#man told he is too genetically fucked up ti have a child

[tothesolarium]

Experiment on animals? No no no. Growing things from his own cells? Harvesting his own brain cells ?? Absolutely!

51 is a very grounded scientist

[captain039]

A lioness

Logan x reader (wolverine)

Warnings: Gore, sweating, placed in Logan, character deaths, intimacy, angst, age gap, anxiety, anxiety attacks, mentions of needles

18+

You aren't related to Wolverine.

Your mutant thing:

The Lioness

Genetically made in a lab. A test subject. You were originally human and made mutant. They made your bones into metal like Wolverine and Laura.

You have enhanced everything really xD, cat like. Your finger nails grow into metal claws along with your toe nails, your quick and self healing.

You stared at the TV, you hadn't seen one in a very long time. You flicked through the channels admiring the moving picture. Your leg bounced though and your heart was too quick. You kept looking out the window every minute hoping no strange men would show up again. Your mind always flashed back when you looked outside. Flashed back to the moment you were stolen from your home.

“Y/n!” you heard a hushed cry. You jolted away seeing your mother crawling in. You shot up and went to her, her stomach area full of blood.

“Mum!” you said but she covered your mouth.

“Run” she whispered as her eyes closed. Lights blared in through the windows and the doors. Men shouted and footsteps echoed up the stairs as something hit you. Your body swayed your world blurry as the men continued shouting and rummaging.

You awoke with agonising pain throughout your body. You cursed and tensed trying to move. You heard panicked shouts around you as your world blurred again and went dark.

The second time you awoke was too soft beeping and less agonising pain. You felt a numb throb all over but that was it. Your eyes wouldn't focus and you kept rolling your head side to side.

“She’s awake sir” you heard a woman speak.

“Good” a man this time answered. Your eyes finally focused, it looked like a hospital room only- more creepy. You looked around saw needles in your arms as your heard sped up.

“What’s going on?” Your anxiety was kicking in, you hated doctors, hated needles.

“What’s happening?!” You shouted pain glaring through your knuckles.

“Sedate her now!” You heard as you began to thrash and cry. It was too late though the woman had injected something into your drip bag, the clear liquid going to a more creamy colour. You stopped thrashing, your words were slurred as you fell asleep once more.

You snapped out of your day dream as a car pulled up, you frowned seeing a man step out confused. He was in a large limo car, the hell is he doing here? You watched a woman come out and froze. The man didn’t want any part of her apparently as they fought, you saw a young girl also. You went outside your senses on edge.

“Sorry ma’am” the man spoke to you making you flinch.

“Y/n Y/l/n” you turned to the woman who spoke your name.

“You’re alive” she whispered.

“Do I- do I know you?” You asked as glass shattered.

“Hey! I told you to put that ball away!” The receptionist woman came out. The other woman gushed at her begged her to leave the girl alone before she sighed and went inside.

“My name is Gabriella” she said to you.

“I don’t know you” you said.

“I know you were under medication while I was with you” you froze, she was a nurse? Maybe a doctor?

“The hell you do to me?!” You snarled rushing forward.

“Hey!” The man stopped you a strong hand on your upper chest. You hissed at him and he raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t do anything! I was just a nurse, I was told to write notes, I worked at two facilities” she said making you frown. You were breathing heavily that uncontrolled rage boiling. You backed away from the mans hand glancing to him.

“What were they doing to me in there?” You asked.

“I know you have many questions, please come with us to North Dakota, Eden” she said making you frown.

“What’s Eden?” You asked.

“A safe place for your kind” she said and you flinched.

“My kind? I was a normal human before this fucking thing!” You snarled again.

“Calm down!” You glared at the man who shouted at you.

“All right let’s all calm the fuck down” he said as you paced.

“We need to leave now” the Spanish woman begged.

“Now please, 20 grand now and 30 when we get there” she said directed towards the man.

“Please Logan!” She begged.

“I’ll be back” he grumbled snatching her phone and putting something in it, a phone number probably.

“Thank you” she whispered as you stood there.

“Y/n” she called and you looked to her.

“Please come sit” she said beckoning you over to her room.

You sat with her trying to remember her face out of your brief moments of consciousness.

“I helped you get out, I dosed your medicine made you go into a frenzy in a sense and you escaped” she said making you sigh.

“What- what am I?” You asked.

“A mutant” she said.

“No I’m not mutants are born not made- this is a fuck up” you huffed leg bouncing again.

“Mutants are gone, almost all of them Laura here and other children were genetically made” she said softly pointing to the sleeping child.

“What’s she then?” You asked.

“She has Logan’s DNA” She said.

“The man with the big car?” You asked and she nodded.

“He’s a mutant?” You asked again and she nodded again.

“The wolverine” she said and you froze.

“The-“ you stuttered and she nodded.

“Your DNA is like his but they changed it somehow” you blinked at her words.

“Laura is his daughter” she said and you looked to the child.

“What does that make me?” You gulped.

“No, no your aren’t related, different genes different DNA” you let out a small sigh though it didn’t make you feel better.

“But I have- I have claws” you muttered.

“But you also have heightened senses, much more than Logan and Laura” she said.

“I do yeah” you mumbled running a hand down your face. You twitched slightly hearing a car down the road, a familiar type of engine.

“They’re here” you said as her eyes went wide. She grabbed her phone typing away as she woke Laura also.

You went outside waited for the two cars to come. Two big black trucks armoured, with armed men in side.

“I’ll be damned” you heard someone muttered.

“You’re alive!” The same man said as he walked up front. You stared at him, you didn’t know who he was.

“Our little mistake” he said and you glared.

“Y/n? Isn’t it? Yeah I was there when they were making you” he chuckled as your heart pounded and rage boiled.

“The lioness they called you!” He chuckled and you frowned.

“Though I really-“ you stopped his talking quick as you sliced through most of his men. Till they injected you with something.

You heard commotion and your world blurred again.

You awoke groggily, you groaned and shifted expecting to be tied up.

“Logan” you heard someone say and you jolted.

“Easy” you flinched as you sat up. You were in a moving car on some highway by the looks. The Wolverine driving beside you and old man in the back and the young girl Laura.

“What?” You began to shake and cursed.

“Logan pull over” you heard commotion but you were gone. You shook and cried as you curled into the door. Your mind flashed through everything and you couldn’t focus. The car had stopped you felt it, you felt being pulled out the car and onto the ground.

“Hey!” You flinched at Logan’s voice and turned away from him. You could make out speech between him and the old man but couldn’t focus on the words. You were whimpering, tears rolling down your face. When they injected you with this mistake it enhanced everything, your anxiety attacks included.

You felt arms go around you and you were pulled to a warmish body. You stopped shaking so violently and gripped the persons arm. You felt your heart slow down eventually, your body trembling every couple of seconds. You were exhausted as you went like jelly.

“They enhanced everything in her human body, her need to eat so much, drink, her emotions, her mental state also” the old man said.

“Get out my head” you whispered feeling him in your head.

“I’m just trying to calm you down” he said weakly. You gripped the arm the was around you and leant against their chest.

“I’m sorry” you said quietly and heard a soft grunt in response.

“We need to keep moving” Logan said and you nodded. He helped you back in the car and you leant against the door with your full weight, not bothered by the rattling and bumpiness. You were in and out of sleep, to exhausted from the attack you just had.

“We need a place to rest, Logan” Charles spoke.

“Damn it Charles” Logan said and you looked to him. He was gripping the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles white.

“We need food and a good nights rest no matter how risky, we won’t get far like this” the old man fought. Logan smacked the wheel and gave in with a sigh.

You pulled into the closest motel, Logan went to grab takeaway and you went with him. You didn’t talk during your trip, you ordered a lot of food, gave Logan all your money, took your food and stumbled back to the car without a word. You began to eat stomach so empty.

“You gonna eat all that?” He raised an eyebrow at your three burgers, two chips, two hash browns and coke.

“Yes” you said with your mouth full. He sighed and rolled his eyes as he drove back to the motel.

You all ate in silence before Logan helped Charles into bed.

Laura came up to you, held your hand in inspected it. You were confused by the action and stared at her.

“She wants to see your claws” Charles said a small smile on his face.

“Oh- no you don’t see them” you faked a chuckled as she showed hers with a grunt.

“Oh” you said staring at the two knives coming out of her knuckles.

“Mine aren’t like that” you gulped.

“Also very painful-“ she gave you begging eyes and you sighed.

“Ok” you grumbled. You held your hand up and winced as your nails fell off and metal claws came through.

“That’s disgusting” Logan said looking to your nails on the ground.

“I know” you muttered as the girl looked at them in awe.

“I can do it with my toes too” you said and she perked up.

“Not today” you said chuckling softly and she huffed.

“Watch this” you said forcing your eyes to go into night mode. It made them dark and reflective before going back to normal.

“Cat senses” you shrugged putting your claws back. Your nails grew back, you didn’t watch trying to keep those three burgers, two cups of chips and two hash browns down.

“You’ve got three that come out?” You asked Logan and he grunted nodding. He was old looking, worn down, he sounded like a raspy wolf, grunting and growing all the time. Though probably a Wolverine seeing as his name is Wolverine also.

“Not as disgusting as my nails though” you tried to joke but sighed. Charles chuckled softly half asleep though.

“Get some rest we leave in the morning” Logan said sternly and you sighed.

You took Laura to the other double bed and tucked her in. You laid down, your back to them and stared at the wall. You had found others, but it wasn’t like you were expecting.

Next Chapter

[tempestsreach-blog]

Fuck Diet Culture

This is going to be long.  It’s going to be rambly.  It’s going to be sad.  It’s going to be angry.  There’s going to be language some people don’t like. I can’t NOT talk about it though. 

Fuck diet culture.  Let me say that again.  Fuck. Diet. Culture. It has taken such a huge chunk out of my life.  I have lost pieces of myself I’m not sure I’ll ever get back.  The only way to heal is to go through.  I can’t go back.  I have to move forward.  But I can’t do it quietly.  I can’t hide.  I can’t live in the same shame I’ve spent the last 40 years in.  Literally.  40 years of my life wasted to this.  I can’t bear to live the back half of my life in the same way.  What the hell is the point? I’m not going to write this in any particular order because all of the thoughts and feelings swimming around are snapshots of things in my life that diet culture has broken in me or stolen from me. A lot of you aren’t going to agree with me.  That’s okay.  Truly.  This is about ME.  This is to help ME heal.  You can talk to me about your struggles, your diets, your ups and downs, your successes and whatnot.  I am here for you in all of it. But I won’t diet with you anymore.  Never again.

Currently I am having severe knee pain.  One knee is worse than the other, but both are bad.  I should go to the doctor.  I should have gone to the doctor years ago for it.  Want to know why I didn’t?  My weight.  I have injuries from overuse and over exercise and I am terrified that I am going to go to the doctor and the first words they’re going to say are “Well, if you lost 20, 30, 40, 50 pounds, it probably wouldn’t hurt so much.” instead of listening to me, examining me, scanning my knees and HELPING me.  I don’t feel this way irrationally.  This shit happens.  I am in pain.  I don’t know how to get help without being told to go on another diet that will not work.

Because diets don’t work.  Not long term.  I am excellent at losing weight!  I’ve done it over and over and over.  Then I stop restricting, counting, starving, and pushing myself.  Then my body says “What the fuck were you doing?” and puts it back. I lost the ability years ago to know whether I’m actually hungry or not.  I eat too fast when I do eat because if I snarf it down super fast I can get it in before my brain says “You’ve had too much.  Did you count those calories?  How many miles on a treadmill will you do to make up for that?  Did you actually earn this meal?”

Every time.  Every meal.  Every morsel.

I have never been officially diagnosed with an eating disorder.  Only been told by therapists and psychiatrists that I definitely engage in disordered eating.

No shit.

Every diet under the sun.  Cabbage soup.  Phen Fen.  Weight watchers (MULTIPLE TIMES), TOPS, Noom, My Fitness Pal calorie counting, intermittent fasting,  and every whacky bullshit thing in between promising results.  I’ve purchased fancy scales.  I’ve even tried one that wouldn’t show you your weight, but the color of your progress in the app.  Here’s a hint… if you gain, your color is black like death.  I’ve failed a million times and I’ve blamed myself.  I am the failure.  So I hate my body a little more every day and I stress about how I’m going to NOT pass my disordered eating and my food issues onto my kids.  My stress levels are through the roof and 98% of it is diet culture related. What the fuck is that about? Every time I start a program I hit it hard.  Last time I tried anything involving tracking or counting I was so starving by the time I got home from work that I almost ripped a child’s head off (not literally OBVIOUSLY) but I screamed at her at the top of my lungs because she hurt my feelings.  It wasn’t until after finally allowing myself to eat another morsel of food that I realized I was hangry.

Why is living in a larger body not acceptable?  We all talk about diversity and equality as though we believe it with our whole hearts, but that doesn’t cross over to fat.  Or skinny if we’re really being honest.  How many times have you heard or seen online “Oh my god, she’s so skinny.  Feed her a damn cheeseburger!  She looks anorexic.”  I know I have.  I know I’ve said those words.  I will punch myself in the gut if I ever say them again.  

Every body is different.  We are supposed to be.  Let’s not BLAME genetics like it’s a bad thing.  Let’s realize that it’s what nature has intended.  My father is over 6 feet tall and a large man.  He’s just a big man.  He went on Nutri System when I was young, lost a ton of weight, and put a bunch back on over the years because he is a big man.  My mother was not tall, but was always large.  I hated her body because HER PARENTS told her all the time she was fat and unworthy and cautioned me not to grow up to be like her in any way.  Even when she was poor and homeless she was still large.  That was the way her body was.  I wonder how different her life might have been if the size of her body hadn’t been a factor in the way she was raised or treated.  How might that have made my life different?

I know a lot of you are probably rolling your eyes at me right now about being vocal about another health plan or saying to yourself “just because you have trouble with diets doesn’t mean they don’t work”  I know there are people close to me thinking “She just always gets excited when she discovers a new diet, that’s probably what this is.”  NO.  

This is me finally realizing that I can heal and healing doesn’t mean I need to weigh 157 pounds. (That’s the weight limit for women my height to enter the air force when I did in 1992) This is me finally realizing that I’ve been lying about the weight on my drivers license for 30 years because gods forbid anyone saw my real weight on that document. This is me realizing that I’ve spent my life trying to live up to other people’s ideals of what I should look like because I assumed they wouldn’t like me otherwise. This is me realizing how much unintentional harm I could have been doing when sharing another diet, another idea, another bout of “well this is working really well for me!” with people I care about. This is me realizing how much damage I’ve been doing to myself living with this level of shame for 40 years. Hiding what I’m doing.  Suffering in silence.  Hiding food. Restricting.  Binging.  Over exercising to compensate.  Spending money on one last diet.  Spending emotional energy on one last hope. We were in Las Vegas for what was supposed to be a fun vacation last week and I was so hot and miserable and so steeped in hating my body because my painful knees were betraying me that my internal monologue was a never ending loop of “I’ll hit weight watchers REALLY HARD when we get home and get rid of this weight, then I’ll figure out my knees and work on maintenance” Let me say that again, clearly.  I struggled to enjoy my vacation because I was obsessing about restricting food AFTER my vacation. One last time.  One last meal.

BULLSHIT.

We walked by shops with weird and pretty fashion dresses. (I freely admit I don’t understand fashion) the husband and I would both point out ones we thought were pretty.  My brain would get stuck on “Yeah, but they don’t make them in my size” or “Yeah, that would NOT look good on me.  It looks fine on that size 0 mannequin”  Pretty on other people.  Other people are pretty.  Not me. Diet culture is pervasive and all consuming.  In big ways and little ways.  I’m 5 ft 9.  I’m not a tiny person at any weight.  I’ve always been told I’m too big.  Even when I sit, I slouch a little and/or tuck my legs and feet up under me to try to make myself appear smaller and less invasive.  This is subconscious.  I don’t always realize I’m doing it until my knees remind me. Most of my life has been things that get in the way of my diets.  “I should start the diet today, but it’ll have to wait until next week because so and so’s birthday is this week and I want to be able to enjoy that.”  or “It’s late fall, I should just start now but first there’s my birthday, and then Thanksgiving, and December happens and there’s all kinds of treats then.  Better wait until January, but not the first because that’s new year’s...maybe the following Monday.” or the ever popular “I already had a bad eating day today, I’m a failure.  Why bother?  Fuck it.  I’ll try again tomorrow.”  That one was always followed by binging because of the last supper mentality.  If I’m starting a diet tomorrow I better eat EVERYTHING NOW. This is how I’ve lived my whole life.  The time not spent dieting was just the time in between diets where I was planning my next diet.  So much life wasted.  The only time I was not actively dieting or planning the next diet or suffering from “I’m just too exhausting to put effort into food right now” was during my 4 pregnancies.  I let myself eat whatever and whenever because I was nauseous all the time anyway and something in my brain made me fuel my body for the babies. When the youngest was born and the on call doctor who delivered her told me I was too fat to have my tubes tied I definitely started planning diets again in that moment.  I believe now, years later, that my diet and diet culture ruined mind and body is part of what kept me from being as successful at nursing the kids as I wished I had been.  I assumed my body was broken and not good enough for my babies.  The last time I lost a LOT of weight it was because I didn’t want to ruin someone’s wedding pictures.  True story.  This was nothing that person felt or anything they told me.  IT’s what my brain said to me.  It’s how I de-valued myself.  There are very few current pictures of me now because I’ve been stuck in a place where I feel shame when I see them. When I’m dead, memories and pictures are all my kids and grandkids will have, and I hate myself too much to let anyone take them. That’s not okay.

I dream about food.  I daydream about food.  Food I “shouldn’t” eat.  Food I “should” eat.  When to eat.  When not to eat.  Every spare ounce of energy is spent thinking about food or hating myself which leads to more thinking about food. I am not in a place where I can prepare dinner for my family right now because it’s too hard to put that much energy into food.  I force myself to pick the recipes from the app and get the shopping done via instacart so all anyone else has to do is pull up the recipe and make the food.  If I’m looking at the ingredients or trying to prep anything I stare at every individual thing debating whether or not I “should” eat it.  This is going to take me a long time to break free from.  Today I finally feel like I CAN break free. There is nothing wrong with being in a large body or a small body.  Food is not good or bad.  Food is food.  I have to say these things.  I have to repeat them to myself or I fall down the rabbit hole again.  None of this is work anyone can do for me.  I have to live it.  I have to work through it.  I have to figure it out. If you read this far, my statement stands.  If you’re on a diet, I will listen to your woes and hold your hand and I will not judge you for it.  This was very hard to write because I am certain some of you who believe in diets, ways of life, and wellness eating may block me now because I spoke my mind.  I’ve clung so tight to the people I love and refrained from being honest and speaking my mind for fear of abandonment.  I’ll have to live with it if that’s the case here, because people sometimes need to do what’s best for them.  Airing this out is one of those things for me.  It’s a scary thing for sure. I also want to say that I’m happy for this to lead to discussion.  I’m not going to shut anyone down for wanting to talk to me about this.  I am always open to learn new information and see different perspectives.  Just know that if I’m emotional and feeling a lot of strong things about how my life has been up to this point, and I am entitled to believe what I believe just as you all are.  I’m happy to share sources and books I’ve been reading on the subject.  They are not diet books.

Here’s to doing better from here on out.

Here’s to finally being free.

[guesst]

some of the best fantasy au fics for bnha that i've read

i decided to make a fic rec list of one of my favourite aus/fusions. mostly midoriya-centric, there are some crossovers (with hp), and a lot of different ways in which the authors have taken them - so it could be Quirks, ghosts, outright fantasy aus, spirits, witches etc etc. there isn't a specific order and there aren't a tonne (these are the ones i could find buried in my bookmarks lol), but the ones on the list are all really well written i love them.

i've tried adding relevant information, the summary (shortened if it's pretty long) and just. adding some random tags that may be important. not all of them though. obviously this is not a complete list and there will most definitely be more fics out there, if there are some really good fics that you know that aren't on this list, feel free to tell me, i'd love to read them!!!

i hope someone enjoys these!

