#man listing some of these im like ... i wonder if any of my shit is someone's favorite fic | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

valeriianz · 5 months ago

Note

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

#yooooo #this took me a long time to answer lol #i gotta go to bed but #THANK YOU SO MUCH TJ!!#dreamling #(why not. there's a lot here let put it out into the main tag!)#fic: bolt in the blue #im so satisfied ahhh thanks again #:)

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braxlrose · 1 year ago

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Hi!!! A new fan of tokio hotel here and I was wondering if you could write some dating headcannons for gustav for a gem reader whose also in a band? Much love btw <3

I've been looking through the requests and finding georg and gustav stuff so yall can get some more so here we go!!

dating gustav

cw: mentions of sex, cockwarming, kissing, oral (f and m recieving), etc.

✮ he's the type of guy who holds the side of your waist while walking down the street. not for possessiveness or any of that shit, just because he likes it and it makes you feel safe. He also knows the sidewalk rule. keep that in mind ladies.

✮ even though gustav is a fantastic cook now, he mostly just made stuff from boxes in the 2000s. but yall would always make stuff together.

✮ when you're on your period, he always makes you stuff. especially milkshakes. he's got a signature one, which is just vanilla ice cream, peanut butter and bananas. but it tastes amazing, and gustav always puts so much love into it.

✮ he gives you backrubs, and footrubs, brushes your hair and brings a heating pad for you. im telling you guys, he's literally the perfect bf.

✮ when yall finish a song on stage he comes up behind you and gives you hugs and kisses. and the fans eat. it. up.

✮ but if he's not wearing a shirt and he comes up behind you, he's gets you all sweaty. I just love you so much I can't help it. he says. but let's be fr. he's just a little shit. we still love him though.

✮ he tries to teach you how to play the drums, he sits you on his lap and holds your hands and wrists to show you what to do. and he rests his chin on your shoulder which he ends up breathing in your ear. totally doesn't make you clench your thighs and get wetter and wetter every single. but mans also gets soooo annoyed when you're doing something wrong 😭

✮ cockwarming while teaching you how to play drums is a must. i don't remember who wrote it, but I swear I remember reading it somewhere. @bored0writer edit: THIS IS WHO WROTE IT AND ITS AMAZING OMG

✮ like I had said in my last post, gustav is a soft dom. disagree w/ me all you want, but it's true.

✮ after concert cock sucking is so good. you both love it so much. you have adrenaline running through your veins and it feels so good.

✮ he has the softest lips in the entire world, it's insane. so kissing him is so nice.

✮ he takes you on the cutest dates. whether you two are going out to dinner, to a movie, or just staying at the hotel rooms, they're always amazing.

✮ he's also got super soft hair which is amazing to run your hands through when making out or fucking.

✮ he'll lay between your thighs for hours after teasing and leaving hickies on your thighs.

✮ he likes to hold down your thighs when he's eating you out and fucking you with his tongue because it gives him better control and he likes that. a lot.

✮ whenever you try and rut against his face while he's going down on you, he'll slap your cunt as many times as he wants until you learn your lesson (if you're into that).

✮ and on the other side, he's a big sub too. always moaning and groaning and whining and wriggling underneath you as you pump and suck on his cock. ironic huh. he's so sweet and whiny. and he's totally got a mommy kink. big time mommy kink.

✮ loves it when you ride his thigh. thinks you look so sexy.

✮ if you play the guitar, you'll try and teach him how to play too but he'll end up complaining how his fingers hurt. poor baby :(

✮ you two always share hotel rooms and stay up watching movies together

✮ I STAND BY THIS. he is the best cuddler to exist. he's so soft and squishy, and since he's got some chub on his stomach, he's so nice to cuddle with.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed!! TY for all the requests

tag list:

@burntb4bydoll

@hearts4kaulitz

@saumspam

@spelaelamela

#tokio hotel #gustav schäfer #gustav schafer #gustav schäfer smut #gustav schäfer x reader #gustavschäfer #gustav is so sexy omg #tokio hotel x reader #tokio hotel smut #smut #fluff #hes so fucking hot #soft dom gustav lives in my head rent free

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amidstnamjin-and-binchanlix · 1 year ago

Text

how long can you stand the heat || ot7

Warnings: Uhhh, none I think? Non-graphical smut and slight angst, but that's pretty much it for now since I'm still crafting the next part, and some curse words lmao.

I won't control you, but MDNI. This is not for you, please.

Pairings: OT7/(F) Reader, Jackson Wang/(F) Reader

Plot: The one where your soulmates don't want you in their life, so you give them what they want and stay out of their way.

Genre: not really unrequited love (but they're all idiots), mutual pining, angst, denial of feelings, poly ot7

How do you think I'm going to get along

Without you when you're gone?

You took me for everything that I had

And kicked me out on my own.

Are you happy? Are you satisfied?

How long can you stand the heat?

Out of the doorway the bullets rip

To the sound of the beat.

mixtape: all i have left to give - part 1 - part 2 - part 3 - ending 1

I originally posted this on ao3 last April but I've just recently thought, "why not post this on tumblr now that i'm using it again after a few years?"

this fic is v self-serving, and was brought to you by my ✨maladaptive daydreams✨

first fic i posted here. idek what im doing but lezzgawwww

Title obviously came from AOBTD. Thank you, Sir John Deacon. You are heaven-sent for making this iconic and legendary bop.

This will be a part of a multi-fic series and i've already crafted 80/90-ish% of the next part im so sorry my mind isn't cooperating rn

✨️

God must be testing your patience.

I mean sure, you might not also be sure that there is indeed a god out there somewhere. However, you must have pissed off some deity or you had pissed on some old man of the mound. Either way, you don't care. You're pissed off now, too.

You see when they rejected you and asked (read: avoided you like the plague until Sejin spoke with you) not to speak or interact with them, you respected their wishes. It stung, but it's not really surprising.

It's not a secret that the seven of them are soulmates, polyamorous soulbonds not even a rarity in and out of the industry. However, it's also not a secret that they're very exclusive and don't let too many (if any) other people in their circle because of the things they had to endure as a group. It makes sense that they wouldn't want a new person intruding and messing with their dynamics, soulmate or not.

(deep down you want to say it doesn't make sense. you're their soulmate, why can't they accept you like that? but there's still nothing you can do, isn't there?)

And so, you delegated all your tasks related to their group to your most trusted employees completely and avoided them at all costs. And by 'at all costs', you mean everything. You even deleted all their songs on your playlists and blocked them on social media (even on Spotify). You can co-exist with them without interacting, although it makes your chest ache through the bond because of the soul rejection like a 24/7 acid relapse.

It's fine. You can ignore all that. You can handle rejection. You've been used to this since you were a kid; adult you can handle this.

Soul rejection side effects? Nothing meds and doctors can't fix. Technology has never been more advanced and all that jazz.

You're a mature person, and you pride yourself on that. You don't like confrontations that much and would rather step back as much as you can to disengage. If your soulmates don't want anything to do with you, then you'll back off.

But you sometimes wonder if they can feel it too, the soul strings fraying and slowly decaying. After shit went down, it's bouts of nausea and dizziness, and constant chest aches for you. That's not even half of it. It'll take a whole day for you to list all your symptoms.

If they do feel it, does it add to their list of reasons why they hate your existence? You mean, they had been borderline antagonistic since your first meeting, cold but civil at best.

It was a contrast to the way the tiny soul marks on each of your fingers glowed on your first meeting even until after Taehyung and Yoongi fled in what you can guess is disbelief and refusal, the others following suit. The warmth in your hands felt scorching, and you had never wanted to scrub them with water in your life then more than you ever did, your chest beating hard and painfully. You remember feeling like someone slashed your insides with a hot knife, and it has never stopped being in pain ever since.

What else were you supposed to think other than they hate you?

Not wanting to risk another embarrassing conversation with Sejin (bless his heart), you decided to book an appointment and signed up for the relatively new soul-scraping therapy. It's still in its human trial stages and is slowly being recognized as a way of severing soul ties, albeit not approved and sanctioned by the government. Anything to give and honor their wishes. They're your soulmates, and it's innate in you to give people what they want.

(or was it really just that?)

All of that and everything else, you can take. You live and abide by your life motto to stay out of drama, so you take all of it in stride and with dignity because it's all you have left at this point when it comes to them.

This is where you got pissed off, though. This day takes the cake, this sodding party.

Attending the party was certainly not your idea. You're tired from the long-ass meetings you had today—JYP's team asked for a meeting for your agreement with Day6 since Sungjin got discharged a few months ago with Younghyun following suit in a few days. A party is definitely not on your to-do list. If it's up to you, you'll be going home to your phone and fics.

(and if they're bangtan fics, nobody has to know. this, you can let yourself have—you were advised against going cold turkey from them by the doctors handling the soul-scraping therapy, after all. if you can't have them, maybe you can at least indulge in fictional them.)

You have been minding your own business since you arrived at the bar. It's laughable how socially inept you are despite handling your business and meeting the entertainment industry's biggest names and leaders regularly. When being put in parties and other gigs that force you to socialize just for the sake of socializing, you're back to being the fat loser kid that avoided making new friends because the ones you previously had in childhood (if you can really call them that) can't understand how your brain and mouth work. Frankly, you don't, too, so you just preferred to stay in one corner until it's socially acceptable to go home.

"Hey." Jackson squeezes your hand in his and smiles worriedly at you. "You doing okay?"

Jackson had been a long-time friend and is someone you trust your whole life with. Jackson had seen you through your bests and worsts, but had never once turned his back on you or betrayed you as many people did.

Yeah, you would trust him with your whole life. Your panties too, but don't tell him that.

(there's no need to because he knows; he did lots of times before, with his face between your thighs and your undies in his pocket.)

"I'm good." You don't even bother smiling, knowing it won't convince him too much. He knows your stand on parties; you're his polar opposite, after all. "I just really wanna go home."

"Can I come with?" he asks with a salacious smile.

