#many spoons
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Hope you don’t mind unsolicited kitty cat pictures of my new worm-beast! Forcibly reminding myself that randombred cats can look like anything and that this elongated fella I found living at the local zoo is not in fact an oriental-type/lemur hybrid.
I'll be honest, this is the first cat I've seen that could actually be a Balinese cross.
if you'd only shown me the first photo, I would have 100% believed that was a Balinese. the fur and body type are so specific. and then the last photo couldn't be a Balinese (because of the white spotting), but I'd still believe it was an Oriental Longhair.
it's only the second photo that made me go oh......that's not quite right.....that's not how that should look.........
so I'd say the possibilities are:
you found a cat that has coincidental similarities to a Balinese/Oriental (cool!! awesome cat! the breed had to get the traits from somewhere, makes sense!)
you found a badly bred Oriental Longhair with a wonky face (not likely, OLHs are rare and tend to have a more standardized show-type appearance)
you found a Balinese cross (cool!! awesome cat!)
in any case, they are very beautiful and I'm an admirer of their special white stripe.
#people have sent me sooooooo many photos of their supposed balinese/siamese crosses. and I have side-eyed all of them#because they've all just looked like pointed domestic shorthairs/longhairs#this is the first time I've been like oh 👀👀👀👀 wait a second 👀👀👀#I dunno though it could just be these specific photos making it look a certain way#take everything I say with a huge spoonful of salt
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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
Plain-text version:
Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".
Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"
And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".
Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.
At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.
So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!
P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!
Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!
Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.
#hlep#original#mental health#my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it#i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support#and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of#huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the#longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel#i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop
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i know not many people would want to read a 10,000 word article about the minecraft end poem and how the author, Julian Gough, was never fairly compensated for his work and has made it public domain.
But it's a very well-written and heartfelt read, and he makes it very clear that none of this is a cash-grab and despite the fact that he is essentially a starving artist in this capitalist society, he only mentions his financial struggles despite Minecraft's huge huge success at the bottom of this article and not in the tweets so as to not dilute his message.
Anyway, I just think it'd be cool if those who are able to could support him in some way whether it be subscribing to his substack or donating to his paypal (that's linked in the article, you can ctrl + F to find it easier), that's all.
#Edit: Please look at the article for his paypal and his substack!! most ppl are reblogging a version where i didnt mention it oh gosh#im not really. the kind of person to make posts like this and i dont have the spoons to make it look nice.#my tumblrs not that visible anyway so i guess it doesnt actually matter#i just think that understandably not many ppl would read through the entire article and it makes me so sad that even in the article#he talks about how badly he just wants to make art and not play the capitalism game and still he doesnt talk about needing support#on the platforms where it'd be most visible bc he doesnt WANT to play the capitalism game even if society dicates it and its meant to#be an act of LOVE and just. yeah.#minecraft#minecraft end poem#mineblr
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Where is Spoons... I cannot see her.....
#spoons#my cat#sorry to post so many cat pics lately#she is very notable to me#in everything she does
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Never will I stop with the steadfast notion that folks in the DPXDC fandom should interact with at least some form of canon DC media.
There are comics, tv shows, radio dramas both old and new, podcasts, movies, magazines, so much shit that intentionally avoiding the media is simply preventing yourself from spawning new ideas and gaining a new appreciation for a fandom that you’re already in.
The Superman Radio Show has episodes 11 minutes long. A lot of the TV shows don’t have episodes that surpass 30 minutes and most are nearly fully clipped on the official DC YouTube channel. The amount of fan made motion comics is astounding. The amount of fanmade animations is equally as incredible.
