#man this list is so different from my top five favorite characters haha

[o0o0thorn0o0o]

Tagged by @zangetsusheart—thank you for the tag ^^

List 5 comfort characters, tag 5 people (I’m not sure if I have a comfort character per se, but I decided to list 5 characters that make me happy when I see them. This was still a toughie…):

Inoue Orihime (Bleach)

Shintani Hinata (Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!)

Onodera Kosaki (Nisekoi)

Takao (D-Frag!)

Tateyama Ayano (Kagerou Project/Mekakucity Actors)

I… think that looks right, haha.

Tagging (not 5, but still): @luna-loner, @cookieswithay, @elyonholic, + @ whoever else would like to (of course, no pressure!)

[spockandawe]

Hi.....if you don't mind me asking, what are your top 10 favorite books? And why? Sorry if you've answered this question before....

This is an interesting question, and a difficult one! Which is why I let it steep for a few days while I was in a bookbinding fugue, haha XD

I’m not sure I’ll be able to answer it, because my level of fondness is highly dependent on how recently I read a book/how many times I’ve reread it, with an optional nostalgia modifier if something made a huge impression in my youth. And when I’m picking favorites, as the number of potential [thing] expands, the more I end up dithering and fretting that I’m forgetting something HUGE as I choose. So rather than a selection of top ten, I’ll just run down through some of my favorites! I’ll split it as five cnovels (recent reads, current genre hyperfixation) and five more conventional english-language novel (realistically, probably more like series, unless a standalone book occurs to me), and I’m not going to rank the conventional novels.

SO. Regular novels first. There’s a heavy recently-read/frequently-reread element going on in here. 

The Imperial Radch trilogy, by Ann Leckie. Okay, I am a sucker for a nonhuman protagonist, which is going to pop up in at least two other entries. And I’m also a sucker for themes of what can be perceived about a person externally versus their internal world, and Breq delivers like WHOA. She has SO MUCH going on in her head, and even though we’re in there with her, she still hides lots of her emotions from us. And characters like Seivarden hit me in character development buttons that I’m a sucker for, and the whole idea of consciousness being split across multiple bodies is DELICIOUS to me. Also... love me a sentient spaceship. ‘The Ship Who X’ series by Anne McCaffrey isn’t going to make this list, but I also love it a lot. (also, a universe of ‘she’s made me realized how STARVED i was for that degree of representation in certain genres that i love a lot, but don’t often see myself in as often as i might like)

The Murderbot series, by Martha Wells. Another nonhuman, sometimes-human-passing protagonist! Another one processing MASSIVE trauma of a sort that I, the human reader, have to slow down a lot and try to comprehend from an extremely different life experience! I like that a lot, it really forces me to LINGER on the nature of what a character is feeling. And oh my god, Murderbot’s voice is one of my favorite pov voices of all time. And watching it work (or go hogwild on its own asdfdgd) is absolutely delightful. I love literally everything about this series, except what happened with Miki. Other than that? Flawless.

The Books Of The Raksura, by Martha Wells. Martha Wells is a DELIGHT, y’all. Also! Another heavily-traumatized, nonhuman protagonist! And this time, like... It’s a fantasy world with huge amounts of sentient species, and the protagonist grew up away from his people, who are basically a bunch of feral homesteaders (LOVE THAT), and is trying to figure out how to reintegrate into their societal structures as an adult. That desperate desire to belong and feeling of discomfort and not-fitting-in, and the connections he makes and the way he DOES find a way to fit... like if u crey every time. Also, as far as we’re shown, it’s a cheerfully bisexual, polyamorous society, and *grabby hands*

Discworld, by Terry Pratchett. God, what do I even say about this series. It was a PARADIGM SHIFT. It’s bitingly funny, and also just plain biting, and full of huge varieties of interesting stories, set in a fascinating world, with a series of protagonists who I love too much for words. Vimes! The witches! Moist!!! They’re all so WONDERFUL. I still haven’t read the last book in the series yet, because then it will be Over Forever, and I can’t deal. This one is heavily nostalgia-tinted, but also, I stand by it.

The Belgariad/Mallorean, by David Eddings. Okay. Also very nostalgia, and the choice I can justify the least. But these books CLICKED with me. I’m afraid to reread them, because I’ve been wallowing in queer fiction for so long I’m worried about what the compulsory heterosexuality will feel like, and I know both series are very... episodic, in a way that isn’t necessarily great literature. But I dunno! Feels good, man. It’s high fantasy with a magical system I like, segmented worldbuilding of a sort that isn’t necessarily WELL-MADE, but it’s like... comfortable and easy. And something about the style and the character voices just clicks with me. I have no idea how well these hold up in the present day, but I do love them, and I’ve been planning to reread at least The Redemption Of Althalus by the same author as a standalone before I commit to a 12-book rereading of this universe, but.... I like em XD

--

Cnovels! I think I can rank these, so let’s go for it.

Fifth favorite: The Disabled Tyrant’s Pet Palm Fish :B Look, it’s ridiculous. It’s a transmigration story where the lead enters this fictional universe in the body of a fish, where he is adopted by a prince who eventually falls in love with him, and YES IT IS TAGGED MPREG, BUT HOLD ON A MOMENT-- I don’t know! I came here to point and laugh, but I’m honestly having such a good time right now. It’s really cute! And sweet! The main character is delightful, and the love interest is that particular flavor of semi-socialized upper-class young man, where like, can he do court politics? yes. can he politely express his affections for the main character? uh....... less so. It’s a really fun read, and I felt very sincere emotions about this prince who is passionately, deeply in love with his pet fish!

Fourth favorite: Mmmmmm, Mo Dao Zu Shi, I think. I struggle here, because it is NOT an easy book to read or show to watch, but having consumed the story, I love it to PIECES. I know a big draw for me is the protagonist, specifically, and his relationships to the people around him. And the more I cared about him, the more I wound up caring about the people around him, who I’d kind of neglected before, if that makes sense? It’s a story that really rewards some good old pondering. I didn’t care that much about Lan Xichen, but then I started thinking about how Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji relate to Lan Xichen, and then oh no, I care SO MUCH about his emotions, and now I’m thinking more deeply about how Lan Xichen relates to Jin Guangyao and Nie Mingjue-- It does lose points in this ranking because it IS hard to get into, and I would struggle to keep everyone straight even more if I didn’t have the show visuals to lean on, but it is still story I enjoyed VERY much.

Third favorite: Erha, but I feel REALLY, REALLY BAD that I can’t fit Yuwu on this list too, and I just want to loop them together. It’s time travel fixit fic, but it’s the book! Yes????? I love this. I love the striking character growth we get to see, and the changing perception of the world as the main character relives through events he already experienced and sees things in a new light, and I adore how Mo Ran’s growing guilt goes hand in hand with his growing love. And Meatbun in general... like, my god. I haven’t read another author who’s able to yank me through emotional whiplash so hard and fast. She makes me hoot with laughter one moment and then burst into tears the next. It’s absolutely wild. I love mxtx, and I think svsss/tgcf are gentler entry points into the genre and deal with lighter themes, but meatbun is seriously an UNBELIEVABLE writer if you can deal with the darker topics she covers.

Second favorite: The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System :V Look, I love it. I just love it. I love, again, characters dealing with the aftereffects of old trauma, plus I do also love seeing NEW trauma piled on top of it. I love having a main character with emotional dysregulation issues who doesn’t necessarily make good decisions, but doesn’t just leave me thinking ‘jfc what an asshole’, and I think that’s a really hard balance for an author to strike, especially without us getting direct pov. I love themes of being wanted and insecurity about being wanted, which is Luo Binghe’s major, major damage. And this is my first transmigration story I ever read, and the contrast between a main character who read the novel telling us about what’s totally going to happen versus the ground shifting under his feet is INCREDIBLY delightful to me. I’ve read other transmigration stories I enjoyed, but none that got my attention quite as much as this one.

First favorite: Tian Guan Ci Fu ;u; It’s so good. It’s so well-made! It’s so LONG, and it meanders, but also, I would scream if anyone tried to trim anything out of it. I am here a lot for the ship, honestly, but I also find the plot themes VERY interesting. I am very much here for reading about characters trying to process old trauma that’s been dredged up by new events, and also very here for the themes about how characters either pass their traumas along to the next generation, or try to shield the next generation from taking the same kind of damage (see: mdzs). And I’m also very much into tempering stories about pain with like... memories of kindness, and small acts of kindness repaid with an outpouring of devotion (see: svsss). But the craftsmanship in this book is just... DIVINE. I’m always reluctant to start rereading this one, because I have a terrible time stopping. There’s nothing about this book that I don’t like.

[thelittleredheadedmusician]

I’ve been tagged by @klaineharmony and @wordshakerofgallifrey in one version of this and b @radioactivepigeons in another so I combined the 2 (there was one question difference lmao).

How many works do you have on Ao3? 

146 (and like many who have done this before me, a couple are drabble collections and such)

What's your total Ao3 word count? 

530,111 words which... wow.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? 

Oh dear GOD if I listed each individual comic series we’d be here all day. We’re gonna go with the five I know for sure off the top of my head w/ the 3 big subcategories for comics. 

DCU 

> Batman comics

> Teen Titans/Titans comics

> Young Justice cartoon

Newsies

Les Mis

Percy Jackson

Harry Potter

What are your top five fics by kudos?

All of these are older and Batfandom so I’m not even remotely surprised by this. 

Family Gatherings Dick wakes up to a text from Bruce asking that the whole family meet at the Manor that night, causing him to stress out all day.

No Judgement Damian crashes at Jason's apartment and has to explain to Jason why.

Nursing a Sick Bird Tim loses contact with his family when he gets sick for a week, causing Dick to come and check in on him.

Bat Kid Jam Sessions All of Bruce's kids play an instrument which gives Dick Grayson and Jason Todd an idea.

Annual Wayne Enterprises Take Your Kid to Work Day Bruce has Tim, Damian, and Dick all coming to WE for the day and he's a bit nervous over what kind of mess they might make.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not? 

I do! Though I see now there’s a bunch sitting there that I haven’t yet. I’ll get to them when I’ve got more spoons. I love interacting with people and knowing what they like about my stories and writing. It makes me really really happy. 

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don’t really write angst? I don’t think I write angst. I write a lot of ennui. So much ennui. And bittersweet endings. Donna Troy and the Outlaws may be the closest to an angsty ending cause they only get one resurrection out of a possible two? But again, it’s more bittersweet than anything. 

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve ever written?

DO I EVER. Yes. Yes I write crossovers. Mainly modern au newsies/les mis cause it just makes sense. The craziest one has to be from my main newsies/les mis series A crooked politician? Yeah but that ain't news no more where I dropped so many references in media, networking, and other things you don't learn in a lecture to Hairspray and Hamilton characters that I wrote the “shit show” of the four musicals being combined in a modern au that I alluded to (and I think I was encouraged if I remember correctly) and it’s called Cautionary Tale.

Have you ever received hate on a fic? 

Not so much hate as someone doing what was essentially a “well, actually” on the politics in one of my Crooked Politician fics. The moral of the story is character views and emotions and blatant optimism do not directly reflect that of the author and I did study political science and know my stuff. OH! And then there’s my crowning glory of a DIFFERENT Crooked Politician fic being quoted out of context in a New York Times article. That isn’t really hate but it was certainly something. 

Do you write smut? If so what kind? 

Haha. No. 

Have you ever had a fic stolen? 

Not that I know of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I welcome translations and podfics!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! @wordshakerofgallifrey and I cowrote Costs of Civil Disobedience as part of her Piano Man au and by that I mean were LITERALLY typing in the same doc at the same time. It was wild and amazing. From Across the Bar isn’t cowritten but is my companion to her fic Play Me A Memory. @radioactivepigeons were working on a leverage!newsies au but then we both got busy. 

What's your all time favorite ship? 

I? Don’t think I have one? Uh... Beatrice and Benedick from Much Ado About Nothing? Parker/Hardison/Eliot from Leverage are the ultimate ot3? I care very little about ships. If I like it, I like it. If it squicks me, it squicks me. If I don’t care, I don’t care. Sorry?

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? 

Oh the Batfam Ghostbusters au. The concept is still solid but I just don’t have the motivation or know where I would go with what stands. If anything I’d strip it for parts and write it new. 

What are your writing strengths?

I have been told my descriptions are really strong but personally I think that my character voices/dialogue is. Also my ability to write teenaged ennui. Any ennui. It’s a mood. 

What are your writing weaknesses? 

Grammar! I do weird shit with my sentence breaks and make run ons and just absolutely butcher punctuation. And balancing characters in ensembles. That’s hard. 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I’m going to quote @radioactivepigeons here cause I agree with it wholeheartedly and she puts it better than I possibly can rn: “I think there needs to be a narrative purpose. Like, is it building dramatic irony? Is someone being purposefully excluded from the conversation? Is there a characterization where the linguistic difference matters?“ If the answer is no then just note it’s being said in the other language. 

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for? 

Actually physically wrote a story out? Batman. I wrote a “patrol report” as Batgirl to my friend as though she were Robin in middle school as part of a christmas present. 

What's your favourite fic you've ever written? 

Oh this is hard. Uh glitter and gold is like my love of DC characters made manifest and is absurdly long but like there’s certainly scenes I like more than others. Three Card Draw might be my favorite? I love the vibes and the little world I made and using it to work out my own thoughts about gods and magic as a stepping stone for my original stuff. 

Since I think literally everyone I know in the newsies fandom has been tagged in this at some point I’m going to kick it towards the dc folks. Absolutely no pressure to do this. @audreycritter @oh-mother-of-darkness @sohotthateveryonedied @preciousthingsareprecious @whore4batfam

[villa-kulla]

Fic Writer Review

Tagged by @fontainebleau22, thanks for the tag, sorry for the delay!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

26 at the moment.

2. What’s your total AO3 wordcount?

722 309. I’d have thought it would be more considering how long some of mine seem to get, although looking at other people’s answers to this meme, I guess 26 isn’t really a huge number!

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

My first fic ever was a little Lord of the Rings experiment for an exchange thing. But my first proper dip into writing for a fandom would have been Breaking Bad, where I wrote for a couple of years before it felt like my ideas had run their course. Then there was a Kingsman fic, and then Mag7 where - similarly to BrBa - wrote feverishly for a couple years until it felt like the well had been plumbed. Oh yeah and then jumped into the Marvel fandom to drop one Marvel fic before immediately jumping back out lol.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

So the Marvel fic has officially just become my most kudoed fic, which is kind of hilarious considering it was a SUEZ! CANAL! FIC! But in my opinion, a good one lol. So yeah, it would be 1. The SamBucky Suez Canal fic, 2. The Kingsman soccer AU, 3. Desert Sand, 4. Chisolm’s 7, and 5. Blue Devils. That last one surprises me, but I guess it was an early one for the fandom, so I think it became an automatic read.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not

I do! It’s possible I’ve missed some here and there, but generally I try to get them all.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I don’t think any of them! While my fics definitely include angst, ideally it’s still in a fun way, or at minimum, bittersweet? I don’t generally want the last taste in a reader’s mouth to be angst. ALTHOUGH. I really really wanted to include an epilogue to the selkie fic that’s kind of angsty. Basically the story would end, but then many years later we’d see an old man get off a bus on the coastal road, carrying a suitcase. He’d be wearing a suit, clearly back from many years travelling. He’d walk to the coast, back over a hill where there’d once been a little fishing cottage, long since torn down. He’d walk down to the beach and into a little cove where he’d kneel by the water he knew better than anyone. Opening the suitcase he’d take out a box which he’d then empty into the ocean, ashes spreading across the water. He’d take out a folded bundle of cloth and wrap it around his shoulders. Then he’d dive into the water, disappearing into the waves, leaving nothing but an empty suitcase behind him, and a folded pile of clothes.

I loved that ending but I’m still not 100% sure if it was keeping in tone with the actual ending, so I left it out. Maybe one day I’ll go and add it as en extra chapter snippet.

