment alone. And even though he had a wife and a baby on the way, he never made Emma feel any less loved.

“Guess who I saw lurking by the docks earlier?” Her brother asks. They’re sitting down for dinner, Emma sitting opposite David and his very pregnant wife Mary Margaret. Mary Margaret who had been David’s girlfriend ever since she came into this family, and was like a big sister, she was amazing and couldn’t think of anyone better for her brother.

“Leroy trying to escape getting caught leaving the White Rabbit drunk and disorderly again?” Her brother was the sheriff of the town, he didn’t go to college and had been interning since he was 17 so when the last sheriff retired, David was the obvious choice to take over. Although his job did mainly consist of rallying the town drunks when he wasn’t up to his eyeballs in paperwork.

David just chuckles, “no actually not today. Killian.”

Emma inwardly groans. Whilst David was never his biggest fan before they were together, he eventually grew to like him and since breaking up David always wants to know if there is a chance they will get back together. “Yeah I saw him coming out of Granny’s on my walk over here.” 

“Did you notice his missing hand?” Mary Margaret asks and Emma snorts,

“Is that a euphemism or something?”

Her sister in law shakes her head, “don’t you remember the crash that he and his brother got into last year?” 

“Shit, I forgot. Did he ever have a funeral? I don’t remember getting an invite.” Despite their breakup, there wasn’t any bad blood really, she knew Liam pretty well and she would have liked to be there.

Mary Margaret just shakes her head, “What I heard is it was a private burial, I’m not even sure his father was there.” 

Emma rolls her eyes at the mention of Killian's father, Emma met him maybe twice in the time she was in high school. One day he just got up and left because of a new girlfriend and left Liam and Killian alone. 

“I didn’t know he lost his hand, I heard he was in hospital for a while but I assumed it was all minor. I should go see him.”

“You may get the opportunity sooner than you think.” David mumbles in between the sips of his wine.

Emma knew what that meant and she groaned, “please tell me you didn’t.”

“He’s coming to dinner for Christmas. He doesn’t have any family left, you know better than anyone how that feels.” It wasn’t meant in a cruel way, and Emma knew he was right, she knew what it was like to have nobody and he didn’t deserve to feel that way. 

_______

The next day Emma sees Killian in town and doesn’t run in the other direction. Baby steps. 

“Swan.” It’s as if his face lights up when he sees Emma, which Emma hates. They had been broken up for over 3 years, she did not want to get back together. 

Still, she offers him a genuine smile. “Hey,” but this time her eyes linger to his hand, or rather, lack of.

“It’s okay, you can ask, it’s just a prosthetic, not a Hook.” 

“I should’ve said something last night, I feel awful about it. I’m so sorry.” She had no excuse for forgetting that his brother was killed.

“Don’t be sorry Swan, it’s not your fault. We were on our way home from a concert, Liam dragged me along. I didn't really know the band. It was raining pretty bad and the roads were slippery and next thing a car comes out of nowhere and hits us at speed flipping the car over and over. I woke up in hospital a few days later to the news that Liam didn’t make it, and as for my hand, they said the bone was sticking out so they had no choice but to amputate.” He explains taking his left glove off to reveal his prosthetic hand. 

Emma isn’t at all sure what to say, what do you say to the man who loved you and you were too much of a coward to say it back, and so break up with him instead. They were young and stupid and that didn’t excuse it, she couldn't help but wonder if they stayed together would any of this have happened. “I’m glad you’re coming to dinner, it’ll be nice to catch up.” She settled on, and it was true, she did want to catch up and see how he was doing, just hopefully without causing any feelings to resurface.

Over the next few days Emma will see Killian in the street, the store or at Granny’s and it felt like High School again. Suddenly she felt like she was 17 and was transported back to walking the halls of Storybrooke High with a smile on her face whenever she saw Killian. They were best friends, she was his biggest supporter aside from Liam, cheering at his football games and he was there to tutor her when she was failing Math. One look at each other would tell them everything they were thinking.

___

Yes they were best friends, but that didn’t stop Killian from flirting with her. And she never shot him down, never let on it made her uncomfortable because it didn’t, she enjoyed it. She would roll her eyes at him calling her “princess” or “love”, but she enjoyed the way it made her feel. At the time she thought it was because it made her feel special, an unloved orphan getting attention. It was stupid because she didn’t exactly realise until her 18th birthday party when they both had a little too much alcohol that Killian wasn’t just flirting with her for fun, he was flirting with her in the hopes that one day she may flirt back.  

It's not that there was anything wrong with Killian. He was insanely attractive, dark hair, light eyes and a british accent that was fucking hot. Emma would be lying if between the ages of 15 and 17 she hadn’t thought about kissing him at least once, and had woken up in a cold sweat from a very strange sort of dream about the two of them. But he was her best friend, and it would be weird to go from being friends to suddenly being more than that. 

“You would still be friends, just friends that kiss and have sex.” Was Ruby’s advice, which didn’t make her feel any better, that would surely just make things even weirder. What if they tried dating and it was horrible and they have an awful fight and things are never the same again. Which ironically is kind of what happened in the end, things got weird and they aren’t exactly friends anymore.  

The night of October 23rd. The night that changed everything. Emma's 18th birthday party. Ruth and David were away for the weekend so she had the house to herself with all the alcohol David conveniently “left behind” and everyone from school was invited. The house was not in the best shape when they returned  but that is a story for another day. Killian wasn’t there to help set up as he had practise for the upcoming game so he came when it was in full swing and the beer was flowing. Emma was not exactly sure how many beers she had by the time he arrived, letterman jacket in place of leather. Fuck it was hot. 

“Killian!” She runs over and hugs him as soon as she sees him.  

He hugs her back, and lingers for maybe a little too long, “Happy Birthday Swan.” 

Emma hands him a cup filled with whatever mixed beer and vodka concoction she had been drinking and leads him to the makeshift dance floor in the living room. “I was worried you weren’t going to make it.” 

“It’s your birthday Swan, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”  

The two dance together for a while, beer after beer and Killian gets a little more flirty, and Emma just smiles and lets him flirt. 

It's past midnight and they’re still dancing together, but Killian takes her hand and leads her outside to the swinging bench on the porch, claiming he had something important to say.  

“I need to be honest with you Swan.”  

“What’s going on?” Emma asks, brows furrowed in confusion. 

”Emma, I-” Killian hesitates, looking to the door and back to Emma, afraid someone would walk out and ruin his only chance.  

The use of her first name and not her last baffles Emma, still unsure where this conversation was going. 

