#mark hamill talks common sense

[trikadekaphile]

May the vote be with us. I'm not trying to be funny. This is serious, folks. VOTE FOR BIDEN, even if you're not crazy about him. (I'm not.) Because if Trump wins, YOU WILL NEVER VOTE AGAIN.

ETA: Vote for Kamala Harris now...but the overall message remains the same.

[retconsatlightspeed]

The Saber & The Last Jedi

Continuing my post about Luke on the Island, I think I want to focus in on how I would have handled that weighty piece of symbolism.

It's a common talking point among the chuds that Luke tossing the saber was "disrespectful" to starwars fans, and while I think most of them are idiots, I think I'd change how that note was played.

Like a lot of fans of the 1.5 good movies in the sequel trilogy, I was really disappointed that Rey didn't get her own saber (or any actual jedi training but that's for another post) until post the resolution.

Fallen Order is by far my favourite piece of starwars media ever, so I'm infinity biased towards meaningful character growth as expressed through laser sword construction.

So here's my Pitch:

Have Luke drop the saber after Rey hands it to him. Holding it with reverence for but a moment before it slips from his hands. Play the following moment for laughs, sure, as a shocked Rey races after the priceless heirloom down all those stone steps she just spent an hour walking up before it tumbles into the sea (have her make that adorable panic/confounded scrunchy face) but then we turn the camera back to Luke and we see our lost hero is awash in utmost sorrow. For Rey the saber symbolizes hope, heroism, king arthur style YOU ARE THE CHOSEN ONE shit. Her job was to get it back to him, a nobody playing errand girl for a legend. For Luke, that sword is a representation of all his failures. His failure to live up to the legacy of the Jedi, his initial failure to defeat Vader, his later failure to stop Kylo, his failure to protect the galaxy since. That saber is HEAVY, and he cannot carry that weight.

The Saber is going to be the central motif around which this mentor student relationship is going to be formed. It's a passing of the torch, but not in the heavy handed IP servicing manner of Rey taking on the skywalker name. We're going to go back to the roots of Starwars as a Samurai story, As a martial arts story, and we're going to do it using the themes that episode 7 established god damn it.

Quick recap of my headcanons and a few things you need to know:

Forces awakens is centrally ABOUT the legacy of Starwars. There's nostalgia and fan service, yes, but it also has a lot to say ABOUT nostalgia. That's why our main villain is a Darth Vader fanboy who's at the head of an army of Neonazis, none of which are happy that all these... other people hold any power in the galaxy

In my own telling of events, Luke went to the island not to give up, but in an attempt to reconnect with the force after Kylo defeated him and severed his connection. His isolation started as an attempt to become the hero the galaxy needed him to be again, and he's all but lost hope.

Rey asks Luke to come back and join the fight, Luke says he can't, he's not ready. Delightful bickering ensues with Rey being flabbergasted that the hero she's been inspired by since childhood would sit by let things in the galaxy get worse (hey there new fans, this remind you of anything?). Luke, now a crabby old man, gets to use all of Mark Hamil's genius comedic delivery.

Eventually we're led to a scenic overlook/meditation circle and Luke Challenges Rey to reach out and feel the island. It's a holy place, suffused with the force, and here we get to see a bit of what Luke must have been like as a teacher, calmly guiding her through the opening of her force-sense the way that Obi-wan taught him.

Luke, serious: "Can you feel it... can you FEEL it? Racing through everything, Binding everything together? " Rey, awed: " Yes... I think...I Yes I.." Luke, deadpan " .....because I can't"

More Shocked Rey, more bickering, Luke's getting more resentful, it's like the galaxy threw this girl in his face to remind him of everything he failed at (it did, he just hasn't realized what that MEANS yet). Luke puts his foot down and tells her to go home, he'll come back when the force has spoken to him and told him how to fix all this.

Rey almost considers it... she takes a step down the trail while Luke moves to return to his hermitage, there's a pause.

R, hesitant, turning something over in her mind, knows Luke is carrying so many burdens and she's about to add more: "You really can't feel the force anymore?" L, irritated, barely paying her any more attention: no R, turning to face him: Then you wouldn't know.... Han Solo, he's dead.

Luke, looks at her, all his sourness melting away but it's different than when he held the sword. This isn't the old Jedi master feeling the weight of his burden, this is Luke Skywalker, the boy who risked everything to save his best friends, learning that one of those friends has died and he didn't even know. Twenty years on a rock trying to find an answer to save his friends and he's STILL failing them. He crumples, Rey rushes to pick him up she's all apologies she barely understands. She was there she saw it happen, she let it happen, she FELT it happen

L, talking over her, grabbing onto her robes and arms to PULL himself up and look at her face to face, there is a FIRE in his eyes now, This is Anakin's son. : "Come inside, Tell me Everything"

There's a few more beats I want to hit but I'm not sure about the exact order.

Luke Reunite with Chewie and R2

Evening's fallen and Luke comes to share Rey's fire as she looks out over the sea. A shared sorrow has bridged the gap between them a little. Luke insists that he can't come back, Rey protests, but he interjects that he can still do good. He's willing to teach her. She felt the island so she must have some talent. Rey is blindsided, she honoured by the prospect but she thought she was just bringing Luke back, she doesn't have time to train, she has to get back to her friends, the resistance, the fight against the first order. Can't he come back with her? Luke clues her in that the force brought them both here, to this place, it's special, it's their chance to rebuild the Jedi the right way.

Something something subspace beacon signalling back to their friends that they're alright. Gives us a chance to cut away to the B story for a while.

Rey's training is going spottily. she's got an instinctive connection with the force, bolstered by the island, but she's chafing against the Jedi temple approved curriculum that Luke salvaged from his first school/the empire's archives. She already KNOWS how to fight, but she's trained with a staff, so when they're using training swords she keeps attacking form a further reach or grabbing what would be the lightsaber's blade. Luke chides her about burning off her hand (he's got a metal one)

After a particular frustrating lesson they get into Rey's preconceived notions of what the Jedi were like ( more accurately, what LUKE was like, because that's her one touch stone) and how when she was left alone on Jakku she would imagine all these things. T, and then a pause about Rey being left alone, a comedic and decisive " I'm NOT your father" from Luke, followed up with " One thing I've learned, you don't need to be from somewhere to be special. The force doesn't care, and its better that way" . This leads them to commiserating about how AWFUL their respective desert planets were. We see that they're growing closer.

Also a chance for Luke to hint about his personal life, he was close to a few people over the years ( Wiggle room for every shipper in the galaxy), but between dismantling the empire and founding the new Jedi he never had time to start a family, there was always something else ( here we see how much being "the hero" has taken from him.)

End of the movie's coming up, it's been something like a month or two. Rey's weathered and calloused but she's in the best fighting shape she's ever been. She's got pretty good with the lightsaber but it's slow going. Luke's really gotten back into teaching, Rey help inspired hope in him, but now he's putting the weight of heroism onto her shoulders, hoping that she can correct HIS failures, the way Obi-wan did with him. R2 has been waging war against the porgs infesting the falcon, Chewie has himself a cozy little fishing hut by the shoreline and is fully on vacation by this point.

Rey fails yet another Jedi test, both she and Luke are frustrated. Our friends have recovered important information in the B plot and Rey knows that if she doesn't rejoin them soon she's effectively going to miss out on the next movie. A forboding storm thunders on the horizon, Luke catches Rey looking at it and cautions " You're not ready for that" , idly rubbing the place where he lost his hand. Rey questions whether she'll ever be ready. She's not him, she's not a Jedi, she's Rey from knowhere and however lucky she's been up to this point she was never MEANT to be here. It SHOULD be him. Luke feels shame again, and ends the lesson, tells her to get ready for supper. Rey eyes a nearby boat.

Cut ahead, Chewie's got a weird but delicious alien fish ready to eat and the rain is baring down outside. Asks where Rey is and we have a bit of fun with the puppets, before he looks outside the window and centers our view of a section of jagged rock barely cresting out of the waves, far from the island.

Rey's paddled out to this crumbling stone edifice and is doing saber katas on the stones in the middle of the storm. It's clear that she's done this before but never in such harsh weather. She slips, makes mistakes, but keeps on with it. Her form is approaching the super elaborate flourishes of the prequel era. The thunder rumbles and lighting strikes one of the rocks nearby her, causing it to crumble. She refocuses on the storm. The rumble reminds her of the earth splitting open back at starkiller base, jumping between rocks reminds her of her fight with Kylo. She goes through it again, harder, trying to make up for inexperience with effort. The wind howls worse and thunder rumbles again, Rey leaps in the air and DEFLECTS LIGHTING WITH HER SWORD, causing the bolt to streak off and cause an explosion in the water. Then another, then another, She HAS THIS, mostly.

Out of the depths comes a giant predatory eel monster, drawn by the explosions and looking for a snack. She could probably take it if they were on a level playing field, but she's on a very un-level series of rock pillars and is going to have to fight both the monster AND the weather.

The fight is tense, jumping between rocks, dodging waves and lighting bolts and razor teeth, slipping and falling into the water, barely managing to scramble out. Just when she's ready to land a killing blow the beast thrashes, getting hold of her leg in its jaw and CRUNCHES, shredding muscle and bone before throwing her aside to brutally impact a stone pillar and sending the saber out into the ocean. Ray, desperate, knowing the creature is closing in reaches out for her weapon with the force just like she did at the end of the last film.. and just like last time it comes ripping through the air, only to be struck by lightning in the middle of its arc. Shock sets in, she tries to get up and it becomes very evident that she's both badly injured and has broken atleast one of her legs. Disbelief surges through her, shame, failure. Getting the shit kicked out of her might not be worse that DESTROYING LUKE SKYWALKER'S LIGHTSABER.

The beast rises, ready to devour her. Rey's hurt it and there's more malice than hunger in its eyes at this point. The thunder rumbles again, and there's a flash... and the familiar sound of the Millennium Falcon's guns firing cuts through the sound of the storm as it lands a direct hit on the monster.

Cut to Luke Skywalker in the GUNNER SEAT . He's left the island and in a moment of desperation he's remembered that he was still a hero LONG before he became a Jedi Master. Force or no force he's still that idiot farmboy who heard the call of someone in trouble and left everything behind to save them. With Chewie at the helm The Falcon does a strafing run through the storm to scare the eel away before lowering down its platform to get Rey back up. Cut to a shot of Luke on the platform bathed in light which is shining down on Rey, his hand outstretched to her this time, the hero she heard about as a kid. The Force has delivered the answer he sought.

It's the next day, the storm has parted and the clouds are picking up the colours of sunrise. Rey's bandaged as best they can, wrapped in a blanket, Luke's changed out of his hermit robes and into something nice... ish. They look out over the water and once the niceties are out of the way, Luke Mentions that they're getting ready to leave.

Rey is shocked, she's not ready, she wasn't ready for the lighting stones so she won't ever be ready, she's never going to be a Jedi.

Luke agrees, but maybe that's not such a bad thing. Like him the Jedi lost sight of the people for the sake of an ideal, and trying to stick to that ideal is what kept him on this island while the galaxy descended into war yet again. It was the same dogmatism that let his father sip down the darkside and doomed the old republic. Doomed them. In trying to recreate their ways he was losing sight of the people again, lost sight of his nephew.

He will be the last Jedi, but she's going to be something else, something better, and he's going to Be there for her the way he wishes his mentors could have been there for him.

The sun's risen while they were talking, Chewie roars, R2 beeps, It's time to get going. Luke says he's all packed and pats the holster containing the Jedi texts he collected, but asks her if there's anything she's forgetting.

Rey's puzzled, before Luke nods to the sea.

R: " But It's... I lost it, it's gone" L: "Nothing's ever gone, It just... changes, and everything has to change sometime."

Rey holds her hand out to the ocean, tentatively, she pulls, but her force falters, her faith wavers. Luke's hand settles over hers. He still hasn't gotten his powers back, but together they pull and the broken pieces of his lightsaber come up from the water, glistening, dawn playing in the kyber crystal.

The Gang takes off in the Falcon, off into what we realize is a binary sunrise, it's a long hyperspace Journey back to the Resistance. Interspersed we see Rey tinkering on something, putting that scavenger knowhow to use. The Falcon Lands, we have a wordness reunion between our friends. Luke and Leia, Rey, Finn, Poe, and Rose (looking a little worse for wear after their adventures). Everyone is crowding around Luke, but we see Rey being helped into a high tech cast, which allows her to stand on her injured leg Without needing to use her staff, like she has been since disembarking. Standing proudly as she can, and mostly to show off to her friends, flips a newly installed switch midway down the haft, causing the upper end to ignite in a flickering blade, the Pieces of Luke's old saber incorperated into its design. It's not like any lightsaber that's come before it, but it's hers. The shot pans out as she realizes that more and more eyes are turning to her, Luke having silently directed all the attention that was on him to her, his apprentice.

The torch has been passed, and we have a new hero.

[theconstitutionisgayculture]

If you’ll humor a poor elderly 28 year old for a bit, I’ve been mad for the past few days and I’d like to vent to someone. The newest Fire Emblem game came out, and since I’ve been Touhou-dodging spoilers, I only just recently looked up the actors for the game. And I found out that they replaced a long-time voice actor for a staple character (Anna), and people were celebrating because the actress is conservative (and like not even VISIBLY conservative, she doesn’t talk politics at ALL) (1)

(2) So people are celebrating her being replaced, right? Well her replacement actress is a “Believe All Victims” woman who suddenly decided not to believe all victims when it was revealed her fiancé is a twice-divorced domestic abuser who has recorded threats of killing one wife’s dog and threatening the other (or the same one, details are fuzzy) that he’d beat her with a TV remote. And she actively defended him and is still engaged to him. (2, I swear 3 will be the last one)

(3) And I know this is a phenomenon that we KNOW is hypocritical bullshit, but I still feel compelled to ask: how are people so vitriolic over someone’s politics that they’d willingly take someone worse? Like… I absolutely don’t care about someone’s politics, so long as they’re not assholes. One of my favorite actors who has a sexy-as-fuck voice is one of those far-left types, I could not give less of a shit so long as he’s not a douchebag or a literal criminal.

First off, exCUSE you with that elderly 28 year old crap. As a 35 year old who just got over turning 30, you shut your youthful, radiant mouth. Enjoy your 20s. Be grateful each day to be further away from your teens.