You roll your eyes.

"Stop being horny for five minutes, please."

"You shouldn't have worn that dress, then." He rakes you with an assessing look. "On second thought, that's the best decision you did tonight so far. If you're not going home with anyone tonight, my room's open."

"You up to be my wingman?" you ask.

"Sure. I'll sit with you all night so we can look like a swinger couple scouting for a third we can take home." He waggles his eyebrows.

You snort at that with an amused chuckle, oblivious to the glare(s) directed your way by—who else?—your soulmates.

They (Taehyung) heard from Manager Sejin and Noona Ae-cha that you're not sure if you can come. They didn't know why the two were talking about you, but Taehyung tried to act immersed in his phone while eavesdropping.

Apparently, you had been stuck in the boardroom almost all day with the back-to-back meetings, and you even had to cancel your doctor's appointment. For what the appointment is for, he didn't know. It explains your absence that day, and he files the information away at the back of his head. He can't for the life of him understand why he can't stop trying to spot crumbs about you.

(he does know, but he's in denial about why—and he'll deny both.)

He then told his hyungs and Jungkook, which they just nodded at, seemingly uninterested. But if Namjoon's faraway serious look at times is anything to go by or the way Jimin picks at the skin on his lips as he's lost in thought, he's pretty sure they are also subtly trying to figure out if you're coming.

(but they'll all deny that if asked.)

They haven't seen you that much since they started actively avoiding you months ago and shut down whatever soul link you have with them, and you are damn good at trying to stay out of their way.

It surprised them, they're not gonna lie. They expected you to put up a fight, but all Manager Sejin told them was that you agreed. You never interacted with them ever since unless it was really needed, and you were always wearing your rings and not making unnecessary eye contact even once.

(and that somehow pisses them off and itches under their skin because how dare you not be interested?)

And now you've been here for the past hour or so, Jackson Wang in tow. Or rather, Jackson has his arms alternately snaked around yours or slung around your shoulders. It makes Jackson look like a frat douchebag.

(and it makes taehyung look jealous and interested in you which he is so not, no.)

Hoseok was the first one to spot you arriving, Another One Bites The Dust thumping through the dancefloor that was bathed in red lights. He nudges Namjoon from his seat in their secluded and swanky VIP room that was separated one floor above the bar proper.

"There she is", he says then, gesturing towards you as all seven pairs of eyes land on you as you enter with Jackson. "She's with Wang."

With varying levels of internal turmoil, they all watch as Jackson led you through the throngs of people, presumably to another room like theirs. They see you shake your head and point to the bar, and Jackson's face light up with a wide smile before redirecting your steps.

Yoongi asks himself why you have to wear that dress or why Jackson has to clutch at your hands like a little kid, the others having a similar train of thought. Does Jackson think he's going to be lost in this bar? Is he that plain stupid to be lost in this bar, really?

And why are you letting him?

Jimin tries not to let his eyes wander on your legs, tries not to let his mind wander back to the thought of being choked by your thick supple legs and ripping that off-shoulder dress off you and—

Oh. Woah, there.

Stop it! he thinks to himself and shakes his head.

(this is not the first time he's thought of this, darling. when he first saw those smooth and lovely-looking plump thighs, he knows he was fucked.)

Jin is no better, but he hides it better than the others. After all, it was not his idea to shut you out like that. He was opposed to it and tried to talk some sense into the others, but they didn't listen. He thought back then that Namjoon would at least be reasonable and give you a shot but nooo, the kid was stupid enough to listen to others.

Let them have what they want, then.

(he can feel the pit and longing in his chest some nights and thinks that maybe he can let the others do what they want but still do what he wants too. but he takes a look at the six men who had been there for him through thick and thin, and he can't lose them. he sends you an apology mentally, hoping you can at least feel it through the bond.)

"Calm down," Jin tells them levelly, trying to pry the glass off Namjoon's hand, lest he crushes it and injures himself. "You're crushing the poor thing, Joonie. Don't wanna end up in the ER, do you?"

Jackson's the one to end up in the ER if he doesn't unwrap his arms from your shoulders, that's who, Namjoon thinks to himself bitterly before he can stop himself.

Jin leans back on his seat and watches as you laugh with Jackson, arms slung around your shoulders as the latter listens to you talk. They all wouldn't have to seethe in barely contained anger if they just listened to him though, so who's at fault here?

Aish, these brats.

"I'm going to get more drinks," Jungkook suddenly says, disentangling himself from Taehyung fluidly.

"You can just ask them," Namjoon says, pointing towards the glass doors where their security detail is posed out of the room. "There's no need to go out."

"I'm going to get more drinks," Jungkook repeats firmly, ignoring him. Namjoon's jaw clenches. "Come help me, Jin-hyung?"

Ah, this conniving brat. Jin wants to kiss his pouty lips for this.

"Sure," Jin says easily, much to Namjoon's annoyance. He pats Namjoon's cheeks gently. "No breaking the glass, Joon-ah. We have a photoshoot tomorrow."

He pulls Jungkook out of the room before any of them can disagree further. He loops his arm around Jungkook's petite waist, nodding once to the man stationed at the door.

"You're not just getting drinks at you, aren't you?" Jin asks as they descend the steps.

"I don't know what you're talking about, hyung." Jungkook's smile is sharp. "I just don't wanna get roofied and end up on the tabloids tomorrow, is all."

"You don't have to lie to me," Jin says, kissing his hair. "I wanna see her, too."

Jungkook's smile turns sad at that.

"I just don't understand. [Name]-noona seems like a nice person. They're all being stupid."

Jin has to agree. "But you know why we have to, right? I don't like it, too, but we have no choice."

"But we do!" Jungkook insists. "We can be friends, even."

"Friends don't fuck friends." Jungkook snorts at that. "There's nothing 'friends' about wanting her with us, Jungkook."

"Friends don't fuck friends, my ass," Jungkook mumble mockingly. "That didn't stop Jackson-hyung at all."

Jin stops momentarily, pulling Jungkook to a stop. "Excuse me?"

"They were having sex last week, hyung. When Jackson-hyung came over last Wednesday."

"Was that why...?"

"Yeah." Jungkook takes his hand as they walk again. "I felt it through the strings, too."

Jungkook is suspiciously not meeting his eyes.

"Jungkook-ah."

"What?" he asks innocently. Jin's lips pull into a smirk.

"You naughty cat!"

"I—what? No!" but Jungkook is still not meeting his eyes. "I didn't watch them."

Jin gasps delightedly.

"This is so much better. I didn't even say anything yet!"

Ah, fuck.

In Jungkook's defense, he hadn't meant to listen in. But he had been on his way back to the practice room from relieving his screaming bladder when he heard it. The warmth and arousal that was definitely not his he had been ignoring since that lunchtime was not helping his curiosity.

"Ah!" And oh shit, it's someone moaning and it's you.

That explains the arousal he's been feeling. Oh, and the jealousy now (his), too.

"Yeah?" A deeper voice asked breathlessly. Another punched-out moan from you, and the arousal flares in his chest.

Yup. It's definitely his this time.

"Jackson, please," your equally breathless voice pleaded, and the sound shot to his cock. Jungkook had to stop his hand from going south inside his pants and boxers.

A delighted shriek and breathless laugh, followed by a staccato of 'ah ah ah's and hips slapping against each other punctuated the otherwise silent afternoon he was having.

And what would a self-respecting man do?

Stay and listen to you get railed six ways to Sunday, was what he did.

(jungkook didn't say he's a self-respecting man.)

Jungkook slipped his hand inside his pants and boxers and wrapped his hand around his aching cock. He almost moaned at how your moans quickly reached a whole other level of desperation. He wondered and tried to imagine how you would feel around him if he fucked you harder and deeper than Jackson possibly can.

He knows he can.

"Hands, Jackson." There was a chuckle, then your whine was heard. "Baobei, please."

Jungkook heard Jackson's sharp intake of breath, and he had to internally agree. Even speaking Mandarin, you sound so hot.

He heard you mewl with a choked giggle as the sounds of hips to hips got faster.

"You really like my hands, huh?" Jackson asked.

"Mhm. Want them wrapped around my—ah!—neck all the time."

Fuck.

Jungkook had to bite onto his hands as he came, so as not to give his position away, cock spurting on his hands,. Seconds later and he heard you cry out and Jackson grunt to completion.

So, no. He definitely didn't watch.

"You nasty, nasty boy!" Jin cackles at him and he wants to pout. "You listened in to them having sex?!"

"Hyung!" Jungkook hisses. "Not too loud."

Jin snickers at him, mouth pulled in a tempting smirk he wants to kiss. "Was it good?"

"Hyung," he whines. At Jin's unfaltering smirk, he sighs. "It was. She sounds so good, hyung. I can't take it off my mind."

"Maybe later, we can do something about that." Jin says with a low hum.

He peers at Jin's eyes and almost shudders at the dark and hungry look in them. Jin squeezes his waist, and it takes Jungkook's breath away.

In his silence, Jin nods with a hum.

"Hm, definitely later."

He won't say no to that. If they can't have you, Jungkook's gonna take what he can get, even if it means settling on replaying your moans in his head.

When they reach the bar, you are still sitting at the other end with Jackson. They are careful not to be seen by you or you'll probably leave like you always do when they get within your 10-foot vicinity.

Then Jackson puts his hand on your slightly exposed leg. He feels the others' jealousy through the bond first before he feels his own, and he sees you stiffen in your seat.

Hyungs!

Jungkook quickly looks away, but not before Jackson catches his gaze. He completely misses the way Jackson's mouth pulls into a quick smirk as their drinks are thankfully served at that exact moment.

"Wanna head back to your place?"

You're unexpectedly suddenly close, and it's like Jackson wants him and Jin to hear to rile them up. It works, and he can barely tamp down the urge to pour the drinks over Jackson's big head, being older be damned.

"Sure. I'll just swing by the restroom." You say as you walk away. Jin and Jungkook take that as their cue to go back to their ritzy room.