Faith Becomes You by SugaSuga

oneshot | gen dfo, quirkless midoriya summary 'There's a tiny shrine in Musutafu that's overgrown with kudzu vines between Izuku's apartment and his middle-school. There may very well still be a god inside it. There may be nothing but the myth of a man from when Quirks were first emerging. Izuku hides in its walls for a while and ends up tending to the forgotten shrine. All good deeds have their impact, don't they?'

Of Mythos and Men by Oceanbreeze7

oneshot | gen spirit animal au, kinda summary (shortened) 'When he was young, Midoriya always wondered what his mythos would be. The matching half to his quirk, the ancestry of its power. Mythos were strange things, not linked genetically like quirks seemed to be. [...] Midoriya hadn't met his mythos. Even in UA. (In his dreams, something called to him, 'Chase me!')'

what a lion cannot manage by LadyLiterature

multichapter | ongoing | f/m, m/m kitsune au, female izuku, future bakudeku summary (shortened) 'She wants to be a hero. Wants to save everyone she meets and even the people she hasn’t. [...] A smart fox avoids fights. A smart fox does not seek them out. A smart fox does not fight for everyone. A smart fox, when they absolutely must, only fights for themselves and what is theirs and nothing else. Izumi, for all that she tries to be, is not a good fox.'

My Magic Academia by Kiterou

series | oneshots and multichapter | ongoing | gen HP crossover, wizard midoriya, platonic bkdk, some ocs summary (shortened) ' [...] In which Midoriya Inko is a witch and Izuku a wizard and even after 150 years of quirks taking over the world, Izuku still couldn't tell Kacchan that he isn't worthless and that he still could become a hero all on his own.'

A Lonely Windchime Makes No Sound by Musecookie

multichapter | ongoing | multi reader/shinso, total fantasy au, very wholesome summary (shortened) ' [...] You enjoy visiting your slightly creepy local library. When you accidentally befriend the elusive owner's familiar, he begins to appear more and more when you visit. You don't really mind, and he doesn't seem to hate you, even when the two of you become tied up in each other's fate as you pursue the secret to reviving a magical species of flower. Soft Strangers to Friends to Lovers type beat with lots of fluff and naps! Sleepy cuddles included.'

The grapes of friendship by Gentrychild

oneshot | gen crack, dfo, vampire izuku summary 'Izuku, a dhampir hiding his real identity as he goes to UA, the best wizard school in the country, spends the day with his friends. None of them are aware of it.'

Yesterday Upon the Stair by PitViperofDoom

multichapter | complete | gen less supernatural, izu's quirk lets him see ghosts, he still has ofa summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku has always been written off as weird. As if it's not bad enough to be the quirkless weakling, he has to be the weird quirkless weakling on top of it. But truthfully, the "weird" part is the only part that's accurate. He's determined not to be a weakling, and in spite of what it says on paper, he's not actually quirkless [...] Not that anyone would believe it if he told them.'

sum of all (and by them driven) by Elemental

series | multichapter | ongoing | gen dadzawa, spirits give quirks, izu sees these spirits series summary 'Quirks aren't what you think they are.' first part summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku is medically quirkless, not technically homeless, perpetually exhausted and doing his damned best despite it all. He also sees spirits, which might be cool if not for the fact that a) no one else does, b) they really don't like him very much, and c) he's pretty sure the heroes now think he's a villain working for the League [...]'

The Struggles of a Modern-Day Vampire by miraculousemily47

oneshot | gen crack, 1-a shenanigans, vampire midoriya summary 'After Midoriya Izuku is turned into a vampire towards the end of his first year at U.A., he decides he wants to tell his classmates about his condition. The only problem is that he can't physically say the words, and his classmates are fucking idiots.'

Lights in the Dark by FrostKitten

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen supernatural au, izuku can see demons etc, quirkless/magic au summary (of first part) 'Midoriya Izuku, like most young kids, knows there are monsters. They live in closets, under beds, and occasionally in the park. As he grows older, his friends stop seeing them...but he still does.'

Hand in Unlovable Hand by jumbletea

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen vampire midoriya (and aizawa), dadzawa, toga n dabi n mido being siblings summary 'A collection of stories surrounding a not-quite-human Izuku and everyone he meets along the way.'

Simply Superstitious by CryCaladrius

multichapter | ongoing | gen lots of folklore and yokai and stuff, 'quirkless' magic user izuku, decent dad hisashi too summary (shortened) 'Izuku Midoriya’s father is a Hou-ou — a Japanese phoenix. For some reason, this means yokai have a standing invitation to pester Izuku with their existence. Birds assemble choirs for his birthday. If there’s no cedar leaf under the welcome mat, the amazake babaa that lives two apartments over will be knocking on their door by evening. His yokai-purifying excursions get mistaken for vigilantism far too often. [...]'

Cuckoo Bird (anonymous author)

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen it may be discontinued but theres lots of fae folklore, deku is a changeling, deals etc, plus some platonic shindeku building up?? summary 'There's something off about Midoriya Izuku. (change·ling /ˈCHānjliNG/ noun a child believed to have been secretly substituted by fairies for the parents' real child in infancy.)'

tread softly as you go by IceEckos12

oneshot | gen if you read any fae au please let it be this! has faeries but mido is not one summary 'Humans used to be good at the old ways. They used to know how to bait the trap, to spin a web of words and lies that would ensnare even the most wily. Humans used to be able to twist deceptions around knots of iron and turn them into weapons of power. They forgot a long, long time ago. A boy unwittingly makes a deal with one of the fae, severing his ties to humanity. However, he finds that the fae world is far more strange and complex than he ever could have imagined.'

Hell is just a shoujo manga by supercrunch

multichapter | complete | f/m fantasy au, bakudeku, fem!izuku, isekai, dekusquad stuff, also some iidachako summary (shortened) 'Izuku wakes up crushed under a statue, trapped in the body of a princess who doesn't exist. Turns out she's a demon, which is weird. What's even weirder is the déjà vu that surrounds Kamino palace, reminding her of the events of this one manga she used to love. [...] But that's probably just a coincidence. [...] The problem here, obviously, is that Izuku's the demon princess. Ergo, she's a villain. And that means she's going to die at the end of this manga. Again.'

hold your breath as you cross by cassiopeia721

oneshot | gen dadzawa, another 'quirks are from spirits au' (expect more of those actually), mido is sad :( summary 'As the bridge between the world of guardian spirits and the quirk users who are blessed by them, Izuku's duty is to clean up the mess his predecessor left. It's taken what feels like an eternity worth of work, but Izuku's finally finished, and he's ready to rest at last. Unfortunately, the pro heroes who just watched him take down the Scourge of Kamino have no intention of letting him just wander off, and he finds himself stuck in an interrogation room with a bunch of humans who he's sure will never believe a word he says.'

To See with Eyes Unclouded by CrazySatan

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen witch au, witch midoriya, quirkless mido, bkg is not a good friend series summary 'Midoriya Izuku is a witch. A powerful witch. And even though he doesn't have a quirk, and magic doesn't Work Like That, Izuku ends up a hero. Somehow.'

Demons and Darkness by wolfsrainrules

series | oneshots | ongoing | gen dadzawa, shinso and mido and bkg are becoming friends, they can see monsters/spirits/bad things summary of first part 'Izuku has believed in the things that go bump in the night since he was small. That means he can see them, and almost everyone he knows....can't. So he decides he's going to be the shield humanity needs, no matter what. Eventually, he finds others that See too.'

know what i've made by the marks on my hands by simkjrs

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen dadzawa, quirk spirit au (this inspired most of the others on this list), also eri summary (shortened) 'Midoriya Izuku just wants to lead a quiet, peaceful life. This is foiled by the fact that a) he can see spirits, b) his good nature demands that he help anyone he sees in trouble, and c) he, by all rights, should not exist. [...]'

Izuku haunts class 1-A by Artistic-Gamer

series or multichapter whichever floats your boat | incomplete (hiatus) | other there are some triggering themes! such as suicide, blood, body disfigurement! please take care of yourself and avoid reading if this will hurt you! in other news: so much dadzawa, so much friendship, hurt mido summary (of first part) 'Class 1-A is rumored to be haunted, only the residents are aware it’s more than just a rumor..'

U.A's Resident Ghost by BeyondTheClouds777

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | gen ghost midoriya, dadzawa, friendships!!!! summary 'There is a ghost at U.A. Not haunting U.A. Not even hanging out at U.A. There is a ghost. Enrolled. As a student of U.A. And it's just Shouta's luck that he has everything to do with it.'

and now, the weather by xylophones

oneshot | gen CRACK, paranormal/ghost hunters au, dekusquad stuff summary 'Izuku runs a fictional horror radio show. Because ghosts aren’t real. Right? (“Holy shit, ghosts are real,” Izuku whispers. Then, with the smugness of a sixteen-year-old who just won a decade long bet, “I knew it! Kacchan owes me five hundred yen!” “Midoriya,” Todoroki sighs, “this ghost is trying to kill us.”)'

U.A Unsolved by handcrusher(ameliafromafairytale)

oneshot | gen (it's a fic of a fic, so if you've read yesterday upon the stair then you'll understand better) izuku can see ghosts thats his quirk summary ' "Hey there, ghosts," Midoriya says, "it's me, ya boy." The dorms are haunted. Shenanigans ensue.'

The Haunting of Class 1-A by BritishRobutt

multichapter | ongoing/maybe discontinued | n/a ghost midoriya, vigilante au, crack, the ghost bit is izu's quirk summary 'Everyone always told Izuku he couldn't be a hero, so when he dies and discovers his quirk, he becomes a vigilante out of spite. Whoops. After becoming Spectre, Japan's most wanted vigilante, Izuku realizes he can just fulfill his dreams of going to the top heroic school- after all, who can physically stop him from attending UA when he's a literal ghost?'

Caged by SternStunde

oneshot | gen tododeku, fantasy au (todo is a dragon, mido is a princess), genderbent deku (fem deku) summary 'Then she held up one of the books and smiled. "Want to learn an ancient language with me?" She was kind of a nerd, and she really hoped the dragon was too.'

Magic Runs Deep by draconicschinx

multichapter | ongoing/probably discontinued | gen mido has a quirk and he can see mythical creatures. summary '"Midoriya Izuku has always been good at making friends. Not human ones, really, but they are good friends nonetheless. " Izuku can see and talk to and interact with mythical creatures. It's not exactly the quirk he was hoping for, but he's going to use it to help humans and his non-human friends all the same.'

[godkilller]

I'm not sure how to go about this, but after reading the interaction between Aizen (KEIKAKUDORI) and Rangiku (DOKUHAI). I had to wonder what the interactions would be if Aizen met Keiko. I don't know if this is an idea any of you would be interested in and I don't know if asking all 4 (3) of you would be appropriate, just a thought - and sorry if I ask you too much.

          out of character. ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT !! THE GIN IN ME FOUGHT ANSWERING THIS FOR SOME TIME NOW BUT I MUST RELENT. At last. Gin fought the good fight.

          So, if @keikoh ever met @keikakudori, Gin would absolutely lose his shit first and foremost. Keep his daughter away from Aizen, please. @dokuhai’s Rangiku is going to have to hold Gin back from physically sending Aizen into space with the power of his punch for so much as looking at his daughter. Overprotective father? Overprotective father. But in fairness, it’s Aizen, is Gin truly being ‘overprotective’ or simply protective? One should never assume it’s utterly harmless to even merely chat with the man. Aizen has an insidious way of uprooting or entangling people with a few choice words alone, don’t give him a conversation’s chance less you believe yourself immune to his sly ways. And chances are you’re not immune. Even Gin, at the end of the day, for all of his silver-tongued ways and manipulation mastery, fell prey to what Aizen wanted from him.

          Gin wants his daughter to live a life freed from that stain, even if it means ignoring her questions / a self-fulfilling prophecy of avoiding Aizen as a topic so much so that she seeks out answers on her own. Which is exactly the scenario that would have to happen, albeit still incredibly rare to actually unfold in Keiko’s favor considering Aizen’s locked in Muken and she’d have to be granted permission to visit. Gin being a reinstated captain lifted of all his restrictions post-Blood War means he would sense, know, and be able to act upon feeling Keiko heading towards Muken. You know he’d show up in a fucking blink if he felt that. You just know. Carts her back home by her ear. Tells her something about how “making stupid life decisions surroundin’ that man must run in my blood” -- and she’d have to be sneakier about it.

          But what is an Ichimaru if not a lil sneaky gremlin, right?

          Keiko is fearless, or even when fearful is determined to appear and act bravely. Internally, if she ever was to meet Aizen? Keiko would be understandably nervous, if not afraid, knowing from stories that this man almost destroyed Karakura Town and nearly killed her dad. But she’d want answers, namely ‘why’ questions as to what Aizen wanted, why he did what he did, why her father joined him, what Aizen and Gin did. Things Gin hasn’t told her, hasn’t elaborated on, out of his own fear and lack of communication that he’s still working on to this day. She’s generally going into this meeting wholly uninformed, save for rumors and whispers from the Shinigami population who were present during the Winter War, and even then? What happened between Aizen and Gin that day’s almost completely undisclosed. She’ll ask what happened, why, how, and what Aizen thinks now. Things that would make for a very interesting discussion if Aizen dared to humor her.

         There aren’t very many others, if any, who know what went down that day. Even Rangiku only came in at the tail end. Tatsuki and friends perhaps know an important slice of the picture, a notable moment in which they exclaim ‘hopefully they kill each other!’ whilst escaping Aizen’s focus because Gin intervened. From outsiders perspectives, Gin shows up, the kids run off, Aizen’s reiatsu drops dead, and then comes slamming back down a few minutes later. Gin’s cut down. Ichigo arrives. It’s easy to fill in the blanks with rumors as to why the two had a ‘falling out’ as Tatsuki and co. observed after Aizen defeated Gin.

          That’s as much as Keiko knows, and it frustrates her, because if anyone asks her about it, all hushed like gossip, all uninformed as she is, shouldn’t she know more about her own father? When people bad-mouth her dad, or bring up that he’s a war criminal, wouldn’t it be nice to know more than them? Gin’s betrayal of Soul Society and then his subsequent betrayal of Aizen aren’t just small moments to not know about. The traitorous trio’s rebellion against Soul Society’s one for the history books, and then one of the main reasons Aizen was both unable to destroy Karakura Town, as well as why he’s now immortal, is tied directly to Gin. Keiko may even seek out @njnth’s Tousen, who survived and became an outcast after the events of the Winter War, for answers. Gin wouldn’t keep her from him, either, because he knows that Tousen wouldn’t be malicious in his retellings, nor would he really want to linger on the past during his own healing. They’re both, for lack of better wording, recovering victims of abuse and trauma -- the topic won’t be carried along lightly. Gin knows and respects Tousen for keeping his answers to Keiko’s questions short and not... harsh.

          And Keiko would respect Tousen enough to know not to overstep. She wouldn’t hound the man. He’d be like an uncle to her. She’d be gentle. She’ll bring him snacks and sit out with him by his humble abode and I’m sure Tousen’ll get some deja vu with the days in which he sat with a young newly made Third Seat Gin, though as he’s said in canon about children, unlike her father, Keiko would be a pure soul.

          Speaking of souls and purity, I also have a headcanon that since Rangiku was canonly a Soul King piece host, and Tokinada's clan was all about finding those hosts and 'breeding' them etc. etc.  ( that’s a very rough description and I’m still a newbie at this other Bleach content )  in CFYOW ... -- anyways, with all of that said, it's implied that bearing a piece of the Soul King is a genetic-driven “gift” of some sort. Bearing a piece isn't promised, but it's heightened for people with higher reiatsu. So Rangiku's child would have a higher chance of housing a piece of the Soul King due to her genetics and Gin’s combined reiatsu with hers, etc. which is also what's within Aizen's hogyoku -- and it'd make for an interesting moment of, for lack of better wording, 'soul recognition' between her and Aizen and the Soul King / soul piece within the Hogyoku that Aizen harvested from Rangiku. The piece of Rangiku which is within the Hogyoku which Aizen became one with.

          It’d be a very interesting meeting with that subtle factor of understanding linking them together, indeed. If Aizen noticed such a pull, perhaps, then Keiko best be prepared for answering some of his questions, too, and we all know how much of a slippery slope that can become.

          TL;DR ... Keiko has the potential to open a huge can of worms, and she’s going to be grounded for a whole year once Gin finds out.

[tayman001]

GrimmIchi (post epilogue): Includes some Anime characters and an original character of mine also using Anime terms. 2

Taylor: The maximum amount of kids a man can give birth at one time is 10 and the number in general is random each time so...

Grimmjow (visibly scared): shaking uncontrollably Ichigo: Great Tay now you've freaked out Grimm... tries to comfort Grimmjow Taylor: ...you have to wait another month until we know for sure how many at once you'll be having but I will say this 10 is the rarest amount and only a lucky few ever get only that amount. Grimmjow: Then I hope I'm not lucky because I don't think I'd survive that... Kazui: Awesome so if it is 10 I'd have 10 younger half brothers! Ichigo: Kazui don't you see your Dadjow is freaking out. Kazui: Isn't he an Arrancar? If so than shouldn't his Hierro protect him from harm? Grimmjow (visibly panicked): Ichigo: Please go to your room Kazui because you aren't helping. Kazui goes to his room Uryū: If you want I can be his personal Doctor to make sure he doesn't suffer any injuries during his pregnancy, Ichigo. Ichigo: Sure, Uryū. Taylor: You'll probably say no but I can inject something into him specifically designed to allow him to survive just in case it turns out he is to have 10 kids. Ichigo: You sound like Mayuri with his experiments so no. Taylor: If you think its an experiment you are wrong so no I'm not mimicking Captain Kurotsuchi since I actually test my experiments on clones of volunteers that are specifically designed to run tests on so that actual people aren't harmed so no the substance has already been tested and is unharmful in fact it actually will make him live longer but if you truly don't trust me or my science then fine, if Grimmjow does and 10 kids and ends up dying you'll have no one to blame but yourself. proceeds to walk away Ichigo: Wait... Fine inject him with it. BUT IF HE ENDS UP DEAD YOU'LL BE DEAD BECAUSE I'LL KILL YOU IN COLD BLOOD! Taylor: If I wanted him dead I'd never have said anything. injects the formula into Grimmjow Grimmjow (feeling drunk): his words are slurd and are not understandable Ichigo: What the fuck have you done to him! I TRUSTED YOU! Taylor: That is supposed to happen idiot and its only temporary it does that so he doesn't feel any pain during the procedure. Grimmjow (still feeling drunk): changes are happening inside him that aren't affecting his pregnancy *moments later* Grimmjow (is an immobile slob): What happened and why can't I move? Ichigo: What the fuck have you done to him Taylor! Taylor: He needs that wait to survive the 10 kids since the pregnancy needs blood to give birth and as a result of the pregnancy any fat he has is measured in blood for the pregnancy so each pound of fat is equal to a liter of blood and each child needs 100 liters of blood to be used to successfully be born and for the pregnant man to survive with 100 extra liters per child just in case the procedure takes longer than the estimated time so in total for 10 kids he needs to weigh 2000 pounds which he now weighs well plus the weight he had prior and if you are worried about his weight the formula makes it so he never suffers health problems again and I even have a formula solely for the no health problems just in cause you were worried about your gluttonous appetite might lead to those and I have another formula solely for always being mobile. Ichigo: Yes inject both of those sole formulas into me then inject the mobile one into Grimmjow. Taylor: does just that Ichigo: Now leave... I wanna go order 50 boxes of Pizza. Taylor leaves and so does Uryū A month later Ichigo (pigging out on some pizza): moans and chumping Grimmjow (feels 10 things kicking inside him as they form): moans in pain Ichigo: Grimm what's wrong? Grimmjow: moans in pain Ichigo: Grimm please say something! Grimmjow: moans in pain call... moans in pain ...everyone. moans in pain Ichigo: calls everyone An hour later Taylor, Kazui, Uryū, Brandan, Rukia, Renji, Ichika, Chad, Noba, Orihime, Nozomi, Karin, Yuzu and Riruka show up Karin and Nozomi: Ichigo why'd you call us like I don't see why... Karin: ...Nozy and me... Nozomi: ...Kary and me... Karin and Nozomi: ...had to come.