Now to your actual ask, lol

I'm gonna be making some of assumptions of motivation here, because I can't actually read minds, but for most of these people, it's seems to be because nothing matters more than The Cause. The thing is, The Cause is always changing. Sometimes, The Cause is general left wing politics. In that case, they'll usually ignore or excuse things like abuse or misogyny if they had already previously supported the person accused of those things against an Evil Conservative. (see, Joe Biden killing #MeToo, Bill Clinton raping Juanita Broaddrick, Ted Kennedy and the Car That Wouldn't Stay Out of the Water, etc). Sometimes, The Cause is feminism, in which case being a Democrat or a liberal who does the Wrong Thing might not protect them if they're a man. (See, Johnny Depp) Sometimes The Cause is transgenderism, is which case it doesn't matter how feminist or left wing you are, you must be destroyed for not enthusiastically supporting every aspect of trans rights activism or even associating with anyone who doesn't support every aspect of trans rights activism in even the most tangential ways (see, JK Rowling, Mark Hamill, TERFs in general).

The left, especially the socially conscious left, love eating their own. Their entire movement revolves around punishing the guilty and obsessively checking themselves and others for thoughtcrimes. That kind of frothing mob mentality doesn't leave much room for common sense or self-reflection. Which is exactly what the people at the top pushing these ideas want.

[themelodicenigma]

I think we've talked about this before but you know how lots of fans are frustrated with the way Kingdom Hearts portrays light vs dark? The complaint's usually something along the lines of, light & dark should both be portrayed as neutral and there should be a perfect balance between them, but KH portrays light as generally good and darkness as generally bad with some exceptions. I'm generally fine with that? I understand the frustrations with the inconsistencies and mixed messages, though.

I think KH works best when it talks about light shining brightest in the darkness, 'cause that's something that can work whether you're talking about light and dark in the most literal, neutral sense, or whether you're talking about light as a metaphor for good shining brightest and being most appreciated in the midst of bad things. Know what I'm saying?

Absolutely, and I agree for the most part, but I can see what they're saying too. Mostly in the sense that, we could use a bit more of the side of showing how the nature of light and how people utilize it can also come across as corrupted. But, not too much.

Some people just got to remember what path KH chooses for Light and Darkness. It's kind of traditional.

Traditional, I would say, is split into where Light = good and Darkness = bad is either absolute, OR, is a more "mostly, but not always", scenario. I think media does a fair share of that in this day and age to say it's both pretty common.

I think being fine with the imbalanced concept of Light and Darkness—this being the idea of Light naturally leaning towards good, while Darkness leans towards bad, but neither are absolute incapable of either good/bad in a black and white way (pun intended)—is okay, and it does make sense if you want to get into a conversation about the nature of these two things for certain media. But, as long as the "Light is mostly positively but can be corrupted, while Darkness is mostly corrupted, but can be used positively" is consistent in emphasizing this to be the case, then it's fine.

I'm definitely not saying it has to be limited to this, as I also think it's fine to portray Light and Darkness as complete neutral forces/elements that don't have any "morality properties" on the nature of living beings (e.g. just like other elements like Ice, Fire, Wind, Earth, etc)—but you could still argue that even in these cases, Light and Darkness still do have elemental properties that can be perceived as good or bad—for example, Light Magic is often used for healing, while Dark Magic is often depicted as destructive. It standing as "good or bad" is indirect, but still kind of there, especially if you throw in how characters are represented in using Light or Dark Magic.

With that being said, KH has it's world, and it's way of how elements, forces, and themes are handled. There IS Light and Dark abilities that seem like they could be neutral (Fire vs Dark Fire), but in KH, it does go beyond that as a concept. The way KH handles this is fine for the most part, mostly because at the end of the day, we have Riku and BBS. lol

We get the symbolic nature of Darkness as an element and force that can be used for good through basically any game featuring Riku, but I think where Nomura introduces the "Light can be corrupted" is in BBS, where it "coincidentally" is reminiscent of Star Wars—story and character parallels, heck even because Eraqus and Xehanort as characters are like the Jedi and Sith. Eraqus was Mark Hamill [Luke Skywalker] for crying out loud XD. And while Xehanort turned out to be more complex, he was straight up acting like Palpatine in BBS.

In Star Wars, it's a very common fan understanding of how it's written where the Jedi's way of thinking is, well, not that great in how it doesn't account for complexities of situations or human nature. Even if it is the light side, the doctrines of the Jedi often come across as "blind" to other important things in life, for sacrifices of what they think is needed to preserve the good.

Eraqus was a lot like the Jedi-counsel (again, I think Nomura did this on purpose, maybe there's even an interview about it), to the point to where he even tries to kill Ven, for the "light" and the "good". And we even have Aqua having some doubts about Eraqus' teaching on her journey, though there could've been more of that too.

I think people just wanted more of what BBS introduced, for that look at the people using Light as a corrupted thing. I mean, Xehanort talks about the "false light" to MoM, I believe too. But at the end of the day, if it's not really a rule in the KH world that Light and Darkness have no inherent properties of how it affects people, it's impact on the world, and are just completely neutral, then of course we won't get Light being "bad" as much as Darkness. KH sets different ideals for it's world in how Light and Dark inherently work.

Nothing wrong with that.

[danwhobrowses]

Why Star Wars: The Last Jedi Deserves More Respect

So after a handful of posts I think it’s time to bring back this one, the conflict was that I was considering reviews for Pokémon Sword and Shield as well as a review for Rise of Skywalker, but the latter made me think that this is an opportune moment to talk about the previous entry.  Like The Last Jedi, Rise of Skywalker has had divisive opinions, frankly I liked the film but I think TLJ was the best of the sequel trilogy, and I am going to explain why

Fair Warning, within this there’s gonna be spoilers for Rise of Skywalker, possibly Mandalorian, maybe Solo and definitely The Last Jedi...this will also be very long

So I know straight away that this is gonna get heat, there has been constant times where me saying that I liked TLJ has been considered trolling or ‘bait’, honestly I find myself baffled that people can hate it so vehemently, believing that the story is and I quote ‘the worst sequel ever’. While it is clear that Johnson had a different vision to Abrams, that was not a bad thing, a lot of the criticism the film gets are quite hypocritical in contrast to the Original Trilogy which is held to so much esteem, so to start I’m going to break that down. Small Disclaimer before I do: People are allowed to dislike things, not saying that if you do dislike it you are doing something wrong, just pointing out that it’s not wrong to like the film either. Disowning before Watching The first thing I think turned people off of TLJ was the interview Mark Hamill had before the film came out, people misconceiving his comments that it’s not the journey he expected seeing of Luke to mean that this is not a film he would approve of. The same almost happened with RoS with Abrams comment which was abridged to imply that Abrams disowned TLJ as well - he did not - but in a society where we want to home in on flaws and criticize before even seeing that was too wide a door left open. So without fault, TLJ already had a group of people set on disliking the film because it would be different to how they and Hamill wanted it to be and because it’s not exactly like the decanonized ‘Legends’ continuity - despite people being fine that Jacen Solo and Ben Skywalker had been merged to make Kylo Ren in The Force Awakens. It’s easy to point out that if you go into something adamant to dislike you’re going to get your wish, so the first point of order is to give something a chance to impress you, you can’t criticize something because an actor didn’t think it’d go that creative direction, Hamill did not hate this movie and people disliking their content does not automatically make it bad, Stannis from GoT hated the show, Alan Moore hates everything but that doesn’t mean Watchmen was bad, the actors for C3PO and R2-D2 hated each other but that doesn’t mean that when they acted their bond wasn’t great.

The ‘Luke is not Luke’ Criticism Hamill’s comments ease nicely into one of the main critiques that fans felt that Luke was not the same character he was in Return of the Jedi. People criticized his disconnection from the force which included tossing his lightsaber away in the opening scene, the Rashomon sequence where Luke considered striking down his own nephew - a move that ultimately turned Ben to the Dark, drinking green milk and that his last stand was a projection rather than a solid encounter. You know what I say to those criticisms?

They are bollocks, absolute nonsensical criticisms made to try and dismantle the best character of the movie. Hamill delivers his best for Luke in TLJ and his character arc is brilliant. I watched Blind Wave (a great youtube reactor channel) react to TLJ and the members noted how it was great that Luke had a character arc, something I wholly agree with. Luke was around 23 in Return of the Jedi (since the galaxy uses the standardized dating of Coruscant which has the most earth-like cycle), if you expect a 23 year old to have no room left to grow in the next 30 years of his life then I don’t think anything’s gonna get through to you, Luke is meant to be different, because since Jedi a lot of shit has happened. Luke’s discarding of the lightsaber shows his disconnect with the Force, something that had allowed the First Order to paint him as a myth and rendered everyone near-unable to find him, only tracked by the galactic map to Ahch-To from his past days of discovering remnants of Jedi past. Next let’s bring down the Rashomon sequence, the 3 tales of Ben’s turning. Initially, Luke painted a picture that he sensed that the darkness was too late, Ben woke and attacked him. Later Ben paints that Luke is lying, and that when Ben awoke Luke was there with his Lightsaber drawn with intent to kill him. The third story admits that both are correct, Luke drew his lightsaber in sensing the darkness, and Ben awoke to see it and retaliated.

This story peeves people mainly because they say that in Jedi ‘Luke was willing to fight for a single hope of light in his Father but was willing to kill his nephew for a bad dream’. A ridiculous comment that waters down and ignores the bigger picture though. For one, while Luke wanted to save his father and sensed good in him, he still ended up cutting his dad’s hand off, the indication that much like his father Luke - as he had always been in the Original Trilogy - was still susceptible to his emotions, including the negative ones. The other reason this statement is foolhardy is because they don’t listen to Luke’s narration, where he explains that it was a fleeting moment of panic and arrogance, his ego as ‘Luke Skywalker, Jedi Master’ took over when he sensed that Ben was already turned by Snoke, and it was only for a split second which he immediately regrets. It’s this moment that snowballs into why Luke disconnects himself from the force, his ego as a saviour to Jedi led to the downfall of his nephew - which led to his best friend and sister separating, the rise of the First Order being like a second Empire and the massacre of most of his other jedi students, he realised that this was the same ego that led to the previous Jedi’s downfall to Vader and Sidious and thus came to the conclusion that maybe the Jedi way is not the right way. Not only is this a brilliantly done tragedy for the character but it’s a progression that identifies with public opinion of jedi ways and the pompousness that led to Anakin’s turn to the dark side as depicted in the prequels. The use of Rashomon also connects to the Jedi/Sith connections to Samurai which was a great touch by Johnson. The green milk scene was a weird one I’ve seen being criticized, like people are fine with Calamarian fishmen but a Tatooine/Naboo humanoid can’t drink green milk? I think I need to remind you that Luke drinks blue milk on Tatooine, he is a moisture farmer as well, the ‘green milk’ scene was a depiction of how Luke survived on Ahch-To as Rey followed him, his lifestyle disconnected from the force as he lived as basically a farm boy. I don’t know why people got so mad about the colour of milk but you can’t expect those nuns to have fed him roast porgs every day The final criticism is his last stand, something I will touch on a bit later as well. In terms of Luke, people were disappointed that it wasn’t Luke actually there and while yes it would’ve been great to watch Luke tear down AT-ATs luke the EU, but he literally says that he won’t do that

it’s not a matter of can’t, it’s a matter of him strutting up to the army of the First Order will not end the war, most people don’t even know if he exists. Showing up will have inspired the resistance yes but if Luke was shown killed or captured that hope would then be instantly diminished, and Snoke and Ren would definitely be going for Luke’s head to make that so. This is why Luke goes via projection, instead of his ragged hermit self where he’d likely die similarly to how Kenobi did, he demonstrates a highly advanced force power to display himself as a clean-cut warrior who shrugs off the full might of the First Order’s arsenal and humiliates its brand new Supreme Leader, while disappearing. That stand does the Resistance far better than him showing up in person, because now the legend of Luke Skywalker lives longer than he does, he inspires a new wave of Jedi who understand his sacrifice and rebels who have just seen how one man can expose the weakness of the First Order. Luke’s last living gesture is one that inspires hope, before he becomes one with the Force at peace. If anything that is as beautiful as it is tragic of an end for Luke, but by no means is that bad. The Rose Tico ‘Issue’ Luke wasn’t the only character to get on the wrong side of criticism, undoubtedly Kelly Marie Tran got it the worst. Despicable people flocked to harass her over her character, throwing about racism just for that added content of being a horrid human being. Her character, Rose Tico, was a newly introduced character from the Resistance who joins Finn and Poe’s arcs, her main non-racist criticism is her act of saving Finn from the Laser Battering Ram ‘She has this stupid speech about saving people with love while a laser battering ram breaks down the door to kill a bunch of people’ A common theme seems to be that people are taking things the absolute wrong way. Rose’s journey with Finn is an interesting arc where she seeks to make sure her sister’s sacrifice - caused by Poe’s rash personality - is not in vain while accompanying a ‘hero of the resistance’, what she is unaware of is how her assistance relates to Finn’s journey as he tries to live up to the esteem she sees him in, he had always considered himself a defector rather than a rebel. Rose (and DJ) open his eyes to a reality that not everything is black and white, he left the First Order in TFA because he believed that they were ‘wrong’ and so by default the resistance had to be ‘right’ but TLJ challenged Finn to see both sides and make a choice for himself, a choice that is made thanks to Rose. However, his embrace of being a rebel is why he is adamant to try and sacrifice himself for the laser battering ram. I have to point out that until Rose stepped in I thought Finn was gonna die, I thought it really ballsy and a little disappointing that they were gonna kill him off, I also knew that the ship would not stop the battering ram so it was actually a relief that Rose did save him.