"That was short," Jin says tightly as they go back. "Was it you?"

Jungkook shakes his head.

Jin's lips quirk into an amused smile.

"Ah, jealous bastards."

"Weren't you too, though?" Jungkook asks with a slightly amused smile of his own. "That was... that was intense."

"That serves them," Jin says as they near the room. "If they weren't just pigheaded, it's my shoulders her legs are gonna be hanging from later."

"Jin-hyung!" Jungkoo huffs, but then deflates. "Yeah."

"Don't worry, we still have later," Jin says with a lascivious smirk.

And he can't complain about that, can he?

"Where's Tae-hyung?" he asks when they enter the room, Taehyung nowhere in sight.

"Went out. Didn't say where." Hoseok says as he accepts their drinks and puts the tray on the table. It takes a few seconds for him to piece it all together, and he mentally facepalms.

"Whatever happened to 'not giving a fuck' about [Name]?" he mumbles.

"Jungkook," Namjoon warns.

It sets him off.

"What? Are you all really going to keep on pretending? You do realize I felt that back there too, right?" he shoots back.

"So the drinks were just a ruse?" Namjoon's face is stormy.

Jungkook holds his gaze steady. "And what if it was? You all know what I felt about this since day one."

"Kook-ah." It's Jimin this time. "Not now, please."

"And when, hyung? When we go back to just pretending an eighth of our soul doesn't exist out there?"

"Jungkook."

He glares at Yoongi. "No, hyung. If you all want to be stupid, I don't! [Name]-noona is going through therapy because of this, don't you know?"

Yoongi scoffs. "She's a big girl, she can handle herself."

"Not soul-scraping therapy, she won't."

They all stop at that. Even Jungkook stops and internally curses.

Fuck, he wasn't supposed to say that.

"What did you say?" Namjoon's voice takes on a dangerous tone.

He huffs but stays silent, not really wanting to dig a deeper hole for himself.

"Jungkook."

"I talked to Jiho-hyung, okay? I bumped into him five months ago when he visited her."

Silence.

"Im Jiho?" At Jungkook's nod, Namjoon's frown deepened. "I didn't know he practices soul-scraping."

"He's co-authoring the soul-scraping study with Doctor Seong."

At the mention of one of their previous soul health doctors, Yoongi raises his eyebrows.

"Our Doctor Seong?"

Jungkook nods with a sigh, plopping down beside Hoseok. "Apparently, it's why he stopped private practice—to focus on the studies. They're also lobbying for fully legalizing soul-scraping in the Assembly. I ran into him, and he mentioned that he was there for noona's side effects from the therapy."

Side effects?

Shit.

"W-wait. Five months, you said?" Jin says with a tremble in his voice. "Is that why I can barely feel her anymore?"

Jungkook's sigh is pained, forlorn. "Apparently, yeah."

They all lapse in complete silence after that, the thumping of the beat on the dancefloor faint through the walls.

"Fuck."

Indeed.

It is then that Taehyung comes back. He takes one look at their varying degrees of solemn and stunned expressions and tilts his head.

"What? What happened?" he asks.

"[Name]..."

Taehyung's eyes widen before his expression smooths into indifference.

"I told you, I'm no—"

"That's not it," Jimin says softly. "She's in soul-scraping therapy, Taehyung-ah."

...

"What?"

(oh, lord. you don't know the turmoil you caused all these pining idiots, darling.)

---

And what about you?

As we said in the beginning, god must be testing your patience.

"Hey," Jackson says softly. He lifts your chin with a gentle smile long after Taehyung fucked off to god knows where. "You good, baobei?"

You didn't even know they were here. You were vaguely aware that yeah, they might be, but it totally slipped your mind. Meetings really did drain your brain.

When you stood up and went to the restroom while Jackson called for the driver, you didn't know that Taehyung was watching you from their room and completely high-tailed it from there just to intercept you when he saw you stand up from the corner of the bar. You didn't know why, but his stupid drunken ass just decided it wanted and it was a good idea to rile you up.

To piss you off is why, you think.

When you exited the ladies' room, Taehyung was standing there by the wall looking lethal. The ache in your chest flared up for two different reasons, but you ignored it. You ignored him and started walking away, pretending you didn't see him.

"So you're really here."

Seriously?

You continued ignoring him and walked on, but he didn't let you get far.

He grabs your wrist. "I said, you're really here."

The spot where he held you burned and you hissed, cursing the therapy's side effects. You were warned that coming in contact skin-to-skin with your soulmates while undergoing the therapy would feel painful (literally), but you didn't heed it then. You had no reason to touch them after all when they didn't even want to see you.

But it is painful, and it burns.

You yanked your wrist away, hiding your wrist behind your back. There's no need for that, though. Taehyung was looking at your face intently.

"Yes, and I was just leaving. See you around, T—"

"With Jackson?"

What's it with this guy?

You looked back at him and squared your shoulders up. "That's really none of your business, Taehyung."

He laughed with a sneer, shaking his head.

"What would people say if they knew you're off gallivanting with men who aren't your soulmate?"

Wow.

The nerve of this asshole.

You can't let him see it affect you though, so you tilt your head with an innocent smile.

"I'm just a nobody. Why would they talk about me? " You smirked in amusement. "I don't think it'll be me they will talk about since I wasn't the one who rejected my soulmate, was I?"

And oh, shit. Where did that come from, [Name]? Feisty.

"And I'm not doing anything illegal. Why should I be scared?" You slightly lean back and tilt your chin up. "I'm not the one between us with a reputation to uphold, a name I should protect."

You paused, a serene smile on your face.

"I'm not a coward. I'm not you, Taehyung"

The smirk on his lips was replaced with a sharp look of disdain, almost like he wants to slap the smile off your face.

(he wants to, darling. trust me. just not in the way you think.)

You knew you hit a nerve and it feels petty and mean, but it's nothing compared to the loneliness and pain they gave you these past few months. It felt satisfying, even if for just a bit.

"You really think you're all that, don't you?" He smiled almost mockingly. "Tell me, how does it feel to be rejected?"

That really stung and angered you, but you've spent all your life hiding your emotions when needed to. Your expression didn't falter.

"It feels good—"

"—because she dodged a bullet."

You internally sighed in relief as Jackson's voice float behind you. You'll forever be thankful for this man's existence, gods or not.

You melt in his arms when he wrapped them around your waist. You chanced a look at Jackson, not seeing the twitch on Taehyung's brows at your body language.

"You really think you're all that, don't you?" Jackson mocked back at him. "Imagine thinking it's the end of the world for your soulmate just because you shut down their bond." Jackson chuckled ruthlessly.

"You're pathetic, Taehyung-ssi."

The two were locked in a glowering match before Taehyung straightened up and spun on his heel without a word.

Jackson let you get your bearings by the wall of the hallway to the ladies' room in silence. But he didn't let you stew in your thoughts for long.

So now here you are, looking at his gentle eyes.

"You good, baobei?"

You don't know how to answer that really, so you pull him by the collar into a searing kiss.

He puts his hand on your waist, the other on the wall by your face, and you tighten your hold on his collar.

You pull away to gasp for air.

"Take me home," you exhale heavily as you lean your head on his shoulder. "Take me home and fuck me 'til I forget, or I might do something stupid."

Jackson's sharp intake of air is your answer before he pulls you away to your awaiting car outside the club.

---

feedback (constructive, please don't be too rude bc i'll cry) and kudos very much appreciated!

#bts soulmate au #polyamorous bts #soul bonds #kim taehyung u lil shit #soulmate rejection #idek what i'm doing okay i'm so sorry #they're idiots your honor #bts x reader #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #kim namjoon #park jimin #kim taehyung #jeon jungkook

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whatsaneggimcis · 6 months ago

Text

Signs everything I thought I knew was wrong

I needed to dump my thoughts and feelings somewhere because I feel like im annoying my support group. I think my egg finally cracked Wednesday and immediately I had to start researching and buying gender affirming things. Anyways, here's my list of signs that I wish I had seen like a decade ago, please be kind I'm very new to opening up like this

Another Girl in elementary threatened me with makeup and cross dressing and I wanted it bad.

I think this one is such a major factor in why I feel like this has to be real. Its well before puberty and well before I knew transitioning was a thing. Just a natural thought for someone who’s the wrong gender

Multiple times pleading with god to just make me a girl

Still cis tho obv

Thinking if I held still for long enough in bed, some sort of magic would make me a girl and fix this wrong body of mine

I still remember the dreams where im a girl, i legit became proficient at lucid dreaming just for it.

Ah fuck the egg_irl memes are hitting too hard

My favorite game character is Bridget, listening back to the song is hitting really hard actually

Legit had an anxiety attack and took a day off work because my transfem friend said “careful, i said the same thing before i came out”

Wishing i had magic to turn myself into a girl

Playing female characters just to feel cute

Putting on leggings in highschool, then sleeping in them

Some female mannerisms

Kinda hating my poor skin but couldnt do anything about it since thats only for women am i right fellas

Mild euphoria when someone says good girl

Envisioning myself as the girl during fantasies

Jealousy over a womans body

Ive never seen any man sit cross legged at a table the way i do, idk why that one pops up but i’ve seen plenty of other girls do it

Desire to steal womans clothing to cross dress

At current moment I have no desire to bite my nails because I want them to grow out, even though I was a nail biter for 27 years

In pre school, tried to convince another girl to swap clothes with me

In pre school, loved pretending i was at a hair salon and the other girls in the school would give me a haircut. It gave me ASMR

Speaking of ASMR, I like exclusively listen to makeup, nail and hair roleplays

Feeling like i dont want to transition because I could be ugly

After realization, I dont have nearly as much of an appetite, maybe subconscious bodily sabotage in the form of overeating

Not seeing any future when I tried to plan my life better, before I ever considered the option of becoming trans

Feeling hurt when my dad made somewhat transphobic comments about my trans cousin

Wondering what my parents would do if i woke up one day as a woman and had to explain that to them

Genuine euphoria at the idea of trying on womens clothing, but thinking that i was weird and kinky

Playing with stuffed animals with my best childhood friend, a fellow girl

Hating my balls

I bet it feels good to cry, its probably cathartic

Hating body hair god i hate this so much, I’m just bad at shaving it and dont want to be covered in razor burns and have to explain to coworkers why I shaved my legs and arms

Hating my nose

Adopting a super masculine persona

Forcing myself to have a much deeper voice to not feel any of my true feelings

Actually seeing a future after considering becoming trans

Being hurt by transphobic comments at work before I realized my egg status

Was I sending what they said to my friend because i was hurt by it and wanted reassurance?

