#man who just put on his packer for the day

[maxxmutt]

Having a good gender moment and I wanna say that I love trans joy and gender euphoria this shit kicks ass

[sophiesbf]

perv!stalker!nat x reader

mdni // tmasc!nat, intox, noncon, every character on this post is 18 years old.

you both study at the same school on your last year, you have some classes together, but you've never been close.

ever since you did a chemistry project together (because the teacher chose it) you just greet each other at the school halls, nothing more than a "hi", but for Nat, it was much more.

of course, because you are so smart and beautiful, Nat begins to be fascinated by you.

you noticed how he look at you in class, but for you it wasn't a big deal, even though he kept staring at you throughout the entire class, fucking you up with his eyes.

and dawg, he needs to relieve himself, he always — like, every single day — ends up asking to go to the bathroom in the middle of class, he literally needs to touch himself thinking about you. he's completely addicted to you.

at a party where you were drinking alone, you were so drunk, Nat offered you a drink — which you didn't know he had put some drugs in —, and when you got so dumb, suddenly Nat started rubbing himself against you, how come no one was watching. but you didn't care, you were drunk, he probably wasn't doing it on purpose.

cute anonymous letters appearing on your locker, like: “you looked so beautiful today.”, “I hope you know how pretty you are.”, “you are mine and I will do whatever it takes to have you with me.”

he definitely thinks about you while listening to romantic songs.

he discovered your favorite flowers and had a student deliver them to you.

he followed you home for a whole week to find out your routine.

one day you were walking home from school alone, the streets were empty and suddenly he pushed you into an alley. he started taking off his pants and made you kneel down. “Nat, what are you doing?” “I’m making my dream come true, babe.” so he made you gag on his packer.

he made you swear that you wouldn't tell anyone about this incident, or that he would spread some secret of yours to everyone, that he found out because he was a fucking stalker.

after that day, he would appear throwing pebbles at your bedroom window every night, and you were forced to let him in.

at first you didn't like it, you thought he was a freak weirdo. but after a few weeks, you started to fall in love with him. he really did so many things just to have you by his side. <3

on those nights when he appeared in your room, you slept cuddling together, he always ended up rubbing himself against you, touching you inappropriately, but you got used to liking it.

modern au perv!stalker!nat

an unknown number sent you lots of love messages, you don't know who is that, but you couldn't care less, what could he do, after all? so you ended up not blocking it.

suddenly you started receiving nudes from this unknown number, and man, it was Nat, you found out when he sent you a boob pic showing his face. you don't know if it was intentional.

he took pictures of you while you were changing in your room.

he managed to put a tracker on your cell phone.

I'm sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language and it's my second writing here. hope y'all enjoy it.

[forcemasculinisation]

I agree with the anon asking about T-dick. We need more content.

Imagine bumping into a girl one day who looks like she's trying to look like a guy but doing a poor job of it. She's got half a used tube of low dose T-cream, wears a jock and a packer and binds. It's the not quite short enough hair and voice that tips you off.

A perfect candidate to be forcemasced perhaps?

Trigger Warnings: Dubious consent.

I'd say shes already on her way to being easily manipulated, pretty malleable even. He just needs that extra push to know what's best for him.

Once you get to know her, she piles on excuses about her appearance. Her shaggy hair covers half her face, like she is insecure about her soft features. She swears she binds for some sort of personal preference, and takes T to help her gain an advantage in track. There's no point in justifying the silicone dick between her legs; but she still finds a way to try and convince you. It puts her in the right mindset - that's all.

You take stronger medication than her, enanthate injections, and you eventually coax out of her that she's curious about it. Says she's always been curious about upping her dose, but scared about the effects. You give her the illusion of consent by letting her know, casually, of some of the major changes she could see. Thicker and longer body hair. A much deeper voice. Coarser skin and less curves. You joke with her that an increased sex drive is another common effect, and his eyes subtly widen at that.

Soon enough, months of her straddling you as you push your needle into her skin go by. You're already starting to see major changes, and soon enough a man stands before you. His hair is still long, shoulder length by the time facial hair starts to show, but - seemingly on her own accord - he buzzes it off. She still seems uncomfortable with such sudden changes, as anyone would be, but it's your job to assure him that it's all fine. She'll still be straight if she presents this way, and straight guys love masculine girls (a sweet lie, of course, but how else will you pursuade him?).

It's fun to watch him flush as you call him a good man (a good boy, occasionally) for taking his shots so well. You get to introduce him as your mate, your boy to others, using he/him pronouns, and watch with pride as his protests of "I'm actually a girl" falter with every moment.

Social transition is the hardest. But he'll get there soon enough. He's your boy toy now.

[xplrwithme]

Authors note: I have not written a fic in well over 10 years. Be kind!

“Baby,” you groaned. You couldn't fully believe you were getting into the same argument with him again. You held up the cursed jersey and shook it in his face. “I love you, but I refuse to put this on.”

Cole rolled his eyes and huffed.

“I don’t really see the big deal, babe.”

Your eyes shot to his face.

“BIG DEAL?” You threw your hands up in disbelief causing the jersey to fly around. “It’s a SIN!”

He sighed. “Here we go,” he said before sitting down on the edge of the bed.

You ignored him and continued.

“Cole. Baby. Babe. Love of my life. Light of my days. This isn’t just any normal game. It’s the CENTENNIAL GAME. The Boston Bruins’ 100th year. Massively important in hockey history. Against our BIGGEST rivals. How is this NOT a big deal?!”

You paced back and forth across the bedroom digging your socked feet into the carpet of the hotel room. The hand not holding the cursed jersey counted out each and every point against wearing the damned thing.

“I’m asking you to show support for me, your loving boyfriend,” he retorted, trying to defend himself.

You tossed the red jersey down on the bed beside him as even holding felt like it would cause you to break out in hives. Cole rolled his eyes again at the size of your dramatics.

“I do support you!” You shot back weakly “Just.. not against my team.” Your boys.

“Baby, if you put that Marchand jersey on, I’m walking out of here.” He gestured towards the black and gold jersey sticking out of your bag. The whole reason the argument had started.

You stopped instantly.

You had so little time together before Cole had to get ready for the game and wanted to see him for as long as possible. Having a long distance boyfriend who lived in Canada and traveled for a living wasn’t for the weak. You hardly got to see him during the season. You didn’t want him to leave early over a jersey...BUT you couldn’t bring yourself to support the Montreal Canadiens. God, what would your mother think? You literally had season tickets for the Boston Bruins. The TD garden was your happy place!

You sighed.

“Cole. I love you. I do. But I hate your team. It’s in my blood. You knew this before getting into a relationship with me. I told you from day one that I couldn’t wear your jersey.”

Your team loyalty ran deep.

“It’s a goddamned jersey.” His face grew red with frustration. “You can’t put aside a rivalry for your own boyfriend?”

“It’s like me asking you to wear a Bears jersey instead of a Packers jersey! Do you see the issue here?”

He sighed in defeat and rolled his eyes, clearly knowing he wasn’t getting his way.

“Whatever.” He perked up. “I’ll make a bet with you then. If we win, you have to wear my jersey at our next home game and spend the week with me in Montreal.”

“Absolutely not, the B’s have been playing like shit lately. Too easy.”

Cole raised his eyes to the ceiling, looking for any sort of guidance from the gods above to deal with his amazingly stubborn future wife.

“Okay fine. If I score a goal, then you have to come spend the week in Montreal with me after our next home game.”

You giggled, knowing that no matter how much you frustrated the man, he couldn’t hold anything against you.

“Okay fine, but that’s not much of a punishment. If the B’s win, then I still get to come to Montreal for a week, I just don’t have to put...that…on.” You gestured towards the horrible jersey.