Yuzu: Karin you do realize I was called to so don't go assuming Ichigo called you and your girlfriend on a whim since he probably has a reason for calling all of us. Chad and Noba: silence Rukia and Renji: Why did you call all of us? Riruka: I bet something stupid. Orihime: Maybe it has something to do with Grimmjow's pregnancy? Uryū and Brandan: Probably. Kazui and Ichika: But why were we called aren't we still too young to hear where babies come from? Taylor: I doubt that is why we were called here since if that were the case they would have only called the two of you not all of us. Shinji, Shunsui, Nanao, Momo, Suì-Fēng, Nelliel, Marechiyo, Kensei, Shūhei, Kisuke, Yoruichi, Rose, Izuru, Isane, Kiyone, Byakuya, Tetsuzaemon, Atau, Lisa, Yuyu, Mashiro, Tōshirō, Rangiku, Kenpachi, Ikkaku, Yumichika, Mayuri, Akon, Sentarō, Tatsuki, Keigo, Mizuiro and Chizuru show up Taylor: Hi, Captain Hirako, Head Captain Shunsui, Lieutenant Ise, Lieutenant Hinamori, Captain Suì-Fēng, Nel, Lieutenant Omaeda, Captain Muguruma, Lieutenant Hisagi, Kisuke, Yoruichi, Captain Ōtoribashi, Lieutenant Kira, Captain Kotetsu, Lieutenant Kotetsu, Captain B Kuchiki, Captain Iba, Lieutenant Rindō, Captain Yadōmaru, Lieutenant Yayahara, Lieutenant Kuna, Captain Hitsugaya, Lieutenant Matsumoto, Captain Zaraki, Lieutenant Madarame, 3rd Seat Ayasegawa, Captain Kurotsuchi, Lieutenant Akon, Lieutenant Sentarō, Tatsuki, Keigo, Mizuiro and Chizuru. Shinji: ...Taylor I told you, you can call me Shinji I don't care much about formalities. Shunsui: Hey Taylor. Nanao: You'll never get promoted Taylor if you slack off and don't do what your ordered to do! Taylor: Lieutenant Ise who said I wanted a promotion? Since I'm perfectly fine staying unseated even if I have the strength of a Captain. Momo: Nanao why not just let it go? Nanao: I might as well since he seems to have his mind set. Suì-Fēng (focused on Yoruichi and not realizing she is talking out loud): I wanna marry Lady Yoruichi! Yoruichi (hearing Suì-Fēng say that): flash steps over to her So its a promise then? Suì-Fēng (shocked and embarrassed): I, uh... Yoruichi: kisses Suì-Fēng Suì-Fēng and Yoruichi leave to spend some alone time Taylor: Well that was kinda unexpected but I had a feeling that info would soon come out. Nel: I fell on my face when I arrived since I keep tripping out of the sky Garganta. Taylor: If you don't look wounded than its clear that your Hierro is strong enough to protect you from the impact. Nel: True. Marechiyo: I kinda knew Captain Suì-Fēng was a Lesbian all along! Suì-Fēng returns and kicks Marechiyo so hard he passes out and needs medical attention Taylor: I would have told him to shut up but it was already too late since as soon as he opened his mouth I knew it was only a matter of time before this happened. Kensei and Shūhei: Yeah he can be a idiot sometimes. Taylor: Say how is your lives treating you after the two of you tied the knot? Kensei and Shūhei: Pretty good. Shūhei: And I'm Pregnant and he is due next month. Kensei: I'm still kinda scared to be a father. Since the last time I tried to handle crying all I could come up with was "Laugh or else!!!!" Shūhei: Yeah and that was 100 years ago when you were yelling that to me when I was a kid. Kensei: Yeah but I'm still confused on why you stopped crying? Shūhei: I saw your chest and 69. Kensei: Oh come here. Kensei and Shūhei make out Kisuke: I wish Tessai could have been here... Taylor: Why where is he? Kisuke: Hospital... Someone ran him over in a hate crime. starts crying Taylor: He is gonna be ok, Kisuke after all he is your husband and you know how strong he is. Kisuke (stops crying): Yeah you're right. Rose: playing his guitar Izuru: guarding the perimeter Isane: gets bumped into I'm sorry that was my fault. Kiyone: Isane its not your fault you were the one bumped into not him since he bumped into you. Byakuya: Ichigo Kurosaki why the fuck did you ask all of us here like really. Taylor: Captain B Kuchiki, I think it has to do with his husband Grimmjow's pregnancy.

Byakuya: ...wasn't he married to Orihime Inoue? Orihime: He was but I divorced him once he told me the truth so that he could marry the one he loves. Tetsuzaemon: Atau I'm gonna go take Sajin for a since he is is bugging me to walk him. Atau: does ok in sign language Taylor: Let me guess Captain Iba, you are taking care of Sajin Komamura who was your captain back when you were the Lieutenant of Squad 7 but who was turned into a wolf after using the Humanization Technique back during the war with the Quincy. Tetsuzaemon (ashamed): Yeah... Taylor: There is no reason to feel ashamed after all he was your captain for a long time and you still care for him and its not in your nature to leave anyone behind, now is it. Tetsuzaemon: That is true. Taylor: I can look at ways to reverse his condition if you want I just need to clone him genetically so he doesn't end up dying in case a formula doesn't work. Tetsuzaemon: I'll have to ask him. Taylor: If he is in the form a normal wolf he can't speak in any language that we as humanoids can understand so how can you understand his wolf speak? Tetsuzaemon: He taught me it when he was still a werewolf. Taylor: Oh. Lisa: Hey Taylor. question do you have Line? Taylor: Uh no but I have Facebook. Lisa: You should get Line! Yuyu: Yeah get line!~ Taylor: How about stop asking! Mashiro (using her Hollow mask): Mashiro Super Cero! Taylor: jumps out of his body, puts on his hollow mask and blocks the cero with his hand Mashiro: Big deal so you countered it... Here it goes Mashiro Drop Kick. Taylor: grabs her foot and throws her across the room Mashiro (dizzy): I was just getting started... passes out Kensei and Shūhei: She deserved that. Tōshirō: Why is it that everyone is so manic today? Rangiku: Relax Captain. Kenpachi: attempts to attack Taylor Taylor: cuts Kenpachi's arm off Kenpachi: Asshole! Taylor: I warned you never to attack me. Ikkaku and Yumichika: Well it looks like we need to take the Captain to Orihime again... Mayuri: I would like to test a new drug on you Taylor. Taylor: Too late you are already testing new drug of mine. Mayuri: Huh? Akon: Captain... Get off me your crushing me. Mayuri: Well now look what your drug did Taylor, I can't move and if I don't get off of Akon quickly I'm gonna end up killing him. Taylor: checking Akon's vital signs Nope he is lying in fact he is too ashamed to admit it that he is actually aroused by all of this and is in fact not being crushed to death. Akon: blushing Mayuri: blushing Oh so he likes this huh? Maybe this isn't so bad after all. Sentarō: I'm gonna go fight with Kiyone for old time sake. goes over to where Kiyone is to pick a fight Tatsuki and Chizuru: making out Keigo and Mizuiro: making out Taylor: Ichigo please tell me you didn't invite anybody else. Since I doubt this place can handle anymore people. Ichigo: Nope this is everyone. Kazui: Dad I'm sleepy can I rest on your belly until I can reach my room? Ichigo: Sure Kazui. Kazui: climbs onto Ichigo's fat belly and falls to sleep Ichigo: starts eating more pizza Hours later Ichigo (looking like a immobile blob): I think I ate too much pizza. Kazui: still sleeping Taylor: Well you aren't immobile even though you look like it. Rukia: GET THE FUCK UP ICHIGO! Taylor: Captain R Kuchiki there is no need to yell like do you wanna wake Kazui? Rukia: Oops sorry. Kazui: still sleeping so... comfy... love... dad's... fatness.... so.... soft...... Ichigo: Please tell me he'll wake up eventually since I don't intend to have him sleep only on my belly. Taylor: Depends on his actions. everyone eventually clears out except for Taylor, Rukia, Renji, Ichika, Orihime, Riruka, Chad, Noba, Karin, Nozomi, Yuzu, Uryū and Brandan Kazui: still sleeping Ichigo: Why has he still not woken up like did he fall in love with my belly or something? Taylor: That is a likely reason. Grimmjow: If he loves it why not teleport him in and have him stay there until I give birth to his half brothers. Ichigo: Yeah I'm not gonna risk digesting Kazui, Grimm.

Noba: I have that risk when I do my job as a living Taxi. So I release my passengers as soon as I start burping just so I don't digest them and they never reach their destination because of it. Rukia and Renji: Yuck. Chad: What's so yuck about it, its hot. Karin and Nozomi: We have to agree with Rukia and Renji since YUCKY! Yuzu: I agree with Mr. Giant since if my Future Husband went around and did that I'd be turned on by it. Uryū and Brandan: We are agreeing with Chad and Yuzu. Taylor: I like it as well. Orihime: Of course you would after all you made this Gigai for Noba since Kisuke decided against making them any new Gigai for the three of them... speaking of which where is Ririn and Kurōdo? Riruka: I wouldn't know since I have never met them. Meanwhile Ririn: showing off her new sexy look which she's been doing for years Kurōdo: showing off his new handsome look which he's been doing for years Meanwhile Taylor: I have a feeling they haven't stop doing what they said they were gonna do when I made and gave the three of them their new Gigai. Sometimes I wish that I didn't ask them what they wanted and just remade their original Gigai and only asked Noba what he wanted. Meanwhile Gō Koga returns to Karakura Town for the first time in years Koga: I really hope those kids don't assume I'm here for revenge. Meanwhile Noba: A Bount! Meanwhile Ririn and Kurōdo: BOUNT! Meanwhile Ichigo: But the only Bount left would be the one with the Doll known as Dalk the one who Yoruichi said Thanks me for defeating Kariya. Uryū: You think he is here for revenge. Taylor: Doubt it since I can sense him and based on his Spirit Energy he isn't here to fight in fact he is here for peace. Rukia, Renji, Chad, Noba, Ichigo, Grimmjow, Orihime, Riruka, Uryū, Brandan and Ichika: HUH? Kazui: still sleeping gay Taylor: Um.... where'd Kazui decide to say that out of the blue sure he is sleeping but still it must have been a reason. Rukia, Renji, Chad, Noba, Ichigo, Grimmjow, Orihime, Riruka, Uryū, Brandan and Ichika: Beats us. Gō Koga shows up in the house Koga: Sorry to barge in uninvited but I wanted to say sorry for my actions years ago... wait... I must have the wrong house since none of you look familiar. Taylor: The ones who you've never seen before are myself, Grimmjow the blue haired guy, Kazui the little orange haired guy who is sleeping, Ichika the red haired little girl with violet eyes, Brandan the auburn hair guy and Riruka the magenta haired lady with the magenta eyes. I'm pretty sure you remember Ichigo, points to Ichigo Uryū, points to Uryū Rukia, points to Rukia Renji, points to Renji Orihime, points to Orihime Chad, points to Chad and Noba. points to Noba Koga: WAIT HOW LONG HAS IT BEEN? Taylor: 10 years and 20 months since you and the other Bounts showed up about 3 months before the fight with Aizen took place and its been 10 years and 17 months since that fight with Aizen. Koga: ...I might as well leave since it seems I waited to long to apologize. proceeds to leave Ichigo, Rukia, Orihime, Chad, Uryū, Renji and Noba: There is no need to leave. Koga: OK if you... Ririn and Kurōdo show up Ririn: Stop there this is no place for someone of your kind Bount. Kurōdo: If you don't leave we will have to destroy you. Taylor: Ririn and Kurōdo back down he isn't an enemy any longer. To Be Continued

[akechicrimes]

Prompt 19 for Shuake? I read it and my brain immediately “̶A̶̶n̶̶g̶̶s̶̶t̶ Material for New Game+” (Just a suggestion)

19. “Do you want to know the hardest thing about having a soulmate? It’s not the separation in the beginning, not the endless nights lying awake, hoping and praying that someone was made for you. It’s…it’s the love. It’s too strong, and you can’t fight it. I’ve tried. Believe me, I’ve tried…but I’m always going to love you. And I need you to know that.”

summary: goro akechi meets his soulmate akira kurusu, falls in love instantly, and immediately resolves to kill him.

When Goro is twelve, he hates two people equally: his father who he’s never met, and his soulmate who he’s never met. When Goro is eighteen, he meets Akira Kurusu, falls in love instantly, and resolves to kill him.

***

“Oh,” says Sae, when he walks into work next. “Take the day off, Akechi-kun.”

“That’s entirely unnecessary--!”

“I will be liable in court if I make you work,” says Sae promptly, and before his very eyes, starts to move case files over onto his (very small) section of her desk. “You met your soulmate, you get a whole two weeks of paid leave. Goodbye.”

“I didn’t meet my soulmate,” says Goro, trying very very very hard not to snarl.

“You’ve got lovesick all over your face,” Sae replies.

Goro immediately pulls out his phone and checks himself in the front view camera, because Goro’s only dedicated entire years of his life to having perfect, flawless control over his face and public image and it’s simply not possible that one scruffy-haired teenaged boy who probably doesn’t even wear deodorant could undo all his hard work, but no, Sae’s right, Goro’s got this hideously piteous wide-eyed fawning look like he’s some kind of blindly dedicated fangirl star-struck over a local celebrity. Goro has the sudden compulsion to break his phone, and maybe get rid of Akira Kurusu’s phone number while he’s at it.

“Enjoy the honeymoon period,” says Sae. “Don’t come back or I’ll get sued.” She thinks about it. “I think you may have to still go to school. You seem to have met your soulmate unusually young, so you may want to check if your school has a policy on it.”

“Right,” says Goro. His fists curl; the leather gloves creak. “I’ll... go, then. If anything happens with the Kamoshida case--”

“I will not call you before two weeks is up.”

“How... very kind of you,” says Goro with determined pleasantry, as if she’s not booting him off the very case that Goro worked for two years to have an opportunity to even look at, not to mention the case that Shido will have his head for if Goro screws up.

Maybe Sae hears it in his voice, because she pauses, and gives him the neutral look that could very well pass as her smile. “When your leave is up, the case will still be here. You only get to meet your soulmate for the first time once. It’s a special time. You could try to enjoy it.”

Just then, Goro’s phone buzzes with a text from--ugh--Kurusu, speak of the soulmate devil: My school just told me to take the day off because of soulmate stuff, is that legal?? Goro’s heart jumps. Sae does smile then, in that smug, triumphant way she does when she’s just won a legal case. “Have fun,” she says, and in the reflection of Goro’s phone screen, he can see himself smiling against his will.

***

There’s nothing for it. Goro’s just going to have to kill Kurusu. Or put him in jail, or make him go psychotic, or hand him over to Shido or his cleaner friend for disposal. Whatever works. But Goro cannot continue on with this shackle around his throat.

Life is a series of unfreedoms: first you can’t choose who you’re born to, sometimes strung up with a bunch of birth complications, possibilities carved away from you by the map of your genetics and DNA predispositions. Then all the things you can’t afford: maternity leave, a good diet, child care, a good preschool. More still: Duck and bow your head to the social workers, the school teachers, the bosses who want nothing more than to fire your mother for the slightest mistake. Don’t speak too loudly. Don’t make eye contact. When your mother dies, you can’t cry too loudly at her funeral or it’ll make your aunt mad. No, you can’t afford the train fare to visit her grave.

And people have the nerve to say: Oh, isn’t it romantic to have been assigned a soulmate from the moment of your birth? Isn’t it wonderful? Isn’t it reassuring to have no choice in who you love?

Isn’t it the peak of romance that one day, you just look across a TV studio and your entire life gets turned upside down? The entire insides of your head gets rewritten according to some cosmic match-maker game. All of a sudden, you’d take a bullet for some shitty kid in glasses you’ve never met. And it doesn’t matter what you want; it doesn’t matter what you need. You love him and you can’t even hate him for it.

Isn’t that romantic?

Maybe Goro shouldn’t have been surprised when the public started thinking that a group of thieves reaching inside the heart of another person and forcing them to admit their crimes could constitute as justice.

***

Shido doesn’t give a shit about Goro’s soulmate problems and also Goro would rather sit on a cactus and spin than tell Masayoshi Shido that Goro’s fucking soul is tied to the very thieves that are currently being a pain in Shido’s ass, which is to say that Shido calls him on the subway and rattles off three more Mementos targets that he wants taken out before the end of the week and Goro has no choice but to simper and nod and tell Shido yes sir, anything he wants, sir, right away, sir. Halfway through the phone call, Goro realizes that he could just tell Kurusu that Goro’s a murderer, and Kurusu, the leader of the righteous and just Phantom Thieves himself, would have no choice but to love Goro anyway, murders and all, murderer and all; and it wouldn’t even be a lie, wouldn’t even be an obligation; Kurusu would love him genuinely and sincerely and he wouldn’t even be able to stop himself, even if he came to hate himself for it. Shido hangs up on him. A nice old lady next to him says, “Did you get some good news, dear?” and Goro realizes that he’s grinning ear to ear.

***

Well, if Goro’s going to kill Kurusu, then he might as well meet the boy before he does--especially if Kurusu’s offering. Since they both have the days off and nothing better to do than to figure out what to do with the person they’ve found their soul bound to, Kurusu suggests that they meet up at some place called Leblanc, which, if Goro isn’t wrong, is the same place that Sae’s been hounding because of that child neglect case. Goro reminds himself that Kurusu has no choice but to love him because of this stupid soulmate thing, and therefore it’s patently ridiculous that Kurusu will have much of an opinion on the state of Goro’s hair. Goro fixes it anyway. He also brushes his teeth in lockable restroom in a Wild Duck Burger place. Almost leaves, then goes back and applies deodorant.

This is the stupidest thing that’s ever happened to Goro. Kurusu’s the phantom thief Goro’s trying to catch. Odds are Shido will have Kurusu killed or put in jail within the next eight months. Goro walks into Leblanc, sees Kurusu lurking in the corner booth in his school uniform, and feels his own heart do a dozen cartwheels. Oh, wow, Goro really does love him and he doesn’t even know him. This isn’t stupid. This is disgusting.

Goro isn’t familiar enough with Kurusu as a person to know what his stare means, but the man behind the bar apparently does. “Take it somewhere else, lovebirds,” he says. “Actually--for god’s sake, Kurusu, take him somewhere nice for the occasion.”

“Here is nice,” says Kurusu.

“Somewhere fancy. Geez, have some class and show your soulmate a good time.”

“Upstairs is nice,” says Kurusu.

“No it’s--ugh,” says the barista, and mutters something about kids these days as Goro considers the possibility that Kurusu is going to try and show his love by skipping straight to the part where they fuck on the first date, and Goro will have the pleasure of cutting his own soulmate’s dick off. Greatly cheered by this opportunity, Goro says his hasty goodbyes to the barista and goes upstairs, curious to see the room of the boy that he’s going to have the honor of murdering.

Goro takes the couch. Kurusu sits at the desk chair. (Not backwards, thank god.) “How good to see you again,” Goro lies cheerily. “Have you been well, since we last spoke?”

And Kurusu--Goro doesn’t know why he thought the boy from the TV station, who argued with him on live TV, would disappoint him--Kurusu looks him square in the eye and says, “The soulmate thing doesn’t have to matter.”