When i started drawing again, i had no desire to draw “cool badass epic shit” i just wanted to draw super cosy watercolor paintings.

God damn it i’ll say it, I fucking love pastels. Both the art medium and the color spectrum

Repression of my desire to dance and sing, or I guess express myself in any format due to internalized transphobia

“Mens fashion is so lame, girls have it so good. Im cis tho”

Pure depression my entire adult life

Wanting genuine friend connections with women in a more feminine way

Never caring about going out and buying clothes because none of them worked for me

Trying to force myself to not look at girls clothes because “thats only what weirdos do”

On this topic, how the fuck did i think this shit was normal… i wasnt watching women or anything, its not like i was being creepy in reality. I just wanted to see the womens clothes. Why is that such a bad thing for someone to want

Being jealous of my friend since he was openly wearing his girlfriend’s sweatshirt

Dude i stared longingly at a pink gamer girl chair, still cis tho

Speaking of gamers, being super jealous of C9 Sneaky that he could pass so well and was totally fine with showing that whole side of himself online. Same with Finnster.

I think i hate my voice, ever since realizing this about myself i cant help but hear my voice and think its not me

Being afraid to see a therapist because im not sure honestly

Fearing crying, but that might not be internalized transphobia and actually just be a side product of the vice grip on masculinity in society

Daydreaming about becoming a girl

General body dysmorphia

I want to cry but i cant, why cant I cry why

#egg irl #transgirl #trans woman #transgender #trans #closeted #lgbtq #lgbtqia

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asmutwriter · 1 year ago

Text

You Saved Me (Part 11)

DESCRIPTION: (Season 10) After doing some job hunting you bump into your friend Dean but he's not traveling alone

WORD COUNT: 3597

From Beginning / Previous / Next / Master List

WARNINGS: demon Dean, swearing, single mum, knives, violence, choking (in a none sexy way), details of injuries, details of fighting, smut, choking (in a sexy way), dom Dean, sub reader, hitting, oral (f recieving), orgasm control, biting, unprotected sex (reader is on the pill), hair pulling, creampie,

DISCLAIMERS

- This is fiction. Please always talk to your partner before doing anything and make sure they are ok with what you are doing beforehand

- Not been proof read

You put the various shopping bags into your boot. Cursing as one of the bags falls out. Spilling thevarious food items onto the car park floor. You kneel down. Cursing as you realise the bag has split. "Youve got to be fucking me". Resting your forehead into your hand as you try and regain your sanity back.

"Here" you hear a British voice say "let me help. They gave me an extra bag. You can use that one" you look up. Seeing a man with dark hair, facial hair, and light eyes holding out a plastic bag.

"Thank you" he opens the bag. Holding it out as you start placing your items into it. You see the bag he was holding. Filled with what looks like mainly beer. He must be having some party. "You're a life saver" you smile at him as he chuckles slightly

"Thats debatable but... thanks" you place the last items into the bag. He passes the bag to you. Taking it from him. STanding up as you place it into your boot. SHutting it down you turn to thank him again. He kneels down

"I think you dropped your ring" he picks it up. Flinching as it burns his skin slightly. You freeze slightly. Thumb going to the two rings still on your fingers. "SHit" he says. Looking at the ring then you. He stands up, pushing his shoulders back slightly as he watches you bend down. Grabbing the ring from the floor you place it into the bag. Based on the ring he touched you deduced hes possessed. You stand back up and look at him. His friendly demeanour has changed into a passive aggresive one. He goes to speak but you shake your head slightly

"I dont want any trouble" he watches you, his lips slightly apart as he analysises your behaviour. He knows that yiy know what he is. Yet he relises you show no sign of fear. You put your hands up in a slight defense pose. "Ive had a really shitty day and I just want to go back home and forget today happened" you put out your hand. Your left hand - the one without the rings on. "I promise. Thats all I want to do" he nods slightly. Taking your hand he shakes it. You smile slightly ar him "thank you again for the help" you drop his hand, going to the front seat of your car. Getting in you check the rear view mirror. The man you saw is now gone. You grip the steerig wgeek. Letting out the breath you didnt realise you were holding.

"What the fuck just happened...?" you mutter to yourself. Checking your backseat. Hitting the seats and double checking the footwells. "Youre fine. Im fine. Im fine" you say. You check your phone for the time. Perfect. Enough time to drop the shopping off at home then go job hunting before you have to pick your kids up from school. You start driving. STopping at the first pub you see. No luck. The next three cafes and two bars you get given the same response

"Sorry we arent hiring at the moment"

You pull up to the bed and breakfast. Desperate at this point. You go inside. Smiling at the person behind the desk "Hey there. Im looking for a job and I wondered if you had any availibilty?" she looks at you. Nodding slightly

"I will contact my boss and see if he has any places for you" she grabs a pen and paper "if you write down your details then we can contact you" she smiles at you as you write down yor name and number. You thank her. Turning around you and going to the car park. You unlock your car. Going to open it you see a familiar face. Smiling as you lock your car back up. Walking over to Dean as he opens the door to his room

"Well aint this a nice surprise" he turns to face you. Hand moving from the handle as he smiles, his eyes trailing down your body

"Wasnt expecting to see you here" he says as his eyes meet yours again "arent you a bit far from home?" you nod

"Its a long story"

"I have time if you want to come in for a bit?" you bite your bottom lip slightly before nodding. He smiles, opening the door for you. Letting you go in as he follows. Taking his flannel off, leaving him in just a shirt. You take off your coat. Placing it over the back of the plush airmchair. He grabs out two beets before he sits down on the edge of one of the beds. You go and sit on the bed opposite him. He offers you one of the beers. Taking it and taking a sip of it.

"God I needed this" he chuckles, drinking his drink as he rests his hands on his knees. Leaning forward as he looks at you

"What happened?"

"I got fired from my job. But no where is hiring so Ive had to come and look furhter out my comfort zone. It sucks but it is what it is. I need money and waiting is what Im good at" he nods, maintaining eye contact wih you

"SOmething else is bothering you"

"Yeah. Lydia has a cold, Anna has new baces so shes in pain all the time. My landlord is a dick and keeps being weird around me meaning I need to leave and find a new place to live" you break the eye contact "plus I did some shopping earlier and my bag broke which just really added onto my shitty day. Evrything just costs money that I dont have and its just stressing me out" he nods slightly. You place the beer to your lips, downing the rest of the drink. He chuckles slightly as you place the now empty bottle onto the bedside cabinet.

"I get why your so stressed" you nod. Rubbing your face before looking at him again, smiling softly before you shut your eyes slightly

"I'll be ok. I always am" he nods. You can feel his eyes on you. You open your eyes as you feel him move near you. Placing down his beer next to your empty one. He gently places a hand on your leg

"I can help relieve some of your stress, if you'd like?" a soft smirk on his face as he swipes his tongue over his bottom lip. You nod slightly, watching as he stands up. He comes over to you, gently tracing your bottom lip with his thumb "do you trust me?"

"Yes. I trust you Dean" you whisper. No hesitation in your voce as he smiles at you. Your eyes fixed on his ashe gently pushes his thumb into your mouth. You wrap you lips around it. STicking your tongue out slightly as you suck on the digit. He lets out a soft grunt. Moving his hand down as he grips your jaw with his hand. Bending down as he kisses you. You grip his shirt near his stomach, feeling him push his tongue into your mouth. Letting out a soft whine as he tightens his grip onto your jaw.

You feel him moving his hand down to you throat. Pushing you down so you lay on the bed. Your legs over the edge. His lips still on your as your hands let go of his shirt. Gavvig his wrist as you feel him move his lips to your collar bone. You feel him move his leg between yours. Pushing his leg up, his thigh pushng against your core. You rut your hips slightly against him. A soft moan escaping your lips. A dark chuckle brushes air over your neck as he moves his face back up to yurs. A quick kiss to your lips makes you open your eyes. Half lidded as you meet his. Dark from lust a he smiles down at you.

He gently squeezes your throat. Causing you to let out a whiny sigh. Rutting your hips against his leg. Biting your lip as the friction of your jeans hits just the right spot. He titls his head slightly as he looks at you. Letting go of your throat as he stands up. Slowly undoing your jeans and pulling them down the lenght of your legs. He kisses the insides of your thighs. "Please..." you whisper. He comes back up, kissing you as you feel his figertips dance over your bare legs.

"Are you still on the pill, Rose?" you nod slightly. Feeling his fingers trace around the top of your underwear. Pulling them down your legs and throwing them onto the floor. Dragging his fingers over your cunt. Causing you to gasp out slightly as his finger finds your clit. Rubbing soft circles onto it. "Cum without my permisiion and there will be consequences, understood?" You shut your eyes. Feeling him moving beside you, only focusing on his fingers. You gasp out as you feel him hit your senstive pussy. "Understood?"

You meet his eyes. Nodding as you watch him kneel down. "I understand". He smiles. Pushing your pussy apart as his tongue finds you clit as easily as his fingers had. "Holy fuck" you moan out. Hands going to his head as you hold him close to your core. Gripping his hair as you feel him push two fingers into you. Gridning your hips against his tongue and fingers. Getting closer and closer to your high. "Dean. Please" you groan. He hums in repsonse, causing virbations to go through your core. "Shit. Go-gonna cum... Please... wanna cum..." he hums again. You can feel a soft smile on his face as you rut your hips more aggresivly. His free hand coming round and resting on between your pubic area and your belly button. Pushing down hard onto it.

