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chelseypprimrose · 1 year ago

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I Dare You / Negan X Reader / pre apocalypse

Summary: A game of drunken truth or dare turns into the best sex of your life.

Warnings ⚠️: daddy kink, unprotected sex/rough sex, choking, oral, spitting, slight voyerism, slight dumbification and use of degrading terms (slut ect) bfd!negan, age gap

As always, all respective parties are over age of consent ect. 🤍 *Not proof read yet*

A/N: whelp here we are again, i started rewatching the walking dead from season 7 and tell me why I had totally forgot that Negan cleans out Alexandria’s houses just to burn their mattresses right down the road from them, the more I watch the more I remember how evil he really was and it makes me giggle and kick my feet i can’t lie lol. Enjoy this little depraved story, I’m just loving writing stories where the reader is very fully aware of someone watching/walking in bc it’s just so dirty I can’t freaking cope 😂love ya’s and my requests are open as always 🤍🎀🧟‍♂️

Straightening out your dress, you walked through the wooden gate at the side of your friends house, the loud thumping beats of music and chatter blaring through your eardrums. You held a bottle of Smirnoff in your other hand, remembering the teaching from your mother about never showing up to a party empty handed, that was considered rude and insulting.

You’d left the party girl lifestyle behind, having your fun in your early twenties but mellowing out in the last year or so, finding more enjoyment in a cup of tea and a good book. Not to the extent of being anti-social, just cutting off bad habits and rethinking where you wanted to take your life. Coming fresh out college filled you with a sense of doubt and confusion, you studied heavy, dedicating your time to educating yourself but hadn’t yet found what you wanted to be in the world. No matter how much you were freaking out about your next step, you couldn’t miss your friend’s birthday party, so you’d decided to have some fun and let loose, deal with reality tomorrow instead.

Pushing those dreaded thoughts underneath the surface, plastering a smile on your face as you entered the already crowded back garden of your best friend, Natalie. You’d known Natalie for years now, exact number you couldn’t remember but through high school and many ups and downs, you’d always stayed close, spending nearly every weekend at her house. That was with her mother though, she’d recently moved in with her dad, due to domestic arguments with her mother getting too toxic. You’d only ever seen her dad twice in your life, normally when he’d pick her up after the various extra curricular activities you two enrolled in together. Negan.

Such a unique name, you’d thought when you first laid your eyes on him. How anyone could give him up would be a mystery to you, from your limited interactions he’d always been sweet to you. Offering to drop you home as well but always denying, not wanting him to drive out of his route just for you. Those polished, pearly teeth gleaming at you when he asked, practically making you melt right there on the spot. You’d cursed yourself for manifesting a little crush on the man, who was your best friends dad, the forbidden attraction. The way he’d sit lazily in the driver side, his large hands gripping the steering wheel, your mind wandering to thoughts of what they would be like gripped around your dainty neck. The black bikers jacket he’d always wear even in scorching temperatures, fitting his frame just right.

“Hey hey girl, how are you?” She wrapped you into a affectionate hug, her candy sweet scent hitting your nostrils, her birthday tiara shining in the sun’s beam. You reciprocated, giving a small squeeze as you released her, holding the bottle out to her. “Happy birthday, Nat. It’s been too long!” You replied as she took the bottle out of your hands, thanking you for the gift. “Come on let me get you a drink and we can catch up!” She lead you through the crowd of people, a mixed bag, some young and some old. You recognised some familiar faces from growing up, giving a small nod at those who recognised you, commenting small hellos.

Natalie motioned for you to take a seat at the rattan sofa lounger, near the side of the backyard porch, a small fire pit in the middle, keeping you toasty as your dress was a little shorter than you were used to. Negan entered through the same gate you’d come through minutes ago, returning with a crate of beer from the garage. He fought his way through the crowd, handing out the liquor to those he’d promised it too. Small ‘thank you’s in acceptance, placing the remaining bottles into a cooler with ice. Wiping his hands off with a small towel, fingers slightly numb from handling the ice, his eyes moved around the yard, silently cursing his daughter for inviting so many people to this place. His annoyance came to a halt when his eyes locked onto you, recognising your face in the sea of people. Watching you laugh with Natalie over old pictures she was showcasing to you, he’d know your laugh from a mile away.

He couldn’t help the heat that ran through his body, his jeans getting tighter as he watched your chest rising, your arms placed in front of you, making your breasts press together firmly, slight cleavage coming into show for him to memorise. You’d definitely grown up since the last time he’d seen you, taking a beer out for himself, he started sauntering over to you, discreetly adjusting himself on the way.

“Well if that isn’t who I think it is? It’s been ages doll!” He exclaimed, your head whipping around to meet his gaze. He looked similar to how he did when you’d last seen him, the only major difference being his beard being thicker and slight whiteness now peaking out of it. “Hey! Mr Smith, it’s nice to see you after all this time!” You almost purred, he loved the way that name sounded rolling off your pretty lips, that familiar heat rising to his cheeks slightly. While it sounded completely innocent to everyone around, he could tell the difference. “Oh why so formal? Call me Negan, we’re all friends here.” He grinned, those familiar pearly whites coming into view as he swiped his tongue along his lower lip lightly. “Are you ladies okay for drinks?” Natalie waved her dad off, claiming they were fine, he took his leave but not before taking one last gaze over your body, your curves almost putting him under some witchcraft spell.

It was later in the evening, the sun setting over the horizon, you’d been roped into playing a game of ‘Truth or Dare’ under the suggestion of Natalie, it being the game you played at all those sleepovers you’d had with her back in the day. You were sat with a few other girls, ones you’d recognised from high school. You weren’t best friends with any of them, not knowing them well like you did Natalie, just more so the fact they were the only girls left at the party.

You’d played it safe up to this point, only choosing truth, you decided to throw caution to the wind when your next turn came, proclaiming dare to the group.

Natalie’s eyes found yours, you could practically see the cogs turning inside her head, it got you wondering what her depraved mind was going to come up with. “I dare you to… seduce my dad.” You almost spat your drink out, eyes widening at the request, palms hot with embarrassment. “What? You actually want me to do that? Are you insane?!” You asked, a confused look sat on your face. “Not to be rude but… you aren’t his type at all, so it’s a guaranteed point for me! I’m just being strategic!” She claimed, her eyes meeting yours, goading you to back down. Your heart sank at the confession, you couldn’t understand why it stung so much, it was just a little silly crush but you’d be lying to yourself if you didn’t admit this new information made you feel a bit low. Your hurt feeling started slowly turning to slight rage, still watching Natalie as she challenged you with her eyes.