Cole smiled in that soft, boyish way that made you remember why you fell in love with him. He pulled you forward so you were standing between his legs and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

“Deal,” he conceded with a whisper. He pulled back to glance at you with that soft smile. He pressed his thumb to your cheek as he caressed your face. “I’m sorry that I got annoyed, but I just wanna know that you’re supporting me still.”

You frowned. When was that ever in question?

“Cole, I love you and I support you no matter what even if I hate the team you play for. You know this. Where’s this coming from? It can’t just be about the jersey.” It wasn’t like him to be jealous or insecure. Since the day you’d met Cole, he had been a confident, bright ball of sunshine.

He sighed and leaned back on the bed, looking down at his knees.

“It’s just been hard lately, you know? I see the whole team with their WAGs on the daily, and we’re lucky if we get to see each other once a month. And I know it’s my job that causes the distance, but I just miss you. All the time.”

You quickly blinked away the tears that came to your eyes at his confession. It had been tough. On both of you. You and Cole had been together for a year and a half, but you didn’t get to spend much time together during the season.

You suddenly panicked, thinking maybe it was getting to be too much for him. Not being able to bear the thought of not being with him at all.

“Does...does that mean you don’t want this anymore? Is it too much?” You really didn't want to cry, but it was becoming inevitable. “I know it’s a lot, but I’m almost done with school. And as soon as I graduate, I thought we had plans for me to move to Montreal with you. I...I just...I’m so close to being done, you know, and I’m working so hard--“

Cole quickly cut you off as he stood and grasped your shoulders.

“Honey, no. That’s not what I’m saying at all. Get that out of your head right now. It’s hard, but I know we can do it. You only have a year left. I would wait a hundred years if it meant I got to be with you forever. All I’m saying is that I miss you. I’m so grateful for the time we do get to be together. Ask any of the guys, I haven’t been able to shut up about this game all week, because I knew I would get to spend a day with you.”

Cole wrapped his strong arms around you as he pulled you into a hug. One you both needed.

You both sighed in relief.

“I love you,” he said softly. His lips were at your ear. “I’ll never stop loving you and I’ll never give up on us. I can’t wait til we can get you to Montreal for good and for our lives to start together. It’s only a year...”

“It’s only a year,” you echoed in agreement.

Cole kissed you with enough passion that you were certain your makeup was smudged. He leaned back towards the bed before handing you the Marchand jersey and grinning.

“C'mon. Put this on and let’s go, I got a goal to score for you tonight.”

The night did indeed end with the Bruins winning 6-3, one of those goals being Cole’s. You didn’t miss the way he looked up and pointed at your section when he scored. Your knees felt weak with anticipation at what exactly that goal meant. You couldn’t wait for your week in Montreal without a red jersey on your body.

[eldrytchcryptid]

"You gotta enjoy every part of your transition, you're still becoming a man now - even without it."

-a very wise trans girl

I've been waiting almost a decade to start testosterone, and finally having a date for my gender appointment has made me... almost ignore all the euphoric changes (and all the weird and funny changes) happening in my transition as a trans man. So I thought I'd make a list of pre-t stuff! I might add more later - or y'all can add some too!

Socially transitioning

- feeling I gotta make sure to let ladies go first (on the bus, through doors etc)

- "Ma'am?" "Who??? Oh right. Uh yeah no." / "Deadname?" "DEADNAME?" "WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO RN - oh lol."

- oh god am I making her nervous DUDE STOP BEING WEIRD *I'm literally just walking home and it's dark* BE LESS WEIRD *aaaAaaAAA*

- *mmm boobs* *AAAA IM LOOKING AVERT AVERT AVERT*

- am i still allowed to say hi and pull faces at cute babies or is it weird cause I'm a dude now?? Am I creepy?? But kids! Kids are fun!!

- *on dating apps* oh god this is so different now I have to come up with conversation oh god oh no

- yes let me pick up these heavy chairs for you ma'am yes I am helpful I am a valid man now / yes let me get this thing off this high shelf even tho I'm only 5'7

- *watching videos of me a year ago* oh shit I actually speak lower now w/o T

- that crunchy morning / cold-ridden / drunk low rumbling voice 😩👌

With a (stp) packer

- *upon putting it on* oh oh it's a dick holy shit yes

- *upon taking it off at the end of the day* 😭 noooooo my dick my broski I miss you already

- the fcking toilet seat

- aim aIM GOD NO nOT THERE

- I really hope I don't look like I'm hard rn

- *need to adjust* *no I'm disgusting don't look at me*

- *upon crossing legs* oh shit I can't wait hold up it's in the way *has to change way to cross legs*

- manspreading?? Am I spread too much??? help

- these trousers as tight af but my dick looks amazing right now

- left or right. Too far up wait *searches pictures of dudes to find out where to put my dick

- *touches whilst sat chilling at home* fren. safe. i love u pp

- *squish* *wiggle*

- *I will hit you with my penis as an threat*

Minoxidil (pre-t beard growth)

- *stroking beard* hheeeeeee fluffyyyy

- RAZOR BURN ITCHY

- researching how tf to shave cause apparently i can't fuckin do it right

- stubble???? Itch???? Euphoria???

- *strokes* hmmm yes indeed

- gotta fuckin use twice the face wash cause I'm essentially shampooing at this point

Body

- huh yea guess that's me (instead of hatred/disgust)

- yeeeee hairy legsssss

- cis guys wish they had this ass dude

- need musle gib *too chronic fatigued to work out*

- mm yes men's clothes (on top half w/binder)

- mm no men's clothes (thighs and ass too strong 🥲)

- shoes make me taller let's fucking go

- men have tits too right? Ye man I just got man tits

- *stroking the mirror like I'm Mulan* am I just a gross man? Is this my fate?

- strapon. just. strapon.

[bullet-prooflove]

Wife Number Nine: Young!Les Packer x Reader

Part of the Young!LesPacker Fallen Star Series

Companion piece to Stolen Kisses & Sheets

Tagging: @kishie8 @aaa111aaa222 @oureternalbond @kirisimpster @words-and-seeds @thump31 @thandesa91 @lifeis-tooshort @anime-weeb-4-life @genius2050

It’s past midnight when you turn up at Les’s door with a thirteen-year-old beauty queen and a Colt 44 that’s still warm to the touch.

“Molly?” he questions when his eyes land on the young girl clad in a thin white nightdress that leaves little to the imagination with a man’s denim jacket thrown over her shoulders.

The last thing he expects is to see Timber’s daughter under your care. He’s spent days putting up missing person’s posters, shaking down every low life in town and putting the fear of God into anyone who’s ever laid hands on a child. He’d never thought…

He knew the cult were fucked up, but it hadn’t even crossed his mind because she was so fucking young. He thinks of you back then, sixteen and already a bride. He realises he should have known; he knew Fallen Star are dangerous, he’s seen the scars across your skin…

“Wife number nine.” You say quietly as you set the gun down on the sideboard and gently guide Molly into his home.  “They took her when she was on the way back from the library. Her backpack’s still there…”

Molly finally tilts her head up towards him, her eyes are dull and glassy. Her pupils are pinpricks drowned out by the hues of her iris, there’s no recognition in them despite the fact he’s been present in her life for a couple of years by now.

“It’s the drugs.” You explain as you settle Molly on the couch, she lays down on her side and closes her eyes as you drape the tartan blanket that his mother had given him over her lithe frame. “It’s supposed to make the first time easier…”

He can tell from the tone of your voice that it doesn’t.

The two of you move into the kitchen, you close the door over behind you, leaving a gap so that you can keep an eye on Molly.

“Did he…” Les can’t bring himself to say it.

You shake your head.

“I didn’t let it get that far.” You tell him as you lean against the kitchen counter your arms crossed over your chest. He can read you like a book; he knows what it means when you withdraw like this, he knows that if you drew up the sleeves of that white peasant blouse that he’d see the bruises. He knows why Molly remains untouched. His jaw tightens at the thought, and he wishes you had never had to make that choice.