"Dean!" you cry out "Please" gripping his hair tightly as you try your best not to orgasm. With every flick of his tongue, curl of his finger, it get more diffuclt. You feel him move away slightly. Uttering three simple words

"Cum for me". With that you let go. Your legs clamping around his head as you pull him close to you. Truly unholy sounds coming out from your lips as you feel yourself letting go. You let go of the grip you have on his hair. Unclamping your leg. Eyes flutering open as you feel him pushing your shirt up as he kisses over your stomach. Eventually pushing it over your breasts. Biting at the flesh exposed by your bra. Kissing your neck before he pulls your tip over your head.

Hands going over your boobs before trailing around your torso. You arch your back, allowing him better access to unhook your bra. He tosses your clothes onto the floor. Leaving you completely naked in front of him. His hand goes to your cheek as he kisses you. Yur brow furrows slightly as you taste yourself on his tongue. Your hands going to the back of his hair, gripping it as he leans over you. Kissing you deeply as he wraps his arm around your waist. Pulling you up as he pushes himself off of the bed. You place your feet onto the floor. Moving away from his lips as he pulls away. Pulling his shirtr over his head. You bite your bottom lip as you trace your nails down his chest and stomach. Causing him to give you a devilish smile as he watches you.

You trace your hands over his biceps as he undoes his belt. Keeping eye contact as he removes his lower halfs. Hearing them drop ont the floor you lean forward. Kissing him gently as you place your hands on the side of his face. His hands go to your hips. Pulling away from the kiss he turns you around. Kissing your neck before pushing between your shoulder blade. Making you bend over, hands resting onto the bed. His hands grip at your ass, kicking your feet apart slightly so he can see you better. On full display for him. You feel a prodding at your entrance. Feeling him push himself fully into you.

"Fuck" he mutters. Your mouth a silent O as he stretches you out. He doesnt leave you much time to adjust before hes starting thrusting in and out. You grip the bed sheets, soft whines and moans leaving your lips as he grinds his hips against yours. He places a hand on your lower back. Allowing him to go faster and deeper. You hide your face into the bed. Muffling the noises you make. You feel his grab you hair. Pulling you by the roots upwards. Your back against his torso as he slows his thrusts slghtly "let me hear all those pretty noises" you shut your eyes tightly as he harshly thrusts. Moving the hand that was on your lower back down to find your clit. Rubbing onto it a he speeds up his thrusts again.

"Dean oh god"you moan out. "Wanna cum"

"Not until I say so" he almost growls into your ear. You keep your eyes shut, resting your head into his shoulder as you focus. Feeling him but trying not to cum.

"Please Dean..." you mumble "please" he kisses your neck

"Soon..." he mutters in repsonse. Picking up his pace. He moves his hand from your hair to your throat. Gently squeezing it. Your hands grip at him. On going to each of his hands. Gripping his wrists tightly as you feel his hips starting to lose their rythm. You let out a long whine as it gets harder to old back your orgasm. He grunts, nipping at your shoulder before whispering to you "cum beautiful"

With those words you let go. A truly sinful moan leaving your lips as you collapse against his body. You faintly register his grunts happening before feeling him stilling his hips. His seed filling you up. You moan out at the feeling. Moving your hand from his wrist up to his head. You turn your head. Planting a kiss to his lups as you grip his hair. The grip on your throat tightening slightly. The both of you heavily breathing as you come down from your highs.

"I think thats the best fuck Ive had in a long time" he chuckles at your statement. Dropping his hand from your throat

"Cant argue with that" he smiles. You feel him pull out of you. You push your legs toegther instinctiyl as you feel your mixed juices start to come out of you. He chuckles slight.y Going into the bathroom he grabs out a towel. Handing it to you, you use it to clean yourself up. Chucking it back into the bathroom. Putting your bra and pants back on as Dean puts on his pants and jeans. Just as the door opens. You grab your shirt, placing it onto yourself you turn. Freezing slughtly as you see the man from the car park.

"WHy do you never learn to knock?" Dean says

"Its a shared room. There are ways to show if youre using it" the british mans looks at you, smiling slightly "Pleased to meet your aquaintance again. I never did get a name"

"Rose. My name is Rose" you murmer "Hey Dean can I have a chat with you? Please?" he looks at you, then at his friend.

"I'll wait outside" they exchange a look. One you dont quite understand. As soon as the door shuts you turn to face Dean

"I know this is going to sound insane but you need to trust me with this" he nods. Going over to his bag he starts shuffling around it "Ok so your friend out there"

"Crowley"

"Yeah whatever his name is. Hes a demon. I met him earlier and he touched my ring and I left him to it because I had a really shitty day and I couldnt be bthered to deal with-"

"Kat. Breath" you stop. Taking in a breath. He tilts his head slightly to look at you. Watchng as youre chest rises and falls deeply as you calm your nerves. Turning back once youd regained your breath

"I didnt want to deal with demons at the time. So I left him. And he left me. But I feel like I should tell you this as Im worried he might do something to you"

"I'll be ok" he turns to face you.

"I know you will be but I thought I should tell you so that you can be prepared for when he turns dark eyes on you" he chuckles slightly. Holding up the item in his hand.

"Do you know what this is?" you look, shaking your head slightly. SOme sort of bone looking item. Teeth on it still and everything

"No" he takes a step towards you, both your eyes on the item as he holds it up.

"This is the first blade" eyes looking at you as he continues to step closer t you. You step backwards insticntivly. Eyes now on him as he smiles. Not his usual cocky smile. This one is a lot more sinister. "Its a powerful weapon. Destroys all living things so long as the user has the mark of cain"

"Thanks for that brief history lesson" you say. Sarcasm on your voice as you try and hide the fear you feel flodding over your body. Determined to stand your ground as he now stands infront of you. Your brain going frantic over what might be happening. Not a shifter. Or ghost possession. They wouldve reacted to your rings. You run your thumb over your fingers. Only two rings. Your blessed one still sitting at the bottom of your shopping bag. He places it onto your cheek bone. Smiling as you shake slightly from fear. Eyes on his as he darts his tongue out accross his teeth "Dean. Please fight this. Kick the fucker out" he chuckles. A low, dark chuckle.

"This is all me sweetheart" he trails his knife down your face. You grab his wrist. Pushing the blade away from you as you pish against his chest. Moving him away from you as you make a bolt for the door. You get it slightly open. Just about to get out you see a plam close it shut. SLamming the door. The hand that was on the door now grabbing your throat. Bringing you close to him as he drags you away from your only exit. Your hands grab at his tightening fist. Just as hes about to choke you out he drops you. Throwing you slightly down as you take in deep breaths. Hands coming up to your throat as you choke for air, moving backwards as you stay sat on the floor. Your back hitting the end of the bed frame

"Come on. Wheres that fight in you?" you shake your head. Him towering over you as you look up at him

"I dont want to hurt you Dean" he laughs as he comes closer. You try and go further into the bed.

"Thats a shame. Because I have no problem with hurting you" you go to kick him. He grabs your ankle. Pulling yu down so your safety of the bed behind is taken away. The sudden change forcing you to lose balance and lie on your back. You dont have time to react as he drags the blade over the length of your thgih. You cry out, hands coming up to cover over your chest as he kneels down. Straddling over your waist.

"Please Dean. Please stop. I-" you stammer before you can finish your words. He smiles slightly

"Go on. Say it" he smiles a truly wicked smile as those words mock you. Taunt you. You feel your bottom lip tremble slightly as you say those three little words.

"I love you..." you whsiper out. Your eyes darint between his. Hoping to see some sort of humanity appear behind him. SOm sort of mercy. But there is no emotion. No sign of affection towards you. Instead you are met with an almost feral look. The smile still adorning his face

"I think its funny that you think that will stop me from killing you" he says in an almost sing song. "If anything that'll make this more fun" he grabs your hands. Pinning them above your head as you try and wriggle out from under him. Feeling him use the edge of the knife to lift your shirt up slightly. Cutting your stomach just below your belly button. You scream out, trying to move your hands away from his grip. He goes to cut you slightly higher up when theres a knock at the door.

"Help me!" you scream out. His hand with the blade in coming up to cover your mouth. He leans down close to you. SHushing you as he meets your eyes. Only mere inches away from your face as he smiles.

"I wish we had longer" he moves his hand from your mouth. Gently tracing the blade down you throat until it rests in the centre of your stomach "But that was my cue to hurry this along" he pushes the blade into your belly. Pain filling your body as you feel him remove the weapon. Bringing it up slightly you feel him piercing it through your chest. Causing you to cry out again before the world turns to black.

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robintherobiner · 10 months ago

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Types of fics i need more of:

de-age fics. Baby Bruce? Teen Bruce? Baby Dick? Teen Dick? Baby Jason? Teen Jason. The list goes on and on. deage them all. is it sad? is it funny? is it cute? is it traumatic? i dont care, make them all little.

ghost fics. i want Jason to haunt the shit out of his family. he sees them all grieving, comes back to life, and instead of killing people he just leaves ominous notes like "i saw you trip on your cape." or "leave fifty bucks at *address* or i'll tell everyone about your superman body pillow."

Tim being an utter loser. I love him, but he should be incredibly put together in public and then he gets home and just... is a mess. never felt the touch of anyone, woman or man. can do complex mathematical equations but needs a calculator to solve 4 x 3. think Sherlock Holmes, who can tell everything about you from one look but doesnt know the earth revolves around the sun.

Alfred being called out for being an enabler! fuck that old man, i hate him. however if he made me a cup of tea, i would die for him. Im a very complex person.

Dick being Damians dad. so cute, i love it. Damian deserves to have his own taste of found family. fuck blood of the womb, lets go with blood of the covenent or whatever the quote says.