“Okay, how about we make this interesting though? $100 suit you?” You smirked, pulling a hundred dollar bill out of your purse, waving it in her face, mocking her. She returned your smirk, that goddamn egotistical smirk she got from her father, her manicured hand coming out in front of her to offer a handshake to seal the deal. “You are on, sister. You have to bring something back to the table that’s his, it’s the only way I’ll believe you.” You raised from the couch, slamming your empty cup down on the small table, taking your hair clip out, hair falling to the top of your back in loose, bouncy pin up curls. The girls watched you walk through the patio doors, sliding it to let you in before continuing on with the game.

You got into the kitchen, a few people standing around in conversations, you politely asked one of them if they had seen the man you were seeking out, answering that he’d gone up to his bedroom to change shirts, alcohol being split on him about five minutes ago. Making your way to the top floor of the house, you started trying doors, having absolutely no clue which one was his as you’d never been in the house before. You came to the last one at the end of the landing, being met with the very man you wanted to see.

There he was, shirtless in front of you, his room rather large. A four poster bed in the centre of it, black and red silk sheets with matching puffy pillows, a small door which lead into a en-suite, two bookshelves at the sides of the bed, small circle led lights above the headboard. He threw the wet t-shirt he’d taken off into the wicker laundry basket, not yet noticing that you’d entered the room. “Mr Smith? Sorry for not knocking, I need to speak to you about something.” You mumbled, the anxiety of what you were about to ask him gaining on you. He slightly jumped, a flirty grin on his face when he realised it was you who was there. You took a seat in the leather loveseat, matching the bed sheets, red and black were obviously his favourites. Your hands nervously played with the hem of your dress, his eyes wandering to your delicate fingers. “I’m all ears doll, ask away!” He says, turning his back to you as he found another t-shirt to change into, you opened your mouth to talk, nervousness managing to stop you in your tracks.

He turned back around, his face contorting into a confused look, wondering what you be needing to ask that would get you so worked up like this. “So Natalie dared me to… seduce you in our game of truth or dare. I had every intention to give it my best shot but she told me I’m not your type. W-which is fine, but I kind of bet $100 on it. Is there any chance you could give me something out of this room that I can take down to prove I did it, without actually doing it?” You awkwardly explained, your eyes not being able to meet his, if they had you would have seen the shimmer in his eyes as you cutely fumbled over your words out of embarrassment. He let out a large laugh, your face squirming, if his daughters confession made you feel bad, this was ten times worse. You felt a small tear gathering at the bottom of your eye, wanting the earth to swallow you in this moment.

It was the touch on your knee that made you look up, meeting his gaze as he knelt down to come to face level with you, Negan hadn’t bothered to put another shirt on, the low light of the room landing on his body just right, your core feeling slightly slick as his muscles tensed deep. You thought he was about to make fun of you for such a childish request, when he grabbed your chin firmly, making your head stay in position it was, looking into his eyes, not having the nerve to look away.

“Now doll, please tell me why you’d ever listen to such a fucking stupid thing like that?” He questioned, his thumb tracing your jawline slightly, still holding your chin in place. Your ears perked up, the total opposite of what you thought he was going to say coming out. “Uh, I’m not sure?” You replied, your voice not coming out as confident as you would have liked, that smirk still on his face. He was enjoying watching you squirm underneath him, his hand let go of your chin, hooking either hand around the underside of your thighs, pulling you slightly forward so your ass was half on the chair and half off. “How about I do you one better? Why don’t we actually complete the dare, huh doll? I don’t know why she’d say some crazy shit like that, probably hasn’t been paying attention to how I haven’t taken my goddamn eyes off you all night. You’ve really grown into a fine ass woman, you know that right?” You let out a slight moan, the feeling of his large hands keeping your legs spread open for him to see making your whole body electric. A vision of white panties peaking out under your dress, your new position on the seat making it rise up to your waist. “Thanks for the compliment Negan, but if… if you don’t touch me right now, I’m going to lose my mind.” You managed to make out, in broken breaths, your chest rising heavily up and down as you did, eyes wandering to his abdomen.

“Your wish is my command, pretty girl. Just relax and let daddy take care of you.” He whispered lustfully as his fingertips moved your panties to the side, showing your ever wetting slick pussy to him. He had to take a sharp breath in, nothing he’d seen was a prettier sight that this, hadn’t even imagined you looking this good, exceeding his wet dreams. He gathered saliva in his mouth, a powerful spit right on the centre of you, you whimpering in response at the degrading and dirty action. “Well, look at that! Someone likes a bit of domination doesn’t she?” He proclaimed to you, he couldn’t believe his fucking luck. You gasped as he finally took your clit into his mouth, sucking on it softly, teasing you with his devilish tongue.

He moves back to your pussy where he runs his tongue over your wet lips. You let out a deep guttural groan, as you grab large pieces of his slicked back hair, tugging him slightly, guiding him to all the places, you needed attention on. Negan continued to lick long strips down from your sensitive bud to your opening, listening to your moans and whimpers as he did. “Fu-fuck Negan! Yes, your making me feel so good.” He took his tongue of you, whining at the loss of contact. A darker look shifted on his face, more pressure as his hand dug further into your thighs. “Listen here, dollface. Tonight I’m not Negan, tonight I am daddy, you get that? Or has my tongue already made that pretty little head of yours blank?” He growled out, his tone completely like nothing you’d ever heard him sound like before, you’d truly woken the beast inside this man and you couldn’t wait for the journey. “Yes, yes, I’m sorry daddy, please put your tongue back on me, it makes me feel so fucking good!” He sinisterly grinned at you, parting your folds again and letting your juices flow down onto his tongue. He finds himself vigorously tongue fucking you as you begin gyrating on the chair, trying to push your hips into his face more, nothing mattering to you more than the pleasure he was providing, while pulling his hair with your fingers.

As he begins sucking your clit, he works a couple of fingers deep into your pussy, finding how tight you clamped around him, trying to intensify your pleasure. Negan begins to alternate between licking and sucking your clit, as you became more and more impassioned. It isn't long before you thrusted your pussy hard against his face, his beard scratching against you as your first climax washed over you, your hips bucking even more, back arched, your arms that were holding you up shaking.

“Fuck, daddy, I need you inside me now, please!” You whined, Negan hoisting you up off the now wet chair, the slick shining sun in the light of the room. He slammed your body on the bed, your head hanging off the edge of the bed, the blood rushing to your ears. “Goddamn doll, this pretty little pussy is going to be the death of me, pull that top down, I want to see those tits bounce as I fuck you dumb.” You obeyed, pulling your breasts out of your dress, the style of dress restricting you from wearing a bra, cupping them and rubbing your nipples as well. He could have bust right there and then, the image of you below him, looking like something out of a damn Playboy magazine.

He trails kisses up your body, tasting the thin layer of sweat on your skin until he reaches your mouth where he kisses your lips deeply, snaking his tongue into your mouth as he lined up at your entrance, rubbing his dick up and down your folds, setting your whole body on fire, nerves standing on edge. He releases your mouth, moving to your neck, nipping and biting at it as he finally stretched you out, filling you up nicely.