“Oh?” says Goro, and leans forward. Why did he think Kurusu wouldn’t make an interesting move? It’s Kurusu. Of course he’d approach the soulmate issue with the same fascinating approach that he took to justice itself. “Most people would say it matters quite a lot. Most people would be delighted to have found true love. So young, too.”

“Are you?” asks Kurusu.

Goro blinks like he’s been thrown an unfair question in a TV interview. Kurusu smiles, slow, sure.

“Not to sound like a cynic,” says Kurusu evenly, “but it doesn’t feel much like love if it’s not a choice.”

Goro’s smile widens. “Is free will a prerequisite of true love, then?”

“If it’s going to mean anything that’s worth anything.”

“Even if such free will costs you your shot at happiness?” Goro presses.

Kurusu doesn’t blink. “Would you be happy, chained to someone you love but had no choice in loving?”

Obviously fucking not, but Goro doesn’t want to hear that from Kurusu, because it makes Kurusu sound like he understands Goro, and the last thing Goro wants to hear from the boy he’s going to kill is that he’s not just Goro’s soulmate, but his soulmate for a good reason. 

“The idea of soulmates is a practically immoral phenomenon,” says Goro, so as to avoid the question. “At some point, it’s hardly any different from brainwashing or psychological manipulation, or even Stockholm syndrome. But the fact of the matter is that it’s a widely documented phenomenon, too. There’s no doubt that it’s real, and it exists, and that you and I are bound together. Speak practically, Kurusu. What are you proposing we do?” Besides just murdering you in Mementos, Goro thinks and doesn’t say.

“Pretend it didn’t happen. It doesn’t have to matter if we don’t let it,” says Kurusu. “I’m only in Tokyo until the end of this school year, too. We just have to wait until then, and then I’ll be hundreds of miles away and it won’t matter anymore.”

“You’re proposing that we outwit fate itself.”

Kurusu pushes his glasses up. Behind his hand, his lips just barely turn upwards. “Don’t think you can do it?”

Goro’s eyes narrow and his smile sharpens. “On the contrary, I’m only worried you won’t be able to keep up with me.”

“It’s a deal, then,” says Kurusu.

“We’ll choose our own paths of our own free will,” Goro agrees, “and we won’t let such a silly soulmate phenomenon determine the course of our lives.”

Kurusu’s smiles softly and takes Goro’s offered hand and shakes it. And for just a moment, Goro’s heart doesn’t feel like a besotted, weak traitor, but entirely at peace.

[itwill-comeback]

Some things to note

Alright, so this is my work's blog, a side blog inside a bog, don't mind me. Nickname's Casper or Cas for now. I'm 20, a Capricorn, a decent writer, huge Hozier fan. This is where I'll be putting the stuff that I write as well as on AO3 which to be fair, I'm not as good at using since I just started using it.

About my writing:

I'm an absolute mess of a writer, zero update consistency, sorry. No editor, unless you count Grammarly. I'll probably only ever post my COVT works here and AO3 so there's that.

× I love the COVT just the way it is, but I crave some new things in it. In my writing you'll probably find the following

× Vlad not being bad at like everything, boy needs some skills and hobbies dang it!

× Vlad having motivations and in some way resembling his father when that motivation is what's driving his decisions, don't worry he won't become his old man, but lord outside of physically resembling Tomas he needs to have some of his traits.

× You don't know where we are canonically in my works? Join the club babes. Call it an AU or post-canon if it makes you feel better cause I'm just writing for the fuck of it, and you're in my candy cottage now kids.

× Vlad has ADHD canonically I'm almost certain, so don't be surprised if it's in my works. He's on adderall and Henry reminds him often to take his medication so he's not the Big Forgetful.

× Vlad is willing to flex on people about being the Pravus because he's aware it tricks vampires out and he finds that funny.

× Henry has an Attitude™ and does Not tolerate shit from vampires. Thank those Slayer Genetics.

× Vlad schemes. No context just,, be aware.

× Dorian is ostracized in Elysia, but he's not actually that creepy, people just really don't like that he's powerful and has a penchant for playing the Cheshire Cat. Cryptic soft boi with a grin that claims madness, promise he's just lonely.

× Vlad is far less awkward in my writing, he's clued in to social and psychological influences.

× D'Ablo has gotten a fucking redemption arc. Will I write it? Unlikely. (I did) But you see in my head canon he's faced off with Tomas and Vikas, and being the incredibly hard to kill bastard that he is, got out of it alive despite their best attempts to be rid of him. Pravus blood will take you so far. He lied low, got bored, came back to Stokerton and basically told Vlad "You're the Pravus, we been knew, want my job back, idc bout u or ur uncle or the Elder Council, like being President tho so tell Otis to scoot." And Vlad was like "yeah sure, Otis wants to go back to being principal anyway & the Elder Council doesn't take up near as much time as the Stokerton Council cause it hardly ever convenes, don't fuck wit me again, my dad's dead btw, oh and Vikas too. Let's just be chill." And that was that.

× Vlad has vampire friends and empathizes with other orphans. Not far fetched. Like at all.

× Vlad has a few jobs, gets that bread... for a college aged kid at least.

× Did I say bread? D'Ablo is rich af. Stunts on everybody in Armani suits and wears Red Bottoms. He's the President of a Council, you know that job pays. Old rich Italian vampire rolls in mad cash and has taste, surprise surprise ?

× Know who else is an old rich Italian vampire? Dorian Ciotti, his family uses stocks and real estate as monopoly money. And you thought they were just a humble family with a small business, jokes on you they haven't been humble for hundreds of years. Dorian is known to travel all the time, where did y'all think he got the money for that? You better believe he spoils Cecile, she's his baby girl. A rich single dad who thinks he might fuck up at any moment, he's doing great at raising her. Your fav could never.

× Elysian Councils are mostly afraid and indignant towards Vlad, but don't worry, he can see through them quite well at this point. (Read: he was raised by Tomas fucking Tod, the king of liars, other vampires don't have shit on him.)

× Elysia is not entirely the Councils, Elysia is a world of vampires full of pocket communities and niche tribes all tied by the same undead thread.

× Otis and Vlad share the issue of having a terrible sweet tooth, and now that Nelly's gone they have to figure out how to bake for themselves. Also blood candy and blood mixed baked goods exist and Vlad is really wanting to try some.

× Vlad has the most powerful weapon against vampires on him at all times now, is curious to find out how it works and what it runs on. Elysia knows he doesn't leave it anywhere, if he's somewhere the Lucius is there with him.

× I will be inventing a few of my own charms (like the tego charm) with latin words so you can always ask Google what the charm does before I tell you. (I.e. Tego = to cloak, to hide. This charm is used to allow the vampire who creates it to have a lock down on any humans they place it near.) Tomas places these around the citizens of Bathory to keep other vampires from reading their minds and discovering his location, he closes their minds in a way.

× Vlad has more complex hidy-holes for his things these days.

× Remember that key in the first book that looked like head of a woman that was described in detail and then left behind and never mentioned again? Remember it. I'm gonna use it. Red herring? Who?

× Henry has not forgotten the time he saved Otis' life. He's gonna call in that favor someday, Otis, you know he will.

× Otis has a lot more faith in Vlad to not act like a child and will treat him like an adult.

× Vlad has a huge crush on somebody. Not saying who.

× Vlad's a big hippie. On god, he loves the earth, hates conflict, and wants to tell D'Ablo about how many slave children worked to create his outfit, but wants to keep their peace more.

× Vlad has at long last, filled out and isn't the lanky child he once was, could throw you through a wall but is probably too nice for that. Probably.

× Vlad and the Pravus are separate entities sharing the same vessel. Pravus isn't a ghost though, he's the Adam of the vampire species and died a long ass time ago and wanted to live again after a while. Much like D'Ablo, he lied low, got bored and wanted his place in the world back. Had to create a new form of life to exist in, created the vessel (Vlad's body), could've gotten rid of Vlad's soul and just worn his body, but kind of ended up adoring him before he was even born and, entranced with the concept of this new existence, decided to share the body with him, which sort of forces him to stay hidden in Vlad's subconscious or divide their body into two bodies. Which he can totally do, but it's kind of a lot of trouble and would hurt Vlad badly so he doesn't bother. He really adores this dumb kid and doesn't want him to be lonely, but that'll present its own issues in its own time.

× Dorian is aware of all of this. Pravus can fix his mind and his cravings for vampire blood, but he can't force this from the two of them because it would kind of fuck Vlad up. Oh you mean that fox in the back of my mind isn't my mental support animal, it's an ancient vampire and kind of absurdly powerful? Cool cool.

× Eddie Poe becomes a bigger problem than ever before! Fun!!

× The Slayer Society becomes a bigger problem than ever before!

× As far as I'm concerned, Em is not being manipulated by D'Ablo in the books, he answers to her, she's autographed bible old, you think he could pull one over on her? Tomas Tod couldn't even manage that. (Canonically I know Vlad insinuates that D'Ablo is holding some power over Em but I just can't see that realistically being true.)

× Em went home to Europe after that Slayer cleanse nonsense, she's still President of her Council, but she is no longer on the Council of Elders. Kind of in hiding because she suspects Vlad's about to take over the entire world.

× D'Ablo's cult is still a thing, they send Vlad gifts sometimes. Sometimes it's a dead bird, sometimes it's an envelope full of cash. D'Ablo doesn't care either way what they give him, Vlad prays it's not a dead animal every time tho soo.

× Remember how Mellina was never said to have any family? Turns out her family were just religious nutcases and promptly disowned her (and her child) upon finding out she was having a child out of wedlock.

× Vlad is in touch with the Tod clan in Scotland cause he wanted to get in touch with some part of his family and prove to himself that his dad's side isn't all bad, they kind of give him Evil Dad War Flashbacks™, but they're good people. A few are vampires and they think Vlad's a cool kid.

× There's always gonna be magic in my writing, don't worry though, I'm not gonna make Vlad OP.

[chicleeblair]

Just got back from seeing The Crimes of Grindlewald. I am totally opinion-dumping, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to know other thoughts. I want to know what other people thing! I could be wrong about things!

A FEW NON-SPOILERY THOUGHTS (UNLESS YOU THINK ALL THOUGHTS ARE SPOILERS):

I liked Newt’s creatures. I loved the Niffler. He needs a name, though.

WHY IS EVERYONE WEARING SUITS? DID WIZARDS FORGET HOW TO WEAR SUITS BETWEEN THE 1930s AND 1991?

Eddie Redmayne is precious. He is flawed. He has made poor role choices. I love him. 

say gay JK

SPOILERS AHEAD

.

I wanted this movie to surprise me. I really did. I wanted Nagini to prefer the snake body, for owning that to be part of her from the start, to know it wasn’t a curse. Anything that didn’t make her a prop for a boy’s story, and set her up to eventually be companionless but for a megalomaniac whose life is so tied to hers that she must be beheaded by a child for the evil to die. It will feel wrong to me, no matter where we go from here, because hse was exoticised and nothing but a means for Credence to escape someone who didn’t seem to be trying all that hard to hold him. 

Queenie’s storyline also royally pissed me off. There wasn’t any nuance, simply an, oh hey I met this man yesterday, he didn’t call me crazy, and he told me he beleives in inter-magical relationships, so he must be legit! I thught maybe she’d be enchanted, like Jacob at the beginning—which, fine, she’s willing to enchant him but it felt OOC—or that she’d realize that Grindlewald said what she wanted to hear, or—something. Anything but the Jewish-coded character with magical mental illness becoming a pawn of wizard-Hitler. And the analogue between Hitler and Grindlewald is too strong for anyone to try to sell me on her being the “oppressed ifghting back” or whatever. She’s not coded as the German citizien who didn’t know what was going on, she’s coded as one of those hurt, and I didn’t’t buy her storyline. Rowling needed someone to cross the line, and Tina wouldn’t, Jacob couldn’t, so Queenie was left. It’s unnecessary. 

And that doesn’t get into the fact that Jacob calling her “crazy” at the beginning was actually dealt with really well, but then at the end we’re set up to think he’s right for saying that, because she IS being irrational, and that’s simply not helpful. I don’t know, all I can say is if she isn’t a double-agent lickity-split I will be….Angrier than I am. 

A lot of it felt unnecessary.

I don’t like the Credence reveal. I don’t think the whole Harry Potter franchise needs to be the Dumbledore McDumbledore, but hey we can’t say gay “like brothers" my ass Chronicles. Like I see what you were doing there, you want us to think about DD having a brother, and his sister died, but a brother because apparently ABERFORTH DOESN’T EVEN MATTER, and does he ever even KNOW about Credence? Because either:

A. He sent Credence away?! 

B. Credence was his father’s illegitimate baby, and DD didn’t know. (Related to the Azkaban stint? Are Obscurus genetic now????)

C. Kendra somehow had another kid? Is she the one on the boat? She has Native American blood, right? Why be taking him to America, with her other children still in England? And isn’t she dead before this? And Papa DD before that?

Someone get me a timeline. 

And it all begs the question: If Credence really is a long-lost sibling (which, I’m sorry, Mark Evans made far more fucking sense than this shit) WHY DOES GRINDLEWALD KNOW, BUT APPARENTLY NO ONE ELSE? I know Rita Skeeter isn’t the best reporter evah, but she did seem to dig up all the possible dirt!

Young Dumbledore was great. For all that this doesn’t need to be The Dumbledore McDumbledore Chronicles, the way he was written and played absolutely felt to me like a Dumbledore who hasn’t battled his bestie brother lover yet, and but will become that man. He is a Chess Master learning to become a Chess God. 

He is ALSO GAY

There are ways the story of Newt’s involvement in the inter-continental politics of the Grindlewald era could be told without constantly harping on storylines out of The Life and Times. The Lestrange stuff was so powerful, why not delve deeper into that?

Why not delve more into the world of Magical Paris, like we (sort of) did with New York in the first film? Fine, Grindlewald hates Paris and the end is at Père Lachaise. It could’ve been ANYWHERE. We were mostly indoors. Where was the architecture, the horticulture, the FASHION. 

I loved the flashback scene (Autistic Newt is Autistic). I loved Leta, and while I didn’t like the mixed-race woman dying—and oh wow the non-evil girl from the stereotypically-evil family is mixed-race. JK you are NOT subtle—I did respect her sacrifice and liked that she wasn’t evil simply because of her name. I also REALLY enjoyed that we got some nuance to Newt’s relationship to Theseus. It wasn’t a good/evil dichotomy, no one stole anyone else’s girl. I want more about Leta and her brothers, and their different upbringings, and the cultural differences, and….

Wow, POC in the background, this should not be notable!

How did Rabastian and Rudolphus Lestrange happen????? All the male heirs are dead, unless somehow the baby didn’t die, or Credence is actually the baby, or I don’t know, Thesus fucking takes Leta’s name and his kids are Death Eaters?? Am I missing a Lestrange line here? 

MORE MAGICAL CULTURES.

I DO NOT FEEL LIKE I GOT MAGICAL PARIS. AT FUCKING ALL.  

If the miscommunication between Tina and Newt had gone on HALF A DAMN SECOND longer I would’ve cut someone. 

Did muggle Paris just NOT NOTICE that shit? We didn’t have magical bird rain this time…. 

How TF do you get a half-elf in this world.

How did the circus get a house-elf?

Why wasn’t the servant a damn goblin?

Why did we barely learn anyone’s name? JK is usually obsessed with names. Like the whole damn thing is about names....

Grindlewald did not have to be Johnny Depp. He wasn’t a classic Depp character, which makes the decision to keep him on even more bizarre. 

YOU CAN SAY GAY, IT’LL BE OKAY. 

Why spend all that time with the damn baby only to have a follower kill him and that be it? Why not set Grindlewald up as the less brutal megalomaniac who DOESN’T kill babies, and help us see while people fell for his ruse initially?

I liked young Minerva, though I always head canon her as being Tom Riddle’s age, I know she’s not. 

Why was Nicholas Flammel the Walking Corpse a thing??? Like, what did he bring that ANYONE else couldn’t do?  

I liked Jacob in this one. Jacob is good and can stay. 

Honestly, I want AU fic now please. So much AU fic. I, in fact, plan to write one, like, tomorrow. 

SAY GAY JK 

SAY GAY JK

#SAYGAYJK

[peridot-gladioli]

For the drabble meme: 4, 27, 90? :)

Gonna be posting these separately because I can’t Drabble and this first one *alone* is 1000 words (give or take).

For context this ties in to what this will be. If my plan holds true this scene will be part of Chapter Four; I hope it still makes any kind of sense out of order. :(

4. “I’m too sober forthis”

Foggy was quiet as he read through Elektra’s will—his braille-readingtorturously slow to Matt—then let out a long, slow, noisy breath.

Matt realised he had been holding his own breath and let itout more subtly.

“So let me see if I’ve got this right, Matt. Elektra had achild—has a child—and made you its guardian?”

“Yes.”

“When you didn’t know he existed before now?”

“No.”

“Jesus.”

“There… there’s other paperwork,” Matt gestured to the metalfile-case, “but, uh, I can’t read it. It’s not, umm…”

“Do you want me to do it?”

“Uh. Yeah. Yeah, if you could… that’d be, that would begood, thanks.” He realised he hadn’t told Foggy the most important part of allthis, what Elektra had told him in her audio-message, what Stick had come tosay, but he wanted to know if there was any evidence. If Foggy could put ittogether for himself from the papers. That and also he had no idea how to actuallycome out and say, Elektra told me he’smine… So did Stick.

He heard Foggy unlock and open the case, take something out,and then there was barely a moment’s pause before he took a sharp breath.

“What?”

“Birth certificate. First thing in there. Matt. Father’s name is blank but EvanderMATTHEWS,” he paused, significantly.

Matt was briefly annoyed at the emphasis. That part had beenin the will.

“Evander Matthews was born November eighth 2005. If memoryserves—and trust me, I remember your break-up with Elektra—Elektra dumped you inAPRIL 2005. Please, tell me there was someone else.”

“What?! No! She didn’t… That wasn’t… We didn’t break upbecause of that.” He felt indignanton Elektra’s behalf. The ending had been awful, true, but she had loved… Shewouldn’t have done that.

“Matthew! I literally gave you the safe-sex talk because Iwas worried you’d learned bullshit in Catholic school and would try to usewithdrawal or something equally stupid! I physically gave you condoms!”

Oh, yes, Matt remembered. And even now he felt his cheeksheat, though he had also been so touched at how concerned and considerate hisfriend had been, because Foggy had been right, Matt’s sex-ed had been stuff heover-heard and rumours from the others boys. (He had actually been told that ifshe peed after a sex a girl wouldn’t get pregnant.) And Foggy had BOUGHT HIMCONDOMS not left him to struggle, blind, in the drug store and maybe have toask an assistant to help him out. He found himself stuttering a bit before hedefended, “She told me I didn’t have to worry about birth control! And she wastelling the truth! How was I supposed to know that she meant it because she wasdeliberately trying to get pregnant because Stick wanted a child with my DNA?!”

“Whoa. Okay.” Foggy held up a hand in a “stop” gesture and ranhis other hand over his face and into his hair. “I am too sober for this. There’sa hell of a lot to unpack there. Firstly… Stick?! Your knock-off Jedi Master?Old blind guy who taught you the ways of martial arts? What the fuck has he gotto do with anything?”

Oh. Oh God. “He… He trained Elektra too. He sent her. Toseduce me. Test me. Recruit me to his war. Umm… He’s, uh, part of a ninja clan.The Chaste. Apparently they’ve been fighting the Hand—that’s the ninjas thatkilled Elektra and abducted Karen and everything—for hundreds of years orsomething.”

“And he wanted you to fight in a war? And your DNA?”

“He thought a child would have my abilities without the, uh,problematic,” Matt spat the word, “morality.”

“Time out,” Foggy made the T-sign with his hands, “I thoughtyou got your abilities, the enhanced senses and stuff, from the chemicals thatblinded you? Not genetics.”

“Yeah, but he reckoned acquired abilities, enhancements likethat, changed me at a cellular level. And, well,” he shrugged. “Sperm arecells.”