Jason being childish!!! i think his mental age should younger than his physical one cuz, trauma, being dead, being catatonic in some cases, also just being pretty young anywas? gimme a fic where he comes home covered in blood cuz he just killed four guys and then goes to have a shower so he can play with his rubber duckies.

kiddie crushes!!! gimme more Jason loving Wonder Woman and being an utter fanboy when he encounters her. "Oh em gee you're here to apprehend me? Wonder Woman, this is such an honor, can i have your autograph-" Young Dick meeting Superman for the first time and hiding under Bruce's cap because "He's so pretty Bruce, he's gonna hear my heart go fast!" Tim meeting Constantine and, to everyones despair, somehow adoring him. "So you do magic? Thats like, so cool! Tell me all about it. My parents were archeologists, we probably have loads of of magical objects, do you wanna check them? Do you like coffee? Did you really sell your soul to multiple people? Thats so hot- I MEAN COOL SHIT FUCK-"

Literally anything about Dicks time in the circus. I think i've only read like two fics about it? Compared to the hundreds going indepth on Tim and Jason's childhoods?

Similar to the last one, but gosh the culture shocks they all probably had! Dick was used to constantly moving from city to city. Jason going from being on the street to a mansion. Tim going from boarding school, a place full of kids his own age, to being alone in his house so that he could be Robin. Damian was used to being respected and honored, he was a prince after all, only to suddenly be told that everything he knew was wrong.

Babs and Tim. I think they would get along, i wanna see them bonding!

Joker Junior. i know its not canon and it was only in like one cartoon but oh my GOD i love it.

Trauma reveals!! i love them. Dick's time in spyral, his apprenticeship with Deathstroke, the multiple fucked up relationships he's been in. Everything Tim did during 'Brucequest', Jasons time with the LOA, literally anything from Damians childhood.

Jon being aged up and his relationship with Damian! i dont even need to add anything, you get the point.

Dana, Jack, and Janet. I want it so bad!!! Dana is implied but never confirmed to be dead so bring her back and let her and Tim mourn!! let Tim find out his parents both slept with Bruce and have Bruce be like "oops i forgot about that, soz sweetie-" let tim hate christmas eve because thats when his mother was buried!

if anyone has recs for any of these sort of fics, PLEASE GIVE THEM TO ME. i've probably read most of them already, but i have a terrible memory so i love re-reading fics. just, gimme gimme gimme

#i love my babygirls #dc comics #dc universe #batman comics #batfamily #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #fic rec #fanfiction #batman fanfiction #batfam

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bearofohu · 1 year ago

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since level-5’s localization branch closed down a couple of years ago, im honestly wondering how this will affect the english release of nwos

dont get me wrong im not at all concerned for its existence—its going to exist most definitely. not only is nwos included in christopher robin miller’s business website (he lists 8 games hes worked on, when his voice only appears in seven), but nobody is more aware of layton’s incredible popularity in the west than level-5 themselves. professor layton was inspired by the west, after all. it would be franchise suicide to not localize it and that’s the last thing l5 is trying to do after making a reboot so crappy that it nearly bankrupted the franchise

but since there’s no localization branch anymore, it’s likely level-5 is for the first time ever outsourcing their projects’ localization, and that’s what kinda concerns me. the reason a lot of anime and games have shitty dubs is bc they get outscored to companies that can’t be fuckin asked (funimation is a good example)

localization divisions of game companies specifically can be shit too (treehouse is a good example) but level-5’s branch always made a genuine effort to produce good dubs. thats why all of their voice actors fit the setting; they're all bri'ish, and most of if not all of them did genuinely good jobs (im not tolerating slander against lani she did her best. i blame whoever casted her she was not designed to be voicing a 11 yr old cockney child)

and that's why it worries me to see nwos be outsourced - we have no way of knowing how the dub quality will change. obviously christopher robin miller is not going to stop voicing layton, we're not going to get any kind of chris pratt mario shit bc hino is not a backstabber

but what DOES worry me is the possibility of nwos getting outsourced to one one of those companies that dont give a shit. i should note that the the likelihood of this isnt very big just given how aware level-5 is of layton's prevalence in the west. layton is not like most anime/anime games, its not going to have its dub be unceremoniously flung to some low-effort team to hire the same non-union white man you recognize in every fire emblem game

but still, just because its unlikely doesnt mean its completely impossible. in the second l5 vision hino mentioned that inazuma eleven's next game is getting internationally released, which means the same is almost certainly happening to nwos (the fact this is happening is actually kind of huge - every other layton game before this has had to wait up to a year after the game releases in JP for the localization)

as much as it pains me to give any non-hershel level 5 game anything but my cold and dismissive scorn, i will be checking out inazuma eleven victory road's english version when the game releases in 2024 (its not guarenteed that victory road and nwos will be outsourced to the same people btw, but that kind of thing is common)

and unless victory road's localization ends up sucking some seriously crinkly ass, i dont think we have anything to worry about

#professor layton #pl #pl nwos #new world of steam #level-5 #not tagging inazuma i dont want to jinx them #long post

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tokillamockingbird427 · 1 year ago

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listen, originally i was gonna post either this or a very angsty ask either next week or the week after since i posted an ask on monday already,but heres something i feel like elias may do :) (is it dad elias? probably, yea i think…)

contributing to the previous anons ask(not the rick roll one.. that shits funny im sorry lmao) about elias carrying hesh & logan in baby slings, i feel like he still does, but randomly, carries or hugs hesh, logan or even any of the ghosts to this day just not in baby slings of course. but the man targets logan.

why logan? well, the poor guys the youngest(son AND in the team, not to mention the second shortest besides kick, whos an inch or so shorter.), and is kinda light for a 6 foot guy(hes 170 ibs according to the wikis… i think half of that is pure muscle.), making him a perfect target for carrying/hugs. he doesn’t mind it… some days. some days he just accepts defeat and other days, this man SPRINTS away and does anything to not get carried or hugged. (i like to think he doesn’t really like physical affection. also think of this— merrick(i chose him and i dont even know why.. brains not working well rn) drinking coffee in the afternoon to then see logan SPRINTING away from an elias whos running after him and later tackles him to the ground or face plants into a wall cause logan made a sharp ass turn)

logans suffering does NOT end there though, cause elias’ tantics go onto hesh, then later keegan, and the list goes on…

(hesh on the other hand does not mind it at all and enjoys when his dad does that. feel like that man LOVES physical affection.)

(also regarding my last ask: dont worry about not responding to my ask on time ! i was pretty fucking tired writing that so dont worry, we all get tired :).also, i live in the est timezone if ur wondering if we are indeed living in the same timezone :))

—🎧 anon

Laughing at me being Rick Rolled, how dare! (Joking)

Elias for sure saw that post where it was like "One day your parents put you down and never picked you back up again." so he vowed to himself to pick his boys up at LEAST once a week if not more because that shit hurted him. INCLUDING the Ghosties. Even Merrick. Mark his fucking words.

Half the time when Logan runs he's playing, and the other half he's serious and will wail like an angry cat when he's caught. Elias will back off if he realizes Logan's serious but that's usually after he faceplants into a wall. He will then goes and takes out the affection on Hesh, who is entirely too happy about it. Big goofball.

(Timezone buddies, hells yeah. And don't worry about sending multiple asks a week, send em daily for all I care lol.)

#call of duty #call of duty ghosts #elias walker #logan walker #hesh walker #task force stalker aka the ghosts #beloved anon #🎧 anon

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altschmerzes · 1 year ago

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augh. the fuckening continues. Some More Stuff has gone down with my shitty shitty dad. yes. the one that died. It Continues To Go Down, Some Fucking How.

if you saw me talk about this somewhere else already sorry lmao. i don't even know why i'm like. i know there are people who i want to know things about how my life is going and who are invested in how i'm doing who follow me here and wouldn't have seen this elsewhere so it's like. sort of a bulletin and also i'm still just. it's circling around in my head kind of inescapably so. here's this. sorry for the continued oversharing re: The Fuckening, hopefully this'll be the last of it but apparently there is no way to remotely guarantee that he will stop pulling shit like this despite literally no longer being alive.

theres been a whole Thing where my dad had a life insurance policy through his work and the people from his job contacted our family and said that my sister and i were listed as the beneficiaries on the policy and so they needed the death certificate and our information to get that taken care of. i have been the one primarily in contact with the lady handling it, we emailed and talked on the phone a few times. and then recently my sister got something in the mail from the insurance people and i didn’t and we wondered if it was a problem with my address being canadian or my name change and so i called the insurance company today to get that sorted. according to them, based on the information provided by his work, I Am Not A Beneficiary. it’s just my sister, im listed as a contingency in case something happened to them before him or whatever i guess. so now there’s. that. going on. which, like. it makes sense, my sister is the one he had a relationship with and that’s a choice i made and it’s not like im owed anything but it’s still like. once again my sister is everyone’s favourite and im Nobody to my family unless they’re directly reminded i exist. except that like. he did remember i existed. he deliberately and specifically listed me as the backup and it was like- i felt weird about the whole thing already. Really Weird about it but this did not. make me feel Less Weird.

and it's like i just. why couldn’t the HR person from his job have read the fucking form correctly if that’s what it said this whole time. why was i listed as a CONTINGENCY beneficiary in the first place. i knew that man, i knew how his mind worked, i remember how every time i saw him when we WERE speaking he would inevitably bring up my brother and how my brother wouldn’t talk to him and how much that sucked. listing my sister for this policy and then adding me as a Backup Plan was like. this wasn’t about wanting to take care of my sister and just not thinking of me at all. so it’s like all the rest of it and now just. knowing, like knowing this was a choice he made to Punish Me for not being involved in his life. because his focus was never on what he had it was always on what he didn’t and how unfair and horrible it was that he didn’t have it. if he just hadn’t thought about me at all his partner of 11 years would be listed as the contingency if they Needed him to have one, the only reason to have put my name down like that was to Make A Point and to get back at me for walking away from him and it just?