“That’s it doll, fuck. You feel goddamn heavenly, such a good slut for my dick right?” He grunts out, leaning away from your neck to hover over you as he put his hands around your throat, his pace getting more erratic, unable to control himself from his hard thrusts as your skin slapped together. Your head was starting to go dizzy, between being upside down and your oxygen being slowly cut by Negan’s large hand, it intensified your impending orgasm. Negan pulled out quickly, turning you over from your back to your stomach, forcing your back to arch as much as you could, slipping back into you. The new angle sent you nearly cock drunk, Negan too mesmerised watching his dick going in and out of you, not noticing the door slowly opening slightly.

You looked over to see Natalie looking on at you and her father, like time had stopped in place. You couldn’t see her whole face, just her eyes. Frozen, she made no move to say anything or close the door. You smirked at her, your eyes not breaking eye contact. “Oh daddy! You fuck me so good, my pussy belongs to you!” You moaned, a narcissistic grin sitting happily on your mouth. “Shit yeah doll, this pussy is all fucking mine you dumb whore.” His hand coming down in your hair, his other placed around your neck again. Hips snapping repeatedly against you at a now familiar pace, a moan leaving you every time he snapped. You raised yourself up on your elbows, repeatedly rubbing your thumb over the tips of your index finger and middle finger, the universal sign for Pay Me. Her eyes squinted in anger, closing the door again, not wanting to see anything else and now pissed she owed you money.

You quietly laughed to yourself as quietly as you could, feeling your walls clamp on Negan’s dick as you were ready to orgasm. “Fuck daddy, I’m going to cum again!” You whimpered, gripping the silk sheets below you both, Negan shallowly grunting above you. “Shit doll, me too. Let go for me baby, milk daddy’s dick doll.” You squeezed the bed sheet again, your whole body shaking as you closed your eyes, breathing irregular as you flopped forward on the bed, panting heavy. Negan pulled out at just the right moment, hot spurts of his cum hitting your lower back, cooling off after a couple seconds sat there. He carefully placed himself next to you, pulling you towards him so you rested in his arm. “I’ve been waiting for that for years, you know?” You told him, your fingers slowly drawing small circles on his forearm. “Could have told me sooner doll, that was fucking sen-sat-ional! You are perfect.” You laughed, kissing the side of his face, leaving a small nip at his ear lobe.

Two orgasms and $100 richer, it was worth leaving the house after all.

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themoonchildwhofell · 6 months ago

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all my ghosts

pairing: Farleigh Start x reader

content/warnings: fluff (im so sorry guys), pretty fast paced lol

summary: HC of a healthy farleigh x reader relationship (thank fucking god)

note: really wanted to write farleigh finding a nice partner that helps him with his trauma lol. possibly post saltburn. I'm so sorry my dudes. I really am a sucker for fluff! still based off of a Lizzy Mcalpine song.

"'Cause I hate all of my habits but I happen to love you."

Farleigh met you at a 7/11 near the place he works at. He's pretty bummed about not having to go to Oxford as well as fully disconnecting from the old life he had.

It was exactly July 11th. He remembered because you got a free slurpie at the convenient store.

You looked good for someone who was staying up due to an exam. You finally decided to claim that free slurpie they had since sugar wakes you up.

Farleigh, on the other hand, was just exploring the place. He didn't really want to stay at his mum's place. So he decided to get his own place.

He didn't really want to go out that night. It was a not-so-impulsive decision due to the fact that his case of cigarettes were all out.

The fluorescent lights weren't really giving you justice. As well as the bags under your eyes but who cares? You really need to pass this math exam tomorrow.

He approached you being the extrovert that he is and asked for your name and number. His excuse was to tour him around since it was his first time back at the States. (he was already living there for 3 weeks)

You agreed to tour him around. Praying that he wasn't a murderer of some sort.

You two went out the very next day to "tour" him around. At the end of the day, he did ask if this was a date.

"No. But maybe we can set a proper one?" you suggested.

He liked that. It means he gets to see you again.

Months pass and you both seem to connect really well.

The relationship progresses to you both being a couple.

Everything felt great. There was the usual fights, of course. I mean Farleigh is kind of a diva. You expected him to be annoying at times.

But most of the time, he's the loveliest.

It's the same with Farleigh as well. He loves your company. You make him feel good and sane. Especially after all the loss he experienced.

There are times that he feels like you're too good for him especially with all the baggage he has. All the trauma from Saltburn and his cousins passing.

These trauma did manifest some bad habits that he's actively fighting. But it helps him when he thinks that he might have a lot of ghosts with him haunting every piece of him left in Saltburn; He still has you.

Dates with him are always unpredictable. You both tried to do cocktails once at his apartment but failed. You both decided to just drink the wine and eat all the fruit.

You also tried cooking. Which was fun and messy. But the mac and cheese was good. He was really convinced that he could make a better mac and cheese than Gordon Ramsey. You giggled at how adorable he was and agreed. That night ended in a sink full of dirty dishes, slow dancing to Master & A Hound by Gregory Alan Isakov and tiny sweet kisses.

Sometimes, you both try clubbing. But end up going home early to just drink at home and watch some movie or have sex.

You both tried to finish two bottles of brandy one time.

"You really think you can beat me at drinking?" Farleigh smirked.

"Fuck! I'm 3 shots deep, my boy. And I feel sober." You we're not. You both didn't finish the bottles of brandy. And he had to carry you to bed.

"You know... I'm pretty drunk right now. But I really love you, Farleigh. You and all your ghosts." You passed out right after. He did say he loved you too. But he'll probably just repeat it once you both are sober. That was the first time you both said I love you.

You had the realization that you'd want to spend the rest of your life with him one Saturday morning. You both we're on the couch watching Bluey. You made him watch Bluey because at first he didn't want to since it's a kids show. But he saw the one episode with Chili and it really stuck with him.

He was laughing at a particular scene when he said. "I think we're like them. Chili and Bandit."

You stared at him. "Yeah. I guess so." It kinda dawned on you how compatible you both are. How you can live like this for the rest of your life.

He had the realization that he wanted to marry you the time you we're at his mom's home celebrating Christmas. You were helping with decorating the tree. He decided to quickly grab the star at the top of the cupboard in the hallway. While going back to the living room, he saw you sweaty, with your tongue out and concentrating on placing the lights on the tree. He realized he has never felt happier than that exact moment. He would love to spend every christmas decorating trees with you.

#archie madekwe #farleigh start x reader #farleigh start #farleigh x reader #farleigh saltburn

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bomberqueen17 · 7 months ago

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quick turnaround

The first chicken processing day is this coming tuesday. so we got back into town around 7pm last night, and I immediately put a load of laundry in.