“Definitely way too fucking sober for this. That’s some majorsci-fi shit right there, Matthew.”

“And chemicals which somehow enable me to hear you comingfrom two blocks away aren’t sci-fi,Foggy? The Super-Soldier Serum was chemicals. Chemicals plus radiation areapparently all it takes to turn a five-foot six scientist into an eight-foottall, green, raging behemoth. Maybe we need to rethink what’s science fictionand what’s science reality.”

“Wait a minute! Does that mean Captain America—or the Hulk—couldpass it on to their… No. Nope. Not going there.” Foggy took a deep breath. Letit out again. “Okay. So this Stick guy wanted your baby and used Elektra to getit. And she went along with that. And you’ve only just found out about this?”

“Pretty much.”

“Oh, Matty.”

Foggy’s tone made Matt want to cry. Again. But he hadalready sobbed all over the other man once today. But maybe something in hisface gave him away, because once again he was gathered into a warm, comfortingembrace. He clung on.

“Are congratulations in order? Daddy?”

He let out a (wet) chuckle at Foggy’s teasing tone and Foggysqueezed his shoulder. Shook him a little bit.

“Dude. Come on. The rest of those papers can wait.”

“What?! Why? Where are you..?”

“Matt. Matty-Matt. My buddy, my pal, my best friend. WE aregonna go get hammered—as is only appropriate. We’re both Irish so we have towet the baby’s head. It’s tradition and heritage and culture and stuff. Besides,I wasn’t joking about not being able to handle this sober. And if I feel likethat, God knows how you’re doing. Come on.”

Best friend. Mattwrapped his arms around Foggy and just held him. Thank God for Foggy Nelson. Two hours ago he had not even been surethey were still friends. Now this. Maybethere was still hope of making some kind of sense of everything.

[fcrrokinetic]

bastardsunlight​:

Leon in no way thought his daughter rescuing was at all unique. Ashley Graham had been the then-president’s child, of course, and no infant, but he made a mental note to harangue Chris for trying to muscle in on his territory. He had seen the child, after all, the small, pink, squalling creature Chris had brought back from this awful place. Her name was Rose and she was not his, that much Leon knew for a fact. How a baby had made it out was suddenly becoming more clear than simply “Chris Redfield can’t fucking die”, which would, any other time, be a fantastic explanation.

But this extra detail about the Cadou? That was useful shit. If they couldn’t find a living specimen, aside from what was likely in this guy, they had the next best thing. The only other factor that would absolutely keep him alive and un-dissected was if he had knowledge of or direct access to the actual “how” of it. Leon found that unlikely, given the man’s contempt for the place and his speech patterns. He was a test subject, same as the others—or that was how it sounded.

“Cults, I understand,” he admitted. “Parasite-worshipping, Kool-aid-drinking zealots are just about my favorite people.”

He remembered the pale faces of the plaga-infested cultists, bellowing at him in Spanish, threatening him and demanding surrender. He’d lost track of himself once and that was all it had taken. Subconsciously, his hand came up to rub the side of his neck where the egg had been implanted so many years ago. Not even a scar remained, but the memory of it certainly did. He sucked his teeth momentarily and nodded.

“So this Miranda woman was crossing mushrooms with slugs and then using those to enhance humans—are they controllable? What was her level of influence?”

He watched the man’s body language. He didn’t want to tell Leon the things he was telling him, but it seemed like he DID want to tell someone. A zealot would have clammed up, bitten a cyanide capsule, licked a salt block if the slug thing was at all applicable—anything to keep from talking. This guy’s contempt was real, and it was personal. I can use that, Leon told himself, to get information and—just maybe—protect this guy.

He knew a thing or two about being infested against his will, after all.

The laugh that escaped him was bitter.  Miranda’s level of influence?  Might as well be asking what kind of influence the fucking sun had on a forest.

Not that the level of influence she had mattered much, anyway.  The bitch was dead.  And who the hell knew?  Maybe he would be too, here in a little while.  He took some comfort in at least knowing that even if he hadn’t been the one to kill Miranda, he had at least outlived her.  Small victories were victories nonetheless.

“Whether or not things were controllable depended on how well they took to the Cadou.  Most people turned to lycans.  Feral.  Worthless.  They were the lucky ones.”  He pauses, shifting slightly where he sat on the floor, trying to get more comfortable.  “The four Lords had some ancestral ties to the area.  We all took to the Cadou with varying levels of affinity.  Changed us all differently.  Let us all do different things.”

He had been the strongest of the four; the one who had taken best to the Cadou, by the time all was said and done, but he left that part unspoken.  Kennedy would figure it out on his own, or he wouldn’t.  Not that it mattered.

“As for Miranda’s influence...  She could control the Megamycete itself.  Still not one-hundred percent sure how that wound up happening.  The four of us were the only ones with any semblance of free will, from what I could tell, but the other three were so fucking stupid they just worshipped the ground Miranda walked on.  It was honestly pretty disgusting.  Spent all their time trying to please her, coming up with new and different ways to force a Cadou into a person, see what happened when you fucked around with the genetics....”

He trailed off, staring at the other man.  “They experimented on living, breathing humans.  Not a shred of remorse for it, either.  I used corpses.”

[kateyes224]

The Voicemail, Part 2

Written for @xfficchallenges dialogue-only challenge.  

Timeline: Post-IWTB, Pre-Revival Rating:  Strong R for language and adult themes Author: @kateyes224 A/N:  I’m sorry.  This is Scully’s response to the things Mulder said to her in The Voicemail by my bestie and baeta, @piecesofscully, so read that first otherwise you’ll have no context for this. TW:  Suicidal ideation

“…not going to say this over a voicemail.  Goddammit.  Mulder, you are such an asshole.  

“You know what?  Fuck it.  Guess what I did tonight, Mulder?  I finally said yes when that 35-year-old neurosurgeon who’s been sniffing around for the last few months asked me to dinner again.  And we had dinner.  And it was marginal.  Not great, not terrible, but fine.  FINE.  I know how much you hate that word.  And then he left.  He left me sitting here on this curb.  And now here I am, drunk off a bottle of wine that probably costs more than one of my first paychecks, and Walter fucking Skinner of all people is coming to pick me up and take me home.

“How dare you leave me that scathing, awful…that message was quite possibly the worst indictment of who I am as a person that I’ve ever heard, Mulder…and keep in mind, Bill Junior still calls me regurlarly to remind me what a royal fuck-up I am and I don’t think he would dare to say the things that you said to me the other night on your stupid fucking voicemail.

And I don’t give a SHIT, Mulder, about the other twenty messages you’ve left in the meantime apologizing to me for those disgusting, hateful, terrible things you said.  Because you know what, Mulder?  In vino veritas, and in case you don’t remember Latin, you prick, that means ‘in wine, truth.’

“The truth.  You know everything there is to know about the truth, don’t you?  You’ve been chasing after yours for so long you probably forgot what everyone else’s version of it looks like, and that unlike time, which is a universal invariant, truth is relative.  So here’s one for you that I bet you never saw coming.

“I wanted to abort my son.  You know why?  Because you were gone.  So I made the appointment.  I laid myself down on that table and begged God for the strength to get me through the procedure so that I could just drive home, write a nice long letter apologizing to my mother, and eat a bullet.  But I couldn’t very well kill myself if I had another life flourishing in my suddenly-fertile womb, now could I?  

“So as I’m laying there, by myself, waiting for the doctor to come in, I heard your voice.  You, Mulder, telling me not to give up on a miracle.  And yet there I was, aborting our miracle.  And I hated myself for it.  I almost hated myself more than I hated you for walking away from me.  How do you do that, Mulder?  How do you find a way to be everything and nothing to me at the same time?  

“You ready for another hard truth, Mulder?   You told me the other day that hate and love go hand-in-hand.  And you’re right.  I hate that I love you.  I hate myself for loving you.  You’re like a disease.  You’ve eaten away at my heart like the cancer ate away at my brain, and I’ve been just as helpless to stop you as I was trying to stop it.  And even though I swore to you that I never blamed you for anything that had ever happened to me, promised until I was blue in the face, here’s another secret I never told you:  I do blame you.  I blame you every day.

“I wish you’d stayed dead.  At least if you’d stayed dead, I’d’ve gotten to raise my son.  My son, Mulder.  My miracle.  Genetically he might be yours, but you were never his father.  Your inability to commit to something that actually mattered, something as miraculous as my child, is utterly astounding for someone as obsessed with the unexplained as you profess to be.  I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.  You even gave up on Samantha.  If I’d known that all it was going to take for you to stop looking for her was a fake psychic with some bullshit story about walk-ins beaming into space like some Star Trek rip-off, I’d have tracked one down a long time ago and saved us both the heartache.

“We had a family, the three of us.  I gave you the opportunity to finally stop and get out of the car, and what did you do?  You left.  And you know what?  I’m glad I named him William, after your father, and after mine.  At least our fathers, with all their flaws, were present.  Even your father, Mulder, your abusive drunk of a father.  At least he had the nerve to stick around long enough to raise you, even if he kept you at arm’s length.  But you?  You couldn’t even manage that much, could you?  The only time you’re willing to step up and find some righteous paternal indignation for a child is when she’s dead.  So you keep taking those flowers to Emily’s empty grave, Mulder.  Whatever makes you feel better about the fact that you abandoned us.

“And how can you blame me?  Huh?!  How can you blame me for doing what I thought was best?  YOU WEREN’T THERE, MULDER.  I did what I thought would keep my son safe.  And I thank God that I did.  I’m glad he’s being raised by a real man.”

“Dana-”

“If you weren’t such a self-absorbed, selfish asshole, Mulder, you’d realize that I left you because I love you too much to watch you drown.  I’ve mourned you for what I thought was the last time, more times than I care to count.  I don’t think I have it in me do it again.  So do yourself and the rest of the world a favor.  Make it worth my while this time.  If you’re gonna kill yourself, at least MEAN IT THIS TI-”

“Dana, give me the phone.”

“NO, Walter, FUCK YOU-”

“GIVE ME THE PHONE, SCULLY, DAMMIT, that’s an order!  I’m driving you home!”

“You can’t order me-”

BEEEEEEP.

“For envelope information, press 4.  To delete, press 7.  To listen again, press 9.”

[my-mystic-messenger]

Hello can I make a fic request (preferably angst) about juminxmc when they are dating but later on they knew that they are actually siblings? (same father different mother). You can make it SFW/NSFW. I read your rules and you didn't mind incest. Thank you~ I love your writing

This is hands down myfavourite fucking prompt so far. Like legit right up my alley. Maybeif I hadn’t stumbled upon Anime’s like ‘I’m in love with my youngersister’ at an impressionable age I wouldn’t be so pumped – read:fucked in the head – about this prompt. But, lucky for you Itotally did watch and adore that and many similar Animes, so this isgoing to be good!

I had so many ideas Icould have easily written like a 50k fic, but since I don’t want toinvolve AO3 and Tumblr definitely isn’t the place to publish longstuff, I had to once more limit myself to a more washed out versionof the mess I had planned. Sorry? Or maybe you’re welcome? Who willever know!

I also want to say that inno shape or form do I approve of incest in real life. This is fictionand is not meant to be taken to real life. However, as per usual, Idid my research. There is a condition called Genetic SexualAttraction, which is what I will use as a base for this fic. You’lllearn more about it along with Jumin and his half-sister/wife. 

Hope you enjoy! :3

Masterlist

Who is Madeleine?

|| REQUEST ARE (ALWAYS)OPEN!! ||

Fandom: MysticMessenger

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Incestand a lot of dark shit connected to it I don’t want to spoil yet but read with caution 

Categories: F/M

Relationships: MC xJumin

Word count: 5450

It was the last night oftheir honeymoon, Jumin and his wife lying in bed together. Both ofthem were naked, a tangled mess of limbs under the silk cover huggingtheir bodies. His arm was wrapped around her protectively, fingerstracing over the faint dots scattered over Madeleines back. It wasone of the many, small things that Jumin loved about her, that madeher unique. He’d never thought he’d ever feel that kind of love forany person and yet here he was, holding his wife in his arms aftermaking love yet again, mesmerized by something as simple as freckles.

Madeleine who’d fallenasleep a couple of minutes ago stirred, lids moving before flutteringopen slowly. She hummed in appreciation, tilting up her head to pressa kiss to Jumin’s chin. Jumin chuckled, knowing that she would haveaimed for the mouth, but went for the chin out of convenience, beingtoo sated and lazy to move. “I can feel you thinking, darling”,she mumbled. She began drawing patterns on his chest, mindlesslytrailing her fingers over his warm skin. Jumin hummed. “You say itlike it’s a bad thing.”

Madeleine shook her head, shruggingslightly. “Not necessarily. I love how smart you are, but this isour honeymoon and we just had sex for God knows what time and you’restill thinking. If it is something that important…it makes menervous.” Jumin sat up a little, pulling Madeleine along and intohis arms. She now sat between his legs, arms wrapped around her frombehind as Jumin’s chin rested on her shoulder. “It’s nothing bad,darling”, he assured her. “I was just looking forward to youfinally meeting my father upon returning.”

She sighed, saggingagainst her husband. “I knew you would say this”, she spokeagainst his skin, hiding her face in the crock of his neck. Juminfrowned, hand brushing through the bright red strands of her hair.“You sound rather unhappy about it. Is there something wrong withmy father?” Madeleine quickly sat up, shaking her head. “No, mylove, you misunderstand. It’s not your father, it’s me. I’m worriedhe might not like me. Especially considering that you swiped me offand married me without asking her permission or so much as anintroduction.”

To his surprise, Jumin found himselflaughing. It was a feature he was rekindling with after so many yearsof not having done it whole heartedly. To think that the one personwho awoke him, who filled his life with joy he hadn’t experiencessince childhood, would doubt herself so much was strangely amusing tothe businessman. “Madeleine, he will love you”, Jumin assuredher, punctuating every word with a kiss to her porcelain skin. “Hewill love you. Trust me on this. In fact, I have never been morecertain about anything in my life.

♛

For their first meetingJumin and Madeleine had decided to invite Mr. Han to the apartment.It was where she felt most at peace, so did Jumin, on top of being amore private setting for a private meeting. Madeleine had suggestedto cook something for the whole thing, but Jumin had quickly shutdown the idea. Not because she was a bad cook, but because she wasstressed out enough as it was and cooking certainly wouldn’t help herrelax. Instead he’d called the chef’s to take care of it, telling hiswife to take a long, hot bath and relax. 

By the time shestepped out of the bathroom Madeleine looked positively divine. Thedress she had chosen was chic while not being too attentiondemanding. It was was casual, the dark purple of it perfectlycomplimenting her green eyes. Her ginger curls well around hershoulders freely and her face was almost completely blank of make-up.Frankly, it was the most beautiful that way. Jumin told her as much,making her giggle and blush, earning him a quick peck to the cheek.“Oh you flatter me too much, darling.”A couple of minuteslater the security guard knocked and stepped in to alert the couplethat Mr. Chairman had arrived and asked for permission to enter.Jumin obviously granted it, happy that the guards did their job asthoroughly as they did. To say no to the CEO of C&R Internationalproved their loyalty to Jumin. The door was finally opened andJumin’s father stepped inside, smiling and thanking the guard forholding the door open. Jumin wrapped an arm around Madeleine and leadher into view only for his father to freeze, eyes wide as he gasped,“Elizabeth?”

The young woman blinked inconfusion before frowning slightly. “How do you know my mother?”It was obvious to Madeleine that Mr. Han was talking about hermother, as she looked almost exactly like her. The woman’s genes weresurprisingly dominant considering that green eyes and red hair wereusually recessive and rarely passed on. However, other than the everso slightly different shape of eyes, Madeleine had always been aperfect copy of her mother. Being confused with her was nothing newto the lawyer. Being confused for her mother by Mr. Han, however,made no sense.

The CEO paled at herquestion, chest rising and falling rapidly like he was pantinghimself into some sort of panic attack. His hand came to rest overhis mouth in obvious shock before he went on to nervously brushthrough his hair. “Oh God”, he whispered. “Oh God, this isn’tokay.” Jumin and Madeleine exchanged looks, confused at the mansweird behaviour. “Mr. Han, Sir, is everything alright? I didn’tmean to upset you. Is there any way we can help you”, Madeleineattempted to soothe her father in law.

Mr. Han looked at her,eyes filled with guilt and something akin to disgust. “Maddy”, hesaid, voice so soft and kind it made the woman’s heart ache in waysshe couldn’t fully understand. Why did she feel this way? Why didthat voice sound so familiar. “Your father and I, we went toCollege together”, he continued, choosing English over Korean. “Wewere best friends by the time he met your mother and proposed to her.I really loved your father, but when he first started hisbusiness…he abandoned your mother and me to focus onwork.”

Madeleine listened, her body recoiling before hermind seemed to catch on where this was going. “Your mother and I,we became closer. She was his wife and yet he didn’t take care of herthe way a husband should. She felt lonely and unsatisfied. So did I.One thing led to another and the two of us, well we shared apassionate night together”, he explained, pausing when Madeleinegasped. She couldn’t believe her mother had cheated on her fatherwith Mr. Han. Little did she know, that cheating wasn’t the biggestissue here.

“The both of us felt guilty, so we told yourfather about it. He was furious, rightly so, and decided to cut allties with me for many, many years. Your mother wasn’t allowed toconverse with me either and for the better part she didn’t. In allthose years I only ever got a single letter from her. In that lettershe explained that our night had led to her birthing a child ninemonths later, a child that I had no right to see but deserved to knowwas mine. A child that her husband would raise as his own, despite itbeing living, breathing proof of infidelity. A little daughter namedMaddy.”

♛

Madeleine had lockedherself into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet with her face buriedin her hands, tears running down her cheeks silently. After Mr. Han’sconfession she’d completely broken down, running off before anyonecould see her that way. Her husband’s – and possibly her own –father had left multiple hours ago and yet she hadn’t moved from herseat on the toilet. Jumin had knocked multiple times, attempting toget her out so they could talk, but she hadn’t been in the rightstate of mind to reply to him any of those times.

Multiple times she’dconsidered calling her mother, asking whether what Mr. Han had saidwas true or not, but had never gone through with her plan. Somethingdeep down inside of her knew that the man wasn’t lying and what heavyconsequences the truth bore. It was simply too much for the poorwoman to take in, dark thoughts clouding her mind. Her loving fathersuddenly a complete stranger. The mother she’d looked up to a weakcheat, a complete stranger suddenly her father but most disturbing ofall, her beloved husband suddenly her brother.

It was in the middle ofthe night that Madeleine finally resurfaced from the bathroom,walking into the bedroom where Jumin still lay awake. He’d waited forher, his own mind running a mile a minute. However, upon turningaround in bed to pull his wife into his arms he was met with her backand a cold shoulder. When attempting to rest a hand on her shoulder,seeking warmth or at least a conversation, she pleaded for him not totouch her. Feeling as if he’d been burned Jumin instantly pulledaway, listening to his wife silently cry herself to sleep for hours.

♛

A week later Jumin woke inthe middle of the night due to sounds that weren’t supposed to bethere. The past week had been hard, deprived of love and the warmthcoming with it. Madeleine had been silent, barely speaking to herhusband no matter how many times Jumin attempted to approach herabout the topic. She didn’t go to work either, didn’t pick up anycalls or even went to the RFA members for some sort of socialinteraction. Yet, the pain he’d felt throughout the week was nothingcompared to the pain of watching Madeleine silently packing herthings.

He instantly shot up from bed, running towards her tostop her form putting any more clothes away. She began to scream,tears already having strained her skin, red blotches tinting it. Shetried to push him away, beat at him. “Let me go! Let me go, Jumin.Let me go”, she half screamed half pleaded, voice breaking. Jumincouldn’t bring himself to, instead slinging his arms around herslender frame, holding her as close to his body as human possible. “Ican't”, he cried, first tears running down his cheek. “I can’tlose you. Please…”

Madeleine sagged in hisarms, body shaking against her husbands. In all the time they’d beentogether she’d never once heard him plead, let alone seen him cry.She turned her head to look at Jumin who’d hugged her from behind.Instead, she found herself being turned around and pulled into analmost violent kiss. At first Madeleine attempted to resist –mostly out of guilt rather than disgust or anything else – but soongave in to her husbands advances. She wrapped her arms around hisneck, melting into the kiss as he claimed her mouth.