I think people dislike it for that reason though, they felt that Finn dying would’ve been a more shocking narrative turn and because Rose saved him she is to ‘blame’, I also believe that people didn’t like the relationship because Finn was clearly still on Rey and not everyone was on the Reylo boat or it got in the way of FinnPoe being more than just a bromance (side note, at the start of RoS I thought they were sailing on the ReyPoe for a moment, though I’m not mad about how they went), but again, that shouldn’t be the fault of Rose’s character. Rose clearly was inspired by Finn’s reputation and grew fond of his personality the more time she spent with him, likewise Finn found himself wanting to earn her esteem and taking care of her, it’s actually a shame that Rose’s role gets heavily reduced in RoS, because I do feel like Rose could’ve filled Jannah’s role (nothing against Jannah or Naomi Ackie of course) with the Canto Bight horse-things instead of the Kef Bir horse-things. So to conclude this section, Rose was good in this film, she served a purpose to grow Finn as a character and most constructive criticisms against her revolve around things either out of her control as a character or without would diminish her character role completely. The Communication Issue between Holdo and Poe Alright, let’s throw some hands up before I rub them together. I agree that Holdo should’ve told people the plan, I do dislike it when a movie creates conflict made by a lack of communication. But, he will say rubbing his hands together, this does not ruin the film. It’s worth reminding that Poe is recently demoted for reckless behaviour, the Resistance’s entire offensive fleet was destroyed due to Poe wanting to destroy one Dreadnought Ship. A reasonable punishment for Poe on his arc to realise that being a leader is more than just winning a battle, but more on that later. So Holdo comes in, new squadron she barely knows because she’s taking over for Leia, she has a plan that she and Leia know but are the only living members who know now. So why doesn’t she tell Poe? It’s quite simple, not only does the novel imply that she’s figuring out if there’s a mole - which is understandable because the First Order must’ve watched Star Trek: Into Darkness and thought ‘hey we could track ships in hyperspeed too!’ - but she’s also trying to enforce Leia’s punishment to Poe. Poe is in this shit because he refused to listen to orders, so Holdo is basically telling Poe to listen to orders, something he refuses to do and starts a mutiny. It is frustrating yes and we side with Poe because he’s the more familiar character, but had Poe just proved himself a trustworthy person who is learning from Leia’s last decree before she went into a coma she would’ve told him. This also transitions nicely into the next criticism people have Canto Bight and the Cryptographer Goose-Chase Poe’s plans of mutiny starts with sending Rose and Finn to Canto Bight, at the behest of the massively underused Maz Kanata, to find a Cryptographer so that they could disable the hyperspace tracker. People hate this scene mainly because it segue’s from the plot, it’s high on CGI and reminds them of the Prequel Trilogy

Now I can’t really contest the CGI but it was nothing bad, CGI still gets used well and the visit to the Casino aided in time for Rose and Finn to establish a relationship, have some lightheated BB-8 moments, introduce DJ the speech impediment ‘wrong hacker’ and continue to drive the shades of grey theme Finn is about to learn about. People never seem to criticize that they put their faith in the wrong guy because it leads to a more interesting conflict, so it’s strange that they hate this transition so much. The Brevity of Snoke and Phasma Two characters introduced that promised to be big deals were killed off in The Last Jedi, the nature of them both was a brave scene that many felt dropped the ball on these characters. And while I am inclined to agree on Phasma at least, Snoke’s death was actually a great turn. Before RoS we were none the wiser on who Snoke was, now we’ve seen it we know that he was basically a mass-produced puppet by the emperor...not the best of closures I’d admit but the anger towards Snoke being killed off is actually hypocritical ‘All Snoke does is sit in his chair and die’ You know who else sat in his chair and ‘died’, ol’ Sheev Palpatine. People are quick to criticize that Snoke was hyped up but barely got to show anything when Palpatine only really demonstrated the force twice in the Original trilogy before being thrown into a pit of apparent death, we allowed the Emperor a pass because we learned more about him through novels and future movies, and that’s something we eventually find out from Snoke as well.

Captain Phasma on the other hand was a sad disappointment, after one brush with death already she returned to basically be killed off again as a symbol of Finn shedding his ties as an ex-stormtrooper and embracing the role of a rebel. This is not really the fault of Johnson though, everyone seems to be more content with the alternate scene where Finn exposes Phasma’s actions for TFA, but that was a choice from the cutting room. While we can be disappointed that Phasma didn’t leave enough of a mark on the trilogy, we can always hope for prequel stuff as we had with Boba Fett, an equally wasted character in his main trilogy who could theoretically be in The Mandalorian (only a theory, nothing is concrete), but if we are willing to love the Original Trilogy despite similar issues we hate on TLJ for then aren’t we being hypocrites? tHaT’s nOt HoW tHe FoRcE wOrKs If you try to pick on Rian Johnson for ‘not getting Star Wars’ directly you would be in for a world of punishment. Two major force powers that get used in The Last Jedi is the ‘Force Skype’ and Force Projection, however both are basically using the same techniques, one is connecting minds while the other is connecting one mind to an individual place. It’s immediately told to us that this is an advanced technique but this is not something Johnson has made up. In the EU this ability is called Simifuturus or just Doppelganger, practiced by Luke, Dooku and Yarael Poof. Rey and Ben’s Force Skype is also used in the EU called Force Bond, Chain or Jedi Kinship, the ability had been fine in beloved Star Wars games Knights of the Old Republic I & II, the Clone Wars and Rebels series and aplenty of novels. For the legitimacy of these abilities cannot be contested. The fact that the ability kills Luke shouldn’t be criticized either, Luke is projecting himself light years away on Crait, with a copy of Han’s dice in a much more polished form, he physically interacts with Leia and takes on a barrage of AT-M6 blasters - turbolasers that can destroy speeders and ships with one hit - and two lightsaber slices, remember Ben felt the impact from Rey’s blaster on their first Force Skype, so Luke carried the feeling of all that damage and strain on his body and maintained his projection. So not only did Luke’s dying moments lead to an incredible display of using the Force but also one that forced him to sustain an immeasurable amount of damage and still manage to bide the resistance time to escape. Leia Poppins Ah yes, the Mary Poppins moment. I dunno how I can explain this one so easily but how about this. Leia is force sensitive, we have known this since Jedi, so to see Leia use the force was a massive moment, but she’s floating in the vacuum of space so there is no ‘up’ she is basically pulling a heavier object than herself in a vacuum, using it as an anchor so she can get to a blast door. As to why she survives in space, you can survive up to 2 minutes in space without a helmet, it is horribly painful though, it’s also worth reminding that Leia is not a human like you or me and if the Force can heal (as shown in The Mandalorian and RoS) then why can’t it keep Leia alive a bit longer in Space? She ends up in a coma anyway so I don’t see why complaints are rife here, she survives barely and it’s not like they knew Carrie was going to die sometime after the film was completed, they obviously had more plans for her so it would’ve been wrong to kill her off there when we were already killing Luke off. Did Disney Ruin Star Wars? This is a statement I’ve heard a lot in regards to TLJ, Solo and RoS, which is weird though, people were fine with Disney doing TFA, Rogue One and The Mandalorian, Mando’s journey with Baby Yoda proving that the utility of fanservice - something the trio get loathed for - can be enjoyable and it bodes well that the director of some episodes is doing an Obi Wan film. The phrase ‘Star Wars Fatigue’ also came about from post-Solo reviews, which I have expressed is dumb because MCU do 3 marvel movies minimum a year. But the reason Solo got low box office figures wasn’t because it was bad, it’s because it was released around the same time as Deadpool 2, it was left to the sharks without a chance to succeed. So no, Disney have not ruined Star Wars, if anything fan perception has damaged the franchise with people hating it because it’s not the Original Trilogy or it’s too much like the Original Trilogy, the same can be said for the EU. RoS is quite similar to Dark Empire but because Disney retconned most of the EU it’s the enemy, but let’s be honest, does anyone want the continuity to be that Chewie gets blown up? I doubt that. So WHY does The Last Jedi deserve more respect I think the mixed reviews of Rise of Skywalker has proved that maybe TLJ got a harsh end of a stick, even with Abrams’ vision back at the helm the film proved to be divisive and personally quite safe. This is probably why I liked TLJ the most, Johnson went to challenge things and build off of the previous movies as a whole, nothing really was safe, it took narrative risks that opened the door to a lot more things.

We explored Rey’s connection to the force and her desires for answers being unable to be sated by it because she’s expecting more from her level of learning, we also have Snoke’s gambit to bond Ben and Rey together to strengthen both, Ben strengthens into a more mature state but continues to conflict in a less whiny way, even relenting from trying to kill his mother. We also got some ‘reverse Jedi’ stuff with both Ben and Rey adamant that the other will turn but instead of turning one another, Ben’s hatred however proves too great for Rey to accompany him which leads to Ben getting a villain promotion to Supreme Leader. We have a solid arc for Finn, Luke and Poe as he finally learns to take care of others, because as Rose was saying, sacrificing yourself is not going to beat the First Order, heroes are great but dead heroes win nothing, protecting others is the essence of the Resistance and that’s what a leader is meant to do. Hell, we even get a little Hux stuff, the way he slowly considers shooting Kylo Ren while he’s down and his constant abuse culminating in the rather obvious RoS reveal that he’s the spy. Unlike RoS, TLJ thrived on giving every major character worthwhile arcs like these which all ended up entwining in the climactic showdown, while tertiary characters did end up getting underused there were still windows for them to do more in the next episode which was taken out of Johnson’s hands, but he laid a lot of groundwork for the story to be taken multiple directions, which is actually quite difficult when you’re midway through a trilogy and on the 8th outing of a saga. In addition, the film provided Hamill’s best performance as Luke Skywalker, giving him a fitting end to his journey which explored almost every dimension of a Jedi’s character; training, temptation, losing faith and redemption.

I also loved how Johnson described the Force in TLJ, it wasn’t about Dark or Light, the Force was the Force, an energy that flows through all that is harnessed by the force sensitive, even Force Ghosts. And using the Puppet Yoda was a great and fun addition, and it makes sense that he can fire lightning, because Force Ghosts are one with the Force, they flow with the flow of nature. We got lore and demonstration of great powers that made the ‘holy shit’ moment of Kylo Ren stopping a blaster shot mid-flow look like novice work. And while we’re talking about ‘holy shit’ moments

You cannot deny that TLJ had some absolutely breathtaking visuals, moments in this film are some of the best moments in Star Wars, a combination of intensity and hype from Luke’s standoff with the First Order to Holdo’s hyperspace ram, Ahch-To’s real-life setting was also beautiful as were the design of Crait from its Icicle foxes to its salt speeders leaving a red path of smoke

This film looks beautiful and the story is multilayered with character development, worldbuilding, good action and gutsy plot twists, you know everything people (rightfully) praise The Mandalorian for. It’s definitely not a film where you’d find yourself bored and when you set aside your fan theories and the illusion that the Original Trilogy was Flawless save for the Death Star plot hole you will find this movie a lot more enjoyable. Now I don’t want people saying it’s a ‘Don’t Question, Consume’ sorta thing, it’s a matter of accepting that there are flaws but not allowing it to ruin the experience, because The Last Jedi embodies a lot of the essence of Star Wars old and new, it is probably the best that the New Trilogy has provided and it is certainly worthy of respect.

[schmergo]

My Unified Theory of Mark Hamill’s Face

So, this is a totally unnecessary and lengthy post, but yesterday, I fell down a bit of a rabbit hole about Mark Hamill’s face and the difference in his appearance between the first two Star Wars movies. As you probably know, he was injured in a car accident after the filming of A New Hope, before the movie was released. It’s also said that the ice monster attack in Empire Strikes Back was created to explain the change in his face.

Reading up on it, it’s hard to find any concrete facts, with people on Reddit claiming that Mark Hamill’s accident was much more serious than anyone knew and that his whole face practically had to be reattached, versus this article that claims that his appearance didn’t change at all beyond episodes 4 and 5 beyond normal aging and mild weight gain. And I definitely do not agree with that statement. It’s clear that after the first movie, he has a flatter and slightly more asymmetrical nose, rounder eyes, some small but visible scars, especially over his top lip (which changes the movement of his lip). He doesn’t look BAD, just different.

But the article also points out many issues of time line with the excessive, overblown myth of Mark Hamill’s accident (he filmed another movie after A New Hope called Corvette Summer before his famously weird appearance in the Star Wars Christmas Special, which disproves the myth that the special was done right after the accident when he was high on pain meds) and that Mark Hamill had said he just fractured his nose and cheekbone.

I propose this is a case of “Everybody’s Right, Everybody’s Wrong.” Mark Hamill’s accident truly did only fracture his nose and cheekbone and got a few cuts on his face but those injuries still significantly changed his face, especially up close on screen. I think a lot of people don’t understand how facial fractures work.

I have seen firsthand (or at least second-hand) that a broken/fractured nose can really alter someone’s whole appearance. Someone I know very well fractured their nose when we were kids (in an accident in which I played a part) and the difference before and after was significant, especially when their face was still swollen and had two black eyes. No wonder Hamill would have said he thought his career was over when he saw his face after the accident. The swelling after hurting your nose is significant. When the person I knew recovered, they still looked just as adorable but their facial appearance was markedly different.

Your nose is in the center of your face and your ability to be recognized depends on the proportions of and distances between features. Because of that, changing your nose can change everything- trauma to the bridge changes distance between eyes, trauma to the tip changes distance between nose to mouth, changes to the width of the nose changes proportion to mouth and eyes, changes in height of the bridge/length of the tip changes the harmony of your profile. That’s why certain celebrities look so different after “just a nose job.” Often, it really is just a nose job.

Also, a study in JAMA Plastic Surgery shows that in up to 90% of the cases of surgery on a nose, the shape of the lip is changed as well and projects outward more. It wouldn’t surprise me if this happened in the reconstruction of Hamill’s nose and explains why his mouth seems different other than the scar.

The article I posted earlier claims that the change in the shape of his eyes was just due to aging and that there was never any record of injury to his eyes. The writer fails to realize that there WAS injury to his cheekbone.

Actually, several bones make up what we call the “cheekbone,” and that includes the orbital wall, orbital rim, and orbital floor among others. “Orbital” means eye socket.

It’s pretty likely that Hamill damaged some of these structures. Especially since-I’m about to get real technical here- but I’ve researched facial fractures before for writing (and again when I was terrified of fracturing my jaw after wisdom tooth surgery).

Blunt force trauma tends to create fractures along three different potential lines in the mid-face. These are called La Fort fractures.

It sounds like he probably had Type 2 or 3 based on the description of “nose and cheekbone.” In both cases, that affects the eye socket.

Now, onto Corvette Summer, the movie that the article thinks debunked the myth of his face having changed. Remember, this was filmed before the Star Wars Christmas Special or Empire Strikes Back. I agree that he’s healed in this film, but he DOES look different, despite what the article says. Hamill was tan in A New Hope and tans were trendy back then, but if you look at him in Corvette Summer, they’ve got him RIDICULOUSLY tan, probably to cover up his scars. And if you look at his nose, it had the same shape as in ESB, flatter, slightly asymmetrical, and with one nostril bigger than the other. It’s harder to tell with all the dark makeup. However, his haircut is similar to A New Hope. I do think the change in hairstyles in later Star Wars movies amplified the change in his face.

As for the infamous Star Wars Christmas Special, no, I don’t think he was high on pain pills or keeping it barely together while grievously injured. It’s just a bad movie with bad directing and acting. But his heavy makeup was horrible and incompetently applied, and most likely for the same reason as his heavy makeup in Corvette Summer. They’ve aggressively tried to contour his nose to make it look straighter and to minimize his left (our right) nostril. It did not work. It just draws more attention to his nose.

As for the attack at the beginning of ESB, George Lucas has said that it was always in the script before the accident, while Carrie Fisher and Hamill have said they built on his existing scars to create his fake imjuries. Why can’t both be true? The attack was always planned but the precise facial injuries were recreated to make it look more realistic and perhaps explain the difference in his face. But Lucas was right, it’s not weird for Luke Skywalker to have some scars after a few years of battles and adventures. It’s nothing compared to the scars his dad Anakin had.