This is mostly me wittering about chores and medical stuff, so, cut for boring, LOL.

it's cold and rainy here so I hung last night's laundry up on drying racks in the guest room, so mostly it is dry this morning-- delicates, so they didn't need to dry in the sun really-- and now this morning i've put in a second load and it's already on drying racks and some is on the line, it's not raining but it's cloudy so it'll dry slow, but like, trousers and t-shirts do better on the line than on racks. Yes I do own a dryer-- a gas dryer actually-- but it beats the fuck out of my clothes and I don't like to use it if I can in any way avoid it. (Mostly I use it to tumble towels and dress shirts for fifteen minutes, and then I hang them out once they're steaming and hot, and they dry without wrinkles that way. Yes I'm on the OCD spectrum, yes it mostly manifests about laundry. Hilariously, my farm BIL is also on the OCD spectrum, farther along it toward where it's actually a problem [mine is SO mild I don't claim it as a disorder at all, i just have things i Care About for Reasons], and has done tons of work on himself and tries to mask it, but once I understood that about him I understood that most of our lil workplace quarrels were our compulsions clashing, so I started making more concerted efforts to decide when to bow to his compulsions and when to advocate for mine, which in many cases are informed by superior knowledge as I've worked in food service more than him. I bow to him more on cleaning now because he does have prior janitorial experience. Unless I can prove he's wrong, LOL.)

I went off Ritalin mostly while on vacation-- I took it the morning I went fabric shopping because I thought it might help me actually make decisions, and that went well so maybe it worked. But that means I have extra pills, so I'm going to try to today take a morning and midday dose, while I have So Much To Do to prepare for the coming couple of weeks, and see if that plus the structure of this massive to-do list help me get anywhere. I just feel like if I can have this data before my next $300 3-minute psych consult I'll make more progress. Ritalin is better than Adderall (less brutal comedown, less getting "stuck")-- I *think*, but it's hard to tell. Vyvanse was also very hard to evaluate, is the problem, because that one I never did have any spare pills so I could never try an effective dose.

I do get it, i do get not giving me high doses when I'm so unsupervised, but-- for all of the medications, the first couple of days were weird and I had trouble hydrating and I was jittery and stuff, but it went away so quickly, I would have been fine with "take half dose two days, then ramp up to effective dose and see how it works" type directions, instead of "take what we know absolutely will be too little for you for two weeks and then come back and try to guess whether it helped", which has just meant I don't really have much data to on on here.

But. I've spent almost forty years needing this kind of medication and not able to access it at all, so I'm reminding myself that this is very rapid progress really.

So I figure I'll do a double dose today, a single tomorrow while I'm driving (maybe I will take that sole dose at midday, since driving is easy and boring but then I have work I need to get done all afternoon), and then I'll try either single or double dosing for the week of farm work until I can get my next appointment, depending how many pills I have. I want to be consistent but lol. It's not in my nature and it's not in my circumstances, so it can be a goal.

I also should write down what I realized about my sciatic nerve. I was joking that my knee caught a haunting in New Orleans somehow. Because it went from being a classic sciatic nerve pain situation-- starting in hip, through back of leg, ending at back of knee-- and wound up just being this horrible pinching pain right inside my knee, like not in the joint but somehow manifesting in a dimension extending from the back of my patella into Hell somehow-- and it was keeping me awake both when trying to nap during the day and also at night when trying to sleep. So I gave up on sleeping and sat on the couch to bitch about it in the complaints channel on the Discord where I'm mostly at home (it was a witcher server and over the last two or three years has mutated into just this ragtag group of us bitching about unrelated things and occasionally dumping fanworks on each other, sometimes about unrelated media)--

but here I'm gonna let you in on a secret, which is that complaining works sometimes. What? Yes. So in order to elicit maximal sympathy from my pocket friends by describing the problem really well (they're very good pocket friends, and many of them know things so describing stuff well sometimes means they have good advice, but even if not, I take satisfaction in communicating well, so I at least feel better about having done that), I really started paying attention to the pain, and I realized that what was happening was that it was sort of slowly throbbing on a cycle. I always knew where it was, but then it would get painful enough that I felt I had to move and change position, and it would stay at that level of pain for three or four seconds, and then taper off until I only just was aware of it, and then it would repeat-- and it was on a thirteen-to-fifteen-second cycle, and this is the crucial thing, it was unaffected by movement. I had been tossing and turning because what would happen was that it hurt badly enough that I felt I had to move it, and I would move and the pain would ease, and I would try to settle into a position, and then the pain would come back, and my half-asleep exhausted self thought that it was something I was doing. So it meant I was constantly moving, which meant I could not sleep. I had finally gotten out of bed and was alternating stretching and pacing, which seemed to be helping but then it was coming back, and the pacing sure as fuck wasn't helping me sleep, and I couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong, until finally I stood still and timed it, and then moved and timed it, and realized it was the same.

Realizing that it was happening regardless of movement made me able to hold still while it hurt most acutely, and then sure enough it faded away. And once I knew that moving wouldn't help, I could ride out the urge to move. And once I wasn't constantly trying to find a comfortable position, I could rest. And once I was resting, I could fall asleep. Because this is the annoying thing-- the pain wasn't that bad, even. It's not the agony it has been in the past. I could move through it, easily. It was just too much to hold still through, until I realized that was what I needed to be doing.

So anyway-- traveling home it was mostly fine, it does not like standing in lines, and mostly i sat as much as possible, which isn't good for me long-term but i know over the next couple of weeks i will be doing a shitton of walking and standing so. we'll figure out tactics then.

so along with the ritalin i will be working out my ideal regimens of ibuprofen, aleve, and weed, LOL. Routine! I can make a routine. I can hinge my routine off other people's, which is what works well for me at the farm, and i can see if i can master the art of the amphetamines and maybe get some of my shit done.

Unfortunately all I want to do this week is sew, I watched all of the tourists and locals in NOLA and looked at what they were wearing and now know exactly what I want to make.

and i don't have time to do any of it. but. if i think about it and make concrete plans, i already own much of the fabric and most of the patterns i need. so i can do this. But I'll post separately about the Fashion Lewks I want to do, LOL.

I won't see my physical therapist again until like maybe early June. I counted it out and I've been doing physical therapy for about sixteen weeks at this point. My sister graduated from her physical therapy program and is out on her own now, having hugely improved. I can tell the bad hip is much improved but not healed-- sitting on the plane yesterday someone walked by and bumped my knee and it absolutely did make the cartilage flap go "pop" so that's not healed, but it hurt a lot less than that sort of thing used to. At the last appointment I had, the PT said I should just keep doing the exercises as my circumstances allow, and if they're too easy just increase reps etc., and we'd re-evaluate when I finally saw her again, because obviously I've had all these underlying cascading problems that can only be slowly solved by getting slowly stronger, so who knows.