Instead of saying words, Killian grabs Emma’s face and kisses her. It feels strange at first, because it’s Killian, her best friend, but then it starts to feel right. It feels safe and he feels like home.  

“What was that?” She asks when they eventually pull away. 

“Something I have wanted to do for a while.” He admits with a smirk, gone was the shy facade he had before and was now more confident and slightly cocky.  

Emma kisses him again, just to make sure it was not a strange fluke and glitch that it felt good to be making out with her best friend, and turns out it felt even better the next time. Sure his lips tasted mostly of beer, but she couldn’t think of a single reason why she shouldn’t be doing this.” 

One thing leads to another and the next morning Emma wakes up with the worst hangover, and Killian in the bed next to her. Things were strange but over the next few months the two started officially dating and it felt totally normal, it was exactly like Ruby said, still best friends that just occasionally have sex. She had never felt so safe and comfortable, he felt like home.  

But when Graduation came around and College applications and scholarships came into play and ruined everything. They started arguing because Killian got a full ride to NYU and Emma hadn’t applied to any colleges in New York, she eventually got a scholarship to a small university in Boston, 4 hours away.  

“I don’t want to have a long distance relationship. How do we go from seeing each other every day to maybe once a month if we’re lucky?” Killian asks, he was in love with Emma and hated the thought of them being apart. 

“Then let’s just break up.” Emma tells him, coming out more blunt than intended, seeing the clear hurt on her boyfriend's face. “I just mean, let’s be friends whilst in college, whatever happens between us will only end badly if we stay together. Then when college is over, we can see if feelings and shit between us are still there. 

And that’s what happened, well to an extent. They went their separate ways, and the first few weeks would call and text all the time but as both had papers to write and tests to take, contact became less and less frequent and the first summer break they barely saw one another.

Emma did regret not keeping in touch with Killian and touching base more often, but it was inevitable, he was getting closer and closer and the walls Emma had spent years building were slowly crumbling and she hated it. David was the only person who could see past her walls and that took a while but he was her brother and it was different. Killain was tricky, she wanted to let him in but was so afraid of getting hurt. 

So sitting beside him on Christmas Day was a strange feeling. She was getting strong deja vu from the many family dinners he attended when they were dating. And clearly so was her brother who kept looking between the two of them and then back at his wife with a wide grin on his face.

“This is really nice of you to invite me Dave, I appreciate it.” Ever the gentleman with her family, not much has changed.

“It’s the least we could do, you were practically family once.” David smiles despite the glare his sister gives him across the table. “So what are your plans for after college, have you decided on a major?”

“I decided to major in Math actually, it always came naturally to me and it’s a good major that I think I’ll need for the Navy.” He tells them, taking an awkward sip from his beer, a conversation that was not going to go well.

“The Navy?” Emma almost doesn’t pick up on that last part, her mind flashed back to one of many study dates with Killian who was always better at Math than she was, a study date that started off with genuine studying and ended up with the two making out for hours. 

Killian doesn’t make eye contact, just simply takes another sip of his drink and continues. “That’s why I came back here, I have a few things of Liams to sort out, then I’m selling the house and moving back home where I’ll enlist in the British Royal Navy. I can graduate early if I do a few credits over the next few months.”

Home. Where he was born, a place Emma knew he hadn’t visited since he left when he was 7. This place had been his home for over a decade and suddenly it's not anymore. Bullshit. “Excuse me, I need some air.” She says getting up from the table, plate of food barely touched and practically runs from the room. 

“I should follow her, I’m sorry.” Killian says to David and Mary Margaret suddenly feeling awkward.

He finds Emma sitting outside on the porch swing and he debates whether or not to sit beside her, unsure if it would make things more awkward, eventually deciding to just stand beside it. “Swan, can we talk?”

Arms crossed, and not looking at him she tells him simply, “I don’t want to talk. There’s nothing to talk about.” It was immature but she didn’t care.

“Swan, I don’t get it.” He finally sits next to her on the swing. “You’ve barely spoken to me these past few years since we broke up, I assumed you’d be happy to see me go.” 

“Why are you leaving?” Emma simply ignores his comments, true as they were.

“There’s nothing here for me.” He sighs, not wanting to argue right now. “I have nothing left here, no family, no friends, nothing, I may as well start fresh.”

“You don’t have anyone? What am I then?” She asks, a little angry that despite everything that had happened, he didn’t see her as anything to him anymore.

Killian just scoffs, “You tell me Swan. What are we? Because if we’re being honest I have no clue. All I  know is I loved you and  you broke my fucking heart and then everything in my life goes to shit.” He wasn’t blaming her for anything that happened, but it hurt that when everything went to shit he didn’t have his best friend beside him.

“Are you blaming me for your brother's death right now?” It was a low blow, but in the heat of the moment she didn’t care.

“Of course not. But having you by my side would have made things a hell of a lot easier. All that bullshit about how we’ll stay friends and then whenever we’re back in the same town it's as if you make an excuse to avoid me. I don’t want a fucking pity party right now. I need to be alone.”

And with that, Emma is left on the porch swing by herself not knowing what to do. For the first time in years, she allows herself to cry. Actual tears spring from her eyes, wetting her face. Was she really such a horrible person? Is that what everyone thought of her? 

Emma had walls. Built up from half her life spent as an orphan, tossed about by different families and never really feeling loved. So she built walls over the years that only grew stronger as someone tried to chip away at them. David blasted a hole and forced himself in, which is exactly what Emma needed, he was family. But Killian.

Killian was different. He didn’t try to chip away at her walls, the wall chipped by itself when she was around him. When he kissed her for the very first time, it was like a huge chunk had just fallen, and she was becoming a lot more vulnerable. It was the first time it had happened. It was scary. She felt safe, but she was so afraid of being open that if something happened, it would hurt more than anything else.”

___

The next few days, Emma barely leaves the house. She has a paper to finish off which keeps her mind occupied, occupied away from Killian. She can’t face him again. But she equally doesn’t want to lose him forever. 

“His flight leaves tonight.” David lingers by her door, “thought you deserve to know.”

“Thanks, but I don’t think he wants to see me ever again.” 

David comes away from the door and on the side of the bed where his sister was. “I don’t believe that for a second.”

Tears begin to slowly form in her eyes “You didn’t hear our argument. Everything he said about me was true. I broke his heart and I didn’t even realise, I’m no better than Neal.”

David wraps his arm around his little sister, “never compare yourself to that dichead. You broke up because you didn’t want to go through an even messier breakup six months later after failing at a long distance relationship. Your walls were up, and I know that, but I don’t think he knows that.”

“You think he’ll listen to me?”