like who does that. i cant get my mind around it. there is literally no reason for my name to have been included the way it was except to make a point and that’s what im upset about, not the inheritance stuff, it’s just. he was a vicious, petty, vindictive person and he got one last shot in to hurt me the only way he could because i wouldn’t talk to him. that letter he sent last year to my grandmothers house, this, he like. he hated me, i think. some part of him was so angry at me that he hated me and wanted to hurt me in any way he could even just by writing my name down like Not You Though, The Other One Is The One I’m Acknowledging As My Child Who I Want To Care For And Protect In The Event Of My Death, But I Need It To Be Clear It’s NOT You on paperwork he probably never thought anyone else would see. how pissed and resentful do you have to be for that to be something you think to do.

just like. was it not enough. was what he did to me when i was a kid not enough. why do things have to KEEP happening. why does he KEEP needing to find ways to hurt me as bad as possible because that is the outcome he wanted. was to hurt me as bad as he could in whatever way he could. just. what the fuck.

yknow in my like. ninth grade english class there was this one super insane day after it was made extremely clear that my teacher had no control over the class and wasn’t gonna try and rectify that where these two kids who hated each other got in this big fight like. mid-class. and the way this fight took place is one of them was shouting across the room and the other was, and this is not a joke, repeatedly changing the name of a wifi hotspot on his phone, as a way of responding to her. this is about that level of petty, immature bullshit. conducting a fight with someone by changing the name of a wifi hotspot. getting back at your bitch of a daughter who won’t talk to you by filling out HR paperwork so that it’s SUPER clear you only meant the other one and NOT this one SO THERE. etc. what a fucking child.

#long post #gav gab #gd. sorry for this. i'm still just trying to like. get my mind around it.#abuse cw #death cw

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beesmygod · 2 years ago

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I'm glad you watched another playthrough of the devil in me bc sgfs run made it look so bad I wondered if he had missed some absolutely crucial game choice but no I guess it really is just like that

the shit makes no sense. im going to "spoil" it rn but like. you can't spoil this game. theres no twist theres just a fucked up guy who walks at you. the killer was killerman. you win prize money.

like lets do a quick list of what was good ("good") and what wasnt. most of these are just going to be moments or isolated plot elements

THE BAD:

it wasnt as accidentally funny as their previous games. accidentally funny i mean.

it had the audacity to end with someone picking up the h.h. holmes mask (not a thing that exists btw. no one is making these except like custom on etsy. its so fucking suspicious) like "oooh hes going to do it agaiiiin!" but he got chopped up by a boat propeller. no he isnt

the areas and parts where certain players were "supposed" to die were REALLY telegraphed and detrimental to the pacing of an already artificially bloated plot

why was there a dog that hated the murderer living on the island waiting to bite the shit out of him. whose dog was that. why was there dog. cheap emotional fodder tossed in at the end.

the opening kill is legitimately unpleasant to watch. they forgot that the kills are supposed to be gruesome and not stomach churningly sadistic or remind me of holocaust movies

the characters are genuinely awful and boring people who hate each other. not a single lifeline to be had. even the dog shows up too late for you to establish any kind of friendship

the reason why no one has cell phones is because a guy who is tricking them into taking his place as the murder victims just takes them as part of the "experience". they're a fucking film crew lol. theres no way

i legit thought it was going to end up being a team of people bc he was somehow everywhere at once doing the slow jason walk

instead it's one man, an ex-FBI agent who was abused by his mom and gets talked into doing serial murder by the single lamest serial killer monologue ive ever heard in my life. its just a guy who decided to try something different one day. and then i guess he built a murder hotel after faking his death so he could do more murder. this sucks. i dont care about this.

the plot elements are completely random. the animatronics made out of PEOPLE (they apparently did not get the news that they were beat to this idea by a solid near decade) have nothing to do with anything at all. not h.h. holmes, not murder hotel. they're just there for no reason. they barely even get used.

and they had the audacity to show him MAKING animatronics OF THE 5 FILM CREW MEMBERS after they arrived on the island. this game takes place over the course of one day. he did not do this. there is no way. this game stretches the player's suspension of disbelief too far.

the writing on the mom and the serial killer is pathetic lol. its rough to see evil attempted by people who can only conceptualize it in terms of physical violence

oh great another taxidermy guy. thanks

it was just some guy

THE "GOOD"

the ending is so bad that its ballsy. it cuts to a news reporter talking about how they are still finding bodies in the hotel where 5 person groups were tricked into staying so that they could be murdered. the ppl watching the report are interrupted by their friend who tells them her viral video won a contest (dog its 2022 lol) and the prize is that 5 of them get to stay in a mysterious hotel owned by a man with the same name as the guy they were just talking about.

then it zooms into the email the girl got telling her that she won and that one image of h.h. holmes is just in the window

did he make the little graphic announcing she has won? did he deliberately include himself? did he not notice somehow that he was in the picture. did he set up a timer and run up to the top floor so he could be very spooky and mysterious

HOW could he POSSIBLY afford another murder house. the invoice for the first one on the private island is IN THE GAME and its an eye popping amount. he does NOT have another house like where is he getting the money? or getting it zoned? or tricking ANOTHER construction team into building death traps that are suspiciously like the ones on the news

theres a part where a woman is stuck in a closet having an anxiety/asthma attack and the scary murder man gives her her inhaler. for some reason. this is never explained

why did he have ultra specific recordings of his mom commenting on what time he arrives and what page of his baby book he looks at. or what time it is.

theres phonographs and creepy music playing everywhere and no one turns them off like "what the fuck!!!" they're just like ooooh no im being menaced SSOOOO much

why was one of the crew members friends with someone who was strangled by "the campus strangler". as far as i can tell this adds nothing to the story, it just freaks her. as the player i dont care bc the the killerman just finds this out somehow and finds a copy of the paper where they used a photo taken of her, her friend and the strangler. guess which one is the strangler:

how could they identify his fake dead body from "dental records". they explicit say this. did he fucking glue a set of teeth into the guys mouth. is he toothless throughout the whole game. is he wearing fake teeth. im laughing just typing this up. what the fuck

he pulled an hh holmes on the construction crew after they built a hh holmes themed murder hotel for him.

the murder counter. why does it exist. how does it know to update.

im now thinking about how funny it is that he put in a 4th digit. get real dude! no WAY

the director being baited into an obvious trap with cigarettes like he was being hunted by wiley e. coyote was insane. my dude you are being murdered. you know you are at this point. why did you go into the room with only one entrance!!

this:

it was just some guy

#long post

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gizkasparadise · 1 year ago

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hi!! i love your taste in dramas and i was wondering if you have any more villain romance recs, specifically cdrama recs? i finished lbfad and tiger & rose already and im currently watching twisted fate of love (and LOVING it hehe)

yay i love villain romances!! gonna include villains and villain-lites! my favorites on this list are goodbye my princess and arthdal chronicles for villain main leads and love and redemption, monarch industry, empress ki, extraordinary you, chicago typewriter, and bridal mask/gaksital for villainy second leads!

cdrama: villain is the main lead

the ultimate villain romance for me is goodbye my princess. the male lead is fucking horrendous but compelling and it's a tragedy from start to finish. don't watch if you want healthy relationships, someone changing for the better through the power of love, or a happy ending. do watch if you're in the mood to just get fucked up and see gorgeous costumes and scenery while doing so (also my favorite cdrama ost!). romance of tiger and rose is kind of a romcom parody of this one, too!

the legends is a nice sort of gender flip-- the female lead is basically a hot shit, overpowered demon and the male lead is a gentle guy trying to do bad all on his own because he's full of heart eyes. there's also a secondary antagonist who has a thing for the female lead, so double villainy!

word of honor. i have not finished this one, but one of the male leads def fits this bill!

the rise of phoenixes. not really a villain ML, exactly, but he's very machiavellian and schemey so if you liked the lead in twisted fate of love, you'd DEFINITELY like him (i need to finish this drama!!!)

...till the end of the moon. which i dont think i recommend, but feel compelled to mention. here's the deal: the middle arc, like eps 19-30ish? fucking perfection! the bookends on either side? dont do nearly as much. the end? i dont know her (literally, i didnt bother with the last ep). idk try it out if you're starving for costume villain love trapped in a masochism tango, but....watch some of the other dramas on this list first

cdrama: villainy second lead and/or main antagonist is in love with the lead

love and redemption and dear god you'll need a stress ball

monarch industry/the rebel princess has shades of this

prince of lan ling

kdrama: villain is the main lead

arthdal chronicles has a male lead having a villainous crush on the female lead (and they are VERY ship baity), as well as the second male and female leads both being villains and in love. i love iiiit, but be warned it ends on a cliffhanger and s2 isnt out yet

cheese in the trap. the male lead is not a great dude. a lot of people dont like this drama, but i love it (aside from a weak last ep)

everyone's just a little bit shitty in bloody heart, to include the male lead

the male lead in little women will have you guessing from start to finish if you're a clown for trusting him or not

who the villain is is kind of a rotating door in the series, but the main male lead in moon lovers: scarlet heart ryeo definitely spends time in anti-hero land

que sera sera and when a man's in love/man in love are older dramas with male leads who are definitely Questionable (the former is described as a bastard in the synopsis and the latter is an ex-gangster trying to go legit but not quite able to shake the gangster tendencies). neither story is a traditional romance, and there's a lot of content warnings to be mindful of (lots of slapping and hitting in the former, cheating in the second [and probably some slapping])

depending on your POV (or the point of the story) the main love interest from empress ki could qualify! and then there's a support character who's a straight up villain that's got a crush

i dont want to tell you anything because spoilers! but there's flavors of this with king in love/the king loves

kdrama: villainy second lead and/or primary antagonist is in love with the lead

extraordinary you

mr. sunshine (more anti-hero than villain, but you'll get that flavor with dong mae aka my most intense SLS ever)

dali and the cocky prince

the princess' man

tale of nokdu

chicago typewriter (more villainous crush than full on love line)

bridal mask/gaksital (the male lead also starts out as a villain in this one!)