I actually think Hamill’s scars have gotten more pronounced rather than less as he ages. That’s not uncommon. If you have scars, it affects the way your skin moves when you talk and smile, which means your wrinkles form asymmetrically. I have a faint scar on my forehead that affects the way my forehead moves around it and will probably affect the way wrinkles form as I age.

So if anyone ever brings up Mark Hamill’s mysterious accident and claims he had a face transplant or anything wacky, you can share my rather middle of the road common sense dissection of what really happened to his face!

[kindredsoulsoftimesofold]

Incoming TROS rant

yes, there will be spoilers as I will be breaking down everything I saw tonight. If I manage to type choking on my tears well after the movie finished.

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FINAL WARNING IF YOU DON’T WANT SPOILERS

Let’s start with a few opening words, this rant will indeed be a long one.

ALL THE LEAKS ARE TRUE. And I mean ALL of them. To a T. As soon as I saw the first half was exactly as I’d read, I was crushed. As I knew what was coming. On that note, i was probably the only person in the theatre who was crying like 15-20 minutes before we were supposed to, I’ll get to that in a bit. I’m saving the WORST for last. Let’s break this shit down.

1. The plot is a mess. An actual mess. I feel like every five minutes I was shaking my head and mumbling ‘what kind of nonsense is this’. The breaking of lore or COMMON SENSE really is substantial. But that is definitely not what I cared about, as I already KNEW this even without the leaks. When you can’t get your two directors to FUCKING WORK TOGETHER TO MAKE A COHESIVE STORYLINE it is bound to grasp for straws and make shit up. IT AIN’T NOTHING NEW.

2. Here’s the kicker. THE DIALOGUE WAS SO BAD, it makes Anakin’s AOTC speech seem like a hymn, or poetry or whatever. They CONSTANTLY say what they’re doing, they’re literally reciting the exposition to each other and it comes off as extremely annoying and makes you feel like a toddler. No hate against toddlers, but I’d rather not be one right now. It feels unnatural, forced and STUPID to the point where I would start WISHING for 3PO to come back on screen because Anthony Daniels somehow managed to snag some actually decent lines for once? I love the man, but the droid usually really annoys the crap outta me. He was literally the highlight of the film. Don’t get me started on the stupidity of all of Lando’s lines, poor Billy. Daisy has to stare angrily most of the time so I don’t really care to recall her lines. Adam, my dear Adam, he tries SO HARD to make do with what he was given but even his lines 90% of the time come off as stupid and out of place. Or the worst type in this movie, EXPOSITIONYY. Don’t get me started on Mark Hamill and Harrison Ford. Boys looked like they didn’t sign up for this shit and were literally force choked to be there. I feel you guys, I feel you. ALSO FOR THE LOVE OF THE FORCE THE TIMES THEY REPEATED WORD FOR WORD LINES FROM OTHER MOVIES I WANTED TO SCREAM. Once is too much, THIS MANY TIMES IT IS A FELONY. And it needs to be punished somehow.

3. Let’s get the positives out of the way because there were FEW. The two scenes I actually REALLY enjoyed watching, for different reasons were:

Ben and Palps meeting. The scene was much longer than the clip and SUPER badass. Sheev’s voice echoes, Ben looks fucking cool and the whole scene is GORGEOUS.

The other is when Ben fights as a Jedi in the end. I’ll get to Ben later BELIEVE ME but without overexplaining, he fights with Anakin’s lightsabre, he’s really speedy and is doing all the Jedi spins and whatnot. I fucking ATE THAT UP. Replay that scene forever please CAUSE I LOVED IT. But I was already crying here so we’ll touch more on that later.

To conclude this segment, the visuals were SUPERB, the sound was AMAZING and (some) of the fights were jaw droppingly cool. But that about concludes the positives!

4. I will comment, as I know a lot of people will care even if I don’t particularily. Finn, Poe, Rose and the merry gang aside from our Jedi are reduced to EH this movie. If you thought you’d never miss Rose boy were you wrong. They introduce new characters and expect you to care about them when they SIDELINED the ones they’d hoped you’d care about BEFORE. And it made me care about NO ONE. Not to mention that, sadly, they are ALWAYS reduced to the boring side plot that really isn’t interested or key to much of ANYTHING. Sure they roused the people and all but would’ve been TOAST if Rey didn’t go all Jesus on the fleet. So at the end of the day, you MAY find some enjoyment with the side characters but their lines were some of the worst, you WILL be force fed new people and you might not really enjoy your previous faves here because even I found myself being completely indifferent this time. (I actually really ENJOYED Finn since TFA. He had a compelling storyline and John Boyega was alright. Couldn’t give two wits about him in this movie. Not a single one. But again, I may not be the perfect person to ask if you really,really like any of these characters.

5. Finally, we have arrived to the main event. THE REYLO.

The backbone of this clusterfuck of a new trilogy. The last Skywalker and Palpatine, coming together instead of apart. The arguably BEST actors (legacies aside) Disney managed to get. Now, I will start this off that I didn’t HATE Rey before this movie. I loved her in TFA, enjoyed her less in TLJ but the novelization fixed that. I was BACK ON BOARD to be her number one stan. In this movie, I couldn’t STAND her. Her lines are basically the director walking you through things, her plotline was obviously made last minute so almost none of it makes sense,  I literally wanted to curl up and DIE from cringing so hard every time someone said ‘you’re a Palpatine’. I thought I was looking at a very expensive rendition of terrible fan fiction. (Not to diss fan fiction in any way, you guys will be my heroes after this catastrophe.) ‘Empress Palpatine’, COME THE FUCK ON AND GET OUT WITH THIS SHIT. Bring back crusty old Snoke for crying out loud! Or even HUX! Who got killed off in a second and had three lines of dialogue, not important I guess? Like a great many things I guess, JJ. But, EVEN Palpatine aside, it was great seeing him again and every scene he was in I got chills, who cares that it makes zero sense at this point. Back to reylo.

Ben. Ben Solo Organa Skywalker. The last hope. The final remnant of something I have loved FOREVER. I grew up with Star Wars, like many others just in a different, post prequel era and they are still my favourites. This might sound ridiculous but Star Wars was part of my heart, my happiness. It brought me joy to watch it, read it, fantasize about it and have it in my life when times were dark or miserable. It MEANT something to me, as I am sure many of you will agree. And Ben was part of that. He was part of something that MEANT something to all of us. He was the last line of the characters we all grew up with and loved. The GRANDSON of Anakin, my favourite character of all time. This was their chance to stop the trend that Loki’s death in IW and Daenerys’ death and turn and many others started and STOP killing people who did wrongs. PEOPLE can change, they can grow and they can learn. Hell, to not stray to far from this franchise REY has killed A LOT of people in this movie alone. She DECIMATES the room full of Palpatine’s followers and never blinks an eye. SHE NEARLY KILLS CHEWIE, DOES KILL BEN (for a minute) and SHE DOESN’T NEED TO DIE. Of course she doesn’t but BEN DOESN’T EITHER. After all that YOU JJ, YES YOU, show me that the LAST SKYWALKER has gone through, suffered, alone and frightened. I would’ve ENDED you if you’d suggested killing him off to me, EVER. He was your chance to do a reverse Vader, AS YOU CLAIMED YOU WOULD. To show a character can come back to the light and be worthy of it WITHOUT DYING. You even set it up as such, which is my next and CRUCIAL POINT.

I’ve been a reylo since 2015. Their dynamic has always been fascinating to me and beautiful. I LOVED all the moments in TLJ, LOVED THEM. In this one, every time they force bond (terrible dialogue aside, again) I was happy. I had a hope that she would bring him back from the darkness and he will keep her balanced. WELL, JJ, guess fuck me huh? And anyone with common sense and human decency. JUST WHEN you shove Ben’s turn in my face, you make him talk to Han, you make him strut in to fight alongside Rey in full Ben Solo Jedi mode, hair blown and casually dressed. It was when he runs onto Exegol that I started weeping. Because knowing that he dies as I did, it broke my heart how it was done. You give me the scene where he fights and you give me hope of what his future could’ve been if only you’d listened to reason and done what was supposed to be done. He is chucked into the pit, WHICH MIGHT I ADD WOULD’VE MADE ME MAD IF THAT WAS HIS END BUT WOULD’VE BEEN SOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN WHAT WE GOT, comes back. And now comes the scene that cemented this as the ABSOLUTE WORST insult to me as a fan, possible. Ben is heartbroken that Rey is dead, the moment is sad and he cradles her dead body and hugs her desperately. Which would’ve been a beautiful and GOOD DIFFERENT type of ending. Or rather not having her die at all and being NEAR her death and him saving her and both living happily ever after BUT NO. JJ AFTER THAT has her come back, smile happily when she sees it’s him, her love her hope and the other half of her SOUL literally (the diad or whatever it’s called is so rare that Palpatine was thrilled they’d formed such a bond, basically space soulmates), he has them kiss, then hold each other and smile at each other with genuine feeling of joy and belonging both of them had sought all their life AND THEN YANKS IT FROM UNDER YOU. The scene where Ben falls flat onto his back is quite comical and I couldn’t help but laugh in my misery and sobbing. Rey doesn’t even cry, we don’t even LINGER on his body or mourn him afterwards or even mention it or EVEN SEE her, THE PERSON WHO LITERALLY FOUND HER SOULMATE AND WAS SO HAPPY WHEN SHE KISSED HIM AND WAS LITERALLY SAVED BY HIM, but no guess that doesn’t require a scene, sure, fuck it LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE. The cheery music that plays up until the moment of his fall, YES THE FALL OF SKYWALKER MIND YOU NOT A FUCKING RISE, was an insult to every fan everyhwere, lifelong or recent or otherwise, it was a punch to the gut, a slap in the face and after this happened I no longer paid attention to the movie. I’d been crying for some time leading up to the moment, I knew what was coming and the execution only made it worse and a more desperate cry rather than only sad, I was hoping it wouldn’t happen somehow. I choked back tears until I finally got home and cried. One of the things which MEANT so much to me, was dead. I no longer have any doubts, that this was intentional. Look at Game of thrones, that was this year. It seemed intentional to make series stop, right? Everyone agrees. They wanted to finally bury the Skywalkers so they could make something unrelated? They kill off all the Skywalkers. Well guess what disney? YOU DIDN’T HAVE TO BRING THEM BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE, YOU MONEY HUNGRY PIECE OF SHIT. No one would have minded a new trilogy, with new characters doing NEW things. Why even drag the Skywalkers and the leagies into this if YOU DON’T WANT THEM HERE? All you got was millions of lifelong fans of the old movies who have already felt or are only now beginning to feel BETRAYED. I swear it disney, I don’t want to feel this misery again. You won’t take Star Wars away from me and the joy it brought me. I will without a care in the world dismiss this new trilogy as something completely separate from canon. You’ve killed your own fanbase. You could’ve had us but you LOST us. You dangled something we wanted in front of us for our money and then you ripped it apart.

If you are anything like me, anything like me at all and have loved SW for however long. if it MEANS ANYTHING TO YOU, I beg you not to see this movie or at the very least, pay for it. You WILL feel betrayed, insulted, heartbroken, devastated and miserable, as I am feeling right now. I was supposed to go see this movie another two times but i cannot and will not spend another CENT on a company that chooses to alienate me. Fine, have it your way. I’m done.

This concludes my rant as I am tired and upset. If I missed out on anything and you are interested in anything else, please do DM me or leave a comment :) We’re all in this together now, the reylos the antis the new fans and the old. We’re all in the same heartbreaking boat, I love you all. And I will love Star Wars. The REAL Star Wars forever. I wasn’t even sad the ‘FRANCHISE’ was ending because it wasn’t. It had ended a long, long time ago.

[tippitv]

Supernatural Recap: 14.03 “The Scar”

THEN!

Jack is really having a hard time since Lucifer stole his grace, essentially rendering him a very handsome but otherwise normal young human. Michael (in Dean) has been going around burning the eyes out of people as some kind of "experiment." Then somehow Dean ends up getting rid of Michael and the cap he was wearing. What??? I'm now realizing I've somehow skipped that episode. Oh well! Pressing on in ignorance!

NOW!

Dean returns to the bunker, riddled with anxiety. "Every time I think about it, it's like a nightmare," he says as Sam trails him. "I can't eat, I can't sleep... it's always just there watching!"

Is he talking about his recent ordeal of being possessed by an archangel? The very one he fought so hard against many a season ago? Of course not! He's talking about Sam's fluffy new beard! And he's still wearing his Michael clothes, so at most it's been a couple of hours and it makes no sense even by Wisecracking Dean standards to talk like it's been days.

Sam is worried. "You didn't talk a lot on the whole ride here," he says. He was coming up with complaints about your beard. Dean tries to play it off, saying he doesn't remember anything from his time possessed by Michael. "I'm just really happy to be home, he says," then sees the Bunker Bunch.

For some reason he's really puzzled by their presence. Or maybe he's surprised by how they seem to have settled in. Also, why didn't they go in through the front door? They must have come in through some back door. The rarely-seen garage entrance? I need to stop asking all these questions or I'll never finish. I'm only one-and-a-half minutes into this.

Only this ONE GUY notices that the person they've been looking for for WEEKS is now suddenly in their midst. Give him an award!

"Not Michael anymore," Dean says when he sees the guy looking wary. "Yeah, Chief told us," the guy says. THEN WHY WERE YOU TAKEN ABACK? No award for you.

Jack walks into the room and notices him right away. Give him that guy's trophy! His little face lights up. Then Castiel walks into the room and sees him and the orchestral strings swell with emotion. They say each other's names while staring holes into my TV screen.

Like... look. I'm actually pretty Destiel-neutral. I don't care a lot one way or the other if they get together, but I'm not immune to noticing when people try to burn each other's underpants off using nothing but their eyes.

Then Jack changes the subject before anyone can start fucking right there on the nearest table. "Where's Mary?" he asks. Sam awkwardly explains she and Bobby stayed back in Duluth to clean up what Michael did. Dean excuses himself to go take a shower.

Jack reveals that Nick is gone. Castiel explains further, but whatever. I'm just glad he's gone. Sam is understandably a little freaked out, but Cas is more concerned about whatever's going on with Dean. "Why would Michael just give up his vessel like that?" he wonders. Sam shakes his head.

Dean, alone in his bedroom, starts to undress, revealing a big new scar on his upper arm. It looks like a hipster mustache.

Cue the title card that will always remind me of the Target sign!

Dean brings his upper arm to the Winchester inner circle. Everyone wonders what could have hurt Michael like that. He wants Cas to probe the hot, moist depths of his memory to find out why he has a hipster mustache on his arm.

Flashes of images reveal some cloaked figure stabbing Michael-in-Dean with a spear tipped with a giant crab fork. Ah yes, it's Bad Kaia from the Unseen Dinosaur Universe who killed Original Flavor Kaia. I mean, we know her because we saw her face in the Wayward ep, but the Winchesters don't.