David just shrugs ‘Only one way to find out. Go, before it's too late.”

And so Emma takes off for Killians, honestly not knowing what to say or how. When she gets outside his house, going over and over what she was going to say. When the door doesn’t open, she knocks again. And again. “Fuck sake Killian, where are you?” Looking through the window to see if she could spot him ignoring her, she remembers behind the house is a path leading right to the docks. And if he wasn’t home, there was a pretty high chance he was by the docks.

She climbs over the gate, something she used to do a lot when she was in high school, and follows the path, And it doesn’t take long to spot dark hair clad in leather sitting on the edge of the dock, looking into space. She approaches slowly, and slots herself beside him. “Hi.”

He glances a look at her, debating whether to get up or stay. “Swan.” He finally settles on, and stays put.

“I came to explain myself, to tell you that I-” She begins before getting cut off,

“-If it’s an apology you’re here to give, I don’t want to hear it.” 

“Not an apology, Just, an explanation. You deserve to know why I acted the way I did and why I said what I did.”

“Go on then.” he gestures, feigning little interest.

Emma takes a deep breath. “You know I grew up in the foster system, and I was thrown in and out of different foster homes up until I moved here. In those years I experienced a lot of hurt, especially when I got my hopes up of a foster family liking me and adopting me, and it fucking hurt like hell when they threw me back in the system. I built walls up, to guard myself and not let myself feel that hurt, and I wouldn’t let anyone in, if they tried I would push away. David and Ruth punched a hole in that wall and filled it with love, but they’re the only exception.” She manages to smile through the tears beginning to form. “You were always there though, trying to get in and I wouldn’t let you. I think I loved you since you smiled at me that first day in class and helped me find my classes for the day, but I didn’t realise until it was too late. I should have let you in, you wouldn’t hurt me. I know that now, but I didn’t at the time. I felt so safe around you, it was me and you against the world and when I realised I was falling in love, I got scared, and we were moving 6 hours away from each other and I got scared as I was feeling all these things and I thought what if he finds someone better and I feel like I did when I was 7 years old again, so I thought breaking up would help me but I was selfish as I didn’t think how that would affect you. Then whenever we were back in the same place, I didn’t know how to act, my walls were back up and I shut you out. I made terrible mistakes, and I understand if you never forgive me, but you deserve to know the truth.”

When he doesn’t say anything, she simply gets up and walks away. It was out there and at least she could 

“Emma, wait.” She feels her arm grabbed and looks to see Killian, no words forming but its as if he's asking her to stay.

“You deserve to know the truth before you leave. If you never want to see me again then I get it.”

“You loved me back then?” He asks, afraid to know the answer, he had told her a few times that he loved her, she never said it back though, he assumed she just needed time and he was willing to give her that, but as time went on and then the break up happened, he thought maybe she doesn’t actually love him.

“How could I not love you Killian?” She half laughs, half cries. “You were everything to me, and I know that life was pretty good when you were around, the last few years haven’t felt the same.” She had only dated one guy since Killian, and he shattered her heart as soon as she was opening up to him, and she never felt the way with him as she did when she was with Killian. 

“And, do you love me now?” It was a risky question, and one that left Killian pretty bare, but he had to know.

Fighting the urge to deny it, she couldn't. “I think I never stopped loving you, and I know I never told you back then and looking back-”

She's cut off by Killian grabbing her face, similar to all those years ago and capturing her lips in a kiss. She was an idiot for ever letting him go, and she knew at that moment, she would never let him go.

“Is this a reason enough to stay?” Emma asks.

Killlain just nods, “You can’t get rid of me now Swan.” And he kisses her, putting all the longing from the past few years into it, she tasted the exact same.

She felt like home.

[thunyielding]

the unyieldling bodement , princess elizabeth of england , daughter of anne boleyn

penned by velvet. for bloodydayshq

BULLETPOINTS: 

name: elizabeth tudor age/dob: twenty five / 5th may 1534 status/rank: princess of england country of origin: england place of birth: the palace of placentia, england birth order: she is her father’s fourth child, her mother’s second - her brother edward being only a few months younger than her mother & father: queen anne boleyn & king henry tudor viii ✟ siblings: duke henry fitzroy of richmond ✟ (illegitimate), queen mary of spain, king william iii of england, edward seymour (illegitimate, unknown) sexuality: bisexual horoscope: taurus  virtues: earnest, alleviating, enlightened vices: opinionated, impulsive, domineering marital status: n/a issue: n/a alliance(s): king william iii, the reformation, the boleyn family adversaries: the seymour family, strict anti-reformist courtiers, spain

TIMELINE:

1534 — Born in Palace of Placentia to Anne Boleyn, named after her grandmothers Elizabeth of York & Lady Elizabeth Howard, her godparents were Thomas Cranmer, Henry Courtenay, Elizabeth Strafford & Margaret Wotton 1536 — Moved to Hatfield House for her safety & education after the death of Katherine of Aragon, her mother suffers a stillborn son and Jane Seymour gives birth to a son, Edward 1537 — Edward, Thomas & Jane Seymour are beheaded to secure the rumours around William & Elizabeth’s legitimacy 1538 — Mary Tudor returns to court and marries Philip of Spain, leaving England 1439 — Her first summer is spent at Hever Castle 1545 — A warrant for the arrest of Anne Boleyn is signed, but her death is only just dodged. Elizabeth remains at Hatfield House, but by the end of the year begins to travel to Greenwich Palace and Hampton Court on occasion to see her parents 1557 — King Henry VIII dies, followed by William (her older brother) as the next King of England, Elizabeth moves to court to join her brother’s coronation and present herself as no longer daughter but sister 1559 — Anne Boleyn marries Thomas Wyatt, Elizabeth joins court again to attend the wedding

BIOGRAPHY:

The chroniclers of Henry’s Tudor Court would describe the birth of Elizabeth Tudor for years to come - mostly, her beginning was an enigma; a mythology of its own. Seymour Loyalists would whisper that she had been born from the low-hanging fruit of the Percy household due to her mother’s swindling ways. Others would declare that she had been conceived well before the private marriage between the King and his adored subject, Anne Boleyn. Others, coated in sugar by the royal household, would bear the new Princess as a holy comet sent to signal a new dawn and age upon the English royal throne. 

But beneath each and every whisper comes a slither of truth. She had arrived fighting, her lungs heavy with breath as she took her first screams. Coated in her mother’s blood with the feral instinct of Tudor burning within her eyes, Elizabeth was heralded as the King’s legitimate and most beloved daughter - and in time, as Henry Tudor would insist, a son would follow. 