from now on, showtime! features a villainous crush and i wish the backstory eps were their own drama because i loved them

#asks!#cdrama #kdrama

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11queensupreme11 · 1 year ago

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hey! i've been following you through tsunami from the last six months and made my way here after the introduction of arsenic blues and i've learned to treat your words as gospel bc ur a literal genius!!!

anyways you've mentioned that (correct me if i'm wrong) you are going the psycharity route through a psychology major. funny enough i've been considering psychiatry for a while as i know that i want to be in the medical field and this route aligns best with my interests.

anyways i was wondering about the route you're taking and any insider tips and tricks (of sorts) that you have. i'm totally dreading med school and the MCAT and essentially the entire academic process. (i would totally consider being a therapist and going more that route but i do want to learn a lot of the emergency aid as a backup and for like practical purposes and also i need that salary in this economy...)

anyways, so what classes do you feel is the best in helping you (or the most interesting lol)? what about the major bc im worried that biochem or something else will give me a lot of unnecessary classes that only may or may not help me on the mcat? how do you manage your time and study in general?

anything helps! (this is going to be so embarrassing if i get some of the facts wrong lol)

i haven't taken the mcat yet or prepped for it, but this man i knew HEAVILY recommended using the kaplan mcat prep books because that helped him the most

this is the link but dont buy it until you're ready to start studying

as for classes, i can't really tell you which classes you take because it all depends in your school. i do suggest to check your college website to see if it has a page with a list of recommended classes needed for med school. if there's no page, then please PLEASE go talk to a guidance counselor/advisor so they could tell you what premed courses to take

i think it'd be easier to major in biology cuz a lot of classes required for the major also fall under the requirements for med school! i just really really really like psychology more, so i decided to major in that. you can do that too, but just be aware you'd be taking classes for your GE requirements, major requirements, AND premed requirements. you most likely won't be able to graduate within the timeframe you want.

when you're picking your classes for the semester tho.... pls don't stack together all your stem courses like i'm doing lol. i'm taking a bio with lecture and lab, an anthro class with lecture and lab, a calculus class, and some psych classes. unless you're absolutely certain that you can handle the stress, i suggest you take a few stem classes and a few non-stem classes to even it out.

(beware that if you do shit in the semester, you'll be put in academic probation 💀)

another thing you should note, there are two types of med school: an md (doctor of medicine) and DO (doctor of osteopathic medicine). do is the "easier" (it's actually not, just easier compared to md) path and not as competitive. psychiatry is both MD and DO friendly which is good, but the issue is that some residency programs are elitist and look down on DOs 🙄

AND MOST IMPORTANTLY, FIND CLINICAL EXPERIENCE!!! i can't help you with that because i haven't done any yet 💀

actually i was wrong, this is the most important: GET SCHOLARSHIPS!!!! AND GRANTS!!!! MEDICAL SCHOOL IS PRICY!!!!

#👸🏻| asks

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hematomes · 1 year ago

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Saw your post about backstories and came running! I hope you don't mind me rambling a bit.

Personally, I feel like if a backstory of a villain that the writers want us to sympathize with is very convoluted, poorly written and messily executed, that could cause some issues. I have seen quite a few backstories that, aside from being boringly cliché and inexcusable to the characters' actions, have made little if any sense with their current motives and goals.

(Though, to be fair, some of the villains I can think of (outside of Genshin) look like they were created with a list of what makes a character sympathetic/tragic in mind but no one on the writing team decided to be innovative about each thing written on the list.)

But besides their backstories, I feel like having likable traits are also what make even the most loathsome villains fun or interesting. Despite being the bastard he is, I'd love to see more of Dottore.

Ngl, I was wondering how they were going to make me sympathize with Scaramouche and HOLY SHIT did they exceed my expectations. Everything about his character just works for him and I love it. And though he's not a villain any more, I love how much of a sassy, little shit he is.

Hoo, anyways, sorry for rambling. Hope everything I've said made some sense.

hi fren im sorryyyy tumblr initially deleted my response and i was desperate

anyway you bring up good points!! im a bit conflicted as far as scara's redemption arc is concerned tbh, i have a lot of qualms with it but not on an individual scale - for wanderer himself it was perfect, coherent and introduced in an interesting way. it's more... the plotholes and unresolved issues regarding his past relationships, and knowing they'll probably never have any closure bc it's like he never existed in the first place

but yeah back to the whole villain point, i will just add that im not a big fan of the "holier than thou" attitude some fans (not u friend dw) have towards ppl who like antagonists. specifically horrible antagonists like, say, dottore. i was talking about it w a mutual here and like yeah it's insane how sometimes people want you to justify liking a fictional character? 😭 man idk

#— answered #— kataba

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actualbird · 1 year ago

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Hello, i can’t stop thinking about all the dangling plot and character threads left by chapter 9, it’s taking up so much brain space man. Reading your thoughts about it has been really fun though so thanks for that!

I personally believe the main story timeline includes all the card stories available at launch (everything pre-qixi) as well as the first two personal story chapters of each guy.

But speaking of separate timelines (the way i see it), i really wonder what chapter 9 would look like in the world where lukerosa are dating. Because the main story cases would probably still occur in the other timelines and the NXX team would still go investigate them.

Like luke would probably be less aggressive and secretive and desperate and sad throughout… But also if the Oedipus here is the same Oedipus from luke’s personal story, then he’s either been caught, or they know his identity (daniel song, i think it was?) and have evidence against him. I feel like SO MUCH would be different.

Also, this verges on headcanon territory, but I like to imagine that in worlds where rosa started openly dating one of them from the 1st anniv, the boys get along slightly better because they’re no longer aggressively competing for her attention. A year should be enough time to move on (i have no idea tbh) but they’d still have a soft spot for her, something like that. So there’s that possibility to consider.

(Please hoyo… let them be friends… let them care for each other and actually like spending time together… i beg. The current relationships are complex and fascinating but I like it so much better when the love interests get along…)

Anyway, thanks for reading through this super long ask, i hope you have a wonderful day!

// spoilers for tot main story 9

hi anon!! hehe im glad my main story 9 ramblings have been enjoyable to read! im tryna calm down on them a bit because i realized i rambled a LOT AJHFSVASOFAL but in my defense….there was just SO much to chew on

as much as i didnt wanna think about timelines since it gives me a headache, i eventually did HAHA and i agree with you!! the first available card stories are also super aligned in to the beginning of main story (ex. in SR Timely Rescue, mc does not yet know that luke is an NSB agent, meaning that SR Timely Rescue must have happened before main story 5)

like in my brain, the now General Timeline Of Things That Possibly Happened In The Main Story Universe Are, In Order:

Main Story 1

Any and all of luke’s cards available at launch

Main Story 2

Any and all of vyn’s cards available at launch

Main Story 3

Any and all of artem’s cards available at launch

Main Story 4

Any and all of marius’ cards available at launch

Possibly all of the boys’ personal story sweet chapters 1-2

Main Story 5.1, 5.2, 5.3

ARTEM’S XMAS PARTYLAND CARD FOR SOME REASON??? (it was vaguely referenced in 6.2 and this never stops haunting me logistically)

Main Story 6.1, 6.2

Main Story 7

Main Story 8

Main Story 9

like, this timeline is the general thing my brain has accepted since it means that at least mc has Gotten To Know the boys more (and all the launch cards go after each boys' respective First main story focus episode because she'd need to be re-introduced/introduced to them first....though after main story 2, the boys' respective launch cards can get more shuffled. since in main story 2 she meets Both vyn and marius, and artem's can also be shuffled around since shes known him for a while already anyway) BUT has not yet started the deeper chain of events that trigger the boys’ respective character arcs (and also their romantic routes). but again this is….very general. very wibbly wobbly timey wimey. after making that chronological list i tried thinking about the event stories and then my brain just exploded so i’ll stop here HAHAKJFSKDJF

the AU of a chapter 9 after luke’s gone through both emotional development and also being less of a sad sack of shit thanks to mc is VERY INTERESTING TO ME. i agree on the pragmatism that the Oedipus investigation would be affected, theyd have people they can already question and leads that they could check through again. and on the emotional side……he’d be less aggressive deffo, but i still think he’d be quite upset and affected by everything. the big thing that interests me with chapter 9 and luke’s character is how his worsening illness changed his behavior so much. he’ll be doing Better having mc as his support and also having learned more honesty and vulnerability, but his progressing illness would still deffo have him on edge because currently....his illness has progressed and worsened Only in main story 9, nowhere else. his personal story sweet chapters dont mention it, his post-anniv cards dont mention it except for in SSR Dream of Benji but we're not shown any symptoms at all, much less new ones.

...man it's kinda sad to think about now honestly because right now, ch9!luke is the one who goes through the more intense version of the nightmare hes always been afraid of. and yet, hes also the only one without the support system and life outlook to help keep him afloat.....

//LOUD SOBBING

aNYHOO, i love ur hc on the boys having a Romantic Feels Armistice. frankly the timeframe of “moving on” varies a LOT, but all the boys care about mc deeply. itd hurt, yeah, but seeing her happy is most important ;w;

which is to say, I WILL NEVER STOP BELIEVING IN NXX INVESTIGATION TEAM DEEP FRIENDSHIP!!!!! NEVER!!!! //HOLDS ONTO THE TEAM GENTLY, PROTECTIVELY!!!! ;^;

#tot spoilers #the event stories are tough cuz...a bUNCH of them also reference the overarching nxx case!!! like SOTT and BTR!!! but wHEN? CAN THEY HAPPEN #and the Actual In-Game passage of time is weird too cuz my god remember how main story 7 happens just HOURS after 6.2??#...i need to stop thinking about this or im gonna pop a blood vessel jkvKJVSJFS #asks #anon

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