#bones rants#dpxdc#I’m so tired with this fandom basically inbreeding concepts until it dies because people refuse to look at DC and accept new pieces of media#on the media that they consumed. your choice!!!#I’m just so tired. if anyone responds to this with even a sentence review of a NEW piece of DC media that they saw ill write a prompt based-#as things that should be explored. I’ve been blocked by many folks bc of this notion and it BAFFLES me. how is consuming media-#such an absurd request? there’s such a bountiful amount of such cool characters to check out and I don’t even#have the energy to write them because I know that people ignore those prompts bc they don’t take the effort to look at new things#I know this because I’ve done it time and time again and still do my best to showcase new characters#the difference between batfam prompts and literally any other character prompts is staggering#it just makes me sad man. I’ve more than once posted reccomendations for DC media on my page#I’m spoon feeding it to people and they still slap the spoon away like I’m pretending broccoli is an airplane and they see the veggies#bones writes in the tags#bones speaks#danny phantom#dp x dc
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oh right, technically i sell t-shirts
i forgot about that
#holidays are coming up and it would make a terrible gift#that's the main selling point#anyways these exist and can be exchanged for legal tender#the cost is the listed price + the emotional expense of knowing that i am judging u#bc i am. i am judging u#why would u want this. why would u exchange currency for this#there are so many other things you could exchnage currency for instead#a grocery store shrimp platter for instance#with the nauseatingly red cocktail sauce that is SO much better than a t shirt any time#hmm chicken picatta at a local Italian Eatery perchance? i am. a big fan of anything picatta#oh oh i know! 3.6 POUNDS OF FRESH OKRA#FOR THE COST OF THIS FRIVOLOUS T SHIRT U COULD INSTEAD PURCHASE 3.6 POUNDS OF FRESH DELICIOUS OKRA#and then --hold on i have a recipe--and then what u do is#so it is basically sacrilege to suggest this but what u do is u skip the cornmeal entirely#my southern ancestors are shaking a wooden spoon at me right now but LISTEN. u skip. the gotdang. cornmeal#instead: wash chop and soak (for 10 min) the okra in a mixture of 1 egg to tblsp water#then coat in flour#THATS IT JUST FLOUR#No cornmeal. i am betraying my heritage rn but I'm RIGHT#coat in flour sprinkle liberally in S&P and FRY that suck in veg oil high heat#until crispy & brown & u hear your arteries clenching in apprehension#so. so yeah#that's what u should do instead of buying this shirt go fry the shit out of some okra#(but buy local and young & tender if u can bc the grocery store is full of old-and-therefore-super-stiff specimens#pro tip (aka grandma tip): if u can't chop okra smoothly with your normal cutting knife then it's too old and tough.#...i mean u probably CAN still fry the shit out of it I've certainly done that before it's just much less delicious#ANYWAY. anyway ANYWAY. shirt. okra. farmers market. that reminds me of a post i made back when we first started selling these dang shorts#shirts. shorts shorts. oh shit i should make a crop top option.#i. i don't Know How to make a crop top option#HUH . . . i need to lie down now and contemplate the constant and irreconcilable limitations of the human experience good night
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✨ Commission for @silverxstardust ✨
Taking a bit of a break from their studies to practice some dancing (and maybe study the soft glow of the candlelight on each other's faces instead 🥺)
Thank you so much for trusting me with your commission! Seriously the cutest scenario 😭💗
#im so sorry i haven't been around here and also to everyone that has sent super nice asks to my inbox about me and my art and Reprieve!!#been dealing with a loss in the family and visits and also leaving tomorrow for Japan#just haven't been able to be around or online or had many spoons to spare in between it all 😵💫 🙇🏻♀️❤️#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#sebastian sallow#hogwarts legacy mc#sebastian sallow x mc#blushy seb is best seb 😌💗#commissions#art commissions#celdraws#celerydays#hl#hl art
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GAME NIGHT
Last week's loser has to pay for this week's pizza, this week's loser has to pay for next week's pizza
#rvb#red vs blue#buckle in kids i have so many tags to ping#rvb tucker#rvb sarge#rvb junior#rvb donut#rvb locus#rvb caboose#rvb washington#rvb wash#rvb agent washington#rvb carolina#rvb agent carolina#rvb kai#rvb sister#rvb grif#rvb simmons#rvb huggins#rvb lopez#rvb doc#my art#batsy art#my head says include their alt tags but honestly i dont think i will fuck it#this has been pinging around since i finished the blue team bonding night i just havent had spoons for it til now#ENJOY THEM BC I SURE DO#donut teaching junior how to braid using locus is i think my personal fave but im biased#also it was ridiculously hard to find a transparent lens flare for huggins i had to cheese it w my own rings!! bonkers#carolina isnt allowed to play the competitive games#coop yes
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“You blued me while we were sleeping”
#the gasp i gasped#so does this mean link kissed rhett's neck while they were sleeping 👀#i have so many question#how did they get in each other's bed? 👀#link's hand on rhett's shoulder 🥹#and link being the big spoon#link neal#rhett mclaughlin#rhett and link#rhett and link's wonderhole
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buncha stuff + closeups of the ppt2 guys
other closeup things under the cut
#osc#object show community#inanimate insanity#ppt2#bfdi#hfjone#oh my god theres gonna be so many tags#airy hfjone#bot ii#fan ii#silverbrush#fireafy#silver spoon ii#paintbrush ii#firey bfdi#leafy bfdi#paper ii#test tube ii#chainsaw ppt2#journal ppt2#mr hand ppt2#suitcase ii#my doodles
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Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them
#UTDR#UTMV#Cross Sans#Killer Sans#Kross ship#(Kinda. It's up to interpretation)#Long post#I'm so sorry I didn't mean for it to be THIS much#I started this like a week ago -A-#Lies down and lets out a long howl it's finisheeeeeed#I could have just drawn them spooning and written the rest but noooo I love to do things the hard way#Anyway I think they should be bed buddies#The company helps Cross relax enough to sleep and the touch helps knock Killer out#Cross has to be big spoon because otherwise Killer's soul gets squished and it's too uncomfortable to sleep#Also I realised Cross and Nightmare are the only two in the castle who didn't have knock knock jokes in their backstory#I like to imagine Nightmare has had similar confusing interactions with at least one of them#Cross probably spends the rest of the day panicked that he overstepped a boundary or the others will make fun of him#Not realising that Dust and Horror have fallen asleep together many times#Or that Killer hasn't slept properly in weeks and he's in heaven#I'm NOT drawing a follow up so just imagine Killer coming to Cross's room the next night and finding every excuse to stay#Because he wants it to happen again but he has no idea how to ask (and also Cross seems kinda awkward about it)#Absolutely terrified that I spent my whole week off working on this and it might be not that great so I hope at least one person likes this
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^real things grian has said in s6
#these are all just off the top of my head#there are so many more#i dont think the proposal one is exactly right? but i know he made many “proposing to mumbo” jokes#bc...yknow.....he wanted to propose the idea of architechs#but hes grian so he has to make it as gay as possible#spoon doodles#grian#hermitshipping#grumbo
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Nerdanel. It's been too long since I drew a red-headed elf!