I don't have concrete goals for that but I would really just. Like to be not-disabled, mostly. Every person has limits, every person is going to have to sit down sometimes, every person is going to have to think hard and make choices about what they do with their bodies-- it's just part of getting into your mid-forties, really-- so I can't just set my goal as being able to do whatever whenever. But I would like to be able to walk for longer distances, I would like to be able to wait in a line without paying for it for days, I would like to just generally be in better shape. So I guess I'll try to work toward that.

idk. and sometime in july my doctor wants me to re-test my fasting blood glucose because the only thing she cares about of my health is that i'm fat and she thinks putting me on metformin will make me not-fat. you'd think she'd have had some interest in diagnosing the pain that was making me unable to exercise but that was not on her radar i guess.

anyway. that's what i'm going to do to get me to june. it's all farm time for the rest of the month and i'm going to do physical therapy and take meth. we'll see how that goes.

#about the author #farm life #etcetera

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yourecitten · 8 months ago

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Hey 💗

I'm new to loa can you help me with some guidance? I love your blog and i feel like you can help me achieve things >3

So there's this guy i started liking recently, he's my online friend but we kinda dont talk anymore he does check my stories specially when i post photos of myself so thats a little weird lol

I used to like him before too and we used to talk n all but recently i feel like i reallly like him

What should i do to manifest him :( do you have any tips which will get me started ? Assumption is a lil hard for me but scripting i do well .

Hi babe.

You are already doing fine! Your awareness of him and his awareness of you (seeing your stories etc) are already a great sign. So don't worry and keep writing your scripts as that is the only way to change the thoughts on a subconscious level. Visualize a scene that implies he is yours and believe it. You don't need to do anything else because it's being delivered to you on a 'speedier' pace than usual. Just stay faithful and persist.

Also remember, if you visualize it and you see in 3D that he is acting different, do not focus on it. The 3D is a representation of your old thoughts. What you see does not matter. Only your imagination/inner world does. If you keep persisting and keep the faith, no matter what he says or how he acts, soon or later he will become the guy you wish him to be because that is what his consciousness is also bringing to fruition. Do not fret, do not focus on the 3D. Only focus on your imagination and it will be delivered. If he texts, talk to him without thinking 'this means my manifestation is working!'. Everything works, always. Whether he is texting you, not texting you, doing something you don't like. Those situations don't matter, they are not the end, they are also part of your desire. So do not focus on them. Just persist for the desire that you want and keep going. That is all you want, and that is all that exists. Do not limit your desire to any 3D circumstance, you do not care about it, you just care about what you want.

If you have decided that what you want is to have him in a relationship with you, that's what you'll get. The only way this won't happen is if you start believing in some silly thing like 'he is probably not even into me' and you focus on that. Just stay in your imagination and do your thing and you'll have him, I promise you that. The moment you try to search for clues that he wants you, you've lost. If you believe that he is probably not into you, that will manifest as well. Do not attach to the 3D. No matter what the 3D tells you, no matter what you see in the 3D, do not get attached to it. Remember that the 3D is illusionary and it reflects the past. It can reflect him being in love with you yesterday or today and hating you tomorrow. This does not matter. The future does not matter, the past does not matter. You only want one thing and that is him in the end

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kindestofkings · 1 year ago

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a mastermind [2]

ryan mcmahon x reader

faceclaim: phoebe bridgers

authors note: happy friday everyone, proud of you for making it through the week xx @orangeinecstasy here you are <3

2022

yourusername just added to their story!

replies:

trumanblack wow WOW what happened to the deep seeded commitment issues??? WHAT ABOUT THE HATE FOR ALL MEN

↳ yourusername I KNOW I KNOW OKAY but matty he was so nice and I had so much fun 😭

charlixcx wow girl when are you back in london! I need to you to chat me up !!

↳ yourusername I'm home next week xx and of course we may or may doing something tomorrow... just the two of us 👀👀

lucydacus the drummer???

↳ yourusername the one and only 😍

julienrbaker we let you go on ONE solo trip and this happens....

↳ yourusername im sorry!!! he was even dreamier in person 😔

yourusername

liked by elijahhewson and others

yourusername pints with the lads 💪💪💪

new friends unlocked! a band, with a nepo baby lead singer... do I have a type? and where do I leave back the old model

view all other comments

bobbyskeetz josh man you're giving that pint some look 👀

joshjenkinson_ the look of love what else?

inhalerfan1 FINALLY my manifesting worked, now you and ryan should fall in love xx

rass75 well I know for a fact you didnt just call us older right? RIGHT??

(liked by trumanblack,bedfordanes75 and adam1975)

yourusername hehehe oh heyyy ha ha about that..

trumanblack heyyy no fair I was your first.

ynhealytruther WOW okay y'all fuck then yourusername FIRST NEPO BABY wow get your head out of the gutter bestie 😀

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15

yourusername no words to describe how I'm feeling rn.

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ynfan1 ahh this HUGE!

taylorswift counting down the days already !

swiftie1 what a service you're both doing for us sad girlies <3

yourusername I see you, I love you and I am a your fellow sad girlie <3

charlixcx taking over the world one day at a time 💅💅

ryanmcmahon_15 🔥🔥

ynhealytruther no comments from the 1975 lads, whats going on 😔

ryanmcmahon_15

liked by yourusername and others

ryanmcmahon_15 some shows in new york.

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lewevans hey no paps please xx

inhalerfan1 sooo excited for you guys to go on tour fully again🕺

yourusername v rockstar v cool

ryanmcmahon_15 second nature at this point 😎 inhalerfan2 ariana what are you doing here? inhalerfan1 shes friends with the lads!

2023

yourusername

liked by julienrbaker and others

yourusername heyy its been while sorry! unplanned mysterious retreat but I've busy writing, busy recording with my fellow geniuses and busy rehearsing!

so heres a slutty soft launch as an apology for being gone ?

comments are turned off

taylorswift

liked by yourusername and others

taylorswift nashville you have been WILD. it's always special getting to share the stage with another artist but when its with the genius/baby angel face yourusername it feels extra special!!!!

view all other comments

yourusername you can say things like this and not expect me to cry 😢😢

yourusername you are my hero thank you thank you everything <33

swiftie1 nothing new destroyed me in the best way possible

ynfan1 it was incredible witnessing yn's pinch me moment !