“I need to call Timber.” He says, his hand rubbing over the back of his neck. “When he finds out where she’s been…”

You both know what’s about to happen. As soon as the MC learns about what happened, they’re going to wipe Fallen Star off the face of the earth. Anybody who was complicit in the kidnapping is going to end up buried.

“If you want to get someone out, now’s the time to do it.” He tells you as his hand rests upon avocado rotary phone.

You both know that he’s talking about your father, the man who traded you to the sixty year old man, who became your husband so that he could take his place as one of the elders. The man who’s going to beat you bloody, who’s going to kill you when he finds you’ve left the leader of Fallen Star naked and dead in the middle of his bedroom with a hole the size of your fist in his chest.

“No.” You say resolutely. “He knew what they were doing when they took her, he knew how old she was, that she was just a little girl…”

You trail off as you feel the weight of it all starting to collapse in on you, it builds up in your chest and you blink rapidly but you hold it together because this isn’t about you. This is about Molly, about making sure she stays safe, because you are sure as shit know they will try to get her back, even with Ben dead. She’ll be forced to marry the next man, bear his children, it’s a cycle that won’t ever end, not unless someone makes it.

“Do it.” You tell Les. “Make the call.”

Love Les? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[thatseventiesbitch]

Would it be okay to request a possible time-travel scenario where the gang + Red and Kitty end up in the 2020's and their reactions to basically everything?

Thanks for the request! I tried my best, haha. Not sure if this is what you had in mind, but this is what came out. 😂 It features the whole gang circa 2022(?) Have a request? You can send it here!

Fez fell asleep on the basement couch after an afternoon of consuming far too much sugar. He started to toss and turn on the narrow cushions, his sleep fitful and his brow beginning to sweat.

This dream wasn't beginning like his normal dreams - he wasn't naked on top of a cotton candy cloud, being fed tootsie rolls by a gaggle of naked models. Instead he was - dream!Fez rubbed his eyes, bringing everything into sharper focus - he was inside the Point Place central mall? He blinked a few times, taking it in.

Yep, it was the mall. He shook his head. Everything looked so familiar, but so different to him at the same time.

Fez whipped around, looking all the way around him, and he was surprised to find that the whole gang was there. Looking very peculiar indeed.

"Fez!" Jackie called. She waved at him, holding a small black rectangle in her hand. She was dressed in tight jeans and a leopard print top. "Stand in front of that fountain." She gestured a few feet to his left. "I'll put it on my story."

"What story?"

"My Snapchat story." Jackie rolled her eyes, annoyed that he wasn't listening to her. "Now move!" She waved her hand again, and Fez obeyed through his confusion. She frowned, though, when he just stood in front of the fountain limply. "You need to pose."

"You need to pose, Fez," Kelso agreed. He'd come up behind Jackie. He, too, was dressed strangely. "I suggest looking off into the distance. It's very mysterious." Jackie nodded her approval. "Maybe with a chin grasp," Kelso demonstrated. Now Jackie clapped.

"Michael's very good at this," Jackie informed Fez. "How many Instagram followers do you have now, Michael?"

"Almost 20,000," Kelso crowed, shining an imaginary badge on his chest. "Yeah. That's half as many as Beyoncé."

"No it's not," Donna mouthed, shaking her head. She'd approached too, with Eric.

"Who even comes to malls anymore?" Eric was complaining. "I forgot this was here."

"They're a dying breed," Hyde agreed, trailing a few feet behind. He clasped his belt buckle. "A relic." He grinned at Red. "Kinda like you."

"Watch it," the older man glared. He held his wife's hand in one hand, and a Dick's Sporting Goods bag in the other. "I'm only here for some new tennis shoes." He scowled. "The regular kind, not... lizard feet."

Kitty interrupted, giggling. "The salesman tried to get him to try on some of those newfangled running shoes. The ones with the toes."

"Just not right," Red mumbled, while Kitty continued to giggle. His phone chimed, and he lifted it from his coat pocket and then scowled. "And, damn it, the Packers just allowed another touchdown. Kitty - we've gotta go. C'mon."

"C'mon kids. Everyone in the Tahoe, let's go."

"Fine by me, man. The music here blows," Hyde turned to follow Red and Kitty to the parking garage. Eric and Donna nodded and did the same. A Lil Baby song had started playing, offending their ears.

"Wait!" Jackie protested. "My story!" She stuck her lip out in a little pout, and shook her phone at them all. "I want to document this day."

"Jackie, it's just been a normal day," Hyde said, but he turned around and so did Eric and Donna.

"So what?" she insisted. "It's been a normal day with my favorite people. And I want pictures!"

"Of course you do," Hyde sighed, annoyed. But he was all but won over.

"They always want to document it," Eric agreed. Donna poked his side.

"Starting with Fez," Jackie beamed at him. She held up her phone, and Kelso coached him on 'elongating his cheekbones'. She snapped his picture, and then grinned even wider when she analyzed her shot. "Aw. Fezzie! You're so cute!"

"I'm cuter," Kelso insisted, pushing forward and pushing Fez aside. "Take my picture next, Jackie. But - " he carefully instructed her which angles were his best, and they negotiated the best light.

"Gorgeous, Michael," Jackie promised him after she'd snapped it. "Especially with that new filter."

"Oh, that new filter's the best thing that ever happened to me," he chuckled.

"Don't let Brooke hear you say that," Donna scowled.

"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, m'lady," Eric sidled up behind her and kissed her cheek, quickly diffusing her anger. She smiled and leaned back into him, and Jackie snapped a few candid shots of them.

"Better than the new Star Wars movie?" she teased him.

"Hmm," he pretended to think about it. "It's about 50/50," he teased her back, and she elbowed him.

Finally, Jackie turned the camera around to selfie mode. "C'mere, Puddin'," she gestured for Hyde. He loped over to her, reluctant.

"Jackie," he sighed. "You know how much I hate pictures."

"But you love me, right?" She scrunched up her nose, and he couldn't help but grin. He didn't say anything, but he took off his sunglasses. Jackie grinned triumphantly, and pointed at him. "You didn't say no, Steven. That's as good as - "

He kissed her, and by the time they were done making out he let her take whatever photos she wanted.

Plus, they needed to wrap it up. Red was laying on the horn from the parking garage.

"Come on already! Dumbasses."

"It's okay, Mr. Red," Fez assured him from the passenger's seat. "I have a big bag of tootsie rolls we can eat while we wait, would you like some?"

"No, I sure as hell don't - "

"Ai!"

Fez's eyes blinked open suddenly as he gasped. Mr. Red and Mrs. Kitty stood above him. Who knows how long they'd been there - but just like in his dream, they did not look happy.

"I sure as hell don't want the foreign kid sleeping here again," Red was yelling.

"Hi honey," Mrs. Forman blinked down at him, more kindly. "Did you have a nice nap?" She laughed. "Well, now it's time to go."

"I-I had a dream," Fez explained, gasping for air. "And you were there," he pointed at Mrs. Forman, "And you," he pointed at Red, "And you," he pointed at Jackie and Hyde. They were walking out of Hyde's room, holding hands.

"I know what kind of dreams you have, Fez," Hyde frowned. "I don't want to be in 'em."

"I don't know what kind of dreams you have," Red grabbed Fez's arms and hauled him to his feet. "And I don't want to be in 'em either. Now get out." He shoved him out the door.

Fez was still contemplating his dreamland as he tumbled up the basement's icy steps, sucking in the frigid outdoor temperatures that reminded him he was no longer inside the Point Place mall - or whatever timeline his imagination had created.

"How do I get back there?" he frowned, smacking the side of his head futilely. To the land with the magic rectangles, and the lizard feet, and his happy friends, and never-ending tootsie-rolls?