Separated soon after to be fed by a wet nurse, Elizabeth barely knew her parents as a bairn. Surely, she was visited now and again but to an infant they were but strangers who’d sometimes bring new toys or would influence her household to bow and curtsey with deep admiration. No, she didn’t know them as any other normal child would’ve - but then, Elizabeth wasn’t normal. She never would be. With fire shimmering atop her crown, she was prepared to enlist herself into a lifetime offered for England’s future. As her parents brought forth a new playmate, Elizabeth was taught to give way and stand aside for the baby who was now heralded as the one and true heir of the English Kingdom that had once been ruled by giants - descendents of Troy, or so her nanny would whisper. 

As a girl, Elizabeth grew fiery. In some other lifetime where she had lost a mother and her gilded title, she would’ve been forced to become modest and coy - her own father would’ve named Elizabeth as a bastard after all, tarnishing her to become something quite hidden within the shadows till the ever-loving touch of a stepmother who thought each of Henry Tudor’s children were deserving of a place in their father’s heart. But in this timeline? She had been bolstered by her blossoming relationship with her mother and father, often claimed as Princess of Hearts and future Queen of some far away land (even if Mary had been promised to the King of Spain, it did not mean that Elizabeth would not carry a crown - her governess would insist). She prepared with eagerness, studying attentively - learning foreign tongues and histories, indulging herself in horse riding, poetry and philosophy. 

Though celebrated as a daughter of England, Elizabeth was kept from the haunted gloom of court and instead was held within Hatfield House, where she grew from girl to woman - flourishing in her father’s colours as she took to dancing at balls and hosting elaborate feast days and plays. Styled as the Golden Princess, she would cast a wide net to entertain friends and courtiers, often mistaking true friendship and confidants with people who’d whisper behind sugared palms - this would ultimately lead to another sort of mythology to cloud Elizabeth’s public persona. The forever growing Seymour Loyalists and Anne Boleyn’s enemies would often say that her parties grew thick with the devil’s pleasure - that she bore a witch’s mark upon her navel and danced with unmarried men without a chaperone present. Others would say that her entertainment was heavenly, marked with laughter and prayer. Some wouldn’t care to repeat what they saw or heard. Certainly, the truth cannot be known, but Elizabeth’s reputation was soon taken over by the death of her larger than life father, the King. 

Henry Tudor died by a wishbone - choking till his skin turned purple, grey then a bloated whitish-yellow. Elizabeth, who had been walking the gardens before retiring to her chambers, was alerted by a messenger who had been sent by her mother and brother - or should that be mended to read, King William III. No longer a daughter, but presently a sister, Elizabeth moved from Hatfield to London for both the coronation and to reinstate herself as a woman. Hands clasped, she swore to protect her brother and agreed (hesitantly) to marry if such a union would strengthen William’s reign. Now a sister to the King, and the prize pawn to be sold at market, Elizabeth strains against the rules set upon her - and burns with the Boleyn might that nearly every Englishman has grown to fear. 

Now at court, her toes inching closer to the doomed centre of the Tudor court, Elizabeth must protect herself and her family - what with the ghost of war growing louder with each day that passes. No longer a girl of soft fat and small curled fists, Elizabeth’s reputation is at stake. A maiden of pure white linen and an overflowing cup, the Princess bides her time and holds back any type of suitor in the hope to remain a feared Tudor.

[steele-soulmate]

Tattooed Wings, CHAPTER 533, Peter Steele & OFC, Soulmate AU

SUMMARY: Mary Claire Bradley meets her soulmate- literally- the famous Peter Steele of metal group Type O Negative. But will obstacles including trauma, stalkers, and toxic family members get in the way of their life?

WARNING: mentions of child rape (nothing graphic) PTSD, milk kink, soft smut, grinding, assault, fingering, hand jobs, blow jobs, 69, P in V sex, blood, noncon rape, violence, death, vandalism, graffiti, attempted kidnapping, break-ins, wild animal attacks, terrorist attack (sabotage) consensual impregnation, bareback, impregnation kink, creampies, terrorist attacks (shootings) hit and run pedestrian accident, precipitous labor, neonatal death, abandoned baby

WORDS: 1186

“… And over here we have a private room, which you will be put into following your C-section to recover.”

I hummed as Elizabeth pushed me in my wheelchair. I hold holding onto Elle as the family kept up easy pace around the nurse conducting the tour of Saint Mary’s Maternity Hospital for Expectant Mothers. Peter had offered to carry me, making the surrounding staff visibly swoon at how doting he was being towards me. I had told him that I didn’t mind riding in a wheelchair.

“Besides, I’d rather not quirk your leg,” I explained as he took to a knee to press a whiskery kiss to my temple.

“I love you, my sweetheart,” he purred possessively before standing up to his full height and endcapping our party.

Little girl and Baby Tommy toddled on either side of me, the two babies holding onto the extra-long neck strings of my hoodie as not to become separated from us. Both were holding onto their little dollie friends as they went about doing their baby business, babbling softly and pattering along quietly.

“… and here we have the floor’s nurses station. Oh do remind me if your kids will be playing a role in bringing the Ratajczyk triplets into the world?”

“Last time I helped mommy give birth, Baby Violet Marie died,” Elizabeth muttered darkly.

“Listen to me now Elizabeth,” I ordered her, the party coming to a abrupt stop right in the middle of the hallway, me pulling my daughter to stand right in front of me, where I brought her in for a tender hug. “Baby Violet Marie’s death was not your fault. It was never your fault, and it will never be your fault. Do you understand me?”

Elizabeth looked at me with teary eyes, and I knew just what she needed.

“Do you need a nice, long cry?” I asked her, pulling her in all the more tighter. “Go ahead and cry. You’re safe now.”

I made shushing noises and rubbed at her back as Elizabeth became emotionally vulnerable yet again, something that’s been happening more and more as of lately, I couldn’t help but notice. The only thing that Peter and I could do was reassure her and just let her come in for cuddles.

“Have you been talking to Charlie?” I asked her in a quiet voice as Peter joined us, keeling next to us and wrapping his muscular arms tightly around us both. “Elizabeth, would you like to me schedule you to see her for two hours at a time instead of one hour at a time?”

Elizabeth couldn’t find her breath to respond, only having enough energy to release a choked cry right before retucking her face into my neck.

“Don’t cry Lizz Lizz!” little girl begged from her spot hugging her big sister’s legs. “Don’t cry! Need kissies?”