Meanwhile in South Dakota, Jody Mills gets a text from Claire updating her with what's been going on.

A moment later, she gets a call from the Winchesters to let her know Dean is back. Also to tell her that whoever killed Kaia came through the episiotomy in spacetime and might be in her neighborhood.

They describe Dean's mustache scar to her and it turns out she's been finding headless corpses with the same marks. She didn't think that was weird enough to call anyone back at the bunker? I mean, even if she thought they were human, it seems like a weird possibly culty thing. Jack wants to go with them to see Jody, but Dean puts the kibosh on that. Jack turns away, dejected and alone.

Suddenly, a subplot enters the bunker.

Someone named Jules brings in a teenage girl who's the victim of some kind of witchcraft. "Looks like an aging spell," Cas remarks because she has one wrinkled hand. Oh and there were apparently other victims but they didn't survive. He tries to heal her, but fails. "This might take a while," he says.

Dean wants to just scowl and drive fast, but Sam wants to talk. "We still have no idea why Michael let you go," he says. Maybe he's just seen the show's IMDB page and knows things have to sort of be back to "normal" so that the season can have its Fun Time 5th (sometimes 4th) episode!

They do the usual thing of Dean not wanting to talk about his feelings and Sam wanting him to talk about his feelings. A jangly guitar in the soundtrack plucks out a few mournful notes of Stoic Masculinity while we watch the muscles in Dean's jawline.

The Winchesters meet up with Jody in the middle of the woods. She catches them up with what's going on with the Wayward cast off-screen and pets Sam's beard like it's a playful kitten.

Jack packs up a bag, ready to leave the bunker behind, and places a note upon his bed. He's only a year old, so I'm kind of impressed he can write so legibly.

On his way out, he hears people in the infirmary and goes to check. It's Castiel and Jules with the winkly-handed teenager. "She's been enchanted," Cas explains. "Like Sleeping Beauty," Jack says, somewhat awed. But the witch's magic can't be healed because of Reasons, so Cas is looking up a spell Rowena recommended. Is she still off with Charlie on a road trip in the Southwest?

Cas notices Jack's backpack. "Are you going somewhere?" he asks. "Um... no," Jack replies. Cas makes a memeable face.

The Winchesters and Jody explore the lush coastal rain forest of South Dakota. It takes them all of five seconds to find one of those heads from the headless bodies. For some reason, it looks eerily like Mark Hamill circa Empire Strikes Back.

Oh there are three heads, arranged on pikes around the smoldering remnants of a campfire. Dean pokes around and finds vampire fangs on all of them, but Jody had Alex test the bodies and they didn't react to any of the normal vampire triggers.

While Dean examines the campfire, Alternate Kaia attacks him and the others with her crab fork spear. For some reason, she doesn't kill them but her hood falls back and they see her face for the first time.

Alternate Kaia makes an escape while everyone is too busy wondering how there can be another Kaia, even though duplicate characters are pretty common by now. They're all pretty sure she killed the OG version, though.

Back the bunker, Wrinkly Teen still has just the one hand that seems to be affected. She wakes up when Jack touches her hand. She looks over at Cas. "Is that your dad?" she asks. "One of them," Jack says. Do you think she assumes there's a two dads married to each other situation, or that there's a bio dad and adopted dad situation? The girl reveals her purpose as the subplot.

Parallellogirl says a witch took in her and two other girls, and even gave her a fancy pendant. Oh her wrinkles are spreading up her chest now. I feel like someone would have taken a look at that necklace and realized right away it's involved. She says the other girls withered and died the same as she's doing now.

In Sioux Falls, Sam somehow realizes that Michael sent the vampires after Alternate Kaia.  Oh I see... the same thing happened with werewolves in the previous episode and I missed it. Michael is making monsters with special immunities to their usual weaknesses. Werewolves are impervious to silver, vampires aren't affected by dead man's blood. Who knows what other monsters Michael has enhanced?

Back at the bunker, Cas and Jules try the reversing spell, but all they get is a burst of cool purple smoke. The subplot girl's wrinkles spread. She chokes for air. "Help," she gasps. Jack watches in horror and thinks about how useless he is.

Dean tromps ahead through the forest while Jody and Sam bring up the rear. Sam notices that Jody seems to be avoiding Claire's calls. She doesn't want to upset her with news of Kaia's killer. Off Sam's puzzled look, Jody explains, "First love strikes quick... and to lose it like that?" So, Kaia was a woman of color AND possibly a wlw. And imo, no, having an alternate version of her doesn't undo the Bury Your Gays trope although I do appreciate Berens at least trying to make things canon in this episode.

Dean catches up to Alternate Kaia outside a rustic cabin that looks like every rustic cabin, and punches her in the face to knock her out. His face makes this kind of scary, numb expression

When Alternate Kaia wakes up, they've got her tied up in the cabin. They talk about OG Kaia. "What I was to her, and what she was to me, you could never understand," Alternate Kaia says. She was trying to kill Claire when she killed Kaia instead. She says Michael has been sending monsters after her ever since she got here. Cut to three new monsters sniffing around her old campsite. Except for their teeth, they just look like they're trying to find the nearest Field & Stream store.

Oh the girl at the bunker is dead. Castiel covers her with a sheet. Jack's eyes well up with tears.

Suddenly, a thought occurs to Jack and he pulls back the sheet. "The witch... Where's her body?" he asks.

Back in South Dakota, the gang is trying to figure out what to do with Alternate Kaia. "We should bring her to the station," Jody says. "No, we need to break her right here and now," Dean argues. Sam is kind of horrified and confused. Alternate Kaia explains.

Dean wants her spear because it's the only thing that can hurt Michael as far as they know, and he's "willing to do whatever it takes."

Then he literally plants his boot between her tied, spread legs and kicks her chair several feet across the floor.

Look, I'm not opposed to characters doing ugly things when it makes sense but this is uglier than they probably intended.

Oh okay so the witch's body is in the (heretofore unseen??) bunker morgue. How did they not notice that she's wearing the exact same pendant as Subplot Girl?

Back to Dean as grabs Alternate Kaia by the front of her shirt and gets in her face. "Where is the spear?" he demands. Maybe it'd be less awful if he hadn't also bullied OG Kaia into opening the rift in the first place. She just smiles at him. This would be a super great time for Jody and/or Sam to pull him the fuck off her.

But we cut back to the morgue. Jack exposits about how the witch was sucking out the girls' youth. It seems blatantly obvious, but everyone else needed to be kinda off so that he could realize he's still useful.

Jack breaks the witch's pendant and some mysterious green life force floats back into Subplot Girl's corpse. It works! She's as good as new, or at least not dead or wrinkly anymore.

Alternate Kaia says Dean is just like Michael, using threats and violence. She saw what he did to OG Kaia when he got mad. "You're a dream walker, too," Sam surmises. She was connected to OG Kaia her whole life and saw what she saw. Although, if that's true, then she should have known that Claire wasn't a real threat to her and not tried to kill her.

Flashback to Michael making her the same offer he made everyone else.

She doesn't want to join his side or give him her spear, so fisticuffs ensue. That's when she stabs him like a cocktail olive and it apparently hurts him enough that he'd give up his jaunty cap. I mean his ideal vessel.

The Field & Stream monsters have found the cabin. "We only came for her, but I was never one to turn down a buffet," one of them says. Man, same. The fight gets underway. Even though they're superpowered monsters, they just barely have the upper hand with the Winchesters and Jody. Dean manages to get his gun out and shoots the leg of Alternate Kaia's chair. She frees herself.

"Now you're in trouble!" Dean laughs to the monsters. Alternate Kaia leaps out the nearest window. "Or not," Dean quips. Although it would serve him right for her to leave them to it, she returns a moment later and spears one of the monsters through the back of his head.

She's put her hood back up, too. Does the hood also have magic properties?? She kills the other two monsters in as many seconds, then whooshes her spear around like it's a prop in a dance number.

Sam sensibly points out that the monsters will keep chasing her as long as she has the spear, but she's not exactly going to trust them after all that. They should have just asked her what makes it special. Maybe they could make one of their own.

As everyone makes their way out of the woods, Dean starts, "Jody..." But she stops him. "You have nothing to apologize for." Well... okay. She's more worried about what she's going to tell Alex and Claire, and she's sorry she barely got to know OG Kaia before she died. "I just feel like I already lost, before I ever even began..."

Back at the bunker, Castiel and Jack have a heart-to-heart. Cas beams with pride and it's very sweet. "You proved you have the mind of a hunter, and the heart of a hunter." He invites Jack to go on a hunting trip with him.Jack reacts like someone just asked him if he wants to go to Disneyland.

But then he gets a little cough. He plays it off like it's just a cold, but we all know what it means when someone gets a little cough in fiction.

Yep, he's one romantic duet with Ewan McGregor away from an untimely death.

On the road home, Dean feels like he can finally open up about his feelings a little now that we're in the denouement of the episode. He says he put them all in danger today. He didn't want to think about what Michael had used him for. "I just wanted to race ahead, skip to the end of the story... where I take out the bad guy."

Dean says he remembers feeling like he was drowning while he was possessed. I can't help but compare it to his "Heaven and Hell" speech and how moving that one was. But you know how the saying goes. You either die young or you live long enough to die young again, and then you live long enough to die when you're middle-aged, and then you live long enough to be possessed by the villain, and then you make a similar speech to the one you made 10 years ago.

Jack is sitting alone in his room when another coughing fit hits. This one is worse. This time he coughs up blood into a tissue. Hm... What's that I hear?

So that's where we end the episode. Do you think Jack will die? Do you think Jack will die and come back? Reblog with your guesses below!

And now’s the self-promo time when I add my Ko-Fi link! (ko-fi.com/A4017DA)

These are some very desperate times for me, so if you have a few bucks to spare and you enjoyed this recap, I would very much appreciate any donation. I know it looks like I’ve received quite a few donations but those larger ones were me “donating” to myself with credit cards to pay bills that had to be paid from my bank.

I squeaked by on rent this month, but bills and groceries still gotta be paid for. Hit a real snag when several clients just refused to pay me for my work.

Or my Paypal address is btippi@gmail.com and if you send it as a gift - I think no fees are deducted from my end.

[sirfrogsworth]

Kelly Marie Tran is great. Rose is great.

I am thankful to see so many people supporting Kelly Marie Tran over the past few days. And while I agree it is important that people separate the actress from the role she played, I’m a little fed up with people trashing her character as well.

I keep seeing, “Her character was trash, but she’s okay as a person.”

I’m sorry, but that is not much better than just straight harassment. Actors often feel very connected to the roles they portray. And I think Kelly was very proud of her work. People think because they are calling a fictional character trash it is absolving them of hurting a real person. That is not always the case.

In some cases, maybe the actor was clearly doing something for a paycheck. Or if it's clear the actor wasn't enthused about the role to begin with, harsh criticism is probably not going to bother them that much.

But I think in this case, Kelly was honored to be a part of this and sunk everything she had into this portrayal. I don't see how she could not take it personally when people are this blatantly cruel about something she created.

Criticism is a nuanced thing. I understand that. But I think there is a way to talk about elements of a movie you disliked without shitting on the hard work people did. Kelly did a great job. She created a unique, interesting character. Rose was not trash. She was not some shoe-horned diversity hire. It was not some sinister SJW plot to push some agenda. It was merely the movie makers acknowledging that maybe in a universe with varied species of aliens mixed with humans, perhaps not all of those humans should be white folks. That’s not an agenda... that’s called common sense.

The Rose/Finn storyline was one of the weaker sections of the film. That is acknowledged by those of us who liked the movie. There are a few lines that didn’t work. There were some plot points that didn’t work. I feel like there are ways to say that without being like, “ROSE IS AWFUL AND TRASH AND RUINED EVERYTHING.” And even if someone feels that way, why not just put that in a blog post or in a tweet without directing it straight at Kelly? Why do you have to say that in her social media feed? Why is it important to put that in her instagram comments? ON EVERY SINGLE POST.

Why is it important that you take a dump in her front yard?

Kelly did her best with difficult material to bring a fully realized character to life and she deserves credit for her efforts. Saying the character was trash but the actress is fine is not good enough. Not in this case. Especially since these folks cannot let anything go after MONTHS. The unending torrent of comments still pour in daily. Mark Hamill can’t post a picture of his dog without some asshole saying, “Luke sucked in TLJ!”

YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE MOVIE. WE GET IT.

For months, the most toxic elements of the fandom have been bullying this woman because they were not perfectly catered to. I refuse to let them off the hook by a half measure.

So I say to everyone...

Kelly Marie Tran is great. Rose is great.

[kylorenpunk]

Do them all. Suffer as I did 😂

Bitch I told you this was our friendship. We force each other to answer all the questions. 

1. selfie

Well… I wasn’t dubbed Selfie Queen for nothing… 

This one is interesting bc I have zero makeup on. The most recent ones are too blurry. A lot of my fav selfies are full faces of makeup tho. 

2. what would you name your future kids?

I feel like that’s a decision for both parents but I really like the names Felicity, Isabella and Dimitri. Yes, all of them are names from various franchises I enjoyed throughout the years. Be glad I’m out of my phase where I thought Vladimir was a good name. 

3. do you miss anyone?

I miss all my friends I don’t get to see frequently. Love all of y’all and hope y’all are doing well in life! 

4. what are you looking forward to?

Fucking graduating. Jesus Christ it’s taken me five damn years. 

5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?

From my club it’s Chris, Yara and Josephine. Also my entire friend group from back home. Honestly I love my friends so much. 

6. is it hard for you to get over someone?

I feel like every situation is different so that’s a tough question to answer. 

7. what was your life like last year?

I honestly don’t remember much from December of last year. It was a good time though. 

8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?

I’m an emotional bitch. I’ll cry over anything. I cried over fucking Mulan the other day. 

9. who did you last see in person?

My parents and brother. Earlier in the day my club. 

10. are you good at hiding your feelings?

I’m shit at it. My face gives away everything. The other day my professor was going into her inspiration porn narrative and I just gave her a cold dead look the entire time. 

11. are you listening to music right now?

No but I have the Hamilton soundtrack stuck in my head right now since that’s what I was last listening to. If you haven’t heard it I highly suggest it. Man I wanna see it so badly. 

12. what is something you want right now?

Sleep but I’m trying not to throw off my sleep schedule right now and am waiting a bit before going to bed. I only got three hours of sleep last night so that’s fun. 

13. how do you feel right now?

Kinda tired. Relieved that I got two service projects in a row done today. It’s been a long weekend. 

14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?

My friend Sebastian hugged me when I dropped him off. I guess that counts. 