It was an imaginary place, but it was a place Fez couldn't wait to get back to someday. Maybe tonight, in his dreams...

[jonathantaylorthomas]

Hollywood heritage...

latimes.com/sports/nfl/la-sp-chiefs-andy-reid-20181113-story.html

Andy Reid draws from California roots, and now brings his masterpiece of a Chiefs offense to face the Rams in L.A.

Kansas City Chiefs head coach Andy Reid grew up in Los Angeles and has frozen Tommy’s burgers flown to Kansas City. They’re “good for your joints — the grease. Keeps you lubed up, man,” he says.

(David Richard / Associated Press)

BY SAM FARMER

STAFF WRITER

NOV. 13, 2018 4:40 PM PT

Reporting from kansas city —  

Every so often, the artist comes out in Andy Reid.

It has nothing to do with coaching, instead those times when he puts pen to paper and allows his mind to wander.

“One time when we were talking on the phone, and he was telling me how much he remembered about when we were growing up,” said his brother, Reg, nine years older than Andy. “While we were talking, he sketched a picture of me, then emailed it. It’s just a sketch of my head, but it’s pretty realistic.”

Fans of the Kansas City Chiefs have a deep appreciation for Reid’s creativity. He draws up the offense for one the NFL’s hottest teams; finds new ways to harness the spectacular talent of quarterback Patrick Mahomes. Even now, in his 20th season as an NFL head coach, Reid remains a pigskin Picasso.

That figures. His dad, Walter, did jaw-dropping work as a scenic artist in Hollywood, creating backgrounds and props for film, television and stage production.

“My dad worked on all the Broadway plays that would come to the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion,” said Reid, 60, sitting behind his desk at Chiefs headquarters. “They had these huge backdrops they’d lower from the second floor, whether it was ‘Annie Get Your Gun,’ or ‘The Wiz’ back in the day. My dad went down and worked on ‘Hair.’ It was unbelievable. You’d stand up there and look over the edge, and if you took a wrong step, you’d go down like a mile.”

The Chiefs too have reached toe-tingling heights. They’re 9-1 heading into Monday night’s game against the 9-1 Rams at the Coliseum, moved there by the NFL on Tuesday when field conditions in Mexico City became unsatisfactory. On paper, at least, it would have been the most compelling international game the league has staged. Now it will be the Rams’ first Monday night home game at the Coliseum since Nov. 19, 1979, when 54,097 watched a 20-14 victory over Atlanta.

Reid has been in plenty of huge games throughout the course of his career, including coaching Green Bay’s offensive line when the Packers won the Super Bowl in the 1996 season. Reid coached Philadelphia from 1999-2012, led the Eagles to five NFC title games and a Super Bowl, then took over in Kansas City in 2013.

There’s still a lot of Los Angeles in Reid, who grew up on Holly Knoll Drive, just around the corner from John Marshall High, his alma mater, and Walt Disney’s first California home. Reid still eats Tommy’s burgers, and not just when he’s at his offseason home in Capistrano Beach. He has frozen ones delivered by mail.

“I love those things,” he said. “It’s good for your joints — the grease. Keeps you lubed up, man.”

Comically gruff and unrevealing with the media, Reid is beloved by his players, who refer to him as “Big Red,” his hair color at an earlier age.

“He’s actually more funny than you would think,” running back Spencer Ware said. “Most people think of him as just serious. I can kind of relate to him because I always kind of have a serious look on my face and people think that I might be mean mugging. Maybe I’m joking around. So I can kind of relate to Big Red in that area.”

Reid might show his lighter side to his players, but he also gets to the point. They appreciate that.

“The biggest thing is he treats us well, treats us with respect,” tackle Mitchell Schwartz said. “I know he’s got a hard training camp and practices are long and all that. But we don’t have 20-minute meetings every day with rah-rah speeches. It’s just, ‘These are the goals, these are the expectations. Now, it’s on you to go do them.’ So he doesn’t have to be up there every day trying to get us to work hard.”

Reid, a onetime offensive tackle at Glendale College and Brigham Young University, developed his work ethic at an early age. His mother, Elizabeth, was a radiologist, and his father got him occasional work in the entertainment industry. Once, young Andy got a job serving food in the green room of a popular TV talk show, and his rule-following ways clashed with one of Hollywood’s biggest stars.

“I’m not sure whether it was the Merv Griffin or the Johnny Carson show,” he said. “But they put me in charge of dishing out the sweet-and-sour meatballs — they were unbelievable — and I was told I could only give three of them out to people.

“You name it, all of Hollywood would come through those shows. I knew all the athletes, so if it was Wilt Chamberlain or one of those guys, they’d get as many meatballs as they wanted.”

But when John Wayne asked for more than three, the kid had to break the bad news.

“I found out later he was a great athlete,” Reid lamented. “Maybe I should have given him a few more meatballs.”

Reid was enormous for his age. There’s a hilarious video clip of him in a Punt, Pass and Kick competition in the early 1970s. He’s a 12-year-old man-child in a Rams uniform, with a line of kids behind him no taller than his beltline.

“The kid behind me was 8,” Reid is quick to note. “I was like 12 or 13.”

Whatever. The YouTube video leaves his players doubled over.

“Damn, that boy was huge,” Chiefs receiver Tyreek Hill said. “He’s the size of Justin Houston.”

Well, maybe Reid wasn’t the size of that 6-foot-3, 258-pound Kansas City outside linebacker, but he was big enough that when he was a waterboy at Marshall, some of the varsity players asked him why he didn’t join the team.

“Mike Haynes was between my brother and me,” recalled Reid, referring to the future Hall of Fame defensive back. “He and his buddies were riding me, ‘How come you’re so big and don’t play?’ I said, ‘Listen, I’m in sixth grade.’

“They go, ‘No way!’ It’s like, I’ve been doing this waterboy thing longer than you guys have been around. I’m like the professional waterboy.”

Haynes recalls that, and more.

“I remember that when our kicker would kick the ball through the uprights, our field was so small that the ball would leave the school property and go across the street,” he said. “Andy would go get the ball and bring it back. He’d wear his youth football outfit.”

Nowadays, Reid wears shorts to practice, even when the temperature drops below freezing. He’s spent most of his adult life in cold-weather cities and is hardy like that, an artist whose medium is now Xs and O’s, a Southern Californian in spirit only.

sam.farmer@latimes.com

.

[justinssportscorner]

Emily Stewart at Vox:

The first time I found myself wondering what the deal was with Aaron Rodgers was when his brother Jordan appeared on season 12 of The Bachelorette, which aired back in 2016. The quarterback skipped the all-important family visit, raising some questions, but instead of glossing over it, the show insisted on leaving an open seat at the table where he could have been. Reality TV’s gonna reality TV, I guess. Before that, in my world, Rodgers had simply been my team’s star quarterback, the one who took us to a Super Bowl victory in 2011. I do not claim to be the world’s biggest football knower, but when you grow up in Wisconsin, you sort of have no choice but to love the Green Bay Packers. Sundays in the Badger State are for two things: church and the Pack … and also beer and cheese, so, like, four. (As an aside, the Packers are the NFL’s only publicly owned team, another reason to love them.)

Family dynamics can be hard, I thought at the time, and really it was none of my business. But at the very least it seemed a little sad to think Rodgers was estranged from his family, and I did wonder why. Cut to about eight years later, and the quiet suspicion that maybe Aaron Rodgers is a bit strange has morphed into a very public, very loud conversation, now that we know, well, a whole lot more. Rodgers didn’t get the Covid-19 vaccine and misled people about it by saying he was “immunized.” He’s talked openly about getting into psychedelics and doing whatever a “darkness retreat” is. He’s had a string of relatively short-lived public romantic relationships, which is normal and fine, though his last girlfriend was maybe a witch? He regularly spouts conspiracy theories about Covid and vaccines and UFOs, among other items, and is chummy with Robert F. Kennedy Jr., an anti-vaxxer and presidential candidate. Last year, he challenged Kansas City Chiefs tight end and Taylor Swift’s boyfriend Travis Kelce to a debate about vaccines that was also supposed to include RFK Jr. and Dr. Anthony Fauci. Kelce declined.