7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don’t know if I’d call them ‘crossovers’ exactly, although I did stick Goody and Billy into a Some Like it Hot ‘jazz band on a train’ situation, and I also did a Breaking Bad one that used some elements of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Those feel more like ‘AUs’ though. I like situational crossovers, but I’ve never been super into fics where characters from different fandoms actually interact.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Thankfully not. The most off-putting comment I’ve gotten was someone who - despite being very complimentary - decided to make a full-on laundry list all the anachronisms in a chapter lmao, like what. Stuff like "interesting that this character used this expression when XYZ would only been invented 10 years later!” etc. I’m positive they didn’t realize how it came off, but still, that was kind of hilarious in its.....obliviousness lol. It was special.

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do. And I guess I’ve done the full spectrum of ‘fade to black’ to ‘describe every bead of sweat in pearlescent detail’. It really depends on what the fic calls for! I’ve done some I’m quite proud of tbh, but there are others I’d like to go back and have another stab at, just because they felt kinda cookie-cutter.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

There’ve been a couple! I can’t remember which ones specially, but I had some people asking to translate some Breaking Bad ones, and I think a Mag7 one too. I remember someone messaging to ask permission like “We love your fics in Russia!” and that was a very sweet and wild thing to hear.

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, I wrote one with @yoporkchopsandwiches! Our Victorian opium dens Breaking Bad AU lol. I was just thinking of that recently actually and remembering how fun it was to read what the other wrote! We plotted out most of it together, and then took turns writing chapters or scenes. But of course while writing you come up with other details or ideas, so we’d then present the new chapter to the other with all the new bits added. And it was so fun to read what the other came up with like ‘omg no way didn’t see that coming/good idea!’ and then picking up their idea from there. In that sense it was almost like improv but for writers.

13. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

That I’ve written? I think I’ve had the most fun with Goodnight/Billy, partly for the time period, partly for the dynamic, but mostly for the plausibility. While I really enjoyed writing BrBa, it felt more like it came from enthusiasm for the show, not the central ship lol. Don’t get me wrong, the chemistry and its potential was extremely fun to write in a fic setting, but I don’t find I actually shipped it while watching the show itself. Whereas it’s been nice with Mag7 to write for a ship that’s actually....more believable lol. 

14. What’s a wip that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Ugh I can’t beLIEVE I have an unfinished fic up on ao3 lol it haunts me. I was sure I was done with Goodnight/Billy, and then early quarantine last year I had a train robbers AU idea, so I posted a couple chapters. But I don’t think my heart was super in it, I was more just messing around with the idea. I don’t want to delete it, but I’m also not super motivated to finish it haha, but we’ll see what happens. But tbh I like the poem summary better than the fic itself:P

15. What are your writing strengths?

Plotting, keeping things moving, and making stories feel visual maybe? They’re almost all movies in my head anyways, so I think I have good instincts for ‘cinematic moments’.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

I think I’m a little lazy, and also ‘end-product oriented’. In some ways it’s helpful to picture the whole fic before you write it, but sometimes it results in some scenes feeling slightly slapdash because I’m just trying to get them out to move onto the next. Like ‘everyone did everything I wanted to in this scene? Great, next.’ I could stand to ‘stop and smell the roses’ more while I write, and actually see what else I can do to improve a scene.

(also if I use a word once it sticks in my head I end up using it like 5 other times in a scene and don’t notice lol, I need to stop that)

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

All for it! Depends how it’s done though. I personally find long scenes of dialogue where you have to constantly jump down to the author’s notes for the translations to be distracting. I like when it’s integrated more naturally where actual translations aren’t super important. Like in River Grit, Billy overhears this little exchange between Goodnight and his childhood nanny:

“Ah c’est vrai, mon petit Bonsoir! J’en peux pas le croire!” she cried out and laughed as she embraced Goody. Billy realized with a start that he actually recognized one of the words: ‘Bonsoir’. Goodnight. (insert brief flashback of Goody teaching him the nickname) / “Ma Serafine,” Goodnight said with a laugh. “C’est vrai que tu ne vieillis pas. Tu vas me rendre jaloux, heh?” / Billy had no idea what Goodnight was saying, but he sure as hell recognized Goodnight’s tone for flattery, and it was confirmed when the old woman laughed and smacked his arm.

What they’re actually saying is: “Oh it’s true, my little Goodnight! I can��t believe it!” / “My Serafine, it’s true you never age. You’re going to make me jealous”. But it doesn’t matter because this fic is from Billy’s POV so it’s about how he experiences the language around him, which is why I wouldn’t have included a translation for the reader. If you understand it then it’s a bonus, but the words themselves aren’t really the point! 

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

That lil Lord of the Rings fic.

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

Hmm for Mag7 I’ve always liked River Grit and love how it turned out. I also think Ashes feels very complete as a fic and I liked the flashback format. And while it’s not my favourite fic, in hindsight I’m impressed with the Kingsman football fic and how I had to write about 5 different soccer games and make them all feel different and exciting, and not just some variation of ‘He kicked the ball!’ I’m really pleased with how those sequences all turned out.

La fin! Not tagging anyone this time, but please feel free to do this if you see it! I love when people just take initiative to do these things without waiting for a tag (also please tag me in it if you do, ‘cause I love reading these things lol)

[bonesliketambourines]

top five of ‘20

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

thank you @xanthippe74 for the tag!

well! it’s been quite a year, hasn’t it? 

i hadn’t written fanfic at all since like 2012 prior to this year, and that was in a completely different fandom; when drarry grabs you, it grabs hard, eh? i wrote 51 fics this year and there’s still time for more 😬

picking my top five is hard! i already went a little too into my feelings about what are probably my automatic first choices here and here, so i’m going to exclude those from this list!

i always make the ‘i love all my children equally’ joke from arrested development about my fic, but for the most part i’m really telling the truth—i know not all my fics are incredible or excellent, but i put time and effort into all of them, and even the not as good ones are part of my journey as a writer, because i really feel i’ve improved by leaps and bounds this year. i’ve certainly gotten better at producing a quality fic at the eleventh hour, haha.

honestly though, there absolutely are some fics that are a little closer to my heart (besides the two mentioned in the links above), so i’m going to attempt to narrow that down into five!

in no particular order:

the best kind of bad: this was an expansion of a discord drabble, and is my first attempt at writing first-person, ever! it also was a bit of a tone shift from my previous efforts up to this point—a little darker, a little ambiguous, less focus on humor and snappy banter and more on making the atmosphere match the vibes i was going for. this was my first more ‘open ending’ fic that doesn’t answer all the questions it put forth, and i definitely have taken that and run with it in the intervening months!

push and pull you down: so i think by now everyone in the drarry fandom knows about this gifset, right? of course when a fest all about inspiration from gifs and images came out i had to use this one! i’ve always loved the idea of a totally unredeemed draco who isn’t trying to be nice and conform to post-war life, a draco who still uses his money and his name to get his way no matter what. and what better exemplifies that than drug-peddling and sex on potions? i also have a lot of thoughts about harry as an auror—i love writing him as confident and competent, of course, but equally do i enjoy writing him questioning himself and wondering if maybe this path isn’t for him after all. also, smoking is sexy and that’s that on that.

in knots: so, full disclosure; i didn’t like this one at all when i first wrote and posted it. it was kinktober and here i was writing a sad, strange little fic about PTSD and living up to our legacies and how our images of ourselves are based so much on our parents, and the adults in our lives, and the things we were told as children. what the fuck is that doing in the middle of all the relatively hot smut i wrote? but, up it went, and when i re-read it the next day, i completely changed my tune. it’s rough, sure—all of my kinktober things are as they’re not edited at all, but this one has probably more feelings per capita than almost anything else i’ve written, and it got right to the heart of a lot of the character motivations that i have in my head when i write these two, but don’t always articulate.

in His name: ahhhhh man. okay. so this one really, really got away from me as you can tell by the word count. i didn’t edit or revise any of my kinktober fics before posting them, but this one i spent a lot of time researching first, and i’m thrilled with how it came out. as someone who grew up watching buffy and had a long-time love affair with supernatural, writing something with sexy demonic possession has always been on my wish list, but it’s not exactly a common thing to work into the harry potter universe! i got to sprinkle this fic with all of my favorite tropes and i think i managed to maintain the intensity of the fic throughout the whole thing, even though it’s so dang long haha.

in charge: so anybody who’s read my writing knows that i have a pretty particular style of draco and harry that i write. even if i adjust their personalities, there are some core tenets that remain. i went a totally different route for them with this one, and i love how it turned out. forcing myself to step back and throw away everything i’m used to for characterization was so, so fun, and this dynamic and vibe is just so tasty that i may have to come back to it!

and yes, three of the five of these are from kinktober. i found that having to come up with new ideas every single day really stretched my writer muscles and forced me to go outside my comfort zone in so many ways; it was a challenge to not just write the same exact scenario with a cut-and-paste kink for the smut, but at the risk of sounding self-aggrandizing, i really think i achieved that, and i’m quite proud of everything i wrote that month. it made me a better writer and i highly recommend that everyone participate in something like this if they’re able!

and hey would you look at that—you’ll get the chance! i’m going to take this opportunity to link to @hpkinkuary, which will be a list of 28 kink prompts i’ll be posting in mid-january and hosting throughout the month of february! there will be an ao3 collection and some very pretty graphics that i’ve yet to make, and there are no rules or participation requirements, so if you feel like you might want to give it a shot go ahead and give that account a follow!

i’m tagging @tackytigerfic, @dracoladon, @shealwaysreads, @maesterchill, @p1013, @quicksilvermaid, @pineau-noir, @peachpety, and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it; make sure you tag me in it so i can see your replies!!

[lululawrence]

Annual Writing Self Evaluation

Thank you for the tag @louandhazaf!!! I’m honestly clutching my chest that you tagged me, so thank you xxx especially since i love this little self eval that i think @juliusschmidt came up with all those years ago and we just keep perpetuating it haha

this... is going to get long, though. since it asks me to list my works published this year and that is 24. so. here goes.

1. List of works published this year:

Swerve the Handshake (Nick/Louis)

Need So Much of You (Harry/Louis for @onedirectionbigbang)

You're A (Total) Distraction (girl!direction and hybrid Harry/Louis for @wallsficfest)

Always Keep You Next To Me (Greg/Louis for @wallsficfest)

With Your Hand In Mine (Nick/Louis for @wallsficfest)

Smells Like Omega Spirit (Harry/Louis for @1daboficfest)

If Only We Wish Hard Enough (Harry/Louis for @disneydirectionfest)

Political Pizza (Harry/Louis for @wordplayfics)

Talk the Night Through (Harry/Louis for @wordplayfics)

Wrinkles (Harry/Louis for @1000feelingsfics)

Would You Be My Girlfriend? (girl!direction Harry/Louis for @wordplayfics)

Lately You've Been On My Mind (Harry/Louis for @wordplayfics)

Don't Want It Any Other Way (Harry/Louis for @wordplayfics)

I'm Ready for the Worst (Greg/Louis for @louisandmenfest)

Loving You's the Antidote (Nick/Harry/Louis for @finelineficfest)

Do You Know Who You Are? (Harry/Louis for @finelineficfest)

Don't You Call Him (What You Used To Call Me) (Harry/Louis for @finelineficfest)

Gone Too Long (From You) (Harry/Louis co-written with @fallinglikethis for @finelineficfest)

Just Me and the Stars Can Get Lonely (Niall/Rory McIlroy for @heartbreakweatherficfest)

The Way You Bend the Rules (Niall/Rory McIlroy for @heartbreakweatherficfest)

And Then I Saw His Face (Harry/Louis for @1dtrickortreatfest)

I'mma Give You A Promotion (Nick/Louis)

What You Waiting For? (Nick/Harry for @1000feelingsfics)

(I'm Dreaming of a) One Night Inn (Harry/Louis, Zayn/Liam, Niall/Shawn)

2. Work you are most proud of (and why):

every time i think about this question i’ve got a different answer, to be honest. i do think my I Go Down Blazing, Feeling Like I'm Going Crazy series is probably what i’m most proud of, though. as soon as i knew @runaway-train-works was going to be hosting the heartbreak weather fic fest, i knew i wanted to write dear patience, but as the idea grew and grew and more ideas solidified and i realized what the story was turning into, i realized it was so much more than i originally thought and i needed a second song to help me fully get a solid grasp on it. in the end, it was a hard duo of fics to write, mainly because i honestly don’t know much of anything about golf, i was still trying to create fully the way soulmates worked in the world, and there’s just not all that much about rory online to find, so i was winging it haha but i’m so incredibly happy with the world i made and the fics i wrote, even if i don’t know that they’ll ever get to like 200 hits or whatever hahaha i love them.

3. Work you are least proud of (and why):

uhhhhh you know looking at this list of fics i have, i’m actually proud of every single one for some reason and i don’t know if there’s any of them that i’d even label as “least proud”.

4. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

i hate this question and forget that it is on this list every year lollll let me see if i can find something i really like. okay i found one, it’s from my long grouis haha and i’m apologizing now for it being so long. you can skip ahead to the next question if you like, but i’m just incredibly proud of the banter and the way i wrote this section, PLUS those damn joggers actually happened because he posted a photo of himself wearing them in the shops on instagram and that inspired this entire thing so. enjoy. (i’ve italicized it and indented it to hopefully make it easier to skip it’s so long i’m so sorry)

“It’s safe for you to come back in here,” Louis called out as he closed his computer. 

“Thank goodness, I was getting so exhausted of hiding in your bedroom and snooping through all your shit,” Greg said as he walked out wearing a sheet mask and a pair of grey joggers that did nothing to hide what he was packing. 

Louis smirked and wanted to say something, but Greg kept going. 

“Did you know you have like five different deodorants in there?”

Louis threw his arm on the back of his couch and nodded. 

“Why?” Greg asked, throwing himself down onto the couch and placing his stupidly long legs on top of Louis’. “Who legitimately needs five different deodorants? Do they have different uses or something? Some were even women’s deodorants, so I wasn’t sure if they were your sisters’ or what. Oh, and I helped myself to one of your fancy toners. It had rosewater in it or something.”

“Well, for the deodorants I just like trying different scents and I switch them up based on my mood. And actually, the one I use most often is a women’s deodorant. It works great. Plus I smell fresh and clean like baby powder all day.” Louis shrugged. “And that wasn’t my toner. Dunno who left it. Just showed up one day and no one says it’s theirs, so I kept it. It’s quite nice, isn’t it? Lotts said it’s supposed to help even out the PH balance of my skin or some shit, but I’ll be fucked if I know what that actually means.”

“Oh, that does sound fancy,” Greg agreed, checking the time on his phone. “I’ve got five more minutes on this mask, don’t let me forget. Don’t want to leave it on so long it burns my skin off or summat.”

“Sure,” Louis said, laughing. “So are you actually wearing anything under these or are you just that excited to see me?”

“Eh?” Greg asked before looking down at his crotch. Of course, now he was sitting down it didn’t show anything. “What are you on about?”

“Stand back up and look in a mirror, mate,” Louis said, laughing. “You’re dick was trying to tell me hello a minute ago.”

“I didn’t tell it to do that,” Greg muttered as he shifted so he could stand back up again. He walked into Louis’ bedroom, and Louis could hear when he’d seen himself. “Oh my God, that’s obscene! Does it always look like that when I wear these?”

Louis laughed and walked into his bedroom to see Greg’s eyes wide as he shifted himself around and walked a bit, appalled that no matter what he did, nothing seemed to make it any less there. 

“I wouldn’t know, I’ve never seen you in those. You usually nick a pair of mine,” Louis reminded him. “Do you wear them without pants often?”

“I never wear pants with these,” Greg said, rubbing his forehead. “Fuck, I’ve likely given that nan that lives below me too many looks at my cock without even realising it. They’re my softest, most favorite pair of joggers! I wear them to the shops when I’m too knackered to get fully dressed!”