Eventhrough the layers of clothes between them she could feel his erectcock pressing up against her, peaking her interest. While kissing herJumin slowly guided her backwards until Madeleine fell onto the bed.Eyes half lidded she watched as her husband unbuckled his belt totoss it to the side, unbuttoning his shirt and letting it glide ofhis strong shoulders before pulling down his pants and freeing hiserection. Madeleine licked her lips, hands coming to rest on hisabdomen, feeling the muscle under her fingers.The smile thatcurled around Jumin’s lips was almost predatory as he guided her headto his cock where Madeleine happily wrapped her lips around the manscock, not minding one bit that he was her brother. She sucked at histip at first, the man hissing at the sudden pleasure shooting throughhis body. She than began to take Jumin deeper and deeper, burying hiscock in her mouth inch by inch with every bob of her head untilfinally his cock hit the back of her throat. For a moment she chokedaround her husbands cock, but didn’t pull back.

“Such a good girl”,Jumin praised her, a hot shower running down her back. He brushedthrough her hair gently, causing Madeleine to moan before he startedto rock his hips, fucking into her mouth as the woman happily tookit. The sounds of pleasure she caused to fall from her husbands lipsturned her own, hips involuntarily rolling against the bed indesperate search for friction. She could feel the wetness spreadbetween her legs, arousal overwhelming her as pleasured Jumin. Henoticed of course, delightfully watching his wife grind against thebed.

“Do you want me to take you”, he asked, their eyesmeeting with her lips still wrapped around his shaft. “Want me totake care of your need?” Madeleine hummed around the others cock,vibrations sending spark of arousal up his length. Jumin abruptlypulled out, pushing Madeleine into a lying position before climbingbetween her legs. He pushed up her night gown, pleased as per usualthat she wore nothing underneath. He spread her legs, took his cockin hand and brushed the tip against her opening, delighted at thewetness that greeted him there.

When he pushed in it wasin one long, thrust, causing both of them to moan out. Jumin thenbent over his wife, pinning her wrists above her head to bask in thebeauty that was her long, slender body completely bared to him.“You’re breathtaking”, he whispered against her lips beforepulling out and thrusting in, setting a quick but steady pace. Theroom was silent other than the sounds of colliding skin and muffledgasps and moans as well as the wet sounds of Jumin’s cock plunginginto his wives wet cunt.

It didn’t take long foreither to reach their peak. Madeleine was the first to come, mouthwrapped around her erect nipple as his free hand played with herclit. She tightened further around his cock, jumping within her asJumin came close to orgasm himself. He reached his peak a mere minutelater, coming inside his wife. When he pulled out gently his hot comedripped out of her. He watched as much with a new kind of pleasurebefore his body was overwhelmed with fatigue and he fell onto themattress, pulling Madeleine into his arms before both drifted tosleep.

♛

“Madeleine, you haven’teaten all day”, Jumin spoke gently, kissing his wives temple as helooked over her shoulder at what she was typing up on her laptop. Amonth had passed since their night together. They’d decided to remaina couple, however risky that might be. Jumin’s father was against it,but the younger Han had argued that he would not lose the love of hislife for his father’s foolish mistake over two and a half decadesago. He refused to listen to any reason, willing to risk both hiscareer as well as freedom to be with Madeleine.

The woman turned around,looking up at her husband. “Genetic Sexual Attraction”, she said,leaving Jumin frowning at her in confusion. “Genetic SexualAttraction”, Madeleine repeated. “That is why we are sexuallyattracted to one another despite – well you know.” She turnedback to her laptop and opened up various sides. It was obvious, thatMadeleine had done a lot of research on the matter, almostobsessively so. Jumin hadn’t cared much, but he could tell that guiltwas eating at his wife, so he hadn’t stopped her from seekinganswers.

“It says that geneticsexual attraction is a condition in which people related to butseparated from one another early on often feel sexually attracted toone another upon reuniting; known or unbeknownst that they arerelated”, she explained. “Because we are related we smell andfeel very similar, which created a feeling of familiarity and safetyright away. On top of that people hypothesised that when familieslive closely together, they become desensitised to each other assexual prospects. That desensitisation effect is said to happenbetween birth and age six.”

Jumin listened carefully,taking in the information given. He himself didn’t mind either way.Whatever the reason for their attraction for one another, a love aspure and unconditional as theirs could be no wrong or sin. However,he did understand his wives need for answers and some way to justifywhat she still considered immoral and sick. It hurt to know thatMadeleine thought that way about their love, but Jumin was set onconvincing her otherwise, no matter what it took. “I see”, hesaid. “Well, this proves that us being together is nothing unusualnor unnatural, is it now?”

Madeleine huffed. “Jumin”,she scolded. “That is not what I was trying to say. Just because wearen’t alone with our case doesn’t make it any less wrong.” Juminclosed his eyes, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I won’t allowyou to leave me, Madeleine. Not over this. I’ve lost my mother, mystep-mother, Rika and my best friend. Everyone who ever even remotelymatter. I won’t lose you. I won't”, he insisted. “How is our loveany less real than anybody else’s anyway?”

Strangely enough,Madeleine didn’t have a good response. Their love wasn’t any lessreal, despite the forbidden aspect of it. If anything their love feltlike the realest thing in her life, which made it all the morecomplicated and draining. If they remained together a big part oftheir life had to be kept secret from anyone involved. “Please,don’t leave me, darling.” Madeleine looked up at her husband,reaching out to cup his face. “I won't”, she replied, smiling atJumin despite the crushing weight in her chest. Why was the forbiddenfruit always the sweetest?

♛

When Madeleine came out ofthe bathroom her red curls were a mess, her face was pale and shelooked like she’d just seen a ghost. Two months had passed sinceshe’d given up on her search for answers, instead giving in to herhusband and the bond they shared. He’d convinced her that theyweren’t harming anyone and so far that had been true. The two of themwere happy and no one had suffered from their relationship, as no oneknew of it’s illegal nature. Madeleine had found solace in the factthat no one was harmed but them, until that morning.

“I’mpregnant”, she announced, voicing the fact making her entire bodyfill with dread. Apparently she was alone in that, however, as Jumininstantly jumped up from where he’d been perched on the bed, beamingfrom ear to ear as he approached his wife. He wrapped his arms aroundher and held her protectively, kissing all over her face and the topof her head before going to his knees and pressing a kiss to herstomach. “We’re going to be parents”, he said, cupping herstomach in awe. “Jumin, this is nothing to rejoice about!”Juminlooked up then, smile immediately replaced by confusion and hurt.“Don’t look at me like that”, Madeleine begged, taking a stepback so he was no longer touching her. “I accepted us, because ourrelationship was something that concerned only the two of us. Now wepulled another human being into this, though, and things change. Thebaby could be born severely damaged, Jumin. I don’t know how you canbe so happy about this! We share 25% of our DNA which means there isa 25% change for this child to be retarded in one way or another.”

Jumin stood up then,attempting to reach out for Madeleine only for his hands to beslapped away. His hurt melted away instantly, instead his neutralmask found its way back onto his face. It probably hurt Madeleinemore to see him that way than it would have to see him cry. It meantshe had caused him to feel unsure and insecure enough around her, tohide his feelings like he’d gotten used to over the years. She feltrotten, but she couldn’t back down. No matter how much the emptinessbehind his eyes killed her in that moment.

“I’ll make surethat it won’t happen. I’ll pay any sum necessary.”“That’snot the point, Jumin! Money won’t cancel out the fact that the genepool is too small for the child to have a good chance of beinghealthy”, Madeleine replied, more and more upset.

“This is our child,Madeleine. Why are you talking about it like it’s something bad? Wewanted to have kids, didn’t we?”

“Yes, but not like this!This child is an abomination. This goes beyond morality or law,Jumin. It would be inhumanly unfair to give birth to it…”“Sowhat should we do? Get rid of it”, Jumin snapped in reply,aggravated for the first time.

“It’s an option, yes”,Madeleine replied quietly, stunning her husband into silence. To himthis child was a blessing. It would be living, breathing proof oftheir love once born. It would be their little baby, half of thewoman he loved and half of him. How his wife could even consideraborting it, especially after they’d talked about having children assoon as possible, completely excited at the prospect, baffled theCEO. He was so blinded by the love and devotion he felt for his wifeand family that all reason had left him, leaving Jumin an irrationalmess.

“How could you say that”, Jumin whispered, voicecracking as he stared at his wife in terror. “What other option dowe have”, Madeleine snapped in response, losing her calm. She wasalmost three months in and soon it would be too late to get rid ofthe child if they so decided. “Keep it, raise it and love it nomatter what”, Jumin instantly replied. Once more he walked towardshis wife, resting both his hands on her yet flat stomach, closing hiseyes and smiling at the idea of it swelling with the life inside ofher. “That is not an option we can make as easily as othercouples, Jumin. We can’t even go to doctors, because they couldfigure out that you’re not only the babies father, but also it’suncle. People would ask questions. Not to mention what we’ll have toput the child through when it possibly asks questions. Must be niceto know that your parents are siblings”, Madeleine replied, drainedat this point. It was obvious that Jumin wasn’t listening and itwasn’t like she hadn’t wanted a child with her husband. She justdidn’t want it this way.“I’ll pay someone off then, makethem sign a non-disclosure agreement before testing our child’shealth”, Jumin replied, looking at his wife with hope shining inhis eyes. “We can be parents like we always wanted to, Madeleine.Whatever life might throw at us, we’ll handle it just as long as westick together. You and me forever, remember? Thick and thin?”Madeleine wanted to argue, but there was not a bit of energy left toher. Especially when Jumin wrapped his arms around her protectively,brushing his fingers through her hair and lulling her to safety.

♛

Madeleine miscarried mereweeks later. They’s just announced their pregnancy to the RFAmembers, as they’d passed the ‘safe’ mark of three months. Everyonehad been so ecstatic. After weeks of fights and discussions and Juminhaving talked her over Madeleine was still sceptic but happy. Thatwas until life took matters into its hands. The exact reasons wereunclear, but she herself assumed it was a mix of bad genes, a bodytoo weak to carry the child, the horrible stress she’d been throughover the past couple of months and a little bit of fate fucking herover once again.

That morning the youngwoman woke up to cramps and pain in her abdomen. However, seeing asshe was close to four months pregnant and cramps weren’t thatuncommon, Madeleine didn’t worry. She told Jumin who made sure shewas tugged in with a heating pack, a bunch of sweets and water withinreach and their workers on call. Nothing was to happen to his belovedwife. He asked whether she wanted him to stay at home with her, butMadeleine insisted that it was only half bad and that she’d be fine,sending her husband off with a tired smile.

The pain started to growworse over the course of the day, however, especially when Madeleinemoved anywhere out of bed. She attempted to calm herself, assuringherself over and over that everything would be fine. It had to be.Sadly, it wasn’t. The cramps got worse and worse, even upon takingwhat was supposed to be warm and relaxing bath. That is untilMadeleine opened her eyes to another, agonizing cramp only to findherself floating in her own blood. Madeleine screamed and scrambledout of the bathtub, tripping and falling in her desperate attempt toflee.

When the guards camerushing in, alarmed by the screams, Madeleine lay on the floorunconscious but still alive. They instantly wrapped her up in abathrobe and called an ambulance as quickly as human possible beforecontacting Jumin himself. Despite rushing he didn’t make it in timeto see his wife before operation. Upon asking doctors what hadhappened they explained that Madeleine had suffered from a prettyharsh miscarriage. As there was still fetal tissue inside her, theyhad to operate or otherwise she’d possibly die from infection.

It felt like an eternityuntil finally Madeleine was pushed out of the operating room. She wasasleep, but from the fact that her face wasn’t covered Jumin knew shewas still alive, sighing in relief. He watched her being wheeled intothe private room he paid the hospital for. Jumin wasn’t immediatelyallowed to enter, the doctors explaining that she needed a lot ofrest. Not only had she just lost a child but also a lot of blood.They told him to leave for the day, gather his wits and come to seehis wife the next morning when she was a little more stable.

Reluctantly Jumin left.Home alone the businessman found himself incapable of relaxing norable to focus on work. Whatever he tried to do to distract himselffrom the harsh reality, his mind remained riddled with agonizing fearand pain. At this point in time the young man was surprised that hewas still capable of such intense emotions. After all the losses he’dcounted over the years Jumin had thought of himself as immune to anypain. He was wrong. Very wrong. The night was spend rest – andsleepless, nervousness and guilt eating away at the man as he drownedhis worries in wine.

When the next morning cameJumin rushed to the hospital once more, eager to see his wife. Hishair was a wet mess, dark circles under his eyes ageing his face andhis clothes the same as the night before, only more crumpled and outof place. It didn’t matter, not in that moment. Jumin only worriedfor Madeleine and what state he would find her in, his sanitydecreasing by the minute. While his state was to no surprise it wasmerely a metaphor for the path his life was taking. He was losingcontrol of things and this was only the beginning.

This time, upon enteringthe hospital, Jumin was allowed to go through. Madeleine was awake,sitting upright in her bed and staring outside the window. The youngman could have cried tears of joy in that moment, happy to see heralive and breathing. However, Jumin’s body was soon overwhelmed withdread as – upon gently touching her shoulder – Madeleine merelyturned her head to him without further reaction. She didn’t speak.Didn’t reach out for his hand or even slap it away. She didn’t move,smile or scream. Nothing.

Her eyes looked empty, like she wasaware of someone’s presence, but couldn’t make anything of it.Whatever Jumin said, no reply ever came. He was about to break downwhen suddenly the door opened behind him and he snapped around. “Whathappened to her”, he shouted, hands balling to fists. “What didyou do to her?” The doctor raised his hands, attempting to calmJumin down. “I am sorry, Mr. Han, but there is nothing we couldhave done. In fact, no one could have prevented this from happening,as it has nothing to do with her physical condition.”Theman went on to explain that Madeleine was catatonic; a state in whichshe appeared to be in a daze or stupor, completely unresponsive tothe world. They couldn’t exactly pinpoint the reason for falling intosuch a state – it would be anything from PTSD, depression or aninfection due to her miscarriage – but there was very little theycould do, as Madeleine didn’t seem to react to the meds given to her.If she ever came out of that state, it was something that the youngwoman had to do on her own. The shock had simply been too much.Fora moment Jumin stood completely still, face almost as empty as hiseyes, before something inside of him snapped. He gripped his wivesshoulders and desperately began to shake her, tears streaming downhis face. “You promised! You promised you wouldn’t leave! Now comeback to me. Come back at once”, he shouted at his wife. “Youcan’t leave me too, Madeleine. Not you. I lost everyone. I losteveryone and our child and now I’m losing you? No! No, I won’t letthat happen! Wake up, Madeleine. Wake up for fucks sake. Not you!”

Jumin had to be draggedout of the room, visitation rights taken from him for the time being.Not that he would have come either way. He couldn’t bring himself to.Instead Jumin coped the only way he knew how; by drowning himself inanything but his pain. He worked like an animal, cutting Jaehee’shours in half by taking over all the tasks he would have given toher, usually. He worked out excessively, no longer satisfied withonly playing golf. Instead he used the treadmill for hours at thetime amongst other things. He barely ate but drank a lot, barelyslept and yet never left the house.

Months passed without himso much as glancing at his phone, ignoring the RFA, the members andeven the chat. It was on one particularly lonely night that Juminmade the mistake of looking through some of the chats. They’ddiscussed Madeleine for weeks, everyone angry that Jumin didn’t seemto care, calling him every name in the book. For a while Jaehee andYoosung had actually attempted to defend him against the rest, butsoon gave up on their friend as well. Zen was especially made,disgusted by Jumin like he’d never been before. He couldn’t blame theactor.

“He’s a pathetic piece of shit! His wife just lost ababy and felt so depressed that she went catatonic and instead ofbeing with her, attempting to somehow get her back by talking to herhe just goes about life like nothing happened! He’s disgusting”,Zen wrote in one of the chats. “Just kick him out of the group.He’s become useless anyway. All he cares for is himself and his ownneeds. If he can’t care for his wife, how could he care for anorganization.” It wasn’t until he read a recent message about‘being glad he’s gone’ that Jumin realized Zen was right.

He had become useless.Jumin had failed his father, his wife, his child and even his friendsand the organization he’d dedicated a big part of his life to. Foodand wine had lost their taste. The bed had lost its comfort withouthis beloved Madeleine to share it with. He’d given up Elizabeth the3rd, not even sure whom the security guards had given herto. Sleep was harsh if it came at all and the world had grown darkwhere it once had shone bright. There was nothing to live for soJumin decided to make one last selfless decision: rid the world of auseless man.

[routinely-unamoosed-blog]

Madalyn Nicole Rayner

A/N: Hi! I’m happy you stumbled upon this little text post about my OFC, Maddie. In the fanfiction Horrors and Hunters (read book 1 here and book 2 here if you’d like! DISCONTINUED, SORRY), you’ll follow Maddie—a mutant who happens to be the number one feared being in all of Heaven. Hopefully, this page can help fill you in on what Maddie is all about.

Brief History of the Rayners

There’s a certain set of rules in the business of hunting, preferably derived from the location of Lincoln, Nebraska. The following rules are to be acknowledged to at all times:

1. Don’t piss off a Rayner.

2. Don’t piss off a Rayner.

3. Don’t. Piss. Off. A. Rayner.

The surname Rayner can’t be said without a few suspicious glances a Hunter’s way or a chill running down one’s spine. Nothing nice or even remotely kind can be said about the primordial bloodline. Death is celebrated amongst the lineage. Ingesting angel grace is said to give a Hunter extraordinary powers.

Powerful members have come and gone, some dying of old age and others far too soon; some marriages were even betrothed by cherubs, the least common angel to ever survive while being in the presence of a Rayner; for instance, the husband and wife who would adopt the last living Rayner in its heritage: Dante and Lilian Rayner.

Hunters then and now always have a story to tell about the Rayners, whether it be that one time Andrew Rayner looked Lucifer right in the eye and told him to fuck off, or when Lillian beat the living shit out of an angel so bad that its control center malfunctioned and spilled the entire plans of Heaven for the next three hundred years. But one thing’s for certain: no story is as big as the last Rayner falling for Sam Winchester.

Meet Maddie

Torture was always quite an art. In Rayner terms, it was the fastest way to get something to talk. Or it was just for the thrill of the screaming, the blood running down hands that were made to cause so much pain … but for X-948293, it was painstakingly agonizing.

She underwent fourteen years of the art. Fourteen years of being strapped down to an autopsy table while her screams bounced off the metal walls she called home. Torture was the only thing she knew of. The bliss of falling into that realm of unconsciousness only lasted hours when adrenaline was pumped through her again by her creator, Dr. Adam Stephen Dauer.

Life for X-948293 was a blur (sir..). One minute she wasn’t alive and the next she has her organs exposed to a laboratory a year later. Being created from scratch by Adam Dauer seemed fun on the latter’s end: no genetic disorders, no chronic ailments or potential diseases forming like Alzheimer’s or cancer. Taking the nickname Pilot, X-948293—later to be known as Maddie when she began complaining—was a fighter and a leader despite her being the only experiment to ever succeed in Adam’s line of work.

The very presence of Maddie made Adam’s demeanor change from cool and collected to downright sadistic in a matter of seconds. The smell of sage and coconut made Adam insane with the grinding feeling of wanted to be with her, to love her, to feel her. A widower of three years, Adam saw an innocent child in Maddie, and he loved her like his daughter who died in his wife’s arms while she bled to death.