15. personality description

I’m a makeup loving nerd who enjoys sitting in pajamas watching anime and superheros as much as she enjoys swatching EVERY lipstick in Sephora. According to my friends I can’t go 5 seconds without mentioning how old I feel and my love for Dungeons and Dragons. I’m also an asshole. (Wow this sounds like a 12 year old writing this)

16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?

Yeah tons of times. It’s bitten me in the ass. Oh well live and learn I guess? 

17. opinion on insecurities.

Everyone has them? If they say they don’t then they are lying. Mine is mainly related to my appearance or how I speak. 

18. do you miss how thing were a year ago?

I miss how things were in the beginning of this year. It started off strong then kinda turned into a shit show. 

19. have you ever been to New York?

No but it’s my top thing on my bucket list. My friends and I are highly considering a trip. 

20. what is your favourite song at the moment?

Of all time: Get Low by Lil Jon 

Currently: “Told You So” by Little Mix (If you haven’t heard their new album I highly suggest it if you love girl groups that preach women empowerment) 

21. age and birthday?

22 - June 21st (She’s a Cancer)

22. description of crush.

I don’t have a hardcore crush right now. More like 5 second crushes that are over the second they do something I don’t like. 

Edit: Currently “celebrity?” crush is Nathan Sharp. I am seriously considering dropping $55 to see him at a convention this month. 

23. fear(s)

Heights, something terrible happening to my loved ones, wild snakes, and the usual common anxiety fears 

24. height

Five foot three inches. I’m short. Yes I know it’s not that short but tall people like to put me in the short category anyway. 

25. role model

My mom’s coworker who was my internship supervisor. She has a doctorate’s in what I want to do and is amazing at what she does. The amount of knowledge and experience that women has is incredible. She is also extremely funny and knows how to teach with a sense of humor which I appreciate. 

26. idol(s)

Celebrity idols? I don’t really idolize celebrities bc humans are humans and have flaws. 

27. things i hate

Immaturity, intolerance of differences, demeaning slurs, The Last Jedi, and the new Fantastic Beasts movie 

28. i’ll love you if…

Play with my hair, are kind to my friends and family, share common interests, show an interest in what I have to say, basically respect me and those close to me and we’re good 

29. favourite film(s)

Hairspray, High School Musical, The Greatest Showman, Stardust, The Harry Potter series, Avengers, Guardians of the Galaxy

30. favourite tv show(s)

Jane the Virgin, Naruto (fuck off I hate myself too ok), the first three seasons of Arrow before it turned to shit

31. 3 random facts

I’m not artistically talented but I genuinely enjoy makeup and creating looks

I have a nonverbal brother with autism and he’s my favorite person ever

I completely programmed my brother’s communication device by myself 

32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?

Now my friends are mainly girls but when I lived in Tampa 90% of my friends over there were guys (Hi Mason). I’m going to say that’s bc of us all playing video games in the Delta lounge (RIP Dirty D). But yeah now it’s mainly girls and 80% of my dude friends are gay. 

33. something you want to learn

Sign Language. Ice skating. Hairstyling. Fashion (I’m trying to be better about putting clothes together). Also I’m down to learn more about makeup and techniques 

34. most embarrassing moment

Either farting while doing an air guitar in front of my entire girl scout troop

or signing to my friend that I liked her friend at a party and his brother repeated what I had signed out loud in front of everyone

wait. No. When I F U C K E D  up in front a super hot guy while volunteering and then chose an 18 year old jock as my wingman. 18 year olds are dumbasses. Don’t use them as wingmen. Fuck you Khaled. 

35. favourite subject

In grade school I think it was English or History. It really all depended on the year. 

36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?

VISIT NEW YORK 

Hike the Smokey Mountains 

Visit Europe 

37. favourite actor/actress

Chris Evans (especially when he is trying to fight orange president on twitter) 

Also Mark Hamill is perfect 

38. favourite comedian(s)

I don’t watch comedians often. I guess the Fluffy guy? 

39. favourite sport(s)

The only time I give a shit about sports is when my university is undefeated or playing my first university in football. Or the soccer world cup if it’s on. However I appreciate the skill it takes to do a sport. 

40. favourite memory

San Antonio. It was my first time traveling without family and it was the greatest time. It was such a cool city 

41. relationship status 

Single - I take my sweet ass time 

42. favourite book(s)

Eragon (No, I haven’t finished the entire series. No, I don’t want spoilers bc I will do it eventually.) 

43. favourite song ever

“Get Low” by Lil Jon 

“Look Through My Eyes” by Phil Collins 

44. age you get mistaken for

Last year I got mistaken twice in a row within an hour for a middle schooler. I was 21 at at that time. During my internship one of the parents asked me if I had any kids. I’m either mistaken as a parent or as a 13-15 year old. There is no in between.  

45. how you found out about your idol

N/A since I don’t have an idol

46. what my last text message says

“lmao it’s alright” to Joey but the previous one is more funny “thankfully no one threw up this time” in regards to my friend’s party last night

47. turn ons

Well I aint about to talk about my sex life so let’s go with personality 

Common interests such as superheros or anime, charismatic, easy to get along with, common goals in life, cares about their loved ones, has passion, and someone I can hold an intellectual conversation with 

48. turn offs

rudeness, immaturity, inattentiveness, bad tempers, superiority complex, not being genuine, judging others, treating people like objects, and general lack of care for others or themselves

49. where i want to be right now

Back in the smokey mountains in a cabin watching movies and anime

50. favourite picture of your idol

N/A 

51. starsign

She’s an emotional Cancer

52. something i’m talented at

Apparently I’m good with kids      Makeup too I guess? 

53. 5 things that make me happy

friends, family, nerdy shit, makeup and Kakashi

54. something thats worrying me at the moment

Some shit happened last night that has me worried for some friends but I’m sure they’ll figure it out 

55. tumblr friends

A shit ton of y’all I know IRL. I won’t tag y’all bc that’s annoying af 

Joey’s my only internet friend @earthschampion (answer my text bitch) 

56. favourite food(s)

pasta, empanadas, crab rangoons, taziki sauce 

57. favourite animal(s)

Meerkats and koala bears

58. description of my best friend

K @burnitstronger: realest damn friend you will ever have. Will tell you how it is and provide never ending love and support. Never understands my dumbass shenanigans but loves me anyway. Love you boo 

J : Will also tell you how it is and forces you to watch Naruto and ruin your damn life. Will happily go with you to eat junk food after class. Will fight anyone who wrongs you and is def still plotting revenge on all my ex’s. Stans Loona

M: Will scream at you in Leo in a frightening but loving way. Has the best damn fashion sense I have ever seen. Is the friend that comes by when I need her to and brings a shit ton of snacks and love (J does this as well).

59. why i joined tumblr

I was bored on fourth of July in 2012 and my friends kept telling me that this website would be fun. Also the avengers “fandom” from back then 

60. ask me anything you want

I would say I’m sorry Mason but I enjoy making all my friends suffer. Make sure to give him a follow bc he’s cool. @masonjar828

[horrorgay]

Reylo is/has ruined the Sequels

Hot take: TLJ both story level and writer level used reylo to make every single character removed from their initial storyline and undercut any potentially meaningful representation, by pushing them to the far sides of the narrative to make room for a “Rey saves Ben Solo redemption” story. 

It also, in order to make Ben Solo a more #relatable soft boy, played the game of “but maybe Luke thought about killing him”.

A. To begin, here is a list of canonical TFA!Kylo actions:

Ruined Luke’s attempts at teaching children how to use the force

Contributed greatly to the creation of the New Genocidal Order, the First Order.

An Order which, by the way, takes literal babies and brainwashes them into soldiers that will commit their genocide without question. 

Ordered and contributed to the slaughter of an entire village of innocent people.

Tortured two of the three main characters on SCREEN, which caused them to scream in agony and sob because it was a painful torture. 

(Throughout the movie is clearly hostile towards Rey, even when talking about her to his fellow first order members)

Sent the orders to obliterate four (?) ENTIRE planets and oversaw it without even flinching

Tried to blow up Maz’s castle

Purposefully intimidated and stalked Rey through the forest, after which he held her VERY CLEARLY against her will with the force and brought his lightsaber inches away from her face before forcing her to pass out, carrying her away from her new loved ones to torture her on Starkiller Base. 

From there he is shown to be continuously destructive, exhibiting no anger control as he damages the things around him.

He kills Han, who reached out to him. Though he does seem to show regret, he shoves it aside because he wants to continue to grow as a powerful murderer.

In the forest fight, he shows no mercy or kindness to Rey and Finn. He is brutal as he fights them, and intends to kill Finn, seriously harming him in the process. He throws Rey against a tree with potentially lethal force. I wouldn’t say this scene is inherently EVIL as it is just 1v2 combat, but it does further display that they are clearly on OPPOSITE SIDES.

He then offers to teach Rey to use the dark side of the force (not explicitly stated but obviously in the same GENOCIDAL manner he’s been using it with the entire movie).

She slashes his face and leaves him to die, and then SOBS by Finn’s side, ready to die on Starkiller Base.

Rey, throughout the whole movie shows CLEAR disgust, fear, anger and bitterness was towards Kylo as he has been nothing but a monster. (You can SEE them in the gifset linked below.)

B. Here is the thing about The Last Jedi:

If they wanted to make Kylo a “redeemable character”* they should have done at least one of the following things, EVEN THOUGH it absolutley would not undo his actions in TFA

*Its not Rey’s fucking job to turn back time and make a genocidal monster turn back into 10 year old innocent Ben Solo

Build Snoke up as an even worse bad guy, and show how he reached out to Kylo while he stayed with Luke.

What they did in tlj: implied snoke had some reason in his turn to the dark side and then killed him halfway through the movie (after Kylo watched him torture Rey, mind you). This provided NO in movie backstory for Snoke or Kylo‘s turn and does not give the audience even an once of sympathy for Kylo.

No one likes it but reylos, but at least SHOW if Han and Leia had been incredibly neglectful of Kylo. It would be very OOC of Han and Leia though, so they didn’t. It also would not NEARLY be enough reason to excuse his murder lust and genocide. I remind you of the classic “Rey is raised by sand and Unkar Plutt, does not become murderer.” 

What they did in tlj: Basically ignored this entire subject. Sending Kylo to Luke, HIS UNCLE WHO LOVES HIM, is not nearly enough evidence or reason for redemption. Hell, they didn’t even directly address the fact that Kylo murdered Han A WEEK BEFORE THE MOVIE TAKES PLACE.

BARE MINIMUM: Show that he is actively remorseful of his previous actions. 

What they did in tlj: He hesitates shooting the bridge he knows Leia is on. He doesn’t call off the attack though, and it still is destroyed. That’s it. The rest of the movie is Kylo playing kicked puppy in front of Rey (bc of the Luke Incident). After the fight scene on the bridge, where Rey is hopeful (addressed later on) he will reject the first order, he says she could rule as the new first order by his side. When she rejects this, he spends the rest of the movie trying to obliterate the entire resistance (INCLUDING: Leia, Luke and Rey). Like he’s straight up even more wrathful and murderous than he was when the story began.

Conclusion: It doesn’t make sense at all that both inside the story, and out (with Lucas Film) Kylo can/should be redeemed. They didn’t write it into the story NEARLY WELL ENOUGH. And it is also tone deaf, considering the political climate. Imagine if everyone started cheering for Trump the under dog, “will he get his redemption story?”. 

C. AND NOW WE GET TO THE ACTUAL REYLO ASPECT.

In the beginning of the movie roughly a week after the events on Starkiller base, Rey shows clear anger and disgust towards Kylo. This part of the movie makes sense. She hates him for what he’s done. In her words: he’s a monster, and he has to pay for what he’s done. 

Kylo has been nothing but violent, malicious and invasive to both her and the people she loves (Finn, Han, Leia etc.). 

But then, inexplicably she starts calling him Ben Solo. Maybe this would make sense if she felt like he could be redeemed, but five minutes ago and the entire previous movie she thinks the exact opposite. 

Rey calling Kylo “Ben Solo” seems more than anything to be the writers of TLJ pandering the side of the audience that does want to see him redeemed still. Sure, whatever. It’s the beginning of the movie. Anything could happen. 

But as stated before in section B, any potential attempts to portray Kylo being redeemed in the plot are then neglected completely. Leaving us with Rey, who previously hated Kylo with every fiber of her being suddenly treating him like he’s soft and kind-hearted. It becomes OOC drivel, and detrimentally ruins the heart of Rey’s character. (It also fumbles Luke’s character in what apparently is his last movie, but that’s a whole other rant.) 

After the throne room, they go back to their original status of Hero vs Villain. Still, it doesn’t change the fact that the 45 minutes (more?) of the movie made No God Damn Sense, and was a series of severe fumbles in the narrative. 

D. WHY THIS HURTS THE REST OF THE NARRATIVE. 

Recall that in the year before 2015 and the years following up until the Last Jedi, that Lucas Film and Disney presented what was supposed to be the main good guys trio: Finn, Poe and Rey. 

Finn, played by John Boyega, is the Main Male Protagonist and Rey and Finn were mutually portrayed as love interests in TFA. It would seem fitting that he’d continue to be treated in such a manner. Except he CLEARLY wasn’t. For goodness sakes, the main trio STILL is not consciously in the same room as each other until the VERY end of the movie in a few-minute long scene. 

His storyline also has pretty racist issues. Rose was introduced to give a vague purpose to his storyline in TLJ, and even then SHE was OOC from star to finish. Rian Johnson did not take his time to write a meaningful story for the MALE LEAD. 

I love Poe to death, but he and Holdo’s story did not really work. From a purely common sense POV the story should not have gone down the way it did. From a less common sense view, and a more character based one, their storyline caused Poe to be OOC. The heavy handed white feminism looks bad. It made Poe look bad, even if what he did was reasonable. (More in depth explanations here and here.)

The narrative was given to Kylo, and to (OOC) Rey. Which WOULD HAVE BEEN NOT IDEAL BUT TOLERABLE if they’d actually given depth to Kylo’s story. But again the didn’t.

E. WHY LUCAS FILM SUCKS FOR LETTING THIS HAPPEN. 

Rian Johnson has been explicitly clear in his tweets and interviews that he wanted to focus on Kylo. He wanted to make him more human and relatable (regardless of whether or not he failed). 

He has been clear that he did not care or take into account what the cast thought of the story he was writing. 

(Ignoring Mark Hamill’s advice on the portrayal of Luke, pushing aside Daisy Ridley’s tears [which let’s be real, it’s fairly evident that she was upset because Finn and Rey had no story nor interactions, and Rey was turned into an OOC plot device].)

He had joked that he would have left Finn out of the story and in a coma. He also unabashedly romanticized Rey and Kylo’s actions, despite that being VERY VERY VERY VERY QUESTIONABLE. 

He teased FinnPoe in promos and events leading up to TLJ, and decided that if Finn and Poe were going to get a long and like each other, he might as well separate them too. 