“Uppie uppie uppie!” Baby Tommy demanded, bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet as he ordered to be picked up. Katie picked him up, earning her a happy little cheer. “Yay yay! Tank ou, Kate Kate!” He then grabbed ahold of his big sister’s face and began to pepper her tear streaked face with loud MWAH MWAH MWAHs.

“Mommy, why don’t you and daddy continue on with the tour?” Katie suggested. “I can take Lizz Lizz and Baby Tommy and little girl and Isabelle and go find somewhere to go and sit. Does that sound good?”

“Are you sure, mo stór?” I hummed softly, hating seeing my daughter in clear distress.

“We can have a tea party!” she suggested venomously, grabbing Elle and Jing from me before guiding everyone off.

“I like the way you parent.”

“Well, I don’t know about Peter, but I do like parenting them!” I chuckled as the nurse took it upon herself to push me, Peter and Baby Eve quickly falling into place besides me. “They are all such easy kids!”

“I bet! I follow Elizabeth on Instagram, I really like the shorts that she started to release where she covers requested songs!”

“Yeah, well she’s a talented musician,” Peter chuckled. “Katie plays the piano also, and we’re also anticipating the babies picking up musical instruments in the future.”

“What do you see the babies as playing?”

“Well, Baby Tommy will probably follow in his daddy’s footsteps and take up the cello, and little girl will probably take up the drums or the guitar,” I started as we were wheeled past a nursery with a window that showcased little pink faced babies bundled up snuggly tightly in blankies and corralled in plain bassinets. “It’s too soon to diagnose Baby Eve with a musical instrument though.”

“Ah, okay. Up next we have our cafeteria, Saint Mary’s hospital food is much better than your standard hospital’s food! I must recommend the spaghetti and meatballs- so much yum!”

“My sister will still bring me food to eat.” I blanched at the idea of eating grade school issued mystery meat. “Like no offence, but I once got food poisoning from eating hospital food.”

“Why were you in the hospital, sweetheart?” my husband asked me, wrinkling his nose.

“Oh, I had a really bad head cold, and mom was out of town for something,” I recalled in a bland voice. “Daddy overreacted- as per usual- since it was flu season, and so I was kept for an hour while testing was done on me. Near the end, I was offered a cup of chocolate pudding, which led to the food poisoning.”

“Bleh,” shuddered Peter theatrically, bouncing Baby Eve on his shoulder. “Sounds awful.”

“Oh you have no idea, my love,” I grumbled. “Fluids were coming out both ends for nine solid straight days.”

The nurse coughed awkwardly.

“Might I draw your attention back to our…”

Mo stór, my dear, Irish Gaelic 

TAGLISTS ARE OPEN/ ASK BOX IS OPEN/ REQUESTS ARE OPEN/ PLOT BUNNIES ARE WELCOMED

If you liked this, then please consider buying me a coffee HERE It only costs $3!!!

PETER STEELE TAGLIST

@rock-a-noodle

@ch3rry-c01a

[beech-20]

I am Gilberte daughter of Denise N. and Emile E. West Indian born March 04, 1964 in Guadeloupe we were 11 children including the eldest Marie Alice my half sister who lived with my grandmother and not with us in Pointe à Pitre who was born from a first union between my mother Denise N. and a gentleman Guy C. (not recognized by his father Very frequent at that time)

So I start with the elders so Marie Alice, Evert, Ursule, Mérid, Dany, Dutheil, Marie line, Guy, Gilberte, Sydney and Jean Pierre.

I'll tell my story a bit...

Granddaughter of Stéphanie N. and a certain Servin F. my grandmother Man Fanny is the daughter of René M. my great grandfather who came directly from India and of Maman Alice my great grandmother according to my memory and what remains to me I wanted to share this true story with my children Marvin G. my eldest son from my union with Joël G. West Indian, my second Mounina B. and my last Ethan B. from my union with Senegalese Farba B.

Stephanie my grandmother did not have a great life according to her.

It was a very difficult life because of the war (Temps Sorin) having had children from several unions because at the time it was poverty she got pregnant she gave birth and to feed her child she met another person and she became pregnant again her child was born andso on...children with several different fathers

Simon my mother Denise died at 40 years old I was 6 years old, my aunt Sonia (unknown she died bb and my uncle Victor died bb also it is common at the time)

and my uncle Robert they were from the same father, my uncle Donard L.

his father was Ti fre L., my uncle Jules (I never knew) he was adorable and finally the last uncle Paul N. his father (unknown)

my Uncle Robert we called him Pa Robait this uncle took care of us like his own children because my father did not want to assume his role of father completely I think they had too many children our parents some of my brothers and sisters had stayed with my father in Pointe aclown after the death of my mother Denise and us the little ones and my big sister Dany, Sydney, Jean Pierre and I lived with Grandmother Fanny in Bouillante.

I just wanted to clarify before the death of my mom Denise in Pointe à pitre at our house at home there was never a happy life filled with happiness, first my father Painter in House, did not really want to work for a boss with each hiring he ended up being firedbecause he hit his employer

Example one day bb I witnessed a scene at home you see some things still remain fresh in my memory, because violence always marks a human being especially a child, I remember my father came home very angry in saying that white his boss had himfired and he had hit him, my mum in a very soft voice asks him the reason, he tells her and he starts to hit her, hit very hard on the big fridge the hits were falling on my mum and still resonating in my head , she explains to him how we are going to do with our childrenEmily? (in Creole)

I also wanted to add because of my father my mother had friends, merchants at the market after the end of the market they would meet her to come and pick up the rest that she had not sold otherwise in the evening we would do the tour of the market with mum to pick updamaged things to eat.

This poor sucker was blowing off steam on my mom and already at the time bb I was defending my mother I tried several times to separate them a little bitch like I was, he took advantage of this cowardly man to hit and bang when my big boys brothers weren't there they were at school.

Also the one who protected our mother the most was my older big brother Evert E (who passed away in 2018) he was getting a lot of beatings instead of my mother Denise, my mother was telling my father that he was going to kill his child, every night my big brother came home very lateEvert E. to avoid my father, but my father waited until my big brother was well in his bed to jump on him and then, like a Devil, he beat him up.

Ursule my older sister (who passed away in 2008), and my brother Merid came to separate them.

Him my father did not have a good story because his father Andre P. did not recognize him but my father never told us anything about his story he never spoke I sometimes went to visit my paternal grandfather Andre P. When I was still a child in Guadeloupe.

He welcomed us well he was breeding birds (pigeons) he was very kind to his grandchildren.