Adam didn’t love her; he worshiped every scream, every struggle, everything she did like a gift sent from God.

Maddie grew up. She grew up to become a beautiful and genetically perfect human being with one minor setback: wings. With avian DNA fused with her human DNA, Maddie was physically stronger than anyone/thing, including Adam; not to mention her pain tolerance was much higher than a human’s.

But Adam raised her to be submissive. Control her emotions; channel the pain he gave her in a different and unhealthy way, like strangling fellow scientists that Adam was too lazy to relieve of their duties. Submission was always present in her behavior while at the lab. She never misbehaved towards her creator; never lashed out angrily when he hurt her just a little too much despite her pain tolerance. She’d shrink back when Adam yelled; she would do as he said no matter what the task was without objection.

During her fourteenth year with Adam, the man had gotten needy. Desperate for human attraction. His assistant, Dr. Sabrina Moisson, had previously had a sexual relationship with him, however it hadn’t lasted long due to disagreements on Maddie’s condition during a week’s worth of purposeful starvation, to “study how her body would cope with extended periods of inanition,” how Adam described it. Needy is the best adjective to describe him after the breakup with Moisson.

Adam soon became obsessed; preoccupied about what else he could do to Maddie while she remained tied down and vulnerable to all things horrendous and inhumane on Adam’s part. So preoccupied that he wasn’t completely aware that the CDC was looking into an anonymous complaint about human experimentation and torture. On January 13, 1999, the CDC and FBI stormed the laboratory tucked deep in the Rocky Mountains, arrested Adam on illegal experimentation charges, and took every experiment they could find, including Maddie.

While in captivity for three months, she made sure that she made her captors live in hell. She’d lash out every time they went near her cage and killed one scientist by biting his throat until he bled out. 

She finally snapped when they threatened to strap her down to a table. Thirty-eight scientists died that day when she snapped one of their necks and yanked another’s heart out of her chest. Maddie used their deaths as a diversion to break free from the CDC and feel the sun on her face for the first time. She’s still wanted after seventeen years.

A month later after living on the streets and cautiously flirting her way into bars to drink, Maddie was caught by police late at night and thrown into an orphanage. The place was chaotic, with screaming kids and teenagers with the lung capacity of an Olympic swimmer’s.  It was something she grew to annoy from the constant racket. Employees there knew how old she was; older than any of the girls at the shelter. Most of the boys tried either flirting with her or trying to get in her pants, which she kindly declined with a middle finger or a few punches to the bits.

Then a somewhat miracle happened. A woman by the name of Lilian came in with her daughter, Danielle, and adopted her. She was shocked to see how sad the woman was despite her smile when Maddie slid into the car. Danielle, however, couldn’t control her happiness at having a sister. What Maddie wouldn’t forget for the rest of her life were the massive bruises and cuts on Danielle’s arms and thighs.

She spent six years with Lilian, Danielle, and Dante, the father of the household. Six years of training to kill all things Heavenly made Maddie into the most ruthless person alive. Powers popped up over those years, such as her wings tightened around her spine when angels were nearby, or the chemical high she got when she consumed angel grace.

Plus a teenie tiny ability to control Hellhounds.

She and Danielle—who she grew to call Dani—had bonded over some time, becoming the best of friends despite the beatings Dante gave them both. Twice did Maddie lash out at Dante, landing a few punches here and there to set the man straight. But all that gave her was the torture of a lifetime as if she was an angel.

It wasn’t until November 2, 2005, did the inevitable happen. Maddie had actually gone to school after she escaped from Adam and the CDC, and was visiting a local college did she return to see her father with a bullet hole in his chest; Lilian with handprints around her throat; and Dani with her chest cavity revealed to the world, along with a missing heart. Maddie mourned Dani’s death heavily than she should have, nearly drinking herself into unconsciousness five times in a week.

Because she was still a teenager and not a legal adult, Maddie was thrown into foster care for four months. The Wright family waltzed into her life and adopted her as their sixth child.

And let’s just say they fucking sucked at raising her.

The family, along with their five other kids, were completely oblivious to the hunting life. The heedlessness made her smile every time she found a case in a newspaper one Sunday morning, or when there was a case right in their town of Louisville, Nebraska. Of course, she’d sneak out and kill whatever was hurting her neighbors, but all Mrs. Wright did was ask why she got this cut here, or why she snuck out at two in the morning and returned covered in blood and sweat.

After two months of being driven to insanity with this family, Maddie just got up and left. Her “siblings” were distraught, as were Mr. and Mrs. Wright, but she honestly give a damn about any of them.

Hunting, then, took over her life. She had enough money to handle herself for a few months, and pay motel bills when she finished a case. Overall, she’d traveled to almost twenty-six states with cases, finishing them in about a day.

Then, rumors began spreading around the Hunter community that she was the last Rayner. Hunters all over grew paranoid, getting the hell out of dodge when she happened to be in the same town as them. A few tolerated her, such as Tanner Hanning, who hunted with her for a while in Crete.

At the age of twenty-one, Maddie enrolled in college after graduating high school (she was held back twice for fighting). She got into three colleges: Stanford, Purdue, and Princeton for her Magna Cum Laude in her Latin class—she was taught Latin and Enochian by Dani, both of which she’s fluent in—and her unbelievable track career. She accepted Purdue’s invitation and majored in Fine Arts to become a photographer. There, she met Tyler Whitton, an incredibly handsome man who majored in Law Enforcement. Tyler and Maddie hit it off very well, eventually becoming a couple after three months of hanging out.

But what she didn’t know was that she was being watched by a demon during her sophomore year.

Jeredrith, a very high-ranked demon that was keen on killing humans, swooped in and possessed a roommate of Maddie’s and played dumb with her for months. He asked her questions about her family, all of which Maddie ignored or gave phony answers to that Jeredrith knew were wrong. Tyler, completely oblivious to his awaiting fate, invited the Rayner to a party at his sister’s near campus.

All Jeredrith did afterward was possess Maddie and stab the hell out of Tyler until he died in her arms. The only thing Maddie remembered was everything.

A month later, Maddie spent ninety years in Hell after she sold her soul for Tyler to be brought back. Her time was brief. Sure underwent the worst of the torture, but managed to escape through Purgatory.

That’s when the bounty hunts began. With the increasing rumors of Crowley’s suicide, demons begin making their own rules, most of which consisted of hunting down Maddie Rayner and dragging her back to Hell for the rest of eternity.

2008 was a strange year for the Rayner. She had continued hunting and killing angels after her family died, and by then, Maddie had grown used to blood running down her fingers or the feel of purity coursing through her veins at the ingestion of grace. A certain angel’s grace looked particularly delicious, but before she could drink it, sickening words flew from the angel’s mouth. “Dean Winchester is saved.” Just after that did the grace course down her throat before she stabbed the Heavenly asshole in the eye.

Winchester was an all too familiar name to her; to every Hunter, as a matter of fact. Dante and Lilian were tempted by the Winchesters, although they hadn’t told her or Dani to avoid them at any time before their deaths. It was wise for her, anyhow, to avoid them to be safe.

Six years later, however, a phone call from none other than Dean Winchester did she pick up the call. And that was when her life would spiral into the Winchesters’ forever.

Dean would tap that

[thisgingerneedsherjinglejuice]

Beca Mitchell hadn’t ever pictured kids as part of her life. She realizes that that’s probably not a shocking thing to hear, given one look at her.

Successful producer and artist who has a busy life in the music industry? A propensity to always don leather on her person in some form? Multiple tattoos and a blatantly displayed “fuck off” attitude? A habit of getting in trouble for lashing out at paparazzi? Check, check, check, and check.

Oh, and, you know - a wife.

But, truth be told, Beca wasn’t really completely opposed to the idea. Beyond her plans to make a career out of music, Beca’s idea of the future had always been incredibly vague – probably marry some cute guy, maybe not, and live in a house in the LA hills with room for a home recording studio. Beca didn’t actively dislike children, but she was absolutely unwilling to ever be pregnant or carry a child – the very idea horrified her - and so kids hadn’t ever been part of the nebulous idea of her American Dream.

But the day Beca agreed to hitch her cart to Chloe Beale for good, Beca knew that everything she had tenuously drawn out for her future was out the window. There was no way in hell that bubbly, happy, “squeals and coos over random babies in public” Chloe Beale was going to be satisfied with a house full of music and recording equipment instead of irritatingly noisy light-up toys and scattered legos.

So Beca redrew her plans. As long she wasn’t going to have to do any of the hard work of growing a human being and dealing with her body essentially being under the control of an invader for the better part of a year, kids were fine. Sign her up!

Of course, Chloe did. Literally. She waited until they’d had two years to settle into their new life in LA before signing them up for some ridiculous workshop for LGBT couples and their “family building options”. Beca hated every moment, making no attempt to hide her scowl or how she tuned out the lecturer, and daydreaming about how she’d rather be spending the gorgeous summer day at the beach. At the end of the 4-hour prison sentence, Beca turned to Chloe in the car and stated that (obviously, Beca thought, but tactfully left that part out) they would find a sperm donor and Chloe would carry the baby and that would be that.

Chloe simply nodded.

What it came down to was that Beca didn’t mind kids, but she wasn’t super invested in the idea… and she kind of wanted to strangle Chloe when it took her six extra weeks of indecisiveness to choose between donor #21NHS and #TRC12. Because, “21NHS had a grandfather with heart problems, but TRC12 only has his BA in anthropology compared to his Ph.D. in biochemistry!” Beca patiently discussed the same points over and over so not to upset Chloe with a “lack of interest” in the overly clinical part of the process, but the twelfth time reminding Chloe that the donor’s financial status, educational level, and even his height wasn’t directly heritable was starting to feel a lot more like torture than starting a family.

Chloe’s goal was to select a donor that resembled Beca as much as possible, and despite Beca pointing out the flaws in that logic (such as the fact that any man who met the minimum 5’9” height requirement to donate meant that they’d have little in common with her tiny 5’2” form), Chloe was excellent at maintaining her selective hearing and attention.

When Chloe finally made up her mind about which donor to choose, Beca rejoiced – until Chloe immediately started dithering about the decision again. Beca, thinking fast, managed to distract Chloe before they hit the critical point.

“Chlo, isn’t it sort of bizarre that we could pass by our future kid’s father in the street and never know? I’m kind of weirded out about that.”

“Beca, ten million people live in LA. That’s statistically unlikely. And… I don’t know, Becs, being half of the genetic makeup of our kid doesn’t mean he’s the father, you know? Being a dad isn’t just about genetics -“

“Yeah, and my dad is case in point on that one. I know what you’re saying; I’m not, like, feeling insecure about being displaced by some mystery dude or blah blah blah, it’s just… weird. That someone can be part of something so momentous and not have a clue, you know? …And now I want to know what the actual statistics are. I’m texting Jessica.”

“Beca Mitchell, do not tell her why you’re asking!”

The next day, Beca stumbled out of their bedroom after a nap to find Chloe sitting at the kitchen table. Spread in front of her was enough paperwork to have used at least one full tree, separated into several individual mounds. Chloe looked up and smiled at Beca, who made quite a sight with one side of her hair – the side she normally sleeps on - smooshed up and tangled around one of her ear piercings, the other side still in the neat waves she’d styled to go to the studio earlier that morning.

She held out her arms and Beca let out a yawn as she sunk into Chloe’s lap, slumping into her chest for warmth as she shivered slightly in the cooler air of the open room. Chloe folded her arms around Beca’s slight form and pressed a kiss against her hairline, and Beca hummed in contentment as Chloe’s warmth seeped into her.

“What’s all this?” Beca gestured at the papers, her voice still hoarse from sleep.

“Well, this is the paperwork to deal with our insurance for the fertility coverage stuff – pretty much done, we just have to fill a few more things in – and the booklet of in-network doctors we have to choose from. So I looked them all up and pulled up information about their practices, success rates, pricing if I could find it, all that good stuff.” Chloe explained. Pointing at each stack as she listed it off, Chloe gestured to the rest of the piles. “So we have to choose between Dr. Jabara, Dr. March, Dr. Rodi, Dr. Beavers, Dr. Marrs, and-“

“Wait!” Beca interrupted her recitation. “You’re telling me we can choose a doctor named Doctor Beavers?!” Chloe just nodded in response, a smile playing at her lips as Beca laughed uproariously. “Yeah. Okay. Decision made.” Beca said once she gained control of herself, resolutely scooping up the appropriate mound and making a show of knocking the stack against the table until it was perfectly aligned. “There’s no way in hell that we’re not going to have someone named Dr. Beavers help make our kid.”

Chloe acquiesced with the choice– partially because she was well-familiar at this point with Beca’s whims and stubbornness, but also partially (largely, if she was being perfectly honest) because she also found “Dr. Beavers” hilarious.

Beca was happy to let her juvenile reputation take the fall for that one, though.

The IUI process was…. much stranger than Beca had been anticipating. Somehow, she’d never put much thought into exactly how that whole “insemination” thing actually happened. (Perhaps on purpose?) The tanks of frozen sperm that they’d ordered were one of the strangest things Beca had ever tried to wrap her head around. And the sight of a balding middle-aged man between her wife’s legs spread in the detested stirrups, shooting some stranger’s spunk all up in there was extremely awkward to be privy to. And for all her amusement about their reproductive endocrinologist being named Dr. Beavers, of all things, Beca soon realized that she was far too awkward to actually use his name at all when he was about to be in her wife’s vagina. Chloe had a difficult time restraining her laughter every time Beca, tongue-tied, tripped over her words trying to talk in circles to avoid the necessity of directing the doctor by name. (And Beca suspected she made a point of using his name more than necessary to see how many times she could get Beca to blush, but she couldn’t prove it unless Chloe chose to confess, which she hadn’t - yet.)

And when the first month wasn’t successful, Beca still wasn’t any more prepared for her discomfort with the whole situation on the repeat attempts as summer slipped into fall.

A few days after Thanksgiving, Beca was hard at work in her office deeply zoned in to the track she was fiddling with, when a message alert popped up on her computer – the only person who was set to bypass the “do not disturb” filter was Chloe – and pulled her out of her total immersion. Chloe’s message contained nothing but a picture, and not one of the selfies Chloe was prone to sending her throughout the week. It was a conglomeration of numbers and big words and Beca, still coming out of her daze, blinked blearily at it as she tried to decipher what she was seeing.

Chloe-hcg.gif

It took her a full twenty seconds to realize what she was looking at, and once the realization hit her, the shock kept her frozen for thirty more.

Then she moved. She tapped on Chloe’s name as she swiped the phone up to her ear, then shook anxiously in her chair and chewed on her finger as she waited for Chloe to answer. It only took two rings before Chloe picked up, obviously having been waiting just as anxiously for Beca to call. She didn’t even squeeze out a hello before her flabbergasted laughter sounded in Beca’s ear.

“Chlo. I need… Tell me what I’m looking at here. I need you to tell me.” Beca pleaded.

Chloe let out one more breathless laugh before she could form words. “Dr. Beavers –“

“Chloe!” Beca growled out ominously, and Chloe had to let out a giggle at her own inability to miss taking an opportunity to rile Beca up before she could continue.

“That’s the result from my blood test. My hCG level is 69 which Dr. Beavers said is ‘a positive result’, Becs.”

“Positive? Positive for… So… that means…” Beca whispered in shock.

“I’m pregnant, Becs.” Beca swore she could feel Chloe’s indubitable grin through the phone. “He said that my beta level is perfectly average, smack dab in the middle of the range. We’ll have to test it again a couple of times in the next few days so we can make sure it’s rising appropriately, but he said based on this first reading he thinks it’s viable and that having twins or something is unlikely.”

“Oh my god, Chlo!” Beca breathed out, still stunned and struggling to keep up with Chloe’s words. “That’s – I – So… We’re having a baby? Oh my god, we’re having a baby!” Beca couldn’t even begin to contain her elation over the news.

“We’re having a baby, Becs.” Chloe sniffled in confirmation.

Hearing Chloe lapse into tears broke the little restraint Beca had left, and the water she had been blinking back spilled over. She searched her desk frantically for a tissue, giving up when she couldn’t find any and letting out an embarrassed sniffle instead.

“Becs, are you crying?” Chloe asked incredulously.

“No!” Beca denied, and then sniffled again. Chloe let out a watery laugh, shaking her head even though she knew Beca couldn’t see her.

“Okay, Becs.” Chloe teased. “You can cry about having a kid, that’s not going to wreck your ‘badass rep’. No one’s going to judge you for that.”

Beca let out a watery laugh of her own, slipping easily into the familiar dynamic.

“Whatever, Chloe. You can’t prove anything. Maintenance of my reputation is very important.” Beca paused for a few seconds, thinking, then continued a little more soberly. “I’m coming home, Chlo.”

“What? Right now? Becs, it’s only 3:30. Aren’t you supposed to be there for another… what, three hours today?”

“Chlo, I can do whatever the hell I want. I’ll work from home later if it makes you feel better, but I’m coming home.”

Chloe capitulated right away, already on her way home herself. Beca scooped up her stuff and waved at Gia as she scampered out the front door of the studio, shouting that she’d explain later but she was headed home for the day and not even waiting for a response before letting the door slam shut behind her.

Beca managed not to leave work particularly early the two times in the following week when Chloe reported to her the follow-up results – numbers rising perfectly, according to Dr. Beavers. But even the new band she’d been working with for all of three weeks noted her obvious distraction. She had to work at not being too obvious as she played it off; she and Chloe had decided not to share the news with anyone until the safety of the second trimester. And as the media had started showing more interest in Beca as Grammy season approached, she was particularly worried about the news being leaked to the tabloids. That meant – Beca sighed to herself as she calculated – another two months of explaining away her weird behavior at work.

Beca was in for a rough couple of months; but then, Chloe wasn’t much better. She almost slipped up at least twice a week, and the only reason her fumbling cover ups were taken at face value was how accustomed everyone was to Chloe being, well, Chloe.

Chloe’s first ultrasound ended up being scheduled right on the day Chloe hit six weeks, and both women took the entire day off to devote to the appointment and each other. Beca insisted there was no way in hell she was going to miss it. The clinical, research-oriented part of the whole process they’d started during the summer was – well, book learning had never been Beca’s favorite thing, to put it lightly. But now that the baby – their baby - was an actual living thing, Beca was all in. They were able to hear the heartbeat for the first time, and Beca was even able to look past the awkwardness of the ultrasound wand having to be inserted for a transvaginal ultrasound – Beca had thought the time of “watching old dudes stick things in my wife’s vagina” had passed, but apparently she was wrong – to get emotional about the momentous occasion. This time it was Beca’s tears that set off Chloe’s.

If Chloe caught Beca crying over the print-out of the ultrasound several times later that week, or caught a glance of Beca’s email account filling up with “Your baby week-by-week” emails from multiple different sites – well, it’s likely she just smiled and didn’t mention it.

When Chloe reached eight weeks without incident they decided it wasn’t really failure if they shared their news with a few select people. They wanted to deliver the news as “face to face” as they could, what with being across the country from everyone else now, so they Skyped with Chloe’s parents and then each of her brothers in turn. When they Skyped with Aubrey next, Beca summed up the first experience with the Beales with an eyeroll and an explanation of “there were too many tears.” (Chloe couldn’t resist pointing out that some of which were hers; Beca ignored this and moved the conversation on with her chin held high.)

When they told the rest of the Bellas the following week – Chloe needed the extra time to figure out how to work a Google hangout so they could video chat with the whole group at the same time – the reactions were pretty much as expected. Amy immediately started listing off weird pieces of advice that were “Australian tradition” (Beca very much doubted that feeding the baby nothing but kangaroo milk for the first two years was a common Australian custom, for instance). Stacie made a couple of vagina jokes and then immediately started checking with her industry contacts about which doctors to refer them to. Emily, Jessica, and Ashley all cried, and Lily asked about the dimensions for the future nursery and how sturdy their current weapons cabinet was.

So, it went well.