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername GUYS GUYs please please please don't kill me but the next single is..... a TOTAL LOVE SONG WITH ALL THE HAPPINESS. AH I know how dare I?? but I mean im in love, deal with it. (please please)

anywayy gold rush is yours at midnight friday <3

view all other comments

trumanblack ew love

yourusername have they found a cure yet?? my profession of writing heartbreak songs is on the line god dammit !

ynfan1 I can't believe the love of my life is in love with someone and its NOT me

ynfan2 how can you write scott street and then go write a love song??

yourusername ik the whiplash is real. you're gonna love it tho! I hope..lol!! ynfan2 wait of course I'm gonna love it, every thing you write is magic <3

ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername

liked by bobbyskeetz and others

ryanmcmahon_15 with yourusername welll we (one of us, defo not me) had planned a long softlaunch stage which was VERY detailed, but an eagle eyed fan caught us out ! big thanks to them cause theres cool pics to post :))

view all comments

yourusername my love <33

yourusername am kinda heartbroken soft launching was fun !!

bobbyskeetz my boy is all grown up 😢

joshjenkinson_ feels like just yesterday he was crying listening to waiting room.. yourusername no stop im too soft for it all !!

elijahhewson my matchmaking skills never fail 😎

ryanmcmahon_15 yes thank god for your very elaborate organising of pints <33 elijahhewson hey less is more sometimes ynfan1 wait this is soo cute

inhalerfan1 I KNEW IT I KNEW IT, I knew i could sense the vibes

yourusername girl you were mad for that, you called it before we even met ! im getting witchy vibes xx

taylorswift the detailed planning feels like my fault a bit.... y'all are SO adorable tho

lewevans man what is going on you have the taylor swift in your comments.. ryanmcmahon_15 man I've stopped questioning it, i've the taylor swift in our gaff for monthy wine nights 😂 swiftie1 those two are such icons (taylor and yn) (liked by ryanmcmahon_15)

yourusername

liked by ryanmcmahon_15 and others

yourusername just before I retreat into my home for the holidays and eat nothing but minced pies and never get out of my pjs, I thought I'd leave you guys with a parting gift from my family to yours. so much wine is a craft of love and is everything I think of when I think of the holiday season, theres some oldies, some newbies, some saddies and some friends !

a big thank you to dirtyhit as usual and the genius producers that are trumanblack, bedfordanes75 and rass75 ( all who jumped on a track also)

other friends who graced these records, taylorswift, lucydarcus, hozier and julienrbaker thank you thank you <33

also someone stepped away from the drums for a hot second and made his vocals debut, which I feel honoured about and so proud!

go listen and enjoy <333

view all comments

ryanmcmahon_15 the album and you are a work of art <3

yourusername stfu imma cry 😢

ynfan1 you write melancholy so beautifully, love it all so far!

inhalerfan1 ryan with a vocal debut?? christmas came early

inhalerfan2 obsessed with both of you, you are my parents

elijahhewson thankful everyday sir ryan chose drums or I'd be out of a job..

bobbyskeetz theres still time yet!

joshjenkinson_ thanks for inviting us onto the album!

yourusername it was my PLEASURE sir jenkinson

trumanblack always a pleasure making stuff together bedfordanes75 xx

yourusername we are such a powerhouse of a trio, like the powerpuff girls or something ! ynfan1 not 😭 the 😭 powerpuff 😭 girls 😭

-finished-

Ahh what was that you ask?? can ryan sing?? All important questions! I dont know entirely, all my fics are self-indulgent but this one was particularly bad hahah hence the all over the place plot, also im in a festive mood lol. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THO, as always let me know what you think and come chat <33

#ryan mcmahon fanfic #ryan mcmahon #ryan mcmahon x reader #inhaler oneshots #inhaler dublin #inhaler imagine #inhaler fanfic

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imaginespazzi · 3 months ago

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GH Chapter 6 babyyyyy. Oooh girl, I needed this fluff! Feeling a little down in the dumps as our embryo transfer failed, and honestly this perked me up! No worries though I am remaining positive as we have a few more frozen embryos so we shall try again :) But truly reading this chapter yesterday gave me such a boost! Thank you :) REACTIONS - My only negative feedback/correction is that it is indeed, as easy for a literal child to buy alcohol in eastern Europe as it is to buy coke 😂😂😂 wild place. - The whole sequence of them in the gazebo, P bringing up the date, the angst, anticipation, butterflies brought me back to being 15. Which is a huge feat because girl, it was a while ago lol - "She does none of the above. Instead Azzi kisses Paige back." Oh thank the lord above Azzi Fudd LET YOUR LOINS LEAD YOU and chill a bit - Their hearts talking to each other. What a beautiful depiction of what it would feel like to be kissing your person again after all this time. Although I am firmly in the camp of them having had some sort of physical/sexual interaction either during Ps marriage or after her divorce teehee - “I- I broke your heart. I broke us. How could you possibly want that again. How could you possibly want me again?” AZZI does she have to spell it out in sky writing? She loves you and will always love you and will always want you. Forever. One step forward two steps back with this one eh - "Take it slow and see where it goes and maybe we’ll- maybe we’ll be even better this time.” See Paige is wise. Our dumb blonde is not so dumb when it comes to MATTERS OF THE HEART. And Vagina. - THE RULES. You been spending too much time w/ @pb524830 haha. Hopefully you don't EDGE US TO DEATH like a certain someone did for the first part of PnP. - I wanna know did they like sit down and have a formal conversation about what the rules are? Also what is within the kissing boundary lol Tongue? Little boob squeeze? Giving themselves blue-clits over here. Better buy batteries for their vibrators at Costco prob going through a couple double-As every 3 days. - But in all honestly the thought of them making out on Azzis couch after Stephie is in bed, then having to separate and have Paige go back to her house at the end of the night is very high school and precious and cute. - Ok girl you know the car seat thing was the highlight for me. You put a big smile on my face by including that I LOVED IT. And its pu-ple!!!! cute cute cute cute - “You look really happy today sweetheart,” Tim says softly. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 - Dying at the contrast of Stephie thinking the sun shines out of P's ass and she is the moral and Christ-like center of the universe while Jon and Jose are like um no this bitch is a menace you don't even know - Awwww are the 3 of them gonna sleep in a queen sized bed w/ Stephie in the middle. I can't. Lil family - “you won’t- you won’t run away again tomorrow morning will you?” make me cry again why don't you - I think hearing EVERYONE around her calling P 'Paige' has gotta switch up Stephies name for her at some point. Maybe hearing Drew call her Paigey will influence her? Overall this was such delicious fluff and perfect whisps of angst. Made my day- my week! Thank you for sharing your talent with us. Am I terrified for whats to come? YUP! But hopefully you can preserve our hearts a little bit by keeping up some tender fluff throughout 😭 <3 🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼🤱🏼

Aww bby sending you so much virtual love and hugs. I'm glad this chapter cheered you up and I'm manifesting so hard for it to work next time <3

LMAO I did actually think of this but then was like when would Paige have time to just walk around Minsk and find alcohol lol?

That whole scene is veryy vaguely inspired by my own first kiss so it was actually pretty easy to write and I just channeled my inner 15 year old (been a while for me too) into it

NOT THE LOINS LMAO I had a feeling you'd appreciate the "plot twist"

Azzi's just an overthinker BUT SHE'S WORKING ON IT! In the meantime I guess blondie has custody of their one shared braincell.