I specify that after the death of my father he had a lot of land in the West Indies

but none of us are heirs, for he preferred to leave to the state.

and also my brother Dutheil protected my mother and defended her but much later when he was a little older (after my mother's death he avenged it he hit my father in turn explaining his childhood to him all that he had put our mother through and he had to pay my fatherhad had an accident...and Dutheil was merciless...it's a bit hard to tell...in short, the only person who took pity was my sister Marie-line)

Pa Robait passed away in 2021, I knew him well, because he raised us with Grandma

Man fanny married very late with a gentleman Daniel P. I did not know this gentleman she was a widow.

I remember that my grandmother was very funny sometimes after she had been lying in her bed for 7 years because she had been sick, she had been announced her death, a priest had come to give her her last hour. He was wrong

One day she got up she could all do her garden go to church... .afterwards she had her clothes made by a seamstress and she wore almost only white, a little blue on Sundays she got up very early she prepared the Sunday meal (my grandmother was a real cordon bleu) .. . .roasted pork, white rice and red beans or pigeon peas.... avocado casave cod ti punch mango lemonade or corrosol juice or guava juice for the children finally we were spoiled on the day of the lord... .but you had to follow her to church. Except my brother Guy who was gone once and he fell in the church so he didn't come with us.

So one day my father left Guadeloupe to live in France and left us at Grandmother's we were all at Man Fanny's with more happiness and cheerfulness because we had found a family G., cousins ​​of our very ages close and kind.

We weren't very obedient Poor Mammy...she was screaming telling us when you go to France, I WILL BE RELIEVED...but deep down she adored us too much.

Separation from our grandmother and us

Then one day we flew to France decision of my older brother Evert and for several weeks she cried a lot Man Fanny and I was very sad to leave her. ..

Very quickly in France we were with my big brother...we had more comfort, we moved several times for more space.. .but we lacked that warmth and attention, I remember my brother Guy when he arrived he was crying every night he couldn't stand being taken away from his grandmother and his country he always said he was going to leave again and he did it when he came of age in France hewas called to go to the army he refused he was in Guadeloupe but there.

We have caught up with her since they live with him and his Hungarian West Indian family in Guadeloupe.

Separation from my older brother and us in France

(my older big brother Evert was married but had a double life he had divorced and remarried)

It was to be expected one day my older brother without discussion taking us back to boarding school my sister Marie Line and I at the Catholic sisters Françoise Cabrini school and my brothers, Guy, Sydney and Jean Pierre at the Francis Barbe boys' boarding school.

My brothers were not well there unlike us my sister marie line left at 18 to leave boarding school but for me personally my life was much better I grew up with catholic sisters and girls from several countries, very few Asians and Frenchblack girls during the holidays we went to many regions in France and Europe skiing in the winter and to the sea in the summer ... good life finally pocket money every month ... buying clothes in winter and summer leisure and outings....

But not the love nor of Maman and Man fanny I underline that I needed them so much that I still wet the bed at 8 years old....Sister Sophie was very kind and understanding she woke me up....

In 1980 We had a surprise my big brother paid us the trip to see Grandma in the West Indies it was a big surprise for my grandmother, 17 years had passed, all surprise she called me Fem catalog ..( female model)

I realized that the passion for FASHION came from my Grandmother and my daughter Nina who is studying fashion design today in 2023, in Paris took her genes, I remember when my grandmother went to church it was VERY FUN, it was a real FASHION show all ofwhite dress, matching bag with a capeline hat and a beautiful, very elegant long dress, heeled shoe with a pearl necklace and jewelry from the Bon Parfum HELIOTROPHE BLANC.

At the end of the mass she had many compliments for her elegance here is the explanation for my daughter Nina, a wink...my darling eeeee.

After my return from vacation in 1980 from the West Indies I had decided to go and help and live with Man Fanny so I booked my ticket but she died before I left How sad....

In short I lived my story in Guadeloupe and all my childhood in France single mom I had 3 beautiful children Marvin, (Bonhomme) Mounina (Nina) and the last Ethan (Thanou) (Son) with love but alone.. . .like many single women raising children, there are many of us.

Gilberte E.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[actualtext]

Nov 14, 2022

A timeline

My mom got pregnant in high school at the age of 16 with my sister Nicole and had to drop out. Nicole's father, as far as I know, wasn't in the picture and died very young. So, from the very beginning, my mom was a single parent. My mom was a very hard worker, so more often than not, my sister had to take care of me. I'm pretty sure my sister is the one who potty trained me. Nicole is 11 years older than me. My mom met my dad (as far as I was told, he was a friend of her older brothers), and they got pregnant with me when she was 28 and he was 40. I'm not sure to this day if I was conceived before or after the wedding, but I do know that my parents were catholic. All that meant back then was that contreception was a no-no, that if you got pregnant, you'd better be married before the baby is born out of wedlock, and that abortion wasn't an option at all. At around the age of 6 months, my parents decided to move to colorado, and I'm not sure why. I don't have any early memories of my father, especially not when we lived in Colorado, because he decided to move back to San Antonio before I could identify as an individual and formulate memories. I suspect it wasn't long after having me that my parents separated. Later in life, my sister told me my dad would beat my mom and just treat her really poorly.

Despite not having a high school diploma, my mom was able to find a job at a nursing home. I remember her saying she was a CNA, but I'm not really sure how that was possible without a high school diploma . I know for fact that she worked at a nursing home though. She would have to take me with her sometimes when she didn't have child care. She made enough money to support two children and live in an apartment. My sister eventually ran away to San Antonio from Colorado (at least that's how I remember it), because she missed her boyfriend Javie. Nicole got pregnant at the age of 14, and had her first baby, my nephew Javie, at 15. She then had her second child, my niece Mari, at 16 or 17. By this point, she had her own family unit and wasn't really present in our lives. All I really remember is that it was me and my mom for a while. Occasionally my sister would live with us for a few months but she didn't really get along with my mom so she would eventually leave and be on her own again.

For whatever reason, what I assume to be the death of my uncle Ruben, her brother, my mom decided to return to Texas. This is the point that our lives got turned upside down. Without a highschool diploma, she couldn't find a good paying, stable job. she usually had to work two jobs, usually fast food entry-level jobs that flopped just as quickly as she found them. She was always working, which meant she was never around. I remember vividly having to couch surf with different family members thinking that we were just spending the night and having slumber parties everywhere. I hated how many schools I went to. Ultimately, I went to 7 elementary schools, three middle schools and luckily only one high school. This was before finding out about the mckinney vento act, and how if you're homeless, under this act you can stay at the same school regardless of your physical address.