#tolkien#the silmarillion#nerdanel#feanorians#house of feanor#MY GIRL#I have so many ideas#and not enough spoons lol#I have a couple of other drawings planned#even some russingon#i hope i get around to it#my art
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(thinking really hard) um... ryou and yugi in those illuminati era outfits
#and...maybe tkb in mana's outfit...........................#i was having a really hard time finding any clear pictures of kami's outfit so this is just my closest approximation#my art#yugioh#ygo#ryou bakura#yugi mutou#yugi mutoh#yugi moto#bro has too many god damn spellings#i meant to have this done sunday pm and then i ran out of spoons :P so good#scheduling this to post at the right time so now i have to pace around in circles until i burn a hole in the ground for the next 4 hrs <3#also thought i am way overdue for a drawing of bakura just being silly and happy. i want him and yugi 2 be silly happy goth besties togethe
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I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol
#wax seal#crafts#wax stamp#stationery#Window one is kind of stinky.. I was imagining like a swirly night sky sort of looking thing so it would be a surreal contrast of a night#sky with a window in the middle that shows a daytime sky - but the silver and purple wax kind of mixed too much together#with the black and it just looks very plain black and not all that starry or anything hjbhj.. Of course the eye is probably my favorite#since all I ever do is draw eyes and still like eye imagery for some reason. The four leaf clover is very lumpy and skrunkty but also it wa#the smallest in size out of all of them so was easier to do multiple stamps of just to try it out.#The heart with eyes wax is actually more swirly in person. I wanted it to be a mix of light pink and red and white. and the wax#did kind of all blend together but in person you can definitely see MORE of the intentional swirlyness. in this it just looks plain pink.#I was going to do one eye in the heart but it looked weird. but now two seems too plain. i could have done 3?? in a pattern.. hmm#alas. I wish I could make actual metal ones. With the clay i have to paint them in a thin layer of olive oil before stamping because#otherwise the wax just kind of gets stuck in the grooves of the clay and then you can't pull it up. Very wacky ''unprofessional'' looking#set up where I'm hot gluing circles of sculpey clay to short stumps of a wooden dowel that I sawed apart with a serrated bread knife#and then using an old paintbrush to put olive oil on them whilst holding a spoon over a yankee candle flame hjbjh#ANYWAY.. I think if I were middle class/rich/etc. this would be one of the main things in my crafting room is like.. SO many colors#of wax. and all different custom made stamps designed by me. which could be much more elaborate in actual metal.. muahaha.... >:)c#RHGghhh... I actually don't want to talk much about it since (this is probably just my Obsessed With My Own World Artist Delusions) I#think I have a really cool idea for a game that could genuinely be successful if i ever get to make it and I don't want to give#everything away and spoil the whole plot/concept in hopes that one day I can actually do it - BUT - a game that I'd like to make after the#visual novel I'm making now has partially to do with the main character working as a sort of writer/scribe/artist assistant in an elven#city (set in my world/with my worldbuilding species and versions of elves and etc) and I was thinking of maybe incorporating#somehow being able to collect little writing type items like these like.. you can get different wax seal patterns or pens or etc. when I do#stuff like this in Real Life it always makes me think of that like.. ouh... this is good research.. what it shall be like to be a littol#elf collecting wax seals and such.. indeed... GRR i need to be finished with my current game NOWWW... i MUST work on other#thingss... aughh... ANYWAY.. yay. accomplishment to do One Single Thing other than Sit In The Summer Heat And Rot#though also hilarious as this was the first cool-ish day that was below 80F in a while hgvh#waking up like 'wow.. i actually feel okay today?? like I could do things?? how mysterious.. I wonder why..?? :0'' Its The Weather You Fool#Tis Always The Weather
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