The Last Jedi leaves any representation deeply flawed, sidelined or non-existent. It is not a movie for the everyone. It is a poorly written movie made for an audience I can’t even pinpoint, but certainty not for anyone who wanted to see themselves in a narrative in a positive way. 

Star Wars has always belonged to everyone. In 2015, the took a step forward to make it belong to everyone. But in 2017, Lucas Film moved backwards and made a movie that belonged to a specific group of people who idolize and romanticize white male violence. Once you pull down the paper thin smoke screen of supposed diversity, you’re left with a bad movie, and poorly assembled narrative about Kylo, at the expense of everyone: the audience, the cast, and the characters.

NOTES:

Feel free to reblog, and repost elsewhere, but please credit me. 

Please, feel free to expand upon what I said here.

I am going to make a gifset that highlights Kylo’s actions and Rey’s response through TLJ and TFA, as well as an additional set with Rey and Finn. I will link them here when I’m done.

DISCLAIMER: IDGAF IF YOU LIKE KYLO. It’s not a crime to like characters. It is a fucking crime to write an official star wars trilogy and center it around the garbage man stink boy at the expense of everyone else.

[sonfaro]

“Ha ha ha Video and audio I said you can accept because duh. Written not so much.”  Then we can discount every article Rian’s ever spoken for. “Likely clouded by the authors own opinion on the matter.”  Seemed to me the author was a Reylo. “Did you actually listen to the podcast? How many interviews from the actors have you seen them express these kind of feelings? And they’d post the clip of Daisy’s comments on Rey + Poe (Daisy’s eye roll tho) and not Reylo?“ The Reylo quote is a spoiler, Rey + Poe isn’t.  Again, common sense dude: what does Mtime gain with a fake interview? “ Until you can show me daisy, saying those words out of her own mouth. Then I will accept. That is all for now :)” Yeah, that’s dogma. “P.s There’s a video of Rian “It’s all in the movie” hit me up if you need help finding it. ;) There’s a podcast by Empire on soundcloud you can listen to.“ Show me.  -_- “And I find this video very suspicious indeed. I could talk a bit about why, but you’d think I’m too analytical... but it’s whatever. Someone with common sense would put that clip online. People would share the heck out it. Their website will be tons popular. Readers increased to 100x. But sadly for them (and for you) no such thing exists.“ People are already sharing the article. http://wemedia.ifeng.com/44100571/wemedia.shtml https://weibo.com/ttarticle/p/show?id=2309614194049069319771 I feel like you greatly misjudge how popular star wars is in china.  Hint: it’s not that popular. “People are talking, doubting its legitimacy.”  Foreign shippers are.  That’s about it. “Go on then. Defend yourself. Post the full video. This is what people are wanting to know...” Foreign shippers mtime doesn’t cater too do.  Native Chinese fans don’t require a full video. “ I don’t trust it at all.” Do you trust Mark Hamill? Because he’s confirmed the translation “sounds like something Daisy and I might have said”. https://twitter.com/HamillHimself/status/951971613322354688 “Even with the Rey and Poe ship comments from Daisy. They said she said it was “impossible”. Lies. She doesn’t say that...“ Not lies, translation differences.  Chinese and English aren’t related, so you have to get the gist.  Daisy doesn’t think ReyPoe is going to happen, ergo “impossible”.

[kingofthewilderwest]

Hello! I was wondering if you've seen The Last Jedi and if you have, any opinions on it. Thanks!

I have seen it! Thanks for asking! :) Heads up, in case people missed my first comment on it the day it came out, I don’t have an enthusiastic perspective toward The Last Jedi. I don’t dislike the film, but it also didn’t grip me. It’s “okay”. So for those of you who are looking for an excited buddy to scream with, I am not your person. But if you are looking at having a fun, thoughtful discussion about the pros and the cons of the film, I am happy to do so with you.

In truth, I think one of the things I enjoy most about the new Star Wars trilogy is the discussion coming out of them. I was at a party a few days ago where we all got into such a long, deep, fascinating, and passionate discussion that we had to pass around a key, and whoever held the key could talk, and everyone else had to listen; we all had that many opinions on it, and it was cool to hear. There were many things we agreed with, other things we didn’t, but everyone’s perspective in the conversation was uber cool. I love that. I love to discuss the new SW movies more than watch them!

I can’t go into every thought I have on the movie now, but I’m happy to share some overarching thoughts! Ya’ll are free to ask for more specifics or opinions on certain things with TLJ, of course! 

Note: there are spoilers in the commentary below!

Plot in TLJ

Personally for me I felt as though the plot were strangely scaffolded. Maybe I’ll alter my opinion following a second viewing. But what I felt was that the plot was more cartilaginous than something with good backbone. Rather than having sound structure, with clearly defining points, it had a strange flowing, river-like structure that didn’t altogether convince me.

There were also some unnecessarily long parts to the plot. I’ve seen this mentioned two billion and five hundred sixty three point four times already, but I do agree with it: the casino run with Finn and Rose, while having some charm, was unnecessarily long compared to how it needed to be told. Technically story-wise you could have cut about ninety percent of it and lost little of what needed to be overarchingly told. 

I also think the drama with Holdo was unnecessarily complicated and tangled. Simple communication could have solved three plot twists. While there is totally feasible reason to withhold information, the writers never demonstrated that reason, thus leaving it all contorted.

Another big plot gap is something people have talked about a lot: Snoke dying without us knowing anything about him. Some of my friends have talked about how this can have a deep philosophical meta meaning, how it illuminates that we as viewers expect villains and villains of a certain vein, and get caught off-guard when it doesn’t happen that way, etc. But personally for me I feel as though it’s shaky writing. Viewers shouldn’t come away with so little satisfaction about a character who was meant to be a contending force; if the viewers leave like that, it means the execution - whatever the intent - was unsuccessful.

So the truth is, Snoke died without us knowing ANYTHING about this character. Where did he come from? What were his motivations? What’s his background, his… anything? He’s just this vague villain bad Sith guy that Kylo has killed and that’s it. Is there more to this villain that we can show without getting into the books and extended universe material? They really should have given us more by this point in time in the story. They can rectify it through Episode XI, but at the moment, it’s shaky plot-writing ground. 

Originality of TLJ

One of the big criticisms of TFA (something I constructively criticized myself) was that it rehashed the plot of A New Hope. Lots of people now seem disjointed because TLJ seems so original - or at least, that’s what I’ve heard from many people. TLJ being more original was refreshing for me.

I would say that it is original enough and that is good. Nevertheless, it’s still not as out-in-the-blue as I’ve seen some other companions of mine claim. In both TLJ and Empire, we have: 1). A rebel base being cornered; rebels having to fight; rebels having to flee, 2). A powerful, Force-sensitive young individual seeking out a Jedi recluse for training and assistance, 3). That Force-sensitive individual receiving some training after resistance, but ultimately making choices the Master finds questionable, 4). Characters being chased by ship by their enemies while the good guys’ ship(s) are in poor quality and need repairs, fuel, etc., 5). The characters go to a well-to-do location to find someone to help them in their rebel efforts, but that assistant turns out to be a traitor and turn them in to the Empire/First Order, and…. yeah. There are still lots of parallels to be made between TLJ and Episode V.

Another thing one of my friends pointed out is that many audience members might feel confused because TLJ ends in an analogous point to not The Empire Strikes Back… but Return of the Jedi. For ROTJ is when Luke is tempted to join the Dark Side and Darth Vader kills his master. We see that parallel with Kylo Ren and Snoke and Rey. But if we’ve already had that big plot event from ROTJ in the middle chapter of the new series… what’s next? That could be a reason why many people are thrown off by what was done in Episode VIII.

But personally for me, the ending material in Episode VIII was the best. The three scenes that stand out to me are: 1). The silent moment, 2). Luke being a badass in front of Kylo, and 3). Kylo killing Snoke, Kylo and Rey fighting together, but Kylo stilling holding onto the Dark Side and taking Snoke’s position. Those were all good moments that I quite like.

Oh. And the visuals. I loved the visuals throughout the movie. Very aesthetically well-done film.

Characterization in TLJ

Characters ranged from really well-written to… the writers randomly flapping hands. 

Poe and Kylo Ren were great highlights to me. I found them to be very well-written, founded on good motivations and well-established character. I do feel as though Kylo Ren is one of the more complex characters, who has layers of reasons and emotions, so every decision he makes is well-founded with who he is. And every scene with Poe was one that I appreciated.

Rose was good and what they did with her writing-wise works, and technically you don’t need more background or anything with her… but I would have liked more. I have seen some criticisms on Rose and understand the validity of those; I moreof am saying that Rose as a character is written consistently, with fun personality, and with some fun interest. I liked her on screen. Sniffed out the romance plot a while away and don’t think it was necessary-necessary, but don’t mind it either, because of course that happened, like it does with every other movie out there.

Finn’s characterization was… like the last movie… very rough. Poorly defined. Haphazard. Inconsistent. Wild writer hands flapping willy nilly. John Boyega’s good acting covers that up as well as it can, and makes Finn “feel” like a consistent character. But if you actually look at his choices and motivations across the two films, there is very little pattern, rhyme, or reason to it. Finn is a nice character when you don’t analyze him, though, so I wish that they’d done a better job with his personality and personality arc. That character deserves to be written well.

Now. For Luke. I agree with Mark Hamill on this one. Luke’s characterization was given justification and reasoning, and I get what they were trying to do, but… I don’t think it works. One reason it doesn’t work is that Luke has already learned the lessons he was struggling with in TLJ: he was tested by Yoda for the Dark Side and failed, he saw that someone turned to the Dark could be restored, he saw that giving up would never lend good results, and on and on and on. These aren’t just lessons that he’d need to relearn, but things smashed into the core of Luke’s personality and philosophy and core. And Luke’s struggle is very obviously working against a lot of common sense, which Rey delivers in a few sentences, and then Luke starts being turned to being convinced (there is a slow turn for him, but still). And lots of this goes against most of what we know about Luke’s established character, even when we consider how peoples’ personalities and views change over time. Last.. Luke’s internal conflict felt very unrealistic for his age and maturity. That sort of struggle he was going through I’ve seen lots of people in their mid twenties already have a firm grasp and understanding of. I shouldn’t be out-wising Luke Skywalker. I’m twenty-five.

That said, Mark’s acting was altogether fun and compelling to watch. He delivered very well.

Overarching Opinion

Personally I never felt “caught up” in the excitement of the movie - not that there wasn’t action, but I couldn’t get invested enough to worry or be pulled in. There was never a point where I was grumpy or angry at the movie… just didn’t get dragged into the adventure. It’s one of those movies that I came out of feeling it was “okay” but not astounding. I don’t dislike the movie and I’m not in the wave of complainers or haters or anything. It’s just not something that clicked greatly with me. There were some scenes I quite liked, some elements I quite liked, and lots of things that I’ll always love to debate about. It’s just not the movie that was made-made for me.

[old-souldier]

Entry #1: Specter

(cw: death)

The arrow plunged in her chest and Jordan smiled before waking up.

She slowly opened her eyes. It was still before dawn, but she could just make out the slim fingers of early light approach.

Jordan let out a sigh and she groaned to sit up, nursing her stiff back. Her pillow was wet with sweat and her eyes crusted. She slowly stood, again letting out a noticeable grunt of effort and waddled to the bathroom.

In her mind she could still see the arrow pierce her. She shut her eyes and she felt it penetrate flesh. It wasn't the noise it makes when it hits a practice target. Not a  thunk  or fwap as it struck canvas or bales of straw. It was the wizzing near by. The light snapping sound of one winging her ears.  Thwump. A tree nearby

Thwump. A fresh corpse just ahead of her

Thunk. Right though the plates of the brigandine jacket she wore as she covered Jordan.

"Shit." Jordan muttered to no one as she drew water and placed it in the wash basin. She took up soap and washed her hands and her face. She bathed the night before but she felt like she could bathe again. But there wasn't enough time.

Almost twenty years ago, out of the Barracuda Knights, parents passed of old age, and trying to make it as a sellsword in the Twelveswood of all places. She found herself at an impasse with a woman Jordan was stunned by.

The Keeper girl was young but not much younger than she was and quite strong. Hilariously, she had thought Jordan was a lost child until she saw the axe. She had then drawn her bow on the Lalafell and held it at a full drawn for what had to have been almost half a bell.

They were at an impasse. Jordan made camp and offered her the warmth of a fire and some pemmican.

They talked. Jordan explained that she was there to speak to the matriarch on behalf of Gridania. The Keeper woman, Amh, was there to ward away trespassers.

They talked more. They found out how much they had in common. As fighters, misfits, and as women.

The next day they bagged two rabbits and some kudzu root. They sat next to each other. As that night's fire died down, they had kissed and slept together.

The next day, she would be dead.

Jordan checked the mirror, making sure her epaulets were straight. She wasn't speaking or presiding over the ceremonies, but she was somehow an officer. Promoted from the rank and file because she somehow hadn't had the sense to die yet.

Placing the stiff felt and leather hat on she left her house. Before making it to her chocobo, she spied a letter in the postbox. It was on lavender stationery addressed to "Mom"

Jordan paused. Sami had grown up to look a lot like her. I mean, of course, she's a Keeper too. And pretty tall for one. Never needed the stepladder to get to the top shelf. But her eyes, deep dark blue and the wild shock of pink hair. That was just like her mother. She never knew who the father was, but as far as Jordan understood, that wasn't really of much concern to anybody.

"Just hoping you're doing okay, mom. Larson and I are the same. Chuchuto asked me to teach an initiate class and Larson is having fun reading all the books attached to chains in the Thaumaturgy Guild.

Are you okay? I heard about the Wall and that you're all going to go in to fight.

Do you have to mom?Like, I know I don't write much and stuff, but are you gonna be okay?

Come visit when you can. I know you don't like Ul'dah, but I promise we'll go to a spa and I'll help you beat up any gross Dunesfolk sleazebag!

If you can't, write back so I know you're safe, okay?

Love you mom

Sami

"Damn it." Jordan said, feeling her vision grow glassy as she looked down at the patch of sunflowers by the front stoop. She took a second to compose herself before brushing a stray lock of grey-blue hair and, tucking the letter into a pocket, she got on her chocobo and she headed out.

The job was a trick. She thought she was there to open relations and she had tried to, though failing miserably, get the matriarch of the tribe to understand.

It was no longer a moot point once the Quiver to found and began summarily wiping them out. It had become crystal clear to Jordan she was a patsy as the dead piled up around her.

She felt the arrows whizz by her. She jerked her head violently as one arrow grazed her right ear. She tried to find cover but she was off guard and outnumbered.

A thwump as she heard an arrow hit the tree to her left. A thwump as an arrow had struck the already dead body of a boy, not even a man yet. She felt the next arrow would hit its mark and-

Thunk.