As Greg continued to narrate the various escapades he’d had over the years in the joggers without even realising what he’d been doing, Louis settled onto his bed, propping himself up on his elbow so he could still watch Greg as he motioned about in distress.

When it was clear Greg wouldn’t be stopping anytime soon, Louis pulled out his phone and started filming. There was no one he could share this with, but it would be good for a laugh later on.

“Fuck, and you didn’t remind me to take off my mask!” Greg cried, rushing back into the bathroom to remove the sheet mask and do whatever else he had to do when he used them. 

Greg was proper obsessed with them, said they were relaxing and kept his skin soft. Louis just liked knowing they were one of Greg’s things, like taking regular baths with a bottle of wine and perusing various adoption websites for dogs he could possibly give a good home to.

“Sorry, love,” Louis said, as Greg walked back out of the bathroom. He really was sorry, but he also couldn’t pass up the opportunity to keep taking the piss. Greg was too much fun to rile up. “Was distracted by your big dick flopping about whilst you remembered all the good times you’d had in the joggers.”

5. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

i’ve had a few this year that told me they don’t usually read that pairing or they don’t usually comment on fics, but for various reasons they gave the pairing a try or wanted to comment because of something specific and those were particularly lovely. that said, every comment is so so great, they really do boost me up to see them and i need to do better with getting my anxiety in hand and responding to them regularly.

6. A time when writing was really, really hard:

this entire damn year, man. all of the time i’d carefully carved out for myself over the past few years to write was basically blown to shit with the pandemic, which also was so exhausting it didn’t leave me with much energy to write. but i still somehow posted 24 fics?? i dunno, dude. i think writing saved me and gave me something to look forward to, tbh.

7. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

most of my advent fic, tbh lollll a lot that was in there wasn’t really brainstormed ahead of time, it just happened, and i forgot some of the details even because i just flat out didn’t remember what i’d put in there, so i’m STILL surprised haha i love when fics happen like that

8. How did you grow as a writer this year:

i always think of challenges as fun and then i look back and wonder if i was insane because i thought it would be fun to try something new but it was mostly really fucking hard haha i wrote a lot of pairings and combinations of tropes this year that i never have before as well as stretching myself with writing emotions and situations i never have before, so i’m quite proud of myself for continuing to push the envelope and try new things like that.

9. How do you hope to grow next year:

i mostly hope that i’ll be able to carve more time out for myself as things HOPEFULLY settle down a bit more. i might not be as impulsive when it comes to choosing things to write at that point, but we’ll see. lol

10. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

i... hmm. there’s a lot of people i’m thinking of right now, but it’s hard to choose just one. i think actually there were two and they were @louandhazaf and @disgruntledkittenface. i very much admire both of them for their own writing and works, but i am particularly inspired by how many pairings they write and the variety of fics they have posted. it’s definitely because of them that i’ve tried writing a lot of the pairings that i have, and that’s before you even start to look at the help they’ve given me with betaing certain fics (usually rare pairs lollll). they’re just both so supportive and open to so many things, and i am so much more open to all sorts of things because of them. i CANNOT answer this without mentioning the Write Your Way Out GC either, though. Y’all are my crew in SO many ways and you let me rely on you in every way through this past year. it really does take a village, doesn’t it?

11. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

lmao i’m sure. but all i’m thinking of at the moment are the tumblr posts and canon compliant shit i based the fics on, so nothing off the top of my head apparently haha

12. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

hell if i know. maybe just... write for yourself. i think that’s why i’m so proud of every fic i wrote this year. i really was writing for me and if others like it too? bonus. 

13. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

my big bang!!! that’s the big one. i’m so excited for it. i have a whole list of other fics, too, though. hahaha i’m also super SUPER excited for both of my omega harry fics to post hehe 

14. Tag three writers whose answers you’d like to read.

@becomeawendybird @sadaveniren @londonfoginacup

*All answers should be about works published in 2020. Also, you can skip any questions you hate or don’t want to answer, but please leave them on the list so that others can do them if they want.

[vespiiqueen]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the ask box of the last 10 people who reblogged something from you (if you want !! 💛💖)

Wow I rambled a lot with this but i can't add cuts bc I'm on mobile rn DHSISHSJ sorry :"))))

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1. Ik Ik "haha how cringe are you" of me to say, but honestly? Homestuck. Homestuck helped me in a time of need and when i so desperately wanted something to latch onto. Finally, I caved into my friends telling me to read it-- and it's been a blast!! The epilogues / hs^2 make me feel kinda sad though, because so much of what I loved about the original was yeeted through the nine circles of hell and into the trash. I love Y/ffany's (I call her Yippi tho) design, the art is really pretty at times, Harry is a major dork, I LIVE for seeing Vrissy bc honestly?? Her design is 10/10, very early 2000s emo style and I also live for that. Tavros is cute and a nerd and I think that's swell!

But in terms of story and how any of this happens, it makes me sad to see it happen. If Vriska could return as Vrissy, why not OTHER beta trolls? Where's my Eridan fish man, writers?? Give me the boy or perish by my fury.

2. Also super "haha how cringe are you" but,,, murder cats (Warriors), esp the early 2005-2015 amvs and stuff. I remember watching Flightfootwarrior's "I Will Not Bow" Scourge amv for HOurs and having no clue what was happening, but all these edgy kitties were KITTIES! It's introduced me to a lot of music I still listen to to this very day (Imagine Dragons, Young/the entirety of Hollywood Undead, Breaking Benjamin). And yknow what?? This new arc is absolute chaos, but in the good way.

I'm an "OG Fan". I prefer the first arc, The Prophecies Begin, to almost any of the other arcs. I just could never get into the other arcs-- not to say I haven't read them, I HAVE and the Fire Scene was probably one of my favorite moments beside grumpy Jaypaw, god complex Lionblaze, and fear the gods Hollypaw. I thought the build-up for it was SUPER satisfying. Gray Wing is my baby and I fully embellish in the Gray Wing is Silverpelt theory.

This new arc is definitely something new for the universe. While I didn't read aVoS (but I may do that if i can find the files for it), and so I don't know the major events of it other than what I've seen M.A.P.'s (Multi-Animator Projects, for clarification,,, bc unfortunately that term is also something disgusting). There's fucking cat possession and all the Clans questioning their belief system, yo. Shit be on fire.

Also the Imposter is 100% Ashfur, that's canon now, yeah??? Also im sorry but fuck Root x Bristle that's the dumbest shit I have ever seen. Give me Root x Shadow or face the wrath of my dragon plushies.

RiverClan is my Clan and my gov assigned warrior name is Fireshell 🌟🌟

3. As much as I hate the author,,,,, Harry Potter. It's been a major part of my life for as long as I can remember. I can never really remember why, but I've always just loved it- the movies, the books, the extra little merch that would pop up in my local Walmart. Of course my favorite character is Draco Malfoy. I could go on and on and ON about how I think his character arc was SHIT and JKR didn't have the balls to make him a confident gay man that was always implied through the text (at least, my lesbian ass thought it was implied but i may just be projecting, idk). I could ramble about Draco for HOURS and what I think his character SHOULD have been and how his parents are horrible (more specifically, Lucius bc Narcissa [?] Actually showed a few good moments), and a child should never have to pay for their parents sins.

Oh noo, Draco's a villain because he's a victim of major abuse and peer pressure? He's a villain because a literal child can be horrible and they'll always always always stay as a horrible little fiend?? Fuck that. He's a child.

Unlike manchild grease pan Snape, who was a racist piece of shit and shouldn't have became a fucking school teacher but it's okay because he was ~~~in love~~~. No, fuck you, he was a creep. James Potter n Co may have been a little posh bitch to you, Snape, but that's no fucking excuse to continue to bluntly be a little cunt all the way into adulthood. You're an adult who flatly changed your PATRONUS to imitate Lily's. You have no excuse. And Harry went and named his child after you LIKE JESUS CHRIST, DID RON'S SISTER NOT HAVE A SAY IN THE NAMES TOO?????

I also fully adore the idea that Muggles can run into Hogwarts and their patronus can 100% be a made up, fantasy creature. Imagine you learn the patronus spell and suddenly fucking ARCEUS comes from your wand. Imagine learning the spell and CHTULU (i did not spell that right but im so tired) comes from your wand-- an entire ass fucking Lovecraftian, Eldrith horror is just the embodiment of you. What if it was a fucking Homestuck character like Vriska? How fucking METAL would that be?? Hskajssowjjsjs get on it fandom.

4. Hee hee very evident by my url but Pokemon is another major thing of mine. While vespiquen isn't my favorite (that title goes to Hydreigon), it is definitely up there!

I've ALWAYS enjoyed the idea of Pokemon. You run around, training up these fight monsters and collecting them. I remember playing my sister's Ruby version on her flip-up Gameboy. I couldn't even read but I ran around catching god only knows how many of the same pokemon wherever she was. Apparently, I had fought for hours in the same area and leveled her Blaziken up to lvl 50 something and left her lvl 30s in the dust LMAO.

I got my first game when it was Pearl/Diamond. It was Pearl, and it still holds a very fond place in my heart. I could barely read, I could barely write-- I had named my Turtwig something along the lines of "MmorpHy" and my player boy "ZbsibJ". Yes I remember the names slightly. I really didn't get far-- I barely got to the first gym but I was just so happy to play it.

I eventually lost the game, as a 5 year old would do, but I can still vividly remember what was happening when the game arrived. I had just came back from the dentist and was quite tired from fighting the dentist bc I was super scared. Mom suddenly handed me a box and said it was mine-- my overseas (at that time) dad had bought me Pearl and my sister Diamond, because I lost my shit about it when he visited one time.

Well, tdlr, I played it for about five minutes while struggling to stay awake against the loopy gas they made me take. I fell asleep listening to Twinleaf Town's soundtrack. Every time I play a rom of Pearl and I get to where the player's house fades in and I hear that first tune of the song, I get a huge smile on my face and cry-- as.. Weird as it sounds.

A few years later, I had gotten Pokemon Black bc I liked Reshiram on the cover. Now, this one I could actually READ when playing, but I don't remember a lot of things about it. I probably lost this one too, as a 8/9 year old would do. I DO remember, I chose Snivy and my sister chose Tepig (hrmm there's a theme here of grass/fire goin on......) and vibing to the music. I was so amazed by the sprites moving, I just kept getting into encounters to see the sprites move (oh boy, no one tell younger 7-9 y/o me about Zelda......oh wait....)

Playing Pokemon NOW, as a 17 year old """gifted""" chick, I stil have very fond memories. I recently beat Pokemon Black again and GOD the OTS SLAPS. I fucking adore the soundtrack-- the track that plays when you battle a trainer, the low health dings being turned into a legit song that also slaps, the battle! gym leader themes-- and oh my gOd, the legendary theme is amazing? It really tells you just how glorious these pokemon are supposed to be. It's not intimidating like Groudon/Kyroge/Rayquaza's themes. It's not action packed like Palkia/Dialga's is, it's not filled with tension like Giratina/Arceus's is-- but it radiates the GLORY that the beasts portray. And I live for that. (Also, Kyurem's version is my favorite because it glitches in the beginning and that's rly cool)

P/D/P and BW/BW2's stories, imo, are some of the greatest ones. Yeahhh, US/USUM's is cool and I haven't played XY nor SwSh-- but the ones I can find memorable are PDP and BW/BW2. I love N. I love Barry. They're my sons. Ghetsis is fucking terrifying, Cyrus needs a hug. Giratina scared the piss out of me when I was younger, which was NOT helped by Giratina and The Sky Warrior.

I think my favorite movies are the gen 4 ones. The Rise of Darkrai having a tear-jerking theme for such a mysterious pokemon (i still tear up when i hear Ocarion), Giratina being spiteful is a mood and Shaymin was cute, Arceus being angry is also a mood. Yeah, Pokemon 4Ever made me cry my eyes out over Celebi, Mewtwo Returns made me again cry because Mewtwo accepting who he is, I remember how vastly different the BW movies are-

I just. I have a lot of memories with the series, even if Gamefreak and Nintendo kinda do the series dirty a lot (your top-grossing thing and you made That monstrosity for the Switch? How dare you.). It's comforting to be stressed and pull up my roms for the games and to play them. Mystery Dungeon is incredibly fun to play, Pokemon Ranger is really fun with the concept (Shadows of Almia continues to kick my ass to this very day and FUCK the Jungle Relic, I hate the Water Challenge fucking gyarados bullshit). I remember the pokemon I got for MD (I got Time, my sis got Darkness) was Mudkip, if that is any help.

I love my little fictional pixel monsters.

5. Yup, someone told tiny 7-9 y/o me about console games. The legend of Zelda. My first Zelda game was Twilight Princess on the Wii and BOY did I play the fucking SHIT out of that game.

Honestly, looking back and looking at playthroughs now-- I still love TP. Twilight Princess is still one of my top favorite Zelda games-- yes, even after playing OoT, Majora's Mask, Wind Waker, Skyward Sword, the anniversary four swords edition for the DS where you could play by yourself (Nintendo pls bring that back, I don't have friends to play it with ;-;), Phantom Hourglass- ect.

Something about Twilight Princess grabbed me by the head and yeeted me into the world. I can remember playing it for hours with little to no breaks. I, a tiny 9 y/o, had gotten the hang of the controllers and managed to get past the tutorial quite easily. And then, I was launched into the game and I wasn't stopping for NOTHING. Mom and Dad would have to force me to save and get off to go and eat dinner. THAT sucked.

I had done everything on my own up until the first temple, the forest temple. Not where/when you saved the dumb kid, but when you were saving the spirit's light. Theeeeeeennn I got stuck on the fucking Forest Temple for deadass six months straight. I'd play for hours, running around in circles, unable to figure out where to go, and because I didn't grasp the temple's purpose of being that way- I'd get angry and get off. It wasn't until dad looked up a walkthrough and talked me through what I was supposed to do that I learned how to get through temples.

I had gotten to the last little fight with Ganondorf before the Wii broke and i could no longer play. Despite the Wii being broke and we got rid of it, I was ADAMANT on keeping the game, and I kept that game for YEARS. It was an original copy out of a sealed box, and I eventually lost it when I left it accidentally at my now ex-friend's house.

She had a Wii and I went "hey I have a Wii game!" And I brought my Zelda over. Worst fucking choice of my goddamn life. Mom called me to come home and said I couldn't sleep over like the original plan was, and that was it. My ex-friend stashed my Zelda and I never saw it again. And, even if I wanted to-- I couldn't get it back, which makes me upset. We had a BAD falling out. She likely doesn't even remember it's there, or sold it to the local game junkie kid who buys ALL games.

But I still love the game. Midna was amazing, and I loved how snarky she was and she has a very cute design! The game's OST is fucking phenomenal. Midna's Desperate Hour makes me cry bc goddamn it really sells how serious that situation is. I love Hyrule Field's theme in this game. I love the Twilight Realm's song. Zant was fucking hilariously scary. Ganondorf's design in this game scared the piss out of me when I was younger.

Midna and this game's Link and Zelda are def my favorites. Yeah yeah, Sheik is cool and all I Guess but dhsushwishs Midna holds the special place in my heart. She was totally my gay awakening BUT

For other game antagonists, I adore Ghirahim-- let's go you funky little queer-coded villain. Skull Kid was great, I love the entire dynamic of him. Prankster lost soul stumbles upon Majora's Mask and the mask makes him act out due to powers-- which, I actually took very heavy inspiration from for one of my OCs. The moon falling to Hyrule was a fucking terrifying looming threat.

But the game series holds a place, and I've yet to be able to play BoTW-- although, I'm fairly certain I'll like it. The playthroughs I've watched of it are all fairly decent! I just. Gotta save up enough money to buy it haha.

Dang guess I gotta go watch a Twilight Princess playthrough again.

Honorable Mentions:

Avatar: the Last Airbender, specifically Book 3

my OCs definitely make me happy, they're my children and I'd ramble A LOT longer if given the chance WHEEZE

My friends, but I didn't add them here bc it's more fictional stuff, I presume

Baking. I love to bake cupcakes.