Much of this oddball activity and commentary has taken place on The Pat McAfee Show, where Rodgers appears for “Aaron Rodgers Tuesdays.” Disney reportedly paid $85 million for a licensing deal to air the daily sports talk show on ESPN, which it owns. The Pat McAfee Show was the setting of the latest “Aaron Rodgers said what now?” incident, when on January 2 he basically implied that ABC late-night talk show host — and also a high-paid Disney employee — Jimmy Kimmel is a pedophile. It’s been a whole thing, with back-and-forth between Rodgers and Kimmel and ESPN and Disney, for days. Kimmel called Rodgers a “hamster-brained man” and threatened to sue him. An ESPN exec called Rodgers’ comments “dumb.” Rodgers refused to say sorry and responded that the exec’s comments weren’t “helping.” None of it was. [...]

The Jimmy Kimmel dustup is really just the latest in a stream of ??? what is up with this man

So, let’s get back to the Kimmel thing. In early January, Rodgers suggested the comedian had ties to the disgraced financier and late sex offender Jeffrey Epstein. Referring to a since-released set of court filings about Epstein that have been branded the “Epstein list,” Rodgers said, “there’s a lot of people, including Jimmy Kimmel, that are really hoping that doesn’t come out.” There’s previously never been any speculation that Kimmel had ties to Epstein — but he has been trading barbs with Rodgers for a while, focused on the athlete’s anti-vaccination stance. Kimmel was not thrilled at Rodgers’s little Epstein theory. He clarified on Twitter/X he never had any contact with Epstein, said the remarks had put his family in danger, and threatened to sue. Kimmel also did a monologue about the sports star. Rodgers responded on McAfee. He said he was glad Kimmel wasn’t on the Epstein list and isn’t “stupid enough” to actually accuse someone of pedophilia without evidence. Rodgers didn’t apologize, but he did offer up a strange but fairly accurate self-assessment. “I’m not a super political person, okay? Do whatever you want. Conspiracy theorist? That’s fine, because if you look at the track record of conspiracy theorists in the last few years, they’ve been wrong about a lot of things,” he said. And then he complained about the media and cancel culture and said he does not “give a shit” about what people say about him, which … sure. Finally, on Wednesday, January 10, McAfee said that Aaron Rodgers would no longer be appearing on his show for the rest of the NFL season. He said the show was “very lucky” to get a chance to talk to Rodgers and that he’s obviously a “massive piece of the NFL story” and acknowledged “some of his thoughts and opinions … do piss off a lot of people.” McAfee sounded relieved to be away from the drama. “I’m pumped that that is no longer going to be every single Wednesday of my life, which it has been for the last few weeks of my life,” he said.

NFL star QB Aaron Rodgers has been getting into hot water in recent years, and it's because of his off-field activities such as trafficking in COVID conspiracies and anti-vaxxer nonsense. At least some of these were said on The Pat McAfee Show, where he is a regular guest.

[packernet]

New Post has been published on https://www.packernet.com/blog/2024/11/17/packers-cant-lose-to-the-bears/

Packers can't lose to the Bears

As much as they tried to lose today’s game to the Chicago Bears, the Green Bay Packers simply couldn’t do it. No matter how hard they try, the Bears just cannot beat the Packers. Today’s loss has to be one of the most painful in the100-plus years of this rivalry. The Packers had no business winning this game, and yet it happened. Jordan Love led another game-winning drive and literally took things into his own hands on the game’s last two plays.

Love’s touchdown run gave the Packers a one-point lead after the conversion failed but left way too much time on the clock for the Packer’s defense, who couldn’t get off the field all day. They are living on the edge and with the 49ers, Dolphins and Lions on deck, that is a scary place to be.

It could have been over at halftime

The Packers offense started out well. After taking the opening kickoff the Packers went 65 yards for a touchdown. Love hit Jayden Reed on a free play and the Packers were off and running. The Packers held the Bears to a field goal on their opening drive and after exchanging punts the Packers were about to put the Bears away with a second-and-one at the Bears’ five yard line. Not to be. An ineligible man downfield penalty and a horrible five yard loss on some kind of power end round left third-and-eleven at the 15. As has been his wont, Love throws off his back foot off target and his picked off at the one on the next play. The Bears naturally marched right down the field for the their first touchdown in three weeks.

The Bears’ new offense picked apart the Packers’ defense to the tune of 391 yards and 36:21 time of possession. How they held them to 19 points is beyond me. The Bears really did simplify things for Caleb Williams this week, a lot dinking and dunking so it took a while to drive the field.

On offense the Packers did look better. Love is clearly back to full strength as evidenced by his two runs to give the Packers the lead late. And Christian Watson had a huge game, including a 60-yard catch and run to setup the go ahead touchdown. Josh Jacobs continues to be a beast in the ground game. The Packers were inside the Bears’ red zone in five of their seven possessions but only scored three times. That has to be fixed.

A win is a win and it’s on to San Francisco, who lost today and is now 5-5. It would be nice to beat them and maybe not have to face them in the playoffs this year. But we’ll worry about that later. Time to read all the Chicago newspapers again. Two weeks a year they are glorious.

[crackedrockskunta]

ratella remastered: in the beginning.

old tumblr had some beautiful fan fic of a homophobic ratty looking man from school, rewriting for the sake of all that is beauty.

i stand, stare and disbelieve the sight before my eyes, I am finally graduating high school and while I am more terrified than ever of what is to come, I know that this is going to open my chances of not only accomplishing everything I've ever wanted, but becoming the girl I was meant to be.

all my life I knew I was different, ever sense I was enrolled into the cheese nibbler academy for divergent and violent rats in kindergarten I knew that something was off about who I wanted to be. off about how when I looked at the most beautiful girls in my class, I felt not a sense of love or sweaty hands and typical childhood emotions, but a feeling of intense and unfixable envy. I pushed this as deep as I could, assuming the alpha male position in my school years binge influences by the works of the most inspirational men I could find to repress my identity. Ben Shapiro, Andrew Tate and of course Dreamybull. but thought my elementary school these urge to dress and act more feminine and truly my self did not dissipate, this caused me to repel against all of my natural instincts I was taught at the academy.

so I turned to violence, bullying every smaller rat, mouse and my biggest achievement the eldest neighborhood Cat Maswon Gyatfreigh after I almost fell victim to eating from his litter box. this continued through my young adult life, but no matter how many fights I started and then lost to or how bruised and bloody I was, I always felt an invisible pull towards something more, something I couldn't ever put my finger on as a source for all my hurt and anger.

it wasn't until I was in my last years as a little nibbler that I had finally met my match, my legs never got any bigger but my ego sure did, eventually leading to me finding the man who I realize now changed my life for the better. I was in the hallway at the academy and one of my notorious rivals "the Parm packer" challenged me to a dual which I could not refuse, I began to fight with my friends around me and fully beloved I should take him on, but within 5 seconds I was swept off my feet by his big strong arms. as he began to jump on my head, I felt my skull bang against the floor and the flashes of the cameras were exaggerated beyond anything I had seen, but with one last bang he was pulled away from me and my saving grace was there, the dean of students Melty Briar was there scooping me off the floor and showing the cameras away.

in the days following I came to the most shocking realization I ever had, I was not me. well I was of course but in the way that my body matched my face and my face my hair, but where does my soul fit there? in short, it didn't. I only had a few more years at the academy To go, but after the continuous fighting I was forced to leave for my own safety. while I was home I tried to body build but no matter what I did I never felt like anything of any meaning was changing the way my own soul did not fit into my body. it hit my like a truck 2 weeks after the fight, I just was in the bathroom one day looking down in the shower, slicking my wet fur with soap when the thought went across my head. "imagine I you just had some more curve there?" it seemed innocent enough and I assumed it was just more muscle definition so I started following workout videos on how to grow my hips, glutes, and shrink my waist, this was all rationalized in my head. I had found something I was happy with and it was always a bit more, a bit less there, all until the first time I got misgendered at the grocery store. I couldn't help but like it, even online I had started to go by my name now "Ratella" but there was no way I was a woman, right? was there?