She turned back and saw her face. She was running alongside Jordan but now her steps slowed as the breath was sucked out of her lungs. In her arms, she was cradling a swaddled bundle.

The radiant blue eyes looking down at Jordan.

"Amh!" Jordan cried out. Amh stopped and after a second, handed the bundle to Jordan

"Run," Amh eked out trying to move quickly but losing the speed of her legs.

"But-"

"Go!"

Jordan hesitated, feeling her hands tingle, wanting to grab her axe. The bundle in her arms and, as Jordan looked up, Amh's insistent look cause her to pause. Jordan bit her lip in frustration before running off as far as her feet could carry and further along. Only stopping once she found sufficiently thick canopy and couldn't hear the movement of feet or Chocobo.

Riding into Limsa Lominsa, Jordan placed her bird in the stables and proceeded to the Aftcastle. The ceremony was due to start soon.

The speech was a bit overlong, by thalassocratic standards, but Jordan knew it was coming close to the end when the speaker said.

"I'd like you all to take a moment to think on those we have lost so that we may reflect on the grave task ahead and the reasons for which we take up arms."

In that silence Jordan thought of many names: Mom, Dad, Bluomwilf, Romaton, Sergeant Styrnskoefsyn, Frederic, Salulu, Hamil.

However Jordan saw clearly one face, with eyes so deep blue they were like the wine dark sea. She looked at her, almost as though asking what's taking her so long.

Jordan hoped she'd dream again of taking the arrow instead of her.

[danschkade]

PAGE x PAGE ANALYSIS-- BATMAN: GOTHAM ADVENTURES #1

PUBLISHED: DC Comics, June 1998

SCRIPT: TY Templeton

PENCILS: Rick Burchett

INKS: Terry Beatty

COLORS: Lee Loughridge

LETTERS: Tim Harkins

EDITORIAL: Darren Vincenzo

For the last couple weeks, the time I might have otherwise spent writing more Page x Page Analyses was instead spent writing, revising, and thumbnailing the first issue of a new series. If the winds stay southernly, I’ll have more to say about that soon -- but in the meantime, it’s got me thinking about what goes into making a successful first issue. Charged with introducing the cast and premises as well as telling an engaging money’s-worth story, they're tricky beasts, even when you’re dealing with established characters. Maybe even especially when you’re dealing with established characters. For kids. 

Such is the case with 1998′s BATMAN: GOTHAM ADVENTURES #1!

I looked at issue 17 of this series in the debut installment of this feature. Aside from writer Ty Templeton and penciler Rick Burchett, the same creative team was here at the beginning, and all of the same good qualities are in play: strong meat-and-potatoes storytelling, muscular use of color to set location and mood, clear, clean inking, and solid lettering that invisibly guides the reading flow. With its intelligent use of simple character-driven plotlines and dynamic visual direction, BATMAN: GOTHAM ADVENTURES #1 is a prime example of how to introduce new readers to a full, lived-in world -- even if that world has been on your TV since 1992, and in continuous publication since 1939.

BATMAN: GOTHAM ADVENTURES #1 and all characters contained therein are property of DC Comics, reproduced here solely for educational purposes.

***

PAGE ONE

We kick off our new Batman comic by having The Joker leaping straight at the reader as the entire Batfamily gives chase.

Why mess around if you don’t have to, y’know?

This is not, strictly speaking, a splash page. The inclusion of that little “With a price on his head!” panel to go along with the title is blatantly non-verisimilitudinous (meaning it explicitly breaks any illusion we have that what we’re seeing is real, immersive). I think this was a canny move; this issue is going to do some really tricky tone-juggling where the Joker is concerned, so starting out with these two very different deceptions of him right on the first page immediately lets us know what to expect. Lee Loughridge’s colors are on the job to keep this from being confusing, clearly placing the first panel in a different spacial and temporal plane than the main image. 

PAGE TWO

The first panel follows immediately from the opening page, establishing a nice fast pace of action. I love how the Batfam looks sort of like a flock of birds -- it’s a cool way to add a dynamic, distinctive element to what is essentially just a footchase. 

This whole sequence has particularly clear lines of motion, beginning with this page:

Having Batman point directly at the reader in the last panel is an effective way to snap off the action flow of the page, making it feel more three-dimensional than the simple zig-gag it would be otherwise. Side note: how great are those sharp silhouettes in panel three? Funky and distinctive, selling the force of the explosion while still letting us know who’s who. 

PAGE THREE

Lots of good stuff going on with this page. Again, the action continues directly from the previous page as Robin follows through on Batman’s order and saves a civilian from the falling debris. We get a nice little bit of characterization-through-action -- Robin is a good soldier, a capable superhero, and a wisecracker -- as well as demonstrating how the Batfamily is concerned with protecting the people of Gotham City just as much as they’re concerned with catching criminals. Seems pretty basic, but it’s surprising how often that simple mission statement gets lost in the shuffle of telling a new superhero story. 

See also how the space where the flaming debris land in panel two is along the same latitude as where the civilian was standing in panel one. The arc of Robin’s swing also passes through that same point. This is a helpful touch, showing us how narrowly she just avoided a fiery demise.

We do lose track of Batgirl for the rest of this scene, which could be considered a structural error in the script. 

Burchett makes sure we don't lose track of Batman and the Joker by turning them into there sharp, easily identifiable silhouettes, backlit by Loughridge’s  distinctive colors in the explosion and the screen. You really can’t miss them. Tim Harkins continues to help us out on the lettering front, drawing a line between Batman, the Joker, and Summer Glisan’s news report. The citizens below add to the general danger by making the city feel full of vulnerable citizens, as well as helping us get a sense for how high off the ground the action is.

PAGE FOUR

This is such a great way to get exposition across. Where an infodump like this can often kill a story’s momentum, the ongoing Batman/Joker fight keeps up the intensity of the scene in a way that really doesn’t take up all that much real estate on the page. This device also connects our main characters to the exposition by allowing the Joker to directly react to it. He really is a loathsome villain; Templeton’s script does a deft job of balancing out the goofy, whimsical elements of the Joker with the lethal. Too far one way and he’s just a clown who makes Batman look silly for having to contend with him -- too far the other and he’s a shrill, boring serial killer. 

More clean movement on this page:

Note how this layout draws our attention to the horrible rectus smile in panel three from two different directions; the action line from the previous panel as well as the Joker’s shaking fist, with Batman’s head in the bottom left corner pointing up to it for good measure. All conflicts in the issue derive from the fact that the Joker murdered this young man, so it’s very important that we absorb this image before we move on to the next page. 

PAGE FIVE

See, again, the great balancing act. The anti-bat spray and the giant inflatable glove are patently ridiculous, but when laid over the face of a father driven mad by grief, the clownish gadgets become salt in the wound. The reader really identifies with the father here; imagine if you lost the person you loved more than anyone in the world, and this prancing asshole is the one responsible. Even when you put a price on his head, he just laughs at you. Look how sinister he is in panel three. He’s the most killable man in the Gotham City, this guy. 

PAGE SIX

Man, how do you not read that first line in Mark Hamill’s voice? 

There’s a really interesting use of space here. The action takes place all around the edges of the page, giving the whole sequence this great sense of verticality -- even if there is a slight gaff in that Burchett and/or Beatty forgot to draw the Batline in panel four. That said, I do love the inclusion of the reporter and cameraman in that panel, giving the environment a nice sense of depth that emphasizes the splattery fate from which Batman just saved the Joker. 

The action, and with it the scene, ends in the left of the last panel. This leaves the city shot in the right on that panel to act as a sort of ‘pan away’ moment, creating a quiet beat without cluttering the page with another panel. It’s super effective. 

Something I forgot to address elsewhere: Burchett is always contrasting the rigid, unflappable Batman with the constant mugging of the Joker. This is largely down to Bruce Timm’s terrific character models, but Burchett is a sharp enough cartoonist to know how to stage them so those contrasts really land. 

See also: this great juxtaposition at the top of this page.

PAGE SEVEN

I’ve always loved this lady in the bottom corner. No analysis, just crushin’.

PAGE EIGHT

Weirdly enough, The Joker is our POV character for this page. Despite being a comic book tie-in to a very popular tv show, this is still technically the first time we’re seeing the Batcave in this comic book series, so Templeton and Burchett give us this nice spacious look at the pace. The Joker’s reaction helps sell it as an impressive space, even if he’s mostly just talking nonsense. Loughridge uses this scene to establish the cool teals and greens that will indicate Batman’s private environments from here on out, such as the cave or the inside of the Batmobile.

Cutting from the huge shot of the cave to the narrow horizontal final panel adds to the suddenness of Batman cuffing the Joker to the railing. 

“Awp!”

PAGE NINE

This is our introduction to Nightwing, so of course the wayward bad boy Batchild has to come screeching into the panel on his badass black motorcycle instead of just walking in like a normal person. Templeton and Burchett give Robin something to do by having him goof around on the railing, which avoids having the scene become just a bunch of people standing around in capes. See also: wringing a moment of tension out of Alfred’s introduction. I dig Batman’s snarl in the last panel -- the most emotion we’ve seen from him so far. Alfred being in danger will do that. 

 PAGE TEN

Burchett adds dynamism to panel one by tossing a dutch angle into the mix. It’s a smart move -- having a diving action like a tackle go directly towards or away from the reader can sometimes come across as static or just unclear. The dutch angle gives this panel enough energy to sell the action. 

Also, a rare continuity gaff: the stairway entrance has a doorjamb here, where on the previous page it’s just a rough opening in the cave wall. The Joker looks a little bit off to me as well -- could this have been one of the first pages Burchett drew in the new B:TAS style? It’s a pretty common practice for an artist on a new book to initially draw some pages from the middle of the issue, just to get a feel for the new project on some pages of lesser relative importance. When it comes to this specific page, of course, I’m purely speculating. 

Regardless, Robin looks excellent in panel four. 

PAGE ELEVEN

What a great page. This is the point at which the main plot splinters into its various subplots, emphasized by seeing all our players head off in their own directions in panel one. Batman hands the scene off to Batgirl in panel two, and in panel three we fully establish her as the new POV character for the Batcave scenes going forward. In the next panel, we see the rest of the Batfamily drive away on their various conveyances, the looming silhouette of the Joker’s handcuffed arm, and Batgirl herself in the midground between them, really selling how suddenly isolated she is. The last panel says it all -- even if he’s handcuffed and weaponless, no one wants to be alone in a room with the Joker. 

Here, we end the first act with all our plotlines well in play:

Batman and Robin try to crack the case Gordon has for them (which, if you were paying attention on page seven, you know involves The Riddler)

Nightwing on patrol, which will almost certainly involve...

All the Gothamites who’re scouring the streets looking for the big payday

Douglas Reid using all his wealth to get his revenge on the Joker

And Batgirl, guarding the man himself in the Batcave.

All of which will unfold over the remaining twenty seven (!) pages, each of which is as dense and active as what we’ve seen so far. 

There’s a lot to love about this comic, and I’ll be coming back to it in the weeks to come. But today, I just wanted to look at the opening pages of a comic that does an exceptional job of using a clever, character-driven premise to set up its world. 

***

You can get this entire issue -- for free! -- on Comixology, along with every other issue of GOTHAM ADVENTURES for, like, a buck or two apiece. 

For a couple of my own comic creator bona fides, check out WILL EISNER’S THE SPIRIT RETURNS and SAN HANNIBAL, and pre-order the trade collection for BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: GODS AND MONSTERS. 

Additional content can be found on my website, danschkade.com, as well as my twitter!

Be well, talk soon, etc

PREVIOUS PAGE x PAGE ANALYSES:

GANGBUSTER: SWING ANNA MISS 

MINI-ANALYSIS — FIRST SIGHTING: SUPERBOY

ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #69 (with Aud Koch)

THE SHADOW STRIKES! #13

PETER PARKER: SPIDER-MAN #13

BATMAN: GOTHAM ADVENTURES #17

[witwerlove]

OK, first thing’s first, so hyped for The Last Jedi. I have watched the trailer so many times today. I say we just skip the rest of the year and make it December. BECAUSE I NEED THAT MOVIE NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Second, there sadly was not as much Sam content today. Like nothing tbh. He did do an interview segment with Andi Gutierez and Vanessa Marshall this morning after The Last Jedi panel. Talking about the trailer and other SW related things and just being his nerd self. But the livestream cut it off so it’s pretty much gone forever (unless they actually upload the interviews and panels to the channel like last year). It sucks that the livestream cuts off pieces when it’s done streaming. And it loses like 2 hours worth. The only reason I got Sam’s snippet yesterday was because I downloaded what was left of the stream and his part was still there. But today’s is gone. And I’m so upset.

I’m sorry. I tried recording it, but my program screwed it up. And it totally sucks. But fingers crossed that they upload it to the channel. If not, it’s okay. There’s also the Schmoedown to look forward to to those who weren’t there. Very excited to watch that whenever it’ll be up on Collider.

Tomorrow is sure to be better because there’s the Rebels panel (which I’m holding out for him to be a part of it) and the Smuggler’s Revenge audio drama. And if Sam pops up on the livestream, I’ll be sure to record it. I’ll record everything he’s in just to be safe.

AND GUYS I STG IF SAM DOESN’T WEAR A STAR WARS SHIRT TOMORROW I’M DONE WITH HIM. I’M UNSTANNING. I’M SO DISAPPOINTED IN HIM BECAUSE IF PEOPLE AREN’T IN COSPLAY, THEY’RE PROBABLY WEARING A STAR WARS SHIRT. IT’S JUST COMMON SENSE. COME ON DUDE. GET WITH IT WITWER.

I’m joking about unstanning him. Obviously...XD

I hope those of you who are Star Wars fans enjoyed all the content from today. I think today’s panels were incredible. Especially Mark Hamill’s tribute to Carrie. I cried so much. It was so touching. The Heroines panel was amazing! I love all the focus on the female characters in Star Wars. Really looking forward to that new animated series, Forces of Destiny. And I kid you not, I will buy all those dolls (or at least Ahsoka and Rey). And of course, THE LAST JEDI! THE HYPE IS SO REAL. I hope we get to hear Sam talk about his reaction and thoughts on the trailer and his hopes for the movie.

One last thing, a special shoutout to my friend @podracing-on-lothal/@celtic-romulan who gets to meet Sam tomorrow! I’m so happy for you, Ann Marie! You are always so sweet and you deserve it so much. Hope you’re having the best time at Celebration. Have fun meeting Sam! Give him a big hug for me. You’re awesome! :D <33333

Anyways, I’m sorry for rambling. I’m just really happy. It’s been an awesome two days. And we still have 2 more to go! Lots of awesome stuff to come tomorrow. :D

I hope you’re all having an awesome weekend!