Painting is fun. I'm an artist and goddammit im going to use painting as an excuse to make a mess.

Fire. I rly like fire, down to a pyromaniac level. However, i hate the fires that happened to my home town, the Great Smokey Fires of 2016-- THAT pissed me off. How dare you burn mountain landscapes to the ground. Perish.

History. I'm a history nerd.

I'm also a science nerd.

But fuck math, I cannot comprehend math to save my life.

For some reason, I rly like learning how the human body works??? like did you know, organs are actually sticky when touched by a bare hand?? Did you?? How fucking cool is that.

Bakugan. I love Bakugan, esp the DS game. I love my Darkus Leonidas. Give me back the online world, you peasants-- I want my Darkus Dragonoid. (Also fuck all my friends from when I was in kindergarten- my theory that Alice was Masquerade was somewhat correct.)

[vuure]

Embrace your past and get to know your friends’ fandom origins!

Rules: Post gifs of your fandoms / ships starting with your most current hyperfixation and work backwards. (Bonus points if you share any stories about how or when you got into that ship! But not necessary!!) Then tag anyone whose fandom history you’d like to learn about!

 @ilackallhonour​ has tagged me in this, and usually I’m really bad at actually joining in, but this one really got me thinking back on all my old fandoms and hyperfixations. I didn’t really do shipping until a few years ago, might have something to do with my recently discovered ace-ness :’)

I always had fantasies that I was part of the world of that particular hyperfixation at time. Of course very heroic and awesome, and very close to my favorite character. Alas, real life is disappointing in that regard.

Merlin/Arthur, I never watched the show when it first came out. Mostly because I can be a bit stubborn and when a lot of people keep telling me that I should totally watch something because I will love it, I refuse to watch it. Don’t know why I’m like that. Turned out, I totally did love it, and binged it like crazy. Also shipped Arthur/Merlin like crazy. Was really disappointed in the ending, and thus, turned to fic. For me, when I’m really obsessed with a show or book I just cannot let go and will read fic until eventually my fixation dies out.

The Umbrella Academy, I don’t really ship anyone, except maybe bromances, and their sibling relationships (Five and Vanya <3 Klaus and Diego <3<3). Man, I love this show, I binged it when it first came out, immediately watched again, got other people to watch it, and watched it again so I could talk to them about it some more. Of course turned to fic, but got a bit eww-ed out, because there was a lot of shipping going on and I didn’t dig it (too each their own, though).

Black Sails, uuuugh I can’t with this show. @Ilackallhonour actually got me curious about it because all the stuff she posted and reblogged. And damn, was it a life changer. I’ve always had a bit of a weird obsession with ships and that time period, but more from Dutch, and VOC perspective. Still, the setting immediately hooked me in, but I really stayed for the story, the characters…Silver. Oh damn. And Silver/Flint, oh double damn.

Sterek. Really, I can’t even say I liked Teen Wolf that much, although I did enjoy the first few seasons. But I stayed for every glimpse of Sterek I could catch. The first time Derek shoved Stiles into the wall I was screaming at my TV, NO WAY there are no people shipping that. Dude, that’s so canon it hurts! But well, the show turned into a big dumpster fire, and I found the online fandom. Got an AO3 account just so I could bookmark and comment and give out kudos so my favorite Sterek fic. And there are tons of fics. I can admit it, I was an addict. I can’t go on AO3 without drowning back in fandom hell, so I keep off it. Really, it was a problem. I was reading fic ALLLL the time. When I should’ve been working, sleeping, socializing, etc. Followed so many Sterek blogs on Tumblr, but wanted my sanity back so unfollowed them all. Sorry @andavs​, I still love your blog, and your art, and your fics sooooo much, but it was too big of a problem *sigh*

Harry Potter, of course. My favorite character was Fred, and got very upset when people tried to convince me he was exactly the same as George. NO HE ISN’T! He’s the idea guy!! Lol. It’s been a while since I’ve read the books, and not sure how much of that is true anymore. Back then I didn’t really do shipping, but now I’m a Drarry shipper, haha. The fics are just so goooood.

Gilmore Girls, duuuude. This show shaped my life. Every time I’m one a re-watch I’m like…oh thát’s where I got that from! I copied character traits and sense of humor and stuff into my own personality. Didn’t like the new episodes much, but that won’t destroy my love for the Gilmores.

Veronica Mars, same as with Gilmore Girls really. Huge impact on my life. Love the snarkiness, and yeah did have some ships in there. Actually did like the new season (though I hated the movie), but they did LoVe dirty man.

I should put Supernatural in this list too, although I feel like I abandoned the show and am not a true fan. I was obsessed with it for so long though. Those first seasons were so great, I loved the relationship between Dean and Sam (in a platonic, totally brotherly way because I do not like incest-y things) and the normal everyday hunting things part of the show. But than all the demons and angels en Gods came and I got a bit tired of the endless cycle of dying and being brought back to life, evil turned to good turned to evil turned to good thing. I’m of the opinion that shows should have an end. Just like three or four seasons, tops. Just finish it with a good, solid ending. Don’t drag it along until it dies an ugly death.

And now unto some total different things, that shaped my childhood. Hard to find a GIF for these books, but what is fandom without some cool art ^_^

 Tomorrow when the war began, by John Marsden. I was obsessed with these books, and read them over and over again, even now I’m not tired of them and could get lost in them before I finished the first page.

Wheel of Time, Robert Jordan. This series really got me into the fantasy genre back then. I had no idea of any of the fantasy cliché’s, or Arthur legends yet, so I wasn’t tired yet of all the same old tropes. I find it a lot harder now to read them, but back then I saved money to be able to buy them as soon as a new one came out, and re-read the entire series up till that point before I read the new one.

Cats the (broadway) musical. Me and my little sister watched the movie version of this show over and over again, every time focused on a different cat. We knew all the lyrics, we knew all the cats. We knew every little thing there was of them to know. We named our black cat (we ..I demanded a black cat) Misty, for Mistyfollees (she’s a girl you see, so we couldn’t name her Mistofollees). I even wrote some fic for it, haha.

(note: I tried really hard to find another GIF but there’s none) Elfquest, oooh Elfquest. This was my truest and biggest obsession, I think. I created my own elf characters, joined online RPG forums to write stories about our own characters, met up with other fans, dressed like a favorite character. A lot of the friends I have now, I met at those forums. I’m still low-key trying to collect the better-looking English paperbacks of the series, but am in no hurry to finish it, and don’t really read them anymore anyway. And my ship? Skywise/anyone, haha. I love Skywise so damn much. And his and Cutter’s relationship is everything (who’s Leetah? Fuck Leetah).

Tagging @stormnyk​ @andavs​  (I tagged you already anyway, sorry ;p) @imperfectimpostor96​

[twinkletoes-rp]

6, 7, 19, 20, 30, 31, 32, 39, 40, 41, 43, 44, 45, 51 (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Fanfiction Questions meme

6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.

Oh, geez... I’ve been involved in so many fandoms, LOL. I don’t really know if I can/should name them all. I’ll give you the ones (ONLY OTPs - doesn’t mean I don’t ship other things, too) I can think of off the top of my head.

Kiba/Hinata (Naruto), Fakir/Ahiru (Princess Tutu), Stiles/Derek (Teen Wolf), Kirito/Lisbeth (Sword Art Online), Harry/Hermione (Harry Potter), Goku/Bulma (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Botan (Yu Yu Hakusho), Todoroki/Izuku (BNHA), (better!)Bakugo/Uraraka (BNHA), Toph/Aang (ATLA), and Adrien/Marinette (Miraculous Ladybug)!

7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.

(This isn’t meant to be hate on the ships I name! I just don’t ship them, that’s all! Ship and let ship! ;))

Naruto/Sasuke (Naruto), Kirito/Asuna (Sword Art Online), Ron/Hermione (Harry Potter), Harry/Ginny (Harry Potter), Goku/Chichi (Dragon Ball), Yusuke/Keiko (Yu Yu Hakusho), Bakugo/Izuku (BNHA), and Aang/Katara (ATLA).

19. Is there a ship (in your current fandom) which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?

I’m not sure I have a ‘current fandom’ since I live for, like, everything at once, but maybe technically Naruto would be it?

In that case (again, no offense to anyone - and removing the ‘I wish I could get behind’ part ‘cause I do not), NaruSasu. I just...don’t get it? At all? Maybe it’s the ‘what could have been’s or whatever, but when you just take the series at face value, that relationship is...really icky, at least to me, and that’s putting it lightly. It’s so damn unhealthy, especially for poor Naruto. They were never even friends, Sasuke always treated him like shit, and yet...?! *throws hands at half+ of OG series and virtually all of Shippuden* IDK, man. Something’s weird there, and I don’t like it. Can’t support that. Naruto deserves better, damn it. (*casually links her Naruto AU fic where he DOES get better (in more ways than one), TYVM*)

20. Any ships (in your current fandom) which you surprised yourself by liking?

Going with Naruto again, so. Hmm... I guess maybe Kankuro/Tenten? I didn’t even know that was a ship until a friend showed me a really good fic, and I was hooked! lol.

Another might be KakaObi, but only in AUs where Obito survives the cave in and gets out with Kakashi and Rin and recovers, continuing to be the sweetheart he is instead of the ass he turned out to be in canon. Because he, too, deserved better, damn it!

Another is one I might have made up, not sure (mostly in the context of my Naruto AU, NGL), lol: Karin/Shikamaru! It makes sense and there are lots of compelling reasons when you break it down! You know, 'cause Shikamaru would need (or probs at least prefer) someone on his smarts level, and she's a genius, too, just in a different way. And once she mellows out, Karin's really cool, and (in my AU) she grows to eventually adore Naruto (actually fights to defend/protect him in the Pein arc!), and anyone who loves Naruto is good in Shikamaru's book! lol. Plus, she can tell him when he has his genius brain twisted in too many directions, tell him he's being an idiot and help him figure things out in her different way. lol. IDK, I like it!

30. What inspires you to write?

I just...love writing?? I’ve wanted to be an author since I was 8-9 years old, started writing when I was 11, and I’ve been writing ever since! I’m 27 now! I’ve had a few dry spells, ofc, but I always end up coming back! I just feel like writing is in my blood (partly because, I like to joke, my last name is the title of one of Shakespeare’s plays, haha)!

Pretty much anything can inspire me to write, though. I’ll see a pretty flower and be like “OOH, that flower could feature perfectly in this chapter in this way!” and then write 1k about that! lol. Or I could read a review of one of my new chapters and end up thinking of something I’d never considered before and then write almost 3k on that alone (looking at you, middle section of Ch 6 of my Naruto AU, lol)!

Basically, if it sparks joy, I’m gonna write something! X’D

31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?

Nicest?? Hmm... I mean, I’ve had a lot of things said about my writing... Not sure I can really narrow it down? lol.

I guess the nicest things I’ve ever been told are when I make people cry (espec multiple times!) and actually feel the emotions the characters are feeling, that the characters and their development feel so real that it’s like they’re real people instead of fictional/they’re written so much better than the creator himself wrote them. (Been getting those a lot on my Naruto AU, actually. lol.)

32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?

I tend to prefer silence while I write, but sometimes, my house is loud and people keep breaking my concentration (house of 5, lots of animals, not the quietest, lol), I sometimes listen to music. I usually prefer instrumental, and then usually Naruto or Wolf’s Rain (sometimes Princess Tutu, too) instrumental tracks. The Naruto one I like best also has rain sounds mixed in, which is great because I love the sound of rain! Woo! (Here’s a link to that one if anyone else wants in on this! ;))

39. What is your greatest strength as a writer?

Emotions and getting into the nitty-gritty stuff therein. As an extremely visual, emotional writer, I’ve always been able to feel the emotions of the characters pretty much exactly how they’re feeling it in the moment and then put it on paper. I also make people cry a lot with my writing and get them to feel what the characters do, so that’s awesome! It’s always my goal to get my readers to feel things because then I feel like they’ve really connected with the story and characters I’ve written!

40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?

Transitions are dicks. Sometimes I struggle ‘cause it’s been, like, two seconds or five hours, and I don’t know how to show that, lol. If I can, espec with the last one, I just fade to black. lol.

Also, sometimes I feel like I use the same sentence structure a lot, mostly the ‘..., but...’ format (at least lately). It’s really annoying, and I worry my readers notice and get annoyed/think I suck because of it. lol.

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

“All the ways I say ‘I love you’” by Leonardo_Charles_BlueWood_21 (Fandom: Ninjago)

“Paradise Lost” by AnchoredTether (Fandom: Voltron Legendary Defender (Zootopia-esque dark AU))

“where my armor ends” by dalniente (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power)

“of cats and curses” by faerialchemist (Fandom: She-Ra Princesses of Power x Fruits Basket crossover)

“Mischief is its Own Reward” by dalniente (Fandom: Megamind)

43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?

I don’t really read Naruto fanfic too much anymore, so like...I guess, technically, another main fandom of mine right now is Fruits Basket, so: without a doubt, @kyosohmastan ! They’re my absolute favorite Fruits Basket fanfic author! Everyone’s so in character, the writing is so sweet and feelsy, steamy when it needs to be, and I really love the writing itself - it’s just so well done and beautiful and I die happily when they post a new fic or chapter? Ahhh! Plus, they’re just so nice and talented in so many ways, we have the same opinions on certain things (like Kakeru Manabe is Too Much(TM) for us, haha, no offense to those who like him! lol.), and I just really, really feel blessed to know and read their fics! Love them so! <3

44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?

I’m not sure which ship this is talking about? Hmm... But a ship I definitely think (have always thought) needs more attention is Kirito/Lisbeth from Sword Art Online! It’s so slept on, and that is a damn fucking shame because they’re so healthy and sweet and have so much more amazing potential than they’re given credit for (way freaking more than the actual canon couple, just sayin’, no offense to anyone who likes the pairing)! I have written a good few metas (and a fanfic) on the subject (some/most of which are on my Lisbeth RP blog, actually, lol)! If anyone wants to discuss/RP/anything involving this ship, please let me know! Would love it!

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?

I’m not sure I have a favorite fic. But one that I always come back to (all of her (mostly G1) My Little Pony fics, actually - first found them when I was, like, 12, and have kept rereading over and over through the years, haha) is A Mother in Her Eyes by LoveLikeElena on FFN. It takes place in the author’s own MLP universe, but I love said universe so much, and her takes on the characters are amazing and so sweet! I love her look at the serious subjects that follow the characters through her ongong MLP series! <3

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!

Fanfic readers have become really, really lazy. No one reviews anymore, maybe leave a kudos here and there if you’re lucky (I have a major love-hate (more hate) relationship with kudos...), and it’s so, so, so discouraging to us writers! I wish they knew how it felt, to be honest, espec the ones you know are reading, but just...don’t comment. It’s ridiculously disheartening to work so hard on something for days, weeks, even months or years on something, only to get basically nothing in return. It’s like posting into the void, and it sucks ass. It’s part of what made me quit writing for a good few years, actually, and I’m so sad to see that it’s still a thing. I comment on everything I read because I know how it feels and how much it hurt! It hurts like hell, especially because I remember how it used to be just 6-8 years ago when everyone commented! I desperately pray the fanfic/content consuming world fixes that really soon or we might lose some really amazing writers! Please, even an emoji or keyboard smash! I don’t care, I’ll take anything (and I know I’m not the only one)! <3

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

Fic author ask meme

haha so @veliseraptor​ tagged me literally months ago, as in so long ago I have no idea when it actually was, and I didn’t get all my answers typed up until...now. actually a lot of them were typed up a few months ago and then I finally finished this yesterday on the plane home. no, I don’t know why either

Author Name: 100indecisions on AO3

Fandoms You Write For: it's pretty much all Loki at the moment and has been for the last several years. I've written for other fandoms in the past and I have others on my WIP list, but yeah, it's like 95% Loki.