Everything was going well, actually. And it kind of freaked Beca out. Chloe was nearing the end of the first trimester and all of the email subscriptions and websites and okay, yes, even a few books, were full of reassurance that “morning sickness will start waning soon.”

But Chloe hadn’t had… any, really. Occasional nausea, but nothing particularly disruptive, and she’d only puked twice the entire pregnancy – one of which she still insisted was due to bad food. Her boobs were a little sore, and maybe marginally bigger, but they couldn’t really tell and she was still fitting into her usual bras so it didn’t really matter. She was a tiny bit more tired than usual – but only capitulated to that by heading to bed about a half-hour earlier than she used to. There was none of the “bone-deep weariness” that other women of the same gestation were complaining about, and Chloe hadn’t taken up the napping habit that Beca had halfway expected.

So, Beca did what she did best and worried. She worried that Chloe not feeling sick meant that something was wrong, and then she felt awful for basically wanting her wife to feel terrible and vomit all the time and not have enough energy to get out of bed. When she started worrying that her worrying was going to make her a bad mom, Chloe stopped her in her tracks by grabbing her and forcing her to eat a few marshmallows before making out with her for awhile, so at least the last worry got put to bed for awhile due to distraction.

And Beca found it really helped when the worries literally got “put to bed” when Chloe attempted to sidetrack her.

They saw Dr. Beavers for the final time when Chloe was 9.5 weeks along. He did one last ultrasound (everything looked perfect, he repeatedly assured Beca) and Beca was the only one who cried while hearing the heartbeat again, something the doctor looked a tiny bit disconcerted about, before cheerfully discharging them from the practice to start seeing a regular OB/GYN.

After they spent a week looking through their options and speaking to a few different practices on the phone, Chloe turned to Beca with an anxious look on her face one night over dinner.

“Becs, don't freak out. I don’t want you to freak out when you hear what I’m about to say, okay?”

Beca stared at her unmoving and eyes wide for a moment before responding. “Erm, Chlo, when you start off with that, it just makes me want to freak out before I even hear it.” She took a deep breath and held it for a second before blowing it noisily out. “No, okay, I lied actually. I don’t want to freak out. Now I already am freaking out so I need you to spit the rest out, like, now, okay? Are you okay? Is something wrong? Oh my god, is the baby okay? Is something wrong with the baby? Do we need to go to the hospital? What do you need me to do?” Beca spat the questions at her wife in rapid-fire, getting more and more worked up as she spiraled down into the grip of the worst-case scenarios she harbored in her mind.

Chloe gaped at how quickly the situation had deteriorated before jumping out of her chair and crossing around the table to where Beca was seated. She gripped her firmly and turned her so that Beca was looking straight at her, and then Chloe cut off the frantic queries that Beca was still regurgitating.

“Becs! BECA! No! Everything is fine, I’m fine, the baby is fine. God, I’m so sorry. Take a breath, please.” Chloe pulled her into a tight hug and Beca shuddered a ragged breath into her shoulder.

“Fuck.” She breathed weakly on her next exhale, trying to match her uneven breaths to Chloe’s more steady rhythm. “Don’t ever do that to me again, Chloe.” She said as she lifted her head off Chloe’s collarbone a couple of minutes later to look her in the eye.

Chloe looked more contrite than Beca had ever seen her, clearly cut up about the panic she had unintentionally sent her wife into. “I’m so sorry, babe. I was just trying to prepare you for an idea that I’m not sure you’ll like. I was not trying to freak you out like that, I swear.”

“I know, I know.” Beca soothed her now-distraught wife. “It’s not even your fault, really. I’ve just been… kind of on edge about something going wrong. It only took a tiny nudge to send me over that edge since I’ve been dangling myself off of it for weeks.”

Chloe snorted. “Yeah, hon. You haven’t been doing a good job hiding your anxiety at all, just for the record. Who would have suspected that out of the two of us, you were going to turn out to be the helicopter parent?”

Beca shot Chloe a mock glare at the teasing, then her expression morphed into something almost – entreating? “Yeah, I just, uh… “ Beca swallowed twice before she was able to bring herself to continue. “I’ve just been… it’s like, I still can’t believe I’m married to you, Chlo. I’ve spent every single day of the last nine years in total disbelief that I get to have you because I have never been the person that lucky things happen to. And you are the luckiest thing that has ever happened to me. And then here we are in LA and I got my fucking dream job by some random happenstance… and now we’re having a baby. Chloe Beale and I are having a baby which just… My life is so good right now, Chloe. Our life is so good it’s fucking amazing and I can’t even really wrap my head around it, so I’ve been sitting here for the last 2 months waiting for the other shoe to drop because it has to drop at some point, right? I’m not a lucky person, things can’t just stay this good. And I want to be prepared, I don’t want to be taken off guard when the shoe finally drops. I won’t be able to take that, not again, Chlo.” Both women were openly weeping by the end of her outburst, and Chloe could feel her heart breaking for her wife as Beca’s last sentence sunk in.

Of course, this was about her parents. The parents that maintained a cordial but distant contact with their only daughter because of the life choices they disagreed with. The parents that had passed down a lifetime of anxiety and mistrust to their daughter through their own poorly handled relationship troubles. Beca had spent quite a bit of time in therapy dealing with the legacy of her broken childhood and troubled adolescence, and 99% of the time it was possible to forget how far Beca had come and how much she had grown in the last decade.

But this was the 1% of the time, when Beca’s past clung tightly enough that she was afraid to trust her happiness for fear of lurking instability.

Chloe briefly felt a swell of pure, hot rage at Beca’s parents, immediately tamping it down before Beca noticed and assumed it was directed at her. She tugged a stiff and still silently crying Beca out of her chair, sitting down in her place before pulling Beca back down into her lap and cradling her into her body. Beca fought it briefly, rigid in Chloe’s embrace, before giving in and curling into Chloe with a strangled sob.

“Beca, Beca, Beca.” Chloe murmured as she brushed Beca’s hair back with her fingers soothingly. “Honey. I don’t… I can tell you that nothing is wrong right now. Actually, everything is perfect, because you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I thank the stars every day for you. Literally, you know? Every morning when I wake up with you sleeping next to me, your hair in my mouth at all, I spend a minute smiling at the sun and thanking whoever or whatever might be listening that this gets to be my life. That you get to be my life. And now I get to wake up in the morning and be thankful that I get to have you and this baby in my life from now on, and I literally cried with happiness yesterday, Becs. Which was why your hair was a little damp when you woke up.” Chloe laughed through her tears. “And I can’t promise that nothing will be wrong in the future, I’m not clairvoyant…. But I can promise you that if that shoe of yours ever does drop, I’m going to be right here next to you helping you catch it. You’re not the only one that has to hold it up any more.”

Beca’s emotions were still running high – higher than any other time Chloe had been witness to, with two exceptions – and she could only bring herself to nod several times against Chloe’s body while the sobs continued to rip out of her unbidden. Chloe sat and waited patiently, sporadically rocking in a calming motion and hugging Beca tightly to her the whole time, even as her legs went numb. All she could do was offer comfort while Beca struggled to rein in her tumultuous emotions, her heart hurting for Beca’s internal struggle. Eventually, Beca cried herself out and fell into an exhausted sleep in Chloe’s arms. Chloe carried her to bed, smiling sadly to herself as she did so, at the scene that had become so familiar over the years – although not usually tinged with so much sadness.

Chloe returned to the kitchen to choke down a few bites of the cold and long-forgotten dinner – she wasn’t hungry after all of that, but she felt obligated to eat at least a little bit due to that whole “growing a human being” thing. She tucked the rest of the leftovers away into the fridge before heading back to their bedroom. She changed into her pajamas and brushed her teeth quietly, peeking in on Beca twice while she did so, although Beca didn’t stir even a bit. It was barely eight, but Chloe was just as exhausted from the emotional evening and she gratefully crawled into bed; but before she could cuddle into her tear-stained wife, she had one last thing to do. She grabbed her phone off her nightstand and shot an email off to Beca’s therapist back in Georgia, inquiring about the possibility of setting up a Skype session in the next week. The check-in would do Beca good, Chloe knew, as much as it upset her to admit that she wasn’t able to be everything Beca needed sometimes, that she wasn’t able to just fix it.

But Beca didn’t need rescuing, she just needed an objective party to remind her of her own strength.

That taken care of, Chloe nestled happily into Beca’s side, the tinier figure automatically shifting to wrap herself around Chloe. As Beca’s hair landed in her mouth, Chloe couldn’t help but laugh even as she sputtered.

Yeah, this was right where she wanted to be, Chloe thought, as she drifted off.

Chloe woke, as always, before Beca the next morning and started cooking up Beca’s favorite Nutella French toast. She deserved something special after the previous night, after all. She was almost done when Beca walked out of the bedroom, still yawning and eyes tiny from sleep. She stole up behind Chloe and wrapped her arms around her midsection and planting her chin on Chloe’s shoulder – as best she could, anyway. She made a show of a dramatic sniff and hummed happily when she realized what Chloe was making.

“Good morning. Nutella french toast? Fuck, this is the best day ever.” Beca said, as she moved to plate a couple of pieces already cooling on the stack, sighing in pleasure as she stuck her nose in the small pile to take another big whiff. “Thank you.” Beca pressed a kiss to Chloe’s temple. She wrinkled her nose a bit when Chloe just hummed contentedly in response. Beca gently angled Chloe’s head towards her with her free hand, meeting her eyes intently. “Thank you, Chlo.”

Chloe nodded and simply gave Beca a quick kiss, clearly aware of how little she liked making a big deal of emotional matters.

Halfway through breakfast, Beca awkwardly cleared her throat before broaching the topic weighing on her mind. “So, uh… what were you even going to say last night?”

Chloe’s mouth dropped into an “O” shape – it had completely slipped her mind, to be honest. Now it was her turn to swallow nervously before answering.

“Oh. Uh. Right. Well, after looking into all those OBs this week… I just don’t get a great vibe off of any of them? I mean, at least one of them was clearly homophobic. They all seem to be paternalistic older guys and… I really can’t imagine that feeling patronized the whole time is going to be conducive to easily pushing a human being out of my vagina, you know?.”

Beca grimaced at the mental image Chloe was evoking, but nodded for her to continue.

“Right. Well. Along with the OB recommendations she sent us, Stacie included a couple of… other recommendations.” Frankly, the tone Chloe was using and the way she stressed the last two was about to send Beca’s eyebrows up into her hairline.

“Okay… so, what ‘other recommendations’ did she send? The baby can’t be delivered by, like, a sexologist or whatever.” Chloe snorted at Beca’s theory.

“No, not a sexologist, Bec. But she did include information for a couple of local midwives.”

[hgfstreamchats]

El Arca

Hello! Hello there! paused Castlevania for christian lion sex Castlevania would understand. but they just found the giant demon that I very much wish to smooch!!! Is the sound functioning? tis! Excellent! Oh, there we go Sound seems okay Well, in that case, I won't delay! Onto the lions we go. It was being... "funny" he wants a cursed kids show he should go watch donkey ollie agin Deleting my messages and so on OH NO NOAHS ARK Ahh, I see you're ahead of the game! I'm deeply suspicious already. did Saberspark ever upload his edited version that includes *all* the jokes You'll love it, night human. It's got lovingly rendered animal excrement. No, but this is the uncut version. oh good Jesus it does not help that they have regular human hands youre gonna see chicken strips, night When you say "chicken strips"... do you mean that a chicken strips? you'll see mr.... noseybonk.... jesus fucking christ And fire. Uh.... yeaah that's about normal for discord servers As you can see, we're off to a great start. prostitutes thinkin he's Zeus

Ha! HAH! I really dont wanna see that one dude's teeth like that again This seems.  Familiar but not too familiar.... Oh man you are NOT gonna like what happens to those trees when they get soaked in seawater. the children are brats she's dumping him lmao Good for her! This is perverse. "are you... the devil" It really is. Especially your grandparents' trees. -calmly- "that's enough :)" And all those slaves you went into debt to free. I mean hey, at least the debt will be gone too! "what do you mean, the fuck do I know about boatbuilding" That's something! "well then. we're all going to die!" "Oh, finally!" "haha, we're all going to die" Oh. Well, that answers that. this is.... surprisingly well done "No more, no less. I want lots of sickly, genetically doomed animals in this new world." Is this some kind of... antisemitic caricature Probably. "kind of making me feel inadequate" chicken strips! Still less self-centered and malevolent than Primus. Pffff Okay, so, chickens don't have... mammaries.  So is this some kind of weird roleplaying thing? Are the chickens furries?? He's summoned as many animals as he knows how to spell. Sorry, Xoloitzcuintli. this movine needs to slow the fuck down oh my god official favorite character I like how he spent valuable time illustrating each one. "I am SO going to this sex resort" She looks awfully happy for someone who just learned everyone she knows is going to die in a flood And the parents look awfully happy for people who just learned THEY'RE going to die in a flood they're going to spend the end times fragging I would. ...And did, come to think of it. Ayyyy. Her? Ahhh, a liar. I like him! I love her They're one another's beards for the sake of surviving the flood. And that's wonderful. True. Who made that chair. some of these animals are super uggo Wait, did both of those kangaroos have pouches? Hang on, were those--yeah, that They do! lesbians I support them The orangutans weren't the only ones to beat the system. Maybe they're pregnant That'd explain how come there's still kangaroos Ironically, if they got pregnant by different parents, they'd be the most genetically diverse species in the world. *partners Yes, exactly! "what was that last one 8)" ...Want to know a fun fact about kangaroos :) that they have multiple vaginas? ...Yes. that still fucks me up Their genitals are positioned in reverse? Oh, that. All this out of a patch of trees? They are PROUD of that model Y'know, you'd think that a LOT of other people would have survived.  There was more than one boat in the world at the time this is set Okay so what ARE the carnivores going to eat idk why they call her fat. she's got an ass that just don't quit and I think that lion;s a fool for choosing some other lioness But the other one has tiddies.  Lion tiddies. And a clever mouth, apparently. Where's the pig's partner? he is a bi disaster The male lion, I mean he is He'd be dead after that. But what ARE the predators going to eat There was a single, doddering old lion in the group. Maybe they're going to divide him up? Write up her report. "Write up my report" = "Legitimately weighing my choices between mating with you or a watery death." Harsh but fair. Ahhh, Perfect Storm-ing it. Well well well. "See, I'd rather room with that tiger" Hello! Hello! Hello, sorry I'm late--is this that weirdo Noah's Ark furry disaster?! It is! It IS Damn "hey do you guys hear music" ....Carrion. *Dear Unicron, are they feeding on the drowned corpses of the dead?* .... oh hey it's the vampires' plan from castlevania Oh hey, that's a possibility They bob right by and they just scoop them up. It makes as much sense as anything else Although, after forty days... reptile room Heheheheh those snakes just wanted to mlem!!!! hahahah "woah that is NOT the letter I got" okay well that explains how the carnivores arre geting fed FEESH Oh right I guess the carnivores are eating fish Fish aren't people! Considering they haven't broken out into an orgy, I'd say they're showing surprising restraint. a least he feels bad about it She has lipstick THATS THE SECOND TIME They... both have pouches. The good ship Bad Decisions in action The kangaroos got away with it. thats way more than two chickens though I guess to be fair eggs are necessary "THEN we can eat them" FISH AND EGGS YOU DUMB LASS this dude has the right idea What...w as that what is ANY of this Who even knows? Where's your *one* female? I like that he's buds with the pig trying to think of what a panlion would look like given ligers and tigons exist she's giving u the key to her vag I wonder where the male panther is https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/39/Leopon01.jpg Found some. oh cute! Huh. In this scene: shadows are rendered. I'm sorry is her name "panty" Panthy, I think, but that's still BAD How charming and necessary. Wow, what a necessary scene those jerks should be thankful the raccoons helped them out All that craftsmanship and you couldn't rig the piles and piles of excrement to dump neatly into the water? nah that'd be too easy Ease of cleanup and sticking it to your god at the same time. Bah I bet he's not even dead that's three Oh no, they kicked the ladder down.  How will he ever get out now he pinched a tiger's rear Does it even matter who steers, I mean none of them know where they're going "quick, smear this blood on your tits" lock him in the slammer oh so that's why it matters whether they can steer Where's he going to pause or rest? ... this is the worst haka I've ever seen doc I'm begging you to look up real hakas after this film to cleanse my eyes Will do. hahahah That was dark. "surrender, we can have a threesome" how convenient Already so many rabbits Monarchy or cannibalism.  The only two choices. "You're here even though you got to this point in your life without knowing fire does that!" "did that lion just look at me?" holy shit lmao It gets caught in a southwesterly breeze and the ship goes up in flames. hukkhhkhkjhjk well the polar bears will be fine! Right? well I guess it woulkdnt be a south american made film without a huge party at the end Uh They're.  Making her cage dance? I don't think they're making her do a thing LOL ALSO I'M SORRY WERE THE DONKEY AND DEER DOING IT IN THE CONGA LINE They've told her multiple times she's free to leave that cage. that was Well, then! look at that dummy thick jaguar That sure did happen That WAS. Let us be thankful it is over That certainly was a thing that happened. now for a much needed reprieve Peel off the tracksuits. I've seen some vids of the womens soccer team from NZ doing hakas and it's absolutely great Much better than the orangutan doing it. for sure Oh, good, she's sixteen Yikes Ewwwwwww I will be honest I thought this was going to be an LP a Planet Coaster thing It's exactly that, but you know...real. God "due to tax state regulation" ...oh, I bet that was LAX state regulation He's clearly someone who has any business demanding "the prettiest girl." [wasted] The advice in question" "Don't" Right? "We are smarter than everyone and that's why we're building the MURDERCOASTER" That one got to live. that kid's smart Apathetic Child is the smartest one in the video. Well that's not good jesus christ is that blood It is. They certainly did show those idiot mathematicians, physicists, and engineers. JESUS CHRIST Jesus Questions about the inspection process. Something special. "We all have something special to hold onto." Like a severed head. christ I'm gonna bump out for now. take caare all! Goodnight! Good night! Wait, did we watch the roller coaster one? I know I've seen THIS one... hmmmm Oh!  With the giant hole! The giant body trench? Yes! Glorious! In that case, I'm all out of light notes to end on. Suggestions? SNL What's That Name? We could just browse this channel a little bit and look for one we haven't seen! All the ones I've seen have been... fun. This, then we'll browse the channel. I'm for it. God Hahhahaha Ohhh boy Finish that thought God They all look good tbh. True, true. Fire.  I like it. Now I'm slightly nostalgic for Interface on Wheels. Do tell! Ohhhh I've forgotten everything about the game save that my city was called that. Just imagine driving through this place I will not. Well then. Drive into the Void. Hey, it makes sense, you can bet on the games. I'm curious to see how the fire's going to happen. I mean, they seem to be happening on their own just fine Lovely. Oh no!  The orphanage! It's Little Lamplight! Hey, I'm up for another if you are. same! Excellent! THIS is the one. Ha! Dear lord. It lives there now. This is like bizarro Ratatouille It's majestic. How else will the customers get their daily dose of broken glass? So ungrateful \o/ Yes.  Yessss. One more? Sure! Yes. And why wouldn't it be. I like how carefully they rendered the butt. Priorities. VERISIMILITUDE I've known medbay Eradicons that would if they could. Amazing. Oh Boy As a doctor, I can verify every single thing about this. I love it. I love their walk animations.  It's like they're on roller skates. It does! or those wheelieshoes Heelies! yes! those. 24/7 Are those bloodstains Oh yes. Uh oh! I like the blow dryer next to her bed. Amazing. The only note worth ending on, something terrible happening to Grace. You might even call it... a Grace note. ;) Terrible. Shame on you. I love it. It's what I'm here for! It is, in fact, your saving grace HAH! :D Although, frankly, I don't think ANYONE'S saving Grace. She had her chance to run. She sure did. Well--thanks for the stream!  It's been a great time, as usual. :) Thank YOU for gracing me with your presence! Ha! Good night! good night! Good night!