Another thing that happened when we moved back to Texas was that I met my father for the first time since being able to form memories. It wasn't shortly after, that he molested me. My mom would get upset that I wet my bed until I was 11 years old, but she didn't know this was a common side effect of child molestation. I remember whenever we would visit him, he would kiss me in a very non fatherly way...he would try to make out with me. I hated going to see him, but I continued to go because I didn't know how to tell anyone what he was doing to me.

My mother and I continued to be chronically homeless up until the day she died. I was 23. Two days prior, she and I were really excited because I had just gotten a job at a local grocery store. The night prior, I'd just gone to see the band Blink 182 play in austin. I didn't want to wake my mom up so I stayed with a boyfriend that night. The next morning, she hadn't texted me which was unusual for her, so I went back home around noon. When I entered our apartment she was nowhere to be found on the lower floor, so I went upstairs to look for her. I noticed the bathroom light was on so I knocked on the door and called for her, but there was no answer. I opened the door and was immediately hit in the face with a cloud of steam. It was almost hard to breathe with how thick the steam was. I called out to her and when I heard no answer, I pulled back the curtain and that's when I noticed she was laying in the tub, lifeless. The proceeding moments are all kind of a blur, but I remember yelling at the top of my lungs for her to wake up, and repeating "mom" overs again. When my boyfriend who had driven me grabbed my shoulder, I kind of snapped out of whatever was making me wail the way I had been. He needed me to give the authorities my information so they could come help us. I remember feeling so guilty that I hadn't been there. I had been out having fun and she had been alone. One of my cousins had told me that they had had a conversation with her earlier that morning which made me feel a little better that it hadn't happened while I was at the concert. An aunt (her sister Irma) asked me "why weren't you here for her?" and that just killed me. I felt fortunate to have received a degree in social work because we had been taught what leads a person to addiction and whatnot. I feel like that was the only reason I didn't turn to drugs and alcohol after my mom passed away. My mom had bipolar disorder so sometimes I was her golden child and other times I was only someone who held her back in her eyes. I have a lot of trauma related to my mom like my lack of self esteem, my irrational fear of cockroaches which is also tied to being homeless, but I think finding her is the heaviest.

When my mom passed away, we had been living in public housing. The officials asked if I wanted to stay and let me know that I owed them money because I never reported having gotten a job, and that I would have to be added to a waiting list like everyone else since it was no longer me and my mother, but me alone. It was pretty obvious this wasn't the life I wanted to live, so I told them that I actually didn't want to live in public housing anymore. I couch surfed with my sister for a week until she asked when I would be leaving because she didn't want to get in trouble with her apartment officials. I then couch surfed for a few months between three locations: my cousin Pricilla, my boyfriend at the time, Gabriel, and my friend Amanda. Gabriel, my boyfriend of four years, got tired of me being sad all the time and told me "I dread coming home to you." So I ended that relationship. Some of my belongings at my cousin's house had been stolen, the most valuable being my mom's gold rosaries, so I left that place. Amanda had a whole family, and I felt from the very beginning that I was burdening them, so as soon as I could I left. Thankfully at this point, my friend Rick needed a roommate so we got a place together, and while I have lived in many places since then, I haven't been homeless since.

My relationship with my sister has always been strained. She's 11 years older than me so we don't really have much in common, and at some point in her young life had to take care of me because our mother was always working. She also had a very different relationship without mother because she was the first child, and because our mom was just a child when she had her. While with me, our mom had already matured and had experience being a mother. My sister had to grow up at an early age and didn't really get to experience her youth. I grew up seeing her take her frustrations out on her children, which made me dislike her to no end. Her daughter/my niece is one of my favorite people. On the night of my niece's graduation, my sister kicked her out. I was out of town when it happened but when my niece called me, I offered her a place to stay immediately. She stayed with me for about three months, during which time my sister convinced my mom's side of the family that I was housing a runaway. They all stopped talking to me, despite my attempt to clear up what had happened. When our mother passed (before the incident with my niece), my sister was living in Corpus Christi and needed a car because hers had been totalled. Because I needed my sister here with me, I agreed when she asked me to finance a vehicle under my name. She said she would be able to make the payments and that she already had a job lined up at a place she had previously worked at. I had no reason to not believe her, so I signed for the car. Three or four months had passed and she hadn't made a single payment, messing up my credit. When I confronted her about it, she said something along the lines of "if you're so worried about your credit, you can just take the car." At this point in life, I embarrassingly enough didn't know how to drive. Nor did I have the financial stability I needed in order to finance a car, I was couch surfing for fucks sake. She knew this, so there was nothing I could do. I have a brother from my father and his ex wife. He's older than my sister but I don't know by how much because I've only seen him a handful of times. I guess I should be grateful he hasn't had the opportunity to screw me over or hurt me other than by not being around.

At my current age of 29, my aunt Nancy (my dad's sister) asked me to drive her son/my cousin Michael to Dallas to pick up his son/my second cousin Jeremy. As soon as I met Jeremy, who I had never even known about up until this point, we became instant best friends. He became one of my favorite cousins, a favorite person, the brother I had always wanted. The two months that followed, we trauma bonded over the fact that we had both been touched as children. It was the night before halloween, and I figured since Jeremy was new to town, he probably hadn't made any plans, so I invited him to a halloween party I had been invited to. At this party, Jeremy and I partook in drinking as well as smoking pot. Weed was easy to come by because Jeremy works at a dispensary. Up until this point in life, I had only ever smoked weed once or twice a year because I didn't like how it made me more anxious than usual. By the time we left, we had sobered up from the alcohol but we were still high. I drove Jeremy to his fathers house. Jeremy said I could stay the night if I wanted to because he lived on the south side of San Antonio, and I lived in San Marcos, about an hour away. I had stayed at Jeremy's house before because sometimes I drove late, and both him and his father had offered me a place to stay with open arms many times before. I really appreciated them for that, and I didn't think anything of the offer this time around. I sat at Jeremy's dining room table for a bit, talking to him about a girl that he used to like who lives in Dallas. He said he didn't feel like he had feelings for her anymore, despite just recently seeing her, and crying because we had to leave her behind. I'm not really sure what my response was, but I remember being really sleepy and telling him I was gonna crash out already. I thought it was exhaustion mixed with the fact that we had smoked weed which has the common side effect of sleepiness. So, I went to sleep really heavy that night, as a lightweight when it comes to smoking weed. I was woken up with Jeremy towering over me, giving me little kisses. One of his hands was under my shirt stroking my breast, and the other was making its way into my pants. once I realized what was happening, I pushed him off of me and yelled "Jeremy what the fuck??" I remember pulling myself away from him and cradling myself in a fetal position while sobbing. I remember telling him how he ruined everything. He just kept telling me to calm down, but kept his distance. I grabbed my things and left as fast as I could.He betrayed me. Previous to this incident I had considered moving to Indiana with a friend who would have provided a support system for me outside of Texas. Lack of a support system was the only thing keeping me in Texas, really. This event with Jeremy solidified the idea of going.