[sweetmusingss]

Charles keeps his hands on either side of your face, gazing deeply back into your eyes. “It’s a little too late for that now, Renee. I can’t go back to hating you. I am not sure if I ever did to be honest.. You have always driven me crazy but now I see it as a good thing. Sure, life can be scary when you don’t have a set plan but where is the romance in having your whole life and relationship planned out for you? Being spontaneous is romantic and being kept on your toes can be the best thing. I want to be the one you choose. Isn’t it telling that you feel more passion with me than you do with him? Stop listening to your head and listen to your heart. Sure, my head tells me this is a horrible idea and your brother is going to murder me… but I cannot stay away from you. I don’t want to. I need you more than I have ever needed anyone and it’s fucking terrifying…”

This is what I had been waiting my entire life for, to find someone who needed me and wanted me. Charles was right, I needed to stop being so analytical and logical about my future and love, I needed to listen to my heart and just give into what the universe had been telling me since I stepped foot in his home 2 weeks ago. I was about to lean up to kiss him before my phone was blasting in my purse, quietly cursing myself as I pull it out, expecting to see Max or Katie’s name but it was my friend Charlotte and I immediately groan. “Fuck, I forgot my friends from school were coming tomorrow for the week...” I ignore the call, knowing this was far more important than dealing with my friends, looking back up at Charles. “Please, give me time, Charles... I’ve been waiting my whole life for someone to want me the way you want me but I just... I need to think about it, okay? Go back in there, I’m gonna go home and prepare for my friend’s arrival.” I didn’t even notice that I referred to Charles’ house as ‘home’. I give him a stern look as he goes to open his mouth, already knowing exactly what he was going to say. “Don’t argue with me on this. You can’t leave with me without it being obvious what is going on. Tell them the truth, about my friends and that I needed to leave suddenly. I’ll see you back home.” I lean up, kissing his cheek and letting my lips linger. “Nous pourrons en parler plus longuement ce soir, d'accord ?”

__

I smile softly in your direction before looking back at Renee. “Could you please let me know where my room is? I don’t need muscles over here stealing my best lip glosses,” I tease. I couldn’t deny that it was nice to have a man actually carry a bag for me without me having to ask. You seemed like such a gentleman and it definitely impressed me. You were apparently grumpy but I found you very easy to talk to. “Also, excuse me for wanting to have options,” I say, always a bit of an overexcited packer. I bantered with you easily, amusement in my eyes. 

Chris and Renee shared a secret look, the two of them having cooked up their own little plan. They were both individually sick of their best friend dating idiots and stupid people, and they knew that the two of you would be perfect together. “Since Chris’ siblings are coming, with their significant others, they’re getting the bigger rooms so... that means you two are stuck sharing a room. It has two beds though, I promise! They’re just... twin sized. Lets go!” Renee quickly grabbed one of your bags before making her way towards the staircase.

Seb listened to what Renee said and his eyes immediately went to Chris, narrowing them at him. “I have to share a room? I’m the best man and I’m delegated to sharing a room and a twin sized bed? I flew down here to America’s armpit for this? I could’ve just come the day of the wedding!” Seb was known to be a bit melodramatic, he was a writer after all, and he was known to be grumpy.. put those two things together, sometimes he came off a bit... rude. “She’s gonna hog the entire room with all her stuff!” 

[radiance1]

Superman, flying down to Lex Luthor's office: Luthor!-

Vlad and Lex Luthor pausing their argument as they look at Superman:

Superman, who didn't think Luthor was physically talking with anyone because he didn't hear a heartbeat: Oh, oh. I'm sorry you can continue, I'll just wait here.

Vlad, nodding his head before glaring at Luthor as he pointed at Superman with a wing: Well, at the very least, your nemesis has some sense of manners. Unlike a certain bald businessman.

Lex Luthor, bringing his head down in his heads and sighing: For the last time, I am not bringing you to a Packers game.

Vlad: And why not?!

Lex Luthor: It would most certainly ruin my reputation.

Vlad, currently staring at Luthor like he just told him he killed his firstborn: Ruin your repu- do you have any clue as to what you are insinuating?! The Packers would never ruin your reputation, they certainly haven't when I went to their games.

Lex Luthor: I tire of this conversation.

Vlad: Don't you dare-

Lex Luthor taps his bracelet and Vlad disappears. Leaving Luthor alone with Superman, a Superman who looks both confused and amused at Luthor's predicament.

Superman: So.... are you going to tell me who that was or?

Lex Luthor, groaning and dropping his head in his hand: You don't need to know.

Meanwhile, in another city:

Danny, resting on Tim's shoulder: Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim. I wanna go to the Observatory agaaaaaaaain.

Tim, tilting his head: But you just went there yesterday?

Danny: I know, but I've been deprived of the stares for centuries, so please?

Tim, shrugging in a way that doesn't displace Danny from his shoulders: Sure.

Danny, nuzzling Tim's cheek in affection: Thanks kid, you're the best.

===

Superman:

Vlad:

Superman: So-

Vlad: And what could you possibly want, oh proclaimed Man of Steel.

Superman: I just wanted to know who you are?

Vlad: I am the Duke of the Black Flame, Duke of the Ghost Zone and the most powerful, elegant, and graceful phoenix you will ever lay your eyes on in your most pitiful life.

Superman: Right. So, why are you with Luthor, then?

Vlad: Because, that bald-headed fool is my current 'master'. I say, I am most certainly not his underling but how dare that mere mortal deny one such as me a request as simple as partaking in watching a Packers game in real time!? [Vlad ends it off with angrily flapping his wings]

Superman:

Superman: If you want, I could take you?

Vlad, scoffing: And why would I believe that an enemy of my current bearer, would ever so much as wish for my enjoyment?

Superman, shrugging: I mean, if you don't want to go...?

A moment of silence.

Vlad: Do you even have the money.

Superman, smiling: I do!

Meanwhile, a few days later in Lex Luthor's office: It's been awfully quiet today.

Lex Luthor: God must finally be favoring me.

Meanwhile, in another city:

Tim, shouting out into his manor: Dannnnny, I have something for you!

Danny, appearing through a wall: Yes?

Tim, doing a come here gesture: Come here!

Danny, flying down to where Tim is: Alright, I'll bite. What do you have for me?

Tim, smiling: Close your eyes.

Danny, letting out an amused snort: Sure kid.

Tim, puts something on Danny: You can open them now.

Danny:

Danny: Is this... a space cape? How did you even-

Tim, beaming: Now you can be all cool and mysterious in something you like!

Danny:

Danny, who feels like his heart is going to explode: You're way to good to me, kid.

Tim feels like it's the least he can do, considering that that's his best friend in the entire world. Danny, in return, makes him and ice replica of Tim and Danny, a miniature version so he can carry it around anywhere and a bigger version that has a Danny much closer to his true size.

I for the life of me cannot find my og post but I shall take the concept and what I remember from it and make this one. So, snippets from that one au inspired by the Kwami from Miraculous Ladybug.

For context, Danny and Vlad are trapped in a necklace and bracelet (iirc) and are both just miniature versions of themselves, an eastern dragon and phoenix respectively.