LMAO I don't think anyone will ever get to the level of edging that @pb524830 did like she's simply just the queen of sexual tension and making us suffer.

THE CAR SEAT SCENE REALLY WAS FOR YOU SO I'M SO HAPPY YOU LIKED IT

I'm so attached to Miss Buecks like I lowkey don't want to have Stephie call her anything else and I can't think of any other original nickname that only Stephie would call her.

#ask #fic talk #🤱🏼 anon my personal jester <3 #why is everyone so terrified? y'all i can write happy!

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garbinge · 2 years ago

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The Long Game

Din Djarin x f!Reader

Day 29 these April Prompts: “Deep Breaths”

Summary: You contemplated (overthink) the news you have to tell Din as he walks you home.

A/N: This is the start of a larger multi-chap (a theme I have LOL) not sure when I’ll get to posting more parts. I also haven’t watched s3 yet (I know I know, I’m waiting for my partner to catch up on Boba Fett so we can watch together!!!) but this is a little AU from the canon plot anyways. Also in this fic, the Mandalorian code has some stuff about marriage and love in it. Just to add some dramatic effect. First time writing for Din, I hope to get more comfortable as I write more!

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: All my fics are 18+ regardless of content. Mentions of pregnancy, anxiety/panic attack, overthinking, stress.

Mando Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics

Your nerves were starting to manifest into bile in your throat. You stared at the back of the helmet of the man you had been sleeping with for, well, years at this point, and yet you were nervous.

“Din.” You said at a mumble, part of you hoping maybe he didn’t hear you and you could call this an attempt and try again tomorrow.

“Yea?” He turned to look at you. Now his visor was staring directly at you, and even though his eyes weren’t visible you felt them burning into your own.

It was a scene that was familiar to you, you'd pretty much seen it everyday, and when he was away on a bounty hunt, it was something you truthfully missed. The dark sky with bright stars, the low lighting of the town since everything had closed and the cantina was usually one of the last things to shut down every night here in Nevarro. But the vision of him standing there to walk you home was comforting, or at least, it had been before you had news to share with him.

“Walkin’ me home?” You took a deep breath, the first of many, and stepped towards him, not letting your eyes move from where you assumed his were.

“Of course.” His helmet rasped. You weren’t sure if the helmet altered his voice to sound like that or if that was just how he spoke since he’d never taken it off in front of you. Honoring his code despite the situation you two had. That’s when you started to spiral in your head. You never even saw this man’s face. You were lucky to have his bare hands touch you, in intimate situations as well as not. You knew his full name, but that was after months of him visiting you on Tatooine. Suddenly, the bile that had settled for a moment was rising, the thought that you might not really have known this man was eating at you and you were getting overwhelmed. Breathing was becoming hard, your chest felt like there was a bantha sitting on you. But something cut through the noise.

“Take a deep breath, what’s going on?”

Din was now standing in front of you, and his gloved hands were lightly touching your shoulders, in an attempt to ground you without being too forceful. It was something you never told him calmed you but just something he picked up on from knowing you. Right, knowing you. Din knew you. You knew Din. You might not have known his face but you knew him. His intentions. His life. His personality.

You inhaled and let your shoulders rise, his hands not removing themselves as you did.

“I’m good.” You kept your reply simple as you nodded your head forward to show you wanted to start walking.

He didn’t question any more, his hands dropped and he walked alongside of you on the path that began your journey home. Another amazing thing about Din, he didn’t push.

“Do you remember when we first met?” You looked up at the sky almost like you could envision that moment entirely right there.

A chuckle left Din’s helmet. “Do I?” His boots crunched on the pavement as he walked. “I have a permanent scar to remember it forever.”

“Sorry.” You smiled and looked over at him. “You're my best friend, you know?” You said after a long pause.

“We’ve known each other for a long time.” Din agreed in his own way.

It was funny, because he was right. You did know each other for a really long time. But yet, you never established any definition of the relationship you had. He visited you frequently on Tatooine when he was there for work. He brought you with him to Nevarro when your house burned down on Tatooine, he walked you home every night, you two started fooling around somewhere in the midst of all that and you never established any ground rules or titles, except you hid the intimacy from everyone. You understood the Mandalorian code, and you knew how much Din honored that. You didn’t argue it because well, it's part of what made him, him.

In the years you’ve known Din and been sleeping with him, he’d gone away on hunts and he never questioned what you did when he was gone or vice versa. You picked up business as usual when he came back. You never did anything, although you did flirt with people at the bar, even when he was back, it was how you made a decent living and you thought he knew that but as the news you had to share with him right now mulled in your head you started to wonder if he truly did.

Maybe he did keep warm bodies around when he was away. Maybe even more than that, and this was just what it was, friends with benefits. But could you even call it that? Friends? Benefits? Especially now? Then you remembered you just called him your best friend. Probably for the first time, or was it? Why was it such a big deal you hide whatever this was from everyone? They knew you two hung out? Oh, right, Mandalorian code, that calmed you down for a minute, but then the next thought funneled in. Well, there had to be a work around with that? He couldn’t have been the first Mandalorian to fall in love? Fall in love? Who were you kidding, you didn’t even know if calling him your best friend was appropriate and now you’re assuming he’s in love? Maybe you thought that because YOU felt that. Holy shit, were you in love with a Mandalorian? Your next thought shook you to your core. Not just a Mandalorian but YOUR Mando. Your Mando? Again the man who you couldn’t even call your best friend without going into an overthinking spiral? Your stomach turned. There it was that bile again. Making its way up your throat.

“I have to tell you something.” You blurted out, getting overwhelmed by your own thoughts.

Din said nothing and stared at you waiting for you to say something.

You stared at him, and for some reason, pushed all your thoughts aside. It was what you did every time you spent time with him, it was what you did to put you in this situation so it would have to work to let it out. You took one last deep breath before speaking.

“I’m pregnant.”