I've done everything by the book up until this point, and I'm genuinely a good person. Despite being homeless, I excelled at my studies, ranking in at #7 out of about 450 students in high school. I even made time to volunteer, which I love doing. Despite the odds, I went to college and graduated with a degree in social work. I feel like I've been working so hard to keep my head up and stay true to myself, and still these bad things happen to me. I'm really hoping that these are all just signs I need to get out of Texas, and that Indiana will prove that by providing opportunities that I haven't had in the past, and by making me feel something other than betrayed and abandoned. We shall see.

[stolenatbirth]

as my son, now plays in the majors.  Later on in the story I will give his name!  The abuse started with my gay cousin Mike, Susans’ brother whose father raped half of the family!  Jimmy Stewart!  Mike did just stupid things like spin the bottle and touching my penis! Jimmy took me to work one day, as I will never forget!

We were delivering peanut butter to Teddy Peanut Butter in Charleston MA! As

we were pulling out he asked to see my penis!  I was only 10 years old!  He just touched it thank God!  But, later in life, I found out he raped my aunt Eileen when she was a teen!  That is Jimmy’s wife’s little sister!  This man was a pig!  Then at

covid Emme Stewart called me and was depressed! I said Emma listen I just found my identical twin brother as that Voto family tried to lock me up with lied!  I said, is everything ok?  She said sadly yes!  She then said Jason remember when my mother died of breast cancer?  I was 15 years old!  I said yes!  She said we were at a family function as you came over to me and said Emma any boys mess with you, you call or come see me!  Well, after you walked away I said to my grandmother Pat, a Stewart who was my favorite aunt! Emma.  I said, grandma he doesn’t look like them, and he doesn’t act like them!!  Pat’s shunned her in silence and said Emma please don’t ever say that again, As we know now years later why she said

that!  Back to childhood, I was always separated from those 2 fake brothers of mine when I went to see my Nana or  I went to see my grandfather Arthur Dolan on the other side of the family!  I went up to Grand Lake Stream Maine for a week

with Arthur.  By the way this all came out.  My fake mother told her sisters, when Arthur died not to tell anyone of his death!  Evil!  Mary’s younger sister Barbara

Dolan Storella said!  Mary that is impossible!! There is a little thing called the internet and Facebook, not to mention Twitter! This evil woman knew if we drove

way up to Maine for his wake, I would see my own brother and sisters eyes and know they were my family!  Pure evil!  I remember I loved my grandfather now knowing he was really my uncle!  I was 8 years old when he took me to Grand Lake Stream to his acres of land!  We called it the Poor Farm.  I don’t know why

they just did!  He took me  for a week as Stephen John and his son David were up

there that summer before me!  The cleaned and worked doing landscaping and ripping weeds out of the pond!  When I was there I was getting into mischief.  I would let the air out of his farming tractor!  Try to clime down a 300 ft well.  Boy was I a hyper kid!  Well we were going home from my grandfather put me on a raft in his little pond!  He said just float around while I mow the farm!  I was like  good luck with that!  The tires were very low!  He said we are gonna leave at 10am

to go to the dog track in Seabrook!  Post time is 12:30pm. We don’t want to be late! Gramps was a big gambler!  Back in the day he had his own dogs and kennel!  He got them from Ireland and had many champions!     5.

[emmerdale-character-bracket]

Rhona's 16 votes couldn't hold up to Diane's 34 votes.

Rhona is the local vet working alongside Paddy and occasionally Vanessa. She arrived as a locum for Zoe Tate in 2001. She is involved in a brief fling with Marlon Dingle but life gets in the way of the two. She is away for years and returns in 2010 to become partners in the practice. She rekindles her relationship with Marlon but it doesn't last long as she falls for Marlon's best friend Paddy. They get together but Rhona is pregnant with Marlon's baby. Even with high likelihood of Down syndrome she carries on with the pregnancy and baby Leo is born in May of 2011. A year later Paddy and Rhona marry and Paddy is offered a job in New Zealand. This causes problems as Leo was due to be separated from his father. The plans fall through. The next year Rhona begins to suffer from addiction to pain killers after experiencing backpain. Her good friend Vanessa tries to help her get clean but this proves difficult. Rhona manipulates Vanessa who claimed to have feelings for her to help her sober up. An overdose reveals the truth to everyone and she goes into rehab. Paddy and Rhona's marriage falls apart in 2016 when she uncovers an affair Paddy had with Leo's teacher Tess. Rhona then moves on and begins a relationship with Tess' widow Pierce. People are against her relationship with Pierce but she carries on. Her relationship with Vanessa struggles as she learns of a sex tape that the reluctant Rhona and Pierce had made. A lot of animus was driven by Pierce who tried to wreck the women's friendship. They marry in 2017 and shortly after he suggest they leave the village. She refuses and he rapes her violently. The trauma of the assault makes her relapse and she goes to rehab. Pierce is convicted of the rape and goes to prison. Later on while dating Pete Barton he accidentally drives a tractor into the barn she is in injuring her badly. She has to have a hysterectomy and goes into early menopause. Rhona's inability to have any more children ultimately dooms her relationship with Pete who wishes to have kids of his own. Rhona bonds with Graham, Kim's henchman. They have a secret game of chess and develop feelings for one another. They plan to leave the village to start over and to be with each other. The plan never comes to anything when Graham is murdered. This begins an ordeal for Marlon who is imprisoned for the murder. It later is revealed that the murderer was Pierce after he was released from prison. Pierce also holds Vanessa and her son Johnny hostage for days. Pierce goes back to prison where he sends a letter from. He hopes she would track down his son before he dies. She does this but later regrets leaving him a voice message. Vanessa meddles in the search and poses as Rhona to deter Marcus. The truth is revealed and Marcus never gets to see his dad before he dies. She inherits large amounts of money from him and uses it to buy into Butler's farm. Rhona and Marlon find one another again and get together once more. During a botched proposal Rhona's mother Mary arrives. The pair do eventually get engaged but Marlon suffers a major stroke. Rhona sticks by the love of her life and continues to cheer him on as he learns to do everything again from speaking to eating to walking. They marry in an emotional service in 2022. Rhona is a levelheaded professional vet who isn't afraid of a bit of muck. She is a devoted mother to Leo and stepmother to April.

Round 5