===

Vlad, standing on Lex Luthor's desk with his head raised and a haughty look in his eyes: If you, a mere human, wishes to use my power, you will have to prove yourself worthy of the barest dregs of its embers-

Lex Luthor: No.

Lex Luthor taps his bracelet and Vlad gets sucked back in, finally leaving Lex's office blissfully silent.

Meanwhile, in another city:

Danny, currently flying near Tim's head as he takes up a camera: Hey, hey kid. Wanna use my power?

Tim, currently checking over his camera: Would it help me keep up with Batman and Robin more easily?

Danny, blinking as he questions what the hell is a Batman and Robin in this context: Yes...?

Tim: Deal.

Danny, blinking once again as he thought 'Huh, well that was easy'.

===

Lex Luthor, currently in an elevator minding his own business on his way to a shareholder meeting:

Vlad: Luthor.

Lex Luthor: What is it now.

Vlad: We need to go somewhere.

Lex Luthor, raises eyebrow: And that somewhere is?

Vlad: No time to explain but we need to go.

Lex Luthor, questioning how he ended up in this situation: You are aware I have an important shareholder meeting, yes?

Vlad: I know, and I don't care, you can always reschedule those things, but this is more important than that.

Lex Luthor: What could possibly be more important in your eyes?

Vlad, voice barely above a whisper: The Packers.

Lex Luthor:

Lex Luthor: No.

Vlad: You will not deny me this, I have been deprived of them for hundreds of years and I will not be denied the chance to watch them once again.

Lex Luthor: You say hundreds as they haven't been around for a century.

Vlad: Interdimensional time hijinks, not something someone like you would understand but that is besides the point. You will take me to the Packers game currently happening right this instant.

Lex Luthor, fixing his tie: I certainly have no incentive to do so.

Vlad: I will give you a portion of my power if you take me.

Lex Luthor:

Vlad:

Elevator:

Lex Luthor: Truly, a tempting offer-

Elevator: Opens

Lex Luthor, walking through the doors while tapping on his bracelet: -But no.

Meanwhile, in another city:

Danny: Kid, boy, child.

Tim: My name is Tim.

Danny: Right, yea, Tim, Tim, Tim, Tim.

Tim, currently standing on the counter as he looked through the cupboard: Yea?

Danny: I saw an observatory while you were out looking for those Batman and Robin dudes.

Tim, taking out some ingredients and checking to see if they're still good: Go on.

Danny: Take me.

Tim: Sure.

Danny, flying loops in the air: Yes!

Tim: But after I finish cooking.

Danny:

Danny: Can't you just buy something on the way?

Tim: Yea but if I do these will go bad.

Danny: Fair.

===

[73ironath]

WASHED CLEAN

As we all look forward for a special place and persons to meet after this time out, it would be proper to consider this story as told by Boyd K. Packer. As it may be the kind of response by those who we shall meet at the gate before we enter in.

"It was crowded and so we join the long line waiting to be seated. I was the first just behind some well dressed women. Even without turning around, the stalely woman in front of me soon became aware that we were there.

She turned and looked at us. Then she turned and looked me over from head to toe. There I stood in that sweaty, dirty sooty wrinkled uniform. She said in a tone of disgust. "My what untidy men."..I felt as dirty as I was uncomfortable and ashamed."

It is a custom among men, that when we are invited to a feast, we put the best clothes. The clothes are always clean and beautiful and it does attracts. But to our spirits bodies that carries our flesh, the best clothe many of us do not wear - the spirit.

When worldly conscious, the clothes attracts; as Satan will whispers some words has led so many to defile their spirits. This is one of the worst sins the spirit can't bear. Such defilement make the spirit to proclaim: "My what untidy man! woman!

The withdrawal of the spirit energize Satan to enforce his Entourage to dominate the defiled flesh, inspires with his silly wisdom, to cover ones wickedness.

As one defiled the body, ones spirit comes down, tongues contaminated, life disorganized, pure revelations become vague.

Many have become slaves to Satan because they did not continue as they once started, light-minded, and material thing

With the covenant, pure sermons and the laws kept and the application of the atonement we can washed clean and experience this at the last day: Joseph F. Smith

"Had a dream..as fast as I could possibly do.. finally came to a wonderful mansion. As I approached, I saw a notice "Bath."..I went in and washed clean.. opened my little bundle and found clean white clothing.. put them on and rush to the mansion..I knocked, a man stood there (Joseph Smith). He looked at me a little reprovingly - Joseph you are late..I took confidence and said yes, but I am clean...

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[depressedhatakekakashi]

Kakashi is transgender in the ‘i say i’m a boy and that’s it’ way

Is he going to put in effort to look a certain way? Absolutely not. you’re lucky he crawled out of bed today.

Are there days he refuses to wear his binder because it feels to constructing and that does bot mix well with a man who might have a panic attack because he saw his own Chidori and remembered Rin being skewered on his hand? Yes

Will he cut anyone who misgenders him? Without hesitation. Man is Anbu trained and ready to murder on command. And his reflexes are what’s giving the command.

He’s on T and has a packer and a Binder but if the day is just wrong and he’s feeling over stimulated or exceptionally crappy mentally, he might just choose to slap on his uniform and walk out the door looking like crap because it’s better than feeling like his chest is being compressed when he’s already struggling to not have a panic attack.

[inthememetime]

Inspired by Teenage Mercenary, a DC × DP AU in which Danny plays the role on Ijin except instead of a foreign country Danny grew up in the Ghost Zone after an ill fated trip wherein Jack, Madeline and Danny entered the ghost zone in the prototype Specter Speeder but failed to return. Instead of growing up with her grandparents, Jazz is taken in by Vlad and then one day an older iteration of Danny emerges from Vlad's ghost zone portal. Jazz bearhugs Danny and Danny hugs her back, in steps Vlad who also hugs his godson adding to the dog pile.

Vlad uses Jazz's preexisting attendance to Gotham Academy to get Danny into the school as a new student and Danny is sorted into the same homeroom as one Tim Drake.

Sorry for the delay on this, Shroud, I wanted to be able to give you something good instead of whatever hot garbage my fevered brain churned out. I mean, it might still be hot garbage, but at least I tried, you know?

Anyway

I LOVE this idea an amount that you probably expected. Let's start with the immediate effects and then push out to when he returns!

Vlad

The objects of his obsession (Maddie and Jack) are gone. Dead. He even goes to the GZ to find them with no luck; just a wrecked Specter Speeder, parts and pieces of Maddie and Jack, and a blood-soaked baby seat.

Understandably, his mental status is completely rocked. If he didn't have the (once minor) obsessions with family and custody of Jazmine, his core would've shattered.

All that to say: this is a Vlad more like the future one in the apocalypse during TUE. He's broken, barely holding himself together for the sake of this broken-hearted little girl, and is forced to move on.

Jazmine

Despite being only 3 at the time of the accident, she has a lot of guilt. She thinks she should have faked being sick, thrown a tantrum, ANYTHING. It takes years of therapy (hence her goal of being a psychiatrist) for her to internalize it wasn't her fault. She was 3. She wasn't even at the house, she was at a sleepover. How was she supposed to stop them?

Despite her (unfair) guilt, she moves to calling Vlad 'dad' pretty quickly. Now, when she thinks of her dad, it's our favorite Green Bay Packers fan. When somebody presses about her bio dad, she has a few pictures, some stories, and a vague memory of a man in orange buckling up her older brother for the last ride he would ever take.

She misses Danny, and often wonders what he'd be like if he lived. Her hardest day, besides the immediate aftermath, was her 6th birthday because that meant she was older than Danny (who was 5 when he died) would ever be.

6 year old Jazz had a very hard time.