Where You Post: everything is on AO3, and I do mean "everything" because I get obsessive about that sort of thing. I do still have an FFN account under ladymoriel and most of my fics are reposted there, although none of my most recent fics are because I haven't gotten around to digging up cover images for them. also FFN sucks but I crave attention/validation and there are still some people who only use FFN, so I'll get around to it at some point.

Most Popular One-Shot: for some reason “the state of my head” has 1,157 kudos on AO3, so I guess it would be that one.

Most Popular Multi-Chapter Story: technically “the adventures of tiny Loki and Thor (and friends),” because it’s a multi-chapter fic (boy is it ever) and it has 1,020 kudos, but if we’re talking actual planned fic it would be “the kindness of strangers” at 623.

Favorite Story You Wrote: man, I don’t know. I’m partial to “I am a time bomb ticking away the hours to blow your world apart” because I like my headcanon and I think I structured it well, and “all this that is more than a wish is a memory” gets points for being the longest thing I’ve actually finished. but honestly I don’t know that I have a single favorite.

Story You Were Nervous to Post: haha well I'm sure there's been more than one, but if we're talking about the fic I was most nervous to post, I think that honor would go to my Grandthorki fic "I will kiss you till your breath is found," which is the most explicit AND most fucked-up fic I've written so far. I was nervous about...so many things with that one.

How Do You Pick Your Titles: probably 99% of them are song lyrics. sometimes I'll start with a specific song that's relevant to the fic itself in some way, but I also have a whole list of song lyrics that sound like good titles to me whether the rest of the song has anything to do with the subject of the fic. often I'll come up with a good lyric early in the process, just like "oh yeah I've had this hanging around in my list for ages and it works here"; otherwise, once I've finished or nearly finished a fic (or much earlier, actually, if I'm obsessing over an aspect of writing it that is...not actually writing, which happens a lot), if I still don't have a title I read through my whole list and make a much shorter list of titles that seem to fit this fic. if nothing from there seems just right, I’ll go hunting through my iTunes library and then Google for semi-relevant song lyrics. on occasion, though, the title comes first or otherwise shapes the direction of the fic, like with "I will kiss you till your breath is found"--I had a vague idea of what I might want to do, but it was very vague and I hadn't committed to it, and then I just happened to listen to some Sufjan Stevens and went "heyyyyy I know exactly what to do and it's terrible and I'm gonna do it, I have a title now, I have to do it"

Do You Outline: it depends on the fic. for long ones, at a minimum I'll write a bulleted list of plot points I need to hit, which often ends up being basically two or three pages of a zero draft that I then struggle to turn into actual prose...and then I often re-do the outline at least once or twice as I go along so I can compress it into something more useful that fits on one page and I can cross stuff out as I go. (if a list can’t fit on one page/view, there’s basically no way I can hold all of it in my head at once.) I often end up with shorter lists of scenes I still need to write and specific things to hit during revisions, too. for short fics it's not really necessary, although I often do still write up something similar if I've let it drag out over way too much time and I can't keep straight what I wanted to do with it. (don't be me.)

How Many of Your Stories are complete: welllll, as a rule I don't post WIPs because I know myself well enough to know that that way lies several different kinds of madness, so in general, my only completed fics are what's up on AO3, and everything there is complete. in practice that's not 100% true because I'm very bad at deadlines and I have a few different fics where I couldn't finish in time and I either posted the first chunk of the fic that still functioned as a self-contained story even if it wasn't the full story I'd planned to write, with the intention of properly finishing it later, or I did the same thing but worse because the part I posted was...not really a complete story. in my defense I've only done the latter a couple times, and in the case of "going down to nowhere" I really thought I'd be posting the rest soon because it was all written, it was just extremely rough, and for various reasons I still haven't gotten around to revising and posting the remaining 80% of the fic. (as far as the opposite issue goes, I have 0 finished fics that I haven't posted anywhere, because I'm too obsessive about being complete to do anything else. I think I do have one old, extremely short, very bad Lost fic on FFN that I never reposted to AO3 because I decided it sucked...and if we're being completely technical about it, I have some stories I wrote as a little kid that are technically fanfic because they featured licensed characters, but nobody wants to see those. all the other old stuff I haven't posted, including at least two Neopets fics, never got finished and that's the only reason I never posted them anywhere.)  

In-Progress: uhhhh. well, this made me realize my posted WIP list is out of date, not because I've finished anything on it but because I have MULTIPLE short fics that were supposed to be QUICK so I figured I didn't need to bother putting them on the list and then they weren't quick because I am so fucking bad at 1) sitting down and actually writing and 2) finishing anything. But yeah, basically what’s on there.

Coming Soon: fuck, I don’t know. Half the fics on my WIPs list are ones I thought I could crank out in one or two sittings, AND YET. But I’d like to finish the rest of my Whumptober fic soon, because that one really should be pretty easy...and I’d also like to finish the short little Endgame fix-it I thought of on my way out of the theater, where 2012!Loki hops universes and revives IW!Loki...and then there’s the even older IW/Endgame fix-it that’s basically just “everything is fine because I say so, let’s have a little recovery”, especially because I’m like 90% sure that one’s almost done but probably some of it needs typing up and then it all needs stitching together...oh, and finally getting around to finishing typing one of two notebooks reminded me that the other theoretically short fix-it where the Guardians pick up both Thor and Loki is also nearly done, I just need to finish typing it. so...one of those, probably.

Do You Accept Prompts: in theory, although I...don't think I get prompts often enough to know one way or another? plus my brain is The Worst, so my general reaction to actually getting a prompt is basically "that's interesting but I have never had an idea in my life, ever, and apparently I'm not starting now", with an added element of social anxiety or something because it's Somebody Else's Idea and that puts a mental block on my ability to develop it as my own idea. so...anyone's welcome to send me prompts, with the understanding that I might well never do anything with it and if I do, it might take literal years.

Upcoming Story You’re the Most Excited For: I also don’t know. I mean, in recently typing up some older stuff (like the one where the Grandmaster decides publicly executing Loki sounds like a fun idea, from which I posted a couple excerpts recently) I got excited about those again, which is a good reminder of why I want to stay on top of my typing, but I don’t know if I’m more excited for one specific fic than others.

Tag Five Fanfic Authors to Answer These Questions: I have no idea who might have answered this months ago so I’ll just say that if you read this post and you want to answer these questions, please consider yourself tagged. yes, that means you.

[blazehedgehog]

Say Blaze, you mentioned BotW being in your top five favorite games of all time. Care to share the full list with us? :P

Haha, man, somebody always wants these kinds of receipts. I’ll be honest with you, I don’t really like committing to numbered lists. I never really think of things in that way. It should be obvious if you’ve followed this blog for any length of time that if somebody asks me for my favorite thing, it’s rare that I can actually pick just one thing and I’ll usually list off a handful.

I mean, I’ll do lists, I have some list requests in my ask box that I never got around to answering, but I will do them eventually, it’s just I never think of them as a set in stone order. They’re always floating around to different spaces on the list, depending on when you ask me.

Without looking at anything else, I’d say my top five favorite games of all time would be…

Yoshi’s Island was a very formative game for me. Anyone who claims Yoshi’s Island wasn’t that great is immediately knocked down a few pegs of respect in my mind. The artwork in that game was transformative, nobody had ever tried those kinds of graphics in a game before, and Nintendo nailed it pretty much on their first try.

And then there’s the gameplay. A lot of games around this era were trying to figure out ways to evolve the 2D action game, when you think about games like Astal, Clockwork Knight, Pandemonium, etc. Most are awkward, with mechanics that don’t always make sense, or don’t feel good to use, but I think the mechanics in Yoshi are incredible. Throwing eggs is incredibly intuitive, and the small expansions like the flutter jump and butt stomp add a little more complexity without feeling overwhelming.

I’m also in love with the game’s boss fights. Some people like to complain that “oh, they’re just really big versions of normal enemies, and that’s lame” but they can go jump in a lake. I remember more of Yoshi’s Island’s boss fights by name than I do some entire games. They may be “just bigger versions of normal enemies” but that doesn’t mean you fight them in the same ways. Fighting your way out of Prince Froggy’s stomach, throwing enough eggs to strike Sluggy the Unshaven’s heart, orbiting the moon with Raphael Raven, each one is a puzzle to be solved and a technical showpiece for the system. Gosh, and who could forget pulling off the trick shot with Navel Piranha.

I only wish literally any Yoshi game to follow it was as good. Nintendo has built a legacy of black sheep Yoshi games in its wake, with the only real comparable game being Yoshi’s Wooly World, and even that isn’t anywhere near as creative or cool as Yoshi’s Island, because it’s stuck in that game’s shadow. All the other Yoshi games have been mediocre at best.

I’d probably put the original Half-Life on this list. Half-Life was a paradigm shift for the first-person shooter that really killed the idea of calling them “Doom Clones.” Levels? Scores? Hyper-machismo? Gone. You’re a nerd, saving other nerds. Even now, in 2019, the way this game tells story remains highly unique. Instead of sitting you down for cutscenes and extended dialog, Half-Life is a “show, don’t tell” kind of game, and it builds its mystery from that. You might understand that the crystal from the start of the game is the same crystals you see at the end of the game, but you don’t understand who keeps secretly watching you. It makes for a narrative that’s simple on the surface, but goes however deep as you want to get.

Gameplay-wise, Half-Life goes to great lengths to make its world feel dynamic and alive. There are no sacred invincible NPCs, Everybody and everything is just as fragile as you are (if not moreso), so a scientist buddy may wander in to the crossfire and get shot, and the rest of his friends may blame you for his murder and refuse to cooperate from that point onwards. And then, of course, are the tremendous military soldier encounters. People will go on about how they aren’t actually that smart under the hood, about how Valve lied about squad behavior or whatever, but they’re definitely well designed enough to feel smart. Again, Half-Life was one of the first FPS games to understand and nail the idea that you don’t have to work within Doom’s concepts. Enemies run around, take cover, and use specialized tactics in order to flush you out of hiding. It was lightyears beyond anything, and if you can get past the game’s dated graphics, it still holds up remarkably well.

And yes, if you didn’t pick up on it, I have been subtly crapping on Half-Life 2. It’s also a great game, but it turns in to a bummer once you really stop and think about what Half-Life 2 does differently and what they ended up getting rid of in favor of a slightly more traditional narrative.

Maybe it’s just because I’ve been in that mood lately, but I’d probably put Mega Man X on this list. There’s not much I can say about this game that isn’t demonstrated better in Egoraptor’s now-legendary Sequelitis video, but the short of it for me is that I don’t love most Mega Man games. They’re fine, I don’t really have any problems with them, but they aren’t for me.

Mega Man X is the only Mega Man game I’ve finished without cheating. It’s just such a brilliantly designed game, and so, so tightly designed. Everything props everything else up, and it lacks the pure frustration and memorization of, like, the vanishing block puzzles of Classic Mega Man.

One of my favorite parts about this game that isn’t mentioned in Egoraptor’s video and didn’t really carry forward through future Mega Man X games is the fact that all of the levels in X1 are literally connected to each other. Actions in one stage have consequences in another. Defeating Chill Penguin freezes Flame Mammoth’s lava. Storm Eagle’s airship crashes in to Spark Mandrill’s power plant. Bosses don’t just have weaknesses, their levels do, too.

The most common complaint I see people relay about Castlevania: Symphony of the Night is that it’s “too easy.” My response is… yeah? And?? A game’s value is not always judged on how difficult it is; plenty of people would tell you that Kirby games are too easy, too, but Kirby is a beloved franchise with legions of fans. It’s okay that Symphony of the Night is kind of easy.

Especially given, that, I feel, the entire point of gaining experience points and powering up your character is to reach that point where you go from chump to champ. What use is gaining strength if you don’t eventually feel strong? Symphony is not a failure in this regard, and exploring the castle and solving its secrets provide enough of a hook even after you start to feel untouchable. And, speaking as somebody who nearly ripped his own hair out with frustration over Castlevania III, being given the ability to style on these creatures is more than welcome.

But what I really, truly love about Symphony is just how much of a love letter it is to the Castlevania franchise and just horror in general. The Castlevania Dungeon has a terrific page that breaks down the hundreds of references the game makes to classical literature, history, mythology, and film. Somebody on that development team REALLY did their homework. There’s so much of that in this game that I feel like I learn something new every time I play it.

It’s also the other half of the term “Metroidvania,” so, y’know. Important™

I know Breath of the Wild would be in this five, but here’s a fifth game anyway: Super Mario 64. I will never shut up about Super Mario 64.

To reiterate: This is the game that invented analog movement. If you’ve played Assassin’s Creed, or Grand Theft Auto, or Dark Souls, or Devil May Cry, you can trace the deepest, raw, fundamental core back to ideas first introduced in Super Mario 64.

And if you ask me, the game still holds up. The camera control could use some work, I guess, but Mario is still just as fun to control today as he was all the way back in 1996. In fact, depending on who you ask, he’s more fun to control in Mario 64, because later 3D Mario games simplified his move set under the assumption he was too complex in this game. But maybe you’re like me, and think that complexity is good. (I wouldn’t even call it complex, it’s more just… robust)

If you want to see a longer list of games I think are my favorites, this GiantBomb list I wrote is still kept somewhat up to date. (And contains a lot more modern games, if you thought these were all too retro)

[natsuki-oz]

Can’t even ask me one bloody question? Suffer by doing all 100.

1. What’s your philosophy in life? Make the people you love happy and care for them.

2. What’s the one thing you would like to change about yourself? I’d like to get a little less possessive about people.

3. Are you religious or spiritual? None of them.

4. Do you consider yourself an introvert or an extrovert? A little bit of both.

5. Which parent are you closer to and why? I was closer to my mother. Why? Because she loved me.

6. What was the best phase in your life? The bandtimes.

7. What was the worst phase in your life? Losing my mother.

8. Is what you’re doing now what you always wanted to do growing up? Not really but I grew up knowing there would be a time I would do it.

9. What makes you feel accomplished? Laying on the couch in the evening, looking at my happy son who cuddles against me and smile about life isn’t as bad as I sometimes think.

10. What’s your favorite book/movie of all time and why did it speak to you so much? movie: Gran Tourino - Because I like how people care for each other. book: too many.

11. What is a relationship deal breaker for you? Cheating, lying, hurting my son in any way.

12. Are you more into looks or brains? Brains.

13. Would you ever take back someone who cheated? Maybe. But rather no.

14. How do you feel about sharing your password with your partner? There are passwords that are too secret but it would be okay to share my password for the private phone and my private notebook. And the code to my apartment.

15. When do you think a person is ready for marriage? When they have been with their partner for a longer time or have gone through a tough time together and both trust each other.

16. What kind of parent do you think you will be? I am a loving father, wanting the best for my child. Sometimes a little bit too careful about him.

17. What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner? Wouldn’t be a problem since they’re both not here anymore. I’d have a problem with it if my mother wouldn’t like the person..

18. Who is that one person you can talk to about just anything? Maki, the girl who is my best friend since 5 years by now.

19. Do you usually stay friends with your exes? Usually not but I do have friends that are my exes.

20. Have you ever lost someone close to you? Yes.

21. If you are in a bad mood, do you prefer to be left alone or have someone to cheer you up? It’s up to why I am in a bad mood.

22. What’s an ideal weekend for you? There are different types of an ideal weekend.

23. What do you think of best friends of the opposite sex? Not a problem?

24. Do you judge a book by its cover? Yes but I like to be convinced of their true self by talking.

25. Are you confrontational? Usually not.

26. When was the last time you broke someone’s heart? Me? Never I think.

27. Would you relocate for love? I would but I am not able to.

28. Did you ever write a journal? No.

29. What are you most thankful for? My son and the times I’ve had with my band.

30. Do you believe in second chances? Yes. But mostly they don’t work out.

31. What’s the one thing that people always misunderstand about you? That I am just someone to be fucked by.

32. What is your idea of a perfect vacation? No matter where, no matter what, just having fun together with the person I go on vacation with.