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misc-obeyme · 5 months ago

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gotta say I was bouncing off the walls after reading "Worth it" akskdjc, SO GOOD. IF I HAD TIME I WOULD'VE DRAWN ME AND MAMMON BEGGING ON OUR KNEES FOR PART TWO AND BARB LOOKING AT US IN EXASPERATION LMAOO BUT THAT FEELS TOO ADVANCED

i got a comm back yesterday of the coffee shop au 😭 so happy with it. I'm still thinking about it every day, I've just been getting kicked around by life (but I might be getting a raise? that was a rumor. i gotta talk to the store manager today about stuff going on and I'm NERVOUS)

I also got encouraged by vy to write about some solomams brainrot i was hinting at in tags one day about the cup noodle post SO THAT'S GONNA HAPPEN SOON

i think I decided on Lucky Brew as the coffee shop name, so it's now being dubbed lucky brew au ?? the students will ask for "a shot of luck"/"a lucky shot" and it just means getting an extra espresso shot in their drink. or possibly edible glitter being added but i think that'd only be visible in cold drinks

And if Mammon slips a pastry to anyone who looks REALLY anxious about their upcoming exam, no, you didn't see him to that. What are you talking about? They totally ordered it. Yeah the person didn't pay for it because uhhh... They had a coupon (what do you mean he doesn't give out coupons? he does now! stop accusing him of being a softie)! or they were his umm... 28th customer of the day! or he forgot to ring it in when they ordered but he's not gonna make them pay for his mistake!

i just wanted to ramble and say hi aksjd. idk why it feels like it's been forever, my sense of time got swayed when i was on vacation but I'm back now! Hope you have a good day/night!!! I hope you find a rare shiny object tomorrow on the ground!! I'm manifesting

Fear not. You and Mammon need not beg, for part two is already in the works. I REGRET NOTHING.

In fact, I'm quite surprised that Mammon x Barbatos silliness got as many notes as it did lol. And the responses in the tags and replies were so amazing that I was inspired. So part two is happening because I can't help myself now.

OH I hope the raise wasn't just a rumor and that you got one!! I'm sorry life's been crappy, but hopefully things will turn around soon!

Ahh sweetest dearest Vy, they are always so encouraging!! And YES DO IT. Write all the solomams!!

I love the name Lucky Brew, that's absolutely perfect! And of course Mammon would find edible glitter aldsfkjdf trust him to bling up some coffee drinks~

Bah I love when he's being a softie and especially when he protests about it. Like we know the truth, baby, you can't hide your golden heart from us!

I hope you had a lovely vacation and that you also have a wonderful day/night!

#macaron still has a choke hold on me I'm afraid #but sometimes I just gotta go with the inspiration even if I only take a handful of people with me lol #obey me mammon #obey me solomon #lonely-north-star #cc mutuals #misc answers

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all-these-larrythings · 1 year ago

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Fic by Numbers

Hi!! I was tagged by @kingsofeverything!

Rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

Fic with the most hits:

If Tomorrow Never Comes (We Had Last Night) So loved writing this with @fallinglikethis and it will always hold a special place in my heart because of it!

Fic with 2nd most kudos:

When It's Late At Night I still remember the fever dream of the first Late Late appearance and how I had WAY too much fun with this one. I often dream of a part 2.

Fic with the 3rd most comments:

You Might Want to Marry My Husband LOL. Pretty sure 99.9999% of these are just 'a bookmark'

Fic with the 4th most bookmarks:

The Brightest Lights I still have no idea what made me want to write this one back in the day. I think I was helping manifest actorHarry.

Fic with the 5th most words:

Initiate the Feeling LOLLL. I eventually added a disclaimer to this one because it was one of my very first fics and it's 71k for WHAT💀💀

Fic with the fewest words:

Sticks and Stones I miss the 1000 Feelings challenge so much 😭

Thank you @kingsofeverything. I'm now tagging @pocketsunshineharry, @fallinglikethis, and @laynefaire ❤️

#Fic by numbers

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mercurial-thrills · 2 months ago

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How To Get In Touch With Your **Writer's Side**

NOTE: At the bottom of the post, I will be linking helpful resources. They vary from compilations of writerly memes to ways to fight against writer's block. They may be beneficial.

As writers, we have all had our days where we feel a minimal connection to the side we have in common: our writer side. We wonder to ourselves, "Do I even count as a writer?" and have impostor syndrome sneak up in the form of cognitive distortions.

We have moments where we struggle to acknowledge our strengths. We have times where our head feels disconnected from our hands on the keyboard. We cannot write anything because we feel stuck on our own disbelief. This can manifest as writer's block, feeling like a fraud, or lacking motivation to write.

This is where reconnecting with your writer-ness may help. It's something I have done too, when I struggle to write. From writing positive affirmations about writing to looking through my Pinterest board about writing, I have done many insightful activities to help me feel more connected to my craft.

Look At Writer's Memes

Memes are a strong platform for self expression. They have the ability to make us laugh, and as a tool to help us relate to others. This ties into the second point, as seeing people comment "big mood lol" on memes about tying identity to writing can help you recognize we are a community, and we can relate to each other.

As well, it reminds you about your life as a writer. It reminds you how writers are still writers, regardless of their writer's block, lack of motivation, apparent lack of skill, and through the wrath of impostor syndrome. We are all writers, and we will all relate to each other.

Talking To Writer Friends, Because Others May Not Understand

If you want, you can talk to non-writer friends about the problems you are facing. Whether you need advice, a listening ear, or someone who can relate(i.e. "I've experienced this, so I feel you"), other human beings can be quite a positive resource.

However, discussing feelings with a writer may be beneficial. They are more likely to understand the struggles you face, and they may be likely to understand and validate writing-related feelings.

Make Small, Achievable Writing Goals

When it comes to making goals for yourself, nothing is too small to be considered a valid goal. For someone, "eat healthy" may be a simple goal. For others, "include one specific nutrient in every meal" and "eat on a regular basis" may be what they require. Assigning goals to others neglects their need, so no writer can assign goals to you. It's up to you.

If you feel like "Write 500 words" is unattainable, then write 250. If you feel like writing out one character outline is unattainable, write half of it and revisit it later. If one of these goals is unattainable but you did not know that, it is okay.

My mother, and others around me, have told me, "You did the best you could today. What you can do tomorrow is the best you can do tomorrow." They describe success as flowing rather than a fixed goal, which is a philosophy I have followed since I heard it for the first time. It changed me.

Write. Please, write.

Yes, I can hear you groaning through the computer screen. I can hear it loud and clear, the dreaded statement no writer wants to hear: go and write.

Personally, I find setting timers to be helpful. First, start with writing in five minute intervals. Then, increase it to ten. Then, increase it to fifteen, then twenty, then twenty five. If you find yourself getting in the zone after you have set the timer, you may not want to take a break. You don't have to take a break. It varies depending on the person.

Attending writing sprints can be beneficial. As long as you ignore the live chat during the writing sprints, everyone is writing alongside of you. The only competition is the timer, unless you want to beat all the word counts in the chat.

Overall, reconnecting with writer-ness can be beneficial. It can make us feel connected to what we create, remind ourselves we are worthy, and allows us to be imperfect and prone to mistakes. It allows us to become easily inspired, and write what we desire to write.

Resources

My Pinterest board For writing memes:

Another article I like on writer's block:

A site called Fighter's Block which pressures the writer to write fast so their character does not run out of health:

The Authortube community on Youtube, where you may relate to writers:

#yes i know writer-ness isn't a word #let me have my fun #writing #writers #writers on tumblr #writing tips #writing tip #writing advice #on writing #writerscommunity #tips #tip #advice

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