Now, at 14, her main concerns are having to move to Gotham and leave her friends Sam and Tucker (not to mention the town she grew up in) behind. She spent the last half year in Gotham, but she thought she was going back to Amity Park

Unfortunately (or fortunately) for her, business is booming, and Vlad signed a contract with Wayne Enterprises that's slowly putting a certain evil billionaire out of business, and he needs to be in city. And she's 14, so she is, obviously, going with him.

Side note, Vlad grew up rich and in boarding schools. He had a Very Bad Time in boarding schools, so that's a no go for him. Also, his existence low-key revolves around his daughter, so he starts going a little canon-level crazy when he can't see her for at least an hour or two a week. (Thank you, Skype! She can enjoy summer camp as long as she has a reliable internet connection!)

Also: Jazz knows this. But her abandonment issues have abandonment issues, so she's totally fine with this: she gets to reassure herself that her only living parent is still (half) alive and healthy.

Also also: thanks to an unexpected vulture visit, she's known Vlad is a half ghost since she was 4.

The Plot Beggineth

Is Beggineth a word? I like it, so it is now.

She sneaks off to say a final goodbye to Fentonworks the week before they're supposed to leave, but Sam and Tucker have a feeling she would do that and follow her.

Most of this chapter would be somber, I think. Jazz visiting the Ops center, the kitchen, and every room to say a final goodbye because, tbh, she doesn't plan on going back here again at this point. She's finally ready to move on.

She tests the lock on the lab as always, and it's locked, but the hinges have rusted and pretty much falls over. Despite knowing how dangerous a maintained ghost lab is, she decends. A last goodbye to the ghosts who never, despite all the wishes and prayers, came to haunt her.

There's the wrecked Speeder, just as her dad found it years ago. The weapons cabinet, the lab tables. All untouched bexause her dad couldn't stand to be here either. She's about to leave when she trips over a Fenton Thermos and lands in the portal.

Despite being very careful standing up, she trips on a wire, and the fact her dad never shut off the power really bites her because she bumps the on button, and boom! Halfa!Jazz.

By this time, Sam and Tucker are there to see her death, and Vlad's not far behind since his wards were tripped when she entered. They're all a little too late.

Not only does the portal activation kill Jazz! It also acts as a beacon to a certain ghost who doesn't remember much, but knows his obsession lies on the other side of the door he can't cross. Until now.

Danny

Immediately recognizes Jazz, though not Vlad.

They don't recognize him either. He's had a multitude of ghost parents, so 4 arms (Pandora), horns (Frostbite), star maps on his skin (Clockwork), and- well, he looks like a neverborn.

Until he switches back, and he's the spitting image of Jack at that age. He knows things only Danny would know. VERY secretive blood tests prove that's Jazz's long (un)dead brother.

Jazz and Vlad are beyond excited to have him back, and so is he! Matter of fact, Vlad's a little confused at how such a gentle, kind boy (admittedly with a lot of sass) has (half) survived the GZ.

All that changes when Luthor does weird mind control on Superman to get revenge (not against Plasmius- he isn't in the know- but against Vlad, who is driving him out of business) (overkill much, Lexy?), and Danny takes him down in like...20 seconds.

Super speed? Well how does your super hearing like that Ghostly Wail? Super strength? Boy, he wrestles with the ghost of the Nemean Lion on the regular.

Lazer eyes? Frost breath. Catch two arms? Jokes on you, he's got 2 more and now you're in range.

Yeah. It's quick. Batman and the bats have to slow down CCTV footage to 1 FPS and it's still faster than the camera could track.

He always went by Phantom in the GZ, so that's his hero name! Vlad still tries to teach him- and learns a few tricks himself. They both teach Jazz.

Tim

With summer over, classes start again!

Immediately, Tim knows something is off. The new kid, Danny, is WAY too nice for Gotham. Yeah, he's sassy, but he'll also make friends with anybody!

Tim tries to teach him the ropes. This causes Danny to believe they're BFFs now, which Tim was NOT aiming for, he just didn't want the cinnamon roll to be murdered.

Only then Danny steps in with a school bully who Tim has just had to deal with because he can't reveal his combat training, and absolutely shreds the guy to pieces. Then, super friendly, gives Tim his backpack back and wants to know if Tim knows any good burger joints in the area.

Detective mode: activated! Tim (thinks he) figures out that this is a Jason Situation. He resolves to keep an eye out on Danny to see if he has superpowers or nah.

Tim: I'll hang around him until I figure him out. Danny: new friend!

Danny starts showing up randomly. A fight breaks out while he's supposed to be in class? Nope, Danny's right beside him kicking ass, but his teacher says he never left the room, and the footage he (ahem) aquired confirms it.

Tim starts making a list of powers and panicking because a meta like this might be able to slow down even Superman! He'd be far more frightened if he knew half of the stuff Danny could really pull.

The Batfam thinks Tim has a crush. There's a lot of 'you can tell us anything!' speeches, Kate reminds him she's lesbian and it's ok with everyone else for some reason, even Jason gets to the point where he's just: Tim. Listen. Bruce is like the only straight person here, and frankly nobody knows about Alfred. It's cool if you want to bring him home.

"He's a meta."

"I'll make an exception unless he hurts you."

Tim thinks: ok, meta is fine. Turn him into a hero! Bruce thinks: ok, going to meet my son's boyfriend soon!

This is, by the way, the while thing. Everyone (but Tim & sweet cinnamon roll Danny) thinks they're dating. It gets to the point where Bruce and Vlad start inviting eachother over for family dinners in the hopes that their sons will just fess up, already!

Everyone (but Tim, Jazz, and Vlad) thinks Danny is either normal, or a meta with some speed and strength enhancements.

Tim tries to explain how dangerous he really is? YES, Tim, we GET IT, Danny is AWESOME and has great hair, JESUS CHRIST.

Hilariously, Tim and Danny keep getting kidnapped, and everyone from the Batfam thinks Tim keeps somehow overpowering metas to rescue them. Ghostfam thinks Tim is now In The Know.

"Hey Mr. Masters-"

"Tim, please, it's Vlad."

"Uh. Vlad? How did Danny get superpowers?"

"Oh, he died."

"WhAt?!"

Phantom and Robin keep teaming up to rescue Jazz, who is doing her best not to show powers so Lex doesn't have a reason to clone her.

Phantom/Robin becomes a thing. Danny/Tim is still not. When they find out, both families are FURIOUS.

"DANIEL JAMES FENTON-MASTERS, WHY ARE YOU CHEATING ON YOUR BOYFRIEND?!"

"TIMOTHY DRAKE, GET DOWN HERE AND TELL ME WHY RED ROBIN WAS SEEN KISSING PHANTOM?!"

Tim starts hanging around the Fenton-Masters more because NOBODY believes he and Danny aren't dating! Danny does the opposite- and both figure out eachother's secret identities.

This leads to further problems because: ok, he likes Red Robin, but he clearly isn't interested in Tim Drake. Ok, he likes Phantom, but Danny probably annoys him.

Tim gets Unmasked by Disposable Henchman #4, and (after getting rid of the others), Danny, to even the score, shows that Phantom and Danny are the same person too.

This leads to further drama. You'd think everything was solved, wouldn't you? Nah. "Dad, please stop yelling at me. Tim IS Red Robin." "Oh, that's a load of licorice, Danny, you're grounded."

"Bruce, everybody- I'm tired of this, so here: Danny IS Phantom." "So now you're lying to your BF AND to us?!"

Finally, they unmask in front of each other's families. Problem solved, right? Right! Except Jazz is kidnapped now, and there's this new scary blue meta looking for a ghost kid, and- shit's complicated.

But that's (realistically) where I'd go with it- romantic comedy/ crouching tiger hidden dumbass style.

All in all:

Danny? Genius when it comes to fighting, the GZ, and math. Dumbass for anything else.

Tim? Genius when it comes to detective work, fighting, and breaking and entering. Dumbass when it comes to human interaction.

Danny AND Tim? Bisexual Disaster Squad for the win!