33. What did your past relationship teach you? That real love exists even if you don’t really fit together.

34. What are your thoughts on online dating or tinder? People that just want to fuck.

35. What’s on your bucket list this year? I don’t have one.

36. When have you felt your biggest adrenaline rush? Oh, I can’t tell here.

37. What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done and would you do it again? I can’t remember right now to be honest. But I guess so because I’m still alive even if I did it.

38. If a genie granted you 3 wishes right now, what would you wish for? All time safety for my son, finding love, no war.

39. What’s your biggest regret in life? Already answered.

40. What do you think about when you’re by yourself? That’s too private.

41. Does your job make you happy? Already answered.

42. What did you want to be when you were younger? Already answered at question 99.

43. Why did your last relationship end? ...we just had different plans of life.

45. What’s been your biggest mistake so far in life and what did you learn from it? Too private.

46. Where is your favorite place in the entire world to go? My bed.

47. What are your top five favorite movies? - GranTourino - The 5th wave - Zootopia - Secrets in the Hot Spring - Black Mirror series.

48. What are some of your favorite songs? OZ - Rain Delay, CELL - Jikogenkyu Paradox Royz - Higanbana, Portion Boys - Niin Kuin Ennenin

49. What qualities do you admire about your parents? Already answered.

50. How would you describe your best friend? Pure soul, beautiful woman.

51. What’s your favorite hobby to do alone? Singing.

52. What’s something you can’t go a day without doing? Taking a shower.

53. What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve done lately? I’m always spontaneous so I can’t really tell.

54. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever done for love? Hahaha. That’s a secret.

55. What’s your biggest pet peeve? People in advertising in TV that brush their teeth without toothpaste.

56. Why do you think you’re still single? Because I’m an idiot, maybe too pervy, maybe too caring, too tall, too old, too weird, too boring, too dangerous, ....

57. What accomplishment are you most proud of? Running the family business well.

58. What is one dream you have yet to accomplish? Raising my son to be a good man, finding someone to love and marry.

59. What is your greatest fear? Losing my son and my friends.

60. What are three things you value most about a person? Honesty, stupid jokes, caring for other people

61. Who are five people you are closest with? Maki, Kizasi, Takashi, Hiro, Mitsuki

62. What is the greatest struggle you’ve overcome? Talking normally to people

63. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? New Zealand

64. What’s the most exciting thing that’s happened this past year? Nothing special happened this year I think.

65. What’s your favorite beer? All Sapporo kinds.

66. What’s one thing that bothers you most about the world today? People fighting too much about nonsense

67. Who are you closer with your mom or your dad? Mother.

68. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be? Didn’t I answer this already? Being less possessive about people I like.

69. If you could change one thing about the world what would it be? No war.

70. Who was your favorite teacher and why? I just had one and he was ok.

71. What sport did you fall in love with? I like most kinds of sports but bedsports are the best, haha.

72. What is the weirdest thing about you? I cook and bake very well.

73. What was your longest relationship? My last one which lasted 2 years.

74. What would your best friend say is your best quality? Having a weird humour, caring for them.

75. Who is your favorite historical figure? I don’t have one because I haven’t met any of them.

76. What made you choose the college you went to? I didn’t choose it.

77. If you could tell your former self one thing right now what would it be? Never give up fighting.

78. What food could you not live without? Udon.

79. Dogs or Cats? Both.

80. What’s closest you’ve ever come to being arrested? Hahahaha.

81. What was your best birthday? The birthday I spent with Aggy.

82. What’s one thing you wish you knew how to do? Flirting.

83. Where’s one place you’d like to go that you haven’t been? New Zealand.

84. What was the last book you read? And when? Sleeping beauties by Stephen King, a year ago.

85. Where do you usually get your news? TV, newspapers.

86. What are some of your own personal goals in the next 5 years? Same as now.

87. What would you consider your greatest accomplishment so far? Raised my son well.

88. If you could get away with anything that you do? Everything that I am doing right now.

89. Who is your greatest hero? My mother.

90. What’s the greatest risk you’ve ever taken? My life to safe someone’s.

91. Why are we here? Because our spaceships crashed down to this world.

92. If heaven is real and you died tomorrow, would you get in? Not really.

93. Do you believe in fate? Yes

94. How do you think people see you? As an arrogant, pervy rich guy with a big D.

95. If you had the ability to erase something that you did in the past, what would it be? Saving my mother.

96. What song makes you unconditionally happy? Don’t stop me now by Queen

97. If you could have anybody else’s life, who’s would you take? I haven’t thought about this until now.

98. What fictional character do you most relate to? I don’t know..? (Maybe Jiwon Ahn from BJ Alex, lol. With a little bit of Myung-Dae.)

99. If I asked you at age 5 what you wanted to be when you grew up, what would you say? Already done!

100. What is your biggest irrational fear? Already done!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #206

“have you ever wished for death and prayed all night for your last breath?”

Do you always read the book before you see a movie based on a book? No. When you’re out with friends, do they ever encourage you to spend money you should be saving? 1.) I don't hang out w/ anyone now, 2.) but even when I did, they all knew I didn't make money. Is there anything you’re trying to save up money for? What? Perpetually tattoos, I want a PS4 super badly to play a novel of games I've been dying to play (SotC and Spyro trilogy remaster, I'm @ing you so hard), I need a car soon as I plan to at least try and get my license in the near future, I'd love to always have enough to immediately go to Sara's in case of an emergency, a trip to South Africa... but those are gonna take a good while to complete. I have my priorities straight for when I get a job. Have you ever watched a movie you didn’t really want to see just because a friend asked you to? Yeah. Did you end up liking the movie, anyway? There's been many cases of the above situation, so I'm sure in some instances I have. Heard any great songs for the first time lately? What songs? Hmmm, quite a number. "Radio" by Rammstein is great, and I love "bury a friend" and "bad guy" by Billie Eilish. What is your favorite urban legend? m o t h m a n and the joysey devil. Probably top two. GAH I love so many though????????????? Like Skinwalkers?????????????? And WENDIGOS????????? Have you seen all the cool shit?????????????? Do you remember the last nightmare you had? What was it? No, thankfully. Have you ever hopped on any bandwagons? HAHA. Freshman year, high school... I "liked" screamo or alternative-type bands I'd barely ever listened to or even enjoyed to fit in with the emos aldkjfalkwejr. Are you an elitist (even a little bit) when it comes to anything? What? Definitely not a complete one, but I can get pretty annoyed if in WoW we're in a heroic dungeon and people don't know the mechanics you should have already learned + read new ones that're right there in the goddamn journal laksdjfaoweir and then some people just totally ignore your advice and alskdjfwleiruwqoeif x2. Then again I've been that confused asshole in a couple raiding situations BUT LOOK they're harder and I had too much to catch up on okay. Still no excuse by WHATEVER. Have elitists on a fansite ever intimidated or talked down to you? I don't believe so. Is there anything you swear you will never do again? A few things with certainty. How late do you usually stay awake? I can literally go to bed as early as 7 to as late as 11 or rarely later. I do NOT have a schedule. Started months ago, and at first it frustrated and stressed me out quite a bit, but by now, I've just accepted it for me. Do you have pets? If so, how did you choose their names? Teddy: sister named him, but I'm sure it was the "cute as a teddy bear" type thing; Bentley: no clue; Roman: it sounded majestic, cats are majestic; Venus: pretty, and her coloration is similar to the planet; Kaiju: totally badass for an iguana that's gonna grow to be a big 'ole scaly boy; and Mitsu: I had a theme of giving my rats cutesy "M" names. Do you ever buy special treats for your pets? Occasionally. Is just being fond of something enough, or does it take more than that to be a ‘real fan’? Did a middle school student write this? If you're pretty fond of something, there you go, you're a fan. Sure, some are more intense, but that doesn't make the more casual ones not "real." What type of fabric is most comfortable for clothing? Idk, I don't pay attention. If you wear one – bras with or without a wire? Christ, without. If you wear one – are you able to find cute bras in your size? HA. No. It is RARE I'll find a cute one, and that's always only online. Make pretty ones for plus-sized women a normal find, jfc. Idk why, but I am very picky with bras. Like good fucking luck seeing me without a shirt, so like,,,, why do I bother????? What length do you like your shorts to be? UM you will NOT see me in SHORTS. Have you ever cut off jeans or other pants and made them into shorts? Perhaps Mom has when I was a kid? But I have no memory of this ever happening. Have you cut the sleeves out of T-shirts to make tank tops? I don't think so. Have you ever modified a piece of clothing and hated how it turned out? ^ What was the last disappointing movie you saw? Ah jeez, what's the last time I even watched one. Idk. What was the last disappointing book you read? And I haven't read a book in even longer. Is there anything you’re really excited about? JOB. OPPORTUNITIES. Do you ever watch compilation videos? Of what? Vines, like shit dude. I can go on massive binges. What was the last thing you rolled your eyes about? I don't recall. What would you consider the greatest song ever recorded? Why? Yeesh, that's a big thing to decide. I recently discovered "A Reason to Fight" by Disturbed though, and it is. Incredible. Just read the lyrics to refresh my mind, and yeah, goosebumps. Do you like Hellboy? If so, do you prefer the old movies or the new one? Never seen any. Favorite Disney character who isn’t royalty? Dory, probably. But man, there's too many to choose from. Last thing you purchased just for fun? *shrugs* Do you even like behind-the-scenes stuff or does it ruin the magic for you? IF I'm real into the product, I love that stuff!! I've seen like every little BTS Silent Hill thing there is, probably, multiple hours' worth. What is your favorite thing about Mac computers? They're small and lightweight. What is your favorite thing about PCs? They generally hold much more memory. What are some errands you need to run soon? I don't have "errands" yet. Have your parents ever tried to convince people there was something wrong with you, when their “diagnosis” wasn’t accurate? No. List 3 of your best memories, times you wish you could go back and repeat. In no order, just as they come to me: 1.) First hug with Sara when we met at the airport; 2.) THE LOOK ON SARA'S FACE when she saw me in her room on her birthday (probably fave memory of all time, actually); 3.) seeing meerkats for the first time at the zoo. Ohhhh or maybe the true realization I was happy without Jason. But idk, that was SUCH a gradual process where I didn't feel ecstasy in like one moment. What color was your high school graduation gown? Ew, it was this obnoxious red. The majority apparently voted for it, while I was on the navy team. Are your parents’ dreams for your life different than your own? Mom's pretty dead-set on me being a vet, but she doesn't try to push me into it or anything. I know she just wants happiness for me. I haven't got a clue about Dad. Have your dreams for your life changed? Of course. What are your dreams now? HAPPY, stable job that I thoroughly enjoy, well-off financially (I don't aim to be rich, just "safe," you could say), healthy marriage, own my own home, travel to a few places, did y'all think I was gonna forget "meet Mark???"... stuff like that. What was your dream as a child? It changed plenty of times, but my earliest goal was to be a paleontologist. Do you feel safe in your country? Sure, I guess. Safer than most places. If applicable, do you feel safe at your school? N/A Would you ever want to learn sign language? It'd be cool, sure, but it's not something I'm interested in pursuing. How many meals do you eat a day? 2-3. Sometimes just one "real" meal. Do you own any succulents? No. What color are your walls? A hideous puke green. Why. What color were the walls in the bedroom you grew up in? I don't remember at all. What was the last song you listened to on repeat? "Love Falls" by HELLYEAH. What is your favorite style (or styles) of dance? Modern. Have you ever performed a solo dance in front of a crowd? No. Have you ever sung a solo? No. Which insects are you afraid of? Most, really. Do you think it’s silly to be afraid of an insect, when it’s so tiny? It depends on the insect, of course. Even if I do know what it is and it's "safe," I'll still typically freak if it surprises me. When was the last time you had a deep conversation with someone? Hmmm. Sara, I believe? What are you waiting for? Jesus FUCKING Christ on a bike a job. What do you usually feel like doing the most at home? Stuff on the laptop. What grade were you in when you had your first crush? I don't remember... For "puppy dog love," I believe maybe the 4th grade, but I may be wrong. I'd say my first *real* crush was on a guy named Sebastian in my freshman year of high school. Shit man, did a lot go down my freshman year. I'm just reminiscing and crushes jumped between like five dudes 'til Jason won. At what age did you start experiencing sexual attraction, if any? Some time in middle school, I think? Like that's when I had my first bisexuality crisis: 6th or 7th grade. Have you ever split open a rock with a hammer, to see the glitter inside? No, but FUCK I WANNA. What type of tree do you see the most of where you live? There's a pine tree outside my window. Oh, and there's a pine tree in my back yard. Oh, what's that across the road? Woods of pine trees. Where do all birds in NC live? In pine trees. What does our air smell like? Pine trees. Where is your favorite place you’ve lived? My previous home as far as location; house itself, where I am now. It's got its issues, but it's cozy and a perfect size for just two people. What states have you lived in? Just 'ole North Carolina. Take me awaaaaaaaaaaaay- Do you wish you were someone else? Sometimes. What is your favorite thing about the month in which it is now? Literally just flowers. That's it. It. Everything else can suck a legion of dicks. Who were your best friends in high school? Hannia, Girt, Jason (if he counts), Alon, Maria... I had a few "best" ones. ^Are they still your best friends now? Girt is my closest thing to a "best friend" if you don't include my girlfriend. Do you live near the mountains? No, they're on the opposite end of the state. ;___; Do you live near a beach? We're like, two-ish hours away. What is your favorite beach that you’ve been to? Idk and idc, beaches aren't my thing. Do you collect seashells? Not seriously, but I'll keep a cool one if I find one. If you were to start a new collection, what would it be? If I was not ashamed of looking like a 23-y/o pre-teen in love with Just Bieber, I'd have more Markiplier merch than you'd fucking believe. (One of my biggest regrets in life was not buying the tasteful nudes calendar; I will eternally smite myself for being too embarrassed to have to explain why I would have that hanging above my bed rip.) If you had to pick one year and describe it as the best year of your life that you want to relive again, which year would it be? 2017 was fuckin litty titty. Is your world view the same as your parents’? In some ways with Mom, and I do know Dad and I differ on a few things. Well, if I learned more about his more political beliefs, I feel I'd probably disagree with most. What color are your glasses, if applicable? Black. Are you the person you thought you’d be when you were younger? No. Are you a confrontational person, or the peacekeeper? I'm a massive peacekeeper. I avoid confrontation like the PLAGUE. Do you like to read? Not nearly as much as I used to. Like all I ever read nowadays are RP posts as I obviously have to reply to them, but if they're long, it is common I procrastinate on reading it... ;_; Do you sleep too much or not enough? Probably too much, especially when I go to bed early. Although, I do wake up throughout the night and sometimes officially pretty early. Then some days I have a 1-2 hour nap, so that just adds to it. Who is your best friend? Sara. <3 How did you two meet? YouTube. How did you meet your current bf/gf? ^ How far away is your closest family member? Well I live with my mom, but she's at work atm. The last time you did something with BOTH of your parents was? BOY OH FUCKING BOY. My mom's the most bitter witch towards him, so even for family events, Dad usually only stops by to avoid creating a goddamn wreck, such as at birthday dinners. I think the last time they were in the same house was for my nephew's birthday half a year ago, I believe. What’s your favorite holiday? Halloween!!! Now that I have a niece and nephew who grasp the concept of Santa, Christmas is also really special to me. I don't want kids, but watching those sweethearts get so excited over their presents is magical. For me personally, the holiday has grown more and more about celebrating family, especially as we continue to branch out/go our own ways. So I guess I like the idea of Halloween better and would enjoy it more if I actually had something to do, but as far as joy goes, Christmas. Do you like pumpkin pie? I hate anything and everything pumpkin-flavored. The last time you went to the doctor, what were you there for? It was the see my psychiatrist. Do you take any medication regularly? Yeah. Is there any particular view you have on insane people? I see "insane" versus "sane" as far more of a gradient shift instead of a direct split; there're levels. I actually do legitimately think I at some juncture in the aftermath of the breakup qualified as slightly insane, yet I wasn't dangerous or entirely out of touch with reality. So if you tell me someone's actually insane, I'm going to fear them being the explosive, entirely unpredictable and loopy kind, but I know the person may be calm and somewhat stable on the outside, too. You gotta consider the severity. Do you believe in any conspiracies? 9/11 was orchestrated by the government and you cannot change my mind. I'm not totally sold on this one and lean more towards "nah" (I think), but the "we live in a simulation by a future civilization" is not that far-fetched at all if you actually look into it. It's very interesting, whether or not you're sold on it. Hell, Neil deGrasse Tyson firmly believes in it. Out of your friends, who is the funniest? Girt makes me laugh at the snap of his fingers, it seems. Anything you need to get rid of? I'm sure somewhere... Do you have any wasted talents? Animal knowledge and compassion, probably... I know I could make a fantastic rehabilitator for animals, among a plethora of other animal-related preservation and protection actions I could actively engage in. Well, I'm going back to school for zoology, but even now, I want to do more. There is a wildlife rehab place I may be able to volunteer at soon, tho! Mom's talking to a guy at work about me helping there. DAMN, livin a dream. Do you let the little things get to you? The issue could be as small as a single cell and it could still bother me. How often do you cry? Maybe once in a week, possibly longer. I don't know if you mean like really cry or just tear up/lightly cry. The latter is pretty common, but the other, not so much. Even if I want to cry, my jaw just entirely locks the hell up and I physically can't get it out. Is there anything you’re trying to prevent? I mean besides the common sense things everyone takes action to avoid, hm. I feel like there's so much, yet nothing is coming to me? Well, actually, it's usually a daily struggle to prevent at least one OCD cycle. When was the last time you were told you were cute? *shrug* When was the last time you were truly, completely happy with your life? It's been quite a while... At least over a year ago, when I began to get antsy with wanting a job and later going back to school. It just all started when I realized I was healed from the breakup and ready to move forward in life, but I wasn't. Do you miss the way things used to be between you and someone else? Multiple people. What colors has your hair been? Dirty blonde, brown, red, and purple. I've had red and purple highlights, and I naturally have blondish ones, too. I'm ready to dye it again, jfc. Most attempts are failures because my hair does NOT take color well whatsoever. It's only ever worked perfectly with the brand Splat, and my hair soaked in the dye for a LONG time before washing it out. Have you ever gotten burnt by a cigarette? No. Do you and your parents like any of the same bands/singers? We share interest in plenty of the same bands, Mom especially. Is there any food in your bedroom? What? No. Do you know anyone who has road rage? Who? MY LITTLE SISTER. Haven't seen the woman in three years, but I can promise you Jason's mom still has it to a legendary degree. How expensive is too expensive for a pair of shoes? I haven't looked for shoes in so long that I don't even know the average price. What kinds of cereal are in the cupboard? Honey Nut Cheerios, normal Cheerios I think, and we have a little bit of the chocolate chunk Special K cereal left over. It's got to be stale by now (it's not even closed fully); I need to remember to toss it. What’s the last thing you spent over $10 on? Ummm I'm not sure. Over $30? I think my tongue piercing was $40? Maybe even lower? Or slightly higher?? I don't remember. Do you know who lives three houses down from you? I think so. The one time I was locked out of my house in the snow with Teddy and I waited like a fucking hour until I broke down, absolutely freezing (I was in my pajamas, dude), and walked down the road to try and get help (I needed to call my mom, obviously, and I didn't have my phone), I believe it was the third neighbor who answered. Turned out being a retired deputy who was super intimidating yet kind at the same time; he let Teddy and me stay in his house (mind you, Teddy is incontinent and didn't have his diaper on, which I warned him about) while Mom was on her way home. He gave me a jacket and some water, even when I said I was fine, but you could tell he wasn't totally sure about trusting this random, sobbing girl at his door because he asked me a thousand questions about my story and quizzed if I really did live in this area. Obviously a good cop, but after a day like that, I was just terrified of an old man who appeared a bit gruff. But thankfully Mom got there to save the day and I am forever grateful for that guy. WOW what a story for a simple question. Is there a bulletin board in your room? No. Is your mom a big health freak or your dad? Or neither? "Health freak" seems a bit extreme for both of them, but Mom is more concerned about health in general. Do you know anyone who wants to be the president one day? No. What kinds of chips are in the cupboards? We just have tortilla chips, I think. I try to keep snacks out of the house to avoid temptation, and who eats plain tortilla chips. Do you have your mom's or dad's hair? Mom's. What’s the first thing you see when you walk into your bedroom? Most would probably notice my Nightmare Before Christmas poster first, being as big as it is and on the wall opposite the entrance. Do you prefer the truth, even if it’s harsh? YES. I NEED to know this kinda stuff, even if the truth is really hard to hear. Do you have any friends who have naturally red hair? I don't think so. Have you ever cried when a teacher retired? I think I did when my very first band teacher did. EVERYONE loved him. Like, the entire school. Does your kitchen look like it was designed in a completely different decade? No? When’s the last time you wore heels? Great question. Probably not since my sister's wedding in '16. Do you have your mom’s or dad’s eyes? My grampa's on Mom's side. What’s the best date movie? Probably a rom com? Have your parents ever been out of the country? No. How many pairs of jeans, all together, are in your house? Zero. Do you swear and yell while playing video games? I'll swear under my breath or seethe in frustration, but I never yell. Is there any alcohol in the fridge? No. Has a best friend ever ditched you for a girlfriend/boyfriend? Pretty much. Whenever she starts dating a guy, she dips, and whenever/if ever we talk, she rambles absolutely endlessly about him. Do you know anyone who has grossly skinny eyebrows? I couldn't possibly care less about how your eyebrows look. Do your pets chase after bugs? Roman and Bentley sure do. Bentley is a Professional Fly Moncher, specifically. When’s the last time you were so excited you couldn’t sleep? Why? Uhhh good question. Probs the night before Sara got here for my b-day. What is your mom’s favorite movie? Hm, good question! I'd ask her, but I don't want her to ask me why I am lmao. What TV family reminds you of your own family? Probably none. Did you ever really believe that the stork brought babies? No. I don't remember what I thought, but I know it wasn't that. Do you have any relatives who really spoil you? No, I think? Well Dad gives my sisters and me way too much money for Christmas and always tells us to ask him if we need anything, but I pretty much never ask him for said things, so I don't know the extent he'd go. Are there any drawers in your house that are just filled with junk? Pretty much. Is the last person you spoke to in love? That's my mom, so I doubt that with all I know. Do you know anyone who has security cameras in their house? I don't believe so. What was the last movie to make you cry? I think the last was Coco. Moana may have made me tear up, but I can't remember... Has anyone you know ever pulled the fire alarm in school, joking around? Not to my memory. What time do you usually go to sleep at sleepovers, if ever? I haven't been to a sleepover in God knows how long. Who was the main character in the last book you read? Alice Liddell. Who are the last people you saw kiss? Via YouTube, Jeffree and his boyfriend. Irl, I don't know. Have you ever posted a fan fiction on a website? No. Do you ever fantasize about your future wedding? Who’s the bride/groom? Not very much. Like I've had brief daydreams about it, sure, but it's not something that's on my mind a lot. Still got a long time before that happens. What was the last unpleasant thing to wake you up? My cat not knowing how to keep his mouth shut. Would you rather look at clouds or stars? Stars. Well, it depends; stars if we're in a completely isolated area where you can see them crystal clear or the clouds are boring, but otherwise, clouds if their design and colors are cool. Do you have any relatives who are expecting a baby really soon? No. Do you ever wonder what the opposite sex do at sleepovers? No. When you get married, who will be the maid of honor/best man? My mom, no questions asked. When’s the last time you broke plans? Why? I wasn't feeling well. I was supposed to see my VR coach that day. Have you ever been in a wedding? What were you? Yes, my sister's. I was a bridesmaid. It was an absolutely awful experience because I was hot as fuck, it was triggering as HELL with me still grieving Jason, and I felt positively hideous in a dress when I was at such a horrible weight. I wish so dearly I could redo that day; I fell like I put a serious damper on my sister's big day. Would you feel safer with an alarm system or security cameras? Hm, depends on the scenario... I guess an alarm system? Like security cameras will show a murderer climbing through my window, but they're not gonna wake me up to save my ass. Does it matter to you what kind of shampoo you use? So long it smells nice, isn't watery, and doesn't only add oil to my hair, I don't care much. Has a stray dog ever tried to bite you? No. When riding a bus, do you prefer to sit in front, in the back, or in the middle? Hm... idk. When I took the bus home with Jason, we always sat in the back, and that's really the only time I took a bus regularly. I think otherwise, I'd prefer the middle, closer to the front? I think I usually did that on occasions like band competitions and such. Have you ever been on a cross-country train ride? No. Are you normally a person to tell people off? No, that's rare. Is there any TV show that ended that you wish hadn’t? Meerkat Manor. Though I would hope they'd lessen down on the false story-telling. Stick to the true KMP events. When you feel stressed, do you take things out on the wrong people? Sometimes. Do you even wear any jeans other than skinny anymore? I don't wear jeans period. What did you talk about at lunch today with your friends? N/A Are you sensitive to caffeine? Definitely not. My system's too used to it, probably. How do you usually get around? Mom drives me. I'm 23. :^) Which languages do you wish you could speak fluently in? German. Have you ever been accused of being too clingy? SURPRISINGLY no, at least to my memory. Do you like Vitamin Water? Never tried, don't want to. What was the last thing you took a picture of? Dad and me on his birthday. Do you know anyone that uses Sprint as their phone carrier? Idk. Well, I think. When you go to McDonalds, what drink do you usually get? Coke. Do you have a Kindle or iPad or neither? Neither. Would you rather read or write? Write. When was the last time someone took a picture of you? Sometime during Bobby's visit literally days ago. I already forgot who took it... and who else was in it lmao. Do you own a pair of slippers? Yeah, two. A meerkat pair and then a far less extra pair that're closer to socks. I think they have cats on them? I got them for Christmas I think and haven't worn or seen them much. Would you rather see Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood in concert? Not a fan of either, but Carrie Underwood is more tolerable and even has a couple songs I enjoy. Name something negative that you hate about yourself: I'll jump to a conclusion within .02 seconds of something negative happening. Or not even "negative" or something that's purely in my head. Is your house currently hot, cold or just right? The house itself is fine, and my room is just right because I have my fan on. Is there a Dead End road near where you live? I can't think of one off the top of my head, but it's likely, really. There's lots of those here. Growing up, did you see your cousins often? No. We live many states away on both parents' sides. Where was your first job at? GameStop. Who are you tired of seeing in the news a lot? (Celebrities) It's been like two days and I'm over seeing the James Charles/Tati drama everywhere. You can't be interested in the YouTube community without being drowned in that shit right now somehow someway on any YT-coverage page and YouTube itself. Have you ever had to call and complain about a product you bought? I personally haven't. Would you date someone who’s shorter than you? I very openly and severely judge you if fucking height means that much to you. Do you mind being the third wheel? Not really, no. I'd only feel uncomfortable if they were getting pretty intimate. Has a kiss ever made you weak in the knees? Um I didn't know that was actually a thing so no. Do you feel comfortable buying condoms? Never been in that position. Have you ever dated two people at once? No. Have you ever been tested for STDs? No. Well wait, that time I gave blood I probably was just out of safety protocol. Have you ever run into your ex with his/her new sweetie? No. Have you ever felt guilty after doing something sexual? When I was in that "wait does this break the abstinence rule" phase, yeah. God was I technical. Have you ever had a condom break during sex? N/A Do your parents know if you’re having sex? Well considering I'm with a girl and she lives states away, that answer's obvious. Do you eat chips or crackers more? Chips. Would you rather be a singer or a dancer? A dancer. Would you rather be a musician or a painter? A painter, maybe? If I could play the electric guitar, though... idk. What social media sites do you visit the most? Facebook. What did you hair look like in high school? Long, thick as fuck, brown (or dyed black) with some sort of highlight, and it was split to the left with the hair swooped over my right eye. Basically "I want the emo swoop but my hair is too fucking thick to obey hairspray." :^) Which dollar store do you shop at? Depends on what's closest, usually. We rarely ever stop at one unless it's for candy to bring into the movie theater, seriously lol. I think usually Dollar General? Do you prefer candy corn or conversation hearts? WE DON'T KNOW EITHER. Skeletons or scarecrows? s k e l l y b o y s Has anyone ever given you the silent treatment? Yep. What’s the weirdest thing you’ve ever had in your mouth? I learned on that day I hate giving blowjobs. Has anyone ever threatened you with a knife? No, thankfully. (If you’re a girl) Has anyone ever called you ‘shortie’ instead of girl? BOY I would fucking cackle. I hate that word. No. Do you ever watch The Simpsons? No. Have you ever sent an embarrassing moment of yours into a mag to be printed? OH MY GOD I remember that!!! But no. What IS your most embarrassing moment? Too lazy to go through the novel of 'em to pick the worst. Do you think you’re more cute or sexy? You assume I find myself either. Do you own any mini skirts? I don't own any skirts period. Do you draw little hearts and stuff with eyeliner next to your eyes? No. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever lost? Idk. Has your mom ever lied to you? I'm sure she has before. Do you have a deep voice? For a girl, yeah. When’s the last time someone made breakfast for you? *shrugs* Exclusively for me, probably never. Do you do something new with your hair practically every day? No, it's the same everyday. When someone knocks on the door, who do you think it is? Delivery guy. Has anyone ever licked your foot? Ew no. Do you play games with boys/girls, like ‘hard to get’? I'm not 15. Has a guy ever quoted a romantic Shakespeare line to you? No, and I'm glad, as I'd cringe into another realm. Is there a Sonic where you live? Yes, I LIVE- Do you smile with your teeth? Usually. I look less high, at least. What did you eat for lunch today? A pb&j. What do you like on your pizza? Pepperoni, jalapenos, or meat lovers. What is in the back seat of your car right now? I don't own a personal car. Mom has a a load of stuff in the back of hers, at least I think... That's super rare, but she's been so ungodly busy idk if she's had time to clean it out. I haven't paid attention so can't recall. What was the last thing you threw up? Idr. Menthol or regular cigarettes? I don't smoke and never have, so idk. What is your favorite episode of Friends? I don't watch it, and I haven't seen many episodes at all if for whatever reason I was in a room and it was on. Does anyone have any blackmail on you? No. Have you been to a strip club? No. What’s the last sporting event you watched? Hell if I remember. It had to either be my 16th birthday when Jason's family was all together watching the Super Bowl, or a hockey game with my dad. Last person’s house you were in? Besides my own, my sister's. Who is the last person you sent a message to on Facebook? Nicole. Ever go to camp? No. Were you an honor roll student in school? Yeah. Do you have a tan? HA no. How old do you want to be when you have kids? I don't want kids. Are you someone’s best friend? Yeah. Favorite gemstone? Dragon's breath opal. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Drive thru, almost always. Does your first memory involve your dad? No. When was the last time you went swimming? Last summer at the beach. Holy fuck the water was so perfect. Has your luggage ever gotten lost? No. Have you ever thought it would be cool to smash a guitar? No. Like... just why. Do you ever get flu shots? No.

[thevikingsheaux]

A Viking Samhain

A/N: Happy Samhain!!! I know I am a little late but I’ve been busy. This will probably be a 2-3 part series. There isn’t much dialogue in this chapter but there will be more in the next. I hope it isn’t awful though I feel like it probably is.

Pairing: Hvitserk x reader

Warning: none really

Masterlist

Setting: So this is kind of a mashup of Vikings and Celts in Ireland. From my understanding, the Celtic tradition of Samhain started several hundred years before the “Viking age” and a lot of Ireland had transitioned from paganism to Christianity by the time any Vikings arrived in Ireland. However for the purposes of this story, I wanted the Celts and Vikings to coexist before Christianity, so this is by no means historically accurate!

The brutish strangers who had arrived on ships two moons ago were still camped nearby. They had planned to move on a couple weeks ago but for some reason, your father, the chief of the town and its surrounding farms, invited them to stay and travel to Tlachtga with everyone from the town for Samhain. Tlachtga was a sacred site, usually open only to the Druids, but open for everyone on Samhain. 

It was a bit odd that your father invited strangers who had different gods to such a sacred festival. He said that he did it to be generous to his guests, but you knew better. Your father was curious about them and their way of living. He wanted them to stay a while longer so he could learn more about them.

Your father had always been an inquisitive spirit and loved to learn about the world and its many cultures. He adored foreign visitors and always picked their brains about other peoples and places.

Many years ago, when you were much younger, four men who spoke the same tongue as the ones who were camped near your town now landed on the nearby shores. Your father invited the men to stay for almost a year, which allowed him to learn some of their language and vice versa. You picked up on much more of their language than your father had since you were so young and your mind still pliable.

So, now you translated a lot of what the newcomers said for your father. The three who seemed to be in charge of the rest knew a small amount of your native language and claimed that their father had taught them.

Their names were Ubbe, Ivar, and Hvitserk and they commanded a sizeable number of warriors. Even though Ivar was a cripple, he seemed to be the most respected and even feared of the trio. There were both male and female warriors in the Viking force which delighted you. You liked to watch the females sparring on the outskirts of their encampment and wished you could join them.  

When these new strangers who spoke the same tongue as the four men from years ago arrived, you remembered some of what the four men had taught you. Not only did they teach you their language, but they told you about their gods and their people and culture. They worshipped several gods, similar to you and your family’s tradition, however, their gods were different than yours.

One of the brothers had caught your eye and he seemed like he was fascinated with you as well. Any time your father invited them to sup with the family, which was quite often, his eyes never left you. He usually looked like he wanted to devour you and was so obvious about it that even your father noticed.

One night when the Viking visitors were not around, he brought it up. Your mother and three of your brothers were all sitting around the table and grew quiet when your father spoke.

“One of those men has his eye on you, Y/N. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. Hvitserk I think his name is,” your father observed. His face was unreadable. “As you know, you are my only daughter and a more than beautiful woman,” he continued. “I don’t expect you to remain chaste forever, but I ask that you wait for a husband.”

Your mother exclaimed, “Cian!” and hit him on the shoulder. Your brothers snickered but tried to contain themselves.

Your cheeks grew warm and you looked down into your plate. You poked at your food and wished you could turn invisible. “Father, can we not talk about this?”

“Well, I’m just saying! I don’t want to become a grandfather while you don’t even have a husband!” he said defensively. “When will you choose a husband anyway? I’ve hosted many eligible suitors over the years and yet you refuse them all. Soon enough I will have to just choose one for you or else you will no longer be able to bear children!”

You scowled at him and snapped, “You know, a woman’s only purpose in life isn’t just to have children.”

“I know, I know, but I need grandchildren!” he said with an eye roll. “And I won’t be around forever!”

Now you thought back on that conversation often. Your father was right. You wanted children and you were still young but you worried that if you didn’t have them soon you would no longer be able to conceive.

You also thought about your father’s warning to wait to have sex until you were married every time you caught Hvitserk staring at you. He was a very attractive man and you couldn’t deny that you wanted him too. You had only spoken to him a handful of times excluding the conversations you translated, but you were infatuated.

He was one of five sons of a man named Ragnar Lothbrok and was from a place called Kattegat. He flirted with you relentlessly and even brought you a small bouquet of wildflowers one day. Winter was approaching quickly so there weren’t many flowers to find. He must have worked hard to gather enough for a bouquet. You thought they were beautiful even though they were nearly dying because of the weather.

Hvitserk also told you about his mother, who was a Völva. At first, you were very confused and had no idea what a Völva was. When he explained, you were intrigued. You told your father about it and he immediately wanted to speak to Hvitserk and the two brothers he had with him, Ivar and Ubbe, to get more information. He had once met a female druid with similar powers and he wanted to discuss it in detail.

---

Samhain was now only a week or so away and you were excited because it was one of your favorite celebrations. The veil between the otherworld and your own was said to be the thinnest during Samhain, making it easy for spirits to come and go. Everyone dressed up to blend in with the spirits that roamed the earth during this time. This year you planned to paint your face elaborately, wear a cloak you made, and don a crown of flowers and leaves you had been nurturing, keeping them alive just for your costume.

There was to be a bonfire built by the Druids, sacrifices, feasts, and more at Tlachtga which was a few days walk from your coastal town in the northern part of the realm. The local Druid that advised your father made sure that everything was arranged to make the trek there and that you would all have a place to stay during the celebration. The Viking strangers had also been preparing for the journey and had most of their things packed and ready to be loaded onto the mules your father was lending them.

Everyone was set to head out in the morning and you couldn’t sleep. You were excited to make the journey and participate in the festival. Also, your father had announced that your oldest brother, who had been off studying to be a Druid since you were just a small girl, would be attending the festival and intended to reunite with the family. You had not seen him in many years and looked forward to the reunion.

You were very curious about how the Vikings would react to the traditions of Samhain. What would Hvitserk think of you and your people? you wondered. Eventually, you drifted off to sleep, but dreams filled your head, making you restless.

A few hours later you woke to the sounds of the town bustling around your home, preparing for the journey to Tlachtga. You got out from under your blankets and furs and dressed. 

When you emerged from the warmth of your home a cool breeze tugged at your clothes. You spotted the party of Vikings, ready and waiting on the outskirts of town. Hvitserk was perched atop a horse along the edge of the Viking horde closest to the town, eyes scanning the crowd. When his eyes found you they stopped and he smiled mischievously.

To be continued

A note about the father, Cian: First of all, you pronounce it like “key-inn.” I got the idea for the father’s name from a list of old Celtic names on this website. I chose this one because this was the description underneath it: “The name means ‘long-lived’ or ‘ancient one’.” I want the character to have an air of imperishability/immortality/great wisdom, so I found this a fitting name. Also, I imagine him with an Arthur Weasley type curiosity about the world.

About the cover art: That green circular thing in the top right corner is at Tlachtga in Ireland. It’s real and super cool! Here’s a link to more info about it.

Finally, a note about Druids: They were not only priests but legal authorities, adjudicators, lorekeepers, medical professionals, and political advisors. They are incredibly interesting to me and I can link some websites so you can read more about them if you want. 

Tags: @laketaj24 @tephi101 @grungyblonde @captstefanbrandt @missrobyn81 @moondustmemories @supernaturalvikingwhore @hallowed-heathen @ariellostatci @vikingalexthedane @anarchy-is-coming @alicedopey @lisinfleur @voodoodollgirl @backstagepaige @oddsnendsfanfics @whenimaunicorn @lol-haha-joke @heathen-whore  @credulouskhaleesi

If you want to be added to or removed from the tags on this short series please let me know. 

[whaledesu]

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Those antique metal, enamel coated cups.

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

Lollipops

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

Bubblegum

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Idk, I was a pretty normal child.

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

Depends on where the soda comes from honestly.

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

I really like fashion, but goth fashion out of those.

7. earbuds or headphones?

headphones are preferable 

8. movies or tv shows?

Why not both?

9. favorite smell in the summer?

The rain, always.

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

Dodgeball I guess, the part where you don’t get hit, not throwing lol.

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

Sleep.

12. name of your favorite playlist?

It’s just called Mood Dump. Lol

13. lanyard or key ring?

key chains 

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

Probably Jolly Ranchers

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

If it was an assigned one I don’t remember, they always made us read the same ones over and over.

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

Indian style, always 

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

just some grey slip on ones

18. ideal weather?

cold, raining, clouds overcast in the sky with a bit of a breeze

19. sleeping position?

half on the side, half on the stomach with a leg pushed up haha

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

On my laptop, it’s easier to be able to spit out words as fast as possible

21. obsession from childhood?

BATMAN

22. role model?

Kyo from Dir En Grey

23. strange habits?

I eat my food one item at a time a lot, don’t know why

24. favorite crystal?

idk does Amythest count? I like those as well as Emeralds

25. first song you remember hearing?

Probably something from Disney movies

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

Stay inside in the air conditioning lmao

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

Just stand outside and inhale the air deeply

28. five songs to describe you?

In no particular order, without context:

1) Tousei - Dir En Grey 2) Closer to Fine - Indigo Girls 3) The Final - Dir En Grey 4) Glass Skin - Dir En Grey 5) Heavy - Linkin Park

29. best way to bond with you?

Talk to me about the food and movies you love

30. places that you find sacred?

Anywhere in nature that feels untouched by the world really

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

Batman’s costume

32. top five favorite vines?

I don’t even remember any at this point lol

33. most used phrase in your phone?

Probably something like “alrighty”

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

For some reason I always remember “It’s pizza time”

35. average time you fall asleep?

My sleep schedule is as chaotic as I am lmao

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

idk ones probably before I knew what memes even were

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Suitcase all the way

38. lemonade or tea?

Black, iced, sweet tea only.

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

No, I hate citrus desserts.

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

Once in middle school in language arts, I just heard my teacher say to a kid in my class suddenly: “Brandon, put your penis away.” 

41. last person you texted?

Matt I think

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

pants pockets are invaluable

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

I love how bomber jackets look, but I am a hoodie person through and through

44. favorite scent for soap?

Cherry Blossom

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Superhero is not a genre? But I choose horror anyway.

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

T-shirt, pajama pants allllllll the way

47. favorite type of cheese?

Swiss

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

Pineapple I guess, the outside does not match the inside lol

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

Here’s a handful. “Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.” “Treat others how you want to be treated.” “Let it go, Let it be.” "Face the abyss, but don't let it consume you."

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

Just way too many things that would take too long to list.

51. current stresses?

Haha, loaded question fam

52. favorite font?

Segoe UI

53. what is the current state of your hands?

Soft, with a scrape on my thumb and a new scar on my right ring finger lmao

54. what did you learn from your first job?

Adults play more games than kids do

55. favorite fairy tale?

If Red Riding Hood counts that one

56. favorite tradition?

Watching horror movies with my Mom

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? Losing my Dad Being very personally betrayed by someone Everyone I get close to eventually walking out on me

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Idk I’m just me fam

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

Something with magic and travel

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“Feed me Seymour!”

62. seven characters you relate to?

Spike - Cowboy Bebop Snorlax - Pokemon That being said I’m too lazy to come up with the other 5 right now

63. five songs that would play in your club?

People lost their shit when “Yeah” by Usher played every time

64. favorite website from your childhood?

Gaia Online

65. any permanent scars?

Yeah a few but nothing major

66. favorite flower(s)?

White Roses, White Lotus, ones I don’t know the names of

67. good luck charms?

My 22 pound fat ass orange cat Genji

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

I’m just gonna go with brussels sprouts

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

the one where pineapple eats you back

70. left or right handed?

I’m mostly left handed but also right handed with some things

71. least favorite pattern?

idk?

72. worst subject?

Math

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

probable elote 

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

somewhere between 5 and 7 depending on my mood

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

I was probably like 6?

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Gonna have to say au gratin potatoes man

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

whatever makes you happy

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

gas station coffee is a special thing

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

my old school photo for sure lol

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

what are jewel tones? tf

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

lightning bugs yo

82. pc or console?

PS4

83. writing or drawing?

writing

84. podcasts or talk radio?

music please

84. barbie or polly pocket?

barbie

85. fairy tales or mythology?

both fam

86. cookies or cupcakes?

cupcakes

87. your greatest fear?

I’ve already lived most of them so who cares but lets go with drowning

88. your greatest wish?

that my anxiety would fuck off forever

89. who would you put before everyone else?

My cat lol

90. luckiest mistake?

I’m not sure?

91. boxes or bags?

they do two very different jobs tf

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

moonlight please

93. nicknames?

Uru, Kyo, Rea

94. favorite season?

Winter

95. favorite app on your phone?

idk idc

96. desktop background?

A drawing I liked

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

like 3

98. favorite historical era?

Victorian

[neverlendabook]

11 Questions Tag

Thank you @brightbeautifulthings for tagging me! Rule: answer the questions at the end of this post, then come up with more of your own and tag more people.  

1. What’s the best gift you’ve ever received? 

The best!! Idk, hard to pick, I’ve received a lot of gifts 😅 (#spoiledbrat). First thing that comes to mind tho is when I was 16 and my dad called and said his wife was pregnant and I was going to have a little sister. I got so excited on the phone that the friend I was with thought he was getting me a car. (she was v disappointed when I informed her that no it was just a baby half-sister lol)

2. Which five songs do you listen to most right now?

I listen almost exclusively to carols in December, soo... lots of Sissel and Celtic Woman, O Tannenbaum, Auld Lang Syne, that sort of thing. Of and for some reason Spotify literally played like eight different versions of Old King Wenceslas for me today, IN A ROW. 😱

3. What’s your favorite cartoon?

(including Anime here) Toss-up between Sailor Moon and Avatar:TLA/Legend of Korra. Also How to Train Your Dragon and Trollhunters / 3 Below. Depends on mood. 

4. Who are your top three OTP’s?

I CAN’T PICK JUST THREE I AM SORRY. But my main OTP in any work of art ever is female protagonists/agency and happiness haha. 

5. What’s your favorite dessert?

😂 JUST ONE???? okay uhmm... probably chocolate ganache. Or chocolate fudge w/ vanilla froyo. 

6. Which authors do you trust enough to read anything by them?

Ohh awesome question. Hmm...Terry Pratchett, definitely (I read Good Omens because of him, despite not liking Neil Gaiman at all). Used to be Marian Keyes too but I kind of changed my mind about her after This Charming Man. Ilona Andrews, probably! Everything I’ve read by them has been great...actually, I put their Hugh d’ Ambray novel on my Christmas list despite misgivings about the character, so we’ll see if the ‘trust enough to read anything by them’ principle still holds after I read it😉. 

7. Do you like having background noise/music when you’re working?

I prefer silence, if possible. bad focus lol. 

8. If you could learn any new skill, what would it be?

MORE LANGUAGES. I want to speak all of them.

9. Which books made you love reading when you were a kid?

Honestly I’ve loved reading for as long as I remember. I read random kiddie comics when I was 4-5, so maybe they were what got me into it? Haha idk. can’t remember a time when I did *not* immediately go crazy over a stack of books. 

10. What languages do you speak?

English, Klingon. 😁 (jk I am not actually fluent in Klingon. I do speak a smattering of German due to family, but it’s mostly English). 

11. What’s your favorite fairytale? 

WHAT A GREAT QUESTION. I have many. As a kid I loved Brothers Grimm...there was one tale of a lady who goes to pick berries and finds a house with three dwarves and...at some point she turns into a duck idk😂😂 I can’t recall the title, but the moral was ‘be nice to people and don’t spit frogs’. Also, Spindle, Shuttle and Needle. And I used to love King Thrushbeard as a kid, but as an adult I am questioning the validity of that marriage and the treatment of the spoiled princess haha. 

Non-Grimm-wise, I loved Arabian Nights (Ali-Baba especially) and Wilhelm Hauff’s fairy tales (possibly my fave was Little Muck). Also I had a book of fairy tales from around the world, and my hands-down favorites from every culture were the ‘clever animals outsmart people/mean animals’ ones. Like The Donkey and the Tiger, also The Fox and the Bear. 

I love these questions so will steal a couple for my turn😋😋

1. If you could pick a fictional world to live in, which would it be and why? 2. What character would you want to be BFFs with? 3. What character from a book you’ve read deserved better? 4. Who are your favorite villains? (and why) 5. What fictional pet would you like to have? 6. What’s your favorite mythology tale? 7. What would be your ideal job? 8. What makes you decide to buy a book? 9. What’s your favorite type of cookie? and finally, the two questions I’m stealing from @brightbeautifulthings😁

10. What are your favorite fairy tales?  11. Which authors do you trust enough to read anything by them?

I’m tagging @colescorner @thespiritknight @custardhoneybee @sb-reads @future-bestseller @previouslyafangirl @anassarhenisch @awarmcupofno​ @wildangel-love​ -- only if you feel like doing it, tho, no pressure!